#hell let’s ask zac!

[cementcornfield]

I can't tell if jamarr exaggerates his stories to an extreme amount or if joe justhas to constantly tell him to chill haha. but based on tee confirming that jamarr does buy joe clothes ocassionally and he did buy him a chain - im going to say joe just likes privacy lol

ALWAYS THRILLED TO BE ASKED ABOUT UNRELIABLE NARRATOR JA’MARR!!!

more under the cut because literally i could talk about this all day and i don’t need to subject anyone to that. 

Honestly I think it’s a combination of both? Ja’Marr exaggerates, says one thing then immediately another contradicting thing, doesn’t seem to have much of a filter, however you want to categorize it. Which I think is such a funny contrast to Joe - who is (almost) always very careful about how he expresses himself and how he wants to be portrayed. 

The “Ja’Marr Buys Joe Clothes Except No He Doesn’t Except Wait He Definitely Does” saga is probably my favorite thing in the world because what on earth is ANYONE talking about in this situation. Like, first Ja’Marr claims in the GQ interview:

"Joe literally won’t buy his own clothes. He always asks me to shop for him and drop it off at the house.” 

Which is almost definitely an exaggeration. I am sure Joe buys plenty of his own clothes (although loving the idea of Ja’Marr literally filling Joe’s closet with things he thinks he’ll like). 

And then, bringing it up completely unprompted in an interview a week later he says that actually that was “kinda” a lie, and that he hasn’t bought Joe anything but dinner - although now he’ll “have to [buy joe clothes] since that’s out now”. like ?????? First of all just because you “kinda lied” about buying Joe clothes does not mean that you now have to actually buy him clothes? And why did you lie about it in the first place? How badly do you want to buy this man clothes??? 🤨🤨🤨

So we spent the rest of the season completely confused about this story but just kind of accepting that Ja’Marr just says shit sometimes, who knows… and THEN in a groundbreaking (to me) interview with Tee, we learn that actually Ja’Marr has in fact bought Joe clothes: 

“Chase definitely gets Joe right. I’ve seen him buy clothes for Joe multiple times.” 

MULTIPLE TIMES??? and Tee has seen it for himself?? Which at this point means that Ja’Marr has now potentially lied about lying about buying Joe clothes?? For what purpose??? 

I have imagined and talked with beloved mutuals about what could be going on in this situation, presented here with varying levels of realism and hilarity: 

Ja’Marr has never bought Joe clothes and all the receivers are in on a big joke where they’re claiming that Ja’Marr buys Joe clothes just to fuck with him. Because it’s funny and why not.

Ja’Marr hadn’t bought Joe clothes before the interview, but had been planning on doing it and was so excited by the idea that he got ahead of himself and told GQ he was already doing it. And then “since it was out there” he had an excuse to start buying Joe clothes, with Tee as a witness. 

Finally back to the point of your ask (so sorry for all my rambling) and probably the most likely scenario - Ja’Marr tends to exaggerate and Joe tends to value his privacy. 

What I imagine is this, Ja’Marr has probably bought Joe clothes a few times. We already know that he’s bought him grills and he mentioned in a few interviews last season that he had bought Joe some pants. And probably a few more instances we don’t have details on. The man likes fashion and he likes Joe and it seems like he has a gift giving love language! He probably got excited and exaggerated a bit in the GQ interview because again, I’m sure Joe does not “always” ask Ja’Marr to shop for him lmao. And I wonder if the exaggeration is the part that Joe took exception to (if he even did! Joe’s never said anything about any of this! all we have is Ja’Marr’s word which we can NOT trust) - Joe likely doesn’t want the whole world thinking Ja’Marr buys ALL his clothes, he likes fashion too and I’m sure puts a lot of work into those game day outfits, even if Ja’Marr does help out sometimes. Plus he really doesn’t like sharing details about his relationships, even one as public as his friendship with Ja’Marr. (All he says is that he’s one of his best friends and they hang out all the time, Ja’Marr is the one giving details about UFC moves and going to Vegas together and keeping his stuff at his place etc etc). 

Joe likely gave Ja’Marr shit for how he phrased it and honestly sharing it with the world at all. Plus!!! I am always thinking about the timing of the article, coming out right when Joe’s appendix burst. I bet Ja’Marr was worried about his friend, felt bad about sharing some exaggerated details of their relationship, and simply decided to take ALL of it back. Because again, he really seems to only operate in extremes. So to make Joe feel better, instead of just clarifying his quote, he just decided to say ‘nope, sorry, that was a lie, never bought that man clothes in my life 😊' while Tee was probably at his locker listening to the interview like 🤨???

Anyway. that’s WAY TOO MANY words to answer your ask but please know I so appreciated getting it. Any excuse to ramble about these two as you can see!! 

[shiorimakibawrites]

Matt Murdock / Daredevil Masterlist

Image Credit: kissmegoodbye.net

Welcome to the masterlist for my Matt Murdock aka Daredevil fics. My general masterlist is here.

Posted fics can also be found on A03.

Please let me know if any links are broken or if you wish to be added to the tag lists.

Last Updated: 7/16/2024

Matt Murdock x Fem! Reader Series

Image Credits: kissthemgoodbye.net / Amber Kipp / Nathan Dumlao

Alley Cat {Installment List}

You are a paralegal (and trouble magnet) with an escape artist cat who keeps encountering Daredevil. You start falling in love. Both with the Devil of Hell's Kitchen and the man behind the mask. {18+}

Ongoing Series

Tags: Fluff, Romance, Orange Cat Shenanigans, Legal Drama, Legal Nerd Stuff Warnings: Canon-typical violence, explicit sexual content, police corruption, workplace harassment

Image Credits: kissthemgoodbye.net / Taelynn Christopher (Unsplash) / Anna Kolosyuk (Unsplash)

Happy Little Accident {Installment List}

You are a klutz. You are pretty used to tripping over nothing and embarrassing yourself. But this time has to be the worst. Because this time, this time, you have gotten paint all over Matt Murdock. Your handsome neighbor that you have an enormous crush on. {18+}

Ongoing Series

Tags: Romance, Art, Female Gaze, Fluff Warnings: Canon-typical violence, eventual explicit sexual content, clumsiness

Image Credits: kissthemgoodbye.net / Greta Punch (Unsplash) / Stephanie Harvey (Unsplash)

Cozy Corners {Installment List}

Ongoing Series

You have a problem. You have feelings for two men. The first man is local defense attorney Matt Murdock. A regular at your cafe Cozy Corners, you've been pining over him since he first walked through your door. The second man is Daredevil. The vigilante who saved your life during a mugging and has appointed himself as your guardian angel.

Meanwhile Matt is wondering how he managed to get into a love triangle with himself. {18+}

Tags: Romance, Secret Identity Hijinks, Accidental Love Triangle Warnings: Canon-typical violence, eventual explicit sexual content, anxiety, panic attacks

Image Credits: kissthemgoodbye.net / Zac Ong (Unsplash) / Biswapati Acharya (Unsplash)

The Phantom {UPCOMING}

You are a ghost. Not literally but you might as well be. Your old life is dead. Because of them, you cannot make a new one. Then one day, in search of food and a shower, you enter an apartment and discover a dangerous secret - the identity of Daredevil. {18+}

Part One: Breaking and Entering {coming soon}

Tags: Slow Burn, Allies-to-Friends, Friends-to-Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, Angst Warnings: Canon-typical violence, eventual explicit sexual content, flashbacks to traumatic events (unwilling human experimentation, physical abuse, verbal abuse, medical abuse, threats of sexual violence, murder, threats of death)

Image Credits: kissthemgoodbye.net / Andre Benz (Unsplash) / Nicolas Picard (Unsplash)

Arachne {UPCOMING}

University is hard enough without developing superpowers. Too bad nobody asked you. You were just trying to study when you were bitten by a strange spider. Then things started to get weird. Fortunately, you aren't the only odd freshmen at Columbia University. {18+}

Part One: Metamorphosis {coming soon}

Tags: Slow Burn, Friends-to-Lovers, College Hijinks, Angst, Fluff, Superhero Adventures Warnings: Canon-typical violence, eventual explicit sexual content

Love is Blind {UPCOMING}

You are a blind attorney who has recently moved to New York from California after a very nasty break-up. It's a big change but with your trusty guide dog Luna, you figure that you can handle it. While exploring your new neighborhood, you meet local defense attorney Matt Murdock. And you hit it off right away. Unfortunately your past isn't willing to be left behind. {18+}

Part One: New York, New York {coming soon}

Tags: Romance, Fluff, Secret Identity Hijinks, Dogs, Drama, Disability Issues Warnings: Canon-typical violence, explicit sexual content, ableism, stalking, flashbacks to traumatic events (domestic violence)

The Bonds of Friendship {UPCOMING}

Book I: High School Blues {coming soon}

You are a teenager who has recently moved to New York City from Colorado with your family. While shopping for groceries, you meet a local teen - Matt Murdock who is at the store with his adoptive mother Anna Nelson. Becoming friends happens fast but the love that grows in your heart creeps up on you. Before you know it, you are in love with one of your best friends. {18+}

Inspired by the prompt from @importantnightwerewolf

Book II: University Days

Book III: Law School Confidential

Book IV: Vigilantes

Tags: Slow Burn Romance, Friends-to-Lovers, High School Drama, Teenagers Being Idiots, Families of Choice, College Hijinks, Fluff, Growing Up, Superhero Adventures Warnings: Canon-typical violence, eventual explicit sexual content, bullying, ableism, body image issues, adoption, reference character death, abandonment issues

Full of Surprises {UPCOMING}

You had been dating Matt Murdock, a fellow summer associate at Landman & Zack. But summer has come to an end and it is time for you both to return to your respective law schools. You go back to Massachusetts to start your final year and prepare for the bar exam. Only to discover that you are pregnant. {18+}

Part One: Our Last Night {coming soon}

Tags: Romance, Fluff, Parenthood, Original Child Characters, College Life Warnings: Canon-typical violence, explicit sexual content, unplanned pregnancy, pregnancy symptoms, childbirth, parenthood, law school stress

Sanctuary {UPCOMING}

You are a doctor with a rather unusual patient. John Doe is a badly injured blind man hidden in the basement in a local church. You have many questions but no one seems particularly interested in answering them. Complicating matters is that John Doe is very handsome. And when he wasn’t brooding or being sullen, he is rather sweet . . . {18+}

Part One: John Doe {coming soon}

Tags: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Mystery, Slow Burn Romance Warnings: Canon-typical violence, eventual explicit sexual content, injuries, medical inaccuracies, severe depression, grief, mourning, referenced attempted suicide, reckless behavior, anger, abandonment issues, referenced character deaths, disability struggles, internalized ableism, religious discussions, religious imagery

Keeping Secrets {UPCOMING}

Your new boss Matt Murdock is rather mysterious. He regularly shows up to work with poorly explained injuries. He isn’t speaking to his oldest friend. And a thousand other little things that all say Murdock is keeping secrets. Big secrets. But that’s okay. Because you have some big secrets of your own. Not least of which is your interview wasn’t the first time you had meet each other. Or who the father of your son Jack is . . . {18+}

Part One: Curious and Curiousier {coming soon}

Tags: Slow Burn Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Murder Mystery, Legal Drama, Secrets and Lies, Original Child Character Warnings: Canon-typical violence, explicit sexual content, referenced murder, secret child, religious trauma, flashbacks to traumatic events (domestic violence, sexual assault, child abuse)

Cat Man Do {Installment List}

Matt Murdock is having a bad night. He has been turned into a cat with a blizzard is coming in. Lucky for him, you came walking by. And you love cats. {18+}

Completed Series

Tags: Idiots In Love, Female Gaze, Animal Transformation, Cats, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Resolved Sexual Tension, Love Confessions Warnings: Canon-typical violence, swearing, involuntary magical transformation, referenced animal abuse (non-graphic), explicit sexual content

Freaky Friday {UPCOMING}

You are a journalist. One night when you are walking home, you stumble across Daredevil fighting. The criminal shouts something while throwing a beam of light at you. Daredevil shields you but it doesn't appear to do anything to you. Until you wake up the next morning not in your own body but Daredevil's. {18+}

Part One: Random Encounter {coming soon}

Tags: Body Swap, Secret Identity Hijinks, Strangers-to-Lovers, Fluff Warnings: Canon-typical violence, mild body dysmorphia, disability struggles, sensory issues, anxiety, panic attacks, possible explicit sexual content

A Romantic Cliche {UPCOMING}

It's a plot straight out of romance novel. You would know. You write them for a living. Your sister is getting married. Naturally, she wants you to come to New York and be her maid-of-honor. No one warned you that the best man was devastatingly handsome. But nothing could prepare you for the strength of your desire. Thankfully, this intense desire doesn't appear to be one-sided . . . {18+}

Part One: The Meet Cute {coming soon}

Tags: Strangers-to-Lovers, Wedding Hijinks, Fluff, Sexual Tension Warnings: Explicit Sexual Content

The Broken Hearts Club {UPCOMING}

It’s Valentine’s Day and you’ve been depressed all day. Granted, you’ve been feeling awful since That Day. Then your day got worse. You found the ring that your boyfriend had been planning to give you before that terrible day . . . You don’t know how or why your feet led you to Fogwell’s Gym nor why your fellow vigilante Daredevil was there. You just know that you started off sparing with each other and ended up having sex. Not for the last time. Soon the sex became a regular thing. But you weren’t worried about anything else changing between you . . . after all, it’s just sex, right? {18+}

Part One: The Ring {coming soon}

Tags: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Slow-Burn Romance, Superhero Adventures, Reluctant Allies-to-Lovers, Secret Identity Hijinks Warnings: Canon-typical violence, explicit sexual content, temporary character deaths, permanent character deaths, grief, mourning, unhealthy coping mechanisms, alcohol abuse

A Fragile Thing {UPCOMING}

You just discovered that you are pregnant. Before you can share this news with your husband Matt Murdock, he collapses and dissolves into dust. Along with half the world. You do your best to raise your daughter alone and not to give up hope that you might get your husband back . . . but that gets harder as each year passes . . . {18+}

Part One: The Most Happy {coming soon}

Tags: Angst, Eventual Comfort, Motherhood, Original Child Character, Holding Onto Hope, Male-Female Friendship, Female Friendship Warnings: Temporary Character Death, Grief, Mourning, Pregnancy, Pregnancy Symptoms, Single Parent, Parenthood, Nightmares, Explicit Sexual Content

One-Shots and Drabbles

Humor

Dicta (drabble): Matt and Foggy are studying for their law exams when juvenile humor ensues.

The Thing That Speaks For Itself (drabble): Matt names a cat.

Fluff

Will You Be Mine?: You have been nervous since Matt said he had something important to ask you.

Baking with Love: Matt and You make pumpkin bread and cookies. Matt Murdock x Reader. Written for Mandy’s Sweater Weather Challenge.

Stormy Weather: It was a dark and stormy night when Matt returns home with a surprising rescue. Matt Murdock x Reader. Written for Mandy’s Sweater Weather Challenge.

Cozy Sunday: On a quiet morning, you decide to surprise Matt. Written for 300 Follower Celebration.

Cookies: You are baking cookies when Matt comes home. Written for 300 Follower Celebration.

Hurt/Comfort

Flare Up: You wake up with an asthma flare up along with a cold. Matt takes care of you.

Smut

Older: Sometimes, it's the little things that hurt the most.

Can't Sleep: Matt can't get his brain to turn off.

