#help me theyve been ruining my life

[turnipoddity]

something in the air about doctors…

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

[angelicmemo]

My life is quiet. Why do I still feel this?

[froggywritesstuff]

abed's rom-com | abed nadir

pairing: Abed Nadir x g/n!reader

fandom: Community

request: @lilfartbox1 (i am so sorry for the wait 😭) : please any abed nadir comfort / fluff pieces like theres a little angst of them miscommunicating their feelings for eachother and then find out theyve both been doing the same thing of trying to make the other jealous etc

content warnings: not proofread, fluff, angst if you squint extremely hard

word count: 910

A/N: yikes this is rushed but i recently started watching community again and this had been in my drafts for too long so i wanted to finish it

Abed knew he wasn't the best at dealing with his emotions, often turning to his favourite sitcoms and movies for help. Especially when it came to romance. He hadn't had as much experience with it as he would've liked, so when he realised he started liking you in a romantic way, he quickly became panicked. You were part of the study group, meaning if he started liking you it could potentially ruin the dynamic of the friendship. But when Annie told him you felt the same way about him, he knew exactly what to do. Except he didn't. It wasn't working the way he had planned. He'd been reenacting an age old trope; person a makes person b so jealous that they eventually confess their feelings for person a. He started off small, making sure you'd see him catching glances at some random student in the cafeteria, and zoning out as if he'd been thinking about someone else. That was half true. To make it realistic, he'd always think about you when he pretended to zone out. When someone - normally Annie, who Abed told all about his plan - would catch him staring at someone and begin to tease him about it, he noticed how quiet you would get, how you wouldn't engage in any other conversations and would even leave because you were 'late for something else'. He didn't like it. The last thing he wanted was to know he made you upset. But no one in the movies ever stopped their plan halfway. As much as he wanted to, he didn't stop his plan.

He suspected that his plan was working when you started doing the same thing he did and made him jealous. It was either that, or his plan had backfired and you thought he didn't like you so you moved on. Either way, he still felt insanely jealous of whoever you began to like- whether they were real or not. He needed you to confess to him soon. Very soon. Being so jealous as well as not being sure if he had any reason to be jealous was driving him insane, he couldn't even focus on studying. Not that much studying was happening though.

"Abed, is everything ok?" he barely even registered the question, and was not able to recognize who's voice that was.

"What?" he mumbled back, his mind still elsewhere as he spoke with the group.

"We asked if you were ok." Annie began speaking, "You seem kind of out of it today."

Troy nodded, "Yeah, you and Y/N." Abed's head perked up at the sound of your name, suddenly giving Troy his full attention, "Neither of you have laughed at anything I've said today." he said, looking quite sad.

Abed looked over to where you were sitting, the two of you meeting eyes. You looked at each other for a moment, before announcing to the group you had to leave, not knowing that Abed was following behind you. You stood in one of the more secluded halls, startled when you saw Abed next to you.

"Shit, you scared me." 

"Sorry," he said, making less eye contact than usual, "I wanted to tell you something."

You nodded, signalling for him to go on.

"I like you, Y/N." he was quick with his confession, after hiding his feelings for long he wanted to get straight to the point, "I know you like someone else, but I need you to know how I felt." as he spoke, the situation became more and more real to him. No matter how cliche the plot between the two of you was, it wasn't a cheesy rom-com movie. It was real life. And in real life, there wasn't a guaranteed requited love story. There was a chance you could reject Abed's feelings, and his friendship with you would be ruined. "I'm sorry if this makes things awkward between us," he said, a frown taking place on his lips, "You're one of my closest friends, but I couldn't keep this from you, that wouldn't be fair to you."

You watched and listened to his confession intently, seeing how genuine his expression and words were. He wasn't playing a character, or just reenacting a scene - no matter how much his confession sounded like it was taken straight out of a rom-com - it was real.

"Abed," you began, "There's no other person. I made that up." you explained, though a part of you figured that he guessed that already, "I only acted like I liked someone else because I thought you liked someone else."

He couldn't help the smile forming on his lips, "I made that up too,"

His smile was contagious, as you quickly felt your lips turning upwards into a smile as you laughed softly, "You should start making romance movies."

"I have no interest in doing that. I could but I don't think I'd find it very enjoyable." he paused, "But I appreciate the sentiment."

"Speaking of movies, would you wanna see a movie with me sometime?"

"I would like that. We can look at session times together when we're finished studying. We should also get back to the library."

You nodded, unable to stop the smile growing on your lips as you asked, "Do you wanna hold hands when we walk back or...?"

He smiled softly and held out his hand for you to hold, "I would like that."

"Cool." you took his hand.

"Cool cool cool."

[a-memory-of-younger-days]

I feel very silly asking, I just found your comic and it has been very engaging and good, but I feel kind of lost. Have you made stories with them before? Is there prerequisite things I need to have read? I wanna be able to fully appreciate your stuff.

No need to feel silly! There isn't anything that has to be read before this comic.

@unironicallycringe helped me with a tldr of what I've put under the cut but

Ok so maybe something like

this story's timeline is meant to be shown as disjointed at first because there are chracters that don't know about the events of OoT, and Timie (former Hero of Time named Link) doesn't want to tell them everything that happened because they want to move on from it, but they way they're trying to go about it (completly forgetting eveything and staying away from anyone that was involved) is very damaging to them, because they knew Arn during the events of oot

I got some ocs in this story because it's silly.

Everything under the cut is gonna be a slight word dump of trying to express myself

aLRIGHT I'm gonna put my whole ass out here for anyone else that reads this ask, if you're ever wondering the weird...perspective change between the prolouge and chapter 1 the prolouge is to explain that Link is a little monster creature now, and chapter 1 is okay, now yall are coming onto the bullshit ride but we're going through a guy that has no idea what's going on.

Because God dammit I am not just gonna do a retelling of OoT I've changed some stuff not the biggest stuff but little things.

I don't want to throw all my cards out on the table for the story because by all means it's Timie (who is Link) slowly being forced to confront the memories of OoT and are forced to make peace with them and that things are just different now and that's OKAY.

so everything is a bit fragmentary because Timie isnt the main pov and two refuses to tell anyone what happened anymore because theyve TRIED to do that to varying results like.....say ruining a little potion girl's life because you were doing your job and now she feels like an idiot and hates your guts.

And Timie is one person in a big web of things happening, and it's why I had chapter 1 start with Arn because I wanted eveyone to get to understand that he's a person who is alive in the world and has his own routine and wants and who is about to get tangled up in the destiny thread all because mf had to interact with the former hero of time. And that he doesn't know everything that has happened, just like the reader.

