#except i didnt look at a good ref of it

[hypnosis-microsys]

HI-FU-MIIII

-doppochin-

[vhvrs]

needed a more accurate ref sheet for these two so u r looking at that!!!! simplified some details to be less overly complex n tightened up the palettes in the process

additionally comments including previous info i dont wanna link to and way too much world info:

as b4, rick is a normal human. morticia is a half-witch - jerry is the witch bloodline in question (agony to rick bc he was hoping this was a verse beth DIDNT marry jerry when he found out). witches live in a kindve attached dimension to earth. magic shit. he likes collecting witch literature bc theyre so fucking weird n usually infused w weird magic.

rick is v nice by rick standards n also a major creep lol. the medical shit does weird most ricks out n also they think hes a pussy for caring so much abt kerping morticia safe n sane (except for x-143 on both 😘)

ricks science tends to focus on biology n hes REALLY excited by medical procedures n discovering how different soecies function. he does regular rick shit on occasion but hes kindve too lazy n comfortable to do shit morticia isnt up for too. hashtag most normal rick. used to be more dickish but he got humbled fast by the world lol. they do bicker like regular rick n mortys though. still very much has the capacity to be a normal rick if provoked.

these two are in an oc verse i have too much lore for so i could really go on all day abt the specifics but to be vague witches are a subrace of things called shadows. considered humans while humans are considered mortals. lifespans are expanded. harder to kill. witches even half witches typically have grey skin too but i needed morticia to be visibly herself. witches are the only shadows who can do magic from birth, while other shadows (its pretty much just witches, fae folk, and deathwalkers/normie supernaturals) have to learn it n usually HAVE to use channeling devices like wands while witches use their hands. magic users typically have an element they naturally are good at n can learn others - these other elements are usually what wands are for.

public displays of magical scars is considered like. uncouth. even the hand ones, thus gloves are a societal default and otherwise ur supposed to cover up or charm evidence away. rick obviously does not give a shit n it makes him stand out a LOT more than he should. bc of this, morticia is a lot more comfy around him n more confident as a result. ricks also the only person whos seen her hands ungloved bc of needing to patch her up after backfired adventures. highly personal thing in witch culture etc.

as the last scarring is also considered improper to show off bc 'only non-witches fuck up magic enough to get scarred' witches are v high-society pretentious types, usually high in the government etc. other shadows dont give a shit lol.

scars in question are all from morticias electricity magic kindve exploding on them during a really high stress situation. yewouch!

uh oh morticia goes to a mage academy. public educations kinda meh among shadows but witches have fancy magic schools. full-time magic users are called mages (pc term bc witches used to just claim it b4 other ppl started doing magic too) bc everythings complicated w shadows.

[howlonomy]

Decided to just go ahead and uh... show a comparison of every battle redraw I did using your designs?

For all but the last two, the top one is your design and the bottom one is the actual in game design, I included the nm! vs. dtm! Clovers as well since they fit the theme.

I tried to include them all on one giant image, but it. Was not loading. If possible I MAY try and send it through a reblog, but it will just be all nine of those side by side so it may be hard to see.

Out of all of these, I'd say that the one with your Star design is my favorite because he looks so much more vibrant and somehow cool despite being the most pathetic man in existence (affectionate)

Also, don't know if it'll show as what they're all called if you tried to download them, but each one is the name of their theme, with the only exception being Geno Dalv since it was taken by Pacifist Dalv, so instead it has a play on words that I'm very proud of

I think I remember seeing you hint at a possible Feisty Four ref sheet, so if that is true then I will remake the ones I have for them as well

YEAHAHHH THESE ALL LOOK AWESOME!! i didnt realize how different they would look next to each other!!

i made stars outfit way more complicated than it was bc. i love complicated designs filled with details. he may look cool but please know he trips over his own spurs constantly AHJDKS

BUT THESE WERE SO FUN TO SEE COME IN AND THEY ALL LOOK REALLY GOOD!!!

[asmogorna]

Sorry to send another ask so soon (and idk if someones asked this already) but if you have any headcanons for Jon I'd love to hear them!

OK SO im really sorry it took me THIS long to get to this i quite literally.. forgot i had smth in my inbox woopsies. the reason i remembered is cause mootie posted some Spine hcs and i was like "woah"

alsooo im not good at putting my thoughts onto "paper" especially in english so you will have to excuse me

anywho my jon headcanons some sad some random /ref

First of all i think that his relationship with Peter Walter I would be far from close. he would be seen as the type of child who's both "too much mess to take care of" and "strong enough to take care of himself" if that makes sense. Peter did love him as his creation but would openly admit that he's not his proudest one, meanwhile Jon wouldn't feel much connection at all. he sympathized with his creator but only in a way he would with any other human being, there was more gratitude than love

Jon struggles with constant malfunctions and his mechanisms are a mess (partially because he gets himself in trouble all the time), so at one point Peter would get tired of fixing him so frequently, and tell him that he can just "walk some things off". That thought stuck to the bot and he would think of all of his malfunctions as slight inconveniences, i mean, he can still perform so why pay attention to the constant neck pain or powering up struggles ? it just became a habit and he kind of forgot that things like that shouldn't be ignored

After a long while when Peter Walter VI grew up enough to start learning more about how automatons work, Jon would be used as a "lab rat" (not really but its just what he himself called it) for young VI to practice fixing mechanisms. thats pretty much when he heard "Wait this cant be right" about his messed up physical state for the first time in a long while. little Peter didnt get to fix all of the things that were wrong with Jon's body, but he did manage to take care of some of them, which almost surprised Jon with how nice it felt to not hear pieces of broken gears rattle in his head every time he moved (who wouldve thunk)

ok now to more lighthearted stuff !!

Jon actually has a very strong bond with Sam ! He loves watching the mustached man work and sometimes follows him around, just enjoying his company. At first Sam thought that the tone-gold automaton was creepy and uncanny, but grew attached to him and his stupidity (/lh). i also think that Sam would be one of the few Walter workers who dont baby the Jon and actually treat him like they would treat any other robot :3

Also Jon just loves his robot family endlessly. shocker !! im not sure how explain it but i think hes the only one to look at other Walter automatons and go "bro i love them so much" at all times. in his head at least. obviously he teases them and argues with them but he wont think twice before accepting a hug from his siblings (except for Upgrade theyre rivals /j)

Speaking of Upgrade !! They feel the most sibling-ish to me (aside from Rabbit & The Spine) because they constantly poke fun at each other yet they still are willing to give each other help and comfort when needed. She once had to carry him all the way back to the Walter manor because they forgot to take some extra cans of crystal pepsi

Also Upgrade got in an accident once which caused her to have a fractured face for a couple of days, and Jon was there the entire time to comfort her and constantly tell her that shes still very pretty

Unlike with other robots, the food that Jon eats doesnt just fall through his uncovered jaw/run into his boiler or anything like this, instead it just. disappears. once he closes his mouth the food just vanishes into the unknown, yet Jon claims that he enjoys the process of "eating" (nobody knows how it works)

LITTLE GIRLS THAT GO TO SPG SHOWS LOVE HIM !! once the band finishes performing, he constantly gets pulled away by a small giggling pink-ish blob to join their tea party or hula hooping contest. thats why he has quite a knowledge on "girly" themes and educates other automatons on the matter

THATS IT FOR NOW TY FOR READING :3

[thatdeadaquarius]

OP your addtion about the Harbinger's reaction? Sent me wheezing to the moon 🤣🤣💀

I dont have any additions to Teyvat language yet (other anons have a more in depth explanations while mine is just shitposts wheEZE--) but I did have an idea for a Genshin AU.

