#i bully them too hard with my card assignments to chance it

[sunrisespeedway]

The Hanged Man - Alexander Rossi

Upright, the Hanged Man can represent sacrifice, uncertainty, surrender, and new perspectives. Reversed, it can mean stalling, indecision, discontentment, and stagnation.

I went back and forth on whether or not I wanted to make Rossi this card. Eventually, I gave in. Him getting dropped by McLaren and his subsequent unemployment era was too much for me to ignore.

This is the card that won the poll! The other two options were tied, but I think the next card will be the Emperor.

[letarasstuff]

Doesn't she love me anymore?

(A/N): This was requested by an anon, I hope you like it as much as I do!

Summary: Spencer's daughter starts to question why her mother left the small family early on

Warnings: Mentions/undertones of bullying, an absent parent and descreptions of the concequences for the child, So. Much. Angsty. Feelings.

Wordcount: 2.5k

✨Masterlist✨ _________________________________

“Daddy?” Spencer turns around from the frying pan to look at his daughter. Against common belief, he is quite the cook. But this only started when he became a father, after he realized a child won’t be able to live off of a diet consisting of coffee and anxiety, just like he did at the time. “Yes, Sweetheart?”

She looks down to the piece of paper on the kitchen counter in front of her. “Why did Mommy leave us?”

The spatula falls to the ground. It’s a question the father did not expect on a Tuesday morning before school. “It’s because of me, isn’t it? She saw me the first time and didn’t want me anymore. It’s my fault Mommy left us, left you, just like Linda said.” Tears begin to stream down her face.

“No no no”, her father is quick to turn off the heat and walks around the island to hug his daughter. “None of this is your fault. I don’t know what this Linda said, but it is not true. Your mother had her own reasons to stay out of our lives, but it has nothing to do with you.”

This doesn’t calm her down. “What are her reasons? Why did she leave us? Why did leave me?” Frantically she tries to keep her sobs down in order to speak. Spencer never has seen her this upset.

“Sweetheart, are you sure you are in the right state to talk about it now? Why don’t we calm down and get something for breakfast on our way to school and talk about it after I pick you up this afternoon?” He suggests, hoping the thought of a cup of hot chocolate from their favorite bakery would help her.

(Y/N) looks up at him with bloodshot and glassy eyes. Snot runs down from her nose. Spencer is quick to get her a tissue and make her blow into it, cringing internally about all those germs. “Do you promise to tell me more after school?” Big eyes look up at him and the father hurts. It hurts him, because there are so many things in her future that will break her and all that because of her mother. He can’t shield her from all of it, as much as he wants to he isn’t able. Because there always will be people, people like this Linda, who will make the girl conscious of her absent mother.

“I promise”, he tells her and holds his little finger out for her. (Y/N) smiles while linking hers with his, knowing her father will keep this promise just like any other of his. “Good, and now pack up we got a bakery to visit!” Quickly the girl grabs the piece of paper in front of her only to shove it into her backpack.

A little later she sits at her desk and looks at her teacher expectantly, just like her fellow classmates. “Ok children, today we won’t work further on our addition and subtraction worksheets-” The teacher’s sentence is cut short by the eruption of cheerful shouts. Just (Y/N) looks at the multiplication sheet in front of her.

The teacher is quick to quiet the class again. “Instead we will continue our work on the mother’s card you started doing yesterday. Linda was so kind to tell me that you don’t have the chance to finish them at home, because your moms are there. That is why you do it here and your worksheets at home.”

With a frown on her face (Y/N) pulls out the blank piece of paper that made her feel bad ever since her teacher handed it out to her yesterday. While everybody around her chatters happily with other classmates, she just stares at the paper. It is a reminder of something she doesn’t have, something she lacks and will never get: A real mother. A hug from her mother. Not even the motherly reassurance one gets after a nightmare. Nothing.

“Hey orphan. Ya realizing your mom doesn’t love you and that’s why she left you?” Linda, someone (Y/N) later learns to call a Mean Girl, struts up to the younger one’s desk. A sigh leaves her lips before answering. “You do know for an orphan I need to have neither a mommy nor a daddy. And I do for a fact have a dad, a loving one actually.”

A more light than hard slap on the back of her head makes the girl’s body jolt. “I don’t care, but I know that your mom hates you enough just after looking at you to know she doesn’t want anything to do with you.” After that Linda goes back to her table, leaving (Y/N) feeling more miserable than before.

Some starring on the paper later her teacher passes her table. “Is there something you want to talk about, Sweetheart? You seem very sad.” That is an obvious fact. Finally the girl is able to lift her gaze. “Miss Ramirez, I don’t know what to do.” This is probably the first time ever she said this sentence in school.

“Mother’s day is in a few days, Sweetie, and this is why we all make these cards. It’s a thank you to your mom and a way to show her how much you love her. You love your mom, don’t you?” The shake of her head shocks the teacher. Immediately an alarming signal rings through her head, because this is a red flag. “Why? Did she do something?”

“Miss Ramirez, I don’t have a mommy. She- she left Daddy and me.” Tears fill (Y/N)’s eyes. Her teacher is quick to hug and sush her. “Oh Sweetie, this is not a bad thing. I’m sure your mom loves you very much, even if she is not there with you. Do you wanna go out for a bit to calm down?” Meanwhile she connects the obvious signs of a single dad in her mind. Missed parent teacher conferences, unnecessary hovering over the child and the tendency to be categorized as a helicopter parent. Yes, Dr. Reid ticks all of those boxes.

It’s the second time of the day that an adult asked (Y/N) to calm down, and frankly it doesn’t really help with the situation at hand. “Can I do my homework outside? It’s too loud in here”, she asks between sniffles. Both of them know that the class’ volume is not the real reason for the request. “Of course, Sweetheart. If you need something, just come in and ask me. Alright?” (Y/N) nods and gets her multiplication sheet and a pencil before leaving the classroom.

At the end of the school day, Spencer is there to pick up his daughter. For days like these, where are no cases, Hotch gave him a free pass on (Y/N)’s very first day at school to leave the office earlier to be able to pick her up himself. As a father and someone who works the same high demanding job as him, he knows that little things like these are often the most important. And even if there were a case today, Spencer would have stayed back. He promised his daughter the truth and this is what he is going to tell her.

“Hey Dr. Reid. Do you have a moment?” Her teacher greets him at the classroom door. Concerned about his child’s wellbeing he nods and follows her back out of the room. “I gave the children the assignment of creating a card for their mothers, because mother’s day is rolling around. Today (Y/N) told me her mother left you, is that right?” This is the moment Spencer connects the dots. This is the kick off that made her question her mother’s motives about leaving all of the sudden.

The young doctor clears his throat. “Uhm yes, that is right. Actually, I’m going to talk to her about it right after school on her demand.” Miss Ramirez nods with an understanding nod. “Thank you for your honesty, Dr. Reid. I also want to warn you, in two days we will hold a celebration in honor of mother’s day with the kids’ mothers. You are invited as a father, because this is a special situation. But I also give (Y/N) a free pass for this event. It can be very traumatic for her.”

The dad thanks her, but his thoughts are somewhere else. He is mad. He is mad for his daughter, because she will always be the one with a “special situation”. The odd one, because yeah, it isn’t uncommon for fathers to leave (which isn’t anything less sad and traumatic), but an absent mother hits differently.

But Spencer is also hurt. Hurt, because for her young age, there is already the word “traumatic” thrown around. No, it isn’t enough that her dad works a job with the risk of him not coming home from a case again, or being the target of an enemy. No, she also has to go through the experience of missing a parent, never knowing how her life would be if it wasn’t for someone like her mother.

Even with Spencer trying to fill that role, there will be a time where (Y/N) will ask herself all of the “what ifs”. He can’t stop it from happening, and that is his biggest pain right there. Because he can’t shield her from her own thoughts. At the age of six she already is a bright, brilliant and talented mind. Now in a few years or maybe just months, she will start to think about her mother being the root of her pain, bad experiences and hurt. Her thoughts will lead to a downward spiral of how a person can do something like her mother, who acted like that with the knowledge of which consequences will follow. And Spencer can’t stop this from happening.

“Daddy!” A small thud comes from (Y/N) colliding with his leg. Just by the way she squeezes it he knows that she hasn’t had a good day at school. “Hey Baby. Do you want to go to the office for a bit? I think your Auntie Penelope told me something about a new science set she got for you. Or do you want to go straight home?” Spencer asks after lifting her into his arms. Immediately she hides her face into the crook of his neck. “Home”, she murmurs. Home it is then.

“Aaaaaand here comes the little missy’s hot chocolate!” The father says in a funny voice while carefully putting the cup into his daughter’s hands. She sits covered in a blanket on the sofa, looking expectantly at her father.

Spencer sighs at the lack of reaction. “Are you sure you want to hear it?” (Y/N) nods adamantly. “Ok, but I got to go a bit back for this story

“It was about eight years ago, I worked on a case with your Aunties and Uncles back then. I was the one who had to get the last round of coffee for the night at a small 24/7 diner. As I walked in I thought I died, because I was sure an angel stood right in front of me. Well not-” “Is that Mommy?!” (Y/N) cuts him off excitedly. Spencer smiles slightly. “You need to listen to the story!” The girl shifts in her seat. “Right, sorry.”

As I was saying: well in front, because she sat at the bar waiting for her order. I nervously ordered the coffees and had to begin three times, because I kept messing up, mesmerized by her sole atmosphere. As the waiter went to put the coffee pot on, the woman turned towards me and introduced herself. After that she asked me what I was doing late at night in a small town like that and we somehow forgot everything around us by just talking. After that we stayed in touch. Six months later we became a couple, she moved to DC in order for me to still be able to do my job here.

“Two years later your Mom got pregnant with you, and it was quite a surprise to us. But we felt ready at that time and so she moved in with me and we had you. The first few months were great, we couldn’t be happier. BUt then you continuously became ill. At first just a cold, then the pocks and so on. I think it was the third night in a row where you held us up all night. I took a year off from work to care for you with your Mom. I carried you through our apartment the whole night, giving you a bottle, singing, reading, doing anything.

“Then I saw her standing in the doorway. Even though there was baby vomit on her sweatpants and I had never seen her eye bags being this dark, she was the most beautiful woman to me. I approached her with a smile, but her frown only deepened. I thought it was because she worried about you and your health. Instead she told me she can’t do it. She can’t be a mother, that she wasn’t cut for this job.” Her exact words still resonate in Spencer’s ears to this day. He knows exactly what she said, word for word, and they never stopped to sting any less.

“So Mommy left us because I was too much trouble?” (Y/N)’s voice sounds even sadder than before. “No, it never was because of you. She knew exactly what it meant to have a child. Your mother knew what kind of work it takes and what the future brought. You have absolutely nothing to do with it. Some people are just not made to be parents and it’s better when they realize it themselves and leave the situation.”

(Y/N) nods, her mind running wild. All of that makes plenty of sense but at the same time not. “Sweetheart, that doesn’t change the fact that I love you and I will never leave you. You are my everything and I’m so happy to be a dad to such a wonderful little girl like you. I want you to remember that your Mom may not be here with us, but she still loves you. And I’m here for you, for anything you need, want or don’t want. Do you understand me?”

She nods again and curls up into her father’s lap. “Can we watch something?” She asks after a bit of silence, where both of them indulged their own thoughts. Quickly the TV turned on and some kids movie plays. The rest of the day the small family spends all the time cuddled on the couch, because at the moment they need to feel the other there with them.

The next two days Spencer calls (Y/N) in sick at school and himself at work, because together they fly to Vegas. Just because her own mother wasn’t ready for the job, doesn’t mean they can’t appreciate the work her grandmother did as a mother. That and you never know how much time you have left with the people who are dear to you.

Taglist:

All works:

@dindjarinsspouse @big-galaxy-chaos @jswessie187 @kneelforloki

Criminal Minds:

@averyhotchner @mggsprettygirl @herecomesthewriterwitch @ash19871962 @ellyhotchner

Spencer Reid x child!reader:

@ilovetaquitosmmmm

[arigatouiris]

is that how it’s supposed to go? // tendou satori

Author’s Note: Tendou is babie and I love him so much my heart hurts. I can’t write angst for him, yanno? He’s so precious I wanna give him the world. PLEASE TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED TO HIM AND KUROO IN THE END thanks I love ya’ll, hope you like this

Word count: 4817

Pairing: Tendou Satori x Reader

Warnings: light angst, fluff, childhood friends, mentions of divorce

Sometimes, things got a bit too much for Tendou Satori.

It wasn’t unusual for him to cry about not having friends, but he didn’t cry where tears were shed. Tendou often just muffled his emotions, rather than expressing them—because what was the point, after all? Being named ‘Satori’ brought in a lot of hate, and he was growing to hate his own name because of it. It was the sort of feeling that left him wanting for some sort of approval from others, even though his parents often told him that he had to give himself that approval first.

But, how could he?

Just as he walked out of his house’s gate, his eyes flashed to a large truck three houses down. He blinked before tilting his head a bit, blowing his hair away from his eyes. There was a man and a woman, taking out things from the back of the truck, and that was the first time Tendou laid his eyes on you.

You were crying, holding on to a doll in your hands; your grip on the inanimate object was rather tight, but Tendou could sense how deep your emotions were. He often felt that way, even though he never openly cried, but watching you cry there, loudly—your cries echoing across the area, sent a tinge to his heart that felt rather odd. He felt like crying because you were crying, and it was odd because he had never seen you before. The woman, he assumed was your mother, turned to you and patted your head before kneeling down to your level and saying some words of assurance.

Tendou gulped before walking away; he was getting late to school anyway. It was his final year of elementary school. Most of his classmates hated him, so there was no hidden excitement lodged in his heart right then to even go to school. Letting out a dramatic sigh, he walked to school, feeling lonely and small, and wondered how much longer he had to feel this way.

Upon reaching his class, he quietly sat to the seat that was assigned to him, which wasn’t by the window or the corner. He was somewhere in the middle, the second column, and the seat to his left was empty. No one wanted to sit beside him, an understandable fact, but it pained his heart to live with it as a fact. When the teacher arrived, Tendou didn’t look up. There was no point to giving the day any more attention than it deserved; after all, each day was the same.

     “Class,” The teacher announced, “We have a new classmate joining us today!”

Great, he thought before pouting a bit, Another one to the list to call me monster. Tendou didn’t dare look up at his future possible assailant, and he wasn’t planning on moving an inch till the class ended.

     “Why don’t you introduce yourself to us?” The teacher whispered.

     “I...” The person sniffed, clearly crying, which made Tendou pause for a second, “My name...” 

Slowly, the class was filled with snickers—people were giggling at this new person who was crying whilst introducing themselves. Tendou looked up and his heart sped up when he spotted you—the very same girl that had been crying earlier in the morning today. You were wearing his school’s uniform and your hair had been neatly combed to stay away from your face. However, you looked devastated; almost as if you didn’t want to be here. He noticed that your lips were quivering, and he felt utterly miserable that the class wasn’t even trying to understand your predicament. 

What was so funny while you were standing there crying?

When the laughter in class increased, Tendou frowned before pressing his lips together. He wasn’t brave enough to stand up and do something, but he kept his gaze on you; intense and warm, hoping you’d get to see it. You started searching the classroom for one face that wasn’t laughing at you, and you found Tendou’s intense glare.

He wasn’t glaring at you, and you had no idea how you came to know that. Gulping, you took a shaky breath before licking your lips.

     “My name is (l/n) (y/n)...” Your voice broke in the end, but when Tendou smiled at you, your heart skipped a beat.

It was quite obvious now that you were asked to sit beside Tendou, because that was the only seat that was empty. You weren’t crying when you reached your seat, but you were still very sad. You had moved from Osaka to Miyagi; your father had a job that made him move quite often, which left you devoid of a chance for a normal school life. You made friends easily, but if you kept moving the way you were, it was hard to stick to any of them. You were a mess when you arrived, and you were still a mess now. 

     “Are you okay?” The red-haired boy asked you.

His hair was a bowl cut and his eyes were rather large, and he had a strange face that made you want to smile more at him, because that strange face had a very addictive smile. You sniffed before shaking your head.

     “My name is Tendou...” He avoided telling you his first name before he looked away.

You tilted your head before wanting to ask him about it, but you chose not to. You instead answered his question first.

     “I moved here from Osaka...” 

Tendou made an ‘o’ with his mouth before asking you, “Did you have friends there?”

You paused a bit before thinking and then shaking your head. Tendou grinned before telling you something that inevitably changed your final year there.

     “Then why be sad? You can make friends here!”

And you did. 

*

After just a week, Tendou and you were as thick as thieves. You’d gotten quite comfortable with everyone in just that week, and it was rather easy. Everyone seemed to dislike Tendou, and comfort didn’t always mean you were happy. You were comfortable telling Tendou’s bullies off, and they could do nothing about you in hindsight. 

     “Tendou-kun?”

The two of you were currently on his house’s terrace, building a house of cards. Since Tendou lived only a few houses away from you, you often went over with the excuse of doing homework and spent hours just watching anime or playing. Sometimes, he’d ask you to play volleyball with him, just to spite you for fun, considering how bad you were with handling a volleyball.

     “What?”

     “Why won’t you tell me your first name? You know mine.”

His eyes widened. Of course, he did know yours. But, if you knew his, you’d make fun of him too. You noticed how hesitant he looked and that confused you, and as much as you wanted to comfort him, you didn’t even know what about his first name was bothering him.

     “Is it funny?”

He shook his head.

     “Is it... weird?”

He paused, looking down at the ground. The silence that grew between you felt almost like a burden, and you inched closer to where he sat across from you. You ignored the house of cards, you knew you could always build one again later. Right now, nothing mattered more to you than Tendou’s first name.

     “It’s...” He took a deep breath, “...Satori.”

He immediately shut his eyes and waited for you to laugh. He expected you to laugh first before pointing your finger at him and telling him off; he waited for mean words to slip past your lips and to have you call him a monster. But when no sound came, Tendou opened his eyes and slowly, he dared to meet yours.

You were wide eyed, almost as if you had learned something amazing. Your gaze was simultaneously both invasive and immersive, and Tendou felt strangely vulnerable under its intensity. Your pupils were glittering, and your lips were forming a very wide grin, and it felt as if you were peering through the keyhole of his heart.

     “(l/n)?”

     “Satori-kun!” You exclaimed, eyes still sparkling. “I love your name!”

Suddenly, Tendou felt a surge of energy upon catching your words—a joyful thrill that settled in his stomach, arced up through his lungs and flashed into a spontaneous smile on his face—which scrambled his ungrounded circuits and tempted him to chase that very feeling constantly. When you spotted Tendou grinning, and grinned back, giggling at how happy he looked.

     “Satori-kun has such a nice name,” You said, in awe, and he merely just watched you, his heart ricocheting like crazy, “And I’m stuck with (y/n).” You ended with a pout.

Tendou gasped before standing up, almost ready to fight, “(y/n) is such a lovely name! I’ll fight you if you say it’s bad!”

You looked up at him with wide eyes and giggled some more, “Satori-kun, you’ll fight me if I say my name is bad?”

     “Yeah, because I don’t think it’s bad.”

     “Because you’re a sweet person, Satori-kun.” You whined.

     “No,” Satori said, “It’s because I’m being honest.”

Perhaps, he had learned to love his name more because you were so proud of it. He happily placed his happiness inside the palm of your hands, entrusting you with it; he trusted you with his life, the boy who had seen no light from an external source, and had found it in you—a girl he had seen crying her heart out the first time he met you. For some reason, your good nature stirred his own inside of him, which intended to change him. It brought out a side in him he never knew he had, and for that, he was grateful.

That entire year with you, Tendou knew he liked you. It was the strangest thing because you were the one to tell him, and it was such a matter-of-fact statement that it felt as if there wasn’t anything unnatural about it. The two of you were once again on Tendou’s house’s roof, trying to finish up homework because the walls inside the room bored the both of you.

     “Ne, Satori-kun?” You were always the first one to get distracted.

     “Hm?”

     “You’re my boyfriend, right?”

His eyes widened at your blatant statement and he turned to you as if you were mental. 

     “What?! Since when?”

You pouted, “What do you mean since when?”

Satori leaned back, “Well, you never told me you liked me.”

     “Is that how it’s supposed to go?”

Satori nodded, “Someone confesses first and then they go out on dates and stuff.”

You gestured to the both of you and said, “Isn’t this like a date?”

Satori hummed before tapping his chin like he was deep in thought, “I guess. But, you still didn’t confess to me.”

     “Hah!? Why should I confess to you?”

He scoffed, “Because you’re the one calling me your boyfriend.”

     “Does that mean,” You tilted your head before your eyes met his, “You don’t want me as your girlfriend?”

Suddenly, Tendou felt an emotion he hadn’t felt in years; in fact, Tendou felt something so blatantly new that it shook him. That he might have forgotten about completely if his emotional playlist hadn’t been left on shuffle—a feeling whose opening riff tugs on all his other neurons like a dog on a leash waiting for him to open the door.

He shook his head, “Girlfriend sounds lame,” You froze at his words, “You’re like my wife, aren’t you?”

     “Ehhh?” You laughed before throwing an eraser at him, earning a chuckle from him in response.

But, in your laughter he saw acceptance, and in his chuckles you saw candid seriousness. The sound of cicadas rang in both of your ears, hunger rumbled in your stomachs, but your hearts were full. It was a blissful feeling.

*

Blissful feelings don’t last, or that’s what Tendou told himself as he entered Junior High without you.

It had been close to six months since you had moved out of Miyagi, back to Osaka. For some strange reason, your father stayed behind; you moved, your mother moved, and your grandmother who was staying with you had moved as well. Since you weren’t close with anyone else in class, there wasn’t anyone Tendou could ask, and his parents didn’t say anything either. He missed you, no, he ached for you, but you weren’t there. 

You could have exchanged emails, but since Tendou and you were always together and due to the fact that you were not allowed phones yet, you never had the chance to. He recalled his father once telling him that some friendships were only supposed to last during childhood, and while he didn’t want that to be true with you, he was seriously starting to doubt everything at this point. Missing someone was easy if only they hadn’t lived in such close proximity; everything Tendou did reminded him of you, everything lived, breathed, and moved you in essence, and unlike what they told him about missing someone and feeling sad, Tendou only missed you and felt angry.

At least he had volleyball, right? Junior High wasn’t as bad because Tendou had learned the art of making others uncomfortable about him. If they were scared of him, if they called him a monster, then so be it. He’d behave exactly how they expected he would—but he’d be better. Tendou had discovered what he liked, what he disliked, and he strove for it; it was unbelievable how much you had influenced his thinking.

You’re a sweet person, Satori-kun.

I love your name, Satori-kun!

Ah, it had been four years now and he still missed you. Entering High School seemed easier, and he was now expecting people to walk over and make fun of his name, just so that he’d join in. Oh? You want to see what else this monster can do? He’d block every single volleyball coming his way, and the look that was left behind on his opponent’s face was everything. It was because he wouldn’t let their words bring him down, it was because he was much, much more.

Only, the bullies outside the court of volleyball stopped affecting him now as well since you had given him the approval he had been longing for. You may have left Miyagi, but your essence stayed behind with him, he remembered you; and you had liked him just as much as he liked you.

Whether he gave it credit or not, Tendou knew that this was what had shaped his ability to be proud of his own prowess. You had given him what he needed right when he needed it, and his growth had only been imminent. For that, he would always be grateful; despite the pain you had caused after you left.

