#he thinks it would be faster for us to work in excel?
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metastablephysicist · 5 months ago
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my boss is upset that his students are using an object oriented programming language to write object oriented programs
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quarterlifekitty · 5 months ago
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You don’t work under König. Which is a good thing, because if you did, the facade of stern professionalism he’s built up over all these years would’ve crumbled in an instant. No, you’re a clerical worker for KorTac. You’re not combat trained, but you have an excellent memory and type like lightning.
And you like the colonel’s office.
You remarked upon how it was positioned on day when making small talk. Yours was placed such that in the evenings, the sun would glare directly at your screen— and the blinds had gaps, making them of no help. His was opposite directionally, he faced no such issue. Mindlessly, he gave permission— no, invited you to make use of his office whenever it suited you. He couldn’t really say why. He just looked at you and felt his senses leave him.
Which is how you’d taken up residence on his office couch, tapping away on a laptop with a couple of clipboards and folders stacked next to you. And you were chatty. It didn’t bother him at all— he’d always been an excellent multitasker, and if anything, your constant conversation made paperwork go by much faster. You took frequent breaks, and seemed to go off on many tangents, and yet it seemed you always finished your work quite early.
While he was by no means a hermit, König isn’t exactly hip, and he knows it. You’re constantly teaching him new things and telling him about trends you like and dislike. The newest thing he’s learned from you is the modern use of “hear me out”— which is usually followed by you pulling up a picture of some left-of-conventionally-attractive celebrity on your phone to show him.
And he loves it when you ask him to hear you out. Because when he sees the kind of freaks you’re into? He thinks he might just have a chance.
(What he hasn’t realized is that if the glare at your desk was so bad, why didn’t you just move your desk?)
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irndad · 10 months ago
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don't date coworkers- s.r.
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a/n: i literally wrote this very fast and also i hope you like it pls go easy on me!!! reader has a policy they don't date coworkers. spencer is so angsty abt that !! also sorry for dropping a new fic at 2am LOL wc: 1.7k
She’s really, really good at talking to people. 
It’s one of the many traits Spencer adores about her. She moves through crowds with ease, and she can charm her way into any piece of information from whatever city cop they need a favor from. She integrated into the team faster than anyone could’ve expected. This is a strength not all profilers have- they know what it takes to know what makes someone appealing, but rare is the ability to be as charismatic and charming as she is. 
She’s good at talking to him.
She’s worked at the BAU for about a year now. 13 months, 7 days and 8 hours since she walked through the doors of the bullpen for the first time, beaming at him for the very first time. Give or take. 
Spencer wouldn’t be surprised if everyone knew that he was in love with her. He’s halfway certain she does, and is being too polite to mention it. Normally, Spencer is incredibly regimented about boundaries. While the BAU is his family, and there���s no real way to deny that, he knows that he’s less than ideal to go out with. He’s stocky and he never cuts his hair (even though she swears it’s cute longer) and he’s an awkward guy- gangly and tall and just ill-fitting to be part of the scenery of her life. 
It’s a Friday, and a rainy one at that. It’s one of the blessed ones where they don’t really have a case, just paperwork to catch up on, reports and her desk faces a window. 
Normally, when Spencer gets his work done (a good four hours before everyone else on a paperwork-only day), he’d head out. Catch up on whatever Russian novel he’s been chipping away at- but she’s here, and he’s made her favorite tea. 
“I thought you could use a treat,” he says, walking over to her desk. She looks up at him, brushing overgrown bangs, “It’s not really a great one, but I’ll get you some scones on the way to mine, yeah?”
She looks up at him, dropping her pen and focusing entire energy on him. He feels a bit overwhelmed, like an ant under a magnifying glass. 
“Did you know that I adore you, Spence?” 
He is very much not aware. No amount of her saying it will ever make him know. She takes a long sip from the mug. He knows how much honey she likes in it. He studies how she looks, eyes closed serenely, completely invested in what he’s given her. 
“You’ll be taking her home, pretty boy?” Morgan snickers, in a not altogether unkind manner. 
“Fuck off,” she says kindly, not taking her eyes off of Spencer as she rebuffed Morgan’s teasing. 
“Easy, easy,” Morgan laughs, “I’ll leave your boyfriend alone.”
If she has anything to say to that, it doesn’t come out then. 
He’s still bright red, though. Morgan is amused, and Spencer knows that she really, truly adores Morgan. Spencer loves him too, but it would be nice if he laid off the jokes. 
She doesn’t date coworkers. 
He knows this because of the first time they’d met, when he’d been walking in carrying a croissant for Garcia and a coffee for JJ, and saw what can only be described as a truly ridiculously beautiful woman in the bullpen. 
She’d been leaned back, smiling openly as Morgan tossed some random pick-up line towards her. He remembers it now like he can still hear it, her lilting lovely voice carrying just the right amount of warmth to make this not sting, or at least sting as little as possible. 
“I’m sorry, Derek,” she had said, “I make it a point not to date coworkers.” 
Which of course is fine. She can date whoever she wants, and it’s a good policy to have personally. And Spencer’s never really be the kind of guy who excelled at getting dates. He knew from the first minute that he saw her that even if she didn’t think that way… well, it wouldn’t be him, who she picked. 
Now, they are very close. So close that she drives him home from work every Friday. Which usually includes staying at his shitty apartment and watching VHS tapes of documentaries and Doctor Who. 
He wants to kiss her every Friday. All, the time, really. It’s kind of plaguing him. Clearly, she likes hanging out with him. Something about him is appealing. It’s foolish to assume that it’s more than friends, especially for someone like him to be with someone like her. 
She doesn’t date coworkers. 
“I made sure the film tonight has subtitles!”
“Are you saying film because this film is foreign, Spence?”
“I promise it’s worth it!” He says excitedly, “And they’re really done well. You won’t have to have me whisper the translations to you in real time!”
“I didn’t mind that,” She laughs then, a real laugh, “but I’m glad we’re getting to hang out tonight.”
It’s funny- they’ve done this so, so many times, but he never stops being thrilled. 
___________________________________
Sometimes, when the summer air is forgiving enough, they walk home from the office. She takes the train in, and they walk back to his place. Tonight is one of these nights, and god- she looks lovely. She’s tied her blazer around her waist, and the sunset hits her face in that gorgeous baroque painting kind of way. 
“You’re very pretty,” he hears himself say before he can stop it. He’s endlessly pleased when she preens at the praise. 
“You’re not so bad yourself, Doctor,” she says, shoving her hands into her pockets, a nervous gesture. He wants to hold those hand, intertwine her lovely delicate fingers with his bony wispy fingers. 
“You’re being nice to me,” he says, looking down at his shoes. They’re stupid. He should wear loafers, or some other shoe that doesn’t make him like half-child half-geek. 
“I’m being accurate, actually,” she says she bumps his shoulder. 
She’d be a wonderful girlfriend. He lives in the world this can happen quite often, in his fantasy. She laughs at his jokes and tells him he’s kind, and good, and she means it. He’s lucky to have this much of her- more than anyone else on the team! Spencer knows he’s her favorite. The way she’s looking at him now, how she give-up her Fridays to spend with him, on his ratty couch, how she always listens. Whenever they're both on the jet and he falls asleep, he always wakes up with a blanket on him. She's so good at loving people.
Being her favorite on the team does not mean he’s in the running to be a boyfriend. But he’d fucking want to be. He’d be a good boyfriend. Spencer, he’s gone so far for her. He fantasizes about getting her flowers that have symbolic meaning.
“Are you okay, boy-genius?”
“I’m better than okay. Do you want popcorn?”
She wants popcorn. He sets the movie up, and she gets comfortable on his couch, curling up with his purple felt blanket, and his mind betrays him with unhelpful images of what it might look like if she was his, if this is what he came home to. 
Don't picture welcome home kisses, or movie nights or being wanted. Don't.
It’s very, very hard to focus on the movie.  
She’s touchy, with him. He’s not sure if it’s because she could never see him as her boyfriend, but he’s grateful as she leans her head on his. She smells like peonies. When the credits roll, they stay like that for minute- her head on his shoulder and one of her legs thrown over his. 
He wonders, not for the first time, if she feels the same way about him. If things were just..different, then they’d be kissing under the haze of his TV right now, if he’d know what that chapstick she carries with her every day tastes like. 
“Do you ever wonder what it’d be like if we met under different circumstances?” he says, once time passes and he speaks instead of thinking.
“Hmm?” She hummed, relaxed eyes flitting their gaze over to him.
“Like, at a bar or something.”
“But you hate bars.”
“That’s why I said or something!”
Her lip juts out adorably, “But then I wouldn’t get to see you in your element.”
“Yeah,” he sighs, resting his neck on the top of the cushion. The AC is a little too much in the room. He wonders if she’s cold. “But who knows. Maybe we’d date, or something.”
It’s the dumbest thing he’s ever fucking said. Both because it was a dumb way to say it, but because it was an advance. He feels white hot shame lick at his spine when he looks at her, and hears her laugh. 
“I don’t think so, Spence.” 
“No,” shitshitshit, “I didn’t mean-“
“I mean, if you don’t want to date me now, I don’t think meeting at like, Whole Foods would’ve been the difference maker.”
It’s then he hears it- the piece he couldn’t place in her voice, when she gets like this. It’s being resigned. 
“What are you talking about?”
“C’mon, Spence,” she says, another bitter chuckle coming through, “You know how I feel. I haven’t exactly beens subtle.”
“But you don’t date coworkers. You have a rule.”
She looks at him with no recognition of what he’s saying. 
“No, because you told Morgan that, it’s the first thing I ever heard you say.”
“Yeah, but-“
“And yes, okay, you’ve been my favorite person almost as long as I’ve known you and yes, I would fucking love for you to be my girlfriend, but that was your rule!”
“You want me to be your girlfriend?”
“Obviously!”
He doesn’t get the chance to say anything else before, well- before she’s kissing him. More aggressive than that, really. Crawled onto his lap, arms around his neck, and where she leads Spencer is all too happy to follow. His body is not great at moving on instinct, but his whole nervous system feels alive- the weight of her in his lap, the feel of her waist under his fingers, the way he’s allowed this. It feels like such a pleasure, hedonistic in a way he’s never, ever been allowed to experience.
“You had a rule,” he says dumbly when she pulls away. His lips are wet. He’d like to go back to kissing, thank you very much. 
“You’re the exception, to every rule, Spencer.”
When he kisses her again (which he’s allowed to do now, holy fuck) Spencer decides he’s going to spend the rest of all time earning that status. 
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mastermindmiko · 4 months ago
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Apology
Pairing: Draco Malfoy + reader Word count: a bit less than 1k Summary: You and Draco have a fight. Hurt/comfort with a happy ending Warnings: none, I believe, except slight bad boyfriend behavior on Draco's part.
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It’s not often when a fight reaches this point. It’s always just the slight bickering and maybe a hurtful comment that gets resolved immediately as it’s said. It wasn’t frequent when I would have to leave his prefect’s dorm and take to my own dorm room instead, this was one of those times. 
The hufflepuff dorm is wonderful, warm and cozy. The plants provide it with a certain feel to it that makes you feel like you’re at home. The kitchens are just a few steps away, making late night snacks very easy to access. I’d decided that I’d hop over there before going to my dorm for a nice cup of hot chocolate, maybe that would stop the crying. 
I use my sleeves to wipe away the tears from my face, and grimace when I notice a bit of snot on my sleeves, contrasting against the black fabric. I huff and I untie my black and yellow tie from around my neck, scrunching it up and shoving it into the pockets of my robe. 
I wasn’t sure how it started, it was all going as planned, we were getting ready to go to sleep. I was already halfway into my pyjamas, and my skincare routine, already done. The tears along with the moisturizer make my face feel very sticky and slimy, but I couldn’t get myself to care. He was already in bed, and we were discussing our days. 
He told me about his potion that he perfected. He told me about the game of exploding snaps that he won against Blaise, and the book that he started reading a week ago, that he finished. I told him about my saplings that were growing well, the excellent grade that I got in care of magical creatures and how glad I was about that grade since I’d been working so much on it. I recalled to him the long nights that Anthony Goldstein from Ravenclaw spent on it. 
That seemed to switch something on in his brain, or switch off his common sense, more like it. He began to ask questions more and more about Anthony. His house, his friends, how I knew him, how long I knew him, and more along those lines. He’d asked if I had spent time with him since submitting the project and I replied, “Not really, but I wouldn’t mind it, he’s a nice person.” 
When I got a few mumbles in reply, I teased, “Don’t be jealous Draco, you know you’re the only one for me.” 
“I’m not jealous! As if I’d be worried that anyone would want you.” He blurted out. I knew he didn’t mean it, but that didn’t mean it hurt any less. Draco tends to say things he doesn’t mean when he’s mad, but after asking him a few more words from him and me, I couldn’t stay in the room with him any longer. 
The memories brought back an ache to my heart and I let out a sob. I feel grateful when I see the common room in sight. There’s a person, leaning against the hufflepuff dorm, their back turned against me. However, it was pretty blatant who it was by the shiny blond hair. I sniffle, hoping I don’t look how I feel, “What are you doing here?” 
He pants, “I'm a much faster runner than you’d think.” He takes a few more breaths, chest heaving and he continues, tilting his head with a small smile, “Plus, I took a different route.” 
I nod my head and his small smile falls. He takes a few steps towards me, arms reaching out, but I fold mine in front of my chest. He sighs, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” 
That’s all it takes for my eyes to start burning up again, and I hate that because I should be angry, I shouldn't be crying! I turn to look away, hoping he doesn’t notice, but he always does. He clicks his tongue, and takes a few steps towards me anyways. He wraps his arms around me, pulling me close to his chest. Even if he’s the reason why I’m angry, his embrace comforts me. 
“I didn’t mean it, I promise. We all know that if anyone’s settling in this relationship, it's you. I don’t know how you put up with me, but I’m sure as hell glad that you do.” He admits and I upfold my arms to wrap them around him. I feel him relax under my accepting movements and he presses a kiss to the top of my head before resting his chin on top of mine. I confess, “That really hurt me, Draco.” 
“I know, and I hate myself for hurting you. I’m so sorry.” he says, I can still feel his sharp intakes of breath against me. I pull away from his arms to look into his eyes, and he leans down to press a kiss against my lips. He implores, “I’m sorry, and I don’t expect you to forgive me, but let me make it up to you.” 
I smile a bit, sniffling. He presses a small kiss to my cheek which I’m sure couldn’t have been very pleasant due to the mixture of moisturizer and tears. He reaches out to take my hand, and he suggests, “How about a cup of hot chocolate before we head back?”
