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#every time i hear this song i lose my fucking mind
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MY KINGDOM FOR A KISS UPON HER SHOULDER
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interstellix · 2 years
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can we talk abt 0x1=lovesong ty and pls, like txt isn't among my ults ults but i love it and it means an odd lot to me even tho idek why
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spectersinthesnow · 2 years
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jesus. seeing videos of deafheaven performing DREAM HOUSE in sweden last night and the entire audience is just like 🧍🏻‍♂️fucking scandinavians……..
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pears-trinkets · 5 months
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#idk what it was but last year there was this weird wave of ONLY COLONIZER RACISTS COMPLAIN ABOUT THEIR NEIGHBORS NOISE tl#it almost made me leave tumblr for good i think some people saw my complete breakdown over it#because yeah complaining about loud foot steps at night might sound dumb to you but im literally losing my mind in this house#but everyone on here was so quick to jump on the THATS PSYCHOPATH BEHAVIOR WHEN YOU LISTEN TO YOUR NEIGHBORS FOOTSTEPS#like autistic people reblogged this without any nuance#like taking sensory and auditory issues aside ?? it fucking sucks!!!!!!!! i dont want to be able to listen to the whole life of my neighbors#and its not their fault our house is made out of fucking cardboard & we all got scamed bc they put fancy expensive floors in w/o insulation#but like my neighbors are out here SCREAMING at 11 pm and not even thinking about trying to be mindful and respectful of others#i literally just stood frozen in like a trauma response in front of my neighbors door because they invited a bunch of people over#and screamed karaoke like theyre about to die#like SCREAMED screamed on a thursday night#and i talked to them before several times and they are sooo sorry every time but still do it regularly#and i dont even share a wall with them and i can hear them screaming and can make out every song theyre singing#like i love karaoke i get it but dont act surprised when i tell you for the 3rd time that its loud when you FUCKING SCREAM AT NIGHT???#i literally begged the apartment company to hang up an info sheet about noise bc the house rules and the law say no loud noise after 10pm#and they put it up yesterday and now people are screaming#i was unable to ring their door bell for a couple of minutes bc i just could not understand how they were screaming asif theyre in a stadium#i havent slept all week because every night someone on the complete oposite of the house under me was playing drums every night#i know life sucks i know the only time we get to ourselves sometimes is at night but????? you cant just whip out drums at night???#just because you want to or dont get to otherwise???#and its not even a cultural thing?? because many countries have the same night time noise rules as germany?#i know its funny to poke fun at germans for being rule loving stoic and how they have smth up their ass and haha but like china has them too#i would love for life to be a big big party but my life is having to get up for work in a couple of hours and i have to work the front desk#which on its own shoves me into a meltdown of having to talk to people and get the phone like every 2 minutes#but i havent slept all week#i havent slept properly the last 5 years#and i have been trying sleeping pills and everything#now im just too groggy to form proper sentences when i have to talk to neighbors when theyre loud and they think im high#people think im crazy either way because to make sure where the noise is coming from i have to walk through all the corridors of 7 floors#and people always see me and to make it less weird i talk to them but that only makes it more weird
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atinysuh · 7 months
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ateez and their favorite sex positions + explained
yunho, jongho: reverse cowgirl - ok hear me out, imagine yunho guiding the movements of your ass with his huge hand as you bounce on his dick while you look back over your shoulders to watch his expressions. he thinks its so hot to watch you performing on top of him that you almost can see the sparkles on his eyes. he usually let you ride him like this when he knows you had a long ass day at work or college or both and you need to take the stress out of you, so he offers his dick for you to do whatever you want because he just wanna make you feel good. on the other side… jongho also LOVES this position since he can watch your curves. his favorite body part on you is your thighs and the tattoos on it so every time he has the chance to see them bouncing on his cock he’ll take it. he’ll just relax his head on his hands and bite his lips while enjoying his girl. and you also love his thick thighs so you two are even. phew… he’s so fucking hot.
yeosang, mingi: you on top - yeosang loves leaving love bites on your neck and squeezing your waist while you ride him. out of all the girls he has dated in his life you’re definitely the only one who knows how to ride him RIGHT. because let’s be honest, my man’s got a big dick and you can take 100% of him and that’s one of the numerous reasons he fell in love with you at the first place. you kinda got the sauce. he also loves to feel your sweet vanilla cherry scent, he thinks is very sexy, so be careful because sometimes he can get drunk of you! he just place his face in the crook of your neck as you ride him and closes his eyes and stays there guiding your hips, like yunho, but in this case by the waist. okay and mingi… well, mingi is something else. he completely loves sucking on your nipples when you’re on top of him, hands on your ass spanking every now and then to remind you he’s the only one in the world who can bottom you out like that. he kinda asserts some dominance without even noticing and you can’t help it but call out his name every time you go up and down his dick. also, has a huge size kink.
san: BACKSHOTS - 6 words. on the way by jhené aiko. this song is SO choi san coded, every time i hear that “booty clapping from the backshots while we watch porn on the laptop” verse san’s the first person that comes to my mind. we all know he loves a big thick curvy ass that he can spank whenever he pleases. also “inhale the smoke while you stroke inside it” makes me literally malfunction since my biggest guilty pleasure is san getting high and passing the blunt to you while he breaks your back. if i could dedicate one song to one man it would be on the way to san because oh my god i could spend hours talking about this topic but imma stop before i pass out.
seonghwa: face off - we all know seonghwa’s the romantic type… but also the freak type. he likes it when you two are seated at the end of the bed or on the couch or even on the kitchen chair and have you like this, on top of him, facing him. as i said, when you’re fucking in the kitchen, for example, he usually put his elbow on the table behind him and expect you to ride his dick but sometimes it can get a little bit hard for you to keep a steady pace in this position so he loses his patience and quickly switch positions. you’re now laying on the kitchen counter. we also know he’s a worshipper, so he’ll make you feel so loved in his arms even tho he’s fucking the soul out of you. well, love and affection is something you’ll always receive when it comes to having a relationship with seonghwa whether is fwb, a date, a one night stand or a marriage… but he’ll also fuck you HARD and when i say hard i MEAN IT because we’re talking about a fucking aries here and as an aries myself i know exactly what goes on on his mind when it comes to sex.
hongjoong: missionary - still talking about zodiac signs, for those who don’t know, hongjoong’s a scorpio and girl let me tell you about scorpios… ma’am they are another type of freak, like, they literally invented freak, to me they are sex gods. and even tho this is a common sex position doesn’t mean hongjoong will make it ordinary. he’s very possessive so he wants to make sure that you know you’re HIS and his only and he does that by pinning both of your wrists with one hand while he chokes your neck with the other. sex with him is always pleasurable, he’ll satisfy you 200% of the time, overwhelm you even. but you can’t never get enough of him. also, he likes to hear it when you say that your pussy is his for him to please and your body is his for him to touch and that you belong to him. his moto is saying that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you because he couldn’t stand the thought of somebody else touching your body. i love hongjoong so much.
wooyoung: spoon - OK… i see wooyoung fucking you in a spoon position and it can be any type, with your leg up, down, kissing your neck, grabbing your breasts, chocking you, biting your lobe teasing you, but as long as it is in a spoon position. ooooh he loves the way you bite your bottom lip and do that crying expression with your eyebrows when you tell him to slow down and he just gives you a sassy smirk and says nothing but starts fucking you ROUGHER. you can barely open your eyes to look at his hungry eyes looking back at you because it’s rolling with pleasure. all you can do is whine and not even when he cums he’ll stop, he likes overstimulating you AND him.
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chlorinecake · 25 days
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HELLO
Please PLEASE make a fic about the songs church- chase Atlantic!!
It's my latest obsession, next to enha ofc
leading you on | l.hs
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♱ plot: from the shy boy you first met at church camp who your parents once adored to their biggest fuckboy nightmare, you and heeseung reconnect on an online platform where you became a popular streaming duo together, leading to some steamy (and eventually forbidden) connections between you two…
loser!streamer!heeseung x fem!streamer!reader
♱ contains: SLOW BURN, swearing, sneaking out, mentions of bulges (multiple times), oral and fingering (f. r.), slight corruption kink, y/n stripping in front of a large audience (on camera), unprotected sex + virginity loss, y/n deliberately disobeying her parents, angst-ish, ft. other kpop idols, roughly 7k words
a/n: this is my first time writing a one shot all about Heeseung so hopefully I did our favorite loser boy some justice in this fic... have fun reading!
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Heeseung. He was always just so... flirty with you.
Not emotionally, that is, but physically.
Leaving lingering touches on your thigh during Bible study, whispering dangerously close to your ear in that bedroom voice of his, or texting you random pictures during the day with his bulge obvious in almost every single one.
Two little voices battled in the back of your mind whenever you were around him, one voice wanting him to take things further while the other found it strange how he did such things so shamelessly.
The boy's got sex written all over him, your friends would warn alongside your Christ-converted step-sister Giselle who'd had her fair share of 'guys like Heeseung' in the past.
But you didn't see him that way. Despite his flirty tendencies, you figured those were just attributes that made him who he is.
Who you've always loved him to be.
However, those Holy, Holy, God Almighty church days were long gone by now, being no more than a distant ninth grade memory to you and most of everyone else who attended back then.
Everyone except Lee Heeseung, who could never shake his adolescent infatuation with you... ____, the girl who accepted his flaws and eventually stole his heart.
You and Heeseung reconnected a few years later by chance, the same day of your one year anniversary on your streaming channel.
Initially, your content consisted of one-hour long broadcasts where you'd just talk with random strangers, hearing out their problems and giving righteous advice.
However, Heeseung became a recurrent visitor on your streams, coaxing you to speak on topics more interesting than whether its modest to wear glam makeup or if kissing should be saved for marriage.
Your channel amassed a whopping 20,000 new followers in the first month of Heesung partnering with you, and its part of what led him to becoming an anticipated guest to your growing fanbase.
A dynamic duo, some commenters would call you two... and much to your parents chagrin, at that.
Off camera, things were the same.
You and Heeseung had grown closer than ever, sacrificing sleep to text each other all night, doing fuck-all on your web streams for hours, and even considering meeting up in person for a broadcast after he shared with you that he still lived in the city.
But then... something changed.
Or more accurately, your overly controlling mother put her foot down.
|Messaging| 💬
Heeseung: So we're not allowed to hang out together this Friday ?
You: Not alone... and honestly, not on the streams anymore, either...
Heeseung: Don't tell me its bc ur shyyyy
You: Nope… pArEnTs ^^
You'd say your mom had it out to get Heeseung more than your dad ever did, resenting the mere mentioning of his name at weekly church gatherings.
"That daughter of yours has gained quite the audience on social media," one womann would say, "too bad she seems to be losing her Faith to that poor Heeseung boy..."
"Such a shame," another would agree, adding to the heat-bubbles boiling in your mother's blood-
"Our faith teaches forgiveness and kindness," you defended yourself, just as your mom gave you maybe her third lecture this week on why you should cut ties with him.
"It also advises caution and wisdom when it comes to who we allow into our social circles," she hummed back, taking a sip of her morning coffee, red lipstick staining the rim of the white mug, "I'd be no better than a fool to sit here and support this meaningless friendship between you and that... man."
You internally rolled your eyes at her words, thinking of something, anything to say in order to change the subject right now.
"Well, I have plans with some friends from church tonight, if you don't mind-"
"Will Heeseung be there?"
"What? No," you lied, and not for the first time, either.
It helped you to feel less guilt whenever you blamed it on the little voice in your head, "Just me and the girls," you clarified.
"Mhm," she smiled facetiously before continuing, "I'm afraid I still can't trust you to go, though... especially not after that little stunt you pulled online..."
Your hand halted at the kitchen countertop as her words settled in your mind, "What stunt?"
FLASHBACK
It all started with a picture.
A stupid picture you got dared to leak by an anonymous tipper who offered a $1,000 donation in exchange for a steamy photo of Heeseung.
Chelbear03: God, he looks so THICK
Chelsea, one of your viewers said in the streaming chat, practically moaning at the photo of Heeseung, biting her lip as if she could feel him inside her just by looking at the screen.
Chelbear03: PAINFUL 😩
pucca_princxss: Need a tissue for your drool, Sea-Sea? 🧻
Danielle, another fan joked.
Chelbear03: Okay, FIRST of all, I have drool coming from TWO holes rn- Secondly, I'd rather just have him lick it up 😔
Chelsea typed back, a nuance to her words that you couldn't tell was meant to be either comical or serious.
"Lick up what?" a curious voice asked from the screen.
That's when your hand flew to cover your mouth, eyes going wide at the sight of Heeseung coming back into frame after saying he'd be "afk for a bit while showering."
His hair was still a bit damp from what you could tell, a towel draped lazily around his neck as your eyes unfortunately fell to the lump hiding behind his pants.
Oh God-
"N-nothing! Uhm... it's not important," you chuckled dryly, only adding to the awkwardness everyone was starting to feel from behind their screens.
pucca_princxss: OOP speak of the papi-
Chelbear03: Please forgive me, Hee-man 🧎‍♀️ ... bc I am disrespectfully foaming at the mouth as we speak-
Chelbear03 has left the stream
A notification of Chelsea having left the stream popped up in the chat almost immediately after she sent that message.
"What was that all about?," Heeseung smirked with confusion, looking between both you and the server comments displayed on his screen for an answer that never came.
"Fine then, keep your secrets... its not like I can't just rewind the stream highlights anyway," he added, just as you felt frantic emotions overcome you.
"Heeseung, you really don't wanna do that, just let me explain-"
His jaw dropped, not necessarily in shock, but with intrigue, the raunchy photo of his semi-hard cock through his sweatpants being displayed on the screen, right before his glossy deer-like eyes.
The same picture he'd only ever sent to you.
"I guess this is my mini Drake moment then," Heeseung chuckled to himself, a heavy sigh escaping your lips at his fortunately chill reaction.
"I did it for 1k, Heeseung, I'm sorry," you whined, pulling your knees up in your chair before burying your face behind them.
"Don't be... everyone already knows I'm your slut at this point," he said in a deeper voice, making you freeze once again as your eyes shot up to view the screen, almost in denial that such words even left his mouth.
anonymous tipper: worst thousand $$$ I ever spent... how abt I multiply the price by two for a sexy picture of the lady ?
yxstar3ject: ooo, but i was thinking maybe a double feature instead ? would luvvv to see how she treats this little slut of hers 🤭
Heeseung snickered so loud, you almost felt it on your skin, watching his facial expressions change with each suspicious message that filled the chat box, throughly entertaining him
"Guys, cut it out before I end the stream," you giggled shyly, revealing your full face that looked a little less flustered than earlier, "Heeseung isn't my slut either, okay? Just a good friend, I swear..."
pucca_princxss: you two need to stream in the same room one day bc this long distance sexual tension thing is so not the vibe :|
"Maybe one day..." Heeseung's voice faded off as he turned off the lights in his room, getting ready for bed...
"Maybe~~," your mother repeated in a mocking tone at the memory of your "filthy fest" of a stream that day, disgust displayed all over her before she took the last sip of her coffee as if it'd soothe her.
"Hope that refreshed your memory sweetie, but either way, my answer's no. Not with that slut on the streets and especially not without my supervision..."
“If you’re referring to Heeseung with that vulgar comment, I’m sorry to correct you, but it’s not right to just bash him with words like that,” you went on, leaning your elbows over the counter.
“Please, any guy who sends raunchy dick pics, let alone to a girl he’s not even dating, is a slut, ____,” your step-sister Giselle voiced while walking into the kitchen, dressed in athletic wear as she filled up her water canteen with a lemon flavored electrolyte packet, “not to mention those other weird things he says about your relationship on the stream.”
Despite how much your family claimed to dislike Heeseung, they had no problem with bringing him up every five seconds in a conversation.
You glanced at her through a side eye, shaking your head at the fact that she was just eavesdropping on your conversation, “That was hardly a dick pic, and you should know that better than me, Jizz-elle,” you retorted, putting extra emphasis on the first syllable of her old nickname.
“Yeah, real mature, ____… you can slut shame me but not your little online boyfriend?”
“Ladies!,” your mother raised her voice slightly, pursing her lips at the tension built up between you two, “that’s enough of this discussion…”
You noticed the way your mother’s eyes lingered on your step sister for a moment, “And where do you think you’re going?”
“To the gym,” she answered shortly, walking past your mom and out of the kitchen with haste.
You scoffed out loud, “Not gonna interrogate her like you did to me?,” you said, laughing as if humored when it was really just a way to mask how irritated you were.
“No,” your mom said with a delayed reply, “Giselle is not my blood… I must take her word for what she says to avoid conflict with your step-father… you, on the other hand, will—”
“—abide by your rules… got it,” you finished for her, knowing better than to continue going back and forth with her in this matter.
You left the kitchen, going up to your room and plopping yourself on the bed, staring at the ceiling as you entered into a deep thinking space.
One in which you'd strategize on how to successfully sneak out of the house to hang out with Heeseung tonight.
|Messaging| 💬
You: So, you want me to meet you where again ?
Heeseung: Just take a hard right past the first stop sign from your place and a few steps past that one brown house (pls ignore my Dora ass instructions rn 🗿)
You: ok ok 😭, smart tho !! … that way, none of my neighbors will see your car :D
Heeseung: Exactly. U sure u still wanna do this, tho ?
You: Yeah, ofc ! Had enough of my mom nagging me all day ☝️ I need a release BIG time
Heeseung: Haha, okay then ! I’ll see you at 10:30pm
You: Cya ! 🐒
THE LAST TIME you and Heeseung met in person was back when you were both young teenagers, navigating hormones and puberty while aiming to keep God at the center of it all, so to speak.
You didn’t know what to expect from meeting up with him, and especially not under such circumstances.
Still, you had a pretty good feeling that all this trouble wouldn’t be for nothing.
It was currently 10:34pm as you turned off all the lights in your bedroom, wearing an all black outfit to ensure you weren’t seen.
You double checked to see if you had everything with you before leaving: phone, spare cash, and a well-rehearsed story in case you got caught.
Opening your bedroom window, you stuck out a leg, suddenly feeling thankful for your step-dad giving you the bedroom on the first story of his home.
Both your feet were on the floor now, your hands finding the window sill as you closed the window back, careful not to accidentally lock it back so you would be able to get back in later.
You then followed the instructions Heeseung outlined in your texts, walking a few blocks down and taking a right turn once you reached the stop sign.
That’s when you caught sight of his dimly lit side profile under the lights of his car and through the tinted windows.
His eyes were on his phone until your figure blocked the streetlight that shined in his car, drawing his attention to your face as a smile spread over his own.
His eyes lit up like you were the candle to his soul, stepping out of the sleek black car to come around and give you a hug.
“Oh- hi,” you chuckled shyly, hands hesitating to wrap around him before he pulled away, looking you up and down while bracing your shoulders.
“Hi,” he smiled back, “I was just about to text you when you showed up at my window… nice black fit, by the way.”
“Thanks,” you said in a playful voice, watching as he opened the car door for you to get in.
“Would it be wrong of me to assume your panties match, too?,” he asked teasingly, joining you in the vehicle before pulling out of his parked position and cruising out of the neighborhood.
“Wow, you’re really representing this slut persona of yours, huh?” You teased back, putting on your seatbelt.
“Mostly because I can’t help it,” he shrugged, flashing you a smile before looking back at the road, “the fans ship us anyway, so we might as well commit to it, right?”
“Righttt,” you answered suspiciously, poking his thigh before looking back out the window, “gosh, this is crazy…”
“What is?”
“How long we’ve known each other and still happened to maintain a solid friendship despite the distance.”
“Yea,” he agreed, turning down a lane decorated with flowers that somehow still shined in the dark of the night, “We’d be fools to give up this bond we share, though… fools not to explore it further.”
He pulled into his driveway a few minutes later, showing you around his place before leading you to his bedroom, a familiar sight to you thanks to the streams.
“Oh- you’ve still got your monitors and mic set up?,” you asked curiously, noticing how the screen of his computer was on the streaming website.
“You remember what Danielle said on our last live? About us broadcasting in the same room together sometime…” he started shyly, pushing out another gaming chair for you to sit in.
“You really think it’s a good idea to stream right now?,” you rationalized, watching as he joined you in the nearby seat, “I mean, I’m obviously down for it, but what if my mom sees it again? Or Gisel—”
“I’ve already blocked your mom's account, ____, we should be fine,” he smiled, “and… if not… I’ll exchange another photo with your anonymous tipper for some forgiveness cash,” he shrugged, pouty lips making you melt a little inside. "Deal?"
You always knew that Heeseung was cute, but you didn’t think it was possible for him to get any better looking from behind the screen.
“Okay then,” you agreed with a sigh, hoping that your nerves would calm down once the broadcast started.
Almost instantly, 100 viewers joined when Heeseung pressed the “stream” button.
You both began with greeting everyone, trying to get past the chat’s excitement about finally getting to see you two in the same room together.
yxstar3ject: OMFG YALL ACTUALLY DID IT ❗️ this is the moment we’ve all been waiting for 🤧
Chelbear03: holy fucking fuck, how is she so CALM NEXT TO HIM 😩
mrloverl0ver: everyone in favor of them playing truth or strip for us, spam the chat with W’s
pucca_princxss: hoon, you raging perv- WWWWWWWWWW XD
Chelbear03: ✨ W ✨
laylaspapi: W no homo wait, why's my name pink now ;-;
yxstar3ject: I took orange the other day ~ sawwy Jakey W <3
You watched as the chat box started to flood with W's and other random comments, feeling Heeseung sat a hand on your thigh as if to make you feel more comfortable.