I hope this is a good explanation, basically if it's confusing it's cuz I'm only three chapters deep and the story is fragmentary on purpose.

if anything that big timie getting hugged and it feeling like it's a climax to stuff and an emotional high point for the reader its not....its just for timie, it's for them to start coming out of their shell and for everything to really start kicking off their chracter arc or some shit, they just needed to stop being a little sour baby.

[theosconfessions]

ohhhhhhhhhmygod okay.. I finished! I am all caught up and I have... FEELINGS! 😭 Mostly, I just want to take a moment and say that I LOVE Theo, and I think he deserves a moment of appreciation. Yes, that's right. This man deserves some recognition for the hard work he put into bettering himself and being there for this family.

I get it.. he fucked up.. I mean, he fucked up BIG time. But he worked on himself and he worked on his relationship... and I just want to point out THIS moment... when Dustin was in the hospital, he'd woken up but wasn't himself and Theo was right there by his side through all of it, making sure everything was taken care of (the best he could) and... I just... this line got me "like every other shitty thing we've been through, we'll figure it out together, okay? always together." 🥹 For me, in that moment, he proved that he is worthy of Dustin, and I may have cried a little.

I know he has his faults, and I don't know what's to come in their future, but I'm rooting for them! 💖

oh my godddd what a thing to see after work. Thank you sooooooo so so much for catching up on these boys and their shenanigans . seeing that you love theo is SOOO nice to hear because he really is hard to love sometimes. even im like eh . haha! but hes definitely multi-layered.

he fucked up A LOT and he has in the recent past which we will definitely be getting into but hes not a bad guy or evil. i think with theo the thing is that he tries to give excuses anytime his actions have consequences and back then he started to see that. especially when dustin was in the hospital. granted his stress wasnt the only stress that dustin was under but it definitely did not help things with his health at all. theo stepping down and not running things because he wanted to prove that he was faithful had an adverse effect. dustins like just control your dick,man and come to work lol. but if theres one thing steady is that no matter what these boys have gone through. no matter where they stray. they always came right back together and thats something theos never had before. sure he had marlee but marlee also had jami when they were married lol. this is the first relationship hes been in that is just FOR HIM. and hes attempted to ruin it countless times i think he just doesnt know his worth . maybe he thinks dustins too good for him. probably still does but theres a reason why dustin stays. and dustin himself does not have a squeaky clean past and i think with how 'broken ' they are.. they see 'why' the other does the things they do. which makes it easier to just kinda fall back in line. they always figure it out together <3 no matter where they are or what theyre doing.

nows a unique situation. theos a lot older. dustins taking on more responsibility with not just the teenagers but the two new babies they chose to have. theos kinda end of life crisis-ing out because i think he realized how big of a dickbag hes been. theyve also gone through a lot in the time jump.

i didnt mean to essay but my passion! haha! thank you so so so much you have no idea how this made my day!

[kil9]

re: the taemin thing (sorry im so annoying about this but i feel you wanna talk about it as much as me!). i wanted to mention his blinking habit too, but as someone who is not autistic myself (not diagnosticated at least lmao) i was afraid it was just me making assumption but you noticed it to so!!! cool. anyway i could say many more things but the line between being just a strange little dude and being a strange little autistic dude is so thin!!! (like the fact that he eats random stuff at unlikely times of the day or that he's so forgetful). ANYWAY!!!!!! i just really love him and how shinee adapts their behaviour around him to make sure hes comfortable

YES ur never annoying i absolutely wanna talk abt it forever 🥺🥺

(this got kinda long so im putting it in the readmore lol)

but yeah the blinking habit for real !!! ur definitely not wrong to pick up on that ! (i even sponged it from him sometimes lol x_x) its cool that non autistic ppl have an interest in this stuff tbh :3 i think that more ppl understanding autism and all the weird specifics of it is rly the key to our happiness ykno 🤔because most non autistic ppl know literally. jack shit.

also the eating thing YEAH 😭😭 thats also so autism to me. shinee is so good to him !!!! u can tell that even if they dont know WHY he is the way he is, that theyve figured out how he works and how to treat him....

there was such a moment in the 15m thing when key was asking taemin to "prepare" the veggies... and taemin got such a look of dread where hes like "what...... wdym.. ?" & kibum has to be like "CUT THEM taemin" lol 💀💀 its such a silly moment but its SOO quintessential to me for both what its like to be autistic (ie: what the fuck are u saying to me "prepare" this. as if im supposed to know what that means), and what its like to be close with an autistic person (kibum having to kinda remember to "translate" what hes saying for taemin so he knows what hes talking about, it reminds me of how my partner is with me sometimes 🥺)

also back to when im saying they probably dont know why he is the way he is, even if they know all his ins and outs, i think this is probably the same for taemin 🤔 he strikes me as someone who prob doesnt know hes autistic, just knows hes "weird" and "different" and has figured out how to live like that despite. reminds me of myself kind of, cos i wasnt "diagnosed" (used loosely) until maybe 19 ? which is still young but at that point i had already been thru school and everything not knowing x_x its definitely possible to figure your life out & how you work without a diagnosis, and i think it happens all the time, but its also really really hard. i think having a name for it and something u can actually research & learn about is rly helpful. so even tho hes like 30 now im still kinda always hoping he realises 🤔 if it makes his life that much easier ykno ?

this is also why it pisses me off so much that ppl get THAT up in arms when this is brought up. ppl act like falsely "accusing" someone of being autistic will ruin their life, when really its basically harmless (obviously unless ur directly using it as an insult). even the opposite might be true 🤷‍♂️ someone can rly benefit from realising about themselves. also why im so pro self dx !!! even if everyone is "misdiagnosing" themselves these days (🙄 which prob isnt true anyway) like. whats the worst that could happen ? why does it matter if someone is wrong... they might still find some info that will help them 🤷‍♂️ theres not really any autism "resources" that are in scarcity so i dont rly care if someone thinks they are even if theyre not ?

[demadogs]

Hey! Can you rec your favourite snowbaz fics? I keep seeing some posts in between that mention them and i am curious of the names. (Also I know a lot of people in fandom who refused to read the other two books but pls give them a shot. Awtwb is my fav, even more than CO!!)

PS. Shoutout to you and @kidovna for being the only active snowbaz and byler fans i know of! I feel represented!

