#danneel x child!reader

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

A Place To Call Home: Redux

Summary: In this special part of APTCH, we're going way back. What if things went differently? What if the reader was removed from the Ackles home after only a few months? What if she blamed them for letting her go? What if she found out the truth about her birth parents from the start? What exactly would that do to this father/daughter duo's bond and would it be able to be salvaged? Find out in this special AU from the main APTCH timeline!

Masterlist

Pairing: Jensen x foster daughter!reader

Word Count: 16,600ish

Warnings: language, angst, mentions of prior abuse (not descriptive), family drama, all the tears

A/N: When I wanted to return to the APTCH world, I've always had this idea of what if the reader hadn't known the full truth about her parents accident? What if she'd been forced to leave? This is strictly a one-off AU part where I got to explore the answers to those questions and see new sides to everyone.

This part takes place during Part 4 of APTCH. This part starts with some text from that italicized before divulging into the story. I can't wait to hear your thoughts! Please enjoy!

__________

Two Months Later

“Y/N?” asked Zeppelin. You lifted your head up from where you were laying in the grass in the backyard, staring up at the sky. “Cole’s here.”

You looked past him, seeing Cole walk down the slope of the yard with Jensen, Danneel playing with the girls, a nervous look on her face.

“Go back to mommy, Zepp,” you said, Zepp running past Cole and Jensen, Jensen’s face hard. You saw another set of people walk down the yard, a police officer and a woman from Cole’s office you recognized. You instantly stood up, Jensen staring at the ground when he and Cole stopped in front of you. “Cole, why are you here? With them?”

“You know why,” he said.

“Look at me,” you barked at Jensen, his head whipping up. “Did you-”

“No. Kiddo, no. We got a call this morning that said we failed our last check in,” said Jensen. “I’m so sorry.”

“I’m not leaving,” you said, Cole sighing. “You’re going to have to drag me out of here.”

“I don’t agree with the failed check in. They’ve done nothing wrong and you’re like a different person, Y/N. I petitioned for you to stay. But their foster parent privileges are going to be revoked,” said Cole.

“I want to see the failed check in. I can request to see my file. I know I can,” you said.

“Inappropriate relationship with a foster child was cited as a cause,” said Cole.

“Who had final sign off?” you said. “I sure as shit know you know neither one of them are inappropriate with me.”

“I signed off,” said the woman as she walked over, Jensen shooting her a quick glare. “This publicity stunt for the Ackles is over. It was tolerated but there is evidence of Jensen becoming too physically close.”

“Excuse me?” you said.

“His recent postings on Instagram show you two in a suggestive position,” she said. “When you were seated on his lap.”

“Excuse me?” you said again. “I was holding Zepp in my lap too. It wasn’t inappropriate. Cole, do something.”

He took your arm and pulled you aside, letting out a sigh. “Y/N. I know it wasn’t. Anyone with half a brain can see that but Mrs. Keller has the power to move any foster and she wants you moved. I promise I’ll do what I can to get you back here as soon as I can. I-”

You stared over at where Danneel sat with the kids, eyes on you, gaze shifting to where Jensen was arguing with Mrs. Keller. 

“Did they give me up Cole?” you asked quietly. “Did the Ackles-”

“No. At least not that I know of. But Mrs. Keller is saying they failed a check-in.”

“They’re going to lose their license to foster,” you said. He nodded. “But they have money. They can fight it if they want-”

“Sweetie, you’ll turn eighteen before it was settled legally. The state will fight back and it’ll get drawn out. I can’t believe I’m saying this but you’re probably better off…sticking it out in whatever home you get placed in and when you’re eighteen, you could come back here-”

“Assuming they actually wanted me. They have so much money, Cole. If they really wanted me…they wouldn’t let me go,” you whispered. “How do you know they didn’t turn me in behind your back? How do you know?”

Cole was quiet, closing his eyes.

“See? You don’t know for sure. I bet they didn’t fail a check-in. It’s just their way of getting rid of me and saving face.” You glared at Jensen when he turned his head in your direction. “If you didn’t want me, at least have the balls to say it to my face!”

Cole sighed as you stormed inside the house. Fuck those people. Fuck Jensen especially. He was so full of shit. You knew, you knew, this whole thing was a sham from the start. All he ever wanted was to show what a wonderful person he was to the world and once that was done, he was dumping your ass.

You slammed your bedroom door shut, locking it behind you. He was going to come in there and try to bullshit you some more. Him or Dee. But you weren’t falling for it again. No, you were packing up your shit and getting the fuck out of there for good.

Jensen was standing there when you ripped open the door five minutes later but you simply shoved past him for the bathroom. “Y/N-”

“Don’t say a fucking word to me,” you snapped. You swept the few products you had into a small bag, hoping it would hold you over for awhile. Quickly, you got it inside your duffel bag, Jensen reaching out for you when you stepped into the hallway. He was smart enough to pull his hand back though before he could touch you. “Move.”

“We didn’t do this,” he said, a harsh edge to his voice. “Y/N, I swear to god we want you to stay. This is killing me.”

“I never should have trusted you,” you said, pushing on his shoulder, Jensen closing his eyes. “I-I trusted you. I thought you cared about me. I thought you might have actually wanted to be my…I knew you were just acting. I fucking knew I was a pawn for you in your fancy little life. I can’t believe I fell for it.”

“That is not true and deep down you know it,” he said. You rolled your eyes, brushing past him. “Y/N, Y/N stop-”

“You’re not my foster dad anymore. I don’t have to do a thing you say,” you called back. 

“You are my daughter.” You stopped in your tracks, looking over your shoulder. His jaw was clenched, eyes full of worry. “And I’m your dad. I will bring you back home, understand me? We will find a way to get you back home to your family, no matter how long it takes.”

“I’m eighteen in nine months, Jensen. I’m getting the fuck out of this shitty system the moment I can and when I do? You come near me again and I’ll call the cops on you myself. Am I clear?” He shook his head, getting closer.

“We’ll earn it back,” he said, lifting his chin. “I’ll earn it back. Your trust. Your love because I know you loved us and just couldn’t say it. So we’ll start from scratch, less than scratch if we have to. Hate me and hate Dee. Do what you need to these next nine months to survive because I know you can do it. I fucking know you can. The second you are out of this system that keeps hurting you, I will be there and I will bring you home, understand? I will call you, text you, facetime you everyday. We are not through, okay? We-”

You ripped your phone from your pocket, tossing it on the ground, watching the screen shatter. You shook your head, adjusting the strap on your shoulder.

“No more lies, Jensen. Stay the hell away from me.”

“At least say goodbye to the kids,” he said when you started to walk for the front door. “Y/N!”

“They’ll be fine. Better to learn young how much the world sucks.”

“Y/N-”

You flipped him the bird as you left, finding Cole leaning against the hood of his car. “So where the hell am I staying tonight?”

“They deserve a proper goodbye,” he said, nodding around to the backyard. 

“The twins will forget I exist in six months and JJ will too in a few years. Let’s go,” you said, opening his backseat and tossing your duffel inside. Cole gave you that look, his disappointed one you so rarely saw from him, before you got in the passenger seat.

“The Ackles are good people. I’ll find out-”

“Cole. Please just stop,” you said, leaning your head against the glass. You jerked it upright when you saw Jensen and Danneel step outside the front door, looking like deer caught in headlights. “Take me to house fifteen.”

“Y/N-”

“Get me away from here. Now.”

The Next Day

“Hey,” said Cole as you leaned against the post of the car port at the new foster home. “How’s it going so far?”

You gave him your best bitch face, Cole nodding. “It’s fine.”

“Be careful of this guy. I’ve heard rumors of physical abuse but no proof and no kid would ever say anything. Lock the door at night or better yet, push the dresser in front of it.” You looked past him to the crappy house across the street. “I’m serious.”

“And I’m serious about getting emancipated.” 

“This shit again? You do not have a job, Y/N-”

“I got my working papers from my new high school earlier. There’s no other kids here for me to look out for so when i’m not in school, I’ll be working.” He sighed. “Cole-”

“You can’t access your parents assets until you’re older. If…if you could, maybe we could make it work but-”

“Then get me access,” you growled. He narrowed his eyes, pointing a finger in your face.

“I fucking tried,” he said. “Do not treat me like the bad guy, Y/N. I have always tried to get you into good homes with good people and I really, really looked into emancipation for you. But you are a ward of the state and the state won’t admit they’re a shitty parent no matter how true it is.”

You crossed your arms, lips pursed. “Then line up the paperwork so that the day I turn eighteen, I’m out of the system.”

“This guy will kick you out of the house the second you age out. You’ll be homeless if you choose to leave.”

“Well that’s my problem, isn’t it? I’ll spend from now until then working my ass off and saving up. I’ll only have five months of high school left after that. I can bounce around shelters until I graduate-”

“Are you listening to yourself?” scoffed Cole. “I am not letting you be homeless.”

You rolled your eyes, Cole stepping closer.

“Your stubbornness made you a survivor and some days I am grateful for it because I know there’s shit that happened to you that you won’t even admit to me. I know you could do it all on your own if you had to. But I haven’t worked my ass off since you were ten fucking years old for you to give up.”

“I am not giving up. I’m growing up. I’m turning eighteen and getting the fuck out of this fucked up town and maybe I’ll find some people with a shred of decency. You never fucking did,” you balked. You walked away, putting your back to him. You heard him behind you, felt him stop close by as you scrunched up your face.

“That family loves you. I have had fosters get adopted by families before and see those connections. Well, I have some news for you. Jensen and Danneel? Kid, they are the best kind of person for you. You are not their foster daughter to them. You are not the potential adoptee. You are not the girl with different parents. You were not made by them but you are theirs and they love you as if you were their blood.”

“It’s a fucking act, Cole. Don’t you fall for it-” you said, spinning around, cutting yourself off when he handed you a dark green iphone.

“I could lose my job for this,” he said, shoving it into your hands. “You don’t have to speak to them but they want…they need you to know that you can always call on them and they will come. When you turn eighteen, they’ll be here if that’s what you decide.”

“Cole.” He shook his head. “They threw me away!”

“I don’t know what happened but I’d bet my fucking life they had nothing to do with this. When I checked on them this morning, they begged me to get their daughter back. Begged, Y/N. You want to grow up? Then trust your heart for once. They will come back for you if you let them. Give them a chance to.”

You frowned, Cole giving you one.

“Do you need anything?” he asked. You shook your head, kicking your foot against the ground. “Stay safe, kiddo. Put in one of those anonymous calls you like to do if this guy tries anything.”

“Anyone ever tell you how annoying you are?” you called as he headed for the inside of the house.

“Give them a chance, kiddo.”

You laid in bed that night, your new phone vibrating from where you hid it under your pillow from your new foster dad, aka Mac, aka the asshole. You’d been at two other homes before with a single dad and neither had been good. They’d done it just for the extra money and you’d never felt comfortable at either. But back then you were much younger, only a kid and a pre-teen and there’d been other kids around.

Now it was a seventeen year old you alone with a sketchy at best guy in his late forties. You glanced at the chair you’d propped under the door handle, sighing. You’d gotten too used to not being cautious with the Ackles. You were going to need to make sure you spent as little time as possible in this house.

You grabbed the phone, pouting at the text that came up.

Jensen: I know you hate me and Dee. We’re fighting this failed check in bullshit but the lawyer was honest with us. There’s no guarantee we win the appeal. But no matter what, we’ll be there when you need us, whether we’re your foster parents or not. We’re not supposed to contact you but we need you to know you’re not alone. We are here for you everyday. We are going to do everything we can to bring you home as soon as we can. No matter what happens, the second you’re eighteen, I’ll be there to get you. I understand if you don’t want to answer me. Be safe. We love you, tall munchkin.

“No you fucking don’t,” you mumbled, turning the phone off before hiding it again. “Please just leave me alone.”

Three Months Later

“Hey Andrea?” you asked on a late Friday afternoon. Your boss from the restaurant and bar you worked at grunted from her back office. “I finish up with school next Tuesday and was wondering if I could get more hours for the summer?”

“More hours?” she asked, lifting her head up. “Don’t you have another job?”

“Yeah but I like this job better,” you said, giving her a friendly smile. 

“You like this job better because I pay you under the table.”

“It works for me, it works for you…come on, you know I’m a good server,” you said. She frowned but sighed.

“I can bump you up to twenty five hours but that’s it.” You grinned, Andrea rolling her eyes. “Go grab some lunch and get out of here.”

“You’re the best,” you said on your way out. After bringing out a bag of trash to the dumpster, you washed up and got the chef to whip you up an extra large chicken wrap with a side of mac and cheese. You got a free meal for each shift and it’d helped immensely considering how Mac hardly ever kept any food in the house. Almost all his meals came from take out or going out with his friends. Between your two restaurant jobs thankfully you were able to not be hungry most days.

You packed up the food in a container and walked a few blocks down to a park, finding your usual bench before digging in. 

“Y/N!” You jumped in your seat, spilling your late lunch on the ground. You growled as a figure appeared before you. You glared up at a sweaty Jensen, his face red as he put his hands on his hips. “I missed you at work and tried to catch up but I couldn’t find parking and never mind but I-”

“You made me drop my food,” you snapped. He looked down at your feet, a wince on his face.

“I’m sorry. We can go get something-”

“You give me twenty bucks and then get the fuck away from me or I swear I’ll start screaming.” He blinked at you, his breathing slowing down. “Jensen, I am serious.”

“I…Y/N we won the appeal. You can come home,” he said. You narrowed your eyes, his head cocking. “I know you blocked our numbers but Y/N a lot has happened. Cole’s on his way over to pick you up and take you to a private session with the district attorney and some people from the state’s office. I can’t be in the room but-”

“You just don’t stop, do you?” you scoffed, standing. You pushed on his chest, Jensen taking a step back. “News flash, I don’t want to go anywhere with you ever again.”

“Y/N, we didn’t get rid of you,” he breathed out. “We’ve been working on getting you back home every single day.”

“Stop lying to me!” you shouted, your face scrunching up. “I’m just something for you to prop yourself up with. Look how amazing we are, taking in a poor little orphan girl. If you gave a shit about me, you wouldn’t have let it happen in the first place.”

A part of you knew you were being unreasonable but you’d been on your own for three months and you knew the only person you could rely on was yourself. Jensen hid the hurt on his face quickly, replacing it with a neutral expression.

“You can hate me. You can hate me for as long as you like. But you are coming home to us after you sort things out with Cole. We are your foster family again and someday you’ll be able to admit that you know you’re just lashing out because you’re angry. Because we will be there for you after the fact. Because we love you and care about you and deep down in places you don’t like to admit exist, you might even care about us too.”

“I will never care about you again,” you whispered. “And I will never, ever, trust you.”

Jensen stepped closer, staring you down, his jaw clenched. “I guess I’ll just have to prove you wrong again.”

“Good fucking luck with that.” You sat down, crossing your arms. “You can go.”

“Once Cole gets here.” You flipped him off, Jensen taking a seat on the bench across the path, sighing as he went. “Please try to remember that I love you.”

You didn’t respond. Maybe he really did love you. Maybe you really were just angry after he let you get taken. But there was nothing he could say you wanted to hear. 

You still hurt too much.

Four Hours Later

You knew people were talking around you. Lawyers. People from the state department. The head of foster care for the state. FBI agents. District attorneys and half of the local foster care office.

Cole sat by your side at the far end of the table, arguing with someone on the other side. The voices were loud, blame being passed around. Threats of lawsuits were in every other word. So many people, so many strangers shouting about your life like you weren’t even there.

You stood up, catching Cole’s attention first but slowly the others took notice, so many pairs of eyes on your numb face.

“What is it, Y/N?” Cole asked, rising to his feet beside you. You blinked slowly, scanning the room once. 

“I don’t care about Mrs. Keller and that she blamed my parents for her son’s death in the car accident. I don’t care that my parents didn’t die in the accident and went into witness protection and then didn’t or whatever the fuck they did. I don’t care that they gave me up and that state, you people, are my guardian. I don’t give a shit that none of you realized or that those who did cared more about your fucking case than a ten year old girl. I don’t care that my parents never wanted me and they don’t a shit about me. I don’t care, I don’t fucking care so stop fucking yelling. Please.”

Thirty different sets of eyes stared at you, a heavy guilt settling in the air.

“I’m not a pawn in your blame games. I’m a person who’s life you fucked up. I won’t sue you. I don’t care about that shit. All I want is to go home to the Ackles. I want to stay with them and if they ever decide they want to adopt me, you’re going to approve it on the spot. No dragging it out for months or years. They get it that day. Understand?”

You saw the head of foster care nod, your eyes closing.

“If you people have nothing else to say to me, can I please go home?” There was a quiet murmur and then you felt Cole’s arm around your shoulders.

“Yeah, it’s been a long day. Let’s get you home, Y/N.”

Cole grabbed you some fast food on the way to the Ackles house, your house, but you had no appetite. You’d felt a lot of things in life but this…dejection, was something entirely new. You were so numb you couldn’t even cry.

No one in your life had ever wanted you. Not a single soul. Except for the family you’d pushed away, yelled at, been cruel to. 

There was no way they’d want you after all that. Why would they? You were so fucked up, no one ever would.

“Y/N. Y/N!” shouted Cole. You blinked, his car parked in the Ackles driveway. “Jesus, are you with me?”

“I’m just tired, Cole,” you whispered. You slid out of the car, Cole grabbing your duffel from the backseat. You barely made it to the cover of the front porch before the door opened and you saw Jensen and Danneel come out. 

“Hey guys,” said Cole quietly, setting your duffel on the table, your gaze drifting past them, looking out to the dark water of the river beyond. “She’s…had a long day.”

“Hey, kiddo,” said Jensen but you didn’t look at him, a cold creeping feeling settling through your bones. You knew they were exchanging looks with Cole, a heavy sigh coming from him.

“Be gentle,” you heard him murmur. “Get her back in therapy asap.”

“Are you hungry? I can make you something,” said Danneel as you stared outside. “Y/N?”

“No thank you,” you said, voice flat, picking up your duffel and taking the bag of food. “All I want to do is eat this, take a shower and go to bed.”

“Your room’s all set, honey,” said Jensen, letting you slip past him. You slowed your steps when you felt their stares on your back. But it wasn’t them that made you come to stop. No, it was the picture on the wall next to the hallway to your room that caught your attention. It’d been some professional picture before, one from when the twins were newborns and the rest of them.

Now it housed a photo you remember not feeling like you should have been part of. Jenen’s arm was around your shoulders, the other holding up Arrow. Zep was in Dee’s arms while JJ stood in front of you with a big grin. You remembered taking it at Jensen’s birthday party a few days before you’d left, trying your hardest to stay out of the family photos but he kept finding you every time you tried to run away.

And you’d thought they’d betrayed you.

You took off down the hall, closing your bedroom door quickly behind you. The room didn’t smell like cleaner yet it was which meant they were in the habit of regularly dusting it. There wasn’t anything out of the ordinary in there except for Dee’s blanket you’d stolen a long time ago and a hoodie of Jensen’s you’d worn a few times when it’d gotten a tad too cold out at night for you. 

You sighed when you picked up the framed drawing on your desk of the family, JJ’s judging by the quality but you could see where the twins had gotten their hands on it. You had to put it down and flip it over when you saw she’d put you in it.

You pushed away the rising bile in your throat and forced yourself to eat part of the burger so there was at least something in your stomach. After chucking the leftovers in the garage, you took a long shower, a basket full of new products waiting for you on the counter.

Fucking considerate assholes. Why did you have to be such a bitch to them? They never gave you up and…

“It’ll never go back to how it was,” you whispered to yourself. You ducked your head under the water and turned it cold, trying to figure out what the hell you were supposed to do.

You were finally back home with people that wanted you. Had wanted you at least. But now? Who knew if they’d let you in all the way again? 

Who knew if you’d ever forgive yourself for hurting them. Maybe you’d been the asshole all along. Maybe you were never a good kid and everyone saw it but you.

You slammed the water off and dressed in a pair of pajama shorts and an oversized shirt, throwing Jensen’s hoodie on when you were back in your room to help with the chill you’d self-inflicted. It warmed you some but a faint whiff of his cologne came off the fabric, your gut churning once more. With a sigh, you sat down on the edge of the bed, staring out your dark window. To your surprise, and you were grateful for it, no one came to talk to you. It seemed like a long time but eventually you heard Cole’s car drive off and saw the front lights dim. The house was quiet. Still.

It was after ten and you had the sense that Jensen and Danneel had retreated to the confines of their bedroom to talk about you in hushed whispers.

You tried to lay down but no matter how exhausted you were, sleep wouldn’t come. Your brain couldn’t turn off, couldn’t relax. For hours and hours the same questions kept running through your mind.

Why hadn’t your birth parents given you up for adoption when you were young? Why hadn’t they planned it better with their FBI handler? Why’d the FBI just let them go when they ran off? Why had no one put it together about Mrs. Keller’s son being killed in the accident? What was so wrong with you no one wanted you?

Were you even capable of knowing what love felt like?

You bolted out of bed, storming out of your room and down the hall. Fuck, you needed air. You went out on the back porch, standing in the dark and watching the dark waves in the distance, the scattered lights along the houses on the opposite side of the river.

“I can’t sleep either.” You didn’t turn but felt Jensen come to stand beside you, a glass of water in hand. “You get any at all tonight?”

You shook your head, Jensen offering the water to you. You slowly took it, drinking the cold liquid down in big gulps. When you handed him the glass, he set it down on the outdoor table before returning to lean his forearms against the railing.

God, he looked fucking…sad. 

“S’funny.” You glanced up at his dark face, his focus on the backyard, eyes glancing up at the few bright stars poking through overhead. 

“What is?” you said, a strange lack of emotion in your voice that should have concerned you but you were too tired to care. Jensen heard it though, looking you up and down.

“How cruel the world can be to a perfectly innocent kid.” 

“Plenty worse could have happened to me,” you said, a frown forming on his face. His brow furrowed, eyes searching yours.

“And what exactly does that mean?” he asked, his jaw clenching. You shrugged, gaze back on a few waves that peaked up and sloshed back down. “Y/N.”

“It means in retrospect for what did happen to me, much worse things could have. It’s not that big a deal.” 

“Your birth parents abandoned you in the forest during fucking bear season. They admitted-”

“Nothing happened.” He audibly growled, clenching his fists on the railing. “It’s fine.”

“No,” he said, taking you by both your arms and leaning down, face hard. “No, none of it was fine. You were hurt and abused and you will not brush this under the rug. You are not alright. My Y/N is fighter. She’s a ball of spitfire and doesn’t back down from a fight. Even on her worst days, she’s got a spark in her. Don’t lose that, tall munchkin. Don’t.”

“I’m done fighting, Jensen. I give up. I don’t care anymore. I just don’t care.”

“Care about what?” he asked quietly.

“Anything. Just get me through high school and then I’ll move to the middle of nowhere where no one will have to remember I ever exist.” He dropped his head, breathing deeply. “Jensen, it’s fine-”

“Don’t…” he trailed off, his fingertips digging into your biceps ever so slightly. He slowly raised his head, his face somber. “Honey…you may never trust me again or believe me again and I shouldn’t say this but I get it. I fucking get why you might never trust anyone to be a parent to you ever again. But Y/N, I can never forget your exist. You’re one of my reasons for living and when you talk like that you scare me. Shit, you have no idea how much it scares me to know you hurt so much and I can’t fix it. You don’t know what I’d give for that version of you at the park who hated my guts right now. She was fighting. I need you to keep fighting. Don’t give up on me yet because I sure as shit will never give up on you, even when you do.”

You glanced down, nodding a few times. You felt him straighten and clear his throat, his hands rubbing gently up and down your arms.

“You know what’s sad? You’re the first person in my life that ever loved me,” you said, gaze fixated on the tile floor beneath you. “I treat you like shit and now I don’t even know how to feel anything anymore. I don’t understand at all how someone like you could love someone like me.”

“It is sad,” he said quietly, stroking his thumb over your cheek. “You deserved better. You deserved love long before now. But I will gladly be the first person to love you. Dads are like that.”

“Jensen,” you sighed, his hand dropping to under your jaw. You glanced up, a sad smile on his face.

“I know. Like I said, Dee and I will be whatever you need us to be. Parents. Friends. We can simply be a safe place for you. But whatever you decide, you don’t get to decide what you are to me, understand?” He rubbed your arms when you just stared at him. “Okay?”

“W-What am I to you?” you whispered. He tilted his head, sighing softly.

“Oh, you know, baby girl.” He pulled you into a hug, a tight embrace where you found yourself burrowing into his chest, clinging to his t-shirt. “I know it hurts and it’s so much easier not to feel it. I know. But I’m here. Mom’s here. You don’t have to face it alone. You’ll never be alone again.”

“I can’t…” you mumbled, breathing deeply, large hands holding you close. “You don’t understand how this feels. No one wants me. No one. It doesn’t matter how many times you say it, I just…I can’t believe you Jensen. It’ll kill me when you hurt me too.”

“What’s my job?” he whispered before kissing the top of your head. “What’d I tell you on that freezing cold road back in December in the rain? What’d I tell you my job is?”

You squeezed his shirt so hard you felt it straining, his hand running up and down your back. “Come on, kiddo. What’s my job?”

“Protect,” you whispered.

“That’s right,” he said, letting out a heavy sigh. “I haven’t done a very good job of that so far but it is my job. That’s what dads do. So let me do my job and you…you be as brave and strong as I know you are and give me a chance. Give me a chance to prove I love you, to know you are loved by this whole family and that…that…”

You glanced up, his face scrunched up, eyes opening as he sensed your gaze. He tucked your hair behind your ear, shoulders sagging.

“That what, Jensen?” you asked. He looked over your head, a sad little smile growing on his face.

“That I didn’t betray you. That every day you have been gone has been the darkest moment of my life. I need my daughter back.” 

“I don’t know if I can do that. I’m sorry,” you said. You slipped past him, feeling his gaze on your back. You swallowed, looking down. “I just don’t know if I can ever care about you again. Please don’t hate me for that.”

“I could never hate you, tall munchkin.” You felt a hand on your back, your head lifting but you didn’t turn. “All I’m asking for is one more chance. I’m asking you to try one more time for me. Try to give us a chance.”

“I’m sorry, Jensen. I don’t think I can.”

You went inside before he could say a word but you felt his response when he dropped his hand.

You were breaking his heart. And the worst part, the scary part, was you felt nothing about doing so.

Twelve Hours Later

“I’m sorry, what was that word?” asked Danneel. You picked at a stray thread on a pillow in the family room. You didn’t completely understand why you were having this “emergency” session or whatever it was at home but you guessed it had something to do with that it was Sunday and just about every adult in your life was staring at you like you had three heads.

“It’s called Alexithymia. It’s a condition that can happen for a variety of reasons. In Y/N’s case, PTSD is causing it,” said your therapist. You’d spent the better part of the morning getting reacquainted with him on your own, with Dee, Jensen, all three of you together. You’d barely gotten more than two hours of sleep and honestly couldn’t give a crap about anything this guy said.

“But Y/N was diagnosed with PTSD before and didn't have this condition,” said Jensen. That peaked your attention, your finger raising. Jensen and Danneel shared a look from the far end of the couch, your therapist sighing. 

“I don’t have PTSD, thank you very much.” Jensen scoffed. “If I had it, you would have had to tell me, dumbass.”

“It was not an official diagnosis previously but that’s irrelevant,” said the therapist. “The trauma Y/N endured last night and during the period she was removed from your home, even the removal from your home triggered-“

“It wasn’t fucking trauma and I wasn’t fucking triggered,” you snapped. “I am tired. I am just fucking tired from working so much and dealing with so much bullshit. I had two hours of sleep last night so of course I’m having a bad day. On a normal day, I’m fine.”

“What is this condition?” asked Dee, ignoring you. You rolled your eyes and would have simply left the room if not for Cole standing near the exit like a damn security guard. Apparently you weren’t being reasonable enough for them when you told them to take their therapist visit and shove it up their asses.

“It’s when someone has a hard time understanding the emotions they’re feeling or rather feeling or displaying an emotion at all. In Y/N’s case, based on what I’ve seen this morning, she’s primarily having a difficult time feeling her emotions.”

You flipped him off. “Does it feel like I’m having a hard time understanding my emotions?”

“Do I look like a fucking idiot?” His comment was strange for him. He never swore and was always level headed. “That’s a perfect example. Y/N knows I don’t swear yet there was zero emotion on her face whereas the rest of you were hiding your reactions. Y/N is a very smart girl who is very afraid of getting labeled with something because deep down she fears it makes her unlovable. And that we know for a fact from our previous sessions.”

You crossed your arms and sat back, glancing out the window, trying to calm down. Jensen cleared his throat. “So, uh, what does all this mean exactly?”

“It means you could put a puppy in front of her and she will react the same way as if you set the house on fire. She’s in pain, pain at a very fundamental level of her core. Her head right now is saying it can’t take more pain. It can’t deal with the pain,” said the therapist. “So her brain tells her I can keep you safe from the pain if you just don’t feel. You don’t have to feel those awful feelings if you don’t feel anything at all.”

“Yeah, cause that sounds like a normal reaction to have,” you mumbled. You turned towards Jensen and Danneel, their gaze shooting to you. “Do you seriously believe this crap? Jesus, I feel shit. Do I look like someone that doesn’t? This guy is so full of shit. He’s a fucking family doctor way out of his league and making crap up.”

Danneel bit her bottom lip, working it between her teeth worriedly. Jensen looked away.

“How do we help Y/N feel like herself again?” Jensen asked, ignoring your scoff.

“We work through the pain. She’s going to hate it. She’s going to hate all of us for a good while. We address the trauma endured and, eventually, her head will accept the emotions back. Most likely after something happens like a minor scare or a holiday or something where heightened emotion occurs. She protected herself in that conference room by retreating inward when she felt alone. We’ll make sure she knows she’s not.”

“Or…” you said, standing up. “Maybe this is a waste of time. Honestly? I couldn’t give a shit about what you think. People suck. That’s life. Just get my through the next six months until I’m eighteen and then it doesn’t matter what any of you want.”

You left and retreated to your room, quiet murmurs coming from down the hall. What was their problem? Just because you wanted to keep your distance you suddenly had a problem they were going to try and fix? 

“Fuck this.” You went to the closet and grabbed your duffel, throwing it over your shoulder.

But for some reason you couldn’t bring yourself to move. You tensed when a hand lifted it off your shoulder and set it back in the closet. You swallowed when Jensen sighed, looking down at you.

“Listen. I don’t agree with what he said.”

Your eyebrows shot up. “You don’t?”

“No. Because you’re pissed and I know my daughter. You don’t have whatever the thing is he said. Trauma? Sure. But you always have had that.” He put a hand on your head, ruffling your hair. “Don’t worry about it.”

“You aren’t going to make me like, see him extra or some crap?” He shook his head. “Really?”

“Really. We go back to once a week but nothing else. I know this isn’t something therapy will help with.” You frowned. Jensen shrugged, leaning back against the wall. “No, I realized last night the only way we fix this is with time. So we put in the effort and eventually, that wall will come down. I can wait.”

“Uh, thanks,” you said, rubbing your arm. “I’m really surprised you’re not siding with the doctor.”

“Tall munchkin.” You hated how those two words made your heart squeeze. You bit the inside of your cheek as he sighed. “He is an excellent family doctor but you had a point. He doesn’t know trauma. We’ll find someone better suited to help you. He’s going off a text book definition right now. I damn well know you feel things, you just don’t want to care about us right now. You’re still in shock, just like the rest of us. Let me and Dee figure out the therapist and you just…”

“Just what?” you mumbled. He titled his head, smiling sadly.

“Just be a fucking kid. Go play with the little kids. Spend the summer hanging out with your old friends because news flash, those girls miss you. Trust me, they text us at least once a week asking if we’ve heard from you cause apparently you’re radio silent when they reach out.”

You glanced down before taking a seat at the end of the bed. “I don’t want to be the girl they pity so they let me hang out with them.”

“Y/N,” he chided, sitting next to you. “I know you didn’t know them for very long but I thought those girls were your friends. I didn’t realize they treated you-”

“They didn’t,” you interjected. You rubbed your palm with your thumb, closing your eyes. “I just worried…I worried they didn’t actually like me and felt sorry for me. I’ve always been scared of getting close to anyone so it didn’t hurt when they fucked me over.”

You pressed your thumb in harder when you felt your skin prickle. Your face scrunched up, Jensen shifting beside you.

“I realize now that my birth parents weren’t all that much better than some of my fosters. I just always thought they were strict. Firm but it came from a good place. I was a good kid, after all. Even after I thought they were gone I was still good like they taught me to be.” You grabbed your thighs, gripping them both hard. “They taught me to be obedient and afraid of messing up. I needed to be perfect. Always fucking perfect even when I thought they were dead. I had to be perfect for them. Perfect grades. Well-behaved. I was perfect and they still didn’t want me.”

