#go to dog shows they said... great way to make connections with people they said... yea when u speak the same language 😭

[butchshepherd]

one thing i would be interested in, when we live somewhere nicer, is fostering a dog or two, or even dogsitting but im partial to fostering in regards to the whole allergy thing because it would be for a longer period of time without being a 12+ years commitment. but that's also something that we can't do just yet so once again all i can do is try to be patient and focus on things i have to work on myself that aren't directly related to dogs.. and my brain says that's booooring

[morganbritton132]

I love the newer teachers not knowing who Eddie is and visiting Steve at his house and wondering how they can afford such a nice house. I can imagine that they live in a house way above a teachers salary, much less a teacher with presumably, a lot of medical bills. They see gold records hanging on the walls and all of Eddie’s awards on a bookshelf and they are trying to connect the dots to who Eddie is.

David’s first impression of Steve is, admittedly, not great.

He was hired as a long-term substitute halfway through the school year and technically, Mr. Harrington was the only teacher on their floor not to introduce himself to him. They’re supposed to cover the eighth grade lunch period together, but Steve hasn’t shown up once since David was started three days ago.

Instead, the principal covered for him.

Cindy McCullen, the gossipy history teacher across the hall from him, says that it’s because of favoritism. She says that Principal Moreno always lets her favorites run rampant around the school and lets them do whatever they want, especially if they’re tenured. Steve Harrington is the most egregious example of blatant favoritism.

David starts to form an opinion about Mr. Harrington in his mind that only gets worse with every story he hears from Cindy. So, it’s a bit of a shock when Steve shows up for lunch duty the next day with a whole ass service dog.

He feels like an asshole.

Especially because Steve is so apologetic about missing the last three days and leaving David to ‘the wolves’ during his first week, “Is this your first teaching job? I’ve heard from the kids that you’re doing great!”  

He makes a conscious effort after that to get to know Steve and to stop letting other people form his opinions for him. Though, admittedly. He kinda fucks that up too.

The first time David meets Eddie, he thinks that he’s Steve’s brother.

It’s not that Steve doesn’t talk about his life outside of work. It’s just that he doesn’t go into a lot a detail. David knows that he’s married to a man, that he’s from Indiana originally, and he might have a kid. Maybe? A girl name Erica that tells him what a brony is and how they ruin everything.

Hell, David’s not even entirely sure he knows what Ozzy is in service of. Steve just said that he bumped his head one too many times and now he has a dog so his husband stops worrying so much.

The only surefire thing that David knows is that Steve has a brother that’s a bit of a dork. He has great hair and is really smart, but lacks tact. Steve loves him. You can tell by the way that he talks about the guy.

So one day, David is in the teacher’s lounge heating up a cup of Easy Mac while Steve is sitting with his head down at one of the tables. He’s about to suggest that Steve go home and sleep off whatever cold he has when a guy with long hair and a leather jacket sticks his head in the room and declares, “You look like shit.”

Steve doesn’t even lift his head when he flips him off which is – whoa, not something that David would expect from Mr. Harrington. He makes himself busy with stirring his mac and cheese while the two bicker with each other which is, admittedly, childish.

Leather Jacket’s main argument for why Steve has to listen to him and go home is because he’s older. Steve croaks out that that is bullshit and Leather Jacket threatens to call their Uncle Wayne if Steve doesn’t listen. He eventually agrees.

Before they leave, Leather Jacket sticks his hand out to David and introduces himself as the cooler Mr. Harrington (that gets a laugh out of Steve).

So, color him shocked when Steve invites their event committee over to his house.

David hasn’t even fully gotten over how nice of a neighborhood Steve lives in on a teacher and retiree’s salary when Leather Jacket gets introduced as Eddie, the husband Steve has mentioned. Then he just casually mentions a red carpet like, what?

And the craziest part is that he’s asked about his husband before!

Steve mentioned once that his husband was out of town and when David asked what he did for work, Steve said that he was retired. He said that his husband can play guitar and that one of their friends (James Hetfield) needed a last minute guitarist for some kind of fair (Coachella) so Eddie went to help out.

He definitely worded it like playing guitar was just a hobby that his husband has, not like. Not like platinum records lining the hallway to their bathroom or the picture of Steve and Eddie in Vegas with KISS stuck to the fridge. He swears the note on the dry erase board by the garage entrance signed ‘Dave’ is in Dave Grohl’s handwriting.

There’s an Grammy on the bookshelf by the fireplace.

Who the hell is Steve Harrington?

Better question: Who the hell is Eddie Munson?

Kathy laughs the entire drive to her house and she is still laughing when he drops her off. The only thing she says that could even be considered an answer is, “I think he’s on Tiktok. Start there.” 

[hindahoney]

If you want to code-switch so often that you are nearly incomprehensible to goyim, here is a list of my favorite and most-used Jewish terms:

Schvitzing - Sweating. (Ex: "I'm schvitzing so much it's showing through my clothes.")

Schlep - A tedious and long journey, depending on usage it can mean that you were carrying something. (Ex: "I had to schlep all the way across campus, my backpack was so heavy." Usually denotes a long walk, but other forms of transportation are acceptable too. "You drove all the way to New York from Florida? That's quite the shlep.")

Shtati - Something really cool. (Ex: "I visited my friend's place and they had a shtati mezuzah!")

Neshama - Soul. (Ex: "Mazel tov on your conversion, you have such a strong Jewish neshama!")

Balagan - A big mess, chaotic, confusing (Ex: "Moshe forgot to bring challah for shabbat dinner, and it turned into this big balagan")

Achi/Achoti - "Achi" literally means "my brother," but can also be used like bro or dude, "achoti" is the feminine equivalent meaning "sister"

Yalla - Come on, let's go (Ex: "Yalla yalla, you're going to make us late again")

Mishpacha - Family. Doesn't have to be literal blood relatives, usually a sign of warmth or friendship. (Ex: "I care about every Jew, they're all my mishpacha.")

Pshhh - Interjection sound, to express respect or agreement with what someone is saying, but can also be playfully poking fun at someone taking themselves too seriously, can be used sarcastically.

Achla - amazing, awesome, great, the best (Ex: "You graduated from university? Achla!")

Sheina Punem (Shayna Punim) - Pretty face (Ex: My bubbe kept pinching my cheeks and calling me a sheina punem) Can be used ironically, in which case it means "a disgrace."

Ahavat Yisrael - to love your fellow Jew (Ex: "I firmly believe in ahavat yisrael, even if it's hard sometimes.")

Schande - Shame, dishonor among the nations, meaning a Jew who represents Jews badly, a serious insult. (Ex: "He's a schande, he feeds into antisemitic stereotypes.")

Schmutz - Dirt, stain. (Ex: "Use your napkin, you've got schmutz on your face.")

Amalek - Any enemy of the Jewish people. ("[Fill in blank] is the modern Amalek, they hate the Jews.")

Lanceman/Landsmen - Two jews from the same place, a point of connection between two Jews who now live far away from their hometown. (Ex: "Your grandma is from Crown Heights? Mine too, our grandparents are landsmen!")

Goyisch - Something not Jewish (Ex: "I don't listen to Taylor Swift, her music is too goyisch for me.")

Goyischekop/Goyische-kop - Goyisch head, a jew who thinks/sounds like a non-jew. (Ex: "How could you say about your fellow Jew? Do you have a goyische-kop or something?")

Kindaleh/Kinderlach - Little children (Ex: "I passed by the school and saw the kindaleh on the playground, they're so cute!")

Chamud/Chamuda/Chamudi - Sweetie, cutie, usually aimed at children, but can be a term of endearment between a couple. Can be condescending when said rudely to another adult, like "Sweetheart" can be in English. (ex: "Goodnight, Chamudi. I can't wait to see you tomorrow.")

Daven - to pray ("Are you going to join us for davening?")

Frum - A religiously observant Jew. ("He's frum, he davens three times a day.")

Treif - Unkosher, generally something not good, doesn't have to literally refer to a food. ("I trained my dog to stop barking when I say 'treif!'.")

Bubkis - Zero, nothing, nada ("Moshe got a gift from bubbe and I got bubkis.")

Kvetch - To complain ("I'm just kvetching, I'm not that upset about it.")

Kvell - Extreme pride. ("I heard your daughter made it into her top school, you must be kvelling!")

Mensch - A good, admirable person. ("He volunteers every week, he's a mensch.")

Chillul HaShem - Disgracing God's name, someone who does something that makes Jews look bad.

Kiddush HaShem - Something that sanctifies God's name, brings honor to God. ("I love seeing you wear a kippah, it's a kiddush HaShem!")

Bubbe meise - Little white lies ("He told his teacher a bubbe meise about his dog eating his homework.")

I should acknowledge that these are mostly Yiddish words, as my experience is primarily with Ashkenazi Jews. If you would like to add common slang from your community (like Ladino phrases, Judeo-Arabic, Italki, etc) I would love to learn about them!

[zarasu]

What I think about Bingge

So, funny story: I did not start out liking Bingge. I doubt most people do. The first thoughts I had about him were "Damn, boy's fucked up" and "Who starts ripping off limbs without even asking questions first?" He seemed more like the final boss of a horror game than a fleshed-out character.

Then I finished the book and went "Ehh do I wanna read the extras?" Tbh, I skimmed a lot of them but the Bingge vs Bingmei one was one of the few I fully read, just because the premise sounded interesting.

And it was interesting alright, to see Bingge do something else than torturing people and ripping off arms. But none of it really made my brain light up until that little scene where Bingge watches Shen Qingqiu fuss over Bingmei. Then he asks him to come with him, to choose him, and Shen Qingqiu says no. Bingge returns to his own world, sad and alone.

"Well, sucks to be you," I thought, and "lol, I sure hope that doesn't awaken anything in me."

