#everyone is trying to kill a flying eyeball and he's questioning if he just got scammed for the 4th time that week

[ficswithtacotuesday]

Day 5: Map

Merasmus is a prime target for scammers. One Halloween he dragged the mercs to this 'haunted house' in some suburban so he can gain enough souls/blood/whatever to open a portal to hell or some crap, only to find out that the HOA in the area tricked him into buying it so they wouldn't have to deal with squatters.

Like all you have to do is say the words 'ancient', 'haunted', and 'magic', and he'll already be phoning the closest crime group for money. This wizard will never learn.

I want a scream fortress map in the game where everything is just completely normal and Merasmus is in the back talking about how something will happen at anything moment, while also phoning the person who sold him the land

[missygoesmeow]

missy's tips for honour mode :) (it's very long I'm sorry) (oh and here be many spoilers) (but pictures too!)

please note I am not a pro gamer or anything. I sucked so bad when I first started this game (I had no idea wtf I was doing). Like seriously. I didn't know what an action was. what a bonus action was. "No movement left". WHAT DO YOU MEAN NO MOVEMENT LEFT. I had played DnD once before.

I literally bought this game because of Astarion.

I usually play one game and that is Overwatch. the only other time I stopped playing OW was to play Resident Evil: Village because of Lady D. vampire marketing works on me. specifically evil vampire. damn u Neil and Maggie.

if you have any questions about a specific boss or something feel free to ask! I didn't fight everyone though - like I did not do House of Grief because I didn't need to and also it's hard :)

I think a lot of it just came on down to...

ANYWAY. letsa go! this is very rambling!

Like I said in my reply to anon, the best tip is to do tactician FIRST. You’ll get destroyed otherwise. I didn’t finish my tactician run but I did get to act 3 and I did most boss fights (Gortash, Raphael, Cazador). Bosses have legendary actions in tactician and it’s fucking annoying. All the homies hate radiant retort….

Another tip is fucking collect everything. It’s hard to get gold and certain potion ingredients later on. Potion of Speed (you need hyena ears for this) is the BEST. I used them for my Ketheric fight (second phase) and killed him in three turns. I also used them for the final fight and used one or two with Raphael and Orin.

Smokepowder Barrels. I think people call this Barrelmancy? I didn't use them much. I hoarded them for one reason and one reason only.

To blow Raphael.

His soul pillar towers that is. To blow up his pillars. His big long pillars.

Okay I'm done.

(also I did use three in my last fight against the brain - popped them next to it and blew 'em up) Elixir of Bloodlust - sooooo handy with Astarion!

Invisibility Potion is a must - I used this to escape fights when three people were deaded (this happened a few times😅) and get my good friend Withers to bring them back.

bonus tip: don't go into a fight with half your spell slots because you think "she'll be right". she won't be...as seen above

HOLY FUCK WITHERS. You can pickpocket Withers. I used Astarion to get our money back anytime I resurrected, changed class or got a hireling - he doesn’t care if you fail either, just keep trying.

DON'T BE DUMB LIKE MISSY Don't be like me, don't half pay attention in cut scenes and accidentally press the wrong dialogue option. Or else your good friend Lae'zel will turn on you and you will have A Bad Time.

Gale has a stressful day💗

The githyanki are scary and actually now that I think about it, those were usually the fights I had to run away from like a leetle biatch.

Halsin has a stressful day 💗

I forgot that Psionic Backlash is like a thing that does damage and that if your entire worm filled party does it and the person you are casting is at like...say 19 health...they will die because that is not Passive Damage.

And then Jaheira will leave because you murdered her friend.

Oopsie.

(I lost Shart, Lae'Zel and Jaheira in this run) GENERAL STUFF

Always surprise the enemy if you can, it’s a massive advantage!

Get the eye from Volo. This run was not about looking pretty, it was about getting any advantage I could get. Let that man poke out your eyeball. And make sure it’s your Tav, you will mostly likely swap companions and it’s just better if it’s you. It's helpful in a lot of fights but especially Auntie Ethel

Become half illithid. I did this with my Tav, Gale and Minthara. Astarion was a little bitch about it so I didn’t give it to him but I wish I had made him do it.

She looks Not Great but she can fly (sorry Astarion but Z'hera only likes pussy)

Being able to fly is just SO helpful and cull the weak is OP! Also mmmmm worms :)

MY BUILD/PARTY

A Giant Woman (my tiefling) as a Paladin - Oath of Vengeance.

I broke my oath when I ascended Astarion but you can just get it back. Oathbreaker is still good (that’s what I was in my tactician run) but I wanted my channel divinity charges. I started with the Everburn Blade from the cambion Commander Zhalk on the Nautaloid (when you get Shart, give her the Command Spell and use “Drop” so you can just yoink it off him and save a fight). My final weapon was the Nyrulna which you can get in Act 3 at the Circus. To get this you must pickpocket the genie to take his ring and then play his game. He will accuse you of cheating and send you somewher. The prize at the end is this weapon. I love it. I just went invisible and walked through, I didn’t fight the creatures there.

Astarion - the classic gloomstalker/assasin. I had one level assasin and then did 6 levels ranger before going back to assassin. So he was 6 levels in each. With him ascended, he does INSANE damage. I never swap out that vamp, he’s too useful.

Shart/Minthara - I lost Shart in the Shadowfell - wouldn't let her murder Dame Aylin.

a simpler time. before I killed my beloved and my brain was full of worms.

I had to fight her (it was very sad). I changed her class to Life of Domain Cleric. I then made Minthara my cleric when Shart died (same build). She replaced my lover and my cleric <3

i love my new evil girlfriend

Gale - Evocation Wizard so I didn’t change him at all!

he's so hopeful. and Z'hera is very gay.

TIPS FOR POTIONS

If it’s throwable (like invisibility) group the gang together to throw one on the ground to get you all - saves using multiple.

Potion of Speed has an effect called lethargic that is active for one round after the potion ends. This means you miss a turn. HOWEVER! If you drink another one on the last active round of the potion, your Tav will become lethargic immediately and next round you’ll be fine :) I did this for the Ketheric fight.

It’s also helpful (because of lethargic) to not have all characters take the potion in the same round (if you give it to everyone). I never did, I usually gave them to Gale and my Tav.

I hoarded so many scrolls. I had so many dimension door scrolls at the end.

I did get the Necromancy of Thay and did all the things. And then I never used it :)

BIGGEST TIP ONCE YOU'VE UNLOCKING LEVEL 6 SPELL SLOT WITH CLERIC (ALSO AVAILABLE WITH DRUID)

I saw this on reddit! Pretty much what I did was get a hireling - Cleric - and have that Cleric cast Heroes' Feast on my party.

The affected entity is immune to Diseases, Poisons, and being Frightened, it makes all Wisdom Saving throws with Advantage, and its maximum Hit Points are increased by 12

Lasts until long rest!! I also then cast Freedom of Movement on everyone in the party. I then cast Warding Bond on someone - usually Gale because he's a squishy boy :) If I knew it was a BIG FIGHT! I got another Cleric to cast Warding Bond on another party member.

you can see Heroes' Feast (the condition is called Thoroughly Stuffed) and Freedom of Movement. These all last until long rest!

Pretty much any other companions were respeced as Cleric (though I made Jaheira a Wizard same as Gale so I could use her). I did this so that I could use Divine Intervention multiple times within the game!

I used Opulent Revival and nothing else

KEEP IN MIND.

anything can kill you in honour mode. even an elevator.

it crushed me. somehow.

thanks Larian

(if you want proper guides definitely go to Reddit!)

[iamaslutforcoffee]

Scary

Chapter One: Romero Brothers Scrap and Salvage

In most circumstances, the older sister tells the younger one to be careful, stay clear of these types of men, don't do this or that.

But here we are, the roles reversed. Instead I'm trying to warn her the same things she tried to warn me of.

Summer is a beautiful girl, always has been..and incredibly smart as well but most of the time she just acts so damn dumb. Like right now.

"Well, you didn't have to drive, Winter. You should have just taken a plan and let me pick you up from the air port."

Sighing, I applied pressure to the gas and speed past multiple cars every direction around me.

"And not able to make a get away if I need to? I'll pass. Thank you. Listen ill be at this scrap yard in about 15 minutes, I'll see you then" I quickly said and hung up.

I finally pulled into "Romero Brothers scrap and salvage", giggling at the fact this is were Summer willingly spent her time. Why? I don't know, nor do I care. I parked away from the mass amount of bikes and got out, fishing for a cigarette in my bag.

"You know, cigarettes can kill you"

I looked up and saw a youngish looking guy sitting on one of the bikes, staring at me. I simply gave him a thumbs up and lit my cig, inhaling the nicotine and exhaling.

"Winter! I thought you quit?" Summer yelled from the porch of the house.

"Yeah, when pigs fly sis." I replied. I leaned against the car as Summer came towards me, more men coming out from the house.

"Why the hell is there a house in the middle of a scrap yard?" I asked her while motioning towards it.

"It's their clubhouse" she shrugged, linking her arm with me.

"Ah. Ok. So why am I here for a party again? I could've stayed in charming for a party." I exhaled the smoke again whilst eyeballing a couple of the guys on the porch. Their kuttes all had various patches, but the main one said Mayans MC. Wait... I know them! Well, of them. Jax worked hard to repair the relationship with the rival MC.

"Well.. uhm... oh! EZ, baby.. come here. Let me introduce you to everyone Winter" Summer avoided the question and I stared her down. The guy that was sitting on the bikes came walking over and smiled, wrapping an arm protectively around Summer.

"Ezekiel, but everyone calls me EZ. It's nice to meet You, Winter." Ez replied. He was tall, nicely groomed. Beautiful eyes.. I can see why visually Summer chose him.

I simply knodded, and looked back at the rest of them.

"That's Gilly, Hank, Creeper..Taza, Riz. Bishop is the short one.." she named off almost everyone, calling Bishop short earned her a cussing but she simply giggled.

"That's Chucky.. Oh, Angel must be somewhere inside.. that just leaves.." she landed on the last one and I about hauled ass.

"FUCKING COCO?!" I screamed, jumping into my friends arms.

"..coco." Summer sighed, laughing at the fact i hauled serious ass after him.

"Damn, bebita! You really going to fucking jump my bones this quick?" Coco smiled, wrapping his arms around me tightly.

"Oh, te saltaré el culo cualquier día de la semana Coco" (Oh, I'll jump your ass any day of the week Coco) I replied, hugging him tightly.

"Can anyone tell me who the fuck that is hugging Coco? Does he have another fucking kid cause I swear to god his ass always fuckin'.." I heard loudly coming from behind everyone else.

Out came a man wearing the same kutte as everyone else, his rockers reading "secretary" instead. He looked to be the tallest of the bunch, his dark raven hair slicked back and a nice little beard matching. He looked like a much older version of EZ...oh, that must be..

"Angel! I swear to god if you ever insinuate my baby sister fucking anyone in this group, no offense Bishop, l swear to god.." Summer replied, cursing Angel out.

"Hey, uh.. EZ? You related to him?" I asked, hopping down from Coco and looking in EZ's way.

"Yeah.. yeah thats my brother Angel." He replied, shaking his head.

"Give me your gun." I replied blankly.

"Excuse me?" He replied, very obviously taken aback.

"I said, give me your fucking gun, prospect." I replied, not taking my eyes off of Angel and my sister arguing.

Everyone looked at me curiously, wondering what the hell i was about to do. I grabbed the gun out of Ez's hand and smiled... it has been so long since I've pulled a trigger..

I took the safety off his piece and without warning a shot rang out.

"What the fuck?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!" Angel screamed, grabbing his ear.

"Oh, don't be a fucking baby. It barely grazed your ear" I replied and passed Ez's piece back to him.

"What the fuck is wrong with your sister Summer?!" He hissed, looking between me and Summer.

"You could have fucking killed me had you not missed" he said, and I smiled.

"I didn't miss. That was a warning shot. Fun fact, but did you know when you get shot in the head you can feel the wind blowing through the hole just before you die?" I asked, giggling at the end. Everyone looked at me in bewilderment and I shrugged. Suits themselves.

Being the complete extensively crazy person i am, I walked next to Angel and kissed his cheek.

"La próxima vez no seas un idiota conmigo, ángel." I whispered in his ear, patting his shoulder.

This was going to be interesting.

[autismsupermusicalassassin]

The meeting (poe’s pov)

Poe Dameron x Fem!OC

Note: it would be a part  of my second series which its a concept how Elena Cass/ Jaina Solo met poe but this is through Poe’s eyes 

 “Dank farrik BB-8 we’re losing them!” I told my droid while destroying the oncoming TIES in this section of the galaxy , my squadron and Ivory Squadron are trying to hold off,”Ivory Squadron , where’s Ivory leader?, I can’t see Charlie’s X-wing anywhere”  Zax , Ivory three answer my question “He got shot down back on Naboo Black Leader , he was allowing us to escape and  well I guess they fallow us “ Kriff this is bad , Charlie Cass was suppose to be Ivory squadron’s commander and he’s either stranded or worst killed. My thoughts were interrupted when BB-8 made series of frantic Beeps telling me that a TIE  is at my tail “Kark, hold on “ I shouted through the comms trying to shoot that eyeball of a ship but it seems to know my next move “Happy beeps , we got out of worst situation before “ I told him , bb 8 deeps are suddenly caught me off guard as the TIE suddenly exploded and see that a certain x-wing zoom fast past me ‘Holy shit that charlie X-Wing ‘ I thought but something tells me that isn’t Charlie because, Charlie doesn’t fly that swifty, Snap asked the  “Hey , Charlie welcome back Commander Cass of Ivory Squadron what took you so long ? I see the suppliers with you” I heard a the responds and I froze at the voice which is of a young woman “Wait? My baby brother is a commander of the kriffing Resistance?!?” she said in surprise which made me chuckle a bit, but what made me surprise was the just did the most complicated memover making two TIE crash into each other “I did it, oh my star  I DID IT!” they had said hearing her cheers “Alright everyone jump into lightspeed we’re heading back to base” I told everyone as we all headed back to D’qar .

 Once we landed on the base , I want to see General Organa , and tell her what just happen about Ivory squadrons sudden new leader  because her sounded familiar though “hey Poe” Theo came up to me and patted my back “Thats was some best piloting out there man” I laugh and replied “Well I am the Best pilot in the galaxy ys know” he just roll his eyes “Are you sure about that? from what I saw it’s seems whoever was piloting Charlie X-Wing gave quite a show of their flying skills , so I think your “Best pilot of the galaxy” title goes to this new flyer.” just like he left leaving me confuse, I shook my head and look down to see BB8 but he wasn’t there. Walked by a heard a crash and saw all the creates have fallen when hear beeps from bb8 ‘shit’ I groan apparently he gotten trap in one of the crate as I was about to but-  i saw a girl I seemly recognizes, , she saw the crate that had been knocked over, moving. She kneeled next to it and pushed it back on its feet-Only to hear loud beeps again and see bb8 zoom forward. She was knocked off balance and fell on her butt."Wow, easy there, little buddy!" She laughed , I smile ."It's okay, sweetheart, I've got you."I watch as BB-8 stopped and tilted its head back to stare at her, l."Come here, honey; I'll take a look at you. You were trapped under that crate, huh? How did that even happen?"As she came to her knees, inspecting the little ball of joy with keen attention, the droid beeped enthusiastically."Slow down, sweetheart, your antennas bent , here let me fix that."The poor orange ball had its antenna bent and the woman gently straightened it up. She then wiped off a smudge of grease from his  little head and he beeped thankfully, before going back to narrating how it had ended up trapped in the first place. It bumped into the crate and it fell on his head, effectively trapping him. made a sad face."Oh, honey. I'm sorry. Here, you're all fixed up. What's your name?"He beeped his name and then I heard her name “my names Elena Cass.” that hit me, that girl was Charlie’s sister that he always talks about. 

A Few Days Ago.....

   I walked through the halls to head back to my room to charge up BB- and rest from a long mission with black squadron, when I heard Charlie’s voice in his room , too be honest I thought it was either RO-GR  or his old BB unit BB-7c, I was about to ignore it when I heard a woman's laugh ‘holy shit he has girl in his room , wait wasn’t he like into That supplier whatever their name was? ‘ I thought , to be fair I didn’t mean to eavesdrop but I sneak in and hear “It’s the usual Charlie boring old stuff, but I did sneak out and fly one of the ships” woman voice said as I watch from after and.... wow she looks like an angel, even though it’s a holo projector call but she also look like she what 16 or 17 which is not creepy at all “Well good thing your term as Queen will be up soon and heck you’ll get your chance to be part of the Resistance soon  Elena “ Charlie told her suppressing a chuckle  making her eyes roll , so that’s her name “ Charlie I swear you sometime a man child at times”  she laughs a bit but then frowns “i have to go now , they are nagging me  to deal with their political crap.” she told him causing charlie to says his goodbyes to her. “So you must’ve heard everything Poe?” Charlie asked causing me to jump a bit, “ Not much” I told him and asked “who’s that girl your talking to?because she’s a bit young to be your girlfriend” Charlie made a disgust face ‘First of all ew Poe that’s disgusting   you already know i’m into the supplier, and two that girl is Elena Cass she’s my older sister you creep” He told me and I stumble a little ‘that girl is charlie sister ?’ “that’s your sister? Your pilot sister ”  Charlie laughs “yep that’s her alright , she 25 years old and I bet she’ll beat your ass in flying” I laugh at his comment there is no way that that girl can beat me in flying. “so does she have a boyfriend or something?” I asked lifting an eyebrow , earning a zap from BB-7c ow , “No she doesn’t have time .....I think” charlie shrug “Poe can I ask you something?”  I nod “ Of course Charlie” He sigh “My sis has some.... issue after our parents death but she getting better mostly and all.” that wasn’t a question though “ What I am asking is that If something ever happens to me ,please keep an good eye on her as in keep her safe  and i’m letting her to take my place as commander of my squadron incase I die ?” he asked, now that’s the question, I thought about it and answer “yeah... yeah I can do that “ He smile and told me to leave his room.

Now...

I walked up to Elena and bb-8 “That was nice piloting out there “ I said to her , she look up at me and she stare at me like she seen an angel with those different shade of blue eyes and there was a small smile on her lips. “Thank you.....” she said softy , which  I kinda find it cute and it was different ,there was a hint of shyness in her . She blink couple of times “is this your droid ?” she asked , which I replied a  yes,  and then I introduce my self “I’m Poe , Poe Dameron”  I said offering a hand to shake  which she took my hand which it was small and soft and then replied “ I’m Elena “ “I know”I told her 

[writer-room]

Well, Could’ve Been Worse

AO3

Summary: No sane person would be calling at this house if it wasn’t important. His phone said it was two in the morning. Lovely. His phone also said Tim was calling. Also known as: not a normally sane person. If Tim had gone on another frenzied Red Bull-induced investigation and gotten himself stuck again, Kon was gonna kill him. Also known as: Tim makes stupid decisions when on a caffeine crash + sleep deprivation. Kon, sadly, has to deal with that at the worst hours.

Kon’s powers were...weird. Unstable, if you wanted to be specific. Not as bad as it used to be, but it still wasn’t the same as Clark’s. Thank you again, Luthor. 

Which means that if he’s conscious enough to check every now and again, he can do the whole ‘call my name and I’ll be there in about four seconds’ schtick, but it didn’t go so well when he was asleep. Cassie said he slept like the dead, to which Bart insisted that if there was ever food involved, he’d be wide awake faster than he could run across a room. 

Both were ridiculous, but whatever.

Tim, at least, had tried to assure Kon that surely Clark couldn’t hear disasters going on when he was asleep. Tim wasn’t one who was often wrong, but Kon was willing to play a risky betting game on this one.

It made sleeping a little anxiety-inducing for a while, knowing that if something happened. he wouldn’t know anything about it until he woke up. Tim had said that it was normal to hate sleeping because of hero business. 

Kon always thought of that comment every time he caught Tim awake at ungodly hours for days on end, staying up purely because of caffeine and spite. He should probably bring that up sometime. 

The point was, Kon didn’t hear things when he was asleep. Which could be a good and bad thing in its own right. He isn’t, however, impervious to an obnoxiously loud ringing going off by his head.

.

Kon snorted as he woke, his phone ringing eerily sudden in the quiet of the Cave. He groaned, sitting up from where he’d passed out on the couch in the Cave. He suspiciously remembered something involving Cassie and arm wrestling landing him here, but he was too tired to care about that now.

His phone was on the ground beside him, a wonder nobody had stepped on it, especially Bart. It rang painfully loud, though that was probably because it was the first sound he’d heard in the past...however many hours it’d been. Kon resigned himself to slowly reaching down and pulling his phone up as he leaned against the arm of the couch. No sane person would be calling at this house if it wasn’t important. 

His phone said it was two in the morning. Lovely.

His phone also said Tim was calling. Also known as: not a normally sane person.

If Tim had gone on another frenzied Red Bull-induced investigation and gotten himself stuck again, Kon was gonna kill him.

That’s a lie, he wouldn’t. Cassie, however, would kill him if he told her. So he could probably settle for that.

With a sigh, Kon mentally prepared to hear incoherent rambling he’d need to find Bart to interpret, and accepted the call.

“It’s two in the morning, Tim.” Was the first thing he said, letting his annoyance seep in.

“It’s like, two twenty-four,” Tim’s voice rasped over the phone, far scratchier than normal. “So if you woke up at normal times like everyone else, this wouldn’t be as big an issue.”

“You are not the person to be telling me how to go about my sleep schedule.” Kon scolded lightly. “So I sleep in till noon, so what?”

“You woke up at three--” Tim cut off with a series of coughing coming through. “--p.m yesterday.”

“Not the point,” Kon muttered. “Why are you calling? I thought you were still in the Cave?”

There was shuffling on the other line, and Tim’s voice came through more faded, like he was further from the phone.

“Oh, yeah, left a few hours ago on patrol,” Tim wheezed. “Thought I’d be back before Bart woke up. He’s been wakin’ at like...six a.m or something.”

“Tim,” Kon started.

“It was barely a patrol,” Tim puffed. “More like...doin' rounds and...grabbing something from Denny’s.”

Tim’s words were slurring here and there. He did so a lot when he started having caffeine withdrawal or was coming down from a Red Bull rush. Or was sleep deprived. None of those options were comforting.

“Did you find some villains?” Kon inquired, praying that there was a less ridiculous reason he was being woken up so late. “You need backup or something?”

“Woulda called like...the headquarters if I did, dude.”

Yeah, something was wrong.

“What’s this all about, then?” Kon asked, swinging his legs off the edge of the couch and standing. “Where are you?”

“Okay, okay,” Tim mumbled, his voice closer to the phone now. “Uh, you know...the Denny’s...but it’s by that weird tiny mall with the Starbucks?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m about...two streets over from that. By a bustop. Don’t worry, don’t worry, street lamps are out.” Tim assured quickly.

“The street lamps are out?” Kon repeated.

“Broke ‘em.”

“Course you did,” Kon sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he stood up. “Seriously, man, what’s going on? What happened?”

“M’fine,” Tim lied, poorly. “Just don’t like...tell Cassie. She’ll kill me. With her eyeballs.”

“Tim, I’m way too tired for you to dodge around questions right now.” Kon groaned. “What happened and why do you need me? If you're not answering this outright, I’m hanging up and going back to bed.”

That’s also a lie. A bad one, at that. He’d probably stay on the phone all night if Tim needed him to. Though he’d definitely try and wake Cassie or Bart to help him out, he’s not that loyal.

“I was getting to it!” Tim whined, and oh wow, he must really be delirious. Bart was gonna be so mad if there weren’t any videos later. “I just kinda...wasn’t payin’ attention n’ stuff.”

“Paying attention to what?” 

“The road,”

Kon froze.

“What?”

“Got hit by a car,” Tim slurred. “S’cool though, got outta there fast. Happened like...five streets back.”

“What the hell, Tim?” Kon nearly dropped his phone, remembering last-minute to grab his jacket off the floor as he started to race to the nearest exit out of the Cave. “You need to start with the ‘I got hit by a car’ part, not correcting what time it is!”

“There was time,” Tim mumbled. “I’m not dyin’ or anything.”

“You were hit by a car.” Kon stressed, already in the air. Thank you, inhuman speed.

“But I’m not dying,” Tim said simply. “Doesn’t count. Just hurts like a b--”

“Hang on, I’m nearby.” Kon talked over him, landing on a rooftop. The streets had grown recognizable fast, and thankfully, if Tim was right about his coordinates, he wasn’t that far from the Justice Cave. Probably wasn’t smart to fly at ridiculous speeds at two in the morning when he was barely awake, but he was too preoccupied to care.

