#had this one finished for some time now but forgor to post it

[dovalore]

carby in the cone of shame

[babiebom]

Ranking my Mechat Matches Based on how much I Like Them(currently)

A/N: this isn’t to be mean or say I hate them or anything lmao it’s just for fun since I don’t see many Mechat posts on here and I wanna post something to make it obvious that I will write for them? Might be ooc for the writings but I try my best!!

Tw: cursing, some sexual mentions, maybe a little bit of bullying(affectionate and derogatory maybe), SPOILERS (maybe)

BC: at least 5 for each

Mechat Masterlist

First the guys since I am actually attracted to them:

1)Tamura Blood

Literal love of my life I’m always thinking about him

Like it’s not even like exaggerating when I say he’s taken over 90 percent of my daydreams

Like I was never really into the whole mafia romance thing before

But I genuinely want this man to be happy

Like I know he’s a character but I want him to be happy and if I have to write a million fics just to make it true for him I will

Like he actually cares even if he doesn’t show or say it and while I usually hate it he’s just so….

Idk how to explain it

He was my first match and when I first finished his story before they updated it twice I actually was VERY upset and checked on it every day to see if it would ever be updated

Idk what happens next because I’m playing through the updates now but

If me and him don’t get a happy ending I’m going to have a breakdown

I need a happy ending with him <3

The cheek kiss is the last thing I saw and I’m so mad he cheek kissed instead of lip kissed

Slow burn isn’t usually my favorite to read so this is actually killing me

But I literally look forward to his messages every day.

NAUR I FINISGED HIS STORY IN BETWEEN WRITING THIS AN DNOW IM SAD :((((( I LITERALLY J U S T BECAME HIS GORLFRIEND

MECHAT DEVS GIVE ME MORE TAMURA KISSES NOW!!!!!!!!!!

2)Yasuda Hitoshi

Honestly he annoyed me at first and I found it fun to mess with him

But he grew on me

Like even before him and me(the character obviously) started getting along he started to slowly work his way up on my list

And now that we’re getting married and he has told me about the monsters or whatever that he had to save me from

He’s super sweet even if he’s still sorta a big meanie

I think it’s cute

Like YES I love the guy who is mean to everyone but me trope

Like yeah he’s not mean but he isn’t really outgoing or nice with other people

Like he jokes and is cute and UGH

And the way he actually stands up to his parents for you is literally swoon worthy

LOVE MY MAN MY MAN MY MAN

3)Johnny Roe

Honestly I think I skipped him the first couple times he popped up as a match

And then when I saw everyone talking about him I thought it was like

…..everyone was over hyping him

But then I got him as a match again

So I matched with him

And he’s actually so cute

And his storyline is cute

And he’s like one of my favorites (obviously seeing as he’s number three)

I now understand the hype surrounding him because I would actually kill someone for this man

And I want to fight the mother so bad

It makes me upset how he’s always like “she’s still my mom”

Like yeah but she literally ABUSED YOU?????

Like I understand completely and I know it would be hard to just turn off loving her for him

But UGH

I want permission to throw hands

And honestly not to trauma dump my mom is the same way

Like she’s not abusive but she was abused by our family when she was a kid(including my grandmother)

And she’s so fiercely protective of her and like I love my grandmother but UGH I have like a place of resentment in my heart for her because e my mom didn’t deserve any of the bad things that has happened to her

So I know firsthand what it’s like to have a parent somewhat like Johnny(my mom doesn’t have agoraphobia)

I guess that’s why I’m super fond of him? Because he’s familiar in a way to me

I just want him to be happy :(

4)Optimo Lynx

I got a crush on him slowly

Like at first I was MEH about him

But then he was a cute nerd who is studying to be a….doctor(????? I forgor sorry)

AND on the other hand he’s a superhero who has literally saved me twice

Like actually I love him

Very smart and cares about people

Like actually HE SAVES LIVES

Like ?????? It’s sad that the public can’t know his identity bc the government will be mad

And the fact I think he would hate that

But he deserves to be paid for saving people the way that he does

And studying on top of that

Like I wouldn’t be able to IMPRESSIVE MAN

wanna give him kisses

ALSO ALSO ALSO

I don’t think I’ve EVER mentioned this on my blog

But black hair blue eyes combo is my favorite

So actually he’s my dream man

I wanna give him more kisses!!!!

I NEED MORE GEMS SO I CAN KISS HIM

And maybe suck his dick if he lets me

5)Zander Echo

When I first started his storyline I only wanted to get him to like me bc he hated me

Like Oh? You hate me? You won’t after I follow this simple plan

But then he started growing on me because he calls me his little snack

And I know he means it in a cannibalistic way but it’s hot so oh well

Then he actually started caring about me kinda

And showed me the ocean in a way that didn’t terrify me (I’m afraid of the ocean)

Like actually while this is lowkey my worst nightmare

I can breathe underwater and I’m not dying or anything so it’s less scary

But I’m still scared of the ocean

It he has a castle that I live in so it’s FINE

Literally would help me get over my fear if he wouldn’t eat me

Also I wish I could give him smooches

6)Azur Blackshade

Ghost man ghost man grim reaper ghost man

Hot hot man

Actually so interesting

And sad

I wanna know how he works

Like I wanna pick at his mind

Honestly ghost types aren’t my favorite monster types but UGH

He makes me wanna write a fanfic of a ghost love interest or something

Really really like him

7)Jozef Chrobak

He was my number one for a HOT WHILE

like I think he’s so hot

And his art style is attractive

Like he’s a VERY good looking man

I do like making people like me

And the fact that he was so against love in the beginning made it more fun

And then the ex appeared and pissed me off

But we ended up together

The only reason he’s this low is because I stopped playing his route bc my own character was pissing me off

Like she’s such a bitch

Like omg he’s romantic now I hate it

Are you a dumb ass hoe or what?

8)Brook

I liked the poly aspect and he was VERY cute

And I’m pretty sure he was a nurse or doctor or the person in an ambulance and I find that super attractive

Like YES save lives papi!!!!!!!!!

And for the most part I liked the story

I could see myself having a crush on him irl

Sweet sweet man

I don’t remember much else since I finished it MONTHS ago

9)Felix

To start off Felix and Brook are pretty much equal

Like it’s a poly relationship and I like them pretty much the same

They’re both sweet men and they’re both attractive

Even though I hated that they all abandoned me

I do think it’s attractive that they all took time to better themselves and their relationship

Like it takes a lot to realize when to step back because the situation you’re in isn’t a good one or might lead to you resenting someone

They were cool

And he was a model so obviously he was hot

Love them

10)Vile Darko

Actually insane?

I like him a lot simply because he seems psychotic

Like WHO makes someone go through insane things for money or whatever

Like actually a clown and it’s attractive

Even though I’m scared of clowns

He makes it hot AND scary

Like I’m genuinely fearing for my life (in game) but I’m also like yeah if he kills me it’s fine bc he has to touch me to do that :)

11)Enzo Gomez

I was SHOOK when I realized he wasn’t just a dog man

Like he’s an actual human that was cursed

He’s a werewolf but Doberman style

His human form is attractive

And don’t kill me but the dog form is somehow attractive(maybe it’s the teeth? Idk)

And his story is kinda sad

Well sad in that he is cursed

I’m pretty sure he was a horrible person and that’s why he was cursed

And I’m glad he has become a better person because of it

12)Lan Ying

He was up at the top before I finished his story a while ago

And now he’s back but I’m not as crazy about him because I’m crazy about tamura so I haven’t played his update yet

But I do LOVE him

Like actually a dom that isn’t an asshole

And I do like shibari and he’s nice

I hate that he ties other people up though

Like mine and only mine?

Seems like a very level headed guy and that’s very attractive

Probably one of the least toxic in this list ngl

13)Eichi Hirano

I’ve never really been crazy about him

Like even though I’m a hyper sexual person his is ONLY sex and sometimes him having trouble with his hotels or whatever

So I wasn’t really interested in him

In still not all that interested :/

He’s cute though

And obviously the sex is good for my character so I guess

I do think he’s kinda nice though, so I do like him

14)Rei

I think he is the SWEETEST guy in an unfortunate position

Because his sister is manipulating him into being basically a scammer and he doesn’t wanna do it

But she gets pissy with him if he refuses

And while I know he could take himself out of that situation

It’s hard with siblings that you wanna keep in your life or whatever

Especially because they’re twins

My only problem with him is that he doesn’t have much of a spine

Like I would like him to stand up to her

But like he’s sweet and I hope the rest of the storyline is good. I kinda stopped playing it

It’s like only two dates that they have?

I don’t feel like wasting diamonds on them right now lmao

15)Dare

I think he’s hot

But in reality I would hate him

I hate playing truth or dare bc it makes me anxious and I can never think of anything

also he knows exactly how he’s making those people suffer and acts like he doesn’t

Actually manipulative

And everything is a game to him UGH

It just annoys me

The sex was cool though

And he is kinda interesting

But like the whole four horsemen thing is an ewie to me

16)Ezra Michelle

I do actually really like Ezra

But I hate the fact that I can’t romance him

I wanna romance the pastor man

I wanna give him smooches but NAUR he’s dedicated his life to the lord

Also he’s cool for a pastor

Obviously they weren’t gonna put a total asshole extreme Christian person in the game

But I do think the way he’s written is very Joseph dream daddy coded but cooler and less shitty

Like Joseph was a shitty man

But Ezra is really cool so far

He’s only this low bc I stopped playing bc I was sad I couldn’t marry him and went after people I could romance instead

17)Drink

He wasn’t really there in the storyline

Like dare was the main character I guess out of the four

Drink and dance barely showed up

But I liked him

And I think his super power of making drinks is cool

Because I hate alcohol and how it tasted I think he would be really dangerous for me if he can make a drink that doesn’t taste like ass

And was kinda nice when we finally got to talk to him

But otherwise he wasn’t really there oof

18)Social

He was more there than drink and dance but he annoyed me

Literal definition of influencer

I was ANNOYED the entire time I had to talk to him

Like can you GET OFF YOUR PHONE

I DONT CARE ABOUT YOUR FOLLOWERS

GET YOUR CAMERA OUT OF MY FACE BITCH BOY

Like his only personality trait is social media

And yeah granted his name is social

But the others were much more interesting than him

His only good trait is that he’s hot and could probably make me famous if I wanted him to

19)Joon Hwang

I don’t remember him oof

I think I liked him a little bittle but I don’t remember anything about who he is or his storyline so eh

20)Seong On

Like Joon I have no idea who this guy is even though I know I did play through some of his storyline

I have nothing to say about him yikes

Now onto the women since I did match with them!!(my storyline beliefs might be wrong because I speed through them for gems)

1)Naya Honoka

HER STORYLINE IS INSANE?

Like actually I was like OOOH a cute nurse when we first started talking

Then as time went on I was like oof she has no time to herself but she’s so nice and cute

And it was just the right amount of spicy that I was like yeah this is KINDA realistic

LIKE SHE SAVES LIVES WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT FROM HER (other than time)

Then it went into a whole hostage witness protection thing

And I was like HUH

My character in this pissed me off

Bc why when she says HEY don’t say my name call me Hannah instead

My character says Naya 400999 times like MAAM

STOP OUTING HER!!!!!!!!!

Anyways she’s so sweet and deserves love and I want her to be happy and get more breaks from working

Only thing I currently don’t like is how she literally is spending our honeymoon being a nurse

But also irl I would be okay with that bc that means I can be alone for some of the day so oof

2)Eiko Suzuki

I like her more now than I did in the beginning

In the beginning she was kinda annoying

But now I’m like OKAY she deserves the WORLD

Like not because she’s a kitsune but like she is SO PRETTY

And I do like that she’s a family girl

I do think it’s weird that she was like “I don’t want anything serious”

But wanted us to help her with everything

Like I think at this point we’re something more but they haven’t made it official

Which bothers me bc I need to know I’m the only one

And her storyline is also insane

Like WTF your ex boyfriend ruined your life and is BACK to ruin it even more

AND your family can turn into cute ass foxes and you didnt use that to your advantage and KILL HIM?

Literally just maul him as a fox and be like

OH NAUR my bf got mauled by a wild animal I wonder how this could’ve happened?!!!!!!!!!

I do think she’s cool though even though we have to help her with everything and she doesn’t think things through sometimes

I also think it’s funny that since I’m not spending diamonds on her choices that my character is a complete asshole

Like she left her to die LMAO

3)Lexi Rose

I LOVE THAT SHE COSPLAYS

like actually her being an otaku is so cute

And I’m pretty sure she got a tv show opportunity at some point I don’t remember

Like I’m proud of her

Sad that she feels like her true self isn’t very cool

Bc I really like her

She seems sweet and cool and her interests are ones that I like

Like I might not be the biggest anime fan

But I would watch several with her as dates

Like we do not have to leave the house lets snack and you can tell me all the attack on titan lore.

