#crazy woman and her daughter are both fucked in the head!! more news at 6!

[partiallypearl]

insp.

[bratshaws]

goodness gracious 69. brb x oc

a/n: this chapter was just fun to write IM VERY HAPPY WITH HOW THESE CHAPTERS ARE LOOKING

check out the fic's playlist made by the sweet @wiipes !!

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: Fluff, Rooster being a good boyfriend ( again and we love that)

chapters:

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64

65/66/67/68

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-

Beatrice smiled looking down at her phone when her father messaged her, letting her know they were finally home and giving her a short explanation on how he knew Jeff.

Apparently, they were best friends in high school but lost contact when Jeff joined the Navy, alongside a group of people they were buddies with in the late 70’s and he was happy he was able to talk to him again.

And so was she, not only had her father finally understood that her job was a good job, he now trusted the environment she worked in and the people surrounding her. And it was all because of Rooster, who right now was sipping on his morning coffee watching TV. in her living room while she leaned against the door frame, feeling her stomach and chest flutter with wild butterflies.

The fact that he stepped up, without her knowing nor asking him to, to resolve this whole drama between her and her father made her speechless. Everyday since their relationship began she wondered how the hell she was able to have someone like him, of course now the bad thoughts were much less than before and she could understand what a healthy relationship should look like. 

Her bare feet tap on the floor as she makes her way over to Rooster, whose eyes move towards her, a little smile forming on his face, “Hey.” he calls, watching her toss her phone to her coffee table and then crawl on his lap, a movement that he didn’t stop, he just lifted his coffee mug a bit higher so the hot beverage wouldn’t land on her. Beatrice hummed happily, her ear on his chest hearing his heartbeat, “This is a nice way to start a morning.” he murmurs, lowering his lips to the top of her head as her hands were tucked between their chests.

Bea giggles, her cheek still pressed to his pecs, “I’m glad you think the same thing.” she whispers, closing her eyes with a blissful smile. She wasn’t paying much attention to what was going on in the TV, choosing to hear his heartbeat instead, “What are you watching?”

“The news,” he begins, “Someone stole a llama from a farmer and drove it all the way to LA.” he finishes his sentence by drinking more of his coffee, licking his lips to get rid of any drops, “Apparently her daughter wanted a llama for her birthday, so instead of doing the rational thing of buying a stuffed toy she stole a living and loved animal…did I mention how LA is fucking crazy?”

Beatrice laughs softly against him, turning her head a bit more to see what was going on the TV screen, the picture of a blonde disheveled woman that seemed to have way too much lip filler appeared, soon followed by an old man holding a large white llama, “That’s so messed up,I’m glad he could get his llama back.” She says, “I never understood parents like that. It’s so awful, I hate spoiled kids and spoiled parents.”

“Me too.”

The continuity of that conversation held in the air like a bait waiting to be bitten by a fish in a dark pond but neither of them dared to speak any more about that, even if they both wanted to deep inside. “I just think some people shouldn’t be parents.” it comes out without her planning, biting her lower lip gently and fearing she’d be speaking about her own wants out loud to him, “You know? Like, children aren’t toys you can just have.”

Rooster nodded above her head, propping his chin on her hair as the two kept on watching the news channel. There was going to be another drop in temperature in a few days, a group of women beat a peeping tom up enough for the guy to call the police himself and a lost dog returned home after three months missing. Rarely were the days where the news were this lighthearted and he was honestly very happy to see it that way.

Beatrice looks up at him when he drinks the final drops of his coffee, “I’ll take the mug back.” but the hand on her lower back, preventing her from leaving his lap stopped her in her tracks. “Rooster.”

“You are so comfortable there.” he shrugs, as if he just said the most obvious thing with the little boyish smirk she loved so much, “You don’t have to leave now, do you?” but she tilted her head at him, plucking the mug from his hand and pecking his lips, a distraction much needed so she could slide off his lap, the pilot moaning out his complaint at the lack of warmth on his legs, “Baby…”

“I’ll come back soon, Roos.” she says, giving him the same smile that made his knees weak, “Just let me wash this and I’ll be back before you know it.” Beatrice walks out of the living room backwards, seeing how his head turned to follow her movements until he couldn’t anymore.

Bradley chuckles softly, shaking his head with amusement. She was just so great, he wished they could move in together faster but because of their leases they still had a few more months to wait before that could happen. Well, until then he could survive visiting her and vice versa, he was already used to her presence - and Jolene’s, who was currently lying outside on the small patch of grass that consisted of Beatrice's backyard. 

He runs his hands up and down his face, scratching the back of his head and immediately smiling when he hears her footsteps returning. He stretches his arms towards her, making grabby hands to the brunette “C’mere, gorgeous.” he says, making Beatrice laugh softly and then return to her spot on his lap, his arms hugging her middle tightly and pushing her up against him. Once she’s comfortable, and so is he, he presses another kiss to her forehead, “So what’s the plans for today?”

Beatrice blinks, thinking about it for a while, then she lets out a quiet ‘oh’ “I’m going to meet Marcus.” she says, almost as if she completely forgot about it, “...I talked to him and he said you can come with me and Ev.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, he said it’s fine.” she shrugs, smiling when his fingers comb through her brown tresses, twirling it once he reaches the ends of her hair. Beatrice furrows her eyebrows, chewing her lower lip nervously, “I keep wondering if this is a good idea or not.” she begins, “I–I’ve never done that before, Roos. I never even thought someone would be interested in me as a model.”

Bradley sighs softly, still caressing her hair, “I mean, it’s a nice opportunity, isn’t it?” she nodded against his chest but he could feel she was still worried, “What is bothering you about it?”

Her own body issues. Her self-doubt that even with Rooster being so openly vocal on how he thought she was sexy she still had moments where she would get…self-conscious. “I don’t know, everything? He said I’ll have to wear swimwear and such and,I-I don’t know.” her boyfriend said nothing, so Beatrice looked up at him to check if he was okay, only to see his eyes glaze over and look distant, “Are you just imagining me wearing bikinis, Bradley?”

He blinks his eyes down at her, shameless as always when he says, “Yeah.” he smiles, kissing her red cheeks, “Might get some of the pictures and keep it with me when I’m gone. You know, to keep myself sane while I’m away from you.” Beatrice’s cheeks only reddened more, but her smile widened, muttering a sweet thank you against his lips before she sat up better on his crotch, a movement that he deeply enjoyed, his hands immediately dropping to her hips, “You’ll do amazing.”

“I think my fear is…I don’t know, maybe I'm making a fool of myself?” she suggests with a shrug of her shoulders, “I know why I’m doing this,for both the car and to help when we move in together but still, I don’t know. You saw how my dad reacted when he was talking about the bar, I’m scared of how he’ll be when he finds out about it.”

Ah.

It shouldn’t surprise him that the events from yesterday were still fresh in her mind and he couldn’t blame her for being worried, even if it was a little bit about how her family would be.

He leans back onto the couch, sliding his hands under her night shirt so they touched the soft skin of her back and waist, “Baby, look at me,” he calls when she drops her gaze to her hands, worry written all over her face, “I understand your worry, but…you aren’t a child anymore and you aren’t disgracing your family by doing this. You know? It’s your choice, your father has to understand that you have the right to do things you want. You are an adult.”

“I know,I know you are right.” she frowns, then parts her lips, “God I’ll be thirty next month.” she mutters in shock, “I…wow,I completely forgot about it.”  considering she expected to be celebrating her thirties in a much less than happy position. Not alone but still single and wondering where to go from there, at best she and Shells would go to karaoke or go bowling, or both and probably get really drunk before the night turned into morning…and yet now she had Rooster and her whole world changed. 

Beatrice laughs to herself, a quick chuff of a laugh, but something that did call his attention, “What’s funny?”

“I’ll be thirty next month.” she repeats, adjusting herself on his lap so she could sit sideways, her shoulder now resting on his chest as she chews the side of her thumb, “I’ll be thirty next month. Holy shit. I genuinely expected to…you know, repeat the routine from the past years but now everything changed and I think I’m still…trying to wrap my head around it.”

Bradley furrows his eyebrows, pulling her closer to himself so he could place his chin on the curve of her shoulder, “What do you mean?”

“Well,” she makes some noises, words that don’t come out as she tries to translate her thoughts into a full sentence, “I just–well, you know,I never expected…us.” she says softly, “And I am very happy we are here, together, I just…I’ve spent my birthday with my friends and family for so long…I guess I’m just,I’m just trying to understand all this. You know? I’ll be thirty. Thirty! I guess I just,” she shrugs, biting her lower lip, “I just am trying to make my brain understand that what I had planned for my thirtieth birthday won’t happen.”

“What did you have planned?”

“...Honestly, probably going out with Shells, maybe Ev too if she wanted, and going bowling.”

Rooster hums, a bit confused by her answer, “I thought you’d go all out, I don’t know, rent a club,” Beatrice chortles at the suggestion, giving him a disbelieved look, “Or a bar, or something.”

“What did you do when you turned thirty?” she asks softly, “Did you go all out?”

He thinks on it, for a second, before he answers, “I was deployed. I had a cupcake that the other pilots gave me and that’s how it was.” Beatrice’s eyes saddened, but he just chuckles, ‘It wasn’t so bad, I mean, it was pretty cool to have a birthday like that…plus the other ones afterwards were better.” she doesn’t seem convinced, but she does lean back on his chest, his lips pressing soft kisses to her temple, “But you could have something fun, right?“

“I guess? I’d have to think about it.” she murmurs, “I don’t–maybe I should go to Pinterest and get ideas because I don’t know how the hell I’ll do anything.” she places both hands on her face, looking a bit distraught thinking of everything she’d have to plan, “I mean…I guess I’ll have time to do everything…I’ll have until a week before the 12th so.” Bradley just smiles when she starts mumbling to herself, undoubtedly making scenarios in her head about how she could get everything she wanted - and everyone she wanted - quickly. 

She was just such a good person she’d probably make sure her birthday was fun for others more than herself, and she’d probably be too worried wondering if everyone was having fun much like the NYE party. With that in mind, something popped in his head, an idea that he thought she’d like…but he’d need help to do it. A lot of help.

“Well, anyway,” she says suddenly, “I’ll think about that later, I’ll go take a shower, then message Evelyn and then we can visit Marcus’ studio.” Beatrice slides out from his lap and Rooster stands up as well, hugging her from behind and kissing the soft skin of her neck, “Oh, we are going to shower together?” He hums positively against her, not giving her enough time to react when he just picked her up bridal style and rushed up the stairs with Beatrice laughing all the way.

-

Both him and Beatrice expected a tall building, much like Evelyn’s was, when they got to Marcus’ studio. Evelyn joined them, except she was the one driving ahead and leading them to the building, a building that much to their surprise wasn’t like Evelyn’s, it was actually a three story building that looked very out of place in such an area in San Diego. 

Evelyn told them, when they all stepped out of the cars, that it used to be a candy factory in the 1920s and that Marcus made the whole building his entire studio. Beatrice held Bradley’s hand as Evelyn walked in first, greeting a woman with short buzzed light colored hair, probably Whitney whom Marcus talked about before, and nodded towards them to follow her. The first floor was almost like a large runway with long platforms that disappeared from their view behind long red curtains.

Following Evelyn and Whitney up the stairs, beautiful vintage spiral staircases that had iron flowers on the railing, they reached the second floor where they could hear the repetitive sound of sewing machines and voices coming from behind dark double doors. Whitney opens it with a flair, then gestures to them to enter as she waits by the door on the left, “Wow…” is all Beatrice could say. Large windows, from floor to ceiling, illuminated a large atelier surrounded by mannequins, fabrics of all colors and pictures of past collections and models adorned the brick walls.

There were other people in there, working on the sewing machines they heard coming up the stairs, all of them dressed in either black or dark gray, looking up at the two when they walked past them. Down the hallway of sewing machines stood Marcus, who was currently holding a sequined red fabric up, a short woman rolled up the rest of the rolled up fabric in front of him, “No, no sequin is very tacky, maybe the next time–” he looks over his shoulder, through his thick yellow glasses and smiles, “Oh! But never mind that!Evelyn! Darling!”

“Marcus.” he air kisses Evelyn, hugging her once he’s done and the woman gestures to the couple standing right behind her, “I’m sure you know Bea.”

“My muse!” Bradley bristled a bit at the sudden compliment, just staring with a confused gaze when Marcus wrapped his arms around a shocked Beatrice, patting her back and air kissing her as well, “How good to see you, and I assume this is your boyfriend.” he’s almost as tall as Rooster was, so they meet gazes immediately “Ah, my manners, so silly of me. Marcus.” he holds out his hand for the pilot to shake.

Which he does, “Bradley.” he says firmly, then goes back to hold Beatrice’s hand and holding her to his side, “Big place you got here.” Marcus looks around proudly, his maroon silk shirt moving when he does, nodding to himself.

“I need space to show the world my art.” Marcus smiles, then clasps his hands together, “So, Beatrice,I am so happy you are here. Come, come,” he flaps his hand for them to follow him, which they do, Beatrice giving Bradley a small smile as they walk past a few mannequins and piles of fabric, “Because I have to take your measurements, darling and, give you some fabric tests.”

Beatrice’s breath hitches at ‘measurements’ her brain going into panic mode immediately thinking it’d just be as awkward as it was when she was a child. She hadn’t had anyone measure her ever since her prom, Evelyn managed to get her the Catwoman outfit by using some of her clothes for size, “Oh, ah, right.” she looks up to the ceiling where a large rose-like chandelier dangled above their heads, “I should’ve bought extra clothes for you to measure then, huh?” she laughs awkwardly, trying to think that maybe that’s what he meant.

Marcus drapes the measuring tape around his neck, looking back at her with his eyebrows furrowed “Oh, no, no, I’d need to take your measurements, darling.Not your size. It’ll be fine!” he’s quick to say when Beatrice loses all color from her face, clenching Rooster’s hand just a bit tighter. Rooster, in all his protective boyfriend aura that he was, stood by watching this whole endeavor with his eyes slightly narrowed. His biggest worry was Bea being uncomfortable and he hoped Marcus wouldn’t leave her like that.

Beatrice looks back at him with her lip in her mouth, “Well…I-I guess I’ll have to, um…go there.” she sighs, looking back at Evelyn who stood a bit further behind, with her arms crossed leaning on the tall shelves that had all the fabrics he’d want to use. The black haired woman gave her a nod, then a thumbs up, “Okay. Well, here I go.” 

“I’ll be right here.”Bradley says gently, slowly letting go of her hand and watching his girlfriend step closer to the fashion designer. His hands clenched and relaxed out of habit, choosing that keeping them in his pockets might be a better idea instead. He didn’t move his eyes away from the two, watching Beatrice’s reactions to whatever Marcus would tell her and if she seemed upset. She didn’t, she was actually smiling a little bit, looking back at Rooster with a red face when Marcus whispered something to her. 

Bradley smiles back, giving her a quick wink and then looking to where Evelyn was. Instead of her leaning position as before, she was now seated on a wine colored couch with her legs crossed by the knee, flipping through a random magazine, “You better sit down.” she says without taking her eyes from it, “This will take a little while.” he hesitated, making sure that the couch was perfect to keep his eyes on Beatrice at a distance, backing away until he finally sits down. The couch’s cushions make a noise when he does, it wasn’t a new couch if the creaky noise was any hint, crossing his arms over his chest with Beatrice still in his line of vision.

Marcus was measuring her upper body first, calling an assistant to write down something on an Ipad as he chatted with Beatrice. His girlfriend seemed to slowly relax, her shoulders losing some of the tension from before the more Marcus talked to her. Which was good, again, her comfort was his only worry right now “You know, she’s not going to disappear if you look away.” Evelyn’s calm voice broke his line of thought, the pilot turning towards her with his arms still crossed, “He’s not going to make her feel bad, believe me. She’s already his favorite model even before the photo shoot.”

Rooster licked his lips, facing back to where they stood to see Marcus had the measuring tape around her chest, asking her to hold it as comfortable as she would as he wrote down the numbers. “I don’t blame him.” he mutters with a soft smile, “She has that power over people.”

“Look at you all goopy and love struck.” Evelyn chuckles, flipping another page, “It’s precious, and nauseating.”

Bradley laughs quietly, leaning back on the couch after he feels his own tension slipping away, “Speaking of which, you just started dating Jake without telling anyone and we had to find out via Shells.” Evelyn just moved her gaze towards him for a second before returning to the magazine “I’m surprised he’s so quiet about you, he does talk but you’d think he’d be boasting around like a madman.”

“Well, I asked him to keep the noise to a minimum.” she smiles, “Plus, my father is around the base a lot and he’s still getting used to the idea of myself and Jake.”

Oh how he wanted to be a little fly on the wall to see the reaction of both Cyclone and Jake when they met each other in different circumstances. He had no pleasure thinking about his friend shitting his pants a little bit - okay he was lying, he had a bit of pleasure imagining Jake shaking in his boots as he tells Cyclone he was now dating his daughter. Must’ve been quite a night…for all of them.

“Well, good for you too. He needed someone to slap some sense into him.” he comments, watching Marcus finish his measurements and then hold a pinkish red fabric to her chest, pulling it to the sides so it’d be tight on her body.

That was a beautiful color on her. Any shade of red or pink looked really good on her skin. He crossed his own leg, supporting his ankle atop his knee, casually leaning closer to Evelyn when Beatrice looked away, “Bea’s birthday is next month.” He says quietly, making sure to keep his voice just loud enough for Evelyn to hear.

“I am aware.” she replies in the same tone, “Anything in mind?”

“I was just wondering…had Bea ever had a surprise party? She never told me and it’d be very suspicious to ask about it now.”

Evelyn had an amazing poker face, because she didn’t express any other sentiment, simply held the magazine up to her face to cover her mouth while Rooster did the same with his own hand as if he was supporting his chin, “She hasn’t. You want to give her one?” he nods subtly and Evelyn couldn’t hide her smile now, “She’s going to love it,Rooster. You remember how she reacted when you brought all of us to the bar.”

Evelyn had to give it to him, he was a very interested and caring boyfriend when it came to Beatrice. She had to admit that when she heard about him, she wasn’t expecting him to be the all out type of guy who’d be so into his girlfriend and would go out of his way to make her happy. And she also knew Beatrice would often think it wasn’t needed, maybe even tell Rooster that but she’d love it deep inside. So the idea of a surprise party was very sweet and very romantic too.

“I’d need some help.” he mutters, shifting his eyes surreptitiously towards Evelyn who just looked back with her eyebrow up, “On working on it. I don’t know if I’ll suddenly get deployed during her birthday, I hope not.” he knocks the wood armrest by his side, “But if I do I’d want someone else to take over while I’m gone.”

“And that person would be me?”

“Or Shells–”

“Shells is great but she sometimes gets way too distracted to manage a surprise party.” she explains quickly, “I’ll do it.”

Rooster nods, thanking her without words before his eyes return to Beatrice, who was now holding several different fabric samples in her hands, holding the ones she liked the most - reds, pinks, florals - for Marcus to see. She looks back at the pilot, then talks to Marcus quickly who nods at her and she can step away for a bit.

Rooster straightens himself on the seat, holding back his hands because they almost touched her hips to bring her to his lap out of habit, “I need a second opinion.” she says softly, holding two tiny squares of fabric - one a soft lilac and the other a baby yellow- “I kinda like them both, but what do you guys think?”

“I like the lilac.” he says, “I think it’d look good on you.”

“I agree.” Evelyn says without taking her eyes off the magazine, “You have a yellow undertone to your skin so I think it’d work better that way.”

Beatrice looks at her own wrist, holding the yellow fabric to it and letting out a surprised ‘oh’ when she sees what Evelyn meant, “Oh…okay, thank you guys.” she smiles, leaning down to peck Rooster’s lips, “They are for a bikini.” she whispers against his mouth, pulling back to face his shocked look by biting her lower lip and walking all the way back to where Marcus was. 

Rooster inhales deeply, clearing his throat after as he tries to get rid of the flurry of images that land on his brain, rubbing his jeans clad thighs with his huge hands before he stands to his feet in a flash, “I need to go to the bathroom.”

“It’s down the hall.” Evelyn says with a smile, “Go wash up, you need it.” he’s gone before she even finishes the sentence, laughing quietly to herself as she thumbed through the magazine.

[lovestuckyhatemarvel]

Oh hello, episode 4. Let’s see if you have more memorable things than the first three episodes did.

1.) It’s hard for Max to see that Billy is wrong ‘cause he’s always a kind of a jerk.

2.) I love Max telling El about comic books, especially Wonder Woman.

3.) I forgot how crazy the old woman is acting when they take her away in an ambulance.

4.) I can’t remember if Heather survives this season, but she’s gonna need a lot of therapy if she does survive and does remember it, because leaving her begging, sobbing parents in a basement to be possessed isn’t something you really get over.

5.) Real shitty of the mindflayer for making people be awake for the possession. Like c’mon.

6.) Why is Hopper not in a hospital?

7.) The boys are terrible at communication.

8.) Robin has a plan and took all the tips.

9.) I had thought that Heather’s dad looked familiar and had already forgotten until I saw him again that he’s the douchebag head of the paper.

10.) Is Mrs. Driscoll actually a paranoid schizophrenic or were they just having this man be weird?

11.) Nancy and Jonathan got fired.

12.) We gotta get El on a roller coaster.

13.) Learning about hosts for the Mind Flayer.

14.) Larry is a terrible liar. You’d think a politician would be a better liar. Actually scratch that, that makes sense.

15.) It is very hard to blackmail someone who has blackmail on you too.

16.) “Don’t give me that dead daughter sob story, because I just don’t care.” Shocked Hopper only broke his nose and not killed him.

17.) Ohhhhh. I forgot Hopper threatens to chop the man’s finger off with a cigar cutter.

18.) “Oliver Twist routine” Nancy really is classist. Also if Ted Wheeler really did make 6 figures in the 1980s, they really really were well off.

19.) Dustin is like Gumbo.

20.) I didn’t know Billy even owned a shirt. Did the Mind Flayer have to go shopping?

21.) ‘Boys only’? You’re being dumb, Mike.

22.) Having Erica be a huge fan of capitalism sucks. Bare minimum I need someone to have her eventually grow out of this immature phase and be like, “yeah, no, that was stupid. Capitalism sucks.” Because kids, capitalism sucks. It hurts everyone but the ultra rich.

23.) I forgot the mayor keeps the papers in his ugly house.

24.) I really do like to see Hopper outside of his work uniform. I also like to see JOyce putting stuff together.

25.) Aw, Nancy actually went to her mom.

26.) Like this is really a surface level reading of feminism to think ‘I am a woman and therefore damn the fallout and consequences because I am woman, hear me roar’ is the end all to be all. Like I love Nancy and Karen talking and loving each other but she did still blow up Jonathan’s spot and refer to him talking about his economic circumstances as ‘Oliver twist routine’. Like that was fucked up.

27.) I forgot how genuinely worried Max was about Billy. She really really hoped it wasn’t Billy that was the new host.

28.) Operation Child Endangerment is a great name, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise, Erica.

29.) You’d think a guy like a mayor would have handcuff keys by his bed.

30.) Steve is so fucking worried up until Erica walks through those doors.

31.) The wild thing is I’ve thought Billy’s actor, Dacre, is attractive in other things, but I do not think he’s attractive at all as Billy. Like both because of the hair and the attitude. He’s just terminally unfuckable to me. And it’s one of the many reasons I hate Steve/Billy. I also hate Eddie/Billy.

32.) Billy hit the back wall hard enough to break tiles. Either that or they’re shitty tiles.

33.) Fun fact, HIPAA didn’t exist until the 90s so the only thing stopping Nancy from just being a concerned neighbor getting answers would be hospital policy and how willing to talk the front desk woman is.

34.) “If you die, I die.” “…Okay.”

35.) I forgot that the fucking elevator plummets like it’s a goddamn roller coaster ride.

36.) I had blocked out Billy sobbing in the sauna and saying ‘he made me do it’ entirely.

37.) Max is so sad and so worried about Max.

38.) if Will didn’t have Spidey senses, Max would have gotten stabbed with broken tile and sauna glass.

39.) I forgot Billy gets pinned to the wall with weights and it keeps cutting back to Mrs. Driscoll looking horrifying.

40.) I also forgot that Billy’s body is forced to choke El. Also that Mike is the one who takes a bat to possessed Billy to save her.

41.) And then Billy got thrown through a brick wall before getting up and walking off.

42.) There’s so many people in that abandoned factory.

[soulmate-game]

Well that happened.

B!dbwm 2020

Day 6: Meeting the Justice League

Marinette paced in her bedroom in Wayne Manor, running her hands through her hair as Damian laid on her bed and played animal crossing while completely ignoring her freakout. 

“Dami, how did I get myself into this mess?!” she asked, frantically pulling at her pigtails. Her brother snorted, rolling his eyes unsympathetically. 

“You never use your brain until after you’ve already made important decisions,” he responded ruthlessly. “All of your mental capacity goes towards planning out completely inane things like birthday parties and actually caring about what our even more idiotic class thinks about you, so when you actually need it you don’t have any intelligence left to spare.” 

Marinette turned her eyes on him, the blue lightening to an icy color in her panicked annoyance as she glared at him. “Gee, thanks. I can always trust my darling brother to have my back,” she said sarcastically, to which Damian only smirked. 

“When it matters? Of course. But in this case, watching the fallout will be entertaining and not at all dangerous to your physical safety.” 

Damian and Marinette had been sent to live in Paris a few years back, about a year after Damian had come back to life. Marinette had been far too attached to the twin she had thought she had lost for good, and had nearly driven him crazy with how overprotective she had gotten. Right alongside that, Damian had started to become even more stifled by Bruce’s own protectiveness and distrust of him, so he quit being Robin and they were sent to PAris to try and “recover” from their “trauma” somewhere “safe and peaceful, under the jurisdiction of the JLE.” 

Yeah, that was a great idea. Up until they found out the hard way that the JLE had up and abandoned the Paris headquarters and taken up unofficial residence in England somewhere. And then Hawkmoth showed up. And of course, of fucking course, an old chinese man from the pacifistic organization that acted as a direct foil to the League where they grew up somehow decided that they, out of everyone in Paris, were the best people he could find to wield the power of tiny gods to save the city. 

Sure, he was right, but Damian chewed him a new asshole as soon they met for trusting complete unvetted strangers with the gods of creation and destruction. 

And now Marinette had finally managed to leak to Tim, who then spread the calculated slip of information to Bruce, that Paris had had a supervillain for the past few years and the JLE had been neglecting their jobs. Which turned into Batman setting up a meeting with Ladybug and Chat Noir (Damian had tried to tell everyone his name was Chance Noir, Dark Luck, NOT ‘chat noir,’ since the last thing he needed was to be associated with Selina in any way. Nobody listened, and now he was stuck with being called Chat Noir). They had a lovely discussion about all the shit Hawkmoth did, their lack of resources, and the lack of assistance/straight up refusal to believe their word that came from the JLE. 

Which led to Batman inviting Ladybug to meet the Justice League to debrief on the Paris situation. Damian had been invited as Chat Noir, but had taken the smart path and opted out. Now Marinette had to not only go to the Justice League as Ladybug, but also as Batman's daughter Hummingbird, who was being brought in for consultation along with Damian as Robin. 

“I’m gonna die again,” Marinette continued her catastrophizing, Tikki and Plagg sharing a glance at once another from their spot on her writing desk. “I’m gonna die of total embarrassment. Don’t bother resurrecting me Dami, I’m just gonna die all over again once Dad finds out who we are and kills me.” 

Damian snorted. “Hah. Father killing anything, good one,” he snarked back blandly. “You’ll be fine. Remember, you’re the planner and I’m the one with actual skill. You have the strangest ability when it comes to getting out of situations like these by the skin of your teeth,” Damian grinned at something on the screen of his Switch before continuing. “You’ll be fine. And if you sell me out, I’ll bury you myself.” 

