#he's not overly emotional it's just that imagine if he's currently Going Through It and just

[bruhstation]

henry btw. now that you have me by the throat

FOR REAL THIS IS LITERALLY HIM!!!!!! driven to tears by the little things in life.... reminds me of this one

[nothingenoughao3]

Why we wanna transition to Mad Scientist (or, revulsion and queerness in horror)

(Hi, @ash-eats-film! This is the thing I mentioned!)

Horror has a few baseline emotions it tries to inflict on the audience. This has been written about for decades, most famously by Stephen King, but the baseline elements most writers agree on are as follows.

Dread: Anxiety over what is about to happen

Terror: The fear of what is occurring right this second

Revulsion: Being forced to interact directly with what's happening right now

Black comedy: Being tricked into laughing at either the terror or the revulsion

Horror: The trauma response to what just happened

A great example of this can be seen in The Evil Dead II (YT link that doesn't include the full context, but does have the, uh, money shot). There's the dread of realizing there's something in the root cellar; the terror of when the Deadite pops up in the trapdoor; the combined revulsion and black comedy of Ash jumping on the Deadite's skull/the door, popping out its eyeball which shoots into Bobby Joe's mouth, and then the horror of what just went down rolling over Ash and his current companions.

Often, revulsion and black comedy go hand in hand. That's because they're tension relievers. The revolting thing becomes ridiculous, and you laugh at how ridiculous it is. This lets you settle down in the midst of the gore and death, just slightly, just enough to get through it... so the horror can fully set in for you, too, once it's over.

You also, often, question your own stability if you laugh in the middle of a gross-out horror scene: "Am I sick? Is there something wrong with me for laughing at X?" This is even worse if the villain starts laughing--now you're questioning whether you're IDing with the monster. Are you okay? Is something wrong with you?

Revulsion is often framed as the slutty member of the good, proper, morally-upright brigade of horror. We have a name for folks who seek out gross-out horror--they're gore-hounds, a term that is virtually always pejorative when applied to other people. We call certain types of horror "torture porn" or "gore porn", as though it is inherently sleazy and sexual to rely on this specific emotional reaction. (Note that we don't have "black comedy-porn", or "dread hounds", even though a dread hound sounds really fucking cool.)

Not to go off on a huge tangent, but I think the issue with media that overly relies on revulsion is that it's unbalanced, not that it's bad. A movie that's nothing but dread never has any emotional payoff. A movie that's nothing but terror never lets the audience relax back into their seats and, paradoxically, will become boring (imagine two hours of jumpscares).

So forth and so on: all aspects of horror rely on each other to survive. That includes scenes that make you go "Awww, sick" while nervously cackling.

Here's the thing: in previous generations, revulsion was similarly understood to be an essential part of horror, but what led to a revolted reaction was very different.

Lovecraft (boo this man! BOOOOO) understood the power of revulsion, which was the source of a lot of his strangest and most vivid descriptions. It was also the source of some of his most bigoted ideas working into his stories. The undercurrent of "non-WASPs are evil because they are repulsive" is as pervasive in his work as "the universe is incomprehensibly vast". You kind of can't get around that.

But there's another thing Lovecraft did to generate revulsion. He wrote a number of stories where an unhealthy focus on corpses, graveyards, graverobbing, and the like is, indirectly or directly, associated with sexual perversion. 

How many, you may ask? Off the top of my head, there's "The Loved Dead", "In the Vault", "The Disinterment", "Pickman's Model", The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath, "The Hound" and "Herbert West: Re-Animator". All of these tales share certain themes, which don't repeat beat-for-beat in each tale but do overlap:

Male character becomes obsessed with dead bodies--whether that's stealing them, having sex with them, desecrating them, or resurrecting them.

He is comfortable around death and the dead to a degree that is unusual, sometimes explicitly stating that he prefers the smells/sights of death to those of life.

Terms like "fiendish", "hellish", "abnormal" and "perverse" are used to describe him; his gaze towards dead bodies or to experiments may be framed as "leering" or "speculative".

He is frequently a twink; often described as being frail, if not noticeably beautiful; he may recall being mocked for being "bookish" or "weak" as a child.

He is superficially charming in a way that gets him by in polite society, but not long-term nor in-depth.

He often ensnares an otherwise "normal" man to share his obsessions, effectively recruiting him as an assistant... until the "normal" guy realizes he's about to go on the chopping block (or, in at least one story, already was on the chopping block).

Their crimes involve a lot of sneaking around late at night, locked doors, whispering so they don't get caught (or they'll be killed), secretiveness, glee at getting away with it, and frequently, sharing the same living space.

The Unrepentant Evil Dude is often killed at the end of his tale in a way that implies vigilante/mob justice is at hand. 

The other may be allowed to live if he's very sorry and frames the whole story as being the fault of the other guy, or he may die too while affirming his horrible demise as just, even if it terrifies him.

(One could make an argument that Wilbur Whateley fits into some of these tropes. It's me I'm one)

If this all sounds very gay, Lovecraft probably would have agreed. He had as dim a view of homosexuality as he did on most other things that were Outside The Norm. In other words, we were supposed to see Richard Upton Pickman with his ghouls and think, "Ah, yes, this is a metaphor for queerness", only we were supposed to be revolted by that revelation.

This same attempt at revulsion can be easily read into Victor Frankenstein, and probably more Mad Scientists than I can name offhand (but feel free to in reblogs). Frankenstein's "crimes against nature" were connected to dead bodies as well, and likewise involved a lot of sneaking around, locked doors, and worry about what would happen were he caught with this naked man-thing he's keeping in his dorm. His crime, as with his parody character Herbert West, is creating life outside the bounds of heterosexual cisgender sex. This was meant to revolt readers' sensibilities as much as the whole cutting-up-corpses-and-stitching-them-back-together thing would.

This is why, if we're being honest, "Re-Animator" and "Bride of Re-Animator" are not necessarily gay… they're homophobic. This might be controversial, but stick with me.

I feel like Gordon and Yuzna were tapping into that old-fashioned Revulsion Handbook, including from the source material, which thematically linked Herbert West with queerness. (I'm using "queer" a lot here, but I would personally include trans-friendly readings under that rubric; I'm using "queer" in the analytical sense and not solely in the identity sense.) This means that, ironically, a lot of what we could point to as queer subtext is actually homophobic text.

This is reinforced by the novelization of the first film, written by a homophobe who got Trumpist brainworms later in life. He wanted to make West repulsive to the reader, and therefore, he tried to make West more gay. And IT WORKED. 

To be clear, I'm not accusing anybody, other than the novelist, of being a homophobe. There's a difference between possessing internalized bigoted beliefs which express themselves in writing, versus utilizing tropes originating in bigotry because That's What's Done Around Here. (I can understand why others might not perceive a meaningful difference.) Like the Cuzco lizards, this queerness-as-villainy is definitely a stupid thing ported in from the source material.

I do think that this is why everybody but Our Queen Barbara Crampton seems embarrassed or nonplussed by all the transfags pestering them about fellatio tapes. It's because they don't get why this thing appeals so much to us. It shouldn't. If anything, they should be canceled for having yet another queer-coded villain, along with a number of other plot choices of questionable taste (I'm looking at you, The Head Scene, and I don't like what I see).

Only, uh, it didn't work out that way long-term, did it?

I thank Cronenberg and venereal horror for this, in part. Brutally queer despite not being explicitly gay, venereal horror is what happens when the characters should be revolted, but aren't. 

This kind of thing is horrifying for crossing the line twice: first by being disgusting, then by having characters respond as though it is exciting, or sexually stimulating, or if nothing else, normal. They are perverse. They leer at the dead and the subjects of their experiments. And the disgusting monsters at the center of these narratives are celebrated. Their twisted sexualities are explored with the same brave frankness other filmmakers give to milquetoast cishet missionary nonsense. Their political views are given life and air, and usually, they're right. Their deaths, if they come at all, are framed as tragedies brought on by society's sick rejection of the flesh their brave experimentation.

Cronenberg's the dude who unironically thinks that Shivers (trigger warning for literally everything) has a happy ending. My man David's got subscriptions where others have issues.

Venereal horror has given us a new metaframework for looking at the repulsive, the monstrous, and the problematic and responding to it… differently.

Now here's another thing: Lovecraft likewise provided a structure for embracing the grotesque and the queer.

Pickman, the Decadent artist, paints photorealistic, enormous portraits of ghouls. Literal flesh-eaters. He is fascinated by them, comfortable with them. "Model" heavily implies that Pickman is a ghoul changeling--switched at birth with a human child. This leans into Lovecraft's ideas about heritability being a major source of horror, of course, and seems run of the mill until you get to The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath.

In there, Pickman appears again, but this time as a ghoul. He has cast off his human social shackles and joined the beings he loves, beings who understand him and support him. Kadath is notable in that the ghouls are actually... like... reliable, loyal, and morally good? Carter's opinion pretty much is, "They do eat human corpses and they smell awful, but they're all very nice and want to help me on my quest, so maybe they're not so bad (if not as good as the cat army)".

This feels like Lovecraft acknowledging that his entire approach of linking queerness, death, and revulsion is fundamentally flawed. Once you become familiar with the repulsive, it becomes not-really-that-repulsive-at-all. You can find beauty in it, and amusement, and love. Pickman embracing his ghoulish nature isn't all that different from Seth Brundle's overall lack of revulsion at his body's transformation. And it's not that different from what a lot of transmasculine folks go through, either.

It's not that transmascs, trans men, and/or transfags don't see what West does as crimes against nature. It's that we're all very fucking tired of being accused of crimes against nature. We're tired of not being able to look at socmed without finding accusations that we're disgusting perverts who sneak around behind closed doors to corrupt innocent, promising people to be our lackeys and partners in crime.

Hell, I refer to my wife as "my partner in crime" not because it's a cute way of acknowledging how well and how much we work together both in life and creativity. It's also because we could have been arrested for our relationship when we got together.

We were illegal.

There was a lot of sneaking around and whispering and trying not to get caught and "what if they call the cops on us if we're clocked". Can I tell my friends about this? Will they reject me or rat me out? Where am I safe? Nowhere. Best to lock the door and then check it again to be sure. Best to be very quiet.

Best to act like a graverobber trying to get their grisly wares back home before good, decent, Christian folk see them.

So when I hear "Blasphemy? Before what God?!", I read it as (whether he's ace or aro, gay or achillean, trans man or transmasc or genderfucked) a queer slogan of defiance, instead of a defense of graverobbing, corpse desecration, and non-consensual resurrection.

We're told we and our bodies are repulsive, so being told that Herbert is also repulsive makes him more relatable. Instead of wondering what the hell's wrong with him for shooting up reagent, we all theorize that it's actually T or has similar effects--because we're all told that T is a toxin that will horribly change and disfigure our bodies. He dresses in a three-piece suit for school, and instead of reading him as a stiff and overly-formal little freak, we assume he's layering up because he hasn't found a hoodie he likes yet. 

He cackles at his horrific creations, and instead of saying "What a fucking freak (anguished)", we say "What a fucking freak (affectionate)" and laugh along with him. Who among us hasn't taken apart our Barbies and tried to combine their parts with the Kens? What is a doll, or a human, but a collection of parts to be rearranged? Haven't we also been told we're freaks for rearranging our own parts?

We've already been told by society at large that we are Herbert West. We're just embracing it, in the proud tradition of venereal horror fans who are not revolted when they ought to be, and I think that's delightful.

[saschax]

ghost headcannons.

