FEELINGS ABOUT SUSAN PEVENSIE AGAIN
In TVotDT, it's explained that the reason only Edmund and Lucy are staying at their aunt's is because their parents were headed to America, and while Peter was studying with Prof. Kirke (Who had somehow lost his large house and sadly didn't have room for all of them), they did have enough money to bring all three children. So Susan was the only one chosen.
Which would be fine, which would make sense because she's the second oldest, which would be whatever because that sometimes just how things go when you have siblings
EXCEPT IT'S SPECIFICALLY STATED THAT SUSAN WAS NO GOOD AT SCHOOL AND SHE WAS PRETTY. ERGO THIS WAS THE ONLY WAY FOR HER TO MAKE SOMETHING OF HERSELF
And it's also stated that up until that trip, Susan still regularly talked to her siblings about Narnia, and seemed to fully believe in it.
We saw how Lucy was tempted because she didn't feel pretty like Susan, but she had Edmund and Caspian and all her friends to rely on.
Susan was on her own
Also, LOOK ME IN THE EYES AND TELL ME THAT QUEEN SUSAN THE GENTLE, SUSAN THE RENOWNED ARCHER, SUSAN THE DIPLOMAT WHO WAS KNOW FOR HER LOOKS BUT TURNED DOWN EVERY SUITOR WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY HANDLING THE SITUATION SO AS TO AVOID WAR
TELL ME THAT SUSAN WAS BAD AT SCHOOL
Or, maybe, she learned what was expected from her. She was the oldest daughter, and there was a lot of pressure on her.
Imagine being all alone, in an unfamiliar country, where all people think of you is your looks. Where you don't have your siblings to fall back on; this isn't an ambassadorial trip, this is you being picked because you need to be shown off. Because you are not trusted to do anything worthwhile with your life, so you must get married somehow.
And when the only options presented with you are lipstick and pretty dresses and high heels, wouldn't you rather take to them on your own terms than have them forced on you?
I imagine Susan liked going to parties because it reminded her of being a queen. She was smarter and wiser than half the dimwitted boys who looked at her and only saw a skirt, and she enjoyed talking circles around them and giving backhanded compliments they were too dull to understand. I imagine it gave her some sense of control back.
She may not be a queen in this world, but she'd demand respect regardless. Pretty make-up and fancy dresses became her armor and disguise, and she envisioned each cocktail party as a battlefield: a war won with wits and words.
And she was good at it. She attracted attention while remaining aloof and untouchable. She had everyone hanging on her every word, and quite a few handsome young men throwing themselves at her feet, getting down on one knee.
But she didn't want that. And, too late, she realized she had sealed herself into this fate. Susan was the "Pretty One", the airhead who somehow twists boys around her little finger without even realizing she was doing it.
And I'd bet that, after all that, after clinging to her memories of Narnia and of her siblings being kings and queens in court, she'd be exhausted when she got back.
And then to hear that Ed and Lucy had been on another adventure without her, while she had felt so alone, I'd imagine she'd be bitter.
She needed Caspian by her side, directing her through the fancy people and the debutantes; she would have loved to have Reepicheep following behind, defending her honour; it would have been so much more interesting to talk to a star than the silly, giggling girls she was intended to be friends with.
And it would be hard to find your place, when you didn't fit in that world of kings and queens and talking mice anymore, but you didn't want to be forced into the world of glitter and dresses and getting married so young because the rest of society deemed you too pretty to be smart
I wonder sometimes if Susan lost her way because of all the outside forces pressuring her to leave Narnia in the past
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Not enough stories of MJ, Gwen, and Harry getting attacked at the same time/around the same time
Gwen because this is after her father’s death and the villain going after her is thinking wouldn’t it just really fuck with Spidey if he was essentially “responsible” for the death of both of the Stacy’s?
