#i acc hate the way i look n who i am as a person

[graevs666]

i feel so ugly

[sanest-bsd-delegate]

IRL MEETS WITH DAZAI, SIGMA AND FYODOR

Headcanon: How I imagine you and the boys meeting after being online friends Genre: Crack A/N: Still questioning why i tried writing this... Warning? Bad grammer and 0 proofread →Masterlist

Dazai:

You both pretty much met on twitter when you were concerning who was behind the chuuya hate acc 🤩 I mean who can hate chuuya?

you probably were a new member in the mafia for not knowing about THE Dazai oSaMU

or you were a member of Detective agency dense enough to know that they both were infact enemies and not enemies soon to be lovers 🤩🤩😔🏳️‍🌈

OR You were a freelancer fresh college passout student who was wasting their time online getting blocked by 12 year old kids 🤩😋that was until you accidentally befriend him

successfully had 6th month friendaversy. 🤩🤩

when you both exchanged your place of residence you were shocked to know there are actually useless people in Japan apart from you

OR You were just concerned to know that he used to stay up late at night to talk to you while you message him in between work hours. 🤩🤩Dazai is such a romantic mood NGL

AHHHH Its the day of THE friends meeting.

You lowkey regret befriending him.

He probably sends you discord kitten memes and his hand pics for no reason. [BUT CSN WE TALK ABOUT HIS HANDS-!!?]

Mf once tried to video call you when you specifically told him NOT to.

He was blocked for a whole week before someone named 'iaminlovewithdeathtoes' spammed you.

🤡honestly you realised you both never shared your name, so pretty much to arrived at the meetup place, thinking of ways how to say 'chuuyahater6fttall' and knowing him, he prob would have you come over the agency cause bitch is lazy asf.

Dingdong you arrive at Yokohama or pretty much at the agency 🤩🤗except you were shitting in your pants cause what the actual fuck. So the person you talked with, who encouraged all kind of illegal stuff and told you to shoplift and send a pic was actually a detective??? Nah dawg you wished he was a lowkey an accountant cause which detective will have so much time to be online and chat?

boi you were wrong. And to have cherry on the top, you bumped into a brown coat bearing man who looked like he was high on nuts. But damn he looked hot

did you say "sir please scream me without the s 🥺" to yourself? Did he hear it? probably

🤩boom your headphones got disconnected for a moment and the whole agency went silent as the lyrics of "good lookin" started to play.

The man infront of you laughs before kidnapping you and dragging you out of the agency, a queue of screams and shouts for the man to comeback and you desperately trying to switch off your phone. (🤩🤗The lyrics were blasting through the area)

honestly you didn't mind as long as he turns out to be those Wattpad overprotective mafia bosses 🤩🤩🤗🌟 so you can have ur Y/N moment

'Help I am getting kidnapped by brown coat man and am left all alone' you typed, as the three dots indicated that chuuyahater typing before he replied, 'I am the man'

The way you audibly screeched as your turn back and your hand automatically made a way to his face to give him a slap. (🤩You heard laughing in the background, it was chuuya fyi)

"Aww belladonna, I thought you loved me" "THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU KIDNAP ME AND MAKE ME STAND ON TOP OF A HIGHASS BUILDING" "But you agreed to do it once we meet!"

Oh he was serious when he said that 🤡

You ran away as fast as you can away from him, as you typed

'you are a bitch you know that?' 'And you are really beautiful you know that?'

😍🤩 you were greatful to get away from him, except he was knocking at you door (hotel door if u came from other part of the world) at 3am playing THAT part of the song "redbone by childish gambino" (iykwim) outside your door

Sigma

you both honestly never befriended.

You accidentally messaged him asking him to deliver you a pizza

🤩and when he replied with 'wrong number' you lost your shit. 'The fuck you mean wrong number you son of a-' 'Dont have one?'

Sigma maybe anxious in real life but online? Pretty sure he is a full on sassy sarcastic not so sweet Sigma (respectfully)

You both might have had a very professional verbal conversation over phone that day.

He and you might have bonded yet again when you, my dear reader accidentally send him a meme you were suppose to send someone else (guess who) and Sigma lost his shit.

Why was na unknown number, with memory of a snail sending him 20 pictures of a fisheye doll at 3am in the morning?

'Are you okay-?' He probably asked, 'Do I look sane?' you probably answered.

😭 but lowkey thinks that you both exchanged your insta Ids or smthg.

😡😡He didn't even acknowledge your following and never followed you back. 😔 rip your follower count

You spam him with reels and he? REPLIES TO ALL OF THEM LIKE GOOD BLESS THIS MAN TO RUN A WHOLEASS CASINO AND STILL HAVE TIME TO WATCH YOUR REELS

You would rant to him and he will listen 100%

Pretty sure you never tired to meet up. It was your ass being dragged by one of your friends to accompany them to a flying casino and get bankrupt.

Prob msged him saying how edible the manager of the place you went looked😭😭 (you didn't tell him u went to a casino so)

He replies with 'go get your man and stop telling me details about his hands'

And so you did, pretty much used your luck and became the star of Casino😡😡

Society validation? Nah 👎 but Casino manager acknowledge? Yah 👍

Now the thing is, Sigma probably got really indulged on how you managed to beat records that he spent time doing a background check rather then opening his phone and seeing your 99+ texts.

You on the other hand? Went wild. Your online friend wasn't responding!!!?? 😡😡 and you were telling him the tea how the manager put his hand on your shoulder acknowledging you.

Little did you know, you were so blinded texting 'the casino manager' You failed to realise you bumped into him.

phone drop, heart stop screen crack, gave you a heart attack.

worst part? The 'Manager' picked up your phone, looking down at the chat only to see his pfp and his contact named "Pizzah Guz" and your half written text of 'Where are you, I miss talking to| '

You were whereas unsure whether to feel embarrass or cry. You see his face only to realise the amount of shock you gave to the manager.

😭😭Pretty sure it took some time for him to cool down.

BUT I THINK he totally appears in front of your room, with a pizza guy costume and a box full of pizza, messaging you 'Open your door'

You were a little freaked out by his message. I mean Imagine texting a random guy and the only thing you know about him is that he is not a pizza guy and he tells you to open your door?

You open your door to see the manager in a pizza delivery guy uniform, a pizza in his hands while he holds his phone together, before he hands it over to you, before your phone notification tings, your online friend sends an image capturing 'Pizza delivery'

You fainted on the spot of pure embarrassment and realisation when you realise you were texting the manager while simping on him and describing details.

Or you just take the pizza and close the door, switch off and throw your phone on the bed and eat the pizza while the realisation hits.

Fyodor:

You both probably met on discord while bullying middle schools for their pfp choices 😭

10/10 had bombing conversation 👁️👄👁️ that is until you realise he was serious about it.

You be joking about how you will learn hacking to hack him and that moment all your dms get 'Join the rat cult' Picture.

😭😭please idts you met physically…like the possibility of fyodor arriving at your doorstep while you are half asleep eating a pizza and watching TV is insane.

Imagine you peep through the peephole and see fisheye fyodor 🤩🤩 10/10 scared

Online friend? Nah man he is your offline terrorist. That was until his wholeass body blewup and the only thing that was left was his arm from which he used to type to your responses from.

10/10 Power of Love and friendship

I feel like whenever you both VC, your silly self will try to use the soundboard and he probably vibe to it.

You both accidently made a cult.

Fyodor NGL prob just stalked you out of boredom.

Nikolai probably be backreading your chats and the next day you have a new coworker named "Fyolaya"

Honestly there is a possibility that fyodor has zero interest in meetup and then bam Nikolai scopes you in the middle of your work and drop you on fyodor's lap🤩

Imagine the tension when you, a average worker in the society lands on the lap of one of THE Doa members

Y/N x hot mafia boss who kidnaps Y/N accidentally cause Y/N met his man au? Terrorist edition?

You living a Wattpad life? Possibilly

A/N: Look i am sane

TAGLIST: @averagehisoilluenjoyer, @high-on-dazai @ruru-kiss Join or remove your user here.

[liaa--qb]

This might sound overly dramatic, but I'm so sad and disappointed right now because of all those horrible leaks. I know they still might be false, but honestly I believe that save for some details, they are mostly true. There are few things that sadden me the most :

1. Helaemond not being canon. I know that this ship has been controversial, especially among TG, but it really had a lot of potential and was one of my favourite (still is). And I don't care what antis say, there were a lot of hints and undertones in s1 about helaemond, more than for Alicole and look, Alicole apparently becomes canon in the worst possible way. Which brings me to the second point -

2) Alicole being canon. Don't get me wrong. I like this pairing, but it would be much better and more in character if they never acted on their feelings. Not to mention that two sex scenes in ep 1 (if the leak is true) will seem too much and out of nowhere. And to include it in B&C scene with helaena walking in on them having sex right after Jaehaerys is brutally murdered is an atrocious writing decision. F*ck you Condal and whoever is responsible for this.

3) B&C made into a joke. According to the leaks, Helaena won't be given a choice, there will be some upsetting details about getting naked the children and so on..and to have her walk in on her mom having sex with a member of a kingsguard.. Again, f*ck you Condal.

4) Aemond and the brothel madame. Why would he go to the same woman who SAed him when he was 13? And he obviously felt uncomfortable around her in ep 9. And to make him cry while naked in fetal position...I also read on reddit that they will include a mommy kink with breast sucking and whatnot... but this seems way too much and is probably someone's shitty headcanon. At least I hope it is, because if true I'll vomit.

And this is only the first episode. Idk, if this turns out to be true, I'll probably stop watching and it sucks since I really like this universe and was excited about s2. Two years of waiting and for what.. Not only the shortened season but also all this garbage. We'll see in few days, I guess, but I'm not hopeful. Anyway, thanks for reading my rant. I would love to hear your opinion on this.

Ya the way heard about leaks is sooo😂😂😂😂😂😂😭😭😭☠️ wtf they have done 😬☠️☠️

IT'S MY ANSWER FOR ALL QUES LIKE THIS FILLED IN MY INBOX CZ I GOT SAME QUES FOUR TIMES in different ways😅, so I am answering for them all but it's but long

See it's a kind suggestion from me very sweetly that it's better if you are not expecting something high from makers n watching it without any expectations because if we are hating just because they did some ships wrong then acc to that alot of changes were already done since s1, like Rhaenicent , Larys alot of things but we never had problems.

Listen I am kinda sad also but you know what..... be happy because you know Ewan and Phia are shipping helaemond🥰. They acknowledging it , loving it and adding some own elements to this ship is really amazing of them moreover just for a fan service.

Like "do it for helaemond" 😭 they are so adorable. See I knew very well that it's not gonna happen, I had a very less surity and that's how exactly it turned out.

But you know what not a single ship is going to have any good romantic future 😂 either all of them even Daemyra main centre couple is not being done well by the makers. What can you expect for others ?

because I knew helaemond had lit ceslu potential but it has to be done correctly and Ik hotd makers would ruin it or make it bad even if it was shown canon look at Alicole now. So being non canon yet addressed by makers and actors who specially said they would act on it for fan service is a kind of little serve.

To me it's like I won ( but at what cost 😭😅) but also winning well wasn't there on cards ever. Every ship is going to be destroyed by makers. see what they did with Helaegon(ik it wasn't any good already) but like I am crying on leaks ( I thought atleast this s2 helaegon would be done but better for Aegon's sake but no😭)

All ships barely are going to have small amount of time without any romantic bullshit, just in one or two scene then seperating apart n dying 😂☠️ as I said earlier so to me Ewan phia trying their own things for helaemond in background in genuinely a small cake😂. ( Atleast we have some scenes with them, idk if there would be😑😬 not expecting much)

One thing I really hate that you know they gave Juan and Cesare arcs to Aegon n Aemond making their pair up way intresting to watch. I really wish that Helaena was given the same authority or bit of freedom of exploring herself like Alicent. Sorry if someone as strictly religious like Alicent can do it then it was way easy for Heleana. And whole Borgias recreate would have been so interesting to watch.

