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florencemtrash · 10 months

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The Ballad of the Shadowsinger

Azriel x Reader Oneshot

“Because I’m waiting for my mate to call me home.” The Shadowsinger said, “Because I’m waiting to die.”

Warnings: ANGST with a happy ending, mentions of attempted SA and suicidal ideation (they're very brief, but please do read with caution)

Author's note: I finished this at 3am last night and I think it's pretty apparent... buuuuuut I'm going to post it anyway. Enjoy...

The Shadowsinger arrived one winter night, curling into existence on the border of town like cream through coffee. Jadhan was only a boy at the time - painfully human with a broken leg that had never healed properly. The Midlands were a terrible place for a child to grow up - a place where the only thing more unstable than the ground was its sense of safety.

But things changed when the Shadowsinger arrived, bringing with him gold and the brutal violence required to scare off the bandits and murders that slipped in from the nearby Lordship. And when the Lord came for the Shadowsinger’s head, it was the fae male was the one who walked away from the fight. Except it wasn’t a fight. It was a slaughter.

Jadhan was thirty-seven now with three young boys that had come in a cluster, forcing their way into the world one after another. Sasha had never been quite pleased with him for that, but her love for her sons and her husband outweighed the pain and hardship in the end.

The boys - Mikhail, Alzhar, and Zhik - ran around the tavern, ducking beneath tables and barstools while their height still allowed it. The Shadowsinger watched them with the faintest of smiles as they clambered about, begging for more attention from his shadows.

There was little known about the Shadowsinger this deep into the Continent, but whispers still passed through the mouths of travelers at the inn. The most common piece of gossip was that he was a Prythian outlaw - banished to the Continent after attempting to kill his Lord. Jadhan didn’t know - and he figured he would never find out.

The Shadowsinger was so quiet that no one even knew his real name. They all called him Shadowsinger - Shadow for short. He disappeared into the woods at night and stalked into town come morning, but give a shout at any time and he would be there, flying overhead like a black stormcloud.

“On the house, Shadow.” Jadhan said, dropping the glass onto the sticky counter. Whisky neat, two fingers - just the way he liked it.

The Shadowsinger picked it up, swirling the amber liquid around like he hoped it would start talking to him, “You say that every night.”

“That’s because a free drink is the least I could get you.” Jadhan tipped his head towards the rickety stage where the local songbirds were setting up. The singer, Phaedra, had her eyes on Shadow, sending love and gratitude his way like a flood, “Phaedra’s been telling everyone what you did for her. You know, with the Morois boy.”

Shadow grimaced, taking his first sip. He grimaced again. The whiskey was home-brewed and tasted like it. Everyone in town said a shot of the stuff could kill a man, but Shadow was hardly a man, and more shadow than fae.

Lev Morois had had his eyes on Phaedra for a while now. And he didn’t like to be denied anything, especially women. Normally he traveled to the Lordship for his fill, and he would have been better off going there last night. Instead he’d forced his way into Phaedra’s home… and Shadow had made sure he’d never be able to hurt a woman like that ever again.

“How old are your boys now, Jadhan?” His voice was deep and smoky.

The trio neared closer, as if they knew they’d been summoned. The eldest, Mikhail, nearly crashed into the countertop, forgetting he had to bend down now. A tendril of black shadow shot out, muffling the blow and corralling him back out onto the open dancefloor with the rest of the children.

Jadhan sighed and rubbed at a burned spot on the counter, “Too old, and growing faster than weeds.”

It was a sweet pain for Azriel to see the three brothers romping around. It was almost winter and soon enough they’d be wrestling in the frosted fields, shoving snow down each other’s shirts, and hurling it at each other's heads.

When was the last time he’d seen his brothers? Cassian had stopped by twenty-five years ago, shocked and scared to see Azriel looking so wretched. The next time Azriel’s shadows had warned him, and they’d sent Cassian away.

Rhysand was a different story… he’d never forgiven Azriel for what he’d done - and rightfully so - but that didn’t make the pain any easier to swallow. That didn’t make Azriel miss them any less.

He tossed the rest back and, to Jadhan’s surprise, he let the barkeep refill it.

Again.

And again.

Phaedra’s voice crooned over the crowd, settling over drunk men and women like a warm blanket until it was time for their sober partners to drag them home. Those who were alone either settled into the hard booths for a nap or resigned themselves to a stumble home in the dark. They’d all make it to their beds in the end - The Shadowsinger would see to that.

He dropped a gold coin onto the counter - triple what the night’s libations actually cost. It was the briefest of stumbles that had Jadhan gripping onto the male’s shoulder and forcing him back into his seat.

Azriel wasn’t drunk. It would take an ocean of human liquor to get a fae drunk and then some. But he was starting to feel something.

“I got a pinch of ambrose from a merchant passing through.” Shadow’s eyes snapped up to Jadhan, who only raised his hands in surrender, “Hey, hey, hey, I know you don’t drink my whiskey for the taste, so I thought I'd put something in there to remind you of home. Something to loosen you up like liquor is supposed to.”

The Shadowsinger winced at that word: Home.

“Very well.” He said.

The boys had gone home with Sasha hours ago, and without them running about with their usual compatriots, the tavern seemed dull. Now was no longer the time for dancing and riotous laughter. Now was the time for the sad drunks and those who didn’t want to go home.

But Azriel wasn’t drunk and he desperately wanted to go home.

It was the shame that kept him rooted to the stool like a stubborn weed… that and Rhysand’s promise that if he ever laid eyes on Azriel again, he’d rip the wings off his back.

Jadhan seemed to understand that about him, leaning over the counter on sturdy arms thick as tree trunks. His leg was still lame, always had been and always would be, but that had never held him back much.

“What’re you doing here, Shadow?”

His hazel eyes flickered up.

“What’s it been? Twenty-five years you’ve been in town now?”

“Thirty. Exactly.”

So that was why the Shadowsinger had drank so much that night. It was to commemorate the sad, terrible anniversary of his banishment to the Midlands.

“Don't you think that's long enough? I don’t mean any offense, but don't you have anywhere else to go? Friends? Family?”

The male gritted his teeth and Jadhan had the sinking feeling he'd just poked the bear.

“I thought I was wanted here.”

“Of course you are. Hell, we’d all be dead or piss poor if it weren’t for you.” Jadhan shook his head, “I don’t know what you’re running from - if you’re a thief, a murderer, a treasonous bastard or all of the above-”

Shadow flinched, actually flinched, and Jadhan knew it was all of the above.

“But whatever it is,” He continued, “I think you’ve made up for it.”

Azriel stilled, shadows continuing to swirl around the wet, empty glass in front of him.

How he wished those words were true, but only a human would think thirty years was a long time. They were nothing if not optimistic.

“No. I haven’t.” Shadow said flatly. Silence stretched between them, thick and heavy, until Jadhan finally sighed and went to clear the glass.

“I had a mate.” He whispered the words so quietly, Jadhan almost didn’t hear him.

His thick eyebrows disappeared into his receding hairline. He didn’t know much about fae customs and the ones he did know about were often violent, strange, or both… usually both. But he had a great deal of respect for mating bonds and understood they were prized above all else to fae.

“Had?”

Shadow’s lips flattened into a thin line and Jadhan could have sworn his eyes began to brim with years.

The Shadowsinger nodded stiffly.

“Dead?”

Shadow gritted his teeth and nodded once more, wings drooping low enough to brush against the sawdust packed floor.

Jadhan sighed so deeply he seemed to shrink into himself, and Azriel was once again struck by how quickly humans aged.

Silver streaks were already beginning to color his temples and his leg was getting stiffer and stiffer each day. It wouldn't be long until he was forced to swallow his pride and buy a cane like Sasha had been suggesting.

It seemed like just yesterday Jadhan had limped his way into the woods, calling out for the Shadowsinger with a copper coin clenched in his fist and a bargain to make.

Kill my father, and I will do anything you ask of me. Anything at all.

There had been such determination in the little boy’s body that Azriel hadn’t hesitated to fold his small fingers back over the coin and then do what he had been told… to do what he’d always been told to do.

“I’m sorry, Shadow.” He shook his graying hair, “I’m so sorry.”

Azriel grimaced, fists tightening until they turned pale, “Don’t feel sorry for me. Don’t you dare.”

He frowned, “And why not?”

The Shadowsinger stilled and got quiet again, “Because it was my fault. I killed her.”

Jadhan, for all his mortal naivete, didn’t look surprised at his answer. He only twisted his mouth to the side in thought before asking once again, "Why are you here, Shadow? Why don't you leave?"

Azriel looked at him, hazel eyes filled with despair.

He would never tell Jadhan this, but he’d always been envious of humans for one thing - they could die of old age. They could be killed easily. So easily that all it would take was one flick of Azriel's wrist and Jadhan would be no more.

Fae were not so easy to kill, and their only end was a violent one. Maybe that was why Rhys had banished him to the middle of the Continent where life was harsh but simple, and fae were nowhere to be found.

No one here was strong enough to kill him. Azriel would know - he’d spent the first five years on the Continent searching for a way to die and getting into so many bloodbaths it had lost its luster.

“Because I’m waiting for my mate to call me home.” The Shadowsinger said, “Because I’m waiting to die.”

___

There were many reasons Azriel built his house in the woods. Firstly, he liked the privacy Secondly, when the nightmares came, there was no telling the damage he could do.

Tonight’s dreams were especially violent and cruel to him.

Elain appeared before him, sweet and delicate as a dove and despite knowing better, he couldn’t help but follow her into the darkness like a fly to a carnivorous flower. It wasn’t her fault - he should have known better than to drag them both into this mess. She’d been reckless, hungry for some semblance of control in this new and strange world, and he had been all too willing to play the role of the selfless knight.

When she kissed him it felt wrong, but like every other night, he was too powerless to push away. This was how it had happened, and there was no changing that.

She whispered against his lips, “Thank you for coming for me.”

Azriel’s stomach twisted, because two people had gone on the mission into Beron’s lair, and two people had come out. Azriel had wrapped his arms around Elain’s silky body after saving her, and left you behind.

He followed Elain further, chasing her shimmering pink skirts onto the Autumn Court battlefield where she dove into the grasses and disappeared.

This was where it truly went wrong.

He caught sight of you on the hill, blood blooming like roses from where the ash arrows pierced your flesh. Your wings were gone and you leaned too far backward, still feeling their phantom weight against your back. That was what it had taken to bring you down. That was what it had taken for Beron to break you.

It was like a bolt of lightning running through his body when the bond snapped into place. Your bruised eyes shot open and you fought against the chains, horror freezing your heart.

Azriel would know, because he felt it all.

“AZ! NO!”

Beron’s ax caught the light as it came down on your neck and this wonderful thing he’d dreamt about for over five hundred years was snatched away from him.

Azriel shot up in bed, skin slick and suffocating under the blankets. He kicked them off his body, taking big, desperate gulps of air as his stomach and shadows settled down.

He rubbed his chest, feeling that hollow space where the bond used to be.

He’d had you for less than a minute… he should have had an eternity with you. You should have had an eternity with all of them.

On the day you died, Rhys and Cassian had also lost a sister. Feyre and Nesta had lost a best friend. Cassian may have been quick to forgive him, but Rhys could never. He’d already lost one sister. Nothing could have prepared him to lose you too.

Shadows swarmed around him and he already knew his powers had wrecked the roof once again. Moonlight streamed through the newly made hole in the ceiling, pooling around his shaking form. He imagined it was the Mother staring down at him with her unblinking eye. Disappointed. Angry.

The mating bond had been utterly wasted on him.

“I’m-I’m sorry, Y/n.” He gasped out, trembling. He wrapped his wings around his shaking shoulders, as if that would be enough to shield him from what he’d done.

Once again he was that little boy trapped in the cellar. Abandoned. Unloved. Alone. But this time he deserved it.

“Please. Please.” He begged. He begged for the madness to take him. He begged for an end to his eternal life.

“I want to come home.” He sobbed. “Please. I want to come home.”

You stood before him at the foot of the bed - a vision that had arrived three days after coming to the Midlands and never left. You looked at him sadly, your white dress hanging still despite the breeze that flowed through the room. But you didn’t say a word. You didn’t say anything at all.

___

Jadhan was fifty-five now. The Shadowsinger still came to the tavern every night, drank his whiskey on the house, and left once the songs were over.

Mikhail had left at eighteen, chasing after opportunities on the edge of the Continent. Zhik had died the year before - the youngest and the weakest of the trio. Not even the Shadowsinger could fight the cold that came for him in the Winter and stole him away before Spring.

Now it was Alzhar and Jadhan that ran the tavern. Alzhar who poured the Shadowsinger his drinks.

“On the house.” He said, sliding the glass along the countertop. Whiskey. Two fingers. Just how the Shadowsinger liked it.

“Thanks, Alzhar.” He raised the glass in the air before tossing it back in one shot, grimacing. Either he was getting older, or the whiskey had gotten worse.

Snow flurried past the windows, more rain than anything else.

“Happy Solstice day.” The Shadowsinger said with the faintest of smiles.

“Happy Solstice day.”

It was no grand holiday in the Midlands, and it certainly could never hold a candle to the festivities that were going on in Velaris, but still, Azriel would take whatever comfort he could get.

Phaedra had quietly retired from singing, opting to strum along with her guitar in the background. But her daughter led the band now, a vibrant star in the midst of these quiet lands with a smoky voice that was only rivaled by her mother.

“Happy Solstice day, everyone!” The tavern-goers cheered and a new generation of children shrieked from their spots closest to the stage. “Now I know it’s not looking too great outside, but we all know what dear old, Phaedra says.”

“Are you calling me old, Miss Devra?” Phaedra hollered, red painted lips turned down in a frown.

“I’m calling you a dear, Mama. You’re still as young as a rosebud in April.”

“That’s right!” Alzhar whooped. Phaedra winked and blew her future son-in-law a kiss.

Devra’s smile was positively radiant, “Alright, alright well whatever. She says daisies look brightest when they’re down in the shits, but that’s not really the most appetizing turn of phrase now is it?”

Everyone erupted in a mixture of laughter and cheer.

“Come on now, Dev.” Alzhar called out, “You’ve kept us waiting long enough. Sing!”

She rolled her eyes playfully, “Well since you asked so kindly,” She cleared her throat and began to croon,

“When my mama first warned me you’ve got trouble on your tail, I told her foxes are quick runners and my heart ain’t just for sale. I won’t be wooed by sweet flowers or sugar tea on ice, I just want someone who’ll love me and who’ll never think twice. I’ve-”

The tavern door burst open, letting in a howling blast of night-chilled air tinged with rain and frost. Everyone cringed back except Shadow, clutching at their thick coats and gasping at the sight of the being that came in from the darkness.

The female was anything but cold with her shining, warm eyes and radiant skin. She glowed like she'd been brushed with an otherworldly glimmer. She was sunlight shooting through crystal.

Dev stopped singing immediately, her hands slipping from the worn out strings with a strangled thrum.

The Shadowsinger stumbled, actually stumbled, to his feet, and the world seemed to fall silent.

Shadows shot out towards her, curling around her legs and licking the hem of her midnight blue coat. She was the moonlit darkness given form, delicate and fierce at the same time.

“Azriel.” She breathed out, finally giving a name to the nameless fae. “Azriel.” She repeated, still in disbelief.

The Shadowsinger - Azriel - walked forward without a sound, his scarred hands shaking at his sides.

She looked ready to throw her arms around him. Whether it was to embrace him or strangle him was yet to be seen.

Before she could make a move or say anything further, he dropped to his knees, head bowed and trembling. He swallowed thickly, keeping his eyes trained on the floor between her feet like he was scared to even look at her straight on.

If he had been looking at her, he would have seen the horrified shock that parted her lips and widened her eyes.

He pulled out that sleek obsidian blade he carried with him everywhere. The knife seemed to hum, the silent sound reverberating through the room and causing the air above it to warp.

Everyone knew that that knife was as much a part of him as his wings. But he held it out to her now like an offering, wings stretching open so that everyone could see the orange glow of the fire through the thin membrane, and the tendons that flowed through them like rivers.

Alzhar looked to his father in confusion. Was this some fae custom he wasn't aware of? Should they all be bowing to her? Perhaps she was their queen.

But his father only let out a slow breath, shoulders sinking down.

The Shadowsinger was the picture of reverent misery, and he would let her take whatever she wanted for her revenge.

His wings.

His life.

Anything...

Because I’m waiting for my mate to call me home.