Harry because maybe he knows that Spidey, for whatever reason, means a lot to his friend, so he’s given out statements opposing his father, so the villain going after him is like it’s gonna fuck with Spidey that somebody who openly supports him gets attacked
Then MJ because maybe for the same reason as Harry, maybe because there’s rumors that her and Spidey are dating, maybe they were going after her photographer (Peter) but couldn’t find him so they just said screw it grab the famous person, maybe Spidey’s a fan and this’ll still affect him
Either way, all 3 of them get kidnapped and put in near death situations, but he saves them, he saves all of them, and they get carted away, and then he’s called away because the villains are all attacking still, so he spends the rest of the day doing really stressful, live-saving stuff, like rescuing a bus full of children, holding train tracks together and letting the train run over his back to save everyone inside of it, etc etc etc
So the day finally ends, he’s in emotional and physical shambles, barely holding himself up, but before he can let himself rest, he needs to check on his friends (who don’t know he’s Spidey, don’t know he feels guilty for all them getting attacked, but thankfully don’t blame him for not coming earlier because they weren’t allowed visitors earlier)
But he has to figure out who to visit first: Gwen, who he found out dies in a lot of other universes so she might be in the worst condition, Harry, his best friend who wouldn’t have any other visitors (other than Norman trying to convince him this is all Spidey’s fault) and gets hurt when he feels Peter doesn’t prioritize him, or MJ, who he’s been flaking on as Peter Parker to be Spiderman (even more guilt if it’s the version where the villain was after him, but he wasn’t there)
(Also it’s definitely gonna get out whoever gets visited first because there’s no way he can make to the second person before the first person realizes what terrible shape he’s in and calls over the medical staff)
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𝐀𝐍𝐍𝐎𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆 | 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐞𝐥 𝐨’𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚 𝐱 𝐠𝐧!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫
ੈ✩‧₊˚ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: you overhear a couple of spider-people talking about you and miguel
ੈ✩‧₊˚ 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: inspired by a scene of a drama i saw in tiktok at 11:30 pm whoops here’s a small scenario while i work on that hiding pregnancy with miguel fic
part 2
You hummed to yourself as you walked towards Miguel’s room. You were so excited to talk to him about how your days went and if you were lucky, maybe you’d get to hear how his day went as well. It wasn’t like he doesn’t talk about himself, of course he does, you two were practically the bestest of friends now. It’s just that nowadays, he seemed more stressed and preferred to listen to you talk. Or at least you hoped so. He never really complained each time you rambled his ears off (which was like 83790134 times a day oops).
But a mention of your name in a hushed conversation stops your tracks.
“... [Name] is pretty close to Miguel, huh?” the conversation was actually a bit far from where you stood but thanks to your extreme superhearing, you were able to hear what they were talking about. You tilted your head. I wonder why they’re talking about me…
“Nah, I don’t think so. Miguel doesn’t even seem to like them.” You grumbled under your breath. That’s just what it looked like to others. They didn’t know that you know Miguel’s favourite empanadas are the ones sold by a Mexican granny on a stand right around the corner outside the building. They didn’t know that Miguel actually remembers what you say to him and even reacts to your stories. If that isn’t what you call friends in their natural behaviour, you don’t know what to call it.
“Yeah, it’s probably because they never stop talking. Their mouth just never know how to close for at least 10 minutes.”
“Miguel is probably annoyed at them. I wonder how he manages to keep his patience from running out with them.”
You bit your lip. Yeah, they were right…You admit that you talk a lot and you do feel a bit bad about it. But your friends haven’t told you to stop talking or that you were bothering them yet so you thought it was fine with them. If your friends said something about it, you would definitely stop and try to talk less for them. You were sure your friends would say something if they were uncomfortable, especially Miguel. You believe in them and you believe in him.
“I know right! If I was him, I would…” so you took a step forward and continued to walk towards your destination. Only this time, you weren’t humming.
.
.
.
“Hi, Miguel! Good afternoon! Such a lovely day, isn’t it?” you quirked up immediately as soon as you stepped foot into his office. As usual, he was on top of his floating station. Most of the time, he worked on planning and storing files with Lyla about which planets had been reported with anomalies. Sometimes, he watched videos of his daughter Gabriella and himself despite having already seen them countless times.
Miguel was lonely. You could see that. Sure, he had Jess and Hobie and Peter, but Jess was pregnant, Hobie was busy fighting against the government and being cool, and Peter had Mayday. You try your best to be with him because maybe he would feel less lonely with you around for him. Maybe he would be distracted by whatever you say from his exhaustion and his pain.
You swung yourself and landed on his platform. He was standing with multiple yellow screens hovered almost around him. His hands were on his waist and there was a glare on his face as he stared at it. He gave you a brief glance before turning his attention back to his work. Well, looks like today is a busy work day for him, huh.