You turned to Jensen, green guarded eyes carefully looking back. “Jensen, I think you’re a good person and Dee too. But I don’t know how to be a kid. I don’t know how to not think everyone hates me because everyone always has. I’m seventeen years old. I’m too broken to be fixed. We’re better off just saving everyone the trouble and-”

“Can we stop with the bullshit?” You stopped mid sentence, jaw hung open. Meanwhile Jensen shook his head in annoyance. “You ain’t perfect and you never have been. You’ve got a mouth and a stubborn streak and you have never in your life been afraid to give it right back to me. You know what that is? It’s called being a teenager. Broken? Here’s something for you perfect child, you’re grounded for letting those assholes keep winning.”

“What? I have work-”

“You can go to work but I’m having a serious discussion with your managers about the hours you’re keeping which is super illegal for a minor by the way,” he said as he stood, crossing his arms when you glared back. “Be pissed off all you want. I can work with pissed off.”

“I didn’t do anything!” you said, getting up when he started to leave. “Jensen!”

He turned around, his eyes narrowed. “You do not get to let these people have control over you anymore. Fuck every single one of them. You have no idea how amazing you are. How full of love and care you are. In places you don’t want to admit, you know this family loves you. You know your friends care about you, miss you. You aren’t going to sit in this room and wallow about how much life sucks.”

“Jensen, that’s not fair-”

“You promised me you’d try for me,” he said, your jaw snapping shut. “You do not need to succeed but you will always try your best and this girl? Miss I’m too broken? My daughter is better than that. You fail after you try? Fine. But you aren’t trying so you don’t get to quit on this family yet. Understand?”

“But…” He raised an eyebrow, waiting for you to continue. You looked around the room, your pulse quickening. “You can’t make me. Last night you said I didn’t have to…you said-”

“I know what I said.” He raised his chin, dread curling in your gut. “But you will try.”

“I don’t want any of you!” you shouted, clenching your hands into fists by your sides. “Why won’t you leave me the fuck alone!”

He looked you up and down, a steadiness to him that unnerved you, some of your anger fading. “You can give up on yourself if that’s what you want to do. But I never will.”

“Why do you even-”

“Because that is what dads do, Y/N. I know you don’t understand everything a dad is supposed to do. I get it. I will show you. Dee will show you what a mom does. We will show you.” He put his hands on his hips, your heart caught in your throat. “If you try for us, you don’t have to feel like this every second of every day. We can show you good days, just like we did before. You can have so many good days they’ll outnumber ones like this. But kid, I need you to give it a chance. Now go outside to where the kids are playing so they can welcome you home.”

You grumbled as you went past him, Jensen clearing his throat behind you. “What now?”

“I’d appreciate it if you spent the day with them. They were devastated when you left and-”

“I wouldn’t hurt them,” you snapped back at him. 

“Never said you would. You were always amazing with them. I just hope when you go out there you might finally understand that there are people in this world that love you unconditionally. Kids can’t lie about that crap and those three have begged for their big sister to come back every day. So go make their fucking year and maybe they’ll help you not feel so damn shitty for a little while.”

You swallowed when he went past you and turned the corner.

“I’ll try to try,” you whispered. 

You heard him hum and part of you hoped it’d really be that simple.

Late Evening

You winced when you sat down on a counter stool after a late shower. You weren’t old but damn, you had more than a few bruises and scrapes after playing outside with the kids all day.

And it’d been the best day you’d had in a long time.

“Don’t pick at that,” said Dee, coming up from the small basement area with a bottle of wine in hand. You moved your hand away from your knee cap, Dee setting the bottle down. “You put some medicine on your scrapes?”

“Yes,” you said, getting up and going to the cabinet with the first aid kit. She hummed behind you, popping open the bottle as you put a few dabs of antiseptic and bandaids on. “Where’s Jensen?”

“A friend from when he was a kid is in town. They’re getting a quick drink. He should be home in an hour or so,” she said. 

“I didn’t say I cared.” She inhaled sharply, pouring her drink with a clenched jaw. “I just think it’s funny. You wanted me back so bad and he’s gone after I’ve been here a day? Yeah, I’m feeling all the love over here.”

“Y/N.” She set the bottle down. Hard. She leaned back, gripping the edge of the counter. With a shake of her head, she sighed. “He hasn’t seen this friend in person in nearly a decade and it’ll probably be another before he sees him again. You want to be pissed at someone? Be pissed at me. I’m the one that told him to go.”

“Of course you did.” She looked up, narrowing her eyes. “Oh come on, Danneel. We both know you never loved me. The kids, yeah. Jensen, maybe. But you? You didn’t want me here. He’s the one always reaching out. It’s never you. He’s not home so we don’t have to pretend right now, alright?”

She stood up straight, taking a long sip from her glass with closed eyes. 

“Yeah, drink away the problem. That always worked for so many of my other foster moms.” She set the glass down, slowly peeling open her eyes to reveal something…off. It was a look you didn’t recognize.

“I’m sorry I didn’t love you instantly like he did. I’m sorry Jensen was smitten the second you walked in that door and it took me a few days to fall in love with you. I’m sorry we couldn’t protect you and that we failed you. But you don’t have the right to be mean-”

“I have every right to be whatever the fuck I want,” you snapped. Her bottom lip wobbled, a sharp pang ripping through your gut you tried to ignore. “You’re sad? Boo hoo. Get over it. I told him more than once already. I don’t want this. I don’t want you. You will never be my parent and when I’m eighteen, I really am gone. So suck it up and stop crying because I really do not care.”

She wrinkled her nose and looked away, tears filling her eyes. After a beat, she took a step back and quietly made her way to her room, closing the door behind her. You sighed, sliding off the counter stool to head towards your room when you froze. 

Jensen was standing by the hallway, staring at you, every feature of his face etched with anger.

“I-”

“Don’t.” He walked past you, headed straight for his bedroom.

“She-” Jensen spun on his heels, eyes dark as he bounded across the room in four quick steps to stare you down. 

“Go to your room. We are going to have a very serious discussion about what I just heard.” 

“I-”

“Room. Now,” he growled. You shrunk away and went quickly to your bedroom, heart in your throat.

Why had you said that? Why the fuck had you said that shit to Dee? Your hands shook as you rushed to your closet. You’d been right all along. Something was wrong with you. No wonder no one wanted you. You were nasty and cruel and god, you had to get out of here and let these people live in peace.

You grabbed your duffel and quietly slipped on a pair of sneakers before you were out the garage door without a sound. 

One Hour Later

You weren’t far outside of the neighborhood when you heard a car horn blare. You spun around, swallowing when a black SUV sped up close to you, coming to a hard stop in the road. Jensen got out of the car, storming around the front with a fury you’d only seen once before. 

Oh god, he was going to fucking kill you.

“Get in the fucking car!” he shouted. You were frozen where you stood, Jensen ripping the duffel away and taking your arm with his other hand. He tossed the bag in the backseat before giving you a look to do what he said or else. Silently you got inside, Jensen slamming the door shut. 

You swallowed when you tried the door and realized he had the childproofing on. Fuck, he never did that before when it was only you in the car. He didn’t want you to run away. Fuck, fuck, fuck. 

He was behind the wheel fast, putting the car in drive. He didn’t head home though. No, he got on the highway and drove out west, out towards the brewery. Out where it was quiet this time of night. The brewery would be closed, no one around. 

You were shaking like a leaf when he pulled up in front of the old house on the property. He was quiet, much slower to walk around the car this time. You wouldn’t look at him when he opened the door, taking your arm again. He didn’t say anything as he walked you up the steps into the dark house. He flipped a switch on the wall, a dim hall light and a few others turning on. At the back of the house was an old kitchen, a few wooden chairs sat at a nearby table.

“Sit.” He let go of you, walking to the far side of the room. This was your one and only chance. You bolted out of the room, ripping open the back door. “Y/N!”

You yelped when arms caught you before you could even get off the back porch. Fuck, you thought he wouldn’t be that fast. But you still tried to get free, aware of someone shouting your name over and over.

“Y/N!” Jensen shouted, shaking you once. You blinked away wet tears as you stared up at him, pulse racing as you kept trying to get your wrists out of his steel grip. “Kiddo, stop. What is going on with you?”

“Just fucking do it already,” you breathed out with as much defiance as you could muster which wasn’t a whole lot. Your heart hurt, your body was coming off an adrenaline high and he was too fucking strong. It was all too fucking much.

“Tall munchkin, what are you talking about?” he asked. You jerked on your hands and fresh tears spilled over.

“Just hurt me already. That’s why you brought me out here, isn’t it? So get it over with.”

His face fell so fast you’d have sworn you told him someone had died. He closed his eyes as his grip on you eased, hands moving to your cheeks. He closed his eyes for a long beat, opening them slowly, wiping away your tears. “Oh, baby girl. Do you really think I could ever do that to you?”

You glanced away, body trembling as you fought back the wracking sobs your lungs that were desperate to escape. He kissed the top of your head, murmuring something you couldn’t make out over the pounding in your ears.

“What?” you whispered, eyes fixated on a tree a ways off in the darkness.

“I said it’s okay. I got you.” You glanced up at him, all the rage from before gone, a deep sadness replacing it. He smiled, thumbing away more tears that silently fell. “I’m sorry. I promised I’d keep you safe and I didn’t. You can hate me if that makes you feel better. God knows I hate myself.”

A single crackling heap of air that sounded like a pained cry left your lips, your hands so tight on his wrists you’d leave marks. “Y/N. I’m sorry for making you come back. We should have realized how much we hurt you. We understand if you can’t forgive us…can’t stand us.”

He closed his eyes, breathing hard a few beats. “I will not force you to stay with people you can’t stand. If you want…we can find you a new family…”

Finally he opened his eyes, wet green eyes meeting your own. “I need you to be okay and you’re not with us. I understand. It’s okay. We’ll find you somewhere you can be okay.”

“You’re getting rid of me?” you breathed out, his head shaking. “Yes, you are.”

“Look at yourself,” he said, dropping his hands, your own releasing him when he stepped back. He shrugged, shaking his head. “I was supposed to make your life better. I was supposed to protect you. I was supposed to take away the pain, not give you more. You deserve a better father than me.”

“Jensen-”

“You’re still scared of me!” He shouted, waving his hand up and down, wiping off his face with the back of his hand. “You thought I’d hit you? After all this time you still don’t trust me and I don’t blame you. I’m a fuck up that will keep fucking this up. I know you want a family but it doesn’t have to be us. I will find you better, somewhere you can forget about all of the bad homes. You can forget about us. You don’t have to hurt anymore.”

You shook your head, Jensen scoffing, looking over your head. “You ran away again. You keep telling Dee and I how much you don’t want this. We can’t keep doing this every day, Y/N. I won’t force you to be part of a family you don’t want. I shouldn’t have told you that you have to try. I’m sorry.”

You clenched your fists by your sides, blinking through tears that wouldn’t stop, trying to breath through your stuffed up nose and failing. “Y/N, I’m sorry-”

“Stop saying that!” You flung your arms out and pushed him back a step, hands hitting a solid wall of his chest.

“Y/N, you don’t want us-” You pushed him again, Jensen not moving this time. “Y/N! Stop-”

You turned and walked away, hands on your head as you bounded down the back steps. 

“Y/N!” You spun around, Jensen a few feet behind you in the grassy yard, your heart breathing hard. “Y/N-”

“I LOVE YOU, YOU FUCKING MORON!” you screamed. He froze, face blank a moment as you looked up to the dark night sky. “I told the DA and the state I wouldn’t sue for all their fuck ups if when you decided to adopt me, the process would happen same day, no waiting. I picked you. I want you.”

“W-why didn’t you tell us? Why didn’t Cole?” he asked. You put your back to him, eyes watching the stars above.

“Because I feel like I got stabbed in the heart yesterday and I’ll be bleeding out for the rest of my life. I don’t want adoption unless you want me.” You shuddered when fresh tears started, your throat feeling raw from the choked back sobs.

“But…you know we want you. You know that.” You nodded, feeling him behind you. “If you want us and we want you, what the fuck are we doing out here?”

“This might surprise you but I’m pretty fucked up,” you joked. You lowered your head, wrapping your arms around yourself in the cool night air. “No one’s ever loved me before. I’m so goddamn scared of being loved.”

“Why?” he asked quietly.

“Because what if you change your mind like all the others. There’s no more room inside of me for that and especially not from you.”

“What makes me so special?” he breathed out, resting his hands on your shoulders, tucking your head under his chin. 

“I don’t know. I just know that it hurt a hell of a lot more to think you gave me back than to know my birth parents gave me up and I don’t fucking understand why. I’m so mean to you and Dee because if you hurt me like that for real, it’ll kill me. I want you but I’m so scared of that pain coming back. You are the ones that deserve better, not me.”

“And we screwed up so you don’t trust us the way you need to in order to get rid of that fear,” he said. You shook your head, shrugging away from him.

“Jensen,” you said, facing him, the breeze in the air drying your salty tear streaks against your cheeks. “I don’t blame you for not knowing the impossible. That case worker woman was vile. She fucked with me my whole time in foster care. I do not blame you and I hate that you hate yourself for what she did.”

“It doesn’t matter. My job is to protect you and I didn’t. It’s that simple.” You tilted your head, frowning at him. “If we’d stopped her that day we could have been there for you when you found out about her and your birth parents. You wouldn’t feel so alone right now.”

“Yes I would and you know it. Finding out about my birth parents was always going to make me question you and Dee and everything. That kind of pain…” Your gaze went down to your feet for a moment, trailing up to his face eventually. “I was never going to outrun it. It’s something I have to go through alone. You can help but that pain is mine and mine alone to fight through.”

“You shouldn’t ever know that level of pain. No one should,” he said softly. You nodded, the air quiet and still. “I need to let you be in pain I think is what you’re telling me.”

“I’m not looking forward to it either,” you said, closing your eyes. “I got so good at bottling crap up and it’s festering in there. I’ve been trying so hard to stay numb to it all.”

“That’s clearly been working out,” he teased, his foot steps crunching against the dry grass. Heavy arms wrapped around your back, your head dropping to his chest. “Last night you were in shock.”

“I know.”

“I think you have to let yourself feel it all, kiddo. You have to take it and mourn and let the pain in.” You shook your head, his hand dipping under your chin. You swallowed and met his gaze, his green eyes gentle. “You’re scared of being loved? Then let me love you through this. Let me prove that I love all those dark, ugly corners inside of you that you can’t stand. Let me show you I love the worst parts of you as much as the best. You can’t live with this fear and pain forever. So you fight through it and I’ll be by your side while you do. Can we try that?”

“Okay,” you whispered. You shuddered, his hand rubbing up and down your back. “We have a problem.”

“What?” he asked, pressure forming behind your eyes. You screwed your eyes shut to try and stop the wetness but it was coming, your skin prickled up, nerves tingling as the pit your stomach opened up.

“You said nice things and I don’t think I can wait until we get home to have a breakdown,” you whispered, a pang of hurt rippling across your chest. You grimaced, Jensen bending down and picking you up, arms and legs wrapping around him as you clung tight. You trembled, panic crawling through your veins. 

They don’t love you. They don’t love you. They don’t love you. No one’s ever loved you. 

“Hey, hey,” he said as you sat down inside on the floor of the kitchen against one of the walls. “Breathe for me, tall munchkin. Breathe.”

“W-why didn’t they want me?” you croaked. A large hand tucked you into the crook of his neck, his arms tight across your back and holding you to him. “Why’d they do that to me?”

“I don’t know, baby girl,” he said. You started babbling questions you knew he couldn’t answer, all the while he kept a lock tight grip to keep you close. It was hours later when the tears were long gone and your body exhausted when you finally stopped.

“Jensen,” you mumbled, wearily opening your eyes and met with the mess of his neck and shirt you’d made.

“Yes, sweetheart?” he whispered, head tilted against yours. 

“Why do you love me?” you barely got out, throat like sandpaper. He was quiet, chest rising and falling slowly underneath you.

“Those people may have made you but you’re my daughter and I need no reason to love my daughter. All I know is I love her and I will for the rest of eternity so she better get fucking used to it.”

You turned your head up, Jensen lifting his with a tired smile. “How we doing, kiddo?”

“You kept your promise,” you whispered. “About protecting me. Trust me.”

“Okay, kiddo,” he said, your head falling back to his shoulder. “You want to go home?”

You nodded, Jensen grunting as he got his legs underneath himself and managed to stand with you still around him. You hummed your impressment, Jensen chuckling as he walked through the house and hit the switch on the way out.

“We’ll do this as many times as we need to, okay?” You closed your eyes and hummed again. “I’m sorry for scaring you earlier. I just didn’t want you to run off on me before we could talk.”

“S’okay,” you murmured. “Probably a good call.”

“Let’s get you home, sweetie.”

Thirty minutes later Jensen was carrying you inside, kicking off his shoes and pulling yours off your feet before turning the alarm on and turning off the downstairs lights. He didn’t veer left towards your room though. Instead he carried you into his room where Danneel sat in bed with a book and her phone. You wearily raised your head. It was two in the morning. Why wasn’t she asleep?

“M’sorry,” you got out, throat burning again, a wince crossing your face.

“I forgive you,” she said softly as she stood up, tucking your hair behind your ear as Jensen brought you to the bed. She kissed your forehead, sighing gently. “We can talk in the morning.”

“I love you,” you said when Jensen started to move. She smiled, running her hand over your head. 

“I love you too,” she said, nodding towards the bed. Jensen set you down in the middle, Danneel pulling the covers over top of you.

Your head had barely hit the pillow before you were out like a light.

You woke up to the sound of a pan clattering somewhere. You looked around the unfamiliar space, quickly registering where exactly you were. The sun was up and a quick glance at the clock showed it was just after seven.

You slowly got out of bed and used the bathroom before leaving their bedroom. Danneel was washing a pan in the sink while Jensen sipped on a cup of coffee and tried to get the twins to eat their breakfast.

“Morning,” you squeaked out, hand going to your throat. You rubbed it, Danneel frowning at you.

“What are you doing up?”

“I have school in thirty minutes,” you said, Jensen shoving a glass of water in front of you that you happily chugged.

“We called school. You finished your exams last week they said and Cole already got you excused these last two days,” said Danneel. “You’re on summer vacation.”

You sat down at the counter and closed your eyes, the sound of a plate set in front of you. You opened them again, Jensen’s plate now yours. He eyed for you to eat and you were honestly still too tired to argue. It hurt a bit to swallow but you got your eggs down by the time Jensen was rushing the kids off to school and daycare.

“Go take a shower and change,” said Danneel, taking your mostly empty plate away. 

“Dee.” You paused at the hallway to your room, hearing her stop working in the kitchen. 

“Jensen told me about last night. We don’t have to rehash it.” You nodded, putting a hand on the wall. “We’d like to take you on a day trip today if that’s okay with you.”

“Yeah, that’s fine. Where?” you asked.

“Galveston? Have you ever been?” You shook your head. “You’ve never seen the ocean?”

“We only went on one trip when I was a kid and that’s when my birth parents tried to abandon me in the woods.” You shrugged. “Maybe we should go in a few days after JJ graduates kindergarten.”

She smiled and shook her head. “We take lots of trips. We were supposed to go to Canada on your spring break, do you remember?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, we’ll go on that one in July when Jensen goes back to work. But today is a trip for us three, okay? The little ones can come another time.”

“Don’t they need-”

“They are taken care of. Now go wash up and pack a bag. We won’t be home until late.”

“What do I bring to the beach?” you asked. She smiled. 

“Just go wash up. I’ll pack your things. Don’t worry.”

That Evening

You tilted your head back with a smile, enjoying the warm setting sun on your face as you leaned against the railing of the pier. The cool ocean breeze was a nice contrast to the last traces of heat in the day. 

“I didn’t know teenagers were capable of spending the day with their parents for a day without combusting, let alone do it with a smile,” said Jensen beside you. You stuck out your tongue at him, Jensen throwing an arm over your cold shoulders. “Warm enough?”

“I’m a little chilly but I don’t want to leave yet,” you said. 

“I will be right back then. Five minutes.” He left your side and headed towards a stand nearby, Danneel looping her arm through yours as she watched the waves with you. 

“Did you have a good day?” she asked. 

“Yeah.” You took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “But this isn’t real life. It’s a vacation. I can’t have your attention all the time.”

“Sweetie, you’re seventeen. I seriously doubt you want our attention all the time.” 

“Good point,” you said. “But you and Jensen can’t focus on me. It’s not fair to the little guys.”

“Y/N. Jensen and I are the parents, not you. You will never be a parent to your siblings, understand? You just…be a big sister and you leave the making sure the kids are alright to me and Jay.”

“I’m not used to this. Being cared for. Getting a whole day for me,” you said, smiling when you saw a dolphin far out jump over the water.

“You’ll get used to it. This is just the start.” You nodded when she rested her head on your shoulder. “Someday you’ll struggle to remember what it was like not feeling loved. Just give us time to make it feel normal.”

“I just…feel like it’s a lot for just me. I didn’t do anything to deserve it.”

“Love isn’t a barter system. You just do things for the people you love because you love them. Like Jensen buying you an overpriced sweatshirt so you won’t be cold.” You smirked, her hand rubbing up and down your bare arm. “Trust me?”

“Okay,” you whispered, head turning when Jensen approached with a bright royal blue hoodie.

“Alright so I went with blue since I don’t think our daughter is a highlighter pink kind of girl.” You raised your eyebrows, Jensen chuckling as he tugged it on over your head. “Are you about to tell me I misread that?”

“Uh no, I want the blue over the pink for sure,” you said, tugging it down as he fixed the strings. “I just…you said our daughter.”

“I did. Daughter, daughter, daughter, daughter, daughter,” he said, kissing your forehead when you blushed. “I don’t know what to do with her, Dee. She clearly hates being called daughter.”

“Maybe we just keep saying it so our daughter gets used to it?” she asked, wrapping her arm around your waist.

“I think we definitely should for our daughter. What does our daughter think about that, daughter?” said Jensen with a big stupid smile. 

“Jesus christ,” you said, rolling your eyes as you bit the inside of your cheek. His eyes lit up though, finger pointing at your face. “What?”

“Daughter smiled,” he grinned.

“I did not-”

“Don’t lie, daughter,” said Dee, Jensen putting you in a headlock when you groaned. “Aw, she’s annoyed with us.”

“Just like a normal family,” he said. You groaned again. “Come on, let’s go find some ice cream around here.”

“There’s a place back that way with a red and white awning,” said a voice in passing. You turned your head to find a guy about your age standing there, a couple guys that looked like his friends walking on ahead of him.

“Well thank you,” said Jensen, trying to walk away with you but you were still looking at this guy with short, fluffy black hair and a UT Austin hoodie.

“Hi,” he said with a smile as you realized he’d been talking to you the whole time. 

“Hi,” you said, pushing Jensen’s arm off of you, taking a step closer to him. “Do you go to Austin?”

He glanced down and laughed. “Oh no. I’m going into my senior year of high school. I did a college tour over there last month. They’re my first choice.”

“Same. I want to do their architecture program if I can get in,” you said, the guys eyes lighting up even more.

“Small world. I’m applying for architecture too,” he said, the guys friends coming back, someone whispering something in his ear that had him trying to wave them off.

“Well hopefully we both get in,” you said, stepping closer and holding out your hand. “Can I have your phone?”

He fumbled with it in his pocket for a second before pulling it out. You texted yourself from his phone and handed it back, his shy smile growing by the second. “Text me sometime. We can vent about the application process.”

“S-sure,” he said, taking the phone back. You clasped your hands behind your back, not even a little upset about the weird little flip flops your stomach was doing. “I’ll see you around.”

“I hope so,” you said. “I’m Y/N.”

“TJ,” he said, walking backwards with that stupid grin.

“See you around campus, TJ.”

“You too, Y/N,” he said as you spun around, giving him a little wave behind your back. You walked past Jensen and Dee, humming to yourself.

“Did you see the way they were looking at each other?” whispered Dee.

“Yes,” mumbled Jensen.

“The way she lit up-”

“Yes.”

“Did that remind you of anyone in particular, Jensen?” she said, a smile in her voice.

“Yes,” he sighed. You glanced over your shoulder, raising your eyebrow at them. “She thinks you just met your soulmate.”

You laughed, shaking your head. “Yeah, right. Sure I did.”

“Jesus christ, she’s going to marry that fucking kid,” said Jensen. You rolled your eyes. “If you saw your face, you’d think so to.”

“He was hot, doesn’t mean anything,” you said, Dee smirking up at Jensen. “Guys.”

“Alright, alright. Let’s go find some ice cream.”

It was after midnight when you got home and into bed. The bridge of your nose was sunburnt and you were pretty sure you still smelled like the ocean despite a shower. But it was a good day.

“Hey,” said Jensen, knocking on the doorframe to your room as you climbed under the covers. “Need anything?”

“I’m good,” you said, Jensen setting a glass of water down on your nightstand. “Thanks.”

“You were in the sun a lot today. Drink that before you sleep,” he said, ruffling your hair. You closed your eyes and nodded, flashing them open when he moved away. 

“Why’d you and Dee tease me about that guy today?” you asked. He looked worried and you shook your head. “It’s okay. I know I’ve never talked about boys before with you guys but like, I’ve had a boyfriend before. For like a month but still.”

He smiled and sat on the edge of the bed, taking your hand in his, thumbing over the sleeve of your new hoodie. “Because for a solid minute there, honey, you weren’t just happy. You were…lighter. We’ve never seen you like that before. You were so forward with him and flirting and that is what I want you to feel with your partner everyday when you are ready for that. It’s very hard to explain that it seemed different than you just thinking a guy was hot. Does that make sense?”

You nodded, putting your free hand on your stomach. “I had butterflies but I’ve had those before. I just…it’s really hard to believe in the idea of soulmates. I want to, you know? The idea that there’s someone out there that’s yours and will love you forever is nice but…I find it hard to believe some guy could ever love me. I mean, you know me. What boy will put up with me questioning them if they love me? I’ll be one of those weird clingy girls and guys don’t like that.”

“Your other half will be your safe place and will love to be that for you. He will love to tell you how much he loves you and he will be so good at it, you won’t doubt him. That is the man you will marry. You will never settle for any other man than one that loves you and you will know, tall munchkin. You’ll know who he is when you meet him.”

“How do you know, though?” You asked. Jensen chuckled.

“I’m going to let you figure that one out for yourself when you’re older,” he said, leaning in. “But do text that boy first when you’re ready. If he’s anything like me, he’ls going to need you to make the first move.”

“You think I’m that brave?” you scoffed. “Me?”

“Kid, you literally pushed me away to go talk to some random boy. I don’t know what that was but that boy is meant to be somebody in your life,” he said, giving your hand a squeeze. “Do me a favor though. Focus on you first for awhile, not boyfriends. Deal?”

“Deal.” He got up, pausing when he watched you part your lips.

“Yeah, kiddo?” 

“Thanks, for today. I’ve never built a sandcastle or been on a jet ski or eaten seafood or just…had a day like that.” 

“You’ll have more like it, promise. Get some sleep now.” 

“I…” you said before he could leave, Jensen cocking his head down. “There’s a part of me that’s still scared, that I don’t fit here. I know I shouldn’t but I might…I might still…I don’t want to be a brat again. I don’t. But I’m scared I’ll wake up tomorrow and you'll change your mind.”

“Y/N.” He looked down, tucking your hair behind your ear. “Dee and I called Cole this morning to start the process for you to be adopted. By the end of the week we should be in front of a judge and make it official.”

“You want to…” He nodded. “Why now?”

“We always wanted you. The paperwork has been filled out since the first day we met you.” Your eyes went wide, Jensen sighing. “We wanted adoption to be the last step after you knew we loved you and we knew you loved us. It wasn’t supposed to be a bandaid to get you there. We know you’re shaky still because of your birth parents and there’s fresh scars there we have to work through. But I know you. I know you want us and we want you. So let’s make you ours and we’ll work on healing those new scars.”

“I-I’m getting adopted this week?” you asked, Jensen smiling. 

“JJ graduates on Wednesday and we’re having a party for her afterwards. Is Friday too far away?” You shook your head. “We’ll go to the store tomorrow, find you a dress or whatever you want to wear for it.”

“Okay,” you whispered. He ran his hand over your head, leaning down to kiss the top of it. You pressed your hands to your eyes, trying to stop the pressure behind them trying to build. 

“You do want this, don’t you?” he asked. You nodded, feeling the air shift. Your hands were gently pulled away, Jensen kneeling before you. “Hey. You never have to hide your tears from me.”

“It just doesn’t feel real. Good things don’t happen to me.” He held your hands, trying to hide his worry. “Are you really sure?”

“We lost you once. We’re not losing you again. End of story.” You closed your eyes, smiling as he pulled you into a hug. “And to be clear, you keep calling me and Dee whatever you want to. You do not have to call us mom and dad. Ever. Okay?”

“You worry too much,” you whispered, hugging him hard. He let out a huff, chuckling through it. “I wish I was born here.”

“Me too. I would have loved to teach you so much.” You laughed, leaning back to catch his curious eyes. 

“There’s still things you can…like maybe tomorrow you can show me how to ride a bike?” you asked. His eyes lit up at that information. “I know I should know by now but no one…I realized the assholes didn’t teach me a lot-”

“We will teach you everything you want to know,” he said, getting to his feet and kissing your forehead. “Starting with the bike tomorrow. Now drink your water and I want you to sleep in tomorrow. You haven’t had a good night’s sleep in months.”

“Jensen,” you said as you scooted back against the pillows and he grabbed your blanket from the chair in the corner to toss over you. “I swear I’ll never run away again. I’m sorry. You and Dee need to have a good night’s sleep too.”

“I trust you, tall munchkin.” He pointed at the glass and you took a big chug, Jensen humming. “Come get us if you need anything.”

“Goodnight,” you said, setting the glass aside and laying down. 

“Goodnight, sweetheart.”

Friday Night

Jensen stood up from his seat around the table on the back porch where most of the family was congregated. “Alright. I’m going to go get the firepit started. Y/N, come watch and learn.”

You shoveled down the rest of your cake and wiped off your hands as you trotted down the stairs after him. “Are you sure this is about the firepit and not giving me some kind of present? Cause you’ve been trying to get me alone for like, an hour.”

“We already got you presents. The new bike for my incredible prodigy-”

“Am I prodigy if we spent thirty minutes watching youtube videos first?” He ignored you, tossing his arm over your shoulder as you walked across the grass towards the back patio deck in the corner.

“You already got your presents for the day,” he said.

“Yeah, stuff I didn’t ask for in the first place. Having…this is more than enough,” you said, gesturing towards him and back at the house.

“I know. It actually makes it incredibly difficult to find gifts for you,” he teased, letting you go when you got to the pit. He flicked the pocket of your galveston hoodie you wore, your head darting down at the thwacking sound. “Hm. Sound like something’s in there.”

“Did you just reverse pick-pocket me?” you said, reaching inside and pulling out an envelope.

“Why don’t you go take a seat and read that while I get the fire going?” he said, pointing to a far off chair. You raised and eyebrow but left him, instead choosing to hop up on top of the railing. “Y/N.”

“Yeah?” you asked, tearing it open.

“There’s some things in there that are different now but the message is the same. Remember that.” 

“Okay…” you said, taking out the sheets, pausing when you saw the date in the top corner. “This is from the first day I was ever here, last December.”

“I might have written that awhile ago.” You stared at him, Jensen tilting his head. “You read that and we never have to talk about it again and when you’re ready, we’ll invite everybody down here, alright?”

“What is this?” you asked, spotting an 18 on the envelope.

“I…write letters to my children…for their big life events…some I’ve already written, some I haven’t yet. That was supposed to be your letter for your eighteenth birthday. I always thought with how long adoption takes…it’d be around that time when we had been able to do that for you. Today felt fitting for it.” He put his back to you and started to fiddle with a switch on the stone wall, flames coming up from the gas fire pit. He simply stood there, watching it, ignoring your stares.

After a moment you straightened out the papers and started to read.

Hi kiddo. So today’s your first day here. It’s getting pretty late. I just checked and you’re passed out in your room. I’m taking that as a good sign. I know today was stressful for you, stressful for all of us. It certainly hasn’t turned out like I expected. I never expected you to be any sort of way really. But you kind of broke my heart earlier. It’s alright. It’s part of being a dad. It’s nothing you even did. I see how afraid you are, how closed off you are. You told me not to bother with you.

Y/N, you’re out of your fucking mind if you think for one second I’m not going to fight every single day to prove you wrong. You are worth a family, sweetie. You are so worth it. Dee and I talked about you quite a bit after you went to bed. We’re going to adopt the shit out of you someday. Hopefully by the time you get this, we already have or at least you know we’re going to. 

I don’t need that piece of paper to know how I feel. We’ll get it someday, I promise you that. But I don’t need it. I don’t need a piece of paper to call you my daughter.

I know you’re probably thinking, Jensen, you’re nuts. You barely knew me for five hours! How did you know you wanted to adopt me?

Well, Y/N, here’s the thing. Before I opened that front door today, I didn’t. I wanted desperately for you to be part of this family. I certainly never expected to know right away. You know, I’ve only known I loved someone unconditionally like that three other times in my life. You may know them as your siblings. Even with Dee, I fell hard for her but not so fast. 

