#have I said how much I adore lae’zel

[painhungry]

I feel as if this is her general attitude for practically the whole first act

[missblissy]

Little Things! Astarion x Reader HCs

A/n: 😤😤 I’m just gonna say it, ya’ll don’t have enough casual domestic relationship headcanons in these tags. To much smut. Y’all need some water, come up for air or something good god I love y’all but drink some fucking water 😂 So have some HCs of Tav and Astarion in Act 1. GN! Tav with no class/race as always UwU Also thank you so much for all the likes and kind words on my last post! I plan on opening my requests soon so be sure to follow to stay updated on when that happens. 💖☺️ Enjoy!

Was it even possible for someone to be annoyed… and pleased at the same time? Could a contradiction even exist? Yes. It could. And it baffled Astarion. Sure you had a pretty face, a nice laugh, a way with words… A shimmer in your eyes… a crooked grin that barely broke a smirk… The faint and unmissable sound of your heart beat… A smell so signature he could pick it up in the subtle breeze.

Just with the shift of wind and now he was tossing and turning in his tent. Huffing and throwing his blanket over half his face. Thoughts racing with you now, all the way on the other side of camp and no where near him. Not even in his sight. And still you were in his mind.

How annoying. This was just a misguided, maybe even a malicious attempt at forging an alliance. So why did he feel so… bad? His red eyes couldn’t close so he just stared at the fabric wall of his tent. A blank but also bitter stare on his face.

Out of all the books he read, and he read a lot, none of them actually showed him what real was. What was real passion? Not the mask he wore. What was real conviction and adoration? All he knew was what he’s done for centuries. And this was nothing but uncharted and unfamiliar territory.

So why was it your delightful and diluted scent in the wind alone just enough to send him reeling? He couldn’t know, or didn’t dare to wonder.

These little things didn’t stop there. During the day you’d bounce up to him with a skip in your step… that equally would send a skip right into his ribs and tore up his lungs. With big bright eyes you’d show him something random, something you found, something you made… it didn’t matter.

Just the way you beamed with a radiant smile the sun could be jealous of, it was enough for a snide back handed comment that could be confused for a flirt, “Oh darling, for me? You shouldn’t have, you might just be one of my most devoted fans,” Normally a line like this worked. Either it would send the conversation towards the bedroom or someone left standing alone.

Neither happened. You just rolled your eyes, gave a little laugh and said, “A fan? In your dreams,” And go on chatting like before, unfazed by his little remarks. You were an enigma to him.

Especially during times after a battle. It was always such a gentle touch, when you’d place a hand on his shoulder and praise him for his good work and efforts in the battle.

If vampires had blood to blush he would. He didn’t understand why he wanted to hear more of it, “That was a good job you did out there today,” or maybe it was the way you said, “You did amazing,” He could listen to praises all day. He never knew how much he enjoyed them before.

Let’s not forget, he could hear your heartbeat. Not yours alone. Everyone had a different rhythm and rhyme. For instants Shadowheart, her heart was slow, sad, faint but still beating away with life. Astarion could hear it, just the same as Lae’zel who seemingly had no heart beat at all until the surprising thumb of it came every hour or so. He could hear yours too. Rattle away within your bones. And he paid close attention.

Normally these ‘skills’ of listening to hearts were used to hunt out a target for his master. But with no master and a band of fools, he still used these skills unbeknownst to himself.

He’d listen with eyes glued to a book. You’re heart pitter pattered like any other. But sometimes it’d start racing, picking up speed. Not to long ago a racing heart was the first step into picking a target, since the heart never lies and when a fool looked Astarion’s way if their heart sang that song he knew who would be his unfortunate soul.

But no, this time he just peered from over his book and watched you stare off into the distance, into the darkness of the woods. To his surprise there wasn’t a glance his way or even at anyone. Your heart only raced for fear it seemed. Even when you looked at him or shared a conversation, the same steady beat flowed.

It was something little like this, these little things only he knew as they festered in his mind. They ached within him. He hid it well but it wretched at his organs and plucked at his fibers every time. It was annoying. It was… wonderful…

It was terrifying. The way his breathe would catch when you’d ask him to join you. The way he actually felt anger, as petty as it was, when you asked him to stay back at camp.

Or maybe when he’d hear just the sound of your voice, distant on the other side of camp, muffled, not even loud enough to hear what you were saying but just enough to hear your voice. How strange that something so little as that was enough to ease him into sleep.

[eclecticqueennerd]

Cat-Tastrophe

Gale/gn!Tav

SFW, no warnings

Tav lay in their combined bedroll in Gale’s tent, clutching their stomach while Gale rubbed small circles on their back. A wave of nausea ripped through Tav, which caused them to reach out to the makeshift vomit bowl to dry heave.

“Perhaps my love, you should stay in camp.” Gale spoke softly. Tav groans and turns to face Gale.

“Ugh, but who’s going to lead the group? The quest and party have already been planned.” Gale reaches forward to place a finger under Tav’s chin to make them look at him. Gale leans forward and places a soft kiss on their sweaty, feverish forehead. He pulls back, eyes brimming with love, adoration, and mild concern for Tav’s current state.

“I’ll carry that burden for you darling. You stay here and rest.”

“Are you sure? You know how Astarion can get when you try to take the lead.”

“My love, anything I can do for you, consider it most enthusiastically done. Let me handle it and all of Astarions… quirks.” Gale huffed out a chuckle while he looked down lovingly at Tav. Tav thought about it for a few minutes, and then another wave of nausea hit.

“Okay.” They said once the impulse to vomit subsided. Gale leaned forward and kissed Tav’s forehead again.

“I love you.”

“I love you too. Be safe out there.”

“I will. Now get some rest and stay hydrated.” With a wave of Gales hand, Tav’s flask filled with water. With a kiss to the top of Tav’s hand, Gale exited the shared tent.

*

Tav dipped in and out of sleep. The setting sun now poured its rays into the tent. Tav cracked their eyes and blinked at the cloth roofing over their head. Overall, they felt much better, but now their body was exhausted from the short-lived stomach bug they had acquired. Turning over in their bedroll, they were met with a view of a long-haired brown and grey tabby curled up sleeping next to their pillow.

“Oh… hello.” Tav uttered. The cats eyes opened and it began purring loudly. Tav sat up and the cat followed suit, leaving the side of the pillow and stretched its way over. The friendly feline approached Tav and rubbed against their side and back.

“Well, aren’t you friendly?” Tav reached out and offered their hand to the cat. The cat leaned forward, licked the side of their finger, and then rubbed the side of its face against Tav’s hand. Tav scratched the cats cheeks and under its chin, while the cat purred loudly, its tail flitting back and forth quickly. Tav gave a few pats to the top of the cats head and then stood up from the bedroll. They opened the tent flap and they heard a long, drawn-out meow. Looking back, they saw the brown and grey tabby cat sitting peacefully a few feet behind them, its eyes slow blinking up at them. Looking around, Tav saw a white, short-haired cat standing in front of them. This cat appeared to be trying to get Tav’s attention.

“Hello to you too.” Tav chuckled as they reached down and offered their hand for an introduction. The white-haired cat hisses and swats at Tav’s hand. Tav pulled back their hand quickly to prevent getting scratched.

“Ah! Naughty little…” Tav quickly stood up as they watched the white-haired cats eyes narrow, it looked like it was about to pounce at Tav. Tav took a sidestep and saw a large ginger tabby cat come trotting up to them, chattering. The new cat rubbed against Tav’s legs, wrapping its tail against them and meowed. Every time the ginger tabby passed in front of the white-haired cat, the white-haired cat would swat and hiss at the ginger tabby. Tav looked behind them and saw that the brown- and grey-haired tabby was now out of the tent, tail curled up next to its side still slow blinking. Then, Tav saw another large, red long-haired cat trotting up,

‘What’s with all the cats?’ Tav asked themselves. It was as if they spoke the question aloud, because Lae’Zel approached and said,

“It appears they’ve been morphed into cats.”

“They?” Lae’Zel rolled her eyes.

“Our companions.” Tav looked at the four cats in front of them. Tav turned their attention to the brown- and grey-haired tabby and asked incredulously,

“Gale?” The cat stepped forward, trilled, and curled its tail in greeting. Tav sighed heavily, placing one hand on their hips and the other on the bridge of their nose.

‘Well, I needed more Speak With Animals potions anyway…’

*This is my first time writing a story where the reader is gender-neutral. I am open to suggestions to allow my writing to be more inclusive but please be respectful. Thank you!*

[moonselune]

yo! Love your fics! Was wondering if we can get a Lae’zel x Shadowheart nsfw fic? I see Lae’zel as being a good 5’4 with Shadowheart being 5’7. Maybe Shadowheart teases her for her size..? 👀👀

OOOOOoooooOOOOoooOOoooOOOooOOoo yes. Thank you so much for your support and love xox

Shadowzel | Not that short

The night was calm, the campfire's glow casting dancing shadows across the tents. Shadowheart and Lae'zel sat a bit apart from the rest of the group, their usual bickering softened into a more playful banter as their relationship had evolved.

Shadowheart leaned back on her hands, a mischievous glint in her eyes as she glanced over at Lae'zel. "You know, Lae'zel, it's rather cute how you have to look up at me sometimes," she teased, her tone light and teasing.

Lae'zel narrowed her eyes, a warning clear in her gaze. "Shadowheart, I have told you before—cease these remarks. They serve no purpose."

Shadowheart chuckled, clearly enjoying herself. "Oh, come on. It's just a bit of fun. You're not that short… just short enough to be adorable."

Lae'zel's jaw tightened, but she remained silent, choosing not to escalate the situation immediately. However, Shadowheart continued to poke at her height throughout the evening, finding amusement in the slight difference that Lae'zel seemed to take so seriously.

Later, when the rest of the camp had settled into sleep, Lae'zel approached Shadowheart, her expression a mixture of determination and irritation. "You think this is funny, Shadowheart? My height is no measure of my strength or my abilities."

Shadowheart, still in a playful mood, stood up, towering slightly over Lae'zel. "I never said it was. But you have to admit, it's kind of cute. You are like pocket sized! We could just put you in a little pouch and throw you out-"

Lae'zel's eyes flashed with a challenge. "-Enough! I warned you."

Without another word, Lae'zel grabbed Shadowheart by the wrist and dragged her to her tent, Astarion gave them an amused wave before returning to the book he stole from Gale. Lae'zel pulled her into the privacy of her tent. The sudden movement took Shadowheart by surprise, and before she could react, Lae'zel had her pinned against the bedroll, her grip firm but not painful.

"Lae'zel, what are you—" Shadowheart began, but her words were cut off as Lae'zel's lips crashed against hers in a demanding kiss. The force of Lae'zel's passion took Shadowheart's breath away, and she found herself melting into the kiss, her teasing forgotten in the heat of the moment.

Lae'zel pulled back slightly, her breath hot against Shadowheart's ear. "You think you can tease me without consequence? I will show you what it means to provoke a Githyanki warrior."

Before Shadowheart could respond, Lae'zel's hands were roaming over her body, expertly removing her armor and clothing with an urgency that sent shivers down her spine and had her squeezing her thighs in anticipation. Lae'zel's touch was both demanding and reverent, her fingers exploring every inch of Shadowheart's skin with a mix of tenderness and possessiveness that boarded on cruel as Shadowheart yearned for more.

Lae'zel's smaller frame moved with a grace and power that belied her size, and Shadowheart couldn't help but be swept away by the intensity of her lover's actions. Her mouth found its way to Shadowheart's neck, leaving a trail of fiery vengeful kisses down to her collarbone, each sure to leave a mark in the morning.

Shadowheart moaned softly, her hands tangling in Lae'zel's hair as the Githyanki warrior's lips continued their journey downward. Lae'zel's hands followed, caressing and kneading Shadowheart's breasts before moving lower, eliciting gasps of pleasure from the cleric.

"Lae'zel… please," Shadowheart breathed, her voice just pure desperation.

Lae'zel smirked against Shadowheart's skin, her fingers teasing the edge of Shadowheart's core. "Admit it, Shadowheart. Admit that my height is irrelevant when it comes to making you feel this way."

Shadowheart whimpered, her body aching for more. "Fine… you win. You're not that short."

Lae'zel's fingers finally delved into Shadowheart's wetness, drawing a sharp cry from her lips. "Say it again," Lae'zel demanded, her voice low and commanding.

Shadowheart's mind was a haze of pleasure, her body arching into Lae'zel's touch. "You're not… that short," she repeated, her voice trembling.

Lae'zel's pace quickened, her fingers working Shadowheart to the brink of ecstasy. "One more time?"

"You-ah! You aren't that short!"

Shadowheart's arch backed and her vision went white as she came on Lae'zel's fingers, "Ha, that is what I thought, but worry not, we have the entire night for you to make up for your transgressions."

And the night they had, it was filled with Shadowheart's cries of pleasure as Lae'zel continued to drive her higher and higher, each wave of ecstasy more intense than the last. By the time the sun began to rise, Shadowheart was a trembling, satisfied mess, her body spent from the relentless pleasure Lae'zel had bestowed upon her.

