#figure out ur identity through ur flips

[fightwing]

something the agent of spyral plot missed out on really going into was how often futuristic, best in the business, #1 spyral face hiding spy tech was proven useless by dicks own personal brand of stupidity

[luxaofhesperides]

greener on the other side.

Danny makes a habit out of hopping into portals and exploring the places he ends up. It just so happens that this time, he ends up in Gotham right as the Signal begins his patrol. Duke meets the strangest, funniest, cutest guy on the roof of the Gotham City Public Library. He knows Batman would not approve of literally anything he's doing, but sue him, he wants a meta friend and this guy seems to be up for it. -- OR: how Duke and Danny get together despite having secret identities and living in different dimensions.

chapter three: how it shines - 8.6k

read the entire fic on ao3!

the final chapter of this fic... and the end to the first fic in the series!! theres a lot i say in the end notes of ao3 so i highly recommend reading this chapter there! . . .

Signal: you ever feel like maybe the world is out to get you

Signal: [attached photo shows Signal lying in the middle of a torn up road, post-fight, his helmet lightly blackened with ash.]

Danny: buddy, the world has already taken me out

Danny: [attached photo is a selfie of Danny, frowning at the camera. Behind him, a large, flying robot is pointing a rocket launcher at him.]

Signal: okay, you win. are you alright???

Danny: lol im fine. this literally happens every week i know how to beat this guy up

Danny: tbh i think the real threat to my existence is school

Signal: so true. one day we will be free of it….

Danny: but not today

Signal: but not today

-

Danny: got a minute?

Signal: yeah what’s up?

Danny: u have a secret identity

Signal: …yes?

Danny: have u told other people abt ur secret identity

Signal: yes? but some of them just kinda found out on their own

Signal: why? 

Danny: how did that go. did they react well? did u have to defend urself from them?

Signal: there were some problems about me throwing myself in danger, but i was always safe with them

Danny: okay. cool. got it.

Signal: everything okay?

Danny: im thinking about telling my parents a secret about me. im kinda terrified of how they’re going to react

Signal: are you coming out to them?

Danny: in a way i guess. 

Danny: gonna recruit my sister into helping me talk to them. and also get rid of all their weapons beforehand so there’s a lower chance of them shooting me

Signal: shooting you?!?!? dude are you going to be okay??? don’t do anything that could get you hurt!!

Danny: gtg

Signal: dude??

Signal: danny?

Signal: let me know how it goes, okay? i can’t travel through dimensions like you can, but i can figure something out if you need a rescue

Signal: good luck danny!

-

Danny: ever get into a fist fight with a walmart knock off vampire in the parking lot of a burger joint?

Danny: [attached photo is Danny’s hand flipping off a man hovering in a parking lot. He’s wearing a cape and vampire-coded clothes.]

Signal: ever have a snack break in the middle of fighting a crocodile man?

Signal: [attached photo shows Signal holding up a half eaten taco, a giant crocodile man behind him with his own box of tacos. They’re sitting next to each other in an alley.]

Danny: point to u bc u actually got food

Signal: 😝

Signal: also, everything okay? with your parents?

Danny: let’s not talk about that.

Signal: okay. but if you do want to talk, i’ll be here for you

-

Danny: idk if dash is trying to annoy me into another fling or if he actually wants me to throw him across the field but if he doesn’t back off im going for violence

Signal: uh

Danny: THAT WAS MEANT FOR TUCKER IM SO SORRY

Signal: should i be jealous that someone is hoping for another fling with you lol

Danny: it was once and will never happen again. 1) he’s not my type 2) he’s so annoying

Danny: also why would u get jealous of anyone ure literally a hero? hello?

Signal: hey man that guy is with you in your dimension and im all the way over here

Signal: totally reasonable for me to get jealous!! this is like a more extreme version of having online friends

Danny: true… hey i can swing by for the weekend if u want!! honestly the less time i spend here the better

Signal: that bad?

Danny: i’ve known everyone here for my entire life. i need OUT

Danny: gothams cool! its a big city with things to do!!! obviously im gonna like it more than Normal Town Illinois 🤮

Signal: weather is bad all week tho…. even if you come over we wouldnt be able to go out

Signal: its been a while since we had a storm so bad

Danny: man if that was happening here i would be able to punch the storm away

Signal: im taking that as a joke

Danny: no i literally punched a storm away before. he was a dick tho he deserved it

Signal: ….this is still Normal Town Illinois right?

Danny: .

Danny: ok fine maybe u have a point

Danny: anyways!!! i just wanna hang out with you dude i would be happy just playing video games or something

Signal: we can do that!! let me know when u get here 😊

Signal: and good luck dealing w this dash guy!!

Danny: ugh dont remind me

-

Signal: hye u know our plana to hang out tody

Signal: maybe rain chek tht im not goos company rn

Danny: u ok? i can always come by some other weekend

Signal: got hit and everythif bad

Danny: did u hit ur head?

Signal: yes

Danny: ok im going to call u so you can stop looking at ur phone screen. just in case u have a concussion

-

The phone rings twice before Signal picks up. He mumbles something that might be a hello, but it’s honestly hard to tell. 

“Hey, man,” Danny says, leaning back in his chair to look up at the faded glow in the dark stars he stuck up on his ceiling years ago. “Are you okay?”

Signal hums a vague response, then sighs, sending static down the line. “Just got a headache right now. Can’t even go out since it’s too bright.”

“Is it sunny in Gotham right now?”

“No, it’s super cloudy and that’s still too much. I hate concussions.” There’s a bit of a whine in his voice that reminds Danny that under the helmet, Signal is a normal guy just like anyone else. And like everyone else, powers don’t save him from the pain of brain trauma. 

Danny would know; he’s gotten pretty good at taking care of injuries and the such through his high school career of getting tossed in lockers and attacked by ghosts. He’s pretty sure parts of his brain are still rattled from the amount of times he’s been thrown into and through walls. 

“I hear you, man,” Danny commiserates, “Head injuries are the worst. But it should start feeling better in a few days, so you can just stay home and relax until the pain stops.”

“Ugh, I wish. I still have to go to school tomorrow.”

“Dude, that sucks. If you can stay home sick, then don’t force yourself to go. Concussions are no joke.”

Signal hums again, then mumbles, “I can’t think of an excuse. Cause the concussion is from being hit on patrol so like. I can’t say that! I have to figure out a reason for my civilian identity to have a concussion.”

“Can I suggest something?”

“Please, I’ll take anything at this point, man. My brain is done for.”

“Make up an embarrassing story. You have to make yourself look silly and people will believe you more and not ask follow up questions because you’re too embarrassed to say more.”

“...Keep talking. This sounds viable. The only advice I got was to basically fake my death or get into a car accident to get more injured.”

“I think you need to fight whoever said that,” Danny says, “That is horrible advice.”

“I know!” Signal laughs. “Oh I shouldn’t have laughed, my head is hurting more.”

Danny lets out a slow breath, tilting his head back to look up at the ceiling of his bedroom. If he strains his hearing, he can make out the rustle of fabric from Signal’s end of the call as well as the murmur of his parent’s voices downstairs. He closes his eyes and focuses on the call, pushing away the heavy weight of regret on his chest that hits him each time he thinks about his parents. 

Now is not the time for that. Signal needs calm and quiet, so Danny is going to give that to him and then let him go to rest.

“Are you drinking enough water? Getting some comfort food?”

“Yeah, I’m being taken care of. Don’t worry Danny, I got a whole crew of dysfunctional caretakers.”

“Good. I’ll let you get back to resting, then.”

“I’m still so sorry I had to cancel. I was looking forward to seeing you again.”

Warmth rises to his cheeks and Danny rubs a hand against them, trying to ignore the butterflies in his stomach that came to life at those words.  “We can always do a different day. Let me know when you feel better, okay?”

“Yeah, alright. Thanks, Danny.”

“I hope you feel better soon, Signal. I missed you too.”

There’s a pause where Danny’s heart pounds hard against his chest, as though trying to escape his ribcage. He bites his tongue, wondering it that was too much, if he made things weird, if Signal didn’t feel the same way. 

And then Signal says with a soft voice, “I can’t wait to see you again. You’re too sweet to me.”

“Okay!” Danny squeaks, cheeks aflame, “Go sleep, Signal! I’ll talk to you once you can look at a screen again.”

“Alright. Thanks, Danny.”

“Of course, dude. Bye.”

Signal makes a soft mumble that could be ‘bye’ but it’s hard to tell with Signal’s voice going all rough and low, exhausting in every sound, and then the call is ending. 

Danny drops the phone onto his desk and draws his knees up to hold them against his chest. He rests his chin on them, filled with longing for Gotham.

Not just for the Signal, though that’s a big part of it. But for the anonymity of a big city in a dimension where he doesn’t exist. A place where he can be himself, just Danny instead of being torn between his parent’s son and Phantom. Plus, Gotham has heroes! Not other ghosts, not ghost hunters, but people with superpowers who help people whenever they can. 

It would be nice to be someplace like Gotham where he wouldn’t have to carry the responsibility of protecting an entire city on his shoulders. It would be nice to have friends who understand why he can’t not give his all to protect people, regardless of how they feel for him, friends who make the same choice, friends who aren’t weighed down by guilt with their part in his death.

As much as he loves Sam and Tucker, he knows that will be something that haunts them for the rest of their lives. 

It’s better now that it had been in freshman year, but it’s still something that changed them all. He’ll always love them, and he knows they love him, but they need to spend some time apart.

In Amity Park, they’re the outsiders who are too weird for the rest of the school, outcasts who stick together, a tightly knit group full of secrets. They’ve been each others only friends for the longest time; sometimes, others come in and out of their lives, like Valerie, but the bond he has with Sam and Tucker can’t be replicated. 

They need to be with new people to grow any more. He can see how they’re holding each other back. 

They’ll always find a way to be together, but they have to be apart first.

Gotham will be good for that. 

Hell, any place in that dimension would be good!

Danny just wants to be more than he is, wants to be better and he can’t do that here or with his friends. 

And he certainly can’t do that with his parents.

After telling them about everything’s he’s done as Phantom, all the times he’s ruined their inventions or fought with the GIW or endangered people through his fights with other ghosts, his parents just stared at him. They were seated around the kitchen table, Jazz standing behind Danny with a comforting hand on his shoulder, as his parents just… stared.

There were no accusations of possession, no weapons drawn, no demands for an explanation. Just a haunted look in his parents eyes as they went silent, still, horrified. 

“Danny,” his mom had whispered, “You mean you’re—”

“I’m Phantom, yeah. The ghost menace,” he had answered.

“You’re dead,” she finished as if he hadn’t spoken. “You died and we didn’t… we never noticed. What— How—”

The thing about being Phantom is that Danny knows he died. He knows he came back changed. But he doesn’t like thinking about it, still wakes up from nightmares of electricity racing through his body, frying him from inside out as it stops and restarts his heart in an endless painful pattern. Yes he died, but he got powers out of it! He got to meet other ghosts, explore the Infinite Realms, do so many cool things no one else is able to do…

But he still died. Half of him is still dead. He’s never going to be the kid he once was.

“It was an accident,” he had whispered, “With the portal. The on button is inside it, and when I went in for some stupid picture, I tripped and hit it.”

“And we only cared about the portal working,” his dad had said, grief coloring every line in his face. “We didn’t even look at you. We just went straight for the portal. We were so happy to be right that we didn’t stop to think about what it meant, how it could have happened…”

The tears he saw well up in his parents eyes made his heart twist uncomfortably in his chest. For several long minutes, silence settled around them as his parents closed either eyes are stared down at the table, refusing to look at him. Jazz had squeezed his shoulder, then pulled him up out of his seat.

“Danny, go upstairs. Or to Tucker’s place. I need to have my own talk with them,” she had said. There was a steel in her gaze that told Danny there was no use in arguing, so he walked out the front door and transformed so he could fly out into the woods where he could be alone, watching the sky change colors as the sun set.

It’s been two weeks since then. His parents still can’t look at him for too long. They can’t look him in the eyes at all.

He wonders if he would have preferred them trying to kill him. At least then they would acknowledge that he’s still here instead of moving around him as if he’s a memory haunting the halls of their home, one they’re too guilty to face just yet. 

He misses his dad’s loud voice and enthusiasm. He misses his mom’s quick wit and quicker reflexes. He misses the chaos of each meal they would have together and how his parents would drag him and Jazz along on random, sudden trips for the sake of science. 

He misses his parents. 

Danny hates that the family he loves died with him in that portal. 

As much as he still loves them, being in the house, and in Amity Park in general, is suffocating. The farther he can get from them the better; Danny isn’t sure he’d react well if he stayed in this universe and woke up one day with his parents decided to break into his new home because they finally feel up to having a conversation with him. 

Maybe he’d talk to Signal about what living in Gotham is like. That might help him make a decision on what to do with himself once he graduates from Casper High School.

He’ll save it for the next time they meet. 

Some things are better done in person, after all. And it wouldn’t hurt for Danny to use it as an excuse to make sure he’s fine. 

But for now, he’ll wait until the days pass and keep daydreaming about better things.

-

Signal: hey man, u doing okay? i haven’t heard from u in a while

Danny: yeah im good! i was waiting for u to text first bc i didnt know how long you’d need to recover from a concussion

Signal: ive been good for a while, dude. dw abt waiting to text me, just send me something and i’ll reply once i can!!

Danny: i’ll keep that in mind for the next time u get injured 👍

Signal: but fr are u good? tell me to back off if u need but u seem kinda down

Danny: im fine!!! just dealing w the crushing weight of existence, that’s all 🫠

Signal: oh mood. anything i can do to make things better for u?

Danny: nah it’s fine, im just like this sometimes. i promise it’ll pass

Signal: want a distraction?

Danny: please

Signal: so i was just swinging thru the streets as i do and this group called me down while theyre having a huge argument

Signal: so i go bc i dont want things escalating yknow? 

Signal: and idk the context of this argument AT ALL but one of them turns to me

Signal: looks me dead in the eyes

Signal: and says ‘penis enhancement pills are NOT a thing, right?’

Danny: SKDFJALSDJ NO WAY

Signal: oh man. this isnt even the best part of this story

Danny: there’s MORE?????

Signal: its gotham, danny, there’s always more lmao

Signal: so anyways……..

-

Danny: i hope you know that story has been haunting me all week

Danny: dash was being a dick again and i was half asleep so i told him ‘maybe u’d be less of a dick if u stop taking penis enhancing pills’

Signal: THATS GOLD

Signal: my job here is done. nothing will ever top that. i’ll see myself out ✌️

Danny: he looked so shocked lmaooo

Danny: tried to say he DOESNT take any pills but it was too late

Danny: he was too flustered by it no one believed him

Danny: top 10 things to say to ur former bully

Signal: i didnt know he bullied u. good for u! get his ass!

Danny: he’s fine now lol just annoying. we all grew out of the super cliche high school phase after freshman year when we had to work together to fend off ghosts and the government

Signal: nothing like a little anarchy to bring people together

Signal: its why im still good friends w the people who were in a gang i joined when i was younger to be like. street kid vigilantes bc gotham was going bad back then

Danny: everything u say about gotham and ur life is so fascinating literally how are u real?? ure the perfect ya novel protagonist

Signal: thats the sweetest thing anyones ever said to me ❣️

Signal: but also lol. lmao. gotham really is just like that. no one is immune

Signal: u also sound like a ya protag jsyk. 

Danny: literally how im so boring??

Signal: danny. babe. im gonna have to bring out the capital letters for this bc i get the feeling that u really believe that

Danny: oh boy

Signal: Listen. You live in a small town that’s Haunted, fight ghosts, have powers, went from being bullied to being chill with your bully, and can travel the multiverse. You are a YA Protagonist.

Danny: damn i can’t argue with that :/

Danny: why’d i have to be the ghost hunter’s ghost son. i wanna be a side character. give me a refund on this life pls

Signal: do i dare ask clarification on the ghost thing?

Danny: uuuh no? its kinda personal and im dealing w it but its also kinda like ur civilian id?

Danny: its something i’ll share once we’re closer and i know u better and can trust u with it

Signal: totally fair. want me to pretend that part of the conversation never happened?

Danny: please

Signal: cool. watch this

Signal changed Danny’s name to YA protag (real)

YA protag (real): ooooh my god

YA protag (real): im not taking this lying down

YA protag (real) changed Signal’s name to YA menace

YA protag (real) changed their name to YA protag (retired)

YA menace: lmao

YA menace: does this mean… ure my senior…. my knowledgeable mentor… my senpai 🥺

YA protag (retired): i will throw us both into a black hole dont even try me 🔪

YA menace: LMAO

YA menace: fair. just saying that dealt me so much psychological damage

YA protag (retired): deserved

-

YA protag (retired): can we attempt Danny Visits Gotham: 2! Electric Boo-galoo?

YA menace: yeah!!!! im free this weekend if u wanna come by then!!

YA protag (retired): i can do this weekend!!

YA menace: i will do my very best not to get a head injury before then

YA protag (retired): can u maybe aim for no injuries?

YA menace: danny we need to be realistic here

YA menace: my goal is to have no bleeding wounds that need stitches. as long as i don’t bleed its not a problem 👍

YA protag (retired): …..

YA menace: no need for the judgment i have everything under control

YA protag (retired): …………

YA protag (retired): :/

-

YA menace: lmk when ure gonna be in gotham! i’ll make sure to be outside waiting for u

YA protag (retired): i’ll be another hour but i’ll send a msg before i head out!!

YA protag (retired): actually it might be a bit longer i gotta fight some people who are trying to cheer me up

YA menace: should i be concerned

YA protag (retired): nah its fine they’re just annoying

YA menace: if u need to reschedule

YA protag (retired): noooo!!!! i’ll be in gotham soon i swear!!!!

YA menace: ok!! ok!!!! i will keep waiting for you then 🫡

-

Duke waits for an hour and a half, swinging through streets and waving to people, before Danny texts him to let him know that he’s next to the botanical gardens. 

One moment, Duke is perched on the roof of a Mexican restaurant in the Bowery. The next, he’s halfway across Gotham, swinging recklessly from building to building.

So what if he’s excited to see Danny again! That’s normal!

Anyone would do the same in his position.

Plus, Duke still feels so bad about having to cancel last time due to his concussion. The sooner he gets to Danny, the sooner he can start making up for it. He didn’t spend the last few patrols being extra careful for nothing; he only has a few bruise and no bleeding at all! 

Danny’s star glow helps Duke find him behind the botanical gardens, hidden away from the rest of the street. 

He drops down from the roof, using the shadows to soften the impact of landing.

When he looks at Danny, leaning against the building, he’s greeted with a bright smile. 

“Signal!” he says, pushing off the wall to close the distance between them. “I hope I didn’t make you wait too long or anything.”

“Nah, you’re good. You alright?”

