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inspirehealthandspirit · 2 years

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Why do I Need A Liver Cleanse? The Answers Here

Are you feeling sluggish and tired all the time? Perhaps you’re getting more heartburn and stomach pain in what seems like all of the sudden. Are you feeling congested have allergies & sinuses bothering you this season? So If You're Asking Yourself: Why Do I Need A Liver Cleanse? A Liver Cleanse can help you detox, remove toxins, purge liver deposits and stones. Clues You Need A Liver Cleanse Your liver is calling out for help through acid reflux/heartburn, stomach pain, fatigue, sluggishness, hormonal imbalance, high blood pressure, bloating and excess gas, allergies and sinus irritations. Other symptoms such as anxiety/panic attacks are also symptoms, read more about panic attacks here. There are many more links to disease and the liver. If you're interested in treating the root cause of these diseases and illness, then I recommend reading the Liver Rescue by Anthony William. You'll get so much information it's crazy. You'll reference it all the time. He recommends certain supplements to help with specific diseases/illnesses. My husband and I both take supplements and herbals recommended in the book. During the cleanse we stopped all supplements and vitamins and started again after we finished it. I have noticed a difference. I've also posted To Detox Or Not To Detox where you can learn more about the Liver, Colon and Harmful Organism Cleanse. Benefits of a Liver Cleanse - Improves Digestion - Improves liver function - Boosts energy - Feel lighter - Reduces Bloating and Gas - Clear brain fog CLEANSE DIET It is a five day cleanse or even six days if you include the day after the flush. The liver cleanse kit comes with instructions, you'll need this, that spells out every step of the cleanse. Even what you should eat during this time. You'll eat clean and avoid dairy, alcohol, sodas, and gluten as is recommended. It's also suggested to purchase organic or locally grown foods, however, we bought our food from our regular grocery store which isn't organic or locally grown. Following the recommended diet will bring even better results, however, I don’t think we missed out on too much. LIVER CLEANSE Day 1 Preface this that I started feeling a little off last night. It was Easter Sunday, and I began to feel a bit sore throat coming on. We were all sitting outside most of the day so it could very well be a sinus drainage issue, but I feel it today too. I’ve started the day with green tea to kick the sore throat. I followed the Liver Cleanse instructions throughout the day and ate clean. I also did my HIIT workout and could feel my sore throat or possibly cold being sweat out. Could the liver cleanse drink be helping, quite possibly? The drink itself isn’t that bad. If you drink kombucha it’s a little like that but not as strong. My husband, on the other hand, thinks it's horrible and has to chase it down. LOL, I think for someone who isn’t used to drinking kombucha, aloe vera juice or other “weird” drinks its probably a shock to drink something that has ACV in it. Day 2 I felt cold and fatigued all day until about 2:30 in the afternoon. I pretty much just laid around because I felt like I was getting a cold. Then around 2:30 all of a sudden I was just more alert and felt better. Even had some energy to burn. I took my next dosage of Oxy-Powder and Latero Flora and went to bed. I did find that I was up 3-4 times during the night having to rush to the bathroom. Then I was awake and would fall asleep only to wake up again to go to the bathroom. The cleanse is definitely working without a doubt. My husband, on the other hand, did not feel well at all this morning and said he was up all night because he felt nauseous, had a headache and was even sweating. He was experiencing detox side effects. The nausea was so bad that he was resisting taking dopamine. He succeeded and didn’t succumb to that. He normally wakes up every morning to workout but this morning he was still asleep, so I knew something was up. I asked if he was ok and he said he felt sick. I explained all the toxins are getting stirred up and trying to come out. Its a normal side effect of doing a detox/cleanse, especially if this is your very first cleanse or detox ever. Day 3 My husband woke up feeling better and had a good night’s sleep. For the most part, so did I. My 3-year-old makes it a little hard to sleep without interruption due to her sleeping right on my shoulder with a leg wrapped around my stomach. I definitely feel lighter today and less bloated and tight. We drank the liver cleanse and ACV drink. But at this point, it’s getting boring and I’m trying to stay focused. The drink doesn’t bother me but I miss my tea. I’ve kept myself occupied and feel energetic. Day 4 Today I feel much better and clear-headed. I have a little bit of a headache this afternoon but otherwise, I feel good. I have energy and have only gone to the bathroom a few times. My brain fog has lifted and I'm clear-minded. Yay! Feeling these benefits is what will keep you on track and stick to the rest of the cleanse. Maybe even do another one in the future. My husband has already sworn that he will not do this again. Mainly, because of the taste of the liver cleanse/ACV drink. I think he’ll feel the benefits after it's over and be open to it again. We’ll see. My husband, on the other hand, said everything finally kicked in this morning at 5 am. So maybe he's a little more toxic than me since it took this long to feel any of the actual cleansing part. Nevertheless, I’m just thankful he’s been open enough to give this a try after years of me asking him to try. Day 4 is the last day you drink the liver cleanse and ACV drinks. Tomorrow will be light eating prepping for the Flush Day. Having done this cleanse twice before I am not looking forward to this part but I will do it, of course. At this point, neither one of us is having any cravings for anything. I’m not really hungry either today. Day 5 This is the big day, Flush day. Need I say more, this is exactly what it says. We’ve already been experiencing flush like symptoms all week from Oxy-powder and Later-Flora. Yes, it will happen it's unavoidable its part of the elimination of toxins. And that is what we are going for here. This may be the day you ask yourself why do I need a liver cleanse? Cause you're not sure why you're this BUT don't forget the benefits! This is the home stretch you can finish this! The day itself was a regular day but with a restricted eating plan. My energy levels are up and I feel clear-minded. You will not take Oxy-powder and later-flora on this night. Instead, you will drink Epsom salt, yup it’s lovely (that’s sarcasm) and then olive oil, equally as tasty (sarcasm again). I’m not going to lie. It wasn't easy-drinking Epsom salt and olive oil straight up. (This is where I ask myself that question why do I need a liver cleanse?) I struggled with getting down the Epsom salt mix, which is a laxative in case you are wondering WTH, and had to keep myself from gagging. My husband tried to talk to me right after drinking this, and I had to say don’t talk to me, I’m trying to keep this down. Then shortly after, you take the olive oil shot. You can down all 6 oz as a shot or mix it with some freshly squeezed orange juice. I opted to not shoot it like some badass but rather mix it with OJ and do my best to get it down slowly. I got it down, it wasn’t too bad with OJ and I kept telling myself, I’m going to feel so much better after this. Do it. I did. How Did My Husband Do, You May Ask? After all, I’ve done this cleanse 3 times now, and I still struggle with getting down the Epsom salt drink and olive oil. But I do it every time and don’t use that as a reason to not do it. So surely, my husband is going to be struggling with this too. I’m going to have to coach him through it. Well, my husband freakin’ threw both back like a champ. WTH! He complained all week about the ACV drinks and how that was awful but for some reason the most difficult part, for me anyway, he was like yeah no big deal. DAY 6 While this is technically not part of the actual cleanse, it is part of the flush day aftermath. You will take 6 Oxy-Powders when you wake up. This gets everything moving out of your liver and gallbladder. Instructions say you may see stones being passed. You can use a throwaway strainer if you would like to catch them and see, per the instructions. Yeah, I don’t need to go that far but some of you may. I experienced the “Flush” all day the next day. I had to attend a party that afternoon and was ok for the most part. Running to the bathroom as needed. My husband said he had to go to the bathroom but it wasn’t anything crazy. He was at the same party and even ate regular food. I, however, did not as I ate fruit and drank water. In no way was I going to mess up all my hard work and struggle by eating poorly the next day or days afterward. No need to undo what had just been done. BATHROOM BREAKS This may be a concern for you especially if you work outside your home. I had the benefit of being at home this time. However, the previous two times I did it I was at work just like you. And I managed just fine. As long as you have access to a bathroom, you’ll be fine. My husband did it while being at work all week and he managed. So don’t let this be a deterrent to not try the cleanse. You can order it here and start your journey now. It’s only 5 days plus the next day after the flush. Plan it over a weekend so you don’t have to worry about work bathrooms. LIVER CLEANSE RESULTS I’ve done this cleanse 3 times now and always feel better after. If you’ve never done one or are a pro but haven’t tried this one, give it a try. It may sound scary but the benefits far out weight the Epsom salt drink and olive oil shot. You may be wondering, if I do this how much weight will I lose. What's in it for me besides the elimination of toxins? Now, of course, I measured and weighed myself to give you all the external results from this liver cleanse. It’s not all about the external results though we are going for internal health here. But I know this plays a role in the overall outcome. I hope this answered the question of why do I need a liver cleanse? You'll definitely get benefits of the cleanse at the very least you'll feel a little better. Read about activated charcoal and how it too can help with cleansing out some toxins. For an added benefit try grounding or earthing or dry brushing. WEIGHT LOSS Here it is, I lost 4 pounds (in 6 days), and lost a ½ inch off my waist, a ¾ inch off the smallest part of the abdomen, and a ¼ inch off my lower abdomen. This may or may not seem like a lot to you but we are all different. These results are significant for me. I’m only 5’ so this is noticeable. My husband lost 5 pounds during this time. We don’t have any measurements on him; guys aren’t doing all that. But I can visually tell that he lost weight around his upper abdomen. He can benefit from another cleanse or two. Still, I'm proud he gave it a try. Men if you are reading this you can do this too. I’m still impressed that my husband did this with me. He stuck to it even though the drinking of liver cleanse water and ACV water was a little rough. He persevered and came out the other side lighter, feeling better. And I think eventually he’ll do another one because he’ll remember how he felt after doing the liver cleanse. Time will tell. TAKE AWAY You may think different parts of the cleanse are harder than others. As you can tell from both of our experiences we stuck to it and finished it. Why did we stick to it? Because we know our livers are calling out for some help. It’s vital that we take care of our liver as it works diligently every minute of the day to keep us going strong. Your body is being inundated with toxins every day, and your liver is working hard at cleaning them out, but it’s being overwhelmed. It’s when it becomes overloaded that you experience the symptoms above. You gotta help your body work at optimal levels. You only get one. Try this cleanse to start in detoxing your body. You came across this post for a reason. You're ready to begin healing and not treat the symptoms anymore. Get started! Remember that no two people are the same therefore no two people will have the same results, with anything in life. What works for one may not work another. These are my results alone. You may or may not experience the exact same thing. Listen to your body. 8/22/2019 UPDATE Global Healing Center now includes the organic olive oil and Epsom salt in the Liver Cleanse Kit. No worries about having to get anything extra for the cleanse except ACV. I wish you peace and guidance on your journey. Take care and be well. The Liver Cleanse Kit Is: - 100% alcohol-free. - Vegan-friendly and GMO-free. - Helps eliminate foreign substances and toxins from the liver. - Made with organic and wild cultivated herbs. - Made in the USA from globally sourced ingredients using eco-friendly sustainable manufacturing. Read the full article

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metalheadsforblacklivesmatter · 3 years

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TW ableism, body shaming, fatphobia, gaslighting mention, accusing someone of faking stuff and manipulation ///////////

I appreciate the post you made not too long ago about peoples disability being "enough" (idk if the quotes are correct to put, I put them there because all disabilities are valid and putting "disability" and "enough" in the same sentence isnt a gr8 thing Hdhdjhdkd)

But yeah, I need to get rid of my internalized ableism as well, it also comes from trauma and although I validate others disabilities no matter what, what I say about my own can reflect onto others, and I'd hate for that to effect (affect???) people.

I had a horrible friend group once who gaslit me into thinking i was faking my fibromyalgia for attention/using it as an excuse to be lazy and fat (I'm very much fat but LOL fuck them.) Or using my brain fog and pain as an excuse to be a shitty person and such. I developed a horrible case of imposter syndrome bc I believe it all, it sucks. I feel like a manipulative, compulsive liar that only uses people and that my disability really is made up and all in my head (they especially say that about fibromyalgia) and they said I'm just obsolete and that's why I'm in pain.