I'm pretty sure everybody has heard about the blue alien people Avatar. Tribal people from another planet. (Also I just stumbled upon the forests of Sumeru while going through Chasm quests. The one that has giant mushrooms).

Imagine Genshin in the Avatar Au. Sumeru can be based on the first movie (It fits cause from what I can explore of Sumeru reminds me of the time I watched Avatar of the first time. Pure awe and wonder..) While the Water nation can be based on the 2nd movie, Hoyoverse hasnt released the name of the Water Country yet so we're just waiting. Mondstadt can be based on the upcoming 3rd (4th or 5th? Idk they had it lined up) movie that involves being high above the clouds. Kind of like the Jade palace or the Floating Abode in the serenitea pot.

Its all I could base for now since the other movies dont have that much info yet to be paired with Genshin's countries.

Bonus idea that randomnly popped into my head:

Still going with this Au but its sagau themed. Creator!Reader arrives to Teyvat and is considered as Eywa

NOW THIS

THIS IS AN ✨️IDEA✨️

I just want u to know i feel b l e s s e d that u put this in MY ask box , when this coulda been a whole post of ur own 💖💖🙏🙏

WARNING: So i havent seen the new movie, just the og Avatar one, and i totally loved that concept about Eywa and how their world works so ill refresh myself but if theres any new lore from the 2nd movie i aint got it yet 💁 srry babs

🎵 FROM THE DAY WE ARRIVED ON THE PLANEETTT

AND STEPPED OUT BLINKING INTO THE SUN

AND THE SUN ROSE HIGH IN A SAPPHIRE SKY

ITS THE CIRRRRCCCLLLEEE OF LIFFFFEEEE 🎵

^ except ur like the life itself bc ur god now

Thats why i put that there

This AU radiates that energy

♤

BRO I TOTALLY FORGOT ABT U MENTIONIMG THE COOL CHASM STUFF AND PICKED THAT GIF ALL ON MY OWN

BC I THOUGHT IF ANYTHING LOOKS LIKE EYWA TREE IN GENSHIN ITS THAT BEAUTIFUL MUSHROOM GOD

ANYWAYS-

So I accidentally posted this too early so keep refreshing or coming back bc if theres no "♡the beloveds♡" im still updating this then LMAO

SRRY GUYS

So anon's a genius and i could listen to u talk about this all day

I fucking love combining world building or lore together

Esp like making one the AU or just the setting like u said with Avatar worlds as settings and same characters-

EEEEEE U ARE EYWA- YESSSSS YESSSSSS I AM YOUR GOD BITCHES!!! SUCK ON MY BIG FAT MAN TIDDIES BITCHES RAHHHHH /REF

♧

So they deffo use "Eywa" as a term for you instead of your name

Honestly, before when u were a mysterious af planet creature thing (lets say u get isekaied there i mean)

Nobody rlly knew if u even could take a mortal form or even thought of that as a concept

I feel like the younger generations immortals and Teyvat's current countries kinda think of you Eywa as more of a passive entity life force thing

Rather than the older immortals and creatures that had seen thru eons or over the course of a couple thousand years

That u were very aware and intelligent

Not that ur energy or aura didnt tell them that alone

◇

So a little deeper into the Teyvat lore here but i dont see anybody else talking about it so I will

Originally, it was the Seven Sovriegns and you, and eventually Phanes and their Four Shades,

And they literally all quickly came to realize u literally made this planet and began to start the first traditions of worshipping you!

Like putting gifts or hand made goods at the base

(Ppl have also gotten a tradition from Morax/Rex Lapis and Guizhong and other adepti to leave birthday letters to offer you, which ties into what i say below⬇️)

Ya know,

Eywa the tree could even be a sort of source to the eyes of Teyvat of what you look like while u were playing the game

Like how Eywa's little jellyfish reach ppl in the forest and shit? I think?

So like i would imagine that whatever u make certain vessels or acolytes do most often, is what they think they should offer u :0

◇

Claymore users give u gemstones and ores

Bow users give u hunted game like fowl, or the treasure from puzzles that required arrows (like those bursting blue balloons?)

Catalysts and Polearms give u all kinda of crazy shit lmao

Bc they can be used for a vareity of things

◇

Bc of ur player status and abilities, people of Teyvat attribute a gain in power or talents or whatnot to you, Eywa

So say u actually physically there now, and u just wake up under the coolest sickest tree youve ever seen in ur life

Omg could u imagine????

Seeing Teyvat irl? But AVATAR WORLD IRL???!!!

You would stand there lookin around like a drunk fuck for like 20 minutes, maybe longer lmao

Its just so ✨️pretty✨️ here

Also the tree itself just feels like, the equivalent to ur bedroom basically but like specifically if it was hella comfy and like just the way u want it (all the decor is up, the floor is clean, u got like hot choco on ur desk, theres a candle burning, etc.)

♤

Oh so since ur like weirdly connected to the land, like u know how theres a voice line abt walking in that glowing aranara part of Sumeru and ur steps light up?

