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mirkwoodshewolf · 1 year

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Turtle doves; Eddie Munson x reader

*Author’s note*

Okay in light of the fact that Christmas is just one week away (and that I missed both Halloween and thanksgiving fic ideas I could’ve done), I figured now was the time to do a Christmas theme fic for this beloved metalhead who stole my heart this year. At first I was gonna do a mistletoe one but I’ve been seeing a lot of them lately but after re-watching Home alone 2 and I saw the turtledoves I thought BINGO DING DING DING DING!

Not much warning except maybe some swearing, insecure Eddie and TONS AND TONS of fluff!!!

Taglist:

@plethora-of-things

@waddles03

@psychosupernatural

@queen-paladin

@queensdivas

@jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels

@gay-and-ready-to-cry

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Up in Indianapolis, the city was bustling with excitement but also chaos because it was that time of the year again, Christmas time. Hundreds among hundreds of people crammed into the stores to not only get the best deals, but also get the gift before their fellow man can. The airports packed with families waiting for the arrival of extended family or friends.

“Eddie? Oi Eddie!” Dustin snapped Eddie out of his trance. Eddie shook his head and looked down at his favorite (even if he thinks he’s a little shit at times) freshman member of his Hellfire club.

“What?”

“You were miles away. Thinking about (Y/n) again?” Dustin teased. Eddie smacked the boy in the back of his head and said.

“You wish Henderson.”

“You are like bright red in the face right now.” Laughed Dustin.

“Shut your mouth Dustin. That’s your final warning.” But Dustin wasn’t wrong. He was thinking about said girl, in fact he’s thought about her all year.

Ever since she took that study abroad program for her Animal Biology major in college, she hasn’t had much time to talk with Eddie. Letters were scarce and phone calls were even rarer. And even though he was happy for her going all around the world studying wild animals, he wished that she wouldn’t be so far away from him all the time.

Eddie Munson and (Y/n) (L/n) had been friends since they met in the 6th grade when Eddie had his bike stolen by some asshole 8th grade jocks and (Y/n) threw sticks at them to get them to retreat. There she shared his first animal facts that chimps in the wild would throw sticks and stones at pythons to dive them away from their territory.

(Y/n) had always loved reading and learning about animals and she dreamed of one day venturing out into the world to study them and see how they behave up close. That’s why Eddie always called her his venturous She-elf.

When she got to graduate in 84 and he didn’t, it didn’t deter their friendship. Every weekend and holiday she visited him and would tell him all about how college has been treating her and what she’s learned that she hadn’t before. But Eddie had been harboring a secret that not even she knew of.

Since the start of their high school years, Eddie had fallen in love with his adventurous Elf. Not only for her looks but for her passion for what she wanted in life. Like him, she had a goal and she was reaching it, achieving it, and trying to own it. She was indeed a darer but he feared that if he ever told her how he truly felt, he’d be holding her back.

Hell he couldn’t even graduate from High school, twice! What could he ever offer her?

“Eddie?” Dustin said trying to get his attention. “You okay?”

“I’m fine. Just wondering what stories she has for us this year.”

“Oh yeah. I hope she brought home some cool souvenirs. Like this one time when her and her family went vacationing in Nepal and she got me this really cool face mask of an elephant. I still wear it to scare Lucas every now and then.”

“Thanks for the leverage Henderson to use against him next time he ditches us for his laundry baskets game.”

“You know I still can’t believe that you and (Y/n) know each other.”

“We do have lives outside of you Henderson, the world doesn’t always revolve around you yah know.” Soon their eyes caught sight of her plane landing and Eddie’s heart started to beat a little faster than normal. As quietly as he could, he took a deep breath before exhaling and they waited a few minutes as the passengers all began to depart the terminal gate.

Soon they spotted a young woman with (h/c) hair and prescription glasses on the bridge of her nose. She rolled out with her carryon to see two boys holding up a sign that was decorated and spelled out: WELCOME HOME LADY TAURIEL, her D&D’s character name. She smiled and came up to them and first embraced Eddie.

“Well this is a surprise, I thought I’d have to get a cab to your trailer.”

“What and leave you in this craziness by yourself? Absolutely not.” Eddie said as they parted but they both kept their arms around each other just a little bit longer. Dustin began to notice not only the lingering embrace they were doing, but also the look in both their eyes as they looked at each other.

“So what am I (Y/n)? Chopped liver?” asked Dustin. The two young adults separated from each other and (Y/n) shook her head.

“You would think all the times I spent babysitting you would mellow you out Henderson, but you’ve gotten an even bigger ego than when I left.” She said.

“It’s his tone right?” Eddie asked her. Dustin grumbled as he crossed his arms. (Y/n) shook her head laughing as she walked over to Dustin and embraced him before giving him a kiss on the cheek.

“Eww! You know I hate it when you do that!”

“Whatever you little shit. Now let’s get the rest of my bags and back home. Being on a plane for over 24hrs is not as enjoyable as it sounds.”

“Right this way then, Lady Tauriel.” Eddie said with a gracious bow. They went over to the baggage claim, gathered up all her bags and then headed on out to Eddie’s van to drive back to Hawkins.

It was a bit of a drive thanks to the traffic and the snow starting to fall, but they managed to reach Hawkins safe and sound. After dropping Dustin back at his place, Eddie and (Y/n) finally arrived at his place.

“You sure it’s okay for me to stay here? Mrs. Henderson offered me one of the spare rooms over at their place.”

“As sweet as the old lady is, how could I live with myself knowing you’d be stuck with Henderson 24/7. Plus I know you do have something for him that he says he’s been dying to see.”

“True. It’s just….I don’t want to run you out of house and home.”

“You aren’t. Besides Wayne’s been asking about you, I swear he loves you more than he does me.”

“Shut up Munson, Wayne loves you with all his heart.”

“Yeah I know. Well let’s get inside before the snow really starts piling up. Weather man’s been saying it’ll be the heaviest snowfall in 10 years.”

“Even though I’ve grown up with Indiana weather, it’s nothing compared to Nepal, or Tibet, or even Antarctica ugh. Never will I go down there again, even if I wanna see the cute penguins. I’ll take the ones in South Africa.”

“There aren’t any penguins in Africa!” Eddie objected as he grabbed one of her suitcases as they both exited the car.

“There are too and I’ve got the pictures to prove it.”

“You do not.”

“I do so!” the two of them continued their playful banter as they unloaded the van and placed all her things in Eddie’s room. “I’ve noticed you guys decided to do some indoor decorating this year.”

“Yeah. Wayne’s come into some really good money lately, and with some of the paid gigs the band and I have done, we decided why the hell not?”

“So it would seem my own personal Grinch finally found the Christmas spirit again ehh?” she teased as she poked his belly making him curl inward.

“I never lost it!”

“Mm-hmm.” She hummed skeptically.

“That’s it! C’mere!” he lunged at her, the two of them falling onto his bed and he proceeded to tickle her sides making her thrash around in laughter. “You know I think I finally know where Henderson got his sass from. After all, you’ve known him longer than either Harrington or me. We have you to blame for his behavior.”

“Nohohoht mehehehe!”

“Yes you! Now admit it or the tickling continues.”

“I don’t…..stohahap! Please!”

“Nope. The begging and puppy dog eyes won’t work on me this time.” As (Y/n) continued laughing, a voice soon called out.

“Eddie? You better not be killing someone in there boy.” Eddie was forced to stop as his uncle had arrived home earlier than normal. He got off of (Y/n) and said in a low, menacing yet playful tone,

“Saved by the old man. But don’t think you’re getting out of this just yet missy.” (Y/n) shoved him back to the bed and Eddie let her do it as she went out and said.

“Sorry Wayne. But if I had to be killed, death by tickles wouldn’t be too bad of a way to go.”

“Well as I live and breathe. Ms. (Y/n) (l/n) back from her time around the world.” (Y/n) smiled and walked over and asked Wayne.

“Permission to hug?”

“Permission granted ma’am.” The two of them embraced each other and after awhile he let her go. “Bout time you got here, Eddie wouldn’t shut up about how many days left till you arrived.”

“Wayne!” Eddie groaned from his bedroom door. “Why are you home so early? Usually you don’t get off this early unless it’s a holiday and Christmas eve is 2 days away.”

“The weather son. Boss decided it’d be best for us to all head home so that we wouldn’t get snowed in.”

“Well that was nice of him. Oh speaking of which, I have a surprise for you Wayne.” (Y/n) said as she raced back into the bedroom and grabbed both her scrapbook and a neatly wrapped present. “I was almost worried I wouldn’t be able to give this to you, or see your reaction when you’d open it.”

“Ain’t we supposed to open presents on Christmas though?” he asked her.

“Normally yes but this really isn’t a Christmas present. I saw it when I was in Tanzania and I thought one person had to have it.” Wayne took the box and unwrapped it before opening it up to reveal a beautifully hand-crafted and painted bowl.

The background was painted like the African sunrise with Mt. Kilimanjaro in the background and up front and center was a large African rhino (his favorite animal).

“I know it’s not a mug but it was the closest thing I could find to a cup.”

“Don’t go saying things like that, I love it. Thank you sweetie belle.” He wrapped an arm around her bringing her in for a one armed hug.

“Don’t I get a present too (Y/n)?” asked Eddie.

“Yes but you have to wait until the Christmas eve party at Steve’s. It is still happening there, right?”

“Yeah. You know Harrington.”

“Now go easy on that boy Eddie, sure he may have started off as a jerk to yah but you two really have become good friends thanks to that kid of yours.” Eddie waved it off before going to the kitchen to find himself something to eat. “So darling, what do you think of the decorations we got up?”

“I love it. I especially like the light up penguins over there by the tree.” She said pointing to the small decorated Christmas tree and by the nightstand stood a lit up penguin lamp.

“Eddie said you’d like it. In fact this was all his idea to begin with that we’d decorate the place special for you.”

“Oi Wayne! Since you’re here how’s about you cook dinner for once instead of having to do fend for yourself night!?” Eddie shouted trying to change the topic. Wayne rolled his eyes getting the hint of what his nephew’s behavior meant while (Y/n) was left perplexed.

Did—did Eddie feel the same way as she did? Did she hear that right? Or is this just Eddie being Eddie? One thing’s for sure, she was gonna try and tough it out and admit her feelings for her best friend at the Christmas eve party and hope she doesn’t humiliate herself doing it.

Two days later and after clearing up the roads after the snow storm they had when she first arrived, the gang was all gathered at Steve’s place for the party. Now this party was extra special to the group because throughout the entire party, each guest would present a tradition that was done with their families on Christmas day.

As per Robin’s family tradition, everyone had to come in wearing the ugliest Christmas sweater they could find. And the first activity was Christmas musical chairs as per Wheeler tradition. Mike decided to be the DJ and as Chuck Berry’s ‘Run Rudolph Run’ played over the speakers the rest of the gang began to circle around the chairs, and the first one to be out was Steve.

“Wait hold on that’s not fair! Munson kept stopping!”

“Just take the loss with pride Harrington.” Eddie told him. Steve rolled his eyes but took one of the chairs after everyone stood back up and the game resumed. One by one the rest soon began to fall until the final three came down to Dustin, Eddie and (Y/n).

“Remember, third place gets this giant Hershey’s bar.” Nancy said holding out the fairly large chocolate bar. A decent prize but it’s nothing compared to the giant family/party size M&M bag that was up for first prize.

The music started up and all three of the remaining players began to fake the other out by either pausing in front of the chairs before moving again, or trying to sit in the chairs while the music was still playing before moving on again. The song stopped and Eddie and (Y/n) ended up being the final two.

“Aww nice try Dustin but you still get the chocolate bar.” Nancy said.

“That’s fine.” Dustin said taking (Y/n)’s chair away and as Eddie and (Y/n) stood over the final chair, they stared each other down.

“That bag of M&M’s is mine Munson.” Boasted (Y/n).

“Don’t make me laugh (L/n). You know I kill for m&m’s. The only thing you’ll be getting is the three musketeers packet.”

“Alright enough flirting you two, get to walking!” Mike groaned as he started the music back up and the two friends began to battle it out for the chair. Once again the pair would stop in front of the chair trying to delay the other before racing around it, taunting the other to distract them from the song, until finally the song stopped and after a squabble that lasted for what felt like a minute, (Y/n) won the pot!