"Alright peeps, chill out with the chat spamming, we see it," Heeseung said, laughing off some of the tension, "It's not like you guys didn't get a free show the other day, anyways," he added.
"I don't know..." you started, voice and logic trailing off as more letter W's filled the screen, "it might be fun?"
"____," Heeseung said more seriously this time, "it's a pointless game, y'know? We're honest with the fans... they already know most of secrets, so its silly to do truth or strip..."
"Great. That'll only make it more challenging for them to get our clothes off then," you smiled, suddenly feeling excited about playing, a bit of your competitiveness rubbing off on the initially cautious boy.
"Fine then... we'll do it," Heeseund said, eliciting a few viewers to send gifts to your broadcast, "I'm gonna need a drink for this first, though."
Heeseung was doing a good job of making it seem like he wasn't totally down for this, even though on the inside, he was mostly concerned with making sure you felt comfortable, too.
He left the room for a moment before coming back with two canned cocktails in his grip, placing them on his desk in front of you two.
"I'm guessing you don't drink much," he said, popping open a can of sugary fizz with his teeth while making eye contact with you, "so take it slow with this, yeah?"
"Sure, dad," you joked, taking a sip from the can, hoping that the alcohol would maintain your fleeting confidence, considering that you'd just agreed to strip in front of hundreds of people online.
Chelbear03: alr, first question heheh, starting easy !! :))) when was the last time you got upset and why
Chelsea was the first to initiate this little "truth or strip" questionnaire. Heeseung read the question out loud before humming to himself in thought.
“Hmm... maybe when I overcooked my ramen this morning?”
"Who eats ramen for breakfast?" You asked with a dry laugh.
"Don't judge me because I have good taste, ____," he replied, shoving your thigh with his knee a bit, "and you're dodging the question..."
"Oh- right," you chuckled shyly, thinking of what to say and whether to be honest, until you remembered the consequence would be to remove a piece of clothing.
“It was um... over some stupid things my stepsister was saying about a friend of mine… also this morning...”
"Does that friend so happen to be me by any chance?," Heeseung asked knowingly, giving you a look that you quickly brushed off.
"Moving on, next question!"
anonymous tipper: name the last person you hooked up with $100 donation on the line here, btw... plus someone's modesty 🙈
Oh God, you thought to yourself, dreading how this anonymous tipper knew you'd do almost anything for money.
It was really a bad trait of yours...
"Wow, just jumping to the extremes, aren't we?," Heeseung mumbled between a sip of his drink, the wet condensation drawing your attention to his glistening digits for a quick second.
How were you just now noticing how thick his fingers ar-
laylaspapi: uh oh someone looks nervous ...
pucca_princxss: mission accomplished 👹👹👹
In all honesty, you didn't really have an answer to that question, but to avoid coming off as prudish, you opted to take a pair of clothing off instead, lifting your hips in your seat to pull your pants down.
"____, what the-" Heeseung started before choking a bit on his drink, not just at your sudden boldness, but at the sight of your lace panties hugging the natural curves of your hips, pants getting bunched up at your ankles before you kicked them off under his desk.
yxstar3ject: 😭😭😭😭 DEFINITELY wasn't expecting that, oml-
Chelbear03: your turn, hee 🙏🙏🙏
Something about how frazzled your usually calm and collected best friend became at the simple act of you undressing before him gave you a feeling of exhilaration.
By now, your top barely covered the flesh of your thighs, a few commenters saying things about "wanting to take a bite" before Heeseung cleared his throat, hoping that they'd stop making things worse for him.
"Well uh, I'm not willing to strip a layer just yet, plus I could use the $100, so I'll be honest..."
The chat stalled momentarily as if everyone watching paused in eager anticipation of who and what Heeseung was going to say.
"It's been a while, I'll admit," he chuckled dryly, staring off as if envisioning it behind his sparkly eyes, "but it was around a year and a half ago... with a girl I'd rather not name, but she was a bit older than me..."
"Oh?," you accidentally said out loud, a strange feeling of happiness washing over you now that you knew he hadn't been with any girl since you two met reconnected. You're not sure why this information made you happy... or maybe you're just not ready to admit how you truly feel about him to yourself yet...
"How'd you two meet? Wait- why am I even asking that," you cringed at your own inevitable curiosity, Heeseung taking delight in how his timidness somehow rubbed back off onto you.
"Nah, it's okay... I'm sure the viewers wouldn't mind a little storytime-"
He adjusted his posture in the chair, eyes scanning a few new comments before he spoke, "I met her during my bad boy stage, I guess you could say... we bonded over the fact that we were both born in October until we eventually started smoking together at a friends house of mine every now and then... she and I were both going through some divorce drama with our parents and uh... we thought fucking would be a good emotional outlet? I don't know, maybe it was more of a distraction, I guess..."
Heeseung didn't expect himself to ramble the way he did, but he wanted you to know the main details, even though he left out a few parts for another time and conversation.
Chelbear03: what would it take for me to be that girl ? just for one night 😔
maindancertypeshit: pretty sure Hee just confirmed he's into older girls, Chels ... and ones with daddy issues at that-
You nearly snorted at the sudden comment, up until you realized who the last one came from.
"Excuse me, but what the hell is a toddler doing on this stream?" Heeseung asked sarcastically, obviously referring to Niki.
pucca_princxss: LMAO, looking for his mommy ofc 🤱 (😏)
maindancertypeshit: ayo, wtf??? so dani's allowed but I'm not?? hmph >:{
maindancertypeshit has left the stream
You sighed while laughing slightly, taking a sip of the drink as water droplets now dripped unto your thighs, Heeseung's eyes doing a terrible job of not staring.
"I say we do one more round before ending the stream," you offered, looking at the time as you knew you'd wanna spend more private time with Heeseung before having to run back home.
yxstar3ject: BOOOOOOOO :(
Chelbear03: im too pressed abt riki rn to give a damn bro did NAWT have to dish me the truth like that 😭😭
mrloverl0ver: ok ok, let's make this last question worth it then hmmm ...
Sunghoon typed in thought, just as the bulb in Heeseungs side lamp suddenly shattered, the loss of light coupled with it's piercing sound making you jolt in your seat, half of your canned cocktail spilling on your shirt and chest.
"Shit," Heeseung swore under his breath, happy that none of your drink or any glass from the lightbulb got on his streaming equipment.
That's when he noticed you shivering a bit, the cold liquid contrastingly with the warmth of your body.
"C-can you grab me a towel please?," you asked softly, Heeseung taking the can from your grasp and leaving the room with haste to grab a damp and dry cloth for you.
"Here," he offered when he came back, hooking his hands at the hem of your top and pulling it over your head in one swift movement, making you gasp out loud.
You were now half-naked in front of your best friend, not to mention the tons of people watching from their digital screens.
"Heeseung, what're you-"
He was now taking off his own shirt, holding it in one hand while he wiped your chest down with the cloths he held in the other.
There was something about the way his eyes looked while wiping down your boobs, coming off as romantic despite the awkward nature of the situation.
"Put this on," he whispered so quietly you almost missed it, snaking your head through the head hole of his T-shirt while he flicked the ceiling light on, your mind running in a hundred different directions in this moment.
You're not sure if it had something to do with the alcohol, but your skin still tingled in the spots where his fingertips grazed your flesh... just like old times...
You don't think you ever put on a T-shirt faster in your life, wanting to cover up as fast as you could despite how everyone had already gotten a free show from the both of you.
laylaspapi: B👀BS ?!?!? caught in 4k? just like that !?!??!????
mrloverl0ver: guess that means the games over now since y'all started stripping regardless ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
pucca_princxss: I think Heeseung's house might b haunted :'0
Chelbear03: HEESEUNGS FUCKING ABS RN- IS HE TRYING TO KILL ME !??!?
yxstar3ject: 👁👄👁
The chat was going crazy at this point, their flood of comments honestly being the last thing on your mind as you sat bottomless in Heeseung's gaming chair, wearing his T-shirt as he searched for another shirt somewhere behind you.
A billion emotions were coursing through your veins, still trying to grasp how you went from sneaking out your bedroom window, stripping in front of an audience, and getting flustered from the mere presence of Heeseung now.
"Alright guys, this was fun but we're gonna call it a night for now," Heeseung said as he came back into frame, not even bothering to sit back down as his right hand found the mouse, moving it towards the end stream button.
"Yeah, I think my streaming career might end here," you added jokingly, making Heeseung chuckle a bit at your words, his bright smile doing nothing but make your stomach flutter all over again.
What was going on with you?
"Who knows? Maybe we can work on starting an OnlyFans together ..."
"Heeseung-"
"I'm kidding," he laughed again, looking at your face from the screen, not even aware of how he bit his lip before speaking, "you look pretty on camera though, for what its worth."
The all-too familiar tune of the livestream ending rang in your ears, the screen displaying stats of the broadcast engagement, which surpassed any and every stream you've ever filmed before.
"Wow," Heeseung marveled, just as he shut his computer off.
"I know," you added, stretching your back while sitting, "we don't even reach stats like that in a week..."
"I wasn't talking about the ratings, ____," he returned, the room seeming much more quiet now that the computer was off, even though it's been this way the whole time.
"Enough about that, though," he started again, taking your hands in his to pull you out of the chair, "I haven't been a very good host to you this evening... making you work first thing before properly treating you... allow me to make up my lacking..."
"I mean... you gave me a nice seat and something to drink... you even lended me one of your shirts after I made a big mess of myself," you replied while giggling, feeling silly as he held both of your hands while speaking formally all of a sudden.
"Yes, yes, but I'm serious," he continued, now guiding you down to the rug lying in the middle of his bedroom floor, "you still like candy, right?"
ALMOST ANOTHER HOUR had passed and it was somewhere around midnight give or take, you and Heeseung hardly feeling tired as you sat on the mat together, alternating between eating orange slices and gummy bears.
You were propped up on your elbows, a glow still present on his face from the laughter you've shared together so far, even though there was something less innocent you wanted to get off your chest.
You were feeling completely reckless already, and you figured it wouldn’t hurt for you to push things a little further.
Besides, it’s not everyday that a girl like you gets an opportunity like this just placed in her lap.
It's just like Heeseung said, you'd be a fool to give up this bond you two share and not explore it further...
Plus, you weren't sure how much longer you could hide behind the good girl act.
Giselle was right: Heeseung had sex written in full length parables all up and down his six-foot-something body, and you'd be lying if you said it didn't turn you on.... if you said it didn't reel you in, like a burning desire to explore what's corrupted.
To be ruined.
"Heeseung," you started, making him look down at you as he sat with his legs crossed, hair messy from the amount of times he ran a hand through it, "can I ask you something?... It's... kinda personal..."
He popped another strawberry flavored gummy bear into his mouth, "As long as it isn't about your period, I should be good to help you then," he chuckled slightly.
"And what makes you think that I need help with something?"
"Hmm… maybe just that way that your nails keep picking with my wrist watch right now," he answered quietly, drawing your attention to your fingers which tend to get busy whenever you were nervous.
"Oh- I... I didn't even realize...," you laughed at yourself, shying your hands away before sitting up and hiding them in your lap.
"Well go on," he urged, looking back at you with warmth in his eyes, taking off his glasses and setting them aside, "What'd you wanna ask me?"
You let out a breath, clenching your thighs a bit as your sight fell between his legs.
Fuck, did he just laugh? God, he definitely noticed your peeking... you fucking perver-
"I don't really know how to word this but..." you chewed on your lip in thought, "Sometimes... when it's just you and me alone like this... even when we're just video chatting... I feel," you looked up at the ceiling as if it'd help you divulge, "I don't really know what to call it."
He blinked at your words, adjusting his sitting position on the ground, "Are there certain things I do or say that make you feel... whatever it is that you can't explain?" He asked, tilting his head at you, just as his hand inched closer to you on the rug, but not quite touching your skin yet.
"Its a few things, actually-"
"Like what?" His hand was now on your thigh, eyes glued on your shaky figure even though you avoided eye contact, lost in the veins that trailed the pretty skin of his arm.
"When you touch me," you whispered so quietly, the only reason he heard you was because he read your lips, thinking in his own mind what it'd be like to taste them, "like that."
"Speak up for me, I can hardly hear you," he urged, almost as if cooing at you.
"I can't," you said shakily, chest expanding slightly with each heavy breath you took in and let out.
Your idea of being bold was starting to backfire... if only you could stop being so awkward about this for one second-
"It's just me, ____," he whispered with a slight chuckle this time, your hands finding the fluffy rug beneath you as your skin still stung from where he'd last touched you, "be as honest with me as you need."
"Maybe it's best we just pretend I never said anything," your voice trailed off, regretting having looked into his dark eyes that stared back at yours because you felt as though your shield had faltered, his energy coaxing your mind to wander.
"Would you mind if I took a guess?," Heeseung offered with an expression you couldn't read, but you nodded anyway, just as his hand traveled further up your thigh, your breath hitching in your chest as you felt his finger tips meet your core.
"You feel something in here, don't you?," he whispered again, "Hurts, doesn't it?"
Like hunger pains, you answered in your head, finding his shoulder as half of you thought to push him away while the other half just needed to touch him.
You nodded shyly in response, thankful that he didn't move any further so you could catch your breath, already too effected by his actions.
"I feel it sometimes, too. The aching... but I'm sure you're old enough to know there's only one way to get rid of it."
You didn't even have to ask to know what he was implying, feeling tempted to give in to whatever this urge was.
He was right though. It did ache, and so badly, your own core tearing up with a need you never intended to entertain.
That's when his touch creeped closer to your core, your thighs closing around his hand as you struggled to think clearly.
You almost couldn't in a state like this.
It baffled you how the energy was starting to change, but it was only a matter of time that you'd be able to sit bottom less in front of Heeseung looking the way he does before something sexual would happen.
"Are you willing to let me help you?" He asked, gripping your flesh between his hands as a shy sound fell from your lips.
You were having second thoughts.
"As much as I'd like to, Hee, it just doesn't seem right anymore..."
Even though this was all your idea to begin with-
"But doesn't it feel right?" he pressed, feeling his hands gently pry your thighs back open, but its not like you were putting up much of a fight either, "Besides, you wouldn't have told me if you didn't want me to do something about it..."
In this moment, you couldn't care less about maintaining that fleeting sense of virtue all the elders in your life harped on growing up.
You were simply young, horny, lovesick, and in need of a release.
Before you knew it, your legs were parted for him, your back against the rug as his head got comfortable at your heat, fingers barely grazing over your now bare cunt before he started leaving plush kisses against your sweet spot.
The ache was definitely still there, but having him this close to you made it feel better.
Almost too good, honestly…
“Heeseung-” you cried out, clamming your thighs around his head as you felt his thick and warm tongue enter you.
Hooking his hands at your knees, it helped to open you back up for him, feeling your stomach tighten as he continued to lick you down.
“I’m still here, baby…” he cooed, looking back up at you, just as your phone started to ding, "relax for me, alright?"
It was a few random messages here and there, you being too pleasure-drunk to give a damn as he continued lapping at your slick, alternating between one and two fingers as he teased your hole, only making you want more.
“Fuck…s- someone’s calling me,” you whined, propping up on your elbows with tired eyes as you reached for your phone, seeing none other than Giselle's contact number as Heeseung left your core, getting on his knees and unbuckling his belt.
"What're you-"
Your words were cut off as he leaned closer into you, his bulge resting in between your folds as he looked into your eyes and said, "Answer it."
He was already rocking against your pussy as you struggled to stay focused, his boxers being covered in your slick just from how wet you'd gotten, even though you nodded no.
“You want me to help you, don’t you?” He continued, completely aware of your stalling and hesitance as the phone continued to ring, your breathing only getting heavier as he kept grinding against you.
You bit your lip, clenching around nothing as his fingers cascaded over your sensitive spot. Heeseung practically drooled at the sight, your tight little cunt all slick and messy for him.
"Hello?" Giselle asked over the phone, "where the hell are you right now?"
Fuck.
You watched nervously as Heeseung pulled his boxers past his hips, his thickness springing up now that it was finally free to breathe.
"What're you talking about, I was just in my room," you lied terribly, watching Heeseung with pleading eyes as he lined himself up with your entrance, bracing a hand on you lower abdomen while glaring back at you, a glint of playfulness in his doe eyes.
Oh, the way you wanted to smack him across his pretty face right now-
"I wasn't born yesterday, ____. I checked your room an hour ago and you're still not here. Tell me where you are," she continued, voice cracking a bit as you winced through a bitten lip, thanks to Heeseung somehow having slid his thickness inside you.
Well, most of the way, at least...
"____?"
"Y-yes, I'm listening, just- don't worry about me, I'll be back in a bit-"
"That still doesn't answer my question, ____..."
Thud.
You accidentally dropped your phone beside your head once Heeseung pushed all the way in now, leaving a few kisses along your neck to help you calm down.
His hips were still, but for some reason, your breathing remained shaky beneath him, your step-sister still awaiting your reply on the other side of the phone.
"Call you later," you said in a squeaky voice, reaching over to hang up the phone as Heeseung started to move again, your legs trembling a bit as the nerves in your mind traveled through your whole body.
"Now that wasn't so hard, was it?" He asked sarcastically, hand following a trail from your waist, over your boob, then to your neck, goosebumps sprouting on your skin as you suddenly felt cold, your body internally shivering.
"Hee," you said with a whimper, feeling his grip loosen around your neck before he started thrusting into your walls, your slick providing just enough lubrication for him to slide in and out easily.
You couldn't even think in your mind at this point, his actions already becoming more than you could handle given how new everything was.
How nice he felt.
"C'mon, don't get quiet on me now, baby, I just started," he teased, slamming his pelvis against yours to hopefully reel a moan out of you, which obviously worked, your hand flying up to grip the fluffy rug over your head as it became harder to hide your sounds.
He hissed at the feeling of you clenching around him, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth as he looked into your eyes.
"So either you like it when I'm rough with you or when I call you baby..." he started in a low voice, "which is it?"
"M-maybe both... now can you stop trying to turn me on with your words for one fucking second?," you asked with labored breaths, feeling your orgasm creep up on you a lot sooner than anticipated.
Sure, this was your first time, but you were glad he didn't treat you like a baby during the whole thing.
There was just something about the way his voice sounded in this moment, the way he was rutting into you like a horny teenager that took you over the edge.
And he was being such a tease, trying to make you talk knowing that your sentences would be broken and whiney thanks to how rough he was going.
He wanted to hear you falling apart underneath him.
He let out the most attractive chuckle you'd ever heard at your words, "But I can tell it's working," he smirked, bracing himself against the floor so you could wrap your legs around him better, "now quit your complaining and keep taking me like a good girl, alright?"
You're sure your clit started doing backflips at the pet-name, coupled with the pretty sounds he was very intentionally humming beneath your ear.
He found your wrists on the rug, sliding up to your hands and interlacing his fingers with yours,
“Stop trying to act tough, I can tell this is all new to you…. don’t even know what to do with your hands, huh?” his said, watching as your eyes get lost in the view of his shaggy hair.
He snickered, “you can touch it if you want…”
Fuck, you thought to yourself. You don’t know why you felt the need to put on some act for him… maybe it was because you assumed a competition between yourself and other girls he’s been with, even though in reality, you’d been the only girl on his mind for a while now.
“I…,” you started with a stutter, “I can’t.”
Your fingers were still interlaced with his, but your inability to touch him had less to do with the fact that he had you pinned down, and more so to do with your nerves.
As badly as he wanted to keep toying with your head in this moment, he could you were getting closer from how your breath kept hitching, so he didn’t have much time to play.
Releasing his grip from your hands, he brought a thumb to your chin, tapping at it for you to open your mouth, “I’m gonna speed up now then, okay?”
He choked out, his own head becoming a little fuzzy as you parted your lips obediently for him, the sight of your tongue laving at his fingers being enough to make him feel like cumming.
He knew you had to get home quick now, but he still wanted to give you the best orgasm of your life.
Once he collected enough of your spit on his fingers, he slid his hand down, circling your swollen bud while looking into your eyes, your hands automatically flying to his shoulders to brace yourself.
“Fuck, Heeseung~,” you cursed with furrowed brows, whimpers that almost sounded like high pitched hiccups falling from your lips as you felt your hips chase his.
There was so much energy coursing through both of your bodies that it could charge your dying phone on the floor right now.
“It’s okay baby, you’re almost- shit, you’re almost there,” he grunted weakly as he continued fucking into your walls with his fingers at your clit, his own eyes closing at how good your tightness felt around him.
You never heard yourself sound like this before, getting all whiny just as he whispered the words “Come for me” against your neck, sealing the space with a kiss and retreating his hand from your core, holding you in place as your orgasm hit like a flood.
You were squirming so much, walls pulsating like a drum as he kissed you down, your hands finally being brave enough to grip at his hair while he rode out your high.
You could tell that he didn’t finish inside you, but he was nice enough to slow down and not fuck you completely stupid.
“I can’t even believe we just did that,” you mumbled mindlessly, eyes staring back at him as he started to gently caressed your cheek.