Marinette stuck her tongue out at him. Neither of them wanted their dad to find out that they were LAdybug and Chat noir, especially since they had already explained to him the basics of the source of their powers. They were both certain that Bruce would completely ignore how well they had been handling the situation on their own for almost five years and jump straight to the “my murderous children should not be left with the powers of destruction and creation at their fingertips,” line of thought. Bruce had never trusted them alone before, why now? 

“At least help me, shaqiq?” Marinette asked, walking over and plopping onto the ground next to her bed, so she could look straight into her twin’s bright green eyes. At first, he refused to even look at her, completely unmoved. Marinette hummed mischievously, a habit that was the source of her Gotham codename. “If I go down, I’m taking you with me.” 

Damian finally huffed, scowling. “Fine.” 

He knew better than to doubt her. Marinette always got her way when she decided she was wronged and needed to even the score for something. Always. 

—* — * — * — * — *

Hummingbird. The smallest Bat, by far, and the fastest when it came to natural speed. Hard to spot, with the sole giveaway that a short playful hum could be heard if she thought she had her prey cornered. She was hardly ever wrong. 

She had also been temporarily retired as she and Robin moved to some undisclosed location to get away from the vigilante life for a while. Or so Batman said. And for the most part, aside from the occasional League gathering here or glimpse that they got of the two’s civilian personas if someone visited the manor while they were there, Robin and Hummingbird stayed retired. Heroes who knew them wondered if Robin had finally given up and settled down somehow, if he was even capable of it. And they all speculated that Hummingbird was so scarred from Robin’s death that she wouldn't ever be able to leave his side again, retired or not. 

 Seeing Hummingbird in her navy blue and black uniform, almost identical to her brother’s but for the thick navy blue scarf that covered her neck and lower face, everyone in the Justice League who knew her thought they were right. She stood there, older and only a little taller, never leaving Robin’s side as they traded secretive glances and hand signals only they understood. They didn’t make any attempt to stray from one another’s side. 

But Jon Kent, superboy and Damian’s oldest friend, was of a different mind. He had been by Marinette’s side after Damian died, and by both of theirs when he was brought back. This was not the same terrified dependence he had seen back then. His eyes narrowed. 

The twins were scheming, and nobody else would notice until it was too late. 

Quicker than they could blink, he was by their side with his trademark smile. “Hey guys! Long time no see!” 

They gave the half-kryptonian identical deadpan expressions, sighing in tandem. “You facetimed us last night. And you flew to Paris to visit us last week,” Damian pointed out with a raised eyebrow. “Despite us expressly telling you not to.” 

Jon shrugged. “If I listened to everything you two said all the time, we’d never have any fun. So, excited to meet this Ladybug girl? Dad says that your dad won’t tell him anything about her until she shows up.” 

Hummingbird and Robin traded looks before Marinette answered. “Not really. We see Ladybug in action in Paris all the time—”

“She even saved Marinette from an Akuma who was obsessed with wanting to date her,” Damian interrupted with an insufferable grin. Marinette elbowed him hard, making her brother wince before chuckling at her red face. 

“I could have saved myself just fine! It’s not my fault we have to lay low, or we might get kicked out of Paris for being past vigilantes!” Marinette argued, voice high as she protested how helpless Damian had made her sound. She puffed her cheeks out in annoyance. Damian’s grin widened into a predatory smirk that showed off teeth.

“Oh? What about that one time that Tsurugi got akumatized, and Chat Noir had to save you because she wanted to duel you for the right to date me and you were cornered?” 

Marinette growled, throwing up her hands in frustration before smacking Damian’s shoulder angrily. He only laughed at her. “I’m leaving! Come find me when Ladybug finishes explaining the things we already know!” with that, a fuming and embarrassed Hummingbird stormed out of the room. 

“Huh,” Flash remarked, leaning against the wall. “She looks a lot better than the last time I saw her. And she actually left your immediate vicinity. Willingly,” he remarked to Robin, who glared at the speedster. 

“It’s been almost six years. If you think my sister is weak enough to be that thoroughly encumbered by the past for so long, you are greatly underestimating her,” he looked around to see almost all of the gathered League members staring at him. He grit his teeth and looked over at his father. “When is this woman going to arrive, anyway? You’d think she would actually be on time.” 

Just then, a portal opened in the middle of the room and Ladybug walked through. Quickly shedding the brown costume that allowed her to teleport in, she was left in just her black and red-spotted combat suit. Seeing as they finally found out how to alter the costumes the Kwami gave them, Ladybug’s hair now sat in a braided bun on the crown of her head and her costume was made to look more like Nightwing’s with the ladybug symbol on her upper chest and between her shoulder blades on her back, with black gloves that reached up to her elbows and black knee-high boots with red stripes up the sides. 

The brightly colored heroine smiled, seeming to light up the room with cheer that nearly put Jon to shame (it took her awhile to perfect that particular smile. She actually based it off Jon himself, and Damian was impressed by how accurate she had been able to make it over time. Not that he would say as much out loud). 

That was when Diana started choking on thin air, and Damian and Marinette both realized that they had overlooked something rather major. 

Hippolyta had been a Ladybug. Diana had met Tikki. Diana knew how to see past Tikki’s glamour. 

At first, Ladybug tried to play it off. Maybe Diana would catch on and help her out. So she walked over, holding her hand out for Wonderwoman to shake and putting on another wide smile for good measure. 

“Oh my Kwamii! It is so good to finally meet you, Wonderwoman, Tikki told me so much about you and your mother! Would you like to talk later—”

“Marinette Wayne, how in Zeus’ name did you become the new Ladybug?” Wonderwoman instantly yelled, making Marinette wilt. Damian tried backing away slowly, only for Diana’s eyes to then shoot over to him and narrow dangerously. “And you! I knew I felt something weird, but now I can pinpoint it. You are wielding the Black Cat! One of you explain what is going on. Now.” 

Ladybug and Robin instantly looked away, getting ready to make a quick escape right as their father walked up behind Robin, putting a firm hand on his shoulders. As always when Batman smiled, it sent a shiver down everyone’s spine. Marinette gulped a little. 

“I agree. Marinette, I forgot to tell you that we changed the locations of the League security cameras last night,” shit they were so busted. Bruce must have suspected them of something from the very beginning, stupid world’s greatest detective instincts— “But now that we have confirmed that my suspicions were correct, we can save that discussion for later. First, let’s debrief on the Paris situation like we agreed. Then, you two will explain why you decided not to tell me while you help each other clean the entire Batcave tonight.” 

Damian didn’t open his hand for the entire meeting. He and Marinette made eye contact as soon as everyone sat down for a suddenly very uneasy debrief, silently agreeing that they would not let their father take away their Miraculous. They finally had names and reputations of their own, away from the Batclan and their father’s influence. They had learned more about themselves and what they were capable of in those past years as Miraculous wielders than in all the years of the rest of their lives combined. They wouldn’t give it up, not even for Bruce’s approval. 

But when they got back to the Manor and began cleaning up the batcave as they had been ordered, they were surprised when Bruce made no mention of taking their jewelry back at all. And he stayed up with them, silently reviewing things on the Batcomputer as they cleaned. It could almost be considered family bonding. 

By the time the twins were done cleaning the sun was about to rise, and finally their father spoke up for the first time since they had begun their punishment chore. 

“I watched days worth of your Paris battles before going out to meet Ladybug and Chat Noir in person,” he said without ever turning around from his spot at the computer. “I was impressed. I still am. The teamwork was flawless, and the Parisian heroes never used deadly force. They even did their best to provide emotional support to the victims who were akumatized. I thought for sure at least one of you two would have been victims yourself, with all that you’ve been through. Anything can be a trigger for you, anything can make you vulnerable to Hawkmoth,” Bruce paused to take a sip of coffee. He didn’t have to look at his children’s reflections in the face of the Batcomputer to know they were drinking in every word he said. He did anyway, allowing a small smile that they couldn’t see to form on his lips. 

“I scoured through every akuma attack one by one, trying to find the one where one or both of you were the ones possessed. But I only found more reasons to be impressed by the heroes instead. By the time I was done looking through every scrap of video I could find, I had a feeling I knew who you were. Hearing your voices in person cemented it further, but I wanted video proof. So, knowing that Marinette would have forgotten about agreeing to accompany me to a JL meeting, I asked Ladybug to debrief us.” 

“You had us from the start,” Marinette sighed, shoulders slumping. But Damian said nothing, eyes wide as he picked up on the nuances of what Bruce was saying that Marinette was too tired to catch on to. 

“I’m proud of you two.” 

Then, even Marinette froze. The twins had identical expressions of shock on their faces, and Bruce finally turned around to look at them properly. For a long while, the three of them only made silent eye contact as dozens of emotions flew through the air silently, but understood. Then Damian and Marinette straightened up just and silently. Damian nodded to his father, Marinette gave him a vulnerable little smile, and then they both backed out and went to head to sleep. 

And once they were gone, Bruce sighed in content. Seems his meet-the-Justice-League plan worked out perfectly. He had finally managed to say something right to his two most troublesome children, for the first time. He leaned back in his chair, gazing up at the dark bat-infested cave ceiling as one more tiny grin played on his face, a little melancholy this time. 

Guess they never needed him to help them find their inner hero, after all. They had become even better at the whole hero thing than he was, and all on their own. Bruce closed his eyes, not noticing when Alfred draped a blanket over his body and left the Cave with a soft chuckle. 

--*--*--*--*--*

This sucked, but I wanted to give you guys something. So. here you go I guess? 

[aesthbaby]

Ghost

Summary: Do you remember the episode Demonology where we learned of Emily’s past? What if I told you, you were apart of it. After years of silence on her end, you end up meeting her again.

Pairing: Emily Prentiss x Fem!Reader

Prompt: here

Warnings: Cursing | Sadness | Typos

Word Count:

Masterlist

An: Dedicated to my hundredth follower. Ahhhh I'm too hype about this! I also made a slight change to the prompt but everything else is the same :)  Anon, I hope you enjoy.

Indignation

The screaming crawls up the walls of her oversized, child hood home to shake her ear drums. The thunder only adds fuel to the fire that is the rage possessed by both Prentiss’ as they continue their screaming match.

“Don’t you dare walk away when I’m talking to you!” Elizabeth’s voice matches the rain. The way she stomps behind her daughter looks almost comical.

“Back off mother.” She mumbles this more to herself than her mother.

She stops walking, planting her feet firmly on the Brazilian Chestnut flooring. “I will not ask you again.” She comes to a stop, takes a breath, and slowly turns to her mother. Not meeting her eyes, of course, because it’d hurt too much to see the hate in her eyes. “Look at me.” The mother growls. She slowly moves to meet her mothers eyes and finds nothing but rage there; energy matched to the thunder and rain outside. “You will not see that-” The derogatory term gets caught up in her throat.

Taking a step towards the elder, “What?” Daring to ask the question to which she already knows the answer. “What do you want to say mother?” Her jaw tightens, a sign that Emily knows all too well. “Spit it out.” Its taking everything in her not to raise her voice again and spew the word out for her mother.

Elizabeth takes a breath of her own before replying. “You are not to see that girl again or so help me, I will make sure she goes back to where she came from.” Before Emily could object, she speaks again. “That is final Emily.” Her voice holds strong, and suddenly the storm ceases its assault. 

All is quiet in the Prentiss house yet the tension remains; so thick that you could cut it with a knife.

Disregard

The next morning you arrive to school earlier than usual, but for good reason. Some random college hoodie wrapped loosely around your torso and a dainty neck tucked under it. Your school uniform has never fit you quite right because of how late in the year you transferred, you know...left overs. Phone is going absolutely crazy in your shirt pocket but now isn't the time, you’re looking for somebody. You’re looking for her. Mr. Ricci’s voice can be heard on your left, telling a group of guys its time for class. Emily...where the hell are you?

As the day progresses you still see no sign of the brunette until now. “Emily!” Running up to her you deliver a swift punch to her shoulder. “Where the hell have you been?” When her eyes meet yours they puffy, like she’s been crying. “Em- I-”

“First of all, ouch. Secondly, I can’t right now.” She turns to walk off with her lunch in hand, but you quickly pull her back by her elbow.

“You ‘can’t’ right now? What the hell is wrong with you?” Its taking everything in you not to become overtly emotional. “And where have you been?”

“Y/n I’m sorry but I really can’t right now.” She pulls away from your grip. Leaving you more confused than before.

You scuff at her wording. “You never calls me by my first name...” Its always been her thing, starting with a joke about how she has another friend by the same name as you so she had to call you something else. The next day was the same, avoiding you at all costs.

But it didn’t stop there.

It felt as though you were left on a physical manifestation of ‘read.’ Her name with the red heart emoji attached, did not pop up on your phone for what seemed to be months but in reality it had only been a few weeks. If she were to simply pick up the phone you would have been able to tell her about your unforeseen departure time. Due to sudden changes in international studies, you had to leave and the academy needed their student back. The one of which you exchange places with in January. Tears spring to your eyes at the thought of leaving. Not only are you leaving her, but also leaving this city you got to call home.

Sunny days always seem to appear at the wrong time, your departure day. She’s not here to see you off, hasn’t been around for a while. Can you really blame her? She doesn’t even know you’re leaving because she wont pick up the fucking phone. It doesn’t matter anymore, your time is up and so is her’s. A line of black and white kittens sprint across the cobblestone streets and that right there is what makes you break down in tears. Seeing the delicate kittens run after a mouse while tripping over their own feet. Random yellow flowers peaking through the stone which you’ve never known the actual name of. That one girl in Chem that would bake cookies for the class on Fridays. Your host dad taking you to his favorite café that served an increasing number of Cuban smokers. Going to eat gelato after homeroom with that one guy who would always make Golden Girls references. Then there was Emily, the girl that gave you a dainty gold necklace for valentines day. The girl that got a random jock to stop harassing you. The person whose lap you’d lay in on Saturday mornings at the park, is the same person who randomly started to ignore you. Maybe you could have fixed things with her if you had more time. You were supposed  to have until June but suddenly everything shifted and all you were told is that you needed to come home, promptly. You couldn’t wait for her any longer, not even sure why you thought she’d come in the first place. Casting one last glance over your shoulder before stepping into the buzzing airport.

At least meet me half way.

Hereafter

"I don’t think so.” You laugh at your friend’s proposition to set you up on a blind date. “I am absolutely content with the way I choose to live my life.” Shifting a bit on the new couch that hasn’t been broken in, resulting in the stiff cushions.

He lets out this weird scuffing noise. “No you’re not. Remember last weekend when we tried to pull an all-nighter but your sleep deprived brain betrayed you?” At your nonchalant shrug, he continues. “You started rambling about just wanting to find some well educated, fun loving, female in this world full of bureaucratic straight men. Your words, not mine.” You throw a pillow at him but he swiftly doges it. “But you couldn’t have said it better.” These recent years have been a series of unfortunate dates that have ended in you lying about having to leave early for something.

“Don’t you have a girlfriend you should be getting home to?”

“Not tonight, I’m all yours. Apparently she has her knitting circle tonight.”

“That's what you get for dating an older woman.” 

“Its a five year age difference! What is wrong with you people?”

You hold your hands up in defense. “Nothing, as long as you’re both legal and she’s good to you, its fine by me.”

“Shut up!” He screeches. “Oh shit, don’t you have a meeting in the morning?”

“Yes sir.” He stands to take your glasses and plates in the kitchen but you object. “Leave it,” At his confused expression, you continue. “Cleaning helps me relax so I figured I’ll wake up early so I can do that and reduce my stress levels by at least ten percent.”

“Dude, you’re seriously weird.”

“Say another bad thing about me and I'm sending you home.”

Throwing him a few pillows from the hallway closet and a comforter just for him to scream, “Its too hot in this cottage core apartment!”

Its not even cottage core themed?? Its just cozy with a plant or two. Am I expected to live in an ice cold home? I feel like he’s just saying this because I’m gay.

Your prepared outfit hands on the back of your bedroom door, mocking you. Making you reconsider the entire thing and simply not go but it feels as though you’d regret it if you didn’t. Maybe not, who knows?

And with that as your final though, you drift off to sleep.

You wake at the amazing time of 6 A.M to see your guest gone with a note on the couch:

I cleaned up the mess from last night and I also did the dishes in your sink. Not sure how u slept through all of that...I made a fruit salad for ur breakfast and a normal one for lunch.

Good luck with your meeting!

And one of those old fashioned emoticons at the bottom corner. Idiot.

You eat the food he left from the fridge, brush your teeth with the news playing in the background, and continue on with the normal morning routine.

Gathering your lunch and the little items you feel like you’d need, phone, charger, paper work, and keys; you know, the works. Finally heading out to your destination with nothing but ambition, you run into a slight problem. 

Overlapping breakfast with an old friend of yours. “Hey, babe, I am so sorr-”

“Absolutely not, I don’t want to hear your excuses.” The positive voice rings through the phone like velvet sheets after a cold shower. “You missed our reservation!” Have to admit hearing them whine is pretty entertaining. “You had one job. One!” You guys met some years ago over some random online forum, arguing over some random movie. You don’t talk as much as you’d like but breakfast is always on the menu--mostly in February.

“Quick question, am I allowed to apologize?”

There’s a beat of silence on the other end, “Yes you may, but only in fruit baskets and coffee.”

“I got you, next time though. I’m on my way to something right now.”

“Something...” In comes the teasing undertone. “Does this ‘something’ have a name?”

Bursting into a fit of laughter at what is implied and replying, “Definitely not, its a work thing.”

“Speaking of work, I have to go. Ciao!”

Just in time to end the call, you pull into the designated parking deck from the email. Going through all of the security procedures was hell but blatantly necessary; the rest was gravy. Floating through the rest of the building gave you a slightly stressful feel because of all the men walking around with perfect suits and casting no glances your direction. When the glass doors labeled BAU appear, you take a deep breath and walk in with confidence. Taking in the buzzing sound of agents at work all around you. Agent Hotcher’s office is glaringly obvious: higher up than the rest, perfect overview of the hive, and in direct eye sight of the entryway doors.

Delivering a swift knock to the office door you hear a faint invitation from the inside. Walking in with a smile and straight back you are greeted with a man in a dark navy blue suit and a stoic look to attached to him. It first starts with the small talk of your experience, early life, skill sets, and what not.

“Agent Hotchner, might I speak out of line for a moment.” He gives you a skeptical look before nodding. “I understand the nature of this meeting but I am not completely sure why it was conducted.” His furrowed brown is not a good sign, making you correct your structure a bit. “Right, well,” God his stare is fucking intense. “What I mean to ask is, why am I here?”

That was bold.

“Agent, are you not aware that this is a Career Analysis Assessment?” As it slowly sinks in an O-shape forms with your mouth. Now you feel like a complete idiot in front of this prestigious, tight suited, man. “You were unaware? Its fine if you were,” You let out a sigh at the confirmation. “I have a tendency to write my emails with an excessive amount of four syllable words so one could see where the confusion originated.” You let out a nervous laugh at the realization that this is basically a job interview.

“I see that you’ve spent time studying abroad.” Indicated by the recommendations from your Italian Psychology teacher. “Why not join the CIA?”

“Dare I say, they make me nervous?” He cracks a small, very subtle, smile at the admission.

“What made you want to leave Human Resources?”

“I got tired of analyzing decisions with nothing but dead bodies and messy crimes and having my primal focus be the agents and not the victims or perpetrators. Using what I’ve learned as material for agents in training when I could have prevented it from happening.”

“Well said, but I need to be completely transparent with you.” This can’t be good. “I will admit that I have serious reservations about adding a Human Resources officer to my team.”

Shit let me stop him before this spirals. He thinks I’m a spy. “Sir, with all do respect, I have no intentions of being a bureaucratic spy. I’d also like to point out that I wasn’t that high on the HR totem pole to the point where I had an explicit say on what happens to agents, who is hire, fired, or how they’re trained. I analyzed and compromised while expressing my findings to an unbiased extent. If I wanted to be a spy I would have joined the CIA.” Besides, Head Quarter’s is the one that does all of that internal investigation stuff, not HR.

He doesn’t say anything or make any sudden movements for a good minute. I fucked up. That spy line was too far. “I’d like to offer you a position on this team, so long as you can start immediately.”

“Yes, of course I can! I don’t have much office supplies besides a pen or two and-”

“Its fine,” He stands from his seat and straightens the dark blazer. “I’ll have one of my agents show you around.”

From across the bullpen you spot a familiar blonde. “Oh my god!” The file in her hand falls to the floor. “Its you!” She practically squeals.

“Penelope, I didn’t know you work here.” You give your old friend a tight, unapologetic hug. She said she worked as a tech analysis but you always assumed it was for an activism group or a tech firm, not the FBI out of all things. Despite having such interesting jobs, you never talk about work with each other. She knows you work for the government but not which. Although knowing how good she is at uncovering people’s secrets, there’s a good chance she already knew you work for the FBI too.

“What are you doing here? Like physically here. I thought you were in Florida.”

“I have to get back, can you take care of Agent Y/L/N for me?” Hotchner says before rushing off without an answer.

And there she goes with the snooping. “Actually, I left the Florida office and went to California.”

“Oh.” Her face twists a bit. “And now you’re here?”

“I thought you were the woman behind the curtains, the all knowing.”

“And wonderful!” She points with her perfectly painted finger.

In comes a slim man with a messenger back, making a click in your mind. “Now where have I seen him before...” Turning slightly to follow his trail.

“That’s our resident genius Dr. Spencer Reid.”

Unbelievable. “He’s twelve.” The young agent’s head snaps toward you and Penelope, “Does he have super human hearing too?” She introduces you to the Doctor who is, as expected, socially awkward in many ways. A man named David Rossi of whom you’ve met at least once during a few Bureau seminars; last you heard he had rejoined the BAU after retirement. Jennifer Jareau is gorgeous with a nurturing nature about her, she immediately recognizes your name from exchanged paperwork but that’s about it. The introductions are brief, everyone seems to be busy with their own things. “Penelope your team is kind of small.” You quietly mention to her.

“Oh!” Guess the realization that two people are missing, finally clicks in her head. She starts walking in the direction of a staircase so you automatically follow her. “This is Derek Morgan.” Standing in front of a round table is a tall man with a really toned body. “Derek, this is Agent Y/n L/n from Human Resources.” His eyebrow arches up in suspicion.

“Oh no I’m not here for anything bad, I’ve actual been transferred into the BAU. Working behind a desk and watching as others do the work I can’t, wasn’t working out for me.” Definitely won’t trust me until I save his life or something. “I’ve heard of you, one of the Academy trainers has shown a few videos of you.” He smirks at the implied compliment and finally holds his hand out for you to shake.

“Where’s...” Pen trails while looking around.

“Oh she’s getting coffee.” The darker man points behind himself.

“Who’s getting coffee?”

Reconciliation

Maybe we wouldn’t be so short handed if they sprung for better coffee. Emily thought to herself while stirring the flavorless, dark liquid. What if they attach a coffee shop to the building? Imagine how much money the shop would make off of overworked agents. But then I feel like we’d start developing a true addiction to this stuff. Her thoughts are interrupted by the approach of foot steps. She meets Derek’s figure and smiles at the resident goofball of the BAU. Followed by Penelope’s pink centralized outfit with feathers. Then there’s you, just as beautiful as the last time you saw each other. If not more. Your hair shines amongst the florescent lights, paired with the perfectly tailored outfit and jewelry. The same eyes that would brighten her day as they met. An almost unnoticeable bounce in you walk, same as it were years ago. As you step towards her there is a flash of gold on your wrist that sends a ping to Emily’s heart, its the necklace I gave you in high school.

Intersect

You would have know about Emily’s transfer here from a few years ago, had her paperwork gone through the HR department but apparently it went straight to the top because this is definitely a surprise. Once you realize its actually her you stop dead in your tracks. Can’t be.

“Y/n,” She stutters out your name in disbelief. “What are you doing here?”

“Emily, I work here.” Ripping the band-aid off like this is an every day encounter; seeing your unofficial ex who you were never actually with in the first place but had the same characteristics as a high school couple. Yeah...that.

She also blurted out a ‘no you don’t’ before Garcia interrupted. “How do you two know each other?”

You both snapped your heads to her simultaneously. “We don’t.” Also said that part at the same time.

“Right.” She drags. “I’m sensing some unresolved tension...”

“What are-” Em tries to object.

“So we’re going to go.” The tech analysis grabs the sleeve of the darker man and practically sprints off in the opposite direction. Morgan having a dumbfounded look on his face.

It feels like you’re at a stalemate, who will make the first move. What will the emotions be? Are they going to fly? Because I’d like to throw a few verbal punches her way. Who does that to someone? I thought I was over it but clearly the wound is still open. Great now watch her blame me for X, Y, and Z,

“I’ve missed you.” She barely whispers, sounding a bit broken yet insincere. Its like she’s detaching herself from the narrative. So unexpected that you almost think you’re imagining this. Why would she say that? This is not the Emily you remember.

Anger bubbles up in your throat ready to unleash upon her entirety. Instead of bursting into flames right on the spot, in the middle of your new place of employment you take a deep breath. Words of disbelief  dance on your lips before speaking. “You did not.” She tilts her head like a curious puppy. Who am I even talking to?

“What do you mean?” And just like that she’s whisked away by a guy in a suit of whom you do not recognize. Your jaw clinches in a desperate attempt to keep your cool, wondering what the hell is going on.

Realization

Besides the surprise of seeing Emily, your first day went great. Everyone kept checking up on you and you couldn’t tell if it was because they were trying to be friendly, excited to have a new teammate, or nervous of your background. “She used to work for the FBI Human Resources Branch.” You heard the skinny one tell Morgan when they thought you weren’t listening.

JJ and Penelope invited you out for drinks but all you really wanted to do was lay in your bed with a face mask and a bag of chips. Waving a farewell to the blonde women and head to your car, but a few feet away you feel a presence. You quickly loop around in search of the energy with your hand on the top of your gun. “Woah woah.” Emily holds her hands up in surrender.

At the realization of who it is you take a breath and clip your gun back in place. You give her a “what the hell look” before straightening your outfit.

“Were you going to shoot me?”

She’s met with wide eyes from your end. “Maybe?! Who sneaks up on someone with a gun?”

“I didn’t ‘sneak’ up on you.”

“Emily, you wear all black and walk like a feather. What were you expecting?” The buried anger is starting showing through.

“Okay,” She does a weird hand movement that kind of looks like she’s trying to calm you down. “I’m sorry. I just thought we could talk.”

“Talk...” You’re not really following.

“Yes, I’d like to talk.”

“Emily what are you asking? I’m lost.”

She take a moment to figure it out before answering. “For a second chance, I’m asking for another shot.”

You uncross your arms at the admission, letting them lazily fall beside you. “Em- I-” She can’t be asking what I think she is. “Its been years. More than a decade has passed since-” The words suddenly die on your lips

“I know,” And it looks like there’s a slight glimmer in her eyes, implying the presence of suppressed tears. “I’d just like to explain.”

“Explain?” You bite, tasting the bitter flavor of annoyance.

“Yes, I at least owe you that.”

And that’s how you ended up here, with her. In a cozy, minimalistic loft at nine in the afternoon with a coffee table separating the two of you.

“I’m sorry.” Was the first thing to break the silence, and this time it actually sounded sincere. “If I could have explained everything to you back then, I would have.”

You lean forward, closer to her and push the rather large vase off to the side so she has to be vulnerable with you. Nothing to help her hide from herself. At her confused face you lean back in your seat and nod for her to continue.

“My mother was always a difficult woman and although she has gotten better over the years, things were at their worst when she found out how much time I had been spending with you.” The brunette takes a minute before admitting the next part. “She was responsible for your early departure. I tried to stop her, give you more time but she’s relentless.” She waits for your reaction but when met with nothing, she continues. “She threatened me by putting our connection on the line, which in retrospect I now realize was impossible to save. She had already made calls to get you out of the country by the time I could sever what we had. I never wanted to hurt you or end what we shared.”