That was what the Shadowsinger had revealed to him years ago, and Jadhan had never forgotten it.

Because I’m waiting to die.

Her beautiful face crumpled, then turned resolute. She ignored the blade, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt and hauling him up to his feet. Azriel’s eyes blew open in surprise.

“You bastard. You absolute bastard.” She said, her silky voice shaking, “I’ve been looking for you for years.”

“Y/n,” Azriel whispered reverently, “I-”

She slammed her lips against his, swallowing whatever desperate apology had been about to escape his mouth.

The Shadowsinger froze, then slowly melted into her touch, wrapping his arms around her waist so tightly it was a miracle her ribs didn’t snap. Shadows swirled around the pair in a perfect mixture of light and dark - like moonlight bleeding through winter clouds.

No one in the tavern could stand to look away. They were absolutely transfixed. Some great power was moving in the world and they could feel it. Magic or not, it demanded to be felt.

When the two fae finally pulled away from each other, gasping for breath, something in the earth seemed to crack open and shake the ground, releasing pressure that had been building for hundreds and hundreds of years.

Tears slipped out of her eyes, salty and not entirely unwelcome.

“Oh, Az.” She whispered, cradling his face with one hand and clutching her chest with the other. The Shadowsinger was weeping now, curling into her like a vine seeking sunlight, “How could I have forgotten this?”

He buried his face in her neck, breathing in the scent of elderflower and mountain pine like a man starved. His shadows grew around him, thick and powerful. And before anyone could even let out a strangled gasp, they disappeared with a whisper of smoke and shadow.

You reappeared in darkness, holding Azriel’s shaking body against you like an anchor to a ship.

“I’m here, Az. I’m here.” You gently shushed him, tangling your fingers through his hair.

You scanned the room finding nothing but a rickety bed and a dresser in the corner by way of furniture, and a small pile of firewood against the wall.

Moonlight streamed in through the roof and you held out a hand, latching onto the rays and weaving them together so tightly they filled the room with a silver glow.

“Az.” You whispered, all your attention turned back on him, on your mate. "Az." You gently shook him, pressing fervent kisses to his temple until he finally lifted his eyes.

Azriel looked exhausted, purple bruises shading the hollows beneath his gorgeous eyes.

“How-” Azriel gasped, “How is this-”

“Bryaxis brought my body to the Cauldron.” You finished, equally out of breath, “It took him years to put me back together but… he did it. He did it, Az.”

Azriel closed his eyes, sinking to his knees. This time you let him fall. And you fell with him, climbing into his lap so he could bury his face in your wind-swept hair.

Home.

You smelled like home to him.

“Promise me." He begged, "Promise me you’re real, Y/n. Please, promise me. I’ll-I'll do anything." He could feel you on the other end of the bond, your heart pulsing and alive. But… he didn’t know if he'd be able to survive if he woke in the morning to find that this was all some terribly perfect dream.

“I’m here, Az. I’m here.” You replied thickly, “I’m here and I’m whole.” You tugged off your coat, throwing it somewhere behind you, and pulled down the neck of your sweater. A thick line of scar tissue wrapped around your throat, one of the many physical reminders of the horrors Beron had put you through.

Azriel stilled, one hand daring to trace the pale flesh with a feather-light touch. “I… I did this.”

“No...No.” You whispered, brushing away the moisture that had collected on his cheeks, “You didn’t do this, Az.”

“I left you behind.” His voice broke. “I took Elain and I left you behind. Y/n, I’m so sorry. Please, I’m so sorry.”

You flinched and closed your eyes. It was one of your worst memories to date - the sight of Azriel’s broken face as the first ash arrow caught you in the back and brought you to the ground. The second was what had done you in, piercing through the membrane of your wings and digging into the ground, pinning you there.

Azriel had only gripped Elain’s golden form closer to his body. He could only fly one of you out, and in that moment he had made his choice and leapt into the sky.

Azriel felt your emotion through the bond and desperation flooded his system once again.

He couldn’t lose you. Not again. Not like this. Not when he had so much to make up for.

“I know what I did, Y/n. I know it was unforgivable, but I swear to you I will do anything you ask. Whatever it takes. If you’ll just give me a chance, I- ”

“Shhhhhhh.” You shook your head, pressing your finger to his lips and silencing him. “I forgive you, Az.” You said, cupping his face.

He immediately leaned into your touch, craving the feeling of your soft skin against his.

“I don’t-I don't want to think about that anymore. Trust me, I’ve spent the last half a century agonizing over it.” You said, smiling without humor.

His hands rubbed up and down your back, tracing the ruined remnants of your wings and silently begging you to explain.

You hesitated, collecting your words and speaking them carefully, “I would have come sooner but… I was so scared and confused about everything. My body didn’t feel like mine anymore without my wings with-'' Your hand flew up to your throat on instinct.

Azriel gently pulled your fingers away, kissing the pads of your fingertips all the way to your palm, and then your wrist. His lips brushed against the pulsing vein as soft as a feather. It was such a small point of contact, but it grounded you to reality.

“I couldn’t remember anything. It was like… like I was starting from scratch. Building my life from the ground up.”

Azriel repeated the gesture with your other hand, soft lips skimming over your skin until you shivered, “I’m sorry I wasn’t there.” He whispered softly, “I should have been there.”

“You didn’t know.”

“I should have known.”

You looked at him for a long time, drinking in the sight of him and refamiliarizing yourself with his face. He did the same with you.

He looked tired and thinner than you remembered, the elegant planes of his face now harsh and sharp. But buried beneath all those years of loneliness, he was still there - your Azriel. The male who never did anything in half-measures. The male who couldn’t help but make some of the most impulsive decisions you’d ever seen in your life, and also some of the most careful.

Gods, you’d missed him.

You'd missed talking to him and laughing with him. You'd missed the simple joy of being in his presence and the way that the world seemed to fall with hush whenever he entered a room.

“I came for you as soon as I remembered.” You brushed a strand of inky black hair from his forehead, and then flicked him. Hard. “But you just had to go and disappear on the Continent without a trace.”

That wasn’t completely true. He’d left bloody, brutal footprints for a while, but those had dried up too quickly.

The smile Azriel gave was weak and dull, but it was a start, “I’m sorry I kept you waiting, Y/n.”

“That’s alright." You murmured against his lips before kissing him, "You can make it up to me.”

Azriel’s heart leapt in his chest, and the bond responded in kind, singing louder than a choir of a thousand songbirds. Even after all this time, even after everything, the Shadowsinger hoped.

“Y/n-” That light began to dim, hateful voices whispering in his ear that he was unworthy of you, that he would destroy this chance at happiness just as swiftly as he’d done the first time, that he would ruin it all, “I don’t deserve-”

“Stop it, Az.” Your words were soft but commanding, “I don’t care about what you think you deserve or don’t deserve. I want you. I want my best friend back. I want you back.” You wiped the tears from your cheeks, “I want you back in Velaris, and if it turns out I’m still pissed at you for everything, we’ll figure it out, ok?”

You took a shaky breath and Azriel looked up at you in awe. He gathered you in his arms and captured your lips in a softer, more gentle kiss. A kiss that said, I’m tired. I’m so so tired and for the first time in my life I’m going to force the voices that tell me terrible things to be silent.

And it worked for a spell, but Azriel was pulling away again, looking guilty.

“Rhys-”

“I’ve already handled Rhys.”

His brow arched up every so slightly. Your guilty eyes flitted to the side.

You loved Rhys like a brother, and you fought with him like siblings do. That was why the last thing you'd done before leaving Velaris was force him to lift the banishment... and then you'd punched him in the face.

“I wasn’t exactly happy with him when I found out he banished you to the Continent. And to the Midlands too. I’ve heard it’s terribly boring here.”

Azriel smiled, and this time it was a genuine one full of love and relief, “Everywhere is terribly boring without you. And terribly painful.”

“That’s a very good answer.” You replied, feeling that a great weight had been lifted off your chest.

He held you in a gentle caress, tracing your brow bone and the curve of your lips and committing the feeling of you to memory.

This was real. This was real. This was real.

You both folded in on each other like paper houses laid to rest, until you were tangled up on the floor. There was a perfectly functional bed not even four feet away, but even that seemed like too much effort after everything that had happened.

Azriel wrapped his wings protectively around you, settling down with his head against your chest so he could hear your heartbeat. You hummed in tired contentment, peppering his forehead with kisses as your eyelids began to droop.

“I want to go home, Azriel,” You murmured, “I want to go home with you.”

Home.

Azriel swallowed thickly, “We’ll leave tomorrow first thing in the morning. I promise.”

You opened a bleary eye, examining your mate quietly, “Do you not want to say goodbye?”

Azriel kissed your chest, right over your heart. Thirty years ago he would have said yes. He would have taken time to get his affairs in order and to make sure Jadhan and his sons, Phaedra and Devra, and the rest were taken care of. But things had changed, and he knew that no matter what, they would be alright. They would live and travel and fall in love. If they were lucky, they’d experience the joy of dying in their sleep surrounded by loved ones at the end of a long and eventful road.

“No. No, I don’t think so.”

You pressed one final kiss to his forehead, absorbing him in the warmth of your arms. Azriel sighed, hanging onto the golden thread in his chest that wrapped around his soul and bound him to you.

“They’ll be ok, my love.” You murmured.

And so will we. You whispered the promise down the bond, soft and gentle.

He closed his eyes, pressing the words I love you into your skin.

“I know.” He whispered to the night sky once your breathing had evened out, “I know.”

That night at the tavern felt like a dream - the kind that left you groggy and awestruck when you initially awoke, and then slipped away like water cupped in a child’s hands.

Everything seemed louder than before, even though the townspeople walked about in a contemplative daze. It was the forest. That’s what it was. It hummed more brightly. The blanket of power that had rested over the treetops for decades had lifted overnight.

No one spoke of the events aloud - they were too aware of the enormity of what they’d witnessed - but they all knew the truth.

The Shadowsinger had finally been called home.

___

“Quick!” Alzhar’s eldest son, Samu, called out to the twins. They hobbled over as quickly as their stout legs could carry them.

“Samu,” Niran whined, “I’m tired.”

“Papa said to be back by dark.” Rhaan reminded them all. The only trademark that separated him from his twin brother was the flash of blond through his ruddy brown hair. White-tailed deer they called him.

“I want dinner.”

“Me too.”

Samu looked over the hills where the sun was sliding down the sky like rain on a window.

“But we haven’t found the house yet!” He protested.

“We’ve been searching for days.”

“Yeah, we’ve been searching for days.” Niran parroted.

“Of course we have!” He threw his hands up in the air, “Did you really think the Shadowhouse would be easy to find?” He clicked his tongue in disappointment, shaking his head, “Go back if you’re so scared. I’ll look for it myself.”

Niran and Rhaan looked at each other, identical frowns pulling at their lips. They wanted to prove their worth, but they were still younger than Samu, and their hunger mattered more.

“We’re telling Mama you didn’t listen.”

“I want your dessert.”

“Wait, no. I want it. Can we share?”

“I’m not sharing!”

Samu smiled triumphantly and stomped further into the woods, leaving the twins to their usual bickering.

The little boy sprinted back home hours later, a gleeful kick in his step. The sky was already turned pitch black, but the Mother had sprinkled out the stars like salt to guide him home.

Devra stood in the doorway with her hands on her hips, swollen belly blocking out the roaring firelight like an eclipse.

“Where have you been?” She gasped out, grabbing Samu’s head and holding him close to her stomach. Samu loved when she did this, convinced that his newest sibling would talk to him first.

Niran and Rhaan wanted another brother to tussle with, but Samu was hoping for a sister. She could tussle with them too, he was sure.

He ignored her question, grabbing her hand and hauling her back inside, “Papa! BaBa! I found it! I found the Shadowhouse.”

Niran and Rhaan popped out from their bedroom, clambering after their older brother as he dragged their mother along.

Jadhan and Alzhar looked up with relief. Jadhan’s hair had turned white as snow in his old age and hints of gray were beginning to sprout from Alzhar’s temples.

“Papa!”

“Samu, what have we told you about staying out past-”

“The Shadowsinger left something for you and Baba.”

“What?!” Jadhan sat up straighter, grimacing at the painful twist of his leg. He motioned his grandson closer, helping him climb onto the bed.

The little boy dropped the blue-velvet bag into his outstretched hands, leaning back on his heels with rapt attention. Samu, being the boy that he was, hadn’t opened it on the whole journey over and was now buzzing to learn what secrets it held within.

Jadhan was immediately startled by the weight of the parcel.

“Open it!”

“Wait! I want to see!”

“Help me up!”

Alzhar and Devra relented, picking up the twins and leaning close. Their own curiosity was itching to be satisfied.

Jadhan opened the bag and tipped it over spilling dozens of gold coins onto the quilt. Devra gasped, her hands flying up to her mouth. Alzhar didn’t bother hiding his shock, his mouth agape.

It was more money than they’d ever seen in their lives, Jadhan didn’t concern himself with it - he hadn’t had to worry about money in a long while. Instead, he picked up the slip of paper that had also fallen out, carefully unfolding it with trembling, wrinkled fingers.

For all the drinks “on the house” and for your son, Mikhail, who traveled to the edges of the Continent and made it possible for my mate to find me and bring me home.

Scrawled on the lower edge of the paper were more words, cramped and small like they’d been jotted down as an after-thought.

Also, your whiskey is absolutely disgusting. Never let anyone else drink it.

Everyone stilled, watching Jadhan carefully.

Without warning, the old man tipped his head back and roared with laughter.

Samu leaned back in surprise. His grandfather was a naturally solemn man, and he'd never heard him laugh so loudly and so fiercely.

Alzhar reached for the slip of paper, skimming the words quickly.

"No!" He cried out in disbelief, "Stop! This can't be. Devra, look-"

One by one the adults fell into fits of roaring laughter, collapsing onto Jadhan's bed or onto the floor. Even the boys cheered - confused but happy to be part of whatever story had just finished unfolding.

Jadhan was seventy-one years old when he died, and he died laughing, surrounded by his family at the end of a long road.

Down the street in the tavern, the band was still playing the same old songs, although they were being performed by yet another generation of songbirds. But, there was one new addition to the repertoire.

A song penned by Phaedra and aptly named The Ballad of the Shadowsinger years before her quiet passing.

It was always the last song of the night. Always. And it ended like this:

Come Solstice day

Come wind or rain

Now calls the heather

The Midlands will have no reason to dismay

For the Shadowsinger has been called home again

___________

Another author's note:

I feel like I threw in so many new human characters so I made a family tree. Ha!

Also, please enjoy the small essay I wrote last night after writing this oneshot...

From last night:

Listen, some red flags are just pale orange scraps of fabric when you’re an immortal non-human being who’s been alive for hundreds of years. Don’t come for me. I’m so tired. It’s 3am. I should sleep.

Ok, note from Florence B at 3:16am because I am making CONNECTIONS. Not all of this was intentional, but maybe it was? Maybe I’m just stringing connections after the fact. Maybe I’m a genius. Probably not, but still. I’m so tired, guys. Why am I doing this right now? I should be sleeping but I can’t sleep so I’m going to do this instead.

Buckle down folks for the essay I am about to write:

I have my qualms about the ACOTAR books, as I’m sure most people do. Don’t get me wrong, they’re wonderful reads and it’s the series that got me back into reading after college, but they’re not perfect by any means.

One thing I think that gets brushed under the rug (especially given how ALL the batboys fall for girls who are literally in their late teens/mid-twenties - it’s a major red flag but we forgive because it’s fiction) is how DIFFERENTLY fae experience time. LIke, these fuckers live hundreds, if not THOUSANDS of years. The only way they die is if they get killed, like purposely poisoned or stabbed or whatever have you. I tried to write this/touch upon this when Azriel describes how he’s jealous of Jadhan for his humanity and how no matter what, Azriel is stuck potentially living an ETERNITY with the reality of what he’s done. It’s why for me - personally - all the stuff about the mate bond driving males mad or the choice that Rhysand and Feyre make to bind their lives to one another kind of makes sense. Like, if I was faced with an eternal life sentence in a world that was as brutal and cruel as the ACOTAR universe is, HECK YEAH I MIGHT BIND MY LIFE TO SOMETHING/SOMEONE I CARED ABOUT! I’M NOT DOING THIS SHIT ALONE! You’ve gotta retire from the game at SOME point.