My small smile stretches at how well he knows me, and I lean my head against his arm. He pulls me closer to him by my waist and he whispers, “Ohh, you know I can’t have you mad at me, love you too much for that.”  
Hey! if you think this didn't completely suck, feel free to check out my masterlist
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amongemeraldclouds · 8 months ago
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"if you're going to stare at me like that, at least buy me dinner first" | theodore nott | flufftober masterlist | 835 words
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"Let's divide the project, do our part separately, and leave it at that," you stated, dropping your books on the desk beside Theo as if to punctuate your statement.
"Why hello to you too," Theo grinned, unperturbed by your stormy mood. Mostly because he knew it would further annoy you, and partly because he thought you were cute when you were annoyed. You may have been rivals who had the misfortune of being paired together for an important project, but he was not blind.
You settled yourself in the seat beside him, ignoring his sarcasm. Opening your book, you took out your pen to write down the project steps when Theo gave you a page he prepared that contained a detailed breakdown of what the project entailed and different steps you could take.
You reached in your bag to fish out your pair of reading glasses. Theo tried to ignore how adorable it made you look. He was already hyper aware of everything about you and the way you made him feel, he did not need to add more fuel to that flame.
You read the document and you hated to admit it, but it was excellent. It was another point he had won against you. Embarrassment crept up your cheeks as he managed to be a step ahead of you. "Well, this is certainly helpful," you said, trying to keep the neutral tone in your voice. You tried to hide how it ruffled you, except your blush revealed it all.
Theo reacted with a cocky grin, "stick with me y/n and you may learn a thing or two."
"I do just fine on my own," you narrowed your eyes.
"Except we do have to work on this project together. See that," he said, pointing to the third step he outlined in his document. You leaned in to read the section he indicated, your shoulders pressed together. The scent of his woodsy cologne invaded your senses and it took you by surprise.
You shifted your gaze from the page to his face. You blinked in surprise, he was so near. For the first time, you noticed his long lashes. The way his wavy hair fell near his eyes and you were tempted to brush it back. Suddenly curious how soft it would feel between your fingers.
Then he turned his gaze to you, piercing blue eyes stared intently into yours. It took your breath away. He often had a bored expression that you had no idea he could be this focused.
Your lips parted a few centimeters as your mind tried to snap you out of it. You were keenly aware this stare was longer than what was polite, but you couldn't find your way out of this maze.
It achieved the opposite effect as Theo's eyes shifted to your lips. From this close, he noticed how full they were. They looked so soft, he wanted to reach out with his lips just to confirm he was right. Heat bloomed within you as your heart pounded faster in your chest.
Seeming to catch himself, he looked back up, a secret desire swirling into ocean blue of his eyes. He cleared his throat, the spell of the moment over. Your eyes snapped back to the page as he took a second to remember his words.
"We need at least two pairs of hands to complete this step," he finished his sentence from earlier.
You sighed, deflated. There was truly no other way. "You might be right."
"What's that?" Theo leaned in, "you think I'm right?"
You scoffed, "don't get used to it.
He lowered his voice as he whispered in your ear, "but you know, if you're going to stare at me like that, at least buy me dinner first."
Your eyes widened as you opened your mouth to speak then closed it a few times, the words lost in the recesses of your mind. You stopped when you realized it made you look like a fish out of water. "You can't tell me what to do," you countered.
Theo continued, "pretty girl like you, I wouldn't say no."
You blinked, "you think I'm pretty?"
"I have eyes, y/n. I know you think you're better than me but come on. I'm not blind," he replied, waving his hand to dismiss the topic.
He brought the conversation back to the project, dejected by your horror at the thought of going out with him. But with the way you looked at him earlier, he could have sworn you felt the same way he did.
Theo was uncertain and he hated not knowing. Part of his academic prowess lent itself to his innate curiosity about things. He shifted slightly in his seat so his leg brushed briefly against yours and he enjoyed the electric rush from the contact.
As you both wrote down your plans, he made a mental note of another one. You were a question he was going to answer before this project was over.
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cyberskulzzz · 6 months ago
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In honor of me moving and not having wifi the last three days I made this while I was gone:
Moving in with Rodrick Heffley Headcanons!🎀
(not proof read)
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Prompt: After years of touring together, you and Rodrick finally move into your first stable home.And you two try to find compromises on your decor styles. 
(You’re both in your twenties now. Think grunge/punk x coquette/girly vibes,iykyk.)
•Obviously Rodrick lives for his subculture its not just his style, it’s self expression. While you’ve lived together on tour, moving into a real apartment together feels completely different,you quickly notice the clashing of your guys’s visions for your home. 
•This is the first time since high school that either of you has had a stable place to call home,not couch surfing or living out of suitcases. 
•So to prepare you sat down together and made a list of what your new place needed,separating responsibilities for furniture and decor to each of you. 
•Now the actual clash,Rodrick assumed your decorating style would stay simple, like it was used to be on the road,mostly black and leather,with a few pink accents here and there to bring in your personality. However now that you guys had that rockstar budget and you could buy your whole ass pinterrest board,you were way to excited to not do so. 
•But when you came home and he saw the boxes filled with bows, pastel furniture,and candles, he was visibly overwhelmed.
•“Don’t you think this is a bit much?”
“I don’t fuck with pink that much, babe.”
“We don’t need, like, twenty bows in one place. Not even Santa’s elves have that many yk.“
•But before you could respond annoyed,you noticed his decor piled by the door: thrifted, torn items he’d collected over the years. Leopard print blankets, a beat-up leather couch, a black table covered in graffiti and stickers, and a few lava lamps.
•The two of you argued for about 30 minutes before Rodrick,got fed up
•: “Let’s just put everything up and see how it looks. If it’s terrible, we’ll fix it.”
•You agreed,mostly hoping your style would take over the atmosphere if you decorated faster.
•Luckily the feared clashing of your styles wasnt bad at all,to your surprise. 
The apartment ended up looking like a chaotic mix of grunge and coquette.Your Yankee candles sat next to his record player, your novels next to his cds.
•Rodrick hated the pile of decorative pillows on your bed. When he found out they were “just for decor” and needed to be put off the bed every night, he lost it. Your bedtime routine didn’t help either: silk sheets, incense sticks, humidifiers, and meditative audiobooks. It drove him crazy,at first. But after the first time you gave him a sheet mask and a skincare session, he was asleep in minutes. Now, he doesn’t mind the routine,as long as he’s included. 
•Rodrick is surprisingly chill about letting you take over the kitchen and bathroom essentials. He couldn’t care less if he’s drinking out of a hello kitty mug or drying off with a pink towel after showering.We know damn well that man is comfortable in his masculinity. 
•Rodrick is an excellent host,being used to having many people around on tour.Your friends, family, and band members always feel welcome,sometimes even overstay their welcome. There’s ALWAYS someone around on the weekends.  You two have a whiteboard by the door where guests can scribble little messages or doodles. Next to it is a Polaroid wall, filled with pictures of you and Rodrick from all the way back in high school. 
•The guest room doubles as a writing/home studio.Rodrick often disappears to “work,” but you know he’s just messing around on his drums half the time,needing to clear his head. 
•You constantly have to remind him of things like throwing away trash or closing the toothpaste. (Susan is so thankful for you when she sees the improvement lol.)
•It’s a little messy, a little chaotic, but filled with love and you couldn’t care less. 
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paropamisus · 2 months ago
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Alternate au König (Idk yet but i'm thinking 1300s medieval), where reader's family business is doing horribly. Like fully drowning in debt, going bankrupt, about to lose all social standing, when your family's savour arrives. Well he was your family's savour but your childhood rival.
You never knew what was up with the guy, always silently and eerily staring at you, scaring away all of your friends and being a constant irritating presence. Even in school, he always had to prove just how better he was by excelling you in every aspect and then he just had to go off to train to become a knight. Becoming the pride of the entire village. After 10 years when he finally returned, he had even earned a title for himself, Settling in some fancy manor located in the outskirts of the village, seriously who does he think he is?
Annoyingly, König had offered to save the family business in exchange for one thing, your hand in marriage. What you didn't know was how hard König had to work to ensure that your family's business was on the brink of collapse, after all this is a much easier method of finally having you rather than kidnapping. You would've made any courting process incredibly hard and König could not have handled your rejection over and over again. The guy couldn't even help it, social anxiety just made it so hard for him to get your attention, so he had to settle with doing other things. Isn't it great how academically gifted he is? and how much faster than the other kids he was? even from a young age Konig tried to be the perfect man to provide for you.
Unfortunately for him, that translated across as König being a total asshole. But even he recognised that you deserved so much better than this small village, that you were destined for greater things by his side. So he set off to make a name for himself, how else was he going to prove that he was the perfect husband for you?
When König finally returned, knighted with a few lordships under his belt, he was finally ready. Only problem was that you just had to hold onto those childhood grudges, scowling at him whenever he made his way into town, and going out of your way to avoid him. Clearly courting would never work and he had to get creative.
Naturally he could always use and abuse his titles to slightly alter how your family was doing financially. Spreading small rumours here and there, burning a warehouse or two down, and sending further funding to competitors. It wasn't long before his actions bore fruit and he could finally step in to save you, ready to sweep you off your feet and stake his claim.
After all, that new manor of his was oh so cold and empty, won't you help him warm it up Hase?
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reiding-writing · 8 months ago
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Can i get a workshop session? How about spencer with a reader who's actually smarter than him? Maybe she's younger too, thanksss
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GENIUS² — SPENCER REID!
working alongside another genius was a blessing, in more ways than one.
early!seasons!spencer x reader | fluff | 1.3k | event masterlist.
main masterlist.
a/n— the genius x genius trope is great i love it
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Spencer Reid prided himself on being one of the smartest people in the room.
At 24 years old, he was a genius with an IQ of 187, three PhDs under his belt, and an eidetic memory that made him practically a walking encyclopaedia.
His mind moved faster than 99.7% of the world’s population, processing information, analysing patterns, and solving puzzles with ease.
But none of that prepared him for you.
You were younger than him by two years, and while you didn’t have a wall lined with degrees like Spencer, your intelligence was undeniable.
A bachelor’s degree in Theoretical Physics had been enough to earn you a spot in the BAU, something that had surprised even you.
Hotch had seen something in you—your ability to not only understand the unsub’s behavior but to intuitively connect pieces of information in ways most people couldn’t. It was something the team found invaluable.
And it didn’t take long for Spencer to notice.
Where Spencer excelled in academic brilliance, you had a talent for thinking outside the box. You connected dots faster than most people even realized there were dots to connect.
Spencer was used to being the one with all the answers, the one who could solve problems others struggled with, but you? You were different. You weren’t afraid to speak up, even if it meant contradicting his carefully constructed theories. You didn’t care about bruising egos, least of all his, and it fascinated him.
The first time Spencer realised you were special was during a particularly tough case.
The team had been chasing down a serial killer for weeks—a cryptic unsub who left strange, undecipherable messages at each crime scene.
Spencer had spent hours poring over the notes, scrawling down numbers, symbols, and trying to make sense of the pattern, but nothing clicked. His frustration was palpable; his fingers were tapping restlessly on the desk, and his usually sharp mind felt like it was hitting a wall.
An iron wall, covered in spikes and barbed wire.
Then you had walked in. Quietly, unassuming, you hovered over his shoulder for a moment before making a suggestion that cut through his fog of confusion.
“You might be thinking about this too literally,” You said casually, your voice breaking through the silence.
Spencer looked up, frowning slightly, both intrigued and a bit defensive. “What do you mean?”
You slid into the chair next to him, your eyes scanning the pages spread out across his desk. “You’re trying to solve this like a mathematical puzzle, but uh— the letters in the corners of his notes are literally just spelling out ‘library’, so I went to the nearest library and spoke to the librarian on staff, she gave me this,”
You pull out a scrap piece of paper from your pocket and hold it out towards him, a handwritten poem.
Spencer blinked, the pieces clicking together in his mind with almost audible force as he took the poem from you.
You’d identified the connection instantly, something Spencer would have done himself had his mind not been knotted up in frustration. But instead of feeling defeated, he was astonished.
“How did you-?” He asked, genuinely curious.
You shrugged, as if it were obviousLooking at the bigger picture can be really useful sometimes,”
Spencer stared at you for a moment longer, watching as you calmly began jotting down more notes, your mind racing ahead as if you’d never even paused for breath. He realised, in that moment, that you weren’t just another member of the team. You were his equal—possibly even more than that.
From then on, Spencer found himself constantly intrigued by you. The two of you often ended up working side by side, bouncing ideas off each other in a way that was both exciting and intimidating for Spencer.
You were quick, your mind moving in a different way than his, and he found himself almost eager to keep up with your train of thought. You saw things he didn’t, caught details he might have missed, and he wasn’t sure how to handle that. No one had ever made him feel… not inferior, but challenged in such a unique way.
The conversations between you were often odd. Both of you were too intelligent for typical small talk, so you found yourselves discussing obscure facts or debating over scientific theories in the most random of moments.
Spencer would mention something about a 14th-century mathematician, and you would immediately counter with a parallel discovery made in physics centuries later. Neither of you really knew how to navigate personal conversations, so you stuck to what you both understood—facts, theories, and knowledge.
One evening, after a particularly long day spent on another complex case, the bullpen was empty except for the two of you. The team had gone home, but you stayed behind, just like Spencer always did, combing through the evidence again, searching for a missing piece.
You were seated across from him, your brow furrowed in concentration, scribbling notes onto a pad of paper.
Every few minutes, Spencer found himself glancing at you. It wasn’t something he could control—his curiosity about the way your mind worked was something that pulled him in, a constant mystery to unravel.
You were focused, absorbed in your task, and Spencer couldn’t help but admire how quickly you picked up on things. Sometimes, you were faster than him, and that realization both thrilled and unnerved him.
“You’re staring again,” you said, your voice breaking the silence without even looking up.
Spencer’s eyes widened in surprise. He wasn’t used to being caught off guard, and you did it effortlessly. “I—I wasn’t staring. I was just… thinking.”
You finally looked up, a faint smirk tugging at the corners of your lips. “What were you thinking about?”
He swallowed, his brain scrambling for an answer that didn’t sound ridiculous. “You’re really good at this,” he blurted out before he could stop himself.
Your smirk softened into something more genuine. “You are too.”
Spencer opened his mouth, then closed it again, unsure how to respond. Compliments weren’t his strong suit, and he wasn’t used to receiving them either. “I mean, you’re younger than me, but you’re just as—no, sometimes more—effective than I am. It’s… impressive.”
For the first time since he’d met you, you looked almost shy. “I’ve always looked up to you, you know,” You admitted quietly. “When I first started here, I thought you were kind of untouchable. Like, how could anyone keep up with a guy who knows literally everything?”