TRIGGER WARNINGS: intense negative emotions (experiences strong feelingsof anger, resentment, anxiety, and stress), grudge holding (hold onto negative feelings), emotional surpression, isolation and touch deprivation (isolated and unaccustomed to phsyical contact, which he yearns for), trauma-related fear, sexual anxiety, mental distress (experiences a lot of mental distress and anxiety, which is exacerbated during intimate situations.) nsfw (sexual content)

safe for work.

ghost is an individual who is deeply angered, seeking vengeance, and filled with intense resentment.

contrary to the popular belief that ghost is understanding, compassionate, or forgiving, i personally perceive him as stern, and he has a tendency to hold onto grudges.

although he might seem “peaceful” on the surface, there’s a storm brewing within him, as he suppresses his anger. this is a detrimental habit of his. in general, his internal emotional state is typically dominated by anxiety, stress, hatred, and fury.

ghost is isolated…

in my opinion. he is deprived of physical contact, but it doesn’t help when he recoils or twitches every time someone accidentally brushes against him. ghost struggles to communicate that he doesn’t dislike the touch, he’s just not accustomed to it (and in fact, he yearns for it more than anything), but he keeps this to himself.

building on the previous point, he is fearful of intimate gestures.

such as hand-holding, close proximity (he doesn’t mind this if it occurs during missions, as long as it’s necessary. e.g., door breaching), and so forth. this fear stems from his traumatic experiences with such gestures…

i believe this is referred to as haphephobia?

ghost has a leaner physique.

in my view. he is strong, but not overly muscular. he’s not leaner than soap or any other guys, though, he’s still a bit more muscular than them.

his build aligns with the original ghost’s, just with a bit more muscle to support the current one.

ghost falls ill frequently.

since ghost doesn’t really take good care of himself, such as getting adequate sleep or consuming enough food/drinks, he tends to fall sick easily.

and he never discloses this to anyone and continues to carry out his missions.

ghost experiences nightmares during his sleep.

and because his dreams are so vivid, he temporarily forgets a person (like soap, if he is dreaming about soap. e.g., soap gets brutally attacked) for a while when he wakes up.

his brain temporarily suppresses certain memories of his to shield him from stress, but they always resurface later…

not safe for work.

ghost is timid, hesitant.

it’s already a small wonder if you somehow manage to have him above you, he’s not accustomed to being this exposed and he feels like he’s on the verge of being sick.

he’s just… unfamiliar with this, trembling the entire time.

this is the real him, a guy with full of anxiety, troubles. a guy who is told to "hide your fear", and don't show weaknesses. his whole fucking walls are falling down because of alot of things are going through his head.

he tends to pause frequently.

don’t worry if he pauses his thrusts, it’s just him reflecting on… certain matters.

you’ll need to gently draw him out of his thoughts if you want him to continue, his eyes fixated on the pillow, lost in thought, is making you worried.

P.S i always imagined ghost as person with mental problems, considering his backstory.

please let me know if this is not canon! i am german so i dont really know the plot very well, im still learning.

(i dont know english pronouncations, just how to type the words)

ill be posting a "dominant and needy" john price fanfiction tomorrow, unknown time. its nsfw.

[fyodior]

〖 IRRESISTIBLE 〗

PAIRING ➼ fyodor x afab reader

NOTES ➼ this is just pure self-indulgent fantasy. imagine Irresistible by one direction is playing in the background. minors DNI! 18+ only

CW ➼ reader is pregnant and in labor, breeding kink, pregnancy kink, semi-public sex if you squint, creampie

WC ➼ 2.2k

DISCLAIMER ➼ this is not meant to be medically accurate, and i do not recommend doing anything written here. it is FICTION so. enjoy :)

“Thank god you’re back,” you groaned as your lover entered the hospital room, arms full of different goodies. He set down the food, change of clothes, and laptop onto the tray table before walking over to you. You were currently standing, bent over and leaning on the side of the hospital bed, one hand holding the underside of your incredibly swollen belly while the other had the white bedsheets in a death grip.

You weren’t able to get an epidural yet, so you were stuck enduring the god-awful contractions until you were dilated enough. Your lover, Fyodor, had been by your side this whole time but left briefly to obtain food and other things you needed from home. With your permission to do so, of course. The 45 minutes he was gone felt like 10 hours.

He placed a small hand on your back but you flinched, your skin overly sensitive at the moment.

“How are you feeling?” he asked, sound very concerned. At the exact same time, a deep contraction rippled through your body and you gripped the sheets fiercely, moaning in pain.

“Why is that even a fucking question?” you hissed, out of breath. You didn’t intend to be mean, you were just incredibly overwhelmed and your emotions had gotten the better of you. Luckily, Fyodor was always incredibly patient with you and your random emotional outbursts, always doing his best to comfort you instead of starting a fight. You honestly couldn’t believe how lucky you had gotten to have such an amazing, compassionate lover like Fyodor.

“You’re right,” he said, chuckling softly to try and lift the mood.

He moved closer to you and draped his tall, lanky frame over your back, using both hands to hold the underside of your belly, relieving some of the uncomfortable weight. You moaned at the slight relief, and leaned back into him.

“Baby dropped and is pulling me down with her.”

Fyodor smiled silently to himself before kissing the top of your head affectionately.

“Ya know,” he started, leaning in close. “Obviously I’ve always thought you were gorgeous and sexy, but god are you fucking irresistible pregnant.” You moaned loudly, the unexpected words filling your already clouded brain.

“Love how round and swollen your belly is, so full of my baby. Watching your bump grow has been such a privilege, but such a turn on. The way your pants slowly stopped fitting and your shirts couldn’t stretch over your bump constantly made me horny. Carrying my baby. Our baby. The one we made together, filling you up completely.”

“Are you- are you serious?” you asked, hand instinctively coming to rest on the top of your bump.

“Dead serious. But never wanted to make you feel weird,” he said, resting his chin on your head.

You opened your mouth to respond but instead jerked in pain in Fyodor’s grip as you were hit with yet another contraction. It knocked the breath out of you, and Fyodor had to hold you tight to his chest to keep your legs from giving out. As soon as it was over and you could breathe again, Fyodor convinced you it was probably best to stay laying down at this point. You were stubborn and hated admitting defeat, but let him help you lay down in the hospital bed.

You looked down to see wet stains on the chest of your gown and realized you had released some milk for an unknown reason. You sighed as you imagined this was going to become a very common occurrence. While you hadn’t known the extent to which Fyodor found your pregnant self sexy, you had very well known how obsessed he was with your breasts that had almost tripled in size since you became pregnant. They swelled just as your stomach did, and while Fyodor was typically an ass guy, he was over the moon with how supple and sensitive they had become. He absolutely loved to touch and hold them, and you honestly didn’t mind the massages and weight relief. He had yet to tell you about his lactation kink though.

Suddenly the doctor walked into the room, put on surgical gloves and settled down on a rolling stool at the foot of your bed.

“Here to check how dilate you are, hon!” she said far too cheerfully, and you did your best not to give her a death glare. After uncomfortably shoving two gloved fingers inside you to gauge how far along you were, the number she gave you made you want to punch her in the face.

“Two centimeters? Are you fucking kidding? I’ve been in pain for hours,” you complained. If it weren’t for Fyodor moving closer to you to hold your hand and kiss your forehead, you probably would’ve burst into tears.

The doctor looked apologetic, and placed a hand on your leg. “Some people just take longer than others to dilate. All we can do is wait, hon. I’m sorry. If it’s really taking too long, we can induce labor, but it’s far too early for that.”

And just like that, she was out of the room just as fast as she came in. Fyodor sat down on the side of your bed, one hand still intertwined with yours, the other brushing the hair out of your eyes.

“Two fucking centimeters,” you growled, wanting to scream. You could see the pain on Fyodor’s face, knowing this had almost as much of an emotional toll on him too.

“I know, darling, I’m so sorry,” he said sweetly, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead. “You’ll get there eventually, and all will be good.”

“Easy for you to say,” you grumbled, attempting to cross your arms over your chest but failing due to the baby still inside you getting in the way. He just squeezed your hand tighter and pet your hair.

Suddenly, an idea popped into your head. A little bit insane, but you weren’t at your most rational anyway.

“Hey, babe.”

“Yes, my love,” Fyodor responded, voice as sweet and tender as always.

“I’ve heard from some people that there’s something you can do to make your cervix dilate faster.”

His eyes narrowed and eyebrows furrowed. “And what is that?”

“Well…” you trailed off, suddenly regretting the decision.

“Well, what? You can tell me.”

“Sex.”

“What?” he choked on the word.

“Yeah. Apparently sex during labor can induce dilation and speed up the process, and it’s perfectly safe.”

He still just stared at you wordlessly, eyes wide.

“S-, So, you want me to have sex with you? Right now?”

You looked at Fyodor with sweet eyes and a small pout, a look you knew was his kryptonite.

“Would you, please? Would you fuck me?”

You heard his breath catch and knew there was no way he was saying no now. Not here, not like this.

Suddenly, his expression changed. His eyes darkened and a small smirk spread across his face.

“Of course, my darling. Whatever you wish.”

Wasting no time, Fyodor quickly shut the window blinds and shoved a chair under the door handle. You could see the outline of his growing erection through his pants and smiled to yourself.

Then he was joining you on the hospital bed, hovering over your frame. You looked at him with innocent eyes, though you were anything but. He lifted up your hospital gown to just above your tits, putting all of you fully on display. He stared at you hungrily. On his knees and bent over, he began kissing up your pregnant belly, and being reminded of you carrying, and soon birthing, his child made his cock harden all the way. He ran his fingers lightly over your skin, following the lines of the stretch marks he found so beautiful. You were so beautiful. He couldn’t stop, loved your bump so much, kept pressing kisses and small touches all over.

You sat up a bit – as much as you could, anyway – to look at Fyodor.

“Fedya, love, can we do this quick?” He looked up at you as if he was just snapped out of a trance.

“Yes, of course. Gladly.”

With Fyodor’s help, you were able to position your legs in a way that would grant him access to your pussy, which proved to be difficult considering the size of your belly. He pulled off his pants and underwear and moved to kiss you languidly. His hand rested softly on the back of your head, and for a moment this felt like normal, intimate sex. But any sex with Fedya was beautiful.

His fingers wandered to your pussy and pushed inside, feeling how sopping wet you were and groaning. Definitely just a part of childbirth, but sexy nonetheless.

“You ready, darling?” he asked, leaning away from the kiss to position himself.

“So ready.” He smirked.

He lined his already aching cock up with your swollen pussy, thrusting and gliding in with beautiful ease. The moan of pleasure you let out was almost pornographic, and you slapped a hand over your mouth. You weren’t that worried though, you definitely were not the only one on that floor screaming.

Fyodor was the same, biting back a deep groan as your pussy wrapped around him like it never had before. Swollen due to hormones but stretched to allow for a baby to move through, your gaping hole squeezed his cock beautifully.

With your nod of approval, he began to move, thrusting in and out of you with a slowly increasing speed. He wasn’t able to lean over your belly to kiss you or your neck, so he settled for massaging your sensitive breasts. They were so sensitive at the moment, and the massage felt heavenly.

Soon he was fucking into you at full force, shaking the hospital bed with his thrusts. You were moaning and whining loudly, had given up on keeping quiet long ago. Fyodor himself was grunting and groaning too, overwhelmed by the feeling.

“Feel so fucking good around my cock, darling. So tight and dripping fucking wet for me, and for our baby.”

All you could do was whine in response, both hands gripping the bedrails with tightly. There was something about this situation that amplified your pleasure ten times over, and you were overwhelmed with the pleasure filling your body with each thrust.

“Filling my pussy up all the way with your cock.” He groaned at your words.

At one point you had to take a break as a sudden contraction hit you, and you squeezed Fyodor’s hands tightly as you rode it out. As soon as it was over, he was right back inside you again.

He fucked you hard and he fucked you good, helping you keep your legs open by holding them under the knees. You chanted his name like a spell, and tears dripped out of your eyes as a physical response to the overwhelming pleasure.

Both his hands came to rest once again on your belly, placing your legs over his thighs for support instead. He couldn’t stop staring at it, couldn’t stop staring at you. SO round, so big, so full. Full of him. You had his baby in your womb and his cock in your pussy – you couldn’t be fuller. As he continued fucking you, his mind replayed some of his favorite memories of you pregnant: the time on Halloween where you painted a pumpkin on your round belly, the day where you cried because you were too big to fit in Fyodor’s T-shirts anymore, the way you teared up when you were finally far enough along to see a bump. Pregnancy hadn’t been perfectly easy for you, but it was a beautiful process that Fyodor cherished.

