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svngiem-remade · 1 year

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#! — WHEN YOU ARE DATING ANOTHER MEMBER | in SKZ

pairing. OT8!skz + gn!reader (sadder tho)

genre. angst

warnings. unrequited love, heartbreak, crying, jealousy, smoking.

wc. 3k

synopsis. sad hours, just so so sad.

... ♡ | bang chan

He thought he was going to be fine, to feel happy even when Felix came up one day in his studio and told him he’d started dating you, his ex.

You’d broken up on good terms about a year prior to that conversation and had decided to remain friends to avoid dividing your friend group, and honestly, because imagining a life with either of you out of the picture was impossible— the fact that you went back 15 years and spent 5 of them as a couple was definitely the cause of that.

You’d hesitated breaking up with him at first, but it just… wasn’t working anymore. You felt as if you had a roommate with whom you shared a bed with, not a boyfriend, a life partner; the feelings weren't there anymore, for you.

But him? His feelings were still there. He’d never stopped loving you, and, sometimes, even fell asleep on the side of the bed you used to sleep on as he buried his face into the only t-shirt you’d forgotten into the apartment you used to share.

He knew what he was doing was never going to let him move on from you, and little did he still wish you’d give your relationship another shot, however, when he noticed the bright smile you always wore on your face became even brighter and your cheerful personality started blooming and growing right in front of his eyes once you’d officially started dating Felix, he realized that maybe breaking up with him was the best decision you could’ve ever made in your life. And if you were happy, he was even happier for you.

... ♡ | lee minho

When he’d introduced you to his members right after a concert, he would've never thought you would hit it off and start dating his best friend Jisung— but how could you not? You were a match on everything, from music taste to fashion choices to plans for the future— how could he ever compare with him? With your chemistry?

At first, he thought he just felt jealous of how much more time you spent with your boyfriend, after all, you and Minho had always been attached to the hip since middle school, but when he started hating seeing you two cuddle, kiss, or just act all lovey-dovey around him, he acknowledged he was in love with you, and has been ignoring you ever since, something you’d both noticed.

But forcing himself not to look at your stunning figure standing proudly beside Jisung at an event you were invited to, radiating confidence and charisma with every step, was so difficult that it hurt him physically, so he kept looking for distractions— be it drinking, or going out for *multiple* smokes with random idols that were also attending the event, all desperate attempts to make you lose sight of him whenever he noticed you’d start walking in his direction.

“Shit—” Minho sprinted to the nearest balcony and hiding in a dark corner when he spotted you untangling your arm from your boyfriend’s and turning to look at him. He lit a cigarette again to try to calm his nerves, leaning on the wall behind him. But then, you found him.

“Why have you been ignoring me and Jisung lately? Do you know how sad he is because you wouldn't talk to him unless it’s for an interview or talker while you seemingly have no problem chatting with other people? Tch.” you scoffed, crossing your arms as you waited for an explanation.

“Jisung, Jisung, Jisung, It's always him you're talking about.” he snapped, throwing the cigarette on the ground and turning to look at you, “What about me, huh? I’m fucking in love with you, and it hurts so much, because I know I will never have you. What about my feelings?” he clicked his tongue, standing up straight once again to walk towards you, a pained look on his sharp features, “Please, say something. Reject me so I can move on.” his voice trembled as he looked into your eyes with furrowed brows, waiting for your answer.

... ♡ | seo changbin

With your heads low, you and Hyunjin confessed you’d been dating each other in secret for almost a year, but— why wasn't Changbin surprised? You’d always been clearly in love with each other for years, though you were hesitant to start a relationship as you both knew about his pretty heavy crush on you.

You’d tried keeping it on the low, to not make him notice you’d started dating, but you weren't as slick as you’d thought you were. Changbin noticed the looks of desire you exchanged when you all hung out together, the giggles and smiles, the love bites and puffy lips you both had after one of you came back from the bathroom, the other one sneaking out of the room a few seconds after.

He couldn't be mad with either of you even if he tried though, he’d always known deep down that you’d never reciprocate his feelings, but it still hurt like a b*tch.

“We just hope this won't change anything between us, let's not be awkward, please. But if you need to distance yourself for a while, we completely understand.” Hyunjin was doing all the talking while you were sitting on the couch next to him, biting your lips and playing with the ends of your long sleeves sweater.

You spoke up after a moment of awkward silence, resting your hand on his knee, “Binnie, I hope this… this doesn't make you uncomfortable.” you whispered with a small frown on your eyebrows.