It's strange because, why would you make me feel bad about being obese if I was obese? Why is being big so frowned upon?? Why is it that thin people get cared for WAY more easily compared to bigger people who are suffering? (But btw, to clarify, body shaming is horrible, and I'm not denying that thin people suffer too, I hate that society is horrid towards anyone)

SORRY JUST RAMBLING TO YOU ALL HOPE YOU DONT MIND I JUST FELT VALIDATED BY THAT AND I APPRECIATE IT.

Correct me on anything I've said please!

(Agreeing with you)

It's really dumb because fatphobia is rooted in being unhealthy. The whole idea behind being an ass to fat people is because "it's unhealthy".

The fact that fat isn't an indicator of health aside.

They're literally putting someone's value in their health.

They're literally looking at fat people and saying "you have less value because you're unhealthy".

What are us disabled people supposed to say/ think when we see this fatphobic society pointing at fat people and calling them less than because they're unhealthy?

Not to mention, a lot of people are fat because of their disability, but the opposite is also true. A lot of disabled people are skinny because of their disability. At my worst I couldn't hold down food for days on end because of my migraines. DAYS without eating. I wasn't just skinny, I was hella out of shape because I couldn't exercise because I couldn't move because I couldn't eat.

I'm not trying to compare my experience to yours. Obviously fat disabled people get more shit from doctors and society because they're fat.

But since the vomiting was the worst symptom for my, I felt like ignoring my weight because I was skinny was equivalent to ignoring the worst part about my disability.

I also just feel gaslit by society because everyone calls migraines a headache disorder, when it's a neurological disorder where headaches aren't even the most common or the most severe symptom. A lot of my internalized abelism was people calling migraines "just a headache" and it took me years to realize and accept that the headache wasn't even the worst part. Depending on the severity, I could deal with just the headache. The WORST part is the vomiting, vertigo, and the fatigue for days after.

One migraine was so bad I had a bruise down my back for 2 weeks after because I fell on my desk trying to get my meds, and I ended up crawling to my meds.

(That doesn't include the memory issues because that's a whole nother post.)

-fae

#tw fatphobia #fatphobia #abelism #tw abelism

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willadisastercry · 4 years

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More than ‘just a little tired’: aftermath turned aftershocks part 3

tw: discussion of sever burns and re-burning, lots of pain, also lots of heavy emotions, ptsd symptoms towards the end

Keith is in a lot of pain from just having his wounds cleaned but complications arise that make the relief of the pod that much further away. Tensions are still high and everyone’s emotions are running rampant as they are forced to watch their friend be in so much distress, their friend who never let on when he was anything other than angry, who is now crying and begging for it all to stop. Keith is desperate, his stoic facade has shattered but his body refuses to pass out and they still have to separate him from the bits of the suit that remain...

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

(( haven’t edited yet so ignore for now if it’s riddled with errors or some parts make zero sense lol, enjoy!!! ))

The infirmary was both eerily silent and brimming with commotion, nearly devoid of any conversation or background noise at all aside from muted whispers and the gentle clink of tools as the sound of Keith’s pain filled every dreadful square inch and left little space for much else.

Shrio was still perched on a stool with both hands clasped securely around the one of Keith’s that was accessible, the other hanging over the edge of the table limp and unmoving.

The older boy spoke calm reassurances to him in a low voice, the sentiments themselves not so much soothing as the steady cadence of them were.

It was clear he was still suppressing every wince and grimace though his resolve to remain unbothered seemed to be weakening as he fatigued further. And so Shiro’s gentle tenor worked to ground him as his wherewithal plummeted, the neutral pressure on his hand giving him something else to focus on and keep him from panicking while he lay somewhat paralyzed.

He hadn’t moved much as they cleaned his back up after they gave him the muscle relaxant, not that he could if we wanted to, not when his whole body felt about as solid as jello. The only movements possible were occasional reflexive twitches or sudden bursts of shuddering breaths that had whoever was poking his back pause to give him a minute to steady himself.

That was until the team had separated him from as much of the under-suit as they could with just tweezers and saline... because about 30% of what they’d sectioned off around each wound was still attached and not coming free no matter how hard they pulled or however much saline they poured.

It was then with everything cleaned away that they saw how severe it was, how little of the blur of soot around each blast could actually be cleaned away because it wasn’t his skin that was charred, it was the suit itself.

They couldn’t fix that with tweezers but they had to remove the melted material so the pod didn’t heal around it somehow.

Keith’s attention was admittedly elsewhere when the disorienting haze of pain granted him a few moments of clarity once he realized the only hands still touching him were Shiro’s.

It took him a while, but he was able to cut through the fog enough to vaguely tune in to what was going on around him. He has missed the beginning of the conversation that Shiro was having but it wasn’t hard to piece together what was happening.

“The process should be relatively seemless if I use this—“ Coran noted grimly as he presented Shiro with a scalpel that had a cord attached to the end of it “—the scarring will already be minimal given the pod’s capabilities and the fact that these are mostly second degree, but in order to remove the bits that remain I must burn number four again to sever what joins his flesh to the undersuit...”

Shiro had figured as much and so had Keith.

Well no, his addled brain hadn’t figured much of anything coherent in a while, he just wasn’t surprised to hear that it was the only solution.

Keith wouldn’t consider himself as handy as Hunk or Pidge but he knew his way around tools from having a bike and living on his own for so long. And he couldn’t come up with anything else on hand other than a hot knife that would do that kind of job either.

He also didn’t really care how they did anything anymore. He didn’t have the energy to when all he wanted was for this to be over.

Exhaustion seeped into his bones like radiation, clogging the channels in his marrow where his blood should flow and making his entire body feel so very heavy. It was the kind of weight that lulled you into a deep sleep, yet Keith remained awake, his nerves fried and his mind wired.

Shiro sighed, bowing his head to catch Keith’s pleading eyes one last time before nodding, giving Coran the go ahead.

It’s not that Coran was hiding the tool from the other paladins or what it did, that much was sort of obvious. It’s just that the question didn’t concern them, the decision wasn’t theirs to make. Shiro was their unofficial health proxy now that they were in space and called these kind of shots for all of them, but that was especially true for Keith since he’d already sort of been doing so back at the garrison before Kerberos.

The paladins were of course privy to deciding what happened to their own bodies regarding altean remedies or lesser pod stays since some of the options are pretty out there and if they aren’t absolutely necessary, then they aren’t mandated. But all decisions were passed by Shiro who ensured that their younger counterparts were entirely clear on what they were or were not agreeing to before Coran or Allura did anything, given the situation allotted time to take such measures.

This is one of the rare instances where Shiro had little choice in how to handle the matter. There was only one option and Keith would continue to suffer if he wasted time worrying about what none of them could control.

And it wasn’t even that he was too out of it to know what this meant and be able to deliver the green light himself, the fear on his face when Coran said ‘burn’ was more than apparent. But the kid was so goddamned rational about things no one his age should be able to rationalize that it was clear he had already evaluated and come to terms with the predicament in those brief moments of hesitation before Shiro agreed.

His eyes fall closed again and Shiro thinks he can hear the screams already.

The gravity of the decision seemed to dawn on everyone else a beat later, an anticipatory silence replacing the anguished weight that hung on all of them seconds before.

Everything moved slowly for a moment, the rise of chests halted, the chitter of mice quieting while they searched the princess’s face for answers until reality crashed back down on the castleships’ inhabitants like the tidal surge of a hurricane. The green tinge on Hunk’s face deepened several shades and Allura absently slid a waste bin closer to him, her movements robotic, like she wasn’t all there anymore. Pidge’s sobs from her helpless position on the adjacent cot were almost as painful to hear as Keith’s.

The only one to contest the idea was Lance, the sheer horror of what was about to happen registering on the blue paladin’s face like it was a death sentence for his friend.

“No, that’s torture! You can’t possibly think that’s a good idea, it’s barbaric, it’s—“

“Lance, calm down.”

“I will not calm down! Don’t you see how insane this is?!”

“There’s nothing else we can do. Don’t you see where the hell we are? We’re in space. We are light years away from human healthcare, we kind of have to work with the resources that we have!”

“But there has to be another way! I don’t understand why you’re not trying to figure something else out first... haven’t you hurt him enough today, Shiro? For fuck’s sake, aren’t you supposed to be his br—“

“Do it—” Keith punches out in a harsh whisper, effectively silencing the argument “—j-just do it already.”

His voice was gravelly and weak from all the shouting, his waning energy evident in the exasperated punctuation of his words. He’s fairly sure he won’t remain conscious long enough to be truly traumatized by the a procedure and was growing more irritated the longer they delayed it.

Keith appreciated that Lance had a conscience but also knew full well that he was stuck on the agony he was emoting since he usually never emoted at all, and probably not imagining just how awful it must actually be if he was advocating that more pain be inflicted so the sweet relief of the pod came sooner.

Lucky for him, Coran seemed to grasp the concept well enough on his own.

“Alright my boy, as you wish... Allura you might want to grab something for him to bite down on.”

What remained of the upper half of his under suit lay on him in tatters, his back bare except for the front section beneath him with strips of black littered over the table and floor. There’s a square of material missing on his thigh but the rest of the bottom portion is pretty much in tact.

The wounds looked worse free of all the blood and shredded bits. Like so much worse. But Keith didn’t have to see or be told how horrible it looked, he already knew that however bad it appeared, it hurt a thousand times worse.

“I have a topical anesthetic here that should numb the surface tissue but I’m afraid I can’t make any promises about nerve pain that might go deeper... it will still hurt a great deal.”

Talking was hard. He didn’t have the energy to stay awake let alone speak, but since his body was denying him that mercy, he figured forcing himself to communicate might speed the process along.

“Kay... s’fine,” was all he managed in response, his head swimming slightly as he forced the words out.

Allura’s face came into view then, smiling with so much sadness behind it as she lowered a hand to Keith’s flushed and tear stained cheek, gently coaxing him into opening his mouth.

He was sort of confused as to why until she brought a small hand towel folded in a tight roll up to his chin. His eyes widened a bit but he hummed in understanding and parted his blood encrusted lips so she could place it between his teeth.

They hadn’t had a chance to fuss over the gash on his face with everything else they were focused on but he was also very much laying on top of it. The cut itself also didn’t appear to be giving him much of an issue, but the fact that he was resting his cheek in an ever dampening rag as it caught his blood was woefully uncomfortable, the swelling laceration under his eye endlessly agitated with every reflexive jerk.

The sight might’ve been more alarming if his back wasn’t so horrific.

Shiro searched Keith’s lidded eyes when Coran pressed a button that had the tool whirring to life with a warm orange glow before he set it aside to warm up. They were sluggish and bloodshot and slow enough in meeting his gaze that would’ve had him majorly concerned should he not already have dozens other reasons to be.

“The spray might sting a bit at first... just bear with me lad.”

Coran’s voice was pinched and level, his statements clinical and his hands deft.

He’d already gathered that Keith didn’t need things explained before they were done like Shiro who needed to feel like he was in control of his own body when being tended to, or Pidge and her unwavering need to know absolutely everything ever, or Hunk and his already debilitating anxiety regarding the unknown.

No, he was like Lance who didn’t want the details, didn’t need to know what was happening or when. In fact, he reacted worse when he knew.

Keith needed things done without preamble. It didn’t matter how much it would hurt, he just needed it to hurt before the anticipation that it was about to could consume him. And Coran would do whatever he could to ease the red paladin then, so if that meant working fast than he would work fast.