I know I probably made things really confusing by introducing a whole host of human characters spanning several generations (re: the family tree up above), but as I previously mentioned, I thought it was important to do this to contextualize/compare the lifespan of a fae to a normal human. While Jadhan is growing up, getting a job, getting married, having kids, Azriel is still struggling with his banishment to the Midlands and his own sense of self-worth. The line about Jadhan approaching Azriel and offering him money to kill his abusive father who broke his leg was thrown in there later on around the 1am mark. And I didn’t think of it much - I just wanted a reason for Azriel to know Jadhan personally throughout his life from childhood to old age. BUT! Now that I think I’m thinking about it more, it makes sense that Azriel would be able to accept Y/n’s forgiveness so quickly. He sees a lot of himself in young Jadhan and by helping him escape his abusive father(albeit by violent means) and watching him grow up into a strong man and a good father, Azriel’s helping heal his own inner child.

The kids! Oh my goodness I love the kids so much. Once I threw the first kid into the story I thought - fuck it, we’re going to make the parallelism painfully obvious with Azriel seeing himself, Rhys, and Cassian mirrored in Mikhail, Alzhar, and Zhik. Then of course I had to bring things around full circle and give Alzhar three boys and a girl on the way (yes, Devra is pregnant with a girl and Samu is going to shower her with all the love that Rhys gave his own sister).

Finally, I’m going to address any comments about Y/n forgiving Azriel too quickly. 1) I feel like it is a universally acknowledged/unacknowledged truth that no one hates Azriel as much as he hates himself. And no punishment could ever be worse than the self-loathing he feels for himself (NOTE: people, if a partner/romantic love interest/friend/crush/whatever EVER says this kind of stuff to you, drop them like a two-ton boulder. That’s a major red flag, but once again this is a fictional man/fae so we can let it slide). 2) Once again, these fae are literally HUNDREDS OF YEARS OLD. I can only speak for myself when I say this, but I feel like if I had known and loved someone for that long, I would be willing to forgive a lot and trust that time might be able to heal deeper wounds than humans are used to. Time is precious to us humans, we can’t always afford to wait and hope for things to get better on their own, but fae can.

Are those all my thoughts? I think those are all my thoughts. It’s 3:47am now. Oh jeez. To future me: I’m so sorry if you have to read this and it’s bad and you have a coffee-fueled headache all day because I fucked things up for us.

#azriel x reader #azriel x y/n #azriel x you #azriel x mate reader #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acotar #azriel angst #azriel x reader angst #ANNNNGGGSSSTTTT #angst #angst with a happy ending

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nohoperadio · 4 months

Text

Imagine one day you listen to a song you've loved all your life, but this time one line from it strikes your ear a little strangely. You look up the lyrics for the first time, and sure enough, where you thought the singer was saying "girl" they were actually singing "gull", and it turns out the song is about seabirds, not women at all. Huh! You mention this to your friend, but your friend just looks at you kind of blankly and confused, like they're trying to figure out what weird joke you're trying to make. You try to explain but their responses just keep not making sense to you and it's kind of weirding you out.

Eventually you do some more digging online and the notion that's been slowly creeping into view is all of a sudden undeniable: it's not clear how you managed to get everything so terribly wrong, but it turns out every time you've ever heard the word girl in any song it was actually gull, and the whole project of 20th century popular song is much more seagull-centric in theme than you could possibly have imagined. The causes and ramifications of this fact you still need to investigate.

On such a day as this you would be shaken to your foundations, but I believe too you would have the courage to be exhilarated. You would be as reborn and the world as given to you entirely anew; all your old understanding of how things are would be held in abeyance for the moment, and you would be free to begin the project of existence on a fresh footing, this time entirely awake.

And I don't know what form it will take, but I know that you, I'm talking to you, will have this experience, exactly as I describe it but with all of the details changed. You have kept your soul open as well as you could, even when it hurt to, and this will be your reward. It may be five years from now, it may be tonight, it may be fifty years. But I know and you know it will come.

#uninteresting

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stars-and-the-min · 4 months

Text

☆ the wrong way to hard launch (14) | OP81

summary : oscar's girlfriend is a walking pr problem for literally everyone (including herself) social media au

pairing : oscar piastri x zhou!fem!singer!oc

a/n wait wait let him cook (imola)

masterlist | last part | part 14 | next part

INSTAGRAM

oscar piastri just posted to their story

TIKTOK

comments

FOLLOW UP QUESTION, WHICH RACE ????

something about a formula 1 driver and a rockstar having like the most normal story of meeting is hilarious

"took me a while to actually start dating her" i'm deadddd, u pulled her in the end tho bro

best relationship on the grid, i would die for them

didn't win the race but won her number, u have ur priorities straight

y'all gas her up too much it's not like she's that big a deal 💀 ↳ she's at least ten times more famous let's be fr for a sec, most of the world doesn't know what f1 is but they've probably heard one of lina's songs on the radio

r/EmptyBottles · Posted by u/luckyluna9364 1 mo. ago Lina x Oscar Timeline [read new comments]

fantstic013 · 12 hr. ago reviving this post bc of oscar's tiktok; they met at a race, which race??? when did lina attend a race?? whatthekermitdid · 11 hr. ago her f1 race debut (her words, not mine) was literally suzuka last month so i'm just as confused niaphilia283 · 11 hr. ago she might have done it behind the public's back. i think we all know that lina is only seen when she wants to be seen; we basically only saw her at scheduled events for the entirety of 2020-2023 like where was she even? what was she doing?

luckyluna9364 OP · 3 hr. ago ppl out there scrambling wondering which race but it has to at least be from the 2023 season bc i bet my whole life savings that their talking period was like 3 months so the new proposed meeting is like... abu dhabi grand prix (at the very least) which was back in december 2023

TWITTER

emme @flowersforcami · 4h still not over last night's show... the shit was phenomenal, it the cherry on top ↳ amie <3 @mieflrs · 4h i don't think we acknowledge how masochistic t*mmy must be to follow lina around europe and enduring those 2 hour shows where almost every song is the biggest middle finger to your existance; personally, if a song like aconite was written about me, i'd just never show my face again

kayla @luna_apocolypse · 5h oscar's story??? sir are you talking about the actual view or the stunning woman on the balcony?? it's important that i know

president linami @ linaminami · 6h 24 days since lina's posted on any of her socials... i can't believe i miss her unserious ass so much 🥲

oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 33m "oscar could do so much better" respectfully how do you get better than selina fucking bui? ↳ oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 33m "he should be with someone like him" she's australian, she's born in 2001, she's got cat energy, she loves sleeping and chocolate, she's slightly unhinged, she's known as a prodigy in her field, she keeps down low and most importantly, she's hot as shit, what more do you want

piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h he called her his lucky charm 🥺 i love them so much 😭 ↳ lila💚 @kasdanrights · 2h wait lina?? where's this from?? i have terrible signal and no videos are loading ↳ piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h it's from a video of them entering the paddock, someone asked him what's its like to have her at a race again and he grinned and said she's his lucky charm ↳ lila💚 @kasdanrights · 2h WAIT NO THEY'RE SO CUTE I CAN'T

MESSAGES

from the phone of oscar piastri

TWITTER

oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 4h WE'RE SO BACKKKKK

↳ piaa⁸¹ @papayaeightyone · 4h that lucky charm must be working 👀

pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 34m OSCAR PIASTRI P2 START YES YES YES

oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 21m oh he was not kidding when he said she was his lucky charm ↳ oscalina real ?! @emptyginbottles · 20m i'll have whatever he's having bc he was like a cat on steroids

jess @OPIXSTRI · 28m we were so close to a maiden pole why is it always a fucking haas ruining everything

Jonny @EB_jonno · 32m @ OscarPiastri Mega quali mate, way to absolutely send it (don't give Lina too much credit)

INSTAGRAM

oscarpiastri Autodromo Enzo e Dino Ferrari di Imola

liked by cameliazzz and 218,496 others

oscarpiastri Well, it was fun while it lasted 😂

opeightyone Time to have better fun tomorrow then

cameliazzz i bet she found it hilarious ↳ oscarpiastri @ cameliazzz She found the timing hilarious, she was pretty upset it happened

TWITTER

pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 3h oscar piastri is now incredibly familiar with the rear wing of that ferrari it's just a shame it's the hideous hp logo

oscalina real ?! @ emptyginbottles · 3h LANDO??? LANDO OML U ARE SCARING THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE

piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h i mourn the mclaren double podium we could've had... ↳ piaa⁸¹ @ papayaeightyone · 2h what matters most is that oscar finished ahead of sainz, i'm a happy woman

ZG24 future WDC · @zhoupdates · 21m the most iconic cousins are having dinner together in imola after the race

tagged: 周冠宇 | Zhou Guanyu 🇨🇳 and lina !!! ↳ clara @ zgy24 · 5m oscar finally let lina out of his sight this weekend?

INSTAGRAM

oscarpiastri

liked by logansargeant and 264,586 others

oscarpiastri En route to Florence (got really sidetracked)

amelia_belrose who gave them the right to be so cute?

pi4str1 the anticipated road trip happened 🥺 ↳ linasgirl4 @pi4str1 from a mention in a rolling stones interview to reality, they did it guys 🫶

opeightyone Nice quick break before the double header

siera_mblanc he's never looked so boyfriend before this is insane, the girlfriend effect is slowly kicking in

TWITTER

pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 2h something real funny about oscar driving down to florence with lina to spend a day or two before having to helicopter over to monaco by wednesday for the mclaren senna tribute livery/monaco gp promotions like 😭 OSCAR, BREATHE A LITTLE ↳ pookie piastri @op81ln4 · 2h idk how u think this is lina hate, it's just me pointing out that oscar had found a gap in his schedule and immediately went: i'm spending as much time as physically possible with my girlfriend before they forcibly drag me to monaco

Oscar Piastri @ OscarPiastri · 4h Searching my family tree to find any trace of Monégasque roots ↳ Charles Leclerc @Charles_Leclerc · 1h I can adopt you if needed ↳ Jonny @EB_Jonny · 13m did we just become in-laws to the leclercs???

piaa⁸¹ @papayaeightyone · 1h oscar piastri-leclerc 😭

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

taglist @ririyulife @ashy-kit @fionaschicken @namgification @cherry-piee @urfavsgf @eiaaasamantha @sp1rl @destinyg237 @iloveyou3000morgan

#f1 #oscar piastri #oscar piastri x oc #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri fanfic #oscar piastri imagine #oscar piastri smau #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 smau #f1 fic #f1 smau #f1 imagine #f1 social media au

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infamous-if · 1 year

Note

There's been some discussion recently about MC that caught my attention because I agree. MC feels like a loser when you think about all of the other characters. When I play an MC who did nothing wrong to Seven it just feels like Seven is angry for no reason. Seven is allowed to act like a child while MC has to take it? Doesn't seem fair.

Everyone has something going for them and what about MC? No one likes them and everyone hates their guts. Aren't they supposed to be the main character? Why does everyone hate them? Why aren't they considered more talented? It just feels like MC is a doormat while Seven and the other ROs are these talented superstars.

I don't want this to come off any way but I feel like the story would be stronger if you made MC a bit meaner or at least made people acknowledge MC as a better singer.

I don't want to sound rude but I'm very much exhausted by this topic. I've probably explained this 5+ times but I'll try to break it down one last time just so people can understand what I'm trying to do.

First, to get it out of the way, we are only on Chapter 2. I just want to reiterate that. The story just started.

It just feels like MC is a doormat while Seven and the other ROs are these talented superstars.

Secondly, MC is a character I try to give as much customization to, both personality and appearance wise. There's a variety of ways you can approach everything, or I at least try to in a way that doesn't sacrifice what I want to write for the plot, but I think people are under the impression MC is 100% a blank slate character when it's not true.

MC is still dependent on the plot and I always strived for MC to have their own narrative arc. The same way the ROs have their own character arcs, MC will have their own, because they are a character in their own right and going through some that fundamentally changes their life. That means the MC from Chapter 1 will not be the MC at Chapter 20. They will be different. That's what a character arc is. Character development is expected. How can you expect a slew of ROs to grow and change and MC remaining stagnant? Doesn't make sense narratively and it seems unfair to MC.

The MC is not a completely blank slate, and that's where people are getting it confused. In the beginning, MC is going through such a change with BOTB, without their family, and on the heels of a band breakup that's still impacting them today. MC is a little down, maybe even depressed if that's how you read it, and they're getting pushed to be leader by their manager. They are not really okay right now. They have to be professional and put on a brave face for the sake of their band, who, if you paid attention to what Rowan said in Chapter 2, are all depending on this. This is what they worked for since high school. MC is not going to flip a damn table on Day 1 just because you want them to. MC can fight, if you choose, against UWB. That's not supposed to be a smart choice, but emotions get the best of all of us.

They are only just navigating a worldwide globally famous show with a cheating allegation hanging over their heads, and a manager who wants them to be leader when, up until now, they haven't been. They've just been friends making music and miraculously having a fanbase. Now they're really in it. They have been thrust head first into the industry in a way that is so big that MC has to go from singer playing with their friends to a leader of a band who may just become globally famous in a few months if they play their cards right.

A lot of their actions are influenced by the fact that their band almost broke up and it's a thing that hangs over their head. Their past influences them. That's...how people work.

Now, if we're at Chapter 20 and MC is still acting like a scared bunny who doesn't know what they're doing, then be my guest. Scream in my inbox, I'd understand. That would be terrible writing, but we're not. The tour just started.

I play an MC who did nothing wrong to Seven it just feels like Seven is angry for no reason. Seven is allowed to act like a child while MC has to take it? Doesn't seem fair.

MC doesn't have to take it lol. I've always given an option to be rude to Seven/try to put them in their place.

People think I favor Seven when that's not true. (Seven isn't even my favorite RO)(That title goes to August lol). Seven acts the way they act because they are not in a healthy headspace. Their actions are not meant to be understood, because they are not entirely justified. Seven has a lot of growing up to do, but I have never sat here and advertised Seven's emotions as correct. Everyone knows Seven is childish, everyone knows Seven is handling everything terribly. People in the story have mentioned it. Their abandonment issues GREATLY influence their characterization and actions. MC has abandonment issues as well, of course, but MC is not as emotionally unstable as Seven. That's canon. It is what it is. Seven has a whole subplot about it.

As do other ROs. The only difference is that they're not so open about their struggles. Seven just doesn't care. Their emotions guide them. They can't control it. That's who they are. I have also said that many times.

I don't know why you think Seven can get away with everything when 1) it's only been 2 chapters and 2) no one knows how anyone feels about Sev because it's in MC's POV. Seven goes through their own trial by fire. As every RO does......thats a narrative arc.

Seven was always going to be a plot point, whether they were an RO or not. They were always going to be MC's former best friend.

This one bothers me the most, mostly because I don't know where this came from. "No one likes them" Jenna and The Jewels does. Slow Crawl does. Their fans do. We haven't even properly met the other bands. Of course there will be bands who don't like MC: they're competitors. They're not friends. They don't know MC, why would they be biased towards them? Because they're the main character? They don't care about that?? It's how fiction works.

Maya is following the band around because of how much she admires MC.

Orion quit his job because MC's singing inspired him that much.

G listened to MC and saw something in them. Literally calls them the 'Chosen One'

Fans of the old band preferred MC over Seven. They liked the songs where MC sang solo. MC was better for their future over Seven. Hence why it was Seven getting demoted, not MC. I've said this. It's in the story.

I don't see how being the lead singer of a band on a global show at 26 makes anyone an actual loser but I digress.

Literally in Part 2 MC is acknowledged so maybe it'd be better if we waited? Say a good few chapters...?

If you wanted a story where MC is Queen level famous right out the gate and the #1 draft pick for BOTB and has no problems and better than everyone, then I'd advise you to look elsewhere. I don't like that. I like giving MC obstacles because conflict creates story. I like MC having to fight for their spot. It's more realistic, and this has never been a story of fame. It's been a story of their journey to fame.

That's their narrative arc. They grow into it.

You are allowed to hate/dislike Seven. I encourage it. I have given MC the option to hate Seven, because I'm aware that what Seven is doing is unfair. I am not punishing you for hating Seven. And this goes for all the ROs. It does not bother me if you dislike my characters. It means I haven't made them squeaky clean and have made them realistic enough to have people both dislike and like them, much like real life. I get it.