Lae'zel lay beside her, a satisfied smile on her lips as she brushed a strand of hair from Shadowheart's face. "Remember this the next time you think to tease me," she whispered, her voice soft but firm.

Shadowheart nodded weakly, her body still buzzing from the night's activities. "I will," she promised, thought only an hour after she recovered, she asked Lae'zel if she ever tried to pass as a gnome before.

[meowsgirldrawing]

Princess vs Prince (Astarion x Gn-Tav/Reader) WIP

I got 6 pages of this so far HA-

Prompt: The ragtag gang of tadpole holders saves a princess (daughter of a grand duke) from a miserable fate by a monster, then decides to help escort her back to her town. Astarion didn’t mind any of this, but after weeks since his and Tav’s exchange of real affections and confessions, he’s not too keen on allowing her fluttering eyelashes and obvious thing for hero’s to go on any longer.

(Aka-Astarion doesn’t like to share and wants to be the only “royalty” Tav adores)

(Aka-he’s jealous)

Why am I calling Astarion a prince? Because he acts like it besides the gore and vampy stuffz. Plus it makes a fun title.

Note: Tav is a tiefling in this, because I love tieflings so much, but I'm trying to keep it mostly open so people can imagine their Tav's easier. More or less a little self-indulgent on my part.

“Let’s save the little princess, they said!” 

“It’ll be harmless, they said!”

Astarion bristles, leaned up on the tough wood pole that holds up his tent. The pure white pup beside him pays no attention, his gnawing noisy and breaking the air occasionally with happy whimpers. “I mean really??” He manages to keep his words low-ish, but his hand movement, flaring up in mock dismissal, is rather the opposite. “Who does that little minx think she is?-”

“GO WYLL, GO!” Karlach’s booming voice interrupts him. Loud enough that Scratch finally peers up, tail wagging. Oh so you’ll ignore me but as soon as the big fire lady says one word-

Not that Scratch really needs to listen anymore, Astarion trails off, finally resuming on the scene before him. The scene he was so diligently watching for a few reasons only before his disgust came filtering in.

Gale steps up, settling in beside Karlach,  “Do we really need to do this?”

“Have a little fun, Gale,” Tav huffs lightly, playfully, as they snatch up another log and set it up in the stump, axe glinting in the sunlight from their hand.

“Of course we do! Since Tav thought it was oh so wise to comment-“

“It was just a joke, Wyll-“ They try.

“On my “princely-ness” I must show them exactly how prince-like I can be!” His shirtless chest puffs up in confidence, or faux bravo as Tav rolls their eyes and sighs. And that is through a friendly log-chopping competition apparently.

“Tsk’va-“ Lae’zel settles up next to Gale’s side, her eyes focused on the pile beside the two morons. “As long as we get firewood, I don’t care how it’s done.”

Tav nods, grateful “Thank you, sweet Lae’zel. See Gale, it’s harmless my guy!”

Lae’zel does her dismissal words, rolling her eyes. The friendliness form of ‘no problem’ a Githyanki, at least their favorite one, can offer apparently. 

What? No, the competition is certainly not Astarion’s source of disgust. The sight of a bare chested, years of fighting showing in rippling muscles, Wyll going against their broad-shouldered, built in both structured and height Tav, whose upper half is covered by a mere tank top. That is absolutely not it. If anything, he could sit there all day watching both go at it like morons over a simple joke. 

And no, it’s not how he can clearly see the others taking in the sight as well. Gale watches in more amused confusion compared to most, but if you looked harder, his eyes are certainly not straying from either’s form. 

Karlach’s tail wags lightly, while her eyes glim with her hearty laugh. Perhaps if she wasn’t already burning up from her engine, she’d probably be visibly burning up in another way. Still, her focus is on Wyll, amused and thoroughly intrigued.

Lae’zel’s possibly the only one who isn’t doing much leering, but she isn’t so innocent. She goes from watching their forms swing down the axes on Tav’s call to being unable to take her eyes off Tav’s arm stretching out for another log. She huffs but does nothing more besides crossing her arms.

He can’t blame them, not at all, his Tav alone is a sight to behold. Not to mention their overall friendly and sweet persona that takes no real effort, a gentle giant is what he’s heard multiple times by Shadowheart. Added with Wyll, an admittedly gentleman despite his profession at slaying off monster heads, his demeanor also alone can melt the strongest of hearts. 

Pair them together, and you got a nice show to sit back and enjoy. Especially with the banter thrown left and right.

“Ready to give up, Tav? Even by your tail I can tell you’re struggling.” He grins, eyes crickling in mirth.

Tav scoffs, their tail adjusting the log before swinging back to behind them.

“Try me, warrior boy. I’m just getting started!”

“Well-” At the next call, both heave up their axes and slit the wood in two. 4 more added to their respective collections. “So am I, my friend!”

Astarion’s lip quirks, but then turns into a full frown as soon as he hears it again.

A high pitched giggle.

A little ways behind the two competitors, there sits a young woman in a fair and fluttery day gown, dark long locks curled over her shoulder, manicured and well cared for hands trail near her full and red lips as she giggles out her response, “You’re doing just amazing, both of you!”

But her eyes stay on Tav. His Tav.

His lip curls, eyes piercing from the other side of the camp.

There she is, the little princess he and his group just so happen to come across when dealing the final blows on a goblin camp. Annalisa, or rather, Lady Annalisa-Daughter and heir of Duke Salton. Who just so happens to be from the town they planned to head to next before her untimely landing into their group.

[azuremosquito]

Gratitude.

It was not a concept with which Astarion had much experience. Two hundred years of seducing people and luring them to their deaths for his master lent itself more to resentment and hatred. But this gratitude thing was rather nice.

Sure, he had saved Halsin for selfish reasons, of course - he had a mindflayer worm in his head and he did not fancy losing his good looks to tentacles, thank you so very much - but in doing so, Astarion and the other survivors of the crashed nautiloid had also cleared the road to Baldur’s Gate for the tiefling refugees and restored peace to the druid’s grove. The refugees had been so elated, they’d insisted on joining the camp for the night and celebrating properly.

Properly, it seemed, included a great deal of wine. The vampire had already had several bottles and mugs thrust into his hands from people who gazed at him like… like… some sort of hero.

At first it had alarmed him, his finely honed self-preservation senses tense and wary. Surely this was some sort of trap or ploy. He mustn’t lower his guard for a moment because that was how people ended up as vampire food. He should know because he’d been very good at it.

But these happy faces around the campfire seemed… genuine. He didn’t know what to make of it. All these innocents smiling at him, unafraid. Old habits urged him to lure them off in secret one by one but… Cazador wasn’t here. Astarion, for the first time in two centuries, was free.

And he had to admit, it felt good to have these people looking up to him. Very good. In fact, he could quite get used to this sort of adoration. He deserved nothing less, if he were being honest with himself. Although, it did admittedly have some downsides. He thought back to Lae’zel’s ‘proposition’ and a shudder squirmed its way down his spine.

While he had been forced to seduce women and men alike to feed Cazador’s insatiable hunger, he had a preference for male companionship, and certainly none that sounded quite so violent as Lae’zel had hinted at.

“You should be out there mingling. Everyone wants to celebrate with you,” a quiet voice spoke somewhere behind and above him.

Astarion felt another tremor through his body. How had a man as big as Halsin managed to sneak up on him in utter silence? Rearranging his face into a flirtatious smirk, the pale elf turned in place and gazed up at the taller man through his eyelashes. “I was looking for you, actually.”

Halsin was a giant of an elf, towering over him (and everyone else, for that matter), with arms like muscled tree trunks; Astarion was fairly certain those arms were bigger around than his waist, and the thought sent a tingling heat to his loins. Halsin was a powerful man who commanded respect, a renowned healer who led with fairness and kindness, not through fear and domination. And yet, Astarion had seen firsthand how ferocious the druid could be in a fight, when something he cared about was threatened.

Here was a valuable ally, if only he could properly ingratiate himself with the gentle giant. Astarion had been flattering Gale previously; what better source of protection than an eminently powerful and skilled wizard, one who had caught the eye of a very goddess? And then the blasted man had gone and revealed that he was a walking bomb, disgraced by said goddess. Astarion had enough problems without adding that to his list.

He purred at Halsin, taking a step closer into the big man’s personal space. “I thought we could find ourselves a little privacy. Get to know each other better.” He waited a beat before dangling the carrot. “Or, perhaps there’s something else you’d rather do besides talking?” The flirting came easily to him, as natural as breathing had once been. A means to make himself useful. A way to protect himself.

He saw interest kindle in the tall druid’s eyes, felt the man take a deep, steadying breath, his snug leather robes creaking around his barrel of a chest. A gentle smile played around the man’s lips as he gazed down at Astarion.

His words, however, were a gentle rebuff.

“Hmm… I’m sure there are. You strike me as extremely… resourceful. But there are many grateful people here who want to spend time with you. I must not keep you all to myself.” Astarion felt a sinking sensation in his gut, until Halsin added, “as enjoyable as that may be.”

Playing hard to get, was he? Astarion generally chose easier marks but something about this massive bear of a man called to him. Certainly, ingratiating himself with Halsin would have many advantages, not the least of which was having his very own resident healer with a great deal of knowledge about these damned illithid tadpoles squirming around in their heads.

No, he could be patient.

In the meantime, he rather thought he could go enjoy being adored.

“Some other time, then.” With a last, lingering glance at the druid, Astarion left the shadows and rejoined those gathered around the campfire in celebration.

[wellthebardsdead]

Did a doodle of my pretty tiefling twink and cleric of Selûne, Falûne. I forgot how much I enjoyed shading lips over doing an outline, his nose was fun too, its not the usual soft look I’d go for for a character like him but it’s a strong yet oddly romantic shape.

Curly White hair neatly tucked back, Big silvery white eyes, gold grafted horns, very pale pastel blue skin, always glossy and very kissable blue/grey lips, shorter than Astarion, heart shaped tail because he’s full of love.

He’s very kind, gentle, sheltered and naive. He left the safety of his cloister in baldurs gate to take up his studies at the now ruined chapel to Selûne near the now blighted village and immediately got kidnapped by absolute cultists. After escaping the nautiloid things continued to just go downhill for the poor thing. Everyone keeps bullying him and the pretty vampire keeps drinking his blood and corrupting his mind into indulging in sinful activities. Yes I made him specifically for ascended astarion to absolutely ruin him~

Relationships with others:

Shadowheart: low, she keeps bullying and threatening to hurt him for being a selûnite when he’s never said a thing remotely mean towards Shar. Has made him cry more than once.

Lae’zel: very high, she said she wanted to taste him and he got so frightened he fainted, he thought she wanted to eat him.

Gale: exceptional, when channeling the weave he thought about holding gales hand and having never had a crush before got so flustered he ran away in a panic. It took several hours for him to stop blushing.

Astarion: exceptional, Astarion clocked his gentle and naive nature from a mile away and manipulated him fully to his advantage, but then developed feelings for him, really, quickly and Falûne did so likewise. After luring him to a quiet place for some fun astarion so gently untied his collar and had a nibble while he made the cleric scream out his gods name for an entirely new meaning~ yes astarion holds him by his tail.

Wyll: very high, Wyll sees him as a best friend and a little brother figure.

Karlach: very high, sees him as an almost son like figure as well as a friend and wants to protect him. She calls him moonpie.

Halsin: High, he finds Falûne to be very good company and enjoys teaching him what he knows. Falûne on the other hand likes Halsin in his elf form, but is cripplingly terrified of his bear form and bears in general… they’re why his horns are grafted.

Minthara: Very high, after being rescued from moonrise her disposition towards him improved massively very fast and she found admiration in a surprising number of his aspects. Falûne however is extremely intimidated by her and her attempts at flirting scared him half to death.

Jaheira: high, she admires him but will rarely admit it. He keeps going despite his fear and keeps trying to do the right thing. She is keeping a firm eye on how astarion can easily sway him though. Falûne admires her likewise but Astarions convinced him she’s not as good a person as he thinks given shes threatened him repeatedly and drugged him.

Minsc: high, minsc thinks he’s adorable, so does boo. Falûne is often left too rattled by how loud and abrupt minsc is to walk away with any impression of him other than he’s nice and he’s loud. And boo is very cute.

Volo: dead, the whole group let him get killed for chasing Falûne with an ice pick.

Withers: very high, he admires Falûne and likewise Falûne admires him. They both enjoy tea and little sandwiches.

Raphael: high, it wasn’t hard for the devil to sway the poor cleric, especially since astarion wanted to make a deal. He’s still trying to convince him to join him and Harleep in the bedroom. Falûne is petrified at the mere thought of being around him because of how hard it is to say no to him.

[galebrainrot2024]

GalexTav Enemies to Lovers Part 21

A short one because my brain is a little toasted :( I have guests coming this weekend and will be traveling again for work next week so I will be cranking out as much as I can in the mean time or weird inbetween! I appreciate you all <3

I’m also going to stick with Gale’s POV - this story isn’t about Tav (it is, but you know what I mean lol) thanks @laserlope for helping in the brain room 🤝

EDITED TO GALE’s Perspective | Read on Ao3 | Master List

“Ah,” Gale said, leaning over Tav’s shoulder to point towards what appeared to be an alter. 