Relax: After a long day, you try to relax in the shower.

Bound: You fulfill a fantasy with your husband. Sequel to Relax

Fan Art

The Duality of Man - Mixed media (alcohol markers, colored pencils), manga style

Reader POV - Mixed media (alcohol markers, colored pencils), manga style

Matt smiling - Pencil drawing, realistic style

[funnyjb]

Chapter 1

How you get the girl

…………………………………

“Alright boys, let’s go.”- Zac

The boys were doing warm ups before they started getting to work.

“Hey, dad!”- you

Coach Taylor turned around

“Hey, hon!”- Zac

He kissed you on the forehead and gave you a hug

“Are you working out here today?”- Zac

“Yeah, getting some content. I need to film and take pictures of the offense today.”- you

“Fun! Let me know if you need anything.”- Zac

“Will do!”- you

“Alright boys, hustle!”- Zac

And there he goes right back at it.

I stayed around for a bit getting some content. Taking pictures of the boys and filming there funny little jokes.

I was standing near the water table where the boys can get some refreshments when it was break time. Break time also means everyone go get water! So the once so quiet water table that was keeping me company turned into a place with loud and sweaty NFL players getting water.

“Hey, y/n! How have you been?”- Teddy k

“Hey, Ted! Been good! How’s the family?”- you

“Doing great!”- Teddy K

“Good!”- you

“Yo, y/n! How is the content coming along?”- Ja’Marr

“Great! Got some great pics! Want to see?”- you

“Hell yeah, I do!”- Ja’Marr

He came closer to me and looked over at my camera and I then showed him my phone that had some videos. One of the videos was Joe Burrow and Ja’Marr and Joe was sliming Ja’Marr

“Of course you got me getting slimed. Yo, Joey b, come check this out!”- Ja’Marr waved to Joe

Joe looked over at us and came walking over.

God he is Gorgeous.

“What’s up? Oh, Hey y/n!”- Joe

“Hi!”- you smiled

HI???? Why did I say it like that!

“Look at this video y/n got of us!”- Ja’Marr

He showed him the video.

“Wait, that’s awesome! Y/n, do you mind sending it to me?”- Joe

“Sure! I will send it as soon as I can.”- you

“Thanks!”- Joe

“Yeah, me too, please!” - Ja’Marr

“On it!”- you

————————————————————————

Practice was over and the team was heading back inside to wash up and head home. Me on the other hand is staying a little bit longer so I can get some more work done.

I was walking back through the halls when I heard someone call my name. It was Joe.

“Hey, y/n! Wait up!”- Joe

I stopped in my tracks

“Hey, Joe.”- you smile

“I was just wondering if you could send me some photos from today adding along with the video if you don’t mind?”- Joe

“Of course, it’s no problem.”- you

“Thanks.”- Joe

He started walking with me.

“So, how long have you been working for the Bengals?”- Joe

“Ever since last year. I was an intern for a while and then finally got the job when I graduated.”- you

“That’s cool. Where did you go to college?”- Joe

“Ohio state!”- you

“Really?! I went there!”- Joe

“Yeah, I know. Everyone always used to talk about you.”- you laugh

Joe laughs to

“How come I never saw you? We were the same grade.”- Joe

“I don’t know! I guess never crossed paths! But I did see you around.”- you

“Really?”- Joe

“Yeah, when you were at practice or walking with Sam.”- you

“Oh right! You knew Sam!”- Joe

“Yep!”- you

“Yeah..”- Joe rubbed his neck

“Can I ask you something?”- Joe

“Sure! You can ask me anything!”- you

“Would you like-”- Joe

“Hey, burrow! We need you for a press conference.”- bengals staff

“Oh um, ok.”- Joe

He waved at them to let them know he was coming.

“I will catch you later.” Joe smiled

“Yeah! See ya later, burrow.”- you smile

Joe blushes and turns to go to the conference.

I smile to myself thinking about that encounter I just had with Joe. I wonder what he wanted to ask me?

I later got back to my office and started sending pictures and videos to the players. I of course sent the videos and pictures to Ja’Marr and Joe too.

An hour later I got a notification from my phone. It was from instagram so o decided to open it. It says Joe burrow just posted.

joeyb_9 Stories

………………………………….

[mamaestapa]

Joe Seeks Advice & Comes Home to Something Nice…

•pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

•series summary: Y/N Y/L/N moved to Cincinnati, Ohio for a new start. Move in day arrives and she discovers something terrible...the apartment complex gave her the wrong lease. Instead of living with who she originally was supposed to, she's now living with the hottest quarterback in the NFL, Joe Burrow. Y/N is stuck living in the same apartment with him for a year...which the two are not thrilled about. However, as time goes on, they realize that maybe this wasn't the worst thing that could happen to them. Will Y/N and Joe stay enemies, or will they find themselves falling in love?

•chapter summary: Joe struggles as practice and seeks advice from his teammates, then he comes home to a nice surprise…

•word count: 2.8k

•warnings: language, mentions of sex, angst, suggestive content, uhhh kind of a cliffhanger? (not really though)

series masterlist

——————————————————

November 17, 2022

Joe's Pov:

"Burrow!" Coach Taylor snapped, "what the hell was that!?"

I let out a frustrated sigh, "Sorry coach."

"Don't be sorry, make the damn pass!"

"Yes sir." I mumbled as I re-adjusted my helmet.

I haven't been my best today at practice. I'm missing easy throws and not making plays that would win us the game—if this was a game, that is. I was growing frustrated with myself and I could tell Coach Taylor was too.

I dropped back to pass the ball, lofting it into the air and hoping it would be a complete pass.

"Shit," I mumbled under my breath. I overthrew Ja'Marr by mere inches. I watched as Coach Taylor dropped his hands to his knees and give me a look of disappointment. Coach Taylor blew his whistle and then groaned angrily. I think if I was any closer to him he would reach out and strangle me.

"Burrow! What is going on!?" He yelled, starting to walk towards me.

I took my helmet off with a sigh. I ran my free hand through my hair that was damp with sweat. I shook my head, "I've just got a lot on my mind."

Zac sighed and put a hand on my shoulder, "You alright Joe?" He asked lowly. That's one of the things I love about having Zac as a coach. Even if he was pissed off at me for missing throws, he always cared about how I was feeling. Zac was willing to help out all of his players and their families in any way he possibly could.

My lips formed in a straight line as I nodded. I can't tell him what's on my mind though.

He sighed and pat my shoulder, "Why don't you take a break. I'll run some defensive drills instead. You get some water, talk to the guys, do whatever you have to do to get out of your head, got it?"

I nodded, "Thank you coach." I smiled gratefully at him and grabbed my gatorade water bottle before jogging off the field. I heard Zac blow his whistle and shout out that they were going to be running defense for the rest of practice as I filled the bottle up.

"Whew," Tee whistled, leaning his arm on the large water jug, "you're havin' quite the day, man."

"That obvious, huh?"

Tee let out a laugh, "Yeah."

I closed the lid to my water bottle and walked over to the sidelines where Ja'Marr, Tyler, and Evan were standing around and watching practice. I let out a big sigh as I stopped next to Ja'Marr.

"What's got you in such a slump?" Ja'Marr asked, crossing his arms and looking over at me.

I shrugged, "Just got a lot on my mind, s'all."

Tyler and Evan nodded, while Tee narrowed his eyes at me.

"What?" I asked, giving him a confused look.

"Well what's on your mind?"

I shrugged again, "Nothing."

"Oh come on," Ja'Marr said, placing a hand on my shoulder, "Joe, man, its not nothin'."

"Yeah," Sam said, jogging over to us out of breath, "last time it was 'nothing', it really wasn't nothing." Logan followed behind him, his chest heaving from the workout Zac had just put them through.

It's true. The last time I said it was "nothing" when I had extremely rough practices like I was having today, I was going through a breakup. The guys gave me great advice while I was going through that, so I'm hopeful they'll be able to help me through my current situation.

"You mad cause you're not gettin' any?" Tee asked, making Ja'marr laugh.

"That's it for sure." He said, the two of them a giggling mess.

I rolled my eyes, "I get plenty, thank you. Unlike you two."

Tyler laughed, "Ja'Marr's alleged baby mamas say otherwise."

A choruses of "ooooo's" sounded out among our group.

"Nah man, you didn't have to go there." Ja'Marr said, shaking his head at everyone's reactions.

Tyler chuckled and punched Ja'Marrs arm, "You know i'm just jokin'. I said mama's, I should've just said mama."

"Oh my god."

Evan shook his head, "Okay, okay. Enough about Ja'Marr and his baby mamas."

"Thank you shooter."

Evan just nodded and gave Ja'Marr a closed lip smile. I fiddled with my thumbs before I sighed and spoke up.

"I need advice."

"What's up Joe?" Sam asked.

"Aren't you two supposed to be out on the field?" Tee asked, pointing between Sam and Logan.

Logan shrugged, "Yeah, but we've got a water break. Make this quick and Zac won't even notice we're gone."

Everyone turned their attention to me.

"It's about Y/n."

"Oooh, now you've got my attention." Ja'Marr smirked.

"Dear god." Sam breathed out. I rolled my eyes at Ja'Marr. He's my best friend but sometimes...he can get on my nerves. Ever since Y/n has been my roommate, Ja'Marr has been talking about her nonstop. Even when she was going out with Evan, Ja'Marr still talked about her.

Logan rolled his eyes too before turning to me.

"What is is about her?"

"I need advice."

Evan smiled, "We can try to help. I've got some experience with her."

Sam looked at Evan with wide eyes. Evan shook his head as a blush appeared on his cheeks.

"Not like that."

"Oh," said Sam, "I was about to say, when did that happen?"

Evan chuckled, "Yeah. Y/n and I never got there, we agreed we're better off as friends."

Logan smiled, "I'm glad y'all are on good terms."

"Me too." Evan said with a smile, "Now enough about Y/n and I. Joe," he gave me a look, urging me to continue.

I sighed, "I don't even know where to begin."

It's true. I don't know where to start because there is so much that I need advice about.

"About a week ago, I brought this girl over. We were, you know..."

Ja'Marr smirked, "Gettin' it on, hell yeah."

"Yeah..." I trailed off, "It was really good, but she looked just like Y/n. I let my thoughts wander and I accidentally called the girl Y/n."

"Oh."

"Yikes, Joey."

I sighed, "I know."

"You said Y/n’s name during sex!?" Ja'Marr asked, mouth gaped open and eyes wide in shock.

"Yeah, yeah I did."

"Damn Burrow."

"Hey, hey, it's fine." Sam said, "It's not a big deal that you wished it was her."

"I never said-."

"Oh but you implied," Tyler said, cutting me off. I rolled my eyes. I wanted advice about the situation, not to be chastised about it.

"I never implied-."

"Yes you did." Tee and Evan said in unison.

"You did say she looked just like Y/n-."

"And you said you let your thoughts wander, meaning-."

Everyone was cutting each other off and I was growing annoyed.

"Okay, fine! I did wish it was her!" I snapped, causing the guys to stop talking and some of my other teammates not involved in conversation to look over at me.

I continued, "I wanted nothing more than for her to be Y/n. All I could think about while I was on my date was Y/n. Hell, even when Y/n was on dates with Evan I wished she was on dates with me. I wanted to be the one she worked out with, I wanted to be the one she posted on her story. I want to be the one she thinks about late at night, and I want to be the one she smiles about anytime she talks to her friends. Y/n is always on my mind and when I'm at the apartment with her I'm the happiest I have ever been. She's kind and she's funny. She can be sassy, but her sweet side never fails to put a smile on my face. She is absolutely beautiful on the inside and outside, and I," I laughed airily, "I've never had these feelings before and I don't know what to do about them."

The guys looked at me with wide eyes and amused looks on their faces. Ja'Marr suddenly grinned and held his hands out to Tee.

"Pay up, bitch!"

"What the hell?!" Sam asked, a confused expression on his face.

Tee sighed and placed a twenty dollar bill into Ja'Marr's waiting hands.

Ja'Marr chuckled happily, "I knew it."

"Knew what?" I asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"That you," Ja'Marr pointed at me, "are in love with Y/n."

I felt my heart drop. In love? Yeah right. I'm not in love with her...am I?

I scoffed and crossed my arms, "I am not in love with her."

Evan smiled, "Joe, buddy, I think you are."

I rolled my eyes. Yeah my confession may sound like Im in love with her, but I promise I'm not! It's just a little crush.

"It's just a little crush guys."

Logan put his hand on my shoulder, "Joe," he said, a smile tugging at his lips, "I've been in love with my Macee for years. I know what love looks like and sounds like, and you my friend are in love.”

I sighed, my shoulders falling in defeat. They're right.

I am in love with Y/n.

"What do I do?"

"Ask her out?" Tyler suggested.

"Confess." Evan stated.

"Walk into the apartment shirtless, she can't resist you if you're naked." Ja'Marr winked.

"Marr, be serious just for once, please."

Ja'Marr threw his hands up, "I am being serious! It's true, no girl can resist him, trust."

All of just shook our heads at his suggestion. There's no way I'm doing that.

"You know," Logan began, "Macee and I were sort of in the same situation as you and Y/n are. We started off as friends and I always knew I loved her, but I didn't know how she felt. One day when we were hanging out alone, we talked for a bit and then I just kissed her. No warning, just smashed my lips against hers. She kissed back and the rest is history."

I smiled softly as he talked.

He continued, "You cant be afraid to make a move Joe."

Sam nodded, "Logan's right, you can't be afraid to make a move. If you don't make a move you're just going to be miserable man."

They're right. If I don't say something to her or act on my feelings soon, I'm just going to be miserable. Even if feelings aren't reciprocated, at least it'll be out in the open, right?

I nodded and smiled at the guys, "I appreciate the advice guys, thanks."

Logan nodded, "Of course. Good luck." He patted my shoulder before putting his helmet on and running back onto the field. Sam did the same.

I let out a sigh as I watched the defense finish up todays practice. I could only hope talking to Y/n about my feelings is as easy as Logan makes it sound.

~time skip~

I parked my Benz and went up to the apartment, ready to shower and get something to eat. Practice was extremely long today and I was just ready to relax on the cou-

Holy shit...

There she was. The girl that's been on my mind all day at practice. Sitting on the couch, eyes glued to the Tv. But it wasn't her watching Tv that made me lose concentration. No, it was that champagne pink silk nightgown she was wearing. I sucked in a breath, not realizing I was even holding it until Y/n snapped me out of my thoughts.

"Hey," she smiled softly, "how was practice?"

I swallowed thickly, "Uh," I shook my head slightly, trying to find words, "it was good."

It definitely was not good.

"That's good." Y/n said, standing from the couch. My eyes trailed down her body as she stretched. The nightgown fit her like a glove, making the curve of her hips and swell of her breasts pop. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her as she walked into the kitchen, hips swaying naturally with every step she took. Y/n looked absolutely stunning right now.

"Joe?"

My head snapped up and I blinked, face growing red as Y/n chuckled at me.

"You good?" She asked, placing her hands on her hips.

"Yeah," I let out a soft laugh, "I'm great."

God Joe, keep it together.

Y/n walked into the kitchen. I decided to follow her. She held up two frozen pizzas and turned to me as I stood in the entrance of the kitchen.

"Which one do you want?"

I shrugged, "Doesn't matter. Whichever one you want."