“Nngh...” Keith choked out against the towel, nearly gagging on it when his entire body jerked as soon as Coran started spraying despite the medicine running through his body to specifically lessen reactions like that. But the man didn’t slow once he started, not even for Keith’s muffled pleas.

The spray did in fact sting. It stung a lot.

His head flew back and his eyes screwed shut as he struggled to breathe through the application, jerking despite himself each time the liquid landed on his raw and burning wounds.

The cloth trapped between his clenched teeth had him sputtering on the spit in his mouth and he almost welcomed the fear that flooded his body when his throat closed to keep from inhaling it.

“I know, bud... looks like just a bit more and then hopefully some relief.”

Shiro looked so young when he was like this, the knitted worry lines on his forehead almost out of place for the age he looked then. Keith didn’t like seeing him like that, it’s what he looks like when he’s having a rough day with his ptsd, so he closed his eyes against the tears that were brimming in the corners of them and took in long, purposeful inhales while Coran finished up.

He felt it as soon as the anesthetic started working, a discernible cold partially quenching each tiny inferno that was at the center of his injuries. It didn’t do much more than place a lid on the fires, not putting anything out completely but it was something and had him sagging into the table at the small bit of respite.

“I’ll be right here the entire time, okay? Coran will try to be as quick as he can but you can do this Keith, you’re strong, I know you can do this...” Shiro rambled, his timbre still subdued and settling.

It was nonsense. It was absolute nonsense he was babbling but the older boy’s voice never wavered and the constant presence of it hung on Keith’s battered body like a warm blanket, soothing the biting chill of anticipation that spread over it before the endless waves of agony started all over again.

“It’s going to be okay, bud.”

Keith clung to his words like they were a broken board from a sinking ship, the only buoyant thing in sight that could keep him from sinking right down with it.

“It’ll be over soon...”

He felt himself physically calming the longer he spoke until suddenly his chest didn’t feel as tight.

“...and then you can rest.”

Because he believed him. He believed that Shiro wouldn’t tell him he would be okay if it wasn’t true.

“We’ll get you set up in the pod...”

And for just a second, he actually believed it would end, that it wouldn’t last forever.

“...and then you’ll start to heal...”

The breaths he took were urgent, almost greedy as he relished in the temporary peace from everything. From the pain, from his anxiety, from feeling so fucking helpless.

“...just a little longer. I promise.”

Shiro made a point not to make many promises to Keith, even if he never planned on being anything other than good on them. He knew that too many had been broken for him to trust a vow like that. The words were empty, just another tool for people he trusted to bait him with before they left.

In Keith’s experience, everyone always left.

“I am going to begin now, remember to breathe lad...”

Before Keith had been holding back most of his exclamations of pain, biting his lip or cheek and setting his jaw to swallow them back before they escaped.

He wasn’t exactly sure what it was that made that impossible now, maybe since he knew the pain would be insurmountably worse or maybe because his body was too tired to expend that kind of energy anymore, either way the only thing muffling the sounds then was the towel keeping him from biting clean through his tongue.

The way his back arched when Coran brought the scalpel down looked like it shouldn’t have been possible in his condition. Keith didn’t know it was possible either but wasn’t too focused on the logistics with how intensely his lungs were screaming as he realized he could no longer move air in or out with how shocking the pain was.

It was like he’d been electrocuted, his muscles spasming and his nerves glitching in override.

“Shit, someone help me hold him down... come on damnit, hold him still!” Shiro ordered when it was apparent that Keith was incapable of controlling his reactions as Coran kept at it with the tool.

The movements were violent and quick, more convulsions than Keith’s own will, but they happened with each slice which made it difficult for Coran to work, so Hunk and Lance repositioned themselves on either side of the table and pinned his chest down wherever was most absent of injury while Shiro kept his head still and attempted to talk him through it.

Allura wasn’t having much luck in soothing Pidge either who was hysterical with her hands clamped over her ears. The guilt she felt over being the reason Keith was now in such intense pain was overwhelming and the princess was deeply concerned that she was going to make herself sick or reopen her only somewhat mended wound.

“Huh, huhh, huh... AHGh!”

Coran ignored how his fingers were blistering from working around the red paladin’s struggles.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry...”

Apologies were pouring out of Shiro like his own blood would.

But Lance didn’t buy them. He couldn’t grasp how their infallible leader missed someone being injured this severely.

And for it to be Keith of all people.

He’d spent half of his young adult life on his own, looking out for himself, no other support. He wasn’t used to having a team to look out for him especially since the last time anyone had was when Shiro had taken him under his wing. Shiro who had pretty much promised not to give up on him only to leave for Kerberos and never come back.

And what’s worse, as if anything could get worse at this point, was that Keith genuinely hadn’t wanted their help. He would’ve insisted he was okay whether or not his injuries were known regardless, but Shiro overlooking him in the heat of the moment had only fueled his warped view on taking care of things himself. It made him think he didn’t deserve any help, like he was being selfish for even suggesting he might not be okay when Pidge was also hurt.

It wasn’t true. But Lance knew that Keith couldn’t always decipher those kinds of things, the subtle messages in tonality that other people would’ve instantly picked up as, ‘no, I don’t actually hate you’ but completely eluded him.

Because Keith was extremely literal. He was also a self sacrificial idiot. Kinda like Lance. Not the literal thing, Lance almost never spoke literally.

But Shiro knew that, he knew that Shiro knew all of that about Keith and yet here they were.

His eyes were glossy and he was livid. It didn’t make any sense. They were supposed to look out for each other. It was Shiro’s whole philosophy and here he was, a complete hypocrite.

Pidge let out a strangled hitch then that broke Lance’s focus on analyzing whatever the hell had gone down on that mission.

The guilt was raging an almost identical fire in her chest, licking at her lungs like there was lighter fluid on them and threatening the sinews that had just barely latched across the chasm in her abdomen.

Hunk wished he could cry, wished he didn’t have to be so close to the terrible mess that was his friends’ back or the sounds he was making.

He didn’t know how many more he could stand to hear. How many more times he could handle the pang of terror in his chest when one escaped the lips of either of his friends.

Anytime anyone was hurting he felt like he was too. Like he had an access pass to their pain or some wicked ability to envision exactly how it must feel. And between Keith bucking beneath his hands and the guttural groans smothered by the towel, Hunk’s stomach was flipping dangerously.

Keith’s strained huffs had turned into hysterical shouts.

“Coran,” Allura deadpanned, her voice low and deadly.

They’d started off with a sort of restraint but it hadn’t taken long for them to raise in volume. He hated it, he was too tired to be so vocal and his throat was aching, but he couldn’t help it.

If it was up to him he would’ve just relaxed and taken it. He was used to simply enduring in the moment and compartmentalizing as he went. He had no experience in allowing such real reactions, in being so vulnerable against his every will.

Taking it silently would’ve been just as painful, there was no changing that, but maybe then he wouldn’t have had to see everyone so upset.

But he couldn’t relax. And he couldn’t use his twisted reason to logic himself out of it.

“This is cruel-I can-I can ease his suffering with my powers, move aside and let me—“

“Princess.”

Coran sounded distressed, almost pained. It was the first hint of emotion he’d shown since they’d dragged Keith into medbay.

“You couldn’t heal him without going into a pod first or it would start depleting the quintessence of your life force... we don’t have time for that, you know what my answer is—“

“But it’s worth it! Just a second, even just a touch would make the world of a difference, please—“

“Allura... come on, let him work.”

Lance looked angry still, and Shiro wasn’t sure he blamed him anymore, but the princess’s voice was shaking and his hand on her arm was pulling her away from Coran gently.

And she let him, the sob that erupted from her throat startling everyone. But Lance was there, the usual smirk he wore when speaking to the princess noticeably absent as he braced his her shoulders because they were shaking too.

Shiro is pressing Keith’s chest down flat where Lance had been after he Coran hissed at the heat of the tool while he continued to thrash.

The energy in the room was so dark and heavy it was almost sinister.

But the worst part was seeing it on his face. The desperation in his expressions was gutting. It felt like a sort of betrayal, which in a way it was, but so was the alternative.

Shiro tried to keep up his rambles of assurance but found the sentiments catching in his throat.

It had become wildly apparent that they were more comforting to him than they were to Keith, but he repeated them still, the same nonsense over and over again like a prayer. The swipe of his metal thumb clearing the endless stream of tears out of his eyes was the only constant other than the sound of his own screaming sobs.

And the pain.

His sobs and the pain.

It was blinding and it was everywhere. He couldn’t get away from it. Couldn’t get away from himself or the terrible sounds he was making.

All of it was suffocating. The fire poker dragging against his already charred skin, the hands holding him still, Shiro’s words, his own cries, all of it.

The air was filled with a bitter and nauseating heat, the smell of his own flesh burning permeated it and made him cry harder.

He wanted to throw up, wanted to pass out, hell if he died right there he wouldn’t have even minded.

He just wanted everything to stop.

He didn’t think he could stand much more of it but his body wouldn’t give in. His screams had morphed into one piercing and continuous wail as every limit he had was tested and shattered.

Keith thought he could handle pain fairly well, but this was absurd. This pain was otherworldly.

It’s only when he spits the rag out for the millionth time and begins chanting his own prayer that Shiro really wavered, his hand halting abruptly as he went to put it back between his teeth before they tore through his tongue the next time Coran moved his tool.

But Coran had taken the glowing metal away for a moment and was fiddling with something, so when Shiro leaned in to replace the cloth he could finally make out what he was saying.

“...D-d-d-da-dad... pl-please, dad... dad m-make it st-stop... dad...”

The words were slurred and barely audible with how wrecked his throat was, but there was no denying it.

“Oh, Keith...” Shiro breathed before his jaw was working to muffle his own pitiful sounds.

He was in such a delirium that he was calling out for his father, the man who Keith hadn’t called out to in years because he was dead. He’d left him in the most final way someone could leave.

Shiro didn’t know how many promises his death might’ve broken, just that the words Keith was uttering were what finally broke him.

Allura’s cheeks were still wet with tears but stepped forward anyway and moved the towel back into place, her hands running through and smoothing down Keith’s wild locks all tossed out of place from writhing.

She bent down to speak softly into his ear, Shiro didn’t catch much over the ringing in his own while his eyes locked into place on the towel in his mouth and the blood staining his chin and neck, though he thought he heard something about him being strong, him doing so well...

“Shiro.”

The hand on his arm didn’t make him jump because he couldn’t feel it. The room was expanding and he was shrinking because Keith’s whimpering was beginning to sound like the despairing cries before someone or something died in the arena.

The arena...

His eyes open wide and flit around wildly, the room abruptly fitting back to size.

“Huh?”

Shiro was good at snapping himself back to reality when he needed to, good at functioning at half capacity just to see through whatever he was in the middle of until it was safe to let the lights of the arena bleed into his present.

Not that acknowledging his memories was ever safe. And not that reliving them in his cabin was any safer.

Just easier.

“What is it?”

“I’m starting again...”

He hadn’t noticed that he’d backed up into Pidge’s bed or that her tiny hand had wound its way into his.

“...and he’s asking for you.”

“Right.”

His voice was sturdy again, hands no longer trembling. He could do this.

The whirring of the tool sounds too much like his metal arm, it glows orange instead of purple but that doesn’t seem to matter because it’s cutting into Keith’s skin all the same and the screams that escape his mouth cut into Shiro just as bad.

But he pushes it all away. He can unpack the emotions that rise up with it later but Keith needed him now.

The initial twitches that wracked his brutalized frame when Coran brought the tool back down had Allura turning away and the smoke that rose up with the first slice had Hunk clamping a hand over his mouth and nose. But the princess’s hand never stopped brushing through his hair and Hunk kept the grip on his shoulder firm.

They could feel his muscles loosening, could feel the power of each jerk dwindling.