4)River Morales

PRETTY WOMAN

would’ve been number one had I played her recently

But I haven’t played her for WEEKS

so she went down as I lowkey forgot about her

Honestly she was cool and I love that she’s an artist

And I do like the poly dynamic

And the fact that she was REALLY honest about her feelings towards the end

Hate that they kinda abandoned me

But I do like her a lot

Super sweet girl

I think she was sorta insecure in her storyline and I hate that for her

5)Reko Lamarr

Dommy mommy dommy mommy

She’s kinda a bitch

And as a dom I feel like she’s pretty……

Needy?

Like I feel like she should just be a bratty sub or something

Maybe it’s bc I prefer service doms?

But she’s like serve ME worship ME

instead of being a cute dom?

Like MAAM tell me what to do but love on me too

She’s cool tho

Like LOVE a business woman

Get that money queen

She’s VERY stressed

And actually kinda hot when she spanks us

Just wish she was more service-y instead of demand-y

I want to be babied pls

6)Alice Young

She’s okay I guess

I’m not really into sports

And I just started her storyline

And I kinda find the sports thing annoying

Maybe it’s bc I’m not…enthusiastic? Driven about sports that I’m like????

Just FIRE HIM??????

He’s a coach not your dad

Hire someone that cares about your mental health as well as you winning

Like girl just say that you wanna just be friends until you’re done with your tournament or whatever

Like why even join Mechat if you have a whole sports thing you wanna win

Like focus on that THEN join dating apps?

Other than that she’s pretty and cool

And I think her being athletic is attractive

7)Dance

She’s not that bad at all

But we hardly have content of her?

Like we barely see her during the storyline

So she’s okay I guess

Likes to dance and so do I

The only downside is that she’s part of the four horsemen

The upside is that I found the dancing plague in France to be funny and as soon as I saw this party was like that I cackled

But also not really funny in theory

Also kinda dislike her bc she thought the people were having fun when she knew they weren’t

I think she would be fun to be around in small doses.

8)Eura Alabaster

WOULDVE BEEN DEAD ASS LAST IF IT WASNT FOR RAITAS BITCH ASS

I actually HATE her

Like overconfident people don’t really bother me

It’s just SOMETHING about her that pisses me off

Like the way she is makes me want to beat her to death with my fists

Like she’s annoying and overconfident and stupid

AND she kidnapped me

Granted I’m not against someone kidnapping me(in the fictional world)

SHE JUST HAD TO PUT ME ON A BOAT

I HATE boats

I hate the ocean

I think that’s why I hate her so much

The fact that it’s the ocean we’re dealing with

And she’s triggering my irrational fear of the Bermuda Triangle

So it’s stressing me out

I just hate her

9)Raita

I haven’t finished their storyline so if she turns out fine later sorry

But right now

AT THIS MOMENT

I hate her and how she treats Rei

Like she’s an actual bitch and I hate that my character hasn’t said so

Like actually I would’ve been like ??????are you dumb or stupid why are you such a bitch ass hoe????

She’s so mean and for WHAT

He has done nothing wrong but she acts like he has

Like he doesn’t want to scam people but this scamming ass bitch is forcing him to

And I know someone is gonna be like “he can make his own choices”

Sometimes when it involves family and staying on their good side you don’t really have a choice if you want them in your life good or not

Like I HATE HER

[edwardallenpoe]

Hullo dearest! Please tell us about your thoughts on the several cowardly versions of Sherlock Holmes?? 💛

:v

Well then. I suppose I have been forced to, woe is me.

Anyways. The ONLY acceptable adaption I will not be shitting on is Granada. I love u Jeremy Brett 😘 as for everyone else, they are COWARDS!!!!

First reason why they're cowards, being the obvious reason:

Johnlock

(pt: Johnlock)

Not letting Sherlock and John get together. COWARDS. So many adaptions and only, like, one that I know of let them be together??? (That being this amazing short film I watch ten times a day) And it would be different if they let their relationship just be and let them be platonic while still letting them have that familiar depth like in Sherlock & co., but NO, shows like Sherlock BBC and The Irregulars tease and queerbait to hell and back, and even make the one of them queer and in LOVE with the other (like in The Irregulars, John is in love with Sherlock but as far as I know, doesn't tell him because he's unstable or smt idfk) but they don't get together for one convoluted reason or another. It's frustrating as hell because it's not like there was no substance between the two in ACD/Original canon, it's not like the TJLC invented it bc of Sherlock BBC or the RDJ Adaption, no, their relationship was so deep and so real and so beautiful in ACD canon and if there is gonna be an adaption where their relationship stays the same, that's fine, perfect even, but NO, they add extra bullshit that make you think there might be something and then give unreasonable reasons why they can't be together, making you feel like YOUR the weird one for seeing something that wasn't there apparently.

Reason number two why I find most of these adaptions cowards:

Irene Adler

(pt: Irene Adler)

For some reason, every single adaption (except for my love, Granada<3) they fuck her up. Like. ACD Irene Adler vs BBC, RDJ, Enola, ect. Irene Adler are not the same Irene Adler. Who is she????? Because the Irene Adler I heard in The Scandal In Bohemia, was an upper class woman who had an affair with the king of [Forgor lol] and kept the photo of them together as collateral when he ditched her and tried to get married to a princess.

The Irene in these adaptions??? She's a trickster, a Dominatrix, an Assassin, the Lover of Moriarty, and INSANELY IN LOVE WITH SHERLOCK HOLMES. what the FUCK

Like. Please please please someone correct me if I'm wrong, but is there another Irene Adler in the ACD canon??? Who is all these things?? Because when I watched Granada, when I read the story, and now listening to the audiobook (which, off-topic, found a playlist of free audiobooks of all the short stories on YouTube with a fantastic narrator here) The Woman described in these stories, yes can be secretive and sneaky, but was NEVER fucking like RDJ or BBC's level of Irene Adler. It kinda feels like they just picked whatever character they wanted to make a Pandora out of (which is doubly weird that BBC made Mary Morstan like that when they had Irene but I barely acknowledged post season two canon outside of @gaylilsherlock 's fantastic fics, plus they almost completely left ACD canon after Reichenbach which I don't really mind, but post-reichenbach is a whole other post) instead of making their own character. So I find them cowardly for a) not making Irene at least semi-accurate to the canon besides a tiny photo (even tho canon photo was a FUCKING CANVAS- okay I'll stop) and b) not making up a new fleshed out character of her own to be a secret spy.

And uhhhh I can't think of anything else rn. Yeah:D I would complain about Sherlock & Co. But because it's not finished yet and I like how they're treating Sherlock and John's relationship and also them as their own individual characters I don't have too much to complain about, and I would complain about Irregulars but I could not get past the first five episodes. I just couldn't get into it. It kinda felt like they made a whole story that just so happened to have Sherlock Holmes characters in it. Idk tho.

Tldr: Johnlock and Irene Adler deserved better.

(pt: tldr: Johnlock and Irene Adler deserved better.)

[adventurer515]

i forgor i had this in my docs bc i was too focused on my guardian angel au… um this is based on that one angelic blood = drug fic w the straw (WOW HOW SPECIFIC) :’)) the premise was supposed to be jealous lucifer baiting alastor w his blood the entire time,, i’m posting the start here bc i still find it rlly cute but im not sure abt finishing it… it’s unedited also so just a head’s up 😔🫶

Warnings: blood drinking, drug use, mild cannibalism, domestic fluff

Lucifer and Alastor’s little understanding does not prevent their bickering. If anything, their understanding just makes the bickering even more frequent! Alastor just exists to irritate him no matter what, apparently beyond amused by his annoyance and proud at his ability to tick him off.

(“Did you really have to put my blood in a toy teacup?”

“It’s classy! Besides, Nifty gave it to me. Who would I be if I were to not use such an auspicious gift? Look. It even matches your eyes! Ah, ah, ah. Kindly please don’t melt the teacup, Lucifer.”)

Charlie thinks that their interactions are sweet and that she’s glad that they’re getting along, but Lucifer would like to disagree. They can barely stand to be in the same room apart from feedings at night where he can cling to Alastor as much as he wants, relishing in the free physical intimacy and comfort that the radio demon provides while he eats.

(“You’re squeezing my ribs too hard.”

“You’re literally eating my shoulder. If anyone has a right to complain, it’s me!”)

It makes Lucifer feel less lonely about Lilith leaving him as he finds comfort in Alastor. He knows very clearly that Alastor mostly sees him as a food source, the king of hell that lives right across the hall, and Charlie’s dead beat dad, but it’s fine. Alastor can be strangely sweet at times, even if he shows them in unconventional ways.

(“Here! I have made you some dinner. It’s very delicious, so you can stop eating those pancakes now.”

“Oh, thanks? But why?”

“Your blood sugar is too high during feedings. It leaves a taste.”)

Besides, even if whatever they have can be strange to him, Lucifer is okay with it. He knows that, in some way, he’s special to him. Alastor very rarely allows people to touch him, especially so closely (only his friends he’s had for years, even Charlie at times, but never men, for some reason). He knows that he holds Alastor’s respect and it bothers him whenever Lucifer says something condescending or doesn’t pay attention to him (Alastor likes the attention and the ability to hear the sound of his own voice, but Lucifer honestly just thinks he’s a narcissist).

However, it’s Lucifer’s blood that he’s really after. As the only Seraphim in the Pride Ring—and Hell itself—Alastor understands that being able to drink so freely from him and so often is something he won’t easily trade away. It leads to Alastor being especially territorial over him, especially when eating, and Lucifer—while fully capable of protecting himself—finds himself with a more than capable bodyguard. It also provides some assurance that Alastor keeps Charlie and the Hazbin Hotel in his best interests.

Their understanding is unconventional and manipulative on both sides, but it’s nice to have and the security is comforting.

Until that security is threatened.

((By the way, the angelic blood = drug fic series mentioned is the one with Snake in the Grass, Apple of My Eye, and the Silly Straw, which are all by anon.))

[katyspersonal]

Well- I've made really great strides in SoTE! FINALLY! Going to write down the progress in 2-3 posts in order before I forgot, but at the moment I reached the final boss gfhtfjj

1) So, I was checking remaining points of interest, such as finishing killing bosses and minor enemies! Turned out there was a furnace golem I needed to activate to fight, that was blocking Ruins of Unte! You need to throw a Hefty Furnace Pot in its opening!

So, behind it was the secret place with flowers, an incantation, and this item:

2) In fact, I've gotten REALLY good at killing Furnace Golems x) I finally adapted to the timing of jumping when they attack!! Like... I didn't even need their Cracked Tears, nor they drop much runes, nor I had anything to explore left that they prevented me from. I just made it my mission to kill all of them and I did bfgthfh

However, one on the way to Manus Metyr and one in Charo's Grave ('the red area') are only killed by getting at the high spot and throwing like 3 Hefty Furnace Pots in them! There was in fact an in-game hint to do that in one of the broken ones before entrance to Shadow's Keep, I just forgor 💀 so @val-of-the-north had to explain me XD But yes, this is why there are Spiritsprings near them and their legs don't get damage!

3) So, after all dragons and all Furnace Golems were gone from the DLC map, the only thing left was remaining Tree Spirits and big hyppos!

^ Interesting lore (dropped by the Tree Spirit in the Elac river that leads to Cerulean Coast eventually!)

4) Again, my other objective was to kill two big hippos that I remembered were on the way to the way towards Abyssal Woods, just didn't engage with at the time! I got stuck though, because I didn't see what it gave me.. so I asked Val and he mentioned Village of Flies should have been somewhere around!

Apparently it was some place I've missed, even despite the fact that I did activate the grace needed for it before! I never got other instructions, however, now that I knew there was some secret place nearby, I started to find one secret nook after other!!!

^ For example, this was in a secret waterfall nooks! I did explore that area before, just.. not enough, I guess? This is a really cool symbol of why they searched a new way! fAlLiNg LeAvEs TeLl a StOrY

5) However, that was NOT the village I was seeking, knowing nothing but 'it should be here', but I found it in another turn!

THIS IS A SURPRISE TOOL THAT WILL HELP US LATER because trust me some big lore discussion with Val followed regarding the flies sickness gfhghgj That happened later though!

I just think it is so funny how this area was actually easy to find if you explore well... and I DO explore well. For example, right now I have Scadutree Blessing lvl 18 and I did NOT look up any guide to find these! I just discovered them as I proceeded to explore every corner! Sometimes you can only find something as long as you KNOW it exists XD Psychology is hilarious

5.1) Honestly, Scadutree Fragments + Revered Ashes mechanic is one of the coolest things in DLC! Extra rewards for exploring the open world game are!!

6) Another loose end to pick was to finally challenge Dane, who kicked my ass too much earlier:

Granted, he kicked my ass again hghhghg Guess his concept of getting stronger by not allowing much interaction, let alone attachment, works just fine :p I won though

They added cool dual wield and fist combat weapons in this DLC though, I like that! Can't wait to get to NG+ to try all the new stuff in the base game properly!

