#eventually they decided to give themselves a go and have like a 6 month whirlwind romance going crazy stupid w each other super happy

[cowboyabunga]

megstiel is a great ship you guys just hate women :(

[sableu3]

Day 27

100 Days of 100 Prompts 

 Grounder Bellamy / Marriage Alliance AU (Because I LOVE these tropes lol)

(I imagine Wells and Miller as her co-leaders/seconds in this scenario. Let’s just pretend Charlotte is either still dealing with her nightmares or wandered into the fog or something. Either way, she doesn’t kill Wells. Which means, Murphy doesn’t get blamed for it, doesn’t chase Charlotte, or get exiled, doesn’t come back with a plague or shoot Raven. Wow, look at those dominoes pick themselves back up.)

When Clarke finds the cages in the mountain and releases Anya, she also stops and releases all of them. They find weapons, take out the guards, find her people and let them know what’s going on and of course they help. It turns into a battle, since her people aren’t locked up and the grounder ‘army’ isn’t let go. They let the innocent live and Clarke will even offer to donate bone marrow so they can survive. MAYA LIVES! (I’m imagining that it’s only the mountain men ‘rebels’ who helped in canon that survive but you could have it being more or less) Clarke also learns about the reapers and says she might be able to cure them. Some of the grounders aren’t healed enough to leave yet anyway so they stay to recuperate (since it’s safe to do so now) and a few go out to round up the reapers and Clarke is able to slowly detox them. Monty and Raven help with the medical machines and files so they can figure it all out. The grounders heal up, and leave, taking the news of her conquest with them.

Lexa is dealing with the aftermath and it’s not looking good. Nia is starting shit about how the commander couldn’t defeat the mountain but this little space girl did. Lexa decides that an alliance via marriage is the only way to make sure Nia doesn’t stir up a revolt and use this as an opportunity to dethrone her. She needs to make sure Clarke is tied to the coalition beyond a shadow of a doubt. Lexa invites Clarke to Polis to talk about an alliance. Miller and Murphy go with her while Wells stays behind to lead in her absence. At first Lexa will try to force the issue, saying she will pick out her best warrior for Clarke but Clarke is obviously against this idea. She doesn’t care if they are a good warrior, if they are going to be her partner then she wants a partner. Someone she can learn to trust and lead with her, guide her. This isn’t how the grounders normally do things but Lexa gives way and offers to have representatives sent from each clan. She will be able to choose her partner but it must be from those representatives. Clarke reluctantly agrees because she knows they need this alliance. Miller isn’t happy about it for Clarke’s sake and Murphy is just worried about the grounders in general. They follow Clarke’s lead though. Skaikru won’t survive out of the coalition and the coalition might not survive without Skaikru’s support of Lexa against Nia. (As a side bit, now would be a good time for Murphy to meet Emori in the market and connect with her. Eventually she’ll be adopted into Skaikru)

Bellamy is from Shallow Valley. He is their best warrior and is sent to Polis as their representative but he is not happy about it. He lives apart from the main village with his sister and mother. They’ve been hiding Octavia since they learned she was a night blood when she was born and told the rest of the village that they lost the baby. No one questioned their move from the main village and just assumed it was her grief. But when he gets called to Polis, Octavia sneaks out and follows him after leaving a note for her mom. By the time he realises it, it’s too late to turn back and take her home. She reasons that no one will know her there but he is furious because all it would take is one tiny cut and she’d be exposed. She promises to be super careful and there isn’t a lot he can do about it now.

Bellamy is worried about being chosen and how that would effect his life and his sister. He is torn though because it would be beneficial to be the one to secure the alliance. The Skaiheda might even be able to offer Octavia her own protection in case she was ever exposed. He ultimately decides to just be himself and not try to charm her or drive her away. He’ll leave it up to her.

For her part Clarke is charmed by him because he is himself. The others are trying to either charm her, intimidate her, or are mostly indifferent and she doesn’t really connect with any of them. She likes how laid back Bellamy is and she’s seen him worry over his sister as well and finds it adorable. She can tell he’s a good man and thinks she’d be able to learn to trust him and maybe even love him one day. She knows that at the very least he’s her best bet.

Bellamy is actually rather surprised to be chosen. She hadn’t told him before hand, mainly because she hadn’t had the chance to. She had mentioned it to Lexa when she had asked how things were going and the very next morning Lexa announces her choice.

Things progress fast from there and it feels like a whirlwind to Clarke. They are to be married that night. Clarke gets some time to talk to him about it before she is whisked away to prepare. He hesitantly asks why she chose him and she tells him honestly that he’s the only one she could see herself having a future with and getting along with, that she wanted a partner. He grins at her and thinks this might turn out even better than he had hoped for. After the wedding they are shown to a new room for the two of them and Clarke starts undressing. She had been told that they would need to consummate the union tonight for it to be official. She had been nervous about that, knowing that there would likely be guards stationed right outside their room but honestly her new husband is gorgeous and sweet and she’s sure she can forget about her eavesdroppers. Bellamy however, wasn’t expecting her to be quite so willing and tries to offer her an out. She pauses and asks if he doesn’t want to have sex with her. He emphatically denies that and tells her she’s gorgeous but he doesn’t want to rush her or force her, they can do this in their own time. She smiles and reaches up for a kiss and tells him this time works fine for her. So they establish that they find the other attractive, they generally like each other and they are married and both of them want it to work beyond the alliance. They are on the same page, none of that pining, slow burn, back and forth. This is just two people slowly falling in love. So the alliance is secured. Bellamy brings her to Shallow Valley to introduce her to his mother. Skaikru have mainly taken over the mountain at this point and Clarke says his mother can come live with them instead of being alone out here in the woods. They aren’t panning on living IN the mountain forever. They want to build above it since they don’t want to be trapped like they were on the ark. For now though, they leave the doors open (since the remaining mountain men have the bone marrow now) and go back and forth until they can get the cabins built. Octavia is thrilled to be able to be around so many people without fear. Bellamy has by now explained his sisters situation and Clarke has assured him that she will protect her at all costs. Bellamy leads by her side and they manage to build up a respectable clan. Clarke learns more about grounder healing from Nyko and teaches him a few things as well like CPR and other things she learned on the ark. Octavia meets Lincoln on one of her visits since she goes with Clarke sometimes to learn. Clarke and Bellamy fall a little more in love with each other every day and she falls pregnant pretty quickly. She’s about 6 months pregnant when the Ark falls to Earth.

Part 2 (I separated this because it could be left out entirely and left more open ended but I wanted to add it in anyway for anyone who happens to be very ambitious lol) As Skaiheda, she takes the initiative to send someone to Polis and takes a group out to check on the survivors. She isn’t sure if the rest of the ark will fall in line or be their own clan and is worried about how this will disrupt things. She is happy they are alive of course but this also makes things much more complicated. Abby is happy to see her but shocked at her state. Clarke introduces her husband but they don’t have time for explanations yet. They get the wounded taken care of. Clarke has a doctor and nurse from the mountain as well as Octavia and Nyko with her to help. Later Clarke will request to speak to whoever is in charge and Abby is a bit taken aback but grabs Kane and they have a meeting. Clarke will explain what has happened since the 100 landed, the grounders, the alliance, and how she is the Skaiheda. If they want to be considered Skaikru then they must recognize her leadership, otherwise they will be known as Spacekru and they won’t be part of the coalition. They will have to negotiate for themselves. Abby is shocked, Kane is confused and patronizing and Byrne is furious. Clarke tells them she will give them a few days to think on it and that she will be back to answer questions later. Abby refuses to let her go and Bellamy steps between them. He’s already cataloged the exits, guards, and weapons, he knows the best way to get her out of here but is giving them a chance and a warning. Abby bursts out that she’s just a child and Clarke responds with ‘I haven’t been a child since you sent me down here to die.’

Basically this part is just politics and the Ark struggling to figure things out. Will they be able to bend and learn the ways of the ground? Can they accept Clarke as their leader or will they try to make their own way? And of course Clarke is dealing with all this and conferring with Lexa and keeping her up to date and all while heavily pregnant. I’m not sure how I want this to all play out yet. There are so many ways it could go.

[my-brodie999-fan]

The Avengers: Earth's Mightiest Heroes Season 2(Revamped)

This are my predictions on what would’ve happened if Christopher Yost and Joshua Fine remained onboard for all of Season 2 without the interference from Jeph Loeb and Man of Action.