He forced a smile and let out a small chuckle, trying to look unphased as he looked you both in the eyes, “Don't worry guys, l've known about your relationship for months now, you were not that slick, but thank you for thinking about my feelings, I’m grateful.” he said, though a punch in the face would've hurt less, “I've actually been seeing someone for a couple of weeks now and I'm happy, so please, don't be awkward around me, I’m fine.” lies, he wasn't dating anyone, but he knew that if he told you he did, you both would be less uncomfortable around him.

You smiled widely and shot up from the couch to hug the older one, “Binnie! But why haven't you said anything about this before?! I’m sad.” you pouted, squeezing his back.

“I'll tell you everything later, but how about we call the others and go eat some fried chicken to celebrate? I'II pay!”

... ♡ | hwang hyunjin

As Stray Kids’ main choreographer, most of your time was spent in their company, brainstorming ideas and concepts with them, mainly with Minho, when it was time to create choreographies for a new album.

And due to your mutual interest in dance, you and Minho got close in no time, going from dancing in the practice room, to dancing in the sheets in a span of only a couple of months since you joined the agency. If someone had asked you at the time where your relationship stood, you would've deemed it a friends-with-benefits agreement, which rapidly evolved into a very serious, committed relationship.

And, quite honestly, it made Hyunjin sad. Harsh, but true. He'd been liking you for years, first meeting you when you were both trainees, even keeping in touch when you’d left the company to pursue your dream of becoming a choreographer.

“Okay guys, let’s take a 10 minute break, do the choreography three more times and then go home!” loud cheers erupted at your words, the boys rushing either to go to the bathroom, take a sip of water, or lay down on the cold floor to relax their sore muscles.

You pecked Minho’s cheek as a thank you when he offered to go fetch a bottle of cold water for you from the vending machine, walking towards a very tired looking Hyunjin with a slight frown, “You okay? Need more than 10 minutes?” you quietly asked as you looked down at him.

His eyes were shut, trying with all his might to calm down his breathing and force himself to not look at you— he knew he wouldn’t be able to hide how much he enjoyed seeing you like that— at you panting heavily with your hair stuck to your wet forehead and neck, small droplets of sweat running down your face, some landing on your lips, others traveling down your neck and going under your now very see-through shirt. It all drove him crazy, and he envied Minho so much for having that sight every night.

At your question, he shook his head, draping an arm over his eyes. You hummed, “Tell me if you do need a longer break though, you look exhausted.” you insisted, showing him a small smile even though he couldn’t see it before walking over to the black couch at the corner of the room and plopping down next to your boyfriend, softly pressing your lips on his shoulder.

Minho smiled widely, whispering something at you which made you chuckle and gently pinch his cheek before he leaned his head down to capture your lips in a slow kiss, side-eyeing with a noticeable smirk a very annoyed Hyunjin laying on the floor a few feet away, who suddenly got up and stormed out of the practice room— he definitely needed some space, both from you and your boyfriend, who never lost the chance to rub in the fact that you were with him instead of Hyunjin.

... ♡ | han jisung

“I— I’m sorry, I didn't— I had no idea you still liked me…” you shuffled uncomfortably on the couch, looking away from Jisung, who immediately widened his eyes at your words, a feeling of panic taking over his body after the initial shock.

He lunged forward, taking your hands in his and gently tugging them, “No! That’s— That’s not true! It was in the past, way before you got together with— with Changbin! I’ve stopped liking you like in… in— in highschool! Yeah, in highschool!” he stumbled over his words, trying to make it sound convincing enough.

You frowned, “Oh. I— I accidentally walked past the kitchen a few days ago and heard you tell Minho you still liked someone and I thought I heard my name and—” you rambled, embarrassed to have ever even thought your best friend may have still liked you after all those years, “I’m sorry for eavesdropping, but— but it wasn’t intentional! I swear! Oh my God, I’m so embarrassed! Sorry for assuming that—” you begged for forgiveness, pulling him into a warm hug. A hug that he lingered into for longer than he should've— for God’s sake, you were his friend’s partner, he literally knew he was about to pop the question a couple of hours from now and he still harbored feelings you’d gently rejected more than once, both in middle and high school, even a drunken one during college. He knew he had to move on, but why was it so hard?

Reluctant, Jisung broke the hug and rested his hands on your shoulders, lightly shaking you, “Don’t worry, it wasn't important anyways.” he showed you his signature gummy smile, holding his pinky out for you to grab, “No more secrets?”