Spencer stared at you, speechless. The idea that you—someone he viewed as his intellectual equal, if not superior—had once looked up to him was almost unbelievable. It made him see you in a different light.
“Well,” he said, after a long pause, ���I guess we keep each other on our toes.”
You smiled at that, leaning back in your chair. “Yeah, I guess we do.”
A comfortable silence settled between the two of you. It was a strange dynamic—two people too intelligent for normal conversations, yet too awkward to fully acknowledge the unique bond that had formed between you.
But it worked. You pushed each other, kept each other sharp. Whenever Spencer stumbled over an obscure reference, you were there to catch it. When you went too far into the realm of abstract thinking, Spencer reeled you back in with hard logic.
You were a perfect balance—an unstoppable team, even if neither of you would say it outright. And in a world where people rarely understood either of you, you had found something important in each other, an unlikely equal.
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ethereal-blossom · 1 year ago
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Giving BSD boys a blowjob for the first time
ft. dazai, kunikida
warnings: blowjobs (surprise!) MDNI
a/n: kinda wrote these in mind thinking it was also giving them a handjob for the first time so I guess that's double the fun!
Dazai Osamu ♡
Your eyes looked up to find Dazai's face, searching for a sign of approval. In response, Dazai let out a validating, soft moan and closed his eyes as he nodded. "You're doing excellent, belladonna."
It wasn't unexpected. Dazai, sharp and observant as a hawk, had seen the way your eyes lingered over every small change in his facial expressions. While you were dating, both of you had agreed to take things slow. Even small milestones like holding hands was a huge thing for the man that was wrapped in bandages. The slow burn of deepening your relationship into each other's hearts until it left a permanent mark that even time couldn't erase, was wonderful.
But with time grows desire. Dazai teased you to the point of dilated pupils, hitching breaths, and a blush that cups your cheeks. Exactly like planned, the detective thought, smirking behind the mask of crafted innocence. Except, the plan had been for you to beg him to touch you; not that you would beg to make him feel good as your fingers pushed his hips onto the couch. Dazai is highly aware of his intelligence that makes him read people as if they are a children's book, but sometimes, he thinks he doesn't always grab your nature. The type of nature that has you on your knees in front of him, getting high off of his pleasure.
When you wanted to focus your attention back on the twitching cock in your hand, the sight of Dazai's fingers grabbed your attention. You knew Dazai better than any living soul. Although still a mystery novel that hides behind words of deceive and avoidance to keep parts of itself hidden until the time of reveal is there, this mystery novel was slowly showing you its pages that brought you closer to the truth.
One of the mysteries revealed was Dazai's massive self-control over his external reactions. Emotions were another vulnerable aspect of what it meant to be human, and Dazai hid them masterfully. A part of that was because it functioned as a tactic to reach his goals and stay in control, but a part of you wondered if it was because Dazai feared vulnerability more than a bullet. Emotional suffering is torture for the ones with a sensitive heart.
While Dazai's face was decorated in controlled bliss and his moans playing like a soft lullaby, the slender fingers around the sheets were clinging for dear life. You see... could you make another crack in that composed facade?
Your thumb starts drawing circles over Dazai's tip and with that, you witnessed the twitching of both his cock and fingers. A soft groan escaped Dazai's clenched jaw. "Ah, that's my belladonna. You're soo good to me, hm? Working hard for that reward." That controlled tone...
... It wasn't enough.
Dazai could tell something changed. Even though he had his eyes closed in concentration, clinging to the tiny bit of control he had, he noticed how your stroking became irregular. "What's filling your mind that isn't my- argh, shit." Dazai's eyes shot open as he bolted his hips deeper into your mouth, leaving you gagged for a good second.
That face of pure shock and arousal, the one you rarely got to see on your lover, revealed itself to you as you had taken Dazai's tip into your mouth. "Y/N, that's-"
Another lick and Dazai's original sentence was replaced by a moan, and the detective felt like all control slipped between his fingers when you placed your hands around the rest of his cock.
Dazai grabbed your hair, hissing you to go slower because oh God, he was about to cum faster than he ever did in his twenty-two years of living, and God knows he did not want this euphoria to end this soon. Oh, he really wasn't used to feeling this good-
"Belladonna, y/n, please-" Dazai didn't know what he was begging you for. For you to go slower? Faster? What it was, you hummed in approval. That little vibration was all it needed for Dazai to throw his head in his neck. His toes curled as high-pitched whines fell over lips that had become swollen in a miserable attempt to hide his moans.
When you looked up after swallowing, you were met with Dazai's bangs hanging over his eyes. "Osamu, are you okay?" Worried, you push the chocolate colored bangs aside and... oh.
He was so pretty with scarlet painted cheeks. Dazai couldn't even look you in the eyes, giving up after one second of eye-contact before shyly facing another side with his head. "That was... good. For a first attempt."
You chuckled as your hand caresses the cheek that faced your way and with a slightly hoarse voice you respond: "Good. I'll make you even feel better next time."
Dazai's hands twitch one last time before he closes his eyes and mentally picks up every string that he lost along the way. As the detective opens his eyes, you can see the control and seduction in those dark eyes that you love so much.
Dazai leans closer until you feel his breath on your ear. His lips tickle and a shiver runs down your spine as he whispers: "Someone has earned that reward, hasn't she? Let's see how long I can make you last."
Kunikida Doppo ♡
Rubies could not compete with the radiant red glow of Kunikida's face as he realized what you were about to do. The detective should have known you were up to something when he was preparing today's schedule and you had popped up behind him, placing your arms around his waist as you kissed his neck and whispered: "Keep a spot open at 8 PM, love."
Even when the blond had asked for details, your lips stayed sealed. The only hint Kunikida got out of you was "Dazai has made you work over-hours; I want to treat you."
Naively, innocently, Kunikida thought you might have a dinner or massage in mind. Not that he was wrong! It was just a... different type of massage. With your tender fingers wrapped around his cock, Kunikida clenched his jaw to not make a sound, but the moan slipped away as he sighed your name: "Y/n... I, we-"
"Does it feel good, Doppo?" You made sure to rub his tip with your thumb right then, making the detective's cock drop with pre-cum.
"It- yes... yes, it feels good."
Looking up blessed you with the sight of an orderly man turned into a mess under the tip of your fingers. A wave of arousal rushed through your body, seeing the man unravel in front of you. You figured he would be vocal, but oh-
Kunikida was sensitive. The smallest movement had him throwing his head back and trusting his hip as tiny moans calling your name filled the room. Not only were his cheeks the color of fire due to the heat of your touch, but the intimacy of it all left him flustered as well.
You felt a hand rest on your head, lightly gripping a bit of hair. "Y/n... we, you- I have to make you feel good, too."
Oh. "That has to wait."
"But- ah!" The hand around your hair tightened in response to your mouth taking his cock.
Kunikida's thoughts were twirled up in the storm that was you. Your name rolled off his tongue like worshipping prayers as you brought Heaven to earth for him.
The bliss of touching Heaven became too much, and with one closing word, Kunikida fell apart. He arched his back, forgetting to bite his lip to soften the groans that might slip through the walls where his colleagues live. His grip around you tightens, never wanting to let you go, never wanting to let this feeling go. But then Kunikida realizes he's still on earth and lessens his grip on the fear he's hurting you.
The detective looked into your eyes, but they were filled with lust directed at him and God, it felt so sinful that he had to deflect his gaze. Yet, you grabbed his chin and made your boyfriend face you.
"Do you feel better?"
Kunikida stammered, trying to get out a word. "Yes, that was," an embarrassed cough, "excellent." 
Your thumb caressed his lip. "Good."
And then, the world flipped around as Kunikida lay your back on the bed. "I have done a deep-dive research on how to please you when the time was there. Now, let me return the favor." 
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deldaydreams · 4 months ago
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Warning: yandere stuff, stalking, gender-neutral reader. English is my second language.
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You woke up to the annoying sound of your phone alarm. Another day, time to go to work again. As an ordinary Gotham resident, you had a mostly monotonous life, at least until the last few months. As you got ready and stepped out the door, a cheerful voice called out to you.
“Good morning Y/n.”
Your opposite neighbor Richard Grayson, had his usual bright face on, and you didn’t want to deal with him in the morning.
“Good morning.” You replied.
“Are you going to work? Do you want me to drop you off?”
Oh no, definitely not. However, before you could refuse, your next door neighbor suddenly opened the door in a hurry.
“I’m late! I told you to wake me up earlier! Oh good morning Y/n.”
Your next door neighbor blushed slightly as he noticed you. Dark circles under his eyes, a coffee in his hand, untied shoes…Yup your next door neighbor Tim Drake was on his form again. While Dick laughed at the situation, you simply said good morning.
“Thank you for the offer but it’s really not necessary.”
You tried to decline Dick’s offer but this guy knew how to convince you.
“Come on, are you going to walk to the bus station at this hour? It’ll be faster and more comfortable.”
-
Okay, Dick had convinced you again with his excellent persuasion skills. You took a deep breath as you got in the car. That pressure was on you again. The feeling of being watched down to your bones… The feeling of being watched had been on you for the last few months. At your home, at your workplace, on the street… A paranoia that you couldn’t understand why you felt had taken over you. Especially your new neighbors who had moved in all of a sudden didn’t make you feel comfortable. You mean, it’s wrong to think like that about your friendly, helpful, smiling, nice neighbors for no reason, but you swear that whenever you looked into their eyes for more than a few seconds, you felt that weird feeling. Trapped? Suffocated? You couldn’t name it.
“You don’t seem to be able to sleep, is there a problem?”
Dick asked worriedly.
“Hmm? I guess so.” You answered.
“Is there a problem?” Tim turned around to make eye contact with you in the backseat.
“Nightmare.” You answered. Dick laughed at your answer.
“If there really is a problem Y/n, tell me. Other than that, be careful about your sleep or you’ll end up like Tim.”
You told the truth but didn’t answer back and Dick’s joke had lightened the mood a bit.
-
“Dear passenger Y/n, we’ve arrived at your drop-off point. We Grayson transportation would like to thank you for choosing us.”
“Thanks for the ride.” You got out of the vehicle.
“Of course it was an honor for us. We wish you a good shift.” He blew you a kiss through his open window, and Tim started scolding him from behind.
You nodded and headed towards your workplace. The strange journey was finally over. Oh, by the way, he was going to stop by on patrol tonight, right? You could have asked him about this ‘nightmare’ thing.
-
“You got a lot. Are you going to make a cake or something?” Jason Todd, your neighbor next door to Dick , asked while carrying the bags. To be honest, he was the least annoying of the neighbors. He was very polite despite his tough looks . But sometimes he could be annoying.
“Uh huh. I’m going to make cookies.”
You answered. Literally five minutes ago you nearly screamed when he suddenly appeared behind you and tapped you on the shoulder.
“Well, will you send me some too, right ?” He asked with that mischievous grin of his.
“I’m having you carry them so your muscles can be useful. Think this as a workout . But if I do extra, I’ll send them.”
Jason laughed.
“You’re the best.”
-
“I’m sorry, I didn’t wanted to stop you in the middle of your patrol, but I’ve had the feeling that I was being watched for the last few months. And last week, when that thing was watching me at night…”
“No problem, but are you sure?” Robin asked while eating one of the cookies you made.
“I’m not sure since it was night. I thought I saw its silhouette in the dark but I couldn’t open my eyes completely because I was scared. But its face was so close. I swear I could feel its breath. If you have free time, it would be nice if you could take a look.”
“We’ll take care of it. Don’t worry.” Batman replied reassuringly.
-
“We dropped them off at work. But they looked tired.”
“I helped them carry the bags. They were going to make cookies.”
The day’s report was being given in the bat cave after the patrol. Batman and Robin had finally returned.
“One of us got caught.” Bruce got right to the point without beating around the bush as he got out from the Batmobile.
“I think it’s either Todd or Drake who got caught.” Damian got out of the Batmobile with a plate of cookies in his hand.
“Wait, are those the cookies that Y/n made?” Tim pointed at the cookies.
“Yes. And I emphasize, they’re all mine because they were made for me.” Just as a fight was about to break out over the cookies, Bruce intervened.
“There is a more important matter. Y/n noticed one of us watching them at night. We need to change plans.”
“Perhaps it is time for them to move into the manor , Master Bruce.”
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brandyoxo · 5 months ago
Text
(nsfw, sugar daddy levi! X sugar baby reader)
(Reader is a teasing slut hhhhh)
You’ve known Levi since the third month you came to LA to study for a master’s degree.
At that time, you still did part time job and tried to afford part of the fee by yourself, reliving the burden on your parents.
Fortunately, you met Levi.
Yes, fortunately.
Since then, it’s been 3 years. He helps you a lot, in finance, in life, sometimes you think he’s like your mentor or benefactor….except the truth that you two will fuck.
At first, it’s more like a routine, and you would be the one that mentioned you could give him a head or let him relive his need on you.
But now, don’t know if it’s because this relationship lasts longer than you two thought, it’s kind of….casual now.
Like exactly now, he picked you up after you finished your work, and you teased his thigh by your left hand.
Levi frowns and side eyes you.
You chuckle, “What?”
“Take your hand off me.”
You shrug and take your hand off me, which lets Levi sighs in relief. But as the moment your hand leaves, two hands unbutton your own skirt.
Levi scoffs, “Shit, don’t do anything stupid.”
“What? I’m busy these days, and we haven’t seen since two weeks ago ! Pleasing myself is normal.”
You say as you put your legs on the front of the seat, spread it open and use fingers to tease your throbbing clit.
Levi almost wants to close his eyes.
“That’s dangerous…..”
You smile and take one of his hand, use his fingers and slide in yourself. Levi doesn’t protest, and he adds more fingers in your slit.
“Ahhh…it feels so good….”
Levi pushes his fingers in and out, but his gaze is still paying attention to the front. “How’s your work going? Looks like you’re under lots of pressure.”
You let him pumps in you faster, and you throw your head back and moaning.
“Ahhh….not good tho….oh…shit….deeper…ahh…”
“What’s going on?”
Levi’s fingers move faster and deeper, you fidget on the seat, while your toes start curling.
“Fuck….ahhh…..ahhh…”
Levi presses your clit by his thumb, and you reach the peak and pant.
“Oh my god…..”
Levi pulls his fingers out. “Tissues.”
You side eye him and pout. “Am I that dirty?”
“Yes, you are,” Levi looks at you when the last red light which just in front of his house flashes. “So only I can fix you.”
You smile to his words, and you pick up your skirt, while he’s parking.
Both of you get used to each other, you think. But you two still stay the sugar daddy and baby relationship, which means he will still pay you money for sex.