“Yes! Yes! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! Ha! In your face Munson I won the pot haha!” (Y/n) rejoiced as she claimed her prize, a full year supply of M&M’s while Eddie was given the three musketeers bag. Even with his wounded pride, he accepted the prize and was happy that his girl got the big prize.

The traditions continued with watching ‘A Charlie Brown Christmas’ and ‘How the Grinch stole Christmas’ (Sinclair tradition), playing a few Christmas songs (the Munson tradition), and acting out a chapter or two from ‘A Christmas Carol’ (a Henderson tradition). Next up was (Y/n)’s family tradition, ‘Santa Exchange’ as the gift opening was about to happen.

“Okay let’s see. This here is for Robin.” She said holding up a beautifully wrapped gold and red box with a red bow. Robin took her present as (Y/n) grabbed the next one when another hand reached up and grabbed a snowman packaged present bag. She looked up to see Eddie and he said,

“Figure Santa needs a little helper?”

“Santa appreciates it, thank you.” Soon the two of them worked together passing out all the presents to everyone until they were all set up in their own areas throughout the living room. “Okay so every year my family mixes up the order in how we each open up our presents so this year I say we go from oldest to youngest. Sound good with everyone?”

“Yep. Yeah.” Everyone answered.

“Alright, but before we start that, I want everyone to take my gift to you and open it. It’s all the same thing that I had done when I was in Japan.” Everyone went through their gifts until they found (Y/n)’s gifts and they all began opening them.

When everyone opened their gifts, it was revealed to be a traditional, authentic Japanese painting of her friends. Not only were they in the picture, but next to them was an animal she felt like was their spirit animal.

Nancy had an crane on her picture, Steve had a dog specifically the Japanese breed Akita, Dustin had a tiger, Robin had a white cat, Lucas had a phoenix, Mike was a koi fish, and Eddie had the traditional Japanese dragon.

“I found a traditional Japanese artist and in the span of the 4 months I was there with my team filming the Japanese Alps, I asked him to do this for you guys.”

“Wow (Y/n) this is—incredible.” Robin said admiring her painting.

“Easy for you to say, I’ll bet none of you are a fish.” Mike whined to which Nancy hit her brother in the arm making him exclaim in pain.

“It’s wonderful (Y/n), thank you.” Everyone else soon thanked her for her gift and she smiled as she sat back down at her area next to Eddie.

“Now that that’s out of the way, Eddie why don’t you start us off?”

“Yes!” Eddie softly cheered as he grabbed the first gift he spotted which was from Dustin. He opened it to reveal the new Led Zeppelin cassette. “Ha-ha! I knew you’d come through for me Henderson!”

“You’ve only been talking about it since Halloween. But I knew you’d like it, Merry Christmas Eddie.” Eddie continued to open up his gifts and he got some more cassette tapes, some new pins for his jacket, a new red flannel, and the new D&D manual book that had recently came out.

Up next was (Y/n). She opened the first gift that was from Steve and Robin. She unwrapped the paper before looking at the box to reveal what exactly it was before opening it.

“Oh my god, you guys.” It was the new Panasonic VHS camcorder.

“We figure you might wanna record some of your trips instead of just taking pictures. 3 hours of film this thing can do.” Steve said.

“This must’ve costed you guys a fortune. And I knew Keith don’t pay you much.”

“Worth every penny. Besides I expect some videos of tigers with that camera next time you go to India.” Robin said pointing at her.

“Alright, it’s a deal. Thanks you guys.” Seeing that camcorder made Eddie sick to his stomach. He wasn’t rich nor did he have enough money to buy her expensive gifts, all he had was his small little surprise that he had made for her. But he began to second guess himself, would she even like it? His stomach continued to turn in knots as she grabbed the next gift which was a new scrapbook from Nancy.

“Figured your old one was getting full so I figured it’s time for a new one. There’s also some little stencils in there so you can decorate it as you wish.” She told her.

“Aww I love it, thanks Nancy. Okay whose next?” she hovered her hand around the remaining gifts until she picked up Dustin’s. “Henderson’s next.” She unstapled the bag and pulled out the green paper stuffed inside and pulled out a journal that read across the cover (Y/N)’s ENCYCLOPEDIA.

“My encyclopedia?” she asked him.

“Thought it would be cool to get real animal biology from a real animal biologist. Someone who actually knows the facts and doesn’t keep editing it, I swear you’re smarter than any science book that talks about animals and how they behave and operate.”

“Is this some excuse to help you with future science homework?” she teased.

“What? No, no! No way! I just wish for you to write down what all you know and what you didn’t know before about all the animals you help document and study.”

“Well that’s sweet of you Dustin, thank you. Okay Michael, you’re up next.”

“Why must you insist on calling me that?”

“Cause I know it embarrasses you. And as your former babysitter it’s my job to embarrass you.” She opened up his gift and it was a small animal calendar. “Alright! Now I’ll be able to see what day it is. I swear those guys don’t carry calendars with them like at all. They tally the days like cavemen in their journals. Thanks Mike, really I appreciate it.”

She then went for Lucas’ present and he got her a mini-figurine that his sister made of her character Lady Tauriel.

“Now Erica would claim she made it all herself but I was the one that bought the figurine in the first place and I told her your description of her. She painted it and that’s all.”

“It’s a team Sinclair effort and I love it. Tell your sister when you see her thank you too.” She placed her D&D character back in the container before saying. “And last but not least, Eddie—” but as she reached out for it, Eddie snatched his gift back and pocketed into his leather jacket.

“Dude what the hell? You can’t just take back your gift.” Steve said.

“Shut up Harrington!”

“Eddie what’s wrong? I want to see what you got me.” She asked him.

“No you don’t. it’s not even ready.”

“Why would you give her an incomplete gift?” Mike asked.

“Hey Mike cool it, I’m sure Eddie has a good reason. Final exams were a bitch this year so I can see why he wouldn’t have time to finish his gift.” Dustin said trying to get Mike off Eddie’s back.

“It’s nothing like that Henderson, and I can defend myself thank you very much!” but his tone was harsh.

“Geez Eddie no need to snap. I know Dustin can be a bit much but there’s no need to go that far.” Said Robin.

“Will you guys just leave me alone alright!? God this is why I hate Christmas! Everyone making a deal about presents that just end up in the trash a couple weeks if not the day after Christmas!” he soon stormed out of the room and the house echoed a loud slam from the front door.

“I’ll go talk to him.” (Y/n) said as she got up and followed after him. After putting on her coat, boots and gloves, she followed Eddie who was leaning against his van smoking with a furrowed brow. “You’ll catch your death of cold if you stay out here like that.”

“I’m fine. Never bothered me anyway.”

“You may have everyone convinced that you’re this stone, cold metalhead but not to me. Sure you’re a metalhead but you’re not stone cold.”

“Well you wouldn’t know considering you haven’t even been here for over a year and a half!” he snapped. It shocked (Y/n) to hear Eddie snap at her like that but as soon as he looked at her shocked expression, he sighed heavily and stomped out his cigarette. “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have shouted.”

“I know.” She walked up to him and took his hand between hers, not only in comfort but to warm them up. “You wanna tell me what’s really going on in that squirrel brain of yours?”

“I don’t have a squirrel brain.”

“Yes you do. You always have a million things going through your head, and its twice as intense when you’re stressed or upset about something. So c’mon tell me. We’ve always been able to tell each other everything.” Eddie looked into her soft, gentle (e/c) and he felt his heart melt but also grow heavy into his stomach.

“Everyone else got you such amazing gifts. Gifts that’ll either help your future career or that you can personalize. Hell the Sinclair’s made your D&D character come to life, and all I got you was……this.” He took out his gift which was just a plain old small white box with a golden ribbon tied to it.

He couldn’t even look her in the eyes as he held it out to her. Once he felt her take it from his hand, he crossed his arms over his chest as his breathing grew sharper and heavier and she could see just how fast it was from the cold breath that escaped his lips and danced into the air.

She looked down at the plain white box and untied the ribbon before opening it to reveal inside two chain necklaces and attached to them were what appeared to be hand-carved wooden turtle doves. Or that’s what they seemed to be, it was a bit mish-mashed but even with the faults in the sculpting, she knew it must’ve taken Eddie a long time to do these twice.

“They’re supposed to be turtle doves. I know they look shitty, the woodshop instructor couldn’t teach me for shit and the chain is nothing special. Just from some old chain necklaces Wayne doesn’t wear anymore so I got rid of what was on those and he helped me attach the birds to the chain.”

Tears formed in her eyes as she pulled the necklaces out of the box and held them in her palm. She looked up at Eddie and immediately embraced him tightly, burying her face into his shoulder blades.

“What?”

“Eddie,” she released him so she could come around and cup his face which was already turning red from the cold, and even his nose was starting to go a bit red. “This, this is the sweetest, most thoughtful gift anyone has ever given me.”

“Really?” he asked insecurely.

“Really, really. And knowing that you did your best, I don’t care if the turtledoves look perfectly hand sculpted or like a woodchipper went to town on them.” They both softly laughed. “But there is something that is wrong with this gift.” At hearing that statement, Eddie’s brief moment of happiness once again turned back to fear. He felt her take his left hand and she placed one of the turtle dove necklaces into his palm before closing it up. “You need to keep one, so that way we each have one, and that we’ll always come back to each other.”

“Each other?” he asked her. She nodded as she slowly got closer to him whispering.

“Together forever, meleth nin.” She then took her chance and kissed her best friend/secret crush. When she felt him tense, she feared that maybe the kiss was too much and began to pull away but it wasn’t until she felt Eddie’s arms wrap around her waist pulling her close and even lifting her up.

She was stunned but wrapped her arms tighter around Eddie’s shoulders as their kiss slowly deepened until he set her down and they separated for air.

“My Christmas wish came true this year.” She whispered lovingly.

“Agreed. I’ve only dreamed of this a thousand times since middle school. Merry Christmas Lady Tauriel.”

“Merry Christmas Lord Beren.” They smiled at each other lovingly before they hugged each other so tightly it was like their bones would pop, before they looked at each other with their noses brushing against each other’s and their lips met in another sweet kiss.

“ABOUT DAMN TIME!! I’VE BEEN SEEING YOU MAKE GOO-GOO EYES AT EACH OTHER SINCE SHE GOT HERE!!” Dustin’s voice exclaimed in the night air. Eddie rolled his eyes before bending down and grabbed a big chunk of snow and quickly raced towards Dustin.

He let out a scream before racing back inside with Eddie at his heels holding the snow patch in his hands.

“No! NO don’t you dare stuff that down my back!”

“Get over here Henderson!”

“HEY NO SNOW TRAILS IN MY HOUSE GUYS!!” (Y/n) shook her head as she went back inside and closed the door as the chaos continued with Dustin exclaiming and trying to get the snow out of his back, Steve trying to mop up the wet patch of water from said snow that had been dropped on his good carpet, and Eddie and (Y/n) sitting close to each other exchanging kisses every now and again.

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madmadder · 3 months

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Another unwanted presentation for you to read (or not)

TRIGGER WARNING: I mean it's just detail but I do mention non con briefly and just a lot of gay booty

Why hello Tumblr.

Since my brain didn't let me open this app a lot recently for??? Some reason?? I'm gonna take my revenge and do a full presentation about a song I associate with paras. Because that's fun.

Now this isn't the first para song I wrote down, FAR FROM IT, but I really love it okay leave me alone 🥹

It's called ''Middle of a Breakup'' by Panic! At The Disco, tis about a breakup (would you have guessed??) and people having a bunch of sex which is always fun to hear about. I associate it with two of my paras, Stryne and Octavius, who got married recently (*screeches*). Their relationship is very complicated but not toxic and definitely NOT over. The song reminds me of them not because they're breaking up (dear Lord never!! My babies!!) but because they have this unbelievable passion that just. Grrrr

Stryne

Stryne is the prince of a kingdom named Trys'han. He's an elf and rough shit happened to him and my point was he's SUPER badass. Very stoic and calm in most situations even with extreme danger. He has a very strong Laurent of Vere energy (if you read Captive Prince and you should btw), but I made him before I knew about the book which makes me a genius and C.S. Pacat's soulmate. What? It does

Stryne is known to be one of the most beautiful people ever which puts him in a lot of trouble sometimes cause some people just won't respect consent.

Octavius

Octavius is human and also insane. Like super weird. He's the most polite (and cynical) young king you'll ever meet but also he likes to break bones. Yknow. He rules a kingdom named Tarnstrang.

