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#has anyone thought of this before? idk if anyone has. oh well.
velvetvexations · 2 days
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I'm not a trans woman, just a trans person who has been very active in trans and queer spaces, so it actually makes me really sad to see so many transradfems absolutely vilify femboys and gnc men because from what I've seen a LOT of trans women start out as gnc "men" or femboys or drag queens even just expiriementing in a safe place that welcomes that before realizing they're actually women and heading out(or even still being there hanging with the people who welcomed them when they were unsure and needed a community that wouldn't treat them like a freak for saying "I don't want to be masculine anymore").
Like so many trans men and mascs start out ID-ing as butch lesbians or just butches/tomboys in general and they don't turn around and vilify non-transmasc butches and tomboys as like...transandrophobes or women play acting as men, and most of them keep their ties to that community because again, that's where they were welcomed and sheltered while they figured stuff out.
And I know SO many asexuals who thought they were bi before realizing they were ace and while that isn't exactly the same they don't like, turn around and attack bi people for welcoming them as a member of the club when they needed support.
I mean it is just my perspective and I'm just one person and again I'm not a trans woman but nearly every trans woman I know who didn't like come out as a 6 year old started out just dressing up as a girl for fun first and hanging out in gnc, femboy, and drag spaces. And isn't this also why we have egg jokes about femboys and gnc men(as much as I don't like them)?? Because it's common to start off there before cracking and realizing "oh I'm a girl actually"? Why are transradfems being like "yeah I started here but everyone ELSE there is a transphobic freak" like???
It just...idk it's really sad to see transradfems attack gnc men and femboys and drag queens even because like, you obviously don't owe them anything or have to view them as your saviors or whatever but there's undeniable community overlap and seeing that ignored in favor of pretending anyone wearing woman's clothes while IDing as a man is clearly a massive transmisognist freak who deserves to be attacked when that's what a lot of trans women started out as is like...what?
Makes me really sad. We're supposed to be in this together, right? We're all deviants in one way or another, I even count otherwise cishet but still gnc men as my queer allies, like it or not imo back when Finnster ID-ed as a cishet man I still thought they were one of us(I mean getting banned from twitch for adjusting your bra strap seems like some textbook misogyny and even transmisogny but what do I know), we're all under attack for just trying to live the lives we want to live. What good does it do to divide us up like this. How are those of us who don't know right away going to find our footing if we don't have safe spaces to expiriement with people who will love and support us and cheer when we figure out who we truly are? How are those of us who are deviant but not trans supposed to thrive without support and acceptance?
Isn't that what this is all supposed to be about?
It's depressing. Thank you for your thoughts, anon. <3 I appreciate that others see this same thing and also despair. It makes me feel like I'm not cracking up to know that this is alarming to you as well.
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kacievvbbbb · 2 days
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Idk why I find the fact Mihawk writes Y/N Reader inserts so funny but so true and I have reader inserts blocked on here like I hate them but oh my god so in character for him.
And he does not give a shit. Absolutely go king and getting fantasy dicked down by all the hot guys in one piece world I support! Also him being a sengoku shipper iconic. I was say maybe he thinks about Kuzan but I think he’s out off by his general laziness and apathy and not in a fun apathetic way like Barsolino in a depression way. ( he’s looking in a mirror and does not like it.) but if he learns Dragon used to be a marine and friends with Akainu he’s making the most toxic relationship of them friends to enemies to nemesis type shit.
He’ll write a new book and it will be a sensation and no matter the fact he changed the names everyone with a brain cell will be able to figure out who it’s about.
Sorry this took so long to reply! but
YES YES YES!!! I don't really like self insert stuff either but it's so in-character for him I'm so obsessed.
And yeah it really is just the adventures of reader as they travel across the grand line getting dicked down is definitely one of his most beloved and acclaimed series. Shanks goes hot and cold on that series a lot because while the idea of watching mihawk getting dicked down by another man is very hot Shanks is also a jealous man and he is very jealous of these "fictional" men. He tries to find out if mihawk has ever fucked any of them in real life and maybe 👀.
Also yeah I just threw in the marine thing because I thought it was funny but I'm glad it stuck out! 😂. I don't think he self ships with any of the marines (maybe in his GILF era sengoku or fujitoro) I think because none of the really strong marines appeal to him but he would fuck smoker if he was stronger. and just because I remembered dude and I think it would be so funny imagine if his only self x marine ship is with Ryokugyu (the tree admiral) I think he'd hate him in life but he's not blind. I think this realllllly pisses shanks off because he does not like him and honestly its a bit of a snake eating his own tail because a lot of the reason he doesn't like him is because of Mihawk's fanfiction of him.
I think Mihawk's natural reaction (mostly because it's mine) is to ship Sengoku with Garp but he hates Garp and even the thought of picturing him in that way is enough to make him want to pour his ears to bleach his brain. I think it be funny if during one of his lackadaisical checking out marine headquarters rooms (because realistically who is going to stop him) he stumbles upon and old picture of Garp Sengoku and Tsuru when they were young and he is very intrigued by thetwo hot young men then he notices that one of them is Garp and he almost throws up, the thought wont leave him alone tho.
