#fun fact i made this last night and he told me today he's been reading emma

[angeloncewas]

If you're willing, with you I'd like to try

[ never love an anchor, the crane wives // love from a distance, richard siken // simply together, alina malykhina // strawberry wine, noah kahan // the world is a sphere of ice and our hands are made of fire, ritika jyala // emma, jane austen // never alone, sharon cummings // poetry, mine ]

[iloveyoumorethansoup]

Bro I am straight up never never letting my mother tell me any sort of medical information ever again

[foreverdolly]

this is a self pitying post and i’ll probably delete it later- but when i’m sad i tend to write it out. i’ve used this blog like a diary of sorts for the last two and a half years. i’ve developed a relationship with a lot of you on here and i appreciate all the love i’ve received so far on my last post. my friends that i have in real life, no matter how long i’ve known them, don’t know too much about my upbringing or my parents. i hate the idea of trauma dumping- it’s uncomfortable for other people: so don’t read this if you don’t want to. i wouldn’t blame you.

my dad died from cirrhosis due to alcoholism. he died miserable and alone. he had no friends. his family was sick of him. i tried to call him as often as i could but sometimes he could be mean if he was drunk. i knew not to call him after 11:00 in the afternoon because he would start to drink. he lived in his youngest brother’s basement and almost never came upstairs because he was embarrassed. i haven’t seen him in three years because he lives fourteen hours from me, but i tried my hardest to call him every week and keep him involved in my life. he never saw any of my homes, never met any of my friends, and never even saw me drive a car (i’ve been licensed since i was eighteen). i cried to him almost every week, begging him to get sober.

he never recovered from my parent’s divorce, and for that i feel so sorry. he called my mother his soulmate and always spoke in past tense- talking about when me and my brother were little. he would tear up when talking about the first time he ever saw me in the hospital after my mother gave birth, and he was vocal about the fact that i was his favorite. we shared a lot of the the same interests and always had fun when talking.

when my mom made a suicide attempt two years ago he was there for me almost everyday, calling me despite the demons he was battling with himself.

the last time i spoke to him was thursday- a week from the day he died. he told me that he almost called a treatment facility but he got tired and took a nap instead. his doctors appointment was today at one and he was going to ask to be admitted and then go to a rehab facility. i told him i’d send him money while he was in there- he hasn’t been able to hold a job since i was still in high school.

my dad was a chef. a damn good cook- classically trained in french cooking. he had the loudest laugh i’ve ever heard, so much so that it used to make me cry when i was a baby. we used to wear matching costumes and he’d sign me out from school on halloween and call me out the day after. he took me to my first concert, but he couldn’t afford both the gas and the tickets (so i paid for the gas with my pocket change at the age of thirteen). he wore adidas strictly- shell toe was his favorite.

when i was little my dad was on night duty while my mom was away: tucking us in, reading us books. he refused to read to me and walked out the door but not before saying “bed bugs and stuff”. i thought it was so funny. it became our saying. every night we spent with each other we said “bed bugs and stuff”. so that was my last send off to him. i hope he’s finally resting well and isn’t depressed, ashamed or lonely anymore where he is.

he died in his sleep. they found a solo cup filled with vodka next to his bed and i can’t stop thinking about the fact that he was going to get help today. he was yellow due to jaundice. what a cruel world.

[buckyarchives]

Metal Arms and Short Skirts | Bucky Barnes. [1]

summary: waltzing in as the new head of the Avenger's medical division, impressing everyone, and... scaring Bucky with your incredibly short skirts. while Bucky's having a hard time looking at his arm as anything other than a deadly weapon, and you're more than happy to help him.

word count: 5.6k author note: this started as a small, very self indulgent short story that i had no plans of finishing nor posting but here i am. this is also a sort of mini story while write a much longer/ complex story. i hope to have this finished by the end of jan. my inbox is open for prompts to write as small drabbles! enjoy!

outfit reference (because it kinda important, but you can change it if you'd like; this is just for visuals) outfit one and outfit two

story playlist here

READ ON AO3 | masterlist

A soft knock at the door echoed and Bucky’s eyes sprung open, making himself aware of his surroundings as he began rubbing the drowsiness from his eyes with his flesh hand. His gaze pans to the small clock, ‘6:00 am’, it read. 

“Buck? You up?” Bucky’s head snapped toward the familiar voice. He called out a quick, muffled response while slipping on some pants. Bucky knotted his eyebrows as he crept towards the door, drowsiness still lingering. A small scowl decorated Bucky’s face, the knock catching him off-guard. Today was a scheduled free for Bucky.

Bucky opened the door to be met with Steve's face, “what is it?” Bucky asked.

“I told you last night, we gotta get to the lab and fix your arm.” Steve replied, eyes glancing at the bent and crushed panels on his forearm. Sparring was fun until Steve throws his shield a little too fast and Bucky is just a little too late to catch or dodge. “And this is the only time today that Tony is free to fix it, so put a shirt on, and let's go.”

Bucky grumbled under his breath at the orders, he wasn't one to sleep in or mess around with his strict schedule but it had been a rough week. A mission went wrong, and a trip to the med wing. Bucky wanted to be just a little self-indulgent and maybe have a late start by choice. He turned and grabbed a black, sleeveless shirt from his closet. Sleeveless made the process a lot easier and he prayed to any god that Tony wasn't going to be a pain in the ass this morning. 

“Ready?” Steve spoke up as Bucky emerged from his room, a quick pat on the shoulder as he nodded in response. 

The two boys walked side by side towards the med wing, this was the 3rd visit to the lab this week, and it was only Thursday. Bucky decided then and there that were a couple of too many times for his liking. He hoped this went by fast. On the way they both ran into a certain black widow, Steve nearly tripped over Natasha as she walked out of the training room. 

“Hey boys, where you headed too?” she spoke as she began to walk with them down the hall, a bead of sweat dripping from her forehead. 

“Last night's match got a little too fast and I accidentally jammed the shield in Buck's arm, headed to Tony to get it fixed real quick,” Steve spoke, Natasha eyed the smashed vibranium.

Natasha's eyebrows furrowed slightly, “Tony’s in DC right now?”

“Huh?”

“Flew out last night, had some emergency meeting. Said it was no big deal.”

Bucky scoffed under his breath. “Well I'm sure someone is there to fill in or Tony would have sent me a message,” Steve said, hopeful as always.

Bucky wasn't sure if he was happier or more annoyed at the fact Tony wouldn't be working on his arm. Pro; it's not tony. Con; it's a stranger– unless Bruce pulls a medical engineering Ph.D. out of his ass, which in full honestly would not surprise anyone too much. 

An elevator ride and too many hallways later, the trio walked toward the lab, no one looked to be inside from the outside, and Bucky peered through the windows. He thought how bad it would be to turn around and go back to bed now, but Steve made everyone walk in– ‘just to check.

It was quiet for a moment, besides the subtle sound of whirring machines. Soon the large lab door slides open, “I'm so sorry I'm late! I'm filling in for Tony, he had a meeting.”

you walked through the door with a large iPad and a couple of books in hand, you set them down on a bench with a loud thud. Natasha said your name surprised, calling your attention to her.

“I didn’t know you were working at the compound, did Tony just transfer you?” she spoke, Bucky and Steve didn’t recognize you but Natasha seemed to be familiar.

You smiled brightly at Natasha, “yes. Tony wants me here permanently instead of California to give Helen a break from traveling here from Korea every time someone gets a bullet wound; which seemed to happen too often. ” you spoke confidently, “I think Tony just wants me closer to him.”

Natasha chuckled softly and rolled her eyes, “oh, I'm sure. I think you are the only one besides Pepper that can make him slow down.”

“Tony? Slow down?” Steve perked up, joking along.

“Yeah because I'm the only one he trusts with his oh-so-precious work,” you spoke sarcastically before turning towards Steve and Bucky, holding your hand out to greet the two super-soldiers. Introducing yourself, Steve spoke your name back to you, and you smiled.

“It's nice to meet you, and don't worry about being late– we just got here.” Steve shook your hand firmly before you turned to Bucky.

You brought your hand up to shake his hand while your eyes widened and filled with curiosity once you saw his left arm, you attempted to hide it, but Bucky noticed it quickly. He shook your hand. “It's nice to finally meet you and work on– I mean with you Mr. Barnes” you stumbled over your words.

“Call me Bucky, please.” Bucky replied, his hand falling back to his side. 

Bucky wore a confused look after he noticed your attire, questioning if you truly were the engineer slash doctor to work on his arm in Tony Starks place. Your hair was done up, you had a tiny, baby-blue shirt on, made out of bunched-up tulle fabric, it was off the shoulder with the sheer tulle fabric puffing up on your sleeves. 

Your skirt was matching and incredibly short and tight, despite the shortness, a small slit was on up your thigh. Bucky’s eyes fell all the way down to the floor, white boots that wrapped tightly around your calves and stopped around your knee. Not missing the huge, chunky heel that definitely gave you a few inches.

Muffled small talk between you and Natasha started as Bucky took a seat next to Steve, you moved confidently around the lab as if you owned it, pulling the specific tools and materials to start working. Bucky watch you curiously and thought despite your utter confidence and bliss, you looked out of place in the lab.

Your outfit felt so out of place; colorful, fun, and playful against the lab scenery. Bucky imagined seeing you on the new york city streets, walking around with a young and trendy outfit, a model-like strut like you owned the city. The usual sight of scientists here had a boring, toned-down outfit, usually under a lab coat. You sported none of that.

“In full transparency Bucky, since you joined the team I've been asking Tony for a while to work with you, I have many ideas for your arm.” He snapped out of his trance once you addressed him, head turned towards Bucky as you ran your hands under the sink. “I hope you're comfortable with that.”

Bucky just shrugged in response, you laughed lightly at his response. “Well then, can you sit over here for me?” you pointed to a lowered workbench in the center of the room, and Bucky plopped down on it next to your books. Natasha took his place next to Steve across from bucky

Natasha spoke up, “Stark get you your own lab yet? I know how you are about your space.”

Your warm laughter filled Bucky’s ears again, he found himself enjoying the sound ringing in his head. “Tony said as long as I get along with everyone and stop blowing things up I could stay– though I think he has no room to speak.” you joked.

“I have no doubts though, he seemed pretty adamant about making me the head of the lab and medical wing here?”

“Impressing everyone as always I see,” Natasha spoke warmly, you scrunched your face up slightly, smiling shyly at the compliment. 

You caught Bucky off guard for a moment once you asked for permission to grab his lower forearm, already one point better than Tony as he usually would just grab it harshly and get to work. “I try my best.”

“It seems you’ve been working with Tony for while, how come I've never seen you around?” Steve asked, he leaned forward with his elbows propped against his knees. Curious eyes placed on you, Bucky knew that look.

A concentrated gaze took over your face, and your tongue stuck out a little on the side as you worked slowly to get the crushed plates out of Bucky’s arm. Bucky took note of your almost perfect nails, they were long and glossy with a baby blue color and gems. Matching your outfit. 

“Well, Tony definitely put me to work so I haven't had much time to catch up with the avengers. I know Natasha when she was “Tony's assistant.’” you snort, throwing your hands up around the assistant. Natasha smirked.

Steve was impressed– to say the least, humming in response. “Tony has taken a liking to me and always finds jobs for me so I’m constantly traveling and working. I've been pretty busy the past few years so it would make sense to have missed you.”

“Oh, and you have like a million Ph.D.’s” Natasha added.

“Only five.”

Natasha throws her hands up dramatically, blowing raspberries in a mocking manner. “only.”

“A very impressive resume.” Steve teased, Bucky couldn’t help but be impressed as well, especially with being so young. He was also impressed at the delicacy of which you worked, your hands were so steady and Bucky could barely notice you working. More points ahead of Stark.

“All that and I don't think I’ve ever seen you in a bad outfit.” Natasha teased, her eyes traveling up your outfit. “Or hair.”

A shy smile grew on your face, “as long as it doesn’t affect my work, the short skirts stay on.” you winked playfully towards Natasha as she rolled her eyes at the gesture. 

“I’m just glad you finally are settling down in one lab, I missed seeing you around.” Natasha smiled fondly at you. “Found a place to stay yet?”

“Yes! I found a nice apartment close by, Tony wanted to give me a room here but I declined,” you said. Natasha put on an overexaggerated frown.

All the crushed panels were gone and the hardware inside was almost put back in place. Natasha and Steve were both in their own bubble, chatting away about some old mission. Bucky sat staring at you and your hands as you worked. His eyes shamefully traveled towards your thighs, your skirt was traveling up and a little bit and more of the skin on your thighs could be seen.

His head snapped away and towards the two avengers when Natasha's phone went off. apparently, Agent Hill needed the two so after a quick goodbye from Steve and a teased, exaggerated wink from Natasha, the two were gone and Bucky was left alone with you. Bucky tried to keep his eyes averted from your thighs or exposed stomach from your cropped top, but the growing redness on his face said otherwise.

“I really do hope to work with you in the future, make some better use of this arm, yeah?” you spoke up, beginning to replace the old panels with new ones, putting them together like puzzle pieces. 

“My arm’s perfectly fine.” Bucky mumbled.

You nodded slowly, “yes, it is. But, it can be improved. I can add some new tech, you know? Make it stronger, more flexible, add some cybernetic defenses or maybe some built-in sensory rays, and build something in like Natasha bracelets, that deliver some powerful electric discharge.”

Bucky listens to you ramble on about his cyborg arm, your face lit up as you talked about all the possibilities. Your hands are still steady at work on the vibranium. “Is all that really necessary?”

“I think it is, considering fighting is your job. But, if you don't think so, I won’t anything, it’s just an idea.” your eyes are still laser-focused on his arm, not looking at you. Bucky’s eyes glanced back down to your thigh. “And extra tech would make your arm so much cooler.”

Bucky scoffed, “this thing is not cool.”

Your eyes finally left his arm and you looked up at Bucky through your lashes, “I think it’s pretty cool” you smiled slightly at him before going back at his arm.

Cool? he doesn't think anyone's ever called his arm cool. Bucky's eyes left you and he looked forward, defocusing and staring off into space. “Anything you want to be changed or added?”

A few snarky responses came to mind but they fell short on Bucky’s tongue. Bucky wasn’t going to respond and let the silence answer for him, but his eyes flashed toward the blood-red color on his shoulders. 

“Maybe get rid of the star.” Bucky sighed, he said it like it was a sacred confession. Shame laced in his tone. Like no matter how hard he tried to redeem himself, or erase his mind of Hydra– the star painted on his shoulder would never let him rid of it all. Like a branding.

You smiled fondly at him from across the lab, with no disgust or fear. An unusual sight recently with every other agent recoiling from his presence by just living. “Yeah, I can do that. Do you like black? I can do black, oh! Or gold, that'd be cool.”

Bucky could only watch in awe as you contiuned to mumble random colors under your breath, fascinated by the fact you could be anything other than afraid of the machine of an arm. Your wheeled chair scooted closer and Bucky could feel like puffy tule fabric against his leg, his eyes averted sideway, towards your body again. Your skirt was making him nervous, how did you wear outfits like this to work every day? 

You had started to notice Bucky’s eyes ghosting over your outfit mid-conversation with Steve, brushing it off then so you wouldn't embarrass the man in front of his peers. But it was starting to bother you now, did your outfit look bad? Was something out of place? 

“Something wrong with my outfit, Mr. Barnes?” 

“Bucky.” he corrected, his eye darted toward you, a red flush growing on his face now that you noticed his lingering eyes. He was a fool for thinking you wouldn't notice. “Your skirt scares me.”

Your hands stopped working, being taken aback by Bucky’s response. You look up at him confused, a sort of dumbfounded look on your face. “I’m sorry?”

“I mean this with no disrespect, but it's just very short…” his sentence trails up, leaving it at that in hopes of not offending you or writing himself off as a creep. His face was flushed with red so he wasn’t sure how convincing it was, “not that I was- uh, looking at you like that”

‘Well,” your eyes fell back on the metal panel, screw in hand. “I might call you a gentleman for caring about my decently.” you teased, Bucky let out a small sigh knowing you didn’t take his concerns the wrong way.

“But don't worry, sergeant. I’m wearing safety shorts under,” you smirked, getting up from your  seat and swiftly pulling your skirt down. “All done! Do your little arm thing.’

Bucky was caught off guard. Eyebrows furrowed in your direction, “how do you know about that?”

“Like I haven't mentioned enough, I’m very familiar with your work. I've seen videos of you fighting, you do that thing where you like spin in to stretch it out.” you laughed, backing up and attempting a half-assed version of imitating him and spinning your arm in a small circle. Bucky stifled back an amused laugh at the sight, pushing back the thought of thinking you looked quite cute doing it. 

Bucky shook his head, cocking it slightly to the right. And did the arm thing. Watching your face as he did it. Weirdly enough, you smiled with amusement at the sight. ‘“Yeah, that thing!” 

“You are very interesting, has anyone told you that?”

“Yes and I’m choosing to take it as a compliment. Now I have to clean up here and get some other things done, you're free to go Mr. Barnes.” you put away the tools and discharged the old metal plates to be melted down for other uses later. 

“Bucky.” he repeated. 

Turning to him with books and iPad in your arms. “Yes, sorry. Bucky.” you smiled at him and walked past him towards the doorway, you practically strutted out of the lab. Calling back at him before leaving. 

“It was wonderful meeting you!” and you were gone with no room to respond. 

Bucky stood slightly dumbfounded and a little… impressed? In the middle of the lab before seeing the text from steve to meet him in the training room, a groan escaped his mouth hoping he could have one off day. 

What made everything worse is that he had to endure a few too many direct hits from Steve and Sam during their sparing session. Bucky'smind had been somewhere else for the past few hours, puzzled since usually a good training sesh would help him tap out of everything. But his mind seemed plagued with you.

 The way you spoke about his arm like it was the most amazing thing ever like it hadn’t been the cause of so many deaths. Your complete and utter confidence in your every move and sound. Your outfit, your skirt, and the way it kept riding up your thighs. 

Bucky needed a nap.

******

The commons room was close to silent, weirdly silent. it was midday and Bucky sat on a chair, close to a window with his head down into a book. Sam sat close to Steve at the bar, with small and soft chatter. Wanda and Clint were lazily sprawled across the couch, some movie or sitcom playing silently, yet still creating the most noise in the room. The occasional hearty laugh comes from Steve or Sam as they converse competing with the television. 

A few chapters later of Bucky’s book the soft sound of a familiar heels clicking entered the quiet common room. His eyes attempted to stay on the pages but curiosity got the best of him and Bucky raised his head slowly to look at you, you were standing close right next to Sam and Steve talking about something. Steve had that big goofy smile on his face and Sam was shaking your hand, Bucky assumed this was the first time Sam has met you. 

Your outfit was more mellow than his last interaction with you. A white high-neck tank top hugged your body and another very short black denim skirt that had pleads in it. Over all of that was crocheted black sweater, it hug low and off your shoulder. It looked so thin and the loops so big, bucky pondered on why you were even wearing it. Sam laughed loudly and Bucky wondered what was so funny.

A gasp came from Wanda and her eyes widened in your direction. “Oh my god! Your boots are so adorable!” everyone's head turned to the redhead as she got up from the couch frantically to get a closer look at your knee-high, skin-tight boots. “Are those the steve madden boots? I've heard they're a pain to get on?”

You laughed and Bucky got whiplash, he forgot how nice it sounded. Rolling onto your heels as you looked down at your boots, looking back up at Wanda with a soft smile. “Yeah, they are” Clint's head was now perked up and everyone in the room now had their eyes on you. You didn’t falter under their gazes. “And yes, squeezing my claves into these should count as a physical exercise.”

“I've been trying to find some forever, they've been sold out everywhere,” Wanda said. “They look amazing on you!”

A large smile grew on your face and Bucky swears he saw a sliver of shiny metal shine above your top set of teeth, as it’s said curiosity kills the cat and he was already up from his chair to investigate. Quiet footsteps brought him close beside Steve. 

“What’s up, cyborg.” Sam greeted him and Bucky shrugged back a mumbled nothing. Wanda was still gushing about your outfit and Bucky was trying not to look like a total creep staring at your face to see what was in your mouth. 

“Party going on here or something? Without me too, I’m offended.” Clint joined the circle around the bar. Your head perked in his direction. 

A few loud steps toward Clint as your finger swiped at your iPad. “Mr. Barton, I have some new arrow designs for you! I got pretty impressive ones courtesy of Dr. pym.” as you spoke to Clint, you were much closer to Bucky now, maybe he was staring too hard. He watched your lips move, noticing the metal ring sat above your top row teeth, resembling something of a bull ring. Bucky's eyebrows furrowed slightly. 

“Pym? Isn't he the one that made the suit for that dude that can shrink and get big?” Sam spoke up. You stifled a laugh, shaking your head.

“Your talking about Scott Lang right? Dr. Pym likes to call him Ant-man.” you corrected Sam swiftly. “I worked with Dr. Pym briefly years ago, he owes me a few favors so now Clint gets some cool arrows.” 

“Hell yeah!” Clint said.

“Alright I have to head to the lab soon, I got some new tech for you too Sam so I expect both you and Clint to meet me there tomorrow to play around with it” you pointed your index finger toward sam with a coy grin on your face. 

Sam's eyebrow perked up, “i thought you were a doctor? Like Helen?” he asked with his arms crossed across his chest.

“For your information, I have a very impressive engineering resume. Tony wouldn’t like me so much if I just treated bullet wounds.” grin was still apparent on your face as you spoke. Your sheer confidence intimidated Bucky, whether he’d admit that to himself or not. 

“I have to head out now, it was a pleasure meeting you guys.”

Everyone except Bucky said a short goodbye as your clicking heels faded into the distance slowly. Wanda practically skipped back to the couch to watch her sitcom. Bucky must have been staring too hard because he earned a harsh nudge to his side from Sam. “Dude, you got a bad staring problem.” 

“What?” his eyebrows still furrowed, the creases around his forehead accentuated more. 

“Bucky, you were staring at her lips the moment you walked over here,” Steve added, eyebrows raises and a teased look across his face. Bucky rolled his eyes.

“She had– like something…” Bucky trailed off, motioning his index finger toward his mouth, trying to find the words to describe whatever was in your mouth. “It looked like a ring or something.”

“It's a smiley piercing.”

Bucky winched, “why would it be there though?”

A quick laugh came from Sam as he playfylly slapped his shoulder. “Man, you really are old.”

An offended look grew on Bucky’s face but before he could protest against Sam or send a snarky comment back, Clint spoke up. “Maybe he's just saying that to cover up for thinking she's cute.” Clint teased Bucky, a shit-eating grin across his face. 