Along Came a Spider..: The whole city has turned against Captain America while he tries to regain his tarnished reputation. But when the Serpent Society attempts to rescue  Viper, New York is put in the crossfire with only Captain America and the equally mistrusted Spider-Man to save them. -Introducing Characters: Spider-Man(Josh Keaton), J. Jonah Jameson(Darren Norris), Robbie Robertson(Phil LaMarr) and Betty Brant(Grey DeLise) Yellowjacket: Iron Man and Wasp try to persuade Hank to rejoin the team, but he is far too obsessed with his experiments and driven by guilt over Ultron. Meanwhile, a mysterious new vigilante called "Yellowjacket" appears at Avengers Mansion to convince The Avengers to give him membership and starts taking out super-villains, starting with AIM. The Avengers attempt to find out about this new vilgilante's true identity with the help of Ant-Man(Scott Lang). This results in AIM unleashing their newest weapon, Doomsday Man. Yellowjacket is eventually revealed to  be Hank Pym(who is suffering an personality crisis as a result of his depression and exposing himself to chemicals in one of his experiments, leading him to believe he "killed" Hank Pym by causing the explosion he used to fake his death.)tAt the end of the episode, Yellowjacket decides to leave the statue of himself as Ant-Man and tells the Avengers that he will save the world alongside them. Introducing Characters: Roxxon Energy Corporation, Doomsday Man, Crimson Cowl(Tom Kane) Additional Sub-Plots: Hawkeye and Iron Man clash over the leadership of the Avengers, but they later come to terms that Tony is better suited as leader. The Serpent Society  and Madame Viper appear as a sub-plot where Yellowjacket stops them from delivering weapons to  the Roxxon Enegy Corporation. Scott Lang still struggles to accept his new life as a superhero  while juggling with taking care of his daugther, Cassie. After he helps the Avengers destroy Doomsday Man, he gladly embraces his new identity as the new Ant-Man while Hank Pym rejoins the Avengers as Yellowjacket. Ultron-6(under the disguise of Crimson Cowl) takes control of the Doomsday Man and set him on a rampage to destroy all of humanity, starting with New York City. In the end, Vision overcomes his master's programming due to the Avengers convincing him to rebel against him and joins the team, although he is damaged by the Crimson Cowl's laser beams in the process as the Avengers promise to repair him. Moon Knight and Cross Technologies are referenced in this episode. Assault On Prison 42: Stranded in the Negative Zone, the Avengers must join forces with their enemies - including former members of the Masters of Evil - to fight off an army of strange insectoid creatures that are laying siege to 42. In the end, Galactus consumes another planet and a silver streak soars in space into the unknown cosmos. Introducing Characters: Sentry(Nolan North), Annihilus(Corey Burton), Lorelei(Kari Wahlgren) Sub-Plots: Spider-Man helps the Avengers capture Whirlwind and wonders if he'll join the Avengers one day. Captain America assures him that it can wait, foreshadowing "New Avengers" Annihilus mentions a "Devourer of Worlds" that will consume Earth. Later in the episode, Captain America remembers what the Skrull told him about Galactus and realises that this must be the same being. Wasp attempts to call Hank Pym who has completely withdrawn from society as a result from his guilt over Ultron and starts to become worried about his health and speaks to Iron Man about helping him by convincing him to rejoin the Avengers. Mentioned Characters: Alicia Masters and Hate-Monger. The Suit: The Avengers encounter Bob Reynolds(who first appeared in Assault in 42) who   unknowingly has a spilt personality known as  the superhumanly powerful Sentry who also works for SHIELD. As the Avengers and Sentry bond with each other , a mysteriously entity known as the Void comes to Earth to possess him. In the end, The Avengers offer Sentry to join the Avengers, which he declines. Sub-Plots: Black Panther is reluctant to reopen Wakanda's borders to the world. In the end, he realises the world can trust the Avengers again after they capture all the Skrulls and announces that Wakanda will once again allow outsiders to work together with Wakanda. Iron Man tries to talk General Thunderbolt Ross and the Hulkbusters into releasing the Hulk, to no Avril. Attilan is mentioned in this episode. Introducing Characters: The Void(Nolan North), Lindy-Lee Reynolds(Martina Sirtis), Normie The Watchdog,   Powerless: The Enchantress offers Loki a chance to exact revenge on The Avengers for ruining his plan to conquer The Nine Realms and strips Ms. Marvel, Captain America and Thor of their powers, forcing them to find themselves trying to learn to fight villains without their superhuman abilities. Thor learns how what feels to be human, loses his arrogance completely and restores Ms. Marvel and Captain America's powers. The Avengers defeat  the Destroyer by damaging the suit's power, damaging it beyond its ability to function. In the end, The Avengers rebuild their trust with each other, stating they will stop the war together and Odin loses his eye and becomes replaced by Kurse. Introducing Characters: Destroyer Armor, Kurse(Keith Fergueon), Ten Rings(organisation), Lorelei(Kari Wahlgren). Additional Sub-Plots: Wasp talks about her feelings for Yellowjacket/Hank Pym with Iron Man and becomes worried about his mental state. At the end of the episode, she begins to have  hope that he will eventually recover from the chemicals and accept that he truely is Hank Pym. Iron Man resumes his former objective to destroy the remainder of his stolen Stark Industries inventions and he and Maria Hill argue more about the Avengers registering with S.H.I.E.L.D. Dr. Doom decides that the best way to conquer the world is to control the world's superheroes and begins to build the Psycho-Prism. As a inspired plot point from the final battle of the 2011 Thor movie, Loki attempts to use energy from the Bifrost Bridge to destroy Earth as revenge against the Avengers. Frigga, The Mandarin and Ho Yinsen are mentioned in this episode. Emperor Doom: Wonder Man returns from the dead and is shocked to find out that the world is ruled by Doctor Doom and The Avengers, forcing him to team-up with the Vision who is the only Avenger being unaffected by the Power Prism as a result of being  repaired for a month prior to the events of the episode As they  get to the bottom of this plot, he finds out that he has been amplifying The Purple Man's power through a prism-like device, enabling him to enslave the world's population. In the end, Doctor Doom is revoked of his diplomatic immunity and Wonder Man declines to join The Avengers as he wishes to atone for his villainous actions. In custody, Doctor Doom reveals to Nick Fury that he knows about Surtur planning to destroy the Nine Realms. Introducing Characters: Purple Man(Brent Spiner) Additional Sub-Plots: Pepper Potts urges Tony to consider building a new suit for her, so she can join him and Rhodey when they're out saving the world as Iron Man and War Machine, foreshadowing her future superhero identity as Rescue. Vision tries to adapt a human identity for himself to no success. In the end, he takes up the name "Victor Shade" with the help of Iron Man and Captain America. While restoring the world to normal, Iron Man and Mr. Fantastic discusses the idea of the Avengers and the superhero community as a whole going to war with one another should any hero oppose the idea of working with S.H.I.E.L.D and how it may lead to conflict with Invisible Woman who may disagree with their methods. Jessica Jones, Shang-Chi, the Big Hero 6,Cloak & Dagger  and Human Torch(Android)are mentioned in this episode The Coming of Nova: The Skrulls break out of Prison 42 with the help of Paibok and Titannus and plan to conquer Earth once again. Meanwhile, the Avengers must help a new hero known as Nova realise that he must use the power for good and stop the Skrulls from taking control of the planet once more. In the end, Nova decides he can't save the world alone and calls Night Thrasher(although not in person) to form "a super-hero team" on a reality TV show. And Galactus shows his eyes open in space, foreshadowing the 3-part Season Two finale. Introducing Characters: Nova(Richard Rider)(Troy Baker), Sam Alexander(James Arnold Taylor), Paibok(Danny Jacobs), Titannus(J.K Simmons), , Rhomann Dey(Edward Asner), Irani Rael(Elisa Gabrielli) Additional Sub-Plots: Iron Man and Captain America discuss the idea of forming a new Avengers team should the main team deal with other threats or disappear from the face of the Earth. Ms. Marvel and Captain Marvel talk about how the war between the Kree and the Skrulls will destroy Earth and all of humanity. Mar-Vell also warns her that the Mad Titan Thanos will seek out the Infinity Stones to erase half of all life in the universe. The Eternals, Happy Hogan and Norman Osborn are referenced in this episode. Red Zone and Code Red: A breakout in the Bio Weapons Lab leads the Avengers to investigate who was responsible for this deadly outbreak. In the end, Captain America becomes infected and Iron Man rallies the remaining Avengers to cure their friend and everyone who became infected. After half the Avengers became infected,  the remaining members must come together and find a cure to prevent this deadly outbreak from spreading further. In the end, Hulk leaves the Avengers and Captain America reassures Winter Soldier that he will always be his partner. Sub-Plots: Red Hulk and Thor have a devastating battle throughout New York City while the rest of the remaining Avengers attempt to find a cure for the outbreak. Hulk wakes up in a prison and sees the outbreak infecting his friends. Incredibly, angered by this, he breaks out and helps the Avengers fight Red Hulk. The X-Men are mentioned in the newspaper. Department H, Richard and Mary Parker, Aleksander Lukin, Atlantis, Rick Jones, Betty Ross and Jennifer Walters are also mentioned in this episode. New Avengers: Taking place shortly after Operation: Galactic Storm, Kang escapes Prison 42 with the help of The Council Of Kangs and attempts to conquer the world. Now a new team of heroes (consisting of Spider-Man, War Machine, Wolverine, Thing, Iron Fist and Luke Cage) with the help of Yellowjacket(who has stayed behind while the other Avengers are dealing with the Kree-Skrull War) and Sentry must band together to stop the cross-temporal onslaught.In the end, while as they celebrate the defeat of Kang, the New Avengers agree to come together again whenever they're needed, Kang is sent to the Jurassic Age where he is chased by a Tyrannosaurus and the other New Avengers are annoyed when Spider-Man asks Iron Man about the discount. Sub-Plots: James Rhodes struggles to adapt to his life as a superhero, but when Kang the Conqueror begins his next invasion of Earth, he is forced to don the War Machine armor again. In the end, he embraces his new life as a superhero and Iron Man's partner. Spider-Man, heeding Captain America's advice, tries to make people see that he is not a criminal. In the end, the people of the city finally begin to realise that he is truely a hero. Yellowjacket still does not believe that he is Hank Pym as he is still suffering from the identity crisis from the chemicals in Yellowjacket. In the end, as he looks at a photo of him and Janet Van Dyne, he starts to suspect that Wasp is right about who he really was. As the Fantastic Four leave Earth to explore the Mircoverse, Kang steals Princess Ravonna from the Baxter Building in a desperate attempt to try and revive her from her comatose state. In the end, her body is recovered by the New Avengers and returned to Reed Richards for further study. Introducing Characters: Wolverine(Steve Blum), Council of Kangs(Iron Lad(Mikey Kelley), Immortus(Jonathan Adams), Rama-Tut(Wally Wingert), Victor Timely(Josh Keaton) and Scarlet Centurion(Rick D.Wasserman)), Eson the Searcher Josh Keaton also returns as Spider-Man in this episode. Terminus, Psycho-Man and the Celestials are mentioned/referenced in this episode. Operation: Galactic Storm, Live Kree or Die and When Calls Galactus: The Kree and The Skrulls head to war with each other, as Kang predicted, the sun will be destroyed in the war. The Avengers and Captain Marvel must bring the war to a halt and save the Earth from destruction. In the end, The Avengers destroy the wormhole,threatening the sun at the apparent cost of Black Panther's life. Then The Kree and Skrulls arrive on Hala to finish each other off once and for all as Galactus's shadows looms upon the planet. The Kree's home planet Hala is about to be devoured by the world-eater known as Galactus. The Avengers must convince the only herald against his desire, the Silver Surfer to help them save the planet. In the end, the Avengers realise in order to stop the war, they must save Hala from Galactus. The Avengers face their greatest challenge when they attempt to stop Galactus from devouring Hala, the Kree's home planet.  Meanwhile, Captain America and Iron Man discuss a membership drive to expand The Avengers. In the end, when The Avengers defeat Galactus by sending him to the Negative Zone, The Kree and The Skrulls come to peace with one another and Iron Man gives Captain America leadership of the Avengers while Surtur orders Amora to claim the Infernal Sconce, proclaiming Asgard and The Nine Realms will fall before his power during Ragnarok. Introducing Characters: Peter Corbeau(Chris Cox), Korath the Pursuer(Doran Harewood), Princess Anelle(Alexandra Krosney), Supreme Intelligence(David Kaye),Galactus(Jonathan Adams), Silver Surfer(Yuri Lowenthal), Heralds of Galactus(Terrax(Kevin Grevioux),Stardust(Jason Spisak),Firelord(Travis Willingham), Air-Walker(Dee Bradley Baker) and Tyrant(Peter Cullen)), Punishers(Galactus' Robots) Additional Sub-Plots: Hawkeye speaks with  Iron Man about forming a new Avengers team on the West Coast. In the end, when Galactus is defeated, they decide to put those plans into initiation, wishing to expand the Avengers' influence. While the other Avengers are fighting Galactus, Wasp attempts to convince Silver Surfer to rebel against Galactus, arguing all beings deserve to live, even if they're intelligible. Elektra, Spider-Woman, Black Bolt and Angel are on the computer screen as Iron Man debriefs the Avengers on the failed Kree-Skrull invasion and the war with the Kree. The Shi'ar, Daimon Hellstrom and Starjammers are referenced in this episode. I would also revamp the Season 2 intro to fit the seasons's storyline: It starts out in space just when the Skrulls and Kree begin war on one another as Tony Stark watches on one of the computer screens in space. The computer screens include Bruce Banner emerging out of the ground as the Hulk and roaring, ready for battle, Captain America fighting in World War II and throwing his shield as the time era shifts to present day with him wearing his Ultimate Costume, reminiscent of a scene from Captain America: The First Avenger and Thor(in his Season 2 costume) fighting Frost Giants as he slams his hammer to the ground and teleports back to Earth as a callback to A Day Unlike Any Other. Then the scene shifts to Tony Stark once again watching the Avengers on the computer screens(this time showing Ms. Marvel, Vision, Falcon and Mockingbird) as he grabs the Mark IX armor in a suitcase and suits up referencing the scene  where Tony Stark dons the Mark V armor to fight Whiplash(Ivan Vanko). And then files into space with the Avengers in their space armors to stop the war. Scenes include Vision using his solar beam to destroy some Kree motherships and Falcon's projectile wings flying in the air until it destroys Sentries. The ending scene depicts all of the Avengers fighting the Skrulls and Kree side by side as Yellowjacket, Thor, Iron Man  and Falcon soar into the air.

[kingdomcomerp]

Lucy Quinn Fabray came from a world of privilege and power; a world of debutante balls, country clubs, and inauthenticity. The Fabrays were old money and there was expectation. Quinn learned very early on that who you were didn’t actually matter, what truly mattered was who you could make others believe you were. And the character she created was the epitome of perfection. It was a downright exhausting existence. Carrying the Fabray name was a weight that Quinn had begun to buckle under. She was swiping bottles from her mother’s drink cart more often, but since her mother drank enough to require regular reorders, that had gone unnoticed, just as the merry-go-round of ‘suitable’ young men had. ‘Life was as good as it was ever going to get’, words continuously spoken by her always intoxicated mother, words she took to heart. Quinn was sure what her future held was a loveless marriage to an asshole who enjoyed sleeping with the flavor of the month secretary more than being with his family, namely a man exactly like her father. Quinn was pretty and her parents told her so as often as humanly possible, but it always left a nasty taste in her mouth. “You’re very pretty Quinny, put it to use.” “You’re so beautiful, Lucy Quinn, I know the boys can barely contain themselves. But you’re still daddy’s little girl.” The wink that always followed that second, always made her want to vomit.

Quinn was known for her cold demeanor. She barely gave anyone the time of day, which strangely, made people want to be closer to her that much more. Many years later her therapist would explain that was a protection mechanism to keep people at arm’s length so that she wasn’t hurt or disappointed, at the time Quinn just chalked it up to her extreme dislike of most people. She was lonely, even when surrounded by others because it was always just so superficial. It was painful in a way she didn’t have the language to explain, and she took that pain out on the nearest warm body every time and being a Cheerio aided in that.. Being a cheerleader was a status symbol, and for as long as Quinn could remember life was about status symbols, and a way to flex her pointless high school power, but the glee club was something different. Though her original reasons for joining was completely nefarious, her reason for staying was even more genuine. She’d found a family, And even if it was a constant internal struggle to trust it, she held onto it… until it fell apart in the worst way possible

If the Glee Club was a family, Will Schuester was the father, and for Quinn, initially that meant someone to keep your guard up with even more than the others. But, eventually he’d shown himself to be someone they could count on, come to when they were in trouble, so when  Quinn snuck off with a bottle of vodka from her parent’s liquor cabinet, because she couldn’t take the screaming and fighting in her home one more second, the drunken call she made was actually to Mr Schue. That night changed everything. It came back in flashes over the next few days, what he had done to her. She’d never felt so disgusting, such shame, and such rage.