She put the boxes down and narrowed her blue eyes at me. She crossed her arms in front of her, holding them against her body. Her cleavage popping as her arms made contact with her body. I couldn't help but glance down as she stood in front of me. I know what you're thinking, but I cant help it, Y/n is so beautiful.

"Did something happen at practice?"

I shook my head no. Something did happen at practice. But she doesn't need to know that, not right now.

"Are you sure?" she asked, cocking her head to the side, "because you seem, I don't know, weird?"

I pushed my bottom lip out and kept a straight face as I said, "I'm good."

Y/n nodded and pulled her arms away, turning around so she could prepare the frozen pizza. I watched as she moved. She looked so graceful even though she was just making a frozen pizza. As she turned around to put the pizza in the oven, my eyes were drawn to the white lace that lined the neckline of the nightgown. My mind ran wild seeing her in it. I could feel myself growing more and more aroused as the thoughts came into my head.

Oh god, not now.

I felt a blush creep up my neck as Y/n started making her way over to where I was standing. I immediately covered my lower half with my duffel bag. She squeezed past me and threw the pizza box away, her hip brushing against my thigh as she walked by me. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

Thank god the guys aren't here right now...I would NEVER hear the end of it.

I walked into the kitchen, dropping my duffel bag and grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge. I decided to get a cup and fill it with ice. Y/n was standing by the cabinet that had the cups in it. I sighed and made my way over to the cabinet, careful not to hit her as I reached for a cup. Just as I grabbed the cup, Y/n turned around. 

Both of our breaths hitched, Y/n’s mouth hung open slightly as her eyes momentarily fell to my lips before snapping back up to stare into my eyes. We stared at each other intensely, so many unspoken words shared between us just by the look in our eyes. You could feel the tension between us as neither of us dared to make a move.

Just kiss her Joe, man up and DO IT. Do what Logan said, just make the move...

Our bodies were inches from each other, if one of us just moved slightly, they'd be touching. I watched as Y/n took a deep breath before she began to lean in, I doing the same. With our faces inches away from eachother, she closed her eyes-

BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

Y/n snapped her eyes open and the two of us backed away from each other. I cleared my throat and Y/n let out a breath, smoothing her night gown before she got the pizza out the oven.

"Sorry," she breathed out, "I uh-."

"I'm going to shower." I said, my lips forming in a straight line.

She nodded, "I'm going to call Macee back."

With that the two of us left the kitchen and went out separate ways. I locked the bathroom door behind me and let out a deep sigh. I ran my fingers through my hair and then dragged my hands down my face.

I had a chance and I didn't take it.

Who knows if I'll ever get a chance like that again.

I smiled to myself though as I thought about a bright side to the situation. I don't know if it's just me, but, it seemed like Y/n wanted to kiss me just as much as I wanted to kiss her.

hey loves!!

joe finally being honest about his feelings?😱 we love to see it

i am SO sorry that this chapter has taken me so long to finish!! i've had a lot going on lately and i just haven't had much time to write. this chapter was very underwhelming and not great, so i deeply apologize for that. BUT i promise the next one will be much better :)

these next few chapters are going to be an emotional roller coaster so GET READY

i hope you're all doing well and thank you again for all of the love and support you've all shown me on this book. it means the world to me🤍

tags:

@jackharloww @ilovejoeburroww @dandelionwrites8 @ijustcrypretty @sinners-98-world @a-moment-captured @stainednailpolishremover @spookystoner @xoxokiaraaxoxo

[18catsreading]

Ally: my acrobatics is negative three

Brennan: oh no no no. Oh no no no. We liked to ask Brennan for cool things. [Forcing Ally to go through with their ribbon dance shenanigans]

All chanting: jump jump jump jump jump

17 -3= 14

Brennan: so you leap out the window. Now, I want Ally to look at me. And you tell me, do you feel like a 14 is a high enough roll for your character to use a dance ribbon to fly? Bearing in mind that if I say yes now I have to say yes every other time you want to do this.

Ally: yea, definitely. I think 14 it's above average, um.

Brennan: don't pay any attention to this noise [so many dice rattling]

Murph: you guys just see the most insane things. See Kristen just go like this [mimics ribbon dancing]

Ally: I'm not trying to like FLY

Brennan: sure you're just trying to descend.

Ally: I'm just trying to like, I'm trying to grapple. It's like a grappling hook

Zac: how many stories is it?

Lou: it's 10

Zac: it's 10 stories?!

Ally: It's o-- is it 10 stories? [Surprised]

Brennan: it's 10 stories

Ally: ok I'm just trying to grapple hook. [Interrupted by Lou's laughing] I'm trying to grapple hook 3 flights down so I can cut off her dad

Zac: yeah, that kind of precision.

Brennan: okay cool. So you're just going to try to nail this. You're going to try to cap this graceful fall at 10 stories

Ally: no, do you understand, like, I'm jumping with the ribbon dancer like this [drawing diagrams in the air] you know, to fly.

Brennan: sure, cool [pulling out the box of doom]

Ally: you know, I don't know if you understand. It's like to fly [vogueing a new diagram]

Brennan: okay, so yea, you're just going to try to go a quick three stories down using a ribbon dance to do that. An ability nowhere on your character sheet.

Ally: the ribbon dancer is written on my character sheet! [Pulling out character sheet]

Brennan nods encouragingly

Murph: you have four dexterity

Brennan: so, here's the thing, I'm going to allow you to avert this because I don't want anyone to say I was cruel or mean or unfair, right? So all I'm gonna ask is this: hit a 14 acrobatics check for me right now. Box of doom.

Ally: another one?!

Brennan: yea, to just, to like Indiana Jones using a ribbon as a bullwhip.

Ally: yea. See. You let Indiana Jones do it, and that's sexist. no one respects femininity in this country. [Rolls the dice in the box of doom, ally's it right on out the side]

Brennan: you Ally'd out of the box of doom, across my lap.

Ally: rolls again.

Brennan: okay, that's a natural 2.

Ally: interesting.

In chorus: so that's a negative one

Emily: I didn't - I really thought this was gonna be one of those crazy Ally moments.

Lou: I didn't want to say it --

Ally: we don't know what the first one landed on though

Siobhan: that's true. The first one is cannon

Brennan: here's your die back

Ally: thank you

Brennan: what happens is this. Kristen, you were like, I have to got to get to the first floor before Angwyn.

Ally: here we go

Brennan: I have great news. You make it to the first floor waaaay before Angwyn does, right? And the reason for that --

Ally: why is that?

Brennan: 16, 23 -- you take --

Ally: can we say the ribbon wraps around me and makes sort of a cushion

Brennan: here is what we are going to say. Kristen to get to the first floor, you take your ribbon, twirl, leap out the window, and take 36 points of damage as you --

Ally: hell yea

Siobhan: absolutely worth it

Brennan: ah! Ah! Ah! And you fucking land on your leg and roll and snap your ankle.

Ally: all right. I do have three points left.

[praetoravila]

can i have this dance?

a/n: this drabble takes place during big time dance! for context, instead of logan trying to ask camille out the entire episode, he tries to ask olive out but she's too busy with the planning of her quinceañera which is the same night as the dance. she's a lil disappointed that the boys can't come bc of them being on the dance committee but the biggest disappointment comes from her parents. @ceruleanmusings is to blame for this drabble somehow growing legs and turning into a proper ficlet. oh! and olive’s dress is the one that sarach cushing wears in the quinceañera episode of superman and lois. hope you all enjoy!

taglist: @raging-violets @myloveforhergoeson @ceruleanmusings @nolanhollogay @bibaybe @daughter-of-melpomene @selangkir @happinessismagicc @joshdiaz

the dance was in full swing when olive showed up. it was a little bit after 9:30pm, and she waved wren's concerned looks off as she made her way into rocque records, her extravagant ball gown dragging on the floor.

so what her quinceañera had sucked? so what her parents hadn't show up?

again.

it was totally, completely fine. she didn't need them or some stupid party to signify her turning 15. she could focus on prom instead and find her friends and have fun for the first time this night.

she stumbled through the hallway, passing by james and kendall who were bickering about something while jo watched on, a soft smile on the blonde's face. carlos was dancing with the jennifers and olive bit back a laugh at how ridiculous he looked.

finally she entered the big ballroom, where most of their classmates were. she scanned her eyes over the crowd of excited students before she found the one she was looking for.

logan was standing by the punch bowl, dressed in a simple black suit. his hair was spiked up with more product than usual. he looked cute. hell. he looked hot, leaning against the wall like that.

"hey." olive said as she walked up to him. logan's eyes bugged out of his head as he took her look in. "whoa."

"yeah. wren insisted that i get all dressed up for my quinceañera. it was stupid. i didn't even end up staying." she shook her head, the loose strands of hair falling in her face.

logan tucked one strand behind her ear. "i'm sorry we couldn't be there." he said quietly, and olive shrugged. "wasn't worth it anyways. rafael and mara didn't show up."

logan frowned at olive's causal use of her parents first names. "really?"

"yeah. i'm used to the disappointment though. it sucked that i didn't get the chance to dance at all." she said, looking down at her feet.

she was still wearing the heels that wren had practically forced her into. logan's body shifted closer to her, and she looked up at him, the sudden realization that with her heels on, she fit perfectly under his chin.

"well since you didn't get to dance at your quinceañera, can i have this dance olive pasqualina?" as if on cue, the music changed from an upbeat pop song to a soft ballad that olive remembered from the third high school musical movie that she had watched a few years ago.

"take my hand, take a breath pull me close and take one step..."

olive bit down on her lip as she nodded, letting logan grab one hand and place it on his shoulder, the other grabbing his fingers and intertwining them with hers. his left hand ended up on her hip.

slowly, they began spinning around towards the centre of the dance floor, ignoring everyone else around them, unsure but steady. she stumbled for a second and logan caught her, their chests flushed against each other. she looked up, her heart pounding.

"it's one in a million the chances of feeling the way we do and with every step together we just keep on getting better so can i have this dance?"

zac efron and vanessa hudgens crooned in the background as olive felt time slow down as logan leaned down to kiss her.

it wasn't the kind of kiss you saw in movies. it was slightly awkward from the angle that she had to crane her neck, and logan's lips were chapped and rough and jesus did he smell like 'cuda cologne - winter's edge her brain supplied, remembering it from one of james' many useless rants, but it was a first kiss.

it was a pretty damn good one if olive thought so herself.

they pulled apart, and olive's stomach flipped with butterflies inside. it was ridiculous she thought to herself. logan looked equally as shocked.

"we just kissed." he said matter of factly, like he couldn't quite believe it.

“was that your first kiss?” olive asked, and the blush on logan’s face told her everything she needed to know. the brunette boy nodded slowly, and olive could feel those stupid butterflies rising again.

“it was a good one.” logan said with a soft smile. “i’d be willing to have you be my second. if you are?”

she could feel her face becoming equally as red as she shifted closer again.

“yeah. i am.”

logan’s fingers gently grasped her jaw as he leaned in, and olive breathed in his cologne as she lost herself to the feeling of his lips against hers again.

maybe her quinceañera hadn’t been a total bust.

[verosvault]

🚨SPOILERS FOR FANTASY HIGH JUNIOR YEAR EPISODE 8🚨

Dimension20 "Fantasy High Junior Year"

Episode 8 "Fracas at the Frostyfaire Folk Festival"

Timestamp: 25:30

Video Length: 4min. & 32sec.

Gorgug and his parents talk about the Frostyfaire Folk Festival (Pt. 1 | ‣Pt. 2)

Brennan: "You start getting texts from friends that there's stuff happening over at Mordred."

Gorgug: "Adaine threw up?" 😂

Brennan: "What the hell? As you're heading out, by the way, Wilma says,"

Wilma: "Gorgug, would you mind? There's some stuff under the tarps that we'd love to move into the basement."

Brennan: "You see Digby goes,"

Digby: "Wilma, we'll move that stuff. That's okay."

Brennan: "You see he says,"

Digby: "We just, you know, just to let you know, bud, you know, you were gone for a couple months, and we had some friends over while you were gone."

Emily: *whispers* "Swingers." 😭✋

Ally: *laughs* 😂💀

Digby: "For a while, over the summer. And we were working on some projects, and we had some gear."

Emily: *whispers* "Swingers." 😭💀

Digby: "And we had some gear around the tree."

Siobhan: "Sex swing."

Digby: "And so- But we're gonna have a lot of guests and strangers and people around, so we're just gonna throw all that in the cellar. I just want you to know that you're okay to invite frie- we're not gonna embarrass you, we're not gonna, you know, put you in a weird... But just, there's some gizmos and gadgeroos that gotta get put in the ol' basement-eroonie."

Gorgug: "But you guys got that, right?"

Digby: "Yeah, we're gonna take- yeah"

Gorgug: "I don't have to go... I don't have to help with that, right?"

(BRENNAN'S SMILE HERE! 😭✋)

Brennan: "You see Wilma says,"

Wilma: *shakes head* "And I shouldn't have asked. I was thinking- I'm just-"

Gorgug: "Are they here?" 😭✋

Wilma: "I'm just stressed."

Gorgug: "Are those friends gonna be at this festival?"

(THE PAUSE HERE! 😭✋)

Wilma: "There's gonna... I wanna say-"

Gorgug: "What the **** are we doing?" 😭✋

Wilma: "No! No, no!" 😭✋

Brennan: "You see he goes,"

Gorgug: "Sorry, I just-"

Gorbag: "Whoa, whoa!"

Brennan: "And you see Gorbag says,"

Gorbag: "Gorgug, it's not a weird- look-"

Zac: "Gorgug's eyes are darting between my biological parents and-"

Brennan: "Biological parents and your... You see Gorbag goes,"

Gorbag: "Look, all the stuff they're talking about, that's not what the festival is about. Look, the festival celebrates bodies, you know? There's a nudity tent, but that's not sexual. That's just about admiring each other."

Gorgug: "So I'm just, like, having to study a lot lately." 😭😭

(😭✋ Brennan's laughter here!!! 😭✋)

Gorgug: "And I'm not sure that I'm equipped for this conversation right now."

Digby: "Listen, bud, you don't have to go in the nudity tent."

Gorgug: "I know! I know I don't!"

Digby: "Okay, but again, it's non-sexual. It's just about a place to be free-"

Gorgug: "There's just a tent where people are nude."

Digby: *shrugs* 😭✋

Gorgug: "Just sitting in a hot tent together."

Digby: "Well, the music's playing and it's just a place to fe-... You know, we live in a pretty stifling society, in a lot of ways, and there's nothing-"

Gorgug: "And they feel free in a big tent."

Digby: "Yeah, because we wanna be cognizant of people's boundaries."

Gorgug: "Okay."

Digby: "But, you know, clothing... I didn't sign a contract when I was born saying I'd wear clothes forever. There's nothing wrong with a body. What does any one of us have that no one's ever seen before?"

Gorgug: "That's true. I guess I just didn't really think that much about what this festival was."

Digby: "It's great. Music's great." 😭😭

Gorgug: "So, I guess my friends are coming, too."

Brennan: "As they sort of talk about all that, you get ready to head out. Give me a Tinkers' Tools check on your way out."

Zac: *blows on his dice* 😭✋

Lou: "There it is." 😭✋

Ally: "Get the bad ones out." 😭✋

Lou: "Get the bad ones out." 😭✋

Emily: "Oh, that was close to a 20." 😭😭

Zac: "21."

Emily: "This dice has been performing."