7) At first, I didn't even know this seal existed:

I learned about it when I was taking closer looks at Spirit Ashes, and when me and Val were done losing it at Queelign's image I asked him what WAS he holding in his hand. ...turned out that was really easy to find, it was in the room at Shadow's Keep's drowned church with headless Marika statue after water got drained 🤡 "I explore the world well", huh?

8) Speaking of Shadow's Keep, it had a painting puzzle in it earlier that I never solved gfbgjf It gave one of the dragon hearts:

Another one apparently was supposed to be a reward for defeating Bayle picked from Florissax, that I've never gotten because I completed her questline properly! (Got her incantation, spirit ash and her calling me 'my good lord' affectionately tho 😳)

So whereas her transformation would empower Dragon Cult incantations (the zappy ones), this one empowered Dragon Communion ones (the head/claw ones received by eating Dragon hearts). Does this item imply that before, even the Drakes' hearts were more stone-like? They really are just a branch of alternative evolution from Ancient Dragons, aren't they? :p

9) And there was another painting puzzle, in that area where we learned Formless Mother lore! In the furthest part on the hill! There was also variant of Leda's armor

^ this was the reward for that puzzle!

10) For final one, I vaguely recalled that I saw an item in Belurat that I never figured out how to pick up! In search for it, I ended up also finding a letter from Leda and a Cross below that I've missed earlier, but apparently was supposed to check 🤡🤡🤡 And I did get the item, it was a dried bouquet that powers up attacks if the spirit you summoned dies!

11) So.. I really, really could not think of any other loose end to pick up. I did literally everything except for proceeding with the "actual" game. xd (If I forgot anything @val-of-the-north and others you know where to find me gfhhghh)

I killed every optional boss/enemy and I picked every item I could think of, so I had to go to the Rauh Ruins.. That was a bit of headache :^) Though looking back at it, it was fun.. Okay I'll share in the next episode post!

[neptuniadoesstuff]

Abecias Malice Ref (God OC Ref Sheet Remake)

(Edit: Had to pic the drawings a bit bcs I FORGOR I HAD THE FACIAL HAIR AT 30% OF OPACITY LIKE THE MORON I AM!)

AND HES DONE!

After a few days this gae bacon-haired moron is finished & tbh I like this new ver of him more than his original design. (If you wanna see his original design the link is here- (Plz remember the post is pretty old on here as well as the pic bcs originally this fella was actually a Early b-Day gift for my frend back when this year just frikin started.)

& yes that is some wine coming out of his mouth. (He loves his wine) & of course.... Bro is flipping u off. (But it's censored, also I originally was gonna draw a bird crossed out but then I forgor SO LETS PRETEND ME FORGETTING WAS INTENTIONAL & NOT SOME GOOF I COMMITED!) Look we a bit of somewhat vulgarity even if I'm not the person who would just curse. (But I do say byastord, which this guy is, so its fitting.)

Also Lil rewrite of his bio bcs frik u:

|| Name: Abecias Malice (aka Adder'Synn Malkovich) | Gender: Male (Trans), He/Him | Age: ?? (Died at the age of 22-23) | Sexuality: Gae | Height: ??'?? ft (Possibly was 6'2 ft tall when alive) | Enithcity: ?? (Possibly was a Rozokeen/Osmort mix when still alive) | Personality: A very unhinged & crazed individual who seem to have a unhealthy obsession with men & himself?? Seems to really like seeing oeppel die yet despises getting himself dirty to the point that he will literally start avoiding anything that has a SINGLE speck of dirt! What im saying is, hes narcissistic, sadistic, & also very lazy & wants others to do stuff for him. (Also is very racist to bird ppl idk, why though) I Occupation: The King of his kingdom of Vallenfholt (This is Godhome's hew name) | Family: ?? (When alive he had a older brother, a younger sister, & 2 parent but one of them was ded) | Species: Bloopmo (Halflett type) (Formally), Ascended God | Other: Can't seem to get drunk from the wine he always drinks EVERY SINGLE FRIKIN DAY! Is literally a rich pompous a-hole who despises the porr, homeless, & ugly ppl. Also thinks the mailmen are coming for him /hj ||

(A lot of the info here is not filled on purpose bcs gods... dont really care about mortal nonsense.)

Extras: Was originally a college student (or whatever he was when he was still alive) pretty much dealing with a pretty ab*sive father who would not respect his identity & was basically a complete snake. Although one Adder just.. snapped & ran off the campus to drive to his father's house &... kill him... But that was not the end of it, by the next day he had murdered around 12 people & injuring 2 (that being his now ex- bf & his now rival) only to be killed by his once best friend, Hugo.. When he died his soul was sent into the ring of Wrath but over the years, the regret he had turned into pride... He enjoyed what he had become... Not only that but his personality had started to shift, become extremely lustful & abnormally greedy to also having his appearance be shifted also, this was normal for a Sinner, but this Sinner was different... He risen up the rank & eventually became a God, not a well known god but a God nonetheless. Eventually going up into Vallenfholt & making a kingdom there which suited his needs. He however became so obsessed with himself that he pretty much just lost it & became the thing he originally despised the most... A rich, greedy, & selfish monster like his father was. Not only that anyone was below him was eventually killed instantly in the arena that he built for prisoners (Usually bcs he didn't like bcs of their appearance) to fight to the death in. Now as for how the hell he became obsessed with men & started to h8 on bird ppl (+ the whole thing about the mailmen coming for him... idk bro-). Now keep in might he was BoRN in a time humans (the morons from earth) did NOT come to Eeross.

Also if you wanna see the uncensored puc of the guy flipping u goofs off then here- (plz click read more but if u are offended by ppl flipping u off plz don't.)

Yeh no body pic bcs this is a friend's oc (that I made for em) but it would be VERY WEIRD OF ME TO POST THAT! (Even if we are AroAce & its a *full body ref* but plz don't ask me to post it in respect of MY FRIEND!)

ANYWAYS CREDITS BCS I H8 MYSELF! (Not really but I sorta do.... I need help-)

Character: Created by ne but belongs to a frend of mine who I'm gonna keep anonymous but they are on here (I ain't gonna say who BCS THEY ARE MEANT TO BE ANONYMOUS!)

Art: MinE

Program: IbisPaint x.

Bubs' TOS: Plz don't repost/steal, trace, or recolor my art WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! If you do, I'll take yur femur and pelvis.. SO, DON'T THINK ABOUT IT! (The PNS on my blog's pinned post clearly means "Please No Steal" plz follow that rule.) If you do post my art on anything like yur blog or somewhere else (With my permission) PLEASE CREDIT ME!

[ayoharuko]

Mha Bf Headcanons

HELLOOOOOO

I'M FINALLY DOING A MHA BF HEADCANONS YAY!!!

Sorry about that uhm yea I'm finally doing this...actually fun fact this was the one i was supposed to post first instead of the genshin one...huh...u learn something new everyday.

Also some of the headcanons might be cringe, occ and inaccurate i watched the anime and i read the manga ofc but i forgor somethings that happened since yk adhd and I don't re-watch things-....so this is kinda a blind thing for me lol

Also my writing style might be different since I'm actually using my phone or iPad to all this, mainly because I always use my laptop to do school things and for some reason whenever I open Tumblr in it, it always makes my laptop slow down soo I'm trying to avoid that hahaha.... 

REMINDER: These characters don't belong to me. They belong to Horikoshi Kōhei and this is just a work of fiction.

Anyways i hope u enjoy!

(Mha Boys pt.1)

~Izuku Midoriya~ (Deku)

~Soft/Gentle Boyfriend~

- Izuku would be the gentlest boyfriend ever. He just knows how to make you smile ya know :3

- You and him would always train together, exercise together and pretty much do almost everything together, aweee

- He's your personal tutor, I mean he’s really smart soo if you ever need help just ask your loving boyfriend hehehe

- I feel like at the first few months of you guys relationship was that he was very shy at first(he still is), But after he got used to your present he doesn't blush that often anymore. He still does sometimes, How cute~

- You both always spar together although you’re the only one who wants to, Our boy deku doesn't wanna hurt you ya know so you would have to convince him to spar with you but if it's just to exercise or practice your Quirk it's fine with him

- Deku would never be jealous except he'd be more inscure then jealous, He thinks that he doesn't deserve you. He just thinks he isn't manly enough or strong enough to protect you. Thats not true of course, Just reassure him that he deserves you and he’s manly and strong enough to protect you and his insecurities gone. 

- He thought his mom wouldn't like you but...she does! When she first heard about you and saw you at the sports festival she started to like you alot! Deku is very happy about that, Once you and her met face to face she had a bright smile on her face while inviting you to her home. Although deku is happy that she likes/loves you...can she please stop showing you his baby pictures!?(Embarrassed deku) 

- Most of the time you are the one imitating love languages since sometimes his too shy but his learning don't worry

- The first "I love you" your first to say it, When finds the right moment to say it he gets nervous and chickens out...and then goes beet red when you say it hehehe~💕

- Overall your love for each other is gentle, soft and pure. He wants to make you proud not only his mom, Because he wants to be the hero you want him to be. 

Nicknames: Puppy(hehehe) and love

Conversation with you: "Uhm...hey love..after school would you want to go to the park and have a..study picnic? Why? Well...i think a breath of fresh air is nice while studying! And we get see the beautiful park and all. ah! You wanna go? G-great! I'll..pick you up at your dorm room after classes, l-love you puppy"

~Katsuki Bakugou~ (Dynamite) 

~Protective Boyfriend~

- Now...i was caught between possessive and protective but I feel he'd be more protective, Since he wouldn't want you to get targeted by the league or to get hurt. Even if he knows you can handle yourself, Let him have this-

- If you don't know how to cook, Well no problem! He would be the to cook for you everyday! He would make you bentos that look very good so you better finish it! Or otherwise he'll kick your ass! Lovingly of course hehehe~

- If you do know how to cook however...expect him to challenge you to a cooking competition to see who's a better cook, The bakusquad's the judges of course while the rest of the class are just glad to have you both as cooks as most of them can't cook and you both are just amazing cooks! 

- Your dates are movie nights, study dates and just being together and enjoying each other's company :3

- When he introduced you to his mom and dad, He thought his mom didn't like you...but she already did! She loves you! And was questioning why you were dating her son, Which he got mad at and yelled at her for it. Seriously...you and katsuki's dad are the peacemakers and are both trying to stop them from killing each other😅

- He's more gentle and soft with you then anyone else and everyone in your class knows it, The way he doesn't yell or cuse when his around you, The way he doesn't overdo it when you both spar or train together and the way he looks at you more softly rather then a glare. Yea..katsuki bakugou is definitely inlove💕

Nicknames: Babe, teddybear, dumbass and baby

Conversation with you: "Oi... here *hands you a bento* what? It's for you dumbass...what? Just be t-thankful! Damn teddybear *red faced*" 

~Shoto~ (Shoto Todoroki) 

~Clueless Boyfriend~

- Trust me, He doesn't know shit about love. When he was probably starting to have feelings for you he thought he was just sick or it was your Quirk making him feel sick(Which isn't true of course) Then the girls started noticing this....and told him he was in love! But...he doesn't know what that means..so he asks his sister and she explains it and BOOM you guys are going out now! :D

- Since he’s VERY inexperienced you would have to be the one to initiate love languages, Good thing is he’s a fast learner soo sure enough he'll also start being affectionate💕

- He LOVES cuddling and you love it too! If you’re hot use his cold side if you’re cold use his hot side! His just perfect for cuddling~

- He always shares his food with you, He doesn't know why...but if you want his cold soba noodles..tell him and he'll give it happily🥺

- His sister, brother and his mom LOVE YOU, Now...his dad..shoto doesn't care if his dad doesn't like you cause his opinion doesn't matter. But..one time you and endeavor had a talk...and he actually said that it was ok to date his son😯

- You would always have dinner at the todoroki household, His siblings are always honored to have you at their home~

- When you first met his mom she smiled at you lovely like you were her child, and apparently shoto kept talking about you when he visits. So she eventually came to love you because of how much you give her son happiness and love, Mama Rei is happy shoto met you~

- He doesn't like sparring with you cause he doesn't wanna to accidentally hurt you...but if you just wanna train that's fine! 

- Surprisingly he was the first one to say "I love you" It left you shocked of course...but he wanted to surprise you and he wanted to tell you he loves you soo..hmm hehehe~

- Your dates are....cuddling! As I said he loves cuddling but don't worry he also likes to take you shopping! And on dinner dates, study dates the list goes on and on💕

- Shoto is so grateful to have You, He might not have experience and is new to this but...his willing to learn...just for you~

Nicknames: Baby and love(That's it his still confused about nicknames lol) 

Conversation with you: "Hello love. Would you want to go to my house again? Fuyumi said to invite you for dinner again...huh? Sure? Ah..alright..I'll see you later baby, I love you *Smiles fondly at you*" 

I'M DONE!!! 