I wish I could see Helaena scolding, shouting at Aemond for starting all this shit n hating Aegon for being a useless father after b&c. There should be a sense of of cheating or fraud when she sees her mother who claims to be a religious person but doing everything against it while she had to suffer her whole life with bad marriage.

Not seeing her any active is what which annoys me so much.

they gave her dreamer arc for Nothing just being ignored by her important family members.Phia should be awarded for her acting n carrying heleana despite of their dirty writing.

The thing is Helaemond would have been a shock and surprise more fitting for audience, making Helaena active with this part instead of doing Alicent dirty an don't even ask how I am feeling about Helaena catching Alicent and Cole . It was sooo😭🤦🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️😑

And most ironically funny thing is that same thing happened with Borgias, Cesare and lucrezia were not canon initially and never meant for canon, both actors said we will just play into into it but when I rumours started later runners had no choice to make it canon for later season 😂

So never loose hope or stop loving or hyping any of your ship or helaemond I would say because Ryan can pull any stunt any time. The way he is going I don't think he gives much f about book canon, he is doing anything he wants😂😂

So who knows... if he ever liked Helaemond he can pull it anytime 😂(I m not kidding) bcz Alicole fucking specially between b&c since s1 is so ooc I could not even describe. I am not even hardcore FNB fan but they quite messed up Alicole angst and guilt arc which could have been so beautiful. It's so inconsistent with their parts from S1 like what ?🤦🏻‍♀️

And I hate that blood & cheese should have been how Helaena is suffering instead I am afraid whole light will be thrown on Criston/Alicent fucking reveal.

no couple is gonna have any beautiful story so it's kind of better if they are just playing with helaemond behind back.

Atleast there is so much for Helaemond content and on other hand my other ship Rhaemond is literally carried by lil warriors Leo and Eva 😭 on their shoulder with that one scene for all seasons. I never gonna see them interact again😿.

And yes I also hate how Aemond is sent to back his abuser. Like they could have used any other female if they have to show his milf attraction or some kind of guilt kink something but not his groomer. It sucks he is finding comfort in her arms. Like these show runners forgot how all these characters were exactly in season1 bc such changes r so😭

Overall I would say don't leave the show just in terms for ships to be endgame as not a single ship is going to have any happy ending or any romantic drive in HOTD main focus will be on Rhaenyra, Alicent getting depressed and Daemon will be haunted 😭 but still it's your choice in the end😅 I am no one to say anything.

Now I am mainly watching for Aegon & Aemond n how other new entries like Alys, Alyn, Cregan or Addam are gonna introduced ( well who knows if Daeron is also gets his Cameo in the end )

if I am being honest just like the way I started this show after reading book without having any great expectations. It works better that way and may be for Ewanphia Crumbs for few secs if they don't cut their scenes of which I have very much doubt.

( while how I wanna see Ewan phia/Phiwan crumbs on screens in delulu mind😭😭 :

Like this is how I wanted Helaena to jump n beat the shit out of Aemond after b&c n that's how it should be bc that's his brother not any stranger, she had full right to , but there... it's complete opposite :

[crazylittlejester]

bro. i am in the same boat as you.

asfhdjkss seeing you stress and become disappointed about whumptober is making ME FEEL THE SAME......

feeling upset about your writing and all the prompts not being correctly put down into words can be very hard and complicated!! i get it!!!

it's totally normal to feel that way and i assure you, it's okay!

just know that, even if it is your own decision, you don't have to feel obligated to do all 32 days. that's a bunch of work for someone and a whole lot of planning and writing and that can effect someone's energy and mental health. i appreciate your effort in trying to do it though! but please, don't get worried about producing so many mediocre fics, at the end of the day you're still writing things and im proud!!!

i saw your post about this and immediately felt bad so i hope this can help you feel even a little better... even so, i will be looking forward to anything you end up writing! you are such a fantastic author, never forget that. <3

thanks man 🫶 /gen

i have really been struggling a lot lately with this, and it’s been very hard to not get angry with myself over it because I feel like I haven’t been able to write in months and I’ve been struggling with hating most of what I write these days and I get so incredibly anxious to post anything because I feel like my ability to write and the quality of my fics has deteriorated sooo much. I’ve had my ao3 acc since 2018 and every year I’ve kinda made a tradition almost of orphaning everything I write and starting fresh at the start of the new year because I dislike the vast majority of what I write but I realized a few months ago that I don’t think I can do that this year- this is certainly the most attention my fics have ever gotten and I think at least one person would come yell at me in my asks if i disappeared off the face of the earth never to write for LU again allddkkd

its just very hard not to feel upset about being burnt out for so many months, and it’s hard to see how engagement has been down and have to remind myself it’s not because i suck, it’s literally just because i’ve been making less content. of course engagement would be down, the main reason most people interact with me is BECAUSE I write or do analysis posts or make content, so if im not putting out as much as i used to then that tracks and makes sense, but it’s hard to stop the intrusive thoughts sometimes. It is certainly a fight to not feel useless when I can’t do the one thing I’m supposed to be doing with this blog

anyways… it makes me really happy that there are at least a few people who will read whatever i throw up onto ao3, and all of you who regularly read the things i write and send me asks n such genuinely make me so happy. all of you are awesome

and thank you for this, it was really kind and sweet of you. i hope you have a good day, remember to take care of yourself and get some water n food 🫶

*wet cough* anyway *sniffle* y’all wanna see my tav…? /j *kicks a rock*

[ladymorghul]

really am not trying to feed into ship wars but the way screenshots of her looking at aegon’s box got thousands of likes on X but anyone posting the still of aemond and helaena before 2x06 got qted to hell 😭 what is going on here! you go to these accounts and all they have is posts about tom exclusively 🤔 calling aegon pookie 🤔 haven’t mentioned helaena outside of him once 🤔 but being excited for a scene with another brother is male centric. alrighty

for some of these people she's an accessory, that's why. i mean thay can do whatever you want, but do it quietly without the constant yapping about helaemond.

even today, a nasty source acc started hurling insults at helaemonds out of nowhere just because they were in a pissy mood.

and should i bring up again that we're sharing a fandom with a helaeg*n who in response to helaemond said we're godless people who glorify sexual depravity and that we don't believe or understand the sanctity of marriage. and i don't remember if it was the same person who said that some women have morals and stay with their husbands even if they cheat/are bad to them.

like i'm sorry i will let a "fuck helaemond i hate helaemond" slide as general anti behaviour that you meet in every fandom but if you sound this much like a fundamentalist tradwife that you could be a septon on hotd then it reaches outside of casual shipping discourse imo.

[delusion-of-negation]

There was this one post I saw floating around some weeks ago, that even specific types of discrimination, can be experienced by people not of the "target" group. Best way I can explain the several paragraphs long post was eg: A cis woman who looks masculine can still experience transphobia because ppl around her will view her as "not being a real woman" because she looks masc. Even though she's not trans, she's perceived as trans and the discrimination she experiences is bc ppl think she's trans

re

sorry it's taken me a couple of days to get back to you on this, I needed to pick up meds and the nearest chemist is across the industrial estates and council estates (where I live), so it was an effort to get there, as per usual, because I can't drive. funnily, or rather, annoyingly, in the time since, I actually saw a post saying people who are talking about this sort of thing (ie people not of groups can experience that discrimination targeted at them) are proof that we aren't of said group and only care about the issues when they affect us and think it's acceptable when said group is suffering and/or that they deserve to suffer. and I was like?? no? obviously that's not how that fucking works. I can talk about the obvious fact women can be victimised by misandry without me being a woman, hating men, or only caring about it when things affect me personally. it's the whole "I care about animal rights, I probably am not a llama" thing. but yeah, just because someone doesn't actually have x trait doesn't mean somebody yelling shit about how they'll kill them for it stops being a scary experience, racists don't go "oh, my mistake king, carry on" if you pull out an ancestry test and say they got your race wrong. transphobes in bathrooms won't believe the bearded lady when she says she is actually cis. and the violence they experience is equally worth a conversation about, because it's the same conversation, it's still talking about racist and transphobic systems, and the nuances regarding how they affect people's daily life, and there's still talk about the primary targets of said discrimination within that too. while I'm here, I've been saying this a while, like here's one post:

[florencicle]

rant again i need to stop using this acc as a rant acc and start being funny again

my tummy's been hurting recently from anxiety. i've woken up everyday for the past kets day like 3 days? 4? maybe 5 actually but whatever

i've been talking to my ex ex (i keep saying this bcuz it's the ex before my most recent ex) and like we've been talking a lot. like everyday since monday. nonstop texting n calling. we spoke for so long yesterday on the phone literally from 8 pm and i didn't go to sleep till 6 am. he's changed. a lot. like. he's a brand new person but deep down he's still the same guy that knew everything about me. knows when im feeling overwhelmed. he specifically yelled at everyone to stop talking and shut up bcuz i was overwhelmed cuz i'd stopped talking, then texted me to make sure i was okay, didn't stop texting me stupid shit for about an hour just to make me laugh, and then when i did finally laugh he was like there it is there's ur pretty smile. then he did the thing where like he'd send a message and just wait. look at the camera immediately to see my reaction and wait and he was always waiting with such anticipation. he's willing to learn about all my new hyperfixations which is .. new behavior. he's genuinely caring now. is thinking ab moving to my city for college and asked if i could show him around, and if not then "that's okay as long as we'd be in the same area." then he comforted me when i'd left for a little bcuz i'd gotten super super stressed out about being back into the friend group after such a long time and he was like "none of us hate you and i promise we're laughing with you not at you. i know how you get sometimes and i don't mean that offensively, we were just close before, you know? but anyways i know how you get and we don't hate you, especially not me."

it sucks. i'm so conflicted. this guy fucked me up really really badly. but he's very clearly a new person and he is genuinely very hating of how he was before and how he treated me, (he started crying thinking ab it.) nd yes it's tthe same guy but it's like falling in love with him all over again. it's like. i'm falling in love with him again for the first tie and it's nice. n i can tell he feels the same.

but i know a lot of my friends r gonna b very angry at me if i get back w him bcuz of just how messed up i was after the breakup but like. i don't know what to do and i can't just. stop myself. from liking him. especially when he's doing everything right this time and i know it's not in a manipulative way bcuz he genuinely seems nervous. like i don't think someone who was trying to use me again would b generally really nervous to speak to me. (or maybe he is i dunno!)

idk. it's stupid and i've gotta stop using this acc as a rant acc ab my love life bur blegh. i gotta put it somewhere.

[extrakuli]

Execution

rock’s

.zhongli, childe

A/N. angst time baby >:) writing angst is so fun ngl …(･◡･) requests are open btw! also if you’ve seen this before then this is from my other acc that I deleted! i’m just reposting them lol

.angst

zhongli—

He wished he didn’t have to, he wished this would go away—that there would be peace again. But only destruction would happen if he didn’t do his job. He tells you this—but he knows your not listening. Especially with the hatred and tears in your eyes as you back away from him in your palace.

“Leave! You don’t have to do this—your spitting nonsense, morax!” you yell, still backing away—yet he moves closer, with guilt and remorse in his eyes, tears building up in the process.

He stops in his tracks when you back up in to the wall. He contemplates. “It’s you—or your people.” his eyes are lidded as they look down at you. You let out a small offended gasp, but you quickly clench your jaw, and your hands turn in to fists.

You walk over to him and whisper in to his ear— “I still love you..but you deserve to live with the guilt of having to kill your own significant other..” he gulps, he can feel your tears burning his skin. He hates it, he hates you—why do you make him feel like this!?

He looks down at you as you smile up at him. “I never loved you” he looks straight ahead as he says this—and plunges his spear in to your heart. Blood spouts from your mouth as you fall in to his arms. A dead, cold look in your eye, as your body lays cold in his arms.

A sacrifice that had to be made…

childe—

Oh..how he hated you..or, more really, how he wish he hated you right now. But the tears running down his cheeks, and how he yells and screams your name betrays his hatred—He is angry, at you, for pulling something this stupid.

He watches you drop your claymore, walking towards the ocean at the mass destruction he has pulled. He should have listened—he should have listened when you told him not to pull this “ruling the world” act. It was selfish. and he knew. These are the consequences of his own actions.