“Wasn’t too bad for a quickie though, right?,” he asked jokingly while still inside you, not quite yet ready to pull out of your comforting warmth.
To say goodbye to the you he brought out in this sex-filled space.
“No… it wasn’t bad at all,” you smiled back, words sounding somewhere in between a shocking realization and sincere compliment.
“Then I guess that means we can look forward to doing this more often-”
“Heeseung-”
“Kidding,” he whispered softly, meeting your lips in one last kiss before leaning back up to adjust his pants, “now let’s get you cleaned up and ready for home before your mom has me crucified.”
“Okay,” you said while laughing slightly until he pulled out of you, your legs trembling a bit from the missing fullness.
From the feeling in his chest, Heeseung came to fully accept that he was 110% in love with you, not giving a flying fuck about the naysayers who’d disapprove of your now-even-more-complicated friendship.
You on the other hand, came to realize that Heeseung was worth much more than being judged by a bunch of hypocrites, and that you now had the courage to make a lot of your own decisions now, even if they’re solely for the sake of pleasure.
”Still,” you continued, watching as he stood up from the ground to grab a pack of wipes from his desk, “I just remembered that I locked my bedroom window when I left.”
“That’s a good thing, right?” He asked while parting your legs, wiping your sweaty thighs down with your panties hunched up in his other hand.
You admired the view of him cleaning you up with adoration flooding your heart, your limbs letting themselves relax as feathery words fell from your lips, “It means I might have to spend the night at your place for a little longer…”
Fin…
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♱ Thank you beyond words to everyone reading this right now! I teased the release of this fic a while ago but ended up changing almost everything that I’d originally written because it was kinda shitty 🥴 but hopefully you all enjoyed this fic anyway! Also, masterlist is here !!
♱ tag list: @fakeuwus @adeoluhh @zerasari @anonant @yaatrickyaaa @depressedandobsessed666 @woninluv @moonshoon @imjakes-wifeofc1 @heesbee @kaykay11sworld @wannieepisod @ilikekpop-c @heesoo11 @idkdykilr @seungjiseyo @nctislifue @ro-diaries @heesushiii @jakehooni @babygirlmarshmellow @jaysdze @princeseung @flowerbe0m @skzenhalove @rayofsunshineeee @wonsbaer @namdeyuoi @tasnim10 @cheruluv @squoxle @nikisvanillaccola @wonbinisbabygurl @addictedtohobi @yourmomscuntis2tighy @ashgonedash
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rklve · 9 months
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RAINY DAYS | JEON JUNGKOOK - PART ONE
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summary: your life choices left not only yours, but jungkook's heart broken in peaces. now you're back in town, and just like pluto, even if it's cold and dark, he tends to orbit around his sun forever.
➣ pairing: jk x f!reader
➣ genre/au: exes to lovers; angst; slow burn; fluff; smut (eventually).
➣ 3.4k words
warnings: e2l. oc broke koo's heart :( but she did not mean it. they both overthink too much. jk is such a pet dad (BAM IS HERE YAY). oc is a confused mess. mutual pining. cursing. a lot of angst (sorry!). jungkook is a simp, head over hells crazy about oc. fluff bc why not. tae is bitter asf but he's right on this one. jk is the best boy I WANT HIM!!!!!!!!!!
song inspo: rainy days — V
wish I knew how to find the way right back to you, on rainy days like
part one | part two | drabble one
“I can't take it anymore,” Jungkook says as he stumbles for the seventh time on his feet walking around the living room “I’m losing my mind, Bamie.”
The dog looks at his owner with his head pointed sideways as if he understands what he’s been sorrowing about for the past 10 minutes. The rain pours angrily outside the apartment, Jungkook sighs as he realizes talking to his big ass puppy won’t solve any of his problems.
“She’s like, 5 min away from us, Bam! I should text her, right?”
He looks over his phone again, your instagram story is open and a picture of a window full of raindrops is seen — he knows where you’re at, you’ve both been to that coffee shop over a hundred times for the past years now. Can’t remember the last time he’s been to that place ‘cause he couldn’t stand the thought of being there without you. Now he’s wondering, wondering, wondering. Wonders if you’re back for real this time. If you are alone. If you are thinking about him too. Wonders what would happen if he just replied your story right now.
@jeonjk97: heard it’s the best caramel macchiato in town 👍
No— that’s too lame. Quickly erases the message.
@jeonjk97: want a ride home? it’s pretty bad outside. 
Throws his phone on the sofa as he realizes he doesn’t know if you would accept his offer, doesn’t know if you’re sharing an apartment with Lola again either. Realizes he doesn’t know anything that’s been going on with you for a while now. More than what you let your 897 followers on Insta know too, at least. Blames himself for it, but knows it was for the best. Misses you like a fucker anyway.
“I should just call her.”
He picks up his phone, then also realizes he deleted your number months ago so he wouldn’t call you whenever his drunk ass thought it was the right thing to do. 
“For fucks sake, grow some balls, Jungkook” he whines angrily at the air purifier as if it is the source of his problems. “Okay, Taehyung will know what do.”
He calls his best friend quickly, and prays Taehyung picks up before he grabs his car keys and drives himself to the colorful little cafe at the end of the street. Remembers how much you loved that place and the cookies they served. One caramel macchiato with extra topping and two medium chocolate cookies. You always ordered the same thing. Every damn time. Said it was in you, to never let go of the things you loved. You let go of him anyway.
“Jungkook-ah! Why are you calling? I told you I can't go out—“ 
“She’s back in town.” He cuts Taehyung abruptly and suddenly the other line is mute as well. Probably doesn’t believe it’s happening just as Jungkook didn’t believe himself minutes ago. 
“Man, are you sure? Like, back for real?” he says, and Jungkook swears he can hear the disbelief in his tone from the other side. Yeah, he knows Taehyung is full of his late night calls to talk about you. Knows he is the one that’s been listening to it for months now —besides from his dobermann, of course— he’s the one who gets it, ‘cause he’s the only one who feels bitterly betrayed too. You were one of his best friends and yet, he didn’t knew your plans to move out from Busan as well. 
“Aish, I’m not sure hyung. But she posted a picture a little while ago at the cafe down the street.” he blurted out, “Can’t even think straight now, man. You think she’s back for the holidays?” 
Taehyung wondered for a little while. It was still August, Chuseok was weeks later. He didn’t say it out loud, but it wasn’t like you to drop work for so long, even if it was to visit your hometown. Nevertheless, he didn’t want Jungkook to get his hopes up. He knows how he is. Doesn’t want to see his friend’s heart breaking all over again.
“Mmm. Maybe, don’t know.” he sighed out loud “I thought we agreed to unfollow her after the second month.”
He hears Jungkook’s sad chuckle on the other side of the line, “Yeah, we did.” 
Taehyung knows Jungkook wouldn’t bring himself to do it tho, and now he just confirms it. Being a little bit more resentful than Jungkook gave him the motivation to do so, but it doesn’t mean he hasn’t been missin’ your ugly face. 
“Ok, so I need you to refresh my mind now. Tell me something so I won’t step outside that door right this second and make a fool of myself.” Jungkook continues to talk as if he’s been charged on 220W. And maybe he was. His heart has never beaten so fast for the past twelve months. His hair is all over the place from the countless times he grabbed it since he saw your photo. The tip of his fingers are tingling. Yeah, maybe he’s been electrocuted or something.
“Go.”
“What?” Jungkook says in disbelief. Doesn’t think he hears straight, ‘cause Taehyung would be the last one to say such a thing. 
“I said go, Jungkook.” he sighs for what it seems to be the tenth time on the phone call. “I know you need this. You haven’t been yourself for so long now. You two have to talk properly at some point.”
“Ay, how frustratin really—” he tsks.
“For real, man. Go. Now.” he firmly says “What’s the worst she can do, leave?” Jungkook senses the bitter words coming from Taehyung’s mouth. He knows he’s not mad at you, just hurt. Knows Taehyung would forgive you in a heartbeat if you said how sorry you were for everything that went thru. Wonders if he would forgive you that easily too. But he knows his friend is right. He needs closure. Needs this.
“Yeah. Right.” he bites his lips and looks around. Sees Bam looking at him, as if he’s expecting an action from him too. “I’ll talk to you later, bro. Thanks.”
He turns off the phone and grabs his car keys tightly. Yeah, he’s doing it. Won’t think too much, it’s better this way. He will get in the car, drive for 5 minutes. Enter the coffee shop. Order. Pretend he doesn’t know you’re there. Eventually look over the spot he knows you’re at, the same table over the corner where you two always used to sit together, by the large window. Grab the coffee and go over casually, ask how you’ve been. Offer you a ride home —to your parents, probably, since you moved out from your apartment on the neighborhood for a while now. Say it’s because of the rain, he knows you hate to ask for Ubers on the rain. Didn’t trust just anyone driving on bad weather. Such a smart girl. He misses the shit out of you. 
“Damn, ok. Pack it up, man.” 
He calls Bam to his house and watches as the dog quickly follow his lead, as if he knows Jungkook is too anxious to play around right now. “Dad will be back soon, okay? Behave.”
And so he checks out his hair one last time on the mirror at his bathroom and goes before he changes his mind.
The drive is pretty quick. It’s actually a route he does walking, but it’s still pouring rain so he’s carrying on. On a rainy day. To a coffee shop. To get a coffee he could have made at the comfort of his home with his own little coffee machine. But it’s okay, he will just play pretend for this time.
He stops the car and just realizes he forgot his umbrella. “Are you fucking serious, Jungkook?” 
Great. Brilliant. He feels so fucking dumb right now. 
Thankfully, due to the cold season he was wearing his black sweatshirt and sweatpants so the rain wouldn’t do so much damage. He quickly got off the car and ran inside the cafe. 
Surprisingly, it was full for a rainy night. Perhaps everyone had the usual thought; too lazy to make their own foods, they step out to grab something warm on the best coffee in the neighborhood. 
Jungkook plays the script on his head over and over again as he whipes his hair side to side like a fluffy dog to get rid of the water that soaked it a little bit. 
He looks ahead to the counter and his mind goes blank as he sees you over there now. At the little chair on the middle of the cafe. You seem lonely, messing with your hair a little bit, making a braid with a single tiny lock. It’s an old habit to make time pass, and Jungkook hates he remembers every little detail about you. His heart now has stopped, dropped to his knees. He really misses you. 
“Bee!” the waiter calls, and Jungkook recognizes the nickname. Knows it’s you, ‘cause he’s the one that gave it to you years ago. Used to call you bee just to make fun of you, ‘cause you’re such a sweet tooth. Never met someone that loves sugar more than you do, so he started to call you that since you two became friends.
He watches at the end of the waiting line as you get up, straight your hand and pick up two cookies in a little pink plate. Chocolate chips cookies. Your favorite. His favorite as well.
You start to eat slowly so he averts his eyes. Doesn’t want to be catch staring and look like a fucking weirdo. It’s not like he drove here to see you. Talk to you. Not at all, the coffee here is great. 
Finally the line walks and it’s his turn. “One black coffee, please. No sugar.” He says softly and suddenly feels his neck start to tingle. Knows you just realized he’s here, and you’re staring at him. Pretends he doesn’t tho, so continues to talk to the waitress as she asks who she would call when it’s ready “JK.” he says, then turns around to look for somewhere to sit and wait for the order. Looks over the table that you originally were, the one you posted a photo of. Then realizes now there’s a couple there, laughing together and taking pics of each other. He knows you. Knows you most likely offered the clingy couple the table, cause the house is full, and you wouldn’t take the table just for yourself. Even if it meant you would end up eating by the counter on the little puffed chair, you loved to drool over the pastries anyways.
He slowly looks the other way. Knows you’re on this direction so he has to be careful. You’re looking down. Seem sad all of the sudden and he just wants to hug you. For fucks sake. This is harder than he thought. 
He sighs again as he realizes the only spots available are the 2 chairs on your right. He chooses the one that’s a little bit far just to be safe.
As he walks down, his chest tightens a little bit more. Now he doesn’t know what he’s doing here. It was a bad idea. Doesn’t even remember what the plan was at the first place. 
He can smell your perfume as he walks past you and it’s like someone punches his stomach. Your sweet smell fills his nostrils and he just wants to be closer. Shove his nose on your hair like he used to. Then go down your neck and feel your skin respond with little goosebumps as he moves along it softly. Damn it. Jungkook wants to curse the life out of you but he can’t even bring himself to be mad right now. Only knows he misses you. Your touch. Your kiss. You.
Finally he sits and pretends as if he didn’t notice you there, continually looking over his phone as if it’s the most interesting thing in the world trying to figure out what to do next.
“JK!” The waitress calls him and he’s put out of his own world, looking up right away. You seem to be startled too as you look directly at him. You two look at each other for what seems to be minutes in a trance. You give him a tiny smile. He gives one back.
“JK!” he hears the call again and pulls himself out of the trance, going to grab the coffee from the waitress who’s on your left side. He pays for it and looks at you again. You’re still looking at him. Kinda unsure on how to act, he figures. It’s okay, cause he doesn’t know how to either. 
As he sits, now on the chair closer to your right, he looks straight ahead and takes a gulp of the coffee. “Fuck!” he curses and pulls the coffee cup away as he burns his tongue with the damn thing.
You laugh thru your nose and his ears rapidly catch the sweet sound he used to hear all the time. Looks sideways to you, “Funny, huh?” he feels the air a little bit less heavy now, and he’s relieved.
“You just never change, Koo.” you say, still with that damn smile on your face he adores so much. He can’t take his eyes off of you. Realizes he never got over you, not even for a second. Probably never will.
“Don’t call me that.” those damned butterflies on his guts as he digests what you’ve said. You know it’s his favorite nickname. Knows only you call him by it. Knows he melts alway with this shit everytime.
You’re staring at him like that. So pretty. Soft brown sparkly eyes he missed so much. Now they seem to start hardening. “I’m sorry.” You say with a broken voice, and he feels the air shift all over again in a matter of seconds. Doesn’t know if you’re apologizing for the sweet nickname. For leaving him. For not calling. For not coming back. For everything. 
“How’s everything?” He tries to ease the air back again. “It’s been a minute.”
He sees the corner of your lips tremble a little bit and you gulp. His chest pangs. Wonders if he did the right thing by pretending you never existed for the past months now. Just wants to make up for all the time both of you lost.
“Yup, it has.” You reply after a while. “I’m doing okay. What about you?” 
You look up at him like everything is okay. If he didn’t know you, he would believe you were. But he knows better. You can’t hide anything from him, really. At least that’s what he thought. Knows he could be wrong, just like he was a year ago too.
“Cool. I’m cool.” he licks his dry lips and starts to think about his next move. Mind starts to blow up, a trillion thoughts at the same time and he’s back at it again. Can’t put his neurons to work properly. You’re actually right here in front of him, how is he supposed to?
Seems like you’re struggling yourself too. He doesn’t know if you’re trying to come up with an excuse to leave right now, or trying to find a subject in common as well.
 You stare at your now half eaten cookie like it’s the most valuable thing in the world. The other one is already on the bag to go. You probably were planning on taking home to eat when the late night sweet crave hits you, like he remembers. Will put it on the microwave so it gets warm again and take a cup of milk with you, like you used to. Turn on netflix and watch one of those lame cooking programs, ‘cause you loved to waste your time watching people losing their heads to make giant chocolate sculptures. He secretly loved watching it with you. It’s the reason he watched every episode back and forth while you were away too.  
“Is Bamie okay?” you murmur, now staring at your coffee cup with a little smile, thinking about the little puppy. Remembers how energetic and loving he was. Just like Jungkook. “You haven’t posted him in a while now.”
His tongue feels bittersweet again. He’s somehow happy knowing that you’ve been catching up with his life throught social media, even tho he disappears once in a while. At the same time, he’s sad. You could have been there for Bam. Should have, since you are the one who came up with the idea in the first place. Said he needed a little friend to match up with his chaotic energy. He ended up convinced and adopted the little guy. You always tended to get the best of him. Promised you’d help him to take good care of the baby, but only spent three months with Bam. Still, it’s like the puppy knows something is missing. Every night he looks over the door at any noise, like he’s expecting you to come throught it. Just like Jungkook used to do for the first months back then. 
“He’s great, actually. Bigger than I expected him to be. Eats like a fucking bear.” he giggles a little remembering his big boy. “He’s loud too. Don’t know how the neighbors still haven’t ganged up against me to kick us out of the apartment.”
You giggle alongside him imagining the chaos those two must have been doing together. “I figured. You always have spoiled him too much. Told ya he would get bad habits.”
“Hey! You spoiled him too!” he throws it right back. Remembers how you used to let Bam sleep with the two of you on bed. It took him months to break that habit from the puppy’s routine.
You look up at him and smiles. Bright now. You know he’s right. You’ve treated that puppy like it was your own son. Kinda misses the three of you together like a big happy family.
Suddenly a loud thunder is heard and both of you look out the foggy window at the same time. The sky is even darker now, angrily pouring rain like it’s the end of the earth. The coffee shop is emptier. Everyone outside your bubble must’ve realized that it was no longer safe to be out in the streets. But here you two are. Letting time pass by, enjoying each others presence even if it’s kinda weird. Kinda sad after all these months apart.
Jungkook knows it’s time to act. Step up and do what he was planning since he left home. Can’t bring himself to. Is too scared you will say no. Too scared you will let him down again. 
“I think I should get going.” you say softly wrapping up what is left of the cookie and putting it on your bag over the counter. “The weather is getting worst.”
“Want a ride home?” Jungkook quickly says before he looses the sudden courage. Sees you're taken aback so he continues, “I know you won’t be able to catch an uber or taxi right now.”
You still wonder a little bit. Jungkook’s anxiety is bubbling up again as he waits your answer. Why can’t you accept a simple offer? You can’t stand the thought of being around him? Do you hate him? Perhaps you don’t want him in your life ever again. You want to stay like this. Just be somebody that he used to know.
And that’s what scares him the most.
“I brought an umbrella” you finally say. Jungkook frowns. Knows you have no umbrella with you, he would’ve seen it by now.
He puffs. Knows it’s bullshit, but won’t call it. “Right. Suit yourself.” Then he gets up, forgets his full coffee by the counter, now cold. He feels fucking cold too. Already regrets coming to this stupid cafe, in this stupid weather, for no stupid reason. He takes his sweatshirt off and puts it over his head so the rain won’t get to him this time. Opens the door.
“Jungkook! Wait!” you suddenly say. “I actually didn’t.” you say pouty, coming up to him.
He doesn’t say anything. Just takes his sweatshirt, puts it over your head instead. He was wearing his taegeuk warriors jersey underneath it, will definitely get soacked but can’t bring himself to care at all. Just cares about you. Holds the glass door for you just like old times. You look up at him with your big doll eyes and he can’t do anything but look back. It’s like you want to talk through them. He wonders what’s going through your pretty little head right now. Probably overthinking too much, just like he does. 
“C’mon," he softly says "Let’s get you home.”
yayyy there it goes! my first ff ever i'm so happy <3 this was supposed to be an oneshot but i got carried away and wrote more than i expected so i had to cut it off hehe
also, please be aware that english is not my native language so i’m sorry if there’s any typos 🥹
i'll upload part 2 soon! if you want to be tagged pls comment under the post :) thanks for reading xx
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strniohoeee · 7 months
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Ache
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Pairing: Chris Sturniolo X Female Reader ⚠️SMUT⚠️
Synopsis: Chris is struggling with some issues,Y/N is there for him to help him with whatever he wants😌This for that anonymous request I got! Smoochie this for you🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽 message me if you liked it😗
Warnings⚠️: THIS IS SMUT so please back off if you’re a child. There’s hair pulling, spit, roughness, manhandling kind of, use of “good boy”, and tbh I think that’s all🤭🤭
Song of the imagine: Flatline- Justin Bieber
This is a 18+ imagine, so minors please do not interact AT ALL
Chris POV
I had my hand tightly wrapped around my dick stroking going in between firm and light tugs. I was letting the hot water hit my back as I tried to get myself off. It has been a month since I last came, and everytime I try now I simply can not cum. So everyday I'm miserable walking around with blue balls, and there was nothing I could do about it.
I had finally given up when I couldn’t clear my mind to cum, immediately getting frustrated. I just decided to finish my shower, and hope that I could actually cum after my relaxing shower.
I hadn’t been able to cum since coming back from tour. I couldn’t touch myself for a month and a half since I was either on the tour bus, or sharing a room with Nick and Matt. I’m finally back from tour, ready to explode, and here I am struggling to blow my load. Embarrassing….
I finished showering, and decided to lay in bed trying to ignore my painful bulge, but I simply couldn’t. So I decided to try one more time. I removed the covers off myself and decided to pull my pajama bottoms down slightly allowing my hard cock to spring forward. Once again I allowed myself to have no thoughts and began to stroke my dick, but to no surprise my arm was starting to cramp, and I couldn’t cum no matter how hard I was trying.
“What the fuck is wrong with me” I groaned in frustration as I rubbed my eyes
I decided to pull my pants back up, and text Y/N asking if I could go over. She was my best friend and we were so comfortable with each other that I could tell her anything with no judgment.
-Hey. I’m sorry to bother you so late, but can I come over??