     “Wakatoshi-kun!” Tendou exclaimed, bending down to his side just to spot any change in expression on his rather stoic friend.

Ushijima turned to the middle blocker and blinked, wondering what Satori had to say. Sometimes, the setter was certain that a few things Tendou tended to say were rather unimportant. 

     “Have you ever considered missing practice?”

     “Why would I miss practice?”

Satori shrugged, “Just because.”

     “That’s not an excuse at all, Tendou-kun.”

Satori sighed; having a friend like Wakatoshi was amazing in almost several ways, but he was not you. Tendou sat across Wakatoshi in his dorm room and smiled to himself as the stoic friend read his latest JUMP comic. Tendou leaned back and fell against his bed, thinking of you.

      “Why don’t you find my name weird?” 

You looked at him like he had said the most dumbest thing you had ever heard. Tendou almost looked hurt with the look you had given him.

     “Satori-kun,” You grabbed both of his hands in yours and stared him in the eye, “I think you’re amazing!”

Tendou remembered blushing at how blatant you were; he admired that about you. You were just... honest. Sweet. Pure. 

     “Amazing?” He knew what he was doing. He wanted you to say nice things. He never wanted you to stop. 

And while he believed you didn’t know he was just fishing for compliments, you knew. And goodness, you’d give this boy compliments any time of the day. Your smile grew and you nodded.

     “Just imagine the look on people’s faces as you prove them wrong about you,” He could feel the warmth in your fingers. “Satori-kun, I look at you and all I can feel is how much better I can be overall as a person and as anyone I want to be! You make me want to be better!”

Tendou let out a sigh, alerting Wakatoshi. 

      “Is something wrong?”

He shook his head, “Just reminiscing, Wakatoshi-kun.”

Wakatoshi appeared like he understood what his roommate was saying, but he was kind enough not to pry. After all, people tended to need an extension of their personal space as often as the requirement to pause and breathe in the middle of practice. It was just as essential. 

Tendou missed you for the entirety of his Junior High, and first two years of High School. He had imagined you being there with him, where he could finally understand his feelings for you and ask you out proper; but that chance was stolen. Of course, he’d had crushes before but none of the girls compared to the image he had of you. Of how you would be if you were still around; how your hair would look, how tall you’d be.

But one thing Tendou couldn’t forget was your smile.

*

Sometimes, things got a bit too much for Tendou Satori.

It wasn’t always that Tendou felt sleepy during the first period of class. But, because practice held on for too long in the morning, and the fact that he had woken up a bit late and had to rush to practice meant that he had to keep his eyes peeled open forcefully. 

     “Class,” The teacher announced as soon as he walked in. “We have a new student today!”

A new student in the third and final year? That too in Shiratorizawa? The student must be a nerd or something. Tendou’s eyes were heavier than boulders right then, but if he had kept them open for just a few seconds, he would have had the air knocked right out of him. 

But, you did it for him instead.

     “Hello, everyone!” Tendou’s eyes were closed at this point, “My name is (l/n) (y/n). It’s nice to meet you all!”

Boulders? They were feathers. Tendou looked up and spotted you—you! You, in all your splendour, bowing and smiling; and when your gaze met his, he saw the glitter in them just like he had seen back when you told him you liked his name. His heart skipped a beat, and he could swear that his fingers were sweating. There was no way. You could not be here.

Immediately, he slapped himself on both cheeks, alerting the entire class. The teacher himself looked perplexed, and you just stood there, smiling, biting your lip so you don’t break out laughing.

You had almost forgotten how important Tendou was to you, until you saw him right then, slapping himself for not being able to believe you were in his classroom. Unfortunately, unlike last time, the only empty bench was somewhere in the front, away from where Tendou was. You sat down, arranging your things down and turned to spot him, his eyes fixed on your form. You offered him a kind smile, but seeing no smile from him worried you. Sure, he was shocked, but he had to feel something, right?

Was he mad that you had left without saying a word? That would make sense considering how close you two were. You turned away, feeling the gloom stick to your eyelashes, something Satori caught in a blink of an eye.

After class, you walk over to him, unable to hold yourself back. Tendou stood up, towering over you—your eyes were wide at how tall he was now. He smiled at your reaction before asking if you were willing to step out for a bit. You nodded, quietly following him; the air around the both of you was comforting, but at the same time, it was quiet, and it was the sort of quietness that had never existed between the two of you before. It made you feel tense.

     “How... How are you?”

He wondered if you’d still call him by his first name. It had been close to five years now. 

     “Taller, (l/n)-chan!”

It felt like he had slapped you by calling your last name. Your smile doesn’t fade. 

     “Definitely a lot taller than I expected, Satori-kun,” You pressed, looking up at him hesitantly; you noticed his eyes widen just a bit before pressing his lips together.

He was holding back. There were clearly many things he wanted to ask, but he wasn’t. You wanted him to. 

     “I should apologize—”

     “Why?”

     “Eh?” You look up at him, turning away, his hand rubbing the back of his neck. 

Your heart broke at how detached he was right then; but you deserved how he was being right then. You had left him, without offering any explanation or even a goodbye. Your eyes softened at the thought of leaving Satori alone especially when he had trusted you so much. But, just thinking of him was also taking away the fact that moving away had hurt you too.

     “Mother and father got a divorce,” You said, looking at him, “I moved with mother and grandma. Back to Osaka.”

He had expected that was what had happened as he grew older. But when you confirmed it, there was a tug in his heart.

     “You didn’t tell me...” 

     “I couldn’t. It was all too sudden. They separated before the divorce and I... I couldn’t face you,” 

He was confused. He looked at you, waiting for you to explain.

     “I didn’t want to make you sad. I know I made you feel worse by leaving without saying anything, but to come to you and say ‘Hey, I’m moving away again’ right after we... right after we had...” 

Right after we’d joked about being married.

Tendou could quite practically hear your thoughts. In your own way, you were trying to protect his feelings and while that was noble of you, it was also a tad bit selfish. 

     “I’m truly very sorry, Satori—”

     “There’s nothing to be sorry about, (l/n)-chan,” Tendou said so kindly that it sent shivers down your spine, “It’s all good now.”

You looked at him expectantly, something eating away at your heart. Please, you asked, but you didn’t know for what. Don’t, you begged but you didn’t know why. Tendou waved at you before walking back to class, leaving you there with wide eyes.

You opened your mouth to say something, but you closed your lips together and let out a breath. 

*

As days passed, Tendou noticed how you made friends with others rather easily. You were easy-going, and he also discovered that you didn’t stop speaking to him. You’d greet him whenever you saw him, and he’d catch you turning back and looking at him whenever something funny happened in class.

His heart ached the entire time, however. He wondered if it was possible to like someone for that long, especially when things were confusing as they were right then? Surely, your reason was more than valid and after sleeping on it for a few days, Satori had realized that as a child, there was no possible way for you to have thought ahead and pictured how leaving without a word could have hurt him more. You were trying in your own way, and that itself should have been good enough.

And it was, clearly it was, if Satori could tell himself that much.

But, why was he still pushing you away? It was evident that you didn’t want to be pushed away, judging from how you kept speaking to him; how you tried to inch closer and closer to him each day; how warm your smile was every single day toward him. 

He had missed you so much and now he was ruining it by being confused for all the wrong reasons.

It was close to 9 p.m., right before the curfew hit Shiratorizawa dorms. Practice had ended long ago, Wakatoshi was reading a book and Tendou was lying on his bed as usual. 

I love your name, Satori-kun!

Definitely a lot taller than I expected, Satori-kun.

     “I’m still Satori to her...” Tendou said, staring at the ceiling.

     “To who?”

Tendou’s eyes widened before he turned to Ushijima, who was eagerly looking at Satori as if he had said something of significance. Did he think I started a conversation with him? Ah, no.

     “You need more friends, Wakatoshi-kun.”

     “Is there a reason why you say so?”

     “Just...” Satori rubbed his face, “I don’t know, don’t you get bored?”

     “It’s hard to get bored when I’m dorming with someone like you, Tendou-kun.” 

Tendou looked at Wakatoshi and blinked, “Eh?”

     “You are constantly catching up. That makes me want to be better.”

Tendou’s eyes shot up like saucers. Hearing him say those words reminded him of a particular someone. 

Satori-kun, I look at you and all I can feel is how much better I can be overall as a person and as anyone I want to be! You make me want to be better!

Ah, shit.

Sitting up quickly, and almost alerting Wakatoshi, Tendou stood up from the bed and grabbed his jacket. Ushijima merely watched the redhead put on his jackets and outdoor shoes before rushing to head out. It was almost past curfew, but that didn’t matter to him, apparently.

     “She’s here, Wakatoshi-kun!” Tendou exclaimed, as if sudden realization dawned on him. “She’s here, she’s actually here.”

     “Who’s here?”

     “My life just returned to me, Wakatoshi-kun. I’m wasting time by not claiming it, you see.”

Again, Wakatoshi was used to it by now; nodding at whatever Tendou tended to say. Sometimes, the redhead made no sense to him, but right then, watching how Satori rushed out made him eager to understand. Perhaps, it was something important after all. And matters of prime importance must always be tended to.

Tendou knew heading to the girls dorm would require some skill at not being caught. He knew a way to sneak to the back, but he had to alert you somehow. Spotting a random girl who was heading to the dorm, Tendou threw a small pebble at her before alerting her attention. She walked over to him with fearful eyes, wondering what a boy was doing here at this time.

     “If someone sees you—”

     “I’m trying to confess to the love of my life. Can you please ask (l/n) (y/n) to come out? She’s a third year—”

For some reason, the girl just nodded and rushed inside, cooing. Satori knew he had to wait, but the wait was excruciating. His heart was beating loudly in his chest, and a large grin settled on his lips. After what felt like an hour (but only 10 minutes) later, you showed up, swearing sweats and a casual tank top. Your face was flushed and you looked like you ran.

     “I never really asked you out back then, did I, (y/n)-chan?”

You teared up at what he called you and chuckled, “Is that how it’s supposed to go?”

Recreating an old conversation from your past was sweet, but Tendou didn’t want that conversation. He walked over to you, inches away from you and held your hands. Ah, he thought, feeling right at home.

     “I thought you were mad at me.” You whispered, looking at your connected hands.

Satori shook his head, “Never mad at you. It’s almost impossible to be mad at someone like you. You quite practically ran inside my head for five years.”

You looked up at him before letting out a chuckle. Reaching over to him, you pressed your lips against his before he pulled you closer to him by pressing a hand to your lower back. He had kissed a girl before, but she had not been you. The feeling this gave him was much, much more significant.

A second later, he pulls away and places his forehead against yours. His hands were on either of your cheek and he just breathed.

     “I’m so grateful to you,” Satori said, eyes closed, “You’ve been so nice to me.”

     “Says the boy that made me smile while I was crying.”

A short few seconds of silence passed, and Satori realized that his new favorite thing was hugging you when the two of you were supposed to be in your dorms.

     “Ne, (y/n)-chan?”

     “Hm?”

     “You’re my girlfriend, right?”

The resemblance to your old conversation made you smile, but this was not that time. This was something else.

     “Yeah,” You tightened your grip around his waist, “Yeah, I guess I am.”

[dragons-socks]

Baby Bumblebee chptr 4

////////Six Months Later\\\\\\\\\

Bee was walking home from school. Lennox and Ironhide were hunting down Decepticons in Europe, so he didn’t really have a ride today, which was fine. He didn’t mind not going back to the house when Lennox or Ironhide wasn’t there. It’s not that Bee didn’t like Sarah or Annabell, but they just didn’t really get each other. Annabell tried to poke at every nerve Bumblebee had, just testing his patience. And Sarah either babied him too much or acted as if he should already know how to do some complex human thing.

And then there was school. Apparently, Sarah was right about his name. Though Bee still didn’t understand how a girl in his class can be named ‘jasmine’ after a flower, but to be called after the insect that lets that flower grow and flourish… that’s taking it too weird? Not to mention no one in the institute knows morse code, and only a few, including his teacher know sign language. The school said they’d set him up with an interpreter. That has yet to be seen.

“Oh, hey, you’re Honey Bee, right?” Bumblebee jumped as a boy his physical age tapped him on the shoulder. Bee pulled out a small keyring of flash card that said common phrases to help him interact with people who couldn’t understand his other forms of communications. He tapped on the one with his actual name on it. “Oh, well I’m Raven.”

Bee made a saluting gesture; instead of his hand being horizontal and pushed in front of him, his palm was vertical and facing out while his hand moved away to the side of his temple. Then, Bee finger-spelt the boy’s name. Raven looked at his hands with wide eyes.

“Woah, you really can’t speak, can you?” Raven asked. Bee let out angry trills, glaring at the boy. He started to walk faster, getting away from the human. “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that!”

Bee chittered, turning around and raising an eyebrow. You have one chance.

“I just didn’t want to believe Harvey. He’s always making up things about other people. My mom says he’s a bully.” Raven rambled. Bee nodded in agreement. Harvey was a larger kid in his class who kept trying to pick fights and make fun of Bumblebee. Bee would hand the kid’s ass to him, but he was still an Autobots and harming humans was still a big ‘no’ in his books. “We should be friends. I see you like Voltron. My favorite is the red lion, but the yellow one is alright too.”

Bumblebee shrugged, not knowing what this ‘Voltron’ was, but decided not to try to confuse the other with too complex interactions. This is the most pleasant conversation he’s had since being forced to partake in the human learning institution.

Soon Raven had to split off to go to his own home, but made Bee promise to meet up tomorrow to walk to school. Bee felt lighter for some reason, almost like he wasn’t so alone. Annabell picked up on his good mood as soon as he entered the house. A toy sailed through the air and whacked him in the forehead.

“Hey, Bee.” She smiled.

“Annabell, stop throwing toys. Go sit in the corner.” Sarah gawked. This turned into a ten minute scream-cry feast in which Annabell was forced to spend time in the corner for longer than her original sentence. Bumblebee was already set up at the table by this point, pulling out his homework. “How was school, Bee?” The woman said as she signed the words.

‘Good, I meet a new friend. His name is Raven.’ Bee signed, his feet kicking in the open air under the table.

“Oh, that’s nice, what did you guys talk about?” Sarah leaned over the counter, ruffling Bee’s hair. He huffed and waved her hand away.

‘He kept talking about some lion-show called Voltage or something? Said I liked it too, but I don’t know why he would think that.’

“You mean Voltron? Your bookbag is designed to look like one of the characters on the show. He probably thought you got the bag because you liked the show, not because it was yellow and black.” She explained, lifting up the bag in question. On the back in vinyl letters did read ‘Voltron’. “We could watch it. So you know what your friend is talking about.”

Bee shrugged at this. He’s tried to watch human entertainment, but nothing really caught his interest. Well, he’s only really seen whatever the Witwicky’s watched, and that was just through their living room window as he was parked in their driveway. Recently, Annabell has been making him watch her shows, which were all about learning numbers, colors, and being nice. At least she has her numbers and colors down.

“Yeah, it can be our thing, when you’re done with your homework we can watch a few episodes.” Sarah nodded to herself.

Annabell was returned from her sentencing. She shuffled up to Bumblebee, holding out the wooden block that she had thrown at him earlier.

“M’sorry, Bee.” She toed at the ground and gave him large puppy dog eyes. Bee huffed and took the block from her. He’s learned pretty fast to accept her peace offerings or have her throw another tantrum.

‘Yeah, I’m sure you are.’ Bee signed back. Annabell jumped around to her mom.

“Mom, what did he say?” Sarah shook her head at the young autobot. “He said, ‘apology accepted’.”

It didn’t take long to finish the easy equations or sentence structures his teachers assigned for his class. As soon as he put his work back into his bag, Sarah ushered him onto the couch and turned on their television.

“Get comfortable, sweetie, the first episode is the longest.” Bee wrapped himself in the yellow blanket that he’s since claimed as his own. As the episode went on, Bee found himself drawing parallels of his own life and the autobots to those of these characters. He was so immersed into this stupid cartoon that he didn’t even notice that Lennox had arrived and sat down next to his wife. Not until the episode was paused.

‘HEY!’ Bumblebee turned to Sarah, jumping a little when Lennox was also there.

“Hey to you too, kid.” Lennox said, his voice thick and his face contorted into worry. Bumblebee sat up.

‘Is Ironhide okay?’ Bee signed, trying to twist out of his cocoon to get a better look outside for the mech.

“He’s fine, Bee. But I do have some bad news. The Decepticons found the base. The Autobots had to be relocated and for your safety, we might not be getting their new location.”

‘But what about Ironhide? He still needs Energon to function. How will I find them once we’ve figured out how to change me back?’ Bee asked.

“They don’t think there’s a cure for you, Bee. Optimus thought it best to cut ties. Don’t worry about Ironhide. We’re still going to get shipments of Energon for him.” Lennox pulled Bee into his chest. Bee didn’t have room to sign his frustrations, but he also didn’t have energy to fight off his prison of warm arms. Instead he let Lennox’s voice swirl around his own thoughts that wanted to drown him.

_______________

Bee slipped out of the house. The moon, street lamps, and his blinking shoe steps were his only light to navigate out of the neighborhood and try to find his way back to Optimus. The mech might not want him, but that was where he belonged, and he wasn’t going to take no for an answer.

It wasn’t the first time that he realized that walking was much more time consuming than driving. This was just another time that the notion ingrained itself into his head. This was the first time Bumblebee found himself walking for a long time after sunset. It seemed to take longer in the dark. It took so much longer to reach the school than it usually does.

Maybe it wasn’t the darkness of night that had Bumblebee shuffling his feet. Maybe it was the thought of seeing Optimus and the others after a month of not seeing them. Maybe it was the knowledge that this was in direct opposition of Optimus’s orders. This is the most rebellious he’s been in a long time. Bumblebee finds his feet stopping. He looks around and realizes he’s walked himself all the way just a house past Sam’s. The chill has already settled into his skin, but he’s just noticed his minutely shivers. His teeth are chattering, and he feels tired seeping into the very marrow of his human bones. His feet and legs ache. It must have been half the night gone by now.

A rumbling sound brings the rest of the world back into focus. Cars race towards him, screeching to a halt and boxing him in. At first he thinks its normal bad humans, until he recognizes the cars and notices the Decepticons’ insignias.

“I don’t get it.” Starscream’s voice is audible from his vehicular mode. “There is but a human child where the signal emits. No energon, no Autobots. Nothing.”

Bumblebee’s heart spikes. He backs away from Megatron’s right-hand. The other ‘Cons have switched back to their natural state. They leer down at Bumblebee. One even tries to grab at him. He rolls to the side, and books it for a crack in their formation. Breakdown snagged Bee’s leg, scooping him upside-down, before he could make it. Bee kept hissing and sputtering at the Cons, but they weren’t intimidated.

“It appears, Starscream, that the boy is the origin of the signal. Maybe Knockout’s weapon wasn’t as defective as we had first thought. This human child does have a striking resemblance to their mute scout.” Breakdown muses.

Bee lets out sharp whistles, hoping the sleeping humans around them will awaken, but its almost no use. His vision starts to blur as the Cons start moving away. He doesn’t know what to do. He starts pushing against the metal fist around his leg, but with each shove the only result is his palms getting hotter.

Bumblebee can feel in his gut that Breakdown is about to shift. He can hear the t-cog clicking its gears in the split second preparation of turning into the alt mode. Bee panics, pulling his arm as far back as he could and smacking hard onto Breakdown’s grip. Instead of being halted by the warm living metal, his hand pushed in with no resistance. A shot of blue energy cut a path from his hand to the open sky. Breakdown drops Bee on the ground in surprise. Bee is able to twist himself to land on his back rather than just his head. He ignores the searing pain of smacking into the asphalt and scrambles away from his capture. The other Cons make a quick double-back, but not before Bee is on his feet. His palms and fingers tingle from the heat, but are unharmed from the powerful blast-ray. Cons surround him. He pulls his arm back and lets out another blast, sweeping his arm in an arc and taking out a line of the enemies, and also some of the residential appliances.

“Bee?” It’s Sam’s voice as he scampers out of his house in a shirt and boxers. “Where’s Lennox? Why are you here?” Bee doesn’t answer. He can’t answer. He sidesteps a blast from the Cons. Its not enough, Bee is grabbed again. His arms are pinned to his side in Starscream’s hand.

“I’ve got him, retreat.” Starscream proclaimed, ignoring Bee’s chitters and Sam’s shouts. A ground bridge was opened a few feet away. Starscream watched his men walk into the portal before turning to Sam with a viscous grin. “Till the next time, Witwick-”

Bee was once again hitting the ground. His back is singing and his ears are ringing from the gunshot. His vision is blurry, but he can still make out Mikaela cocking back a rifle as Sam ran to him. Sam carefully moved Bee away from the Decepticon, who was clutching his shot-up hand. There was a moment where it looked like Starscream was going to exact revenge. Luckily the portal behind him started to close and if he wanted a ride back home he couldn’t fight the humans. Everyone sighed with relief until they looked down at Bee.

The worried shouts of his friends were cut short as Bee’s small body finally gave it quits and fell asleep.

[fandomfanfics12]

For Blue, Blue Skies-Part 1

Title: For Blue, Blue Skies Pairings: Steve x tony Part: 1/5 Warnings: swearing, bullying, abuse (physical and verbal), blood, angst, fluff. Summary: Steve was sure he’d aced his latest test in his forensics class but as it turns out, Professor Fury failed almost everyone. In order to get extra credit Steve and his friends join a program that Fury called The Avengers to deal with a bullying problem at the nearby high school. Hidden behind the glitz and glamour of his father’s money, most people can’t see that Tony Stark’s life is a nightmare. All Tony wants is to get out of this hellish school as quickly as possible and get as far away from his abusive father as soon as possible.  A/N: This is based off of a nonnie’s request, hope you enjoy.

 Tony knew three rules.

Rule number one: remain invisible-hence the overly large black hoodie that disguised him amongst the crowd.

Rule number two: never tarnish the Stark name-homework was completed and assignments were ready to be handed in over a week early.

Rule number three: never let anyone know how much pain you’re in.

Rule number three was the rule that Tony struggled with the most, but if he kept to the first two rules then he didn’t really have to worry about the third rule. He stuck to the edges of the hallway to ensure he didn’t get jostled by any of the other kids. They were all so much bigger than Tony. He made it to his chemistry class and practically collapsed into his chair in the front row. The hairs on the back of his neck stood on end as he sensed the attention of some of his classmates shift to him. He squeezed his eyes shut and wished he could turn invisible. Wished that he could vanish, just so they’d stop looking. Just so he could get through the end of high school. It was bad enough that Tony had skipped a grade, bad enough that his clothes were all too big on him, bad enough that he was the short scrawny kid, but he had no friends and his father was rich. Everyone knew it and they all hated him for it.

“fuck you.” he whispered underneath his breath as the others around him stage-whispered insults.

“look at his hair, is he growing a mullet?”

“Would go with the homeless look, wouldn’t it?”

“do you think he’s just rebelling? No kid that rich dresses like that.” He wanted them to leave him alone. But he knew that ignoring it was better than addressing it. so he let them whisper, let them talk. And then Justin Hammer walked in, and Tony’s stomach dropped down and out of him. Please keep walking. Don’t notice me, take your seat at the back and move on. Please.

But Hammer didn’t take his place at the back, he kept walking towards Tony’s desk. The bright fluorescent lights perfectly illuminated the malice on Hammer’s face and Hammer reached into one of his pockets.