The day they put Will Schuester in the ground, Quinn stared at his lifeless body and thanked God, this would be the last time she’d ever have to see his face again.

They’d decided to end a life together and there was no coming back from that, was there? Not only had Will Schuester taken something unexplainable from her that night, when they all decided he needed to pay for his sins, he took away the only real family she’d ever know. At least that’s how Quinn saw it. She was just going to have to find a way to move forward… somehow.

Books had always been a safe place for Quinn. Ever since she was a little girl, she would escape in some made up world in the pages of a story she’d fallen in love with. Cheerios, school work, boys she genuinely had no interest in, and books. That’s what her life reverted to. She never dealt with any of her trauma, unless you count the times she sought solace at the bottom of a bottle. When Quinn was accepted to Yale University everyone was surprised except her. Though the nagging voice of her mother telling her she would never be more than the beautiful arm candy of some wealthy man, niggled in the back of her mind, she knew what her grades looked like, as well as her extra curricula, and she could write an award worthy essay in her sleep. So even as she secretly doubted herself, it just made sense.

Yale, at first, brought out more of the same old cold, bitchy Quinn Fabray. She was lonely and intimidated by those who clearly belonged there far more than she did. Imposter syndrome was rearing its ugly head, on top of a lifetime of pain, disappointment and trauma… but who was keeping score. All of that meant a wall of ice to surround and protect her from feeling anything too real. It was a literature professor that came in and opened Quinn’s eyes to the possibility of even the slightest bit of joy in her life.

Professor Evelyn Carter saw something in Quinn Fabray, something broken, but tragically beautiful in a way that didn’t quite reach the surface. Quinn’s writing blew her away, and she encouraged her young student to put her pain on the page, she also recommended an on campus therapist.

Quinn didn’t take Evelyn seriously, initially, but as time went on and they spent more time together Quinn couldn’t help to let her guard down just a tad, just enough to fall in love for the first time. It caught her completely by surprise, and of course her first reaction was to run, to freeze Evie out, but that only lasted long enough for Quinn to realize she had no one else. It was an inappropriate relationship, professor and student, but Evie was good for her, for the most part. She encouraged Quinn’s writing, nagged her into a couple of sessions with a therapist, and made sure she ate more than the occasional protein smoothie. It was a bit of a whirlwind and the tragic ending only led to Quinn being that much more difficult to get close to, but in the end, she knew that she could love and be loved, and that alone gave her a bit of hope.

Therapy was an on again/off again journey throughout her last 3 yrs of university. She was very careful about what not to bring up, and the truth of the matter was she didn’t feel guilty that Will was dead. What he had done to her, and the others, what he would have done to so many other girls in the future… she and her friends had saved them. But everything else, all the things she needed to unpack and dissect, a lifetime worth of trauma required a lifetime worth of therapy. And though Quinn knew this and knew that it did, in fact, help her and give her some of the language to understand herself and why she did the things she did, she could only be bothered to go a couple times a year. Enough to inspire her, or remove whatever writing block she had at the time, and it always worked.

Quinn graduated and began working at a publishing company while she shopped around her manuscript, and she loved every minute. She loved being around all of those books, reading works of up and coming artists, and improving her own work along the way, plus being far too busy to think too much about anything else. Quinn adored being too exhausted to dream. She’d done what Evelyn said and finally put her pain on the page, in the way of a fictional heroine, using her trauma to fight injustice in the world through the legal system; and editors and publishing houses loved it. It also turned out so did audiences. Quinn Fabray became a New York Times best selling author twice over. By the age of 28, the sequel surpassing its predecessor in sales. Her professional life had taken off so much so that Quinn could easily pretend that the fact that she basically had no personal life meant very little to her.

Being an out though not flag waving lesbian Quinn had no problem dating women once she’d had many conversations with God about it, but there was still the whole not really being able to let people in thing. That also didn’t help much with making friends, but her work and money would just have to keep her warm at night and comfort her in the morning.

It’s been two years since Quinn’s last book and her editor has been getting anxious about the fact that she hasn’t even pitched any ideas yet. It turns out that Quinn has more to worry about than getting the  first chapter of her third book complete. When the news broke about Schuester’s bones being discovered, and in a place they didn’t bury them, Quinn’s own anxiety swelled and her teeny drinking problem began to show up again. What’s a couple of cocktails when you’re returning to a life you tried your best to leave behind, because attached to it is a heinous crime you committed that could destroy you?… Who wouldn’t have 6 martinis daily?

[bigskydreaming]

Hi! I'm new to your blog but found a few posts that were about a JayTom ship, and I was wondering who Tom was? And also you've mentioned in a couple of posts the idea of Jason having a lineup of Titans in his age range and you talked about the Ray and Damage in one. Do you have a whole lineup in mind for them and if so, is there a post on that somewhere?

LOL man, I really need to start pulling all my posts about JayTom and Jay’s lineup of Titans together for some kind of a masterlist, so thanks for the reminder haha. Like, I saw this ask and thought of various posts to point you towards but ugh, I don’t know where any of them are.

Anyway, so. The Tom of JayTom. Aka my ideal ship for Robin!Jason in the series of one-shots about an AU where Jason doesn’t go to Ethiopia in ADITF and thus never dies, that’s kinda grown out of that of a one-shot I started as a writing commission a couple months ago, if anyone else remembers that….the one that was like ‘what if Jason called Dick after the Garzonas incident and Dick sided with Jason’…that one. 

Which then snowballed into ‘well, then I could give Jason his own lineup of Titans who are in the same age range as like a younger gen learning from Dick’s generations of Titans but still older than Tim’s generation of YJ and then eventual Titans.’

Sigh. Oh, me. Right! So! Anyway! Tom in JayTom is Thomas Bronson, the son of JSA member Ted Grant, aka Wildcat. 

Tom and Jason have never ever interacted in canon as far as I know, as I don’t think Tom’s ever appeared outside of JSA and Jason never appeared in that book either before or after his death. BUT by the magic of winging it and Canon Has Not Definitively Contradicted Me, I think the two of them are feasibly in the same age range, so I’m going with them both being fifteen when they meet here.

Tom’s a scrappy, street smart, attitude throwing teenager with daddy issues of his own, lol, thanks to Ted’s general non-existence in his life, for most of it….and he’s also tiny, like, 5′6″ and 135 lbs even at the end of his teenage years. LMAO, I honestly don’t remember, but I think that might be the whole basis of this ship for me, or where it originated. Like, I happened across Tom’s stats as listed on one of the DC wiki sites, and was like, lol oh, he and Robin!Jason could be pint-sized punks together! And then from there, I had the inevitable thought “okay but now make them gay” and then from there I fell into my usual trap of “oh no, it was supposed to be a joke but now I’m taking it seriously and seriously pondering how it could seriously work.”

And then from there it consumed my brain and devoured my life. I swear, it was Dick/Kyle all over again. Ugh, my brain is so problematic.

So anyway, this is Tom:

He’s a werepanther, he can shapeshift into a panther form to fight, which brings up an interesting facet of his character and something I think could be really fun to play off Jason and his own issues…because Tom hates fighting. HATES it. Will run from a fight at any given opportunity rather than engage….but its not because he’s a coward, or doesn’t have heroic instincts of his own, and its not even because he’s not GOOD at fighting.

Its that he’s scared of himself, and scared of hurting whoever he’s fighting…at least more than he means to. Because he has trouble controlling his shift when in fights. His panther form just comes out in response to his own amped up levels of aggression. The fight or flight response for him is actually more like “flight or turn into a raging whirlwind of clawed and fanged fury that can’t stop won’t stop until he’s definitively won his fight….which by extension, usually means his opponent is currently bleeding out on the ground from a few dozen deep claw marks because Panther!Tom’s claws and fangs are SHARP.”

Now pair this fear of his own power with Tom’s natural belligerence and problems with authority at certain points in his life, AND his desire to follow in his hero father’s footsteps as well as his resentment and giving himself grief every time he realizes he even has that desire, because he doesn’t owe his deadbeat dad shit and can’t stand that he nevertheless admires him in a lot of ways and still feels a desire to prove himself to him…

Then pair him up with Jason during his Robin years, going through similar issues and emotions as well as a comparable dynamic with Bruce as him not dying in Ethiopia nevertheless changes nothing about the two of them likely clashing more and more over their views on how to deal with criminals and the appropriate levels of aggression when dealing with them….

And that right there, IMO, is super strong potential for a dynamic couple with a lot in common and yet occasional clashes of their own due to different opinions on which direction to go in so as to address those shared issues…but who likely would never hesitate for a second before backing each other up and presenting a united front against anyone else who tried to give one or the other shit for any reason whatsoever.

Also, I have vastly amused myself with the thought (and the occasional post here and there) of Ted and Bruce continually glowering at each other and blaming each other’s son for being a bad influence on their son, who has never done anything wrong in their life ever, CLEARLY (even if Bruce had actually just grounded Jason the day before. Whatever. Ted doesn’t need to know that).

Anyway, so that’s the JayTom I reference now and then. I’ve always maintained that Jason could really benefit from having a stronger support system of friends distinct to him and not sharing similar dynamics with any of his siblings, so then I was like, well if Jay doesn’t die, and I have him and Dick closer in this AU than they’re usually written as being, plausibly Jason would spend a lot of time at the Tower to get away from Bruce and his own fights with him. 

With Dick being more than able to relate to trouble dealing with Bruce and thus happy to lend a sympathetic ear….and eventually maybe express to Bruce that it might do them both some good for Jason to make more friends his own age and have some normal routines that took him out of the house and Gotham enough that he and Bruce don’t constantly feel like they’re breathing down each other’s necks and keeping tension a constant thing between them. A little space now and then could benefit them both, give them chances to cool off after their fights and actually MISS each other before readdressing the issues.

So then I could see the Titans kinda sending out invitations/recruiting various teen heroes around Jason’s age that they’d all maybe had their eyes on for awhile as kids who could benefit from the same kind of team unity/group support that helped them so much when they were that age just a few years ago themselves.

Which leads me to where I am now which is….I still haven’t settled on a solid lineup, because I came up with too many choices, lol. Basically, my parameters were I wanted characters who could feasibly be said to be in the same age range as Jason and Tom, and didn’t have super strong associations with any other characters that would create any kind of conflict with them being on a Titans team at this point in the timeline instead. And because I’m all about my thematics, I wanted them all to have certain root issues in common that they could all bond over and actually, y’know, support each other with and through. 

(The same way I think Dick’s generation of Titans actually has certain distinct themes and issues that almost all of them share and can relate to in varying ways, which I think has a lot to do with how quickly and fully they all bonded and why they created such lasting friendships and teams between them. But that’s a whole other post, lol.)

So the central shared issues I decided to focus on for Jason’s age group of Titans were: teen/young heroes from abusive homes or runaways, ones with issues and fears stemming from and regarding their own powers or tempers, etc, and misfits who were regarded warily by other or older heroes and considered potentially able to end up on either side of the hero/villain line in the sand.

Which Dick’s generation of Titans, which of course includes Raven, Kory, etc, would not be in agreement with that last part, and thus be all the more likely to recruit these specific teen heroes and be like nyah, nyah, watch how with our help and oh yeah, SUPPORT, they all become the best damn heroes that ever did heroically hero. Suck it, JLA-holes!

(And then Donna would be like, not you Diana, you know we’re cool, its just I gotta do the team solidarity thing and Dick, Garth and Roy are still being Displeased with their mentors/dads at the moment, and also we’re all kinda ticked you guys stole Wally. Btw, we’re stealing the new Green Lantern kid, because Revenge and stuff. He’s ours now, you snooze, you lose).

 So, Jason’s lineup of Titans will consist of some of the following, I’m just not 100% sure which yet, because I have to whittle down the list.