But somehow you don’t like that.
Yes, being with Levi is fortunate. But falling in love with him is unfortunate.
He’s an excellent person. You won’t look down on yourself, but the truth is he’s too good.
Tonight you want to talk about this with him. Either ending this relationship, or……you want to date him officially.
“Have you eaten?” Levi asks you when he unlock the door.
“Oh…” you rub your belly.
“Haven’t?” Levi holds the door for you, “What do you want to eat, spaghetti?”
“Ok, thank you.” You reply.
Levi takes off his coat, he usually wears suit and tie, and he will pull off his tie, and the buttons on his chest will be unbuttoned, which looks very sexy.
You look at him, a muscular man is heaven to you.
He starts making food, and you sit on the kitchen island behind him.
When he turns around to get the ingredients, you spread your thigh open and pull him between.
His hand still on the ingredient beside you, although his eyes can’t take off from your face.
You lower your head to kiss him, he releases the ingredients and pulls you closer, pressing your head.
His tongue takes away the breath in your chest, his teeth nips your lower lips. You can’t breathe, and he moves his lips to your neck, leaving open-lips kiss on it.
“Let me cook for you, alright?”
He looks at you. You pout to him.
“I…..I have something to tell you, before you do this sweet thing for me.”
Levi surprises a bit.
“What? You want to buy something?”
“No…” you roll your eyes. “I….i just want to end this kind of…relationship?”
Levi freezes. But his hands are still on your thigh and head.
“I’m sorry, but I break the rules.” You continue, “I fall in love with you. But you can’t blame me for this, you’re too damn attractive —“
“But you want to end this now?” Levi says.
You can’t stop the heart beating.
“Yes. But I want to ask something else from you…” you look at him, “….what if we date officially?I mean, if you don’t want that’s okay, after all you’re brilliant,you totally deserve better than me —“
He cuts you off by crashing to your lips. The impact makes you fall behind, and he pulls you beneath him, kisses you intensely that you can’t even think.
Levi parts your thighs apart, and his unbuttons your skirt again, throwing that away.
His hand squeezes the inner side of your thigh.
You pant and whine in his mouth.
Levi let’s go of your mouth.
“I’m glad you’re the one who brings this up.”
His eyes get darker. “I don’t have that fucking gut to ask you about this.”
Your eyes widen. “What do you mean?”
He nuzzles his face in your neck, murmuring, “Doesn’t matter.”
You cup his face and grin. “You love me too?”
Levi’s hand slowly pulls your panties down. His gaze is full of lust and need now. “I’m so into you.”
You smile a little after he said that.
You grasp his muscular arm that stay on the counter, “Levi…..don’t cook now, cook later.”
Levi nips your jawline, “I am not in that mood now when you stay like this.”
You laugh and wrap your legs around his waist. Levi uses on hand unbelt his pants, his gaze still locks on you, you stick your tongue out and lick your lower lips.
He can feel his dick get harder, it hurts.
If you don’t stop him, he has to bare this pain and cook your dinner, even has to wait for you finishing dinner, then he could fuck you.
But now, it’s getting simple.
“Missionary? Backshot ?” You take off your upper clothes and use his hand to play with your tits.
You didn’t get the answer. Levi holds your hips and thrusts into you with no hesitation.
You moan. “Oh…daddy always likes to fuck in missionary first….”
Levi lowers his body and kisses you. Your moan is swallowed by him, as his pace gets faster and deeper into you, you push his chest.
“Ahhh….fuck….”
He pulls his hips back slightly before slamming forward again, stretching you wider around his thick dick.
“Look at me.”
He demands, his hands tightening around your hips as he pulls you onto his lap, forcing himself even deeper inside you.
You open your eyes and bite your lips, your cute little tits up and down because of the movements.
“Yes…yes…”
“……this pussy is made for me, hmm?” His hips piston in and out, hitting places inside you that make you moan out. He's too big, too thick. He can feel your innocence tearing, your pussy struggling to adjust to his size. “Damn it...”
You start to roll your hip.
His eyes widen as you start to move your hips, meeting his thrusts. “Oh, fuck...” He picks up the pace, his thick length sliding in and out of your tight hole.
Your hips move faster, taking him deeper. He grabs your hips harder, slamming into you. The ingredients fall to the ground loudly.
You can’t stop moaning and feeling the pleasure building in your lower belly.
He hits your deepest spot, making your body jolt.
“Oh fuck…Levi….”
A dark, pleased smile spreads across his face. He starts to pound into you mercilessly, his thick cock stretching and filling you completely. The sound of skin slapping against skin fills the kitchen. He leans over you, his muscular body caging you in.
“My little doll, your hole only gets wet because of me,” He reaches under you, cupping your ass and squeezing hard. “It’s been how many…shit…how many years? You still….fuck….so fucking tight….still belong to me.”
You can’t answer him, your hands grasp the rim of the counter. You’re moaning with sobbing because of the pleasure.
He spreads your cheeks wider, his thick length pushing deeper inside you. He can feel you getting closer, your little body tensing up.
He growls in your ear, “Look at me, baby. I want to see your face when you finally break and come on my dick.”
You open your watery eyes, meeting his gray eyes, “Oh…fuck…I’m cumming….babe…oh…you fuck me so well…”
He spreads your legs wider, hitting deeper. He sees your small body tighten again. He knows you're close. He adds two thick fingers to your clit, rubbing hard.
You arch your back with moan.
His fingers move faster, rubbing your sensitive nub in tight circles. He pins your lower back down with his other hand, hitting that spot inside you again and again.
“Holy….”
Your body convulses, your small frame shaking as you finally lose control. You scream in ecstasy, your pussy clamping down on his thick cock as you cum.
You almost see the heaven at that time.
Levi groans and pulls himself out and release on your tits.
He leans down and hugs you in his arms tightly.
You two can’t cool down from that pleasure in a moment.
He kisses your sweaty neck.
“I’ll cook dinner for you later.”
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adeepdeepslumber · 2 months ago
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Hi hi hi !! 😼
May I request reo and nagi being both in love with f!reader while the three of them are best friend ? Maybe like them being possessive and jealous would be rly kewl
I just discovered your blog and I think it’s bodaciously cool already and I’m excited to read your future work !!
Feel free to ignore this btw but thank you if you end up doing it :3
oo yesss i get it 😳😳 sorry if i post this abit late i would have just posted a nagi oneshot so this might take me awhile too love u for requesting mee 🩷🩷
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you could have anyone you want. - reo mikage, nagi seishiro
jealous - eyedress
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you three were called the golden trio.
reo mikage was the all rounder, his charming looks enchanted many. not only that, he was a kind soul, but tended to be cocky sometimes. his speech alone puts others in a trance, flashing aura blinding them. though he was friendly to others, he'd have a rather ruder attitude towards those who he disliked, scaring them.
nagi seishiro was the lazy genius, despite not putting in effort into anything, he excelled at most aspects of life. though his laziness often put people off, many often were entranced by him. he was lazy, always dozing off in classes, never giving any attention to anyone. he tended to dismiss everyone, almost always in his own world.
you who caused people's heads to turn. bold, never one to shy away from anything too intense. a pearly smile from you was all it took for someone to fall for you. you were the the top third in school in studies, with reo and nagi surpassing you. you tried your best in everything, and your bold personality drew others to you.
you, reo and nagi met when you were 10, at a playground randomly. you three just clicked together, and slowly, you started hanging out together, turning the bond between you three into superglue, keeping you three from separating. it seemed like the closeness you three could get was never ending, you three only seemed to get closer and closer together.
but obviously, that causes something new to form among it.
unbeknownst to you, you had both reo and nagi wrapped around you finger.
as they hung out more with you, they realized that feelings started to develop for you. the wide and confident smile you bore on your face sent their ears to flush red, and the tight hugs you would provide them comforted them with a warmth.
however, both reo and nagi knew that the other also had feelings for you. this caused a silent opposition to spark between the two.
oblivious as you were, even you'd notice the tension in between the two when they were with you.
reo would casually hold your hand tightly, walking with you to the next class, while the slacking nagi tried his best to keep up. reo's pace quickens, desperate for nagi to be left behind, just so he could have more time with you.
nagi would call you over to come to his house and game, leaving out the part that he never invited reo, to spend more time with you.
their actions slowly grew more and more obvious, but somehow you really never caught on.
"hey, wanna go to a cafe for lunch later? just the two of us?"
reo asked you casually, his heart beating faster and faster as he stared down into your eyes as you contemplated the thought. recently, you did realize that their actions seemed to revolve more around you and not around whatever else it should be. you'd always push it off, but now it started to bug you more.
"reo, but what about nagi?"
your innocent question was enough to make reo's eyes narrow, jaw clenching slightly at the mention of nagi's name. his eyes darted around the room, as if an excuse lay there.
"nagi.. is busy." giving a sour smile, completely not acknowledging that nagi was right behind him.
"i'm busy?" nagi asked from behind reo, his question innocent, but clearly laced with spite and jealousy. seeing each other, reo managed a sour smile, full of frustration, as nagi was clearly going to tag along.
"thought you were" reo muttered under his breath, before offering to walk you to class. the tension was so clear between the two of them, that you couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. this was clearly unlike them.
nagi muttered something that wasn't full audible, before completely draping himself over you. suddenly so clingy, but you never cared for it.
your captivating self drew everyone to you, despite you not noticing it. you could have anyone you want, but these two pined for you.
week after week, their actions became bolder and bolder, even your friends started suspecting they had feelings for you. well, you always brushed it off, but you couldn't deny that even you started suspecting it too. well, it came to light one day.
you went to the school campus on a weekend, to drop off some items for reo and nagi for their upcoming soccer match. when you were walking to the locker room to drop them off, it came to your mind that you didn't inform them in advance that you were coming. should be fine, right?
well, when you almost opened the door to the locker room, you could hear an agitated reo and a tired nagi.
"nagi, you like her don't you?" by guess, you thought that nagi would deny it, but surprisingly you head a faint "yeah".
reo too admitted it, and it finally dawned upon you that your two best friends, from childhood, came to have feelings for you. the two's conversation was filled with tension, hoping to win you over eventually without the other. many people told you that you could have anyone you wanted, well, you never expected that it could go to this extent.
slowly, you opened the door, revealing yourself and the totebag full of items you bought for them.
reo and nagi were caught off guard, now calculating in their minds if you'd heard their conversation.
"um. i wanted to give you guys these for the upcoming match."
holding out the totebag to them, you deliberately avoided eye contact with either of them, looking to the lockers as if your favorite drama was playing. this gave the duo confirmation you heard their conversation.
glancing at each other, nagi let out a sigh, holding his neck with his hand. while reo too let out a sigh, running his hand through his hair. taking the totebag from you, reo opened his mouth to talk to you, but you turned around quickly, determined to leave the locker room to escape the awkwardness. until nagi held your wrist, wanting you to hear them out.
"you heard us right? reo and i both like you, so give us time for us to win you over." nagi said it so casually as if he was talking about his video games, but you gotta admit, you heart fluttered at those words. reo chuckled, flashing you a charming smile, in agreement. now with the knowledge that your two best friends liked you, you were slowly getting flustered under their gazes. sticking out your tongue, you ran out of the locker rooms.
from then on, their actions towards you were bolder and more obvious, with clear effort being put in between the two to try and see who won you over first.
at one point the two were basically fighting over who would walk you home.
you can have anyone you want, but you really have those two wrapped around your finger.
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this is unwiped asscheeks and super short sorry this is so clapped I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO WRITE JEALOUSY TROPES BETWEEN TWO PEOPLE GHIOERFJKSN
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strawberryblondebutch · 6 months ago
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hi! Random question maybe, but you seem very knowledgeable about hockey: there's a post on the PWHL subreddit right now asking about the differences between PWHL and NHL hockey. A lot of people in the comments are saying the skill level in the PWHL is much lower, which to me a weird statement for multiple reasons, but I don't know enough to disagree or agree with certainty. Do you have any thoughts? In general, what do you think are the differences between the style of play in the two leagues right now (other than ofc level of physicality l)?
That is a weird statement, which I'll get into in a second. To me, the biggest differences are such.
Fundamentals. This is not a PWHL-specific statement. It also applies to the WNBA vs. the NBA, and baseball players drafted out of college vs. high school. With truly all the respect and love to my prep school coaches, college is where you learn how to play your sport. You get by on raw talent until you hit the college level (or, for Canadian men's hockey players, the junior level) and then you learn how to actually play. Men are spending 1-2 years in college before leaving for the show. Women do a full 4-5. It's hard to imagine someone like Jason Robertson (who I love) succeeding in the women's game, because he's not a very good pure skater. He got by on his raw offensive ability. If he were coming up through the NCAA, someone like Mark Johnson or Matt Desrosiers would have grabbed him and said, "You're doing extra shifts in the barn until you stop looking like you're drowning out there."
"Then the skill in nhl level is just insane. Passes are perfect, players can handle bouncing pucks easily, and most importantly positioning is excellent - players are almost always where they are supposed to be (because they are big and fast) so zone entry/exit is super smooth.
60 minutes of Flyers hockey would kill this Redditor. I can assure you passes are not perfect and positioning is abysmal in the NHL, because again... these are the fundamentals that players would learn if they weren't plucked out of college/juniors on the basis of their raw, unhoned talent.
Roster construction. This is largely a function of limited roster space. The PWHL has less than 1/4 the positions than the NHL does. In the men's game, each line has a defined role. The first two forward lines are your top scorers, the third line does most of the checking and defensive play, and your fourth O-line is meant to tucker out the opponents' best scorers. The PWHL doesn't really have checking lines, because there aren't really checking specialists. Instead, lines are determined by the whims of the coaches by a combination of seniority and "riding the hot hand" - players who score more get more ice time.
Goaltending. PWHL goalies are smaller than NHL goalies and working with the same size net. Someone like Ivan Fedotov (6'8") can take up more space just by standing there than someone like Emerance Maschmeyer (5'6"). As a result, PWHL goalies tend to be far more mobile, and they start their post-to-post movement early, trying to anticipate where the shot will come from so that they can physically get there and block it.
Speed vs. acceleration. I think the comments about size that people in that thread were mentioning are largely overblown because they forget that everything is relative. It only really counts in two dimensions. The first is in goaltending. The second is in movement. Taller players can cover more ground with each push, which helps with their speed. Smaller players, because they aren't dragging as much weight around the ice with them, can push off from a stop faster, which helps their acceleration. It's why KCS is such a pain in the ass to play against: if she and I are both standing at the starting line, she (5'2", 125 lbs) can take off much faster than I (5'10", 170 lbs) can. I can hope to close the distance by using my strength and stride, but she's got the edge on that first 200 ft. Hey, you know what else is 200 feet? A hockey rink. She beat me to the other end.
