#d-tools cloud

[schemelin]

hello! I love your art sm and I was wondering what are some really important tips you think are important for new artists to keep in mind? Also if u ever get art block how do you deal with it?

hello!!!

tips for art include:

a. keeping your tools and art materials clean, properly stored and tidy by sorting them in pencil holders and boxes. make sure your brushes are dry/reshaped and your pencils sharpened. DON'T MIX ALL OF THEM IN THE SAME CASE. trust me, it WILL make a difference in the future.

b. tracing IS effective so long you do it properly and don't repost traced/stolen content online claiming it as yours. Justladders has done a wonderful analysis on why tracing is a powerful tool, why you should do it, and why we must encourage other artists to do it. Go check it!!!

c. learning art doesn't have to be tedious and frustrating. it is true that you can't escape the hardships, but you can at least treat yourself more kindly. put on some music while you draw. have this google drive folder containing books on anatomy and much more by Michel Lauricella for free. check this flickr link for background and character design by Adam Adamowicz (this is personal favorite hehe) also for free. make yourself as many inspirational pinterest folders as you need. grab a chair and go draw outside. i'm not telling you to draw trees and clouds, i'm telling you to leave your room/desk for a while. your brain needs fresh air to work properly.

d. stop putting yourself down when you look at someone else's art — convert those self-deprecating thoughts into inspiration. always love what you do, even if it doesn't appeal to you at first. talking oneself down has never once driven anyone forward out of will.

e. be embarassing. be so fucking cringe it hurts your innards. draw your favorite character over and over and over and over and over and over and over and ov

AS FOR ART BLOCK. i've learned to accept that it is part of the creative process, so i can't feel guilty for "not making any progress". if i can't make art, means it's time for a break. eat something, drink water, socialize, read a book, make a new spotify playlist, and play video games. i can go on like that for days. some people won't draw for weeks, or even months. everyone works differently, and there's never a proper time to go back.

hope this helps 👍💜

[reversedpineapple]

Your yandere profiles are so well written! Please a blade one I beg 🙏

Ehehehe Anon, no need to beg. You ask and I shall serve, 。(⌒∇⌒。)

Anyways, I hope you enjoy this. I tossed so many drafts I thought I would never get this done. Maybe it’s my sleep deprived brain talking but I am pretty happy how his characterisation turned out.

─═✧═─ 𝕐𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕖𝕣𝕖 ℙ𝕣𝕠𝕗𝕚𝕝𝕖: 𝔹𝕝𝕒𝕕𝕖 ─═✧═─

¸.•° Yan!Blade x Reader °•.¸

TWs: Obsessive behavior, imprisonment, paranoia, unhealthy relationship, description of death, unstable partner, description of bodily harm, description of body parts being removed

Comments, likes and reblogs are always appreciated. :D

ٜ۪ꥇ໋۬ Word count: 1.9k ٜ۪ꥇ໋۬

By continuing to read beyond this point, you have agreed to the trigger warnings and to be at least of the age of 18. The author does not hold any responsibility whatsoever for your actions.

Blades infatuation is beyond understanding

For Blade to fall for you, you would need to be someone who is familiar, safe, soothing. This does not mean that you would need to know him before “the event”. In fact, if you knew him back then, he would not even look at you twice, his head now only filled with the mad whispers of Mara. You would need to be someone whom he met after all of that. Maybe you could be someone who accepted money from the Stellaron Hunters in exchange of a safe room on a regular basis, hidden from the law enforcement of your planet or an informant. Perhaps you are even one of them yourself whether your part being fighting on the front line or supporting Elio behind the scenes. Anyways, you work together with him on a regular basis. That’s the first step and I may add, one of many. Every action Blade takes is to push others away. Despite claiming to be a tool for Elio so he could finally find peace, he is very capable of feeling emotions. They mostly surface whenever he meets Dan Heng or another member of the former High-Cloud Quintet.

It’s easier for Blade to catch romantic feelings should you be a person who does not fight. It’s not impossible if you are with them on missions but it would just remind him of a certain group… well, as much as he is capable of remembering. Something is poking at the back of his mind and he does not like it. Most of the time Blade remembers something from his past; it's an indicator for his descent into madness so he avoids things like these as much as he can. Like already said, it’s not impossible, it just takes a lot longer for him to see you as more than someone he has to work with. In any case, do not try to be some overly nice person. Despite being cold, Blade is still as polite as he can muster whilst being in agony. He does not need someone trying to butter him up. Just be as normal as possible and all will be nice and well.

The man will keep his distance, that is just part of who he is. It does not matter if you have known each other for a long or a short time. Blade can’t say what it is or why it’s even there but sometimes it feels like there is a man with white hair poking through the anger and madness of Mara. During the rare times that happens, he will be of clearer mind than usual. It’s also during that time that he thinks about his current life and how to achieve his goal of peace. The closer together you grow though, the more times you will also invade his thoughts during these moments. You will not be the subject of a long line of thought, just a small sentence slipping in. When he thinks about the missions, he will remember Silver Wolf and how she mentioned that you liked that drink she saw a vendor sell. Strange… he would usually not remember things like that. Blade may repress his emotions but he is very in touch with himself. He will definitely realise that he feels more for you than the others. For him to come to the conclusion that it is romantic affection will take some time though.

When he finally does, he will not tell you anything. There are just too many things going on in his life right now for him to focus on something like that. Example being taking revenge and finally finding peace. For now. Perhaps it’s a tiny spark of his humanity surviving in his Mara struck mind but over time, he feels himself yearning. At first, it’s not much. As an example, we can take him remembering your favourite drink but now he also wants to get it for you, to see your thankful smile after seeing that he thought of you. Over time, things like that will pile up. What was once the simple urge to do something for you turns into utter devotion. Blade does not have much happiness in his life after everything that happened so when you gradually start to turn into the light of his life, he will find himself willing to exist just a bit longer if it pleases you. During all of this you won’t even know that he feels that way. Yes, Blade acts a lot closer with you than with the others, although he is still pretty silent when around you, but it comes across like something akin to friendship.

It depends on whether you have romantic feelings or not. Blade would need Kafkas help to pinpoint whether that is the case, the woman happily giving him hints since his debacle serves her as a wonderful source of entertainment. Should you not want more than companionship from him, then he will continue to act as your slightly distant friend. He just has already way too much drama in his life and does not want to add more onto that by forcing you into a relationship. There is also a small part of him that couldn’t bear it if your gaze should turn from trust to fear. If you show signs of romantic affection though, he will carefully approach you. It is to note though that Blade is not someone who would do something like confessing to you upfront. Like those kind gestures of thinking of you he will start to slowly creep more into your life. After half a year you will slowly start to realise how much more time he spends with you. Not that you mind. Despite his silent demeanour he is good company. Things that could be considered something close to acts of romantic affection slowly bleed into your life. Like when you accidentally dropped a glass and he caught it, handing it to you and holding your hand a bit too long or that one time when you were chopping vegetables and he leaned over your shoulder to see if he could help, his chest slightly brushing against your shoulder.

He gets a bit closer, a bit more affectionate with you every time you two see each other but in such subtle ways that you don’t even realise that. Blade does not call or text you casually. Whenever you meet it will be in the confines of whatever mission he has to fulfil which makes the time you spend with each other so much more precious. Blade does not want to risk getting you into trouble even in the slightest bit so he forces himself to endure, his affection growing beyond what should be humanly possible until one day he holds your waist, his other pressing a kiss against the back of your hand. In that moment, you ask yourself how you never noticed the burning gaze he only throws at you. His lips not pulling away from the skin of your hand, them slightly ghosting over it, a silent prayer expressed in a language without words. A prayer to see him and only him, to be his sun, to have pity on the man who fell so so deeply for you. Blade doubts he could continue to hang on even a millisecond longer should you turn his affection down.

From that day on, he will not hold back from showing his affection any longer. Don’t expect great poems of love from him or confessions boldly proclaimed. Blades love is silent, he never told you vocally how he feels and yet you always know. Every single action he does in your presence is to show you how much he adores you, how he would it would break and torture his mind should something happen to you. It does not matter whether the task you are doing is small or one of greater effort. The second he sees you doing something he will be there to assist you, a gentle press of his lips against the skin of your hands if at least one of his own is free. The action brings such a peace to his mind he thought to be impossible. One thing uncharacteristically he does is laying his head on your lap and enjoying your presence. Should you brush through his strands he would swear that he was the first person to be cured of the Eon of Abundances affliction, the Mara coming to a halt and his head finally clear. This is his own little piece of heaven, the sword oh so inseparable from his side leaning against your door. He dislikes the idea of fighting in your presence but he is also aware that slip ups can happen. For all he knows, a well angered security camera was able to pick his trail up this time, the law enforcement of your planet already on their way.

Good things never last. Blade is capable of suppressing the darker desires he has for you, to gouge out your eyes so only he remains in your memories, to chain you forever to his side. The last thing he wants is for you to fear him. Please, not you, not his sun in the sky but even he has his limits. Blade heard something snap when he saw the blood dripping from your body. He will not react like this should you accidentally hurt yourself, things happen after all but when someone intentionally harms you he sees no longer any reason to hold back. He will of course not act upon the darkest of his desires, the ones already mentioned but you will need to say goodbye to your life in freedom. A month later and he will tell you to pack your bags, his tone of voice clearly telling you that this was not something you could voice your opinion on. His eyes are hardened, telling you that it would not take much to tip him into a frenzy. So you obey.

In the short time, the man will have prepared a small safe house in the middle of nowhere, the furniture and layout as close as possible to your old home. There is one glaring difference though, there are a lot more key holes in the front door and the windows are made out of thick, tempered glass which are also not able to be opened widely. Blade will take good care of you, he truly does! You will never need food, entertainment is also brought to you but he will not give you tools to communicate with the outside world. Should you try to somehow trick him into giving you his phone, he will come by the next time without it. He knows the other Stellaron Hunters can handle themselves just fine so he doesn’t need to be available all the time but apparently you can’t. Why can’t you understand that the world is not a kind place? Eons trample upon human life like it’s worth nothing, he would know. The Abundance has taken so much from him and he refuses to let the same thing happen to you too. That one time you were lucky, only a small cut marring your skin but what if the next time he finds you lifelessly laying on the ground, a puddle of red steadily forming around your form?

Blade swears it’s the Mara talking, it twisting his thoughts once more but one day you will age, grow old… leave him behind… Surely you can withstand becoming a long-life species. He was able to hang on for a long time before meeting Kafka and if you should fall into madness, he would still love you all the same.

Do not copy, translate or use my work without my permission. All rights belong to the author.

[cripplecharacters]

Hi! I’m a hearing person currently doing research to write a short story where the main character is deaf. While reading your pinned post, I saw you advised against using italics.

“If you really want to differentiate signing from speaking, you can use italics or different dialogue marks, but I advise against that.”

I’m curious why you advise against it and I’d like to know more. The character in my story is postlingually hard of hearing (he has moderate hearing loss after an accident ((not present in the story))) and sometimes has to speak with other characters in order to communicate. When signing, I had the dialogue in italics and when speaking I had the dialogue with quotation marks.

Could this be seen as offensive? Or is it simply a tool for helping readability? Below are some examples from my writing. I’d also like to clarify that although the protagonist is deaf, the focus on the story is on his love interest, on his rivalry with another character, and on the severe thunderstorm they get trapped in.

Examples:

While he was lost in their ominous blue glow, Lilly tapped him on the shoulder.

Want to play tag? She signed.

Max balanced his book on the railing before replying. No, I like it up here.

…

Lilly looked out on the prairie. She, too, found herself focusing on the clouds. Those look kind of scary. I thought it wasn’t supposed to rain?

It’s not, Max replied.

…

“So, Maximus,” Jackson started. “What’re you reading?”

“Nothing,” Max said curtly.

End examples.

Thank you for your help. Although I’m looking at many websites/organizations to try and understand the Deaf community, it’s useful to have personal insight into the preferences and opinions of individuals.

Hi!

So in my opinion, italics devalue sign language. Spoken language gets the "proper" common quotation marks, even in books where characters switch back and forth between multiple spoken languages, while italics are marked as distinctly "other". It's not a connection I like.

I'm also not the ultimate authority on how to write d/Deaf characters. I'm sure there are Deaf people out there who would disagree with me. And if it is necessary for clarity, by all means use an alternate style for writing sign language dialogue! It's not offensive, italics are just a stylization I and some other people I know don't love.

Mod Rock

[emcapi-gaming]

i am back on my tinfoil hat bullshit

ok so i know "x is a shard of y" theories are totally overdone but unfortunately i have a very specific flavor of autism that makes me go bonkers over similarities between characters

and i will be honest i'm putting a lot less stock in this one than the Wuk Lamat/Sphene theory in terms of how sure I am that I'm right, but! hear me out! (also even if this turns out to be absolutely nothing, i may still roll with it as a headcanon just for fun :3)

"but emcapi," you say, "they literally just look alike because they're both face 4 fem elezen!"

yes, i do fully admit this one might just be a coincidence!

but it's a really fun coincidence :D

additional points (thank you, Garland Tools, for enabling my tinfoil-hatting):

exact same iris color

exact same lipstick color

same bangs! (which I honestly didn't even realize until I put them side by side)

Now, narratively, this would actually explain a great deal about Shale getting pulled into the Main Character Squad at lightning (har har) speed. Which is that, specifically, I'm 97.5% sure that our next expac is going to be a joint Meracydia/Southern Seas + Void expansion.

Why I'm so convinced:

Fits with "patches playing setup for the second-next expac" pattern: see also, Doman refugees in ARR patches -> Stormblood, Warriors of Darkness in HW patches -> Shadowbringers.

We have very obviously not seen the last of Zero (I MISS MY WIFE, TAILS)

We are SOOOOOO obviously going to Meracydia it's not even funny.

It's like the only destination on Emet-Selch's itinerary we still haven't hit up.

AND we had all that business with the Milallas coming from the South Seas, and using the Mysterious Hourglass to do it, which OBVIOUSLY warrants some investigation.

Huuuge connection between Meracydia + Void via the war with the Allagans (which is how Azdaja got stuck in the Void in the first place)

With the context of all the other hints, specifically having Cloud of Darkness as the first chaotic raid is making me go 🤔🤔🤔 another hint, perhaps?

IN CONCLUSION: i have max brainrot debuff stacks BUT i am definitely on to something with the next expac, and i am either on to something or have made a VERY fun new headcanon with Shale and Cyella/Cylva.

[cinnamoonblue]

Chapter I | Escape

Summary: Being an artist was your life purpose and you figured it out at a very young age. No one was surprised when you quickly made a name of yourself among the art communities around the world. Everything was going according to your life’s plan, until you were diagnosed with a life changing condition - Parkinson's disease. Since that day everything started to slowly collapse for you. Looking for an escaping, moving to a small, forgotten from the world sea coast town was the only solution you could think off. Buying an old beach house, which was screaming for renovation, was the greatest escape - until you met your annoying next door neighbour and his dog. A neighbour who had his own issues and demons to deal with but somewhere between the pain and the obstacles life has thrown to both of you, you found comfort in each other. All because he had the right colour of blue paint for your staircase banister.