I saw that too in the OG avatar movie

So i feel like u would have a map with ALLLLL the peoples on it and little icons

U can focus on just vision users or bosses or big nature things like Dragonspine

◇

Oh so Eywa can control all animals and whatnot and so u as a mortal person can too

So anytime theres a threat u can deadass just become a pokemon trainer LMAO

Ok but think how badass it would be to just like,

Get the Primo Geovishap or Giant Bird Jadeplume Terror thingy to just leave their territory and wipeout some mfs

(coughunknowngodasomodaycough)

It would be fucking amazing

♧

Unrelated to above bc im just spitting out ideas srry guys

but like

I feel like if u were a lifeforce sort of ancient eldritch god for the entire goddamn continent of Teyvat let alone the whole planet-

You would have to maintain said continent/planet

Like, make sure the Irminsul is growing okay, protect from mfs like Dottore,

Stop diasters if ur Eywa too, esp bc u can hear prayers now, and would hear ppl crying out to help them geez

while the prayers of the many kinda just glob together to form the major "feeling" of the prayer for most creatures,

Vision users, gods, ancient creatures u can get their exact sentences

Basically more magic = better heard to connect with u

◇

Oh u know, i could even see it being even more manual or personal labor bc ur not like a tree connected to ur roots thruout the world technically

Like if volcanoes erupt in Natlan, the archon and gods there help and u r also wanted/needed in person for it to work

U would still be powerful, but yeah like say the tree was u just playing genshin before,

The game automatically regulated diasters and stuff other than what was supposed to happen in game

◇

So kinda bouncing off that I read smwhere that the Na'vi dont actually view Eywa as like omnipotent or omniscient

(like the God™️ from the Christian bible for a example of what your not)

And also! Dont blame/attribute natural diasters, plagues, or other bad stuff on Eywa

So good for you whew 💦

Ur actually supposed to kinda just be the collective lifeforce or Teyvat/world and nature, and a defender and guide of life :0

Which kinda fits with the whole "upgrading characters" thing actually

◇

Okay but I saw somewhere in SAGAU tag someone did another name instead of Creator to spice it up and its "All-Mother"

And interestingly, Eywa in Avatar is also called that and "Great Mother"!!

How fun :0

Also, the reason Eywa still got people with free-will is bc they kinda described the relationship to Eywa being something like a mother or parent

Maybe where name/titles came from ig?

Either way, ppl be calling u all types of nicknames u aint heard before lmao

I mean ur sacred, they dont just say ur name,

Nobody knows ur real name or what u call yourself

Just what they call u

Bc they couldnt communicate with u super well before, (the bday letters were the closest they got verbally, and even then they had to be addressed somewhat to ur first vessel the traveler to get thru/be seen)

Otherwise yeah u operating them lets say before on Earth you rlly felt like an eldritch nature deity 💀

Cause u guide them in battles, strengthen their talents and skills and bodies, and feed them food

If they were in battle like needing healing food, u help them heal by consuming it for them so they dont have to take a snack break in battle and

Let me tell u, these denizens of Teyvat who have to constantly deal with magic and monsters and abyss stuff, so a stroll outside ur house gets u in a fight...

...They are very grateful for that needless to say.

Plus i like to think u make fighting easier on them bc ur "guiding" their bodies

◇

Anyway thats a long winded way to say, help me think of all the names Teyvat's given you lmao:

Eywa

All-Mother / Great Mother

All-Father / Great Father

All-Parent? / Great Parent

Creator

Their Grace

Great Puppeteer

The Puppeteer

Soul of Teyvat

Greatest Soul

☆

She aint long bc im not that creative and this idea has sm potential too😔

I would love to be Eywa sounds fun and powerful af and i dont get expected to be Jesus and they know i dont cause the natural diasters, like that sounds nice

Aight im no genius and this writing feels like im just rambling like a drunk guy sittin on the sidewalk mumbling to myself, i had to stop writing 💀

Like that energy specifically-

So lmk if yall got any other cool titles or names :0

I couldn't think of anymore :/

Also srry about the updating this post and making u check back in if u already read this before i put the taglist

(Me putting the taglist means im done editing/writing this dw if u seein this)

Cheers,

🌒🌧🌊Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

♡my beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

[deathzgf]

( almost ) ALL MY AMREV + FREV WIPS ( 12 october - 5 november 2023 ) ! ! ! ! !

WARNING : long ass post jFDSFLKJSLF ( will all be under the cut )

NOTE : not everything is here ! a lot of my amrev + frev drawings are doodles ive done in class ( which i cant find ) + i Do Not Like a lot of them + Tumblr only allows so many images T___T

ah yes . . . the doodle that started it all . . . my good omens sona in the french revolution ! except i had no idea what i was doing at ALL and had no historical context ! which i now do have and it makes me ENRAGED for how good omens handled that era . . . why are they in the bastille in 1793 . . . ANYWAYS ! YEAH !

aaand because of that doodle , i researched frev fashion ! and guess what ! that robespierre fashion video came up ! wooo robespierre ! and then this was the first fucking thing i drew of him i cant . I WAS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW THE FUCK HE MISSED SO BAD + HOW THE BULLET WOULD LOOK

BECAUSE after that i drew this ! pookie ! ! !

first saint just drawing . i was listening to angel with a shotgun on loop . . . and i thought . . . angel with a guillotine . . . get it cuz hes . hes angel of the terror . and . and . a

i dont have any explanation for this

i hate this . but first robespierre AND saint just drawing wahoo

first frev oc except the hair on that one drawing is red because i went back and changed it cuz i made their name Jules Le Roux and . You know . Red hair . yeah

jules and calixte ! ! ! calixte is @toastytrusty ' s oc and my sweet sweet little baby i love them dearly

. . . saint just doodle i forgor to come back to

JULES AND CALIXTE LORE

miku binder robespierre

saint just painting robespierres nails because :3

WE INTO THE AMREV NOW WOOO . anyways me when ive married and icarus and hes flown too close to the sun lol ( his wings are meant to be burning letters btw . yeah )

jules , calixte , and leonard interaction ! ! ! ! !

which didnt go well

this turned out gayer than intended i genuinely dont know what happened here

i wanted to continue this so bad but i fucking forgot about it but Uhhh uhhhhh uhhh

you know those vamp ! robespierre and vamp hunter ! saint just aus ? yeah

PLEASE STOP SAYING IT LOOKS LIKE A DICK IVE NEVER DRAWN A VIOLIN BEFORE PLEASE LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE . anyways he playsss theee violinnn he tucks it right underr hisss chinnnnn

winning the idgaf war . unbothered . living his best life

theres a storytime for this drawing but ill save that for later . john adams ( 2008 ) scene redraw but instead of jefferson grabbing adams elbow its his waist except it looks awful and i need to redo it soo baddd

vamp ! robespierre and saint just ( ? ? ? i guess vamp hunter ! saint just cuz thats usually what goes with vamp ! robespierre but idk man ) . they were meant to be on like some moonlit picnic or some shit but then class ended and i forgor about this

donald trump , alexander hamilton , and thomas jefferson . need i say more ?

the ORIGINAL toxic doomed yaoi ( hamburr )

burr . boobies :3

that one scene from saint just et la forces des choses BUT AGAIN this turned out gayer than intended . why do they keep doing this

hey girl i think theres something wrong with your leg

semi modern band ! gay trio . . . thing . . . ? girl idk . but i gave up

making jules a proper ref ! who cheered !