I hope u all enjoyed this~

I actually enjoyed writing this alot hehehe, I'm sorry if there are any spelling or grammar errors.... 

But either way I hope you enjoyed~! 

See u guys on my next post💕✨

Edit: Forgor to say, reblogs are appreciated and feel free to send requests :3

[kaleidosouls]

SU reclaimed pearl rambles

im gonna use some annoying comments i got on my reclaimed pearl as a springboard for what i think could be interesting discussion because i think its good to engage with criticism/different opinions. but also if you talk to me like an asshole i want you to fuck off and i promised i wouldnt engage in that kind of stuff bc its not good for me and it doesnt Look good for me either.

so i can talk about my thoughts but not engage directly, win win. its been months but im still really fond of the pearl i made specially this art. like it coudl be better but i like it well enough. just a little header so this isnt a boring post with only text

i think like, its good to establish ground rules that like, i think most of the poor reactions ive seen towards my art were missing, mostly in bad faith probably but in case theres ppl who earnestly want to understand. actually maybe i can format it like a little FAQ even though theyre not frequent or asked lskdjg just for outlining my points. ill put it behind a cut but ill frontline w this: if youre a fan of pearl in the show, this content is not for you. youre allowed to like whatever you want and so am i. if you like her, we probably wont get along and you probably will feel very personally irritated by how i FEEL about her, so just walk away now. im not gonna engage with petty shit taht juts boils down to 'im mad you dont like what i like'

onwards to more rambling / sorta responding to some criticism

i scrolled back and i guess i sorta never have actually done a proper full explanation post about this AU have i? or maybe i have and deleted it, i forgor

why did you change pearl?

because i hate her, simple as. i went from a huge SU fan to hating watching it (i did finish) and pearl is probably The biggest reason why, as like issues with her character seep into other aspects of the show that i also hate. like i mean i Realyl hate her. she makes the experience of watching the show really irritating and miserable for me. if you dont feel taht way about her thats totally normal and whatever but no one is gonna change my experience and feelings that i had watching SU since the 1st season was coming out.; anyway answering. there is a Lot i love about SU and want to engage with, so i had the idea of like,maybe ill just change pearl, cause i wanted to delete her, really, but she is one of the main characters and she hasa function as a character that you cant just do away with. essentially im just like, some guy, who draws, coping and trying to reclaim his teenage investimetn in this show. literally its just for ME. but if anyone else feels like i do, then they can enjoy it too. if somoene doesnt feel like i do, go watch like pearl fancams or smth. like ill never be able to literlaly change the show as it is, like its happened, and its a tragedy im trying to move on from (begrudgingly)

why do you hate pearl?

the long laundry list of reasons are probably apparent in the ways i remade her lol (theyre not i can tell ppl are gonna project whatever worst bad faith reason for any change i make) but tbh the core of it is this, which is like, beyond whatever traits she has and whatever: she reminds me of my abusers. always had, from season 1, but like it became worse as the series went on. its like really infurating and upsetting to watch SU bc of her. had my abusers been a different kind of person, maybe i wouldnt hate her so much (kinda doubt tbh). like her personality and behavior are like hough disgosting!!

why did you change (some physical trait about her design)?

i dont really necessarily have a PROBLEM with canon pearls design. over the years ive come to like SU's style less and less but like, gestures, whatever. like i didnt like it or anything but its not like a bit deal compared to the actual offender that is her personality and behavior. the reason i redesigned her at all is bc like, if i hadnt, i would still be thinking about the way she is in canon all the time. like ive visually associated her like, appearance with all the shit about her thta makes me upset so i had to so she didnt look like the same person anymore, and i can try to let go of some of the hatred in my heart. like i want to think about the thigns about SU that i loved and also the potential i always saw in it and canon pearl is like, an active obstacle to that, to the point taht i cant even see her without getting like irked. i tried to keep enough similar traits so from a glance youd be like, who the fuck- is that pearl? rather than like. completely change her entirely to whatever i wanted. i do want to like, its a creative exercise. i want to try and change the things that would make me happy to see gone but try to work within the constraints of the SU we Did get as much as i can tolerate. bc like.... if the sky was the limit then at this poin wed just have to throw the whole thing away and start from scratch. like its kinda not really very salvageable, like im not rewirting SU to be like a Good show or fix Everything, its kinda too broken. im just chnaging enough so i can look at the actual show, screenshots, songs etc, and not feel overcome wtih like the grief and irriatation of how much it sucked ass. its just so i can enjoy more of it again

i dont like your redesign for (insert reason)

cool. thanks for your input. youre welcome! eat my asshole. seriously though, like, shrugs. i didnt make it for anyone other than myself. tbh im not fully satisfied with it either bc i think the SU style is kinda ugly, so im at a crossroads. should i mostly abandon the SU style? ive like, tested out tweaking things, it mightve been noticeable in screenshot redraws. drawing within the SU style is to create that coping 'oh it was totally like this haha' vibe but maybe im old enough to not need that anymore lol. like ive heard ppl say shit like shes ugly, or like sneakily trying to imply im like, got some agenda over beauty or racism etc. like whatever, think whatever you want, its not for you. go back to sucking up to rebecca or smth like i cant take the og pearl away from you still i am open for like that kind of criticism like, do i have personal biases affecting my design decisions? probably. i do try to keep aware of why im choosing certain things, but really in this case i cant emphasize enough how like, irritating it is that i have to change her design at all. like its hard to come up w smth else when the rest of the cast ahs already been design to balance off the og pearl. i probably wouldnt change almost anything if the sight of her didnt piss me the fuck off! most of all i kinda wouldve preferred to keep her hair short bc it messes up the sillouete but it makes me think too much of canon pearl so i made it long :/ i was like let me tell you my design thought process: -im gonna try to keep as many recognizable traits about her design while taking away bit by bit until she doesnt look like the og pearl to me anymore and i dont feel angry seeing her. pearl is lanky, tall, spindly, with a gem on the forehead, blue white pink yellow pastel colors, large pointed nose. i kinda tried to keep these traits while slightly tweaking their design until she looked different enough. is it a good design? eh idk. like the purpose is to make me not hate her and it does that job

now this hate comment im gonna grace with keeping it intact except removing the person bc its not about them. its like, a very stupid ass headed comment but im actually kind of interested in like,jumping off of it to ponder some things

im not heterosexual or cis enough to know what exactly wife bate means in this context so im gonna like guess, that maybe i could extract this q from that reply (also not looking like shes from steven universe is a compliment thanks)

you took away her personality and made her boring

the only thing i can assume is that like, some people must interpret the absence of an assholey personality or like abusive behavior is 'boring'. i know thats a really bad faith assumption but like, if ive written down a bunch of personality traits and you still come out saying thats 'no personality' what am i to make of that lol. based on my experience like Existing online, people tend to often call nice characters 'boring', like dude ive done it before, but i think im kinda over that edgy phase. also again, its for me and not for you so if you think shes boring, thanks for your input i dont care. but thinkign about it earnestly, i dfeintely dont want to make a character thats just no flaw and not interesting ofc, i havent done that with reclaimed pearl. that being said i havent like, probably written a lot demonstrating what i want her to be like instead of the canon pearl so, maybe ppl just are feeling lost with the lack of information.

personally, if i hear someone thinks a character is boring bc theyre not abusive anymore like, nothing of value has been lost. but characters do need flaws in order to create conflict and cause things to happen, like in a way canon pearl is like All flaw, which wouldnt be a problem except she gets away wtih all the horrible shit she did. heres some traits i want to explore with reclaimed pearl, some are similar to canon i just wanna go about it a different way: being overprotective/possessive to steven in a smothering way, projecting abandonment issues, not reaching out/communicating her emotions properly, lacking indepedence/self worth, depending on others to avoid confronting her own issues, being very passive and insecure and lacking initiative (this being the totally opposite trait that canon pearl has), stunting stevens development due to her not being ready for him to grow up and not need her anymore. and more, this is just from the top of my head. maybe thats still too 'boring' for ppl because shes not being selfish and inconsiderate enough to others so you can relate to her but i dont care :p

gosh how do i go about like, presenting the content i ahve in my head for this AU).. i cantjust remake the whole damn show. i would if i could, tbh

i have concerns about racist implications wrt (insert thing here about my redesign)

imma be frank. i dont know how to compltely 'clean up' any possible bad associations wrt pearl as a character given how like, rebecca has literally like, made her to be a slave in love with her slave owner and made it to be like, an uwu ideal lesbiab thing for most of the show until they tried to pretend no we understood the flaws in this dynamic all along and its bad actually , uhh, anyway shows over haha

ill say the main reason i changed her skintone is, bc that would be the like most instant way to make her look differnt from canon (which is vital for me for the reasons said above), and i did consider like, does this make the whole thing worse, or, ?? like, as they made it in the show, techincally All the gems are slaves to the diamonds, arent they? including all the very totally progressive poc based gems including and specially the ones who are made to be understood as black women. bruh like idk what to tell you this show is just fuckig bad sdlgkj like its just way too like, pervasive in my teen years forme to throw the baby w the bathwater entirely. and ill just straight up say it, like, im not a specialist on these topics nor do i hav ea position of authority to speak on about it. like the pearls read more clearly as slaves (very intentionally by the showrunners) bc they are meant to be subservient to gems Other than diamonds. and also bc they like fit in the stereotype of housemaid servant. like the rubies being made to just be forced to go and fight like they are slaves too, they have no rights and no like, authority to disobey or autonomy. but fsr like, slavery as in physical labor just doesnt immeidately set off ppls alarms as much as housework slavery does fsr.

i can only rly like change the canon so much and try to like, tweak things so it doesn feel as gross but i think for it to be cmpletely not insneistive at all youd have to throw away the whole show. and like i said, this isnt like me saying like im making the show good or as it shouldve been, im making it so I (and ppl who share my feelings about the show) can feel less shitty just thinking back to it. its just an exercise. im not like mass media im just one independent artist and shit will come out insensitve sometimes and im sorry but im also like, my art isnt meant to be representative and like, responsiuble for fixing all of society and racism like i actually cant do that. ill just do the best i can as an asian dude but like, if my work makes you upset, im sorry, but also just block me. like i cant please everyone. or like, even better, make YOUR take on pearl taht you feel would be better, like make the art you feel should exist.

this post is too damn long and id be surprised if anyone reads all of it but if you do, tahnk you! i felt kinda like ready to fight tonight so im triyng to redirect it from aggression to like, thinking. i cant guarantee im making new content for su reclaimed anytime soon but i would really like to, tbh

[jackals-ships]

JACKAL I must apologize I was like I WILL GO CHECK F/O LIST because I am not 100% sure which bot you ship with (<- did not care about robots until suddenly I cared A LOT) though I thiiink it's Megatron bUT sorry if I'm wrong fkdjashkj BUT BEARING IN MIND I HAVEN'T FINISHED S1...I WOULD LIKE TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR SHIP(S) 👀 and perhaps read fic at some point if you are able to find it @goldenworldsabound

(<- did not care about robots until suddenly I cared A LOT) IS AN ENTIRE MOOD THO HFKF tfp is like some sleeper cell activation code i SWEAR,,, + ur all good !! i gotta fiddle w my f/o list a lil and then repost it bc i kept meaning to make minor changes an then forgor,

BUT ANYWAYS YES !!! he's also, hilariously, one of the f/os i have a physical lil guy of despite being not on my radar as long as like garrus hf

also a read more bc i woke up Rambly today <3

he gets to sit with the ponies :} bc he canonically likes mlp at least according to the lil ask Megatron bit + there was a whole comics crossover (2 I think actually?)

breakdown + knockout are also My Besties they started out as like kinda baby crushes <- local aro can't tell the difference between Feelings even in fiction more at 11 [lighthearted] before megs came for my braincell with the fuckin. steel chair HFJ so seeing you go 👀🥰 at knocks i was like FUCK YEAH LETS GOO !!! im dropping into his work station from the ships vents like oooo someone's got a cruuuuush ooooo you wanna be all (⁠ʃ⁠ƪ⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠）don't u knocks- (jackal is once again banned from the nemesis)

okay okay but; i rlly only have one fic Finished and luckily had the foresight to post it to AO3. it's a lil older so not totally in character + canon but still silly and cute hjfkd