Also yes i don't think Mihawk actually knows dragon but he has definitely heard of him and being Garps son is enough cause for pettitness in his eyes. Dragon's identity is a little harder to parse out I the books but Akainu's is so fucking obvious. And it is a loved and well-cherished series. Anytime that Mihawk attends a warlord meeting or just genuinely has an unpleasant interaction with akainu (which is every interaction) he puts pen to paper. It'd be funny if this was the most "tame" series though more focused on the fictional romace which confuses dragon and pisses akainu off even more because what? do they think he can't take it? and mihawk is very pleased with himself. he drops a new edition right before he goes to any warlord meeting so he can watch akainu seethe in real time as the new talk of the town takes root (this series specifically is very popular in marine towns)
as for the real life identities. I think he definitely makes it a bit hard not to protect anyone. Still, because he thinks it's fun to make people guess and adds to the mystery so there is definitely a fan club (which Shanks leads) dedicated to putting the clues together on just who all the different men are (shanks needs this for....research purposes 👀) some of them are obvious if you're in the know like the Benn ones or Crocodile while others are just plain obvious because the Red Haired Emperor is definitely shanks like if you know shanks you know its him there is only two people with hair that red. It's not kidd( it does give both kidd and shanks a bit of a reputation of some islands because his book counterpart is infinitely more dashing and "masculine" that shanks' bum and kid's manica energies) and I think he makes the Akianu ones very obvious to anybody that literally even if you've just ever heard of him you know its him just to fuck with him.
#thank you for the ask!#once agaion sorry it took so long I just had a lot of thoughts about it and kept putting it off because I'm a procastinator😔#and sorry for all the atrocius spelling and punctuation was just yapping#I do definitely think that these books get so famous and become so well known that it becomes more of an insult not to have one about you#You know you've made it as a pirate/marine if you have an entire book about you and not just a chapter but people are happy#three measures of being a renowned pirate bounty fleet size and do you have a smut novel?#if you don't even have a series? then you don't belong in the conversation tih the ogs#cause mihawk's been doing this he was like 19 mostly as a way to fund his travels but as the challenger pulls dwindles it grows more seriou#to even be mentioned at all. none of the rookies have one yet because mihawk doesn't care or know about any of them besides zoro and luffy#which would be infitinely weird if he wrote about them becuase and zoro's his son and luffy is shanks'#but when perona finds out about this because she obviously does she starts to write her own with mihawk helps#so as little attachments in his publications there is a new female reader and a lot more lesbian and bisexual porn.#and the new kids appear more and she is defiantly all over baby five and reiju's comic character. kidd and law are also a favorite pairing#Zoro is very confused about all of this#hawkeye mihawk#op#dracule mihawk#akagami no shanks#shanks#akataka#mishanks#red haired shanks#one piece#one piece multiships#KC's ask mes🌸#one piece funny
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becauseplot · 1 year
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Y'all I have Thoughts about wither skeleton (hybrid?) q!Missa:
Death/skeleton aesthetic!! (Death Duo my beloved)
Wither-dust-like markings on face/body to make him look more ~spooky skeleton~ (For the face, I'm thinking in patterns like Día de Muertos make-up.)
Empty sockets with little, bright blue soulfires for eyes.
Thin/bony/skeletal hands with that lovely little black->skintone gradient from fingertips->elbows
If he shakes around, he makes a faint rattling noise. No one knows exactly where in his body it's coming from, least of all him.
Great with sword but frankly AWFUL with a bow. (Phil teases him relentlessly for this.)
Cold to the touch! This is because he has a very, VERY low-grade withering effect to everything he touches, which saps only warmth (not life) from others.
He DOES have the ability to wither others tho, so watch out >.>
When angry/upset, wither dust starts collecting around him in clouds until he's just a looming fog of death. (His soulfire eyes burn through the darkness like headlights and it is TERRIFYING.)
Loves the hot weather on the island! Somehow, it feels like home. He has a very high heat tolerance, and he wears cloaks/thick layers all day every day; meanwhile, warm-blooded mammal Phil---with his big black heat-absorbing wings---is dying. (Missa teases him relentlessly for this.)
Fucking PETRIFIED of dogs. Like, primal fear. He will full-on Scooby-Doo jump into Phil's arms at the sight of a pomeranian.
Wither skeletons learn to fight with weapons when they're very young, which is why Missa was so quick to give newly-adopted Chayanne a sword. He's very proud of his little warrior <3
If he holds bones/dead matter in his hands and concentrates hard enough, he can turn it into pure soul sand. This is great for making long-burning torches, camp fires, etc.
I might come back and add more! Feel free to share any ideas you might have :D Wither skeleton q!Missa lives rent free in my head.
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Dammit heart why are you like this ik she's like the exact damn girl you would've thought up to be as attractive and friend as humanly possible to me but you still don't have to be this whiny about it.
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justinefrischmanngf · 10 months
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it’s not that it makes me sad per se but i really could’ve been dating someone i did actually kind of really want to date since JULY. and now the moment is literally so far gone and i didn’t realise until the moment was so far gone !!!
#like it actually doesnt make me sad because there wouldve been major complications Had we dated#and the person who i trust most in this world has told me theyre glad it didnt happen#and i think in the long run he’s not the First person i should date anyway like in an ideal world we’d date like. 2-3 years on from now when#i’d been in at least one relationship to work out how i operate in a relationship#but it’s also like i wish i had known that the opportunity was there and i wish i had taken it#and part of me goes well maybe in 2-3 years it COULD happen#but i think that does a disservice to the person he’s dating now like . i do hope they’re happy and it goes well for the both of them#AND ALSO ITS WEIRD AS FUCK TO BE LIKE OH WELL MAYBE IN A FEW YEARS ILL DATE THIS PERSON *AFTER* another person??????#like bitch who do you think u are that you’ll have managed to date ANYONE in that time and also why the fuck would u date someone without#hoping it would last????????#but thoughts ≠ action nor are they inherently moralistic#but also that’s a weird way 2 think about relationships#it’d be funny if it happened though#idk i just think that if the timing was different he and i could have so much fun dating like genuinely i think it’d be a really good time#but it’s really weird because i’m not pining away after him or anything like ik it sounds like i am#but it’s not like that it’s more just that it’s opened up all these thoughts that i hadn’t really thought possible before ?#and they’re not possible NOW bc he’s dating someone else so i’m in exactly the same position but idk#i think i’m getting too settled. i’m TOO SETTLED.#because it’s literally not normal to think oh maybe in three years we could date and it’d be better timing for both of us ???????????#unhinged behaviour. what the fuck is that.#it’d be fucking hilarious if it happened tho
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moe-broey · 2 years
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Revisited my Hel Sharena concepts and it was. A complete disaster actually. But I feel like I'm on the right track???