I've always advertised Infamous as a messy, angsty and dramatic story. I've used the term 'melodrama' for it often. I've always said the ROs--especially Seven--are flawed. Some more than others. I've said, verbatim, they are not wholly good people. I don't know why people act so shocked when they act some type of way. Like...I've always stayed true to what the story is. Half the dynamics aren't healthy right now...but that's the 'growing up part' of the story we haven't even gotten to yet?

If that doesn't interest you, then that's perfectly okay! If you don't like the narrative arc I have planned for MC, that's fine too! It just becomes a bit disheartening when people ignore the narrative.

I will try harder to write in a way that specifies my intentions. I always believe that if more than a handful of readers have the same complaint, then it's on the writer to fix it.

I hope my tone didn't come off rude, I'm just really really tired of this. I've had to deal with this since even before the demo dropped :) but your critiques are valid and everyone is always free to express themselves however they want. <3

#inbox #'MC is a loser' convo will always follow me I guess #MC will win a grammy and someone will be like: “they're kinda...loserish though? imagine winning a grammy at 30 and not 20 lol”#/j #ill add this to the faq and never talk about it again

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icanseethefuture333 · 1 year

Text

Singer: persona chart 🎤

Do you want to be a singer? Here's what your Singer persona chart means 🖤! Go to astro.com and click on the extended chart option. Scroll to the bottom and type in 10698 to find the Singer asteroid. Then select which chart type and pick "persona chart".

The Singer asteroid is your overall voice and sound as an artist.

The ascendant is your public image as a singer or your musical concept. What people will know you for.

Your sun sign is your identity as a singer.

The moon is how you express your feelings and emotions while singing.

Mercury is the thought process of your song writing and what your lyrics are about. It also is how you communicate to people in interviews, radio stations, or talk to other celebrities.

Mars is how active you are physically while performing and your stamina. As well as your temperant when faced with conflict or your passion for singing.

Venus is your beauty and style. What makes you stand out visually or how your music videos could look like. It could also represent what record label you sign a contract with and what kind of people you work beside.

Jupiter is where you can find your success as a singer and what would help you attract the most abundance. What would make you famous.

Saturn is what humbles you as a singer and what scandals/rumors you could possibly get involved in.

Uranus is your connection to the world and how you interact with your fanbase. Also how to promote your music with technology.

Neptune is what people don't see behind the scenes or what could happen to you that others might not know about.

Chiron is the wounds and hardships of being a singer.

North node is your life path as a singer and what destiny you have to fulfill. The longevity of your career as a singer.

Midheaven is your social status and professionalism as a singer.

Use the degree theory to see what energy is associated with your signs/planets. Here are some indications of fame degrees in a chart.

Aries singers are expressive with their identity. They are often fresh on the scene and have a lot to prove to the world. Their attitude can be described as spunky and charming. They sing from their head and chest more than their diaphragm, could have trouble projecting their voice properly. These singers are competitive or could make their debut performance in a singing competition.

Taurus singers are more reserved and sensual. Their voices can sound velvety and seductive. Their best songs are recorded at the privacy of their home. They could sing in intimate places like singing in a jazz bar or a coffee shops, something like the Tiny Desk series. They could perform in green, earthy sceneries. Their music makes people feel soothed and comfortable.

Gemini singers have a duality and are able to switch up their concepts. Their voices could have multiple layers or tones to them. They could have a high pitched voice or low pitched voice. For example, when some people talk their voice is deep but when they sing its really high and vice versa. Gemini singers perform at radio stations or live on social media.

Cancer singers carry a lot of emotion in their voice. It could almost sound like they're crying or choking up. They are best at conveying their feelings through a song. Their notes have a lot of resonance. They are shy and don't like being put on the spot when singing. These singers have terrible stage fright. They are the least likely to perform in front of other people. They could like to sing at the beach.

Leo singers are bold and charismatic. They like to be very theatrical on stage and enjoy giving a great performance. Their voices are loud on it's own and they could even perform without a microphone if asked to. They are perfectionists and they hate when things get messed up on stage. Their image is important to them. Beyoncé has a Leo ascendant in her singer persona chart and she's known for her diva presence ("Somebody's gettin' fired!"). Leo singers perform in big stadiums, theaters, or musical plays. They could also be actresses.

Virgo singers could get criticized a lot on social media. Some people enjoy their voices, others do not. They can be hard on themselves and practice until they can't sing anymore. Their voices could sound very thin, but they have great enunciation skills. They could experience a cold often or they have to take care of their throat more than the other Singer signs. Singer songwriters are most likely to be Virgos. They could perform in hospitals or at senior citizens centers.

Libra singers are flirtatious and popular for their beauty. Their voices are attractice and have a great singing technique. People could view them as the total package. Libra singers could have to heavily rely on endorsements and commercials than their music. They have to balance music with work. They could have a fanbase that's mostly men or women depending on their gender/sexuality. Their music mostly consist around romantic relationships and they could perform at churches, weddings, or venues.

Scorpio singers are like sirens. Their voice echoes through a room and have a hypnotic effect on people. It's hauntingly beautiful. Their music could have much darker elements or Scorpio singers could make music that expresses their grief or new chapters in their life. People who listen to Scorpio singers could play their music when they are experiencing a transformation in life. Perhaps during a break up or the death of a loved one. Scorpio singers are most likely the ones to perform at a funeral.

Sagittarius singers are free spirited and their music is very optimistic. Their music makes people have a different perspective on life and appreciate the little things in life. They are very wise. They could like to do voice breaks while singing. Sagittarius could perform in public areas and where tourists visit to do busking. They are very active on stage and move around a lot.

Capricorn singers are serious and elegant. They could sing on very deep topics. Their music could make people question themselves and if they are learning from the lessons the universe is trying to teach them. They could also talk about money and success in their music. They use a lot of vibrato and have husky voices. They perform in class or auditions, anywhere they can show off their skills.

Aquarius singers are nonchalant and chill. They like to be "cool" and do something different than the other mainstream artists are doing. Their voices could have a unique tone or sound nasally. Robotic or alien-like. Their music is very avant garde or experimental. People could want to gatekeep their music. They could perform online by posting covers on tiktok/youtube or do virtual tours.

Pisces singers have ethereal or angelic voices. They are gentle and soft. Their music sounds dreamy and ambient. They could perform in auditoriums or when it's raining. People could feel their music has caused them to have a spiritual awakening or are being healed as they listen to their music.

1st house stellium in the persona chart could mean that you get discovered quite fast for your singing or you could look like an idol.

2nd house stellium in the persona chart means you could make a lot of money from singing professionally. You could receive a lot of offers that will give you financial security in the music industry. If there is negative aspects this could mean someone could rip them off or steal a lot of money from them.

3rd house stellium in the persona chart is people could make someone be well known in their hometown for being a singer or be the talk/star of the town. They could make a lot of connections in the music industry. Their family member could work with them or helped them get started in their career.

4th house stellium in the persona chart people have their parents, specifically moms, as their managers. They could come from a family of musicians as well. These singers are mostly likely to be nepo babies. They could have possibly chaotic relationships with their families if negatively aspected.

5th house stellium in the persona chart people could be popular with kids or will be remembered as their childhood idol. They are well known for being creative and artistic. If negatively aspected, parents could not want their children listening to their music, they could see them as a bad influence.

6th house stellium in the persona chart means that being a singer would become a daily routine for you. You could have to practice frequently or be in the studio a lot to record. It could impact your health if you are overworked.

7th house stellium in the persona chart could mean the legal matters of your contract. What partnerships you make as a singer and possibly dating/marrying someone in the music industry. If negatively aspected, this means that your company is unfair or your partner will betray you somehow.

8th house stellium in the persona chart could mean your career as a singer will have a lot of transformations and changes. Being a musician for you could mean there will be a lack of stability emotionally. A lot of ups and downs. It could also mean you will be remembered for your legacy when you die. If negatively aspected, these people could get involved with scandals or meet people from cults.

9th house stellium in the persona chart people could be more popular overseas than in their own home country. They could travel to a different country to be a singer or they will travel a lot to perform. Their world tours will be the most successful. If negatively aspected, these people could get banned from entering certain countries.

10th house stellium in the persona chart people will have long term success in their musical career. Their fathers could be their managers or their fathers were famous musicians. If negatively aspected, they could have a strict company or contract that forces them to continue to be a singer even if they wanted to quit.

11th house stellium in the persona chart people could of had their friends push them to be a singer or they work with their friends. Singers with a 11th house stellium most likely are in bands or groups. They are popular on social media. If negatively aspected they could get kicked out of bands/groups or get a lot of hate on the internet.

12th house stellium in the persona chart are meant to fulfill their life purpose as a singer. They are supposed to help heal the world and transcend the energetic collective's minds. If negatively aspected these singers could make sacrifices that are damaging to their mental health or get involved with substance abuse.

#singer asteroid #astrology #astro observations #astrology observations #astro notes #asteroid 10698 #asteroids #music #idol #kpop #pop culture

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solaireverie · 1 year

Text

sv5 | stars all aligned and they intertwined

pairing: sebastian vettel x f!singer!reader

summary: [ social media au ] despite parting ways years ago, you and sebastian somehow find each other again (or: sebastian becomes your wag after his retirement)

warnings: language

faceclaim: anne hathaway + pinterest

author's note: seb is literally the definition of a wife guy. i love him so much. enjoy!

liked by phoebebridgers, oceanblvd, sebastianvettel and 3,459,127 others

yourusername the biggest thank you to everyone who came last night. i adore adore adore all of you with my whole entire heart ❤️

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user MOTHERRRRR I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR THE BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE!!!!!!

↪ yourusername i'm so glad you enjoyed it 🥰

↪ user holy shit y/n l/n replied to me i can die happy now 😵‍💫

user the finger in the first pic??? y/n girl are you trying to tell us something 🤨

↪ user i don't get it? does it mean anything special?

↪ user it's one of the most famous celebrations of ex-formula 1 driver sebastian vettel. they dated a while ago and he was at her concert last night!!!!

↪ user awww that's cute 🥺

sebastianvettel Always lovely to see you again 😄

↪ yourusername likewise 💕

liked by sebastianvettel, gigihadid, charles_leclerc and 874,935 others

tagged: sebastianvettel

yourusername behind the scenes 🎥

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user new music soon??? 👀👀👀

↪ yourusername maybe 😉

charles_leclerc 🤍🤍🤍

↪ yourusername ❤️❤️❤️

user seb and charles in the likes 😳 ariana what are you doing here?

↪ user seb's also tagged lololololol the rumors are terrible and cruel but honey most of them are (probably) true ✨

sebastianvettel Mein engel ❤️ [ my angel ]

↪ yourusername mein weltmeister (und fotograf) 💕 [ my world champion (and photographer) ]

↪ user absolutely unwell over this interaction. what do you mean seb took the photos. why are they calling each other pet names in german. UNWELL.

↪ charles_leclerc trust me it's worse in person

liked by lewishamilton

↪ user charles?!?!?!??!?! lewis?!?!??!?!??! y/n's collecting all the fast car boys fr 😭

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, charles_leclerc and 481,359 others

tagged: yourusername

sebastianvettel These hands had to let it go free and this love came back to me

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yourusername this love is alive back from the dead ❤️

liked by sebastianvettel

user THEY'RE SO FREAKING CUTE?????????

user so happy for them 🥺 it was really obvious that they were in love and that it was just bad timing the first time around...

charles_leclerc mom & dad :)

↪ yourusername who taught him this??? charles darling i'm afraid i'm not quite at that age yet

↪ danielricciardo i claim the fifth

↪ yourusername you're not even american 😑

user the caption sounds a lot like a lyric 👀

liked by yourusername

liked by sebastianvettel, dyl.an, billboard and 7,936,872 others

tagged: sebastianvettel

yourusername I fell terribly in love with someone when I was in my mid-twenties, before either of us knew who we were. It was a love that people write tragedies about, a cautionary tale told to children for years to come, a car wreck you can’t look away from. In the end, I walked away from everything we’d built with tears in my eyes and walls around my heart.

I don’t regret the paths I chose and sacrifices I made. The starkest realizations I’ve had about myself came in the days after, when I cried myself to sleep and pretended I didn’t know his name. I created some of my most beautiful music when I couldn’t enter a room without seeing him in the crowd. I grew from the experience the way forests grow back after a wildfire.

However, I always regretted letting go of him. He was the one I knew I could always count on, the one who held me in my darkest days, the one whose smile I searched for wherever I went, despite knowing I was the one who erased it from my life.

Ten years later, after I had already buried everything we once shared, I received a text from an unknown number.

What came next is well-documented in pictures, notes scribbled on coffee cups, and train tickets across Europe. While we may have been the right person at the wrong time a decade ago, patience rewards those who wait.

I found myself falling for him all over again. It felt like a homecoming and a rebirth at the same time. We had changed and matured in our time apart, but we still knew each other like the backs of our hands. At his core, he is still the man I loved, and something in my soul knew that.

Love is a strange thing. It is something we feel deep in our beings yet something we will never fully understand. It is untameable, maddening, and fickle. It is also enchanting, captivating, and thrilling. If there’s someone in your life who loves you, count yourself lucky. If you love someone, I hope they appreciate you.

This album is both a love letter to him and for him. It is an ode to his figure against the sunrise and arms around my waist. It’s a time capsule of carnival games, elaborate bouquets, and endless late-night conversations. I treasure each and every second I get with you, especially the ones we spent writing some of the tracks together.

My love, adore adore adore is yours.

comments on this post have been limited

likes and reblogs are appreciated!

masterlist

for the nerds like me, here's a breakdown of y/n's music in this verse

#solwriting #f1 x reader #formula 1 x reader #formula one x reader #formula 1 #f1 #f1 fanfic #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 x you #f1 social media au #f1 imagine #f1 smau #sebastian vettel #sebastian vettel x reader #sebastian vettel x you #sebastian vettel imagine #sebastian vettel fanfic

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mydearlybeloathed · 7 months

Text

𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐏𝐈𝐄𝐂𝐄

𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 ♡

navigator!zoro and swordswoman!nami headcannons

𝐃𝐑𝐀𝐁𝐁𝐋𝐄𝐒 ♡

➥ all gender neutral

[zoro, romantic] "do not kiss me again"

[usopp, romantic] "i once told you i'd kissed a thousand women..."

[zoro, nami, platonic] "they're cheating, you know"

[nami, romantic] “kiss her you fool”

[zoro, romantic] “brazen”

[nami, platonic/romantic] “she’s my friend”

𝐌𝐔𝐋𝐓𝐈𝐏𝐋𝐄 ♡

moodswings

how zoro, sanji, and luffy deal with a pms-ing reader... f!reader

too sweet

nami, zoro x gn!reader

their mermaid lovers

mermaids and pirates should be sworn enemies by default... but you decide to spin that precedent on its head. various x mermaid!reader

big brothers, little sisters

aka an older sister fulfills her childhood wish for a big brother various x sister!reader

𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐈𝐂 𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐄𝐒 ♡

nothing yet...

𝐋𝐔𝐅𝐅𝐘 ♡

are you still sad?

luffy had always been more observant than you gave him credit for. f!reader, opla!luffy

i remember thinking i had you

you'd always had a feeling luffy's dreams would outgrow you, but when that day finally arrives, you're not as prepared as you'd thought you'd be. now he's willing to take a chance to make his dream come true, fully believing you're right behind him. you have a decision to make: risk everything for the boy who means everything, or set him free of your doubts. gn!reader, multi part fic, opla!luffy

you can talk to me, but you already know

a mission to recover your prized research from your greedy ex-employer goes awry when you, the crew's pacifist, decide to join the fight in the name of saving your beloved captain. when you awake from your near-mortal injuries, luffy demands to know why you put yourself in danger, and you're not sure you can answer him. gn!reader

𝐒𝐀𝐍𝐉𝐈 ♡

flavors of home

in which even though you've been rescued, you're homesick. a certain pirate chef is more than willing to help cure the ailment. f!reader

we are never getting back together (?)

in which you, now a successful singer, and sanji, now a pirate, reunite unexpectedly when you return to baratie for a one night only performance.f!reader

the one where you say no to the cat

your daughter really wants a cat, and you're adamant that the answer is no... until it starts to look like a yes.wife!reader

𝐙𝐎𝐑𝐎 ♡

get some sleep

you just can't get to sleep thanks to a terrible rainstorm terrorizing the ship. luckily, your tossing and turning inspired nami with an idea: just go sleep with the swordsman. f!reader

got me spinning like a ballerina

in which zoro doesn't dance, but he has no issue in watching you twirl yourself off your feet. so long as you twirl back to him when your feet get tired. f!reader

sail again

once upon a time, you'd weaseled your way into the demon pirate hunter's confidance, and maybe even his heart too. but one bounty gone wrong leads to you being left behind, and you just can't understand why. f!reader, apothecary!reader, multi part fic, opla!zoro

is she divine, is it the wine?

the grace of the sword and the stage come together as the strawhats' swordsman and dancer fall in love. zoro x fem!dancer!reader

quality time

you and zoro train together every morning, so it was only a matter of time till one of you got hurt (spoiler: it's not zoro) gn!artist!reader

once upon a dream

Long ago, you were cursed to one day sleep for an eternity—unless you’re presented with true love. You thought destiny couldn’t find you on the high seas, but when you're sorely mistaken, it's up to a certain swordsman to get his act together and rescue you from eternal sleep. sleeping beauty au, princess!reader

𝐔𝐒𝐎𝐏𝐏 ♡

coming soon...

𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈 ♡

im a quilt of all the ones I've loved

nami thinks theres so much of you wrapped up in all of her, that not even distance or time could change the way she feels. or in which three little bits of you now make up the patches of nami's person. f!reader

#nav .#divider by @cafekitsune

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pacifymebby · 1 year

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Hi! I was wondering if you can do a HC of the peaky blinders men having a lover who sings, like they sing so beautifully, and they like sing privately to the boys like love songs to them or a song they made up while slow dancing with them in a room (omfg that would be cute!) Thanks!! Hope your day goes well!! 💜

Aw this is so sweet <3

Warnings: nsfw in some places

Tommy

🌿He heard you singing before he heard you speaking. He was stood behind you in the queue at the bakery and you were singing to yourself under your breath.

🌿Even though you were only singing quietly he could already tell you were a good singer, that he'd like to hear you singing properly.

🌿 So he leant down and spoke quietly to you, "sing a little louder love, shame to waste such a pretty song by keeping it to yourself..."

🌿 Naturally you hushed up pretty sharpish, turning with a little gasp, a blush flourishing on your cheeks. You even apologised upon seeing who it was you'd disturbed with your little song...

🌿But he just chuckles and asks you again, "No I mean it, I you have a lovely voice, I'd like to hear a little more..."

🌿Then you're really blushing because this is Tommy Shelby you're talking to and he's asking you to sing for him in the middle of the bakery, and no one refuses him when he asks for something...

🌿 So you do, because you have to. You're trembling with nerves when you begin to sing a little louder, and you feel the eyes of other people in the shop watching you. You know that impromptu singing isn't exactly normal for a Thursday morning...

🌿 But its Tommys eyes on you that are doing the most damage. He's watching you so intensely.

🌿And when you finish your song, trailing off because your nerves have caught up to you and you feel ridiculous - which you tell him - he just takes your hands, tells you you're shaking, and then tells you again that your voice is beautiful.

🌿He pays for your shopping as a thank you and you expect never to see him again however that isnt the case and you seem to see him more often than ever. Its like he's searching you out...

🌿And he is... After hearing you sing for the first time he's obsessed with you, he thinks you've the most pure and angelic voice... It soothed him, calmed him when he needed to be brought back down to earth and he's determined to get close to you, have you all to himself.

🌿And naturally Tommy gets what he wants, he always does. He goes to the bakery at least once a day, always vague about why he's there, never lying about it because he isn't embarrassed or ashamed of that kind of thing. His determination has always been a strong point.

🌿 "In here a lot lately Tommy, and you don't have a sweet tooth in you..." "No, no you're right Sammy I don't... I'm just looking for someone, figure they do have a sweet tooth," shoots the baker boy a knowing half smile, like they're sharing an in joke, because he knows that being friendly with this lad will get him the information he wants.

🌿"Comes in first thing Saturday mornin and first thing Mondays too, sometimes shes in on a Wednesday for bread flour..."

🌿 So the next Saturday morning he's there bright and early and he finds himself in the queue behind you again, but today you know hes there and youre shy and embarassed remembering what happened last time... So you're not singing.

🌿And Tommys very dissapointed. "Quiet this morning little bird," he muses quietly, leaning down behind you, talking right beside your ear, making you jump and blush when you turn around startled by him. He enjoys seeing you startled and made shy by him, if he's being honest he really likes the sight of that, but he apoligises to you anyway, ever the gentlemen and he just like that he tells you he needs someone for a job, he needs a singer... See his little boy has these terrible nightmares since his mother died and well, he needs someone to come and sing to him at night, help him sleep.

🌿"The money'd be good I promise, don't sound like a real job I know but it'd pay like a real job... Better than a real job..."

🌿And how can you refuse when a man tells you his motherless little one isn't sleeping. So you don't even think about the money, completely taken in by Tommys little white lime. Because its Tommy who needs singing to, Tommy who's getting those horrid nightmares...

🌿You start visiting every couple of days, in the evenings for an hour or two, singing littlw Charlie to sleep whilst his father sits over his crib, stroking his hair. You realise that this must be a side to him Tommy doesnt let anyone else see. You start to see him as someone with vulnerabilities, with a tender side, capable of love. Something you've always been told Thomas Shelby is incapable of.

🌿And as time passes you start to realise that it isn't Charlie who struggles to sleep, that its Tommy. And so as time passes you start staying later, pretending you cant tell Charlie's settled, singing until Tommy has fallen asleep too. Sometimes you're there all night singing and then falling asleep ib your chair at the end of Charlies bed, because its too late to walk home alone.

🌿Things between you and Tommy took a long time to blossom but by the time they did you already felt like you knew him so well.

🌿Tommy is the one who brings your confidence out, always telling you how beautiful your voice is, how lovely it is to hear you sing. How you should be singing for people all the time. Before Tommy you didn't really sing for other people but now he's built you up to a place where you're not affraid to sing for others. In fact you often enjoy it.

🌿The night he kissed you for the first time it was late, Charlie had drifted to sleep and you were doing your usual, pretending not to have noticed, keeping up your singing until Tommy drifted off too.

🌿But Tommy had been watching you, tormented by these increasingly affectionate thoughts he'd been having whenever you were around. And he decided to do something that night.

🌿"y/n love, c'mere," he said, he looked sleepy and you were tired too, "Cmon come here, Charlies asleep and you look so lovely tonight, let me dance with you?"

🌿You were shocked but you were secretly thrilled because over the weeks you'd been visiting little Charlie you'd found yourself growing increasingly soft on Tommy. Perhaps it was that tender side you'd been seeing, that no one else saw, but he made you feel all kinds of happy whenever he was around. Everything felt sweeter, warmer, better.

🌿And although you were still shy when his serious eyes fixed on you and you felt him studying you, you had to admit that it thrilled you to be the center of his attention. And lately youd been wondering how it would feel to be held by him. To have him stroke your hair from your face. To have him look at you with that intensity, but from close up instead of from the otherside of the room.

🌿So you did as he asked and you crossed the bedroom floor to him. You gave him your hands and he held your fingers delicately. And when he stood up his hands moved to your waist, smoothing down the fabric of your dress gently, holding your hips.

🌿You didn't know what to do with your hands so he placed them for you, one on his shoulder, one palm flat against his chest.

🌿"Now," he said, "we need music..." he gave you a teasing, knowing smirk, "sing me something sweet angel, somet as sweet as you eh?"

🌿The tension was thick enough to cut with a knife but it was good tension. The atmosphere close and warm, the two of you gentle and sleepy and soft with one another. You felt so shy you has to close your eyes when you began to sing your favourite slow song, one which was really an old scottish lullaby but which could be danced to slowly too.

🌿"Good girl," Tommy lets out a little sigh, kissing your forehead, beginning to dance you slowly, rocking you. When his lips brush your cheek you open your eyes, look up at him like a doe in the headlights. You've thought about what it would be like to be kissed by him too but this is nothing like anything you could have ever imagined.

🌿Him telling you your songs beautiful as he leans in to kiss you on the lips, your mouths meeting and the two of you suddenly realising that this was something you should have done much much sooner.

🌿And when the kiss deepened and the two of you felt the moment heating up, the swell of need for him, and his for you, almost catching you both by surprise, he lifted you up off your feet and carried you to his bedroom.

🌿Now naturally, you'd stopped singing, your mouth a little occupied... However as he dips to kiss your neck, your collar bones and your chest, as he begins to undress you carefully, delicately, he asks you not to stop singing.

🌿"Keep singing angel," he murmurs to you between kisses, and he keeps repeating himself, even when youre undressing him, even when hes lifted you up off your feet and your legs are wrapped around him. Even as he slips into your for the first time, taking it slow and gentle, yoir voice shaking, your melody interrupted by your breath catching in your throat as he pushed into you slowly...

🌿He'll sing to you too sometimes and he has a far lovelier voice than you imagined he would. His voice is low and just a little rusty/misty sounding. It has that sweet woody tone to it. He'll sing to you when you're sad or scared.

Alfie

🐻 Alfie didn't know you could sing for a long time. It was something which, he'd always imagined you probably could do, because your low voice was always so sweet and resonant even when you spoke, but when he overhears you singing he has to say, he's surprised.

🐻And it niggles at him too, he's almost a little annoyed you've never sang to him, you don't even sing around him, not even in the evenings when he's got the wireless on.

🐻 He probably gets a bit grumpy about it as if he thinks youve been keeping your beautiful singing a secret from him on purpose.

🐻 But in reality you're just shy, and you don't think you do have a beautiful singing voice. You definitely don't think its beautiful enough to warrant singing for other people as if you believe yourself to be something special...

🐻 But Alfie stands just the otherside of the kitchen doorway listening to you sing as you kneed your bread dough. Thinks your voice is the most enchanting sound he's ever heard and he loves it.

🐻 Pretends not to like it, just to tease you, he comes into the kitchen behind you, grumbling and chuntering away. "Now whats all this racket then, whats all this... This noise bloody awful noise right keepin me awake..." but he can't keep his trick up for very long at all, not when you look mortified, wide eyes and imediately apologising over and over.

🐻He has to laugh, he can't believe you believe him for a start. But he feels guilty for teasing you and immediately opens his arms up to you, hugs you and kisses your cheek.

🐻"I'm only teasing zieskiet, obviously I'm only teasing you... As a matter of fact yeah, your little song you were singing just now, well, as a matter of fact my dear that was the most beautiful little song my fussy old ears, have ever been fuckin blessed to hear..."

🐻 Alfie thinks your voice is so inspiring, and he's a lover of music himself, a lover of the arts, he always tells you you should be singing on stages, in operas, for an audience with the knowledge, the cultured palette to appreciate you.

🐻You're his muse when he starts writing his opera, in fact your voice alone is half the reason he has for trying to write it in the first place. He wants to write an opera fittinf of youe glorious voice. But whenever he asks you to sing for him, whenever he asks you to inspire him, you just get shy and you try to hide away.

🐻And you always tease him to, reminding him, "I thought my singing was just a bloody great racket..." you'll refuse to sing for him just to watch him get grumpy and grumbly and then you'll giggle and sing for him running your fingers through his hair or his beards.

🐻 And you'll sing little love songs, tell him you wrote them for him and he'll get a little embarassed. "Don't know what you're wasting your time writing songs about me for zieskiet... Just an old man..." "My old man..."

🐻 He writes arias for you to sing and tries to get you to sing for other people but you won't do it. Your voice is something you trust only Alfie with, and he grows comfortable with that, begins to feel like he wouldn't want it any other way. Your voice is this precious secret that you share, something so precious you'll only give it to him.

🐻 Calls for you to come sit in his lap when its late and hes just come home from the office or that late night business that always sees him come home with blood on his hands. He sits himself down at the kitchen table or in his big armchair by the fire and he calls for you to come to him.

🐻 "Zieskiet my precious angel come sit down with your old man, it's been a fuckin godless day and he's tired..." and you go to him, let him pull you down into his lap, let him bundle you up in his arms, kiss you and growl into your neck. Running his hands over your waist, squeezing you possesively.

🐻 Holds your face in his hands and looks up at you, into your eyes with his own, which are so cold and steely for everyone but you. For you theyre molten, soft and dark and full of adoration.

🐻 "Sing me a song zieskiet, one with a sad little story right? One where the hero dies somet tragic yeah... Will you do that for your old man yeah, sing him a nice fuckin tragedy?"

🐻 Because he's a strange eccentric he will absolutely send Ollie or someone running half way across the city to find you having been told its an emergency, a serious fuckin emergency.

🐻 And when you get to the office Alfies just frowning, "Ah zieskiet, poppet thank the heavens you are here... Finally..." "What is it Alf, whats the matter?" "Ive tuned in and out of this bloody wireless yeah, and I've searched this whole bloody box of records yeah, ain't any fuckin music anywhere to be found..."

🐻 He really scared you half to death, had you running across the city with Ollie, just so you could sing him his favourite song.

Arthur

🍂 You've never really thought of yourself as particularly musically gifted and you don't really think your voice is anything special, however you love to sing and sing all the time. You adore music, you use it for emotional regulation, you hate to sit in silence. You hum when youre nervous, when you're happy, when you're sad you listen to sad songs and you sing along and pretend that your pain is just as bad as the pain of the man singing about his dead love.

🍂 And its something Arthurs always loved about you. How you're always singing, how you brighten a room with your good mood and your happy humming. How when things get tense and the kids need soothing and distracting, you're there to sooth them with a little song.

🍂 You teach Johns kids and Charlie and Ruby little songs, nursery rhymes, or songs to learn the alphabet and how to count. Songs to learn the days and the months. Arthur loves how you have a song for everything.

🍂 Its just something that makes you so different from everyone else in his life. You're so sweet and goodhearted and you're never too serious and your singing puts him at ease. He loves to listen to you and it always leaves him feeling warm and good inside when you sing.

🍂 When hes stressed out he'll ask you to sing for him and thats the only time you ever feel self concious, when he asks you to sing just for him and you can tell that hes depending on you for something. Then you question whether you're really good enough at singing... Because you know he'll actually be listening and expecting to hear something beautiful.

🍂 He likes to share a bath with you, share some wine, share some snow and then have you sing whilst you massage his shoulders. Loves when you wash his hair and sing for him, when you sing soft and low and sweetly in his ear, just for him. It makes him feel so safe and pure.

🍂 You sing to him to calm him when he's struggling to come down from one of those raging adrenaline rushes triggered by his PTSD. When hes having flashbacks you sing to him and hold his hand, kiss his temple. It helps to keep him grounded, helps him to stay on this plain in this reality instead of getting lost in a bad memory.

🍂You sing to him when youre cleaning his wounds, when youre washing other men's blood from his hands, scrubbing his nails and singing soothing little songs to calm him, to let him know you still love him, still think he deserves to be sung to. To be treated like a human.

🍂 He has favourite songs he'll ask for. And sometimes if youre singing and he doesn't feel like the kids are grateful enough that you sing to them he'll tell them to hush up and listen to you, "Dont know how lucky you are gettin to hear your aunty y/n sing for you like that, other kids would kill to have someone so beautiful singin to them!"

🍂Actually can get grumpy if he doesn't think other people appreciate your singing enough.

John

🌼 Is such a git and teases you relentless about your singing because you sing to yourself all the time.

🌼 "eh up that crazy lass from Watery Lanes singin to herself again, what a looney..." he's only joking but he doesn't know when a jokes stopped being funny, or that hes taking the joke too far.

🌼 Doesn't realise you think he's being serious or at least means it a little bit when he says its embarassing the way you wander round singing to yourself all the time, "whole of Birminghams gonna think you're losing the plot flower, gonna think you've gone nuts..."

🌼 So after awhile his jokes get to you and you take his thoughtless teasing to heart. You stop singing, or you try anyway. Its an old habbit and it dies hard and slow, so slow that John doesn't notice how you're singing less and less, or how sometimes you'll be singing to yourself but you'll stop just as he walks into a room.

🌼 Basically he's oblivious to the damage hes done until its too late and you really have stopped singing completely. Now you don't even really sing to yourself and its his fault...

🌼 Then one day he realises how quiet it is, how quiet you are and he gets upset, suddenly really worried for you.

🌼 "Y/N lass whats going on eh? You're upset or somets happened? Am not stupid I can tell..." but he is stupid, hes a stupid fuckin dinlow because even now he doesnt realise whats really the matter. When you tell him nothing is wrong, that everythings fine he argues back and says

🌼 "No, nah somethings not right flower, you don't sing anymore or anything, you're so quiet..."