“Oh, cool.” 

Kon shoved his phone in his pocket as he flew down from the rooftops, far slower this time. He scanned the streets quickly, almost skimming right over the bus stop Tim was at. The lack of light, plus his darker costume, was not helping matters.

Sure enough, Tim was where he said he’d be. He wasn’t even sitting on the bench. More like dramatically draped over it with his arms keeping him upright and legs strewn behind him. The nearest street lamps had been shattered, probably with whatever Tim carried in his utility belt these days.

And Christ, Tim was a mess.

He must’ve been wearing a concealer, or it was extra pronounced tonight, because he had heavy bags under his eyes. His hair was a mess and falling into his eyes, his mask slightly askew. His costume wasn’t in awful shape, but his cape was twisted around so that it hung sideways rather than regularly situated on his back, and he had a few small tears here and there. Aside from the palms of his gloves, those had bigger tears. Plus he had scuffs of gravel and dirt.

And blood, there was blood, too. Blood on his hands, knees, and smears on the side of his face. But all in all, he looked more dazed and bruised than anything.

“No big deal, huh?” Kon said, crouching down beside his friend.

“Had worse,” Tim mumbled, resting his cheek on the bench. “M’just tired, really.” 

“That all?” Kon sighed, taking off his jacket as he debated if it would be worth it to patch up the small amount of bleeding he could see.

“Breathin’s being weird, too.” Tim added, as an afterthought. “Think I fractured something.”

“Of course you did,” Kon groaned, reaching out and turning Tim around so he was sitting upright, leaning against the bench.

Tim hissed in pain at the movement, eyes shutting for a moment as Kon paused, anxiously looking him over.

“Please don’t tell me you broke a rib,” Kon begged, more to himself than Tim as he reached out to feel his side.

“Ow, ow, ow!” Tim yelped, cringing away.

“Hospital,” Kon decided with a nod and a grimace. “You need a hospital.”

“I’m Red Robin,” Tim complained. “Can’t go to hospital. Dad would kill me.” He insisted, dramatically thunking his head back on the bench and throwing an arm over his eyes.

“Medical attention, then.” Kon said. “At least until you pass out so we can take you to a hospital when you can’t complain about it.”

“You're so mean,” Tim whined, shifting his arm slightly to give Kon a glare. “Bart wouldn’t treat me like this.”

“Bart would probably be having a panic attack.”

“S’why I called you,” Tim mumbled, slumping down and off the side of the bench, leaving Kon to jump and support Tim’s head before it conked against the concrete. “Cassie woulda yelled at me.”

“She’s definitely going to yell at you now,” Kon agreed, gently keeping his hand on the back of Tim’s head as he pushed him back upright. “How did this even happen? Don’t you have ridiculously fast reflexes or something?”

“It was a hit n’ run, I know it was.” Tim rasped, weakly shaking a fist.

“You said you fled the scene.”

“Was still totally a hit n’ run,”

Kon sighed, knowing he wasn’t going to win this argument tonight. None of the bleeding was concerning, so instead he settled for dumping his jacket over Tim’s shoulders. He also picked up Tim’s phone from where it’d been discarded on the pavement, shoving it in one of the jackets pockets.

“Pretty sure you're just too tired to notice anything,” He muttered quietly, scooping his arms underneath Tim’s knees and back.

“Was gonna get more coffee, swear it.” Tim mumbled, letting himself go completely limp as Kon picked him up. “Came outta nowhere,”

“Next time I catch you pulling all-nighters, I’m sitting on you till you get proper sleep.” Kon threatened, giving Tim a half-hearted shake as he rose into the air. 

“If you catch me,” Tim said cheerfully, giving a crooked smile.

Would’ve been a lot more charming if it weren’t for the fact it reopened what was apparently a still-healing cut on his lip.

Not that it was charming to begin with. Injured best friend, not the time. Kon shook his head.

“I’m Superboy, it won’t be hard.” Kon boasted, flying at a grudgingly slower speed back to the Cave. It probably wouldn’t help Tim if he went back at the same speed he arrived, the base wasn’t that far, anyway.

“You miss things all the time,” Tim huffed, raising a weak hand to presumably poke at Kon’s face, but ended up just flailing it around.

“Psh, not that often.” Kon rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah, you do,” Tim insisted, letting his head hang back, staring upside-down at the ground below them. “Obvious things. Miss ‘em all the time.”

“Like what?” Kon pressed. “And you're not allowed to say anything about the Justice League, they don’t count.”

Tim went quiet. Kon wondered for a brief, terrifying moment, that Tim really had passed out from his adrenaline rush before they made it to base. But then Tim raised his head and he could breathe easy.

Tim stared at him for a moment, eyes narrowed. It was his ‘I’m not sure if you're being sarcastic or actually an idiot’ face, which, honestly, could be better classified as ‘I’m judging you for being an idiot’ face, considering the circumstances he used it in.

Kon met his gaze, more than a little curious. Normally Tim would’ve started rattling off all the things he’s oblivious to on a daily basis. The hesitation was...well, not normal. He chalked it up to Tim being loopy from his whole ordeal.

“Stuff,” Tim decided, his head falling back to its original position so fast that Kon cringed.

“Descriptive,” Kon sighed, grateful for the sight of the Cave, speeding their flight. 

“Shut up, I’m tired and broken.” Tim mumbled, his voice laced with drowsiness. 

“Then maybe, and here’s a thought,” Kon said, landing just outside the Cave. “You don’t go days without sleep to the point you get hit by a car of all things.”

Tim opened his mouth to protest, but Kon talked right over him.

“I know, I know, it’s very difficult to ask of you.” He said, his playful snooty tone lessened by the smugness that seeped in. “But with the right routine, I’m sure we could figure something out.”

“You sound like a horrifying combination of Alfred and Dick.” Tim grumbled, no less limp as Kon carried him inside the base. “I wish you had your sunglasses so I could break them--wait,” Tim raised his head again, squinting at Kon. “Where’s your glasses?”

“Didn’t really have time to grab them after, you know, you woke me up at two in the morning and stalled in telling me you were bleeding at a bus stop.” Kon snarked.

“It was two twenty-four,” Tim muttered quietly, drawing his arms up to his chest and looking away.

And dammit, Kon was almost convinced Krypto was rubbing off on Tim too much. The guy looked like a puppy after stealing food from the table. Which, frankly, was something Kon would also do if he had to eat the same thing every day. Clark hadn’t seen it that way, but whatever.

Kon held back a sigh, shuffling through the hallways. He could probably put Tim on the couch, right? Christ, Cassie was gonna bite off his head for waking her up.

“Just be careful, alright?” Kon murmured, resituating Tim in his arms. He got slippery after a while. “You don’t need to be up at all hours of the night to patrol,” He said, frowning to himself.

Tim reached up one of his arms and looped it around Kon’s neck, aiding Kon in holding him properly. His face turned to the side and pressed into Kon’s chest, huffing.

“You have your family to look after Gotham at night, anyway. That helps, doesn’t it?” Kon added.

“S’not the same,” Tim mumbled, his voice muffled.

Kon would’ve argued, really, he often does, but tonight just wasn’t the night. Tim was too battered for much of anything to sink in, and honestly, he was still tired. And he was pretty sure if he spent another ten minutes around Tim with nobody else to buffer, his common sense was going to finally kick in and make him start freaking out even more.

“At least take someone with you,” Kon settled on, craning his neck down so he could press his nose into Tim’s hair. It was still frazzled and greasy. “Bart’s already awake at ungodly hours. Jinny’s down for almost anything. Hell, I’d come with you if you asked.”

“You’d come without me asking.” Tim muffled, and Kon swore if he could see Tim’s face he’d be smirking. “Besides, you complain.”

“I complain, but that doesn’t mean I won’t do it.” Kon huffed, slowly moving his head back as he came to the couch he had, previously, been having a rather nice sleep on. “And honestly, if someone like you can end up getting hit by a regular car of all things, you probably shouldn’t be out on the streets on your own.”

“Piss off, it’s a bad night.”

“Keep telling yourself that,” Kon rolled his eyes, slowly leaning down so he could place Tim on the couch.

“Ow,” Tim groaned, his arm tightening around Kon’s neck as he was set down, his other hand coming up to fist the side of his uniform.

“Scale of one to ten, how bad can you guess it is?” Kon winced, slowly slipping his hands out from under Tim.

“Mm, well, it's not broken.” Tim slurred, refusing to unwrap his arm from Kon’s neck, leaving the super to awkwardly bend forward. “Probably just cracked. If it was broken, I would've lost a lung by now.”

“Ah,” Kon hummed anxiously, raising a hand to unwrap Tim’s arm from him. “That...is a nice thought.”

“Just told you it wasn’t broken,” Tim grumbled, glaring up at Kon as his arm was pried free.

“Your way of being comforting isn’t the best,” Kon admitted with a tilt of his head, stepping back. “Now you stay here, alright? I’m gonna get Cassie.”

“Say your goodbyes now,” Tim groaned, pawing at his face until he caught the edge of his domino mask. “After today, I would’ve been better dumped in a ditch.” 

“It’s still nighttime,” Kon reminded.

“Details,” Tim waved his free hand, the other peeling off his mask and letting it fall to the floor.

“Whatever, just don’t move.” Kon warned, pointing a finger close to Tim’s face. His eyes were unfocused and hazy, and the sight of that only added to the pit that was opening in Kon’s chest.

“Aye aye, captain.” Tim mumbled, giving a half-hearted salute before letting his arm dangle off the couch. The other came up to clutch at the jacket still around his shoulders, turning his head into it.

Kon has never so badly wished he’d taken his phone out of his jacket earlier so he could take a picture. Never, he swears.

And, of course, he also wished Tim wasn’t injured. That was the main issue here, really.

Kon hesitated, stepping around the couch and glancing back. Tim was never known to stay put when asked, but it seemed this time he was being merciful. 

One friend down, two more to survive.

Could’ve gone worse, he reasoned as he creeped (in a poor attempt at being quiet) down the hallways towards Cassie’s room. A car was nothing. Except for a reminder that, unlike the rest of them, Tim wasn’t superpowered--but that was an anxiety for Tim to get offended about later. 

And if Tim woke up hours later in a hospital, with Dick on the other line and Cassie seconds away from cracking the rest of his bones herself, at least Kon could rest easy knowing that he wouldn’t be pulling that stunt again any time soon. Or at least be more careful. He’d take what he could get.

[tardytothepardy]

My Review of "A Court of Silver Flames" (because it's too long for Goodreads)

~`,Spoiler-free summary/review idk,`~

In "A Court of Silver Flames", the story centers around two characters that were previously in the "A Court of Thorns and Roses" series, Cassian and Nesta. As far as I can tell, this story takes place about a year after "A Court of Frost and Starlight", where Nesta is in a bad mental state. To cope with the events in "A Court of War and Ruin", she has taken to excessive drinking and sleeping with random people. The members of the Inner Court allowed her to do this for a while, but as the book begins, it is made clear that they won't let her do that anymore. It is decided that she will be taken to the House of Wind, along with Cassian and Azriel, so she can be separated from everything and heal. The reasoning behind putting Nesta in the House of Wind is that the only ways anyone can easily go to or leave the house is by flying or winnowing, neither of which are things she can do. There is a set of 10,000 stairs that she can take, but seeing as they are 10,000 stairs, it's pretty difficult.

Throughout the story, Nesta is forced to come to terms with her difficult memories and her powers, which she has pushed away in an effort to retain as much of her prior humanity as she can. It is soon revealed that her powers are connected to three ancient magical items, collectively called the "Dread Trove", and Nesta is tasked to find as many as she can to keep Briallyn, one of the human queens, who has a similar connection to the items, from obtaining them and wielding powers that could completely destroy the world.

While all of this is going on, it is revealed that Feyre is pregnant. It isn't all happy news, however, because it seems that complications (of the deadly variety) have become known, and no one knows what to do to save her (let alone herself because she's not even aware of it hooray Rice Hand you're doing fabulously).

I think as a whole, one thing that this book struggled with is pacing. For the majority of the book, I didn't feel that the characters were actively trying to stop The Bad Guys, it almost felt that they took action every so often, as if they randomly remembered that these events are happening. Most of the book is focused on the development of the relationship between Cassian and Nesta, and everything else falls around that, which would be fine if the other events were of a smaller scale, like planning a party or something (idk lmao), rather than the fate of literally the <i>entire world</i>, both the Fae and human world. A lot of the things that happened in this book seemed like they were resolved within the last 50 pages of the book, one after another, it just felt odd.

(spoilers for the entire book below the "keep reading"!)

~`,Spoilers from here on out,`~

So like I said in the beginning, it starts with Nesta in her house. It's from Cassian's point of view, so I got to endure two things that really fucking irritated me: first was where she was living. It was a similar line of thought from the "ACOFAS" description, that Velaris doesn't have slums, but if it did have a slum, Nesta would be living in it. But it doesn't have slums, but this place is still icky. Cassian acknowledges that he's stayed in worse, but this place is still icky, yucky, blecky, and gross. Second thing that irritated me was when he first saw her. He describes her as having "long bare legs, an elegant sweep of hips, tapered waist--too damn thin--and full, inviting breasts that were at odds with the new, sharp angles of her body" (10). She was thin, very thin, but not her boobs. Nope, those badonks were still (somehow) plenty large. This might be the fault of me trying to understand Fae bodies by comparing them to human bodies, but I simply do not understand how that is supposed to work. Boobs are made of fats and tissues, if you're losing weight, you're gonna lose boob. Whatever.

Cassian proceeds to take Nesta to one of (apparently 5. Rice Hand and Feyre have five houses, why) Feyre's houses, where it is soon made clear that an intervention is being staged. This has to be one of the worse ones out there, because oh my fucking god everyone is so goddamn hostile towards Nesta. Amren and Nesta were previously friendly, then they had an unresolved (and unexplained) falling out, and now holy shit Amren is constantly baiting Nesta, making snide remarks. Rice Hand seems to be offended by Nesta simply because she doesn't like him or Feyre, like I don't get why he's so aggressive towards her (and that shit continues for the majority of the book it's so annoying), but somehow everyone there is surprised when Nesta is aggressive, that she throws insults, that she's rude.

Anyway, after Nesta is toted to the House, she instantly tries to find a way out, and that's when the 10,000 stairs come in. (Tangent, in the book it says that the stairs are about a foot tall each. 10,000, 1 foot tall stairs. That would mean the House of Wind is at least 10,000ft tall, but seeing as the House has multiple levels, it's even taller than that. This building is so goddamn tall, did Maas even think about that? It's nonsensical! Anyway) She tries to go down them, but she fails miserably. She's underweight, I wouldn't be surprised if she's malnourished, she's in no state to climb down 10,000 stairs.

So that's where the training comes in. Cassian takes her to Windhaven, an Illyrian camp (place thing idk), to train, but she just refuses. After 3 days of her not doing anything, Cassian is ready to throw in the towel (I thought,,, I would think that since he's had to discipline out-of-line soldiers before he'd do better than 3 fucking days but whatever), but then he remembers what she's said about it all three of those times, that she's not gonna do it in front of everyone (because if you didn't remember, the Illyrians are massively sexist and so of course no one has anything better to do than gather round to see some random woman attempt to train but whatever), so he just has her train within the House. One top of the House, it seems. I don't know how big this House is supposed to be, but the roof at least would have to be huge to allow for multiple people to train and work out, spaced out evenly, and not be at risk for falling off. But he has her train there, issue resolved.

What is this training, you may ask? It's just basic stuff, like stretching, balance, strength training, and eventually grappling with so much sexual tension you can barely see your hand in front of your face (it's like a fog as far as I'm concerned), casual stuff.

Along with this training, Nesta is also assigned to work in the library, which is also a sort of refuge or something for a bunch of priestesses who have survived various forms of abuse or assault. It's one big safe space that also has old ass books. Sounds great. She has to work there for six hours, I believe, everyday, along with the training, and at the library she meets someone named Gwyn. Gwyn is a priestess, she's been there for a little while (it doesn't actually say how long, now that I think about it) and fun fact, she's a quarter river nymph. The person she works under is shown using that fact as an insult, but only once, because then Nesta lets her eyes go silver, which freaks them out, and then Gwyn doesn't have to deal with it anymore.

Speaking of silver eyeballs, let's talk about her powers. What are they, how do they work? What are the limits of her powers, etc.? It's not really stated, beyond vague stuff of her powers being derived from something ancient, before the Fae's time, and that she's really powerful. At one point in the book when Rice Hand had to go into her mind (she was having night terrors), he described her powers as "pure death". On one occasion as she was trying to go down the 10,000 steps (which is a recurring thing throughout the whole book), she fell partway down and when she caught herself, she saw that she somehow burned her handprint into the stone. At another point when she's a good way into her training, she's punching something and it is later shown that she again burned through the wood (it was a piece of wood wrapped in cloth which sounds like an absolute delight to punch for a sustained period of time), but somehow the burn mark was cold? Much later in the book she literally un-alives someone, like she didn't kill them, she regressed their age so much that they were un-alive. (She basically hit the "undo" button on their life) Additionally, since her powers that she got from the Cauldron have connected her to the "Dread Trove" items, she is able to find them very easily and use them without issue. With all this information, it's still not clear as to what the limits to her power are. I suppose she is the limitation, because she could choose to use her power to gather the items of the "Dread Trove" and use them to manipulate worlds and time and fucking death itself, but she doesn't. And honestly I'm not sure how I feel about that, I'm kinda iffy on the idea of a character having seemingly unlimited power (especially when they only use it a handful of times, if at all), but I suppose it doesn't really matter because by the end of the story, she gives back most of her power to the Cauldron anyway, so any questions about that are just,,, thrown to the wind.

The characters in this story were a pretty mixed bag. I can say full-heartedly that I did not like Rhysand (there, I said his actual name instead of Rice Hand, Rice Hand is funnier to me). I don't think I've ever particularly liked him, he was too smarmy for my liking, and then when we got a look into his mind courtesy of ACOFAS, all I got out of it was that whatever is going on in his head does not match his outwardly appearance and demeanor whatsoever. (On the outside, he seems like he'd be the one to smirk a lot, probably use lots of sarcasm, on the inside it seems like if someone said "boobs" he'd start laughing uncontrollably. Like, it's weird. Idk what was going on in that book, it was weird.) But in this book, I did not like him, from the beginning. He was so hostile, so aggressive towards Nesta, at any given moment. I don't know if he had any sympathy at all for her situation, because he certainly didn't act like it. At anything Nesta would do, he would push back.

For example, when Gwyn decided to join Nesta in her training, Rice Hand said in her mind to not do anything (in the book, he said, "You are to treat Gwyn with kindness and respect." (pg. 304)), and the whole thing angers me for two reasons, the first being that Nesta's kindness was the reason that Gwyn was there in the first place. Which leads to the second reason, that it seems that Rice Hand is so convinced that Nesta is an unlikable person that she couldn't have possibly made friends (or at least friendly acquaintances) during her time at the House and working in the library.

Following that remark, Nesta noted that it seemed that Rice Hand didn't particularly like the fact that she and Cassian were a thing, which also ticks me off. Am I a huge fan of Cassian and Nesta being together? They're fine, but it's again that idea that she couldn't have possibly warmed up to someone that she has to be around the majority of the time, and maybe someone that doesn't default their mentality of her as "whatever she's doing, it's wrong/bad". To give credit to Cassian, he did figure out that Rice Hand said something to her and chided him for doing so. He actually caught Rice Hand doing it a few more times within the book and got after him about it those times, which is nice.

But that's not the only reason why I specifically did not like Rice Hand in this book. There's another thing he did which I feel is so much worse than what he did or said to Nesta. That thing would be that he kept information about Feyre from Feyre, specifically about her own pregnancy. Now, I said in the beginning that she had a troubled pregnancy. Basically, her baby had wings, but her body wouldn't be able to safely deliver the baby because of those wings. Before you ask "Hey, doesn't Feyre have shape-shifting powers?" or "What about a c-section?", Maas tucked away those easy solutions by saying that Madja, the person overseeing Feyre's pregnancy, told her that shape-shifting might put the baby at risk for more complications, and as far as the c-section thing goes, they just uh, they just haven't seemed to figure out how to do that. These Fae people live for hundreds of years and no one has ever figured out how to properly do a c-section, I guess. Additionally, it seems that Illyrian wings are particularly special, compared to the wings of the other two groups of winged Fae, Seraphim and Peregyrn, because whereas the wings of the Seraphims or Peregryns can move, allowing for an easier birth, apparently (for some fucking reason) Illyrian wings are bony? Like, in utero, they're already bony and difficult to move, which is where all those complications come in.

He told none of this to Feyre. All she knew about her own pregnancy, was that there might be some complications, she didn't know that there was a gigantic mortality rate with pregnancies like this, nothing like that. He purposely kept this information from her, it seems that the whole fucking Inner Court voted on it, or some shit. When Feyre was told of this whole thing from Nesta, Amren said it was to protect Feyre, to keep her from getting stressed or scared, which could worsen things further. But I counter that Amren, with this: How fucking scared do you think Feyre would have been, when she was in labor and everything, and things were rapidly spiraling out of control? She would have been terrified! Don't you think that would've affected something, because I fucking think it would have! Was there ever any intent to tell her about this, or did all of them just decide to never tell her?

The reason why Nesta told Feyre about it was to hurt her, initially, but it was also because she found out that the Inner Court had made a decision about her, personally, because she had accidentally made more "Dread Trove" items by imbuing her power in three swords that she made while at a blacksmith. She found out (via Cassian's absolutely terrible way of bringing up the swords she made) that they were planning to take them away (or something, I don't specifically remember), and that's when she went to Amren's place and demanded more information. When Feyre was brought to intervene, Nesta told Feyre what Cassian had told her (despite the fact that he was totally supposed to keep that a secret but whatever dude). Feyre was shocked, understandably, but she wasn't angry at Nesta for that, and I can't tell you how happy I was about that, I am so happy that Feyre wasn't angry at Nesta for telling her about this. She actually was angry at the other people for deciding to keep this information from her. I just,, I'm really happy that she wasn't angry at Nesta. Everyone else, on the other hand, was fucking pissed at her, including Rice Hand. He was absolutely livid, but the funny thing is, that I don't give a shit, honestly. He should have never kept that a secret in the first place.

I think as a whole, his behavior is explained away because "his mate is pregnant", so I guess he has full clearance to be obnoxious and aggressive and withhold information without the knowledge of all parties involved. What happened to always giving Feyre a choice, Rhysand? What happened to that? Did she only get a choice when you decided to give her one? Because that is certainly what this felt like.

Another thing that Rice Hand did that I would place in between his bullshit against Nesta and his bullshit against Feyre, is another thing that he did to Feyre. So, back in ACOTAR, I believe, when Feyre was still with Tamlin, Tamlin infamously trapped Feyre in a huge magical bubble, where she couldn't leave Tamlin's house. Everyone agreed that that wasn't the best thing for Tamlin to do, and Tamlin's punishment was completely equal to the evils he committed, one-hundred percent. (Not really, now he's stuck in his beast form, roaming the Spring Court in a state of anger and pain. Sympathy for him is quite the commodity in the books.) But what does any of this have to do with Rice Hand? Well, he basically did the same thing to Feyre, except rather than being stuck in a building, the shield is on her, and it's so strong that even her friends can't touch her without being hit by the shield. And when she's asked about it, Feyre just says that Rice Hand learned how to make shields from Helion, the High Lord of the Summer Court, and like,,,, is testing them out on her?? And we're all supposed to think this is fine? The shield is so intense that they can't even smell her (which is a thing, in this series. Fae people can smell other people, they have scents, idk man I'm just going with it), so effectively he's masking her entire existence, and no one has a problem with it. It's weird. It's not as bad as the pregnancy thing, but it's still not great.

I suppose since I'm talking about characters, I should talk about Cassian and Nesta, seeing as they did totally, undeniably become a Thing in this book. Idk how to really go about it, honestly. For the majority of the book, at least one of them was sure that the other didn't like them, or that they weren't deserving to be with the other, so that was fun. I don't particularly remember when, but at some point they both just,,, decided? to have casual sex, that it meant nothing (when it did, in fact, mean something), and it was like,,, a way of distancing themselves from the other. That is particularly the case with Nesta, who felt guilty for constantly pushing Cassian away at basically every turn. Apparently her attention was caught on him from like,,, the first time that she even saw him, way back when she and Elain were still human, in their cottage. She didn't love him or anything, but it was a Notice.