1) Jason (nominally mentored by Dick, but the latter just calls it an excuse for brother bonding time and neither of them make much reference ever to having any kind of actual mentor/protégé relationship like I see the rest of Jay’s lineup having. Plus, Jason unique from the rest already has a mentor in Bruce anyway, so his situation and reasons for being part of this team aren’t quite the same from the others, especially as one of my reasons for this AU was always addressing the issues I have with Bruce’s parenting before the canon event point of Jason’s death, and like…..so like, Bruce does get better once Dick calls out some of his shit with Jason based on his own experiences with Bruce and then later Jason returns the favor by calling out Bruce for taking Dick for granted and no longer putting in the same effort connecting with his eldest and being an actual PARENT to him like he used to).

2) Tom Bronson/Tomcat (who else would act as his personal mentor other than Gar aka Beast Boy aka Changeling, the shapeshifter extraordinaire?)

3) Grant Emerson/Damage (recruited by Roy and his personal protégéand likely BFFs with Jason IMO, as I think their temperaments are complete opposites but Grant’s the kind of kid who would roll his eyes and dolefully follow his troublemaking best friend Jay into likely danger, because his power to blow things up really comes in handy with the kind of scrapes Jason gets himself into and this in turn is a really handy thing to point out in the aftermath of pulling Jason’s butt out of a scrape and then gloating but in the totally mature and “I’m much too nice to actually be gloating, you must be mistaken about what’s happening here” manner in which I see that going down. And in terms of the parameters I mentioned, Grant grew up bounced around abusive foster homes, is watched like a hawk by various groups and heroes because of the huge catastrophic potential of his powers, which he has his own fears about, and also he has no idea who his parents are either, and I imagine him and Jason going on a ‘find out who our real parents are roadtrip’ after graduation or something).

4) Ray Terrill/The Ray (potentially recruited by Kory and her personal protégé. He was briefly a member of Tim’s Young Justice team, but part of the reason he was never that close with the other members was he was a little bit older, just a couple years or so, but enough to put him squarely in Jason’s age range. Also comes from an abusive home, and spent the majority of his childhood living in complete darkness because his asshole uncle told him he had the same powers as his father which meant sunlight would be harmful to him and make him dangerous to be around. When in reality, like his dad, Ray’s powers are fueled by sunlight and he’s like a living solar battery, keeping him afraid to leave the dark was just meant to keep him passive and powerless. Even knowing his uncle lied now, Ray still has long had fears about his own powers, unable to totally shake the fears his uncle instilled in him).

5) Todd Rice/Obsidian (potentially recruited by Raven and her personal protégé. He and his twin sister Jenny-Lynn Hayden are probably a bit older than the rest of this team, but their ages aren’t definitively linked to any points in the DC timeline, so there’s no real conflict between handwaving them as aged down to be right around the same ages as the others. Todd and Jenny-Lynn are the twin children of original Green Lantern Alan Scott aka Sentinel, and the DC villainness Thorn. They grew up in separate foster homes though with Alan unaware of their existence for most of their childhoods. Todd’s childhood was notoriously rough, with him having several abusive foster parents. He’s canonically gay and mentally ill/neurodivergent, which several of his foster homes targeted him for. In addition, his shadow powers are tied to a dark dimension that’s said to prey on his mental state and led to occasional times where he’s been a villain briefly, and at all times his powers are regarded fearfully by most people and with him shunned and avoided because of them. All of which I think makes Raven an ideal mentor for him).

6) Jenny-Lynn Hayden/Jade (Todd’s twin sister, even though they didn’t grow up together for the most part. Honestly, she doesn’t share in a lot of the issues the rest of the team prospects do, and had a relatively good childhood before her powers developed and she found her brother and they started operating as heroes together. But upon learning who her brother and dad are, she’s always been committed to growing closer with them, so I think anywhere Todd goes in this AU, she’d definitely follow, and its not like the team can’t benefit from a heavy hitter like her, let alone more girls. Not totally sure who I picture as most mentoring her in specific, probably because I don’t see her as being recruited per se, so much as just going with Todd when recruited….but I’m thinking maybe Garth, actually. Garth has a lot of range and versatility with his powers and magic, which makes him ideal for mentoring someone who not only has the same powers as a Green Lantern, limited only by her imagination…..but who also might benefit from being mentored by someone who ISN’T a Green Lantern because she doesn’t share their traditional weaknesses and thus she’d be best off training with someone whose own techniques and instincts aren’t geared around weaknesses that are literally irrelevant to her powerset).

7) Courtney Mason/Anima (A metahuman runaway who was almost sacrificed by a cult before her powers kicked in….she’s also right in the same age range as Ray, Grant and Jason, and has briefly been a member of a couple Titans lineups but never for long and usually only for big event stories. But she fits the runaway/rough home environment parameter as well as fear of her own powers….she absorbs life energy from people and animals and can potentially kill them by draining too much. She also has a separate power that’s basically a connection to an other-dimensional spirit called the Animus that she can summon forth and unleash on her enemies. I’m thinking she’d make a good recruit/protégé for Jericho actually, for a number of reasons).

8) Cynthia Reynolds/Fantasia (? Maybe? Not sure yet. Not her actual codename, but her actual codename is a slur, so I’m def gonna make up a new one, I just haven’t 100% settled on what it is yet. Suck it, DC. She’s most known for being a member of Justice League Detroit along with Steel, Vibe and the Ray, but she’s the right age range to end up recruited to be a Titan here instead, like Ray. Also is a runaway from an abusive home, and often deals with mistrust and suspicion due to her illusion powers. Perfect recruit/protégé for Lilith, IMO).

9) Cisco Ramone/Vibe (Also created as a teenage hero to be part of the Justice League Detroit lineup, which makes him the right age range and he’s another runaway. The nature of his powers makes him a good fit to be a recruit/protégéof Mal Duncan/Herald).

10) Amy Allen/Bombshell (Totally self-indulgent on my part given that I basically would ignore the vast majority of her storylines and writing, which I think suck. She was in the Titans stories revolving around Tim’s generation of the team, but she was always stated to be a few years older than the rest, like in her late teens when the majority were probably sixteen, so I think she’s a good fit for this age range. Also had a crappy home life and parents, and her powers are hugely destructive in certain applications…she basically has the same powerset as Captain Atom, though she’s never had any kind of official mentor or sidekick relationship with him. Also, I think Captain Atom is an asshat and a dillhole and he sucks, but I do like his powers, so reinterpreting Amy as a character who doesn’t suck and playing around with her powers instead is solid decision making on my part and renders Captain Atom irrelevant now. I think I shall kill him. Because I can do that. Anyway, I think she doesn’t need him as a mentor but could make a good recruit/protégé for Leonid/Red Star).

11) Carla Moretti/Cinder (Odd choice, given that she’s only ever really been used as a villainous member of Deathstroke’s anti-Titans team and was easily in her twenties at the time. Pyrokinetic who happily makes bonfires out of her enemies but written with zero attempts at nuance, like a total one note villain framed as having long since abandoned her own humanity….which bugged the crap out of me, as she was given a super angsty backstory of childhood sexual abuse and that’s just ‘why she’s like this’ and I have a deep seeded loathing for asshole writers writing survivors as villains and just blaming their casual homicidal ways on their abuse while serving up said villains to just be punching bags or dominoes for the heroes to knock down on their way to the Boss Fight. So I do have inclinations towards making an actual Titan out of her, like with Amy, because surprise surprise, both these characters being written shittily and one note was the work of the same writer, shocking. So I’d just handwave her down to the right age range and have her recruited/mentored by Donna, probably…more due to me thinking Donna would be the best person to help her deal with stuff because she’s mastered the art of avoiding avoidance via having Dick Grayson as a BFF. So with them its not really because Carla needs mentoring with her powers specifically. Idk, Carla anyway you slice it I think has a lot of rage, and Donna knows what to do with that. Written right, Donna’s not a character who judges or shames a victim or survivor for being angry…she gets angry with them, and helps them find options for what to do with that now.) 

12) Hero Cruz (Lesser known Titan, has a device called the Dial H device that lets him turn into a different hero with different powers depending on the setting he puts it on. Basically Ben 10, but Hero came first. Doesn’t really fit most of the parameters, other than being around the right age range, and not even sure who would make a good mentor for him though I wanna say Vic, but not totally decided yet. Mostly I just like him and think he’s underused, so whatever).

There’s also a few other candidates that I have mostly ruled out but not totally. I thought about using the aged up version of Chris Kent, and just introduce him earlier than he showed up in canon. And then Kara/Supergirl could be his mentor because I kinda handwave her into Dick’s generation of Titans anyway, even though it was the alien Matrix version of Linda Danvers that was the only Supergirl ever on the team. Whatever. She should have been a Titan all along anyway. But also Chris would fit the team well as he had an abusive childhood as well, at his dad General Zod’s hands, and again, I just like the character. 

Thought of including Virgil Hawkins/Static too, even though I think he’s closer to Tim’s age range. And again, just another character I’m a fan of and think is underused, but he would definitely be an odd man out in this group because like….he comes from a happy, healthy, loving home and family, and he loves his powers. So he would constantly be just like nodding his head along while his teammates talk and like ugh that sucks, but 10/10 absolutely can not relate, my parents are awesome.  Same with Natasha Irons/Steel, who really would have to be handwaved to even be in the right age range, and again has a happy loving home environment and a superhero uncle of her own so its not like she needs a Titan mentor…..but I kinda wanna see Karen Beecher/Bumblebee take her under her wing anyway, and have them be science nerds together.

Also pretty much the only reason I ruled out Connor Hawke too, as he doesn’t really match the rest of the team in any of the parameters except for feasibly being right at the upper edge of the same age range. But again, I just love the character. 

So I’m probably gonna end up throwing at least one of these other characters in there anyway, lol. I do know myself).

Anyway. So that’s Jason’s lineup of Titans, or at least the candidates as they exist bouncing around in my head now. Also, they’re pretty much Team “Everyone is Gay Except For When They’re Bi.” Which, granted, is basically how I view Dick’s generation of Titans, but with them I have to be like Make It So, in my brain, whereas with this group like….canon’s actually done the work for me for the most part lol. Ray is gay, Todd Rice is gay, Courtney is bi, Hero is gay. And I can’t actually find anything confirmed Tom was stated to be gay somewhere in canon, but I SWEAR he was, like, ugh this is bugging me.

But anyway. That’s that about all of that.

[swissmissficrecs]

Johnlock Advent Calendar, Part 2

Back in 2014, I posted a Johnlock Advent Calendar of 24 fic recs related to Christmas. There have been a lot of good ones posted since then, so it’s time for part 2! 1. a good old-fashioned happy ending (32731 words) by darcylindbergh Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: And Sherlock stands there, in the middle of a Christmas market as John hums along to Silent Night, John’s hand warm in his with fingertips a little gritty from the cinnamon-sugar doused churros they’d shared, and thinks, oh, that’s–that’s an idea, isn’t it? For Christmas this year, Sherlock wants to get John something special: something every fairytale deserves.

2. A Party on Christmas Eve (15729 words) by PoppyAlexander Rating: General Audiences Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: A collection of ficlets for December, prompted by MissDavis in her 2018 Advent Ficlet Challenge. John and Sherlock first meet when John moves into 221C Baker Street. Will romance bloom before a party on Christmas eve? (spoiler alert: Yes, it will. Of course it will.) I'm going to try to cram in all our favourite holiday fic tropes here, too. Enjoy!

3. a vein of frost (58023 words) by Zingiber Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, John Watson/Original Female Character(s) Summary: As winter falls over London, Sherlock finds himself struggling to cope with a five-year-old goddaughter, a bizarre series of holiday-themed murders, and a new woman in John's life. Written for the Sherlock December Ficlet Challenge.

4. Another Auld Lang Syne (30234 words) by DiscordantWords Rating: Mature Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Characters: Sherlock Holmes, John Watson, Rosamund Mary "Rosie" Watson, Mrs. Hudson (Sherlock Holmes), Molly Hooper, Mycroft Holmes, Greg Lestrade Additional Tags: Christmas, Angst with a Happy Ending, Pining Sherlock, Pining John, Post-Season/Series 04, First Kiss, Holidays, Winter, Advent Calendar, Past Drug Use, Angst, Eventual Happy Ending, Ficlet Collection, Drinking, New Year's Eve, New Year's Kiss Summary: There had been years of missed chances.

5. Breaking Christmas (18606 words) by MissDavis Rating: Mature Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: Join me in some established relationship Johnlock as I attempt to make Sherlock and John participate in some Seasonal Fucking Cheer. Chapter 18: John's New Year's Eve Appointment: In which John finally comes around to Sherlock's point of view that the pleasure derived from a bit of body piercing far outweighs any risks involved.