HELL YEAH I CAN!!!!!!! ive had people ask me for byler fic recs and i couldnt even give them an answer bc literally the only fanfiction i ever read is snowbaz. ive read maybe 4 byler fics total but i read snowbaz fics multiple times a week which is honestly crazy considering i first read the book like 7 years ago and im still wanting more content every day.

most of these arent that long bc i personally like to read something i can read in one sitting or at most 2-3 days. but if you do want a wholeass novel boy do i have an author for you (philaetos).

the wheel by sleepdeprivedphilosopher

this is one of my favorite fics ever and its also by one of my favorite authors. its an au but theres still magic. simon and baz are in this never ending cycle of constantly being reincarnated in a new life together. theyre always rivals and simon always ends up killing baz but every life the situation for why theyre rivals is different. (this isnt a spoiler you find out pretty soon) the reason for this is that the first time simon killed baz he begged fate, who is like an actual personified thing you can talk to, to give him another chance so she “spun the wheel” and allowed him to be able to have another chance every time he messes up and kills him. so theyve been reincarnated for like centuries. its so good that i wish it was a whole book with completely new characters. i hope this author some day actually write a novel like this i love the plot so fucking much. it kinda reminds me of the show dark which is my favorite show of all time.

do as your told by IL46

also one of my favorite authors. they havent posted that much but everything they have i LOVE!!!!!!!! this one is my favorite tho. simon accidentally curses baz with a compulsion spell that forces him to do whatever anyone tells him to do and they work together with penny to try and create a counter spell for this ancient illegal spell that has no current counter. bazs life is pretty much ruined and hes really going through it but simon helps him. lots of hurt/comfort. i really loved this one.

love alarm by nevergonnacallmedarling

my favorite kinds of snowbaz fics are ones with a spell gone wrong and this is one of those. someone casts a spell that makes everyone whos within ten feet of someone theyre in love with have an alarm go off in their heart announcing their love. so baz is fucked and hes avoiding simon at all costs its really fun (not for him).

kiss it better by krisrix

this one SLAPS simon gets slashed by a goblin in the leg and the only way baz could help is with the kiss it better spell but hes so scared to do it bc he has to kiss the wound and ya know vampire and all that. i love this one.

a room just for two by krisrix

another banger by this author. its just late night conversations between the two of them and they slowly become more and more friendly and open up to each other more and more.

dream with eyes open by krisrix

i love this author ok. this ones about simon invading baz’s dreams over the summer break with “psychological warfare”.

sweet dreams by annabellelux

simon has nightmares so baz casts sweet dreams on him every night but that just leads to simon having romantic dreams about baz.

dont hate the player hate the game by annabellelux

i fucking love truth or dare fics

and these are some much longer ones if thats more what youre looking for. i actually am all here for the slowburn and thats it so ngl to you i ditched both of philaetos’ fics after they kissed even tho theres was so much left but i still recommend it because the slow burn slaps.

wondrous and mystical by philaetos

i fucking LOVE philaetos theyre fantastic. this one takes place right after baz gets back from being kidnapped and it really explores his trauma bc the book really brushed over the fact that he was literally locked in a coffin for over a month. so this is simon and baz slowly becoming friends and simon noticing that somethings definitely wrong with baz. i also like fics where simon finds out baz is gay well before they get together and that happens in this one.

ours by phileatos

this one everythings the same but baz has extremely bad internalized homophobia. i havent seen any other fics that arent aus explore this concept and i wish more people wrote it its an interesting take. baz honestly reminds me of mike in this fic.

the truth will set you free by sorbriqette

another classic fucked up spell trope. baz is spelled to tell the truth if hes hiding something he wants to tell someone so naturally he avoids everyone at all costs for weeks

i could recommend so much more honestly there are so many talented writers in this fandom. about the second and third books, im glad you loved them but i honestly will probably never read them for the same reason as me not finishing philaetos’ fics. im here for the slow burn i really dont care about established relationship that much when it comes to enemies to lovers (friends to lovers i eat it up but enemies i just love the angst). and i know they break up in the second book and i just KNOW id put the book down the second they do and never pick it up again even tho i know they get back together eventually. i just think carry on was perfect and i dont want anything to risk ruining it.

[winterdusktales]

man i really thought the dynamic of the three leads in oasis would be somewhat similar to the three leads in chicago typewriter or my country. well at least that's what the first few eps seemed to be going for

but it became just one of those many annoying kdrama love triangles bcs of the 2nd lead. idek where the plot is going atp

i still like the drama tho. cuz im a sucker for angst no matter how frustrating it gets. and i dont rlly mind where the plot goes. i just wish the three leads maintained their unbreakable bond no matter how complicated their circumstances turn out

like with the 2nd male leads in chicago typewriter and my country, as frustrating as it may be, i still understood why they had to make the choices they made. i wouldnt defend them but i get them. i loooove the 2nd lead in chicago typewriter no matter what and the three leads are still among my top fav kdrama trios. i hated the 2nd lead in my country but i get why he had to turn to the bad side. like theres an actual depth in his characterization

but with cheolwoong its rlly just immaturity, jealousy, and insecurity.

(get ready for a cheolwoong hate essay)

hes still the same highschool boy who would come home crying bcs doohak ranked 1st on top of the whole class. the same boy who was competing "fair and square" to win the heart of their highschool crush. the same boy who would make other ppl do the dirty work for him cuz hes a pretentious coward

the way he is so ready to throw away his lifelong brotherhood with doohak for his highschool crush who he knew for a few yrs and who never even led him on to make him think he has any chance with her

the doohak who he called his hyung his entire life. the doohak who did everything he told him to until highschool. the doohak who would fight his fights. the doohak who /involuntarily/ went to prison for a crime HE COMMITTED just bcs he begged him to tho he knew it would ruin doohaks life. like id be so ashamed to even show up in front of him. if he asks for something, id do it right away without considering it as a payment for my debt cuz nothing could make up for what doohak had to go through bcs of me

not to mention doohak also singlehandedly saved him (again... for the nth time) against that group of college students without any help from anyone

he couldnt even make up his mind if he wishes to save or betray doohak like how he remained neutral with the student activists vs gov thing in his college days. like if ure gonna be the bad guy, just be the bad guy and let me hate u entirely

like u can tell he still cares for doohak (reason why i thought theyd have this unbreakable brotherhood even when they act like enemies in front of eo but theyd come running to save eo when needed to cuz they know deep down they love eo like the male leads in the 2 dramas i mentioned above) but i guess he doesnt care for him enough to let him be happy after all those years of suffering (which he caused)

doohaks friendship with his gang members is even more precious than theirs. like i would trust any of the gang members with doohaks life but not cheolwoong

also the lack of self awareness??? he always brings up doohaks flaws when hes actually way worse

anyway i hope the writers dont give him redemption arc just for the sake of giving everyone a good ending. i want him miserable and i want to hate him until the end. when he finds out the truth abt his birth, i want him IN SEVERE PAIN. i want him to be so ashamed to even go near doohak. on top of that, i want jungshin cutting him off her life for good and giving him the same disgusted face she gave doohak when she found out hes part of a gang. I WANT HIM SUFFERING

and give doohak and jungshin their happy ending ffs! they literally just want a peaceful life together without all these makjang drama. theyve been through soooo much since they were young and until now. enough is enough

[transfemininomenon]

You're making me want to watch Midnight Mass again because i watched it with friends when it came out and we Hated it but you seemed so hype that now i wanna watch it again just to see if maybe it was better than i remember and i was just influenced by my friend's opinion?! I'm very curious to see it from someone else's perspective, what do you think made it so great in your eyes?