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sourpeachsayshi · 1 year ago
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Praise kink with Nanami, please😭
·˚ ༘₊· ͟͟͞͞꒰➳ minors / ageless blogs / blank blogs - do not interact.
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ tags: therapist!nanami; client!reader; guided; forbidden; doctor-patient relationship; size kink(?)
ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ notes: I went overboard with this one.
nanami's eyes darken, his glasses resting just below the bridge of his nose, irises blurring like the haze between night and day. he uncrosses then crosses his legs, desperately trying to adjust the bulge in his pants. his notebook is still resting comfortably on his lap, one of his hands fidgeting with the pen that he lightly taps against the paper, while the other traces the outline of his lip.
your legs are spread apart, your skirt flipped up, underwear pulled to the side. your shirt unbuttoned, exposing the lace fabric of your pretty, pretty bra. the sight of your cunt forms a knot in his throat, which he swallows while trying to forget the many nights he's jacked off picturing himself fucking you.
the one who came to him after leaving her horrible husband. who has struggled to find any sexual pleasure ever since, and who timidly admitted that she finds her underwear soaked after every session with dr. kento.
"I don't think," you sigh, your bottom lip trapped between your teeth. "I don't think this will work..."
"but you look good," he reassures, noticing your lashes flutter at his words. "Wet. I can see it from here..."
your face burns with embarrassment, and you part your lips to say something though no words come out.
"just keep listening, okay? you're doing really well for me, I promise this will help," he lies through his teeth, his cheeks tinting a shade of crimson of him abusing his role. "your middle and index finger, use it to rub your clit, not too fast...nice and easy..."
you oblige, and that doesn't take him by surprise. you listen to his guidance, start massaging the nub of your clit gently. a few minutes pass, but he's busy paying attention to your reactions. the way your breath hitches and your chest hiccupping as you try to stifle a moan.
"don't hold it in," he coos, "give in to your natural reactions. it's okay, I'm right here. I'm watching you, helping you. you trust me, right?"
"yes, doctor," you whimper and he hums in response.
"feels good?"
"uh-huh"
"you sound lovely, like you're enjoying it..."
"mmph~"
"faster. add a little more pressure, that's right..." he continues, "how do you feel?"
"warm-" you add, breathless and needy which only fuels his desire. "I l-like it, I like how it feels..."
"This is excellent progress, I'm proud of you," he praises, a hint of a devious smile ticking the corner of his lip. "try putting a finger in, there you go..."
his eyes narrow as you sink your middle finger into your hole. you gasp in slight shock, taken aback that you actually enjoyed the tiny stretch. nanami nearly snaps the pen his half. knowing full well that the length and thickness of his fingers would do far, far better.
you pump in and out, so slowly like you're trying to figure out what pacing you prefer. "doctor kento," you moan, though you are not addressing him with anything specific except to simply call out his name.
his cock twitches.
he takes his glasses off, and folds it neatly between his pressed shirt. he closes his notebook, the page filled with mindless scribbles that he put together to distract himself from being aroused by you.
"when we discussed your sex life prior to your marriage, you mentioned you enjoyed receiving oral," he states.
you gaze up at him with doe eyes from underneath your lashes, finger fucking yourself tenderly as you shake your head in confirmation.
he gets up from his seat, takes a few steps closer as he carefully rolls up his sleeve. he kneels before you, the afternoon light sparkling against his golden hair. his face far too close to your cunt.
"a more manual approach might do you some good," he mumbles, his large palms reaching for your plush thighs.
the heat burns behind your ears and down your neck, your muscles in your lower belly start quivering with delight and anticipation.
"you're gorgeous, by the way," he admits, dropping his professional mask and allowing his inner thoughts to speak on his behalf. "it's a shame your ex couldn't appreciate that..."
he moves on hand to circle around your wrist and draws it away from your soaking cunt. he brings your shaking fingers to his lips to taste your essence before releasing you with a pop.
"so sweet," he purrs. he drops your wrist, his hands smoothing over your inner thigh and over the curve of your pelvis. when he looks up at you, you almost don't recognize the devilish expression on the face of such a gentleman. "you deserve to feel this good. may I?"
you melt into the pillow behind you, your heart pounding so hard against your chest it makes the room around you spin.
"we'll go for as long as you can handle. alright, sweetheart?"
"yes, doctor kento"
"good girl," he murmurs, the depth of his voice making you tremble in your seat. "such a good girl..."
your eyes roll to the back of your head, a cry leaving your lips that sounds like an ache when he brings his tongue to your sex and drags upward along the glittering slit.
no more secrets x
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pkg4mumtown · 4 months ago
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I Bet You Look Good in Pink (On the Dancefloor)
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Male!Reader
Rating: Mature
Summary: You panicked and grabbed some poor stranger off the street to be your fake boyfriend to get your mom off your back. What could go wrong?
Content Warnings: Crack, fluff, meet cute, first kiss, first person pov, male reader, fake relationship
A/N: This is pure crack influenced by this guy I saw doing videos walking up to dudes saying “I’m out with my husband, say hi mom” and wanted to explore Hotch reacting to that while Rossi ran amok at the end. That’s it. That’s the fic. Enjoy!
Also available on AO3. I recommend having work skins on if you do, so you can see the social media and text skins.
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I was set out on a brisk jog—more of a speed walk, who was I kidding—before work to prepare my mind for the day's stresses. All that went to hell in a handbasket when I felt my phone buzz and my earbuds start playing a jingle, which only meant that my mother was calling me. 
I’d been dodging her calls for weeks knowing she was asking whether or not I was bringing my “boyfriend” to my cousin's wedding. I had made the smart decision to tell my mom I was seeing someone—a total lie—thinking I could make several excuses about his absence and things would be okay, considering I didn’t see my mom as often as I should.
Then, my cousin just had to announce a wedding on short notice. 
I had never wanted someone to call off a wedding so badly in my life. My mother couldn’t resist meddling either and marked me down as having a plus one without consulting me first.
“Patience” and “understanding” were not words I would use to describe my reaction.
I groaned when I saw that it was a video call, too. Sighing heavily, I answered the phone and picked up the pace again, hoping the loud sounds of the city and my huffing and puffing would get her off the phone faster. Knowing her, I wouldn't be so lucky.
“Hey, Mom,” I breathed heavily, my feet pounding on the pavement. 
“Hi, honey, I wanted to talk to you about Vanessa's wedding.”
“Yea? What about it?” I asked nonchalantly barely able to hold in my labored breaths, looking forward rather than at the phone so I didn't trip and eat the pavement.
“You haven't double booked anything have you?” she asked, a wary tone to her voice, expecting me to cancel at the last minute.
“No, Mom. I didn't forget.”
“Then, your boyfriend is coming, right? I think it’s been long enough that I should meet him, sweetie,” she smiled on the other end. 
Honestly, she was right. I had told her about “him” about six months ago, being as vague as possible every time he was brought up.
My brain—on the other hand—had other ideas causing me to immediately panic, not knowing how to respond. If I told her I lied to her and that he wasn’t real or that we “broke up", she would be back to hounding me and trying to set me up with every man she met. If I made another excuse, she would be suspicious. I almost felt bad lying to her, but “getting the hint” was not one of her strong suits.
As my brain warred with itself, I spotted another man running just up ahead dressed in a dark t-shirt, shorts, and plain running shoes. He was slowing down as we approached a crosswalk with flashing red lights indicating that it wasn’t safe to cross. 
This might end up topping my list of idiotic plans, but—
“Yes, Mom. My boyfriend is coming,” I raised my voice slightly as I finally got to the crosswalk where the man was bouncing on his toes to stay warm. 
I noticed the vague glance he shot my way at my voice and presence, but that was the only acknowledgment I received.
He was kind of cute this close-up. His soft dark hair contrasted sharply with his light complexion. He was in his mid to late forties but clearly in excellent shape and by his stone-faced expression, a government worker like many people in this area.
“We’re actually finishing up our run, soon,” I stepped closer to him, meeting his hawk-like eyes with a pleading, pitiful expression. With reflexes I wasn’t aware I possessed, I switched the call to speaker and turned the phone toward him, “Say, ‘hi’, babe!”
The glare he gave me was a mix of incredulous confusion and wariness as he checked his surroundings like he was expecting someone to come out and attack him while I distracted him.
Definitely a government agent, then.
“Um,” he started cautiously. “Who are—"
I hurriedly tapped the mute button on the call, wanting to grab his wrist and plead like a child asking for sweets. I restrained myself, expecting that he would have me face down on the concrete in a second if I did. 
I probably wouldn’t even mind that.
“Hi, sorry,” I quickly spat my name out at him in my haste. “Please, play along. I’ll owe you my entire life, please,” I begged.
Was I being dramatic? Totally. But I was desperate to give her an actual face to get her off of my back.
One last glance around us and he relented, bending somewhat to be level with the phone’s camera. I tapped the mute button again.
“Sorry, Mom, his hearing is a little bad. Babe, say ‘hi’ to my mom,” I raised my voice, positioning myself so I was just in front of him and both of us fit in the frame.
I heard him slowly exhale behind me, then a soft smile spread over his face in the camera preview, “Hello, Ms...”
I felt him smack my back with the back of his hand, making me jump but I murmured her last name out of the corner of my mouth.
“Right, hello,” he smiled again. “I’m age—Aaron. It’s nice to finally meet you.”
“Oh, how handsome,” she winked and I felt my soul immediately leave my body. 
How childish would it be to launch my phone into the street right now?
“Yea, um, so—we're—” I started but was interrupted.
“Aaron, sweetheart, I love my son to death but his memory is awful. I hope he told you about his cousin’s wedding. I’d love to meet you there,” she interrupted me.
Aaron’s smile faded somewhat, probably internally panicking as much as I was.
“I should have stayed home,” I heard him murmur under his breath. “Uhm, no, but it’s been a pretty hectic couple of weeks for me, so it’s not entirely his fault,” Aaron covered smoothly, bringing a hand up to my shoulder and stepping closer.
Damn, he was good.
“You poor thing,” she cooed. “Well, I hope you can make it.”
“Of course, I’ll do my best.”
“Oh, and she changed the colors to pastel pink, so I hope that’s not too hard for you to come up with, honey.”
My jaw clenched. Of course, she changed the colors. Luckily, I had a navy blue suit that would go with the only pastel pink shirt I owned.
“I’ll make it work, Mom, thanks.”
I could feel Aaron glaring at me through the video preview, his fingertips digging into my shoulder. Like he was questioning every life choice that landed him in this present moment. 
I reached my hand back, fingers barely grazing the side of his neck as I looked back at him, “I think you have one.”
Aaron’s eyes flicked down to my lips and back to my eyes so quickly I almost missed it, “You would—uh—know better than me.” He sounded unfocused and dazed as he reacted to my movements.
“I think so,” I winked, pressing my lips to his stubbly chin and focusing back on the phone, seeing my mother’s eyes lit up with glee. “Anyway, Mom, I gotta go home and get ready for work. Love you.”
“Okay, have a great week, sweetie, I love you, too! It was nice to meet you, Aaron.”
“You as well,” he smiled, giving her a small wave before the call ended.
My face dropped as soon as the call was over, turning to face Aaron, “I am so sorry for that! I panicked and I’ll admit it was not my finest moment. And I’m especially sorry if that whole thing made you uncomfortable because I’m...you know...and I kissed—yea—uhm...I’m sorry.”
Aaron scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, “It’s okay.” He shifted in place, looking at the people passing us rather than me, “I’m actually...bi? Is that the word?”
This man was getting better by the minute.
“Good enough,” I smiled.
The silence stretched between us again. Was it too late to run across the street and away from this silence? I glanced at the light as it turned back to red—the third one we’ve missed now.
“I’m—uh—sorry, too,” he finally said.
“Why?” I asked him, confused, “I trampled all over your morning.”
“I thought you were distracting me to—er—hurt me, rob me, ambush me...” he trailed off, looking just past me.
I couldn't help the laugh that bubbled up my throat and morphed into a full-bodied laugh, “Honey, please...look at me.”
Aaron’s shocked face slowly cracked, laughing with me finally. His shoulders relaxed a little, not as on edge as he was when I first approached him.
He had a beautiful smile, I was learning.
“What—uh—what day is that wedding?” he finally asked as our laughter settled down.
“Oh, you don’t actually have to go. I can make something up, really,” I waved him off. “I just needed to give her a face to give my claims some validation.”
Aaron shrugged, his arms flailing slightly, “My coworkers tell me I need to get out more, so...”
Oh.
“Well, in that case...” I unlocked my phone and checked the calendar to be absolutely sure lest my mother fry me, “It’s next month. The fifth. You have approximately twenty-five days.”
How was this my life right now?
“My schedule is—well it’s unpredictable, so I’ll let you know?” he cringed a little.
Government agent. Right. No wonder his posture was so good.
“And how were you planning on doing that?” I asked with a smirk.
He froze for a second, brain rebooting, “I was hoping I could get your number, actually,” he laughed shyly, looking down and patting his pockets to locate his phone.
He fumbled with the phone for a second and finally handed it to me. Pursing my lips, I laughed to myself as I typed my name in and put “boyfriend” with a heart in parenthesis before typing my number in. I handed it back to him, seeing the way his face flushed at the name I put in. 
“I’m serious, though, if you can’t or don’t want to just let me know. You’re in no way obligated.”
“Yeah, I will,” he nodded, making a move to continue his journey.
We both crossed the street, him breaking back out into a run and me a brisk-ish stroll as I got my music playing again. I caught him looking back a couple of times, making me wonder if he was challenging me to catch up or making sure I didn’t follow him home. A smile pulled across his face as he saw me start to speed up. As we reached the next intersection, I held my hand up in a wave as I turned left while he continued straight and crossed the street.
-
Aaron POV
Aaron had been understandably wary of the man who approached him that morning. He had a dangerous job and had experienced more than enough trauma for one lifetime. 
He was ambushed. Just not like had expected.
All of a sudden, he was talking to a lady and gently touching a man he didn’t know and—
Uh.
Did he just kiss Aaron?
On his chin, but still.
He wasn't sure if he was conscious at that moment, except for the fire burning on his face.
Aaron made it home and to Quantico in a haze. He sat at his desk, staring at the phone in his hand like it might suddenly burst into flames. A phone number, a name, and an invitation. Nothing more. Nothing less.
It had been hours since the incident, and yet, the warmth of a stranger’s lips on his cheek still lingered like an unresolved case in his mind. He wasn’t sure if it was the sheer audacity and absurdity of the encounter or the way he had simply…gone along with it. The sound of the stranger’s voice still echoed—quick, clever, and just a little desperate.