I have like. Maybe too many competing themes.
I really wanted a wolf in sheep's clothing motif, hence the ram horns and I planned on a wooly cape that's a shorter version of Henriette's. I was planning on designing a wolf-themed weapon.
I also wanted to call back to the Book 3 cover art, have her design also mimic Henriette in the way Lif's design mimics Gustav. I also thought it would be neat to keep elements of her base design as well -- the shorts and the belt at the waist. Plus the tiniest resemblance to Alfonse bc in my heart you cannot separate them (and if you do. Horrible things happen).
Most of all, I really wanted her to be a fun and silly character. Who's like. Actually a genuine threat. I was thinking of Junko Enoshima (sorry Danganronpa jumpscare), Heather Chandler (in the way that she speaks, literally I want to give her a bone chainsaw bc that's SO funny and also so fucking cool), and honestly a bit of Dahlia Hawthorne. Bad bitches only (ESP blonde bad bitches who haunt the narrative). Also just. Rage. Cannot forget the rage!
Plus! Here's the dress that inspired the heart cutout (thought it would look really cool w how Hel characters Are)
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Actual photo of me whenever I try to think of a Bill Redemption Arc that I could write without making it the angstiest plotline ever known to man
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told my mom earlier that i’ve been intentionally filling up my time socially because i’m scared of having alone time bc the past few times i’ve given myself alone time i end up constantly thinking about being single and my whole shitty break up and i get really sad and angry to the point where i don’t want to leave my couch to eat or piss and she was like “that was a month ago now you’ll be fine you need to rest” and like objectively i know she’s right but also. i was also right.
#like genuinely i’m happy with where my life is at in terms of my career/school is going well#and i have my friends back in town which has been lovely#but like. for a solid three months i did not think i would be single right now. and by god i do not miss my shitty ex#but small things will continue to remind me of him even though i don’t want to think about him#and i am also constantly white elephanting myself by being like ‘oh you haven’t thought about him today! nice!’ and then thinking about him#but even then when i say thinking about him it’s more just being angry at what he did or missing being physically affectionate with someone#and that doesn’t have to be him#but oh my god do i miss being physically affectionate with someone. holy shit.#i did not understand the appeal of kissing before but by god do i now. and i have NO ONE to do it with#all of my best friends are in long term committed monogamous relationships. literally all of them#and i’ve already disastrously fucked up the dating a friend of a friend thing so i doubt anyone will want to recommend anyone to me now#the two guys i had the idea of trying to flirt with are both entirely unavailable#so i quite literally have zero prospects and no idea of where to find new ones bc the day i get on a dating app is the day that hell freezes#and i just feel so fucking lonely dude 🙃🙃#and i also feel very behind because all of my close friends are in committed relationships and i’ve never experienced that#even tho i want to so badly#i just. idk#anyway vent over#mari is irrelevant
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maddy-ferguson · 2 months
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i love that the last people heard the leftist coalition won the french legislative elections so they think we have a leftist government now lol
#and like i say: brf slt#i saw a tweet that said the french got a leftist government and now they get this ceremony the other day that's what inspired this lol#it's funny that that person thought the opening ceremony was planned in three weeks😭 there's a lot to say about that ceremony politically#and about the image it gives to france and by extension to macron especially when everything that's going on has been going on#the thing is. the 5th republic constitution basically enables dictator behavior. the 3rd and 4th were kind of unstable because they were#parliamentary in a way that made them change governments every five minutes especially the 4th republic it only lasted like 12 years not#great but that was also because of the war in algeria for independence maybe if we had given up sooner we would still be under the#4th republic lol. but anyway. de gaulle comes back writes a constitution and at first the president wasn't elected directly and was kind#of supposed to be above politics but now he's elected by everyone and the metaphor that people use often is he was supposed to be a#referee but now he's the captain of the team. but the thing is there's nothing anyone can do to him. like the national assembly can vote to#kick the gov out for politics but the president can only be dismissed by parliament 'in the event of a breach of his duties which is#manifestly incompatible with the exercise of his mandate' and like? sure ig? but it's not like the prime minister who's responsible#to the national assembly the president doesn't answer to anyone. it'll be a month in like 6 days and it's not like we don't have a#gov that situation would be preferable to the one we have rn macrons gov is still in place like they 'quit' but they're STILL HERE? so they#can't even be censored because they've already quit but also...they're still there and doing shit like they just caused a diplomatic crisis#with algeria to the point where the ambassador was called back lmao they were like oh no we need to stay to manage current affairs...