It scares the shit out of me to be honest. You’ll learn in time that while I’m big and tall and strong, I’m a wimp when it comes to this stuff. I got a lot of friends, but there’s only a few I let in close like that. I get scared of getting hurt too. I’m shy and quiet unless I feel comfortable around whoever I’m with. I force myself to not be like that around people sometimes but I don’t have to force a thing with you. So yeah, it’s only been a little while. I know we got a lot ahead of us to deal with. 

I know I love you too, kiddo. I’m not your birth dad. I didn’t teach you to ride a bike or swing a baseball bat or take you to your first day of school. 

But you’re my daughter and I’ll never give a damn that we don’t share blood or the fact I didn’t make you. You’re ours and we’re yours and no one will ever tell me otherwise. 

I’ll always be your dad, no matter how big you get. You lost a lot of opportunities to be a kid. I know that and I wish I could give them back. But I’ll do what I can. You can be embarrassed of me or think I’m a dork. That’s okay. I want to give you as much as possible. 

Just because you’re growing up doesn’t mean any of that will ever stop either. I will still be dad and still ask you to let me know you got home safe when you’re my age so get used to it. I know it’ll only have been about a year. I know it won’t be perfect. I know we’ll have had hard days by now and we’ll keep having them.

But as long as you’re safe, as long as you’re happy, as long as you give us a chance, that’ll be more than enough for me. You’re strong, Y/N. I am proud of you for how amazing you’ve done in life all on your own. Maybe it seems stupid to you but I am proud. You were your own parent and I’m sorry. No one should have to raise themselves. But you did a damn good job of it. Let us take over from here. You rest and be a kid again. 

Allow yourself to feel loved again, honey. We won’t hurt you. We never will. 

By the time you see this, I hope you know all of this already. I hope none of this comes as a surprise. We love you. I love you. I think you know we’re different already. I saw it tonight when I told you I was going to prove you wrong. No one’s cared about you like that in a long time.

Your parents care. Cole cares. We care. There’s going to be even more people that come into your life that care about you. I’m so very honored to get to be one of them. It won’t be easy. But that’s okay. I will never stop showing you that you are worth every bit of love you get around here and beyond it. 

I love you.

Also, you snore a little and that’s so flippin’ adorable. 

I don’t know how to end this so welcome home, Y/N and Happy 18th Birthday, kiddo. 

Love,

Dad

You wiped off your face with your sleeve, a shaky breath escaping your lips. Carefully, you tucked the letter back into the envelope, holding it against your chest. 

“Why didn’t you give me this sooner?” you whispered. You heard the deck creak behind you.

“You wouldn’t have believed me.” You closed your eyes, chest tight. 

“Sunday night…you said you’d find me another family if that’s what I wanted. Even when you loved me all this time.” 

“When you love someone, really love them, all you want is for them to be happy. I’d do anything to make you happy, kiddo, even if it hurts me. That’s what parents do.”

You tucked the envelope into the kangaroo pocket of your hoodie, slowly wrapping your arms around yourself. 

“I don’t want you to feel bad about Sunday. We don’t have to talk about that letter ever again either. All I wanted to do was give you a reminder for when I’m not around that we love you so damn much.”

Your bottom lip wobbled as your eyes opened, glancing right to find him at your side. Warm green eyes met yours, his smile soft. He wiped your cheeks with the cuff of his shirt sleeve, turning your head when you tried to shy away. “Hey. Look at me.”

You looked up, soft fleece touching under your eyes and then dabbing over your wet lashes. You blinked a few times, swallowing thickly. All he did was smile though. “Why are you washing my face?”

“This isn’t the first time I’ve wiped away one of my kids tears and it won’t be the last.”

“But why me? I’m not a little kid,” you whispered. He cocked his head, swiping down your neck before cupping your cheek.

“Because you’ll always be my kid and dad’s take care of their kids. I’ll spend the rest of my life proving that to you. I promise.” You nodded, his hand dropping. “I’m sorry about the letter-”

“No.” You placed your hands over the pocket, the envelope crinkling. “I loved it.”

“It made you cry.”

“They weren’t sad tears,” you whispered. He took a moment to clear his throat, leaning against the railing. He lowered his head, breathing deeply. “Will you write me more letters?”

“Yeah,” he breathed out, turning to you with a smile. “I’ll write you more letters. I just thought you didn’t like the way I ended it.”

“I don’t snore,” you said, getting a laugh out of him. “I don’t.”

“Yes you do but they’re tiny baby snores. It’s cute,” he said, looking down again. “I meant the dad thing.”

“You call yourself that all the time.” He sighed, straightening up.

“I know. But that’s not a title I’ve earned with you. I just…” he closed his eyes, shoulders tensing. 

“That was my favorite part.” He turned slowly, blinking his eyes rapidly. You shrugged, a small whisper of a smile forming on your lips. “Why the hell wouldn’t I love when you tell me you love me?”

“I can love you as Jensen. You never, ever, have to call me anything other than that and it doesn’t change a thing about how I feel about you.” 

You nodded, looking out at the dark river beyond. The air was quiet, Jensen still, at ease next to you.

“We should invite everyone down here before they wonder what the hell’s going on,” you said. You felt him start to turn, your hand catching his arm. He looked down at it before finding your face. You smiled, taking a deep breath. “Can you bring down stuff for smores?”

“I can do that,” he said, getting a half step away.

“Dad,” you said, glancing over your shoulder, his whole body freezing. He spun around, surprise written all over his face. You grinned wider, tilting your head at him. “Don’t forget the napkins this time.”

“Right. Napkins.” He blinked a few times, glancing at the house and then you. “Are you sure-”

“Dad. Don’t make a big deal out of it.” He held up his hands. “I’m serious.”

“Alright. Smores coming right up.”

You woke up early the next day, padding down the hall and finding Jensen and Danneel sitting on the covered back porch with mugs of coffee in front of them. With a yawn, you saw him wave you over and grumbled. You’d taken to drinking coffee the past few months when you started working so much and had developed a craving for it in the mornings.

“Morning,” you mumbled, taking a seat at the table and stealing the closest cup to you. You took a big, slow gulp, humming to yourself. 

“I need that more than you do,” said Jensen, taking the mug back, taking a drink. “Sleep okay?”

You nodded, rubbing your eye when Danneel leaned over and gave you a side hug. “Can we be normal again guys? I get yesterday was a big deal but I just want to go back to being Y/N.”

“We’re huggers,” he said as she squeezed tighter. “Speaking of which, we have one last present for you, from my parents. They asked us to give it to you privately. Don’t worry, you’ll like it.”

You raised an eyebrow, Danneel releasing you only to reach across the table and tug over a blue bag. “Go on.”

With a roll of your eyes, you reached in the bag and pulled out a picture frame. Turning it over, you saw a slightly grainy image of you as a toddler, maybe three years old at most. Except the other person in the picture, the person who’s hip you were sat on as you clung your tiny arms around their neck, was a young Jensen of all people.

You snapped your eyes over to him, a silly look on his face. “What is this?”

“When Jensen was in his twenties, they went on a family trip to disney world,” said Dee, hugging your side again. “When he was at the airport, there was a lost little girl and he helped her. Do you remember that at all?”

You titled your head, staring at him, eyes widening briefly. “You? T-That was you?”

“My mom was going through some old home movies and found footage from when that happened a while ago. She only told me last night and gave me a picture like that too. She thinks it’s a sign.”

“It is a sign,” said Danneel, your gaze going back to the picture. “You’re exactly where you’re supposed to be.”

“Y/N, if I had somehow known back then what your future was…” You nodded, offering him a smile. “I wish I’d known and could have been there for you.”

“S’okay,” you said quietly, smirking at the picture. “Like mom said, I’m where I’m supposed to be now.”

“Exactly,” she said, your arms wrapping around her waist as she hugged you tight. You felt another pair of arms wrap around you both and squeeze. “So, did you text that boy from the pier yet?”

“Uh, actually yeah,” you said, heat creeping into your face. “He’s from Dallas. He seems nice.”

Thankfully they dropped it when there was a crash in the house and JJ came rushing over, covered in milk. Dee sighed and scooped her up, you and Jensen following behind to clean up the floor.

“Y/N,” he said as you used a roll of paper towels to soak up the half gallon splashed across the floor. You hummed, glancing up when you noticed he’d stopped cleaning. “I’m going to say this once and only once because I trust you. The person you end up with, make sure they’re a good one. I don’t want you to end up with an asshole who only tells you what you want to hear.”

“I won’t. I’ve got a pretty good example of how the guy I end up with should treat me.” You continued to clean up, shaking your head. “Besides, there’s no way that I end up with that TJ guy. Like zero chance.”

“That why you keep staring at your phone with a stupid smile on your face whenever you get a text?” You growled, Jensen chuckling. “Oh come on, I can’t tease you about boys? This is too much fun for me.”

“Dad,” you groaned. He only beamed though, smiling as you rolled your eyes. “You’re such a dork.”

“Yup. Just remember you picked us dorks.” You glanced over at him, a tiny sliver of a smile coming through. “Too late to change your mind now.”

“You’re alright for an old guy,” you teased. 

“Just alright?” he asked. You shrugged.

“Maybe a little more than alright,” you said, getting a head ruffle, stilling when you realized he’d just gotten milk all in your hair. “Dude! Gross!”

“I love you too, kiddo.”

__________

A/N: Let me know what you thought of this part with a comment or reblog as I'm very interested!

[livingdeadblondequeen]

Shared Love

Jenneel x reader

*this is a work of fiction. I do not usually write RPF but I couldn’t get this out of my head*

TMZ Breaks the News: Jensen and Danneel Ackles in a Threesome with The Walking Dead Star

In a shocking twist of events, popular actor Supernatural Jensen Ackles and his wife, Danneel, have been spotted kissing well-known actress Y/N YLN from The Walking Dead. The scandalous photos, obtained exclusively by TMZ, show the trio sharing a passionate embrace in a secluded location.

Fans of both shows are reeling from the unexpected revelation. Many are expressing disbelief and shock, while others are speculating about the full nature of their relationship. Some fans are questioning the traditional norms of monogamy, while others are expressing concern about the impact this news may have on the actors' careers.

Fan Reactions:

@SupernaturalFan123: "I can't believe this! Jensen and Danneel are my favorite couple. I hope this is just doesn’t blow up in their faces."

@TWDAddict: "Wow, this is a lot to take in. I'm happy for Y/N because the Ackles are beautiful but I'm also a little disappointed in Jensen and Danneel."

@JDMFan: "I'm not judging, but this is definitely a choice. I wonder how Jared and Misha feel about this."

@OpenRelationshipAdvocate: "I'm actually kind of excited about this. It's great to see people exploring different relationship dynamics."

@WorriedFan: "I hope this doesn't ruin their careers. They're all such talented actors."

The Ackles themselves first started dating in 2008, then marrying in 2010 and currently have one child together. This is the not first time that the three have been photographed together, they have been known to be friends since the three met at Comic Con two years before, but never in a scandalous embrace. Fans are left stunned by the unexpected revelation.

A day later, Jensen, Danneel, and Y/N took to Instagram to confirm the news. In a joint post, they revealed that they had been dating for several months and had kept their relationship private to just their close friends and family.

"We understand that this might be surprising to some, but we hope that our fans will respect our decision to be open about our relationship," they wrote. "We are all very happy and in love, and we appreciate the support we have received."

The announcement was met with a mixed reaction. While some fans were supportive, others were skeptical and expressed concerns about the unconventional nature of their relationship.

While the news may come as a surprise to many, close friends of the couple, including Jared Padalecki, Norman Reedus, and Lauren Cohan, who admitted to being the one to introduce the three to each other, have expressed their full support for their decision. Jared, in particular, has been a strong advocate for open relationships and has often spoken about the importance of communication and trust in a healthy partnership.

The news has sparked a wider conversation about the changing nature of relationships in Hollywood and the increasing acceptance of non-traditional relationship structures. Some have argued that celebrities should be free to live their lives as they see fit, while others have raised concerns about the potential for exploitation and coercion within polyamorous relationships.

The public will be keeping a close eye on this new development, waiting to see what will happen next.

[sara78]

Family don't end in blood - chapter 8

Summary: Y/N had a fun two months off filming and she's finally coming to the grounds with where she's standing and who's got her back. But once again, a few words make all hell break loose in her head and she does something that sets off a domino effect on her and people around her, but it might ultimately lead to a positive outcome...

Word count: 6.000 and probably more

Pairings: Jensen Ackles x foster!Daughter reader

Warnings: angst, so much angst, scary situation (nothing big but if this triggers you SKIP!), Y/N is a lucky bastard to have these people by her side, Y/N's brain is a bitch

Word count:

A/N: This one's a roller-coaster, please fasten your seatbelts!

It's been quite a few weeks since everything unraveled. You would lie if you said that being at Jensen's didn't help. Having three kids eat your brains out occupied you a lot, but Jensen and Danneel made sure that you had your me time. You had a lot of talks with Jensen, Danneel and Jared and thought still confused as to why are they helping you, you were extremely grateful for everything they gave you.

The best time for you was the entirety of January. You finished your first semester of school, with all A's, which made everyone so happy because they all knew you worked yourself into the ground for it and you, for the first time in your life, felt like you were actually proud of what you were doing and your grades and all things you've accomplished this semester. It felt scary, as you closed in your last first semester of high school and were going to start the very last semester of high school ever, and you didn't know what will you do after that chapter of your life is behind you. But you didn't feel any rush, as you were financially more than stable and you have all the time and no pressure to find out just what you want to do with your life. And, well, it felt nice to know that even if you mess up or don't have a plan waiting for you to jump into it, you wouldn't be beaten to death, which definitely helped.

On the topic of beating to death, you were finally letting people close to you in. You finally felt like they weren't going to hurt you. You allowed yourself to let your guards down, even a little bit, even just slightly. It meant a lot to know you could do that. Jensen, Jared and Danneel made sure you were comfortable and they gave you a safe place where you could be just who you are.

You felt like you were finally beginning to heal.

January was also your birthday month and you didn't expect your birthday to go the way it did, but if you were being honest, you haven't had that much fun in such a long time. Your birthday was always special to you, since that was one of those rare moments when your mother put down the bat and let you enjoy yourself for a day with your friends. It felt like she was an actual, loving human being for that one day of the year. You didn't expect anyone to remember your birthday in the first place, but you were a fool to think that when you live with Jensen and Jared next door.

The kids had a sleepover at their grandparents' for the weekend, leaving you alone with Jensen and Danneel. You and Dee had maybe a little too much fun beating Jensen in Mario kart, which he fully allowed. Well, half of it was him allowing you to win. The other half was him just... Not knowing how to play.

The game was interrupted with the door bell going off. You said you were gonna get it, as Danneel was in the midst of kicking Jensen's ass. You walked up to the front door and opened it, revealing a short woman with glasses and a bunch of papers in her hands.

"Hi, how can I help you?" you said with a kind smile,

"Hello, are you Y/N Y/L/N?" you nod, "My name is Jane McAllister. I work in child protective services. You have been disowned and as a minor you are required to come with me and be in the foster care until you're 18 years old."

You froze right there.

Disowned?

"Hey, what's going on here?" Jensen's voice rang behind you as you felt him walk up to where you were standing, at a loss of words, "How can we help you?"

"I will not repeat myself. You have to come with me now," Jane responded and Jensen immediately flew into protective mode, pushing you behind his back,

"You will very much repeat yourself. What do you want from my kid?"

"First of all, she's not your kid," she corrected him, "She has been disowned and is now a part of the foster care system until she turns 18 years old."

"Disowned?" Jensen asked, "Disowning a child is a felony in the US. What do you mean she was disowned?"

"It might be a felony in the US, but it's very not in Y/H/C. She is not a US citizen and therefore she is not falling under the laws here. She will however, as an unsupervised minor, be placed in an orphanage and into foster care until someone picks her. I will have to warn you, teenagers are almost never picked. Especially if they... Look like that," she said, eyeing you from head to toe,

"Well she is not unsupervised, she has a place to stay at and I do not allow you to take her. How's that sound?"

"I do not have a problem with alerting the police, mister..." she looked down to one of the papers for a second, "Ackles."

"Then we'll be her foster parents," Danneel said as she showed up right behind you, "And we got no problem with adopting her. Right, honey?" she said, looking up to Jensen who nod,

"As far as I can tell, you do not have any records of fostering or a profile opened, for that matter. The process of opening a profile is very time consuming and it takes months, even years in your case, since you do not qualify high, as you have three children of your own and you are celebrities. Even if you tried, your poor attempt will be seen as a publicity stunt and it'll be immediately turned down."

"Try us," Jensen growled, "You're not taking Y/N away from here. This is her home."

"I'm afraid it's not."

"I'm afraid you're trespassing," Danneel growled, "Give Y/N the paperwork and leave. You can only come back with a warrant and take her if you have actual solid proof that you got rights and laws backing you up in your action, not just small-talk us into it. Otherwise she's staying with us."

"You are aware this looks like you are forcingly keeping her in? Like you're kidnapping her? You do know that is a felony for you, even if she's not a US citizen?"

"I don't want to go," you whispered, totally out of it, Jensen looking back at you, Danneel's arm on your back, rubbing it gently, "I want to stay."

"I'm sorry honey. But what I'm doing is for the best," she smiled at you but you shook your head, turning around and meeting Danneel for a tight hug, "Expect me with officers in less than 24 hours. Until we meet again," she said, shoving papers into Jensen's hands and walking away. Jensen closed the door and leaned against it with a loud groan. Danneel let go of you and opened her hand towards Jensen,

"Give me those. I'll contact our lawyer and see what the hell is going on and what we can do," Jensen did as told, handing her the papers before pulling you in for a tight hug which you gladly took.

It seemed like hours later when Jensen finally let you out of his warm embrace and looked you in the eye.

You didn't cry. You didn't have a reason to do so. If nothing, you were happy this is happening.

It took you a hot second to realize what's going on in this whole situation. At first you were taken over with fear. But then it dawned on what you should actually do.

"I'll go."

"What?!" Jensen exclaimed, "Not two minutes ago you said you don't wanna go. Whatever happened to that?"

"I didn't understand what was going on. I now do."

"Yeah? Enlighten me, doctor Phil," he sassed,

"My mother disowned me. She wants to get rid of me. She thinks that I'm weak and I suffer when I'm alone. Joke is on her, as I never really had anyone by my side, but she still thinks it's true. Being in foster care, in an orphanage, with the way I look, I'll be isolated, on my own. And even if someone picks me, I'll be beaten, bullied, abused. That's what she wants," you explained, Jensen shaking his head, "I'm gonna make a lot of noise if the cops show up tomorrow. I'll just go turn myself in first thing tomorrow morning."

"That's a no," Jensen said, "You're not going anywhere."

"I don't want to make a scene. I don't want to scare anyone. If she wants me to be there, then so be it. It's okay. It's just for a year. I'll be free in a year and it'll be all okay. I won't have to hear about her ever again. I'll be my own person."

"You are not going anywhere. You got a life here. You can't throw away everything. That's exactly what she wants you to do! Throw away everything you've worked yourself into the ground for. What if she has some sort of a sick, twisted plan up her sleeve? Huh? How did CPS even know you were here? What if she is behind that woman, what if they're working together or... I don't fucking know, what if your mother changes her identity and comes in to foster care you? She takes you with her. Goes MIA. What then?" you gulped, looking down, "What then, when we can't find you? Who knows what the fuck she can do to you. You said it yourself. She's mental. I've seen that sinister look in her eyes. There's a big fat reason she did this and for all I know she could easily manipulate and play outside the rules to get to you. You can't risk going there. You can't risk everything you've built already, your life, your safety. Dee is on the phone with our lawyer and we'll do everything we can to keep you here."

"Jensen, trust me, you don't want me to be your kid."

"Yes we do," Danneel spoke up softly, making you turn around to look at her, "You belonged here ever since you walked in through that door. And after everything you've been through, giving you a family is the least we could do to help you heal."

"How are things looking?" Jensen asked and Danneel sighed,

"We have to meet with our lawyer first thing tomorrow morning. This smells bad on so many fronts and we will discuss this scenario in more detail tomorrow. As of now, he will try to push us into the foster care system and have us take her case," Danneel said, "We hope it'll work out. But you are in no way leaving. You're not going into an orphanage. Not on our watch. Only place you're going to is the bathroom, to take a nice shower and then we'll talk some more. Okay?" you gulped, nodding as you padded off to the guest room to grab your clothes.

Your mind shifted to a dark place when you walked away from Jensen and Danneel.

Part of your brain wanted to believe Jensen was right, that your mother had something planned and she was waiting to get a hold of you somehow. It was rational.

But you couldn't think straight.

All your brain could think of is that you shouldn't be here.

You're dangerous.

Your mother is dangerous. Ways her actions would go to hurt you are dangerous.

And if she knew one thing, it's that you hurt the most when people you love hurt. That was the game she played when she wanted to control you. Hurt people you love.

You couldn't afford to be here anymore.

You sneaked out of the house, since Jensen and Danneel were upstairs in their room and couldn't see you when you walked out. You didn't even get any of your stuff. You just... Walked away.

Every step you took hurt you more, and you knew you'd be the happiest ever if you were to stay there forever and finally have a life-long dream of yours come true, but now wasn't the time for your happiness, but their safety. You kept looking back until the house disappeared in the darkness of the night. A quiet tear rolled down your cheek. Now you had nowhere to go.

You shivered as rain began to pour while you wandered to wherever this road took you. Of course it would start raining and there would be a storm brewing as well. Shows just how lucky you were. And the fact that you were in shorts and a flannel didn't help the situation much.

You were wandering down the streets, now already in a rural area of Austin. Jensen's house was already downtown so it didn't take a lot of walking before you were basically in the middle of nowhere. You couldn't see a single soul out here, besides trees and forests and the thought that something might jump out at any moment and any angle scared you. This whole situation scared you.

This wasn't your first time wandering on streets, in the night, by yourself. But never before were you scared like this. You could tell something bad will happen, again.

Every time you thought about how bad this idea was, you remembered Jensen and his family, and the thought would leave your mind. They were safe. No matter how much you loved them, they were safe without you around. And, well, just because you love someone, doesn't mean you get to stick around and screw up their life.

Cars passed by, splashing you, but the drivers didn't pay attention. Why would they? You were a nobody after all. Everyone had somewhere to go. Everyone had a home to go to. Everyone besides you.

You were wondering what to do now. You're going the opposite way from the city, from the orphanage or wherever you're supposed to be at. You left your phone back home and you knew that you shouldn't be wandering around these parts. You thought it would be a good idea to find some abandoned place and stay for the night, then make it back to town tomorrow. You were guessing that, if he was looking, Jensen was probably looking for you somewhere in town. You had to work around downtown as a whole if you were to go to the orphanage without him or any of the neighbors noticing you.

A black SUV went by you and you froze when you saw it brake suddenly. You forgot your glasses back at Jensen's place and you couldn't make out the plates, but Jensen didn't drive an SUV so that was already a red flag for you.

You swerved your path towards the forest instantly, lowering your head down as far as you could as you tried to find a bush to hide in or a tree to climb up on as you began to walk faster. You began running for your life when you heard steps grow closer behind you and you jumped on the first tree in your sight. But your legs began to slip and you felt your body slip down the tree as well, the surface wet and not very manageable to climb. Just when you were about to slip off the tree you felt arms wrapping around your waist and you began trashing as the person pulled you off the tree. You didn't let up, trying to get away from the hold, digging your short nails into the arms that tightly held you, trying to hurt and kick the man away.

"For fucks sake munchkin stop, it's me," Jared's voice rang over the rain, "It's just me. It's Jared. It's Jare, you're okay," he continued, still holding you tight and waiting for you to stop trashing.

As soon as you heard his voice, something broke inside you. You didn't know what it was. Was it all that fear, anger, sadness built-up that finally broke free? Or was it the fact that Jared is out here in pouring rain, looking for you? And if he was out here, then so was Jensen.

In reality, it was the realization that both of them were so scared that something bad had happened to you and you were gone, scared to the point where they don't care about the circumstances and would do anything to try and find you.

And then, that ear-piercing scream you've let out was some sort of a realization that you hurt people you didn't intend to and fucked things up beyond repair this time.

But you weren't going to let up.

"Stop, stop, stop," he tried, grunting as he tried to console your trashing body, "I'm not gonna let you go. You're not leaving us. You're safe."

"Let me go!"

"No," Jared shook his head, "Not gonna happen. You can punch me or the tree or yell out to the sky or at my face and do whatever you want to do to let all of that anger, sadness and fear built up go, but you're not going to leave your home and your family."

"You're not my family and that's not my home! Let me go!"

Jared put you down but he was fast to grab the collar of your flannel, almost lifting you off the ground with how strong he gripped at it,

"We're not your family?" he asked. You couldn't tell if he was crying because of all the rain but you could hear it in his voice and in the way he looked at you, "Is that why Jensen showed up on my doorstep, crying, begging me on his knees to help me find you?" he asked, shaking your entire body when tugging at your hoodie, "Is that why both of us are out here in pouring rain, trying to find you? Is that why we are both scared to death and we thought that bitch kidnapped you? Is that what someone who hates you does? Or is it someone who cares and loves you?"

"You're not safe with me around!" you exclaimed,

"We don't give a flying fuck!" he shot back at you, "You're my niece, Jensen's daughter, and whatever shit comes your way we'll solve it together! Running away isn't going to fix anything. It's only going to break everything."

"I-I can't," you sobbed, looking down, "I-I'm not Jensen's daughter. I'm a nobody."

"Yeah? Tell me then, why he's out here now, desperately trying to find you? Because he despises you from the deepest parts of his soul? Y/N, he loves you. We all love you. I don't know how long it'll take you to figure it out but we don't want to hurt you or scare you. We want to give you everything you ever needed - love. And no matter how long it takes you to understand, we will be here all the same and we will love you all the same and prove you day to day that you're worth it and that you deserve it. You need to tell me one thing - did she take you?" you shook your head and Jared heavily leaned against one of the trees, looking up to the sky as he let out a sigh in relief, but still tightly holding the collar of your flannel, "Okay. That's honestly the best news I've heard tonight."

"Best news? I ran," you pointed out,

"You do not want to know what scenarios went through Jensen's head, through my head. We were so scared she took you, Y/N. We didn't know what to think."

"I can't stay around with everything that's happening."

"Do you love Jensen and Danneel? Me? The kids?"

"YES!" you yelled out, "And that's the exact reason I can't stay! I can't put you in danger! Jared, please. Let me go. Tell dad-tell Jensen that I'm okay, and that I have to go and just let me go. It's for the best."

"You can't win this one, munchkin. I can only think of how dark and twisted your mind is because I've never seen you as a runner but you did it. It must be so bad up there if you acted like this. But everything is fixable."

"Even if I do come back, they won't want me anymore. What's the point in going back then?"

"Yeah, I'm gonna ask you again - if they don't want you anymore, why am I here right now? If Jensen didn't care you think he'd be kneeling and begging me to help him find you? If he didn't care he would have let you go, which is the complete opposite of what he did. Munchkin, I know you never had anyone stand by your side, but you have to understand this - there isn't an outcome where you win this war that has you running away from home and people who love you and people who you love. I know you want to fight this one alone and I know you're capable and strong, but this isn't a war you can win by yourself. You need an ally and you have us. You with me?" you nod, looking up into his eyes, hair falling into his sight but you could see honesty in the way he looked at you, "How about we move out of here and let your dad know that you're safe?" you approached Jared carefully before climbing on your tiptoes and wrapping your arms around his neck. He helped you by picking you up and squeezing you tightly, giving you one of his famous moose hugs as he carried you back to his car.

"Brother, she's gone," you gasped quietly at the vulnerability in Jensen's voice when he answered Jared's call, "I can't find her, that bitch took her I-"

"Brother, breathe. I found her," Jared cut him off and Jensen sobbed on the other end, "Our kid is fine. Soaking wet and scared of what's to come, but fine."

"Y/N, are-are you okay?" Jensen whispered, voice cracking,

"Yeah," you responded, hearing Jensen exhale loudly,

"I'll drive her over to you. Are you home?"

"Yeah, uh yeah. Didn't leave the car. I thought-I thought I was gonna tell Dee that-"

"Y/N is fine, Jensen. I'll be there in five. Do you trust me, brother?"

"With my life."

"Then trust me when I say I'm bringing your kid home."

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it. Now go tell Danneel. Meet you in the garage."

You stayed quiet for the entirety of the short conversation Jared had with Jensen. You were speechless. You didn't think Jensen was going to lose it as much as he did. Part of you thought he wouldn't even go looking for you. That part of you was definitely wrong though.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you," Jared spoke up, "I didn't mean it to come out that loud. I couldn't hear myself, with the rain and all. Did I scare you?" you shook your head,

"Not-not with talking. I-I thought you were going to kidnap me. I left my glasses back at Jensen's and I didn't make out your licence plate. I... I thought it was her."

"You didn't hear me calling your name?" he asked and you shook your head, "You were very scared. I kept calling your name but you didn't budge and then you jumped that tree and you were going to slip and fall and... I'm sorry."

"It's okay. I'm the one who's supposed to apologize."

"Not really," Jared shook his head, "In my mind, you got overwhelmed, scared, and in moment of vulnerability you acted out and thought running away was a good decision. You made a mistake but that's okay. We all make mistakes."

"Why do you love me?" you then asked, Jared smiling gently,

"Can you explain why you love people close to you?" you sat in silence, trying to put it into words but miserably failing, "See? We can't explain it. I can't explain it at least. You grew to me. You grew to Jensen. We just love you with all we have."

"What do you think will happen to me now?"

"Well you are first of all going to get two bone-crushing hugs. Then you'll actually take that shower you never took and you'll probably have a sleepover in Jensen's and Danneel's bedroom. Lots of talks. Jensen will be clingy for a while too."

"Why?"

"Because when something bad happens to someone he loves more than himself, he gets scared. He gets vulnerable to the point where he's clinging to the person and he's just... Scared. How I know? I've been with him when he was scared. I've been in his shoes too. And only thing you can do is reassure him that it won't happen again and be by his side. He needs that reassurance. I might use it too."

"I-I won't run away again," you said as Jared pulled into Jensen's driveway, "I promise."

"Even if you do, I'll find you," Jared smiled as he put the car into park, "We'll always come for you. But I choose to trust you and the promise you made."

The door on your side is swinging open and you're picked up by Jensen in no time. He's squeezing you tightly and you swore you felt Jensen sob as he leaned against Jared's car while he held you tightly. You couldn't do much but burrow your face into his shoulder and try your best not to cry as you grabbed the back of his soaked shirt.

"Brother, let's go inside," Jared's voice rang and it seemed to pull Jensen back to reality. He put you down but as soon as he did so, both his hands are cupping your cheeks and you're looking him in the eyes, red at the edges with so many emotions in them. You can't explain the feeling his look set off in you, but you could see how terribly you've screwed up.

Danneel is grabbing both yours and Jensen's hand and she's squeezing you for a side hug, Jensen getting the same treatment on the other side, as she walks you both into the house with Jared on your tail.

You're given a towel and a fresh set of clothes and you walk away to shower without a word.

You didn't know what to expect after you came out of the shower. The entire time you kept thinking of ways to apologize, but you knew no words could put together how bad you felt.

You were plain stupid to pull this thing off and you will probably never forgive yourself for doing this to everybody. You scared everyone because you were selfish, once again.

You finally understood that this war can't be won on your own. But would you find an ally in Jensen and his family now? In Jared, Misha? Would they look you in the eye after what you've done? More importantly, would you be able to look at them?

What you didn't expect when you opened the bathroom door was to find Jensen sitting on the floor right next to the door, back leaning against the wall. He looked up at you and your gut twisted and turned at all the pain you could read in his expression. He stood up and gently took your hand, leading you to the bedroom he shared with Danneel.

On the spare bench-bed in their room you had the full setup waiting for you. Your blankie, pillow, phone, the book you read, everything. You nod in thanking as Danneel sent you a soft smile. Jensen led you to the bench and sat you down on it before he leaned down and kissed your forehead. He smiled softly at you and you smiled back,

"I think it's best to stay close tonight," Danneel spoke up as she walked up to Jensen, "For all of us."

"Is Jared okay?" you asked,

"No rain can take out our favorite moose," Danneel responded, making you smile weakly, "I think we could use some sleep before talking about it all. How's that sound?" you nod, "But before that. Are you okay?" you nod again, looking down,

"I'm sorry for-"

"We're not asking that," Danneel cut you off, "All we care about right now is that you're okay."

Jensen didn't say a word. Instead, he leaned down to kiss the top of your head, Danneel doing the same. They made a few short steps to their bed while you laid down and watched as Jensen curled on his side and into Danneel's hold, the same way you curled into Jensen many times before. You grabbed your pillow, wrapping yourself around it and making yourself as small as possible as you squeezed it to your chest, burrowing your head into the blankie resting on your pillow.

You woke up to soft whimpers and it doesn't take you a lot to figure out where you are. You looked up to where Danneel and Jensen slept and found Danneel wide awake, shushing Jensen down. You gulped, standing up and walking over to their bed. Without a word you climbed onto what was supposed to be Jensen's side if he weren't absolutely squeezed against Danneel,

"He's got a nightmare," she said tiredly, "It's gonna take him a few minutes to ride it out."