NOW GETTING INTO MY RED STRING TERRITORY-

when i get into something with a lot of continuities i tend to kinda? squish em together? or take bits and pieces going >:3 my city now, so the jackal x megatron ship is Primarily TFP but ive also absconded with fun movie details (like megs being i think it was 30? 40 ft tall? Fuck Huge,,,,) and also bits of comics lore/designs (holomatter is an interesting concept and im chewing on Meg's as we speak. gnawing on his arm even-)

but regardless this ship is totally my Slice Of Life Comedy Hour Chill LoFi Beats type of ship HKF like im a sucker for darker stuff higher stakes but i think this one has 0 stakes

like. like jackal and megatron literally met because jackal enjoys long walks on the beach exploring places Away from the city and Generally Away From Ppl to just sorta vibe. and ofc the normal thing to do when coming across a Definitely Alien And If Not Alien Then Like Secret Government Ship is to walk away. NOT wander ur happy lil ass inside like :0 yooooo what do These buttons do

and then when you get kicked out instead of getting squished like the bug you shouldn't come back via the air vents. again. and again and again and AGAIN and AG- until the local alien warlord gives in and is like "yeah okay this is my life now ig???" (soundwave was totally helping them btw. he likes drama 😌 and also has his own human hi adri so he can't say shit-) (also I've never decided on the Actual number of times they break it, in my brain it keeps slowly going up jus bc I find the concept SO funny. pov you're an alien warlord worried you got alien rodents and oh no NVM it's the human again. FUCK-)

it's absolutely the slowest burn too bc Meg's Refuses to admit that he has a crush on the weird squishy thing that keeps breaking in (until he's decided they're dating. and doesn't bother mentioning this) while jackals just 🥰 hehehoho big robot friend who calls me scraplet and sweetspark and sometimes puppy 🥰🥰🥰 also threatened to kill any mech who was mean to me 🤔🤔 weird. aaanyways

THERE'S ALSO a running joke in my head of that "what do you have?" "A KNIFE" "NO-" but it's jackal running off with energon bc you can't SHOW ME a cool liquid and have me NOT want to drink it !! Just a sippy. jus a lil- we'll have the hospital on speed dial pleeeeaaaase-😭

anyways tldr jackal megatron is "I'm not trapped with him he's trapped with me yaaaay :D" and "robot google; weird fuzzy feeling in spark?? how to remove weird fuzzy feeling?? robot google human exterminator near me-"

[hawkewatching]

Dark Sun (Arthur Harrow x Reader)

Chapter 2: Do You Know Me? (7,014 words)

Previous Links: Chapter 1 (Please check chapter 1 for any warnings and tags if you're interested, they are the same here)

Rated Mature for dark themes and some strong language.

Summary:

"You can walk away if you want, I wouldn’t stop you. But you won’t.”

What happens when he gets close? Do you want to test that? Do you want to test yourself?