AAAND THATS IT !

let me know if . you want me to finish any of these because otherwise theyre probably going to rot in my gallery HELP

[night-error]

So I had spare time and I decided to draw my oc and Iris (why iris? He is the only caretaker i can draw without a ref-)

Random oc ranting below the cut

Soooo yeah, also just for context. My oc was born not pure but also not a corrupt, making her the first neutral shape on paradise. Her chest marking is the corrupted symbol but its a light purple corronding to her hair. This idea was actually original as I've never seen an oc like her ig. She is also a species of monster called "titan" ..im trying to find a better name. I promise. Its also why she looks humanish. Okay, back to the point about her being a neutral shape. She doesn't fear the corruption as for her to get corrupted it has to break through her skin so a slap won't do unless it tears off at least 1 layer of skin. Same with burns! They ONLY exception to this is corrupted water. It can corrupt her within a few seconds. Besides from that, she thinks the corruption is beautiful, since it is very different from everything she was told. Seeing corruptions who share the same chest marking make her feel alot more welcomed in corrupted areas. She feels alot more safer.

Also in my au, my oc was born during the first part of the pink corruption and had to be looked after by iris (her mom died. Same with her dad-) . They are distant cousins in my au and my oc has no other relatives (for the time being). During the first pink corruption thing iris was corrupted but his corruption would refuse to cause harm to her, since the pure side of iris's mindset was only set on protecting her and not harming her. Iris also does her hair. I know it isn't important but I believe iris being good at doing hair is a nice hc honestly. I also hc that he has a flower garden (I will probably draw it sooner or later) back to the main idea tho, iris only wanted to protect her from dub and probably the king of land of the Spheers since he might kill her for being corrupt like. She was kept a secret until iris met the big circles (Cirtunda, Circumuscle, Rincle and a new born spheer. Spheer is only 2 weeks older than her). They offered to help teach iris how to look after my oc and yeah. She basically lived there with iris and the big circles. Until iris moved away with pentellow, my oc was heartbroken but she had to let him go at some point (she is 7 at this point). Iris would always visit about, 43-67 times per year. Until pentellow was a caretaker, so it shortened too 23-33 times a year. Then when iris became a caretaker, only about 2-4 times. This upset her but she accepted it and just got on with life, she only cried once when iris didn't appear for Christmas like he promised. And yeah.

My Oc's name is Nightterror BTW. (It was originally ment to be pigment but Nightterror sounded more bada$$)

I promise the iris in my au isn't a d!ck he's just very overwhelmed and busy.

My oc is also a caretaker, her hero didnt come from a tree of life. But thats a rant for another day.

[mynameisnotsoda]

Lore dumping my fnaf au

I just remembered that I inserted myself and my best friend into the au for funsies (you'll notice I do that a lot. This is how cringe I am)

In my first draft I went on a rant abt how much I hated Wilbur's face but after going back to fix it I just needed to add his glasses LMAO. Initially I forgot about the face paint until I stared at my ref LMAO it's supposed to look faded and I think I did a pretty damn good job

Other than that the rest is fine. Erm. I didn't think I'd yap so much about that the actual lore is below the cut lawl

This is Maya!!!! (she/they) she's the mechanic in the pizzaplex, is addicted to caffeine, and is my bestest friend !!!!!! In the au we live together and also work at the same place that's so funny ‼️‼️

They usually work the night shift but if there needs to be emergency repairs during the day they're always on call for that. Nights usually consist of checkups and clean up of the animatronics and androids (will get into that later).

Clearly, I have a favorite, so he's also my favorite in the au itself LMAO cSoda works in the daycare but often leaves to bother the animatronics ☝️☝️‼️‼️

the daycare has an art station so that's where they work, they also help clean up and watch over the kids with the daycare androids !!! Who are *drumroll* Mumbo and Grian !!!!

(I forgot the makeup in this doodle,, and apparently the white stripe on the red part of the dress uggghh) the daycare androids are supposed to be more human looking to not scare the little kids, but cartoony (and tall) enough to differentiate from the human coworker. I like to imagine their faces are rly simple bc they're LED screens with projected expressions to make emotions n stuff. Plus I wanted to keep their faces similar to their skins with an in universe reason for it pfsjshgdhdh

Tumblr keeps bugging out every time I wanna post and it's DRIVING ME INSANE !!!! half this post got deleted and I'm SO MAD ABOUT IT but anyway here's the refs I made like 2 years ago. Their designs haven't changed since I made them so I probably won't remake them unless I start hating my old art enough LMAO

The canon heights I never wrote down so here they are: Ranboo 8'0, Wilbur 7'2, Maya 5'4, I'm 5'7, Grian 7'0, Mumbo 8'0, James 7'0, Tommy 6'6, Jimmy 5'5 and Schlatt wasnt in the AU at the time but he's 6'4

I didnt really make this au for anything except silly scenarios and because making the designs were fun pFF ALSO I FORGOT TO MENTION Sneeg is dj music man !!!! I never got around to drawing him before since I just figured out recently I wanted him to be dj music man so yeah !!

I know this isn't that much of a lore dump but I think I got all my thoughts out for now lawl everything will be under the animatronicfication au tag :v

I have GOT to draw Wilbur the way I used to. The biblically accurate animatronic eyes do NOT look good in my art style 😭😭 also I just noticed I basically painted the same thing into my sketchbook wtf I completely forgot about this doodle until I found it after digging for au art 🤯🤯

[artoutoftheblue]

Is Static actually evil and/or malicious or are they the villain because the 'good guys' see them as such? I am curious about the dynamic (Static has a more evil look in that ref but looks can be deceiving)

Chaos sr is up for morally gray kids, especially if one of them has his name. Just take the whole package of possible kids

He became evil because of how everyone was treating him. Stole the star, didnt become a Lord, but just used it to reek havoc on everyone around him except for the Bloodmoon Twins

[chikaoofka]

helloooo you rbd the "ask me about my ocs" post from me so i am here to ask you abt them (even if you said youre not good at answering them. 😔🤝😔)

i would like to know... anything! about ur ocs :] but i know from experience vauge questions r hard to answer so maybe some trivia? like, howd you choose their names or designs. thatd be cool doesnt have to be the sol ones either !! or i think ur sol ones are also repurposed ones? so their original forms would be cool too. either way i would find it interesting :D

you are so nice to me

AND YOU KNOW ACTUALLY? NAMES & DESIGNS I WAS THINKING TO MYSELF JUST NOW "OH THEY AREN'T THAT INTERESTING" THEN I REMEMBERED NO? THEY BOTH HAVE NAME-AND-DESIGN STORIES? that I find funny anyway........

also i realise how long this is IM PUTTING IT UNDER A READ MORE.

the readmore fucking MOVED?