“Hey booo,” Lyla appeared in front of you and waved. You grinned at her. “Hey, Lyla! What’s up?”
“Ugh nothing much, except for Mr. O’hara on his red flood apparently.” She leaned and covered the side of her lips to whisper but it was no use to the said person with his abilities.
“I heard that.” His exasperated response was instant but he didn’t look away from the screen.
“Really? You did?” She asked with a higher and tightened voice with amusement. She then flashed a quick message to you.
Miguel has been working even after you left three days ago. He wouldn’t take a rest no matter how many times I told him.
What? You looked at the back of his head in alarm. Worry immediately settled in your head and you furrowed your brows. Before you could convince him to stop, Lyla quickly made the message disappear and announced, “Oops, my power is running low. Gotta charge them now, byeeee.”
“I literally just checked your levels yesterday. Come back here—” he was cut off by her disappearing form.
He groaned and in his frustration, he swapped away the nearby items on the table. Most of them were papers but unfortunately, he didn’t notice he also swept away the teddy bear that you gifted him. It was similar to one Gabriella had and you knew this from the videos you watched with him. You thought how nice it would be to have at least a physical reminder of your love and not just ones you can see and hear.
“I’ll get it, don’t worry!”
From his strength, the bear was flung high and without even thinking you walked backwards as you focused on its direction. You were being stupid because you forgot that you were on top of a floating platform and the floor wasn’t endless. The bear was almost near within your reach and with just one more step, you would be able to get it.
That one more step didn’t step on any solid floor but instead on air and so, you fell but not without the teddy bear in your hands.
“[Name]!” Miguel shouted and you looked at him and finally, he was looking at you now. He ran at your falling figure with arms reaching out to you and for a second, you thought there was a tinge of panic and desperation laced in his hoarse voice and wide eyes.
Sticky web was shot at your chest and you were quickly pulled towards him. You were hit against his figure and he caught you in his arms. You stilled and flushed, your ear was pressed against his chest and you could hear his roaring heart that beat so fast. He immediately shook you by your shoulders and yelled at you. “What were you thinking? Why weren’t you looking?”
“I mean, I was trying to catch it—” you flinched.
“Are you stupid? ¿y si te lastimas?” his nails were digging into your skin and his grip was beginning to hurt. You tried to laugh but came it off weakly.
“I just don’t want to see my gift get dirty. Besides, I’m fine—,” you tried to joke, hoping it would ease the tension and calm him down.
“Just shut up! Shut up!” he pushed you away with a growl, “Stop being so fucking reckless. I could have done it by myself. Stop annoying other people by doing stupid shit like this!”
He was breathing heavily, anger so deep in his eyes. Your eyes were wide and tears threatened to fall as you listened until it finally fell once he said his final word. Maybe the realization had finally settled in Miguel’s mind at what he had just said. His eyes widened in panic and reached out to you but you took a step back.
Your head hung low as you let his words sink in. Annoying? You couldn't even laugh bitterly like you usually do in situations like this. They were right. You were annoying him. You bit your lip. Had you been a bother to him all this time? How come Miguel never said anything?
Suddenly, his cold indifference to you was so clear and obvious now. Memories of him visibly annoyed with a frown flashed through your head. The sudden awareness made your head hurt and it burned your heart. It throbbed with a pang and you felt incapable of breathing, the pain overwhelming.
No, Miguel wasn't responsible for telling you this. You should've known better, you called yourself his “bestest friend”. You shouldn't have talked to him. You shouldn't have approached him in the first place.
You were annoying. You were a nuisance. You were a problem.
Stupid. Stupidstupidstupidstupid—
“[Name], I,” he sighed, “I’m sorry. I didn't mean—”
“No, it's fine,” you wiped your tears and pressed the teddy bear you gifted him and wanted to catch for him. You wonder if this bear was also a bother for him. Maybe it was. Everything related to you is irritating. You were tiresome. “I should be the one to say that. I’m sorry.”
“I need to go now. I’m really sorry, again.” With a brief glance at him, you immediately turned around and swung down. You almost ran as you made your exit from his office. You did the know where exactly to go, only anywhere without him and far away from him. Strength had left you once you were outside his office and you walked and walked and walked.
Maybe if you left, nobody would find you annoying anymore.
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