“And what did we share, Emily?”

Her tongue darts from between her lips, doing that weird little biting thing she’s always done since we’ve known each other. It sparks something in you that you haven't felt in a while. “I think you know. The fact that you still wear the necklace I gave you, bracelet, means you never really forgot.”

“I liked it where I could see it, but Em you could have called, texted even.” 

“I couldn’t I was scared. Then after you left I started to distance myself from everyone and everything was really going downhill.”

“How so?”

“I got mixed up with peer pressure and boys.” This doesn’t sound good. “At one point I did anything I could to fit in.”

“What does that mean?” There’s a moment when a tear wells up on one of her eyes, but not dropping. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.”

“I-” She tries to speak but nothing comes out. “I couldn’t tell my mother and the church wasn’t happy with my actions.” It suddenly dawns on you, like a smack in the face. You want to make her stop and just hold her but this needs to come out. “I couldn’t call you because it would hurt too much. I hated myself at that moment more than I ever have.”

“And you haven’t dated since?”

She sniffles and lets out a little laugh at that. “God no, I’ve dated people but I haven't dated another female since. It felt wrong, like I was replacing you or something.”

“You owe me nothing. You were just trying to protect me and I see that now.”

“I knew better, its been so long and when I heard you joined the academy I-”

“Wait, you knew and didn’t say anything?”

“Y/n I couldn’t bring myself to do anything other that attempt to move on.” Silence fills the room and its not the comforting kind. Its the tense, I need to do something, kind.

“Do you feel anything?” You dare to ask.

“What do you mean?”

“You know what I mean. Were your feelings lost in transit?”

“They froze the day you left, and thawed the day I saw you again. Today.”

“So its not over.”

She appears to contemplate your statement. “No, its not over. We have a chance to start over.”

What now?

.｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*★*･ ･*･'･*:..:*･゜ﾟ･*☆*:. .｡.:*☆

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[tarithenurse]

Spark - 6

Fandom: Enn Enn no Shouboutai / Fire Force. Pairing: Shinmon Benimaru x fem!reader. Content: Denial. A glimpse into the past and into some hearts. Lack of proofing. A/N: Et voilá. Feel free to ASK or reblog for tag – in fact: always reblog <3 Thanks to those who have already <3

6. Ember

...   Benimaru   ...

Wet drops spray the face of the young captain of Company Seven, startling him back to the present where his friend and mentor waits. Konro is meticulously wiping his hands clean of soapy suds, the melancholic eyes hardened with stubbornness.

“What?” Benimaru sighs.

The senior takes his time to clean up the last thing in the kitchen before making them both a cup of tea, and even if Benimaru is getting impatient he knows better than to nag.

“You worry,” Konro finally states.

Yes. “Don’t know what you mean.”

“I’ve been trying to get your attention for several minutes. You’re worrying ‘bout [Y/N]...you don’t like that she’s on her own with Haijima and the Temple after her.”

“We don’t know if they are.”

The risk is huge, though, as rumours are circulating – and not just in Asakusa either: a few “leisurely” visits to bars in neighbouring districts had quickly payed off in the form of whispered gossip. And yeah, the people Benimaru had overheard were all civilians but his distrust of the governing bodies fed into what some would consider conspiracy theories.

“...and I don’t worry.”

Simply smiling knowingly, the older man sips his tea and allows the silence to become the answer. Faint notes of jasmine and camellia cocoon them in an attempt to create a fragile, peaceful bubble. Under normal circumstances that would work. This time, however, one of them men remains jittery, his mind losing a battle against unwanted concerns.

“Why would I even worry? You’ve no reason to think that.”

Konro tries to smother a laugh. “I’ve known you since you were a kid, Beni,” he snickers, “and in all that time I’ve never seen anyone get you as riled up as she does.”

“That’s ‘cause she’s infuriating!”

And she is. Uncooperative, stubborn, reckless, unpredictable, strange, intriguing, resourceful, charming (to those she likes). Fuck. Loath to admit it, the captain has to accept that the list of adjectives would be filled with increasingly positive traits if he were to continue trying to define the woman.

It hardly matters, though. It’s been almost a week and despite the rumours flourishing beyond Asakusa, there hasn’t been a single tangible bit of evidence that [Y/N] is still roaming free somewhere. Maybe, she’s taken his warning seriously and done a proper job at hiding this time, but the risk is great that she’s been caught by either of the authorities for testing.

They’d see her as a blank slate. Someone who clearly has some pyrochinetic ability latent, waiting to be triggered and possibly shaped to fit the needs of the situation in which it arises. She’d be an experiment. A test subject bombarded with horrors until either Haijima or the Temple accomplish what they want...or dispose of her as a failure.

“Listen,” Konro tries to appease, “I don’t want her falling into their hands either and I’ve got both eyes and ears open. Maybe we’ll find her in time.”

...  Reader   ...

Staring at the paper in your hands, the writing blurs in comparison to the picture of two men with attempted smiles – one of them is holding a framed photograph of a pair of sisters, the other father clenches a plushy. Even if the scene is monochrome you know the singed, floppy ear of the toy rabbit is purple. It’s the stiff way they sit that call forth tears which you angrily wipe away. It’s their eyes focused beyond the camera, at whomever choreographed the whole thing from the way they sit to the text which you still haven’t read. You know it’s not the men’s words anyways, despite what the text claims.

“W-where’d y’get this?”

You hate how shaky your voice is. Hate the slight wince that not even the Joker can hide.

“Let’s just say I’ve got...friends in the right places.” The hesitation is obvious to anyone with trust issues, but you decide not to dig into it. “Don’t worry...daddies are still at home, nice and safe and under surveillance in case you show up.”

How? You’d purposely stayed away for more than a year after having seen them through the anguish of rebuilding a life with both daughters gone. Staying away from the neighbourhood and all the places you knew they might frequent...and still they’d been dragged into a manhunt without knowing half of what was going on. Or do they? No. Haijima and the Temple would tell them a lie, that much is clear from the few lines seeping into your consciousness from below the picture. ‘Kidnapped’, ‘vulnerable’, ‘return her home’, ‘reward’.

“Tell me,” your strange rescuer puffs, “why are you so keen on not getting caught by them? They could help you with your powers.”

You suppose it’s a logical question, one that aligns with the plan you’d come up with once the initial panic and concern had faded away during the first weeks alone:

Squeezed in between the dumpsters, you could only see glimpses of the third special fire force company’s battle against the infernals. You could hear the burning screams; wailing, high pitched, cursing the living while craving their souls. One by one, the fiery beings were extinguished. Latôm.

But your legs were shaking too much for you to crawl out of your hiding spot and all you could do was sit and try to breathe. In and out. Thoughts swirled in your head, obscured by a different kind of smoke, and it was the dry voice of one from the third company that brought your attention back to the world:

“What a shame,” he complained in a hush to another, “I was sure it would work this time.”

“More tests,” was the curt answer, “the more we discover and get control over, the closer we’ll get.”

The words held little meaning to a scared teenager but you understood – no, you wanted to think – they were trying to find a way to stop infernals from appearing.

“The faster they combust, the sooner we can find a new Atolla. Burn the place down.”

“Until then...we managed to get those,” the second consoled icily and you saw his shadow point to two children.

Frightened, crying snot so hard that one of them is hiccup’ing, it was clear they didn’t want to be a part of whatever the men were talking about. The first man, wearing a high hat and glasses over a bird-like mask, bend to look at them, giving you the impression that he might as well have been scrutinizing the craftsmanship of a woodworker rather than human beings.

“They won’t be missed?” he inquired.

It seemed to amuse his friend. “Missed? Who’d miss sticky little maggots like these? Besides, it’s for the Cause.”

A few days later, you saw the red-eyed mother handing out homemade pamphlets with description and picture of one of the children.

A week after that, you saw the kid holding on tight to a hand as they walked down a busy street. Not tight enough, though. The boy cried out in distress at being abandoned at first until the confused sounds morphed into screams of agony as flames sprouted from his eyes, arms, body. As you fled the scene, you could have sworn you saw the masked man retreat into an alley.

“I don’t know much about them, but I don’t trust them. They hurt kids. People.”

The Joker pins you down with a long stare of the crazy eye. “Let’s hope you never find out for yourself.”

[albertasunrise]

Chance - Chapter 7

Summary: Working as an ER doctor, you don’t get much of a chance to meet new men and you’d never imagined that you’d meet your soulmate at work.

Warnings: Fluff, Smut 18+

Pairings: Frankie Morales/ Reader

~

Frankie had never been so nervous in his life. The boys had decided to throw a barbecue to celebrate you and him being together a year and someone was coming that you had yet to meet. It was all part of an elaborate plan that Frankie had started working on a month or so back but now that it was happening he was terrified. Things had been so good lately. You had moved in with him and even received a promotion at work. Things were great and the two of you were unbelievably happy so he really didn't want that to end. The party was starting to heat up as you walked through the front door, Sophie and her girlfriend in tow and as you make your way outside you're greeted with your usual bear hug from Benny before Sophia hobbles into your arms.

‘Hello baby girl, I missed you today.’ You say softly, grinning as she gives you a sloppy kiss on the lips.

‘So this is the famous Doc.’ Comes a voice you’ve never heard and you turn to look at its owner.

There, in the flesh, was a man you’d only ever seen pictures of and heard stories about. He was darker than Frankie, sporting salt and pepper hair that suited him well and a smile that was genuine and warm.

‘And that must make you Pope.’ You reply, allowing him to pull you into a hug ‘I’ve heard a lot about you.’ You finish as you wink at the boys behind him ‘Guys you know Sophie, this is her girlfriend Diana. Diana this is Benny, Will, Frankie, Pope and lastly, this little princess is Sophia.’ You finish as you bounce her in your arms.

‘It’s lovely to meet you all.’ She says shyly, giving them all a wave.

‘Right well food its almost ready. Beer and Wine's in the cooler. Make yourselves at home.’ States Will as he claps his hands and heads back to the grill.

‘How was your day?’ Asks Frankie sweetly as he gives you a kiss, giggling at his daughters protest at him not giving her one too.

‘Yeah wasn’t too bad today.’ You answer ‘Better now I’m here.’

It didn’t take long for everyone to start laughing and joking as conversation flowed. Even Diana relaxed and got involved, getting on particularly well with Benny. As everyone enjoyed themselves it allowed your mind to wander. Ben noticed that you were lost in your thoughts, and he knew what those thoughts were about. You and he had become practically inseparable over the last year, gossiping about anything from work to the girls he picks up at his fights. You’d come to him with something yesterday that you didn’t know what to do about, something that after a few tears and a mild anxiety attack he had talked some sense into you. Everything would be okay. Food was eaten and then everyone settled around the fire pit in the garden, the sun painting the sky in an array of colours as it started to fall.

‘So did you crazy kids get each other presents?’ Asks Benny, wiggling his eyebrows at you both.

‘We said we wouldn’t.’ You reply with a shrug ‘Got you a card though.’ You finish as you look at Frankie.

‘I got you a card too.’ He replies, handing a large envelope to you.

You hand him his and go about opening yours, noting out the corner of your eye that he’s watching you.

‘You going to open yours?’

‘I will in a sec.’ He says excitedly ‘I want to see your face.’

You roll your eyes at him before pulling out the card, giggling at the image on the front. It was a rough sketch of Leiah and Han Solo holding hands, she’s telling him that she loves him and he is saying that famous like ‘I know.’ You open it and a folded sheet of paper falls out which you grab and hold to one side as you read what he wrote, smiling at the soppy words that he tried to hard to make neat. Placing the card down you open the paper and your face scrunches in confusion when you see that it’s a form. You glance at him and he nods at you so you look down at the form again, eyes widening when you realise what it is.

‘You want me to adopt Sophia?’ You ask, eyes locking on his.

‘You’ve been an amazing mum to her the last year, even id that's not what you were trying to be.’ He starts, smiling sweetly at you ‘She calls you Mumma so why not make that official.’

‘Fran-’ You choke as you speak, a shaking hand covering your mouth as you cry tears of complete joy.

‘You don’t have to if you don’t want to. It’s completely up to you.’ He states, taking your hand in his ‘No pressure baby.’

‘Of course, I will.’ You manage to say, letting out a happy sob as you smile at him ‘You going to open yours now?’

‘Impatient.’ He says with a wink, poking out his tongue as he opens his envelope.

He chuckles at the image, you being on the same wavelength as him when you’d bought his card.

‘Without me, you’d be Solo... Really?’ He chuckles, rolling his eyes at the cheese as you shrug your shoulders.

‘Open it.’

When he does his eyes grow even wider than yours had. Your heart pounds in your chest as you wait for him to speak. To say something. You note that everyone else is looking at him with intense curiosity. Everyone but Ben.

‘What is it?’ Asks Pope, chuckling at his friend's expression.

Finally, Frankie looks up at you, his expression hard to read in the low light of the evening.

‘Really?’ He asks, his tone hopeful.

‘Yeah.’

‘Really what??’ Exclaims Will, his tone a little impatient.

‘I’m pregnant.’ You announce, Frankie, turning the card in his hand to reveal the sonogram stuck inside.

He’s on his feet in the blink of an eye, scooping you into his arms and kissing you deeply as he now sobs with joy. Everyone around the fire cheering as the two of you share a moment, gazing into each other’s eyes as you soak one another in.

‘You happy?’ You ask as he lowers back to your feet.

‘Ecstatic.’ He replies, kissing you again ‘Well I guess now is a really good time to do this then.’

‘Do what?’ You ask as you give him a bemused look.

You don’t see his hand reach into his pocket, all you see is him lowering himself down so that he is on one knee and the reality of what’s happening hits you.

‘You are the best thing to happen to me since Fia was born.’ He starts, holding your hand as he struggles to keep his voice from wobbling ‘We have been through hell together. You have had to endure so much, taking care of me and a baby that wasn’t yours when I came out of hospital. You have been so selfless. I knew pretty much from the first conversation we had that you were the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. So will you make me the luckiest man on the planet and marry me?’ He finishes as he reveals a beautiful ring that had been clutched in his hand the whole time.

You can’t speak, you can only nod as he stands up to put the ring on your finger and everyone cheers. You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him into a bruising kiss, the two of you smiling against each other's lips as everyone starts to chant before you tell them to keep it down in case they wake-up Sophia. The party continues well into the early hours of the morning, everyone more or less crashing where they fall and you groan, knowing you’re going to have your hands full the next morning. After you and Frankie are confident that no one's going to choke on their own vomit you check on the baby and then head to bed, both laying on your sides so you can face each other and gaze lovingly into each other’s eyes.

‘Well, that was an eventful anniversary.’ You joke as you give Frankie a warm smile.

‘That it was.’ He chuckles in reply.

‘You sure you’re okay about the baby?’ You ask, your tone a little nervous ‘I mean we’ve only been together a year and-’

‘I am more than sure about us having a baby together.’ He interrupts, cupping your cheek with his large hand ‘How far along are you?’

‘A little over 6 weeks.’ You reply ‘I only found out the day before yesterday. I had a turn at work so they ran some tests and well, turns out you put a bun in my oven. They managed to book me in for a scan yesterday and after talking to Benny about it I thought the sonogram would be a nice way to tell you.’

‘Wait Benny already knew?’ He questions and you nod in reply ‘Should I be worried about how close you two are.’ He jokes, feigning a suspicious look.

‘Absolutely not.’ You reply as you pull him into a kiss, giggling as his hand travels up your oversized sleep shirt to cup your breast.

‘Still can’t believe you told him before me.’ He pouts and you roll your eyes at him.

‘I was kinda having a crisis when I told him.’ You chuckle ‘Was in a complete panic but he somehow knew you’d be excited.’

‘Well...’ He trails off, looking guiltily at you as he darts his tongue out to wet his lower lip ‘I’d kinda told him my plan to propose... and to ask you to adopt Sophia.’ He confessed and you raise your eyebrows as he continues his story ‘I also confessed that I wanted to try and have a baby with you pretty soon after the wedding. If you agreed and wanted to of course. I want it all with your Hermosa. Everything.’

‘Wow...’ You reply, letting out a huff in surprise ‘Well if you don’t fuck me after that speech I’m going to implode.’

He didn’t hesitate to comply, quickly settling between your legs as he kisses you hard and you moan in his mouth as his erection grinds against your bare sex. You rid him of his boxers as he drags two fingers through your folds, grinning at how ready you are for him. There was no need for foreplay, that could come later. Right now you needed him and he needed you and you moan in unison as he pushes inside of you. He starts with a pretty dizzying pace, each thrust perfectly angled and it doesn’t take you long to peak, back arching as your orgasm washes over you. Your moans are like music to his ears, spurring him on as he rests his forehead against yours so he can look deep into your eyes. You gaze back at him, mouth open in a silent scream as he edges you close again and you grab onto his strong shoulders to ground yourself as it hits you, this one dragging him along with you. You remain that way for a while, panting against each other’s lips as you try to calm yourselves, hearts racing beneath the surface of your skin as your minds start to clear.

‘One perk to being pregnant.’ You start, grinning at him as he tilts his head to one side ‘Much more sensitive.’ You finish with a wink, earning a growl from Frankie as he buries his head in the crook of your next.

~

‘Sophie and Diana needed to head out early.’ States Benny as he nurses his coffee ‘Asked me to say goodbye from them.’

‘How’s everyone feeling this morning?’ You ask, chuckling at the groans you receive in reply ‘Bacon sandwiches?’

‘Yes.’ Everyone says together.

Frankie emerges a few minutes later freshly showered, his eyes scanning his hungover friends and chuckling to himself as he spins you around and kisses you sweetly.

‘Morning Fiancé.’ He beams, kissing you again.

‘Good morning Papi.’ You reply, grinning at him as you take his hand and place it on your belly.

‘Oh will you two tone the cute shit down.’ Grumbles Benny as he massages his temples ‘Feeling sick as it is.’ He finishes, giving Frankie the finger when the man flips him off.

~

Chapter 8

[jeeperso]

D&D Quotes Without context

Miscellaneous Edition, for those quotable lines from between sessions

"All I wanna do, is fork a giant woman! A giant woman!" "Jonni, I'm pretty sure she is some type of undead, probably a vampire. Are you sure that is a good idea?" "If I don’t get turned into a blueberry it won’t be my worst date." "Okay, but if you have to defend yourself just don't burn the place down for once." "Oh, Nyx. Sweet summer child. I never make promises we both know I won’t even try to keep." "Jonni, if I wake up to my bed surrounded in flames again I'm short-sheeting your next bed every night for at least a month." "I know you're trying to score here, but Lady Dimitrescu's daughters are literally vampires AND bugs. I can overlook one, but as a Paladin, it is my sacred duty to burn this place to the ground and stir the ashes."

"We don't let Marshall make breakfast anymore." "Those waffles are well-fortified." "I'm going to be charitable and call it hardtack." "We can use these waffles as melee weapons." "Well if we need to deflect siege engines they'll be good to have." "This is still carbon based and digestible by human systems without any poisons." "I can't serve this. It'll cause ... death." "Marshal we've been over this. This Pizza has 10% less of a lethal amount of grease." "Plus they signed the waivers when they bought a ticket. It's fine." "And don't forget to push the Cakeon." "Cakeon being slices of cake wrapped in bacon." "The special sauce is a mixture of mayonnaise, ketchup, mustard, ranch, horseradish, cheddar cheese, sour cream, and anything unfortunate enough to fall into the mixing vat."

"You do have a copy of the legal code I requested in my letter? As landed gentry you should actually have legal avenues to... I'm sorry did you say Burning child?"

"First I'm going to nail a crossbow bolt through your heart. Then I'm going to mount your balls to walls on opposite sides of this chamber." "I need Three Barrels of Butter" "Are you serious? Those Claws could crush an elephant in full plate!" "You're Right!" *Turns to first person* "We might need more than three barrels of butter."

"So Ioun is the patron of poor college kids. that scans "

"its hardtack or a mug of molten cheese-fried... something in a woven mug of bacon. your choice."

"Welp, all this coke ain't gonna snort itself..."

"Right hand me that dress and the bail money. I'll get Jonni." OOC: Well I mean they allow men in the city. Its just no men live in the city. "I stand by my statement. I'm allowed to look pretty every now and then." OOC: And dragons are the most unprejudiced lovers of anyone after bards.

OOC: Well I mean come on, its Ravenloft: saying a place is of death and madness is like making the observation the day ends in y. "Going out. Getting laid." "Jonni, she’s a werewolf." "Going out, forking a werewolf." OOC: Well Lycanthropy isn't usually sexually transmitted. Its just that Mercedes is a biter. OOC: ...I don't have an appropriate response to that.

"You seriously think I’d turn on my friends for a pile of gold?!?" "sigh I’ll show you my tits. "Hot damn, let’s get these murders done!" "No, Jonni, stay good. Besides, there are plenty of other girls who will do that without asking you to murder us." "Hmmmm… this is the moral quandary of my life…" "I’ll give you five bucks." "Scales tipped!" "Phew, I thought I was going to have to cover her next trip to the topless bar." "No, no, I have the bail money right here."

Nyx: So what’s the inside of Jonni’s head like? Edmund (with thousand yard stare): Imagine every ladies only smut magazine you’ve ever heard of going on forever into infinity while everything is on fire. Food was good though.

"It’s cool. They stole it." "And you know this how?" "Magic." “90% of Ravenloft deaths are mysterious vanishings.” "Why does everything come out covered in glitter and … is that …" "Lube. I’ve got a few theories." "Please don’t share them."

OOC: This is a plan that ends with Strahd having fewer brides, his castle is in flames, and he’s lost his cape.

OOC: Our team consists of a horny pyromancer, a gnome who can fillete you in five seconds, an HP lovecraft protagonist with actual magic backing them up, a literal slab of iron with a face, and a guy with a "I went to the eternal city of Ryleth and all I got was PTSD and this lousy T shirt". Gorbash smashing his shield into their face: "Have! You! Considered! Therapy!" OOC: Good news is you guys will no longer be the most conspicuous guys at the masquerade now. Jonni: Challenge accepted! "Nyx, the bounty on stealing his fake mustache is still on."

"Vanilla is the king of flavors. What does it say about society where vanilla is considered just 'regular'?" "That they have a lot of vanilla." Lash: "Don’t you want wishes?" Jonni: "Do I need wishes to get to see you naked?" Lash: "No?" Jonni: "Fuck ‘em." Vesh: "Oh dammit its my arranged fiance." Pit Fiend: "Milady." Vesh: "An extra wish to whoever punches this douchecanoe in the nards." Jonni: "I wish…for Bigby’s clenched fist of nard punching."

Soth: "Oh, gods, why am I on fire and why is Immigrant Song playing?" Jonni: "Take a guess." Hazlik: "Okay, so its a partridge, stuffed inside a chicken, stuffed inside a duck, stuffed inside a turkey, and the whole thing is fried on a stick. Congratulations, that's the most horrible thing I have ever seen, and I once crossbred an elephant and an owl." "I give him the 'itis, and we run like we stole something." OOC: ...weirdly Curse of Strahd has stats for Strahd zombies but not Strahd Skeletons. Or Strahd's skeletal Steed. Strahd once went to a branding seminar hosted by Bane and it changed his life.

"Are we on a high enough floor that if I throw him through the window he'll be killed by the fall?" "Oh, but when I say stuff like that it’s all 'Jonni, murder is wrong.'" "When they say pick your battles they don't mean to pick all of them. That's too many battles Jonni. Put some back." OOC: He's technically already got a symbiote. OOC: They can get married. Gorbash: "I'm increasing the rent." Venom: "Can I keep the pool table?" Gorbash: "I'm not a monster." Giant Brain: "Jonni… I have summoned you here for… WHY AM I ALREADY ON FIRE! PUT ME OUT! PUT ME OUT!"

"Hello We're the party-crashers. This is Jonni, she's here to steal your women and burn your shit down. That's Nyx, she's going to repatriate certain items from the premise. Marshal over there, is here to studiously ignore our shenanigans. This is the New Guy. He seems pretty chill. I'm Gorbash... and I have been distracting you."

"Will you walk into my parlour?" said a spider to a fly. Jonni: "Hold up. Trying to sex a spider." Nyx: (throws her hands up) And then Jonni wakes up with a spider venom hangover webbed to a wall waiting to be eaten. Jonni: "Eh, I’ve had worse one night stands. I’m not a fucking blueberry." OOC 1: Hey, where does your weed elf grow [her] crops? OOC 2: She probably just grows them in the room she hasn’t paid rent on. OOC 3: Because I was also considering a circle of spores druid tortle. OOC 2: We could be partners! We could turn this into road to el dorado staring Cheech and Chong. OOC: Wait, I just realized five people are hanging out in a pirate bar, and none of us are rogues. We are gonna need someone to get thieves tools. OOC: We have a barbarian with a big stick.

"Are we Foxhound now? Blunderbuss Octopus." OOC1: You want to put the stoner in charge of food. OOC2: Eyup. OOC1: I see no way this can go wrong! OOC3: We need the four basic food groups. Beans, Bacon, Whisky, and Lard. “We pray to Almighty Darkseid! Give us a sign! Thumbs up, for the triumph of the human spirit! Thumbs down to begin the everlasting reign of darkness!” “Where did you find this guy?” “Me? I thought you hired him.” OOC: Yup, nature, arcana, history, investigation and religon at +6. MJ got baked and watched the Discovery Orb a lot. Tordek: "But we have a cleric, Jozan, over there." Strahd: *sigh* Snaps fingers, and suddenly one of Strahd's brides sucks Jozan out the window, cue screaming. "Oh look, you suddenly have an opening, how fortunate." Tordek: "We also have a druid...." Vadania: "SHUT UP, TORDEK!" Edmund: "I think the first order of business may be to discuss your Human Resources strategy..." Strahd: "I have a guy for that too."

"When someone as smart as him talks with himself, it's not crazy...They call it monologing." "I thought it was soliloquy?" "No, soliloquy is when you're talk at someone else when your talking to yourself." "Most people would run from a demon, you run towards it to study it." Professor: "THIS IS ABSOLUTELY FASCINATING! A FROGHEMOTH, AND RIGHT UP CLOSE, IT WILL BE AMAZING TO SEE THIS PERFECT KILLING MACHINE IN ACTION." OOC: Also note the Professor is Lawful Good, Archie is Chaotic Good, so collectively they balance out to Neutral good. OOC: That's good. "The incinerations will continue until morale improves!" “You never incinerate the women!” “Because I’m fucking them!” “I… was not expecting you to be so honest about that…”

"You got what you wanted....but you lost what you had...." "Yes, I'm familiar with how capitalism works."

OOC: Dragons are like, “That’s Krandor the shiney. He only fucks other dragons. Weirdo.”

Gorbash: "D'awww, so tiny... perfect size... FOR PUNTING!" *boots tiny mind-flayer into the horizon*

"Dracula hasn't been spotted in almost recently. Whats he gonna do, destroy all we know and love like he definitely can?" "... my god you people are too stupid to live." "What are you doing in my house?" Gorbash: "...well Edmund has been reading your books, I've been sorting through your armory, Nyx and Irost has been going through your other shinies, Marshal has been cleaving anything monstrous that gets too close, and Jonni has been lighting things on fire to stave off boredom." Gorbash: "Okay Marshal, Jonni. Rock, paper, scissors over who gets [to kill] the bishop."

Jonni: "Did you really think this would make up for what you did?" Nima: "I… killed everyone you grew up with." Jonni: "Yeah, and I’m still not forgiving you for what you did to Eddie." Nima: "I am missing some key context here…" Nima: "Also I committed identity theft on you by having my new undead army tell everyone you are running the show." Jonni: "Oh, no. You’ve fooled the boar tribe. Who still haven’t figured out shitting in a hole." Nima: "Yeah I noticed that. I ruined two pairs of shoes attacking their camps."