...

Two weeks later, I found myself lying in bed, thinking about Bingge with a single tear rolling down my cheek.

I really shouldn't be sad for him, I told myself. He has a big harem full of hot women to tell him how great he is all day. If he's not happy, then it's really his own fault.

But what if he's more the monogamous type, my heart wailed back. Or what if he's too fucked up to let anyone love him??

Ugh, alright, I gave in. Let's think about him then.

So, Bingge is a power fantasy made for incels. But even Bingge was Bunhe once. He shares a past with Bingmei and they are, at their core, the same person. And if you can say one thing about Bunhe, it's that he really has an undying hopeful streak. Sure, when Shen Yuan transmigrated, it took him a while to gain Bunhe's trust. But even after all the beatings and insults and humiliation, he did gain it.

Bunhe gave him his trust because he desperately wants Shen Qingqiu to love him. And, if not love him, at least like him. And if not that, then at least not hate him. When Shen Qingqiu actually showed notions of doing just that, loving him, he was all over that like a dog getting a treat and a head pat for the first time in his life.

But Bingge never got that. He hoped and hoped and kept hoping for Shen Qingqiu to show even a hint of affection and all he got in return was the firm assurance that, no, Shen Qingqiu would never feel anything but hate for him.

That has to give a guy issues. Probably makes him feel deeply unlovable. Hate himself, even. Binghe is a little dumb about things like these, he likely didn't give up hope until Shen Qingqiu physically pushed him into the abyss. He probably spent a lot of nights in the abyss crying into his dirty little sleeves.

But you gotta find ways to cope with heartbreak, right? So, eventually, lightly charred Bunhe stood up straight, turned his little determined protagonist eyes up to the sky and said: "I'm going to make him regret it! He will rue the day he cast me away!" And he went on to become stallion protagonist #1, demon emperor, conqueror, etc etc.

The thing is this: if you build your whole identity on the idea of making the guy who hates you regret his feelings, you're not really over him, you get what I'm saying? You're like, the opposite of over him. Not a good emotional state to connect to the hot women throwing themselves at you either.

So yeah, after that, Bingge did all kinds of things that aren't really that important, but eventually, he got Shen Qingqiu where he wanted him: in the water prison (also kneeling at his feet). And I'm sure I have an inkling of what went on in his dumb little head. It may have been something like:

"Aha!! Now I have the evil Shizun in prison, where evil men like him belong! Finally, people have told him how evil he is! I'm going to go and talk to him and make him see the error of his ways. And when the horror of what he did finally dawns on him, and he apologises, I might forgive him and give him another chance."

Shen Jiu being Shen Jiu, he probably laughed right in Binghe's face and also spit at him too, for good measure (as is, in this case, kinda relatable). So Binghe's righteous little plan didn't quite work out as he wanted it to. This procedure might have been repeated a few times but, well.

Binghe's emotions are already volatile on a good day. Add Xin Mo to that. Add childhood trauma and Shen Jiu to that. One time, he snaps and reaches out to rough Sqq up a little, just to make him regret his own behaviour. Underestimating his own strength, he rips off his arm instead.

Awkward situation, that.

What are you supposed to do after ripping off someone's arm? Maybe Binghe just went to bed and stared at the ceiling for a while, thinking about his life choices.

See, at this point, another person might have thought: "My life is going in the wrong direction. I need to change something, maybe go on a journey of self-discovery or something."

But Binghe has never been the best at things like morals and ethics, no matter what version of him we're talking about. Even Bingmei, who had a comparatively more stable home life, never really got the hang of that stuff (Turning some people into lifeless husks? Well, better than fucking someone, right? The man you love apparently just isn't as insane about you as you are about him? Time to destroy the world^^)

Anyway, you gotta go on, and I'm sure Binghe found some convincing enough arguments for why ripping arms off was an acceptable thing to do.

"But Zar," you may interrupt me. "How can anyone think that's an acceptable thing to do?"

See, in all honesty? I think, deep inside, Binghe knows it's not. But right next to that knowledge lies another knowledge: it's that he's unlovable. And if he's unlovable, it can only be because, at his core, he's already rotten. And if you're already evil? You might as well do evil things, doesn't make much of a difference anymore.

So things escalate, surely not helped by Xin Mo. Shen Qingqiu loses limbs with the same speed other people lose socks, and when even that doesn't heal him of his evil ways, Binghe comes up with the whole Yue Qingyuan plot. And when even that doesn't help, he loses his patience and kills everyone.

Then he sits there, on his throne, surrounded by hot women, fully charred, not so little anymore, and without a Shizun he can hope to one day convince of his worth.

There sits Shen Yuan, a world away, growing increasingly frustrated at how purposeless Bingge's life has become.

Then the extra happens, and Bingge gets transported to a world where another Binghe got everything he ever wanted: the love of his Shizun. And, all at once, the hope he thought he had killed and buried flares back to life, never having been dead after all, and burns Binghe up until he's nothing more than the bare bones of his desperation.

But the other Shizun doesn't love him. He only loves the other, inferior Binghe. He looks upon Bingge coldly before he sees his husband and his eyes turn warm. And it's like Bingge is looking at a funhouse mirror, at a world of dreams and wishes that never came true.

In the end, he's still as unlovable as he has ever been. And he goes back to his own world, and he feels flayed with the knowledge of everything he will never have.

And I just think it's impressive how Shen Qingqiu manages to break every version of Binghe without even trying.

[jq37]

FH Junior Year Post-Season Thoughts

With another season of Fantasy High in the books and my recaps all finished, I wanted to do an overview of my thoughts on the season as a whole. Even though I feel generally positive about my experience with the season, there are a few things I think maybe could have been done differently narratively or mechanically. This isn't to criticize the way the season went down or to backseat DM/Play. More my combined ten years of college for textual analysis and storytelling bleeding through, haha. 

I first want to start with the things I thought worked really well.

Fantasy High has "High" right in its title but, in past seasons (and especially Sophomore Year), not as much time as you'd think was spent actually at school and even if it was spent at school, there wasn't much time spent in class or engaging with the realities of being a student. This season really dug into the academic consequences of skipping your classes all the time and the realities of needing to do a ton of extra stuff to try for a scholarship and I think that was a refreshing thing to highlight for a change. Being more scared at flunking out than the dragon that's trying to eat you feels very emotionally resonant. Real "High School Is Killing Me" vibes for anyone who's a fan of NPMD. 

Even though Fantasy High is a show that has some deep emotional beats and strong character arcs, it's first and foremost a comedy show. From the jump, everyone was generating bit after bit that had me cracking up as usual. "Little girly dog collar" is one of the funniest combinations of words I can think of. I think it was Siobhan who said that this was the goofy season and, having seen it, I'd have to agree with her. It never failed to make me laugh and it was always a highlight of my week.  The cast just has great table chemistry that I love to watch no matter what they're doing. 

Watching some of these high level combat encounters is as close as I'll get to understanding people watching sports. Even though combat is generally my least fave part of D&D, I think the cast really killed it this season with how cleverly they played and Brennan came up with some really great combat encounters. Special shout outs to Baron's Game and The Last Stand for their unique mechanics.  

This is going to be one that's on the other list as well because my feelings are mixed, but I genuinely do like the downtime mechanic and how it forces hard choices. I think it's an interesting way to connect a mechanic to the story and cultivate stressful atmosphere for the season.

I have problems with the execution but I love the Rat Grinders in concept. I think as early as season 1 I was hoping that we'd meet a party that was like the Bizarro Bad Kids and the idea of a party that's farming XP instead of going on crazy adventures is a strong concept. Likewise, I think a character that's jealous because of your "cool" (read: tragic) backstory is also a fun trait for an unhinged antagonist in this kind of setting.

This is me absolutely showing my bias but I adored the Abernant Sisters content this season. I dunno if Siobhan specifically asked Brennan to not put her on a bus with the other beloved NPCs or what but I'm so glad she stuck around and we got the development we did. It was almost entirely ancillary to the plot but there was this clear pattern of Aelwyn getting softer and sweeter towards Adaine over the course of the season, from the guarded, "Enjoy the nemesis ward," to, full I love you's and, "I'd take them to get you." It was way more focus than I expected considering that Aelwyn completed the bulk of her arc last season and a lot of the time, a redemption arc basically ends after the big gesture (in this case, Aelwyn taking a magic blast for Adaine in Sophomore Year). So the fact that we got to see all of these sweet moments of them reestablishing their relationship outside of do or die moments was such a pleasant surprise. Again, I fully admit I am extremely biased, but this was my top wishlist item and the season overdelivered so there's a baseline happy I'm always gonna be with Junior Year. 

OK, so moving on to things I things I think could have been tweaked.

Even though I liked the downtime system and the pressures it created, it also squeezed out the chance for more casual PC to NPC interactions that would usually be more common because they were semi-locked behind the relationship track and there wasn't an obvious benefit to roll for Relationships (as opposed to something like Academics which was crucial for not flunking out). Making the mechanical benefit more clear would have helped that (even if it meant Brennan didn't get his reveal--which he ended up just telling them anyway so might as well do it early). The other thing is that the consequence of a rage token was so bad that of course they spent all season avoiding getting one. Things might have gone differently if the consequences had been a bit more obscured, like in Neverafter. And it could have been a nice parallel to the Rat Grinders to take this unknown resource that makes things easier for you but is also having this negative effect. Then it could be like dang we did the same thing they did unknowingly. 

I mentioned this in my recap but I'll talk about it again. It is a little confusing to me that we did the Ankarna subplot right after we did the very similar Cassandra subplot. It took up so much time this season which I don't think is an issue in and of itself, it's just that we literally just went through some extremely similar beats last season. Why double up on this same storyline when there's so much new ground to cover? Or if we're going to raise a god, why not make it a different kind of god? One theory I had early on was that the Rat Grinders were trying to raise their own god to one-up the Bad Kids but instead of raising a chill, misunderstood Cass type, they accidentally raised a god who was erased for a good reason and got in over their heads. 