“Morning Stark, have you lost your marbles today?” Hammer asked and sat down in the empty seat beside Tony.

“Justin.” Tony said by way of acknowledgement and stared down at his homework. Justin was laughing, at what Tony wasn’t sure. He shifted uncomfortably, wishing he could just float away.

“Stark raving mad, that’s what you are. Just like your mother.” Tony flinched and dug his nails into his palms. They didn’t know what they were talking about. They were just dumb kids and one day Tony would be free of them. He could go to college and be surrounded by people who cared about learning just as much as Tony did. They wouldn’t bully him for being smart, they’d encourage him.

“Alright class, settle down.” It was Mr Coulson but Justin didn’t move to his assigned seat. Just watched Tony with eyes like a hawk and Tony’s stomach began to twist and churn.

“Stark raving mad.” Justin whispered right before he spilled water all over Tony’s homework. Tony shot up and out of his seat, but stopped before throwing a punch. He squeezed his eyes shut, let out a deep breath and counted to ten. He wouldn’t be violent, he wouldn’t be like his father. He couldn’t allow that kind of darkness to infect him. Tony sat back down but knew he had the attention of everyone in the room.

“What’s up Stark? Having an aneurism or something?” Justin asked and Tony gritted his teeth. He would keep calm, he wouldn’t lose it. he couldn’t afford to. If he got suspended he’d be left to his father and Tony couldn’t do that. This school, this hellish nightmare where he was teased and taunted and pushed to the edge, was Tony’s safe haven.

“go sit down in your seat Justin.” Mr Coulson snapped but said nothing about Tony’s homework. Tony slumped down in his seat and stared blankly at the whiteboard. He wasn’t insane, they were wrong. he just liked to learn and that made him different. But being different wasn’t so bad, right?

-

Steve walked to class, chewing some peppermint gum and carrying way too many books. He had to stop by the library to drop them off after class. But when he stepped inside his forensics class, the room was silent and grim.

“Take a seat.” The professor said and Steve dropped down into his chair beside his best friend Bucky.

“What’s going on?” Steve whispered while they waited for the last couple of students to show up.

“I don’t know, he just said he needs to talk.” Professor Fury could be a bit of an asshole, but he was an excellent teacher. Steve had originally hated the idea of taking a forensics class, but he soon found he enjoyed it. and he was pretty sure that was because Professor Fury was teaching it.

“someone said it had something to do with our last test.” Natasha whispered as she dropped into the seat on the other side of Steve.

“Good now that everyone is finally here,” Fury shot a glare at Natasha and Steve and they both sank down lower in their seats. He was in a bad mood today. “I would like to discuss the fact that almost every student in my class is failing.” Uh oh.

“Failing?” someone called out and Professor Fury nodded.

“Correct. Not one student got above thirty percent on the last assessment.” Shit.

“But I thought I did well on that!” someone cried. Steve forgot how to breathe. If he failed this class then he could be at risk of losing his scholarship. And then what? all his money went into his share of the rent, he couldn’t afford to fail this class.

“no, you all overthought it. you were so….clinical. there was no humanity in any of the answers. The subject suffered from a laceration to the throat which must have been difficult for the witness to see.” He read from someone’s test.

“Well it wouldn’t have been easy to see.” Bucky grumbled and Steve couldn’t help but smile a little.

“I’m disappointed in all of you. on the very first day of class, I told you all to hold on to your humanity. And you all failed me. but I’m going to go out on a limb here and offer you a second chance.” Steve straightened, his heart pounded in his chest. A second chance?

“There’s a program that the Dean has developed in collaboration with the local high school. He’s called it the Avengers Initiative. The high school has a serious bullying problem and you will be tasked with a student to look after. You will get to the bottom of the bullying and you will solve it. you will do this for the rest of the semester and earn extra credit for doing so.” Fury crossed his arms but Steve relaxed in his seat. That wasn’t so bad. And extra credit sounded nice.

“Aren’t there better qualified people to do this?” someone complained and Fury rose a brow.

“the dean hopes that your youth will enable you to connect better to the kids. Each student that solves one kid’s bullying problem gets an A.” Steve’s jaw dropped and the whole class was suddenly way more interested. An A would look excellent on his report card. It could help him keep his scholarship, and how hard could it be to tell a kid to stop bullying someone?

“When do we start?” Steve called out and Fury grinned.

“Tomorrow. I’ve emailed you all the details. Now, back to the lecture…” but Steve wasn’t listening. He could do this. he could get an A and save his scholarship. This would save him.

-

Lunch was its own infested nightmare. Everyone was shoved into one room for an hour and expected to get along. Tony would have hidden in the bathroom during the whole hour if it weren’t for the fact that this is Peter’s only opportunity to eat. So he got in line with all the other kids, tray in hand and he scooped everything that looked like it wouldn’t give him food poisoning onto his tray. Someone grabbed his shoulder and he flinched, dropping his tray.

“don’t touch me!” Tony hissed and found it was Justin, grinning and Tony frowned.

“What’s wrong Stark? It was just a friendly pat on the back.” He punched Tony in the arm and Tony had to count to ten again. He just had to get through this lunch hour.

“Leave me alone.” Tony bent down and picked up his tray off the floor, most of the food had spilled everywhere. Fuck.

“what’s wrong Stark?” justin asked tauntingly but Tony shook his head. Stay calm. He told himself and moved to sit at a table. He sat down and began to eat the one remaining half of his mac and cheese that hadn’t been utterly destroyed. Tony ate slowly, salvaging the taste, finally. His stomach rumbled loudly at just the taste, glad to finally get food. Tony couldn’t wait until he was old enough to move out. Then he’d be free.

“Stark raving mad! Stark raving mad! Stark raving mad!” Justin had started a chant and the others all chorused the words, booming around the cafeteria. Tony ignored it, food was his top priority right now. making it through the day, healing.

“come on Stark!” Justin pulled on Tony’s arm, dragged him up to his feet.

“Leave me the fuck alone!” Tony hissed, his anger rising.

“Oooh I’m shaking.” Justin laughed and Tony took several deep and calming breaths.

“Leave me alone.” His tone was pleading and Justin fed off of that.

“Are you going to cry? It looks like you’re going to cry. God, you’re such a fucking baby. Go back to your own year group.” He shook his head and slapped Tony’s back again, the cafeteria cheered. But Tony was seeing red from pain.

“Don’t touch me!” he shoved Justin back and Justin crashed into the closest table. The whole cafeteria fell silent. Everyone was staring, but Justin began laughing.

“you’re going to fight me?” he asked and came closer, getting right in Tony’s face. Justin was two heads taller and Tony had to crane his neck to look up at him. He was shaking, he didn’t want this. he wanted this to stop, but he felt trapped. It was going too far, too fast.

“Leave me alone.” Tony ground out, surprised at how steady his voice sounded. But justin pushed Tony and Tony stumbled back. He regained his balance, grabbed his backpack and began to walk away which made Justin laugh harder.

“I knew you were pathetic.” Tony faltered, his mind rolling back to the previous night. pathetic murdering piece of shit. Unwanted spoiled brat. Ungrateful beast. Monster.

“Fuck off.” Tony snarled, and that was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Justin swung, landing a punch on Tony. Tony immediately dropped to the floor, hands over head and breathing heavily. No. he wouldn’t be able to cover that up. Howard would know. Justin landed a kick to Tony’s ribs and Tony snapped.

-

Steve, along with his classmates, stood in the office of Midtown high school. The school, while famed for their harsh program and intelligent students, had a severe bullying problem and that was evident from the short walk to the front office. Steve was starting to feel nervous about this whole thing, what if he couldn’t pull it off? What if he failed? Then what?

“We’ve all matched you up with a kid who we want you to help out. Some of you have been matched with the bullied and others with the bullies. Help these kids find their way and professor Fury will give you an A.” god, it sounded so simple when he put it like that. The headmaster started calling out names and they all waited patiently, Bucky was paired with some kid called Justin.

“Steve Rogers and uh, Bruce Banner.” Steve nodded his head and took the slip of paper that said where Bruce’s first period class would be. He had an English class first period. The principal called out a few more pairings and then showed them all to a pile of school maps.

“good luck.” Were his parting words before he retreated back to his office. Steve shared a look with Bucky as they grabbed their school maps.

“I’ll meet up with you after and we can get some pizza.” Bucky said and Steve nodded.

“I’ll see you around.” And then they went their separate ways, entering the belly of the beast.

-

“You broke his nose.” The headmaster said yet again and Tony rose a brow.

“Did i? I don’t remember that. Think I might’ve blacked out.” Tony admitted and the principal sighed.

“And your father called, apparently you didn’t go home yesterday?” Tony stared up at the ceiling. He’d slept in a park, well, sleep was putting it generously. He’d closed one eye and been on edge the whole night. but it had been better than going home.

“So?” Tony asked and the principal shook his head.

“tony I really don’t want to suspend you, that will go on your record and your brain deserves to be challenged at a great college. But I will have to suspend you if you keep this up.”

“What was I supposed to do sir?” Tony asked, growing angrier with each passing second.

“from what’s been reported by other students, you were very violent. I want you to start seeing the school counsellor.” Tony crossed his arms and shook his head.

“No.”

“It’s that or suspension.” Tony sighed and looked up at the fluorescent light that was flickering.

“Fine.” He ground out, he had no other choice apparently.

“Excellent, your first session will be during lunch break.” Tony shot up out of his seat at that, his stomach growling at the mere thought.

“Lunch?” his only meal, vanishing.

“It’s quite alright Tony, I’ve already informed one of the lunchladies to bring a meal to you. now you should get to class.” Tony relaxed and nodded.

“Oh, okay. Thanks.” He grabbed his backpack and practically ran out of there, the hallways were quiet and empty. He was late.

“Ah, Mr Stark, finally decided to make an appearance?” the teacher rose an unimpressed brow and the whole class snickered.

“Sorry, I was with the headmaster.” Tony said as he sat down in his seat. The teacher rolled her eyes and turned back to the board. Tony glanced to the kid next to him-Bruce, and glanced at Bruce’s notes.

“You were an idiot for attacking Justin.” Bruce whispered and Tony’s eyes met his.

“Someone had to do it.” Bruce rolled his eyes and when Tony saw he hadn’t missed anything, he settled back into his seat.

“Entitled rich boy.” Bruce muttered and Tony sighed. He wondered what Bruce would say if he knew that Tony had slept in a park like a homeless person. What he would say about the bruises underneath his clothes, the ribs that stuck out a little too much to be healthy and the welts on his back caused by his father’s belt. Would he still be called an entitled rich boy then?

Ten deep breaths.

One.

Two.

Three.

“Can’t believe he broke Justin’s nose, imagine the law suit that’s waiting for him. They’ll send his ass to juvie, that’ll teach him a lesson about assault.” Someone stage-whispered.

Four.

Five.

Six.

“I guess Justin was right afterall, he really is Stark raving mad.”

Seven.

Eight.

Nine.

“Did you know he killed his mom?” Tony’s temper snapped and he turned around in his seat, he couldn’t calm the temper, couldn’t silence the rage, how dare they accuse him of that?

“Shut the fuck up before I break your nose.” Tony hissed and the girl rose her brows in surprise. She then burst into tears and her friend shot Tony a glare.

“That’s enough.” Miss Hill snapped and Tony hung his head, the anger dissipating. He’d given in to the anger, he’d made a girl cry. It made Tony feel all sorts of angry and ugly inside, angry with himself, angry at the world.

“Steve could you please escort Tony to the office.” Fuck.

“Sure.” The voice was unfamiliar and when Tony looked for the source he found it was someone sitting in the desk next to Bruce’s. the guy was undeniably attractive, with his messy blonde hair, fair skin and bright blue eyes-who wouldn’t be attracted to him? The guy stood up out of his seat and Tony followed in suit, only to notice that the other guy-Steve- was a full head taller than Tony. Tony followed Steve out of the classroom, keeping his movements slow and careful, his back ached from sleeping on a park bench all night.

“why do you feel the need to attract so much attention to yourself?” Steve asked and his voice echoed ever so slightly in the empty hallway.

“would you just sit back in silence if people said those things about you?” Tony snapped and Steve rose a brow. Tony could practically hear the thought go through Steve’s head, entitled rich boy.

-

Steve stared at the Tony kid in disbelief. Bruce had mentioned that there were kids who had it worse, had even mentioned Tony specifically, but Steve felt like the kid almost deserved it.

“You can’t just bully people out of retaliation.” Steve said and Tony rose his brows.

“bully people?” Steve crossed his arms, this kid practically had it coming.

“Yeah, you show up to class late, with a weak excuse might I add, and then you disrupt everyone and make some poor girl cry and-“

“She said I’d killed my mom.” Tony interrupted and Steve rolled his eyes.

“you interrupt people, I noticed you trying to copy Bruce’s work without even asking and you broke some kid’s nose.” Tony shut his eyes and Steve could’ve sworn the kid was counting. Steve felt like a jerk then, his purpose here was to improve the high school, not make things worse by upsetting one of the students.

“Are you like new here or something?” Tony asked at long last and Steve tilted his head.

“No, I’m a college student.”

“and you just usually hang around in high schools?” Tony asked, sounding more annoyed with each passing second. Steve just rolled his eyes.

“The Avengers program, my classmates and I are here to sort out your bullying problem.” Tony snorted and Steve stared up at the ceiling, the lights all glaringly bright.

“And so you decided to come on in here and judge me?” Tony asked and Steve felt a wave of guilt crash into him.

“That wasn’t my intention.” Steve admitted and Tony shook his head. Steve was aware that they were wasting time and that he really should get back to Bruce. But a part of him felt compelled to stay, to help this kid who was entitled and acted as if the world owed him.

“Let’s just get to the headmaster’s office.” Steve said after a long silence and Tony didn’t argue. They walked the rest of the way, Steve felt like he was supposed to say something to make things better. But he didn’t know what to say, so he dropped Tony off in the office and headed back to class.

[atinyan]

Bad Boy!Seonghwa x reader 

Genre : Angst, Fluff

5 months ago Seonghwa asked you out, and you have been in a beautiful relationship ever since. However, Seonghwa was of course the bad guy of the school and thought being in a public relationship would have people think he’s weak. Seonghwa isn’t the type to flirt with girls randomly either, so being him meant he completely avoided you in the halls, he wouldn’t even smile at you. You understood at first, because he always made up for it with some nice home cooked food, a movie marathon and sweet cuddles. You got to see another side of Seonghwa no one else did. Not even his closest friends.

But today, two members from his group, Mingi and San, decided to mess with you.

“Hey whore” San says and pushes your locker closed. You look at him shocked, wanting to punch him, wanting to talk back, but no words would come out of your lips, and your body was frozen. Mingi walks up to you with a smirk on his face, “hey whatcha got here?” He grabs a notecard. ‘Oh shit’ you thought.

Every day during lunch, you leave Seonghwa notes in his locker, he loves them because they encourage him throughout the day and he overall finds it so endearing. If his group isn’t up his butt 24/7, he gives you the same notes. Today you were too busy studying you didn’t have time to put it in his locker, so you were going to see if you could leave it by his car after your last class.

“Lets see, oh-” Mingi starts laughing while you're trying to get it but San has a good grip on you. “SAN- GET THIS HA- ‘I love you Seonghwa, with all my heart. Have a good day, love’” San starts cracking up so hard his grip on you lightens. Your cheeks heat up and you grab the note from Mingi and try to hit his arm but he grabs it in time. His eyes darken and his voice gets lower. “Oh you wanna hit me? I see.” He grabs the note from your grasp again and San pushes you to the floor.

You chase after them but they get to Seonghwa first. Tears are running down your cheeks and your face is flushed with embarrassment. “Seonghwa! Look at what this desperate chick wrote” San and Mingi continue laughing while you stand there and cry embarrassed. “Seo-Seonghwa I’m sorry” Internally, he's broken at your state, and warmed at what you wrote to him. He wants to hug you and tell you not to cry. But his pride of fitting in and being the bad guy takes over.

“You wrote this? Pathetic little girl. Please don’t sit near me in English, weirdo.” He tears the notecard and tosses it in your face before walking away with San and Mingi, who are still laughing. You pick up the notecard pieces and toss them away, your heart is shattered. You head to the bathroom to get cleaned up, but you only cried even more. A few girls who walked in offered a shoulder to cry on, and gave you their numbers if you ever needed anything. The act was warming but you can’t shake Seonghwa from your mind.

Eventually, the bell rings and you head to class. A class you unfortunately shared with Seonghwa and his gang. You held your head down and sat in a corner, tears still falling from your cheeks. Out of the corner of your eye you can see Mingi, San, Wooyoung and Yeosang laughing and pointing at you. “That’s enough. Stop calling them ugly, they’re not and you know it. You’re just jealous they were about to give Seonghwa a love card and not you” You heard Hongjoong said, the group’s unofficial leader. You’re glad your head is down because your face flushed even more as tears spilled out. The boys who were laughing shut up, Seonghwa was completely avoiding your gaze. He felt terrible but just wanted to make it through the day keeping up this act and then talk to you.

Yunho though was staring at you. He’s the class clown for a reason, he likes seeing people smile, not see them upset. Seonghwa glances up when he sees Yunho walk up to you. He says some lame corny joke that’s so lame you can’t help but let out a giggle. “Too bad they don’t have eyes for Yunho, they’re cute together.” Jongho says. Seonghwa is fuming as he glares at Yunho, not at you, no. He loves you and is aware of his jerk actions but is glaring at Yunho. The teacher walks in and Yunho leaves to go back to his seat with the boys, Seonghwa gives him one last glare before paying attention to the board.

“You’re getting assigned projects today. First, find your partners, I don’t care with who. Go.” Many people get up and walk to their best friends. “Sorry Mingi.” Yunho says as he goes to you, who didn’t seem like they had any partner in mind. “Want to be my partner?” He says and you nod your head. Mingi smirks and just works with San and Wooyoung. Talking about Yunho and you will probably date soon. Seonghwa still glares at Yunho as he sits next to Hongjoong.

Class is eventually over and Yunho says his goodbyes to you and walks out with Hongjoong and Jongho. You take your time since it’s the end of the day. “Hey Seonghwa lover” San says again and pushes you as you fall over on the desk a bit. “Ooo look her skirt rode up. Let me get a peak baby.” Yeosang said and they all laugh. You quickly fix your skirt and walk out quickly, tears welling up once again. Seonghwa was there, witnessed all of that and didn’t do anything.

You walk home, knowing you’re safe from the boys. They pick on a new person everyday, so you’re safe now. On your doorstep sits Seonghwa. “Oh no” you mumble under your breath. He notices you and gets up quickly. “Baby…” he says as he walks towards you. “You don’t get to call me that anymore.” You say with hot tears running down your face. “They-They bullied me and made sexual comments to me and all you did was sit there! You even called me pathetic!” He grabs your arms and pulls you into a hug. “I know I’m a jerk-” “Good I’m glad you noticed” You say as you get out of his grip. “Listen please. I feel awful. I really do-” “Prove it then Seonghwa. Just prove it. Because I don’t believe a word you’re saying” You walk into your house and slam the door, just wanting to get some good sleep.

The next day you walk in to school, head held a bit more high. Feeling glad you stood up to him. Your pride is soon shattered as you see the boys standing by your locker. But as you get closer you noticed half of them had bruises. As you approach, Seonghwa comes closer to you.

“I told them everything about us. Then I had Jongho, Yunho and Hongjoong help me kick their asses for what they did to you. Then Yunho and Jongho kicked my ass for what I did to you.” Seonghwa says, more ashamed at the last part. “I love you” He kisses you softly with everyone else standing there. “I dont deserve forgivness but if you do, I promise to never fuck it up. I will protect you from anything and everyone, I am not ashamed to show the world you’re who I love, and I will never, ever, be the cause of your heart break ever again. If I break anything I just said, which I will not, Jongho and Yunho aren’t afraid to beat my ass again.” He slightly smiles and waits for your response.

You think for a moment and kiss him. He smiles and kisses back, cupping your face and melting into you. “You have a second chance, because everyone makes mistakes. I trust you won’t break my heart again, but don’t fuck it up” You laugh and kiss him again. “Gross” Yeosang has a fake look of disgust on his face and Jongho hits his side.

Seonghwa pulls away and keeps his hand on your waist, putting his head in the crook of your neck. “I love you so much, forever”

[hartigays]

#44 for harringrove please!

44. Tentative kisses given in the dark.

the fan on the motel ceiling makes a soft ticking noise as it rotates. it’s the only sound that fills the room, save for steve’s soft breathing. he can’t tell if billy is still awake.

steve glances over at billy, on guard and ready to be pretending to look at literally anything else in the room. billy is awake, but he’s staring up at the ceiling. his fingers tap an offbeat rhythm on his chest. he doesn’t notice steve staring.

school field trips are the bane of steve’s existence. especially when they have to travel a long distance, because then it becomes an overnighter. which means surviving painfully long bus rides and sharing a room with whatever person he’s randomly assigned to.

with billy’s last name being hargrove, this has been a long time coming. but steve had assumed that when it did, he’d still hate the guy. not that they’d be tentatively standing on even ground. not that he’d have this - whatever this feeling is, thrumming constantly beneath his ribcage.

this feeling that makes steve feel hot and itchy all over whenever billy’s gaze is pointed in his direction.

“what?”

steve is startled out of his thoughts. he blinks over at billy, only to find him staring right back. steve’s blush probably spreads all the way down his body, right down to his toes.

“nothing, sorry,” steve says quickly. “zoned out for a second.”

billy is quiet for another long moment. he doesn’t look back at steve, but finally says, “can’t believe i have to waste a weekend watching cheese get made. fuckin’ stupid.”

“hey, at least we get samples,” steve offers, shrugging.

“i’m lactose intolerant, pretty boy.”

steve flushes bright red, clearing his throat. “oh. well, uh. that sucks.”

billy laughs, then sits up, shuffling around before getting up and walking to the window. he unlatches before raising it as much as he can, then lights a cigarette.

“are we allowed to smoke in here?”

“what, you gonna snitch?” billy asks, assessing steve quietly. steve watches the smoke curl up into the air for a moment before he sits up and heads over to where billy is standing.

“wasn’t planning on it,” steve tells him. he stares at billy expectantly. “what, you’re just gonna leave me hanging?”

billy rolls his eyes, but offers his cigarette pack. steve takes one, giving billy an appreciative smile before lighting up.

they’re halfway through their smokes before steve dares to speak again. he never knows how to act around billy, or what to say. or when he’s allowed to say anything at all. if he’s allowed to say anything.

billy hargrove doesn’t scare steve, he’s not the big bad bully he wants everyone to think he is. but their friendship, if steve can even call it that, is tentative at best. he doesn’t want to fuck it up by putting his foot in his mouth.

“why did you come if you can’t even eat cheese?” steve asks, blowing out pretty tendrils of smoke.

steve swears he sees billy blush, but he can’t be completely sure. billy shrugs, nonchalant. “better than being cooped up all weekend with my family. ‘s whatever.”

“i find it hard to believe that you couldn’t find something to do this weekend,” steve insists, stubbing out his cigarette in the ashtray on the windowsill. “the new king of hawkins always has plans.”

billy rolls his eyes. his cigarette is almost down to the filter, but he’s still puffing. “in order for that to be true, hawkins would need to get 500% cooler. small towns don’t have shit going on.”

steve will give him that one. “that’s true. i’m surprised you don’t throw your own parties, being the keg king and all.”