A/N: My bad yall I kinda forgor to post, the only thoughts about this fic that I've had for two weeks is about finally finishing the current chapter I'm working on (chapter 15 hits AO3 in a couple of days, if you're waiting on that watch that space). Also I gotta say my favourite part of posting here is picking a slightly tangentially-related pic for the top, I always remember my thought processes for these chapters so they evoke scenes and ideas that I drew upon here. Iirc this chapter was written about July/August 2022, I remembering suffering from mega writer's block while working on this. I suffered so bad to write this one at the time. So enjoy it, enjoy my favourite bad bad man, I'm so in love with him it hurts.

~~~

Why is he here? He isn’t supposed to be here.

The sound of crunching glass immediately strikes fear into you, even if it is only momentary. No amount of exposure to it can make you used to it. Even though you don’t negatively associate the presence that accompanies it, something about how it sounds can never be spun in a positive light in your mind.

You had been previously leaning over a cardboard box of your belongings, packing up and ready to move out of the small flat that you’d previously called home. When you looked behind you, following the sound, you saw a sight that you knew to expect but hadn’t quite prepared for.

Harrow was leaning in your doorway, still holding on to that cane as if it helped at all. He looked exactly the same as when you’d first met him a few days prior, right down to the clothes. You hadn’t forgotten a single thing about him, and you should have welcomed the familiar sight, but something prevented you. You couldn’t remember if you’d ever told him where you lived, and he certainly hadn’t been invited.

You raised an eyebrow, suspicious of his sudden appearance. “Are you going to help or are you just going to watch?” You asked, only half sarcastic.

He tilted his head. “From my understanding it appears that you’ve already done most of the heavy lifting.”

“True, I could have done with you randomly showing up here an hour ago.” That was fully sarcastic, and you looked away from him to close up the box you were handling.

He began to take some steps forward, and you tried to hide your own repulsion to that sound that always followed him. “I apologise, I just wanted to oversee things.” He sounded genuine, but at the same time a little distant, noticing that you still looked at him with distrust.

You narrowed your eyes, watching him as he now stood next to you. The way he looked down at you made for an unintentionally intimidating presence that you refused to back down on. You tried to hide your feelings with a scoff and an unenthused smile. “What’s that supposed to mean? I wasn’t going to bail.”

His smile, which was supposed to be reassuring, only served to further stoke your rebellious flames. “I didn’t think you would.”

Finally, you became serious, unsure of his exact intentions. “I don’t need you to worry about me.” You insisted, but something didn’t seem to convince him.

“It wouldn’t hurt to have me worrying about you.” You were unable to hide your confusion when he put a hand on your shoulder, but it was only momentary when one of his damned smiles began to put you at ease. You didn’t mind him doing that, even if you didn’t understand it.

You could only look at him, not knowing how to reply to that. You didn’t really know what it meant, and didn’t dare ask. Given that context, you somewhat appreciated his unexpected company.

He leaned in and moved forward, with your response immediately being to brace yourself for whatever was to come. However, you were surprised to see him go around you instead. The rasp of his voice was next to left ear.

“It’s not too much further, but don’t get lost, alright?” Harrow asked. The question sounded almost playful, but you didn’t know how to respond to the game.

Pinned to the spot, you didn’t dare follow him with your gaze, but his sounds more than indicated him circling around you. He’d said his part, and you saw him again when he’d finished that lap, returning to where he had been a moment before.

He looked at you with a warm stare, a smile only just present. Your nervousness began to disappear at the sight. For once, you felt able to lower your guard. It felt safe.

What was this? Trust? On both our parts?

You only wished to know why he would do all of this for you, but as always, he was a total mystery. A mystery you hoped this new chapter of your life would solve.

***

Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap.

Anticipation was already eating at you as it was. That was enough torture for you. You didn’t need the addition of those sounds, which you thought you had escaped, getting to you through the walls. Not even the source being in another room could prevent you from having to experience it all over again.

It had been a week since you’d settled into this place. Your experience so far had been pretty good. Harrow’s promises had turned out not to be empty. Although you were still adjusting, you had found this environment to be welcoming, and the people rather kind. They weren’t like their leader at all, they all seemed… normal. When that realisation hit you, you didn’t feel so out of place anymore, and you had found great comfort in that.

Now, you were waiting in a hallway, the hot sun beaming through the windows straight onto you, not helping the already awkward situation. Directly across from you was the room that Harrow was supposed to be in. Well, there was no doubt that he was in it. You had been told that he wanted to see you, and that never really boded well.

You had already seen him a lot, but never in a context like this. Usually, he came to you. He would do that a lot, actually. You never objected to his company, sometimes you welcomed it. If you were alone, he always made sure that it was never for long. He didn’t seem to do this for other people, and they had noticed. No one had a definitive answer to explain that.

Something about the way he is just doesn’t sit right.

He would just sit with you and listen, but the conversation was awkward. He never talked about himself, and you had a hard time talking about yourself, so it mostly boiled down to talking about whatever seemed to be happening on that particular day. It wasn’t exactly riveting, but it was something? Regardless, you were running out of ground to cover. Something had to give. You knew there was something deeper, he had to have a motivation, but that was totally unknown to you.

He had stopped moving. You sighed loudly, trying to fill the eerie silence with something else. The moment was short-lived though, and almost as quickly as it disappeared you could hear him walking again.

Before you had time to process that, there was a clicking of a lock and one of the large, wooden doors that served as the room’s entrance opened a crack. Through it, you could see half of his face, and half of a warm smile.

“You’re here. Come in.” His enthusiasm surprised you, and you could tell he was happy to see you. You just weren’t sure why.

Once he had finished speaking, he just watched you, waiting for your move. You followed him, deliberately cautious. When you got close to the door, he pulled it open for you, revealing a large room that, while spacious, felt claustrophobic with its low-hanging lights and various items stacked up against the walls from top to bottom.

Harrow was shuffling towards the back, where a corner was stacked with sturdy, waist-high boxes. Littered there were various unknown, shiny objects. Drawn to those like a crow, he didn’t pay you much mind for a moment. You’re unable to find the same fascination, but everything around you looks alien to you.

You looked away from him for only a moment to try to better understand your surroundings, but right on cue, he opened his mouth, immediately making you whip your head back around in his direction.

“How are you taking to this place?” The question tumbles out of his mouth innocently. He didn’t even look at you, but somehow, you felt as if he was still staring right through you.

You tried not to let it get to you. “It’s good.” You replied.

He gives a satisfied hum, and for a moment, you’re tricked into thinking that would be all he would say on the matter. Before you can get comfortable, he takes a sharp breath that sets the tone. “Is it… helping?” He stares you down, hiding an eagerness for your answer. The pressure was on.

You recognised the way he looked at you. You’d seen it before. He’d looked like that in your first conversation, you remembered the flash in his eyes that he’d tried to hide. The ever-veiled threat.

Don’t be honest, tell him everything is fine.

You ignored the pleas of your own mind. Dismissed it as paranoia. You could trust him, or at least, you wanted to. For better or for worse, he had compelled you to be honest, but in your shame, you couldn’t look at him. “It’s too soon to say, I think.”

When you picked up the courage to glance his way again in the silence that followed, you could tell that wasn’t what he wanted to hear. His unblinking stare, the way his hands seemed to grasp tighter around that cane, all set off your mind’s warning sirens. But nothing on his expressionless face portrayed that. It appeared almost as a blank canvas, preparing to paint whichever response he deemed most appropriate.

Whatever plan he had, he’s changing it.

Your curiosity got the better of you. “What is all of this, anyway?” The question slips out of your mouth before you have time to fully evaluate the situation, your eyes darting around the room at all of the strange objects.

“Just items I’ve collected in my research.” He replied coolly, picking up an object that flashed gold in the light so brightly that you couldn’t quite tell what it was. “Most of these things are dead ends, but I find there’s no harm in keeping them, just in case.” He handled it with great care, carefully placing it back down. It didn’t quite match with the disinterested tone of his voice.

“And what about all of those?” You pointed to the back wall of the room, where some large - your first instinct was to call them boxes - but they were much more elaborate than that, were shoved into the corner, as if hidden. The longer your eyes lingered on them, the more you were able to discern that their size and shape seemed disturbingly human.

That idea didn’t make you totally comfortable, but you kept a cool head. Your better instinct, starting to understand his antics, knew to give him nothing to work with. You couldn’t let him have control of the game.

He didn’t even look at the subject of the conversation. His eyes instead locked with yours, the corner of his mouth twitching with indecision.

I’ve got you.

You could tell he knew how to pick his battles, but in choosing not to respond he had also admitted defeat. You had managed to call him out, and while that was a small personal victory, it was quickly followed with the realisation that your first examination must have been correct, and the implications were staggering. You could almost respect his ability to always come out on top in these conversations, if you weren’t the one always losing.

Under the weight of that realisation, your voice became hesitant. “Those aren’t what I think they are.”

Finally, he found his smile. “That would depend on what you think they are.” Now you’d given him something. Harrow leaned forward on his cane, completely calm. You thought you had caught him, but the indifference hadn’t shifted one bit. “I didn’t kill any of them, you know.” He stated.

You scoffed with sarcasm. “Yeah, sure.”

He wandered over to the bodies, brushing a hand over the nearest one. “You’d be surprised how many ancient Egyptians were buried with objects of immense value.” His words were a little quieter than usual, as if his mind was distracted.

You dare to take a step closer, standing next to him and looking down at his hand, now tracing the shape of what you assumed to be legs. “Went for a spot of grave robbing, did you?” You felt daring, confidence boosted by your minor win, and sought to further touch a nerve in him, but it didn’t seem to have any effect.

“I suppose you could say that. It made for some fascinating adventures, really.” He gave a small smile, and looked sentimental. You assumed that the thoughts that had made him distant in the moment were driven by nostalgia, and chose, despite the temptation, not to judge. He seemed to snap back into reality, a much more focused gaze now directed back at you. “But I’m past that point now. There’s not much exploring left to do.” He said that with real conviction, leaving you with no more questions.

The way he looked at you made you feel awkward, and you continued to apply the sarcasm. It was the only way you could express your distaste. “That’s great, I’m sure those dead people would prefer to remain undisturbed.”

You almost envied his ability to take all of the criticism levied at him without as much as a complaint. You had insulted just about everything he stood for and he didn’t seem to care one bit. He couldn’t be swayed.

That can only mean that he hides a terrifying level of commitment. You should be afraid of that.

You ignored your own thoughts, dismissing your own imagination as just overactive. You knew this already, yet you were still here.

Harrow was, as you knew him to be, unflappable. You could see the side of his face, and a smile creeping up it. “It’s all for a good cause. After all, if you try to hide something, it will always be found, eventually.” His face darkened during his last sentence, the instant seriousness putting you on edge. He turned, slowly but suddenly, and caused you to flinch as his intense gaze sliced through you. “They simply had it coming.”

You felt thoroughly intimidated, and tried to deconstruct his possible motivations, for you knew he’d wanted this response from you. It seemed like a reminder that you were playing with fire, and you were so, so close to being burnt.

Does he know something? Who am I kidding, he ALWAYS knows.

You suddenly began to remember how you even ended up here. Of course he wanted you for something. “Why did you want to see me?” You asked cautiously.

He seemed amused by that, as if you should have known the answer yourself. “I just wanted to talk. Properly. We haven’t been able to do that just yet.” Harrow tilted his head. The friendly sincerity that had followed him on the first night you’d met him had properly returned.

You gave him a look of confusion. “It’s not like we haven’t spoken-”

“Speaking and talking are two different things.” He cut you off, and while glancing down on you in a condescending manner, his tone doesn’t change, making for a creepy contrast. “You don’t seem very interested in doing the latter.”

Is this… impatience?

That seemed out of character for him. Curiosity began to get the better of you again, even though you seemed convinced that it would assure your downfall. You had a desire to outplay his games, but the line between beating him and playing into his hands was becoming increasingly blurred.

You gave a crafty smile, but spoke as if disinterested. It was the kind of contrast you could pick on, so you had no doubt in your mind that he had observed it too. “It’s not that I’m not interested, it’s that I don’t know how to.”

And you fucking scare me.

“Well, how about a lesson?”

The way he looked at you and the way he asked made him sound so innocent, but the demand was hidden under there. You couldn’t say no to him, even though you knew you should. It didn’t seem like an option.

“What would that be?” You asked, trying to suppress your feelings,

You couldn’t take his eyes off of him as he began to approach you, locked in place. Whatever was coming, you had to accept it. This was what he had wanted.

You only hoped he wasn’t asking too much of you.

He scoffed, a small smile forming. He acted like the answer was obvious. “You have to learn to accept help.” He leaned down a little to get on your level. “I am trying to help you.”

Perhaps it was the way he looked at you, that stare that always made you nervous. Or perhaps it was that he had all the energy of a teacher scolding a child. Something about his offer didn’t work for you. You gritted your teeth in annoyance. “You’re not doing a very good job of it.”

Your comment amused him, but he only lets that be known for a flash before he turned more serious. “That’s because it’s a two-way street. If you give me nothing, I can’t give you anything either.”

“What do you want from me, then?”

You expected his intentions to be suspicious. Every time you felt like you could trust him, he did something to change your mind, and you could tell he was doing all of this because he wanted something. There had to be an ulterior motive.

He gave an exasperated sigh, as if your questioning had tired him out. “I just want you to talk to me. That’s all I want. Nothing else.”

You couldn’t bring yourself to reply, only watching as he stared right through you, as if waiting. For the first time, you weren’t objecting to his games out of choice, but out of confusion, totally clueless on what your next move should be.

Your silence must have surprised him, as he scoffed, but the advance warning did not prepare you for the volume of the chuckle that followed. “I want to know how to help you, I want to know how to fix your problems, and I want to see you more.” A relieved smile formed after his words.

He means it.

Despite your racing mind, you didn’t give away any emotion, and forced something, anything out of your mouth. “Why?” You asked softly.

Harrow looked towards the window for a beat, head tilting as he seemed to think. When the words came to him, he faced your way again, and you observed that he’d dropped the seriousness and the distance. There was something warm about his energy. He no longer looked past you, but at you. “Because letting you go would be a waste. A waste of someone good. Not just for the world, but…” He let out a long, drawn-out sigh, purposefully delaying the rest of his words. “For me.”

Suddenly, everything began to make sense. Somehow, this outcome had never crossed your mind. You hadn’t expected it. Perhaps you’d thought too much of him.

He’s not helping me, he’s helping himself?

You couldn’t help but wonder if all of this had been for his own ends. That you had simply been used. All of the promises he had made to you felt hollow. It made you feel sick. This was a trap.

In your confusion, you hesitated before getting your words out, nearly choking on them. “Do I really need to be here, or did you just want me to be here?”

The way he looked at you hadn’t changed, but in a new context he still appeared as distant as ever, even with the still-present smile.

Fuck! How does he feel nothing? He has to know what he’s done.

He straightened himself up a little, looking down on you. “That’s entirely up to you. You can walk away if you want, I wouldn’t stop you. But you won’t.” The smile seemed to more naturally fit to a newfound smug confidence, certain that he had read you like a book.

His conviction in your own feelings disgusted you. “You don’t know me.” You scowled.

He hummed, almost in agreement. “I know all of this is helping you.”

A tidal wave of emotions was overcoming you, too many too quickly to decide on one. It was the opposite to Harrow, calm and firmly decided on whatever that strange mind had settled on. You began to raise your voice: “Do not pretend to know me. How do I know you’re not acting selfishly? I-”

Knock, knock.

You gave a loud sigh, the knocks having completely ruined your train of thought. You could see, as always, that he was giving you nothing. Even now, when you’d tried to make an impact, you couldn’t break through his defences.

There’s a flash of irritation in his eyes at the idea of being interrupted, but as soon as a woman appears at the door, another disciple, it disappears. He appears to immediately understand the importance of whatever is to come.

“We just heard back from our contact in the Alps. They’ve agreed to your terms for the exchange.”

“That’s great news. Thank you.” His smile is warm and genuine, but the woman seems to register a subtle indication that his matter with you is private and swiftly leaves. He stared at the door, left ajar, his mind far more focused on the news he had just received.