"He has them often?" you asked and she shook her head, making you gulp,

"Only when he's really scared."

Only thing you thought of doing was plain stupid but it wouldn't hurt if you were going to do it.

You lifted your left hand and let it rest on his head, rubbing reassuring circles on it with your thumb. Danneel smiled,

"He does that to you, doesn't he?" she asked and you nod, "He does it to everyone he loves. It's his way of showing he cares deeply for you."

"I told him I were often hit in the head but his head rubs helped ease my headaches after nightmares. Didn't know it was his love language."

"It is. He's a very gentle soul. Even though he plays rough a lot."

"Outside world doesn't like gentle souls. You gotta stay rough out there if you want to stay alive."

"No seventeen year old should know that," Danneel frowned,

"I'm not your typical seventeen year old," you responded,

"I know that," she sighed, "Shhh sweetheart," she cooed as Jensen whimpered, still asleep, "It's just a bad dream. Everything is okay. Whatever it is, it's okay."

You gulped, looking down. The way he curled up reminded you of yourself. You could only imagine what his nightmares were. Hell, for all you know, you were the exact reason he had them.

Your train of thoughts got delayed as Jensen sat up abruptly in bed, breathing ragged as he looked to his left, where you slept. You could see his back tense as he looked back to Danneel, his left hand pointing at the empty bench,

"She-She's gone, Dee she's missing she took her we never found her Dee I gotta find her I-"

"Jensen, I'm right here," you whispered, making him turn around completely to face you.

It took you a moment to get back from awe you were left in when you heard Jensen's voice, uttering those words you didn't expect to hear. But as soon as you realized how scared he was, you didn't hesitate to crawl up to where he sat, completely silent, and give him a tight hug he gladly took.

It took him a few minutes before he let you go. His eyes were glued on yours for a few more seconds before he laid back down and curled in Danneel's hold.

You didn't know if you were ever going to be able to fix what you've broken here.

You stayed in bed for a few more seconds, watching him cuddle up to Danneel. She looked up at you with a tired, honest smile. You pressed your lips in a line, remembering Jared's words.

Telling him that you're sorry won't fix it.

Doing something to prove him you're sorry and to prove him that you're grateful for him will maybe do a thing or two.

You tapped Jensen's shoulder gently. He rolled to his back and looked at you, eyes watery and vulnerable. You leaned down to kiss his cheek.

"I love you," were only words you could think of and as you said them stood up and went back to where you slept. You turned your back to face their bed and you tightly hugged your pillow.

You knew a stupid kiss on the cheek and a stupid I love you won't fix a single thing and it probably meant nothing to him. But you felt like it was the least you could do in that given moment.

Not even a minute later, you felt a finger tap your shoulder. You rolled onto your back and Jensen smiled softly at you, leaning to kiss your temple and whisper a soft "I love you too," before he walked back to bed.

You woke up again to the sound of Danneel's phone going off. You heard her talk to someone on the other end and you just grumbled as you turned around on the other side and it wasn't long before Danneel tapped your shoulder gently,

"Honey, I totally forgot the twins have a class party today and I was in charge of some treats. I'll go sort all of that out and I'll call our lawyer too to see when he can see us, since he has other clients as well. I'll let you know via text."

"Can I let him sleep in?" you whispered and Danneel smiled as she nod, "Thanks."

"Don't thank me," she kissed the top of your head, "Sit in our bed. It's a tad bit more comfortable than that bench. I'm outta here. See y'all later."

"Hey," Jensen whispered as he found you reading a book while seated in Danneel's spot, "Where's Dee?"

"Because of all the mayhem I made last night, she forgot the twins had a class party and she was supposed to bring treats and snacks so she went to do that and she'll let us-" you stopped talking as your phone vibrated, "Pardon, she just let me know that we will meet with your lawyer at 11AM and uh... Get me some family, I guess."

The smile Jensen let out felt like a huge relief, especially after all of the emotions showed last night. This smile gave you a slight hope that maybe someday this will be a rather bad memory for everyone involved.

"I'll go make us some breakfast," you said as you went to stand up from where you were seated, but Jensen gently grabbed your hand,

"Thanks for staying here last night," he whispered, "It meant a lot to me."

"I scared the living shit out of you. The least I could do is stay by your side when you were scared."

"Yet that's exactly what you refuse when you're scared," Jensen smiled sadly at you and you looked down,

"You made me a promise," you whispered, finding courage to look up to Jensen, "Months ago. That as long as you're around, nobody will hurt me. I think I should make you a promise too."

"Kiddo, you don't have to-"

"I promise you to never run away on you again. Never, ever leave you again. Last night it finally clicked for me and I let myself truly believe in you. Up until last night I was waiting for the moment where you're going to up and leave me. Hell, I was pushing your buttons and trying to make you do that multiple times too. Last night I realized that you're not here to hurt me and that I can trust you, no bullshit. The mere fact that you were outside last night, looking for me, was enough for me to understand that you weren't doing everything you've been doing out of pity. And when I heard you last night... Jensen, she didn't take me. I ran. It was just me. Me and my stupid brain."

"Tell me one thing," he said, "Did your heart stay on the other end? On the end where you wanted to stay here and not leave?" you nod and he smiled,

"Then we're good. You unfortunately got hurt so many times before because you followed your heart and you had to grow out of that habit. But you've been following your heart recently, and I assure you that you're never going to be hurt by any of us for following what's in there," he smiled softly, "You scared me. Big time. But knowing that your heart was here this whole time makes it easier for me."

"I know I scared you. I scared Dee too. Jared... I don't think I'm ever going to forgive myself for doing this. That's why I'm making you a promise to never leave you again. And I know it's nothing but it's a start. I'll prove you that I meant what I promised."

"You've got nothing to prove. Your heart was here last night, wanting to stay home. That's enough proof for me that you want to be here. Even that smart brain up there must have entertained the thought too, but it had to think more rational. I know it'll take a lot of time to get used to it and sometimes you'll feel like you're not welcome and your feelings will get the best of you, but as I promised - as long as I'm around, nothing bad is going to happen to you. Physically and emotionally."

"Do you still want me here?" you asked, a little unsure, "After the stunt I pulled last night?"

"Yes. You belong here. And mistakes will be made but we're all human and we make mistakes. And no matter how stupid those stunts you pull were or will be, I'll still love you," he smiled, sitting up to give you a tight hug you gladly took, "Let's get ready. Dee's gonna kill us if we're late."

A/N 2: Thanks for reading! And thanks @crasmuna for being my consultant and for being my biggest support 💚

[crashdevlin]

Losses and Gains 4- Something Wrong

Author’s Note: This is the fourth chapter of Losses and Gains, the second part of To Have it All. This is Something More...from Jensen's side!

Second Author's note: I'm sorry this took so damn long to get out. I won't bore you with the details but I'm on new meds and things should be getting better from now on. Love all of you that have stuck around.

Summary: Jensen is having trouble letting go...and maybe he's imagining it, but it seems Y/n is having troubles too.

Pairing:  Jensen x Reader, background Reader x Tom Hiddleston

Word count: 3386

Story Warnings: open marriage, mentions of depression and heartbreak, bad things, alcohol as a crutch, anger, fighting

~~~

"What did you do?!" Misha's voice went up by at least three octaves as he pointed to the workers taking my broken flatscreen out to the dumpster so they could fit the new one in its place.

“It broke,” I responded, hoping that he wouldn’t press. It’s Misha, though, so of course, he insisted.

“How?!”

“Coffee machine slipped. It’s fine. I got a new one coming.”

“A new TV or a new coffee machine?”

I rolled my eyes. “Both. It’s not a big deal, Misha. Seriously.”

“Hey, is everything okay? I mean, I don’t wanna pry but-”

“Then don’t,” I interrupted. “I’m fine. Everything is fine.”

“Oh…kay,” he said skeptically. “Well…have you heard about Y/n and Tom Hiddleston? Ya know, I knew something was going on between them. I could just see them together…and they are a cute couple, don’t you think?”

I had to stop myself from stomping away like a fucking child. Misha didn’t know, and I couldn’t let him in on it now, so I made an excuse. “Yeah, they’re adorable. I’m gonna go check on the movers.”

I was standing off to the side, watching them put my new TV on its mount, when the trailer rocked, and Jared stepped up into the kitchenette with me. “So, I take it you saw Tom’s post?” He ran his hand over the dent in the fridge. I didn’t look at him, just gave a nod as I watched the workers. “You took it out on your stuff this time, not Danneel, so I guess that’s progress.”

I clenched my jaw for a minute before turning to him. “She didn’t even want him to tell people. You know that, right?”

“But he could tell people…and that’s what you’re upset about.”

“You think I’m jealous?”

“You think you’re not?” He scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest. “You can’t be that deluded, Ackles. All of this is because you’re jealous of him, that he can give her what you never could. You don’t want her happy.”

“I’m not--Of course, I want her happy, Jared.”

“Only if she’s with you.” I focused on the workers again. “You’re sabotaging your marriage. You’re sabotaging yourself. All because you don’t want her to find happiness with anyone else.”

“I’m not sabotaging shit.”

“You’re sabotaging everything.” He stepped in front of me, obscuring my view to force me to focus on him. I stared at his shoulder, but I refused to look at his face. “You have to stop this. You have to learn how to deal. You have to let her be happy with someone else.”

“Is she?” My jaw clenched as I let my eyes jump to his. “She’s barely even talking to anybody anymore. Kim and Bri haven’t heard from her in weeks. When’s the last time she called you?”

He looked away this time. “She’d tell us if she were having problems.”

“No, she wouldn’t,” I whispered, angrily. “She knows she’s made her bed and she would fucking lay in it, Jared. That’s who she is. She doesn’t wanna hurt anyone so she’d stick it out with him because that’s the option that she thinks will hurt the fewest people! So, what if she’s not happy? Jared, what if he’s…” I looked at my feet as tears popped up in my eyes. “What if she misses me?”

He sighed and reached out to pull me into a hug. “Of course, she does. She can miss you and be happy with him. She was in love with you, too, and that didn’t go away. It’s gonna be okay. You just gotta breathe and focus on the good, man.”

I swallowed down my tears and pulled away from him. “I don’t know if I can do it. She’s coming back next week. I don’t think I can be in the same place as her and not…not fucking break, man.”

He ran his hand through his hair and turned to look at the new TV as the workers turned it on to test it. “She’ll be here next week. I can check on her. She won’t be able to lie to me…not to my face. I’ll make sure she’s okay.”

“You’d do that for me?”

“She’s still my friend, too, Jay…and you’re right. She hasn’t been talking. I hope that she’s just busy and things are good but she hasn’t been talking to anybody. Fuck, Misha said she hasn’t even been responding to his incessant emails about GISH.”

I looked at my boots and sighed a little. "I'm sure I'm just overreacting. Seeing trouble because I want it to be there. She's probably MIA because she's busy and she's spending all her extra focus on him."

Jared smiled and patted my shoulder. "That's the most introspective, clear-headed thing you've said since Atlanta. Maybe you will get through this with your life intact."

He walked out as the workmen handed me a new remote and asked if I needed anything else before they left. I shook my head and thanked them. Only one person could give me what I needed...and I couldn’t call her.

~~~

I spent the next few days thinking I was getting better. I was improving. I was talking to Dee again, video chatting every day and not wanting to ignore her existence completely. I wasn't drowning in bitterness anymore. I was gonna be okay, I could feel it.

Until Y/n drove her little Nissan rental car onto the lot. I was talking to the mechanics about a scene with the Impala when she got out and looked around. My throat went dry and I had to force myself to look away as she greeted several of the crew on her way to wardrobe. I excused myself from my conversation and...followed her, but not in a creeper way. I just wanted to see her.

Yeah, I know that seems creepy. That's why I didn't answer when Jared walked up to stand next to me as I was staring at the door of the makeup trailer, waiting for her to come out.

"What'cha doin'?" I just shrugged. "Y/n's in there?"

"Yep."

"I don't need to tell you how creepy it is for you to be standing out here like a stalker, do I?"

"Nope."

"Good, then I won’t. Go run lines with Alex or something, I'm gonna go say 'hi'." I nodded, not watching as he walking away. I just turned and headed for Alex's trailer so I wouldn't be tempted to stick around. I didn’t run lines, though, just let the kid provide a distracting conversation for me as I waiting for call so I could interrogate Jared.

He immediately seemed on the defense. "I didn't have a lot of time to talk to her. She was due on Second Unit so I only had a few minutes, but we're gonna get dinner tonight so I can talk to her a bit more in depth."

"Okay, but how'd she seem? She seem good? Did you ask her about Tom? Is she happy?" I whispered furiously as we headed for the motel set.

He hesitated. He fucking hesitated. "I...don't know. I'm sure she is but…"

"But what?" I demanded, stopping in my tracks.

He ran his hand through his hair and rubbed the back of her neck. "She didn't want the Facebook post. We all guessed that but...the way she excused it...I don’t know, Ackles, it just seemed...off. She said something about him making decisions for her because she doesn't make good decisions. It just seemed...wrong. I don't know exactly why but...I'm gonna get to the bottom of it at dinner, okay? I'm sure it's nothing but bad wording on her part."

My mind went rampaging through options but I didn't really have any. There was nothing I could do. Even if there was something wrong, what could I do? Absolutely nothing.

"Jared...if she's not happy with him, you have to convince her-"

"I'm not going to convince her of shit, dude. If she's not happy, she will figure it out eventually. She's smart and she got out of her bad marriage and she can get herself out of this if it's bad."

I didn't bring up the fact that Nate fucking cheated on her and left her. What would be the point? I just went to work. Had to focus on something.

~~~

"She swears she's happy," Jared said as we ate our breakfast burritos the next day.

"And do you believe her? What about Tom making decisions for her?"

"She's letting him make decisions because she thinks he's helping her."

"Yeah? How does telling the world about their relationship when she said she didn't want him to help her?"

Jared shrugged. "He's helping with her career and Nova, too, apparently. Did you know Nate is trying to get full custody? She's under a lot of stress. That's probably what I was picking up on yesterday, ya know."

I rolled my eyes. I remembered Nate threatening to go after custody but I didn't think he'd actually do it. "Bet he just wants child support out of her. He doesn't give a fuck about that little girl."

"Yeah, but...it is what it is. And it's part of why she's off. Honestly, I also think she's afraid to be too close with the Family because they are all such good friends with you and staying close to them...puts her in your circle."

I scoffed. "What, like I'm gonna make things hard for her if she's hanging with fuckin' Misha or something?"

"No, not intentionally, but hearing about you, knowing that they don't know, having to act like nothing happened between you...that's gotta be as hard for her as it is for you."

I chewed on my bottom lip for a moment before sighing. "I didn't mean for this to happen."

"Of course not, but it did. She's dealing with her end of it the best she can. You have to do the same. You getting over it might allow her to come back comfortably. You ever think of that? That maybe the reason she can't be around you has nothing to do with Tom and has everything to do with her not being able to deal with the guilt and the angry looks you give her and how everything exploded."

He was right. I wanted Tom to be the reason she pulled away because then it wouldn't be my fault but it was. Everything was my fault.

"Oh, and she has her first late show appearance this week. I'm gonna give her a shout out on Twitter. A good friend would do the same. It's a Marvel thing, press for her Anthology."

"So Tom'll be there too," I guessed, bitterly.

"And Anthony Mackey and Sebastian Stan, yeah," he confirmed. "Look, you don't have to watch it. Just try to be supportive."

“If I’m gonna advertise for their press junket, I’m gonna fuckin’ watch the thing...for her.”

“You remember that Tom is all about the PDA, right? You might see something you don’t want to see.” Jared was trying to be helpful. I know he was, but...it just seemed like salt in my wounds.

“Yeah. I’m a big boy. I can handle it. Thanks.”

“If you say so, Ackles,” he said, before walking away.

~~~

I made sure I had a stiff drink in my hand when I sat down in my trailer to watch Y/n on Colbert. A double of the best whiskey I owned. I knew that it was going to be a long night. I figured an angry fit, maybe an ugly cry, was on the books. Instead, I felt a bit numb as I watched the Marvel crew walk onstage. Tom was holding her hand and they were both smiling so fucking bright. She looked so excited to be on that stage and so...good. I wanted to be upset about the way Tom sat right beside her and put a possessive hand on her arm, but I was so lost in her eyes and the smile she got when Colbert greeted her and congratulated her on her first late night appearance that I couldn't think much of anything.

But then Stephen said, "We gotta talk about that bombshell Tom dropped last week." and she (and Mackey) immediately said, "No, we don't." She didn't want to talk about it. She still wanted her goddamn privacy!

But the host pressed. Of course he did. It was newsworthy, after all. “Come on. It’s an important topic. You two met on set?”

She sighed and I think I saw her roll her eyes a bit. "Fine. I’ll play. Yes, we met on set. I flew down from Vancouver and I was trying really hard to be invisible. Before Supernatural, I was really good at that whole wallflower thing. Tom noticed me right away, so I guess my chameleon circuit is blown." I didn't get the joke but some of the people in the audience did because there was a smattering of laughter. "And that's how you find the Whovians," she commented with a little smile. "Anyway, Tom commented on my character's name and then he asked me for drinks. A couple days later, I invited him to sing with me at a convention and we...haven't spent much time apart since."

Tom's face contorted a bit and then he scoffed at her. "That's amazing."

She looked down at her lap, something between shame and guilt on her face. "What is?"

"That a woman so adept at the written word could take all of the poetry out of our first encounter." She bit her lip as he turned to look at Colbert. "Her hair caught my eye. Her natural coloring, not the dye job she did to cover her character’s ginger hair. It's this Neopolitan shade, with highlights of light and lowlights of brilliant caramel, but as I passed her the sun hit her just right to showcase the firey red strands that are usually hidden. When I saw that the hue of her eyes matched the brilliance of her smile, I knew I had to get to know her. When she got so shy the first time I spoke her name…" He turned back to her and I knew she was blushing, even through the TV screen. Even from a few thousand miles away, I could see what she was hiding behind her hair. "Like she's doing right now...I determined that I would get her out on the town, have a few drinks, and learn everything I could about her. By the time we took the stage for karaoke, I was absolutely taken with her."

Stephen leaned forward, trying to see Y/n. “And keeping it quiet for the last, what 3 months, that was really her idea?”

Tom nodded. “Definitely. I’m not a man that keeps quiet about his affections.”

“He’s a big fan of the PDA.” Sebastian Stan chuckled. “You remember the Taylor Swift shirt?”

“And you’re not?” Colbert asked. That was a loaded question. I knew she would have loved PDA with someone she wanted everyone to see her with. She took it to a self-deprecating place, though.

"I mean, look, I'm almost thirty and that is ancient by Hollywood’s standards for women and I'm just now getting started in show business." If thirty is ancient, what the hell was I to her? "A year ago, I was a cashier or running a forklift at a Sam's Club back home. I'm not used to everyone knowing every little detail of my life. I'm not used to anyone caring to know about me." She shook her head. "I knew this relationship would be something people would be all over if they knew about it. I mean...he's Tom Hiddleston and I'm just...who the hell am I? Nobody. We've been together a few months. We're still in that early infatuation stage where everything’s great and there’s never been any problems. We haven't even had our first fight yet. In my experience, things can fall apart pretty quickly as soon as you're out of the honeymoon stage."

"That's not true." I hated how Tom smiled at her. "We fought over the Facebook post."

"That wasn’t a fight, Tom. The knock-down, drag-out arguments I had with my ex...those were fights."

Colbert seemed to remember his place as host and leaned forward again. "So when he said that you were giving him the opportunity to leave without anyone capitalizing on your drama, that was…"

“It was totally true, but it’s more complicated than that. It wasn’t like I was rooting for him to leave me, I just…I mean, look at him. He’s Tom freakin’ Hiddleston." I rolled my eyes at her words. "His last girlfriend was Taylor Swift, who has like 8 inches of height on me and millions of dollars and a squad of supermodel best friends. I’m short and chubby and have a kid. It would’ve been unreasonable and, frankly, arrogant to assume he would stick around. How could I possibly know there was something lovable about me?”

She said that like a joke but I wanted to scream. She was being so mean to herself. She was being downright horrible. Why wasn't Tom disagreeing? Why wasn't he building her up? Why did she seem more torn down and broken than when I  met her?

“Anyway, why don’t we talk about the dang movie?" she volunteered, obviously tired of being the center of attention. "Which I had very little to do with so you can talk to Monsieurs Stan and Mackey, who’ve been sitting there annoyed with the relationship talk.”

“I don’t know about ‘annoyed’,” Anthony disputed with a smile.

“Don’t lie, Mack," Sebastian said, chuckling. “No, we’re good. She’s cool. I mean, we just met her in the green room 'cause she’s been forcing Tom to keep her a secret from us, too, but she seems genuine.”

“I’m gonna point out that she’s an actor, too, though. We’re well-versed in hiding our crazy. Also, she’s from the South. Southern women are either the most genuine chicks you’ll ever meet…or the ultimate in crazy.” Anthony Mackey obviously knows his Southern women.

“I’ve met her family. If she’s hiding any craziness, it’s directly resultant from them,” Tom responded.

Colbert's eyes went wide just like mine did. “Oh, insulting the family on national television, not a good idea."

“Nah, it’s okay. They know they’re crazy," Y/n covered. "And we’ll go with Anthony’s assessment. I got damage, and I use my acting chops to hide a lot of it, but…I’m…”

Tom must've sensed her floundering because he reached out to take her hand again. “She’s amazing. She’s intelligent, she’s funny, she’s gorgeous and better than all that, she’s an unbelievable mother." He got to meet Nova. He got to meet Nova and I only ever saw her through a video chat. Why did that burn? "Her daughter, Nova, is an absolute dream and it’s square on this woman’s shoulders.”

She looked uncomfortable with the praise. Maybe she wasn't used to hearing it from him...or maybe just not in so public a venue. “Okay, that’s not true. Nova is awesome but I can’t take full credit on that. Also, please let some other topic rule the time we got left, please. This is a MCU promo, not a Y/n promo.”

“As long as you’re not giving credit to anyone who doesn’t actually deserve it.” He almost growled that one. He seemed to have a problem with her past. Her parents, her ex...only Nova seemed to be spared.

“Please, Stephen, ask about the Winter Soldier sequence," she begged.

She sat silently through the rest of the segment as the others spoke enthusiastically about their characters and the rumored TV show for the Falcon and Winter Soldier and the growth of both characters in relation to Steve Rogers. She kept her eyes on her lap, or on her hand clasped in Tom's.

Something wasn't right. There was something very wrong.

I wasn’t with her. I wasn’t lifting her up. He was failing her...but there was nothing I could do about it. I picked up my whiskey and downed it in one gulp.

[mlovesstories]

Feeling the Burn Part 1

Warning: housefire, hospital, burns, cussing, foster care, police, drunk parents

Words: 4300

Summary: YN works at FBBC, and Danneel finds out she could use some support after being in a terrible situation. 

AN- Thanks to @a-magey​ and @luci-in-trenchcoats​! 

Tag List

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Masterlist of Masterlists

YN walked down the stairs.  She took in the scene before her.  Her dad threw something across the room in anger.  Her mom retaliated with yelling at him to keep doing it, and she threw something back, glass breaking across his knee.  

“Ow!” He bent down to cater to his leg.  When they both realized YN was standing on the stairs.  

“Oh,” Julie scowled.  “The princess is here,” she slurred her words.  YN scrunched up her nose.  To get out of the house, she told her parents, “I’m going to work.  I’ll see you later.”

_________

“Hi, YN.” Danneel greeted the girl during her shift at the brewery.  

“Hi Dee.  How are you?”

“You okay?  You look tired.”

“Oh,” YN sputtered. “Yeah, I’m great, thanks!” YN tried to hide her nervousness.  “Oh, another kid puked, excuse me,” YN sighed.  

Later, Danneel pulled YN aside.  

“I saw your backpack and a blanket on top of the couch.  Are you- are you spending the night here?”

“Oh, no ma’am.  Of course not,” she laughed nervously.

“YN…”

“Gino said it was okay…” YN picked at her fingers.  “I’m sorry.”

“I’m not mad, sweetie.  I just want to make sure that you have people to take care of you.”

“Yeah, I’m fine.” YN shrugged.  

“How come you are spending the night here?  Don’t you live with your parents?”

“I need to go,” YN ran off to the game area of the property.  

_____

“Hey,” Jensen walked through the garage door entrance to greet his wife.  Danneel stayed quiet.  “What’s wrong?”

“I need to talk to you.”

“Uh oh, you breaking up with me?” Jensen laughed.  His wife gave no reaction.  

“I can’t- I don’t know how to explain this.  It’s nothing bad.”

“Okay,” Jensen sat down next to her.  

“I went to the brewery today. You know YN? One of the servers?”

“Umm, the teenager? She oversees the play area, right?”

“Yeah.  She told me something interesting today.” Danneel turned to face her husband.

“Sweet kid.  What happened?”

“I asked her why she was staying late.  She said she didn’t have anywhere else to go to finish her homework.”

“What?”

“She told me she had a deal with Gino so that she could spend the night in the breakroom.”

Jensen was quiet for a moment.  

“How long has she been doing that?” Jensen sucked in a breath.

“She wouldn’t tell me.”

“She doesn’t have any type of support or anything?”

“YN wouldn’t say.  She seemed very ashamed.”

“Dee, she can’t stay there.” Jensen said plainly.

“I know. I want to help her, but I don’t know how.  She wouldn’t tell me anything.” 

_________

“Am I in trouble?” YN asked.  She sat on one of the bench tables with Danneel and Jensen after the crowds had gone home.

“Oh, no! No. Of course not.  You’re one of our best employees.” Danneel smiled.  “We just wanted to talk about the conversation that we had yesterday.  Jensen and I want to help you if we can.”

“I’m okay.” YN rang her hands together.  

“We know that,” Jensen said.  “We just want to make sure that you’re taken care of and your needs are being met.”

“Please don’t fire me.  I don’t want you to hate me.” YN wiped a tear from her face, feeling as if she had been found out.

“Sweetheart, we don’t hate you.  We love that you work here, and we want you to stay.” Danneel offered her a side hug. “On one condition.”

“What’s the condition?”

“Tell us what happened? At least some of it. Please?”

“No thank you.  Here,” YN slipped off her badge and put it on the table, defensive.

“YN-”

“Thank you for the job.”

“Where are you going to sleep?” Jensen stood to block her path.

“Umm,” YN pursed her lips.

Jensen asked where her parents were.  YN slowly explained that her parents kicked her out a few weeks ago during a drunken disagreement.  

“I asked Gino if I could sleep here because my car isn’t comfy.  I’ll just sleep in my car, it’s fine.  I have some friends who don’t know, but maybe they can let me park my car in the driveway.  I’ll figure it out.”

“How old are you?”

“Sixteen,” YN answered.  

“You need a bed, YN.” Danneel pulled the girl to sit back down.  “Give us a minute.  Why don’t you go grab a soda?”

The teenager moved to the refrigerator and pulled out a vanilla soda before walking to the stockroom.  

“What are we going to do?”

Before they could finish their conversation, YN tried to sneak out the side entrance.  

“YN, don’t even try.  Come here,” Danneel motioned to the table they were sitting at.  

YN slumped over and walked to stand across from them.  

“I don’t mean to cause trouble.”

“You’re not! If anything, you’re helping us.”

“What?”

“You’re an employee. We care about our employees.”

“Thank you.”

“Come spend the night tonight. Just so we know that you aren’t somewhere where you could get hurt.”

“No, I can’t.”

“Yes, come on, we close in five minutes.  Go do your homework.  We’ll leave in half an hour.” Jensen told her directly.  

She gave in.

“Yes, sir.” YN threw her backpack over her shoulder and went into the breakroom.  

“You ready, YN?” Danneel walked into the break room, finding YN hunched over to work on her homework.

“Yeah. Thanks.”

“If you’re okay with it, Jensen is going to drive your car and I’ll drive you back to our house. That way you won’t have to worry about getting lost.”

“Okay,” she shrugged.

When they got to the Ackles’, YN was given a key to the guest house. “If you need anything, text me. Here’s my number. Drive safe to school tomorrow. Sleep well,” Danneel hugged YN and sent her on her way.

_____

YN drove from the Ackles’ home to school, leaving the key under the mat on the back porch.

YN:

Thanks for letting me spend the night.  Key is under the mat.

Danneel:

When your shift is over you better come back.  At least until we can find something for you.

YN:

Ma’am…

Danneel:

Don’t ma’am me.  Your butt better be in the guest house by 8pm.  I’m going to check.  I’ll take away employee privileges.  Ya know, like that soda you like. ;)

YN:

Okay.  Promise.  Thanks.

______

“No! I’m not coming home!” YN slammed her phone down onto the side table.  She jumped when she heard a knock on the guest house door.

“Uh- Am I interrupting something?” Danneel smiled after she stepped inside.  

“Umm.”

“Price of admission, remember?” The older female smiled.

“Okay,” YN ducked her head and walked to a couch and practically fell into it.  “Mom is either high or drunk. And angry.  She’s an angry drunk.  That’s why I left.  Well, and they sorta kicked me out when they blacked out.  I told them I wasn’t coming back.”

“Yikes.  That sounds like a lot.”

“Yeah.”

“Do you hear sirens?” Danneel asked, turning away from the girl.  Her phone dinged, indicating a text.  

Jensen

Police here, come here. Bring YN.

Danneel

Okay.  Be right there.  

“We need to go into the house.  Come on.”

The girls entered the main house and met Jensen in the front entry.  

“Ms. YLN?” A police officer stepped toward YN.  She backed up to stand next to Danneel.  “Your parents have reported you missing.  They said that you won’t come home.”

“They’re drunks.  Who wants to live with that?” YN snapped.  Danneel shushed her.  “Did you encounter them today?  Let me guess, they were drunk?”

“Please come with us,” the detective walked toward the door.  

“Why?” YN stood still.

“You are now in the custody of the state.”

“What?  No, I’m fine.”

“I can see that you’re fine.  But there are regulations and procedures when a child is taken out of the family structure.  Please don’t make this difficult.” The detective tried to guide her out.  

“You’re telling me I will have to live with other people?”

“If you don’t have anyone else we can place you with, yes.”

YN looked away.  

“No one who would care.”

“Can she stay with us?” Danneel chimed in.

“Unfortunately no.  At least not tonight.  She has to be with us and we process paperwork.”  

“Can I go to school tomorrow?” YN looked at the man.

“It’s not-”

“I’ll take her.  I’ll pick her up from wherever.  She can’t miss school, the one constant in her life,” Danneel defended the girl. .

“Hey,” Jensen butted in.  She ain’t going anywhere,” he looked to his wife.  She nodded.  “We’ll take her.”

YN’s eyes went wide.

“No, you can’t.  You don’t have to.” YN gasped at Jensen’s statement.

“We’ll see,” the police officer said.  “Grab your things for the next few days if you have it.” He exited the house.

“Do you have your phone and charger?” Jensen asked.

She checked her pocket.

“Phone, but not charger.  It’s in the guest house.”

“Go get it.  And your school stuff!” Danneel yelled after her.  

________

YN was placed in a crisis shelter for the night.  It was midnight before she could relax enough to fall asleep.  Somehow, she got her own room for which she was thankful.  

Her phone beeped her alarm at 5:30am the next day.  The staff at the shelter showed YN where the cereal was before she got ready for school.  Danneel picked her up for school an hour and a half later.  

“Hey, YN.  Tired?”

“Yeah,” YN climbed into the SUV.  

“Take a nap.  The school is kind of far anyway.”  Danneel looked over to find YN already leaning against the SUV wall.  Danneel sighed, sad for the girl.  

The detective picked YN up from school.  

“Where to, homewrecker?” YN stomped toward him.  

“I got your stuff from the shelter.  The Ackles family is waiting for you.  Let’s go,” he said plainly.

YN sighed, relieved.

When they arrived at the house, YN was grateful that her car had not been moved.  She grabbed the key from under the mat and started to bring her things back into the guest house.  

“Wait,” the officer stopped her.  

“What?  You already ruined my life.  What else can I do to make my life worse, huh?” YN smarted off.

“Stop.  Let’s let the Ackles’ know you’re here.  We have some paperwork to go over.”

YN rolled her eyes.  He ignored her and knocked on the front door of the main house.  A maid answered the door.  She moved out of the way, and she took some of YN’s things out of her hands.  

“Thank you.”

“Of course, Miss,” the maid responded.  

“Hey, YN.” Danneel entered the foyer.  She wrapped her arms around the girl. “Go get some water, I’m sure you’re parched.  Make a sandwich too.  Or anything you want, kiddo.”

YN dropped her items off to the side next to Danneel’s purse and entered the kitchen.  

“Hi, YN,” Jensen stood up from sitting on a stool at the island.  

“Please, no more hugs.  Can I get some food, please?  I didn’t have lunch.”

“Absolutely.  Anything you want that‘s in there.” Jensen made sure to stay still, fighting his instinct to comfort the girl.  YN found the ingredients to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  

YN’s eyes went wide.  

“What?” Jensen saw her freeze.  

“I forgot about work! I’m so sorry.  I meant-”

“With everything you got going on, I think we can work something out,” Jensen chuckled.