“Oh, yeah, of course! It was just some friendly fighting, and they wouldn’t be able to really hurt me even if they tried. I’m all good! So, what’s the plan for today?”

Duke looks him over just in case, but Danny does appear to be perfectly fine. Not a single bruise on him. Maybe it was just a few friends roughhousing with him? That might be it, since Sam and Tucker did try to take each other out last time they were in Gotham. So he’s just going to go with what Danny says! He’s fine, and they can move on!

He’s totally going to worry about it later, but right now is not the time for it when Danny’s waiting to spend the day with him.

“Well, I still have to finish patrol, but that’s just for another hour if you wanna join me,” he says. “And then we can head to the Hatch to just… hang out. Or we can find something else to do, totally up to you.”

“The Hatch?” Danny repeats, tilting his head to the side curiously. Duke has to take a moment and just appreciate how cute Danny is before he can compose himself enough to answer.

“Yeah, it’s like my… secret base? HQ? The place I go for superhero things that is for me, specifically, and that I don’t have to share with a bunch of other people.”

“You have a secret base?! That’s so awesome! I just have—” Danny falters, his excitement falling, and then he plasters on a pained, fake smile. “I’ve always wanted to see a superhero’s HQ. Are you sure it’s fine to show it to me, though?”

Part of him wants to ask about what he was going to say before switching gears, but the drawn expression on his face is more than enough to make Duke back off. “Yeah, man, don’t even worry about it. Besides, it’s not like there’s any other places we can go to without me revealing my identity, you know?”

“Fair enough,” Danny nods. “But maybe one day we can?”

“For sure,” Duke says. “Come on, up for a quick patrol around Gotham?”

“Oh, definitely.” The light returns to Danny’s eyes as he lifts off the ground, floating. The smile on his face is more sincere, and the sight of it makes the knot of worry in Duke’s heart pull loose. He pulls his grapple out and aims for the highest ledge of Poison Ivy’s greenhouse, tucked in the back of the botanical gardens, then takes off.

Danny is flying next to him immediately, a blur of invisibility, and they fall into a rhythm quickly as they head towards the Bowery. As Duke free runs and swings between buildings, Danny flies around him, the occasional laugh slipping past his lips as he circles around Duke. 

It’s hard not to have his attention stolen by Danny, but Duke is here to protect the people of Gotham, so he focuses 90% of his attention to the streets, keeping an eye and ear out for any trouble. 

There’s not much happening today, thankfully. He’s only had to stop a few burglaries, a bank robbery, and chase off a stalker before Danny arrived. Truthfully, the peace is making him nervous; there hasn’t been a big attack to the city in a while, with no word on the movement of rogues and nothing big brewing among the gangs and mobs. Peace rarely lasts so long in Gotham, and Duke is genuinely worried the next thing will be some continent destroying, apocalypse bringing disaster. 

In the last hour of his patrol, he only has to stop a purse-snatcher and help someone move their broken down car off the street and into a parking lot. Danny stays in the air for both, invisible to everyone but him, and the blur of his aura floats around the areas Duke stops at curiously. 

They hit up touristy places last time he was in Gotham, and food trucks before that. Maybe next time Duke can get takeout from a nice restaurant and they can have a rooftop picnic. 

Not quite a date, not yet at least, but something close to it. A testing of the waters. An unspoken promise for something more.

With the hour ends, Duke comes to stop on the roof of a tattoo parlor and gestures for Danny to join him. 

The blur of invisibility fades away and Danny’s features come back into focus as he lowers himself down to the roof. 

“What’s up?” Danny asks, glancing around them curiously.

“It’s about time for patrol to end, so we can head to the Hatch now. But I do need to blindfold you so you don’t see where the Hatch is located.”

“Oh! Yeah, that’s fine. Will I just have to hold onto you or something? Since I won’t be able to see where we’re going.”

“I was thinking I’d just carry you. It’s easier that way.”

“Sure, that works!” Danny closes his eyes, cheeks already darkening with a blush. “I’ll just… let you blindfold me now?”

Duke desperately wants to smoosh Danny’s cheeks together in his hands, but valiantly resists the urge. He’s on a mission! To hang out with Danny! He can cry about how cute Danny is later!

He walks up to Danny on silent feet, circling around him. Then he lifts his hands, picturing the light solidifying in his palms, turning to fabric that darkens and obscures, bending the light to be darker and darker until it’s nearly black. He gently pulls it across Danny’s eyes, leaning in closer to him to make sure he’s not putting it on too tightly.

Danny gasps slightly when his back bumps into Duke’s chest, and Duke can’t help the way his eyes dart down to Danny’s mouth, his red cheeks, the long line of his neck. 

Focus, he tells himself sternly, and draws the ends of his makeshift blindfold back to tie the ends together behind Danny’s head. 

“There,” he says in a low voice. “All done.”

Danny doesn’t answer. He just leans back against Duke, pressing them together slightly, and Duke brings his hands down to Danny’s hips to hold his steady.

“Ready to go?”

“Ready,” Danny answers in a faint voice. “How do you want me?”

Now that’s a dangerous question to ask right then and there. Duke bites back a number of flirtatious, suggestive answers, and makes himself actually think about the best way he can carry Danny while grappling to the Hatch. He’ll need one hand free to grapple, but also needs to keep a secure grip on Danny…

He steps to the side and guides one of Danny’s arms up to wrap around his shoulders. Then he picks Danny up, leaving him to wrap his legs around his waist as he walks over to the edge of the roof and looks towards the area in Gotham where the Hatch is hidden. Duke takes a moment to adjust his arm to keep Danny secure against his chest, then takes hold of his grapple with his free hand.

“Ready?” he checks, tightening his hold on Danny’s waist.

Danny nods against his neck, tucking his face in the crook of Duke’s shoulder. “Ready!”

Duke grins and jumps off the building, shooting out his grapple as they begin to fall. Danny yelps lightly, then clings to Duke even harder, his blindfold still secure around his head. It’s become a bit fainter as Duke’s attention slipped off of it, but he focuses on it again to darken it and keep Danny from seeing where they’re going.

It occurs to him halfway to the Hatch how much trust Danny is putting in him. To put a blindfold on him. To lead him to a place he’s never been to before. To let Duke swing him across the streets of Gotham without using his own ability to fly. 

Oracle’s apprehension about Danny (and his friends) is a heavy weight on his mind, but he can’t help but think it’s unnecessary. She’d understand if she ever met Danny in person. He wears his heart on his sleeve and offers it so freely; how could Duke not trust him? 

The weeks they’ve been texting each other only make him sure that Danny’s a good person, someone he wants in his life for as long as he can stay, someone he wants to be honest with. They just click, somehow, like they’re each holding a puzzle piece that’s been missing in each other’s lives. 

I think I’ve been waiting my whole life to meet you, he wants to say. But the street entrance to the Hatch is just a block away and Danny still doesn’t know his name, so Duke bites his tongue and forces all those feelings back into more platonic territory. 

Just as the reach the building with the hidden panel to allow him entrance to the Hatch, Duke pulls at the light around them to hide them from sight as they drop down from the sky. 

“Almost in,” he says, holding Danny up with one arm as he tucks his grapple away and push the fake brick cover out of the way to punch in his twelve digit access code. 

A hidden door in the wall of the building, the back bricked off from the operating portion courtesy of Wayne Industries funding the restoration project for this area of the city after a major alien attack, opens up smoothly and without a sound. The ground slopes downward at a steep angle; he uses this door for when he’s riding his motorcycle out of the cave networks underneath the city that keep the Hatch connected to the Batcave, but it’s not too far from where the Hatch itself is. 

He carries Danny in, then makes sure the door closes completely behind him before setting Danny down on his feet. “We’ve still got a bit of a walk to the Hatch, but you can take your blindfold off now.”

“I’ll wait until we get there,” Danny says. “I’m going to use this as an excuse to cling to you for as long as I can.”

“Fair enough!” Duke laughs, “Cling away, I’ll make sure you don’t trip.”

And cling away Danny does, wrapping his arms around Duke’s left arm, holding onto it as they make their way down the tunnel. Duke keeps an eye out for anything that might trip him and carefully steers him past them. 

“Are we underground?”

“Yeah, there’s this huge cave system under the city that we use to get around,” Duke answers. “Though we’ve paved in small roads and made stable tunnels to go through, so it’s all safe.”

“Huh, that’s cool. It would be nice if I had a way to get around Amity like this.”

“Danny, you can fly.”

“That’s not relevant!”

“How is it not relevant?” Duke laughs incredulously, jostling Danny slightly. Danny turns towards him and they trip over each other slightly, clutching to each other to keep their balance.

“It just isn’t!”

They bicker lightheartedly down the tunnel until it opens up into the garage of the Hatch. Duke helps Danny up the stairs to the main area, where he keeps his suit, weapons, and the large computer Bruce installed when the Hatch was first made. Once he’s sure Danny’s comfortable, he leaves to change into his civilian clothes with only a domino mask slapped over his eyes to protect his identity.

And if Duke takes an extra minute to fix up his hair, the long locs in a disarray from being tied back and stuffed into his helmet, then that’s no one’s business but his own. 

Maybe he does need to get a hair cut. He’s starting to get why Steph wants to shave her head and rock a pixie cut like Selena. But, on the other hand, he does like how he looks with longer hair, especially when it’s tied up…

Long hair for now. It makes him look good and he’s here to impress Danny. 

When he heads back to where Danny is, he sees Danny sitting down patiently, his blindfold still on, though it’s become much more transparent than it was before. He can see how Danny’s eyes are closed beneath it, waiting for Duke to return, tapping out a slow rhythm on his knee with his fingers. 

“You can take that off now,” he says as he walks up to Danny. 

“You sure?”

“If I wasn’t, I wouldn’t have brought you in here.”

Danny reaches up and gently pulls the blindfold off, slowly blinking his eyes open. He watches as the blindfold dissolves in his hand, becoming light again, then shyly turns to look at Duke. 

“Oh,” he says softly, taking in Duke, who tries very hard not to fidget and reveal just how nervous he is to be out of his Signal armor before Danny. “You are so unfair?”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“You can’t be kind, a superhero, and attractive! Tell me something you’re bad at so I know you have some flaws.”

Duke grins, flattered. “You think I’m attractive?”

“Stop fishing for compliments!” Danny pushes him lightly, barely enough force to make him tilt to the side. “Give me something you’re bad at, come on.”

“Well, if you really need to know…” Duke takes a moment to think of something that won’t completely embarrass him. “I’m terrible at learning other languages. Vocab doesn’t stick in my head, grammar rules mean nothing to me, and my accent is atrocious.”

“That doesn’t count, that’s normal,” Danny argues.

“It the only thing I can think of right now! I’m just really bad at non-English languages!”

Danny rolls his eyes, shaking his head fondly. “I can’t believe you. You have powers, you’re cute, and you’re good at flirting. Stop winning at life so much, the rest of us stand no chance against you.”

“I promise I’m a disaster when I’m not trying to impress people.”

“Lies. You’re being perfect right now and there’s no one to impress.”

“I’m trying to impress you.”

Danny blinks. “Oh.” He bites his lip in an attempt to force down a smile. “Shut up. I don’t count. You don’t need to try to impress me, you’ve already done that.”

“Yeah? Well, maybe I’ll try to be more of a mess around you from now on.”

“Please do, I can’t be the only one making a fool of myself. Where’s the friendship? The solidarity? Suffer with me!”

Duke shoves him back playfully, and just like that, they fall back into a rhythm of easy conversation and light touches, skirting the lines of friendly with something more. Time slips away from him and Duke spends every second with Danny wishing he could have this always, that they didn’t have a time limit over their heads, that the universe itself wasn’t keeping them apart. He shows off the Hatch and some Bat gadgets, which Danny finds fascinating, then they spend an hour comparing their most commonly used powers. 

Danny has to leave all too soon, opening up a small portal of swirling green with the help of a small pocketwatch-like device, and Duke can only hope that they can do this again soon, but without the domino on his face.

One day, he swears. One day they’ll have that.

-

YA menace: hey quickly rate this guys fit

YA menace: [attached photo is a goon with a black and white striped shirt with a purple question mark safety pinned onto it. They’re also wearing neon purple sweatpants and are glaring at the camera.]

YA protag (retired): ngl thats not the worst ive seen. 6/10

YA menace: 6???

YA menace: 6?????????????

YA menace: danny i say this with all the love in my heart, go get ur eyes checked

YA protag (retired): before u say anything else. look at what i regularly have to deal with

YA protag (retired): [attached photo is a floating man with blue-ish skin an d a very dramatic hairstyle. He’s wearing a long black cloak, a white suit, and a Green Bay Packer’s football jersey on top of all that.]

YA menace: damn. no wonder ur judgement of bad fits is Like That. this guys to blame

YA protag (retired): wanna know the worst part?

YA menace: this can get worse??

YA protag (retired): thats my godfather. 

YA protag (retired): this is a man my parents thought were fit to be responsible for me and my sister if anything happens to us

YA protag (retired): THIS GUY

YA menace: u have my sincerest condolences

YA menace: oh shit more riddler guys are here i gtg they got guns

YA protag (retired): be safe!! please dont get shot!!!!

YA menace: i’ll do my best 🫡

-

YA protag (retired): came home today and all the weapons that were attached to my house disappeared

YA protag (retired): i feel like im in the twilight zone

YA protag (retired): if i start talking backwards or acting like a robot pls know it is not me but something wearing my face

YA menace: the weapons attached to ur house???? 

YA menace: im starting there but i want u to know that everything u said was concerning

YA protag (retired): have i not mentioned it before? my parents are kinda mad scientists and make a lot of weird but working things. mostly weapons to fight ghosts.

YA menace: cant believe ure only just dropping lore abt urself when we’ve been talking for so long

YA protag (retired): in my defense!!!! everyone here knows abt them so im used to not having to say anything!!!

YA protag (retired): people usually just Get It!!!

YA menace: moving on to my second point: having the weapons removed from ur house is whats concerning??? not the weapons being attached to ur house???

YA protag (retired): listen. i have spent p much my entire life with a house that doubles as an armed fortress. when i was a kid i was convinced it would come to life and protect me from monsters. this was also during my urban legends monster phrase and i scared myself reading abt them and needed the comfort

YA protag (retired): my POINT is that its normal for my house to have weapons. so seeing them gone is worrying!!!!!

YA menace: .

YA menace: ok fair enough.  last point: is being replaced by a robot version of urself a concern in ur universe? bc it is here

YA protag (retired): no its not a legit concern here

YA protag (retired): probably. dont quote me on that. i had a cloning situation a few years ago

YA menace: a hwat

YA protag (retired): dont worry about it!!!

YA protag (retired): oh my parents are home. i need to talk to them. Bye!!

YA menace: gl!! let me know if u need rescuing from evil clone robots

-

RED: before I say anything else, Signal this is the price u pay for not letting me play with interdimensional tech after you let O have a turn at it.

YA protag (retired): um.

YA protag (retired): wrong chat???

RED: no this is the right chat. Hi Danny :) 

YA protag (retired): hi???? who are u????

YA menace: oh my god

YA menace: this is NOT NECESSARY RED

RED: as I said. U did this to urself.

YA menace: 🙄🙄🙄

YA protag (retired): wait. did u… hack into this chat?? did u hack the phone????

RED: yeah lol.

RED: was a bit of a challenge but it was fun

RED: had to pull out the spare alien tech to make something that would connect

YA protag (retired): ok 1. tucker will want to marry u for ur brain

YA protag (retired): 2. ALIEN TECH?????

YA menace: i feel like we already talked abt aliens being real in my dimension

YA protag (retired): THATS DIFFERENT FROM HAVNG ALIEN TECH

YA protag (retired): hey red what do u accept as bribes

YA menace: u ask him while im right here????

YA protag (retired): u dont have the alien tech. red does. case closed.

RED: oh wow. Signal….. Wow.

YA menace: what? shut up. cant leave any of yall unsupervised i swear

RED: also, Danny I accept tech from different dimensions and also fun tasting sodas and energy drinks

YA protag (retired): done. i will have the goods ready next time i go to gotham, pls hook me up w alien teach

RED: do u just like new tech?

YA menace: hes a space nerd so he loves aliens

RED: do u just wanna meet an alien then?

YA protag (retired): CAN I??!!

RED: yeah I can pull something together for u

YA menace: omfg. Red can u go stop stealing danny from me

RED: up ur game Signal. We’re ALL going to try to steal Danny away

YA menace: how tf do i kick u out of the chat

RED: u cant 😇 im too good to be kicked

YA menace: put that halo away we all know what u really are

YA menace: 🤡

YA protag (retired): omg….. rip red ur cool reputation will be missed

RED: hey now. What happened to the bribes :( 

YA protag (retired): ur still gonna get them but i am playing favorites

YA protag (retired): and signal is obviously my fave

YA menace: knew i could count on u to have my back danny 💛

YA menace: drop ur location red i just wanna talk

RED: lol no

RED: good luck catching me :) 

YA menace: coward!!!!

YA protag (retired): there he goes…..

-

YA protag (retired): hey u know what i just realized?

YA menace: what?

YA protag (real) changed YA menace’s name to Light

YA protag (real) changed their name to Night

Night: rhyming buddies 😄

Light: i get the light bc of my powers but wheres the night coming from?

Night: bc i love space! the night sky!!

Light: ok thats pretty cute ngl

Light: give me some warning bc u do stuff like that its bad for my heart

Night: stop sweet talking me im busy feeling clever

Light: lmaooooo

Light: fair enough i’ll get back to it in 3-5 business days

Night: good 👍

Night: also is now a good time to ask abt red…. who was that….

Light: that was a nerd. dont worry abt him ok im cooler

Light: serious answer: hes red robin and hes another vigilante in gotham. we’re chill

Night: did u find his location for a throw down tho

Light: i can do u one better: i know where he lives

Night: oh???

Light: yeah his dad is my mentor of sorts so its not THAT impressive that i know

Light: i did steal all his zesti tho lol

Night: not sure what that is but im proud of u

Light: its just a drink that hes obsessed w. i love being a minor annoyance 😇

Night: shaking ur hand. its really the best thing to be

Light: hell yeah!!!

-

Light: hey got a kinda serious question for u

Night: whats up?

Light: have u thought abt ur future?

Light: like what u want to do in college, where u want to go after high school, what career u want

Night: i mean. some. 

Night: not as much as my parents want me to. 

Night: my sister goes to harvard and is super smart. im not that impressive so i keep disappointing them

Night: and with things recently… idk its hard. it kinda feels like they dont believe i have a future.

Night: not that they really see me in the present anyways

Night: sorry that was heavy. short answer is no! not really!

Light: that sounds rough. wanna talk abt it?

Night: not really but not talking hasnt done me much good

Night: my sister would want me to talk anyways. to someone trustworthy at least

Night: so if u dont mind listening…

Light: go for it!! im here for u danny

Light: emotionally at least. not physically but thats not by choice

Night: it can wait tho honestly. whyd u ask abt the future? something on ur mind?