OKAY spoilers for the show so if youre planning on watching it sometime look away because im gonna mention some very big spoilers for the show lmao theyre very intrinsic to what im gonna talk about

the primary reasons i like the show is that it really does use like, SO many story elements/tropes that i really like, and ones that i especially like when it comes to horror. starting at the very beginning the theme of returning home after an amount of time has passed and finding it suddenly feeling so unfamiliar & different is a trope that i already went insane over, and currently its a theme that also personally is something im experiencing very vividly. combine this with the trope of old friends reuniting after years apart and kinda Going Through It together is ALSO one of my favorite tropes and is done very very well in the show

it continues with just. i think the absolute ultimate Horror Setting is "small town where weird stuff happens." to probably nobody's surprise one of my favorite shows ive watched in recent years is twin peaks which does the same thing. having a Small Town helps make the entire thing feel a lot more intimate & personal, especially when it comes to characters because like. these people all know each other So Well. theyve grown up in the community, their parents lived in the community, they all know each other. theyve raised their kids together and worked together. it immediately creates such a good dynamic and intimacy with the characters and imo does such a good job of making you Care about them a lot quicker, which benefits a short series like midnight mass very well

that also helps to set the stakes because these are all people you care about, these are people you KNOW, these are people you can identify with. it makes the inevitable horror & tragedy that you know is coming all the more powerful. especially seeing them already dealing with every day horrors that All of us can relate to in some way in the current day like capitalism ruining a now dying community, religious persecution, alcoholism, misogyny, health issues, growing older, homophobia, and disillusionment amongst others. you can understand the desperation & sadness in all of them, and it makes what is to come make a lot more sense

then. a mysterious religious figure arriving in the community. "miracles" beginning to happen. people beginning to become more and more fanatically connected to this mysterious religious figure, and why wouldnt they! theyve all had such struggles in life that seemingly are fixing themselves daily since his arrival, and he promises more. cults have always been a storytelling subject that has gotten to me Every time and one ive incorporated into a lot of my own d&d writing because theyre endlessly so Interesting and scary and the slow build up of the one here is so well done

speaking of the religious aspect, this is the most important part of why i like the show truly. obviously the first big Twist of the show is learning about the Angel, and if i hadnt already been invested in the show this is probably what would have sold me immediately. the linking of Angel to Vampirism is in my honest opinion simply genius - blood in christianity especially is such an important spiritual thing, like linking the "blood of christ" with vampirism is. incredible. its genuinely incredible. vampires have always been intrinsically linked with religion, though are almost always portrayed as being Repelled by it. flipping it around and having a vampire be an Angel & having a priest turned vampire leading his flock slowly leading them toward that same vampirism believing that it is a form of divinity is. its insane. its genius. im obsessed with it.

the show REALLY leans into the religious horror aspect of it too, which i feel like a lot of other stories that have tried to do similar things too often like. back out of it. they pull a "oh see actually it was some SATANIC person tricking the poor unsuspecting christians" or something like that. midnight mass keeps it up throughout the entire show fully leaning into no, from beginning to end it is the christian religious leaders of the community who bring and then continue the Horror, and to the end all in the name of God

religious horror is truly what ends up being THE scariest part of the show, with Bev ending up being both the true villain and scariest figure in a show that has a Literal Horror Vampire Angel. the insidious way in which she helps to slowly poison her community and drive good, honest people into bloodthirsty monsters both figuratively and Literally is terrifying, and the way it ultimately turns into a community literally tearing each other apart through sheer religious & societal pressure is. terrifying. the second to last episode of the show where this all hits its peak at the end is, honest to god, THE scariest thing i have ever watched, and ive seen a LOT of horror in my time

and most importantly, it does religious horror without like. coming across as anti-religious. im someone who does not really buy into religion as a social construct, but i both very very deeply believe in a great big capital s Something & also respect that religion is a very important, and for many a very Healthy, part of many many people. religious based horror ive found too often ends up just coming about as either some disguised satanic panic OR as "religion all bad", and midnight mass i think did a perfect job of like. both calling out religious extremism particularly of the christian variety while ALSO being very religious in tone

like. there are characters who to the end stay very devoted to their faith and to god and that is shown to be their Strength and a good thing. i think one of the absolute strongest and most incredible moments in the entire show is with Annie Flynn as she confronts Bev, during which time Bev tries to bring up her son Riley (someone who both accidentally killed someone and who also is an atheist), as she says:

"God loves him. Just as much as he loves you. Why does that upset you so much? Just the idea that God loves everyone, just as much as you?"

this, to me, is one of the best quotes in the entire show, showing that she still very much believes in God and his love while simultaneously calling out that very particularly american fanatical christian Horror that so much of the story is based on

in the end too, after so much horror has happened, after so much death and bloodshed, it ends not with the townsfolk all casting their faith aside after being so led astray and turned into such horrible creatures. it ends with them one final time coming together as a community, as friends, as family, as neighbors, as sinners who in their final moments ask each other for forgiveness and reassert their faith Together and its. its genuinely beautiful. the ending is to me one of the most beautiful, albeit sad & bittersweet, things i have ever seen. im actually going to insert it because it. man it gets to me

especially!!! especially!! all of the characters despite all of their own sins and the way they fucked up throughout the story. they all end in peace. they all end together with those that they love, theyve forgiven each other, theyve again found Peace. all of them except Bev. the one person who absolutely does NOT deserve to have any peace ends with her so full of fear, frantically trying to struggle against the end coming, the end that the people she played a part in ruining the lives of have found their own peace with. its so beautiful, and poetic, and i love it so so much.

there's other things i really like about it too - the twist that riley, seemingly the protagonist, dies in episode 5 of 7. the slow build on the horror, especially compared to mike flanagan's other works. the INcredibly well foreshadowed twist that sarah was john's daughter. john's story arc of villain turned antihero. the incredible soundtrack, with it being i think the newton brothers' best work yet. these are all things i could also write paragraphs about, which i probably will do in time, but ive only just seen the show Yesterday and still need time to fully formulate thoughts on stuff

also! the show is scary! really, genuinely scary! as mentioned the horror is a slow build, which as said is a stark contrast to mike flanagan's other works. both the haunting of hill house & bly manor are a LOT scarier in the beginning and then gradually get less so, both in the way that horror naturally gets less scary as you get used to it and also in the way that like. with those stories the Scary Things end up just becoming kinda sad. meanwhile midnight mass really lets the horror simmer and build up before, as i mentioned above, it reaches a head in episode 6 when it becomes what i genuinely believe is one of the scariest things i have ever watched. the entire lead up to the fateful midnight mass for easter, the reveal of the Angel to everyone else, the painful dyings and resurrections, and then the ensuing bloodshed.... its terrifying. genuinely, truly terrifying

then, of course, it does also end up becoming Sad too but. its a kind of sadness that just like his previous works feels so earned & carries so much more weight after everything that has happened

theres def more i have to say about the show but again i just watched it yesterday & gotta have more time to think on it but. these are the things that immediately stood out to me!