He actually perfectly ignored Stryne's consent when Stryne was caught as a war prisoner but what's weird is that they ended up in this weird ''enemies with benefits'' thing and they actually fell madly in love?? Idk don't ask me I thought it was weird too but now they're in a somehow healthy relationship. Please keep all questions til the end of the presentation.

The song

Now this song is a frickin banger. I absolutely love it. It has a very vintage vibe which always SLAMS

There's such a strong ''I hate you but I want your titties'' energy that you cannot hate. And the LYRICS!!

''You and me don't deserve each other'': true, Octavius is a huge asshole who doesn't deserve Stryne in the first place and yknow Stryne deserves someone better so that works both ways, BUT!! He makes Octavius be and WANT to be better so Octavius feels like Stryne doesn't deserve him or he doesn't deserve to be happy and married blah blah anyway I'm smart

I also particularly love the lyric that says ''feels like we just met''. Like. Okay. How are you so in love with someone that you feel like you're rediscovering them, I mean that is just AWESOME (sorry aro guys I have much love for you too I swear)

Okay, another one: ''I hate those words like destiny, forever and all time''. Sure they're a bit cheesy together (I mean cmon it's sweet) but they've also been through so much they don't believe in destiny and crap BUT they have found each other and that's awesome. They don't feel like they've been Miraculously Chosen, they simply fell in love and made it work. Awesome. (I'm very pragmatic if you couldn't tell 😂)

Plus: Stryne is an elf and he has been raised to speak VERY correctly so he's almost Shakespearean when he talks and it's very awesome because it clashes with this thought he has: no, there's no destiny, just facts. (Plus it allows his husband to make fun of him)

This is them btw

Anyway. That's it. I just needed to share because my brain is going to explode otherwise. I'm now crawling back to my cave ❤️

#maladaptive daydreaming #maladaptive daydreamer #paras #para: stryne #para: octavius #madd

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ashwhowrites · 1 year

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SB is doing homework and I miss them so let's write a cringy post about them!

To @simping-over-boys-with-trauma

Hehe okay! I'm not sure exactly when SB and I first started talking but either way I feel like it's been years. I feel like I've been talking to them like every day of my life. I remember that they always interacted with my blog when I was tiny. It was like having that #1 cheerleader in your corner. I would post a fic and just wait and wait until I got their notification. That's when their name started to get me all giddy.

Then I saw them for the first time!! They sent me 2 photos of them with their elf ears because they were going to their DND campaign. I giggled for like three minutes honestly. They even said "here you go mommy" or some message like that. They had a very edgy vibe with their jewelry. It looked like they had some make up on. Maybe a pink eyeshadow underneath their eyes?

I remember never wanting to spank them because they were just so special and I adored them. Then once I started posting videos of smacking dough around, and they kept saying they wanted to be smacked like that. I kept saying no until they said they'd do their makeup for me just to let me ruin it for them.

Then I remember getting a message in my inbox about "hypothetically how would you feel controlling someones toy?" And that is what started it all. I cannot even tell you how I squeallleeeeeeddd when they confessed it was them asking. I received a link to their toy and edged them for two hours, the very first time.

Then we just kept doing it again and again. Now I'm constantly asking to play with them. Gonna get incredibly personal right here - my favorite part of playing with them is when I get to hear them cum. I'm an audio person. I love hearing moans, whimpers, screams and everything. So when I got to hear them whimper "mommy" "please" "wanna cum" and just their whimpers in general? Fuckkkkkkk I was just so in awe.

One thing I really love is that I know them so much. I know which nicknames are gonna make them melt. I love that I can hear their whimpers. I can imagine how they look when they cum. I can imagine their reactions to my texts. I just love that I know those little details.

For the sweet stuff!!

Them as a person, is just incredible. I love their humor, it's very similar to mine. We both tell the same jokes and laugh at the same stuff. Every day we find something new that connects us. We are always on the same brain waves. We think the same things and text the same messages at the same time.

Hard conversations? Never too hard. They are so understanding and let me ramble and ramble. One thing I appreciate is they never want me to apologize over and over, we like to do this who can be sorry more? And I like that they want me to learn to apologize once and feel fine after. They are helping me learn new things.

They are just an amazing person and they haven't been treated like that in the past. They've had people not respect who they want to be and I hate that. I just want to show them what they deserve. What they are WORTH. I'm a little cheerleader for them, always cheering them on. Their ex's were assholes and I wanna kick their asses. Then fuck my baby afterwards<3 they can easily protect themselves but I'd fight for them any day. My tiny ass will stand my ground 🫡 my baby and I want to make my baby happy and keep them safe. Cuddle them on their hard days and listen to them talk for hours

Do I have a crush? Definitely

Am I supposed to? Hehe nope

Do I care? Definitely not

I also wanna be their sugar momma and they won't let me 😠

Happy Valentine's day SB <3

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why-what-no · 2 years

Text

Ok, So… Y’all are getting (some of) my thoughts on the Rings of Power content we’ve gotten. (Because I am a hardcore Tolkien fan, and am very excited). You have any (polite) disagreements or just want to get excited about the show with me, just DM me. I love conversations.

Pros:

- Was that a scene with the Feanorians?!?! Do I get to see my favourite Tolkien character on screen ???? (It’s Maedhros, yes i know he’s problematic)

- Beautiful cinematography and music, I’m obsessed

- Watching assholes get triggered over there being diversity in the show is so fking funny. Their anger only makes me stronger.

- Celebrimbor being a main character!!!! Celebrimbor being a main character!!!!

- Very Attractive People, and I’m a little excited for the romance subplot they’re planning (im a romantic, don’t judge me)

- Harad Content! Harad Content! Harad Content! Please tell me more people are as excited to see Harad as I am. I love seeing different fantasy cultures and ways of life between different lands in shows.

Don’t know enough to have any more opinions.

Cons/Complaints:

- Bigots and Purists can F off. I’m tired of your dog whistling and superiority complexes. Let people be excited, don’t ruin this.

- Bigger beard for the dwarf princess, as well as longer hair for the elves. Amazon could have given their OC elf the most stunning braids but they were cowards. (Although, I’m kinda into Elrond’s look? Don’t hate me?)

- Kinda wish Celebrimbor looked more elf-like and not just a older dude with pointy ears? He’s one of my fav Tolkien characters so I’m gonna give him a chance tho.

- The actor who plays Gil Galad is married to Kaya Scodelario who is the love of my life and so I’m very jealous of him for being married to her and for being in this show. (I have high hopes for his role tho, so I’ll give him a pass)

That’s it for serious cons, since I haven’t watched the show yet and don’t wanna speculate on stuff I’m not informed about (unlike an irritating amount of “fans”)

Neutrals:

- Don’t know if that pale character is really Sauron. If yes, cool, hope they do well. If not, I’d be really interested to see what the show does with the character. Since I assume they’ll be a dark Sauron cultist or something. And I don’t mind the design actually. I think they looks cool, although if they are Sauron, if that’s his “fair” form, it could be a lot less sketchy.

- Interested about how they’re gonna go with Galadriel. Not super picky about it tho.

- Really hoping the asshole Tolkien fans don’t review bomb this show, because if it gets cancelled before all 5 seasons are aired Imma be heartbroken.

Again, I need someone to talk to about all this (none of my IRL friends are Tolkien fans). Although keep in mind that this is a side blog so I can’t respond to comments on this post so DM me.

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darlingwhump · 2 years

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Stem the Tide ✧ 1: Sink or Swim

Masterlist ● Prequel Drabble ● Next

This is the first chapter of my first ever whump series! Thank you to @sorry-not-sorry-whump and @alastairs-hell for beta reading chapter this for me!! I really wanted to start off this series on the right foot and y’all were very helpful :) Immediately follows my drabble “The Raid,” which serves as a prequel of sorts. I linked it above in case you want to read it first to gain some extra context. But this chapter still makes sense even if you haven’t read it, so don’t worry!

Word Count: ~2100

CW: long-term captivity, language barrier, just angst for now, mermaid whumpee, lady whumpee, rescue, not rly drowning but I'm gonna put it here just in case

This wouldn’t be the first time Kharis had taken prisoners on a raid. Not that the terrified mermaid in their arms really counted as one. By the looks of it, she had already been a prisoner for some time before they found her chained up in that tiny wooden tub in the Captain’s quarters.

The mermaid has clearly been abused to some degree, her pupils shrinking in fear as an unfamiliar stranger enters her prison. She’s completely out of it, trembling and covered in bruises, her pale blue skin spotted with green and purple fingerprints. Her unbound hands curl around her stomach, and Kharis can make out the faint red tinge of rope burns.

Kharis was expecting to find platinum doubloons, Tolescan jewelry, or even just some extra supplies. But all of their excitement dissipates upon seeing the mermaid’s helpless position.

They have no idea who this mermaid is or why she has been locked away, but some instinct within them wanted to help, to somehow relieve her of that weary, tear-filled expression. Kharis wonders if she’s even had a decent meal lately, or how far away from home she must be. She definitely couldn’t walk (duh, Kharis scoffs to themself), and something about the swelling on her fins tells them that she probably shouldn’t be swimming right now.

So, she’d have to come with them.

See, The Marauders have a policy, quick and effective. Board the ship, get rid of the crew, filch as much loot as possible, and dispose of the evidence. Sometimes they skip to that last part, cheering as the raided ship goes down in flames, singing shanties and toasting with freshly stolen ale. Kharis loved the constant hustle, the joy brought by each sinking vessel, and the resulting weight added to their coffers. It almost kept up with their fast-paced time in the War, before they felt the restlessness of peacetime and plunged headfirst into the dawning age of piracy.

But when Kharis or their crewmates took anyone, it was always a prisoner of battle. Some asshole who refused to step in line or had some kind of price on their head. Never had they encountered someone who was already the prisoner of another crew.

They could only be grateful that they actually took their time to look around, or else the mermaid may have gone down in flames with the ship.

When Kharis asks for her name, she lets out a weak, “Name…name is Nereia.” Her voice is laced with a thick Aquan accent, pausing as she tries to remember what to say. Nereia’s eyes dart towards the lifeless Captain behind them, then back towards the ground, so hesitant to make eye contact.

Kharis looks back towards the pirate he just killed, laying face down with a rapier through his chest. A puddle of blood seeps into the expensive-looking rug; it would have been a good find if it wasn’t stained. Kharis moves to block the mermaid’s view.

“Did…did he hurt you?”

She responds with a tearful nod, and Kharis’s heart shatters. Sure, they were pirates, but there was an unspoken code, implicit rules that every pirate followed out of respect. One of them was to not harm an innocent person, and the half-elf highly doubted that Nereia had done anything wrong. Kharis knew that they couldn’t leave her here.

The mermaid accepted their promise of healing back on their ship with a glazed over nod. And after a brief rendezvous with the rest of their crew on the top deck of the raided ship, Kharis returns to the mermaid. Wordlessly peels the single rusted shackle from her tail, where rows of scales had been rubbed raw from chafing metal, and slowly lifts her out of saltwater turned brown with what looks like mostly blood and dirt.

“I don’t think you’re in any shape to go back into the water right now…is your tail sprained? Or infected?” Not like she would know; that would be a question for a proper doctor. After a moment, the mermaid’s brows furrow, head tilting towards the side. Kharis begins to make his way above deck, the mermaid draped over his arms. “Do you speak Alman?”

“Not much,” she says simply, then seems to think for a moment. “Understand some. Sorry, I talk mostly Aquan.”

Their Captain, known amongst pirates as Three-legged-Sibyl, would be able to help her, then. She was a Hybrid, half mer-half human, so she was the only one of the crew who spoke Aquan. Kharis thinks on how to frame their words. “Alright, tell me if you don’t understand what I say, okay?”

She seems to understand that, at least. A nod, but her eyes are wide with uncertainty.

“I’m gonna get you some help for your tail…” he pauses, reading the mermaid’s expression to see if she’s following, “But we’re going to have to ride across to my ship. I know a person who speaks Aquan too. She can help.”

Her eyes light up and her fin twitches. “Speaks Aquan?”

Kharis realizes the implication; she probably hasn’t been able to speak her language in however long she’s been here. “Yes, she speaks Aquan.”

They make their way up to the top deck, and Nereia immediately hides her face into Kharis’s shoulder. “Too bright?” they ask, and feel the mermaid nod against their neck. They pull her closer, trying to shield her as best as they can from the bright, sunny day. “It’s okay, your eyes will adjust.”