#like oh i'm sure. and he literally said no one's won when like. no they won. like isn't that crazy lmao. if the far right had had a#relative majority he would have asked bardella to come to matignon on july 8. like since the left doesn't have an absolute majority would#the national assembly vote for them to be sent home as soon as they were nominated? idk maybe! but what he's doing is soooooo...he's like#hm no no one won (mind you he didn't get an absolute majority in 2022 either but it was a win then) so they need to form alliances and then#i'll listen but it's basically -> the left (sans lfi) needs to form an alliance with macronists and then macron can appoint a prime#minister who's on his side (lmao basically might as well keep attal he was in the socialist party when he was like 17 so he counts as a#leftist figure right) or macronists can form an alliance with the right and basically nothing changes. anyway the second scenario#is what's gonna happen most likely and it's gonna be even worse than it was before even when the left wins we lose lmao but it's like. him#literally denying the results of the election is driving me crazy. why doesn't anyone else see how crazy that is lol. at least if they go#with the alliance with the right maybe people will stop considering them CENTRISTS. but probably not#and also he's decided since it's the olympics we're doing a political truce🤗 and it's only giving what's literally HIS#ILLEGITIMATE GOVERNMENT more time to do things they shouldn't be doing because they were voted OUTTTTT#this is a guy who said he thinks french people need a king and there shouldn't be a two-term limit. like remember when i said he's always#three weeks away from declaring a third empire last month. his ass is never leaving he's gonna be doing a 1851 coup in 2027 (a? an)
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sleepyjim2 · 2 months
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yap sesh in the tags ! <3 nothing new im just frustrated abt my disordered sleep schedule as always . woke up at 5 pm and i will probably be failing my All Dayer and going to sleep shortly At 8 am and then sleeping for 1 billion years
#text#it feels like shit all the time bc it affects Everything Else#i dont get to interact with Real People very much . i dont get any sunlight . i feel weak and sick and gross all the time#i often barely eat at all the whole time im awake bc i just dont get hungry#n i cant rlly get up during the night anyways cause i risk gettin in trouble or waking up the dogs n getting them all riled up#more often than not i will eat. just toast or cereal cause i miss dinner and then thats it all the time im awake#oh also i can barely keep track of time anymore ! i noticed this months ago but like#i only know sundays bc i hear my mom wake uo n get ready for church right before i usually go to sleep n thats abt it now lol#it doesnt rlly matter anyways i guess cause theres not Day theres just Time Im Awake For#sometimes very small . sometimes a lot longer than one day#a friend also pointed out that my suicidal thoughts seem to get worse whenever my sleep gets really bad (like once or twice a month lmao)#n those r probably related bc of everything else being worse as well#i feel like im just watching it all happen n i dont have much control over my own body or mind#i always wake up in pain or with a migraine n sometimes i have seizures in my sleep#i just spend 75% of my time lately sitting or laying down in bed doing nothing cause i cant sleep n it sucks#my mom thinks its funny how hyped i get whenever im allowed to Go Anywhere but like thats the only time im Awake For Real . alive 😭#not like we go anywhere fun but like .walmart idk. when i can go is able to pull me out of the wretched hell that is Sitting In Bed Forever#n its been like this for well over a year lol#i ride da walmart high for about 12 or so hours after n then it just goes right back to schmiserable schmiserable sitting in bed forever#my entire world has shrunk to sitting in bed forever#posting now heart emoji . hwello if anyone read this all
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fardf150 · 3 months
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fuck
#like idk i never realized just how bad she hurt me. i didnt even rly realize she hurt me at all#bc there are so so so many ways she sldve reacted so much worse. but like i never thought someone cld just straight up ignore it.#like i get the way i told her was dumb and confusing. ok. i can understand that. whatever#but idk. she said she wished my sister had told her years earlier so that she cldve helped her back then#but then suddenly it's different when it's me. suddenly it's 'but youve always been my little girl' and 'oh i dont know that sounds dangerou#s' and 'are you sure?' and 'how long have you felt like this'#well it's been almost 5 fucking years now and it hasnt changed. i havent changed. fuck#i trusted her. i trusted her to be there for me and to support me and to accept me and she threw it back in my face and never even blinked#i can never ever trust her again and she doesnt care. she doesnt even know bc shes so wrapped up in all the fucking lies she tells herself#fuck. she did everything wrong. fuck. i can never fully trust anyone with this part of me again bc of her#and it's awful bc it's such an important part of me. it brings me so much joy and i think on it often and i love myself for it#but it's just simmering in my chest and every time i think of letting it hit air again i freeze bc i thought it was safe once and it WASNT.#i wanted to get my name changed before high school. i wanted to start the medical process. i wanted all the thing i thought shed do for me.#my wants and my understanding of my identity has changed now but it still hurts.#it hurts so bad to see other ppl my age get all of that and to have the support of their family and to not be afraid to put a name to it all#im happy for them. but it's so awful hearing her point those ppl out w no self awareness like oh thats so good for them isnt that sweet#I AM RIGHT HERE! YOU COULD BE DOING ALL OF THAT! I NEEDED YOU TO BE THAT FOR ME!#and every time she does acknowledge it she gets it completely wrong or it's just to bemoan how little she understands#'oh everyones changing their name now its so confusing' 'im really trying i dont know what else you want from me' NO YOURE NOT! YOURE NOT!#YOUVE NEVER BEEN WILLING TO TRY. NOT FOR ME.#you never fucking loved me you loved the idea of what you thought i would be and you cant fucking let it go even when the truth is staring#you dead in the face. fuck. you complain about how i 'hate you' or 'think youre stupid' well maybw treat me with an ounce of respect and act#like you understand the things youve EXPLICITLY BEEN TOLD. even a little.#but honestly it's too late. if she were to suddenly have a change of heart now i wouldnt give a damn.#the damage is done you dont get to have this part of me and act like youre such a good and supportive mother.#i cant even say i hate her. i love her but shes hurt me more than anyone else ever has and i can never trust her to actually love me or even#fucking see me or support anything about me that actually matters to me#i dont know. i dont know. thinking about it again.#ive thought abt telling my dad. not bc it wld do any good but bc ik he values honesty and maybe hed throw me a 'damn that sucks'#my sister said this is something i have to fight on but she doesnt get it. i have no ground to stand on as far as shes concerned