And then they watched with heavy consciences as even his steady cries quieted, his body finally waving the white flag.

“I’m sorry...”

Shiro chanted it so many times that the syllables blended together and turned into something else altogether.

Keith’s breathing was more erratic than it ever had been and it didn’t seem like he could see straight anymore so Shiro lowered his forehead to Keith’s and draped his metal arm over his neck.

Both were damp with sweat that created condensation on his hand, his hair wet with it and plastered all over, but Shiro couldn’t find it in him to care. He needed him to know that he was there, that he hadn’t left.

“I’m here, Keith. And I’m sorry...”

But his cheeks were flushing with something other than straight up exertion. And Shiro felt it, felt his hand go cold while all the blood raced to his head. He knew what was happening but he wasn’t worried.

He was relieved.

“I’m so sorry...”

The rag falls out again because his jaw had gone slack and his eyes were rolling to the back of his head. Shiro didn’t move to fix it.

His breathing still irregular but falling into a more even rhythm.

Lance looks stricken and Hunk is rather green when they let go and step back.

Pidge had finally found the ability to relax abs was slumping into the bed, eyes glued to Coran’s hand who was still not done.

Still not okay. Still not in a pod, but no longer in pain.

Hunk took exactly one deep breath before devolving into tears. He was done being strong, but Lance never seems to get the luxury and was pulling him into a hug that didn’t have him standing any straighter or have his chest working any less, but it was something.

Coran’s hands move slow and he doesn’t seem to feel the red welts on his fingertips from wrestling with his tools. But he looked more at ease with Keith blissfully unconscious, like he was breathing again.

Shiro was still holding Keith’s hand. It was ice cold and looking sort of blue with the white blotches dotting it. He leaves his other hand on his neck where his skin is hotter, figuring if the cool metal could be useful for anything other than killing, it might just be that.

Lance eyes the distance in Shiro’s gaze, the rigidity in his movements, and he thinks he understands. He thinks he can overlook his anger to remember that the guy is still human.

He’s almost scared that he was speaking out loud when Shiro rakes his grey pinpoints around the room, not appearing to actually see any of it before passing over Lance’s briefly. Hunk has his head burrowed in his chest as he fights to regain his composure but he musters up a small smile for him despite being otherwise occupied.

It’s a peace offering. A sad one at that, the corners of his mouth barely perking up, but it’s something.

Shiro wasn’t sure if he returned it but his heart felt lighter once Lance did that.

The energy in the room was still buzzing but it was less stifling, not as heavy as it had been moments ago.

The artificial sunlight starts to turn purple again and he can hear desperation mix into the buzz and for a second Shiro is worried that Keith has woken up. In a bit of a panic he drags his gaze back down to find his eyes still closed and his face still scrunched up like he hadn’t escaped the pain entirely with sleep.

But that was infinitely better than him sounding like them, the dying things he was hearing.

He vaguely wondered if the medbay was a safe enough place to let the purple flood in and ultimately decided that it didn’t matter.

He’d staved it off long enough, was strong for Keith when he needed him to be.

And so he lets himself drift.

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living-with-pmd · 3 years

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11 Women With PMDD Share What It's Really Like

Premenstrual dysphoric disorder is the evil cousin of PMS. They share the same types of symptoms—moodiness, increased hunger, cravings, fatigue, cramps, pain, brain fog, and depression, among others—but for PMDD sufferers, those symptoms get so bad they can cripple a woman's ability to lead a normal life.

While up to 85 percent of women get PMS, according to the US Department of Health, only about 5 percent of women experience PMDD, according to the American Journal of Psychiatry.

We asked women with PMDD what it's really like living with the disorder. Here are their stories:

"I was diagnosed with PMDD last summer. Six months prior to my diagnosis, I started taking a certain birth control and soon every month I was experiencing severe PMS issues. I am a generally happy person, but during those few days I was someone entirely different. I was extremely depressed and anxious, having much more frequent panic attacks, and was super sensitive and lonely. I was even suicidal, which was terrifying. And the worst part was I was convinced that I had always been this miserable, and that I would always be this miserable, and it was never going to change. It felt as if someone had completely burned out the light in me and all happiness and joy and hope was gone. I didn't make the connection that it was related to my period but thankfully a close friend did. I have since switched birth control, which helped a lot, and increased the dosage of my anti-anxiety and anti-depressant meds. Most importantly, I am aware of the way I feel those few days so I know to expect it, and I can logically remind myself that I will stop feeling that way soon. Looking back, I realize that I've probably always had pretty bad PMS or PMDD. The birth control worsened it but it was also causing a lot of issues I wasn't aware of previously as well." —Katherine H., 22, Edmonds, WA

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"PMDD is out of control. I cry really easily for about a week. My biggest issue is that I am convinced that I am failing at everything—being a wife, a mom, work projects, fitness, my whole life! And even though it feels so real I constantly have to question if my feelings are valid or if they are amplified by my cycle. I just set an alert in my phone to remind me to consider my hormones the next time I feel that way." —Krysten B., 32, Toronto, CA

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"A week before my period, I become a complete psycho, completely unlike myself. I'm tearful, want to eat everything that's sweet or salty, have absolutely no tolerance for anything other than perfection, and prefer to be left completely alone. I already take an antidepressant but my PMDD was a complete nightmare so my doctor gave me Prozac to take for just 10 days a month. Basically, I start it when I start to get that irrational feeling and keeping taking it until my period starts. And that's just the emotional stuff. On the physical side, I have debilitating cramps, backaches, and headaches that last for days. Yep. I'm a peach." —Kristen L., 40, Knoxville, TN

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"In the past, PMDD almost made me suicidal and totally broke my spirit. Yes it wasthat bad. Every month. Eventually I got tired of being a 'crazy PMS woman' and decided I needed to fix this. Since I don't like to take pharmaceuticals, I branched out to homeopathic remedies and I discovered St. John's Wort and essential oils, especially clary sage and Doterra Calm-Its. It's a lot better now but I still have my hard days." —Amy S., 43, Zebulon, NC

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"My PMDD got so bad I had to go to a psychiatrist and be put on Prozac along with another antidepressant I was already taking. I was a mess—anxious, crying randomly over the smallest thing, and eating everything in sight. One example is someone made a YouTube mashup of the Age of Ultron trailers with Pinocchio footage and the 'I've got no strings on me' song and that wrecked me for weeks. Every time I thought about scenes from Pinocchio I would start panicking and crying at my work desk. It's been a few years and I'm better now. I'm off birth control and weening myself off the Prozac. I notice a week before my period I will sob during any sad part in a movie or book I'm reading, and a day or two before, I notice I'm more likely to be anxious." —Kate W., 36, Alaska

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"This has impacted my ability to work effectively. My pet peeve is when people say 'it must be close to your time of the month' when they simply don't like what I'm saying. I have run into that problem a lot at previous jobs and it makes it really hard to be taken seriously. It's bullshit because my feelings are valid regardless and also PMDD is not a joke. I am so lucky now to have a male boss who understands but it wasn't always that way. I have also have found a lot of relief with naturopathic and herbal remedies." —Amalia F., 28, Vancouver, Canada

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"My PMS was tolerable until my second child was born and then everything went off the rails. I'd be looking forward to plans with others, happy, and then about 10 to 14 days before my flow would start, my mood would turn on a dime. I'd be horrible—crying, screaming that ~nobody understands~, just so much emotional pain. I'd basically lock myself up in the bedroom for a full day to cry, get angry, and feel sorry for myself. It took three doctors before I finally found one who would listen to me before I was finally diagnosed with PMDD. I took Prozac for three years for it but it made me feel numb, like a zombie and not like myself. So I quit and my family just deals with me now. As I've gotten closer to menopause the PMDD is not as bad, but can be very unpredictable due to hormonal swings from perimenopause. The worst part now is I feel like my friendships have suffered. I always seem to have episodes around major holidays and events and I end up bumming everyone out if I do show up so I end up staying home a lot." —Colleen T., 50, St. Paul, MN

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"I'm overly emotional for the week before my period. Saying that makes it sound like it's not that bad but I get so distraught that my fiance has actually scheduled it in his phone as 'blood sport' to remind himself what's coming. I'm thankful that he's patient because I also feel like everyone hates me that week, too." —Kenlie T., 36, New Orleans, LA

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"All month long I'm fine and feel even and calm and then suddenly, the week before my period, I can't handle even the tiniest little thing. My irritability goes through the roof (which is not great since I have a 5-year-old) and I feel like I have no friends. It really makes me sad." —Jessica S., 28, Broomfield, CO

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"I know my period is coming because all of a sudden all of my joints hurt, especially my knees and ankles. I also get crazy gnarly cramps and once I even had a cyst that ruptured while I was on a date and the guy had to take me to the hospital! It was so embarrassing. Thankfully my husband now is very understanding when this time rolls around each month. The worst part is people who just think I make this stuff up. Some months are better than others and sometimes the pain is completely debilitating! My emotions are also a rollercoaster. Anytime I see something cute or inspiring, I burst into tears." —Ivie C., 21, Rexburg, ID

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"My PMDD manifests in both mental and physical symptoms. From the time I got my period at age 12, I've had extreme cramps and heavy bleeding. I'd leak at school through a super maxi pad every class so I'd tie sweatshirts around my waist and have to scrub my clothes when I got home. It was super humiliating. I'd have to take six to eight ibuprofen at a time to deal with cramps, and if I didn't I'd end up on the floor sweating like I had the flu. Sometimes I'd even throw up. This meant I ended up spending a lot of time sick in bathrooms and knew where every restroom was at all times. Birth control helped manage the PMDD and other issues, but as soon as I was done having kids, I had a hysterectomy. That was the best thing I've ever done." —Mandy P., 39, Mendon, UT

https://www.womenshealthmag.com/health/a19972132/premenstrual-dysphoric-disorder/

#premenstrual dysphoric disorder #PMDD #pmdd awareness #living with pmdd #actually pmdd #mental health awareness #mental health #women's health #pms #premenstrual syndrome #afab problems

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orcinus-ocean · 4 years

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I am watching hours worth of ex-vegan “interviews” or testimonials, so you don’t have to.

I link to each one so you can see them for yourself, but I wrote down the important points of each one, since I believe this is not just important, but vital information. This could save people’s lives, if they just stop and think and look at another perspective before they go into it.

These are real people. They really wanted it. They really knew what they were doing. They weren’t “doing it wrong”. These are their experiences.

Ex-Vegan (8 Years): Veganism Is a Teeth Rotting, Muscle Atrophying, Degenerating, Fart Fest

A young man with a lot of health issues including severe eczema, got into veganism to get healthy

He had previously been living the typical “college” lifestyle with lots of fast food, no health-thinking at all

For the first year or two, he felt amazing, he did fine for four years, had a successful YouTube channel talking about skin health and the vegan diet

Emphasizing how “literally obsessed” he was with his dental hygiene and health, four years into veganism, his teeth were deteriorating and every time he visited the dentist, he had to have a root canal, he had cavities, infections, receding gums, always something

He was always bloated with a visibly bloated belly

Despite being a very health-focused athlete, his muscles wouldn’t grow the way they should

His skin started going “grey” and his hair lost its rich color

His memory and ability to focus deteriorated

He completely lost interest in food - everything “disgusting”

Feeling a craving for protein, he upped the high-protein vegan foods, and he only felt worse and worse

After realizing this diet was making him sick, he took one bite of salmon and “it was like taking drugs” - clear, physical reaction to it, and compared to the plants giving bloating and gas, “it felt like I was eating nothing, but I had so much energy”

After going back to eating animal protein (as much wild fish/meat as possible), his weight corrected itself, strength in the gym went “off the charts”

The pain and irritation he had on the vegan diet went away

His gums went from white pink to red, “right away”

Digestion issues - gone, hormonal issues - gone

“Since I’ve been eating animals, I feel more humble and more gentle towards animals, I feel more respect towards them, and I feel like I understand the cycles of life and appreciate life even more”

He says the vegan diet can help people to “clean out the body” as it did for him, but veganism, he doesn’t understand. “If your mom was on her death bed, and she had the choice: Die a horrible, painful death, or eat salmon, you would want your mom to die a horrible death rather than eat salmon. I’m asking this to vegans, and a lot of them are like ‘Under no circumstance would I ever have my mom or anyone I know, eat salmon, because it’s killing an animal, it’s abuse’. And I’m like aren’t humans animals?”