[pennielane]

its RUBBER SOUL they are ONE on that band!!! everyones CONTRIBUTING at EVERY TURN and you can HEAR every individual in EVERY song and yet its still ONE BAND trading ofd the SPOTLIGHT and its PERFECTLY BALANCED with BOPS amd BALLADS and its both got a cohesive sound while also being stylistically varied and its also vulnerable but CLEVER and theyve only got THEMSELVES in that studio but BY JOVE theyre gonna make the most of themselves! SITAR!!! AFTER LIKE TWO MONTHS OF OWNING ONE!!!! PAUL WITH THE FUZZ BASS!!!! RINGO GETTING ICONIC! JOHN WITH THE LYRICS!!! WHAT??? WHAT????

i want to eat Michelle. You Won't See Me is the PERFECT upbeat breakup song. Nowhere Man greatest harmonies of all time. Norwegian Wood clever kafkaesque masterpiece. Drive My Car the BOP TO END ALL BOPS. WHAT GOES ON UNDERRATED STUNNING BEAUTIFUL. Think For Yourself hits!!!! The Word with the smartest lyrics and the funkiest bass. In My Life 🥺🥺🥺🥺 I'm Looking Through You with the harsh harsh HARSH guitar. wAIT!!! TILL I COME BACK TO YOUR SI—*dies*

bestie do you still have a pulse after all that???

okay but actually BAAAAAASED. i'm squealing just reading your analysis and thinking of all the circumstances surrounding rubber soul. god just even the titanic-sized jump they made from help! to rubber soul makes me want to SCREAM. like they DID that

so true the trading of the spotlight everyone had THEIR moment 🥺 MICHELLE!! that stupid little french tune paul used to play to try and pick up girls turned into THAT masterpiece??!?!?? YOU. WON'T. SEE. ME. i want to throw up from all the feelings when john sings "no i wouldn't, no i wouldn't under paul's "know what i was missing". i'm looking through you is THAT bitch on the album. like the cooler and more mature older sister to you won't see me. i die for that aggressive acoustic guitar. i could write a dissertation about in my life alone and all the things it makes me feel. THE HARMONIES IN THINK FOR YOURSELF. TO SAY ABOUT THE THINGS THAT YOU DO!!! ABOUT THE GOOD THINGS THAT WE CAN HAVE IF WE CLOSE OUR EYES!! THE RUINS OF THE LIFE THAT YOU HAD IN MIND!!!!!!!! don't even get me started on the FUZZ BOX

have you heard the word is LOVE??!!? makes me want to SOB that is WHAT the beatles were all about. they were about the word and the word is LOVE!!!!

see when i get all riled up about rubber soul i think YES. this is my favourite beatles album. and then i listen to i'm only sleeping and that fucker named revolver comes creeping back into my mind and i am once again caught in the crossfire that is my internal war between rubber soul and revolver

anyway I FEEL AS THOUGH YOU OUGHT TO KNOW THAT I'VE BEEN GOOD AS GOOD AS I CAN BE!!!!! WHAT GOES ONNNN IN YOUR MIND!!!! BEEP BEEP YEAH!!!! 

[emetkoto]

what would emet and k'oto get each other for [insert whatever the ff equivalent of christmas is here]?

YEAHHHH STARLIGHT GIFTS!!!!!!! I think for sure by the time starlight rolls around that the weather in the first has returned full force and theyve entered their first winter in 100 years and since there hasnt really been weather there before k'oto doesnt exactly have any warmer clothes with him and sure he could go home and grab stuff but thats precious time he could be spending on hes always very afraid of the time between shards drifting again and potentially losing years so hes like 'mmm.. i will survive the cold against my will but only when i have to' which is fine and good he can handle it during the day but at night when emet-selch comes to spend time with him hes always like 'maybe we can just stay in tonight its so cold :(' and at first its fine but emet-selch wants to go out and take him places and show him things and spend time with him somewhere other than the stuffy inn so i think he would make him a nice warm new outfit!! smth similar to his current style but nice and thick and fur lined so he can handle the nighttime chill better <3 ofc its armored too so he can wear it during his daytime missions too but its mostly for the sake of their dates <3 hes still working on figuring out a solution to keeping the kitty ears warm that doesnt irritate them or cause k'otos hearing to be muffled hehe

as for what k'oto would get emet-selch.....honestly i think he would have a really hard time coming up with something? He would for sure overthink it just going in circles like 'hes immortal hes seen and owned everything at least once what could he possibly want what can i give him that wont make him roll his eyes'....realistically though even if he might find some things silly emet-selch would appreciate anything k'oto could give him! he may jokingly huff and puff about it but he'd be sure to sort of lay off it a bit so k'oto can easily tell that he's thankful without giving himself away too much hehe.....i have it written that for either valentiones or k'otos nameday (which k'oto decided was also emets nameday bc he couldnt remember his actual one) k'oto goes out and digs up an old rare bottle of wine as a gift since emet-selch strikes me as a wine aunt type but you can only come across smth like that so many times...augh its so hard to decide! i understand how k'oto must feel ueue....maybe he could ask feo ul to help him practice his ballroom dancing and prepare a nice meal inside the castle so he and emet could have a nice romantic evening there and he could make up for all the times they tried to have cute dances but k'oto stepped on emets feet or tripped over his own and ruined the moment!!!

bonus: i started doodling this outfit and got carried away and started rendering it despite not ever doing that in my life so enjoy warm cat

[clserflies]

just a wee list of connections i want for my muses. feel free to drop me a pm if you wanna talk abt any of them!

nayul ; - a criminal type or a detective type that finds out one way or another about her blog and after a bit of digging they figure out she’s the one behind it. either they blackmail or just flat out ask her for help with information gathering or other dirty work.

gyeonghui ; - toxic relationships. falsely giving her actual freedom just in the process just ruining her even more. getting her high, putting her in actual dangerous situations, hiding their relationship from mujin and the others in her cult etc. - alternatively someone weathered and wise, someone who’s gone through similar shit as what she’s in right now and sees a bit of themselves in her. they would introduce her to music, simple pleasures, actually work to coax out her real personality and give her the tools she needs to start taking her life back

mujin ; - semi-classic enemies to lovers, m only. they can’t stand each other, whether theyre both from similar scenes or theyre a lawful type that cant stand mujin’s attitude and actions but can never quite pin him to anything actually incriminating. they clash over and over until the tension reaches a peak and mujin is just fucking hurtled out of the closet. possibly a turning point for him.