Light: just feeling really lost rn is all.

Light: its like everyone around me has an idea of what to do with their lives while im still surprised that i made it as far as i have

Light: this is really the first time ive seriously thought abt my future and i have no idea what to do

Light: so i wanted to talk to u bc u help make things feel less terrifying

Night: signal…. ur going to make me cry

Night: u make me feel brave too

Night: ♥️

Night: i get what u mean 100% btw. u go so long sure that u dont have a future that u dont know what to do now that its here

Light: exactly.

Light: what am i supposed to do with my life? i dont want to be a hero full time, ive seen how that breaks people

Night: do u want to go to college? or do u just feel like u have to bc everyone else is?

Light: i do want to. 

Light: my parents both went and theyve always wanted me to get a degree and be successful

Light: they may not be around anymore, not really, but i do still want to make them proud

Light: they cant see me graduate, but maybe when i tell them the next time i visit, itll reach the part of them thats still alive in their minds

Light: what about u? do u want to go to college?

Night: yeah. it was always my dream to become an astronaut. work at nasa and everything

Night: no chance its ever gonna happen now tho lol

Night: dying and the health problems that comes w that will do that to ya ✌️

Light: oh man that sucks

Night: yeah

Night: i might still study aerospace engineering tho. even if i cant be an astronaut, maybe i can help others get there

Light: thats a good alternative!! im glad u still have some idea of what u can do that can help u work at nasa and achieve part of ur dream

Night: we’ll see tho

Night: im not really feeling college atm. or life in general

Night: idk i feel���. stuck. like nothing will change even if i get out of illinois. it’ll just be the same stuff at a different place

Night: and i know itll take one visit from my parents to start ruining things for me

Night: i just… dont really wanna deal w that. ive kinda given up on life tbh i might as well just focus on the ghostly side of things. stay in the ghost zone more permanently

Light: i dont wanna judge or anything but that doesnt sound healthy?? 

Light: pls dont disappear into the ghost zone. i’d miss u.

Night: sweet talker

Night: i wont. dont worry. its just a feeling i get sometimes, that it’d be better if i wasnt in this world. if i could just go somewhere else

Light: hey. what if

Light: sorry if this idea is stupid or something

Light: but what if u lived here? in my dimension? u could establish a life and go to college here. 

Light: a total fresh start

Night: thats. not a bad idea actually

Night: i would love that. wouldn’t it be hard to do tho? i dont exist there.

Light: we can make it work. its not like us gotham vigilantes are new to creating new identities/lives out of nothing

Light: i could ask for a few favors, do a few dubiously legal things. you could live here

Night: im planning to take a gap year to figure out if i wanna stay in the human world at all. i could spend that year in gotham before making my choice

Night: if u dont mind me asking this huge favor of u

Light: i dont mind at all!!

Light: danny i would love for u to be here are u kidding me. i’d do anything so we could be closer together

Night: thanks signal ♥️

Night: i made this all abt me im so sorry

Night: wanna talk more abt how ur feeling or ur plans for the future?

Light: maybe some other time. i wanna get to work on making sure u can live here for the year (and more! hopefully!)

Light: tell u what. 

Light: we can talk more abt this the next time we see each other in person ok?

Night: deal

Night: im really glad i met u

Light: me too

Light: im here for u for as long as u want me around, honey

Light: u dont need to worry about a thing with me

Night: ure too sweet.

Night: im going to go now before u make me melt into a puddle of feelings

Night: ♥️

Light: ♥️

-

“Hey Babs, I have a favor to ask…”

[childotkw]

hello. ive read past the first task (chapter 24? 25? not sure, ill figure it out when i find the time to pick CS back up.) and wow. yes, this is another long one LMAO ! maybe even longer than the previous ask.

20 chapters is a lot to cover my thoughts on so i might skim through a lot!!! an ask i gave u a week-ish ago about hermione being lucius' foster daughter was a lot of initial shock LMAO… it's wildly contrasting to canon. i love how the reveal actually brought in the first mention of changes that voldemort made about muggleborns and the laws surrounding them. the law first off is just horrid… i mean, it obviously had good intentions (e.g. muggleborns not having early experience and magical education before the age of 11 unlike purebloods and lesserbloods) BUT the execution is just bad.

i don't think voldemort's morals are very much in shape in the first place. it's still horrible to take children away and have them raised by absolute strangers. HOWEVER i love hermione and draco being foster-siblings …. + draco isn't as obnoxious as in canon !!! “I’m sure,” the other boy drawled in a practiced manner. “that you have a number of…hidden talents.” draco is hilariously funny and he's so different from the git that is usually portrayed and fanfics. his dynamic with hadrian is really fun to read LMAO.. i thought it was very interesting that draco was chosen as champion for hogwarts but i should've expected it honestly.

i also love hadrian's 'i take no shit' attitude when it comes to the students from the other schools!!! its so fun to read and see how that changes over time as hadrian is displaying how skilled he is/and chosen as champion for beauxbatons.

talking about hadrian being the champion for beauxbatons, JACOB… i originally read/interpreted the scene where he's putting in the piece of paper wrong and thought it was a hogwarts prefect or something. im stupid,,, but i was very ?? shocked but also like,, i should've known.. i shoudve known... i did at first really like jacob's character and i was . extremely sad . but he's also a douchebag

i literally FELT the dread hadrian had when his name was chosen,,, i feel so bad for the boy LMAOFDJS . my theory about the blank paper backfiring was wrong however he still was the champion anyway.

i loved the interactions between riddle & hadrian. it's so funny seeing hadrian miffed about riddle staring. intently at him 24/7 in his class. when hadrian eventually found out it was a manticore and like. how they are basically unbeatable by spells. and the fact that EACH CHAMPION GOT A DIFFERENT CREATURE too... and hadrian just happened to be that fucking unlucky i flipped. sweat pouring down my forehead like what the fuck is bro gonna do... + hadrian sleeping in riddle's office is absolutely hilarious . raina finding out and going '?????' and then 'im not that much of a whore. he is literally this close to going to a nursing home.' real food i had never been fuller

btw this was my thoughts being recorded real time while reading: hadrian s;eeping in proffessor riddle's office is. hilarious imo.. nagini 'you let him in ur bed' is also insanely funny. but also,, a manticore?? A MANTICORE??? hdrian will not have a ogod time.

then the first task was absolutely wild. hadrian is a genius absolute biggest brain,, the environmental magic shit was cool as hell but the DOPPELGANGER?? that's the shit. then hadrian finally getting to the pole and being safe but getting. rammed by the manticore. then sent off to be healed?? severely injured?? almost dead?? then RIDDLE USES LEGILIMENCY ON HIM? wild. i really loved the description on hadrian's mind and.. occlumency. canon harry is absolute shit at occlumency and ybtm harry isn't too much better. the empty (what do i call it?) part of hadrian's occlumency was cool as hell. i've read other fics that talk about occlumency/legilimency and i've never seen a concept like that !!

riddle/voldy finding out about harry's real identity was fatal... and their dynamic absolutely shifted. the tension, the passive aggressiveness in the air was so strong i could feel it through the screen. after the reveal voldy is very easily dislikable imo... bro has me ready to commit homicide because he is an absolute dick. i also think that ??? hadrian having being given the puzzle/hint thingy so much later than the other champions is so unfair but things are just like that i guess.

another thing i found really interesting was lily apparating to the dursley's home. petunia and lily's relationship is bad, but the way it was described through lily's pov explained it!! really well !! you wrote the complex relationship they have extremely well. i find it also clever that lily used muggle transportation which was an obvious choice since she had the option.

i also. had no idea that sirius was actually abernathy until it was outright stated. i felt incredibly stupid that i didn't pick up abernathy's weird dialogue and stuff but oh well ! i know now... anyways, i'll check in again once i've read to like? maybe the second task? have a good day dear author :>

Ooohhh hello again!! I do love the long asks! 🥰

Oof yeah, Voldemort's muggleborn policy is really...not good. Like, in some ways, knowing his history you can understand why he put it into place - but yeah, like you say, his execution isn't the best. He's the epitome of "cool motive, still kidnapping".

I am glad that you like Draco though! He's not always a character I like, but I think in CS we get to see a more softer side of him, particularly when he's with Hermione, and I'm glad I made the decision early on to write him that way. (And him and Hadrian are hilarious. Their asshole energy is amplified when in close proximity and it's what they deserve 😂).

Hadrian's character arc in general is something I'm really proud of in the story - he goes through such a wild ride, and comparing him to where he was in the beginning, it's really obvious the changes he's undergone! His core traits stay the same, but he gets more...real in a way. Less a cut-out doing his mother's will and more an individual.

As for Jacob - yeah. Look. Boy fucked up, and it was funny to watch the flip in people's attitude towards him in the story over time 😂 he screwed Hadrian over, but objectively he's also such a minor thing in the grand scheme of things. They're relationship is an interesting one to be sure!

And Hadrian and Riddle!! I'm so excited to see how you react to them and how their interactions change over the course of the story!! In the beginning they're such a mess - and while they're still a mess 40 chapters later, they're a more coordinated and understanding mess 😂

(I honestly forgot some of their earlier scenes, and the whole 'Hadrian sleeping in his office' which is so dumb because it was ICONIC 😭)

THE FIRST TASK!! God, what a throwback hahaha - Hadrian really got a chance to shine there right before I smacked him down 🤣 And Riddle is an opportunistic little prick, isn't he? I think 'the empty' is a cool way to label it! It really is the ultimate 'empty your mind' defence against intruders!

And the identity reveal - I remember so many being so shocked that I did it so early in the story! And the angry is there but they get better! I promise!

I also like that you highlight Lily going to Petunia. They are the definition of Complex Siblings imo - so thank you! I'm glad you liked that little glimpse at their relationship! And don't feel silly about the Sirius-is-Abernathy reveal. For the longest time I wasn't sure who in the Order I actually wanted him to be, so it took me a while to land on Sirius.

But again - THANK YOU!!!! I love reading these! And it makes me so happy to get to read your thoughts as you go through the story and what pieces you pick up on!

[sunshades]

🤥✏️ and 🌪️ for tirare!

[oc asks] + 👑

TIARE SO POPULAR IN MY ASKBOX. HAPPY FOR THEM

🤥 are they good liars? do they have tells to show they're lying?

mechanically: nooooo NEGATIVE CHARISMA LOOKING ASS. doesn't mean it's not worth trying. has semi-successfully hidden they're half eladrin to the party for 2 months i think, through sheer Focus (very funny, we've been rolling con saves for it). i will count being from elven bloodlines of seasonal mood-ring eyes and markings as "having a tell" and count "covering that shit up with makeup" as a point toward being kind of a good liar. more in general: they're a mediocre actor with a lot of heart, so they're amazing at things they've practiced a lot, like assuming a new identity and being super mean (they're currently here in camp). kind of a tell: hair flip when nervous. it's an elle woods kind of move.

✏️ is there a particular quote / lyric that you associate with them?

SHOUT TO THAT VON RADICS POEM "I WAS WRONG BEFORE WHEN I SAID MEAN THINGS ABOUT LOVE SONGS. I'M SORRY LOVE SONGS" it's just sooo it. beside the whole romantic love thing of the poem it's very much also about forgiveness towards urself which is very sweet. lyrics... they have a big ol playlist out of which boys don't cry might be one of Thee songs, but i've had the vaccines on loop for a couple days so 👍 i always knew "let's go to bed before u say something real let's go to bed before u say how u feel" kind of hilarious. their ladyprince girl best friend at them for years.

🌪️ what is the biggest change you've ever made to them? how have they changed from their original version?

KIND OF LITTLE I FEEL. WEEEE as the whole party. figured out we were having a cross-campaign family tree of elves with red-adjacent hair and an m- initial like midway thru, which made me go from "uhh UHH theyre a sun elf or something?" to having a Big Ol Family, and esp the eladrin stuff which is preddy important to their character now. ended up making me lean more on the vibe of hm... duality i guess. Thee standing between but not rly feeling like u fit in any part of the world + learning how to make ur way to where u wanna go anyway. this also means they have like, a bunch of hairstyle changes and i'm DREADING making an artfight sheet and having to explain the visual journey without sounding crazy (#swag) then u__u made em as a character w a big theme of Grief since the start which has always been very fun to explore. especially after last year that has been Something to me it's very cathartic as well to write silly little character who go thru The Shit and Have Been Hamlet Many Times, Inside Their Head, and then get their silly little happy ending ☀💖

actually wait i have real answer. they weren't gonna actually be a theater kid, it was gonna be just metaphorical. now they like directing and set design and doing makeup. #growth (the crowd boos)

[sgtjbbhasmyheart]

Drunk Texting Is(n’t) Bad for Your Health- Chapter One

Series Summary: Talk about your unconventional meet-cute! Bucky receives a text by mistake requesting he prove he's not Reader's sister. The easy dialogue between Reader and Bucky sparks a natural friendship, but could it lead to more? Bucky still deems himself unworthy of any form of affection or love. Reader is hellbent to prove him wrong. With the help of some (meddling) friends along the way, Bucky may get his happily-ever-after after all.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 2101

Chapter Warning: Bad Language Words, tiny bit of angst

A/N: I started this on AO3 awhile ago. Now that I have a blog dedicated primarily to just Marvel/Bucky, I thought I’d add it here, too. Enjoy!

DO NOT copy or replicate without my permission.  

Bucky heard his phone buzz as he was tugging a butter-soft tee over his head. He glanced at the digital clock on the nightstand next to his bed as he worked his arms into their respective holes.

9:36

Steve was long in bed already, so the text most likely wasn’t from him. Sam was on a me me kick-- No, what did he call them? Memes!-- of a disgruntled cat which he swore reminded him of the super soldier. He wouldn’t be surprised if it were him. Or possibly Nat. She picked up the new issue of Guns & Ammo the other day and was sending him pictures of a Mossberg MC1sc 9mm she was drooling over.

Smoothing the body of the shirt over his torso, Bucky ambled over to his bed. He snatched up the phone from the navy blue comforter and flipped it over. To his amazement, the text wasn’t from Sam or Nat. Or even Steve.

(917) 460-5480 work thing boring af. kinda tied one on. might be late meeting you tomorrow

He blinked several times at the message, uncertain how to respond. It was a wrong number, right? Bucky hadn’t made plans with anyone for tomorrow that he could remember. Plus, everyone he knew had the same work thing. And it was rarely boring.

Definitely a wrong number.

He set the phone down near the clock, choosing to ignore the text. Hopefully, whoever this person was, figured out quickly they were texting the wrong number and moved on.

Bucky pulled back the covers before climbing into bed. His body melted into the mattress, muscles relaxing for the first time since breakfast. Training had been non-stop all day today. It felt good to just be, for once.

He grabbed the book he was reading off the nightstand and opened it to the spot he left off. He cleared his mind, as best he could, and concentrated on the words on the page.

A few pages in, his phone vibrated alive again. Another text message.

(917) 460-5480 sis dont be mad youd be drinking too if you had to sit thru one of these business dinners

Bucky sighed. He had hoped his radio silence would have clued this person into their mistake. Wishful thinking. Before he could punch out a reply, another text came through.

(917) 460-5480 timmons is droning on about this new client. kill me now

He quickly typed out a reply:

(917) 308-3117 I think you sent this to me by mistake.

Bucky watched the text indicator pulse as this unknown person worked out their response.

(917) 460-5480 haha very funny sis

Bucky huffed at this person’s disbelief, thumbs working on typing out his next message.

(917) 308-3117 I’m not trying to be funny. I can’t be someone’s sister when I’m a man.

He set the phone down on the nightstand again, hoping this person finally took a hint. He opened his book back up to the current page, taking a deep breath.

The room’s silence was broken again by the loud thrumming of his phone skittering across the surface of the black wood veneer.

(917) 460-5480 how does kevin feel about this so close to the wedding???

(917)460-5480 will you still need a wedding dress or will you just get a tux???

(917) 460-5480 am i still your maid of honor???

Bucky chuckled at this girl (no, young woman) asking the essential questions.

(917) 308-3117 Your sister did not get a sex change. Yes, she will still need a wedding dress. Yes, you are still her maid of honor. Like I said before, wrong number.

An almost immediate reply came through.

(917) 460-5480 prove it

Bucky grew slightly irritated at the insinuation. Why couldn’t she take his word for it? He exhaled loudly through his nose.

(917) 308-3117 How?

A few moments passed before the device juddered in the palm of his large hand.

(917) 460-5480 selfie

Bucky blanched at the request. He could feel the color drain from his face, only to immediately heat with a blush. A selfie? That is the last thing he wanted to do.

Although he’d been exonerated for his crimes as The Winter Soldier, he still knew about the dislike people felt about him as a person, in general. They couldn’t get past the brainwashing or other persona. God knows he still struggled with it.

He couldn’t go broadcasting his face through texts to a stranger. What if she was one of those who didn’t understand he had no say in what he did or what happened to him under Hydra’s control?

What if he ignored the solicitation? He could do that. Maybe even turn off his phone.

She did seem the type to be very persistent until she got what she wanted.

True to form, another text rang through.

(917) 460-5480 i will keep texting until i see your manly face

One corner of his lips quirked higher. Yup, persistent.

He navigated to the camera app on his phone and switched it to selfie mode. He stared at the damp locks falling to his shoulders. His beard would require a trim soon, but it wasn’t scraggly. Luckily, he’d had the hindsight to shave his neckbeard in the shower earlier.

Was he considering this? Some girl says jump, and he asks how high?

He combed metal fingers through his hair, blowing out a breath.

(917) 460-5480 im waiting

Bucky growled at the text, running a hand over his face. “Okay, okay. Give me a second,” he said to his phone. He held it up to head height, half an arm’s length away.

Click!

He previewed the picture, assuring himself it didn’t reveal too much. It was, somehow, off-center, containing a bearded chin and half a smirked mouth, one nostril, and a half-lidded eye.

Before he could talk himself out of it, Bucky pulled the messaging app back up and then sent off the picture. He tossed the phone aside, not wanting to watch the taunting blinking dots as he waited for a reply.

The picture was barely recognizable, but someone like Steve or Nat could tell it was him. It would be okay. No one would know.

His phone vibrated violently near him on the bed. Bucky cautiously plucked the device up, debating whether he wanted to read her reply. What if it said, “Holy shit! You’re The Winter Soldier!”? The hope of this woman thinking he was just some regular guy knotted up his stomach. He didn’t know why he cared so much about whether this stranger thought he was The Soldier or not. He had no control over who believed the lies perpetrated as truth through the media. He could only wish for the best.

He blew out the breath he was holding in and eyed the phone’s screen.

(917) 460-5480 is it fair to say men shouldnt be allowed to have long eyelashes??

Bucky laughed and immediately thought of poor Steve.