"Babe, say ‘hi’ to my mom."
And Aaron—fucking—Hotchner, a man trained in several facets like terrorism, law, and behavioral analysis, had folded like a damn lawn chair.
Which is why he now found himself in a situation far more dangerous than being ambushed in the middle of a morning run—standing in Penelope Garcia’s office.
Penelope turned in her chair and blinked at him, fingers frozen over her keyboard assessing him.
“Sir,” she said slowly, looking him up and down like he had just walked in wearing a clown wig. He certainly felt like it. “Hi, sir. Hotch. Uh, sir. What… are you doing here? Do we have a case?”
Aaron didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he set a paper down on her desk where he’d written the man’s number and slid it toward her with two fingers. “Can you run this for me?” He cleared his throat. “Unofficially.”
Her eyes flicked from the paper to his face, then back to the paper. Then back to his face.
She gasped, “Oh my God. Is this—” She clapped her hands over her mouth, muffling an excited squeal. “Are you asking for a background on a new lady friend?”
Aaron’s jaw tightened, teeth grinding under the pressure, “Garcia.”
“You are.” Her voice was an octave higher, her whole body vibrating with barely contained glee. “Oh, my stars, this is my favorite day—”
“It's not—” He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “It’s not like that.”
Garcia wiggled her fingers at him. “Oh, no, no, no, sir, you do not get to walk into my office, ask me to dig into some poor lady's entire life, and then pretend like this isn’t about romance.”
Aaron exhaled sharply.
There was no easy way out of this now.
“He approached me this morning,” he admitted. “Called me his boyfriend—to his mother over the phone—and I…played along. His mother invited me to his cousin’s wedding.”
Garcia gawked at Aaron, completely glossing over the fact that Aaron had implied a man. He shouldn’t be surprised that she didn’t care, “You played along?”
He glanced away, embarrassed, “It was—unexpected.”
She pointed at Aaron accusingly. “You liked it.”
“I did not.”
“You so did.”
“Garcia—”
She cackled, typing the number in furoiusly and bringing up several windows, “Well, now I have to know who this mystery man is. I would have never guessed, boss man, but I can't judge a book by it’s cover. Oh, what if he’s a spy? Or an undercover agent? Or—”
“I was thinking more along the lines of a scam artist,” Aaron muttered.
She hummed, making a tsk with her tongue and teeth, “Doubt it. Cute guys don’t run scams, they just break hearts.”
Hotch gave her a flat look, “That’s how you—”
“Not a word,” she held a finger up. “Give me five minutes.”
And just like that, Garcia’s fingers were flying over the keyboard. The glow of her multiple monitors flashed across her face as she scrolled through the man’s life with the skill of a seasoned technical analyst and the enthusiasm of a gossip columnist.
Aaron crossed his arms, exhaling sharply at her wild glee, “Anything?”
“Oh, my dear sir, I have everything.” Garcia’s eyes widened. “Oh. Oh my God.”
Aaron's posture stiffened, leaning in closer to the screen. Dread filled his stomach at what she could have found, “What?”
“He’s adorable!”
Aaron immediately frowned, he was too old for this shit, “That’s not relevant.”
“Oh, but it is,” Penelope turned one of the monitors slightly so he could see. “Look at this. Your mystery man is a dog dad—and look at this cutie pie of a pup! He posts pictures of her in cute sweaters—sir, he’s a sweater-on-dogs guy.”
Aaron barely glanced at the screen. “And?”
Garcia gasped, “Oh, and? And? That means he has a soft heart, sir. That means he is a man of culture. Also, look at him.”
Hotch did not look at the screen. He refused actually.
Garcia, however, had no such reservations. She clicked on another post. “He hikes! Look at him in the mountains with that perfect lighting—who is taking these pictures, wow? Oh, that’s so unfair. Pretty people should not have good lighting and cute dogs.”
Aaron exhaled through his nose, long and slow. “He sure was struggling to catch up to me today.”
“He strolls, sir. Not everyone runs marathons.”
“Garcia.”
She ignored him, clicking another post, “Ooh, he bakes. He’s posted about trying new recipes. There’s a caption—‘Husband material 😏😉’.” She turned to him, eyes wide with revelation. “This is so fate.”
He finally looked at her, doing his best to look unimpressed but he was slowly softening to the man, too, “Fate?”
She pointed at the screen. “Sir, this man makes baked goods, is absolutely adorable, and randomly fake-dated you? That is the universe working in real-time.”
Aaron pinched the bridge of his nose. Why had she put so much stress on “you”? He was a catch, too.
“Oh, wait, what’s this?” She clicked on another post and let out yet another squeal, “He dressed up as a cowboy for Halloween. Sir, I swear to you—”
“I’m leaving.”
Garcia lunged forward, grabbing his wrist before he could retreat. A playful glare had her releasing him instantly. Still, Garcia looked up at him, eyes twinkling, “He’s precious.”
Aaron sighed, rubbing his temple. “Did you find anything that would suggest he’s dangerous?”
Garcia grinned. “Only to your heart, sir.”
Hotch turned on his heel and left.
Garcia called after him, sing-song, “So, are you going to call him or what?”
Aaron was not going to dignify that with a response. He had just made it to the door when Garcia made more excited yelps and beckoned him back.
“Oh, oh, wait, wait, sir, come back!”
With a sigh, he turned, “Hmm?”
Garcia spun one of the monitors toward him, biting back a grin, “So, uh. You remember when he mentioned a wedding?”
Aaron frowned, “Yes?”
“It’s real,” She clicked on a recent post. It was a screenshot of a text conversation:
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Garcia wheezed, “Sir, you are his manifested date.”
Hotch stared at the screen, resisting the urge to chuckle at his ridiculous antics. It was good to know he was actually that awkward online, too.
“…I see. To be fair, he did give me a choice.”
Garcia tilted her head, watching him carefully. “Perfect, you could just text him and say you’re not going. Or—” Her smile turned devious. “You could meet up and—you know—practice before the real thing.”
Aaron gave her a deadpan look.
She beamed.
Without a word, Aaron turned and walked out but sighed, stopping the door from shutting all the way with his hand. He poked his head back in, “Thanks, Penelope.”
MC POV
I honestly, didn’t expect Aaron to text me. It had been about a week since I ran into him. Throughout that time, I hadn’t seen him out and about any other morning. So, I couldn’t tell if he’d been avoiding me, we were completely missing each other, or he was just busy.
I chose to believe he was busy because boy would I not mind seeing him and those perfect hands again.
My thoughts were put at ease when I got a text ten days after I ran into him, smack on a Saturday morning.
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I had no idea what to reply as I stared at my phone with a puppy chewing on my sweater sleeves. 
“Mochi, no,” I absentmindedly corrected her. “Daddy needs to think.”
While I thought about a response, I saved his contact to my phone under “Aaron (Mom's Fav)”.
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I could practically feel his exasperation through the phone. But I did hope he thought I was somewhat funny, too.
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My heart felt like it was ready to jump out of my throat as I read his text. Tonight? Like TONIGHT?
“Mochi, come here, baby. I need support,” I dragged the over-excited puppy into my lap and hugged her to my lap with one hand while the other held my phone. 
What do I even say to that? Deflecting with humor sounded like a safe bet.
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Aaron’s address was sent shortly after and I wasn't surprised to see that it was only a couple blocks north of mine in the direction he ran the day we met. I threw my head back on my couch, giddy to see Aaron again. My brain finally caught up with what that meant. I was going to be alone with the man, with only Mochi as a chaperone and she couldn’t care less about who I embarrassed myself in front of. I had nothing to hide behind, no buffer, no screen, no over-excited mother to parry off of. 
Fuck. Why was I like this?
Then I realized I had a lot of work to do and leaped off the couch to make him a study guide. I had pictures of the important people: my parents, siblings, bride and groom, and some assorted aunts and uncles. I wouldn't subject him to memorizing the kids because—let's be honest—they didn't care about the old folks anyway. It wasn’t too long of a list, only about three pages that I printed out to make it easy for him.
Once I had that sorted, I thought about what to bring. Can you go wrong with brownies? Actually...I’m sure you could, but it was the most practiced thing I knew how to make without messing up considering the state of my head.
The time snuck up on me quickly and I frantically took the brownies out of the oven to cool before running to my room to get ready with Mochi hot on my heels. She guarded the shower, attacking my towels and shower mat as I hurriedly washed myself. Doing my best to not trip over her and slip on the slick floor—medical emergencies were not ideal right now—I ran back to my room to towel off and get dressed.
“Ok, little girl, what color are we feeling today?” 
I laid out a couple different collars for her, which she hopped excitedly around and chose one to attack. Lilac it was. 
“Should we match?” she gave me a beady-eyed stare, focused only on gaining possession of the collar again. “You don’t give two shits.”
I fastened the collar around her neck and tugged a matching sweater over her, taking the time to gush over how adorable she looked.
I surprisingly found a passable first-date shirt that sort of matched her and finished getting ready. In my haste, I nearly forgot the small tray of brownies as I fed Mochi and packed a couple of toys to distract her. Nearly screaming, I covered the tray and put it by the door with the other stuff so I wouldn't forget.
I was a wreck the entire drive to Aaron’s. For no reason, too. As much as I teased him, he was right. 
This wasn’t a date. But, he was hot and I was me.
I located his apartment with relative ease and waited nervously outside with an impatient puppy at my side and a glass tray under my arm digging into my ribs. His cheat sheet lay balanced atop the foil. Making a nervous whine in the back of my throat, I finally knocked with my free hand that held Mochi’s leash.
The door swung open, Aaron on the other side with a dish towel over his shoulder in a dark polo. I stared at the skin past the unbuttoned top buttons, completely missing whatever he said to me.
“—need help?” I caught at the end of his sentence.
“Oh, uh, yea sort of,” I winced as I shifted the tray, which he gladly took from me, noticing the paper on top as he ushered me inside and shut the door behind me. 
“You can let her off, it’s fine. I closed all the doors already,” he nodded to where Mochi was eagerly wanting to sniff every surface she could reach.
Wow, he’s perfect.
I unclipped her leash, laughing at the way she made a beeline for Aaron’s jeans, nipping at the material before skittering over to his sofa. I tossed the toys I brought with me to the floor, so she would leave his belongings alone.
“This is...a good look on you,” I smiled nervously, taking in the domesticity of his clothes. My bravado over text completely flew out the window.
“Mm, I was married once upon a time,” He smirked, turning back to the stove.
“Was?”
“Yea, we found out I was married to my work more.”
“Oh. I’m sorry.”
Aaron just shrugged, “It was a long time ago.”
I chewed my lip, desperate to change the topic. My eyes landed on the papers I brough with me.
“Oh! I brought this so we could go over my family.”
I picked up the papers and met him near the stove, leaning against the counter where there was free space he wasn't utilizing. He smiled softly in my direction as he cooked, nodding and stirring.
“Go for it,” he nodded.
I was surprised he wanted to start now while he was busy cooking but went ahead anyway. I would show him the picture, tell him their name and relation, and move on. He listened diligently, repeating names and making sure they were pronounced correctly before moving on. His eyes moved over the pictures like they were calculating and cataloging every little detail of their faces.  He would lean in for a closer look at the pictures, standing much closer and making me stumble over my words. My face would feel like it was on fire.
Aaron didn’t comment on it.
He was weirdly good at it, remembering faces and recalling details from short-term memory.
I wanted to ask how but didn’t want to intrude more than he was allowing me. My big mouth couldn’t be stopped, though. 
“Wh—,” I started, my voice hitching when he moved into my space and grabbed something on the other side of me. His arm wrapped around me, chest scraping mine as he looked at me expectantly to keep talking. “—wh—uhm…hmm,” I raised my eyebrows, scratching the back of my neck awkwardly under his gaze.
He sighed with an amused smile, “You can’t act like this every time I touch you at the wedding, boyfriend.”
I cleared my throat, blinking rapidly, “Act like what?”
Aaron shook his head, adding the item he grabbed and stirring briefly. He gave me a pointed look, “You freeze up and stutter.”
“I do not.”
“You do. You just did.”
Aaron set his large spoon down and crowded my space, “If you’re nervous about being close to me, then you need to get used it.” His hands framed my hips on the counter behind me, “Touch me.”
I nearly choked on my own saliva.
“I—I’m sorry?”
Aaron was unfazed, “If we’re going to sell this, you can’t tense up and shy away every time I stand next to you. So, touch me. Now.”
I stared at him, his brown eyes boring into mine with long lashes framing them. 
He’s so pretty.
I raised my hand up and pressed a finger to his chest. His very firm, very nice chest that stretched the fabric of his polo.
“Not like that,” he sighed, taking my wrist and guiding my hand more firmly to his chest.
Oh.
Brain.exe has stopped working.
I swallowed, pressing my palm more confidently against him and looking just past his head. Aaron tilted his head, purposely catching my gaze again. Picking up my free hand, I rested it on his bicep, where his shirt met his skin. 
“So—uh,” I tried to think at the same time, gently squeezing the muscle and sliding my hand around to the back of his arm. “You have a really good memory.”
“Mhm.”
“Where do you work?” I finally asked.
“For the DOJ,” he answered automatically.
“Got it, top secret,” I laughed.
He dropped his head sheepishly, “Sorry. It’s kind of an automatic answer for people I just met.” 
He lifted his head up, smiling and moving a hand to my lower back. I fought the jump that threatened to move my body and lost, tensing just a little.
“I work for the FBI,” he finished.
“That makes so much more sense,” I laughed, sliding my hand up from his chest to his shoulder.
I licked my lip as his head tilted away from my hand. 
An invitation.
Slowly, my hand made its way to his neck. His eyes fluttered shut as my fingers slipped around the back of his neck while my thumb brushed just below his ear.
“Good,” he hummed with his eyes still closed, helping my confidence just enough since I was no longer under his watchful gaze.
“This is so stupid, why am I nervous? I literally kissed your face on a whim in front of my mother.”
Aaron shrugged, “You tell me.”
Frankly, I did know. I was legitimately attracted to him beyond this whole fake dating bullshit.
He still stared, expecting an answer.
“Oh, you want me to say it out loud?”
“Yea.”
“Well, I—”
“Look at me.”
It wasn’t a suggestion.
Looking directly at him, I continued, “I think I’m just actually attracted to you and all of my confidence over text goes out the window when that happens. I don’t have anything to hide behind, you know?”
“Mm,” he hummed. “Would be hard to sell if we didn’t find each other attractive.”
Wait. 
We?
Aaron leaned forward.
I held my breath.