Despite that Notice, she still pushed him away, as I said, because she just didn't feel like she was good enough. Over the course of the book, Nesta quickly became ashamed of the life she had been living since being put in the Cauldron, which was all the drinking and sex (and that's it? Like, a lot of people in this book made it out to be this whole thing but I think that's basically all she did. Part of me feels like the main reason the Inner Court was so bothered by it in the first place was that she was billing it to them, who really wouldn't even notice the money spent anyway, given how much money they seem to have but whatever), and this was another thing that caused her to push away. (And then violently yo-yo back it was incredible) She also has been harboring a fuck ton of guilt over her father's death, which I think was something I worried about after reading ACOFAS? Idk, but it wasn't terrible. She acknowledged that she couldn't really do anything, that it was all over before she could move, but the main reason she felt so horrible about it, was because all this time, since her mother's death (and kinda before it?), she had been mean towards her father, constantly snubbing him, acting with disdain, etc., but during the war (in ACOWAR, it's so helpfully acronymed), he came to help with a fleet of ships, and the one he was on, he named after her. It showed that, despite all that she had said and done to him for all these years, he still loved her, and she felt that she didn't deserve that.

She felt guilty about what had happened to Elain, and felt angry that she wasn't able to do more. Her relationship with Elain kinda soured at a point, because it went from Elain being the withdrawn, sallow, underfed and distant one, to her being that, except with Elain, she would just sit in a chair in an empty room and wallow in her own misery, whereas Nesta used other aforementioned ways to try to forget. Throughout a lot of this book, Nesta and Elain are at each other's throats, and they did, apparently, make up, but I don't know when. For how much of the book is spent about them being at odds with each other, there's an odd lack of them actually making up with each other and settling all that. It's weird.

As a whole though, the center of Nesta's issues stem from the fact that she feels helpless. As she put it, all these things happened to her, she didn't do anything about it. She didn't (in most cases, couldn't) do anything to get herself out of those situations. She felt she lacked agency, in essence. I believe that is mostly why she acted the way she did, because then she could control how others felt about her. The other reason why she acted the way she did, is that her mother trained her to do so.

When her family was still rich (and their mother was still alive), Nesta was trained to be absolutely vicious in the ballroom. She knew how to win people over with small gestures or expressions, and how to read people with a glance. She also knew how to dance, ridiculously well it seems. There is a point in the story when, to make sure that Eris, a member of the Autumn Court that they had been using for information, was still friendly with them, she was chosen to dance with him, to make sure that the Night Court was still in his favor. So, she danced with him. By the end of it, Eris apparently wanted to marry her, and you can fucking imagine how pissed Cassian was about that (I do think that at this point in the book, Nesta and Cassian were most assuredly a Thing, whether either of them acknowledged it or not), but the whole point of it was to show that Nesta was really in tune with music, and that she knows exactly how to meddle in the politics to win in her favor.

Her mother raised Elain to be a perfect princess, to be married off to someone with lots of money. Her mother raised Nesta to be powerful (but, from Nesta's own thoughts, she remembers asking her mother if she was going to marry a person the same way Elain was, but her mother didn't respond). As for Feyre, Nesta says that their mother seemed to mostly forget or avoid Feyre, because she wasn't quite right or something. I'm not sure.

There is a little thing where Nesta thinks of herself as a caged beast stuffed in a pretty dress, because she remembers that she's always had to restrain herself to make sure that nothing went wrong. When her mental health declines, it is equated to wolves encroaching her space, snarling her doubts and fears, and how she used to deafen them using people or alcohol. It wasn't ever enough, but it's what she did.

One thing that did help with the wolves was something she learned from Gwyn, called Mind Stilling (cough cough it's just meditation cough wheeze), a practice used by an extinct group of female warriors called Valkyries. (Yup, just like the Old Norse Valkyries.) Throughout this book, Nesta, Gwyn, and another Illyrian woman named Emerie (along with a few others but they basically only are present in theory) all trained with Cassian (and Azriel, he showed up later on, just in case Maas thought you forgot about him) to become the new Valkyries. It turns out that Cassian knew of them, I think most of the Inner Court knew them or at least knew of them (which is what happens when you're over five hundred fucking years old jfc) before they died in battle. There are a couple portions of this book that are mostly just training montages, with added notes of "it would have taken forever to build muscles as a human, but being Fae meant that Nesta could get stronger much faster", just in case you thought that 3 training montages was a lil too fast.

All this training does culminate into something by the end of the book, almost literally. I feel like a lot of this book is just watching Cassian and Nesta bounce off one another (in more ways than one lmao), and then Maas at some point realized, "Oh shit I have to actually make these things mean something!" and so the payoff for all the training, so to speak, and Feyre's pregnancy are both resolved by the end of the book, just barely.

The training thing is resolved by Gwyn, Emerie, and Nesta (in that order, it was specified that Nesta took like, three days after Emerie and Gwyn to complete her training because she was so busy probably staring at Cassian and thinking about... stuff. That's basically what both of them were doing for a healthy portion of this 700+ page tome) cutting a white silk ribbon that was tied up to a pole. I guess the idea was that if they are able to cut a piece of ribbon fluttering in the wind, they have mastery over themselves and their weapons. Personally, I get it. Ribbons are evasive as fuck and will gain enough sentience to move away from you just enough so you can't grab them. I know for certain that I would not be able to do this.

Now, I've mentioned Emerie a few times now, who is she? During the three or so days at the Illyrian camp, Nesta comes to know an Illyrian woman named Emerie. She's a shopkeeper in the village, and she likes keeping her store neat. Her family doesn't like that she owns the shop, and wants it to be carried over to one of her relatives. One of the times that Nesta visits her, one of Emerie's cousins is there, spewing stupid nonsense about how she can't run a store on her own. (He ends up dying, in case you were wondering.) She seems like a pretty interesting character, and she and Nesta bond over their shared interests in books, and that they've both been through some shit. In Emerie's case, her wings were clipped, so she can't fly. It is(or was?) a practice that was(is?) pretty common in Illyrian society, because clearly no one wants the wamen flyin around, who else is gonna do the cookin and cleanin and child rearin? Emerie ends up joining Nesta and Gwyn in training, with her main motivation similar to Nesta's: that she never wants to feel or be powerless again.

I've talked about the training a few times now, and I've mentioned how it led to something, without saying what it leads to, so I'll say it here: it leads to the Blood Rite, which is an Illyrian coming-of-age sorta thing, where the participants (typically the male Illyrians, like I said they just can't have the wamen beating them at anything it'd hurt their wittle egos) are put in this forest and they are tasked to scale a mountain (at least one) within a week, and fight off any monsters trying to eat them, or opponents trying to beat them. It's pretty common for people to die in these.

Nesta, Gwyn, and Emerie landed themselves in this Blood Rite by being kidnapped, that's apparently how the participants are put in the Rite. There was something unusual about this one, however, in that someone (I think it turned out to be someone under the control of Briallyn) planted weapons all over the forest, which isn't allowed. Something that also isn't allowed in the Rite is magic, so the magic that Nesta has become accustomed to and now has a decent relationship with, is gone. Cool.

In the process of getting up the mountain, Gwyn nearly dies, she got shot in the leg by an arrow, and Emerie nearly drowns in a river. Nesta nearly gets stabbed by Emerie's cousin, the same guy who showed up in her shop that one time, but then he gets killed. Woohoo, violence!

Right as Nesta is fighting with Emerie's cousin, Cassian shows up, which is surprising because he wouldn't normally be able to be there: if outside forces help a participant get through the Blood Rite, it is then considered invalid, and both the participant and the outside person are promptly killed (Woohoo, violence!). Turns out that he's under the control of Briallyn, who shows up as well. She orders Cassian to kill Nesta (because of course), and rather than stab her, he stabs himself. This is when the un-aliving thing happens that I mentioned earlier. Nesta was so caught up in the rage and stress of being in the Rite, then the sheer fury of what was going on, and it was an instance of her mind going, "I will not let this happen to me" and so she slammed the "undo" button on Briallyn's existence. (Woohoo, violence!) All is well though, because apparently Cassian did not, in fact, stab himself.

All is not well though, because as this whole thing ends, Feyre's pregnancy issues begin. I won't go over in detail because I've already talked about it earlier, but basically she went into labor way too early, and things have only gotten worse. She's bleeding out, everyone is certain that she will die. And thanks to the fact that, in ACOWAR, Feyre and Rice Hand made a vow that, if one dies, the other will, there's also the risk that Rice Hand will die, and since the baby is so premature, so will the baby. So there are three lives at risk, and no one knows what the fuck to do about any of it.

Except Nesta. Well, she doesn't really know what to do, but she's trying something. She takes the items of the "Dread Trove" (remember those?) and she uses them to pause time, right before death (kinda like pausing right before your Sim's death to save your game), and pleads with the powers in the objects and within herself, to show her how to save Feyre and the baby, and she will give her powers back to the Cauldron from which she took them. The powers are basically like "k lol", and she saves Feyre and the baby (his name is Nyx, which is just,,, it's so fantasy fiction omfg), and she tells Cassian later that she also altered her fucking body so that it can carry an Illyrian baby. Has she, at literally any point in the series, let alone this book, ever even thought she wanted a child? Nope, but everyone gotta have babies. (I get that people change their minds, and Nesta seems to have a fuck ton of time ahead of her to think about it, but idk it just kinda came up out of nowhere. How about beginning research into situations like that and maybe learn how to safely perform a c-section, in this case, so that future situations don't turn out as they seem to have previously. Nesta fixing her own body won't affect the who-knows-how-many other people who might get into this situation. Then again, it's not on her to solve everyone's problems,,, idk man)

Rrrrighttt at the end of the book, it mentions that Cassian and Nesta are going to have a mating ceremony, which for all intents and purposes, might as well be a wedding they talk about it like a wedding some of the practices and traditions are reminiscent of a wedding, it's a wedding. But for some reason, they don't actually have the ceremony in this book, even though I imagine Maas could've totally done it. What's another few pages in a 700+ page book, right? So I imagine that the ceremony might come up again in the next book, because Something is going to happen then. I have no idea what that Something is going to be, but that's my guess.

I don't think I have many issues with this book in particular, it's more with just the series as a whole. I just have a lot of questions with this series, and I got even more questions from this book. Most of my questions circulate around the powers of the characters within the Inner Court, such as how does literally everyone's powers work?? Throughout this book, it kept referring to Cassian's magic, that he wears a bunch of thingies (they're called Siphons but they'll always be thingies to me) to contain that magic, but it never actually says what his magic is. As far as I can tell, there are like,, idk how to describe it but like kinda threads?? of magic, I guess, that come from his Siphons, but other than that it's just that he,,, punch? He fight good? I really don't know. From what I can gather, his abilities could stem from his life rather than any magic he has. (I think that could actually be more interesting, him not having any magic, and kinda lend another reason as to why so many fucking people in this book shit on him for being the way he is. They all throw "Prince of Bastards" or some similar title at him, as if he's the only bastard to have ever existed in Prythian like, bad guys, please come up with more insults. Call him a shithead or something like be creative I'm really not feeling it)

With Nesta, it also does a poor job of explaining her magic, it's just repeated that it's old, it's ancient, it's from another time, a time before the Fae, a time long forgotten, but like, bro, what is it. I guess I'll never know. Elain's power, which also stems from the Cauldron, is barely mentioned in this book, aside from them saying that it's either gone away, or gone dormant, so she's treated as though she has no powers (that is, whenever she actually shows up in the book. Elain is just,,, rarely in the series. What is she doing at any given time the world may never know).

I don't really think that Maas understands how many stairs 10,000 stairs would be. I don't think she gets how long 500 years would be, and what you would even be doing for the majority of that time. I don't think she has a scale for how much power she has flung at her characters, to the point of it all being nonsensical. Everyone has so much power, we're told that Rice Hand has a ridiculous amount of power, somehow Feyre has double his power, but Amren had even more power, but Nesta has even more power than that and it's just,,, can I please have a frame of reference because I simply do not understand. I don't think she even has much of an explanation for the powers she has given her characters, and two examples I can immediately think of are Mor and Azriel. Mor's powers have simply been stated as "truth", but have we ever seen her use that power? What the fuck does that even mean, does she have a freakin lasso of truth or some shit like I don't understand. Then with Azriel, he got some kind of shadow magic thing going on, but like even within the story, the characters don't seem to understand how it works. Even the people that have known Azriel basically their entire lives (Rice Hand and Cassian) don't understand it. So how the fuck am I suppose to understand?

I'm just going to end it here because jfc this thing is so long, it's 10 pages long in Google Docs, and I heavily doubt anyone is going to read this far. If you have, much thanks! To clarify, I do like the series (to some extent) I just,, I have a lot of questions. So many, I couldn't fit them in here because they didn't really have any answers in the books (any of them, as far as I'm aware). Idk. How do people write conclusions? It's beyond me. Agh, anyway, thanks for reading this.

[baffling-bisexual-quack]

Death Brings Us Closer

Hey!!! This is the first fic i’ve ever posted, so it’s kind of nerve-wracking. It’s a peter parker x reader fic, and i tried to be gender-neutral. Also it’s disregarding a ton of events in the movies... If anyone sees this, positive comments are encouraged :)

Warning: Swearing & near-death experience ( i don’t dive into that)

Summary: You’re recovering from a near-death experience with the avengers.

You jumped. It seemed uncalled for, but this was your personality. You were always bullied in college, but this was extreme. A group of kids, boys & girls alike had chased you up onto the roof of the Mettely dorms. The dusty ground was hard to get your fitting on, but they had pursued you up there with no problems. Now, they were backing into you. The main problem was that this roof had no barrier, so one wrong move and you would be flying down a 10-story drop. Might as well just kill yourself now. You gulped hard as you glanced behind you. The edge of the building was less than 2 feet away, and the people were still coming towards you. You needed a plan, and now.

“What, you afraid of heights?” The guy you assumed was the leader said. He had a smug look on his face.

The thing is, you were a spiteful person. If someone said you couldn’t do something, you went right ahead and did it, not caring whether you would get hurt or die. That was mainly the reason you’d reputation was so bad.

“You can’t survive that jump! Nobody can! So why don’t you just surrender now?” The rest of the people nodded & smirked, agreeing with the guy.

Like an idiot, you went “No one can survive it, huh? Then I’ll be the first!”

You jumped off the roof. Big mistake. The ground was cement under you. Nothing to break you fall. Your life flashed before your eyes. You didn’t think it would end at the age of 19. As your head hit the cement, you heard gasps had shouts from everyone around you. All you could feel was a throbbing pain in your lungs and your head. Well this is what death feels like, you thought. It was the last thing you thought before you blacked out, barely breathing. You didn’t hear a person trying to talk to you, you didn’t feel him pick you up, you didn’t see his car that he rushed you in to get you to the safest place he knew, where some of the best doctors were.

He didn’t know if you were alive anymore.

When you woke up, you could hear people discussing something about someone. Your head was throbbing and it felt like there was an elephant sitting on your stomach. You opens you eyes to see 5 different people who you had never met in your life standing over you. Wait, you may have seen two of them before, but right now, you believed everything and nothing.

“Hurgruphungf” you said trying to get up. You were quickly pushed back down by a boy.

“Where.... what... who...??” You mange to stutter out.

“Oh, you’re up. I can’t believe you’re alive. That was a pretty bad fall. What were you doing jumping off a 10-story building, anyway? Are you suicidal? That’s rough. Anyway, based on the diagnosis and some of the treatments...” You cut the boy off by covering his mouth with your hand, which had a metric ton of tubes taped to it.

“Who. The fuck. Are you.” You said, making it clear that there was no messing about with you.

“Ah, you probably don’t know me. We go to the same university, NYU? I’m in second year, and I think you’re in first? Do I have that right? Anyway, I’m Peter, and this is Bruce, Shuri, Dad, and Dr. Dad. Also known and Tony and Stephen.”

“Ah, yes, knowing there names. That makes me understand why I’m in a hospital bed and my head really hurts and I’m surrounded by a bunch of fucking geniuses!!!” You snapped back. It was just your nature in times like this that you got really sarcastic & snarky.

“Oh, I guess you wouldn’t remember. You jumped off the Mettely dorms roof? Possibly because you’re suicidal? I think? I mean you might not be, but, I-“ Peter was babbling, so you decided to help him by slapping your have over his mouth again.

“I’m not suicidal, those people were backing me into the edge of the roof and there was no barrier so I was going to fall. They’re these bullies and I’ve been their target since the first day I got to university but they never went so far as to almost push me off a building. Then one of them said I couldn’t jump off the side of the building so I had to prove them wrong, right? So I jumped off to show them I could survive and now I’m here.” You stopped to take a breath. By now everyone in the room was staring at you. Even the Bruce guy had stopped checking your vitals to stare at you. Peter gently removed your head from his face and asked,

“So you’re not suicidal?”

“Yeah.” You replied. You had decided that you liked him. For now. As long as he didn’t do anything idiotic or mean.  

“Good to know.” He said.

Then, the guy named Tony started taking about your injuries and what they needed to do. It bored you after about 30 seconds, and Peter noticed this and caught your eye, giving you a thumbs up. You gave him a small smile.

“Got it?” Tony concluded.

“Um, yeah, as long as there are no amputations and I can walk and stuff after.” You said, trying not to make it obvious you weren’t listening.

“No, no amputations. There will be surgery, though, and it will take about a year to recover.” The Stephen guy said. He looked like a wizard or something, with those clearly defined cheekbones.

“A fucking year??” You asked dubiously.

“Yes.” Stephen responded.

“Do you have a plan for keeping up with schoolwork?” Shuri asked.

“I don’t even have a ‘pla’” you respond. Peter gives a small laugh at your friends quote.

“Alright, we’re gonna have to put your under for this. Peter, out.” Bruce said, getting down to business.

“But I-“

“Out, Peter!”

“Hmph.”

—————————

After you had woken up, it was revealed that you had been asleep for a day and a half. Much longer than they had expected. But you were alive, and the surgery was a success. It left you feeling like shit.

Peter came to visit you with this really, really tall guy who didn’t look human. He was blonde with one blue and one brown-ish colour. He was wearing armour, which was weird because it didn’t seem like there was a fight going on. Also, he had a huge hammer. Were they planning to just kill you now?

“Hey, you’re up! I just wanted to check. This is my friend, Thor. Thor, this is... I actually don’t think I know your name! Weird. What is it?”

“It’s y/n.”

“Ah. Well, Thor, this is y/n.”

“Greetings, midgardian! I am Thor, god of thunder, king of Asgard.”

“Well, I’m y/n, the biggest idiot you’ll ever meet, who lives their life out of spite.”

Peter laughed a little at this. He seemed to like your sense of humour, which is a good sign.

“I am very unfamiliar with midgardian culture. Anything I should know?” Thor asked eagerly.

“Yes. Live by this word, which is ‘being in a total state of awareness’. The word is: Unagi.” You said, doing the hand motion with your first two fingers like a gun next to your eyeball. Thor gave you a confused look, but nodded along. Peter was laughing really hard, by was trying to hide it.

“Also, the best pickup line is ‘how you doin’?” Peter added on.

“I see.” Thor said, intrigued.

“What’re you guys telling him?” Bruce said, walking in to check on you to or like the ninth time today.

“Unagi.” You said, doing the hand motion.

“And ‘how you doin’?’” Peter said.

Bruce facepalmed. “Don’t listen to them. They’re trying to mess with you.”

“I am confused.” Thor said.

“Alright, you two need to get out so y/n can rest.” Bruce said, ending the conversation.

“Bye, y/n. By the way, I’m spider-man.” Peter said as he left.  

“Wait, what? You’re joking, right?” You said. Peter just smiled and left the room with Thor.

“He’s spider-man?” You ask Bruce, hoping that he was joking.

“Yeah, I guess you should know, since you’re gonna be here for awhile. He’s spider-man, I’m the hulk, Tony’s iron man and Stephen’s the sorcerer supreme. Cool, right?” Bruce said nonchalantly.

“Um, yeah. That’s kind of a big deal! I mean like I’m surrounded by avengers & stuff... like. Wow.” You said, slightly shocked.

“Do you wanna lift your arm?” Bruce asked. You knew the question was rhetorical, but you took the opportunity anyway.

“Oh, I wish I could, but I don’t want to.” You said, quoting friends again.

“You’re just like a friends quote machine, aren’t you?”

“Yyyyep!”

“So anyway, what’s going on for you?” Bruce asked.

“Well, I’m in a hospital bed surrounded by avengers, so that happens. You?”

Bruce sighed. “I’m trying to find a way to ask Thor out, but I don’t know how.”

“I’m not great with advice, but can I interest you with a sarcastic comment?”

Bruce have you a dirty look.

“Fine, I’ll stop.” You said.

“Really?”

“No.”

“Ok, well. I really like him, but he’s dated girls in the past and he might not be gay and I don’t want to ruin our really close friendship, y’know?”

“Yeah, that’s a tough situation. If he doesn’t like you than this is all a moo point. It’s like a cow’s opinion. It doesn’t matter. It’s moo.” You replies, hoping he wouldn’t choke the life out of you. Bruce laughed a little and went back to checking you.

Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad here.

—————————

“Come on! A horse would totally win in a fight with a cow!” You laughed, debating with Peter. You two had gotten really close over the past year. You had even gotten to go on a vacation with the avengers. Your life had pretty much gone back to normal. You had your own room in the avengers tower, because Bruce, Shuri, Tony and Stephen wanted to make sure you were ok. You would be leaving in a week, and it was sad to think you had to leave these people who’d basically become your family behind. It felt wrong. But they didn’t want you here, right? They were just being nice & caring for you. Yeah. It’s right to leave.

“Hey, you know Thor & Bruce went on a date?” Peter said.

“They didn’t!”

“They did! They’re a thing now!”

“Oh my god!”

“I know!”

“Ah, i’m gonna miss this.” You said kind of sadly.

“Yeah. Why do you have to go?” Peter pouted.

“It’s not helpful for me to stay here! I’m just a thorn in your guys’ side.”

Peter gave you a disappointed look. Over the course of the year, he had fallen in love with you. He tried really hard to repress it, but he just loved everything about you and it broke his heart that you had to go. You would see each other on campus, but it wasn’t the same. The worst part is you were totally oblivious to it.

“Do you ever have bad days?” Peter asked.

“Sure, I have my bad days, but then I remember what a cute smile I have. Hey, I have an idea for a trick we can play on Thor.” You said, a mischievous smile on your face.

“Do you wanna get Loki to help?”

“Yes. Trust me, it’ll be great.”

—————————

A week later, it was the day of your departure. By 9:00 am, you had gotten all of your stuff together. It was only a backpack of clothes, because that’s all you really needed when you were there. The avengers supplied the rest. You went to the living room where most of the avengers were to say goodbye.

“Hey, guys. Just wanted to say bye before I leave.”

Stephen and a couple other people stood up and walked over to talk to you.

“You sure have made a fast recovery for someone who almost died a year ago.” Tony joked. He was practically hanging off Stephen’s side.

“Yeah. Well. You know how it is.” You said.

“I’m going to miss all your friends quotes.” Bruce said. You knew this was genuine. You two were also pretty close.

“Could I recommend watching a little more ‘ESPN’ and a little less ‘E.’?” You knew it would make Bruce laugh.

After all the other goodbyes were done, Peter came in to say goodbye. You were going to miss that asshole so much. He came in and you and him stood in front of the elevator facing each other.

“Bye, Peter.” You practically whispered. You were forcing yourself not to cry. Instead of responding, he stepped towards you, put your head in his hands, and kissed you.

It was slow and nice, soft but still firm. You were standing there in shock for a few seconds. You had never really felt love for Peter, but as he kissed you you could feel yourself fall in love with him. It didn’t take you long to relax and start kissing him back, hands moving to his waist to pull him even closer. You had both totally forgotten that every single avenger was standing right there. When you both finally pulled back, staring at each other for what seemed like eternity. His eyes were so chocolaty brown. How had you never noticed that? He gave out a little nervous laugh, surprised you had kissed him back. The moment ended when Bruce cleared his through to draw to your attention that everyone was staring at you. You glanced to them, then Peter. Everyone was quiet for a few minutes. Even Tony had no snarky or sarcastic comment to make. That’s a first.

“Um... hey, guys....” Peter stutters out. It just makes the tension in the room grow.