Brennan: "I think as you're walking out, thinking about that different approach, you're looking at all the junk tied up under different tarps and stuff in the yard. I think you just come to a moment of looking at some of the machinery and thinking about Henry, your artificer teacher, talking about how he's never seen anyone work at a problem before as hard as you are working and not solve it. And I think you're thinking about the disparity between rage and concentration and just looking at some machinery on your way out, and there's some little glimmer of an edge of inspiration in your mind, almost something you could catch onto, after this first semester of how well everything's been working. And you see circuitry carrying electricity through the tree. And just for a moment, see that current like a pulse, and think about your own pulse as you're raging. There's a moment where you see some kind of synchronicity there, and then it goes away and the day continues."

Zac: "Just writes down a little note to himself and crumples it up with rage, but then straightens it out and puts it in his pocket." 🥺🥺

Brennan: "Hell yeah."

[fillingthescrapbook]

Let's Talk About: Fantasy High Junior Year and Ragenarok (Part 1)

I shouldn't have watched the teaser for next week's episode prior to writing this because-- Well, now I'm even more pumped for the finale and my thoughts for this episode were already very jumbled to begin with--

But begin we shall!

"Fabian, is there anywhere you want to live?" is a hell of a line at the start of the episode--especially with the context of a Bad Kid needing to steer the fall of Fabian's house to anywhere in Elmville.

Lou and Emily going all in on a bit in the background while Ally, Murph, and Brennan were figuring out the logistics of something was funny as heck. Ally really has gone far from the Freshman Year where the allure of a bit would have certainly derailed them from the more serious figuring-out-the-stuff talk with button-up boys.

But the most important revelation this episode? SQUEEM HAS FINALLY REACHED ELMVILLE! They still have some distance to cover but they're here!

And, can I just say, Siobhan rolling quick for the group roll just before Murph could was clutch as fuck. I must admit though that I also felt sad that we missed out on a possible addition to the collection of "I have just as good a chance as any of you to roll good" bits. It did allow the Bad Kids enough time to squeeze in a short rest though, so, hats off to you, Siobhan!

Now, onto the battle itself:

A Rat Grinder going down QUICK got me in my suspicious era. Like, what is going on with these rat grinders? Why do they have such high level attacks and yet--

Oh, never mind. The others' HP are more robust.

Brennan clustering his bad guys is always funny to me. Especially when you see an Intrepid Hero fight the urge to moustache-twirl as they see Brennan unconsciously giving them an area of opportunity. And it happens twice this episode!

Zac--not Gorgug--being so angry at Mary Ann passing her saving throw was hilarious to me. Especially because another Intrepid Hero tried to stop her from saving--only for Mary Ann to be naturally resistant anyway.

Riz going full maniac, saying "make sure to cut his head off so he can't be revivified--" and then Murph pulling back… Murph, the actor that you are! Chef's kiss.

My absolute favorite part of the episode though was when Zac had to reroll a bunch of dice. Ally asked why, and Zac cited one of Gorgug's feats. Having Ally say "I thought we were honoring something" absolutely broke me.

It's funny to me how Kipperlily was created to be the foil of Riz--but she's not really Riz's nemesis. She's Murph's.

And I rejoiced when Brennan, pulling the Box of Doom out again, got a stern "put my partner down" from Ally. It's been a while since they returned to this bit. I thought they had forgotten their relationship.

With this season coming to a close… I have to say that it's really one of the most enjoyable seasons of Dimension 20 for me. Is it my favorite Intrepid Heroes season? I think A Starstruck Odyssey and the first season of The Unsleeping City are still fighting for the top spot… But Junior Year is definitely following those two.

Especially with Brennan finally gifting Ally with Ice Feast--not realizing the implications of said spell to his finale battlemap.

And lastly… the way Brennan said "reincarnate" at the top of the episode? Saying "re-ANKARNA-te Porter?" The yelp I yelped.

I can't believe the season ends next week.

[peonierose]

Top 10 Funny Moments 🩷 For @choicesfandomappreciation

I actually saw @aallotarenunelma post this and I thought this is genius, and so I’m going to share some funny moments from my stories 🤣

Summers Kiss

”I’m pretty sure there’s no magic involved in sex. It was pretty much watching my ovulation, waiting and peeing on test stripes to see the words pregnant. But if it makes you feel better B let’s call it the magic of our bed.“

”It was our bodies who created the magic, the bed was just a side piece.“

Cake by the Ocean

”What? I’m just saying. I can’t even say that I knew there was something going on? Way harsh dude,“ he says

Soraya gives him a pointed look

”I‘m not your dude,“ she says.

Aunt Joe clears her throat and they both shut up.

Bittersweet Symphony

”You’re my date, you shouldn’t have to do that.“ I say and lean on the kitchen counter next to her.

She snorts.

”Did you get stuck in the 18th century Sinclair?“ She teases me and I have to laugh at that.

Nightbound vs. Hänsel and Gretel - Chapter 2: Strange Encounters

“Pie-boy is getting roasted. I knew something was missing,“ Nik says grinning.

Hänsel cracks his knuckles.

“Bite me blondie,“ Hänsel says.

Niks grin widens and he just smiles at my brother.

“I’m afraid you’re not my type,“ he winks.

Neon Lights

”Get a room,“ Ethan and Aubrey say at the same time.

Bryce and I grin and share a smile.

”Is it just me? Or does anyone else think this is creepy?“ Elijah asks and I add.

”Me too. They’re almost the same person. Though Ethan is a bit grumpier, which makes him adorable,“ I say and Sienna nods in my direction.

”I thought I was the only one who thought so,“ she says and we fist-bump each other.

Ethan sighs deeply.

”Can we please just play? I don’t want to have front-row seats for Lahela's make-out session. I’m getting annoyed by this banter and about the fact that you’re trying to make it about me,“ he says his tone getting grumpy.

Bryce can’t resist adding.

”Oh come on man you’d learn a thing or two,“ B adds.

Ethan just sighs.

”If you’re talking about tips on how to make out? I’ll pass. Thanks though,“ Ethan replies.

Peppermint Kisses

“Buddy you picked the wrong nonna to pickpocket.“ I say and pull out my phone to dial Mafalda’s number.

“What’s a nonna dude? It’s not some weird fetish you guys have, is it? Because I don’t want any part of that.“ Zac stated.

“Nonna is the Italian word for grandmother you genius.“ I replied.

“Have you no manners? First, you steal and now you’re being a little punk?“ Trystan asks but Zac just rolls his eyes.

Girls Night Out - Chapter 3 - Streaking past your neighbors house

“I wish I had such good-looking strippers at my bachelorette party,“ Addi chimes in.

Both officers exchange looks, then turn to us again.

“You’re married ma’am?“ Officer Clarke asks, he looks more closely at Addi now.

“Well it’s complicated,“ Addi sighs

“I’m sure it is,“ Officer Clarke says his voice dripping with sarcasm.

“If we can’t have a lap dance, would you like one? So we can all forget about this little incident?“ I ask moving closer, but Sofia stops me with a hand on my arm.

“You are going to get us into trouble,“ Sofia mutters under her breath.

“And you are?“ Officer Kane turns to Sofia all mirth gone, replaced by a serious look on his face.

“Just an innocent bystander Sir. I was trying to help,“ Sofia stutters.

Home is where the heart is

”How’s the pregnancy going? Any weird food cravings that drive Bryce up the wall?“ he jokes and laughs.

”Does Bryce count as a food craving?“ I ask.

I am trying to act serious but I have to laugh at Ethan’s expression. He looks as if he bit into a lemon.

”I shouldn’t have asked,“ he mumbles.

Go Blonder

”Oh for fucks sake. Why in three hells are you only in your underwear Dr. Varma?“

Ethan’s voice. And he sounds super annoyed.

”I didn’t have any clean clothes,“ she says not wanting to admit she lost a bet.

He sighs

”You could’ve worn anything else. Please get something else to wear. This is just inappropriate,“ he says

”I can’t do that,“ she says.

He squints his eyes at her. Realizing there might be more to it.

”Clothes Varma. Now. And no that wasn’t a request,“ he says

Jackie laughs

”Aye aye sir,“ Jackie salutes and goes to get on some clothes.

You can see Ethan pinching the bridge of his nose and sighing.

”What kind of madhouse am I working at? I need a vacation,“ he mutters to himself. That’s when the video ends.

Go with the Flow

”Alright let’s go, before you turn into a popsicle,“ I laugh.

She just gives me the finger.

Which makes me laugh even harder and I have to stop and hold my stomach.

“So feisty today I like that side of yours,“ I kiss her fingers, which are ice cold.

[boston-babies]

Chris knocked on the door and sighed when he saw Tanner answer “oh fuck me” Tanner smirked “oh goodie, back for more verbal berating?” Chris rolled his eyes “I’m here to see my kids Tanner” she crossed her arms “you saw them on Thursday” he nodded “well that’s kinda how being a parent works. You see your kids every day or in my situation as often as you can. It’s a holiday weekend and I want to spend time with them.”

She smirked “you don’t live here anymore” he growled “it’s still my home with my wife Tanner, move”. She rolled her eyes and stepped aside but made one last snide comment “there’s a surprise in the kitchen for you”

Chris ignored her and walked past her and headed straight for the kitchen. Sitting at the table was Zac and Henry talking and having coffee but at the island he saw you and Tom sitting across from each other talking and you laughing at something Tom had said and Chris saw red “what the fuck?!”

Ryan had been wandering into the kitchen, texting on his phone, with his spoon from his yogurt earlier hanging from his mouth and looked up immediately after hearing his father. He slowly turned and started walking back. “Nope, not getting caught up in that” he muttered to himself.

You looked away from Tom and right at Chris “I thought you said you were coming around noon for the kids?” He shrugged “yeah well I decided to head over early. Why the fuck is he in my house?” You rolled your eyes “he stopped by to say hi and I asked him if he wanted to stay for breakfast” Chris put his hands on his hips “I told you I don’t want him around my kids”. Tom stood “he has a name you know-“ Chris snapped “you need to sit down and mind your fucking business” Tom walked closer to Chris “and what are you gonna do about it?”

Tanner ran in and sat next to Henry with a shit eating grin “oh good, I didn’t miss any of the good stuff”. Henry didn’t take his eyes off of the situation in front of him but still softly spoke to Tanner “sweetheart I think it’s best if you and y/n go to the den with the kids” Tanner saw his genuine concern and nodded. She walked over to you and pulled you away to the den.

Tom smirked in Chris face “this is good. Honestly because you keep pulling shit like this and I’ll be able to swoop in and take her from you with no issue. I can’t wait to wife her up and rub it right in your face. Especially if I can convince her to pop out a few more kids with me”

Zac and Henry stood as Chris lunged for Tom and rushed over to stand between Chris and Tom to prevent anything happening. Zac held his hand up “he’s not worth it man, let it go!” Henry held Tom back but looked back at Chris “Zac’s right Chris, don’t let him rile you up like this. It’s what he wants”

Chris took a deep breath and looked right at Tom “get the fuck out of my house and stay away from my family” Tom nodded “I don’t think I’m going anywhere Chrissy boy. See I let her get away once and I’m not about to do that again” Chris shook his head “Jesus fucking- you were sixteen years old! Move on! Besides, aren’t you married with kids of your own you jackass?”

Tom crossed his arms “yeah we were sixteen but I was in love with her-“ Chris cut him off “oh yeah well cheating on her is a great way to show her you love her” Tom snapped “you would know wouldn’t you? And it was a mistake! I tried getting her back then suddenly she met you and I didn’t exist anymore! But I knew eventually you’d fuck up and then I could make my move. Now I get a front row seat to blow up your life further” he laughed “oh man, I can’t wait to get your kids to hate you too. Can you imagine? They hate you so much that they start calling me dad? Damn” he laughed and Chris lunged again with Henry and Zac holding him back “you son of a bitch!”

You walked from the den to the kitchen to check in on the situation and your eyes widened when you saw the scene in front of you. “What the hell is going on here?!” Tom suddenly looked surprised “I have no idea, we were talking and he just lunged at me”

Chris pushed past Zac and Henry and stood between you and Tom “you’re going to stay away from her-“ you grabbed Chris’ shoulder “what the hell Chris?!” He shook his head and looked back at you “no pretty bird, I know how bad this looks but you have to trust me on this. You need to stay away from him” you shook your head “Chris-“ he turned and faced you fully “look I know I fucked up but I have no reason to lie to you about this”

You looked back and forth between Chris and Tom and chewed your bottom lip. After a moment you looked down but spoke quietly to Chris “the kids are ready to go, just make sure they’re back in time for dinner”. Hurt flashed across face “y/n..come on..” you looked up at him with hurt prominent in your eyes too “please Chris..just go”

After a beat, Ryan walked in again but this time he was holding Teddy and Brayden, Brandon, Will and Lily were behind him “wow, you can cut the tension in this room with a knife”. You wiped your eyes and walked over to the boys and gave them each a kiss “have fun with daddy today okay and be good please. Ryan I’m talking to you” Ryan feigned offense “I’m always well behaved mama”

Chris nodded and walked over to take Teddy from Ryan “I figured we could go to the aquarium for Teddy today then after we can do what ever you guys want to do then we can go get lunch” Brayden’s face lit up “oh can we go to ReelHouse for lunch?” Brandon shook his head “what is it with you and ReelHouse?” Brayden looked offended “uh are you kidding? they have the best food ever”

Chris nodded and let out a small laugh “yes Brady, we can go there for lunch” Brayden lifted his arms in excitement “yes!” Brandon facepalmed at Brayden and Chris shook his head in amusement “head out to the car guys, I’ll be out in a sec.” The kids said their goodbyes one last time and went outside. Chris readjusted Teddy in his arms and looked at you “can we please finish talking about this later?” You walked over and gave Teddy one last kiss and smiled at his giggle and looked up at Chris “you need to go now. You don’t want to keep the monsters waiting”

The hurt flashed in his eyes once more but he just nodded “I’ll have them back for dinner” and with that he left.

[say-hi-intrepid-heroes]

thank you for sending me all these asks! i have some for you as well!

d20 related:

favorite npcs from your top 5 favorite seasons

who's your favorite intrepid hero (if you can choose lol)

favorite non intrepid hero?

favorite pc from each intrepid hero

predictions for junior year?

any settings you would like to see d20 do?

favorite setting they've done so far?

favorite dm besides brennan?

least favorite npc?

a line that makes you emotional?

a funny moment you love

omg hell yeah i feel so honored

1.favorite npcs from your top 5 favorite seasons (its so hard to choose lol)

Fantasy High Sophomore Year: Ayda !!!! of course A Starstruck Odyssey: I really love the Junkmother, but also Plug ofc MisMag: that one professor who was all vibes and had the branches ACOFAF: jeremy renner theodore TUC: my girl ester or my guy dale. also pizza rat.

who's your favorite intrepid hero (if you can choose lol)

i love them all for different reasons, but as someone who is playing a circle of spores druid in a dnd campaign currently and is up to So Many Shenanigans and causing my dm to facepalm way more than usual, i gotta say my girl Emily Axford (but honestly this answer could change tomorrow)

favorite non intrepid hero?

erika. geese with the stats of velociraptors. (and all her other shenanigans, but that one is most notable)

favorite pc from each intrepid hero

Emily: a tie between Fig and Chirp, both so amazing Zac: Pib!! a little guy!! Siobhan: Imelda Pulse was too iconic to not make the list Lou: a tie between Kingston and Squak (i love the acofaf cousins, okay?) Ally: Pete Conlan! My wild magic tea-loving bookshop boy! Murph: Riz! My aroace private investigator!!

predictions for junior year?