It's fun for there to be connections between seasons but sometimes it's like, OK that's a *lot* of coincidences. Like the god who your rivals is trying to raise *happens* to be the wife of your cleric's god and also *happens* to be the god of the fiend trapped in your friend's mom's chest and that fiend *happens* to be the relative on your bard's dad's side which is *also* the reason she is randomly cursed? That's a LOT of red string connecting plot points. As unhinged as Kipperlilly is about coveting Riz's backstory if I saw that go down I'd be like you have *got* to be kidding me.  

The mystery elements didn't feel like they clicked as well as they did in other seasons. I think that's partially because Porter's plan was so convoluted (seriously, I made another post about how haphazard his plan was) and had all these moving parts and we didn't get clear answers for a lot of mechanical things like how the rage crystals actually work and when they were implanted and stuff. You had stuff like Devil's Honey which I think is super cool as a thing that exists in the world but ended up being an element that just led the players down the wrong path and had a relatively small payoff (that Porter was using it to lie to Ankarna). I think it's plausible that a forgotten god would be willing to listen to anyone saying the right things without introducing this element. (As opposed to, for instance, Ambrosia which has a very clear connection to what's going on and is a solid clue that someone is flirting with aspirations of godhood.) 

The Porter reveal came so late in the season that even though it was a fun/challenging fight, there wasn't a lot of emotional weight behind killing him. It was basically just dunking on a teacher Fig has always hated who was also mean to Gorgug so screw him. Which, valid of course. But the Bad Kids were never going to react as strongly to Porter as they were to the Rat Grinders so putting Porter in the prime villain spot isn't necessarily what I would have done if I wanted the fight to be more than just a brawl--especially since we've done "School admin with student minions" already in S1. I don't mind the full circle callback but it would have been nice to pick something else for the sake of variety. We haven't had a child mastermind yet and I think Kipperlilly could have been a great candidate for that. My friend suggested that it would have been fun if Kipperlilly was trying to become a god instead of just being Porter's underling and I agree. "I'm not anyone's chosen one so I'll choose myself," is still within her established jealousy and Type A tendencies. If we want to keep Porter involved since that was Brennan's gift to Emily, maybe have it be that instead of Kipperlilly working for him, he's working for her. Like Artemis Fowl vibes! And the Rat Grinders can be varying levels of on board--from true believe to redeemable. I don't think Brennan planned for the Bad Kids to ever redeem her so might as well go full megalomaniacal mastermind with her and make her The Villain if she's not gonna be nuanced anyway. If My Little Pony can do it and send a literal child to Tartarus for pony treason (or whatever Cozy Glow did), Fantasy High can too. 

Continuing from the above, if we have the Porter fight in place of the Grix fight (a la Daybreak) and don't use Ankarna, that gives way more time for the Bad Kids to investigate the Rat Grinders throughout the season and it would mean that they would have their personalities developed a lot more. With the limited downtime, they Bad Kids didn't have a lot of time to spend on these kids who were just hating on them for no good reason (valid). But if you cleared their plate of the god hunt stuff, they'd have more time for this. And if they weren't all rage zombies to varying degrees, it would be easier to see them as characters. Besides Kipperlilly (and, funnily enough, Mary Ann) we don't really have a good read on what these kids are actually like. The little time we spent with them all season was kind of a wash if them breaking out of rage means their personalities got laundered too. Anyway, regardless of how their loyalties ended up shaking out, it would have been fun for them to be more than the minions that they were in canon. As funny as it is for them to just kinda be XP farming losers, they did have the potential to be more interesting in their own right if they weren't just Porter's minions. And again, we've done adults forcing or coercing children into being minions in Freshman and Sophomore Year already. Lemme see some self-created child maniacs! (Or, peer pressured child maniacs. That's cool too. The Lucy/Kipperlilly dynamic is way more interesting to me if it's like girl, I would take a bullet for you but I CANNOT walk this path with you any further in response to *I* will be a god and you can be *MY* champion.)

Anyway, those are my thoughts! Like I said, I have my points that I think could have been tightened, but overall an enjoyable season and I will be glued to my screen if they decide to close out with Senior Year! 

[pennyserenade]

i have thought in great detail about coriolanus and sejanus, and whether or not coriolanus ever really liked sejanus. i think that the novel/movie are purposefully constructed to make this ambiguous, but i prefer to veer on the side of "yes, he did."

coriolanus' way of loving people was...lacking, to say the least. even with tigris, he thought awful, mean things about her, but it was evident he cared very much for her. the problem with coriolanus was not that he couldn't love -- it was that he could not love without first being assured that his investment would yield positive results for him. at least, he could not readily admit to himself that he was loving until he knew it was going to work out for him.

his character is very succinctly summed up by sejanus, when he tells him, "I remember that from school, watching you watch other people. Pretending you weren't. And choosing the moments you weighed in so carefully" (397). without fully knowing the totality of it, sejanus got it all too right: coriolanus took people in, measured them out, decided what they meant to him, and weighed in when he thought it'd benefit him. coriolanus was calculated in all things, most of all in love—a thing he knew made you vulnerable.

but that's not to say what coriolanus said to himself was the exact same thing as what he felt. if it was, i do not believe he would've done half the things he had done for sejanus--even given the prospect of reward in the end. this is part of what makes coriolanus descent into evil so heartbreaking: a part of him was good. he did want for connection and comfort, even if he had a real fucked up way of going about getting it. coriolanus was a dog that bit without fully knowing why; it was a protective instinct he used, because so much of his life had been filled with loss already.

in the book, after coriolanus snuck his father's handkerchief with lucy gray's scent into the tank of snakes, he went to sejanus' house. this is an incredible detail that so many people tend to overlook when they talk about coriolanus and sejanus' friendship. the beginning of the chapter reads:

"What had he done? What on earth had he done? His heart raced as he blindly turned down one street and then another, trying to make sense of his actions. He couldn't think clearly but had the dreadful feeling he'd crossed some line that could not be uncrossed" (287).

we start this chapter with a frenzied, rattled coriolanus, one terribly afraid of what he had just done and the consequences this action might have later. he was scared and isolated, and he didn't know what to do. a little further on, collins writes: "His feet had carried him far from home, but he realized the Plinth apartment was just a few minutes away. Why not pop in?" (288).i find this construction of words to be fascinating, especially in relation to coriolanus--a character we have come to known as calculated and precise, even in moments when he has to think on his feet. one could argue that during this part of the book, and in this state, it makes sense that coriolanus might wander that far from his home absent-mindedly. it shows how out of touch with himself he had become, and just how much the act he had just committed disorientated him. but i think it was more than that. i think coriolanus wanted to go to the plinth's house, that he was seeking comfort after he had done something incredibly dangerous (something, arguably, that sejanus might have done), and he could not admit it to himself. and his original intention had been to see sejanus, but sejanus was asleep.

the fact that collins wrote "his feet had carried him" and "he realized" is so brilliant. i’ve got lots of opinions about why she chose to write the book in a third person point of view. one of the reasons i think she did it has to do with the fact that coriolanus was distancing himself from himself--shedding culpability through phrases such as these, especially in moments like this. coriolanus did love sejanus, but he simply could not admit it to himself because sejanus was not a safe or wise investment to make. coriolanus refused to give credence to his need for him, and it ended up killing the boy in the long run.

[harlowsbby]

All About You

Being set up on a blind date by your friends was the last thing you wanted to do this year, you didn’t know what to wear or how to even act you haven’t been on a date with a man since what seemed like forever ago.

“You’re going to be fine besides he’s someone you already know.” Your friend Erica was trying her best to ease your nerves. “Someone I know? That just makes this all even worse.” You huffed.

“Will you relax I promise you’re going to have the time of your life.” Your other friend Ella said. “But you both need to seriously stop setting me up with people we know.”

Your last date was with one of your close friends and it didn’t really go all that well. “What? I thought the date with Marcus went good?” Ella asked you to which you stopped what you were doing and gave her the most irritated expression.

“Are you kidding me? He knew he was going out with me and didn’t bring his wallet because he claimed he’d cover us next time.” Ella covered her mouth to stop herself from laughing in your face meanwhile Erica felt pitty on you.

“I promise this dude he’s sweet, funny, charming.” Ella tried her best to describe Jack and although he was all of things she mentioned he was also a flirt and loved flirting not to mention the two of you connected well but there was this unresolved ‘beef’ there.

You just hated how unserious he was no matter how serious the situation was Jack somehow always found a way to make a joke out of it and you hated that and he hated how serious you were.

While you were getting ready Jack was back home getting ready with Druski and Urban and the rest of the guys. “Who did you set me up with this time.” Jack asked Urban.

“It’s a secret but I’m sure you’ll love who we picked.” Urban smirked. “Why are you smirking? Did you both set me up.” Druski laughed. “I promise it’ll just be a date to remember that’s all.”

Even though the two of you bickered like cats and dogs and didn’t really see each other’s opinions you both liked each other but just didn’t know how to act on those emotions which is why your friends felt that they needed to bring it upon themselves to act on those emotions for you.

“When is the date?” Druski looked down at his phone seeing Jack had to be out the door in 5 minutes. “Actually right now so let’s go.”

Jack was actually very nervous about going on a blind date he hasn’t been on an actual date ever since he became famous he didn’t know how to act or how to feel, having one on one time with someone he knew for however long was also nerve wracking, he wanted everything to just go good.

————————————————————————

You arrived before Jack so you had time to look over the menu and pick out the cheapest item just in case you had to pay.