Main characters: Portgas D Ace x Reader (female)

Description: Modern AU | Early 40s retired Captan!Ace and Artist!Reader

WARNINGS: ALL CHARACTERS ARE AGED UP, major age gap between Reader and Ace (!sixteen years!), 18+ only, angst, hurt/no comfort, family trauma, emotional distress, !mentions of Parkinson's disease!, mentions of depression, explicit language, english is not my first language

Word Count: 7,5K

<- prologue | main masterlist | story masterlist | next chapter ->

NOTE: I WANT TO APOLOGIES FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART THAT THIS TOOK TWO MONTHS TO BE UP , I AM SORRY! I promise you the next chapters won’t take as long to be up, there were just a lot of personal things going on and I couldn’t focus on writing as much as I wanted to. I have such big hopes for this story and I really hope that you guys won’t give up on it and be patient with me while I write it. There is more I want to say but I will leave it for the end note, so ENJOY ♡

It  turns out everywhere you go‚ you take yourself‚ that's not a lie

The road in front of you seems endless. Both front windows of the car are rolled down as you let the heavy ocean air mixed with the pine trees surrounding the road fill up the air in the vehicle. The sky is becoming more greyish, indicating that the rain is coming sooner than the weather forecast has announced it last night. But you are not worried about it as the air, mixed with view in front of you, brings you some kind of peace and a sign that today will go as you have plan it.  

You have driven for five hours and only made one quick stop at a gas station to fill up the car with fuel, not even bothering to use the toilet or buy yourself some snack for the long journey ahead of you, but you don’t feel the need to do any of it.

The past nine months have taken a big tool on you – from being on top of your own little world to massively fall down in a matter of seconds, all you desperately need is a change. A big change.  

Glancing at the GPS on the car, a small smile appears on your lips as you see that soon you will be arriving at your destination. “Seven must be my lucky number.” You whisper to yourself.

Six is the number of houses you have already looked at and they were not what you are looking for, so hopefully seven is your lucky number. Hopefully today will be the day which you can mark as your new beginning.

You want to start fresh and clean – away from everyone and everything. You have been in a desperate need of escape. The past few months have clouded your mind and heart with sorrow, pity and anger – something that you have never allowed to feel towards yourself, and you are tired of it. If life plans to throw more and more rocks towards you and your way so let it be, but you won’t let it bring you down more than you already are. Life has started to take your passion and meaning of it away from you the moment it has thrown the disease, that you are still in denial off, in your way. But until your hands are no longer capable of holding the brush and your body hasn’t betrayed you – you will fight for your happiness and peace.

The last few moths have opened your eyes for many things and set your mind on others. You are planning on learning how to be indifferent, mostly because of how tired you are. Tired of being there for everyone, yet no one is there for you except your sister, but you can’t bother her with your life and problems; after all she has a whole family to take care of and you are a grown woman who is finally free to do whatever her heart desires, with no one around you to tell you anymore how to behave or act around people and situations.  

You haven’t realised you have entered the small coast town, until you stop at a red light on a crossroad. You blink a few times as you can’t believe it. When have you passed the town entrance sign without even realising it? A long honk behind you made you jump on your seat. Looking up at the traffic light, it has changed to green which means you are holding the line, but before you can react, it changes back to red. You raise your right hand in the air to signal to the driver behind you that you are sorry, but you couldn’t see their face in the front mirror as their car, a dark grey car truck to be more specific, is higher than yours. In your attempts to see the driver and apologies somehow, you have missed the green light again which obviously pissed the person behind the wheel as they honk at you once more and this time, they kept on going without stopping it.

“Oh my God, what an asshole, stop honking.” You stick out your head of the window of your driver seat and screamed at the person who’s face you still can’t see. This is getting you stressed and pissed at the same time. You are aware that it’s your fault, but can’t they be a bit more patient. Focusing yourself on the traffic light ready to take off the second it turns to green, the dark grey truck angrily manoeuvres around you and before you have the chance to see who the angry impatient person behind the wheel is, they are long gone. All that you have managed to see is an adorable golden retriever happily having its head out of the passenger seat.

“What an idiot. There could be children walking around.” You exclaim in disbelief.

Baterilla – the smallest coast town in the east coast, if not in the whole country. The current population is four thousand four hundred forty-six people. By all means some people would even call this place a village, but by the official state of the country it is a town – a forgotten from the rest of the world town. Driving through the streets of it until you reach your final stop, you also observe the place around you. For a small, almost uninhabited town, it has a lot of houses, which would inhabit more than four thousand people, all of them painted in light pastel colours, but mostly white, making the place very welcoming and delightful for the eyes. Passing by the main street by the beach your breath is taken away – there are many small shops for all kinds of things with small restaurants and caffes every few meters. They are in the typical white and blue colour palette, with a bit of a red popping then and there, for a coastline town. Most of them are closed and you start to wonder why? Why this town seems so big, yet it’s almost ghost like? It isn’t only the beauty of the colours and the view around it, but the ocean breeze mixed with it all, is making this place straight out of some romantic movie, making you fall in love with it immediately.

When you started to look for a house to buy you have told your real estate agent that you have only three criteria for the house – to be in a small town and, if possible, away from neighbours; to be right next to the beach; to be an old house in desperate need of renovation. So far none of the houses you have checked have matched your wants, but something in your gut is telling you that today is your day and you haven’t had this feeling in a long time.

You have to drive around five more minutes before you reach your final stop – the house you are having a look at today with your agent. Seeing her car parked on the driveway in front of it makes you feel thrilled. To add to your excitement, you have noticed that all the houses close by are far away from the one you will be looking at, and there are also no parked cars in front of them which means no one lives there and that they are probably summer villas, which won’t be a big problem for you. All houses except for one, the house exactly less than a three meters away next to yours, hopefully soon to be home. But there is no car parked on the driveway so maybe it is also a home some family uses only for the summertime.

Parking on the driveway behind your real estate agent’s car, you take a deep breath before stopping the vehicle entirely. “Seven might be – no, it will be your lucky number.” You say to yourself. Taking one last look at yourself in the front mirror you nod as a gesture of giving yourself a courage to go out and look at the house. Unbuttoning your seatbelt and grabbing your bag from the passenger seat, you finally step out of your car.

Nico Robin - a woman you have met a few years ago in a charity gala with your now ex-fiancé, is standing at the beautiful big white front porch of the house. Her tall and define body is dressed in a nice, and by the looks of it, expensive designer suit in a dark blue colour with small barely visible white vertical line stich on it. Her beautiful black hair is held on a high ponytail with her bands framing her face elegantly. Nico Robin is a woman who screams elegance and class from kilometres away, but her looks are only a bonus to her skills as a real estate agent – after all she is the most demanded and famous one in the country, so having her as an acquaintance is definitely in your advantage.

Walking up the wooden white stairs of the front porch you greet her with a little smile, and she does the same.

“How are you feeling today (Y/N)?” She speaks first. Her toned, but yet warm voice always makes you feel in ease around her, and you wonder if she has this warmness in her tone with every client or she only has it with you.

When you have set your mind on finding a house for yourself, after things with your ex-partner have gone all the way downhill, she was the first person you have contacted when the idea for the house came up in your mind. You still remember her shocked facial expression when you met with her and told her what you were in a search for. “An old beach house, exactly by the beach, crying for renovation in a preferably very small town?” All she got from you was a confident nod and in return as she a deep sigh escaped her lips. “Well, I haven’t had a such weird demand by a buyer in a long time, so – yes, I will help you find your house.”

“I’m excited, have this feeling that this will be the house.” You respond with a genuine smile. Today you have caught yourself smiling quite a lot, something that doesn’t happen frequently for quite some time now.

Robin returns the smile and nods with her head towards the front door of the house to follow her. The house is big and white from the outside with a second floor. Everything inside is mostly made of wood and painted white, which you don’t mind as you are looking for a typical beach house in a first place, though most of the paint is chipped or has gone a bit yellow due to no one taking care of the house. From the moment you enter the house you stepped in a quite spacious hallway, where the stairs to the second floor are, but what caught your attention there is the beautiful old banister. All the paint there is chipped and this itself added such beauty to it.

While Robin is explaining all the details about the house to you, you take a step closer to the banister and run your fingers on it. The chipped white paint feels rough and cold on your fingers, making little scratches on your skin as you continue to observe it carefully. Ideas start to form in your mind about all the possible colours you can paint it if you buy the house.

“Do you want to check out the second floor first?” Robin interrupts your thoughts as she notices that you are not paying her any attention. Shaking your head and taking a step back from the banister, you apologize to Robin for not paying attention and tell her to continue the tour of the house however she wants. “Let’s get upstairs first, I see you really like the banister.” A small giggle escapes her lips as she leads you upstairs.

Getting up the stairs you notice the sound some of the steps make while stepping on them, but you are sure that you will find a way to fix them, after all it is only three steps making this annoying cracking sound, so it shouldn’t be such a big problem.

The upper floor has another spacious hallway which leads to a master bedroom, a guest bedroom and bathroom. Everything here is covered in old floral wallpapers, which you will take down, as none of them are in your liking. But you do fall in love with the master bedroom. It is quite spacious, and the windows are from the celling to the floor facing the beach and the view to it is mesmerizing. You can see the waves, coming one after another, creating this beautiful breathtaking dance of the ocean. Each wave carries itself with such beauty before it disappears once it touches the outline of the sand. The freedom that the ocean cares within itself has aways captured your soul and given you peace. ‘No wonder little girls dream of being mermaids.’ A small smile, which almost reaches your eyes, appears on your face when you remember that you were once a little girl who dreamed of being one.

“It’s a nice view.” Robin says, now standing next to you, enjoying the view herself.

“You like the sea, Robin?” You ask, still lost in your own thoughts, but present in the moment.

“Oh, I love it. I have a beach house myself, best investment in my whole life.” She chuckles. “Come on, let’s get downstairs.”

Robin leads you into the kitchen first. As everything else in the house, it is paint in white colours with some wallpapers on the walls and it is connected with the dinning room. From there you entered the living room, which leads to the back porch of the house thanks to the window door and big windows around it, which leads you straight to the beach. This makes you fall in love with the house even more. Not only the room is spacious, but thanks to all the big windows in it, it is all lighten up by the daylight from the outside and it will be the perfect place to drink your morning coffee in it. The last room you take look at its just an extra room. It is quite big as most rooms in this big and spacious house are. There are big windows from the celling to the floor as in the other rooms, and this can defiantly be your studio room, if you gain the courage to pick up the brush again someday.

While Robin is talking about all the advantages and disadvantages this house has you pay her no attention once again, busy with sketching the rooms you have seen in your mind - from the colours you will use to the last piece of furniture you will need.

“I have one more house, but it’s in the east side of the city. Would you like to see it? It’s way better and it doesn’t need as much renovation as this one does.” Robin knows the look of your face; she has seen it many times in all her buyers. This is the face of a person who has already set their mind on the house they are currently looking at, and they are ready to make a final deal for it.

“No need Robin. I think I have found my house.” A content smile is spread across your face as you tilt your head a bit to look at at her. “How much do they want for it?”

“Thirty thousand.”

“Thirty thousand? But this is such a big house and it’s right on the beach, why is the price so low?” There must be some mistake, it is impossible for a house like this to be priced so low.

“This house has been on the market for alsmot eight years now and no one in their right mind would buy it, as I was saying until now and you didn’t bother to listen to me.” She gives you a knowing glance. “This house has more disadvantages than advantages.”

“It doesn’t matter I will manage with it all.” You nod confidently more to yourself than to the woman standing next to you.

“Please, think about it before making a final call. Even try offering less money, the sellers are probably going to accept it.” It is not only because she knows you, but Robin doesn’t want to sell something that she knows the buyer will regret later. The house might be big and spacious, have an amazing view and lighting, mark all your criteria for what you are looking for, but the amount of time and money you will need to invest in it is not worth it.

“We can offer a lower price, but I want this house. It’s perfect and exactly what I’m looking for.”

The type of person who you are is the one that once they set their mind on something it can not be changed, and this has let you to many great and very bad decisions many times. No matter how hard the woman standing next you try to change your mind, nothing will work, so all she can do is sigh and shrug with her shoulders in defeat.

“I’m warning you from now, don’t call me in a few months crying about how you regret it.”   

It has been a month since you made the final deal for the house. Your real estate agent is still not happy with your decision, but nothing can be undone now as you finally have the keys to it in your hands.

Standing in the middle of the small apartment you have been renting out for a few moths now, you are packing up all the things you will need in your new home with the help of your sister.

“I still can’t believe that you’re moving so far away.” Rebecca exclaims in disbelief as she closes one of the big boxes and wraps it in tape.

“It’s not that far away.” You murmur with a roll of your eyes.

“It’s seven hours car drive. How is this not far away?” Her amber eyes widen at your statement and how calmly you take the situation. She already lives two hours away from you, but adding extra five is a bit too much for her. “And yet, you haven’t even told me why?” She stops her movements and looks at you as you try to ignore her questioning eyes.

“I just need a fresh start.” You quietly answer, but this doesn’t give your sister any satisfaction. There are so many questions she has asked, yet none of them are given an answer, and this pains her. You two have never had secrets from each other, so what have changed? Why have you suddenly become so distant?

“What are you hiding from me (Y/N)?” There is so much pain behind the way she says your name pleadingly for an answer. She knows you like the back of her hand, and she cares for you like no one else does.

“I’m not hiding anything. Why you keep accusing me of hiding something?” Brushing her off like it is nothing only add fuel to your sister’s irritation with you. You are in fact hiding a lot from her, but it is for her own good. Rebecca has a family and problems of her own, you don’t want to add to this. The baggage with your problems and pain is yours to carry.

“Stop lying.” Getting up from the floor she comes closer to where you are sitting on it. “First you break you with the man whose name I don’t even want to say, and thanks God for this.” She puts her hand on top of her chest where her heart is as she breaths out with relief, remembering that you are no longer involved with the cruel man you had been for almost three years. “And still till this day, you aren’t telling me what happened and why you two broke the engagement off.” Her voice starts to raise a bit as she walks back and forth in the living room. “Then even before you broke the engagement something was off with you and still is, but you keep on being stubborn and refusing to speak with me. Me – your sister, the person who is always there for you, and now...” She takes a deep breath as she feels her lip trembling from all the build up tension, she has built up within herself. “Now on top of it all, you hit me last night with a phone call to help you pack, because you are moving six hundred kilometres away... Tomorrow.”