Tracker and Kristen officially break up

something bad happens to Ayda

aroace riz content

at least one of Fig's parents perma-dies (and its probably Jawbone)

at least one of the bad kids starts using they/them pronouns (and lets be real its probably kristen)

any settings you would like to see d20 do?

would love to see a true pirate setting. I think they do so well with PoL and the ship battle in acoc, i would love to see a whole season of just that removed from everything else. also, classic fantasy would be fun. just chill, nothing else funky. kinda like DaDQ.

favorite setting they've done so far?

Starstruck definitely, or PoL. also, of course, ACOFAF.

favorite dm besides brennan?

aabria!!!

least favorite npc?

Dayne Blade. others are bad, but he's manipulative and a real asshole. fuck him.

a line that makes you emotional?

so so many. most recently tho, Conrad's speech to self loathing in Mentopolis.

a funny moment you love

Chungledown Bim is so funny every time. Also, when Gorgug thinks Jawbone is Tracker's dad, his voice on "nOoO. you're hER dad" is so funny, go rewatch it.

[jq37]

Twice Upon a Time - Neverafter Ep 2

Mirror, Mirror

What’s up y’all? A LOT has changed since the last episode and we have a lot to cover so I’m going to make the preamble short and jump right into the recap! Be warned that things do get a bit gnarly later on, but I’ll spare you the worst of the ick.

We pick back up at the campfire where the gang is circled up to eat as the caravan has stopped for the night. Tim Goose strikes up a conversation with Cole (the very jacked, former king of Jubilee) and asks him why he’s going to Shoeberg. Cole packs his pipe–unpracticed due to this usually being a servant's job (note: big ups to Zac because I asked the same question he did about why he was bad at pipe packing if he had so many of them) and says that he’s a bit directionless after the fall of his kingdom and is looking for hope and answers. It’s a  sentiment that resonates with the rest of the party.

Tim rolls Insight on Cole and Brennan says he feels a strange sense of familiarity with this man he hasn’t met before. He also says that when he started talking about his fiddlers, he almost heard something, but with the crowd and fire, it was hard to hear. Tim wants to peel away from the larger crowd and ask Cole more questions. As he does this, Brennan mentions two NPCs in the crowd: a teenage girl talking to the Red Hen (who we don’t get more info about) and a tall slender man with blue cloak and eyepatch (who we’ll get more info about in a bit).

When they talk privately, Cole *also* says that Tim feels familiar to him. Tim muses that it might be their mutual grief that he’s sensing and asks about his fiddlers that were lost defending the kingdom. Cole says they were the greatest in the land. His kingdom was small and tucked away so he’d been able to dodge the hardships of the troubled times for a long while but when it finally came, he couldn’t shake the feeling that things were different somehow. This tracks with Tim’s experiences during the Times of Shadow. 

Cole starts to talk wistfully about his fiddlers and, suddenly, Tim and Ger who’s close by hears muffled fiddle music. After a moment, Tim realizes that it’s coming from his book. When he opens it up, the music becomes un-muffled and everyone sees light pouring from the book (Brennan specifically mentions that the Red Hen and two mentioned NPCs look over and see this).

Cole looks at the motes of light pouring from the book and starts to weep. He seems to be seeing more than just light. Tim asks him to describe what he’s seeing and he says that he sees himself–not as he is now, ravaged by war. Fat and happy and prosperous. The faces of his fiddlers appear in the golden light. As he describes it, Tim is able to see the scene. Cole starts reciting the Old King Cole rhyme and Tim starts writing it down as quickly as he can.   

On a 21 Arcana check, Tim realizes that they are at a tipping point of something very old and magical and profound–not necessarily bad but def big. And he has to either let it happen or stop it. It’s Ally so of course they choose to let it happen.

Cole completes the rhymes and, for a moment, the fiddlers seem to become real. Cole looks fat and happy again. His fiddlers embrace him. And then, there’s a flash of light from the book and Cole and the fiddlers disappear. 

The caravan flips the hell out despite Tim’s attempts to calm everyone down. The Red Hen grabs the teen girl from earlier and starts to bolt, calling Tim a witch. Pinocchio and Roz work on securing Cole’s ram chariot so they have at least some sort of transportation. Puss lures one of the guards from Lord B’s shoe carriage and then slaps the horse’s flank so it will run off without him, just to cause problems. 

By the time the dust settles, the only one left is the man in the blue cloak who missed what happened but thinks it might be wise to follow the fleeing caravan. They intercept him and he introduces himself as Herr Drosselmeyer (who I will be calling Dross). They tell Dross that everyone left because of a super scary ostrich and he seems skeptical but willing to entertain them. He goes into the woods to investigate, leaving his carriage. 

[Note: Herr Drosselmeyer is, quite appropriately for the season, the uncle of the main character in the Nutcracker. He is a toymaker and the one who gives the titular Nutcracker to Clara, the main character.]

So of course, Puss immediately uses his cat claws to pick the lock and break in. He is surprised when he sees that it’s a Tardis, bigge- on-the-inside situation. There’s a whole-ass alpine manor home in there and the room he steps into is specifically a hallway lined with clocks. We’ll get back to that.

The rest of the group haven’t bolted like the rest of the caravan but they would like to know what the heck just happened. Pinocchio touches the book because he wants to see if his hand will go through in the same way that Cole was sucked in. Brennan has him roll a Charisma save–something you never wanna hear your DM as for when you’re poking around.

As he touches it, an etching appears of an island of toys. As he jerks his hand away it starts to fade, but slowly. He’s spooked but Red is intrigued. She touches it and on her Nat 1 save (she opts for Con instead of Cha).

She starts to involuntarily shift, filling with shame as she splits the seams of her clothes. The images on the open pages of the book are filled with the red etching of a girl in a glade, straying from the path as she picks flowers. Tim notices something moving in the trees of the image and hurriedly closes the book right as the snarling maw of a wolf tries to leap out of it. 

Red profusely apologizes as she shrinks back down to her normal height and goes to hide while Tim comforts her (obviously projecting a bit about his son as he does). Red feels shitty about the fact that when Pinocchio touched the book it was toys and when she did it, it was a wolf that tried to eat them but Pinocchio pipes up that the toy island was fun but not necessarily good. 

[Note: To anyone who hadn’t read/seen Pinocchio, he’s referring to the Pleasure Island bit of his story where kids are lured to a seemingly fun locale that eventually turns them into donkeys that are sold to be used for labor. It is basically always the freakiest part of any Pinocchio adaptation.]

Ger, who has been thinking this book might be the way to solve his cruse problems since he heard the fiddle music coming from it, takes his turn at slapping his hand on it and, as he does, his hand starts to turn pink and human again. But the pages of the book seem to be rotting and a weird, spherical indent is appearing in the pages. Red yelps that he’s trying to take from the book and Tim slams it shut, scared of breaking the magic somehow. Ger’s hand returns back to normal which is to say froggy-normal, much to his disappointment. 

Pinocchio is like, hey man. Maybe let’s slow down on all this book touching when you don’t really know what you're doing. Luckily, Roz has no desire to touch the book…until it’s mentioned that it might help her find her prince at which point she SLAMS her hand down as fast as she can. 

At first, vines and roses appear and, at the center, a portrait of an extremely handsome prince she doesn’t recognize, looking out lovingly from the pages. She’s so overjoyed she starts openly weeping. Then, the image glitches out and it flickers to the face of a still handsome but somewhat less handsome man. She rolls an 18 save and notices something strange happening with the image. Something different than what happened with the others. It’s almost as if some force is asking the roses and the portrait to move aside so it can show her something else. 

Roz just wants to stare at her hot, future-husband some more but the image fades and is replaced by the hurried sketch of an empty fireplace being made in charcoal. There is a woosh from the fireplace that shakes the trees in real life and a figure thuds into the fireplace. It’s a woman in glass armor who says, “Sister, you’re awake!” 

Tim immediately slams the book shut. 

[Note: Y’all know my ears prick the moment I hear the word “sister” is a D20 show so I was like Ally, noooooo even if it was a completely reasonable decision, lol.]

The group asks if Roz knows of a sister, but this is news to her as well. Tim gingerly opens the book again, trying to see if he can get a better look at the face of the woman and a gauntleted hand made out of paper reaches out and for his throat. He uses Silvery Barbs to make her re-roll her super high attack roll and manages to dodge and close the book. Maybe that’s enough screwing around for now. 

Now, let’s check in with what Puss is doing. 

Our favorite felonious feline rolls a Nat 20 investigation check and Brennan basically has to give him everything, starting with the fact that only one of the clocks in the hall is working and it has a weird little switch on it. When he flicks it, time stops so he has lots of time to leisurely look through the carriage/house. 

He notices the proportions of the carriage are somehow strange (Brennan likens it to a dollhouse. Maybe it’s a Wonderland thing? Not sure). 

In one room, Puss finds a room full of items collecting dust, most notably, a bigger object with a sheet thrown over it. As he enters the room, the temperature drops a bit. When he removes the sheet from the object, he sees that it’s a mirror, but it’s somewhat cloudy when he looks into it. He recognizes it as being from the kingdom of Tapestry which fell long ago and was full of dwarven craftsmen (a very clear sign of what fairytale is being invoked here, if the mirror wasn’t enough of a giveaway). 

A feline face appears in the mirror that resembles Puss but doesn’t follow his movements. The mirror makes Puss go through the whole “mirror mirror, leaned up against the wall” spiel before it will answer questions. 

Puss asks to see the kingdom of Marienne and the mirror obliges, showing the ruins of the kingdom. Puss is more emotional over this than he thought he’d be. He then asks the mirror for a suggestion for what to ask for and the mirror asks if he wants to be the fairest, the wisest, the most powerful? Puss says he really just wants to be the most comfortable. 

The mirror shows him an image of all the horrors of his world being swallowed into a book. Then, the book opens again and shows him a world with all the strife and ruin removed. And on the last page of the book is an image of him, dressed in the finest boots and super comfy. Puss recognizes the book in the image as Tim’s book and knows he has to investigate. 

The mirror asks for a favor of Puss–mention me to your puppet friend? Puss doesn’t *love* being told the terms of a bargain after the fact but agrees, not seeing the harm. Puss is about to leave when Brennan invokes the rule of 3’s and coaxes Puss into asking one last question. He’s already asked about the past and present. Why not ask about the future?

When he does, the mirror says that there is a road closed past the gates of Shoeberg where they’re headed. None who go there have come back since the Times of Shadow have fallen. The road is to Elegy–a kingdom that has fallen like most of the others. There is the first of many treasures that the book requires. That is their way forward, but it comes at a cost. But they must beware of the sisters of their new companion. 

And with that, Puss rejoins the group. They mutually fill each other in on what they’ve learned/talked about and then Dross shows up with an ostrich on a leash (literally never explained why he did this lol). They kinda sidestep what they’ve been doing/the snooping in his carriage and ask him what his deal is. He says he’s on the way to Shoeberg to look for magic items. Red asks for specifics and he says that he’s a mechanic and a magician and he’s looking for a clockwork creation of his that ran off.

Dross in turn asks about what happened with Cole and Tim is pretty cagey in his answer. Red sees that while Dross isn’t calling them out, he has clocked the book that Tim holds. 

Puss takes Pinnocchio off to the side and asks about what happened last episode when he went to talk to his mom/patron. Pinocchio brushes it off with a lie. Then, Puss informs him that the mirror wanted to talk to him. They mutually agree they should stick with the group because it’s easier than trying to grift people.

Back in the main conversation, Red asks Dross for full transparency and he obliges. The clockwork man he’s tracking down is someone he’d consider a godson and he’s out for some kind of grief-driven vengeance that he wants to stop. Dross says he’s not always been kind or dependable, but he knows a lot about magic and will try and help them if they ask and are forthright.

[Note: Seems like he is likely talking about the Nutcracker here, as mentioned earlier.]

Tim offers him the obviously magical book to touch and, when he does, he offers just a full info dump that I will do my best to summarize:

There are other books like Tim’s and other people are using them to try to save what they can.  

The book needs something to be able to work.

There has always been danger in the Neverafter but whatever’s happening now is some sort of unnatural, deeper wound. 

The six of them have been drawn together on purpose and if even one of them strays, they’re all doomed.

They only have a few chances to fix things and some of them may be traps.

Someone in the group knows what the first step is. Once they have the first thing they need, they will have friends with more answers.

There is a way to use the book to bring light back into the world and end the Times of Shadows. But the book is also a burden.

There are steps that could have been taken before things got to this point but they are well past that now. 

Many will offer answers but they should only trust each other. 

As he touches the book, his cape flares and becomes text and sheet music. His face begins to wither and turn owl-like and fill with light. And as offers his last warning, he turns to an owl and then text (it’s all things that ref the Nutcracker story or himself  like the sugar plum fairy, the rat king, magician), and then he disappears. 

[Note: Not clear if this is the same thing that happened to Cole or something else.] 

Let’s cut back to our con-boys. While this has been happening, they’ve snuck back into the carriage to talk to the mirror again. They move the sheet and the mirror makes them do the mirror mirror chant (honestly, kinda seems like he gets off on it).This time, the mirror’s face resembles Pinocchio’s. “Bring me back to her!” the mirror pleads, almost demands. As this happens, the teapot carriage shatters and they manage to leap out just in time. 

The group is left alone with the ostrich Dross strived from the forest for some reason (they let him go) and his giant, sentient, talking rabbit–Eidelgrin. 

Ger is all, “OK, the dude who just disappeared said one of us knows what we have to do next so does anyone wanna speak up?” Puss does, properly telling them what the mirror told him. On a Nat 20 Insight, Ger remembers the golden ball he fetched for his wife Elodie when they first met (this is from the OG Frog Prince story) and connects it to the indent that was made when he touched the book. He thinks that might be what the book wants from him but he doesn’t know where that ball is. Maybe it’s in the castle if Elodie kept it? He doesn’t know why the book would want it though. It’s not magical as far as he knows. Just of sentimental value. 

[Note: Ger just wants to be put back to normal and is very OK with jumping into the book if that’s the move, even though the rest of the party is like maybe hold off on that bud. I’ll talk about this more when we have more information, but I’m not convinced that this book is the perfect solution it seems to be. I’m getting real Crown of Candy SPF vibes if you’ve seen that. And just knowing what Brennan is like as a storyteller, I feel like there had to be more to this than we know.]

The mirror mentioned Elegy and the royals know a bit about the kingdom. Roz remembers that in her time, it was a merchant town with a burgeoning middle class. Ger mainly remembers a weird event that happened a few years back where the prince of Elegy made every young woman try on a shoe. Roz dreamily thinks that that’s the epitome of true love and Tim is less impressed. 

Tim checks the book again–it doesn’t seem to do weird things when he’s handling it, just when other people do–and sees a small illustration of Cole and his son feasting and dancing. They look happy together. There’s something cumulative happening here.

He also sees that a bit of the charcoal from Roz’s image has stayed. It moves to form the word “Elegy” and also the image of a spear made of glass dripping with some kind of ichor. Yikes! Also, in case you don’t know, and elegy is traditionally a poem for the dead! Also yikes!