He was snapped out of his trance by your whimpers.

“Feels so, so good Fedya, please, harder.”

He was never one to deny you anything. He thrusted into you deep and hard, both of you moaning with heightened pleasure.

“Gonna cum right inside you, darling, fill you up with another baby,” he growled.

“Oh god, please,” you whined.

And soon Fyodor was spilling all his cum inside you, fucking you slowly through it. He pulled out quickly and redressed before unblocking the door, slightly frantic. More than absolutely anything, he wanted to lay in bed with you and tell you how beautiful you are and how good you were for him, but a nurse or doctor was bound to come by at any second now. He cleaned you up with a towel, making sure there were no visible remnants of his cum left in or around you. Not super sexy, but definitely necessary.

And sure enough, the doctor had returned not long after, and her eyes widened as she checked your cervix.

“7 centimeters…” she said, baffled. “How did you dilate so much in less than an hour?”

You kept your face emotionless but made eye contact with Fyodor, who was on the verge of cackling.

“She’s just ready to come out, I guess,” you said, feigning the sweetest, most innocent smile you could.

At least it worked.

[pseudo-hero]

A Hopefully Quick Compare/Contrast of Lex and Bruce; Clark and Lex; Bruce and Joker (Et. al.)

"Batman is basically Luthor but good."

"Luthor is basically Batman but bad."

No and no.

I think it's high time that fandoms (DC's in this case) finally start to put an end to overly simplistic—if not downright false—takes and conclusions like this.

Like, I don't mean to sound wrongfully condescending (because I know Lex and Bruce definitely have at least a few traits in common, on average), but I don't understand how anyone who has actually tried to dig at the cores of these two characters (and their respective hero/villain) could make statements like these and then just call it a day.

Again, nooo.

Lex Luthor, if he "became good" (ignoring the emotional journey he's currently going through right now in recent Superman comics) would not be Batman. He'd be Superman!

You want to know why? It's because Lex, arguably since at least his inception in the Superman comics and Action Comics, has not been written to be the "dark mirror"/shadow of Batman, but of Superman.

Almost everything that makes Clark so amazingly gifted and inspiring, Lex has also—but in a twisted or far less appealing way.

Likewise, a "bad/evil Superman" (if written well and not like just another murder-happy blatant tyrant) would be Luthor!

Imagine a Superman that, after self-actualizing, chooses to selfishly mold the world to his image without care for the opinions of the people, but with the same hopeful, altruistic mindset and aspirational worldview that we're used to. In that sense, he'd be less wantonly cruel and preoccupied with spreading fear everywhere he went and more-so misguidedly paternalistic and smothering. So similar to his usual self, but far worse. More like....(a tough-on-crime) Lex Luthor.

I'd argue that Superman: Red Son illustrates an amazing example of this within its pages. I won't say that it's "perfect" (I don't do that with anything, tbh.) but seeing USSR-Superman and America-Lex Luthor be true equals on the mental plane and somewhat physical and even moral, too (but with differing worldviews), is somehow very refreshing and satisfying to see. Highly recommend reading it, even if only out of curiosity.

Now as for Batman? Based on my understanding of him, his shadow self is most likely the obvious choice of the Joker, or may even be Bane or Two-Face. Bruce has a lot of issues, but he (mostly, usually) has not reached the depths of depravity that these three have, especially the Joker. He could, though. That being said, could and would they be Batman if things had been different for any of them? I believe so. Correct me if I'm wrong but didn't they come out with just such a Batman-Joker graphic novel a year or two ago?

However, I don't think any of these Batman villains could ever have been Superman. But Kal-El's pretty hard to match anyway. Just ask Lex.

[lostindarkclouds]

🩸Alastor x Reader Fanfiction 🩸

[Part2]

If you haven't read Part 1, you can find it on my account.

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.

Today should have been a normal day when Alastor went to visit his dear friend.

Obviously Alastor has been observing you for a few days. (She's not overly attracted to you yet. She goes about her life normally. The radio station, Rosie's shop, and hazbin Hotel are his most frequent destinations.)

He is currently sitting on a wooden chair. His wand is against the wall. He is holding his coffee and watching the whole mess.

Rosie carefully shuffles the outfits and asks you to try on the outfits she's sewn.You are very satisfied with Rosie. He's a good boss. She does her job with great care and pays her salary on time.You like working here, but this guy...

You are so bothered by him.

The man is always smiling, his every move is full of grace. His gait, tone of voice, and looks always carry meaning and are flawless. He's a little arrogant... No, he's very arrogant. He speaks kindly, but he can be harsh whenever he wants, you know that.You've never had a long conversation with him, but you seem to know him.

It must be because you're both observing each other...Bright red eyes meet bright blue eyes. It's all just a glance.

This man is giving goosebumps.

Rosie hands a black outfit and quickly pushes you into the booths.

After you enter the cabin, Alastor looks at Rosie for the first time for a long time. Rosie approaches Alastor with an ear-to-ear grin.

"I see you more often these days. Not that I'm complaining. It's good to see you, Alastor."

"Oh what can I say Rosie! I love seeing good company!"

Alastor dramatically puts his hand on his forehead.

Rosie looks at Alastor with expressive eyes.Rosie is a smart woman and she knows what's going on.He knew from the first moment that Alastor was interested in this man.Rosie and Alastor have been friends for a long time. This indicates that they have been observing each other for a long time.(Alastor and Rosie's friendship is different from the normal friendship we know. They had no emotional exchanges. Sometimes they shared memories of better times.But neither of them know much about each other.I mean, because their mindsets match, friends.)

When you entered the cabin, you didn't have much thought about the outfit. As you slowly started to wear the outfit, you realized what kind of outfit it was.

First of all, it was like a long dress. It had a large neckline and was made of black lace. Its design was like a frilly shirt.Rosie always likes to sew weird clothes.You like his clothes too.After all, they are of good quality and fit the demon in many different bodies.But this time the outfit was a little different from the ones she had tried before. That's a little sexy.

(basically the dress is a see-through black lace dress resembling a nightgown.)

"Uhm Miss Rosie?" You called out to Rosie as you slowly opened the cabin door.

Rosie quickly opened the cabin door and grabbed your arm and led you outside.

"Oh dear you are an Angel! This beauty! I can't imagine this outfit would look good on anyone but you!"

Rosie quickly turned around. "What do you think, Alastor?"

While Rosie looks at Alastor, you look at Alastor curiously through the mirror's reflection. Alastor is leaning slightly forward, holding his wand in his hand. (Where's the coffee cup?🙄)

"The clothes you sew have always been number one in the Pride Ring, Rosie!"

Alastor looks at you with a strange look. Eye color appears to be darker. His eyes still glow with a red light. His voice is deep.

"I must admit that with a beautiful model her outfits are more striking."

The wand hits the ground rhythmically and the man suddenly stands up.

You feel cold.

The man says goodbye to Rosie and you and then leaves.

Rosie sighs...

This guy is giving Rosie a lot of trouble and scaring our Y/N. 🤧

Part 3 is coming soon.

[masterjedilenawrites]

How would you imagine the delta boys to react or what they would do when they get back after a rough mission??

Aww this image of battered, downcast Deltas made me so sad... 😢 I just want to protect and love them, your honor.

Boss: Holds himself together for a bit. There's plenty of debriefings and paperwork to get through once they're back, and it won't do for him to be emotional during any of it. He's also hyper-sensitive to the feelings of his squad and he doesn't want to feed into their misery with his own. He won't be overly positive, but he'll maybe try a small pep talk or some comforting shoulder pats as they separate to cope in their own ways. The first time Boss is alone is when he hits the showers, and that's when he'll finally acknowledge his own feelings. He'll let himself take a longer shower than normal, indulging in the hot water hitting his skin while he stands there, motionless and melancholy. There may even be a few frustrated tears that get swept away with the water.

Fixer: Is such a grumpy boy. He doesn't like missions that don't end well, that don't go according to plan. He will be analyzing every detail from the mission, mulling it over and over in his head to figure out what went wrong, and venting about it to anyone who will listen. He never puts names to his feelings, let alone give himself the time or space to properly deal with them. His anger comes out in his speech, clipped and annoyed. His fear becomes pools of sweat along his hairline. His guilt manifests into tinkering and planning, trying to find improvements in both technology and strategy so the difficulties they faced today don't persist into the future. His name is Fixer for a reason; he will not rest until he finds a way to fix whatever broke on this mission.

Scorch: Is simply tuckered out. He will be uncharacteristically quiet as he shuffles his feet out of the ship and toward home base. The playful glint usually found in his eyes has been dimmed as he fights off his exhaustion. He sits numbly through the debriefs and for once doesn't have any quippy retorts when told what to do. As soon as he is able, he collapses onto any decently comfy surface and sleeps for a good, long while. He really can't process such devastating emotions, not when they're so fresh, so intense. He can't fully sleep them off, but the nap diminishes their sting, and allows him to get some of his spunk back, too. When he wakes, he'll be back to his usual self, but will have random moments of melancholy as he slowly processes the events of the mission.

Sev: On the outside, he doesn't seem much different, simply dark and broody as always. But on the inside, he's hurting. Bad. Nothing gets him down quite like a failed mission. He takes full responsibility, even for the things outside of his control. He can't help it. If fighting is the one thing he was made for, how could he brush off failure? Whether or not these feelings come to the surface depends on who he's around. If Fixer is pacing about and venting, then Sev will likely blow up in anger. If Scorch crashes on the bunk next to him, Sev will sit in contemplative silence for as long as his brother sleeps. And a shoulder pat from Boss? However quick or innocent, that's what impacts Sev the most. He'll disappear and let himself cry over the comforting gesture.

Everything Tag: @damerondala, @dangerousstrawberrypie, @fallingforthem, @harleyevanstan, @imabeautifulbutterfly, @justanothersadperson93, @misogirl828, @itsagrimm, @error6gendernotfound, @theroguesully, @clonesimp, @techie-bear

+Delta Squad Tag: @marvel-starwars-nerd, @hanbetired, @lackofhonor, @theclonesdeservebetter, @salaminus, @katzs-current-obsession, @rebel-finn, @the-mom-friend-dot-com, @pickle-rick-y, @flowered-bicycles, @lucyysthings, @severalseashellsbytheseashore, @moon-wrecked

(Join my tag list here)

[bengiyo]

“Eternal Yesterday” and the Need for Sad Boy Hours

I have more things to say about where queer narratives about unpleasant aspects of growing up and our pasts fit into our current media landscape. For now, I want to talk about why I love Eternal Yesterday even though it kills a queer in the first episode and then trots his corpse around for seven more episodes.

I’ve enjoyed seeing the commentary from @gillianthecat, @squeakygeeky and @waitmyturtles (and others. I’m so sorry if I forgot you.)

To get a sense of where I’m coming from, I’m going to transcribe the first voice note I sent immediately after the show ending (with some minor redactions to maintain the anonymity of others):

“Hello, friends. I think Eternal Yesterday is going to be part of the list of BLs from this year that I will be forever talking about. I decided to rate it a 10, but it isn’t a 10 in the triumphant sense, because it’s a show about grief. One of them is dead, and the story is about continuing to live your life even if the love of your life is not there. And, I am deeply saddened by what we’re left with this show, but no BL has really forced me to reckon with some of the grief of my adolescence and losing someone I cared about; and losing other friendships along the way, too. Like, I lost a boy I loved to transphobia, and I think, honestly, that that’s okay. 

“I think a lot of people are going to rate this show poorly for a lot of different reasons. They’re going to rate it poorly for its sad themes. They’re going to rate it poorly because they didn’t use magic to revive Koichi at the end. They’re going to rate it poorly because it was Japanese in terms of how they handled the kissing, though I think it was adequate for this show: particularly for Japan. But I loved this. 