sydney ;  - childhood friends reunited. they grew apart years ago when they were still young and now theyre just way too nosy about what syd is up to these days. they end up finding about his secret pact with the demon to keep his mother alive and its up to you whether they end up helping him or trying to find a way out of it for him - another enemies to lovers. a classmate that just cant stand his casual attitude about everything and end up setting out to dig up any dirt on him that theyre sure he has. they find out about the pact etc. and end up growing a soft spot for him due to his circumstances.

pluto ; - either someone also homeless or just a regular ol delinquent type that forces friendship onto pluto and drags him along to really experience life beyond just surviving. bonus if they end up developing a romance and even after seeing pluto’s mutations they still just love him for who he is, m preferred for romance though.

ingrid ; - an angelic little goody two-shoes type who doesnt believe in magic and has never set foot in a party their whole life. they hear about ingrid’s escapades through the grapevine though and find themselves so curious about her. ingrid plunges them headfirst into her world, maybe a little romance sparks, maybe they just become fast friends after they find they actually enjoy the chaos that seems to follow ingrid around.

jasper ; - a normal person, probably not very well off, who initially worms their way into his life for a taste of the rich parties etc. they just wanna live like jasper does but quickly find themself with a lot more than they bargained for even after all the times jasper warned them that they shouldnt hang around him. friendship or romance, either way they quickly figure out about jaspers addictions and eventually he opens up to them about his past. just give me all the angst of them trying to navigate his fucked up situation and wondering if they even want to stay by him after knowing what he’s done.

yeseul ; - BEST friends. they have shared interest and hobbies, personalities mesh together so well and everything is just so perfect until they find out about her unconventional tastes. whether they confront her about it or hide that they know until she breaks and asks why theyve been acting so weird, i just want angst and conflict after she’s finally found her first best friend - alternatively someone just like her, possibly an actual serial killer or just a supernatural creature that takes an interest in the girl who’s nothing like what she seems.

cassian ; - a business partner who cassian’s actually known since he was a kid. probably around his age, either another heir or they just work for their own parents company. not sure what we’d do with this but i just love the idea of them having to act professional in front of other people but in private they can just be a regular couple of teenagers/young adults.

urie ; - someone who knew him/knew of him in high school but hasnt actually seen him since before he started homeschooling. possibly a dislike to hesitant friendship with a lot of bumps in the road with trying to navigate urie’s abrasive personality and assure him that theyre not here to make fun of him, they just want to actually get to know him - can you tell i love enemies to lovers. just give me a bully, not necessarily from his school, it could just be someone who loves to stir the pot and be nasty to people for no real reason probably because of personal trauma or its just their upbringing. despite this they seem to be popular etc, people keep making excuses for them etc. urie hates it and has almost actually fought them a couple of times until one day for some reason he actually defends them against someone who’s been particularly nasty to them. thus ensues a confusing and weirdly shaky truce?

kali ; - i love mentor type connections for kali. maybe its a young vampire or just anyone who’s recently been turned into something along those lines, even a werewolf. someone who cant return to their family or friends either because of what they are or because they have no one so kali takes them in and gives them the support they need. - (tw for mentions of torture) a forbidden love!!!! when kali was still young, she fell in love with a vampire hunter/shadowhunter who tricked her into thinking she loved her back only to capture her in order to torture kali with the intention of letting her die of starvation. now she’s older and stronger and is slightly past her grudge but still incredibly wary of humans like that but now she meets another hunter. a few not so friendly run-ins turn into a mutual understanding that kali is not a rouge vampire that needs killing but after they come to a truce kali finds herself running into them over and over again. it’ll take a lot to gain her trust an even then, their relationship is going to be difficult purely because of who they both are. (f only for this one)

ethan ; - seeing as ethan owns an apartment complex, one of the only nice ones that cost barely anything and actually house a surprising amount of supernatural beings much to the obliviousness of any humans living there. id love a plot for him involving one of his human tenants becoming a little too curious. usually he keeps to himself, only really interacting with anyone in the building in order to fix problems or make casual chat to see if anyone needs anything, but perhaps they keep trying to catch him for more than just small talk. eventually he finds himself accidentally enjoying their company but still tries to keep them at arms length. theyll find out about his true identity some way or another whether they overhear a conversation or manage to sneak into the top floor and see his place. just imagine the wonder of a human learning about the secret world living right under their noses, asking him for stories from his past, wanting to get closer to him but his reluctance because he knows that compared to him, human lifetimes are hardly a blink.

benji ; - i really want another forbidden vampire x hunter relationship for benji. him getting caught at a feeding club, always managing to escape but the hunter keeps finding him. eventually he just begs to be killed, spills his entire sob story about being unable to control himself and instead of them actually going through with it they just sit him down and ask how they can help. alternatively they strike a deal for helping him in exchange for selling out actual dangerous individuals. cue a unlikely relationship full of tension and clashing but also hurt and comfort uvu

louis ; - louis is a simple guy, very gentle and not confrontational in the slightest so honestly just give him a project. someone almost unhinged who he ends up trying to worry after only to be dragged into dangerous situation after dangerous situation. they drive him absolutely crazy but he cant stop wanting to look after them and help them.

scott & watson ; - a plot ive been wanting for the twins for so long is a paranormal investigator of some sort hearing about them and hunting them down or even just happening across them by accident. they get thrown in the deep end after realising the girls arent spirits themselves but unwilling hosts to something more powerful than theyve ever faced before. think like outlast 2 vibes of constantly thinking that everythings going to be okay only to be thrown a curveball and theyre back at square one until the eventual face-off with the entity controlling them. 