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diabetesnscoliosis · 6 months
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Yeah so I think a lot of ppl tend ti reblog shit in good faith but when people are making oneu off of deceiving you, no. Yoi habe to be a bit more critical. The far right gets in so many movements bc of this. They're the ones making money off of this
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celestiamour · 2 months
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‧₊˚✧ ❛[ it's a gift (you keep those) ]❜
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ft. logan howlett x f! reader — xmen, marvel
╰₊✧ giving him a plushie that reminded you of him┊1k words
setting: deadpool & wolverine (2024) worst! logan contains: fluff, crushes, probably ooc but he’s so cute & wade is hard to write for, written for dp&w logan so idk if he got gifts in xmen, i forgot about laura, they are in touch and have a wonderful father-daughter relationship, i’m so sorry, edited
➤ author's note: i have so many thoughts but too incompetent to write
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logan’s never sure who will appear when he opens the door as wade’s quite the extrovert, either vanessa or one of his many other friends whom he’s now become somewhat acquainted with, but he certainly wasn’t expecting to meet the familiar eyes of the cute neighbor who lived a few doors down. he nervously scratched the back of his head, suddenly becoming aware of his shabby appearance, “uh, are you looking for wade?”
“no, i was actually looking for you!” god, your smile is so bright, it’s blinding. he normally hates perfume of any sort as it’s so overpowering to his heightened senses, but the one that you wore smelled so lovely like always. is that a new shade of lip gloss you’re wearing? it really suits you. (why on earth is he noticing all of these details out of the blue? he needs to snap out of whatever spell you put on him after being introduced when he first showed up and only interacting in passing since then).
“looking for me?” he repeated, in disbelief, trying his best not to allow his surprise to slip into his voice. considering he isn’t from this dimension and not the most agreeable person to be around, he had no friends of his own yet and hasn’t been visited by anyone since he got here. a beat of panic struck him, thinking that he was in trouble for something and you came to complain. he really couldn’t think of any other reason you were here for him even though you were so cheerful.
you were carrying some shopping bags with you, dropping them on the ground before reaching into one and pulling out a large fuzzy plushie of a gray cat hidden under layers of glittery tissue paper, “i saw this cutie when i went shopping with my friends and thought it looked like you!” you held it out for him to take, looking so proud of the stuffed animal.
he hesitated for a second before accepting it, trying to take in the fact that you were reminded of him in your day-to-day life. it made his heart flutter, and he found himself dumbfounded by the feeling. he was frequently teased by his roomate about his little “crush” on you, claiming that it was oh so obvious and that the sooner he accepted it, the better, but he never realized until now how pathetic he was when it came to you. was the wolverine really getting butterflies like a fucking schoolgirl in his old-ass age? thank god no one was home right now to bully him about it, he would never hear the end of it.
“it does not look like me,” he scoffed playfully after a quick examination.
“no, it definitely does! it’s a big, grumpy kitty—” you took a step closer to hold it with him, pointing at all the similarities you observed, although it was clear you were exaggerating for laughs. “see the little frowny face and ears? it could be your identical twin separated from birth! willy mentioned that you act like a cat most of the time, and i think it fits perfectly!”
the smile he didn’t realize was plastered on his face faltered at the last piece of information, grateful that you didn’t notice. that idiot has been talking about him to you? he might as well forget about any chance of getting with you, because knowing how he yaps without a filter and loves to play matchmaker, you probably think he’s a freak of some sort. “only good things, i hope…”
you giggled, the sweetest sound he ever heard. “of course, he’s really fond of you… well, maybe a bit too fond, but you already know about that!” you opened your mouth to continue the conversation or say something else, but your phone started ringing and you excused yourself, looking a little shy as you grabbed up your bags. “i’ll talk to you later!” you sounded so excited about the prospect of it before leaving, your voice and footsteps becoming fainter as you walked back to your place.
“wait, you didn’t take back the cat—”
“it’s a gift! you keep those!”
“oh… right…”
he lingered for a moment, unable to say much in response since you left in such a rush. when was the last time someone gave him a present? staring at this brand new item, he still couldn’t see the resemblance in any way, but knowing that it was a gift from you gave him a rare feeling of happiness which returned every time he looked at it from then on among his few possessions. 
“oh my goodness, what is this adorable thing?!” wade exclaimed when he saw it sitting on the couch where logan slept, picking it up to gawk at before tossing it up in the air and catching it before it hit the floor. “ooh, let me guess, it’s a gift from her, isn’t it?” 
the mutant groaned at his mocking tone. “put it down before you ruin it with your grubby hands,” he commanded, snatching it from his grasp (rough enough to make his point clear, but carefully enough not to tear it apart). his roommate didn’t even bother pretending to be offended like he usually would as he was simply overjoyed that his “ship” was coming true. “it doesn’t mean anything, don’t make it weird.”
“it doesn’t mean anything?! how can you say that when it’s going to be the first gift you give to your first child together—”
“first what??”
“nevermind, what are you gonna name it?”
“i have to name it?”