Ella and Erica along with Druski and Urban were a few tables behind Jack and You they wanted to spy on your little date and see how everything was going to go down.

You looked down at your phone seeing that Jack was 10 minutes late already. “Great let me find out I just got stood up.” You mumbled.

“Y/N? Don’t tell me you’re my date.” You looked up seeing Jack. “Oh you’re fucking joking this is a joke right? Are you on some type of prank show or something is there a mic hooked on you.” Jack smirked and laughed before sitting down across from you.

“Well I was told my date was going to be wearing black heels and.” He pushed his chair back and looked under the table seeing you had on black heels. “You have on black heels and you’re sitting outside where I was told my date would be sitting.”

“Why are you here?” You groaned. “Because I was put on a blind date.. why are you here?” He joked. “Jack you know why I’m here I was put on a blind date I knew it was going to be with a friend but I didn’t think the friend was going to be you.”

“What’s wrong with me? I can be the man of your dreams.” He grinned and leaned back into his chair with his arms opened wide as if he was the greatest person on earth. “Please I’d rather go on a date with the biggest asshole on earth than date you.”

You looked down at the menu skimming it over again Jack frowned he knew you didn’t wanna be here but he was going to try his best to make sure you have the best time.

“Look put the menu down for a minute.” You put it down on the table and looked back up at him. “If you have a good time tonight you let me take you out on a proper date that isn’t set up and if you don’t have a good time then you don’t have to see me ever again.”

You gasped sarcastically. “Wait you mean it? We never have to be in the same room together ever again?!” He rolled his eyes at the sarcasm dripping from your voice. “Do we have a deal or not?” You thought about it for a second. “We have a deal.”

Surprisingly you had a great time with Jack you found out a lot about him and he found out all about you, you even got to see a different side of Jack a side he never really showed.

“So what was your thought process behind making Jackman?”

Jack played you a few songs from his upcoming album Jackman he was a bit nervous on how everyone was going to react since it was something completely different than what he put out not even a year ago.

“Honestly I knew I wanted to put out something raw.. something different and just get back to my roots come home the kids miss you was a great album but it’s what the media and everyone wanted to hear it wasn’t me it wasn’t Jackman.” He joked.

“I loved the songs you played for me I think you just might have album of the year with this one.” He chuckled. “I really hope so.” It was quiet for a few minutes the two of you just enjoying one another’s company.

As you looked around Jack couldn’t help but to admire you. You were absolutely perfect he loved the way your eyes shimmered under the moonlight and how plump and kissable your lips looked, the small smile that played on your lips as you watched an owner get dragged along by his excitement filled dog.

“You know I can feel you watching me Jack.” He blushed in embarrassment. “I’m sorry you’re just so beautiful.” He covered his mouth quickly when he realized he said that out loud.

You looked at him wide eyed, “Did you just call me beautiful?” He mentally groaned. “Shit that wasn’t supposed to come out my mouth but it did and dammit I’m sorry.” He apologized.

“It’s okay don’t apologize. I actually think you’re really cute too.” You looked down nervously and twiddled with your fingers. “You think I’m cute?” He smirked.

“Don’t go getting a big head now Jack but yes I think you’re cute.” “How long?” He asked.

You looked at him with your eyebrows furrowed together. “How long what?” “How long have you liked me?”

“What who said tha-.” He cut you off. “I know you like me Y/N, I catch you looking at me all the time and you know Ella sucks at keeping secrets.” You groaned and made a mental note to yell at Ella later.

“I’d say for a few months now I’ve just been scared to tell you.” He frowned.

“Why?”

“Because I just didn’t know if I actually liked you at first because you just always acted so immature but after tonight I guess my feelings for you became stronger or whatever look can we just forget about it.” You we’re beyond embarrassed now.

“What if I don’t want to forget about it what if I wanted to be more than friends?”

“I’d be really happy.” You shyly spoke and watched how Jack made his way to sit next to you. “You would huh?” He softly spoke and leaned into you. You nodded your head you couldn’t even find the words to speak.

“Use your words Y/N.” You looked at him his blue eyes were honestly putting you in a trance right now you’ve never been as nervous and jittery around a man before. “Yes I would Jack I’d love to be your girlfriend.”

Before you knew it he was closing the gap between the two of you and smashing his lips against yours you wasted no time and immediately kissed him back. He grabbed the back of your head and deepened the kiss he wanted more of you but you were in a public setting so he had to pull back.

“Damn it’s about fucking time.” Druski’s voice came from behind the two of you which startled you. “What? What are you all doing here.” Jack asked.

“We set this whole thing up.” Erica said. “What do you mean?”

“Well we knew the two of you liked each other but you’re both so stubborn that we knew you weren’t going to admit it to each other so we set this up.” Ella said.

“It’s a good thing we broke it up when we did I swear there was about to a porno at this restaurant.” Urban joked and you hid in Jack’s chest making the girls coo.

“Whatever Urban now if you all don’t mind I’m going to take my girl back to my place, Urban you might wanna spend the night with Druski.” Jack said and took your head and led the two of you out of the restaurant.

“So I guess I’m staying with you tonight?” Urban asked Druski. “Staying with who? I got plans with Erica you better hit up Maggie and ask to stay in Jack’s old room.”

(Honestly I had no idea what I was doing with this but I hope y’all still like it 😭💘)

[sparklegemstone]

Loki at Paley Fest 2024

It was incredible! I'm so happy I got the opportunity to attend, and it uplifted my spirits so much. I really hope Paley makes the panel available for everyone to watch at some point because the questions and discussion were pithy, thoughtful, and engaging. Just a stellar panel. If it doesn't become publicly available, I'll try to circle back to post more detail of what was discussed.

Hiddleston was absolutely firing on all cylinders being his eloquent self going on long explorations of themes and the human condition. I think the most memorable was when he was exploring the relationship of Loki's line "Satisfaction is not in my nature" from a previous film to the events of the Loki series and whether that was relevant or not relevant to where the character arrived at in the series.

First of all, kudos to the host of the panel (also writer of a MCU timeline book) that came with receipts and Loki and Hiddleston quotes from over a decade ago that he used to ask really interesting questions that explored Loki's journey and highlighted the beautiful ways Hiddleston has thought about playing the role over years. He just did an excellent, excellent job, and is the one that brough up the "satisfaction is not in my nature" quote to prompt discussion.

And let's be honest, I think a lot of panelists, whose job is to sound engaging and fill up panel time, when asked to explore the relationship of that "not satisfied" quote to the most recent content they filmed, would just turn on their "I'm in English class" brain and run with the prompt and improvise some ideas of how the theme of not being satisfied is shown in the series. But rather than just running with and affirming the prompt, Hiddleston actually thought about it sincerely and turned it around answering in the negative, that he wasn't sure if that still applied in the series. So instead of just running with the prompt, he cared enough about the art to give it the most truthful answer he could. I saw that aspect of how he approaches discussion when I met him in person at a comic con a number of years ago as well, that interest in exploring something sincerely rather than doing the easier thing of just running with whatever is expedient, and I love that about him.

And then Wilson displayed great comedic sense and flow of the discussion by capping off Hiddleston's eloquent discussion by doing a sharp right turn into the absurd, pivoting into how "would my dog have any meaning in his life if he was satisfied and had everything he wanted and wasn't constantly eager for his next meal". That got a huge laugh from everyone.

Some other anecdotes from the event:

For the arc of the series, it was described as season 1 being about Loki learning to love himself and season 2 was about learning to accept connections and let the love of others in.

Hiddleston's wardrobe was lovely -- all black and dark grey, with bright red tread on the bottom of his shoes for which sitting at a panel with your legs crossed is the perfectly opportunity to show off that pop of color.

I was also digging Aaron Moorhead's style with a grey top half and orange pants and shoes with blue socks. Love this trend of men making bold color choices in their wardrobe.

Hiddleston was, unsurprisingly, very engaged with the whole discussion and it was fun to watch his reactions when other people spoke. The host asked the writers/directors if they'd created S2 with it in mind of it being Loki's last appearance or whether we might see more of Loki in the future. Wilson playfully said "he comes the tap dancing" and Hiddleston very deliberately turned towards the writers/directors with his chin on his fist like "I'm so curious to hear the answer, do tell".

Sylvie ended up in a McDonalds in S2 because when Di Martino got asked at the end of season 1 where she saw Sylvie going next, she told them "she's hungry, I bet she'd go for a burger". So Di Martino takes full responsibility for that particular decision, lol.

Because comedy films aren't my thing and Wilson hasn't crossed my personal radar much besides Zoolander, which is a delightful film, I found it very interesting and wasn't necessarily expecting just the thunderous amount of applause and huge reception that Wilson got from the audience. He's very popular.

During the panel, every so often a little piece of paper, like 2x2 inches, the kind you'd use to create the effect of dumping a bunch of confetti, would fall from the rafters above the stage and slowly float down until it landed on the stage itself in front of the panel. The first time was peculiar, but it continued to happen five distinct times throughout the panel and became a bit of a running joke.

Before the Q&A, they screened the finale episode, and they did not have their tech sorted out. The film didn't play at a consistent 24 fps and there were parts that lagged and slowed down the motion on screen. A minor thing really, but for an organization whose sole purpose and mission is media (Paley), in a venue (the Dolby Theater) that hosts the Oscars and should be technologically state of the art, you'd think they'd make sure they could play video at proper speed. I just thought it was a funny issue for a media organization to have.

Tagging @delyth88 since I know you were interested in hearing about it.