“Whatever,” Bucky spoke, deciding his time of relaxing was over and he needed to hit the gym before dinner. 

But before he could leave the room a quick yell from Clint could be heard, “the robots not denying it!” 

Bucky didn’t say anything to entertain that comment. Continuing his way to the gym, followed by a grunt and a quick roll of his eyes. He totally is not thinking of you or your outfits.

*****

It was early morning and the smell of buttermilk pancakes filled bucky’s nostrils, reminding him slightly of when his Ma would cook for him and Steve after a sleepover. But instead, it was Sam making the pancakes, swaying ever so slightly on his feet as he hums to some song. Steve sat next to him with a newspaper in hand. Natasha joined their breakfast a little late, having just come back from a mission. 

Sam handed him a plate of food and it didn’t take long for him to finish it and put the empty plate back in the sink to be cleaned later. Steve piped up, “anyone wants to join me on my run this morning? Sam?”

Sam turned the stove off and put away the dirty mixing bowl, “Nah man, I gotta head outside soon and test out that new tech with Clint”

Natasha's head perked up in interest, asking Sam if he was meeting you. A quick nod and hum in agreement.

“She refuses to tell me what she did to my wings, said it has to be a surprise.” he grinned. Bucky has started to notice the way you’re becoming a prominent member of this ‘team’, with your name seemly popping up in every conversation somehow. 

Everyone was growing to like you more and more. Bucky could understand why that is but so much about you was so unknown, curiosity filled his mind whenever he thought about you. That is, he totally doesn't spend his off time thinking of you.

“I’m more than positive that girl is going to have ahold of the entire team’s tech by the end of the month,” Natasha spoke. “She’s beyond impressive in her element.” 

Bucky thought of a stupid idea for a moment, not being able to hold himself back. “Can I come with?” Bucky asked Sam.

Everyone's head perked towards the brunette, the looks across everyone’s face could only be described as udder amusement but also confusion. 

“I mean, I don't see why not.” Sam shrugged, almost unsure of his answer. 

Natasha scoffed playfully. “I think Clint was right.” 

“What?” Bucky spoke.

“Clint thinks you have a crush on her.” Natasha spoke, sporting an amused grin. “said, and I quote, ‘he was staring at her and her lips like his life depended on it.’”

An almost offended look grew on Bucky’s face, “was not”

Natasha just shrugged, but still wore a smirk on her face as he watched Bucky leave the kitchen next to Sam. Steve's eyes were still locked onto his newspaper like the old man he is but Natasha couldn't contain herself. 

“Can you tell when bucky’s interested in people?” she asked Steve.

Steve thought for a moment, “I mean back then he would talk sweetly to any girl he could get on the dance floor, but now. I’m not so sure.” 

Natasha hummed in response. “I don't know though, bucky was giving her some looks in the lab and also in the common rooms yesterday,” Steve added quickly.

“Interesting.”

On the other side of the building, Sam and sucky walked side by side as they approached the entrance to the training yard. With the shining sunlight hitting their faces, Bucky kinda wished he grabbed sunglasses. 

You and Clint stood in the middle, a couple of meters away from some targets, assuming your arrow test runs have already started. Your head perked towards the two avengers and a warm smile grew on your face as you brought your hand up to shield your eyes from the sun. 

“Hey guys!” you yelled, waving your hand in their direction. Bucky was surprised to see you in just a plain black t-shirt and shorts, your shorts were still very short. But at this point that didn’t surprise him. You greeted the both of them, with a notepad in your hands. “goodmorning” 

“Alright, watcha got for me doc.” Sam started right into it, jokingly rubbing his hands together in greed.

You laughed softly, “we’ll get to you when it's your turn.’

“I’m excited to see Clint use his Pymarrows.” you turned towards Clint with eyes full of pure desire. Bucky might just have a staring problem or he might have just thought you kinda did look cute. 

You pulled a few sets of arrows out of a case and started to ramble on about them, using terms bucky wished he understood. “Okay Clint, you’re going to shoot this arrow up high so the arrow hits straight into the ground, far away from us though.”

You pulled a second arrow out, “and then shoot this one forward right after that so they meet in the air, do you understand? Can you do that?”

Clint nodded yet had a confused look on his face. “Yes, but what's gonna happen?

“You’ll see,” you spoke with a sly smirk, the look on your face concerned the three men. Even more, after a mumbled ‘tony is going to kill me’ escaped your lips.

Clint positioned himself to shoot the arrow high up, and it went up. Next, grabbing the second one from you and swiftly getting in the correct position to hit the first one mid-air, letting the arrow go and as it flew threw the air and came in contact with the first one, Bucky (along with the rest of the group) breath caught in his throat at the sight before him.

 Tony was so going to kill you.

“Holy shit.” Sam breathed out.

The first arrow Clint shot grew ten times its size. hitting straight into the lawn, probably leaving a meter-wide hole as it stood up straight into the air, the height of an old tree. Bucky had to crane his head up to see the top. The three boy’s mouths gaped open at the sight while it looked like you were going to burst from excitement.

“Yes! It worked!” you jumped up and down, dramatically throwing your fist in the air like a child. “That's so fucking cool!”

“Oh my god” was the only thing Clint could say, muttering under his breath with his bow still in his hands. “I feel like I’m not responsible enough for this”

Bucky realized why Natasha spoke so highly of you now, he was utterly impressed and his curiosity only grew larger at this moment. He let out a breath and realized he was in for it now. 

Bucky found somewhere to sit as he watched you work on arrows and other technology as Clint practiced with a plethora of trick arrows. Seeing the look in your eyes as you explain how they worked or watching your invention sparked something in Bucky, you looked like you were glowing. 

Bucky continued to keep close eyes on you while you explained to Sam his new technology, it was also nice seeing Sam's face light up as he tested all his new features, you definitely were having an effect at the compound.

“Hah, soon enough I'll be able to take you easily, Barnes.” Sam snarked towards Bucky.

“In your dreams, Wilson.” a soft smile rose to Bucky’s face. You notice and realized that was the first time you had seen Bucky’s smile.

Sam went back to fly around, testing his new cruise configurations or new thrusters. You were standing closer to Bucky now, your head turned to him. “You should do that more often,” you spoke softly in his direction.

“What?” Bucky’s head turned to see you looking fondly down at him.

“Smile, your smile is nice.” 

Bucky didn’t say anything, he was more than sure a slight red tint grew to his cheeks and the tips of his ears. He panned his head back to Sam, beginning to fidget by playing with the grass on the ground beside him like a small child. You soon joined Bucky, sitting next to him on the ground.

The awkward silence between the two of you killed Bucky, his head panned back over to you soon enough. You were writing down what Bucky assumed to be notes, your tongue slightly sticking out at the corner in concentration. He noted the plainness of your outfit again.

“No cool outfit today?” Bucky asked innocently

Your eyes met his and he crumbled, you smiled so brightly toward him. “You think my outfits are cool?” you spoke, you aren’t going to lie and say you weren't basking in the validation from the super-soldier. You spent too much time and money on your outfits for people to not amend you for it. You felt slightly giddy, today was a good day.

Bucky shrugged in response, fumbling over his words slightly. Losing his focus while you gave him such a look. “I mean, uh– yeah, they're a lot, but they're cool…”

Smooth, so smooth james.

“Thank you,” you said, going back to writing down notes. Bucky let out a breath. “I’m taking advantage of the compounds gym so I don't have to pay a membership at a public one anymore. I came from a workout before this.”

Bucky just nodded and hummed in agreement. Clint cleaned up his arrows and took one last amused look at the still very large arrow sticking out the front of the ground. 

“You gonna take care of that or..?” 

You giggled under your breath, squinting your eyes to look up at Clint. “Yeah, I’ll shrink it down and explain to Tony why theirs a big hole in the ground later. You can go if you’d like, I’ll drop off extra trick arrows later.”

You smiled warmly at Clint and grabbed the rest of his stuff before bidding you goodbye, “tell birdy I said bye, see you later lovebirds!” Clint shouted out as he headed for the doors. You shook your head at the teasing comment. 

Bucky just felt more warmth spread to his ears.

[plentyoffandoms]

Glittery Pink (Part 11) (18+)

Gwi-nam x f/Reader

willing to "flash" a body part

Main Masterlist ♡ All Of Us Are Dead Masterlist ♡ Yoon Gwi-nam Masterlist ♡ Jelly Bracelets Masterlist

Just like all my other stories, this has not been proofread, but please enjoy.

Warnings: Some swearing. Flashing. Mentions vibration panties

Am I late to this fandom? Oh hell, yes, but the show was so good.

Gifs and photos do not belong to me. 1st gif & 2nd @dramastream

YN'S POV:

He said the last part softly, that I didn't think I would hear him, but I did, but I didn't indicate that I heard anything.

I just watched as he tucked himself into his pants, fixed himself up, and got into the front seat.

I sat next to him, looked in the mirror, and silently cursed to myself at how ruined I looked and we haven't even fucked.

The car ride was quiet except for the music playing, and that was perfectly fine with me. I was tired and needed a shower, some toothpaste, and mouthwash.

He parked a block away from the house, and just as I was about to open the door, he told me to wait. I gave him a confused look as he reached in front of me and opened the glove compartment, and handed me a small bag.

I went to open the bag, but he interrupted me once more. "Not here." I didn't question him, even though I had about a thousand going through my head. I put the bag in my backpack.

"I'll be seeing you tomorrow." I said to him as I got out of the passenger side. I closed the door and walked the short distance to my house.

◆

It has been a few hours since I got home, and after a shower, some dinner which I spent with my parents, I am now in my room doing my homework.

I was re-reading a science question when I saw my phone light up from its place on my nightstand.

I ignored it as I needed to get this done.

But whomever it was kept messaging me, and now it has turned into them calling.

I answered the phone, annoyed at the fact that they wouldn't take the hint and leave me alone.

"Hello?"

"YN." Sun-Hee's soft voice was on the other end.

"Sun-Hee, hey."

"I have to tell you something."

"Okay...." I trailed off. I have no idea what she is going to say.

"You know how I mentioned leaving the party with someone? Well, I technically didn't leave....it was his house."

It dawned on me.

"Son Myeong-hwan? No way! How was it?"

Her tone changed as she told me how it was.

"He really had your eyes rolling? Huh, I thought he would have been a selfish lover."

"Me too, but YN, please don't tell Jang-Mi."

It isn't my place tell and I told her that as much. "If this gets serious, you will eventually have to tell her though."

"I don't think it will. We are just having fun, like you and Gwi-nam."

Hearing his name made me remember he gave me a gift, and I still haven't looked at it.

"Hey, I'll see you tomorrow. I just have to finish up this science homework." We hung up the phone.

I grabbed my backpack and pulled out the bag. I opened it, and I could have rolled my eyes at what was in the bag.

A pair of black, lace panties, and there was a note. 'Wear these and let me know.' Odd request, but sure.

I have learned that when he asks me to do something, it is best to just do it.

I finished my homework, laid out my clean uniform with the panties on top and went to bed.

◆

I walked to school the next day and was standing by my locker with Sun-Hee, the two of us whispering about her night with Myeong-hwan. When I saw Gwi-nam come around the corner with his friends around him.

I messaged him this morning, letting him know I was wearing his gift.

Sun-Hee stepped aside when Gwi-nam got close to me, and he put his arms on either side of my head, palms flat against my locker.

He leaned down to talk softly to me.

"You have no idea what you are in for today."

Was all he said before he walked away. I was clearly confused and wanted to chase after him, but the sound of the bell had me going to my first period.

Gwi-nam's POV:

I just had to wait for our first class together, and then I will start my fun. I can feel the remote in my pocket, already have the settings memorised.

I hardly paid attention to whatever the teacher was drowning on and on about, my mind completely occupied with what happened in the back of my car yesterday.

The feeling of being in her warm mouth and coming down her throat had me biting my fist and trying to think of anything gross to get me to calm down.

The bell rang and could have run to my next class as that is the class with YN. She was already sitting there, and I was close enough.

So, I put it on the first setting. The lowest one. I watched as she stopped writing what was on the board, looked down at her lap with a confused look on her face.

I took my seat behind her. I leaned over the desk to whisper in her ear once more.

"I told you, you have no idea what you are in for today. We are going to have so much fun."

"Gwi-nam, please tell me these are not..." I interrupted her.

"Oh, but they are. Now be a good girl, and pay attention. Class is about to start." And just on cue, our teacher walked in.

◆

I kept it on the lowest setting until she got called upon, and I knew it was perfect timing.

She was just about to finish the answer when I turned it up as high as it could go. The moan that left her mouth had everyone looking at her concerned as YN covered her mouth with her hand.

"Are you okay?" Our teacher asked and all YN could do was nod her head yes.

"Maybe you should go see the nurse." I didn't want the fun to end, and I guess neither did she because she shook her no.

"No, I am good." And she answered the question. I turned the vibrating panties off to give her a break.

I didn't want another teacher to think about sending her to a nurse or sending her home. So I had to bid my time.

The bell rang, signalling the end of the class. I waited outside the classroom for YN. Our classmates who were standing around outside the room were whispering and talking amongst themselves.

They quieted down when YN walked out and averted their gaze ones I put my arm around her shoulders, and the two of us walked away.

I pulled her into the same empty classroom as before and closed the door behind us.

"Sit on the table." I told her, and I watched with glee as she did as I asked. Once she was settled, I grabbed her and snapped the Glittery Pink one.

Willing to "flash" a body part.

"Lift up your skirt. I want to see how soaked you are." I grabbed another chair and pulled it up in front of her. I sat down and waited for her to lift the hem of her skirt.

"Gwi-nam, maybe."

"Now." My tone was all she needed to realise I wasn't playing around. She lifted her skirt, and just as she did that, I put it back on the highest setting.

Her back arched, and she flung back her head. She leaned back on her elbows and tried to close her legs, but I made sure to grip them and keep them apart.

"Don't you dare close them. I want to watch you fall apart for me."

Her body was shaking. She had tears streaming down her face and she never looked more gorgeous than she does at this very moment.

But I needed more.

I stood up and put my body between her legs. I reached down between our bodies and placed my palm right where the vibrator was and pushed it even harder against her clit and pussy.

My other hand lifted her shirt to just below her chin. I groped her tits through her bra, but I needed more.

I pulled the cups up and leaned down and took a nipple into my mouth, and groped the other one. I switched and gave the same treatment to the other one.

"Gwi-nam," She said, my name softly, and then it slowly turned into a chant. She was so close.

"You close princess? Need to cum?" I pushed even harder against her pussy.

"Please." She begged. I let go of her breast and gripped the back of her head, slammed my lips against hers, almost forgetting my plan for her.

"No." I mumbled against her lips as I took my hands away from her quivering body and took a step back and turned off the panties.

"What? What the fuck Gwi-nam?" She was pissed. She was so close to a big orgasm, but I took that away from her.

"When you cum today and you will, it will be on my tongue. Now fix yourself up and meet me for lunch. You are sitting with me."

I left her there, tits out, tear streaked face, and her calling out my name in frustration.

Blue (Part 10) (18+) ♧ Green (Part 12) (18+)

Gwi-nam taglist: @thefrogqueen8

[rrenzwrld]

mama’s baby, daddy’s maybe

in which connie is a famous basketball player who has a secret baby with his best friend

this is part 6! the second to last part to mbdm :( and it’s kinda long bc it switches povs.. sorry y’all! but anyways, hope you enjoy! read the 5th part here and here, read part 4 here!

tags; @beautifulalienslimecroissant @neptunes1nterweb @yourrfavzxri @iikatsukii

After the outing, Connie and I had gotten closer in the following weeks. As busy as he was as the nation’s athlete, he still had enough time to set aside for me and Celest. The only reason he probably didn’t mind spending time with the baby was because she came along with me. It got to the point where it looked like he was growing attached and as far as he knew, he wasn’t her father. He thought he was just stepping in as an outside source.

Today I had took off for a doctor’s appointment for Celest where she’d be getting shots. I talked to Connie that morning and my plans slipped up so I should’ve known he would’ve wanted to go with me.

“But don’t you have a game?” I wedged my phone between my ear and neck as I buckled in a busy Celest.

“Yeah but that’s not until 7. Y’know, I just wanna be there for support.” At first glance, I didn’t see nothing wrong with it until I considered the situation again. Plus the fact that he was a celebrity and could be recognized going to a pediatrician with a random lady and her baby.

“I guess.. you gon meet me there?”

“Yeah just send me the address. I’ll get there before you anyways.”

I scoffed. “Boy you better not be tryna speed through these streets. I can’t afford your bail.”

“You won’t need to. Imma call you when I get there.” And with that we said our goodbyes and hung up before I started on my way.

And Connie was in fact there before me.

“Told you.” He smirked, making fun of the fact that I didn’t believe him. Celest was starting to fall asleep again on my shoulder but once she saw Connie, she woke up immediately.

He took his shades off as Celest wiggled out my arms to run into his. “At least someone’s happy to see me. Estrellita!” He calls her Estrellita, which means little star in spanish as I’ve been told and that’s interesting because the inspiration for her name came from his.. Constance. His name always reminded me of the stars and how beautiful they were as constellations on some nights, which is what I saw every time I looked at him and now see every time I look at my baby. I really need to find a way on how to break the news to him.

Once we got in and we’re now waiting for the lady to come in.

“Y’know you didn’t have to come, right? You probably had something else to do.”

Connie shook his head as he held onto Celest in his lap. “Nah, I like spending time with yall. Especially this lil girl.” He tickled her sides, which made her squirm.

I didn’t know what I was thinking to prompt me to say what was next. “Actually Connie, there’s—“ but luckily the pediatrician came just in time

She greeted us as she walked in and was surprised to see Connie in the chair because normally it’s just Celest and I.

She looked at me and then looked at Connie and Celest. “Are you dad?” My eyes widened. He was dad but he didn’t know he was dad. All Connie did was laugh because I could see that he didn’t know how to react.

“Nah, um… just a friend.”

“Oh!” She laughed. “You and the baby look so much alike I thought you were dad.” Connie slowly turned his head to look at me and I slowly turned my head in the opposite direction.

“Just probably been around her for too long.” The pediatrician started somehow laughing harder than before. I wanted to leave now for a multitude of reasons. But once I finished talking to her about Celest and the type of shots she’d be given today, everything was almost over.

“Does she like shots?” Connie leaned over to me after the pediatrician left to get the supplies for the shots.

I laughed a bit. “Who likes to get shots?” He rolled his eyes.

“I’m sayin does she cry and stuff?”

“She’ll cry but only for a lil bit. I got her if you can’t—“

“Nah, she cool. I got her.” The cart rolled in and Celest started to whine and get antsy. I hated when she’d get shots because I’d always cry with her, but it helped when Connie was here.

The first looked to be the most painful for her but she didn’t cry all that much but that was probably because Connie held onto her so tightly, making sure she wouldn’t wiggle around. After the first, the second floor one came and went so it was over by this point and Celest’s little thighs were decorated with pretty pink butterfly bandaids.

“See?” The pediatrician began putting the stuff away. “Wasn’t that bad, right?” She tickled at Celest’s tummy and of course she laughed even through her teary eyes. Connie on the other hand, looked like he was fighting back tears himself.

When we left, Connie had put his shades back on as he walked to my car to buckle Celest in.

“Thank you for coming Connie, I appreciated your… support.”

“Anytime.. you coming to the game later?” I didn’t know if I wanted to go through that hassle again. “I’ll find a way to get yall in—“

“It’s okay, we’ll just watch you on tv.”

He raised a brow. “You sure? Don’t wanna be there for the real thing?”

He made me giggle like a high school girl. “I have the real thing right here. And plus, Cee will watch you better at home anyways.”

“Alrighty pretty girl.. you better be watching.”

“Or what?” He was close enough to rattle the fluttering in my stomach. He stood in front of me for a while, gently biting on his lips but I couldn’t see his eyes because they were hidden.

He scoffed. “You’ll find out,” He pecked me on my cheek. “Bye, love you!” Before quickly getting into his car and speeding off. ‘Love you..?’

(📞switching sides) CONNIE

After the game, all I could think about was the events of today and what the pediatrician lady said. My mind was so set on that, I didn’t even go to the club like the team would always do after winning a game to celebrate. Everyone went to the club that night except for Onyankopon. Him and I were the closest on the team and he’s always had my back through everything since joining the team. When I was first starting out in the pro world, he was the one who didn’t mind helping me out. He was only a few years older than me but he was like a brother.

Instead of going to the club, we went to Jean’s house to hang out with him and Sasha. We had a few drinks and played a few games and even though it’s minimal, having the time to wind down with them was always enjoyable.

They knew all about my time with Celest and Chy’anne but they haven’t really asked any questions about them until now, which was strange. I even told them about today at the pediatrician’s and what I was feeling with that, thinking they’d just brush me off to talk about something else but…

“So she asked if you were the dad because you and the baby look alike?” Jean basically repeated what I told him.

“Yeah and I told her that I was Chy’anne’s friend—“

“Y’know she wouldn’t just ask something like that for no reason, right?” He had a point but I assumed he was bullshitting.

I narrowed my eyes at him “What you tryna say?”

“You got a picture of the baby?”

“Whoa—“

“Shut up,” He snapped at Sasha while reaching out for my phone. “I’m tryna see something..” I brought up a family picture from Chy’anne’s page and handed the phone over.

Once he was looking at the picture, Sasha and Ony leaned over his shoulder to look. Ony kept looking between me and the phone while Sasha covered her mouth with her eyes widened. Their dramatic reactions were making me nervous.

“What?”

“I don’t know if you’re just being dumb on purpose or what but…”

“That baby yours, G.”

“Gimme that shit..” I snatched the phone from Jean’s hands and my heart felt like it was gonna pump out my chest. I glanced at the picture before turning the phone off. “Stop playin with me. That baby look so much like Chy’anne, you can’t even really tell who—“

“Keep telling yourself that~” I don’t know why I felt so worked up if I knew Celest wasn’t mine, right? How could she be?

“A blind person can see that’s your daughter, Connie.”

“Nah, fuck that. Chy’anne wouldn’t do that to me. I know her.”

“Do you?” My eyes met Ony’s. “A person can change a lot in two years.” Again, a point was made but it wasn’t nearly enough to convince me. To me, the idea of her daughter being mine was a crazy idea because I knew the type of person she was and I knew she wouldn’t keep such a thing from me for so long.

“And why do you think she’d do that?” Jean added.

“I don’t know, maybe she was going through some shit or something.”