“jealous much?”

“just a fact,” steve says, giving his own shrug. he turns to walk back to his bed.

“think the couch would be less lumpy than these goddamn beds?” billy asks, finally putting his cigarette out. it’s burnt all the way to the filter.

“mine’s not that bad.”

“well, aren’t you just lucky,” billy says. he feigns sweetness, but his voice has an agitated edge.

steve sits on the edge of his bed, then pauses. he blinks down at the mattress, then back at billy.

“we could always -” steve starts before he can catch himself. he cuts himself off quickly, his mouth snapping shut so hard that his teeth click.

billy looks at him expectantly, one brow raised. “well? we could always...? what?”

“we could always, uh,” steve pauses, his cheeks heating up. “we could always just share. no big deal, i used to have to share with tommy whenever we had an away game.”

no one says anything. steve holds his breath, on the edge of his seat both literally and metaphorically. billy finally shrugs, sliding the window shut before walking around the other side of steve’s bed. he slips in next to him silently, shifting until he gets comfortable.

the silence that hangs between them this time is far less comfortable than the previous ones. steve feels like he has to hold his breath, has to keep perfectly still. like if he moves a muscle billy will bolt from the room like a scared animal.

when steve chances a peek at him, billy looks perfectly relaxed. he has one arm hooked behind his head, and his eyes are closed, his breathing soft and even. steve is almost certain billy is asleep, when finally he speaks.

“why did you come on this trip if you can’t sleep in hotels?”

“what?” steve asks, his brows knitting together. “who said i can’t sleep in hotels?”

“it’s two in the morning, we had a five million hour bus ride today, which you didn’t sleep on, and you’re still awake,” billy points out.

steve opens his mouth to answer, but he snaps it shut again just as quickly, billy’s words ringing in his ears. “you were watching me?”

he doesn’t get an answer. when he looks at billy, something warm blooms deep inside of him. something that makes his fingertips tingle and his heart race. because there’s no mistaking billy’s blush this time - he’s red like a cherry tomato.

and he won’t look at steve. even when steve pokes him with his toe, saying his name, billy doesn’t answer. he looks like he’s trying to pretend to be asleep, but it’s in vain. steve is wide awake now, his attention focused entirely on the boy next to him.

“billy.” he doesn’t say it so billy will answer, but he does wish billy would look at him. “billy.”

“i wasn’t watching you, alright? fuckin’ drop it, christ.”

steve sighs, trying to think of how to go about the situation. they’ve accidentally thrown themselves into unfamiliar territory, and the moment feels incredibly fragile. but maybe if steve can pick the right words, say the right thing, they can make even more headway. maybe they can continue making progress, if he plays his cards right.

but there aren’t any words that fit. none of them feel quite right. so steve reaches out a tentative hand, slow and steady, watching billy to gauge his reaction. the other boy doesn’t move. he’s almost like a statue. steve’s fingers finally come in contact with the pendant around billy’s neck.

the metal is warm beneath steve’s fingertips from being in constant contact with billy’s heated skin. steve chews on his lip, rolling the pendant between his fingers, watching it closely. billy still hasn’t moved, but the soft puff of his breath has stopped. he’s been holding his breath since steve’s hand made contact with the necklace.

“it’s okay, you know,” steve tells him, his voice low. gentle. “if you were watching me. i - you know. that’d be okay.”

the noise that escapes billy’s lips is almost like a whimper. steve’s eyes snap up and focus in on billy’s face. he finds blue eyes staring back at him. wide with something like fear, but also - wonder.

steve is feeling bolder. he places one of his hands on billy’s cheek. leans in, slow as ever. careful, cautious. billy doesn’t rear back, or try to slip out from under steve’s touch. so steve keeps moving, closes the gap slowly, until he’s less than an inch from billy’s lips.

“sometimes i watch you too, you know,” steve whispers.

and then their lips are touching, finally. tentative at first. shy, even. but then billy makes this noise, something that sounds a lot like relief. it has steve’s fingers tangling into his hair, dragging him close and deepening the kiss.

billy is incredibly warm. steve can feel the heat radiating from his body, and he instinctively presses in closer, trying to drown himself in it. billy’s shoulder feels incredibly broad beneath the fingertips of his other hand - steady and strong.

steve feels the sting of a bite on his bottom lip, and his fingers tighten both in billy’s hair and on his shoulder. he feels like he’s drowning in the feeling, like he’s floating. but eventually steve has to breathe, and he breaks away with a soft gasp.

it takes them both a minute to catch their breath, but billy hasn’t stopped looking at him. still with wide eyes, like he’s trying to figure out if this is reality or just a dream. he reaches out, capturing steve’s chin between his thumb and index finger.

he thinks billy is going to speak, but he just leans in again, hesitating for a moment. tentative again. his lips are gentler this time, soft and sweet. steve goes pliant, sighing happily. they kiss like that for a while, alternating between tentative and bold, growing familiar with each other.

time passes slowly. after a while, steve presses one last kiss to billy’s lips, nipping at his bottom lip. “so. you wanna ditch tomorrow?”

“god, yes,” billy agrees, “please. i can’t take another day of that shit.”

steve laughs, gentle and bright. “what do you want to do instead?” he asks, then grins cheekily. “doesn’t ice cream sound so good?”

billy groans and whacks steve’s shoulder, but he’s smiling like an idiot, too.

“you’re an idiot, harrington.”

“you love it,” steve hums.

billy blushes up to his hairline. he plays with steve’s hand, where their fingers are laced together.

“yeah, i do.”

send me a number + a pairing!

[izzy-b-hands]

Quarantine Tag Game

Tagged by @dabitchisback thank you!! I needed something to get me through this very slow morning of work!

Under a cut because y’all know I’m a wordy motherfucker lol.

Are you staying at home from school/work? 

Yes I am! I actually requested to be moved to work from home in part due to the COVID-19 stuff and due to some coworkers behaving like high schoolers and flat out bullying me (and I had had enough of that shit once it started making it hard to do my job lmao.) 

So just as they were setting it up for me, the clinic suddenly started realizing how serious this was and all of a sudden, they could find all the money for all the work from home equipment for a bunch of us in the non-direct patient contact side of things (funny, considering I’d begged to work from home over a year ago due to how bad my anxiety was getting with coworkers and patients when I was still in the direct patient contact part of it all, even offered to pay for the equipment, and was told it would always be too expensive and never be in the cards, even after my therapist recommended it for the sake of my mental health and blood pressure. Funny. that. Real funny.) 

If you’re staying home, who’s there with you?

Mostly my cat, Nisha. My mum works at the same clinic, but is front desk, so they’re rotating who goes in to the clinic and then who gets days off “to keep the financial health of the clinic” aka begging anyone who stays home for a day off (or in my sector who takes a day off due to reduced call volume) to take that time unpaid and not use PTO or EST...but we both have that time to use, so it is Being Used or we won’t be able to keep the lights on or the condo lmao. However, she does have assigned days off coming up, so on the weekend and those days off, my mum is here too. 

Are you a homebody?

Ohmygod yeah. The older I get, the more I dislike going out in general like. I work a full time job, I barely have time for chores or relaxation after, even now being work from home because scared patients asking you questions you can’t answer or don’t have an answer to (because no one has answers right now) just...idk how to explain it. But it gets weirdly exhausting, even though it sounds like it shouldn’t, and by the end of my 8 hours I just wanna lie on the floor and nap usually. So going out has never been my thing too much, because then my writing/chores/nap time gets neglected lol. I don’t mind the occasional appetizers and drinks night with mum and her friend, back when we could go out, but tbh it’s just nicer still to drink at home. Even on vacation, I go out more than usual, but also if there’s a night we can drink in the hotel with the mini bar, and just enjoy being somewhere other than home...I will take that night in a heartbeat. 

My anxiety also doesn’t love going out, but I’ve been working and getting better at dealing with that. Of course, current times might mean a bit of a setback, but I’m going to work really hard for it not to be too bad. I haven’t been in six years of therapy for nothing lol.

An event that you were looking forward to that got cancelled?

Um...does my root canal count? And I wasn’t really looking forward to it per se, I just am afraid of the tooth getting worse and starting to have worse pain. 

Other than that, it hasn’t been cancelled yet because we’re playing it all by ear (but I admit I’m afraid it probably won’t happen due to the virus stuff, even if it’s over by the time this thing was supposed to happen), but I have a trip to New York City planned with a good friend in August. Even if things have calmed down, I know New York has gotten hit extremely hard, and if they’re still fighting with the aftereffects of it all...might not be fully open for business by August so to speak. And besides, with everything as it is right now, and the talk of a vaccine being at minimum over a year away, with periods of possible social distancing needed even if this calms down but possibly goes through flare ups until a vaccine is ready...travel might not be back to normal for awhile, I can’t say more than anyone else on that I suppose. I’d really like it to be, by August, I admit that as selfish as it is. I was just really looking forward to it, kind of living for it even, and now...yeah. 

But, better to be at home and healthy in the end, travel insurance exists for a reason, and trips can always be rescheduled. 

What movies have you watched recently?

Haunt (Mum and I never got to see it when it was in theaters), Queen Rock Montreal (my go to oh no I’m sad movie), Tammy (a fave of mum’s, and we both just like Melissa McCarthy in general), and Jojo Rabbit. I’ve got a bunch I bought and rented just last night too (maybe not a smart financial decision, but I’ll deal with that when I have to lmao), since it feels smart of have a backlog of stuff to watch right now.

What shows are you watching?

Mostly rewatching the IT Crowd, the Office, Travel Man, and other tried and true faves. It helps mum to relax since she loves all those too (including any episodes of 8 out of 9 Cats Does Countdown I can find, I finally got her hooked on that!) Basically if it has a chance of Richard Ayoade or enough episodes to keep us going for a bit, then it’s on the list to watch.

What music are you listening to?

So many. No, but legit, I’ve been all over on Spotify as of late, especially searching for music to help the fic writing. A lot of Queen, Elton, Clams Casino, The Weeknd, Kendrick Lamar, David Byrne, Childish Gambino, St. Vincent, and Moses Sumney especially.

What are you reading?

Fanfic, trusted news sources like AP, Reuters, updates from WHO, wanting to reread Mercury and Me and Elton John’s Me, and really need to get back into reading And The Band Played on by Randy Shilts (started it right as shit started to get wild, so it got put to the side, but I want to finish it asap.) 

What are you doing for self-care?

Trying to enjoy that this is also the trial time to see if I want to make work from permanent (work is making me make it a trial, I’ve wanted to work from home for years so...yes is the answer to that lol) and what I can do now that I’m home, like work more on my writing and music. Not to mention, eating foods that normally upset my stomach/I have sensitivities to like meat and dairy (I might be developing straight up allergies to them, but we all know I can’t afford to see an allergist lmao) but that since I’m safe at home where I be sick and still work...I can indulge. I can also play music more and movies so long as I pause them if I get a phone call during work hours, so overall I’ve been a lot more relaxed and my BP is down during work as a result, which is something I’ve never really felt before in my life, and I’m rather enjoying. 

Aside from that, video games have also made a resurgence in my life, especially Saints Row, and that’s been fun as well. 

All of this in between taking care of Mum of course, who worries and panics, and tends to believe everything she hears and reads and watches without thinking critically or carefully, so...that’s been a thing. 

Actual therapy appointments would be my best self care of course, but the last few have been cancelled due to everything going on. This week, however, my appointment is supposed to be done via telecommute and I should finally get to catch up with my doctor, which I admit I need pretty desperately right now. It’s getting hard feeling like I’m on my own, helping soothe others but struggling to soothe myself most of the time. But, c’est la vie, right?

Tagging (if y’all feel up to it and wanna!): @skylinepigeon, @freebooter4ever, @bearkare, @rathernotmyname, @galaxy-starheart, and @youdontrememberthesomme

[raise-me-up-take-me-up]

Acceptance

A/N: I hammered this out to vent. All this happened to me less than 6 hours ago, every bit of it. Hopefully my groupmates don’t have a Tumblr. In the school au this goes before Stage Fright

Warnings: bullying

“Well, uh, I’ll leave now, I guess. Thanks, um, thanks for having me!” Virgil waved awkwardly, staring at the floor. His group had long finished the assigned groupwork and were instead watching K-dramas. Not to say that he didn’t think the dudes in the show were cute, but it was getting late and he had work to do. He jerked his thumb towards the door. “I’ll just, uh, head on out!”

Roman, Patton, and Logan glanced up at him from the floor. “Sure, man! See you!” Roman waved a hand. “I hope you can find your way out of my house because I am not climbing all those stairs. Alright, off with ya!”

Virgil slowly closed the door behind him.

He jolted in surprise as loud, raucous laughter suddenly tore through the air, emanating from Roman’s room. His eyes narrowed. He caught snatches of conversation among giggles and raised his eyebrows in surprise as he heard his name.

“I mean, I dunno…. Virgil’s kinda weird, but…” Patton seemed to be saying. Logan made a noise of agreement. The packet of chips crinkled. “He tries too hard to fit in if you ask me.” Roman cut in. 

Virgil glared at the wooden floor as tears threatened to spring in his eyes. After hours of them cracking jokes and getting along together, is this what they really thought of him? His nostrils flared in rage, and he whipped around. If they did the deed, they could reap the consequences.

He opened the door in one smooth motion and poked his head into the room, plastering the most polite smile he could muster. “Sorry, did I leave anything behind by chance?” And oh, the satisfaction he felt watching them scramble in surprise numbed his pain, even if for just a moment.

“No! I’m sure not, why do you ask?” Logan barked in faux laughter. Roman gave the room a cursory glance and shook his head vigorously. “No, no, you haven’t left anything! Goodbye!”

Virgil grinned like his heart wasn’t splintering. “Ah, yeah, okay. Thanks, see you Monday!” And shut the door. More laughter. “Do you think he heard? Probably not.”

He descended the stairwell, lost in thought. He couldn’t get past “They think I’m weird” without choking back tears. Why? Where had he gone wrong? Had he talked too much? Ate too much food?

Virgil blinked. He was in the living room, staring at a table of trinkets. He glared at a Pikachu Funko Pop. Seized it and-

He didn’t know what to do. He scowled, cold and hateful, but replaced it. They’d know if he damaged anything. He had to content himself with shuffling around the figurines. 

He didn’t remember the long walk to the bus stop, didn’t remember the longer bus ride home, didn’t remember anything on account of how numb he was.

“Virgil! How’d it go?” Demetri unlocked the door for Virgil but froze as he took in Virgil’s vacant expression. He led Virgil inside and gently sat him down. “What did they do?” He asked with barely contained rage, stroking his cheek.

Virgil blinked and tried for a smile but failed. “They- they don’t like me, Dee. They laughed at me when I left the room. I try so hard...”

Demetri enveloped him in a hug and felt his own heart shatter as Virgil started shaking with suppressed sobs. He carded a hand through his hair. “Here’s what you’re going to do, Virgil.” He instructed with measured calm. “Do they know you know?” 

A nod. 

“Good. Fuck with their heads, okay? Drop hints that you know, but act like you don’t. It’ll consume them. Can you do that?” 

A smaller, shaky nod. 

“Oh, Virgil… it’s not your fault. It never is. That’s just how the world is. It’ll try to tear you down.” “Doesn’t seem like a world worth being a part of,” Virgil croaked, wiping his face.

“It really doesn’t.”

Taglist:

@ironwoman359

@thanxolotl

@treehouseart

@ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2

@silver-owl413

@cats-vetal-miking-vomit

[exoticarmy127]

Waste It On Me (You, Jungkook, V) Part 1/3

🎵  “But baby I’m no stranger, to heartbreak and the pain of always being let go.” Waste it On Me by Steve Aoki feat. BTS 

“Jen? Are you okay?”

It was a Thursday afternoon when Y/N saw the girl hunched over in one of the aisles, way in the back of the small bookstore she’s currently in. The autumn wind has picked up outside since the sun dipped lower in the sky, preparing to welcome the lonesome moon, and she was just about to lounge in the backroom with a warm cup of tea when she spotted the girl on the floor who was obviously sobbing.

“Jen?” Y/N called again as she slowly walked towards young girl. Jen was one of the regulars in the store and would come in at least three times a week after school to take a book and hang out in one of the store’s reading nooks until the owner would announce closing time. They weren’t exactly close but well-acquainted, considering she was here every day, herself.

Jen looked up with swollen eyes and a runny nose, and Y/N couldn’t help but feel a pang in her chest at the sight. She had seen that face before.

“Oh. Y/N...” she began to stand, wobbling slightly as she tried to get her footing right. She dropped a crumpled up-red paper in the process and Y/N caught a glimpse of small hearts scattered over cursive writing on it. But before she could make out the words,  Jen was quick to manage herself and picked it up quickly.

“Are you—“

“I’m fine.” She said a little too quickly, a clear sign that she was not. Before Y/N could think twice of her actions, she stepped forward and pulled her into her arms for a hug, knowing for sure it’s the one thing she needed right now. The one thing she needed back then when she was the one curled in a ball with tear-stained cheeks; feeling like the world has crashed down on her.

“It hurts so bad.” She cried on her shoulder and Y/N sighed as she patted her back in comfort.

I know, I know, she thought. She knew exactly what a broken heart felt like.

~~~

FLASHBACK

It was a sunny Thursday afternoon in the fall when she first saw him.

Donned in a black, oversized hoodie over his uniform with large headphones in as he skated out of the campus gates, he was a sight straight out from any contemporary Young Adult novel. Y/N had been sitting by the campus steps when he skated by and it felt like time slowed for a brief moment… with skater boy taking center stage as if an imaginary spotlight had settled over his form.

It was then that Y/N knew he was different. He was special.

But that brief moment shattered when all of a sudden, a certain clumsy classmate accidentally tripped on the steps and spilled the drink he was holding onto her lap.

“Oh no! I’m so sorry!”

Y/N grimaced as she looked down at her lap, her school skirt and the edge of her blouse stained with pink, strawberry milk. She wasn’t sure how she would explain this to her mom later.

“Here. Take it, please.” Y/N looked up then to find unruly brown hair and large glasses upon pretty (panicked) eyes that would’ve been prettier if the glasses weren’t in the way.

“It’s fine—“ Y/N started to stand but the guy kept pushing his handkerchief towards her.

“No! I’m so clumsy, I’m sorry. Please, I insist. Do you need a ride home? I have a car. You’re Y/N, right?”

At that, Y/N paused, giving him an inquisitive look. “How did you know my name?”

The guy seemed to catch his previous statement and an evident blush colored his cheeks. “Oh u-uh… we—we share a class. English and History with Mrs. Jung.”

Y/N blinked, browsing through the faces of her classmates in her head just as a familiar head of hair sparked in her thoughts, one that sat at the front of the room in every class.

“Oh yeah, I think I know you. Kim—“

“Kim Taehyung.” He finished with a bow.

“Y/FN.”

“I know.”

Y/N smiled when he paused, which was quickly followed by an embarrassed look on his face.

“Anyways,” she took his handkerchief. “Thanks for this. I should get home, though. The milk’s getting sticky.”

“Let me take you home at least.” Taehyung offered once more.

“Oh no, it’s okay—“

“Please. I feel really bad about the whole thing and the least I can do is get you home a lot faster so you can get changed.”

And that was how Taehyung suddenly became a constant in Y/N’s life. With his sweet and lively personality, it wasn’t hard at all for them to become the best of friends. Days turned into weeks, weeks to months and months to a year, and Y/N began to know Taehyung like the back of her hand and vice versa. So well that Y/N could easily tell what runs in his head while Taehyung easily noticed his best friend’s admiration for a certain boy in a hoodie and skateboard.

“Jeon Jungkook.” Taehyung had said out of the blue while they were having lunch in the cafeteria.

Y/N coughed, almost choking on her apple. “What?”

Taehyung grinned, which almost looked smug. “That guy you’ve been stealing glances at for—“ he pretended to count the time but rolled his eyes in the end. “Since we got here?” He jabbed a finger over his shoulder, pointing at the back of the cafeteria where a familiar face sat alone in a table, munching on a sandwich. “His name’s Jeon Jungkook. He’s in my Calculus.”

Y/N tried to look nonchalant, not wanting to tell Taehyung that she already knew his name. She might have stalked him in the library once and took the book he recently borrowed to know his name written on the library card.

“So?” She grumbled, but she could feel the heat creeping to her cheeks as she bit into her apple once more.

“What do you like about him?” Taehyung asked, but this time his tone sounded a lot less cheery.

“I don’t like him!”

“Oh really?” Y/N nodded vigorously. He smirked as he placed his chin on the palm of his hand. “So, you just like randomly staring at people with heart eyes?”

“And what if I do?”

“You don’t stare at me like that.”

Y/N looked at him then but before she could read his expression, the warning bell rang, implying that they needed to get back to class soon.

“I don’t like him.” She said with finality in her tone as she gathered her things and left. As he watched her go, Taehyung sighed, knowing she was lying.

They both were.

~~~

Jeon Jungkook was no one special.

That’s what Y/N had been trying to convince herself for the past year since she first saw him riding his skateboard freshman year. However, the more she saw of him, the more curious she got. It was only during the second semester of her sophomore year did she get the chance to actually talk to the guy... when they shared a table in the library.

“Is this seat taken?” He had asked and as Y/N looked up from the novel she was reading, her speech seem to escape her even when actual words were staring right at her in the face with the book she was holding. At least she managed to shake her head.

“Thanks.” He pulled up a chair opposite her and as he set the book he was holding down onto the table, she smiled when she caught sight of one of her favorite books: a collection of sonnets from the one and only, William Shakespeare. She didn’t peg Jungkook as the poetic type, and Y/N would be lying if she didn’t say it was a good surprise.

“That’s a good one.” She blurted out and when Jungkook looked up at her, she panicked; realizing she just said it out loud. “The book, I mean.”

“Um. Yeah. So, I was told.” He deadpanned before opening the book.

“The author is one of my favorites actually. I mean, he’s Shakespeare, what’s not to like—“

“Which I should be reading right about now.” Jungkook said, not daring to hide his annoyance. “Would be great if you can just let me read in peace.”

At his words, Y/N felt a pang in her chest, hurt for being shut down and a little irritated at his rudeness.

“Um… okay.” She said and that was that. That rude encounter didn’t diminish the burning flame she had for him, however. In fact, it only encouraged her to try harder.

~~~

PRESENT

“So, I did it. I told him I felt but—“ Jen sniffed, fingers idling on the hot cup of tea Y/N had just made for her.

“I’m sorry.” Y/N said while Jen shook her head.

“It was my fault, really. I already knew he was going to say no. He had shown nothing to reciprocate my feelings. Friendly but never too much. Nice but never enough to be a sign that he could like me.”

Y/N pressed her lips together, listening.

“But I still did it. I still did it because I couldn’t live my life keeping it a secret forever. I wanted him to know. I wanted him to know he had my heart the very first day and had hoped he felt the same way. And maybe that’s when I made a mistake. I decided to give my heart without thought or reason...I just... I decided to love.”

~~~

FLASHBACK

If Satan had a brother, Jeon Jungkook might as well take that title.

As the years passed, Y/N watched Jungkook get into several fights, receive a flurry of detention slips and get reprimanded by teachers at least a few times every day for not wearing his uniform right or failing to submit an assignment on time. There was even a time when he got called by the principal for being caught smoking within school grounds—one Y/N had noticed earlier that morning when she smelled smoke the moment he passed her in the hall. He even traded his skateboard for a motorcycle, now. One that definitely looked like it can take you to hell.