“I view the vegan diet as a disease-reversal protocol, not as a ‘forever diet’.”

Ex-Vegan Family: (6+ Years): "Healthy" Vegan & Vegetarian Dogma Depleted Health and Vitality

Casey vegetarian/vegan for ~15 years

Did it to try to clear up his eczema and staph infections (which were so bad the doctors wanted to amputate his legs), didn't really work

He did feel great for the first few months as a raw vegan, but looking back, he believes it was more due to cutting out grains and processed foods, since he found grains are terrible for him

Lost a lot of weight, rotting teeth, reoccuring cavities

Gina became vegan at the age of 13, being a picky eater and caring about animals

The "readymade" vegan food wasn't doing well for her, so she started eating only raw vegan food

She felt really good - for about six months. After six months, a very severe depression, accompanied by brain fog, lack of mental focus, constant hunger, weight loss and joint pain, kicked in

She believed so hard that this had to be right, that she stayed a vegan for 6 years, before introducing dairy

At the age of 17, after four years on veganism, developed a cancerous tumor on her leg (not necessarily connected, but worth noting)

Five years into veganism she was pregnant, and began craving red meat - they started buying local dairy, meat, liver and eggs

After the baby, she went back to raw veganism, and the joint pain came back, "it's detox"

She instead went back to being vegetarian rather than raw vegan, but she still suffered from worsening joint pain, fatigue, brain fog

A couple of years later, she was pregnant again and she was craving red meat so much she even dreamt about it

Her conclusion was "I must be doing it wrong, I must just eat more of the high-protein vegan food"

For her third pregnancy, she stayed vegan, and the birth was the hardest one she had

The baby had the lowest birth weight of the three, still normal weight, but later, he wasn't gaining weight normally

The child couldn't sit up at six months, couldn't walk at a year old, was depressed, only learned to walk after they gave him meat, and he finally became happy

Then on her fourth pregnancy, she was not vegan for the first half, but went back to raw vegan on the latter half of the pregnancy, and this child was healthy

On raw veganism at the end of the fourth pregnancy, her teeth were "falling apart", her bones were aching, and she was so foggy she couldn't think or remember anything

At the end of her pregnancy, she hadn't gained any weight, just stayed the same

Her teeth were full of cavities, despite having been to the dentist and "fixed everything" just some months prior

They could never manage raw fruit more than six months at a time, constant hunger

They believed the constant hunger could be due to parasites, so they ate anti-parasitic herbs which only made things worse

When she stopped eating vegetables (only fruit?), she got skin rashes as well

When they went back to meat, they felt full for the whole day, while on raw veganism, they had to eat all the time and were still always hungry

At the time of filming, they were completely off veganism for four months and she feels like her brain has "grown", she has energy, can exercise again, is gaining muscle

Ex-Vegan (4 Years): How Veganism Shortened My Lifespan

Started veganism as a New Year’s resolution to turn his life around, after living “like a degenerate”

He started with a month-long juice fast, where he felt great

On the first year as a “whole foods vegan” (mainly raw), he suffered from loss of libido, insomnia, migraines, arthritis, couldn’t build muscle

After a year, he went back to a diet of white rice, lean meat, bone marrow and occasional red meat

This diet immediately got his libido and muscle growth back

After some time, peer pressure made him drop the meat, but he still ate eggs

The vegans around him told him “if you continue to eat meat and dairy, you will not be able to ascend and channel divine guidance”

One of them was a nutritionist, and when he told her veganism destroyed his health, she said that he needs to be on 80/10/10, a fruit-based diet

He stayed on it for five months, and it was “the worst 4-5 months of my life”

He went on another vegan diet, based on sprouts, sea vegetables and algae, and a bunch of supplements

Same problems - lack of libido, insomnia, lack of muscle, migraines, cracking joints

A friend who saw him for the first time in years said “you look like one of those kids in the refugee camps”, because his face was so sunken-in

His friend eventually convinced him to go with him to a steakhouse, and he describes the first bite he took as “the fat going straight into my brain” and he felt “like a dying wolf”

He gorged on 2-3 pounds of fatty meat, slept for twelve hours, and his friends told him he immediatly looked like a completely different person

His cracking joints, dry skin and insomnia went away

Still, he went back to veganism, and all the problems came back

He went back and forth between raw veganism and primal diet every 2-4 weeks, rebuilding on an animal-based diet, deteriorating on a plant-based diet, always thinking “this time I will make it work”

He had to give up aiming for optimum health as a vegan, instead aiming for just “normal stability”

Staying at an old vegan institute managed by one of the creators of his sprouts-algae-supplements diet, doing a colonic, the worker there admitted to him most of them there are not vegan, because they fall apart on it, but go on a primal diet

During the colonic, the worker pushed his liver, and he felt “fire” going down his intestines. What came out was all green, spirulina, algae and other such supplements, which had simply stored in his liver

He speaks a lot about studies on different “uncivilized” peoples around the world, who were all eating high amounts of animal fat, wherever they lived

At the end, he speaks of where veganism might be coming from, and the lie that veganism is good for the environment

His message to vegans is to “quit bothering and harassing people”, and that if you care about animals, go buy cheap land in Arizona and make an animal shelter or something, instead of bullying people who eat meat

Ex-Vegan (2 Years): Vegans Have No Empathy for Humans

Vegetarian for six years, before going vegan

Ate mainly raw vegan, and then her stomach became “an empty, vacant hole”, she was always hungry

Throughout her time on veganism, she was taking lots of supplements

Her skin dried up, she got acne all over her face

She became “emotional and neurotic” and “absolutely insane” from a lack of B12

A lot of talk about the cult mindset in the “vegan community”

Starting to eat eggs again, she felt “a little bit better”, but still felt hungry all the time

Panic attacks over tiny things, anemia, constant diarrhea

Started eating fish, it didn’t help much

She was always hungry but had no appetite, had to force-feed herself

After a particularly bad day, she realized she was risking her life, and ate steak the next day

Eating steak for the first time in years, she felt warmth throughout her body, tingling on her head, and “satiated” for the first time in years, “it changed my life”

Ex-Vegan (12+ Years): Veganism Is Starvation - Fruitarianism Is Suicide

Started in 2002 as a vegetarian for a year before going vegan, became raw vegan from 2009-2011, then went on to fruitarianism until 2015

She says many feel great the first year or so on veganism, because they cut out all the junk from their diet

She had digestive issues prior to becoming vegan, thought it might help, but it only got worse and she got sicker as the years progressed

After six years and only getting sicker, she thought it must be the drugs for her health issues, "I'm doing it wrong", or "my body is wrong"

(They talk about some very interesting "meat and milk causes cancer"-studies four minutes in)

She said the raw vegan years were the worst of her life, that her brain “stopped functioning”. She became "permanently psychotic", she "saw hell" and heard voices - conclusion: "oh, it's detox"

When she stopped veganism in 2015, she had a test done on her hair. They said they had never seen that much heavy metal in someone's hair before

She had been doing nothing but "cleansing" and "detoxing" for the past five years, and she was "the most toxic, sick person you'll ever meet"

She was “literally dying” towards the end, freezing cold all the time, her bones hurt so much she couldn't lay on a hard surface

She couldn't digest anything but fruit anymore, it took two years of quitting raw veganism until the point where she could digest vegetables and meat again

Her teeth had to be all "redone", because they were rotten to the roots, her hair was falling out

She was told that on this fruitarian diet, it will feel like hell for 2-3 years, because of the "detox", then they will feel great, like godlike beings

But since 2-3 years passed and people still felt awful, their "leader" changed that to "people are so sick today, the detox will take 5-6 years!"

This also didn't happen, people stuck for 5-6 years and only got sicker, so the story changed to "7-8 years, then you will feel great!"

Her comment: "You can't be a herbivore and be healthy. If you want to have a life of mental illness and an early death and degeneration, go be vegan."

Many of these people have also spoken of how many well-known names in the vegan/raw/fruitarian communities (from YouTubers to authors) are known “cheaters” who eat meat frequently in order to stay healthy, while lying to their audiences and telling them to stay vegan.

These were only five. I will do more of these posts, to keep them at a readable length.

#vegans #veganism #raw vegan #plant based #ex vegan #anti vegan #fruitarianism #vegan health

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bubbasmeltys-blog · 3 years

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Fatigue and Brain Fog Day

WHEN FATIGUE AND BRAIN FOG HIT

It is one of those days again where I want to get things done, but my body has other plans. I am just coming out of a bad ME crash but mine are strange. They come in waves throughout the day. So one minute I am feeling fine-ish , never fully fine but I will take fine-ish over the rest anytime! Then the next minute, boom, I am on the sofa wiped out barely able to keep my eyelids from closing or moving my arm to scratch my head. Yet I am not tired or sleepy, my mind is screaming to get up and do the fun melting things I love and enjoy. My body wins this time and I have to accept it and wait for it to lift. Luckily for the past 12 years of having this horrible illness, my crashes have always lifted. I am well aware of those with ME who have never come out of a crash and are trapped inside a body that is so fatigued they cannot move and are fully bed bound. This is something I worry about everytime I crash but am super grateful every time it lifts.

As I write this I am sort of self healing at the same time. This recent crash today was so bad, I feel just like the ghost in the illustration. So sad and frustrated and the rat is my illness taking over my life and stopping me getting real proper rest when I need it by more often than not keeping my mind active when my body shuts down.

The other cruel side of my illness is brain fog! My head feels muddled and I cannot think straight or communicate what I know I want to say, it just comes out wrong like I am a ghost on the other side screaming to be heard but I just can't get it out. Again the illness mocks me by making my fatigue lift yet my communication is all over the place.

I have to wait longer for the brain fog to lift before I can start typing this piece for you! Thank feck for spell check and grammar check on computers nowadays, am I right?

I will never give up while I have a chance at doing anything. I will take it with both hands, or whichever hand hurts the least at the time! I am writing this to self heal as always because writing has always been healing for me. I am also writing to you, to feel connections with you because I have never forgotten how I started my chronic illness journey. I went from lost, alone, scared and losing friends to finding my voice and utilizing my wax hobby to help as a creativity outlet to find you through social media and ultimately through my brand Bubbas Meltys. All a total accident but I am so glad I took a different path instead of falling at the barriers and limitations put up by my illnesses. I chose to pick myself up…slowly…carefully and keep moving forward around the walls my illnesses kept putting up and still do. I am not saying it is easy, and I fall back down so many times and sometimes think there is no way around this wall this time. But the part I am so proud of is the strength I didn’t know I had to keep getting back up again and again and again with your help. I genuinely love myself and you for that!!

Anyhoo I am now feeling back to my normal fatigue and pain levels where I know I can get things done with, so I am off to pack more orders which is something I truly enjoy to do and I am sure you feel my joy and love and gratefulness every time you open your orders!! I find it satisfying to pack them and always try to add some positive loving energy into each one.

Please do not be afraid to chat to me via email here one on one or via instagram dm, I am always happy to chat and get to know you more.

I hope you find your passion like I have because I promise it really does help especially on the bad days. But there is no hurry either, take your time and maybe it will find you, like mine did. A happy accident.