& ONLY cassius was repurposed . though like before SoL he was . essentially nothing . rotting in my beloveds toyhouse-folder w TWO images (NOW HE'S GOT THE MOST IN MY TH AT... 40...) because I didnt know what to do with him (and it's like... i don't wanna move him out D:) & then i made him in SoL and i think a neuron fired or something idk what happend . the moment I drew him w short hair it all went downhill i think . Anyway, so original cassius, he's named after (coughs) Cassius by Foals . I SAY THIS EVERY OTHER DAY I FEEL "LISTEN TO CASSIUS BY FOALS" (LINKED, THIS TIME.) BUT HE CAME ABOUT COS I SAW A TEMPT6T VIDEO WITH UHH

SOMEONE AS THE GEN 4 GUITARIST. AND FOR DAYS I WAS IN A STATE OF LIKE... ILLNESS? "I NEED TO NAME SOME OC CASSIUS" (....) "I WANNA MAKE THAT GUY AN OC" (....) oh mon dieu now there's a blonde guy in my brain . what the fuck . what the hell? who let him in dude dude dude dude what the hell . tangent but he even was in a band. at first. cos of course he was . a band, fun fact, based on AN OLD POKEMON BAND I HAD . WHICH I HADN'T TOUCHED IN YEARS . BUT cassius was based (i say based loosely) on a shiny minccinno/cincinno named "S I N" so that's fun & the bassist (i.e.) the only other one i . sketched (half-finished?) . i wanna say "oh haha he looks like alfie but with glasses on" but he doesn't . not at all ??? he would have had the same colour hair though. so that's like... the exact same character then

see. him? i wanted to put him here he hasn't seen the light of day in months . ok . where was i . oh yeah this was dropped pretty quickly cos i didnt know what to do with them LOL. now long-haired cassius has been repurposed AGAIN to be cassius' older brother in........the loathingverse! which is cool :-)

& even like i tried so hard to make him fit with the song back when but it NEVER worked and then he gets LOATHING'D AND NOW HE FITS? what the hell man

.

also alfie. alfie oh my god alfie can i say? can i start? do not look at me strangely for this but

this was who he was based on. alfie from fucking blue y . i dont know how i found him nor why i wanted to make a character named alfie because of it but i did AND i needed a name for my achievement hunter (which i portmanteaued, horribly, into his last name) save file(s). So alfie achivunter it was.......... and AND THIS IS WHY HE'S LIKE. THE "DOG GUY". and thats why he looked like THIS at one point :

but i was making his ref & i was like. dear lord this looks atrocious . so im pretty sure i colourpicked from like . ron inside job or something (i distinctly remember being like "this sucks" "what if i made him look like ron instead" & i did) instead and now he looks NORMAL except NOW HE LOOKS LIKE CONNOR SCP CONTAINMENT AND RON INSIDE JOB???? like okay i feel mental every time i say this but like come ON . COME ON?

the Exact Same Man. ok???? i feel like a detective gone mental pointing to a board with red threads and photos like DON'T YOU SEE? IT'S ALL CONNECTED!!! THEY LOOK THE FUCKING SAME!!!!!!! THESE THREE LOOK EXACTLY THE SAME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oh and fun fact alfie is short for alfred he really cannot win . have i said this before? i probably have

& one last thing I guess

these little dots beneath the eyes . it basically means he's got a little evil in him OR really, IMPOSSIBLE TO GET FORESHADOWING. unless you .... know...... the cosmosdex??? yeah. i thought itd fit AND right beneath ALL OF MY OTHER INSANITY. WITH AN ACTUAL LITTLE TRIVIA POINT? HUUUUM. OKAY?

[ennaku-sirri-da]

Hey man Yknow what I’m actually kinda curious about what the basic plot of Roseverse is ngl. I mean from what I’ve seen habit is a big ol Grumpus muppet kinda fellow(BASED AS HELL BTW) soo ermmm, lore. Plz? *Looks at you with big ol eyes*

Okay I was gonna reply to this with a whole comic but it's taking a wHILE and I don't wanna keep you waiting THAT long so. Here's an answer in text for now!!

Roseverse didnt start out as an AU. It was a bunch of loose ideas all the way back in late 2021 for an idea I was struck with like when that Greek dude with the bathtub and the gold cried EUREKA! Except, you know, instead of making a huge scientific discovery I just made a bunch of nerd shit instead. Which is SOOO Haiderrrr /lh /affectionate

The idea was " What if Habit and Kamal were childhood friends"? ( Plaintext: What if Habit and Kamal were childhood friends? ) And so I worked off that basic premise. I took Habits diary pages, analysed them, and drew and thought out what he'd be going through and looked like at the time, with Kamal as well to mutually play off of each other. I did this ALL with my very good friend @prrusten 's help, hell we didn't even mean to make something so big, we were just talking and having fun and hitting it off!

But yeah. Here we are...Almost 3 years later! And now it's become a whole AU called Roseverse, after its Flower Kid sona/insert, Rose T. Flower. But it's not actually about him HwjjskHAKSJSJ--and its branched out beyond just Habismal though TBH Gillis is still the MOST underdeveloped character in the whole thing LOL I'll think of ideas for you one day someday muscleman. It's changed a lot too. There was a phase with Mad Scientist Kamal and everything. I don't think I'll ever post everything aha! But I will surely share content while I can.

Infact one of the changes is Habit's design...! You've seen some ofthe newer refs as opposed to Grumpus looking Habit, he looks more like a marionette. I still dearly love the old design...but messy stuff just happened and I feel immensely wrong using it again for newer art now. So I needed a specific revamp to indicate change for me. I don't really wanna get into every detail but I'll make a appropriate post about it one day or like update my pinned when I'm ready and know.

Here's a little drawing for you in the meantime Sharko! An old one but I think it still carries the spirit of the whole thing:

[ ID: Simple styled and digital colored art of Dr Habit and Kamal Bora from Smile For Me. It is in mostly dulled purple and pink tones. Habits hair gives a burst of rose and pink against the other tones.

He is closing his eyes and has caught Kamal in a hug from behind, leaning into his head. He looks worried. Kamal looks back at him, visibly tired, but there is a spark in his eye. Here his hair is long and falling down.

Whitish-purple text reads ‘’We’re in this together.’’ Then more transparent, ‘’Not Alone’’ and finally in bold clear text, ‘’Dont forget.’’ end ID]

And a song I more newly associate with Roseverse vibes...