Jeon Jungkook came from being the quiet kid at the back of the class to the feared rebel who bullies younger students. He even formed his own gang—a bunch of delinquents he often hung out with in town. There was a Park Jimin whose known for being a notorious street fighter; a Min Yoongi who’s rumored to be the son of the owner of an underground gambling hub in Seoul and a Jung Hoseok, who everyone says has been in jail a few times due to his stealing habits.

Despite his bad reputation, Y/N still felt for him and she couldn’t understand why her heart decided to set its mark on a boy who’s obviously bad for her, who’s obviously going to break her heart in the end. But she figured, the heart wants what it wants.

“Y/N focus. You’re staring again.” Taehyung reminded as he tapped the text book in front of her with the rear end of his pencil. They were currently studying for finals and Taehyung (a.k.a the smartest student in their year) had volunteered to help her with her Math.

“I was not.” She grumbled as she returned to her solving the sample math problem he had given her.

“You so where.” Taehyung teased, glancing up briefly at the table to their left before adding, “What do you even see in that guy?”

Y/N had admitted to her best friend her long-time crush on the school’s notorious bad boy. The funny part was, Taehyung barely reacted when she told him, reasoning that she wasn’t the subtlest person out there.

Looking at it from a spectator’s point of view, it’s absurd that she would even want to be with the likes of Jungkook when her ‘crew’ involved valedictorians and class presidents, and her grades never really went lower than a B, but she figured feelings were uncontrollable little suckers, and there’s just something about Jungkook that makes her feel alive.

“Plenty. He’s pretty hot. Have you seen his biceps?” She grinned and Taehyung made a disgusted face at her.

“Is that it? You like him because of his biceps?”

“No, he has nice eyes too.”

“How would you even know? He always has his hood on!”

Y/N licked her lips, thinking how she knows because Jungkook often sat on her table at the library to read, even when they rarely spoke. And if they did talk to each other, it would be him trying to shut her up.

“I just know.” She mumbled.

Taehyung sighed and suddenly reached over the table to hold her hand. Y/N looked up, surprised, but didn’t question his actions when he looked so serious.

“I don’t like that you like him.” He said. “I don’t like that you like Jungkook.”

“Why not?”

“Because…” Taehyung leaned back with a huff. He looked like he was about to say something but decided against it in the end and said instead, “Because he’s a delinquent, Y/N. And I don’t want you getting involved in his problems. He’s trouble. You know that.”

Y/N blinked at his words, realizing that this was the first time Taehyung had spoken up about Jungkook. Just then, she heard a loud screeching sound of a chair being dragged against the floor and when her eyes snapped up, she saw Jungkook hastily leaving his seat and moving towards the exit. Y/N suddenly looked down and saw how Taehyung’s hand was still holding hers, thinking what it must’ve looked like to Jungkook. It was a crazy thought—not to mention, it didn’t make sense why that would affect him but Y/N pulled her hand away from Taehyung’s anyway before standing up herself.

“I have to go.”

“Wait, what? Y/N! Where are you going?!” Taehyung didn’t get the chance to stop her, however, not when she left so quickly, like she was chasing after something (or someone) very important.

Y/N rushed out of the library, eyes searching for a familiar hoodie.

Bingo! She thought when she spotted him moving towards the parking lot where his motorbike must be parked. Running after him, she panted as she tried her best to catch up to his fast, long strides.

“Jungkook!” She called once they reached the lot’s gates. Jungkook looked over his shoulder then and stopped, waiting for her to catch up. Once she was standing in front of him, Y/N let herself catch her breath from running after him.

“Can I help you?” Jungkook deadpanned.

“I... I just...” Y/N’s mind went black as those doe-shaped eyes settled on her, suddenly unsure why she had run after him in the first place.

“You’re wasting my time, Y/LN.”

Y/N blinked at the mention of her surname, not expecting he would know. “You...you know my name?”

Jungkook seemed to pause at that, and then cleared his throat. “Same class. You’re friends with the rich kid. The nerd.”

“My friend’s not a nerd.” She defended, knowing he was talking about Taehyung.

“Your boyfriend, then?” Jungkook’s eyes darkened and Y/N was speechless but didn’t get the chance to say anything as he was already turning to leave.

He just hopped onto his motorbike when she blurted: “You should know that I don’t have a boyfriend.”

Jungkook paused from putting his helmet on, placing it on his thigh as he leaned on it to give her a smug look. “What makes you think I’d care to know?”

“You don’t have to care.” She replied bravely and Jungkook leaned back, looking mildly impressed. “I just want you to know I don’t like Tae like that.”

Jungkook chuckled. “Does he know that, though? It looks to me that your ‘friend’ is as subtle as a brick through a window.”

Y/N blinked a few times, unsure if he meant what she thinks he’s trying to say. “What? He’s not—“ the motorbike’s engine roared to life, drowning out her words.

“Open your eyes, sweetheart. It’ll be good for you.” He winked before revving up the bike and accelerating, leaving her in dust and smoke. Once he was out of sight, Y/N stomped her feet and growled in frustration.

“I don’t like him like that!” She yelled at him, even though she knows he’s already long gone. As she left the parking lot in annoyance, she didn’t know that a set of eyes with glasses watched their whole exchange from a corner, heart breaking into a tiny million pieces.

~~~

Love is a risk. That’s what Y/N told herself as she fidgeted with the box in her hands—a small box holding the best cupcake she ever made. On top of it was an envelope holding her most precious feelings for a certain someone, laid out in the most thoughtful and beautiful words.

Y/N knew she and Jungkook developed in the past year. They weren’t friends, but definitely considers herself an acquaintance of his with how the boy always sits with her at the library (and doesn’t snap at her to shut up anymore). There was even a time when he helped her with her Math homework. Well, it was more like him taking her assignment paper and answering everything (correctly, she might add) before handing it over with a roll of his eyes; telling her that she’s been struggling for more than an hour already and it was hurting his head seeing her thinking so hard over a very simple equation. She even made him smile once—thought it may have been a grimace, and noticed how he would acknowledge her with a nod when they pass by in the hallways. With those improvements, Y/N decided it was time to take it up a notch.

On Valentine’s Day, Y/N decided to confess her feelings to Jungkook. Despite being known as the campus bad boy, Jungkook had an army of admirers so Y/N expected that he would be receiving a lot of gifts that day. How will she stand out?

But even though she’s competing with several girl scouts, she knew all of them didn’t have the guts to actually come up and talk to him and Y/N will use that advantage to confess her feelings to him at the lot just before he leaves.

After school, Y/N couldn’t help but feel nervous as she walked towards the parking lot and waited by a corner until her target appeared. Soon enough, Jungkook strolled through the gates, twirling his keys on his finger while whistling a tune. Y/N took her chance, then.

“Jungkook.” She called, stopping the man from walking and whistling. “Hi.”

“Uh, hi.” He simply answered, looking genuinely surprised. “Can I help you?”

“Oh uh. I just...I’m sorry. I was just wondering if I can talk to you for a sec?”

Jungkook regarded her with a long look before eventually shrugging and facing her fully. Y/N took that as a yes and inhaled deeply before reaching into her bag for the box and letter. Jungkook looked curious at first but upon recognizing the gifts, his expression turned to surprised and maybe, a little unbelieving.

“Jungkook. I...I’ve known you since freshman year and the very first day I saw you, I already knew you were someone special.” Jungkook remained silent, and Y/N took it as a cue to continue.

“I know we barely know each other but I...I think my heart knows well enough that I—“

“Hey, Jungkook!”

Y/N snapped up at the call and saw three guys walking towards them. She easily recognized them as Jungkook’s friends: Jimin, Yoongi and Hoseok.

“We we’re looking for you, man! You ready to hit up some chicks at the club tonight?” Hoseok wiggled his eyebrows teasingly and punches at Jungkook’s bicep.

“Oh look, I think Jungkook already has a date.” Jimin smirked as he faced Y/N. “Hey baby, what’s your name?”

Y/N stepped back a little, throwing a glance at Jungkook for help. She knows Jungkook won’t hurt her, but she’s not quite sure about his friends.

Jungkook had a blank expression on his face, however, looking like he couldn’t care less. It hurt her, but even more so when he answered, “No one.”

Y/N felt her heart break, then.

“I don’t think she’s ‘no one’, though.” Hoseok smirked, suddenly stepping up and grabbing the letter from her hands. Before Y/N could protest, he already ripped the envelope open and unfolded the paper, making her gasp. Fear gripped her heart as the boy began to read her letter out loud—her letter holding her deepest thoughts...her letter confessing her heart to Jungkook.

“No…please stop.” She cried but her pleas were to no avail.

“Awww! That’s so sweet!” Jimin snickered before looking back at her. “And I bet that box has a cupcake. Maybe we should make sure it’s just as sweet—“

“Let’s go, guys. Just leave her alone.” Yoongi spoke for the first time, surprising Y/N who looked close to tears. “We’ll be late if we don’t leave now.”

“But I’m not finished with the letter. Hear this: Jungkook, I knew from the very first day I saw you on that skateboard that you were going to be a big part of my life. My heart just—“ Hoseok cringed then laughed. “This is golden!”

Just then, a hand suddenly ripped the paper from Hoseok’s hand and when Y/N looked to her right, she’s surprised to see Taehyung by her side.

“I think we’re done here. Now you can all leave or do you want me to add more days—no, weeks to your community service in the next few months?”

The boys stood straighter at his presence, looking more intimidating than usual.

“Come on, smarty pants. We were just having fun.” Jimin joked.

“You’re harassing a student.” Taehyung countered. And if eyes could kill, his stare would have caused casualties. “That doesn’t seem like a joke. Now leave before I tell the principal.”

Hoseok and Jimin looked at each other then, grinning menacingly before cracking their knuckles.

“What are you gonna do about it, nerd?” Jimin taunted as he pushed at Taehyung’s chest.

“Gonna tell on us, huh? Maybe we should beat up that mouth of yours till you can no longer talk.” Jimin reached out and grabbed at Taehyung’s collar. Y/N was gripped with fear, not wanting her best friend to get hurt and immediately tried to pull Jimin’s fist from him.

“Please, stop.” She cried. “Please, don’t hurt him. We’ll leave!”

Y/N stared in fear when she saw the boy pulling back his arm for a punch. Before she could brace for the impact, a hand slammed down on his shoulder, stopping him. Y/N looked up with tears cascading down her cheeks and found Jungkook pulling Jimin back, but his gaze was set on her; blank and cold.

“Let’s go. They’re not worth it.”

Y/N might as well have been punched in the gut at his words and as his gang retreated, Taehyung held her wrist until they left completely; as if he expected her to run after Jungkook just left without a sorry...without a care.

“What makes you think I’d care to know?” Jungkook’s voice echoed in her ears, squeezing her heart painfully.

“Are you okay?” Taehyung finally asked once they were gone but Y/N didn’t answer.

“Y/N. What were you thinking?” He suddenly scolded, unable to help the anger he felt from seeing her with Jungkook a while ago. “Confess to Jungkook? Really? You do realize it has ‘bad idea’ written all over it? The guy had been nothing but awful to you—“

“Please leave me alone, Tae.” Y/N spoke, silencing him.

“Y/N—“

“I said leave me alone!” She snapped. “Just go, Tae!”

Taehyung pressed his lips together, breathing out through his nose before handing over her confession letter and leaving. But before he left, he said, “If you need a ride home, my driver—“

“Just go.” She said, unable to help the wobble in her voice.

With a sigh, Taehyung left. Only when he was out of earshot did Y/N let the tears fall. She raised the confession letter to her face, staining it with tears before finally ripping it apart into pieces and letting it fall to the ground, mimicking her heart that shattered into a million pieces just a while ago.

“I’m so stupid!” She cried, legs giving out and she sat there on the pavement as sobs bubbled out of her chest.

I’m so stupid, she kept telling herself. I’m so stupid to have fallen in love with you, Jeon Jungkook.

~~~

PRESENT

“What do I do now?” Jen asked. “I don’t think I can ever face him in school after what happened.”

Y/N sighed, thinking back to how she was in her exact position years ago.