“have you never owned a stuffed animal before? you have to name it! how heartbroken is she going to be when she asks what you named it and you say that you haven’t done that?! she’s gonna think that you don’t value her gifts!” you would think the world was going to end if he didn’t do so if you heard the way he was speaking.
“fine, i’ll name it…” he looked deeply into the toy’s soulless eyes, noting how soft the outer material was against his calloused hand, “... fluffy…”
“that’s such a shitty name—”
“shut the fuck up, it’s been decided.”
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luveline · 4 months
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Hey Jade!!! I was just wondering if you could do a soulmate au with Spencer please? Maybe something along the lines of those cheesy ones like the first words are tattooed on or they have the same tattoo idk, whatever you u feel like 😊
—Spencer meets his soulmate. You’re as lovely as he’s always pictured. fem, 1.3k
Someone will love me one day.
Spencer must think it a thousand times. When he has to put his mom in the sanitarium and he feels more alone than he ever has in his life, he knows one day someone will love him anyways. When he gets called ugly, too skinny, nerd, dork, and a handful of words that are even worse, he knows one day someone will say the opposite. He won’t be alone forever.
He was two when they appeared, dark black cursive words tucked against his pulse. Spencer felt ugly nearly every day of his life, wrong and weird, but the words on his wrist have never changed, ‘You’re so handsome I can’t believe it’s you.’
One day someone’s gonna look at him and see handsome.
Today, he feels pretty good. He’s back home in Washington, D.C., the grocery store he loves is open again after a long reconstruction, and they had a bunch of fruit from South America that he’s never tried before. He carries a white plastic bag full of fruit, bread and cheese back to his apartment, each step in the sunshine, the kiss of it warming his cheeks. A busker plays music near the mouth of the subway station. Nobody has yet to scowl at him for being in the way.
He’s wondering what he forgot when he sees you. You’re smiling, the sun on your face and arms, which are strangely full. Books slide against your chest, but besides a little huff and a shift of your elbow, you don’t seem to notice the slim paperback working its way through the crowd in your arms. It drops down onto the sidewalk but you keep walking. You must be in a hurry.
Spencer darts forward to your dropped book, thumb under the title. Charlotte’s Web by E. B White. The spine is flaking and soft from use.
He should call out for you. You’re already getting too far away.
Spencer crosses the road and dives deeper into the city with you. Washington, D.C. isn’t without grandeur —it’s the capital of the USA— and so he finds himself surrounded by potted trees and stretches of well tended grass. School’s broken for the day, children weaving around on bikes and scooters or holding hands with their parents taking up altogether too much space. He loses you in the crowd.
Spencer stops in defeat.
Maybe if he puts the book back in your path you’ll see it on the way back.
He’s not sure why he doesn’t. Spencer keeps your book and starts to walk home. This isn’t how he’d usually get there, but he can manoeuvre around the park.
He keeps an eye out for you. Ridiculously, he’d thought about giving the book back to you and making you smile. He hasn’t talked to anyone who wasn’t a cashier in two days.
“Hi.”
Spencer looks down. “Hi,” he says, spooked by the little girl in front of him.
“Is that for the library?”
He shakes his head regretfully. “No, I– I found it. I’m trying to give it back.”
“Okie dokie. I never read that one before.”
“I’m sorry, it’s not my book to give away… Where’s your mom?”
The little girl points at a mom and a younger child playing on the grass near a circle of benches. There’s a huge dark cabinet with its doors skewed open in the middle, and when he squints he realises it’s full of books. “Oh, is that the library?” he asks.
“Yes!” the little girl insists.
“Okay, well, here’s what we’ll do,” he says, looking desperately for you, disappointed when he can’t see a sign of your nice blue shirt or your sunny smile, “let me go see if I can find the lady who dropped this book, and if she says it’s okay, I’ll keep it for you to have. But you can’t run off from your mom again. Deal?”
The girl grins, thick hair shiny in the sun. “Deal!” she says, running in a burst toward her mother, who startles when she realises she’d left in the first place.
Spencer creeps toward the library. He can’t leave the book here now, he’s promised he’ll try to find you.
You come around the back of the library cabinet with a smile. Free Library, the sign says. Take one if you want, leave one if you can.
You stop in your path when you see him. You smile again, you’re prettier for it, lovely with the sun on half your face, your slight squint. You open your mouth to speak.
Spencer beats you to it. “Hi, I’ve been trying to catch up to you,” he says, raising your copy of Charlotte’s Web to his chest. “You dropped one of your books.”
You take a half step back.
Spencer grimaces. “I promised a little girl I’d ask if she can have it, I’m so sorry. I get stuck and I don’t know how to say no.”
Your eyes flash down to your hands. “You’re so handsome,” you say, and Spencer’s heart stops dead in his chest, your lips shaping each word without measure and somehow the prettiest anyone’s ever looked as they move, “I can’t believe it’s you.”
His shoulders sag with a deep breath.
You raise your arm to show him the contrasting font laid against your pulse. Hi, I’ve been trying to catch up to you.
Spencer shows you his. You’re so handsome, I can’t believe it’s you.
“It’s you,” he says.
You press your hand to your mouth. “I was walking too fast, right? When I was a kid I thought if I made everybody chase me that eventually somebody would have to say it, but then it stuck, and I rush everywhere I go.” Your voice turns breathless. “But you’re the person who was supposed to catch up to me.”
He smiles softly. “I think so.”
“And I just told you you’re handsome. I’m sorry, I bet that was embarrassing to… carry around, all this time.”
“It’s the best gift anyone’s ever given me,” he says honestly.
“I didn’t think you’d be so pretty,” you explain.