(917) 308-3117 You should see my buddy’s. The girls swoon and complain at the same time.

He quickly added to the message thread:

(917) 308-3117 Am I correct to assume you believe I’m a man and not your sister?

The response was swift.

(917) 460-5480 oh shit ur not my sister

(917) 460-5480 this isnt 9173083447?

Bucky laughed again, the tension in his chest slowly unfurling.

(917) 308-3117 Unfortunately for you-- no.

(917) 460-5480 ugh im such an idiot sorry for the shit i said

(917) 308-3117 Don’t worry about it. I had a good laugh at your expense.

(917) 460-5480 oh god now i feel like a bigger ass

Bucky suddenly felt like backpedaling. He hadn’t meant for her to feel bad about her mistake. It was cute in a roundabout way.

(917) 308-3117 Please don’t be embarrassed. It was the highlight of my night.

(917) 460-5480 me forcing u to prove ur a man was the best part of ur night??

Bucky thought for a moment. Was it the best part? The training sessions had become monotonous lately, even with the new agents. The team hadn’t been on any missions in a few weeks, so it was pretty accurate to say he was bored around the compound.

(917) 308-3117 I suppose it was. Work’s been a little slow, and there’s only so much training you can do before it becomes tedious.

(917) 460-5480 training? r u in the military? ooh, r u an athlete??

A laugh bubbled up from his chest. It was comical to see her try to guess his profession. His selfie hadn’t announced who he was to her after all.

(917) 308-3117 Something like that.

(917) 460-5480 so mysterious! r u some assassin who needs to keep his identity secret? is that y ur selfie only showed a quarter of ur face??

He paled at the implication. Maybe she did know and was yanking his chain. How did he block numbers again?

Another text came through from the mystery woman:

(917) 460-5480 not that i mind u have a luscious mouth

Bucky guffawed at the comment as flames rose beneath the skin of his cheeks. He hadn’t remembered blushing this much in such a short amount of time in decades.

(917) 308-3117 How much have you had to drink tonight, doll?

(917) 460-5480 doll?? what r u my grandpa??

He chuckled again. God, he was old enough and then some.

(917) 460-5480 enough to not want to shoot my brains out but not enough to know this dinner isnt a party

(917) 308-3117 Maybe you should get back to your dinner? I don’t want to get you into trouble.

He regretted the text the second he pressed send. Was he trying to get rid of her? No. Or was he looking out for her? This person he knew nothing about. She was more entertaining than the recurring nightmare he’d been having for the last week, that's for sure. He'd cling to this unknown to avoid slipping into that black abyss.

(917) 460-5480 aww does the military-trained assassin athlete mchottie not want to talk with me anymore?? 🙁

(917) 308-3117 No!! I’m honestly concerned you’ll be reprimanded if you pay more attention to your phone than Timmons.

The last thing Bucky needed was to feel more guilt, especially if it was at the expense of someone’s livelihood. His shoulders were already heavy enough.

(917) 460-5480 thats sweet but dont worry ur pretty little head over me timmons wouldnt last a day w/o me

(917) 460-5480 timmons may be the boss but i run that office

He simpered at her swagger. He could only imagine what kind of office she worked in because, again, a total stranger. Did he want to get to know her more, or was this a one and done thing? Would she wake up tomorrow and want to continue the conversation or blow him off for the drunken mistake her first text had been?

Bucky stared at his phone for several more minutes, pondering precisely what he was doing and what his expectations of the night were. It’s not like he was going to meet her in person, right? Was he that delusional? He was an Avenger now. He didn’t get a social life. Not that he had one before but still.

He was startled from his reverie as the phone shook in his hand.

(917) 460-5480 did i scare you away??

(917) 308-3117 No. Just thinking about tomorrow.

(917) 460-5480 shit a military-trained assassin athlete mchottie must have a lot to prepare for mentally ill let u get ur rest

He smiled at the gesture. If only she knew.

(917) 308-3117 Send me a text when you get home. I want to make sure you arrived okay.

(917) 460-5480 such a gentleman! i don’t want to wake u if ur asleep tho

(917) 308-3117 I doubt I’ll be sleeping, but it’ll help ease my mind.

(917) 460-5480 alright ill shoot a text ttfn

(917) 308-3117 ttfn?

(917) 460-5480 ta ta for now god u r a grandpa

(917) 308-3117 Yeah, yeah

Bucky’s mouth split into yet, another grin as he set his phone down once again on the nightstand. He picked up his discarded book and found his place on the page. After a few minutes of re-reading the same paragraph over and over, he slipped the bookmark into the gutter of the book. His mind was too preoccupied with the thought of some random girl in the city at a boring work dinner. He realized he hadn’t stopped smiling since they temporarily said goodbye.

Maybe there was a good chance this conversation would carry into tomorrow.

CHAPTER TWO

[creacherkeeper]

ooh if ur up for elaborating ur hcs would u be down to expand on kristen's 'unit of cptsd w freckles'? also in the neurodivergence sector she adaine and fig all give me major adhd energy 👀 the bad kids....adhd autistic solidarity incarnate

i LOVE neurodivergence headcanons!! for me personally i hc adaine, riz, and gorgug as autistic, and fig and fabian as adhd (a friend said she sees her tourettes in gorgug which i think is valid too!!!). might type all that up formally at some point

kristen is just ... like yes all the bad kids for sure have gone through trauma, but i think kristens is pretty different in how it took shape. like she does have shitty, unaccepting parents, and the whole queer realization in a homophobic environment, but she also has the religious trauma at having been raised as the chosen one of a cult?? and i think that all just adds up. so for me its hard to get a read on her as autistic or adhd or anything like that because i think the cptsd just really forms a lot of things. like not everyone would agree, but as a long-time disability advocate who literally does this for a living (as a disability coach) i COMPLETELY see cptsd as a form of neurodivergence and think it can be just as influential on someones personality and behavior as anything else

like a lot of things i think you can read in a meta way about how ally plays her in freshman vs sophomore year or dice rolls and things like that, but im trying to just look at what we get in the story

like just looking at some of the categories of diagnosis of cptsd (and keeping in mind that symptoms of trauma frequently show up AFTER the victim is in a safe space and not while theyre still experiencing it):

affect and emotional regulation - shes FAR more outwardly emotional in s2, but also isnt very consistent about how those emotions present. like compare her super chill calm and detached demeanor in the mirror!riz fight versus her completely flipping out and sobbing and needing comfort after seeing kalina for the first time. like they definitely know a lot more by then but i think kalina is way less scary than a literal horror monster demon version of your friend?? also compare her behavior in s1 (mostly controlled and thoughtful with some occasional emotional outbursts) vs her in s2 seeming to have a much harder time with words, organizing her thoughts, communicating, reading other peoples emotions, responding ‘appropriately’, etc (some of which you can read as cognitive/executive functioning issues too)

attachment - has to actively figure her way out around boundaries (with tracker, sandra lynn, jawbone, the other bad kids) in a way that is a little more intensive than a healthy 17 year old

behavioral control - swings from being VERY self controlled and regulated (more than is healthy) to VERY loose with sexual activity (to the point of being inappropriate around others, even adults) and uses drugs, alcohol, and gets tattoos. definitely has some problems with impulse control (like okay the ribbon dancing out of a building was FUNNY but also. kristen ....,, and there are a lot more examples of this too)

self concept - i mean her whole religious journey in s2 kind of reflects this, but i think the best example is her spirit guardians. like the spirit guardians are a reflection of HER OWN ideology and beliefs and yet like?? theyre very critical and dismissive, even of kristen’s own person and choices? and tend to be very emotionally checked out of everything and encourage her to be as well. like a lot of the “sitting back sipping a cortado” persona tends to be reflective of the spirit guardians, but also the “trust nothing believe in nothing” which is indicative of a lot of self doubt and trust issues. and then like, with cassandra, there’s the LITERAL embracing of a lack of identity, of undefined personhood, and a lot of very risky choices in order to embrace doubt and unknowing (i think cassandra’s whole thing is pretty cool but i think it can come from a healthy or unhealthy place depending on the person, not saying which it was for kristen)

i think her not being able to tell where her cleric powers come from, something that like ??? is VERY inherent in the basic basic concept of what clerics are, could definitely be put under the “self concept” category but also may point to some sort of dissociative or depersonalization tendencies

anyway 8) did anyone ask for me to ramble for this long?? is this what yall wanted? woe, cpstd headcanons be upon ye

[crying-over-gay-dramas]

Whatre ur thoughts/opinions on Tonhon Chonlatee? I really like the side characters, but overall kind of has bad vibes imo. Like good discussion on toxic masculinity, but there are a lot of other issues that aren’t really taken seriously (like Neung almost assaulting Chon).

TW: S*xual ass*ult

Ah, prepare for a long response. I have a lot to say about Tonhon Chonlatee. So actually, this show covers a lot of topics. I really like this show so far because although it has the general appearance of a romantic comedy, with mostly silly humor it uses that purposely in order to provide social commentary. Often the problem with BL’s is that they don’t take things seriously. Romanticizing r*pe for one thing, is a serious problem, as well as other things. But Tonhon Chonlatee isn’t doing this. It’s doing a great job of using a humorous show to express things BL’s don’t often show. For example, they’ve humanized sex workers, tackled the idea of gender and sexual identity stereotypes. They took very masculine characters, made a point of categorizing them as manly through Thon’s comments, and revealed that they were gay. They even used Thon’s comments on how manly men aren’t gay whereas feminine men are, in order to point out that misconception of gay men. In reality appearance or attitude has nothing to do with sexuality. Covering toxic masculinity as well, as you said. I’ve seen many people expressing their dislike for having one of them main characters, Thon, be homophobic but that’s also part of the point they are trying to make. They eventually make a point of revealing that his prejudice was brought about by his father and the way he was raised, leaving him no room to figure things out for himself, or to discover that he himself could be gay or bisexual, etc. In creating such a situation for Thon’s character they’ve shown the effect upbringing an parenting can have on children. How prejudice can often get passed down, and affect people’s ways of thinking. I myself was raised in a very heteronormative household with a homophobic father, and although I was never homophobic myself I developed a stigma and internalized homophobia of sorts. When I first started questioning my sexuality I was a bit like Thon, a girl in middle school tried to hold my hand once and I flipped out, and the first time someone asked if I maybe was gay I flipped out. We rely a lot on our atmosphere growing up, and our beliefs can often end up reflecting our parents, or guardians. By showing Thon growing as a character, and slowly start to find himself and push off the prejudice brought upon by his father, I think is a beautiful thing. As for Neung trying to assault Chon, I disagree. I think they did take it seriously. Not the characters, of course since no one bothered to try to get Neung arrested or anything, but the show itself was making yet another point with that scene. If you remember, the ex girlfriend (I can’t be bothered to remember her name haha) told Neung that he should do the same thing to Chon that was done to him. This implies that in the past Neung himself was assaulted. The fact that the characters weren’t taking it that seriously was the point, sexual assault especially when it’s between men isn’t always taken seriously irl. This show reflected that with this scene. It’s meant to be that way, in order to make a point. As I said before Tonhon Chonlatee may seem like a simple series but it’s making some real points. Another was when Chon kissed Ton unconsentually during his sleep, This is another thing we see romanticized in BL. In this we had Chon’s mother directly telling Chon he was wrong to do that. No matter how good friends they are, or how in love Chon is with Ton, doing that is still wrong. The mom made that clear and that was such an important thing to express. 

Sorry for how long this was, but hopefully I was able to portray the points the show is making. Basically don’t look too close on the surface of Tonhon Chonlatee or you might miss the deeper points they’re trying to make :)

[aiwobonappetit]

gender crisis natsuki headcanon is confirmed now by me 😏 [explodes]i live to give him euphoria about his everything he deserves it 

*pic is there so i can find this post later when i need it 

me having nightly rabies under the cut 

so. yeah. why am i writing this all out? important ball ofc. 

tbh i just put more thought into how he processes his gender expression and experience and how he decided to just declare it himself. crying rn /j 

let me just. 

“ Mmm...I don't think it fits either.* I'm sorry, honey... I still feel like there's something in me that I want to express, whether it's through my clothes, my style, or even music. It's just...not only a manly feeling. “

*me asking him about how he feels about the label ‘agender’

“But I also loving feeling manly! Dad's taught me a lot about it and it still feels like an important part of me. But sometimes, I wonder what it's like to be something else. Like a switch! But also- the flip is quite slow and just depends on how I feel...”

“I'm sorry if that sounds confusing...”

“I'm just...I'm so happy! I didn't know you could be more than one thing at a time, or even nothing at all! I definitely feel like I'm a man and something else! But those two things exist together and not as separate identities...They're all me!“

-

ur probably thinking. [this fucking idiot bitch baby is putting too much effort into gender headcanon fucking LOSER whips and nae naes] (/lh) and yeah maybe i AM putting too much thought into smth a lot of ppl do for fun (idk how other ppl do this stuff but WHATEVER #LOLZ) 

im all or nothing w/ headcanons. and no-label [i do what feels right] natsuki is just. good. its great even! i lied, ITS WONDERFUL 

im doing it more out of a place of [i want natsuki to be happy as his true self because i know his mind is so expansive and reaches beyond social norms] rather than [i dont know what i am so i’ll project it onto my comfort character] (tho that is a good chunk of the catalyst for this) 

i know its not a big deal 🙄 but i dont want to throw this around lightly. identity is very important to the three of us and helping natsuki figure himself out in anything is smth i handle with extreme care and caution. i dont want to make him feel like he has to skip steps or do it a certain way. 

there was a very real warm-up and introduction to the idea and im very happy he was able to choose for himself in my mind instead of me pointing my finger and going “yes because i say so” i need the rational and realistic buildup of events and its reached its conclusion. ppl hc their f/os as x and y and z for their own reasons in their own ways. this is mine. 

i love natsuki always and if he changes then im right by him. i want him to love the body he’s in and the personality he blesses me everyday with. he’s my everything. 

[basket-of-radiants]

now that you've decided what nightblood is we can finally have the domestic au of ur dreams: two asshole roommates, their preteen children who won't stop bugging them, and their cat. and all those other losers i guess maybe

Oh my god, I was going through my very old asks, and how could I have missed this, this is literally the best thing ever, you’re right this is the domestic au of my dreams. Alright, here we go, a disaster family comprised of Szeth, Nale, Lift, Nightblood, and a cat. Actually a dog and two cats. Everyone’s backstory is basically the same, but they’re all retired now except for Nale. (And yes those other losers definitely all exist in this au, let me know who you care about.) 

If you’ll permit me to crib off of wtnv for a moment, Nale works for a vague yet menacing government agency wherein he has full authority to carry out whatever actions he deems necessary with zero oversight. He still works through legitimate bureaucratic channels whenever the need arises, but he has contacts in pretty much every institution willing to expedite paperwork for him with zero questions asked, and Nale has figured out that he can do pretty much anything legally so long as he knows what forms to ask for. He does. He’s basically memorized the entire legal code and memorized every obscure law and loophole in existence. Some didn’t think it literally possible for a brain to hold that much information, but he impresses. Nale’s actual job description is similarly unknown, but whatever it was before, it has unfortunately morphed into parole officer for a hitman, a thief, and a child with a criminal record that claims he’s a mass-murderer.

Szeth’s story is about what you’d expect. He knows a dozen languages and a hundred ways to kill a man. No one knows anything about him aside from the mysterious “assassin in white” suspected of carrying out multiple terrorist attacks and high-profile assassinations. I dunno, Szeth killed JFK or did 9/11 or some shit, wait no those aren’t modern enough examples, but he’s done some shit with that level of publicity and conspiracy. The kinds of crimes he pulls off are seemingly impossible to both perform and survive all the while escaping without his identity being revealed. He’s probably got a massive following in the serial killer fandom. Szeth lives his life following anonymous instructions sent to him remotely, and he keeps texting back for them to please stop making him do these things, and they don’t stop. He hates himself and wants to die, and he can’t for the life of himself figure out why no one’s stopped him yet. If only he weren’t such a criminal genius. One time he almost died and it was great, but then he woke up in a hospital to see a man and a kid waiting for him. Nale explained that he’d mined the data off of Szeth’s phone and knew everything about him, and complimented his criminal efficiency and his capability to follow orders so precisely. Basically he’d like to offer him a job. Szeth is like “wait seriously” because he’s still a murderer and Nale explains that from his phone history it’s clear that Szeth himself never had bad intentions, and it’s the thought that counts. Nale offers him a deal wherein Szeth will remain in his custody for a duration and work for him in exchange for no other legal recourse. His idea is to eventually make Szeth a field agent for his institution’s mysterious purposes, but for the time being Szeth really isn’t fit for that, so for the time being all he has to do is look after the kid.

Nale had intentionally sought out Szeth. (Everyone had, but he’d gotten to him first.) Lift on the other hand was a pure accident. After her mother died, Lift was resistant to entering the system, and so she hid from the government, surviving off of stealing food and clothes. When she got older, her shoplifting got a bit more bold. On her streets Lift is a legendary skater as well as being a pretty good thief. She and Nale crossed paths by accident, and she tried to steal his wallet without realizing who he was. Unfortunately she didn’t have her board on her at the time to do some sweet moves and then get out of dodge. He arrested her on the spot, but unfortunately his jurisdiction is different from that of normal police, and he had to file additional paperwork before he could hand her off to the local authorities. He took her to one of his local offices and handcuffed her to his desk while he filled out the papers. She kept making a bunch of requests for food and was so annoying about it that he acquiesced. Talking with her mouth full all the while, Lift completely dismantled his current psychological state, reduced him to tears, and hugged him, by which point he was a bit too attached to her to just arrest her. Still, she was a criminal whose whole lifestyle revolved around stealing, so he couldn’t just let her go, but he made her a deal and offered to take her into his personal custody instead of handing her over to the system. Lift was confident that it wouldn’t be too hard to run away from one person, and besides, it’d be funny to see how high she could get his grocery bills.

Nighblood is a pre-teen kid whose record ties him to hundreds of murders, none of which seem to be provable however. Nightblood mostly talks a lot and plays a lot of video games. Nale briefly looked into his past after he found him, but overall was too busy with his vague yet menacing government work to really focus on him. He decided it was best to keep the kid close, however. He didn’t have the time for babysitting either, but he would figure something out. Upon picking up Szeth, he found he was not psychologically fit for field work whatsoever, so he found another way to makes him useful while he was recovering. Nightblood also can’t move very well on his own, so Szeth has to stay with him at all times.

On the streets, there had been a dog that always followed Lift around. It was easily frightened by everything, and it would whine at her whenever she did something dangerous, but it always came back to her. Additionally, there is a cat that is incredibly shy and is pretty much only ever seen from afar, or off in a tree, or under something. For some reason Szeth refers to it as his cat. Nale apparently has a cat too, but no one has ever seen it, and he really doesn’t seem like an animal person, so it’s sort of hard to believe it actually exists.