“You move on.” She answered simply. “You heal. Because time itself is the only thing that could ease the pain.”

~~~

FLASHBACK

Y/N spent the remainder of her high school days avoiding Jeon Jungkook.

It was pretty easy, considering Jungkook never sought her out nor tried to apologize for the humiliation his friends caused her. There was also the fact that he just disappeared one day without a trace. There were talks that he got into jail, immigrated to the US and even got injured badly in a fight. Whatever it was, Y/N didn’t seem to care. She thought it was better that way. She wouldn’t have been able to face him after everything.

Flash forward to two years later and Y/N was a college sophomore at the state university. It was true what people say: time is your best ally when it comes to mending a broken heart, and Y/N found herself healing from her “puppy love” by immersing herself in her course work and focusing on making her dreams come true. She wanted to become a professional chef and took up culinary arts in the hopes of being able to put up her own restaurant someday.

She and Taehyung remained the best of friends and studied in the same university, with the latter taking up business management in preparation for taking over their family business. Through the years, their friendship only became stronger, and Y/N wouldn’t have been able to pull through those dark days if it weren’t for her best friend who stayed by her side and helped her pull herself back up on her feet.

“I’m so done. I can’t do this anymore. I’m completely drained!” Taehyung placed his head on the text book in front of him, groaning. Y/N simply chuckled, knowing he’s only bluffing and could probably perfect the exam even if he didn’t study. He did graduate valedictorian in high school and was also now the top student in his major. Not that Y/N was surprised. Her best friend is the smartest person she knew.

“Stop being so dramatic. We all know you’re going to kill midterms.”

“Not if it kills me first.”

Y/N chuckled as she ran her hand through his hair to soothe him. “Do you wanna have dinner?”

“Sure.” Taehyung stretched his arms over his head then yawned. “Give me a sec to fix my stuff.” He added, pointing at the stack of books and piles of reviewers he had made.

“Yeah, sure. I actually need to go back to the dorm real quick to grab my wallet and jacket. Can we meet at my place?”

“I can always pay, you know?”

Y/N pretended to think about it. “Hmm… tempting. But even if I have the soon-to-be CEO of Kim Enterprises as my best friend…I think I’ll pass. Wouldn’t want to take advantage, you know?”

Taehyung chuckled. “You know I’d let you if you try.” He winked. “I’ll see you in 15?”

Y/N nodded and grabbed a couple of her books on the desk before leaving the library. That night as she walked through the dark street, she didn’t think life would throw her off course—figuratively and literally—when she crossed the street right across from her apartment building and almost got hit by a motorcycle as she was being careless when she decided to rummage through her bag for her keys while crossing. Luckily, the driver was fast to act and stopped his bike, but Y/N was still caught off guard and ended up throwing herself to the side; her books scattering to the ground as she fell.

“Ow.” She winced as she inspected the skin right above her elbow and found a small gash caused by her grazing it on the pavement.

“Miss, are you okay?”

Black boots crunched against the pavement and as Y/N looked up to see the biker, her world seemed to stop.

He was donned in a black jacket over a white shirt with dark jeans and combat boots. She sat there, dumbfounded, and it felt like time slowed for a brief moment with biker boy taking center stage as if an imaginary spotlight had settled over his form...

Talk about history repeating itself.

“Y—Y/N?”

Y/N swallowed hard at the sound of her name from his lips, tasting the bittersweet taste of yesterday.

“Jungkook.”

To be Continued

Hey dears~ I’M BACK! Come scream at me if you want more. keke~

Of course I wouldn’t let this masterpiece pass without writing a scenario based from it. Sorry I haven’t been here much...I’m currently editing and writing a book. I have a book release early next year which I’m so excited to share with you guys. 

To those who bought my latest book, Falling, Falling, THANK YOU! It’s still available in stores here in the Philippines. For international orders, US and Singapore orders are ongoing. The deadline for US orders has been extended! So place in your orders today! Here are the forms: 

Singapore GO

US GO

Anyways, what do you guys think? And can we talk about Jungkook’s english in this song? *heart eyes* 

- Kaye Allen

PS: Since this story is inspired by a song, it’ll be part of my Love Song Series. <3

LSS Playlist; mobile

[lesbian-sora]

Only Fools

Summary ~ School is hard. School is harder when you’re a loser who has more bullies than friends. School is even harder when you have a crush on the most amazing guy in the world, even if your friends can’t see it. School is damn impossible when your friends coerce you into participating in the school play with the most amazing guy in the world. 

Dan and Phil’s experience falls into the impossible category, but maybe together (with some help from the King himself) they can make it out alive and well.

Tags ~ Fluff, high school AU, friends to lovers, theatre kids, mutual pining, slow burn, slight angst, not actually unrequited love

Words ~ 7106/~35K

Warnings ~ Swearing

Rating ~ Teen

Author’s Note ~ Hi guys! This fic was originally supposed to be one of my fics for Phandom Big Bang 2016, but things came up. I recently blew the dust off of it, and I really liked it, so it’s getting revamped and published! Updates will most likely be once a month for the next 4 months (I may up that posting schedule if writing/editing goes well and people actually like it) and I look forward to all of you getting to read it! Also, this will be my first chaptered fic that I’m posting one part at a time, so that’s exciting!

Prompt me!

Buy me a coffee!

Next chapter!

Read on AO3

                                                     Act I Scene I

There honestly weren’t very many people Louise Pentland disliked. She was bubbly and personable, meaning she got along with just about everyone she came in contact with, and she quite liked it that way. Everything from her approachable smile to her mothering attitude made it so people were drawn to her and she to them.

That being said, she absolutely despised Phil Lester.

Was it unfair, petty, and totally unreasonable? Absolutely. In all honesty, Phil would probably be voted nicest guy in the school, if anyone were to take a poll. Was he was a bit weird? Most certainly.  However, it was a completely harmless weird. It was quirky and odd like that store on the edge of town that dealt solely in the manufacture and sale of cat-themed gnomes. If she were to be straight with herself, she would admit that Phil had never knowingly or unknowingly harmed, damaged or even seriously upset herself or anyone she remotely knew, simply because that wasn’t the type of person Phil was. No, her dislike of Phil wasn’t his fault, and he had no idea it was even happening. Her dislike boiled down to one thing and one thing only.

“Louise! You’ll never guess what Phil did today!” Dan gushed, collapsing in the seat next to her.

Louise didn’t bother to look up from her compact where she was very carefully reapplying her lip gloss. She knew Dan was flushed lightly with a wide, dopey smile and that his eyes shone as if every star was compacted down into glitter that was dumped into hot chocolate. He always looked like that when Phil was brought up. Which was a lot. “I’m guessing from your normal reports that he was walking down the hall and breathing.”

“No,” Dan scowled and wadded a bit of paper into a tiny ball and flicked it at her, offering a sheepish grin after it landed in her makeup. “I actually talked with him a bit today.”

“Dan, we’ve discussed this before. Saying ‘Hi, Phil!’ and then hiding your face and running away before he can respond doesn’t count as talking to him.”

“Someone’s in a mood,” Dan pouted. “And I’ll have you know this was a totally real and legit conversation we had. Some dick head knocked into me on the way out here and Phil saw and helped me pick all my stuff up and everything. He even gave me his hand to help me stand up!”

Louise cocked a brow. “Really? Honestly, Dan I almost didn’t think you had it in you,” she said, ignoring his squawks of protest. “What all did you boys talk about?”

“He saw my piano book and asked if I played,” Dan said dreamily, the look on his face making it more than apparent that he was reliving the moment in perfect clarity again and again until it was ingrained in his memory. “And so I told him yeah, but I was awful and then I thought he was going to just leave but he walked with me almost the whole way here and he saw me in the play last year, Louise! He saw me and remembered me and told me I did a good job! Oh my god, it was probably the best moment of my life.”

Louise rolled her eyes, but smiled good naturedly, more than pleased over how happy her friend was. However, there was one thing that always bugged her about the whole situation. “Dan, darling, why Phil of all people? I mean he’s nice and all, and, sure, he’s not awful to look at, but he’s just so strange. Saying you could do better is probably the understatement of the year.”

Dan looked at her, glaring at her as if she’d just spat in his mother’s face and told her that her cooking was a disgrace (which she hadn’t) and he was personally offended (which he probably was). “Okay, first of all,” he started and Louise took a deep breath, already regretting her words and preparing for the sermon that was soon to follow. “Phil Lester is an unusual beauty so rare and perfect and we don’t deserve him. Second, he’s got an absolutely brilliant mind and we should all count ourselves lucky to hear anything that brain decides to gift us with. Third-”

“Mr. Howell,” Mrs. Bronwell interrupted from the front of the room, “as much as I’m sure we’d all love to hear you expound on the virtues of Mr. Lester, I, personally, get paid to teach you math, and I’d quite like to do so at this moment. If that’s not an imposition on you, of course.”

Dan blushed bright red all the way from his collar bones (and possibly farther, who knew) to the very tips of his ears. “Sorry, Mrs.,” he said, sinking down a bit more in his chair. “I’m done.”

“Oh, I highly doubt that,” Louise scoffed, quite unintentionally. There were a few scattered titters around the room and Dan gave Louise a long, hard, stare. The whole school probably knew about Dan’s crush on Phil just from him talking loudly and passionately about how wonderful the other boy was at any chance he got, so it’s not like there was any new gossip being delivered so he didn’t really feel the need to be properly embarrassed. But, the sting of betrayal was still there and he was sure to let her know he felt about it.

“Thank you for your contribution, Miss Pentland,” Mrs, Bronwell smiled, “but we really must get on with our lesson. Now, today we’re studying logarithms - James, don’t you roll your eyes at me. Yes, I saw you just fine.”

Now that the lesson had begun and he was finally free of all judgement, Dan let himself drift off quite happily into his thoughts, where his daydreams once again found themselves centered upon the subject of Phil Lester. How kind his smile was when he was offering him help. How he seemed genuinely interested as Dan flushed and fumbled over the explanation of his mediocre piano skills. How his hand was so soft but sure and he held Dan’s own and pulled him to his feet. As his teacher went on about the ins and outs of math things he didn’t care about Dan drew little doodles, of hearts and Phil coming to rescue him from the horrors of sports. He sighed happily and looked out the window thinking about Phil Lester, unknowing that somewhere in the school Phil was sighing happily and looking out a window thinking about Dan Howell.

                                                     Act I Scene II

“I found out he plays piano, Peej!” Phil beamed, waving his hands around for emphasis. “That’s so impressive, honestly. I wonder if he can play anything else.”

“I think I heard somewhere that he plays drums, but that could just be a rumor.” PJ paid the conversation little mind, far more focused on the poster he was designing for the school play.

“Eh, he seems the type,” Chris added helpfully. “You know: loud, obnoxious and in your face.”

Phil scowled at his now snickering friends. “He is not. He’s always really sweet and quiet when I talk to him.”

“Yeah?” Chris challenged. “Well, I had a history class with him one time and his own friend asked the teacher if he could change seats because Dan was distracting him too much.”

“Sean said that one time when they were taking a chemistry exam Dan started singing the periodic table. Out loud,” PJ added helpfully.

“He’s boisterous, maybe,” Phil conceded, “But he’s probably hilarious which is why his friend was so distracted and besides, learning a song to memorize the periodic table is pretty smart.”

Chris rolled his eyes. “Mate, we could tell you that Dan killed Mother Theresa and you’d just say ‘I mean, she probably deserved it.’” PJ chuckled next to him and Phil simply shot him another dirty look. “Anyway, as much as you love talking about Dan we really ought to move on because me and Peej, well, we don’t enjoy it near as much as you.”

Before Phil could argue PJ chimed in with a, “Help me decide on which one of these posters is better. Mr. Walters wants them up by this afternoon so people have plenty of time to sign up before auditions next month.” He showed them a couple of hand drawn posters, one featuring a more 60’s theme with psychedelic rainbow patterns and little people scattered all around doing various theatre things whilst the other  was more focused on space, complete with little aliens all over it. Both said in clear letters “Join this year’s spring musical! All You Need Is Love: A 60’s space drama written and produced by PJ Liguori and Sophie Newton. Auditions after school in the auditorium on 8/8”

“I like the space one,” Phil said.

“No, no. The 60’s is way better,” Chris argued. “It’s more fun looking and approachable. Everybody likes the 60’s.”

“No, everybody likes space,” Phil insisted.

“No, you like space, you big nerd.”

“I think we should ask the cards.”

“Phil,” PJ groaned, “you can’t rely on your tarot cards for every decision you have to make.”

“Yes, I can. I asked the cards and they said it was fine,” Phil smirked, pulling out his deck of Pokemon cards. He was honestly rather proud of them; he had spent an entire afternoon dedicated to learning each of the 56 cards in the full tarot deck and assigning a Pokemon to each one, then an entire month (and more money than he’d care to admit) collecting every single card until his deck was finally complete. He closed his eyes and focused. “Alright, we’re just doing a yes or no question so we can just use the Major Arcana, or would you rather do a full reading with all the cards?”

PJ rolled his eyes, but said, “Just the Major is fine. You can do a full reading when it’s more important decisions.”

Phil nodded, separating out the twenty two cards needed. “Okay, PJ, I’m going to start shuffling. Focus really hard on your question and when you think it’s time, tell me to stop.”

PJ closed his eyes for a moment, breathing deeply and said, “Stop.”

Immediately, Phil quit shuffling and laid the cards out in a neat row. “Is this good, or do you want me to shuffle again?”

“That’s fine. My question is ‘Should I use the space themed poster?’”

“Alright, choose a card.”

PJ chose one fourth from the left and Phil flipped it over, revealing a card of Mew. Phil grinned, before announcing: “You got The World, which talks about your conscious and unconscious joining and how you’re facing an important juncture that will make your path for the future clear. It also means that you’re going to gain true insight to the nature of yourself.”

“Yeah, yeah, but is it a yes or a no?” Chris said impatiently.

“It’s a yes,” Phil said with a smug smirk.

“And how do we know you’re not bullshitting us to get your way?”

“Well, if you think about it there was the whole conscious, unconscious thing, and he clearly preferred the space one, considering how much time he spent on it.” They looked at PJ for confirmation who shrugged and nodded with a sheepish grin. “Plus if you have the play be ‘you’, having this decision be insight into the true nature of yourself makes sense since it’s really more about space with a sixties flair than sixties with space themes.” Chris frowned thoughtfully, slowly nodding his head before Phil grinned and added, “Also, you don’t.”

“Why you absolute-”

“Stow it,” PJ hissed. “Mr. Bedsole just walked in.” And with that, the three quieted down to focus on the droning lecture about World War II.

                                                    Act I Scene III

“But you said we were going out for coffee today!” Dan pouted at Louise, who, in her defense, looked absolutely heartbroken denying him.

“I’m sorry, Dan,” she said. “I really am, but Chummy says there’s a huge sale going on in Brighton today and I really don’t want to miss it. I promise we can go tomorrow.”

“I do swear that it’s a one day sale,” Zoe added earnestly, looking almost as remorseful as Louise. “I’ll buy you a drink tomorrow to make up for it.”

“That’s all well and good for tomorrow, but what am I meant to do for today?” he whined.

“You could always come with us?” Louise suggested weakly. “We can get coffee at the station to have on the train?”

Dan sighed, quietly enough that the two girls didn’t hear . “As much as I do honestly enjoy going shopping with you two, I’m really not up for a two hour train ride today. However, if you see anything you think I’d like, I wouldn’t say no to some more peace offerings for bailing on me today.”

“You cheeky thing!” Zoe laughed, gently pinching his cheek. “You’re a right mess and a half, you are.”

He batted her hand away with a smile. “Yeah, yeah. Seriously, though. What am I going to do today? My mum's going to be out until five or later and I left my key at home. Do you want me to just wander around Reading lost and alone that whole time?”

“Oh, please,” Louise laughed with an eye roll. “Tyler exists, so you know there’s no way you can be bored for too long.”

“My ears are on fire right now,” Tyler sang, joining them at their table. “What are we talking about? Besides me, of course.”

“Well, someone ditched me to go look at- What is it exactly that you’re after?”

“Clothes,” both girls said in unison.

“Going to that Brighton sale?” Tyler asked with a knowing smirk. “I’d join you, but honestly, I don’t want to.”

They all laughed together before Dan piped up, “Anyway, they’re leaving me for clothes and have put my afternoon activities in your command.”

Tyler winced. “I’m sorry, Dan-”

“No!”

“I have a date!” Tyler defended. “And, boo, you know I think you’re the best thing since sliced bread, but you third wheeling me isn’t going to get me laid.”

Dan cast him a betrayed look. “So, basically what you’re telling me is I’m basically screwed? Carrie’s busy with theatre, you’re going on a date, these two would rather pet garments they can’t afford then get coffee with me, and Sean is probably off sucking face with Signe.”

“You could always just follow Phil home and sit outside like a lost puppy and hope he lets you in,” Tyler suggested, somewhat helpfully.

“Why don’t you actually fuck off?” Dan snapped,as his face turned scarlet. “That was one time, okay?”

“You stood outside his house in the rain for an hour pretending you thought it was someone else’s house before you realized nobody was home.”

“That was two years ago!”

“I still can’t believe it happened at all.”

Dan buried his face in his hands to hide his blushing cheeks. “You guys are the absolute worst people in the world and I hate every single one of you,” he groaned.

Tyler reached over and patted his cheek fondly. “Oh, boo, we know that’s not true. Who else would listen to you wax poetic about Phil?”

Again the three laughed together. “I’m still without anything to do this afternoon,” Dan pointed out.

“Can’t you just break in?” Tyler suggested. “I do that at my house all the time.”

“My mom routinely locks all the windows so mine is the only one open and there’s no way I can get to the second floor.”

“You could hang out with Sean and Signe,” Louise offered. “I’m sure they’d at least try to contain themselves while you’re around.”

“Yeah, but even when they’re not trying to climb into each other’s mouth I still always feel like I’m third wheeling so fucking hard. And not like tricycle third wheel either.”

“Why don’t you just go hang out at the coffee house on your own or go nerd shopping?” Zoe recommended. “You have your phone and headphones, right? Just sit in a corner and ignore everyone.”

Dan let out a long suffering sigh. “I guess that’s my only option, unless I want to go to the library or something.” He sighed and complained, “Why is there nothing to do here?”

“There’s plenty to do, you’re just too immersed in your laptop to experience any of them,” Louise laughed. “Chummy and I can always find plenty to do.”

“You have no idea what a town with nothing to do looks like, sweetheart,” Tyler scoffed. “Jackson was like a third this size and a good hour away from anything even remotely interesting.”

“Yeah, well, this place being better than your hometown is zero help right now. Somebody give me something to do.”

“You could just Google it and do the tourist-y things that pop up,” Zoe beamed. “Me and Alfie did that one time and it was loads of fun.”

“That sounds like a really great date,” Dan agreed, a dash of sarcasm in his tone. “However, since I’m a sexually ambiguous nerd who can’t properly talk to anyone outside of you guys, there’s very little chance of me getting a date any time soon. Plus it’s pouring and I wouldn’t want to wander around Reading in the rain even if I had a date.” Tyler took this moment to mutter about how he’d done it for Phil before, but quieted down when Dan gave him a stern glance.

“Well, whatever you decide to do, I wish you luck,” Louise said, taking out her phone to check the time. “However, Chummy and I must be getting on as our train leaves in less than an hour.”

“Bye, Louise. Bye Zoe,” Dan and Tyler chimed together. The two girls laughed and gave their final farewell hugs before leaving, leaving Dan and Tyler alone.

“So, who is this guy, anyway?” Dan asked, picking at his fingernails.

“Uh, his name is Michael and I met him on Tinder.”

“Phil’s middle name-”

“Is Michael. Yes, I know,” Tyler teased. “You’ve told us all more than once.”

Dan merely rolled his eyes and said, “So, Michael. Is this a guy you might actually like to date or is he just a casual hookup?”

“I don’t know, honestly,” Tyler shrugged. “He seemed nice enough while we were messaging but not exactly my kind of guy, you know? I may just keep in contact with him to hang out with on Fridays when I’m bored because somebody is too invested in Mario Kart to go party with me.”

“Please. You and I both know that I’m probably the last person you’d want to go with you to a party. I’d just stand awkwardly in a corner playing on my phone all night and making everyone who dared to talk to me feel bad because they wouldn’t understand a single word I mumbled.”

Tyler cast him yet another sympathetic look and Dan swore he was going to rip his eyebrows out if another person looked at him as if he was the dog they were leaving behind at the shelter. “Have you considered hanging out with Carrie this afternoon? Like, I know you said you weren’t doing theatre this year-”

“The four hours I spent locked in a janitor’s closet for being in the school play said I wasn’t doing theatre this year.”

Tyler narrowed his eyes at the interruption, but continued. “Anyway, you said you weren’t going to be in the play, but I’m pretty sure they’re just doing like pre-pre-pre-play stuff today. Hanging up posters and the like. I mean, it’s something at least.”

Dan considered his options for a moment. While he had sworn off acting for the year, he really liked most of the theatre kids he hung out with last time. Besides, it was completely harmless and he did always enjoy spending time with Carrie. “Yeah, I suppose. Anyway, if it is horrible I can always pretend my grandma is in the hospital or something to get out of it.”

“That’s the Dan Howell spirit we all know and love,” Tyler grinned, clapping him on the back.

This will be fine. What could go wrong?

                                                    Act I Scene IV

There was no way this was happening.

“PJ, I can’t go in there,” Phil hissed, physically keeping his friend by his side and out of that room. For in that room sat none other than Dan Howell, looking perfect as always whilst he lounged next to Carrie, who was laughing along at something he said. “I thought you said he wouldn’t be here today!”

PJ shrugged, clearly not seeing the problem and Phil had never felt so betrayed. “He said he wasn’t coming back last year, but maybe he changed his mind. Or maybe he’s just helping a friend hang posters. Who knows? You might if you go in there and talk to him.”

“I can’t let him see me like this,” Phil refused. “I took out my contacts last lesson because my eyes were all itchy and the redness still hasn’t gone down and I look terrible.”

“Maybe he’s into the whole robot look.”

“You’re not helping!”

“Look, mate,” PJ sighed. “You can stay and help or you can go home and sulk, but either way I’ve got to be in there to take charge of this whole shindig and I can already feel Sophie glaring at me for being late. I know you don’t look one hundred percent your best ever but it’s a Monday afternoon after school and nobody looks great, and I swear to god if you tell me Dan looks amazing I will never let you borrow my Legend of Zelda games ever again.” Phil gave him a sheepish grin. “And for what it’s worth your face shape works really well with those glasses and the redness is pretty much gone.”

Phil smiled softly at his friend. “You always know what to say, Peej.”

PJ smirked and winked back at him. “It truly is a gift. Now come on, let’s go hang some posters and get some theatre nerds hyped about a play.”

As the two walked in a kind of hush fell over the gathered students and Phil couldn’t help but notice the panicked look Dan gave Carrie as he passed by them, taking a seat next to Chris and Alexandra. He leaned over to point it out to Chris, but he merely shot him a look before pointedly focusing on PJ and Sophie at the front of the room. Phil huffed; he knew why he was being shushed, but that didn’t mean he had to like it.

“Okay, everyone, thanks for being here!” PJ beamed at the eight students sprawled across various chairs and desks. “We really appreciate your help. Does anyone have any questions?”

“Why don’t you tell them what exactly it is that they’re helping with?” Sophie suggested from behind him with a smile and a fond roll of the eyes.

PJ gave her a crooked grin in thanks before returning his attention to the crowd. “Right, I should. Well, as you all should know the school puts on a musical every spring, and if you didn’t know then you do now. Anyway, as this is our last year Mr. Walters has agreed to put on a play that Sophie and I wrote, and he’s put us in charge of everything from production to advertisement. Today we’re putting up posters around the school to let everyone know about the auditions that are happening next month, giving them plenty of time to pluck up the courage to sign up since that’s probably the hardest part of school plays for a lot of us.” There were a few scattered chuckles, and PJ carried on. “Since there are ten of us and five main areas we need to put these up, we’re going to be splitting into teams of two, and each team is going to get twenty posters to hang up. Yeah, it sounds like a lot, but we want these everywhere. I don’t want there to be a single person at this school who doesn’t know about this play. That means staple them to bulletin boards, hang them up on those weird clothes pin things outside the art room, tape them on every door and stairwell you can find. So yeah, I mean it when I say everywhere.”

“Alright then,” Sophie chimed in. “After that rousing speech, everyone pick a partner and we’ll arm you with a stapler, tape, clothespins, blu tack and more posters than you’ll know what to do with. Go!” Phil swore he saw PJ, Carrie, and Chris all share a look, but he brushed it off to partner up with Chris, only to find that he had already linked arms with Alexandra. He glanced around the room to see that PJ and Sophie were obviously in each other's pockets, Carrie was chatting with Matt, and Tom and Gi were leaned against one another playing some kind of app on Tom’s phone leaving-

“Uh, hi again?”

Phil whipped his head around to see Dan standing in front of him with a bit of red tinting his ears. “Your friend abandon you, too?” Phil chuckled. When Dan didn’t answer and just continued blinking at him, Phil flushed bright red immediately starting to back track. “Not that I’m saying- Well, what I mean is more that- You see what I’m trying to say is-” he finally sputtered to a stop. “Sorry?”

Dan blinked at him a couple more times before realization dawned on his face and he blushed to match Phil. “No, no it’s fine, I promise! I’m not offended or anything! Carrie did totally ditch me to partner with Matt. I was just really distracted by your glasses; I didn’t know you wore them.”

Phil chuckled nervously, scratching behind his neck. “Yeah, they’re- yeah. They’re kinda big and dumb looking so I try not to wear them at school too much.”

“It’s not that,” Dan mumbled, looking down and to the left while shooting Phil looks from beneath his lashes. “They actually really suit you. They make you look really smart I guess.” He flushed a bit darker before adding, “I like them.”

Well, if Phil wasn’t about to pass out before from how adorable and shy Dan looked he definitely was now. Dan liked his glasses. Dan Howell liked his glasses. He took a moment to gather himself before he could blurt out that he was about to call the optometrist and tell her to cancel all his contact orders from now until forever because Dan Howell liked his glasses. “Thanks, that means a lot,” he said instead. “I don’t really like them all that much so they can use all the love they can get from other people.”

Dan sputtered out an abrasive laugh which garnered a couple people’s attention and made Phil’s chest feel like it had been filled with warm helium before Dan slapped his hands over his mouth to muffle it. Phil considered telling Dan his hands would would better suited in Phil’s instead of quieting the music that was his laugh, but decided that was maybe a little forward. “If you don’t mind me asking, why are you wearing your glasses if you hate them so much?”

“Oh, sometimes my contacts can bother my eyes and last period they were really itchy and so I took them out instead of trying to rub my eyeballs into the back of my skull.”

Phil mentally slapped himself for actually saying that out loud, but Dan just giggled. “Well, I hope they’re feeling better. I noticed you had some red in your eyes, so I’m glad it’s nothing serious.”