“Please tell me the rest of you guys just say Peter & y/n kiss.” Nat said.

You gave everyone a half smile and turned your head back to Peter.

“You should stay here.” He whispered, pressing his forehead to yours.

“Maybe I will.” You said, smiling like an idiot.

“He’s their lobster!” Bruce whispered, just loud enough so you & Peter could hear.

You smiled at the reference he made.

And you didn’t contradict him.

--------

THIS IS LIVE FROM NEW YORK IT’S SATURDAY NIGHT!!!

[wickedsrest-rp-archive]

Invest-eye-gation || POTW Chatzy

TIMING: Current LOCATION: In a conference room at the WC Morgue SUMMARY: The WCPD and ME’s Office are hard at work trying to analyze as many eyes as possible, and learn more about what it all means.  

It felt wrong to move the trays of eyeballs out of the autopsy suite and into the conference room, but if they were going to get as many of these finished as possible, she needed all hands on deck, and it wasn’t feasible to cram everyone in there. Regan stayed in her corner of the conference room, trying to keep her distance from everyone while slowly and methodically pulling vitreous humor from each eye, and squirting it into the tubes laid out in front of her. At least no one was urging her to take a break and go on a coffee run after she failed to return from the last one. “Test tube rack is full. Can anyone grab me a new one?” She sighed, looking over at the remaining trays full of eyes. So many of them. “Any new locations to pin on the map?”

"Mmm-St Loo" Agatha wrinkled her nose and swallowed her bite, looking over the screen of her laptop with an apologetic smile. "Sorry, St Louis. Mark Everett, went missing in October 1988," the detective picked up her coffee mug and took a long sip. She didn't know for how long this all would last, but each time she crossed out a DNA profile, it seemed like her list of profiles to check had gotten longer again.

In another circumstance, maybe it could have been nice to finally see Regan after a few days. Considering Kaden still wasn't sure if that scream was for him or not. This however, was very much work. And he wanted nothing to do with sticking needles in eyes. So database duty it was. "We got Argentina listed yet? Looks like this person went missing off the coast. Reported in November 2004."

He didn't want to be here. Why was he here. Simon handed Regan the rack she asked for, deciding that it would've been easier for him to help deal with the samples than the database files. He remained quiet, content to listen to the conversation and do whatever it was that needed to be done or marked though part of him had a mind to just... mark a big circle around the entirety of the map.

Roland had spent most of the past week at the station or morgue, going through the database and connecting the eyeballs to as many missing persons cases as he could, trying to make any connection he would. The dates spanned so far back his head was spinning. How were these all turning up and why now? "Got Huntington Beach, California. Lisa Claymore. December 1995," he answered.

Cece had kept herself busy helping collect fluid from the eyes, but had briefly taken a break from the duty to study the map. It was just coincidence that people started naming off towns and locations while she was by the map anyways, so she began adding thumbtacks onto the board, “St. Louis. Argentina. Huntington beach. These eyes have been all over the place. Really seen some things.” She grinned at her own joke, too focused on the map to force others to laugh at her joke.

Simon did, in fact, quietly chuckle at the joke.

Regan gave Simon a nod as a thank you and got back to work. It was hard to completely tune out what everyone was saying -- none of this made sense, and she couldn't reconcile the dates with the eyes in front of her. "1995." She repeated. "Yet the eyes are intact. Not a blow fly egg to be seen on them." Decomposition would be far more comforting, in this case.

Touching eyeballs was not on the agenda for today, so Marley had stuck herself on file duty. She'd been doing work similar to this, anyway, so she was used to combing through files for any sort of connection. Each time a new name was called out, she pinned it up on the board, then wrote the name and area on the list. She stuck a new tack in St. Louis, Argentina, and Huntington Beach. "Can't imagine the things they've seen," she chimed in, reaching over for her pen to write some more names down.

Kaden shook his head at Cece's joke. And of course Stryder chimed in. "And they came to White Crest of all places for final observation." He downed some more of his coffee, it was the only thing keeping him upright staring at all the numbers and charts and shit. "Shit. This case is a John Doe from 1973." He double checked the results. "Uh, can someone check I put this in right? That can't be right."

"What I wonder is, how are these things still in good shape after so many years?" There must have been a logical explanation to it, and she expected Regan to answer this question, or Cece, whose joke brought the usual ugly laugh from Agatha. "Cece !" She might have sounded like she was shocked but her laughter told another story. "Mmmmh, this one's from Bogota. He was reported missing in January 1991." Hearing Kaden's question, Agatha stood up from her seat to have a look. "Let me see." She adjusted her glasses back up her nose and looked over his shoulder, squinting at the screen. "What's the matter?"

Roland wasn't quite amused by the jokes, but didn't want to ruin morale during such a crazy time. Everyone was a little worn thin right now. Better to not aggravate anyone though the mention of 1973 got his attention. "1973? That can't be right. Let me take a look." That was nearly 50 years ago. How could they be turning up in good shape now and here of all times? He looked over Kaden's screen and confirmed everything was input correctly. "No, you got that right. That's... How is it possible for them to be turning up so many years later?"

"Lucky them," Marley said, giving Kaden a side eye as she finished writing down her new names. Dates were less important to her, but still noteworthy. "Seriously?" she asked, perking up at the new discovery. She stuck a pin in Bogota as Sarge and Agatha made their way over. She wished Jane were here, she needed someone else here to know that the explanation wasn't going to be found in this lab. Someone to exchange "that glance" with. And she needed her coffee.

There was no doubt in Kaden's mind all this shit was supernatural. Clearly. He kept hoping there'd be some sort of pattern they could see here but this was fucking weird. Even by White Crest standards. "So you're telling me a fully intact eyeball from October 19 fucking 73 was just put into evidence? Putain de merde." He sighed and looked over the file again. "There's no way these are preserved or something, right?" He looked over at Regan and then at Cece, hoping for some answers.

"These aren't typical post-mortem eyes." Regan said, studying one closely. "They're perfect. No decomp at all, even from the ones that have been outside for days. I don't -- there has to be something preserving them. Perhaps they were kept in a freezer for years, until recently. But more likely, this is the work of some compound. I intend to dig into it further."

Jane stumbled into the room with a neat stack of files under her arm and her coffee and sunglasses on her face. She had a pounding headache, her mouth felt like sandpaper, and pain and exhaustion crept into ever step she took. She was technically on leave, so she didn't even know why she was here - there was no plausible explanation anyone was going to believe anyway. Maybe it was to drive the guilt of buying drugs away, but she hadn't been this hungover since college and she knew she looked like shit. When had she gotten so old? Jane mumbled an unintelligible greeting, pointedly looking anywhere but Regan, before going to go sit and start picking through files with Marley.

The room engulfed Regan as Wu stumbled in, adorned in mismatching clothes and dropping files with each step. Wasn't she taking time off? The only reason Regan was here, and not stuffed into her office doing this work alone, was that she thought Wu would be absent. The eyeball in Regan's hands fell back onto the tray and she sank back into her seat, willing it to swallow her whole. She looked over at Simon. Then Kaden. Then Wu. Back down to the eyeballs. At least she could make eye contact with them.

Simon caught the look Regan gave him and he quirked an eyebrow in turn, his own eyes darting from the doctor to Jane; something changed when the latter stepped into the room. And she was kind enough not to bring any coffee for anyone else. His shoulders drooped... someone should've told him so he could've been anywhere else but still helping.

"Yikes," Marley mumbled as Jane stumbled in-- still looking relatively alive. She noted her aversion of Regan, glancing anywhere but her, taking the files she handed over and muttering, "so did you kill the tequila or did it kill you?" quietly, hoping only Jane would hear. She glanced back at the others, then to her board, before writing down the okayed 1973 date next to a John Doe. "Seems almost...impossible, right?" braced for the onslaughts of it's not impossible if it happened and etc. But she'd already turned away from them, filing through more papers. There had to be a connection. And she would find it.

"For real?" Hands on her hips, Agatha looked at Jane from where she stood. Late, without coffee for anyone but herself, and looking like she was in no shape to help. Perfect. She tried not to roll her eyes and glanced at the sergeant instead, expecting him to say something.

Cece abandoned her post immediately, flocking to Jane. “Word of advice? Steer clear of the eye stuff. Not as glamorous as it looks. Take the casework.”

Kaden didn't expect to see Wu show up at all. Hell, he wasn't sure he was going to show up but he sure as shit needed something to do instead of fucking panic. "Thanks for completing that coffee run. Oh wait." He caught the look Regan gave him and considered going over. No. Seemed bad to bring up any personal shit. Not with Sarge right behind him. Putain. His eyes narrowed at Stryder's comment. "Yeah. It's a little fucking weird. Like just about everything here. You can double check the fucking file if you want, though. You know. If you don't believe me," he said, crossing his arms across his chest.

Roland was surprised to see Jane walking in the room, looking like she'd been to hell and back. She was supposed to be on leave due to some emergency and she didn't look like she was in any shape to be working. He cocked a brow and asked, "What are you doing here, Wu? Aren't you supposed to be on leave?"

Regan tried to just keep her head down. Keep extracting some of that beautifully cloudy fluid from impossibly perfect post-mortem eyes. But every time she heard Wu's name, the panic in her chest tightened and her lungs started to burn. "What Bishop said!" Regan yelped, her voice sharp and screechy, just for a moment. At least the glass in the morgue was more durable now. Or... most of it, she realized with a pang of horror, as a few of the vials in front of her cracked. Regan quickly brushed them aside like it hadn't happened. No one would notice, right? "Don't help with the eyes, Wu. Do... something else. Something over there." She pointed to the opposite side of the room.

"I'm, uh..." Simon cast another quick glance at Regan, then did a head count of everyone else in the room sans Jane before flinching and covering his ears again at Regan's noise. "I'm... going to get some coffee." He finished the rest of his sentence quietly, going over and retrieving yet another set of tubes for Regan and maneuvering around everything and everyone to leave the room. "I'll be back."

Jane shot Marley a look, snorting quietly as she shook her head. What exactly had she done last night? Jane didn't remember. There was a bar, then nothing until she woke up early the next morning in someone else's apartment, where she stumbled home to feed her pet step stool French Fry before she remembered step stools didn't eat, and ended up here at work instead. About to answer Cece, Sarge cut in and she gave a half shrug. "Yes. But I'm here figuring you'd need help combing through paperwork." Regan pipped up, quite literally, and she flinched. Jane turned her head, pulling her sunglasses down over her nose to peer at her. "As much as looking at the actual eyeballs sounds riveting, Kavanagh, I'll stay here and work on the case files. Just try to keep it down. Please."

Agatha finally rolled her eyes and headed back to her laptop. Another day of unprofessionalism going unpunished, she supposed. "Maybe we could back to those eyes, perhaps?" She had pulled her hair up into a bun and stuck a pencil in to keep it up. "Carol Griffin, Canberra, went missing in November 1979," she did not look up from her screen this time, instead picking up her notepad to go to the next name. "Germaine Lacroix, Toulouse, reported missing in December 1997."

Winston was aware that they were late. But they'd been held up working through some glitches in the database that they'd been building for Roland. They had lost track of time and then several of the other interns had started pestering them with questions. Pushing their glasses up the bridge of their nose, Winston looked up at everyone and smiled tiredly. "Sorry, I know I'm really late but I got held up with other stuff. What did I miss?"

Okay, something was clearly going on between Kavanagh and Jane, but Marley wasn't sure what. It couldn't just be because Kavanagh was on Jane's ass about the werewolf thing. Marley knew Jane's normal annoyed behavior, and this went beyond that. She'd have to bother her later, though, because as she pinned up a few more locations from the file, she noticed a pattern, finally. "Hey, Sarge," she waved, "check this out." Pointed to the map, filled with plenty of tacks now, and all of them around large bodies of water. "It looks like almost every case is around a lake or near the ocean. Or some sort of water. That's gotta be something. We should check in to activity around the lakes at the times some of these people went missing. I bet we'll find something interesting." Like, cultists activity, perhaps?

Dahlia didn't really have a good excuse for being late. It had taken her longer then expected to get her notes together. She had to come prepared. It was her job role it was just as important to keep the supernatural truth from those she worked with you remained in the dark. She slipped in, and just in time it seemed. "Speaking as someone who understands people it makes sense that whoever did this had a preferred hunting ground."

Kaden winced at the slight screech from Regan and braced himself for any breaking glass. Nothing, just a few vials. Still, he shot a look at Wu. Keep it down? Fucking really? Sure she might be dying soon but she'd come fucking back. Unlike him. Well, so long as he didn't have to kill her, that was up in the air for the moment. He went back to the database and plugged away at another result. "Ethan Drummond. Portland, Oregon, reported October 2012. So far your shit checks out, Stryder."

The second Dahlia entered the room, it felt like bugs were biting into Regan's flesh. She jolted uncomfortably, glad that Simon had momentarily left and couldn't press her on it. Between Wu and Dahlia and the risk of breaking more glassware when they really needed every last piece they could get, Regan wasn't sure this was the best idea. But Stryder's comment gave her pause. "I think you're right. I mean, based on the map, I know you are." She considered. "Do you think the cultists wanted their eyes?"

Roland didn't want to push Jane any further in front of everyone else. Her arriving out of sorts could be addressed later. He understood the need to work through a crisis, but perhaps a group setting wasn't the best idea. He ignored it and plugged away at the database, when Stryder called him over. He looked over the map and every pin was near some body of water. "Strange," he mused, "That does seem like it could be cultist, taking eyes near a body of water. Can't say I've ever heard of anything like it though." There had to be some other connection in the database. Were these happening around a certain time? What were the ages of the individuals? These were connections that needed to be made. "Good eye," he told Marley, grimacing as he realized his wording may not have been entirely appropriate.

"It's within reason for that to be assumed," Marley said, rubbing her chin as she examined the map, blocking out the useless chatter. "We've seen other radical behaviors from cults, though collecting human body parts has never really been one. Cults usually have more of a set of goals and rules, though it's not unheard of a cult leader to convince their subjects to do things they'd never consider themselves." She stuck another pin in when Keen piped up, but did not take her eyes from the map. "What's the database looking like, Keen?" she asked, finally turning away.

"It could be a cult," Agatha stood up from her chair once again, this time heading to where Marley stood. "You said that it's connected to the water," she held a finger up, checking the dates on Marley's pins. It couldn't be a coincidence. All these people, they had been reported missing either in October, November, December or January. No one in the spring or summer. "Okay, so. The years don't check out, but all these people disappeared somewhere between October and January. We all know how sometimes things are reported way too late," she trailed off. "Maybe we could narrow it down a bit. I think it's safe to assume, considering how little of them were reported in January, that they all disappeared in the last third of the year."

"Not that unlikely though, not if the eyes were part of a ritual, or something to show alligiance to the leader," Dahlia chimed in. A cult would be a good cover regardless of whether it was the truth or not. "I've studied and written about them before, I can find my old notes." She began pulling out her laptop, letting then carry on talking about all things detective.

Kaden continued to work away at the database while the detectives chatted. His brow furrowed when the results came up. "This one's recent." It was right around when he came to White Crest. "Last seen date was October 2, 2019. Shit." He felt a pit drop in his stomach. "Officer Kim McPhee. Last seen headed towards the Drop Off. On an animal control assignment." Kaden stared at the file. This was who he replaced. She was-- He could be next. Just as quickly. He was going to be sick. It was easier to have distance with the other names that came up. The ones from years ago. Suddenly it felt very real.

Simon slipped in almost as easily as he left in the first place, carrying two large bags rather easily all things considered and muttered an apology, presumably for the noise he made temporarily as he pulled out several drink carriers of coffee and managed to find places for each of them on the tables for people to reach - and he made sure he got enough for everyone to have at least one. He folded up the bags neatly, apologising again and he awkwardly made his way back over near Regan's desk, crossing is arms as he leaned against the wall and picked up where he left off to observe the rest of the team's findings - looked like they got a lead.

Marley shot a look at Dahlia. "I'm well aware of what cult leaders can influence their subjects to do. I did study human behavior, after all," she said, "lengthily." She turned to focus back on the dates with Agatha. "That's good. Maybe narrow it down somehow? Can we cross check reports to see how long people were missing before they were reported?"

Eventually, Cece found her way back to her original job. Collecting samples from the eyes. For whatever reason, Regan seemed to have beef with Jane. Which was probably the most interesting development at this shindig. Collecting the fluids felt like a waste of time anyways. At this point, it was pretty obvious that this was supernatural. Cece could run every test available on every single eye they had collected and they still probably wouldn’t find anything. It seemed obvious which people here still didn’t want to believe in the supernatural and which had resigned themselves to that fact already. But at least the cult talk was some sort of middle ground for the group. “It’s a lot of eyes. A cult could explain how so many eyes got here. Not like cults need any logical reason for the crazy shit they do.”

Actually, a cult wasn't that outlandish by any means. "People could have be being sacrificed between October and January to... whatever it is they believe. That makes sense. How all their eyes ended up here, however..." Jane mused, considering a moment. Her gaze snapped to Kaden, though, brows knitting together when he mentioned the animal control officer that went missing last October. Considering recent screaming circumstances, it probably wasn't a good thing to think about. Her head was pounding, and she just shook her head. "I'll start cross referencing reported dates to when the victims were last seen," Jane said, leaning forward to pull a stack of files towards her.

"I can run all of these reports through various pattern recognition algorithms and see if there is any combination of dates, locations, demographics, age, gender, socio-economic background, we can really narrow everything down if you can give me the specific information on it." As Winston spoke they tapped away at their laptop. "The more information that we can get on the database the easier it will be to develop some level of correlational analysis."

The last animal control officer went missing. That information chilled her marrow, and Regan looked over at Kaden. It was rare that he looked so shaken, and she wanted to help, but that seemed like a poor idea given everyone else in the room with them right now, and the professional setting. Still... "Kaden." Regan said, taking a very short break from the tray of eyes in front of her. "We're going to prevent this from happening to others." They had to, right? What else were they good for if they couldn't protect? "There are far too many eyes here for one individual to be responsible, and that's ignoring the -- well --" the motioned over toward the map, stuffed full of pins. "A cult makes sense. Bishop, I'd like the two of us to proceed with testing the eyes for any uncommon drug presence. I know we ran the standard tox panels, but I'd like some ELISAs run for preservatives. Substances not usually found in decedents."

Roland gave Winston an approving look as he walked back over to his own laptop. A cult or some other sort of group made the most sense with the sheer volume of eyes they had to go through. Either way, there was a pattern there with the time of year that he wasn't surprised Keen had picked up on. "Good catch, Keen. Here are some to start inputting, Winston." He pushed his own stack of finished files with his updated notes over to them.

Agatha looked from the pinboard to Jane, arms crossed over her chest. Her stance relaxed as the detective agreed with her, although, just like her, she reacted to Kaden's words. She had known Kim, and her going missing had shaken up the station quite a lot back then. Agatha went back to her seat and shot Winston a small smile as she did. Considering what had just been said, she didn't feel too cheerful. "You can add those to the Sergeant's," she told them, sliding her stack across the table, with a chocolate donut on top. "I'll help you with that, Jane," she too went to grab a stack of files and before starting to get to worked, she mouthed at her a "Are you ok?" She might not have been too happy with her earlier, she could tell something was off.

Jane started flipping through files and reports, nodding at Agatha as she joined her. She saw her attempt to checking, and Jane almost laughed outright - not because Keen had said something funny by any means, but because it was just funny that Jane had even bothered to show up. She made a note on her computer, before glancing back at Agatha. "Well, I'm still alive, so." Jane replied in a low voice, chuckling humorlessly to herself as started combing over another file.

Kaden thought about getting up and leaving. To do... what, exactly? Fuck. The last thing he wanted to do was collect the fluids from the eyeballs, wondering what sort of connections he may or may not have to any of those while looking at them. But he couldn't take the result off of his screen just yet. He looked up at Regan and all he could manage was a nod. "Yeah. Well. That's the plan, at least." No single police unit or hell, any police unit was going to be able to figure out shit about whatever supernatural crap was going on here. Let alone prevent it. So hardly a comforting thought. "The cultists on the beach and the lake, they all seem to have their eyes sewn shut. You think these belong to any of them maybe? Like they ran away from home, gouged out their own eyes or something?" It sure sounded crazy but with the supernatural involved, likely not the craziest way to lose an eyeball.

Winston set to work with the new information that Roland had provided them with. They were apprehensive about the WCPD becoming heavily embroiled with anything related to the cult. After all they had already demonstrated that they were willing and capable to hurt others if it suited them. Winston just hoped that whatever they had done with all of these people wasn't too heavily supernatural. After all, there were plenty of officers that weren't going to be able to play nicely with that. "Thanks Agatha," Winston replied taking the doughnut appreciatively and typing as quick as they could, "there have been reports that the cult is operating out of the lake, but do we know if there is any leads as to where they have their headquarters set up?"

The janitor part of Simon was acting up, despite everything else that was going on around him with their findings of cults and eyes and dates and stuff - so he did what he would've done anyway and picked up some MORE glass that Regan broke. As he moved over to collect the broken vial on her desk, noting her break to address Kaden and reached over the trey of eyes, one of them vibrated before lifting and clinging to his hand as if the two were magnetized. Well, this was new. Doing his best to not freak out about it, he subtly placed his fingers around the eye and attempted to pull it off but as he applied pressure, something flashed before his eyes. A big flash, a sign - the White Crest sign, sitting there before exploding in a dazzle of... magic? He had only seen magic utilized a few times before this point but never like this. The sign splintered, crackling like electricity and he flinched away from it as a shard of wood propelled itself towards him, holding his hands up to shield his face from it like it was actually happening and backing into the wall roughly.

Regan wanted to tell Simon to forget about the broken glass, she'd get it later, but before she could say anything, one of the eyeballs seemed to propel itself toward Simon's hand. It slithered around before settling itself into his flesh, and Regan jumped up from her seat, a screech forming in her lungs and emptying from her throat in a split second. The rest of the tubes in front of her shattered but, more importantly, Simon was writhing around, trying to yank the eye from his hand, but it was like it was glued on there, and for a moment, his eyes flipped in and out of focus like he was elsewhere. Backed himself into the wall covered in sweat. Regan bounded toward him, less concerned about helping him up than she was about carefully extricating the eye from his hand in one piece. She gave it a tug, and it popped off, though part of her thought it might not have been anything she had done. Regan gave it a close inspection before plopping it back onto the tray. Blinked at the eye, the broken glass, and Simon. Then looked around the room. This was fine. None of that just happened. More hallucinations. "Um, did you trip? Over something?"

Cece nodded at Regan. Just as expected. She would run the tests. Most likely, nothing would come back from it, but why the hell not? Better to just run the tests like the Doc instructed. She was working on another eye when she noticed the eye attach itself to Simon. Cece’s head tilted curiously, watching the scene as it seemed be absorbed into Simon’s skin. She stood back, examining it silently until Simon started moving around. What the hell was that? She moved closer to him, mumbling under her breath so maybe only he and Regan, who seemed to have noticed the moment too, could hear. “You alright dude? What… just happened?”

As Winston watched Simon's eye pulled from his hand, even though it wasn't actually his eye, Winston couldn't help but feel a shiver run down their spine. The eye in their own hand itched and Winston looked from Cece to Regan to Simon and then down to their own hand. Pulling the sleeve of their hoodie over their hand. "Woah, what happened?" they said as they tried to act like they couldn't put it all together, "There's broken glass we should probably try and clean that up and did something happen with that ... eye?"

Simon hadn't quite recovered from what he saw when suddenly Regan screamed again and he whimpered this time, breathing quickly as his other hand covered the ear it could reach. Though he was far from surprised and not paying all that much attention, Regan seemed more focused on the eye than him. Once it was off, he pulled the hand that the eye stuck to close to his body, shaking his head erratically as if trying to get rid of the scream that made his ears ring. "I-I don't know," He murmured to Cece, managing to hear her question though the noise. "There was-- the uh... White Crest sign and it- it blew up." He stuttered. "I don't-- it was there and then-then it... wasn't."

Everything happened before Marley could get a grip on anything. Her hands immediately went up to her ears as the scream shattered the glass vials in front of Regan. Whatever had happened to the weird janitor dude, which, why was he here, anyway? Wasn't this police work? Not that Marley cared, really. Everyone was gathering around him now, but something struck a chord in Marley's brain, her mind churning. A banshee had screamed for Jane. Jane was mad at Regan. Regan had just screamed at an ungodly decibel. The only conclusion-- Regan was the banshee that had screamed for Jane. Fuck how had she not noticed? She turned back to look at Jane, one brow raised. "Twice in one week," she muttered to her, "hopefully you don't lose your hearing before you die..." and pinned another tack on the board in white crest. For Kim McPhee.