-Hiii Chris! Yes ofc I’m actually really bored :(
-cool I’ll be over in 15. I really need to chat with you
-ohhh okay you’re scaring me lol
-oh no sorry it’s personal issues
-gotcha! Okay drive safe see you soon<3
I hearted the message and put my hoodie on, and grabbed my keys. I hopped into the car, and drove over to Y/N’s. No music playing either because I couldn’t hear anything other than my throbbing cock
I parked in a spot, and walked to her apartment building, heading up to her floor. I knocked on the door, and within 30 seconds the door flys open
“Chrissssss I missed you” Y/N said pulling me inside and giving me a big hug
“I missed you too” I said hugging her tighter
“Come sit down” she said letting go and plopping down onto her couch
“How was tour?” She asked as she looked down at her phone
“Uhh it was good. It was very fun meeting everyone” I told her looking at her every move
“I’m glad you had fun, but I’m so glad you’re back home” she said smiling at me
“I’m so glad to be back too” I said staring at her lips
“Chris, you seem off, what's wrong?” She asked examining my face. She hadn’t noticed my bulge as I had a pillow on my lap in a nonchalant manner
“I’m not sure what’s wrong with me, but something’s not right” I told her
“What do you mean?” She asked getting concerned
“This is so embarrassing” I said rubbing my face
“Chris, come on. We’re best friends and we tell each other everything. You can be as TMI as you want I don’t care” she said giggling
“Yeah, but this….its a little weird” I said
“Chris, just tell me please” she said, losing patience.
“Okay. I haven’t been able to cum since we got back from tour, and on tour I couldn’t masturbate because we were on a tour bus, or sharing a room, and now that I’m back I can’t fucking cum, and I need to so so bad” I said kinda whining the last part
“I’m sorry Chris, but I’m not sure what to do” she said looking at me concerned
“Could you maybe help me?” I asked her avoiding eye contact
“Chris…. I don’t know this seems like territory I shouldn’t get myself into” She said looking away
“I know, but can you at least talk to me while I masturbate, and if I can’t cum then I’ll leave, and this never happened” I told her
“Chris” she started, but I cut her off
“Please Y/N. PLEASE I’ll get down on my knees and beg” I told her looking at her
“Okay fine” she said
“Thank you so fucking much” i told her
“How do you want me to do this?” she asked me kinda laughing
“Uhhh can you take off your top I wanna look at your tits” I told her licking my lips
“Okay but take your shirt off too” she said getting down on the floor, and removing her shirt and bra
I removed my hoodie and slid my pajama pants down a little bit. Allowing my cock to spring up
“Fuck you look so hot like that” I told her watched her with half lidded eyes
“Chris you can’t say stuff like that to me” she said looking away blushing slightly
“Sorry you just look so fucking hot” I told her stroking my cock
“Do you want me to talk to you?” She asked, and I nodded my head yes
“Chris I don’t know what to say, this is awkward” she said laughing
“Say whatever you want, but before you do come spit on my cock” I told her, and she gasped, but complied. She crawled over and spat all over my cock
“Fuck” I said as I rolled my head back
“You like that?” She asked in a seductive way
My head snaps towards her and my eyes are wide with surprise, and for some reason that made my cock even harder
“You’re such a dirty boy” she said batting her lashes at me
“Oh fuck, please keep talking like that” I said as my hips thrusted upwards
“So pathetic, can’t cum on your own. You have to use me” she said as she rubbed her tits
I just moaned and allowed my jaw to fall slack
“You like being treated like a dirty fucking slut don’t you” she asked me touching my thighs
I fucking shuddered, and allowed my hips to thrust upwards
“Answer me now. You like to be degraded like a dirty boy” she said inching her hands closer to my dick
“Ohhh fuck I do! I DO! I love being treated like a slut” I said looking at her through my lashes
“Are you going to cum” she asked, spitting on the head of my cock as my hand went down. I let out a loud whine and vigorously nodded my head up and down
“Awww look at you. Cumming so fast you can’t even last a long time. How pathetic” she said laughing, and this made me lose it. I fucking came all over my lower stomach with a loud groan and my eyes shut.
She got up quickly and got a paper towel to allow me to clean myself up. I cleaned myself up, but my cock was painfully hard still
“I need more” I told her breathing heavily
“Chris that’s not what you said” she said still shirtless looking back at me
“Fuck I know, but I’m so fucking hard right now I need more” I told her looking at her tits
“Well touch yourself again” she said
“No I need to fuck you” I told her biting my lip
“I don’t know that seems…”
“Please let me fuck you please” I said still looking into her eyes
“That’s not something I could help you with” she said
“Please I’ll be your good boy. I’ll be your best boy you can use me for your own pleasure too” I told her
“Fuck Chris that was so hot” she said biting her lip
“Please Y/N” I said giving her a sad look
“Fuck it. You’re so hot right now I can’t deny that I’m so turned on” she said starting to remove her bottoms
I stood up and grabbed her by the neck and pulled her mouth into mine. I started to kiss her in a sloppy way. Moving from her lips to her neck and down to her boobs taking one into my mouth as I moaned. She shuttered when i did this
“Fuck Chris I need you now” she said tugging my hair at the roots
I grabbed her again and walked her towards her patio windows. Slamming her against it as I kissed her harshly again
“You’re so hot right now I want to fucking cum just by looking at you” I told her. I spit on my fingers and brought them down to her pussy, immediately mixing with her own arousal I started to rub her clit
“Oh my god” she said looking into my eyes with her mouth wide open. I slipped two fingers in as we made out. I fingered her for about 5 minutes before I pulled away
“I need to fuck you now” I told her, but before she could answer I roughly turned her around and pushed her against the glass
“Chris someone might see” she said as her breast and side of her face was up against the window
“Good, they can see you getting fucked” I said as I smacked her ass
I grabbed my dick allowing it to meet her entrance and slowly started to insert myself into her
“Oh fuck fuck fuck” we both said as I slowly pushed into her. She had her right leg propped up on the nightstand she had with a lamp on it.
I grabbed her right arm holding it back, as my other hand grabbed her hair. I started to relentlessly pound into her
All that could be heard was our skin slapping, and our loud pants
“Fuck you take me so well” I moaned into her ear
“Chris you feel so fucking good” she said allowing her head to roll back in ecstasy
I kept pounding into her at a ferocious speed. I was starting to sweat
“Fuck you look so hot all red and sweaty” she said looking at me as her head was turned
“Yeah and you look fucked out” I said kissing her harshly. I was pounding into her as we were sloppily making out
“Wanna ride me baby” I asked breaking away from the kiss
“Fuck yeah” she said. I pulled out of her so I could sit back on her couch. I positioned her over my cock and slowly helped her sink down onto me
“Jesus” she said as she threw her head back.
She started to bounce on my cock as I massaged her tits
“Fuck keep going I’m going to cum so hard” I told her biting my lip and moaning
She went from bouncing to grinding on my cock and clenching down on me
“Chris I’m gonna cum” she said still grinding down on me
When she rolled back I leaned my head down and spit in the space where her clit met my Pelvic bone. This allowed her clit to glide against my pelvic bone with ease
“Shit that was so fucking not Chris I’m going to cum” she said grinding harshly against me
“Keep going baby I wanna see you cum on my cock” I said running a hand through my hair
She kept grinding and soon I felt her twitch, and loudly moaned as her body shook and she fell into me riding her high out.
“Fuck Chris” she said still slowly grinding on me, and kissing on my neck
“I’m gonna cum, can I paint your tits?” I asked her, and she nodded her head yes. I pulled her off of me, and she got down to her knees in front of me. I spit down on my cock and held eye contact with her as I pumped my cock up and down
“Fuck” was all I said as my jaw fell slack, and I came all over her bare chest. Moaning loudly and breathing heavily
Soon I came down from my high
“Fuck that was amazing” I said as I helped her up
“Chris that was the best sex I’ve ever had” she said biting her lip
“Don’t move,” I told her. I grabbed my phone, and snapped a photo of her bare tits covered in my cum
“You look so hot. I will be cumming to this photo for the rest of my life” I told her as I went in for another kiss
“I’m gonna be cumming to the thought of this night every time now” She said back to me
“Just call me up, and I’ll fuck you again and again” I told her
“Mmm i like that” she said getting up. “Come take shower with me” she said sticking her hand out
“Round 2 in the shower?” I asked her half joking
“Mmm that sounds amazing” she said
We both ran to the shower and def had another round in the shower. ;)
The End
Whoever requested this I LOVE YOU, and I hope I didn’t disappoint lmk if you liked 🫶🏽, and if you have any requests don’t be afraid to comments them down below, or ask anonymously, or in my messages🤭
-J💅🏽
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byechristopher · 5 months
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I hate you, too [pt.2].
– CHRIS STURNIOLO SMUT & ANGST.
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PART ONE.
Author's note: HI, I finally wrote it. I originally made a poll but, the answer was pretty clear so, here it is. It was requested, by the way! I'll reply to the message because I forgot to put it here, thanks for the request, dear. Side note, I was listening to Never Lose Me – Flo Mili (during the smut part, obvi). Do not copy/steal my work. :)
Warnings: filthy smut, super super long, didn't proofread, rough smut, car sex, angst. That's pretty much it. Minors dni. Thank you.
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It's been a week since the party I attended, the one where I encountered him.
My mind has been consumed by reflections on that night, so much that I haven't been able to do anything else other than that, except for work. While I assume he might not have dwelled on it, I can't help but wonder if he thinks about me – about the way we touched, the way I looked at him when he prepared to leave. When I didn't want him to leave.
I shake my head, realizing I can't continue this self-inflicted struggle. Accepting the ongoing intimacy with my ex was challenging enough, let alone having feelings that linger inside me, still to this day. I almost gave in that day, when I saw something in his eyes, something that said he still cared about me – mending my dress, that sweet kiss, his declaration of hatred, a reminder of our past. That we once hated each other and that's why we weren't together anymore. Or so we thought.
Deciding that just sitting here, mopping around and feeling sorry for myself isn't going to help at all, I get up determined to go outside and have some fun. No house parties, no hosts, no Chris, no nothing.
My friends are already up for it (and I love them for it), because it only takes ten minutes for them to come over so we can get all dolled up together. It's a few minutes past midnight and we're finally ready (okay, we did have a few pre-drinks then and there), so we immediately call a cab. We reach our destination just a few minutes later and after greeting the girl that was at the entrance of the club, she lets us in and we get lost in the crowd.
You know how it goes; flashing lights everywhere, people kissing and drinking, almost pitch black all around. Looks like clubs aren't that different from house parties after all. A group of friends offers to buy us drinks, and who are we to say no (there's no way we're dancing with any of them, but it's fine) – we're already having the time of our lives, we're drinking, we look amazing, everything seems possible.
Except for the impossible.
Because there's no fucking way Chris happens to be in this same club; I completely lose the ground beneath my feet. I want to turn my back to him, I really do. But at the same time I want him to see me again. I want to see him again.
My friends notice where I'm looking and they know better than to say anything – so they just leave me be. Chris notices me as well and everything stops. Not again. I hope he doesn't come here but deep down I'm praying he does.
"Never had a bitch like me in your life.."
What is it with me, Chris and songs that we both used to like (and have sex while listening to them)? He's looking at me, and I can feel his intense gaze once again. As he drinks something, for a moment, I wish I could see this sight up close, look how his tongue touches the glass. Fucking hell.
Me and my girlfriends sway to the music, letting every beat ignite a playful dance between us. As we keep each other close, the music wraps around us, and for a moment I forget about him. Lost in the rhythm, we surrender to the dance, singing along.
He's here. Well fuck.
He grabs me by the waist and pulls me closer to him – I can't help but roll my eyes, turning around to look into his blue ones, holding my own drink close to me.
"How dare you interrupt my dance?" I yell in his ear so he can hear and he smiles.
"I stayed to watch you for a bit before I approached and interrupted your dance. You were just too irresistible, damn." as usual, he has a big smirk on his face and I just want to slap it off his face.
His arm stays on my waist and I can't find the strength to push it away – his hand roams around my naked back thanks to my dress, not that I'm complaining. He leans in to wrap his lips around my straw, tasting my drink while looking at me.
"Tastes much better with that lipstick you're wearing.." he teases and licks his lips, "..bet you love it even more when it's around my dick." his gaze darkens and my legs shake a little.
"What a shame you'll never see it on you ever again." I give him a sarcastic smile and push him gently with one hand.
"You sure about that?" his lips are touching my ear and again, I hate myself for letting him have such an effect on me.
"Yes. I don't like sharing my lipsticks." I raise a challenging eyebrow, indirectly asking him if he's been fucking anyone else besides me – because if that's the case, I feel like I will completely lose myself.
"Mhmm.. you're already thinking about other girls sucking my dick?" he tilts his head with an innocent-like look on his face, "..jealous about it?" his thumb rubs my bottom lip and his smile returns.
My blood is boiling to say the least, but I know him way better than to show that. So instead, I smile, "I don't have time to think about your dick, baby. Someone else makes sure I don't." take that.
No one. Absolutely no one can make me stop thinking about him in general but I had to say something. Otherwise I might just start crying.
Something shifts in his eyes and I internally high-five myself for achieving to make him jealous once again. He leaves. What? He literally just lets me go and goes back to where his friend group is, turns his back on me and everything. Well, shit.
I'm more than jealous but I want him way more than our egoistic bullshit; I'm shameless, I want him.
I move swiftly through the crowd, desperately trying to find him before i change my mind – and I do find him. He doesn't really expect to see me there but he does and he smiles. I quickly wrap my fingers around his wrist this time, dragging him with me like he did in that house party the previous week. Safely, I lead us out of the club, making sure to not answer any of his questions.
Once he realises that I'm not speaking to him until we reach the car, he stops talking and simply follows me. We finally get into the car and I start the engine.
"Do you realise how crazy that was?" he finally says, he really didn't expect me to just do that.
"I thought you liked crazy." I smirk this time and he huffs, licking his lips and leaning back against the passenger seat, making himself comfortable.
Once I make sure we're somewhere where no one will be able to see us, I immediately stop the car, lock it and I practically jump on him, straddling his thighs. His hands immediately grab my hips, his mouth hungry, searching for my lips and his eyes even hungrier.
"You drive me fucking crazy." he almost growls as he quickly rides up my dress, exposing the rest of my thighs and panties.
I undo his shirt with shaky fingers, leaving it on but making sure I have access to his naked body. I almost attack his skin with hungry kisses and love bites as he keeps himself occupied with my butt, kneading and smacking the skin every now and then.
I wrap my lips around his nipple and now my lipstick is long gone – his moans fill the car, fogging up the windows as I continue sucking on his sensitive nipple. He pushes my panties to the side from behind, his finger traveling from my ass to my pussy, rubbing the entrance and collecting all of the juices. I can't help but moan against his skin. With his free hand, he grabs a fistful of my hair, tugging at it to make my head fall back – with my neck now exposed, he finds the opportunity to attack it with his kisses and bites. In the meantime, I unbuckle his belt, moaning every time his teeth sink into my sensitive skin.
His finger keeps teasing my wet entrance, but his other hand finally lets go of my hair and I immediately lean in to kiss his lips hungrily. As I sit up as much as I can, I push his pants down with a bit of his help, doing the same with his boxers as I start rubbing his cock.
"You must be very loyal to that other guy, hm?" he chuckles and wraps his hand around my throat.
"Your other girlfriends haven't been able to satisfy you, it seems. You're about to cum already..." I click my tongue, completely avoiding what he said to me, "..either that, or you're still obsessed with me.." I whisper, grinding down on his dick as he keeps grabbing me by the throat, "do you think they'd like that?"
He chuckles, moaning as soon as he feels the warmth and the wetness of my pussy, "do you think your little bitch will like it when he sees the marks I left for him?" he whispers, tightening the grip around my throat.
I groan, realising my neck must be all bruised up already. This fucking asshole.
Grabbing his dick again, I lower myself down on it as we both moan in unison – he immediately hugs me, his warm fingers digging into the skin of my back as I start to finally move.
"Fucking hell.." he whispers, his face buried in my neck as his hands cup my ass cheeks, guiding me up and down on his cock.
"Fuck.. Chris.." I moan loudly, one hand around him and the other one pressing against the car window, leaving a mark behind.
"Baby.. like that.." he mutters and I can feel myself clenching around him as soon as he calls me that.
He takes my breasts in his hands, squeezing them gently and kissing them with every chance he gets. I can feel him throbbing and I know it is almost time.
He immediately licks his fingers and presses them on my clit, making me stop my movements and tremble, my eyes roll to the back of my head.
"Don't stop. Keep going." he orders and I do exactly that. My burning thighs don't make it easy, especially in his goddamn car, but I don't care. As soon as I start moving up and down his dick again, his fingers start moving.
"Chris.. Chris, please.." I moan, gasping every time he picks up the pace. My breasts bounce with every movement, both of my hands now are on his shoulders supporting myself as I feel myself getting closer and closer.
"I wanna feel it, cum on me." he moans and his touch on my clit becomes as gentle as it can, and that's when I lose it. Once I come down from my high, he pulls out and cums all over my belly, almost shouting my name as he squeezes his eyes shut and grips my hips so hard that I'm sure it'll leave bruises behind.
It takes a while for me to start breathing normal again – and at the same time, I was afraid of what was going to happen when all of this stopped. But for now, I am trying to live in the moment as much as I can; he holds me in his arms tightly, I can feel his heartbeat and his breath tickling my hair, and I can swear I feel his fingertips caressing my back, drawing invisible circles on the skin.
I almost want to cry as he holds me close, I am so overwhelmed with emotions I didn't know I still had in me, that my hands start shaking.
"There's no one else. Only you." I whisper against his shoulder, my cheek pressed against it.
He takes a moment to respond, but he eventually does, "no other lipsticks for me either. Only yours." he whispers back.
This is what happens all the time ever since we parted ways – I call him, we have sex. He sees me outside, we have sex. We are ruthless, merciless, ready to tear each other apart without thinking of the consequences. So when we're finished, and all the hatred and lust is gone, what's left is two vulnerable, broken hearts and a love for each other that once existed.
I don't know how to react at his words. I feel relieved but I also feel angry, I feel hurt. Everything all at once.
"Come on." he says and makes me lean back against the dashboard. He grabs some baby wipes he keeps in his car and starts cleaning up my belly, my thighs, everywhere. He cleans himself up as well and throws them away in the little bin inside the car. He fixes my panties and my dress as well (as much as he can).
He tries to make me get up, but I stay in place. He looks at me but I don't move an inch, "can I ask you something?" I muster up the courage to ask.
"What is it?" he sighs, he knows something heavy is coming.
"Why are you so cold all the time?" he furrows his eyebrows at my question, and he looks like he is about to say a million reasons why what I just asked was stupid, "..so cold, playing it cool all the time, as if nothing happened." I say and I almost regret it.
"Are you fucking serious? What did you expect? You broke up with me, yet you still wanna have sex with me. Do you want me to be all lovey-dovey with you?" he narrows his eyes and I bite the inside of my cheek.
He's correct – what did I really expect? I vividly recall the day I ended our relationship; he was devastated, it was like something shifted within us since then. I was devastated, too. But the decision to break up felt necessary and inevitable. Our hectic schedules kept us apart for days on end. And being the jealous toxic assholes that we both are, this never ended well; it drove me nuts, I had to end it. However, ending the relationship doesn't mean my love for him ceased; on the contrary, I'll never stop loving him. And as for the sex.. well, it's pretty self-explanatory; he's the only one who knows what I like and what I don't. His touch is the only thing I knew for years. And that was the only way I could be close to him. I might've regretted that decision. Might've.
"No. But I would at least expect you to be respectful towards me, we were together for so long." I look down at my trembling fingers, there's pain in my voice.
"Yeah, well, do you know what else would be respectful? You, owning up to the decision you fucking made for the both of us." he's staring into my eyes, "when you break up with someone, especially when you've been with them for a long ass time, you don't go back to them. No matter what the situation is. That's what's respectful. But can you handle that?"
I don't know what to say. And I hate the fact that he's right – I know I fucked up.
"I don't think I can handle that, no." I say truthfully, my voice feels small and now I feel small too, in front of him.
"Yeah, well, that's your fucking problem now." he leans back against the passenger seat and clears his throat.
"Why do you come back?" I whisper, fearing the answer.
"You said it yourself that day. It's the only way to have you at the moment. And I'm taking it." now there's pain in his voice, "but do you realise how toxic that is? That's draining us way more than our schedule did." he runs his fingers through his hair and looks out of the window.
"So what are we supposed to do?" I ask. I feel so dumb.
"As I said. Own up to your decision. I never wanted to break up with you, which is why I never did. You should be the one who stops any contact between us. Not me. If I could, I would, trust me on this one." there's an emptiness in his eyes that I can not quite comprehend what it means. It doesn't let me see through him like I usually do.
"Chris.. damn it, I can't." I whisper, tears fill up my eyes but he's not having any of it.
"No, fuck off. You're fucking selfish." he's getting angry now, the vein in his neck is popping out, hands turning into fists and his knuckles turning white.
Fuck. It seems like everything I say is wrong. I want to just scream and cry and run away.
"I am not selfish, Chris. I am stupid.." I can't stop the tears that fill up my eyes, "..I never wanted to end things with you, I promise. I thought that.. that was the only way for us to calm the fuck down.. we were jealous, and crazy, and toxic." I let my hands fall on his lap.