At the mention of red Phil slammed his eyes shut and covered them with his hands. “PJ said the red was all gone!” he whined.

Dan immediately started flapping his hands nervously. “No, no it’s fine! It’s hardly noticeable at all! I only noticed because I was staring at your face up close, and oh my god, I can’t believe I said that out loud. Someone please stop me.” By the end of his sentence Dan was a darker red than Phil previously thought possible and looked  just about ready for the world to split in half and swallow him whole. He was adorable, and Phil was about to die.

“Nah, I get it,” Phil chuckled with a smile. “You said the glasses were distracting so it makes sense for you to stare.”

Dan opened his mouth like he was about to argue Phil’s point, but there was a cough behind Phil and they both turned to see PJ standing there with a stack of flyers in his hands and a knowing smirk on his lips. “Well, since the two of you were too busy - um, let’s say talking - to come up and pick an area to work in the only one left is the gym and lunchroom, so I hope the two of you brought umbrellas.” Dan looked absolutely panic stricken at the thought of needing an umbrella, much to Phil’s confusion, but PJ simply carried on. “Sophie has the stuff to hang these up with so you two need to get going or we’re still going to be here when school lets in tomorrow.”

Phil groaned melodramatically and accused PJ of forsaking him and throwing him to the depths of hell, but still smiled and thanked Sophie - who was giggling behind her hands - when he got their tools. The only problem was that Dan was strangely quiet the entire time, and not in the adorably shy way he was earlier that afternoon when they were walking to class together. No, this was more akin to the silence of a man being lead to the gallows, and that just wasn’t going to work in Phil’s book. “Hey, are you okay?”

Dan gnawed his bottom lip for a moment before sighing and saying, “I’m really not sure if I want to tell you. Like on one hand it’s really not that big of a deal, and avoiding it is only going to make it way worse, but on the other hand it’s really embarrassing, and I don’t like talking about it.”

Phil hummed in thought, tapping his chin and looking Dan up and down through squinted eyes. To most it might look like he was just observing the younger boy to come up with some sort of plan, but in reality he was just taking the opportunity to check him out. “What if I hum and then you say it really quickly and if I hear you, I can pretend I didn’t understand and if I didn’t hear you then you at least got it off your chest and you don’t have to worry anymore.”

Dan laughed and smiled so hard his eyes were almost completely closed. “You are such a strange person, Phil Lester,” he said with what Phil was adamantly interpreting as fondness.

“You know, you’re actually not the first person to tell me that.”

Dan rolled his eyes but he still had that grin so Phil didn’t take it to heart. “Unfortunately, that plan won’t work, so I’m just going to tell you, but you can’t make fun of me, okay?” Phil nodded eagerly, knowing that there was no way he could ever deliberately make Dan feel bad about himself. Dan took a deep breath and quickly said, “MyhairisnaturallyreallycurlysoIstraightenitbutwhenitgetswetitgetscurlyagainandit’srainingandIdidn’tbringanything.”

Phil blinked, trying to process what he just heard until it finally clicked and he beamed. “Why didn’t you say so?! You can borrow my coat.”

Dan’s eyes bugged out at the very idea. “I can’t just take your coat! What are you going to wear? It may be a short walk, but you’ll still wind up soaked by the time we get inside.”

Phil shrugged. “Well, any way you look at it, one of us is going to look like a drowned rat by the end of this no matter what. You seem to be a lot more worried about it than me, so why shouldn’t you be the one to stay dry? Besides, I have a change of clothes in my bag since I’m meeting up with my family for dinner after this. Take the coat, Dan.”

“But Phil-”

“Too late!” he sang, pulling his arm out of the sleeve. “I’m  taking it off and I’m not going to put it back on until it’s time to leave. If you don’t take it then the poor coat will just sit here and be useless while we both get wet. Do you want my coat to feel that way, Dan?”

Dan giggled at his overreaction, but took the coat with a gentle smile. “Thanks, Phil. I mean it.”

“No problem,” Phil smiled back. “But now you do have to hold the flyers and stuff. Just shove them under your jacket so they don’t get wet.”

Dan nodded and took the papers. “Alright then, let’s do this.”

                                                    Act I Scene V

“Oh my god, Louise, it was amazing,” Dan gushed over the phone. He had tried texting Louise but he was way too excited and his fingers kept slipping and pretty much everything he wrote had more exclamation points than actual letters. “How do we have so much in common and I never knew it?”

“Maybe because you only ever stalked him instead of talking and sharing your interests?” she teasingly suggested.

“You can’t tell but I’m giving you a dirty look right now,” Dan pouted, tracing his finger over the numbers written on the Post-It note Phil had given him. “And there will be plenty of actual talking between the two of us now, since he gave me his number.”

Louise squealed across the line. She had never made it a secret that Phil wasn’t her first choice for Dan’s big crush, but she had to admit that the fact that Dan was so over the moon for him was precious, and anything that made Dan happy made her happy. “Oh my god, really? What happened?”

“Well, we had to go out to the gym to hang posters and since it was pouring I was complaining about my hair-”

“Like you always do.”

“Shut it. Anyway, he insisted that I used his jacket to keep dry and at the end of the day it was still raining so he told me to keep it and I could text him about returning it later,” Dan sighed happily, reliving every moment of the afternoon in perfect clarity. “Louise, it was amazing. He’s amazing.”

“Have you texted him yet?” Louise demanded. “You have to tell me everything when you do.”

“I don’t want to return his jacket yet,” Dan admitted. He hadn’t told Louise that it was warm and smelled like Phil and that was why he didn’t want to lose it but he was pretty sure she knew. “What if I text him and all he wants to talk about is getting his coat?”

Louise sighed and Dan knew she was her rolling her eyes. “You’re being ridiculous, you know that, right? Of course he doesn’t want to just talk about that. Giving someone your coat as an excuse to keep talking to someone is one of the oldest tricks in the book. I’m pretty sure it’s been a thing since coats were invented.”

“I don’t know, Louise,” Dan said, biting his thumb nail. “I mean, Phil’s just a really nice person. He was probably just giving me his coat because it was nice. He’s not really the type to play tricks like that.”

“Everyone play tricks, even if it’s subconscious,” Louise dismissed. Dan could almost see her nodding sagely. “He probably did give you the jacket because you needed it, but the phone number was just so the two of you can talk. If he really was only interested in the coat then he would have just set up a time to get it back when he gave it to you.”

“You really think so?” Dan asked nervously. “What if I make a fool of myself and he never speaks to me again?”

“Number one that won’t happen. Number two, even if it does are you really in any worse of a boat? It’s not like you were actually talking to him before this anyway.”

“You’re being super unhelpful and also the absolute worst.”

“You love it. Now text that lion loving nerd and make sure I’m your maid of honor at the wedding.”

“What do I even say?” Dan whined.

“Just introduce yourself, you complete dollop head. Just say ‘Hi, this is Dan!’”

Dan sighed dramatically, flopping back and extending out three of his long limbs. He winced when they all settled into that nice stretched feeling and quickly changed phone hands so he could do that last one as well. “Fine, I’ll do it as soon as I get off the phone with you.”

“Oh, well, in that case my mother has been calling me to come downstairs for about five minutes and I’m definitely not making this up so you have to text Phil.”

“Louise I hate you!”

“Love you, too!” she cackled, sending a couple kissing noises across the line before hanging up.

Dan groaned and glared at his phone for abandoning him, hoping that Louise would somehow be able to feel it. After a moment he sighed and pulled up messages and tapped “Compose”

To: Phil 5:44

hello! this is dan the guy u left your coat with this afternoon lol.

Dan closed the app to open YouTube, not expecting a response any time soon, but before he could finish pulling up his subscription box his phone buzzed.

From: Phil 5:47

Hi!! How was your walk home? Did you stay dry and everything? I would have given you a ride, but I was already late to meet my parents. I’m sorry. :(

Dan took a moment to breathe calmly but quickly gave up in favor of squealing in delight as he rolled back and forth, clutching his phone to his chest. He just had to tell Louise.

To: The Mum Friend 5:49

omg hes so nice. like he asked if i stayed dry on the way home and apologized for not driving me home himself  #phillesterangelconfirmed

To: Phil the Actual Angel 5:51

dw about it ^-^ i stayed pretty dry. yhanks to you i don’t look like a hobbit reject.

From: Phil the Actual Angel 5:54

Lol any Hobbit that rejects you is missing out on making their Hobbit village cuter than all the other ones. You can come join my elf city and we can be too tall together.

To: The Mum Friend 5:57

LOUISSE HE CALLERD ME CUTER IM DYING SEND HELPP

To: Phil the Actual Angel 5:58

lets be honest wed both be loners. im too tall for the hobbits and ur too clumsy for the elves.

From: Phil the Actual Angel 6:00

Why must you crush my dreams Danyul? :’< I’m not that clumsy

To: Phil the Actual Angel 2:02

i think the paint still stuck in my hair from where u knocked me into the art supplies in the prop room would beg to differ.

From: Phil the Actual Angel 2:04

Okay, I GUESS that’s a fair point. And hey, as long as we’re outcasts together that’s not too bad in my book. ^-^

To: Phil the Actual Angel 2:04

my my phillip r u flirting with me?

From: Phil the Actual Angel 2:05

That depends entirely on if it’s working :D Hey, by the way, what lunch do you have?

Dan frowned at the sudden topic change, but shook his head and went along with it for now.

To: Phil the Actual Angel 6:06

i have 2nd y?

From: Phil the Actual Angel 2:07

You do? That’s the same one I have? How come I’ve never seen you? D:

To: Phil the Actual Angel 2:08

probs because i sit with my friends and we try to avoid human interaction lol

From: Phil the Actual Angel 2:10

Same, honestly. Do you think you and your friends would want to come and eat lunch with me and mine tomorrow? We usually sit out under the tree next to the front office.

To: Phil the Actual Angel 2:11

i am so sorry can i answer you in a sec my mum wants me

Dan took a deep breath, trying not to panic. He quickly dialed up Louise and waited with bated breath as it rang again and again and again and again and ag-

“Dan? What can-”

“HE ASKED ME TO EAT LUNCH WITH HIM TOMORROW!” Dan shouted before she could finish her greeting.

“Wait, hold on a minute. Who did what now?”

“Phil! He asked me to eat lunch with him tomorrow!” he repeated in a much quieter but no calmer tone. “Well, actually he asked me to ask all of you if you might be interested in eating lunch with his group tomorrow. What should I even say to that? ‘Yes, I’d like to eat lunch with you tomorrow and every following day for the rest of our lives’?”

“You could always just say you’ll ask,” she said with an underlying laugh. “I don’t see a problem with us sitting with them, though. All of us like meeting new people so it should be fun.”

“You mean it? Everything will be fine?”

“I’m sure of it, and if anyone says otherwise, I’ll wallop them on the head.”

“You’re the best, Louise.”

“I know it. Now go set up your lunch date already.” And with that the line clicked dead and Dan was once again left alone with his phone.

To: Phil the Actual Angel 5:14

sorry! my mum is v demanding sometimes T_T but yeah lunch tomorrow sounds great! all my friends like meeting new people so it should be lots of fun

From: Phil the Actual Angel 5:16

Don’t worry about it! ^-^ So you want to just meet at the tree or in the lunchroom or what?

To: Phil the Actual Angel 5:18

i think we can find our way to the tree so that should be fine ^-^ see u tomorrow!

From: Phil the Actual Angel 5:20

It’s a date!

Dan gaped at his phone for a moment before calling Louise yet again to scream.

[syncogon]

[QZGS Fic] The Kill-Stealing Prodigy

part 1 of my Summer Days of Blue Rain project! 

this scene is entirely ORIGINAL/FANFIC, not a translation. (i will specify at the beginning of each part if it’s based off of the prequel)

if you haven’t already, please read “part 0” describing wei chen and huang shaotian’s first meeting; it’s good background info for this.

please like/reblog/comment with feedback and suggestions! i’m always trying to improve!

"Blue Brook Guild, this isn't the last you've seen of me!" It had been a cheesy thing to say, suited to be uttered by the incompetent villain of a children's cartoon. Huang Shaotian's mouth outputted words faster than his brain could process them, so a lot of what came out ended up being nonsense. That's just the way he was.

In this case, though, that simple declaration, uttered the first time Blue Brook had killed him for trying to kill-steal one of their BOSSes, turned out to be surprisingly prophetic.

Of course, Team Blue Rain and Blue Brook Guild were separate entities, and as a mere member of Blue Rain's training camp, Huang Shaotian didn't have much reason to interact with the guild. But still, here he was, training to hopefully become a full-fledged member of the Glory professional team. No longer would he be competing with Blue Brook for a BOSS kill; instead he'd be relying on Blue Brook to get BOSS kills, and succeed in all its other endeavors. It was certainly a shift in perspective, after spending so much time strategizing how to thwart this large guild.

The biggest change came from having to think of his biggest enemy, the sneaky Blue Brook guild leader who was unashamed of using cheap tactics and ganging up on a lone player with a group of a hundred, as his new superior. These were two very different identities, and the issue was further complicated by Huang Shaotian's general contempt for being told what to do. Wei Chen was a relaxed leader, fortunately, and didn't blink at Huang Shaotian's frequent bouts of disrespect and overall disregard for authority.

But now that they weren't constantly fighting each other, Huang Shaotian discovered that he actually quite liked Old Wei's playstyle. Not that he'd ever admit it to the guy's face, of course, but there was something immensely satisfying in watching him set traps for his opponents. Huang Shaotian had no interest in playing a slow-paced role like that himself – he much preferred the quick, purely damage-based Blade Master, thank you very much – but teaming up with a Warlock seemed like great fun. Even just watching these matches, Huang Shaotian loved searching for the potential opportunities where he, an outside party, could dart in, strike, and dart out before the opponent even had a chance to blink.

It was all the thrill of kill-stealing bosses, without the moral drawbacks. It was addicting. Glory was addicting, and he loved every second of it. He'd play it every second if it were allowed here – hm, were the computers locked at night? Maybe he should try sneaking some extra playtime in while everyone was sleeping…

Well, overall at least, training camp was pretty great. What better way to spend your days than doing something you loved? Old Wei had offered, and he'd jumped at the opportunity, throwing away his studies with hardly a second thought – he was never really cut out for school anyway, nothing moved quickly enough for his interest.

The only drawback – or, well, the main one at least, was that he couldn't spend all his time just playing Glory. As a trainee, he had a strict schedule and various other responsibilities and assignments and whatnot that interrupted his play.

For example, right now – every morning began the same way, with one of the training camp leaders briefing them on their goals for the day, what the schedule looked like, expectations, assignments, yada yada yada. It was only five minutes, true, but it felt like hours, sitting there and fidgeting, wishing he could get his fingers on a keyboard and mouse.

The training leader droned on – and people said he talked too much, Huang Shaotian thought with a barely suppressed groan. At least things were interesting when it was Old Wei speaking to them. The captain was much more open to heckling from the audience, a fact of which Huang Shaotian took gleeful advantage, which then often led into verbal sparring matches that were highly amusing to audience and participants alike.

Alas, today it was just some Club staff member; Blue Rain's captain was too busy to deal with the trainees on a regular basis. Huang Shaotian tuned out and let his gaze wander around the room, across the faces of his various fellow trainees.

He had spoken to all of them at some point or another, a side effect of talking a lot in general, and he had made good friends with a few of them. Bonding over a common interest was always a good way to meet people. And although Huang Shaotian knew he could be annoying at times (okay, a lot of the time), it was difficult for him to find himself annoyed by others.

Except for that kid. Huang Shaotian's eyes stopped on one boy in particular, and narrowed.

Something about that dark-haired boy profoundly irritated Huang Shaotian. Maybe it was the way he didn't respond to taunts or trashtalk (Huang Shaotian wasn't a bully, okay? He insulted everyone equally; there were no hard feelings), or the way he wore that perpetual inscrutably calm expression no matter what happened.

Was he slow in the brain as well as with his hands? Did he not realize that he was just straight-up bad at Glory? What was he doing here, why did he keep struggling with something that so obviously didn't come naturally to him? Huang Shaotian just couldn't understand, and the few mostly-one-sided conversations he'd had with him hadn't been enlightening. Still, if Huang Shaotian searched hard enough inside himself, he found a bit of grudging respect for the other boy.

Well, in the end it didn't really matter; even though that boy had lasted to here, it was only a matter of time before he was eliminated.

Everyone was dispersing to their various computers – with a start, Huang Shaotian realized the staff member had finished talking. What were they doing now…? Huang Shaotian quickly tried to replay in his mind what he had just heard and ignored… elimination coming up soon… keep working hard… ah! They were starting off the day with 1v1 duels, his favorite!

Huang Shaotian slashed his account card through the reader and watched as the familiar figure of Troubling Rain appeared onscreen. He didn't have the best equipment, but he didn't need it to demonstrate his skill. Huang Shaotian was the indisputable, unquestionable number one of the training camp, and though he didn't arrogantly flaunt his prowess, he didn't make any false pretenses at modesty.

"Let's go," he said, a grin creeping over his face. "Who's ready to get their ass kicked today?"

[thestuckylibrary]

What are the best over 90,000 word fics that you have read?

hoo ok here we go

Ain't No Grave (Can Keep My Body Down) by spitandvinegar  

It's six in the morning, and Steve is heading out on a run when he nearly trips over a bouquet of sunflowers on the front steps of his brownstone.

For a second paranoia takes over, and he kicks the flowers a little, waiting for them to explode. They don't. They also came with a card, which he picks up. The front of the card has a tasteful picture of the Brooklyn bridge at sunset. It's very nice and sedate, like the kind of card you would buy to give to your boss. On the inside someone has written a short message in big, shaky block letters.

I AM SORRY FOR SHOOTING YOU.

Steve sits down hard on the steps.

cascades. by orange_crushed

“Holy shit,” Howard says, crackling through the speakers. “You alive in there?” Lying is a sin, of course, but Steve’s not sure what else he can do. He’s already lied to the government and Bucky and God Almighty; and himself, himself most of all. He ought to tell the truth. That he’s not quite what they hoped for. That perhaps they should put him back into the ocean.

“Probably,” he says, instead, listening to Howard’s tinny laughter; and waits for the blast doors to unlock.

If They Haven't Learned Your Name by silentwalrus (WIP)

Steve gets out of the hospital in two days, but just barely. “I’m fine,” he tells Sam, Nurse Eunjung and the phalanx of doctors assigned to make sure Captain America didn’t bleed out and die and get bad PR all over their nice clean hospital. “I have an advanced healing factor. It’s fine. See? I’m standing.”

“That is not standing,” Sam tells him.

“You’re bending the IV stand,” Nurse Eunjung adds pointedly. “Let go and sit down, they don’t grow on trees.”

aka Steve and Bucky's Global Honeymoon Revenge World Tour.

just say you do by biblionerd07

Steve just wanted a job. He wasn't expecting a marriage proposal. And he certainly wasn't expecting to accept.

Middletown: A Study of Suburban Life by M_Leigh

In which Bucky is the new kid, Steve is the square who takes him in, Tony and Pepper fight over valedictorian a year in advance, Thor remains a golden god, Loki remains a drama queen, Natasha commits an act of vigilante justice, Clint somehow fails to make a your mom joke, Darcy is a Satanist, Jane is a goth, Sif is fine thank you very much, Sam climbs a tree, Peggy says no, Rumlow is a bully, and Mrs. Rogers, Mr. Coulson, and Ms. Hill are all very long-suffering.

Or: the story of the year Bucky Barnes finally learned how to talk to at least one other human being, discovered J. D. Salinger, started to try in school (kind of), got a haircut, landed a punch, almost got arrested, and kissed a boy on the mouth.

our golden age by augustbird

Wherein Bucky is the crown prince and Steve still becomes a hero.

Schrödinger's Romance by The_StonedSoldier

“It could be a relationship, it could not be. You can assume either until you see for sure the results."We all know those moments. Those moments when your family all gathers around you and asks "So, do you have a boyfriend yet?". Bucky knows these moments all too well and, quite frankly, he's sick to death of them. Unfortunately, being a 21 year old college student makes it harder for him to come up with excuses, and with Christmas coming up he needs to think of a way out fast. A chance encounter with a stranger through an old library textbook could just be the kind of miracle he needs to make it through the holidays with his last shreds of sanity intact.

Thawed Out by auburnnothenna (auburn), eretria

He's not the Asset. He's not the Winter Soldier. But neither is he Bucky Barnes. With the help of Steve, Sam and the Avengers, James takes the long, slow road to recovery. Nothing is as easy as either of them thought it would be.

The Art Of Cooking For Two by littleblackfox

“Any questions?”“Uh. What the fuck am I doing here?” Bucky offers.

there must have been a moment where we could have said no by magdaliny

The Soldier remembers this: he wakes up in the snow.

To Be Vulnerable Is Needed Most Of All by perfect_plan

Steve is a shy comic book artist and meets his new neighbour, Bucky Barnes.

In which there are awkward longings, meddling best friends, comic conventions, heartache, lemons, video games, dorkiness, dancing and two cute boys.

to memory now I can't recall by Etharei

While on a mission storming a HYDRA facility, James Buchanan Barnes touches one of the many strange alien devices collected by the Red Skull. He does this, in fact, twice— in the past, and in the future.

Next thing he knows, Bucky Barnes is opening his eyes in the 21st century, which is full of great gadgets and coffee, and at least includes his old pal Steve. (And, inexplicably, a different Stark.) Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier finds himself in the middle of World War Two, helping Captain America hunt down HYDRA (which is at least familiar), pretending to be Bucky Barnes (which is not), and figuring out the very noisy group of soldiers who call themselves the Howling Commandos.

War, Children by Nonymos

After Bucky was released from the hospital, it only took him a couple of weeks to give up on himself. Difficult to believe in any kind of future when the simple act of staying alive was almost too big an effort.

Out the frosted window, across the street, there was a tiny homeless guy burrowing under an awning.

[minusram]

under the cut: trans reigen ends up going to his high school reunion (~3.5k?)

-just a few short scenes, it kinda streamed out of me this morning. 

warning for MAJOR headcanoning (fanon ahoyyyy), high school bullying (unrelated to transness!), misgendering, deadnaming, and some minor homophobic language, but it’s really not an angst parade; i just want you to be safe. kinda bittersweet i guess. takes place 1~.5 years before canon

“I’m serious, that’s what happens,” Reigen says, walking next to Mob on their way to an assignment. He still isn’t used to the new uniform, like having a little black shadow keeping pace beside him whenever his student is following him around.

“But how do they get it in?” Mob asks, quietly skeptical.

“A big syringe, and then the carbonation makes the marble swell so it doesn’t fall out.”

“But—”

“I’m telling you, Mob, that’s how they make Ramune bottles. Listen to your master.”

“Reigen-shishou, I don’t think that’s how it works.”

“Reigen?” a woman says from behind him, “Reigen from Saffron High, is that you?”

Reigen can’t move, petrified by panicked shock that someone from back then has recognized him, even after everything; he loses his chance to abscond when she comes around to stand in front of him. Oh fucking hell, it’s Ooka Minami. She was in his class all through high school. He hated high school.

“Hey! Airi-chan! I can’t believe it’s you! Wow you got butch—look at that suit! Guess you really were batting for the other team, ne?”

Then she laughs. And that would be why.

“Gosh, Minami-chan, it’s been years!” Reigen gushes, “And it’s so great to run into each other, but I have to be going, so sorry; huge deadline, business to deal with, you know how it is...” he says, sweat popping up as he manoeuvers to make his belated escape.

“It’s okay, Shishou, I can deal with the spirit. You talk to your friend,” Mob says, extraordinarily and unhelpfully obtuse. If Reigen isn���t going to be able to get out of this conversation he at least doesn’t want Mob hanging around to hear it. Reigen shoos him off, and Mob goes silently into the park to deal with whatever’s been bothering the retirees who sit on the benches there every afternoon. It’ll be fine; this job is small fry, nothing he hasn’t handled before.

“Spirit? ...Shishou?” Ooka asks, skeptical.

“Yes,” Reigen says shortly, “I run an exorcism agency. He’s my student. We have a job. So I should really—”

“Spooky Airi-chan deals with ghosts now? And you were always such a skeptic.”

“Well, it’s a living,” he says, resigned to at least a few niceties. “And you?”

“I’m just out taking care of some errands, picking up stuff for dinner tonight. I know, it’s a little late, but running a household is hard work, especially with two kids around the house. You know how it is,” she says, with a gloating smile.

“I can’t say that I do,” Regein replies, light and dry.

“Oh, you’re not married?”

“No.”

“Better get on that, christmas cake.”

“Thanks for the advice. Well, Minami-chan, this has been spectacularly fun, but unfortunately I do have to go, sorry.”

“Oh, no problem. It was nice to catch up! Do you have a business card?”

“According to social convention,” he says, reluctantly digging out the case to hand one over, “I must admit that I do.” Ooka takes it and skims the contents greedily before tucking it in her wallet.

“I’d return the favour, but I don’t have any. After all, I’m a housewife,” she says with a sweet smile, the same one from back then, when she’d asked him if he had a crush on her in front of the entire class.

“Congratulations. I really must be off now, Minami-chan.”

“Bye, Airi-chan! See you soon!”

Unlikely, Reigen snarls in his head, and “Have a nice day,” pleasantly outside it, face smooth and bland as he turns to go find Mob.

Either there was nothing here or Mob’s taken care of it already, because the kid is being mobbed by a bunch of geezers that practically totter on their feet. Surrounded, he doesn’t notice Reigen until Reigen’s gently elbowed his way to the centre of the throng of old people cooing over Mob’s adorable face. If his student were half as popular with people his own age as he is with grandparents, Reigen might have to do something to prevent his esper from succumbing to the peer pressure of spending time with people not fourteen years his senior.

Reigen tows Mob to freedom, says goodbye to the group, collects payment from the park manager, and sets off back to the office, Mob beside him.

He shoves his hands in his pockets and hears his heartfelt desire for Mob not to mention the encounter like a chant in his head.

“Who was that?” Mob asks, dashing his hopes. Reigen blows breath out through his nose, and answers:

“An old classmate.”

“A classmate?”

“From high school.”

“Oh. Was it nice, to see her again?”

“It’s not the worst thing that’s ever happened to me.”

“Why did she call you -chan?”

“Ahh, it’s an old joke from high school. You… had to be there, ha.”

A joke—yeah, sure.

That’s a good word for it.

-------

A week later, the office gets a letter from his alma mater, and Reigen regrets. Why didn’t he just lie? Nobody from Saffron would ever have thought about him again, but now that Ooka has his contact information it seems he’s been brought back into the mailing list’s fold.

It’s probably about money, isn’t that the sort of correspondence you get from high school?

He opens it; it’s an invitation to his ten-year class reunion, happening soon. It’s a bit late notice, but from the date printed in the corner of the photocopied sheet the rest of the letters were sent out months ago.

Reigen smirks as he balls up the page; there’s nothing in the world that could make him go to that shitshow.

But when he reads the second one, he drops into his seat.

-------

Reigen toys with the zipper on his jacket, sitting on the edge of his bed, ready to hang up if the wrong person answers the phone. He’s relieved when his target picks up on his first try.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Ma.”

“Arataka! Have you finally learned to call me without wild horses dragging you to the phone?”

He lets out a silent sigh and shifts on the mattress to lean on his free hand.

“No, sorry, I’m still trying to find my feet at the ranch. Are you free to talk?”

“For you, always.”

“Great. I have a bit of bad news, we’ll have to reschedule those plans we have in a couple weeks.”

“But why? If this is something to do with that shady business of yours…”