[ennui-gt]

Here it is. A Piece Of Borrower Content Written Entirely In Stream Of Consciousness:

AN: so this is incomplete and very…needs revisions to the timeline to incorporate some things I added later! It’s the original universe that Mira’s from! I edited it like Slightly to just change Ross’s name to Ross (if u see Max anywhere that’s his old one I just felt like changing it so that’s just him but different. Anyway) Everything's under the readmore tab, cheers!

The Library Fairy:

-

Basic Plot (Chrono, comic starts from human perspective abt the ‘legend of the library fairy’ ig maybe. Nothing here is permanent cept the characterization)

Part A

1- Mira is borrower currently chillin in a college library

2- She lives off of the cafe on the second floor nd reads lots and lots of stuff about everything when the upper floors close (lower floor open 24/7 but upper floors r vacant p much after 12:00 AM)

3- she starts getting increasingly curious about human stuff cos she’s literate nd books r pry neat

4- it starts one night when she spots an unattended notebook and a half eaten blueberry muffin, nd it’s 12:30 so nobody’s coming back in atm (it’s the 80s so no laptops for the plebians quite yet)

5- so she goes ‘welp’ nd takes part of the muffin, then sees the work on the page and goes ‘hmmmm this is incorrect’ so she helps our and leaves notes here n there to point the kid in the right direction and puts down some book refs for further study bcos at this point she’s been there for 2 years and she knows where most things are

6- she stays behind to see if the human comes back for it, hidden in a hidey hole near the desk

7- human comes in, sees notebook, practically melts w relief nd stuffs it in his bag

8- next day human comes back nd leaves nother notebook and a cookie, along w a hidden camera

9- Mira goes ‘o boy, this a trap, innit’

10- Mira then decides ‘eh whatever I haven’t had contact w anyone in years now so I might as well’

11- she steals the camera film nd leaves a lil scrap of paper saying ‘nice try ;)’ on it

12- student comes back, sees paper, goes ‘dammit’, then leaves note addressed to the ‘library fairy’ and another cookie, as well as more of their work for her to help with

13- bout a decade goes by and now the “Library Fairy” is an urban myth, it’s currently 2003 so she’s also wound up on the school’s unofficial Wikipedia page under ‘local cryptids’

14- most library employees know of her but they don’t go looking out of fear stemming from superstitions bout her, somehow the legend grew from ‘can’t be photographed’ to ‘a student once saw her and died that day’

15- there’s now a small shrine devoted to her where ppl bring offerings hoping to get good grades in return, sometimes they will leave papers for her to proofread nd stuff

16- new prof (named Alexei) finds online article thinks he Knows What’s Up bcos he had a borrower friend as a kid, but they left when borrower’s fam found out about them knowing each other

17- he leaves note wedged in one of her secret entrances behind outlet, asking if she can meet w him at some point

18- Mira, already In it, goes ‘Okay. Alright. This has gone on for long enough. Time to go and never return’ but ofc she’s curious as all hell and like she decides she will at least honor the guy’s request for a convo b4 she goes, but on her terms and w/o speaking face 2 face

19- they Talk in the library after hours, bcos he paid off the janitor to let him stay after hours nd most of the student employees recognize him as a prof nd leave him alone

20- they talk again for every subsequent night

21- she uhhhh finally decides to reveal herself nd prays that her hunch was right nd he won’t try to grab her or anything

22- he doesn’t but she’s nervous so she winds up gettin caught in her own climbing rope like idiot, is now dangling from ceiling in tangled mess

23- he stifles chuckle nd she says smthn sarcastic

24- he moves closer and offers to untangle her

25- she’s like ‘please’

26- so he do, but her grip on the rope slips nd he has to catch her

26- so now she’s in his hand and he just sets her down and now he’s a bumbling embarrassed mess bcos he said he wasn’t going to hold her and he just did and o dear pls forgib him

28- nd she’s like ‘dude u just saved my life it’s fine ur fine chill’

29- internally she’s going HOLY FUCK AAAAAAA but externally, her human’s already worked up enough as it is so she’s gotta b the level headed one

29.5- after a while they both kinda get used to each other more, he gets tenure, they celebrate, some more stuff happens, Aleksei got married (not to Mira, Mira hasn’t actually rly thought about being in a relationship w anyone cos she’s laser focused on gaining as much knowledge as possible)

30- eventually Alexei’s like ‘hey so I’m dean of faculty for the biotech branch now uhhhh would u like actual job teaching students? Cos, uh, you can do it remotely thru online lectures n stuff, no in person interaction, and I uh was just kinda wondering—‘

31- she’s like ‘yes. Yes!!! LET ME HELP PEOPLE OFFICIALLY KINDA’

32- so now she’s a professor, and has revealed her Secret a few times here n there to a number of the faculty, nd she has recorded her own findings in a personal journal

33- ‘humans will treat u like a human if they think ur human first. The kids call it ‘catfishing’’

34- enter Ross, an mall goth who accidentally tripped headfirst into a premed program

35- Mira’s favorite field of study is bio so naturally she’s his prof for a majority of his classes

36- being the good boy that he is, he now knows Mira’s secret. There is an Entire Chapter on him finding out and legit just continuing their conversation as if everything was normal bcos he thought that was how he was supposed to handle the situation

37- then she says ‘u can ask questions, u know’ he’s like OH THANK FUCK CAUSE I HAVE SEVEN HUNDRED OF THOSE

38- and now he kinda knows what to look for in terms of ‘do borrowers live here check yes or no’

39-in his apartment, the answer is yes and he mistakenly kinda stumbles upon the mom one night when he wakes up in the middle of the night for Snack and opts to pretend like its not happening. Unfortunately the thing she was trying 2 borrow (piece of crumb cake for Son Boy’s birthday) is the thing he wants 2 eat so he’s like “uh. ‘Scuse me, ma’am.” and he peels back the saran wrap on the other side of the plate, takes piece, nd then leaves some there for her

40-so now the woman is like ‘welp guess it time 2 Leave’

.1- she and husband Talk

.2-they decide it best 2 go

.3-theyre Packing

.4-lil bab Ellie confused

.5-hawk attacke

.6-cut to Ross

41- Ross also happens to work at a bar and he goes outside for a break

43- he finds smal child—smol smal—on the sidewalk and said child is missing an arm, nd has lost a lot of blood, so he’s uhhhhh Losing It highkey

43.5-parents r nowhere 2 b seen, but the hawk is nearby and circling. Ross gets an idea of what just happened

44- he up and leaves work, thankfully his apartment is above the shop so he jumps up the fire escape w the child and

45- he make tourniquet

46- he calls Mira nd asks her 2 come over to ASAP. he’s A Mess at this point

47- it is Very touch and go, kid needs blood, Mira is the only viable donor so she’s just gotta pray that the blood type is fine and won’t kill him

48- and then eventually they manage 2 stave infection thru antibiotics properly dosed to his size, Mira does Math and Prays basically

49- ‘bout a month in, kid wakes up

50- kid doesn’t rember much since he’s only 3

51- hes v scared of Ross at first but over time he gets used 2 the human

52- kid (elliot) starts 2 call Ross ‘dad’ after a while

53- Ross: *internal screaming but in a good way*

54- the end kinda for now

Part 2

A- New Borrowers In The Building

—three of em. paranoid dad, mom, nd daughter that’s Elliot’s age so he’s pumped

B- Elliot offers them a place 2 stay briefly

C- he knows by now bout like, how borrowers don’t typically interact w humans and Auntie Mira’s a bit of a weird case so he just doesn’t tell em bout his dad being the human

D- the kid finds out first nd doesn’t tell the parents, but they figure it out later kinda and think that it’s a ‘o god he’s being kept as a pet’ sitch so they’re >:| abt it

E- they move out and try to take Elliot w them (by force bcos they think he’s brainwashed) but he escapes and makes it to Ross, who’s like “uhhhhhh”

F- and the mom come out the hole near the counter n starts yelling at Ross, who is…kinda used to it since Mira brings in ppl who need help from time 2 time and they typically don’t react well when they’re lucid enough to understand what’s going on. He’s just not used to being questioned about his own kid

G- so they’re like “WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING WITH HIM”

H- and he’s like “r…raising him???”

I- and Ellie steps up and he’s like “this is my dad. I decided he was my dad when I was three. He’s being a good parent”

J- and Ross is like “yeah what he said. I’m a good parent.”

K- Ross is riding that high til the end of fucking time but like back to the story at hand

L- this is when the husband comes out nd is like “lissen. wifey. ily but that is a very big human and he hasn’t grabbed us yet so let’s count our blessings and gtfo”

M- but she’s like “uh no we stay until I’m sure Elliot is Safe and fucking Sound”

N- so they stay for dinner nd stick around a little longer.

O- Val (the kid) gets closer 2 Elliot and also Ross a bit

P- Mira shows once or twice, first time she shows up they’re like “oh god it’s the crazy doctor lady this all makes sense now” (bcos Mira does check up on as many borrower families as possible in her free time so word has got around by now Of her, and the number by which to contact her in case her services r needed)

Q- After a month or so, then they decide to leave bcos they’re like “look we get that ur son is ur son and he only has one arm and in our profession that is kind of a death sentence but we can’t have our kid getting used to dealing w humans who know about our existence” so they go and leave on a kind of sour note bcos Ellie can do anything he wants to do just as well as any other borrower Thank You Very Much and Ross is ready to fite anyone who thinks otherwise

R- Elliot starts trying 2 b more independent, basically from now on he’s like ‘I can do everything my Damn Self Thanks’

S- but uh he does it to a point where he’s going out of the way to endanger himself

T- so they get into a fite about it and ross Yells and Elliot is like ‘kthxbye’

U- and the boi just. Fuckin bolts. Runs Away. Ross is a Mess, he starts smoking again (he quit cold turkey the day he took Elliot in) to curb the depression, he’s jus. Not doin good, worried that his son is dead and the last time they talked it’d ended badly

V- FREEDOM!!!1! Except Ellie doesn’t kno how to take care of himself so it’s a rough month or so and then he runs into some other borrowers livin in their own town in the wild ig, chillin, being hella independent, and he’s like “uh yes ofc I will join u, I was w my dad for a while but.........” he neither confirms nor denies that his dad’s dead but everyone kinda just assumes.

Part 3

W-anyway a year goes by and then the borrower group gets hit hard w some kind of sickness ig. Elliot gets it too he’s basically incapacitated n drifting in and out of lucidity. So. They contact the weird crazy doctor lady who hangs around humans, a.k.a. Mira, and she’s like “oh. fuck. I know this kid.” bcos she does, u kno, and she jus treats em all for their ailment and shows them how to make antibiotic poultice thing in case smthn like it happens again. Mold. Penicillin is basically what it is

X-she and Elliot hav a Chat (Mira basically yells at him a lot) once he’s fixed up and he decides he’s gonna visit his dad but he makes it very clear that he is a Grown Up (he’s not, he’s literally sixteen), and he is living on his own now

Y- he agrees to stay for a week tho since he misses his home a lot tbh and Ross is just. Over the fucking moon to know he’s ALIVE, he’s not gonna fuck up their relationship by insisting that he stay. Or like, by keeping him ofc he would never

Z- unfortunately the borrower community put two and two together and figured out his dad’s human so they have his stuff packed up when he gets back w mira, who’s ready to go the fuck off on them

End 1:

-Ellie is living at Ross’s place atm and hopeful about the future basically. He eventually will go off on his own but he’ll keep in contact w his dad and stuff

Part C.5

55- few yrs later

56- elliot is Adult now he does adult borrower stuff

57- he moves out

58- finds nice borrower gf (her name’s Tess)

59- doesn’t tell her about his dad being human but talks about his dad a LOT

60- so when she asks to meet said father he’s just like “uh. Maybe we don’t do that actually”

61- and she’s like “y tho”

62- and he’s like “bcos”

63- anyway she decides to look into it cos she knows he goes to see his dad nd keep in touch but his dad is allegedly “a recluse who lives in the big scary human’s walls to avoid other ppl”

64- which is. Not true in the slightest tbqh he’s def not an introvert he’s just a workaholic and he Is the big scary human

65- anywho they run into Val and her wife and she’s like “how’s Ross been?” And Elliot is acting Very Suspish so she, being Smart, calls it immediately and is like “oh shit u haven’t told her yet have u”

66- Tess: “told me what”

67- Val: “El’s dad is a human, bro.”

68- Tess: “I’m sorry?”

69- this results in a Big Fight and they separate for like, a month. Elliot blames Val bcos he’s being irrational and doesn’t wanna admit to the fact that lying to his girlfriend for over a year was Real Bad Actually, but over time he’s like ‘yeah it’s my fault sry for snapping at u’ cos he works thru his emotions n stuff

70- Eventually gf comes back cos she’s like “ok so. I understand why you lied to me about your dad. It was a dick move but I do get it and I still care about you a lot. I would like. To meet him.”

80- this is a lie she does not want to meet him she is doing this bcos she does not want to lose Elliot and that outweighs the fear of his dad

81- so they go to meet him but she’s just kinda. Behind the wall at first like “that’s a crazy big human this is crazy ur crazy it’s time to gO”

82- Val is also there bcos she hasn’t seen Ross in a while

83- they eventually coax her out of hiding

84- and by that I mean Val picks her up and drags her out into the open by force bcos she basically freezes up the second she catches sight of Ross and Val’s like “u didn’t come all this way for nothing, bich”

85- they have a Painfully Awkward First Meeting, Tess is trying her best but oh god he’s just too fucking. Larg. Ellie ur dad too big

86- tbh tho the ice kinda breaks after Ellie and Ross get into a fight over smthn stupid (im thinking Elliot grumbles bout Ross’s hair being unruly and he’s worried that mira’s using it like a personal storage system again and Ross is like “I’ve been keeping better track of that actually” and then like a little line of paper clips and a few hand-bound notebooks tied together w some string fall out of his fucking mane and he’s like “I can explain”

87- “dad you can’t keep letting her use your hair like a fucking NEST”

88- Tess is laughing now cos god damn this was not what she was expecting

89- that’s it the end it ends w Tess laughing at them being idiots good times r had by all

Uhhhh that’s it so far. I have More but it’s kinda jumbled rn and I need to fit stuff in places. Anyway.

[itstittycitybaby]

Flirty (Lin Beifong x Reader) Part 4

a/n: episode 6 but Lin gets the love and comfort she deserves. also lin’s room has a balcony bc i say so :))).

The pounding in your head felt like someone was driving a drill through it relentlessly. You groaned, eyes slowly opening. The light made your head burn and the migraine you had worse. “She’s awake!” The voice was muddled and faded. “Bolin! Grab the water!” Squinting, the blurred forms in front of you finally cleared. Team avatar stood at the end your bed. Your parakeets were going wild in their cages. Their wings flapped rapidly as their shrill screeching sliced into your brain. “Azure! Ruby,” you croaked, glaring at the parakeets. “Quiet!” Their cries died down but they still hooted softly. “H-here,” Bolin sputtered, handing you a glass of water.

You almost kissed him right then and there. The water was cold as you gulped it down. Your throat was still parched but it didn’t feel like you were dying anymore. “What happened,” you grumbled, rubbing your head. Your fingertips touched a bandage at your temple. The slight sting made your teeth grit together and a softly hiss as the sting worsened. Korra looked apologetic. “You passed out during Lin and Suyin’s fight. Or after.” Lin. Your eyes darted around the room, but there was no sign of her. “Where is she,” you asked, shooting up from your bed. You wiggled out of the sheets and stood on your feet. The world around you felt dizzy. “Woah woah woah,” they all said, reaching out to you. Korra grabbed your arm gently to keep you from falling on your face. “You still need rest!” You waved them off, slowly regaining your balance. Korra let go of you and watched you grab your boots from the floor. “’m fine,” you muttered as you balanced on one foot to slid on your combat boots.

The room around you shifted slightly. You brushed it off as you finished putting on your boots. You needed to find Lin. Finding her was your priority right now. “How long have I been out for,” you asked, swinging your bag over your shoulder. “T-ten hours,” Korra stammered. Team avatar watched you, unsure of what to do. “Wait!” Bolin exclaimed, as you were opening the bird cage. The parakeets settled onto your shoulder. Azure chirped at Asami and Ruby watched the group cautiously. She seemed cranky and pecked at your shoulder softly. You couldn’t blame her; you’d be upset too if someone disturbed your master’s peace. “What is it now? I’m going and you can’t stop me.” “I don’t think we could even if we tried,” Mako muttered. You shot him a glare and he raised his hands up in defense.  “I wanted to ask you something,” Bolin continued, “How did you do that thing?” He pressed his fingers down on his palms.

Your brows furrowed in confusion. Bolin kept repeating the move and making a bubble move with his hands. The lightbulb in your brain dinged. “It’s a force field. Something I invented,” you answered quickly, stumbling your way to your door. “I really don’t think you should be leaving,” Korra called out as you were halfway through the door. “Well,” Mako grumbled, “We tried.”

****

It was silent. Your ear started to ache from pressing it up harshly against the door. “Probably resting,” you sighed. She pushed herself too hard. Your chest tightened from the memories of the fight. She could barely hold herself up from Suyin’s attacks but still pressed on. Suyin. Your lips pulled up into a sneer. Why would she use your actions against Lin? Why would she fight her sister? Lin was weak enough as it is. “She did start it,” you muttered, “but Lin must’ve had a reason.”

“Whatcha doing?” You jumped ten feet into the air. Azure and Ruby squwaked in protest. You swear your soul left your body from Opal sneaking up behind you. “Sorry,” she giggled, “I didn’t mean to scare you so bad.” You rolled your eyes, “Didn’t scare me.” The smile on your face told Opal you weren’t actually annoyed. Her eyes followed yours, staring a hole into Lin’s door. “Are you trying to visit Aunt Lin?”

You nodded, “Yea, but I’ve knocked and no answer. Door ‘s locked too.” “She’s probably still asleep then,” Opal answered. Or doesn’t want to be disturbed. “Really? Fight must’ve taken her out bad.” She didn’t say anything but traveled her eyes to the brightly coloured birds on your shoulder.  Her brows furrowed as she watched Ruby preen at her feathers. “She seems to...like you.” You tilted your head, “What do you mean?” Opal shrugged, green eyes flickering from Ruby to the pavement under her. She followed the cracks and patterns in the cement, seeming to trace them with her eyes. Her voice sounded lost and... sad. “She..seems to enjoy your company more...than anyone else’s. She seems...happier.”

The memory of Opal running out of Lin’s door and crying last flashed in your brain. “Oh Opal,” you sighed, putting a comforting hand on her shoulder. There were tears in her eyes. Her eyes remained at the ground. “Look at me,” you commanded softly. Opal’s emerald green eyes snapped up to yours. They shimmered with tears and her eyes were a bit red. Squeezing her shoulder for comfort you said, “Lin is...complicated. Trust me I dated her.” You let out a sad chuckle. Your eyes wandered to her door again but you were really focusing on the memories of the past. It was all you were good for now. Being filled with regret and never being able to forgive yourself for what you had done. “It doesn’t excuse her actions though,” you reassured her softly, “You did nothing wrong. You’re a sweet girl Opal.”

“Thank you,” She murmured. You smiled, but it didn’t seem to reach your eyes. You pat her shoulder gently before dropping it to your side. “Can I ask you something?” You nodded. “Do you know what happened? Between her and my mother?” Your eyes glanced at Lin’s door again. The dark wood felt ominous and sad as you kept staring at it. “No..I don’t. I’ve been asking myself that ever since I’ve got here. But I know something bad happened.” Silence stretched between the two of you. Opal watched you stare into Lin’s door with yearning.

“It hurts you doesn’t it,” Opal asked quietly. “Seeing the two of them tear each other apart. Her be angry with you and pushing you away.” “Bright girl,” you chuckled bitterly. “I can see it y’know,” she said quietly, “I can see the pain and the hurt haunting her as well.”

You didn’t reply; there was no need to. The both of you stood in silence on the front steps to Lin’s room, waiting.

*****

The flute’s notes carried a merry melody. It was one of your favorites, something you used to hum to your brother after he had another nightmare. Lin had been asleep for about sixteen hours. The cement steps dug into your ass as you waited like a dog hoping its master would come home soon. The sun’s rays kissed your skin as you sat there, playing your flute. Azure and Ruby fluttered about, chasing each other on the ground in front of you. You chuckled watching them tweet and fly around each other. It made you think of Bo and Bao. You smiled sadly at the thought of them. The two of them were incredible birds. They were the only family you had after being alone for so many years.

“Is she still asleep?” You looked away from Ruby And Azure, meeting Korra’s eyes. You shrugged in reply, carrying on with your flute playing. You’ll always be a bitter and lonely old woman. Your teeth gritted as her words rung in your head. She still needed to apologize. Mako and Bolin talked amongst themselves.  Weird, you thought, where’s Asami? They paid you no mind as they argued about who should poke the sleeping bear.

“You should do it you’re the avatar!” You stifled a laugh. Korra grumbled,“Fine fine, I’ll do it.” She huffed, swinging her feet over the brick steps. Her fist begrudgingly knocked on the grumpy bear’s door. “Lin? You okay? You’ve been asleep for sixteen hours now.” No answer. Korra sighed defeated. She walked down the steps about to leave. The sound of the door opening made the four of you perk up. Oh my fucking god, you thought.

Lin stood in her doorway, green earth bender robes adorning her. The silver necklace around her neck glimmered in the sun. Gold is more her colour, you couldn’t help but think as the the avatar and her friends gawked. It was unusual seeing her without her armor but damn did she look good. There was a smile on her face as she bid them a good morning. Team avatar’s eyes bulged out of their skulls. “G-good morning,” the three of them sputtered.

Lin’s eyes wandered over to you. You sent her a quick wave. “Those robes look great on you Beifong.” She snorted, but there was a soft smile on her face. Her eyes wandered to the bandages on your temple. Your nose was still a bit swollen but it seemed to have gone down overtime. The sight made her smile falter and eyes flickering with guilt. You sent Lin a reassuring smile. There wasn’t any anger in your heart. You couldn’t bring yourself to be upset with her. You could never be upset with the woman you loved.

Lin’s posture seemed to relax more but the guilt still laid underneath her eyes, rumbling like a beast. Lin bowed her head and left.

****

“I’m sorry Lin. For everything. I was a crazy kid back then, I admit that.” Lin didn’t say anything. Her sister stared at her expectantly but kept her mouth shut. Suyin had tore their relationship apart. Her mother quit because she couldn’t take the shame of having a criminal as a daughter. Because of her, Lin had a scar she had to look at everyday in the mirror. For thirty years, Lin couldn’t let it go. The idea of letting go of the anger and pain she had been so accustomed to was terrifying. How could she let that all go? The anger she left after all these years was the only thing that warmed her.  It comforted her as time moved on. If she let go, there’d be nothing left.

Lin and Suyin stared at the metal sculpture in front of them.  “Thank you,” she spoke after a while. Suyin turned her gaze to her sister. “I accept your apology.”

She smiled, a genuine smile. “We need a new dance coach. How about you stay here Lin? We can be a family again.” Lin snorted, “I think I can start not destroying your grounds for now.” Suyin laughed, “Deal.” The two of them talked for a bit. While Suyin carried on about nothing Lin couldn’t help but feel that she had made the wrong decision.

****

“How did you do that?” “Hm?” You and Bolin sat on a bench together in one of Su’s courtyards. You didn’t want to risk aggravating the already grumpy bear by waiting outside Lin’s door all day. “The shield! Whatever that was.” You laughed at the childlike enthusiasm Bolin expressed. It was adorable and sweet. His excitement made you feel young and free again. Bolin reminded you of Bumi and Dee. “It’s a force field. I made it,” you stated proudly. “How did you make it?!” You laughed, “There’s a lot that goes into it. Metal, energy, and some other stuff.” Bolin tilted his head and asked, “I thought you weren’t a bender. Aren’t you just an architect?” “Sadly, I’m not a bender. But I am an architect, you were right about that. I’m also an inventor.”

“A damn good one at that.” The two of you looked up at the intrusion. Lin stood there with her arms crossed, peering at the two of you. After apologizing to Opal she went back to her place to talk to you. However, you were gone. She wandered around until she heard your voice. Lin flickered between the two of you. She swallowed the jealousy the striked through her. Bolin gulped nervously at Lin’s light glare. He glanced towards you. You didn’t even seem fazed at the death stare Lin was sending. “I’m..just gonna go,” he said awkwardly, “Opal and I have plans.” “Sounds great,” you smiled, sending him a wave. “I’d be happy to show you the shield later.” He smiled nervously and murmured something about finding you tomorrow.

Once Bolin left Lin turned to you. “Busy?” “Not anymore” you snorted, “Someone got jealous and scared Bolin away.” Lin’s teeth gritted together and her jaw tightened. “I’m not jealous,” she grumbled, eyes narrowing to slits. You raised a brow and crossed your arms. “Glaring at someone hard enough to burn a hole through their head? Yea, that seems normal.” “Just forget it,” Lin grunted, turning to walk away. “I’m just teasing,” you called out, jumping up from the bench. “What did you have in mind?” Lin stopped and turned to you. “Whiskey.” You grinned, “You sure know a way to a person’s heart Lin!” She snorted. “Are you coming or not?” “Yea,” you chirped, “I gotta get a couple things from my room real quick. Meet you at yours in ten?” Lin nodded. “Great!” She watched you leave, chuckling at the hop in your step. Azure and Ruby flew around you, chirping. Lin smiled softly at the excitement in your pace and the happy aura that surrounded you.

****

The whiskey went down smoothly. Lin had always been a fan of it from the burn that welcomed her. Silence stretched between the two of you. Her stomach prickled at the nerves in her veins. Apologies were hard for Lin but if she didn’t apologize she’d be just as bad as Suyin. You fiddled your glass in your hands, cradling it on the railing. Azure and Ruby flittered about on the metal. Their brightly coloured feathers contrasted with the back metal railing.

“Yknow,” you said, breaking the silence, “I didn’t think this city would be so pretty.” Lin arched a brow, setting her empty glass on a side table near her. “What? The metal?” She gestured to the metal shield that protected the area around the two of you. You snorted, “Yea definitely. Just look at the bolts. They look so strong. Would be great for a project I’m planning.” Lin chuckled. She wouldn’t admit it, but she missed this. The late nights when the two of you chatted about nothing and everything. The dry jokes the two of you shared as you embraced each other in bed. It tugged at her heart in such a way where she didn’t know what to feel. Sad?Angry? Happy? Lin guessed it was all of them.

Her eyes fell to the white bandage that faced her. It covered your right temple and barely rested above your cheekbone. The shame flashed hotly in her chest. The guilt felt heavy and..gross. Lin’s apology she had practiced on the way here died on her tongue. She couldn’t utter the words she repeated in her head. Maybe she was just as bad as Suyin.

“It doesn’t hurt that much,” you muttered softly into the air. Lin’s heavy gaze made your neck prickle. You knew she felt awful. Her strong eyes always seemed to waver whenever she looked at it. Whenever she looked at you.

“I know.” You turned to her, brows drawn in confusion. “You do?” Lin sighed, “No I don’t..I just..I wanted to apologize.” You didn’t say anything. Your curious stare made Lin feel small. It made her feel like a kid and Toph caught her misbehaving. She felt like shrinking into the tile of the balcony and disappearing. She watched you pull out a blunt and a lighter. The soft orange flecks lit up and you took a drag. Blowing it out, you handed it to her. Lin accepted it gladly.

“It’s alright Lin,” you said, shooting her a smile. “I’m not mad.” “You’re not?” Shaking your head, you took the blunt once she handed it back to you. Another hit, and then you passed it again. It was a pattern. “I could never be angry with you. Nothing could ever make me hate you.”