Silence takes over you. Everything your sister is saying is true, but you can’t bring yourself to tell her the truth. You can’t bring yourself to tell her the reason why you and your fiancé broke off the engagement. You can’t bring yourself to tell her that you might be diagnosed with stage one of Parkinson’s disease and that your life is slowly losing its meaning. You can’t bring to tell her that there are days where all you can do is cry and stair into nothingness as dark thoughts run through your mind. You can’t bring yourself to tell her that you are not looking for a new fresh start, and what you are looking for is an escape – an escape from everyone and everything.

Taking a deep breath in before exhaling, you finally grow the courage to look at your sister. “Becca, I’m not ready to speak about it.” This time you don’t lie, and Rebecca can read it on your face.

“Why?” Her voice comes out low and full of hurt, betrayed even. “You know that you can tell me anything. Is that monster threatening you with something?” She comes closer to you and kneels on the floor, taking your hands in hers giving them a gentle squeeze.

“No, no, nothing like this.” You shake your head. “I haven’t heard of him since we broke up, there is nothing to worry about.”

“Then why, no, what is that you are not ready to speak about?” You don’t have the energy for this, at least not now, when you don’t have the answers yourself.

“Becca, could we please finish packing up, because I have the moving company coming early tomorrow morning?” Giving her a pleading look you hope that she will drop the subject and just continue helping with the putting everything away in the boxes.

“Fine.” She answers, feeling defeated and remembering how hard you are to speak with when it comes to emotions and expressing your feeling. If she hasn’t been your sister and knows you so well, she might have thought that you are an emotionally disabled as if it hasn’t been through your art, you barely ever express anything than a smile and a frown. And recently she has noticed that all you do is frowning; a smile is a very rare occurrence, and your laughter... she doesn’t even remember the last time she has been able to hear it.  

Seeing Rebecca turning around and going to pick another box, you relax your shoulders a bit. If she wants to, Rebecca can be as stubborn as you are, after all you are sisters, but she has aways been the one who has been gentler and more compassionate, which is good because otherwise you two might have never been this close.

“By the way, when was the last time you paint something?” Her question catches you by surprise. To be honest you don’t remember. It has been quite long since you have picked the brush in your hands. Maybe ten moths ago, a month before your big exhibition, but you are not very sure. After you have visited doctor Hiriluk and then doctor Kureha, you haven’t touched your paint brushes.

“A few days ago.” You lie without even thinking twice. If you tell her the truth it will only make things worse, and you don’t need this right now.

“Do you mind showing it to me?” She carefully observes your face and body as you slowly nod. You are lying, and Rebecca doesn’t like this. Something is going on and you refuse to tell her, but why?

“Of course, but let’s finish with this first.” You look up at her with a big fake smile spread across your face as you lift one of the many books you have in your hand as a gesture to your sister to remember why she is here in a first place.

You had to wake up very early this morning to let the moving company in and leave your keys to the landlord. Thankfully your landlord, an amazing and sweet mid-sixty man, offered himself to lock after the moving company so you could go ahead and be at the house before them, for which you were more than grateful for and accepted the offer without wasting a second.

Taking a sip of your second coffee for the day, you are now just an hour away from Baterilla, your new home and fresh start. The road has been long once again, but you are almost there. With your windows down you can feel the early spring breeze blazing your skin. Even thought you are quite exhausted from last night, as Rebecca has stayed until quite late to help you and thankfully, by the end of it, out of energy to ask you more questions before she leaves, somehow you feel extremely energized as well. Today should be a good day, as it was the last time you came here. This is your new beginning set on your tempo and rules so what can go wrong?

Apparently, everything can go wrong. Standing on the front porch of your new home you are looking with disbelief all over your face at the men who are supposed to take care of your furniture.

“What do you mean you can’t get them inside?” You gesture with your hand at the furniture spread across the front of the house.

With a deep sigh and an eye roll one of the two men tries to explain to you calmly that there has been some mistake, and they must get back to the city as they have double booked today, and they must take care of their other customer’s furniture.

“So what? You must finish your job here first.” Your patience is wearing thin. They must be joking with you. This can’t be.

“Miss, we must go back, please understand.” The man tries again as his colleague makes his way back to the truck they have come with. “We will be back on Thursday and put your furniture in the house.” Lifting his hands in the air as the problem is being solved, he turns his back to you and starts to make his own way to the truck, but you are quick to follow him as you start walking angrily behind and grab his shoulder to stop him.

“Thursday? Are you crazy?” You yell at his face. “This is in two days! Am I supposed to just leave my things out here for two days?”

“As I said, we are sorry, but we are on a tight schedule, and we must drive five hours back.” His face is blank as a new canvas as he pushes away your hand and gets back in the truck.

“Oh, hell no! You two are not leaving until you get everything inside.” You try to open the door of the truck and get the man out, but his co-worker fast to lock the doors. “I will contact your boss.” Slamming your hand on the door, all you get back in return is another annoyed look and an eye roll from both men.

“Yea, yea miss, please do that.” The man replies rolling his window up as his co-worker starts the truck ready to leave.

You waste not a single second to run to the front of the truck as they are about to leave the driveway. Crossing your arms over your chest you gave them a cocky knowing look that says, ‘What are you going to do about this now?’ with one brow raised high – they can’t escape you.

Or that is what you tell yourself until you see them backing up and manoeuvre around you, leaving you standing in the middle of the street with face full of disbelief. Running after them hoping that they will stop, you just give up.

“Yes, yes – drive away. Assholes! I will demand a refund!” Screaming on top of your lungs as you stop running in the middle of the road, you are trying to catch your breath as the truck drives away. “Fucking assholes.” You whisper turning back around and walking slowly to your house, as your legs feel heavier than usual.

Standing in the middle of the sidewalk right in front of it, you look at all the boxes and furniture, trying to figure out how to get them inside the house all by yourself. Pulling your flip phone out of your back pocket, you dial the moving company number as you are planning to make a big fuss about what has just happened to their boss. After a few rings, the call is finally being answered, and you give no time to the person on the other side of it to even say hello as you snap at them.

“No, no, you listen to me. I will not wait until Thursday for your lazy employees to come and get my furniture in the house as this is an unacceptable behaviour.” You don’t remember the last time being this mad and aggravated. The audacity this company has is through the roof, and you are not having that. “Do you hear yourself?” Your voice is full of disbelief as you place the phone between your ear and shoulder, picking up the smallest boxes you have and start moving them into the house. Not only you must deal with this situation that you are in as of right now, but the weather has changed in a span of seconds and by the looks of it soon is about to start raining.

Heated into the argument you are having with the owner of the moving company, moving back and forth from inside to outside with boxes in your hands, you don’t hear nor see the dog who has run in your direction and before you know it you are laying on the ground with all of the things you are carrying spread around as you are trying to process what has just happened.

“Max, bad boy! Stop!” A male voice yells behind you.

Trying to get back on your feet you felt your hands starting to get stiff. “No, no, no. Not now, please, not now.” Whispering in fear your eyes focus on them. This can’t be happening right now. Taking a deep breath in you try to move slowly your fingers hoping that the stiffness will go away fast. “Come on, come on.”

“Hey, did you get hurt? Do you need help?” Hearing the same male voice, but now so much closer to you, you tilt your head at the direction where it comes from. Glancing up at him your eyes are met with a deep dark shade of brown ones. “I’m so sorry about Max. He just ran towards you the moment he saw you and didn’t listen to me.” The man chuckles awkwardly as he runs a hand through his raven black messy hair.

You are about to respond when you hear a bark. The dog who caused your fall, runs by next to the man and stands by his owner’s leg.

“Bad boy, Max.” The man scolds the dog as it sadly looks down at the ground. Looking back at you and seeing you still on the ground without moving he raises a brow. “Hey, you okay? You need hel-”

“I’m fine.” You cut him off fast as the last thing you need today is a pity from some stranger.

“You sure ‘bout that?” He replies, crouching to get a better view of you. Turning your face at him with a frown, the man is a bit taken aback. He doesn’t think that he has seen such a beautiful woman before in his life, let alone someone to make his breath caught up in his lungs for a moment.

“I said, I’m fine.” If your face doesn’t give off the vibe that you are both irritated and pissed at the same time, then your voice surely does it.

A makeshift puff of laugher escapes his lips as he observes your face, trying to take a glimpse of your eyes, which are avoiding his at all cost. “No, need to be stubborn. After all it’s my dog’s fault, so let me help you get ba-”

“What if I like laying on the ground? Has it crossed you mind?” Interrupting him once again, the dark haired man can’t help but laugh. “What’s funny?”

“Nothing...” He drags out waiting to hear you name, but you don’t give him anything. Finally, you start to feel your fingers and quickly go back on your feet. Patting all the sand away from your clothes you turn to look at the man who is now also back on his feet. “I’m Ace, nice to meet you...” Raising his right brow Ace makes a second attempt to get your name as he reaches with his hand for a handshake, but you just ignore it. Still avoiding his eyes, you murmur your name, and he repeats it as he makes sure to remember it. “I’m really sorry ‘bout Max.”

Lowering your eyes down to the ground you are met with an adorable golden retriever, who happily wiggles its tail, barking at you in a way like he greets you. “It’s fine.” You reply and finally trace your eyes to take a better look at the man in front of you. Quite tall and muscular, obviously older than you, but not a lot, at best late thirties you would guess, with a raven-black wavy hair reaching his shoulders and freckles spread across his cheeks. Dressed in black pants and just a simple white shirt, with red bead neckless around his neck. If you aren’t as pissed as you are right now, you might have been nicer to the man, but you are not – you are more than pissed at this point, you are aggravated. He has apologies already why is he still here.

“So, I guess you are the new owner of this house.” Ace says, crossing his arms over his chest and observing you, while waiting for your answer. What has gotten you so irritated? It can’t be just his dog. All he gets in response is a nod from you. “That’s nice. What made you movie here? Are you al-”

“Look, no need for a small talk, Ace...? It was Ace, right?” Deep down you know that later you will regret this. After all it is obvious that the man is just being polite and means no harm towards you, but he just happened to appear in the worst possible moment – first the moving company, then you having to carry everything by yourself and then you being swept to the ground by his dog, which you aren’t as mad about as you body betraying you when you have tried to stand up. “Why I moved here or whatever is up to me, now if you don’t mind, I would love to be left alone, and please if you can’t control your dog, put it on a leash or something.” You don’t even wait for a response when you turn around and crouch to pick up the things you have dropped.

“Hey, be as rude as you want to me, but careful with the comments ‘bout the dog.” Be rude, act bratty and arrogant as much as you want towards him, but Ace would never tolerate someone acting or speaking bad about his dog.

“Pff, whatever.” Murmuring under your breath once again you pay the man no attention. Grabbing the box steady in your hands you turn around and see him still standing there. “I think I made it clear that I want to be left alone, didn’t I?”

“Just a question, are you planning to get all of this in the house all by yourself?” His question isn’t mocking, but there is a hit of a mockery in his voice.

Swallowing hard and biting on the inside of your cheek you just nod. “Yes, why?”

“Look, princess.” He starts with a chuckle. “If you need help, I can help you.”

“Don’t pet name me.” Narrowing your eyes at him you are about to cuss him off when you notice something in the background, something quite familiar. “You know whose car is that?” Pointing at the silver truck car behind him, parked on your neighbour’s driveway, you fix your attention on it. You know this car; this is the same car of the same crazy person you have encounter on the crossway a month ago. This day can’t get worse that this – but apparently your neighbour turns out to be the crazy driver.

Raising his brow a bit and looking at you carefully, Ace throw a glance behind him at the car. “I do know. Why?”

“I’m sure this is the car of this crazy road rage maniac I encounter a month ago.” Hearing this his eyes widen a bit as realisation hits him. Taking a glance on the side he sees your car and recognises it immediately.  

“Well, if some people hadn’t missed four green lights in a row, that so called maniac wouldn’t have reacted the way he did.” Straighten his back and rolling his shoulders blades Ace looks at you, and now he is equally as pissed as you are. He can’t believe how can someone has such an attitude, when they have been the one who is in the wrong.

“Excuse me?” It doesn’t take you long to connect the dots that the ‘road maniac’ is him and that he also happens to be your neighbour. “First of all, it was my first time ever stepping foot in this town.” Walking closer to him you point your finger in his face. “Second, there could have been kids or people in general crossing the streets, what if you have hit someone?”

“Easy with the finger pointing.” He warns you as he takes a step closer to you, having have enough with your attitude. “Cut the bullshit. You’re the one who was at fault.”

“I did try to apologies, asshole.” You spat right back at him.

Deciding that there is no point in arguing with such a stubborn, big attitude, egocentric woman, Ace just turns around and calls after his dog to follow him.

“Oh, yes. Walkaway, you crazy maniac.” You yell after him with a big cocky smile spread across your face.

As he is turning back to look at you and close your big mouth shit, Ace feels a drop of rain falling on his cheek. Lifting his head up at the sky he feels more raindrops falling on his skin and a big cocky smile, similar to yours just a seconds ago, spread across his own face.

“Good luck, getting all this inside, princess.”  He clicks with his tongue as he sees the panic rushing all over your face as you feel the rain on your own skin. “Come on, Max. Let’s go, boy.” Whistling to his dog and patting the side of his left thigh, the dog happily follows his owner. “Good boy.”

Meanwhile you are not sure what to do next – you haven’t bothered to cover your furniture with anything last night so everything will get wet, and on top of it you don’t have anything to cover them with. Without wasting anymore time, you start running back and forth, trying to get everything inside as fast as possible, but there is no point. It’s pouring rain outside at this point, your sofa, armchair, all the textile furniture you have are wet and no matter what you try, you can’t get them inside by yourself, yet this doesn’t stop you from trying.

Looking at you from his kitchen, Ace sighs deeply with annoyance. Seeing how you are running back and forth, struggling to lift most of the boxes he feels a bit of a pity for you, but not so much to come help you, not like you deserve it. It is still shocking to him, how a beautiful young woman like you could have such an attitude toward a person who in fact tries to be polite with her and just introduce themselves. No matter how attractive you are, you are too young for him anyway, and he will never try to hit on a girl who is obviously still in her twenties, but due to the fact that you are going to be neighbours now, you can at least try to be nice to each other, but no – you happened to be a bitch.

A loud bark takes Ace out of his trance and makes him look away from the window. “Yea, I know boy. Some women are crazy.” Crouching next to his dog, Ace pets Max’s head as he happily barks and wiggle his tail. “Let’s make something to eat.”

You have given up. All you have managed to get inside are the boxes and some chairs, everything else you have left outside. Sitting in the middle of the kitchen, you have made yourself a warm cup of tea to calm yourself down.

Today is probably one of the worst days you have had in a long time. This hasn’t supposed to start like this. After you have given up on the furniture outside, you have called another moving company who has agreed to help you and they will come tomorrow morning, so this is one less problem to worry about.