Jean rolled his eyes. “Obviously, but maybe she had a reason why she hid the baby from you.”

I had to laugh a lil bit because it was getting ridiculous now. To the point where I might have started feeling paranoid. “I’m telling you, that’s not my baby. Love her to death but she’s not mine to claim. If she was really my child, I’m sure I’d know about it by now.”

Jean sighed like he was frustrated that I wasn’t believing them. I chose not to believe them because I know how I’d feel if that really was the case and I just didn’t wanna face my feelings if that was a possibility.

“What happened two years ago?” I didn’t know why Jean was asking a question he knew the answer to.

“You know what happened—“

“Wait what happened two years ago?” Ony stopped me. “You just told me you and the girl were friends, you didn’t tell me y’all had history and shit.”

“Basically,” I dreaded telling this story again so I just summed it up. “Her and I were real close. Best friends since diapers and she’s always supported me because I played ball but she stopped talking to me right before I was drafted. Haven’t talked for two years since then until now.”

“Damn.”

“You’re missing something, Connie.” Sasha spoke up but I was confused.

“How you gonna tell me what I’m missing in my story?” Jean and Sasha exchanged looks. My mind was searching for what they were trying to remind me until I finally realized it all in a few seconds. It was like everything came rushing back all at one time. I then recognized the event as the night that changed everything. I guess I had completely shut down because someone had to get my attention a few times.

“You remember now?”

I nodded and tried swallowing the dry knot in my throat. “Yeah, we had sex. Right before I was getting ready to go to California. I remember it being an issue because we were friends until.. we did that. And then her sister told me she was sick and stuff but I didn’t pay attention to it at the time.”

“And maybe, just maybe,” Jean raised his hands. “She was sick because she was just finding out she was pregnant.” Now that I remembered everything, what Jean said made sense and I’d only find out the real truth if I asked her up front.

“Okay but, why would she keep a whole baby from me for two years? Why would she do that to me?” Anger, frustration, confusion and everything in between started to rise inside of me but I tried brushing it off. Although I wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt, the fact that we potentially had a daughter together that I didn’t know about and that I could’ve been there for, made me feel betrayed.

“See, that is what I don’t know. Up to you to figure out.” Sooner or later, that is what I aimed to find the answer to

she WILL tell him in the next part, i PROMISE😭 and everything will unfold for the lil finale, just stay tuned <3

[emilyssky]

War Of Hearts // JJ Maybank

PAIRING: JJ Maybank! x fem!reader

WORD COUNT: 13.7k

GENRE(S): smut, angst, fluff, fuck buddies to lovers

WARNINGS: smut [ praise, degradation, fingering, dirty talk, oral sex, choking, slapping, spanking] , mentions of violence, mentions of blood, swearing, mentions of alcohol, smoking. Jealous and protective JJ !

Author's note:Wrote this last night after finishing season 3, hope you’ll like it :)

SUMMARY: 

You and JJ have been messing around for a few months now until you try to cut it off because of your growing feelings for him that you think are one sided. A series of unfortunate events bring you face to face with unexpected fear and your relationship with JJ when you get caught up in their treasure hunt. 

I've always loved summer. Something about the warm weather, the sun, the ocean, and the salt on my skin made me feel alive. For the most part, I loved my life in ΟΒΧ. Some would say that I was born blessed, that I got both sides of the coin with my mom being a pogue and my dad being a kook but it feels mostly like a curse to me. My whole life I've never been fully accepted by either side. I wasn't t rich and snobby enough for the Kooks and never wild and spontaneous enough for the Pogues. It's not like I was on bad terms with anyone, everyone was friendly enough but ever since I could remember I felt left out, never having real friends. And if I'm being honest, it wasn't the kooks that I was jealous of, something about the pogue life pull me in. It seemed exciting and freeing in a way. When my mom married my dad and had me she knew that she wanted me to grow up knowing both sides. She wanted to offer me the chance to be the one to choose where I belong. She's big on following your heart and dreams and always told me growing up that I'll find my way and that if I follow my gut, the choice is gonna be pretty easy. We lived in Figure 8 but my mom opened a cafe on the south side, wanting to keep in touch with that side of her life. My life is a series of the same things over and over again. I like spending time alone, if I'm not at school or working my shift at the cafe, I'll probably be by the beach, reading or surfing. Sometimes I will go on boat rides with my dad or steal the keys and go by myself. It's not often that I will hang out with the Kooks, in fact, Sarah Cameron is probably the only person that I would voluntarily hang out with and actually enjoy it. And when it comes to the Pogues, everyone knows that it's just Kie and her boys. I'm friendly with all of them, occasionally have chat with or enjoy the waves together but that's about it.

Today is a day exactly like any other; I finished school and came straight to the cafe. It was not too crowded, with only a few regular customers enjoying their usual cup of coffee. I was behind the counter, cleaning the coffee machines, making sure everything was full and ready until I heard them. It's the group of kids that you hear before you see. John B enters first, pushing his long brown hair back as he laughs at something Pope is saying. I like John B, we share a lot in common and have nice conversations from time to time. He's a really fun and social person but this year was a rough one for him. His dad went missing almost a year ago, many people consider him dead by now but John B will not accept it, he still thinks he's alive, somewhere lost at sea. My mom and his dad were close back in the day before she met my dad and moved to figure 8. We used to play together when we were young up until he met his current best friends. My dad offered him a few jobs involving our boat and at the cafe, after Big John disappeared so I've been seeing him around more lately. Pope and Kiara follow right behind him. Me and Kie used to be close, but now our relationship has changed into a few talks here and there, I still consider her one of my closest friends though. Pope is fun. He's one of the few people that talks to me normally and always makes me feel comfortable at social events or parties. And lastly, my favourite pogue follows. JJ Maybank. Me and JJ have an interesting relationship. Teasing, flirting, bickering, that's his speciality with every girl in the Outer Banks, kook or pogue but sometimes I like to think that he actually enjoys my company. He was always the one I was looking forward to see but today he's the one I'm trying to avoid and have been trying for the past 2 weeks. His blue eyes find mine the minute he walks through the door, and a smirk spreads across his face.

"Hey, Y/n" John B greets me, reaching the counter.

"I'm not serving you free coffee." I immediately shake my head, knowing exactly what they want.

"Oh, come on." He frowns his thick brows, fake pouting.

I let a small chuckle at his attempt. "How many times do you think it will take for my mum to notice?"

"One more?" He offers, lifting his shoulders.

I scoff, shaking my head again.

"Come on, your mum loves me anyway." He presses.

"Yeah, but my dad not so much."

JJ places his elbows on the counter, right next to John B, and I immediately look down, continuing cleaning the coffee machine like I was doing before they came in.

"What if I'm the one asking?" He says, leaning in with that playful smile of his that I know all too well.

"Then it's defiantly a no." I fake a tight smile.

"Why so grumpy today princess?" He places a hand over his heart.

I roll my eyes and turn back to John B. He brings his palms together, begging me silently.

I sigh. "This is the last time." I point my finger at both of them.

"Yes!" They high-five each other.

"I'll bring it over." I wave them off.

I lift my eyes to his only for a second, catching the wink he sends my way as he follows John B to their usual table where Kie and Pope are seated.

I quickly fix up 4 iced coffees and walk over to them.

"Here you go."

"You're the best." John B touches my side lightly.

"You're coming next Saturday right?" Kie asks reaching for her coffee.

"What's next Saturday?" I question placing the last coffee on the table.

"We're throwing a party on the beach. It's gonna be fun." Pope explains.

"You're coming." JJ states without looking my way.

"I'll see." I nod at Kie with a small smile before leaving them to it. I walk back to the safety of my counter feeling his eyes burning on my back. The parties here at obx were always good. It's the one time that Kooks and Pogues can coexist in one place without jumping on each other's throats. Well, sometimes at least. It's fun nevertheless, all of us drinking and dancing by the beach forgetting our responsibilities and problems for a little while. I stay behind the counter, doing any task possible to distract myself but anytime I let my gaze fall his way, he's already looking.

"Thanks for the coffee Y/n." John B waves at me as they leave about an hour later.

"See you at the party cupcake." He brings two fingers to his forehead.

"Maybe." I shrug, walking to their table to clean up.

"You know I'll be miserable without you." He yells already out the door.

.  .  .  .

I don't usually work on Fridays, so after school, you'll probably find me at the beach if I'm not locked in my room. I enjoy my alone time. Riding the waves, sitting under the sun with a good book, or drawing in my sketchbook. Today my mind felt a little heavier, so I took my time, and before I knew it the sun began setting. I quickly throw my bag over my shoulder and begin to make my way back, realising that it's almost dinner time. I silently curse at myself for not riding my bike to the beach cause the walk back to Figure 8 seems dreadful. My ears perk up catching the sound of a motorcycle approaching with speed and I close my eyes hoping that it's not him but when I hear the motorcycle slowing down I know that my hope is not coming true. He stops beside me and I stop walking, turning to look at him. His hair is pushed back by the wind, he's wearing a simple white t-shirt with grey cargo pants, and his face is as pretty as always. My eyes narrow a little as I spot a bruise over his right cheekbone and it doesn't take long before I spot all the different marks and scars across his face.

He still forces a smug smile on his lips, ignoring my staring. "Having an afternoon surfing session princess?"

"What happened?" My eyes can't stop studying his face.

"Oh, you know the Kooks had it coming." He shrugs, masking his face perfectly like he always does but I know better.

"JJ." I trail off, my stomach tightening knowing exactly where he got these injuries from.

His jaw tightens. "It's nothing' Y/n. Same old, same old." I shake my head, in disgust. I can't even stand the thought that his dad walks around the OBX freely. He's such a piece of shit. "Get on the bike." He nods behind him.

"It's fine, I'll walk." I tilt my chin.

He scoffs with a smirk. "When will you stop with this whole act you’re putting on?" He waves his hand around.

I change the weight from my right to my left leg, crossing my arms. "I don't know what you're talking about." I keep my face expressionless, ignoring the way his beaten face cause my heart to tighten.

His eyebrows come together and his gaze shifts, dropping the playful act. "You're ignoring me." He states.

I'm trying.

I avoided his eyes cause I know that the more I look at them the weaker I get. It happens every time, I say that I'm gonna stand my ground and then I find myself beside him regardless.

"Look," He clears his throat, eyes moving everywhere. A weird expression takes over his features and I immediately know that he feels uncomfortable. "I don't care why you're pushing me away but can you stop ignoring me for a few hours?" He struggles to speak the words and that makes me a little warm inside. I glance at his bruised face once more, remembering all the times he came to me after his fights with his father. All the long talks we would have in order to get his mind off of it or the times I would sneak him through my window to treat his injuries.

I sigh and silently climb behind him, wrapping my arms around his waist. I feel him chuckle. "Just so you know, we're just talking."

"Sure." I can't see his face but I bet he's grinning.

He took his time, driving aimlessly around the streets of OBX. I don't mind though, I know him enough to know that it helps him clear his head, so I stay silent resting my head against his back and enjoying the ride. The sun has set and the night breeze tingles my skin in the best way. I notice that he takes the familiar route to my house.

"Are your parents home?" He yells, looking behind his shoulder.

"Yeah, I think."

"We'll have to be quiet then." He clicks his tongue.

"Like that has stopped you before." I smile against his shoulder.

"True." He glances at me again, the corners of his mouth lifting.

He parks his bike a block down from my house and he walks quietly around the back while I go from the front door.

"Hey, honey." My mom yells from the kitchen at the sound of the door opening.

"Hey, mom." I enter the kitchen, sneaking my arms around her waist while she chops some cucumbers, preparing a salad for dinner.

"Dinner will be ready soon." She smiles.

"Oh, I'm not hungry, I already ate." I brush her off, walking to the fridge.

"It smells amazing dear." My dad enters the kitchen, dropping his keys on the kitchen table.

My mom flashes a smile at my dad before turning back to me. "When did you eat?"

"I hung out with Kie by the beach and we had some sandwiches."  I quickly make up an excuse, grabbing a water bottle and closing the fridge.

"Just Kiara?" My dad lifts an eyebrow.

"Yes dad," I sigh.

"Honey." My mom scolds him.

"What?" He lifts his shoulders. "I'm sorry that I don't want my daughter hanging around boys that smoke weed, get drunk, and steal shit on the daily."

"Mark." She glares at him.

"They're not stealing anything, dad." I narrow my eyes, sick of him attacking them all the time. "They're not like that, you don't know them."

"Well, some of them are." He continues and I know exactly who he's referring to.

"You're wrong" I shake my head, lifting my hands. " and you're not gonna tell me who I can and can't hang out with." I walk past him shooting him a glare and head up the stairs.

"Y/n." I hear my mom yell but I ignore her and hurry into my room, slamming the door shut and locking it.

JJ's shoulder is rest against the open window, arms crossed in front of him with an unreadable expression. I drop my gaze to the floor, walking to sit on my bed and placing the bottle on my nightstand, feeling a little ashamed for the way my dad spoke about him and his friends.

"I'm sorry for my dad." I feel the need to say.

He moves to sit next to me, forcing a tight smile on his lips. "It's fine, we all know his opinion about the south side."

I move my head, trying to get a better look at him. "Hey, are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah princess you don't have to worry about me." The nickname tugs at my heart almost as much as his smile.

I reach to touch his hair, pushing them back and toying with the short hair at the nape of his neck. "You know you can talk to me."

His eyes twitch with suppressed emotion, his jaw set with eyebrows frowned. "I know."  I offer him a small smile, not moving my hand. "Can you, like, talk to me?" He asks. His eyes are screaming even though he manages to keep his expression under control. "I want you to take my mind off things, just talk to me about anything." His tone is almost begging.

I bring my knees to my chest, wrap my arms around them and turn to face him. 'What do you wanna know about this time? My weird obsession with serial killer documentaries, my views on feminism, or if I put the milk or cereal first?"

His face breaks into the first real smile today and I feel a little proud. He shakes his head lightly, his eyes not leaving mine before he pulls me by the neck, smashing his lips to mine. It's like all the pain he carries and all the words he desperately wants to say are spoken by the way he moves his lips hungrily against mine. The softness of his mouth contrasts his rough breathing as his hands hold my face, pulling me closer to him. His small groan that echoes through the room and the feeling of his tongue brushing over mine snaps me back to reality.

"Jay," I whimper, pushing at his chest lightly.

His lips leave mine but our foreheads stay together. "I'm sorry." He mumbles, inhaling short, sharp breaths.

My fingers trace his bruises and my stomach twists even at the thought of how his dad created them. I hate how he grew up having to hide all this pain and I hate how he's being treated. "I don't want you to go back to him tonight." I whisper and his eyes snap to mine. "Stay with me."

His face finally breaks, and the emotion in his eyes overtakes his whole expression.

"But we're just sleeping," I lean back, pointing my finger at him. "and you'll have to leave before my parents wake up."

His eyes water a bit but a grin paints his lips as he wraps his arms around me, pushing me back to the bed.

A giggle escapes me. Damn him.

. . . . . . . .

"I'm going with Topper." Sarah touches up her already perfect makeup.

"Ugh." I groan. "What do you even see in him?" I scrunch up my nose. Sarah is the only kook that I can stand to hang out with. And the only Cameron I actually like.

"He's nice." She rolls her eyes at me, holding up two dresses, one yellow and one blue. "Stop being a bitch to him. Which one?"

I tilt my head." The yellow one obviously."

"What are you wearing?" She questions while peeling off her clothes and changing into the short yellow dress.

"I don't know if I want to go." I lay back down on her king-size bed.

"Come on, you love parties. Is it that you don't wanna go or that you don't wanna see a certain someone?" She wiggles her brows at me.

"I'm just not in the mood." I shrug, looking away but she sees right through me.

"Yeah right." She chuckles. "Cut the shit and get dressed." She throws a black shirt on me.

. . . . . 

The beach is full of people, kooks, and pogues dancing, drinking, and having fun. Big barrels of beer everywhere, stands with bottles of alcohol and hundreds of red cups here and there. It's not even midnight and everyone is already wasted. Most of the girls are in their bikinis by now, dancing like there's no tomorrow on top of giant rocks. The minute we enter the party, I go straight for the beer, pouring myself a cup. My eyes silently search the crowd for any sight of his fluffy, blonde hair, or of any of his friends. I spot Kie and Pope taking shots with a few other people and John B just a few meters again, flirting with a blonde girl but he's nowhere to be found.

"Looking for someone?" Rafe says close to my ear, catching me off guard and making me flinch away. He smiles at my reaction.

"What are you doing here?" He's one of the people that rarely joins things like this. He and his friends really don't get along with the pogues, unlike me and Sarah. I try my best to limit my contact with Rafe, Topper, and the rest of their little group but somehow they find a way to be right in my face.

"Enjoying the free alcohol." He lifts the cup to his lips, hiding his smile. "What are you doing here?"

I take a sip of my beer. "I came with Sarah."

He nods, eyeing me up and down. "You look gorgeous as always."

I roll my eyes at his compliment. "Thanks."

"You know," He leans in closer. "you're always cold towards us but when it comes to these pogues you're a fucking angel. Why is that?"

I sigh out loud, not really in the mood to deal with his whining. "Cause I can. " I offer him a smile before walking away, blending in with the dancing crowd.

It didn't take more than 4 cups of alcohol, to find myself dancing between a few half-naked girls, that are probably as drunk as I am. My body has a mind of its own as I swing my hips to the beat of some '00 song. I lost sight of Sarah half an hour ago when she disappeared with Topper, and I joined Kie and Pope and took a few shots before throwing myself between the sweaty bodies, pretending that the fact that JJ is still nowhere to be found does not affect me at all. He's a known player around the Obx, sleeping around, flirting his way through, breaking hearts left and right and I've had my fair share of it. But the game he's playing is a dangerous one, and I'm trying to protect myself the best way I can.

"Shots!." John B yells, throwing his hands in the air, holding a bottle of tequila in his right one. A few girls extend their cups for him to pour them some but I've probably dropped mine while dancing cause it's not between my fingers anymore.

I tap on his shoulder to get his attention. "Hit me!" I yell over the music and open my mouth wide.

"Let's go!" He yells pouring a shot straight into my mouth. The alcohol drips down my chin as I try to swallow, my eyes watering at the process.

"Another one." John B says and taps my chin waiting for me to open my mouth again and I do. All eyes are suddenly on us, everyone is cheering and yelling as I shallow my fourth shot in a row and I feel two hands grabbing me by the legs and lifting me higher. I throw my hands in the air, laughing as the people around me scream louder. My mind is somewhere else, and I let the carefree feeling and numbness that comes with alcohol overtake me. Until I open my eyes. I sober up in a second when my eyes find his. His on top of a rock, smoking with a few other people. A girl leans in towards him, her hand wrapping around him as she laughs at something Pope said but he stays unbothered, his eyes still on me as he lifts his cup my way with a nod and a smile. I nod back not knowing what to do before turning back to the girls I was dancing with. I continue moving to the music but my mind isn't letting me shake him off. Suddenly, the alcohol feels heavy in my stomach and the sound of my heartbeat is louder than the music in my ears. My hand flies to my mouth as I run out of the dancing crowd and as far away as I can from the people before dropping to my knees and vomiting in a bag full of used cups. I feel two hands reaching for my hair as all the alcohol that I consumed leaves my system.

"It's okay, I got you." I hear Rafe's voice over the music that has faded a bit due to the distance. "Here" He hands me a napkin.

"Thank you." I cough out, taking the napkin, and bringing it to my lips.

"Hold on, let me bring you some water."

I wipe my mouth and drop the napkin inside the trash bag.

"Here." He pushes a cup of water into my hand, tugging my hair behind my ear as I take a few sips of the water slowly. "Stop drinking so much Y/n, Jesus."

"I'm okay." I rise to my feet.

"Come on," His hand wraps around my waist. "let's take you home yeah?" He starts pulling me towards the other side of the beach.

"I don't think she's going anywhere with you Cameron." My head snaps to the right, hearing Rafe scoff at the sight of JJ. JJ's eyes twitch when they fall on me, his eyebrows coming together.

"I don't think you have a saying in what she does pogue." Rafe's hands drop from my body as he takes a step forward.

JJ's expression shifts in a second when he moves his eyes from me to Rafe, a smile spreading over his lips. "Oh I think I do," He takes a step forward as well. "And she's not going anywhere with you." His voice drops a little.

"I suggest you take a step back." Rafe doesn't back down.

JJ's eyes darken. "Or what?" He takes yet another step. "Last time I checked you're still nipping at her heels and following her around in case she pities you and gives you a chance."

Rafe lets out a growl, pushing JJ backwards but he just laughs mockingly, knowing he hit a nerve but that angers Rafe more.

I step between them before Rafe can make another move. "Stop acting like five-year-olds." I look at both of them, but they ignore me, not taking their eyes off each other.

"Hey," My hand touches Rafe's chest, forcing his eyes away from JJ. "go back to the party, I'll let you know when I'm ready to leave." I lie, knowing that it's the only way to make him walk away without creating a scene cause trying to make JJ drop this would be even harder. Rafe's eyes narrow, flickering back to JJ. I reach for his hand, softening my tone. "I'll find you." I nod, trying to reassure him.

He nods back, letting out a sigh. "Turn him down kindly babe." He says, knocking JJ's shoulder with his as he walks out.

JJ's eyes are fixated on me. "You'll let him know when you're ready to leave huh?" He says when Rafe's far enough.

"Maybe." I play along, shrugging my shoulders.

His tongue comes out to wet his pink lips, hands resting on his hips as he takes a step towards me. "Is that so?"

"Last time I checked I can go home with anyone I want." I cross my arms, trying not to let my gaze drop to his lips.

"We both know that I would never let that happen." His voice drops, his tone raspier.

"Why JJ?" I tilt my head upwards due to our height difference but that doesn't stop me from taking a step forward as well, only leaving a few inches between us.

His fingers wrap around my neck, catching me off guard. "Come on now princess, let's not play dumb." He smirks.

"I'm not playing dumb. Actually, I'm done playing." I wrap my hand around his wrist, pulling it away from my neck.

Something flashes over his eyes but doesn't stay for long. "Trust me, I'm done playing as well." He mumbles before cupping my jaw with both hands, not letting me escape and in a split second his lips crush into mine. My breath hitches as the taste of weed and beer coats my tongue but I'd be lying if I say that I haven't missed it. It's been a week since the last time I kissed him and since then I've tried to keep myself at a distance, knowing that the more I let this go on the more invested I become, and knowing JJ, it will not end up well If I do. He lets out a low moan as his tongue enters my mouth, colliding passionately with mine. My fingers grab his shirt for support, my body suddenly overwhelmed by the familiar knot in my stomach that begins to build.