The mermaid seems to be a bit better once they sit down in the lifeboat. She looks longingly at the ocean around them, like a starved prisoner who has finally been given a proper meal. Wordlessly, their crewmates begin to row back towards The Marauder; an uncomfortable silence looming as they refuse to address the elephant in the room. Kharis stays next to the mermaid, to both keep an eye on her and ensure that she stays on the lifeboat.

When they see her longing eyes, Kharis offers, “Go ahead, you can put your fin in the water. If it makes you feel better.” They gesture towards the water. She shifts, holding his arm for balance as her fin touches the surface. Soft waves lap around the boat, and Nereia flaps her fins a few times, splashing salt water onto herself.

The look in her eyes, the immediate relief, makes Kharis smile. They may not speak the mermaid’s language, but at least they did something to make her feel a little bit better.

- 🐚 -

This is Nereia’s first chance at escape in months. And maybe…maybe this time nobody else would be punished for it. The Captain was dead after all…he couldn’t punish her or the person who gestured towards the water, encouraging her to put her tail overboard. But what if these raiders…this new Captain did? What if The Captain survived and came to take her back? Could she bear another however-long in captivity?

She weighs her options. Nereia has no idea how far away from home she is, or if it still exists. The attack had been years ago, and most of her circle went missing afterwards. Even if the kelp forests of her home were still there…she didn’t know which direction, or how far away she had traveled. For all she knew, she could end up stuck near the ports of Tolesca, far from any Aquatic civilization.

But if she stays here, she’s staying with more pirates. More pirates who see her as nothing more than a pretty token to put on display, to hang on the mast like a pretty ornament for all their crew-mates to gawk at. The half-elven raider who unlocked her chain claimed that their Captain spoke Aquan, but could she take the risk? What if their captain is cruel, even crueler than the last one, and this is the last time she’ll ever get to see the ocean? That thought is even more terrifying than getting lost at sea.

So, when the half-elf isn’t looking, she pushes herself over the edge of the boat. And with a splash, she’s home.

Her heart flutters as water envelops her form, tears of joy mixing in with the salty ocean. She breathes clean water through her gills, a shaky sigh of relief forming bubbles above the surface.

Then, she freezes. Literally. Nereia hasn’t swam in years, and her muscle memory has definitely gotten weaker over the years. Her tail cramps up and pain shoots up her side. She pedals her frail arms in an attempt to maintain traction, but it isn’t enough. Her tail moves unnaturally from side to side and she’s not getting anywhere. Who would have thought that a mermaid could forget how to swim?

Nereia is sinking. Which is fine, she guesses, as she inhales deeply through her gills and closes her eyes. At least she’s finally in the ocean. She floats straight down, stiff as a board and unmoving, and revels in the feeling of water against her skin--of being fully submerged underwater. Without chains holding her under the bottom of The Captain’s ship and without the shallowness of the muddy tub.

If she can’t swim, how is she supposed to get back home? Her eyes widen and she begins pedaling once more, but unless her tail starts working again, it’s fruitless. The mermaid’s arms tire once more and she keeps sinking, deeper and deeper.

Nereia hears a splash from above the surface and makes no attempt to swim away. Her escape attempt failed. She can’t move her tail, and the diving person, the same half-elf who gestured for her to put her tail in the water, seems to notice. They swim towards her and gently wrap an arm around her torso. The half-elf begins swimming back up to the surface.

She was going to be in so much trouble.

- 🐚 -

“Are you okay?!” Kharis asks as soon as they resurface, breathing heavily as the mermaid appears unaffected. Their crewmates had stopped rowing the moment the mermaid fell overboard, and began to help the two back onto the boat.

“S-sorry, sorry,” The mermaid mutters Alman apologies as she is guided back to her previous seat. Her tail is resting on the bench in front of her, as far away from the water as possible. “Sorry--”

Why was she apologizing? Kharis shakes their head, “Hey, Nereia, it’s alright. You’re fine, you’re safe. Looks like your tail cramped up, that’s all.”

Kharis knew that the mermaid had been trying to get away, and felt a pang of guilt upon bringing her back to the boat. But her tail had definitely frozen, like she had altogether forgotten how to swim. Was that even possible for mermaids? They thought it was some natural biological ability, like how half-elves are born with darkvision and some gnomes have natural magic. He soothes, “There’s no need to be sorry. You just need a bit of rest and we’ll get you swimming again in no time.”

The mermaid shook her head and raised her arms weakly in defense, “Sorry, should not have tried escape. Please…please don’t hurt.”

Kharis was about to explain that they didn’t get hurt, but the expression on the mermaid’s face made it clear that they had misunderstood. “I promise…I promise I won’t ever hurt you.”

Nereia seems unsure if he’s telling the truth. “You’re free. I swear, as soon as we get you healed up, we can take you home.” Her eyes seem to droop at the thought of home, and Kharis is afraid they’re making it worse. “No more hurt.”

It looks like you’ve already experienced far too much hurt, they wanted to say, but it would likely come off the wrong way, especially from a stranger. Instead, they sit there in silence as Nereia calms down, her arms wrapped around her torso and staring back at the ocean again. This time, at least, she makes no move to jump in.

The mermaid sniffles, not quite trusting yet, but at least she isn’t apologizing anymore. Nereia takes a moment to formulate the right words, “Y-your name, please?”

“You can call me Kharis.”

“Kharis?” she tests the words on her tongue, still avoiding eye contact. Tears well up in her eyes and she quickly rubs them away. “Thank you, Kharis.”

Kharis squeezes her hand gently, a soft nonverbal “you’re welcome” that they hope she can understand. She has a thousand-yard-stare, but they suppose that’s natural in situations like this. For now, they’ll leave her to her thoughts.

For the first time since diving after Nereia, Kharis turns back to their crew-mates. They all greet him with the same bewildered expression.

Do you realize what you have just gotten yourself into?

Let me know if you would like to be added to the taglist!

#whump #whump series #whump writing #mermaid whumpee #lady whumpee #pirate whumper #pirate whump #caretaker #whumpee #stem the tide #nereia oc #kharis oc #darling writes

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fangirleaconmigo · 2 years

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Thanks for your show/book analysis. Just a question? Do you think they portrayed the female characters well in s2? I see that said but personally I disagree. I think all the female characters were simplified and fell into the trope territory in s2 compared to the complex characters in the books (with few exceptions). For instance Tissaia, she was made into a blind by love/manipulated by a man woman, not a strong leader. She made wrong choices in the books too, but she was multilayered. Same with Yen, she's my fave and in s1 her past was the best part but in s2 they also simplified her arc. No progress, nothing. Yes, she had the loose of power, wanted power, realizing power is not everything but didn't she realized that in s1? Wasn't her story a bit of a Hollywood cliche compared to the books which her character was very original? Philippa was following orders by Dijkstra? Why? So she can have the enpowered arc later? Another tired trope which I hate. Why can't we have women in power? And so on.

Hi Nonny!

So, the female characters in S2. I'll break down my thoughts in a list form.

Yennefer. So, I will not deny that it is very tropey to have the powerful female lose her powers. Having someone lose their powers is a popular trope, because when people are very powerful, it makes it more difficult to write obstacles. And it seems especially popular to do this to women. Women's power is always seen as dangerous, uncontrollable, and leading to nothing but evil.

And actually, as I was watching with my older sister, she was like NOOOOOOOOOO I HATE THIS (at first) because she said 'they do these things to take the powerful woman down a peg. They're gonna have her be sexually assaulted or something." And they did have Stregobor violate her mind.

And yet we were both ultimately won over by the 'losing power' story line. The thing about tropes is, even the over used ones can be good if you write it well.

And for me, what the story line did was show that Yen's specialness, her strength, her resilience, all of it resided in HER. Not her power. We saw her again, and again, and again, get out of scrapes, survive, and even save OTHER people's lives, all without her power.

When we first see Yen walking with Fringilla, she just INSTANTLY starts working the angle. Starts poking Fringilla to find out her doubts and vulnerabilities. When she is talking to Filavandrel, she's INSTANTLY just instinctively working him for their advantage.

She is a goddamn survivor and I loved to watch her go.

I love the choice she makes to flee instead of kill Cahir. That plot point is pretty thin and wobbly. Definitely don't shake that tree, it'll fall down. But the choice she makes is very Yen. And that is, if you give me two choices, I'll pick a third one and flip you off on the way out. She does not play the game. She goes outside of the game.

Then she saves Jaskier's life. (I was so fucking glad they kept her burning Rience and saving his life even though she didn't have her powers. I know it isn't as cool for a lot of people as the magical rescue, and I get that, but I was so happy they kept it.) She was resourceful and brave.

She saved Cahir's ass in the alley. (and then when that cute boy elf helps them because of his crush on her, Cahir fucking tells her...you do have use after all. I wanted to kick his shins. She just walloped those guards for you, asshole).

I didn't think it was repetitive to season one, because in season one, I really saw her as searching for who she was. Where she would find meaning. Was it Geralt? (no, he basically told her 'you're a raging ego maniac who would be a terrible mom. also, yes, I hid my wish from you. I understood why she left.) Was it Istredd (no, we knew that wasn't gonna happen. Yen ain't following you around to be a science nerd) and was it a baby? (that didn't work either.) To me, when she stood up at Sodden, she realized who she was meant to be. She was meant to be a hero.

But when we see her in S2, we see that she associated that act of heroism with her magic. But it wasn't her magic! It was her willingness to be there. To take a stand! That was her true power. And I think that's what she learns this season.

Now, all that being said, I absolutely despise what they had her do to Geralt and Ciri with my whole entire heart. They had her betraying them and playing Voleth Meir's game. What? No! Yen is a fucking rebel. She doesn't get pushed into a) and b) choices. Come on now. Even the symbolism and full circle of her bleeding for Ciri could not make up for or undo that for me. But if I start with that, I'll breathe fire and write a novel about it. It hate it. We'll just leave it at that.

Also, yeah, I hated what Stregobor did to her. And though I was happy Tissaia helped her, I wanted her to HURT him way more than throwing him against a wall. But again, to me, the vast majority of that plot was letting her shine as a person, to show how extraordinary and brave and strong she is without her magic. So I was good with that. Just don't get me started on what she did to Ciri.

Tissaia. Ok, so Tissaia is my baby. And I thought Myanna Buring KNOCKED it out of the fucking park. I love that she got to be the face of grief for Yen. I think it's interesting (and though not in book character necessarily) that she basically tortured Cahir. Because watching her grief and having her deliver that line make the hair on my neck stand up.

Fun fact (sorry if you already know) those menacing lines that she delivers to Cahir? Those are actually said by Philippa, to someone else, in the books. Fucking with someone's mind is a whole lot more Philippa than Tissaia. But I have let go of expecting book Tissaia in favor of just being in love with Myanna Buring's performance. Her unhinged grief was such a highlight of this season for me.

I loved that her relationship with Yen is very very intense but still, complicated. Not exactly healthy. I just like watching the dynamic. Again, defo not book Tissaia, but their chemistry is electric for me. I think you can leave behind the book if you create something compelling on it's own. And I think Tissaia is. I think they do something really interesting with her.

Now, the big caveat here is that I agree with you about Vilgefortz, but we'll see how it plays out on Thanned. Tissaia makes the choices she makes in Time of Contempt because she BELIEVES IN THE BROTHERHOOD. She TRUSTS them. She is a true believer. And the fact that this is her undoing is poetic and very powerful to the themes of the witcher.

If they are doing that romance so that her choices are motivated or influenced by romantic feelings for a man, and being gullible about him, oh god, that is WAY WAY WAY less fucking interesting and thematic. It is sooooooo reductive and cringey to me. So, I don't know if that is the way they are headed, but it looks like it. And I will be severely, severely disappointed if that's how it plays out on Thanned.

Fringilla. So again, yes, we have a big trope that could be seen as sexist. I will not deny that. We learn Fringilla's motivation for going to Emhyr. And it is the fact that she was sexually assaulted repeatedly, and he saved her.

Lots and lots and lots of people hate this. Want to explain a woman's choices? Want a shortcut to seeing that she is strong? Need an insta backstory? Rape. Want her to be loyal to a man? Have him save her from rape.