“I loved this not in the way that feels like a warm blanket or makes you feel all happy and gay about yourself. I loved this...in the way someone sitting with you quietly after a funeral in your house, when you’ve made all the food and they’ve put everything away, and you’re just sitting there and you’re weeping. You don’t necessarily want to be held, but they wait there and let you do what you need to do. I think there’s beauty in that.

“I think that queer cinema gets a bad rep sometimes for how sad some of it can be, but some of us are sad. Some of us suffered. Some of us did not have a great time being gay; and even if we grew up and loved things, some of us have been through a lot of pain. [My best friend] has buried far more people than you can even fathom to AIDS, and I think that we can’t just have one or the other. We can just have sad shows; we just can’t have overly fluffed out shows. 

“I think it’s good for the genre to give people the emotional space to explore grief and meditate on it and process how they’re feeling. And I think it’s okay if that’s not for everyone, and I think that’s maybe going to be one of the things I talk about this year. This is the year BL bifurcated, and not every show was for every fan. I think that ended up being really okay, and I am glad that I stared into my own grief with this show. 

“I’m glad I didn’t feel sadness and just run away from it, and pretend that I can’t ever be that. Because I am, more often than I admit sometimes. I get really sad and really lonely. I’ve buried a lot of family members in recent years, and I really struggle to make queer friends and build meaningful long-term [local] queer friendships other than [My Bestie]. Sometimes that feels very lonely, and it’s why I gravitate to BL, I think, because I can imagine a different experience. 

“So, I will say that Eternal Yesterday was really lovely and really poignant, and I’m going to talk about this show more I think as we wrap of this year. If any of you took the time to [read] this, thank you. 

I remember talking in the chat about how this show brought me back to my love for Canadian poet Shane Koyczan. He has a poem about the death of a good friend that came rushing back to me while watching Eternal Yesterday. A kind user has transcribed the poem here.

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I don’t think Eternal Yesterday is going to be for everyone, but what I loved so much about the show was that it never pretended to be anything other than it was, unlike Make Our Days Count or something like Bite Me. We’ve had quite a few BLs using the supernatural this year to discuss grief, but this is the only I think focused on the grief exclusively. Others complicated the grief with the romance, rather than focusing on the romance as the source of the grief. 

I’m in my 30s now. No matter how much love and care we receive and pour into our lives and relationships, we will all face challenges and losses. I am personally thankful that a show tackled a topic as heavy as this with grace and compassion (see @waitmyturtles post). Their perspective on the gentleness of being given a grace period to say goodbye to someone you love as a mystical element in world is beautiful.  

This show ends with Mitsuru taking their trip again in honor of Koichi, but he reveals to us that he did go on to train as a doctor and has been in school for five years. His dad and the other doctor are now seeing each other properly at the conclusion of her divorce. One of their friends remembers Koichi and continues to honor him. The teacher sent him a picture of Koichi and Mitsuru together. This to me implies a hope that someday Mitsuru may heal enough to love again, but he’s not alone. He didn’t also die with Koichi. The love he shared for Koichi pushed him to accept his calling and reframe the relationship with his father. 

For me, this show is a highlight of the year, and an example of what Japan does best: taking things seriously. It doesn’t need to soften the painful elements, because it can be gentle everywhere else. I’m a deeply melancholy person, and so it’s why I often am able to appreciate Japanese and French cinema. There’s something about the way those cultures storytelling traditions handle morbid and dour concepts that always works for me. 

I know Eternal Yesterday hurt for many of you in ways you weren’t ready for, but I hope this and other’s wonderful posts help you to find some peace with your feelings. Thank you all for joining me on this ride.

[masterthespianduchovny]

I do not dislike Michelle Keller, formerly Michelle Lasso, but I do dislike how the series and most fans either refuse to criticize her or defend her.

I understand that fans, esp women, are compelled to defend Michelle because she’s a woman and women are overly criticized and dragged unnecessarily at times. I get that. However, there would be think pieces about Michelle is she were Michael. And I truly hate this current trend of pretending everything is different when it’s a woman involved.

It’s quite strange how people are so sad for Ted being made to feel like he’s too much—hmm, I wonder who made him feel that way—and are rooting for him to have a happy ending with someone who accepts him as he is. Then when you directly criticize Michelle, it’s a ton of excuses about how separation/divorce is hard, Ted wouldn’t be transparent with her, and so forth.

While this is true, intentionally or not, Michelle still hurt Ted in a major way. And, I don’t know about you all, but I believe you should still apologize for hurting someone even if it wasn’t intentional.

Michelle became short tempered with him and had an issue whenever he tried to do things for her. While her reaction wasn’t malicious, there’s nothing wrong with, “hey, I know you meant well. I just—it’s hard being around you and having this life with you when I don’t even feel like I know you. I shouldn’t have lashed out. You didn’t deserve that.”

Boom!

This NEVER happens.

Michelle never has to take any accountability for the things she’s down, which we know has a major effect on Ted. Essentially, people are arguing he deserved that treatment all while saying, “poor Ted.”

Michelle making Ted feel bad for saying “I love you.” I understand Michelle was going through her own shit, but Christ! Would we defending her if the genders were switched? I’ll need to rewatch the episode to really dig into that, but it felt unnecessarily cruel even if she didn’t intend for it to be so.

Someone will correct me on this, but Michelle and ted separate in February and by March of that same year she’s pushing for ted to sign divorce papers. It’s not like he’s a busy man or anything??? Literally most divorces, esp considering how long they’d been married, take a while to happen. Ted fucking granted her the divorce without her even asking and was kind about the entire thing and Michelle is pushing for a divorce within the month.

Is that not strange?

I honestly think this was just a bad writing choice, but my God, I can’t imagine the discourse if Ted was a woman—Thea. And how “Michael” would be dragged for that and people speculating that either they were cheating or wanted to be with new and different women. Not even accounting for how some would relate to “Thea” and how their ex did them dirty.

But again, we can’t talk about that. No matter how fucked up that was, NOPE!

And this recent shit. I don’t even know.

I don’t know if it’s a case of poor writing or not because I don’t think the series is going to go there. Meaning I don’t think the series is going to say Dr. Jacobs groomed Michelle. But let’s keep in mind that he was her therapist originally, and then their marriage counselor. He was the one who fueled Ted’s dislike of therapists and always sided with Michelle. I don’t think Ted even felt like he could be heard.

When Dr. Jacobs realizes it’s Ted, he freezes as if being caught. As if he was cheating with Michelle. Even Michelle is acting suspicious as fuck. There’s no, “I didn’t want him to find out about this, he may take it hard.” It felt like they’d both done something they were supposed to be doing. Both come off as guilty as hell.

Do I think the actually had an affair?

No.

Or maybe it was an emotional affair.

But people love to skip over the shit Michelle does (or inadvertently blame Ted) and it’s fucking annoying. Not necessarily because they don’t pay attention to her, but because the discussion around her behavior when they actually engage with it is either brushing off what she does or defending it.

[akirameta84]

...imagine if part of the reason Aiura made it so Akechi would literally rip out Kuusuke's Rarefaction Cell if it came down to it, was because a part of her wondered if Saiki's collapse was intentional. Rationally she knows that isn't the case. Rationally she knows the only reason Saiki was unable to communicate with anyone was due to him prioritizing survival and a desperate attempt to negotiate via the creation of Aren over talking to anyone. But that doesn't stop a part of her, an overly emotional part of her that's full of anger and grief from wondering if Kuusuke used his seniority privilege to keep Saiki from asking for help. If he drained all the water to cause Saiki's eventual collapse.

Logically she knows otherwise, but that didn't stop her from letting her emotions bleed through in the creation of Akechi and ensuring that no matter what, he will be able to grab Kuusuke's Rarefaction Cell. And no matter what, Saiki will be better off. If it's given up without a fight she'll be happy.

But if there is a fight? She'll feel VINDICATED.

YES agh the emotions

Part of her is also viciously happy about how decayed the Rot has left kuusuke, when her overseers see the inside of his can while following akechi (for the first time in ages because kuusuke is no longer capable of maintaining a lockdown from overseers), simply because it means kuusuke will not be strong enough to stop even a weak slugcat from frolicking in his superstructure, let alone a powerful, purposed one

she feels horribly bad at the same time. but she stays focused on the goal. she knows he has at least one cell left, because zero gravity is still somewhat functional inside of his structure. she just doesn't know if its the only one he has left

when scug akechi gets to it and rips it out, and all anti gravity shuts off...its clear that it actually was his last one. but kuusuke caused the literal death of her closest iterator friend, and with this cell, kusuos communication arrays might become functional again. and besides...the Rot was just going to destroy this rarefaction cell like it had the rest of them.

a lot of her anger dissipates when she sees the sorry state of kuusukes chamber and puppet, but honestly? she mostly feels a sense of bitter revenge. because he got what was coming

shes glad her slugcat didnt stay in the chamber long regardless. she didnt want to see anymore. and he had a duty to do, one her overseers needed to be present to guide him through, because gills or not, the submerged superstructure was still horribly dangerous

also: when akechi enters kusuos chamber, the other slugcats visiting him that cycle nearly maul him on sight because hes holding a suspicious orb that radiates power that could be a bomb for all they know. but kusuo speaks before they can do anything.

"That's...a Mass Rarefaction Cell. The emergency power source of an iterator's superstructure. Even one of them is enough to keep one of us functional. Where...where did you get that?"

the others have marks of communication from their past visits to kuusuke, so they can understand that this is an important object that akechi is amazing for bringing to kusuo

even in his current sorry state, kusuo can piece together the situation. someone in his local group created a purposed organism to deliver a rarefaction cell to him. and he has a guess as to which iterator it was stolen from.

he tells the slugcat where he might find the access shaft to the submerged ruins of his structure anyways, because its already been stolen, so it might as well be delivered to where it needs to go, provided akechi can survive the dangers of the trip, which he does. being able to potentially communicate with his local group again, and access his overseers so he can see places other than his chamber, sounds so nice, too..

thank you for the ask it made me FEEL at 2 in the morning i adore your asks so much <3 at lesst im assuming all this iterator saiki au stuff is thr same person ahdhah maybe even the same person who sent a ton of my scug saiki au asks eheh

regardless tyty again <3

[blondiest]

Can you imagine an easily flustered, shy mello or Near? Who's harder to picture with this personality.

hahaha, i have to say neither of them are particularly easy to picture this way,,, mostly bc i don't actually think Near would fluster that easy (i can more easily see him getting slightly overly enthused / overwhelmed if that makes sense??) and Mello defaults to getting A Little Mad About It whenever confronted with an unfamiliar / uncomfortable emotion (some exceptions for this ofc).

overall i think it's easier for me to imagine Near getting a bit more flustered, esp in a situation in which they're already involved with one another, since i think perhaps in that case he'd feel less of a need to hide his reactions to things?? i'm gonna be totally real right now, it's pretty late here so i reserve the right to clarify / retract some of this tomorrow when i'm more coherent hfhfhggfhfgfgh.

all this being said i'll add that i personally enjoy writing Mello getting flustered more. in his own way, though. TO THE EXCERPTS, FOR CLARIFICATION.

oh. first. special treat for you, since you specifically asked about them being shy. unpublished bit of a WIP that i currently am not actually working on, linked here ❣️

okay. aside from that. literally the entirety of there's nothing i hate more than what i can't have falls into the "mello falling apart" category, but here's a bit i like particularly well:

Near pokes his head in the door, and Mello is hit with the smell of burnt bread. To his great dissatisfaction, the white-haired boy’s eyes don’t stray from Mello’s face for even an instant.

“I burned it the first two times,” Near says. “But I’m trying again.”

“Okay,” Mello says, shifting slightly to let the shirt— Near’s shirt, which by all logic should make it even sexier— fall open a bit more.