🌼 You look at him, a little bit confused, a little bit wounded. "Thought you didn't like my singin...why do you care if I don't sing anymore?" you sound more sullen than you think you do and suddenly John knows exactly why you've stopped singing and he feels like such a fucking idiot.

🌼 "Oh bloody hell," he sighs, getting annoyed with himself for being an idiot. "Fuck sake, I'm sorry love..."

🌼 Tells you that he loves your singing and always has, that its one of his favourite things about you and thats the whole reason he used to tease you for it. Because he loves it so much he just thought that it was obvious he was only teasing.

🌼 So then he has to chip away at you the other direction, teasing you until you're singing for him again. Because obviously John isnt going to learn the error of his daft, boyish ways.

🌼 And finally you relent and give in and sing a little love song for him which has you both blushing.

🌼 His favourite thing which he used to love watching was how you'd gather all the wains up in your bed with you at night and if a story wasn't working to send them all off to sleep, you'd sing lullabyes for them.

🌼 He liked climbing into bed with you and the children and getting cosy, one big happy family, all huggled up together whilst you sang for them.

🌼 When one of the wains starts singing and copying you, singing with you sometimes John is overwhelmed with pride and he loves it. Loves you for teaching his littlens something he could never have taught them himself.

🌼Will get jealous if its been a long day and all he wants is to spend a little alone time with his girl, but he can't get anywhere near you because the kids want you to sing for them. He'll end up packing them all off to bed with the promise of one last song and then when finally its just you and him he'll tease you, singing your song back to you, making fun until youre giggling and blushing and actually getting quite wound up by him.

🌼 Then hes all kisses and grabbing you, pulling you close, singing and kissing you all over until youre laughing too much to fight him anymore.

Bonnie

🍀Has always loved to listen to music, ever since he was a little boy. And because you grew up together travelling around, hes always known you could sing. Always loved listening to you sing.

🍀Once when you were a little girl one of the older lads teased you about your singing voice telling you to shut up, telling you it wasnt cool to sing, it was cool to know how to hunt and do manly things. And little Bonnie threw a rock at him, "You shut up dinlow!"

🍀He didn't win that fight and in fact he got into a fair bit of bother for throwing that rock at one of the Boswell boys. A lot of trouble actually, more than it was worth as far as youre concerned.

🍀You didn't stop singing, you were a smart girl and you knew that most of the time the boys that said mean things to you were only doing it because they were daft and didn't know how to speak to girls. Had to be mean because they were scared of pretty lassies.

🍀Thats what Bonnie always told you anyway.

🍀Now you're much older and Bonnie is your boy, your champion, and you still sing all the time. You sing to the wains when you're helping to look after them. You sing when you're doing your chores, doing the washing in the stream, preparing the meat when the lads come back from hunting.

🍀You often sing around the fire in the evening when the men get their instruments out and some of the others dance with their wives and children. You'll sing at funerals too, when everyone needs a sad song to fill the silence whilst you watch the flames burning and the remember those who have passed.

🍀Sometimes Bonnie watches you with the youngens, when youre singing your lullabies to the babies, rocking them to sleep... He can't help but imagine you singing to his babies one day. Sometimes watching you singing with the children gets him in the mind that he wants to give you children sooner rather than later.

🍀Has definitely told you this too, he isn't shy about it. Will kiss your cheek and your neck, nibble your ear and then say something about how he's gonna have you singing lullabies to babies of your own in no time at all.

🍀He's a superstitious lad, has his pre fight routines... And the most important is that you come to his changing room, that just you and him get at least a minute or two alone for you to sing his lucky song to him whilst you wrap his hands up. He'll close his eyes and focus on your voice, how pure and pretty it is, he'll slow his breathing, get himself in the zone and then he'll kiss your cheek, give you one of his cheeky over confident winks, and off he goes to fight like a champion yet again.

🍀Teases you, says one day you'll be singing folk songs about bonnie Bonnie Gold champion of the world.

🍀 Fond of a post fuck lullaby, loves to hold you in his arms and listen to one of your sweet little songs. Loves to feel the vibration of your voice in his chest when you're resting on top of him.

🍀 He thinks of your singing when hes scared. He doesnt really get scared so easily, he enjoys most of the work he does for the blinders, doesn't really mind the killing, he's always been very laidback about those sorts of things, always been very calm. But sometimes when he's in a dangerous situation and he's realising quite how dangerous what he's doing is, when he realises he might not get out of a place alive, he remembers one of your songs, pictures you singing in a field or by the fire or with the wains, or how sometimes you sing just for him in the middle of the night, and the thought calms him.

🍀When he's injured after a fight, or after a blinder job that went wrong, and he can see that you're scared by the sorry state of him, he'll force you an easy smile and ask you to sing for him. Partly because he knows it'll give you something to focus on instead of powerlessly worrying, and partly because he'll take any excuse to hear that gorgeous voice of yours. "Pretty as bird song in the morning dove, thats how your singin sounds...."

🍀 Bonnie can definitely sing and he definitely sings for you, little lullabys and sad ancient folk songs with mysterious stories threaded into them. He'll lie with you under a tree at the edge of misty moorlands and sing to you a little irish lament about a girl who went wandering into the mist to find her lover never to return again. He'll tell you she haunts the moores and then he'll tease you when he scares you with his little ghost songs.

Isaiah

🐀You're the life of a party when you sing down the Garrison and Isaiah is always glad to be able to see you dancing and singing spreading joy, stirring high spirits.

🐀He's also pretty pleased because it was him who told the Shelbys to hire you as a barmaid, told them you were a wonderful singer and that you'd have the place buzzing and busy all night.

🐀And its true, you have the power to pick exactly the right song and get every man up to the bar or dancing with his lass or remembering times gone by. You're a real crowd pleaser thats for sure and Isaiah is very proud to have found you. Always tells Tommy "you owe me for that Tommy, my girls the main reason this place stays open..."

🐀But Isaiah has a jealous streak and he doesn't like watching the way the other men at the Garrison admire you. Hates to see other men falling in love with his lass, falling for your voice and the pretty songs you sing, the bright light which seems to radiate from you when you smile through the notes of a happy song.

🐀So he spends half the night planning how he'll get you alone, soothing his jealousy with thoughts of what he'll do when he finally gets you alone and he can tease you and touch you, kiss you all he likes without feeling jealous eyes on him.

🐀Taking you into the private booth and locking the little door so that its just you and him and you can't be disturbed. You getting flustered because he's just stolen you from the floor and you're supposed to be working.

🐀"Saiah whatre you doing, theres pints to pull! You'll get me in trouble..." "Nah love, ain't gettin in any trouble if you're with me, am a blinder aren't I..." winking at you being cheeky, teasing you and pulling you into his lap, holding you there one hand on your hip, one holding your chin and stearing you to loom at him.

🐀"Sing me a song love, one thats just for me..." he says giving you a needy little stare, his eyes fixed on yours, his thumb brushing over your bottom lip. He enjoys seeing you blush, seeing you get a little shy. That shy smile so beautiful. "Sing us a song thats just for me and promise you'll never sing it for anyone else yeah.."

🐀So you do, and you promise you'll never sing it for anyone else, so it becomes your song. When you get married its the song you share your first dance to.

🐀At home, and only when no one else is with you he'll join in your songs and dance you around the kitchen or the bedroom, only interrupting your melody when he can't keep his lips from your lips any longer.

🐀You can tell his jealousy and how possesive he is over you and you love it, and you want him to know that you love it and you love him, so you write him little love songs and laments and you sing them for him in that private booth at the Garrison or in bed when the house is quiet and the streets outside are hushed by the late late night sky.

🐀He LOVES your little love songs and he can't even begin to express the effect they have on him. Hearing the words you wrote for him, hearing a whole song inspired by him... Its incredible and it stokes his ego but it also makes him feel so loved...

🐀Theres also probably something precious to Isaiah about the fact that you admire him and think hes good enough to be the subject of a song because obviously racism is aggressively prevalent in 1920s birmingham and he spends a lot of time very aware that if it wasnt for his peaky cap and even despite his peaky cap, there are many who would think him unworthy even of acknowledgement. So the fact that the love of his life is writing pretty little songs about how much they adore him, how handsome he is, how he makes their whole world turn... Well, he feels very proud and very honored and touched and he never quite knows how to express it.

🐀Tries to write you one too but it ends up being a silly little ditty that ends with something dirty that makes you blush and laugh and climb straight into bed with him.

Michael

☘️ There are many parts of himself Michael keeps secret. All the things he thinks people might think him a "soft lad" for.

☘️ One of these is that he can sing beautifully. His adopted mother used to play piano and have him and his brother sing hymns from church.

☘️His mother knows he can sing too, she makes him sing for her when she's worried, when the voices of the dead are too loud or painful to listen to. When shes unwell and suffering. Michael will sing for her but he'll be sullen and embarassed and he'll berrate her for even asking it of him.

☘️ The other hidden secret is that he loves to be sung to sleep. He loves to lie with you, him between your legs, your thighs wrapped around his waist, his head resting on your belly as you comb your fingers through his hair and sing him a soft soothing melody.

☘️Probably because he has mummy issues. He loves to be spoiled and taken care of like that, to be treated gently.

☘️After the Changretta hit on him, when he's in the hospital, you visit him every day, you're so worried about him but he's got glad to have his "little songbird" with him to sing for him and keep him from killing himself from the boredom of being cooped up like that.

☘️He asks you to sing songs for him whilst you change his bandages and wash his wounds. He likes the distraction from the pain and he tells you you have a healing voice. Tells you its a gift, that you were a gift sent to him from some higher power.

☘️If you want to sing professionally, which michael will definitely encourage, he will pull the strings to get you singing in tge fanciest hotels, to have you climb the ladder to stardom. Partially because he wants to see you happy and will do anything to keep you happy, but also partially because it feeds his ego and makes him feel powerful to have a famous girlfriend, one who is admired by so many for her beautiful voice. You're a real star, shining bright, and you're all his. No one elses.

☘️He keeps his own talent hidden from you for a long long time because he's worried you'll think him less of a man, worried you'll think he's soft. But one day, the day your father dies, you're so distraught, exhausted from all your grief, and michael wants to help you so he holds you in his arms and strokes your hair, rocks you gently and sings you to sleep.

☘️He doesnt think youll remember, thinks you'll have forgotten it because you were in such a state, but you remember how beautifully he sang and when you ask him about it he gets so self concious and blushes and tries to deny it.

☘️ "Must have been imagining it sweetheart I can't sing..."

☘️You beg him to sing to him again, and again and again...

☘️And finally he gives in, says that if you'll sing him a song he will join in. And you sound really lovely together and you can't keep the smiles off your faces.

☘️When you have children michael sings them these lowly lullabies and you love to fall asleep holding the baby in your arms, the both of you lulled to sleep by daddy.

#peaky blinders imagines #bonnie gold x reader #tommy shelby x reader #arthur shelby x reader #john shelby x reader #peaky blinders headcanon #peaky blinders imagine #alfie solomons x reader #michael gray x reader #peaky blinders headcannon #isaiah jesus x reader

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nouies · 2 months

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hello and welcome to the july fic rec featuring my favourite works i read during the past weeks. as always, please check tags before reading. if you liked the fics please reblog their posts, leave kudos and write a nice comment. happy reading! rec tag | more rec lists

— harry/louis —

໑ If Life Is a Photograph by @allwaswell16 (T, 2k, strangers to lovers, canon divergence, singer louis, photographer harry, meet-cute, mexico) Harry gets plucked out of the crowd to take Louis’ crew pic on stage in Guadalajara.

໑ It Was Electric Touch by @allwaswell16 (E, 2.2k, acquaintances, canon divergence, singer louis, assistant harry, age difference, afhf, brazil) Harry, assistant to The Snuts' manager, has been indulging in fantasies about the headliner and founder of the Away From Home Festival, Louis Tomlinson. He gets the chance to indulge in the real thing at the after party.

໑ Tastes Like Violets by @allwaswell16 (T, 2.2k, strangers to lovers, famous/famous au, popstar harry, rockstar louis, social media, flirting) Pop star Harry Styles has a bit of a crush on his makeup artist's brother.

Or Louis has a death metal band, Harry doesn't mind public challenges via Twitter, and Lottie thinks they're both hopelessly chaotic.

໑ A ROad and A ROmance to self discovery by @rockstarlwt28 (G, 3k, friends, motivational speaker louis, student harry, lgbt+ themes, read tags and author’s note) Louis Tomlinson, a motivational speaker for the LGBTQ plus community finds himself confronted with a student who is determined to derail his presentation. Reaching boiling point and landing in hot water, Louis seeks out a place of serenity. A welcomed presence of additional tranquillity and renowned first class student Harry Styles, accompanies him.

໑ Babydoll by @louixamor (E, 4.7k, somewhat established relationship, boss/employee relationship, guard harry, italian mafia, morally grey characters, read tags and author’s note) Married to one of the most powerful men in the Mafia, Louis feels nothing but loneliness and dissatisfaction.

Lucky for him, his security guard is there to fill the void.

Literally.

໑ Couldn't Forget You If I Tried by heartbreakwthr / heart_breakwthr (E, 7k, strangers to lovers, college/university au, blind date, first dates, (or is it?), drunkenness) “What if he’s ugly?” Zayn leans in the doorway to the living room, raising an eyebrow and fixing Louis with a perplexed gaze.

“Then you’ll call me and get me out of it,” Louis attempts a shrug as best as he can with the couch cushions laid out around him. Louis smirks, “I’m going to text him back.”

Louis sits up, his eyebrows pull together, and he crafts a perfectly worded text back to the mysterious man he’s been texting with vaguely throughout the week. He writes: "7 is perfect. See you then. x"

“I’m not bailing you out of this one. If he’s ugly and boring and terrible you’re just going to have to deal with it,” Zayn shakes his head and crosses his arms, his signal that the conversation is well and truly done.

Louis doesn’t mind. He’s got a date.

Louis goes on a blind date. Kind of.

໑ If Control is My Religion… by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28 (E, 14k, friends to lovers, friends with benefits, mpreg au, football player louis, athletic trainer harry, tarot reading) “So just to recap, you’ve been vomiting every single morning, and then you seem to be fine for the rest of the day?”

Louis nods. “Except for yesterday when Liam was eating a tuna sandwich after practice and it smelled vile. Who the hell even likes tuna sandwiches?”

Niall sighs in the way that a disappointed parent might. “Louis, please don’t take this in the wrong way, because I’m not judging you at all. But is there any possibility that you’re pregnant?”

Louis scoffs. Technically, it is possible. Louis’ known he was a male carrier since his routine physical when he was sixteen. But it isn’t actually possible, not really. He and Harry always use a condom.

Except for that one day a few weeks ago when Louis had forgotten to buy more and they couldn’t wait. And the time the week before that when the condom had broke, but they both figured it was probably fine.

Shit.

(Or the one where Louis is a professional football player, who’s in a very mutually beneficial no-strings-attached relationship with the team’s medical trainer Harry. Everything in Louis’ life is exactly how he wants it. Until he finds himself unexpectedly pregnant).

໑ Smooth like Chocolate by @silverstuff50 (E, 16.2k, strangers to lovers, a/b/o au, au pair louis, seduction, sneaking around) Part of the Omegaverse Fic Fest 2024 Prompt: Omega Louis babysits Alpha Harry’s little siblings. Harry comes home from uni break to see this pretty omega baking cookies in his family home.

໑ Beautiful, Dirty, Rich by @starryhazelou (E, 23.5k, strangers to lovers, age difference, rich harry, law student louis, read tags and author’s note) Later that night, Louis arrived home and screamed into his pillow when he flopped onto his mattress. This prompted Niall to appear in the doorway with a concerned look on his face. A beer was being nursed carefully in his hand, blue eyes glassy from the booze.

“Um… Are you okay?” It came out quietly like he was scared of spooking Louis.

Louis dramatically flipped over to stare at his roommate, “I met the love of my life at work, but he’s a club member so it’s forbidden.” He whined loudly, jutting his bottom lip out in faux distress.

“Shit Lou, you had me worried. Thought someone died or something,” The boy groaned, strolling over to plop himself onto the mattress, “So, tell me about this guy you wanna fuck.”