"Fuck, I missed you baby." He breaks the kiss, allowing me to take a much-needed breath. I dare to lift my eyes, looking up at him through my eyelashes, only to find him looking hungrily down at me. His hands travel from my jaw, down to the curve of my waist and he pulls my body to his. "You kept me waiting for so long." He breathes out, resting his forehead on mine.

"JJ" My tone begging and warning at the same time. "We shouldn't be doing this."

"You can not name a single good reason for us not to." He says, running his thumb over my bottom lip.

"I can name a few."

His hands drop to my ass and in a swift move, he lifts me off the ground forcing my legs to wrap around his waist. "I'd rather hear other sound out of that pretty mouth of yours." He starts walking away from the party, keeping his hands secure under my thighs and crashing his lips to mine once again. He makes sure we're far enough from the crowd and behind plenty of trees and bushes before stopping and dropping me carefully on the sand. He breaks the kiss, straightening his body and reaching to peel off his white long-sleeve shirt.

"You look fucking amazing tonight." He doesn't break eye contact. "I was hard from the minute I saw you walk in." He leans back down, his eyes roaming over my body as if he hasn't seen it in ages.

My hands reach for the ends of my shirt, pulling it over my head. "Fuck." He dives hungrily into my naked chest. Sucking, nibbling, and biting. He squeezes my boobs between his palms, rolling his tongue over my nipples, making them harder by the second. His wet lips slide down my stomach teasingly as his fingers toy with the button of my shorts before finally unbuttoning it. He drags it down my legs, leaving me in my black panties, exposed and ready for him. Somehow I always find myself in this position as much as I'm trying to avoid it but the sight of him desperately fumbling with his belt as his eyes devour my body is one that I'll never get enough of.

I lift myself onto my knees, lowering my body so I'm facing his crotch. I pull down his shorts along with his boxers freeing his already hard member. A small moan escapes my lips at the sight, my mouth watering. His thumb and index finger reach for my jaw, tilting my head to meet his dark gaze.

"I want your eyes on me as you choke on my dick, okay princess?" He says and I'm aflame from head to toe. He takes his dick in his other hand, pumping it a few times before dragging the tip across my lips, coating them with his leaking precum. I keep my eyes locked on his wild blue ones as I take him in my mouth.

"Fuck" He curses under his breath as I twirl my tongue around the tip. I replace his hand with mine, taking him deeper, the size of him weighing on my tongue. I relax my jaw, allowing almost his whole member to enter my mouth. His hands fist my hair while his hips begin to thrust forward, lightly fucking himself in my mouth.

"You're so fucking good at this baby." He praises me. "Look at you choking on it, that's it." I force myself to breathe through my nose while saliva starts dripping from my mouth down to my chin. He fastens his pace only for a few seconds before, pulling my head sharply back by my hair, his dick dropping from my mouth as I gasp for air.

He groans out loud. "I missed this."

His words sink in as much as I try not to let them. It's always 'I missed this' and never 'I missed you.'

He connects our lips again, tasting himself while he pushes me down on my back. His fingers run over my clothed pussy, and that's enough to make my back arch, silently begging him for more. My body responds to him in ways that I can't explain or control. Just a touch and he has me already panting. He pulls my underwear to the side opening my folds with his middle finger.

"Ugh." I gasp.

"Shit baby, you're already dripping." He whispers satisfied against my lips. His mouth falls to the curve of my neck, sucking on my skin as his fingers begin to rub circles over my clit making tiny moans escape me. Unexpectedly, he slides two fingers inside me, quickly building a fast pace.

"Oh, my god." I shut my eyes, pleasure creeping into my lower belly.

"You respond to me so well princess." He kisses me, capturing my bottom lip between his teeth. His fingers pump in and out of me, making my breath shorter as the pleasure builds.

"God Jay, I'm gonna-" The words die in my throat and the flicker of his thumb on my clit sends me unexpectedly over the edge. My orgasm rushes over me like a wave, my body going numb for a few seconds, gasps and moans leaving my lips.

"That's it baby, ride it out." His pace slows down a bit before pulling his fingers out. He leaves wet kisses along my jaw, making my eyes fly open.

"I want more. " My tone begging with no embarrassment.

A grin overtakes his lips, his eyes shining under the dim light of the moon. "I want you on your hands and knees. " He demands.

My body moves on its own, and before my mind can catch up I'm on all four, my ass on display in front of him. He runs his palms over the skin before slapping sharply my right ass-cheek.

I gasp, flinching forward. "That's for flirting with Rafe."

"I wasn't flirting with-" 

Another slap.

"And that's for ignoring me for a week." He growls. I stay silent as he pulls my underwear to the side again. He strokes my pussy with the head of his dick, dragging it up and down my slit, teasing me.

"JJ please," I whine desperately.

He leans down bringing his lips beside my ear. "Say you're sorry for ignoring me."

I swallow the last bit of pride that's left in me, understanding that my need for him is too big, and knowing that his ego is hurt, I do as he says. "I'm sorry for ignoring, I'm sorry."

"You want me?" He presses, his tone dripping with enjoyment.

"Yes, I want you so bad, please." I push my ass backwards.

He lets out a low chuckle and I hear him rip open a condom, seconds later his head presses against my entrance and slides in slowly. We both let out a groan at the feeling. God, I missed this too.

"Ready?" He asks breathlessly after a few seconds.

I nod my head, allowing him to move his hips. He grabs a full fist of my hair while his other hand stays on the curve of my ass before he pulls out and slams back in.

I immediately gasp when he begins to thrust inside me building a fast and steady rhythm.

"God, you're so fucking tight." He groans. The sound of skin on skin fills the air and my breaths begin to come out short as I arch my back. His dick feels too good inside me, almost heavenly. The way he moves, the sounds he makes, I've missed everything.

"Fuck it's so good." I brokenly moan. His balls begin to hit perfectly at my clit, pushing me closer and closer to my second orgasm. His grip on my hair tightens and pants of air mixed with low growls leave his mouth. I'm struggling to keep my body up as a fucks me harder than ever before and the fire in my belly grows.

"I'm not gonna last long." He mumbles in my ear but the pleasure between my legs is too much, my muscles burn and I squeeze my eyes shut as I let my second orgasm wash over me, euphoria spreading at every inch of my body. My legs begin to shake the sensation too intense as he fucks me through the last of it. His thrusts become sloppier, his nails digging into the flesh of my ass.

He falls forward and I feel his heartbeat on my back. "Fuck, Y/n." He lets an animistic growl in my ear, his body stilling completely as he empties himself inside the condom. Drops of sweat fall from the tips of his blonde hair on my shoulder, while both he and I catch out breaths. After almost a minute he plants a kiss on my back before pulling out slowly. The feeling of emptiness creeps in, alongside with the embarrassment and the realisation of what just happened. I hear him pulling the condom out and throwing it somewhere, while I stay almost frozen. Now that everything is done, I can't find the strength to face him. I lift myself to my feet, my legs still a little weak but I ignore it reaching for my shorts and putting them back on. I keep my back to him and my head low as reach for my top. The sound of his belt lets me know that he doing the same. I feel a tap on my shoulder and I turn around. He holds up my shirt between his fingers.

"Thanks." My voice falters. I pull the shirt over my head and run my fingers through my tangled hair. I feel his eyes on me, burning at the side of my head. I build up all the courage that I can master and turn my gaze to him and it takes one second to regrade it. He stands there, fully dressed, his blonde hair a mess, looking at me with those eyes. Those big, blue eyes that I've grown so used to over the last few months, staring at me with so much softness, analysing. Suddenly, my body is fighting a wave of emotions.

"What?" I ask, my tone almost a whisper.

He clenches and unclenches his jaw, his eyes saying so much but his mouth, not a single word. "I'm taking you home." He states before turning around and walking away back towards the party. I don't fight him, I simply follow him to his bike. Both of us know exactly what's going on, I know he understands what I'm trying to do but he doesn't seem to understand why and I don't bother explaining. I know him. I know how he is, I know how he reacts. I know who he is and who I am. I keep my hands tight around his waist as we make the short way towards my house on his bike. I try to enjoy these last few moments with him. It's always stolen moments like these. On his bike, on the beach, hidden in John B's van, silently in my room, or in my dad's boat. And that's not enough.

.

.

.

.

It's been days since I last saw him. He left me home, with a small nod and a goodnight and I haven't seen him since then. Truth be told, I haven't worked at the cafe at all, claiming to my mother that I have a lot of homework, which is partly true. I've been distracting myself as much as I can with school and studying. Tonight is no different, I'm sitting comfortably in my bed working on my homework for Monday.

"That's it, I'm done with this boy." My dad's yelling interrupts me, catching my attention.

"Honey please, he's going through a rough time." My mom tries to calm him down. "Let me talk to Y/n, maybe she knows something."

"She better not, she shouldn't be hanging out with these boys in the first place." I hear a door slam. I have heard my dad this angry in a long time, but usually, it is always about the same things; either me sneaking around and breaking his house rules or something to do with the pogues. My dad loves my mom and accepts her for who she is but he doesn't get why she still wants to have ties with the south side and most importantly why she wants me to grow up knowing both sides. But what are they fighting about now? What boy?

A soft knock on my door snaps me out of my thoughts. "Come in."

My mom opens the door slowly., entering my room. "Hey, honey." She closes the door behind her.

"What's going on mom? Why is dad yelling?" I ask her right away.

She lets out a sigh and approaches my bed, taking a seat. "Y/n have you talked to John B at all?"

My eyebrows twitch. "Um, no not really, why?"

She doesn't appear mad unlike the way my dad sounded a few seconds ago, instead, her face falls at my answer.  "Are you sure? Have you talked to Kiara or the other boys?"

I shake my head, her questions confusing me more. "No mum, why?"

"Apparently the keys to the boat are nowhere to be found." She finally explains.

"And you think Jonh B stole them?" I lift both my brows. "Mom, come on, I mean I would expect something like this from dad but not from you."

"No, no" My mom shakes her head, reaching for my hand. "No, honey. You know what I think of him, I care about John B, I've known him since he was a child. I wouldn't mind if he took the key and had fun on the boat with his friends for a few days but you know how your dad gets."

"It's always the pogues' fault." I roll my eyes.

"Please talk to him, " She nods. "I would hate for him to lose his job because of something like this. Just ask if he took them."

I nod back. "Fine, I will."

"Thanks, honey." She places a kiss on my forehead. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight mom." I hold my smile until she closes the door. Why would John B take the keys to our boat? He knows that if he simply asked me or my mom we would let him borrow it. This doesn't seem like something he would do but then again, the only people that have access to the boat are me, my parents, and him. I reach for my phone and call John B but the phone rings and rings with no answer. I try a few more times, before trying Kie and Pope, but no luck. I stare at his number for a few seconds before pressing call, mentally preparing myself to listen to his voice after so long but just like the rest of them, he doesn't pick up.

"What the hell? Why is none answering?" .

.

.

I decided to go by the chateau after my morning shift at the cafe. I prepare myself and go over the things I'll say if by chance JJ's there as well but I stop in my tracks when an unfamiliar van comes into view packed outside the house. Sounds of glass breaking, things being thrown around, and doors slamming can be heard as I move closer to the house. I push myself behind a big tree, narrowing my eyes, trying to peer through the open window, when 2 men come into view. Big, muscular, and scary looking. Fear begins to spread through my body.

"You better not be in there boy!" One of them yells as they both throw themselves to a closed door, trying to open it. They kick and punch at the old wooden door as it slowly begins to crumble. Suddenly I see the window on the side of the house opening, and a body quickly forcing its way out of it. He turns around and I immediately recognise Pope's face. Kie follows shortly after with John B right behind them. They begin to run my way as I stay frozen, completely shocked by what's happening right in front of me. Pope's eyes lock with mine, his face taken over by a scared expression probably mirroring mine.

"Guys." He yells in a whispering tone and everyone's heads snap my way. JJ is the last to jump out the window, running behind his friends.

His eyes fall on me, eyes widening. "No, no, no." He mumbles as they all reach me. "No, not now." He grabs my arm just when a gunshot echoes through the area. I gasp, my body numbing with fear as JJ drags me along with them, my eyes not leaving the house as the 2 guys open the door and burst into the room that they guys came out of. JJ pulls me inside the small chicken coop closing the small door behind us. I bring my hand to cover my mouth, my fingers trembling. I look around taking in all of their scared faces. "W-what-" I try to say.

"What are you doing here?" JJ angrily whispers, pulling me by the arm to face him but I don't react.

"JJ now is not the time." Kie snaps at him, fear written all over her face as well. The chickens begin to make noise, yet nothing reaches me. "Do something. " She nods towards the chickens.

"Like what? Pet them?" Pope jokes while trying not to panic.

JJ reaches over taking the chicken in his hands and squeezing his little neck until it eventually stops breathing. I try to take deep breaths but my eyes stay locked on the house as the men get inside the car and drive off. Kiara takes my hand in her, tears wetting her cheeks.

"I think it's clear." John B says. "Come on." He steps out of the coop, Pope and Kiara following him.

JJ moves in front of me, stepping out as well. He extends his hand for me to take. My trembling fingers wrap around it, allowing him to pull me out. 

"What are you here?" He repeats. His eyes look at me still panicked, moving around my face almost fanatically. His hands come up to my face, pushing hair away.

"I.." I try to form a sentence but my mouth is dry. "I was looking f-for John B."

"God." He runs his fingers through his hair, moving around.

"I thought we were going to die." Kie breathes out, holding her hand over her chest. Pope moves to her side and pulls her into a side hug.

"What just happened?" I say still trying to catch my own breath. "Who are they? What did they want?"

John B looks at his friends, and I know that he's silently asking them if he can tell me. He walks towards me. "Hey, I'm sorry you had to see that." He pulls me to his chest.

"Are you in trouble?" I look up at him. "you know that my mom will help you with anything. Just tell me."

"Y/n-"

"You don't have to know everything." JJ says, his hands crossed in front of him, his face suddenly cold.

I move my eyes to him, confused by his tone and sudden energy shift.

"JJ.." Kiara sends him a careful glare.

"Why were you looking for me?"

"Um," I mumble, my eyes still fixated on JJ. "did you take the keys to our boat?"

He closes his eyes, cursing under his breath. "Yeah," he looks at his friends again, all of them looking at me apologetically. What the hell is going on? I'm used to not being involved in pretty much anything when it comes to them, but this is not a joke.

I narrow my eyes at all of them, shaking my head. "Can anyone please explain to me what the fuck just happened?"

"Look Y/n-" Pope takes a step forward but JJ cuts him off, placing a hand on his chest.

"No, she doesn't need to know."

"What's wrong with you?" Anger overtakes my tone. He's acting like an asshole right now. "Do you realise what just happened JJ? Those guys had a gun."

"I know that Y/n." He clenches his jaw, walking back towards me. "but it doesn't involve you, so just go back to figure 8 cause last time I checked that's where you belong." He gets closer to my face and I feel my whole body stiffens at his cruel words. "Stop trying to be a pogue." 

I tighten the muscles on my face, not wanting to let the tears leave my eyes but the unexpected anger overtakes my body and my hand moves across his face, slapping him hard. His face freezes, staying to the right. He has never spoken to me like that. He has never acted this way towards me and I hate it.

"Fuck you dude." I spit, shaking my head. I turn to John B. "Give me the keys." I don't care why they took them and I don't wanna know what happened anymore, I just wanna go home.

"Y/n.." He gives an apologetic look.

"Give. me. the. keys." My tone is sharp as I open my palm in front of him.

He lets out a sigh before dropping them in my palm. I put them in my pocket, not saying a word to him, and turn around.

"Y/n, let me come with you." Kie offers.

"I'd rather not." I say getting inside my car and slamming the door shut. I pull out without waiting for any of them to try and stop me and drive off, letting the tears finally fall. Tears of fear, tears of anger, and tears of hurt. He was right; I desperately wanted to be one of them my whole life but that wasn't the reason why I asked. I don't give a shit what they were doing and how they ended up in a situation like that, but it was serious. It wasn't fun and games, those guys weren't joking around and I care about them. All of them. If they're in trouble I want to help them as much as I can. My mom would understand them and she would do anything to help cause she's a pogue. But I'm not. I'm not and they'll never see me as one. They'll never trust me enough. He'll never let me get close. I know how it is and I thought that I had accepted it but clearly I was wrong cause it hurts.

. . . .

It's been 2 days and yet I'm still on edge. I still look over my shoulder every 5 seconds, and I still flinch over any slightly loud noise. I've been zoning out constantly, my mind travelling back to that day and his words. It still hurts, the way he talked to me but it was the reality check that I needed. Maybe it's time to actually stop and move on.

I wipe the last of the tables getting ready to close the cafe. The sun is setting and I can't wait to go home and relax after a long day. I move to the counter, grabbing my stuff and making sure everything is closed and in order when I hear the 'ding' the door makes when it opens.

"I'm sorry we're closed-" I turn around coming face to face with the 2 men that broke into John B's house.

Their faces hold the same smug expression, satisfied with the clear shock that overtakes my whole body. "We're not here for coffee." One of them says, his voice raspy and low.

My feet move backwards until my back hits the front of the counter. "I-I can't help you then." I shutter.

"Oh but you can," He smirks. "you can deliver a message to John B for us."  I shake my head repeatedly, my chest heavy as I try to breathe. He grabs me by the arm, his fingertips digging painfully into my skin while the other finds my neck, choking me.

"And since words won't do it for them, maybe this will. "The other one says, nodding to his partner with a smirk. The guy releases me and before I have time to catch my breath, his hand slaps me across the face so hard that it sends me to the ground.

"Ugh." It takes me a few seconds for my sense to return, my head heavy with pain and my skin burning. He grabs me by the shirt, forcing me upwards only to bring his hand across my face again. I yell in pain, tears streaming down my face as the taste of blood fills my mouth. My eyes struggle to focus.

He stands straight, looking down at me. "P-Please stop." I beg but he stays unphased, kicking me right in the stomach. Pain spreads through my body, my knees coming to my chest as I cough violently. He kicks me again, and again, his boot finding my face at some point and I scream until there's no strength in me to make noise anymore. The tears won't stop and breathing gets harder by the second.

"Tell your friend that he better give us the compass or else he's next. "He pulls my head up by my hair causing me to whine in pain. He gives me one last evil smirk before slamming it back on the wooden floor and walking away without a second glance at my aching body, his partner following.

I sob violently at this point, trying to keep my head focused and my eyes open but they're getting heavier and heavier, the world starting to spin. I don't know how long I stayed on the floor in and out of consciousness but when I heard my name being yelled my eyes snapped open.

John B kneels by my side. "Oh my god Y/n, what happened?" He says, his voice full of panic. His hands' ghost over my body not knowing where to touch me as he scans the injuries.

I don't reply but a broken sob escapes me.

"It's okay, it's gonna be okay." He slides his hands carefully under my body, my face twitching with pain. He takes me in his arms and walks out of the cafe. "It's okay, you're safe, I got you." he murmurs against my head. He lays me down on the back seat of the twinkie before hopping in on the driver's seat. His hands move fast, his eyes wild, looking back at me every 2 seconds as he drives.

"What happened?" He whispers. "W-who did this?"

I keep my eyes close and try to control my breathing but the pain is too much. "T-those men" The words that leave my mouth are barely audible but he catches them.

His hands tighten around the wheel, before punching it. He looks back at me anger written all over his face, his eyes almost watering. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry Y/n. It's all my fault."

"The compass.." I drag out, causing him to look back at me with wide eyes but everything fades again.

I feel his hands on me again. He takes me in his arms. "We're here." He whispers and I bury my face in his neck. I recognise his house immediately. He takes big steps almost running trying to hold me without causing me pain.

He reaches the house. "Guys!." he yells. "Help!"

"Oh my god, Y/n," Kie cries out rushing to us.

"What happened?" Pope tries to help John B carry me to the couch.

"Y/n." It's his voice that makes my eyes finally open and it's the look on his face when he sees me that hurts more that the pain in my body. A single sharp breath leaves his mouth before he's by my side as John B places me on the couch. I let out a small whine.

"What happened?" He whispers, dropping to his knees beside me. "What happened?!" He yells turning to John B who has his hands buried in his hair, pacing around the room. Kie appears back in the room with a first aid kit.

"Those men, the 2 men that broke in, jumped on her. " He answers.

"What?" Pope says. "Why would they do that to her? How do they even know her?"

"It's the boat, idiots." Kie angrily says passing some ice to JJ. "They saw us jumping inside it to escape them."

"Baby," JJ presses the ice to my cheek, with trembling hands. I can already feel different parts of my body brushing. His other hand comes to my head, brushing my hair back. "Baby, I'm sorry." He places his lips against my forehead. His lips tremble, and he shakes his head, eyes wide full of fear and anger. "You're gonna be okay, I'm here yeah? I'm not leaving you again." He whispers, his voice breaking.

Kie appears next to us. "Jay, let me take care of her." She touches his shoulder. "She needs help and rest."

JJ leaves one last kiss on the side of my face before getting up. "I'm gonna fucking kill them."I hear him growl before he and the boys move further into the house. Kie cleans up all my wounds and takes care of the cuts that I had on my face.

"Get some rest okay?" She smiles a sad smile at me.

"Thanks, Kie." I mumbled before drifting off.

. . . . . .

I shiver, the sudden cold air that hits my exposed skin forces my eyes open, waking me up from my slumber. The living room is dark, not a single person is here except me. I try to lift my body into a seating position, and a sharp but lighter pain spreads around my stomach and back causing me to whine.

I hear a groan from my left and I turn to find JJ's sleeping body laying on the floor. His closed eyes twitch before opening. It takes a few seconds for him to react but when he sees me awake his body shoots up, hands stretching towards my body.

"Y/n," He breathes. "hey."

I rub my eyes with the back of my hands. "What time is it?"

"Um," His hands fumble with his phone. "It's almost 3 am. You fell asleep"

"Hmm," I hum, lifting myself into a seating position. "My parents-"

"Kiara texted them from your phone that you're gonna stay at hers tonight." He says. "Take it easy." He touches my back softly. A sad expression overtakes his face when he sees me struggling to straighten my back.

"Y/n.." He shakes his head and I know exactly what he's going to say.

"It's okay, it's fine." I reassure him. JJ tends to hold a lot of guilt inside. He thinks that he's responsible for anything that happens. It seems like he holds the weight of the world on his shoulders when there's really no need.