Puss tells Roz that the mirror said something about her sisters being potentially a problem and Red is like welp,one more person I have to protect. Puss also remembers the scroll he stole earlier and looks at it. It’s a genealogy chart and shows how Lord B is related to the burgomeister (mayor) of Shoeberg. Her name is Cressida Lumley and she is 117 years old. Tim feels a strange familiarity here, like he did with Cole. He thinks it’s some kind of clue. 

[Note: If she’s 117 that means she’s a contemporary of Roz who is 18+100 years of sleep. There’s no way this is throwaway info.]

The group deliberates on what to do as they don’t really want to risk an angry mob when they get to town since they spooked everyone so badly. After some back and forth about disguises that includes Red cutting off her braids and Tim wearing them (sure) and Roz offering to put her hair in a ponytail, The rabbit suggests there are other ways to get to Elegy rather than going through Shoeberg. For example, they can go through the woods! The cast clearly knows their fairy tales and/or their Sondheim because they are wary of the suggestion but the trees part for Disney Princess/Ranger Roz and they decide that that’s the move. They take both the rabbit and the ram-pulled chariot and, with Roz guiding the way, they have a shockingly smooth 1-2 day trek through the forest. 

When they exit the forest, they find themselves in a small abandoned hamlet in Elegy. This is like a little peninsula and there’s more forest ahead of them. Still, it’s a safe place to rest for a while.  

While Puss hits a Nat 20 check to find wine (of course), Roz, also true to princess-character, finds a larder full of talking mice. They’re worried Roz will hurt them and she assures them she won’t. They’re scared of some mysterious “her” transforming them. Roz assumes they’re the people of the town who’ve been turned into mice. Nope! They’re the mice of the town who were once turned into people.

[Note: Lol, Brennan totally caught me off guard with this one. Siobhan walked right into his Uno Reverse card.]

Thus begins a recounting of the Cinderella story from the POV of the poor innocent mice who got dragged into it. A couple of years ago there was a human girl who slept by the fireplace and was nice and fed them crumbs. But one day a fairy with wings and a crown showed up and forcibly turned them into humans and made them drive a coach and go to a ball and it was horrifying. The cast is fighting giggles this entire time as Brennan takes this tale with the seriousness of a ghost story but rest assured, the mice hated this and are horrified by the thought of this fairy turning things into other things against her will and on her own whims. As silly as it sounds, it is pretty messed up if you really consider the implications–which is what we love to do here. 

The mice suddenly freak out because this fairy loves to meddle with the love lives and dreams of young women and Roz is a young woman. She tries to calm them down and Tim asks about the fairy. The mice say that she has ringlets and a crown but last time they saw her, things were different. The two daughters of the mistress of the house cut off their heel/toes in trying on the glass slipper (A plot point from the gnarly OG Cinderella story) and the new princess left the house. That’s when the storms started. And the fairy came back mad, with hollow eyes, turning animals into all sorts of things and making young women fall in love. 

At some point, the princess (to be clear, Cinderella) came back because something had changed. The mistress of the house had changed into “something fierce”. The mice say one night, she called her daughters by the fireplace and then they never saw those girls again. Then she got on a horse and left. She’s had a name before but after that, no one could remember it.

[Note: Hmm, OK. This is giving me fae vibes. This is giving me “names have meaning”. This is giving me Nightmare King from fantasy High. What’s in a name? A lot when you’re talking magic. Let me come back to this later.]

Like I said, the princess came back because she knew something awful had happened, but the fairy followed her and told her to go back to her happy life. The princess called the fairy a “foul thing”, broke the heel off of her glass slipper, and threw that spear of glass into the fairy’s heart. I don’t know how that works logistically but it sounds sick as hell. 

The group is told this happened by the well outside and Red confirms this, smelling fairy blood which Brennan says stains forever.

Meanwhile, Pinocchio, Puss, and Ger have found the motherload of fancy wine. They’re about to head back to the group when Pinocchio sees something that makes him tell the others to go ahead and he’ll catch up. Like before, he sees the door that always means his mother is calling him.

But, unlike always, this door is actually here. Like, here-here. It’s not some kind of magical manifestation. It’s an actual, normal, door. Pinocchio warily investigates, certain that if his mom knew he was seeing this, he’d be in trouble. 

The door opens into what seems like the master bedroom of the house. There is a chair by the fireplace and something behind it. Pinocchio looks at what’s behind it. 

It’s 2 skeletons. Both missing body parts. Both missing their toes and heels. 

Cinderella’s stepsisters. 

And there are bloody handprints all over the floor. 

Pinocchio puts two and two together and comes to the awful conclusion that the stepmother–his stepmother–must have eaten both of her daughters on her hands and knees like an animal. 

He KNOWS he can’t let his mom know he knows this but he also knows this is important. He looks around the room quickly and sees an etching of a paternal, kind looking man, a blood-stained carving knife, and he realizes that the doorknob is loose. 

He takes the etching and the knife and after some mimed prompting from his party-mates, takes the doorknob as well. He feels powerful magic in the doorknob for a moment and then it feels like whatever is in the doorknob goes back to sleep.

[Note: That’s so gnarly. The OG Cinderella story is already kinda messed up with the foot chopping but the image of this high class madame on her hands and knees going full Kronos and eating her daughters? Bleh. I had a section of analysis here but it got super long so I’m going to tack it to the end instead.] 

The group circles back up (though Roz quickly checks in with the mice to ask what color the fairy was wearing–the mice say purple and she says she doesn’t know her but I’m like, people change their clothes sometimes girl. You might know her!) and Puss investigates the well. It doesn’t seem to be a magical well, but Red realizes the blood trail goes into the forest. They, along with the rabbit and the ram (which Lou has unilaterally named “Senator” without telling anybody) track the blood to a sheer cliff where it seems like the fairy started flying. The ram and rabbit can’t follow so they send them back to the town to make nice wine and cheese pairings while they continue on. 

Nearby, they see a road lined with corpses dragged off to the side of the road. They’re clearly merchants from Shoeberg based on their shattered shoe wagons. The attacks look more brutal than what regular highwayman activity would look like. Strangely, there is a pile of gold and some marks that look like someone dumped the gold out and dragged the chest away. (Pinocchio steals some of the gold, naturally.) There are also marks that look like someone dragging a claw foot armoire. After the talk with the mice, the party is wary there might be some transformation shenanigans afoot. Adding to that theory is the fact that a lot of the corpses seem to have died from weird blunt force trauma. There are merchant bodies then more heavily armored bodies like guards that were sent after the merchants and also never returned. 

At this point they realize they might be next on the menu and Brennan starts making them roll stealth checks. 

They move silently through the forest which is littered with brutally slaughtered animals (done by a weapon, not another animal) and strange, morbid sculptures like a birdhouse full of human finger bones.  

They start to hear what almost sounds like voices as they reach the edge of the forest. Eventually, they realize what they’re hearing is furniture that is trying to speak without human vocal chords or windpipes. Awful, halfway transformations of things that were never meant to be alive at all, let alone halfway to human.

A high pitched, sickening voice calls the assembled furniture abominations to attention and tell them that there are interlopers in the forest that must be dealt with. She suspects they may be working with their “wayward young princess” who she fears is being spoiled and made to abandon her destiny. She says the princess must be returned to Elegy so it can be what it was always meant to be.

[Note: Lotta talk this season about how things are meant to be...]

The voice takes a pained, sinister tone as it says that once the princess returns she can GET THIS THING OUT OF HER.

The thing of course being the glass shard that Cinderella stabbed through her heart. As Puss confirms with a little tree climb, it is a ROUGH looking, almost gangrenous Fairy Godmother who is at the helm of this messed up Be Our Guest sequence, standing next to a rotting pumpkin carriage and surrounded by furniture soldiers.

The team figures that if they take out the fairy godmother, the soldiers will just stop being animated so they have one team to distract the soldiers (Roz, Red, Pinocchio) while the rest go for the Godmother. But they take so long planning and are so loud that they lose the element of surprise. 

It’s combat time baybee! And everyone is level one! What could possibly go wrong?

[Note: OK, as I said during my liveblog, I need to redo my conspiracy board. So it seems like the stepmother is indeed the stepmother and, as I said she must have if she were to become a patron, she’s done some sort of awful magic ritual to give herself power. Magic so strong it untethered herself from her name which is serious business in fairy tales. 

But it seems like The Stepmother–who is Cinderella’s stepmother and also Pinocchio's Stepmother is maybe also Snow White’s Stepmother? Because the Magic Mirror asked Pinocchio to be brought back to “her”. And, of course, the Magic Mirror is famously an item that belongs to the Evil Queen from Snow White. It seems like the stepmother has positioned herself as some kind of eldritch uber stepmom. An amalgamation of all of the worst ones (and maybe expanding her market share because Pinocchio traditionally doesn't have a step-mom). 

If this stepmom is Cinderella and Snow White’s stepmom, that makes them sisters in a way. And the lady-knight in glass armor drawn in ash is almost certainly Cinderella. And she called Roz her sister. So that could make Cinderella and Snow the sisters that are coming for Roz. I’m hedging because I’m not sure how many sisters we’re talking here. If we’re thinking Disney canon–which isn’t THE canon but it’s a good enough touchstone–Snow, Cinderella, and Sleeping (in that order) are the OG 3 princesses. It would make sense for Brennan to put them at the center of something (especially if this is some elaborate dig at the Disney corporation and their exploitation and sanitization of fairy tales lol). They’re also the Disney Princesses that have the most life outside of the Disney versions, you know? There are lots of versions of Cinderella and Snow White. But like, Princess Jasmine is tied to Disney. The only princess outside of that trio that I think has a similar amount of play outside of her Disney version is Belle so I wouldn’t be shocked if she makes an appearance. But I do think just the core 3 is likely because 3 is an important number in fairy tales. Brennan says it himself when Puss is talking to the mirror.

But there’s also the matter of timeline. We now have confirmation that the Cinderella story took place just a couple of years ago–after which the Stepmom got all magick-y. And it seems like Roz really was asleep for the past 100 years. And we don’t know when the Snow White story took place yet. But again it’s like, how do these stories fit together in time? 

Also, are the sisters trying to hurt Roz? Help her? Something in between? Are they even working in tandem? I trust them more than I trust the woman who ATE HER DAUGHTERS–Cinderella’s actions with her fairy at least seem to show that she’s good. But we’re clearly missing info here.

Why does the Stepmother want Roz? She wants to keep her away from her sisters but, again, she ate her kids. I’m sure she doesn’t want Roz for a good reason. 

I was thinking about what these princesses have in common besides being the Disney OG 3 (which, again, could be the connection is Brennan wants to get a bit meta with it and he’s made his PCs fight Robert Moses and Amazon so that’s not out of the question). Snow and Roz are both sleeping princesses. Snow and Cindy are both princesses with stepmoms. Cindy and Roz both have fairy connections. Maybe the Stepmom wants to adopt Roz too for some ritualistic reason? Maybe this is some Kingdom Hearts, princess of heart thing. I don’t know anything about Kingdom Hearts but it felt like a thing to mention.

Also, let’s talk fairies for a second. We have at least one confirmed fucked up fairy godmother–even though it doesn’t seem like it’s the same fairy from Pinocchio's story (no confirmation but it doesn’t seem like it). I want to consider again the possibility of fairy tale overlap. Because Roz’s story starts with 4 fairies. The 3 who blessed her and the 1 that cursed her. There’s no reason those fairies couldn’t turn up again as other fairies we’ll encounter in the story. And it’s been 100 years. Fairies are exactly the type of creature that causally  live that long. I don’t remember if I mentioned it, but I was wondering if the fairy Pinocchio met was also the one that cursed Roz. I don’t have an answer here. We’re still at the looking-for-edge-pieces part of putting together this puzzle. But that’s what stuck out to me this episode. I will see you guys next time! Brennan, don’t do anything to Eidelgrin and Senator!]

[bafflement]

Deaged Oz AU: The Search

@zacs-of-rwby The setup for the next ask... you're about to get a very panicked Qrow...

Qrow screamed in frustration as he watched the same fragment of security video for the twelfth time. He could clearly see pocketsized walking down the street, then he just seemed to vanish. It had to be something to do with Salem, but... surely she would have gloated by now? Or at least the idiots underneath her would have done... Tip was just a little boy. He wasn't, really, of course... but the thought of him in Salem's hands as he was at the moment, sickly, disabled... such an easy target. Why the hell had they ever let him go out alone?

"That's it, I'm going after him." He stated, glaring around the room as if daring anyone to gainsay him. Finding only equally worried faces, he stalked out. Oscar stopped him.

"He's my brother, Qrow, I should really go with you."

Qrow sighed. "If Oz is in danger, Oscar, do you honestly think he'd forgive me if I put you in danger too? No, stay here. I'm trained to find the lost, I'll find Oz. Or I'll die trying."

"Die? Qrow..."

"He'd do the same for me, for any of us. Yeah, death ain't quite as permanent for him, but whoever he is next, he won't be Oz anymore. I need to stop that, if I can."

Qrow shrugged into his bird form and retraced Tip's route exactly. Nothing seemed to happen to him as he flew the same route and he quickly got to the spot pocketsized had vanished into. With a mental shrug, he flew over the patch where the only man he would ever love had seemed to just blink out of existence.

Fire seemed to erupt in his blood as he rolled into a crouch, suddenly, forceably human again. He reached for the magic. Oz's magic, that burned deep within him. Nothing, not even a spark. Where the hell was he? He couldn't see any enemies, but that didn't mean he was safe.

He tried to call up his aura and got the same response, then scanned his surroundings, trying to see anywhere Pocketsized might have gone. His eyes alighted on the sign for Beacon Halfway House and he snorted. Well, that was as good a place to start as any.

He stalked to the door and started to knock.

[mamaestapa]

We Need to Talk…

•pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

•series summary: Y/n Hubbard, the younger sister of Cincinnati Bengals Defensive End Sam Hubbard, finds herself in a difficult situation after a steamy hookup with her brothers best friend, who just so happens to be the quarterback for the Bengals. In just nine months their lives will be changed forever. How will Y/n and Joe manage to to go through parenthood together? more so, how will Sam take the news he is going to be the uncle of his best friends baby?

•chapter summary: The time comes for you to tell Joe some of the most life-changing news he’ll ever receive. However, his reaction isn’t exactly what you were hoping for

•word count: 3.6k

•warnings: Pregnancy, morning sickness, vomiting, crying, mood swings, arguing, angst

series masterlist

——————————————————

January 25, 2023

4 weeks pregnant

You pulled into the parking lot of Kettering Health, yawning loudly and tiredly. You were currently having some major caffeine withdrawals. Since you found out you were pregnant, you have stopped drinking coffee. Even though you are able to have as much decaf as you want, you haven't been drinking any coffee due to the fact that it makes you nauseous anytime you're near it. After turning off your car, you reached over to the passenger seat and grabbed your bag. You reached into the bag and pulled out your favorite chapstick. For some reason, this pregnancy is making your lips and skin extremely dry. After putting the chapstick on your chapped, cracked lips, you fluffed your softly curled hair and stepped out of the car. As you made your way into the practice facility, you were greeted by Tee.

"Mornin' Y/n."

You smiled, happy that Tee was the first person you saw upon entering the building, "Hey Tee! How's it going?"

"Pretty good," he shrugged, "nerves are a just lil high around here though."

"Oh I bet. Film this morning?" you asked, already knowing the answer.

He nodded, "Yup, that's where I'm headed now. We'll be watching film all morning," he sighed, "gotta make sure we're prepared for our matchup against the Chiefs."