"... Dude, what the hell," Agatha her fingers rubbing her ear, looked at Regan from over her glasses with an eyebrow raised. What was going on over there? Did ... Simon pick up an eye? Was he stealing an eye? Whatever had happened, it seemed like the medical examiner was handling it, but clearly, screeching like this was not necessary. "You should go get some fresh air, Doctor," she observed, going back to her computer, trying to ignore the ringing in her ears. "So... I already have 4 people who stopped being seen in October," looking up from her notepad, she glanced over at Jane. "What do you have?"

Kaden almost missed the fact that Simon was having some kind of issue because all he heard was another fucking scream and his hands shot to his ears while he let out a few choice curse words in couple languages. What a great fucking time to have sensitive hearing. It was nowhere near as bad as Brimm Stonne Court but putain. He looked back to see what the fuck had happened, rubbing his ears a bit as if it could dull the ringing. "The fuck was that?" He considered getting a dig in but it seemed like a bad fucking idea with Regan and Hills in the room. Not worth it. His eyes narrowed as he described the sign. "You saw something?" But he was a werewolf. Those didn't get visions. Couldn't be for that. He crossed the room to Cece. "Might want to check that one for more than just fluids," he whispered to her, hoping she caught the potential connection, too. The potential magical one. "Seems like it might have belonged to someone unusual."

Fresh air. Right. That hadn't been a hallucination, had it? Regan didn't make eye contact with anyone as she peeled out of the room. Wait. They were in the morgue. Her morgue. She backed up. "Bishop. You're in charge." She darted out of the conference room again and ran down the hall for her office to catch her breath, to will the panic to subside and her lungs to stop feeling so tight. And, if it were even possible, to stop the image of trays full of eyeballs from burning into her retinas.

Jane let out a loud curse as Regan screamed again, hands clamping over her ears. "What did I just say?!" She hissed. At least it was less catastrophic than the last time. Her ears ringing again for just a moment, she shook her head, the pounding in her head getting worse as people flocked around Simon. Something had happening, but she had missed it while her nose was in her files. Regan and Cece and everyone else that wasn't her was handling it. Good. She glanced to Agatha, brows knitting together. "Mine stopped being seen in October too," Jane replied. She pinched the bridge of her nose. Goddamn it. Whatever this was, supernatural or not, screaming banshees or not. "This," she mumbled to herself, "Is the bad place."

[duker42]

*****WARNING*****NSFW/THREAT OF RAPE/TRIGGERING CONTENT

💜Lose/Lose💜

He struggled against the straps holding him down. He cursed and shouted at the man but all he got was a wicked grin in return and a bawdy laugh.

Levi had gotten them into a mess and he didn’t know how he was going to get them out. He had been hit from behind and knocked unconscious by Kenny when he had been flying toward the squad to warn them to let Historia and Eren go. He didn’t know how Y/N got there when he woke up in the abandoned farmhouse where he was tied up.

“Look at this girl, Levi....How did you manage to get such a looker?” Kenny said as he taunted Y/N with the edge of his blade. He held Levi’s squad member by the chin, his arm wrapped around her as he ran the knife up and down her body, toying with her.

He seemed to enjoy her muffled shouts around the gag in her mouth. Thrilled at seeing her freeze when he pressed the blade beneath her eyeball. He was a sick and twisted fuck, Levi should know from the years he spent living with him in the underground.

“Kenny, let her go, you have me.” Levi growled, glaring at the man he had learned how to wield a knife from. That same knife was threatening Y/N.

“Why would I want to do that? Especially since the bitch chased after me and cut me to try and save your tiny ass.” Kenny asked, looking over at Levi.

“So runt, this your girlfriend?” Levi glared at him as he shook his head. He couldn’t let Kenny think there was an ounce of feelings for the girl, or she would be used against him.

“How about you, pretty thing? You like runts?” He coos at Y/N.

Her muffled “FUCK YOU” was clearly understood, even with the cloth in her mouth.

Kenny laughed, the sound wicked as it made a flash of fear curl in Levi’s gut. That laugh could mean nothing good.

“Feisty! I like you! I think we could have a lot of fun. What do you think, darlin’?” Her eyes were hot and angry as she stared into his cold and calculating blue orbs.

Kenny sliced her top off and started to press the blade to the edge of her throat when she started to struggle. “Hold on girl, I know you’re eager.” He cackled as Levi shouted at him to leave her alone.

She stood still and stared helplessly at the Captain as Kenny cut her clothes off. When she was naked, he didn’t look down, but kept his eyes trained on hers.

“Hot damn boy! Look at that ass!” He turned her around and Levi saw her perfect round ass before Kenny slapped it.

“God damnit Kenny! DON’T TOUCH HER!” Levi shouted as he pulled against the thick leather. Damn the man for using the tough ODM straps to bind his hands.

“Hmmmm so you do like her.” Kenny mused turning Y/N back around to face her Captain. He watched as Levi’s eyes widened and narrowed in hatred as he slid the edge of his knife over her breasts and down her stomach. He could swear he was hearing a growl come from the runt.

Y/N tried to stay still as the blade of his knife traveled over her skin, wincing when it made shallow cuts because of her jerking away. “How about you, girlie? You dream about taking your Captain’s cock?” She shuddered in disgust as his hot breath washed over her ear.

“She’s not bad, boy. I’m feeling a bit randy from seeing her like this. How about I bend her over and see if I can make her squeal?” Kenny asked running a hand up to cup her breast.

“Fuck! Keep your filthy hands off her you fucking crazy bastard. Just go ahead and kill me. Let her go.” Levi said, his words hard but his mind racing in horror. He needed to find a way out of this. Needed to save Y/N from that fate.

“Ahhhhh, I see.” Kenny’s eyes narrowed on Levi. “You haven’t had her yourself yet, have you?”

He drew the knife back up to where it was pointed at her jugular and pushed her forward. She gasped around the gag as she tried to keep herself from falling onto his obscenely sharp knife.

“Grab his cock, girl.” Kenny ordered. Y/N looked at him and he motioned her to get started. Her eyes met Levi’s in embarrassment as she felt his crotch and grabbed his cock, hard and straining against the buttons.

“Well looky there. The little runt likes the naked girl.” Kenny laughed as he scratched his chin. “Soooooo what to do?”

“What the fuck are you talking about old man. Everyone gets a boner from a naked girl.” Levi spit out, desperate to get his mind off this train of thought.

“Yeah.....but I’m thinking you really want to put that cock of yours in your soldier.” Kenny said conversationally. “So let’s see, I could fuck your precious girl here and let you watch, then watch as each one of my men have a turn with her.” Y/N started struggling and screaming obscenities against the gag as Levi pulled against the straps and hurled abuse at their captor.

“Or....OR.” Kenny held the knife up to her eyeball again. “Damn let a man finish before you go choosing. Or....I untie you and I get to watch you fuck your girl. Decisions, decision.”

He turned to Y/N and looked her in the eye “Well girl, what’s it going to be?”

He removed the gag and Y/N shot back “Fuck yourself old man!”