6. Christmas Time After Time (41543 words) by PlaidAdder Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, Mary Morstan/John Watson, Clara/Harry Watson Summary: John's not really big on Christmas; and this year, the first after Mary's death, he's not feeling it. Everyone's away, Sherlock's on a case--alone--and Rosie's asleep. But that's all right. He's fine. He'll just have a quiet Christmas Eve by himself, drinking in front of the telly.  Only out there in time and space, there's another Doctor who thinks that sounds like the saddest thing ever. And she's going to do something about it. Thirteen takes John on a whirlwind tour of Christmases past and future. The more he learns about this time travel thing, the more John starts to wonder how his current timeline became...what it is. Might these alternatives hold the key to a less miserable present, and maybe a brighter future?

7. Christmas With You (23081 words) by MissDavis Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: Watch Sherlock, John and Rosie over the years as they celebrate the season as only they can.

8. Elementary, Actually (26526 words) by blueink3 Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: Just back from the war, 26-year-old John Watson is looking for a job. Luckily, his old buddy Mike Stamford has one in mind: “Mike, you did not tell me this was a porno.” “What? It’s not!” “No? Then why the hell am I being asked to eventually take my kit off and mount some kid who barely looks like he’s out of secondary!” He expects Mike to be angry or indignant on his behalf, but what he does not expect is for the man to burst out laughing on the other end of the phone. “Mike!” “Sorry, sorry. Are you serious? Frankie told me it was an art house/independent type but I thought he meant Little Miss Sunshine, not Eyes Wide Shut!”  “Oh my God, Mike, I’m going to kill you.” Or, what happens when the author watches Love Actually with Johnlock in mind.

9. Five Christmases that went wrong and one that didn't (11685 words) by love_in_mind_palace Rating: Mature Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: John isn’t sure about most of the things in his life. Except for the fact that he loves Sherlock, Sherlock loves him back and that after years of bad luck, he is getting the Christmas he always deserved.

10. Ghost Stories (22256 words) by SwissMiss Rating: Mature Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: Sherlock's parents think he and John are a couple. They might be onto something.

11. Ghosts (14752 words) by orphan_account Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: A dead man is haunted by ghosts at Christmastime and, together, they help bring him back to life

12. Home for Christmas (19499 words) by SilentAuror Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: It's been eleven months since Eurus Holmes happened, and just one since John and Rosie moved back into Baker Street at last. With Christmas just around the corner, both Sherlock and John are slightly baffled when Mrs Hudson decides to give them a slow cooker as a "house-warming present"...

13. I Just Want You for My Own (166706 words) by cwb Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: Sherlock and John head home from their respective schools for the winter break.

14. In Bed (46922 words) by Ellipsical Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: The sequel to Guilty Secrets. How do the sons of silent, bitter houses love? Like this.

15.  Johnlock Advent 2018 (47773 words) by sussexbound Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: Some of you may remember the 2017 Johnlock Advent. It was a collaboration between @honeybeelullaby, @chained-to-the-mirror, and myself. @honeybeelullaby provided the wonderful prompts, @chained-to-the-mirror drew pictures based on those, and I wrote a ficlet for each one. It was a real blessing for all three of us then, so… IT’S BACK!!

16. Let Nothing You Dismay (13326 words) by OpalJade Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: For lack of a better Christmas gift idea, John makes a booklet of redeemable coupons for Sherlock. 17. Merlot (14844 words) by Itsallfine Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: “Because you’ve been through enough. The both of you have been through so much, and it’s time to just be happy, okay?” she continued, rather more gently. “It’s time. You asked for my help, and I’m giving it. Let yourself be happy, Sherlock Holmes.” Sherlock and John work toward becoming something more as they prepare to host the Holmes parents at 221B for the holidays. Written for the 25 Days of Fic-Mas 2015 challenge on tumblr. Chapter 16 is the only explicit one and can be easily skipped. The rest of the fic is rated T.

18. Oh, my friends, it's been a long hard year (11914 words) by splix Rating: Mature Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, Mycroft Holmes/Greg Lestrade, Mr. Chatterjee/Mrs. Hudson, Sherlock Holmes' Father/Mummy (Sherlock) Summary: Christmas is rubbish this year.

19. Points (53791 words) by lifeonmars Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: The little things are infinitely the most important. -- "A Case of Identity," Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. What if His Last Vow never happened? This fic picks up a few months after John and Mary's wedding, in an alternate universe where Magnussen doesn't exist, but Mary is still pregnant. Life continues -- just in a different direction. And slowly, Sherlock and John find their way to each other.

20. Sherlock Holmes and the Case of the Missing Christmas Spirit (15002 words) by SilentAuror Rating: Mature Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: John hates Christmas. So does Sherlock, but he suggests that they do Christmas "properly" this year to see if they can't track down its elusive magic and discover for themselves what Christmas is supposed to be about.

21. The Adventure of the Crossed Streams (23239 words) by mydwynter Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: I scowled, annoyed as usual by Holmes's intrusion on my privacy. I was afraid that some day he might read something more telling, something more dangerous, and that in uncovering the truth he would ruin our intimate friendship for good. "I’m not exactly feeling up to scratch this morning, Holmes." "And yet your eyebrows continue their semaphore." Christmas Eve day. Come mid-morning, Holmes and Watson find themselves with three gifts, two cases, and one mild hangover. If they're lucky, they won't be additionally burdened with a partridge in a pear tree—though with the direction everything is heading, Watson wouldn't bet against it.

22. To the Gold of Frankincense through Myrrh (10031 words) by sideris Rating: Explicit Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson Summary: After Sherlock's imprisonment for the murder of Charles Augustus Magnussen, he's released on licence into Mycroft's care. It's December and when Mycroft asks him what he'd like for Christmas, there's only one answer. "John."

23. The Holiday Cycle (115450 words) by flawedamythyst Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, Sherrinford Holmes/Molly Hooper Summary: “If we vote to allow you to be an exception to the law, you will celebrate every holiday,” said Father Christmas. “With as much enthusiasm as you can." John and Sherlock made a deal so that Sherlock could come home. Now it's time for them to uphold it.

24. The Key (11689 words) by 221b_careful_what_you_wish_for Rating: Mature Relationships: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson, James Sholto/John Watson, Sherlock Holmes/Victor Trevor Summary: Six months after the tarmac scene, John gives his key to 221B Baker Street back to Sherlock, deciding he needs a clean start -- but there's too much left unresolved for that to easily happen. (I wrote this purely for the feels, wondering what would happen if John walked away after all the trauma of S3... You know they can't stay apart, but what might happen in between?)

[hoodoo12]

And So It Begins (3/?)

SFW, with a minor mature scene. Orc/Human.

Part 1, Part 2, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6

When Grar returned, he carried not only his axe, but a rolled bundle of fur.

“This is better quality than what you have now,” he told you without bragging.

You were getting used to his straightforward manner, but protested the gift. He refused to take back the heavy elk hide, however, and eventually you thanked him for it.

You spent another day of hard labor chopping wood. For a meal your mother also asked if you would check the fish traps; Grar accompanied you to the stream again as you harvested the trout that had swum into the wooden traps but couldn’t get back out.

As you killed and cleaned them on the rocks streamside he asked if you ever had salmon in this stream. You told him no, it wasn’t one that salmon ran, but there was a pond a little further away with bass and mudcrabs. He told you there was a river near his cabin wear he had seen bears take salmon, although he wasn’t much of a fisherman. You nodded, thinking it might be nice to have some of the fatty fish occasionally.

Your mother wrapped the fish with herbs and cooked them while you and the Orc stacked the logs. The amount you’d chopped exceeded what you’d usually set aside by this time of year, and you thanked him. Having so much so early would give the wood time to dry, which meant it would burn longer and produce less smoke in the colder months.

Once again you shared a pleasant meal.

At the end, as he collected his things to go, he mentioned that he was expanding the firepit he had in his cabin. Although it was functional, like what you and your mother had, he decided to make it a real fireplace with a chimney and hearth. He’d already collected the stones for the chimney, but if you’d like to see the slate he was considering for the interior of the cabin, he wouldn’t mind showing you.

Thinking that if you could help him collect the slate it would be a nice way to help repay him for what he’d done for you and your mother, you agreed.

Another twitch that could possibly be the beginning of a smile danced around his lips. He gave you a real nod this time, and was gone again.

You watched until he was out of sight, when your mother shuffled up beside you.

“He’s very nice,” she commented. 

“Yes. I don’t want him to neglect his own work, though,” you fretted. “It’s getting later in the year and he should be focusing on making sure his traps are ready and he has enough supplies for hunting.”

“I’m sure he’s taking all that into consideration,” your mother replied. You murmured your continued concern, and she went on, “Orcs can be temperamental, which is why so many choose a warrior’s path, but they also have a strong work ethic too. No lazing about.”

Your thoughts were on him for a moment more, before your mother’s words made an impression.

“You knew he was an Orc?”

“Of course!” she chided slightly, with a smile. “Well, I can’t tell if he is full-blooded or half-Orc. He mentioned his Clan. And his hands are so large, plus when he speaks I can tell he is so tall compared to us! He also has a very faint lisp. He has tusks, doesn’t he?”

You shouldn’t underestimate your mother’s observational skills. “Yes, he does.” Then you paused, and told her, “He’s full Orc.”

“Ah,” your mother said, nodding. She took your hand. “Then I am sure he isn’t forgoing whatever it is he needs to do for the season’s hunting, no matter how much time he spends with you.”

Your eyebrows drew together in puzzlement. Your mother couldn’t see the expression, but you were sure she could hear your confusion when you asked, “What do you mean by that?”

She laughed, but not unkindly. “He’s courting you, silly!”

It felt like the air had been sucked out of your lungs. “Courting me?!” you croaked.

“Yes, of course he is.”

You tried to make everything you just heard fit into your world. It didn’t make sense, and you said so. You told her that he was just helpful; that he was generous; that he thought he owed you since you shot the archer when he was being attacked; that he was friendly, or lonely; that what she said couldn’t be true--

“Don’t you think what he’s done eclipses the assistance you gave him?” your mother asked quietly. “And people from the village know our situation. When was the last time any man volunteered to lend a hand with the work that needs done?”

With that, she squeezed your hand and left you again, still staring at the forest Grar had disappeared into, a whirlwind of thoughts and questions in your head. You couldn’t deny the warm feeling that blossomed in your belly, however, when you thought about him.

⁂

Mid-summer, when you hadn’t seen Grar for several weeks, you decided that you would try and find the river he told you about, with the salmon. Bidding your mother farewell, telling her you hoped to be back before nightfall, you took some bread and berries, your bow and the dagger Grar had sharpened for you, and set off. You only had a general idea where Grar’s cabin may be, but if the stream near your hut branched off from a larger river, that may be the exact one he was talking about.

The wilderness was unbroken, and you realized you were heading uphill. That was fine; you didn’t expect the land to be flat and covered in the same forest you’d lived your life. It was nice to have some elevation when the trees weren’t so thick, and you could see the surrounding area. As a matter of fact, you found a sturdy tree to climb to survey everything.

Making sure to hold tightly, you could see the smoke from the fires in your village, although the structures themselves weren’t visible. Turning, you saw that the hill became part of a larger chain, and further away, they became mountains. You also caught sight of a river--the river, you hoped!--and mapped where it was so you could head than direction after you ascended.

After the bandit attack you witnessed, you tried to keep more aware of your surroundings. You tried to be quiet. You tried to keep an eye out for any plants that could be helpful to your mother. You only carried a satchel today, over your back; it wasn’t large but could hold a squirrel or two if you were quick enough to shoot them or handfuls of different plants if needed.

You heard the river before you saw it. It was louder than your stream; you’d seen that it had boulders in it and if the waters came from higher up it could be fast. You were still cautious, because wild animals would use it too and you had no desire to startle a bear or sabre cat.

Luckily the way to the river was relatively even; although it continued slightly uphill and you did have to skirt boulders and climb occasional crags of rock, you didn’t have to climb. It seemed like there was a flatter bit of land up ahead. That was your goal, although you had to watch you where you put your feet to not slip in the gravel.

With your head down, you caught sight of movement out of the corner of your eye.

Automatically you stepped behind the boulder you had one hand on for balance, breaking the direct line of sight between you and whatever you’d seen. You also froze and listened hard to try and determine what it was.

The sound of the tumbling water was too much to hear anything. Carefully, carefully, you crouched down and peeped around the rock.

It was Grar. You saw a natural pool had formed to the side of the swifter water, and it looked as though he’d dammed some of it up for depth and ease of access. He was nude, crouched to scoop water to drink. You could see the scar where the arrow had pierced his shoulder, as well as other minor scars down his back to his buttocks. His clothes and weapons were piled neatly far enough away they didn’t get splashed.