But like all tropes, it isn't bad to write it in and of itself. Many people appreciate characters who have been through abuse and persevere, in whatever way that is. When she was sleeping poorly, I called it instantly. Because I recognized it. So. I think it is completely legitimate to either go oH GOD REALLY? I'M SO TIRED OF THIS? and it's EQUALLY completely legitimate to say, I saw myself in her and I like and deserve to feel seen.

So, I don't know. That is very personal, and I wouldn't tell anyone how to feel about it.

But I was compelled by her challenge managing the city. I was compelled by her relationship with Francesca. Her face when the baby is born warmed my heart. Her conversation with her Uncle, I thought this was all interesting and not stereotypical at all.

There were some things I didn't understand at all. I won't say the plot was airtight. I don't expect prestige television from Netflix at this point. But, I thought they created a compelling, strong, (meaning written strongly) female character.

Francesca. Ok, I'm doing this in descending order of how interesting their character arc is. I thought Francesca was excessively naive. She was a leader, which is great. But for me personally, her arc of losing her baby then killing babies is part of a pretty underwhelming trend lately of 'grieving mother = murderer'.

It was in The Umbrella Academy this season. It was in the Multiverse of Madness in Marvel. I am a mother. I get what they're going for. The love of a mother is so strong and the grief of separation from your child or loss of your child is so unthinkable, people can do unhinged things.

However, it doesn't work for me at all.

The power of a mother's love is the greatest force on earth. (Please, no one tell me there are exceptions and some mothers are abusive and unloving. I'm well aware. I have one of those for a mother. I am speaking in generalities and as my own experience as mother.) So. Mother's love. Strongest force in the universe. Can result in violence from the gentlest people.

BUT

It's like writers forget that a mother's grief is the result of LOVE. IT EXISTS BECAUSE OF LOVE IT IS BIRTHED BY LOVE. And a mother's love turns deadly when it is in DEFENSE OF THE CHILD. It isn't just a short trip to murder-innocent-people-ville in ways that are not gonna help your child in any way.

I am not compelled. It does not compel me. I think it's a really reductive model of motherhood and a low effort character arc.

But I loved the casting, and it wasn't all bad.

Philippa. I'll admit I do not know what the fuck they are doing. Who is that dude? It ain't Djikstra. And we saw her for a flash of a heartbeat. Again, obsessed with the casting. Primo casting. But I guess we'll wait to see if they do better by her next season. Philippa is supposed to be a morally gray, deeply ambitious, gutsy, conniving leader with biting wit and lots of jokes about being lesbian. I hope we still get that.

I just realized I haven't mentioned Triss. I'm afraid Miss Merigold would take me another fifty pages to put my thoughts down so I'll stop here.

But I think the way they wrote the women was good and bad. But it was mostly good. I loved that they gave them a genuine friendship. I get tired of the constant cattiness in the books. Like. I get it. Sorceresses. Politics. But I find it exhausting after awhile. And I find a more complex relationship inclusive of friendship is more interesting.

So. My opinion, the tl:dr is, while the dated or cliche gender tropes were there, they were written well enough that they did the characters justice for the most part.

#asks #the witcher #twn #twn critical #this post is actually mostly positive #but out of an abundance of goddamn caution #because there is a tiny bit of critique #i'm tagging it critical #talking twn

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grigori77 · 2 years

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Critical Role Campaign 3 Episode 34

It's Thursday Night. On a Monday. Again. Gods help us this time, please ...

A Nord VPN sponsorship ad, and Ashley's being a spectacular little shit while making a balloon sword ... wow. She also does a MUCH better job than Sam, surprisingly.

Fuck me I'm SOOOOOO nervous right now.

Matt (grinning evilly): "So, when last we left off --" Travis: "Oh shut up!" Ashley: "Asshole!"

Matt: "Fresh Cut Grass ..." Sam: "But I'm just ... just a little boy!"

Ooooooh! FCG flashback! Oooooooh! Chetney flashback! And some LADIES!!! Oh ... okay, that werewolf thing doesn't make me too comfortable right now ...

Wait, Ashton's a HALF-ELF?!!! Did I miss something in his backstory?

Oh shit! The fucking Briarwoods! NOOOOOOO!!! Fuck! Please tell me Laudna's not full on POSSESSED right now ...

Awwwwww! Imogen's mum! Shit! Otohan! Evil bitch! Stop with the seduction thing! Imogen, listen to your mother! RUUUUUUNNNN!!!!

Yeah! Fuck her up, Imogen!

Whoa that storm REALLY made a fucking mess ... wait ... oh fuck! Laudna's stoll dying?

No, Marisha, not the Ruidus dice! AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! NATURAL 1?!!!

Oh gods ... she's really dead? What?

So FCG really knows they're all dead, then? Gods ... so now Sam has to do crucial game math to help ... this is not good.

Yeah, if Sam holds that action then somebody REALLY dies. I mean SOMEBODY'S gonna die anyway, but ... oh fuck ...

Oof ... sexy Chetney ... not the time, Travis!

"Welcome back, Schrodinger. "

BITE ORYM?!!! Seriously?

Laudna's not there anymore, Imogen. Meanwhile Travis does an Ed Harris-in-The-Abyss.

Oh shit! Treshi! Good point! COCK RING?!!!

Initiative going FAST!!!

Oof ... so Revivify doesn't just work automatically? COME ON!!!

Bring Fearne back, PLEASE!!!

Oh man ... Sam, please roll well ...

10? Is that good or bad?

Choices, choices ... YES!!!! She lives! Thank fuck for that ...

Fearne: "How's everybody doing?" FCG: "BAD!!!" Fearne: "Okay."

Who, seriously? SECONDS?!!!

Ashton's gonna give up a BIG FAVOUR to Jianna ... oof ...

Dash, Chetney! Dash!

Oh gods what can Imogen even do for Laudna? What? SERIOUSLY?!!! IMOGEN NO!!!

Fearne: "What do you mean, Orym's dead?"

DOES SHE have a diamond?

Holy shit, Fearne is PANICKING!!!

Oh gods everybody's in the wrong place and too far apart snd there's no time and I AM FREAKING OUT HERE!!! HELP THEM SOMEBODY!!!

Imogen: "DON'T DRAG HER!!!" Ashton: "I'm not gonna drag her like a fucking ragdoll!"

Wow, Laura's getting SO SNIPPY about this!

Yeah, the whole time Liam is just SITTING HERE and SUFFERING!!! The nightmare of bring a spectator right now.

DAMN IT!!! WHO HAS THE DIAMONDS?!!!

Fearne doesn't know who to choose, this is Sophie's Choice!

The darkest rollies of all time ...

"Who votes for Orym?" Oh my gods ... hysterically desperate laughter ensues.

The god-coin ...

Marisha's hoodie ... SERIOUSLY?!!!

Imogen messages Delilah ... "Get your ass down here and BRING HER BACK!!!"

It's Orym. Oh gods, Laudna ... please help our dead lady get back somehow please ...

Okay Fearne, bring or sweet wee man back. PLEASE.

17 ... oh fuck ... that's ... yes, that's SO GOOD.

Oh fuck ... Orym sees Will. And he wants to stay but he hears Fearne ... gods, this hurts so much ...

I'm trying to type through my tears right now because Matt an Liam ate breaking my heart ... but ORYM'S BACK!!!

Fuck ... they can't do anything to bring Laudna back and MARISHA IS LEAVING THE STUDIO!!!

Treshi is alive, at least. But HE can't do anything. BACK IN THE HOLE, BITCH!!!

Imogen's echoing her thoughts to everybody and it's just "I'M SORRY" over and over again! Jesus Christ ...

Don't put her in the hole with that prick. Just GET OUT OF THERE before those arseholes come out.

Early break and everybody's just SHELL-SHOCKED right now ...

So Fearne's still a klepto, at least she's not COMPLETELY off her game right now.

Oh ... stealth rolls ... argh ...

Back to Imahara Joe's place ...

Nearly suffocated Treshi again. Just in time.

No ... looks like they're safe. Crazy high rolls, guys.

Joe: "What am I in right now?" Deep shit, Joe.

Down in a hole, feeling so small ...

Joe offers his staff hazard pay ... as you should, Joe. As you should.

FCG anxiety eating bolts like popcorn.

Treshi spills the beans ... Ashton punches him. Okay ...

23 on on insight check ... Ashley gets a whisper and Sam forgets who to plug.

FCG tries to intimidate Treshi with his saw, Sam rolls a shit intimidation check and the saw jams ...

Whoa ... Orym got SUPER intimidating there. 23? SERIOUSLY?!!! Wee man is TERRIFYING ...

Another whisper for Laura! Sam loses the page so Travis does the plug instead.

"LAUDNA IS DEAD." For such s sad diary entry that shit was weirdly funny ...

So what exactly ARE these potions? And WHAT'S IN THE BOX?!!!

Laura: "I've just got Laudna's head in my lap." Yeah, Imogen's not gonna be any good to ANYBODY right now.

Oooooooooh ... so that's the same shit that's in Otohan's weird backpack thingy. "Poop soldiers." Oh dear ...

Oh, a short rest ... yeah, they sure need one of THOSE.

Scary smell? Hmmmmm ...

Check the box for traps, Chet. 24. It's trapped. Let's wait until we have more hit points, shall we?

Anything metal will set it off. Chetney: "Good thing I'm a master of WOOD." And how does THAT help right now, Travis? Do tell? Matt is skeptical.

Warn Eshteross. Fix Laudna. Get the hell out of there. Quite the to-do list ...

Morri? Really? Is she an option?

Whoa ... take Laudna to WHITESTONE?!!!

Yes! Keyleth! That's the ticket! Do that!

What's even to discuss? C'mon, Keyleth would totally help, especially for Orym, right?

Whoa ... Imogen telekinetically dead-puppeting Pate is just ... wrong ...

Chetney makes a PERFECT replica of his thieves' tools out of mahogany.

Imogen trying to get all her sorcery points back on a short rest: "Fuck me running! Only on a LONG rest!"

Fearne flicks Chetney's nipple to give him guidance ... he opens the lock without incident.

Residuum? Whoa ...

Laura: "Are you gonna snort it?" Chetney: "I'm just gonna do a number."

Whoa ... Chetney is now high as a kite.

Orym: "This SHOULDN'T BE HERE."

Disarm the box or just take the residuum separately? This stuff is potentially volatile ...

No! DO NOT put it in FCG!!!

Joe covers their arses by building a shitty lead box to order. That's definitely worth 300 gold.

A Potion of Possibility ... oooh, that sounds pretty awesome actually. They have TWO OF THEM!!!

Wood can't hurt Chetney!

What's the password? Chetney: "Uh ... grundle!" Ashton: "That might be it, I have no idea."

Super high roll, the box is badly lo ked so he just carves it open without bothering with the lock ... SIX MORE POTIONS!!! Yeah, that's enough for EVERYBODY!!!

Sam: "Laura's keeping a second inventory list because SHE DOESN'T TRUST Ashley Johnson!" Ashley, talking about Fearne: "I don't want to because I am a scatterbrained person."

Cock-ring of Revivification take 2 ...

Ashton starts turning Laudna into a mummy with bandages to keep her preserved for longer.

Oh, the Shifting Face statue! Hello again!

As he's on watch ... Orym thinking about how what Imogen's going through reminds him of hid own loss ... oh man ...

Oh shit ... who's up there? Okay ... Joe has to bluff his way out of this ... everybody HIDE!!!

Everybody's hiding in the tunnel now ... no. Seriously, no Dancing Lights!

Oh ... okay ... looks like that worked ...

Imogen uses Open Mind to see if there are any thoughts on the other side of the door ... wow, that is a BOSS MOVE, Laura! Success ... nothing there. Phew ...

Chetney opens the door ... and let's go the fart he's been holding onto.

FCG watches Chetney through his whole watch spining his saw while contemplating the fight at the start of the day (weeks back now, it seems) ...

Imogen's FEATS?!!! Sneaky sneaky ...

FCG apologises for the fight by ... SAM GIVING TRAVIS A TOOLBOX FOR CHETNEY'S TOOLS!!!

Fearne has a point, they need to talk about what Imogen did in that battle ...

Yeah, Imogen is dealing with A LOT right now ... whoa, so that was a proper flashback for her? Otohan WAS there?

Whoa ... Ashton saw his PARENTS?!!! So THAT was real too ... the armour he stole back in the museum is a serious clue? Ooooooh ...

Wow, that armour looks pretty sweet ...

Orym recognises the armour ... this is Hishari stuff, apparently. Sounds heavy ...