He watches the water beast stare down at you, he hears your voice one last time—

“If I give you my life—Spare everyone else’s!”

—you were the one important thing to the person who brought the water beast back, he never wanted to be brought back. So this is his pay back.

Childe is shaking heavily, he’s frozen in place. He’s watching wide eyed as he watches the sea monster Slaughter you in the most painful—brutal way. He Watches as blood stains the ocean. He watches as the sea monster disappears in to the vast ocean.

All he can feel is the rain stabbing him as it falls. There’s a dull look in his eye as he stares at the ground—tears refusing to spill, guessing that he’s cried too much to cry anymore.

“I guess the rain isn’t perfect for bloodshed after all..”

repost

6:30 am 9/6/2022

[vermillionmars]

COMMUNITY GARDENS — !!

senpai (fnf) x gn reader

cw/tw ; vaguely gendered reader (no pronouns used tho), delinquent reader, lighthearted threats of violence, profanity, songfic

a/n ; if u think you’ve seen this b4,, u probs have !! i posted this to my shared acc with a friend but that’s since been deleted lol so i’m reposting on my personal acc

“ — HOW TO PLANT THEIR HEARTS IN COMMUNITY GARDENS ! ”

❝ Full disclosure, I am a monster, a creature of despair. Not that that should be a cause for concern. ❞

In most people's opinion, you were scum of the Earth.

Okay, that was harsh—it was less severe, but hyperbole just always seemed to get the point across better!

You were a delinquent, a rule-breaking, class-skipping, morally-questionable 'criminal.' (Truthfully, the only 'crime' you'd ever committed was simply skipping classes a few times, but gossip and rumors didn't care for facts.)

And your opposite? The school's golden boy, Senpai, naturally! Charming, rule-abiding, sweet ol' Senpai—the day to your night! Yang to your yin!

In the school's opinion, he was perfect!

...and in your opinion he was a lying little snake.

You just knew something was up with him. Not in a paranormal or a criminal sense, just that he hiding his true colors. You'd seen the subtle glares he'd give someone, before he quickly worked his expression into a charismatic smile. You'd seen the ever-so-slight movements of brows when they twitched in irritation. You'd seen the random clenching of his fists.

You weren't necessarily claiming that he was secretly some evil criminal or anything. You were just claiming he wasn't entirely the facade he put up.

You weren't either, not really. It was easier to get through school if you pretended to be a tough, uncaring asshole—you Werner entirely making up your personality, but you were slightly more genuine than Senpai ever could be. And plus, you did it to get people to avoid you—Senpai, on the other hand, did it to attract others to him. And it clearly worked, as they swarmed to him like moths to a flame.

❝ If there's one thing I've learned in all my years here, it's that despair is less abundant in those who understand how to plant their hearts in community gardens. ❞

To love everyone is not the same as to be loved by everyone. You understood that well, as did most of the Earth's general population. But...did Senpai? He didn't seem to follow that notion, because he tried to please everyone, convincing them with his manipulative little smiles that he truly cared about them, despite not knowing them at all. He loved them, he swore!

Maybe in some twisted view of his, he believed he could lie his way into being loved by everyone. Maybe that was why he appeared to hate your guts.

Yeah, another reason you were sure Senpai was at least partially lying about his personality was that he essentially sneered at you whenever you made eye contact. It confused you, because you couldn't recall ever doing anything to upset the man. Was simply not caring for him a crime worthy of his scorn, in his eyes?

His voice was always lower, gruffer, when he spoke to you. Like he was trying in vain to control his anger.

You didn't really want him to actually like you or anything, but it still kinda pissed you off he was rude for no reason (that you knew of).

"Oi, Senpai."

He turned at the mention of his name, grinning as usual, until he recognized it was you that called him.

"What's your deal, man?"

"My...deal?" He faked this annoying look of befuddlement, feigning his innocence as he always seemed to do. "Whatever do you mean?"

"You know what I'm talking about," you spat. Though it wasn't your intention to be snide with him, he just...made it so hard not to be. "What's your problem? With me?"

He blinked, and for a second, the shock on his face actually looked genuine.

❝ You'll be fine, you honeycomb. Who could ever hurt you, who could be so cold? You'll be fine, oh, honey pie. Who could ever hurt you, who could be so unkind? ❞

"I don't have any problems with you, [Y/N]." The chipperness of his voice was awkward, shaky. You know, like a liar.

"What's with the quiver in your voice, then?" When he gave no response, you clicked your tongue. "People like you piss me off. Actually, it'd be more accurate to say that you piss me off."

"O-oh? How so?"

"Just tell me the truth, for fuck's sake."

"I am." He insisted. You rubbed your forehead, he really knew how to give someone a headache..

"Yeah, okay—sure." You waved him off, turning back to go to your next class.

"H-hey!" He grabbed your wrist before you could walk away.

"What?"

"I, uh..." He scratched his cheek, bashfully averting eye contact. "I think you're..."

"I'm...?"

He muffled a frustrated groan, and shook his head. "Nothing! Um...see you after class...?" His voice trailed off, looking at you for either confirmation or denial.

"Yeah, sure. Bye." He smiled sweetly, and when you turned to leave for good this time, you got the feeling he had already reverted back to his popular, perfect guy persona.

You still couldn't stand him.

❝ The culmination of man's mistakes, came the day the sun ran so hot, it turned the desert to glass. ❞

"Nothing! Um...see you after class...?"

"Yeah, sure. Bye."

You had said that, but you never intended him to actually meet up with you. He seemed far too happy to be talking with you (you wondered where the nervousness he had shown around you previously went), someone who clearly didn't like him.

"[Y/N]!"

"Senpai..." There was far less enthusiasm in your tone than there was in his.

"We have lunch next." He stated, as if you didn't know the schedule you'd had for over seven months already.

"I know that." You said nothing else, but Senpai kept looking at you like he expected you to speak again. When you didn't, he decided to take the initiative.

"Would you...like to sit together?" Were those...puppy-dog eyes?

"Not...particularly, no." He deflated. You didn't want to sit with him, though, and that was the truth. Not only was he annoying, but his fangirls would likely beat you up for even being in his presence (not like that was something you could really control). But...you did feel a little bit bad.

"Fine, that works, I guess. Just sit two seats away from me."

"Of course, of course! Thank you!"

Lunch went fairly well. You were pleasantly surprised to learn that Senpai was capable of having pleasant conversations that didn't revolve around himself (in fact, he barely talked about himself...it was mainly just about you). Maybe you shouldn't have been that shocked, but you had always pegged him as a raging narcissist.

"That was fun, [Y/N]. We should eat together again tomorrow—!" He stopped himself before he could fully finish the sentence, but you knew what he was saying.

"I guess that works. Just don't be a bother."

"I won't, promise!"

So, like that, you built up some sort of rapport with the blond. You sat with him in lunch, and in the few classes you shared together, you shared fleeting glances towards another, as if to say 'hey, I acknowledge your existence!' It was honestly sort of fun, not that you'd ever tell Senpai that. He didn't need an ever bigger ego.

❝ If there's something to be learned from all these losers, it's that the price that you pay for arrogance and a false sense of immunity, is to face the wrath of a dying star. ❞

There was a small, teal-haired boy in a backwards hat and a pretty, red-headed girl in the school courtyard.

They looked so odd, so out of place. Partly because they wore no school uniform whatsoever, and partly because they were so short. Oh, and because the girl was sitting on a stereo.

Next to them was Senpai, but you expected him to be there—you followed him, after all.

What was he doing out here...? And, uh, why were they holding microphones?

"What in the actual—" Senpai had been saying something, but you accidentally cut him off.

"O-oh, [Y/N]! What are you doing here...?"

You crosses your arms. "You caused quote the stir in class. I mean, look behind you—I'm pretty sure at least half the female population is here."

He turned around. "Oh."

"So, what the hell is this all about?"

"Uh—" the blue-haided boy answered for him.

"Beep boo bop skee!" You had no clue what he just said, so you looked to Senpai in hopes of him translating.

"Rap—rap battle..." He said, almost in an embarrassed tone.

"Beee! Bep bo skidoo?" You still didn't know what he asked, but judging by Senpai's response, you determined it was a question about you.

"A...friend—"

"Bee!" He didn't really seem satisfied with the answer, but the tiny man accepted it nonetheless. "Bee boo bop?" He pointed to his microphone, and Senpai readjusted himself, twirling his pink microphone. (You noted that it matched his tie...cute).

You listened as the two battled in the form of a song, and you hated that you could instantly tell they were singing Senpai's first song, appropriately named 'Senpai.'

You expected that the shorter male would do well, but you didn't expect Senpai to actually lose.

❝ You'll be fine, you honeycomb. Who could ever hurt you, who could be so cold? You'll be fine, oh, honey pie. Who could ever hurt you, who could be so unkind? ❞

His face blue, he gripped his microphone tight. "Not bad for an ugly worm—but this time, I'll—"

No, no, no—you tuned him out. You couldn't listen. You had just began to think of him as...not an asshole, not rude, not gross—you couldn't have that image of him be shattered right when it had just been built.

You called him pleasant (mentally) only for a few days ago, and now he was throwing insults just because he lost a stupid rap battle?

You didn't focus on the song after that, but if you had, you would've noticed the slight glances Senpai gave you.

You likely would've returned those looks, but with a much angrier expression.

Senpai lost again, that was all you gathered from the screeching fangirls. You still weren't paying attention to him. Instead, you directed your attention to your hand, idly drawing lines into your palm out of boredom.

Couldn't this end already?

Well, after a loud, angered yell from your...friend(?), it did. He dropped the microphone, and the auburn-haired girl stopped bopping to the beat.

"Beep! Bo bep bi?" The tiny guy was rather happy, clearly not understanding Senpai's rage. You interpreted his series of beeps to mean 'do you want a rematch?' or something along those lines.

Senpai, however, looked like he was about to snap. So, although hesitant to touch him, you grabbed his arm and pulled him away, apologizing to the victor.

"And just when I thought you weren't that bad..." He was too enraged, too caught up in his own state of mind to recognize what you'd mumbled, but you preferred it that way. It was much more satisfying of a feeling to ignore him without him ever having a reason as to why.

❝ The years have been hard on this lonely heart. If you wanna know the truth, there's no more community gardens. So I guess I'll have to settle for you. ❞

You were ignoring him.

He could tell. He didn't understand, nor did he like it. Why? You had just become friends, hadn't you? Was it that ugly worm's fault? Did he win you over through kicking his ass beating Senpai in a rap battle? No, that couldn't be—the little guy had a girlfriend, anyways!

Then, were you disappointed in him for losing? That...seemed most likely. What else could he have possibly done?

But no matter the reason, it didn't change the fact that you refused to go anywhere near him. He couldn't speak to you, couldn't ask what he had done to upset you. It was hell.

But he wasn't angry at you, no, he was of course angry at the boy who beat him at his own songs. (Boyfriend...what a stupid name—he thought, ignoring the fact that his own name wasn't any better.)

So he devised a plan.

He'd simply serenade you! It was so simple, he wondered how he hadn't thought of it before! He never got the chance to show you his finalized version of 'Thorns,' after all, and what better time to do it than now?

He asked everyone in the school to fill every table and sit one sit apart at lunch as best they could today, so that way you had two options: sit with one of the people you hate, or go outside and eat. He was betting on you going outside, where he'd sing his heart out to you.

And sure enough, that's what you did. With nowhere else to go, you sat on a bench by this lovely sakura tree, eating your bento box in peace. At least, it was peaceful, before a sudden melody invaded your ears.

You knew instantly who it was, but you felt compelled to listen as he sung his newest track. Even though you were still upset, you couldn't bring yourself to run away.

"So?" He prompted as he finished his final note. You sighed.

"It was...lovely."

"Oh, great!" He clapped his hands. "So you'll stop avoiding me, then?"

"No."

"W-w—"

"You're an ass, Senpai. You resort to insults when you lose a fucking rap battle—can you not be a sore loser for one day?"

He paused, thinking. "Oh, so that's what this is about..." He sat down next to you. You didn't move. "I apologize, it's just rather hard to keep my emotions in check sometimes." He coughed.