[thesiltverses]

Hello! Just wanted to say, and hopefully this isn't an odd compliment to receive, how much I adore the episode titles of the silt verses. One of my favorite things to do after I get someone to listen to tsv is point out that the episode titles make a poem when you read them back to back. It always tends to blow their minds and I get great satisfaction from seeing their reactions. What I especially love about them is how they can stand on their own and reflect events of the episodes while still connect with one another to make a bigger picture so to speak. (For example, how Faulkner and Carpenter's reunion episode in s2 is titled "But We'll Never Be Rid of Each Other" to reflect their relationship as two people that can't seem to untangle themselves from each other, for better or for worse ((and how this title hangs over the episode ominously when contrasted with how happy their reunion makes listeners, as if just waiting for events to come)), but then connect it to the next title "My Song, My Sorrow and I" and it slightly changes the context where it feels more like it examines the characters' various complicated relationships with their gods)

(Though, on a tangent, speaking of episode titles and how they match each episode, I think constantly about "One Final Fall From Grace" with Faulkner and how it's the episode where he loses all but one of his acolytes, idk there's something about it that gets me so bad/pos)

I was wondering how you go about deciding on episode titles? Has the poem already been written out since the very beginning of the show? Is episode order dictated and determined by said finished poem? Or am I overthinking how each line fits each episode? What made you decide on this format compared to I am in Eskew's episode naming convention? Sorry for such a long winded question! I just cannot overstate how much I adore the episode titles, sometimes I'll go back and read everything all over just to hear the words.

Thank you very much!

So the plan was always roughly along the lines of:

Season 1 titles begin by trying to outline a kind of epic poem, then get distracted by describing its hold over the poet

Season 2 titles are about the poet's yearning to be free from the poem, but ultimate acceptance that their fates are entwined

Season 3 is about the realisation that the poem will outlive the poet.

Beyond that, there's generally plenty of flex and it remains a semi-spontaneous act of play - like you say, I might think I have something in mind and then realise at the last minute that another line works better for the themes of the ep (and sometimes there's no thematic relevance at all and it's just filling in a necessary rhyme to keep the whole thing going).

This leads to imperfections and a bit of a shaggy-dog story feel - if I could go back without confusing everyone, I'd correct the very first ep title to 'First I'll Sing Of Revelations' so the terminology is consistent - but I like imperfections, and I like shaggy dogs.

As to why? It just felt like a different way of being playful; the Eskew titles were fun for me because of their simplicity (I have vivid memories as a very young kid, not being old enough to be allowed to watch the video-tapes of Blackadder II, all of which had really evocative, teasing single-word episode titles - 'Head', 'Money', 'Potato'. So I'd just sit back on the floor and imagine what those meant.)

But for TSV, it felt appropriate and fun to begin with these trappings of epic storytelling and religious verse in the episode titles, and then gradually pan outwards to show that it's more of a story about being entrapped by stories and the impossibility of escape.

[leafyaa]

Chapter 2.

Shinobu introduced you to her many friends and acquaintances. She had many connections apparently which didn't seem so surprising considering the fact that she was a quite well known shrine maiden before quitting and turning towards the legal industry.

Now she was working under Arataki Itto, otherwise known as the number uno itto which you slightly cringed at but found funny.

Speaking of Itto, he was a quite energetic and loud guy. You were surprised how he and Sara were friends. Or maybe he just annoyed her to become friends with him? Whatever the case was, you enjoyed his company.

Gorou was another friend of Kuki and Itto. And he too was part of the Inazuma police, just from the Sangonomiya prefecture. You thought for a second of asking him for help but it didn't even make sense considering Hikari went missing in Narukami prefecture.

However, he was in the higher ranks as he was a police deputy chief. Actually he was in the second highest position.

In your mind you wonder if you should ask him.. Though you also argue that you're wasting his time off..

"Hello Y/n! Nice to meet you, I'm Gorou!" Gorou said with a smile and held his hand out for you to shake.

You reacted slowly and shook his hand gently.

"Nice to meet you.." You mutter with a small smile.

Gorou watched how your sad eyes glowed under the bar lights and nervously scratched his head.

Sure he saw a smile on your face but your eyes told that you weren't feeling happy.

"Wanna have a drink?" He asks, trying to get into some small talk with you.

"Sure."

The two of you walk towards the bartender and ask for two shots of tequila.

After the drinks are made the two of you walk over to a sofa in the corner of the bar where it was less crowded.

You take a sip of the tequila and are hit with a taste of nostalgia from the drink. But it also stung pretty badly so you almost choked.

"Easy there. You wouldn't want to choke." Gorou says, casually drinking the glass in one go. "Now, tell me about whatever is troubling you."

You find out Gorou was a great listener and so told him about Hikari. His face saddened by the news of her disappearance and comforting you by patting you on the shoulder.

You end up crying a little bit but quickly wipe your tears away, not wanting to show a sense of vulnerability.

"Give me your number, I'll see what I can do for you." Gorou says in a serious voice, yet gently smiling.

Your puffy eyes slightly light up and quickly pull out your phone from your purse and show him your number.

He texts you a sticker of a cute Shiba inu dog and you added him as a new contact.

"Thank you.. For listening, Gorou." You say as you put your phone back in your purse.

"Of course. It's not a problem." He smiles cutely and signals for you to stand up.

"Let's continue to enjoy this night, shall we?"

You end up staying much longer than you had originally planned for. Yet, still enjoy the company of your old and new found friends.

How many shots did you take? Well uhh you kind of lost count. But does it matter?

It was 8 am- wait no 3 am- why did the 8 and 3 look so similar??

For some reason there were still a bunch of people at the bar. Gorou already left while Itto and Heizou were pretty drunk with Sara and Shinobu watching over them who were slightly drunk.

But you? Well you were quite drunk. It wasn't visible much because you were too tired to act on it so it just seemed you almost took no shots.

"Shinobu.. Sara.. I'm heading home.. Be careful.." You say with a tired smile.

Sara looks slightly worried but Shinobu doesn't. Shinobu put her hand on your shoulder and smiled.

"You too. I hope you enjoyed the night Y/n."

You softly smile at the both of them and look over to Itto and Heizou who were on the verge of passing out.

You wave at them and leave the bar.

The cold breeze hits your skin as you walk your way home. It is only a 20 minute walk so how can anything go wrong? Plus you still can see properly so no issues right..?

Well you start to get drowsy after 5 minutes of walking so you sit on a bench to rest a bit. You lean on the bench, almost falling asleep.

You watch the moon glow and smile. Tiny tears slipped out of the corners of your eyes. You cry.

Incoherent words slip out of your mouth. You are somewhat trying to apologize to the moon..?

But everything comes out as cries.

And apparently someone nearby heard your cries because you hear some rustling from a few bushes away from you.

It is a male dressed in black, face covered with a mask and eyes covered with a hat.

Now if you weren't drunk you would've run away, not wanting to be killed by this suspicious looking individual.

However, he somehow looked kind of familiar. But you couldn't see shit because of your tears which were blurring your fucking vision.

You see the individual walk closer towards you, and somehow you remain calm.

And now the individual was standing right next to you, looking down at you- a crying drunk mess.

Well at least you still look pretty.

The male bends down and gently wipes the tears away.

"Do you want me to take you home..?" He asks His voice is calming and caring. It made you feel comfortable.

"Yes.. Please.." You say before being gently picked up by the male in his arms.

Your puffy tired eyes try to look into his eyes but failed as the tears were still blurring your vision. But you can make out the male's eyes were somewhat blue looking- wait no black- huh?

"I'm sorry.." The male whispers and you just look confused and dazed.

"Sleep well.." The male gently strokes your hair and rocks you in his arms as he carries you.

You fall asleep through his calming voice and mutter a small thank you.

⇠ previous ⭒ masterlist ⭒next ⇢

Notes:

There might be finally someone who can help Y/n with Hikari's- our beloved dog boy Gorou!! And oh, who's that stranger that helps Y/n get home? Why does he seem so familiar? And how the heck does he even know where Y/n lives??

Summary:

You've dated Scaramouche in your high school and college years but just as you wanted to announce your pregnancy to him he broke up with you without any reason. He left you to be a single mom for 7 years. But now that your daughter has been missing and abducted for a year and you've not been doing well and out of a sudden he showed up into your life again trying to apologize for his past mistakes..?

Taglist:

@swivy123 @kichiyoshi @wwwrizchan @k1t0 @killumeo @pinkdreamerbailifflawyer-blog @samarill @xiaotopia @aqualesha @eattingshits @omoriaddict @mave-in @sketcheeee @xiaossocksniffer @elernity

[servants-hall]

Anna Madeley on Mrs. Hall and Gerald’s Relationship

In a Season 4 interview with MASTERPIECE, All Creatures Great and Small‘s Anna Madeley shares her insights about Mrs. Hall and Gerald’s (somewhat polarizing, always lovely) relationship, how hard it’s become for Mrs. Hall to leave, if there’s a future for Mrs. Hall and Siegfried, and—perhaps most importantly—if the dogs will be okay without each other. Contains significant Episode 6 spoilers

MASTERPIECE: When did you find out that Mrs. Hall and Gerald wouldn’t end up together? Did you know from the beginning?

ANNA MADELEY: No, at the beginning I don’t think there was a plan necessarily for Gerald to be with us for three series [seasons]. He came in as a character and we all loved him, and he became part of the world, so then he stayed on and became more part of the world. I think one of the things that’s lovely in the way they write the show is that they keep writing as it goes along, so they respond to what someone brings to the work, which is great. Will [Thorpe, who plays Gerald] brought this really lovely character who we all slightly fell in love with. Therefore, he had this much longer story, and those two characters just got on really well.

I think it opened up a side of Mrs. Hall’s life that no one else within that household does, so it was quite an exciting other avenue. And having a character who’s her age group, who has lived through the first World War, and with whom she can quietly knock about and have fun, go out and do things that aren’t connected to do with work—this is absolutely your friend outside of all of that. Very early on, Melissa Gallant, our executive producer, was like, “Gerald’s the first person that’s made Mrs. Hall a cup of tea.” He’s the one who’s offering to do the washing up and things. So he brings in a very different energy, a different dynamic, to that household, and gets on really well with her.