[Thumbnail ID: A screencap from the anime Clannad. A man kneels on the ground to tightly clutch a little girl who hugs back. The background is sheer white snow. End ID]

[ VD: The music sounds melancholic, with twinkling noises throughout, and a slowly played track with echoing ambience. End VD ]

-

Morning edit: Aw Sharko.. I'm sorry this happened right after I told you about it but I've decided Roseverse will be shutting down and I shall post no further content of it for the time being. I will still continue like, using this blog for S4M stuff and make fanart in the Canon style sometime later but yeah man... :") (teary smile emote)

[chaudharis]

hey ! would YOU like to know more abt him? awesome because im gonna dump my design notes and lore notes for him here for funsies! i just wanted to make an info post for him! thank you for reading if you do!

its a bit of a long one btw, so apologies for thwt. i am very much open to ideas and suggestions for developing this little. interpretation? au? whatever you might call this. feel free to play around with him as u like hes not my oc :^] just a fun idea

DESIGN NOTES:

i want to make it clear most of the design stuff is bc i thought it was cool. then i bullshit my reasoning behind it. remember this.

i also dont know how exactly to organize this so smth more lore related might be in the design section and vise versa. i dont care enough to make this better

also design is still very subject to change because i enjoy constantly fiddling with things. fun! might update if its different enough.

uses mostly reds/purples to directly complement athetos's greens and blues. trace takes comfort in this, for the most part.

just a fun idea but i rhink its neat to have traces Not Human-ness be biological, to contrast with indras being entirely technological/robotic. adds to their parallels. (and both of them being physical at all is a parallel to hammond being fucking dead /j)

wonder why his mouth has those faint marks at the corners? because it can do this now!

why you might ask? i dont know. ask someone else. i thiught it was cool. the orange line on #3 is supposed to indicate where his mouth normally wouldve ended. so he has a wider mouth technically!

hes much more movement based now! since this also acts as a fun idea for what if in a future av game(s) we got gameplay that was even more abt the movement. so hes pretty good at parkour now. specifically climbing. ive been imagining he moves a lot like u do in celeste, except probably more stamina and faster climbing. less focus on dashing. but he can air dash too!

he has his gun i promise he has the gun i just dont like drawing it it sucks to draw

yea so he is covered in carapace, since ive had to scrap that with a different chatacter (if you know, you know) i get to put it on the same character but in a different direction. i can do whatever i want forever.

size comparison over his weird. tentacle things idk what ud call them exactly. they got bigger because i can do anything. also bc when i originally drew them i didnt look up a ref (i rarely use refs for charas and prefer to go off of memory unless i need to) and so i was like ok so thwyre big right? right. well turns out theyre not. but guess what. now they are. it is so awesome for him

for funsies i think trace can put stupid shit in his hair. its a tangled mess stuff will very easily stay in there. he hasnt brushed it in years man. he always forgets what he puts in there btw so its always a surprise for him

oh also his labcoat also is Different but i cant figure out what hed have that isnt already in av1. so imagine he does smth new WOW WOW SO COOL !

LORE NOTES:

this whole hashtag Look is either from the original bioflux mutation getting worse or a few different ones. i havent decided which one i wanna go with. either way this is a gradual change. it will get worse!

see i dont have much for What hes doing because i dont have any ideas for what the rusalki are doing now so thats very much up in the air. all i have rn is that hes helping them somehow. not of his own choice really.

has a very. Not Great relationship with the rusalki. hes incredibly bitter about his situation (lack of any real control) and so. well they arent besties. hes a lot more snarky and rude to them. which is fair i think how would you feel in a situation like that huh. not so great huh.

his best friend is oracca bc shes the only person who hasnt lied to him and has only been helpful and he loves to chill with her. she never speaks or does much of anything but thats fine with trace, he doesnt mind. likes to do the rubber duck thing with her (says thing out loud to pin point whats wrong with whatever hes working on). she also doesnt mind id like to think

hes. a little more aggressive but as a defense mechanism. hes in hostile territory all the time and under incredible stress all the time, can you blame him realky? stress can make people aggressive, it turns out. crazy.

also with this, i say hes more aggressive but hes just more all bark no bite. hes like this

but if you take like, anothwr step closer hes like this

see. hes still kind of a weenie dw. i understand

he really wants to be kinder again. but hes not in a situation where he can. this kills him

also! heavy unreality issues. this is what happens when you spend months if not years thinking ur living ur life as usual until it gets revealed actually you were in a dream simulation the whole time. unrelated but i think he hates the movie inception.

the unreality is still a massive issue but he copes with it by after so long just going "ok well ill just assume Everything is a dream no matter what because the opposite would be horrifying and i have no evidence that disproves this. but i can act like i dont think this on the off chance rhat it is real. but i know its not"

doesnt come up much at all because hes not ever around someone New but he is pretty self conscious about how he is now. i think hes also a very touch swnsory person so he develops lots of touch related tics. like when nervous he starts to pick at himself, runs hands through hair a lot, etc etc. very touchy. with the parts hes most self conscious abt.

massive identity issues, especially because of his distinct lack of humanity. how can he really be trace anymore if hes changed so much, etc etc. those questions. he can feel his connection to The Trace Identity sorta fading as he becomes his own kinda guy away from this but it fucking sucks for him. because if hes not trace then what is he. who is he. if you tell him athetos hed curl up and cry

speaking of curling up and crying, thats what hes kinda doing a lot internally. he really wants to go home man and for real this time he wont want to go back to sudra this time he promises. but also if he does go back he will be 100% convinced that isnt real. which is fair

if you ask him how long hes been there he'll tell you "a few months, i think." this is not true, he has been there for years doing somethinh, couldnt tell ya what tho!

Generally Not Doing Too Great On Many Levels But Hes Dealing With It

ok thats abt all i can think of atm? ill update this if needed. otherwise hi if you read this ur very kind and i appreciate that. it feels nice when people read my stuff. makes me feel good :^] i hope you feel good today too. today is a good day

[dewprisms]

Thinking about the past and year n stuff before i go to bed (i never cared for staying up)

gonna put this under a readmore bc it came out more negative than i was expecting...

thinking back to the past year, we got the kittens fixed, i got more hours at work, got to see some siblings again, got to see my other nephew again, got rly lucky with pulls in Po Ma E X throughout the year...

idk what else was good though. didnt do any drawing practice, didnt work on my fic, didnt finish work on the character doc, started on the ruesid ref but didnt finish, stuff in the house keeps breaking, havent seen a doctor yet (its been like a decade), havent seen a therapist yet, the only new game i played was totk and pkmn sleep even tho i bought some more, actually barely played much games at all this year, failed to practice good hygiene habits, failed to lose weight, i actually gained even more than when i lost it 3 years ago and i still didnt get skinny at all back then, and actually i think my health has gotten worse because im even MORE tired than before all the time and my feet hurt a lot too, wasted money on a gym membership cause after august i stopped having the energy after work to go, and with it being cold out with no car idk how ill do it in the slow months (aka jan and feb), failed to talk to ppl more, failed to do anything good with the group chat because my memory is so shit that i just forget, my acne seems to have gotten worse, i keep falling behind bad at work (and it doesnt help that we cant keep ppl for more than a week but thats the company's fault but it still falls on the rest of us to pick up the slack), keep feeling like a burden at work and unintentionally getting on ppls nerves, plus the state of the world has also gotten more shit, and it doesnt look like itll be improving any time soon...