He laughed and turned to Levi. “Looks like she chooses you, boy!”

~~~~~

For his own sick amusement, Kenny traded his knife for his Anti personnel guns. Easier to keep them in line, he said. Levi wouldn’t have risked Y/N, the older man’s gun pointed directly at her head.

He had already seen what it had done to Nifa, he didn’t want to see the image of Y/N like that. He had been released, his hands untied and ordered to strip down by Kenny with ruthless glee.

He had burned with hatred as he took off the last of his clothes. Embarrassed because of the situation and the reaction of his body to Y/N’s lithe form.

“We don’t have time for the full shebang, so how about you two just get to fucking.” Kenny ordered as he lounged in the chair where Levi had been tied up.

“Where on the fucking floor?” Levi argued, trying to buy time to figure a way out without getting their asses shot.

“Take her against the wall or just bend her over brat. You act like you haven’t gotten laid.” Kenny grumped, annoyed at the back talk.

“I prefer to fuck without a gun at my back, asshole.” Levi retorted earning a snicker from Kenny.

He had turned to Y/N and wordless apologized as he lifted her into his arms. There was no way they were getting out of this lose/lose situation. Either he was forced to have sex with Y/N or Kenny and fuck only knows how many others would take her. He cared about her too much to see that happen.

“Y/N....I’m sorry.” Levi said as he felt her wrap her arms around him.

“It’s okay...just gut him the first chance you get.” Y/N whispered as he slowly lowered her down onto his shaft.

She wasn’t a virgin and neither was he, but they had never had sex before. Never thought about violating that boundary. As they both groaned as the feeling of the other, Y/N wondered if this wasn’t opening a rabbit hole.

He used his strength to hold her up, refusing to put them on anything filthy in this farmhouse. She wrapped her legs around him and blocked out the commentary from the Captain of the Anti Personnel Squad as she started using her thighs to move up and down on his cock.

Levi’s hands were holding her ass, gripping it as he lifted and lowered her, rocking his heels as he lifted his own hips up into her.

“Holy fuck runt. I think you might have actually fucked someone before.” Kenny drawled.

“Shut the fuck up, Kenny.” Levi gritted his teeth as he spit the words out.

Y/N leaned down and kissed him, surprising him as she rolled her hips around and squeezed him with her tight walls. He felt himself flex in response and push her down a bit harder on his cock.

“The window.” Y/N breathed casually in between the thrusts of his cock into her pussy. “We can make it if you push me against the wall.”

He threw his head back and looked at the far window. “Glass” he said right before he latched on to her neck with his lips.

“Going to have to chance it.” Y/N said.

“Stop whispering over there! It’s bad manners!” Kenny glowered. They both turned and glared at him.

“Ohhh fuck.....Levi....fuck me against the wall.” Y/N threw her head back and moaned as Levi ran the kisses down her throat. He pressed his tongue against a shallow cut Kenny had inflicted and licked it gently.

“Now you guys are getting into it!” Kenny hollered as Levi walked backwards towards the window.

“Yes! Levi....NOW!” She cried, tucking her head into his chest.

Levi took two running steps and threw himself backwards through the window, still firmly imbedded in Y/N. The glass shattered and they fell to the ground and breaking apart, hearing the outraged cry of Kenny and the thump of his boots as he got up to run after them.

“Y/N, Run!” Levi jumped up and grabbed her hand to make a run for it when they heard a loud crash from the front of the house and shots being fired.

Y/N recognized the voices of their squad and Hanji as they ran around the back. An MP came flying out the back door straight into the waiting fist of a very angry naked Captain. When he had knocked the man out, he tossed the cape to Y/N to cover herself and waited to see if there was going to be another visitor.

Y/N started stripping the straps and uniform off the man. She handed Levi a pair of pants and he pulled them on just as another victim came out the back trying to escape. Levi had quickly dispatched him as well, guarding Y/N as she procured clothes for herself. When they were decent, they ventured into the house to find his squad rounding up the members of Kenny’s squad, their leader on his knees in front of all of them.

“Well, shit....” Kenny muttered as he looked into the very angry face of a shirtless and shoeless Captain Levi.

The rest of the squad eyed Levi and Y/N curiously but decided not to question them considering the rage etched into the Captains face.

When they were hauling the prisoners out to the wagons to transport them to a safe place to interrogate them, Levi caught Y/N by the arm and held her back.

His eyes didn’t meet hers as he struggled to find the words to say. Y/N took pity on him and caught his attention by placing a hand on his warm bare chest.

“It was a lose/lose situation Levi. Although I have to say is....” She waited until he looked at her and she grinned at him. “You owe me an orgasm.”

Levi’s eyes flashed dangerously as he smirked at her words. He could handle that, as long as they didn’t have an audience this time.

Mobile MasterList

[spencerreidsthings]

Dorm Room Drama

Masterlist

    Here is another series for you all! Very different from Serial Killer Spencer. I’m thinking 3rd or 4th season Spencer, but you can go with whichever season you love most. Let me know what you think and if you wanna see the next part. 

Description: Cassie and Spencer have only been dating for a little bit, but are brought closer together through the investigation of murders that occur on the local college campus. It’s a struggle to keep their relationship on the DL when she is such a vital part of the investigation.

  Cassie had met Spencer when he gave a guest lecture in her communications class. They hit it off pretty quickly after that. She saw him after his lecture trying to find someplace to sit in the lunchroom and offered a chair. They talked for two hours before he had to get back to work. Spencer Reid is the smartest man she’s met, and she was fascinated. Especially considering how young he is and it showed when they texted or were alone. His guard came down around her.

It was a Wednesday, which meant that her morning class was communications and since his paperwork was done he was rapidly texting her statistics because he missed her. He continued to text her communication statistics until they abruptly stopped which let her know that they had a case. Communications had ended and she had three hours until her next class and after talking to Spencer through the night she planned to take a nice nap.

She was just about to crawl into bed when there was a firm knock on the door. It seemed urgent so she answered it without putting on pants figuring it was one of the girls on the floor. It was surprising to see Spencer his team standing on the other side of the door.

            “Hi…” She hesitated

            “Hi, I’m agent Hotchner, this is agent Morgan and Prentiss. Forensic analyst Garcia and Dr. Reid. We are with the behavioral analysis unit at the FBI, can we come it?”

            They stepped past her and spencer eyeballed her as he came through the door. She raised her eyebrows, but he just shook his head. “There have been killings happening on this campus, are you aware of this?” Hotch asked with zero emotion. The team was setting their things up and looking through the windows.

            “Well yeah. I lost my roommates to the killer.”

            “Is that why your room is so big?” Prentiss asked moving to stand next to her.

            “Yeah. The is a triple room and university is letting me stay the rest of the year without paying or new roommates because they don’t want me to sue.” Reid stopped moving and stared at Cassie with an unreadable expression.

            “Why didn’t the killer kill you? Why just your roommates?” Hotch abruptly asked Cassie much to the shock of everyone in the room.

            “Excuse me?” Cassie Sassed, “How could you ask me that?”

            “It’s a simple question. Why didn’t the killer wait the extra ten minutes for you to arrive home and kill all three of you? Why did you get away unharmed?” He raised his voice through the statement.

            “Hotch, enough. Leave the girl alone.” Prentiss came to her rescue and took her aside. “We’re going to need to ask you some questions, but first we need to set up base here. Your dorm is a crime scene but also overlooks his usual killing spot. The university okayed it and are willing to give you another room for the time being, but you’re more than welcome to stay as well.”

            They had gotten their equipment set up while Morgan and Hotch lofted the other beds. Cassie hung her hammocks underneath for extra sleeping room. “We really appreciate you opening up your space to us. And if you need anything just let up know.” Prentiss told Cassie.

            “Yeah, same to you” The girl replied reluctantly.

            “Reid said he gave a guest lecture in your class 2 months ago,” Morgan stated his question

            “Yeah, interpersonal communications. It was a great lecture. He told us how to tell when someone is hiding something. He used some cocky asshole as an example. He was actually arrested for non-consensual sex.” Cassie roamed the room while talking. She seemed to be gathering an abundance of books and folders. “So, I have two extra desks and bookshelves. Fight among yourselves for those. The rest of you will have to work on the floor.” She was trying to be a good host despite the situation and didn’t really mind opening up her space to them. They watched her fly around the room gathering things. First, her backpack, then back for water, then again for gum. In the midst of all her running around, she paused in the middle of the room and looked at the bare beds. “I have sheets” she announced and grabbed her desk chair. Spencer stiffened when she climbed onto the spinning chair. He was certain she would fall. Morgan noticed the change in behavior but didn’t mention it.

            Once the sheets were thrown in piles on the beds and blankets on the floor next to the hammocks, Cassie sat at her desk to work. Garcia took one of the empty ones next to her to set up her plethora of electronics and Spencer sat on top of the other one. He crossed his legs and spread out enough to be in Cassie’s personal space. They looked at each other. The fear Cassie was feeling melted away. Fear of the killer. Fear of the team finding them out. He took away the fear, but he was still worried. It wouldn’t be the end of the world if they found out, but it still wouldn’t be good. Especially given that she’s a witness on the case.

            “Alright, Cassie. We need to ask you some questions. Is that okay?” Hotch asked approaching her desk.

            She raised her eyebrows and looked at the man with big eyes. “Right now?” She asked quietly “I kind of have homework.”

            “You think your homework is more important than this case?” Hotch asked

            “Well, no… but, I uh… my class is in two hours and I haven’t done the homework” The girl stuttered and tried to shrink her body down.

            “god, Hotch, leave her alone” Spencer defended. The whole team looked over and observed. Reid was having a staredown with Hotch and Cassie couldn’t take her eyes off Reid.

            “Oh, shit.” She mumbled looking at her watch. “I didn’t realize the time. I’m gonna be late for class.” The girl was out of the room before anyone could question her previous statement about time. She left holding her shoes in one hand and her jacket in the other.

            “Why are you being just a hardass?” Reid accused

            “Excuse me?”

            “She doesn’t have a class for two hours. She left to get away from you.” Reid spoke without getting up from his position. He didn’t feel as though Hotch deserved the extra effort. He was steaming with irritation at the way Cassie was being treated and wanted nothing more than to make it better.

            “How do you know that?” Someone asked him and he sighed

            “Her interpersonal communications class met today until 11:35. Her next class doesn’t start till 3:30.” Reid spoke with an unwavering voice thinking about the long lunch the two of them had when they met.

            “How do you know that, Reid?” Morgan asked

            “After I gave the lecture in her class, I went to eat lunch and she let me sit with her. We talked for three hours and I helped her study for her communications test. When I realized that I had to get back I apologized for taking so much of her time and she said it wasn’t a big deal because her class didn’t start until 3:30” Reid continued to talk dismissively while looking over the case file. He was subconsciously trying to draw attention away from him and the Cassie situation, but only making it worse.

            “You talked with the prime witness on this case and didn’t think to tell anyone?” Prentiss accused finally drawing Spencer’s eyes away from the file.

            “I didn’t think it was necessary, we only talked about communications.” Spencer lied easily. He wasn’t going to tell them that they talked about school, life, love, their favorite everything. They talked about everything and he fell in love with her.

            “Didn’t think it was necessary!” Prentiss exclaimed. “Reid, that is totally breaking protocol. You know that.”

            “Seriously, Reid. Why didn’t you tell us?” Morgan tacked his question right after Prentiss. The two agents unknowing making him feel attacked. 

            “I don’t know. I didn’t think it was necessary. We only just got the case, and it wasn’t active when we met. It’s not a big deal and I’m not breaking her trust” Reid was standing now and overly irritated. Out of everything he and Cassie talked about he distinctly remembered that she takes trust seriously. He wasn’t going to break it because he wanted this relationship to last.

            “ Reid, I understand the trust issue, but we need to know everything you two talked about. You never know what might be crucial to the case.” Hotch demanded to make him seem even more like a hardass. Spencer was becoming exasperated and was worried about blowing up in front of the team.

“I’m going to take a walk. I’ll be right back.” He mumbled and walked out the door in a similar fashion as Cassie did only a few minutes before. And he was headed to the exact same place. He found her lying on the couch in the lounge with her eyes closed. He knew she would be here sleeping because she stresses that her afternoon nap was vital to her day. She was curled into herself with her jacket over her lower body. She was already asleep, so he just snuck next to her on the couch and held her close. “I’m sorry, Cassie.” He whispered to the sleeping girl and let his head fall to the pillow and he soon fell asleep. The pair slept for an hour and a half before her phone alarm woke them both up. She turned it off, realized that she was in Spencer’s arms, and cuddled back into them.

[komarto]

“Welcome to the Shadow Records!” (1/2)

I might have went overboard and wrote a fic to intro my OCs to the Hazbin Universe... with a spice of a reader insert! You can also find it on AO3

Summary: After falling into hell, you hired the I.M.P.s to take out your abusive ex. But they can’t seem to find him in the living world, so you have to visit the local information broker for their whereabouts.

Words: 2374

Tws: Implied/ referenced abusive and manipulative relationship, Implied/ referenced suicide

Luna: “Blitz!”

Blitzo: “Yes Luna?”

Luna: “Yeah, dispatch just came back and they can’t find the target.”

Blitzo: “What do you mean they can’t find the target?”

Luna: “They can’t find them in the living world.”

Blitzo: “Well, if they’re not in the living world, then it’ll mean they’re dead. And with all the shit that the customer says that they’ve done to them, very terrible by the way, they would most likely end up here in hell. And frankly, that’s not our job. Hell’s too big to find and kill 1 person.”

Millie: “So what now? We can’t just tell them that we couldn’t find their target, sir...”

Moxie: “What if we asked the Shadow demon, sir?”

Blitzo: “The who?”

Moxie: “Y’know, the Shadow demon that hunted down 25 demons in a month a few years back and killed them with the Radio demon?”

Blitzo: “They gave them a lame title now? Man, the people here really needs to brush up on their naming game.”

Moxie: “She’s an information broker now, has a little collection of something on everyone in hell.”

Blitzo: “And you know that how?”

Moxie: “I… might have asked her about some stuff.”

Blitzo: “Riiiight, sure. Totally not suspicious at all. Well you can give her a call or something and see what happens.”

“This is the Shadow Records, what can we do for ya?”

Moxie: “Ah- hello, um, Shadow demon, this is uh Moxie calling in from the Immediate Murder Professionals.”

“Moxie, how nice of you to call in. And please, call me Deni. This isn’t the first time we talked and you’re a nice guy. So, are the I.M.P.s having some trouble with a client?”

Moxie: “You could say that. Our dispatch team can’t find their target, so we figured that they’re already here.”

“And you need my help to find them.”

Moxie: “Y-yes. Can you?”

“Oh sure, but you know my pricing, Moxie. It’s either money, a favour, or something that I don’t know.”

Moxie: “Well... we can have client owe you?”

“Fair enough. What’s their name?”

Moxie gives the broker your name.

“I’ve heard of them here and there. I’ll have Amelie send an eye over to get them. Have the client there in 3 hours.”

Moxie: “Of course, mam’, thank you so much for this.”

“No problem, Moxie. Just a little reminder of the favour you owe me. I’ll see them soon.”

Moxie: “Yeah, I know, thanks for that… bye bye.”

Blitzo: “What’d she say?”

Moxie: “She said to have the client be here so she can send an… eye to get her?”

Blitzo: “The fuck she going to do with an eye?”

Moxie: “I don’t know! Just call the person over and it’ll get them in 3 hours!”

Blitzo: “Fine! Luna call the client over!”

(Y/N)’s POV

It’s been a few days since you’ve contacted the I.M.P.s about your request to kill your abusive ex that landed you here. In your last moments, you prayed that the Lord would forgive the sins they made you commit as you stepped off the ledge.

You guess not. It was a rather rude awakening when you found yourself in hell. You’ve only recently found the Immediate Murder Professionals from their ad, and heck, you wanted your ex to pay for what they did, what they made you do in your cursed life. Your entire life was a fuck fest of issues and bad memories from everyone around you. Your abusive parents, manipulative and controlling ex, dead-end jobs, etc...

You did your best, you really tried. But it all came to a point where you were just too tired of trying… You just hoped that karma would finally be on your side and burn everyone that has ever wronged you.

You got a call back from them telling you to be at their headquarters in 3 hours. Had they done the job? That was fast. Nevertheless, you were eager to be there on time, maybe reach there a few minutes earlier.

You reached the door to their office 15 minutes before the meeting time. You knocked on the door and the tall imp demon greeted you. “Ah (Y/N), come in come in, here take a seat and Moxie will explain everything.”

“Hey! Wha-” the shorter employee looked at him shock. “Aren’t you suppose to explain the circumstances first?”

“It was your stupid idea! Frankly, we could have just told them the problem and go on our merry way! Now go do your fucking job.” Blitzo waved at him and walked out of the room.

Your mind is filled with question. What problem? What stupid idea have they thought of and why does it concern you?

“Hey, its gonna be alright dear just listen for a minute.” Mille pats you on your shoulder and joins Moxie at his side

Moxie clears his throat. “Well, first of all, thank you for making your way here on such a short notice, I know it can be quite hard to get here for some people. Ah um, secondly, our dispatch team ran into some complications in the living world and uh, they couldn’t find the person that you wanted us to murder. Which means that they’re here in hell, which would make it very hard to find them.”

“But! But, ah, we have a solution! There’s an information broker that I know of that can help. It’s just that well…”

“Well?” you asked sceptically.

“You have to pay for their services.”

“What? I don’t have the money to pay someone else to do the job! That’s what I paid you guys to do!”

“Yes, we know! But! There are other ways to pay them, like owing them a favour or like telling them like something that they don’t know, y’know with the whole information broker deal thing. It's practically free.” Moxie explained.

“Not when I owe some creep a favour, god knows what they’ll want from me!” you snapped back at him. A muffled tapping sound could be heard from the window but you were too worked up to care about whatever it is.

“It’s probably bad to talk about the shadow demon like that…” Millie murmured as he looked shyly to the side.

Your eyes widened at her and your head whipped back to Moxie “The SHADOW DEMON? THAT’S WHO I’M SUPPOSE TO MEET?” you exclaimed.

That’s it, you’re dead. You’ve heard rumours of the Shadow demon. But in just a month or so in hell, they had teamed up with the Radio demon, a feat on its own, and had killed 20 over demons.

Wrapped them up in little bows and strung them on the overlord’s radio tower to be picked off painfully by the angels during the cleanse. Their pleads and screams were broadcasted across hell through the radios like the Radio demon’s previous plot, but never at this scale.

“Calm down (Y/N), the Shadow demon’s a nice person from what I’ve heard, she won’t hurt you if you haven’t done anything to her.” Millie assured you, her voice calm but still held a hint of nervousness.

“Shadow demon’s a “her”? Well that’s a first.” you scoffed. He, they… the rumours never got their pronouns down, but you’ve never heard anyone call the Shadow demon a “her”.

“Yeah well, she said she’ll have an eye to bring you to her. So it’ll benefit all of us, hopefully mostly you, that you follow her orders.” Moxie continues checking the clock on the wall.

You let out a frustrated sighed. “Well fuck that. Nice or not, I’m not sticking around to find out. If you can’t do the job just give me a fucking refund and we’ll be on our merry way.”

“Well no can do (Y/N), the boss already spent it on keeping the TV ad on the air.” Moxie crossed his arms.

You were fuming at this point, and that incessant tapping wasn’t making it any better. “I don’t care about your fucking jingle, I want my fucking money back if you can’t do what I paid you to do!” you hit the table under you in anger.

“Um, guys?” Millie tapped on Moxie’s shoulder as she stared to her right.

“And what the fuck is making that tapping sou-” Your complaints were drowned by the gazed of the most unsettling creature that was outside the window.

Behind the glass, hovered a single eyeball with a pink iris and a black star of its pupil. Its bat wings that kept it airborne tapped against the glass with each flap. The thing had no eyelids so it simply maintained eye contact with you as you stared back at it in shock.

“Moxie, is that the ‘eye’ that we were waiting for?” Millie breaks the silence, pointing to the mysterious but obvious eye.

“I-uh, I think so?” Moxie walks over to the window to open it and the eye bat thing calmly flies into the room. The eyeball makes its way over to you and circles over your head whimsically before flying out of the window to watch you from outside.

“It’s actually kinda cute.” Millie walks over to the window to get a closer look at it. The eye turns to watch her and gives her a light bump on her cheek before returning to stare at you.

“See, no harm at all!” Millie giggled, turning back to the both of you.

“I suppose that your cue to follow it?” Moxie nudges you.

You let out another heavy sigh and rubbed your nose bridge. You know what, fuck it. What do you have to lose at this point?

“Fine. And if I manage to come back with their whereabouts I want to see his severed head when ya’ll actually do your job.”

You exit their headquarters, not bothering to slam the door on your way out. You may be mad, but you’re not that mean... Even if this is hell. Outside the main entrance of the building was the same winged eye keeping its self afloat at your eye level. You exit the building and the eye flies around you like it did before. Its makes a full circle around you and flies off in a direction. It stops a few steps away from you before turning back to look at you, beckoning you to follow it.

You bit your lip nervously as you took the first few steps of letting the thing guide you to your potential death.

As you followed the eye, you began to grow interested in the little thing. Was it another denizen of hell or was it like one of the Shadow demon’s minions? As far as you knew, the Shadow demon could manipulate the shadows and hide in them, not eyeball minion magic.

You were also beginning to agree with Millie that it was kind of cute in its own way. As it guided you through the quiet back streets, it would turn to see if you were following and sometimes do a play full barrel roll or loop in the air. You couldn’t help but smile at its antics, your mind no longer worrying about your encounter with the rumoured shadow demon

As you walk about of the alley and onto the main road, you are met with a building with a sign that said “Shadow Records” in black calligraphy. It resembled a multi-story shophouse with a new coat of paint and traditional doors and windows that gave off a sense of sophistication and warmth, unlike most of the bar and brothel filled streets of hell.

At the entrance stood a young demon girl swaying side to side on her thin legs. She wore a pink lolita dress with white ruffles and blue accents. As you stepped closer, you could see pastel pink bandages that wrap her forearms loosely and covered her eyes and forehead. The pink almost blending in with her light pink skin, though her electric blue hair made her stand out from afar.

She does a little pirouette at the top of the stairs and stops in your direction. The eye makes a dash over to her and she lets out a musical giggle as it lands in between her two hair buns. You walk up the stairs and she greets you excitedly.

“Hi there! You must be (Y/N), the name’s Amelie, Deni’s waiting for you upstairs. Come on!” she opens the door and steps into the building.

“Um, okay?” you follow her in hesitantly. This is where you die, you guessed.

The young demon girl, Amelie, hums a whimsical tune as she skips her way up a flight of stairs with you in tow. Your first impression is that she seems to be too young to be here in hell. Then again, everything could be an act to get you comfortable and then kill you so you kept your guard up.

Seeing as how your previous companion was so familiar with the girl, and is still seated comfortably between her hair, you figured that it was probably her minion instead of the Shadow demon.

“Come on, we’ve been waiting for you.” Amelie calls to you as she skips towards a large oak door that looks like it was built of someone thrice you height. You gulped at you looked up at the scale of the door.

Amelie raps her knuckles on the door in a rhythm before opening it.

Before you sat what you could only assume is the shadow demon behind their desk with a manila folder in hand. Their red eyes glanced up at you as the door opened and you could feel their white cat-like pupils bare into your very being. It was at this point you realise that the dark wall behind was also lined with eyes that were staring back at you. In fear, you took a step back, ready to make a mad dash for the exit.

A soft laugh reached your ears and you turned to see a muscular reptilian leaning against the long desk look at you with mirth in his black sclera and turquoise eyes.

The Shadow demon speaks up. 

“Hello (Y/N). Welcome to Shadow records.”

[maladaptive-ninja-returns]

It’s The Avengers (02x12)

Loki x Reader Avengers The Office AU (Slowwwwww Burn)

Season 2 Episode 11: Far From Home

Season Finale

Warnings: dirty thoughts, a little fluff, good parenting, monsters and men. I am sorry but I am not sorry.

Word Count: I really wanna just leave everything and go live with the monks in the mountains if they allow me to take my laptop with me so I can keep writing.

A/N: Nearly forgot to mention the wonderful @marvel-lous-things for her original creativity that inspired the sam-bucky dialogue. I’ll link the original post here. I also did add some Brooklyn Nine Nine scene in there because I WANT TO AND I CAN!! I MISS B99!

MASTERLIST in bio, darlings. Tags are open (check bio)

"Why do you have to be so hard?"

Peter, Javier('s camera), Wanda, Vision and you turned your heads towards a very heated Sam trying to walk out of the elevator with Bucky, their bulked up biceps fighting each other to get out of the elevator together, telling the other to go first, but going at it together, eventually looking at the other with a murderous stare. Finally, Sam rushed out before Bucky.

"It's not my fault if you cannot handle my weight," Bucky gruntled lowly, forcing you to exchange some very confused looks with Peter, Wanda and Vision. Vision was more curious than confused like the good young baby AI that he was.

"Handle your weight? Dude, do you know how hard it is to handle your ass when you keep shifting like that? Throwin' me off my rhythm."

What started as confusion now turned into the horror of knowing the unknown, forcing your eyes wide.

"Wha-" Peter tried to ask you in a whisper, but you were already covering his ears, making him look at you questioningly. "You know I'm eighteen, right?"

"I throw you off your rhythm?" Bucky jolted back slightly. "It's you who's always wiggling under me and throwing me off balance!"

"Of course I gotta wiggle, man!" Sam burst out, "you dig your fingers in me so hard! I can't just freeze there when you get rough!"

Now you were covering your ears while all Peter could whisper was, "no, you know what, cover my ears. I liked it better that way. Please. I beg you."

"I only do that because you push us too high, okay!" Bucky argued, compelling you to hide your head inside the couch. Peter just sat there frozen in shock, his eyeballs on the verge of coming out. "You clearly still have no idea how to ride because you're too used to doing it solo."

You whimpered. Peter managed to blink. Hard.

Vision was simply staring at the two of them.

Wanda went by normally shuffling the Uno cards.

"Fine, then I'll go back to solo," Sam raised his hands.

"What, no!" Bucky begged, "I like it! Please, next time I'll won't dig my fingers so hard."

"And no biting."

"It was one time! The first time! I was scared of the freaking high!"

"You bit my shoulder! I said no biting."

"Okay. Okay!"

"All right."

A shake of the hand wrapped around the other's arm sealed the deal before the party looked at the crowd sitting on the lounge floor.

"'Sup," Sam casually greeted the four of you. Bucky just simply waved.

Red . You and Peter were red from your ears to your neck.

You got up, your hands trying to find some sort of support to hold you through everything you were going inside you right now, before ultimately folding them together.

"I'm glad you guys reached a common ground," you pointed out with a forced smile that nearly made your eyes disappear, "but there's um...a bedroom for a reason. Please, think about it before...you know, you guys argue again."

Saying that, you left the lounge, whispering, "Now how the heck do I bleach my memory?"

"Wait, I'm coming with you," Peter announced, getting up and taking your hand to walk out.

"Where are you guys going?" Bucky asked.

"Dr Banner's lab," Peter stated rubbing his arms, "to find out how we can destroy brain cells?"

"But doesn't that affect other functions too?"

"It would be worth it."

Sam and Bucky exchanged a confused look before turning to the two lovers left behind.

Vision shifted his gaze between your figures disappearing behind the wall while Sam and Bucky, contemplated something before turning to Wanda. "I think they were terrified for some reason."

Wanda : Sam and Bucky were talking about their plans to fly. Well, Sam doing the flying while Bucky hangs on his back. Stark showed me the whole carrier thing he made for them. *nods* *sighs* Yeah, Y/N and Peter can't read thoughts now can they. *eyes go wide in some latent thought* That girl has such a graphic memory! She could already imagine everything within seconds. *scrunches nose* in 4K! *shudders*

The Lab

"Pass me that blue vial," Banner murmured near the glass, the camera taking his face shot from the other side of the glass- zooming out to focus on a thin glass-like structure being held by a pair of tongs right in the middle of that vacuumed glass cube.

Long white slender fingers pressed a glass vial filled with the blue liquid right to Bruce's nose, making the scientist jolt a little before looking at the bearer of the hands, sighing, and taking it in his gloved hands.

The lab goggles were adjusted again before the vial was placed in another set of tongs and introduced inside the controlled environment.

This time, behind the glass besides Bruce, Loki showed his face, looking at that thin glass strand with utmost curiosity.

"What forces are you conjuring this time, doctor?"

Bruce shushed him, concentrating on the solution.

"Alright," he got away from the cube to clear his throat, "Friday, take the exact amount right to the very last millimetre and pour the N.A.T. on the compound."

Loki was on the edge of his toes now.

Loki : It is only once in a fortnight that these excuses of humans do something partly entertaining. I wouldn't want to miss it when Banner has another mishap and morphs himself into a rabbit this time. *gazing in the distance fondly* Maybe a purple one. *smiles*

"In three, two..."

Loki was quickly shifting his gaze between the experiment and Bruce. "Oh for the sake of Valhalla! Just do it already!"

"One!"

Flashes and sparks flew the moment the liquid touched the compound, making the two cover their eyes till they were sure the blazes died.

"Experiment ninety-nine point nine-nine percent successful, Doctor Banner."

"What's that, a new floor-cleaner?" you commented, walking inside the lab with Peter.

Loki leaned in to watch the outcome of the experiment while Bruce removed his goggles and gloves, too struck by the final product to contemplate your poor jokes.

"That's..." Loki lost his words, following Bruce's hands as they carefully took out an almost translucent and seemingly delicate piece of a flower made of glass- its petals decorated with capillaries running through them, reflecting softly on their own wavelengths, dancing gracefully, twirling and shifting with the lights falling on them.