His lips touched my cheek, pressing a soft kiss there before straightening up and going back to the food before it burned.
My cheek was on fire.
He found me attractive, too?
Dinner was a little easier, reviewing my family again to make sure things were sticking with him. Mochi had come over at some point to chew on my shoelaces as we talked. Aaron picked her up, having finished his food first, and let her chew on his arm with her little dagger teeth. As soon as I finished, I grabbed his plate and took it to the sink—which he protested.
“You’re babysitting, it’s the least I can do,” I slapped his hand away.
Aaron kept me company instead, leaning against the counter with Mochi in his arms. We diligently went over our backstory, how we met, our first date, etcetera—knowing full well that my mother would ask every single question she could think of. Whether it was meant to be private or public.
Mochi eventually wiggled out of his grasp, running over to one of her toys, snagging it, and doing laps around the couch.
Aaron smiled as he watched her, then turned to take the wet dishes from my hands to dry them. My fingers tingled as his own fingers brushed mine, but I kept my cool and he noticed with a proud nod. 
“See? You’re doing better already.”
I roll my eyes, watching him push off the counter to put the dishes away. I turned the water off, busy drying my hands when I felt two hands come to my hips with Aaron’s breath against my shoulder. His body heat was plastered against my back. I was proud of myself for not tensing up, instead waiting for him to do something while I placed my damp hands over his as his hands met at the front of my hips.
“I’m assuming you know how to dance?” He murmured.
“Yes, I know how to dance at a wedding. I know you’re out of practice and all but this is not how you do that,” I laughed.
“Just making sure you wouldn’t jump,” he muttered, his nose brushing the shell of my ear and his lips skimming the back of my neck.
“I’ve calmed down a little, okay?” I rolled my eyes, turning to face him.
I gripped his upper arms, his arms still wrapped around me, and slid them up his shoulders until they could meet around his neck.
“Can I try something?” I asked.
He seemed to already know, eyes half-lidded and already staring at my mouth, “Go ahead."
I leaned in, pressing my lips to his gently, separating only to come back and press a little harder. Aaron’s hips closed the gap between us, arms pulling me close at the same time.
This had to be heaven.
My hand cupped the back of his head, eagerly bringing him down as my lips parted. The tip of his tongue flicked out at my bottom lip, nearly making me whine in the back of my throat. The friction of our pants did not help in that department.
I pulled back; the kiss having been much briefer than it felt. Aaron’s mouth chased mine, barely able to mutter, “Again,” before his tongue was licking my mouth open.
A moan ripped from my throat as his tongue skimmed the hypersensitive skin of the roof of my mouth. The shiver I fought made me grip him tighter and I had a vague thought about how far he was willing to take this as I felt the unmistakable brush of his hardness against mine. I pulled back, letting my hands drop to his chest to create some space.
His lips were swollen, eyes a little dark, but he was otherwise annoyingly calm. I was flustered, the line between real and fake being blurred so intensely in that moment.
“This might be a problem.”
He didn’t have to look down to know exactly what we both felt, “Only if you make it one.”
I shook my head, smacking his arm and squeezing myself out from between him and counter, “You’re insufferable.”
“You kissed me first,” he followed, stopping to grab two brownies out from the covered tray.
He followed me further down the counter, handing me one of the brownies and watching me with a vaguely amused look. I took a bite just to give myself something to do, staring at the floor and murmuring my thanks.
We just made out. We barely know each other. This is insane.
“You’ve been giving me an out this entire time but It looks like you might need one,” he took a slow bite of his own, clearly in no rush. “You’re thinking too hard about this.”
“You just kissed me stupid, give me a second.”
“You still kissed me first.”
“Are you seriously not letting that go?”
“No.”
He was so fucking smug. I hated and loved it at the same time. It made me want to kiss him again. I shoved the last of the brownie in my mouth, finally meeting his eyes and swallowing thickly.
“So, at the wedding, we’re not kissing like that.”
“Obviously, unless you plan on scarring your family,” he exhaled, sounding like a laugh. He crowded my space again, my brain going into overdrive at his heat and smell. “You specified ‘at the wedding’, which I find interesting.”
Aaron’s eyes flicked down to my mouth, leaning in and pressing a chaste kiss to my chocolate-flavored lips, then another, and another before pulling back. My eyes were still closed as he spoke, relishing the contrast of his gentle movements versus the intensity of before.
“We act normal. Just like that,” he smiled, grabbing another brownie and bringing it to my mouth.
“You’re way too chill about this,” I scoffed but took it from his hands.
“It’s more fun than I expected,” he shrugged. “Plus...I did mean it.”
I tilted my head questioningly.
“About the attraction. I was cautious of course last week because of my job, but I don’t know. After making sure you weren't a threat…I—” He paused, trying to figure out his next words, “You’re unfortunately magnetic.”
“So, what you’re saying is that my incessant text flirting worked?”
“Only a little,” he joked. “The cowboy outfit was the kicker for me.”
“Oh my God, stop!” I covered my face.
“What I’m saying is,” he laughed, prying my hands away from my face, “if you’re amenable of course—that maybe it doesn't have to be entirely fake.”
I feigned thinking, squinting one eye in thought, “So, this was a first date?”
“I think it was about three dates wrapped in one,” he pursed his lips.
“Well, I don’t put out on the third date, so it might be my time to leave,” I teased.
He just grinned, swooping in and claiming my lips. I decided then that the brownies tasted much better with him.  I kissed him as fervently as I needed air to breathe, gasping as his hips ground softly into mine purposely. 
It felt so good.
So good that by the fourth time it happened, I had to remove myself from him, “I was—mm—I was serious about the third date thing—as-as eager as I might be.”
Aaron nodded in understanding, chest heaving.
“And if you were serious before, I just-I just want to make sure, you know? If that’s okay?”
“Of course,” he smiled down at me, his reddened lips still so inviting but I needed to go before my resolve crashed and burned.
“I should go before it gets out of hand,” I smiled sadly, “but study up and keep those,” I pointed at the brownies. “Take them to work or something.”
“That’s probably for the best,” he cringed a little as he glanced down at the unruly bulge in his jeans. “You’re definitely not freaking out anymore,” he pointed out smugly.
I made some kind of noise. A flustered scoff? Panicked laugh? A dignified, manly squeak? I didn't know but I did know that if I stayed here any longer, we were either ending up in bed or I was leaving with soiled pants.
“Shut up,” I murmured, a smirk playing at my lips. “Mochi, it’s time to go home!” I called the puppy, leaning over and seeing her curled up on top of an afghan thrown over Aaron’s couch. 
I clapped my hands together, her ears perking up as she stretched. Aaron didn't try to stop me as I gathered my belongings, just leaning back against the counter looking completely satisfied with himself. He met me at the door, opening it as I carried the sleepy puppy.
“Drive safe,” he said casually, voice warm and comforting. Before I could walk out completely, his fingers pinched the center of my shirt, guiding me backwards and pressing a gentle kiss to my lips. Then obnoxiously, “See you soon, boyfriend.”
“Good night, sweetheart,” I sassed back, running my shoulder straight into the doorframe on my way out.
-
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Luckily, they had the shirt in his size and it came in a couple days before the wedding.
I rushed up to his apartment door, fully dressed for the wedding with the pink shirt in hand. The wedding wasn't far from here and it was still an hour before we needed to be there. I knocked frantically on the door, met with a still damp Aaron from the shower. 
"Oh, I could get used to that sight," I commented appreciatively, looking at his bare chest and taking my sunglasses off. 
"Are you sure it wasn't too much?" he asked about the shirt
"Hush, go get ready," I pushed him away by the chest.
He took advantage, tugging my arm to him so I would stumble forward into him. His hands grasped my hips immediately, lips finding mine easily in all the movement. 
"Aaron," I murmured trying to get him moving. "You're wet."
"Mhm," he smiled into the kiss. “Just getting some practice in before showtime.”
I fought the urge to roll my eyes.
He finally let me go and took the shirt, shaking it out and nodding as he felt the material between his fingers.
When he came out of the room fully dressed, my jaw was on the floor looking at his form in a fitted navy suit. We were fucking matching.
"You are feeding my mother, I swear," I laughed. "We look like we're about to take engagement photos."
A satisfied smirk stretched over his face at my admiration. He strode forward but stopped short.
"Where's Mochi?" He frowned.
"Oh, she would cause mayhem. My neighbor is watching her."
"You trust your neighbor with her?"
"You're so perfect," I gushed, wanting to squeeze his face. Cute aggression, I swear. "Out the door, please," I waved him toward the front door.
I didn't know how I convinced him to let me drive, but he luckily backed off as soon as I started ranting about his alpha male need to control everything and that he probably took over driving everywhere at work.
"Just be a good little passenger princess," I settled my hand on his thigh as I took off.
"I don't always drive," he muttered under his breath.
"Somehow, I severely doubt that."
The country club was a short drive, allowing us to arrive fifteen minutes early before the actual wedding ceremony was due to start. We entered the country club, following the signs for the wedding outside. The reception would follow indoors. Several signs along the way instructed guests to turn their phones off, which Aaron hesitated to do.
"Just put it on silent or vibrate. They don't want all the aunties' phones in the photographers shots," I touched his wrist, seeing him contemplate. "If you're on call just do vibrate."
"I'm not technically, I just don't want to miss a call if they do. It's a little unpredictable."
"Whatever you do, do it fast," I wound my arm around his as I spotted my mother among my family.
I heard Aaron clear his throat and shove his phone in his pocket, plastering an award winning smile on his face. 
“Oh, sweetie, you're here!” My mother ran up to me, nearly stumbling in her heels.
“Woah, careful,” I lunged, holding my hands out to catch her but Aaron was faster, grabbing her hands and stopping her forward momentum.
“Aaron, honey, how sweet are you?” she gushed, holding onto his forearms. “It's so nice to finally meet you.”
Aaron and I were dragged around to my family and he—unsurprisingly—remembered all of the information I had fed him. Throughout the ceremony, Aaron had his arm wrapped around me, hand resting on my lower back. It was strange being here with someone after expecting to be here by myself, but as I leaned my head on his shoulder I was glad it was Aaron I picked off the street. He caught me looking at him, giving me a soft smile and kissing my temple.
The ceremony was blissfully short as the afternoon sun started to heat up. I just about dragged Aaron inside after, eager to not sweat through this light-colored shirt. 
The reception started off without a hitch. Aaron offered to drive while I had a few drinks—who was I to decline such an offer—and dancing commenced while we waited for the food.
Aaron begrudgingly danced with my mother—only to slow ones per his request—but he kept his awkwardness at being interrogated hidden well. When it was my turn to dance with my fake boyfriend, I did so happily, not one to complain about being close to Aaron. 
Aaron’s hand was warm on my lower back as we swayed to the music. His thumb brushed small, lazy circles along my spine, and I was very much not immune to it.
"You're suspiciously quiet," I teased, tilting my head up to meet his gaze. "Having fun?"
"Something like that," he said, lips twitching in amusement.
"You're thinking about work, aren’t you?"
"No," he replied, then smirked. "I'm thinking about the conversation I just had with your mother."
I groaned, "Oh God. Do I even want to know?"
"Probably not," Aaron said, but the glint of humor in his eyes gave him away.
I gave his shoulder a light, playful shove. "Tell me."
He hummed, swaying us slightly to the left as another couple passed by. unable to resist, he pressed a quick kiss to my lips and continued speaking, "She asked when we were having kids."
I almost tripped over my own feet. My hand tightened on his bicep as I choked out, "She asked you what?"
"When we were having kids," he repeated, perfectly calm.
My mouth opened and closed, my brain short-circuiting. I finally sputtered out a laugh, "Jesus Christ, she didn't even ease into it?"
"Not even a little," he confirmed.
I tipped my head back with a groan, "Okay, well, the real question is—which one of us is gonna carry the baby to term?"
His lips twitched. "Hmm. Probably you."
"Excuse me?" I gave his shoulder a scandalized smack. "Why me?"
"You've got the instincts for it," Aaron said, voice low and teasing.
I blinked. My jaw dropped, "Did you just insinuate that I'm Mochi's mother? Because she knows damn well I'm her daddy."
Aaron’s shoulders shook with restrained laughter, "I'm just saying. You hover. You told me you checked her paws for three days straight when she yelped after stepping on a leaf."
"That’s called responsible pet ownership, Aaron. She’s just a baby."
"Mhm,” His thumb traced another slow circle against my back, and I absolutely did not shiver. 
Nope, not at all.
We were both grinning like idiots when my mom passed by again, shooting us a look that said: You’re next.
Aaron leaned closer, voice low in my ear, "She seemed pretty convinced we're soulmates."
"Oh God. We are never gonna live this down."
"Probably not," he agreed.
"You're enjoying this way too much."
"I really am," he murmured, then kissed my temple.
I rested my forehead on his chest, laughing so hard I almost missed his hand tightening just slightly on my waist.
It was inevitable that I would have to run to the bathroom after several alcoholic beverages. I swayed slightly as I washed my hands, grinning at my own reflection. My face was warm, appearance slightly disheveled from dancing with Aaron, and my smile wouldn't go away—not that I wanted it to. I’d spent the better part of the afternoon glued to Aaron’s side while my family peppered him with questions. He’d taken it like a champ, even dancing with some of my aunts before my mother would steal him back, all while keeping his arm casually draped around me like we’d done this a million times.
Honestly, he was too good at this. I was beginning to suspect he actually enjoyed the chaos. 
As I stepped back into the reception hall, the music thumped under my feet, mingling with the sound of clinking glasses and laughter. I scanned the crowd for Aaron’s broad shoulders, but before I could find him, my mom’s voice sliced through the noise.
"Who the hell are you, and why are you taking my son’s boyfriend?"
My heart just about stopped, what the fuck?
I turned toward the commotion and froze. Across the room, Aaron stood stiffly near the entrance with a vaguely exasperated expression, one I saw a handful of times on our date. My mother had one hand on her hip, the other gesturing toward a very well-dressed group of strangers attempting to pull Aaron toward the door.
"Ma'am," the oldest of the group spoke to my mother, holding his hands up in mock surrender. "I assure you, we come in peace."
"You're not answering the question," my mom snapped.
Oh, mom. 
"He’s my ex," the man blurted out without missing a beat. His voice dropped into something heavier, "And I’ve come to win him back."
The entire room went silent. I swore someone actually gasped.
Aaron’s jaw twitched as his eyes found mine across the room. He looked annoyed, amused, and frustrated all at the same time.
"Your...ex?" my mom repeated, voice pitched with disbelief.
The man sighed, bowing his head like he was carrying the weight of an old, familiar pain. 