“Why did you do that,” Lin asked, eyes focusing on the railing. Lin wanted to run. She would always be a coward. She would always run like her life depended on it. In a sense, it felt like it did. “To Protect you.” Lin’s eyes flickered to your lips. They wrapped around the blunt. They looked so soft and warm. Lin wondered if you still used the fruity chapstick you loved all those years ago. You caught her eye and sent her a wink. She looked away, cheeks slightly flushing.

“It’s all I know,” you whispered. “I care about you...I... if I seeing you getting hurt or the idea of,” your voice wavered. You swallowed thickly. “I’d rather get hurt than see you in danger.” Lin didn’t say anything but you knew she hung on to every word you said. “What Su did...Suyin,” you corrected yourself. Suyin wasn’t a friend to you anymore. She had cut off that friendship now. “You didn’t deserve that Lin. And I’m so so sorry.”

Lin swallowed. She was deathly quiet. For so long she had been angry. Bitter, lonely, sad. She directed it at people who didn’t deserve it and in turn the people she loved left. Lin had a hard time facing her feelings and accepting them for what they were. She felt so lost at hearing your words. The words she had been daydreaming about from you were now reality. I care about you. It felt weird and wrong coming from your lips. And yet, they felt like home.

“It wasn’t true? That I pushed you away?,” Lin’s breath wavered. The lump in her throat felt heavier. “Y-you left (Y/N), you left me here alone. I...I had no one. And then you come back out of no where and pretend everything’s fine.”

You took another hit and exhaled. Lin watched the smoke wisp away. The slight buzz in her system and the haziness in her veins was ironic. It almost made her laugh at the irony of its difference from what she actually felt.

“I know,” you replied, voice choking. “And I regret every second of my life because of that. If I could take it all back, I would. I-I didn’t know what else to do. I just saw you and...it all came crashing back again.” Lin’s eyes watered. Damnit, she wouldn’t cry over this. Over something so small and trivial. It had been thirty years. Thirty fucking years since the last time she saw you. And you waltzed back into her life like nothing had happened. What was she supposed to make of that?

“I’m sorry Lin,” you whispered softly. She watched a tear fall from your eye. Then another. This all felt like some cliche movie film. This couldn’t be real, you weren’t real. Lin was dreaming again and soon she’d wake up. She would trudge through the morning to get to work along with the dreams from the night before. They were faded but still left a bitter taste in her mouth. But she knew this wasn’t a dream as much as she wished it were. Every second of this was real. Your voice was real and you, in front of her, were real.

“Do you love me?” Lin hated that her voice shook. She swallowed the tears away. The pit in her throat rolled like a stone. She felt she was choking on air from trying to keep it together. Lin tried so hard to maintain the perfect image. The one she created to make Toph proud, the image she created to finally be at peace with herself. But as always, you saw right through her.

“I never stopped,” you whispered, voice cracking. Your eyes red from the weed and your tears. You sniffled lightly, wiping your nose. You flinched slightly from the pain. Lin took a long hit. Her vision blurred and her heart ached longingly. You were here; after thirty fucking years you came back to her.

Every time she saw you it all came rushing back. Bao and Bo singing along to “Dancing Queen” as it played while the two of you danced. Whenever you first joined the force and Lin couldn’t focus around you. How the two of you would sneak off in the middle of the day and make out in the janitor’s closet. Two young dumb kids in love. Things hadn’t changed. Now, the two of you were old, dumb, and in love.

“I-I understand if you don’t want anything right now.” Lin snapped out of her thoughts. “But I want you to know that I do really care about you. I still want you in my life...but I understand if you want me gone. I-I’ll leave as soon as I can and stay gone for good.” She swallowed thickly. She choked on air and breathed heavily. “No.”

You looked at her, shocked. Lin passed the blunt to you and you took another hit. Patiently, you waited. You’ve waited for thirty years to see Lin again one day. You’d wait for her again in a heart beat.

“I finally have you in my grasp. I don’t want to loose you again.” You looked over to her. Lin stared out into the distance. Gently, you placed your hand on hers. Her eyes shifted at hers and yours hands, then your face. You smiled, lips quivering.

Lin turned to watch Azure and Ruby. They preened each other with their beaks. Azure seemed softer with Ruby as he ran his beak gently through her feathers. “Did Bao and Bo...?” Lin couldn’t finish her sentence. You chuckled sadly, “Yea.” “I’m sorry.” She pulled her hand from yours and gently removed your hand off the railing. Her hand was soft and warm as she grasped yours firmly. You looked at her confused and she sent you a smile in return. Lin’s hand didn’t let go of yours as she hung it by her side. She squeezed it gently.

“Bo died from a robbery,” you whispered.

Lin was surprised. Birds weren’t fighters. ‘Well’, she thought smiling at the memory of Bo trying to fight her reflection in Lin’s police uniform. “How,” Lin asked softly.  “I was asleep. Two men came in my hut that night. Bo screeched loud enough to wake me. She flew around them rapidly.” You wiped the tears from your eyes before continuing. “They flung her against the wall. She died pretty soon after. That’s where I got this scar.” You pointed to the one on your brow. Lin’s heart sank. “What happened to the men?”

“I killed them.” Lin didn’t say anything, but stroked your hand with her thumb. You pulled your lips into a quivering smile. “They were just bandits out in the middle of nowhere trying to rob a poor fool. Hurt like a bitch. Left me a scar to tell the tale.” “I’m so sorry (Y/N),” Lin whispered. She turned her hand to trace your palm with her fingers. It tickled a bit.

“What happened to Bao?” “Died seven years later.” “How?” “Heartbreak. Was never the same without Bo.” Lin turned towards you. Her green eyes were incredibly soft. “I’m glad..that you’re here again.” “Heh,” you laughed, choking slightly. “I am too.”

Lin looked at Azure and Ruby again. They chirped softly and hopped on the tile floor. Azure strutted about, observing the place while Ruby watched carefully. “Where’d you get them?” Your eyes fell downwards and smiled fondly at your precious parakeets. “Dee gave them to me,” you said. “We went to a pet store in the city he lives. It had been a while since I’ve seen him and it was our mom’s birthday. We always try and meet up to be there for each other. Found these two sleeping soundly and the rest is history.”

“They’re beautiful,” Lin murmured. You nodded, agreeing. Silence fell between the two of you. It didn’t feel sad and lonely this time. There wasn’t regret or bitterness. For the first time in thirty years, you felt like you could breathe again. “Thanks for the drink,” you said, dropping Lin’s hand. The blunt was almost out but there was still some of it left. You’d finish it on your way to your rooms. Azure and Ruby flew to your shoulder from hearing your footsteps. Azure squwaked at Lin, demanding pets. Lin laughed and went to stroke his head. “Of course,” Lin said, hand dropping to her side again. “Thanks for the smoke.”

You smiled, a genuine one this time. Yet there was some sadness still swirling in your eyes. Lin felt her heart ache. Before she could think better of it, Lin leaned down and kissed your cheek. Your eyes went wide. You hadn’t expected that at all. “Kissing me so soon?” “I’ll take it back,” Lin grunted. “Can’t,” you argued, sending her a wink. “See you tomorrow?” “See you tomorrow,” Lin confirmed with a soft smile. Giving her one last wave and a chirp from Azure and Ruby, you left the balcony. A real smile was on your face for the first time in a while.

[fanfic-girlie]

He cheats but you find out you’re pregnant

A/N: please excuse the grammar, english is not my first language.

warning: angst

word count:1,3k

It has been a month since you found out. You were chilling in your apartment with your 4-year-old daughter when you got a text message from a friend, it was a picture of him kissing another woman. There was no doubt it was him, you didn’t want to believe it, but there it was, on that day you felt like your world was ending. “There it is again” you thought, nothing good lasts forever, at least, not with you they don’t. An entire 6 year relationship, all the plans, the trust.. everything slipping away.

To say that you were brokenhearted was an understatement, for the last month you had to pretend you were okay, you could barely sleep, you weren’t eating, and what was making you even worse was having to ignore him. Even though he did what he did to you, you still felt bad about ghosting him, and there was nothing you wanted more than to talk to him, you knew that you’d have to eventually, but you weren’t ready yet. He knew that you knew, and he was growing more frustrated by not having news from you, being away on tour for 3 months now, not having seen you in the last 2, there was nothing he missed more than you and his baby girl, but there wasn’t anything he could do now. Realizing you weren’t going to talk to him, he decided to call his sister and have her make sure you were okay.

He wasn’t coming home for another month, but he still had to talk to Helena, she would ask about him everyday, so you decided to let Gemma stay with you for a while to help you with her and facetime her dad whenever she wanted to talk to him. He would ask about you every time he called, but you made sure to be as far away as possible when they were facetiming, you knew that if you heard his voice, you would want to talk to him. Gemma would always make up excuses for you, and Helena didn’t even know what was going on, she was only worried about when daddy was coming home, letting him know every time how much she missed him.

The pictures were leaked, now the whole world knew the kind of person he was, and the “poor thing” you were. That was the last thing that you wanted, now you had to stay home so you wouldn’t be bombarded with paparazzi and questions and sad messages from people you didn’t even know, you decided to deactivate all of your social media, you couldn’t take another minute of it.

Another month had passed and Harry’s arrival was coming closer, you didn’t know what you were going to do, you couldn’t just kick him out, Helena would be crazy if he didn’t sleep with her when he got home. It was all she could talk about, daddy this.. daddy that, you sighed as she babbled about him for the eleventh time today, while taking a sip of your coffee. A ring on the doorbell shook you off your distraction, you and Gemma exchanged a confused look, you weren’t waiting on anybody and Harry wasn’t supposed to come home for another three days.

She opened the door, and there he was, suitcases, sunglasses and not a very good mood. Helena ran off to the door as soon as she heard his voice, apparently he wasn’t expecting Gemma to still be there by the time he got home. Crouching down, he opened his arms and received his very british little gal, even though you lived in California, she still managed to get her dad’s accent. He spun her around, her giggles filling the living room. He took off his sunglasses and you were glad to see he looked like absolute shit, just like you. His eyes red and puffy, his stubble growing bigger, hair disheveled. His eyes scanned the room, looking for you, he looked in the kitchen’s direction and his eyes met yours, you held his gaze for a while and decided your coffee looked really interesting all of a sudden. You heard Gemma try, unsuccessfully to take your daughter upstairs so you could talk, but she wasn’t having it, she didn’t want to be with anyone else but Harry.

He didn’t have another option, so he spent the day with her trying to tire her off until she slept and he could talk to you. You didn’t exchange a word until Helena passed out on his lap, his eyes eventually finding you, he didn’t sleep on the plane, thinking about what he would say to you, but now that he was here, he couldn’t seem to find the words. Your stomach turning every time he looked at you, and you fighting the urge to cry.

He cleared his throat, catching your attention. “I…” he sighed “don’t even know what to say”, you nodded, looking at the wall behind him to not get lost in those beautiful green eyes, those eyes you were so deeply in love with.

“You know, the worst thing is.. I know this isn’t my fault, I know I didn’t do anything wrong, but still everyday for the past two months I couldn’t sleep thinking ‘Was I not enough?’” he watched you carefully, his eyes getting sadder each time you spoke “I’ve been going to therapy again, and I’m taking meds to sleep ‘cause you got me so fucked up” you chuckled “you knew all about me, my story and my previous relationships, all I asked is for you to not do the same thing they did to me, and when I finally felt like I could trust someone again, you go and do the exact same thing they all did. Guess you’re not as different as I thought.” You said, remembering when you started dating and he told you “I’m not like these other guys”

You didn’t even realized you had started crying until he gave you a tissue and tried to hug you, nudging him off, you got up and immediately felt dizzy, in two seconds you were hunched over the toilet, throwing your dinner up and he was taking your hair off your face, you couldn’t even get mad as you were so vulnerable. He helped you up, you washed your face and drank a little bit of water, his concerned eyes never leaving you. “Are you feeling better?”.

You nodded in response “Must’ve been something I ate”.

“Are you sure it’s not…something else?” you snapped your head at him, ready to start going off again, but then realizing you were, in fact, late.

You immediately ran upstairs, going in the bedroom the two of you shared, for the last two months you had been sleeping in the guest bedroom, not being able to stay in a room filled with memories of you two. He realized that you hadn’t been sleeping there, the bed was made, and the room extremely clean, like it never was before. Going in the bathroom, you got a pregnancy test you’d keep in the cabinet, his eyebrows frowned, looking at you.

You raised an eyebrow at him, “Really? Come on (Y/N)” realizing you wouldn’t budge, he left the bathroom and waited patiently at the door, looking around the bedroom trying to distract himself. A few moments later you opened the door, and let him in again. The both of you staying quiet, just waiting the result.

You were extremely anxious and wasn’t trying to hide it, what would you do if you were pregnant again? You couldn’t raise two kids by yourself.. Your thoughts were cut off by him “Look” “I’m scared, you look” “Let’s look together, okay?” you nodded, biting your lip, and grabbing the test with him, a ‘PREGNANT’ appeared on the stick. You started sobbing uncontrollably, he hugged you and you let him. Feelings torn between happiness and sadness, he was extremely excited he would become a daddy again, but not so happy because he knew you wouldn’t accept him back so quickly.

[buckyscrystalqueen]

Meant To Be: Part 9

Pairings: Machine Gun Kelly x Reader

Warnings: Swearing, drug use, cheating

Word Count: 5,975

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You woke up one morning two weeks after being back in the States with a familiar, uneasy feeling in the pit of your stomach. 

“He’s cheating on me.” You said to Sawyer when she finally came down to make a cup of coffee before she headed out back to the pool to edit a new book for the day.

“He’s not cheating.” She said as she glanced over at you as you served Gage his breakfast.

“Soy, I know this feeling. I have felt this feeling before. He’s cheating.”

“Sweetheart, just breathe. He’s not cheating on you, he’s just doing shows...”

“No...” You interrupted with a shake of your head. “No, see I know this man. I know this man so well, that I can see the signs before he even realizes he’s making the moves.”

“OK, so what are the signs?” She asked as she leaned against the counter and took a sip of her coffee. You hesitated for a moment, before simply scowling and looking over at her.

“I’m not crazy here.” You snapped. “I know that man better than I know myself. And I know he’s slept with some one else or he’s going to tonight. I can feel it to my core...”

“OK, did you try calling him?”

“Six times since I woke up.” You said with a nod as you made yourself a bowl of cereal. “No answer, no text back. He never misses his morning call...”

“OK, let me call JP and see...”

“There’s no point.” You said with a shake of your head. “If I have this feeling now, it means I’m already too late. And besides that, it’s almost concert time there, so he won’t answer.”

“(Y/N), are you sure it’s not just a pregnancy thing? Maybe?”

“No.” You sighed with a shake of your head. “Every single time this man has cheated on me, I knew.” With a shake of your head, you looked over at her with a hint of tears in your eyes. “I’m not crazy.”

“No, sweetie, I believe you.” She said with a nod as she stepped over and pulled you into a hug. “We’ll figure it out, OK?” With a nod, you started to cry for a moment, before pulling back to control yourself.

“Four hours.” You told her with a sniffle. “I’ll bet you a thousand dollars that within the next four hours, I’ll have my answer.”

“Hun, let me text Rook...”

“Don’t you dare.” You interrupted. “If that man can’t keep a fucking promise himself without having someone else breathing down his neck about it, then he can make and sleep in his own fucking bed about it.”

“OK. I won’t text Rook. But try not to obsess about it, sweets. I’m sure it’s nothing.”

“We’ll see.” You huffed as you turned to start eating your own breakfast. “We’ll just wait and see.”

“And pray for the best.” She added as she picked up her manuscript off the counter to get some work done while you both waited. You did your best to try and distract yourself for the better part of the morning, but you still religiously checked your Instagram, waiting for the backstage videos you knew the guys always posted to their stories to appear to find what you were looking for. Baze was the first one to deliver, and boy did he deliver.

“I told you.” You said to Sawyer as you walked out to the patio with your phone in your hand. She looked up from her work at the live video with her brow furrowed.

“What am I... oh.” She said as Baze turned to left, giving you both a crystal clear shot of Kels leading some blonde woman neither of you knew out of the green room by the hand. “Holy shit. Wait, this is live.”

“I told you.” You said as you took your phone back with a shake of your head. “I know this feeling. I know this man like the back of my Goddamn hand.”

“Wait, let me call Rook.”

“Don’t bother.” You replied as you turned to head back inside. “I’m going house hunting, you coming?”

“Wait... shit.” She groaned as she threw her pens in the manuscript and jumped up to chase after you. “Are you serious?”

“I told him I wasn’t playing fucking games this time.” You said as you picked up your packed diaper bag, and your son, who you had already gotten dressed and ready to go because you knew this was going to happen, whether people believed you or not. “I’m not doing this to my kids. He can get fucked for all I care now.”

“OK, well wait for me to change at least.” She said as she dashed over to the stairs.

“We’ll be in the car.” You told her as you unlocked the front door. “We have an appointment with a realtor in an hour.” The hour was more than enough time for the three of you to make it to your realtor’s office so she could help you find a nice, move in ready house to rent, and the appointment was timed perfectly so you could make the FaceTime call that put the nail in the coffin of your relationship as well.

“Hey...” Colson panted when he finally answered the call as he pushed his hair back out of his face. “Sorry, it’s been a crazy day. You OK?”

“Show me your room.” You said evenly.

“What?” He asked as panic raced across his blue eyes. “Babe, I’m trying to sleep.”

“Bullshit, Colson.” You interrupted as he got up and quickly headed over to the bathroom. “Room, now.”

“I gotta pee.” He lied.

“Show me your Goddamn room!” You screamed a few seconds before the half dressed blonde dashed across the background and out the hotel room door. “And there it is.” You huffed and shook your head as he quickly tried to explain, while Sawyer looked absolutely stunned beside you.

“Babe, it’s not...”

“I’m done, Kels.” You said evenly. “We’re done.”

“(Y/N), it’s not what...” He started as you hung up the phone and put his calls on silent.

“How did you know that?“ Your friend asked as she looked over at you in disbelief.

“Because I know everything.” You said as you made your next phone call before your appointment time. “Junior. Shut up, I need a huge favor, but you can’t tell dad, and I will pay for everything.”

“Oh, shit.” Your brother sighed through the speaker. “What, you in jail again?”

“I need you and a few friends to come out to California to help me move. Today. Like next flight out, today.” You sighed as tears started falling down your cheeks. “I need... I need my brother...”

“OK, I’m coming.” He said with zero hesitation simply because of the shift in your tone. “I’m coming right now.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I told you not to tell dad.”

“I had to tell dad.” Junior said as he headed in to your old house later that afternoon to finish packing up your things and get the boxes you couldn’t move into a rented U Haul. “Had to take off work last minute.”

“And you’re crazy if you think I wasn’t going to come rescue my daughter.” Ross finished as he stepped inside beside your sister and her husband to say hi. “You may not think to highly of me, but you’re still my kid.”

“You didn’t tell mom, right?”

“No one’s talked to mom since she took you to court.” Tabby said as she kissed your cheek. “Thanks for letting us know about that, by the way.”

“Figured y’all would side with her.” You confessed honestly.

“Alright, what’s going, and where is it going?” Junior asked as he looked around the down stairs.

“Any cardboard box or tote that you see out is going.” You instructed with a sniffle. “There’s some more upstairs, and all the furniture from Gage’s room that I’m taking with me, but I still have more to pack...”

“Alright, boys. Get these boxes outta here.” Ross instructed as he looked at Tabby. “You go help your sister.”

“There’s two boxes in the kitchen marked with giant F’s that are fragile and food.” You called out as you headed upstairs. “Those can go in my car with that big cooler!”

“Is he coming back soon?” Tabby asked as she followed you up.

“No idea.” You sighed as you walked into your room, where Sawyer was packing up your bathroom stuff for you while keeping an eye on your napping son in your bed. “We haven’t heard anything from our inside man about him canceling any shows, so my guess is no.”

“But my boyfriend and I are both stuck between a rock and a hard place here.” Sawyer called out as she set the bathroom box on the floor by your bed. “I’m not allowed to tell him she’s moving out until she’s completely moved out, and he is probably not allowed to tell me if and when he’s coming home.”

“Still sorry about that.” You said as you dumped arm fulls of clothes into a box from your dresser drawers with your sister.

“I know.” Your friend said as she moved on to the closet. “I’m still trying to wrap my head around the fact that you fucking called this shit before it happened.”

“Oh, she’s done that since she was a kid.” Tabby chimed in as she packed the jewelry off the top of the dresser in pairs of socks so it wouldn’t get lost. “She knew my dad was seeing someone before anyone else. She knew my first boyfriend was going to be abusive before he even hit me the first time. She knew when I met my husband that he was the one and same with Junior’s fiancée. She’s the relationship crystal ball.”

“That’s wild!”

“Yea, not so much fun when you know the father of your kids is going to cheat on you... again. Nor when I can’t fucking see that he’s just a piece of shit douche bag time after time…” You muttered as you pushed the next full box toward the door. “And he fucking knows I can feel that shit too, yet he still thinks he slick.”

“Well he’s just a dummy.” Tabby said with a quick nod as she looked around the room. “What next?”

“Gage’s room is the last thing.” You said as you pointed out of the room at the nursery door. “Everything is going. The letters on the walls, the cameras, the lamps. Everything. Wait, take boxes.” You said as you kicked a stack of totes in her direction. She grabbed the totes and headed out as you went over with an empty box to clean out your bedside table and all the other nicknacks you had out in the room.

“Who was she?”

“Oh.” You gasped as you looked over your shoulder. “That’s my sister, Tabby. My dad’s downstairs too, which is really interesting, since I’ve always figured they wanted nothing to do with me.”

“Family steps up in weird ways, at weird times.” Your friend said as she closed the second closet box and pushed it into the middle of the room. “I’ll go help her.” It took your little tribe only forty-five minutes to clean all of your stuff out of Colson’s place, and only twenty minutes to unpack just the boxes from your storage unit. You hated that you’d have to replace all of the furniture in there, but even after a year, it still reeked of cigarette smoke, and had various sized burn holes you hadn’t paid much attention to when you packed it up originally. It took even less time to unpack everything at your new place since there was no real furniture to move yet, and you were just finishing up when the half dozen pizzas you got as a thank you for the guy’s help were delivered to your door.

“What are you gunna do ‘bout furniture, kiddo?” Your dad asked as he looked around the open concept kitchen and living room.

“I’ll deal with it tomorrow.” You sighed with a shake of your head. “Go to a hotel or something tonight.”

“OK, well then I’ll call the U Haul place and book the truck an extra day, and then the hotel we’re at and get you a room with my points.”

“Dad, no.”

“Hush.” He said as he looked down at his grandson, who was pulling at his jean leg to show him a toy. “Wat’cha got there, kiddo? A truck?! Does the truck go ‘vroom vroom’?” You smiled at your old man as he sat down on the floor with a giant smile you hadn’t seen in years to play with his first grandson and one of the toys Gage had pulled out of one of his totes.

“You can tell Rook.” You said softly as you looked over at Soy. “Just tell him his kids are safe.”

“OK.” She nearly whispered as she picked up her cell phone to step out to make the call. “I’m really sorry, (Y/N).”

“So am I.” You sighed as you walked over to the nearest box to start unpacking your life once again as tears fell slowly down your cheeks.

“Come on, boys. Work’s not done yet.” Junior said when he saw what you were doing as he set his crust down on his plate and wiped his hands off on his jeans. “Kitchen first.”

——

“We’re goin’ to the Costco…” Your dad announced early the next morning when you opened your hotel room door with a scowl on your face.

“Daddy, it’s five-thirty in the fucking morning. Costco don’t open until nine.”

“And we’re goin’ to the Walmart.” He finished with a nod. “Get your things, you’re wasting daylight. Breakfast is gettin’ served, and the boys are gettin’ rowdy…”

“OK, OK.” You sighed, knowing that he would just keep talking about absolutely nothing until you did what you were told. “Let me wake up the kid and get dressed.”

“Be ready in twenty minutes.” He said as he turned to continue his wake up visits. “Got a lot to do today.”

“Of course we do.” You huffed as you closed the door behind you with a shake of your head. You got yourself ready as fast as you could, letting Gage get as much sleep as you could until you had to get him up. You were shocked that he woke up on the right side of the bed, and was in a very happy mood. His infectious smile and adorable laugh brightened your morning, and reminded you just why you were in the situation you found yourself in. You were just putting him in his stroller with your diaper bag on your shoulder, when your dad knocked on your door again.

“I’m coming, I’m coming.” You huffed as you snapped the tray in place and unlocked the breaks. You grabbed your phone, that had dozens of missed calls and texts on it, and threw it and your room key into your bag on your way out the door. “You are so impatient, old man.”

“You were getting up this early for the farm.” He said as the two of you led the group to the elevators. “This is the time you should always start your day.”

“He called me to try to wake me up at two thirty.” Junior complained with a shake of his head. “We were still drinking at two thirty.”

“Where the hell did you go drinking at?” You asked as you looked over at him.

“At Ope’s…” He said slowly as if it were the most obvious answer in the world. “Where we stayed last night…”

“Where the fuck is Ope’s?”

“I’m Ope. Well, I’m Opie.” A very tall man behind you said, which made you turn around to look at him. You double took at the familiar face, and tried to find it in your mind as your brow furrowed.

“Wait, I know you…”

“I would hope so.” He laughed. “I’ve been friends with your brother since we were all kids.”

“No, that’s not it.” You said with a shake of your head as you turned toward him a little more. “I know you from here. From LA.”

“I would hope so.” He laughed even harder with a nod. “I was your photographer for Penthouse for the last year you were working.” Your face dropped and completely paled as he swiped his hand at you. “Don’t worry about it. You were pretty fucked up back then, and dealing with your ex’s shit on a regular basis so I don’t take it personally.”

“Oh, my God. I am so, so sorry.”

“It’s fine.” He chuckled as he pat your shoulder. “Really, it is.”

“I’m sober now.” You clarified even though you knew you didn’t have to. “Two years or something like that.”

“Good for you.” He said as he glanced over at you with a smile. “I was always hoping you’d get there. Watching you head toward rock bottom was kinda scary.”

“Scarier to live it, I promise.” You said as you dropped your diaper bag on a long table by the hotel’s buffet and parked the stroller where you’d be able to see your son.

“Oh, I bet. But thank God you made it out on the other side.”

“I more thank God Gage made it out on the other side alive and healthy after my OD.” You said as you started the automatic pancake machine and grabbed some scrambled eggs first to cool them down for your son. “Wait, so how in the hell did you get into photography? And did I even recognize you back then, or am I just that shitty of a person?”

“Oh, you’re just that shitty of a person.” He teased as he worked around you to make his own breakfast. “You looked right past me.”

“OK, you’re rude!” You laughed as you whacked his hand as he reached for the bacon tongs. “No, you don’t get any now.”

“Girl, I dare you to try.” He shot back as he lightly body checked you out of the way. “Stand in the way of a man and his bacon. You’re the rude one!”

“Hey, quit!” You laughed as you wrestled him for the tongs. “You are standing between a pregnant woman and bacon! Quit it! I know your mother!”

“Your sister just doesn’t know how to be single, does she?” Your dad asked Tabby as he sat down with his coffee and oatmeal, like he did every morning.

“Has she ever?” She asked as she sipped on her coffee and waited for her turn at the currently crowded buffet.

“Least he’s home grown.” Ross said with a shrug. “Better than that asshole she was seeing.”

“They’re not gunna get together.” Junior said over your loud laugh as he sat down at the table with his two full plates.

“Twenty bucks says you’re wrong.” Tabby said under her breath as you and Opie came over to eat and feed Gage.

“Deal.”

——

“OK, y’all need to stop.” “No seriously, quit.” “OK, I don’t need to decorate, Tabitha!” “Guys, my towels are perfectly fine.” “I swear to fucking God.”

“When you gunna learn, (Y/N)?” Junior asked as your group stood in line with carts of food, spices, towels, toys, “proper clothes” for you and Gage, and other things deemed ‘necessities’ by your family.