But the thing you are feeling the worst about is your encounter with your neighbour. You have acted like a bitch towards him, and he didn’t deserve it, but you couldn’t help it. Since you have found out that you might be in first stage of Parkinson’s, something switched in you. You used to smile a lot, be nice, patient, kind to people. But not nowadays. After everything has gone down in your life, it feels like you have turned into something you don’t recognise anymore. You barely smile, having people around you irritates you to a point that you want to be isolated and far away from everyone, and that is why you have moved here in a first place. That is why you want to start new life as an escape from everyone and everything.

Of course, with your luck, everything from day one goes downhill, and you don’t know how to fix things. You don’t know if you actually want to fix them, maybe it is for better that things have turned out this way. You don’t want nor need friends, neighbours or whatever – you are all fine by yourself.

You are all fine by yourself, until it’s nighttime and there is no one to whom you can share your pain. No one to share how much you are afraid of the future and what it holds for you. No one to tell that even looking at the mirror you can’t recognise the face looking right back at you. That everything feels like you are locked in some lucid dream, no – nightmare, from which you can not escape.

It doesn’t matter how far away we go, where we go, or who we go with; at the end of the day no matter what you take yourself everywhere you go, yet recently you are not you. And this pains you, it pains you so deeply that almost every night you spend curled up in your bed, with tears falling down like waterfalls, yet no matter what you try nothing ease the pain. You want to scream, shout even, that this isn’t fair. Why you must endure this pain, why life has to take everything you love away from you? What have you done to deserve this?

Tonight, is no different than any other – you find yourself curled up in your new bed, which thankfully has been delivered here a week ago, so at least you have where to sleep. You have imagined tonight so much different, but as everything in this life nothing goes as planned for you. Curled up and clinging to the bed sheets with your fists wrap around them, your cries are silent, yet the need to scream is at the top of your lungs.

END NOTE: Again, I’m so sorry that it took so long to post chapter one. The thing is that I realised how much I suck with describing atmosphere and I really try to focus on this now as it’s important for the setting of the story. Another thing is that some of the things in the story include a lot of research + I have to really dig into Ace’s characters (more than usual) because making him in his 40s is a challenge as he can not act as he did when he was 20. And to make things also more complicated to me I made the story being set in the early 2000s so I must do research on how some things were back then as I was a baby back then haha. Anyway I hope that you enjoyed the first chapter and that you are willing to follow this story with the same interest as some of you follow THE NBHD. Your feedback is always appreciate by me ♡. Feel free to like, comment, reblog or message me about it. THANK YOU ♡♡♡

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writing, format & dividers © cinnamoonblue artwork @mxhxkxcx ©cinnamoonblue, do not copy or plagiarise my work.

[rottenpumpkin13]

AGSZC go to therapy(group or solo your choice)

how much chaos occurs? :D

*At group therapy*

Zack, annoyed: I just want to start off by saying, I do not need to be here. I don't even want to be here. The guys were supposed to time me as I beat my personal squatting record, but instead we're here.

Genesis: I don't need to be here either.

Zack: Genesis suffers from insecurities stemming from childhood neglect, leading to his need for perfection and a desire to be equal to Sephiroth, of whom he harbors envy over his achievements.

*Genesis runs out of the room*

Sephiroth: How odd. I had no idea he felt like—

Zack: Sephiroth's formative years were spent searching for his mother, only to learn she had been dead, and his childhood was consumed by being a lab specimen and later a war tool for Shinra.

*Sephiroth runs out of the room*

Angeal: Damn, Zack, take it easy.

Zack: Growing up honoring the values his father taught him before he passed and spending his childhood in hardship made Angeal a people pleaser who doesn't give himself the time of day.

*Angeal runs out of the room*

Cloud: At least I had a normal life until now.

Zack: Cloud—

*Cloud zooms out of the room*

*Zack hands the therapist a stopwatch*

Therapist:

Zack: Time me.

*Zack starts doing squats*

Therapist:

Zack: This has nothing to do with my mental health, by the way.

[acidgreendog]

A Kaz Playlist

Exploring that untouched ground between when Kaz discovers he's been used and left out of BB's plans and when he finally settles as Master Miller, I've been thinking a lot about that anger and betrayal he must have felt to get him to walk away from everything he had been building. The personal anger he felt against BB himself was my main focus for a lot of these songs, as well as the feelings of turning his back on him in retaliation. I'm also enjoying thinking about how that bitterness and anger would spiral into a cycle of abuse that may have got taken out on his students, especially david snake, later down the line. This is basically like the world's edgiest break up playlist.

Genres: industrial metal, nu-metal, hard rock, grunge, alt rock.

Run time: 1hr 41 mins

Thumbnail art (by me)

Tracklist

(to be played in no particular order) and lyrics excerpts to show a little bit of why I picked each song:

The Big Come Down -Nine Inch Nails

"the big come down, isn't that what you wanted? // find a place with the failed and forgotten"

Twenty Four Hours -The Twilight Sad (cover)

"just for one moment, thought I'd found my way // destiny unfolded, watched it slip away"

Last Time -Fuel

"this is the last time now // I'll bleed for you"

Change My Mind -Puddle Of Mud

"how could I ever believe anything you've ever said? // I'm on the bottom of your shoes, a little piece, a piece of shit"

A New Way To Bleed -Evanescence

"but it's my // my heart // my life // that you're calling a lie // I've played this game before // and I can't take anymore"

The Line Begins To Blur -Nine Inch Nails

"there are things that I said I would never do // there are fears that I cannot believe have come true"

Hangnail -Nickleback

"my hopes just fell // and I can't see // the reason why // why there is blood on my sleeve // and all this time, I thought it mine // but it's not, it's yours"

Mudshovel -Staind

"all the promises you made to me you made in vain"

Made Of Stone -Evanescence

"I'll numb the pain 'till I am made to // tear out my heart for the way it makes me feel // I will still remember when you've long forgotten me"

September Rain -Cassyette

"my pain clouding my brain // I pray I will find me again"

Somewhat Damaged -Nine Inch Nails

"how could I ever think, it's funny how // everything you swore would never change is different now"

Somebody Someone -Korn

"I can't stand to let you win // I'm just watching you // and I don't know what to do // feeling like a fool inside"

Point #1 -Chevelle

"rebuke, don't choke on this twisted dream"

Home -Staind

"I can't accept this all // because of you I've had to walk away from everything"

Massive -Linkin Park

"I heard the screaming in my dreaming every night // I awake and I'm still mistaking you for right"

You Walk Away -Filter

"I can't live hate // I just won't hate // I just want a life of my own"

Thoughtless -Korn

"all my hate cannot be found // I will not be drowned // by your thoughtless scheming"

Wish -Nine Inch Nails

"I built it up, now I take it apart // climbed up real high, now fall down real far// no need for me to stay"

Alone I Break -Korn

"Now I see the times they change // leaving doesn't seem so strange // I am hoping I can find // where to leave my hurt behind"

Head Like A Hole -Nine Inch Nails

"head like a hole // black as your soul // I'd rather die than give you control"

And One (Hybrid Theory EP) -Linkin Park

"angers a gift, then I guess I've been blessed"

Prison Sex -Tool

"do unto you now, what has been done to me // do unto you now, what has been done" -not necessarily to be taken at the face value the song communicates, more so about a cycle of abuse among male power dynamics

Blue Monday - Orgy (cover)

"how does it feel, to treat me like you do? // When you've laid your hands upon me // and told me who you are"

Hating -Korn

"been hating all this time, before I crawled inside // been hating all the faces of everything I could find"

Doomed User - Deftones

"they're delusions, don't deny it // don't make this out to be a thing about you // I've been scarred, fucking repulsed by this // my only tale is one I can't stand"

[echantedtoon]

Sweet Sorrows

When the shadowed light turns to a full eclipse that blocks out even the stars, the monster comes out to claim the maiden. The wound Cupid's arrow caused by piercing the dark heart bleeds out for her, so the heart would seek what it's body needed to heal. The waning desire pangs them so.

(Or alternate title: Ried Gets All The Attention Whether She Wants It Or Not. If you're wondering by what's happening in this, essentially three boys being obsessive over you ain't always a good thing.

This is inspired by @wolveria's Cursed Polycule Au, and who was nice enough to give me permission to write something loosely based off it and using Kenneth in this. Please forgive me it's the first and second time writing for these characters so any ooc writing is probably there. The dynamic of the polycule is based off/on the fanart linked down below by @e-g-g-w-i-n . Please check out both content creators and support they're works.

WARNINGS: Some toxic relationship stuff mentioned, death, possible blood mentioned, possession with the mask, implied kidnapping maybe, yandereish tendencies, possibly some innuendos, and Dyo IS his own warning.)

Alarm, alarm.

The breach has begun. 

A prison break is a daring and often perilous act where a prisoner, utilizing stealth, cunning, and sometimes violence, manages to evade security measures and escape from a correctional facility. Typically involving breaching cell walls, scaling fences, or digging tunnels, while evading watchful guards to reach freedom outside the prison perimeter. 

It often requires careful planning, smuggled tools, and coordinated efforts with accomplices, putting both the escapee and those aiding them at significant risk of capture and further legal repercussions. However would it still be considered a prison if it was more akin to hell?

Like the flashes of hellfire red lights flashed upon the freed and bloodthirsty creatures that reigned supreme of the mesh of concrete and steel that once made up their confined cells of torture. The whirring of alarms sounded overhead instead of warning the innocent of humans seemed more of a praised laugh to announce the arrival of the manic chaos that was to befall all. 

Blood. As red as the lights and as copper as the metal was the main decoration for the parade of monsters descending through the halls and disemboweling the humans and in some cases each other. No one cares. Certainly not the beasts that now ran ramped with adrenaline and bloodlust in their minds.

An inhuman screech went off into the night as a stronger forced ripped away arms from torso. Eyes turned and stared into the bloodlust abyss of bloodshot eyes. A mix of shrieks echoed out into the darkened night above. So much blood spilt in that night that it might've even spilt into the moon illuminating red down on everything. 

R E D

That was the war paint splattered proudly across his body and coating his skin like a devil from the very flames that he walked through. Blood. Vengeance. C A R N A G E.

R E D

The color clouded vision beyond reasoning. Inhuman yells of pain and murder carved way by him. One by one. Body by body. Life by life. Flesh torn from bone. Blood cleaved from muscles. Arms from torso. Limb from limb. He was a beast tonight. The thirst for blood was not just a want but a need. For tonight he was not a man. Not a demon. Nor anything else comprehendible by human thought.

F O R  T O N I G H T   H E  W A S  D E A T H  A N D  H E  W A S   B R I N G I N G  H E L L  W I T H  H I M.

The darkness both swallowed him up and closed off the ways both in front and behind him making each end of the pathay difficult to see with the already limited vision he had. Heightened senses were one thing he had been thankful to have retained from years of familiarity to his body and mind. Closing off all senses to be more enlightened to one's world in a different light. Each echo of his footfalls ringing in his mind as the airways of his body forced himself to absorb more oxygen out of the air and each heart beat thudding against his ribcage. Throbbing sensation reaching from his head to his feet with every passing second he was surrounded by the buzzing swarm of danger. Enlightened by the stings of fear. Danger. Dread. Doom. Like many wasps penetrating his most basic human emotions and swelling them up to the point of combusting dangerously all over the peeping, teasing darkness. The soft silk touch of his host's clothes met his hand. It was hard to move...Hard to will it to move running along the soft fabric to something more smooth and hard. Both basic instinct wasps forcing him to do something so familiar to combat the combustible feelings. To grab at which to protect him and cut it away like a sickeningly sweet cake of misery and despair. Instincts wailing to protect himself from dangers he had yet to see. Had yet to reveal themselves to him. Hopefully to be chased away by the sounds of the bullets of the gun and held out into the darkness to cut it's tainting self down a notch. That his willpower will always prevail over it. Each burning room slowly passing a tainting gateway. Each with a promise of safety behind it and perhaps even it had occupants inside using it. taking up it's offering of safety from the darkness now dead to the world highly unaware of the masked host just roaming outside arm outstretched and staring down the one that dared teased him the most with it's fake promise of protection. 

"Ried?" The sounds of the next door smashing open by beyond human strength echoed out. "C'mon, Doc. Now's a bad time for hide and seek.~"

And that promise he would soon come to learn was broken and not even promise to one individual soon enough. As sweat formed on his host's skin in an attempt to cool it from the harsh tainting from the moment he was face to face with the door that broke it's sacred promise. At first glance to one in the dark it was as taunting as all the others he had just passed, but if one took time to see it's true mockery and failure hidden by the teasing darkness they would've seen it. The remnants of a beast. Looking as though it had clawed and kicked it's way at the door's sacred locks to be allowed entry inside the room beyond it. In it's wake leaving the door in misery and ruins. A slight opening between itself and the wall where one could look into the room beyond it and see nothing but more darkness laughing back at you.

It begged for him to open it further, to peek further into the darkness beyond the door that should have protected the occupant inside. The surprising untouched room was still, quite, far too quite for his liking. The broken splintered door only left so little to memory, and with cautious pushed aside he shoved the door open to reveal the horror to his eyes. His eyes widened. There where obvious signs of ransacking, evident by the turned over coffee table and the furniture pieces that lay toppled on their side as though someone had carelessly kicked it over in its rampage. The host body treaded carefully inside the ruined room, his shoe crunching on the remains of a picture frame that had been knocked over, its broken shiny cover a perfect match of the doorway half hanging from its hinges - the cover to what lay beyond broken to bits

What once was undoubtedly a very nice-to-stay-in staff break room inviting for visitors was now reduced to what might've been a break in sight following the discovery of a murder. Which made the situation even more worse. A small gasp noise left his host's throat as his foot caught onto something. And the something that dared to trip him up happened to be a piece of fabric. MANY pieces of fabric in the form of clothing strew about in the darkness of the floor he hadn't seen at first among the shattered frame glass. Heart throbbing sensation still hammering his entire body as he turned and twisted his body around the room.

CCCRRREEEAAA-

In just one second his body reacted on it's own. Twisting his body and holding his arm out to defend against the intruder...Only to let his nerves relax when discovering it was just the poor broken door slowly closing back to it's original poor position he had found it in. Internally cursing to himself at the overreaction it had caused him. At least...That was until he saw what was on the other side of the door he had missed upon initial entry. The gleam of a familiar metallic silver caught his eyes in the limited darkness he was able to make out and the shock at seeing it at first melted his sight and his mind raced. The door being the only thing to answer his shocked mind as it finally creaked back into place.

The host approached slowly, one hand still gripped at his gum, fingers strumming against the metal handle as if his nerves where itching to use it. Yet he remained stoic despite the clouds that where casting gathering to add to the storm inside his head. Upon closer inspection the scalpel  in the door was too purposeful for this to be an improvised job, this job - this attack, this entire get away had been just a waste of his time so far. His eyes narrowed, other hand ripping the surgical knife free from the grip that held it in place against the doorframe. The shining metal reflected the red staining his body and the frustrated frown of the porcelain face-

A inhuman scream tore through the area drowning out the other terrible screams and blaring alarm. An already broken door kicked off it's hinges as the demon walked back into the night seeking answers.