"No, it's not." He shakes his hand repeatedly. "It's not. I can't stand seeing you hurt because of me. You did nothing wrong, it shouldn't have happened like this." His eyes drop to his hands that are resting on my thighs.

"It's not your fault." I place my hand on top of his.

"But it is. We stole your boat to escape, they saw that. And then I acted like a dick refusing to tell you anything in order to protect you and keep you out of it when in the end it's you who got hurt." His voice is filled with guilt and anger.

"Protect me from what?" I scoff. "What's going on Jay?"

His eyes soften at the nickname but he stays quiet.

"Why don't you trust me?" I mumble, mostly to myself.

"I do trust you." He defends.

"Just not enough right?" I smile a little.

He closes his eyes. "Y/n, you know it's not like that. You know me."

"Apparently I don't JJ." I raise my tone a little. "I mean I thought I did, I wanted to. I was patient and I was understanding. I listened to you and I was there. As much as you would let me at least." I go on, and all the words that I was holding inside come rushing out. "The JJ I know would not talk to me like that, the JJ I know would not disappear for days, the JJ I know would not keep secrets from me."

"Y/n-" He tries to interrupt me.

"No, I get it, I know my place. " I hold a hand up between us. "I know we're not together but I care JJ. " I admit looking at him dead in the eye. His face falls at my words, jaw tightening. "I liked it when you would climb through my window and we would talk for hours about all the things you guys had done that day and I liked it when I would sneak out after midnight and go on bike rides with you. I liked how we would surf together or how we would lay on my rooftop, looking at the stars talking about all the things we want in life. You were the one that was pushing me to join you in all kinds of things, you would always tell me that I was a pogue deep down." Tears threaten to spill but I try to contain them.

"You were the one that pushed me away," He point a finger towards me. "Since day one, since the first day we fucked, you never wanted me."

"JJ," I lift my hands to my hair, struggling to control my anger. "I was trying to protect myself!"

"For what?" He shoots back, his frustration building as well.

"From you!" His shoulders fall. "I wanted you, I've always wanted you but I know you." I sigh, studying his beautiful, blue eyes that are piercing mine. "I know better than to let myself fall and believe that this is more than it is." I say quietly.

He tilts his head, his eyes never leaving mine. "I tried to stay away from you because I couldn't stand to hold you and know that you aren't mine. Every time I would look at your face, I would see nothing but walls. We would have sex and then you would go back to being cold and wanting to be as far away from me as possible and I honestly get it, people like me don't deserve people like you."

I shake my head in disbelief. "How can you say that?"

"Cause it's true." He chuckles sadly. "Look at you and look at me." He motions between us.

"Stop." I close my eyes, unable to stand the way he views himself, I wish he could see how extraordinary he actually is.

"Y/n, I know." His gaze hardens. "But when John B walked through that door with you almost unconscious in his arms. Your body and face brushed and beaten," He twitches his face as if the image brushes through his mind and physically hurts him. "I lost it. My heart dropped. Nothing mattered but making sure that you were okay and holding you in my arms. The thought that something like that had happened to you," He shakes his head, reaching to take my jaw in his hands gently. "I can't fucking stand it. And I swear to you that I will search the whole island for these motherfuckers and I'll fucking kill them for laying a finger on you." He leans forward, his forehead inches away from mine.

A small smile creeps on my lips at his words, my heart warming instantly.

"I'm sorry about what I said the other day, all I wanted was to protect you and I'm sorry for disappearing on you. I'm sorry about all the lying and the secrets and I'm sorry I can't be what you need and deserve." His eyes move all over my face while his thumbs move gently over my cheekbones.

I bite my lip. "JJ, you're all I want. You're more than enough." I say with my whole heart, wanting nothing more than for him to see himself the way I do. "You're the most incredible person I know and it hurts me that don't see it."

"I don't deserve you." He whispers, his lips ghosting over mine. His breath becomes my breath.

"Shut up." I smile crushing my lips to his. It doesn't take more than a second for him to react, moving his mouth against mine, inhaling sharply as if I'm oxygen. I let out a low moan as JJ's lips started nibbling at mine, demanding entrance that I'm all too happy to grant. It's ridiculous how much I've missed him, the taste of his lips is enough to make all the pain disappear. Everything fades away as our tongues collide, teasing and testing each other. My hands travel to his hair, tugging lightly while he holds my waist carefully. I push myself forwards, sucking on his bottom lip before capturing it between my teeth. I can feel him holding back, he digs his fingers into my skin and releases a sharp breath.

"Y/n," He lets out a low groan, breaking the kiss.

My frustration builds more with each second passing, wanting nothing more than to feel his hands on me. I need to feel him. "What?" I breathe out.

"Maybe.." His eyes fall to my swollen lips, his mouth opening. "Maybe we should take it slow, considering what you went through the last few hours."

I shake my head. "No, I want you." I inch forward wanting to taste him again but he doesn't let me.

"Princess, trust me I want nothing more than to throw you on the couch and fuck you senseless while you scream my name for everyone to hear." He tilts his head downwards, his words making my insides hot and causing my thighs to clench together, hoping for some relief. His eyes big and wild, hungrily staring back at mine while I let my hands explore and touch his face, brushing his hair back and down his neck. My burning desire for his touch has overtaken me completely, my stomach tightens just at the thought of all of the things we could do but I know that he's right, my body still feels beaten and heavy.

"You need to rest for tonight." He takes my jaw between his fingers.

"Will you stay with me?" I'm scared that the minute we leave each other, things will go back to how they were, and what I realised after tonight and after what happened is that I don't wanna be without him anymore. I don't want to be scared anymore cause you never know what will happen.

His face breaks into a soft smile. "Lay down."

His arms felt familiar yet foreign. Like I missed the feeling of falling asleep buried in his chest, his scent filling my senses but different like something's changed.

.

.

.

.

The book that I'm reading has been getting less and less interesting with each minute passing. Maybe it's the fact that it's 10:00 pm and I'm laying in my bed, reading on Saturday night, or the fact that he hasn't called me or even texted the whole day. It's been a few days since the incident at the cafe. After we woke up that day JJ drove me back home and explained pretty much everything, about The Royal Merchant, the compass that they found, and how it lead them to the tape recorder that Big John left for his son. I still can't believe some of the things that happened to them and what they discovered. He made me promise that I won't tell a soul, something I would have done even if he hadn't asked. I haven't seen him since, mostly cause my parents have been babying me none stop. I told them what happened at the cafe, twisted around a little the actual truth, and claimed that the 2 men tried to rob the cafe but JJ and John B showed up. I haven't gone to school or done anything in general for the past few days. I've been laying low and have recovered completely but my mind has been stuck on what JJ told me. Through the days I found myself wondering what they were doing and wishing I was with them.

A knock on my widow breaks me out of my thoughts. JJ sends me a small wave. My head snaps to my door, checking if it's closed before running to open the window. He quickly pushes his tall body through the small opening, stumbling a little in the process.

"Hi" he breathes out, standing up straight.

"Hi," I giggle "what are you doing here?" I scan him with my eyes making sure that he's okay and also taking in the sight of him that I've missed so much.

"I wanted to check up on you." He says, running his hands through his hair.

My hands are itching, wanted to reach in and touch him but I don't know if that is too much. Honestly, I don't know where we stand, all I know is that I've missed him.

His eyes move around my face while he tugs his bottom lip between his teeth. My eyes catch the movement. "Come here." He mutters before reaching forward and wrapping his arms around my waist. I bury my face into the curve of his neck, my eyes closing at the feeling of his embrace.

"I missed you." He speaks so quietly that I almost didn't catch it.

I tighten my arms around his neck, silently responding. I missed him too.

"I was worried about you." I say, pulling away slightly.

"About me?" He lifts his brows playfully. "Come on have a little faith in my survival skills princess."

I slap his shoulder lightly, trying to hide my smile. "What happened? Is everyone okay?"

"Yeah, everyone's fine." He brushes me off. "I'll tell you everything but first.." He cups my jaw with his hands and presses his lips to mine. I let out a surprised sound that dies in my throat before moving my lips against his, responding. I feel him smile into the kiss and he opens his mouth slightly, allowing my tongue to slide inside. He hums as our tongues play with each other, letting his hands fall to my waist. He pulls my body closer to his, forcing me to my tiptoes while the kiss gets heavier. The sound of our lips and our heavy breathing fills the room.

"My parents will hear us." I breathe out.

"I don't care." He attacks my lips again, backing me slowly until the back of my knees hit my bed. He breaks the kiss and gives me a light push causing me to fall on the bed. He stares down at me with a smirk slowly dropping his hands to the bottom of his shirt and peeling it off his body. My eyes take him in, his chest and abs on full display. I bite my lip wanting nothing more than to reach out and touch him. He leans down, wrapping his hands around my neck, forcing my head upwards to look at him.

"Don't look at me like that." He drawls out.

I relax my face, staring at him through my lashes. "Like what?"

He pushes me down completely, my back flat against the bed while his legs are spread on each side of my hips.

He gives me a light slap on the cheek but it's enough to make my back arch and my thighs to clench together. "Don't test me, princess, 'cause I don't give a shit about your parents being just across the hall."

My hands find the bottom of my own shirt, pulling it over my head. "I don't give a shit either."

"Fuck." He dives right into my chest, his mouth nibbling and sucking on my exposed skin. My hands go to his hair instantly, guiding him to my breasts. He wastes no time, unclipping my bra and taking one of my nipples in his mouth.

"Mhh," I moan as he circles his tongue around the hardening nub. His hands hold my hips down when I try to find some relief by grinding my hips to his. His lips travel farther down teasingly, dragging his tongue over my stomach and stopping at the top of my pajama pants. His eyes shoot up, the light and hunger in them challenging me. His fingers toy with the fabric, pulling it down slowly, not breaking eye contact while I lift my hips, allowing him to fully take it off. He straightens up, his hands fumbling with his belt with his eyes glued to my panties. His breathing hardens when I open my thighs exposing myself to him.

"You have no idea how I missed you." He groans, pulling his pants down.

I blink at him with a small smile. "How much?"

His eyes darken, looking down at my figure hard. " Let me show you." He pulls me by the thighs to the edge of the bed and kneels down right in front of my core. I inhaled sharply as he wastes no time ripping my panties off of me. His eyes beamed with hunger, taking in the sight of me. He lowers himself just a little, his hot breath fanning my bare pussy causing shivers to spread through my body. He looks up, eyes narrowing playfully using the tip of his tongue to deliver a soft flick over my clit. My legs twitch slightly, which causes him to smile.

"Stay still princess." He pins my hips down again and drags his tongue over my slit. He groans against me, the vibration shooting through me while he wastes no time diving in and moving his tongue at a faster pace. Heat explodes through my veins, my toes curling at the feeling of his wet muscle absolutely devouring me with no hesitation. He sucks and nibbles, drawing and flickering against my sensitive nerves as I whimper shamelessly underneath him. My hand shoots to his hair, head falling back and my back arching when I feel not one but two fingers slotting into my entrance.

"Oh my god, Jay." I rasp out, my palm covering my mouth.

His fingers start moving violently fast inside me, filling the room with pornographic wet sounds as the heat on my lower stomach builds embarrassingly fast. "Fuck baby, you're so wet." He groans against me before moving his thumb to cover my clit, rubbing circles in a fast motion.

His mouth attaches to my neck, taking the soft skin between his lips. "I want you to come on my fingers baby can you do that for me?" He whispers in my ear.

My body lifts off the mattress, feeling myself climbing higher and higher. "I-I'm gonna-" The words die in my throat as a giant wave of unexpected pleasure crashes over me, my eyes roll all the way back to my head, my mind going completely numb as his fingers keep up the pace allowing me to ride it out.

"That's it, baby," He mumbles against my neck. I close my eyes, still feeling the tingling sensation lingering in my belly. He pulls his fingers out, the aftermath of my orgasm dripping to his palm. He wraps his swollen lips around them, testing me while piercing me with his blue eyes.

He moans lightly. "The taste of you is incredible."

"Can I have a taste?" I nod down to his visibly hard member, that's fighting against the fabric of his boxers as he straightens his back, towering over me. My mouth watering at the thought, hands inching to fill the weight of his throbbing cock against them.

A low chuckle escapes him. "I would die to feel those pretty lips around my dick," He takes my jaw between his fingers. "But there's something I want more right now." He captures his bottom lip between his teeth, reaching to pull his boxers down. His dick shoots up free hitting his stomach, my eyes flicker to the tip, red and swollen with drops of precum coating it already. He pulls the drawer of my nightstand open, grabs a condom from the ones that he left a few weeks back, and quickly rolls it over his dick. He takes both of my wrists in his hands before I have any time to touch him and slams me back down on the bed.

He pins my hands over my head. "Your hands stay there."

I nod, trying to stop the grin of excitement that's forming on my lips. The feeling of need and frustration that only he can make me feel and that I've missed so much overtakes me as he lines his dick in my entrance. His tip brushes over my clit, opening my folds before pushing in slowly.  His forehead falls on mine and we both gasp as he fills me up entirely.

"Shit, princess." He hisses when I nod my head and give him the green light to move which he wastes no time doing. He pulls out all the way before slamming back in, filling me up again with such a powerful push that it causes me to gasp out loud. His hips find a rhythm in no time, attacking me with sharp, deep thrusts that make my breasts bounce almost painfully. His forceful movements draw all kinds of sounds out of me while everything begins to fade. My ears fill with the sound of my own heartbeat and his low moans and grunts as he pushes in and out of me, stretching me out with the size of his cock. I fight to keep my eyes open, only being able to focus on his beautiful face, that's overtaken by a mesmerizing fucked out expression. His eyebrows are drawn together, drops of sweat coating his forehead while his mouth hangs slightly open. He looks breathtaking as he fucks me senseless, reminding me with each thrust that in reality, he's all I want. His hands reach for the back of my right thigh, lifting it a little gaining access to a better angle that allows him to thrust deeper. My eyes roll back, unable to contain the pleasure that shoots from my core, my hands fly to his back, nails dining to the soft flesh, earning a deep grunt from him.

"You're doing so well baby, look at you taking my dick like a good girl." He grabs my neck with his free hands, his pace quickening making the knot in my stomach tighten. I dig my nails deeper, hands tugging his hair while both of our bodies dripping with sweat but I don't care about anything except my second orgasm that approaches.

"Are you gonna come for me again princess?" He teases me, feeling my walls tighten against him. "Tell me how good it feels, and maybe I'll let you come." He demands, tilting his head downwards and tightening his grip around my neck.

I can feel my wall throbbing, tightening painfully around his dick trying to keep him inside as heat begins to spread in my belly. "It feels so good Jay, so fucking good please baby don't stop." My dignity dissolves as tears start to form at the corners of my eyes.

"Tell me I'm the only one you want." His thrusts being to get sloppy, signalling that his own high is approaching. His eyes are wild, and everything starts to feel overwhelming.

"Y-you're the only one, I only want you." I confess, my tone desperate and begging.

He connects our foreheads again, hand dropping to my clit and with a single flick of his finger, I'm over the edge. My back arches, black spots fill my vision, and an almost euphoric feeling pulses through my veins. My brain and body are overtaken with pleasure and I keep my eyes shut as JJ's orgasm hits him just as hard.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." He buries his face in the curve of my neck, letting his low groans fill my ear. I let him ride it out, ignoring the over-sensitivity that I start to feel. His body freezes for a few seconds as he releases into the condom before collapsing on top of me. I feel his heart drumming in his chest while he tries to control his breathing. I'm still in a state of bliss, ears still ringing and heart still beating fast. We stay like this for a good minute, our sweaty bodies touching and our fast breathing filling the air until he decides to lift himself off me and fall to the side.

Silence overtakes us, letting everything that just happened sink in. He pops himself on his elbow, head resting on his hand as he looks down at me with soft eyes. His hair going in every possible direction, his lips swollen and his neck covered in marks I don't remember making.

I smile at the sight of him.

"What?" His breathing is still uneven.

"You're pretty." I think out loud.

His eyes shift, lips curving upwards. "I love you, Y/n."

The raw emotion is visible as he speaks the words, causing my heart to stop for a split second. The words I desperately wanted to hear and desperately wanted to say for so long. The skin of my cheeks tingled but I say nothing, still processing what he just said.

His face breaks into a smile, unphased by my silence. "Fuck, I wanted to say that for so long." He lets out a breath of relief, pushing his hair back.

I've dreamt about this moment, never actually believing that it'll happen, thinking that just a hookup was all that I would ever be for JJ.

I stare deep into his ocean eyes. "I love you too JJ." I speak the easiest truth I've ever had to say out loud.

His smile grows more, overtaking his whole face and causing his eyes to almost close. I reach over throwing a hand around his neck and kissing him like I've never had before. We both smile into the kiss and giggles fill the air.

"I'm in love with you." He says again, against my lips.

His phone interrupts our moment before I have the chance to say it back again.

He sighs, reaching towards the floor to retrieve it from the pocket of his pants.

"What?" He picks up, keeping his eyes on me. His face drops, eyebrows coming together. "Slow down, slow down." His gaze shifts and I lift myself to a seating position, quickly throwing my shirt on. "Okay, I'm coming got it." His body almost bounces as he paces back and forth, his free hand moving fanatically until he stops right in front of me, ending the call.

His eyes light up and a challenging smile tugs at his lips.

"What?" I ask, completely lost.

"Wanna join me on a treasure hunt princess?" He grins.

"What do you mean?" My face twitches with confusion.

"John B needs me, they found something." He begins to get dressed.

"And what? You want me to join you guys?" I can't help the excitement that spreads over my face. "What do you mean?"

"The guys are waiting for us at Kie's place." He stands up straight, all dressed and ready with his hands resting on his hips. "That's the reason I came here." He bites his bottom lip, trying to contain his smile. "To get you. They guys are okay with it, especially with everything happening with Sarah and John B. " He waves his hands around.

I frown." What's going on with Sara and John B?"

He shakes his head, reaching for my waist. "I'll explain on the way. Are you in or not?"

I look into his eyes, the deepest shade of blue I've ever seen. The eyes that I've fallen so hard for and I would do anything for. The eyes that are now silently inviting me, challenging me, and making my heart beat faster. All my life I wanted nothing more than to be like them, to feel what it's like to live life their way, and even though what happened was the scariest thing I've ever experienced I can't help but give him a small nod.

His teeth make an appearance before he takes my face in his hands, planting a kiss on my lips. "Get dressed then baby, the gold is waiting." He smirks.

I smile against his lips. I guess my mom was right; the choice is pretty easy if you follow your heart.

[gurugirl]

I love stepdad Harry! Always brings a smile to my face when i see youve posted (guilty pleasure yum). Thank you for the last one!

but i cannot get enough of stepmom reader. You’ve made that one into something really special. In fact I told someone about it last week and they were like ~ nope. Not into stepmom stuff or older yn. Nope ~

but then guess what? they wound up reading it and binged all three parts and admitted to me that they were wrong 😂 I’m like ‘yeah I know’

just wanted to share that with you! Your stepmom fic is so shockingly good (not shocking bc you’re not a good writer, shocking bc it’s a trope most of us were not interested in) that it’s quickly become my top 5 all time favorite.

i cannot wait for part 4! I adore them and you so much. Do you have any idea when part 4 will come out? Any sneaky???

ps.. sorry for the weird capitalization stuff going on there. My phone decided when to capitalize randomly and I’m too lazy to fix.

A Good Boy sneak peek under the cut below!

🥹 thank you so much, babe. Really glad you liked the stepdad!harry from yesterday! That was a quick little fun thing to write.

As for stepmom!reader - wow! I really love that you're liking it so much and talking about it with other people and that your friend changed their mind 😂 Seems to be the theme for that fic. So many of y'all didn't think you'd like it based on the trope alone but I'm surprised that you guys did enjoy it anyway! Makes me smile.

So, I'm almost done with part 4. I think I can have it out by Thursday? Maybe? I'm super busy today (well, busy for me LOL) and gonna try to write but I've also got something I'm working on that someone paid me to write so I'm prioritizing that. Thursday at the earliest I'll post part 4 but I'll let y'all know.

And the random capitalization? My phone does the same. 😂 The words can't, can, and don't often get capitalized in the middle of sentences and it's a crapshoot on when the beginning of a sentence will be capitalized or not. I need to turn it off so it just leaves everything lowercase. So no judgement from me!

Sneak peek below !! (just remember this is literally copied from the word doc I'm writing in and hasn't been proofread or edited so some changed may be made before I post part 4)

Y/n was wearing her newly altered peach silk dress. The alterations were simple. The straps and hem were adjusted and the back column was dropped down a bit to drape to her low back. Her strappy nude heels were well-worn but comfortable because she was just simply not in the mood to wear the stiff, new heels she’d just bought.

The estate of Rebecca Manera was impressive. Probably equally as impressive as Leonardo Styles’. Most of the guests had already arrived by the time the Styles’ walked through the front door a little late.

Leo scolded Y/n for taking so long to get ready and making them run behind but in all honesty, she didn’t give a fuck. They could be half an hour late. No one would care. Why rush to go to a party? It’s not like they needed to clock in and earn a paycheck.

“It’s rude, Y/n. That’s why it matters. You’re so goddamn rude sometimes. You only think about yourself.”

She turned sharply to look at her husband in shock. That was the first time he’d ever said such a thing to her. Normally he had no opinion on how she conducted herself. She was chronically late. Yes, she could admit that was a flaw in her character but she was on time when it really counted. But to get so worked up over a party? And to insult her on top of it?

That had set the whole mood for the night. And now she was even more suspicious about this Rebecca.

But when Rebecca did make her appearance and introduced herself to Y/n she was taken aback. The woman had to be in her 50s. She was pretty, sure, but not quite Leo’s type. If Y/n were any sort of indicator of a type.

Servers walked around with trays and served the couples in attendance. There were only ten couples there as well as Rebecca’s two daughters, Y/n learned. Quite the intimate affair really.

Leo brought a glass of wine to Y/n as she chatted with Mrs. Topman (she never learned her first name, as the woman literally introduced herself as Mrs. Topman).

“Here you are darling.” His green eyes shined down at her before searching the room casually. She was on to Leo. But she found it odd that the woman he was with in the Hamptons was Rebecca. She was intrigued.

She watched Rebecca mingle and sip wine and laugh and there was nothing there that made Y/n think Leo would be interested in her sexually. But maybe that was it, Y/n thought to herself as she cocked her head to the side watching the woman speak boisterously. Maybe it wasn’t sexual. Maybe it was a woman he felt a deeper connection with than he did with Y/n. Perhaps it hadn’t started sexual but led there.