As you spied on him, he loosened his hair out of its plait and shook it free. Then, without testing the temperature or easing into it, he stepped into the pool.

You had no way of knowing how deep it was, or if he simply submerged himself, but he was out of sight the next moment. You blinked and waited. You had no idea Orcs could swim, and had always been told they had an aversion to water. Like so many other things you’d learned, this was another lie. Your thoughts then moved to wondering how long an Orc could stay underwater--

Grar stood up. His gasp for air and the fact you could see gooseflesh erupt all over his skin told how cold the water happened to be. The Orc rubbed his upper arms and chest vigorously. He grabbed a cloth you hadn’t noticed from the bank of the pool and washed. It dawned on you that you recognized the fabric; it was the same you’d wrapped a loaf of bread for him. Your old dress! Then he climbed back out of the pool, streaming water as he went.

You knew he was large; Orcs towered over men and were broader and heavier too. But seeing him naked made your heart catch in your throat. The cold water made his skin color bright. His chest and waist were wide, but proportionate. His hair, looking flat black after being drenched plastered to his neck and shoulders, was in stark contrast to the color of his body. There was no hair on his chest. A thin line of it marked the way from his navel to his pubic area, where it became fuller at the base of his cock.

You didn’t mean to look, but your eyes didn’t listen to your manners. His cock was darker colored and thick. It should surprise you, it should scare you, but it didn’t; instead, that warm sensation you felt in your gut when he was around flared. Your thoughts took a naughty turn, an unladylike turn, and your cheeks burned too.

Grar had another cloth to dry himself with, which he did, squeezing the water from his hair. You watched him in secret a while longer. He used a blade to shave the sides of his head, and didn’t immediately re-braid it. It was the first time you’d seen it flowing down his back. Part of you wanted to call out to him, but another part reminded you that you were spying and rude, no matter how aroused you were.

Finally, you quietly crept away.

You told your mother you didn’t have any luck, but maybe you’d try again another day. She couldn’t see how flushed your face remained. 

tbc . . .

[forwardintimerp]

MERCEDES JONES EVANS is a 30 YEAR OLD, who looks like AMBER RILEY. Married to SAM EVANS, she is a SINGER/SONGWRITER and is currently TAKEN.

________________________________________________________________  

NEGATIVE TRAITS: Stubborn, Sarcastic, and Sassy

POSITIVE TRAITS: Hardworking, Determined, Loyal

________________________________________________________________  

THE STORM: Sam, a self proclaimed Bachelor, awakes to find himself married to Mercedes, a hopeless romantic Diva, a woman he heard of but doesn’t know, and a father to 27 month old Cameron and unborn twins. Now he has to figure out how to be a full fledged family man.

________________________________________________________________  

SAM AND MERCEDES HISTORY:

Mercedes Jones and Sam Evans met 5 and a half years ago when Mercedes came back from her world tour, while neither one was looking for a relationship, they found themselves drawn to one another.

They married a year after meeting in an intimate ceremony at the Tahiti Pearl Beach Resort.

6 months after their marriage, they found out they were pregnant with their now 27 month old son, and recently found out Mercedes was 3 months pregnant with twins.

Sam and Mercedes recently bought a home in the suburbs of New York, to allow for their growing family.

________________________________________________________________  

HEADCANONS:

PAST HEADCANONS

Mercedes Ari Jones is the youngest and only daughter of Plastic Surgeon Percy Jones and Musical Diva Yvette Jones, formerly Hann of the Hann sisters. It was obvious that  music coursed through her blood. It’s who she was and all she knew, she was singing before she started talking. So no one was surprised when she declared at 5 years old she was going to be a singer.

Her career officially started at 14 when she and her friends convinced their parents to drive them to Los Angeles for a music competition and they won. They named themselves “3 Major” an all girl group and for Four years they were a success touring and performing locally around LA first and then around the US. While they were good, Mercedes wanted to be more than local talent, she wanted to be a Superstar.

When he wasn’t recording she was studying and when she wasn’t studying she was singing and getting her name out there. By her Sr. year she was loving the fact that she was living her dream on her terms. It was then she was approached about going solo. It was a hard choice but Mercedes decided it was time for her to let go and she started working on her solo Album.

Once it dropped everything was like a whirlwind for Mercedes as it earned her, her first Grammy. It also brought the opportunity for her to Open for Beyonce’ on Tour. How could Mercedes turn down the chance of a lifetime to tour? She couldn’t. So she spent her Sr. Year being home-schooled on a bus.

After Graduation, Mercedes released her second Album which made it to number 2 the day it was released and jumped to number one the following week. While working on her music career took business courses and by the time she was 24, Mercedes had Graduated from UCLA in Business Management, had four top charting albums, three stalkers and two of her own world tours, but something was missing.

When she met Sam, she had just moved to NYC,  it was supposed to be a temporary move, so she could  find another sound, work on her newest Album and be a little closer to her family, but it turned into so much more. Sam wasn’t who she thought he was, at first he seemed like a Bachelor, someone who never wanted to get married, but she couldn’t deny the attraction she felt towards him. Finally giving in to Sam, she fell in love and when he asked her to marry him, she contemplated taking a break from music to focus on her life for once.

________________________________________________________________

PRESENT HEADCANON

Sam was a breath of fresh air, loving her for the woman she was and not for the star she became, he made her life easier by just being himself. So when they decided to start a family right away with them both being close to 30, Merce was ready. And now that she was a mom, she loved it.

Her career was at its height, so if she wanted to be a mom, now would be the best time. She had toured around the world, as well as given two USO tours, she performed on Broadway in the Wiz, she was in the blockbuster movie “Nobody’s Fool”, as well as some guest spots on shows like “Blackish, Chicago Med and Crazy Ex Girlfriend.”    

The moment Mercedes found out she was pregnant with Cameron, she knew it would be tough to juggle her career and being a mom but she knew she could do it, and with Sam’s support, she spent the first half of her pregnancy fulfilling her contractual tour and the last two months preparing to be a mom, the moment he was born, at 7 lbs and 2 Ounces, 22 inches long, she went on Hiatus from her career and focused on her family. She wasn’t really domesticated so she had to learn to cook and bake by taking classes, and now 27 months later, she has really come into her own cooking wise and is often very proud of the dinner’s she prepares for her family.   

For the first few years of their marriage they lived in Mercedes three bedroom duplex but with everything they have and want the house is getting smaller and she realized that she wanted Cameron and their future kids to grow up with a yard and being able to ride his bike, enjoy being a kid, all the things she missed out on. Plus they wanted room for when their parents or guests needed a place to stay, so they thought about buying the place next to hers and expanding the yard. It wasn’t until she found out she was pregnant with Twins a few weeks ago, did she tell Sam she wanted to find an actual house.

Mercedes is looking forward to moving into their new home and creating an inviting environment. And with the news of the new baby, both Mercedes Mom and Sam’s mom have planned to come lend a hand in the moving experience which Mercedes is absolutely thrilled about. She can use all the help she can get.

Mercedes feels like she replaced her music career with being a mom, giving it 100 percent and going over and beyond for her family. She still writes and knows eventually she will have to go back to her career but for right now she is loving her freedom. Every Friday night she makes sure she and Sam have date night, to keep the love in their relationship alive. Their marriage is going strong and with the new additions coming to their family she can’t wait for what the future has in store for them

[expurgatedversion]

Self-Rec Fest

Welcome to the Self-Rec Fest, where we encourage authors to celebrate their own works without shame. Fandom: Supernatural. Pairings: Destiel, Jensen Ackles/Misha Collins Warnings may apply, and summaries may be edited from the original.

Summer Blue Skies by @destimushi RPF - Jensen Ackles/Misha Collins. Complete. Rated E. Part 1 of a series.

The mission was to infiltrate. Jensen knew the consequences of capture, and when it happened, he was ready to die for his country. Misha Collins was the master of torture, and it shouldn’t be difficult to hate him, but the interrogator was hot and cold, and Jensen soon found the boundaries between love and hate blurring.

Between the Folds of Submission by destimushi Destiel. Complete. Rated E.

Castiel races against the clock as the killer ups the ante, but Dean—rich, drop-dead gorgeous, and a famously unconventional Dominant to boot—proves to be a distraction he can’t afford. As the danger grows, Castiel finds himself torn between upholding his beliefs and giving in to his desires. Can he resist his urges long enough to find the killer, or will his biology consume him?

Music To His Ears by HollyBlue2 @envydean Destiel. Complete. Rated E. On the way home from work, Castiel hears the lilting tune of a piano and eventually goes to investigate. When he does he finds his mate in Dean Winchester, who rejects him right off the bat, sending Castiel into a debilitating heat.Ending up in hospital, Castiel and Dean finally meet again...

Lazarus Writing by @jemariel Destiel. Complete. Rated E. Castiel is an author struggling to come up with his next novel. Luckily for him, a gift arrives in the mail from his publisher: a fancy new notebook and pen set with a note that promises to “bring new life to your writing”. It’s all fine until Castiel decides to write his grocery list in the back of the book… only to find the items have materialized in the kitchen. So, Castiel is in possession of some freaky magic which could be pretty amazing… if it weren’t for the fact that he just started a new novel in that book and the contents are not something he wants to see in this world.... Five Days in May by Dangerousnotbroken, @kreweofimp Destiel. Complete. Rated E. The unseasonable hurricane wasn’t the only force of nature on the beach that night. Dean counts himself lucky that the beautiful blue-eyed stranger was there to save his life. He never could have anticipated that a nameless one-night stand in a tiny storm-tossed shack would change his entire life. Like Catnip by KreweOfImp Destiel. Complete. Rated E. It's one thing to be pissed off that Cas was up late gaming and didn't come to bed when he said he would. And yeah, Cas pretty much figured there was gonna be some sulking and he was gonna have to do some groveling to make up for it. He maybe even could've foreseen the desire for a little revenge. But did Dean really have to involve the cat? Cumulonimbus by KreweOfImp Destiel. Complete. Rated E. In which Cas watches snow, Dean watches Cas, Sam is a jerk, things get out of hand, and Dean is taken in hand. Written in the Stars by @lunastories Destiel. Complete. Rated M. Castiel, one of the last of the Celestials, descended onto Earth by orders of his garrison leader. What he finds there is the soul he lost long ago, the other part of him that he'd been searching for.

Dean was a normal guy, living his life and trying to take care of his errant researcher brother. When his brother asks him for a favor, claiming that an alien wants to speak to him, he's of course skeptical.