“Each one of you had a college fund.” Ross said as he unloaded the second of three carts onto the conveyer belt. “None of ya went to college, so your sister got hers when she got married and bought a house, Junior got his when he bought a house, you’re getting yours when you need it. But I swear to the Lord above, child.” He said as he stopped and looked up at you with a point of his finger. “Do not abuse this generosity. This is for my grandchildren to have a good life, and for you to raise them up proper. You take care of this stuff, you hear me? Don’t you go back to that man and just throw this shit in storage. All he’s ever done is hurt you anyways; I don’t care what he’s done good otherwise. All three’a ya deserve better.”

“Yes sir.” You said with a nod as you put your hand on your bump. “I understand.”

“You better.” He said with a nod of his head as he went back to what he was doing as your brother snickered silently behind his back. “Or you can deal with Anne and hear all about how I’m just pissing my hard earned money away.”

“Dad, why are you starting fights with the woman that already hates me?” You sighed as you grabbed a stuffed bunny rabbit from Gage before he threw it again to get Tabby’s attention behind you.

“Because you are my child.” He said as he stood up straight and looked at you seriously. “And my children will always come first. You remember that, you hear me?”

“That’s why we are where we are.” You said as you looked down at your son and ran your hand across the back of his head. “For them.”

“Then we keep going.” He said with a nod as he went back to work. You shook your head at him and leaned down to kiss your son’s head as a selfless love you hadn’t felt in a long, long time washed over.

“I love you, Dad.” You said softly as you pushed your cart up for him to unload. “Thank you.” He nodded his head as he looked up at you for a single, priceless moment. 

“Love you too. Gage Michael, don’t you throw that rabbit at your aunt!”

“Child, I swear to God.” You groaned as you took the rabbit from him, causing your first of many early morning tantrums so you could pay for his new favorite toy. “You’re going to kill me one of these days.”

“That’s what I said about you, too.” Your dad huffed as he took the tags off the bunny and passed it back to you. “And yet I’m still standing here breathing.”

“Shut up, Dad.” You laughed with a shake of your head.

——

“You calling to say good night to your son?” You asked when you finally answered your phone later that night. “Because we are not speaking right now.”

“What the fuck, bitch?!” Colson roared as you put together a baby gate at the top of one of the stairs in the interesting split level house that had too much personality for you to pass up on. “Where’s my fucking son?!”

“He’s um…” You said as you looked up across the split staircase at your master bedroom, and then the general area of the room that was now designated as the nursery for the baby on the way, the bathroom that room shared with Gage’s, and finally his room and the laundry room behind you, most of which was behind a wall. You knew exactly where he was since you could hear him watching a movie with your sister in your room while your dad and brother set up his room and Opie and Tabby’s husband, Mike set up the nursery furniture for you, but you shrugged your shoulders and went back to doing your share of the work. “I don’t know. I think he took my keys, though. Try Mexico…?”

“Dude, I swear to fuck, I will call the mother fucking cops.” 

“Fucking chill, he’s watching Thomas the train with my sister.”

“No, where… the fuck… is my child?!” He repeated. “Because he sure as fuck isn’t in my fucking house where’s he’s fucking supposed to be!”

“Nope. He’s in mine.” You said as you tightened the last zip tie so you wouldn’t leave marks on the banisters, and checked that the gate swung open, closed, and locked the way it was supposed to like the one on the other side, and the one at the bottom of the stairs did.

“Babe, why the fuck did you move out?!” He asked as you picked up your cell phone to head to your room to grab the outlet covers to put in downstairs in the living room, dining room, and kitchen next.

“Because you fucking cheated on me!” You screamed as you stopped just outside the door. “Yet again! And I told you that I wasn’t playing that fucking game this time. So we’re done. And we’re done for good. Now, do you want to say good night to your son, or are we just gunna try this again tomorrow?” You watched him fight his demons on whether he wanted to keep fighting with you, or see his son, but he knew you well enough to know that if he tried, you would hang up the phone and go back to ignoring him again.

“Where’s my son?” With a nod of your head, you walked into your room and smiled at your child.

“Hey, Gage. Look, it’s Daddy!”

“Hey buddy!” He cooed, and being on the other side of the screen, you could hear the regret in his voice as his new reality washed over him with the flash of your new bedroom. “You being good for Mommy, huh? Yea. Hey Tabby.”

“Colson.” Your sister said as she picked up a single Cheerio and ate it with a distasteful look on toward him on her face.

“I miss you little man. I miss you a whole lot. And Daddy’s coming home real soon to come see you and Mommy.”

“Mommy has plans.” You said as you did your bedroom and bathroom with the outlet covers first since you were there.

“I’ll be home in a couple days, buddy.” He sighed. “And Daddy loves you so much.”

“Can you say bye bye?” You asked as you pushed a cover into an outlet and turned to get your phone. “Say bye bye to Daddy. Uncle Junior probably has your bed set up by now.”

“Wait, can you just…” Colson said as you reached out to hang up. “Babe, just wait…”

“Colson, I can’t.” You said as you picked up the phone. “Don’t call me unless it’s to say good morning or good night to Gage. We can talk when you get done sleeping with road sluts.”

“Babe…”

“Good bye, Kels.” You sighed as tears welled in your eyes, and you quickly hung up the phone before he could see you cry.

“Here, I’ll do the outlets up here.” Tabby said as she got up off the bed with a small smile. “You watch the movie for a bit.”

“Thanks, Tab.” You sniffled as you climbed on the bed next to your little boy, who was so enthralled with the show he hadn’t even noticed you had hung up with his dad. “We’re gunna be OK, baby boy.” You told him softly as you pulled him into your arms with silent tears falling down your face. “I promised you. We’re gunna be OK.”

——

You didn’t immediately recognize the black pick up in your drive way when you came back from the airport the next afternoon, but the fading UNC sticker on the bumper made you smile and gave you your answer as you pulled into your drive way beside it. Opie glanced over from his phone and took one more drag of his cigarette before putting it out on the bottom of his flip flop as you got out of the car.

“So I found a box in the back seat of my car.” He said with a giant smirk as he left the cigarette butt on the tire of his truck on his way to the passenger side. “Missing some panties?”

“So you’re the reason I’m going commando today.” You laughed as you pulled your sleeping son out of the back. You stopped in front of him to glance in the box he was holding as you adjusted the strap of your diaper bag on your shoulder, before looking up into his brown eyes. “Well, looks like you can officially say you got into my panties a lot quicker than most.”

“First of all, wow.” He laughed as his face flushed behind his beard the slightest bit. “But secondly, I also saw you in your panties long before anyone else did. Or have you forgotten the many adventures of drunken (Y/N) at your brother’s middle school graduation party?”

“Listen, swimming in your underwear is never a bad idea.” You laughed as you locked up your car and headed inside. “And I wasn’t drunk, I was perfectly coherent, thank you.”

“Sweetheart, we were all drunk.” He chuckled. “We were just kids.”

“And for some reason, my father thought it’d be a good idea to leave us all alone that night.” You sighed with a shake of her head. “Thank God for Anne in that situation alone.”

“I’d have to agree with you there. Where do you want this?”

“Just leave it by the stairs. I’ll carry it up later...”

“I got it.” He said as he opened the baby gate. “On your bed?”

“Perfect.” You said as you laid Gage down in his pack and play so he’d keep napping a while longer.

“So what are your plans for the rest of the afternoon?” Ope asked as he came back down stairs. You sighed loudly as you kicked off your shoes and sat down on your sectional couch.

“I guess I have to find a job.” You breathed as you ran your fingers through your hair. “Don’t know what the hell a pregnant, ex junkie, ex model is gunna do for work...”

“Call your agent.” He said as he leaned over the back of the other side of the couch. “Tell him to get you into a TV show role or something. They’re always looking for people.”

“Oh, yay. I can be that kind of celebrity now.” You laughed as you turned and laid down to get comfortable. “You hanging out, or you got some place to be?”

“I can hang a bit.” He said as he stood up straight and came around the couch to sit down on the opposite side. “I just figured you’d wanna nap... oh. That’s a nice fucking couch.”

“Shoes off if you’re napping too then.” You giggled as you rolled onto your side and found a comfortable spot. “It’s a really nice fucking couch.”

“Oh, I could get used to this.” He said as he put his shoes under the coffee table and laid down completely, easily taking up the entire right side with his six foot four frame.

“Spots available, apply within.” You sighed as you closed your eyes for a moment. “Quit touching me.”

“I’m not touching you.” He said as he purposely hit your foot with his shin as he got comfortable himself. “You’re in my space.”

“Oh, get out.” You laughed as you opened your eyes to look at him with a smile. He smirked back and propped himself up on his hand.

“I have to say, I’m really fucking glad to see you smiling again. It got really scary there for a while.”

“How’d you get into photography in the first place?” You asked as you pulled out a blanket from the shelf under the coffee table and tossed it over to him before grabbing one for yourself.

“I’ve always been into it.” He said with a shrug as he tossed the blanket down his legs as far as it would go. “It’s what I went to college for. I just managed to get lucky with my portfolio when I got out here. You remember KaceyJo? She was in your grade?”

“Didn’t y’all get married?”

“Divorced about five years ago.” He said with a nod. “But she did a lot of modeling for me around town when we were married. So I had a portfolio full of awesome Smoky Mountain views and her in various poses in those shots. So I stood out.”

“Probably helps that you’re a hot, bearded giant that could rock a man bun for days.” You pointed out with a small grin. “But I may be harboring an old school girl crush.”

“You had a crush on me?” He asked as he sat up the slightest bit. “How the fuck did I not know that?”

“Because I told Tabby I’d break her snow globe collection if she told anyone. She was the only person that knew. Dude, why else would I go swimming in my underwear in front of Junior?!”

“Wow.” He huffed with a shake of his head. “The things you learn years later at reunions. Well, now you kinda have an answer on why I worked my way to Penthouse for a year.”

“What, for me?”

“You weren’t the only one with a crush back then.” He said with a shrug. “I just told Junior that I’d tell Laura about that night he spend with Molly when they first got together if he ratted me out and he told me you were forever off limits.”

“Oh, good old skanky Molly. Wonder whatever happened to her.”

“Slept her way up Wall Street last I heard.”

“Par for the course.” He nodded his head in agreement as he took his keys and phone out of his shorts pocket and put them and his bandana on the coffee table. “I’m really sorry, Ope.”

“Don’t be, sweetheart.” He said as he brushed his toes against your ankle for comfort. “I saw how toxic he was for you. He fed into that shit so bad, I wanted to knock his ass out every time he came to set. And you were so far in the rabbit hole, only God could get you out at that point. So I did what my church going upbringing told me to. I prayed. First time in a decade at least, but fuck if I didn’t try. Only thing I could do after you threw a bottle of tequila at my face for trying to talk to you.” You groaned and turned cherry red as you tried to cover your face with a blanket, but he chuckled and leaned over enough to grab the material to pull it away. 

“It’s OK.” He reassured as you looked up at him with tears in your eyes. “I don’t blame you. We all go through rough patches in life, it’s what we do after hitting rock bottom that matters. I went through some shit when KaceyJo and I split up. Got in a few bar fights, got arrested, had to do anger management, lost my job. But I’m better off now. Got a good job, got friends... you became a mother, and you’ve got a roof over their heads, and you’re taking steps to do the best you can by them now. That’s what matters now. Not what you did two years ago. What you’re doing right now.” With a nod of your head, you started to cry, and Opie got up and came over to your side of the couch to lay down in front of you.

“I’m sorry.” You choked as you scooted back for him so he could wrap you in his arms.

“It’s OK, sweetheart.” He said softly as he rubbed your back. “I forgive you. I forgive you for everything.” You shook your head the slightest bit and gently held on to his shirt while he laid with you wordlessly to let you feel every emotion you had about your time as an addict since you got sober that you hadn’t been able to do with Colson until you cried yourself to sleep in the safety of an old friend’s arms.

Part 10

[starrynite7114]

snapshots: assumptions

A/N: I cannot believe I have been regularly updating, but the muse has been so strong. I would like to thank @iambabyharry​ for listening to my crazy vents about this story. 

I would just like to apologize now, there is some angst in this chapter. 

If you would like to be added to the taglist for snapshots, please let me know!

Hope you all like the update!

Taglist: @iambabyharry​; @thegirlwhowritesfics​

Masterlist

“You can’t do this,” Rafael frowned as you packed your things. Ares was lying beside Rafael, watching you as well as you placed clothes in a box. 

“Rafa, I just,” you sighed, holding the edges of the box that had your clothing. “He’s having a baby with Adelita, I don’t want to be here for that. I can’t take that.”

“You don’t even know that! It’s all assumptions at this point!” Rafael was frustrated to say the least. Your spontaneous actions were definitely causing his blood pressure to rise since he knew he would have to deal with the aftermath. Angel was going to come knocking on his door, demanding to know where you were. “You always do this, you need to communicate with him.”

“There’s no point, he would want me to stay and I can’t do that. I know it sounds selfish, but this is just like my father.” You purse your lips, taking the box down.

“Angel is madly in love with you, don’t be stupid.”

“I’m due to be in Arizona next week, there’s no changing my mind now.”

Rafael groaned. “You’re such a pain in the ass.”

“I don’t expect you to agree with my decision, but as my best friend, can’t you just show me some support here, Angel has been cheating on me.”

You always knew it was too good to be true. That the ship had sailed for Angel when it came to Adelita. She most likely rejected him and he ran to you. That thought was always at the back of your mind and you could usually keep it at bay but after everything that has occurred the last month and a half, your decision had been made.

It wasn’t a spontaneous decision. At first, you could live with the recent revelations you found out. There were other options after all if you could not have kids. But finding out still broke your heart.

======================

You sat down, awaiting for the nurse to call you. After having your yearly check-up with the doctor, you decided to schedule an appointment with an OBGYN since you were much more sexually active than you have been before. No birth control as Angel specifically asked that you stopped. At first you were opposed to it, but at this point, you were ready to have children, you’ve been ready. You had your initial exam with the OBGYN 2 weeks ago and now, you were following up.

“Ms. Y/L/N,” you heard the nurse call out. 

You stood up, giving her a smile as you walked past her. She led you to one of the examination rooms, sitting on the bed. You waited for the OBGYN to come, anxiously waiting for her to come. Coming here was a bit premature, but you just wanted to make sure everything was in order. You and Angel were ready to have kids. It was a big step, considering everything that you both had going on, but there was never really a good time to have kids. 

What mattered was that you were both financially stable, to some extent, and you would be able to provide for your children. 

It frightened you, but it felt right at the same time. You couldn’t explain it, but you were ready, especially since Angel was so eager to have a child. He was going to be a great father, you just knew it. He doted over your niece whenever she was in town and you couldn’t want to see Angel with a daughter of his own.

Your OBGYN, Dr. Preci walked in, giving you a warm smile as she always did when you’ve seen her before. 

“How are you?” She greeted as she sat in front of you.

“Good, kind of eager, how are you doing?”

“I’m well, busy day as always,” she opened your folder and a quick grimace graced her face before it went back to a smile, except it looked tighter than before. 

That made your stomach churn.

“When you have sexual intercourse with your partner, do you use protection?” 

You shook your head. “No, I guess in some ways we’ve been trying to have a child.”

Dr. Preci nodded her head. “I see,” she wrote some notes down. “We checked all your lab works, which showed abnormal hormone levels, which we can easily prescribe medication for. However, your ultrasound was a bit concerning.”

“How so?”

“Well, uterine fibroids were noted in your ultrasound and with your history of irregular periods and uterine fibroids, we would like to do further testing to assure that everything is well in order.”

“Further testing?” You were frightened, did you have cancer? Your irregular periods never bothered you since it was nice to not feel pain for a long period of time. Your periods were always so painful. Whenever you did have your time of the month, you were always incapacitated due to the pain. For some reason, you always thought that this was how it was normally for everyone and Midol did help every once in a while.

“We cannot guarantee till we get further testing, but I’m afraid that you will not be able to conceive a child.”

======================

You remember the day so well and after further testing, you found out 2 weeks ago that you couldn’t have children. You felt as if you were stabbed in the heart, over and over again as the words repeated in your head. Ares was your companion for 2 days, refusing to talk to Angel as you knew it would greatly disappointment him. When you finally had the courage to speak to him, your world shattered all over again.

======================

Taking a deep breath, you exited your car that you parked outside of the scrapyard. You could do this. You and Angel could adopt or even discuss other options with Dr. Preci. Waving a quick hello to Chucky, you walked quickly towards the clubhouse. But you halt your steps when you see Adelita, a very pregnant Adelita with Angel. You felt your heart clench as your eyes landed on Angel, with a look of such admiration and happiness, caressing her abdomen. 

Adelita cupped his face, softly caressing it and you couldn’t breathe. Quickly, you turned around and made your way back to your car. You faintly heard Chucky call out to you, but you were in your car, already thinking of a way to leave. You were finally able to live with the fact that you couldn’t give Angel a child. But you never even thought that he could have another baby with another woman. You wouldn’t be able to stay by his side as selfish as that sounded because you wouldn’t fully have Angel.

With Adelita pregnant, that meant he must have cheated on you. She didn’t look more than 6 months and you’ve been together for close to 9 months. You felt sick to your stomach as the picture replayed in your mind.

You weren’t going to be the other woman, this just reminded you of the situation of your father and how he left you all for another woman since your mother could not conceive another child. It hit far too close to home. 

You made the decision then and there that you were leaving. You were going to break up with Angel and that unborn child could have a complete family with Angel and Adelita. 

======================

That was 3 weeks ago and you’ve been playing your part with Angel since then. 

You played like nothing was wrong, but you knew Angel could tell you were pulling away. You weren’t actively avoiding him, but club business has kept him away. The movers were going to be here in an hour to bring your stuff to the moving truck and drive it to Arizona for you. Rafael was going with you to drop you off and he was gonna fly back to San Diego.

This was the cowards way out and you knew that, but you couldn’t help it. You didn’t pack up your whole apartment, just most of your clothing was going with you. The company you worked for provided your housing that was furnished. The only thing you truly needed was your own personal items.

“I am your best friend, which is why I’m trying to prevent you from making a big mistake.” Rafael helplessly watched as you went back in your closet to get another box of clothing done. 

“So you’re saying I should just suck it up and watch Angel have a baby with another woman?”

“Ugh, you’re being so difficult! Of course not, I just want you to get all your facts checked before moving to another fucking state.” Rafael has had this argument with you numerous times, but once your mind was made up, it was hard to change.

“For what?! The facts are there! How do I actually know he’s doing club business? They’re working with Adelita now.” you felt the tears well up and fall from your eyes. You never went into depth with Rafael on what the club did, it was for his own safety after all.

“Babe, I get it, but you’re overreacting without even talking to him.”  Rafael felt it was a moot point to try and sway you, but he had to try. He thought you and Angel were perfect together. If you only saw what he saw every time you were with Angel. And for a person who once threatened Angel’s position in your life, Rafael experienced first hand just how much Angel cherished you .

“You don’t get it, it never made sense. Angel’s gonna be just like my dad who left my mom cause she couldn’t conceive any longer. I’m just beating him to the punch.”

“This is actually insulting towards Angel, you think Angel is going to be just like your father? How could you even think that? Angel is nothing like your father.” 

Your father left your mother when you were younger. You never truly understood till your mother explained what happened. She didn’t try to make your father look like an awful man, he made his choice since he wanted more children. Though, your father has tried to reach out to you and your sister, he was happy with his new family and quite frankly, you didn’t want him anywhere near you. 

“I didn’t think my father was an asshole too till he never came back.”

“This is misplaced anger, I think you need to talk to Angel and straighten this out.”

“There’s no point, besides he’ll just lie to me.” Your anxiety has been at an all time high as of late. You hated how the insecurities that you’ve tried to bury for years have been plaguing your mind, no matter how hard you tried to push them away. Rafael made complete sense, you should talk to Angel, but you had nothing to offer him. Adelita was someone Angel was in love with, he told you so and now, she’s pregnant with his child, something you could never give him. Maybe you could stay by his side, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to do so. Knowing Angel has possibly cheated on you and conceived a child, that was too much for you to bear. You should have known this was something that was coming, everything was too fucking good between you two. 

“Your anxiety is really doing a number on you, I know it’s not something you can control, but he’s your best friend, you know him better than anyone.”

“I know him better than anyone, that’s why I know what he’s going to do. Angel Reyes is a charming man who knows how to get himself out of trouble,” you slightly chuckle at your own description of Angel. “I love him so much that I’m willing to let him go.”

“You’re making a big mistake babe,”

“I’ll live with the consequences.”

======================

Angel quickly made his way up the stairs of your apartment, not even waiting for the elevator. He had to see you. He hasn’t seen you in a few days and all he wanted to do was hold you. It was a tough few days with the altercation with EZ then the information Happy had given them. All he wanted to do was tell you all about it as he held you. If anything, he wanted to hear all about what he missed out with you. He hadn’t spoken to you for a day since he wanted to just travel home and talk to you then. 

Opening your apartment, he was surprised that Ares didn’t greet him by the door. Even though Ares was still loyal to you, he warmed up to Angel to some extent.

“Baby!” He called out to you. 

Closing the door behind him, he removed his boots and kutte. His eyebrow raised noticing that your apartment seemed so much more bare. He knew you liked to clean every other weekend since Ares’ fur got all over your things. Usually you were at Angel’s on the weekends, but since he wanted to surprise you, he didn’t let you know he was coming back.

“Baby girl!” He figured you walked Ares or something, the dog did have far too much energy for his own good at times. 

Angel walked further inside your apartment and became nervous. Ares’ bowls were not in your kitchen. Ares had his own bowls at his house, so there was no reason for his bowls to not be there. 

“What the fuck,” he murmured as he noticed that your Keurig was no longer in the kitchen.

He was confused to say the least. He ran over to your room and there were less pillows on your bed. Your charger was not by your bedside drawer. Your computer was missing from your desk. He walked over to your closet and it was almost bare. Angel’s heart dropped. There was no way you moved. He must be in another fucking apartment. Maybe you went on a vacation or something. He couldn’t wrap his mind around you leaving without so much of a word.

“No, this is not fucking happening.” Angel wasn’t even sure what to think, all he knew was that this was a fucking nightmare and anxiety was slowly taking over his body. 

Walking out of your room, he noticed an envelope on your kitchen counter. He quickly grabbed it, ripping it open, a set of keys dropping on the counter. It was the keys to his apartment.

Opening the letter, he sank to the floor as he read it.

Angel,

I’m sorry you had to find out in this way, but I moved. Please don’t come look for me. I grabbed my stuff from your apartment, if I left anything, please just throw it away or sell it, whichever you want. Please leave my keys in the mailbox so my landlord can come collect it.

Just remember, all I want is for you to be happy and I’m glad you’ll have that with your family. I always thought that we were a fluke and you deciding to give us a chance because you didn’t want to lose our friendship, I’m grateful for that. I understand if you mistook your love for me as your friend for something more, no hard feelings. 

I will always love you, but it would be best for us to just admire one another from afar. 

You’re the best thing that ever happened to me. This isn’t on you, this is on me. I don’t deserve you and you should pursue the person you truly want to be with.

Love always, Y/N

Angel reread the letter numerous times, trying to decipher the message. Was this a cruel joke? He wasn’t fucking laughing. He crumpled the paper, refusing to believe this letter. You would talk to him, this fucking letter made no sense.

What family?

What person?

You were the only person he wanted to be with. This just made no sense to him. Who the fuck were you talking about? He’s made it clear time and time again that it was you and him from here on out. 

Did someone kidnap you? There was no fucking way, he would know. If someone kidnapped you, they would have made some noise by now. 

He took out his cellphone, dialing your number. It rang and rang, but no answer. He called you 10 times and every time, there was no answer. 

Then the thought crossed his mind, what if you left him for Gabriel?

He shook his head, that wasn’t possible. You didn’t even speak to Gabriel, there was no way you left him for another man. But the idea screamed at him at the back of his mind. 

What did your letter even mean?

Mistaking this relationship as a scheme to keep you by his side? The more he thought of the words you put in that letter, the angrier he became. He knew he did a number on you by promising to marry you when you two were older, but he always thought it was for your own good. He was going to be your last choice because you were able to experience other people and at the end you two were meant to be together. He didn’t know it would backfire so hard that you would be insecure about his feelings for you.

This was ridiculous. You weren’t going to leave him, there was no fucking way. This had to be a cruel prank. 

He fucking prayed it was a cruel prank. 

Angel got to his feet, rummaging through your apartment. He noticed that there were less things around, things you used day to day were no longer scattered around your apartment. Before Angel could even register, he left your apartment, getting on his bike and rushed to his apartment. 

Once he arrived at his apartment, he looked through his closet and drawers. As you had stated, your stuff was gone.

Angel didn’t even notice EZ was in his living room, calling out to him. EZ went inside Angel’s room and found his brother with his head in his hands, sitting down at the edge of his bed.

“Angel, you okay?”

Looking up at his younger brother, EZ saw the tears in his brother’s eyes. “She left me.” His voice cracked as he told his brother.

“What?” EZ wasn’t certain he heard correctly. 

“She fucking left me Ezekiel!” Angel shouted. “Y/N left me man,” he whispered, “she fucking left me.”

EZ watched as his brother fell apart in front of him, not believing his words. You would never leave him. You and Angel have been attached to the hip ever since you two were teenagers. With everything you’ve been through, EZ never thought you would leave him.

“There’s no way, she wouldn’t leave you.” 

Angel took out his phone again, calling you. Your voicemail was what he got once again. 

“Baby, this isn’t fucking funny. Pick up your phone, please, let’s talk. What’s going on? We can talk about this.” He pleaded before hanging up and calling you once again. Again, no answer. “Call her.” 

EZ took out his phone, calling you and much like for Angel, you didn’t answer. “Hey, you okay? Can you call me back? You have us worried here. Whatever is going on, let us help you.” He hung up, looking at Angel who was holding a letter in his hands. “She left you a letter, what did she say?”

“That we’re done.”

Angel couldn’t wrap his mind around this whole thing. What happened? He didn’t talk to you for one day and you were gone? He didn’t do anything. He knew he didn’t. You weren’t petulant enough to not speak to him just cause you two did not speak for a day.

“It makes no sense,” EZ took the letter from Angel’s hand, skimming through it. “What person? What family?” 

“I DONT FUCKING KNOW!” Angel yelled out, the situation was so fucking frustrating. “How can she fucking do this?” 

“Don’t jump to conclusions, she’ll come back. She can’t stay away from you.”

Angel nodded his head. He shouldn’t. This was going to pass, it will. He was going to call you till you got fucking tired of hearing your phone ring. Once he does, you’ll straighten it out and you’ll be back in his arms again. He didn’t even give a fuck what your reason was, he just wanted you to come back.

But you weren’t. 

You weren’t coming back.

Not this time. 