“I knew you would be.”
You hold your hand out. He’s about to tell you he doesn’t shake but he finds he really wants to, and you’re not shaking his hand anyways, you’re holding it, looking at the cursive on his arm with a disbelief he echoes in his own smile. You rub the tip of your thumb over the word handsome.
“Do you like books?” he asks.
You nod distractedly. “I love them,” you murmur, looking up.
His entire arm is alive with tingles.
“Do you read much?” you ask.
Every word you trade with one another has this shy longing he’s never felt, like you’re desperate to know about one another but worried you aren’t allowed to ask. Spencer’s about to tell you all about it, how he’s always reading, how books have been with him through everything, but there’s a tug on his shirt that stops him.
“Hi,” the little girl says.
Spencer laughs. “Hi.”
“What did she say?” the little girl whispers.
Spencer looks to you for guidance.
“Of course you can have it. It’s an amazing book,” you say.
“Thank you!” she says, holding out her hands.
Spencer doesn’t mind handing it over. If she didn’t ask him for it earlier, he might’ve never had the courage to look for you. He could’ve left the book in the cabinet and turned around, but he didn’t. And now he’s met you.
You step into his side. “Did you– do you want to get coffee?” You peer down at the bag now slipped from his elbow down to his wrist. “Are you going somewhere?”
“Do you want to have a picnic with me?” he asks.
You nod for so long he has to laugh. “I’d love to,” you say, offering your open hand.
Spencer threads your fingers together. That one day he always dreamed of seems a lot closer than it did before.
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noxtivagus · 2 years
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i'll just ramble a bit again in tags ><
#🌙.rambles#🌙.vents#YEAH I DON'T THINK I SLEPT VERY WELL 💀#i rlly do hate being negative like this here i'll fix it sometime during the break but i'll cope rq by doing this before i do yeah#i'm v aware of how being negative affects others 😭 but like oh man it rlly isn't good to bottle things up either but#i don't really have anyone that i can vent to? i mean. i don't want to when i know that others have their own struggles too#i'd much rather listen to them. i'm fine on my own i just need to write it i think. so tumblr tags ily i'll fix my spam account soon fr#i write a lot to myself i talk to myself yeah i barely talk to others as much as i talk to myself. dumping someway somehow in#a place that only. those who rlly want to or seek to read this in some way wld know of the things i write. an interesting thought#i guess one way of putting it as well is i'm like the ocean. or the sky; which is. quite like an ocean too. with its depth#i mean i really just want to be authentic n myself but some experiences that hurt me stuck this sort of.. idk smth in me still that#subconsciously there's always this barrier there's always this. yeah. so one of my idk one of the things i struggle with is#do you know the real me? the me that you know that you like /p is it idealized? is it just the things i've done for you or#the image you have of me that you.. yeah? i hate that doubt bcs i do want to believe n when i do i. cry bcs that means a lot to me#I'M RAMBLING. hdfjaslkdfj :c i mean i'm human too n i'm not immune to doubt sob ffxiv has that one quote w minfilia that. rlly gives me hop#i grew up feeling lonely often despite still having friends. acceptance.. i relate to hermes a lot fr :c#i think i'm more honest here on tumblr than directly w others. yeah definitely. i'm more of a listener w others#oh god fr i think i feel especially helpless inside bcs there's sm things that just feel so similar to a certain time in my life i've#buried a bit. i genuinely don't remember the last few months of 2020 n early 2021 well at all i distracted myself from. certain stuff#listening to vg osts is such a comfort rn oh man. living legacy. don't think twice. radical dreamers. kiss me good-bye 🥹#i was gna write smth but i forgot. oh well i shld finish this article critique anyways so i'll work on that now
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rangerbarbz · 1 month
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Study Sessions
“Study Sessions”
Author’s Note: Had some time to start another blurb! (After reading Book of Bill I’m thinking about writing about Ford possessed by Bill idk) I hope y’all enjoy this one! Let me know what you think lovelies <3 EDIT: OH MY GOODNESS I DID NOT SEE ALL THE INBOX REPLIES I HAD I AM SO SORRRYYYY I HAVE SOME REQUEST IDEAS IN THERE I’D LOVE TO DO 
You had conquered every single class at Backupsmore with either an A or a B as your final grade. You wouldn’t say you were a genius by any means, but you took pride in your schoolwork and wished to graduate as soon as possible. This changed when you began taking physics. You had never been so stumped by a subject. The equations, the laws, and the Godforsaken labs were the bane of your existence. 
Your determined nature refused to let you fail, so you decided to ask your professor for help. He began doting on his star student Stanford Pines who had taken his class the previous semester and was excelling through the upper level classes. Your professor suggested reaching out to him because he had recently become a S.I. for the introductory physics and chemistry courses. He handed you a Post-It note with his name and the hours when he was going to be in the library. 
After your last class of the day, you strolled over to the library on campus, nervous for your first session. He was so smart and you were afraid that he would get frustrated with how little you understood this subject. You made your way to the S.I. lab on campus and tapped your knuckle on the wooden door that was open. There was no one at any of the tables, but there were scattered notebook paper scribbled on and a textbook open. 
“Hello?” you called, looking around for a sign of anyone. Suddenly, a head popped up from underneath the table. He had ruffled brown hair and black, square glasses. 
“Hello!” the man replied, getting up from the floor. “Sorry about that. I had dropped my pen before you walked in.” He then sat on the rolling chair and scooted it closer to the table. “I’m Stanford, but you can call me Ford. I assume you’re here for physics help?” 