Do not forget I am here for you always and I genuinely want you to know you are not alone in this spoonie battle.

Lots of Love

Bubba x

#spoonie #spoonielife #goth #awareness #smallbusiness #spooniebusiness #spoonie business

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chelseyroseblog · 6 years

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WHAT CAUSES INFLAMMATION IN THE BODY

Hi Hi Hi!

Okay so hear me out. I just got back from vaca and we all wondered about why we get bloated, why we get acne, why we can't lose weight as quickly as our friends, and why our knees hurt so damn bad right?

There's obviously different reasons for all this ish and a million different ways to go about fixing it but I feel like one thing that a lot of people are overlooking is INFLAMMATION.

I mean, if you think about it...we talk about it almost on a daily basis on so many different levels. We've started using cryotherapy to reduce inflammation in our muscles, we use turmeric to reduce inflammation in the body, facial massage to reduce inflammation in the face, anti-inflammatory foods to reduce inflammation in our gut, yoga to reduce it..everywhere? And omega-3's to help with our heart health, brain function, and arthritis aka... inflammation.

HOLY HELL RIGHT? It's EVERYWHERE.

This is why I want to talk about it. OKAY SO.

WHAT IIIIS INFLAMMATION??

Well, there's different levels of inflammation but in any case, inflammation is point blank... a defense mechanism within the body. So when anything is harming or irritating a part of our body, the body tries...key word "tries"... to remove it.

The cool thing about inflammation is that it is a healing process soo we wouldn't heal without it. The shitty thing is that it sometimes (okay, a lot of the time) it can stick around longer than we need it to, at which point it can turn into an annoying issue orrrrr chronic pain. AWESOME......

But we're ALL dealing with inflammation in some way, shape or form so let's talk about

WHAT CAUSES INFLAMMATION?

Ugh, I feel like everything under the effing sun is a cause of inflammation. Here's a few:

+ Certain Foods

+ Synthetic Chemicals

+ Food Additives

+ Viruses

+ Bacteria

+ Parasites

+ Stress

+ Lack of Sleep (my fav.....eye roll)

Things like a sore throat, a cut or a burn (I just got one in Montana when the oven door was about to slam shut and I decided to catch it with my forearm...cool cool cool) anyway... those kinds of things can cause ACUTE inflammation.

Then there's other news called CHRONIC inflammation which means that inflammation occurs for months and even YEARS and it's caused by things like asthma, Crohn's Disease, arthritis, and ulcers...to name a few.

BUT inflammation can go from acute to chronic if we don't take care of it so just a reminder to be on your game when it comes to little injuries or health issues ya know?

PS I don't want to skim over the foods that can cause inflammation so let's talk about it.

Things such as:

- Sugar

- High Fructose Corn Syrup

- Artificial Trans Fats

- Vegetable and Seed Oils

- Refined Carbs

- Excessive amount of Alch

+ Processed Meats

etc.

This is why you may have heard of the ANTI-INFLAMMATORY DIET. Honestly, it's just a clean, normal diet. Get rid of eating an abundance of fast food and start eating healthy, clean, nutrient dense foods and obviously, you're going to feel better.

We all know that food allergies and toxins and bacteria from foods can make us feel some type of way but WHAT is actually going on?

Well...because of these things...foods are actually able to create inflammation through our intestinal wall. If your body is sensible to certain foods then your body sees it like a foreign invader and starts attacking it which, causes that inflammation.

So simply by reducing the intake of certain foods that our specific bodies don't agree with, we are able to start reducing inflammation.

How STRESS causes inflammation:

Ugh, the more I learned about this, the more I hated it. I've always known stress is horrible for us which is why I try to avoid it AT ALL COSTS but this was a healthy reminder for me and hopefully you as to why everything stressful from an argument with our parents to psychological stress is capable of producing inflammation in the body.

Stress actually produces a type of inflammation that has been shown to increase the risk of arthritis, cardiovascular disease and diabetes :( This is something that I talk to my clients about ALL THE TIME.

Stress is a HUGE issue for our health and directly impacts our ability to lose weight. When were under psychological stress, our bodies releases stress hormones as part of the fight or flight response. So it's SUPPOSED to be helpful in certain situations and definitely can be BUT because so many of us are stressed all day, this fight or flight response never turns off.

This equals CHRONIC STRESS which equals CHRONIC INFLAMMATION which is a MAJOR RISK FACTOR FOR CARDIOVASCULAR DISEASE.

And then to top it off, too much stress releases cortisol levels which, according to a study in 2012 by Carnegie Mellon University, too much stress dampens cortisol's ability to REGULATE inflammation. So now we're creating inflammation and making it harder on ourselves to control it.

How Health Problems Cause Inflammation:

Well for one, Obesity is not great for inflammation. And on top of that there's unhealthy eating which we touched on a little bit already. So just as a re cap... inflammation can be triggered by fat and blood sugar or by bacteria, allergies and other toxins.

WHY IS INFLAMMATION BAD FOR OUR BODIES?

I mean, I feel we should know right? No more ignoring the signs and letting little things get worse or pushing things off like everything is okay. I don't want to scare you guys haha but I feel like this info will be useful to you now and in the long term.

1. Immune cells can attack the digestive tract and create Crohn's disease with symptoms such as well...diarrhea, cramps and ulcers.

2. It can harm your joints such as the condition known as Rheumatoid Arthritis.

3. It's linked to heart disease aka HEART ATTACKS (You know how when you get a cut on your skin and then all those white blood cells rush over and it starts to become swollen? That's the same thing that starts to happen when there's a build up of fatty plaque in the arteries. It triggers chronic inflammation which can cause blood clots).

4. Whether you have inflammatory conditions due to obesity or a chronic condition, you're unfortunately at a higher risk for cancer. This includes lung, esophagus, cervix, digestive tract and others.

5. It's no bueno for your lungs. Inflammation in the lungs = a narrowing of the airways which makes it difficult to breathe. This could be due to asthma, smoking and being overweight.

6. It makes weight loss more difficult. Chronic inflammation can trigger hunger hormones AND SLOW METABOLISM. (WTF!)

Now we're eating more and burning less. Fantastic. This inflammatory response can also increase insulin resistance which raises your risk for diabetes and is linked with future weight gain.

ARE YOU SUFFERING FROM INFLAMMATION??

Most of the time if we scan our bodies from head to toe, we can find signs or symptoms that are signals that something we are being exposed to must be removed.

This could be:

+ Skin issues like acne, rashes, psoriasis.

+ Brain fog/Fatigue

+ Sinus Issues

+ Weight Gain

+ Allergies/Infections

+ Autoimmune Disease

The only thing I want to mention about this really quickly is....remember that inflammation is typically a RESPONSE to something else that is happening. So the best thing to do is to figure out WHY you have inflammation, and then focus on fixing THAT so that you can start reducing inflammation. Here's the basics:

- Are you eating a clean diet filled with nutritious foods?

- Are you getting enough sleep?

- Are you drinking enough water?

- Are you taking time to meditate and relax?

These last 4 months for me were SO insane as a lot of you know from following my long days and even longer nights on Instagram. I tried my best for the first two and a half months of my hectic schedule to make sure that my short nights of sleep were at least GOOD sleep. I tried to meditate for at least 10 minutes a day, drink more than enough water, and eat clean.

Before I knew it, I suffered from my first panic attack and realized that I'm not some magical human. I need sleep. I need time for myself. I need to de stress.

WE ALL DO.

So if you're feeling overwhelmed, stop. Clear your schedule. Stay home. Take yourself to the movies. Book a breathing class or a meditation yoga or something. WHATEVER.

Comment below if you have any questions or helpful tips for reducing inflammation!

#inflammation #anti inflammatory diet

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beautimous · 7 years

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A long explanation of my ridiculous year thus far

Hey, friends. I know there’s a few of you who follow what’s been up with my life, and I have played things fairly close to the chest for a while, mostly because I didn’t even know how to begin to talk about some of these things. So here goes - I’m breaking it into sections, mostly for my own convenience:

(WARNING: I am discussing some pretty heavy stuff here. There are detailed mentions of abusive relationships and health issues. DO NOT PROCEED if that is going to trigger you - I do not say that lightly, as someone who used to burst into tears seeing headlines for those “signs you might be in an abusive relationship” clickbait articles.)

My divorce, or how I realized I was married to an asshole:

I was married to my ex for five years. All of those years were spent experiencing intense mental and emotional abuse. It was the most insidious thing I could ever imagine; most of the time I was convinced that it wasn’t actually happening, that’s how manipulative he was. Complicating things was that fact that he did have some legitimate (as in doctor diagnosed) mental disorders, leading me to believe that those were the cause of his horrible behavior. (And by this, I mean HE lead me to believe they were, and I went for it.)

Long story short: they weren’t. Mental disorders can cause unhealthy behaviors that can contribute to an abusive dynamic (key word: CAN, not ALWAYS), but if you’re with someone who tries to blame their disorder for their abusive behavior, and refuses to take any responsibility for it, and then BLAMES YOU because you are triggering them and thus are in fact to blame for their abuse of you - It’s. Not. Your. Fault.

I finally snapped when I had to go on a trip for work, and he had a complete meltdown during which I did not feel safe leaving my children with him - just a few hours before I had to leave for the airport. I don’t know why, but that was the point at which everything I had been doing to deny my reality came crashing in. His treatment of me was not going to change, as he had promised many many times, and I had reached my breaking point.

That was two years ago. Leaving was a much longer and more painful process than I would like to admit. I had to detach slowly, and carefully, and keep up the facade that this was a mutual decision, and no, of course he’s a great guy but we just can’t be together anymore. I wish I could have just blown the lid off and told everyone exactly what I’d been going through, but to be honest, I didn’t need to. Everyone who knew him well, and who knew me well, knew exactly why I left even if I didn’t explicitly tell them. I see him sometimes, and HE knows exactly why I left. And those who didn’t know us well would never believe me. I don’t care, they don’t have to know or care; I’m safe, and happy, and my kids are safe and happy, and that’s all that matters to me.

The divorce was finalized in March. I rejoiced.

My health, or lack thereof:

Around the end of 2015, I started having random joint pain. I dismissed it as the winter blahs - I’ve always had some mild depression and a bit more pain when it’s cold and dark out. It wasn’t often, maybe once or twice a month, but bad enough that I’d spend a whole day in bed or stretched out on a recliner while my legs and hips throbbed.

Towards the middle of 2016 the fatigue was really starting to get to me. I blamed it on my depression, because I’d just gotten out of an abusive relationship, so of course I could expect some fallout with regards to my mental health. I went to my doctor and started on some antidepressants. Those helped slightly with my mood, but not the pain or fatigue.

By the beginning of this year I was so deep in the hole I didn’t even know which way was up. My boss called me out for slacking off. I was, no argument there - the brain fog was so dense that some days I could barely remember my passwords, let alone code out complex systems. I did what I have done in the past and cut myself some slack, let myself goof off until my motivation and clarity came back.

Except they didn’t come back. Not even after waiting for months.

In February I took a workshop with an extremely well known dancer. It was a whole weekend affair, Friday night through Sunday, including performing in a show on Saturday night. I had done this before with no issues. By Saturday evening I was sore and exhausted. I managed to drag myself to the show and perform, and then gave my Sunday workshop spots away to another dancer because I could not fathom getting up and dancing again the next day.

All along I had been checking in my with doctor. By this point she was on board with the fibromyalgia diagnosis. I had been screened for every possible fatigue-and-pain-causing disease known to man, and the results came up negative every time.

In March, I woke up with my right knee throbbing and swollen. I hadn’t done anything to it that I could recall, but the swelling was bad enough that I couldn’t bend it. I went to the doctor, who referred me to an orthopedic surgeon, who gave me the news: torn meniscus in my inner right knee.