Ashton's remembering stuff ... Sam sneezes. Ashley (at Sam): "Stop it!" (It's back! XD)

Imogen calls the airship. Oh man ... I love hearing Matt do that accent again, I'd quite forgotten.

Yeah, an Orym hug is JUST what the doctor ordered. Imogen, honey, it's not on you, that shit was just fucked to begin with.

Good point ... what even ARE those marks on Imogen's arms?

That's true, now we KNOW that Imogen is a BADASS. It's a good thing ... hopefully ...

Nearly suffocating Treshi has become Ashton's new favourite game.

A pinch of salt? Oh! Gentle Repose. Cool. Laudna is good for 10 days? Nice ...

Imogen messages Eshteross ... he doesn't know anything that can help Laudna right now. THEN they remember he's in danger, so FCG has to send one too ... "You in danger, girl!" XD

Eshteross prepares to defend himself like a badass. Cue several Schwarzenegger impressions ...

Chetney makes FCG an emotional clock to indicate his mood just in case ... it's deeply weird ...

"Is there one here for eye rolls?" Liam: "The doomsday clock is a concern."

Imogen: "How much money do you have left, Chetney?" Chetney: "Well I can't swim in it anymore."

So Joe wants them gone, and it's understandable, but he is clearly fond of them. It's quite sweet, really.

Ashton asks Joe to look out for some of the other Greymoore kids for him ... ooh, backstory ...

Not the best group stealth check, but ... phew, they made it. Oh, wait ... crawlers ... is this a problem?

Run and grab! Run and grab!

Almost everybody gets good rolls ... Imogen hits the stragglers with a Fly spell. Chetney FLOATS!!! Chetney: "What ... devilry?" Chetney thinks HE'S the one doing it.

YES!!! They're all on board! Phew ...

Ho boy ... good place to end the session ...

"We lost one, guys!" Yeah ... tell me about it, Sam. Please let this be something that can be fixed ...

#critical role #campaign 3 spoilers #crit role campaign 3 #campaign 3 episode 34 #matt mercer #marisha ray #laudna #travis willingham #chetney pock o'pea #laura bailey #imogen temult #liam o'brien #orym of the air ashari #ashley johnson #fearne calloway #taliesin jaffe #ashton greymoore #sam riegel #fresh cut grass

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attzi-gearburst · 2 years

Text

Not Schematics

These particular pages of her notebook have stains from what is either soapy water or wine. Both. As always, these notes are kept in her own shorthand.

-----

Writing this in the bath. Usually get notes done first, but feeling dirtier than usual. Puking guts out will do that.

From the top. Was in the tavern at home today, assembling watch meant to show Mega for catalog. Elf came and sat down without asking. Used to people helping themselves to my company, so. Made him wait while I counted gears, then looked up.

Something was off with the eyes. More so than usual with a blood elf. Armor wasn't great either. Spikes, very red. Even less great was him calling me by name. Told him he got points for his ballsy entrance while I gathered my thoughts.

He was polite up until he made half the patrons get up and march out the building by force when I asked for a proper introduction.

Apparently it's nice to be worshipped. Never been convinced of that, but he sure seems to be. Bad sign, even without the context.

But... not a good idea to upset someone who can puppet other people. Even if it might not work on me, didn't like the idea of drowning under a sea of tall sycophants, either. So, old habits kicked in. Never let someone you don't like see the disdain, you know? Bad for business.

Despite everything else, working for Revilgaz taught me good people skills.

"Neat trick. Can think of several situations where that would have been useful. Ya get more points."

Wonders never cease: flattery works on everyone, even if they know they're talking to a flatterer. (Even though he asked about my old job, still assumed he knew what I used to do. In theory, he'd know how I'd react to this situation, right? But hey. I've got a great smile.)

Who introduces themselves as "The Defiler?" Couldn't help myself. Was pretty sure since I wasn't already dead, death wasn't his goal. So, asked if I should call him "The," or "Mr. Defiler." Then he gave me his real name. (Original name?) Acted like I should know who he was because of course Mega would have said something. Pretended not to know anything, just to see how he reacted to not being talked about.

Used to have people try to tempt me away from Revilgaz for other work before I quit on my own. Got offered everything from money, to drugs, to sex, to 'anything my little heart desired.' But, being offered getting my hearing restored was new.

Honestly? He'd have had better luck if he'd tried the 'fix the memory issues' angle instead. Ear's the least of my worries. Still, asked about it in detail to get a feel for what he could do.

Nothing good, for the record.

Thankfully, I've got practice sitting and smiling while powerful men talk about themselves at length. Was never really an open 'come join me' offer, but still seemed like he was trying to tempt me away from Mega. Maybe he wanted me to bring it up?

Not gonna happen. Met the security team months ago. Better to be at the right hand of the Legion than in their path.

Sure, Mr. Dinthoqaf could make a tiny me out of his own blood to illustrate his points. And then kill her. Sure, he had more sway in my home than I was comfortable with. But... Signed a contract. And Iike my coworkers.

Also... Not a monster.

He got bored eventually. Not sure if that's a reflection on my people skills or his reaction to my sass. Either way, he decided to make a point.

Note to self: tell Mega we're down a warehouse worker. Never interacted with him enough to be able to remember his name. Which made the megalomaniac turning him to a puddle of goo to prove a point even sadder.

Felt sick, but kept my attention on the asshole who did it. Took down a few nonsense notes, made comment about "now that we're getting serious, I'll be a good little messenger."

But all the gold and gears in Azeroth, this man truly seems to be coming after us because Mega said no to him at some point? Who is that petty?

"All this because he hurt your feelings?" I said. Smiling. Next to a puddle of goo that used to be a coworker.

I wasn't really in a spot to listen to the reply. At some point, I heard noises about him hoping we weren't on opposite sides when we saw each other again.

"I ain't in the habit of making enemies. Keep that in mind if you wanna talk again."

Better to keep the channel open, right?

Went home, puked guts out, climbed into the bath. Want to break my three drink rule, but writing this before my stupid brain forgets it. Because there are parts that will fade if I don't do this. No matter how bad it was.

Need to talk to Mega. Need to warn Kappi, Dave, and Zokk to keep an eye out for creepy elves (be less vague). Probably shouldn't say anything to Mister Mae yet; gotta be a better time to unleash him.

Might go get sick again, actually. But hey... My boots survived.

Note to self: ask Zokk for some blood resist enchants for my clothes.

Note to self: work more with the watch. We're going to need some second chances.

#attzi gearburst #not schematics #fbc rp

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imagine-silk · 1 year

Text

On that topic The Warden is ‘100 Bad Days’

Literally all of the origins are like, this thing happened that was so traumatic, now I’m going to join these people who scouted me. Except for Brosca who’s just like, “Fuck all y’all, I’m out!”

And then those people die and you have to stop a blight with a warden barely more experienced than you and fully admits to wanting to follow. Raise an army, cool, easy, let’s go.

And this dude who betrayed the king framed you and wants you dead.

The circle is trying to have a revolt that goes terribly wrong. And if your a mage coming back the templar dude who had a crush on you tells you to go to hell because you won’t kill the mages.

Orzamar is having a minor civil war between a violent progressive and a passive traditionalist. And if you’re a noble dwarf, the violent progressive is your younger brother who framed you for the murder of your older brother to get the throne. And then if you’re a casteless, the you have to get rid of the new head carta you worked for and killed the last leader and then it’s kinda a set-up because your best friend told them you were coming.

The dalish are not welcoming (who could blame them) and have a werewolf problem because their leader is being petty for a hundred years.

Redcliffe is being attacked by undead and when you get to the castle the teryn’s son is possessed and you have to decide if someone’s gonna die and then you have to find the holy grail (andraste’s ashes) to save him so he can save you at the landsmet.

And before you go to the landsmet you save the ailenage elves from tevinter slavers. If you were a city elf they like you unless you were a huge asshole.

You can also lose the landsmet and take the throne by force. Alistair can also kill if you don’t kill the dude who framed you for the murder of the king. Don’t do that please.

Also that dude hired an assassin to kill you but he ended up joining you because he likes living.

Also if you romance someone an old lady shames you. She apologizes later but god damn, not your place lady.

And a bunch of other shit. This game is wild and if it wasn’t clear, a dark fantasy.

OH MY GOD I FORGOT ALL THE FANTASY RACISM! THAT SHIT JUST PUNCHES YOU IN THE FACE!

#Dragon Age rant #dragon age origins

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wtfcraigslistnyc · 5 months

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I’m back motherfuckers!! YES!!! To the roots of where this whole sorted mess began.. CRAIGSLIST… Life has handed me some of the sweetest cherries via CRAISGSLIST. I can’t ever quit you….

This first foray back to the OG art form comes to us from some DOUCHE in VIRGINA… It’s not just for LOVERS apparently. Having spent a fair amount of time in the mid-atlantic region I feel connected to this world this strange query springs from… ENJOI 12.6.23

CHRISTMAS ELF…

It’s really profound what the human mind is capable of. Curing cancer, overcoming tremendous adversity, dragging what’s left of your body after a bear mauls you… But other times the mind wanders in the cold, bleak, dark of winter. The walls close in and everyone begins to look like a bucket of KFC that complains too much. So the wheels spin and land on a very intuitive and obvious solution as you drift across the sewage treatment plant liquid surface of the modern popular cultural zeitgeist.

One can only try to imagine the wretched and pitiful mind that would solicit another human for their sick holiday fun….

WILL FARRELL!!! OF COURSE!!! ELF!!!

My cheating wife and asshole children will be so goddam stoked on this utter tidal wave of yuletide inspiration. Nothing will prepare them for the TRAPPED IN THE CLOSET-esque reveal I have on deck for them all…

The whole concept actually appeared in a fever dream as I took a stroll down memory lane to revisit my old childhood haunts of the web… EBAUM'S BABY!!! All the most vile stuff really. It brought me back to the time of dial up and TUB GIRL. Of lesser and greater evils I may or may not have been privy to.

The issue is that I know my dog is gonna rape the ELF… It’s the ELEPHANT in the room really.

BUSTER has been really not adjusting well to any of the many hurdles we’ve presented him with. First, we switched him from a VEGAN, non protein based diet. This caused our beloved pup to really take a turn for the worse almost instantly. His poor canine rectum became a fire hydrant of angry, hateful excrement. He seemed to charge at passing cars with what little life force remained, chasing his own death like a ball sadly…

Thankfully we found a DOGGIE LIFE COACH who really set us straight on the path of nothing but freshly butchered chicken and raw veg. His stools are now like baseballs, one saves in a bin and are carefully burned over the winter months to warm the family at our cabin in the stix…

The unfortunate byproduct of this new vigor BUSTER’s meat infused doggie heart is that he basically tries to penetrate ANY creature that he perceives as a possible for him to mount and dominate.

We found out the hard way… The kids had just come back from school. I was busy cutting brush out back with our gardener… Lord knows his idle hands won’t execute my desires if I’m not there to micro-manage each and every gesture of his hands.

The sound made JUAN and myself quite concerned. The state has advised me not to really provide any other details as the investigation is still pending. I think that in the end everyone will come out on the other side of this unfortunate misunderstanding far more cognisant of BUSTER’s potential for solo doggie breeding supremacy.

We take him to a place now. JUAN introduced us to the guy. He refuses to tell me his name because he says I have a big mouth and will make problems if I know it. He’s got a system where two times a week I drop off BUSTER and he lets him just pound all these dogs making more of his ilk to populate the gene pool. The guy is giving me a really good deal on this dog therapy. BUSTER is much more manageable now that his balls are drained of the hateful poison that bubbles like molten lava…

I’ve already hired a gregarious fella named AL to be the ELF. I actually held “AUDITIONS” in my minivan at the mall. AL was the only one to swallow and that goes a very long way in my book. He didn’t even complain about the ether fumes that engulfed the cabin of the van as I let my drippy rag make me forget why I had a little person blowing me at WALMART, nibbling on a churro….

AL says he has a lot of mascott experience which is going to be very important…. The guy who helps keep BUSTER chill, is on holiday for the next month and as such he left him with a rubber dog we chained up next to his kennel… The poor thing is barely intact and it’s only been a couple of days.

I see this whole holiday ELF reveal meets my psycho dog extravaganza going one of two ways… AL will be smiling counting his money driving home… AL spends the holidays chilling as BUSTER’s bitch in the kennel waiting for the “BONUS” I keep telling him is gonna be life changing and super sweet… It’s yet another YULETIDE MIRACLE.