Near doesn’t react. The blonde finds himself almost wanting to scream, but instead runs a hand through his hair and looks at Near through half-lidded eyes. It’s a move that, to date, has had a one-hundred percent success rate in getting the attention of potential sex partners.

“I have white grape juice if you would like any,” Near informs him blandly. He is not giving Mello do-me eyes, or any other sign of being affected.

“I’ll pass,” Mello says, trying to sound like he isn’t edging into hysteria.

okay spoilers below this for two other fics lol

from chapter 5 of hot soup on a cold day:

A high-pitched beeping sound pulls Near from slumber a distressingly short period of time later. His head aches slightly from too little sleep, but he hits the “off” button and silences the alarm. Beside him, Mello stirs, blinking blearily up at Near for a few seconds before seemingly waking up all at once. Near watches with dread as the blonde’s face shifts from sleepy relaxation to embarrassment to panic.

“What—!” Mello stammers, mostly failing to muster up a glare. “What the hell are you doing in my bed?!”

The acting is not Mello’s best, to say the least, but he is clearly having a crisis of some kind.

chapter 2 of what doesn't kill me makes me want you more:

Near tilts her head. “You didn’t complain before, when you were kissing me.”

It’s as if a rod is slipped into the other girl’s spine; she goes rigid, then sneers. “That’s because I feel bad for you.”

Near bites back a question— is it common practice for you to kiss people you consider charity cases?— because it’s pointed enough that it could only worsen the situation. “Mello has a kind heart,” she says instead.

That doesn’t go over well, though, anyway.

“Don’t fucking mock me,” Mello spits. “You’re the one who has— you’re the one who’s obsessed with me. I was just taking pity on you.”

uuhhhhh. yeah. anyhow. thank you for the ask!! hopefully this made some kind of sense? it's genuinely hard for me to tell when it's this late in the day jhjgjghfhhhfhh (<- temporarily a european timezone girlie) but it was fun to answer anyways!

[ciaossu-imagines]

I am generally considered very sweet and intelligent, with a delightful sense of humor. I have been told that I have a brilliant mind and crave knowing. I am a true geek at heart and take pride in my vast knowledge across various topics. However, some negative aspects of me are that I can be overly sensitive and often get overwhelmed easily. My self esteem isn’t the best, as I am insecure about myself so I tend to be self deprecating, which can often make people sad. I am working on this as much as I can but it is certainly a struggle, so it’s likely that I’d need frequent reassurance. I love deeply and will fight tooth and nail for those that I love. Thank you so much! I really love Nanbaka and KHR. 👉👈

Hey there anon dear! Thank you so much for sending in something for a match-up! I hope no parts of this got lost and since I didn't have a name to publish you under, I hope you don't mind your ask being posted, and that you'll enjoy your matches!

In my opinion, your ideal Nanbaka match is TROIS!

You and Trois had chemistry right from the get-go. Don't let his pretty face fool you - Trois is a very intelligent man and that was part of what drew him to you right away. He likes the fact he can hold good, intelligent conversations with you, that you show interest in his passions and his intellectual pursuits. Of course, he's also always interested to learn about what you're currently interested in and learning about. Trois likes you teaching him things and, of course, he tries hard to teach you as much as you teach him.

Now, you did mention that you can be rather insecure at times and that definitely will flare up at times during your relationship with Trois. He is a very handsome man and does get hit on a lot and there are times you feel inadequate or worried. Trois is rather more observant than he lets on though and he does notice this, notices you tossing out more self-deprecating 'jokes' and comments. However, Trois is more than willing to give out compliments. This is especially true for his relationship with you, where he will feed you compliments like candy, all truly meant, even when you feel like they might not be or don't seem true. While Trois can be a little brutal in his choice of words at times, and does keep company with Honey, who is even more so, he does his best to keep how sensitive you are to people's words and actions in mind and to not give you reasons to worry.

In my opinion, your ideal KHR match is BYAKURAN!

Now, on the other hand, I do see you and Byakuran having a pretty solid friendship before things turn romantic. Byakuran really is attracted and interested in intelligent people, people with things they're passionate and nerdy about, people who love to constantly be learning. It's because, at his core, Byakuran is this imaginative, creative, fiercely intelligent absolutely geek. He has his passions and interests and the two of you would likely have met and grown a friendship through a shared passion. I think that, over time, your sweet nature, so at odds with his more ambitious and sometimes warped or morbid personality, your company and how you make him feel, how supportive you are to him, and how much you obviously cared about him led him to develop deeper feelings for you and he began to pursue you, with all the signature Byakuran drive, to change the relationship between you to something more romantic.

I do think there are times your sensitive nature, the fact you get overwhelmed, and your lack of self-esteem does cause some issues in the relationship. And honestly, because Byakuran is who he is, I do think there are times he might even try to provoke those emotions in you. I'm sorry but Byakuran is not always the healthiest in relationships. However, most of the time, Byakuran is more than reassuring. He loves spoiling you rotten, drops compliments and gifts in heaps at your figurative feet. It's just that sometimes he gets distracted by things he's really into at the moment or he gets in a mood and wants his own reassurance about how bad you need or want him around and gets distant to make you chase him. If you can hold up to those times and fight for him against his own unhealthy habits, I do see this relationship being happy a large majority of the time and you become someone he is actually absolutely loyal to.

[adamwatchesmovies]

Quiz Lady (2023)

There was a time when I saw every movie released in theaters. When I did, I saw films like Quiz Lady every couple of months. This is a fine comedy that gets pretty wacky but reels itself in with some good character-based drama. You won’t necessarily cry or fall out of your seat laughing but it’s a good time and a pleasant way to spend 90 or so minutes. What elevates Quiz Lady above its peers is the cast. Together, Awkwafina and Sandra Oh carry this film to the winner’s podium.

After her gambling addict of a mother flees to Macau, Anne (Awkwafina) is frustrated, but unsurprised. Then, a loan shark named Ken (Jon “Dumbfoundead” Park) kidnaps Anne’s dog. He won’t return Mr. Linguini unless she repays her mother’s $80,000 debt. Luckily, Anne’s sister, Jenny (Sandra Oh) has an idea. Since childhood, Anne has been religiously watching the game show Can’t Stop the Quiz. Her in-depth knowledge of trivial matters means she has what it takes to win the competition’s top prize.

I remember the first time I saw Awkwafina’s name in a trailer for a movie. At the time I thought this was another “Rihanna in Battleship” sort of scenario but she’s become one of my favorite actresses thanks to her exceptional performances. When I say that, you probably imagine that this film will have her character go through all sorts of emotional ups and downs. Not really. What makes her so good here is the way she bounces off of Sandra Oh. They have outstanding chemistry. You forget every other time you’ve seen them in something else and think only of them as sisters. Not ordinary sisters, however. These siblings are far enough apart in age that they were never really close when they were young and still aren’t most of the time, but once in a while connect in a way only sisters can. They keep the film on track when certain toilet-related punchlines threaten to derail the movie. It all comes together particularly well during the conclusion, which is heartfelt because it builds on many little moments introduced throughout - things you thought were just throwaway gags.

Other standout elements include Will Ferrel as Terry McTeer, the longtime host of “Can’t Stop the Quiz” who is sweet but not very bright, Tony Hale as a staff member of a Benjamin Franklin-themed hotel and Jason Schwartzman as Ron Heacock, the current Can’t Stop the Quiz champion. The film does Schwartzman's character a disservice by making him overly villainous during the conclusion, but he’s fun to cheer against nonetheless. These, along with the stars and the conclusion make up for the so-so middle. Writer Jen D’Angelo and Jessica Yu couldn’t seemingly find a whole lot for our heroines to do between coming up with the idea of competing in Can’t Stop the Quiz and the competition itself, which is why the film falls back on that old trope of having a character accidentally take drugs and go on a hallucinogenic trip at the most inappropriate time. While the emotional moments are pretty steady, the comedy is uneven. Sometimes, it’s wild and out there, like when we see that Mr. Linguini’s kidnappers are treating him exceptionally well so that the dog doesn’t want to go back to his rightful owner. In other scenes, it’s much more grounded in reality and satirical, like when Anne unintentionally goes viral as “The Quiz Lady” and her co-workers suddenly start treating her like a prop they can use in their own vlogs.

I wouldn’t have been upset seeing Quiz Lady in the cinema on a Sunday morning and seeing it at home “for free” (all you need is a Hulu subscription) seals the deal. It’s got laughs, a fun surprise cameo, enough memorable jokes and most importantly, excellent performances from Awkwafina and Sandra Oh. They’re so good together, the film is worth seeing for them alone. (November 19, 2023)

[sexyvampkitty]

RP Mini-Solo 14: 'Where Do I Go From Here?'

I stir awake...wrapped tightly in the arms of my current lover...my head lying on his naked chest...wondering how I ever got here in the first place. Totally beyond my control...my mind begins to wander off all on its own. My humanity is still off...but...it's moments like these...in between the realm of dreams and full awareness...when my guard is momentarily down...that my emotions are able to slip through a tiny crack in the wall that I've erected around my heart. This is the second time that I've flipped my switch...and...on this round...it's getting harder to keep my emotions at bay...no matter how hard I try to keep them from flooding back in...like right now...at this very instant...as I think back on all of the events that have transpired recently...starting with me dumping my ex boyfriend...to my ex husband dumping me...to where I am now. After three or so endless months of traveling around the country, trying to locate my bastard of an ex husband so that I could stake him...and leaving bloodless...and most of the time headless...corpses...both human and vampire...scattered across several states...I'd decided to give up and go back home to Mystic Falls. The trail had finally gone cold. I like mindless killing as much as the next murderous vampire...but it started to get old 'real' fast. Plus I was worried about a hunter discovering the trail that I was leaving behind...tracking me down...and staking me for my troubles instead. Screw that. I've died enough times to last a century...thank you very much. It was obvious that my ex husband was nowhere to be found. He could've high-tailed it back to Mystic Falls...or he could've been in another country for all I knew...possibly married to another vampire with a new family of his own...since he probably never had that pesky voodoo curse thingy lifted yet. Hey...whatever. Even now...the human part of me...buried deep...'deep' down...only resurfacing in fleeting glimpses...wishes for him to be happy...and to have the life that he always wanted...while the dominant, vampire part of me wishes that he would burn in Hell for all eternity. If that makes me a total bitch...then fine...I can live with that. Anyway...I decided to pack up and go home. I had 'no' idea what I was going to do...or where I was going to go when I got there...since I didn't exactly have a home to go back 'to' anymore...so...the first thing that I did when I crossed back over the town border...was head directly for the Mystic Grill. I walked right on in...up to the bar...plopped myself down onto one of the stools...and started ordering myself some drinks...compelling the cute bartender guy to keep them coming. Yep...drink now...figure out where to crash after. It sounded like a good plan to me. A short time later, who should I see come up to the bar and sit down on the stool right next to mine...but someone who looked 'exactly' like my ex husband, though...the expression plastered across his face wasn't quite as...soft. I'd recognize that particular Damon twin anywhere. He was the one known as 'Ruthless'...and he'd also tried to kill me on multiple occasions. No surprise there. Anyway...somehow...we got around to striking up a conversation...and I ended up blurting out the whole overly depressing story of what had happened between me and my ex husband to him...of course...I was quite a few shots of Bourbon in at this point. What happened next...completely shocked me...if almost choking on my current drink was any indication. When Damon...aka 'Ruthless'...asked me to be his 'fuck friend with benefits'...I had no clue what to say at first. I had 'no' idea why he did it...I guess he kind of felt...sorry for me...maybe? I just sat there for awhile...a 'long' awkward while...totally silent...eyes wide and mouth hanging open...glass paused in mid-air...then...I figured...why not? He's crazy 'hot'...like the rest of the Damon twins...and a 'friends with benefits' type situation was all that I had ever wanted in the first place. The problem was that my ex husband had wanted the whole package...pets...two kids...complete with a house with a white picket fence I imagine...while I...didn't...even though I tried to constantly convince myself that I did. Anyway...again...after I had finished off my last shot...'Ruthless' and I left the Grill together...he took me back to his house...and we had awesome...mind-numbing sex together...and we've had sex many times since that night. It's unfair to compare that sex to any that I've had before...still...damn. Now...as I lay here...sleepily tracing patterns over Damon's chest with my fingers...I can't help but wonder...where I'm supposed to go from here. I mean, sure, our situation is fine for now...but will it be enough in the future? What if he wants more? What if he eventually asks me to marry him or something? I'm not sure that I can go through that...ever again...not after what happened with...well...just...no. I tried to make it work with my ex husband...I really did...but...in the end...I realized that we were...just never meant to be...and I was struggling too hard to try to hold onto a dream...but I was too 'nice' to leave him...so he left me instead. Damn human emotions. I swear, I'm better off without them. Then there's my ex boyfriend...my former 'Boo'...'Hotness'. 'Way' in the back of my mind...I keep holding onto the hope that we'll get back together someday...but...the more time that goes by...the more that hope begins to fade out...and I know that it will just die altogether at some point. He was my first...and I will always love him...and probably never get over him...but a part of him probably still hates me for breaking his heart. We're probably through...no matter how hard I try to cling onto the threads of that tattered dream as well. I squirm a bit...opening my eyes wider while yawning at the same time. I manage to sit up a little...despite still being locked within Damon's embrace...and shake my head back and forth...trying to clear the troubled thoughts from my mind. I then close my eyes again and take a few deep breaths...in...and out...trying to shove my emotions back behind their stone wall...just a little bit more...there...got it. My eyes snap yet again...my lips suddenly dipping down into a deep frown. Damn. Now I'm wide awake. And I'm freaking 'starving'...and human blood just won't cut it. I need vampire blood. Now. I turn my head...glancing at the small clock on the bedside table. Three o'clock in the morning. Perfect. Maybe there will still be some vampires out prowling around. My veins are itching and burning like crazy...my fangs are fixing to come out...and if I don't get out of here...right now...I'm going to end up feeding on 'Ruthless'. I 'really' don't want to take his blood without permission...not unless I have to. I tried that with my ex boyfriend a few times...and...let's just say that it didn't go over too well when he found out about it later...since I took his blood while he was sleeping...with a syringe...'long' story. Carefully, I manage to untangle myself from his arms...climb out of bed...open the closet door and take out one of his shirts...quickly throwing it on...then make my way out of the room...down the stairs...and out the front door as quietly as possible. I vamp speed down the walkway...then away from the house and into the woods...searching for victims...fully aware of the fact that I'm running around with no panties on...but...the shirt that I'm wearing is long enough on me that it totally covers my...ummm...lady parts...since I'm a 'lot' shorter than Damon...so...I'm good. With no luck in the first few minutes...I decide to veer off a bit...heading even further into the trees...just before sunrise...I return...more pissed off and hungry than ever. I couldn't find a single vampire anywhere. Figures. I guess I'll have to feed on 'Ruthless' after all. I'll ask him when he wakes up. For now...I walk over to the little liquor table slash island...snag myself a whole bottle of Bourbon...and plop down onto the couch with it. I twist off the top...lifting the bottle to my lips and taking a long pull from it...then...bottle still in hand...I lie back...and let my eyes drift closed for a few more hours... (END)