"A flower," Loki grumbled.

You and Peter, on the other hand, were gasping out loud- clearly mesmerised by the outcome.

"How did you do that Doctor Banner?!" you exclaimed, not able to contain your excitement.

"Just used the geometric structures of certain compounds to make a piece of art for me," Bruce cajoled, clearly both impressed and shocked with himself.

Loki snorted, catching your attention. "And here I was thinking you were finally making some use of that brain of yours Banner."

"Come on, Loki," you stressed, "this is practically art out of science. Appreciate it. And," you turned around to look at Bruce, wiggling your shoulders as you spoke, "I'm guessing it's for someone special."

Bruce blushed straightaway!

"Uhh..." he tried to hide behind his hands while adjusting his glasses, "It's her birthday. I-I-I asked her when's her birthday once and she told me she didn't remember her real one. Just that today is the date she thinks is her birthday. So, I thought I'd do something special for her."

"Ugh, kill me," Loki complained, stomping- very graciously, his shoulders moving with an angry swing under that dark green t-shirt he was wearing- to the other end of the lab.

You, on the other hand, squealed with utter delight, jumping where you stood. "This is fantastic, Bruce!"

"Thanks!" Bruce glowed, smiling ear to ear. "And do you know it's pretty sturdy. Almost indestructible. And at the same time really delicate."

Bruce : *twirling the flower in his hand with the most tender smile* Just like her. *smiles again* *pauses* *camera pans in his anxious face* Shit, don't tell her I said that.

The camera caught Loki still rolling his eyes at the entire conversation at the other end, bonking the little bobblehead of Hulk kept on Bruce's desk.

"Oh! Oh! Oh! I should bake her some of my molten chocolate cupcakes!"

This caught the God's attention.

"Yes," he declared out of nowhere, composing himself, "that would be a great gesture."

"Oh, but we're out of ingredients. I finished the last batch when Cassie came over," you pointed.

"Well, take one of the cars to the nearest grocery store," Bruce stated matter-of-factly.

Your lips turned into an 'o' before shaking your head. "I can't do that."

"Why not?" Bruce questioned, "I'm sure Tony won't mind."

"Won't mind what?"

The camera swerved to the lab's entrance to watch Tony saunter in.

"Taking one of your cars so she can get the ingredients to make cupcakes for Nat's birthday," Peter answered.

"For everyone," Loki added from his corner.

Tony looked at you and shrugged, "Sure. I don't mind. But I don't want even a single scratch on my cars. Otherwise, Friday can order some for you."

You stood there quiet while everyone looked for an answer.

"Yeah, I think Friday should handle that."

"Oh, come on, Tony!" Bruce huffed, "let her go if she wants to go. I'm sure nothing's gonna happen on the most desolate road in this part of the state."

"No, that's-" you tried to speak, only to be cut short by Tony.

"Okay. Not what I was going for but since you started it, the weirdest shit happens on desolate roads, Bruce!"

"Guys, listen-"

"She'll be in her car," Bruce stressed, "stopping at the grocery store, getting the stuff and coming back. Not to mention Friday'll be there looking out for her."

"Okay, doc-"

"I was talking about responsible driving and you just had to take it to another level!"

"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DRIVE!"

Silence.

Neither of the science buddies tried to say something, shifting where they stood.

"Well, that solves everything," Loki's words echoed through the air of embarrassment.

The Driveway

"You really don't have to do this."

The camera captured your very concerned face before panning out to show Tony and Loki standing on your either side while Peter sat by the side with his sunglasses on, sipping on some orange soda through a crazy straw.

Peter : *glasses on as he finishes sipping through his crazy straw* *a good wind playing with his hair* Oh, I know how it's gonna go down. *turns his head to the sound of the engine getting louder* Better than a Formula One.

Thank you, Friday," Tony announced as a black SUV comes and stands in the driveway right next to you. He stepped towards it, clicking open the door and gesturing you to move, "In you go."

But you didn't budge. "Yeah, I don't think so." Shaking your head vigorously.

"Why not?" Tony asked point-blank.

"Uh..." you hesitated, taking the corners of your jacket in your fingers and wringing them, "I...I don't think I'm made for driving."

"Everyone is made for everything. What everyone lacks is practice."

Sounds of clapping broke just as Tony concluded, making everyone turn to watch Loki and Peter applauding his words.

"Not bad, Stark," Loki applauded over the soft wind flapping your hair everywhere.

"But-"

"We're just trying something new here, kid," Tony pointed out, shifting the door wider.

You looked at him and then at the car, your fingers nearly ripping the fabric of your jacket apart before a breath of 'ah, screw it’ left your lips and you climbed in."

Tony put on his glasses and moved to the other side, all the while looking at Peter, "there better not be any crumbs and sticky soda on my driveway."

Peter gave him a thumbs-up as continued munching happily on the chips.

The camera now shifted to the dashboard, catching a good angle of the car's inside from the front.

Tony sat in the passenger seat and shut his door the same time Loki sat in the back and shut his.

"Alright then, let's begi-" he began, before stopping short on catching Loki in the back- leaning forward to hear what all Tony had to say, "What are you doing here?"

"I don't know how to drive your modest transport, either," he simply stated.

Tony opened his mouth to say something snarky but you beat him to it.

"Oh, thank God! It sucks being the only adult in the room who does not know how to drive."

Tony looked at you for a moment before settling in his seat. "You can stay but I don't want to hear a peep out of you. Okay, you" he pointed at you with his eyes, "seatbelt."

You quickly let your hands go to your side to bring down the seatbelt and secure it down at the other end. "Now," Tony continued, "look down at the pedals. From your right- gas, brake, clutch. The Gas pedals move the car, the brake will slow it down and bring it to a stop and the clutch will help you shift gears when the speed changes. When the speed goes high on this meter, the gear goes high, When it goes low, we go low. Okay? Try moving the gear and see if it's comfortable. Yes, just like that. Good. See that button with the start/stop sign? Push it when you want to start the car. Yes, you can start it in neutral as well. Once you start the engine you put the gear in drive while pressing down on the clutch. Okay? Wanna try it?"

Your breaths were a little shallow by now. "You sure?" you nearly whimpered.

"Yes, I am. It's okay. I am sitting right here," Tony comforted you.

You looked down at the pedals while your hands gripped hard on the wheels. Taking in one deep breath, you pressed the button and felt the car vibrate a little but never heard the roar of the engine. "Is it broken? I don't think it started-"

"It has a quiet engine," Tony blurted out to stop you from hitting the button again and again.

Making an apologetic face, you wiggled in your seat, straightened your back, checked the mirrors for no reason at all and took another deep breath. "Okay, now I press the clutch and change the gear?"

Tony nodded.

All this time Loki rested his hand in his palm, slowly getting tired of the instructions.

Pressing the clutch, you shifted the gear in drive.

"Perfect," Tony praised you, "now let go of the clutch slowly as you lightly put your foot on the gas."

With excitement in your eyes, you nodded and let go of the pedal. And just as you did, the car jerked, throwing Loki ahead.

"I'm so sorry!" you shouted, in Tony and Loki's direction.

"And this is why you wear a seatbelt," Tony followed with a chuckle, looking at the grunting figure of Loki trying to sit back up.

.

The Driveway

"Yo," Sam greeted Peter as he came out with Bucky, "got kicked out of the house?"

Peter shook his head, slurping his soda, never shifting in his seat that he was clearly well-adjusted in. "Watching Mr Stark teach Y/N how to drive."

Both Sam and Bucky looked at the SUV in the distance jerking and moving before coming to a stop, starting, jerking and moving ahead, suddenly picking up speed, suddenly screeching to a halt before the whole cycle started again.

"Huh."

Peter pointed to his left without looking. "There are chairs in there."

.

Half an Hour Later

"What're you guys doing in the driveway?"

Peter, Sam and Bucky- all three of them flinched hard at Natasha's voice coming from right next to them.

Bucky : She is sneaky. I don't like sneaky.

*camera pans out to show Sam standing behind Bucky with a plushie, throwing it suddenly from Bucky's left*

Bucky : *immediately tilts to the other side while taking out a knife from nowhere to stab the plushie*

Sam : We talked about this! Assess the f****ng target before going 'stab'! *continues in his angry voice* Congratulations! You just killed a plushie!

"Watching Tony teach Y/N how to drive."

Behind Natasha came the huffing figure of Scott carrying bags on bags in both his hands. They looked at the amount he was carrying compared to the bulk in Natasha's hand.

"No wonder you always keep beating me in training!" Scott huffed and tried to breathe through his words. He dropped the bags and let his body go floomf over them. "You're sooo strong," he heaved, "make me like you, senpai ."

"Get off the bags," she stressed, "you'll break the nachos," before turning to the trio with a stern stare, "you fellas really don't have anything to do?"

"We're supporting Y/N," Peter answered, pointing at the car nearly missing the pavement and skidding while making a turn.

But Nat didn't buy it. "What's the bet for?" She finally asked, forcing the trio to look at each other.

"How much time it takes for Tony to lose his cool," Sam admitted, "I'm going for twenty more minutes. Bucky says Tony's already lost his cool. He's just sitting in there crying. Peter thinks he'll last another hour."

The car turned and came towards where all of them sat. Nat took one step back as the vehicle skidded to a halt right next to Peter, the bumper giving him a little bonk on his knees.

The camera shifted to inside the car with three horrified faces trying to find their breaths.

"I told you," you tried but no voice came out of your throat, "I...told...you."

"Okay," Tony breathed, gulping down the horror but still having his hand wrapped around the grab-handle as tightly as humanly possible, "okay. Um...Loki," he announced, "your...turn?"

.

"You bitch," you hissed, "you said you didn't know how to drive!"

The car swerved by the audience effortlessly as they hooted, whistled and cheered.

Loki veered the steering wheel with such professionalism that you cursed him again.

"I swear I didn't!" Loki chuckled with excitement, "this is just so easy and fun!"

"Eyes on the road, Greeny," Tony ordered, but his eyes too were lit and he clearly wasn't holding the handles now, "now show me how you go through those two bars and then back it up."

Loki did what Tony asked, swerving smoothly through the bars, breaking without throwing anyone in the window and, reversing just as smoothly through them.

"Woah!" Tony heard himself saying, "okay now show me that thing Lighting McQueen does in 'Cars'."

Loki scrunched his nose. "The movie we saw last night?"

"Yup!"

"Brace yourselves!"

And saying that, he hit the gas and showed the crowd how to turn right to go left, making Peter and Tony lose their minds in their rush, while Sam landed a 'hot damn!', Bucky and Scott had their jaws dropped. Natasha was the only one not really phased by it.

Natasha : *nonchalantly* He can drive. *does a little head tilt* Good for him.

The vehicle came to a halt near the entrance and you were the first one to get out.

"Hey, Y/N, you did good!" Sam and Nat tried to cheer you up.

"Yeah," was all you said before turning to walk back in.

"Y/N, kid," Tony called out for you, "come on let's give it another shot."

"No, Mr Stark. I think I'm done for the day."

"But we didn't even go about for even an hour. Let's work on your gear shifting without looking at them."

"I don't think that'll hel-"

"We won't know until we try. Come on let's take anoth-"

"I can't!" You nearly shouted, taking everyone by surprise. "I can't Mr Stark! Driving requires me to focus on everything at once and I made not for that! I get distracted so easily. I can't even drive safely on an empty road inside my own home what makes you think I could possibly handle an entire vehicle on a busy road?! And believe me when I say I've been told time and again to change this 'habit' of mine. Well, I can't." You shrugged forcefully. "I really can't. That's how I freakin' am. So, sorry you have to deal with a f****d up kid like me."

Ending that, you walked inside, leaving everyone mum- discreetly looking at Tony before walking back in. Everyone except Loki.

Tony looked at the God, giving him a once-over. "The hell you looking at me like that?"

Loki just crossed his arms across his chest, shaking his head, "She can't drive. She clearly doesn't have the confidence and would have to take a lot to create the natural focus required. Just wondering what you're going to do now."

Tony furrowed his brows at Loki. "What d'ya mean what I'll do? I'll find a way to help with whatever's required. It's not her fault she can't focus or is easily distracted. I'll find something to help her with that too."

Loki : *looking at an invisible void in the distance* huh. I cannot believe I'm saying this but Stark one hell of a father figure. *Pouring his lips* *scrunching his nose* Is that why all these wayward nuisance of beings choose to live with him? *Looks behind the camera* What? I don't see him as a father figure. All I see him is as a bother figure. Always bothering me any chance he gets.

*camera pans out to show Tony standing beside him leaning on the car*

Tony : Would you like me to take you horse-riding?

Loki :

Tony : *arches his brow and places his head on his fist, watching Loki tenderly*

Loki : *not making eye-contact* *softly* that would be great. Thank you

Tony : *pats him the back and leaves* Good job today.

Loki : *closes eyes* *shakes his head* *moans* Yeah, I already feel weird.

.

The Dorms

Tony lightly knocked your door before clicking open a bit and asking if he could come in.

The camera tried to follow him but Tony closed the door behind it, forcing it to go out to the balcony.

He sat down on the edge of your bed looking at the half-finished sketch of a woman.

"You made this?" He turned to ask your figure lying on your stomach with your head towards the footboard.

You nodded.

"Wow!" He whispered with enthusiasm before his eyes caught something in the corner by the window. "Is that a canvas? You've been painting. On a canvas!"

You shrugged. "It's not that hard. Anyways I'm not that good."

"Why do you think that?" He asked as softly as possible. "Have you seen what you create? This is beautiful!"

"This is half-finished."

"Well, it's better than not being created at all!"

You blinked, and a lone tear left your eye to directly vanish in the sheets under you.

"I'm scared," your broken voice declared in a whisper.

"Of what?"

"Of not being able to drive safely. I can hardly focus on what gear to shift while having to quickly judge what pedal to hit. How am I ever supposed to drive when all my senses aren't in the car with me?"

"Hey," he stressed softly, brushing your hair away, "we'll figure it out. And it was just the first day. You already learned which gears are what. And you were really nailing those brakes."

You both giggled.

"There's nothing you cannot do," Tony assured you, his eyes giving you a soft yet stern look, "now stop beating yourself up, get out of these stinky bedsheets and go make sure Peter and Bucky don't burn up my kitchen to figure out your cupcake recipe."

You chortled and Tony looked at you like you were the most precious thing in the world right now.

"Wow," Loki's voice came from the opposite corner of the room where he stood with arms crossed ever so casually, "you two really are boring. And cringy."

Tony and you gasped and threw a pillow each at him.

"Get out!" You both said in unison.

.

The Lounge

"You are such a sore loser."

You tilted your head and arched your brows at Loki.

"It wasn't a competition, Loki."

He simply shrugged and popped a grape in his mouth. "Something a loser would say."

"Whatever, man," you muttered, shooing him away as you went towards a very confused Peter hanging down from the ceiling to find out what Bucky was trying to cook.

"Wait." You heard Loki say after you felt a soothing coolness grab your hand lightly, making you turn back to him.

"Hmm?"

"There's-" he looked around to see if anyone was listening- clearly ignoring the camera- before coming back to you, "a thing. I need to learn how to paint. I've heard you're a really good artist. And clearly, I'm not. So, would you help me?"

You : This guy *a smirk lies at the corner of your lips* has the weirdest ways of saying 'I'm sorry, Y/N. I wish I could make your day better'. *nods* *raises shoulders* *bites lips* usually he does.

"Hmm," you pretended to think, "I don't know. Let me just show off my artist skills around a little bit and then I'll start teaching you."

"Oh, you think I'm-I'm trying to make you feel better? Don't make false assumptions, woman!"

"Din meek fils issimtion wimin," you teased him with your scrunched nose, right before Tony walked through the two of you.

"Five-second rule," he announced as your hands parted for Tony to go ahead and he slipped something over Loki's wrist.

"What's this?" Loki looked at the green bracelet that clicked shut over his wrist and did not come undone no matter what he tried.

"Just something to stop you from jumping in rooms unannounced," Tony responded, waving at him as he went away with a happy gait.

"Y/N," Natasha called out from the kitchenette, "you better take over before these boys make something everyone's gonna regret. And no one eats it before midnight!"

“Stark, get me out of this!”

.

Outside The Library

You walked with the camera following you out of the library, running right into Loki.

"Hey, have you seen Mr Stark?"

"No," Loki shook his head, "I rarely look at things I find unappealing."

"I made something for Nat, but I want his opinion on it. Come on," you pressed, taking his hand and pushing him away from the library and towards the lab.

"Stark's opinion? I'm sure Gordon Ramsay would be a better choice than him."

"I'm surprised you know who that is."

"Of course, I know who that is. Everyone fears him. I respect that. And he seems to have a cult!"

You sighed and turned the corner. "He has followers, not a cult. Like fans."

"What's the difference?"

"W-" and you found yourself short of an explanation, glad you were already by the lab's doors.

"Let's just concentrate on you making friends first, okay," you said in your best sarcastic tone, swinging open the door to watch Tony in the middle of the lab, going for the very familiar Pandora's box. The thing similar to the one that had teleported you to another planet.

Everything happened at once in front of the camera.

"DAD, NO!"

The small bag you'd been carrying in your hand fell down on the ground as you ran towards Tony. A shriek left your lungs as you forced him away from the familiar light that came out of the box. Loki was already trying to shield Javier behind the camera while trying to get you away from the path. Tony was not aware of what was happening until he was touching the floor.

And the next second everything disappeared.

The cameras in the lab caught Tony on the ground trying to get up, looking for you.

"Y/N?" He shouted out for you.

"Loki!" He commanded, getting up- not so gracefully- on his feet.

"Javier!" He begged, only to see Bruce, Natasha and Peter rush in from the doors.

"They're gone, Mr Stark," Friday's voice echoed through the silence of the lab, as the man tried to count his breaths while the others rushed to help him.

.

Unknown Place

The camera was blurry. A few sounds came from a distance before the lens shook and was wiped off where it lay- in the desert. It focused on two figures lying just a few feet away.

Javier's figure came in front as he tried to shake up one of them. And just as he did, Loki stirred, grunted and got up with a little difficulty.

Javier tapped his shoulder to get his attention away from his strange surroundings to your unconscious figure lying next to him.

"Y/N," he called out for you tenderly, his eyes scanning for any wounds on your arms or face. "Y/N, wake up," he gently tapped your cheeks and arms. "Y/N," he mildly shook you in vain.

"Y/N STARK!!" he shouted, giving you a good shake, making you get up with a scream.

"What the hell, Loki?!!"

"Come on," he commanded more than requested, taking your arms and helping you stand up.

"W-where are we?"

Javier went out of the frame and the camera was lifted up from the ground to show the barren land you and Loki were looking out to. Shades of yellow went till the horizon with curled up black tree-like structures at various intervals.

"I don't know," Loki sighed, his eyes taking in everything.

You turned around, the camera catching you walk over the rough ground outside the frame. "It's certainly not Earth. I haven't been to this...place before. We must stay close. Javier, do not leave my sight."

"Uhh...Loki?"

"Of course, you too, Y/N."

"No, Loki," you continued, the camera catching your concerned gaze as your hand pointed at something, "look."

The camera turned to face down the little hill that you three stood on to capture a battalion of aliens standing in prime formation at attention. Scales of iridescent gold and brown marked the skin on their shoulders and limbs, claws for hands and feet and a wolf-like face covered in warrior helmets.

"Yeah, suddenly I've started appreciating that old planet-thing I was trapped on," you mentioned, your voice breaking with fear. "You can teleport us back, right?"

"Ye-"

Both you and the camera turned to look at Loki, who was looking down at the amulet on his wrist.

"Stark," he sighed.

"Shit," you cursed, "sorry."

A blowhorn sounded down the hills throughout the valley, making you jump close to Loki, catching the fabric of his Henley from the elbow with your fingers.

"Okay, I've seen The Lord of The Rings enough times to know this is not good!" You nearly shouted with fear.

And just as you uttered those words, the clanking of armour sounded close to you, coming up the hill.

Three of those alien warriors came up, their march quite in unison as the taller, bulkier one walked ahead of the two who seemed to be accompanying him.

The camera stepped farther away as the creatures stepped closer while you tried to be brave yet took a step back so as to let Loki shadow you partially.

The stomps of threatening footsteps stopped nearly seven feet away from you. The stench of something eerie filled the air.

The two aliens at the back stabbed the ground with their metallic staffs, creating a gust of wind along with an incoherent vibrating echo.

The leader stepped forward towards you three, his gait slow and measured, his eyes shining a concentrated mix of purple. You shifted on your feet. Loki didn't.

He stopped right in front of Loki, standing at least two feet taller than him.

"Loki," came a low-pitched growl from the jaw that opened to reveal more fangs inside, "ward of Odin. Son of Laufey. Saviour of Asgard-"

"You could save the titles. It'll take you an entire day to get over half of them," Loki declared without skipping a beat.

The creature paused before taking out his sword from its sheath, making you step back.

"Loki, master of the Nubrath!" The leader spoke again, this time while holding his sword in both his...claws and raising it to the God. "Your army is ready."

The blowhorn sounded again.

"We're all prepared to take over the earth under your rule."

~End of Season 2~

You’ll get season 3 if you curse me with the balance of work and home to get me as many hours to write as possible. Bonus if you get me my dream job. No, I won’t tell you, you have to figure it out on your own.

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 E3: So Many Dragons in This One

Y’all so I’m like getting over a pretty nasty cold that’s pretty much wiped me clean like a hard reset and this episode coinciding with it is something else because this episode is essentially a fever dream start to finish.

First off:

If your mind didn’t immediately start playing ska-like alt rock and go through every lyric from “Escape From the City” then I can’t help you. Because that’s where my mind directly went and stayed for the entirety of this episode.

Back in the museum, Yugi learns about some more crypto-history.

Because Y’all, Yugioh just LOVES to screw with history. I mean we’ve already seen what they did to Seto Kaiba’s timeline, but get a load of what they’re about to do with world history.

(Arthur now has the USA gradient because I was at a loss of how else to describe Arthur. If Bandit Keith comes back then I’ll be mixing fonts, yet again.)

This was done mostly to recap the last 3 seasons, but also to drop in some brand new lore that came out of freakin nowhere.

Atlantis.

Yes, he said Atlantis.

(read more under the cut)

In the actual dialogue of the show, Tea mentions she read a single book about Atlantis once in her life, and then Joey and Tristan go “Tea, you nerd!” and it’s like wow the standards are low in this group. One single book, boys? That’s all it takes to be a nerd? When you have any of the KAIBAS right over there? One single book is the requirement?

Starting to think no one in this universe knows what a nerd is.

So the underwater cave dwelling from a few episodes back is none other than the Atlantis ruins. I feel like this should be a way bigger deal in terms of like all of history, since in this universe, Atlantis is time wise at the dawn of (checks wikipedia)...proto-writing...and yet they seem to really have their math and large construction science down.

The arch wasn’t really utilized (I hesitate to say “discovered” as it is an arch) until about 2000 BC or so. Good on the Atlanteans, I guess?

Don’t know why we’re getting so sidetracked by cards when a civilization 10000 years ago could make immense underwater 60 ft castles that don’t immediately collapse under the pressure, but this is the Yugioh universe and everyone’s card addiction runs strong and true.

It just seems funny to me that Hawkins, who devoted I want to say like 60 years of his life toward becoming a walking encyclopedia about Egypt, got super sidetracked and ended up 10000 leagues under the sea in Atlantis. He just threw all that Egypt work completely to the wind and basically changed his career at age I dunno 70 or so. Or maybe this guy is only 50 but he just seems super way old to me.

(And raising his granddaughter for some reason? Hell knows what happened to Rebecca’s parents, but knowing Yugioh, it will probably be really, really tragic.)

So then, although Atlantis is in our world and under the sea, Hawkins decides to throw another fast one on us.

(I just chose a random number, but Buzzfeed decided Washington was 34th. Which is wild.)

Bro took this moment to explain to me in great and excruciating detail that the Atlanteans in Aquaman did in fact invent tanks. Aquaman is his favorite. Ya, I know.

So I thought “ah, this is the Shadow Realm” (since we have seen Bakura just make a monster a real boy before) but then it became kind of unclear if the Shadow Realm is a different realm than this other realm which is just where the nice monsters live. So um...I’m still not sure about that one, I’ll get back to you when it’s made clear (I may never get back to you on that one)

Then Rebecca decides to drop this lore about the ghost that lives in Yugi Muto’s head that we’ve been *pretty Sure* up to this point was strictly Egyptian dealing with strictly Egyptian things.

I am not entirely sure how we’re going to take a guy who lived 5000 years ago and explain why he’s living now in AD 2002 Yugi Muto’s head because of some guy 10000 years ago. But they’re going to try.

Like I’ve heard this referred to as a filler season, because it uh did not happen in the Manga. So, legally, they can’t really touch the manga at all (and I assume they were probably waiting for the manga to finish at this point), and so we’re just gonna...pull Atlantis out of nowhere because the nice thing about Atlantis is that it is so freakin old that it is well outside of copyright. Completely fair use. But it’s still kinda wild.

Also, Yugi made sure to off-handedly tell us that most of the monsters who’ve invaded their world have been very, very, nice, and that’s why everyone has been so chill.

I mean. OK?

You still have literal dragons flying around but apparently only some of the dragons are mean and attack, the rest just chill and float around like a fish or something. Personally, I wouldn’t be thrilled by this.

Hawkins notices Yugi’s enchanted dead guy necklace, and without asking “so...does this belong to a dead guy? Did you get this from the dead guy’s corpse? Yugi? Yugi, look at me. Yugi, young man, is this another dead guy necklace you’ve been carrying around in your pocket because I feel like I see a problem here, buster.”

Hawkins suggests, instead:

Oh OK...that’s a lot to take in.

Didn’t expect giant possessed lady statues but it’s a nice spooky touch. Can’t have enough giant possessed lady statues in your anime, honestly.

Also, I’m really glad they gave this skinny lady statue a double chin.

And after all that, Hawkins decides he’s done with his one single afternoon in Japan, and he’s going to go and travel 16 hours back to the US stuck in a plane within hearing distance of Rebecca. Worth that 32 hour round trip for that one afternoon in Japan (or actually one way is 4 hours longer than the other way or something? I forget the details.)

And like the show had him blush and then Tea got mad, but like Yugi also blushed when Mai gave him a note once that said “thanks for the help!” so I feel like Yugi just shuts down completely whenever he has to deal with girls.

Maybe this is just the face Yugi makes when he quickly enters the pyramid zone and is like “Pharaoh, it’s getting mad weird out there!” And Pharaoh’s just sitting on his throne eating cheese whiz straight out of a can in star pj’s with matching bootspants and he’s like “My Gods, Yugi! If I’m here, and you’re here, who’s driving the plane!?” and then they just start shrugging at eachother about who has to go on the date this time until Yugi snaps out of it.

ah, a disembodied voice.

Literally thought it was my own voice.

It keeps Yugi up for a while, but when has Yugi ever fallen asleep right away on this show?

After Yugi calms down enough to go the hell to bed, we zoom back to our Xtreme sports boys who have finally decided to stop Tony Hawking all over this island long enough to deliver the sober news that Gurimo is freakin dead.

Which they barely brought up at all because who freakin cares about Gurimo? This guy sure didn’t.

Cool. Good plan.

Hard to rebuild civilization without people. Just throwing that out there.

But ya. Lets go end mankind on Episode 3. Thought it would take a little bit longer for him to get enough soul juice but apparently he’s good on the soul juice from these three juicy cards that have no souls (I thought).

3 God Cards + 1 Gurimo - 1 Rex - 1 Weevil = Destroy Humanity

First, a dream sequence.

This is one bizarre ass dream sequence and like...I don’t even know if I have much to say because it’s like...so out of left field and both out of the lore of this show and just barely inside the lore enough for it to work.

Still feels hella out of nowhere though.

That may be just the Dayquil talking.

Either way, we get to have Yugi run around in pjs again, but unfortunately they have no stars so I just don’t freakin care when see it. I get that stars are hard to animate and he’s a year older and maybe grew out of the star pj’s but c’mon. We had a good thing going, show.

But they hear a voice within the pyramid, and I’m using Tea’s font color here but it’s not Tea, it’s another girl who is...a lot like Tea honestly.

So up to this point we’ve accepted that the puzzle is all of Pharaoh’s mysteries and also mixed with the memories of Yugi as well. We have a room of short term memory (that pharaoh never uses) full of little clones of Yugi’s friends. We have a room full of all the lego pieces that Yugi lost over his young life (and 2 very cursed tamagachis.) We have a room that has a gigantic guardian Dark Magician who almost killed Shadi once. We also have several rooms that are just traps that can basically kill you, or if you are Shadi, just totally set you on fire, because screw Shadi.

Also it has this room:

But we find a new room that is like an entire fantasy realm and it’s like...so what memory is this?

Somewhat confusing if you’re me and you’ve assumed up to this point that everything in the puzzle has something to do with Pharaoh’s past. Apparently there’s just a door to another world in here they just never knew was here.

Just this entire time Yugi and Pharaoh were completely unaware that they had a DOOR TO ANOTHER WORLD in their necklace. Which, as I mentioned before, is where all the duel monsters live, but looks nothing like the Shadow Realm, which we’ve seen before.

And like honestly I kinda just figured at first that the giant eye was supposed to be there eating dragons, as if this was some sort of cycle of life for the duel monsters, to be a dragon, grow old, and then get devoured by the eyeball in the sky to start over again as nutrients to feed the baby dragons.

But in fact the eye is Not Normal and we should be alarmed by it.

Very hard to know what should and should not be normal when I’ve never seen this place before, also it has three crystal dragons that I guess the other monsters MUST be worshiping or something because check out the purple tile palace they made just for these crystal dragons.

Like this made me ask a LOT of questions about the civilization of duel monsters. Like who made this? Did a bunch of Kuriboh make this? Hell does this civilization works and is it a monarchy and are there castes?

Do they do taxes?

And then we meet her, the voice asking for our help, it’s this girl. Dark Magician girl. Nice to finally meet you. Wish it had a little more build up and made more sense.

We’ve talked to this chick before. She was digital at the time, but she kind of pretends that she already knows Pharaoh and Yugi and they kinda just...take this as it comes. I mean there wasn’t much time to deliver this dialogue so they were like, if the lady in the cornucopia hat says so, I guess we have to do the thing.