[skittsyteacup]

TW VENT!! dont read if ur sad or smth!!!

i hesitate to write this. genuinely. theres people i know will see it and theres those who wont but i really want to. i dont even feel upset writing this, i feel pretty good actually. i think writing this wont help, i know it wont, but itll be said right? which is better than nothing(maybe). 

some of us, and i wont name, have a horrible habit of checking accounts of people we no longer talk to and wow! you guessed it. exs fall into that. its mainly to see how theyre doing(usually /neg) or cus theyre bored. but we all get those memories. and the pain can meld to others which sucks, really. thankfully this doesnt happen often! but it still happens and it still hurts. an example is one of them sent a anon tell to an ex of ours asking if they checked their exs accounts. part of the reason why other than curiosity was because we were a little suspicious they sent us tells n shit. im more confident they dont now after a bit of research but we cant talk in headspace easily. and even so who wants to talk about their bad habits? not them. but to the actual point, ive had nightmares my whole life. i dont have dreams anymore as far as i can tell, they always morph their way into something i dont count as a decent thing. and more often than not ive found someone from our past whos hurt us a lot is always there. we had one with a man named steven who ruined our childhood a couple days ago. we screamed at him about how we hate him so fucking much and personally? thats progress! we recognize we didnt deserve it. we recognize that it was wrong and he deserves to burn. 

but quite a few of these nightmares have our most recent ex. since theyre not almost dead like steven i wont name them, ill refer to them as K. im not sure theyll see any of this. part of us hopes they will. part of me hopes that too. id like to help set the record straight.

we dated them for a year and a few days. we met on discord and grew close in a short amount of time. they were 16, i was 14. theyre 18 and im 16 now. so its been almost 2 years, its been 2 years since we met though. the relationship was good as far as i knew but now as ive grown i realize even if the age gap isnt big, thats 2 different maturities. they were hypersexual, i was asexual. the pressure made me graysexual and im also now hypersexual(in a way). i felt bad for saying no, which made me what others see as a shy partner who relies on their s/o to function. i felt bad that i didnt rely on them to exist, as if theyd get mad at me for not needing them to breath. and i think i was right too. even if they think now ‘no i wouldnt of’, i know that that would upset them. because in a way, a twisted way, thats upsetting to someone who wants to be your whole world. they want you to only need them. theyve probably changed. i hope theyve changed. 

but someone stalked their tellonym the other day to see the answer to the tell they sent and they found something else, im quoting so i dont fuck it up,  “whats your opinion on a partner that is being shy?”                                        “it’s whatever but i can’t stand overly shy partners like i’m not going to do everything for you. my ex was like that and it drove me fucking insane”              i want to scream and yell that ‘you did this, this is your fault, it was and still is a problem you created’ but ive grown too. we’ve grown. but i want to talk about how youre wrong, K. how wrong you are. you got upset when i told you no, when i wasnt ready to fuck, when i had issues sleeping, when i hung out with anyone, when my constant attention wasnt on you. you probably dont remember it like that, and thats ok but it wont change my memory in any way. you can shit talk me and i know you have about things you shouldnt. you can get angry over this. i hope you do in a healthy way and right now some of us disagree with me hoping that. back to the topic at hand, though, i felt like you would hurt me if i didnt get your permission or do something you didnt like. maybe thats why i got called co dependent. and i dont mean physically, that youd hurt me like that, i meant mentally. i wouldve dont the physical part. i know i wouldve. i know all of us wouldve. an unspoken part of our brain thought if we didnt then we didnt love you. i remember one time, i was up past 12. you woke up and saw. you got upset, made me feel like the worst person because i wasnt asleep. i went into another room and hyperventilated, having one of the worst panic attacks ive ever had. thankfull i was too distraught to search for anything harmful, and the house was small(we all slept in the living room, the other 3 rooms were in shambles(kitchen worked a little)) so searching for stuff was noisy already. and i knew if i relapsed you would make it about you. which is another thing. i dont think you ever realized it. i could never bring it up either for that reason. i didnt like talking to you about my issues because id just end the topic feeling worse than i started, but this time id also feel like i hurt you. and since you didnt like me talking to other people, and when i was i had to tell you, i just never said anything. and when id have doubts about our relationship, like i felt like you didnt love me/i didnt know how to handle something with you/you did something i didnt like/i noticed a red flag/you think im cheating, i didnt have anyone to talk to. i think i didnt break up with you because i never vocalized my doubts too. i did ask my friends during our half ass break if i seemed like a cheater, if i was like one, if i had tendencies of one. ive been cheated on before and i personally dont think im like one at all but others insight helps a lot! they said no, though, but part of me is still scared they lied. it doesnt matter much anymore though. anyway. to continue on your wrongdoings of a sort, you also accused me of cheating many times within the last week or two of our relationship because i 1) didnt let you log into my discord, you never told me why you wanted to and i wasnt ready to talk to you about a few things until i saw you(or was supposed to) 2) called you a new petname, i called you a lot of things related to the moon i dont understand why that upset you 3) everyone you talked to about us said i was cheating(ill admit, im still a bit disappointed your mom thought that too.). i cant think of anything else at the moment. but still its all bad, right? i dont know anymore. i still feel like i deserved everything you did to me. but ive been told i dont. that i didnt deserve the sexual pressure and the sexualization, that i deserved a nurturing relationship. but you still helped shape who i am now, mostly for the worst, but i know what not to do now so thats something?

im gonna end this here. its long enough, ill continue at a later date if i need to, reblogging is a thing here. i just needed somewhere to say this. theres more to say but god this is long?? enough for now??? and i need to do other things. on a side note, i hope osiris is doing well.

[meowlimia]

TW Food/Weight Log

this is a lot more of a vent than a structured log, ive never really done this before but yknow

**

Just realized how much i said ive in this, sorry

I’ve been eating a lot less lately, but I still feel guilty. Last year I ate so little, I barely even thought about it. Some days I wouldnt eat at all because I just forgot to. I wish I was there again, 20 pounds lighter. Ive dropped 10 pounds this week though, so I’m moving back to what I usually was.

I’ve been purging basically everyday now I think. My doctors appointment triggered it, I was so stupid. I’m nowhere near anorexic or sick enough to be even thinking about recovery.  

I’ve been trying to count my calories lately but Ive mostly stopped, Its not like Im eating homecooked meals or anything that would need calculating. 

I’ve been feeling really comfortable lately with the amount of purging and restricting im doing, it helps to know im making progress. 

I’ve been feeling so awful and hideous, my skin is ruined, my hair is so choppy and dirty, and i hate the color. I wish I was taller, maybe then I wouldnt look so chubby. I have a lot of weird feelings about my body. ive always liked how it looked, i think i have weight in the right places. narrow waist, flat, bigger hips (i would fucking burn my house down to get rid of my hip dips though), i could do with smaller thighs but what can i expect. But its the number that bothers me, i cant stand it. i cant stand when people would ask me what i weigh or have to be weighed at the doctor. 

i wish my clothes fit better, and i could fit in stuff i used to. but im losing weight i know it, i can feel it, im going to be perfect. I cant stand to be overlooked and talked about anymore i cant handle it. i need to be prettier i need to be skinny. i want them to look at me and know what theyve done to me, they ruined my life for years, i want them to feel guilty.

Ive been enjoying food a lot more, nothing really tastes good anymore, besides chocolate milk. i dont really have much to say about it honestly. everything is just so bland. i thought the “skinny feels better than any food tastes” was silly, but i get now. 