“Ni he’s the sexiest person I’ve ever met. I want to be his trophy wife he shows off, and have all his babies, and be at his beck and call twenty-four seven,” All he received in return was an unimpressed stare, his friend rolling his eyes at the antics. ₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊ Cart girl Louis x Sugar daddy Harry

໑ Bitter Ends Turn Sweet by mandylynn4 / mirandasch93519 (E, 27k, strangers to lovers, a/b/o au, best friend’s brother, police officer louis, singer harry, summer) Louis is an omega who's just completed his criminal justice degree and hoping to get into the alpha-dominated field of police work. He's spent four years hiding his secondary gender in fear that he'll not be taken seriously, or worse, not be able to continue with his chosen career path. After his summer internship is complete, he has plans to move to a more progressive city, where his secondary gender won't be an issue. He goes home to finally relax and spend the last summer with his mother and sisters before he moves and finds that his younger sister has a new best friend - a gorgeous alpha named Harry. With the singer-songwriter alpha in the house hanging around all summer long, Louis has to work even harder to keep his secondary gender hidden, which means drastic measures have to be taken. It certainly doesn't help that Harry is friendly, flirtatious, and extremely tactile… Written for the 1D Omegaverse Fic Fest 2024.

#28th appreciation #1dsource #1dsquad #hlcreators #hljournal #artistsof1d #1dficvillage #trackinghome #*#*rec #thank you for sharing your talent with us!#i didn’t read rare pairs this month sadly :(

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pumpkinheadspacestation · 7 months

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Back with another age guide post! Feel free to check out my other posts! I'll be making age guides all the way up to 13!

Intro to the age guide posts

One year age guide

Two years

Three years

I'd also like to just add in here, the goal of these posts is to help regressors find their regressed age(s) and to help caregivers help their baby when they are regressed to that age. I'd also like to add in that even if you regress to a certain age, you may not identify with every trait, like or dislike that this post has listed because regression is very individualized and each and every baby is different.

Now on to the post!

Agere Age Guide

4 years edition

Traits and Behaviors

☠︎︎ These cuties are learning how to count up to ten and learning how to tell stories and also recall certain parts of stories, they can also how confidently recall and identify certain things they want, most of the time these babies can also string together a coherent sentence "I want to read Goldie locks and the three bears for bedtime"

☠︎︎ You've made it past the terrible twos and threatening threes! These tots should be better at sharing, taking turns and following the rules of simple games. These tykes also enjoy the company of friends a lot more than they have before the fours, they love to chat and okay with babies their age

☠︎︎ Toddlers this age are starting to develope their own personality, they start to have a sense of humor, they become increasingly independent and they love to brag and show off what they can do

☠︎︎ As far as baby babbles go, that should be in the past for these fours, they're starting to tell longer stories and their pronunciation of words should be 100% clear and not just to mama or dada

☠︎︎ Running, jumping and playing are all exciting things for these little ones! They love to jump around and play catch and they're better at it than ever before. Be prepared to chase these babies around the house because they are filled with energy and they have some to spare

☠︎︎ Along with these new and exciting developments, you have to keep in mind that these tots are still toddlers and now that they have more complex personalities, you may start seeing more complex behavior. You're still going to see tantrums and defiance, these babies are still learning how to cope and feel their feelings.

☠︎︎ These tots are fully potty trained and have been for a little while! They no longer need help on the potty and can do it all on their own. Along with this, they can pick out their own outfits, and dress themselves

Activities!

These teeny tykes can play lots of different games but now is the time to spark imaginative and creative play! They love lots of imagination and creative activities, follow the lost bellow to find an activity you or your baby will love

☠︎︎Dress up! Dress up is a great way to let your tot express themself, they get to try crazy new styles and costumes they don't get to try that often, this is a great way for your tot to get creative, missing and matching makeup looks and clothing to make costume is an activity packed with fun

☠︎︎Dance and Sing! Write and perform songs on your pretend stage with your tiny tot, let them sing and dance their heart out, pretend to be a famous singer who's touring the world or get a little crazier and pretend to be an astronaut performing for aliens! Either way, this'll be a fun activity for any rocker baby out there

☠︎︎Craft time! Preschool crafts are easy to look up and find, drive your baby to the nearest craft store and pick out some supplies, fancy paper, tiny pompoms, popsicle sticks, markers, and crayons, then, have a blast with it! See what silly crafts you and your baby can make, you'll have to put the amazing craft they did up on the fridge to show how talented they are!

☠︎︎Imaginative play is peek fun for tots in there fours so toys like barbies, calico critters, action figures, ponies, doll houses, shopkins, lol dolls, baby dolls and much more are all super fun toys for a growing imagination, they can out their toys in a bunch of different scenarios and play it out. It's their own little world and it'll be tons of fun for them to let their imagination run wild!

☠︎︎As stated earlier, these tots can play just about any game and it's time to experiment! These babies are forming their own preferences and individuality so getting them to try and have positive experiences with lots of different activities and games is super important, take them swimming, play catch, play rock star, and barbies, and dinosaurs and sharks, play trains and have crafting time, out together puzzles and cook together! Anything you can imagine, they have space for in their heart

Food!

☠︎︎The palate of a four year old is simple and you don't want to overwhelm them with too strong or too many flavors. A simple grilled cheese or ham sandwich will do and they'll eat it happily. It's hard to make three meals a day for tots and so you don't want to make a four course meal and you don't have too. These babies are happy with oatmeal and cereal, they like gold fish and pop tarts as snacks, give them some carrots and ranch and they'll be a happy baby.

Dinner time foods may get a bit more complicated but dishes like meatloaf and pasta are great choices for babies in their fours. Cook up some cheesey spaghetti and these babies will be happy

As far as sitting down three times a day to eat a full meal, that might be the hard part, so instead of forcing a small to sit three times a day for an hour or more, try offering small snacks throughout the day and serving smaller meal portions, this makes everyone happy because your baby doesn't have to sit down as long, mama/dada doesn't have to cook big meals and you're both fed

Shows and Movies!

Shows and movies that interest these tots are very individualized so you may want to ask your baby what their favorite shows and movies are but even with that being said, I'll still list some shows they may enjoy.

These tots fall into the same category as the twos and threes, they still enjoy bubbly, easy to follow cartoony characters, they also enjoy somewhat educational shows and movies at this age, their brain is super curious and wanting to soak up information like a sponge so try putting one of these shows on for your tiny tyke:

☠︎︎Octonauts

☠︎︎Doc mcstuffins

☠︎︎Story bots

☠︎︎Sid the science kid

☠︎︎Bluey

☠︎︎Word World

☠︎︎Daniel Tiger

☠︎︎Blippi

☠︎︎Bubble Guppies

☠︎︎Curious George

These aren't all the shows you could put on for you tiny tot, just a short list and a quick goggle search or scroll through your favorite streaming app, you can find a bunch of tiny shows for your tiny to watch!

Boundaries and Safeties

Now that all the fun stuff has been said, it's time to talk about the most important thing, knowing your babies boundaries before they fall into a headspace around you. Your main goal is to keep them happy and healthy and Safe so talk to them about what they like and what they don't Prior to them getting into baby space around you. Care giving is exciting but only when we're helping Not when we're harming.

Be open to listening if your baby has an issue or a need that's not being listened to or met. Your regressor is not attacking you when they talk about their needs, they're feeling hurt or neglected, they tell you about it because they Want to make your relationship work not because they're trying to hurt you.

That concludes this post! I hope this was helpful to any caregivers out there or heck even any age regressors trying to find where they fall on the age spectrum. Thank you for supporting my blog and reading my post!

#age regression community #sfw littlespace #sfw age regressor #agere little #sfw smolspace #sfw agere #sfw age regression #caregiver #agere sfw #age regression sfw #agere guide #age regression guide

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may-be-bea · 8 months

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Velvet General Headcanons

♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡

- Has anger issues and severe moodswings. Her parents put her into to therapy once when she was younger to try and help with the sudden outbursts, but Velvet scarred the therapist so badly that the therapist quit. After that, her parents stopped trying.

- Velvet wants to be a singer mostly for the fame, but she also does genuinely enjoy singing. (Even if she isn't great at it)

- Has spent thousands on makeup and skincare.

- Has a very thorough skincare routine that she follows religiously.

- girlkisser <3

- Velvet always assumed she was straight, but never had any interest in anyone because she just always thought she was too good for anyone else. Once Velvet grew into a teenager, she started to get small crushes on her female classmates, but again thought she was too good and never acted on her feelings. It took her a couple years, but eventually, she accepted the fact that if she ever were to date anyone, it would probably be a girl.

- She used to be very obsessed with diet culture.

- Velvet only sleeps in satin or silk pajamas.

- She has TERRIBLE bed head. It looks like she was in a car accident when she wakes up.

- Is almost always wearing nail polish or fake nails.

- Enjoys bitter coffee.

- Velvet hates the feeling of hair anywhere else on her body besides her eyebrows and head hair. She shaves religiously because of this.

- Velvet is more of a cat person than a dog person. (She appreciates a cat's independence)

- Used to be super obsessed with musicals and would sing the songs very loudly.

- Wears a jasmine scented perfume.

- If she gets stressed out, she'll go into her room and violently cry for a while.

- She still has a childhood stuffed animal hidden away in her closet. Sometimes she'll hold it when she's crying. If anyone say her doing this, she would kill them. (No one can know about the stuffie)

- Velvet actually needs glasses but refuses to wear them because she thinks they're ugly.

- She is a very picky eater.

Hello hello to anyone who read this! This is my first time ever posting on tumblr so I'm still learning how to use everything (TwT) Buuuuut I hope all of you other Velvet simps liked some of my HCs for her :D

#velvet and veneer #trolls #trolls 3 #velvet #velvet x reader #velvet x female reader #headcanon

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askthekoopsandjr · 16 days

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Ludwig von Koopa (Head)canons

Cunning, conniving, and classy; this is the surface level of the pompous prodigy we all know and love... or hate. Here's everything you need to know about him to familiarize yourself with my story.

G͟e͟n͟e͟r͟a͟l͟ I͟n͟f͟o͟r͟m͟a͟t͟i͟o͟n͟

18 years old.

- Very important to note: Dragon Koopas do not age the same as humans. It is unknown how they age in equivalence to humans, but the adult age for dragon koopas is their early 30's. Dragon koopas can live for several centuries. The maximum years of life is unknown.

Transgender man, he/him. Gay, asexual, and amicusromantic.

-Transitioned after his 13th birthday. Chose the name Ludwig, loving the high end and fancy sound of it.

Is autistic and completely deaf. Uses hearing aids designed by Iggy to hear.

Ludwig has always been attracted to men, but after transitioning he went through a short period of "now being attracted to girls", because everyone has to be straight, right? Lmao it took a conversation with Kamek to clear that up.

- (P.S. Everyone in my story is asexual because "it"™ doesn't exist haha)

Eldest of the 7 koopalings

- All are biological siblings, born to the late Morton Koopa Sr. and Adaeh Koopa

Self proclaimed leader of the Koopalings. His siblings do not agree with this notion, reminding him that they're a team.

Adopted by Bowser, along with his siblings, at 12 years old

It is unkown exactly how his parents died, but he vividly remembers that fateful day.

- He has uncomplicated PTSD formed from this event. He doesn't currently receive therapy (yet)

Here's the whole story about that:

All creatures in the Mario world... the Underground whatever it's called have all the races/ethnicities of humans. Ludwig and his siblings are German and British from their father, and South African from their Mother.

C͟h͟a͟r͟a͟c͟t͟e͟r͟

Of course, Ludwig is a lil bitch at heart. He's snooty, snarky, sarcastic, stubborn, bossy and arrogant... You get it. Buuuuut! He's not completely terrible and unpleasant. He has a certain persona he puts on when in the face of the general public. He's the GREAT and POWERFUL Ludwig von Koopa, he has a reputation to uphold! However; those who get the rare chance to know him outside of work and royalties will notice he's actually much more lively. He's witty, likes to make bad puns, and LOOOOVES to gossip for hours (whether good or bad) on end.

He usually favors the sound of his own voice, but he's a good listener at times, too!

As you might already know, Ludwig is a total drama queen and lives for theatrics. This means he will show off at any given chance, and act super extra. Think of Rarity from MLP having one of her "moments".

As he stated in Bowser Jr.'s Journey, he never backs down from a fight or challenge. This is driven by his insatiable need to prove himself and pride.

He used to beat himself up pretty bad when losing a fight or challenge, but has gotten a lot better at accepting defeat or trying not to be too upset about it. Take his loss to Mario in Color Splash as an example of him humbling himself and accepting defeat- but also take his loss to Waluigi in the 2020 Olympic Games as how he can still get upset.

He knows he can't be the very best at everything... but that doesn't mean he can't be in the top 5, y'know? So even if he is humbled after losing and embarassing himself, that only means he'll work twice as hard to perfect his skills for next time. I'll get you next time, He-Man...

Speaking of perfection, Ludwig is very knowledgeable and has seemingly endless talents. He can play over 200 instruments, excels in acting, is a surprisingly good singer and painter, and is very well educated in general studies. While wanting to be the very best certainly plays a part in why he's so ambitious, the main reason is because he simply loves learning and doing.

- He owns Ludwig Painting as seen in Mario Kart. His company is in charge of giving each kart their exterior paint job.

Time for a secret... Ludwig has always been an eager student, but has intensified to who is today because of the loss of his parents. Being the oldest, he believed it was his sole responsibility to care for his siblings. He would not allow the destruction and death from before to ever happen again. Once being taken in by Bowser, he quickly introduced himself to the luxurious resources around him to begin a journey of scholarship that still continues to this day.

Kamek was the one who gave the 7 of them their wands. This was not the first time Ludwig was introduced to magic, however. His mother was a sort of "earthy" witch, knowing how to mix up various potions and natural remedies, which she taught Ludwig. To hold a staff of power capable of virtually anything he could dream of, Ludwig chose magic to be his "major". Kamek would personally teach Ludwig magic beyond what he would teach his siblings, since Ludwig was the one who insisted so badly.

- Ludwig might have the strongest magic of his siblings, but don't let that trick you into thinking he's the strongest of them all. Usually, his showboating leads to his downfall.

As his siblings grew older (and with the help of Kamek to talk some sense into him), Ludwig stopped thinking it was his sole responsibility to take care of them. They didn't really want/need that kind of help from him anymore, and it was a bit frustrating to get that through his head.

Beneath those tough scales, Ludwig really does have a heart. He can be kind, and he likes to show affection. It's actually a lot easier to get along with him than it seems, so long as you have patience and don't let his self-absorption bother you too much.

Speaking of affection, he's not ashamed or afraid to let others know that he cares for them. It won't really show when he's engaged in battle, but find him in the castle on an eventless day and you'd see him acting like a normal big brother.

You'd think he'd want to be ruler of the Dark Lands, but that's not actually the case. He deeply cares for Jr. and knows he has great potential- hence why he's always trying to teach and point him in the right direction.

- Let's talk more on what Ludwig likes to do for himself: -

Ludwig takes excellent care of himself. He has an intricate routine for keeping himself radiant every single day (like scale exfoliation, etc). Every night, he puts his hair in curlers and wears a purple silk bonnet. He loves feeling physically fulfilled and looking his best.

His hair is his greatest pride. It's thick, reverently fluffy and voluminous. It's beauty brings him great happiness.

- His hair is naturally curly. It gets that shape from the curls. If you ran your fingers through it, you could feel the texture.

He is more than happy to tell you all about hair care and give you a few tips

He loves frills, hence why he wears that jabot all the time.

He loves to paint outside in the sun. He isn't too good at drawing, so he usually paints scenery and other things that require abstract shapes. He never sketches on the canvas prior to the paint.

This is so obvious, but it should be said anyway; music is his driving force and passion. He only has 5 officially published original works, but has so, so many more unpublished. He creates at a rather fast pace, so he decides to hold back on releasing them until he "feels" it's the right time. He has published many covers of existing songs, though.

- It was his dad that taught him how to play music and his mom who taught him how to sing. The first instrument he ever played was the piano, hence why it's his favorite.

Ludwig experiments with his music. Yes, classical is his favorite and what he's best at, but his passion is music as a whole. He's even dipped his feet in some alternative genres! It's death metal, heavy metal and the stuff Larry listens to (hyperpop, gabba, speedcore etc) that he can't stand.

- Since meeting Suzuka, he's been trying to be more accepting of the rock genres that he loves. He won't want to listen to it, but will support Suzie's decisions and even help him write his music sometimes (as long as it's not the "heavy" parts)

Before meeting Suzie, Ludwig didn't write much poetry, but as it turns out, he's fairly good at it! He and Suzie like to leave suprise love poems lying around for the other to find.