It is nice that we do finally get an explanation for why Pegasus could make all these cards but could not resurrect his dead wife--being that she is...not from this world.

But like now the puzzle not only dives into Pharaoh’s past but is also just a straight up a dimension portal. You can just...visit these people whenever? I guess?

I was getting used to the puzzle being a very large metaphor, and I wasn’t actually prepared for it to have a utilitarian use like a Stargate. This asks a lot of questions, but put those questions aside because we have to adopt this dragon by pulling a huge ass sword out of it’s right eyeball.

This show is SO mean to eyeballs.

She explains that there was some lore that lead to this sword being plunged into this buddy’s eye over here but I forgot it already. It was like half a sentence and then it was gone and I’m on Dayquil and I’m sure it’ll come back. At some point they’ll bring it all full circle, I’m sure.

Like if this happened in a dream then does this place even exist on a mortal plane at all? Can it only be accessed through dreams and being dead? It’s kind of a fascinating concept since these duel monsters have to be summoned through paper, which has all sorts of relevant meaning in a lot of Eastern mythologies.

Stuff I’ll never know because say goodbye to the Duel Monster Land that Apparently-Exists-Now-And-Absolutely-Always-Existed,-Stop-Thinking-About-Who-Invented-Tanks,-It-Was-Obviously-The-Atlanteans-10000-Years-Ago, we’re gonna go and take this huge ass dragon we have no business inheriting but are anyway because the dumbass ghost in our brain has this grand reputation that he banished some sort of evil 5000 years ago but has absolutely no memory of how the hell he did that or what even occurred, and because of his completely wiped bean, this makes him a complete idiot at best and a complete psychopath at his absolute worst.

But yeah, lets take this dragon and see what happens.

You gotta bring furniture, but the dragon is free. 2 bedrooms, no rugs, it’s free.

I just realized we got a dragon and not the sword. Only in this anime.

And then he wakes up to the last thing I expected.

It was nice of Yugi to take the time it took for him to get entirely dressed and ready, but I guess if the world has to end you gotta go out in style. Which for him means his school uniform because, although Yugi absolutely hates this school for some reason, he has a lot of pride for it. Just a crazy amount of school pride for how rarely he attends school and for the lengths he went to get out of soccer practice that one time. But will Yugi be caught dead in anything but his school colors? No.

HOW IS THIS CITY STILL STANDING.

Also Kaiba must be having a wild time on the top of Kaiba Tower but maybe he took a helicopter a while back to go on a world dragon tour because we didn’t hear a peep out of him this entire very Very VERY dragon-centric episode.

Really weird how many dragons there are with so few Kaibas. It’s like the moment they turned around, every dragon on Earth came out of hiding to throw a huge ass dragon party.

PS get a load of this dragon.

Why would you ever give a dragon an ass?

I don’t even know how this is possible because it doesn’t have a butt crack, but it’s got serious ass going on. It’s the Lizzo of dragons, when you set it to defense mode, it probs just twerks to intimidate the other side.

(Yugi’s friends are so freakin patient OMG)

Also how the hell can Yugi play this card on his duel disk if neither Kaiba or Pegasus have any idea this card exists? Magic, I guess? The duel disk is part magic?

Not like it matters much, we know from Bakura that you don’t need a duel disk to make real boy cards if you have a millennium item anyway.

So at this point I’m like...I think I watched the last episode of the season, I think it’s...out of order and bro was like “nope...it’s Episode 3. We’re still on Episode 3.”

And so after that it closed the...dimension joining portal, which was a Golden Compass style aurora borealis, then Dark Magician Girl returned to her home planet.

...Which is also dangling around Yugi’s neck.

This was a lot.

I have a lot of questions.

Everyone in domino SHOULD have a lot of questions but I think they all went back to bed.

A tornado with a GLOWING EYE tried to destroy their city, and they just rolled over and went back to bed.

This season sure takes off really quickly holy crap.

Now fair warning, because I’ve been hella sick the next recap is uhh...a huge mess so it will probably be a week or so before I post it/even get to it. At some point I started numbering them completely wrong and I either saved 10 caps to a different folder or I never made them in the first place and I honestly am not entirely sure. Last week is kind of a blur and it’s a mess on my desktop right now, so my pacing is gonna reflect that because I am...behind...on everything.

Oh dude and actually now that I look at what date it freakin is, I have to go to one of my best friends weddings real soon so can we just say...it might be a few weeks before I can steadily update again? I have to learn a whole dance routine for this giant wedding and y’all, I am not a dancer. And, while my friends have had dance classes since they were like 5, I’m like...low key extremely certain I will fall completely on my ass. Anyway, there is no way out of this situation I thought would never actually happen, and thought was just a funny idea they invented when they got drunk at the bachelorette, but nah, they remembered, and this is really happening but the bride will think it’s funny so here we go.

PS this dance is to the only existing mashup of Bollywood and N*syncs Bye Bye Bye (which, yes, it is a breakup song) I hope you feel the second hand embarrassment through your computer, I am dancing for 300+ people. Directly following the groom’s parent’s dance, which is 10 minutes long, and for which they hired a professional choreographer. We are the only dance out of four epically spectacular dances that is from the bride’s side, and our dance is...2 minutes and the equivalent of a high school lipsync.

TBH I'm low key excited to do it because potentially it could be a really great story depending on the reaction of what happens.

Anyway, so if I disappear for a while only to post fanart I’ve drawn out of stress, that is what I’ve been doing in the background. I’ve just been trying to remember how to do the Bye Bye Bye dance correctly for 2 straight weeks while feverishly trying to catch up with all my other work.

Also, because I mentioned George Washington, I had to go and find the horny grandma clip from Gilmore Girls and I’m so glad that two people on the internet managed to clip it, and I can’t believe the only two people who’ve clipped this did it with their phones. In fact, kudos to this youtuber for videoing a Tablet with his phone, because there’s no better way to watch a show from the 00′s than to make you feel really illegal about it.

[planetsxend]

“Moist”

@sweettifalockhart issued the writing challenge: moist.  I posted a snippet so I’d stay on track, and hell did I stay on track.  Probably OOC in places, but that hasn’t stopped me writing before :P Reno/Tifa below the cut, set very loosely in the tie between OG/Remake & AC

1 year, 4 months, 2 weeks, 3 days after The Plate

“- and then she threw me out the bar!  Literally threw me.  How is that even possible?”

“... It’s Tifa,” Rude says, as if that explains everything from gravity’s pull to the magic show of pigs suddenly sprouting wings and taking to the sky (although that wouldn’t be magic so much as fucking freaky who has the alien head this time?).  “Would’ve paid for a video,” his partner’s quiet addition, the bare bones of a smirk flirting with his mouth and Reno well - he can’t let that one go unchallenged.  The bastard doesn’t even startle when the elastic band pings off his shades.  Hmmph.

He grumbles some more, under his breath, and he’s well-versed in the feeling of eyes on him, knows Rude’s picked up on the fact he’s legitimately out of sorts with this recent development.  Knows that behind those shades, Rude’s staring at him, measuring the weight of each word on his tongue before lending voice to it.

“Either start talking or start writing.  This paperwork isn’t going to finish itself.”

“There’re memories in that bar,” Reno replies, the last he’ll say on the matter simply because it covers the entirety of his discomfiture.

~ ~ ~

7 months, 3 days after The Plate

It’s the first he’s properly laid eyes on her since... since The Plate and he slinks in like a cat on the scavenge, well aware there’s a dispute in his very near future the further in he goes, vividly aware he’s out of his depth.  He’s still got a sharp smart in his ribs to prove just how hard she punches on a bad day.  But here, now, on her turf?  Where every territorial instinct she has will be on red alert the second she clocks him?  Where every protective instinct will kick into high gear the second she recognises a threat?  He’s gonna wind up with his face smashed in and a couple teeth knocked loose and he’ll probably roll over and thank her for it after.

Better than the guilt gnawing him open from the inside out, right?

Sure enough, he’s not even singled out the quietest corner when she spots him, and because he keeps bouncing between where to sit and where’s the danger, he sees it.  The smile for her patrons vanishes so fast he might as well have smacked it off her, face settling into an expression carved from stone.  Empty.  Blank.  Carefully so, but she can’t do shit about her eyes.  They burn, even as her spine snaps straight and her chin lifts just so.

A challenge he doesn’t meet.  A challenge he can’t back down from, either.  His own issued when he approaches her directly, well and truly in the lion’s den.

“What do you want?”  She spits, and if words were acid he’d be stripped to the bone in seconds.  A lesser man would flinch, and a smarter man would leave, but neither man is him and so he slaps on a smirk and replies cool as Shiva’s kiss - he’d like a drink, if you please.  He sure as shit doesn’t imagine the creak of leather around her fists, but she’s a gracious host, and everyone’s welcome in Seventh Heaven, she can’t go around denying customers willy nilly without consequences.

He’s actually surprised when he survives that first drink, never mind the entire goddamn night.

7 months, 2 weeks, 5 days after The Plate

It’s almost a game between them a few weeks later, this animosity.  Every night he intrudes on her space and every night she’ll hiss at him like she’s ready to claw his face off.  Sometimes he’ll get blackout drunk and someone has the decency to phone Rude to cart his ass back home, sometimes he doesn’t and he’ll nurse one drink the entire night, every second under the same roof as her an agony.  When will she do it, he wonders.  When will she snap?  When will that practised calm give out in favour of confronting him?  Just what the fuck is it gonna take?

He’s not drunk tonight, just on the wrong side of tipsy, weaving one way on his stool then jerking centre and weaving the other.  Loose-lipped, too, if anyone thought to talk to him, but the suit keeps most folk at a respectable distance.  She comes at him when most of the regulars clear out and over the blast of the jukebox he thinks fuckin’ finally.

‘Cept she slams a glass of water down in front of him, sloshes some of it over his hand for good measure.  And while he swears and trips over his own tongue and waves his hand around and wipes it down with the stupid fuckin’ square Tseng always insists on cramming into his breast pocket, she parks her ass down opposite him, and jams both elbows down on the table.  There’s no warning creak this time, because her hands are bare of their usual gloves, and the fire in her eyes isn’t quite so bright tonight.

The hell?

“Why do you keep coming here, Reno?”  She asks, and if anything should catch him off guard maybe it should be that she remembers his name.  Instead, it’s her tone, the tired quality to it curling ‘round the words and robbing them of the caustic bite she usually keeps in reserve all for him.  Like she’s as weary to the bone as he is.  Like she’s beaten down and wrung out and barely hanging on by the tips of her fingers.

Like maybe - just maybe - she’s in the same boat as him.

You got snarlin’ little beasties crawling around in your head, too?

But he doesn’t ask that, it’s early days yet, right?  She’s more liable to smash the glass on his head and jab him in the eye with one of the resulting pointy bits, right?  So he looks at her instead, fighter-turned-bartender, damaged soul under all that easy charm, and lets his own trademark smirk fall just a little.  Just enough to clue her in on his little secret - I know the taste of regret, and it sure is bitter.

“To drink.  To forget.”

~ ~ ~

It doesn’t make things right between them, not by a long shot.  But the water’s her white flag, and his truth an apology.  It’s a step in some direction, maybe not the right one.

9 months, 1 week after The Plate

She asks him about it eventually, just like he knew she would.  She’s a blunt woman, Tifa, when it comes down to the nitty gritty details.  Her patience has its limits and beating around the bush as they are, tolerating one another as they are... something has to give somewhere.  So she asks him.  About it.  About The Plate.

Such a simple question, really.  Do you regret it?

Does he have an answer for it?  Oh sure, he has an answer alright.  Yes.  Yes he regrets it, every damn time he thinks about it his stomach curdles and his skin goes clammy.  So many questions circling his head ‘til he’s dizzy: was it necessary?  Was it worth it?  How many died?  How many people suffered - trapped under crushing weight, their last moments ones of terror and darkness and indescribable pain?  How many begged for help on their last breath?  How many stretched out broken hands in the hope someone beyond the rubble would grab on and help them free?  How many people ripped apart?  How many families struck from the census records in one fell swoop?  What were their names?  Their ages?  How many kids died that night?

“Yeah,” he says instead, voice wavering under all that strain locked up inside his skull, queasy and not from the food he’d ordered (still not poisoned, she’s out of her goddamn mind).  He doesn’t know what he looks like in that moment - can’t stand to look in mirrors much these days except to scrape the scruff off his chops in the morning - but she does.  Tifa looks at him then and sees whatever he can’t smother, standard Turk mask of indifference be damned, and a switch flips between them.  Animosity to understanding.

There should be surprise when she closes the bar early, promising discounts for the inconvenience, when she sets a bottle of hard liquor by his plate... and two glasses.  Instead he musters up the ghost of a smile and leans back - almost makes an ass of himself toppling right over, but hey, the reflexes have saved him from worse (like Strife’s sword) - daring to drag his eyes from her face to her waist and back up again.  “Come to confess to the big bad wolf, doll?”

“Eat a dick, Turk,” she snaps back and twists the cap open, sealing their fate.

~ ~ ~

“We, I, killed people, too... when we... blew up the Reactors.  Maybe not... maybe not every life lost was immediate but... the riots, the robberies, the people dying at home because their heating went out and never came back on again.  I don’t know how many deaths can be traced back to my hands.”

“That’s not the same as-”

“Does the how really matter, Reno?  People died.  By our actions.  By our choices.  That is the burden we bear.”

~ ~ ~

He comes awake the following morning to the unforgiving thump of a combat boot in the ribs, and bright sunlight stabbing a thousand daggers into his eyeballs, and a behemoth using his head as a chew toy.  It’s Strife above him, hands on the table he’s shoved aside to get to him, baby blues gone dark and thunderous and hell if that ain’t a safe wake-up call.  From his left somewhere a pitiful moan as Tifa rouses, and Murder Face turns his attention elsewhere, moves in her direction, giving Reno just enough space to try and get his legs under him.  Where are his legs again?  His - where the fuck’s his shoe?

“What did you do this time?”  Rude asks the second the call connects as he trips his way out the bar, and all Reno can manage without upsetting his entire lack of balance is a raspy laugh and cradling his head in his free hand.

“Made a mess, prob’ly.”

11 months, 1 week, 4 days after The Plate

“Are you asking me out?”  Really, she doesn’t need to look so suspicious.  What’s he gonna do, chuck her in a chopper and fly her across the continent?  Avalanche’d kill him deader than dead in two seconds flat.  Still, she’s not exactly wrong, which.  Yeah, okay, this isn’t one of his better ideas by far but.  Hm.

“No?  Figured it’d be a better bonding experience if we had a chat while stone cold sober, is all.  You like coffee?”

“Who doesn’t?”

“Tseng.”

Call him crazy, but her laugh sounds less hollow than he’s ever heard it.

~ ~ ~

Marlene nails him in the back of the hand with a fork and Denzel gets melon juice all down his shirt.  Accidental his ass.

At least Strife is upfront with his threats of bodily harm if he breaks Tifa’s heart.

1 year, 2 months, 3 weeks after The Plate

The next time they wind up under what he’s dubbed their table, alcohol has absolutely nothing to do with it...  Well.  Except for the sticky residue he can taste on her fingers.

He has enough common sense to make sure they drag their asses upstairs and to her bedroom before dawn.  Enhanced senses must suck balls, though, because when Strife drops by the following afternoon he doesn’t even bat an eye at Reno’s perch at the bar (munching away at the remnants of a fruit salad the brats didn’t take to school), but he does when he gets closer and breathes.  His nose scrunches up as he sniffs in Reno’s direction like a dog - or that snarling wolf emblem he’s so fond of slapping on anything he can get his hands on - and darts those baby blues between his shit-eating grin and Tifa raised brow.  Try me, that look says, complete with the casual gathering of her hair into a high ponytail, the flex of her fingers after it.  Do they smell of each other, then?  How cute.

“... I don’t even wanna know,” Strife eventually says, and Reno laughs.

1 year, 4 months, 2 weeks, 3 days after The Plate

The punch she lands smack on his left pectoral is a love tap compared to what she’s capable of, and instead of the fire he’s half-expecting there’s... mischief in her gaze.

“Tifa -”

“Never say that word in my bar again, Reno, or I’ll ban you permanently.”

“Yes Ma’am, lesson learned.”

“I might even ban Rufus, too.  Make sure the lesson really sticks.”

“Aw naw, c’mon!  That’s hitting below the belt!”

“Please.  We both know you’d be sobbing on the floor if I did that.”

He pouts (she does have a point).  Tifa laughs.  It’s fast becoming his most favourite sound in the world.

[2kultra]

On the psych ward

Wake up

Fog from the medications

Sedated last night

For acting out

Breathe in

Push down rough olive green blanket

Step onto the cold floor of the observation room

A camera in the corner across from your bed

Nurses outside 24/7

Peek out of room

Morning meds are called

Shuffle into line behind 5 or 6 other people

Everyone gets mouth checked to make sure they're not cheeking

Throwing small paper cups into the trashcan as they finish

Zyprexa, ativan, antidepressant, can't remember which

Breakfast is on the unit

Middle aged man in an apron rolls in the blue plastic cupboard full of breakfast in styrofoam contaners

Paper bag full of juice and milk on top

The styrofoam boxes are handed out by name

And as we eat, the officer shows up to take people to court

Hands against the wall, lock up your hands and feet, off in the car you go

And for those of us that stay on the unit

Group time

Clinician sitting in a chair in the dayroom

Patients sprawled out on the hard, vinyl cushion padded couches and chairs

Check in

Are we safe today

Let's get started

As I eagerly wait for the doctor to pull me into the consultation room

Gonna ask for my release date

Group is about mindfulness

And while everyone works on staying in the moment

My eyes dart from side to side of the white room

And then to the nurse standing at the door with a clipboard

Still can't shake the delusions

Because I know she is in with the bad guy somehow

Mindfulness

Paying close attention to what you are seeing, feeling, hearing, tasting

And back in the good old days, they let you have cigarette breaks

Go "outside"

Aka a giant concrete room with a no windows and a ventilation system installed. A door on the other side leads to the courtyard. A picture of a ship sailing towards an island is painted on the wall.

In line, again

You get your cigarette and light it with the lighter that has a tongue depressor taped to it with "unit" scrawled in black marker on the side

Put it back in the plastic tub

And sit down wherever you choose to position yourself

In the sill of the blacked out obs room window was my favorite

But I also enjoyed sitting on the ground

Or at the picnic tables

To listen to a woman explain how I am her long lost daughter

And to learn how to light a cigarette that went out with the tip of another

Or discussing the psych tech on duty

These days you get a nicotine patch or gum

So you get the nicotine without the satisfaction or memories

It sucks

Anyways, back inside for some free time

So again, I get in line

For the phone

And try to ignore the heated and bizarre conversation the current patient is having about being sent here to die

It goes on for awhile, and I want to pace the halls, but I would lose my place in line

Finally, I reach the phone

I pull out a small folded up sheet of notebook paper with numbers on it

Dial down the list until someone picks up

And feign excitement and hope to try to make conversation

The phone and the news we're what you depended on to stay connected to the outside world

Speaking of, the news is on as I hang up the phone

I go into the tv room and sit on what might be the most uncomfortable chair ever

A young women walks in with one of the rough green blankets draped around her

And we both have the blue hospital socks with the white grip lines

She is wearing paper scrubs and has wet hair

She sips her got chocolate and we sit in silence until she tells me that she can see the devil in me

There was an awkward silence

I didn't know what to think, and I was too tired to form a response

Gonna go lay down

And I am laying face down with my hands crossed in front of my body and squished under my weight

Forcing my eyes closed

And somewhere between a dream and eavesdropping on a conversation in the hall, lunch is called

Lunch is off the unit, so again, we line up

Psych tech unlocks the metal door

And leads us across the way to the cafeteria

The food is so good, I can feel myself getting fatter

Even if it's just a sandwich and chips

Instead of the entree

I don't care

Zyprexa makes me hungry

I have seconds

And after lunch, we go back to the unit

Checked to make sure we didn't bring back utensils

And then finally my doctor shows up for me

Been waiting forever

And as he pulls me into the consultation room I prepare to ask for my release date

"We are looking at at least another week"

And then everything else seemed less important

At least another week

Where the days blend together into this bizarre dream in this world of confinement and rigid rules

"Any questions for me today?" He asks

"No. Thanks."

And back to the day room I go

Devil girl is nowhere to be seen

Thank god

Occupational therapist comes in

And puts on the kid gloves to do crafts with us

And try to teach us how to cope

And of course the exercise group

Chair yoga this week? Yeah, lame

I sleep through it after a second dose of ativan

And wake up to another smoke break

My favorite friend there was a big man in a wheelchair

He was schizophrenic and he always talked to me

"When I die, I'm gonna come back an eagle. I'll fly across the sky and shit on all these motherfuckers" he says

And also talks about passing the time by counting the cinder blocks in the wall

Whatever helps

A girl with a black hoodie, a messy bun, and a weathered face says "the best thing about time is that it doesn't go backwards"

I'll remember that forever, though I didn't know it at the time

A man on the patio who has been eyeballing me since I heard his phone conversation finally approaches me

He asks if I am here to kill him, to which I say no

I am so medicated that life feels like a dream

And as we line up to go inside from the smoke break, I am called to the nurses station

Another dose of zyprexa

And I am at my limit

The fog in my mind takes over

And I am out cold

Somehow back in my bed

Somehow feeling peace

And somehow, I stay asleep until about a minute before we were to line up for dinner

Devil girl was in line, and rather than risk an encounter in the cafeteria, I ask if I can eat on the unit

"Sure" they say

And so I am sent another sandwich

In a styrofoam container

And I watch a movie as I eat it

I couldn't tell you what movie, but it somehow transformed into a narrative of my life

And I could hear peoples encoded messages to me

Among the other lines in the movie

Transfixed, I eat my sandwich mindlessly and messily

And focus with all my might on the mental image of a right triangle that was carved into one of the picnic tables

It was a sign of 3 things I had to do to be released

And this ignites something in me

So i proceed to tear through the collection of paperback books in the art room, writing on pages, reading passages aloud

My horoscope said "time flies like fruit flies" according to the paper

I rip my horoscope out and keep it in my pocket

And as I reach the peak of my madness, searching and making a mess,

A psych tech appears in the doorway with my mother and my husband

Visitor hour

And so I try to think of how I could ask them for help with the right triangle

So i can get out

The psych tech pulls me away from my visitors momentarily

For another dose of something, I didn't know what that time

I want to say it was just more zyprexa

As she had seen me tearing up the art room

And I go back to my mother and husband

Who have brought me a snack

And we talk about nothing

For about 15 minutes

Before I find myself laying on the floor

Overcome by the meds

They walk me past the nurses station to my room

And help me into bed

A nurse brings me my trazodone

And the rest is a blur of voices and noises

And with the obs camera watching i gently drift off

Maybe I'll ask to move into one of the regular rooms down the hall tomorrow

[velathetanager]

Child’s Play

Chapter 8: Revealing 

It's been three days. Why haven't they dropped this? Delly asked Isa.

I guess because I’m an only child. 

Do you want to do a loop?

Nah, the ceiling’s too low.

Okay. Delly would have pouted if he could. I wish I could move around. It's scary not being able to move.

I could leave the room

I'd appreciate it.

She waited until everyone was distracted and left the room.

Delly stretched. "You know, you never did explain why that one guy was afraid of me."

“Which one? Uncle Pancakes?”

"Yeah. All I did was put his hammer at the site. I didn't hit him with it or anything."

“No, I’ll show you,” She got a movie from one of the shelves called Child’s Play. 

"A movie? Do you want popcorn?"

“Yeah,” she put the movie in. Not long into the movie, Delly realized why Pancakes was scared of him.

He flinched when Chucky was set on fire. "...That looks painful. You know I wouldn't do that to you, right, Isa?"

“Yeah. But the others don’t know,”

"It isn't fair," the doll pouted. "And I can't prove it because some of then don't believe!"

“Kind of hard to believe, even in this kind of world. Roseflame would likely believe.”

"I checked some memories. How is an evil eyeball, a reality warper cartoon, and a dragon lady believable but I'm not?" Delly whined.

“Because nothing like you has existed yet. Come on, let’s go find Roseflame! I’ll be like an adventure that the others talk about having,”

"I hope she believes."

“She should, There was several living dolls in our world.” 

"Cool," Delly grinned, sitting on her shoulder. 

Meanwhile, Intelligent was looking over the video feed from Jennifer's fight. "Yeah, it does seem pretty incriminating. At the very least she isn't human." 

“Look at the ground. The blood there isn’t the same color,” Pancakes pointed out. 

"I've noticed. Of course, she can chalk that up to bad editing. If she really is Hero, she's good at keeping it on the down low."

“Yeah, let’s hope none of her enemies notice this. Ya know. Besides Brutal.”

"Two-Face still has it out for her after that thing with Grave. Didn't she fry him?"

“I think so,”

"I'm still thinking about what Gentle said about that doll," Spyper commented. "Alive my a**."

“I dunno, I saw some freaky sh*t in Slender Fortress,”

"Like Chucky?" Intelligent asked, switching to a document to take notes.

“Yeah. I think he was on- no. That was the ‘winter’ pack as Roseflame called them,”

Spyper shrugged. "She would know. Think it's evil?"

“I dunno, Isa isn’t dead yet,”

"To be fair, Chucky never wanted to kill Andy if I remember right."

“I dunno, I hate watching that movie.”

"Gentle is convinced it's like that movie."

“Yeah. I just don’t know what to think. It’s one eye turns red at me,”

"It tried to frame you, so I don't think it's fond of you," Spyper quipped.

“Yeah. And I know Rudra ain’t a huge fan of me. I was afraid she was gonna snap me like a twig,”

"She scares almost everyone. That one Scout wasn't too worried about her." 

"That Scout gets on my nerves," hissed Spyper. There was a knock at the chapel door. "Special delivery for an A** Pancakes?"

Pancakes walked up to the door and retrieved his package.

Inside was enough Bonk to make a soda lover faint and a small paper with a blue smiley face drawn on it.

“Maybe the doll ain’t as evil as I thought,”

Delly stared at the Winged Star. "That thing looks funny."

“Her mode of transport is here, but she isn’t,” Isa looked around the woods. “Maybe it’ll take us to her!”

"Wait, is it alive?"

“It’s a portal, but it always acts like it’s mind is connected to Roseflame’s. It’s hard to explain,”

"...and a living doll is hard to believe," Delly groaned. 

The Star took the pair to Roseflame, and Delly froze up.

Wait, if she'd believe, why am I frozen?

She doesn’t know you yet.

That's fair.

“Isa? What are you doing out here by yourself?” “I’m not by myself,” Roseflame looked at Delly for a moment. “Why are you two out here by yourselves?” 

Delly was unfrozen. "Isa told me you would believe."

“Well yeah. The question is why are you two out in the wilderness. You two can’t defend yourselves,”

Delly frowned. "Excuse me?"

“I’m out hunting. One of the monsters got loose again. Trust me you two would be dead in seconds,”

Delly scoffed. "I'll take you home, Isa," he said, picking her up via telekinesis.

A creature let out a paralyzing screech. “There he is,”

Delly stared. "What is that?!?"

Roseflame pulled out her Atomizer and waited for the creature to attack her directly. “Come on out Rake!” 

"Yeah, that's our cue to leave," Delly decided. 

Isa was paralyzed. “Isa, stay close. No sudden movements,”

Delly froze up, eyes glowing bright red.

The Rake tried to go for Isa only for Roseflame to pull her close, pulling out her winger and attacking the Rake.

Delly noted that Isa was scared. Calm down, Isa, we got you.

Roseflame picked up Isa and hopped on the Winged Star. “Now would be the time to prove yourself,”

Delly grinned. "Sure thing," he said, 

 A few minutes later, the three returned to the chapel.

Roseflame cursed a bit. “I’ll have to go back and get him. Before he causes any damage,” she then walked into the Chapel. “Hey Jester! Your child went for a little adventure!”

"What kind of adventure?" they called, flying down to the first floor.

“A ‘lets go find this person and get ourselves in life threatening danger’ adventure,” 

Delly's eyes flashed red. Not our fault!

She has a point. Roseflame, because she was the first to escape, now has to be the anchor of the two worlds. Which means that if a creature escapes, she has to capture it.

That's too bad. Wait, why didn't you mention this earlier?

I honestly thought she’d have things under control.

"Life th- What the hell happened!?" Jester gasped, scooping Isa up and checking her for wounds.

“My guess is she wanted to see if I knew anything about her doll, so she went to me because we both come from the same world. Unfortunately Rake got out an hour or so ago,”

"THE RAKE!?"

“She’s fine. But yeah.. He got out, I figured I’d return her back home before I finally captured him. Prevent accidents,”

Jester looked ready to have a heart attack.

“... Let’s sit you down before your sugar habits catch up to you,”

What's the matter? I got it away from you, right? Why are they scared?

Parental instincts and knowing how close I was to danger without them knowing.

Delly would have shrugged. Okay.

"What's going on down there?" Pure questioned, coming down the stairs.

“I’ll explain when Jesters heart rate goes down,”

Delly noticed Brutal and Gentle there, and as Isa was tended to by Jester, he fixed them with a red-eyed stare. When Gentle noticed this, he threatened the doll with a knife and a voodoo fall he had in his pocket.

The stare didn't change except for the glow dimming somewhat. However, Delly did decide it was appropriate to say, "Back in France!"

RED paused, looking up. “That’s not the full line! That doll is trying to talk!” 

"It looks damaged," Intelligent noted. "Probably a voice box malfunction."

“Didn’t Rudra say it’s just stuffing inside it?”

"Yeah. She also said there was energy coming off it. Maybe the energy functions as a voice box."

“Maybe...” Delly could tell that RED believed he was alive.

After a brief second, the eye glow returned to its original brightness. Spyper looked at it. "I wonder what it would say to me." 

Delly seemed to hesitate. "That Sniper's a Spy!"

"Eh, I mean, that works," decided the Freak. 

Spyper picked up the doll and put him in front of RED, and Delly snarled, "You snake!" When he faced Delly towards Brutal, the doll said, "That there just ain't the place you oughta be standin'!" 

The eye glow seemed to brighten.

"Well, he clearly doesn't like you," Spyper said, tossing Delly back to Isa.

Isa nearly dropped him but Roseflame caught him and handed him back to Isa.

I don't think I like that guy.

Which one? Spyper, RED, Gentle, or Brutal?

That Spyper. Being thrown is terrifying! 

Delly dropped the topic, though, in favor of going back to staring at Brutal, Gentle, and RED.