"Tch, and isn't that because you fake, like, half of your personality?"

"It's not fake, my dear! Merely...exaggerated."

"Don't call me that." He smirked.

"Call you what, my dear?"

"I will actually stab you—"

"And weren't you just talking about me and my anger issues?"

He was right, and you hated that.

"Fine, I'll stop ignoring you." He cheered in victory. "But, answer me this first."

"Yes?"

"Do you...remember what you started to say a long while ago? That I'm...?"

"Oh!" He giggled, grasping your hands in his. "I think you're cute, is what I was trying to say."

[wizkiddx]

work with me

this is for @worldoftom 'lolbrosgetsicktoo' challenge event thing - go check it out bcos lots of much better writers have got involved too✨! I'm v new to these things but I tried :) the prompt was: 'would you quit whining and just get in the bath' . (also look at me acc posting sort of regularly, who'd of thought?!?!)

warnings: sickness / fever (more dramatic than it needs to be) / LOTS of medical inaccuracies

summary: when tom doesn't take advice and ends up very ill, very far from home, there's one person whose stuck dealing with it

“Please Tom… I need you to work with me!”

It wasn’t his fault he was being a complete nightmare, though your patience was wearing off somewhat.

For context, you were in Morocco, where he had been filming part of his next film, which only made trying to take care of him that bit harder.

Everyone got ill sometimes. It wasn’t his fault.

That was the mantra ringing through your head, even if you had a more challenging time believing it. Tom wasn’t stupid, as much as he liked to joke about it. HOWEVER, what he was less good at was heeding warnings. He was a white boy in Morrocco; the health and safety briefing had literally been aimed at him. Had he taken the advice not to eat any dodgy looking meats at the market?

Of course not; that’d be boring.

Everyone else was fine. You’d all sampled Morroccos culture without giving yourselves the worst case of food poisoning you’d ever witnessed. But not Tom - possibly one of the only ‘indispensable’ people on the set. If you, or one of the minor characters, or even the director, had got ill - the show could continue.

When you’d been rudely awoken by your phone going off, you’d known instantly. It was as if you’d told him not to take a bite out of the weird burger once you were away from the eager view of the street vendor. Sure enough, with bleary eyes, you hissed at the brightness of the phone screen before seeing ‘Tom H’ on the screen.

“Y/n?” His voice was croaky, but just from the single call of your name, it was clear he was feeling sorry for himself.

“Are you okay? It’s late T.”

“Um I… can you come over? You…you might need the key I’m - um- in the bathroom.”

As his stylist, it technically wasn’t part of your job description to also be mother when he was sick, but (unfortunately for you) after the 3 years working side by side with him - you were also friends.

Which you were almost regretting by the second time rinsing the toilet bowl clean after he’d evacuated what seemed to be the majority of his vital organs into it. Honestly, it was impressive how he managed to keep going.

That had been at around 4 in the morning- the doctor had been called at 8, coinciding beautifully with his 5th toilet extravaganza. Once the doctor had confirmed your original, if completely unqualified, diagnosis of food poisoning - you hadn’t been able to bite your tongue. Perhaps an ‘i told you so’ might’ve slipped past your lips, but Tom was a bit too out of it to argue back.

You’d been given firm advice from the doctor - he said little sips of water, rest and control his temperature. It all had seen pretty simple - though the action? Not so much.

It wasn’t his fault, yet Tom was not super compliant. You and Harry had both been taking turns in practically forcing him to take sips of water, having to turn off ‘modern family’ till he did. The blackmail had put you both in his bad book.

Honestly, thank the lord Harry was here too. You’d woken him up at seven, begging for help and since then, you’d tagged teamed. While one was looking after Tom, the other was phoning the director, the doctor, and the crew to inform them of the current situation.

Again, of all people. Why’d it have to be Tom?

Mainly because you knew how mortifying he found this. He didn’t like people fussing over him, never had. He liked to work hard, liked to make people happy - definitely didn’t like to feel a burden. Perhaps what made him feel ten times worse was that he knew he was inconveniencing the whole production team massively.

And yes, as you’d unhelpfully reminded him, it was ‘his fault’.

The lavish hotel room, big bathroom and pretty efficient AC still didn’t manage to mask the pungent in-the-back-of-your-throat smell from the bathroom. At the doctor’s advice, who had been a little concerned at Toms fever, Harry had cranked the AC on high. It had forced you to steal one of Tom’s big hoodies and a pair of joggers- you hadn’t left his room since he first called you, still wearing your tiny pyjama shorts and an old tee.

“Please turn the air con off.” His little voice whined from where he was lying, huddled up under the covers. Perched on the other side of the double bed, but over the covers with your laptop on his lap, you could actually feel him shivering with the chills. It felt like you were torturing the poor boy.

“T you know I can’t. It’ll make your fever worse.” The way he looked up at you, like a little Labrador that you were refusing to pet, actually pained your heart.

Okay, so yes it was his fault, but you weren’t mad, you just felt so awful for him.

“Please I’ll- I’ll pay you more.” His voice was hoarse; though he denied a sore throat, it sounded like the constant sickness was burning his windpipe.

“Tommm” you pouted, sticking your bottom lip out “I don’t want your money, want you to get better.”

Apparently giving up, brown eyes shot you the filthiest look in disappointment, rolling to face away from you. You thought he was giving you the silent treatment in a huff, but instead, he was praying on the weaker one.

“Harry, I’ll buy you that set of golf clubs-“

“NO!” You had to interrupt before Harry would say yes - because from the way his younger brother shot up from the arm chair, he was about to. Scowling eyes slowly focused back on you in annoyance, making you huff - shutting the laptop and kneeling on the bed to face him. After pressing the back of your palm to his forehead, which was scorching hot, you sighed. “I know you feel shitty and I’m so so sorry but I’m trying to make you better. So shut up, drink this and go to sleep!”

Like a child scorned, you received another death glare however, then he complied, taking a sip of the water you offered before lying back - huddling even tighter.

And it had been relatively peaceful for a few hours; Tom seemed to be getting some sleep - even if he was tossing and turning. Eventually, a prescription that the doctor had requested worked its way through the system, Harry getting a text to say he could go pick it up. The nearest pharmacy was probably a 30 minute drive from the hotel, so he left as soon as.

This left you alone with Tom, where the situation only descended into more chaos.

Almost as soon as Harry had left, Tom had stirred with a grunt. All it took was one look at his face for you to know. Both of you leapt up and flew into the toilet, Tom once again getting very familiar with the Moroccan toilet bowl.

This time though, when he had leant backwards, he’d sort of lost control and flopped most the way - you catching him before he could hit his head on the tiled floor.

“Woah, easy there!” It wasn’t like he’d passed out, but the look in his eye as he slumped into your lap… he wasn’t all there either. “Hey Tom… you with me? Tom?”

Lazily he blinked up at you, not really replying except for groans of half-formed words.

Deciding this had all got a bit direr, you almost sprinted back into the room, grabbing your phone and returning. He was still on the floor, his thumb and first finger pressing into each eye - groaning again.

“Hey Tom? I’m gonna call the doctor you need anything?” He whined in response, stopping only when you stroked his sweaty hair back, most of your attention on dialling the correct number.

The solution he’d given wasn’t pretty: Tom’s fever was too high hence why he was all woozy and groany. Until the doctor could get over with the stronger medications, you needed to lower his temperature in other ways or take him to hospital. He’d absolutely hate hospital, but the other choice? Boy, was he not going to like it either.

Ignoring Tom’s croaked question of what you were doing, you busied yourself switching on the bath taps. You let the water run until it was the right (very mild) temperate, then turned back to Tom, who’d managed to work himself up to sit against the sink unit.

“The doctor says you need it.” His brain was foggy, his mind was slow but your tone told him enough to know something was wrong with the bath. “Just take your clothes off and then I’ll help you-“

“Absolutely fucking not.” Good. He was still with it enough to argue.

“I am just as uncomfortable as you are Tom, but we both know you can’t stand up without fainting, so you are going to need my help.”

“Y/n!”

“Keep your boxers on and it’s just like a fitting! I’ve seen you have those before!”

It was clear as day just how emasculated he felt, especially because he knew you were right. Sitting up at this current moment was a push; there was no way he was getting in the bath without some help. Defeatedly he nodded, but gave you a piercing look to turn around before he started wiggling himself out of the flannel pyjama trousers and light cotton t-shirt. Most confusingly, he still felt freezing cold, yet he had long since learned not to argue with you - especially when your justification came from the advice of a doctor.

Your cue to turn around came in the form of an extra angry-sounding grunt- the look you got when you did wasn’t much better either. It was a weird contrast, though, having someone who physically appeared so indestructible (a superhero for crying out loud); to have been absolutely beaten to a pulp by a few mouth fulls of weird meat. You had seen his bare torso before, although it still wasn’t something easy to get used to - making you clench your teeth together just slightly. A very welcome view.

Perhaps you looked just a little too long at the man who was technically your boss, hunched angrily on the floor in nothing but his calvins - another grunt shaking you out of it. By now, the bath was almost full and you hurried to shut off the water, feeling your cheeks heat up as you cursed silently to yourself.

“Okay come on, gimme your arm.” Begrudgingly Tom followed your request, slinging his arm heavily over your shoulder as you crouched beside him. As strong as he looked, you knew right now he felt powerlessly weak - all that muscle was just going to be almost dead weight.

Now it was your turn to grunt and groan as you pulled Tom up to stand, him focusing on blinking away the headrush he got.

“Come on T work with me here.” Getting him to the side of the bath wasn’t too difficult, the issue came when he stepped with one foot into the bath and yelped, instantly withdrawing as if it was a literal ice bath.

The sudden movement had you both losing balance, ending with Tom sitting on the edge of the bath and you leaning over him, in between his legs, and slapping your hand on the wall opposite purely so you both didn’t end up in the bath.

“Tom!”

“It’s like ice water!”

“Its lukewarm like the doctor said!”

“It is not its from the fucking arctic!”

“Oh for god sake!” Exasperated, you paced up and down the bathroom shaking your head at his ridiculousness. This was ALL. HIS. FAULT.

You came back to him with an ultimatum.

“It’s this or the doctor said I had to drag your ass to hospital.”

“Nooooooo.” The 25 year old seemed to convert into a whiny three year old again.

“Those are the two options. So will you PLEASE quit complaining and get in the bath.”

Keeping up the toddler persona, Tom huffed but reluctantly nodded in agreement - you had come up trumps. It didn’t stop him yelping when you helped to lower him in. His breath was shaky, as a response to the ‘cold’, but he was firming it. At least when you felt his forehead after a couple of minutes, it certainly seemed as though the fever was starting to ease off .

“You can go if you want.” His voice was murmured and as you looked up at him, he did his very best to avoid your gaze.

“Not a chance, if you drown on my watch, Nikki will never forgive me.” At the very least he seemed to appreciate your joke, scoffing a little with a small nod. “If you don’t want me here I get it. As soon as Harry’s back, I’ll swap with him.”

“No! It’s not that its… I’m just an ass when I’m ill.”

“A self aware ass, though.” Again he chuckled a little, as you folded your arms on the edge of the porcelain tub, resting your head lying to one side. “You had me pretty scared there for a moment, you know?”

He nodded a little, creating a wave of ripples in the water which you watched to avoid his gaze - which you knew was tracing all your features inquisitively.

“Hey it’s in the job description, always a bit dramatic... I’m sorry though I should never of called you- don’t know why I didn’t just get Harry.” In response you tutted, taking a moment to lean up and push his sweaty curls back a bit.

Just because you could, it was allowed in this moment.

“’m glad you did.”

“Yeh me too” He sighed, eyes fluttering shut in the easy silence of the bathroom. You kept a vigilant eye on him for the next 20 minutes, checking the temperature of his forehead using the back of your hand, whilst he seemed to finally get a bit of proper restbite, appearing like the worst had passed. You had no idea what was taking Harry so long; in fact it was the doctor that arrived first- who you ran to let in (not wanting to leave Tom asleep in the bath one bit).