idk it just hasnt been that good and idk what to look forward to anymore. not even xbgr in k h 4. im so fucking lonely and i feel both my physical health and mental health deteriorating and theres nothing i can really do except watch it happen from behind these eyes that constantly question if reality is really real or not. ive been wanting to cry for the past like 5 months and i dont know what the fuck to do anymore, i dont have the energy for shit

🎉🎉wooooo!! 🎉🎉🥳🥳🎈

[spiribia]

mockups of fake phantom invasion random events in animal jam play wild that even i dont know why i made. the gist is that random mini-events would spawn around jamaa, and then alphas would teleport in to rally players to assist with the problem. most random events would only have a phase 1 in the overworld that pretty much all players could access - ex. going to a specific spot and doing a certain emote. if successfully completed by enough cumulative participation before time runs out, each phase will grant all participants a reward. some events will also advance to a slightly more involved later phase, which in even rarer circumstances culminates in a final phase like a big boss fight that a bunch of players participate in at once (these would give desirable exclusive rewards)

[moonyswriting]

Heart and Soul

@peggyrose19 and @wonder-womans-ex had their birthdays over a month back and I didnt manage to make them a gift. but I still wanted to make you something because I wont just drop it after I missed the day. so this is for you two. you are incredible and talented people and I'm honoured I get to call myself your friend. I hope you'll like it.

characters by @lumosinlove

thank you for beta reading @moonofthenight

Chapter 1

“Final seconds of the second period on the clock, Frank. The Saint’s going for the goal again, passing Tremblay and going straight in Nutty’s direction-”

“And that was a hit on Leo Knut, by the Hollow’s Saint’s winger Andrew Kline. And now, the expected punches follow. Marly, they could have really seen Logan and Finn coming, right?” “Definitely, Frank. No team likes it when someone fights with their goalie but these two seem to be particularly protective of our sunshine boy. Tremzy is already throwing punches at Ethan Bart and I can see O’Hara skating over to them.”

“Oh and here comes Luke. Throwing off his gloves and joining his teammates. Maybe with all those uncovered wrists we could actually get a chance to see some soulmate tattoos again. Last one spotted was Kasey Winter’s almost two years ago now, spelling out Natalie, the name of his girlfriend. They still seem to be going strong; I’m happy for them. That incident did however get most of the players to cover their wrists up,” Frank waited for a second before continuing, “How’s the fight? Looks like we got a big one tonight, eh?”

“It is! We’ve got three people from each team fighting at the moment, but the Refs are pulling them apart now. Coach Weasley doesn’t look too happy that his players are risking injuries for fights again. He’s calling a few over now and I do not want to be on the receiving end of Arthur’s wrath, believe me.”

“Same here, Marlene. Huh, that was weird. Did you see that?”

“It was. Loops just had to shake DV so he’d move. He had stared a hole into the ice and didn’t react to the Coach or his teammate. Haven’t seen him do that before. Hopefully, he’ll be fully focused again after the break.”

“I’m hoping it wasn’t a bad hit. The Lions really don’t need another injury right now.”

“Especially after only just getting Finn back from his small wrist injury that didn’t allow him to play the last two games.”

“Yeah. We’ll keep everyone updated of course. I’m sure he’s being checked right now.”

“In the meantime, there were some fantastic plays in there. It would be quite nice for the players to have a good game before some of them get to have a break.”

“Yes, All Star week is next week and we’ll be seeing a few of the Lions there, such as the newly wedded Remus Lupin and Sirius Black, but also last year's MVP Logan Tremblay, of course.”

“I’m excited Frank! We’ll be right back after a quick break for the second period.”

-

Luke was still feeling off after the fight, going through the questions Layla asked him on autopilot. No, he wasn’t hurt, there was neither pain there nor there, yes, he could still remember his address and full name.

Their new PT seemed at a loss. She could see that he was acting very strange and, honestly, she was getting worried about forgetting some usually obvious injuries for his behaviour. There was only so much a human could guess, so she simply asked.

“What happened out there, Deveaux?”

It took a moment for Luke to register he was being addressed, mumbling a “nothing” before continuing to stare at the wall. How stupid did this boy think she was? 

Letting out a sigh, she clarified, “I just need to know if you’re injured or not,” after a second of hesitation Kayla added, “but if there’s something bothering you or just occupying your thoughts, you can always go talk to Heather. She’s helped a few of your teammates too.”

She watched his expression while telling Luke. Some guys were embarrassed of going to therapy. There was no reason to be, of course. No one got shy about having the PT check on them but when it came to mental struggles, they somehow believed they have to handle it all alone. Society and the messed up way of thinking that they teach children, honestly. She was glad they at least had some people on the team who encouraged visiting Heather any time they saw someone struggling. She knew Sirius really did help them a lot by being so open about going to her office at least once a week.

There really was no way to tell how Luke thought about her proposal, he certainly seemed to be thinking, but there was no way to determine what about. Suddenly Luke broke the silence.

“Can I go?”

Since Layla hadn’t found any injuries and she couldn’t really do more than encourage him to visit Heather, she let him leave.

The brunette was out of the room the second after the words had left her mouth.

--

They had won. The locker room was already buzzing, the mandatory playlist echoing into the hallway. After their last game against the Saint’s, which they had lost, the whole team was even more excited about having won. There was even some kind of dance match between Logan and Sirius going on, not that Luke noticed. He had been a bit off for the rest of the game, much to the dismay of Coach Weasley. That got him to spend most of his time on the bench in the last period, but he didn’t mind. For once, hockey was not his main concern, not even during this game.

He had seen it. When number 7 had thrown off his gloves for the fight, there it had been in black cursive. A soulmate tattoo, spelling out “Luke”. Of course "Luke" didn’t necessarily mean Luke as in himself, but there was still a possibility.

A possibility that his soulmate was a Saint. A Saint. He would have been happy with almost anyone, but no, it had to be an ice hockey player. He didn't care about the gender. Luckily he wouldn't even have to hide a relationship between him and a potential boyfriend because of Remus and Sirius. But a Saint? Even in his thoughts, he knew he was whining. The real problem was that they would not only live miles apart and would have practically no time for each other half of the year, but they would be opponents. In ice hockey, the other team is the enemy. He couldn't befriend the enemy and he definitely couldn't date the enemy. Even if he wanted, he'd be blamed for not playing as hard as he could or making exceptions when it came to his hypothetical boyfriend.