[mercurytrinemoon]

Another post on Moon signs you can drag me for

Before we get into the actual thing, I'd like to say this post initially started as something else but ultimately, what I tried to put across is, sometimes Moon signs aren’t that easy to decipher. It’s easy to grasp overall characteristics of the signs and then learn how to identify their specific traits. But what people seem to forget it that Moon represents the deepest side of us & our inner world - it’s uncommon to really see someone’s side of it unless you really pay attention. Sometimes I’m surprised to see what someone’s Moon sign is even if I know this person well. Meaning, people usually hide that part of them - or they just simply process it internally and others can’t see their emotional reactions. It’s also uncommon for folks these days to fully express their emotional needs so it gets even trickier to pin-point their Moon characteristics. I don't think I have to mention this but, of course, your entire chart should be taken into account, as well as house placement, aspects. Personally, I like to also look at Moon's dispositor.

Let’s start from my friends, Gemini Moons, who, I feel, get a bad rep for not showing their feelings and scanning every emotion like an AI. Nah-ah. I know this one Gemini Moon whose immediate emotional reactions aren’t very cerebral in the sense of processing everything in the mind and intellectualizing it aka, what people like to label as being un-emotional. Instead her reactions are often fast (air energy) but physically expressed through Mercury (Gemini Moon’s dispositor) and Sun (overall identity) – she has them both in Aries. She’s a crybaby who can burst into tears in a matter of seconds. So she’s not something that would stereotypically be assigned to a Gemini Moon. But what I did notice is that all Gemini Moons tend to have this weird look on their face when they’re processing stuff. As if they were about to have a brain malfunction; they stop and have that specific worried look. They also like to either gossip or tell stories (either real or made up lol); they’re great with words - they can talk for hours if they feel comfortable with you. They just crave interaction and mental stimulation. Their quick reactions tend to make them effortlessly witty. Even if they’re a withdrawn Gemini type, they make up for it through social media and technology or just a quiet exploration. My shy Cancer pal with Moon in Gemini is now a brand/website designer and an instagram queen who travels the world. This is great energy for content creators in general. And don’t forget that Geminis need to have their fingers in many pies. It’s because they always have a backup plan… and they get bored easily so they need that chaos around them to feel at home. They like to have options in everything, which is kind of funny cause it’s hard for them to make up their minds and actually choose something. And they store a lot of information in their brains… I feel like it must be exhausting, no? 

On the other side of the axis, whenever I see someone with a Sagittarius Moon, I can immediately say “yup, a Sag Moon indeed” (probably thanks to my Sag stellium), meaning, they all seem the same to me. Sag Moons often find comfort in exploration - best if it’s literal travel. They always seem to need to free themselves from their surroundings, family, roots or their own culture to discover something new and exciting, even if it’s only in the imaginary words - through books, movies and other medias. Their happiness always lies somewhere else from where they currently are. Like, I think all Sagittarius Moons that I know have left their parents and went their own paths early on. And they have this yolo attitude. Just like Sagittarius Suns, they’re massive dorks, probably also obnoxious… sometimes in a REALLY annoying way. They’re either a) very wise and curious b) lil preachy and stuck up c) just plain dumb clowns with no filter. But they’re all funny. And they take things lightly, with a natural ease. This means sometimes they may offend other people just because they assume everyone’s as chill as they are; „relax! I was just kidding!” - that’s a phrase you’ll hear from them often… I mean, unless you’re a jokester yourself and you’re unmoved by their sarcastic or teasing words. They have somewhat spiritual or philosophical nature so besides making you laugh, be prepared for deep monologues. They want to believe everything will eventually fall into place. It’s also hard to bring them down - or I should say, it’s hard to make them acknowledge that they're feeling down - they always try to distract or cover it up with a joke, usually a self-depricating one. If Sagittarius Moon (or Sagittarius in general tbh) is telling you that they’re unhappy, then it’s serious.

I’ve noticed there comes a point in life for a Libra Moon where they just have enough. They’re too nice for everyone and one day they wake up and yell about how they have to do everything for everyone and everyone wants something from them and bLah bLah. Makes me think of when Bieber was this overly nice kid and then he was like “I’M NOT TAKING PICTURES WITH FANS ANYMOREEEE AAGhJFJFUWIUq”. Yup, a Libra Moon, everyone. They know how to charm and appeal to people, I think overall they’re easily liked by others. Sometimes it’s simply because they like to kiss people’s ass just to avoid being rejected. That’d be a Libra Moon’s nightmare. They like other people’s company too much. And they thrive in relationships and in a big circle of friends. What they hate is confrontations (like every other Libra placement omg). They may be good mediators when it comes to other people but if they’re involved in an argument they get sooooo passive aggressive. They just don’t know how to handle conflicts - it’s as if their nervous system wasn’t designed for emotional outbursts (because, you know, everything needs to be peaceful and harmonious Venus-style). A fussy or angry Libra Moon will suddenly get loud as they blame someone for something… and then they’ll leave the room cause they’re scared to even hear the other side of the argument. Or, alternatively, they’ll make a doormat out of themselves just to stay quiet and avoid causing any rift. And making decisions? I think it’s common for them to have two different romantic interests and feeling so dramatically torned between them *Alexa play Agony from Into the Woods*. Then when they decide, they have problems breaking the bad news to one of them.

On the other end we have Aries Moons. *deep breath* Listen, I think I’ve said enough about having Moon in Aries (or rather purely dissing it) but last time it made a bit of controversy so why not wreak even more havoc. I have a good description for this one: I will punch you but be gentle with me cause it’s easy to break my fragile heart. So basically, imagine putting Buttercup and Bubbles into one person. And honestly, I need to say this, women with this placement are just hot badasses, look at friggin Angelina Jolie. The queen of badass. The queen of hot. People say because Aries folks move quickly (literally and figuratively lol), they often get bored with whatever got them excited last week... or yesterday. Ha, yeah, right. You get their heart to open up and they’re going to have their eyes for you ONLY, like a lil puppy. Give us treats and we’ll build our world around you. But NOT in a clingy way by any means, we need our space and independence after all. My lil niece is an Aries Moon and ever since I started playing guitar with her, she became my #1 fan or something. That’s the energy. But we get easily bored with day-to-day stuff so yeah, there’s that. Innocent and clumsy yet raw in their emotions - so there’s potential to make mistakes sometimes (or a lot of times) or having this tunnel vision, like „I want this and I don’t care about anything else!”. And then excusing it with some „but the heart wants what it wants” crap (looking @ ya, Selena Gomez). They experience constant inner movement and turbulence that needs a physical outlet in order to feel satisfied. WE NEED PASSION IN OUR LIVES, OKAY?!?!?? now leave me alone

Aquarius Moons aren’t as cold as you might think. People like to describe them as if their Moons actually disappeared from their charts: dEtaCheD, uNeMotiOnaL, tHey fEeL nOtHinG. It’s just they don’t sit and dwell on things, they find solutions to the problems. If something doesn’t make them feel right, they just leave that situation. They do care about other people’s well-being, they’re very sensitive in that regard, they’re humanitarians after all. Yeah, they detach, but from their own emotions - in order to make sense of them. They may seem like snow queens sometimes (and this comes from an Aqua rising) but they’re really friendly and if you pique Aqua Moon’s interest, they’re going to be curious about you. They like new exciting things so if you’re cool enough, you have their attention. Usually they’re pretty progressive as well and can’t stand injustice. That’s why you’ll see them standing up for those who are in need. Uranian energy gives them a specific type of sharp intuition and wit. Idk they’re just cute in a quirky way. But this buzzing, fast energy is a great recipe for anxiety, over-thinking and frequent changes of heart. Similarly to Sadges, they need constant exploration and stimuli. Intelligent, people-oriented (but not people-pleasing! Look to Libras for that), individualistic. They definitely need their own space and independence. Their decision-making is fast and it’s easy for them to just say „screw it, I’m doing this”. My Aquarius Moon friend just casually decided that she’s moving to Turkey cause nothing in our city (or even country) seems interesting or helping her expand… So she was like, see ya suckers, I’m leaving.