After a beat of no response, he slowly approaches the door.

Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap. Crunch, tap. Cr-

Harrow slammed the door shut, turning to you now with a different expression. His eyes narrowed and darkened, and his offence was clear. For a moment, you felt something shift in the air. For the first time, you truly felt his power. You didn’t know the extent of it, as far as you’d seen and heard, it was stronger than it seemed, and the mystery of that was too much to bear. Anxiety suddenly began to eat at your stomach, afraid of his next move.

“Don’t assume I’m acting selfishly.” He growled, but in the span of a breath he had recomposed himself. All of a sudden his expression shifted in the blink of an eye, turning distant, unoffended. The same as usual, especially when you felt those ever-analytical eyes once again staring you down. He was far too good at hiding his feelings, but you wished to never find out again what he could possibly be thinking. He continued softly, thinly veiling a condescending tone: “That's almost insulting. I would never bring you into something that I didn’t think would be good for you.”

In that moment, you realised why he didn’t seem fazed at all by your negative reaction. Somehow, you were still playing his game. This is what he had expected. You were cornered, at this point, and the only solution left was to follow your heart, hoping that would help you escape.

He knows your heart.

“Forgive me for the insult.” You said sarcastically, not caring how he would respond, but still observing his unblinking gaze that didn’t even seem to register your comment. It unnerved you, and you folded your arms in an attempt to preserve your deteriorating defiant act. “I wouldn’t have that problem if I actually knew who the hell you were.”

He tilted his head with a smile, your words seeming to have the opposite of their intended effect on him. “I see how it is. It’s a matter of trust. That’s a starting point.” He sat down across from you, fingers stroking the head of the cane as he held it between his legs. That seemed to be a subconscious act, because his gaze did not once break from you. “Tell me, why don’t you trust me?”

You hated how genuine his question was, because you had long learned the lesson that always, somehow, Harrow already had every answer he ever needed.

“You already know.” You spat.

“I might.”

You gave him a nasty look for that comment, your contempt too great to suppress.

He responded to your stare with one of his own, but as per usual, he was seemingly immune to your efforts, continuing on as if your gaze hadn’t interrupted him. “I want to hear it from your perspective. Lay it all out.”

You raised an eyebrow, finding yourself leaning sideways on a table, sick of standing. “Only if you do the same.”

He paused for a moment, taking the time for a slow blink. You imagined that the gears of his mind must have been turning at your proposal, but his face did everything in its power to hide that. The silence betrayed the truth, though. With a deep breath and a shuffle as he straightened himself up, almost mirroring you as he leaned forwards and balancing on his own cane, he had prepared his answer.

“That seems reasonable.”

I didn’t expect that.

Even though you were surprised, you’d already rehearsed in your mind what you’d say to him. You’d been doing that for a week. You tried to take a trick out of his book and not betray that you had to think a little, though. With him, you knew that one wrong word and he’d play around it so expertly you’d never get this chance again. “Alright. I don’t trust you because I don’t understand you.”

He tilted his head in an almost adorable display of curiosity. “What don’t you understand?”

“Anything.” Your frustration started to come through as you spoke. “Why you are the way that you are.”

For a moment, he glanced away from you again, something you assumed to be a tell when he didn’t quite know what to say. When he spoke, any sense of uncertainty disappeared. He didn’t appear to be capable of seeming unsure. “There are some things in this world far beyond any of us, and if one was to cross paths with such things, they could break you in ways most of us could only imagine to be possible. For me, that happened long before all of this.” Although it was out of your field of view, you could hear him softly tap his cane against the wood.

You took a moment to process his words, suddenly brimming with curiosity. “What do you mean?”

He gave a dry chuckle. “You’ll probably find it unbelievable.”

Despite everything you had seen, your mind’s first instinct was to believe that he was simply making excuses, trying to dodge the question. He hadn’t been open about it in the past, which had only made you want to know more. There was something hidden in his heart that he was teasing you with. You snorted, dwelling on his words again. “Try me.”

This time, there was no telling moment of pause, his stare cutting right through you. “I was once under direct servitude of a god, who used that position to abuse me. He broke me completely, then left me all alone to pick up the pieces.”

His bluntness on this topic surprised you. This was a lot to throw in so quickly, and it seemed like he knew that.

“I was stuck, trapped fighting a worthless cause for years, all while the voice inside my head tried its hardest to bend me to its will. I was forced to commit unspeakable acts of violence, all in the name of real justice.” He spat those last words, face twisting to one that appeared to be of genuine disgust and pain. For the first time, the Harrow you knew looked somewhat vulnerable. “It never was. Hurting the people who deserved that after the fact never stopped any more pain from being inflicted.”

Guilt. You felt his, and the sudden appearance of your own. He had this appearance of something untouchable, and while you always knew it to be a carefully crafted image, it had achieved its intended effect. Hidden under all of that was something that was hurting a lot. More pain that you felt you could possibly understand. There was a real, deep history here. Even with how crazy it all sounded, you could tell by the way that he felt that it all had to be true. And that meant…

You had to stop yourself from speaking while your thoughts caught up, looking right at him as you saw his face slowly recover from the feelings that had taken over it before. “Everything this group believes…” These tales of gods aligned with everything you’d been hearing, and you knew what that meant. “It’s all real, isn’t it?”

“As real as you and me.” He found a smile again, standing up. His feet shifted on the glass, which must have brought some pain, but he didn’t show it. ”I knew you’d come around eventually. We have an opportunity now to correct our mistakes.”

As he took another step closer, you watched him carefully, eyes narrowed with suspicion. “I think you mean your mistakes.”

“No. We’re all guilty.” He replied with total confidence, his voice once again shifting into something more serious. “Why are you here, really? You’ve made mistakes, haven’t you?” His questioning was a bit too antagonising for your tastes.

You didn’t say anything, knowing full well that you were both aware of the answer.

“For some of us, it’s not too late to walk a better path. You’ve got room for a second chance.” There was something reassuring to his words, and despite everything about him, you had no reason to doubt that particular statement, but he cut off any chance for a response with a sigh. “For myself, it’s not as clear. But you never know if you don’t try, do you?”

The talk of himself piqued your interest again. “I don’t get it. Why claim to fight all evil yet preach about second chances? If your actions were so unspeakable, why do you go unpunished?”

For a moment, he doesn’t give any reaction at all, seemingly thrown off by the question. When the answer comes, it appears with no hesitation. You can tell he’s pondered this question before. “I do punish myself. And on judgement day, if I am deemed unworthy… so be it. I accept my fate.”

He shifted his weight and you heard it. His punishment. The fanatic part of him was showing, you knew it had been hidden somewhere. This talk was insane, and served to remind you why you had been so apprehensive.

He’ll try to make you forget this.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you failed to respond, giving him the green light to not only continue with his words, but to approach until he was standing right next to you. “I’m willing to do that for the people who deserve heaven on earth. All that is required of you here is to be ready and waiting for that day. If you make it…” He put his hand on your shoulder, his warm touch surprising you. “It’ll be a little more worth it.”

There it is.

You felt doubt wash over you, refusing to believe that he spoke the truth. Not only because you didn’t hold yourself that high, but because you found yourself distrustful of his words. They were too kind, especially coming from him.

You could only look up at him, mouth agape. With a sigh, you composed yourself. “I doubt I make that much of a difference.”

He leaned in closer, an advance you did not reject, until his face was close to yours. His watery eyes hadn’t been this close before, and they looked at your own instead of through them. “You undervalue yourself.” He told you almost in a whisper, trying to be reassuring.

His words almost worked, and you giggle at the thought of them being true. “You overvalue me.”

He finds your reply entertaining for a moment, but his face quickly drops, and you can feel a finger or two in your hair. “Maybe. But you seem to think that you don’t matter, which simply isn’t true. People do value you.” He spoke with utter conviction, enough to make the back of your mind believe him.

“And who would those people be?” You questioned, hoping to hear what you knew he was thinking from his own mouth, but when he didn't respond, you realised your mistake. He doesn’t need to say anything, for he knows the same thing that you do: Your question has already been answered.

You took half of a step backwards away from him, and he follows your cue to break away. His face flashes with concern for a moment, and you didn’t miss it. You decided to make your question more specific. “Why do you care so much about me?”

He doesn’t think about his response for very long at all. “That’s a question I don’t know the answer to.”

His bluntness greatly surprised you. Him not appearing to know something surprised you more. “That’s a first.” Your sarcasm is kinder this time, unable to help yourself at making a jab that wasn’t necessarily deserved in your mind.

Of course, he doesn’t care how you’ve spoken, just that you have, and he takes a moment this time to get his words right. “I’ve spent a great deal of my life keeping people at a distance. I have a track record of hurting people in every way imaginable. I think perhaps I’m finally at the point where I’m no longer afraid of that.” Just like when talking about his past, there’s something shockingly sincere in his voice.

You caught onto his wording, hoping that he hadn’t thought that through in the moment. You knew that was a naïve thought. That realisation causes you to betray your concern. “You don’t hurt people anymore?”

“I don’t hurt them as much.” He replied callously.

That does not instil confidence. You wanted to chastise him for such a mindset, or even ask for elaboration, but your first and foremost thoughts are self-centred. “What about me?”

An opportunistic glint in his eye appeared after you asked. Before he even began to speak, you know that this is a moment he had been waiting to pounce on. “That brings me to why I summoned you here. I need to test you.”

“Test me how exactly?” You weren’t sure why you asked, because you already knew full well where he was going.

“The same way that I’m sure you’re familiar with.” The words tumbled out. He seemed much more focused on you, eyes glancing up and down over you. When his gaze calms down, he continues. “You were paying attention before, weren’t you?” He may have smiled, but you couldn’t tell if that was a joke or a threat.

For better or for worse, you remembered everything. “You said you didn’t force this on people.” You replied concernedly.

The proof that you had been listening previously strengthens his conviction. “Sometimes there are exceptions. And I need to know.”

“You need to know what?”

“If I’m right about you.” You could barely hear his words as he took a step closer, half overcome by nervousness and half because he had practically whispered that. He gave you a reassuring smile, but it only appeared for half a second.

You felt frozen as you felt him grab onto your wrists. You had been too busy watching his face to watch his arms, and from the point of contact you vow not to make that mistake again. He was surprisingly gentle and delicate with you, even taking great care to place the cold and strange-feeling cane between your own arms, but you knew from the way he looked at you warmly that this was out of a desire to make you feel comfortable with this process, almost as if he foresaw that you'd be afraid. You wondered if he was like that with everyone in his clutches. Out of pure discomfort, you couldn’t look back at him-

“Don’t look away. Look at me.” There’s no warmness left in his voice. It’s a demand.

You hated how he had basically read your mind. Confused, you felt you had no choice but to obey him. Something was happening, out of the corner of your eye there was movement from his arm and you could feel that cane move in some strange fashion, but his grip on you gradually tightened, and you didn’t dare to disobey him.

After what felt like an eternity, you felt his hold loosen. He breathed a sigh of relief, and then, all of a sudden, before you could react, he went in for a hug. You especially felt the one arm nearly wrap around your next, and his hot breath directly in your ear. “I apologise for all of that. For a moment, I didn’t trust my own judgement. But everything I believed before was right, there is a hope for you here.”

“So I passed?” Your question comes out shakier than you hoped.

“Yes.”

“What would have happened if I had failed?”

He gave you a condescending scoff, and you felt mocked for asking such a question. That was irrelevant to him. “Let’s not dwell on that. You are safe now, and no one will hurt you anymore.”

“Not even you?” You found some of your confidence again to force that question upon him, and you can tell when his smile breaks that it has forced him to think.

Something about all of this does not put your mind at ease. Maybe it’s the fact that you’ve never seen anyone fail the test, or maybe, you remind yourself, it’s because you are knee-deep in the clutches of a cult. Those thoughts are small compared to the main idea running through your head, though.

If I failed, I wouldn’t fit in his standards. I would have to die. He could have killed me. Could he kill me? I’ve never seen him kill anyone. Does he have that in him?

Harrow put a hand on your shoulder again. You now noticed that he seemed to do that a lot. “I will protect you myself. I know now that you’re absolutely worth it.” He had leaned in a little while he spoke, just to add a little more reassurance. You hope desperately that his protection is as valuable as his power. He certainly acted like it was.

You feel a finger brush up against your neck, and the sensation shakes you to your core. In that moment, he feels closer than he ever has before. There’s something so casual in his act, he either didn’t notice this move, or he pretended he didn’t. You already knew it was the latter.

“I hope that we’ve finally cleared up some confusion.” His gaze follows his hand, wandering around your neck until it locks back into your eyes. “Do you understand me?” The question, unlike his last few words, isn’t so kind. Once again, it’s a demand.

No.

“Somewhat.” You lied, knowing that he would not take the truth for an answer.

The way he looks at you suggests that he’s not entirely convinced, but for some unknown reason to you, it doesn’t bother him. “That’s progress. I want…” He pauses for a moment, and you immediately began to fear that a sincere moment was coming. ”something here. I want a deeper kind of relationship. Something that’s more than what we have right now.”

“More than strangers?”

You didn’t intend to be rude, but you didn’t regret your choice of wording. He was, in essence, a stranger that you saw a lot. No matter how much you talked, he was always so distant, as if he wasn’t really on this earth the same way you were. You were never going to be friends, but there was a space to be something else and he’d capitalised on it.

You could tell that he found your response to be harsher than he expected, but he didn’t seem too thrown off by it. You expected that he saw it coming, because he always just knew. The smile he gives almost seems to suggest that he found that funny, but you don’t know what a smile from him means anymore. “More than that, yes.”

In your amusement, you were able to smile yourself for the first time in a while. “I don’t know about that.”

Your own happiness seems to touch him, and continues with his warm words. “I asked you before to take a chance, and you took it. Right now, that’s paying off. All I’m asking you now is to do that again.” In the beats between sentences, you catch his head tilting a little. “You’ve been shutting me out. Please, allow me in.”

You don’t know what to say, feeling more lost for words than you had been before. You watched him, his smile this time not momentary, but waiting patiently. For some reason, you just could not say no. But you couldn’t say yes either, even if the small nod you ended up giving him proved otherwise.

I just can’t help myself, can I?

You don’t see it, but you feel his hand tapping you. “I’m proud of you. You’ve already grown so much.” There’s a great sense of elation on Harrow’s face. This was what he’d wanted, and you’d just given it to him.

You struggled to be proud of yourself. His seal of approval was never something you desired. What you had desired though, was help, and he’d provided that. He had yet to break his promises yet, so why would he start now?

A small part of your mind held on to a lingering thought that you couldn’t shake. You feared that perhaps the closer he gets, the more dangerous he becomes. You wanted someone to understand you, appreciate you, and care about you, but was this the right person?

If I keep things up like this, he won’t hurt me, though. It could all be alright. It’s all or nothing.

[heyiwrotesomethings]

Got no brainworms today, which let's face it is probably a blessing with how busy you are, so insteaaaad I just wanna wish you a happy Friday! And... ok now that I think about it it's thanksgiving too isn't it. I kinda forgor since I'm in Canada but happy that, too! I'm very thankful for your fics, writing, replies, all that good stuff. You were a big reason I got back into Demon Slayer in the first place and I'm very grateful for it. Your fics are a ton of fun to read over and over and I'm always happy to bug you hear the things you have to say on all my goofy little ideas that come into my head when I fixate on Demon Slayer every few months. aha good luck when the next season comes out. I know you're a little worried about not putting out much recently but keep in mind I, and probably a lot of us, are happy to wait if it means you're focusing on yourself. This is getting a little bit longer than I meant to get but there's just a lot to appreciate so uh... strap in.? Your writing is a sort of feeling I've not been able to find anywhere else and it's very fun to experience. I don't think I could count the times I've read Love Blossoms or Weary Traveller even with both hands... So many are memorable and honestly I'd just list off so many that I enjoyed but... I think that'd just end up being your masterlist again. Maybe one day I'll gush over them a ton, but probably on those individual posts instead of your askbox. have fun with the notifications when that comes. Ok long winded appreciation over. I think. Anyway hope you have/had a good Thanksgiving if you celebrate it and I hope this Friday goes well too. It sounds like things are pretty hectic, but you've got this! Good luck, and take care! I'm off to go read Sparring Partner again that one slaps