"This isn't the right way to go about this. You should stop now." 

"You are either on my side, by my side, or in my fucking way." The hands puppeteered gripped the gun tighter. "Choose wisely." 

Not an answer was given back from the host mind 

"That's what I thought. Now be a good boy for me.~ Tell me exactly where you think little miss immunity would hide during a situation like this.~" 

The blaring alarms hid well the sounds of his footsteps and the chaos of murder around him covered the intention of the desire and want which was the driving force of the shared minds that combined with one another to become one. 

The screams rang into the air as his pathway was made, him walking through its wake of cadavers long since dead.

Terror. Fear. Danger. Get away. Get away! All the pathetic ones scream. Like a car accident, terrible yet one couldn't look away from the incoming storm of tragedy. He was so used to such actions as he came with the reputation. The woman who continued to shriek in his way meant nothing to him. She was merely just an obstacle. An annoying hindrance to what he wanted-..No.

What he N E E D E D.

And he always dealt away with obstacles. The old body was easily chuckled to the side, he not caring about where it landed or how the other ended up. Screaming. A true testimony to his being. Power. Force behind it and he knew that as screams filled out his eardrums and killed him into the comfortable lullaby of chaos incarnate. Arms rising and head tilted back in display for the passionate dance of bodies scattering blurred to his vision footfalls thundering like a rain dance of nature. A true place a demon would find peace. Eyelids fluttered shut as the sounds blurred out around him until he heard nothing. Saw nothing. Felt nothing. But-

P E A C E

Until the panging desire returned from the other side deep down replacing the peace with a frustrated annoyance the farther into the hell hole he went. The reluctant annoyance only being halted by the passage of a familiar voice or two coming from a room. Little Miss Immunity's little office. How cute.~

"Rest a little longer. Your leg wound is deep but nothing serious."

"You could've gotten away you know. I'm dead weight with my limited movement."

"You know that I wouldn't do such a thing. I love you too much for that."

"Love makes you do stupid thing then."

"On the contrary. I only ever thought there were two kinds of loves. The kind you'd kill for and the kind you'd die for but you, Reid... You're the kind of love I'd live for."

The chaos had not left the couple unscathed. Blood pooling to a stop from her body thanks to a series of highly tightened bandages wrapped around her upper thigh courtesy of the concerned doctor knelt beside her. Hands caressing her pale face and wiping at the cold sweat poured from above her brows, fingertips leaving red smears behind from the hands that prepped the wounds. No doubt she had suffered blood loss. Both a curse to her..

And a blessing to him.

"Nice speech, Doc.~" Immediately the temperature in the room dipped. The man in the black robes freezing and the f/c of the woman dipping into the size of pins as the host body stepped within eyesight finally. A bubble of happiness panging throughout his being. "Unfortunately words aren't much good at healing wounds. Wouldn't you say?~"

"Oh my God..." Her bottom lip twitched as horrific realization of what stood before her settled in. "Ke- Kenneth?"

"AAAHNT! Wrong. But you are half right, he's still here and conscious of everything.~" A hand reached out to tap the side of the porcelain mask smiling wickedly. "He's a rather good boy.~ Doesn't complain, does as he's told, and- OH! He loves you, Darling.~ We have more things in common than one thinks." 

Her quivering, lips looked so cute on her horrified face. But he was more giddy when a face of white and narrowed silver eyes of hatred turned to greet him in disdain. "Dyo."

"Hiii, Doc." The gun was shifted to rest against his shoulder as his other hands wagged fingers at him. Happy black ooze seeping from the mouth of his face and dripping onto his body. "Did you miss me?~ I certainly missed you.~"

"Why is it that I can never seem to wash my hands of you?"

"Magnetism, Honey. I can't help it if I'm irresistible.~ And here I thought you liked my charming personality.~"

"Spare me your worthless babblings." His form shifted over. Protectively blocking the girl all three of the men in that room wanted from sight. Doesn't change the fact she was still there.~ "What do you want? Shouldn't you be fleeing like the rat you are akin too?"

"Aw.~ Flattery will get you everywhere with me if you just bothered to try.~ But since we're running on limited time here, I'll spare the chit chat and get straight to the point." The rifle in his hands clicked as it resumed it's place back sideways held in front of his chest. "I think we all have a common interest here."

"Escaping you mean?"

"Actually I was talking about little Miss Immunity over there but that too! Actually I'm here to collect the both of you to my little toy box.~"

As expected, a roaring wave of rage ignited in his body as shocked rocked the bird like face and his body tensed. "Do you mean to tell me that you're here with the intention of collecting her like a doll?!"

"Actually I think the normal person calls it a harem. I've been around enough to see the appeal of having one." The gun was nudged to point out the woman looking paler by the second staring at the both of them. "But we can play house later once Doll face is situated somewhere else don't you agree?" His head tilted as he hummed. "You'd have to carry her with that leg wound and you'd be needing help with getting out.~ I'd say that you'll be needing a partner, Doc."

"I'd sooner shatter you into a million pieces than accept your twisted hand of help!"

"It's not like you have a choice. There's three of us here that want the same thing...Well technically I want you too, but we all agree with wanting to keep her alive and within our grasp. I'm afraid you're both a little bit out of luck here. So now why don't you pick up the weight, and we can all be on our merry way?"

"You're a villain. A sick twisted villain and I should've tied you to a rock and threw you into the ocean instead of leaving you in that crypt!" 

There was silence other than the alarm still shrieking out and the feint sounds of chaos and screams still coming from the halls around them all. The host's body tending under the scalding of words thrown to his face. Before the frame of the gun creaked under his crushing grasp and a bear growl escaped his disembodied throat.

"Hm. Well it's a good thing for you both I am the villain instead of a saint."

"And just what might be the good of that?!" 

"A hero would sacrifice you to save the world, but a villain would sacrifice the world to save you. And it's lucky for everyone involved that I like playing the part of the bad guy.~" 

[soapsilly]

Redemption - Roronoa Zoro Imagine

Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader

Spoilers for One Piece (?)

A/N: This is Part 2 for Betrayal, another Zoro imagine I wrote, so if you haven't read that I'd recommend you do that first.

Summary: After (Y/N) confessed to the Straw Hat Pirates that during their two year separation, she betrayed her boyfriend Zoro and had a child back on the island she was stranded on, she had to leave the group. But once her new home was under attack she had no other choice but to once again hope for the crew's help. Will they forgive her?

Part 3

Requests are closed

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Fire... smoke... screams...

She could see the clouds of smoke from miles away. Once she set foot on the island the first things that greeted her weren't the familiar smell of the autumn leaves or the sound of the market place but rather the smell of the burnt down huts and the pleas of the townspeople. Ever since Whitebeard's death two years ago pirates from all over the world set sail in search of the One Piece. It was exactly like after Gol D. Roger's execution all over again. But her little island? This wasn't where the One Piece was hidden. What these pirates wanted was merely to destroy, to pillage and to artificially drive up their bounty...

"We would never do that", the young woman thought to herself, "all our bounties were racked up for far better reasons. Luffy would never allow this" (Y/N) was well aware, that she herself was part of a notorious pirate crew - or rather she had been part of one until recently...

The realization hurt but she didn't have time to keep thinking about her misery. All that mattered right now was the little boy for whom she had given up everything. As fast as her feet would carry her she ran towards the edge of the forrest where the little cabin that she called her home stood.

She breathed a sigh of relief once she arrived and saw that the destruction of the village had not yet reached that part of the island. But she didn't plan to just sit by and wait for that to happen. The people on the island she called her home weren't fighters. If they were lucky there were a few handymen that knew how to handle tools and heavy machinery but that was about it. She knew that she could never take on those pirates on her own - even if she improved her strenght greatly in the span of those last two years. But she knew who could...

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"Are you sure you're okay?", she whispered, not wanting to get caught by the other Straw Hats.

"Pffft.. Never felt better", the swordsman dismissed her worries with a movement of his hand and continued undressing the woman that was lying underneath him. Calloused hands roaming her body, trying to take in as much of her as he could.

"But - But you should rest...", it became increasingly harder to string together coherrent sentences with the way Zoro was kissing down her chest.

"If you insist", with a swift movement he flipped them around and in an instant the witch was now on top her green-haired boyfriend, straddling him firmly.

She started laughing, "You know, that's not what I meant"

Not many people knew Zoro the way (Y/N) knew him. The other Straw Hats would probably describe him as a 'matter of fact' - guy. His playful side wasn't something he kept hidden - not at all. It's just that the stupid jokes were only funny when they left her lips.

"Hey, Zoro. Dinner's ready", Sanji's words pulled the swordsman out of his thoughts. Every since (Y/N)'s confession nobody on the ship acted normal around him anymore - well nobody except Luffy and Robin. Luffy was never the most delicate, which Zoro was grateful for and Robin probably knew that he just wanted to move on. Nami however didn't leave him alone, offered to speak, to be a shoulder to cry on. He appreciated her good intentions but he just wanted to repress the feelings, exercise and drink his pain away. But the thing that annoyed him the most was that shitty cook being so nauseatingly nice to him. Nami told Sanji that she would raise him hell if he even dared to think to start a fight with Zoro. But what she had achieved, was that the only little thing that the swordsman had left of his (Y/N) was now gone too. He remembered how amusing she found the fights he and curly-brows had - so much so that Zoro tried to initiate fights with the cook. But Sanji never took the bait no matter how hard he had to pull himself together. If Nami-swan wanted something from him, he would not disappoint.

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There she was, it was barely a week and a half since (Y/N) left the Thousand Sunny back on Sabaody but yet it felt like a lifetime. The witch took a few deep breaths before slowly making her way over to the ship. She was grateful that Robin told her that the crew would have to make a stop for supplies an island over before heading to Fish-Man Island. On her way over there, she had hoped that she didn't miss them, that they'd still be there and all the hoping seemed to have payed off. But the hardest challenge - convincing her former friends to help her after everything she put them trough - still lay ahead of her.

Much to her dismay the whole group was not only on the ship when she arrived, they were also in the middle of dinner.

"(Y/N), you came back!", Luffy's voice broke the silence. The girl realized that he genuinely sounded happy to see her. She wasn't quite sure if she felt happy that there was at least one person left on this ship that didn't hate her or sad because she had to tell him yet again, that she still wasn't coming back.

But before she (Y/N) could even attempt to say anything, Nami spoke up, "No, Luffy. She's not. What are you doing here?"

Her voice was cold - so much in fact, that (Y/N) needed two attempts to explain the reason for why she was there. Once she finally ended her plea for help there were a solid few seconds where nobody said a word. (Y/N) had mostly spoken to Luffy as the captain of the ship but she knew that it was really the navigator that she would have to convince to help her. She kept her eyes firmly trained on the Straw Hat anticipating his decision. She, of course, noticed Zoro's presence in the room - how could she not? - but right now all that mattered was that the crew agreed to help.

"Please, I wouldn't ask if I had any other choice...", (Y/N) added quietly after a few more seconds of silence.

"Of course, I'm coming to save you, (Y/N)-chan~", Sanji was the first one to speak up in his sing song voice with hearts in his eyes. For him it wasn't even a question at all. All he saw was a damsel in distress and he'd be the knight in shining armour to come and save the day. He could already picture himself as the hero of the battle and all the ladies clinging on to him to show their gratitude. It was Usopp that had to break the flirtatious cook out of his ramble with a slap on the back of his head.

"What are we even debating about? Of course, we're helping, guys! She's one of us", Chopper agreed. The ship's doctor was always a loyal soul. Chopper and (Y/N) both were outsiders before they met the Straw Hats so she knew how important his nakama were to him.

"No, Chopper. That's exactly the case! She's not. Not anymore", Nami objected, "she should've thought about that before betraying the whole crew. We can't always drop everything just because a former acquaintance happens to have a problem"

Nami liked to say that she was only upset for Zoro - and she really was. She knew that the mosshead was utterly in love with the other woman. She could tell from the way he would loosen up around her, she could tell by the way he would look after her to make sure nothing and nobody would ever upset or hurt her, she could tell by the way he was slightly - only slightly - less annoying when he was around her but the truth was also that Nami was hurt for herself too. (Y/N) was her friend, the first girl that joined the group before Robin finally made them a trio. They had talked about their plans and then (Y/N) just chose the domestic life over everything they had dreamed of?

"And what will you do the next time you'll be in trouble? We won't always be around to save the day", the red-head now spoke directly to (Y/N).

"I promise, I won't ever bother you again, but you haven't seen what I've seen. I'm not asking for myself..."

Of course, she wasn't asking for selfish reasons. Zoro knew that. (Y/N) always chastised him for being so stubborn. But the swordsman knew that she was honestly none the better. If he ever told her that, she'd never admit it but it was the truth. And so he also knew that (Y/N) was far to proud to come and ask them for help so soon after leaving the crew - well, except if she had no other choice. But it didn't really matter anyways, if she was in danger or even just in any type of discomfort, he'd always come and save her.

Zoro had heard enough, "We're helping"

It was the first time that (Y/N) looked at him since she entered the ship. She looked like a scared deer with how wide her eyes were. It was clear to him that she didn't expect him to stand up for her at all. Did she really think that lowly of him? Why did that thought sting? If Nami was anything to go by, he should hate her and helping her should be the last thing on his mind but he just couldn't help his feelings. This time it was Zoro that couldn't stand the tension, so he tore his eyes away from his ex-lover.

"Zoro, are you-", Nami seemed unsure.

"Either we all go or I'll go alone, I'm done talking about this", and with those words the swordsman stood up from the table and left the room. When he passed (Y/N) on the way out, he had to side-step as to not bump into her but just that act alone was the closest he's been to her in a long time.

"Guess, it's settled then", Luffy laughed, "(Y/N) lead the way!"

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Zoro and (Y/N) were lying on the deck of the Sunny at the moment talking about anything and eveything. Usually the mosshead would have a afternoon nap but instead (Y/N) and him decided spend some time together soaking up the last sunrays of the day.

"Is there anything else you want out of life?", (Y/N) asked her boyfriend, who had his head comfortable rested on her lap.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean... other than becoming the world's greatest swordsman?"

"No, why would I?"

"Well, you made that promise to a friend when you were a child. You're a man now. Isn't there anyhting else that you could wish for? In addition to being the best? I mean what happens once you reach your goal?"

Zoro was quiet for a moment, it was clear to (Y/N) that her lover had truly never ever considered there possibly being more.

"Well, what about you then?", he positioned himself so that he was now looking up at her.

"I guess, I'd like to be married someday", she answered nonchalantly.

"Why?", Zoro's voice dripped with confusion but there was also somehting else... judgement maybe?