“But if I don’t work-”

“I’ll make sure you get paid.  Don’t worry.”

YN took a deep breath.  Danneel walked into the kitchen and motioned for Jensen to come into the living room.  

“Eat your food and hang out for a second,” Jensen walked past YN.

The detective explained that they were considered kinship placement, and that he needed some forms filled out.  Once that was done, he let them know that child services would be checking in later on.  YN walked into the room as he left.  She took a deep breath.  

“You’re okay,” Jensen said evenly. Without warning, she ran into his arms. She sucked in a breath and held it without realizing it.  Freezing, she stood like a statue with her arms around him.  “It will be okay,” he whispered into her hairline.  “That asshole is gone.”

“Why don’t you stay in the house with us?” Danneel offered. “Jensen’a not here half the time, and I’d like to see you more often to know you’re okay.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want to bother-“

“You wouldn’t, sweetie. Trust me. You’re the least bothersome person on the property!” She laughed. “Why don’t you go do your homework in peace and then I’ll call you for dinner?”

“Yeah. Thanks. I might sneak in a nap too. I’m exhausted.”

—————

“Hey, YN,” Jensen walked into the brewery while it was closed.  “Homework?”

“I got used to doing it here,” YN shrugged.  “Do you want me to leave?  I can do it back at the house.”

“No, no.  We’re going to have a meeting.  As long as that doesn’t bother you, you can stay.”

“No, it’s fine.  Don’t mind me.” YN looked down at her work and started writing.  

“That’s a lot of writing.”

“Don’t have a computer.”

Jensen silently walked away quickly and came back with a laptop.  

“I’m not using it right now.  Type your paper.  It’s connected to the printer in Gino’s office.”

“Wow.  Thank you.” She accepted it knowing he wouldn’t take a refusal.  

“No problem, kid.”

______

“I like the new shirts.  This graphic is hard to read though,” Danneel picked up one piece of clothing before laying it down on the table to see it better.  “I don’t know,” she sighed.  

“YN!” Gino called for the teenager across the room.  She looked up at him.  “Come here for a minute.”

With wide eyes, she slowly walked toward the group.  The girl crossed the dining area.  

“Which shirt do you like the best?” He motioned to the items on the table.  She froze out of nervousness.  “No need to be scared.  Which one would you choose for your uniform, let’s say?”

“That one,” YN said.  She then recoiled, feeling ashamed of how fast she reacted.  

“Why?”

“It’s simple, and you can read it.” YN looked away.  

“Go put it on real quick.”  Danneel picked it up and tossed it to her.

“Oh, it’s soft.” YN said under her breath.  She took it and changed in the restroom.  When she walked out, the team immediately smiled.  

“Agree, looks good,” Jensen said.  “You’re right.  I like the design and the font too.  Keep that one.  We have a few extra for samples.”

“Thanks, Jensen.” YN beamed.  

I love this shirt.  I love this family.  They make me feel better.

“YN-” Gino caught her attention. She snapped her eyes to him.  “You can go finish your homework.  I think we’re almost finished anyway.”

YN shyly looked at the floor and shuffled her feet back to her assignment on the table.  

A few minutes later, YN heard her name again. She peered around the computer screen.  

“We’re locking up, come on.  It’s getting late.” Danneel smiled.  “Bring the laptop.  Use it.  We only use it for random stuff anyway.”

“Thanks,” YN pulled it into her chest after throwing her backpack over her shoulder.  

“Sweetie, you look exhausted.”

“Gotta study.  And work.  Makes a girl sleepy,” YN sighed.  

“New rule at our house, you work half the time that you do now,” Danneel guided her out of the building.  

“What?”

“You work four hours a day during the week, right?”

“Yeah.”

They arrived at their vehicles.

“Leave your car here. We’ll stick in one of the garages.  You’re too tired. Tomorrow is Saturday anyway.”

“I’m okay-”

“I know your parents didn’t do this much. Looking out for you.  But I’m telling you, you’re tired and compromised.  Please just get in the truck,” Danneel said plainly.  “I’ll move your car.”

“Okay.” YN slowly put her things in the truck and climbed in, yawning.  Jensen took the driver’s seat and waited for Danneel.  

“You okay, kiddo?”

“Tired,” she yawned again.  “But yeah. Ready for bed.  Busy Friday night. Lots of kids everywhere in the play area tonight.”

“Let’s go home then. It’s already midnight.  Sleep in tomorrow, okay?”

“Homework,” YN whined.

“Give me your backpack,” Jensen held his hand out.  

She raised an eyebrow at him.  

“You don’t get this back until ten tomorrow morning.  Get your stuff out of it that you want.  Computer and your work stay in it and are coming with me.”

The older one waited until she fished out her phone, charger, and headphones before passing it to him.  

“Okay, Jensen,” she laid her head against the door.  Before he knew it, Danneel was in the car, and YN was slumped forward, asleep.

“That kid,” Danneel looked into her visor mirror.  “She works herself to the bone.”

“Yeah.  I took that from her.  She was planning on getting up early, but I told her no.  That she can’t start her work until mid-morning, give her some time to rest.”

“Good.  I’m sure she has had plenty of sleepless nights.”

When they arrived home, Danneel shook the girl awake.  YN jumped, the seatbelt stopping her from going anywhere.

HUH?”

“Relax.  It’s just me.  We’re back.  Go inside. Get some sleep, okay?” Danneel slowly hugged YN.

“Okay, she whispered back YN used the key to unlock the front door to the guest house.  “Good night,” YN waved.  

________.

Danneel:

GOOD MORNING! Come into the house for some waffles.

YN:

I’m okay.

Danneel:

I will bring Jensen and we will bring you over here if we don’t see you in five minutes.  Wear your PJs.

YN:

Coming.

YN walked in from the backyard.  She quietly waved to the family and ran a hand over her hair.  After using the restroom, she entered the kitchen again.  A stack of waffles towered on a plate at the table.  

“Those are for you, eat up.” Jensen followed behind her with his own plate of food.  

______

Jensen gave YN her backpack to start her homework.

“Stay here,” Danneel cleaned off the table.  “You’ve been on your own for a while.  Hang out.  You don’t have to be alone all the time.  And you didn’t eat a lot of your food.  You feeling okay?”

“Yes, ma’am,” YN sat down after trying to leave the house.  

“I know you’re lying.  You’re only this respectful when you try to hide things.  It’s okay.” Realizing again that YN had been neglected by her parents, the mom said, “you’re not used to breakfast, are you?”

“No,” YN admitted shyly.  

“Are you hungry?”

“I’m okay.”

“That’s not what I asked.” Danneel put down her dish towel and faced the girl.  “Forget about the food.  Are you hungry?”

“Not really.  I guess my body got used to not eating this early. I’ll be hungry in about an hour.”

“Okay.  Go clean up and come back in an hour then,” Danneel smiled and turned back to her dishes.  

“Okay, be back in a few,” YN gave a relieved sigh.  Smiling as she exited, she silently thanked whoever was in charge that she knew this family.  

In just that amount of time, YN stepped foot in the kitchen again.  A whole new plate of warm waffles were on the table.  She sat down and ate them.  The house was quiet, but she knew they were home.  YN was startled when Jensen walked quickly through the kitchen to their driveway.  

“Sorry, YN.  There is an emergency at the brewery, and he had to go deal with it,” Danneel entered the room after Jensen slammed the door shut.  “He didn’t mean to scare you.”

“It’s fine,” she settled back into her seat.  

“So, tired?” Danneel sat across from YN to drink her coffee.  

“Yeah.  It’s kind of a constant though.”

“Not anymore.  You need to rest.”

“No offense, but you already cut my hours.  I’ll be making less now, and I can’t pay for my car without the money, plus pay for gas or anything else I need.”

“Jensen didn’t tell you?”

“Tell me what?” YN put her fork down.  

“We’re paying you as if you were working those hours.  Your paycheck won’t change.”

“What? I work for my money.  I don’t get it for doing nothing,” YN sat back in her seat, trying to understand what was happening.  

“You’ll earn it.”

“I’m so confused.”

“When was the last time you did anything as a family?  Or when they told you to go to bed early, or eat your veggies?’

“A while.  Why?”

“That’s how you’ll earn the money, then.  By listening to us and being part of our family.  Even though it’s just me and him, you’re still allowed to be treated like a family member.”

“Umm. Okay,” YN shrugged.  She picked up her fork and took a bite of her food.  “I appreciate it, but I kind of don’t understand?”

“You’ll see,” Danneel nodded.  “Now, I noticed that you get scared when there is a loud noise.  Is there anything else that makes you nervous?”

“No..”

“YN,” Danneel sighed, begging for the girl to answer her question.  

“Coming up from behind me and yelling my name.  My dad does that when I’m in trouble.”

“Okay, we’ll work on that, then.”

“Thank you,” YN said with a mouth full of waffle.  She giggled as a piece of whipped cream slid out of her mouth and dropped onto her plate.  Danneel laughed.  

“In the future, please don’t talk with your mouth full.” Danneel winked at the girl and took her coffee cup to rinse it out in the sink.  “You doing anything fun today?”

“My friends kinda ditched me.  I think I may just take a nap.  I have homework, but it’s actually all extra credit due at the end of the week.”

“Why did they ditch you?” Danneel sat back down.

“I’m not cool anymore.  I’m a poor kid whose parents can’t keep it together.  I don’t go to a rich school or anything where everyone has perfect lives, but they ignore me now.  No offense.”

Danneel laughed.  

“None taken, I get it. It doesn’t sound like you have been able to rest in some time now.  I think a nap is a good idea.  We have to go to the brewery later.  Why don’t you take a nap and then we can go pick up your car at the brewery after?”

“Yeah.  Was something wrong at the brewery?  How come he left so fast?”

“Some idiot vandalized a sign.  Nothing too crazy.”

________

While the girls were talking, Danneel’s rang to the tune of Crazy Love.  

YN smirked. Jensen.

“What’s up, babe?”

“The garage is burned down! It happened so fast!” Jensen spat out the words quickly.

“While you were there?”

YN’s attention snapped to the conversation.  

“I was moving YN’s car out of the garage so that she could get it later, and then there was this ploom of smoke outta nowhere,” he started coughing.  “I’m safe, but the car is toast, fire and police are here.  So is Gino.  They’re making me go to the hospital for precautionary reasons, but I’m  fine,” Jensen gagged. “I’m fine.”

After Danneel figured out what hospital the emergency crew was taking him to, she and YN drove quickly to see Jensen.  

“Is he okay? Why would someone do that?”

“Not sure.  Jensen said he was fine, but he says that all the time,” Danneel shook her head.  “Let’s go see him.”

When they arrived, the two ladies ran into the hospital lobby.  

“Jensen Ackles, please.  I’m his wife, and this is his daughter,” Danneel begged, eyes tearing up.  “He was brought here.”

“One moment, ma’am.” The attendant looked for Jensen’s file on the computer.  Danneel bounced her leg up and down in nervousness with YN by her side. “He just went into surgery, ma’am.

“Surgery?” YN looked at Danneel.  “He was fine when we talked to him on the phone, miss.  He was coughing, but that was it.” Danneel stood there, frozen.  “Danneel, sit down.” The younger one took her arm as Danneel stared straight ahead in shock.

“Surgery?” Danneel processed.  

When Danneel was seated, YN walked back over to the lady behind the desk.  

“What happened?”

“I just work the front desk, miss.”

“My dad is in there.  I don’t know what is going on with him, and I need to so that I can tell my mom, because she is freaking out,” YN growled, faking her relationship with the Ackles’.  

“He was burned in the fire.”

“Jensen didn’t say anything about that on the phone.”

“He was probably in shock, miss.  The doctor will be out to talk with you and your mom when they have an update,” the lady smiled at YN.  

“Okay,” YN slowly turned around to face Danneel.  Her expression changed when YN walked toward her.  “He got burned, Dee,” YN whispered.  

_______

“Ackles?”

YN’s head turned to see a man in a white coat walking toward her and Danneel.  

“Dee?  Wake up,” YN tapped her shoulder.  “Dee.” Danneel rubbed her eyes and popped her neck from the uncomfortable position she was in.  

“Hi there, my name is Dr. Jones.  I wanted to let you know that Mr. Ackles is recovering from his procedure.”

“Why were you operating on him in the first place?”

“Well, we think he was using his hands to get out of whatever situation he was in, so his arms and hands suffered burns.  I think he will make a full recovery, but it will take a while.”

Danneel put her head into her hands.  

“He is alive, Mrs. Ackles.  Please try to focus on that.” The doctor quickly walked away to attend to nurses asking for his attention.  

“Jensen will be okay,” YN sighed, talking to herself.  

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[impala1967dwinchester]

Jensen Ackles- Like Always

Pairing: Jensen A. x Fem!Reader

Pov: Reader

Warnings: FLUFF, SFW, Cuteness.

Summary: When Jensen gets back from a long convention all the reader wants to do is play with his long hair.

WC: 590

A/n- @firefly-graphics for dividers, This is for @anon, hope you enjoy. Also no disrespect to Danneel and Jensen I love them, but for this fiction they aren't together.

Main Master List // Jensen A. Master List // Request Master List

Jensen had already been away for so long now. He'd left during the start of winter here in Vancouver. Starting getting ready to film his new star show. "The Boys" is something that honestly both of us were scared of at first.

But eventually, everything fell right back into place. No longer the big hotshot in his own tv show. Jensen took the back seat enjoying the fact that he didn't really have to do much of anything. Besides, call me every night, and grow his hair out. Something that I'd never seen. Besides photos, his mother was more than welcome to share them with me. His hair grew so long that it was starting to become a new thing that fans were falling in love with.

Honestly, I could see why. It framed his face better and made him look even more handsome. every night we'd chat until I fell asleep I missed him dearly. Every night I dreamed of just him being home and in my arms again and my hands dragging through that beautiful dirty blonde hair.

My surprise came home to me last night. A large boutique of flowers. A handwritten note from him.

"I'll be home soon enough my dear, I can't wait to be there. XOXO." A simple note as ever he made words as simple as those become much more than they ever meant.

I sat down the note and fruit basket along with the flower meant Jensen wasn't too far from home. I clicked through the tv, selecting a cheesy romantic comedy to fall asleep to. I let the plotline and crappy lines take me away and into my dreams.

Where all I imagined was the love of life in my arms that pine wood scent in the air. The warm after-effect he left when he'd get up to get something from the kitchen.

It was always like magic when I'd dream about Jensen and I'd wake to kisses from him, or his hands detangling my messy bedhead. I awake to the man I loved kneeling in front of me. A heartwarming smile I was greeted with sent butterflies into my stomach.

"Hellow sweetheart." He said to me with a kiss on my forehead. "Baby, you're home!" I said excitedly. "Your hair!" That was my next comment. He laughed softly.

Grabbing the blanket on the edge of the couch. He laid down, his head falling into my lap. "I missed you Y/n," Jensen said as he softly hummed. I smiled down at him, his fluttering eyes, and long eyelashes. "Would you run your fingers through my hair?" He asked.

My smile widen and I couldn't help but fall more in love with him. His child-like features beaming through. Freckles that burnt through his skin. "Of course baby," I said. Guiding my hand past his jaw, up to his cheek, and into his hairline.

Silk was what his hair felt like. Perfection in all the best ways. He sighed in delight. The small wrinkle lines on his forehead released and his rheumatic breathing came forth. He fell asleep as I guided my fingers through his hair over and over again. Not bothered by the silence of our apartment. Or by the heat that was radiating off the both of us.

I just lived in the moment, and for once it was all worth it. Worth it just to have my Jensen in my arms, just to be able to do the simplest thing for him by just gliding my fingers through his hair.

Posted on: 04/14/2022

Completed on: 04/10/2022

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Requests: @nicodarling @Onethirstyunicorn @silverose365

[kickingitwithkirk]

Paschal Moon

Summary: Jensen finds crossing the tracks isn’t always a bad thing

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Astronomer!Reader

Word Count: 2200

Warnings: some angst, really bad punning(sorry) divorce, cheating, innuendos, cursing, reader says shit like I do in real life🤣

Square Filled: @winchesterandbeyondbingo -midnight @spnmixedbingo -secret dating @spnaubingo -wet dream @j3bingo -camping @howbadcanitbebingo -cliche galore

*Moldavite

*no Beta-all mistakes are mine

*photos found online

It was Saturday night and once again Jensen found himself the proverbial third wheel.

Jared and Genevieve meant well, dragging him everywhere with them since his filing for divorce, wanting to keep him from brooding at home with a bottle when not with his kids.

And it wasn’t that he didn’t enjoy socializing, that wasn’t the problem, it was knowing it would be an evening filled with repetitive I'm so sorry and the look that sent him straight to the open bar first for many a shot nowadays.

Feeling the slight buzz he needed to deal, Jensen put on his game face and with another tumbler of liquid courage in hand made the rounds; chatting amicably with various groups, catching up with old friends.

Things were going pretty well until some dumbfuck with more alcohol than brains turned to Genevieve loudly blurting they’d heard the reason for the divorce was Danneel had been making the rounds with guy’s with more sizable assets..

That’s when her moose sized husband bellowed in the jerks face to shut their unprepossessing cake hole.

Jensen takes the momentary distraction to escape out a side door before he gives into the impulse and punches the sonuvabitch with the double entendre slammed it shut crossed over to the riverside railing and gripping it in both hands wrung it like a chicken neck.

The unexpected swish of fabric made Jensen shift his focus spying a glass half full of liquid being held out in front of him, “looks like you could use this more than me.”

He turns, finding himself gazing into the eyes of the tall drink of water he’d noticed throughout the evening.

Glancing at the glass again she laughed, “I’m not slipping you a mickey,” lifting said glass to her lips he watched her throat ungulate, making Jensen Jr. rise to attention.

“See Peaches, I’m not some crazy charity stalker.”

He took the glass and felt a spark as his fingers brushed hers, “thanks, I wasn’t actually thinking..that,” threw back the rest of the liquid appreciating the smooth slide down his throat, “it’s been a pretty shitty evening.”

“Preaching to the choir honey child. I’m here ‘cause my second cousin on my mama’s side girl broke up with him and now I know why.”

She bends over giving Jensen a fantastic view of her breasts artfully showcased in her cocktail dress retrieves a bottle, “that motherfucker thought he could pimp me out for a promotion!”

She points the bottle at him, “what the hell is it with people? That having a ring on it,” she grabs his left wrist holding it up so the lights glint off the band he hasn’t been able to remove yet, “means absofuckinglutely nothing?”

“Now you're preaching to the choir,” Jensen can’t keep the bitter note out of his voice as she refilled the glass, “my soon to be ex’s been doing that while I was working,” his shoulders dropped, feeling deflated.

“Holy shit, you’re the guy everyone is gossiping about! Is it true your wife’s been running around ‘cause you couldn’t find her clit with a map, GPS and a fucking bullseye paint on it? Hell, most gals just use a vibrator if they wanna get off that bad.”

There was no disguising his blushing this time, even the tips of his elfin ears felt hot and he’d swear they were glowing in the dim lighting as she continues, “or that your package is really,” she wriggled her pinky finger, “don’t get me wrong, no shame if you know how to use it.”

Jensen’s eyes widened in shock and she slapped her hand over her mouth, “oh fuck, I’m so sorry, my mouth doesn’t know how to stop once I get started, blame it on my upbringing.”

Jensen took a drink figuring he’d need a stiffener since there’s no telling what she’d say to his one word question, “upbringing?”

She grinned at him, “you know what they say, you can take the girl outta the trailer park..” Jensen's expression became bewildered, “yep, I’m that relative they always warned you about.”

“Little late with the warning sweetheart.”

She burst out laughing and Jensen found himself doing the same.

***

Later

They were sitting with their backs against the building working on another bottle she five finger discounted.

Here he was, a forty-three year old man normally in control ‘cause in his profession showing emotions that weren't scripted was a sign of weakness that could be exploited but this woman, whom he’s never met before, had upended his control, making him feel like he’s thirteen year old having his first crush, had him talking and laughing and before he knew it told her everything that’d actually happened.

“That sucks balls and not in the good way!”

“Kicker is she wants alimony.”

“But you caught her doing the beast with two backs..” Jensen hums in response taken another drink before handing her the glass.

“Peaches, I’m no lawyer but I’d say that ain’t fucking happening,” she refills the glass, “and no offense but your ex makes those whores back home look almost pious, they have the decency not to fuck in your bed..most of the time.”

Jensen rubbed his face, “I can’t believe I’ve told a complete stranger about my problems.”

“Sometimes it’s easier to unburden yourself to someone you don’t know.”

“I haven’t even told my family or Jared!”

“And Jared is?”

“The guy who has my back no matter what.”

“That’s probably why, you’re afraid that if he knows what really happened it'll diminish how he sees you.”

Jensen looked at her confused, “guys POV.. if I caught my wife fucking around in our marital bed saying it’s cause I couldn’t keep her satisfied in the sack, I’d not wanna discuss it either but I know it’s,” wiggles pinky again, “horseshit.”

“How..”

“You dress left..and I’ve never had a phone stand up to say hello.”

Jensen found himself stumbling to come up with some kind of coherent response.

“Ahh, come on Peaches, you know you’ve given a lotta people wet dreams about you and your alter ego.”

“Why do you keep calling me that?”

“Cause you’ve got the juiciest peach of an ass I’ve ever seen and I wouldn’t kick you outta bed for eating crackers,” she says winking at him.

“Jensen!” They both look up at a fuming Jared coming out the side door. “Fuck man, I’ve been looking all over for you, we’re ready to go,” heads towards them as a church’s bells ring twelve times.

“Well pooh, I was having fun,” she says as they stood up, “guess it’s time to leave the ball and for me to head back to the pumpkin patch.” She gives Jared a nod walking towards the open door.

“WAIT!” Jensen hollars and runs to her, “you can’t just leave this way..I don’t even know your name.”

“Give me your phone,” he pulls it out of his jacket pocket making her smirk seeing its size, enters her digits, “give me a ring if you ever cross the tracks Peaches,” winking at him she then disappears into the crowded room.

“Who was that?” Jared asked as Jensen glanced at her contact info.

“Cinderella.”

***

It took weeks of Jared’s continual nagging about getting back on the horse for Jensen to decide to call.

Yet he didn’t.

Another two weeks went by when Jared flat out told him to stop acting like a teenage girl made him whip out his phone and pull up her number before going to shut it off again when Jared snatched it and held it over his head out of Jensen’s reach making him squawk taps call.

Two rings and her voice came through the speaker.“Peaches, you’re slower than molasses in January crawling uphill giving a girl a holler.”

Jensen’s irritation with Jared mellowed hearing her voice, agreeing to meet Friday at a hole-in-the-wall for lunch where he wouldn’t be recognized.

Lunch became dinner, dinner became bar hopping which lead to sneaking into Blue Hole to go skinny dipping and doing things that would scare fish, detouring to Waffle House for chili around four in the morning, ends with him spending the weekend at her place.

***

Jensen was nervous. It didn’t happen often but tonight was extra special.

A few months back she’d bounded into his home excited about an upcoming celestial event and field trip her astronomy class was taking and she really, really, really wanted him to go even though they agreed on keeping their relationship secretive until his divorce was finalized.

It struck him that it'd be the perfect night to do something he’d literally been wanting to since their first date so he said yes while mentally making other arrangements for the night.

***

“Peaches, this isn’t the way to the observatory.”

“We’re not going there sweetheart.”

“I realize that Captain Obvious! What I want to know is wtf..are you trying to get me fired? I have a class..”

“That Dr. Carnegie is graciously covering.”

“Why is..what did you do Jensen?”

“I went to the head of your department,” she groaned, “and inquired if it was possible for someone else to supervise because I’d planned a special night with my girl.”

“What happened to us keeping on the DL? Carnegie is the biggest blabbermouth..everyone on the planet’s gonna know about us by morning!”

“We don’t have to anymore ‘cause my divorce was finalized this morning.”

“WHAT!” She indignantly squawked,”why the hell didn’t you tell me..”

Jensen bemusedly listens to her ongoing rant, picking up her hand kissing it’s back entwined their fingers as he drove on for another hour to Inks Lake State Park paying for an overnight camping permit.

“Since when do you camp out, ‘cause the one time I asked, you gave me stink face when I mentioned a tent.”

“Since the day you bounded in all excited, asking me to come with you and I wanted to make tonight special.”

She leaned over kissing his cheek, “thank you. I sincerely appreciate you compromising your creature comforts for me.”

Jensen scratched the back of his head, “well, we’re not technically camping out, I got an air mattress that fits in the truck bed.”

***

Jensen gaze’s up at the moon awash with a pink hue, “I know it's a yearly thing so what makes this one so special?” The question made her lift her head from the telescope’s eyepiece, an amused expression crossed her features taken in his reclining position on the air mattress in the moonlight.

“Are you trying to seduce me Mrs. Robinson? Or do you want me to paint you like one of those french girls?”

Jensen peers down at his unintentional position: one hand tucked behind his head, bowed legs splayed, one knee slightly bent, his other hand lying near the sliver of skin peaking out between his dark henley and low riding jeans.

She walks towards the truck, “what makes this years,” sets a foot on the back bumper, “so special,” grips the tailgate and hops over onto the mattress, “is the proximity of the moons orbit,” on her hands and knees crawls forward, “to the earth,” placing her hands on either side of his shoulders she straddles Jensen’s hips slowly sitting down, “is ultra close and..whatthehellisinyourpants!!”

Jensen quickly grabbed her waist, preventing her from hitting the sidewall when she jumped off him, “that’s the other surprise I planned for tonight.”

“That’d better be a sex toy and not Peyronie's disease,” Jensen gave her an bewildered look, “what, I like your cock as is, curves just right for my pleasure.”

“Your mouth is gonna be the death of me..”

“..but what a way to go?”

Jensen flopped on his back groaning, “this isn’t how I imagined tonight going.”

“So let’s pretend we’re on set, I’ve flubbed the scene and do another take.”

“That’s why I love you,” he says, tucking a strand of loose hair behind her ear, “the fact everything that pops into my head comes flying out of my mouth?” Jensen chuckles, “yeah well, I like you just as you are and would be the luckiest man alive if you’d marry me.” He reaches into his pocket pulling out the box she sat on and opens it revealing the ring he’d chosen takes her hand sliding it on her finger.

Her silence was almost deafening, having never known her to be without some kind of a response, “getting nervous here sweetheart,” Jensen says, “I know we’ve only been together for a short time and I don’t want you to feel pressured in any way to answer...”

“What’s the stone?”

“Umm..it’s a Moldivite,” she has this expression he wasn’t sure what to make of it. “I know it’s not conventional and if you want to pick something..else..” Jensen broke off watching her eyes fill with tears.

“You gave me this ring, not because you’re being cheap, but ‘cause you know what the significance of its origin would mean to me. You’ve never put on air’s with me, never been anything other than yourself, a genuine, caring, funny as hell, beautiful soul who couldn’t be any more perfect and I’m saying yes!”

SPN TAGS: @donnaintx @lyarr24 @flamencodiva @b3autyfuldisast3r @lassie-bird @nancymcl @spnbaby-67

Dean/Jensen @thoughts-and-funnies @stoneyggirl @akshi8278 @beabutterfly987

[supernaturallyobsessedchic]

The Little Girl

[Gif credit to @vinylackles]

Square: Never Been Kissed ( @supernatural-jackles tell me a story bingo)

Pairing: Jensen x adopted!child!reader

Summary: The Reader is adopted by Jensen and his family after a tragic event in her life. Soon after being adopted, she begins to learn what a family really does.

Warnings: Angsty-ish, child abuse/neglect (implied?), religion is mentioned in here (if you have your own belief, that’s fine we’re all different. It’d be boring if we’re the same.), there will be feels in this both fluffy and sad. You might have happy tears, who knows. Song inspired fic, song fic since the lyrics are in this.

Word Count: 1,840

Bingo Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Mobile Masterlist

a/n: Inspired by the song The Little Girl by John Montgomery. I can’t italicize the lyrics; it’d look a bit weird and mess with the flow of your reading.

a/n2: probably not what one would expect for a “never been kissed” square. But I kept hitting a block with the typical, and this one came to me. Hope ya’ll enjoy nonetheless. :3

~

Her parents never took her to church. Never spoke of his name, never even told her of his word.

Her parent’s weren’t really believers. Her dad drank all day, her mom did drugs. Every night her dad would go out drinking. Her mom would be passed out in the chair as Y/N sat on the couch watching TV.

They never wanted to play. Or give kisses and hugs.

And the drinking and the fighting, just got worse every night.

Behind their couch, she’d be hiding. Praying for it all to stop.

And like it always does, the bad got worse. With every slap, and every curse.

Until her dad in a drunk rage one night, used a gun on her mom. And then took his life.

Some people from the city, took the girl far away. To a new mom and a new dad.

. . .

The caseworker drove young little Y/N up to her new home.

“This family is going to be good to you.”

“Not like my old family?”

“Nothing like them, they’re new parents to one of their own kids. And once they heard your story, they wanted you.”

She sat in the back seat, smiling, wondering how it was going to be like? Who her mom and dad were?

He pulled up to the house, parking it and turning off the car. He gets out to get her things from the trunk, and he stops by her door to help her out.

She picked up her backpack, and turned to see a fancy house.

Suddenly feeling nervous, she swallowed and mustered up whatever courage she had and followed her caseworker to the house.

The caseworker rang the doorbell.

She could faintly hear a women on the other side. “She’s here.”

She sounded excited.

The door opened, she found a man, a woman and small girl standing before her.

“Hi, Chris?” the man asked.

“Yes, you must be Jensen?”

“I am, this is my wife Danneel and my four year old daughter JJ.” Jensen says, introducing his family. “This must be Y/N?”

She nods, shying behind the caseworker.

“It’s okay sweetie, you’re safe here. This is your new home?” Jensen says, getting down to her level.

“How about we have a little tour, warm up to your new family?” Chris, her caseworker suggests.

The little girl nodded, following Chris inside the house as Jensen showed her around.

 That night, dinner went off without a hitch. Sure she was quiet, but she was still a bit shy. But now it was the time for her and her new little sister to go off to bed.

She gone off to her room, getting her night gown on. Heading to her bathroom that her and JJ shared. Danneel helping JJ make sure she was brushing her teeth alright, Y/N grabbed her toothbrush and began cleaning her teeth.

Danneel taking a hairbrush she brushed the girls’ hair.

She could see Y/N tense. She didn’t know what she was doing at first. Danneel continued to brush her hair, cautiously.

She could see her relax as she continued to brush.

“Your parents never did this, did they?” she asked kindly.

Y/N shaking her head as she brushed her teeth.

Danneel held back warm tears that threatened to surface.

What else have these parents not done for her? she wondered.

Once they’ve finished they went off to their respected rooms. Danneel walking JJ to her room, JJ wanting a story. Y/N headed to her room.

She was about to get herself settled when Jensen and Danneel entered.

“Busy day so far, huh?” Danneel asked.

She nods. “mm-hmm.” She hummed quietly.

“Tomorrow we can have a lazy day, all four of us, just relax and maybe even play outside a little bit. The weather’s supposed to be nice.” Jensen says.

“What do you play?” she asks innocently.

“We could do, tag, or hide and seek, or whatever JJ comes up with.” Jensen chuckles.

“Could you teach me?”

“You never played before?” Jensen asked.

She shook her head innocently.

Jensen’s jaw clenched as he fought back tears of his own.

“We’ll teach ya tomorrow. It’ll be fun.” He says with a smile.

Bending over he gives her a sweet kiss atop her head. Danneel following suit.

She laid there staring up at them with wide eyes.

“Get some sleep sweetheart, you had a busy day.” Jensen says, brushing her hair from her face.

Y/N nodded. Feeling herself grow sleepy, she let her eyes fall closed.

Jensen and Danneel smiled softly as they shut her light off, left her door open slightly letting the hall light in. And went back down to the living room.

 It was getting close to Jensen and Danneel to head to bed themselves.

Just as he shut the TV off they heard a sniffle from the dark hallway. Seeing their new daughter stand in the hall, holding her blanket as she rubbed the tears from her eyes.

“Sweetie, what’s wrong?” Danneel asked.

“What’s got you crying?” Jensen follows up, as they both got up to go to her.

“Bad dream.” She cries.

“Everything’s okay sweetheart, you’re safe.” Jensen consoles, rubbing up and down her arm.

The little girl nods but couldn’t stop crying as a slight tremble shook through her. Jensen felt it.

Jensen without hesitation picked her up, holding her close. Walked back to the couch, sitting down with her in his lap.

“What are you doing?” the little girl asked?

“You never been cuddled before?”

She shook her head against Jensen’s chest.

He only held her tighter.

“Well I’m holding you, making you feel safe. It’s something parents should do to help their kids feel safe after a nightmare, being scared, or even if their kid is having a bad day.”

She nods against him.

Danneel sat beside Jensen, sandwiching the little girl between them.

“It wouldn’t hurt to stay up just a little bit longer.” She says.

Jensen nodding as he places a comforting kiss atop their daughter’s head.

 The little girl slowly adjusted to her new family. Getting kisses and hugs every night. Even getting one from her little sister.

Fourth of July with the family was a struggle for a moment. The loud noises sounding an awful lot like gun fire.