"And what we're doing now is not toxic? How do you think I feel coming back to you after you broke up with me, just so we can fuck and tell each other we hate each other?" his jaw is clenched and his eyes are turning lighter. He's about to cry.
"I am sorry, Chris. I cannot imagine that, no.. I just.. I made a mistake.. and I am deeply sorry. I am paying for it as well.. this whole time, I really thought you just didn't care.. otherwise I would've made a move way sooner." I explain as much as I can, I am fully crying now.
He's holding back as much as he can – he collects me in his arms for yet another comforting hug when he notices I practically can't breathe, "first of all, breathe for me, okay? I need you to be calm so we can solve this." he rubs my back soothingly and my heart almost jumps out of my chest, because that's exactly who I fell in love with. That's the Chris I knew.
He does make me calm down way faster than I thought. I wipe away my tears and collect a single tear that left his eye as well.
"I love you. I always will." I whisper, cupping his cheeks.
"You know I love you too." his voice is very low, "I cannot stop loving you."
"Do you want to try again?" I whisper timidly, "I will try my best to make you trust me again." I say and I mean it.
"Pretty girl.." he mumbles, grabbing my chin gently, caressing it, "..you better try your hardest, hm?" he whispers and I nod like a little kid, "I promise to make more time for us, we deserve it. You deserve it."
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beenbaanbuun · 4 months
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emo!mingi
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im writing something big rn but for the time being, i can’t get the fact that mingi is a certified! emo off of my mind… like ever….
it’s all i think about and as an emo/metal girlie myself, i can’t help but think about mingi fucking you to his personal horny emo/metal playlist.
bc i can guarantee he has one. like the man said one of his favourite songs was dance dance by fall out boy??? like i can just imagine him taking the lyrics to that song a little too personally, stripping you bare on his mattress, putting you on your front and kissing down your naked spine. pete wentz was sooo right when he wrote that song… mingi does want sympathy in the form of you crawling into bed with him…
and i’m sorry, if that man ever listens to death of peace of mind by bad omens??? oh that man would be DONE. FINISHED!! because how is he supposed to hear that song without you popping into his head. memories of him folding you in half as he fucks into you, mascara tears streaming down your face as you cry out for him. chanting his name over and over again like a mantra… it’s like that song was written about you.
and that man has eaten you out one too many times to K.M.B by nova twins… he gets so pussy drunk and just goes dumb between your legs while the music degrades him and calls him out for what he really is. there really isn’t much going on between his eyes once he gets even a hint of your pussy juices. literally turns into a pretty puppy that exists solely for your pleasure, and you’re okay with that…
and i just know that this man goes fucking i n s a n e when he hears the first note of a deftones song. imagine him listening to my own summer (shove it) and just ramming into you. he’d have you pinned down as he almost completely loses himself, thrusting hard and sensual, trying so desperately to hold on to his last thread of sanity. trying so hard not to snap completely and let himself go absolutely feral on you. he wants to, so bad actually, but for the sake of you being able to walk the next day, he holds back… barely.
but like, we also know this man is a giggly baby half the time. like he’s such a princess and i refuse to believe that every single time you have sex with him, he’s completely serious. like imagine he’s trying to be but then the playlist switches songs and it’s a fucking limp bizkit song or something. like it just switches the mood entirely because how is he supposed to fuck you when fred durst is singing rollin’ directly in his ear. like you’re not telling me this man won’t collapse on top of you in a fit of giggles, rigid dick still pressed inside of you as he tries to contain his laughter in your ear. and you just slap his shoulder or something because what the fuck is LIMP BIZKIT doing in his sex playlist?!?!?!?
i’m so sorry, but emo mingi DOES THINGS TO ME!!!!! like it’s all i can think about at any given point in time and i need people to understand that this is my roman empire!!!
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souperbloom · 7 months
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being in love. [A.I.]
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loosely based on lyrics of the song with the same title, by Wet Leg.
roadie! reader x Ashton
in which you realize your feelings for your boss are a lot more detrimental than you thought they were.
this was supposed to be short and i went overboard. oops! enjoy my first post :^)
CONTENT WARNINGS: tension/slight mental angst, mentions of weed smokin', sex in a somewhat public place/exhibitionism, teasing, fingering(f!receiving), dirty talk, degradation, straight up p in v, insinuation of a creampie, porn with plot basically, filth, filth, FILTH (there is something seriously wrong with me).
WORDCOUNT: 7.9k
⋆⭒˚。⋆
You couldn’t fucking stand him.
As much as you wanted to believe that statement, your heart, mind, and soul found every which way to make you believe otherwise.
The days you spent with him dragged on. His over the top personality was like a vacuum cleaner that sucked every ounce of life out of you.
And yet, despite your annoyance with his ability to charm his way towards your demise, the days without him felt like a lifetime.
Since the first time you and Ashton hooked up, all you were able to think about, after the fact, were the things that you really shouldn’t have been.
Almost every night without missing a beat, you’d lie awake in bed; staring off at the ceiling through your post-show exhaustion and reminiscing on the hours you’ve spent with him. Sneaking off between down times and show times. For a quick and casual fuck.
You’d think about his terrible jokes, the little speckles of brown lost between the hues of green in his eyes, or his ability to make you feel like nothing in the best possible way.
You thought about them. You thought about him. All in hopes that one day, you’d think about him so hard that he would just vanish.
It was reverse psychology, you thought, a way to turn that fluttering feeling you get when you’re around him into something a little less existential, and more like you had both originally intended.
Something more casual.
You didn’t like the fact that he had this effect on you. He was about as brutish and irritating as the day is long. When it was just the two of you, you wished more than anything that he would stop being so damn’ sweet and charismatic. The thought of him calling you nicknames and whispering sweet nothings in your ear made you want to curl up and die.
But the vital organ pumping blood through your veins begged to differ.
Whenever he was around, the pounding of your heart against your ribcage was so deafening, you were almost certain that he could hear it.
It felt strange to wake up, to lie down, to close your eyes and think about anything else. You couldn’t even eat without the thought of him stirring up nausea in your stomach. It was almost as if nothing you did could satisfy you. Nothing you did was right.
Because any time without him felt so wrong.
There were moments in which you wondered whether or not he could feel it too. You'd catch him staring at you from across the dressing room, his eyes lingering down your frame for a millisecond longer than normal.
But you're never quite able to figure it out. To figure him out. He was a thousand piece puzzle, and you were stuck looking for the last piece between the couch cushions.
"Yo, earth to Y/N. Did we lose ya' again?"
Your trance is broken by the sound of Calum's voice. You had been so wrapped up in your own pity-party that you had completely forgotten that you were in the middle of a conversation.
"Jeez, are we really that boring?" Luke laughs out, leaning back in his seat, "I thought our conversation about green tea was quite compelling."
"Sorry, sorry..." You try to snap yourself out of whatever God forsaken rut you've dug yourself into, covering up the awkward silence with the clearing of your throat. "...I guess I don't like green tea as much as I thought I did."
"I'm with Y/N on this one. Green tea is fucking disgusting." Michael comes to your rescue with his reply, which practically had you kissing his shoes as a thank you for saving my ass.
"You guys clearly have no taste. It's simple." Luke shrugs, taking a sip of his ice water. "I know if Ashton was here he'd be on our side, right Cal?"
Calum nods his head, "Speaking of Ashton... where the fuck is he? He said he'd meet us..." he pauses his sentence to look at his phone, "...like, an hour ago."
The pit of your stomach lurches at Calum's observation. He was right. Ashton had said he'd be down in the lounge... after he took a quick shower.
But then again, a quick shower was one of those double entendres in you and Ashton's world. Was he waiting for you? Did you misread his subtle glance after he walked right past you when you tried to hand him his water?
Or maybe that wasn't the case. Maybe you’re just overthinking things.
Maybe he just looked at you because he's your boss and you're his roadie; who he just so happens to fuck from time to time.
That's all it was. That's all it ever will be.
"I can go look for him?" You blurt, immediately wanting to smack yourself in the face for sounding so small.
"You don't have to do that, Y/N. He'll find his way down eventually." Michael sighs.
"He's like a ghost, dude... He disappears for hours. Doesn't answer his phone. Then suddenly, POOF, he appears out of thin air. It's fuckin' witchcraft, I think..."
Calum's comment earns a roaring laugh from the rest of the guys, but you weren't at all laughing. You were too busy debating walking out of the door and hoping they wouldn't notice you were gone.
"I don't think I believe in ghosts..."
Another dumbass conversation ensues.
"Are you kidding?! Since when did you stop believing in ghosts?!" Luke seems genuinely offended by Michael's admission.
And yet, you were stuck there. Wanting to rip your hair out as a giant cloud of sex-driven frustration rained down on you.
"Speaking of ghosts," you can't help but interject, speaking a little louder than you had originally anticipated, "I think I’m gonna go look for Ashton. He's probably off haunting the bar down in the lobby…"
"Well, if you insist," Calum says, saluting you, "good luck, ghost hunter."
As you exited the lounge with no issue and let the boys be boys, you thought to yourself.
Hm, getting out of there was a lot easier than I had anticipated.
But what you hadn't anticipated was the sheer speed in which your feet would pound against the floorboards once you started off down the hall. For you knew just where to look for him.
You were on a mission. A mission to find Ashton, in hopes that he could be the one to free you of the confines of your frustration. In the best way you both knew how.
Once you made it to the elevator corridor, you had to take a moment. To collect yourself and think... what the fuck are you doing?
Did you really think that fucking Ashton would get your mind off of the romantic connection you so desperately craved in him? Did you really think this was the best idea you've ever had?
The answer was no. You knew that this whole ordeal would dig your metaphorical grave ten feet deeper. But you honestly didn't have the energy to care. This witch hunt has turned into merely a way to get off.
Just like God intended.
You step into the elevator, already knowing your way around this hotel like the back of your hand after only being stationed here for a few days.
As the elevator made its' trip up to the rooftop, your senses were heightened. The elevator dings sounded like sirens and the climbing of floors was pushing down on you, making you feel as though the oxygen in your lungs was being forced out by the altitude change.
Your symptoms couldn't be explained by anything other than Ashton, as much as you hated to admit it. It was typical for you to feel this way whenever you answered to his beckoning call.
Just a quick and casual fuck. Quick. And casual.
You tried to focus your mind on those two words. Forcing your conscious out of habit and tricking yourself into believing them.
But as soon as the elevator door slid open, those two words were nothing but dust in the wind.
All you could see in the darkness of the twinkling summer sky was the curve of Ashton's shoulder, highlighted slightly by the patio lights. He was looking out past the glass that surrounded the rooftop, off into the New York City skyline.
You froze up upon seeing him, barely managing to step across the elevator threshold without vomiting all over your shoes.
There were remnants of smoke lingering in the air around him, a familiar, earthy smell touching your nose upon piecing your two senses together.
Before you could tell your brain to step forward, Ashton's head turns to face you. You finally get a look at him, a good look at him.
And fuck, did he look divine.
His hair was partially wet, rogue curls hanging lowly on his forehead with that post show gleam still laced throughout his features. He scratches at the stubble on his chin, a droplet of water dripping down his temple upon doing so.
"Y/N," he leered, the blank expression that once painted his face now lifting into a smirk.
"Ashton," you reply; although small talk is the last thing you wished to be having at the moment.
"Where've ya' been?" he asks, leaning his arm to rest against the back of the couch he was sprawled out on.
"The lounge... The guys are down there waiting for you, y'know." You try to divert the attention away from yourself. But you knew for a fact that you were the only thing on his mind right now.
His eyes scan your body. Up, and down. Up, and down. Like he was stuck in some sort of trance. "Well, that's funny, isn't it. Because I've been up here… waiting for you."
You fuckin’ knew it.
"And how was I supposed to know that?"
He pauses, thumbing at his chin, "I'm not sure, actually... 'Thought you would've had me figured out by now."
It was taking everything inside of you not to run over there and smack the shit out of him for being such a snarky asshole. But you were well aware of the dynamic between you two; this type of banter wasn't out of the ordinary.
"You just gonna stand there and stare at me, honey?" Ashton remarks, calling you by that nickname that makes your stomach hurt and revealing his hand from behind the couch; a lit and half-smoked joint plucked between his fingertips.
Without another word, you walk over to him, slowly starting to display more and more of his body laid out on the couch.
He had on a loosely fitting Hawaiian shirt, one of the ones with only half the normal amount of buttons, and a pair of grey sweatpants. To contradict the tone of the outfit and make it totally clear to you where his head was at when he put them on.
The Hawaiian shirt hung off of his shoulders, revealing his collarbone decked out in beaded necklaces and braided silver chains.
You wanted more than anything to take those chains between your teeth as he hovered over you, pinning you down and fucking into you like you were the last two people on Earth.
Sidetracked, Y/N. You’re getting sidetracked.
When it came to hooking up, you and Ashton had discovered a natural rhythm. A routine, of sorts, consisting of unspoken demands and a whole lot of Ashton holding the reins.
No need to give orders, or ask for more. You both knew what you wanted and exactly how to get it.
But that routine so deeply instilled in you had seemed to vanish as soon as you stepped in front of him.
Your bottom lip was caught between your teeth as you teetered from side to side, just admiring Ashton in all of his residually high glory. You wanted to say something, but couldn't bring yourself to say anything else but these two words:
"Fuck me."
His eyes widen in shock. Amusement, even. The joint between his fingers dwindling down to the roach and leaving ashes in the wind as he lets out a quiet chuckle.
"Y/N, I—"
You cut him off abruptly, "It wasn't a fucking question, Ash."
You didn't mean to come off so bossily, but at this point you were willing to do anything to forget about the weight that came with having alleged feelings for him.
Even if that something was letting him fuck you until you cried.
"Right here?"
"Yes." Your heart was racing.
"Right now?"
"Yes." Reminiscent of a heart attack.
And then he does something that makes you even more frustrated than you were before this entire ordeal. He looks at you, without a care, and just… shrugs.
“Works for me.”
You hated that. Oh, you fucking hated that. That cocky, ‘devil-may-care’ attitude. It gets you so worked up that you consider winding up your fist and cracking him the jaw.
But you don’t end up going through with your desires to hurt him at all. Instead, you’re pouncing at him. Scrambling to straddle his comfortably spread legs as he pulls you by your cheeks into a heated kiss.
You sigh upon feeling your lips on his, Ashton just as well. The both of you tend to melt into each other’s palms when your lips connect; which is another reason as to why your head was all fucked up and sideways in the first place.
As the kiss between you grows more primal, you find yourself taking out your frustrations and feelings on Ashton’s bottom lip. You sink your teeth into the soft flesh, tugging it down gently towards his chin.
His hands fumble for the button of your jeans, grunting lowly as he struggles to get it undone.
"Fuck— Get these… Get these damn things off…" The remark flies past his lips, and yours, in a disgruntled huff. You do as you’re told, momentarily disconnecting from him.
When you rise to your feet, being held up by weak, unreliable knees, he looks up. That face of amusement was still painted on, mocking you.
Was he still thinking about your desperate demand? Or was he just enjoying the view?
"Someone’s a little greedy tonight," he says, blowing out a breath and running a hand through his fresh, now sweaty, curls.
"I don’t wanna hear shit from you. You’re the greediest motherfucker alive." You tease back at him, undoing your zipper and shimmying out of your jeans.
"I’ll take that as a compliment coming from you, Miss ‘I never know what I want and I need Ashton to tell me’.”
"I knew what I wanted tonight, didn’t I?" His threats were empty, but you were loving it. You loved to tease, loved to be teased.
"That is true,” he sighs, looking down at the roach he had flicked onto the floor. He stomps it out with his steel-toed boot. "But that’s, what, one time—? Out of the however-the-fuck many times we’ve slept together?"
“You’re making this a lot more complicated than it has to be, Ash. Fuckin’ live a little.”
You were now in your t-shirt and underwear out on this rooftop, telling Ashton to live a little while you’re practically caving in on yourself in embarrassment.
"But, honey... why out here? Why right now?" he asks. Genuinely. Almost sweetly.
You didn't want to admit the real reason as to why you were acting so curtly. The embarrassment of sounding desperate and needy was doing numbers on you already.
"Does there always need to be a reason why?"
You cross your arms over your chest, feeling overexposed. But Ashton’s eyes scan down your frame as if there’s no shame left in the world.
"My apologies for seeming hesitant... You know full and well— I’d do you any time, any place.”
"Is that so?” you quip.
"I don’t think you realize how often I think about having you bouncing on my dick while I’m out on stage performing, so— yes, that is so.”
The way he admits this all so casually makes your stomach turn. You knew he was dirty, but not this dirty. You just assumed he knew that there was a time and place for all of these thoughts.
And the fact that he was thinking about you at all wasn’t making this any easier.
"Well?” Ashton snaps your mind out of the gutter. Ironic.
"Well what?"
"You just gonna stand there in your underwear?"
Oh. Right.
After a moment of blundering awkwardness, you walk towards him timidly, feeling as if your soul was freeing itself from your body as he extends his arms out to hold you.
You make your way back into his lap, digging your knees into the cushions comfortably beside his thighs and letting him run his blistered palm down the side of your face.
His bloodshot eyes find yours like a magnet. Your breath is trapped somewhere in your larynx as his hand continues its journey to your neck.
You felt like you were about to burst at the seams, the tension and friction building between you was like a bottle rocket, ready to set off into the sky.
And with that, exactly on cue, your heart is racing, as he cups your throat between ring finger and thumb. Your rattling ribcage was telling him all he needed to know when the pads of his fingers began to squeeze gently.
You close your eyes, "Ashton..."
"Y/N..." He repeats matching your hushed tone, swallowing the lump in his throat as your noses brush together.
His nose grazes yours with fragility and tenderness, his touch as light as a feather. But you couldn’t stand the space between you two. The clear disconnect between your lips and his.
He seemed to be lingering longer than usual. You found yourself wondering what the hell was going on in his head. Since you had clearly told him what you wanted a long time ago.
"Why aren’t you kissing me?" you ask quietly, still so close to his face that his features had gone blurry.
"Could ask you the same question, honey." His breath fans across your face and suddenly you’re reverting back to your old ways. Back before you were so— demanding.
“Well, not to be clichè, but— you’re meant to take the lead here, Ash.” You say it as if it were obvious, but he disagrees.
"Clearly not tonight."
Now, you were stuck.
You came up here to find him for one reason, and one reason only. To fuck him… to get your mind off of him.
But that all sounded a bit complicated, though. Didn’t it?
"Y/N…" He says your name again, reminiscent of pure honey dripping off of his tongue.
"Hm...?"
God, what is with him and saying your name?
"Is there something on your mind?"
You cock your head, "Would you still fuck me if I said no?..."
Ashton’s eyebrows shoot to his forehead.
"…Even if I wasn’t telling the whole truth?"
He backs away from you, giving you a better look at the confused expression laminated across his face.
"You’re a real card, aren’t’cha?”
His confusion melts into a smile, as he removes his hand from your neck to match his other at your waist. "You know I’d never force anything out of you, Y/N. But— just so you know… Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom."
You can’t help but roll your eyes at his terrible cliché, finding your hand lost in his unruly curls. "You’re such an old man."
He winces, "God— please… Don’t put that picture in my head… It’s killing the mood."
In the brief moment of silence and sweetness shared between you and him, it was taking everything inside of you not to scream at the top of your lungs.
You wanted to scream; Ashton Irwin, I am in love with you. Ashton Irwin, I am in love with you… over and over again.
Until it didn’t mean a thing.
"Not gonna lie to you, honey— M’gettin’ impatient." Ashton lets out a deep sigh, his eyes snapping you out of a downward spiral.
"Right, right. I’m sorry—"
You cut yourself short by reconnecting your lips to his. You missed this feeling, even after only a few minutes; something inside of you dies every time you pull away from him.
He pulls your waist into his torso, pushing you down and grinding you against the already hardened length in his sweatpants. The wildly thin material left no room for the imagination, as it was now creating friction against your wet panties.
"Fuckin’ hell, Y/N—" Ashton mumbles through your lips, and you just sigh. You sigh into him like putty in his hands, creating a rhythm of swiveling hips and only furthering the fireworks that were occurring in the pit of your stomach.
He removes one hand from your waist, blindly finding the waistband of your underwear like it was some mindless, natural instinct.
Muscle memory is a damned thing.
Detaching your lips from his, you whine. "Ash, please—"
You wince internally at how needy you sounded. How desperate and completely disheveled you’ve become at his touch. Yet the blistered pads of his fingers continued to trace slow, taunting patterns along your bikini line.
But as your breathing becomes more erratic, Ashton reads you like the book he already knows so well. Front page to back, cover to fucking cover.
He dips two fingers down into your underwear, attaching them to your sensitive bud.
You writhe above him, but he keeps you grounded, anchoring his hand on your waist with his forehead pressed against yours.
His eyes flutter closed in delight. "So fuckin’ wet for me, yeah? This’ all for me, honey?"
It felt like he was mocking you. Of course it was for him. It was all for him. Anything you ever did was for him. Any feelings you’ve felt, thoughts you’ve had, stories you’ve told… they were all for him.
You can only bring yourself to nod.
"Good, good…" he sighs, breathlessly, "Gonna’ take me so easy tonight…"
He continues his rhythm. One finger circling your clit while the other ghosts over your entrance. Heavenly sighs fall from your lips. You want to close your eyes, you want to enjoy the sensation as it were.