“No, it’s nothing like that. I just thought I’d go to my class reunion, and I just found out. It’s the tenth anniversary, can you believe it?”

“Ten years, really? Oh, time goes by so fast. But Arataka, I’m so pleased! I know it was hard sometimes, but after you graduated I was so sad you lost touch with all your friends.”

His friends, such as they were, were delinquents and thugs who introduced him to smoking, cutting school, and violent self-defense. His parents never knew about them. But they were loyal, and now, years down the line and far too late for it to matter, he finds that he’s a little sad too.

“Well, I can go say hello and goodbye, anyway.”

“Apricot, are you sure? I don’t want you to get hurt...”

“Geez, Ma, what’re they gonna do, beat me up? I can handle myself, don’t worry about it.”

“I am happy you’re going. Fine. You still won’t cut out this psychic nonsense and get a real job?”

“Nope.”

“So when are you going to settle down, then? I don’t care who it is, although I’m aching for grandchildren, Taka, aching, but you need someone to take care of you—”

“Wow look at the time, I’m late, sorry, love you, gotta go,” Reigen blurts, and hangs up. He falls back to bounce against the bed, staring up at the ceiling.

An inelegant retreat, but hey—it works.

He hauls himself up to look into finding an appropriate suit.

-------

Weeks later, Reigen stands just outside the door and listens, pretending he’s scoping out the room and not psyching himself up to face people he thought he was done tolerating a decade ago.

“Eh? A spirit agency, really?! And after all that shit about how ‘ghosts aren’t real’ and ‘there is no afterlife’. God, she never shut up about it!”

“Enlightened Reigen-sama, better than everyone else.”

“Ha, remember when she ruined the haunted house? During the cultural festival… our second year, I think.”

“Oh my god! I completely forgot about that!”

“And when—”

“Yeah! Damn, what a nightmare.”

A pause.

“...I hear she’s a dyke now.”

“Whoa, watch your language, dude.”

“Fine, fine, but still.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, I’m with Ooka-chan on the planning committee, she’s the one who found her.”

“No way, Minami-chan said that? I don’t buy it.”

“They really hated each other back then, it might just be a rumour.”

“But Reigen-chan confessed to her, didn’t she?”

“Whaat? No, no, that was just bullying.”

“Girl bullying, brr.”

“I don’t know, she always seemed kind of weird to me.”

“That’s just because she kicked your ass when you asked her out.”

“Ha!”

“Hey, shut up!”

“You had bruises for a week!”

“She didn’t kick my ass… it was those assholes she always hung out with.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Sure.”

“If you say so.”

“I’m not lying! It was!”

“Okay, dude, whatever.”

Reigen sucks in a slow breath during the lull in the conversation, his back to the wall just outside the door, and remembers the assholes he used to hang out with. One less now, and the thought clenches something stricken in his chest.

“But seriously, she’s a psychic now? What a load of crap.”

“A crossdressing psychic, even.”

“What was her stage name supposed to be again? It was something like… sparkling.”

“Oh wait, it’s on the tip of my tongue—”

“Splendid, marvelous, amazing…”

“Arataka!”

Reigen jumps.

“Yeah, Arataka, that was it.”

“Reigen Arataka, psychic extraordinaire.”

Well it’s hard to ask for a better opening line than that. Reigen steps out, into the gymnasium—patchily decorated, brightly lit—and smiles.

“You rang?”

They startle, all four of them, spinning around to stare. He doesn’t recognize them really, vague faces that populated the halls long ago; except for Honda. He did kick his ass, actually, for asking him out, but also for trying to cop a feel on the roof.

“Holy shit! Did you— I mean, how the fuck are ya, Reigen-san?”

“Yeah, how’ve you been? It’s great to see you.”

“I can’t believe you came!”

“Oh, likewise,” Reigen says with a wintry smile, “It’s so nice to hear from old friends.”

“Haha…” one of them goes, weakly.

Reigen isn’t overtly hostile, but exchanging pleasantries is tense; about who’s working where now, and who got married to whom, and whether that nasty old Mori-sensei died or just retired without a trace.

“This has been very enlightening—you all have so much to say, it seems I’ve really been out of the loop—but I think I see someone over there I can’t get out of saying hello to, if you know what I mean. I’m glad we could catch up.”

“Um, sure…”

“You too…”

“Yeah, go for it…”

Reigen walks off, and hears them start up again behind him.

“What the hell—”

“Was that really her?”

“No way, that was a damn dude! What happened to my cute Reigen-chan?”

“Your Reigen-chan? Honda, man, give it up.”

“Yeah, even if she was into guys, there’s no way she’d pick you.”

“I dunno, I think that suit looked pretty good…”

Their voices fade into the crowd.

-------

Reigen wanders the halls, and comes across a gallery of photos, those that made it into the yearbooks and those that didn’t. He’s surprised to find one of himself, printed out and posted with everyone else. But then, they didn’t all hate him, and even if they did this is all ancient history by now; it’s impossible that everyone on the reunion committee’s as petty as Ooka and those assholes he was eavesdropping on earlier.

It’s Reigen, sixteen years old and staring into the camera, unimpressed. Slim, fierce, blond, flatchested, and wearing the girl’s school uniform, but altered; without the kerchief, and the skirt lengthened down to mid-calf. Hair short, as short as he wears it now, but the cut looks different framing a youthfully feminine face. Tall—for a girl, ha; Reigen got his height early in life—and stance confrontational, feet planted and only half turned to look, photograph showing signs of movement in his clothes and hair like it’s a candid shot. For all he knows it was, he doesn’t remember ever seeing this picture before. Reigen can just make out the cigarette in his younger self’s hand, smoke trail snaking behind the sleeve and ember hidden by the swirling fold of the skirt.

He remembers that kid, remembers living that way; he doesn’t resent being that person even if life was shitty beyond measure the entire time he was.

“Ah, Reigen-kun.”

The voice is familiar, if more warbled than he remembers. Reigen gladly turns to meet it.

“Hey there, Teach,” he grins.

“Still with the hair, I see. When are you going to give that up, you look like a delinquent.”

“I keep telling you, Ikeda-sensei, it’s natural,” he says, grin widening until it’s shit-eating.

“Mmhmm,” Teach hums, skeptical, “That old line. You shouldn’t lie to your elders, Reigen-kun; I’m old, not blind.”

“Honest. I swear,” he says, hand to his heart, perfectly composed into earnestness except for the smile still on his face.

“Oh get over here, you hooligan, and let me look at you.”

Reigen gets over, to be inspected by a spry woman, age only slowly catching up to her under the cardigan and dyed hair, arms folded across her chest.

“As rough as ever,” she concludes with a small smile, after a detailed visual inspection, “Airi-kun, you haven’t changed a bit. Although the suit is new, I suppose. But it looks good on you, very charming.”

That name in the mouth of someone he respects twigs him something awful. Reigen looks at her, considering, and though his heart pounds he decides to go for it.

“Well, Teach,” the nickname comes out a little croaky, but he musters and continues, “I have changed a little bit. Or, I suppose you could say I’ve grown more honest with myself.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, um, I— I go by… Arataka… these days,” he says, and is immediately filled with regret. He shoves a hand up against his mouth, trying to seem pensive and patient rather than freaked out and on the verge of running away. He can’t stand to watch her, to see if it hits, so he snaps his head to the side to look at the pictures again. If that was too subtle for her he’s just going to give up; there’s no way he can say it again.

“Oh,” she says, and his pulse jumps even higher with the word, “Arataka...

“Well, Arataka-kun, you look very handsome, then.”

The laugh bursts out of him, one tense bark before he gets a hold of himself and turns back to look. She’s gazing at him calmly, seemingly unruffled. She doesn’t scream at him, or assume he must be joking, or berate him for growing into such a disappointment. Maybe this is fine, maybe he hasn’t just ruined one of the few things worth keeping from his troubled adolescence.

“R-right. Thank you,” he says, a little shaky.

“You’re welcome to it, Reigen-kun, I promise. And… I’m sorry about Abe-kun. I know you were friends.”

“Yeah,” Reigen says, personal revelations forgotten as he looks down at the scratched linoleum, head full of ghosts and memories. Of people from back then, the last time he was here.

“Yeah,” he says, swallowing, “Me too.”

-------

The memorial service for Abe Katashi is short, awkward, and perfunctory.

An only child whose parents have been dead since he and Reigen still ran together, there’s no one to put together anything better than the impersonal effort of the Saffron High planning committee.

Reigen looks around as someone he doesn’t remember drones on apathetically about tragic loss and road safety to an uncomfortably shifting crowd, and doesn’t see anyone else from their little gang in attendance.

Depressingly, he finds only school employees and former classmates with even less claim to closeness than his own.

No friends have come forward from outside the school; Abe lived alone.

This will be the only funeral.

-------

After the feeble sham of a service, everyone parties; lights dim, chatting loud, bad dancing and standard karaoke combining in an unholy musical mess.

Reigen gets drunk at the bar.

Ooka finds him there, slumped, plastered already from half a glass of sake, and sits next to him.

“Enjoying yourself?” she asks, signalling the bartender for another glass.

“Are you kidding me?” Reigen replies, inebriated and indiscreet.

“Oh, well, it is such a shame about Abe-kun, of course. He had a sort of rough charm, back in school. Shiori had such a crush on him, you know.”

“I didn’t. Shiori… was she the one with the weird nose? Or the one who couldn’t keep her eyes of Fujioka-sensei’s ass during P.E.?”

Ooka laughs as the bartender comes back, putting her glass on a napkin in front of her.

“The second. Although between you and me, I have no clue what she saw in that man. He was already going bald ten years ago.”

“Some people like old things,” Reigen mumbles into his arms, folded on the bartop, “but he always kinda looked like beef jerky.”

Ooka laughs again and holds up the bottle. Fuck it. Reigen drains the glass for her to pour.

He sits up to return the favour. Why is she talking to him?

“Why are you talking to me?” he asks. Whoops. Possibly downing the sake wasn’t such a good idea. Well, he’ll nurse the next one.

“Aren’t we friends?” Ooka asks, disingenuous. Alright, they’re doing this then. Might as well, it’s not like he’ll ever see any of these people again.

“No, we’re not. You made that pretty damn clear when we were fifteen. I thought we were, though, until then.” Shit, too honest, too honest. This was definitely a bad idea. Reigen moves to disengage, to hell with the drink. It’s an open bar anyway.

Minami catches his arm before he can push away from the counter. Reigen stops, frozen, breathing picking up from the hand dangerously close to his wrist. She squeezes, just a little, and he rips away, almost toppling off the stool before he catches himself on the edge of the bar.

“Don’t, um, I don’t— like. Being touched, there,” he says, eyes wide. Minami looks startled, and suspicious, but visibly brushes it off.

“Fine. But it’s rude to just walk away, we were talking.”

“You know what else is rude? Calling someone a lesbian in public.”

“Even if it’s true?”

“It’s not— Agh! It’s not, I’m not a lesbian, I like both, okay, now will you cut it out?”

“Oh.”

“What. After all that, you gonna tell me you didn’t know?”

“No, I’m just surprised you’re admitting it to me.”

“Well, I am pretty drunk.”

“Yeah, Airi, I can tell.”

She’d know. He was fourteen when he tried booze for the first time, in Minami’s room the last summer before they thought they’d part forever, trading sips from a warm beer they stole from the stash hidden in her parents’ apartment; talking about how grown-up they’d be, once they were high school students.

“Why did you do it? That, to me? We were best friends in middle school, but once we graduated it was like you just fucking despised me. You made my life miserable, Minami, and I’ve never understood why.”

“Oh, I don’t know. It was so long ago.”

“What the fuck,” Reigen says. He can feel himself getting worked up, he’s always been a terribly melancholy drunk. “Is that shitty cop-out supposed to mean something? ‘Oh, it was a long time ago. Why don’t you get over it already?’ I can’t believe you did that to me, it was horrible. Everyone hated me! No one would talk to me, not a single person, for weeks! And it was all your fault. I thought you were my friend! And after what I did for you, even, after your dad—”

“Shut up,” Minami snaps, low and intense.

Reigen’s teeth click shut.

“Fine,” he says quietly, half to her and half to himself, “Fine, I’m done. I don’t know why I came here, what I thought would happen…” He sighs. “Bye, Minami-chan, have a nice life. I don’t think we’ll meet again.”

She huffs, and pinches his sleeve to stop him from walking away.

“I don’t know, Airi. I just… did. It was a weird time for me.”

“Whatever, Minami. For the record, it was a weird time for me too.”

and.. yep *shrug* that all i got (well, except a few spare lines that don’t have scenes attached...) this is basically just a write&dump 

ended up with a lot of dialogue, and none of my favourite parts of ‘high school reunion’ fics. may or may not continue, we’ll see

feel free to point out typos, or concrit, or whatever. i’d actually love to hear any thoughts! (as always)

[wrestlingisfake]

Survivor Series preview

Brock Lesnar vs. AJ Styles - Lesnar is the WWE universal champion, the top titleholder on Raw; Styles is the WWE world heavyweight champion, the top titleholder on Smackdown.  Neither title is at stake.  This started out with Jinder Mahal as world champion challenging Lesnar, but then Mahal lost his title to Styles and now has to watch from backstage.

The situation with Jinder almost overshadows this match, because he was WWE’s big project (to turn a total jobber into a dominant world champion and the face of their expansion into India), and now he’s not even booked for the biggest show of the fourth quarter.  The only real hook to this match when it was Brock vs. Jinder was that WWE was stubbornly determined to protect both guys over all objections, and suddenly that’s out the window.  It makes you wonder what’s going on behind the scenes, although the only story anyone has heard is that everybody just decided Styles and Lesnar would simply deliver a better performance.

I’m not really hyped to see this because I don’t expect Styles has a chance in hell of beating Lesnar, or even coming close.  All of Brock’s matches since Wrestlemania have been disappointing, and that was with the spectacle of seeing him fight guys big enough to bully him back.  Styles is barely a heavyweight, and although WWE could book a guy that small to be competitive against Brock, history suggests that they won’t.

Raw vs. Smackdown 10-man elimination tag team match - In keeping with Survivor Series tradition, the loser of each fall is eliminated and must go backstage while his partners continue without him.  The match can only end when one (or both) teams is completely eliminated.

The Raw side is:

Kurt Angle (team captain/Raw general manager)

Triple H

Finn Balor

Samoa Joe

Braun Strowman

The Smackdown side is:

Shane McMahon (team captain/Smackdown commissioner)

John Cena

Randy Orton

Shinsuke Nakamura

Bobby Roode

It’s a pretty stacked lineup, considering all the champions are booked in other matches. The Raw side has 28 world titles between them, while the Smackdown side has 35.  Several one-on-one combinations could be considered dream matches; some have already happened and been considered very good.

The main storyline heading into this has been the increasing pressure on Angle to defend Raw from Smackdown, as his boss (commissioner Stephanie McMahon) has returned to TV to chew him out.  At one point Kurt had assigned his (kayfabe) son Jason Jordan to the team, only for Stephanie’s husband Triple H to beat Jordan up and take the spot in a show of no confidence.  It’s been heavily implied that Angle will lose his spot as general manager if his team loses this match.

Last year’s version of this match lasted almost an hour, evidently to make avoid the problem of rapid eliminations making the wrestlers look unusually weak.  This year’s lineup would probably be protected at least as much, if not more.  It would be extremely weird if, say Samoa Joe got taken out after five minutes with a clothesline or something, and he’s probably the most expendable guy in the match.  So hopefully this’ll be an epic war, to pay off the hype surrounding a month of big “Raw and Smackdown brawl all over the building” angles.

I wouldn’t count on the match setting up and story beats for the future, although it’d make some sense if Jason Jordan got involved (possibly at his own side’s expense), or for something to raise tensions between Triple H and Kurt Angle.  John Cena is technically a free agent with no allegiance to either side, so that could factor in somehow.  WWE has done shockingly little with the Strowman vs. Kane feud since Strowman was crushed to death in a trash compactor, so I gotta figure Kane will run in to cause Braun’s elimination.

It’s genuinely hard to pick an outcome here, because of all the chaos that is assured.  You’d figure the team with Shane is at a serious disadvantage, but a few key disqualifications or count-outs could change that real quick.  All things being equal, if Angle is going to keep wrestling here and there to set up a Wrestlemania match, it’d make the most sense for him to have his hand raised at the end.

Roman Reigns & Seth Rollins & Dean Ambrose vs. Big E & Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods - Roman, Seth, and Dean dominated WWE as the Shield from 2012 until their breakup in 2014.   Shortly thereafter, Kofi, Big E, and Xavier formed the New Day and quickly became the definitive trio in WWE.  Now the Shield are back on Raw, while the New Day is on Smackdown, and we’re doing a bunch of Raw/Smackdown fights.  So we get a dream match between the two biggest factions of 2010s WWE.

The match was set up by the New Day doing a distraction to cost Seth and Dean the Raw tag team title, which iced them out of the “tag champs vs. tag champs” match on this show and effectively freed them up for this.  Roman has just recently come back from some viral infection that kept him out of the planned Shield reunion last month, so this is a pretty decent make good.  It’s not the way I’d have wanted to set up this match, but I’m glad we’re getting it.

The Shield specializes in facing ad hoc trios that can’t match them in terms of teamwork and cooperation.  They’ve rarely faced a full-time trio that can truly match them at that game like the New Day.  On the other hand, the New Day specializes in two-on-two programs with the advantage of always having a third guy providing backup.  They haven’t dealt with their opponents finding reinforcements to even the odds as much as the Shield has, so a six-man tag against a well-oiled machine could give them trouble.  I’d like to see the psychology of the match demonstrate all this, but I’m not holding my breath.  I’ll settle for Dean trying to break Xavier’s trombone or something.

Since all the plans for the Shield reunion in October got shot to hell, it’d be absolutely insane for them to lose now.  That sucks because I’d prefer a scenario where either team could plausibly win, but the New Day can be as entertaining in defeat as they are in victory.

Alexa Bliss vs. Charlotte Flair - Bliss is the Raw women’s champion and Flair is the Smackdown women’s champion; neither title is on the line.  The match was originally announced as Alexa vs. Natalya until Charlotte dramatically won the Smackdown women’s title in her hometown and celebrated with her father (who is recovering from a health scare).  So Charlotte’s on a roll and she’s clearly a company favorite with friends in high places.  On the other hand, WWE has such a weird boner for Alexa so I think she’s just gonna win.

Raw vs. Smackdown 10-woman elimination tag team match - This is the second of two traditional Survivor Series matches.

The Raw side is:

Alicia Fox (team captain)

Nia Jax

Sasha Banks

Asuka

Bayley

The Smackdown side is:

Becky Lynch (team captain)

Naomi

Carmella

Tamina

Natalya

This amounts to “all the women on Raw but Mickie James and Dana Brooke” versus “all the women on Smackdown but Lana.”  (Theoretically Paige and Nikki Bella are still out there, somewhere, but I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for them to show up here.)

Historically, women’s Survivor Series matches have suffered from being too short, too sloppy, or too dull.  However, this is probably the strongest lineup WWE has ever booked, so they could probably give us a good match.  Whether WWE will let them do a good match remains to be seen.  I suspect this is going to get 15 minutes and half the falls are going to feel rushed and pointless.

The Raw side pretty much has to win, if only to preserve the mystique of Asuka’s win streak.  (If she’s counted out here, nobody will consider it a blemish on her record, but there’s no good reason to even go there.)  You’ll notice I’m picking Raw to sweep all the matches that actually matter.

Sheamus & Cesaro vs. Jimmy Uso & Jey Uso - Shesaro are the Raw tag team champions and the Usos are the Smackdown tag team champions; neither title is at stake.  Both teams have always been good and both seem to have turned it up a little lately, so maybe that’s why they switched this from Ambrose/Rollins vs. Usos a couple of weeks ago.  Smackdown really needs something to crow about so I’m thinking this match will be one of them.  Usos win.

The Miz vs. Baron Corbin - Miz is the intercontinental champion on Raw, and Corbin is the United States champion on Smackdown.  This isn’t for either title.  Both guys suck and their only skill is cutting internet message board promos that make their opponents look shitty.  So it’s a battle of two guys who suck at everything but making each other look like they suck even more.  Hell, Dave Meltzer called this his bathroom break match.  I may go to the bathroom and take a shower just to make sure I don’t accidentally come back in time to actually see any of this.  Fuck both guys.

Enzo Amore vs. Kalisto - Amore is defending the cruiserweight championship on the pre-show, in the only title fight on the entire card.  Kalisto has already beaten Amore and dropped the title back to him, so this is the rubber match.  I’m pretty sure we’re about to be done with this feud and Amore is moving on to the next challenger, so he should make short work of Kalisto.

[trendingnewsb]

A Proven Way to Make Underperformers Do Much Better

You know your child is smart. She exhibits intelligence every day, and family friends have remarked about how bright she is. But when report card day comes it’s like someone is evaluating a different child. What happened on the way to school? Did she travel into an alternate universe?

At first as the bad grades start to emerge, you think your child will pull out of it. You just need to help her with the homework, help her understand the concepts better. Yet your attempts to help are like banging your head against a wall. The will to perform is just not there.

You’re not alone. Plenty of children and teens are underperformers. Child psychologist Dr. Sylvia Rimm [1]says, “Underlying these children’s poor study habits, weak skills, disorganization, and defensiveness is a feeling of a lack of personal control over their educational success.” Some kids just don’t feel personally invested in getting good grades.

This is becoming a real problem because your child isn’t learning what it means to work hard and succeed at something. School is “boring,” the teachers “suck,” the other kids are “jerks.” You’re pulling teeth just to get her to finish and turn in assignments, and when test time comes, it seems like she’s tanking on purpose.

If your child doesn’t learn how to perform up to her potential in school, how will she be able fulfill that potential in real life?

The key is to connect your child’s educational goals to her life through strategy, affirmation, and rewards.

Introduce Values-Based Self-Affirmation

Stress is a huge factor for kids in school. You can remember what it’s like, but there’s nothing quite like being there. Values-based self-affirmation [2]is a proven method of confronting stress and empowering your child to cope with it positively.

In multiple studies, African-American and Latino American students thought about and wrote about what was most important to them. These students face a lot of stress due to their minority status, and it causes them to underperform. They wrote about their values at critical times of stress during the school year—at the outset, before tests, and around holidays.

The students saw a 30 percent improvement in performance, and their grade-point averages were much higher than students who didn’t do values-affirmation assignments. This also worked for female college students in physics.

Brain scans [3] show that self-affirmation increases activity in the self-related and reward-related areas of the brain. Values affirmation also reduces cortisol response [4]in students, effectively lowering stress levels and heart rate.

Sit down with your child when she’s feeling stressed out about school and ask her to write about what she values—her relationships, her interests, her passions. Ask her to write a little bit about how her values relate to her future. Do the exercise with her, and keep it up as the school year continues.

Adopt Strategies that Work for Professionals

The people who teach and tutor for a living and do it well depend on engaging their students. Chances are you may be pushing your child away from performing well by putting on pressure and expectations that aren’t necessarily helping your child engage with the material.

To take advantage of strategies for engaging underperforming students [5]

● Make it relevant: Talk about and show your child how school subjects apply to things she really likes—e.g., her favorite movie had a scriptwriter who learned reading comprehension in English class, an actress who got good enough grades to go to art school, an accountant who learned how to crunch numbers in math class

● Make it engaging: If there are any subjects your child is doing well at, or at least making an effort to understand, praise their effort; ignore the negative and focus on the positive—it’s proof she can make an effort with other things, too

● Focus on emotion: How does it feel when your child does well at something? How does it feel when she blows it off and performs poorly? Ask open-ended questions

● Note what stimulates her intellect: Pay attention to the intellectual challenges she does want to tackle, as they may be much more difficult than what she’s getting at school; think about ways you can connect under- stimulating challenges to those that stimulate her

● Don’t forget physicality: This can come in the form of rewards she can touch and feel, or punishments that take away physical livelihood; it can also be an interactive, physical method of learning

● Create structure: Your child needs you to model organization and structure; craft a homework routine and stick with it

Focusing on these strategies will help you align with what her teachers are doing at school. Talk to her teachers and ask what strategies they’re using the most. Find out if they’ve seen any bright spots, any moments when your child has been engaged. Request regular updates about any sort of positive engagement, and focus on that engagement in conversations with your child.

Follow Through with Rewards

Self-affirmation will help your child understand she can do it. Now it’s time to seal the deal.

Your child’s everyday life is full of stimulus. Her interactions with friends are rewarding, entertainment is rewarding, technology is rewarding, even exercise is rewarding. All of these things cause her brain to release stimulating chemicals.

Interactions with her boyfriend and close friends cause her pituitary gland to release oxytocin [6], a hormone related to social bonding. Her experiences with entertainment, technology, and any sort of stimulating substances cause her brain to release dopamine, a neurotransmitter directly linked to motivation and rewards. Dopamine release is heightened in teens [7], causing them to take risks even when they’re aware of the consequences. And exercise stimulates the release of endorphins [8] .

If there’s no stimulus involved in doing well at school, chances are your child is bored and doesn’t connect schoolwork to reality. And with good reason: when we do work and do it well, we get a paycheck. Why shouldn’t it be the same with school?

You don’t necessarily have to pay your child for getting A’s, but it doesn’t hurt. Here are some ways to offer rewards:

● Pay attention: Positive attention from you is a reward—it’s a social stimulus; pay heightened attention to academic life, delve deep, ask stimulating questions

● Involve her in a study group: This is a way to connect social life to schoolwork; talk to her friends’ parents about setting up a group

● Offer concrete rewards and don’t avoid punishments: A study group is all fine and good, but what if they don’t do any work? Use a favorite activity as reward for work completed, and remove privileges when she underperforms

Underperformers need consistent rewards to connect academic performance to their everyday livelihood. They’re smart enough to do well in school, but they’re at a time in their life when the only thing that matters is having fun. Rewards may sound old-school, but they work.

Author’s note: How do I know rewards work? When I was in school, my parents consistently paid me for every A and B on my report card. I graduated from high school with a 3.98 GPA.

Need some more advice? Your child may be withdrawing from school because it’s too much for her—there are bullies, deadlines, pressure to make friends. There are a lot of fear-inducing factors. Here’s a list of books to help make school less scary . The more interested and less afraid of school your child is, the better she’ll be at executing a great academic performance.

Reference

[1]^Sylvia Rimm, Ph.D: Bright Kids, Poor Grades: And What You Can Do About It[2]^Standard Business: The Value of “Values Affirmation[3]^Science of Us: Brain Scans Can Help Explain Why Self-Affirmation Works[4]^Otium: Values Affirmation Is Powerful[5]^Concordia University: Strategies for Engaging Under Performing Students[6]^Live Science: Oxytocin: Facts About the ‘Cuddle Hormone’[7]^The Atlantic: Dopamine and Teenage Logic[8]^HowStuffWorks: What are endorphins?

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