They were exploring the cellar of Last Light after fighting off a particularly difficult gaggle of meanlocks. During their explorations they found a journal, and decided to have a gander at finding the resistance at Last Light. 

“A hidden shrine…” he murmured, “Dedicated to the Moon Maiden herself. Even amidst the darkness, Selunites are stubborn enough to cling on.” It was a sentiment he understood. Despite everything that Mystra forced him to endure, he still cherished magic because it was what he adored and had known so long as he’d had memory.

“Pretty beautiful, isn’t it?” Karlach mused, brushing her fingers over the lacy cloth of the alter and cold, forgotten statues. Gale loved watching her experience the world around her - it helped him maintain perspective, to see the world through fresh eyes. To remember what wonder there was in simplicity.

To grapple with life’s end is no easy feat. There are many who avoid the task entirely, choosing instead to delay the inevitable. Gale felt the crushing weight of finite time and couldn’t bear to ignore his deepest desires. It had been so long since he felt these delicious emotions. What he felt for Mystra.. it was nothing like this.

“If you have a fondness for paperweights,” Shadowheart crossed her arms and inspected the arms of her armor, disinterest evident. Gale internally scoffed, mumbling about how deeply entrenched she was in Shar’s vile, false prophecy.

Karlach snorted and gave Shadowheart a salute. “You’re a funny frog, you know that?” 

“Excuse me what?” Shadowheart bristled and glared at Karlach, though a curl tugged at her lip. “If anyone here is a frog, it most certainly isn’t me. If anyone, it would be Lae’zel.” 

“Why, because she’s green?” Karlach poked, egging her on. 

As the two volleyed back and forth, Tav turned to Gale. She was shifting awkwardly, something he flagged to secure and unwrap later. “Sometimes I can’t tell whether or not those two like each other.” 

“Oh, I’m sure most of our companions could say the same about us.” Gale grinned and flashed his teeth, the corners of his eyes scrunching. His cells surged from their proximity. 

“Well,” Tav chewed on her bottom lip and pressed a finger to his chest. “Perhaps they wouldn’t have the wrong idea if you were better at admitting defeat once in a while. I know it’s hard for you, to be around someone so much more charismatic, intelligent, funny…” 

“Scratch undoubtably stakes his claim to the limelight and acclaim that I have no chance competing with.” Gale rose a brow as if in challenge. He knew she was talking about herself, but he needed to see if she’d indulge him. To test the waters.

Gale had been testing the water for weeks now, to the point where Karlach told him that if he didn’t get on with it soon she’d jump Tav’s bones before he got the chance.

“You wouldn’t dare,” he said, half joking and mostly serious.

“I can,” Karlach shot him a look, pointing a finger cockily, “and I will.”

Although Gale thought she was kidding there was still a part of him that chewed on her seriousness.

She returned his look, a wildness spreading through him as he continued to neg her and at how wonderfully she responded. “Are you comparing me to our camp dog?” 

“Ah!” Gale’s hand flung to his forehead and he tapped his fingers against it before resting on his hip and then twisting to point at her. “You know what, you’re right, I should have known you were talking about yourself. An honest mistake. Scratch is quite popular amongst our merry crew of miscreants and scoundrels, you’ll have to forgive me. Had I known you were talking about yourself,” Gale’s fingers wrapped around her wrist to lower her finger from his chest. Tav’s breath caught and that little sound, an otherwise innocent, unremarkable noise gave Gale’s body everything it needed to know. “I would have said that is woefully untrue and I wonder if that tadpole has eaten through more than a fair share of that beautiful mind of yours.” He whispered haughtily. Tav exhaled sharply and rolled her eyes which made his cheeky grin somehow more smug. He loved watching her get more and more flustered by him, though if he felt her feelings were hurt he’d learned well enough to stop. Lately, though, she seemed to relish in it.

“This place is hard to bear. I hope we’re able to continue on our way soon..” Shadowheart interrupted their banter and Gale looked to Tav who seemed delighted by their delay, unbothered by the impatience of their most gothic comrade. 

“I know what you mean. Everything is so… dark, and musty.” Karlach’s nose wrinkled and she nodded towards the exit, shifting from foot to foot.  

“Oh, well I meant more the idols to a false goddess,” she gestured and then took off her glove, inspecting her hand. “but yes, the mildew and must leaves something to be desired.” 

“Hopefully I’m not contributing to the smell too much,” Karlach gave herself a quick sniff and rose her arm. “What do you think?” 

Shadowheart laughed and shook her head, “Hush you, stop fishing for compliments. I’m sure Dammon showers you with plenty already.” 

Karlach stuck out her tongue and grinned. “You know it, baby.” 

Gale admired how, despite learning of her almost guaranteed fate, Karlach was a formidable optimist. He was trying to mirror her attitude, though despondency chewed at his robes. “Alright, alright,” Tav said, gesturing. “lead the way.” 

“I love a nice secret hideaway, don’t you?” Shadowheart mused, glancing around the damp enclave. “Even if it’s dedicated to,” she shuddered as if eating bad fish, “Selune.” 

“I mean… I guess.” Tav and Karlach shrugged in unison. 

“You can just fill it with supplies, seal up the hidden entrance, and tuck yourself away from the world…” Shadowheart said this as if she were asking a djinn to grant her wish. 

“Whatever you say, squirrelheart.” Gale chuckled at his own joke and the two groaned at his joke and Tav surprised him with an earnest giggle. He grunted as he hoisted his pack. “Where are we headed, m’lady?” 

Tav blushed. Another clue. Gale knew when he spoke to her in that voice, although it was playful there was an undercurrent of words unspoken. He knew it was beginning to affect her concentration because she let more than a few errant spells slip anytime they locked eyes in combat. He’d give an extra flourish, put on a bit of a show, and then she’d get a little smile and forget to cast her ward. Gale felt guilty, of course, but it was a little endearing.

Still - What if she wasn’t receptive? What if it was all in his head relationships? He didn’t remember overthinking past relationships quite so much. Perhaps he did. Well, he nearly immediately admitted the fib to himself.

He also worried that if he acted impatiently, Tav would slip through his fingers like quicksand. There was a nagging in her gut, that he would somehow mess up.

Tav - apart from his mother, and Tara - was the person who knew him best - which wasn’t saying much. She had seen so much of him, though, had been invited into more intimate moments while he held everyone else at an arms length. It was easier than seeing them hold him at an arms length. He tried to find solace in the stars instead of substance on solid ground. Terrified of letting people past the well-crafted fortress to his heart. 

For the past few weeks as he tried, and failed, to teach her simple recipes he felt his resolve grow weaker and weaker. He thawed her, little by little the layers of herself peeling back to welcome him in. Jokes that once would make her gag in annoyance now evoked bubbles of laughter. They rarely spoke at first. Only a few snide comments here and there. 

As the days progressed, however, Gale started to ask her more questions, which he sensed annoyed her to an extent. Once that emotion passed due to his persistent verbosity and monologues about his own answers would she open up and reveal tidbits of herself - what foods she liked to eat, the flowers she noticed, how she liked to spend her time - the latter earning him a withering look, implying him to back away from the question, to which he smirked at and held up his hands.

“Hello?” Gale waved a hand in front of her face, realizing he’d been waiting for her response for quite some time. He noticed she laughed unintentionally and licked her lips before she pressed them together. It made his core simmer. 

“Sorry?” She said, tilting her head and scrunching her face a little. 

“Good! We were worried we lost you there - you just,” Gale pursed his lips and his eyes narrowed a little with excitement. He leaned forward and Tav’s lips parted as she inhaled. He tried to steady his wicked thoughts. He noted the soft red brushed across her cheeks, how her iris’s were swallowed whole. His voice slowed, his tone smooth and mellow, “Blushed a smidge, ah… just as you are now….and then froze, faster than you could conjure an ice storm.” 

The silence lingered, the hairs on his arms stood up and he felt magnified. And then she spoke. “No, regrettably you’re stuck with me for now. Don’t get too excited.” 

He did. She returned the retort exactly as he wanted. “Oh, if this adventure has taught me anything it’s that I’ve grown rather fond of you. I would be rather miffed for our paths to part so soon… there’s so much more to do.” 

Karlach and Shadowheart’s whoops of laughter drew a scowl from her and started walking. 

“Don’t be shy!” Karlach yelled to her and Gale laughed.

 Fine. He thought to himself. Tonight. Tonight.

[bloodycyrano]

In reference to my previous post, Here's team tadpole and their relationship with Gales kids.

Lae'zel: She will swear she doesn't like kids until she's blue in the face, and even request that they don't call her their Aunt, but if she hears one other little bastard kid is being mean to them? All bets are off. She's teaching these children the art of war- And she's only stopping at that because Gale and Karlach said she's not allowed to hit someone else's kid.- If you keep the Githyanki egg and Lae’zel raises the gith child at the end of your playthrough, the kids will play together.

Astarion: Is 100% teaching these kids bad words and how to pickpocket. He's surprisingly great with kids, even though he pretends not to like them much. He's secretly jealous that the kids call him "Mister Astarion" and not "Uncle Astarion", even though he's heard them refer Wyll, Halsin, Karlach, and even Shadowheart as Aunts and uncles.

Wyll: Wyll fuckin adores these kids. He and Karlach visit Gale regularly to check in on him and the little ones. The only issue is that when Durge and Astarion are visiting at the same time as Wyll, they're much more.. Mischievous. Don't ask for sugar in your tea, because it HAS been swapped with salt.

Karlach: Karlach is so fucking proud of Gale, and she wastes absolutely no time beaming about it, either. She loves the kids, she loves having extra excuses to visit, and she's just all around so happy that things worked out well and now she's got two little kiddos to spoil rotten if Gale lets her.- She cannot be allowed to go shopping with the kids, because she'll get them absolutely anything they ask for.

Durge: Durge has never really liked kids, but they can sympathize with any emotional or sensory issues they might have. Durge isn't particularly maternal/paternal in any way shape or form, but they are begrudgingly good with kids. They're proud of Gale, and as the kids get older, they do get much more protective. They also make sure the kids know the absolute most vulgar insults known to man should they need to use them, and if they ever have problems with their gender identity, durge knows first hand how to help and support them through it. (I headcannon durge to be nonbinary). Durge would kill for these kids, and isn't afraid to answer weird or morbid questions about death or how the world works.- Unfortunately, Gale did have to ban discussions about the decomposition process at the dinner table.

Shadowheart: Wine aunt. Shadowheart is a wine aunt, and apparently has experienced identity crisis hard enough to lift black hair to white overnight. Cool aunt Shadowheart is 100% prepared to take those kids out for some pampering and bring them back home with a new outlook on life. As much as Gale loves the rest of team tadpole, Shadowheart or Durge are the two he calls when his kids are having some big feelings he doesn't know how to help with.

[vitanithepure]

Favorite outfit

Here it is, my entry to day #1 of Wyllvember!

***

First days of traveling together were hectic and filled with so much uncertainty it all became a blur. People came in, made shelter at the camp you now call your home away from home. And only now, after all of you put some distance between yourself and the immediate threat, do you have time to take it all in.

You start noticing details, the mannerisms of your new companions, discovering their little quirks and habits. Like Lae’zel always being up first, starting the day with a series of training rituals, going on through motions she could probably do in her sleep. Or how methodically Shadowheart brushes and ties her hair each morning.

And then there is Wyll. He seems to be the most accustomed to life on the road. From the way he swiftly puts up his tent, to how organized were his amenities, how little clutter he carried around. The same couldn’t be said about his wardrobe. It was practical, yes, the Blade of Frontiers wore leathers that allowed ease of use, allowed for good maneuvering with his choice of weapon and provided decent protection in battle.

This practicality clashed with the frills adorning his clothing, the golden clips and buckles. They didn’t seem to serve any purpose, but certainly gave Wyll a distinguished look. A very odd choice for someone styling himself the champion of the common folk. Yet far be it for you to judge, for he really is an undeniable force of good in this region of the Sword Coast.

“Tell me if I intrude upon your time, but that faraway look on your face tells me you could probably use the company this evening. And I wouldn’t mind it as well.”

You startle hearing Wyll’s voice so close, wondering if he took offense at your scrutinizing gaze. The smile he approached you with hopefully means no.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to stare. Go ahead, lots of room here by the fire.”

“I got the feeling you were looking through me, rather than at me, but either way, there is no need to apologize.”

He sits down next to you, and from this distance you can see more details on his outfit. The leather is obviously starting to wear out. It visibly took a lot of cuts and blows that were meant for the wearer, and the jerking underneath looks patched as well. On it, you notice, is a crest. It shows a merchant ship, sailing out on the sea. You recognize it. 

“Say, is that…Baldur’s Gate? On your chestpiece?”

Wyll looks down to touch the symbol. His smile widens in a way that makes you sure there are many good tales to be told about the place.