She ran inside, crying.

JJ the only one noticing. She followed her big sister into the house. Finding her behind a couch in the family room, crying.

“Sissy what’s wrong?” JJ asked.

“It’s like the night my mom and dad died. It sounds like the gun he used.”

“Your daddy used a gun?”

Y/N nodded tearfully.

“Well our daddy is not like that. Come on sissy, come back outside.” JJ tells her. encouraging her to come with her. Only to get a fearful shake of her sister’s head. And more tears.

She let out a fearful sob.

JJ took it upon herself to comfort her big sister. She got behind the couch with her, sitting in front of her, she kissed the top of her sisters head while cradling it. Having short arms she couldn’t wrap her sister in her arms not like how her dad does.

“JJ?” Jensen calls. “Y/N?”

The stifled cries from Y/N gave them away.

Jensen found the couch where she hid, to find JJ holding Y/N’s head in a hug.

“What’s wrong?”

“Sissy’s scared of the fireworks.”

Jensen having the gut feeling he knew why she was.

“Why are you scared honey?” He asks anyway.

“It sounds like his gun.” She says with her head on her knees.

Jensen’s heart sank.

“It’s okay honey, we’ll get you through this. How about you hang out inside for a bit. Okay?”

Y/N nodded.

“We can play in here, or we can watch movies in the movie room?”

“Okay.” She says. JJ and Y/N getting up to the movie room and watching movies.

 The little girl made so many friends at her new school. One of her friends took her to church one Sunday for the first time.

Sitting in Sunday school, the teacher walked in.

The little girl saw a picture of Jesus on the cross.

“I know that man, up there on the cross.” She says.

“Oh?” the teacher asks.

She nods. “He was there in my old house, and he held me close to his side. As I hid there behind our couch, the night my parents died.”

She told the teacher her story. Her old mom and dad, tainted with sin, neglecting her.

“But everything is fine now. My new mom and dad, they give me kisses and hugs every day. We play almost every day. Dad plays on TV; he plays a guy who fights monsters with his brother. My dad is a hero.”

“What about your new mom?”

“She brushes my hair every night, her and dad make me feel safe. She’s dad’s sidekick.”

Some kids giggled. The teacher even chuckled.

“That’s sweet honey, how about for the first bit of class, we draw our superheroes. It could be Christ Himself, or your parents. Let’s do that and you can take it home to show everyone.”

The teacher let the kids be and draw away.

 Y/N’s friend’s parent’s dropped her off back home.

“How was church honey?” Danneel asked as she waited outside for her.

“It was good, we drew our superheroes in Sunday school.” She says holding up a picture. Drawn in crayon and marker.

Jensen walked through the door outside, stepping beside Danneel wrapping an arm around her.

“How as church kiddo?”

“Good, I was telling mom I drew my superheroes.” She says.

Jensen peered over Danneel’s shoulder. Seeing the same drawing.

Of stick figures, one with Dad under it, wearing a cape with an S on it. Symbolizing Superman.

He saw another stick figure, the word Mom under it. Wore a skirt and a cape with a S on it as well.

Under the both of their stick figures, she wrote in big letters as big as they would fit on the paper, Thank you.

Jensen walked around, picking up Y/N, hugging her close. Danneel joining in the hug as she hugged her and Jensen as close as she could.

“We love you so much sweetheart, and you’re most welcome.” Jensen says, holding back the tears.

She smiled against him as her parents held her close.

At first growing up, she never knew what it was like to be loved, to be given a kiss or a hug. To be cuddled, or let alone held in a loving and cuddling way.

Now she doesn’t have to worry about another fight. She doesn’t have to worry about her dad going off drinking, when he’s always home with his family. She doesn’t have to worry about her mom doing drugs to get through the day, when her mom just needs to see her girls smile, to hear her girls laugh to make her day better. 

~

a/n: Did you cry? Here are some virtual tissues, I cried too hun. How’d you like it, let me know! Feedback is always appreciated!

Jensen Girls:

@luci-in-trenchcoats, @supernatural-jackles, @becs-bunker, @jayankles, @jeaniespiehs20, @winchesters-favorite-girl, @mlovesstories, @moonlight-on-her-skin, @backseat-of-deans-67chevy, @salt-n-burn-em-all, @lyarr24, @akshi8278

Dean Girls:

@flamencodiva, @anotherspnfanfic, @megzdoodle, @misfit0118​

~

Copying and reposting someone else’s content is plagiarism and illegal. This work is property of supernaturallyobsessedchic. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. These works contain material protected under International and Federal Copyright Laws and Treaties. Any unauthorized reprint or use of this material is prohibited. No part of these works may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without express written permission from the author / publisher. An electronic reference link to the original posted work may be provided for purposes of promotion or assistance of publication by the readers discretion, if proper credits are given to the author in the re-post. 4/11/2021

[writingtoforgetreality]

Sounds Of Someday - Little Movie Star Chapter One (Jensen Ackles x Daughter!Reader)

[Actors-Masterlist], [Little Movie Star-Masterlist]

Next Chapter

Summary: Growing up in a children’s home sucked. Big time. Multiple families had taken you in over the years but it always ended the same. You were done with trusting others. So when you found out that there was another family out there who had taken an interest in you, you prepared for the worst. You never thought you would find yourself in Austin, with the Ackles. 

Words: 2,328

Warnings: language, mentions of shitty childhood, angst (?), trust issues, story starts in 2016 (changes in future chapters, you’ll see), for the sake of this story, the twins weren’t born in December but earlier in 2016 (August), (Y/A) = your age IN 2016!!!

If you like my work & wanna support me: a coffee would be highly appreciated ❤

~2016~

Another boring day in your children’s home. You had been a constant part of it ever since you were born. Throughout the years, you were lucky enough to be sent to multiple foster families. In the end, you always ended back here & quite honestly, you were sick of it. By now, there were no other kids in your room anymore. Every now & then, there had been times where you got a roommate but it always seemed like they stayed for an extremely short time. Like, families wanted them & they had never given them back. You, on the other hand, did not have it that easy. Your file was filled with multiple homes & that usually was an indicator for misbehavior. Yet, you had never, not even once, done anything wrong. Just, your luck with families was not necessarily given. And that was one of the worst things a child could endure. Nobody wanted you. You were never good enough & you promised yourself that, no matter what the future might hold for you, you would never ever trust another family again. The outcome was always the same, why bothering?

“(Y/N)?” the door squeaked slightly & a man took a look inside. Bill. He was the only real friend you had ever had. Even though you were not quite sure if friend was the right word. He worked at the children’s home, after all. It was his job to take care of the kids here. Still, you liked him & you had a gut feeling that he was fond of you, too.

“Hey there, Billy Boy. What’s up?” you looked up from the book you were currently reading & raised your eyebrows in question when you saw him hesitating. Usually, he only ever came in when something had happened or when you had to be somewhere. Honestly, you did not care about the schedules you were given. Bill made sure you got everywhere on time & you did the chores you were assigned to do.

“Time to pack your bag. Your new family is waiting.” he tried everything to make his voice sound exciting but deep down he knew you despised the idea of having to go somewhere new. The past had not been particularly kind to you but he had a good feeling about these new people.

“Pleeeease tell me you’re kidding…” your head was thrown back out of frustration. Here we go again, you thought.

“Be outside in 10 minutes, we have a long drive ahead.” Bill shot you a sympathetic smile & you let out a groan. As much as you hated the thought of a new family, you knew better than to mess with the employees here. Getting up, you walked over to your closet & pulled your clothes out, throwing them into your suitcase without much care. There were not many things you owned to begin with so you were done in about five minutes. For the remainder of the time, you sat down on your bed & began overthinking. This situation was nothing new to you, yet you found yourself growing anxious. Why did you still care? They would give you back in no time so why worrying about stuff you could not change? Sighing, you got up, took your suitcase & walked outside to Bill’s car. He had already been waiting for you, leaning against one of the doors. No words were exchanged. His tight lipped smile showed you enough. Pity. You shot him a sarcastic smile back.

You were mad at everyone. Mad at Bill. Mad at your new family. Mad at your parents, who gave you up right after you were born. Mad at yourself. Bill had tried to start a conversation every now & then but you simply told him that you were tired & turned up the volume of the radio to distract your racing thoughts. Time went by slowly, you had no idea how long you had been in this car. All you knew was that your legs were getting tired. Wanting to ask Bill to stop for a while so you could walk around a bit, you were cut off by the car coming to a halt. Huh. Looked like Bill could read your thoughts. The area you guys stopped at was very wealthy, you could tell. The houses were massive & you definitely did not mind walking around the neighborhood for a couple of minutes.

“Where are we?” you could not help but ask. Maybe, if you ever had enough money, you would move to a neighborhood that looked similar to this one.

“Austin, Texas. Welcome home, (Y/N)?” his body turned towards you to wait for your reaction.

“Welcome home?” your eyes widened. “Don’t tell me I’ll live in one of those houses.” there was no way a family this rich would ever want you. Sure Bill had made a mistake & mixed up the addresses.

“I’m afraid you will. This one, to be exact.” he pointed to the one you were parked in front. “Come on, we’re late. They’re waiting for you.” Bill got out of the car & grabbed your suitcase out of the trunk. Right now, you were not sure what to think or what to feel. Surely, this was the biggest house you had ever been to & the fact that you were supposed to live in there? It kind of scared you. Because you were sure that these people expected certain manners from you. And you did not think you could live up to their expectations.

Bill led you to the front door, he was carrying your suitcase for you even though you had told him that you could handle your stuff just fine. He noticed your trembling hands so he simply wanted to help you out a little. Bill nudged your shoulder, signaling that you should be the one knocking. Taking a deep breath, you raised your hand & gently knocked. It was almost inaudible. Literally nobody in a house this big could have heard it. So to say you were surprised when the door opened almost immediately after, was an understatement. One shocking factor followed the other & you gasped when you saw THE Jensen & Danneel Ackles in front of you. Both of them smiled warmly at you & you wished you could have copied their actions but you were too stunned to move. Great, your first impression was awful. It could only get better, right? Bill talked to Jensen & Danneel briefly & before you had time to process what was happening, he hugged you goodbye. Leaving your suitcase standing right next to you & you alone with your new…family? As if the Ackles wanted you? This had to be a mistake. Maybe it was some sort of publicity stunt? It sure left a good impression to take in a foster kid. But if you were not mistaken completely, they had twins not too long ago? A few weeks, you believed.

“Hi, (Y/N), right?” the woman in front of you asked. She was absolutely gorgeous. A nod made her continue. “I’m Danneel & this is my husband Jensen. Wanna come in? It’s better we talk inside.” your eyes switched between her & Jensen & while Jensen had been quiet so far, his smile was convincing enough. Making a move to grab your suitcase, Jensen beat you to it & told you that he got it. You thanked him with a genuine smile. Stop it! Just because you had been a fan of theirs did not change your situation. Soon, they would realize that you were not worth their time & then Bill would come & get you again. Same old, same old.

They walked you to a beautiful couch & told you to have a seat, which you did. Immediately, your hands started rubbing over your thighs, something you did to calm your nerves. Did not seem to work today, though. Both, Jensen & Danneel, placed themselves at either side of you. Their smiles relaxed you a bit & you could feel your breath even out. There was something about their aura that had a calming effect on you.

“It’s a lot right now, I know.” Jensen started, your eyes met his & he continued. “But we’re glad you’re finally here. We’ve been waiting so long for you & the fact that you are now with us makes us incredibly happy.”

“You’ve been waiting for…me?” you were surprised that your voice was so steady.

“Well, you see, there is a lot of paperwork going on before you can actually take in a kid from a children’s home but that doesn’t matter now, you’re here.” Jensen patted your shoulder & you knew he only meant well but you could not help but flinch at his touch. Immediately, he retreated his hand & coughed to brush off the awkwardness. You felt sorry for him but you had never been a fan of physical touch. Simply because you had never really experienced it.

“I think we should show you your room & let you get settled in. What do you say, angel?” Danneel rescued Jensen & you were not quite sure if she was talking to you at first. Did she just call you angel? No one had ever given you a nickname. Smiling slightly, you nodded at her & followed both of them through their house. You wondered if you were staying here long enough to find your way in this labyrinth or if you were sent back before you had the chance to navigate through it yourself.

The three of you arrived in a hallway, a lot of doors on each side & you assumed that was where their kids had their rooms. They still had no idea that you actually knew a lot more about them that you first had shown. For example, that Supernatural had been your favorite show for the longest time. Your plan was to let them in on your little secret as soon as you were in your new room. At the very end of the hallway, & you had to admit, you had never seen such a pretty hallway in your life, Danneel opened the door & ushered you in. Looking around, you were mesmerized. The room was huge, you could not believe that it would all be yours to live in.

“You like it?” Jensen, who was standing in the doorway, asked you. Turning around, you nodded & smiled a little. A rush of overwhelming thoughts came crushing over you & you had to gulp for a second. Deep breaths, you got this. This was too much to ask for. All of a sudden, you felt like you did not deserve any of this. Certainly, you did not deserve to live with a family like the Ackles.

“I assume the kids are in the rooms next to mine?” asking before really thinking what you were about to say. When neither of them answered, you looked up & saw their expressions. Shit, this was not your plan. Knowing the questions were about to start, you quickly continued & explained yourself before things got even weirder.

“I mean, I know you guys have three other kids. A three-year-old & twins, only a couple of weeks old, right?” followed by a quiet chuckle, you hoped they were not regretting their decision of taking you in already.

“You know us?” Jensen came a little closer & took a seat on the comfortable looking bed that was perfectly placed in your room. Already, you could imagine yourself putting effort into decorations to make it look more like yourself, more homely. No, wait. No need to worry about that, you would be gone & then all of your effort would be for nothing.

“Supernatural is my favorite show.” slowly, you took a seat next to Jensen, not too close, there was still a good distance between you two.

“Perfect, now you finally have someone to talk about the show who isn’t Jared.” Danneel joked & crossed her arms over her chest. They seemed…fine with you being a fan? Huh, definitely unexpected. You thought they would throw you out right away.

“Great, so you already know a little bit about us. JJ will love you. She’s been dying to meet her big sis for weeks now.” he sounded genuine. Big sis. You had never been a big sister. Were you ready to take that role? Why did you feel so much pressure all of a sudden? Jensen stood up & walked over to Danneel who handed him a little wrapped box.

“Bill told us you don’t have a phone so this is a welcome gift from us.” gently, you took the box from him & gave him an uncertain look. Yet, your hands moved on their own & you were shocked when you saw what phone they had given you. The newest iPhone? What the fuck? You could not take it, it was too much.

“That’s…nice & all, thank you. But it’s really too much, I can’t-“ you got interrupted by Danneel.

“Sure, you can. We want you to be able to contact us at any time. We’ll leave you to it for now. Get settled in, dinner is at 6 pm. Remember the way to the kitchen?” you only nodded, at a loss for words. The door shutting was the last thing you heard before being left alone in complete silence. The voices in your head the only noise you could make out. Why could you not make them stop? Why could you not just enjoy this? They seemed nice. Like they were actually trying for you. Why did you have to let your past consume you? Silent tears flowed down your face. For a while, you just let yourself feel. Feel whatever emotion your body was experiencing right now. You were alone right now, might as well take advantage of it.

~to be continued~

Next Chapter 

Published (03/20/2021) by Cathy

Tags: @vicmc624, @imaginationisgrowth, @stoneyggirl, @alyispunk, @thevelvetseries, @multifandomlover121, @samsgirl93,, @supernatural3002, @diabetes-03, @prettybubblesintheair (let me know if you wanna be tagged <3)

[thekatherinewinchester]

Christmas Wishes - Part 1

Summary: Jensen and Katherine are going through a rough patch in their marriage. Jared winds up in a coma from a car accident. What will happen if he never wakes up? Will Jensen and Katherine ever have a family of their own? Pairing(s): Jensen x OFC!Reader, Jared x Gen Word Count: 3925 Parts: 1/3 Warnings: fertility issues, car accident, hospitalization, coma, comatose, miscarriage (mentioned), unprotected sex, p in v, oral (fem receiving), Jensen is a bit of an ass for a moment

A/N: divider credit: @firefly-graphics DISCLAIMER: THIS IS A WORK OF FICTION AND NOTHING MORE. I MEAN NO DISRESPECT TO JENSEN, DANNEEL OR THEIR BEAUTIFUL FAMILY. FOR THE PURPOSE OF THIS FIC JENSEN NEVER MARRIED DANNEEL.

When I was young, I was told that the possibility of me ever having a child would be close to impossible. At the time it didn’t bother me. I was young, in no shape or form ready to take on parenthood; I was also pretty sure I would never want to have kids of my own. I love children, don’t get me wrong, I just never thought I would want any of my own. I had always hoped that if I did have children, that they would be just as amazing as my niece and nephews.

It wasn’t until I met the love of my life and we’d had the future talk that I realized that just maybe I did want to experience motherhood for myself. Just imagining him with our child – our little girl - in place of my niece melted my heart.

It broke my heart telling him that we may not have a future as a family of three or more. Just the look of devastation on his face will be one that will always haunt my dreams. He promised me that he would love me no matter what, that he would be okay if it was just the two of us. I believed him for the first five years of our marriage but as time went on, we started drifting apart more and more after each miscarriage I’d had.

We’ve made it to our 10th anniversary, but I fear we may not make it to our 11th. Most nights when we argue now, he sleeps in another room. I’ve come to dread bedtime and come to loathe sleeping alone. I miss my husband, so much it hurts.

The sound of Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles saying that I had a phone call brought me out of my thoughts. I looked at the caller ID. It was my sister-in-law, Gen.

“Hey Gen, what’s up?” I asked her. Maybe she wanted to get together and that could be a good distraction from my possibly failing marriage.

“Katherine, you need to get to the hospital.” My heart stopped. My mind was coming up with all these worse case scenarios. “It’s Jared.” I stopped breathing. I knew he was having trouble lately. I prayed to God that it hadn’t gotten bad enough that he broke his promise to me; to always keep fighting. A promise that we had made to each other when he’d lost a friend and I had attempted suicide as a teen. My brother is my rock, my whole world, I didn’t know how I was going to cope if any had happened to him. He’s everything to me, I don’t know how to function without him.

“It’s not what you’re thinking. You know that he would never do that, especially if it meant breaking a promise to you. He was in an accident on his way home from the store. He didn’t have the kids with him so they’re fine and safe.” I let out a sob I hadn’t realized I was holding in.

Gen gave me moment. “I’m on my way. Do I need to call Jensen, or does he already know?”

“I called him right before I called you.” I nodded even though she couldn’t see me. I got up from the couch and headed to our mudroom to get my shoes on. As I grabbed my keys and purse, I told Gen I would see her in a moment.

I was almost breathless by the time I had reached the nurse’s station. All I could manage to get out coherently was Padalecki. The woman didn’t even look up at me before saying that she was not at liberty to give any information regarding the patient. I was trying to remain calm. I may not have Padalecki blood running through my veins, but lord knows that I have my brother's short temper and quick, sharp tongue. I was raised a Padalecki, that’s all that matters.

I took a deep breath so as not to say something I shouldn’t. My brother needed me, and I was not about to get thrown out by being a bitch. “Look nurse, I’m his sister, I kind of have a right to know about the condition of my brother. Not to mention his best friend is my husband.”

Still the young nurse wouldn’t look up at me. I couldn’t decide if she was a fan of the show and didn’t like me because she thought Jensen could do better or if she was just being a bitch. My patience was beginning to wear thin. It wasn’t going to be long before she got a tongue lashing if she didn’t tell me where my brother was.

She looked up at me. “I don’t care who you claim to be. I am not divulging private information about a patient to you and the rest of you nosy, obnoxious fangirls. I don’t care how many of you come in asking to know what’s going on, I’m not going to tell you. Even if I could, I wouldn’t. It’s none of your business. You are not Mr. Padalecki’s sister, nor are you Mrs. Ackles. Now, you need to leave before I call hospital security to escort you out.” She went back to typing on her computer.

Just like that my fight left me. With everything going on with Jensen and I had caused some tension between him and Jared. I hated it. I might currently be Mrs. Jensen Ackles but now I didn’t feel like her. Like any good big brother, Jared has taken my side and I feel so guilty about it. I mean, I don’t feel like there should be sides. Yes, Jensen and I are having marital issues but that doesn’t mean he needs to practically lose his best friend because of it. 

The nurse’s words just hit too close to home and with my anxiety rearing its ugly head I couldn’t find it in me to fight her and demand she tell me what room my brother was in or what the hell was going on. I could feel the tears forming in my eyes getting ready to fall down my cheeks. Wordlessly I turned on my heel and walked back to my car. I wasn’t going to leave; I could never bring myself to when Jared was in the hospital, no matter how bad my anxiety was getting to be. I just needed a moment to collect myself. The kids didn’t need to see their aunt like this, especially with their father in the hospital. I knew Gen would try and mother hen me. I honestly didn’t know how Jensen would react, if he would even care. Oops, I think that came out a little bitter. 

By the time I got myself calmed down and my anxiety quieted mostly, half an hour had passed, and I hadn’t realized it. Not until I heard my phone going off, alerting me that Gen was calling.

“Where are you, Katherine? We’ve been waiting for you.”

“Hey Gen, I’m in the parking lot. I just needed a moment; I didn’t want the boys seeing me in my state.” I partially lied. I couldn’t bring myself to tell her about the nurse and how her words affected me. I was embarrassed that I let her words affect me the way that they did. “I’ll be up in a moment.” She said “okay,” and we hung up.

I took a couple of deep breaths. I could do this. I wasn’t going to let her scare me away again. My big brother needed me, no matter the kind of condition he was in. I got out of my car with my head held high and went back into the hospital.

Unfortunately, the same nurse was still on shift - I had hoped that there had been a shift change in my absence. No such luck. I took another deep breath and continued to hold my head up high.

“Excuse me, but I would like to know what room and floor my brother is on please.” Once again, she didn’t even look up at me. What is wrong with this young woman, rude much? I was always taught that you looked at someone when they were speaking to you. Someone needs to learn some manners. 

The young girl let out an annoyed sigh. She finally looked up at me with a glare. A pathetic one at that. “I already told you that you weren’t getting any information. There is no way in hell that you are Katherine Ackles. I took a Hippocratic oath when I took this job. Celebrity or not, you are not family to the patient, therefore you are not getting any form of information out of me.”

I was glad that she was taking her job seriously and in part protecting my brother, but I was annoyed that she wouldn’t tell me anything. “I’m serious, I’m Katherine Ackles. I have every right to know where my brother is and what his condition is. I’m glad that you’re doing your job, but this is ridiculous.”

“Listen lady, you’re not the first nor will you be last person to come in here claiming to be Katherine Ackles. You’re not getting any sort of information, nor will you be getting any access to Mr. Padalecki and his family. Now, you can either leave peacefully and quietly or I’m calling security to escort you out as I said earlier.”

I was getting fed up with this child. “Do you even watch the show are know anything about the actors and their families? If you did then you would know that I am Katherine Ackles. I would like to speak to the head nurse on shift. This is outrageous!”

The nurse rolled her eyes and picked up the phone to call security. “I don’t watch the show, nor do I really care about celebrity gossip. Besides, someone like you couldn’t possibly be the wife of Jensen Ackles from what I have seen of the man. I would hope he has better taste.” I was shocked. I was too stunned at her unprofessionalism to fire a response back. 

The security guard had gotten there quickly and before I knew it, he had me by the arm -quite forcibly might I add. There was going to be bruise there tomorrow, I could already tell. 

Just as he was about to roughly take me out of the hospital, I could hear the heavy footsteps of my husband. 

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Jensen sounded pissed. 

The security guard stopped. He looked slightly confused. “Escorting this woman out, sir. I was told to remove her; she was being uncooperative and was trying to get information on a patient she has connection to.”

Jensen grabbed my hand and pulled me away from the now fully confused guard. “Of fucking course, she has a connection! Why pray tell are you escorting my wife out of the hospital when her brother is currently in surgery? We’ve been waiting for her upstairs for fifteen minutes. I came to see what was taking her so long.” Jensen was about to rip this guy a new one. I must admit I did feel kind of bad for him. Not too much considering he did manhandle me rough enough to leave a bruise. If Jensen doesn’t see the red handprint already forming on my bicep, then the guard might be able to live. Regardless of what was going on between us, he wasn’t going to take kindly to someone hurting me – let alone a woman.

The guard looked to the nurse behind the desk. I smirked to myself. She would about to be in for a rude awakening. “Nurse Turner asked me to escort her out.”

“Did you think to ask Nurse Turner why you were to escort my wife out?”

The guard had the sense to look guilty. “No sir, she just asked me to escort out the woman that was trying to impersonate a patient's family member for information and refusing to leave.”

I could see the annoyance growing on my husband’s face. “Did it occur to you that maybe she was actually claiming to be who she was, that maybe Nurse Turner was confused. Someone should have asked for her ID as confirmation.” He whipped his face in annoyance.

“Correction, she wasn’t confused she was being a judgmental bitch, Jensen. She didn’t believe that someone like me -someone my size- could be your wife. She said and I quote, “would hope that you had more taste”. She wouldn’t believe that I was your wife and couldn’t be Jared’s sister, therefore, she wouldn’t tell me anything. Hence why it’s taken me forever to get to y’all. Even if she was required to ask for proof of identification – which I think she is – she is clearly refusing to do that part of her job. She’s just a snobby little brat with too much attitude and no manners.” I looked right at Nurse Turner and saw her turn white. That’s right bitch. 

Jensen narrowed his eyes at the Nurse. If it was possible, she paled a couple of shades whiter. “I want to see the head nurse on duty. This is not acceptable. You had no right to treat my wife the way that you did. Even if she wasn’t my wife, you should still treat her with respect like any decent human being. It’s rude and shallow to judge her based on her size. 

“I will have you know that my wife is beautiful inside and out. I wish I could say the same for you. If you will excuse us, we have a family that is waiting for us upstairs. I want to see the head nurse within the next fifteen minutes.” With that Jensen gently tugged my hand and led me towards the elevators.

It was silent between us as we waited for the elevator. I was beginning to worry if he had been putting on an act. He still held my hand in his, so that kept the hope burning within me slightly. 

“Thank you, Jensen, for what you did back there. I know that things have been off with us lately, with all the fighting. Thank you for still having my back.” I gently squeezed his hand in thanks. 

The elevator dinged and he pulled me with him. Once we were in the elevator, he pulled me into him. I immediately melted into his embrace. For the first time in a long while I felt like I was home.

He kissed the crown of my head. “I will always have your back, My Sweet Persephone.” I teared up at the use of my nickname that he had only for me. Maybe there was hope for us after all. “That nurse worked your anxiety up, didn’t she? That’s why you were in your car when Gen called you.” I couldn’t bring myself to speak so I just nodded my head. He held me tighter and placed his head on mine. We stayed like that until the doors opened a moment later. We walked out hand in hand. For the first time in a while, I had hope that everything was going to be okay between us.

We reached Gen, the boys, and Odette; Gen being the first to spot us. She ran to me and wrapped me in a hug. 

“He’s in surgery right now. All I know is that a teenage girl was texting when she hit him. She has a couple of scratches and a minor concussion but other than that she’s fine. She hit the driver side. They haven’t told me much else. They said as soon as they know anything, they will tell us.” I hugged my sister-in-law tighter. My brother was stubborn and a fighter. He was going to be okay. He just had to be.

“He’s gonna make it through, Gen. You know how stubborn he is and how much of a fighter he is. We both know that this isn’t how his story ends, he won’t let it be.” She hugged me tightly back.

“Damn straight!” We pulled apart and I walked over to the kids to check on them. Tom and Shep were sitting at a kid’s table coloring while Jensen had Odette in his arms. My heart warmed and broke at the sight. I began wondering if we would ever have that. I still had the slightest bit of hope that we just might. I didn’t want to lose my husband. “I saw you two came up holding hands. Does this mean that everything is starting to get better between the two of you?”

Before I could catch Gen up on what had happened downstairs, the head nurse walked past us and towards Jensen. Jensen looked up from a sleeping Odette and his facial expression changed from peaceful to angry.

Gen grabbed my hand and pulled us a little way away so that we could talk. “What happened downstairs Katherine, what took you so long to get up here?” I took a deep breath and told her everything that had happened upon my arrival, about my anxiety attack in the car, and the whole fiasco that Jensen walked in on.

She was speechless. “Yeah, he was pissed. I couldn’t believe what came out of her mouth either. Let’s hope that where the guard grabbed me doesn’t bruise - if it does, that Jensen doesn’t see it. For a moment, it felt like old times, like we were how we used to be before all the arguing. He actually called me his wife and remembered I existed. I don’t understand it but I’m not gonna complain.” I looked over at my husband still talking to the horrified head nurse. A small smile formed on my face. “I actually have hope now that I just might have my husband back, that my brother has his best friend back. I have hope that things will be okay with us. For the first time in a long time, I just have hope.” 

Gen gently squeezed my hand in support. “You know that Jared and I both are rooting for you and Jensen. We know that he loves you more than anything in the world. He’s just, I don’t even know, but I hope that you do know he loves you. Don’t give up on him. I know that the last miscarriage has really done a number on your marriage but you two are meant to be. I just know it!” She pulled me in for another hug “Never forget Jared’s motto, Always Keep Fighting”. I think this applies to that as well.” I nodded my head.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw someone coming towards us. It was the head nurse. She looked angry and embarrassed.

“Mrs. Ackles, I would like to apologize for the behavior and treatment of one of my nurses. Had it been my decision she would not have been hired. Her father is a major benefactor of the hospital and insisted she have a job here. Her father is trying to teach her responsibility and whatnot. This is unfortunately not the first time she has done something like this. I will be talking to her father and with any luck she will be removed from her post. I personally don’t like the girl, but for the time being my hands are tied. I do promise you, Mrs. Ackles that she will be reprimanded and punished accordingly.” She began walking away before she stopped and turned back to me. “If I may say so, Mrs. Ackles, you are a very lucky woman to have such a loving and supportive husband. He reminds me so much of my late James. Regardless of what Nurse Turner says, you two make a beautiful couple. I must admit that I fangirled - as the young people say - with my daughter when news of your engagement broke. We always, what is the term -shipped? - the two of you.” 

I couldn’t help the reddening of my cheeks. “Thank you so much, your support means a lot. Thank you for handling the situation. If you would like, I could sign something for you and your daughter, it’s the least I could do in gratitude.” The older woman waved me off. 

“Dealing with unruly nurses is a part of my job; I don’t just tend to patients. You don’t need to give me anything for simply doing my job.” The kind woman smiled at me. “All I want is for you to keep loving that handsomely sweet husband of yours and doing a great job on the show.”

I smiled in return. “Yes, ma’am, I can do that for you.”  With that, she went back to her duty and was off to talk to a nurse in big trouble. 

I walked over to my family and sat with them to await news on my brother.

I was just about to fall asleep on Jensen’s shoulder when someone began walking towards us. Seeing the doctor caused me to be wide awake. This was the moment of truth; the moment that we would know the fate of my world. We all stood up to greet the doctor. It felt like it was taking the doctor forever to reach us. His facial expression wasn't giving anything away. I couldn't decide if that was a good sign or bad sign.

“I’m assuming everyone here is for Mr. Padalecki?” We nodded our heads. Gen grabbed my right hand while I grabbed Jensen’s right arm. Thankfully, the kids were all fast asleep in the chairs. I wouldn't want them to awaken in case the news was bad.

“We’re expecting him to make a full recovery.” I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders and I could breathe again. “However, that is only permitting if he wakes up from his coma. We’re confident that he will.” Just like that my world came crashing down around me.

“He sustained mostly minor injuries other than the blow to his head. He had some internal bleeding that was quickly patched up. A couple of broken ribs and a bruised lung. All in all, he’s going to be fine. His body has put itself to sleep so that he can heal better and at its own pace; it’s just a matter of how long it could take. He will wake up, I can assure you, I just can't tell you when that may be.”

I hadn’t realized that I’d begun falling until I felt Jensen wrapping his arms around me. Yes, it was good news that Jared would indeed wake up. I just wished that it would be now and not days, weeks, or months from now. I could only pray that his body would heal him by tomorrow.  I heard a loud sob only to realize that it had come from me. Jensen pulled me even tighter and began stroking my hair. He kept telling me over and over that Jared was going to be fine, that he would wake up soon -the doctor had said so and doctors are rarely wrong. That’s what scared me the most, Jared’s doctor could be the one doctor that was wrong. I could feel my vision blurring and blackening due to my inability to breathe. It didn’t even register that Jensen and Gen were calling out my name. Everything went dark.