You smiled. “I’m Y/N. Nice to meet you, Ford. Yes, I am here for physics. My professor recommended you to me.” You placed your backpack on the floor and sat in the chair beside him. “I just want to go ahead and warn you, I’ve had trouble in this class. I hope I don’t frustrate you too much.” 
Ford chuckled. “Don’t be so hard on yourself. I know you’re a smart girl. Do you have any homework that needs to be completed?” You felt your face become warm. Smart girl. You enjoyed him calling you that. There was nothing quite like academic praise to a scholar. 
“Uh, yes I do actually,” you answered, not letting your train of thought derail. You pulled your binder from the first pocket of your backpack and set it on the table in front of you two. “It’s ten problems, so if I miss more than three of them that means I have a D,” you continued as you removed the worksheet from the rings. “I am shooting for at least a C in the class overall.” 
He grinned at you like he was happy about doing physics. “Well, I believe you’re going to get no less than an A in that class.” You laughed at his confidence in you. 
“I don’t know about that, but I appreciate it, Ford,” you replied, twirling your pencil between your fingers. You gazed into his eyes; the sunlight from the window brought out hints of gold in his dark brown irises. Wow, they were so pretty.
He then cocked his head to the side. “Pardon? Did you just say ‘pretty?’” he asked with a smile tugging at his lips. 
Your face immediately became hot. Oh my God you spoke out loud not meaning to. Okay how do you save this conversation. You laughed nervously. “Pretty excited to start learning that is! Ha! Let’s get started, please. I can’t wait!” you exclaimed, all in one breath. 
Ford nodded. “What a great attitude to have, Y/N!” He then picked up his pencil and began to explain the first problem to you. He was so good at going into detail about every little thing. He was patient with you as well which was good because he kept on distracting you. 
The more you focused on him, the more features you noticed. His glasses had scratches on the wire rims, he had a prominent, square jaw, and he had unkempt sideburns. He was so damn good looking it made you want to study thermodynamics forever if it meant you got to look at him. 
You had actually gone through the homework quicker than you thought you would, so Ford asked if you would want to practice some extra problems on the blackboard. Of course you agreed. You walked up to the board ready to write whatever he threw at you but feeling self-conscious about being the center of his attention like this. He was still sitting at the table reciting the equation back to you while you stood out in the open. You then pushed your insecurity to the side in order to show him you had actually learned something today. He carefully observed you as you wrote, watching the cogs in your brain turn. He also was watching the way your face contorted in concentration and the way your fingers tapped against the chalk tray. 
“Alright. I think I’m done, Ford.” You moved to the side so he could see your final answer. 
He smiled at you, putting his hands on his knees to get up. “Let’s see what ya got,” he responded, walking over to stand beside you. You didn’t realize when he was sitting how tall he was compared to you or how broad his chest was. He began to mumble under his breath, making sure there were no mistakes present. “Everything looks good Y/N!” He then turned toward you, his eyes meeting yours. 
“You know, you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself. Look at what you accomplished in just this short amount of time! If you keep on coming to my sessions, I know you can get through this class without worry.” Ford paused and looked back at the board, hands held behind his back. “It would make me happy to see you succeed.” 
You beamed back at him. Would it be inappropriate to kiss him right now? 
You (obviously) continued going to Ford’s S.I. sessions because your grade improved with each one you went to. You had also spent some time outside of the library together  by doing some photography of the wildlife around campus while Ford doodled in his sketchbook. People usually clocked him as an introvert, but he was not like that with you. He had opened up quite a bit to you about his past and what he wanted to do in the future. 
Today, you had met Ford on a bench outside his dormitory after your physics class had let out to share some good news with him. “Ford!” you called out. He looked up to see you waving a paper marked with an A+ in red ink. “Guess who got the highest grade in the class on the test last week?” you squealed. 
“Yes!” Ford said triumphantly, standing up quickly to pump his fists in the air. His sketchbook fell to the ground with some of the loose papers coming out. “I’m so proud of you!” You put your hands on his strong shoulders and jumped up and down. 
“Thank you thank you thank you! I’m just tickled pink right now,” you responded happily, bending down to pick up his drawings before the wind caught them. Ford’s face suddenly fell.
“Oh here I’ll get that,” he started, kneeling down on the concrete beside you. He was trying to pick up the papers that fell out as fast as possible, but you were faster. 
Your eyes grew wide as you picked up a paper with drawings of a woman reading a textbook, in a tree taking a picture of a bird, and one where she was just laughing. They were all you. Your breath hitched in your throat as you looked at them. They were so beautiful. 
“Y/N I’m so sorry. I- I can explain,” Ford stammered. “I- I have…liked you for a while now. You just are always on my mind, so I end up drawing you sometimes.”
“I like you too,” you cut him off. 
His face was flushed beyond belief. “I, well, uh-” 
“I’m going to kiss you now,” you stated. Ford’s eyebrows lifted as you closed the gap between you with a sweet kiss. He let out the tiniest sigh at the contact, his eyes fluttering close. You held his face in your hands and separated your lips from his to see his reaction. He was still blushing with a goofy smile on his lipstick stained face. 
“That was nice. Should’ve done that sooner,” he joked. You giggled and began to kiss him rapidly on his cheeks and forehead. You had left red stains of your lips with each smooch you gave him. 
“Yeah, you should have, smart guy.” He rolled his eyes and held your chin between his thumb and index finger to pull you in for another kiss. You smiled against his lips.
“I can’t wait to tell Fiddleford about this,” Ford murmured. 
“ And I can’t wait to see Fiddleford’s reaction to my assault on your face,” you laughed.
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