“Indeed, you are looking at a Baldurian, born and raised. Pride of the Gate, I like to think of myself, but that is a story for an entirely different evening.”

“You put a lot of attention to your outfit, this your favorite?”

“It kept me alive for a long while, so I guess it is only fair for me to keep using it. A life I led before this one taught me appearances do matter, but it’s hard to apply that when one travels the wilds as much as me.”

“And yet, you manage to make it work.”

He throws a playful look your way. It’s really not hard to notice the charm the man spreads around himself, but it’s not of the stifling kind. There is genuine affection and kindness to Wyll, one that you would not normally expect from a rugged monster hunter he makes himself to be.

“Glad I am to hear it! Now, I believe there are countless other things we can talk about apart from my choice of fashion, as flattering as you make it out to be.”

And it’s true, the conversation flows easily and freely between you two, long unto the night, until the chill of the night air forces you back to your tents. You count this evening as the most pleasant one since all of this happened, and you hope, as you fall asleep, not the last one spent talking to Wyll under the stars.

***

The favorite outfit in question is:

I absolutely adore him in it!

[eldritch-blasted-bagels]

Excuse my brain rot and the fact that I was a theatre kid BUT-

What Shakespearean Monologue I Want to See Each BG3 Companion Perform

Wyll

“O Soft, What Light Through Yonder Window Breaks” from Romeo and Juliet

Of course. There is no other option.

This man is a hopeless romantic and, I adore him, would not get the point of the play but would have so much fun playing Romeo.

Everyone in the cast would also be hopelessly in love with him.

(Bonus) “Once More Upon the Breech!” from Henry V

Oh this man would KILL this monologue. The battle cry? The rousing of his men against an impossible task? It’s what he was made to do, it’s what the character was built for.

Equal and opposite to how he’d absolutely slay as Romeo, he would make an amazing Henry.

Karlach

“O, Then I See Queen Mab Hath Been With You” from Romeo and Juliet

I almost, almost gave this to Astarion because I think he could also do it justice, but he already had two monologues.

Just… love u Karlach you can say whatever nonsense and I will nod along. Also absolutely ragging on your friend and getting carried away in the bit feels very in character for her.

I feel like she doesn’t really do acting but she would come support her friend’s productions however she could.

Astarion

“To Be Or Not To Be” from Hamlet

Hear me out; I think it would either be so over dramatic or the best damn rendition you’ve ever heard.

Contemplation of mortality, pain, existence? Astarion is at his best when he’s having an existential crisis.

This man was also just built to play Hamlet. You could replace this with “‘Tis now the very witching hour of night,” “O, that this too too sullied flesh would melt” Or any of his soliloquies and what I said still goes.

(Bonus) “Dost Thou Not Suspect My Place?” from Much Ado About Nothing

This is one of the best comedic monologues Shakespeare has to offer and I won’t be told otherwise

Specifically based on the line of Dogberry describing himself as a tasty piece of flesh while also being Dogberry and flouncing about, being hysterical, because someone called him an ass.

(Bonus 2) (Sorry this man is very Shakespeare coded) He would be such a good Puck in A Midsummer Night’s Dream. Just a little shit.

Gale

“O, She Misused Me Past the Endurance of a Block!” From Much Ado About Nothing

Just as I think Astarion was built to play Hamlet, Gale was built to play Benedick.

He’s just enough of an ass but also fucking comedic enough to pull this off and make it hysterical. Like Benedick, he also just keeps talking.

(Bonus) Lear’s Storm Monologues

I think at his worst, Gale could do Lear some fuckin justice in his performance of that specific piece, and that slow descent into madness.

Lae’zel

“I Would Eat His Heart In The Marketplace” from Much Ado About Nothing

It’s a take I’m so here for and I think she’d get really into scolding Benedick for being a dishonorable coward.

Just think about the potential delivery of “Oh! If I were a man! I’d eat his heart in the marketplace!” gives me chills.

I don’t ship Lae’zel and Gale necessarily but I think if you put them in a production of Much Ado together it would be cemented as a bar-standard production.

Shadowheart

“O What a Noble Mind Been O’erthrown” from Hamlet

She kins Ophelia and you can’t tell me otherwise. Also specifically, in this, the context of being used as a pawn by everyone in her life feels appropriate.

(Bonus) Let her play Joan of Arc in Henry VI. I don’t know why she’s so Joan of Arc coded in my brain but let her do it.

Halesin

“All the World’s a Stage” from As You Like It

This one is the one I’m least confident about but the world-weary and worn nature that it can take on feels very Halesin and I think he would do a performance in such a way that it sends you spiraling into an existential crisis.

(Bonus) Minthara

“And Dash’d the Brains Out!” from Macbeth

Again, I just think Minthara would kill as Lady Macbeth.

But, I don’t think “Out damn spot” would be where she shined; I think these moments of absolute murder and ambition would.

Also inspired by the production (in DC I think?) where they had to cut Lady Macbeth literally smashing a baby doll on rocks during this monologue because the audience found it too disturbing.

[slusheeduck]

Fictober 2023 Day 17 - Prompt: "Okay, show me." Fandom: Baldur's Gate 3

“Hey, Shadowheart.”

It took all of her effort, but Shadowheart pulled herself from her introspection to look up at Karlach. The tiefling gave her a hopeful little smile, and she sighed. “Sorry. I’m not going to be good company right now,” she said quietly.

“I don’t need you to be.” Karlach went in front of where she knelt, crouching down to sit back on her heels. “Can I show you something?”

Shadowheart glanced up, brow furrowing as she frowned. “What?”

“Well, you need to follow me for it.”

Shadowheart shut her eyes. “I’d really rather not,” she said. The weight of Shar’s disapproval was crushing, weighing down more than just her heart—her entire soul felt as though it were trapped under a rock. Needless to say, it hadn’t made her particularly sociable—Karlach’s boundless enthusiasm, she knew, would be grating if she went along with her.

“Hey.” Karlach’s voice was soft enough to coax Shadowheart to open her eyes again. Her face was sympathetic—not pitying, despite Shadowheart’s best efforts to interpret it that way—and she was quiet for a long moment, searching for the right words. “You don’t have to talk, if we go. You don’t even need to smile. Shit’s hard—I’ve…well, I’ve never been in quite your situation, I’ll admit. But I’ve dealt with more than my fair share of shitty situations, and I know that just…one nice thing can go a long way in helping you take that next step when you really just want to lay down and hope you never get up.” She gave a little smile. “And, honestly, I think you’ll be the only one to really appreciate it.”

Shadowheart looked over her for a moment. After a moment, she sighed. “Okay, show me.”

Karlach grinned, getting up to her feet. She waited for Shadowheart, then led the way out of camp. The didn’t go very far, just enough to get into the fields that surrounded them. Tulips grew among the wildflowers, tall and bright in the dying light of the sun. Shadowheart wanted to be offended by them, really, for daring to be so…happy in the face of her own misery, but she said nothing. She watched as Karlach seemed to be looking for…something.

“Ah! I knew they’d still be here,” she whispered, then gestured for Shadowheart to come join her. The cleric hesitated, but finally took a breath and braced herself. Looking at flowers really wasn’t…

Her eyes widened as she followed where Karlach pointed, right in one of the tulips. A little field mouse, tiny enough she could probably fit five in the palm of her hand, was fast asleep inside, like it was tucked up in a little red bedroll.

“See? I knew you’d like it,” Karlach whispered. “Isn’t he the cutest little thing? There’s a few others around, too—wouldn’t it be adorable if they were a little family?”

Shadowheart didn’t quite smile, but her lips tugged up ever so slightly. “It’s…it really is adorable,” she whispered. “Mice are actually my favorite animal.” She tugged her gaze away from the little mouse to look up at Karlach. “Thank you. This was…it was a nice thing.”

Karlach sent her a small smile in return. “Enough to help with that next step?”

Shadowheart’s eyes drifted back to the mouse. “It’s…helping. I don’t know how much.” She swallowed. “I’m sorry. I know you’re trying to help, but…”

“But, you’ll move forward in your own time. No one’s rushing you, and you’ve got tons of friends back there who are here to help.” The tiefling grinned. “And, if you want to move but can’t, ol’ Karlach’s more than willing to cart you wherever you want.”

Finally a smile—very small, very weak, but still there—flitted across Shadowheart’s mouth. “I…appreciate that. Very much.” She looked over the flowers, catching little noses poking out of a few of them. “You really don’t think the others would appreciate this?”

“Hells no.” Carefully, Karlach settled down on the ground, legs crossed. “Lae’zel would think it’s a waste of time unless we used them for target practice. Gale would probably have some…big lecture on mice in tulips—the druids probably would, too. Maybe Fal and Wyll would like it, but as a ‘oh yeah that’s cute’ thing. And Astarion? Pfft, just try imagining that one.” She grinned. “Maybe Withers would like it, but I still think you’re the only one who’d appreciate just how cute their widdle faces are like I do.”

Shadowheart smiled, this one slightly stronger, and she knelt down in the grass beside Karlach. “I do. Very much. Can we…stay out here for a little longer?”

“For as long as you’d like. And you don’t need to say a word unless you feel like it.”

Fictober 2023 Drabble Master Post

[haru-sen]

A Link in the Chain (NSFW)

This a Through the Gates of Horn and Oak AU oneshot. While dealing with Act II issues, Karlach invites Tav to join her and Dammon to blow off steam. For this AU, Tav accepts the offer, with Halsin's blessing. Also, this Tav is gender neutral, because experimenting.

Thanks @ada-melodies for the beta read.

CW: Bondage, threesome, sex, dirty talk, biting

Buying such a thing wasn’t a necessity. It was foolish to custom order then carry around something that did not increase your chances of survival. You were letting yourself get distracted by decadent comforts instead of prioritizing finding a cure-

You were apparently also channeling Lae’zel, which was never a good sign.

You immediately reevaluated your apprehension. You were in dire need of some personal time, and your main outlet since leaving the Grove was just battle. While it was an effective way of working out your unpleasant feelings, it often left you sore and cranky. You could die horribly any day now, and not only would you be dead, you would have died tragically pent-up. Simply awful.

Asking for this was going to be awkward though. And yet, Karlach had gone out of her way to loudly tell you about the things Dammon was making, as well as how much she enjoyed using them with him. She also jokingly invited you to join them, which Halsin insisted was not a joke. Given what you already suspected about the blacksmith, you weren’t going to scandalize him. But he would absolutely roast you for it.

And you knew, that Karlach wasn’t just sharing this as a brag. You were not ignorant of how the others looked at you and you were not unaffected by their admiration. The situation was dire, and you had been dealing with a lot. Perhaps you would take Karlach up on her invitation. There was a big difference between investing in your own burgeoning relationships, and guesting in another’s.

##

Dammon sipped his water, and grinned up at you from his seat on a crate. His look was far too knowing, and you understood that he and Karlach most definitely discussed her invitation. He patted the crate beside him, and you sat down, basking in the heat of the forge.

He watched you intently, those pretty blue eyes bright and lively. He leaned closer. “Karlach said I should expect you.” He gave you a demure smile, a little too earnest to be coquettish, but that was part of his charm.

“Oh? Why’s that?” you asked, keeping your tone casual.

His eyes widened and he swallowed awkwardly, suddenly frozen in place.

You gazed at him questioningly, like you honestly had no idea what he was talking about.

His cheeks flushed and he looked down, suddenly breathing hard. He hurriedly put his drink aside, hands balling into fists in his lap. Oh, he was adorable flustered.

“She uh...really didn’t say?” he stammered.

You shrugged, feigning confusion. A better person would have shown him mercy, but honestly, Dammon had been teasing you about your personal life since you met him in the Grove. He deserved to suffer a little.

You crossed your legs and stared expectantly at him.

“You uh...have something you wanted custom made?” he offered, looking around desperately, sweat beading around his brow.

“I do,” you said, maintaining a cheerful demeanor.

Dammon exhaled loudly, mustering a polite smile. “Of course, what would you like? New armor, weapon-”

“No, something like what you made Karlach,” you said, keeping your tone professional.

He cocked his head to the side. “Infernal engine parts?”

“The enchanted restraints,” you said.

Dammon stiffened. “Hells,” he breathed, eyes big. “Umm...yes, I can do that? I’ll need your input on the...specifications. The enchantments aren’t a smithing specialty, but I do know...several.” He met your gaze, cheeks flushed again. “I’m happy to go over them with you, if you aren’t certain what you want.”

“I know exactly what I want,” you said firmly. “And this is a commission, so I do expect some discretion.”

“O-of course,” Dammon murmured. He chewed on his bottom lip, looking like he wanted to say more, but unsure if he should.

You folded your hands in your lap, enjoying the spectacle. “And if you and Karlach want to help me test them out, that is another matter entirely. One I am open to trying.”

Dammon raised his head, his eyes dark, his breathing shallow. “By Tymora’s tits, Tav, you’re a vicious tease.”

You smirked at him. “You’re cute when you’re squirming.”

Dammon tilted his chin up. “I’m sure you will be too.”