Nale put up Szeth, Lift, and Nightblood up in his flat. Due to the mysterious nature of his work, he has to travel a lot, so typically it’s just Szeth and the kids. Szeth and Nightblood are always together, of course, because Nale said they had to be. Szeth will talk about his problems and Nightblood will show him the game he’s currently playing and will say “that’s really sad Szeth, but watch me do this cool move and destroy all these evil guys!” They talk a lot, that’s basically all they do these days. They’re both very fond of Lift, but she is understandably creeped out by two murderers, and she sneaks out of the house all the time. For her, yes her housemates are super messed up, but Nale stocks a lot of really good food and is barely ever around, so so long as she seems to be present and to be staying out of trouble, she can actually do as much trouble as she wants so long as she’s clever about it. One time as she’s sneaking out, she notices Szeth staring at her and she panics for a bit, but he’s like “no you can do what you want, I literally don’t care.” That ingratiates him slightly to her, so she does try to have conversations with him. He’s such a mess though. Nightblood offers to show her his video games, Lift is like “you think that’s cool, come outside and watch this” and then she does a flip on her skateboard or something. Nightblood has idolized her ever since.

When Nale is around, Lift bothers the hell out of him while Szeth follows him around doing pretty much whatever he asks of him while Nightblood keeps tugging on Szeth’s clothes and whispering questions to him. Ever since that first time with Lift, Nale has been unflinchingly stoic, but he lets Lift do whatever she wants and gives her anything she asks for. The same is true for Szeth and Nightblood as well, although Szeth tends not to make unreasonable requests, and whenever Nightblood is about to, Szeth whispers to him that maybe he shouldn’t bother Nale about it. So instead Nightblood bothers Szeth to ask Nale about it. Lift is just having fun exploiting this setup for all it’s worth. They’re all incredibly familiar with each other.

Basically this ends up as Nale being a super important government person with an unlimited budget which he ends up using to indefinitely house three criminals. Also in this au, Nale wears a suit, Szeth wears a hoodie, and Lift wears a baseball cap.

[vinylhazza]

imagine sending ur nudes to e by accident omg the next day he’d be imagining you naked and eventually you two fuck🥵

oh my gosh you would be lounging around talking to your best girl friend or something, often times sending her your risqué photos when you’re feeling down about yourself. she always has the best hype up messages when you’re feeling like a swamp creature. you’re really just pacifying your boredom from being stuck inside for a ridiculously long amount of time - not wanting to go into the sweltering heat of the upcoming summer. you had a habit of overheating and making yourself sick.

usually you’re good at looking at the contact name before you send something so exposed to her, giving yourself the comfirmation before hitting send. but today just had to be the one day your finger hit the send button too fast, your eyes flicking up in panick mode to read “E ❤️” at the top of the screen.

fuck. 

you’re sitting on your bed at this point hyperventilating, about to pass out, dizzy as hell, nauseous, genuinely not good. you’d never sent him anything like those pictures before. and that was the thing, it wasn’t just one it was several pictures of your naked body to your best guy friend. you’re very hot, best guy friend. you look over the set of photos you’d sent: you’re laying back on your bed in nothing but a pair of black lace panties, breasts on display, sunlight trickling across your abdomen and perky nipples, a golden glow touching your skin. the panties were honestly nothing but a piece of pathetic fabric that could be compared to dental floss - you know if you turned around you’re ass would be bare as it could be. 

you never had any intention of sending them to anyone - as your not speaking to anyone romantically at the moment. truth is you’ve been hooked on a certain someone for a while. the same certain someone you just accidentally sent your nudes to. how convenient.

honestly i imagine him to be shell-shocked. maybe he was mid-conversation with grayson, unlocked his phone at your notification, and sat frozen and speechless while he stared down at the screen - your breasts sitting pretty for his eyes only. grayson would be pausing at his silence, questioning him on why he’s sitting there like he’s “waiting to catch flies” in his mouth. ethans cheeks would heat to an unbearable temperature, not believing what he’s seeing - his best friend - naked and biting the tip of her fingernail.

throuought both the day and night you hear no response from ethan, total dead silence. it made you more nervous than if we were to send back a simple “wrong number?” or “huh?” ...silence. did he like it? did he hate it? did he just not see it? you knew better than that judging at the read receipt that stared you in the face on the screen, only making you heart race faster. 

it was a night of little sleep for the both of you, neither one knowing of the filthy thoughts running through the others head. ethan tossed and turned in his bed that night, knowing he would see you tomorrow for session with grayson. you’re a personal trainer, hence how you met and became so close with the twins. it had been a year since you started working with grayson, not really seeing the reason because he already was well off, as well as ethan. but you never made a complaint, helping and instructing anyway that you can. you became friends instantly, most of the time making it a hangout session rather than a trainer/trainee situation. 

you had kept your eyes on ethan since the day you showed up at their house for the first session, breath caught in your throat when he opened up the door with a dazzling smile, lips stretched tight across his teeth. he was gorgeous, you wouldn't deny that. yes, grayson was handsome, and yes they were identical twins - but you fell in love with ethans heart quickly. nothing ever came from it, teasing, friendly banter. it was strictly friends. but you’d always felt something brewing beneath the surface, too scared to let him know you wanted something more. head over heels was an understatement. shit the guy couldn't even hug you without your heart doing flips inside of your head. 

you’d given up hope about a month ago, bummed out that despite your subtle advances, he was a lost cause. he showed his love in his own way, trying his hardest to make you see he felt it, he felt all of it. lost in translation, your love was. the hugs became less frequent, the teasing still showed up, but less flirty. it broke him bit by bit until he finally accepted that he’d lost something he never really had in the first place. he backed off, tried to discipline himself to think of you as just a friend - until those pictures popped up on his phone. 

there he was, laying in bed with his hand wrapped around himself, eyes glued to the picture of your perky breasts, god you were gorgeous. fuck the plan, he thought, tugging up and down his length with a tight fist - trying to keep quiet in fear of grayson hearing him. across town, you were doing the same - rubbing a hand at your mound, thinking of him thinking about you. you had no knowledge of it actually being true, but just the thought of him seeing you so exposed and dare you say sexy in a set of photos really did something to you. 

the next day was terrifying for both of you, neither wanting to mention your little accident first, both wanted to play dumb and just hope it disappeared in time. 

until you caught up watching you during your squats, not in a way he has ever before, his eyes were drinking you in. in a hungry way. not observant, not innocent, but dirty. you tried to ignore the wetness in between your thighs, keeping your eyes on grayson, watching his form, telling him to straighten up every so often, cracking a joke in hopes it would get ethan to stop staring at you and laugh along. but he kept his eyes focused on you, knuckles white on the edge of the bench he sat on. 

okay, if he wants to stare, so will you. 

turning your head to look at him was a bold move, his eyes focusing on your mouth instead of your chest - his bottom lip popping free from his teeth. was he, checking you out? he’d never been so bold about it before. you watched each other close while you continued your squats, eyes trained on his the entire time. you thanked the heavens you put your hair in a ponytail, it was far too hot in this gym and you knew you would look like a monster if your hair was any other way.

“okay...fuck...my legs feel like jello,” grayson giggles, plopping onto his butt after hitting just above 300 squats. you would never recommend doing that many, but he had a weird goal in mind, so you figured if he was going to do it, might as well help him doing it the correct and healthy way. 

“mine too,” you agreed, sitting down yourself. with your face as red as ever with ethan’s eyes staring at you, you took a sip from your water bottle, smiling at the cold water traveling down your throat. it felt good to have a hard workout. 

“I think i’m going to eat something before we go again, you want something?” grayson’s offering his hand to you, nodding when you shake your head to turn him down. if you ate now you might throw up from the nerves running like crazy through your body, your stomach a pit of butterflies. not the best idea to shove food into the mix. 

“i’ll catch up with you in a bit,” ethan speaks up, watching his brother leave the room before turning his eyes back on you. 

“so are we really gonna talk about it or are you just gonna stare at me like you've never seen tits before?” bold move. 

“why did you send them to me? that is what I wanna know.” he ignores your question, coming back with his own. 

“accident.”

“lie,” he challenges you with a cocky smirk, raising from his position on the bench, 

“I meant to send them to Amanda, not you, don't get cocky,” you’re really testing the waters, knowing damn well everything spilling from your mouth is a load of bullshit. even Amanda, whom you told of your little mishap, screamed blood murder over the phone, insisting the mistake was in fact fate and not happenstance. 

he’s still smirking, standing tall in front of you. he had been pretty much silent through the workout with grayson, off on his own most of the time. you didn't mind, knowing it was probably weird for him at least for now. so you let him be, focusing on grayson for the rest of the day. but this...this was new.  

“you’re awfully bold for someone that showed no interest in me any other time,” you point out, shrugging like you made the most valid point ever. 

“maybe you read the signs wrong babe.” that fucking pet name. 

“i’m pretty sure I didn't. anyways why does it matter? it was a mistake and now we can forget about it and move on know that we’ve acknowledged it,” you nod to yourself. it seems fair considering you're about to burst into flames at how close he’s standing to you. you know deep down you’ll never be able to forget about it. 

“I don't think I want to,” he mutters, his seductive tone taking your breath away. looking up at him, only caused your heart to beat faster, he looked serious. you’ve never heard his voice so calm. 

“well...you have to. we are bestfriends,” you stutter, standing to your feet in an attempt to back away. 

“best friends who like each other,” he drones on, keeping his eyes locked steady on yours. 

“fat chance.”

“best friends who want to fuck each other...” he’s inching closer, grabbing at the bare skin of your waist to bring himself closer to you. you almost scream in surprised as his hand comes to clamp over your mouth, arm reaching behind you to crack the door open, staring into the hallway with that same devilish smirk. 

“hey gray?!” he shouts, hand still cupped over your mouth. his other hand returns to your side, thumb rubbing back and forth across your skin. you’re surprised at the reaction from your body, your pussy clenching tightly around nothing, the aching becomes less bearable. 

“yeah?” his voice echoes from down the hallway, sounding busy and disinterested. 

“I think we are out of almond milk, you mind running to the store real quick? please?” his tone has switched to one you know well, the one he uses when he tries to manipulate his little brother into getting his way. you would swat at him if his fingers weren't dancing along the inside of your thigh right now, dangerously close to your clothed heat. 

“why can't you?” grayson whines, still far enough down the hallway he couldn't see into the room. if he could...i’m sure he would be just as confused as you are. 

“because I asked you,” he points out, chuckling at the annoyed groan he gets in return. 

“you paying?” 

“it’s not like we have the same bank account or anything fuck face. but you want to use my card it’s in my wallet on the counter. thank you bro.” with that he’s shutting the door, with his hand still moving between your legs, he removes his other from your mouth, instead wrapping it in your hair - loosening your ponytail. 

“look at you...so small and innocent...like you didn't send me filthy pictures of you last night,” he hums, leaning close to kiss at your neck, “i bet you touched yourself at the thought of me looking at them huh?” he whispers hot in your ear, tongue poking out to lick at your lobe slowly, sucking it into his mouth before it pops free. 

you are drenched, not registering the nod you give him, wanting to slap yourself for being so easy. 

“so are we done pretending or do i need to convince you more? he won’t be gone forever.” his fingers cup your cunt through your leggings, rubbing his fingers across you to cause a friction that makes you tense in his arms, grasping at his biceps in shock. his hands feel much better than your own. 

you realize how quickly you’re grabbing at the back of his neck too late, bringing him down to seal your lips together perfectly. the kiss is passionate, more passionate that it really should be for being so sudden. it was filled with longing and need, something you’ve been experiencing towards him for quite some time.

he is sighing against your lips, shuddering at how good your skin feels under his fingertips, hungry for more than just a kiss.

he’s growing frustrated quickly, stopping with a huff and holding your face close.

“i wanna talk, i do, about what the fuck is going on. but i can’t wait...need you now,” he explains, eyes never breaking away from your own. you understand his need perfectly, it matches with your own. 

“we can talk later,” you nod at him, seemingly giving him the green light to pick you up by your hips with a squeal falling from your mouth. your back meets the semi-plush cushion of the bench press, staring up at your bestfriend hovering dangerously close to your face. he’s got this smile you’ve only ever seen a few times, when he’s so utterly happy he can’t contain himself. it makes you melt to think that this is one of those moments for him. with a quick peck to your lips, he’s lowering down onto his knees, hooking his fingers in the waistband of your leggings, pulling down slowly. 

“for the meantime...gonna fuck you so good.” 

[ardenttheories]

I don't expect a super serious answer from this, but I'm just curious. in a perfect world, how would hs^2 be written? do you have any particular headcanons or plot lines that would be interesting to explore? I understand the hesitation in answering a question like this, because other people might try to discredit your critiques under the guise of "well its not ur headcanons so that's why ur mad". anyways, just curious because I respect your perspective and ideas

In complete honesty? The first thing I would consider vital is a diverse team of people - genuinely diverse - to consider every point of representation with. I’m talking people of different races (to avoid the anti-black coding of Gamzee), with mental illnesses (to avoid the ableism in both Gamzee and Dirk), with different gender identities (to more accurately and healthily portray Jade, Roxy, Vriska, June - any character we could feasibly want to make trans or nonbinary), with different romanticisms and sexualities (so that we could write genuine MLM and WLW relationships without falling into homophobic pitfalls; to avoid biphobic stereotypes), and overall, with different traumatic experiences and triggers (so that we could more accurately gauge what triggers would need to be tagged and how to go over them in an appropriate and respectful manner).

We could never be 100% perfect, but with a team like that, we could at least get close to it. 

Additionally, I’d bring back either fan prompts or closely listen to fan theories and conversations. Homestuck^2 was touted to be written with the fandom in mind; to consider the direction we were asking it to go in, while basing it around a general barebones structure. I’d want to make sure we were including as much of that in as humanly possible. So, if a fan theory seemed like it’d fit into the story? I’d want to include that with the rest of the text; if the fans liked a specific character? I’d want to try and include them more often. Little things to show that we’re listening and that we’re writing the story WITH the fans - like how early Homestuck used to be.

On an actual storyline basis, I really do love the concept of Meat and Candy; that there’s one timeline that goes off the rails and one that is very rigidly stuck to a track. I wouldn’t want to change that concept entirely, but I would want to make it more palpatable for people to read. 

This would mean, for me, absolutely getting rid of anything to do with Yiffany. I’d completely replace that with Dave and Jade having a child together via ectobiology; how Jade has to raise their child in Dave’s absence after he goes missing, how that affects her, who she turns to for comfort and help. 

I’d want to focus Candy more on that feeling of helplessness and dissociation. On John feeling adrift in a world that doesn’t quite connect with him, that doesn’t entirely feel real; how that would affect his relationships, his friends, his family. In this timeline, all of the rebellion stuff would be completely background to the interpersonal connections everyone has (the things that supposedly don’t matter, as is the point of Candy), with much more emphasis on how useless and frivolous the whole war is. It’d get to a point where nobody actually knows why they’re fighting anymore except for the fact that they are, and that even Jane, who started it out of a genuine fear for the human race, is getting tired of it, is losing resources, is starting to realise that she’s drifting away from her own child. 

A truce would be garnered, started by Jane who just very much wants to reconnect with her son, with Karkat taking on the role as troll emissiary. It features long talks in a large, empty room, pouring over papers, where Jane admits that she doesn’t actually know what anyone is up to these days, how long it’s been since she’s seen her husband, since she’s seen John, and Karkat quietly confesses that it’s been several years since he’s seen Dave or Jade, and that he misses them both. 

After that, a lot of the content of Candy would focus on healing. They would get back to their happily ever after, even though some things would never be the same, and there would still be inconsequentialities. It would also correspond with John coming to the slow realisation that he really doesn’t need a plot to be happy at all; that just because it doesn’t matter to the overarching story doesn’t mean it can’t matter to him. 

The Candy timeline, therefore, would close early; it would fade from our view just as Dirk feared, but it would be happy and content, and free from any further meddling. I’d essentially want to enforce this idea that, yes, we can still have happy endings - even if they aren’t “full of meaning”. They can still be satisfying.

The Meat timeline, on the other hand, would have a significant focus on Dirk and his attempts to continue the plot. I think it would be fun, admittedly, if nothing went the way he thought it would. That after all of his villany and his acceptance of destruction in order to facilitate something he thought would be better, he actually just lost complete and utter control. 

The plot isn’t something that he alone can continue. It’s created with character conflict, with motivations and rises and falls and losses and gains; trying to recreate SBURB, to try and restart the cycle, isn’t what a plot needs to be. It isn’t what he thinks it will do. 

I’m unsure if you’ve seen this recently, but there’s been a lot of fanwork around the Lord!Jake English idea that went around several years back (when people saw the Caliborn sona). Now, this I’d want to put into it. 

Jake, fed up with being stepped on, walked over, hurt, suffering from the trauma of being completely and utterly ruined by Dirk, absolutely flips shit. He chases after Dirk to seek revenge, to cut short whatever bullshit he’s trying to do, and therefore much of the comic becomes this constant back and forth with an increasing fear for Dirk the closer Jake gets as he traverses Paradox Space.

It’s very much clear that when Jake arrives, Dirk will lose. There’s no question about it. Nobody suggests that anything else will happen. There’s several arguments on Meat’s Earth C over whether or not they should try to stop Jake, or let him stop Dirk - and whether or not Jake will calm down afterwards or continue his rampage. 

In the end, Dirk fails. Jake catches up to him, and just before he hits the killing blow, the entire thing goes dark. Our narrator dead, the plot abandoned; there is nothing more to see. This I would want to use to enforce the idea that, yes, plot can still be satisfying as hell and still have integral moments and be heavy and harsh - but it can also end in a way that leaves open questions because that shows that it isn’t the best ending you can get. 

And then we jump back to Terezi, using her Seer powers. Both timelines have been her trying to use her powers to See what’s in store, where she should go, what she should do. She’s still floating through Paradox Space, looking for Vriska, and as such she’s met with this... sort of internal dilemma. 

She knows, now, that the chances of her dying out here are high. She also knows that even if she does survive, she’s pretty much never going to see Vriska again anyway. She knows there’s a chance at a happier relationship with John, and that the only way she can get that is if she somehow manages to make a timeline where Meat and Candy merge together at once. 

So, she flies back. She manages to arrive on Earth C the day of John’s big decision, and interrupts him before he can go to the picnic. Through their dialogue, John gets it stuck in his head that, hey, there’s something BIGGER out here that you need to do, but you need to do that amazing thing again where you make a third Choice.

When John arrives at the picnic, he decides to eat some of the pumpkin instead - to which you might be thinking, what pumpkin? The one he put there, of course, using his retcon powers.

So we start on the Pumpkin timeline, written entirely in the 1st person narrative from John’s POV. It’s a completely biased interpretation of what’s going on, but it’s honest to John’s own thoughts and feelings, too, allowing everyone to act the way they usually would do without any influence, but still having a narrative touch. 