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

can you please give some reasons why you don’t think Caryl is done after this? Don’t see how it can happen now unfortunately.

not to invalidate your feelings, but are we even watching the same show, my dude?? 

there has never, in ten years, one decade, 87,600 hours, been a more caryl heavy season of twd

i’ve done several in-depth analysis posts, and i gotta get to bed soon, so here are the highlights just to ease your silly lil’ mind (under the cut bc it ended up being a stream-of-conscious novel):

first and foremost, we have a new showrunner, who is a woman, which is always a plus for our female characters bc we have someone who will make sure they’re three-dimensional people, and that was a big problem with caryl for a while. gimple put carol into a “i was abused but i got strong but now i’m sad bc i killed ppl :(((” corner and let her collect dust, and tbf, he also put daryl in the “i was abused but i got strong but now i must wallow in my Man Pain in silence” corner, and then he kind of just forgot about how they had an amazing chemistry and focused more on his three season-long dick jerking contest between Rapey Man #3 and Main Lead Male Grappling With Loss and Morality. so that helps us out a lot!

now in terms of the actual show, i’m just gonna like, list things without giving analysis or clarifying bc i’m tired and have already explained a lot of it, but if you need me to explain again you can just message me and i’ll answer it when i’m awake:

caryl’s storyline has been set up to sail since the start of s9

carol and zeke were always going to breakup, and she only married him for henry and escapism bc she’s never dealt with any of her trauma ever in her entire life and there is a lot of it

the title cards indicated as such

carol’s wardrobe change between the time jump in s9, and between “the calm before” and “the storm” indicated as such

carol’s wardrobe this season also indicates where her mindset is rn

kang is rewriting carol’s storyline, and in effect, rewriting caryl’s storyline, in order to right the wrongs done before, and that’s why it’s taking so long, bc she wants to tell it properly instead of just having them smash in the middle of a field with no build-up

not that we’d be against it, but i personally prefer it this way

carol trusts daryl as a father figure more than zeke. see: her asking him to watch over henry bc zeke is too idealistic, and “so what if i dream about you being my husband and henry’s dad sometimes? shut up”

carol went to visit daryl in the woods to escape her marriage that she didn’t actually want to be in anyway

carol got daryl to stop isolating himself

daryl then proceeded to do all his therapy homework and has settled down and is like “cool, time to finally get with carol!”

except kang is telling carol’s storyline properly

which means that carol is in CrazyTown rn, bc she has 1. been in an abusive marriage 2. seen her daughter walk out of a barn as a walker and then get shot in the head 3. seen a small girl stand over her dead sister while wielding a bloody knife and smiling like a maniac 3b. after having promised her late father she’d protect her 4. had to shoot said maniac girl in the head 4b. after having promised her late father she’d protect her 5. made a connection with a small boy against all efforts to the contrary and then he got eaten 6. finally saved a child and thought she finally broke her curse and got into a rly boring weird fantasy marriage in order to protect him only to see his reanimated head chilling out on a pike among a line of all of her dead friends

AND SHE REALLY NEEDS TO DEAL WITH THOSE THINGS, OK?

so she has #cracked and is spiraling, and daryl’s entire storyline this season has been “shit carol is trying to smuggle guns to rendezvous with the enemy,  wait shit lydia is getting beat up let me help her, wait shit carol is kidnapping whisperers and torturing them in the basement, wait shit lydia ran away, wait shit...” etc

SO HE HAS A REASON TO BE KIND OF TIRED RN 

but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t care, it just means that all this tension is leading up to something INTENSE between the two of them. it’s going to come to a head Big Time, and i am v v v hype

anyway back to random things that have been pro-caryl this season

they keep juxtaposing zeke and con with carol and daryl, and caryl pick each other every time

carol’s choice of weapon suddenly being a bow

flower symbolism

boat symbolism

new mexico

acorns and bracelets and their subsequent #meanings

THE FUCKING DREAM WHY ARE WE NOT STILL OBSESSING OVER THAT DREAM THAT DREAM WAS SO IMPORTANT???

she. literally. dreamt. she. was. married. to. daryl. dixon. in. literal. canon. and. stated. it. wasn’t. the. first. time. and. that. she. thinks. the. dreams. are. good. like wtfffff

daryl does not have feelings for con and is very explicit about it

the fact that it keeps coming up is delicious tho

“follow my voice” vs “follow my light”

“i’m the one you talk to”

the repetitive use of we/us

“if i only knew what you told me i wouldn’t know shit”

“i NEED you to stay”

alpha/beta foils and parallels

repetitive reminders of both carol and daryl’s past abuse

did i mention the dream where she dreamt that she was married to daryl bc i feel like that might have been important

carol having sex with zeke

yes that’s a good thing

yes i’m entertained by it and totally chill

we are at the very top of the roller coaster, lads, we are tying up all the strings, we are making sure carol and zeke have closure, we’re gonna get (probably in an irritating murder way) closure with connie, and Then There Were Two

10.14 is called “look at the flowers” for christsake

“i could never hate you” ok fanfic trope number 6 billion

all of it

literally all of it

this has been a crazy romantic, tumultuous season, and some really meticulous and purposeful and beautiful storytelling and it is about to pay tf off

until i am given E X P L I C I T reason not to:

I WILL STAN KANG

and also, just to add, there are characters and plotlines that exist outside of caryl, and the writers have to incorporate all of them. there are gonna be scenes with them, there are gonna be things that happen that seem negative but that make sense when you look at them on a larger scale. you cannot, CANNOT, look at each individual thing and take it at face value. we have a showrunner who knows how to write now, so little things mean bigger things, and not always the things you expect

i know this is not the proper use of bullet points

it is past my bedtime

but anyway caryl is coming ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

stay hype, stan kang, and get daryl to call carol sweetheart 2k20

the end

-diz

p.s. remember that dream? wild huh

[dopescotlandwarrior]

Bluegrass-Chapter 24

                    Much love to @Statell for making my stories flow.

Previous chapter on AO3

Chapter Twenty-Four

The shop owner bent over his worktable and pried the stones out of the gold setting. The ring was fourteen karat gold and would fetch a nice price. When the bell above the door tinkled, he looked up at a lady coming to the counter. She tossed a large ring on the counter.

“Sell or pawn?”

“Sell.”

He looked at her and reached for his loop. She looked like a street person so how did she come by this, he wondered. To his amazement the diamonds were real, and the gold tested to eighteen karat. His heart was ramming.

“Who’d you steal this from lady?”

“It’s mine, you ignorant asshole.”

“Sorry, I can’t help you. Try down the street.”

She grabbed the ring and looked at the man with her one good eye. “Fuck you.”

He watched her carry her bulk toward the door and waved his hand in the air to chase away her body odor.

The woman tried two more pawn shops and the third was owned by someone with fewer scruples. He bought the ring for one thousand dollars plus a gun. It was a lady Smith and Wesson five-shooter. She grabbed a box of shells on her way out, looking at the man defiantly. He ran to lock his door and start making calls. This ring would sell quickly for ten thousand. If it wasn’t hot, he could ask fifty thousand easily. He flipped open his phone book and started dialing.

The sweaty woman stumbled into Walmart and felt the cool air inside provide a little more energy for the last item she needed. Twenty minutes later she held her new phone to her ear and ordered a taxi to take her to the Motel 6. She paid the driver without a tip and heaved herself out of the car. There were working girls and ugly people all around the place. She would fit right in.

Walking up to the desk, she pulled her shirt down over the roll of fat that bulged from her tight waistband. The clothes she was arrested in were now three sizes too small. Prison food is created to keep hundreds of people full for a few hours. Not much thought went into the caloric intake or a balanced meal. Carbohydrates and fat were the main ingredients of her diet for eleven months and she tipped the scale at two-hundred and fifty pounds. The clothes she wore were donated by the prison and they were cutting her in half.

Pulling her coach wallet out of her bag she pulled her license and scooted it toward the clerk. Ten minutes later she was locking her door and scowling at the traffic noise right outside her window. It would have to do.

She was exhausted. It took all night to get processed out of jail and then shown the door to freedom at five o’clock in the morning. She would sleep a bit and then call her father. He will want her to come home because there was nothing for her in Kentucky. He would put her mother on the phone who would beg and cry for her daughter to come back to Scotland. That could wait as well, she decided.

For eleven months she has thought of little else then Jamie Fraser, the man who stole millions of dollars from her by denying her any rights to the business or his new horse. Word went around the prison that Midnight Runner won the Triple Crown and that meant an extraordinary life was now his to live while she was shipped back to Scotland like yesterday’s trash. God she hated him.

Isobel laid down on the bed but thinking about Jamie got her so riled up she couldn’t sleep. Maybe a hot shower would help. The rundown hotel had a small mirror in the bathroom, the first clear mirror in eleven months. She looked at her face and tears rolled down her fat cheeks. One of her eyelids opened only a slit after she was punched in the forehead during a prison fight. The nerve damage was permanent. She looked at her hair cut almost to her scalp. A going-away present from the bitches who hated her and kept her in solitary much of the time. She recalled being held on the ground while the meanest of them cut off her hair. It stuck out in all directions and she tried to smooth it down with water, but nothing helped. She was raging inside at what he did to her. This was all his fault.

Isobel’s father kept money on her books, the maximum allowable at the insistence of her mother. Isobel had nothing but disdain for other women making it quite impossible to make friends who could help her. She bargained her commissary for favors and finally found someone with a relative who would look up Chad’s whereabouts. He was in the Kentucky State Penitentiary in Eddyville and she wrote to him every day and couldn’t wait to hear back. Months went by with no word and she became hurt, and then mad. She sent another letter and on the outside of the envelope in small letters, she wrote “you little puke of a man why won’t you answer me?” She didn’t expect a response and when one came it was short and to the point.

‘Enduring your disgusting presence and vomit worthy sex was a means to an end. You self-absorbed cow. You never figured out I was gay because you were busy looking at yourself, with or without a mirror. It made it easy to manipulate you. Happy now?’

That was Jamie’s fault as well, she stormed in her head. He deserves to be skinned alive and forced to watch. She wouldn’t risk him getting the upper hand, so she had to settle for a bullet in his head.

She picked up her purse and left. There was a liquor store on the corner and she needed whisky, and a lot of it.

Claire woke up in an empty bed and noticed a note on her side table. She smiled as she read it.

“It is a perfect day to sit on the sundeck and read. There is nothin you need to do today, and I won’t be long with Michael.”

They had purchased a new double-wide ergonomic chase and had not tried it out yet. Maybe they could read the book together. While she waited for Jamie, she chose pages throughout the book to read and was very impressed with Michael’s writing. The theme running throughout the book was about kindness to the horse through various means, particularly the whip. He advocated the elimination of pain as a motivator. It would change horse racing completely because the competitors would be running because they wanted to win. The horse had to love running and it could be done, according to Michael, but training and reward had to change.

Claire wondered how this book would differ from Nosh’s. He was coming to Kentucky the following week and would spend the day with them. She was excited to fulfill her promise to finish her story, whether he believed her or not.

Jamie dropped Michael at his hotel just after noon. He would be joining them for dinner tonight and would UBER back around seven o’clock. Jamie looked forward to an afternoon lounging with his best girl.

For the rest of the day, Jamie and Claire took turns reading the book and powered through half of it before cuddling on the chase to nap a bit.

“Sassenach.” Jamie ran his hand down her arm until she opened her eyes. “Will ye come with me to bring the horses in?”

She smiled up at him and nodded yes before pulling her jeans and boots on. They walked to the barn and discussed the book, both commenting on how much they had forgotten about those crazy days. They brought fifteen horses in, two at a time, then went to bring in the mares and babies. Claire laughed at the antics of the foals, running ahead and then freezing with fear when they couldn’t see their mothers. When all were put away for the night, they made one more trip for Runner and Porcelain. When Jamie watched them running to the gate, he looked at Claire with a big smile.

“I’d like to bring Porcelain into season early and breed her in February.”

“To him?”

It was settled. Porcelain would be Runner’s first cover and Claire was thrilled. A touch of romance in an otherwise clinical setting of the breeding room. They would be each other’s first.

As they walked home, Jamie threw up his arms and announced he had finished the repairs on Runner’s stall, and they could move them back to their larger accommodations. Claire held his hand and told him tomorrow would be soon enough. She had a shower and cooking to do.

It was a delightful time to sit with their old friend, spoil him with steak, roasted vegetables, and copious amounts of whisky. Claire considered inviting others to dinner but decided she didn’t want to share Michael’s time. They ate at the table outside and simply moved to more comfortable seats to continue the discussion.

Jamie answered the doorbell and spoke to a neighbor before announcing he would be back in ten minutes. The neighbor needed a jump. Michael offered to come and help but Jamie told him to relax, he had this.

Michael had Claire in giggle overload reminding her of times they were on the road. Claire got up to grab the coffee pot and stopped in her tracks.

“Michael, do you smell something burning.”

He stood up and said he smelled it too. When Claire opened the front door, she screamed for Michael. It was definitely a fire and somewhere close. They started running and a quarter-mile never seemed so far. The closer they got; they were more convinced it was the barn on fire. Claire punched numbers into the keypad, and Michael opened the roll away doors as smoke poured out.

“Chase them all out, Michael!”

Claire ran down the aisle pulling stall doors open until she got to Runner and Porcelain and they were not moving. None of the horses were running outside. She slapped Porcelain hard on the rump knowing Runner would follow. The mare whinnied loudly and took off for the big doors.

Claire looked at the smoke filling the barn and coughed into her shirt. She saw horses running by but could not see Michael. She continued to work her way down the aisle smacking horses so they would run to safety. She looked up and saw babies running alongside their mothers and knew Michael had gone to the dams’ wing to set them free.

Jamie waved to the neighbor as he drove down their shared road. He caught the scent of burning wood and jumped into the bed of his truck to look for smoke. Finally, he saw the embers rising into the air on his own property! With a hammering heart, he drove through the gate and saw horses scattered all over. He knew someone was at the barn and drove as fast as possible, ever watchful for a horse running across the road.

Jamie ran to the barn. His heart rate was in the stroke zone and he started coughing the second he was inside. He called for Claire as he ran down the aisle looking for any stuck horses. The dams’ wing was empty, where the hell was Claire and Michael? Or whoever let the horses out. He turned the turbines on that pulled air from the interior. They were all over the roof so he ran as fast as he could flipping them on high.

He called the fire department as he ran for Runner’s wing. The door was open and something inside him told him to proceed with caution. He could hear Claire and Michael coughing. Why were they in there? When he heard Isobel’s voice his blood turned to ice. He forced himself not to cough and give away his presence. He searched frantically for a way to get the drop on her. He had to do something before Claire and Michael died from asphyxiation.

He ran to the back of the barn where the smoke was too thick to see. He ran his hand along the wall until he felt the switches for the turbines. Filling his lungs with air he ran into the equipment room and pulled out a ten-foot length of steel pipe, very relieved it wasn’t burning hot and ran back.

Claire wasn’t coughing any more and Jamie knew she passed out with death coming for her. Without another second to think he rammed the door open and kept running as Isobel’s startled face came into view. She raised the gun just as he rammed the pipe into her stomach, impaling her on the back wall. He threw Claire over his shoulder and helped Michael to his feet pulling them outside to safety.

The fire engines were coming in slowly with no siren because Jamie explained there were horses scattered all over the property. Michael was bent over coughing and Claire was silent, unconscious. Jamie lowered her to the ground feeling more terrified than he had been in his life.

“Claire! Claire!”

The EMT’s pulled him away to render lifesaving aid to his wife, his soulmate, his whole world. Fire hydrants were installed on the land according to zoning rules and the men soon had two flows of water directed at the fire. Jamie heard more sirens coming only to go silent as they negotiated the gate and keypad.

The ambulance EMT’s were given instructions to open the gate and wait for it to close to make sure no horses escaped. The driver knew there were critical injuries and it took all his training and willpower not to barrel ahead to the injured. Jamie was covered with soot and sweat as he gripped his wife’s hand.

“Please Claire, ye must fight yer way back to me or I will surely die with ye.”

He was pulled away as they wheeled the gurney into the ambulance, Michael was loaded into a second vehicle. Jamie sank to his knees as a great crash came from the barn and a plume of embers rose into the night sky. Jamie didn’t flinch. He couldn’t move as he was locked into his pleading prayers to God.

A great fireball exploded into the dark sky and men were yelling about a secondary fire. Jamie heard none of it and continued to pray.

The captain pulled Jamie up and brought him under the light spreading out a schematic of the barn interior.

“Is there anyone else in the building?”

Jamie pointed to Runner’s wing. The fire captain pulled him to the large engine and told him to sit down. The huge fire engines took up all the space available in front of the barn and police cruisers were lined up behind them. Officers were standing by a short distance away and the captain went to speak with them.

Jamie felt the tears fall off his face, he knew his business was in ruins, his prize horse chased into the darkness, but none of that mattered as much as Claire’s pale, soot-stained face. He looked up at the commanding voice above him and stared at the officer with blank eyes.

“You identified an area where someone was left inside. I am sorry to inform you that the roof caved in above that wing about five minutes ago. Did anyone go back inside to pull the person out?”

“No. I impaled her against the wall with a ten-foot length of steel pipe.”

Jamie stood up and walked toward his vehicle but never made it. It took five officers to hold him back and he was finally cuffed and dropped into a cruiser. He had no comprehension of what was happening, and he fought against the restraints until he felt a blinding pain as his wrist separated. He slumped forward choking through this added suffering.

“Mister Fraser! Stop struggling I have news of your wife. She is in intensive care, so is the other man, but they are expected to pull through. They are gonna be fine. You have confessed to a capital crime. You belong to the Lexington police force now so you might as well cooperate and sit still. You’re a big man and tasers hurt, so walk when you’re told, sit where you’re told and answer our questions. It’s the best advice I can give you.”

Jamie did as told and explained who Isobel was, how she tried to kill his horses before. He did not know she was released on parole. She had set fire to the barn and held Claire and Michael at gunpoint as they slowly choked to death in front of her. She wore an elaborate gas mask and just stood by as they struggled to breathe. She had raised her gun to Jamie’s head as he rammed the pipe into her stomach. He did not bother to go back in to save her because he was too busy with his wife and friend.

“I didn’t know if she was alive or dead. I didn’t care.”

Jamie was a pillar of the community and the officers made quick work of releasing him with the warning to not leave the state. There was an officer waiting to take him to the hospital. Jamie sat in the back seat holding his throbbing wrist. The officer decided to break the rules for the poor man and turned on his siren as he raced to the hospital.

Jamie piled out of the car and ran into the emergency department. He approached Claire slowly with tears streaking through the grime on his face. He was so overcome at the sight of her his whole body started to shake.

The nurse taking her blood pressure almost fainted at the sight of Jamie but recovered quickly as his face softened looking at his wife.

“She has been asking for you if your name is Jamie that is.” She had a warm smile and a concerned face.

“It is… my name is Jamie.”

The nurse ran for the chair that was shared among the visitors because it looked like he would fall any minute. She pushed Jamie into it and asked if he was alright.

“As soon as this lass opens her eyes, I will be fine.”

“She is doing really well physically. Her doctor may keep her tonight, not sure yet.”

Jamie looked down at Claire’s open eyes, looking at him. She seemed to look at everything she could see and then he watched her dissolve in tears. She was fighting to stop crying but she just couldn’t. She tried to speak to him, but no sound came out.

“Her voice will come back. Two or three days.”

Claire was asleep again and Jamie felt lost suddenly. She just closed her eyes to the pain that was making her cry, leaving Jamie alone. He picked up the phone and called Jason, then Angus. He knew he had to leave her and get back to what was left of their barn. He kissed her face and walked toward the entrance, there lingering at the doorway was the officer who drove him to the hospital.

“Mister Fraser, I waited to take you home, sir.”

Jamie looked battle-scarred and fatigued at the moment, so they headed for his home without further comment. The fire was out, and firemen continued to crawl through the haylofts and roof structure looking for live embers. They had done an excellent job limiting the damage. The fire marshal approached Jaime and shook his hand. His voice was commanding yet tempered with understanding that Jamie appreciated.

“Mister Fraser, it’s a tragedy to be sure, but we minimized the damage and found all the clues, I think. The fire was set on the north-facing side, right here.” He pointed to Runner’s wing on the barn schematic. Gasoline was used as an accelerant that was provided by your fuel tower. The perpetrator used your five-gallon buckets that were stacked at the hose in back, filled them with your fuel, and left the nozzle open to drain the fuel into the ground. When embers landed there it all went up in a fireball. You will have an ugly reminder for a while I’m afraid. It’s safe to bring the horses in except for this area. The roof caved in and it’s burned badly. It is where we found the body of a woman, but I hear you have given a statement to the police already and believe her to be responsible. The coroner has removed the body. I will be in touch as the investigation progresses. He walked toward his vehicle throwing his clipboard on the seat before getting in.

Jamie looked around feeling lost until he saw Rupert and Angus walk out of the barn with two leads each and lariats attached to their belt loops. They looked at Jamie’s haunted eyes and simply nodded as they made their way to the pastures. The horses were tied to a fence once caught so they could be identified and counted. Jason and Lulu pulled up looking shell shocked. Lulu was crying and asking about Claire. Jason ran to the barn for halters and leads and handed a lead to Lulu as they left to search for more horses.

Molly and her fiancé were next, followed by two of the vets that Claire had befriended. They would check the horses that were brought in and treat any issues. As word spread, neighbors and owners came in to join the search and by afternoon, all but two horses had been rounded up. The missing horses, Porcelain and Runner.

The horses were split up into groups and led to graze in the multiple pastures. They would stay outside for the day and let the barn air out. Jamie continued to call Claire, to say I love you and give progress reports. Jamie’s voice cracked when he said they had not found Runner or Porcelain and Claire sobbed for the lost horses but mostly for Jamie. Michael had fared better and was released to rest in his hotel room. Jamie wandered through the pastures calling for Runner until dark.

Jamie stayed with Claire overnight. She was moved out of critical care and there was a fat Lazyboy right next to the bed. He had full trust in his crew, so he stayed until she was released the next day. She mostly cried when she was awake, and Jamie couldn’t wait until he could hold her and give her comfort.

Driving into the compound was very hard on Claire as visions of Isobel taunting her, saying she would shoot Jamie in front of her and then let them die, came back to haunt her. Jamie explained that he had killed Isobel, but Claire expected her to jump out from every corner.

Claire couldn’t yell for Runner, but she insisted on walking the far pastures to help look for him. To no avail, the two of them were gone. Jamie held Claire through the night, waking up every few hours because she was crying and shaking. He eased her back to sleep much quicker than he was able to follow her. By the next day, he had deep circles under his eyes as he drove the property in search of his horses.

The other horses were returned to the barn, back in their original stalls because there was very little damage to anything but Runner’s wing. Jamie shivered to think he wanted to go back to the barn and move Runner and Porcelain back to their original stalls. He closed the wing off with plans to rebuild once the insurance was settled. Not one of the owners moved their horse to another barn. They knew Jamie was honest and ethical. This was not his fault and he had taken care of the problem.

Jamie sat down hard on his office chair in the early evening. The silence was such a relief after playing hero for the past two days. He wasn’t a hero. He was terrified about what could have happened and what will happen next. Could his business recover, could Claire feel safe again, could they find a new normal without Runner? Picking up his ringing phone he heard the deep voice of Dunsany, and he lost it.

“Jamie, it's going to be alright. You aren’t hurt, you will repair the damage and go on. Now listen to me son, get it out, and then get back to work. That’s a good lad, I’m here for ye, depend on that.”

Dunsany waited, speaking quietly to encourage Jamie, trying to infuse him with the will to start over. They talked for almost an hour and Dunsany told him arrangements had been made to bring Isobel’s body back to Scotland. She could never threaten them again. The older man worried deeply about Jamie pulling out of this nightmare and his anger at Isobel kept him secluded from his family for several days. It wasn’t right for a father to hate his own daughter and he would keep that to himself.

Jamie walked the pastures as the sun was coming up. He had a distinctive whistle that all the horses were used to. It always brought them in, no matter how far they had roamed. He heard a whinny and turned his head, heart beating like thunder in his chest he watched the pasture turning in all directions and finally saw her. Porcelain ran toward him crying out her fear in loud whinnies. She came to him and snorted while he slipped the halter on her and snapped a lead. He started walking back expecting Runner to run up on them any second. When he closed the door to Porcelain’s stall, he dropped his head in defeat.

“Where have ye gone laddie?”

Jason, Lulu, Rupert and Angus put the barn back together, ordered supplies, rented stalls, answered calls from worried owners, and assisted whoever and whatever was needed in the moment. Their fearless leader searched for Runner day and night and Claire was not often seen. She looked shattered and they didn’t know how to approach her, so they didn’t.

Michael came on the fourth day and took Claire to drive the property boundaries. Claire searched the pastures through field glasses as they continued to drive for two hours. He was just gone. He jumped a fence and just kept running she assumed. There were thousands of acres of forest that bordered their land and he was lost in that forest somewhere, starving to death. Claire’s sobbing broke Michael’s heart. He stopped the car and pulled her out to hold her to him. He promised her they would find him.

“We need to walk the land, Claire. He’s scared and hiding somewhere in the trees. Let him see us walking.” He pushed a lead in her hand, and they ducked between the white slats of the fence to walk the endless acres of Bluegrass.

Runner watched them from behind the trees. He watched her mostly and wanted to go to her. He could hear in her yell, something foreboding and fearful. If she would just get on his back, he could ride her to safety. He tried a couple of times to break out of the tree line, only to retreat in fear. They were getting closer to him. He was about to turn toward the forest and run but he saw images in his mind of Claire hugging him. It made him so happy. She was telling him she needed a hug. In the next second, he bolted toward the fence boundary and jumped it with ease running toward her, happier than he had ever been.

“Stop Claire. Turn around.”

Claire turned to see Runner galloping toward them. She started to giggle and then she held her arms out like she always did, for him to run into. He stopped ten feet from her and showed her images of being hugged. She kept her arms out and walked to him until she could wrap them around his neck. She put her hands on his cheeks and Michael could swear they were having a conversation as Runner would nicker at times and drop his head on her shoulder.

Are you hurt?

I do not hurt.

Where you afraid?

I was afraid.

She kissed his face a dozen times and asked him to walk back to the barn, assuring him the smoke was gone and he would be safe. She dug a handful of sugar cubes out of her pocket and he feasted on them.

Very hungry.

Let’s go home.

Michael called Jamie to tell him they were walking back, with Runner, and he started running to meet them. Runner nickered and lifted his head when he saw Jamie running toward them. Claire unsnapped the lead and Runner took off stopping right in front of Jamie’s beaming smile. They were still hugging when Claire and Michael caught up to them.

Porcelain whinnied loudly in the air and stomped all over her stall. Rupert looked at her and wondered what got into the lass when he saw the movement in his peripheral vision. He was almost in tears when he saw the three of them with a giant black horse behind them. Runner went to Porcelain for a make-out session and Claire could see images of Rupert pouring grain into his feeder. She laughed quietly to herself.

“Cheeky bastard.”

They said goodbye to Michael at the airport and made him promise to visit soon. Claire hugged him and cried while Michael complained she would surely melt with any more tears. Once on the road home, Claire leaned against Jamie and wrapped her arm around his middle. They had not made love since the fire and the feel of him was suddenly intoxicating. She kissed his neck until she was breathless and when she pulled his belt away and grabbed his zipper Jamie pulled onto a logging road into the forest where he pulled her to him and kissed her deeply.

They were frantic to join their hungry bodies after a long hiatus from passion. Jamie pulled her shirt over her head and reached around to unclasp her bra setting her breasts free to bounce with their efforts. When she finally pulled him into her body, they both moaned loudly before the rhythm of arousal took them to a new plane of existence.

Officer Josh Baker was heading back to the station while he daydreamed in heavy traffic. When he saw Jamie’s pickup truck veer off the road, he shook his head and blinked several times. It couldn’t be, he told himself. What are the odds of finding them in the same predicament as before? Some people never learn he thought. He pulled off onto the logging road to wait.

Traffic along the four lanes where Jamie took the detour slowed way down due to the cruiser parked along the side of the road, presumably for radar speed checking. The officer pointed his radar gun out the window and waited. When he heard Jamie’s engine start he pulled into traffic, and they were none the wiser about his protection.

Slowly, life at Highland Brothers returned to normal and Jason, the new custodian of Claire's truck, would pick her up for a day of medical treatments and do his best to remember any of the details when she asked him. On long rides she would describe the lab assays they would run to get him used to the terminology and procedure. From February to June, she would reduce her hours away to ten hours per week so she could take care of the breeding operation. She was anxious to be working with Jamie again.

Claire sat across from Nosh at the kitchen table and looked at the sheets of pictures. There had to be at least five-hundred pictures of her and runner. She answered Nosh’s questions thoughtfully and held nothing back. Nosh recovered quickly from the declaration that she can talk to animals. He always knew there was a major component of the story missing.