He didn't expect that meeting to change the course of his entire life, throwing him into a war that he wasn't prepared for. Love me to Death by LunaStories Destiel. Complete. Rated M. There once was a man who feared Death. He feared him so much, he tried to seek immortality but his efforts were in vain. Eventually, he learned to love Death and everything he represented. This is the story of a mortal and a god and their love for each other. Mermen and Mistletoe by @robotsnchicks Destiel. Complete. Rated T. When Cas draws his long-term crush's name for the office gift exchange, he is determined to find the perfect gift. Unfortunately his co-worker Meg has an unconventional suggestion. Signs Point To Yes by robotsnchicks Destiel. Complete. Rated G. A series of coincidences conspire to remind Dean of his New Year's resolution—To ask Cas out. Lifestyles of the Weird and Sexy by robotsnchicks Destiel. Complete. Rated E.Dean's roommate Castiel is a pretty weird dude. He's also hot as hell and Dean might have a bit of a crush on him.The problem is Cas might be a witch. And finding out the truth isn't as easy as Dean thought it would be. I Don't Know Why by @saltnhalo Destiel. Complete. Rated E. Dean gets home from a long job to find a note on his front step. He knows exactly who it's from and what it means; it promises fun and danger and a fucking good time, and there's no way he can turn down this invitation. He can never say no to the Angel. Roll With It by saltnhalo Destiel. Complete. Rated E. For two years, Dean’s been slaving away beneath his boss – many label him a secretary, but he fucking hates that and feels like it only applies to someone wearing a pencil skirt, so he insists on his title of Executive Assistant. And for what? In the vain hope that one day he’ll manage to become an editor for Sandover Publishing, and that he’ll see the manuscript that he’s slaved over since college finally realized in print. That’s the dream, anyway. Right now, he’s fucking late. From Grace and Uniform by saltnhalo, thepopeisdope Destiel. Complete. Rated E. When FBI agent Dean Winchester was first assigned to the Ghost’s case, he was expecting it to be the same as any other serial killer hunt--frustrating dead ends, a trail of bodies, unending paperwork. What he wasn’t expecting was for it to be interrupted by a mysterious alpha calling himself Cas, knowing far too much about him and offering up not just a lead, but concrete information on his mother’s killer. As the two set off in search of justice for Mary Winchester and the countless other victims of Azazel Masters, Dean struggles to come to grips with himself. Despite his whirlwind attraction to Cas, he knows that exposing himself to his colleagues as an omega instead of the beta he pretends to be would be a mistake. Nothing can happen between the two of them; not without Dean losing everything he knows. Waiting in the Wings by @seraphwrites Destiel. Complete. Rated T. Castiel an injured hunter stumbles into a town and meets an angel who may just have be having the same rotten luck he is. Written for the Hey, Sweetheart 2018 challenge. spinning (series) by @reallyelegantsharkfish Destiel. Complete. Rated T-M. “Listen up!” Dean hollers, louder than necessary in the small space. “We are spinnin’ this bottle, and then we’re going to do some kissin’! Happy New Year!” suckerfish (series) by sharkfish Destiel. Complete. Rated E. At some point in the last couple of months, Dean became friends with the monster in the lake. traveling light by sharkfish Destiel. Complete. Rated E. Cas is, impossibly, far more gorgeous in person, and he’s taller than Dean expected, and he moves with this casual grace that makes Dean’s brain short circuit. So Dean thinks he probably looks a little like a deer in the headlights when Cas catches his eyes from the door of the restaurant. He breaks out into a smile, the full, wide one that never came out in his pictures, and Dean actually goes weak in the knees. “Cas,” Dean says. “Hello, Dean,” Cas says. Sealed lips. Tied hands. by @sternchenchas Destiel. Complete. Rated G. Dean Winchester doesn't look forward to his first day of school, but it's not because of your usual teenager problems. He would be glad if he had to deal with dates, grades and rumors about his love life. Instead, he struggles even to communicate. In a world where everyone talks in sign language, his hands are tied. He's a happer. One of those weird people who have a hard time figuring out what others say, and can't express what they want to tell. But one good deed might save him because he helps Castiel Novak. A boy who might be just as different and weird as Dean. A boy who understands even when Dean's lips are sealed. Reality of Dreams by sternchencas Destiel. Complete. Rated E. Dean Winchester has been living a boring life. At least until his brother is missing, the police think he has something to do with it, and a group of people who call themselves 'Liberi Somniorum' and live in an underground bunker ask him to join them so they can teach him how to use his dreaming abilities. As if that isn't bad enough, the police also took his car and then there's this guy in a trenchcoat who's guarding him, and some dark secret. Dean does his best to convince himself it's a dream. But somehow, sometimes, dreams can be very real, and this time, he just can't wake up. Porch Light by @surlybobbies Destiel. Complete. Rated N/A. Before he could think too much about it, Dean had reached over his duffel bag and skated his knuckles across Cas’s cheek, just once, before dropping his hand and his gaze. “I’ll leave the porchlight on for you,” he had mumbled. (Dean and Cas reunite in Lawrence after meeting in Boston 6 months prior.) Brambles by surlybobbies Destiel. Complete. Rated T. “You like the dirty mechanic look, Cas?” Dean says, winking.Cas steps back to let him in. “Not particularly.” Dean’s grin falls. He swipes an arm over his sweaty forehead. “Well, get used to it, bud, ‘cause I’m your neighborhood dirty mechanic on the days I’m not the neighborhood drunken arsonist.” Criminality by surlybobbies Destiel. Complete. Rated T. In which Dean accidentally breaks into and falls asleep in Cas's car, and Cas accidentally kidnaps the stranger who had been eyeing him all night at the bar.

[elizabeth-johanna-blog]

Most days, I just spend my time wondering how to keep myself calm and seeming to be fine. Inside though, my mind is racing and I have so many thoughts that have nowhere to go. I thought maybe typing them out would help slow things down in there, so I’m giving it a whirl.

A LONG TIME AGO, a minor accident happened that eventually caused major changes in my family’s lives. My mom tripped over our dog and fell down the stairs while doing laundry. It seems like a small thing, right? Someone falls and they get a bump or scrape or two, but they bounce back quickly. Not in this case. My mom had some back pain afterwards, but being the stubborn person she is, she put it off and thought it would go away. When it didn’t, she told our family doctor about it. He thought, “oh, probably just some muscle spasms, these pills should help.” If I could go back in time for anything, it would be for this moment and tell him to do a MRI or CAT scan instead, first. “These pills should help.” It wasn’t an antibiotic, or something little. No. It was narcotics. You know, they give them to people for temporary relief of pain of any sort. But did you know, that when some people take them thinking it’s an innocent way of feeling better, it ruins their lives instead? We didn’t either. I guess the doctor didn’t, either. My mom took them, and they made her feel “better.” And so she kept taking them. And they kept making her feel “better.” And then they would wear off. And she thought she needed them to feel “better.” But did SHE need them? No. Her brain did. Her brain thought, “woah, these things are awesome, they block out all of reality.” And so, the more my mom took them, the more her brain pushed reality back and out and welcomed a new world of clouds, bitterness, regret, unwillingness. It definitely wasn’t a world that my family was used to, so when my mom starting bringing it out, we didn’t like it. Not at all. But my mom seemed to think it was better. With her already several health problems, she started to accumulate more and more. And as she accumulated them, she didn’t feel a need to take care of them all properly. Here she is, being a home for all of these health problems, and she isn’t even giving them the proper care they need. She just kept taking these pills thinking they were a cure for everything. And so, on and on. She would be in and out of the hospital. She would be withdrawing from these pills that she would take too many of in a day, and run out before they could be replenished for her and her brain and her new world inside of her. Years and years go by. She loses her teeth. She spends weeks at a time in a hospital. She argues with doctors and nurses. She sends beams of unhappiness to everyone around her, but especially to my dad. Her partner in life slowly became her enemy. Everything he did was wrong. Everything he didn’t do was a problem. I think the pills planted a seed in her brain telling her that this man is a monster, when in reality, he’s a saint. He always made time in his busy day of driving 3+ hours round trip to and from his job, to make sure she had company. All while keeping his job, to make sure she can receive all this help from the hospitals, and still be able to get her pills. I know it seems like, oh, someone is sick so they should be in the hospital. Well, if it were that easy, maybe she would be better by now, but she isn’t. In the course of 10+ years, she spent the better portion of it making herself sick when she ran out of her pills, so that she could go into the hospital where they would have to give her all of her medicine. It seems smart, doesn’t it? You run out of “medicine” you just go to a place where they’ll make sure you get it. All while this is happening, her body is starting to fight against the pills. Her insides are dying. Her brain is being warped. Her heart is weakening. In October 2015, the biggest fight in her body came to light. She was very sick at home, so my dad decided she should go to the hospital. He took her there, and shortly after a whole whirlwind of things happened, unexpectedly of course. She was immediately admitted to the ICU because of all the blood work and tests they ran. Her whole body was under attack, from itself. The doctors knew something was very wrong but they couldn’t find out what exactly it was. So they began running any test they could think of. After deciding to a colonoscopy, they found (most of) it. All of the tissue in her stomach was gray, and dead which was causing a lot of bacteria in her blood, which was causing infections all over her body. Her colon wasn’t functioning properly, so... in a not-so-polite way, she was full of shit. Which was also getting out, into her body, which as anyone can imagine, is NOT good for your body. So, with all of this, they had to remove the entire left side of her colon, along with her entire rectum. This left her with a colostomy bag. After this surgery though, came a heartbreaking moment for our family. She began bleeding internally and came very close to leaving us. The doctors called my dad back from the waiting room, and asked if he knew if she would want him to sign a DNR (do not resuscitate) form. As we all remember her saying, “if I have to live off of machines, I don’t want to.” So, he signed it. And we all braced for the worst that could happen and anxiously waited to hear how her second emergency surgery would end. She pulled through, as always. She is one strong woman, that is for sure. After getting through the surgeries, we knew she would have a very long road of recovery ahead of her. Once her body was bouncing back, and she no longer needed a breathing tube, or dialysis she was able to start getting help on her physical therapy and speech therapy and just getting back to life. But... is that what she wanted? I know she hates being sick like she is, but she has a very odd way of showing it. She got home from the rehabilitation center and really seemed like she wanted this second shot that she was given. She would wake up early, eat breakfast, get dressed, do her exercises. It was nice seeing this slight gleam of hope come from her. Until... it ended. She slowly began to go back to her old habits. Sitting in bed, watching TV, getting grumpy towards us when we tried helping her. So eventually, she went back downhill. She would run of her pills. She would throw temper tantrums, and go back to the hospital. After about 6 months, this whole taking too many pills and running out thing caught up to her. She ran out, and we all knew it. I know as soon as she runs out because I can just see that look on her face and hear the sound in her voice that lets me know, we’re in for a rough couple of days. So in August, after her birthday, she ran out. She didn’t want to go to the hospital, so she thought taking a handful of Benadryl would help. Well, all it did was send her to the hospital. Where she had a heart attack, and needed a stent put in her heart. After that, came a stroke, and then another. As I was rushing to the hospital as the stroke was happening, I didn’t know what to expect. I was terrified, especially since I was going alone. I didn’t know if I could handle seeing my mom in that condition. When I got there, I found out she was being transferred to a bigger campus for proper care. After all of this, we decided, we need to get her help of these pills are going to kill her. We decided we should hold onto them and only give her a few days at a time, to keep her from running out and doing something stupid, thinking it’ll help her. Well, she didn’t like it. She would constantly beg and yell at us for pills. She would get physical with us when we wouldn’t give them to her. She would say she was leaving the house. This whole thing, has turned into a nightmare. She is so mean to us, especially my dad. She has punched him countless times, gave him a black eye. All because her brain is so warped from these pills. Oh wait, I forgot something very important. In February, it was a time where my dad was just sick of her being so difficult about someone else holding her pills that she just got to hold them herself. And of course, with the lower doses she was given, she ran out. And this time, maybe because her doses were cut back and her body was probably still withdrawing from all those high doses, she thought, she couldn’t live this way anymore. So. She got up. She got a few knives from the kitchen. She found a sharp one, and cut her wrists, and cut into her stomach. She tried to kill herself because she didn’t have these pills to make her escape her reality and make her feel “better.” So. My dad woke up, on the morning of a winter storm, to find my mom with cuts in her, and a bloody knife in her hands. She was conscious, but not all there. She was taken to the hospital, where she was admitted onto the 6th floor. After a couple weeks, they decided to let her come home. She was given new depression medicine, anxiety medicine, to help her. In my experience through all of this, no amount of medicine is going to help someone unless they WANT it to. She doesn’t want her life to change. She seems to want to be sick, and get help from us, instead of helping herself. I have sympathy for my mom. I always will. But it is too hard to try and help someone that just doesn’t want it. Someone that just sits and thinks back on all the things that happened in life and didn’t turn out the way they wanted it to. Instead of moving forward, and trying to make themselves a better, healthier, happier person, they just live in the past and try to get everyone around them to get stuck there, too. All in all, I think about all of this a lot. I think of things she has said and done to me and my family, and how much I hate it. But, I am also seeing that, as much as I love and care about her, she chose those pills over us many, many times. And I know my real mom, the mom that used to laugh and do fun things is in there somewhere, but after waiting 10+ years for her to come back, and see no sign of her, it just is hard to wait and wait and wait.

I don’t know what to do. All I know is, I don’t want to end up unhappy and unhealthy and bitter. I want to build a life with someone I love, and live a life that I can be happy with when it’s over.

// abrupt ending because I feel like if I don’t stop typing now, I never will. //

[dfroza]

Today’s reading in the ancient book of Psalms and Proverbs

for friday, may 1 of 2020 with Psalm 1 and Proverbs 1, accompanied by Psalm 44 for the 44th day of Spring and Psalm 122 for day 122 of the year

Book 1

The Genesis Psalms

Psalms of man and creation

The Tree of Life

[Psalm 1]

God’s blessings follow you and await you at every turn:

when you don’t follow the advice of those who delight in wicked schemes,

When you avoid sin’s highway,

when judgment and sarcasm beckon you, but you refuse.

For you, the Eternal’s Word is your happiness.

It is your focus—from dusk to dawn.

You are like a tree,

planted by flowing, cool streams of water that never run dry.

Your fruit ripens in its time;

your leaves never fade or curl in the summer sun.

No matter what you do, you prosper.

For those who focus on sin, the story is different.