So really, dating a Saint was not an option.

Still, his curiosity got the better of him. If this was really his soulmate, no matter how much he didn't want him to be, he had to know.

Standing up, he made his excuses and slipped into the hallway, running along until he got to the other team's locker room.

Great plan, idiot, what will you do now?! You can’t just go in and ask in front of everyone.

Then a group of people stepped out, each looking at Luke as if he had a kick-me sign on his forehead and as if they were considering it. Quite a few had walked past him and when one held open the door for his teammate, Luke could see that there were only three people left in the room. No time better than now, he told himself, gathering some of his Lion courage and walked straight inside.

“The fuck, Lion?!”, one of the players mumbled while he left the room too, shortly followed by the other player that wasn’t the one Luke had been looking for.

He took a deep breath. The tattoo wouldn't refer to him. Of course it wouldn't. Why would it be a Saint, really. Stepping closer to the boy lacing up his shoes, Luke's eyes met a pair of brown ones, looking up through gold curls.

“Why are you here?”, the other asked, narrowing his eyes and standing up to be on eye level with the Lion.

Oh, the charm of rivalry, always straight to the point, no need for formalities.

“Do you want to brag about catching up? Hate to break it to you, but you’re not in the lead and we’ll win the next one anyway.”

Even though his words sounded confident, he leaned back and knocked on the wood of the benches.

“No,” the brunette stated, looking him dead in the eyes. This boy had activated Luke's competitiveness so there was no turning back, “to both. We’ll just win as we did today. Last time was luck and you know it.”

The other raised an eyebrow at him. “The only thing that was luck last time was that you got a goal.”

The nerve this person had. Here he was, coming to actually try to talk to him and possibly get to know him to find out about the tattoo and just got insults in return. Luke was about to shoot something back when the door opened again.

“Babe, you coming?”

[freebooter4ever]

Ref anon: I hope you can get help for that pain. Maybe a nerve is pinched? I'm really not sure about my future. I have a lot of hobbies but just work a shit customer service job. Getting motivation to do drawing at all is difficult let alone animate. Which is a great mental state to be in when my only plan for my whole life since childhood was animation. 🤷‍♀️

its tendonitis and im pretty sure the only way to get rid of it is to take a break from working which is obviously not possible so just gonna ignore it till i die i guess \o/

so yeah you struck a cord with me, this got long...

i cant help with motivation, i have too much of it. i lived with my grandparents for a year while grandpa was sick, and it was the first time they'd ever really seen me /work/ and even they were shocked. it really is constant - if i have twenty minutes and im not using it to draw its wasted time, you know? my first roommate here in LA was concerned too - she kept trying to get me to stop working and go out and back then my excuse was i didnt have a job and no money for going out, but really im just like that all the time. i try to balance it with seeing friends and social media and everyday shit like eating food, but its hard, my favorite people are the ones who will just sit and work with me lol! (or going out and working in places im not alone and quiet). i guess what im saying is...if its really your passion, is it not there all the time? i only ask because it took me a long time to realize that although i loved to analyze animation and watch it - the way i process art doesnt quite have what it takes to do that. we all love the end product, but just because the animation part is the most front facing part...doesn't mean that's necessarily where your actual passion might lie...if that makes sense? there's SO MUCH to do in the animation industry, its crazy. for me, i finally realized that all my obsessive energy revolved around character and especially faces, and i just started focusing on that. i would much rather be concepting a wide variety of characters than spending a whole year animating about one minute of a two hour movie.

that said there's also the sad reality that some people have had doors open more easily than others. i feel you about being stuck in a retail job you feel wasted in :( im sorry you are in that position. i hope you are able to make a change, but i understand just how fucking /trapped/ that can be. watching life slip by into nothingness while the tiny snatches of meaning only happen during off hours and scraped together seconds of free time. one of the biggest ironies though is that this is how a lot of original animators felt about dsn*y. i mentioned that on my road trip i stayed with the son of an animator who worked on snow wh*te - he wasnt one of the 9 old men but he was their contemporary and friend, and the animator took the job just to make money off his art. animation just wasnt his full passion and he eventually quit, moved up north, and started experimenting with helicopters and boe*ng lol. 

and in reverse of that, as i grew up with a father and a grandfather who worked for boe*ng and the US space program, ALL my open doors were flight and space related - my cousin currently works for N A S A and my other cousin for boe*ng - they took the doors but i didnt want anything to do with it. it took years for my grandpa to finally come to terms with the fact that my passion for art was as strong as his passion for airplanes. he grew up a farm boy daydreaming about flying, and had to take a circuitous route to finally get there - army, college, mechanical engineering, finally rockets. he gave my dad and me all the chances grandpa would have wanted as a kid - my dad took them - i didnt want any of it. i would much rather have had those chances that the animator got.

and then of course there are the institutionalized gates - barriers against entry for women, minorities, LGBQT, people without money...its a LOT to fight against. which is of course why we celebrate the exceptional people who DO break through those barriers and succeed despite it all. but it can be demoralizing to be on the other side of those barriers. demoralizing is too soft a word. i dont think there is a word for how much it can hurt.

some wisdom that might help: randy pa*usch's last lecture - he is a white male who definitely does not understand the race/sex 'walls', but he makes good points, and also he came at the animation industry sideways for very similar reasons - through education and research rather than the traditional job promotion route. and then someone closer to my own age/time: justin scar*ed - i dont mean his road trip videos, i mean the old vlogs from 3-6 years ago when he was 31 divorced and depressed and realizing he had to release himself from his own pressure of his music career. his quest for positivity is an interesting concept, and i sympathized with that feeling of your life taking a direction you didnt chase after but somehow ends up being the thing you were actually looking for the entire time. if you want a success story there’s always my favorite: steve aok*. he went against everything that was set up for him in life and still made it work ^_^ (of course of these three, guess who also grew up the rich kid lol). or norman re*dus who quite literally accidentally became a model and successful actor. im paraphrasing this horribly, but my impression was that as a teenager he was selling shitty cat paintings on the streets of paris - which sounds romantic but miserable at the same time - and then followed a girl to california, got a crappy job in a motorcycle shop, went to a party and yelled at some people from a balcony, landed his first stage role...and eventually created the character of daryl and finally got the chance to have his genius really shine. (sometimes i wonder though, if it was frustrating to end up being famous for acting rather than art which was arguably his true passion?)

i hope any of this helps, i am pretty exhausted lately so apologies if my sentences are incomprehensible in some parts. and you know, my DMs on here are open if you want to talk more specifically off anon <3