Your brows went up. “Oh?”

“If you already talked to Karlach, then you know it’s a package deal, and maybe you’re just meant to be the filling in our tiefling sandwich.” He grinned at you smugly.

“Is that so?” you asked, resting one palm on your cheek. “Well, just to give me an idea of your interests, what don’t you want me to do?”

“I’m open to anything,” he said a little breathlessly, his smile wide. “But don’t worry, I don’t want to do anything that you don’t like. Neither does Karlach. We’ll be good to you.”

You laughed. Oh, that naive boy. He was darling. “I see. Well, let’s hammer out the details of the order, and then I’ll let you get back to work. We can discuss the demonstration later.”

He beamed at you, a little extra swagger in his step as he explained the available options, his tail occasionally brushing against you, his calloused fingers lingering on your arm.

Dammon was so eager to assure you that he would be careful with you, that sweet silly boy. The day some cute little civilian could overwhelm you was the day you would have to give up adventuring for good.

##

“He said “anything,” with absolutely no limits,” you said shaking your head as you finished your dinner at Karlach’s tent. “So that’s why I’m asking you instead of him.”

Karlach chuckled, crossing her arms. “I mean, he looks innocent, but he isn’t actually that clueless.”

“Uh-huh,” you said.

“So maybe he’s a little overexcited,” she laughed. Her gaze drifted for a moment. “Is this acceptable for…?”

“Yes,” you said. “At least, he says so. I guess we’ll find out if he means it.”

Karlach nodded thoughtfully. “For what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure he is actually fine with it,” you said. “And you?”

Karlach’s grin was positively devilish. “You already know the answer to that.”

Out of everyone, Karlach and Lae’zel were the two you trusted to keep intimate arrangements separate from your every day lives: Karlach because she could compartmentalize and Lae’zel because that’s just how she was. “He’s still not entirely used to receiving,” she said. “Fingers, my tail, his plug, but…”

“I have made many men cry with just my hands,” you smirked.

Karlach raised a brow, realizing exactly who you were referring to. “Pulling their tails doesn’t count.”

“Oh, I did more than that,” you winked.

Karlach eyed you speculatively. “You’re certainly aggressive lately.”

“Yeah,” you said, looking away for a moment. “Yeah. That’s why I’m trying to be really clear about the limits. I don’t want to overstep...but I’m also not in the mood to let your sweet sunshine boy top me. It didn’t sound like that was a requirement. Is it?”

“Oh no, not at all,” Karlach laughed and patted you on the back. “He’ll get over his disappointment.”

“So what does he like?” you asked.

“He likes bondage and some impact play, but you’re right, he is a novice.” Karlach sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck. “His eyes are bigger than his hole.”

You nodded. “Anything you think I should know? Rules?”

“He loves dirty talk,” Karlach said thoughtfully. “Go light on the degradation though. Nothing about being a tief. I know some people like that, but-”

“Understood.” You nodded somberly. You certainly knew why it would be poor manners to tread that territory without express invitation. “So if I want to punish him...and I do, how does this sound?” You told Karlach your thoughts.

She cackled, clearly delighted. “This is not going to go the way he expected.” She put an arm around you. “And what about us?”

“I’m open to trying things,” you said, tilting your head back to look at her. “But I’m no sweet blushing blacksmith.”

“That much,” Karlach said, her tail sliding along your thigh. “Is very obvious.”

##

“I didn’t know this was down here,” Dammon said as you finished lighting the torches and securing the room. Out here you could prioritize privacy, comfort, or security, and you rarely got more than one of them. But after you cleared the secret rooms branching off the cellar, well, you at least had privacy and security.

Karlach, the unsinkable romantic, brought a basket of blankets, a picnic lunch, and candles. It was more planning than she usually demonstrated.

Dammon was out of his smithing leathers and dressed down in a soft sage green tunic and brown pants. He carried a backpack, and he looked around the hidden room with clear interest.

You stretched lazily, cracking your neck as you looked over the wooden table. You went to sit on it and Dammon came to join you.

“So did you want to try it on?” he asked, watching you with a wide smile, a lock of wheat blonde hair falling loose from his bun.

“I think it’s your job to demonstrate how well your creation works, Dammon,” you said, clicking your tongue. “I can’t be the one wearing it if I’m supposed to learn how to use it.”

Dammon coughed, his eyes getting very big as he looked between you and Karlach.

“It’s a good point, Blue,” Karlach said cheerfully. “You’re going to have to show us how it’s done.”

Dammon’s breath caught. “I-I see.” His cheeks flushed as he slowly opened the bag.

You reached over, gently brushing your fingers against the nape of his neck. “That is, if you’re comfortable with it?”

Dammon leaned into your touch, still smiling. “Of course. Karlach’s here.” He looked up at her, dewy-eyed and eager, the intimacy of that expression making your chest clench.

“Karlach’s an excellent protector,” you said agreeably. “What’s your safe word?”

“Crucible,” he said, breath hitching. “Triple tap if I can’t speak.”

You nodded.

Dammon handed you a reel of fine black chain, the links no bigger than your fingernail. There were three attached cuffs branching off the chain. You unwound the restraints, admiring the light weight and the fine craftsmanship.

“The cuffs resize to fit the wearer when you activate this glyph,” he said, pointing to a symbol engraved in the metal. “The emergency release is here.” He pointed to a tiny latch located on the edge of each band. “But you can say “solvo” if you’re otherwise occupied.” The cuffs immediately clicked open.

“Very nice,” you said, running your nail along the release.

“The chain lengthens up to five meters, as long as you keep pulling and the cuffs aren’t shut. Oh, you can change appearance as well with prestidigitation.” He activated the enchantment, and the chains went from black to silver to gold to white to a distinct shade of azure, one that matched his eyes.

“I think the blue looks nice.” You were not a fan of silver chains, not any more.

Dammon nodded, then looked at Karlach for reassurance.

She was drinking a tankard of beer, watching you both with eager eyes and a sharp smile. “Enough talking. Let’s see how it works.”

“Are you going to strip? Or do you want me to unwrap you?” you asked him with a toothy smile.

Dammon considered it for a moment, then pulled his shirt off and began unbuckling his belt. He fumbled twice before actually unfastening it. Biting his lip, he folded his shirt and set it aside. The man worked for a living and despite his boyish looks, underneath the clothes he was mostly lean muscle, more on the wiry side than Karlach, but still very attractive. His tail lashed from side to side as he kicked off his boots and removed his pants. His cock was still soft, bronze and uncut with a few ridges. It was wider than you expected.

Karlach wolf-whistled.

You just watched him appreciatively, his entire body flushing as he looked between the two of you.

“So, I do the hands first?” you asked.

He nodded.

“Lay back on the table then.”

Shivering, Dammon did as you instructed. You placed his hands over his head, and fastened the cuffs on to his wrists.

Then you took the collar and carefully locked it around his neck.

“Can you release yourself?”

Dammon exhaled, and thumbed one of the latches on his wrist. The cuffs opened back up in synchronization. You repeated the test with the verbal trigger, and each release latch.

“I know my work, Tav,” Dammon said, after the last test, sounding impatient. “Have I given you any reason to be concerned about the quality?” There was a distinct irritation to his voice, and it was quite cute.

“I trust your work,” you said, fastening the restraints once more. “I just want to make sure that you know how to get out in a hurry, if you need to.”

His breath caught, and he grinned up at you. “Change your mind about being-”

“Boy, if you decide to push me, you’ll be crawling into the forge tomorrow,” you said gripping his chin, your smile sharp.

Dammon shuddered, and his cock stiffened. “Hells,” he muttered.

You winked at Karlach, who raised her tankard to you. You stroked the base of his horns, and he started to squirm. His facial ridges were less pronounced than other tieflings you knew. It made him look younger.

“You are so pretty. Karlach is a lucky lady.” He lay nude, stretched out on the table, his wrists bound over his head, with you standing over him. “You might consider some piercings. These nipples would be adorable with rings in them.” You ran your thumbnail over the pebbled flesh and he squirmed.

“We’ve been talking about a cock piercing,” Karlach volunteered. “Just need to find someone experienced to do it. Think Halsin knows anyone?”

“Halsin might be the experienced one,” you snickered. “Or Astarion, though…” you shook your head. “I’d bet good money that Gale knows someone too.”

There was a flicker of heat as something traced your wrist. You looked down to see Dammon’s tail brushing against your arm.

“Eager, aren’t you?” you asked. “What were you hoping for today?”

“If I can’t get you to ride me, I at least wanna taste you,” he groaned.

“Tempting, you do have a pretty mouth,” you murmured, dragging your fingers along his lips.

Dammon’s tongue flicked out and curled around your fingertips before he began to suck, moaning as you let him take two fingers down to the knuckle.

“Good boy,” you said, stroking his hair, your fingers now slick. You circled to the other end of the table, running your damp fingers along the underside of his half-hardened cock.

Dammon gasped, his eyes fluttering shut. He arched underneath you, keeping his legs spread to give you easy access.

You lightly squeezed his shaft, and he sighed in pleasure, gazing up at you with color blooming in his cheeks. You rubbed your thumb along the ridges, recalling just how good that texture felt inside you. You stroked him slowly, enjoying the feeling of him lengthening in your hand. Your other fingers lightly drummed against his tight pucker.

Dammon’s hips jerked up, and he flashed you a delighted smile. He bit his lip as you lowered your head to licked the tip of his cock. “Tav-”

“Mmm?” you asked, tongue swirling around the velvety soft flesh. His skin burned hotter than yours. He tasted like salt, sweat, and smoke, with the faintest whiff of iron. Grinning up at him you slowly swallowed him down, taking him to the root.

“Hells-” he gasped.

“Well, aren’t you getting spoiled?” Karlach chuckled. Her boots thudded against the stone as she circled around you to inspect her lover. She stroked his cheek, and he seemed to relax under her touch.

“You didn’t-” his breath hitched. “You didn’t warn me!”

“You’ve met Tav, right?” Karlach laughed. “That’s its own warning.”

You raised your head, giving her a sardonic look. “What did you think was going to happen, Dammon? That Karlach would hold me down and you’d get a chance to fuck your cum deep inside me? Did you think you’d be able to make me beg?” Your tongue flicked along the slit of his cock, tasting the pearly liquid leaking from the tip.

Dammon’s answering moan was low, delicious, and very telling.

Karlach gave you a contemplative look, like she was considering that option. “That does sound fun,” she said.

You just shook your head at her and pulled off your shirt.

Dammon watched you in a daze as you unfastened your pants and stripped down. If you had cuter undergarments, you could have really blown his mind, but you were not in the city, and sadly, fancy lingerie was not a priority.

You climbed astride him, palms flat on his chest, your knees resting on either side of his hips.

“I don’t care what you do to me,” Dammon said with a breathless laugh. “As long as you’re on top of me like this.”

“You’re adorable,” you told him, and leaned over to nip his bottom lip. It was a gentle bite, and he yielded to you immediately, opening his mouth, tasting himself on your tongue. He squirmed underneath you, tail rubbing against your thigh as you gripped his chin. You lowered your head, tongue tracing the tips of his ears.

Dammon keened softly.

“He’s sensitive there,” Karlach said, watching you closely. “Likes it when you pull his hair too.”

You obliged him, holding him at an angle so you could suck on his throat. The pressure was light – Karlach did not want you to leave too many marks on him.

Dammon’s cries grew louder and you felt him bucking underneath you. “So responsive,” you breathed. “I could do this for hours.”

“You’re meaner than you look,” he exhaled.

“Yes,” you nodded, smiling down at him. “I certainly didn’t sweet talk those goblins to death.”

“Could have,” Karlach said breezily.

“Didn’t though.” You ran your thumb along Dammon’s Adam’s apple, watching his eyes widen under your grip.

Dammon groaned. “You’re a lot more dangerous than you look.” A breathy moan as you lightly squeezed. “I-I like that about you.”

“I’ve noticed,” you said, tilting your head back. “You certainly like trying to tease me. Were you hoping I’d corner you like this? Discipline you for pushing me?”

He swallowed loudly. “Maybe.”

“Or were you hoping I’d bring someone else along?” You glanced over at Karlach.

She gave you a toothy grin.

“That too,” he sighed. “Never could get the Commander to notice me and I was too shy to approach the Archdruid.”

You froze for a moment. Most people didn’t want to talk about Zevlor now.

Karlach chuckled. “I told you, Tav. He only looks innocent.”

“You also said his eyes are bigger than his hole, which I’m inclined to agree with,” you said, running your fingers over Dammon’s lips.

His tongue flicked out, a mischievous spark in his eyes. “Spend a lot of time alone in my forge. Gives me time to think.”

You looked over his well-muscled frame. “You’re clearly doing more than just thinking.”

He flushed in pleasure, a raw hunger on his face. “Let me up, Tav. I’ll show you exactly what kind of things I’ve been thinking about.” You laughed. “Karlach, want to help me?” You rose up on your knees and tilted your head back, grinning at her.

She embraced you from behind, the heat of her body making you shiver. Her tail wrapped around your waist, those hot calloused hands sliding down your sides.