"I don't know, I think I just like the thought of having that special bond with a person, you know? Belonging together, having each other's back...", she trailed off towards the end. She could feel her cheeks heat up. Talking about feelings was so much easier when drunk...

"Oi! Everything okay with you?", Zoro sounded amused, "you sound exactly like curly-brows"

"Why? Because I want to belong somewhere?", she was irritated by his reaction.

"Don't be so dramatic", the swordsman rolled his eyes, "you belong to the crew like all of us"

She wiggled her way out from underneath him not wanting him on her anymore.

"Do you really not understand how that's different? I just don't want to be just someone's girlfriend for the rest of my life", she was starting to get frustrated now.

"Just someone's girlfriend? And being someone's wife is better? What kind of goal is that?", (Y/N) could sense that Zoro was not taking her seriously at the moment, which made her even more furious. Unfortunately the witch was an angry-crier, so wasn't long before the tears started to fill her eyes. When he saw her reaction, he added, "Damn, you are so sensitive"

"And you are always so goddamn insensitive! Talking to you is like talking to a brick wall!", (Y/N) knew she shouldn't yell but the way he was talking down to her made her feel so helpless.

"I don´t want to talk to you anyways when you're being so difficult. I should've just taken a nap", he was annoyed by her behavior.

"Fine!", with that she stood up and walked away from her boyfriend but as she was walking inside the Sunny she turned around telling him, "and for your information, the are some things that Sanji actually gets very right, you know..."

She knew that indirectly comparing him to the cook would rub him the wrong way but she really couldn't resist.

"Oi, are you actually trying to start a fight or what?!", Zoro yelled after her, raising his voice for the first time the entire conversation.

Zoro mindlessly sat by the railing sharpening his katanas. Would things be different today had he acted a little more sensitive during their fight? Back then he didn't pay it anymore mind. In fact, he didn't think (Y/N) would've either. They had had far bigger fights - or so he thought - but guess it was more important to her than he anticipated. Maybe he wasn't enough for her... Was she really that unhappy?

"Hey...", Zoro was pulled from his thoughts by (Y/N) herself. It was the first time that she directly spoke to him since her confession on Sabaody, "I just wanted to thank you for speaking up back then. You really saved us"

Us... Zoro felt a sting in his chest. Of course, her new man and their son. Helping her wasn't even a question for him but the thought that she was in that situation to begin with made him angry. What kind of man doesn't protect his family?

"Don't mention it", he grunted, still not looking up from his blades.

"No, I mean it. If it wasn't for you I don't know what I'd do", Zoro couldn't help but notice that the way she was talking to him wasn't as familiar anymore almost like they were strangers. First the crew and now (Y/N) too. All this tiptoeing around made him sick - he wasn't used to being pitied and he didn't like it. One bit. He would almost have preferred it if she had just sad down with him and talked... normally?

As if she had read his mind, she asked him if she could sit with him for a moment. She took the shrug she got in returned as a 'yes' and sat down opposite from him.

"Zoro... I - I really never meant to hurt you", she continued. He wasn't sure if he wanted to have this conversation now but the alternative was her leaving again, so...

"It's my own fault. I should've known better", he answered.

"What? Why would you say that?", the woman opposite of him truly sounded upset with his statement. She was trying to catch his eye but he adjusted himself so that he was now facing the water.

"I wouldn't give you what you wanted. I was too occupied with my goal of becoming the strongest. All the training, the exercising...", he trailed off towards the end. "Logical consequences", he tried to sound unbothered.

The witch furrowed her brows, "No... No, no. Where is that coming from?"

"You told me you wanted to get married someday and I didn't take you seriously"

She remembered the fight but hadn't thought about for ages - especially because - in her mind - it wasn't so big of a deal. But then again, the swordsman also never heard what happened after the fight.

When Sanji entered the dining area the first thing he noticed was a sniffling (Y/N). With the speed of lightning he was kneeling in front of her, tracing soothing cirlces on one of her hands.

"(Y/N)-chan! What happened? Who hurt you?", the cook jumped up from his position on the floor.

"It's nothing, Sanji. Just a little fight", she wiped her tears away and tried to smile up at him.

"Was it that stupid Marimo? I'm going to break his face for making you cry", he was already halfway out of the room before the witch could even react.

"Sanji, no, please don't", she pleaded. Usually she'd be the last person to stop either one of them from starting a fight with the other but this time was different.

When the blond heard how desperate she sounded he stopped in his tracks, instead he turned around and started to prepare some tea for himself and the girl.

Once the tea was served, he sat down with her, so they could talk.

"It's silly...", she tried to dismiss the problem but Sanji wouldn't have it.

"How silly can it be if it makes you cry?", at the mention of her tears she swore there were distinct flames in his irises.

"It's just... Zoro and I were talking about our goals in life and when I told him I'd like to get married someday, he didn't seem to like the idea"

"How could anybody say 'no' to a proposal from you? I would marry you in an instant ~", where the witch had seen flames a moment ago, there were now hearts in his irises.

"Oh yeah? Sanji, no offense but you'd marry any woman that's not on the tree by three", she couldn't help but laugh, "But in fact, I wasn't proposing to him. We were fighting because he's just so... insensitive? You know, sometimes it's like only his thoughts and feelings are what make sense to him and so other thoughts and feelings are irrational and therefore not valid..."

"Stupid.. selfish.. douchebag.. mosshead..", Sanji was talking more to himself than to the girl sitting opposite of him, "why are you even putting up with him? You could easily find a better man that would cherish you and worship the ground you walk on"

The witch was sure the cook was talking about himself but let it slide for the moment.

"I love him", she shrugged, "what you don't understand is, that I'd rather have a thousand fights and never ever get married than to marry somebody else"

In that moment, the cook genuinely could feel how serious the girl was.

" - but don't tell him that. Otherwise, I'll never get him to tie the knot", she quickly added.

"I wouldn't dream of it", the blond confirmed.

"So, and now let's make dinner, yes? I'm starting to get hungry", (Y/N) was nudged Sanji in the side, a bright smile lighting up her face.

To further cheer her up, the cook promised to prepare the witch's favourite meal for dinner and (Y/N) was happy to help and spend some more time with her friend.

(Y/N) was in the midst of stirring one of the many pots, that were cooking on the stove - with Luffy as their captain a single dish would never be enough - when she heard Zoro's voice from outside the kitchen.

"Oi! (Y/N) come quick! There's something I want to show you"

The girl turned to the cook, who by the look of it was busy with adjusting the taste with seasoning so every dish was nothing short of perfect.

"Is it okay if I leave you to it now?", she smiled.

"Are you sure? The stupid marimo didn't even apologize"

"Positive", she shrugged, "I'm not angy anymore and I'm sure he isn't either. Why waste time being pissed at each other when you could also just spend the time that you have together being happy?"

And with that she skipped towards the door leading to the deck where her stubborn, stupid marimo headed boyfriend was already waiting for her. But just before she could leave the kitchen she made an abrupt stop, returned to where she left the cook standing and gave him a kiss on the cheek, which almost made the receiver levitate.

"Thank you, Sanji"

"Zoro, no... There's nothing you could've said or done differently that would've changed anything. I'm... so sorry", she hoped that this would convince him that it really wasn't a 'him-issue' and that he shouldn't give up on love all together, but he remained silence. When she realized that he wouldn't answer her she made a move to get up but just before she could leave Zoro spoke up.

"I don't hate you, you know?", it was the first time during their conversation that he had looked at her - really looked her in the face. She could see that he still loved her. He has always been bad at articulating his emotions but that was okay for her because she could always tell how he felt about her. He showed her. Two years of seperations didn't change that.

She didn't expect him to say anything now - least off all that. Of course, she felt glad to hear it but still she couldn't help but to feel guilty... like she didn't deserve forgiveness for all the pain she caused.

"I wouldn't blame you", she sat back down.

"I could never. Three days are one thing. Two years a whole nother", he shrugged, "Besides, Nami hates you enough for the both of us"

The witch sat there shocked but once she saw Zoro's smirk, she let out a relieved laugh.

"I think Nami hates me enough for the whole crew", she giggled.

The two of them started teasing each ofther and for a moment it felt like before. Before Sabaody, before (Y/N)'s confession, before their separation.

"By the way, I like your dress", the woman told Zoro with a deadpan look. It took a few moments for her words to register in his mind before he started yelling.

"Dress?! Are you blind, woman??"

When she saw how frustrated he was with her she couldn't hold back her giggles.

Their laughs could be heard all over the Sunny, much to the bewilderment of a certain navigator.

"Look at that! How could he be laughing with her like that after everything she put him through?", she turned to Robin.

"They love each other. Feelings don't change from one day to another"

"Well, for her they apparently did...", Nami retorted.

The older woman sent the red-head a knowing smile but chose to stay silent.

************************************************************************

The battle was in full effect and (Y/N) was in awe of how strong everybody has become over these last two years. Even the self-proclaimed coward trio of Usopp, Nami and Chopper did a lot of damage to the enemy crew. A lot of parts of town have been destroyed during the fight but the witch knew that this was the lesser of two evils and the townspeople would work together once everything was over to build it up again.

"They're like vermin!", Nami shouted. She was right. The pirates weren't strong - at least not compared to the Straw Hats - but they were many and they were everywhere.

"Doesn't matter. We're stronger", Ruffy laughed.

During the fight (Y/N) felt like she never left the crew, working together like a well maintained machine. For a moment she forgot about the struggles and that all of this would be only temporary - that they would leave once the threat was over - but then a loud explosion pulled her back to reality. A cloud of black and grey smoke rose up from just outside of town where the forrest began.

"My house!", the young witch shouted, "I need to go- I need- I-"

The others could see the genuine fear in her eyes as she was running towards where the flames were blazing up from afar.

"I'm coming with you", Zoro started to follow her.

The girl stopped in her tracks, "Wait, no you can't come"

"Why? Don't be ridiculous. You'll need help"

"Yes, but not from you", she her voice sounded urgent, "Sanji? Can't you come? Or Robin?"

"What the hell is wrong with you? You're wasting time!", the swordsman was getting angry. Why would she rather want the waiter's help before his? He could keep her safer that any body else on the crew but of course she had to be stubborn again.

"Both of you are wasting time. I'm coming", Robin interjected. Zoro tried to object but before he could both of the women already took off.

"What are you hiding, (Y/N)?", the older of the two asked.

"You'll see soon enough"

************************************************************************

Once the fight was over the forrest floor around the hut was littered with pirates. Neither (Y/N) nor Robin believed in taking prisoners. Fortunately, (Y/N)'s little house and garden were unscathed.

"How?", Robin was puzzled.

The younger woman sent her a bright smile, "That's Mim's doing"

"Mim?"

And so (Y/N) told her about her mentor. Mim was an older woman - an old hag to be specific - that took care of (Y/N) when she landed on her island two years ago. She was strict and a little grim but also extremely warm-hearted and as chance would have it, she was known as the island's sorceress. At first (Y/N) believed that it was only hearsay, like it had been in her home village, but she quickly realized that the old lady was an actual witch and better yet - she would teach her.

"I see. So, your mentor protected your home with a spell", Robin concluded as the both of them walked over to the little hut.

As they walked up to the door, an old woman and a little child came up to them. When Robin saw the little boy with the green hair and the outstreched arms, she quickly realized why (Y/N) was so against Zoro accompanying her.

"You need to tell him, (Y/N)"

"I can't, Robin. It wouldn't change a thing"

"You don't know that", she insisted.

But before (Y/N) could give an answer, they heard the voice a certain green-haired swordsman.

"What wouldn't change a thing?"

(Y/N) stiffened up. When Zoro saw the little boy in her arms his eyes immediately grew wide. The whole crew waited in anticipation.

It was the toddler that broke the silence with his babbling, signaling for his mother to be wanting to be let down. Once she set him down the little boy immediately started to wobble his way over to Chooper, where he promptly fell on his behind and happily started to wildy gesture around.

"Is that - ? Why did- ? When-?", Zoro was lost for words and so were the others. It was Nami that spoke up first.

"(Y/N)...", she walked over to the other girl and hugged her tight, "I'm so sorry"

"You didn't know", she assured the navigator, "to be honest? I probably would have reacted the same way". She sent her friend a half-smile.

"Ma-ma?", the toddler demanded his mother's attention, two fists full of Chopper's fur in both of his chubby hands.

"Ah. No, no. Leave the nice Tanuki alone, honey", she walked over to the little boy scooping him up in her arms again, ignoring the ship doctor's protests over the misidentification.

Zoro cleared his throat to get her attention back to him. As much as he enjoyed the moment of reconciliation, he still thought there was some things the two of them had to talk about.

Within seconds the mood switched yet again and all of a sudden everybody was reminded of the reality of the situation they were in.

"Maybe we should give those two a minute or two...", Robin suggested.

"Yeah", (Y/N) answered but didn't take her eyes off of Zoro, "Sanji, why don't you cook something nice for us? The fridge should be stocked...". Her suggestion was met with instant approval from their ever hungry captain.

Sanji just nodded, still not having processed the newly gained information. How could the marimo be a father??

Nami made grabby hands towards the Mini-Zoro in (Y/N)'s arms. Usually she was rather unimpressed with babies. But this was different. This baby belonged to her best friend and... Zoro.

"Come to aunty Nami", (Y/N) didn't hesitate for a moment to hand him over to the red-head. Had it been Luffy or Usopp she'd think twice but she trusted Nami to take care of her baby.

"I'll leave you two to it, so you can talk", the navigator continued, "What's the little man's name by the way?"

"Oh, I decided to name him Sanji", (Y/N) answered seriously.

"Excuse me?!", Zoro was shocked.

"Just joking! I'm sorry", she tried to calm the mosshead down. From behind her, she could see Usopp and Nami snickering behind their hands and Sanji nearly dying of heart palpitations. "It's Sora", she added quietly as the others left her and the swordsman alone.

"Is (Y/N) coming back now?", the witch heard Chopper ask somewhere in the background but she didn't have the mental capacity to think about anything but Zoro at the moment.

"Sora...", he repeated thoughtfully once they were alone, "Does he- does he have my name?"

(Y/N) felt anxious. Would he like that?

"Well...", she started but had to stop because she didn't know what to say, "I mean... yeah?"

"Roronoa Sora...", Zoro didn't know how to properly express his feelings in the moment. Hell - he didn't even know himself. But he knew that he liked the sound of that.

"Why didn't you say anything?", he asked her. It was almost like a plea.

"Would it have changed anything? I didn't want to burden you"

"Burden me?", he was in disbelief, "How could you ever burden me?"

"Don't you understand? I was alone on this island. All alone and I had to make a decision" she was getting emotional - for the first time since her confession. There were no more jokes and funny digs to mask how she really felt.

Zoro felt terrible, he knew how hard it was for her to feel isolated and then to go through something like this without any help? When they first got together he would've never thought that he'd ever grow so attached to the girl but it didn't take long for him to really fall madly and deeply in love with her. Sometimes he'd feel bad that couldn't really express how he truly felt for her but he promised himself he would do anything in his power to protect her. But he couldn't even do that.