I took a couple of weeks off from work. I had surgery to repair my knee. I took more time off from work. I got diagnosed with bursitis. I took a leave of absence from work. I got diagnosed with sciatica.

It’s become clear that I am not able to function at the level I was before. I’m not sure if I’ll ever get back to that level - I’m hopeful, but I also need to figure out how to live day to day at the level I am at. Not gonna lie, it sucks sometimes. I’ve found comfort in my family, and my spiritual practice, and have started reading tarot professionally. Life looks very different than it used to.

That’s the whole story. Every ugly detail. This is where I stand. Now I have to focus on where I’m going.

#so long i'm so sorry #abuse tw #mental health tw #chronic illness

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suchawonderfullife · 7 years

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Life after Hansa, my daily routine and other patient stories

See the photo above. That’s my daily and weekly routine since returning home. I’ve been home just 2 weeks now. Recovering your health is no quick fix or easy feat. If you’ve been chronically ill for years or decades, you’re looking at a marathon, not a sprint. Remember that. I had to make it clear to family and friends that upon returning home I’d be in for a long and hard slog of therapies, remedies, exercises and detox methods daily that would take up the majority of my time and energy. I had to explain that the 4 weeks of treatment I had would not “make me better” and I wouldn’t be returning home a healthier, brighter, happier version of myself. 12 years of chronic illness, with a body that sees dysfunction on a cellular level as it’s “norm” cannot be fixed in a mere matter of weeks. I’m looking at a recovery period of several months before I start seeing significant improvement in some areas and then years, for overall improvement of health. But I know I’m definitely on the right path.

I didn’t know it would be this much work. I’m kind of glad I didn’t know to be honest. I don’t want this to be off-putting to anyone considering treatment. But if you’re looking for a quick fix, a few pills to take, some antibiotics to pump into your system and be done with it or a few weeks of harsh treatment to then return to a life of wellness, you’ll never get better. It’s unrealistic. I think that when you first become ill, you’re not used to that horrible feeling of fatigue, pain, nausea, brain fog etc and you’re grasping at straws, trying those quick fixes to get better. After years of this, you wise up and see that those quick fixes aren’t going to be the true catalyst for your healing. I hope if you’re contemplating this kind of treatment, you see that something like this IS a catalyst to long-term healing.

Back to my daily routine shortly, firstly I’d like to acknowledge some of the patients I had treatment with at Hansa. I was fortunate enough to be there for a longer than normal period and therefore met many more patients. What I found most valuable was the patients who were returning for their 3rd, 4th or even 5th trip to Hansa.

I met a brother and sister who returned for their second round of treatment, after they completed their first round of treatment 3 months prior. They told me that the first 3 months when you return home from your first visit are quite challenging. Because you’re changing a lot of things in your body and drawing out bad toxins, this can make you unwell (but as a lymie aren’t we used to herxing and feeling crap anyway? So I’m OK with that). The sister said she had a kinesiologist back home who continually tested what she was treating under her Hansa Dr’s instructions and this Dr saw continual improvement. When she had her first day back at Hansa and they did their baseline testing (I forget what it’s called), everything her kinesiologist had said was improving, lined up with what her Hansa Dr said. Her top 10 list she had at her first visit had changed and now her issues that were less important back then, had shifted up to number 1 and 2. This means her biggest problems had been properly addressed and now lesser problems were seen as more significant in her body. She said her brother had even better improvements than she had had and they were both very hopeful.

I met a family from Canada who travel to Hansa once a year and all of them have 3-7 days of treatment. I met local families who were returning for their 5th+ time and had nothing but great things to say about how much Hansa had changed their life and improved their entire families health dramatically. I met patients on their first visit who came to Hansa after seeing friends or family get treated there and have such drastic improvement in their health, they knew it was their best option to recover from chronic illness too. I met others, but my brain is failing me at the moment. With all the returning patients I met, my constant thinking was “if this place wasn’t working, they wouldn’t be paying all that money to keep coming back.” It was very uplifting to speak to people who had already seen great results and were enthusiastic and hopeful to continue their healing through instilling their trust in the Dr’s at Hansa.

So towards the end of week 2 at Hansa I started to click how hard I was going to have to work when I got home, how long my recovery would be and the potential of the treatment making me worse. At the end of my fourth week I was more than ready to go home and get stuck into it all. But when I got on the plane at LA airport, about to embark on a 16 hour flight and thinking about touching down at Melbourne airport to my parents waiting to greet me, it dawned on me what I had just done. I can’t remember if I put this in my last blog or not.

I started crying on the plane. I went from this feeling of elation and excitement, to shock and fear. Kind of like after a traumatic event, when you’re running on adrenal throughout the experience and once it’s over, your brain is able to catch up and process what actually happened. My brain just went “holy shit, I just did 4 weeks of treatment on the other side of the world, with just my partner for support.” You won’t really get it unless you go through it yourself. I will tell you though, that it is a big fucking deal. It is probably the hardest and scariest thing I’ve done in my life and I am the instigator and driving force for getting myself there. No one pushed me to go, I had to push and do whatever it took to get myself there.

So if you know someone who is going or has gone overseas for treatment, that is not a decision taken lightly and it takes incredible courage and strength. Travelling whilst sick is frightening beyond comprehension. Then you throw in treatment that you have no idea how your body will respond to, you are in a foreign country with unfamiliar surroundings, dealing with all obstacles that get thrown at you without your regular support systems or comforts. So yeah, I cried for a good 10 minutes on the plane, just let it all out. Feeling overwhelmed, scared and dam proud of myself for doing what I did.

Coming home, I had to head out and start buying supplies for my daily routine. This included the whiteboard you see in the photo above. My partner drew up the grid with whiteboard tape and I added all the “activities” in. The first blue section are all my remedies, medications and supplements. “Tinctures x3″ means 3x a day, not 3 tinctures. I have 10 tinctures I must take 1-3x a day all up. The green section are my brain exercises for my limbic system. Below that in red are some of my longer exercises. Things like walking, grounding and colouring all have significance in helping repair the damage to my brain. The blue section on the right hand side are my detox therapies.

I’ve actually learnt how to do coffee enemas and that’s an experience in itself. I don’t think you know love until a partner has had to help you learn how to do an enema. Then the monthly column at the bottom is for things I need to do 1-2x a month. I’m waiting to get a referral to an EMDR specialist for repair my limbic system dysfunction, I don’t have the money yet for a lymphatic massage but it’s certainly something I need as my armpits and chest are aching a lot. Bioresonace is the treatment I have regularly with my local Dr and my Hansa Dr highly recommended I continue it. Doing all of these therapies on the board take up the majority of my day and 95% of my days total energy.

You may add them all up and think “well these are 20 minutes each, the brain exercises are only 10 minutes total, a bath/sauna is only 20 minutes, an enema is only 15 minutes so that’s about 4 hours of your day right?” No. Prepping for something can add an extra hour. My enema for example, it takes 25 minutes to boil the coffee in distilled water and then 70 minutes for it to cool to body temperature. I then have to set up the area to do it and clean up the equipment afterwards, plus add an extra 15 minutes of sitting on the toilet after the enema to make sure everything is out. You’re looking at it taking over 2 hours and 10 minutes just to complete this 1 detox therapy. For a liver wrap I have to lie with a hot water bottle on the caster oil wrap placed on my liver for 1 hour. That’s an entire hour I have to solely focus on that 1 therapy and cannot do anything else. For every meal I have, I have to take this spray and tablets before I eat anything that make my stomach quite upset, then I have to take a few bites of my food, stop, drink a large glass of water with apple cider vinegar and take a hydrochloric acid tablet and then continue eating. This takes some prepping and makes my meal times go for longer as it can take a while to down an entire glass of water with ACV in it. Then add into that your regular showering, getting dressed, preparing food, household chores and any other normal daily tasks and you’ve got a pretty jam-packed day. Now do all of this everyday for the next 4 months straight. I take my hat off to the patients with children and who work full time and have to fit all of this into their day as well.

So how’s it all going? Well I’m exhausted. I feel pretty shit at this moment in time to be honest. But I’ve had periods of improvement and great days too. I’ve noticed improved stamina on my good days. I’ve noticed that my body copes better with the physical exercises I have to do, such as jumping on the trampoline. It’s not as painful or leaves me as out of breath. When I first got home, trying to do everything everyday was wearing me down extensively. However, this is slowly improving. I believe my “shit” feelings are from the treatment doing what it’s supposed to, my body simply cannot detox fast enough. My brain is over sensitive most of the time, but I am noticing improvements in my anxiety, more clarity and better threat-perception (feeling calmer in situations that I would normally freak out about because I think it might make me sick) on my good days.

I don’t really have the energy to do many “extra” things at this point. I have left the house 4x this week, which is good. Some of the things were mandatory and made me worse, some of things were voluntary because I felt good. Some days it’s a struggle to do all my exercises and therapies because I’m just so fatigued and feeling unwell. These are the days I have to push through and remember my end goal. Some days I’ve woken up so exhausted after sleeping 9 hours, 2 hours later I’m back in bed as I can’t function. Some days I can only do half my therapies because I’m so unwell and yesterday I did no therapies and took no medications because my body simply wasn’t coping at all. I felt so toxic and horrible. My Dr told me to take a break for a day or two if my body is having a hard time, because feeling absolutely horrible is not the goal, there has to be a balance. Detox baths are the best! I have at least one everyday as it is the only detox therapy that brings me relief. Saunas, enemas and liver wraps make me feel more unwell at this point but I know from experience this will improve over time and they are necessary.

My brain has been affected by the treatments. Leaching out all the bad things in my brain, I’m having periods of severe rage and distorted thinking. Now that I know all about my limbic system problems and that my liver is my worst affected organ, I’m more mindful of my anger. It is really blowing me away how angry I get. How much anger my body must be holding onto. So when toxins are being pulled out of my brain or liver, it can come up as emotions and for me it’s usually rage or anger. I’m not an outwardly angry person though, I internalise it. So I seeth, stew, become bitter and resentful and “plot” revenges (that I never go through with, it’s just the fantasy of it feeds the angry part of me), I have arguments with people in my head and have pretty much zero patience for anything mildly inconvenient. A fellow Hansa patient who experiences the same symptoms of anger as I do said “it’s like I become the dictator of my life.” It’s true! My brain becomes so overloaded with toxins that my emotional responses are no longer in my control and I turn into this self-absorbed, entitled, mean, demanding person who you would never be able to please.

Not to worry though if you know me personally. I know when to remove myself socially when I am in this frame of mind and if I have to be social, I have a pretty good poker face. That doesn’t make me fake, as those emotional responses are part of my illness and not true to my character. It’s like if you head out clubbing or to a party when you have a cold. You don’t head out in your pj’s, slippers, tissues hanging out your nose, hair a mess and whining constantly. You dress up, put your makeup on, take a heap of pain killers and pack your bag with tissues. Then you do your best to forget you’re sick and your clubbing/party self comes to the forefront. Because your cold isn’t part of your true character, is it? It’s this annoying, unwanted, extra thing you have to put up with at that point in time. Then when you get home, you fall into bed and can go back to concentrating on feeling miserable and sick. Same thing when I’m angry. If you live with me, no doubt I can’t hide this side from you, but in public or social settings, I put my social self first and the anger in the background.