The snack table was set up with decadent treats. Y/n picked up a toast smeared with something pink, topped with heart-shaped tomatoes on top as she scanned the room for Leo, wondering where he’d gone off to. It hadn’t been that long but knowing about Rebecca being with him made things feel like she was in some kind of true crime detective story and was trying to get to the bottom of a mystery. Though there was no crime being committed, she could entertain herself with that thought.

“Are you enjoying your time tonight?”

Y/n turned her sight to Rebecca who was next to her picking up the same toast with pink schmear.

“It’s amazing. Your home is so lovely, Mrs. Manera,” she smiled and noted the woman’s massive diamond ring in addition to her massive diamond wedding ring.

“Why thank you. Phineas has put in so much work to make this large shell into a lovely cozy home.”

Y/n nearly spat her bite out. The home was anything but cozy.

“It’s incredible. Where is Mr. Manera tonight?”

“Oh, just over there,” she pointed to a man in tweed with thick black-framed glasses, “You haven’t met yet?”

Rebecca led the way as Y/n walked in her wake to meet Mr. Manera. She had still not spotted her own husband.

“Phineas, dear, this is Mrs. Styles. Leonardo’s wife.”

The man held his hand out, “Very nice to meet you, Mrs. Styles.”

“Likewise. You can call me Y/n.”

 “Well, Y/n. We’re happy to have you here. Where’s Leo anyway? Haven’t seen him.”

Turning around quickly to look over her shoulder she shrugged and faced the man and his wife again, “Not sure actually. I haven’t seen him in a bit myself,” she laughed. And before she could even think about what she was implying she spoke to Rebecca, “But I’m sure you’ve seen enough of him since you saw him in the Hampton’s this weekend.”

Rebecca and Phineas’ smiles dropped as they looked at one another and then back to Y/n, “I haven’t been to the Hamptons in over a decade. Are you sure you’re not mistaking me for Parker? Our daughter? She was just there all weekend with her girlfriends.”

A Good Boy Masterlist

A Good Boy tags: @becauseheartsgetbroken-hs @shishcabobsworld @daphnesutton @spinnerswife69 @holy-macncheese-balls @cookielovesbook-akie @lilfreakjez @itsgigikay @amateurduck

[hauntedwitch04]

The loneliest

Bassist!Remus Lupin x Writer!Reader

Words: about 1.4k words

Warnings: none, just sad

Author's note: hi loves! here for you another bassit!remus lupin, this time a sad one. I had this idea bit ago, and I wrote it down in the drafts and today I said "why not?". As already said, I'm a superfan of Maneskin so here I am with another one of their song!

My first idea

Hope you like it!

Requests are open I Ask

My masterlist

Join the Taglist

Love is the cruelest curse that has ever been inflicted on humanity.

This is all I managed to write on my computer, while wrapped in about 20 blankets on my friend's couch. It has been months since I had to start writing my new novel, and of course I had to start now, after breaking up with my boyfriend, or rather with the love of my life.

I haven't been able to stop crying for days, the tears seem to have become part of my face as I stare at that blank screen.

Susy told me to let it go and think about recovering instead of thinking about the book, but this is the only thing that can distract me from the pain.

We have never quarreled like this in all the years we have been together. Every fight between us, no matter how small it was, but this time it really destroyed me.

It had all started with the fact that he hadn't spent the night at home for weeks now, every night out with his friends for events or for fun, and I couldn't help but be happy for him, but I felt in all this a bit neglected. When he was home he was always busy in his study or on the phone, and he never had a second to talk to me. In the evening we would have dinner in silence, and when he finished eating he would go immediately to another room, in case he was home and had not already gone out. After a long time I couldn't stand this anymore so I made up my mind to talk to him, but at that time he was at the studios of the record company. Once I got there I went to wait for him in his studio after greeting the other members of the Maraurders band: James, the drummer; Sirius, the singer; Regulus, the guitarist.

I waited a few minutes in the room, looking at that space so large and so charged with the 'essence of Remus at the same time, until my gaze fell on the small sofa in front of the window, or rather what was on the small sofa. I moved closer and realized that the colorful object that had attracted my attention from afar was a pair of red lace panties.

I remember how the air went out of me and tears came to my eyes, and before I could realize it I slumped to the floor. I don't remember the door opening, but I remember Remus's gaze, his eyes wide with astonishment and his running toward me. He was talking but I couldn't hear him; it was as if I were underwater and my ears were plugged.

Then I remember my screams, everything I had held in until that moment, and like a wave I had let my anger crash against him. Remus was trying to explain, to speak, but I was not giving him time, and before I could understand what my mouth was saying I had told him I did not want to see him again. I regained my senses from that empty feeling once in the car, where I screamed so loud that my throat hurt. After that I went home, got some of my things, and went to Susy's, looking for a safe haven. For days my fiancé had tried to contact me, or my manager or my friends, but never had anyone responded to him.

Love is a double-edged sword because you can get hurt when you love too much and when you love too little. The love I have for Remus is an eternal love, which no matter how bad it has made me feel will not cease to exist, because every cell in my body loves and desires him and for that I hate myself.

My thoughts are interrupted by the ringing of my cell phone, and I realize that my manager has sent me an e-mail. I open it and read it.

"This footage is from yesterday. Look at it. I love you. Mary"

That's all it says with a link attached. Immediately I open it and realize that it is a video of the last Marauders concert, and I am immediately ready to close it, when my eye falls on Remus. I've never seen him look so bad. He has dark circles under his eyes and a pale face. His eyes are dull as he looks out at the crowd and plays bass. When the song is over, Sirius asks the crowd for silence.

"Please be quiet. For the first time in my life, I find myself getting serious. Usually I'm the one messing around with girls, or boys, but apparently this time Remus has broken my record. The poor guy is devastated, and I can't help but feel guilty, because it's my fault. Y/N, if you ever see this video, I'm sorry for what happened, for all the misunderstanding, and please listen to poor Moony, we can't stand to see him so miserable anymore." He says walking across the stage, and looking at the camera, as I see Remus move to the center of the stage in front of the microphone.

"For example, you could start listening to him from this song that his poor broken heart wrote entirely for you." Sirius continues before remaining silent and giving his friend space.

You'll be the saddest part of me

A part of me that will never be mine

It's obvious

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

You're still the oxygen I breathe

I see your face when I close my eyes

It's torturous

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

There's a few lines that I have written.

In case of death, that's what I want, that's what I want

So don't be sad when I'll be gone

There's just one thing I hope you know, I loved you so

'Cause I don't even care about the time I've got left here

The only thing I know now is that I wanna spend it

With you, with you nobody else here

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

You'll be the saddest part of me

A part of me that will never be mine

It's obvious

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

You're still the oxygen I breathe

I see your face when I close my eyes

It's torturous

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

I'm sorry but I gotta go

If you'll ever miss me give this song another go

And I just keep on thinking how you made me feel better

And all the crazy little things that we did together

In the end, in the end, it doesn't matter

If tonight is gonna be the loneliest

You'll be the saddest part of me

A part of me that will never be mine

It's obvious

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

You're still the oxygen I breathe

I see your face when I close my eyes

It's torturous

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

You'll be the saddest part of me

A part of me that will never be mine

It's obvious

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

You'll be the saddest part of me

A part of me that will never be mine

It's obvious

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

You're still the oxygen I breathe

I see your face when I close my eyes

It's torturous

Tonight is gonna be the loneliest

Remus' low, deep voice enchants me, and I feel tears flowing overbearingly down my cheeks. I listen to every second of that song, eagerly, holding each word close to my heart, imprinting them on my soul.

Without thinking about it I put everything to the side and run to the door with the intention of going to him and apologizing, but I am met with a scene I never expected. Remus is sitting with his head between his legs in front of the door, a bouquet of flowers abandoned at his side. Upon hearing the door open he turns and looks at me. He opens his mouth but makes no sound. His face is marked with tears as much as mine and I cannot resist. I throw myself into his arms, holding him tightly as I never have. He returns that gesture and strokes my hair. I begin to cry again as I ask him a thousand times to apologize, and he replies that he is the one who needs to apologize. We don't do anything else, we just stand there embracing, finding ourselves, and I realize that yes love is the greatest curse ever cast on human beings, but also the greatest blessing, because without suffering we would never experience such a strong and beautiful feeling.

[torreshalstead]

On a crowded street in 1944 - Chapter 7

Summary - The four walls of Upton’s General Store were all Hailey knew although she longed to see what else life had to offer. When a handsome soldier walks through the door, she thinks he might just be the answer to the life she wants to have. But it was 1944 and the country was at war. Would fate smile on her or would her heart be another casualty of the war?

Chapters - 7/15

Notes - Fun fact about the inspiration for this story, it actually came from a misheard lyric and this chapter is where that comes into effect. Happy Reading ❤️ AO3 Link

My Beautiful Hailey,

I cannot thank you enough for sending me your picture, it has been close to my heart from the moment it arrived, that is when I am not staring at it. It might sound creepy and I apologise but getting to see your beautiful face again is what is getting me through these long days. We haven’t been blessed with good weather, let us just say that.

Even if I could send you a picture I’m not sure you’d like to see it right now, I am usually covered in mud so please remember me as I was in Chicago. That is how I will look when I come back to you.

I hope you know that when I return, I intend to ask you to be my wife. I do not have much to give but I have my love for you and I hope that will be enough.

I miss you more with each day that passes.

Your love,

Jay

Hailey cried more over this letter than she had at any of its predecessors. He wanted to marry her. She had let herself dream it, hope it, even prayed for it. But he had told her that he wanted her to be his wife. When she closed her eyes that night, her dreams were filled with visions of her in white, arm in arm with Jay - she slept better that night than she had done for weeks.

——————————————————————————

‘Hailey!’ Her father barked loudly the following afternoon when he strolled into the shop. It had been a quiet day which Hailey was thankful for. Her mind was too preoccupied with the contents of Jay’s last letter to deal with too many customer queries today.

‘Yes father,’ she said calmly, knowing that if he was already hooting and hollering, it was best not to get him anymore riled up.

‘Make sure you close up on time today, we’re going out for dinner,’ he said as if he normally made such outlandish suggestions. Hailey couldn’t even recall the last time they had gone out for dinner. It wasn’t something the Upton’s did. Her father always called it a waste of money and a waste of her mothers talent. Which was kind but Hailey knew the former was far more important than the latter. And as much as she tried, Eugenia Upton’s talents in the kitchen still left something to be desired.

‘Out for dinner?’ She questioned, eyes wide.

‘Are you deaf, that’s what I said. We are leaving here as soon as you’ve closed up,’ he said and then with another look up and down at her current attire he added, ‘well once you’ve changed. There’s a stain on your skirt. And do your hair that prissy way you did it the other day. But quickly.’ And with that, he turned heel and stomped up the stairs leaving her alone to ponder what had just happened.

It was unlike her father to ever pay attention to what she was wearing, let alone what she was doing with her hair. He only cared that the store opened and closed on time and a profit was made. Something was off but Hailey had no idea what.

Maybe it was for her birthday, she had turned 18 a couple of weeks ago, but surely if he had wanted to do something for that, it would have been on the day of. He knew when her birthday was, he had wished her a lovely day before he had hurried out the door. It wasn’t the biggest of birthday celebrations but her family had never been one for big celebrations, no fuss was her fathers motto. Unless it was a fuss that was going to get the store and by extension him, good publicity. But surely going out for dinner wasn’t going to do that.

She sighed as she glanced at the clock, still an hour until closing time. An hour to spend considering various scenarios that would make Mr Upton spend his hard earned money on a meal out when they had groceries upstairs. As much as the opportunity to eat at a restaurant would be nice, lovely even, she had plans for the evening. Well her plan was to read Jay’s letter a few more times until she had it completely memorised and then read it again for good measure. She guessed she could always read it when she came home. Hailey was certain they wouldn’t be out late, not when there were new customers to be served the following morning.

Her father didn’t say where they were going but she hoped it was the Italian restaurant at the end of the street. She had often looked in the windows on her walks and seen the neat white table cloths, the lit candles and the plates of pasta and tomato sauce. It always looked the most lovely of places but with her fathers hatred of restaurants, she had never thought she’d get the chance to eat there. And heaven knows she didn’t earn enough to be able to take herself out to a place like that. And it wasn’t done, women didn’t dine alone in public, even the elderly spinsters ate in their own houses unless accompanied by friends or relatives.

But by the sound of what her father was saying, that she should do her hair and wear a dress without stains, not that she had many, maybe her luck was about to be changing.

——————————————————————————

‘Hailey, are you ready yet?’ Her mother asked softly as she knocked and pushed open the door to Hailey’s room. Thankfully, the letter she had been rereading had already been safely tucked under her pillow ready for one more read through before bed. Maybe it was too much, maybe Jay would think she was crazy for reading his words over and over again. But by the tones of his letters, the careful words he put on a page and the wonderful things he said, Hailey didn’t think so.

‘I am,’ Hailey said with a smile, flattening down the front of her pastel yellow dress. It was a little tighter around the chest than it had been since the last time she had worn it but it was stain free as requested. She could have worn the blue dress from her first date with Jay, that was also stain free and wasn’t quite so taunt across her chest but she was sentimental. That dress was special and she wanted to save it, she’d wear it again when Jay came home and she could run into his arms.

‘You look lovely dear,’ her mother said but there was something in her tone that Hailey couldn’t quite place. She was looking at her with tears in her eyes. Hailey knew her mother was more emotional than most but this seemed like something else.

‘Mother-’ she started but before she could ask if she was okay her father stamped down the hall and barked that it was time to leave. Her mother took a deep breath and the moment was over.

Hailey bowed her head a little and obediently followed her mother and father down the stairs and out onto the street.

She still didn’t know where they were going or the purpose of today’s excursion but as they approached Guillio’s and her father stopped to open the door, her stomach rumbled excitedly. She could practically hear the spaghetti calling her name.

‘Table for Upton,’ her father said to the greeter standing just inside the door.

‘Welcome Sir,’ he responded, checking the book in front of him before nodding to a waiter behind him. ‘The rest of your party has already arrived, we shall show you to your table.’

The rest of your party - Hailey was even more confused than she had been when the dinner was initially mentioned. The Upton’s didn’t have any friends, no one they would want to go out for dinner with. She wanted to ask her father what was going on but she could see that his skin had prickled when they got told they were as good as late. Being late was not something he abided by.

She followed closely behind her mother as they were led to a large table towards the back of the room. The table was already occupied by three individuals, without introductions she assumed it was two parents and a son, who looked to be a few years older than her. He was rather plain looking, brown mousy hair and just as dull eyes. Nothing like the emerald orbs that filled her dreams. He was smiling politely at her so she worried she had judged him too quickly. His father, if that was who the older gentleman was, was far smarter dressed than her own father. His brown suit freshly pressed, beard neatly trimmed and Hailey was sure if she took a look at his nails they would be free of grime. Such hands had never seen a day's manual labour in their life.

The woman at the table was just as mousey looking as her assumed son, although she was wearing a frock that Hailey guessed cost more than all of her own clothes combined. Her expression was unsure, not unlike her own mothers. It would appear that the husbands had not had the forefront to provide either wife with any additional information prior to their meeting.

‘Ivan, good to see you,’ the man said, standing up with a hand outstretched which her father accepted and shook before gesturing towards Hailey and her mother.

‘May I introduce my wife Eugenia and my daughter Hailey,’ the brown suited man nodded at them in return. ‘This is Mr Farrell.’ That was clearly all the information they were getting and neither Hailey or her mother were offered an outstretched hand or the opportunity to speak.

‘Pleasure,’ he said, although his eyes were darker now with not a hint of the pleasure he mentioned. ‘My own wife Angelica and son, Oscar Farrell the third.’

Hailey thought it peculiar that he full-named his son but didn’t so much as look at his wife, purely gesturing behind him absentmindedly. It was as if Ivan hadn’t introduced his own family, he wouldn’t have felt the need to do so.

‘Apologies for our tardiness, Hailey here was taking far too long to do her hair,’ her father said and Hailey didn’t fail to notice she had been blamed for the lateness even though the Upton’s had left their residency with plenty of time to get to the establishment. The Farrell’s were simply early.

‘Well, she has such lovely hair,’ Hailey’s mother said quickly in her defence but Hailey wished she hadn’t when she saw the look her father shot her.

‘Yes,’ Mr Farrell said, looking over at Hailey who felt like she shouldn’t have worn such a tight dress with the way his eyes were roaming over here. She pulled her shawl a little closer over here like a safety blanket. ‘Lovely hair,’ he sneered.

With the pleasantries, if you could call them that, over, Hailey’s father took a seat next to Mr Farrell, who by his introduction of his son Hailey assumed was also called Oscar. Her mother sat next to her which was opposite Mrs Farrell which left Hailey at the end of the table next to Oscar.

From what Hailey could hear of her father’s conversation, it appeared to be that he knew Mr Farrell from a business arrangement. She let her mind wander, the inner working of their shop and the attached businesses and suppliers were of little interest to her. The day she no longer had to work in the shop would be a great day indeed.

She felt a nudge to her shoulder and turned to her mother who in turn gestured to the younger Oscar, it would appear her daydream had led to her ignoring something he had said.

‘Sorry Oscar,’ she said with a forced smile. ‘What were you saying?’

‘I was just asking what you like to do in your spare time Miss Upton,’ he asked, straightening his tie with unease.

They were going by titles, that was proper she supposed.

‘I like to read Mr Farrell,’ she said but she could tell immediately that wasn’t the answer he was looking for.

‘Read? But you’ve finished your studies no?’ He asked, as if a woman had no business reading for pleasure. Something her father also agreed with.

‘I have,’ she said, forcing a smile back on her face. ‘I read for pleasure,’ she said but with another small kick under the table from her mother she added, ‘I also like to help Mother with the housework, cooking, cleaning, mending clothes and the like.’

That was a lie, although she did all of those things, she didn’t like them. She tolerated it because she loved her mother and things needed to be done. But she got her joy from reading, although her joy at the moment wasn’t in reading printed novels but in the handwritten letters from her love.

‘Lovely,’ he said and Hailey nodded kindly. He then began telling her all about the fishing he liked to undertake in his own spare time, which he assured her there was little of with all the hard work that went into running Farrell Industries.

The rest of the evening continued in much the same manner, with the men talking and the women listening. Hailey was used to evenings where she didn’t converse, rather was talked at. It was the same in her own home, unless it was just her and her mother, her father steered the conversation topic and only left enough space for his wife to say yes dear or no dear at the correct moments.

At least the food was good, Hailey thought to herself. There had been no beef for the meatballs, the pressure of the war had caused a lack of meat for most restaurants but her spaghetti and tomato sauce had been one of the best things she had ever eaten. Her father had grumbled when he had ordered the steak - a funny thing to order at an Italian restaurant Hailey thought, but the waiter had apologised profusely and offered a complimentary bottle of wine for the kitchen’s lack of the option and that seemed to appease him.

There was a big to do about who was paying the bill which her father won and handed over a stack of notes to cover the cost of the dinner. Hailey had never seen Ivan Upton hand over money for anything before without trying to get the price down. But she imagined whatever the reason for this dinner was, trying to get them to lower the cost wouldn’t give the best impression to their table mates. She hoped whatever the reason was, the evening had been a success. She was tired and didn’t want to be kept awake by her fathers yelling, or worrying about her mother.

——————————————————————————

Hailey shrugged off her dress and tugged on her nightclothes, wrapping her dressing gown tightly around herself before heading towards the bathroom to wash her face and brush her teeth before bed. There was light coming from underneath her parents door which was perfectly normal for this time of night so Hailey paid no heed until she heard her mothers voice filter out into the hallway.

‘So was tonight what you hoped it would be Ivan?’ Hailey could hear the cautious notion in her voice in case the answer to the question was not positive and her father flew into one of his fits.

‘Quite so,’ her father said and Hailey breathed a sigh of relief. ‘It is all agreed and he will do just fine.’

‘Who will do fine?’

‘The boy.’ Hailey’s interest was piqued, he was talking about Oscar Junior, or Oscar the third, whatever his suffix had been. Hailey had assumed the evening was in regard to business dealings with the older Mr Farrell, not his son.

‘Do fine for what?’ Hailey’s mother asked.

‘As a husband. For Hailey.’

[devilish-mirage]

Clueless

Steven Grant x Fem!Reader x Marc Spector

Warnings; none

Summary; Something clearly happened last night so why are you acting as if nothing happened?

Word count; 1,5k

A/n; I'm back lovelies!

Also Claire is an OC that I'll be using frequently <3

Masterlist | Series Masters

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You woke up with a pounding headache, the sunlight pouring inside from your opened curtains make you groan loudly before you cover your face with your arm to shield it from the light.

"It's too early for this shit." you muttered lowly, taking a few deep breath as you lay there, feeling the warm morning sun basked you in it's glory.

Last night was fun. You went out drinking and dancing with your friends, leting out all of pent up stress of yours that has been piling for the past week.

The main cause was because of your boss, he has some serious issues he need to sort out. He's such a perfectionist, you can't even be late for even a second and that force you to always be in a hurry every morning-

Wait- what time is it?

You jumped out of your bed and look for your phone frantically, once you do you tried to turn it on only to find out that the battery has died. Alright, this is bad.

You took your towel and ran outside, looking at the big clock in your living room that said 7.30.

You've got exactly 30 minutes to get ready, have breakfast and go to work. You won't be able to make it.

So you hurriedly took a shower and dress yourself, shoving your make up and phone inside your purse and ran outside.

You took a glance at your watch when you got inside your cab and telling the driver your destination.

You'd say it was a rather, no, it's a very hectic morning for you. Thank god you were only late by two minutes and your boss is busy inside his office so he didn't noticed you walk in.

"I told you to go easy on the drinking," you look to the side and nervously smile in response, "Well, at least he didn't see me walk in late."

"How fortunate you are, care to help me with these?" you look down and saw a lot of papers on Claire's desk.

"What's all that?"

"Oh, it's the budget for this month event."

You quirked an eyebrow at her, taking one of those papers and read them. "It's a mixed event between our division and Egypt."

Your ears perked up in response, smiling widely when you heard the word Egypt, working with them means you'll get to spend more time with your cute Steven.

She gave you a knowing look with a teasing smile, "I'm sure you're excited for this, you'll get to spend time with your boyfriend."

You roll your eyes but can't hold the smile from forming, "He's not my boyfriend." she hum in response, the teasing smile still plastered on her face. "Yeah and I don't like sandwich."

"But you love sandwiches."

"Exactly."