"You had your goal... and... and... I never wanted to hold you back", (Y/N) couldn't stop the tears from falling anymore. Being separated from him was the worst feeling in the world but she would give up everything and more for him.

Zoro pulled her into his chest, holding her close and tucking her head underneath his chin. From the way hear hands would immediately grab at his robe, it was noticeable how much she missed his touch.

"I'm so sorry. I'm sorry you had to go through all that. I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry you felt like you had to lie", he hated that she felt like she had to protect him. The crew - especially Nami - had been so terrible to her, "I love you more than anything..."

She pulled back and looked up at him. Tears still streaming down her face. Even now, he couldn't help but to think how beautiful she was. And for the first time in over two years his lips met hers.

The kiss wasn't hungry or sensual. Zoro could taste the salt from her tears on her lips but it didn't bother him at all.

Once they broke apart she smiled up at him, "I've missed you"

************************************************************************

"Are you sure?", Nami shouted down from the Sunny.

"A pirate ship is no place for a child", (Y/N) answered back.

It's been a week since the fight. The townspeople were already in the process of building up what's been broken and it was time for the Straw Hats to move on. Of course, the offered the witch to join them again but nothing changed for her. She had to think about her son first and foremost - as much as she would miss life on the sea. Most of the crew already boarded the ship. It was only Zoro left on the beach with (Y/N) and their son.

"I guess it's goodbye then, huh?", the witch had a sad smile on her face.

"I promise it's not forever. As soon as Luffy is pirate king I'll come back for you... both of you", the mosshead still wasn't the most secure in his new role as a father but as long as he had (Y/N) he knew that it'd be alright.

(Y/N) went in for what would be the last hug for a long, long time, "Promise me you'll be safe. Who's gonna make you take care of yourself when I'm not there?", she smiled.

The two of them exchanged a few more kisses and 'I love you's before the crew told them it was time to depart. During the last hug, Sora, who was seated in his mothers arm reached, out and grabbed his father's cheek with a happy laugh. Zoro furrowed his brows for a moment but then quickly started grinning.

"And you keep an eye out for your mother, yes?"

The toddler babbled as if to confirm that he understood his father's order.

A loud sob disrupted the family moment. When they turned to the Sunny they saw the whole crew smiling down at them - much to the discomfort of Zoro, who was still not entirely at ease with PDA. It was Franky that the initial sob came from. The cyborg has always been prone to tears but on closer examination it was almost the whole crew that was at least a little teary-eyed. Everyone except Luffy, who had a puzzled look on his face.

"Oi, that baby looks like Zoro..."

That sentenced earned him a hefty slap at the back of the head from nami and a hearty laugh from (Y/N).

"I'm gonna miss you guys so much", she smiled through tears.

"We'll be back before you know it, (Y/N)-chan~", Sanji shouted down to her.

"Oi! Let my girlfriend alone! Nobody's gonna miss you", the swordsman, who had joined the others on the ship by now, yelled at the cook.

(Y/N) stayed on the beach listening to the two of them fight until they were too far away to make out the words anymore. Then she turned to the little mosshead in her arms.

"Guess, it's just us now huh? Roronoa Sora..."

***

Tag List: @ikissnishiki, @multi-writer-personal-blog

[wombywoo]

The way you color things is so smooth, idk how you do it! Not sure which program you use for digital art, but is there a specific brush pack that you use? Or favorite brushes for coloring skin tones? 🤗

Thanks for the compliment <3 I use photoshop for all my art, and the main brush I use is this one below:

It's kind of a versatile sponge brush, and I use it for pretty much every aspect of my painting (even the lines!) alongside the plain old airbrush and smudge tool~

unfortunately I don't know where I downloaded it from 🤷‍♀️

For the skin tones, I don't vary from using this one as opposed to other fancier brushes, but I do have a freckle brush that I use, as well as this cloud-like brush for bruises and such 😚

again, I don't really remember where I downloaded my brushes, so I don't have a link or anything :'D

[journeytothewestresearch]

Can you please tell me what abilities sun wukong have because am always confused about it i even hear some people says that sun wukong is omniscient and omnipresent and can control time or that he is is a boundless character

At no point in JTTW is Monkey ever depicted as a boundless character with omniscience, omnipresence, and control over time. Anyone claiming that has never read the novel. Never ever trust any online claims about Sun Wukong unless a cited quote is provided.

Having said that, I am slowly compiling a comprehensive list of all of Monkey's magical abilities and skills, complete with corresponding Chinese terms and citations. However, I am nowhere close to being done (and won't be for years), so I can only give you a general list at this time. But I will link to my past articles where applicable.

The following is based on a list I wrote a few months ago for someone looking to make their D&D campaign more authentic.

Immortality - He has six layers of immortality. But these are more like layers of invulnerability. As a "bogus immortal" (yaoxian, 妖仙) he is still susceptible to injury and death because he hasn’t yet achieved Buddha-nature and broken free of the wheel of rebirth (see note #1 here for an explanation).

Invulnerability - He has an adamantine hide that can't be pierced or hurt by earthly or heavenly weapons and elements (this doesn't count the times that he allows himself to be cut). This is thanks to all of the immortal foodstuff he had eaten in heaven being refined within his body by his samadhi fire, giving him a "diamond body" (jingang zhi qu, 金鋼之軀). Sometimes he uses this invulnerability to freak out demons by blocking a sword strike with his bald head. However, he can still be hurt. For example, he is twice wounded by special elements born from spiritual cultivation, samadhi fire and wind (the book treats cultivated and heavenly elements as two different things). Also, one villain, a scorpion demoness energized with Buddhist dharma power, is able to successfully penetrate his skin by stinging him in the face with her tail.

72 changes - He can transform into anything. The only flaw is his tail, which doesn't always change the way he wants it to. Or, a character recognizes him because of his red butt.

Cloud somersault - This allows him to fly 108,000 li (33,554 mi / 54,000 km) in a single leap. The skill is actually a metaphor for instantaneous enlightenment, for those who achieve it will immediately arrive in the Buddha's paradise.

Magic hairs - He can change any one of his 84,000 hairs into anything he wants (tools, random objects, living creatures, etc.) These include hair clones, which are autonomous copies of himself that can range into the tens, hundreds, thousands, millions, or even billions. However, he only deploys these on a small scale in the novel. He never uses the power to its full stated extent.

Super strength - His greatest feat is carrying two mountains while running "with the speed of a meteor." But there are characters physically stronger than him. For instance, Monkey cannot escape the grip of the Great Peng bird once he is caught in his powerful talons.

Martial arts - He is proficient in armed and unarmed combat, being able to go toe-to-toe with deities with centuries more combat experience than him. "Short Fist," a historical style, is listed as his preferred boxing method. But he mainly relies on his magic iron staff for fighting.

General magic - Monkey is shown capable of calling forth gods and spirits, growing or shrinking to any size, parting fire and water, creating impassable barriers, conjuring wind storms, casting illusions, freezing people in place, putting anyone to sleep, unlocking any lock, bestowing superhuman strength, bringing the dead back to life, turning invisible, changing someone's appearance, traveling to and from heaven and hell, etc.

Magic Eyes - He can see through illusions. But this isn't always portrayed consistently, for I know of several times where Guanyin fools him, and even a god of the soil, a lesser deity, is once able to do the same thing.

Medicine - He can diagnose maladies and concoct medicines to solve the issue.

You can see that omniscience, omnipresence, and control over time are not listed. I think the problem is that people are confusing Sun Wukong at two different points in his character arc. The powers listed above come from the journey itself (ch. 13 to 100). The omni-level powers would come after he achieves Buddhahood at the end of the novel (ch. 100). However, it's very, very important to know that the story ends before Sun Wukong, now the "Victorious Fighting Buddha," performs any feats (i.e. he has no feats as a Buddha). I'm sure people could assign him powers ascribed to other Buddhas in religious literature, but what happens after the story ends is beyond canon.

I hope this helps.

[yingxtkm]

would you do aerith for the ask game? :D

Aye aye🫡 Lowkey took me a hot second to think of A and B for some reason 😂 I think I’m too far gone in my ‘reject canon reality’ AUs.

Headcanon A: Realistic

She and Tifa would share a room when they had the fortune of being able to stay at an inn instead of camping outside during their chase after Sephiroth. They would spend the nights together braiding each others hair and reminiscing their childhood, giggling about stupid boys (Tifa has a few stories of Cloud to share and Aerith is more than happy to hear it so she can tease him about it) and childish dreams and aspirations. It takes their mind off the reality of their situation and reminds them of simpler, happier times.

Headcanon B: While it may not be realistic it is hilarious

Would leave buckets out and other gardening tools around the church on purpose so Reno would trip over them when he’s assigned to come over and keep tabs on her. Every time he thinks he’s prepared for whatever trap she set up for him, she manages to catch him off guard. She somehow convinces everyone that she’s not doing this on purpose and now Reno sounds like the crazy, paranoid one.

Headcanon C: Heart-crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends

She keeps the pouch that Ifalna hid the white materia in in her dresser. It’s the only remaining keepsake from her birth mother that she has, and sometimes she would take it out and stare at it with wistful eyes, trying to remember the happy memories that have been gradually fading over the years.

The red color of the pouch is now faded but the leather and black drawstring still remain in pristine condition. She tucks it back into the corner of the drawer before she sneaks out the house to follow Cloud.

Headcanon D: Unrealistic, but I will disregard canon about it because I reject canon reality and substitute my own.

Oh y’all already know what’s coming up next. LAB SIBLINGS LAB SIBLINGS ‼️ Regardless of doomed or good ending, I adore the lab siblings headcanon and if lab siblings hc has no fans, then I am dead. I could go on forever about this hc but you already know the gist hehe 😇

TLDR: Awkward big brother Seph and menace little sister Aerith. She’s a nuisance to him until she’s not, and suddenly he can’t bear to lose her to Hojo’s schemes.

[freetory]

Week #12

How are black people limited in a professional space?

In the article, “Virtual Homespace”, Lee tells a story of how a business woman was told to cut her dreadlocks due to the unprofessional look of them. Her hair which took 10 years to grow was now a “distraction”, leaving her with a decision of cutting her hair or risk losing her job. This is unjust since hair can be very meaningful to some people, especially if it takes multiple years of your life to grow and care for. This suffocates the ability for certain people to restrict their ability to express themselves.

Are online communities involved enough to be equivalent to in person communities?

No, online communities will never suffice in person communities. I think this is because of the true connection one can make while talking to one another in person. Also, in online communities they can support people from all over the world, meaning you will most likely never see these people in person. I'm also led to believe that in person communities are more genuine, since it is a lot easier to lie in online communities. This can lead to connections being superficial, while connections in person can lead to true deep connections.

Why is the loss of privacy in the modern era not being discussed further on a day to day basis?

I suppose the loss of everyone's privacy isn’t being talked about enough because we don’t see it affecting our day to day life. The most conflict we get with losing our information is most likely scam calls, but in reality lots of our information is up for grabs for anyone to take and steal. In the documentary, “Surveillance”, they mention how the government has all the tools to monitor our every movement, yet the citizens do not seem to care. The reason can be split between because we are clueless of their abilities and because we have no control to stop them. To be able to keep our information safe, we are restricting a lot of assets we use on a day to day basis, such as our phone or any other electronic device.

How can we protect our online identity?

There are simple steps to protecting information online, such as using a VPN, or to not save passwords on the cloud. Once information is on the cloud, anyone can access your information, this meaning we should be more old school and write things down on a piece of paper. Adding on, one should use multiple passwords for different emails and different accounts such as for banks and credit cards. This limits the ability for information to be stolen throughout multiple apps.

McLaine, S. (2001). Ethnic Online Communities: Between Profit and Purpose. In D. Gauntlett (Ed.), Web.Studies: Rewiring Media Studies for the Digital Age. Arnold Publishers.

Hathaway, J. (2014, October 10). What is Gamergate, and why? An explainer for non-geeks. Gawker.

O'Neill, M., & Peltz, P. (Directors). (2020). Surveilled [Film]. HBO Documentary Films.

[evolutionsvoid]

As a goddess of life and an enjoyer of all worldly pleasures, Miteras possessed a voracious lust. While she did wish to find a viable mate to grant her child, she also had a need for sexual satisfaction. As a goddess, though, finding the right outlet was a bit difficult. Her mortal followers were more than happy to offer themselves for the role, but intercourse with them was lethal. Not only was relying on her followers and admirers not sustainable, as she would burn through her flock rather quickly, but sometimes they wouldn’t get the job done either. Thus, she turned to other methods to satisfy these urges. Looking to please the divine Allmother, her followers would collect various materials and objects that could be used for safe pleasuring. Some would be sculpted into phallic idols, while other items would be enjoyed raw. Using them appeased her lust, but as a goddess of fertility, her overwhelming power made even these simple tools potent mates. When satisfying herself with one of these sacred “Olisboi,” the essence of the object or material used would flow into her and would be the spark to create life within her godly womb. What was born from this act was alien and monstrous, taking on the properties of their inanimate “fathers.” Due to their conception, these children were incomplete and sterile, unable to fulfill Miteras' wish for a proper heir. Yet, she loved these children all the same. They were progress in her pursuit of creating fertile offspring, as at least these spawn lived while mortal born ones perished in the womb. They also served as proof of her divine power, able to create life from seemingly nothing. Yet to the Church, it was these abominations that would earn her the title of “Mother of Monsters.” 

The children born from these profane acts of self pleasure would come to be called the “Teraknon.” Monstrous offspring that would serve their beloved Mother and become terrors of the Church of Divine Wealth. The death and destruction they spread made them legends, until the Six Fingers of God were called upon by the Golden Pontiffs to end their reign. It was these battles between the Fingers and Teraknon that would go down in Church history. Each victory over these monsters etched into the slabs of legend, and forever immortalized in story, song and art. How could they not? As here was the glorious power of gold empowering the heroes of old to slay terrible demons from a blasphemous faith. Tales of victory from the Church’s youth, when they defeated a monstrous foe and became the leading power that rules to this day. 

When conflict between the early Church and Miteras arose, the Teraknon would be unleashed upon the land. The Church, and all those that dared denounce her, would face defilement and punishment. And when these monsters began their destructive missions, the Six Fingers of God were summoned to deal with them. Each member of this band of heroes would take on the Teraknon and strike them down with the blessings of gold. And one of the first of these many tales tells of how the proud warrior Tommel, bested the vile Teraknon known as Glebba.

Glebba, The Rotting One, was a putrid monstrosity of decayed flesh and pungent fungi. A foul beast whose disgusting odor was so wretched that legend says it could kill. However, the more likely culprit for anyone’s demise at the hands of Glebba was the parasitic spores he unleashed from his swollen tail. Glebba’s melting body was bloated with a seemingly endless supply of deadly spores, which exploded into ravenous fungal life when it made contact with fertile flesh. Those who were exposed to his deadly clouds would be consumed within seconds by the writhing growths, til all that remained was a garden of fungus and bones. With such an affinity, it was no surprise that he was “fathered” by a hardened mushroom. 