Whilst the doctor did all his checks, taking his temperature properly this time, satisfied that it was much more manageable. He still wanted to set him up with some oral rehydration rescue packs to get his hydration status a bit better and give some anti-sickness tablets and antipyretics.

Having actually been getting some rest before all the prodding and poking, Tom was back to being a grumbling dick - now not wanting to leave the bath (the irony was real - making you roll your eyes). Once again, he appeared embarrassed to have you see him like this, so you left the doctor to help him get out and changed- instead going down to reception to get a fresh set of sheets, as he’d done a pretty impressive job of sweating through the old ones.

Even if tired and grumpy, when Tom exited the bathroom, he looked much better - he was walking himself without the doctor’s help. Which honestly was such a relief because when he had passed out on you, you genuinely were terrified. Thankfully the doctor stayed for the next 20 or so minutes, which was just when Harry returned with a bag of medications - which were now wholly redundant, given the doctor had already supplied everything.

“What happened?” Harry asked you in a hushed voice, whilst Tom was distracted with getting his medications. Recounting the story of Tom pretty much passing out, Harry grimaced for you, then launching over to give you a tight hug.

“Are you okay?” That was a novel idea, you hadn’t really thought about yourself at all - but honestly, you were a bit shaken, having been running on adrenalin for most of the night.

“I-uhm… yeh I think so… just-just was a bit scared, I guess? Felt bad too because he didn’t want me there but-“

“I can promise you Y/n, he did want you there. Just probably embarrassed he wasn’t all manly and that…” With a nod, you smiled softly at the frizzy-haired boy.

Whilst working with Tom, it also meant getting pretty close to his younger brother. The two Hollands were almost attached at the hip, which you were very much okay with.

It was weird though... your relationships were completely different. Harry was just your brother, through and through. He wound you up like a sibling but also knew you as if he had your whole life. With Tom… it wasn’t that. Arguably, you were closer to Tom, but on a different level. It was more exciting, more nerve-wracking and heartwarming all at the same time. Honestly, you couldn’t get your head around it properly.

“Hey, you’re probably shattered. Why don’t you go back to your room and get some sleep? I got it in here.” You knew Hary was trying to offer something nice, and now all the excitement had worn off, you were unbelievably shattered. But you didn’t like the idea of not being there, as a just in case.

“Uhm, I think I might just stay, you know?” And he did, with a deliberate, knowing smile, he nodded.

He knew you were worried. He knew Tom had really really scared you. He also knew how much you cared about his brother.

Just like how Harry knew Tom wanted you there, even if he felt embarrassed. Well, anyone would- when you are passing out half-naked in front of the one person that really matters.

It was just at this point that the doctor was done, giving Harry instructions about the rest of the day, when you made a beeline for the bed. Tom was propped up against the headboard, still with a pale sullen look and tired eyes, but a bit less clammy and more human. He cracked a smile as you crawled up onto the other side of the bed, kneeling next to him.

“How’re you doin’?”

“All drugged up, just feel fucking exhausted.” Instinctively you reached up to feel his forehead, really appreciating the fact it felt almost normal.

“Join the club mate, I had a 5am wake up call too.” You almost whispered, intending to make Tom laugh, but instead only getting a pout.

“I am sorry, a-are you going to go back to your room?”

“Nah” Tom’s eyes didn’t light up, except the fact that they very much did. “Can’t trust you not to get into trouble while I’m gone Holland.”

“Thanks.” He laughed weakly before shimmying down on the bed, so he was much more comfortable. “And thankyou, I-I’m sorry I’m a dickhead and made your life-“

“Shut up Tom!” Laughing, you lightly slapped his arm, also leaning down on the bed, so you were lying facing him. “You’re all feverish; go to sleep before you say something stupid.”

There was a long pause, Tom just gazing deep into your eyes, because he was pretty sure what he was thinking was nothing to do with the dodgy unidentified meat he’d had the evening before.

“What... like asking you out?”

…..