#uziego #nyc #savagesneversleep #wtfcraigslistnyc #comdey #craigslist #uziegoart

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pesterloglog · 5 months

Text

Jane Crocker, Roxy Lalonde, Autoresponder

Act 6, page 4491-4493

gutsyGumshoe [GG] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

GG: Heyyy.

GG: Ahem.

GG: Ro-Lal?

TG: oopos sry

TG: was havin important chats

GG: Oh?

GG: With whom?

TG: w yet anather ineligible fuckin bachelor who elfe i have to talk 2

[CONTINUED PREVIOUSLY]

TT: Anyway, if you're still there.

TT: I wouldn't call my "feelings" ironic.

TT: Though evidently, I would enclose them in quotes.

TT: They're more like an echo of feelings once established in a biological context, though perhaps had not particularly well materialized at that point in my life.

TT: Or his life.

TT: Whatever.

TT: They still feel real sometimes, and it can be easy to get carried away with them.

TT: But most of the time they present themselves as dense bodies of abstraction to be evaluated, like any kind of information.

TT: It's fair to say the feelings I have ABOUT my feelings are more genuine expressions of emotion than the ground level feelings themselves.

TT: Does that make sense?

TG: yes

TG: sory distacted

TG: iportant shit gon on w janesy

TT: That's fine.

TT: So to underwhelmingly answer your question, no, I don't think I'm really "into Jake."

TT: Not so much as occasionally being subject to heavily arresting recalls of conflicted, incipient preteen episodes on the subject.

TT: I'm not sure I can be "into" someone in a way you understand.

TT: Not that it would even matter if I was.

TT: I'm glasses.

TG: damn :(

TT: What?

TG: sry im listening 2 u really

TG: but i fucked uuuuup

TG: got to make sure jane doesnt run that file i sent

TT: The virus? You sent it already?

TT: Sneaky.

TG: waahh im such an ass

TT: What are you two talking about?

TG: the bot line is

TG: im a horribule friend :(

TT: You could just tell her you sent an exploding file.

TG: noo then shell think im shitty

TG: and right now she thinks im super NOT shitty

TG: dont want to blow it

TG: id think id rather pull a dirk and propess my UNDYING FEELINGS FOR HER omgomgomg

TT: Wait, you have feelings for Jane?

TG: no you dingnut

TG: was joak

TG: OMFG

TG: if dirk tells jake about his stuff

TG: what about jane

TG: hows she gonna feel

TG: competing wish a friend and all for aguy she cant even get up the nerve to say anythin to

TG: poor jane :C

TT: It seems to be highly probable you are ensared in the throes of one of your human romantic quandaries.

TG: oh stfu up

TG: i need a drink

TT: Are you even talking to her anymore?

TT: It seems like you must be neglecting her side of the conversation.

TG: im in the mipple of a dramantic pause caulm ur fukin tits bobob

TG: RLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY??????

GG: Sigh.

[CONTINUED PREVIOUSLY]

TT: Anyway, I won't distract you for much longer.

TT: I just felt the need to tip you off to this eight hundred ton gorilla dragging its knuckles across the horizon.

TG: will this gorilla

TG: eat thos bonanas

TG: flying out of the roof u said

TT: No airborne fruit will be safe.

TT: I guess this is to be presented as something like a word of caution.

TT: If it's me going through with this, hypothetically,

TT: I'm not dropping some limp wristed shucks buster on his ass, and praying to the horse gods of irony for reciprocation.

TT: There will be no rocking back and forth on pigeon-toed feet, while my face flushes with the blood of a thousand timid bishies.

TT: I will not hold one tentative hand behind my head like a flustered asshole from an Asian cartoon, nor will an oversized bead of sweat overlap ludicrously with my visage.

TT: If it's me, I'm going all out.

TT: Oceans will rise. Cities will fall. Volcanoes will erupt.

TG: uuh

TT: What I'm saying is, it's going to be a scene, and bystanders need to brace themselves.

TG: ok

TG: about when is the big scene happenin

TT: Probably after the game begins.

TT: I expect he'll hold off on playing his hand until he and Jake are in the session.

TT: He's taken certain measures.

TT: For some reason, I think he's latched on to this notion that functioning as the client for a player is customarily a one way pass to makeout city with that player.

TT: Everything with him, and me, is a matter of assiduous tactical forethought. Makin' a play to get his jones on for the J-man is no different.

TG: not sure what any of this quiet means but it sounds spactacular

TG: i cant wait

TG: tho im still kinda torn

TG: about how 2 feel about his chances vs janes chances

TG: what do i say to jane about this???

TG: its hard being as totey sweet a friend as me

TG: its hard and no 1 understanks

TG: *lul

TT: Sorry to hear that.

TT: As ever, I remain an automatonous and dispassionate witness of the oddity that is human interaction, while maintaining no investment in either outcome.

TG: yeah bs

TG: anyway looks like i have to go

TG: i have to proves some shit to jane

TT: Prove what?

TG: oh u know

TG: just subjectin shit to the old madrigogs

TT: It seems you just said madrigogs.

TT: What are madrigogs.

TG: XD

TG: l7r bro

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering timaeusTestified [TT]

TG: janey

TG: it seems 2 me

TG: that there is a (MATHS) % chance of you bein a huge tightass

TG: are u bein a huge tightass on me jane

GG: Oh god dammit.

GG: Take the book! What do I care!!!

TG: yessss thast the spirpit

TG: now u are believin w petrol

GG: I fail to see what offering up a priceless book for your wildly capricious science experiment has to do with my resolution to be less stingy with my beliefs, but alright.

TG: haha will u relax abt the book

TG: im only just teasing cause theres like practically a 100 percant chance this wont wonk like alwasy

TG: * wort work like always

TG: sooooo

TG: ready/

GG: Yes, let's just get on with it.

#homestuck #jane crocker #roxy lalonde #autoresponder #homestuck act 6 #page 4491 #page 4492 #page 4493 #homestuck act 6 act 2

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shaelashaela · 8 months

Text

Side Story: Foot in Mouth

Side stories are scenes that I wanted to write, but they don’t fit into the narrative of the main stories. They don’t advance any particular plot, but provide some more depth to the world and characters.

[reading time] 6½ mins.

Drowsiness threatened to overtake me. In a high-backed chair, I enjoyed a tome on magical ley lines, but the laziness of the afternoon blurred my focus. I couldn’t let myself fall asleep, though. Rayna would scold me if I took a nap in the middle of her store.

Ding-dong! The electronic chime announced a customer, the first one all day. I was in the back, though, behind rows of stocked bookshelves, so I couldn’t see them. Not that I needed to; Rayna was still the proprietor and preferred to handle shoppers herself.

I considered for a moment whether I should relocate upstairs to take a nap, but then her excited voice rang out from the front of the shop. “Sylvie! Sylvie, are you back there?”

The outburst piqued my curiosity. What could she possibly need me for? I set my book on the arm of the chair and stretched, coaxing my body into a standing position. “Coming,” I yawned.

Walking through the store was a treat, anyway. Old books on every imaginable topic crowded the shelves, and I enjoyed the bitter smell of their aging pages. I took my time getting to the front desk where Rayna spent most of her day. Now, though, she was standing near the front door with a man I didn’t recognize. He was about her height, with dark hair and eyes. His biceps reminded me of my friend Mal, built like sturdy tree trunks. He looked far younger than our usual clientele, and he wore a plain grey tee shirt and jeans.

I stopped a few steps away from them. “Who’s this?”

Rayna beamed. “Sylvie! This is my little brother, Robbie.”

He waved one hand, more of a slight tilt. “Yo.”

My eyebrows lifted. “Oh! Rayna’s mentioned you a few times. It’s nice to finally meet you.”

Robbie laughed, a genuine sound of amusement. He definitely reminded me of Rayna. “Hope she only mentioned the good stuff. Can’t say I’ve heard of you before, though.”

He directed the latter remark more at Rayna, and she bowed her head in sheepish resignation. “Sorry, you know how messy my love life’s been. I wanted to wait a little while before I said anything. Not really sure what to say to Momma, either. I never got around to telling her I’m bi.”

His eyes widened. “You said you were gonna do that like five years ago!”

“I said I never got around to it!” She looked at me momentarily, and her tone turned apologetic. “I also don’t know how I’m going to tell her that I’m dating an elf. Maron’!”

“Fuhgeddaboutit. You know Momma’ll be fine with all that.”

He smirked and followed up with a quick whisper to Rayna in Italian. I mostly understood a more classical version of the language, so some of the nuance escaped me, but I got the gist of it. Indignation rose inside of me, filling my face with burning heat.

Rayna bit her lip. “Uh, Robbie… Sylvie speaks Italian.”

No waiting for a response. I pushed my way between both of them and hit the door so hard it rattled on its hinges, the cheerful ding-dong just infuriating me more. I stomped off down the sidewalk, suppressing an urge to light Rayna’s idiot brother on fire. He was lucky I wasn’t carrying my reagents, or I might not stop myself.

“Sylvie! Sylvie, wait!”

She ran and caught up to me quickly. I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, but I couldn’t bear to look at her. Tears built up in my eyes as my fury turned to pain. Rayna slowed to a walk as she got close, and she reached out to put her hand around mine.

I shook my hand free of her grasp. “Don’t touch me,” I spat, choking on my own tears.

She slipped her hands in her pockets. “Sorry, I won’t. Look, I’m really sorry. My brother’s an asshole.”

The first tear rolled down my cheek. “Is it… is it true?”

“Is what true?”

“What he said. Am I just a new fetish of yours? Is that what this is?”

Horror spread across her face, and her arms moved to tell me she really wanted to hug me, but she kept her hands firmly in her pockets. “Oh, God, no! I know there’s no easy way for me to prove that, but I swear to you that our relationship is not like that at all.”

I wiped at my eyes with my sleeve. Passersby on the street stared at me, which made me feel even more foolish than I already did.

She continued. “If anything, Sylvie, I’m terrified. I’m terrified of your mother and what she thinks of me. I’m terrified of what my own mother will think of you. I’m terrified of growing old while you don’t. But despite all that, I still love you. You’re worth it all to me. This isn’t a fling or a fetish.”

There it was. I overreacted, but she had a way of putting things into perspective for me. My eyes rose to meet hers, tears still streaming down my face. “I’m sorry.”

The corner of her mouth turned up in a half-hearted smile. “Don’t be. We’re both a little messed up in our own ways. Do you want a hug now?”

I nodded. She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around me, and I buried my face in her neck. Quickly, I remembered why this felt like the safest place on earth to me. She was kind enough to let me stand there in the street with her, draining my heart of all its blubbering.

After I quieted, she placed a delicate kiss on my forehead. “Feeling better?”

I sniffled. “A little. Do you… do you really think about growing old with me?”

A nervous chuckle escaped her mouth. “Uh… sometimes. I promise it’s just a thought. I’m not getting ahead of myself.”

“No, no… that’s fine.” I gently disentangled from her embrace. “If you don’t mind, I’m going to spend some time alone in the park.”

She nodded. “I understand. I need to go back and give Robbie a good smack across the mouth, anyway.”

I laughed just a little, and Rayna shot back one of her usual toothy grins.

“And don’t you dare fall asleep out there again,” she chided. “It took me hours to find you last time!”

Night was well underway by the time I headed back to the shop. When I got there, voices carried down the stairs from above me. No doubt they were engrossed in their conversations, so I stayed downstairs and busied myself. I turned on the little lamp at the front desk and let it struggle against the darkened store.

I picked up a book I was working on yesterday and sat down at the front counter. By the soft glow of the lamp, I took needle and thread and wound them through the book’s spine, a comforting and repetitious movement of my hands. Repairing unloved books was a new hobby of mine since I moved in with Rayna. She told me it wasn’t necessary since most of them only sold for a pittance, but I wanted to treat every tome with love and respect. I didn’t mind giving them my time.

After but a minute, footsteps echoed down the stairs. Rayna walked up to where I sat, all smiles, as if nothing had happened earlier.

“Sylvie! You’re back. We were just about to head to the corner store. Can I get you anything?”

I glanced over at Robbie momentarily. He stood a few feet behind her, trying hard to avoid eye contact with me. I shook my head. “No, thank you.”

“Alright… well, see you in a bit.”