“I have wondered how an untrained jockey could ride that horse through all those races.”

“It was my yoga training. My balance was very good and if you hadn’t noticed, I didn’t move at all, once the race started, I just hung on to is mane for dear life. He told me what to do, when to do it, and I felt safe after a while.”

“How could he hear you during the race, there’s too much noise?”

“Are you saying you believe me?”

“You are an educated woman Claire, a veterinarian, and you won the Triple Crown as a novice jockey. I’ve been on the track all my adult life, so I knew there was a secret to your success. What I wouldn’t give for photo evidence of you racing him on foot.”

“Oh! I have photo evidence. Jamie took loads of pictures from the equipment barn where he hid for the first month. They are amateur at best, but I will be happy to show you..”

Nosh was on his feet in seconds, “please, yes I would love to see them.”

Claire settled Nosh in a chair close to the computer monitor and brought up the pictures. There was a perfect sequence of them at the starting line, Claire running full speed around the track, and Runner staying on the rail to pass her. Claire bent over panting and Runner circling her with his head and tail in the air. In the last picture, Claire is scowling at the horse with her hands in the air.

Nosh laughed so hard and sputtered “pure gold!” when he could catch a breath. “Good God, I haven’t laughed like that since I was a kid. Name your price, I’m sure the magazine will pay it.”

“Certainly not! You can have them with my thanks.”

This was the icing on the cake to Nosh. The book he had dreamed of for the last year would be better than he could have imagined.

Claire told Nosh everything from cutting Runner out of his dam to winning the Triple Crown and all the baiting and psychological tricks she used to keep him wanting to win. The story was told, and she sat back and took a deep breath.

“How would you like to spend some time with Runner?”

They walked out to the pasture and the two horses made a bee-line for them. Claire stood in front of Nosh and opened her arms for two frothy-mouthed horses to assault her with smells and snorts. She stepped aside pulling her phone out of her pocket and launching the camera app. Nosh seemed frozen as he watched Runner come toward him. Claire moved farther away and started snapping pictures. Nosh, nose to nose with Runner, the colt draping his head over Nosh’s shoulder from behind, stroking his neck, laughing at the assault on his pockets looking for treats. Claire kept snapping until she had sixty-five pictures of Nosh and Runner. She would transfer all the pictures of Runner including these to a thumb drive and send it to Nosh. It made her happy inside to give something back.

Claire walked the reporter out to his rental car and hugged him, thanking him for everything. Nosh saw no reason they might meet again so he made his words count.

“You feel like the daughter I never had. I am so proud of what you’ve done. If your actions with Runner are any indication of motherhood, I hope to live long enough to see your kids cure cancer and win the Nobel prize. Goodbye Claire, and thank you for the interview.”

Motherhood? What an odd thing to say, she decided and waved goodbye.

Claire walked back into the house feeling her mood turn dark when she looked at the ugly furniture she and Jamie had failed to replace. She wished for a happy feeling when she opened the door to their home and hated this furniture even more after the fire. A call to the Salvation Army to pick up a high-end living room set pushed her to the front of the line. They would pick it up this afternoon. When the living room was empty, she called Jamie and asked if he could finish early because there wasn’t a chair or couch to sit on anymore. They needed to visit the furniture stores in town.

Claire got dressed up with straight hair and makeup because it felt like a special trip, something to be remembered. They would finally take ownership of their space and rid the memory of the most heinous woman on earth. With only one week until Christmas, she was excited.

Jamie watched a beautiful, confident woman walk toward him when he came home. He looked at her long pretty hair, short dress, and high heels, feeling his stomach do flips.

“Yer beautiful Sassenach, and our living room is empty sure enough.”

“You have ten minutes James Fraser.”

[hurricanerin]

Not Just One of Your Many Toys 1: Don’t Tell Me What to Do

Pairing: Ransom Drysdale/OFC

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: MAJOR SPOILERS, loss of virginity, power imbalance, general dickishness

Summary: Ransom and Olivia have been thorns in each other’s sides for fifteen years.  They’ve tolerated one another, coaxed each other through major milestones, and trampled on one another’s hearts.  After years spent healing from one of Ransom’s toxic outburst, Olivia finds herself subpoenaed by the Drysdale family as a character witness for his criminal trial.  Their son is out of control, and the one person with the best chance of getting through to him wants absolutely nothing to do with the man.   

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Boston, 2005

 There has never been a moment in my life that I haven’t known exactly who Ransom Drysdale is.  We met in the fall of 2005, right after my dad was promoted with General Electric and my family had moved to Boston from Puerto Rico for his new job. I was 13 and Ransom was 19, and I could’ve told you within 5 minutes of enduring his company that he was a playboy and a Grade A narcissist.  

My parents and his mom, the legendary Linda Drysdale, had closed on our new house the week before.  When my papá had mentioned to our realtor that he had 6 engineer brothers and sisters in PR also looking to move to the Boston area, Linda immediately swooped in and took over the sale.  We had moved into the new house for two days when who showed up on our doorstep with a giant Harry and David gift basket on his mother’s behalf? Ransom.  I’ve never seen my mom so taken with a man so quickly.  It was absolutely nauseating.  

My mom and I had been sitting at the kitchen table eating breakfast with my little brother when Ransom waltzed in, ruining our meal.  While he charmed my mom, I shooed Gian from the table, stuffed him into his coat and boots and shoved his toast into his hand.  

“You’re gonna miss your bus, vete,” I said with an affectionate push.

He waved me off, but I could see his smile as he scrambled out the door towards his friends.  When I turned around, Mamá was on the phone, distractedly scribbling on a notepad at the center island.  Ransom had seated himself at our table and was examining the gift basket. After retrieving a pear, he rearranged the treats so it looked as if nothing were missing.  Catching my eye, he shot me a grin, took a bite of the fruit and flaunted it in front of me.

“Want some?”

My mom’s groan of frustration cut off my retort as she hung up.  Without missing a beat, Ransom hid the pear behind his leg.

Clipping her beeper to the waist of her skirt, she motioned at my backpack.  “Ol, you need to get your school stuff and hop in the car, I have to go to the hospital early.  I need to drive you; school is on the way.  A patient needs to go into surgery now.”

I scowled and put my hands on my hips. “I’m taking the bus with my friends. You said at this school I could!”

Already gathering her coat and keys, she shook her head.  “I’m sorry, mija.  Not today.  Come on, we need to go.  I can’t leave you alone at home for that long.”

My nose started to sting.  I didn’t want to sit at school alone for an hour and have to explain to my new friends why I wasn’t on the bus like everyone else.

Carefully watching the interaction, Ransom cleared his throat.  “Mrs. Santos, I would be happy to stay with her until her bus comes.  I’m home on break from Yale for the week and would love nothing more than to get to know your daughter,” he offered, radiating charisma.

“Oh Ransom, I couldn’t ask you to do that.”

“Honestly, our house is only a few streets away, so we’re practically neighbors.  It would be no problem.”

She hesitated, glancing from Ransom to her watch. Back home, we didn’t have babysitters. Family played that role.  I couldn’t imagine leaving her 13 year-old home alone with a strange man was high on her list of things to do in the US.

Ransom read the situation well.  “Mrs. Santos, my girlfriend is just at my parents’.  Why don’t I give her a call and the three of us can clean up the kitchen until…,” he motioned at me.

“Olivia,” I snipped.

He didn’t flinch.  “Until Olivia’s bus comes,” he finished with a smile.

“I suppose… that would be alright,” Mamá agreed.  “Your family is so kind!”  Sighing in relief, she snagged me for a kiss goodbye and scurried towards the door.  “Behave, Ol! I’ll see you at dinner,” she shouted over her shoulder.

I listened to the garage door close and turned to find him thumbing through the Harry and David catalogue while dabbing pear juice from his lips with a napkin.  I glared at him for a minute.

“You and your mom are just being nice to my parents because I have a lot of aunts and uncles moving here,” I accused.

He looked up, laughing in surprise.  Nodding his head to the side, he shrugged a shoulder, “You’re not wrong.  Did they tell you that?”

“No, but I can tell.”

A soft ping sounded and he patted his pockets, pulling out a phone from his jacket.  He continued nibbling at the pear until all that was left was the core, then absently dumped it on my abandoned breakfast plate.  I walked closer and peered at the screen in his hands while he typed furiously.

“Do you have any games on your phone?” I asked.

“This isn’t a phone, it’s a Blackberry.”

“Do you have any games on your Blackberry?  Like Snake?  My mom’s phone has Snake.”

“No, it doesn’t have Snake,” he snapped as he pulled a headset from his jacket pocket and plugged it into the headphone jack. Almost immediately it rang and he slipped the earpiece on, pushing me.

“Jackson?”  He sighed at me in irritation and turned away.  “Yeah, come up this weekend.  They’re two Norwegian bitches, semi-professional skiers or something. Super hot.  They’re in the US to train but stopping to vacation in New England or whatever.”  He ran his finger along the wicker of the gift basket while he listened to his friend respond.  With an exasperated sigh, he shook his head.  “No, no, we don’t need to take them sailing for them to put out.”

I stared at him, my jaw dropping.  I knew it was rude to both stare and eavesdrop, but I had never met anyone who was so blatantly awful.

“They’ll fuck us because I’m crazy rich, bro, don’t worry,” Ransom chuckled.  He leaned back against the table and rolled his eyes as his friend prattled on, until his gaze landed on me.  His eyes widened.

“Shit,” he muttered.  “Jax, I’m not alone.  I gotta go.”

He yanked the earpiece off and tossed it on the table, leaning towards me with his elbows on his knees.  

I scowled.  “You don’t really have a girlfriend who’s coming over.”

“Olivia,” he said with a practiced smile that actually reached his beaming eyes.  Ignoring my statement, he took me in for a moment, cataloguing my appearance as his gaze came to rest on my neck.

“That’s such a pretty necklace you’re wearing, did you pick it out yourself?”

My insides tingled a little.  I didn’t like-him-like-him or anything, but he did look like a prince and he had complemented the starfish necklace my parents had given me for my birthday last summer.  It was my favorite.

“It was a present from my mom and dad, from when I turned 13 last year.”

“Christ,” he muttered under his breath.  Something about me being a kid.  I didn’t know what that meant, because he made an angry face. But that quickly went away and then his prince face was back.

“That was my friend Jackson on the phone,” he motioned at his Blackberry with his thumb, “We go to college together.  We joke around a lot,” he chuckled, rubbing my shoulder. “You do that with your friends, too, right?  Tell jokes, mess around?”

Confused and skeptical, I nodded.

“And you don’t always tell those jokes to your parents, because they don’t understand them.  You keep them between you and your friends.”

I raised my brow, trying to look formidable.  “You don’t want me to tell my mom what you were talking about.”

The friendliness in his expression melted away, the corner of his mouth tugging upwards instead.  “Exactly.”

 To this day, I wish I could say I stuck up for myself; that I told my mom how much of a jerk he was.  How he was a deceptive, womanizing liar who didn’t deserve an ounce of our time.  But, I didn’t.  Instead, I stooped to Ransom’s level.

My family had money; my mom was a physician and my dad a senior engineer for GE.  We lived very comfortably.  We had spent several months in the US in an apartment before finding the house, during which they had been earning American salaries and making more than ever.  But, both of my parents came from humble means, sent a lot of money back home to their own parents and grandparents, and did not appreciate the materialism I faced every day at the private school they sent me to.

And Ransom had… a lot of money.  He had made that clear over the phone.  I’m not proud to admit that I requested the Tiffany heart tag bracelet I had seen other girls wearing at school in exchange for my silence.  I’m even less proud that, after scoffing at my proposal, Ransom walked me right past the Tiffany & Co. on Newbury Street and in to Cartier and had me pick out a bracelet there instead.  He said he hadn’t bought Tiffany for a girl since he was my age and that he wasn’t lowering himself.  I still have the bracelet buried in my jewelry box, though I never put it on.  Considering its origins, it feels dirty to wear, but I can’t bear to part with it.

 Boston, 2007

 In 2007, we found out my dad had a mistress.  He had paid for her to move over from PR and had been supporting her in Boston for two years.  That would’ve flown in PR, but in the US, my mom’s friends wouldn’t stand for it. (Especially the female divorce lawyer next door.)  That was more or less the end of my dad’s presence in my life.  There’s a chance he might walk me down the aisle one day, but that’s only if Mamá insists on a super Catholic wedding.  

My dad leaving didn’t affect me like it did my mom and Gian. I had my friends and tennis, but Gian was younger and quieter; he and my dad spent a lot of time with little robot projects and those LEGO sets and I could tell he missed him.  Mamá was lonely at home, too; she and my dad had been together since high school.  She had spent a lot of time taking care of him, despite her working 60 hour weeks.

A few of my dad’s sisters hung around as moral support, but Papá eventually pressured them until they stopped coming to see us.  However, there was an additional isolated party within our vicinity who also needed a group of humans to latch onto; someone with the capacity to fill the role of both quasi-paternal figure (figure, not role model), and platonic spouse.

I’d seen Ransom with Mrs. Drysdale; at best, she spoiled her son.  At worst, she placated him with money, demeaned and dismissed him.  Even I didn’t appreciate how she treated him and most days I didn’t like him.  After graduating last in his class from Yale, Ransom took the year off to get away from her. Not a normal “take the year off” where you travel to learn about yourself, or work, or anything like that. Instead, Ransom bought property in the Maldives and imported $500,000 worth of Dom Perignon—the Rose Gold kind—, and flew in ballerinas from Moscow while telling his mom he was joining the Peace Corps for a girl.  When there was fraud on his black AmEx and he had to phone home for help, there was hell to pay when the call came from not Mongolia.  Linda cut him off and kicked him out.

For six months, but still.  This was Ransom.

My mother, bless her heart, would have absorbed all children needing a home if she could.  And, though he was 21, Ransom definitely qualified as such a child.  I honestly think Ransom needed the mothering, too. Growing up with a nanny paid to give you care is not a replication of a mother’s love, which he never had in the first place.

Ransom always showered Mamá with attention, asking how she was with utter sincerity while maintaining direct eye contact, thanking her for the work she did as a cardiac surgeon, and other general sycophantic niceties.  I was terrified that would change for the worst after he moved in, despite their generous age gap.  A freshly divorced woman could’ve been new prey for him.  It wasn’t that she didn’t know who and what he was—she was under no illusions.  But she had a soft spot for the broken bad boy with mommy issues and indulged him.

I watched him like a hawk when he was around her, but he never made a move.  He certainly let her wait on him; she cooked him food from scratch and listened to him talk while she cleaned up the kitchen, but he was never salacious.  I still give him props for that.  It would have been an entertaining game for him, one he would’ve easily won.  

It helped that he was gone half the time.  He still had his car, keys to the Hamptons house and access to his friends’ jets and properties.   I’m pretty sure Richard was also slipping him $50k a month because Ransom rebuilt his wardrobe pretty quickly.

I will admit I was slightly… antagonistic towards him during the beginning of his time with us.  I may have picked a few fights.  He wanted to watch Sin City because of Jessica Alba; I wanted to watch the Corpse Bride.  He left questionable-looking hair trimmings in the shower drain and you can bet I was pounding on his door.  He gave me that look when I thought I had dressed nicely, and I may or may not have launched myself at him.  But, near the middle of his stay, we learned to co-exist, and even had some decent conversations.  I chilled out when I saw how he was with Gian.  

I’m not sure Mamá ever officially asked Ransom to step up while he was living with us, I think the only conditions she had was that he tip the cleaning people an extra $150 for how bad his room was, not have his douchey friends over past 10pm, and no sleepovers with the opposite sex.  But, it was obvious to everyone under our roof that Gian looked to Ransom for companionship.  And, to my utter surprise, Ransom kind of delivered.  He took Gian to the U.S. Open and up to Lake Champlain to golf a few times, and they’d hang out at the house when Ransom was home.  

Then, one day I heard him call Gian his charity project to his friends as they sat out on the porch.  The second he came inside I punched him in the arm over that.  The weirdest part about Ransom and his awful behavior is that he only kinds of means it.  I mean, the idea was there, he had had the thought that Gian was less fortunate than him and needed his help.  But I also know he genuinely loved my little brother and was making spending time with him out to be a bigger deal than it really was.

Six months to the day, Ransom had a moving company at our doorstep at 8am sharp.  He only had a few hanging wardrobes worth of clothes to move into his new apartment; all of the furniture was being delivered by the dealer, but the man couldn’t lower himself to drive his own U-Haul.  By that time, I had developed an appreciation for Ransom.  It was kind of nice to have someone older to talk to, even though he had no conception of what real life was like.  He was okay.  I didn’t miss sharing a dwelling space with him, but I did kind of miss him.

 Boston, Fall 2009

 That fall, I was 18 and a senior at the Winsor School and Ransom was 25 and bullshitting his way through his Master’s of Science in Business Analytics at Princeton.  I preferred not to ask questions regarding his attendance or grades.  I figured the less I knew, the less I could be implicated in some scandal involving the university and bribery.

High school wasn’t a great time in my life. The kids at Winsor were spoiled and came from generations of overachievers.  You could say there were a lot of Ransoms, I suppose; self-serving, arrogant, brutal, conceited, rich kids.  I’m not saying I didn’t share some of those traits, I knew I was fortunate, but I liked to think I was a decent person.  As a result, I was relatively lonely.  I had the varsity tennis team, and that fit my basic  need for socialization.  But not once did I ever entertain the thought of a boyfriend.

As the years progressed, I waited for the mutual attraction for my peers to arrive.  It never did. At that age, even if boys had adopted the air of sophistication they had seen modeled at home and had the ability to charm, they severely lacked in a different department, like intelligence or maturity.  I shut down every advance without a second thought and didn’t look back.

Until, that is, my Senior year.  As leaving home was becoming a reality, I decided I didn’t want to go to college a virgin.  I just didn’t.  Things happen in college, things you don’t always have control over, and I liked control.  I liked control very much.  And I wanted to have control over when and how I gave it up.  And I wasn’t giving it up to some 18 year old I had dated for a three months who couldn’t kiss and also didn’t have the experience to help me enjoy the process.

But I knew someone who did.

I smirked as a key sounded in the lock, Ransom had never given his back from a few years ago.

“Ol?” his voice echoed up the stairs.

“In the kitchen!”

The old stairs creaked as he ascended, heading straight for the refrigerator without even looking at me.

“Hey,” he nodded in greeting.

“Hey.”  For the first time in my life, I was nervous talking to him.  I’d texted him, asking if he could stop by, which wasn’t out of character.  He usually popped in at least once a month to return a book, pick up a sweater he forgot that my mom had washed or have dinner with us.  He lingered, even after moving out.  The flight from Princeton to Boston was only an hour, and it meant a lot to Gian, to all of us, really, that Ransom still visited.

While Ransom dug through the fridge, pulling out some leftover chorizo, I set about throwing together some protein smoothies for us.  He had left a container of ridiculously expensive something something collagen protein at our house the last time he was there and it was expiring soon, so I split the remainder between us.  Out of the corner of my eye I saw him fuss with the microwave.

I raised a brow.  “You know how to use kitchen appliances?”

He took an exaggerated bite of a sausage slice. “Selectively,” he winked.

I bit my cheek to keep from laughing.  Ransom’s “selective” helplessness didn’t need encouragement.

I think what we worked in was companionable silence, but I’m not positive.  I was pretty geared up, so it was hard to tell.  Settling at the table, I laid plates out for both of us, chewing my lip.

“I have a favor to ask.”

“I can’t get you into Yale early decision, but I can get you in,” he said as he reached for his smoothie.

I rolled my eyes.  “I’ve already gotten into Brown on my own, which was my first choice, thank you. What I need is… different.”

“What is it?  I’ve got cash with me.”

“Ransom!  Listen to me. Just let me ask my question.”

“Okay!” he chuckled, his eyes gleaming as he swirled his glass.

“Okay,” I repeated, my heart pounding in my chest. I made myself look him in the eye. All of a sudden I wanted to cry? What if he said no?  What if he laughed?  What if he never talked to me again?

“Ol, you’re getting pale.  You look like you’re about to ask me to skin a cat.”

“Shut up,” I grumbled, seconds away from losing my nerve. I inhaled deeply, folding my hands on the table in front of me and sitting up straight.

“Ransom,” I began.

“Olivia,” he countered, his face comically serious.

“I want you to take my virginity.  Now that I’m 18—.”

“Hah—You what?  No you don’t, Olivia, you don’t—.”

“I do.”

“Ehhhh,” he made a pained face and shook his head.  “I mean, what do you mean by virginy? What have you done before?”

“Nothing.”

“But you’ve given head though, right?”

I tried to mask my embarrassment with a look of disdain.

When Ransom gaped in surprise, I kicked him under the table.

“A handjob?”

“I said nothing,” I bit out.

The corner of his mouth pulled upward and he tilted his head, his eyes narrowing.  “What about like… getting off with each other?”

I shook my head.  

“Sexting?”

“There’s no one I want to sext.”

He sighed and rubbed his eyes.

“But like…”

“I’ve never touched or been touched, Ransom.  I’ve never seen a man naked, okay?”

He sighed.  “I don’t do virgins.  It’s a personal policy.  Especially someone like you who has absolutely no experience.”

That stung, but I kept trying.  “Do you have a girlfriend?”

“No—.”

“Are you dating anyone?”

“Ol, I don’t date—.”

“Ransom, this is exactly the type of arrangement you want!” I hissed.

“This should be something you do with a boyfriend, someone your age who you care about and who cares about you.”

I groaned and stormed into the living room, plopping into an easy chair.  

“I don’t want a boyfriend.  I’m going to Brown in the fall, so dating someone now would be pointless. And in Providence, between Chi Omega, studying, volunteering, and AMSA, I just won’t have time for a relationship.”

Ransom couldn’t suppress a laugh as he tailed after me.  “You’re as heartless as I am.”

“I’m not heartless,” I argued.  “I’m practical.”

He gave me a patronizing smile.  “You’ve never done this before, you don’t know how you’ll feel afterwards.  It’s sex. Girls get attached.  I just can’t do that, babe.”

"You can!  Ransom, you can.  I won’t get attached.  I’ll leave you alone after.  I won’t text you for a month.  Please? I—,” my cheeks flamed as I looked down at my hands.  Bickering and bantering with Ransom was easy.  Acting like I disliked him was easy.  But being vulnerable with him?  That was terrifying.  “I want it to be you,” I whispered.  “I don’t trust anyone else.”

With a sigh, he perched on the arm of my chair.

“I’m going back to Princeton on Sunday.  Even if we did it tonight, we wouldn’t have 48 hours together.”

“I don’t care!” I slapped the seat of the chair. “What if—what if I get roofied and lose it to some guy and don’t even remember it?  Or—or someone, you know… one in every four women faces sexual assault in college…”

That perpetual, devious gleam in Ransom’s eyes disappeared.  Something brutal and vicious replaced it.

  “I’d kill him.  I’d kill anyone who touched you like that.”

My chest tightened.  I’d never seen him that serious before, not even when he argued with his mom.  It was a little terrifying.  But, I had carried pepper spray on me for years since moving to the city and I already knew my parents were sending me to college with a SipChip, not that I’d be going to parties anyway.  I tried another angle.

  “I know I’m not the girls you normally sleep with—blonde, white, with yachts and horses and trust funds—

Darkness cast over his face.

“Olivia,” he interrupted.  Brow creasing, Ransom lifted his hand near my face, then hesitated. With a growl, he cupped my jaw. “You’re beautiful,” he murmured, brushing the knuckle of the opposite hand against my cheek.  “And trust funds are so mundane.”

I rose from the chair and leaned against his leg. “Then why don’t you want me?”  It took everything in me to keep my voice from breaking.

Ransom shifted uneasily, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Ol, I’ve known you since you were a kid.  I can’t—I just don’t see you that way.”

“You still see me as a child?”

“I guess, yeah.”

Butterflies flapped madly in my belly, but I held my breath and stepped forward between his legs until our chests were pressed together, trapping my hand between us at his groin.  Praying that I applied what I had read correctly, I timidly felt for his cock. He grunted when I wrapped my hand around the outline of its shape and followed it with a shy stroke.

“I am not a child,” I husked in my best seductress voice.

“You said you’d never touched or been touched,” he accused through clenched teeth.

Both proud and embarrassed, I ducked my head. “I don’t like entering a situation unprepared.  I read a lot and watched some videos.”  Realizing the implications of my statement, I turned beet red.  “For research, I mean!”

That earned me a genuine smile.  Sliding one hand around my waist he pulled me closer, then used the other to firmly guide my palm over his half erect cock, rubbing it back and forth.  I blushed as I felt him harden under my fingers.

“What else did you research?”

"Stuff,” I mumbled.

Rubbing his thumb along my hipbone, his gaze fell to his lap, watching my hand work over his erection.  Then his eyes deviated to my front, trailing up my belly to my chest, which was, admittedly, heaving, and slowly made their way to my face. Looking someone in the eye had never made me clench down there before.  It was unexpected, but not unappreciated.

I could see Ransom thinking, his eyes flicking back and forth between mine as he reasoned with himself.

“You need to think this over, you need to really consider what you’re asking me and decide that’s what you want,” he murmured, his voice rough.

My pussy throbbed at the sound, and it took extra concentration not to let my eyes close.

“When have I ever made a rash decision about something this important?  I started thinking about this a year ago.”

He exhaled a laugh, shaking his head.  “Of course you did.”

When his hips gave an involuntary thrust against my palm, he gently pulled my wrist away.

“That’s enough for now.”

Tears pricked at the corner of my eyes.  “Did I do it wrong?  Is that a no?”

He massaged his closed eyelids with his index finger and thumb, exhaling shakily.  “It should be a no.  A good man would say no.”  

Drawing me against him once more, I whimpered as he ground his cock against my belly.  “But I’ve never been a good man, have I, Olivia?”

He didn’t give me an opportunity to respond. The kiss was firm, but delicate. No tongues or biting or slipping or sliding, just lips pressed together, gently massaging.  When he sucked at my lower lip I surprised both of us with a soft moan, causing him to bury his hand in my hair and tilt my head for better access.

I completely lost track of everything, because the next moment of consciousness I had was gasping for air as he pulled away. My fingers were tangled in his hair, my hand clutching his sweater like it was a lifeline, and his thigh was situated between both of mine, applying pressure to my clit that was making me see stars.  Now my mouth was wet, but I didn’t care.

Once I could see straight, I dove for his mouth again, but he stopped me with an unyielding grip on my chin.

“Change,” he rumbled.  “We’ll go to dinner at Menton, I’ll pull some strings and get us a table.  Then back to my apartment.”

I squinted, still reeling from the kiss. “We’re not going to Menton first, that makes it sound like a date.  This isn’t a date, we have one mission to accompli—.”

He gaze grew cold.  “If we do this, we’re doing it my way.  You’re going to listen to me.  I’m in charge.”

My eyes flicked back and forth between his as my entire face and neck glowed pink.  

“Okay,” I whispered.

“Say ‘Yes, sir,’” he corrected me.

“Yes, sir,” I repeated softly.

The pleased smile that spread across his lips gave me a warm feeling in my belly.

“Tonight, I’m going to destroy your pussy,” he whispered against my ear, sucking at my lobe, “I’m going to make you come like a whore.”  Moving to my other side, he spoke softly again, his warm breath against my cheek making me shiver.  “Your future husband will resent me for the rest of your lives, because I’m going to ruin you for any other man.”  Nuzzling my nose with the tip of his, he kissed the corner of my mouth.  “And you’re going to love it.”

I couldn’t help myself.  I was throbbing, there was pressure building in my belly and the man had barely laid a hand on me.  With a high pitched whimper, I sought his mouth again, but he wrapped his huge hand around my throat and shook his head as he held me back.

“Go.  Pick out something nice to wear.  Something you feel pretty in.”

Mouth dry, I nodded.  He caught my arm as I went to leave.

“And Olivia?  Not a scrap of clothing underneath.”