“Maybe that wouldn’t be so stupid.”

~~~~im really not sure how I feel about this one, let me know what you thought ;) ~~~~

tagging: @lovehollandy12 @hallecarey1 @crossyourpeter@hollandfanficlove

[59writes]

SEVENTEEN- REACTION: THEIR S/O GETS INJURED (PART 2)

(PART ONE)

part two of @honeyylin ‘s request!!! sorry it took so long honey ㅠㅠ

also check out honey’s acc!!! they’ve recently started writing fic so give em a visit!! <3

today’s photo theme is green green green green green green green green green green

(I didn’t proofread this I will when it’s not 5 am lol)

tw: food, injury

SEOKMIN

• *insert terrified screaming*

• yikes. this man. this poor fellow.

• he’s so worried about you!!!

• like. you’re fine. it’s not a big deal you just won’t be able to walk without crutches for a while

• but this man PHYSICALLY refuses to go to work

• Jihoon even comes to your apartment to beat Seokmin’s ass gently request he come to work cuz they kind of need him

• but no, because “y/n needs me more!!”

• please you’re fine. you can walk and you work from home already. you’ll live. You’ve been injured before.

• this goes in one ear and out the other!

• he will stay home and baby you and peek in your room every ten minutes like “hey are you ok???? do you need anything???”

• it’s kind of endearing

• the calls you keep getting from Seungcheol and Jihoon are not though because SOMEONE keeps forgetting to “call in sick” to work!!

• it’s just part of the whole shebang. he calms down eventually and gets over the anxiety of you getting even more hurt or struggling and goes back to the others

• but you bet your ass when he comes home at night you’re not going anywhere and he’s gonna baby you until he deems you all better

• also he definitely just likes babying you because he doesn’t declare you better until a week after the doctor does, “just to be safe!!!”

• he loves you very much and if anything we’re to happen to the love of his life he’d like. Evaporate on the spot

• 10/10 man right here

MINGYU

• ok so we know how clumsy this man is

• he technically knows how to take care of injuries

• also the injury was sort of maybe his fault ):

• he tripped over a damn rock and made you stumble too, falling and scraping up your leg

• and this poor man is apologizing faster than he raps

• you’re not badly hurt, and when the pain wears off you’re laughing

• and Mingyu’s all pouty lol

• and though you assure him that you’re ok and everyone trips up sometimes, he just wants to make it up to you

• he is also one of the other mfs who would make soup. him and Josh r gonna open a soup kitchen s2g

• but he’s also super cheesy and you wake up from a nap and see that Mingyu’s gone out and gotten flowers and made some nice food and made a little mini date in ur apartment

• and he just feels so bad !!!! please help this man

• once you joke that maybe you should get injured more often so you guys have more dates like this he finally really calms down

• but like I said, he’d know how to treat any injury

• maybe not well, and I’m sure this man’s instinctive response is “I will put a bandaid on it and move on with my life” but how focused he is when he is just wiping off dirt from your arm or leg or whatever and making you sit still while he gauzes it up is just really sweet he cares so much

MINGHAO

• this man does not know anything.

• I mean don’t get me wrong he’s incredibly smart and emotionally intelligent but also. there’s nothing in this man’s brain except for dastardly ideas

• and you nearly breaking your arm is not exactly a dastardly idea

• so he kinda just shuts down

• he wants to help !!! So bad !!!! but he can’t do anything !!!

• like he’s genuinely such a kind dude and always willing to help even if he teases about it and just always there

• and this is the one thing he can’t help with!!!

• so frustrated ):

• so he spends his time with you by lurking with a pout, ready for any request you had

• he definitely looks like a lost puppy ㅠㅠ

• maybe you act a little more helpless than usual so he can feel better about himself. just maybe

• seeing him brighten when you ask him to get the pasta from the top shelf or help with the laundry is completely worth getting hurt for!!

• eventually he cheers up and goes back to his normal and teasing ways

• and once you heal up he’s so glad he can hug you super tight again (:<

SEUNGKWAN

• Ah, Seungkwan.

• be prepared for lots of passive-aggressive scolding

• I mean when it first happens you can see the panic in this poor man’s eyes

• ok well technically you texted him about it but his reply was violently misspelled and he showed up at your house within 15 minutes

• tbh you should be scolding him because he definitely was speeding to get home that fast

• but he was scolding you!!!

• like wtf you’re already feeling shitty and then Seungkwan comes over and is acting like your mom

• but this man is emotionally mature!!!

• he notices how frustrated and snippy your replies get and calms down, hugging you tightly where you sit on the bathroom counter as he cleans you up

• complains about getting blood on his shirt tho the bastard

• but he definitely hangs out with you for the rest of the day and you catch up and eat ice cream while you lie around on the floor and it’s just. aju nice. (lol)

• he does his best to keep your mind off of any pain or struggling, and we all know this man is a master of distraction so it goes very well

• he’s a very home-y person and you always feel safe with him (:

VERNON

• his literal response is “well that’s not good”

• you fuckin call him like “hey sol I’m in urgent care kinda like. broke my arm” and he’s just like “Yeah that’s a problem”

• thank you Hansol “Sherlock” Chwe

• he is just. out of his element please this man will just stare at your cast or whatever with wide eyes like “yo you broke your arm” yes Vernon

• he’s kinda just fascinated ngl

• he lets you tell your story with wide eyes, beaming proudly when you said you didn’t cry

• he’s like “yeah that’s my partner (:< so cool and badass”

• he’s just very silly about it and doesn’t treat you any differently

• which is nice because you kinda hate people bringing attention to it cuz it’s annoying as shit already ):<

• and he’s already so helpful and willing to do chores or whatever so you don’t have to worry about carrying things or washing dishes or whatever cuz Vernon’s got it!!!

• plus it’s adorable how literally every night he’s just like “it’s so cool how you have a cast” like it’s the dumbest thing ever but he finds it so entertaining. like not even the fact you got hurt just like “holy shit like. it’s cement they basically cement your arm in place you have cement on your arm y/n you could knock someone out with that”

• he’s a cutie lol

CHAN

• ok contrary to popular belief I think he would handle it very well!!

• don’t get me wrong this man is PANICKING under the surface but like. he’s so calm about it on the outside??? hello????

• you call him during practice like “hey so I kinda got hurt I’m ok tho, at the doctor rn” and he’s just like “yes ok are you ok?!”

• little dude lol

• and even though you are, in fact, completely fine, he’s gotta worry smh it’s his job!!

• he comes home and listens to the story as he helps you change the bandages with the most gentle hands ))))):

• and being near you definitely helps calm him down

• he’s back to teasing and being goofy in no time

• this man also definitely knows some medical shit idk what makes me think that but he knows how to like. deal with an injury.

• he definitely is very medically aware idk man I feel like he listens to doctor speak cuz it’s cool and is like “oh yeah go ice that you don’t want it cramping up” whenever one of the other guys complains about something minor lol

• he’s very caring ): I love he sm (:

• he can be a little rat but he knows when to stop and be an ally and what an excellent ally he is!!!!!!!!!

I’m so sorry I’ve never done an after note like this before but seeing all the green and plants makes me think of this damn tweet and I can’t stop laughinh

“he has pollen allergy” I’m sobbing please

[0risha]

hi! this is my first time interacting but I love your acc and congrats for 1000 followers! I’d like to ask for a matchup for your new event if that’s ok ofc <33

So my ideal date would be at the amusement park, I love thrill rides and just adrenaline in general (extreme sports/horror movies....)

My ideal type would be someone who’s REALLY funny, adventurous, smart, affectionate, who’d talk about the things I like with me and who tells me they’re proud of me, likes physical affection (lot of hugs), but who still is independent and gives me space when I need it / not too jealous and overprotective

Personality-wise im very sarcastic, flirty, confident, independent and tbh i don’t really care abt others opinions so I guess I can seem intimidating, Im a very logical person and thus have trouble handling others emotions and being empathetic but I’m a really good listener and am always here to give advices. I’m constantly daydreaming and I’m very anxious when I have to talk to people/ i can’t stay with ppl for more than like 2 days bc my social battery is very low💀, it takes me a lot of time before I’m feeling at ease with someone but once I am I will straight up bully them 24/7😭 I’m generally calm and I don’t talk a lot but I’m extremely passionate abt the things I like and i also love trying new things/ the thrill in general!

Im an INTP, cancer i kin jirou from mha and pieck from aot, I hate condescending persons, insects, too hot temperatures and routine, but I love music (especially classic rock/hard rock etc), psychedelic and experimental movies, everything that revolves around psychology, literature and sleeping !

I’d prefer to be matched with a male character from Tokyo revengers and I go by she/her <333

If you don’t answer it’s ok I don’t even know if this is the right way to send an ask *sigh*but have a nice day !!

THANK YOU FOR REQUESTING A MATCHUP PRODUCT !

ORISHA MATCHES YOU WITH ....

˚₊❏ chifuyu matsuno

"you don’t need to." there's a light blush dusted over his cheeks as he murmurs underneath his breath. his breath hitches as your fingers dance across his bare chest. you throw him a look as you press an ice pack to the already purple bruise.

"i do." you state matter of factly, throwing a useless piece of gauze in the trash bin. you wrap the remaining pieces across his knuckles, the sight of dotted blood makes your stomach turn. "you were all bruised and whatnot."

you frown, the memory of him shuffling through your front door with a bloody fist and a nearly broken rib causes your gaze to grow narrow.

"you almost died on my front step." you hear him snort but it ends with a pained hiss. despite that, he pulls you in slowly, mindful of his state.

"sorry for making you worry." his tone's laced with a genuine symphony. you shake your head in his hold, his words roll over you, infusing into your body, and for the first time since he showed up at your door, you relax.

you plant your cheek on an uninjured part of his chest and take his hand into your hold. pressing your lips to his wrapped knuckles, you kiss them one by one. the material's soft against your cheeks.

he lets out a relieved sigh; he's forgiven. your kisses are syrupy slow. you feel his soft gaze on you but don't bother to look up.

"it's fine. just be careful next time, matsuno."

"i will. i promise."

orisha's 1k event :: open

(matchups are closed)

[iwadori]

Hiiii can i request prompt 53 with tsukki? My annoying cousin u may know @chibiiichan(i cant tag her its a surprise) recommend ur account and well she never been right more than now I LIKE UR ACC TOO URM JUST TAG HER IN THE POST (bcs its actually her birthday next week monday so....the least i could do this bcs she likes tsukki and shes recently talk abt the iwazumi story of yours....lmao shes cringe but in the same time got mad n i was besides her hearing her whining like bruh 'its 1 am'...i know i should buy something for her but she got spoiled enough 💅...that mf-) thank you ✨

‘ALWAYS AND FOREVER’

TSUKISHIMA X READER

2K WORDS

GENRE: ANGST,FLUFF

TW: SLIGHT AMBIGIOUS MENTION OF SUICIDE/ASSISTED DEATH, AND DEATH, CURSING (IN MY A/N)

THIS IS FOR @chibiiichann Happy birthday, I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS (BECAUSE I HATE IT :D ) SOOOOO YEAH I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR BIRTHDAY.

NOT PROOFREAD AT ALL. EXPECT SLIGHT MISTAKES

You were dying. You knew it. Your husband, Kei, knew it. Even friends you haven’t spoken too since high school knew it.

So why did you all pretend that everything was okay?

5 year old Y/N:

You were running around your neighbourhood park chasing after butterflies, without a care in the world. As you were frollicing in the grass, you manage to trip over a rock tumbling to the ground scraping your knee making it bleed. Looking down at your slightly injured knee, your lip begins to quiver which eventually leads to wails of tears streaming down your face.

“you don’t have to cry you know?” said a slightly quiet voice towering over you. Above you was a boy, quite tall with a fat pair of glasses, golden eyes and a head full of blonde locks.

“Well when I get hurt, I cry” you say matter oh factly (is that the phrase?) rubbing your nose as you sniffle. He held out a hand to you, which you immediately took shooting upwards and brushing yourself off.  

The boy, after looking at you wildly, turns around and walks back to the actual park. “Oi wait,” you call at the boy swiftly following him “aren’t you going to ask my name?”

“no.” he says simply, proceeding to walk ahead.

“well my names Y/N L/N pleasure to meet you,” you say jumping in front of him so he doesn’t move, waiting for him to tell you his name...which he doesn’t. “you don’t have to be so rude you know”  

“I’m not being rude” he says stiffly “ it’s just my brother says not to speak to strangers” a smirk appears on his face to say ‘you can leave me alone now.’  

As if on cue, his brother approaches the both of you given the boy a slap on the back making him cringe “Hey Kei, who’s the friend you’ve made here?”  

“My name is Y/N L/N and I'm here to be KEI’s best friend!” you said putting the emphasis on the word Kei after just learning that was the blondes name.  

Kei rolled his eyes and sighed saying “nii-chan can we go home now” he folded his arms in annoyance.

“No Kei, you’ve got to get to know your new found friend Y/N-Chan right?” his brother said teasingly, knowing it was the last thing Kei wanted to do.

“Yes ofcourse!” you say with a toothy grin, dragging Kei along with you to his demise.

Until the sun went down, you spent the rest of your time with Kei getting to know eachother (well him getting to know you more, since you did all the speaking.) Regardless of his previous annoyance in getting to know you in the first place, Kei would be lying if he said he didn’t want to know you now.

As the sun was setting, Kei’s older brother (who’s name you learned was Akiteru) called him to tell him he had to go home because dinner was ready. Before he left, you grabbed his hand and wrapped your pinky finger around his saying “As long as we shall live, we will always look out for eachother as we are forever bestfriends, agreed?”

back to present -  

In some odd way, this was Kei’s way of looking out for you. He knew what you had was uncurable and would weaken you even more as the days go by, so pretending like nothing was wrong seemed to be best in his eyes.  

Everything you and Kei did was a game or some nostalgic act that you once did when you were children. It was sweet to say the least, seeing Kei all engrossed and determined to make you happy.  

Your alarm rings snapping you out of you daydream, ‘it was time for medicine’ you thought with your face scowling at the thought. Immediately on time, as always, Kei comes In the room with all your medicine thats needed.

“Aren’t you my perfect little nurse Kei” you say teasingly giving him a wink, laughing as you see his face turn red.

“Do you have to do this every time y/n?” he asks rolling his eyes at your childish behaviour.

“Oh I'm just showing love to my best and favourite nurse” you continue laughing at your own words

“Im your only ‘nurse’” he deadpans giving you your medicine as you talk.

“Well that is more reason to make you the best nurse.” you say smiling.

Silence falls between you, and you stare down at your arm watching as your husband gives you the medicine making you frown. “Do we have to keep doing this?” you ask which is probably the 1000th time you’ve asked.

“Of course we do Y/N as I’ve said yesterday and the day before that and the day before that it-”

“But do we really?” you interrupt “I can’t keep doing this. You can’t keep doing this.”

“Do you doubt me Y/N, I can do this forever” he says “ I can take care of you forever”

“But I don’t wan-”

“I’m finished, I’m going to start on dinner” he gets up and leaves the room yelling “I’ll call you when it’s done.”

Sometimes you and Kei have these conversations. And all the time it ends the same way. You complain, he ignores and then you go and have dinner.