It shows John actively fighting to free the timeline from Dirk’s and Alternate Calliope’s narrative controls, those little hooks they’ve planted in it since time began, with a lot of back-and-forth as the two talk to John through the narration (which, he hears their voices as thoughts in his head). 

John attempts to free them both from their own biases and chains, encouraging Alternate!Calliope to leave the space she’s isolated herself in and join Earth C while convincing Dirk to undo the bullshit villain schtick he’s on (and that plot or no plot, there’s still a reason worth living for). 

It’d be a timeline filled with references back to original Homestuck (and funny quips from both Alternate!Calliope and Dirk along the way), a lot of morality discussion, plenty of theorising on narrative control and arcs and the placement of plot and fluff in a satisfying story, and have plenty of representation and romance and hints towards kids, too (such as nonbinary RoxyJaneCallie, DaveJadeKat, aromantic Jake, JohnDirk [because I couldn’t stop myself, honestly, with how their Classpects work so well hand in hand], and definitely RoseMary being the first to adopt a child that they absolutely do not call Vriska). 

It’d fill plotholes the fandom wants to be filled, and it’d have drama, of course, in the form of figuring out a way to destroy Lord English that doesn’t inherently lead to the Candy timeline. But it’d go back and forth between the heavy, plot-filled moments and the slower, relationship-based moments, with more humanising and development of Dirk and Alternate!Calliope and John as rounded characters.

That’s the best my tired mind can come up with right now. It’s something I’ve daydreamed about a lot, actually; how I’d rewrite Homestuck^2, or what my own ending to Homestuck would be using it as a foundation. I hope it makes sense! It’s a fun little thought experiment, honestly.

[cryptocism]

ive been scrolling through ur blog for a while (cuz ur dc opinions are Top Fucking Notch) and i saw what you said abt bart in tt 03 and f:fma and while i totally agree (it killed tt 03 for me lol) im super curious abt how youd do his development if given the opportunity?

I’ve been thinking about this one like A Lot so buckle up this is long: 

it would kind of depend? On whether or not he’d be in an ensemble team like Teen Titans or with his own solo series. 

I understand metatextually why he became Kid Flash in TT, since they needed him to be more mature and a more recognizable character and having him upgrade costumes/codenames is a good shortcut for both. But I’ve already talked about why it didn’t sit right with me. 

So, lets flip the script a little bit - the start of TT would be largely the same. Our boy Bart is on the new Titans team, and things are kind of awkward after YJ disbanded, also Max is gone and Bart’s relationship with Wally is still not doing great. Things are rough, Bart has newfound doubts to deal with, especially now that the world seems to have gotten harsher and everyone seems to have a lot less patience to deal with him. The pressure to be more mature and a recognizable character is coming from other characters now rather than an authorial need: he’s reminded to take things seriously, or that he should know better by now, that he needs to slow down and think more. So Bart decides a change is necessary, and we get the library scene. He reads all the books, he reappears as Kid Flash, saves Tim via bullet catch, disassembles a gun, takes down Slade, etc. etc. Here’s my departure from canon though: it doesn’t work. 

Kid Flash is not a solution, or a magical cure for immaturity. Reading a whole library so he’s miraculously smarter and more mature and capable is, at its core, a pretty naive conclusion. And it makes sense he would think that. But it doesn’t work. He’s still impulsive, distractible, hasty. He can’t put a lid on his own sense of humor. People still think he’s annoying or lazy or careless. And he keeps trying - he knows all this stuff now, he read a whole library! - but he’s still apparently too much the same person as he's always been. And even though he’s trying very hard to live up to the Kid Flash name, it still doesn’t feel like him. Wally doesn’t like it, since Bart is literally just imitating him now, which makes things between the two even worse. And Bart keeps worrying about what’s supposed to come afterwards, since “Kid Flash” is inherently temporary, and while Impulse was only peripherally related to the flash legacy, Kid Flash comes with expectations. 

Bart is trying very very hard to be ‘grown up’ and ‘mature’, but he hasn’t actually learned anything other than a bunch of facts (which are still useful, but) he’s just trying to be who everyone expects him to be. 

And this is what i mean about the ensemble thing, because this arc would be in conversation with the rest of the core four, who are also trying very hard to be people they’re not, but all in different ways. Bart obviously with the codename change, but Cassie, Tim, and Kon all have similar issues, they’re all trying to imitate people. 

Tim is doing his Batman jr. routine, reverting back to the persona he had at the start of YJ. He’s cagey and mysterious and does questionable things without telling anybody, because he’s de-facto leader of the team again, and he has to be better than he is. No more kid stuff, the Titans are serious, he has to treat it like a job, not like a sleepover. And this whole act is putting distance between him and his friends. 

Cassie is trying her hardest to put herself in a support role. Donna’s gone and she has some big shoes to fill (she and Tim could probably bond about that if he weren’t stubbornly trying to brood at all hours of the day) and she’s doing her best to just Be Donna. Cassie and Tim would work better with their team roles swapped, and they both sort of know this - Cassie is naturally charismatic, thinks on her feet, can maintain good PR, and when she’s confident in herself is great at leading. Tim is partial to planning ahead, secrets, and keeping in the shadows, and is better at being a confidant and emotional problem solver among the team (when he allows himself to be open among friends, that is). 

But they’re both trying to fit themselves into what they see as pre-ordained roles: Robin is leader, Wondergirl is a supportive mediator. But Cassie’s got a temper and little patience for people being idiots, and Tim’s not predisposed to spotlights. 

Kon on the other hand has a story that’s less about who he should be and more who he shouldn’t be. The Lex Luthor dad storyline is here (minus the mind control shit, although the threat of it is still brought up) and Kon is doing his level best to do nothing that could be interpreted as something Lex might do. While everyone is doing their best to Not be their own person, Kon has no idea if he ever was his own person. He’s questioning everything he does, wondering if it’s some kind of evil gene showing through when he’s angry or petty or selfish. He’s going through lots of clone angst. 

So they’re all dealing with expectations and who they are or aren’t supposed to be, trying to fit themselves into boxes that don’t suit them and then convincing themselves that this is how it ought to be. Kon ought to avoid feeling or acting in any negative light because any sign of Luthor is a sign of evil, Cassie ought to tone herself down and act like Donna, Tim ought to step up and lead the team and act like Dick, and Bart ought to listen better and be smarter and slow down and grow up and do his level best to just Be Wally. 

Throughout the issues they’d all get a spotlight on their various crises, taking them through complimenting character arcs. Kon would realize through a couple close encounters and chats with ma and pa and talks with his friends and citizens of metropolis that nobody is all good or all bad. Clark can be a real asshole sometimes and Luthor’s actually done a fair bit of good (usually in his own interests, but still we’re gunning for nuance). Turns out he doesn’t have a dark side to be tempted by, he was made from 50% complex person and 50% complex person, just like everyone else. Which means he isn’t destined to be the next Superman, or Superman’s next supervillain. He’s just like, a person. With his own thoughts and feelings that have nothing to do with genetics. 

Tim would wear himself out and hide it from everybody until he killed himself, but it’s only when he sees Cassie also wearing herself out too that his ‘somebody needs somebody’ instincts kick in and they’re actually able to talk about how miserable they both are. Through some trial and error they’re able to figure out a good co-leader system for leading the team, having each other’s backs along the way, which allows for them both being able to help out the other members of their team with their own shit i.e. Kon and Bart’s identity issues. 

Bart is, like Cassie and Tim, wearing himself out trying to be this perfect version of Wally that never actually existed. He actually hates the recognition the new name gives him, because people have expectations for him now, ones he can never seem to live up to. He’s bad at following orders still, which makes him a pretty shit sidekick for Wally, in fact he’s just pretty shit at being a sidekick in general. But, he reasons, he’s supposed to be grown up and responsible now, and responsibility is all about doing shit you hate until you die, so he’s probably on the right track. 

It’s only later, once he gets some support from his friends, who help him deal with things like Max and YJ disbanding and stuff that he’s able to actually sit down and have a heart-to-heart with Wally. Wally confesses that he understands the pressure to live up to a legacy, and how he did his best to just Be Barry when he became the flash. In fact while Bart was trying to live up to Wally and be a good sidekick, Wally was trying to live up to Barry and be a good mentor. Wally’s the one to tell him that Bart’s always done his own thing, and is at his best when he does. They both agree they suck as partners, but maybe they should’ve tried to be family first. And there’s probably a racing metaphor in there somewhere because speedsters love their racing metaphors. 

ANyway Bart returns to Impulse, forging a new path, getting along better with Wally now and hanging out with him just as civilians with no pretense. He learns some valuable lessons about how maturity can’t be learned in a book, and that he’ll get it himself the more he lives and learns from experience. The Titans all get along better now that they’re all sure of their places in the group, and they can all go on just being themselves without worrying about expectations or roles to fill or whatever. 

...If Bart still had his solo series instead though, id actually want it to go in a sort of different direction? The thing about living up to predecessors and trying to be some ideal version of another person works well for the Titans because they can all deal with a similar issue in different ways, but I think it would also be interesting to do the complete opposite. 

Lots of shitty things happened in very quick succession in Bart’s life that he had no control over: Max’s disappearance, having to move in with Jay and Joan (who are nice, but whom he barely knows,) leaving his friends in Alabama, Young Justice breaking up… Basically, things kind of suck for Bart, and all he wants is for them to go back to the way they were. Instead of trying to be grown up or mature or whatever, Bart is resisting every single encroaching thing about coming adulthood. Because all growing up ever seems to mean is that everything changes and either you have to leave the people you love or they have to leave you. 

So this series would focus mostly on that, both in his civilian life; going into high school, not knowing anybody, the few friends he does make are less interested in ‘kid stuff’ and more focused on dating and interpersonal drama, high school itself seems to be geared entirely toward the “what are you going to do with your life” question, when he visits his old friends back in manchester, they’ve all kind of grown up without him. And in hero life; everyone from Young Justice is trying to move on and not talking to each other, his father figure and mentor is gone and he's not really jiving well with the rest of the flash family, and people just seem to have less patience for Impulse now that he’s older. 

Growing up is hard. It’s hard and no one understands. Especially not when you’re also a superhero and have dealt with some quality trauma like losing loved ones and feeling yourself die. So it makes sense that Bart would resist that in every way possible, do his best to pretend like everything is still how it used to be, for once in his life just trying to make everything stay put. He refuses to get rid of his old stuff, he doesn’t want to treat any villainous threats seriously, people in school keep talking about college and jobs and tuition fees and Bart wants none of that, he acts out, refuses responsibility, gets reckless under the pretense that he never used to have to be cautious. 

And this is the part where I’d bring in Inertia, cause Thad was robbed and I want him to have an actual arc that doesn’t end with infant-splosion. Also he can have a good ol companion arc to Bart. Welcome to foils everybody, where two identical boys with opposing life experiences get to thematically compare and contrast with each other as they deal with the trials and tribulations of growing up. 

So, I’m ignoring every appearance Thad ever made after Impulse 1995, picking up instead where his story left off where he swore vengeance on his creators and disappeared into the speed force. And he’s off to do exactly what he said; Thad Thawne II is going to kill his namesake/grandfather/creator - the president of Earthgov. 

But, turns out assassinating the president of a whole fucking planet is a lot harder than he thought - Thad has planned extensively for every moment of his life, so once he starts going off script things predictably go a little off the fuckin rails. Thad fails, obviously. For one because despite how much President Thawne might deserve to die, Thad at this point hasn’t done anything worse than attempted murder, and making him a killer would put a wrench in any kind of redemption arc he could have. Also he’s acting on rage, in a highly emotional state, basically going up against the entire government. Of course he’s going to get caught by the science police and brought into custody. 

Bart, meanwhile is jumping with both feet into any kind of escapism he can find, which involves various time travel shenanigans and lands him in the 30th century. He gets to reunite however briefly with his mom, but the mission he had gets derailed by the appearance of Inertia. 

Every time Bart and President Thawne interact, the president always seems to make a bid to sway Bart to the Thawne side. This never works, which is part of the reason Inertia exists in the first place; a version of Bart that the president could control. When Inertia landed in the 30th century, hell bent on assassinating his creator, the President subdued him and eventually coerced him back over to the Thawne side of the family feud. No longer a rogue agent, Inertia is back to his old self, all about destroying Bart and the rest of the Allens. 

They have a battle, taking place all over the 30th century city, and Bart does his best but Inertia has the entire Earthgov police force on his side, and Bart eventually gets captured. He gets taken to some kind of holding facility, meets with the President who monologues as him while Inertia stands beside him like a good lackey. Then suddenly the speed-inhibiting cuffs or whatever Inertia had put on Bart to stop his speed malfunctions, and Inertia drops the act, now Impulse and Inertia working together to take down the Earthgov people holding them there. 

Turns out as soon as Inertia knew he couldn’t take out the president, what with all the military force President Thawne had on his side, he bided his time until he could. He uses Bart’s help to finally get President Thawne cornered, and the assassination plan is back on track. Except now Bart is the thing stopping him. He makes the argument about how murder bad. Heroes don’t kill, etc. Inertia insists he isn’t a hero. But Bart reminds him that that’s not how Max saw him. 

Inertia hesitates just enough that President Thawne is able to get away, and now the two of them have to make an escape attempt back to the past. Bart insists on trying to take Meloni with them, and they try but ultimately fail somehow (maybe someone has to stay behind to make sure they can make the trip safely, idk. At first Thad is willing to stay behind, since there’s nothing really for him in the past. But Meloni knows that President Thawne would destroy him if he did, and she can’t let harm come to either of her sons - and she does consider Thad her son, just like Bart. She’s had far too little time with either of them, but she loves them all the same. She tells them to take care of each other, and is the first to encourage them to be like, actual brothers.) 

After yet another tearful goodbye, Bart swearing he’ll find a way for them to all be together again, Bart and Thad go back. And they do end up having to lean on each other, because shit’s tough for the both of them. Thad initially wants to apologize and possibly reunite with Max and Helen, and then finds out Max is gone. And Bart has someone who understands exactly what he’s going through. 

Things get a little more lighthearted from here. Bart and Thad don’t get along well at first, since they’re both going through rough times and lots of changes and their first instincts are to lash out at each other. But eventually they form a sort of camaraderie through shared grief, then shared fish-out-of-water experiences. Which evolves into shared inside jokes and video games and comic books and they become slow but steady friends. 

They upgrade into brothers when Bart defends Thad against the repeated (and not entirely undeserved) suspicion he receives from the rest of the Flash family. Jay and Joan take him in, but it’s clear they don’t trust him, and neither does Wally. Bart stands up for Thad, arguing that he’s as much of a Thawne as Thad is, and treating Thad like he’s the next Cobalt Blue is just going to ensure that history never changes and stupid family feuds are forever. After this, Thad starts trusting Bart a little more, and kind of solves Bart’s problems regarding encroaching adulthood with his friendship. Neither of them really had a childhood, and Thad hasn’t experienced 21st century life at all, much less the societal expectations to grow up. So Bart gets to have fun again, and Thad won't judge any of his games or his books or his attitude or interests for being childish or lame because he’s fascinated by the experience of anything regardless of the target audience. 

And from there it's a series about these two becoming brothers and growing up and the different lessons they learn and wacky characters they meet along the way. Thad ironically also puts Bart in a position where he has to take on more responsibility, since even though Thad can imitate heroic actions and is actually pretty good at it, he doesn’t understand what makes them heroic. Bart has to draw on a lot of the things Max taught him and now has to teach them to Thad. 

There’s crossover comics with Superboy, where Bart laments about having to deal with grown up stuff, and Kon gives him a new perspective on the whole “being young forever” thing, since that was a reality Kon actually had to deal with and it sucked. 

Through various misadventures they meet new and familiar characters to give them different perspectives on the whole passage of time thing. Villains who despise children or childish things, villains who embrace it but probably too much. People who talk about growing up as the worst time of their lives, others talking about it like it was the best. Kids and adults alike trying to force Bart and Thad to act a certain way while treating them another. 

The two of them come to opposing conclusions about this; Thad wants to embrace change completely, partly because he wants to experience firsthand all that life has to offer, but also his worldview depends on believing that anyone can change, and anyone can be better, because he has to believe he can be redeemed for all the shitty stuff he did. Bart, on the other hand, knows his life isn’t perfect but thinks, based on recent events, that it’s all just going to get worse from here, and so resists change as much as possible. 

Thad, in his haste to experience everything, sometimes ends up going too far, either burning both of them out, or pushing them into situations that they’re not ready for or are ill-equipped to handle. Bart, on the other hand is so resistant to change or responsibility that he stops them from doing actual necessary things like planning their futures or doing chores or making new friends. This acts as the crux for their main conflict that slowly builds throughout the series, and then in a finale to the arc, they both figure out a way to get Meloni back to the past, and to raise some stakes they have a falling out in the middle of the mission about it. 

Bart accuses Thad of trying to leave him behind, or trying to be the better version of him again, and that old insecurity about Thad replacing him crops up. Thad thinks Bart just can’t handle anything outside his personal bubble and wants to force him to live in the real world. Plus he also feels kind of abandoned by Bart, who often would leave Thad to do the scary adult things on his own. 

Tensions still high, there's suddenly an external threat to deal with - probably president thawne and the science police - and they attempt to continue arguing even while fighting the president. I’m making this up as I go so lets say yada yada big climactic moment it's looking like the two might fail to get Meloni back and they’re both still angry with each other and Bart just… can’t take it anymore. 

He keeps losing people, and the ones he keeps he always seems to screw up with. And at the end of the day he’s just a kid who wants his mom. Is that really so much to ask? So there’s a reversal, a parallel, if you will, of the assassination attempt from the beginning of the series, this time with Bart. Or, because I don’t think many people would buy that Bart would actually ever for real kill someone, maybe he’s finally about to get his mom back, but she doesn’t want to go (since she made that deal with the president that he wouldn’t harm anyone of the Allen family so long as she stayed with him) so he’s trying to force her, risking the lives/well-being of the entire Allen bloodline across all of time. 

This time it’s Thad who has to talk him down, who has to remind him about being a hero, who has to remind him that trying to go back to some magical time in the past where things were better is just going to stop him from learning and growing as a person, and that doing anything and everything possible to get there is just going to lead to Bart doing something he Actually Can’t walk back from. 

Alright but here’s the thing because having Bart be forced to leave his mom again for like the billionth time is tired and overdone, and personally the whole message about heroics involving extreme and damaging amounts of sacrifice can only go so far. So here; Thad and Bart are both right. 

Like on the one hand, yeah, it’s childish and selfish for Bart to want to be with his mom at the expense of literally everyone else in his family. On the other hand, the fact that they can’t be together because some asshole is upholding a stupid grudge is bad and unfair and wrong. The issue needing to be fixed is not the kid who wants his mom, it’s the jackass keeping them apart (and who also wants to kill/imprison people). So Bart convinces Thad that they have to save Meloni, and Thad convinces Bart that there has to be another way - one where they get their mom back and the Allens don’t have to be hunted. 