But you just couldn’t look away.
"Look at me, Ash."
A bout of confidence rolls through your veins and you aren’t quite sure where it was coming from, but you had no complaints. Your foreheads being pressed together was making you antsy.
His features were still blurry through glossy eyes, which you didn’t really like. You wanted to get a good look at him before you tried to dismiss these feelings, and pretend as though he meant nothing.
Nothing at all.
He does as he’s told, and backs away from you. His teeth sunk into his bottom lip as he took in every single feature, etching, God knows what else, on your face.
"You know how fuckin’ beautiful you are, Y/N?— Always so good for me… like an angel… heaven sent."
Those words unleash something inside of you. Tears begin to brim at your lower lash line and you’re suddenly reminded of the feeling that you are so desperately trying to forget.
Existing in this world with him felt so strange. You truly believe he was sent down to Earth to smite you and haunt your memories.
And hearing him call you an angel didn’t help a damn thing.
The words you utter next come out just above a whisper. Your throat feels gravelly, and dry. Like you hadn’t drank water in years.
"Fuck me, Ashton. Just— fuck me, please—"
"M’gettin' there," he grunts, ignoring your plea and still chipping away at your decorum with his bare hands.
You let out a loud, high pitched mewl as you feel his two fingers now inside of you. He always took his time when it came to pleasuring you, always making sure that you’d be the one getting off first, even if he didn’t get the chance to.
Now, you’ve found yourself thinking in depth about just how thoughtful he is.
Jesus fuck, give it a rest.
"You know how much I adore those sweet sounds you make. But you’ve gotta be a tad bit quieter for me, alright angel?"
Oh god, you thought, this nickname better not become a recurring thing. You weren’t even sure you’d be able to fathom the thought of him thinking of you so highly.
"Okay, oh— fuck, Ashton"
Your brain was moving at a mile a minute. While trying to be quiet and simultaneously losing your head in the process, a smirk slides across Ashton’s face. He picks up on the signs, he notices your movements on his lap becoming more and more frenzied.
You knew you were close. He knew you were close.
Oh, of course he fucking did. He knew you like the back of his hand.
"Ash, I’m close… Please—" You begged empty pleas, finding stability with your hands clasped around his neck as you jerk forward with that fluttering feeling.
"I feel it comin’. Bein’ so— so good… C’mon— give it to me."
His two fingers thrust in and out of you while a third circled your clit. You wanted to scream, but he told you to be quiet. You wanted to kiss him, but you couldn’t pull yourself away from the purely concentrated, almost sadistic look in his eyes.
"That’s my girl… that’s my fuckin’ girl…"
The sounds of your wetness boom through your head along with the sounds of his praise, slowly meshing into a garish ringing in your ear. The butterflies once encased in the pit of your stomach had set free, fluttering along your body as Ashton’s rhythmic fingers come to a slowdown.
"Fuck!" You cry out, as your body collapses into his chest.
You could feel his ribcage shake with laughter, as he takes that free hand of his to rub your back. Your head is tossed over his shoulder as you manage your breathing.
"…Is that all you’ve got in you tonight?"
You could barely hear his voice over the ringing in your ears, as you heave like this was the last breath you’d ever take. He then removes his fingers from inside of you, causing you to jolt, still sensitive from the electricity coursing through your veins just moments before.
"N—no…" You stutter into his neck.
"You sure?"
"Uh-huh."
Your head was still spinning while you tried to cool down. The temperature of your bodies entwined was like a hot stovetop, setting your skin ablaze. But you couldn’t find it in you to lift yourself up from the crook of his shoulder.
You liked it there. It was comfortable. It felt natural.
After a few moments of silence and messy breathing, you lift your head up.
"All good now?" He asks, running a hand down your waist.
"I think so... Almost knocked me out with that one Ash, not gonna lie."
All he does is laugh, before hovering the two fingers he had used to unravel you with in front of the both of your faces.
"See this?" He examines his fingers, still glistening with your secretions, "Is this what I do to you?"
Your jaw falls open slightly, "Wh—"
He takes a moment to think to himself, pushing his lips to the side while you just watched in complete awe.
"…I wonder if my honey girl tastes as sweet as she looks?"
You don’t even have a moment to blink before he takes those two fingers into his mouth. He sucks whatever’s left of you off of his digits, before pulling them out with a pop.
"Mmm," he hums, "Just as I’d imagined… Sweet as fuckin’ honey"
Something inside of you snaps, and you’re suddenly reattaching your lips to his. He moans into you, taken aback by your actions with his hands fumbling to grab your ass and grind you down into him.
"I need— I need you…" You mumble into his lips, not long before he juts his tongue out to run it across your bottom lip.
His stubble scratches against your palms as you grab ahold of his face, trying to ease him into you as if it were even humanly possible to get him any closer.
"Need me t’fuck you, honey? You— you want me that badly?" He asks quickly, sounding out of breath already from the sheer friction of your hips grinding against him. You nod rapidly, and he dips down to kiss your neck to let you know that he heard you loud and clear.
“Please, Ash…" You couldn’t help it, your mind was still reeling, "I need to feel you—"
Your words come out airy and forced, like somebody was squeezing them out of you. But you couldn’t stop yourself no matter how hard you bit down your tongue.
"...Fuck me like I’m worthless… Fuck me like I mean nothing to you at all…"
His head pops up from the crook of your neck, a sardonic look in his eye.
"Say that again for me?"
"…Fuck me like I mean nothing to you, Ashton. Fuck me like I mean nothing at all.”
You couldn’t describe the way his face changed. The way it morphed into something that you weren’t at all used to. It wasn’t sarcastic, no. It wasn’t the usual cheeky grin, either.
You were afraid that you had just dug your grave even deeper this time.
"Stand up." He demands shortly, which brings goosebumps across your arms.
"Stand up?" You repeat, like a goddamn lovesick puppy.
"Stand the fuck up, Y/N."
You do as you’re told, wearily, lifting yourself off of him and rising to your feet. You watch in anticipation, crossing your arms over your chest as he remains sitting.
The dynamic between you two had shifted drastically. It was clear that Ashton was still in charge, only this time, it felt absolutely terrifying.
You wished you hadn’t said anything at all. You wished he had just let you ride him, as you were planning to do. But your emotions gotten the best of you. The thought of caring for him so deeply had actually brought you to spiral out of control.
What you had been longing for, all this time, was about to come true.
With that, you planned to do everything you were told. Each and every single order barked at you was to be followed. You wanted to see what it felt like. What it felt like to feel nothing for a change.
"Walk to the balcony." Another demand. You hesitate, still dealing with a subconscious battle of self. Your heart and brain were going at it like two bulls in the ring.
"Are you— are you gonna come with me?" You find your gaze glued to the patio, feeling as small and as meek as ever.
"Meh, I’ll make my way over eventually."
Fair enough.
You walk over towards the balcony; left only in your thin, grey CREW v-neck and a pair of frilly, sage green underwear.
The fact that Ashton didn’t comment on the color of them made you feel a bit discouraged. Green was his favorite color, after all. You at least thought he’d take a moment to appreciate it.
God knows that moment won’t be happening now.
You start to near the glass railing that surrounded the rooftop. But despite your back being turned, you could completely feel his eyes searing bullet holes into your flesh. A chill ran down your spine, uncomfortable with the feeling of being watched, yet enjoying the fact that it was by him.
"Keep walking."
You were getting so close to the glass that it actually started to feel cold, despite the lingering August air.
You also weren’t sure where his head was at. Him having you walk towards the balcony that was completely out-turned and visible to the street below almost felt like he was trying to humiliate you.
But that feeling was quickly washed away when you felt his footsteps behind you.
"You have any idea what you’ve just gotten yourself into, honey?” He inches close to you, close enough to feel the warmth of his body radiating onto your back yet still too far away to touch you.
You swallow the lump forming in your throat. “No… I-I don’t think so…"
You were telling the truth. No, Ashton, you had not a clue what you had just gotten yourself into. The absolute wormhole that you had just unlocked for yourself.
A new way to feel about things. A new way to feel about him.
Another wave of chills runs down your back as he takes the back of his hand and runs it down your shoulder. You wince, wanting nothing more than to turn around and kiss him.
"I didn’t think you had it in you."
"What?" Your voice comes out high pitched. Almost… nervous.
"To order me around like that. To finally buck up n’ tell me how to have my way with ya’… It’s honestly— kind of impressive."
His hand strokes down your arm once again, but this time, you just sigh.
He thinks this is just roleplay.
Little did he know that all of this nagging and bossiness had come from the truest, most integral parts of your soul and your longing to forget about the way your heart beats for him.
"You think so?" You try to gain back your sparkle with a witty reply, "How else can I impress you, Ash?"
All of these words exchanged between you two were said facing away from one another. You hadn’t the energy to care, nor the energy to make this anymore meaningful than it was, or was not, supposed to be.
You’ve finally decided to let go.
"Well, you can start by bending over." He snaps back. He’s always been so quick with his words.
To follow your mantra from before, you do as you’re told, bending over slightly and exposing your bare asscheeks to him. You lean your arms over the glass railing, your wrists going limp in doing so.
"’Like the view?" You ask, sparing him a glance over your shoulder in hopes to get a little more of a rise out of him.
"The view won’t mean much while I’m using you, honey."
Your face grows pale, a rush of static that felt like pinpricks crawls across your body. Jesus fuckin’ Christ, Ashton.
The excitement and rush of it all is now, finally, catching up to you. You were about to have meaningless sex with the person that means the most. In a way, it did feel like roleplay.
Except your role was pretending like you didn’t give a fuck about him.
"Gimme’ your wrist." You hear Ashton bark another command from behind you, along with the shuffling of fabric. Before you could even offer your wrist to him, he’s taking it upon himself to reach up and grab it.
He swiftly pins one of your arms behind your back, making you gasp and teeter on your feet.
"Ashton…" You try to say, but are immediately silenced by his other hand hooking a finger to the waistline of your panties.
"Don’t say another word, Y/N. You’re in no position to talk right now."
Your breath gets caught in your throat, now with your one free hand anchored to the railing. It was all a waiting game, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t extremely turned on by him and his newfound unpredictability.
"I have a job for you." His voice rings in your ears, as he bends down above you to be parallel to your curved back. "…Think you could follow some orders f’me? Just for tonight?"
Just for tonight, you thought. Just for tonight.
You nod at his question. It was the only thing you were capable of doing, anyway.
"You’re gonna take my cock… But I don’t wanna hear a peep from that dirty mouth of yours. One fuckin’ sound and I swear… I’ll send you back downstairs with mascara running down your face and nothin’ to fuckin’ show for it."
You nod again. You were a nodding, blubbering mess.
"Think you could do that for me? Think you could be good enough for me to let you cum again?"
You nod, once again.
"And you told me what you wanted, right? Told me loud and clear how you wanted me to treat you? Out here— where there’s a small chance somebody could walk in on this?"
His pelvis presses against you as he taunts, and you’re left feeling even weaker in the knees.
This time, it wasn’t a nod. It was more of a sob.
"Good, good to know…" He softens his tone, lips now centimeters away from your ear.
"…Now bend the fuck over n’ let me use you like you’re nothing."
In a flash of vibrant colors swirling around the backs of your eyelids, you feel Ashton push your panties aside. He runs two fingers up your damp slit, bringing your face to a pinch.
You were still so sensitive after letting him have his way with you the first time. But you couldn’t fathom going another minute without the feeling of him buried inside of you.
"Please—" You whisper, but only to yourself.
You didn’t want to know what he’d do if he’d heard it.
His next movements were methodical, and slow, like he was a puppeteer playing with your strings. His hands dance along the sides of your hips, moving up to rub the small of your back.
He puffs out a breath, seemingly taking you in from behind.
"You're a fuckin' vision, Y/N... It's too bad you don't want me to treat you that way."
His ceaseless taunting was making your vision go shaky.
But you needed to keep reminding yourself... you fucking asked for it.
"Gonna let me use you, honey? Like my own personal doll... that I can toss around n' rough up... Mmm, 'bet you've been thinking about this for a while, haven't you?"
"Ashton..." You can help but let his name tumble from your lips. But in a flash, his hand is cracking down on your bare asscheek, creating a loud clap that you swore could be heard for miles. You let out a yelp, but quickly clamp your lips shut.
Your skin burns from the contact, your mouth going bone dry.
"What did I fucking say about that mouth of yours, Y/N? Not a fucking peep."
As he guides himself up and down your slit, collecting your juices on his leaky tip, you choke back the tears in your eyes. You still wanted nothing more than to turn around and kiss him, which was just a damned thing.
"So wet f'me... God, I'm in heaven."
It was almost as if each string of sentences that came out of his mouth were traveling in through one ear and right out of the other. I suppose this was your karma for being so demanding.
But this is what you wanted, wasn't it? Even though Ashton's means of 'fucking you like you're worthless' still came with bouts of praise, he couldn't help it. He was only human. Testing the waters for the both of you.
Roleplay.
He traces one last drag along your folds, pushing your panties aside with his tip before suddenly slamming himself into you. You gasp at the sudden feeling of him, your body lurching forward towards the railing as his grip on your wrist grows tighter.
"Jesus fuck—." He groans through bated breath before starting his rhythm of pounding into you.
It starts off slowly. The feeling of him filling you up as your walls clench around him must've felt like heaven to the both of you, for he let out a long, dreamy sigh. The hand that was once toying with the hemline of your lacy panties was now planted on the small of your back, using you as leverage as he slammed his cock deeper with each stroke.
Ashton hums, the sounds of slapping skin now engulfing the air around you. "Fuckin' love this pussy... Like it was fuckin' made for me..."
The air in your lungs started to dissipate, practically leaving you begging for mercy at his expense. Your body jolted with each of his deep thrusts, still trying to stay quiet and do exactly as he had demanded of you.
His grip on your wrist had begun to feel raw, surely to leave you with some kind of marking, reinstating the absolute chokehold he has on you.
"Ash..." You whisper again, as he's grunting and whining from behind you.
"Whose fuckin' pussy is this? Whose fuckin' pussy is this?" He asks the question and you whimper, unable to gather any syllable of a sentence on your tongue.
Suddenly, he releases your wrist, picking up his rhythm of fucking into you. Your arm drops to your side like a ragdoll, as you scramble to balance it next to your other on the railing.
The hand of his that once held your wrist captive had traveled down to meet his other, gripping your waist and digging his blistered fingertips into your flesh.
"Fuck... fuckin' shit, Y/N... Takin' my cock so well..."
Using his hands anchored to your waist, he starts to pull you into him, slamming your hips into his pelvic bone and hitting that sweet spot with every. Single. Stroke.
"Fuck, you’re heavenly…. My sweet, sweet girl…"
At this point in time, you could care less about the semantics of this all.
Although the point of this was for Ashton to have his way with you without a single feeling attached, it seemed as though he couldn’t really help it. He was a blubbering mess of compliments and praise, a true gentleman through and through.
But that was something to think about while you lay awake in bed tonight.
For now, you just decided to live in the moment.
Ashton’s rhythm had grown sloppy. He was awfully close to making you finish for a second time, with each buck of his hips— meanwhile it was taking every last bit of your consciousness to keep yourself quiet. The pit of your stomach squeezed with each primal sound that fell from his plush lips.
"M’gonna cum soon, honey… ‘Gonna fill you up, yeah? Would you like that? Want me t’fill you up?"
Unsure of whether or not to verbalize your consent, you nod. Like a bobble-head on a broken spring.
"That’s my girl. That’s— my fuckin’ girl.”
Despite Ashton’s imminent orgasm, you could only think about two words.
My girl. My girl. My girl
They were flashing around your mind like the billboards in the Manhattan streets below. Each thought of those two words produced vibrant colors behind your eyelids, stars now fogging up the blackness as he slams into you a few more times.
"Gonna' cum, honey... G-Gonna' fill you up, m'kay? Fuck..."
With one final pound into you, the pulsing throbbing of his cock had come to a slowdown. You both let out a collective gasp, as the heat ignited between your bodies had meshed into a warm, fuzzy feeling in your chest.
Ashton collapses onto your back, the front half of his body slicked with sweat and pressing into you. Your breathing had begun to sync up collectively, only for him to pull out of you and make your entire body jolt.
"Fuck, Ashton."
You were finally able to speak again. You had gotten your words back, as well as your confidence. And the feeling of his presence behind you was all you needed to get you there.
He huffs, finally lifting himself off of you. But you lag behind, taking a moment to collect your breathing as he pulls his sweatpants up.
"Jesus Christ, honey. You're a goddamn dream." He chuckles, stepping back and allowing you the space to turn around.
And that you did. Finally faced with that dream he was on about.
Sweaty, messy curls glued and rearranged to his forehead. Glossy, hooded, fucked-out eyes. The fabric of his Hawaiian shirt soaked with the mixing of your sweat and his.
He looked obscene. He looked ethereal. You wanted to tell him how absolutely picturesque he was in that moment. You wanted to give him every gorgeous compliment you could think of.
But you didn't. You couldn't.
So you said this instead.
"...It'd be a dream if you could grab my jeans."
"Don’t be impolite, Y/N. What's the magic word?" He teases, motioning towards your jeans that had been discarded in a pile on the patio.
"Oh, so now you want me to talk, tough guy? After you just fucked the goddamn life out of me?"
He shrugs, "I wouldn't say I fucked the life out of you... If that was the case, you wouldn't be standing upright."
You huff, frustrated, but loving every second of it.
"Just– grab me my damn jeans, Irwin."
He does as he's told, begrudgingly walking the short few feet to grab your jeans as you stand, cross-legged, bare-assed, with your back against the glass.
"Your majesty," he bows, holding your pants out on his arm like a knight with your crown.
"Thank you."
As you put on your jeans, Ashton watches you. With those whiskey, honeypot eyes. Scanning down every inch of you as you put one leg in, then the other.
"If it were up to me, I'd send you back down pants-less."
"Yeah, right." You scoff, reverting back to your old ways of a thumping heart and a pain in your chest, "You know how much trouble I'd be in?"
"Trouble by who? I'm your boss, aren't I?"
You puff, pulling up the zipper of your jeans, "You don't act like it."
"Want me to start then?" He quips.
"...No. Absolutely not."
Ashton tosses you a smile, not long before he's holding out his arms.
"That's what I thought, honey," he motions for you with his hands, "Now c'mere."
Without even thinking, almost as if it were rehearsed, you spin around, falling backwards into his arms. He wraps himself around you, broad biceps squeezing your shoulders like a butterfly in its' cocoon.
The Manhattan night sky was twinkling with lights and stars. You stare out into it, and he does too.
As you stand cradled in his arms with the lingering of pitiful, degrading sex still in the air, you sat in your thoughts for a moment.
What happened tonight couldn’t have been a mistake. You had been speaking it into existence for so long, that it finally became a reality. From the way he so passionately kissed you, to the way he so effortlessly dropped everything to fuck you like you were worthless. Just like you had asked. Just liked you had intended.
But you knew, despite everything that happened tonight, that not a single thing would change. 
Your heart would still flutter out of your ribcage whenever he walked by. You’d still answer his calls late at night, or spare him passing glances in the concert halls.
You’d still come to meet him, no matter when or where. All with that same, God awful weight on your chest.
It all made you feel terrible. Everything about him made you feel terrible.
But you were willing to get used to that feeling.
To be completely honest with yourself…
You kind of liked it. 
It felt like being in love
⋆⭒˚。⋆
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★  𝐆𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐓𝐎 𝟓𝟎𝟓. + 𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐍 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐑
masterlist. / taglist. / tip jar. synopsis. jealousy is a terrible disease, and you and Eren are both suffering from a severe case of it.
✧. ┊    notes. back on the eren d rider train I need more fics of him BAD like there is a shortage of bad bitches that write for eren on my feed and I need that to be fixed real soon. | — feedback is always welcomed & don't forget to reblog 🤍
✧. ┊    word count. 3.2k (23 min read).
✧. ┊    genre and warnings. +18 nsfw under the cut. minors dni | slight eren/mikasa in the beginning | (fr)enemies | established relationship | hurt/comfort | miscommunication | misunderstandings | sexual tension | jealousy | post-break up | make up sex | porn with feelings | grinding | fingering | unprotected sex | cowgirl | riding | hair pulling | we ignore typos here | title inspired by this song.
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EREN WAS CONVINCED you were batshit crazy, that would be the only reason why your brain would always find some new reason to push him away enough to have him chase after you like you had a pretty pink leash around his neck hooked to a collar with his name on it. 
You would always manage to push his buttons just enough to tip him off, and in return, you weren’t the type to just sit back and let some man yell at you cause he certainly was not your father nor your mother.
The arguments you two would be involved in usually led to very amazing angry sex, clearing out a grace period enough to last until the next time you chose to push his buttons.
Well, this time it was different—at least that was your claimed reasoning for telling your friends why you and Eren were on another one of your famous relationship breaks. 
This one happened so fast that Eren wasn’t even sure what the hell he was talking about until you stormed out of his apartment and blocked his number for an entire week, holding onto the smallest things that reminded him of your existence. 
Wincing every time he would see your post on your Instagram story all dressed up and going out with your friends looking so unfazed. Maybe this time it actually was different, and the thought of that scared the absolute shit out of Eren. The heavy feeling of the thought of you losing you left with him a constantly collapsing moping pit forming in his stomach.