They are like the fallen husk of wheat, tossed by an open wind, left deserted and alone.

In the end, the wicked will fall in judgment;

the guilty will be separated from the innocent.

Their road suddenly will end in death,

yet the journey of the righteous has been charted by the Eternal.

The Book of Psalms, Poem 1 (The Voice)

Instead you thrill to God’s Word,

you chew on Scripture day and night.

You’re a tree replanted in Eden,

bearing fresh fruit every month,

Never dropping a leaf,

always in blossom.

The Book of Psalms, Poem 1:2-3 (The Message)

[Proverbs 1]

I, Solomon, David’s son and Israel’s king, pass on to you these proverbs—a treasury of wisdom—

So that you would recognize wisdom and value discipline;

that you would understand insightful teaching

And receive wise guidance to live a disciplined life;

that you would seek justice and have the ability to choose what is right and fair.

These proverbs teach the naive how to become clever;

they instruct the young in how to grow in knowledge and live with discretion.

The wise will pay attention to these words and will grow in learning,

and the discerning will receive divine guidance,

And they will be able to interpret the meaning of a proverb and a puzzle,

the twists and turns in the words of the wise and their riddles.

Let us begin. The worship of the Eternal One, the one True God, is the first step toward knowledge.

Fools, however, do not fear God and cannot stand wisdom or guidance.

So, my son, pay attention to your father’s guidance,

and do not ignore what your mother taught you—

Wear their wisdom as a badge of honor and maturity,

as fine jewelry around your neck.

My son, should your less honorable peers pressure you to do what is wrong,

you should be strong enough not to go along.

If they should say,

Evildoers: Come on! Everyone, hide and let’s wait to see whom we can beat to a pulp.

We’re going to jump some unsuspecting chumps for no reason at all.

We’ll have our way with them, and when we’re through, there will be nothing left,

as if their bodies were swallowed whole by the grave’s dark pit.

We’ll take whatever we want—all their wealth and their fancy clothes—

and when we’re through, we’ll have piles of their treasure for our own.

You have to join us; forget about God.

We’re going to rake in the goods, and we’ll share all we take!

My son, do not join them;

keep well away from their violent, destructive paths.

For they run right away, every time, to do wrong,

and they are thirsty for blood.

You see, it makes no sense to bait the net and set the trap

while the bird is watching,

But these hiding in the shadows and waiting to spill innocent blood

are really just hastening their own destruction!

By giving in to their sinful desires,

they set themselves up to be ambushed.

This is what happens to everyone who tries to profit by violence;

violence will eventually rob them of their very lives.

There’s another voice in town.

It belongs to Lady Wisdom, who calls out in the street.

She cries out in the town square,

At the city gates, in the noisy city streets,

you can hear her speaking over the racket.

Lady Wisdom: You simple, naive people, how long will you love your feeble ways?

You simpletons, how long will you enjoy making fun of what you don’t understand?

You fools, how long will you hate learning what truly matters?

Turn to me and receive my gentle correction;

Watch and I will pour out my spirit on you;

I will share with you my wise words in order to redirect your lives.

You hear, but you have refused to answer my call.

My hands reached out, but no one noticed.

All my advice, all my correction, all have been neglected—

you wanted nothing of them.

So I will be the laughter you hear when misfortune comes, and it will come.

I will be the mocking sound when panic grips you—

When panic comes like a stormy blast,

when misfortune sweeps in like a whirlwind,

when sorrow and anguish weigh you down.

This is when they will call on me, but I will not respond;

they will be frantic to find me, but they won’t be able.

Because they despised knowledge of my ways,

and they also refused to respect and honor the Eternal,

Because they rejected my advice

and turned down my correction,

They will surely get what’s coming to them:

they’ll be forced to eat the fruit of their wicked ways;

they’ll gorge themselves on the consequences of their choices.

You see, it’s turning away from me that brings death to the simple,

and it’s self-satisfaction that destroys the fools.

But those who listen to me now will live under divine protection;

they can rest knowing they are out of harm’s way.

The Book of Proverbs, Chapter 1 (The Voice)

[Psalm 44]

For the Pure and Shining One, by the prophetic singers of Korah’s clan

A contemplative poem for instruction

We’ve been hearing about this, God,

all our lives.

Our fathers told us the stories

their fathers told them,

How single-handedly you weeded out the godless

from the fields and planted us,

How you sent those people packing

but gave us a fresh start.

We didn’t fight for this land;

we didn’t work for it—it was a gift!

You gave it, smiling as you gave it,

delighting as you gave it.

You’re my King, O God—

command victories for Jacob!

With your help we’ll wipe out our enemies,

in your name we’ll stomp them to dust.

I don’t trust in weapons;

my sword won’t save me—

But it’s you, you who saved us from the enemy;

you made those who hate us lose face.

All day we parade God’s praise—

we thank you by name over and over.

But now you’ve walked off and left us,

you’ve disgraced us and won’t fight for us.

You made us turn tail and run;

those who hate us have cleaned us out.

You delivered us as sheep to the butcher,

you scattered us to the four winds.

You sold your people at a discount—

you made nothing on the sale.

You made people on the street,

urchins, poke fun and call us names.

You made us a joke among the godless,

a cheap joke among the rabble.

Every day I’m up against it,

my nose rubbed in my shame—

Gossip and ridicule fill the air,

people out to get me crowd the street.

All this came down on us,

and we’ve done nothing to deserve it.

We never betrayed your Covenant: our hearts

were never false, our feet never left your path.

Do we deserve torture in a den of jackals?

or lockup in a black hole?

If we had forgotten to pray to our God

or made fools of ourselves with store-bought gods,

Wouldn’t God have figured this out?

We can’t hide things from him.

No, you decided to make us martyrs,

lambs assigned for sacrifice each day.

Get up, God! Are you going to sleep all day?

Wake up! Don’t you care what happens to us?

Why do you bury your face in the pillow?

Why pretend things are just fine with us?

And here we are—flat on our faces in the dirt,

held down with a boot on our necks.

Get up and come to our rescue.

If you love us so much, Help us!

The Book of Psalms, Poem 44 (The Message)

[Psalm 122]

Jerusalem

A song of the stairway, by King David

I was overjoyed when they said,

“Let’s go up to the house of the Lord.”

And now at last we stand here, inside the very gates of Jerusalem!

O Jerusalem, you were built as a city of praise,

where God and man mingle together.

This is where all the tribes of Yahweh are required

to come and worship him.

This is where the thrones of kings have been established

to rule in righteousness;

even King David ruled from here.

Pray and seek for Jerusalem’s peace,

for all who love her will prosper!

O Jerusalem, may there be peace for those

who dwell inside your walls

and prosperity in your every palace.

I intercede for the sake of my family and friends

who dwell there, that they may all live in peace.

For the sake of your house, Yahweh

I will seek the welfare and prosperity of Jerusalem.

The Book of Psalms, Poem 122 (The Passion Translation)

to be accompanied by these lines in The Voice:

Ask heaven to grant peace to Jerusalem:

“May those who love you prosper.

O Jerusalem, may His peace fill this entire city!

May this citadel be quiet and at ease!”

It’s because of people—my family, friends, and acquaintances—

that I say, “May peace permeate you.”

And because the house of Eternal One, our God, is here, know this:

I will always seek your good!

The Book of Psalms, Poem 122:6-9 (The Voice)

[ouraidengray4]

6 Ways to Cut Back at Work and Be Instantly Happier

I’ve always been busy and achievement-oriented; I was the college kid with a high GPA, multiple on-campus jobs, and a full course load. When I graduated, it was only natural that my industriousness would continue into adult life, but I was still struggling to make ends meet, so I started working more and more hours. I relocated to a larger city with more opportunities, took on two part-time jobs—one an overnight shift—and redoubled my efforts.

It wasn’t long before this perseverance became a real problem. For two years, I had a near-constant headache and neglected my relationship. When my partner and I went out for a dinner date, I was unable to leave work behind—I was always concerned that a client might email me. I stopped doing things I loved, including spending time outside, reading for fun, and connecting with friends. Finally, I reached a breaking point: I physically couldn’t keep up with the pace I’d been setting for myself and started missing deadlines. I was constantly sick. I realized I’d lost control and finally admitted that I had a problem... even as peers continued to compliment me for my ability to work so much.

It took me months to start changing course. Like many in my generation, I still had six-figure student loan debt, but when I was being honest with myself, I knew that stability would elude me until I changed my habits to make them more sustainable.

You might also like READ

Finally, nearly a year after I first began to flounder, I'm in the process of making some concrete changes, so I can get more enjoyment out of time I spend doing something other than work. Here's what I'm doing… if you're going through something similar, these tips might help you too.

1. Put self-care on the schedule.

For people battling work addiction, any time spent outside of work can be anxiety-inducing, but self-care is vitally important. It's still hard for me to relax, so for now, I’m focusing on activities like horseback riding that demand my full attention, so I can't get distracted. When I’m riding, if I don’t focus on the moment, my ride can be less than enjoyable at best, and dangerous at worst. I'm still working toward enjoying unstructured time—right now it makes me very uncomfortable to have nothing on the schedule—but my hope is that by getting more comfortable with not working, I can get more comfortable with actual leisure.

2. Learn to unplug.

A big part of learning how to be engaged in the world outside of my work has been to commit to other activities and to hold myself accountable, so I'm spending a minimum of one hour per week unplugged—my phone is not allowed to come with me on a date, a hike, a class, or any other activity. During that time, I just can't work. My goal is to eventually be in a place where I don't actually need to schedule that time and to learn how to push work completely out of my mind when there's nothing I can do about it.

3. Learn to change the way you talk to yourself.

For me, the hardest part about addressing my addiction to work is the whirlwind of feelings every time I work… and every time I try to take a step back. Like most people in this world, my financial situation makes it impossible for me to go cold turkey, so it is crucial that I have help learning to manage my emotions. The biggest struggle I have is feeling guilty whenever I take time for myself. I have a hard time focusing on activities that are important to non-work-related parts of my life.

My first goal in therapy is to learn to deal with the guilt. We discuss where it comes from, and I'm learning to change the way I talk to myself. While I still often find myself thinking things like, “You’re being lazy and wasting time. You could be working and earning money right now,” or “You’re broke! How can you afford to just sit around doing nothing?” I'm actively working on interrupting those thoughts with new ones like, “You are not doing this alone. Let your partner help,” and “No one can work 24 hours a day. You are not being lazy by letting your mind rest.” One of the most important things to remember is that taking real breaks actually helps me be more productive when I am working.

4. Recruit supporters.

One of the most isolating aspects of work addiction is that being hard-working and industrious is seen as virtuous, even when it’s out of control. There are always people complimenting my ability to focus for long hours. It’s nice to feel admired, but these people unintentionally reinforce my addiction instead of helping me change habits. When I decided to make a change, I talked to my partner and my mother about what I was dealing with, and about what I was trying to do. I asked them to help me hold myself accountable for taking time to do other things. And they’ve been doing it. They remind me that the work will still be there when I come back, that my bank account is doing OK, and that taking a break will help me be more productive later. They also commit to coming with me to non-work-related activities if they can make the time.

5. Set firm boundaries.

One of the hardest things is that these days, there are lots (and lots) of tools that allow you to work from almost anywhere, and I was taking full advantage of them. One of the most important steps I've taken is removing my work email account from my phone. If I'm not in my office, I'm not checking or responding. I thought that by making this change, my career would suffer—after all, who would want to work with someone who doesn't get back to them right away? But what I found instead is that it didn't take long for my boss and coworkers to get on board... and even take similar steps themselves.

6. Learn to delegate and say no.

Last year, if my staff had come to me with a big project idea—like securing grant funding to make important changes—I would have tackled the project almost all on my own. I would have researched options, scheduled meetings, written proposals, and sent them out, asking my team for their feedback occasionally and then calling it a collaborative effort.

But last month, when my staff asked what we could do to improve our workplace, I turned the question back on them, asking what they would like to see happen and what they thought was possible. The result so far has been that my employees have come up with some very creative solutions that my company might actually be able to implement, and I'm not overworked trying to make it happen. Instead of taking on the whole project, I offered my mentorship and material support when they needed it, but let them handle any tasks they wanted to try themselves.

I still struggle with wanting to take it all on, and I find myself resisting putting too much time into projects that really belong in someone else’s hands, but I keep reminding myself that letting them do their thing is giving my staff ownership over our workplace, and showing them that I have confidence in their abilities. The sky is not falling. In fact, it's been great—both my staff and I are thriving.

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