MASTERPIECE: Do you imagine that if Gerald hadn’t had to leave, they would have gotten married and they could have made it work?

ANNA MADELEY: It’s an interesting one, isn’t it? I think, what would have happened if the war wasn’t there? They’re big “if”s, aren’t they? I think there’s a world in which those two characters could have made each other quite happy. I think they were good companions for one another and had a lot in common. It’s difficult to answer, isn’t it, knowing that it had to come to an end? It’s quite difficult to think about the “what if”s.

I think that what’s so hard at the end is that there isn’t a reason between them, as such, for it not to have worked out. The reasons it’s not working out are outside obligations and outside relationships, the people that they know and love and who they want to be near. And I think the war heightens all those feelings in that obviously, his sister needs him regardless of the war, but that probably makes it all the more urgent. Mrs. Hall had to leave a family unit before and had to restart her life, so it was a big thing that she thought she could do. But it would have involved a huge sacrifice, a lot of the relationships that she’d have really had to say goodbye to. Because it’s hard enough now, isn’t it, having relationships with people who are a long way away? But then it would have been letters only, I suppose. So yeah, I think there probably is a world in which it would have been very sweet and could have worked out, but…

MASTERPIECE: Gerald said, “I’ve always known this would happen. Maybe it was never meant to be.” That was surprising. Why do you think he said it?

ANNA MADELEY: It’s interesting, isn’t it? I think it’s an idea. Because I think for a lot of people, his increasing presence in Mrs. Hall’s life and the surprise of her running and kissing him at the end of [Season 3], it’s polarized a bit, hasn’t it? Some people would like Mrs. Hall and Siegfried Farnon to get together and other people don’t want that at all; they think that would never happen. People have very different opinions on it.

But yes, I think her strength of commitment, the evolution of her friendship alone with Mr. Farnon, and her burgeoning relationship with Helen, with all of those things, I think we see that community and how much she’s needed as well, as she wants to be there for those people. And I wonder now, looking back slightly, whether Gerald had to keep prompting her to hand in her resignation. And you think, not consciously, but she somewhere was unsure. Sometimes, if you’re sure, it can be simple, but I think in this case it was very complicated.

And to me, that’s where that comes from. Siegfried Farnon has always been a strong presence, and it’s complicated because he’s her employer, as well. It’s a lot she’s giving up. For a woman who’s in a position where she’s independent, but she’s entirely dependent on her income from that job, and that’s also where she lives, it was a big thing to offer to give all of that up and to go towards something quite unknown.

I think all that uncertainty is probably what fed that comment near the end that something wasn’t sure. But at the same time, I think they love each other and have huge affection for one another. And will continue to, I think. But something about the path wasn’t going to be smooth.

MASTERPIECE: In the time that we’ve known her, Mrs. Hall has made a tremendous leap in her life. Can you talk about how Gerald was one of many who helped her to arrive at the place where she could get her divorce and move forward?

ANNA MADELEY: It’s in Season 2 that we meet Diana Brompton, in the early days of Gerald being on the scene, which has thrown Mrs. Hall for a bit of a loop—she doesn’t quite know what to do with herself. At that point, it’s been a long time since Mrs. Hall’s thought of herself in that light. She’s brought up her son and moved on, and is pleased to have found what’s become more than a job—it’s her surrogate family, and it fulfills her need to be a nurturer. She really enjoys being someone who makes that household function and come to life. I think that is genuinely where she finds the joy.

But Gerald is the first time that romantic possibility is opening up again, and she’s quite naive. She’s probably only ever been with her husband, and dating is not a world she knows terribly well. So Diana Brompton is, I suppose, a slightly shocking character for her, in a gentle way. She’s a woman who’s quite open about, “Yes, I’ve got divorced and I’m having a marvelous time.” I think knowing that’s a possibility is quite interesting for her, and then having somebody come along who makes it seem like there’s a world out there in which that could happen for Mrs. Hall…

Somehow those elements don’t all quite come together at the right time; it’s too complicated. But they open up that world, and I think it makes her realize how she can’t coexist being married and enjoying what’s become more than a friendship with Gerald. She needs to be at one with herself. It is an interesting journey for her, having made peace with her son, and then needing to be at one with herself, with her own conscience, and be okay with how she’s behaving.

So the divorce is the answer, even though it’s a difficult and a new thing to do. The law only changed in 1937 to make the grounds possible. And it’s quite exposing for her. She’s someone who took the vows she made very seriously, and the idea of having to confront the fact that it’s not then for life was a very big deal for her. But I think knowing that there was joy and happiness on the other side of it, and that she would feel better, was really important. I think Gerald’s presence in her life probably was part of what propelled her forwards and gave her the confidence to do it.

MASTERPIECE: Do you have a favorite Mrs. Hall and Gerald moment?

ANNA MADELEY: I’m not sure if there’s any one particular scene. I suppose what I think I’ll miss, both me and Mrs. Hall, is that their relationship was so about going out, walking their dogs, taking the air, having someone to chat to, and just have gentle fun with. Those scenes were always a lot of fun with Will to do because he’s so funny. We had a lot of fun doing them, but it was also just a really delicate, sweet evolution of a friendship as they walked their dogs. We had a lot of fun shooting things, like when the dog gets hold of the joints of meat in the kitchen. It was very funny. But yeah, in a lot of those scenes we had a good time.

MASTERPIECE: After the end of Episode 6, I feel like the show wants me to hope that Mrs. Hall and Siegfried will end up together. Do you think that the series wants me to want this, or do you think the series just wants me to know that Siegfried is feeling back on his feet again, or none of the above?

ANNA MADELEY: Maybe all of the above. I think it’s probably made them all realize what’s at stake, that it’s not easy to walk away. And that’s quite interesting. What it means to them, we don’t know. I know there’s a lot of chat about it. And it’s relationship where you feel that they started off as an employer/employee, but the friendship has grown, the degrees of intimacy have grown. They know a lot about one another’s lives. And Siegfried’s been a wonderful friend to her, in a way, through the divorce. He’s not judgmental about it at all and he offers to help her. He doesn’t quite know what to do, but he wants to be part of making her happy.

And that’s one of the things that’s rather lovely: not always knowing how, but always wanting one another’s happiness. I think that growing affection is there, and I do think at the end of Episode 6, there was a slight feeling of relief in the decision made. Once the decision’s been made, it’s quite interesting, isn’t it? Whether it leaves you going, “Oh God, why did I do that?” Or whether it leaves you feeling, “Okay, it’s sore, it’s not comfortable, a bit of time needs to pass, but something in you says that’s the right decision.” And I think you do see that he’s very glad that she stayed.

MASTERPIECE: We know that Mrs. Hall will be okay after this breakup, and we viewers, eventually, will be okay too. But do you think that Jess will be okay about losing Rock?

ANNA MADELEY: Well, I don’t know, because that’s going to be a big part of their lives—they’re going to be going out for a walk without their chums. I was thinking about that. Jess does have Dash now in the house, so she’s not completely alone in the home, and she’ll probably be okay. But maybe we need to find another chum. We need to grow that pack of dogs until we’ve got as many as there are in the books.

[bonesandpoemsandflowers]

I am not any less sad about the dog. I have merely discovered, over the past few months, that even fewer people than I expected understand. He was not just some animal I loved--and I say this as someone with a great love and respect for animals and the bonds we form. The bond we have with dogs is different on a species level. The co-evolution is unique to the point that dogs do gaze recognition just like we do: they read human faces in the same order humans read human faces. They understand pointing innately, as no other mammal does--chimps included. And on and on and on...

And yet it's also true that Ernesto was not just some dog, and not just my dog. He was eerily and irritatingly intelligent, which is why I couldn't have him watched by just any one. I was in more of a dialogue with that dog than many people are with their human spouses. I showed him things in my hands, offered them for a sniff. He would stop on walks after sniffing something particularly interesting, and then look back at me, offering me a moment to check out what he'd found. I would lean over and look, and only then would he move on. We did not always understand each other but also: he had those talking buttons towards the end of his life, and he used them. So I do also literally mean that this dog and I talked. We spoke. With words.

Were his favorite words "food" and "no" and "now"? Sure. But frankly, are my favorite words that far off? Are yours, if you really think about it?

Part of my frustration is my usual frustration. People write about dogs as silly and ever cheerful and I find this to be a disgustingly shallow and simplified view of dogs, actually. I do not find it heartwarming in the least. A poet writing about the ever happy nature of all dogs does not strike me as insightful. They strike me as stupid about dog behavior. They strike me as a poor ethologist with only rudimentary capacity for theory of mind at best.

People talk about dogs as harmless, as stupid little not quite people who live artlessly in their homes.

Dogs on the whole are far more complex than you think.

But it's also--oh, all my life I've been head over heels for the working breeds, the hunting dogs. Big dangerous intelligent dogs, bred for their capacity to make snap second decisions independently because you, the human, cannot possibly shout out precise commands fast enough to pin down a wild boar. You and the dog work together, but for some parts of the hunt? That dog is fucking freelancing, baby. That dog is improvising. Or take the livestock guardian dog--you're not instructing him on anti-coyote tactics. When the predators show up late at night, it is all up to that dog to figure out how to play it.

They're smart. They have opinions. Ernie was just also really invested in conveying his opinions about things. And the talking buttons aren't just about the talking buttons; the talking buttons allow you to confirm, with words, the translations of nonverbal cues. He was thrilled when he got a button for "no"! But he also didn't need a button for "no" because he said "no" very clearly with a disdainful scoff/sneeze/chuff. And I know this because when he had the button and I would ask him to do something he did not want to do, he would go: scoff/sneeze *button mash: "NO"* scoff/sneeze.