It was settled between his friends that they wouldn't let him mope around his place alone any longer, tired of hearing and depressed, mentioning your name on his lips, convincing him enough to coax him out of his apartment littered with reminders of you to hang out at some house party.
What those said friends failed to mention was that you would be there as well, with about seventy people scattered from the front yard to the pool in the back with music raging so loud he could feel the vibration from where he sat lounging watching you from his seat on the back porch.
He was supposed to be having a good time, getting messed up enough to not remember your name. Yet there he was, sitting slouched a few feet away from you, his heart on his sleeve. 
A blunt caught between his lips, minding his business as best as he possibly could, but it was just so hard to believe that he could hear the familiar pitch of your laughter filtered through the music.
"Dude," Connie sighs, interrupting Eren’s growing annoyance, his attention yanking away from where you stood, hugging up a little too closely for comfort to the smirking Armin. 
Eren hands the blunt over with a groan, his legs spreading comfortably and shifting back to lean with his back against the patio chair.
With his head resting on the headrest pillow, he closes his eyes tightly, praying for his high to hit him like a truck so fucking soon, wishing for just one night where he wouldn't have to deal with his annoying emotions for you. "Shit, my bad man, I didn't even know that she would be here." 
Connie rests his hand on Eren’s shoulder, helping ground him back down to earth. "But hey, are you gonna be alright?" The question lingered in the stale air before Eren could process the rigid tone behind it, his eyes fluttering open to Connie eyeing down someone from across the yard with a knowing horny spark in his eye, knowing that his friend was a natural-born player and that it would be just so unfair to hold him back from his natural element.
"Yeah, yeah, go ahead, man, I’ll be here." forcing a tight grin from his lips, Eren’s hand waving away his friend with a coaxing hand. "All alone.." he sighed under his breath once Connie had finally stalked away, leaving the dark-haired brunette to sit with his own flooding thoughts.
The sight in front of him making him feel as if he was witnessing a kamikaze from just a few steps away from how hard his heart was throbbing watching you completely ignore his existence as if you weren't just sprouting I love yous and kissing all over each other not even a few weeks ago.
He needs to move to get you out of his sight before the swallowing feeling can take up his entire mood and ruin his high. Stumbling around the large crowd of people, he parted through the crowd, finding the unknown kitchen counter that was decorated with enticingly labeled cheap liquor bottles and mixers that were calling his name. 
He hadn't even managed to get one cup down before the slush of his drink was met with the white of his graphic t-shirt, a curse hidden under his breath turning ready to spit the first insult on his mind he could spout from the large cloud of frustration festering from his annoyance only to be cut off. 
"Oh shit, I'm so sorry, dude." His attacker was a very apologetic and cute woman, with short dark hair, warm olive skin, and a very bold red bra peeking through the white cropped cami she wore, catching his attention embarrassingly quick enough for him to forget that it was better to actually make eye contact when speaking to another person.
His first initial words were punched back into his throat, a lazy smile taking their place instead. "It's already, uh, the drink tasted like shit anyways." He nervously chuckled, like he couldn't really help the nervousness that waved over him standing in the presence of a pretty girl who had introduced herself quite cheerily as Mikasa. 
If you had told him a few hours ago when he first arrived that he would actually be having fun, let alone sitting with some random girl in his lap, Eren would have called you crazy, yet there he was genuinely grinning ear to ear face to face with Mikasa, who had made it her personal mission to make Eren have a much better night than he was. 
The two getting awfully close in such a short span of time, sitting down clinging onto each other, sprouting out about absolutely nothing important but the genuine want to talk to each other, not to mention that It helps that Eren absolutely finds her stunning, their bodies sharing warmth sitting so close, it was only natural for the flushed feeling to take over with the rake of her nails tangling in his shaggy mullet.
He couldn't even use drinking as an excuse, babysitting the same drink she had remade for him as an apology for spilling the last one. There was really no real reason why he had suddenly leaned in and caught his lips against hers so hungrily. 
It doesn't help that Mikasa kisses him back with the same amount of eager roughness, practically straddling him on top of his lap at this point, the two heavily making out in the open.
With hands wandering, Eren reaches out a hold around her hips, his mind betraying him just a bit, not being able to fully push away the comparison to your figure. The thought makes him react with a wince, parting from the kiss with his tongue dragging over his parted lips.
Mikasa leans back, pushing his hair from his face while letting out a breathy fit of giggles, not discovering the hidden uncomfortable shift in Eren’s behavior. It wasn't her fault, he couldn't blame the girl for him being so caught up with his ex to the point where even when he was kissing other women, he couldn't help but get his mind off of you.
"If you want, we could go upstairs." Mikasa whispers in his ear, leading a shiver up his spine with a flash of sexual excitement. He is pleased at the end of her offer, locked in with the peck of her lips against his jawline.
The offer is absolutely knee-jerking, and if it were any other situation, Eren probably would have let this really pretty girl he just met jump his bone, but all the confidence that had been built up from the night had instantly drained the second he had caught your gaze from across the room. 
Both staring at each other pointedly, Eren’s lashes fluttered under your unflinched, hard glare as Mikasa continued to litter kisses with the promises of hickeys around his collarbone.
He wanted to feel so smug, wanted to use the new attention as a way to finally get back at you for making him feel the way that he felt watching you dance with Armin, but the revenge just didn't feel right, and his mood soured further at the thought of using some poor innocent girl to get back at you.
The intense eye contact is cut off by Mikasa bringing her face closer to his, seeking out another kiss. Eren squeezes his eyes closed, wanting nothing more but to get the looping image of you and Armin out of his damned head.
"What do you say?" being reminded in a soft whisper of the intimate question still in the air from earlier, the creep of her fingers dawning down his chest and rubbing with intention at the crotch of his jeans, Eren grabbing her wandering hand before it could do any more active damage.
"Maybe...maybe we shouldn’t right now," Eren sheepishly responds, his eyes searching for any ounce of rejection on her features,trying to shake the sight of you from his attention.
Mikasa doesn't seem all that hurt, if anything, she nods her head in understanding, taking no for an answer without another word, pulling her hands away and wrapping them around his shoulders instead, her head turning enough to show that she knows his attention is entirely too spent on someone else.
"What a player," she chuckles knowingly, not quite catching a glance at you, yet her eyes still scan around the room. "Something tells me I should go get another drink before whoever you're looking for comes and bites off my head." And just like that, Eren's perfect distraction slips through his fingers, and he's left alone once more, kicked back with the same emotions he had coming into the party.
His attention is rudely pulled back towards you as you appear in front of him. It was like you were hunting, searching for the perfect moment when he had his guard down to strike.
You placed your hand on your hips as he dared to stare up at you through his lashes, his body too at ease with the disappointed expression twisted on your face. "Are you fucking drunk right now?"
"Well, is this not a party?" Eren replies almost too easily, his tone has deepened enough to get a shifted, sneering reaction from you at the snappy comeback. Watching your movements a bit too intensely as your arms crossed over your chest, Eren didn't bother to look away from how plump your breasts looked in the pretty little crop top you managed to squeeze them into.
"I was going to ask if you wanted a ride home since I saw Connie dip with someone, but excuse me, I see that you're too busy tongue-fucking any random slut willing to give it out tonight, huh?" Your insults dig deep, even with the drooling sight of your tight-skirted figure dancing right in front of him. Eren sucked in a breath at the acknowledgement.
"You broke up with me." He spoke straight to your thighs, his tongue tracing over the bottom of his lip now that he could see just how good you looked tonight. All dressed up with your makeup done, his heart didn't want to imagine what you were hoping to get into if his presence wasn't there to ruin the mood. "Remember?"
"Fine, walk your ass home." Rolling your eyes and storming away, knowing that he was in the right, Eren let out a sigh before sleazily trailing behind your grumbling every step.
Watching the sway of your hips as you walk in front of him all the way to your car, slumping into the passenger side without any word even as you continued to have a one-sided conversation about how much of an asshole he was for not saying bye to his little girlfriend he was kissing on even though Eren was pretty sure Mikasa would be more understanding than what you were giving her credit for. 
The drive home is tense, the soft pitter of rain hitting the windshield wipers as the streetlights leech orange and white colors through your tinted windows. The radio played lowly, not loud enough to recognize the soft melody of something playing but not quite low enough to have you both sitting in complete silence.
"Are you guys talking?" Eren’s voice is still deep, almost cushioning from how gently he posed the question, almost as if he were so loud that he would be afraid to scare you away.
Your fingers clench around the leather of the wheel, eyes glancing away from the road for just a split second to give him a knitted-brow look. "What, who are you talking about?"
Eren feels like he’s back in middle school again, fidgeting with the bottom hem of his shirt, all nervous around you. "You and Armin, you guys looked pretty close at the party." He could almost taste the bitterness on his tongue, his head leaning back on the headrest, looking how desperate he had to look, practically pining over you with his broken-hearted expression.
"I should ask the same for you then." You ignore him, reaching to dial the music just a bit louder, not wanting to sit in silence if it meant opening up a question and answer panel between just him and you. 
The statement hurts, both physically and emotionally. Eren gets reminded of the pit still forming in his stomach.
The frowning emotion threatening a knot in his throat, having to swallow down the absolute word vomit of apologizes and begging he has threatened to spill from his throat in your honor, "Well, I’ve missed you." Was all that he could manage before he had to physically turn himself away from you, using the pressing cold glass to help aid the burning firepit of emotions he had covering the rest of his reasonability in dark, thick sud.
You didn't react, at least not in line of sight, even if you heard him, you hadn’t shown any acknowledgement of his heartbreaking confession. Not even when you pulled into his driveway had you bothered to give him a glance other than the action of you sliding off your seatbelt and letting him sit in the car for a breath before he was trialing after you once more.
Trudging through his apartment, even with you inside the home walls, you still felt a sense of lonesomeness. "Ren…" 
"Do you wanna come to bed?" Your voice sounds through the halls, following back to his bedroom, the door left ajar enough to see you lying in the place right where he had thought you belonged, blankets lifted open, enticing him to lie down next to you with a sobering small smile.
Crawling under the blankets right next to you without another word, cuddling against your chest, wrapping his arms around the front of your torso, and hugging close enough for you to lean with your back resting against the mattress as his face rubbed against the plush of your falling and rising cushioning breast.
"I’ve…missed you too." You lowly admit, using your acrylics to softly comb through the back of his hair, easing back his tension farther with a small kiss pecked on the top of his forehead.
The sound of the blanket shifting as it carries with Eren’s movements, his arms ankling at both sides of your head, holding himself up from pressing you with his entire body weight as he slots himself between your part legs.
Your fingers twining tighter into his scalp as he leans down for a kiss, the muffle of his moan pressing against your seeking lips, letting you slip your tongue inside of his mouth, adding to the rising heated makeout session.
The pace never lets up, growing with more eagerness. Eren frees one of his arms, letting his hands wander down, squeezing your thigh part by the bend of the knee, and having your skirt ride up unwearable to your waist.
Knuckling aside the lace of your panties away from your pussy, he used the pad of his thumb to tease at your clit only adding sinking two digits into the equation. Your cunt welcomed them with a greedy buck at the buck of your hips against his touch, kicking off his jeans awkwardly.
Eren is already sweating from the grouling press of his hard cock miserably untouched against your thigh, grinding shamelessly against your leg while his fingers pistoned with a lewd wet squelch from your coated arousal inside of you.
Pausing only when your fist tugs with a knot full of his hair tangled between your knuckles, your other hands push him away by the press of your palm against his chest.
Switching positions with Eren almost a little too obentaintly with you sitting straddled on his lap in an all too familiar position, you look angelic on top of him with your hair dawning over your face knocking out of his daze with a hiss at the slow teasing feeling of your fingers wrapping around the length of his cock and pressing his tip at the folds of your entrance. 
"I’ve missed you." The soft brush of your coo fans against his face from how close you were, and with your noses brushing, you both react breathlessly to the feeling of you lowering yourself down on his cock. The thrusting clench of his hips living up from the mattress and intruding deeper inside of you left him whimpering under your touch. "I’ve missed you so, so much, Ren."
The pace of your bouncing hips is relentless, starting at your own brutal pace and grounding yourself with heavy palms pressed against his chest.
Eren couldn't do anything but lie back and whine against your mouth, as you used him for your own release from the mental war he had to not end the fun for which he had been craving all week. Whimpering at the amazing feeling he missed so badly at your pussy squeezing against him so snuggly as if your body had just been made for him so perfectly. 
Eren’s hands help guide the grind of your hips as your muscles tense and tremble on top of him suddenly, your body going rigid, hugging your collapsed body against his hold, begging a string of nonsense as your cunt continues to milk him until his very last drop.
His hips don't bother halting, switch positions as he lays on top to help with his lazy, slow strokes, listening to your soft whines as you hug him closer to you, wrapping your trembling legs against his hips and pulling him as deep as you possibly could.
“I missed you too baby.”
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kidstemplatte · 7 months
Text
papas reacting to fnaf
this is so silly but i’m a diehard fnaf fan. also i started thinking about the parallels between the afton and emeritus family and got rlly emotional LMAO. please enjoy teehee
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primo
-you’re sitting at your computer, losing your fucking mind. why is night 4 so hard???
“let me try.” he says.
-you know he won’t get far, bless his heart, but you’ll let him give it a shot.
-little do you know, he’s an absolute BEAST
-he takes a seat at your desk and starts clicking.
so i… stop them?”
“yeah. just don’t let them get into the office.”
“the power’s going down.”
“yeah, when you use the cameras, turn on the lights, or use the doors, it’ll go down. then it’s game over.”
he nods.
-he’s weirdly quiet, clicking away, until you suddenly hear the joyous chimes indicating he’s survived until 6 am.
“is that all?” he goes.
-your mouth is literally agape, you’re in shock.
-it doesn’t scare him at all
-he starts playing the game at his office whenever he needs a break. doesn’t flinch.
-lowkey sheds a tear at henry’s speech.
-he doesn’t like security breach, he prefers the repetitiveness of the old games
-he takes the lore very seriously, like it’s a piece of fine literature LOL
-the story of the afton family is heartbreaking to him and he relates to it a tad </3
-his favorite game is the OG and his favorite character is freddy. he’s a simple man.
secondo
-“this is stupid. what am i supposed to- FUCK! SATANAS! STAI INDIETRO, CREATURA DISGOSTA!”
-he clears his throat.
“i was caught off guard.”
-he doesn’t want to watch the lore videos at first because he thinks it’s “childish” but soon is sucked in.
-watches the lore videos with you and is specifically fascinated with william aftons character.
-he likes kids so he’s immediately disgusted by the cruelty of his actions
-he makes it his life’s mission to unpack the psychology of william afton
-his favorite is fnaf 4, he likes the nightmare designs
-HATES BALLOON BOY. wants to punch him in the face.
-he’s not very good at the games and curses so loudly when he plays because he’s so determined to make it through the night 😭
terzo
-“five nights at freddy’s? why are you spending the night with freddy and not me?”😏
-terzo hates mascots so he’s already scared shitless.
-when he plays the game he talks to himself like a maniac.
“no. stay, bunny. do not move. you too, bear. WHERE DID THE CHICKEN COME FROM? no, let’s NOT eat- eat by yourself, chicken!”
-loses his mind at the jumpscares, screams like a little girl.
-but he’s so interested in the complexity of the lore
-terzo goes down internet rabbit holes late at night LMAO so he’s more than willing to watch lore videos with you
-bro had to do a double take when he saw toy chica💀
-“purple man? he has good taste, no?”
immediately takes it back when he finds out what his deal is
-hums the theme song while he’s at work.
-his favorite game is fnaf 2 (and it has nothing to do with toy chica)
copia
-take a shot every time i say this on my account:
copia is a big fat dork.
(but we all are too, and we love him for it)
-he doesn’t understand it’s scary at first. aww, look at the bear! clicks freddy’s nose on the poster over and over. “boing! boing! boing! boing! boing!”
-but as soon as he checks the cameras he’s like OH. i see what this is.
-he gets so stressed playing the game LMAO
-when you introduce him to the lore he’s so fascinated and deeply invested. it rattles his brain but he can’t get enough.
-the next morning after you watch a video with him he has deep eye bags. you find out he stayed up all night watching lore videos.
-soon he’s a diehard fan. he keeps merch in his office beside his comics and other collectibles.
-his favorite game is pizzeria simulator because he loves the non-scary part 😭
-he loves foxy because he’s “misunderstood”🥺
-and mangle, thinks it’s sad how the kids took her apart and put her back together :,(
-has all the plushies LOL
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morgandoesstuffsig · 11 months
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Idk if ur requests are open, but hear me out XD. A creator!reader who descends on Teyvat meets all the Archons and such. Then up and leaves by changing their appearance in order to explore their creation and how it has changed. Every once in a while Creator will make themselves obvious by performing acts only the Creator could. Once they are found out they just up and leave again only to resurface after another Divine act. TLDR: Creator playing cat and mouse with Teyvat
oh my GOD creator is just TORTURING then atp
small ramble because i still have massive writers block [cries] also ignore how late this is pls ok mwamwa thnx
c.w // yan. chars
song : Best Friend - Rex Orange County
SAGAU INCOMING : YAN CHARS.
okay so you decided 'hey man, what if i wasn't worshipped the moment i stepped outside'
so you just said fuck it and shifted
(it's been a while since you've done so, it kind of felt weird and hurt a tiny bit)
walking around teyvat in an odd, different form. completely different hair, height, clothes, you get the gist
the only things you couldnt change however were three things:
your blood (still gold, but you didn't plan on bleeding infront of anyone)
your aura (still comforting, caring, and even alluring)
your voice (why? zero clue.)
escaping the throne room you've oh so sadly been bound to!! having fun while doing it!!
(the only real reason you managed to escape is bc you managed to get the archons out and actually tend to their nations, as per your request order)
messing around while escaping fr!! people passing by wondering why this random person they've never seen is (not very) sneakily running away from the creator's palace/temple
but eventually shrugging it off, albeit reluctantly
messing around in mondstat, playing with the npc children more than you could usually, giving them the time of their life!!
this is where you use your first creator powers >:3
some poor kid scraped his knee real hard on the bridge, let's say timmie (hes so sweet he just wants to defend his birds pls b nice to him!!)
you, being the belovent god you are, use your divine powers to heal him
whether you do it with the hc of having to use your own gold blood or just having special healing powers only creator has, you do it
however, your dumbass mind hadn't thought of the fact that Venti may have been watching this
new outlander person with a mysterious aura
and now he quickly learns its you :0!!
the archons had no clue you could shapeshift!! why wasnt this in the ancient scrolls??? did they just lose the ones that mentioned it???
venti immediately finds some weird wind way to tell the other archons
fucking loud mouth
speaking of which, ei is freaking. out.
she came back to just check on you in your throne room and youre just.
not there??
panics, almost goes to zhongli before she gets venti's message and calms down slightly
atp you've realize you've outed yourself
so after making sure timmie is find you quickly run off into the forest before venti can come after you and smother you (both physically and with questions)
forest reached, new mission : new form needed
this basically keeps happening, and it's a needed breath of fresh air for you
running to liyue looking like a normal person until you magically form a special medicine that was unheard of from your hand for an elder, sickly lady
running from liyue to sumeru and shifting into!! an animal!! a fox!! cat!! tiger!! dog!! bird!! any of the sort!!
only getting outed from sumeru after you accidentally spoke while in animal form and having to go over to inazuma as an unknown, traveling sailor!!
getting outed after that for your extremely familiar aura and voice (inazuma people are scarily observant towards strangers) and eventually getting shoved escorted back to your palace/temple
funny stories to tell
however, the archons wont be leaving your room for quite a while..
oh well, who says you don't have other stunts to pull?
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destructive-path · 5 months
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Patrol Partner Protection Syndrome - E.W.
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summary: Ellies habit of going above and beyond her duties as a patrol partner causes you to question her motives.
tags: patrol partner!ellie, slight innocent! reader, ellie is older than you in this, swearing, a kiss is shared at the end, no smut in this one folks just good ol fashion yearning :)
a/n: as usual i wrote this very spur of the moment and its not proofread but you love me anyways so j shut up and enjoy
“Yep, that sounds like a classic case of the 3PS.”
“3PS? That sounds like a fucking star wars character.”
A loud laugh leaves Jesses lips at your remark furthering your frustration visibly before Dina smacks him on the shoulder gently.
“Patrol partner protection syndrome.” Dina says plainly.
“What the hell is that?”
“Its why Ellie threatened that guy that was flirting with you at the bison last night.”
The look on your face is still riddled with confusion. Dina sighs deeply, your innocence was always something that was a little difficult for others to adjust to. Explaining certain topics always took a little longer when it came to you.
“Sometimes, when two people get paired up on patrol they begin to…how should I say this? Okay look. Usually in a pair theres one person who feels a strong obligation to protect the other. It doesnt always have to be the stronger person per say. On patrol you and this one person go through some serious shit together. You both become more and more venerable the more you put your trust in them and let them protect you, aaand sometimes the lines blur between them protecting you to keep you alive and them protecting you because they think they are meant to. All the time.”
You slowly begin to understand.
“Its what happened with me and Jesse…Tommy and Maria too.”
“Wait but you’re all couples.”