You can understand why he doesn’t want to have this conversation. Who would want to hear about their partners complaints about practically being alive. Kei was torn, ever since he met you all he wanted to was to keep you happy. But could he compromise his own happiness for it.

15 year old Y/N - flashback

“Kei Kei, aren’t you excited!” you yell smiling widley

“Excited for what?” he asks, amused by your enthusiasm “it’s just highschool.”

“Well it’s a new highschool! Karasuno high school, to be exact.”

“And that is still just a school.” he says

“Not just any! That’s the school nii-chan went too, and even tho he lie-”

“Let’s not talk about it Y/N” he murmurs “we should go now, don’t want to be late on our first date.”

Going to Karasuno was fun, at the start everyone was pleasant and nice. But after a week or two when you and Kei were still stuck to eachother like glue, people weren’t so pleasant. Kei was like a pop idol, being gorgeous and over 6ft at just the age of 15, caused alot of attention, especially when he was always around you.

At the start, the hate you got was bearable, it was the petty bitchy notes in your locker or just people blatanly talking badly about you infront of you. People didn’t do it when you weren’t around Kei, so when he had volleyball practice (which you were so excited that he joined the team) you were a big target for the bullies to come around.

Kei didn’t really know of the bullying that happened towards you, especially since he was mainly in practice or not around when it happened. But one day in practice he heard some of his teammates, kageyama and hinata who seemed to talking about a student in one of their classes that was always getting picked on by the other girls in the year.

“Yeah and I heard that Nana-san was planning on getting her and her friends to attack Y/N-san soon.”  said Hinata

“Shrimpy, who are they planning on attacking?” Kei asks to make sure he just heard the ginger correctly.

“Oh this lovely person in our class their name is Y/N-san” he says, looking at Kei’s reaction he also asks “Why? Do you know them?”  

Kei doesn’t respond, and immediately leaves the gym, ignoring Hinata’s and the other members of the teams yells of ‘Where are you going tsukishima.’ He didn’t care, he just had to get to you.  

He searched all the classes, asking every student if he knew where you were. Someone directs him to the toilets, where he burst through the door to see the other girls in your year surrounding you and beating you up.  

“What the fuck are you doing to them?” he yells startling the girls.

“T-T-Tsukishima-san" one girl says “It’s not what it looks like.”

“Oh fuck off” he says, with them still frozen in shock “I said go!”  

“And don’t think I don’t know your names either” he calls after them.

He rushes towards your bruised body on the ground and cradles you gently, confused on what to really do. “Oi Kei,” you say weakly catching his attention “I would’ve won if you didn’t come to stop the fight.” you joke making him scoff.

“Whatever you say Y/N.”

After you heal up, Kei already told on the girls that beat you up getting them suspended, and you explain how they were treating you because of their infatuation of him. And how they only did it when he wasn’t around.

Once he learns this information, he decides to quite the volleyball team, to your surprise. But you demands on making him not quit were ignored, as he excused it by saying “I have to make sure you’re always alright remember, and if that means quitting some volleyball team then so be it.”

That was one out of the many times that Kei put his happiness before yours.

Flashback over.

When you first got diagnosed, Kei was immediately researching on it as it was a very rare condition. But sadly, he only found what the doctor already told you both. It was uncurable and your immune system and your body will weaken as the days go by.

Which it did, you were a shell of your past self. It was always shocking for Kei to see, especially with you only being 25. ‘It wasn’t supposed to be this way,’ but he never let you see his sadness.

Whenever you knew Kei was sad you always reminded him “Kei, I may be dying but please don’t cry over me” every time you said, there was a slight undertone of humour in your voice which always worked in boosting Kei’s spirit.

AN: IVE GOTTEN TO THE POINT WHERE I HATE THIS SOOO IM SORRY IN ADVANCE FOR THE SHITTING RUSHED ENDING IM GOING TO PROVIDE FOR YOU LOL.

The days passed and the years went by, and you and Kei were still alive and kicking it. Doing your daily routine of you making some joke, Kei giving you your medicine and then you eating dinner. You eventually stopped complaining, realizing and remembering your promise you gave to Kei at 5 years old in that park. “As long as we shall live, we will always look out for eachother as we are forever bestfriends, agreed?”

Of course you had your rough days, everybody did and it was even harder being sick with a terminal illness. But having Kei to guide you through the storm made It better for you.

However, Kei isnt a miracle worker. He couldn’t save you, noone could. And you both knew that. That didn’t mean it made it any easier when the medicine stopped working and your pain got too hard to bear. Kei couldn’t watch you do this anymore, “the choice is yours” he said with tears in his eyes.  

So you knew what you had to do, you got in your bed pulling Kei with you, and letting him envelope you in a big hug as you both cried.

“I love you,” you say “You know that right?”

“Of course I know that, idiot” he replies “And I love you.”

“Always and forever?”

“Always and forever.”

AN: how did I END UP CRYING WHILST WRITING THIS WHEN IT MADE NO FUCKING SENSE, I WAS TRYING TO DO THIS COOL NOTEBOOK (I HAVENT EVEN WATCHED THE NOTEBOOK) ENDING WHERE ITS AMBIGIOUS AND SHIT AND I JUST GIVE UP OKAY? I APOLOGISE LOOOOOOL. I HOPE YOU ENJOY ATLEAST A SENTENCE OF THIS AT LEAST.

[gukooky]

☕️ ardent

previous //part 22// next

☕️ ardent masterlist ☕️

“Okay, I’m worried now,” Jungkook greets you with a frown when you pull open the door. You shyly move out of the way and motion for him to come in. 

“Sorry about not answering you,” you mumble, closing the door behind him. Settling down on your couch, he grabs a pillow and hugs it on his lap. 

“S’okay,” Jungkook shrugs, letting out a sigh of relief. “To be honest, the worst thought came to mind.”

“Oh?” You raise a curious brow, taking a seat on the other end of the couch. Putting your foot up, you lean your cheek against your bent knee and ponder aloud, “Like what? I ran away with Jaehyun to France?”

“Pfft, more like he kidnapped you or something!”

“Oh, bubs,” you frown, resembling the pouty emoji. “Glad to know you worry, though.”

“Of course I do,” he says as if it were obvious, his face contorting into one showing confusion. The room went silent for a minute; it wasn’t an awkward silence, however, it was more of a comfortable silence. 

“Where are your roommates?” Jungkook broke the silence, looking around for your two friends. 

“Hoseok is visiting family and Taehyung got stuck at work.” 

“So you’ve been here alone?”

“For a few hours, that’s all,” you shrug. 

“If I knew you were alone I’d have come over sooner to help you confront Jaehyun if you needed me to!”

Half-smiling and half-pouting, you lean over and pinch Jungkook’s cheek lovingly. “You truly are a cutie patootie, aren’t you?”

“I guess I am,” Jungkook rolls his eyes and looks away to hide the smile growing on his face. But you noticed. 

“Aha! I saw that smile! You enjoy being called that now!”

“It grew on me, sue me!” Jungkook fires back, not bothering to hide the grin on his face this time. You scrunch your nose up, wondering if you were more amused when he didn’t like the nickname a few months back versus now, accepting it. “So what did you wanna talk about?” Jungkook reminds you of what you were worried about and you widen your eyes. 

“Uh, well…” you stammer, scratching behind your ear nervously.

“What?” Jungkook furrows his eyebrows at your odd expression. Never did you cower like you were doing now. 

“So, I spoke to Jaehyun, right?” You begin, trying to find a smooth way to change the subject.

“Uh huh, how was that, by the way? You haven’t told me anything,” Jungkook frowns, readjusting his position to be facing you. The two of you were both sitting on opposite ends of your couch, backs against the armrest. 

“Oh, right!” You completely forgot you haven’t spilled all the details about your conversation. “I basically told him it was unfair to just ask me to come back into my life after abruptly telling me…” You trail off, realizing WHY you didn’t tell Jungkook in the first place. 

“Telling you what?” Jungkook leans forward a bit, looking interested. 

“He uh…he told me he was still in love with me,” you stammer quietly, looking down. 

“He what!?” It was almost comical how Jungkook jolted upright, crying out like it was the most bizarre thing he’d ever heard. 

“Yup,” you confirm, blinking slowly. 

“And, what’d you say? Are you-no, you’d be with him right now if you-right?” Jungkook blurts. 

“I told him the truth. I just don’t love him anymore,” you answered, feeling heat rise up your neck. “And then he asks why. Why, of all questions! And I just tell him I’m in love with someone else.”

“I see, I see,” Jungkook grabs his chin and imagines your interaction before freezing. “You-you’re in love with someone?”

“Yeah, and it took a while to figure out, too. If anything, Jaehyun was part of the reason I realized I was in love with this person. My friends were convinced I’ve been crushing for weeks but I was too stubborn to admit it.”

“Hold on a minute. You’re in love love with someone?” Jungkook repeats carefully, still trying to wrap his head around it. 

“And how is in love love different from in love?” You tease, a smile growing on your face.

“W-Who!? You haven’t hung out with anybody the past few weeks but me and your roommates. Have you been keeping secrets from me-”

“Repeat what you just said,” you cut him off, waiting for him to understanding.

“You haven’t hung out with anyone but me and your roommates,” he spoke quietly to himself, focusing on the ground, wracking his brain. He looked up as if a light bulb went off before his face grew sour, “you’re in love with one of your roommates? Hate to tell you this, but don’t you know they’re-”

“Oh my god, you idiot,” you smack your forehead with your palm, shaking your head profusely. “It you, you dummy! I’m in love with you!”

“Oh,” Jungkook relaxes back on the couch, before sitting up again. “Wait, me!?” 

Sighing, you could only grin and nod. Seeing the realization spread across your face was probably one of the purest reactions you could’ve ever witnessed. His face was so lost at first, wondering who on earth you were talking to. Then from the once lost look, came the wary one, assuming it was either Taehyung or Hoseok you’d be in love with. And finally, probably the cutest expression of all, the tomato-faced, pursed lipped Jungkook who was trying to do everything in his power to not look embarrassed. It wasn’t every day he was confessed to by his high school crush, after all. 

“Um, Jungkook? Are you okay?” You ask with caution, waving your hand in his face. He’d been sitting frozen for seconds and it began to worry you. “I’m sorry if this ruins anything between us but I had to tell you because...well, I couldn’t keep it in.”

“You mean to tell me,” he begins slowly, “that when I said I was going to get you to eventually fall in love with me as a stupid freshman in high school, I was actually right!?”

You let out a sigh of relief, grinning, “Maybe freshman you isn’t as stupid as you originally thought.”

“I guess not,” he blows out a puff of air from his mouth, looking up to look at you in the eyes for the first time since you confessed. 

“Uh,” you rub the back of your neck, bashfully, “now’s usually the time when you reject me or accept my feelings so if you could-”

“Oh right!” He snaps his fingers, lips curling upward. “Y/N, do you even have to ask? I think it’s obvious I’m utterly and completely enamored by you. I’ve never been so close or allowed to be so close with a girl before. That’s part of why I was so awkward around you in the beginning. Sure, we were friends, but I never really had girl friends?”

“What was the other part?” You ask softly,

“That I liked you in high school,” Jungkook ruffles his hair, looking as shy as ever. “Every time I saw you walk into the cafe, I felt like the same guy who used to hide behind his locker door, trying to get a glimpse of you with your friends. And then you’d walk right up to me so I could take your order and half of the time, I’d just stare dumbfounded because it was still hard to believe I was seeing you face to face even after high school. Not that you noticed anyway…”

“Hey!” You frown, crossing your arms, “I’m horrible with faces so forgive me for not realizing it was you! Trust me, if I had better memory, I’d never forget a face like yours.”

“I don’t blame you. I wasn’t on your radar much in high school either and I don’t blame you for that. I never made an effort to know you. I was just hoping for that moment when you’d notice me.”

“I’m sorry it took a few years but hey, i’m here now,” you wince by the end of your statement, hoping that could make up for high school. 

Jungkook leans forward and puts your face between his hands, squeezing gently. “Now, who’s the cutie patootie?”

“Still you,” your voice was distorted from the way your cheeks were squished together. Jungkook smirks at you, finding your expression amusing. You stay still, eyes wide and eyebrows raised. Warmth spread within you when you noticed his grip loosen and his face was now only centimeters away. The gap between you was nearly nonexistent when-

RRRING!!

Jungkook pauses but decides to ignore it. Again when he tries leaning in again-

RRINGGG!!!

Jungkook groans, pulling away. He fishes for his phone in his pocket and annoyedly pressed the answer button. “Yes?” You watch his expressions in amusement. “I’m at Y/N’s. You’re kind of interrupting something...Not like that!...I hate you...I’ll be back later...Bye.”

“Who was it?” You ask when he ended the call. 

“Jimin,” Jungkook frowned, making a mental note to smack Jimin next time he saw him for ruining your moment. “Anyway…” Jungkook took advantage of your distraction and pulled your wrist so you were the one who leaned forward. You gulp, never expecting his boldness. Your lips barely brush against each other’s until a loud knock from the front door makes you spring apart in fear. 

“Y/N! I left my key inside!! Hobi’s back and downstairs in the lobby!! Can you open the door!” Taehyung’s loud voice sounded muffled behind the door.

“Are you freaking kidding me?” You mutter to yourself in frustration. 

“Y/N? Are you there?”

You jump to your feet and march over to the door. Opening the door only a crack, your angry eyes bore into Taehyung gleeful ones. 

“What’s with the face? Is it the Jaehyun thing because darling, men ain’t shi-”

Jungkook clears his throat from behind you, causing Taehyung to furrow his eyebrows in confusion. “Is someone there with you?” He looks over your shoulder to see Jungkook sitting impatiently on your couch before a look of realization crosses his face. “Oh my god,” he whispers to himself. Grabbing the doorknob he send you an apologetic smile before shutting the door. You could hear his screams as he ran down the hall.

‘Hobi!! Our ship is in our apartment! Let’s go get some sushi!’ 

You turn around and send Jungkook a flat look. He stands up and swiftly walks over to you. “Now, before we get any other interruptions,” he cuts himself off and finally smashes his lips against yours. His long awaited kiss was actually being written in history and he was elated. You felt like mush in his arms, allowing him to hold you as you melted in his grip. 

Never did you think that the wary barista would actually accept being your friend but willingly in love with you? That was something you couldn’t even imagine but you couldn’t be more grateful.

[lozzypoz321]

Word count: 1.5k

Warnings: swearing, mentions of sex, Kind Ransom, I don’t thing there’s any others but if there is let me know!

A/N: I’m really proud of this and it isn’t really something I’ve ever done before so I’m quite nervous but excited to show you, I got this idea off of @stargazingfangirl18 and thanks to @canadianhufflepuffavenger for helping me with this and plenty other of my works, hope you enjoy!

Thrombey AU headcanon

It was hard being a Thrombey

Especially since you were the younger sister of Ransom Drysdale, Andy Thrombey and Steve Thrombey

They were easily your favourite relatives, all at number 1 because of the simple fact they were triplets

You were an angel to your parents, but when it came to your brothers, it was a battle on who could insult each other the most

Ransom would never hold back

Andy was always doing it secretly: whether that be writing stupid insults on a napkin at dinner or whispering it to you when your parents weren’t looking