(translation: NO. no. also: no.)

But all of that aside, all that extra connection and tenderness you get from communicating in your own native tongue, and knowing this little being is making the effort to communicate with you in the way you want and understand

(even though he thinks it's stupid and he often sneezes disdainfully at the buttons before deigning to use them)

(I cannot confirm this but there was a look he gave me sometimes that I would swear meant something like: "I know that you know what I mean, and you don't need me to use the buttons but I will do it to make you happy. But it's stupid." lingering eye contact, defiant posture, more intense eye contact, eventual punchy button usage)

But ALL OF THAT ASIDE, all of it.

When most people say "my pet saved my life," they mean something heart warming and emotional and that's nice and important. I'm not knocking that.

But when I say it

What I mean

Is that more than once this dog put his life on the line for mine. At least once, I absolutely would have died. I had no answer for the size of the physical threat upon us. And the other two times I can clearly think of--my odds weren't great. Sans dogs, my odds were, like. Bad. Pretty shit, actually.

So did that dog have a bite history? Technically, yes. Did he ever get in trouble for it? No, because ultimately he had flawless target selection and he understood when someone--dog or man--truly meant me significant physical harm.

So here's what it is, right. Here. Listen.

That dog saved my life. More than once. Very literally. I mean in a flesh and blood way, an immediate way, a non-metaphorical way.

He could save me and so he did, more than once.

And ultimately, when he needed it, I could not do the same. I could not save him from lung cancer. And yes, he was 13, only 3 months away from 14. And he was a big dog, and they mostly don't live too long. Sure, sure, sure.

But the point is he handed my life back to me. And I couldn't do that for him. You know? Not all the love and worry and time and money and care I put into it made the difference. The surgery prolonged his life by a few months and his quality of life was much better for it. The chemo did nothing but at least it didn't hurt him.

I tried. Yes.

But Ernie Dog, when he tried for me, succeeded.

And I don't know how to explain the debt of that to people. I think it's too uncomfortable for people to think about so they rush to platitudes. "You did your best!" Sure. And it wasn't enough. "You did more than most anyone would!" Yes, but most people suck. Even the people who have the money often suck. No shade to those who don't. "He was loved!" Obviously. And he loved me. Thus why he saved my life. And I couldn't save his. Exactly. That's my point.

So there's nothing to do with that but live with it, and no medicine for me now besides time.

But fuck. So few people get it. And I get that there's a limit to how long people will listen to you about your dearly departed dog. But mostly I don't want to talk about it because almost nobody understands. Do you know what it is to have someone prove they would die for you? I do. It's a horrible debt even when a human does it.

It's even worse when it's a dog.

[ya-killin-me-smalls]

2BHankmos headcanons like I promised last night

had stuff going on today so didn't get to this until now

under the cut <3

it's like that one meme about dad not wanting a dog but then dad and the dog

except dad is hank and the dog is a clone

starts out as just 2BHank but Doc gets attached fast

doesn't help that Deimos has a massive crush on both on top of being a Hank fanboy

Hank doesn't care at first because it's not like him and Doc are dating dating (they are), but Doc keeps him in the loop regardless

the turning point for Hank? Doc seems happier. he's more relaxed, smiles more often. him and Deimos connect on an emotional level that Hank can't always keep up with but seeing his partner happy makes him happy

that fondness extending towards Deimos is only natural, and eventually Hank corners him in the hallway to inform him that he is now their shared boyfriend. the flustered excitement is contagious and it leaves Hank's hands shaking even though he does his best to play it cool

as with any relationship, it takes them a little time to learn how to navigate each other. they all have different boundaries and love languages but having Deimos in the mix now helps to pick up where the two were previously lacking

Doc feels less neglected with how his and Hank's lines of work keep them separate so often

Hank enjoys having someone that talks to him constantly out in the field and is always excited when he gets back to base after being gone for a while. he hadn't even realized how lonely it was out in the desert sometimes

Deimos feels secure with the two of them. both offer opportunities for growth physically and mentally while still grounding him and bringing a little peace to his chaos

conversely, Hank's quiet presence is always appreciated in Doc's lab. possibly the only person that can sit for hours on end and not say or more importantly touch anything. Deimos is allowed in too but he is On A Timer because he is Distracting

sleeping arrangements were difficult at first. they tried Hank in the middle first, which ended with one of the other two draped over his torso to reach the third by morning. Doc simply does not want to be in the middle because it's claustrophobic in the dark. and Deimos is a stomach sleeper so that on top of having two grown men on either side was smothering

the solution? Deimos sleeps partially on top of Hank and Doc. which works out great because Nevada is cold at night and Deimos is a walking space heater

there are arguments. almost always about something stupid. Hank breaks things up by just picking up whoever is getting the most heated and moving them to another room. Doc keeps a spray bottle on hand (for mostly comedic purposes). Deimos has no skin in the game and will switch between who he backs up depending on what makes the least amount of sense

they have an unending game of tag going on between them. Hank and Deimos take it beyond seriously but Doc will kiss one of them on the cheek and politely inform them they're It. safe zone is the bedroom because sleep would complicate things

there are two ways to show affection: 1) tender, gentle touches. chaste kisses. praises whispered between them like they're afraid of someone eavesdropping. warmth and safety and peace. 2) sparring matches that leave someone with a limp and the other spitting blood. over-the-top, exaggerated displays of brutality that paint cities red as an act of devotion. constantly putting oneself in harm's way to protect the other two. teeth and claws and violence

Hank likes to listen to Doc and Deimos argue about nerd things

in The Bedroom it's always a battle of wills. Deimos more often than not loses said battle, but it isn't rare for Hank to somehow have even less patience at times. Doc, unwavering, has willingly conceded only a handful of times

I can elaborate more on The Bedroom in another post if people are interested but I like to keep mature topics separate for the most part

Deimos is a clothing thief and getting things back from him is like herding cats. he's lucky he's cute

Hank handles Deimos and Doc like they're made of glass whenever they're having a moment. he'll hold their hands or caress their faces so gently and kiss them until they're flustered and out of breath

Doc flusters easily, possibly more so than Deimos, the difference being that he goes out of his way to not get caught in those situations. it's an unspoken game between Deimos and Hank to see who can get him blushing and stuttering the most before getting shooed out of his office

[courfee]

navigation post & faq

ao3 my poetry insta for fanart

Marauders fanart (tumblr)

Marauders microfics (tumblr)

Marauders fanfics (ao3)

Operation Walburga's Arbitrary No Kissing Ever Rule – T | Jegulus | 11/11 | wc:91k A 10 Things I Hate About You AU where James fake dates Regulus so Sirius can date Remus again

All My Theory Complete — M | Jegulus | 25/25 | wc: 166k a slow burn Hogwarts fic with a hopeful end.

Watch Me Meet My End — G | Wolfstar | 1/1 | wc: 2.3k Remus finds out about Sirius' escape from Azkaban

On Lies And Spies — M | Peter | 1/1 | wc: 2.7k On Halloween 1981 Peter does not mean to betray his best friend, but somehow everything goes wrong.

blindspot — G | Jegulus | 1/1 | wc: 3k turns out dogs, deer and wolves are red-green colourblind, which has some questionable consequences for the people who can turn into said animals

Something That Tastes Almost Divine — G | Prongsfoot | 1/1 | wc: 2.6k unrequited but very intimate Prongsfoot

If you ask nicely — T | Jegulus | 1/1 | wc: 1.2k James is great at flirting. What he is not great at, he recently had to learn, is being flirted with.

Borrow My Name — E | Jegulus | 10/10 | wc: 30k James is Regulus' new neighbour, who finds many excuses to knock on his door

let's walk the road backwards the way we came — M | Marauders | 4/4 | wc: 5.4k It shouldn’t have come to anyone’s surprise that Remus is the first of the Marauders to die.

high delight — E | Jegulus | 1/1 | wc: 4.7k james is scared of flying on planes, regulus makes for a very good distraction

Les Mis fanart (tumblr)

Les Mis fanfics (ao3)

Now Warm in Love — G | Courf/Jehan | 1/1 | wc: 1.0k Jehan has an awful day and Courfeyrac has an awful sweater

A Piece of Sun — G | Triumvirate | 1/1 | wc: 395 a character study of the triumvirate comparing them to the sun

Nature Assigns the Sun — G | Courf | 1/1 | wc: 2.2k Courfeyrac struggling with not being alright all the time and asking for help

FAQ

Can I translate your fics? you can, as long as it stays on ao3 and is marked as a translation with the ao3 function

Can I post your fics elsewhere? no.

Can I bind your fics? if you do it yourself by hand only for personal use and do not make a profit off of it, go ahead! (and also show me pls i wanna see)

Can I put your fics on Goodreads or Storygraph?  no

Can I use your art as my profile picture/lockscreen/... sure, if it's on the internet credit me properly though

Can I repost your art? don't repost if you have nothing to add to it. if it is merely a compliment or some excitement about my art, reblog/retweet/etc my post instead and add it in the comments/tags/etc. if you do have something new to add (using it as visualisation, art/detail analysis, etc) feel free to repost it as long as you give proper credit (link back to the og post & tag me). however, don't repost my art on social media platforms i am on when i haven't posted it there myself yet

what about fanarts you made for other fics? please do not use the fanart i make for certain fics to relate to other fics. those fanarts are gifts to the authors of the fics they're about and i want them to stay connected to those fics

Can I use your fics/art as training data for AIs/use AI to to expand on your fics/art? absolutely not. I do not endorse the usage of AI in any creative field whatsoever

[scala-ask-caelum]

Hey everyone! Are you planning anything for Halloween?