Thank you so much, this is all very kind, I don’t even know what to say 😭💜

Hope you have a good weekend, and hopefully I can get some of this half finished stuff done soon. Much love and appreciation to all of you, thank you all for sticking around 😊

[lutiaslayton]

Hey guys! Guess who's FINALLY done writing her thesis manuscript, who's finally freed from the nightmare that was getting it corrected by my three PhD directors who each had their own expectations piling onto each other's, getting it printed and mailed to her jury, and completing dozens of administration related details, and who is finally allowed to have some free time to rest after all that 👀 (PS: I have one week)

I know "I" have been posting ED chapters every week and reblogging others' stuff every now and then, but regarding the ED chapters it's really just been the queue doing all the work haha. I'd actually finished writing the translation all the way back in August and decided to post a chapter per week in anticipation for these tough times when I'd be virtually dead online, just so this blog would be on some sort of life support in the meantime. I've been editing the PREV/NEXT links as each chapter came out (sometimes a day or two late because I forgor), but other than that I've only been browsing tumblr as a half-brained shadow 🥲

All that being said — I need rest. I've stayed up late up to 2-3am working and writing and drawing graphs way more often than my body would have preferred, pulled at least one all-nighter, and lost literally all sense of time (well, more than usual that is). I'm kinda writing this with the only brain cell I have left right now lmao.

So. After working on it since April, I finished writing my thesis. 171 pages, 49409 words with even more text that has been written and then scrapped for the current version, 58 graphs, 20 tables, 165 references in the bibliography, and tons of equations. Whatever am I going to do now?

...write even more words, of course 🤭

I know there's a lot of translation work to do, a lot of other work elsewhere, and just thinking of looking at my to-do list is making my brain implode. And you'd think that after writing so much to the extent that my eyes started burning 24/7, I'd be sick of writing. But... strangely it's the opposite lmao

All that to say, SLS hasn't been updated since April 1st, and this needs to be fixed. I miss these dorks so much and I need some self-indulgent fanfiction writing after all this.

PS: I say I have one week to rest, because my PhD isn't over yet. I still have a scientific paper to start writing right after I come back from the grave (thankfully for that one I won't be the only one writing), and after that, I'll have my PhD defence planned for December 11. So yeah, I'm still not off the hook quite yet hahaha

[slowdripsunrise]

MORE READING UPDATES OMLLLLLLL i forgor about this blog again. it will happen again tbh but i still have to go through all of the books i finished in late 2023 up to now... i'm gonna try and get as many as i can done but probably wont get all of them lol. probably very long post/rant + spoilers for various books under the cut

keep in mind i have shit memory and all of these books were finished a while ago so be warned for bad analysis and summaries

-How High We Go in the Dark by Sequoia Nagamatsu: this book was a collection of short stories that are interconnected through characters and a central storyline - a plague. i thought the concept was super interesting and i had heard really good things about it from people i share a reading taste with so i went into this expecting to be blown away and i just. wasnt. i LOVED some of the short stories and there were a few that made me cry, mainly snortorious and the robot dog story where the mom died, but other than that it was kinda a let down. the ending fucking sucked ngl. like i thought we were leading up to some profound moment, especially calling back to the chapter where people are relieving their memories in the dark, because i thought that was really compelling and interesting, but it was just fucking aliens. like it reallly feels like a cop out to me. like a whole "and it was all just a dream" type ending. im not gonna rate it actually yes i am i'd give it like 2.5-3 stars. only because some of the chapters were super hard hitting but other than that. meh.

-The Raven Cycle by Maggie Stiefvater: WHOOOOO BOY. i ate this shit up. god if i had read this in middle school or high school i am 100% certain it would have become my entire personality. like i fucking get it. i totally fucking get it. i'm treating the whole series as one book rn bc they all kinda blend together in my mind and its been a while but just. the fucking vibes. good lord the vibes were so good. can't pick out any 100% certain things i particularly noticed but i will reblog every webweave about this series there is trust. rating the entire series as 5 stars mostly because i listened to the audiobook and they did SUCH A GOOD JOB ON TH E AUDIOBOOK OML like. at first i was kinda thrown off bc i wasn't expecting it to be so. southern? but once i finished the first one i knew there was no way i could just go back to reading it with a physical book like audiobook all the way the narrator was so awesome and i love the southernness of it.

-What Moves the Dead by T. Kingfisher: my first t. kingfisher book! i loved the vibes, the world, the whole new set of pronouns, that shit was so fun, overall a nice short and sweet creepy ass fucking book. like im a huge wimp so i was deffo nervous and freaked out at some points, especially with the rabbits lol idk why but those were unnerving. the author did a really good job of conveying the mc's anxiety and fear while also adding in some humor and soldier rationality and stoicism. lol. cute i liked it 3.5/4 stars.

-Fault Lines by Emily Itami: tbh mostly picked this one up for the cover and it was really just a standard cheating story where the mc gets back together with her original husband because of their kids. nothing i remember to be groundbreaking at all really. 2.5 stars

-Olga Dies Dreaming by Xochitl Gonzalez: I really wasn't expecting to like this book as much as I did. the pov changes i think were very well done and intentional and weren't confusing at all! the narrators for the audiobook were wonderful and really brought life to the story, a lovely book.

-She Who Became the Sun by Shelley Parker-Chan: honestly, looking back on it, i was never really captivated by this story. it took me a long time to get into it, and i really never connected with any of the characters. a lot of it was more confusing than not, and i'm honestly not sure if i feel the need to continue the series. may be a case of me not being in the right mood for it, but i don't see myself trying it again. kinda sad cuz i was excited to love this but oh well. win some lose some.

-Cloud Cuckoo Land by Anthony Doerr: hands down my fav book of 2023 and one of my fav books of all time. like i have a feeling this review is going to be either very long or very short because there is no way i will be able to write out all the ways i love this book. the owl motif. the environmental extremism from seymore that i can 100% relate to. the way that he fell down that path in a way that felt realistic to me, based on his circumstances, and it isn't implied in my opinion, that all autistic people are like this, that all autistic people can take things to the extreme like seymore did. the audiobook was wonderful. the interconnected stories over time i think is one of my new favorite tropes/plots/metas. if done well (cough how high we go in the dark) it gets me every single time. XENO and everything about him. i was listening to the audiobook at work and during his death i had to fight back tears lol. god. and the kids in the play and how they wanted to end the story.... fuck my life. and konstance and her curiosity and oh my god everything about this book messed me up. 5/5 i think thats all i'll be able to say before i combust.

-Chlorine by Jade Song: what a weird little book. really liked it. audiobook slayed. not much else to say. recommend for weird lesbians. 3.5/4 stars.

-A Dowry of Blood by S. T. Gibson: THE AUDIOBOOK NARRATOR IS SO FUCKING GOOD AT HER JOB I COULD LISTEN TO HER TALK ALL DAY I THINK IM IN LOVE WITH HER. the story was really good love a good vampire story love a good creepy story. fun time. listened to the audiobook in like an hour hour and a half car ride it was a good time. 3.5 stars.

and that ends off all of the books i read in 2023 !!!!!!! YIPPEEE!!!!! i'll stop here and make a separate post for the books i've read so far in 2024 just for organizational purposes and also because i am hungry and need to stop lol. if you made it this far through the post i love you and also sorry for the long rant but also too bad because this is my blog and you clicked on it. happy reading :)

[yuki-kazami]

While you all are here because I'm being spicy and mad about gay animals, I guess I should also post this bc I forgor:

https://archiveofourown.org/works/45889033

More spicy gay animals (Saria/Silence one-take prompt fic)

((Is this how you link fics on tumblr?? I don't use this shit I just like the art help am I supposed to post the whole text or something))

(((I guess you do post the text I don't know what's happening help im just smol)))

Closure:

Silence took a deep breath, steadying herself.

She could do this.

She needed to do this.

No more ambiguity, no more questions, no more secondhand info from Parvis of all people, that amoral old goat.

The fire with which she had defended her convictions towards Saria had long since burned low. It had been years since the incident at Rhine Labs. She’d married Joyce, Ifrit had grown into a capable young woman. Still, old wounds left scars, and she couldn’t just move on without closure.

Gathering up her resolve, she slid the door open to the observation deck. Harsh sunlight caused her to squint, but as her vision cleared, there she was. Saria stood alone, her back to the doorway, staring out into the vast expanses of rock. Her stance was firm. To most, it would be captivating, inspiring. It looked as if she was prepared to carry the world on her shoulders. And yet, Silence couldn’t stop herself from seeing it as lonely.

She shook her head, stepping forward.

“Saria.”

“Silence.”

Saria turned around as the door closed with a quiet whoosh. For some time, the pair simply stood there, eyes locked. Each passing moment brought more uncertainty into Silence’s gut. Even if the Saria of now was different to the one back then, even if she had grown and learned since her time as director, could she really handle being told that Parvis had been right? That Ifrit had been little more than an experiment Saria had a fondness for?

Or worse still, what if she had been-

She couldn’t bring herself to finish that thought, digging her nails into her palms to bring her focus back to reality.

“Silence, are you alright? We can speak another time if you need-“

“NO! No, I’m sorry, I just…” She grit her teeth, knowing that even with Joyce’s prodding, she wouldn’t be able to muster this courage up again. The cold shine of Parvis’s glasses in that darkened observation room haunted her mind, the moment her reality had cracked, that her heart had been torn to pieces.

“I need to know. I need you to be honest with me, Saria. Why did you leave Rhine Labs?”

It wasn’t what she wanted to ask. It wasn’t what she wanted to know. But she… she just couldn’t bring herself to say more, to risk what little trust she had left in the person she used to rely on shattering.

Saria’s face hardened as her eyes grew distant. “I grew disgusted with Control. Human experimentation is far from the ideals that we established Rhine Labs under. She lost sight of why what we were doing mattered.”

“Oh, is that so!?” A sudden, violent explosion that caught even Saria off-guard. “Really now, Saria? That’s what you have to say? You had a supposed ideological conflict? What about Ifrit? If you care so much about human experimentation, why did you leave her to suffer in their hands?” New fuel brought roaring flames back into her heart.

Saria’s voice remained comparatively calm, if a bit strained. “Silence. I trusted you with her. The paths I’ve walked were not those safe for a child.”

“Oh, her safety! That’s right, you had to make sure that your specimen wasn’t damaged! Silly me, I forgot that you needed Project Diabolus to complete successfully! After all, it must have been a costly cover-up making sure that the old experiment site didn’t hit Columbian news! Parvis showed me that you even made sure to sign off on the flamethrower they developed for the experiment! Very diligent, Director.” Silence was heaving at this point, half a decade of emotion echoing in the still air around the landship. Tears threatened at the corner of her eyes as she aired her grievances.

Saria’s voice rose in kind, confused and frustrated at the sudden vitriol. “Olivia, what kind of person do you think I am!? What the hell did Parvis tell you that made you believe him over me!? That very day, I went to Control and demanded that we go public with the news of Haydn Labs, only to be entirely shut down as being out of line!”

“DON’T YOU CALL ME THAT! Was that the same meeting where you agreed that the experiment should proceed as long as Ifrit’s life wasn’t in danger, and where you agreed to kill her if she had another episode!? And don’t play dumb with me, I saw you just about to until I showed up that night!” Tears flowed freely down Silence’s cheeks, her fists flailing in the air as she stormed up towards Saria, puffing up her feathers to be as intimidating a foe as her small stature could be.

Surprising even to Silence, it was Saria who ran out of gas first. She took a step back, face in her hands, shaking slightly. “Olivia.” Somehow, said with such a grave tone, Silence couldn’t bring herself to chastise Saria again for using her name. “Every night. Every night, for years, I’ve seen that blank gaze, the demon we forced inside that poor girl. I tried everything I could. Words, gestures, violence when I was forced to. All I wanted was for her to wake up, to see us again.”

Silence stepped back, her limbs suddenly leaden against her side. “Saria…” Things were beginning to click together, her worst fears come to life.

“The fire shields failed. The entire block of the landship was about to go up in flames. Potentially thousands of innocent people. And still, for one of the only times in my life, I had a moment of hesitation before I leapt into battle. Every time I hit her, I felt a part of myself die. She didn’t know what she was doing. She was an innocent kid forced to live out the whims of scientists playing God.”

The last of Silence’s coals burned out, leaving nothing but ash in the face of the truth. She wobbled, barely remaining standing as Saria continued on.

“How could I stop, Olivia? I couldn’t win. I had to keep fighting, even though it hurt. And at the end, when she woke up just before… just before I could make my final mistake? She gave me the candy she had saved the other portion of. Lying on the ground, bruised and battered nearly beyond recognition from my own Arts, she grinned because she was so happy I came to visit her. There is a part of me that still wonders why I didn’t kill both Parvis and Control that very night.”

Silence fell to her knees in front of Saria, shaking from the depth of her revelation. “Why… Why didn’t you… say anything…? All these years…”

Saria knelt down next to her, a concerned look on her face. “Because I knew you were right. If I had stepped in sooner, if I had fought Control harder, if I had taken over on the “treatment” to monitor it, none of this would have happened. Her blood has always been on my hands, and I nearly took her life. I don’t deserve her, or you, Olivia.”

A crisp smack echoed out across the plateau, new fire in Silence’s eyes.

“Shut up, you rock brained idiot.”

Silence grabbed the back of Saria’s horns and pulled her into an aggressive kiss.

[starrygender]

HEWO!

i was just watching jaiden animations video on being aroace && i was trying to think on how i would describe MY gender and sexuality and it got so complex i just spiraled and got a lil light bulb moment,

I forgor what the term was called, i think ‘-lexic’ ??

Anyways; a gender that can be described as a (metaphorical) smoothie !

———- random details; doenst have 2 be including for the gender i just wanna talk cuz my adhd brain is bouncy right now!!!!!!!!!

so like; if u were to look at a pink smoothie (maybe with some bits that are different colors) you would probably assume it was just ice, strawerries, milk, and some blueberries or somethin! But if u saw ALL the ingredients, theres strawberries, a teeny bit of banana, blue berries definitely! Throw in some black berries here and a raspberry here…..add ice, milk AnD whipped cream with sprinkles even tho its being blended and boom. Thats what my gender feels like.

(Explained: i overall go by ‘genderqueer’ because im actually like 15+ different contradictory genders all at once and that is just too hard to explain to some people :))

SOWWY FOR RAMBLING!!!!! YIPPEE!!!!!!

lexic is for genders that are related to a word, though not necessarily what the word means. i think this is something similar to slimegender, not in meaning, but in idea. where your gender feels like a lot of things mixed together, but its not genuinely related to slime and such. just like your smoothie analogy.

smoothial

for when your gender is comparable to the making of a smoothie and/or the blended nature of smoothies, with all its ingredients, no matter how diverse, blended into one!

(hey sorry for taking so long on this. ill be continuing to take requests as normal, i just... had this weird mental barrier that kept me for actually working on and posting these for a very, very long time. all the rest of my requests should be finished by... lets be really generous just in case, three (3) days time.)

[gooperblooper]

anyway i checked my completion stuff

21/23 main quests. i will forever be annoyed that you can't ~actually~ finish destroy gan/find zeld quests

49/60 side adventures

30/31 shrine quests, also i checked and 20 of the shrine quests i did were the stupid fucking crystal ones. literally 2/3s of the quests are the exact same shit. how people shit on ss for making you fight a boss three times but accept this lazy fucking garbage makes me sjfhdh

98/139 side quests, and i think some of these might be misko's treasures stuff that i ended up finding on my own without activating the quest. unless those are marked in side adventures, i forgor

144/152 shrines, 120/120 lightroots, the remaining 8 shrines are all on the surface and i know where they are because of the lightroots i just didn't finish them because i wanted to leave a few extra to do post final boss. also i'm so annoyed that they once again made it so you can either complete your hearts or stamina but not both

62.56% complete according to the map, so i'm guessing they again decided to weight korok completion as if its equal to the other shit which makes it seem fucked. i've done like 110 or smth idk i didn't think to check. i don't even know how many korok seeds are in this game come to think of it??? actually i just googled it and apparently there's 1000 lmao fuck off

also idk how many bubbul gems there are overall either but last time i talked to koltin i had like 90 something more to go and now i have like 62, so 30~ left to go of that. and didn't think to check the wells either but i think i've got like 20 left of those

i found/bought all the clothes also but the only thing i upgraded the whole way was the fierce deity outfit cuz it's the best and i love him. i haven't found the sword of the six sages or just sword yet as far as previously amiiboexclusive stuff goes, but i'm pretty sure i've found all the other weapons n stuff

also still got some compendium left to complete

as disappointed as the ending made me about everything, i still really enjoy the game and plan to go back to it to finish shit up (well. besides the koroks and fully upgrading all armor bc i can't be assed). bubbul gem lover 4 lyfe