The Bengals beat the Ravens 24-17 in the wildcard round, moving them on to a snowy divisional round. Joe and the Bengals battled against Josh Allen and the Buffalo Bills, and let's just say, the Bengals came to PLAY. The guys defeated Allen and the rest of the Buffalo crew 27-10. This upcoming Sunday, they'll play the Kansas City Chiefs for the second year in a row for the AFC conference title. If they win, the Cincinnati Bengals will head to Super Bowl 57.

"It won't be easy, but I have faith that you guys can pull out a win." You said with a warm smile.

Tee nodded, "For sure. It's not the defense stopping us that I'm worried about...it's their offense with Mahomes and Kelce," he whistled, "they're one hell of a scoring duo."

You chuckled, "It won't be easy, but think about it. You guys have outscored them before, multiple times at that. I truly believe one that you guys will beat them again."

Tee let out a breath and shook his head, "Shit, I hope so. You comin' to the game?"

You shrugged, stopping at your office door with Tee, "I'm not sure yet. Zac still has to let Kate and I know which one of us is going. I'm hoping it'll be me."

Tee chuckled, "Fingers crossed it's you. we need our good luck charm there."

"Awe, thanks Tee." you smiled, laughing softly.

"Of course. See you out at practice, Y/n."

You waved as he started to walk away, "Bye Tee, good luck with film." He let out a scoff in response, "Thanks, I need it."

As Tee walked down the hall, you shut your door and walked over to your desk. You sat down in the office chair and pulled out my MacBook. For the past couple days, your workload has been fairly small since the season is coming to an end. Normally, when you didn't have a ton of work to do, you would walk around the practice facility and talk with some of guys. However, this season is different. Well, at least now it's different. You have been avoiding talking to the guys the past few days--for good reason too. You're trying to avoid Joe as much as possible. You're still trying to think about how to tell Joe that you're pregnant with his baby. You knew it was going to be hard, but you never expected it to be this hard. As you were typing away on your MacBook, your mouth began to water and your stomach started to churn. You looked at the time: 10:15.

You sighed and got out of your chair. As soon as you were in the hallway of your office, you took off running to the nearest bathroom. Every day around this time, morning sickness hits you the hardest. Your morning sickness was only bad when you first woke up, and then again around 10. You were thankful it wasn't an all day thing like some women experience. You emptied your stomach contents until you swore there was nothing left in there. After flushing the toilet, you wiped your mouth and let out a sigh. Morning sickness was no fun. You walked over to the sinks and washed your hands, grabbing a paper towel in the process and getting it wet so you could wipe the corners of your mouth. You turned the water off and fixed your hair before wiping your hands on your jeans. You made your way out of the bathroom, looking at your shoes as you walked down the hall. Suddenly, you were on the floor.

Hmph.

"Oh my god, Y/n!" a familiar voice said in shock, "I'm so sorry."

You looked and saw Joe standing there, observing you with a concerned look on his face. He held his hand out for you to grab. As soon as you grabbed his hand, he carefully pulled you up from the ground. Your free hand instinctively went to your stomach, protecting the baby in your womb. Joe held onto your hand, a slight blush on both of your cheeks as you looked into each others soft eyes.

"Are you okay?" he asked, furrowing his brows in a concerned manner.

You smiled, "Y-yeah, I'm fine. Sorry about that."

"Don't be sorry, I should be the one apologizing." You nodded in response, "Okay. Well, I uh, I should get going. Bye Joe." you said quickly as you hurried off down the hall.

"Okay..?" Joe trailed off in confusion, watching as you hurried away from him. Joe stood still, his shoulders falling with a sigh as a slight frown appeared on his face.

Closing your office door, you immediately stood against it and let out a shaky sigh. That was a close one. You thought to yourself. You began to breathe heavily and before you knew it, you broke down crying. You've been doing a lot of that lately. You have been extremely overwhelmed, plus all of the added pregnancy hormones don't help. As you choked out a sob, you heard a knock at the door. Trying to control your breathing, you sat back down in your chair.

"Come in!" you wavered out, hiccuping as you wiped away tears from your cheeks. The door opened and a worried Zac Taylor walked in, holding a cup of coffee. Bless his heart. He placed the coffee cup on the small table that sat in your room. He grabbed a chair and pulled it up to your desk so he could sit for a moment.

"Y/n, are you crying?" he asked, voice extremely soft.

You looked up at him with bloodshot eyes. "No?" you said softly, wiping your nose that was dripping with snot. His face softened from his usual hard gaze, "Oh, Y/n..."

You choked out another sob, falling into Zac's arms. He instantly wrapped them around your body and gently cradled your head. "Shhh," he soothed, "you're okay..you're okay." he repeated, over and over, letting you get all of your pent up emotions out. As much as you were thankful to have someone comforting you at the moment, you had slightly wished it was Joe consoling you instead. Zac gently stroked your shoulder as your gut wrenching sobs turned into the occasional sniffle. Zac gently pulled your head up, frowning as his eyes scanned your red face. "Now," he sighed, "what's got you so worked up? Did I give you too much work? If I did, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

You shook your head, sniffing as you wiped your eyes. "N-no, It's not from you." you croaked out, clearing your phlegmy throat and taking a deep breath. You sat up straight and looked over at Zac. He reached out and put a hand on your shoulder, squeezing it reassuringly.

"I um," you said hesitantly, "I'm going to tell you something, and when you find out, I need you to not say anything to anyone."

He nodded, "Of course, hun. Shoot."

"I've only told a couple friends, and now you. So you need to promise me, that you won't say anything, please?" You pleaded, tears pricking your eyes once again.

Zac took your pinky finger in his, "Pinky promise. You can't break one of those, yeah?"

You laughed softly at his response. Zac really does have a soft and joking side to him when he isn't on the field. You heaved a sigh once more, "A couple days ago, I.." you began, gulping nervously before continuing, "I found out that I'm pregnant."

Zac's eyes widened and a small smile appeared on his face, "Y/n...congratulations."

You smiled tightly, tears brimming your eyes, "Thank you."

"So, is this, is this good news or bad news?" he asked, brows furrowed.

"It's, it's good, I think? I'm just so terrified. I don't even know how I'm supposed to tell the father. Hell, I don't even know how I'm supposed to be a mom yet. I mean, my schedule is so busy, and, and the baby daddy's schedule is just the same as mine, so that-."

Your heart dropped to your stomach as you realized. Oh no...I have said WAY too much.

"Hold on, his schedule is the same as yours?" Zac questioned.

You gulped nervously, knowing he was catching on, "Please don't say anything." Your eyes giving away the answer to his question. He nodded and placed a hand over yours that sat on on your thigh. "I won't, I promise," he sighed, "but you need to tell him, Y/n. He deserves to know about his kid."

You nodded, "I know, I know he does. I just don't know when to tell him...or how to tell him," you said, voice coming out as a whisper. Your lip began to tremble again as emotions flooded over you as you told Zac about everything. He pulled you into a tight embrace and kissed the top of your head. It was a comforting, but friendly gesture. After a good ten minutes of silence, except for a couple sniffles from you and whispers of sweet nothings from Zac, you took a few deep breaths to compose myself and you pulled away from his embrace.

"Thank you, Zac."

He smiled, "Of course, kiddo. Hey, if he decides he doesn't want to be in this kids life, you let me know, and I'll have a good, long talk with him."

You couldn't hold back your giggle, "Okay."

"And Y/n?" Zac said softly.

You looked up at him, "Yeah?"

"No matter what happens, just know you have a whole group behind you, supporting and loving you and the baby every step of the way."

You smiled, standing up so you could hug Zac. Your arms wrapped around his neck as he hugged you back, tightly. "Thank you so much. This truly means so much to me." you whispered into his shoulder. You felt him nod as he pulled back and smiled, "Of course. If you ever need to talk, or if you need anything at all, don't hesitate to ask. The guys and I will gladly help."

You smiled warmly, "Thank you. I seriously don't know what I would do if I didn't have the teams support."

Zac chuckled, "You and me both. Is there anything I can do for you right now?"

"Hmm..." you trailed off, thinking about anything Zac may be able to help you with. Suddenly it hit you, "Oh! If it's not too much to ask, could I come to the game Sunday? Even if I'm not the media manager on duty?"

"Yeah, of course!" he nodded, "it wouldn't be the same without you there. Are you sure you can fly though?"

You nodded, "Yeah, I think so? Women fly during their first trimester all the time."

"OK. As long as you feel safe flying, that's fine with me then," he paused, glancing at his watch "Ah shoot, I have to go catch up on some film with Joe right now. I'll see you later Ms. Hubbard."

Your breath hitched at the mention of Joe. Your face fell, but you covered it with a smile, "See you later. Thank you again, Zac. I really appreciate it."

He nodded, a smile tugging at his lips. "It's no problem at all." he went to walk out the door, but stopped in the doorway. "oh, and Y/n. Congratulations, again. You're going to make an amazing mother."

You couldn't help but tear up at his words. He shut the door behind him, leaving you alone in your office. You shook away all the emotions with a deep breath. You leaned back in your chair and placed a hand on your tummy, greeting your unborn baby while you typed away on your computer with your other hand.

~Time skip~

You walked down to the team cafeteria to get yourself some lunch. You kept it light incase your morning sickness acted up again. You got a chef salad, an apple, and a bottle of water. As you were paying for your food, you heard the commotion of the guys coming into the cafeteria. You contemplated on where to eat lunch at. The cafeteria or my office. As you thanked the cashier, you made eye contact with Ja'Marr. He swallowed whatever he was chewing before he greeted you, "Hey, y/n! Come sit."

You smiled, making your way over to Ja'Marr and sitting down across from him.

"Hey, Ja'Marr," you smiled, "how was morning workouts?"

He shrugged, "Eh, not too bad. I think film was worse though. Watching that and listening to Taylor yell at us is torture."

You chuckled and took a sip of your water, letting out a soft Ah before you spoke, "Sounds like torture."

Ja'Marr took a bite of his sandwich. "So, are you coming to the game Sunday?"

You nodded, "Yep." Ja,Marr smiled, "Great! Wanna rep my number?" he asked with a wink.

You let out a laugh, "I don't know. I already promised Tee I would rep his."

"Hey, there's two halves, do a jersey a half." he suggested, laughing lightly.

You smiled, taking a bite of your salad after you replied. "That's not a bad idea, maybe I'll do that."

Ja'Marr chuckled and went back to eating. As you ate your lunch, you saw someone sit down next to you out of the corner of your eye. You looked over and saw that it was Joe. You shifted nervously in your seat as Sam sat down right after Joe did.

Joe smiled, "Hey 'Marr, Y/n."

"Hi." you said quickly, averting your eyes away from him.

Joe turned to you. You could feel his blue eyes boring into you, "Y/n, I didn't see you out on the field today, what were you doing?"

You scoffed, "Does it matter? I was busy. You winced slightly as you noticed your tone was a bit snippy. You didn't mean for the words to come out that harshly, it's just your hormones are making you have terrible mood swings. Oh the joys of pregnancy.

Sam turned to you, giving you an odd look in response to your snippy remark, "It's fine, Y/n. He was just asking."

Before you could say anything that you might regret later, you decided to leave. "I gotta go. See you guys later." You said, getting up from the table and throwing away the rest of your food. You hurried out of the cafeteria and made your way back to your office. The guys at the table all watched as you rushed out of the cafeteria. Ja'Marr and Sam both looked at Joe.

"Bro, what did you do?" Ja'Marr asked, his eyes wide.

Sam chuckled, "Eh, I wouldn't worry. Y/n is probably just on her period. I love her, but when it's shark week, you never ask her any questions."

Joe just sat at the table in silence, suddenly losing his appetite he had worked up from his extreme morning workout. Why were you avoiding him all of a sudden? Suddenly, Joe stood up and walked over to the nearest garbage can, throwing his half eaten lunch in the trash.

"Dude, where you going?" Sam asked, brows furrowed in confusion as he watched his best friend start to the leave the cafeteria out of nowhere.

"I have to go talk to Zac about something. I'lll see you guys outside." Joe said, rushing out of the cafeteria. Meanwhile, you began to pace around your office. A sudden knock at the door caused your pacing to stop, and before you could answer, the door opened. An upset Joe walked I, shutting and locking the door behind him.

"Joe-."

"No." he cut you off, "let me talk, please."

You gulped nervously, preparing yourself for what he was going to say, "Okay." you said, your voice slightly above a whisper.

"Why have you been avoiding me the last few days? Just when I thought we were both getting over the hookup, you start ignoring me. Why Y/n? What did I do?" Joe asked with a pained look on his face. He was completely lost as to why you were treating him this way.

You sighed, "Joe, you didn't do anything, I-."

He rubbed his face, "Oh bullshit, Y/n! You jumped at the sudden raise of his voice. You have never heard Joe get this loud before.

"I don't know what happened or what I did, but whatever it was, how could it be so bad that you have to avoid me?" You sat in silence as he stood and confronted you for your recent actions, "like earlier when you ran into me and I helped you up, you just rushed off! And then just now trying to talk to you in the cafeteria, because god forbid I try talk to you, you run away! Y/n, do you know how much that hurts? I mean, are you embarrassed about hooking up with me? Just, please, tell me what I did to you." His voice cracked with emotion as his beautiful blues began to water from both heartbreak and anger.

You felt the tears well up in your eyes once again. You knew you had to tell him. "Joe, please. Just let me explain."

Joe looked at you, a look of hurt and confusion in his blue eyes.

"Joe, I'm going to tell you something, and I need you to promise me that you won't freak out too much."

Joe's face softened, "Is everything alright?"

Not at all.

You nodded, "Yeah..just maybe it'll be a good idea if you sit down."

Joe sat down on the chair beside your desk that was still there from when you told Zac about the baby earlier in the day.

You took a deep shaky breath. Your palms were sweaty and your heart felt like it was beating a mile a minute. "So," you started, already fearing the worse, "you know how the morning after our uh, our hookup. you asked me if you used protection and I said no, but I did remember I'm on birth control?"

Joe nodded, giving you a look signaling for you to continue.

"Well...about four days ago I found out..."you paused, looking into his eyes as you finished, "that I'm pregnant."

Joe's eyes widened slightly as his breath hitched. "Y-you're what?"

"I''m pregnant."

His face went pale and he stood up, running his fingers through his hair. "Oh my god..."

You cringed, rubbing your temples. "Joe, I am so sorry.”

Joe rubbed his hands down his face, taking a deep breath as he plopped down on your desk, “I thought you were on the pill, Y/n.”

You rolled your eyes, “Yeah well, I hate to break it to you but that’s not a hundred percent effective Joe.”

Joe sighed once again, his blue eyes void of any emotion. You knew he was in pure shock right now. You had felt a wave of many emotions when you found out about the baby, you can only imagine how he’s feeling right now.

“I didn’t mean for this to happen,” you said quietly, voice cracking with emotion. You watched as Joe stood up and shook his head at your words.

“And you think I did?” he asked with a scoff. You swallowed nervously, “I never said that.”

"I'm not ready to be a dad."

"You think I'm ready to be a mom?"

The two of you were silent, both of you trying to process what had been said in the last few minutes during your important conversation. You weren’t exactly sure how you expected Joe to react to the news; however, you knew he wasn’t going to take the news well and be jumping for joy at the prospect of being a father. Joe walked over to the door of your office and reached out for the handle. He stood there, hand hovered over the handle and contemplating over what to do. You noticed his shoulders heave with a deep breath before he stood around to face you.