You playfully glared at her before taking a handful of those papers and scan through them.

"Steven, calm down."

Steven in fact could not calm down, after the 'incident' last night he couldn't slept and has been checking his phone for the millionth times today. Checking to see if you've read his text or replied.

"Marc, you know she always texted us the first thing in the morning but she didn't! Was sending the pic a mistake? Oh god, I-"

Marc rolled his eyes at his alter ramblings, trying to calm him down again before he caught the sight of you smiling giddily at his direction.

"Steven-"

"Marc, I think we've made a mistake!"

"Steven, listen-"

"Oh my god, what if something happened to her?!" Marc snapped his head towards your direction, you're getting closer by the seconds.

"Steven!"

"Steven?"

You and marc said at the same time, making Steven and Marc froze on the spot, "what happened to who?" he stare at you with widened eyes while you softly smile at him, waving your hand.

"Y/n?" he softly said your name unknowingly making your heartbeat quickened, you smile wider.

God, there's just something about the way he said your name, you loved it.

"Hey there, you alright?" you tilted your head to the side in attempt to try and see his face better.

He blinked his eyes at you, thinking of a plausible answer but the more he stare into your eyes the more he got lost in them.

Marc cleared his throat, snapping him out of his daze, he opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by Dona instead.

"Oh, y/n. You're here to discuss about the event?"

You took a deep breath and tried your best to mask your annoyance, why is this Walmart Adelle always in your way?

You smiled, turning your head towards her and nodding politely. "Yes, just doing my job."

Please leave.

Dona nods her head and started to walk away. You grin, thinking that she'll finally leave you and Steven to be alone but no, she looked back at you with a confused expression.

"Are we not going to discuss about the event? It's not appropriate here."

For once she's right. You're in the middle of the Egyptian exhibit and it's noon, which means it's still operating hours so there's a lot of tourist and visitors around.

You let out a disappointed sigh and throw an apologetic smile at Steven before walking away to follow Dona.

"I'll see you around, yeah?"

Steven can't hide his disappointed expression as he watched you walk away from him, frowning deeply as he sits back down.

Marc who watched everything that had just happened in silence was a bit worried, Steven may have forgotten the incident last night for now but that's common for him because Steven gets excited and forget about things easily.

You on the other hand? You're smart, you're attentive, you pay attention to certain things more than people especially if it's important to you and last night incident is definitely important, well, to them anyway.

Still, why are you so casual? Did you see what they send you and felt awkward? But that isn't possible, you look like your usual happy go lucky self. As if last night did not happened.

Did it meant nothing to you?

Marc frown mirrored Steven, staring at your back as you walk further away before turning his attention to Steven.

"Woah, you look like someone stole your lunch." you forcefully smile at her, sitting at your table beside her before huffing loudly.

"It's Dona isn't it?" you put your head down on your table and frown at her, nodding your head slowly, "Yes, yes it's her. I swear she's cockblocking me on purpose."

She hum, looking pitifully at you. You like Steven, she knows that but it was a public secret on how Steven feels about you, and suprise surprise he feels exactly the same if not stronger.

You're just too blind to see that, to engrossed on your feeling to took a step back and just see how his eyes basically lit up everytime you enter the room, how much adoration he held in his eyes everytime that you smile and how lost and disappointed he looked when you're gone.

In other words, you're clueless and so is he.

Suddenly Claire's phone let out a loud ding! She looked at it for a few seconds before laughing and looked back at you who's still staring at her.

"What is it?" she lets out another laugh, "you should open the group chat, it's pretty funny." you slightly frown when you remember about your phone.

"I fucking left my charger at home, my fucking god-" you groan while she looked at you with pity, patting your back softly.

Could this day be any worse?

It's like the Gods above heard your thoughts and decided to answer them. Yes, yes it could get so much worse.

Because right now you're standing at your local coffe shop that's already closed with just your jacket as the storm went by. You should've asked Claire about the weather earlier.

Your feets already hurting by how long you've stand there, there's no chair in sight so you opted to squad and hug your knees. You're so cold, you think you might freeze at any moment now.

God, what's with today? Why didnt you charged your phone? Why did you woke up late? Why did you went out drinking last night?

"Y/n?" you looked up to see Steven staring down at you with an umbrella in his hands, his jacket looks wet, did he just brought this umbrella?

"Hello." you smile tiredly at him, even though you're exhausted you can't help but smile at the sight of him, he just had that effect towards you.

"Are you alright?" he bends down and cup your cheek with his right hand while the other holds the umbrella.

He's so warm that you unconsciously close your eyes and leaned to his touch, savoring the warmness that his palm gave you.

He would've blush if he doesn't notice the way your body's shaking and how cold your cheeks are, you keep leaning to his touch and feel yourself getting drowsy. "Y/n?"

And just like that you collapsed into his arms, the last thing that you remembered hearing is his panicked voice while calling out your name.

×××

I just wanted to say thank you from the bottom of my heart to @friendlyneighbourhood-parker for always being there for me and cheering me up on my worse days. I love u with all my heart and I'm making this series once again for you, my lovely beta read!

And a special thank you for @wysteria-clad for being the most understanding friend and always checking up on me. Love you pretty, P! <3

And to @rmoonstoner, Imma need that dance you promised me, baby.

[missgurrl]

Hoofprints - Chapter 2

Summary: You are the live-in stable hand at Peña Ranch. What happens when the owner of the ranch’s son, Javier, comes back to town? Will you finally be able to open yourself up to love and trust after being hurt?

Word count: 1429

A/N: I hope you enjoy chapter 2. I had fun writing this but it was certainly difficult. Every like, reblog, and comment is appreciated and I am happy to add you to a taglist❤️

Read on AO3 Chapter 1

Javier was looking out the window by the kitchen sink while sipping on his morning coffee. He couldn’t blame himself for watching you work with your young horse in the round pen. He couldn’t stop thinking about the dinner that you two shared together last night. There was something about you that seemed special and drew him in.

The chuckling behind him made him jump and almost spill his coffee.

“Caught red handed,” Chucho teased.

Javier rolled his eyes and said, “I’m just watching her work with that new horse, pop. She was telling me about him last night over dinner.”

Chucho’s eyes widened, “I told you to bring her dinner, mijo. Not have dinner with her!”

Javier shrugged and glanced out the window again, “she seemed to enjoy my company. Said it would be nice to have another friend around here.”

“What, I’m not good enough for her now?” Chucho joked.

“You know what I mean. I can tell how much she appreciates you as a boss and a buddy” Javier replied.

“Yeah, I get it. Just don’t go breaking her heart now, yeah? She’s a real nice young lady and I want her stickin’ around,” Chucho said while grabbing himself a breakfast pastry and then heading towards the door. “If you want to be ‘friends’ with her so badly then go help her check fences before lunch!” Chucho called on his way out.

“Alright, I think that’s enough for today buddy,” you said to Beau as you walked him out of the round pen.

You tied Beau up and went to grab his box of brushes. When you returned, you saw Javier standing before the horse and giving him some scratches.

“I’ve been given orders to check fences with you this morning,” Javier said with a smirk.

“Hmm, ‘orders’, huh?” you tried to say playfully. “Well alright, you can take Sweetie. She’s an old mare that’ll take good care of you.”

“Whatever you say, cowgirl” Javier said with a wink.

You giggled and shook your head. You put Beau back in his stall and then directed Javier towards his horse.

You asked Javier if he needed any help getting the horse saddled since it had been so long, but he said it was like muscle memory for him.

After the fact, he secretly wished that he said yes just for the opportunity to be closer to you.

Once the two of you were tacked up and ready to go, you mounted your horses and headed towards the back of the ranch.

“You can follow behind me until we get to the clearing. It’s gotten really overgrown in this area,” you proclaimed.

Javier was preoccupied by the way your hips swayed back and forth as your body effortlessly followed the movement of the horse’s steps.

You eventually reached the clearing after weaving your way through the thorny bushes and trees. Javier picked up the pace to position himself on your left with Sweetie. You began around the perimeter of the cows’ fence looking for any damages due to last week’s storm.

“So, how did you end up in this area? Or have you always lived here?” Javier asked.

Trying not to get too personal, you said, “Oh I grew up about an hour away. Just kind of wanted a fresh start.”

Javier nodded understandingly. Even though he knew you were being vague, he decided not to press. “A fresh start can be exactly what you need to get back on track. That’s kind of where I’m at right now.”

“Oh really?” You looked over at him curiously.

“I resigned from the DEA the day I flew home.”

“Oh wow, I’m surprised. I thought you were just visiting,” you looked over at him. “The way your dad talks I figured you loved it. What made you resign?”

Javier let out a long laugh. “That’s a great question. Honestly, I was burned out. Spent too much time chasing the same criminals and not enough time seeing them put away.” He looked down at the reins in his hands to avoid your eye contact. You could tell there was more to the story that was bothering him.

“I’m sorry, Javi. I’m glad you’re taking a break and using the opportunity to relax. I’m sure it wasn’t easy.”

The two of continued to ride in silence along the fence for a while.

“I could see myself being happy here,” he said while looking out at the scenery. “As long as you don’t mind another coworker, that is” he smirked at you.

“I think I could manage” you giggled.

Just then you got an idea. You pushed Whiskey forward and hollered, “if you want to work with me then you’ve got to keep up!”

Javier laughed along with you as you raced back to the barn. He leaned forward in his saddle and pushed Sweetie into a full gallop sending up a cloud of dirt behind him. He almost caught up to you, but you still remained two paces ahead of him.

You both began to slow, and Javier turned to you with a smile. “You’ve got some serious skills,” he laughed again, still out of breath from the ride. He moved his horse closer to yours, nudging his shoulder against yours and teased, “Good thing I’m not chasing you down for work.”

“Yeah, I think those DEA agents would have to watch out for me,” you gave a sly smile while wondering how something as simple as this could give you butterflies.

You spent the rest of the day cleaning stalls with nothing but the sound of the barn swallows chirping and horses munching on their hay.

Chucho mentioned he was making one of your favorite dishes tonight and with the knowledge that Javier would be there, you were sure to take a shower and change into fresh clothes. It was about time you admitted to yourself that you had a crush on the man. You tossed on a pair of pale blue cut offs and a paisley spaghetti strap top before heading over to the main house.

Your heart warmed to see Javier helping his father chop up the vegetables that accompanied dinner. He looked over his shoulder and gave you a warm smile before asking if you wanted red or white wine.

Dinner went great with Chucho sharing his favorite stories of Javier growing up. You felt like you were beginning to get to know him a lot better just by hearing what sports he used to play, the different family trips they used to go on, and most interesting of all – the trouble he would get in as a boy. You started to gather that he had the reputation of quite the ladies’ man. It didn’t come to you as a surprise, but it made you curious as to what it would be like to be called his.

After helping Chucho clear the table, you announced that it was time to turn in for the night.

“I’ll walk you back,” Javier almost murmured to you.

You smiled and nodded to him. Even though your tiny house was just across the driveway, you wouldn’t dare object to those warm, inviting eyes.

As you reached your porch, Javier put his arm on one of the supporting beams and aided his weight over you. “I had a really great time on our ride this morning,” he said in his deep, baritone voice.

“I enjoyed it too, Javi,” you whispered as he brushed a stray bunch of your hair from your face with his free hand.

Your heart beat faster as Javier moved his gaze from your eyes to your mouth. You couldn’t believe this was happening.

You both leaned in towards each other slowly, gently grazing your noses and then barely your lips to test the waters. As Javier’s lips began to part, you sucked in a sharp breath out of nerves, and then pressed your lips against his.

The kiss was soft, gentle. His plump lips moved with yours as if they were a puzzle piece. You didn’t want his moment to end. Yet before you knew it, he was leaning his forehead against yours.  

“Sweet dreams,” he said before whispering your name.

“Night, Javi,” you whispered back as you brushed your hand down his arm to find his hand.

He gave you one more tender kiss before he squeezed your hand and turned around to go back to the house.

It was the second night in a row that you watched him walk away with a smile on your face.

[pierrai]

Could I... Request a short fic of a yandere (Bottom!) Orion... Thinking about going so far as to use his looks to charm his beloved because a shallow connection is still better than no connection. Even if they like him just for his body, it's still something, isn't it? ^^

Hello anon! Thank you for the request! Orion is always quite fun to write for, but I do feel bad for him here! I hope you'll enjoy! It's a bit longer than short, but I'm sure you don't mind!

Character: Orion Catesby Word Count: 1757 Scenario: Yandere Bottom Orion charming a S/O using his looks Warnings: Slight NSFW, Unhealthy Dynamic

Orion

Thoughts like this are clearly unhealthy.

Orion isn't dense enough to not realise this, in fact he's all too aware of it. His thoughts about you just aren't normal, but what he hasn't figured out yet is how to put a stop to them.

He tracks your movements today too as you drift from one side of the room to the other, gathering paperwork and flushing it before laying it down at his desk. He tries not to make this obvious, but he suspects you've long since noticed that his gaze always lingers. You pick a sheet from the top and begin to read out the itinerary for the day, but Orion is too busy focusing on the pleasing hum of your voice rather than what it was actually saying.

He'd personally asked that you work under him. Or well, he'd less asked and more so just appointed you to the position. He felt bad about it, telling himself he'd abused his power, but when you continued with your work without a fuss, he tried to ignore how elated it made him feel to be able to see you on a daily basis. He told himself that he was just relieved to have someone so competent and organised around.

Over time, the thoughts he'd keep telling himself grew weaker and weaker and he finally just had to come to grips with the fact that this was how he was. Some kind of obsessed deviant.

"My lord?" Your voice brings him out of his thoughts. He'd completely neglected to listen to anything you've been saying. He'd been doing this more and more recently, drifting off into his thoughts. He was usually so focused, but this must just be another symptom of his obsession.

"My apologies," he says, clearing his throat and bringing his fingers to pinch his sinuses in an attempt to feign exhaustion. "I'm afraid I didn't sleep well last night. Could you repeat the last thing you said?" You smile, politely brushing past his blunder.

"I asked if 5 o'clock is a suitable time for the dinner, my lord," you graciously repeat. Of course. That. Perhaps that was why Orion had felt so desperate as of late. Why his thoughts had been pushed to such... derangement. His father's death hadn't been easy to handle. Everyone knew he was sick, but no one expected him to pass on so suddenly.

"Of course."

Scarcely anyone was worried, though they still mourned. Marquess Orion Catesby, now His Grace Duke Catesby himself, was more than capable of smoothly taking over his father's duties. He'd practically been performing them for years now, yet even now Orion didn't feel ready. He pushed on regardless, not wanting to face the people's disappointment. Now he's worried he's stretched himself too thin. All this work to do, noble lords to meet and reassure, the grief of his father's dead and the burden of reassuring his mother and younger siblings, and above all... this brief curiosity turned sick fascination in you.

"You know, my lord, if there's anything I can ever do to help you more, please let me know. It can't be easy in your position." You smile is both warm and knowing in a way that makes him uncomfortable. He nods.

With all these responsibilities suddenly piled on his shoulders, Orion wonders if he might've just been twisted all along. Perhaps this was just the tipping point.

The day of his dinner arrangements, he'd been thoroughly exhausted. He actually hadn't slept well that night, thinking over and over again at what lords and ladies he'd meet, what words he'd have to say to reassure them that he'd do a good job residing over their lands, and what new and raw emotions he'd feel when he caught sight of you.

Somehow though, he managed to survive the whole day. He even kept his hand steady as he raised the final toast, honouring his father and promising to carry on his will. Thinking back, that toast made him feel worse about where he is now, with such thoughts running through his mind.

Alone. With you. In his room.

He didn't plan for you to be there. You just happened to walk back with him. He just happened to invite you in for a drink. You just happened to accept.

"I didn't know you were open to this sort of thing, my lord," is what you say as the your body is pressed tight against Orion's. Orion thinks twice about telling you that he isn't, but you don't sound entirely serious anyway. He's never been so close to you. Does it matter if you have the wrong idea? Who's to say you won't feel different if he lets you do as you please with him? Such thoughts make him feel sick to his stomach.

"I'm not against it." You quirk your eyebrows amusedly.

"I won't land myself in trouble, will I?" Don't be ridiculous, he quickly thinks. He wouldn't tell a soul.

"Of course not."

A quick hum of 'good' is all the more you say before you've pulled Orion back down by his collar, using the momentum to roll him onto his back so you're on top instead. Your lips lock with his so passionately he feels he may pass out from how deliriously happy he is, and he hardly wastes any time reciprocating.

He wonders if, from his show of enthusiasms, you must think he does this often: sleeping with whoever he likes for pleasure. He doesn't want you to think that. This affection is for you and you only. His hands tug at your clothes eagerly, and you take the hint, pecking one last kiss to his lips before stripping off your jacket and undershirt. He's always pictured what you must look like under your layers, always tried to quell the thought before he imagined to much, but now he actually gets to see it. He didn't quite realise how filthy his thoughts could be until he was allowed to act upon them...

Regardless of the uncertainty pitted in his stomach, he brings his hands to your waist and revels at the touch of bare skin against skin. Your open mouth meets his. Soon his shirt too is being tugged off his body. You grab handfuls of his chest and he can't stop the muffled moan from leaking out the gaps in your connected lips.

You seem to enjoy such a reaction. Your hands are so deft and skilful that he lets you do whatever you want, only gripping onto your waist or hips or assisting you in unfastening what clothes he still has on. He never imagined himself in this position. It's perhaps the most humiliating position he could imagine himself in, but since its you who's put him there—you whose hands are running along his skin and you whose teeth nip at his neck—his thoughts of humiliation are overwhelmed by lust instead.

When the deed is done, he feels both elated and severely uncomfortable. His insides are raw and he's completely spent. You're out of breath too but not as dazed as him. He wonders if it's obvious now that this had been his first time, but if you know, you still don't make comment. Perhaps you enjoyed the thrill of using a Duke, no matter whether it was right or not.

Orion thinks it's wrong. He thinks it's wrong but he tells himself doesn't care either. If you want the pride of fucking a duke then he'll be the duke you'll continue to fuck. If that was how he could keep a hold of you then he doesn't want to allow you to claim any other prize but him.

You're now both his colleague and something more. Your day-to-day activities with him are both the same but different.

Sometimes Orion finds himself being intentionally provocative. It'll be late into the evening, dark enough outside that the hearth is burning the same as the candles at his desk. The more the work day dragged on, the more Orion would convince himself that it's perfectly reasonable for him to want to unburden himself of his suit jacket... or unbutton a few buttons of his shirt.

He thinks about how many times he's chastised Alastor for wearing such loose and shameful clothing when he unbuttons far enough down that his chest is clearly on show. He's such a disgusting hypocrite.

And of course, he doesn't have much time to deny what his end goal of all of this is when you glance up from your paperwork and do the slightest doubletake, before asking if he's perhaps gotten a bit too warm. Every second your eyes scan over his body, he grows more excited. A small 'perhaps' is all he can manage to respond with.

And to his gratification, you pin him down on his desk and rip through the buttons of his shirt still fastened the same evening.

The act itself is always so satisfying. Afterwards, in the post-sex bliss he'll find himself longing to stay close to you for hours longer, ignore all his work and simply exist with you in a deeper way than just fucking each other. When he's alone again is when the regretful angst starts seeping in and he questions what he's even doing. He doesn't want to be a trophy but it's all he'll ever be.

You saw the relationship as something more shallow: Orion was the duke you worked under, and the duke you just also happened to regularly bed. But to him, you were a lot more. He was obsessed with you. Day by day he wanted you more and more but all he could ever have was this one part of you.

He didn't know if you slept with other people still, and honestly, the thought made him feel nauseous, instead he just had to hope the loose way you acted around him was a one time thing and not indicative of some larger trend. He didn't want your hands on anyone else but him, and if tempting you with his appearance was what he needed to do to keep you satisfied with him and only him, then that's what he'd do. Even if you'd been with other people before him, he wants to have you now. You won't need anyone else if it's always him pinned under you. It's not like he knows where else to go from here anyway and any thoughts to the contrary are ones that only scare him.

[nicolesainz]

New Romantics (Part VI)

Carlos Sainz x OC x Mason Mount

Warnings: loads of angst, jealousy and fights, but of course fluff

Chapter 7

Fast Forward to Monaco GP

Mason’s POV

I usually hate such glorious and flashing cities but I’ll admit that Monaco has been breathtaking. A few months before me and a few of the other England boys, decided to attend the Monaco GP, since we’ve all got friends who work in the industry.

Ever since we came back from Imola, Quinn has been acting not like herself. I miss her radiant smile and innocent jokes. She doesn’t attend all the games like she used to and I feel the emptiness taking over me as I see that her seat is empty at the Chelsea box.

She had put the fakest smile on her face when we went out on our first date. Nothing has been official between us. She didn’t want to turn me down and cancel the date. I truly didn’t want to force her into anything.

A few days after the Grand Prix, we were at her house watching a movie, when suddenly at 1 am, her phone started blowing up. Texts, calls, voice messages. Everything. Quinn ignored everything. Before she left to go to the bathroom, she asked me to type a message to the person calling her.

“Tell him that he’s dead to me”

I pick up her phone worryingly, only to realize that it was Carlos who was buzzing her phone. What could he possibly want?

I look through all the messages he’s send her and my heart sinks. My heart keeps on telling me to stop reading but my brain says otherwise.

Sainz: I miss you close to me

Wanna come at the next GP? I can assure you we will have fun!

I want you to be mine

Dump your little footballer and be with me

I can make you happy in ways he can’t even imagine

I wanna taste you. I can’t help thinking he may be touching you right now

Please call me baby

I was physically unable to type the text she wanted me to. Why was Carlos sending her all these messages? What has happened?

When Quinn came back to the room, she grabbed the phone from my hands and typed a new message to Carlos

Quinn: Please never contact me again and don’t ask my brother about me. Forget me!

Her face was emotionless, only a few faint tears rolling down, which made me immediately take her inside my embrace and hold her tight. She started crying harder than beforehand, so I decided to stay with her for the night. Hold her hand until she finally felt safe.

Fast Forward to today, I asked Quinn if she wanted to come with me and the Grand Prix. I told her that we will be around the Red Bull garage and not near anywhere that she wouldn’t want to be. I promised to her that I wouldn’t leave her side even for a second. If she felt uncomfortable at anytime, we would leave.

“If this means spending more time with you, then yes, I’d love to come along” was Quinn’s reply, which made me even more excited than I already was for this trip.

Now, the sun has risen in Monaco and i slightly open the curtain, trying not to wake Quinn up. It’s been days since I’ve seen her be so peaceful. She’s asked me to stay over a few nights and I always do.