WAYWARD SQUAD:

@dean-winchesters-bacon @waywardnerd67 @ladywinchester1967 @dammitsammy @snffbeebee

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

If I Love You Too Masterlisst

Summary: After the worst six months of his life, Jensen is exhausted. Keeping up with the charade of being better for family and friends as well as the new challenges of sudden single fatherhood while trying to get back out to work have him at his breaking point. A live in nanny in the last thing he wants but he desperately needs another set of hands on call to help out with the day to day. Someone to show up, do the work, and won’t ask a million questions about how he’s doing and if he’s alright. Someone he doesn’t have to pretend to. But he didn’t expect to like her, let alone fall in love with her. A part of him says not to risk that pain again but another part, the bigger part, says he might not have a choice in the matter…

Pairing: Jensen x nanny!reader

Word Count: TBD

Warnings: language, car accidents, age gaps, mentions of injury/death of a spouse/death of a parent/depression/anxiety/past child abuse/past sexual assault (not graphic), mild violence, self-worth issues, smut and smut related topics, loads of fluffy moments

A/N #1: This series is a complimentary series to If I Fell For You and shows the story from Jensen’s POV. Also, this series is absolutely no hate towards Danneel. I’ve never seen if from you guys but a quick reminder wife-hate isn’t welcome here.

A/N: #2: There is NO TAGLIST for this series. Parts will come out on no set schedule however I will update the below when I do know of them!

______

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3 (coming TBD)

etc.

[unnuevosoltransformalarealidad]

Foreigner

Title: Foreigner Summary: Your best friends show you that even when your family is not around, you still have a family and that you’re not alone Pairing: J2 x Reader Prompt: Square Filled > Birthday Warnings: None Word Count: 2341 (It’s long, sorry) This was written for the @anyfandomgoesbingo​ 

^

*Y/N POV*

You’ve met Jared and Jensen a few years ago when you went to a Con after moving into the States. Little did you know, a year later you were going to get cast as a special guest on the show. The guys remembered you from the Con and without even realizing it, they became your best friends.

The guys were always checking on you, if you were fine, if you were comfortable in the place you were staying, they basically adopted you as their kid. Being far away from home and having no family around can be scary. You really appreciated the way they care about you, they were the protective big brothers you needed. You could count on them whenever you needed them. Even Gen and Danneel treated you as their child as well. From being alone and on your own, you ended up with two amazing friends and two sets of family.

After your participation in the show, you tried to see the guys and their families at least twice a month, if your schedules allowed it, but between their filming schedule and your school schedule sometimes it was impossible.

Unfortunately, this year was very difficult for everyone around you, especially your family. With a worldwide pandemic, it was almost impossible for neither them nor you to travel, mostly because your family lived at the end of the world and the tickets were highly expensive and now with all of this, getting into the country was the worst.

Your birthday was coming, and with this, you were going to spend it without your family. It was going to be the first time since you moved in and it broke your heart. Sure, you had your best friends and their families, but you wanted your family as well. Jared and Jensen were worried about you because were avoiding them. They were aware that your birthday was coming and clearly you weren’t in the mood of celebrating it. When the pandemic began, eight months ago, you stayed with Gen and the kids, and a few weeks later you moved with Daneel and her kids, but a few weeks prior to Jared and Jensen coming back from Vancouver, you moved into your apartment alone. All of them knew you pretty well, and they figured out that you isolated yourself because you were sad because your family couldn’t travel to see you. It broke their heart knowing that, and they wanted to do something about it.

——— 

*Jensen’s POV*

You called Jared through FaceTime. It worried about what was going on with Y/N. She is your best friend and you weren’t able to figure out what was going on in her mind.

-We have to do something with Y/N — Jensen said -Like what? — Jared asked -I don’t know man, something. She stayed 4 days with Daneel and left before I arrived — Jensen commented -Gen told me something similar. I think that the pandemic is affecting her — Jared mentioned -Yeah. I mean, it affected everyone in different ways, but I think that with her is something else — Jensen said -What do you think it is? — Jared inquired -Her birthday is coming and her family is not able to come due to the pandemic — Jensen told Jared -And what do you think we should do? We could throw a party for her, right? — Jared asked -Let’s talk with the girls and figure this out — Jensen said to Jared

Jared and Jensen went to talk with their wives and see what we could come up with. It broke his heart knowing how alone you felt even if Jared and you were your best friends and your other family. Both families came up with a plan. They wanted to make you feel loved and at home. 

———

*Y/N’s POV*

You had spent the past few weeks crying and blaming yourself for not buying tickets for your family early in the year. You checked your phone for the first time in days and you had several missed calls from Jared and Jensen, some from your parents, and thousands of text messages from all of them as well. It made you feel even worse, everyone was worried about you and you weren’t having the strength to tell them what was going on.

You were about to call Jensen when you heard a knock on your door. You got up from the couch and went to the door to look through the peephole. It was Jensen. You opened the door and went to the couch -Yes, I know. I should’ve answered. I’m sorry -Hello to you too, sweetheart. I’m glad to see you’re fine — Jensen said closing the door -What do you want? -I was checking on you. Seeing you were fine. If… -Well, now you know I’m fine. You are free to go — you interrupted him -Ok. Let's go -What? -Come spend the rest of the week with us. Please — he begged You just nodded and hugged him. You were tired of being alone. Jensen helped you to pack your stuff, making sure you had enough clothes to stay with him more time than intended. -Why don’t you look for something special? Dani is planning to make a fancy dinner for the kids in a few days — Jensen asked you -Alright — you said not too happy

Once you and Jensen finished packing, he helped you to put your bags in the trunk of the car. You two got in the car and started the trip to Jensen’s house. He had a questioning look and you were getting annoyed.

-What? Spilled it -Nothing, sweetheart. It's just I was expecting to see you at home when I got back from Vancouver, and you weren't there -I didn't want to bother. Besides, I needed to be alone — you admitted -I’m sorry you felt that way. But I wanted to spend some time with you — Jensen said -It’s ok. I’ve just felt like that for quite some time, and I thought that I needed some time alone, that’s why I left before you arrived. I didn’t want to worry — you explained defeated -I get it, believe me. But you should’ve stayed and maybe I could’ve had helped you, ya know. That’s what friends are for — he said and grabbed your hand. You just gave him a small smile. The rest of the trip went on a comfortable silence. You noticed that every once in a while, Jensen looked at you. -I’m fine Jay — you said — Thank you — you smiled Sometime later, Jensen and you arrived at his house.  -Home sweet home, sweetheart. Let’s get your bags and head inside — Jensen said

Jensen grabbed your bags with one hand and with the other he hugged you. Once inside the house, Jensen helped you to set your stuff in the guest room. -I’ll let you finish here. I’ll be downstairs -Uhm… Jay -Is everything alright? — He asked you concerned -Where are Dani and the kids? I was expecting her to be here -She went to the Padalecki’s. She wanted you to settle down calmly without the kids around you.  -Oh, ok -I’ll let you finish. Whatever you need, just tell me, okay? — You just nodded When Jensen was about to close the door you called him -Jay -Hm? -Thank you. I really appreciate it -Anytime kid — he smiled sadly. And with that, he left you alone in the room. 

That night, Jared came and stayed with you saying that Dani and the kids were going to spend the night there because JJ and Thomas didn’t want to stop playing. It was nice to spend some time with your best friends but in the end, you would’ve stayed in your room alone.  The days went by and you were closing yourself more and more. Your birthday was a day away and you were without your family. You promised yourself to not contact them because if you did it, it was going to be a lot worse.

The night before your birthday, Dani came to your room and knock softly -Y/N/N, sweetie? — she called -Yes? -Can you be ready in 10? JJ wants to have a fancy tea party — she said -This late? — you asked surprised -Yeah, she said that someone important was coming — Dani explained giggling -Okay. I’ll do my best to impress this person — you joked Dani left you alone in your room again. You weren’t in the mood for playing or anything. You just wanted to go to sleep and ignore the world. Instinctively, you reached for your phone to check the hour and you remembered that you had turned it off. In your hometown, it was already your birthday and you didn’t want to talk to anyone. You were going to be scolded by your parents for doing that, but it was the best you could do to avoid any more suffering.

Ten minutes later, Jensen was knocking on your door -Sweetheart, are you ready? JJ is impatient and she wants us now — Jensen said entering your room -Give me a minute and I’ll be out — you said from the bathroom You weren’t going to disappoint JJ, you just needed some time to get yourself together. Your heart clenched at the thought of pretending to have fun when you were this upset. A minute later you were out -Sorry — you apologized -Everything fine? — Jensen asked seeing your eyes a little puffy -Yeah. With all this happening it’s been a while since I wore makeup and I just kind of touched my eye and it stung a lot -That sound dangerous — Jensen joked -Tell me about it -You look gorgeous, by the way — Jensen complimented you and you got shy — Let’s get going You didn’t know why, but you were nervous. All of it was a mystery for you, Daneel had told you that JJ wanted a fancy tea party and Jensen told you that Dani wanted to make something special for the kids. You were really confused.

When you were about to enter the living room, Jensen sensed you were somewhat nervous and gave you a reassuring smile while squeezing your hand. Something deep inside of you knew what was about to happen, even though you’ve never told them when exactly was your birthday. When you stepped inside the living room, JJ came running and hugged you -Are we on time? — you asked her returning the hug -Yes! Let’s go to the table — she said and drugged you inside the living room JJ kept you distracted that you hadn’t realized Jensen and Dani were gone and it was just you and the kids. You kept glancing to the kitchen to make sure they were there without ignoring JJ and all her rambling. She definitely was having fun with you.

Sometime later, JJ left you saying she needed to go to the bathroom leaving you in the living room, alone with her toys. You got up to sit on the couch when Dani entered the living room -How did you manage to get alone? -Nature called — you smiled -How are you feeling? I’ve seen you weren’t in the greatest mood -Honestly? Not great. I miss my family a lot. It’s been a long time since I hugged my mom — you admitted -How long since the last time you visit? -Almost two years. The last time I went, I stayed less than a week. I had to get back to work and they didn’t like it, so we kind of had a fight. I never had the chance to forgive them in person — you said cleaning a fallen tear -They’d probably understood. You shouldn’t worry about it -I was planning on staying for a few months, but I guess it wasn’t the time to do it — you mentioned -I can’t imagine how hard can it can be — Dani said squeezing your hand You hadn’t realized but you had started to cry, it was the first time in months that you finally broke. You were in so much pain and here you were, crying in front of one of your best friends. Dani came closer to you and hugged you, letting you cry on her shoulder. It warmed your heart knowing you could trust her and shared these things. 

You felt the couch dipped on the other side from you. You knew it was Jensen, you could recognize his scent everywhere. -Hey, it’s ok — he said caressing your back When you looked at him, he had the sweetest smile on his face -Happy birthday sweetheart — he said In front of you, there was a cake with lit candles, Jared and Gen were with the kids, JJ and the twins were on the other side of the table, and there was a huge sign on the wall with balloons -What’s all of this? — you said crying -We knew that your birthday was coming and neither you nor your family was able to travel and you were upset about it — Jensen explained -So we talked with the girls, and came with this idea to celebrate your birthday — Dani explained -And to remind you that we are your family too — Jared said -And you can count on us, whenever you need — Gen commented You were a mess, you couldn’t believe it. Your best friends, your second family, was the greatest thing that could happen to you after moving in. -Thank you so much, guys. You don’t even know how much this means for me. I love you so much — you admitted When the pandemic started, you thought you were going to spend your birthday alone, instead, you were with your second family. It was the best birthday gift ever.

Tag List (Let me know if you want to be added)

@iguessweallcrazyithinktho | @void-hoechlin | @mrspeacem1nusone | @thevelvetseries | @bitchy-witchy-post-mortem | @caplanbuckybarnes | @akshi8278

[sara78]

Family don't end in blood - chapter 9

Summary: Jensen stumbles into a familiar, but not-so-loveable face and learns how far and how bad things can go for him, his friends and his family, including Y/N. Everyone is alarmed and has to work together if they want to stay as safe as possible

Word count: 5,000 and some more

Warnings: Scary situations, angst, mentioned death/murder (nothing major but SKIP IF IT TRIGGERS YOU), angst, SO MUCH DRAMA

Transcription - Y/M/N: Your mother's name ; Y/H/C: Your home country

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x foster!daughter reader

A/N: Whoops...

3rd person POV

After meeting with Jensen's and Danneel's lawyer most of the things got cleared up.

Y/N's mother must be working with Jane. Disowning a child is a felony in the US, therefore when she got disowned there would have been absolutely zero records of it here in the States, but Jane had no trouble finding Y/N and obviously scaring her and everyone else to death.

They also found out that Jane is in the dirty part of CPS. Just what they heard she did to some kids made shivers run down their spines and they definitely didn't want to see that woman ever again. But, since she is probably working with Y/N's mother, she won't be able to get a hold of warrants for forcefully taking Y/N away for a long time, maybe she never gets them in the first place. And that made everyone sleep a little easier at night.

What had all three of them a bit under the weather was the fact that pushing Jensen and Danneel into the foster care system will take much more effort and it might not be doable. There were too many things to do and some people are corrupted enough to just fuck people off for no good reason. This time, the reason was the supposed publicity Jensen and Danneel wanted that came with adopting a child. Which was of course pure bullshit. But then, how do you explain that to someone?

But as of now, Y/N's been staying with Jensen. They flew back to Vancouver to finish filming for the season, second semester of high school started for Y/N and she really didn't have a lot of time to worry about the whole disowning thing. She couldn't care less if she was being honest.

Jensen's POV

I was waiting outside a pizzeria, getting some fresh air while waiting for my order to be done. I wanted to surprise Y/N with her favorite pizza and a shake, as I knew she has a documentary to watch in her history class which she enjoys and she could use a little dinner beforehand.

I was looking around the dimly lit streets that led to where I stood. This part of Vancouver isn't always crowded, but in the evenings, just like this, a lot of teenagers and grown-ups walked around these parts, in search of some good fun or just a place to grab a bite and hang out in.

Until I saw a face that made my blood boil.

The first person my mind went to was Y/N. I had to act quick, so I dialed Jared,

"Jared, Poughkeepsie."

"Poughkeepsie? What?"

"Poughkeepsie. Now," I ordered sternly as I ended the call, seeing the face walk up to me and tug me for my sleeve,

"You and I need to have a little chat," Y/N's mother spoke as she pulled me to an alley behind the pizzeria. I followed her, not planning to make a scene in a more or less crowded street,

"You need a little visit to the mental ward but here the fuck we are," I growled back, "What the fuck do you want?"

"I want Y/N," she said, slamming me against a wall,

"I told you this weeks ago and I'll repeat now - you won't go near her ever again."

"Now, now, you can already tell how big of a waste she is, how worthless and stupid she is. How about you drop that little game of yours and we can talk the real shit. We could both benefit really well if we work together."

"I don't have to drop any games because I'm not playing," I said, getting into her face, "I'm not faking a thing when it comes to that child."

"I could give you money," she said, making me huff a smile, "She'll get her master's and doctorate in 10 years tops and I'll give you a part of her paycheck. Don't tell me you don't want some money, just to be safe if your job ever goes to shit."

"And I'd rather die than work with you, so I'll happily reject your sick offer and whatever sick game you have planned in your twisted mind."

"I don't have a problem with you dying," she laughed evilly, "Especially if I get to be the one end you. So, choose wisely."

"You're insane," Jensen breathed, "Why can't you just let her go? She's old enough to have her own life. She's done with you to the point where she won't even sue you for everything you did to her. Just go back to Y/H/C and forget about her. Let her go."

"I am either leaving here with her or I die. I do not accept failure."

"What was your point?" I asked, "In disowning her. We know you work with Jane. I know that was some poor attempt from your side to take her in with a fake name on you or something. We know many things you think we don't. We can put two and two together and we're not stupid, especially not Y/N. But then, you would know that. She's everything you never were. And now, you're nothing without her. And that hurts a whole lot, doesn't it?"

Y/M/N had no problem kicking me in the stomach, making me double over but I managed to push her away, not wanting to attack her but just to defend myself. But something shifted in the way she looked at me after that punch. Something told me that she was scared, that she didn't expect us to put things together and read her master plan as easily as we did. Hell, she probably counted on us not even thinking of it.

"Oh, how sad," she mimicked, "Poor Y/N, always being the victim. What other lies did she feed you with? How awful of a mother I am? Or how she didn't have a daddy to love her?"

"Yeah, she told me all about that," I huffed as I leaned against the wall again, "She told me how he never loved you. And you punished her for it even though it wasn't her fault. She never cared about the man. She, a ten-year-old child, went over a stupid, worthless man. But you never did. I think that should tell you a thing or two about maturity and all. I know heartbreaks are hard, but there was no reason to punish Y/N. She didn't do anything wrong in the whole situation."

"She existed!" Y/M/N exclaimed, "She ruined me!"

"You could have ended her existence," I spoke, gulping, "You could have aborted. But you didn't. Instead, you made this master plan where you make her into a robot and try to get revenge or whatever you thought you were gonna get. But you ran into a little problem, a little flaw. Me. And, well, you didn't expect Y/N to act the way she did. That's definitely why you're chasing her now. You didn't see it coming and it's killing you and you can't explain yourself to all those people you brag to about how amazing your daughter is."

"As I said, I have no problem with killing you. Her too. So, are we going to work together or are you going to die? Or is it gonna be her who's gonna die? You pick."

"I'll take the rain check," I smirked, knowing she was bluffing. She didn't have a weapon on her. I couldn't spot one, with how light she was dressed, "Maybe some other time."

"You have a family," she spoke up as I walked away. I froze, turning around, anger flailing,

"You don't want to do that."

"Ooh, how scary you are. Who is it going to be, Y/N or your family? I saw how cute your boy is. Shame to shoot that little smile."

"You can't cross the border," I smiled at her, "You can't hurt them. You're a wanted fugitive. No fake names can rub out how ugly you are."

"Well, as much as I'd like to hurt them with my own hands, you're right about that. But then, I have my ways."

"If you try to come at them, there's going to be one big difference in who's chasing you down."

"Oh really? And what is that, sweetie?"

"Y/N," I said, "She doesn't want to have anything with you. But, see, there's something very important about her that you never seemed to notice about her - she loves. She has a big heart that loves with all it has."

"What the fuck are you talking about!?" she exclaimed, making me smile,

"Nothing. Just pointing out something obvious about your daughter that you should have known by now. Now, if you excuse me, I have to get dinner and go back to the set," I said, walking away. As soon as I made it to the street, I hid behind the first object I found, seeing Y/M/N walking away furiously in the opposite direction, where the set was located. I gulped, taking a deep breath before going to the pizzeria.

As I walked out of the pizzeria I could finally answer my phone which went crazy as soon as I ended the call with Jared.

"Dude, for fucks sake! What the hell is going on?!" Jared's worried voice rang on the other end,

"Are you at my place?"

"No, but Misha was there already. I asked him to stay until you come back. What is going on?"

"Y/M/N found me."

"She-are you hurt?!"

"No," I breathed, "I'll be at your place in a few."

I'm greeted with a big moose hug as soon as the door to Jared's apartment flew open. I returned it before entering the apartment, looking around for a second before slamming the door shut and locking them fully,

"Dude, you're white as a sheet," Jared said, guiding me to the couch, "Sit down, breathe. Here," he made a few long steps to his kitchen and gave me a bottle of cold water, "Drink."

"Thanks," I breathed, gulping down the content of it,

"Are you sure you're not hurt?" Jared asked and I nod,

"She hit me in the stomach but nothing bad."

"Fuck, she's been here this whole time," Jared gulped, "What did she want?"

"To persuade me into working with her to get Y/N. Probably bring Y/N back to Y/H/C. I didn't even let her spit out the entire thing. I got sick by just looking at her."

"She's really a stubborn bitch."

"Yeah," I breathed, looking up to Jared, "She threatened."

"She what?"

"Murder," I whispered, "Murder me, Y/N, take your pick."

"What?!" Jared exclaimed, "Is she out of her fucking mind?! Jensen, you have to get security for Danneel and the kids. Cliff will have you and Y/N covered here. And we have to report her too."

"I'll fly Danneel and the kids here," I whispered, "I can't sleep without them all here."

"But the kids are in school," Jared frowned, "And if Y/M/N sees them-"

"I'll think of something. Dee will think of something," I gulped, grabbing my phone, noticing how shaky my hands are, "Fuck. They gotta pack and leave as soon as possible. They might be able to make it by tomorrow morning if they can catch a plane tonight. When I have them within arms reach we will discuss further into their safety."

"Yours too," Jared added, "I'll call Cliff and have him send someone he trusts over to follow Dee and the kids to the airport and Gen to help. Jensen, look at me," Jared tried, making me look up at him, "Everything will be okay."

"Yeah. Yeah," I nod, "Just, be fast. I... I gotta get back to Y/N. She must be worried by now."

"Did Y/M/N follow you here?" Jared asked and I shook my head,

"I told her I'm going back to set."

"Okay. Misha is with Y/N, don't worry. I'll tell him to let her know you'll be late and he'll keep her safe until we make it there."

Not 10 minutes later, Jared and I set everything up. Danneel will fly with the kids over tonight and Cliff and me will pick them up tomorrow morning.

I had to take a quick shower and gather my shit together before going back to Y/N. When I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror I now understood why Jared told me I look white like a sheet.

I shook my head, turning on the faucet. She can't see me scared. She can't know any of what happened tonight. I washed my face, taking deep breaths to calm myself down.

She's gonna be so scared and she might run away again and this isn't downtown Austin and Y/M/N is here too. I can't risk her knowing what went down tonight.

"Hey, Dee and the kids are on the way to the airport. Cliff's friend and Gen are following them. Dee's gonna let us know when they board it and what their arrival time is," Jared informed me as I left the bathroom,

"Okay, yeah, sounds good," I nod, taking a deep breath,

"We should go to Y/N now. Misha is worried too probably."

"Y/N can't know," I spoke up, Jared frowning,

"What? What do you mean, Y/N can't know? Jensen, her mother-"

"I know what she did and that's the exact reason why she can't know," I said, "I'll tell Dee to lie to her, to tell her that there was a problem with the house in Austin and they had to leave here until it's fixed. She simply can't know, brother."

"Jensen, I don't think it's smart to hide this from her."

"I don't want her to run away again!" I yelled out, tears welling in my eyes,

"Jens, hey," Jared walked up to me, giving me a hug, "Brother, she's not going to run away again. She promised me."

"She-she promised me too," I whispered, Jared breaking the hug,

"See? She's not gonna do it again. I know you trust her."

"But I-I don't know what would happen if she found out. What if-what if she tries to find her and turns herself in? Jared, she'd rather suffer than have any of us in danger. I know the lengths she's ready to go to protect the ones she loves. Especially if she heard... "

"Heard what?"

"Her mother said I have a cute little boy," I breathed, "She threatened to kill Zeppelin. If she were to hear that she'd go rampage and hunt her down. She loves that kid more than she loves herself."

"Brother, first of all, she loves you too more than she loves yourself and second of all, no matter who she threatened to kill, Y/N would go rampage. Now, I get what you're saying, but we must be honest with her. Whatever went down, she has to know. She trusts us, more importantly, she trusts you. You have to be honest with her. In this moment you're everything she has. And I am sure she won't try and do anything stupid again. She learned some things that night back in Austin. We gotta trust her to make the right calls and I trust her. I know you trust her too and this is just your fears taking over, which is totally fine, but lying won't solve anything. Come on brother. You're not alone. We'll win this together. Let's go now."

"She can't see I'm scared," I whispered,

"That's bullshit," Jared spoke up, "She's already seen you scared and there's nothing, absolutely nothing you should be ashamed of. She's your kid."

"Exactly. She's my kid. I'm supposed to be strong for her."

"I'd very gladly kick your ass right now," Jared sighed, "She's not gonna think any less of you if she sees you scared, Jens. Showing her this version of yourself, you're sending her a quiet 'I trust you'. She's not a little kid either. There's no reason to lie to her. In any way."

Your POV

You didn't expect to see Misha in your doorway but you surely didn't mind his company. He's a crackhead but also a teddy bear.

You saw him frown at the phone a few times but he didn't mention anything, so you let it be, knowing that if it was something important he'd tell you.

At some point he told you that Jensen will probably run a bit late because he had to do a few things on top of filming. You shrugged your shoulders, knowing that happened sometimes, and you were in his shoes quite a few times.

So, here he is, sitting next to you on the couch as you both watched the documentary in your history class.

As the class ended, the door to the apartment unlocked and you smiled as you turned around and saw Jensen and Jared enter the apartment. Jared carried some pizza, and Misha immediately jumped from the couch, helping him, but you couldn't miss Jensen's pale, scared face.

Jensen couldn't miss the frown you made and he's fast to make a few long steps and give you a bone-crushing hug. You returned it, letting him hug you for as long as he needed to.

When he let go, Jared was the next one to give you a hug and you now found this behavior rather suspicious. The three sat down on the couch and you came up to them and found a spot right next to Jensen,

"Guys. What's going on here?" you asked, looking at everyone for a few seconds before locking your eyes on Jensen, "First, Mish just comes in and makes weird faces at his phone, then you're late from filming and then Jare shows up with you. Is something wrong?" Jensen gulped, looking down.

Chills ran down your spine.

"Did she hurt you?" you asked but Jensen kept quiet, "Did she hurt Dee or the kids?" he didn't respond, "ANSWER ME!" you yelled out, abruptly standing up.

"No," Jensen's voice was quieter than a whisper and you could have missed it if you weren't looking at him. The way he hunched over himself and made himself as small as possible didn't give you any good feelings. You slapped Jared's hand off as he was biting his nails and he smiled sadly at you. You kept looking him in the eye, waiting for some sort of words to come out, to tell you something, anything that Jensen hid so well, but Jared shook his head. He didn't want to tell you. He wanted Jensen to be the one to tell you.

So, you sat down on the ground, facing Jensen as you crossed your legs and made yourself as small as possible, finally being able to see his face. He gulped, just looking at you and you nudged his leg gently,

"Jense. What happened?"

"She found me."

You froze, but took a deep breath,

"She hurt you, didn't she?" you asked, standing up and pushing Jensen to sit straight, "Where?" you asked but Jensen shook his head. You grabbed the collar of his hoodie, "Jense. Where?"

"She didn't hurt me," he whispered. You looked to Jared who didn't say anything, again.

"Then what did she say? What did she want?" you asked, letting go of Jensen's collar,

"You don't want to know," he whispered,

"I very much want to know," you responded, "Come on. Talk to me. You're upset and scared. Did she threaten to kill me?"

"Amongst other things," he whispered,

"What other things?" you asked,

"Uh, can we go back for a second to the part where she said she's going to kill you?" Misha pointed out but you shook your head,

"No. I don't care about that right now. At least not until I hear the rest."

"She said I have a pretty son," he whispered, finally looking up to your eyes,

"She..." you gulped, grabbing your phone, "I gotta call Dee. Jare, ask someone Cliff trusts to guard their home. I-"

"They're flying here," Jared spoke up, "Dee and the kids. They boarded the plane half an hour ago."

"Fuck," you breathed, "Fucking fuck. I told you," you said as you began to pace around the room, "I told you that you'll be in danger if you kept me. See, now she's threatening Zeppelin! If she just thinks about threatening you too I'm going to find her and kill her and I don't care about the sentence I get."

"Jensen," Jared warned, making you look to him and see Jensen shake his head in a negative answer, a tear rolling off the bridge of his nose, his head still bowed down. It took you a moment before you realized why Jared had that reaction,

"She threatened you too, didn't she?" you whispered, "She threatened to hurt you."

"Kiddo, please," Jensen breathed as he stood up and came up to you, getting a hold of your shoulders, "Please, don't..."

"She didn't say she was gonna kill you, did she?"

"It doesn't matter what she said."

"She said she's gonna kill you," you whispered.

You didn't know what to do.

Your mind kept going to running away, but you promised. You promised Jensen and Jared not to do that again. You can't break their hearts, the trust they have in you.

But then the face Jensen sported hit you like a train and the only thing you thought of in that given moment was to slam your body into his, squeezing him into a tight hug.

You felt his arms wrap around you and you shook your head as tears began to fall and the threats kept repeating in your head. You could hear her say it, you could hear her say it in every language she knew, in every expressive way she had up her dirty sleeve. You could see her, clear as day, as she spoke those words, as she threatened to kill two people you loved more than yourself.

"She-she can't kill you. She-she can't hurt Zepp or-or anyone else," you began, not even knowing how long did the silence last, "I-I have to give her what she wants."

Jensen's arms only wrapped tighter around you and you could feel his head shake in a negative answer by the way he leaned his chin on the top of your head,

"Not in hell you're doing that," Misha spoke up, "She's gonna have to go through all of us if she wants to get you."

"That's the exact problem I have!" you yelled out, breaking Jensen's hold, "I don't care about what she's got planned for me. What I have nightmares about all the fucking time is her hurting all of you! Because she knows I hurt the most when people I love hurt. She knows me, Misha! And she has no problem with killing anyone if it meant that she's gonna get her hands on me. I'm not willing to sacrifice any of you or the kids. If she wants me that bad then she will get me."

"No!" Jared exclaimed, "We never thought about the fact that she might be bluffing, or something else."

"She's not bluffing," you breathed, "You don't know her. She's insane. Insane enough to kill. She's killed before. And I don't want you to die."

"She killed before?" Jensen breathed and you gulped,

"I can't say for sure but I think she could have saved my grandpa when he was dying," you turned to look at Jensen whose eyes were glued on you, "And that little fact, that's why we can't keep this up anymore."

"We can," he whispered, "We can and we will. Just don't leave."

"Jensen, I have to."

"No you don't," he breathed, "Maybe Jared's right. Maybe she's bluffing. To scare us, to scare you. To make you come to her. She's a master manipulator."

"I... I don't know what to believe anymore," you whispered, running your hands through your hair, "It's the safest option we have right now."

"Do you trust us?" Misha spoke up and you moved your look to him, "Trust Jared, me?" you nod, "Trust your dad?" you nod again, "Then trust us when we tell you that everything will be okay. It might hurt a whole lot and it might take a while to get to that point, but we're gonna get to the point where everything is okay. You just have to trust us."

"Do you think it's worth it?" you asked, looking down, "All this? For me? For a stupid human?"

"You're my kiddo. Not a stupid human," Jensen whispered, giving you a warm hug, "No matter how old you get, no matter what it says on a stupid piece of paper, no matter what tomorrow brings. You're worth everything."

"Your real family is in danger because of me."

"You didn't tell your mother to kill them, did you?" Misha asked and you violently shook your head when Jensen let you go, "Then how is it your responsibility?"

You were about to respond but Jensen's phone rang. He looked at it, seeing Rich's phone number,

"Take it," you whispered, looking at Misha who nod, walking away to another room with Jensen. You stayed behind with Jared.

"She took it too far," you whispered, "I don't care if she were to kill me. But she threatened my dad and my baby brother. What do I do?" you asked Jared, tears quietly rolling down your cheeks, "He's so scared. Mom too, for sure. You and Mish too. Fuck me, I'm scared. How do I make this right? How do I fix this?"

"Stay here with us and keep up with your promise," he reminded you and you nod, gulping, "Mish and I will stay the night here. Cliff's on his way, he'll stay alert and we can all get some sleep. Stay with Jensen for me. Please."

Misha walked out of the room and towards you, giving you a warm hug for a few moments before nodding you to Jensen's room. You nod, walking away quietly,

"There's some of Jensen's shirts in the dryer. Help yourself."

"Don't worry about us," Jared smiled, "Night, munchkin."

"Night, angel," Misha added,

"Night guys. And thanks."

You walked into Jensen's room, to where he was sitting, at the side of the bed, his head leaning against his palms, his elbows digging into his knees. You moved his arms away and hugged him tightly, Jensen returning it immediately. Your heart shattered at the sob he let out, taking you back to that night in Austin from a few months back and the aftermaths you faced.

"Don't run away," Jensen whispered as he clutched the back of your shirt and you shook your head, "I'll do everything. Just don't run away."

"I promised not to do that again. I want to leave, but only if you know and agree, which doesn't seem to be the case right now."

"Please, don't," he choked out, "Please."

"I won't. I'm staying here, with you."

"We-we just have to stick together," he murmured, "Just stay close to each other and we'll be safe. No way she's getting her hands on any of us - hey, shhh," he shushed you as you sobbed.

You knew the stunt with running away you pulled a few months back hurt Jensen, but you didn't know he was this scared of you running away again. And that, as a cherry on top of this shitshow of a cake, just made you lose it altogether,

"She's not going to hurt us. Y/N, look at me. Please, look at me," he begged and you had to do as told, meeting his swollen, red eyes, "I know how much you love us. You might not say it with words but knowing that you're ready to sacrifice your life to protect us tells me more than you think. I know how much you love us and I assure you, she's not gonna hurt me or Zeppelin."

"He's just an innocent kid," you whispered, "And you didn't ask to be a part in any of this."

"Hey, you said it yourself," Jensen sniffled, tugging at the sleeve of his hoodie and wiping your tears, "You said it yourself, she knows how to get to you. She didn't have a weapon. She dragged me into an alley but all she did was hit me in the stomach once. She threatened to kill me right there but she didn't have a weapon."

"She has one back in Y/H/C. What if she brought it in?"

"There's no way she could have," Jensen shook his head, "Only weapon she could get is a kitchen knife."

"That's more than enough to harm people."

"That's not the point I'm trying to make," he said, "I'm trying to tell you that she's not going to hurt us because she's bluffing. She didn't have balls to hit me again. She retracted as soon as I pushed her away. She was scared. I told her we're not as stupid as she takes us for and something in her expression changed and she became more reserved."