“I just,” he wet his lips, “I need time to process all of this Y/n.” With that, he hesitantly took his eyes off of you and walked out of your office without another word.

hey loves!

emotional rollercoaster of a chapter huh? well, get used to them because there will be a lot in this series ;)

do you think Joe will come around soon or do you think he'll take some time?

i hope you all are liking this series as much as i am! i'm having so much fun re-writing it. I feel like it's so much better with Joe. thank you again for all the continued love and support, it is greatly appreciated! you are all so sweet and encouraging, I love all of you🤍

tags: @dandelionwrites8 @joeburreauxsworld @theflawedwriter @mrsshiesty @ann288 @ijustcrypretty @theoneandonlyfanz @wickedfun9 @venus-b @hummusxx @stainednailpolishremover @a-moment-captured @alternativemadchen @erinmartin1987 @sirlewisworld @kkrenae @unhingedfangirl @sublimemusic-rebel @meameagirl @ilovejoeburroww @hallecarey1 @j-worlds-blog @blinkloverx3 @jordyn14 @emherb10

[marmolady]

WIP Dump!

I am actually still writing Endless Summer fanfic, believe it or not. It's just... slow. @mauvecatfic @rhemenway888 @sceptilemasterr I'm still here, quiet though I am!

In addition to the fics mentioned here, I'm also working on my 'Montoya grandchildren' collection, and my 'reunions' collection, and at some write some more glimpses into other Catalysts' family lives. As my 'main' post-canon story is long concluded, I'm mostly doing slice of life stuff and not much too heavy. That is, except for potential explorations of the end of the Catalysts' lives. I've already written Taylor's death scene. BUT I have been working on that particular fic on and off for literally years.

Snippets below the cut:

The first thing I've been working on is a series of windows into Taylor and Diego's friendship over the years, including far, far into the future. I think it's about halfway written, so it could be the next piece to make an appearance here and on AO3.

A snippet....

“Hey--” Taylor said as she settled down amongst the soft cushions of her favourite chair, knowing full well she’d be needing to call in assistance when the time came to haul her old body up from them, “I came up with the perfect idea for our next marathon.”

“’Marathon’? Between the two of us, we’re lucky to get through one movie without someone dozing off.” Diego grinned at his friend. His best friend of seventy years.

“That’s what makes it a marathon, because it takes so damn long. We take our time, savouring the laughs, the tears, and appreciating the artform.” A glass of wine, some cheeses to break up the films. And the two of them would reminisce, and Diego would point out his favourites of the crew’s filmmaking choices… or those that were notably bad.

“How about ‘the Zac Efron trifecta’?” Taylor suggested, showning her age. “High School Musical, followed by Hairspray, followed by The Greatest Showman.”

“Let’s just see if we can get through ‘Julie Andrews Fest’ first, okay?”

They did this fairly often. Just chilling out to the tune of films meeting their assigned theme. At the age they were, ‘just chilling out’ was pretty much requisite. Taylor’s arthritis had worsened considerably in the last year, and Diego’s respiratory issues were easily triggered by any amount of exertion. They were reasonably healthy nonogenerians… but they were nonogenerians.

______________________

Otherwise, you'll be seeing this next; some nice Taystela Valentine's fluff. Because so help me I love some Taystela fluff, and if anyone deserves ALL-THE-FLUFF it is Estela Montoya.

A snippet:

“‘Safe’ sounds perfect. As long as there’s no danger, people can stare all they want-- I’m in love with this woman, and I could not be less ashamed.”

Again, Estela momentarily glanced from the road to catch her wife’s eye, to return the smile there. “Don’t worry. I’m not taking you anywhere I couldn’t kiss you. I’ve suffered enough in my life.”

Taylor chuckled darkly, the knowing laugh of someone who knew all to well what it was to go through hell and back… and to try and embrace the happy ending on the other side in spite of the traumas that wouldn’t let go.

“I’m glad to hear it,” she said. “On both counts.”

___________________

Aaaaaand my baby Rosa gets to head to La Huerta for the first time!

A snippet:

“Where are you headed?” the driver had asked, to which Rosa’s Mama Taylor had replied with, “It’s a secret-- don’t want to spoil the surprise for the little one.”

Rosa pretty much knew where they were going-- she’d heard all about it-- but it sounded so mysterious, it seemed likely there would be surprises when she got there. So much of what she’d been told sounded like magic. The taxi driver wasn’t part of the family, so they couldn’t talk about the place where they were flying to while he could hear.

 They were all headed to the special island, the one where Rosa’s moms first met, years and years ago. It would be Rosa and her new family. And… all these other people. Including Uncle Raj, whom she’d just met the day before. He’d stayed at their house overnight before everyone flew out, and was now sharing their taxi to the airport. It was a little bit scary, because he wasn’t just a new adult to meet, but a very, very big one, and very energetic. But Uncle Raj must have known those things were scary for Rosa, because he’d knelt down to her and talked all calm. He seemed kind and gentle-- and at dinner, he’d even whipped her up a special glittery drink with cotton candy on top. ‘Her signature drink’ he’d called it. Rosa liked Uncle Raj, and she hoped that the other new people would be just as nice.

“Oh, a surprise holiday? Qué niña tan afortunada!”

Rosa could barely hold in a giggle at the sight of Raj, who looked just about to burst with the excitement of the secrets they were keeping from the driver-- well, from all the world. It made her feel better, taking the edge off her jitters. It had to be something good they were on their way to.

__________________________

[theatrekidstatus]

Chapter 19

Anthony ramos pov:"We should throw a baby shower/gender reval party" she suggest "your right ill decorate" "thank you so much"

    "i just woke up from a-WHAT THE HELL" she exclaimed "you dont like it" i asked "no......I LOVE IT" she exclaim. "THANK GOODNESS" i was struggling "let me get me dressed then we can invite people" "ok"

I wore this and anthony wore this

"YOU LOOK SO CUTE BEA" she blurted "ditto" Anthony said "do i l-ook b-ig a-lready" i stutter "your not stupid but that was a pretty dumb questions" she whisper "sorry" i stammer "NO IM SORRY" he squeals "i love you so much" i utter "then how do i love you more?" he questions "lets start inviting people"

Dark bitches in white girl

Will you go to our baby shower?

Morgan Saylor:yes

Brian Marcyes

Justin Bartha:yes

Bobbi Salvör Menuez;yes

Chris Noth:yes

Ralph Rodriguez:yes

Men and monters

Dennis:yess

Kelvin Harrison Jr:yes

Jasmine Cephas Jones:yes

Chanté Adams:yes

Rob Morgan:hell yA

Lindsey Morgan:mj,

Pico Alexander:sure

Caitlin Stasey:yes sir

Rita Volk:ill be there

Amadeus Serafini:    ill be there early

Jon Rudnitsky:ill tryqns make it

Zilladegod

Edward Burns:i got you

Zoe Levin:just for y/n

Cara Buono:for yiu bestie boo

Nicole Beharie:OFC

Millie Bobby Brown:if my mom says yes😭😭

Vera Farmiga:mother says you can go😜

Kyle Chandler:so dose dad

Sally Hawkins:im literally hawkins but ye

Ken Watanabe:why not

Zhang Ziyi:kwollio

Charles Dance:coolio my doolio

Bradley Whitford:yes

Thomas Middleditch:sure

Elizabeth Ludlow:if im not tied or nothing

David Strathairn:no.

Aisha Hinds:YES

Randy Havens:I GOT A JOB BUT SURE

Jimmy Gonzales:SURE BESTIE WESTIE

Joe Morton:ONLY FOR MY BESTIE WESTIE Y/N

Laurie DhuHER:DUR

Jonathan Howard:erm sure

Tyler Crumley:cook

Orelon Sidney:sure

CCH Pounder:is there food

Kelli Garner:yeah OFC

Rose Bianco:why even ask

Lyle Brocato:sure cutie

Kevin Shinick:WHO TOL YO ASS TO GO GET A GIRL PREGGY

Josh Winot:his dick odvisouly

Justice Leak:duh stupid bitch

T.C. Matherne:fuck hoe DUR

Al Vicente:YALL ARE SO MEAN😭😭😭 Yeah ant

Natalie Pero:sure ramos

Fiona Hardingham:duh martinez

Paul S. Ryden:mhm ant

Zac Zedalis:cool Anthony

Kenneth Israel:ofc pual

Skylar Denney:WHO

Vince Foster:his middle name

Jesse O'Neill: sí señor

Madeline Brumby: KOOL

Patti Schellhaas KWOLOIO

Joey Beni:CWOOL

Fred Galle:IS Y/N STILL CURE

Joey Thurmond:mhm

Mason Pikea:sure

Aaron Taylor-Johnson:idk

Bryan Cranston:what ev

T.J. Story:DOY

Jason Liles:DOI

John Bubniak:ig

AlExAnDeR hAmIlToN

                                                                              Guess what

Jazzy poo bear😭🙄🔛🔝‼️🗞️🧍🏼‍♀️🫶🏾🤭🎶🗣️🪄✅😑👍🏾🩷😂👦🏿🖕🏾😘❕🔥😔👦🏾💞👹❗️🔊🎩👦🏽:chicken butt?

                  WERE HAVINNG A BABY SHOWER/GENDER REVALTODAY WHO CAN COME

Pippy poo😀🥹☺️😃😅😊😄😂😇😁🤣🙂😆🥲🙃:imma be der first

Mommy nèa(not dirty🙄)😉😗😝🤓😌😙😜😎😍😚🤪🥸🥰😋🤨🤩😘😛🧐🥳:you littarly live down the street from the, but yes from me

Loser Leslie 🤫😐🙄😲🫠🫤😯🥱🤥😑😦😴😵‍💫😶🫨😧🤤🤐🫥😬😮😪🥴:mhm

Weird David 😮‍💨🤢🤕👹😵🤮🤑👺😵‍💫🤧🤠🤡🤐😷😈💩🥴🤒👿👻🤖:yes sir

ThEy DiDnT sAy I CoUlDnT sIng 🤝🏾🤛🏾✌🏾🤌🏾👍🏾🤜🏾🫰🏾🤏🏾👎🏾🫷🏾🤟🏾🫳🏾👊🏾🫸🏾🤘🏾🫴🏾✊🏾🤞🏾👌🏾👈🏻:what do you take for

Christopforgetme👶🏾🧑🏾👩🏾‍🦰👱🏾‍♂️👧🏻👨🏾🧑🏾‍🦰👩🏾‍🦳🧒🏾👩🏾‍🦱👨🏾‍🦰🧑🏾‍🦳👦🏿🧑🏾‍🦱👱🏾‍♀️👨🏾‍🦳👩🏾👨🏾‍🦱:im littarly her dad💀💀💀duh

Oakyyyyy the uncool tree👉🏾🤚🏾🫲🏾✍🏾👆🏾🖐🏾🫱🏾🙏🏾🖖🏾👇🏾💪🏾🫵🏾☝🏾👋🏾🦾🦶🏾✋🏾🤙🏾🖕🏾🦵🏾: im littarly her bro 💀💀

Unhonset feet

Liam Neeson:i thought i star strucked you

Kate Walsh:lemme wash some clothes AND ILL COME

Jai Courtney:I MIGHT BE LATE BUT ILL COME

Jeffrey Donovan:ill be early

Robert Patrick:mhm

Jazzy poo bear😭🙄🔛🔝‼️🗞️🧍🏼‍♀️🫶🏾🤭🎶🗣️🪄✅😑👍🏾🩷😂👦🏿🖕🏾😘❕🔥😔👦🏾💞👹❗️🔊🎩👦🏽: i alr said yes

Michael Malvesti:if you name the baby after me

Tazzie:maybe

Devon Diep:if i rember

Herlin Navarro:can i prefromer

Lewis D. Wheeler:might not be social but sure

Jose Guns Alves:i will be social and go

Osmani Rodriguez:duh

Adam Teper:i will be social but wont go

Mark Rhynard:will the Hamilton cast be there

Jeffrey Wright:doy

Guy Cooper:dur

James Milord:doi

Kayla Caulfield:yes

Adrian M. Mompoint:ye

Arthur Hiou:cool

In the fights😜😜😜😜

Melissa Barrera:if you kid dont be shaking they ass for half of the hights

Lin-Manuel Miranda:IM LITTARLY HER ADOPTIVE DAD FRL FRL

Stephanie Beatriz:ODVI

Ariana Greenblatt:if shes the barrios best

Christopher Jackson:im littarly her third dad

Marc Anthony:sure name twin

Rita Moreno:mabey

Daphne Rubin-Vega:just because i havent seen her in FOREVER

Corey Hawkins:IF THERES FOOD

Leslie Grace:yes

Dascha Polanco:what

Jimmy Smits:can i be the god father

Olga Meredir:GOD MOTHER

Isabella Iannelli:dun

Gregory Diaz IV:mhm

Hailey Jade Panchame:♣︎no♣︎

Luis A. Miranda Jr.:yeah

Susan Pourfar:purr

Hannah Hathaway:bored

Seth Stewart:uh huh

Javier Muñoz:★yes★

Doreen Montalvo:i need to eat

Kadrolsha Ona Carole:today right

The Kid Mero:yes

Nicholas Stewart:yes

Maria Hinojosa:yes

Protest Leader:yes

Serge Onik:yes

Jessica Castro:yes

Daymien Valentino:yes

Leo Moctezuma:yes

Martha Nichols:yes

Julia Harnett:yes

Tom Berklund:yes

Rhapsody James:yes

Ryan Woodle:yes

Noah Catala:yes

Graffiti Pete:yes

Andre Da Silva:yes

Mateo Gómez:yes

Francisco Solorzano:yes

Jos Laniado:yes

Nina Lafarga:yes

Annie Pisapia:yes

Ken Holmes:yes

Nelson Coates:yes

Valéry Lessard:yes

Yesy Garcia:yes

Duh.

Sam Rockwell:duh

Richard Ayoade:duh

Zazie Beetz:duh

Awkwafina:no

Lilly Singh:mhm

Marc Maron:duh

Alex Borstein:duh

Nyvi Estephan:duh

Onoe Matsuya:duh

Craig Robinson:duh

Yūko Kaida:duh

Jean-Pascal Zadi:duh

Ken Yasuda:duh

Kappei Yamaguchi:duh

Kimiko Saitō:duh

Doully:duh

Saverio Raimondo:duh

Fumito Kawai:duh

First Summer Uika:duh

Shohei Osada:duh

Kurt Krömer:duh

Pierre Niney:duh

Loup:duh

Elise Schaap:duh

Igor Gotesman:duh

Serpent:duh

Maasa Takahashi:duh

Sebastian Bezzel:duh

Jannis Niewöhner:duh

Max Giermann:duh

Rômulo Estrela:duh

Fynn Kliemann:duh

Mr. Shark:duh

Alice Belaidi:duh

Andrey Burkovskiy:duh

Sergio Guizé:duh

Walt Dohrn:duh

Babu Santana:duh

Frank Lammers:duh

Mikhail Bashkatov:duh

Joyce Ilg:duh

Luis Lobianco:duh

Valerio Lundini:duh

Barbara Goodson:duh

Gijs Naber:duh

Nasrdin Dchar:duh

Ulrikke Brandstorp:duh

Jody Bernal:duh

Margherita Vicari:xuh

Miss Tarantula:duh

Jeppe Beck Laursen:duh

Denise Aznam:duh

Rayen Panday:duh