I’m scared as to what Carlos may had said to her that day in Imola. It slipped out of Heidi’s mouth that she wasn’t in the bathroom and in fact, she went to console him after his crash with Daniel.

After she came back, she wanted us to leave the minute the race ended. She didn’t utter a word for two hours, until I heard her cry in the bathroom. She wouldn’t tell me what happened so I didn’t pressure her any further.

Before I was able to open the balcony door, I heard a loud groan coming from her side of the bed.

“Masey!” Her voice was so soft that I immediately rushed to her side.

“Good morning Quinny” I replied to her as she threw her arms up and pulled me for a hug

“Did I bother you too much last night? Do you maybe want me to sleep in the couch? I don’t mind, I do it all the time at home”

“What? No you didn’t! In fact, I should be asking you if I was the one who bothered you? I couldn’t really sleep last night and was turning around the whole time”

If I could, I would be beside her in the same room, on the same bed hugging her for the rest of my life.

“Can I-um-ask you a question?” I say trying to get the words to come out of my throat

“Uh oh. What’s wrong? Did I do anything?” The smiley look on her face disappeared instantly

“What has happened between you and Carlos? You can tell me only if you want. If you don’t, that’s more than alright. I just hate seeing you being in a bad mood and you haven’t really been yourself since we got back from Italy. Did he do something to you?” Now I’m anxious for the reply I’m about to receive

“I used to like Carlos, when he first became my brother’s teammate. Lando was always against me dating Carlos and I didn’t think it was a good idea either. At the end of the 2019 season, McLaren threw a massive party. Lando invited me as his plus one. Carlos at the time had broken up with his girlfriend. After a few drinks, my brother had dozed off back at the hotel and I was still with Carlos. We started getting a little flirty with each other until we were making out on the couch. I thought finally something may happen between me and him, but things got even worse. He told me it shouldn’t have happened and that I should have stopped him. He blamed me for the whole thing. When after 3 months it was announced that he would leave for Ferrari, he came up on my door drunk, trying to convince me to talk to Lando, because he was angry at him. Then, he started apologizing to me too and afterwards he started kissing me but I stopped him. I didn’t want this to be my last goodbye to him. After that night, I stopped going at my brother’s races, I only attend Silverstone and I’m sitting at the grandstand to not be seen by anyone”

I was shocked by Quinn’s statement. She had to stop seeing her brother for the sake of not bumping into a guy that she liked but made her feel uncomfortable. She is the sweetest woman on earth. Why would anyone think of saying and doing such horrendous things to her?

“I swear to you that I will never put you in that position. I am so sorry for forcing you into saying this Quinn. I feel really bad now. I shouldn't have asked you that question” I lower my head as I reach for her hands. 

Quinn places my arms around her waist and hers around mine, tying us into a loving hug. She could probably hear my heart beating extremely fast. She is one of the few people who see the real version of myself. 

“I sometimes wish my brother had picked up football instead of racing. This part of his life will keep on haunting me.” She whispers, with her face buried on the crock of my neck

“It doesn’t have to haunt you. I won’t let it take over you. We will go through this together” I try to comfort her as much as I can. I feel like I shouldn’t had brought her here. There’s too much of a possibility that we will bump into Carlos.

“If you want to leave this place, I will take you wherever else your heart desires. Name the place and we’ll hop on a plane” I pulled her face closer to mind, my breath hitting her lips, inches apart.

“As long as I’m with you, the place isn’t a problem to me. What did I do to have you in my life Mase? I don’t deserve you” Quinn’s words drive me crazy. I don’t hold back and I connect our lips together with a hungry kiss. She doesn’t back off and immediately opens up, as my tongue is being swiped above her lower lip.

Her hands are attached to the back of my neck, whilst mine are placed a few inches under her thighs. We don’t let each other go or even take a breath. I can feel all her tension being released and finally she lets go.

Suddenly, my phone starts clinging and I very much regret not having silenced it.

We break apart from the kiss and Quinn hands me the phone, still ringing.

“It’s Foden” she exclaims and I start to panic as I remember that I was supposed to meet him.

“Yeah yeah, just gimme 15 minutes mate. Overslept.” I hung up and I turn to Quinn who was at the bathroom trying to get ready as fast as she can.

“Mase, you should go. I will come and find you. I know where the Red Bull station is. If I get lost, I’ll just call my brother or Daniel” she says in a rushed tone

“No way I’m leaving you alone in Monaco. The place is a shithouse. You could get lost! Not risking it” I raise my voice at her, not because im angry, just because I’m scared to go without her.

“You know it’s not my first time at Monaco? I know my way around. Plus, I could also call Charlotte. She’s Charles’s girlfriend and lives here”

I just want to guard her and not leave her unattended. I need to reassure she won’t bump into Carlos.

“Are you sure? I’m gonna blow up your phone if you don’t reply to a text or a call in a minute!”

“Yes! Just go. I will come find you immediately. Don’t worry. I will be more than alright.” She reassures me by leaving a small kiss on my cheek.

“Fine. Please be careful. If you need me anything just-“ she cuts me off before I could continue my phrase by shoving her hands in my shorts, playing with the lace of my boxers

“If you don’t leave, I will be the one to keep you here. And I don’t place nice, Mount”

I bit the inside of my cheek, trying to hide how turned on I was at the moment.

“You’re a tease. Call me once you arrive at the paddock.” I grab my pass and sunglasses before I head out.

Quinn’s POV

Monaco is so noisy and dazzling! It’s probably one of the craziest, if not the craziest motor racing weekend to exist! Monaco is the jewel of formula 1. Drivers want to show off. A win at Monaco can be equivalent to winning three times in a row.

I wouldn’t bother stepping my foot on that paddock again, if it weren’t for Mason to invite me. This whole place feels so claustrophobic, even though it’s in outer spaces.

While I’m getting dressed, I ring Charlotte to come and pick me up. Well, mostly accompany me. The track was just behind our hotel so access was very easy.

“Quinn! I’m so happy you’re here! I’ve missed you being around here” she gave me the biggest hug and smile.

Sadly, most of the Formula 1 Wags were portrayed as gold diggers, PR stunts and incapable of holding a relationship. I feel bad for all of them. They are some of the nicest girls I’ve met in my life.

“I missed you too Cha! I’m glad I decided to come to Monaco. How have you been?”

We were walking and catching up on what has happened in our lives. Obviously I skipped the Carlos part in Imola and mostly mentioned Mason, with whom she seemed to be really excited about. Just like Heidi.

“Oh, by the way, you have to meet Isa. She’s really nice and sweet. You’ll love her!” Charlotte exclaimed once we entered the paddock

I took out my phone and typed a message to Mason.

Quinn: Don’t worry about me, I just arrived at the paddock. I’m with Charlotte. I’ll be around in a few.

Chelsea’s Masey : Thank god. Thank you for letting me know, love!

“Oh! Who is she? I haven’t seen her around the paddock before?” I reply to Charlotte as I raise my head and look around

“Probably because you haven’t been here in two years. She’s Carlos’s girlfriend” my breath is cut in half instantly.

Carlos has a girlfriend? And we almost fucked a few months ago? I feel so horrible, that my instinct says to run away. Leave Monaco and never attend another race again. Not even Silverstone.

“That’s new! Really happy for them!” I say in the sweetest manner I can possibly act with.

“Oh there she is. ISA! OVER HERE!” Charlotte yelled and a blonde haired woman, made her way towards us.

“Hey girls. Oh, by the way, my name’s Isa! You must be Lando’s sister, Quinn?” The Spanish woman greeted me with the most soft and genuine smile ever.

“It’s very nice to meet you Isa! Pleasure to meet you in person for the first time” we exchange hugs instead of handshakes.

“So, will you be attending any other races? I heard you’re not the biggest fan of the sport”

“It’s mostly my job that keeps me occupied and away from the paddock. If I could, I would attend as many Grand Prix as possible. But yes, I will be at Silverstone too. Last one of the season for me”

Oh what a flat out lie that was from you Quinn. But we move on.

“What? Why? I was hoping you’d be at more of the race weekends. Cha won’t always be here, so I was waiting for a new friend to hang around with”

If I didn’t manage to make Carlos a better person, then I hope she succeeds at improving him. She’s such an angel on earth! I don’t even know how a cruel man like Carlos would be with such a pleasant girl like Isa.

I take a quick glance at my phone and see that Qualifying was on its way to start. I excused myself from the girls and went towards the Red Bull garage. There I spot Mason, on his phone, calling me.

“Hey handsome, look behind ya” I said holding my phone to his face

“I was about to go look for you. Doing alright?” His hand grabbed my waist and started caressing my back softly

“Oh yes. Sorry, I got a bit caught up with a few of the girls. I apologize if I made you worry even more Mase” I lay my head on his forehead and I receive a small kiss by him.

“Lando came over. He said he wanted to see you after Qualifying. Something about Silverstone and the tickets or something like that”

I knew this wouldn’t be about Silverstone. McLaren’s garage was next to Ferrari’s so he could have seen me talking with Charlotte and Isa.

Q3 ended in a very abruptly way, with Max not being able to finish his flying lap, Charles on pole and Checo having crashed severely, dragging Carlos alongside him. It’s a very tricky track, so crashes are more than expected but definitely not hoped to happen.

When I finally found my brother, we had a conversation that I never thought would actually take place between us. Apparently the night Carlos had texted me, Lando was with him. He was drunk and hopeless. On the outside he seemed to be doing really good, given that he was performing and claiming podiums, but on the inside he hated himself for what he had done to you. Your brother knew the whole situation.

“This was the reason why I wanted you to avoid Carlos. This is the reason why I don’t have a girlfriend! A stable relationship isn’t on an F1 driver’s plan whether we like it or not.”

“I know. But you don’t wake up one day and decide for who you’ll fall for. It just happens Lando. And I fell for him. Hard. But now it’s gone”

“For your own good I hope it is. I don’t want neither Isa nor you to get hurt just because he’s a senseless asshole. I appreciate and love him as a friend but he’s fucked up so many times”

I’m thankful Lando still couldn’t read the room and realize that the reason I hadn’t been showing up at races was Carlos. That would infuriate him. I don’t want to ruin their friendship. Just because he and I have a rocky past, doesn’t mean I’ll take his best mate away from him.

A few hours later, we arrived at the paddock again, at an event Red Bull was hosting. Most of the teams and mechanics had left. Only a few had remained, wanting to perfect their cars for tomorrow’s race.

I was sitting on the couch, smiling and making small talk whenever someone would approach me. Every now and then Dias or Foden would pop up and ask me if I needed something.

Suddenly, I felt a body crash next to mine, realizing it was Mason’s.

“Wanna help me take some pictures around the paddock? The team needs them for PR, and I’d be so much more fun if we did it together” he explains and I immediately agree.

We find ourselves a few empty spots and the cameras in my phone starts clicking, trying to capture the beauty of the man in front of me. As a childhood friend, I hadn’t bothered in noticing how handsome Mason actually was. Not only was his smile genuine every time he looked at me and the cameras, but he also brought the fuzzy feeling back to my stomach. Last time I felt that was at Imola, again with him. And I think this was a sign.

“Any good ones? Do we have the result? I have a feeling they’ll be great”

“I think we got a few great shots. Take a look” I hand my phone to Mason and a smile appears on his face.

“I should hire you as my personal photographer. The boys hate taking pictures of me so I always slip in some selfies for the content Chelsea needs”

“I’ll take you as many pictures you want, whenever you want and wherever you want”

His arms are wrapped around my waist, hugging me from behind, as I look through the pictures I took. I was stunned by how good he looked at every single one of them. I found one that particularly drew my attention.

“Mase, do I mind if I post this one on my story? I’d completely understand if-“ Mason shuts me up with a soft kiss on the lips. He’s suffocating me in the sweetest way possible.

“Don’t even ask me again. You know the answer is yes.” His lips haven’t left mine, leaving small pecks constantly.

“And I’d truly love to be spotted everywhere else with you too.”

Is what his caption said, when he reposted the story on his account.

This was a bold move, considering we weren’t even properly dating yet. We were so comfortable with each other that didn’t care about what people would say. And a lot would expect him to be shy and private, but he would always post pictures of us hugging, kissing each other on the cheek, playing games and now this.

“Hey, guys, sorry for the interruption, but I need Mason to come with me for a sec. A guy wants to meet him. Apologies for taking him away Quinn” Phill said with an apologetic frown on his mouth

“Oh no worries. I’ll be here Mase. Take as much time as you need” I informed and smiled at both of the footballers.

I sat with my back on the closed Red Bull garage of Sergio Perez, looking throw my phone, when I heard a familiar voice getting closer and closer

I immediately started panicking, looking around me like a lost puppy, wanting to be saved. I felt like screaming Mason’s name but couldn’t for some reason.

Carlos noticed my heavy breathing and grabbed my shoulders trying to calm me down and then softly caressing my arms. His touch felt like hell on my skin. It didn’t have that effect it used to

“Get away from me, please” I removed myself from his grip and took a few steps back

“I’m not here to cause you any troubles, I just wanna-“

“Leave me alone Carlos! For fucks sake” I yell at a higher pitch

“Just let me explain Quinn. I won’t do anything. You have my word that-“

“I don’t wanna hear a single fucking word coming out of your mouth Sainz! Because I know it will be a lie”

“For the love of god, just give me five minutes and you won’t ever see me again”

“Good! But I’d rather not give you any minutes. Leave me alone”

Before Carlos could start his sentence, an intense Mason came towards our way, clearly angry with him being near me

“If you even dare to make a step closer to her, I will make sure you never drive again” he threatened the Spaniard and covering me with his body

“Dude, I only want to apologize, what the fuck is wrong with you?” Carlos replied and shoved him.

“Who guarantees us that this apology will be true? Huh? What if it’s just a sack of bullcrap?” The Englishman firmly said, going closer to Carlos

“You don’t know the story man. Just fuck off. I promise not to harm her. I don’t intend on messing with neither her nor you, but apparently, you’re in the mood to fight” Carlos exclaimed loudly while rolling his eyes.

“There’s nothing to say Carlos. It’s over. You’re the reason I stopped attending the races! You’re the reason I keep telling my brother excuses. You’re the reason I’m scared of falling in love. You’d do us a great favour if you simply left. Without a single word” I break apart the two men and turn my attention to Carlos.

His eyes were starting to tear up after the words came out of my mouth. He was in a very vulnerable position. Completely defenseless. Pure sadness and disgust filling him up. He hadn’t just ruined his life and happiness, but also the life and happiness of the woman he loved the most in the world.

Who was now in someone else’s hug. And all he could do was sit there being saved and treasured, by someone who wasn’t him.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Author’s note: I feel like I’ve “villain-ised” Carlos way too much in this story and I apologize to my fellow Sainz fans. I hate doing this to this wonderful boy. He’s such a sweetheart but for the sake of the story, let’s pretend he’s a dick.

Probably more than 8 parts will be needed in this story. I’ll see if the story fits to 10. This is getting a bit out of hand.

I love you all and hope you enjoy ❤️

[xian-1502]

2/2

And i felt bad about that. To me, what i thought was my blunder made my brother feel like being open was a possible minefield, which is something i also needed get real about since it’s so painfully evident that what happened there was NOT my fault and i somehow made it that way in my head. But that among other spots of shaming or shunning from family and poor friends made me wrongly assume how the world was and what i should be as a person. Woe was me 🤯. But i’m out of the woods now at least, or understand a facet about myself that i left unquestioned better, and i hope that’s a certain forecast of progress.

For reference everything prior was stuff that’s been drafted and noted throughout January. Not chronological or anything just complied into a sort of megapost. What follows is solely related to last night, february 3rd-4th

I’m feeling a lot of things. Im glad i don’t have work today, because i feel like going there in the mood i’m would only make me more upset considering how customers and management have been getting on my nerves lately. but that’s irrelevant, what i’m saying last night wasn’t the greatest. It wasn’t extreme, nobody is damaged or harmed, and everybody made it home so nothing active or ongoing concern. But as a whole just going through the time wasn’t fun to me. Firstly it was an opening party at a club an hour away that i knew next to nothing about the details surrounding other than the fact that the invite was from a afrobeats dj who’s a regionally known family friend. I was originally just hoping there would be good music but on the way after we picked up everyone who was riding in the car, i was told some family friends in the kenyan circle who were my age would be there (they were not, i was one of 3 people under 25 from what i could see if not, highly unfortunate for some people). We got there and the venue was filled with crowd that was notably older than me, but the music was alright. So i figured it would be tolerable at least. I spent my time at the bar drinking lemonades when this dude came up to me and asked me if he met me before and how long i’ve been in the country(since the majority of the club goers that day were immigrants among the last 20-40 years and shared the moving experience). i answered and then the talk ended shortly after when someone else he knew came to say hi and talk to him. I will spare the fluff on this accord but this story ends with me getting grope/humped on the dance floor by this dude when i got up to dance to a song i liked. it dawned on me later that he was definitely eyeing me after the initial interaction cause i did see him looking at me when i would walk around or when i was waiting in line at the bathroom but i just thought it was like the look of knowing more so than sizing me up to act since i didn’t clock that he was reading me as a girl. (i was standing in the wrong spot at this point which is likely what contributed to my fate since if i was in the right like that dude probably would’ve stepped off immediately) That ruined my mood a great deal and i really wanted to just go home at that point but i didn’t know where the people i came with were and i knew they were inebriated so i had to ask my younger aunt who was sober (since she was driving herself and her boyfriend) to help me find everyone and get ready to leave. I will not that or less significance in my mind, some drunk lady i swear i don’t know but somehow knows my name tapped my shoulder and was like “heyyy christian i didn’t know you’d be here!!” and went for a hug so i just opted cause that’s the normal reaction but then she went to do the french double cheek kiss thing and didn’t move far enough on the second swing leading to almost straight on my nose. So i twisted my head and tried to step away as a little whiskey scented spot was planted on my cheek. This being before airport casanova set up his game plan to cop a feel. But those two events contributed to making that experience unfun and i’m even more upset with myself that i let myself end up in that situation. im happy that nothing really bad happened and that i could go home fine unhurt and all, but it’s what’s stoking my frustration at myself is that i let myself get convinced into going, knowing i would rather stay home. I really wish i could go back and unfold under the pressure but that gets me nowhere as i already know yet im still bitter at myself over it. I at least know for certain i’m never gonna allow myself to end up in that situation again so that’s good, but as it stands now, i am just not in a great mood over it. I’ll get over it though for certain though so it can culminate to be whatever at the end of it all.

[cinnamon-bunni]

Day 7: Flowers

very short, but oh well ;; it isn't the best thing i've written, but writing Don's sisters (well more specifically one out of the three) is very fun and im happy to finally post something with at least one of them <3 Read it on Ao3! Word count: 813

“You need to stop this madness.” All Eduardo did was enter the dainty little flower shop, and he was immediately met with his sister’s voice, dripping with venom.

He paused at the entrance. “Last I checked, I haven’t done a single thing wrong.”

“Eduardo,” she growled, “do you see this shit?” She waved her arms frantically over at a pile of many, many bouquets. All of which were made of red, vibrant roses. “Do you know how many there are?”

He counted. “What, six bouquets? Isn’t that what you make on a slow day?”

“Plus the other fifteen in the back,” she hissed. Isabel rushed out from behind the counter, and over to the entrance, just to push an accusing finger into his chest. “Which accumulates to a total of twenty-one orders. In one day–more specifically in four hours!”

He couldn’t help but smile. “I can’t apologize for being so popular, Isa.”

“Yeah, but you can pay for making me do all this fucking work.” She gave a long sigh, as she moved away, defeated. “Honestly, I have to work day-in and day-out on these orders, working until I pass out and my hands are cramping, but all you have to do is look pretty for the cameras and get beat-up by a seventeen-year old.” Eduardo decided against telling Isabel the fact that he too constantly injures his hands while boxing, or the fact that he had, in fact, got knocked out plenty of times in the ring. 

“And it’s like, ‘oh, Isabel! Sweet and mature Isabel, can you handle the shop today?’ and then they completely forget I even exist! I swear, all they ever do is put me to work and never give me time for myself. It’s almost as if they forget I exist, or that all I’m here is to just do the work for them.”

Eduardo sighed. He shook his head as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“You want me to take care of the orders for you, don’t you?” Suddenly, Isabel’s attitude changed like a flick from a lightswitch, as she clasped her hands together in a pleading position and shut her eyes tight.

 “Please? Pleasepleaseplease please do this for me?”

“No.”

“Oh come on Eddie! Not even after that tear-jerking lament of being a forgotten middle child?”

“You seem to forget that I’m a middle child, too.”

“No, a fake one. We’ve been over this before. I’m the true middle child.”

“This is certainly not helping your case, by the way.” Isabel gave a dramatic groan, which made Eduardo’s corners of his mouth twitch into a smile.

“No fair! I promised my friends I would go out with them tonight, but then Mamá told me about all of the orders, that we need to do something with them since they’re all dressed to you–thanks for that, by the way–and now I’m gonna have to de-thorn them, cut off stems, organize them, wrap them up, and add all the final touches requested in the order. Do you know how long that’ll take me?”

“Majority of the night–?”

“Majority of the night! Eddie, please do this, just this once?” He stared down at her sister as he contemplated. 

“You do know that I just got back home yesterday, right? A long flight from the States and dealing with the jetlag and time zone difference really takes a toll on your body.” Because apparently having a six-hour difference made it difficult to function, or fix your internal clock to go back to normal.

“Yeah, but I had to work overtime for a week straight, and I’m going to kill myself if I have to do it one more time. So please? I promise I’ll make it up to you!”

Isabel looked up at him with tired, pleading eyes. Her fingers were no doubt calloused from how much work and stress she puts them under, but even then, she balled them up with such emotion and power that made it clear how much it meant to her.

“Fine,” Eduardo sighed, finally caving in, “I’ll cover for you just this once.”

Isabel let out an excited gasp. “Wait, really?”

“Really.”

“Oh my God! Thank you thank you thank you! Have I mentioned that you’re my favorite sibling?”

“Yes, but a reminder is always appreciated.” Suddenly, out of nowhere, Isabel gave him a tight hug. He instinctively put his arms around her in response.

“I promise I’ll make it up to, I swear.”

“You better,” he huffed with feigned annoyance. “I’m sacrificing my night for you.”

“I know, I know. But thank you.” She pushed herself off of him, and, with a smile, untied her apron and threw it over the counter. “See you later!” She ran out the front door in a rush, and a giant smile on her face.

Hmph. Well, one night of work wouldn’t hurt anyone.