[threepointseven]

Hii I hope you're having a good day/night! I'm so thankful you're doing all my commissions ❤❤ Can you write an angst fic about really kind and forgiving MC dying bc of the brothers, and years later they are reincarnated as an angel that's harsh and cold towards demons (except barbatos and diavolo) and the brothers are "I expected this but it damn it really hurts"

Type- scenario 🍄

Flowers included!🌼= Lucifer x gn! Reader, diavolo x Gn! Reader

Note🍀= hello!!! I apologize so so much this took so long!! I was too busy cause i had exams and then lightning strikes in my neighborhood which kills the electricity for like a whole day and a half! Im so sorry it took so long :(( but im actually really proud of this one but its quite long so please read it!! Ily bye <3

💐Your bouquet has been delivered <3💐

The brothers are kind..!

The brothers can change.

The brothers may physically be demons but you’ve seen them, theyre angels at heart!

Its what ive always told myself. Ive always tried to convince my bruised heart that they are simply lost, they need space they need time. If im patient enough, they’ll most definitely welcome me..!

I always take the time to take care of them. When they need it the most! When they need cuddles i’ll be there, when they need someone to listen i’ll be there. I vowed to always be by their side. I want to be their homeland.

How did it come to this..?

I say as i drown in this endless ocean, the water pressure suffocating me, my body simply waiting to dissolve into the demon made sea water.

Oh right… the brothers.. managed to trick me.

“Y/n… we need to talk.. a problem has occurred in each one of our bodies, it’s ruined our ability to use any kind of power.”

“W-what?! Lucifer, guys are you alright?! Is there any way i can help?!”

“Yes.. but it involves you.”

I was of course quite hesitant at first, but i’d do anything for the brothers.. after all theyve done nothing but showed me love. And i prayed that it wasnt a delusion..

“It’s a ritual of sorts.. we’ll summon you into this space and the water will slowly suck out only a quarter of your human energy. It’s nothing too big, you’ll come out alive and uninjured, just slightly tired”

I was tricked and fell into the demons trap as he smothered his lies with a smile, i was lured into their cruel trap as they smirk away and watch my body rot in an ocean they made to kill me, for their own benefit.

“You were good to us, Y/N”

I hear their voices in synch in my head. Make it stop.. let me die peacefully, let me die elegantly and calm, please.

My constant attempts at screaming “help” failed as the sea water choked me.

“Thank you for being our sacrifice, my dear Y/N”

Dont call me “dear”, please dont.

My tears blended with the sea water as i blankly wait for it to end. Where will i go..? I wonder if i’ll become one with the earth.. or reincarnate back home.. i havent seen my mom in a while.. or my father.. maybe after this, i’ll be able to give them a hug..!

Hang in there Y/N..!

I tell myself as my life flashes in front of me, the times i gave the brothers my everything. Ive never done anything wrong have i..? Ive tried my best to be the kindest i can!

Do i deserve this?

I close my eyes calmly, accepting the beat of my heart coming to a stop. As i feel my end a bright light appears in my mind, feathers of white and gold tips flowing with the breeze. The beauty blinds me as my body shuts down. The feeling of being remade pops into my head. Remade? No thats not the word…

The feeling of melancholy washes over me and i seem to have my consciousness back. My eyes adjust to the pure white walls and the gold smudges i see through my eyes.

“W-where am i..?”

“Y/N.”

This voice..

“Simeon?”

Sitting on my knees trying to get up and i stumble slightly at the foreign feeing of a weight on my back before rubbing my eyes. There are 3 males who stand in front of me, and others which i cannot seem to recognize.

“Simeon,, luke, and … michael..? “

I regain my composure and look around, i gasp as the wings that are suddenly on my back, and i look to see that im fitted in a white robe, the fabric glides down my legs and my arms and a confused expression paints my face.

“W-whats happening?!”

“Calm down Y/n”

Simeons gentle voice soothes me and he pats my shoulders

“The brothers killed you 1 week ago. It is my job to decide who is allowed to cross to the celestial realm, and i decided that you, Y/N L/N will reside here, as you are more than deserving of being an angel.”

My eyes widen and i stutter, my legs stumbling as Michael says firmly.

“The celestial realm..? Killed… oh, i remember. “

The unpleasant memory comes back to me and i hug myself. That day everything changed, i was somewhat of a special civilian of the celestial realm, and yes it may be because im lilith’s descendant but it seems like the people in the celestial realm couldnt care less about how im her descendant.

I came to forget about the title of “liliths descendant” as everyone saw me as me. Not someone who reminded them of Lilith, that feeling i havent felt in while due to the brothers constant sayings of “you’re like lilith.”

“Demons are unethical and brutal! I simply will not involve myself with them anymore! Except you too of course!”

Diavolo laughs as barbatos serves us some tea, grinning softly at my resentment of demons. Its been almost a month since ive become an angel, the celestial realm is good to me. I requested that the news about me being reincarnated as an angel be kept a secret to devildom, i do not wish to meet the brothers face to face again..

Our joyful laughs are interrupted by a sudden slam of the door opening. My eyes widen in shock, so do barbatos’ and diavolo’s as i freeze at the sight of the 7 sins, my murderers. I scowl at their presence and furrow my brows.

“What brings you here? Interrupting my afternoon tea with Diavolo and barbatos..”

I angrily pick up the tea cup and avoid their eyes.

“Y/N- youve been reincarnated..!”

Mammon, the man i once had much faith in runs to me, his arms attempting to wrap around me before i glare at him and move away.

“What do you need?”

I ask passive aggressively looking at the regretful faces of the demons.

“Y/N, please let us talk to you-“

“No. I may be an angel but im afraid im not kind enough to interact with the demons who killed me.”

I glare at them menacingly, the rope in my

Mind that stabilized my temper threatening to break.

“It seems you’ve made Y/N quite uncomfortable, do see yourselves out.”

Barbatos adds in staring at the brothers blankly.

“Im in awe, i never realized how despicable demons are. You two are an exception..”

I mumble the last part and frown at the brothers, pointing to the door.

“You’re acting childish Y/N-“

“IM acting childish?! You deceived me and tricked me for the sake of your own benefits! Not for the sake of protecting devildom or Diavolo, no. You killed me to make your powers stronger and didnt even use them for good! You killed me for the sake of your endless greed and crave to be stronger than everyone else. I do not want to talk to you children if you will continue to call me the one childish.”

“…we’re sorry.. Y/N..”

Satan mumbles before closing the door with glassy eyes.

Tears brimmed at my eyes and i stumble back onto the chair urging them to leave, the 7 cower as they leave the castle and Diavolo comforts me.

I pray that i dont need to see them again.. the men who murdered me cause of their greed they couldnt control, i will continue to serve as a citizen in the celestial realm, i am no longer a doormat to those demons.