Her lips brushed the side of your neck and you growled, watching Dammon narrow his eyes, his teeth clenched. The sweet boy could not stand being left out, and you didn’t blame him.

Your breath caught as Karlach nibbled on your neck. “You wanted the special oil, soldier?” she asked, the engine in her chest purring as she slid two slick fingers between your legs and began stroking you.

“Tymora’s tits,” Dammon breathed as his lover pushed her fingers inside you.

You bit your lip. Karlach’s hands were bigger than yours and the stretch had your eyes fluttering shut.

“Tighter than I expected,” Karlach murmured, licking a stripe along your neck. “You really have been neglecting yourself.” She pushed her fingers deeper, spreading you wider.

You shuddered, meeting Dammon’s darkening gaze.

“She’s good at that, isn’t she?” he purred underneath you. “Makes me squirm for her.”

“You look good squirming,” you told him, your voice husky.

“He does.” Karlach chuckled, pumping her fingers in and out of you slowly. “But I bet you would too.”

“I don’t deny that,” you said, but did not squirm. You kneaded Dammon’s thighs, feeling the muscles tense as his cock bobbed beneath you. You leaned back, pressing light kisses to Karlach’s jaw.

“Mmm, look at you, downright sweet when you want to be,” she said and covered your mouth with hers. She tasted like smoke and wine, her tongue slipping past your lips. She was eager and insistent, and kissing her left you with her fire under your skin, her embers on your tongue, the breath of a dragon in your lungs. You were aglow with her scorching radiance, in danger of burning up under her touch, and it was glorious.

Sweat trickled down your brow and you reluctantly broke away, feeling almost weak from the heat.

“Fuck,” you muttered.

Karlach pulled her fingers out of you, giving you one last smug peck on the cheek. “Go get him, soldier.”

Dammon laughed. “She makes you smolder,” he said, watching Karlach with adoration that bordered on reverence. “Not so cocky now, are you?”

You leaned over him, kissing him hard with the memory of Karlach’s flames on your lips. He moaned into your mouth, hips jerking up, his cock rubbing against your thighs.

“I like your mouth, Dammon. I like how much trouble it’s going to get you in,” you told him, breaking the kiss.

Dammon grinned up at you. “Between Avernus and the forge, I’m used to the heat, Tav. Everything gives at some point, and with the right combination of heat, pressure, and force I can bend anything, even you.”

You laughed in delight and sunk down onto his cock in one stroke.

Dammon arched, a sharp cry escaping his throat.

“That’s a good line,” you said, one hand gripping his neck. “But your timing is off.”

Dammon blinked rapidly, hiccuping as he stared up at you, his lips parted, a strangled sound coming out.

“That’s the kind of thing you say when you have me tied up and bent over.” You patted his cheek gently. “Which you clearly do not.”

He gave a choked laugh. “Tymora’s tits Tav, you’re fucking mean.”

“No, I’m fucking you,” you said. “You might have your cock inside me, but there’s no mistaking that I’m the one who’s fucking you. It’s not who’s on top or whose anatomy is where. It’s who can take control, who can make the other person burn. I would think that being with Karlach has taught you that much.”

Dammon shuddered beneath you, his cock twitching inside you, the ridges dragging against your walls. You slanted your hips just so and squeezed your inner muscles, just to watch his eyes roll back in his head.

“Fuck,” Karlach breathed, her hands running down your back. She could easily overpower you. She could pin you down and seize control. But that wasn’t exactly who Karlach was. She was not submissive and she certainly was not weak. If you asked her to dominate you, oh she would, and she would be spectacular. But outside of battle, she lacked that predatory instinct, that not-quite cutthroat mentality that characterized you.

You rocked your hips, humming softly as you took Dammon to the hilt.

He gasped.

Karlach circled back around to him, stroking his brow. “How’s it feel?”

He gave a low moan. “Like I’m the one getting fucked. “

You chuckled and kept the same steady rhythm, taking your pleasure from him. You thumbed your nipples before reaching over to pinch his.

“You can go faster,” Dammon groaned, lips parted as he panted beneath you, his tail winding around your calf.

“I know,” you said, not changing your tempo.

Dammon raised his hips, tail tightening around your leg as he tried to bounce you on his thighs, but you just rose higher, lifting yourself off his cock. Palms flat on his chest, you shook your head, smirking at him.

“Down boy.”

He gave a snarl of frustration, a savage light flashing in those pretty blue eyes. Fist clenched over his head, he glared at you. Oh, Dammon had spine, you’d seen hints of that fire when he worked with infernal metals, his eyes alight with an unholy passion. “I’m going to enjoy seeing you on the other side of these chains, Tav. And you can rest assured that I’ll get my due.”

You kissed him again, grinning as he nipped your lip. “You’re fucking adorable.”

Karlach laughed. “Hells, Tav, this is the maddest I’ve seen him and I’ve broken one of his hammers.”

“Innocent mistake, love,” he said, giving her a fond look. But he narrowed his eyes at you. “You’re doing this intentionally.”

“I am.” You held eye contact, watching him take labored breaths, sweat beading around his horns. You could taunt him more, edge him till he cried or broke out of the chains. You could goad him into misbehaving and then properly punish him for his transgressions. But instead you would take a page from Sune, and give a little. You would balance the echo of his need and let your own lust resonate with his desires. It would not do to break Karlach’s lover on the first go.

You sunk back down onto his shaft, and he flinched, a low moan escaping his throat. You rolled your hips, your weight on your knees as you began to speed up, taking Dammon is short deep thrusts, his girth stretching you deliciously, the texture of his ridges pulsing against your walls.

Gritting his teeth, Dammon rocked his hips, moving with you. This time he did not try to change your rhythm or seize control.

“Good boy,” you purred, leaning forward to kiss his throat.

He tilted his head back, moaning as you nuzzled his neck, your fingers tangled in his hair.

“You look so good,” Karlach murmured to him. “Are you enjoying yourself?”

“Yes, love,” he groaned through clenched teeth, his gaze on her warm and hazy. “But I’d enjoy Tav more if I were out of these chains.” The sharpness returned when he looked at you.

“That sounds like a “you” problem,” you said cheerfully and bit down.

He yelped, hips jerking upward as he thrust deep into you.

“Keep copping an attitude with me, Dammon. I’ll edge you all day and it will be Karlach who decides when you come, long after I leave,” you said, nipping the tip of his ear.

His eyes fluttered shut and he took several deep breaths, his body shaking. “ ‘m sorry, Tav. I’ll be good,” he mumbled, and then opened his eyes, giving you the most piteous expression.

You smoothed his hair out of his face. “Prove it.”

He tilted his head back, offering you his throat, hips still moving with yours. “What would you have of me?”

“You’re going to hold off on coming till you have permission. Let’s see how long your endurance lasts while I fuck you.” You slipped your hands between your thighs, stroking yourself while you rode him.

Dammon’s eyes darted between your hands and your face. Need, restraint, resentment, and finally acceptance flashed across his features in rapid succession. “All right, I really want to watch you fall apart on me,” he exhaled. “I can endure a lot, Tav.”

“Good.” You began to move faster, hips shaking as you dropped back down onto him, his breath catching as he released a filthy moan. Your hand moved faster as you chased your own release. You were going to make a mess of his lap and see how long he would last beneath you.

Dammon’s tail moved along your thigh, rubbing against you as he stared up at you, biting his bottom lip with a desperate look of concentration on his face.

“Remember, you can’t come yet,” you purred, as he twitched and squirmed beneath you. “But hold out as long as you can, and I’ll reward you.”

Dammon gritted his teeth, nodding his assent as you clenched around him. The chains and collar sparkled prettily and he writhed as you bounced on his cock, fucking yourself deeper and harder than he had the leverage to. The strokes grew faster, the crown of his thick shaft hitting that delicious spot for you, the ridges rubbing you in a way that made your head spin.

Panting, you tensed, your own fingers moving faster as you urged yourself toward the edge.

The fierce hunger on Dammon’s face grew: watching you satiate yourself only intensified his need.

“That’s it,” he groaned. “Want to see you come undone. Want to feel you shaking around me. Been thinking about this for a long time, but the reality is so much more intense-”

The thought of shy polite Dammon stroking himself in his bunk while thinking of you made your core clench in pleasure. You grinned down at him. “Harder,” you growled.

Dammon obediently raised his hips, his thighs slapping against your ass as you rode him.

Then two strong arms wrapped around you, Karlach’s hands stroking your chest as she nibbled on your ear. “Come on, soldier,” she rumbled. “If you’re going to torment him, let’s at least give him a show.”

She nuzzled your neck and you moaned as she sunk her teeth into your shoulder. One of her hands covered yours, putting more pressure on you. Karlach was so warm, her touch firm, and you arched, wailing as she carried you over the edge.

Dammon snarled, his blue eyes locked on yours as you came on his cock, while Karlach helped him finish you off.

Breathing hard, you rested your head against her chest. She kept stroking you through your orgasm, the overstimulation finally making you squirm.

Dammon squeezed his eyes shut and stopped moving, teeth gritted.

Karlach tipped your head back and kissed you lightly. “I’m feeling left out, soldier.”

“Come up here then.” You licked your lips. “Dammon’s mouth is free. “

“But what if I want your wicked tongue?” she cooed.

You chuckled. “Then I’ll eat your pussy till you’re satisfied.” You lifted yourself off Dammon and spun around to face her, before sinking back down onto him.

Karlach was nude, giving you a good view of her tattoos, scars, and wonderfully thick muscles. Grinning, you flicked your tongue across her nipples, her skin almost searing hot.

She gripped your hair. “Going to make a mess all over your face then.”

You groaned as she pushed your head between her thighs, her vulva slick and almost steamy as you ran your tongue over her lower lips. You pushed into her heated folds, her juices already smearing across your cheeks. She tasted good, tangy, with a hint of that blasting powder bite. You raked her thighs with your nails, chuckling as she pulled your hair.

“Tyche’s crooked soul,” Dammon gasped.

“You can’t give Tav a chance to talk, not if you want to keep the upper hand,” Karlach purred. “I just want your mouth, you hear?”

Pressing your tongue inside her, you ran your hands up her thighs, and then gripped her ass. You buried your face in her cunt, the blade of your tongue applying increasing pressure to her clit.

“Knew that clever mouth would be good at this,” she groaned. “Should have done this ages ago-”

Your teeth grazed her sensitive flesh and she shivered. You laughed softly.

“Hells,” she growled. “You’re a fucking menace.”

You just rolled your hips, feeling Dammon tense inside you as you bounced between him and Karlach. Eyes closed, you moaned, slurping at her hole, the sounds wet and obscene. She ground her pelvis against your face. You squeezed her ass, kneading those firm muscles under your fingers. She tensed, her legs twitching, her breathing ragged.

“Getting close, just a little more,” she groaned.

“Solvo,” Dammon snarled, and there was the tinkling of metal. Suddenly a pair of burly arms wrapped around you as he thrust harder into you. His calloused fingers slid between your thighs, already zeroing in on your sensitive flesh.

You moaned against Karlach’s slit, not immune to their teamwork.

“Told you you’d look good between us,” Dammon panted, his words more desperate than smug. He canted his hips, driving himself deeper inside you. “Love-” He gasped, but just from the tone, you knew he was addressing Karlach.

You squeezed the base of her tail then, massaging that tender spot that had her arching into you.

“Fuck,” Karlach’s voice cracked, the beginnings of a sob welling up in her throat.

Dammon’s arms were around your body, Karlach’s thighs bracketed your head. You held her close, sucking on her clit, the three of you entwined together almost too tightly.

“Let me see you, love-” Dammon’s sweet voice begged.

Karlach shuddered, her body stiffening before she gave a raw howl. Her fingers dug into your shoulders. More of that slick tangy cum flooded your mouth and you lapped at her greedily.

Dammon swore. He bucked his hips, drilling you deeper. “Let me taste-” he growled.

Karlach released you, breathing hard.

“He’s so greedy for you,” you laughed. “Not that I blame him.”

“Shut up, Tav,” Dammon muttered, breath hitching as he turned your chin, kissing you hard. Your whole face was damp with her slick and as soon as he tasted her, the allegedly shy smith began to pound you with all that force he promised earlier.

You swore, a strangled cry escaping your throat as he knocked the air out of you with his thrusts.

“Fuck that’s hot-” Karlach panted.

You writhed on the end of Dammon’s cock, eyes fluttering shut as his thighs slapped against your ass at a hard pace. He held on tight, his chest pressed to your back, his fingers digging into your hips. He gasped for breath, making the most delicious ragged growls as he persisted.

Body shaking, face stained with Karlach’s juices, absolutely debauched, you arched in Dammon’s arms.

“That’s it, Tav, let him hammer out some of that tension,” she cooed, voice vibrant with excitement. “I want to watch you come again, I want to see two of my favorite people falling apart, I want to see Dammon’s cum leaking out of you-”

She kissed you then, tasting herself on your tongue, her chest burning against yours. Pinned between the fire and forgemaster, you succumbed. Light-headed, you released a broken moan into Karlach’s mouth, that thread of tension inside you stretched painfully thin, before it snapped, and with it, all the strings holding you upright. You collapsed between them, your thighs slick with your own cum, your body soaking up their power, quenching their heat.