"Yes. We were once...so much more," He lifted his eyes to the ceiling with a wistful expression, voice trembling just enough to sound authentic. "I gave him my heart, but he belonged to the world. And now, seeing him here..." He placed a hand over his chest. "It's like I’ve been wandering through a desert of loneliness only to find an oasis I no longer deserve."
Someone near me whispered, "That’s so beautiful."
My mom’s jaw slackened. "I...I don’t know what to say."
He continued, "Sometimes, the greatest act of love is letting go." He cast a mournful glance toward Aaron, "Even if it means watching the only man who ever understood me walk away with someone else." 
A sniffle echoed from the corner. I glanced over and saw my cousin Vanessa—the bride—dabbing her eyes with a cocktail napkin.
I nearly fell over at the absurdity of it all.
"And these people?" my mom asked, voice cracking slightly as she gestured to the rest of the group.
The youngest man in the group awkwardly rose his hand, "We're, um..."
“We were in an polyamorous relationship—with Aaron,” a dark-haired woman spoke up. 
A fit man with a shadow of a beard—damn he was hot, too—hid a laugh behind his hand while hiding his face behind the dark-haired woman. 
My mother did not look impressed.
Meanwhile, Aaron stood there like a hostage, shoulders rigid and lips pressed into a thin line. I knew that look—he wore it when I ambushed him on the street—his I am using every ounce of my patience right now face.
I made my way toward the group just as my mom turned back to the older man.
"Listen here, buddy," she snapped, poking him in the chest. "I don’t care how much you still love him. He’s here with my son, and you’re not going to ruin this by dragging him off for some last-ditch romantic gesture."
Rossi gave her a deeply sympathetic look, "I—we just want to beg for another chance, ma'am."
The crowd melted.
Someone whispered, "That’s love."
Another person sobbed openly into their champagne flute.
By the time I reached Aaron's side, the tension had shifted. My mom was still skeptical, but several of my cousins were openly swooning at the spectacle.
I gave the crowd a tense smile as I approached, resting my hand on Aaron's upper arm and leaning in to his ear and whispering, “What the fuck is going on?”
The older man gave me a nod, lowering his voice, "We hate to break up the party, kid, but we need Aaron. Urgent case."
"Right," I said, suddenly more sober. He was needed, I could text him later.
The team ushered Aaron through the door to the sound of faint applause from the wedding guests.
I stood there, shaking my head at what the hell just transpired.
My mother actually wiped her eyes and sighed, "I'm so sorry, honey, I tried to stop them. I didn't realize he had so many partners before you.”
“Mom, those were his coworkers picking him up for an urgent issue.”
"Oh, sweetie," she said, patting my cheek. "You just don’t understand modern relationships. 
Later that night I was sprawled over my couch, my mother having driven me home as I had a few more drinks to make up for Aaron’s absence. My guest room was prepared ahead of time, thankfully. 
I groaned, loosening my belt lazily, still in my suit. I had gotten Mochi from my neighbor, needing my baby to ease the sing of Aaron’s depsrture. She lay across my lap, belly-up and snoring. My mom sat in my recliner, a glass of wine in hand now that she could decompress from the wedding.
“It was such a beautiful day,” she mused. “Until Aaron didn’t come back after that discussion with his exes,” she grumbled.
“Mom…” I groaned into a pillow. “Mom, they’re not his exes, they’re his team at work. They were messing with you.”
“Mmm,” she hummed, not sounding the slightest bit convinced.
The TV hummed in the background, low enough for us to ignore until I heard a familiar voice break through our conversation.
“…we were able to quickly apprehend the suspect and bring an end to these tragic events."
My mom gasped, leaning forward, "Oh, honey! Isn't that Aaron?"
I sat up so fast Mochi nearly flopped off my lap, and sure enough—there he was on the news, standing in front of a sheriff’s station with a microphone in his face. Same pink shirt. Same navy suit. Same faintly irritated expression.
"I told you he was working," I muttered, running a hand down my face. “All of a sudden you love him again,” I rolled my eyes.
"—ultimately, the case was resolved after it was determined that the suspect was, in fact, the sheriff," Aaron said, voice monotone and precise. "He left his own boot prints at three of the crime scenes and, when confronted, confessed almost immediately."
There was an awkward pause as reporters scribbled notes.
"Wait," one asked, "so it...was just the sheriff the whole time?"
"Yes," Aaron said.
"And he...admitted it right away?"
"Yes," Aaron repeated, slower this time. His jaw twitched in annoyance.
"So," the reporter pressed, "you flew in from Quantico...for that?"
The muscle in Aaron’s jaw jumped again, "Yes."
I barked out a laugh.
The camera zoomed out as Aaron stepped away from the microphones. His team followed closely behind, the blonde agent talking with the older agent animatedly. The last shot before the feed was cut off was Aaron rubbing his temples.
I shook my head and stood, scooping Mochi up under one arm, "I'm going to bed."
"Tell Aaron I said ‘hi’ next time you talk to him!"
"Mm-hmm." I carried Mochi toward my bedroom, but halfway there, my phone buzzed in my pocket.
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I smiled, tucking my phone away again and held Mochi tighter. 
I called back down the hallway, “Aaron says ‘hi’.”
“What a sweetheart. I really do like him, honey,” she called back.
“Yeah, me, too, Mom.”
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schrodingers-romy · 9 months ago
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You Don’t Gotta Hold Me Down, Baby (I Know How to Sink) [Shidou Ryusei x Reader]
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Pairing: Shidou Ryusei x GN!Reader Word Count: ~1800 [Ao3 Link]
Summary: Ryusei is used to feeling empty at the end of the day; at least, until he has you.
Warnings: crying, some light depression i think from shidou, kisses, reader and ryusei are both lonely and weird idk what to tell you, no gendered pronouns/terms used for reader, gratuitous petnames, some innuendo but nothing sexual/heated happens
Notes: I read in the character book line where he 'cries at the end of the day when he becomes nothing' and I haven't stopped thinking about it. I sincerely hope it's in character but idk. I love him anyways tho and I had fun writing this <3 Title is a lyric from RELAX AFTER WORK WITH A DRINK by Lilyisthatyou.
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At the end of the day, Shidou Ryusei becomes nothing.
During the day, lit by the radiance of the sun, he was something. He was in control of his own destiny, a daredevil chasing the high of the next explosion. Whether that explosion came from kicking a soccer ball or kicking some slime’s face in was irrelevant; it was the rush of endorphins it gave him that was important. He was in peak form, the predator at the top of the food chain, devouring the opportunities the world had gifted him, glutting himself on whatever adrenaline high presented itself. But it never lasted; the explosive energy he had faded to nothing at the end of the day, pleasure slipping through his fingers like smoke in the wind, escaping him with the escaping daylight. After sunset, he was left empty, void of any sort of vitality; like a combustion engine with no fuel to light, he was left stiff, and cold, and useless. Forgotten.
He didn't even bother trying to stay up much past sunset, most days. Even with the sun’s lingering warmth rising from the earth during the night, it was always too cold for him, without the light shining on him. He was a photosynthetic organism, relying on sunlight to create his own sustenance in the form of his explosions.
Ryusei liked to think that the faster he went to sleep, the faster he would see the sun again.
It even worked, sometimes.
But sometimes it didn't. Sometimes he lay there for hours, too tired to do anything, and too tired to sleep. It was a bone-deep exhaustion, one that made his joints ache dully, and his eyes stay stuck open, as tears dripped freely down from them onto the thin and faded material of his pillowcase. Those nights, he desperately waited for the sun to return, so he could come back to life. So he could go back to seeking some way to make himself feel. And maybe he would be lucky enough to somehow make his mark on the world, so he would no longer fade from it every night like a mirage.
But he hadn’t made a mark on the world yet. He had yet to make something of himself.
So, at night, Shidou Ryusei would cry as he became nothing.
-
You were both a particular brand of lonely.
Something in the both of you had noticed each other; like calling to like. You were too close for people who had known each other for such a short period of time; it would be concerning, if either of you cared. But you didn’t, so you spent your days attached at the hip. Gorging yourselves on the attention of the other, desperate creatures starved for the acknowledgement and understanding that you had only ever found in each other.
It wasn’t an understanding borne of explicit conversation; the two of you had discussed almost everything under the sun and moon, but you both excelled at skirting the razor’s edge of baring your issues fully. Whether it was because neither of you understood your own mind yourself, or because some sort of animal instinct in you just understood each other without having to spill the gore of your worst feelings, it was unclear. It didn’t really matter, anyways. You were two sides of the same corroded coin, two pieces of a defective puzzle that could only ever fit together.
-
It was past midnight, and you were exhausted. The noise from the television was nothing more than the canned background hum to Ryusei's presence. The true focus of the scene was his flickering gaze and the hot press of his thighs against yours. You were sitting so close you could nearly count every single one of his numerous blond lashes. The shadows they cast on his cheeks were hypnotizing to you, and you found yourself leaning into him, with a combination of your own sleepiness and the dizzy, floaty sensation you always felt when you were this close to him casting you off balance. You could not help yourself from leaning further in, until you were falling into him. Your cheek landed pressed onto the warmth of his exposed collarbone, where his oversized shirt collar had slipped down to reveal tanned skin. You let out a heavy sigh, nuzzling into him, as he wrapped his arms around you to pull you ever closer to his heated body.
“Tired, babes?” he asked, the uncharacteristic deep, slow tone to his voice betraying his own sleepiness.  
“Mhmm hmm,” you mumbled. “Too tired to go home. I’m staying here tonight.”
With anyone else, you wouldn’t have been so bold as to invite yourself to stay the night for the first time. But everything was different with Ryusei. You could be as bold as you wanted, take what you wanted, without fear of ridicule or rejection or anger. He would just give you a particular feral grin, when you asserted yourself, that made you feel confident and on top of the world.
It’s only because you’re so close that you felt the slight hitch in his breath. He covered it nearly seamlessly with his usual attitude. “Of course! I’d love to have you spend the night with me, sexy~”
You nipped lightly at his collar bone, chastising. “Just sleeping, Ryu, no innuendo intended.”
“Aww, how can you say that, after putting your teeth on me,” he whined, teasing. “You know that gets me going, sugar…”
“I want you to get going. To sleep,” you retorted. “I’m tiredddd.” You let your voice trail into a childish whine.
“Can’t have that, can we?” Ryusei shifted, sliding one arm underneath your thighs and one behind your back to lift you up into a bridal carry. “Do I have Your Highness’s permission to take you to bed? I promise not to have my wicked way with you there. Knight’s honor.”
“Ah, why would I not trust my most loyal knight? Take me away, good sir.”
Ryusei grinned wide enough to show gums, before carrying you out of the living room with surprising gentleness.
(Though it wasn’t entirely surprising, to you.)
-
The room was dark, aside from the weak, silvered light of the moon and stars that leaked from Ryusei’s uncovered window. It was just bright enough for you to see the faintest details of his face.
He looked softer, hair down, kohl washed away, venomous pink eyes half-lidded; a sort of physical representation of how he bared himself to you. You were compelled to pull him closer to you, until you could bury your face into his product-free hair. You let out a contented hum at feeling the abnormal silkiness of it.
You were so comfortable; you felt like you were melting into the mattress. It had been forever since you had gone to sleep feeling so relaxed (and safe, and not alone); you couldn’t be blamed for nearly drifting off the second you laid down with Ryusei in your arms.
You were almost gone, slipping into dreamland by the pull of the gentle hands of Morpheus, when you felt Ryusei begin to tremble in your arms.
It was like a switch had been flipped, removing sleep from the edges of your mind like the swipe of an eraser on a chalkboard. You were immediately focused on him.
“Ryusei? Are you okay?” you whispered, a sliver of panic slipping into your voice.
You could feel him shaking slightly in your hold, arms wrapped in a vice grip around you, face pressed tightly into your neck, hiding his expression from you. You felt a drip of wetness fall onto your skin and slip down.
He was crying.
“Baby,” you murmured, hugging his lax body even closer to yours, like you could tuck him away into your ribcage, safe and sound. “Ryu, darling, what’s wrong?” You felt off-balance, perhaps for the first time since you had met. Your understanding did not extend to this, not when he had so carefully pirouetted around any true pain he felt when you talked.
He gripped you tighter for a moment, fingers digging into your skin hard enough to leave bruises, before he relaxed his hold. “Nothin’s wrong.” He lifted his head to look at you.
The tear trails on his face were lit up like liquid drips of mercury in the moonlight. But he didn’t look devastated, as you expected; instead, he had the smallest, softest smile you had ever seen him wear. Even in the half-light, his gaze was soaked in so much affection, he looked love-drunk. It rendered you speechless.
“Y’know,” he laughed wetly, “I usually cry, at night. When I become nothing.” He took a deep, shuddering breath.
You lifted one hand to his face, wiping away the fresh flow of tears that leaked from his glittering eyes. Your eyebrows were creased, a pang going through your heart at his words.
But he wasn’t done, pausing only to nuzzle his cheek further into your hand, like a housecat. “Still cryin’, tonight, but I’m not sad. Y’see babes? I’m not sad. I don’t feel like nothing, I feel happy. Happy tears, sweetheart, just cause tonight I’m with you.” He giggled, hiccupping slightly as his laughter caught on the tears still welling up.
You gaped at Ryusei for a moment, before you yanked him into a kiss. It wasn’t the best kiss ever, still wet with his tears, barely more than a firm press of mouths together before you release him.
He grinned at you for a moment, before dropping back down onto you, boneless. “I feel drunk. Like I’m high. Crossfaded. On you, babe!~” he blabbered, sing-song. “It’s not an explosion, it’s a bonfire inside of me! Shit, this might be better than playing. Or fighting. I might even be a little horny right now, I can’t tell.”
“God, you’re so weird, Ryu.” You punctuated your statement with a firm kiss to his forehead, making an exaggerated ‘mwah’ sound that drew a giggle from the man on top of you. “I love you. I’m gonna be with you forever. I’ll move in, and we’ll sleep together every night, you’ll never feel like nothing again.”
“Maybe I AM horny…horny off of love…emotionally horny?” he rambled. “Fuck, I don’t know, babe, but I love you too, and I’m never gonna let your pretty ass go now, y’hear?”
“Perfect. We’ll become one organism. Symbiosis. Like lichen,” you breathed.
Ryusei let out a lovesick sigh. “Love it when you talk sexy to me.”
You felt one of his hands drift down to squeeze one of your ass cheeks.
You let out an exasperated, but fond sigh. “Ryusei. Go to sleep.”
“Okay honey~” he said, letting out a little giggle into your collarbone.
(And for the first time in years, neither of you fell asleep feeling empty, or lonely; and you would wake up to find joy in the sunrise together.)
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