When Xehanort walked into the classroom, he didn’t expect to see it covered in cobwebs and orange string lights. Black paper bats hung in the air. Whether they were suspended by a zero gravity spell or some kind of thin string, he couldn’t tell. Strangest of all was his friends decked out in all manner of costumes, from Urd’s cat ear headband and clip-on tail to Bragi wearing a trench coat to Eraqus’s oddly familiar ensemble. Baldr and Vor sat on the second floor, talking about something while reviewing a huge pile of candy.

“Oh, Xehanort!” Eraqus bounded up to him, the feather in his hat swishing. “Happy Halloween!”

As he stared at his friend, Xehanort’s heart trembled. The resemblance was uncanny. His face grew cold, as if the blood had drained from it.

“What’s wrong? You look like you’ve seen a ghost, hahaha!”

His friend’s playful ribbing brought him back to the present. “Nothing,” he said, shaking his head to dispel… Whatever that feeling was. “What’re all the decorations for?”

Hermod took off his dog-ear headband and twirled it as he said, “It’s for this dumb Halloween party we’re hosting.”

Urd shot him a look. “It’s not dumb, it’s a way for us to connect with other students! We were gonna invite the upperclassmen this year, remember?”

“If they’ll even show up,” Bragi chimed in. “Unless you forgot last year’s fiasco?”

Hermod groaned. “Who would? But for the record, it was not my fault the banner caught on fire!”

The banter brought a smile to Xehanort’s face. “Anything I can do to help set up?”

Eraqus pointed to where Baldr and Vor sat. “They’re sorting candy and making sure the allergens are separate. There’s also non-candy goodies you can prepare.”

With a nod, Xehanort climbed the stairs to find spooky patterned school supplies scattered on the table. Vor waved him over. “Hey! We’re gonna be filling the candy buckets, but you can get started on filling the supplies bucket. Here.” She handed him a big orange container. He sat down at the edge of the table and started gathering up the supplies.

“I’m not gonna be participating this year,” Baldr told him. “Don’t want to risk getting burnt out with exams coming up.”

Xehanort nodded in understanding. That statement seemed only partially true, however. More likely, if there were going to be more people, there would be more heightened emotions and energy. Either way, it made sense that Baldr wouldn’t be going.

“You don’t have to participate either,” Baldr continued, “if you think it’ll be too much for you.”

Xehanort shrugged. “Guess I’ll see how I’m feeling around party time, and I can always leave if it gets overwhelming. I’m kind of excited to see how it turns out! By the way…” He turned to Baldr and asked the question that’d been on his mind since he walked in. “What’s Halloween?”

“What!?” Vor jumped up and slammed her hands on the table, startling him and Baldr. “You don’t know what Halloween is?”

Eraqus headed upstairs at the commotion. He clasped Xehanort’s shoulders and said, “The anniversary of his arrival here is in a few days, Vor. He’s probably never gone trick-or treating, or carved pumpkins, or told scary stories around a fire, or—”

“We get it,” Bragi interrupted nonchalantly. He’d almost finished painting a small wooden coffin. “Xehanort doesn’t know anything about Halloween.”

Xehanort wanted to bite back, but Bragi’s remark was intentionally scathing. Trying to defend himself would only make it worse. But Bragi continued, “Doesn’t mean we should be surprised about it. Wherever he’s from probably had different holidays.”

That made Xehanort feel a lot better. With the situation defused, everyone went back to their preparations.

Finally, nighttime came. The classroom, lit by soft candlelight and orange string lights, nevertheless had a jovial atmosphere. While Vidar, Baldr, and Hoder were nowhere to be seen, the rest of the upperclassmen and Xehanort’s classmates were having a great time. The music, a quiet and steady constant, helped the party’s mood immensely. Sometimes it’d abruptly switch from a calm song to a more upbeat tempo, but that did nothing to dissuade the myriad conversations.

Xehanort decided to watch from the second floor, mostly. Sometimes one person or another would join him in people-watching when it got too chaotic for them, and he’d make polite conversation about a mutually interesting topic. Master Odin sat at a table in the back of the second floor, nursing a glass of cider and reading a book. Xehanort decided to not bother him.

One of the more interesting moments of the night was when Helgi convinced everyone to get in a dance circle. Xehanort could hear shouts of encouragement from those comprising the ring while someone occasionally stepped in and danced to their heart’s content. While it looked fun, he couldn’t bring himself to join them.

Eventually the energy died down enough that Xehanort felt comfortable mingling properly. Everyone’s costumes were fantastic, even if Vor’s wire fairy wings and wide-brimmed wizard hat made her somewhat of a safety hazard. Xehanort himself donned a comfortable red scarf Eraqus had given him (“Matching costumes,” he’d said), along with his original shirt and sleeveless jacket. The smell of it made him tear up a little with a feeling he couldn’t describe as anything other than heartache.

Everyone complimented him on his “costume”, which left his heart brimming with happiness. But how could his shoddy imitation compare to Eraqus being the perfect reflection of his dream friend, down to the clothes he wore?

As he reflected on the evening’s activities that night, Xehanort wondered why he’d never asked Eraqus more about his grandfather. He didn’t even know the guy’s name, much less anything important about him. But he had the same hat, and…

No. Best not to get too caught up in thinking about it right now. Xehanort closed his eyes, trying to push away the deep unease that had settled in his heart.

[bizarre-blorbo-bracket]

Round 3 Poll 6: Leonardo the Robot from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology vs Casey Murphey from the 2019-2020 Florida Mock Trial case: “State of Florida v. Casey Murphy”

Propaganda:

Leonardo

Leonardo is a social robot who was created by MIT in the early 2000’s. He is designed to be accessible and user-friendly for people who want to work with robots but may be inexperienced. He can learn and perform tasks on par with what a toddler is capable of. He’s designed to be cute so you’ll want to bond with him. He has a whole visual tracking system to respond to emotional cues and even mimic expressions the same way a pet dog or cat might mirror you to bond with you. He can emote with a great deal of complexity while responding to human interaction and the stimuli around him. One day I was bored and thumbing through my college psych textbook that I way overpaid for because we barely used it. I ended up on a page about Leonardo, found him fascinating, and had to learn more. And then there was a sentence that absolutely floored me. It might be slightly inaccurate because this was years ago but in essence it said: “Leonardo will never know love.” Something in me died that day and I started crying over a robot. To be so complex, years ahead of its time for the advancement of technology and robotics in the early aughts. To be purposefully engineered to be endearing, and for humans to pack bond and want to form connections with it. To even be intelligent enough to distinguish between itself and other beings, to help humans with tasks while accounting for human error, and to even understand the difference between intention and action. Feats of engineering and innovation that remain impressive over 20 years after its creation. And yet. The soul-crushing pathos that Leonardo will never be able to give nor receive love. It’s a lot. It’s all deeply heavy, but also deeply fascinating. He’s definitely hit blorbo status for me, he’s such a little guy who I just have very intense emotions about.

Casey Murphey:

I have a lot of obscure mock trial blorbos but I’m going to start with Casey Murphy because I think they best encapsulate the depths of weirdness some of my blorbo relationships with these characters can get to. So to start, I have never been enrolled in a school in Florida. Or even anywhere near there. I visited a few times as a very little kid, but my schooling has been in the Midwest and the Northeast. I also was not remotely involved in high school mock trial in the 2019-2020 school year. I only know Casey Murphy because I used to be part of an online mock trial group that picked up the case a few years later. In fact, I took Casey as a witness as a joke because I had also been a defendant named Casey in the case we did before State v. Murphy. But Casey is my tragic scrungly. The autism took hold on them. BASICALLY they were a slightly “below average” kid grappling with the huge academic expectations their family had. Specifically, there was a college (Southern Coastal University) that their family had been going to for generations. But when Casey applied, they got waitlisted. They managed to make it in right before the school year started, but they were put on probation because of the short notice. A few weeks into the year, though, Casey was talking to their older brother Patrick (basically their closest friend) and they find out about a secret society called SCU Underground that their family has been in since it was founded. Originally called SCU for Change, it was a student activist group. They learn about some shady things happening at the school and how SCUU planned to combat it by holding a protest bonfire. Patrick invited Casey to the next meeting, and Casey was very excited to prove themself. Later psychological testing showed that Casey was among the most easily suggestible in society, so it’s clear that this was important to them. Here’s where things get unclear. All we know for certain is that Casey bought lighter fluid and vodka (likely using a fake ID considering they were only 18) from a liquor store. They brought those things, along with their laptop, in their backpack to the meeting. There was an argument which ended in someone named Cal Robbins storming out of the old student union building which the meeting was being held in. Then, the building burned down, and Casey came out later than everyone else before being arrested and confessing to burning down the building. The prosecution’s claim is that Casey brought the materials to burn down the building to prove their loyalty to the cause. They might have been influenced by Patrick to do it, but either way they actually committed the act. The defense’s claim, which I find more compelling as a story, is that the lighter fluid was to show that they were prepared for the bonfire, the vodka was as a peace offering considering that they were a new member, and the fire was caused by a projector overloading the old building’s power. Casey ran back in to get their laptop so they could continue their school work, and also didn’t know the layout as well as the returning members, so they came back out later than everyone else. Then they were arrested, treated poorly, and were coerced into a false confession because they were lead to believe Patrick would be found guilty if they didn’t. It’s all just so sad and angsty to me, especially seeing as they were found guilty at the trial I did so I always mentally fill in them being falsely imprisoned at the end. They just wanted to prove themself to their family, to step out of their brother’s shadow, and this is where it lead them. Also here’s my playlist lol https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2ccMwC9xV83ddZoANpejE1?si=nGtWp7MvS7WXJEWLMrBNVw Also also, like most mt witnesses, no canon gender or pronouns which is very cool of them