Dammon followed after you, hot seed filling you as he hilted inside you. With a low moan, he bit down on your shoulder, the sharp pain dragging a whine from your raw throat.

Drained, you slumped against his chest, unable to feel your legs.

Breathing hard, Dammon rested his chin on your intact shoulder.

“Oh, we should bandage that,” Karlach laughed as you lifted your head.

You sighed as you looked at the wound, the skin broken. Dammon knew better than to mark you, but apparently when buried inside you, he lost any semblance of control.

“Oh hells, sorry-” Dammon muttered as you sat there in his lap.

“You’re gonna be,” you muttered as Karlach started cleaning the wound and wrapping it for you.

##

“Sorry,” Dammon murmured again as you sipped the wine and ate one of Bex’s biscuits.

“It’s fine,” you yawned, petting his hair as he sprawled between you and Karlach.

“You say that, but Astarion’s going to pitch a fit if he sees that,” Karlach giggled. “He nearly tore out my throat for inviting you. Are you sure the two of you aren’t-”

“I don’t know what’s going on with him,” you sighed. “Anyway, Halsin can patch me up.”

“Oh hells, Master Halsin’s going to see.” Dammon hung his head, hiding his face in Karlach’s shoulder.

“Oh what are you complaining about?” Karlach laughed, kissing his cheek. “You wanted to invite Halsin too-”

Dammon bit his lip.

“So you do fancy Halsin?” Your brows went up. Sweet little Dammon certainly had an eye for quality.

“Who doesn’t?” Karlach laughed. “And he had huge crush on Zevlor.”

“Karlach-” Dammon hid his face.

You smiled wistfully. “Me too,” you said.

“I feel like a consolation prize,” Karlach laughed, her tone teasing.

“No! Not at all!” Dammon hurriedly grasped her hands, panic on his face. “Karlach, they’re attractive, but it’s just admiration. I don’t want to be with them. They’re not you!”

Karlach laughed, kissing his temple.

Dammon stared up at her earnestly. “Karlach-”

“I’m joking, Dammon. I see the appeal of both. And so does Tav, obviously.” She winked at him.

Dammon turned his head, like he forgot that you were there. Maybe he did. It was nice to see them together, to see someone finding happiness in these dark times. Karlach and Dammon certainly deserved it.

You thought of Halsin and your chest clenched. It was past time to address whatever was forming between you. You would talk to him after this.

“So, what did you like about Zevlor?” Karlach asked, nuzzling his cheek. “Tav is clearly dying to know.”

Dammon rubbed the back of his neck. “He was different when I met him. You didn’t see him back in Elturel, Tav. Yes, he was still...craggy and reserved, but he wasn’t so tired, there was more fire in him,” Dammon murmured. He sighed heavily.

You leaned against his shoulder. “Tell me about him.”

“Yeah, you can’t just tease us,” Karlach laughed, though you knew she wasn’t particularly interested in hearing about Zevlor. But she would, for Dammon and for you.

“Well,” Dammon cleared his throat, flashing a bright smile at you. “I was a tinsmith before the Descent. And the first time I met him, he needed a new canteen…”

##

“I should leave my own mark,” Halsin said, his voice gravelly, the cool energy of a healing touch flowing into your shoulder.

The two of you sat facing each other in his tent, your shoulder bared to him.

“Do you need to?” you asked.

He looked you over, his smile tight. “I can smell them both on you,” he said in a low voice. “And that makes me want to-” he gnawed on his lower lip.

“Go ahead.” You studied his face. “You know, you’re invited if it happens again.”

Halsin chuckled. “I would accept, eagerly. But first-” He leaned over, mouth hot against your neck, opposite Dammon’s bite.

You shivered as he laved at the spot, sucking gently for a moment, before he bit down hard, bruising you, but not breaking skin. You fisted his shirt, whimpering as he licked the spot, his teeth grazing your shoulder, his head dipping lower.

“Halsin-”

He growled, reluctantly pulling away, averting his eyes. He shook his head, hunching over for a moment. “I apologize,” he said with a grimace. “I didn’t mean-”

“Let’s have a night out later. If you like, I’ll tell you all about it, and then…I’ll help you with whatever feelings that arouses.”

Halsin shuddered, eyes closed, but he smiled wide at you. “Yes, I would like that. If you’re ready.” Halsin opened his eyes, his expression content.

You thought of Dammon and Karlach sitting side by side, wrapped in their blanket, tails intertwined. You thought you might like that too now. You thought that after all this, you might find comfort in finding something similar with Halsin.

“Yeah, I think I am.”

This was a little idea I played with, but ultimately did not end up using. I've been sitting on it for awhile and am still not entirely happy with it, but it'll do. I have such trouble writing explicitly gender neutral smut, but I tried lol.

[fay-run]

It was late, much too late for Sindyrdra to still be avoiding her trance. She wasn’t on watch, nor did she have any good reason for not allowing herself to meditate. Instead, she lay with her eyes open, watching as the githyanki beside her slept peacefully. Lae’zel, her Lae’zel. Sindyrdra smiled, reaching a hand up to brush a rogue braid off of her lover's face. Almost as soon as it came, the smile fell and her stomach tightened. She was no stranger to fear. Powerful a sorcerer as she may be, she feared for her life on more than one occasion in recent months. But the fear of losing someone, of having to live without someone she loved? It hadn’t been long since that kind of fear had last held her in its clutches. It was horrifying. 

Her memory flashed back to the morning prior, the sunbeams rising around the surrounding buildings as they sat on the balcony. Lae’zel next to her, holding her with a gentleness Sindyrdra never in a million years would have guessed she could possess. Her fingers drew comforting motions along her back as they spoke of their travels, the future. Their future. Lae’zel’s voice became small and quiet, timid, and her words came out almost pleading.

When all this is over, will you stay with me? For good?

Hearing the subtle, silent hope in Lae’zel’s words had jarred her. It had already been well established they had become more than what they had originally agreed to, just a way to let off steam in the midst of the mess they’d been thrust into. They’d grown to trust each other enough to tell one another the details of their pasts, the thing each member of their group kept under heavily guarded lock and key. They’d bonded over the similarities of the life they’d grown up in; Lae’zel in Creche K’liir and Sindyrdra in Menzoberranzan. They’d forgiven one another for their past transgressions, for the things they were forced to do in the unforgiving societies they’d inhabited. Even after all this, the idea of looking to the future, whatever future they might have after dealing with The Absolute, wanted to send her into survival mode. There was a possibility they wouldn’t even have a future. That they be killed, or turned into mindflayers. How could she even consider what comes next? 

Then Sindyrdra looked into Lae’zel’s wide, expectant eyes, and she just melted. Vulnerability didn’t come naturally to Lae’zel, she knew how hard this was for her. Sindyrdra allowed herself a moment to think about what if. What if they defied all odds? What if they could destroy The Absolute? What if their parasites would be gone? 

And she’d realized quickly enough that she could not imagine anything else but being by Lae’zel’s side, wherever it took them. She didn’t care if it meant having Vlaakith loyalists coming for them for the rest of eternity. She didn’t care if it meant fighting alongside her in the astral plane, if she’d even be allowed to do so. 

As her response, Sindyrdra kissed her. Sweetly, deliberately, the type of kiss meant for long-term lovers. Tenderness was something so foreign to the both of them, but they were learning. Together.

“I admit this ‘trance’ of yours is foreign to me, though I believe your eyes are meant to be closed.”

Lae’zel’s voice was groggy, and when Sindyrdra turned to look at her she was attempting to blink away the sleep from her eyes. This stubborn woman wouldn’t just go back to sleep when woken, of course. She probably knew Sindyrdra was still awake while in the clutches of sleep and willed herself awake just to fuss at her. 

“I still have plenty of time,” she responded, waving away Lae’zel’s encroaching concern. “Go back to sleep. You need it.”

“And you do not?”

“I don’t sleep,” she said, grinning while she eyed Lae’zel. “Remember?”

Lae’zel made her little ‘chk’, a mannerism Sindyrdra found utterly adorable. 

“Yes, I remember. I find it unfair that your kind should have this advantage,” she sat up, holding herself up by the palms of her hands, and blew her messied hair out of her face. “And I find it odd that you opt to stare mindlessly at the ceiling rather than do something proactive with your extra freetime.”

There was a time when Sindyrdra may have been offended by Lae’zel’s bluntness, but she now knew that her words didn’t come from malice. She had been forced to spend every waking moment training, or studying, or doing something that her kin would deem as ‘worthwhile’. It was all she knew, to be militant during all hours. In her mind, she did not understand why Sindyrdra would take the extra time her lack of a need to sleep granted her to simply sit and reflect, rather than do anything productive.

“Sometimes it's nice to have time to yourself,” she replied, turning her gaze back up to the ceiling. “To think. I guess I might have thought like you, once. Before I left home.”

She’d been such a different person back then. Anything to please her mother, anything to please her House, anything to please Lloth. And all of it had come back to bite her. If any good came of it, it was that she had the wisdom to guide Lae’zel through the very same plight. 

Lae’zel was wide awake now, clearly not allowing for Sindyrdra to stay up without her. Sindyrdra shook her thoughts out of her head and turned her body so she was facing Lae’zel, taking one of her hands in her own. The gith looked down at their interlaced fingers between them and frowned. A gentle touch was more startling to Lae’zel than a slap to the face. Yet she did not yank her hand away as she once might have. Instead, she allowed Sindyrdra to pull them both to their feet, and began guiding them out of their room in the Elfsong Tavern. 

“Where are we going?” asked Lae’zel, eyeing Sindyrdra suspiciously but giving no resistance to her lead. “This bears a frightening similarity to the night you forced me to wade through the river with you. I will not be pleased if I see us approach any body of water.”

“I did not force you,” Sindyrdra insisted, turning around for only a moment to shoot Lae’zel a look. “You know, most water in the Underdark is too cold to swim in. I wasn’t used to it either and I still had fun.”

“You pushed me in before I was ready.”

Sindyrdra was certain if she turned around again, she would be met with the most adorable Lae’zel pout she’d ever seen, but she resisted. “And if I hadn’t you never would have gone in. Now, hush. It is my turn to show you something.”

Lae’zel acquiesced and fell silent. While she couldn’t see her, Sindyrdra furrowed her brow and worried at her lip. The decision to show this to her was a last-minute one, thought of only when she woke just now. Now, she worried it would upset her. Or worse, anger her. But there was no turning back now, of course. Lae’zel would never allow it. 

The cool night air nipped at their skin when they opened the hatch to the roof of the tavern. Selune was full and bright, and her light lit up the rooftop gardens enough for them to find their way to the stone bench in the middle. Sindyrdra sat Lae’zel down and took a seat next to her. Lae’zel’s expression had grown increasingly concerned, and shoulders were tense when she turned to her. 

“Why have we come here, Sindyrdra?” she looked around. “If there is something we must speak about, surely–”

“There is nothing we need to talk about, Lae’zel,” she assured her, placing a hand on her arm, then pointing to the sky. “Look up.”

Lae’zel looked up. For a moment her face was blank, searching for whatever it was her lover was trying to show her. Then, her mouth opened slightly, and her eyes widened. “The Tears…” she breathed, reaching to the sky as if she could touch them. “K’liir… They are so bright.”

Sindyrdra swallowed, still nervous the gith would only grow bitter at the sight of her home. “It happens when the moon is full. Gale pointed it out to me, one of the first nights we camped together. I thought you might like to see.”

When Lae’zel didn’t immediately answer, her stomach twisted in regret. This was stupid. She deserved whatever scolding she was going to get for this. 

But Lae’zel’s expression did not turn sour. Instead, it illuminated; shining brighter than The Tears themselves. She took the hand laying on her shoulder and brought it to her lips, then looked up from it with a smile. 

“Your thoughts were correct,” she said, looking at Sindyrdra as if all the stars in the Realms could compete with her beauty. But they could not, because to Lae’zel, Sindyrdra would win against each one. “This is just another wonder of this world you have shown to me. One I will cherish greatly; for I will think of you each time I see it. It is magnificent.”

Sometimes when she looked at her, Sindyrdra couldn’t believe Lae’zel was real, and tonight was no different. The woman beside her was the most incredible woman she’d ever known; more fearsome than any drider, more depth to her than any abyss. She was truly something to behold. Sindyrdra kissed her, and when they detached, she placed her forehead against hers for just a blissful moment, before pulling back again. “Yesterday, when you brought me to the sunrise I… I was quiet. I couldn’t use my words. I fear for the future and I fear losing you, which makes it hard to say, but you deserve to hear it out loud,” She licked her lips timidly. “I will stay with you, Lae’zel. After we defeat the Absolute, and for eternity. No matter what you choose when you are faced with the choice we both know you will have, I will be by your side. Whether physically, or if it must be some other way. I will be here for you to come to, always.”