Leo Moons shine from within. You’ll spot them from a mile away even if they’re on the shyer side. They’re all lil stars no matter their profession. Very expressive people & easily excitable. Art galleries, live shows, theater - they love a creative environment even if they don’t pursue that lifestyle themselves... One of my Leo Moon friends is an art junkie – suggest taking her to an obscure play at the local bar, a music festival, a weird museum – she’ll say yes in the blink of an eye. And she loves discussing these things. A Leo Moon may not see themselves as artistically inclined, but usually sooner or later they at least try dipping their toes in music, arts, acting, dancing... you name it. They’ll learn a simple 3-chord song on a ukulele and then play it to you in excitement. Imagine a lil kid making you a puff piece and being super proud of it. Sometimes they just need some encouragement. Remember, Leos feed off of praise, that’s their fuel. Doesn’t mean they’re all proud, egotistical people but what it does mean is that they need a lil assurance to gain their self-confidence. I lived with a Leo Sun/Moon for almost 15 years (who’s a musician btw so yeah, a classic creative Leo type) - he did have some issues lol but ego wasn’t one of them. Drama followed him everywhere but I’m pretty sure he disliked it himself. BUT, with that being said, I feel like Leo Moons tend to dramatize themselves internally. People say it’s something Virgos or Geminis would do - because of their tendency to overthink, but Leos can just go straight to a worst-case scenario in their heads simply because they exaggerate everything. So don’t be surprised to see a Leo Moon feeling down and anxious. On the bright side, be their cheerleader and they’ll give that to you in return. They need sparks and dullness kills their upbeat spirit. They need to feel their own heartbeat so the feeling of excitement is crucial for their well-being. Romantic, giving and kind. They’re fixed fire so once they’re set on something or someone, they give their all and are rather loyal.

I feel like my chart low-key tells me I should dislike Taurus Moons but I just want to melt in their arms and just stay there? Like, forever? Low maintenance but a bit slow-moving and stubborn. They won’t settle easily, at least not officially, so you need to have a lot of patience with them. They need 3 things to feel secure and at peace: physical stimuli, time and a stable place they know they can always come back to. And it’s not like all of them are total lazy homebodies, they may be active spirits & travellers but they are going to have a reallyyyyy nice cosy flat somewhere near their childhood place (gotta be be close to their moms, you know). Not necessary materialistic but they may have one thing that they collect throughout their entire life and they won’t. ever. get. rid. of. it. There needs to be at least one constant in their life - like you know when Elton John decided to go to therapy but one thing he stuck to was shopaholism? Very Taurus Moon of him. Also, they’re very affectionate. In fact, may have issues differentiating between affection and passion - this is actually something Taurus Moon and Aries Moon have in common. Pro tip - and this is in regard to all Taurus placements - don’t smell bad when you’re around them (I mean, don't smell bad in general, no one likes stinky people lol). They have a sensitive smell. Doesn’t help that they like to smell everything. EVERYTHING. I swear, Taurus, stop sticking your nose in every single thing!!! You don't need to know how that piece of utensil smells like. Jeez.

Scorpio Moon (shoutout to those who remember me accidentally calling them sporpio last time I made a post on Moons lol). I honestly don’t know what to tell you... I feel like all you hear about Scorpio Moon is 100% true, there’s nothing to debunk here. It’s the Moon of extremes. Prone to jealousy and surpressing emotions; severe trust issues; they’re instigators. I was low-key bullied by a few Scorpio Moons when I was in school so there’s that. Very secretive and private. Scorpio Moon will be like “I’m in control of the situation!!!!” and you’ll just look at them and think, yeah, right, looks like the situation is controlling you. But keep being in denial, sure. Like, don’t get me wrong, Scorpios in general can be TOTAL SWEETHEARTS OMG but ya’ll have issues. Even celebrities who have this placements... Think Beyonce or Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus... I feel like they have issues lol, especially with control and the need for everything to be perfectly the way they want it to be. To be fair, that’s probably why they’re all so influential and high status: it’s either their way or highway. They need constant reinvention; they’re the ones to wake up one day and decide they’re going through a spiritual awakening blah blah. They also like to talk about dark and shocking topics while having casual lunch with you... So like, be warned that you may end up with a depressed mood after talking to them for 10 minutes. And their mood swings... don’t even get me started on that.

I don't know where to start with Virgo Moons... I feel like they're very calculated and nit-picky but they're a lot warmer than Virgo Suns. I think I called them softies in my last Moon post. Very sweet people but prone to anxiety. You gotta experience seeing them having a heart attack over someone mixing bananas with milk or messing with their stuff that’s been put in a perfect arrangement. I saw a Virgo Moon once literally squealing shouting "YOU'RE GONNA RUIN YOUR LAPTOP WITH THAT SUPERGLUE!!!" Highly entertaining to watch, not gonna lie. Gordon Ramsay has his Moon in Virgo - it’s conjunct Uranus and Pluto so that’s an extreme but I think him being fed up with people over small inconsistencies in their food prep is a perfect example of this energy (btw his chart is hilarious, it literally explains EVERYTHING). They're VERY picky with their food as well, just as Virgo Suns tend to be. Like, they’ll only have a specific type of single origin coffee or they’ll be vegan or something. Self-critical over their work, which is a plus... except for when finishing a simple task takes them a few hours because they want to make it perfect. They take everything seriously. This of course doesn't mean they're total bores - on the contrary, Mercurial energy gives them witty approach and a talent for choosing the right words at the right time. Tho they can be a bit awkward or shy with it. Can be as bubbly as Gemini but the grounded earthy energy gives them more practical and almost nurturing nature - earth signs are providers after all and Virgo is the sign of service - helping others is like their second nature. I’ve noticed they often find comfort in devoting themselves to a choosen task - this is why if they pursue something, they’re really good at it. They’re also very likely to dissect their emotions.

I’m not a fan of water Moons in general but Pisces Moon is the best water Moon in my opinion. Maybe because I like Pisces overall. I think it’s like a tweaked Sagittarius Moon - just more internalized, withdrawn & gloomy. But unlike Sag, who has a tendency to be an adventurous optimist, Pisces likes to focus on the negatives instead. Obviously, they can be very upbeat, they’re Jupiter-ruled after all, but there’s somehing whiny about them lol. Just like Sadges, they dream big and have their standards put up sooo high but if there's not much active energy in their charts, they’re often too passive to actually fullfill any of that - or I should say, they’re stuck daydreaming about it, believing it’ll just magically manifest for them... OR they do everything with an apathetic approach. What I do like about them is that they’re funny. And really chill - sometimes to the point of coming off as confused or hazy. I feel like a lot of them would just love to sleep all day... or sit by the lake and just think about the world. Most of them are also compassionate folks - again, maybe a bit too much. Hey Pisces, you don’t have to take everything to heart, it’s okay. On the bright side, they have big imagination and the ability to disconnect and just create. I have a few Pisces Moons in the family: one’s that sleepy artistic type with grand visions, one is an asshole-ish but funny entrepreneur with a questionable work ethic and one is a witty IT guy who’s actually a workaholic and likes to shut in his own world of computers and numbers or whatever he does there... So there’s this factor of tunnel vision, escapism and, on the more negative side, being kinda iffy and almost addicted to the way they want things to be. Once they set their eyes on something it’s done deal…

My issue with Capricorn Moons is that they're often trying to be sooooo mature omg, like, loosen up a bit. It usually starts when they're in their later teens... They can be the most rebellious kid that likes to have fun and suddenly they'll be like "I'm too old for this ugh grow up" *judgmental stare*. My 18-year old niece once literally roasted my sister that she's in her 30s and still doesn't have her own place (well so do I so I guess she also indirectly roasted me as well???). And she was SO deadpan with it. Because she herself wants to be independent and start a family before turning 25. This is classic Capricorn Moon energy. They suck out joy out of everything lol. Of course, OF COURSE, it depends on the whole chart but I feel like worst-case scenario is that at one point in their life (or maybe even a few times throughout it) they go through a massive shake-up that makes them change their attitude and re-evaluate their structures. There's this multi-instrumentalist Yvette Young - she's a sweet, funny Cancer/Leo mix but her Moon is in Capricorn. She used to be a competitive pianist but the pressure that was put on her has led her to severe health issues. Like yes, she’s now an extremely talented musician - thanks to family’s expectations & a rigid schooling system (Saturn) but it did cost her a lot. She has recovered since then but I think it's a perfect example of this energy. It’s very ambitious and hardworking but emotionally demanding in the sense that you have to actually put your emotions aside in order to deal with the rest. Another thing, because Moon can be associated with family, there's often a weird dynamic surrounding this topic. I don't think I've met a Capricorn Moon that had a completely healthy and happy relationship with their fam or one of the family members. Or, alternatively, there can be a strong bond between one of them but usually created in the atmosphere of hardships.

Last but not least, Cancer Moons. I had three school friends with this placement and all of them made this sad, whiny face as they said „oh I don’t knoooow anymoreee”  when they were feeling torned or frustrated. To be fair, two of them are water Suns so for them, it added to the mushyness. All Cancer Moons I know are family people or better yet, baby people. One of those school friends is now a guidance counsellor, working with kids; the other turned her instagram into a gallery of her own child after she gave birth. So much kid content, omg. There’s also something very indecisive about them… or I should say, hesitant. They’re not very fast at making decisions. Also, what’s interesting, they’re kind of like walking libraries, they remember a lot – so they store a lot of information in their brains just like air signs but they process it in a completely different way – emotional, obviously. I think this also makes them hold grudges a lot. For them it’s more of a question of „how does it make me feel?” rather than „how valid is it?”. There’s certain stubborness in them in that regard because they don’t keep their minds open. It’s also hard for them to walk away from people and situations, like a crab pinching you with its claws – it won’t let go. Sensitive but not easy to open up; very protective of themselves and their loved ones & they tend to shut down in their crab shells. But they may crave connection and the feeling of belonging. Also very caring and with a big imagination. They’re very receptive of their environment so mood swings are a thing for them.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 299: No Chains Left

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “and then AFO broke out all of the inmates from six other prisons and took a nap. well anyways, here’s the hospital angst.” Kacchan woke up two days later and was all, “WAIT BUT HOW ARE DEKU AND TODOROKI AND ALL OF THE OTHER CHARACTERS EXCEPT IIDA DOING” and then we cut to Shouto’s room where the other U.A. kids were sitting around being Mutually Traumatized and giving each other moral support and such. Everyone was alll, “...”, and then the rest of the Todofam showed up, INCLUDING POSSIBLY REI?! which, omg. The chapter ended with Kacchan STOMPING THROUGH THE HALLS all “WHADDYA MEAN DEKU HASN’T WOKEN UP YET”, dragging along Satou and Mineta behind him, fueled by the power of ALL OF THE FUCKS HE NOW GIVES. He gives so many fucks now you guys. This boy cares so much he can probably deduct it on his taxes.