The whole story would be leading up to the two of them coming to this conclusion; the healthy middle between the two extremes. Where they have the maturity to plan ahead and sort through their differences and figure out the best course of action with the least amount of collateral, but they don’t let go of that adolescent need for justice and fairness - that thing that makes you dig in your heels and say “no. That’s not fair, that’s not right.” 

SO here’s where I’d put the title card: “Bartholomew and Thaddeus Take Down The Government”. How do they do it? No idea! I’m flyin by the seat of my pants here! Do they run for office? Do they publicize the president’s crimes in such a way he gotta go to jail? Do they somehow turn public opinion against him enough to get him out of office? idk!!! And I don’t remember enough about Earthgov’s political situation to put an accurate read on what exactly they might do to disrupt it. 

Either way they don’t kill him, manage to free their mom, and they all go back to the past together. And a new arc would involve the three of them getting settled in the past; Meloni would be a main character now, and hers is a two-pronged fish out of water story where she’s trying to figure out how shit works in the past, with overtones of the struggles of being a single parent. 

And... I’m not going to say any more about that because this is long enough already oof. 

TL;DR I think a coming of age story would be cool for Bart, and having to deal with growing up when he never really had a childhood. Also the comic itself would be aimed at younger audiences, who can probably relate to having a Bad Time in the Teens and wacky hijinks with friends and siblings.

[genderfluidkevinday]

genderfluid kevin day headcanons bc i can do what i want and also i have the perfect url to spread my “please representation” propaganda. 

“how did you know?”

because in the quiet of nights when kevin is supposed to be asleep but he cant, not really, when his heart is still pounding from practice and every breath riko makes him terrified of being caught, he reads what he stole from the public library and it says sometimes people do not fit into the gender they were assigned and

because by sneaking searches on the internet when he can, kevin finds words. dangerous, un-raven-like words for how to love someone and how to be yourself. he finds words that mean you are not alone. 

because he wakes up one day and demands to be the queen of exy, to be seen as what he is. the best. more powerful than the king. (not entirely cisgender?)

because it feels right. 

because in the quiet between exy and family, kevin day has the time and the love to have the quiet understanding that this is who kevin day is. 

it’s kinda a shitty realization process to go through- kevin starts questioning in the ravens, then immediately goes “No TM !” and internalizes all those feelings 

kevin internalizes All the feelings, always ! compartmentalizing!

bisexuality? put it in a box!

gender identity? put it in a box!

feeling crushing inferiority? put it in a box!

mom died tragically? put it in a box!

ur dad isnt here? put it-

jesus fuck these headcanons were supposed to be happy and it got SO derailed 2 points in

anyways 

post canon, kevin starts to become more comfortable w every aspect of himself, and finally takes the time to have a gender crisis

and then, immediately, decides it was all ridiculous and he was actually a cisgender all along !

he does the dumb thing i did. which is spend about a month going “lmao i’m cis but i wish i wasn’t, i don’t need a gender!” while badly ignoring his gender crisis

it’s renee who finally helps kevin out a little

kevin, dumbass: pfft, gender is stupid, but i’m cis so whatever! renee, nb lesbian icon: are you sure? kevin, having a crisis:

renee actually sends kevin a bunch of links to pages that have lots of words, and “what gender are you” quizes, and dumb memes about being trans/nonbinary and it shouldn’t help as much as it does. 

renee is the first person kevin quietly texts at like, 2 am, and goes, “uh, can you use they, i think?”

her response is, obviously, “of course!”

so they’re like, pretty sure they’re not cis, but they bounce around labels for about a week before they end up settling on genderfluid. 

sometimes kevin day is a boy, with loud opinions and soft hands. sometimes kevin day is a girl, with messy hair and a bright smile. sometimes kevin day is neither, with clumsy limbs and determined eyes

(however- kevin day can always outclass any striker on a court.) 

it just feels right, in a way nothing else did. 

theyre like,,, super nervous about coming out, like, they can’t even come up with the courage to tell their dad they’re bi, how the fuck are they gonna end up telling anyone else? solution! don’t.

except kevin is becoming more comfortable with every aspect of themself, and being casually bisexual around the foxes (nicky makes one too many jokes about kevin’s “”hetero guy crush”” on jeremy and they end up snapping “bitch i’m bi there’s nothing hetero about it.” and nicky is immediately like !!!!!!!!!!!!!) (but thats another post)

so kevin, with the growing comfort that yes, you can be non-heterosexual and non-cisgender and still be fucking amazing at exy, they start to come out

it’s a slow process because when they tried to do it all at once, they got tongue tied and just walked away without saying anything. so they end up doing it individually. 

allison first (because renee can be there and give support AND bc allison is also A Trans), and kevin whispers, “so, I’m genderfluid.”

allison, casually: what are your pronouns? kevin: she/her. i’m a girl today. allison, with all the softness of someone who has been there: do you want me to do your makeup? kevin, with all the softness of someone who’s new to this: maybe one day.

after allison is andrew+neil, because they spend so much time together at night practice it’s inevitable it comes up

and by that i mean kevin screams halfway through night practice “THIS IS GENDERFLUIDPHOBIA” because andrew keeps blocking her shots. 

andrew flips her off.

neil asks if thats an actual term.

kevin says to fuck off and keep practicing.

next is wymack. 

oh boy. 

so kevin isn’t even sure how to be a good son- she has no idea how to go about being a good daughter. she has no clue how to be a good child. 

she doesn’t know if wymack even wants that.

but she goes to him after practice and he snaps, “what is it?” in a voice thats maybe a little less gruff than usual

and she says, “i’m genderfluid.”

he stares at her for a while.

she continues, “i’m a girl today, actually, and i just thought you should know.”

wymack asks, “you’ll tell me when it changes, right?”

kevin nods and leaves. 

its a start.

telling jean feels like a really big deal, but in hindsight its about fifteen minutes of bad puns that follow an awkwardly worded coming out. 

kevin: so like... guys right jean: yes? kevin: what if... i wasn’t one jean: are you trying to come out to me? kevin: is it working?

the rest of the monsters follows after that- aaron obviously doesnt understand, but he doesnt say anything rude. (he looks into it later). nicky, immediately, takes a supportive role.

nicky: I’M GONNA STAPLE A GENDERFLUID FLAG TO MY FACE THATS HOW MUCH I SUPPORT YOU kevin, softly: please don’t how would you play exy.

matt and dan get a less official coming out, because kevin isn’t sure how to be friends with them at all. but they manage a “so, i’m not a guy, actually, i’m genderfluid, and right now i don’t have a gender.”

dan gives them a set of pronoun bracelets for their birthday and matt gives them a book about the history of the nonbinary community and yeah, maybe this is how to be friends.

the baby foxes don’t get to find out. kevin doesn’t trust them as much, and isn’t ready to be... out out. 

kevin has absolutely no desire to change their name, at all.

kevin: why would i change my name i’m an ICON.

WAIT i lied,,, they change their middle name to kayleigh. 

the first time kevin gets invited to a girls night, she cries

its a surprise, which is hard to plan- girls nights are always on tuesdays, so they have to wait for a tuesday where kevin is free and feels like a girl

renee casually mentions that they have a history book that kevin might like, so she should come pick it up

and then in the dorm, dan and allison are setting up a movie and popcorn and renee is getting her nails painted. dan waves kevin over and tells her to pick a movie, allison tells her to pick out a nail polish, and renee actually does have a history book for her.

kevin finally accepts a make over from allison. 

she cries like five times that night and tries to brush it off as nothing but... kevin can finally exist in a space, and feel welcome, and also feel... wanted.

it’s a good feeling

kevin, wearing a crop top with the genderfluid flag on it, painting renee’s nails as they watch the trojans game: lmao can you imagine thinking i was cis? what was i thinking? i was so dumb lol.  renee, sweetly: no it was a perfectly normal reaction to being raised in a cisnormative society, and i’m very proud of you for figuring out that it wasn’t right for you kevin: dammit renee why do you have to be so kind and supportive just let me make jokes about my moron-ness in PEACE 

kevin day is the fucking QUEEN of exy !!!!!!! she’s better than you and you know it. 

each and every day kevin day hears misogonistic comments towards female exy players and each and every day kevin day wants to scream B I T C H in their face

he wanted to do this even before he figured out he was genderfluid bc kevin day drank respect women juice before realizing he was also drinking sometimes i am women juice

kevin actually 100% hates dresses a lot bc they can never find any that are a good texture and its Sensory Hell, and also you cant play exy in them?? what the fuck??? 

they end up liking crop tops and short shorts, and a few kinds of makeup, but skirts and dresses are dumb and itchy actually 

kevin goes on an impassioned rant about this at LEAST once a month

you know that really good feeling when you wake up one day and you realize you’re happier knowing who you are and maybe it’s rough and maybe it’s not perfect but you get to know who you are and your friends respect and love you for who you are and you start to realize you love knowing you too????????

yeah.

kevin day is genderfluid and this is my hill to die on thank you and good night

[the-transfeminine-mystique]

I don't mean this question rudely so I've been hesitating to ask but your bathhouse post made me wonder - how do you reconcile the idea of casual sex with the fact that most Christians seem to have a consensus that casual sex is Bad, since you're a theologian and all? (honestly there's a lot of cute girls on Tinder but I want to figure whether it's on the theological up-and-up)

let me get this straight, anon….. if i answer this well enough, you’ll be able to lose ur virginity? holy shit this is more pressure than any of my final papers

Ok, this is going to be a longer post, so…. yeah

I guess first of all I’d trouble the notion that consensus *necessarily* means that a particular belief is definitive. Since at least the advent of Constantinian Christianity with the Edict of Milan, where the Church became explicitly tied to empire, most Christians have had many a consensus that, when it comes down to it, is diametrically opposed to Christ’s teachings. Consensus doesn’t automatically mean that something *is* or *should be.* It merely means that it has become a hegemonic or near-hegemonic view. And all hegemonic views, particularly when they concern life-and-death, eternally-significant beliefs, need to be constantly challenged and examined lest we find our belief exploited for violent human ends.

Having gotten that out of the way, the way that I would approach the question you’re asking is to ask just who/what we are theologically, because that is very significant in determining ways to have right relations. The model I subscribe to is that we are humans, made to be in fellowship with God and to receive at Dei’s hands the gifts which it is Dei’s nature to give. Through the incarnation, we, although possessing no way in ourselves to relate truly nonviolently to each other (following Derrida, even the assigning of a proper name or an identity category is a violence insofar as it reduces the radically unique individual into merely a signifier that can in no way properly describe the individual), are called into being as persons in the way that the persons of the Trinity are persons, a radically transcendent system of difference that is fundamentally nonviolent, though as such remaining outside our understanding. To understand who we are as persons, then, is a kind of negative theology, it is identifying all those things that our personhood is not.

Our personhood is not violent, however incapable we are of fully living into it and living as persons and not as humans enmeshed in a human epistemology. Nothing violent, then, can be said to be proper to our personhood, and forsaking violence can never be in violation of that personhood.

Our personhood does not consist of the identity categories that structure our human existence. Galatians 3:28 speaks of the impermanence of class, race, and gender/sex. Critical reflection, whether Marxist theory, critical race theory, or feminist/gender/queer theory, clue us in on why. Because each of those identities are historically contingent, and are premised upon violence. The emergence of race as we know it was explicitly tied to the justification of slavery. Gender/sex as we know it exists solely to justify the domination of women. The existence of the rich is premised upon the violation of the poor.

In a similar vein, Jesus himself said that marriage is not an eschatological category in Matthew 22:30. Marriage is explicitly tied to the system of gender/sex, and facilitates the domination of women. It is a human social contract, and, as such, a violent relation. Even if we view God as instituting marriage in Genesis, we are confronted with the realization that the relation that God ordained between Adam and Eve bears only the most abstract of resemblances to what marriage has come to be. The restrictions placed on who can marry, the coercion of the state in a thousand different ways, the preclusion of disabled people from the institution, the tying of marriage to the tax code, these all should tell us that what we know as “marriage” is a wholly human construct. A violent institution.

Our moral responsibility is to seek to live our human lives in the best approximation of personhood as we can. We are embroiled in violences, but we must attempt to reject it wherever it appears. This understanding of responsibility puts less weight on sexual chastity than most Christians, but puts a much greater weight on understanding the way that our relations facilitate or attempt to reject violence. The flip-side of the conservative position on sex outside of marriage, remember, is that all sex inside of marriage is good. The institution becomes the measure of morality, and abuse proliferates. That is not the kind of relation we are called to.

It doesn’t matter what your standing is with regard to a particular state-issued license. What matters is that the relations you foster are premised upon an acknowledgement of the possibility of violence, and an explicit turning away from it. By all means, be as promiscuous as you want, but ground that promiscuity in a respect and full embrace of the other person, remembering whose image you both are.

[mortaems-blog]

*     taps     mic     *     so,     uh,     is     this     thing     on     ?     hello     !     my     name’s     stevie,     i’m     twenty     (     she/they     pns,     please     )     and     i’m     writing     out     of     aest     !     [     bill     hader     vc     ]     i     like     true     crime     and     pretending     like     i     don’t     have     a     million     things     to     do     outside     of     writing     !     anyways     !     under     the     cut     you’ll     find     information     about     francesca     ramorini,     ezra     kennedy     and     percy     frazer     !     u     know     the     drill,     like     this     &     i’ll     pop     into     your     ims     either     here     or     on     disc.ord     to     plot     !

francesca  magdalene  ramorini.  vampire.  old.

full  name:  francesca  magdalene  ramorini. physical  age:  thirty-one. real  age:  six  hundred  and  seventy  seven. birthplace:  milan,  italy. birthdate:  january  sixth,  1342. nationality:  italian. species:  vampire. gender  identity:  cis  female,  she/her  pronouns. sexuality:  bisexual.

when  i  say  she’s  old,  i  mean  old.  francesca  and  her  brother,  domenico,  are  from  13th  century  milan,  where  their  family  were  originally  some  of  the  most  prolific  hunters  in  italy.  the  ramorinis  had  been  vampire  hunters  for  years  previous,  but  it  was  their  parents  who  had  really  cemented  the  reputation  as  some  of  the  best.  the  ramorinis  were  a  big  name  in  milan  anyway,  just  because  of  how  ridiculously  wealthy  they  were.  these  guys  are  fucking  loaded.  they  were  very  much  the  apex  predator  in  the  milani  aristocracy  at  the  time.  naturally,  the  whole  ‘we’re  a  bunch  of  vampire  hunters’  thing  is  very  hidden,  concealed  under  the  family’s  reputation  as  the  owners  of  what  feels  like  an  impossibly  large  international  bank  that  funded  chunks  of  the  holy  roman  empire.  with  all  that  in  mind,  francesca  grows  up  with  absolutely  nothing  but  opulence,  and  their  parents  really  allow  her  to  grow  into  her  own  woman  ---  strong,  determined,  with  a  mind  for  both  family  trades.  there  was  never  any  chance  of  her  just  sitting  round  and  being  complacent  in  the  predetermination  of  her  life  ;  she’s  always  been  headstrong,  brave,  intelligent  and  opinionated,  too  loud  for  her  own  good,  a  face  to  turn  heads.  

they  have  a  younger  brother,  too,  fredo.  (  the  name  is  very  significant.  )  as  dom  and  francesca  started  to  learn  to  hunt  themselves,  they’d  often  end  up  with  fred  tagging  along,  and  for  the  most  part  that  was  fine.  fred’s  a  bit  of  a  weirdo,  but  having  them  around  wasn’t  so  bad   ---   until  one  particular  hunt.  really,  it’s  no  one’s  fault  (  despite  a  centuries-long  running  joke  that  it  was  fred  that  got  them  there  in  the  first  place  )   ;   it’s  a  case  of  wrong  place,  wrong  time.  anyways,  francesca  and  dom  were  turned  on  that  particular  hunt  and  their  entire  world  just  kinda  spun  out,  tbh.  they  were  so  accustomed  to  seeing  vampires  and  whatnot  as  the  absolute  enemy,  nothing  more  than  a  scourge  to  be  wiped  out   ---  but  now  they  were  part  of  that  scourge.  

francesca  especially  had  a  hard  time  dealing  with  the  transition.  everything  she  knew  was  flipped  on  its  head,  a  life  she  once  looked  forward  to  reveling  in  lost  in  the  blink  of  an  eye,  the  sink  of  a  fang.  the  transition  isn’t  easy,  but  she  shoulders  it  regardless  because  it’s  just  part  of  life  now.  she  gives  up  the  life  she  was  meant  to  have  and  forges  a  new  one  ---  and  she  thinks  she’ll  hate  it,  but  it  turns  out  to  be  oddly  freeing.  she  takes  up  art,  learns  to  paint  and  sculpt  from  some  of  the  greatest  ;  she  learns  more  than  she  ever  could  as  an  aristocrat,  becomes  rather  chameleonic  about  it  all.

so,  anyways  !  she  and  dom  are  in  louisiana  now,  in  this  massive  fucking  mansion  that  they  wrangled  ;  francesca  moonlights  as  any  number  of  different  jobs.  she  teaches  a  late - night  art  class,  runs  an  adult  ballet  class  (  she  danced  with  fonteyn  in  the  40s  )  ---  she’s  become  incredibly  comfortable  in  the  life  she’s  built.  falling  into  it  all  was  easier  than  she  ever  imagined  it  could  be.

anyways,  fun  facts:  

she  dresses  so  goddamn  well.  she  looks  good  literally  all  the  time,  and  she  fuckin  KNOWS  it  /  francesca  honey  stop  wearing  expensive  tailored  suits  everywhere  ur  going  to  make  men  insecure  

won’t  ever  shut  up  about  emily  dickinson  or  georgia  o’keeffe........  #ma’am  ur  crush  is  loud  and  painful

the  hot  aunt  aunt  at  the  dinner  party  who  simultaneously  judges  ur  decisions  and  encourages  them

yet  another  ramorini  casanova  ...  are  we  surprised  yet  (  no  )

ezra  riley  kennedy.  hunter.  twenty - one.

full  name:  ezra  riley  kennedy. physical  age:  twenty-one. birthplace:  hoboken,  new  jersey. birthdate:  july  ninth,  1998. nationality:  american. species:  human. gender  identity:  non-binary,  they/them  pronouns. sexuality:  pansexual.