To sum up, I need the people in my life to be patient. I’m frustrated by how limited my energy is. I’m frustrated for feeling worse some days and being unable to complete basic daily tasks such as cooking for myself or household chores. I don’t know where I will find the energy to take myself to my extra appointments now, but it’ll work itself out somehow. It takes me days to save up a little extra energy to run an errand or go grab some groceries or put my clothes away that have been on the floor for a week. So I’ve lost most of my “social” energy as it is being used for my treatments and completing basic daily tasks. But getting better is my priority. I have 4 months to work my ass off, focusing on all I have to do to get well, before I return for my second round of treatment. I will not have spent all that money to get slack or use my energy on other things, to then not be well enough to do my therapies. It might be hard for a while, but that’s ok. I never back down from a challenge and I certainly deserve to get better. I know this is only temporary. In another 2 weeks time I’ll possibly be in a totally different place again or seeing more improvements. This isn’t guaranteed to be my reality for the next 4 months, I just have to take it 1 day at a time. Remember I was told the first 3 months are the hardest. This is only week 2. So it’s bound to get better.

Also, these are the therapies that have been personally prescribed to me based on my diagnosis’. Hansa does not have a cookie cutter approach. Friends I had treatment with have varying exercises and prescribed therapies/detox methods to myself because their issues are different. Do not think what I’ve shown you is what you will have to do if you have this treatment. Everyone is different.

Thanks to the people in my life who continue to support me with pure love and acceptance and who help me do whatever it takes to get well.

#hansa #hansa center #lyme #Lyme Disease #lyme treatment #chronic illness #chronic fatigue syndrome #chronic lyme

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newhologram · 8 years

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prettypeepers replied to your video: Got so riled up watching this because that pic on...

I don’t understand what the “one solution” is even supposed to be, he doesn’t give an actual solution at all! “Respect your body” isn’t a solution to an incurable disease, goodness

He’s talking about subluxation (which is why he showed before and after pictures of correcting the spine and explained that her symptoms went away) being the underlying source and/or aggravation of illness because of the pressure it puts on the nervous system which impairs the brain’s ability to communicate with the body and control proper organ function and regenerate.

What needs to be understood is that this doesn’t mean that ALL fibro patients, or people with the other associated illnesses have subluxation but what we know is that a lot of us DO have upper cervical curvature and thus, subluxation. Correcting subluxation is not going to be a complete magical cure-all but because of how it impairs the brain and body, when you correct it and get proper blood, nerve, and brain stem flow, your body will be better able to function overall, even with the presence of incurable illness. This is possibly an explanation for the fellow fibro patients I have heard of who only have minor but persistent muscle pains that go away when they take magnesium supplements and why I seem to have fibro so, so much worse to the point where it disabled me.

From What Doctors will NOT tell you about Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, changes after adjustment:

Physical Functioning increased from 58% to 85%

General Health improved from 35% to 55%

Vitality improved from 17% to 55%

Social Functioning increased from 40% to 70%

Mental Health improved from 50% to 70%

In addition, both the quality and quantity of sleep improved based on all testing and there was significant decrease in sleep medication usage. One of the most amazing changes was, the cortisol levels of the subjects ALL returned to a normal range. The reason cortisol is so important is that it is a hormone that when found in high levels indicates that the body is under chronic stress. People who suffer with fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome, both suffer from poor sleep quality. When someone does not get into the deep sleep cycle (REM), their body produces high levels of cortisol.

Amazingly, following Upper Cervical Care their individual bodies showed a quantifiable change in cortisol levels that indicates their bodies were no longer chronically stressed.

Since my adjustment I have been sleeping deeply for over 3 hours a night when previously I got 0-2 for basically the past 10 years (I have a Garmin and I keep a very close eye on my sleep because the fibro and narcolepsy have made sleeping very very hard for me). I wake up feeling recharged and sharp. I have a sense of calm and well-being that I’ve never felt before, ever, despite the pain and fatigue I am still experiencing as my body is now shifting and adjusting to this sudden flow of communication and lack of a need to compensate. My organs are lighting up one by one and will continue to do so the more my spine takes its time shifting and easing the pressure off of my nervous system.

What I also need people to understand, because this does sound pretty woo and too good to be true, is the condition I was the night before I got the procedure done. It was 3.5 weeks in on the worst fibromyalgia flare up I have ever had. The pain was horrible, I got down to 102lbs, I was unable to eat or stop throwing up, I was unable to stand for more than a few minutes, I missed several days of work, I was also suicidally depressed again which is what usually happens to me during the worst kinds of flare ups. My dad was going to take me to the ER because I was falling apart physically and mentally. I was literally screaming crying last Wednesday night. It was very, very bad and I was very, very scared again. My dad called the closest atlas orthogonal chiropractor out of desperation because he was also terrified for me and my rapidly worsening condition.

Since she adjusted me I have also had zero depression or brain fog. I’ve never felt such clear thoughts or felt like I am “plugged” in before. I feel like a real person for once.

I have a detailed timeline that puts things into perspective and really shows how much sense this all makes: http://newvagabond.tumblr.com/post/155953775022/news-atlas-subluxation-and-chronic-illness I will keep updating it throughout my recovery.

#reply #personal #long post #prettypeepers #atlas subluxation

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psi-psina · 8 years

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Hi. :) You don't know be but I've been following you for a little while now and since I saw your posts talking about Graves Disease I wanted to ask you about it. I'm a 19 yr old girl, and I was diagnosed with it a few months ago and started on PTU. I wanted to ask, what was your experience with doctors and medication like? You had to have your thyroid removed? I feel worried about how this is supposed to be managed long-term because my doctors can be quite dismissive. If you don't mind. :)

OH MY GOD

DEAR ANON PLEASE HEED THE FOLLOWING LEARN FROM MY MISTAKES

So this is my experience and for the LOVE OF GOD don’t let this happen to you.

I was diagnosed with graves disease at the age of 14, showing symptoms of fatigue, tremors in my hands, exophthalmos and a slight goitre. I was tested for sleep apnea before i was diagnosed. Once diagnosed, my mother took me to a naturopath rather than an endocrinologist (i was a child, i had no control over the situation PLEASE DON’T DO ANYTHING THIS STUPID) 😩. It didn’t go well. I was given a tincture of iodine and various herbs (including licorice :/), which i had to take for about 3 months. it did nothing for me and my symptoms steadily got worse until my mother had to take me back to the doctor. My blood work showed a significant worsening of my condition; my T3 & T4 were both far higher than they had been before.

I was put on Neo-Mercazole which I remained on periodically over the next 9 years. You cannot remain on thyroid suppressants indefinitely due to their nature and bastard side effects (expelling giant blood clots through your nose? horrific), which got gradually worse the longer I had to take them. I don’t know how your doctors are managing your PTU but be vigilant. You NEED to aim at getting in remission. I was monitored closely while taking NM over that first course, and then as my hormone levels returned to normal I was weened off it. I was okay for 2 years, and then relapsed when I was 17. I was put back on NM and monitored until my levels returned to “normal”, then I relapsed again when I was 20.

after this I remained on NM pretty much for the following 3 years, but it’s effectiveness started to wane and many of the diffuse symptoms (especially anxiety, palpitations, insomnia, tremors, goitre, exophthalmos etc) simply weren’t going away even when my blood work showed I was within a supposedly normal hormonal range, and I just slowly went downhill over those 3 years.

this is huge problem with regulating thyroid disorders like this, your hormones are measured only in your blood work but T3 and T4 are heavily protein-bound hormones, meaning it’s presence in your blood IS NOT always consistent with it’s presence in your other tissues, where it is able to accumulate (not indefinitely without detection, but enough to give you symptoms). Suppressants just didn’t work for me long-term. They couldn’t help my thyroid regulate my metabolism over an extended period of time, the thyroxine in my body just kept accumulating. Basically, the moment I relapsed when I was 17, I was fucked. I was not aware of this at the time, obviously. At the time I had absolutely no idea what was going on.

the events at the end of my Final Relapse that led up to my surgery were serendipitous and bizarre. I was travelling to Japan in the October (2013) for a few weeks (which i flat out should not have been doing lmao) and got an appointment with my doc because i needed to fill another script for NM before I left, because i was about to run out. So i went and got the script and then when I went to fill it at the pharmacy, I couldn’t get the NM. There was an international shortage of Neo-Mercazole and I was flying out of the country the literal next day and I couldn’t get any ANYWHERE. PTU was still available but I couldn’t get that with a script for NM either. So I had no medication for most of those three weeks.

When I got home I booked another appointment as soon as I could get one and went back to work. Got another blood test to see what was going on and finally got some PTU. A couple of days later I came down with a cold. My immune system was shot and I was struggling to do things like get out of bed and walk up stairs at this point so I called in sick to work on the monday because felt so ill, and made another doc appt for that afternoon because i needed a medical certificate.

I went in to the doctor expecting to walk out with a med certificate, and asked her about my bloodwork. She opened the bloodwork and looked at it, looked at me, then took my temperature and pulse and immediately called my endocrinologist. My T3 and T4 levels were so high they were not measurable, i was feverish and hazy and my resting heart rate was 160-170 bpm. She told me I needed to go straight to emergency because I was at risk of thyroid storm (at which point I just burst into tears lol) and she called ahead to the hospital to have me admitted immediately, and that was that. I was taken to the hospital and was monitored there for 4 days and given several medications to try to flush some of the excess thyroxine from my body to make it safe enough for them to cut my thyroid out, which happened four weeks later.

So aside from the more diffuse symptoms of anxiety, depression, insomnia, full body tremors, exhaustion, goitre and exophthalmos, I was admitted in emergency with acute symptoms like fever, tachycardia, chest pain, hypertension, muscle weakness, bloody diarrhea, peripheral edema and fuck knows what else. :/ None of these things really abated over the weeks leading up to the surgery, and I honestly can’t describe what it was like to wake up from it almost asymptomatic after dealing with these things for months and years. It was like waking up in a completely different body.

If you’re wondering how I could have let things get that bad, how i didn’t realise just how serious it was, you need to understand. You need to understand how gradually all of this happens, it built up over a period of years, and when you live with a chronic illness for that long you literally just get used to feeling like shit, so if something else shitty starts happening you’re already so tired it hardly even registers. It doesn’t strike you as particularly abnormal because it all becomes normal. That’s the most dangerous thing about it. Not to mention, the sicker you get with Graves, the less capable you are of assessing your own situation; the anxiety and exhaustion and insomnia and horrible hazy brain fog you’re in every single day make it completely impossible to think clearly.

SO THE MORAL OF THIS IS, for the love of God, be careful, and take it seriously. It is extremely serious. I did not take it seriously enough for years because I was young, active and otherwise healthy which gave me a threshold for tolerating it that was far too high. Don’t dismiss your symptoms, don’t let your doctors dismiss your symptoms, ESPECIALLY the mental symptoms. Be aware of all possible and potential symptoms so you can actually recognise them for what they are, along with all the potential side effects of PTU.

Get blood work done EVERY THREE MONTHS. THREE MONTHS, not six, not twelve, every three months. Other thyroid disorders, you might be able to be a bit more chill about, graves you fucking cannot. You cannot.

Read and get as much information about this as you can. Heed how your diet is going to effect this, because like any endocrine disorder, it will.

Elaine Moore is useful. (Read the forums) This is useful. Reading patient forums about people’s experience with it and how they manage it is invaluable, it’s far better than reading blogs that are usually dogmatic and trying to sell you stuff. patient.info is also a good resource for information.

Make sure you have a good GP and ESPECIALLY a good endocrinologist who works WITH you. Most endo’s DO NOT specialise in thyroid disorders, most of them specialise in diabetes and only have a middling knowledge of thyroid issues. It’s absolutely crucial to find an endo who specialises in thyroid disorders. Find one, if you can. Otherwise just crowd source the information yourself, print it and take it to your doctors yourself. Because honestly, the cost of not doing that is just....not worth it.

This isn’t supposed to scare you or anything, it’s a god damn burden but there are plenty of people with Graves who achieve remission or find ways to manage it over long periods of time, it’s a highly individual disease. So I really hope you are able to do that. :) TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.

#Anonymous

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