Jesse and Dina look at each other then look at you. A grin fights its way on both their faces, then your eyes grow wide.
“Oh my god….OH? MY GOD? Are you saying Ellie likes me?”
They both burst out into laughter, once again making you feel extremely embarrassed. You cross your arms in frustration and slump further in your chair.
“Hey. Hey hey. Im not saying she HAS a crush on you, because thats not my place to assume how she feels completely.”
“Buut she did mention her heart beats faster anytime you smile at her, and thats like pretty gay.”
“JESSE.”
Jesse throws his hands up in defense, then shoots you a sympathetic look.
“Sorry! Look am I wrong? You two would be great together. Plus i’m sick of hearing about you every time Ellie comes over.”
“JESSE!”
“What? WHAT?”
“Your killing them.”
You felt exhausted. Ellie had feelings for you? She consoled in her best friends about your smile? This changes everything. How were you supposed to see her casually or for patrol, knowing what you knew now.
“Jesus im losing it.”
“Well, do you feel anything for Ellie?”
You thought about it for a moment.
“I-I dont know. I mean I like having her around. She always makes me feel comfortable…safe. I really like when she cooks for me or plays me songs on her guitar. She always looks so cool when she plays, and her voice is sooo pretty. I mean shes also really pretty too. Well not pretty…more like-“
As you search for the right word to describe Ellie you notice the way the couple looks at you. Like you just said something incredibly obvious and extremely oblivious to you. Then it sinks in.
“Oh my god I like Ellie.”
They both nod in unison.
“I gotta go.” You shoot up and grab your bag then rush out Dina and Jesses place, not bothering to say your goodbyes. You only had one thing in mind.
Ellie.
As you run as fast as your legs can muster, you think about the events of last night that led you to Dinas and Jesses inquiring them for advice.
It was all very trivial and cliche. You had been dancing at the Tipsy Bison after a few shots of whiskey, on your own. The usual gang was there minding their own except for Ellie. She always had her eyes on you whenever your presence was near. Glass in hand as she leaned on the bar watching while you spun around the room. Ellie couldn’t bring herself to join you, so she settled for being an audience member. She always admired your outgoing nature, never concerned on what others think of you. As Ellie thought about other attributes you had that made her fall for you, someone else had decided to take it upon them to impede on your dance party of one.
Some man tall in height but skinny in stature stood uncomfortably close to you. Uncomfortable for Ellie that is. The grip had tightened on her glass so that if she clenched any harder it would break. The sight of the mans arm slithering around your waist and pulling you close had Ellie swallowing the rest of the contents of her drink and slamming the glass on the bar counter and making her way over to you both.
“Ellie-“ Dina tried to stop her due to the angry nature of the glass hitting the wood making a sound loud enough to pull the couple away from whatever they were having, but its no good.
“Save it.” Ellie snaps, then makes her way over to you. As she advances closer she can tell you weren’t one hundred percent comfortable with this random mans advances on you. She knew you were too nice, too innocent to understand that his intentions were not pure and that you didnt have the strength to push him away. But Ellie sure did.
“Thats enough of that.” Ellie says as she rips the mans arms off of you and grabs your wrists to pull you away from him.
“Woah woah who the fuck are you?”
“Im Ellie, and we are leaving.”
“I think they can make that decision for themselves huh?”
Ellie looks at you with a deep frustration. One you had never seen in those eyes before. Not even on patrol, this was something by different. If you weren’t so tipsy you could swear it was laced with a heavy amount of possession.
“Ellie.” you slur slightly.
“We are leaving. Now.” Before the man can protest you were being pulled out the door and into the cold jackson night.
The walk back to your place was silent. Ellies grip on your wrist had morphed into a waffling hand hold sometime after you exited the Tipsy Bison. The warmth of her fingers intertwined with yours made you heat up inside, blushing extremely prominently due to the alcohol running through your system.
When you had finally reached your door Ellie pulls you face to face with her. Hand still together. She uses her free hand to push some loose strands of off your face to see you better. A soft smile twitches on her lips for a moment then she finally speaks.
“Go inside and go to bed, you’re drunk.” Its not the farewell you hoped for, but it’s soft. Ellie utters the words with care in her own way. You can’t help but stare at her through lidded puppy eyes and nod slowly.
You turn to unlock the door then turn back around.
“Goodnight Ellie.” You whisper in a way that makes her heart ache.
“Goodnight.”
It’s only when she turns around to walk away does she finally let go of your hand.
“Ellie? Ellie please open up I know you’re in there.”
After knocking for what felt like forever you were finally graced with the sounds of locks being undone. You take a step back and watch the door swing open revealing a slightly disheveled looking Ellie. Still she renders you speechless for a moment her appearance making you shy, as it always has.
“What’s up?” She says genuinely concerned. You see her face soften when she realized the interruption of her personal time was you. The difference making you blush.
“I-Can I come in?”
Her eyes grow wide, you hadn’t been inside of her space yet. The vision of you and her in her room alone flashes through her brain. She steps aside and opens the door fully to make room for you to enter.
“Oh yeah of course please come in. Sorry.” She laughs shyly. You make your way into her space and can no longer hold your questions to yourself.
“Sorry its kind of a mess I wasnt really expecting any-“
“Ellie do you like me?” Its silent for a moment before Ellie speaks up.
“Of course I like you kid, you’re my patrol partner.”
“No not in that way I mean, you’re always looking out for me and making me things. Even when we aren’t on patrol! You act like my bodyguard sometimes…”
Ellie knows exactly where to is going. Your confrontation of her actions makes her smile a bit.
“I feel the need to protect you outside of patrol sometimes, sure.” Shes looking right in your eyes, observing the look on your face so she doesn’t say the wrong thing. Right now you look as if you had just been hypnotized eyes devoid of much thought.
“3PS.” You whisper, just loud enough for Ellie to hear. It’s quiet for a moment then an involuntary scoff comes from Ellie as she raises her arm to pinch the bridge of her nose.
“You’ve been talking to fucking Jesse.” She laughs and turns away from you. You watch her in awe of what you felt like Jesse and Dina had prophesied. Was it really that simple? The act of protecting someone equating to love was a thought that made your heart swell.
“Ellie…I like you. Alot. But I need to know if you like like me or if you just like me enough to protect me. Like you would protect Jesse or Dina. Because I thought I just liked you but then I started thinking about your voice-“
“My voice?” Ellie had turned back around and was still while watching this confession spill out of you. Her question driving a step closer to you, the advancement unbeknownst to you due to the rambling of your thoughts.
“Yes your voice, and the way you sing and play guitar for me and how much i like it-”
Another step.
“-and how pretty you sound when you sing-“
Step.
“-and how pretty you look, well- not pretty but-“
With this last step you had only now realized how close she had gotten. Speech dying at the lack of a word to describe Ellies appearance. You were certain there wasn’t a word so great.
“You don’t think i’m pretty?” Shes pouts, lost on your words. The praise of her leaving your lips so easily is something she would soon crave often. Your breath begins to pick up slightly at her question. The look on her face causes you to whimper slightly. A look of hurt adorns her face, exaggerated to make you feel bad for her.
“No.” You protest meekly.
“No?” Ellie shakes her head in offense.
“No! I-I mean…I think you’re very pretty Ellie.” You shakily admit. The words make you feel a wave of embarrassment in this situation. Her proximity not making this confession any easier.
“Yeah?” She questions rising her hands to push your hair out of your face as she did the night before. The feeling of her fingertip makes you lean into her touch, closing your eyes at the soft stroke of her digit on your forehead.
“Mhhm” You nod and sigh simultaneously. As your head falls due to your loss of strength at her touch, she takes your head into her hand and strokes your cheek with her thumb. This delicate action causes your eyes to open slowly meeting Ellies green ones. Everything about her exudes admiration. She cant get enough of how at her disposal you seemed to be in this moment. The sight of you had coaxed out the need to protest admitting her feelings. No longer afraid that you might deny her.
“I..like like you too.” She whispers while staring at your lips, licking her own at the sight of them. The new shine of her lips brings a heat to your cheeks, Ellie notices this and inhales deep. Her confession has you reeling. The sound of her voice as she admits her likeness towards you radiates need. For once you are certain it’s because of you. Ellie needed you. Ellie wanted you.
“Stay with me today. Hmm? Let me show you.” The softness of her request is as comforting as a pillow. You can tell she so desperately wants to rid you of any doubts that Ellie was completely and utterly infatuated with you.
“Show me what?” You ask curious of what she had in store. She licks her lips again. Then brings your face so close that you can feel Ellies breath on your lips as she whispers-
“How much I like you.”
before placing a desperate kiss on your lips.
~
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unifox · 5 months
Text
Sunset lover
~Pairing: gn!Reader x Mingyu
~Genre: fluff / angst / NonIdolAU
~Warnings: Mentions of food, beach, jealousy, feelings and confusion, overthinking (don't even know what should and shouldn't be a warning at this point)
~Words: 2,5 k 
~Summary: When your cousin decides to ruin family bonding time by bringing two friends to your shared beach house, you unexpectedly find a lover in his childhood friend
a/n: SORRY FOR TAKING SO LONG. It's finally here!!! Wonwoo just became a background character who almost doesn't appear but yeah.
Also, regarding the boy's ages: Cheol, Mingyu and Wonwoo are the same age (one year younger than reader) and cousins May and Rina are like 4 and 7 years younger than reader, respectively.
Inpired by the songs Sunset Lover - Petit Biscuit, Fuck It- BoTalks and Bends - Carly Rae Jepsen
Taglist + anon list open! ~Foxy🦊
Read the intro! | Navigation | Masterlist
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When the four of you reached the food trucks, the place was full. You all walked around trying to see what kind of food there was but ended up settling for hamburgers. Rina said she wanted a regular cheeseburger and stepped out of the line to look for an empty table.
You and your cousin May fell into a comfortable conversation, talking about whatever while Mingyu stood behind you two, just listening.
Every once in a while May would sneak glances at Mingyu who attentively listened to you talk. After ordering, May decided to stay with her sister and keep her company, leaving the two of you to wait at the pickup area.
"So... Mingyu, how's life abroad? Making many new friends? Are you living alone?" You bombarded the boy with questions. It's been around three years since you last saw each other and it was a pleasant surprise to see the skinny tall boy coming home all grown up, strong, mature... and really handsome
"It's been pretty good! I live with a roommate, his name is Jeonghan. He taught me a lot haha... My classes are also fine but I'm still trying to get used to using another language whenever I leave the house" He says proudly
"Got a girlfriend?" You thread carefully
But the man smirks
"No, I only got eyes for you"
You roll your eyes smiling. He's flirty now too
"As if" you both giggle together when you get called by the staff of the food truck
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After eating Mingyu excuses himself and heads to the toilet. When he's out of earshot, both your cousins turn to you and smirk.
"He's totally crushing you"
"YES. He's totally like a puppy looking at its owner... Maybe you should own him..."
You choke on your drink, almost spitting it
"Girlie are you ok? Are you guys even hearing yourselves? Mingyu's just being nice" You try to recompose yourself
"Ugh blind. He's literally giving you heart eyes, and won't stop looking at you"
"Maybe he looks up to me? Cause I'm older" You try to reason "He's just flirty. Maybe he's like this to all girls"
"He wasn't flirty with us" Rina speaks while gathering the trash
"Maybe because you're six years younger than him?" You speak with a duh tone
"Wow y/n, you're really blind. He's into you, that's why he's flirting... Oh he's back"
If Mingyu notices the sudden silence between the three of you, he doesn't mention it. You all stand up and look for a place to get dessert but the only thing on your mind is what Rina said
He's into you
What about you? Are you also into him? I mean, he's cute but you never saw him as more than your little cousin's (even if only one year difference) friend. It felt kinda wrong to crush a younger guy when you were a teenager but now... In your twenties... Does it really matter?
Mingyu notices that you're lost in thoughts and every once in a while he links your pinkies in order to bring you back and get you to not lose yourself in the crowd of people
Add caring to the list of green flags in Mingyu.
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After that night, things seem to have changed a bit
Mingyu seems to be getting closer to you and also seems to be spending more time with you than with his friend, who actually invited him to the house.
You're cooking. Mingyu is there to help
You're cleaning up the kitchen. Mingyu offers to do the dishes
You're going to the beach earlier. Mingyu is ready to make you company
Mingyu was everywhere you were. Maybe your cousins were right, maybe he's... a tiny bit into you? Let's find out
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One afternoon, everyone decided to stay back in the house and just lounge by the pool, but not you. You decided to take a walk on the beach. And of course, so did Mingyu.
You were a bit skeptical regarding his (and your) feelings so you came up with an idea. See if he gets jealous.
"So, Mingyu... Tell me more about that roommate of yours... Jeonghan was his name?"
"Yeah, Jeonghan" Mingyu liked talking about his friend but you seemed too interested in him and it was making him feel weird
"What's he like? Is he older?"
"Yes, he's really nice and caring but he's a menace sometimes. He's a year older than you"
"He's also from Korea?"
"Yeah..."
"Oh is he single?" You asked but this time looking deep into his eyes
Oh, how he could get lost in them. It took a lot of strength to not kiss you right now
"Hm why"
"Oh you know... weighing my options... When Cheol goes to visit you I could tag along and... meet some guys" you said looking at the beautiful sunset. Oh, he was jealous.
"Why not me?" Mingyu didn't miss a beat
"What?"
"Why not me? Go out with me. We're not kids anymore. I'm not a kid anymore" he emphasized stopping in his tracks to fully look at you
You stopped not expecting him to be so forward with his answer and feelings. Turning around he looked... ethereal
His light clothes swayed with the sea breeze and the pinks and oranges of the sunset complimented his tanned skin so well. You know Mingyu was good looking but you didn't realize he was THAT good looking
"I... You're..." You were caught off guard and didn't know how to respond.
Mingyu sighed loudly at your statement, or rather your lack of a response.
"Well, if you didn't like me that way you should just tell me. Please don't lie to make me feel better" he looked uncertain about what he said himself but turned around and walked back to the house.
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Why did you say that?
When you returned to the house, the boys had gone to the market to buy more snacks and drinks
You couldn't even say sorry because he wasn't there
After getting in, you went straight to the room you shared with your cousins. They both stood in the living room and exchanged concerned looks since you didn't even spare them a glance.
Why did you say that? You didn't like him? That wasn't true and you knew it. What was it then? Afraid of being lonely? Were you being too sensitive?
Those thoughts made the tears start to flow
"y/n? Are you- oh my god" May immediately got inside after seeing you crying sitting on your bed "What happened?"
"Did something happen with Mingyu? When he came back he seemed upset as well..." Rina added and that made you cry harder
May hugged you and let you cry until you were too tired to do anymore. When you finally calmed down you told them everything, from the night you went to the food trucks to the moment he left you on the beach
Lonely am I being sensitive? You are the sensitive one Where are you tonight? Where's your home tonight?
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Mingyu didn't mean it, but he couldn't help but put his walls up
He didn't want to be hurt anymore
When you guys were younger he saw that you looked at him the same way you looked at Seungcheol. Like a little brother, which he didn't really like. He desperately wished time would change the way you saw him and he left it up to fate
He went to uni abroad while you took yours in your home country and now it's his vacation and he's back home. Of course, he knew you met other people and he did as well, but sometimes he wished it was you there, in his arms
And now he knows that you don't want him, and it breaks him.
Of course, it crossed his mind that maybe you both could be together temporarily like some sort of summer love but he didn't think he could handle the aftermath when he left again.
He was upset but what could he do? He couldn't just stay away from you when you were living under the same roof for 2 weeks but he could distance himself a bit. Seeing you would definitely make his heart hurt more.
Mingyu didn't realize that he was being awfully quiet during the market trip, which was very unlike his upbeat puppy personality
"What happened to you?" Even quiet Wonwoo went to check on him
"Nothing"
"yeah sure" Wonwoo shrugged but Cheol turned around to put his hand on Mingyu's chest to stop him
"Are you messing around with my cousin?" Seungcheol asked skeptical
"What? No I-" Mingyu tried to defend himself
"Then what? Explain yourself. We got time" Cheol motioned for them to sit on the small bench at the market's exit. Popping open a can of beer and motioning for both friends to sit as well
"Well..."
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"Well, I'm screwed. I guess I do find him endearing but at the moment I couldn't say anything. I do like him a lot but I never considered... dating him. I'm not opposed to the idea tho"
"Just go on a date with him. What could go wrong? Just go for it" May said
"What if things don't work out and we get awkward? I don't want to ruin things for Cheol-" You started to panic again
"Can you stop overthinking for one second? Just do it, the rest is the rest" Rina exclaimed "Gosh, I will charge next time for the therapy session" She smirked when you started giggling. At least you weren't crying anymore
"I guess you're right. Thanks. What would I do without you two" You said hugging them both. "Now let's go, you'll both help me with dinner"
"Oh no..."
You dragged both girls to the kitchen and gave them instructions to prep the tomatoes and arugula to make with pasta. You went to freshen up quickly, getting rid of your crying face and went back to help them and cook the pasta.
When dinner was almost done the boys arrived with more bags than anticipated.
"Sorry we took too long. We got some extra stuff because Mingyu said he was gonna prepare a special meal for us tomorrow" Cheol announced as he set the bags near the counter. The other two did the same and Mingyu started to put the ingredients away.
The girls moved to set up the table, asking Wonwoo to help by taking the heavy stack of plates to the dining area. Cheol gave you a soft smile and moved out of the kitchen as well.
"I'm-"
"I'm sorry I acted that way" Mingyu cut you off "Actually I wanted to talk to you about it" Oh no, he thought "You caught me off guard, I won't lie, but I wanted to give it a try. You and I"
Mingyu stopped what he was doing. Maybe he was imagining things
"We could go on a date tomorrow if you'd like it... I mean, if you're still willing to"
"Yes- I mean. Yeah, I would like that" He said without hesitation
"Oh, great" you have him a shy smile " Can you help me take this pan to the table?"
"Yeah, let's go" he moved to help you smiling brightly. Maybe things were starting to work out
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The next day arrived and passed as normal. In the afternoon you all decided to go grab some ice cream and you and Mingyu decided to separate from the rest to go on your date.
"You didn't have to pay you know? I'm the one who has a job and not a part-time" you smirked as he passed you the waffle cone
"I'd be rude if I didn't pay on our first date" he retorted
"Well thank you, what a gentleman" you giggled as he sat opposite you. The ice cream parlor was daily empty, but it was good because it gave you some privacy.
"Mingyu" you started "I wanted to be honest with you. I think you're cute and overall a great person, but I would be lying if I said I ever thought about dating you. I don't see you as a kid anymore, you've grown into someone so admirable... you grew up so well. Your confession wasn't something I was expecting but I guess the idea of us became... surprisingly pleasant" you said looking at him
"Y/n, thank you. For being honest with me. I- I have liked you since we were teens and when you didn't respond I put my walls up. I didn't mean to be rude to you, I guess I was just scared that you would reject me. I shouldn't have acted that way I'm sorry... but I'm happy. I'm happy that you're willing to give us a chance" he smiled. A smile you could definitely get used to.
"Well lover boy, how about that special recipe Cheol said you were going to prepare?" You said and he smirked
"Get really to taste the best dish you've ever had. I'll sweep you off your feet and you'll definitely fall for me this time" he said proudly, taking a bite of his cone and having some ice cream on the corner of his mouth
"I'll be looking forward to it" you said while grabbing a napping and cleaning the corner of his mouth.
He could get used to that
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Your days at the beach were ending and your dates with Mingyu were making your relationship become stronger.
"Mingyu what are your plans when we get back to the city?" Tina asked as you all were lying on beach towels under the sunshade.
"I'll go visit my family for a while, my grandma lives on the countryside" he answered and took a peek at the magazine you were reading. Your head rested on his stretched arm and he moved you to basically lay on his chest since his arm was starting to feel numb.
"Before you go back to uni, could you spare me some time?" You asked looking up at him. Even under the sunglasses, he could see your doe eyes
"Anything for you" he smiled
"Ew, don't say those things in front of us" Seungcheol made a face of disgust and gave Mingyu a slight slap. "Anyways, anybody wants to go take a dive? I'm melting"
"Yeah let's go" Wonwoo said standing up, as well as Rina. May also stood up but reached for her purse.
"Should I get us snacks? That tent is selling French fries"
"Oh yes, please get us two portions! The boys eat too much" you responded sitting up as your dousing just nodded and went on her way.
"Before I move back I'll take you on a really nice date. Maybe at your house? I could cook again since you liked it so much" Mingyu smirked as he resumed your previous conversation
"What are you implying Mr. Kim?" You side-eyed him but smiled after "That would be nice, I'm sad you'll have to leave me soon" you pouted
"Don't worry, I'll come back running for my girlfriend. You could also visit me you know..."
"Oh? Am I your girlfriend now? Since when?" You raised your eyebrows at him. It was amusing to poke fun at him, his cute pouting was a sight you loved
"You don't want to be my girlfriend?"
You pecked those pouty lips. You were both being really cliche, but with him, things were beginning to feel right.
You pecked those pouty lips. You were both being really cliche but with him, things were beginning to feel right.
"Yes, I would love that"
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I'm sorry about this open ending! I got stuck on this one and had to extend it because I wasn't liking it at all. I hope you guys like it! Likes and reblogs are appreciated! Stay tuned for the Wonwoo version!!!
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