i  need  it  known  right  fockin  now  that  i  would  literally  die  for  ezra  .  they’re  my  FUCKING  baby  and  i  won’t  shut  up  about  it

ezra  was  born  to  two  former  hunters  who  gave  up  the  minute  they  were  pregnant.  it  wasn’t  a  choice  they  were  particularly  willing  to  make,  and  despite  swearing  that  they’d  stop  after  having  kids  they  never  really  did.  almost  immediately  after  ezra  was  born  their  parents  were  back  out  hunting  again,  leaving  the  baby  with  their  grandparents.  as  such,  ezra’s  raised  entirely  by  their  maternal  grandparents.  they  simultaneously  teach  them  their  family  history  (  an  extensive  hunting  background,  the  expectations  that  sit  heavy  on  their  shoulders.  ezra’s  expected  to  carry  on  the  family  legacy  the  minute  they  turn  eighteen,  to  learn  how  to  hunt  and  kill.  admittedly,  it’s  a  shock  to  the  system.

they’re  not  in  much  contact  with  their  parents.  they  come  home  every  so  often,  greet  their  kid  and  go  straight  to  sleep.  there’s  very  little  real  interaction  /  gets  to  the  point  where  ezra  thinks  of  them  more  as  irritating  roommates  that  come  home  late  and  eat  everything  than  actual  parents.  their  loyalty  is  to  their  grandparents,  without  a  doubt.

ezra’s  keenly  aware  that  they’ve  got  no  choice  in  their  career,  but  they  can’t  help  but  want  some  kind  of  say  in  it.  they  excel  at  stem  subjects  in  school,  more  often  found  in  science  labs  testing  hypotheses  in  their  free  time  than  anywhere  else.  they’re  left  alone  more  often  than  not,  slipping  through  school  without  much  of  a  problem  until  they’re  sixteen  and  their  parents  die  in  the  middle  of  a  hunt.  it’s  a  rude  shock  to  the  system,  having  to  bury  both  parents  at  such  a  young  age  but  they  do  it  with  tremendous  grace  and  class.  shortly  after  the  funeral,  they  drop  out  of  school  to  start  hunting.

they’re  jaded  going  into  it,  definitely.  their  only  real  image  of  hunters  is  the  one  they  were  handed  by  their  parents   ---   of  dark  circles  under  eyes,  chain  smoking,  swallowing  bourbon  like  water,  passing  out,  rinse  and  repeat.  they’re  determined  to  break  that  mold,  to  do  something  different  but  they  won’t  lie,  they  considered  it  at  first.  for  their  first  few  hunts  they  tried  to  imitate  their  parents,  and  it  didn’t  turn  out  well   ---   so,  like  everything  else,  ezra  fits  it  to themself,  and  the  rest  is  history.  they  develop  their  own  style,  and  it  works.

hoboken  is  too  small,  not  enough  for  them  so  they  pack  up  and  move  off  to  louisiana.  (  they’d  found  an  old  journal  of  their  parents’,  with  notes  alluding  to  a  wish  to  move  to  new  orleans  and  despite  not  being  close  they  figured  it  might  be  a  good  idea.  )  they’ve  been  in  nola  for  about  a  year  now,  and  they’re  growing  to  love  it.  they’ve  always  been  a  city  kid,  and  there’s  something  about  nola  just  speaks  to  them.

so,  fun  facts:

super  good  with  technology.  they  fix  shit  in  their  free  time,  &  they  build  computers  n  shit   ?????

smells  like  frangipani  and  jasmine  and  ginger.  they  smell  really  fucking  good  for  some  reason

lots  of  denim  and  leather  and  yellow  in  their  outfits.  they’ve  got  one  particular  leather  jacket  for  hunting,  but  they  kinda  started  a  collection

angelic  in  every  single  way  possible

has  a  black  cat,  named  salem.  salem’s  a  good  cat.

percy  floyd  frazer.  witch.  twenty - four.

full  name:  percy  floyd  frazer. physical  age:  twenty-four. birthplace:  amsterdam,  the  netherlands. birthdate:  february  12th,  1995. nationality:  british. species:  witch. gender  identity:  demi  male,  he/they  pronouns. sexuality:  bisexual.

percy  .......  sighs.  i  love  him  so  fuckin  much

so  !  percy  is  born  to  two  english  witches  while  they’re  on  holiday  in  amsterdam,  a  pregnancy  that  both  parties  had  been  hoping  for  ;  their  household  was  starting  to  feel  awfully  lonely,  and  a  baby  sounded  like  the  perfect  way  to  round  it  all  out.  naturally,  though,  nothing  goes  to  plan  ---  his  arrival  puts  ‘unwarranted  stress’  on  his  dad,  who  cuts  his  losses  and  runs  about  a  month  after  percy’s  birth.  bit  of  a  dick  move,  but  let’s  move  on.  his  mother,  annaliese,  doesn’t  harbour  any  real  resentment  towards  his  dad  for  leaving  ;  she’d  fallen  in  love  with  amsterdam�� on  their  brief  holiday  and  was  planning  on  breaking  up  and  moving  there  anyway.  

so  !  for  his  entire  childhood,  it’s  just  percy  and  his  mom,  and  it’s  the  best  kind  of  childhood  you  could  ask  for.  he  grows  up  watching  all  the  same  movies  as  his  mom,  reading  her  books  and  just  hanging  around  her  24/7.  ngl  he  kinda  had  the  coolest  childhood   ????   his  mom  loved  to  rent  out  her  favourite  bands’  old  tour  videos  and  there’s  many  an  afternoon  where  the  two  of  them  would  sit  there  and  just  listen  to  music  together.  their  relationship  is  very  similar  to  that  of  theo  and  his  mother  from  the  goldfinch,  if  that  gives  anyone  a  frame  of  reference.

he’s  about  thirteen  when  she  finally  sits  him  down,  tells  him  about  the  magic  that  whispers  a  steady  thrum  in  his  veins.  she  tells  him  about  the  uprising,  about  the  way  magic  has  become  outlawed,  how  he   has  to  learn  to  restrain  himself.  it’s  a  lot  for  someone  so  young  to  understand,  but  he  sits  through  it  patiently,  peppering  questions  here  and  there.  he  doesn’t  seem  particularly  enthused  about  his  heritage  (  really,  who  would  )   ---   his  mother  barely  holds  back  the  tremor  in  her  voice  throughout  the  conversation.

the  more  percy  learns  about  the  restriction  of  magic,  the  more  bitter  and  jaded  he  grows  about  it  all.  he  doesn’t  hate  himself,  nor  his  mother,  hates  the  pureblood  monarchy  with  such  a  passion  it’s  almost  terrifying.  he’s  sixteen  when  he  swears  off  magic,  tries  to  quash  it  down  the  best  he  can.  he  point - blank  refuses  to  accept  that  it’s  part  of  him,  and  tries  to  find  a  passion  that  distracts  him  from  it.  that  ends  up  being  music,  and  he  takes  to  it  like  a  fish  takes  to  water.  the  minute  he  picks  up  a  guitar,  it’s  like  his  world  makes  sense.

they’ve  been  living  in  amsterdam  this  entire  time,  wasting  afternoons  in  art  galleries  and  bakeries.  percy’s  eighteen  when  he  decides  that  it’s  time  to  spread  his  wings  and  move  away  ---  his  decision  is  hardly  precise,  he  throws  a  dart  at  a  map  and  hopes  for  the  best.  it  lands  on  new  orleans,  louisiana,  and  he  just  kinda  goes  with  it.  he  doesn’t  have  much  to  pack  up:  a  single  suitcase  full  of  clothes,  another  filled  with  books  and  dvds,  and  his  guitars,  that’s  it.  both  him  and  his  mom  cry  at  the  airport,  but  it’s  happy  crying.  

so,  anyways   !   he’s  been  in  louisiana  for  six  years  now,  and  he  loves  it.  when  he  first  moved  he  worked  any  number  of  casual  jobs,  but  he’s  settled  into  one  as  a  bookseller  in  an  indie  bookshop.  he  writes  film  +  music  reviews  for  a  number  of  online  sites  as  well,  so  he’s  got  himself  a  steady  lil  income.  

some  fun  facts:

dresses  like  an  utter  e-boy  and  i  won’t  apologise  for  it  

looks  n  acts  like  an  arrogant  prick  sometimes  but  truly....... sweet,  kind,  would  do  anything  for  the  people  he  loves  (  even  if  that  number  is  small  )

totally  pretentious  about  his  tastes.  don’t  start  him,  for  the  love  of  god

perpetually  got  his  glasses  on,  perpetually  holding  an  oversized  cup  of  tea

has  a  collection  of  tiny  little  tattoos  (  they’re  all  references  to  books / movies / music  he  loves  )

i  ............  love  him  a  lot

[aneverlandboi]

A Belated Birthday

From: Ned [0.01am]

happy birthday dude!!

From: Ned [0.23am]

I can’t believe ur asleep!

From: MJ [2.35am]

Happy birthday, dork. I’ll give you your present tomorrow x

From: MJ [2.35am]

well, today x

From: MJ [2.37am]

I guess you’re asleep. Night xx

From: Ned [8.43am]

hey where r u?

From: Ned [8.49am]

ur going to be late on ur birthday?

From: MJ [8.50am]

Let me guess. Missed the bus? Let me know when you’ll be here x

From: MJ [9.00am]

When you can. Don’t text and swing!

From: Ned [9.00am]

dude, we’re waiting for you??

From: MJ [9.01am]

Also try not to get hit by a car x

Missed Call From: Ned [9.10am]

Missed Call From: MJ [9.11am]

From: MJ [9.20am]

Okay, you’re officially late. Not that Harrington is surprised.

From: MJ [9.20am]

That felt harsh, esp considering its your birthday. Sorry xx

From: MJ [9.22am]

Are you okay?x

From: MJ [9.46am]

If you don’t message one of us soon, we’ll contact May!

From: Ned [9.52am]

are you okay??? has something happened????? pls message me!!

From: MJ [10.34am]

Not that you can’t take care of yourself, but you’re not answering and I’m getting concerned. Gonna get Ned to check w May if ur okay. Don’t blame me if she spills some embarrassing secretxx

Peter scrolled through the stream of messages on his phone, mood souring with every passing second. The nurses at the hospital hadn’t been willing to let him even look at his phone for hours after he’d been brought in, even with it buzzing almost incessantly. Luckily, with a police escort and a couple of agents from SHIELD, he’d skipped the queue, and after a few pointed comments, the doctors had managed to patch him up without removing his mask, although Peter guessed they now knew he was white and skinny, and that they could probably figure out his rough age from, like, body proportions and stuff. Although ‘Spider-Man is young white man’ probably wouldn’t be the biggest reveal in the world. That was only, like, one in six million people, or something.

His phone buzzed again. A news report.

Because you follow ‘Spider-Man’ in the News:

The Daily Bugle: Spider-Man hospitalised after brawl with crime boss Kingpin.

Well, it wasn’t a surprise that the news had gotten out. Plenty of people had seen him get thrown out of a twenty-third-story window, and then there were the kind bystanders who called an ambulance when he’d crashed onto the pavement from about the tenth floor when his webbing snapped. Then there were the medics, and everyone at the hospital who had seen him come in with police and SHIELD escorts, who weren’t exactly subtle, even if his suit had been covered up. It was a miracle it had taken this long for the news to be released!

Incoming Call From: MJ

Peter hit answer and held the phone against his head with his shoulder.

“Peter?!” MJ asked as soon as the call connected, “Are you okay?”

Peter thought for a moment and swallowed. The drugs were already wearing off, but his tongue still felt a bit heavy.

“I’m okay, I suppose,” he answered vaguely, trying not to worry her, “Just had a bit of trouble on patrol.”

“You got thrown out of a window, dude!” Ned’s voice was slightly muffled. It took Peter a moment to realise he was on speakerphone.

“Where are you guys?” he asked nervously. He didn’t want to accidentally mention Spider-Man if they were sat in the middle of the cafeteria.

“We’re bunking off school to come see you,” Ned said lightly, “We’re in the park a block from school waiting for a bus to Manhattan.”

Peter sighed, then realised he was chewing on his lip.

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea, guys,” Peter said uncertainly, “There’s a lot of news cameras outside the door, so you guys wouldn’t be able to get in without being seen, and then everyone would be harassing you guys to see if you know who I am.”

“We could climb in the window,” MJ said suddenly. Peter wasn’t entirely sure if she was joking. “You could lower some webbing, and we could climb up it. Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your webbing.”

Peter laughed at that, then, pulling his mask down over his face, leant to look out the window. He couldn’t see much – he could only lean so far without risking pulling over the heart-monitor he was attached to – but he could definitely see some figures camping outside, cameras aimed at the window. He considered waving to them, or maybe flipping them off, but the part of him that had actually paid attention during the super-hero PR crash course with Miss Potts made him reconsider.

“Unfortunately, I’ve got some creeps aiming cameras at my window, so you’d be spotted anyway.”

He heard MJ sigh in irritation and found himself smiling slightly, in spite of himself. It was good to feel wanted.

“Well, this isn’t exactly the birthday celebration I had planned.”

Peter sat back, making sure he was clear of the window before pulling his mask up and replying.

“You had something planned?” Peter asked, feeling a flash of guilt. If he’d managed to beat Kingpin, or even if he’d just been more cautious and fled when the flash-bangs went off, none of this would have happened.

“No,”MJ said hurriedly. Peter grinned. “Quick, Ned, cancel the marching band!”

Again, Peter found himself laughing, clutching his side to avoid splitting the stitching. He could only thank God for his enhanced regeneration. He’d probably end up getting out of hospital by tomorrow, assuming the doctors didn’t try and cut him up to figure out how he worked. Not that he was paranoid about men in white coats – and women, for that matter, since MJ would kill him if he even internally implied that women couldn’t be doctors, and they were just as scary when they were dissecting you. But again, not that he was paranoid, just… sensibly wary.

“But seriously, guys. I’m already getting better. I’ll probably be out of here first thing tomorrow, if I can get through the crowd of reporters.”

“You could always climb out the window,” MJ pointed out, “Though if you were going to do that, you don’t need to wait to get discharged. You could just sneak out at night and go home.”

Peter’s mind immediately came up with an alternative arrangement – more of a daydream, really – which had him sneaking out, turning up at MJ’s window at night and… well, staying the night was a pretty good euphemism. Before he could get properly distracted by the idea, a knock at the door startled him.

“I’ve got to go,” Peter said hurriedly, already pulling his mask down, “I’ll see you guys tomorrow!”

“Okay, b–” Ned’s goodbye became distant as MJ turned off speakerphone.

“See you tomorrow, dork. Try not to break any more bones.”

Peter grinned.

“I’ll try. Love you.”

He hit the button to end the call, took a breath, then called out to whoever was stood outside. The door opened and Happy walked in alongside the doctor that had been treating Peter.

“Hey, Happy. Doc,” Peter said in greeting, nodding to the two of them.

“How are you feeling, uh, Spider-Man?” Happy asked. Peter shrugged.

“Like I got thrown out of a twenty-third-story window last night.”

“I must say,” the doctor said, looking over Peter’s medical chart with a raised eyebrow, “You’ve recuperated a lot quicker than I’d have expected. Even simply surviving fall like that is impressive, but you’re already healing up quite nicely.”

Peter nodded.

“Yeah, uh, enhanced regeneration,” he said wryly, “I heal up really quickly.”

The doctor raised his other eyebrow, then nodded. Peter supposed that when you were dealing with super-heroes, doctors just got used to hearing things like that.

“So,” Peter said, glancing between the two of them, “gimme the verdict, doc. When do you think I’ll be out of here?”

On the plus side, the doctors did not, in fact, cut Peter up and figure out how he worked. On the downside, he was kept for a lot longer than he’d intended. Peter supposed it was something about the idea that “this person just got thrown out of a twenty-third story window” that made doctors less willing to release said person, even if the person was actually medically fit to be discharged. So it was already 11pm the day after his birthday before Peter was officially discharged, herded past the throng of reporters and down a corridor by SHIELD agents, plunked inside the oh-so-subtle posh black sedans with heavily tinted window that government agents seemed to use, and driven through numerous back-alleys in a convoy of identical cars. SHIELD, and Fury in particular, seemed very determined to prevent any possibility of Peter’s identity being leaked.

Speaking of Fury…

“So, Parker.”

“Mister Fury.”

There was a moment’s silence as Peter tried to decide where to look on Fury’s face. It was a question he still hadn’t properly answered, even after a number of meetings with the director. His working eye? Or did that make a thing out of his missing eye? His nose? Or was that weird? Staring at his lips was definitelyweird. It was one advantage of the mask, that Fury didn’t know Peter was testing out looking at different parts of his face.

“What happened with Kingpin?” Fury asked, looking at Peter with what the boy assumed was his version of disappointment. It didn’t look particularly different to his usual expression.

“His people had a lot more weapons than I’d expected,” Peter admitted, “The flash-bangs took me by surprise.”

Fury frowned.

“And the machine-gun turrets hidden in the ceiling were a nice touch,” Peter added, a little defensively.

“Stark tech?” Fury guessed. Peter shrugged.

“I didn’t pay that much attention to the branding while they were shooting at me, but I’d say so.”

“How the hell did Kingpin get his hands on Stark tech?”

Peter was about to answer when he realised it was probably a rhetorical question.

“I’ll ask him next time I – ”

“No,” Fury said firmly, “Keep out of Kingpin’s way.”

Peter blinked in surprise.

“We’ll put eyes on him and wait until he gets more tech. Then we can find out where he gets it from…”

“And cut off a source of heavy weaponry,” Peter finished, nodding. “Smart plan.”

“I know,” Fury said flatly, “That’s why I came up with it.”

Peter shut his mouth.

“And if by some miracle it’s not Beck’s people, the source might be able to get into contact with them.”

Peter nodded, biting his tongue from saying something else obvious.

The car stopped suddenly.

“This is your stop.”

Peter leant over to look out the window.

“This is Brooklyn,” Peter corrected, “I’m over in Queens.”

He turned back to see Fury looking at him, expression blank.

“Get out the car, Parker.”

Peter got out the car.

It wasn’t that Peter had been planning on going to MJ’s house that evening, but since Fury had dropped him off in Brooklyn, and her house was pretty much on the way to his if you were heading into Queens from that direction, it kind of ended up with Peter perched on a lamppost opposite her house anyway. He could pop in, say hi, then head back and get a stern talking-to from May about the importance of not being thrown out of windows. Or, Peter realised with a flash of inspiration, he could put off the lecture for a little longer and stay the night at MJ’s… Share a bed with his girlfriend, or get shouted at by his aunt. It was a really tough decision to make. Honestly, he was torn.

The light in MJ’s room flickered on, and Peter saw her silhouette appear at the window. Then the window slid open. The decision had really been made for him, in that case, because it would just be ungentlemanly to leave a lady at her window in the cold night.

Sure, Peter had been perched outside her window for a good half an hour waiting for just that excuse, and then – because his legs were aching and he was quickly getting bored of waiting – he’d texted her to get her to come to the window, but that was all really neither here nor there, and he could just not mention that bit to May when he saw her in the morning. Or he could just head straight to school and put the lecture off for another day! That was much better.