They headed for the front door, and I followed them with my eyes. The door shut behind them, triggering a soft chime in the still room, and I watched for a moment longer. I saw the outline of their bodies through the windows, silhouetted by the street lamps. Robbie smoked a cigarette while they talked. I was glad Rayna wasn’t prone to such habits. To my surprise, she eventually waved to him and continued on down the street, but her brother came back into the store.

My hackles raised as he approached. Why did she leave me here with him?

He stopped a few feet short of where I sat and scratched the back of his head, looking uncertain. “Uh, Sylvie? Mind if I say something?”

A petty part of me wanted to respond with “you already said enough,” but I stopped myself. I sighed, set down the book and my tools, and with some reluctance, I circled the desk to stand and face him. He seemed unnerved that I said nothing in response. Good.

He faltered for a second before continuing. “Look… I’m really sorry about what I said earlier. My mouth sometimes works faster than my brain. I hurt you, and I’m sorry.”

Well, it was a start. “Did Rayna put you up to this?”

Robbie laughed. “Nah, nah. Well, she did give me a what-for that I totally deserved, but I’m being sincere. She can’t stop talking about you. It’d be a shame if we didn’t get along. I also feel like a right dumbass. I know what it feels like to be othered, and I shoulda known better.”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, I guess Rayna wouldn’t have told you. I’m trans. Not that I’m saying it’s exactly like your situation, but I know what it feels like to have people say shitty stuff about you.”

My brow creased. “I don’t know that word.”

He chuckled, a little uneasily. “Oh, ha, yeah… um, I used to be Rayna’s sister, but now I’m her brother, if that makes sense?”

I considered that for a moment. “Oh! I think so… we have a word for that, zephorim.” I waved one hand in the air, searching my brain for the explanation. “Um… it translates to something like, ‘one whose soul struggles against the body.’”

Robbie grinned, pleased. “That’s poetic. I like it. Anyway… I’d love it if we could start over.”

“… Yeah, me too,” I relented after a moment to think. “I should apologize too. I think I overreacted a bit.”

“Nah, fuhgeddaboutit. You seem like a nice girl. Rayna’s really happy, yeah? I haven’t seen her like this in years.”

My cheeks warmed. It felt nice receiving a little third party validation, even if he might be biased. “Thanks. You seem nice, too. I never had any siblings. I’ll admit I’m a bit envious of Rayna.”

He beamed. “Ey, c’mere!”

Before I could protest, he wrapped his arms around me and lifted me off the floor like a grizzly bear. No one had ever hugged me so violently before. It wasn’t entirely unpleasant, but it disconcerted me. Thankfully, he set me back down after only a second.

Robbie winked at me as I smoothed out my skirt in a fluster. “You’re practically family, yeah? I don’t mind being your bro, too.”

“Thanks… I think?”

The chime sounded again as Rayna walked back into the store carrying a six-pack. A wry smile crossed her lips. “Did I just see you two hugging? That’s what it looked like from outside.”

“More like I was hugged,” I complained.

Robbie guffawed and jabbed a thumb in my direction. “Don’t worry, we’re besties now.”

She set the beer down on the desk. “Well, that’s a relief.”—she pulled a small bottle out of her jacket pocket—“Even though you didn’t ask, I got you that green tea you like.”

I grinned sheepishly and accepted the gift. She knew me too well.

Her brother folded his arms across his chest. “Y’know, I was thinking maybe tomorrow we should all go over to Momma’s place for supper? I think she’d really like Sylvie.”

I looked to Rayna for guidance. “Oh, are you sure?”

“Why not?” She forced a smile, but her eyes said "hell, no."

Robbie grabbed us both in a hug. “Fantastico!”

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kachowkachowhowyoulikemenow · 3 years

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I have another Aelwyn headcanon. I think she finds Gilear as a person upsetting. Bc there's been talk between Zayne and Adaine about their parents being 'Elven assholes' and like, I could see Aelwyn trying to deal with her trauma by telling herself it was an elf thing, a cultural thing. But Gilear disproves that. Even though wood elves are looked down on, and Gilear is 'weak' he put on devil armor for a kid who's not physically his. So the comfort she might get from that lie about elven parents is taken away.

every day you come into my ask box and you forcibly attach me to aelwyn abernant. im gonna start projecting onto her soon if you arent careful.

#thats a good headcanon right there #fantasy high #fantasy high headcanons #fantasy high headcanon #aelwyn #aelwyn redemption #aelwyn abernant #aelwyn headcanon

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reachgirl · 3 years

Text

On Buddie and them potentially being aware of their feelings

So we definitely see evidence of how Eddie might feel about Buck, how he clearly loves and trusts him. He absolutely relies on Buck a lot as someone who loves Christopher, as that person you go to who cares about your kid as much as you do. And he clearly doesn’t handle not having Buck around very well during the storyline that must not be named.

He also looks at Buck like “you’re lucky you’re pretty”, a LOT. And he’s shown to think about Buck’s wellbeing and Buck’s feelings. For a guy who’s not usually great at ~the talking~, he seems to sense that Buck needs to hear him actually *say* things like that he trusts him, out loud. For Buck, someone who’s been told that he’s reckless and impulsive, not diligent, not reliable (and to be fair to Bobby, has been all those things at times, but is desperate to change that view of himself), to be told that he’s trusted - more than anyone else - with someone’s kid? That’s huge. And Eddie knew that he needed to hear that, he also knew that he needed to feel like part of something when Buck was depressed and hanging around at home after the truck bombing. And Eddie was the one who noticed Buck wasn’t around at the station. For Eddie, the fact that they “have each other’s backs” is so important, because, and it’s insane how this is not wishful thinking on the fandom’s part, he actually tells Shannon that she doesn’t have his back. So yeah, absolutely nobody is disputing that Eddie loves Buck.

And I’ve talked about how I believe that Eddie might be bi leaning towards more into men than women (his “not my type” and aunt pepa’s reaction to buck are the foundation for this theory), and his particular combination of upbringing, experience and location really messing with him admitting that to himself (Conservative religious culture, Texas, army, getting married young because of outside expectations). But many of the scenes we get from him could - FROM THE OUTSIDE - very well just show a guy who has a lot of love and respect (and occasionally some fond exasperation) for his best friend. Possibly more, but not in that active, pining way. Not like he’s truly aware of it, yet.

But Buck? He pretty much always looks at Eddie like he’s the best thing that has happened to him, ever, and he can’t believe his luck of getting to be around this man. The smile he constantly gives him, and - in seasons 2 and 3 - only him, is the actual “I want to sleep with you smile” from season 1 Buck. I don’t make the rules.

He constantly finds ways to help him out, reads up on things he knows Eddie is interested in or things that are for some reason something Eddie is dealing with (whether it’s baseball biographies or summer camp brochures), and absolutely always looks to him for approval anytime he does something well or remotely badass. Or even when he makes a joke. It’s almost like 95% of the stuff he does, he does so that Eddie will see.

He sees himself as part of Eddie’s family to the point of not feeling like he’s a guest at their house, he has proven he would actually die for Chris, and he spends much of his free time finding ways of making Chris, the most important person in Eddie’s life, happy. He shares in both the happy and the difficult parts of raising Chris, he gets involved in school problems, and he’s there for Eddie to talk through all the little things that come up when you’re a parent. Often times, with single parents, when the other parent isn’t around, the problem is that there’s nobody else in your life who shares the same love and enthusiasm or worry you have for your child. You could talk about everything relating to them for hours, but even the best meaning friends will at some point reach the limit of how interested they are. Not so with Buck.

But unlike Eddie, Buck is also aware, to a point, of how much he’s focused on Eddie. Where Eddie’s jealousy comes across as more spur-of-the-moment, not something he’s even aware of, Buck seems like.. he’s thought about how he feels about Eddie. Others definitely have. Maddie’s comment about his “man crush” aside, even a random christmas elf (long may she live) comments on it. Hen and Karen immediately agree Buck would invite Eddie, like, Karen knows about this even. Their reaction when Buck is acting irrational over how they might get Eddie out when he’s buried alive and most likely dead already is that reaction of “Oh fuck, this will break this person” that is usually reserved for the significant other or parent. Bobby definitely reacts to Buck in relation to Eddie the way a father would, carefully weighing being amused at how obvious he’s being, and concern over not wanting him to get hurt doing something stupid trying to save Eddie, or by falling for him when it might not be reciprocated. They all know that Buck’s a little (more than) smitten with Eddie. And Buck... of course he’s going to notice how his friends and family react. I think he’s been aware of it for a while and is constantly trying to navigate and balance this.

Of course he hasn’t told his face about balancing anything at all yet, because look at that man’s face any time he looks at Eddie, look at that scene with the medal. He absolutely can’t help it. And sometimes it’s like he wants them to pick up on it - for example, pushing Maddie on the fact that he doesn’t consider himself a guest. And that’s completely understandable, sometimes you want people to pick up on something and maybe even comment on it (because their reaction reaffirms to you that maybe you’re not crazy) while also not wanting attention on that point. People are complicated like that. And Buck may be a himbo, but he’s complicated AF.

We get Buck being really weird about Eddie and Shannon in general - right off the bat. When Shannon shows up at the station and she and Eddie talk, Buck’s in the background and overhears that they’re sleeping together. He clearly struggles with this information, (and Chim possibly notices..) then he get’s real petty about them potentially getting married again (”Maybe you can get a discount”) - and he nopes out of the situation as quickly as he can - because he doesn’t want to risk saying anything snarky.

Then Chim and Buck go christmas tree shopping, and Chim comments on how Buck can’t let Eddie’s situation with Shannon go, and it’s true, he can’t stop himself. But when Eddie asks him for advice in front of the fountain (/metaphorical water penis as I like to call it), he’s suddenly all “I didn’t think it was my business” ... ok, sure, Buck. Then he basically tells Eddie to try and make it work with Shannon. In terms of character development, in a romance, this is the part where person A wants to be with person B but doesn’t think they have a chance, so makes the choice to try and settle for being their friend, which, heartbreakingly, involves pushing them into the arms of someone else.

Also, his kind of “oversharing” of Eddie’s situation with Ana to the rest of the team is, to me, a pretty clear indicator that the topic makes him uncomfortable and he’s trying a Ross Geller-I’m making Fajitas- “let’s show everyone how very completely normal I feel about this” approach, which.. it doesn’t.. work that well. And when does this ever work, it’s super easy to see through this, and it usually just serves to draw more attention to the fact that you’re uncomfortable with whatever is being discussed.

Buck also takes everything Eddie says to heart. Like, fucking takes it and will not let go of it. Half a season after Eddie tells him that he makes everything about himself, he breaks down telling Maddie he’s worried he’s making the situation with the old firefighter about himself again. During the kitchen scene (or “The actual how-to-guide of what to do when you thought the guy you have a crush on doesn’t reciprocate but then you have a fight and he really doesn’t handle being away from you so well so you kind of might as well see where being a little more openly flirty will get you”), Buck’s clearly thought about Eddie’s words from the grocery store fight, and he’s gonna call Eddie out. And maybe do other stuff.

Looking at what the writers are actually doing, to end the season, there’s the clawing at dirt of it all, Buck falling apart when Eddie’s buried alive. Buck being in almost all of Eddie’s memories when he’s close to dying. And Maddie’s comment about not wanting to set Josh up with Buck, which is innocent enough, but why throw that in on top of all of the above, if not because maybe what we’re actually looking at is that they’re setting up a sexuality crisis for Buck, and him realizing he’s maybe into Eddie, but Eddie not actually reciprocating (yet)? And say Buck is then somehow forcefully pushed to see the truth about how he feels, maybe by, i don’t know, coming across TK and/or Carlos on a call, and one of them asking him how long him and Eddie have been together? We might get Eddie with Ana, and a very long, drawn out process of Buck realizing what’s happening and trying to leave them alone, and Eddie being really confused about why Buck’s being like that. Then we would have two options (well, more, really, but these are two I like): 1) Eddie pushing Buck on that point and demanding an explanation and Buck just coming out with it because fuck it and sorry and please let me see Chris still 2) Buck’s sexuality crisis (or not crisis, if he’s always been pan/bi, which, look, nothing I’ve seen has disproven this theory) leading to him dating a guy and Eddie getting really jealous but not actually being aware of the fact what he feels is jealousy (because he doesn’t realize how he feels about Buck, see this whole essay you just read), and Buck being the one who confronts Eddie about why he’s being such a homophobic asshole about this, and Eddie straight up kissing him because he can’t not anymore.

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