Today on BnHA: SPEAKING OF PEOPLE WHO GIVE A LOT OF FUCKS, the story cuts abruptly to Hawks, freshly recovering from his near-death experience, and pondering the threads that have weaved the tapestry of his life and led him to this moment. Basically he grew up in poverty with his Jerk Dad and Jerk Mom until his dad got arrested one day and his mom sent him off to go Find Money Or Something, and so he rescued a busload of people and found himself a new career. Back in the present day, Hawks and Jeanist ride around town in Jeanist’s Jamborghini having awkward encounters with civilians in a country on the brink of social collapse, and visiting Hawks’s mother’s home. Hawks is all “I know from an outsider’s perspective it must look like my life currently sucks, but now that the HPSC is gone, my public image is shot, and my parents are finally out of my life, I’m actually feeling SURPRISINGLY GOOD.” Anyway so he’s gonna go meet up with Endeavor now, and p.s. this chapter was fucking fantastic though, damn.

oh my god?? is this Hawks narration?? something about him growing up watching the heroes on TV and thinking of them as fictional characters

okay I scrolled down a little bit more to see the rest of that “Keigo” panel, and wow

this is basically a shed. poor boy definitely grew up rough. let me tell you guys, I came in here ready for some BakuDeku shenanigans; I was not prepared for Hawks Flashback Angst. I AM HERE FOR IT, but also wow I gotta brace myself now lol

HELLO MISTER HAWKS’S JERK DAD, SIR

BnHA sure does have an array of Jerk Dads, doesn’t it. makes me appreciate characters like Masaru and JirouDad all the more for bucking the trend

anyway. so Horikoshi, you really thought that one itty bitty chapter of hospital catharsis would be enough to calm us all before you went right back to showing us child abuse huh. my god man can we rest

BABY HAWKS

swear to god this kid can’t be more than five or six, and yet he has this completely blank look on his face even with his dad looming over him being all threatening and shit. like he’s shut down his emotions to protect himself. imagine what has to happen to a child for him to have learned this at such a young age. fuck

AND MEANWHILE THIS GUY

don’t mingle with humans?? not “other” humans, just humans?? what is this implying here?? and also holy shit Hawks definitely didn’t inherit his looks from his dad orz

then again he doesn’t really bear much of a resemblance to his strung-out mom here either

omg omg omg. and this child is basically trapped here in this environment with these two people. this explains a SHITLOAD about Hawks’s personality though you guys. his ability to completely separate his real thoughts from the face he presents to the outside world. his pragmatic approach to analyzing and solving problems. his layers of emotional walls. turns out almost none of that came from the HPSC training -- that was all learned hands-on in his own personal do-or-die survival nightmare childhood!! oh, boy

and small wonder then that he latched on to Endeavor so strongly if he really is the one who brought down his dad and inadvertently saved him from this. also, just putting this out there, I know people are always talking about him and Dabi being foils, and I think it’s very interesting how Touya grew up in a household where he saw firsthand the dark side of hero society, and so ended up becoming a villain in order to bring it down. whereas young Keigo had almost the exact opposite experience, growing up experiencing the dark side of villain society and becoming a hero in order to bring about a world where no one else has to experience that. just. both of them are so determined not to become their fathers. some interesting parallels there

so Hawks was sort of an accident after his parents had “thanks for helping me not get caught after I killed that guy” sex, and now this little boy is growing up in squalor and being beaten by his father for things like Sitting In The Wrong Out-Of-The-Way Corner Trying Not To Be A Bother To Anybody. holy fuck. this is so rough to read through you guys

wait so does Jerk Dad have a an eyeball manipulation quirk?? because he doesn’t have the wings like his son, but wth are these things??

this presumably also means that Keigo has never been to school or anything either. he basically doesn’t exist. he thinks heroes are fictional characters, he doesn’t realize that they’re real people. these are people who could help him if he could escape and find them, but he doesn’t know, and they don’t know about him

OH MY GOD HE’S JUST SITTING IN HIS CORNER HUGGLING HIS ENDEAVOR PLUSH OH MY GOD

how could this child possibly have an anti-fandom when he’s done NOTHING WRONG HIS ENTIRE LIFE. huh. just explain that to me. lol I mean I’m not looking to pick a fight with anyone, but also, MAYBE I AM, idk?? this kid has gotten me all riled up lmao

anyways, Protect Keigo 2021, and thank you Horikoshi for these three very terrible pages. I am pleased to inform you that you’ve effectively gotten your point across and you may now commence saving this kid already

YAY

oh no, Keigo’s dumbass jerk dad tried to steal a car and the popo nabbed his ass and now his mom can’t just sit around neglecting her VERY YOUNG SON all day long, oh horrors. sorry lady my tiny violin is on backorder. just imagine that I’m playing a very sarcastic song on it for you

anyway so what are you gonna do now, abandon him? I can hardly imagine he’d be worse off, if anything it might be a near-instant improvement

LMAO HE’S ALL “WAIT WHAT ENDEAVOR’S A REAL FUCKING DUDE?!”

AND THEY SAY THAT A HERO CAN SAVE US~~~~ I’M NOT GONNA STAND HERE AND WAAAAAIT~~~~~ I’LL HOLD ONTO THE WINGS OF THE EAGLES, WATCH AS WE ALL FLY AWAAAAAAY~~~~

lol what a randomly pivotal moment in his young life. TIME TO GO MAKE THESE MEMES INTO DREAMS YOUNG ONE

anyway so his mom freaked out and grabbed him and they wound up at a train station with her TELLING HIM TO GO GET HER SOME MONEY, oh my god. SURE MOM LEMME JUST WALTZ RIGHT ON DOWN TO THE “JOBS FOR FIVE-YEAR-OLDS” STORE AND TELL THEM I NEED SOME CASH. ffff manifesting someone to come help him in 3... 2...

...

SIGH, JUST GO RESCUE THE PEOPLE FROM THE BUS, KEIGO. is this the outfit he was wearing when that happened?? it must be, right?? I can’t imagine them surviving more than a couple days out here unless this starts getting REALLY dark in a way I know that even Horikoshi won’t explore, so yeah. cut to the HPSC now please. never thought we’d be glad to see them. I mean sure, it may be an “out of the frying pan...” case, but good god

THANK YOU!!

and I guess it was his mom’s eyeball quirk then. anyway, whatever, see you again never, hopefully. lol oh man. thaaaat, was upsetting. need to center myself here for a sec. NAMASTE

OH YAY THE PRESENT

so we cut from Baby Hawks Angst straight to Present Day Hawks Angst, huh. not that this exhausted and traumatized lil lad isn’t still a baby to me too, I’ll have you know

BEST JEANIST, ALWAYS WITH THE JOKES

“WHEW, THOUGHT YOU DIED ON ME FOR A SEC THERE KID.” lmao. Caleb will no doubt ruin this by making his word choice all stiffly formal as usual, so I’m just going to treasure this “WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT, I’M FRESH OUT OF FUCKS” version of Jeanist while I can

look at him, driving his Jeanistmobile

again, is it any wonder Kacchan was bitching about Endeavor’s dinky little car when he was used to riding around town in style like this. anyone else staring at this panel trying to figure out how this car is somehow secretly made of jeans

NOOOOO

FUCK YOU DABI LMAO. PUTTING THESE VOICE ACTORS OUT OF A JOB ONE BY ONE

anyway so Jeanist is all “GOOD THING IT’S THE FUTURE AND WE’RE SO GOOD AT MEDICAL SCIENCE” to handwave how Hawks went from one step shy of being a very handsome corpse, to sitting around texting Jeanist in a car all of two days later

OH MY GOD, AND FINALLY AN EXPLANATION FOR THIS

wait a minute. I’m so confused lmfao. soooo, was Hawks all “anyway, here’s Jeanist’s dead body, you can examine it but please don’t look at him too closely and also I’m gonna need that back unharmed.” how tf did you pull that off lmao

(ETA: also isn’t this technically confirmation of the ol’ Noumu Jeanist theory lol. I’m gonna go ahead and say it is.)

NO BUT PLEASE, CONTINUE. I unironically love reading Horikoshi’s overly convoluted “SEE IT’S NOT A PLOT HOLE” explanations

lkldslfk so wait, you’re telling me Hawks convinced Dabi and the League to put Jeanist’s body in storage, and basically just hoped they wouldn’t use him for any experiments until he could put his plan into action and have the HPSC’s people break in and find and revive him?? WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG. A FOOLPROOF PLAN IF I’VE EVER HEARD ONE

fff this man really asked Jeanist to risk it all to prop up his little cover story, and Jeanist was all “sure why not” omfg. anyways, thanks for recapping all of this out loud for no particular reason in your car conversation you two

LMAO NOW WHAT

TROUBLE YOU SAY? GOOD THING THE NEW NUMBER ONE HERO IS ON THE JOB THEN

okay no it’s just some random thugs strolling around terrorizing the downtown. fuck ‘em. so Jeanist is making short work of them now

uh oh

won’t come? not can’t, but won’t?? what???

WOW

well I guess that makes the local heroes A BUNCH OF SHITHEADS now doesn’t it?? jesus

and okay, serious question, if the cops are spread too thin and the heroes have literally walked out on the job, what exactly is stopping everyone from deciding to use their quirks to defend themselves, legal or not? nothing, as far as I can tell. society just got a hell of a lot more chaotic

anyway so this is an interesting panel here

man, Dabi really did pull it off, didn’t he. well anyway so here’s that better world all of the villains were wanting, you guys! isn’t it so great?? everyone’s terrified and angry and losing hope and society is inches away from collapsing into total anarchy! but hey, at least we exposed the number one hero as a hypocrite

anyway so what are these guys up to

fucking hell, he’s visiting his mom. I really wasn’t prepared to commit this much emotional energy towards reading this chapter today. BUT VERY WELL, WE PRESS ON

?? wait she’s not there?

is this supposed to explain how Dabi knew who Hawks really was? except that there’s the little matter of how he even know where to find his mother in the first place. feels like we’re still missing something there, but oh well

OH MY GOD

RHA I TAKE BACK EVERY WORD I EVER SPOKE AGAINST YOU. YOU ARE A SCANLATION GROUP FILLED WITH ANGELS LMAO. I WILL TAKE THIS PANEL IN MY HANDS, AND TREASURE IT AND KEEP IT SAFE

ANYWAY, BECAUSE MY TIRED BIRD SON’S LIFE SUCKED SO MUCH ALREADY, IT TURNS OUT HE’S ACTUALLY PLEASED WITH THIS NEW TURN OF EVENTS LOL HOW ABOUT THAT

GOOD FOR YOU BBY. YOU GO OUT THERE AND BE YOUR OWN PERSON

and in all seriousness, I love that identity he chooses -- chooses, because it actually is him making a choice now, possibly for the very first time in his life -- is “guy who helps people”, though. it really is nothing short of miraculous that he held on to that kind of optimism and desire to do good even with everything he’s been through. there were so many times he could have chosen to turn his back on the world in retaliation for the way it treated him. but he didn’t!! and here he is now, finally free, and what he wants to do with the rest of his life now is simply to help others. anyway please excuse me for a moment, I need to go find some sort of basket or a big vase to put all of my fresh new Hawks Feels in, pardonne-moi

YEAH BOIIIIII

“FIRST ORDER OF BUSINESS, MISTER JEANIST, WHERE DID YOU FIND YOUSELF THAT SWEETASS CAR.” hey, all I’m saying is if this boy’s wings really aren’t growing back, he’s gonna need to find himself a new means of transportation y’know?

oh my god you guys it’s a flashback to his mom buying him the Endeavor plushie when he was like two because, and I quote, ALL MIGHT WAS TOO EXPENSIVE

oh my god oh my god. my boy out here with a new lease on life finding hope in the darkest of times

wasn’t your throat supposed to be all fucked up lmao. Horikoshi was suddenly all “oh shit the VAs are gonna be pissed at me if I keep this up huh”

“that’s why Bubaigawara was such a great guy” motherfucker IT IS A TERRIBLE DAY FOR RAIN. FORECAST SAID NOTHING ABOUT THIS

:’)

yes ma’am. yes indeed. confirmed, I really will straight up fight some motherfuckers for this child. well not really, but YOU KEEP YOUR DISCOURSE OFF MY LAWN AND OUT OF MY BLOG YOU HEAR. THIS IS A HAWKS-FRIENDLY SPACE. WE RESPECT TAKAMI KEIGO IN THESE STREETS

and he’s saying (or is he thinking?? what a weirdly shaped speech bubble this is) that even if what Dabi said about the Todoroki household is true, “I’m not sure it’s the same now.” which happens to be ABSOLUTELY CORRECT. man this whole chapter really is all about saying “fuck the past” and moving forward and I am living for it

SON!!!!

“the first step is at my beginning” fklkjlk. what an iconic fucking line??

AND HIS WINGS!!!! THEY ACTUALLY ARE GROWING BACK AHHHHHHH. “PUT A RAINCHECK ON THAT CAR, JEANIST-SAN.” THE HAWKSMOBILE CAN WAIT, RIGHT NOW HE HAS TO GO INSERT HIMSELF BACK INTO THE TODODRAMA WHETHER THEY LIKE IT OR NOT

you guys. I came here ready for some BAKUDEKU HOSPITAL ANGST, and I got DIDDLY SHIT of that, and none of my other kids were even in this chapter, but!!! ASK ME IF I CARE LMAO omg. because bird son is hanging with his new best friend, and he’s out here Finding Himself and picking up the pieces and putting them back together stronger than ever because RESILIENCE HAS A NAME, AND IT’S SPELLED H-A-W-K-S, and you guys. profound, my love for this child. holy shit. hey google, play Silence by Marshmello