- He may have or may not have left ominous riddle poems lying around to mess with his siblings...

Ludwig is a pretty good cook and baker. He doesn't normally make the meals, since Bowser has employees for that; but if the chefs were ever unavailable, he wouldn't be lost. He likes to joke that he could easily replace the chefs based on his experience of making food for all his siblings. He usually says that to the head chef, because it amuses him to get under their skin.

- The head chef usually gets pissed at this joke, attempting to throw spices and utensils at Ludwig to get him out of the kitchen.

Ludwig loves the theater. He will go to every new show in any kingdom, even if it's in the Mushroom Kingdom. He knows that Mario will be breathing down his neck, but he likes to annoy him and act like he's never done any wrong and act offended at Mario's accusations that he would try to sabotage the show.

- Lemmy usually tags along, as he loves theater too.

Quality time is a must for Ludwig. He likes to hang out with his siblings individually, then all together. As much as he would like to have one-on-one time with Jr., it nearly never happens because the heir is preoccupied with his dad, Kamek, school, and learning to be a prince. He did at least get to teach him to dance once, though. (end credits of Bowser Jr.'s Journey)

- Quality time with Suzie is a whole 'nother story. The two don't spend much time apart.

R͟e͟l͟a͟t͟i͟o͟n͟s͟h͟i͟p͟s͟

Ludwig loves all of his siblings equally. The ones he loves are the most important thing in the world to him. His deepest fear is losing his loved ones.

With Iggy: Ludwig often gets annoyed by Iggy's lack of seriousness and class, but that doesn't mean he doesn't enjoy Iggy's company. They both share the insatiable hunger for knowledge, love of science and robotics. They get along very well because guess what? They're both cuckoo insane! I honestly think Lud is crazier than Iggy! Iggy knows how to make Ludwig laugh, no matter what kind of day he's had. Iggy is also a very touch affectionate koopa, so she'll often do this thing where he'll just stand behind Ludwig and rest her head on top of Lud's hair because it's funny. Iggy also manages to steal a hug at least once a day. And often pranks Ludwig with a joke very often. Hey Ludwig wanna get up dog what's up dog not much what's up with you

With Morton: Ludwig almost never gets mad or annoyed with Morton on his own. Morton likes to talk a lot when spoken to and is a very good listener, so Ludwig enjoys having long conversations with him. Ludwig likes to bake with Morton as well, since they both share the interest. He tried to teach Morton how to cook once, but never again after his hair was almost burned off. The two also share an interest in music, so Ludwig will use Morton as a critique when writing new pieces. Ludwig is also more than glad to serve as a listener to Morton when he wants to speak, and serve as feedback for Morton's very long fictional stories.

With Roy: Ludwig is very patient with Roy's short temper and aggressive nature- maybe because he simply doesn't want to get his ass kicked, or maybe he's just used to it by now. He's not often prone to being hit by Roy, given that he would get him back with a nasty magic trick. Roy usually picks on Ludwig verbally (the usual insults you hear about him. It's pretty funny). Regardless, he does not look down on Roy. When you're not looking, he'll smile at Roy's wisecracks and silly nature. Ever since Roy has taken his studies more seriously, Ludwig listens to him more often and ask for his opinion when on missions. Roy will actually ask Ludwig for homework help more often than you'd think. Ludwig is always more than willing, as teaching others is actually something Ludwig loves to do. Ludwig wishes he could show Roy a bit of affection, but we all know Roy's not a fan of that.

With Wendy: Ludwig and Wendy are the young and cunty Statlor and Waldorf. They have mad gossip and drama to share at all times, and confide in each other with their deepest secrets. Wendy actually transitioned shortly after Ludwig, which was the start of the closeness they still share today. They love giving each other make-overs and shopping together. Ludwig enjoys asking Wendy to put on a magic ring show for him, as he doesn't know how to use magical objects very well, such as her bracelets. He loves how graceful yet powerful she is. He considers asking Kamek to teach him how to do something like that at times. Ludwig is the one who taught Wendy how to style hair, despite having none of her own, so that he could ask her to do his. He secretly enjoys when others play with his hair, but trusts very few to actually touch it.

With Lemmy: Ludwig will act like he doesn't care for Lemmy's silly theatrics and clowny behavior, but actually very much enjoys it. He loves Lemmy's individuality and how he brings it forth to the spotlight wherever he is. As I mentioned before, Ludwig brings Lemmy along whenever he goes to the theater. Both enjoy sharing artistic ideas and even collaborating, whether it be on a stage-play or a painting. Ludwig wouldn't admit to this, but he is secretly awed by Lemmy's natural emotional maturity. He often thinks about asking Lemmy for advice or just having him as someone to talk to about his anxieties and fears, but never does because Lemmy is still rather young. He imagines confiding in his younger brother about these things one day, when he's older. (Here's another secret... Ludwig actually likes the circus.)

With Larry: Larry is the one Ludwig parents the most. Outside of missions for Bowser, Ludwig keeps a careful eye on his youngest sibling. That's a lot harder said than done, though; Larry is a hyper-energetic kid who's always wanting to do his own thing. Ludwig is constantly trying to teach Larry everything he can learn- which he's done a pretty good job with!- but keeps pushing Larry to do more and more, which frustrates and confuses the youngest. Ludwig just wants to ensure the youngest has everything he could ever need in life, but he comes off as though he's not proud of him sometimes. That is 100% not the case, but Ludwig is letting his fears and anxiety get the best of him. They do get along well, though. Larry enjoys playing with Ludwig, and typically succeeds in bringing out the elder's inner child. They have that special big-bro-little-bro bond.

💜 With Suzuka: Suzuka is Ludwig's one and only. He knew there was something special about him from the first time they met. They've been going steady for almost a year, and their love for one another just keeps growing. Ludwig will spend every second of his time with Suzie if he can help it. The two often indulge and collaborate on musical works and teach each other new things. Both koopas are well associated with the other's family, and frequent activities with them (such as dinner, helping out with chores, etc). Ludwig is usually the first to initiate physical affection, but both equally enjoy cuddling with each other at any time.

- Lore time... From the second time they met, he was drawn in even further after working together to help Iggy's stupid newest invention from destroying the jungle world (it's a long story). Suzie was smart, sweet and so unintentionally charismatic that Ludwig knew he had to forge a formal friendship with him. He thought it would be smooth sailing from there... But there was actually a small bump in the road. Ludwig was horrified that Suzie's favorite genre of music was metal (More specifically j-metal but to Ludwig it's all the same)! This actually upset Ludwig for a while, and he was not shy to share his opinions with Suzie. Suzie just went :3. He respected Ludwig's opinion, and it's not like he was unfamiliar with hatred towards rock genres as it was lol. Like the drama queen he is, Ludwig tried to distance himself, but Suzie just kept coming around... And played some classical on the piano to get him to come around. Which totally worked. And wooed Luddy for the first time. So Ludwig decided he would try to grow as a person (or Koopa??) for Suzie. He was way too special to ditch over something silly. The months would pass, the feelings would grow, and we end up at Christmas. With the holiday spirit in the air, Ludwig finds he can't keep it a secret anymore and confesses to Suzie. The two have been going steady ever since!

F͟u͟n͟ F͟a͟c͟t͟s͟

Ludwig is a big foodie, with a heavy preference for sweets. He would autistically explain to you the history behind a dish and how it should be made/served

He went completely deaf at some point when he was 14. No one is sure how or why. He used typical hearing aids for a while, until Iggy devised his own pair that Ludwig could wear 24/7 without causing discomfort. They are charged by geothermal energy. If Ludwig happens upon a place where the heat from the Earth cannot easily reach up to the surface (for example somewhere very cold), the hearing aids will go into manual charge mode and have 24 hours of battery.

While Ludwig didn't had a partner before Suzuka, he did go on some dates in the past. Maybe 5 or 6? [I'm undecided lmao] They were all boys of higher class or with some title to their name from neighboring kingdoms, with the exception of one who was a Koopa troop guard in training. Ludwig doesn't really talk to them anymore, but would say hello if running into them.

His tail will wag when he's feeling affection for someone. Hugging a sibling? Little tail wags. Snuggling Suzie? Big tail wags. You get it

Is a total romantic. Will do the corniest things but look good doing it because of his talents in music and acting. He enjoys showing pda, usually through hand holding or keeping his partner close to his side at all times.

His favorite play is probably The Phantom of the Opera

He resonates with victorian goth

Claims to be ruthless, but has anyone actually ever seen him display such intense behavior that went beyond words?

- Even so, he does get a bit cuckoo at times. It may be a result of neurosis.

He actually doesn't use hairspray or gel

Of the siblings with hair, he's been able to teach Larry and Lemmy how to do theirs

He's fairly easy to annoy. It makes for fun pranks and jokes to pull on him

As stated in Bowser Jr.'s Journey, he's quite good at lying, deceiving, and negotiating. You may wanna be cautious around him.

It's really not that hard to make friends with Ludwig. It's just very dependent on the circumstances under which you meet.

#koopalings #super mario bros #nintendo #super mario #ask blog #ludwig von koopa #sort of ask related #headcanons post #may be updated in the future

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infamous-if · 2 years

Note

O kay okay okayaoakayasysayas Since Rowan isn't going to be a LI can we please get his POV reaction (deep crush stage) of MC going over to him to tell him that MC is in love with one of the other ROs? Pleasee I need the angst and I love Rowan and am sad we won't be able to romance him!!

I was listening to favorite crime and kind of went a bit overboard. Please excuse this lengthy and angsty-ish drabble. Aha.... 🤒 ill keep it short next time

The soft notes of Rowan's guitar--affectionally dubbed 'Betty'--rises above his head, filling the silence of his hotel room. He strums aimlessly, absently, his fingers having a mind of their own as they move, creating a random melody that's oddly soothing. Or maybe it's the very essence of his guitar--he always feels more grounded, centered, with Betty in his hands.

Rowan's gaze remains unfocused as he plays, his head tilted, legs crossed on the balcony that overlooks the sleepy streets of their latest tour stop. A soft, pleasantly warm wind curls around the messy strands of his hair, locks sweeping across his forehead like a caressing hand. As the melody takes hold, going from mindless practice to something that sounds like it can be the bones of a real song, he closes his eyes.

Rowan has never been a good singer, but you don't need to be a good singer to make people feel something. He's learned that from the best of them.

I wonder if MC would like this.

The thought of his best friend makes a low groan sound in his throat, and with a huff he pauses the recording of his phone. Suddenly Betty's romantic notes feel like a taunt, a blade to his heart with every reminder of what he and MC are not. They're not together. They're not anything more than friends.

They're not what he wants them to be.

He knows he shouldn't feel this way about them. They're friends. They've been friends since he still thought fart jokes were funny and he had no bass in his voice. That's all they've always been and all they will be: friends.

The word has never sounded so terrible.

Still. If only...

His phone buzzes with a text and he sets Betty down. That blade in his heart only twists when he sees who it's from.

Of course. Did my thinking manifest them? The thought induces both a laugh and a sharp hint of misery from him.

He reads the text: Open your door.

He turns his upper-body to face his door, bursting up once the realization flows through him. He glances at himself in the mirror on his way there, making sure his pajamas are at least semi-presentable. It's MC; they've seen him in worst states, but level of comfortability changes when you want someone to see you in ways they've never seen you before.

In other words, he needs to look good.

Rowan heaves a breath before swinging open the door, remembering to keep the easy smile on his face. MC still looks good even at twelve a.m. after an entire day on the road. It's almost unfair.

"Heyyyy." He grins, trying to appear light. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"

MC rolls their eyes. "You're not busy, are you?" They lean over to peek behind Rowan's shoulder, their eyes settling on an abandoned Betty. "Working on something?"

"Nah." He scratches his neck, self-concious. "Just fooling around. What, you need to talk about something?"

MC pushes past Rowan's shoulder to breeze inside, throwing themselves on the bed with a huff. "Iris and Devyn are out and I need to talk to someone."

Rowan takes a seat next to them, snorting. "So I'm the third choice?Wow."

They prop themselves up on their elbows, strands of hair falling in front of their face. Rowan has the terrible urge to lean over and push them away. "You're not exactly the 'serious talk' kind of person."

"Serious talk?" He gapes. "Yes, I am! I'm capable of being serious, you know. I'm not an asshole."

With a laugh, MC rolls over on their stomach and groans into Rowan's pillow. Now his curiosity is officially piqued. What could have MC so...like this?

"What's up?" Rowan's following laugh is both nervous and amused. "Did something happen with Seven?" Seven and MC have been a bit...all over the place since the beginning of the tour. He hardly knows what to call it. "Or did Orion lecture you again?" Orion is another one. That man has been relentless since tour started.

MC shoots him a look before sitting up, copying Rowan's position. His eyes flicker down to where their knees touch, to the proximity that's gone from the size of the bed to none at all.

They've been close like this before. No, scratch that. They've been closer, but this is different. This is different because everything is different.

"You know you're my best friend, right?" MC says, putting their hands on Rowan's.

He clears his throat, the skin under theirs burning with their touch. "Yeah...?"

"And we can tell each other everything?"

"Yeah." He quirks a brow at them, trying to stifle their humor. "Are you dying? Please don't tell me you're dying. You haven't even gotten rich yet to leave me anything in your will."

MC laughs but it comes out a bit uncertain. High-pitched. Rowan knows them. The same way he knows Iris and Devyn. He knows all of them like the back of his hand. So it only takes him another second to realize it.

MC is nervous.

His heart does a weird somersault in his gut.

"I have a secrettttt," MC sing-songs. Even as a joke they still manage to sing with perfect pitch.

The four words are enough to shake his very world, but he manages an eye roll. "Fucking hell, we're not twelve. Just spit it out."

"Sorry." MC palms their face, a nervous laugh escaping them. God. This must be serious for MC to be nervous in front of him? Rowan has never really gave anyone the impression of a harsh judge. Hell, he's always been an open book. "I just...I'm in love with [RO]."

He wished he didn't rush them. He wished he didn't hear those words at all. He's half tempted to grab it from the air and shove it back into MC's mouth so they can pretend it never happened.

"What?" is all the fuzz in his brain can spit out.

MC throws their self back, a wildly breathless laugh escaping them. The sound is even better than Betty's notes. "WHEW. That felt good to say it. Is anyone hot in here? I know I am."

MC keeps babbling but all Rowan could hear is a white noise in his head. MC is in love with RO. MC is in love with them.

MC is in love with someone that's not him.

"I just needed to let that out." MC huffs, gazing around the room. "You should invite me next time you play. You know I like seeing you finger Betty."

Rowan can't even laugh at the dirty inside joke they've had between them since he bought Betty years ago. It suddenly makes him feel wholly small and largely ridiculous: Rowan will never be the person for MC. He will always be the goofy best friend that makes stupid, childish jokes about fingering his dumbass guitar and the one MC goes to when Devyn and Iris aren't available.

He's not even the second choice. He's the fucking fourth.

As if noticing the change in atmosphere, MC awkwardly purses their lips and says, "I should probably get back to my room and get some sleep. We have an early start tomorrow."

He blinks, managing a small nod. "Uh-huh." He runs a hand through his hair, feeling naked without his hat. "Right."

They stand and shoot Rowan a final look. "Thank you," they say after. a moment, "for being my friend."

He's really starting to hate that word.

But he smiles anyway. "Yeah. Ditto."

MC grins, spinning on the heel of their foot to leave the room. Rowan follows, waving lamely at them and watching as they disappear down the hall, whistling a merry tune. It's true; it does feel like a weight was lifted of their shoulders. They walk with a hop in their step. Rowan hates knowing it was RO that is responsible for that.

With a sigh he closes the door, leaning his forward against it. Spinning on his shoulder, he looks up at the ceiling.

"I need to get laid," he mumbles.

Though he has a feeling that won't do much to solve the problem in his heart.

#POV character studies are fun #though I'd like one with victoria or august #they're so underrated!!!#also this was a bit moody #I mean this level of internal pain is a taste of what most routes are going to look like in Infamous!#also pls excuse any typos or awkwars sentences i whipped this out and didn't edit it or anything i dont usually edit drabbles sorry!#also rowan is NOT AN LI!! accept it!!! live with it!!!!! (jk haha)#also idc if I’m 24 Olivia Rodrigo slaps!!#rowan hart #drabble

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