It is a terrifying thing, to show all of your heart and soul to another, especially when it goes against everything you were ever taught. The two of them seemed to be doing it often as of late, however. And each time, it got a little easier.

Lae’zel’s big, emotive eyes were looking at her with what could only be described as awe. And this time, she was the one left speechless. So Sindyrdra kissed her once again, because they’d said more than enough the past two nights. After the brain was defeated there would be more time for flowery confessions of love, without ever truly saying the word love.

It wasn’t needed. They stayed under the Tears of Selune as they finished their journey over the night sky, as close to one another as the material plane would possibly allow, and each of them knew what the other felt.

[unreadpoppy]

down by the river - Chapter 14

Raphael x Warlock!Tav

Read on AO3

chapter 13

A/N: Did I rush this plot because I'm tired and want to finish this fic already? Yes. Next chapter is the finale.

As Tav had predicted, feelings were running hot in her group. 

Gale was angry at her for wanting to give away the crown to Raphael, and for not thinking of what that could mean to him. Some others were upset that she took the deal, considering how dangerous devils were. Lae’zel was the only one actually happy, as she now had the means of saving the Prince of the Comet. 

The wizard and the gith were shouting over this when Tav said “Enough! What’s done is done. I signed the contract, and I’m not turning back on it.” 

“But why not reconsider-” Gale tried to argue but Tav cut him off. 

“I can’t.”

“You can’t or you won’t?” He said and she huffed.

“Gale.” Wyll said. “She is right. Much like my contract, Tav cannot raise a hand against Raphael.” 

“Of course you can’t.” The wizard murmured and then shook his head. “I just really hope you made the right choice.” He said, as he made his way to his corner of the room.

Tav said nothing as she looked down, wondering the same thing. 

…

The next days passed in a blurry. The team had never been more focused, as they freed Astarion from Cazador and Shadowheart from Shar, saved Ulder Ravengard and even discovered the truth about the Emperor. Although tensions were still running high, they had been willing to put it aside for now. 

As they finally acquired the third netherstone, after killing Gortash, there was only one thing left to do: Destroy the Elder brain. 

“Are you ready?” Wyll asked, as they looked to the portal that would lead them back to the material plane. With the orphich hammer in hand, Lae’zel freed the Prince of the Comet, who sacrificed himself, turning into a mind flayer, to help destroy the brain. 

“No.” Tav briefly looked back at Gale, wondering about his fate, the crown and the orb “But we have to do this anyways.” She said, stepping in the portal. 

…

Swimming to shore, Tav felt a hurricane of emotions in her chest. 

They did it. The nether brain was defeated, and the tadpoles were gone with it. 

The Absolute was no more. 

As Tav looked around her companions, they all shared a feeling of disbelief. What had seemed impossible a few months ago, had happened, all thanks to their combined efforts. 

As everyone gathered in the pier, Tav looked at her companions. Though the road here had been arduous, they had all made it. But, even if their tadpoles were gone, their troubles weren’t. 

Lae’zel was the first to leave. After killing Orpheus and calling upon his dragons, she turned to Tav. “I can never forget you. Your name will be etched in our slates. You will be called Mla’ghir - liberator.”

A stray tear fell down Tav’s cheek as she reached forward and hugged Lae’zel. “This better not be a goodbye.” She whispered in the gith’s year. 

“It won’t.” Lae’zel gave her a tight smile, as she climbed on the red dragon and flew away. 

As they all looked to the skies, Astarion began to burn.  

“Oh no, no, no, no.” He said. Without the tadpole, his sensitivity to sunlight came back, and soon, he was running away to the shadows. Tav tried to follow after him, but something else caught her attention.

Karlach’s time had been up, too, as flames engulfed her. 

“This is it. Goodbye sun. Goodbye sea.” She fell to her knees as Tav rushed to her. “Hey, soldier. How did I do?” 

“You were amazing.” Tav said.

Karlach put a hand on Tav’s shoulder. “So were you. My friend. My companion.” She sniffed. “I adore you.” 

“Karlach…it doesn’t have to end like this. You could still go back to Avernus.” Tav urged her. 

“No. I refuse to be alone in there anymore.” 

“But you won’t have to be.” Wyll chimed in. “I’ll go with you.” 

“Please, Karlach. Go with Wyll, he’ll keep you safe” 

The tiefling looked at Wyll and then back at Tav, before nodding and standing up. “Alright, but we’ll have to leave right now.” 

And so, the two left. Tav only hoped they would be alright as she swiped a tear from her eye, looking back at the Chiontar. Gale slowly approached. 

“The Crown - it’s somewhere in the Chiontar. If I salvage the stones, I can reforge it. ” He said. “The power of Karsus would be in my hands…” He looked at Tav. “But what then? What would I do with it, once I have it?”

Tav sighed and turned to him. “Perhaps it’s best if you leave it where it is. Lest anyone should ever be tempted by such power.”

“And what about Raphael?” He raised a brow. 

“You let me handle him. He is a trouble for another time.” She took a deep breath. “For now, we should enjoy our newfound freedom.”

Gale nodded. “A wise suggestion. If this adventure has taught me anything, it’s that there are things in this world far more valuable than power. I’ve grown quite fond of this merry band of ours, and I’d quite like to see what happens to it.” He walked up to Tav. “I’m sure Mystra will summon me soon enough, but until then, I supposed we celebrate our victory the mortal way - with a drink in our hands, and reckless abandon in our hearts.” 

He turned to the others, and they all agreed. 

“I am seldom one to imbibe, but even I shall make an exception on a day like today.” Halsin said. “I think we have earned it, no?” 

Tav smiled. “A celebration sounds perfect.” 

…

After a long night of drinking and singing, when all had gone to sleep, Tav went back to the Chiontar. Her mission was not yet done. 

Jumping into the river, it didn’t take her long to find the remains of the Crown and the stones. Gathering them, she swam back to shore. She held it in her hand, thinking of all the trouble the blasted thing had caused her. For a moment, she felt compelled to destroy it for once and all, when a new idea came to her. 

Now free of the tadpole, Tav’s old warlock powers came back, and with a snap of her fingers, she opened a portal to the House of Hope. 

“Finally.” She heard Raphael say the moment she stepped in. His eyes looked at the object in her hand. “The Crown of Karsus.” He looked at her. “What a marvelous job you have done, bringing it to me. For a moment, I thought you wouldn’t honor our contract, but I knew I could always count on you, Tav.” 

The devil walked towards her, a hand extended. Tav looked between him and the crown and hesitated. 

“Tav.” He said harshly. 

“I’ll give you the crown” she said “under one condition.” 

“You are in no position to make demands.”

“After all I’ve been through, I think I am.” She replied in the same tone as his, her gaze cold and harsh. 

Raphael huffed, as the two stared at the other. “What do you want?”

Tav took a deep breath. “This is the last thing I’ll ever ask of you. I want to renegotiate our pact.” 

Raphael’s brow raised. “This is a most strange request coming from you.” He straightened his back. “Go on.” 

“I want to age again, and when my time comes, either of old age or other causes, let me die and our contract be dissolved.” Tav said. “In other words, this shall be my last life.” 

The devil looked at her with confusion. Where was the girl who once begged for a new chance? 

“Why?” He simply said. 

She shrugged. “I am tired.” 

“So you want to throw away our partnership because of tiredness?” 

“No.” She shook her head. “That is not what I meant. I want to remember what it is like to live, truly live, again. To know that my time will come and to enjoy what little I have left. I want to die, so that I may live in freedom again.” 

“Are you not free?” 

She sighed “Bound to you, I will never truly be, will I?” 

Raphael did not respond yet they both knew it to be true. He mulled over it for a moment, before sighing “I’ll abide.”

Tav breathed relieved. “Thank you.” She extended her hand. “The crown is yours.” 

In a move that surprised her, he got down on one knee, his head raised high. Tav understood what he wanted, as she placed the crown on his head.

“To the future Archdevil Supreme.” Tav said, as Raphael slowly stood to his full height, smirking. 

This was the beginning of the end.

[barbwillbrb]

Finally finished my full playthrough of BG3. Here be my thoughts:

For context, I had been sitting on my first playthrough for a month, as I had 4 huge fights left that I was putting off and little else left (Orin, Ansur, House of Hope, and the last battle). I did start a second playthrough in the interim, getting that character to the Gauntlet of Shar, then decided to go back to finish my OG character. I finally finished the game a couple days ago and have been collecting my thoughts. Here are some resolutions from my playthrough and thoughts on the game/characters:

1. First, here is my first Tav— Quil, a nonbinary tiefling Bard with very high charisma. I adore the character creator, but have one gripe— why can’t we yeet the titties in the vanilla creator (I know there are mods)? I want no titties please.

2. I did not get the Volo eye during my first run; Quil knew a bad idea when they saw one (my second Tav, Rackal, not so much). Quil also didn’t fuck with the Necromancy of Thay.

3. Scratch and owlbear cub made it all the way to the end!

4. Fucked up Auntie Ethel’s quest and got Mayrina killed.

5. Minthara was killed (I only recently fully learned how non-lethal attacks work).

6. It was really hard for me to pick a romance; I spent a good hour loading/reloading the tiefling party to go through my options (everyone but Gale and Wyll were interested, as I was specifically playing a character who wasn’t openly flirting with anyone; I wanted to see what characters came to me first. That said, I had to keep pushing Lae’zel back because girl wanted me within moments of meeting). Karlach ended up stealing my heart; I adore her.

7. I also had Halsin join us. I don’t see a lot of talk about KarlachxTavxHalsin on here, and it kinda bums me out; I was sold on the polycule when KarlachxHalsin started flirting with each other.

8. As a high-charisma character, Act 2 was my favorite, especially when it came to Yurgir. I did not know you could talk your way out of that fight completely; I think I was as shocked as Astarion when it worked. I’ve never seen a game where you could just… talk people to death. It was amazing.

9. Speaking of Act 2, Ketheric Thorm’s introduction is one of the coolest things I’ve ever seen. It was perfect at conveying the magnanimity of the situation.

10. I got everyone’s happy endings I think. Wyll, Karlach and I went to Avernus and are kicking ass, Gale is a professor/crown destroyed, and Astarion did not ascend/spawn were spared (the Gur letter at the epilogue is AMAZING). Shadowheart turned away from Shar, but her parents died so she could be free; she has the owlbear cub though, so I think she’ll be okay.

11. I don’t understand the whole “Wyll can’t make a decision” discourse. I get the issue with the pact scene (I can’t remember if I had the option to let him choose, but we worked with Mizora), but people make it out like he doesn’t make any decisions about his future at all in the game. I was able to leave the Blade of Avernus/Duke decision to him, and he chose the Blade. He had some cool dialog about the decision as well.

12. The goddamn Orpheus vs. Emperor choice is about the dumbest thing ever. I feel like if you maintained an overall positive relationship with the Emperor and managed to pull Lae’zel away from Vlaakith, I think there should be an opportunity to break Orpheus free and convince him to join you WITHOUT the Emperor turning tail to the Netherbrain. You should be able to free Orpheus and then have another high persuasion check to get him to stand down/join you. I feel that given the severity of the current situation, Orpheus would accept joining forces if it meant no additional mindflayers be made. Just the fact the Emperor goes by, Orpheus gets freed, and someone has to become a mindflayer is just…. Frustrating at best.

13. I think that regardless if romanced or not, a Lae’zel with high/exceptional approval who turned from Vlaakith is in love with Tav. The emotion in her goodbye at the docks is so powerful.

14. Similarly, I think the same can be said for Shadowheart (if turned away from Shar/had high approval).

15. The Dribbles quest sucked, but worth it just to make Lucretious happy/have her say nice things to me.

16. The character that grew on me the most was Astarion. I honestly didn’t like him too much, but his growth over Acts 2 and 3 really changed my mind. Plus, when I met Yenna, he actually gave approval towards any means of helping her— I was SHOOK.

17. I think the Orin kidnapping would be more impactful if your love interest was taken instead (the angst/race against the clock would be amazing). I also think that if one of the tadpole crew gets taken, the fact that Orin doesn’t have one should tell someone something’s up.

18. My favorite companion is tied between Karlach and Lae’zel. Karlach is so optimistic/stands true to herself despite the bullshit she goes through, and Lae’zel character growth is spectacular.

19. My least favorite companion is Shadowheart, although she’s beginning to grow on me. It’s just that some of her offhand comments are so off-putting in a real hypocritical way. For example, the “I didn’t expect to feel empathy towards refugees” thing is really hard to ignore.

20. My favorite NPCs are, in no particular order, Ketheric Thorm, Rolan, Yurgir, Omeluum, Blurg, Lucretious, Barcus Wroot, Auntie Ethel and Mol.

21. My least favorite NPCs are Gortash (I think he is a great villain, but he’s the kind of manipulative, opportunistic evil that makes my skin crawl), Wulburn Bongle and honestly most of the creche. Also that lady who’s mean to the dogs, but I nuked her with fireball and don’t see her as much if an NPC.

22. WHY CAN’T I ADOPT THE FUCKING CATS?