Stevie just didn’t want to hurt his younger sister's feelings: although he had no problem being the one that started the biggest fist fights between his triplets.

“Brat” was always Ransoms go to

But technically he had a point

Whenever you didn’t get your way all you had to do was pull out the puppy dog eyes and no one could ever say no

How could they?

Since you were the youngest in the family it was an expectation to be adorable

So, you used that to your advantage

One day at the Thrombey mansion a visitor arrived

It was safe to say they were a stuck up rich couple

Your parents had invited the family to a dinner with them and their son.

Older than you, but he acted like a two year old with the way he started crying when he got told he couldn’t get his 6th TV

When the couple asked about you and whether you would be able to visit their mansion to have a “play date ” with their son, all you had to do was act innocent

Slipping your hand into your brother Andys, who was sat next to you, both eyes started to tear up

Inside your head was just providing commentary

“I would rather chew off my own foot”

It was a surprise that those acting lessons that your grandfather bought you a couple years ago started to pay off

Everyone instantly started worrying

“Oh what’s wrong?!”

“Are you okay?”

“What happened?”

Including your brother Andy who held you, basically on his lap and rubbed your back

Even in the midst of all the questioning you kept a straight face

But in the corner of your eye you could have sworn you saw Ransom smirk at you

Eventually Steve figured out what was “wrong” from his spot across the table

“Do you not want to go?”

The triplets were horrors with each other, it didn’t even matter if your parents were around

Hair pulling was common

So was tackling

But most of all, it was arguing over who you loved best

“I’m her favourite!”

“No way Andy, I’m the obvious answer”

“Shut up Ransom, she likes me best!”

“No way Steve!”

But you always said to each of them you loved them the most

Separately of course

Even at the dinner table they argued

It didn’t matter where it was, or what it was about

Just as long as the three of them had different opinions it was always gonna escalate to yelling and more often than not, punching

They all each had special things that you’d do together

It was normal for you to hang out in Steve’s room most often since it was the calmest, although sometimes you left the room so he could talk to his boyfriend, Bucky Barnes, in private

Both Andy and you had movie binges, mostly horror and you hid in his arms but he wasn’t complaining

Ransom would say this was a lie anytime he got confronted but, you and him listened to audiobooks while he cuddled you. (Fun fact: Ransom is a big hugger whether or not he admits it)

As you all got older and the got into their late 20’s and still lived in the house, you moved into the end of primary school things started to change

They decided that they no longer wanted to live in the wreck they called their home and moved out and on with their separate lives

No longer were you in a house full of noise where your brothers were yelling about stupid stuff and running into your rooms at random moments and chatting with you for no reason

It was as though they had disappeared off of the face of the earth

And you were alone

For the longest time you wondered whether they had forgotten about you

Until one day your brother Ransom, pulled up outside the mansion in his beemer and sunglasses equipt

It was easily one of the biggest hugs you’ve ever given him

And you were pretty sure you saw him tear up after it but he just denied it immediately

So he took you to his house and broke the news to you that you now were living with him permanently not that you were complaining

You also found out Andy had got himself a job as an assistant district attorney

Which you had no idea what that meant, and Ransom didn’t either

And Steve has got himself a Job at Stark Industries where, coincidentally his childhood “friend” worked there as head

You were pretty sure he’d shagged him to get the job but…

And so then immediately Andy and Steve said they wanted to see you

Which you accepted, even though you were still a little salty they hadn’t been in contact with you for like 4 years

Steve may or may not have started crying to which your other two brothers rolled their eyes

Probably thinking “how am I related to this?”

The food was good at the takeout

Andy apologised for not coming to get you long before Ransom did

And you also found out he had a new born kid called Jacob

But you refused to be called aunt. It just sounded weird.

“So you're staying with Ransom?”

“Yep, if he’ll shut his gob”

He just rolled his eyes at you

“I forgot how fucking annoying you were”

After that Ransom picked up a new iPhone for you with one of his “many stacks of cash” as he put it, so you could keep in touch with your other brothers

And to call sos on them when you heard “sounds” coming from across the hall where his bedroom was

When you were in the middle of high school you went to live with Andy for awhile to give Ransom a breather from having a teenager in his house 24/7

You became quite good friends with the toddler despite the prominent age gap and you were even the person he came to when Jacob had nightmares

Something Andy took a photo of when he went to wake you up one morning when he found the two of you curled up on your bed

It was blackmail, so whenever you stole one of his T-shirt’s and added it to the pile of Ransoms sweaters you’d stole from him, sometimes you’d have to give it back so he didn’t send the picture to his brother

Only sometimes though

The boy still had pity in him

So then on a Friday night when you were watching a movie you suddenly got a text from your other brother, Steve

Apparently he was getting married?!

And guess to who?

Bucky fucking Barnes

Who would’ve thought.

Talk about childhood sweethearts

Andy was very proud of his brother for getting married and gave him advice for what to do and not what not to do

But Ransom though, he was pissed

Now he was gonna have to go to a wedding. A wedding.

You honestly couldn’t care less though, quite happy for my brother

Ransom was also surprised he was gay but we’ll just egnore him

The food was very nice there

You were even a bridesmaid, which you had objected to at first but Steve said you had to do it or else he wouldn’t even get married at all

Peer pressure that was.

Ransom hated everyone there

Apart from you of course

His own words, not yours

Everything went surprisingly well, your brother and Bucky both got their speech perfect and no one forgot any thing

After the ceremony and meal Steve decided he wanted to go out for takeout before the honeymoon with the four of you (that being his boyfriend husband, you, Ransom & Andy)

You sat across from the newly wedded couple and you and your brothers on the other side

Steve asked you where you’re gonna stay now

Ransom was quick to offer up his place

“It’s no big deal, she can stay me”

Andy just smirked

“What’re you bloody smirking about An’?”

he just denied it

“It’s really a pleasure to meet you (Y/N)”

Bucky told you, now directing his attention to you since you’d both not talked nearly the whole day

“Aren’t you like… my brother in law now?”

“Yeah, I am, only if you’d be willing to be my sister in law”

He was really quite nice

Ransom wasn’t so accepting though

Andy and Steve just told him to shut the fuck up

And that led to the three of them bickering the whole way home and occasionally a few hits, while you and Bucky just walked behind them shaking your heads

Brothers really never change

You would know

Written by me. Wattpad; @Lozzypoz321 Tumblr side acc; @padfootbuckster Pinterest; @lozzypoz321

PLEASE DON’T COPY MY WORK 💖

@marvel-ous-hobbit @snarky--starky @stargazingfangirl18 @rae-is-typing @canadianhufflepuffavenger @an-adventureland (if you would like to be added to the tag list, please don’t be afraid to ask!)

[seijch]

ANNOUNCEMENT: NOT A HELLO, BUT NOT A GOODBYE EITHER

omg hi ... im like . ashamed to come back after saying brief hiatus in october and then disappearing off the face of the earth til FEBRUARY but under the cut i will be explaining myself and the following, if youre interested (and a tl;dr at the very bottom if you don’t wanna scroll thru this obnoxiously long post):

the reason(s) i was gone for so long

what i was doing during that time (its just a personal account yall can scroll past this idrc)

the status of those um . halloween requests

the future of this account

i. so . Hiatus .

i know. i know . i probably mentioned it when i made the announcement post, but my mental health likes to go on one of those rides. yknow the ones where you go like up rlly fast then down maybe and then up then DOWN .... its like that. i needed a break and every time i wanted to come back or thought about it, something would happen and i would get stuck in my own head.

a big reason for getting stuck in my head was (and i hate to admit this ... i hate to admit that i have Insecurities On The Internet) my feelings of inadequacy regarding my writing. i love to plot fics, i love concepts and characters and making little headcanons but i dont ... know if i love writing rn. and i thought for the longest time that like . whatever ill just push thru it its fine ill be fine but it kinda wasnt lmao you can kinda see it in my halloween reqs and what become of them when i get to that but i began to feel like nothing i had put out or would put out would hold up prose wise (and normally i dont feel like this im much more “idc its my life im living it” but thats not a rant for tumblr LMAO). i still feel like that -- like im better as a reader than a writer. but . You Know :-)

tl;dr: mental state go brrrrr

ii. anywhere here’s wonderwall

when i left, i was in a steadily decreasing mental and emotional state, made worse by a situation at work that really was a case of petty jealousy on my end and rlly isnt very consequential now despite how much pain and resentment it gave me when it Was a problem so i wont get into it. the tl;dr of november and december was me using work as an crutch and distraction -- i know my job, i do it well, it helped me not think about my responsibilities and obligations and inadequacies. of course, as the holiday season grew busier n busier i was scheduled so often that i moved 88 or so miles (according to my apple watch, which i ONLY wear at work since im never anywhere else outside my house) and fell into a cycle of showering n sleeping at my house before going back the next day. (theres definitely something to be said abt capitalism and “grind culture” here but once again its not the time or place snsjkdfds)

at the turn of the new year, i happened to remember a birthday card i hadnt filed away for safekeeping from a friend of mine that id been horribly out of touch with til that point. i started crying because i realized how out of touch id been in general up until that point. the month of january was great for me: i was focused, happy, and in a much better place than i had been before. the end of it brought me down focus wise and im hoping that enough time away from my distractions will refocus me bc i ... need it LMAO and though ive burned out from that level of productivity and gotten distracted again im ... trying to stay positive which i think is the most i can do 😁👍🏼

media wise, i got real into stardew valley (but burned out bc i played it extensively as a way to wind down after work), the pokemon platinum romhack renegade platinum (still havent finished it bc of school n i played it w the intent to see if i could nuzlocke it ... bitch its so hard but its so fun bc of it), briefly assassins creed: odyssey (im one of those ppl who completes an entire region before i move to the next so you can tell i burned out of that one + wouldnt have the time to properly devote to it even if i didnt), got back into genshin impact after pulling for xiao (after not touching it for like . months), and danganronpa. yes . danganronpa 😐 i Know. i stopped playing it after the second trial of the first game bc i was so hurt by the outcome and picked it up in late january only to get sucked in (thank god i had the foresight to buy the second and third games during the steam winter sale). rn im at the start of chapter 4 if anyone wants to come in my asks and um . talk to me abt danganronpa

tl;dr: I’m Into Danganronpa Now

iii. you realize halloween was three months ago right

i mentioned this in the first section, but i love to plot things. every request is plotted or at least has a solid foundation. i had fun detailing what concept i wanted to go with considering what i was given, and there were some bangers i might touch up in the future. but heres whats going to happen to the requests themselves:

there are two finished requests. one will be posted tomorrow and the other will be touched up (just bc i finished it doesnt mean its good 🧍‍♂️) and scheduled for next saturday. as for the ones i never got around to ...

i will not be finishing those requests. i hate to be That Person, but i feel like we all expected this 🧍‍♂️ what i will do is post all of my notes for each request in batches -- requests that have an @ to go with them will be mentioned in the post proper, but anon asks will be pictured. (there are some asks that came from blogs who are now deactivated but i wrote down all the prompts and remember most of those askers so ill cross that bridge when i get there) there will most likely be an excerpt or two simply bc i think i mightve written a few plot points or interactions in the form of bullet points. i rlly am sorry about doing this but i remember looking at my notion doc with all the prompts and feeling ... like i wasnt measuring up n it wasnt just to myself or to some intangible concept of “other” id constructed but it was instead to those who requested n actually WANTED to see and hear and read my writing and i ...... im gonna admit thats another big reason i avoided this site.

regardless, youll definitely get what i have (and likely more than just my bullet points and illegible handwriting).

tl;dr: im sorry. what i have in terms of plot, concept, and interaction for every request will be posted, but i cant say ill ever complete them and mean it.

iv. so what now?

well i mean . im not entirely sure how sold i am on haikyuu in the content creation department (as a creator n to a lesser extent, as a consumer). as mentioned previously, its no longer my primary focus. it doesnt mean im not into haikyuu anymore; i have a lot of love for those boys but i cant rlly say im even caught up w recent fandom activity and also havent even finished s4 pt2 LMAO thats on my to do list

and despite all that, i still want to share my plots n concepts and snippets and maybe even fics. it wont happen anytime soon. it might not even happen. but i mean . its better than me saying i wont write ever again shjdkfs but either way ill probably use this blog as a personal blog w the occasional ask game for dialogue prompts (those are always so fun i love making up aus to fit like . the most mundane prompts)

as for my works (past and any potential future), ive opened an ao3 acc here n ill be editing n possibly expanding on my old works to post there. tumblr, to me, is The x reader hub, but i figure more x reader fics on ao3 is never a bad thing.

ill be deleting/posting drafted posts to the queue since they were all meant to be queued anyway as well as (sorry again 🧍‍♂️) deleting or answering asks in the inbox. (moots if you get a notif from me saying i rbed your post from months ago ... mind your business) im very hard to get ahold of and its ... a problem. expect an overhaul of the nav n shit to reflect my new direction n also because i feel like i cant tell if my passion for carrd is shared by the majority HSDKLFS maybe its better to read my info in a normal post ykwim .......

and of course . if youve read all this n decided im no longer worth the follow, i sure as hell cant stop you. thank you for wanting to, at some point, hear what i have to say -- it means more than you think.

tl;dr: writing will be edited and reposted to ao3, this blog will be a personal blog with a hint of writing (sometimes)

the tl;dr to end all tl;drs:

im back! i wont be as active as i used to due to a lessened interest in haikyuu in general, but i have an ao3 acc now where all my past work will be edited, possibly expanded, and reposted. any future work will also find itself there. my halloween requests will be posted in batches as incomplete concepts, plots, and snippets of scenes; i wont be promising to finish any of them.

there are still fic concepts im attached to and want to finish, but i cant promise any more writing on my end. this blog will be a personal blog with maybe writing, not a writing blog with my personal thoughts all over it.

regardless if you stick around or not, its been crazy sexy cool (equal emphasis) being on haikyuu tumblr even tho i wasnt around for long ... even tho its not my main focus anymore, im still excited to see what the future might hold 🤝

love, ari 💌