"She's not scared, just waiting to bait you. If you were to make a move, she'd report you to the police. And that would throw all of your work to get into the foster care system down the drain and she'd win."

"Well, she's got nothing to report me for because I just gently pushed her away in self-defense. She's not going to hurt us and she's not going to win. Dee and the kids will be here until this all is sorted out and until you become an Ackles."

"You know that might not happen."

"It will happen one way or another. Besides, I don't care what a stupid paper says. You're an Ackles and that's a done deal," Jensen said, finally breaking a soft smile, "We're gonna win. We're scared and that's okay. And what we feel is okay too and there's no shame in that. But we'll win. Just like Mish said. It might take a while, it might hurt, but we will win."

"I love you," you whispered, going to hug him again, "I love you so much."

"I love you too, kiddo," he said, squeezing you tight to his chest, "She's not gonna get us. She doesn't have one important thing."

"What?"

"Love," he smiled, kissing your temple. "She isn't driven by love. She might as well stick her money, fame, and insults where the Sun shines. Love will win. Always."

"Thank you," you said, burrowing your head into his shoulder, "For everything you do."

"There's nothing to thank me for, kiddo. It's my job to protect you."

A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY @crasmuna ONCE AGAIN, HERE'S A BELATED BDAY PRESENT FROM ME TO YOU (don't kill me pls (but then if you do you won't find out what happens hehe)) SINCE YOU LIVE SO FUCKING FAR AWAY AND I CAN'T GIFT YOU AN ACTUAL PRESENT AND GIVE YOU A HUG. Thanks for being there for me and keep being the amazing human being you are!!! Oh, also, we're in our 20s, when are we talking about options for nursery homes?

[jawritter]

The Arrangement

Part 6

Summery: You are a young girl that was raised in a small church in Dallas, TX. One of the only churches left in the state that still practices arranged marriages. When your betrothed ran off to California you thought you'd escape the fate you were trained for ever since a small child. Now upon the death your parents your fate seemed to be inescapable as he's returned, and is ready to take you as his bride.

Book Warnings: Arranged marriage, loss of virginity, smut, unprotected sex, angst, language, suicide attempt, battles with anxiety, struggles with mental illness, age gap (about 11 years), I think that’s it, chapters will have warnings of their own!

Chapter Warnings: Nothing really, feels and tooth rooting fluff.

Word Count: 1897

A/N: This book is a book about Christian and church based arranged marriages, I would like to take this moment to say that I DO NOT have ANYTHING against the Chirstian faith, and mean absolutely no harm to anyone! Especially Jensen’s family! This is a complete work of fiction, and should be treated as such!

Beta’d by the amazing @deanwanddamons who was awesome enough to do all this for me! It was a lot of work, and she deserves all the praise for it!!

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x Reader

Want More? Check Out My Masterlist!!

***MASTERLIST***

***SERIES MASTERLIST***

Jensen's POV:

A loud crack of thunder woke Jensen up as it rolled overhead. He automatically tightened his grip on Y/Nl aying next to him, pulling her sleeping body closer to his in hopes of keeping the storm that was rolling outside from waking her.

She'd been through a lot, and as much as she tried to hide it yesterday, he was afraid all of yesterday's events had taken their toll on her. Even though he was thinking about driving back to Austin earlier than planned, he quickly saw last night that she was going to need some time to recover, even if she didn't want to admit it to him.

What was concerning him more than anything, were his own feelings that he was already developing toward the young woman laying soundly asleep in his arms.

He shouldn't already be feeling these things. Hell they'd only really just meet yesterday! He didn't understand why he worried over her so much, why every time she nuzzled closer to him in her sleep his heart would skip a beat. Why every time he kissed her, it felt like he could fly around the room.

If Jensen was to be completely honest with himself, he’d never been in love with someone, and he knew it. The marriage with Danneel was nothing but a PR disaster that took 10 years to fall apart. Every other relationship he'd ever had never lasted long enough for him to develop feelings for anyone.

Right now with Y/N nuzzled into him as close as was possible, he was pretty sure he was already falling head over heels for her. One thing he was certain though, was he'd never felt this way about anyone before.

Another roll of thunder overhead and you stirred in his arms. Jensen froze, waiting to see if you were going to wake up. When you didn't, he reached over and grabbed his phone to look through his messages. Five were from Jared.

He was concerned for him, and Jensen knew it, but this was something that he just had to do. He needed this. He needed someone that would be faithful to him, someone that could learn to hopefully love him,  not just use him to get whatever they wanted from people, and exploit his pocket book.

Every woman he'd ever been with had only wanted him for their 15 minutes of fame, or what he could buy them. They never really loved him.

Y/n, being raised as she was, didn't really care about the money, and she definitely didn't want to be in the spotlight. They were trained against it. Jared was lucky when he found Gen. Why didn't he deserve to find the same thing?

Your POV:

A loud bang of thunder followed by a  crack of lightning woke you up with a start. As soon as you jumped, Jensen tightened his arms around you.

"It's okay baby I got you." he whispered, pulling you impossibly close to his warm body while you tried to control your breathing. You had been asleep hard and honestly, had slept harder than you'd slept in a long time. Which meant it took a few minutes for you to catch up with your surroundings, and your current situation. 

You didn't know if it was from exhaustion, or from the fact that for some unexplained reason you felt safe in Jensen's arms. Safer than you'd ever felt in your life, that you just crashed last night. 

"What time is it?" you finally mumbled, laying there listening to the rain pound down on the roof and windows above the two of you. It was peaceful. The storm raging outside, the comfortable dark bedroom, and Jensen wrapped up as close as possible with you. It was the closest to heaven you'd think you'll ever get here on earth.

Even though you knew you shouldn't be feeling these things this early, you couldn't help it. There was something about Jensen that just made you feel complete, whole in a sense, especially after the loss of everything that was close to you.

"Little after 10, I say we just stay right here today sweetheart, you need to rest, you've been through a lot. Let's just stay in bed all day, and get used to just being with each other. There’s no rush to get back to Austin."

You couldn't help the stupid smile that plastered across you face. 

"That sounds great to me." you tell him, stretching in his arms a little as Jensen’s eyes shamelessly racked over what of your body that was exposed to him. Your body immediately protested against the movement, soreness racking through you. Jensen didn't miss the fact that you winced slightly.

"Let me go draw you a bath sweetheart, It'll help." Jensen said, he looked worried.

"You know I'm supposed to be the one pampering you, not the other way around. I didn't even wake up early enough to fix you breakfast this morning. So far I suck at this."

You really did feel like you'd failed. You couldn’t get used to the thought of him wanting to take care of you. You should have already been out of bed, breakfast fixed, and packed so that he could go home, instead of staying here another night, spending more of the money that didn’t belong to you.

You were always taught that it was your job as a wife to be a help mate, to cook, to clean, to make a comfortable home, to raise a family, all this to make your husband's life better. You were there to serve him. Not the other way around.

"Y/n, you do NOT suck at this. I don't need you to cater to my every whim. I'm a big boy, If I get hungry before you wake up I know where the kitchen is. You're not my slave you know." he said, running his fingers through your hair, before lightly grazing over your neck with his lips, his breath ghosting over your skin, causing an involuntary shiver to run through you.

You didn't understand why his touch affected you so, but it did. One small little gesture that he didn't even realize he was doing and you were putty in his hands.

"I just don't want you to be stuck with someone like me. Who not only is WAY  out of your league, but can't even get off her ass, and do what she is supposed to for you."

Jensen propped up on his elbow, looking at you like you'd popped out a third head. You shook your own head and moved to get out of the bed. His hand reached out, and grabbed your arm, pulling you as close to him as possible, before laying you both back down, and pulling the covers over you.

"What do you mean, 'WAY out of  my league?' You're not way out of  anything? I married you because I chose to. No one forced me, no one twisted my arm. I knew what you looked like before you even walked into the church yesterday. I was well informed on any, and everything that has gone on with you since I left for California. Baby you're not way out of my league."

Leaning down, he placed a sweet kiss to your lips softly, just barely moving his mouth over yours.

"Y/n, you and I are equals. I'm not any better than you are. I don't see myself as something you're not. I want us to be partners in this relationship. Like I said last night. I want a real marriage with you. Not just some arrangement of convenience. I'm not going to lord over you, or anything like that. I'm not going to expect you to walk around like my little slave girl, who's only job is to wait on me hand and foot and fuck me. Sorry, that's not what I wanted."

Leaning down he kissed you again, this time slipping his tongue through your lips without any effort at all, exploring your mouth lazily for a while before breaking the kiss again.

"Now, I'm going to go run you a warm bath, then I'm going to make us so coffee while you're soaking, then we're going to eat a shit ton of junk food, and watch Netflix all day while cuddling here in this bed.   Sound like a plan?” 

You couldn't help but giggle at his serious face, and those perfect, pink, pouty lips.

"Okay, okay..." you tell him, sitting up and watching him make his way toward the bathroom to start running your bath.

"And don't bother about putting  clothes on. You're not going to need them." he said, giving you a playful wink before disappearing into the bathroom. The sounds of water running erupted through the room.

------------------------------------------------------------------

A little over five hours and the only thing that had been accomplished was one very relaxing bath which did seem to help a great deal with your sore muscles, and several Netflix serious episodes, which you couldn’t even tell what was on the tv. Jensen kept your mouth busy with his like a couple of teenagers, hands exploring each other's bodies as you lay there, cuddled into each other, wrapped up as tight as you could physically manage.

To say the least this is not what you expected out of an arranged marriage, with all the horror stories and things you had heard. You expected something along the lines of a sex crazed, slave driver, that wanted nothing more than to pound you into the mattress, and have you wait on him hand over fist.

Jensen was the exact opposite so far. He was gentle with you, and he took his time with you. Even though you were lying there next to him, both of you completely naked, he never pushed you to sleep with him, never did anything to make you uncomfortable in the least. There was no rush. He was patient, and content just to lay there and kiss you.

You talked about everything you could think of. Childhood memories, things he's experienced over the last 10 years, what you expected out of life, what your dreams and goals were, what you both wanted in a home.

You both laid there like until long after the sun went down. 

You felt like you knew him a little better than you did when you met him at the church yesterday, and to be honest, you were already head over heels for him.

Every time he smiled, it damn near knocked the wind out of you. Your skin felt alive under his touch in a way you'd never experienced before. So far, Jensen had far surpassed his expectations. That, you were secretly thankful for.

Learning to do this with each other definitely wouldn't be easy, but you were confident that you were both talking a step in the right directions.

One thing you were sure of. You were already completely, irrationally, and  irrevocably in love with him. 

Hopefully you weren't going crazy, and he actually felt the same way. You'd never been a fan of love at first sight. You'd never believed it existed.

Right now, laying here wrapped up in his arms, you were starting to think maybe this whole marriage thing wouldn't be as bad as they talked about before.

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Tag List: @deanwanddamons​ @imabitch4jensen​ @rvgrsbrns​ @bi-danvers0​ @onethirstyunicorn​ @i-love-superhero​ @akshi8278​ @lyss-dw79​ @magssteenkamp​ @lemondropirwin​ @squirrelnotsam​ @hobby27​ @spnbaby-67​ @mrsjenniferwinchester​ @defenderrosetyler​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​ @thecreatiivecorner​  @aflamboyanceofgays @vicmc624​ @busy-bee-angel-misska​ @justanotherwinchester​ @brilovesdeanwinchester​ @idksupernatural​ @lyarr24​ @amandamdiehl​

[carryonmywaywardwriters]

One Day At A Time - Jensen x Reader

A/N: Part Six! If you’d like to be tagged, please send an ask or message. As always, feedback is incredible. And, I hope you all enjoy <3

PSA: I am NOT a minor friendly blog. If you are below 18, please come back when you’re older. I don’t want to lose my blog because you were too eager to grow up. If I discover you, I WILL block.

Series Masterlist

Warnings: Widower!Jensen. Unrequited feelings. Sexual awareness. Guilt. Use of a currently nonsingle actress, but I love her. So...she’s here. Next chapter starts the steamy side of things ;)

Word Count: Roughly 2,900

The set was solemn as you walked onto it. Two sets of tiny hands tangled with yours as a third held onto your hip. Making your way to the guillotine slowly. Aware that cameras were rolling just around the bend.  

“And we just wanted you to hear from us that, um...” Jensen's voice was strong as Jared cleared his throat beside him. However, as you approached, you saw the strain all three men were under. All eyes were red. Puffy from the tears. The other two hunched around Jensen as if he were their rock. “Although we're excited about er...next year? Um...I...It will be, uh...” He looked towards Misha. Arms crossed over his chest as he talked, “the finale.”

Suddenly, you'd understood why Jared had texted you. Suggesting that the kids may be the boost Jensen needed to get through the day. Your heart broke all over again as a sniffle echoed from the side. Another broken crew member trying to hold themselves together.

No one made said a word as the men finished the beginning of their goodbye to their life's longest work. As soon as they were done? Applause rang through the air. The support in the room overwhelming with its intensity.

“Is Daddy okay?” Arrow's voice was soft as she watched in confusion. Brows pinched together tightly.

You didn't get a chance to answer before Justice Jay spoke up, “No...he's sad.” Her eyes moved up to meet yours. “But, Y/N will make him feel better. That's what she does.”

“Go hug him, Y/N!” Zeppelin insisted, lips tugged down. Upset at his father's pain.

“That's your job, kiddo.” Ruffling his hair, you urged them forward. It didn't take much prodding. As soon as the green eyes caught sight of the three children rushing his way, they lit up.

Your hands stuffed into your back pockets as you followed. Keeping your distance. As if they'd truly not let you be part of the fray. Jared tugged you under his arm as soon as you were within reach. Rubbing his knuckles into your hair affectionately. “Nice of you to answer your texts.”

“I figured you were on set,” A pinch to his ribs gave you a rewarding yelp from the giant. But, the glee only lasted a moment. “How're you holding up?” Growing serious, you looked up at the overgrown child. Fingers cocked under his chin to make sure he didn't turn away from your gaze.

“I'll be alright,” The shadows under his eyes said otherwise. But, the grumbling from Misha had you passed around before you could protest. Demanding a real answer.

Jensen watched as you were lifted into the bubbly man's grasp. Laughing at your long lost friend. Misha had a thing about adopting the unusual. And you fit right into the pack.

“Daaaaaad!” The drawn out cry forced his attention back to Zeppelin as both girls snuck off to hunt down the makeup crew and demand their annual glitz and glammer day. “You need to hug, Y/N!”

“I...I ne...need to what?” His held tilted as he crouched down to his son's level. To not only talk man on man, but to ensure his voice didn't carry as far.

“She gives nice hugs. She'll make you feel better.” Earnest as always, the boy tugged on his hand. Concern etched on his mini's brow as he stormed on in his mission. “Trust me, I know.”

“Oh, do you?” A firm nod was the answer. Lips puckered as he inspected the red in his father's eyes. “I bet you learned to give some pretty great hugs yourself, then.”

“They're okay.” The tiny shrug brushed it off. Still zeroed in on the idea that you'd save the day. Kicking at the ground all the while.

Jensen chuckled before reaching out to tug the boy into his arms. Zeppelin let out a giggle for the ages as he wrapped his tiny arms into a vice grip around the thick neck in front of him. “See? Told you.”

His eyes closed as he breathed in the moment. Squeezing his son tight. As if that would hold his life together. When they opened again, the E/C gaze was on him. A small nod your way said it all. An answering bob his way had his lips pulled up.

The day passed by in a blur of emotion. Social medias were lighting up from the announcement. Fans around the world mourning as much as the cast and crew. All three kids were out cold. Tucked into their beds in the lavish apartment. Sighing, you settled down on the couch. Rubbing at your eyes sleepily.

“Hey,” You yawned out without even looking as Jensen walked in. A muttered curse and small crash followed as he tried to tug his footwear off without bending. When you turned to see if he would make it, you found him looking worse than you felt. “I was starting to think you got lost.”

“Long day.” That much you understood. Slowly, you patted the tan material of the couch beside you. As he sank down into the fabric with a deep sigh, you passed him your own unopened beer. Knowing just a bit of relaxation made up for some of the struggles. “Thanks.”

“You good?”

“Not really.” The defeated huff had you looking over every line on his face. You knew the strained expression well. Grief had risen its head again. “I'm just tired. I'll be fine.” Silence stretched between you two. Tense and heavy. Then, the dam burst. Only, it was the furthest thing you'd expected to hear. “I've got a date next week.”

Excitement was the last thing you felt at those words. But, you weren't what was important in that moment. “You don't sound very happy about it.”

“Aren't you supposed to say 'congratulations' or something like that?” He huffed out. Surliness over ruling the sad. “Ya know, supportive?”

“I was just making an observation.” The unimpressed frown had you letting out your own, exasperated breath of air. “Okay, okay, fine. I'll leave that alone.” Against your better judgment, you crossed your legs. Turning to face him better, you decided if you were going to play the role of therapist? You might as well do it properly. Start where he wanted to. “Who's the girl?”

“Gemma Chan.” As you pulled out your phone, the head tilt of confusion was aimed your way. “What-”

“If I have to do the encouraging friend thing? I gotta do what women do best...research.” Captain Marvel. Crazy Rich Asians. She was bigger screen than him, certainly. Gorgeous. Just a few years younger than his forty three years. Single for a little over a year. There wasn't anything notable to find fault with, there. “Damn... how'd you land her?”

“Cliff had Jared and Gen set me up.” When your brow lifted in question, he diverted from the details further. Skittering back to where he wanted it. Only telling you in more ways that he was hiding at least one thing. “Anyways, I could use more of that support stuff right about now.” He waved you on.

“She seems like...a lot.” His exasperation at your answer was quickly cut off by the rest. “But, you're great, Jensen. Okay? You have the perfect kids. A hell of a resume of your own. Don't look half bad...” The last one earned the breathy, sheepish chuckle you'd been going for. His chin tucking down to touch his chest as his hand ran through his hair. “Even if it doesn't work out? It's not the end of the line. There's a whole world out there outside of this one girl.” A gentle squeeze of his bicep had him straightening up on the couch, “And if you're worried about what Danneel would think?” He hid it well. But, you caught the flash of it at the name. Vulnerability. He was losing his show. But, with the date? He was also losing another tie to his dead wife. You were certain that the pain you'd seen stemmed from all that loss. “Don't, Jay... She'd just want you and the kids happy. Okay? That's the goal, here.” He swallowed tightly. Nodding in agreement. “Good.”

--

“What do ya think?” Jensen turned to the small crowd on the black couch; showing off the brown leather jacket and black tie combo he'd thrown together over jeans.

“It's a no from me.” Justice Jay had no qualms about speaking her mind. She leaned back into the couch with a squinted up expression that looked so much like her mom that you had to bite back a smile. The whole thing was pulled off perfectly with the neon green head band she'd taken from her mom's closet years before. Offsetting the pink t-shirt she'd just grown into.

“Arrow?” Size had nothing to do with personality. The tiny little beauty had dressed herself in a pair of overalls. A bright yellow shirt rested under the jeans. Too loud pink frilled around her from the tutu wrapped around her hips. A red and a black sock covered her swinging feet. Neon green sunglasses rested on her nose. In order to bring the outfit together, she donned a sky blue bow in her fine hair. Looking every bit as solemn as she could, the tiny, rainbow themed child shook her head no; lips pursed into a frown. “Oh, who asked you?” The grumble earned a giggle that made Jensen roll his eyes. “What about you, Zep?”

“Dad...” The actor's mini-me stated very seriously. Folding his hands onto his grass stained knee. Oblivious to the ravioli crested dinosaur on his chest. “I love you.” That earned a raised brow. “But,” Kid or not, Zeppelin went right for the throat, “you need to work on your style.”

It was as if they'd all stabbed him through the heart. His hand rubbed over his chest. Brows furrowed as he took in the beings he'd helped create. Their own fashion statements blasphemy to the outside world as they shot him down. “You're all monsters.”

“It's just casual, right?” You asked from your perch on the floor. Turning away from the puzzle the kids had abandoned half an hour before to save the last shred of dignity on the actor.

“Right,” He was full of nervous energy. Shifting from foot to foot as you inspected his choice in clothes. His squared jaw was smooth from the fresh shave. Too spic and span for your liking.

“Lose the tie, drop a few buttons, and channel Dean. You'll be golden.” With that, you moved back to the puzzle. Forgetting about anymore of that extra bit encouragement he'd asked for when he'd told you about the night out. A deep tug of a frown graced his lips.

Jensen watched the way your fingers trailed across the pieces of cardboard. Pulling together the image of a raven carefully. The same way you seemed to go forward with everything. When did you ever really let loose in your life? Even a little?

“Dad! You're still blocking the TV,” Arrow finally spoke up. Not wanting to miss a second of her precious Rapunzel. Pulling him from his thoughts.

“Right,” He turned away, tugging off the offending tie like you'd suggested. Glancing at the clock to his right, again. The night was supposed to change his life. Get his mind back to reality instead of every lewd image it'd created of the nanny, as Cliff had said. His bodyguard had laid out the perfect plan. It was just a matter of pursuing it. “Alright, there's an hour until bed time-”

“Yes, daddy.” A mocking tone was nothing compared to the words themselves. His breath caught in his throat. The very reason he'd found himself about to go out lingering in the air. “I know the routine,” You chastised without looking his way. Sounding more like an exasperated mother than a nanny. “Go. Have fun on...” You glanced back his way. Knowing that he wasn't ready to let the kids in on what was happening. Quickly, you fixed your wrong. “With your friend.”

Unbuttoning the first two buttons of his shirt, Jensen walked away. Muttering to himself to quell the nerves. It didn't stop as he paced to locate his phone and keys. Didn't even end when he shouted a final goodbye.

When the door finally shut behind him, you let out your breath. In Austin, you could escape his allure easier. Remind yourself that while they cared for you, you were ultimately a side piece in the family. But, in Canada? Things were more cramped. Intimate.

Hanging out on set. In the trailers. Being in the next room over from the father you needed to escape at nights. Torture didn't begin to describe it. So close. And yet, ever out of reach.

The announcement of the ending had only drawn more attention towards the cast and their families. Everyone trying to see what came next. And with that? Came the attacks.

Every kind of conspiracy theory existed. You'd be the next beard for J2. The cast and crew didn't give two shits about your existence, but needed the attention your closeness to Jensen could give them. How you used Jay's grief to trap him into some kind of toxic web. Posts existed about which child you favored and why. Bets on who'd end up in boarding school once the show ended.

You should have ignored them. None of them had any credibility. There wasn't one of them who could say they knew any of you personally. And yet, every one of them dug under your skin. Settling into a poisonous knot in your stomach.

Worriedly, you turned back to the door. Imagining what would happen if he were caught by a photographer. TMZ had eaten his wife's death up. Announcing it a mere hour after it had happened. A grieving widower moving on would be the perfect desert for them.

Shaking away the thoughts, you got to your feet. Ignoring the way Oscar's head shot up at the jerky movement. Sitting around and waiting was useless. There were things to clean. Time to kill.

Ten minutes after tucking the kids into bed, you heard the door click open. Icarus' head lifted from your lap as you turned to see Jensen stroll in. Looking like he'd been through the ringer. For the second time in the span of days, you found yourself about to nurture the head of the house.

“What happened?”

“Nothing.” He sighed out. Unzipping his jacket sharply. When it was off, he tossed it haphazardly across the room. Not caring that it landed on the floor.

“Right...” The dirty look you got made you roll your eyes. You picked up the aging cockapoo from your lap. Moving close to the grumpy giant, and placing the snowy pooch in his owner's arms. “Sit down. Cuddle the dog. I'll be right back.”

“Wha-”

“Just do it, Ackles. Trust me!” You ordered. Walking away to raid the kitchen. A few minutes later, you found him less agitated. His hands running over the freshly groomed coat as he rested on the couch. “Take this. And then when you're ready? Spill the dirt.” Your legs tucked under you as you passed him a mug of tea.

“Thanks,” His voice was still gruff. But most of the tension had left his shoulders. After a moment, he finally opened up. Venting about the awkward silence. The pained, overly polite smiles. Everything that fit the fating scene. “Maybe it's too soon,” Jensen leaned back against the couch. Making himself cozy in the habit that had developed between you two.

“Or maybe she just wasn't right for you,” It was a relief to say it. But, you felt for the guy all the same. Dating sucked. “Or,” Being the good guy sucked even more, “maybe she was just as nervous as you were.” He seemed to think that one over. Nodding as if he agreed. “Drink up, kid. You have work tomorrow.”

“Thanks for reminding me,” He groaned out, taking another sip of hot liquid. “So...what about you?”

It was ridiculous how many butterflies swarmed inside of you when his eyes turned your way, “What about me?”

“You aren't gonna find someone if you never go out,” At that, your shoulders drooped a bit. Plopping back against the couch in an almost pout. “It's true, ya know.”

“I know,” You refused to look over at him. Pondering over everything. “What made you decide it was time?” The question had been just another thing eating at you.

“I just...” He wouldn't explain it all. Couldn't. That'd involve coming clean about every look your way. “I miss the little things, ya know? Waking up to a smiling face and all that jazz. I don't...” His throat worked as he talked. “I don't wanna be alone.”

Silently you absorbed everything he'd said. The fragile crack in his voice. Pain in each note. Relating to it more than he knew. Me either, Jay...Me either.

Part Seven

Forever: @dean-winchesters-bacon​ @supernaturalginger​ @lilulo-12​ @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​ @michaelneedssomemilk​ @lemondropirwin​ @fanfictionismydeath​ @neii3n​

Dean/Jensen: @akshi8278​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​  @woodworthti666​ @coldmuffinbanditshoe

ODAAT: @winchester-ofthe-lord @smoothdogsgirl @ima-be-a-mongoose @briagallen @agusdoti @my-proof-is-you @deanwinchestersmydaddy @sucker-for-dean @blacktithe7 @thevelvetseries @sucker-for-dean  @sociopathtime @deans-baby-momma @aomi-nabi​ @brandinicole911 @demonqueen47 @c-ly-g @bakabozza @socalgem1124​ @hillface89​ @winchester-fantasies​ @redwineloves​ @monkeymcpoopoo​ @mcshloemer @hillface89​ @chocolateheart

[thevelvetseries]

At Ease Marine

Summary : After being in the Navy for 2 years the oldest Padalecki finally comes home from her mission and finally gets to see her family for the first time in person in 2 years and she couldn’t be happier.

Pairings : Jared Padalecki x Daughter Reader / Genevieve Padalecki x Daughter Reader

Warnings : Fluff, Angst, Family Love

A/N : I have changed the ages of the Padalecki children Tom 16 / Shep 15 / Odette 10

Masterlist

It had been nearly 2 years since I had seen my family in person. I’m Y/N Padalecki, I’m currently 21 years old. I signed up to join the Navy when I was 18 behind my parents back I guess you could say. It’s not like I needed their permission to sign up and once I told them I can feel you know that it didn’t go down a treat at all. My parents where a little upset with me, my father didn’t talk to me for a few days all because I wanted to sever my country and look after it. However, this was something that I needed to do. I wanted to serve and protect my country. It’s not like they couldn’t of seen it coming. Even as a little child I would always say things like I want to help my country and I would always watch army films, I know ironic. I just loved helping people, and I was always fascinated by people stories of why they joined the Army or Navy. So when I told my patents and grandparents at the same time after a family dinner things didn’t really go to plan. I should of know they were going to b a little upset and confused. I spent the day nervous waiting for the perfect time to tell everyone my big little secret. So one Saturday after we finished having a family dinner and we were all relaxing in the family room I decided it was time to tell everyone what I had been hiding from them for the past month and it went a little something like this.

~ Flashback ~

We were just finishing up dinner, mum and grandma had just made a delicious roast dinner and now we were sitting in the living room relaxing, letting our food go down. We were currently watching a movie that Tom wanted to watch. We were coming to the end of the movie when I finally got enough courage to tell my family what I was planning to do with the rest of my life. I took a deep breath and untangled myself from the blanket I was under and slowly got up from the sofa and walking to stand in front of the TV. That’s when everyone looked up at me.

“I need to tell you all something important.” I say while standing up straight to make myself seem bigger than I actually am.

“You know you can tell us anything sweetie.” Mum said while pausing the TV so I had everyone’s attention and they didn’t miss the ending of the movie.

“So, I’ve been doing some thing lately about what I want too with the rest of my life and I’ve come to a decision about what I want to do. I’ve already done something and that something will change this family for awhile I will say, probably forever.” I say while looking at both my parents.

“What you talking about sweetie?” My dad asks while turning his head a little to the side.

The 5 seconds I’m silent for seems like a lifetime. I was about to tell them what I did while the thought I was “away looking at a college” two weeks ago when I was not . I could hear my heart beating in my chest.

“Remember when I said I wanted to go to that college open weekend the other week, and you let me go. What if I told you that was a lie so cover up what I really was going to do that weekend.” I say.

“What you talking about?” My dad says in a stern voice.

“What I mean is that I didn’t go to the college, I act went to a course to see I soemthing was the right fit for me and turns out it was and I dec that I was going to sign up to join the Navy, and I did” I say. Nobody spoke. However, I felt free. I wasn’t ashamed of what I was going to do. This is something that I’ve always wanted to do and they weren’t going to o be able to stop me.

“What do you mean you signed up to join the Navy?” Dad said while scooting closer to the edge of the sofa.

“I want to serve for my county. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do. It’s not like I’ve hid that from anyone.” I say

“No. You’re not.” Dad said before standing up. “I wont allow it.”

“Well that’s too late. I’m 18, well nearly 19, I don’t need your permission to do this anymore. It’s already done. There’s no turning back now.” I say calmly.

That’s when dad walked out of the room and went upstairs. “Mum” I say looking back at her.

“I… I…” she took a deep breath. “I didn’t really know you were thinking of doing this? I know you always wanted to help people but I thought maybe as a policewoman or doctor or something not a marine.”

“I’m not sorry, this is something I just have to do.” I say.

I wasn’t drafted right away about 6months later I was called and I needed to be at Norfolk Naval station, VA on the 24th July at 0800 hours. The mission I was going on didn’t have a end date yet, so I hd no idea how long I was going to be gone for. I said goodbye to my family and headed out to help my fellow citizens.

~ Flashback Over ~

I was currently docking in Norfolk after being away or nearly 2 years. I’m now 21 years old. I had been working aside other people like me. We had finally finished our mission we were given. While I was away I had made some real fiends or family as that matter who I would protect with all my life. While I’ve been away I stayed in contact with my family and getting updates about everyone. My siblings are older and more wiser. I did some recon with my fathers security guard Cliff. I sent him a little later while I was away saying I was coming home and needed his help to surprise my family. Turns out the weekend I was coming home was a convention weekend and my whole family was going to be there. He helped me get home back to Texas. I got everything I needed before heading out to see my family and I couldn’t knock the smile off my face.

Since it was currently convention season for Supernatural. Jared, Jensen, Misha, basically everyone who was one the show was at this one place, even their families. When I reached the hotel where the convention was being set I message Cliff and he came a met me and showed me where my room was, he told me that my dad and Jensen’s panel was starting in 5 minutes and it would be on for an hour. So I quickly took a shower, making sure to not get my hair wet and got dressed in my Navy uniform and messaged Cliff that I was on my way down. At this moment in time Jared and Jensen were about 20 minutes into doing the panel. I made my way backstage but was hiding behind a curtain nobody knew I was there. I could see my mum and siblings and even Danneel and the little ackles, who aren’t little either. They all really grew other the past 2 years. I stayed standing listening to the people I loved talk about random things which was nice to hear other than hearing talks about attacks it was nice to hear my dad unfunny jokes again in person. That’s when the next person came to a mic to ask a question and ask “What do you think your children would say was the best thing you’ve done as a parent was?” Nobody knew that their children was there so Tom, Shep, Odette, JJ, Arrow and Zep all walked onto the stage while the crowed screamed. The ackles answered first. Then Tom, Shep and O did right before she finished I slowly made my way onto the stage from the side. The crowd grew louder making everyone on stage look back but nobody was there since I was to the side. I then spoke into the mic I was given.

“I would say the best thing my parents have one for me was to let me be who I am and to not be afraid to go after something that means something to me. They showed me that the power os love and kindness really is the key to living a good life” I say while walking slowly to my father who had tears forming in his eyes. That’s when mum ran onto the stage and my whole family circled my into a hug and didn’t let go for a good few minutes. I was finally home with my family and I couldn’t ask for anything better than this moment right here.

After awhile we all went back behind the stage and waited for the panel to be over. I stayed sitting with my mum holding her hand just catching up and laughing along with my siblings and having a nice time with my family. Once the angel finished my dad came rushing down the steps from the stage looking for me. I got up and rushed into his arms and hugged him for dear life. For the rest of that night we stayed together as a family, I went back to my room got changed into some normal clothes and we all went out for dinner and then went back to mum and dad hotel room since they booked out a big room so we could all be there when not sleeping and we spent the night watching movies before all falling asleep on the sofas in the room. I was home and I couldn’t be happier than this moment in time.

It was time to find a new dream to live. I was thinking of still working for the Navy just not a a marine, maybe one of their detectives. Who knows.