The terror Glebba reigned upon the Church’s land claimed several villages, the towns being buried in a forest of flesh-eating fungi. Yet, despite all this death, Glebba did not see it as a mission of destruction. Rather, he believed himself a herald of his dear Mother, spreading the gift of life to the world of non-believers. These spore clouds were merely a demonstration of Miteras’ power, allowing barren lands to become thriving and fertile. Glebba prided himself as being the child honored with the task of showing off his Mother’s gift. But to the people who perished to his spores, they did not see life, only death. As The Rotting One shambled across the land, the Finger Tommel was alerted to the monstrosity and tasked himself with slaying it.

However, when Tommel observed Glebba as he went about his “grand” mission, he quickly saw the problem with challenging such a putrid beast. Not only was Glebba capable of spraying deadly streams of spores, but his whole body was cloaked in a cloud of it. All it would take was a single exposure to its ravenous embrace and he would be consumed. Even if Tommel could make it past these dangers, actually damaging Glebba was also a death sentence. His body was so swollen with spores, that a single stab would cause this virulent miasma to spray out and kill the killer. This was not a battle he would be able to fight with a mere blade, as plenty of soldiers had tried and failed to kill Glebba. It would seem like an impossible task, but Tommel was wise to consult the wisdom of the golden Ichor. He prayed to it and it whispered back to him what he had to do. 

With the guiding words of Ichor in his mind, he set off on his mission. He took with him his trusty poleaxe and a container of blessed bile salt. He mapped out Glebba’s path, seeking out the perfect battleground. Tommel would locate a village that had once been aligned with Miteras, until the Church had come through and cleansed it and its inhabitants. The scorched land was perfect for Tommel’s plan, so he went about sprinkling the bile salts while consecrating the burnt village with holy words. When that was done, he hid his poleaxe nearby and donned the clothes of a commoner, hiding his warrior nature. He then went out to meet Glebba, though he was sure to remain upwind of this putrid beast. When he spotted The Rotting One, he called out to the shambling corpse.

“Oh, Bringer of Life! Wondrous Herald of Our Divine Mother! Fate has blessed me with such a glorious meeting, for I am in dire need of Mother’s gift!” These words made Glebba stop in his tracks, flattered by such compliments. 

“Faithful soul, your kind words bring much pride to our glorious Mother and I. We would be honored to grant our blessing to aid you. Tell us, what woe ails you?”

“Great Bearer of Allmother’s Gift, my home was destroyed by the vile Church, my family and lands burned to cinder. I wish to give peace to my loved ones by rebuilding our lost home, but the land is barren and lifeless. Nothing can grow from the spoiled soil, leaving their graves cold and empty. Please, Glorious Herald, bring life back to our ruined home!” To this The Rotten One chuckled. “The foolish Church believes itself greater than Mother, and would have you think they can best her wondrous gifts. Take me to your village, and I will show you how wrong they are!” With that, Tommel led the way for Glebba, being sure to keep a far distance from the deadly beast. He brought The Rotting One to the burnt village and begged him to bless it. Glebba was more than happy to comply.

“Stand back, faithful one, and see the wonders our dear Mother can do.” With that, he aimed his tail and let loose a great spray of spores. The ravenous cloud descended upon the scorched remains and the two waited. But as they sat there, nothing happened. The spores did not grow, the land remained dead. Confused, Glebba let loose another rain of his seed but once again no fungi arose. 

“Has the Church truly doomed my village?” Tommel asked desperately, pretending to be horrified. “Is their power truly that strong?” Such thought angered Glebba, who would not have the Church best him or Miteras. 

“Nonsense! The wretched Church is no match for Mother’s gift!” He snapped, refusing to back down and tarnish the reputation of his dear Mother. “I merely held back the first time, but now I shall show you my true power!” And with that he fired off another round of spores. Then another. And another. But each time he did so, the land would not accept his seed. The salt and blessings Tommel had used upon this wrecked village burned away his spores, yet Glebba refused to admit defeat. Again and again, he unleashed his power, only to be met with failure. Every time it would seem he was hesitating, Tommel would inquire if this meant the Church was stronger than Miteras. This would goad The Rotting One into trying again, even when it was clear his power had no sway here. So determined he was to prove that he was a true bringer of life, Glebba released every speck and spore in his body, til he dropped from sheer exhaustion. It was this moment of weakness that Tommel had been waiting for. In a flash, he retrieved his hidden weapon. With all his spores spent, Glebba had no defense to ward away his executioner. Tommel took his poleaxe and decapitated that weakened monstrosity, ending the reign of The Rotting One once and for all. 

This tale would live on to show the falsities of Miteras’ claims of being a goddess of life, as clearly the power of Ichor banished Glebba’s shallow “gift.” The corpse of this putrid creature would be cleansed through the power of Ichor and stripped of its deadly nature. It would then be buried in the Church’s holy gardens, where it would feed their bountiful crop and show who truly wielded the power of life. It is believed that this act was what inspired the ritual of burying a sacrificed beast in a farm field or garden to ensure healthy growth and a bountiful harvest.      

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Goddess girls make do, and that's how you get a manti-spore!

[dragonagegayz]

Fragment Friday

Literally, I just want to show some work off so I'm just starting this as a trend for me but like others are more than welcome to join :D

So for Fragment Friday I want to see some fragments of the work you've been working on! Be it arts, writing, gifs, collages, etc! Whatever work you got cooking, let us see! (Can be anything!) Also, highlight/color a fragment that you are particularly proud of!

Tag either the number of people equal to the things you shared or stage however many people you want or don't want! I'm not in charge of you, you stick it to the man and do whatever you want

For me personally, I'm going to be showing off some things I've been working on for my Rook Bas De Riva, A piece of the past, the beginning of my IllarioXBas smut and the Rookanis smut I've been working on!

Past

(Suicide Contemplation Mentioned)

I have always hated the rain, the stench of the sea air that permeates through Par Vollen even with us not close to the water, I have always hated the salty air. It becomes dark too, I already cannot see well with the mask I am forced to wear as Sarrebas, the small holes practically blind me which I suppose is what eh Qun wants of one like me. The rain also catches in the little holes, making it even harder to see, the combination of it all leaves me blind. I look up to the clouds, if my mouth weren’t sewn shut I would have yelled to the clouds for being here, for making my life hard, though as I look up I can barely see a light spot in the clouds, the sun. Maybe it will shine si at least I can see again.

“Saarebas!” I hear an angry unforgiving voice that I know all too well. I looked over to where it came from, my ears being trained now to pinpoint the locations of things since I was masked those years ago. I needn’t try to squint to know who it is, I, unfortunately, know who screamed my name. Even from where I stood, unseeing as I was, I could tell he was annoyed, it was in the tone in his authoritarian voice, the hint of displeasure and rasp to it that tipped me off. “What are you doing?! Move it!” He growls out as a threat, as if I have any choice but to obey.

‘I am cursing at the clouds,’ I think with a light frown, were I to do too deep with it, he would catch the lines on my face moving and punishment would come in tow. ‘Does the qun not even allow my own thoughts anymore? Is a tool not entitled to be angry in conditions where they know doing their job will become harder?’ I wish to say, but instead, I do not speak. I simply follow where the voice is speaking, and hear the sounds of his steps move when I am near, I find them in the low crowd from the distinct heaviness to them. He puts much pressure on his heel, and heavy steps with his entire body to emphasize power and dominance. Arvaard do this often, many of them I have come in contact with are power-hungry and play the high and mighty part. They are the keepers of the Sarrebas, those dangerous things, how could they not the proud? It is what the Qun has taught them after all.

We walk in the rain, keeper and tool one behind the other for I can never step in front, they would assume a demon has taken over me were I to ever. I do wonder what they feel as they lead sometimes, but I know better than to let those foolish thoughts wander and become too grand and a man will kill themselves when the ideas in their head are better than the life they are forced to lead. I had seen it happen a few times in the Qun, A Saarebas or two have done such things in front of me. There are times I would feel jealous, if I were not a coward I would do whatever I could to be free. Yet the Qun forbids it, so I do not allow myself those dreams.

Illario X Bas

(This one is in very, very rough early stages places right now lol but I wanted to share this dialogue)

He learned the man’s name was Bas, he was a former Saarebas of the Qun and was adopted into the De Riva household nearly 15 years ago. He was in his late 40s, a talented mage, and rather known to have a bit of a mouth on him, especially when it came to matters of the Qun. He was a bit of a lone wolf and had struggled to find safety and trust amongst the Crows up until recently. Bingo, a perfect time to approach the man to present them working together, on a House Dellamorte contract no less. He was sure of his chances.

So imagine the younger man’s surprise when he finally managed to set up a meeting at Cafe Petra with a grand presentation on this contract out on a Treivso noble who needed killing, with any wink he could ass, any drawl of his words he could get away with only for the qunari to look blankly at him. Illario fidgeted a little under the blank, cold gaze of the older man before a blunt simple answer came.

“No,”

“No?” He had asked back, more out of shock than anything,

“No,” Bas repeated again as if that was all he needed to say.

Illario tried to fight the frown he wanted to make and instead presented what he hoped was a full smile. “Why no?”

There was a brief pause as a look overcame the larger man, one that spoke as if the question was a completely foolish ask. “I am not worthy,” Was what the qunari said.

That… trufully hadn’t been what the man was expecting to hear, he had half expected to hear something about pride, how Crows should figure their own ways and not depend on others, the usually speech he got from older Crows but Bas had defiently challeneged his expectations of these things, as he woudl late do over and over and over again.

And do that was the beginning of their unusual working relationship.

And on this contract, they worked, (after a near week of convincing the qunari that yes, he was worthy and that he would be a help not a hindrance to the contract) nearly meeting every day to discuss their plans which went well into the evenings and even early mornings. Bas listened, he gave his own recommendations, and was receptive to whatever Illario would change to or argue against. It was different from the treatment he got from the other Crwos, especially his family, to be respected and listened to was unusual.

As well as the qunari’s blatant ignorance of Illario’s flirting.

Rookanis

(God I'm so excited to share this one when I finally finish it)

“Read,” Bas demanded through gritted teeth.

There was no fanfare as he ripped down his pants, that big length bobbed out with his juice already leaking from him as it gave an angry wink at her. Instantly as the words came from his mouth, the other Crow’s hands returned to touch those slippery fingers back at his hole and the warm mouth taking in his dick again, slowly this time, only about an inch. Lucanis arched a little as the finger slipped into him but he was sure to keep reading even though his voice shook. The Lady had to touch it, she absolutely had to touch it as she reached down to do that but a quick, fast as lighting of a hand grabbed her leg and pulled it up so her wet cave was angled up towards it, ready to slide in easy. “You think I’d let you have the pleasure of touching my cock? Think again My Lady, this isn’t about you tonight. It’s about me and this big thing fucking you every which way until you’re begging, screaming to cum. Maybe if you’re a good little whore, you’ll get what you want,” A muffled chuckle came from Bas, and while Lucanis did not stop, he threw a glare over the book to his lover but the man considering the way it vibrated against his cock. The finger that had been teasing slipped back into him, another already playing at the rim next to the one snugly pushed in. As he spoke, he was rubbing his length up and down her sloppy hole, passing up where she really wanted it to tease, to make her shake even more. Had this Rogue always been such a bastard of a tease, so cruel and unforgiving as to not give his hot, heavy rod right this minute after all of his teasing? Lucanis felt his face flush even harder as he read the words aloud, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment to bask in the feeling he was being overwhelmed with and to try and beat down the embarrassment churning in his stomach. Had this book always been this… cheesy or was the man’s taste in books just not particularly good?

There was a slight pause in Bas’ movements and it was a bit of a scrambled panic to find his place again, desperate not to get the other man to stop.

She tried not to yelp as an unexpected finger came by to tease the rim of her other hole, not slipping in either just pressing down. “Soon I’ll fuck this one too, won’t even give you a choice but to take, take, take what I give. Maybe I could tie you down, lock you in a room so I can use you whenever I want,” There was a bit of stuttering as he read the line. It felt filthy coming from his lips. His breathing picked up, breath hot against the pages of the book. The other finger slipped in, the stretch slowing down as the qunari took his time to let Lucanis get used to the stretch. Arabella looked up at Zade, watching him grunt in concentration as her slick began to drip down onto the bed as she thought ‘Yes gods, please do that. Lock me away for you, only for you to use,’ The First Talon felt more than heard the responding moan he got, those vibrations going through his dick where the qunari had it buried in his throat. His thighs tensed at the feeling and his breathing hitched in his throat for a second but he was quick to fill his lungs and start to read again, though this time his voice was much airier than it had been. But all she could do was moan, hoping her feelings could come across in the downright filthy sounds she found herself making. The way the rogue looked down at her told her she was getting somewhere.

Another finger pressed against his hole and instinctively, the younger man grabbed for the other with one hand, his fingers coming up to wrap and thread themselves around the long strands of his large lover’s hair on his head. He pressed the book against his face as he found himself lost in the sensation of pleasure as Bas began to move on his cock, a slow up and down with his mouth while pressing the large third finger in. Three fingers, especially as large as the mage’s, also took the assassin a moment to adjust to. It was good, that wasn’t the issue but damn if it wasn’t so overwhelming, even now. “Kadan~” A teasing voice broke through the pleasurable haze as Lucais found the warmth around his cock had pulled away, with the fingers nearly following suit. Panic came over him as he scrambled to get his eyes on the page and to keep reading. As soon as the words left his mouth, the fingers sunk back in, the mouth returned to his dock but only to give attention to the weeping head, not that he minded. The following growl he gave did too, as she suddenly found herself entered withthe full force of his girth bearing down into her, not stopping till the tip was buried deep within her, playing with her cervix. right as he spoke those words, a particular cruel thrust came from the fingers buried within him, aimed straight for the bundle of nerves that had him bowing his back. The hand at had wrapped around his leg earlier tightened, a quiet command to control his hips, and the Crow just about managed to settle them back into place, despite the onslaught of pleasure he felt deep inside him.

She was so full, it felt as if her guts were being rearranged with just how close and much he was buried within her, if she were to reach down she knew she would be able to feel the very tip of his cock outlined in his stomach.

The two men shared a moan between the two of them, Bas’ muffled being buried on the First Talon’s cock.

Tag me and use the tag Fragment Friday so I can see our your beautiful words pwease

OMG FORGOT TO AT MY TAGS

So if @adhd-riddled-crow, @whispersleo and @alystrin03 have anything they are wokring on and want to share like I would love to see it but no pressure or anything I just love ur guys things so much <3 (Any you too reader, you should show me ur things too ((NOT LIKE THAT)))