You smiled widely, “No more secrets.” you linked your pinky with his, pulling him into another hug the second after, mumbling an “I love you, Ji” in his ear, to which he gulped and held back tears.

Then, your phone rang, and the sight of Changbin’s name popping on the screen made you immediately break the hug and pick up your phone from the coffee table, a big smile on your face appearing as you answered your boyfriend’s call.

Yeah, you were definitely going to say yes.

... ♡ | lee felix

Feeling burnt out and in desperate need of a break, two weeks ago Felix decided to go on an impromptu day trip to a nearby small town, and the way his heart fluttered and his freckled cheeks reddened when you first locked eyes as the sweet smell of pastries and coffee filled his lungs inside the small cafè he’d just walked into made him think you two coming across each other was written in the stars— he truly did.

He’d started going to that cafè, where you worked as a barista in, every day after that, the hour-long train ride being completely worth it once he heard your honey-like voice and saw your sweet smile greet him as soon as you walked through the door.

He’d thought he’d made his intentions clear to you, and he thought you liked him too by the way you were behaving with him, so a few days prior he walked into the cafè with a box of homemade chocolate cookies in hand and the most adorable blush ever, he mumbled out a small “Would you… go on a date with me?”

You felt flattered, but sweetly explained that you were already in a relationship, a long-term one, in fact— which surprised him, since you’d never mentioned it. He felt completely mortified by his misinterpretation of your friendliness, quickly gathering up his things from the table he’s occupied to go back home as soon as possible, until he spotted a familiar face entering the building. “Seung?” he mumbled, widening his eyes when he saw him leaning over the counter and pecking your lips quickly before starting to chat with you.

He then noticed the way you looked up at him, adoration and love visible in your eyes, which caused him to tear up and hurry out of the cafè, the box of heart-shaped brownies he’d made for you gripped tightly in his hands.

... ♡ | kim seungmin

When you two first locked eyes at a fan sign, he thought you also felt that spark, that connection— your heart skipping a beat and your cheeks burning up, the happiness busting in your heart and the butterflies in your stomach, so he became concerned when you never texted or called him on the number he’d written down on your album.

He'd spent hours, days, weeks, and months wondering if he had done something wrong, if you perhaps already had a partner, or if something terrible had happened to you— you were all he could think about day and night, and he was worried sick. That’s why the air turned tense when he spotted you walking hand in hand with Jeongin inside the Korean barbecue place, who then cheerily introduced you to his members as his partner, seemingly oblivious to your history with Seungmin.

All the pieces finally connected when the youngest member explained to the table how ecstatic he was when you’d called the number he’d, also, written down on your album during the fan sign, and immediately went on a date with him— Seungmin felt tears prickling at his eyes, but he wasn’t going to leave just yet. He finally had the chance to get to know you and, hopefully, form a friendship with you, and he wasn’t going to let it go to waste— but trying to calm down his pounding heart and flushed cheeks was much harder than he’d thought. You were just so… so you, how could stop liking you when you looked so adorable?

The little wrinkles that formed at the tails of your eyes whenever you smiled, the way you aggressively moved your hands when talking about something you were passionate about, or how you quietly giggled after Jeongin whispered something in your ear— he was jealous, so so jealous of his friend. He wanted to be yours and you to be his so desperately it hurt him, but the thought that maybe, in another lifetime or universe, you'd be finally his comforted him.

In this one though, he'd decided to settle for friendship.

... ♡ | yang jeongin

As childhood best friends, you and Jeongin have been through thick and thin together, always sticking by each other's side no matter what, carefully picking up the pieces when one of you broke down, and being the other’s shoulder to cry on— and all that was exactly why everyone thought that one day you would become a couple, and so did he.

The same day he’d finally decided to own up to his feelings and pour his heart out to you in the middle of the night, his bandmate Chan was the one to open your apartment door after he’d knocked on it thrice, the older one’s half-naked and sweaty body hiding yours behind his frame, which Jeongin could see was in the same situation as his Hyung.

Then, he was sure he quite literally heard his heart break into a million pieces as his foxy eyes welled up with tears. He apologized with a deep bow and ran out of your apartment building, crying his eyes out, throwing in the trash the beautiful bouquet of flowers he’d bought for you on the way back to his dorm.

Exactly two years after that, you got engaged to Chan, a cheerful text and set of pictures sent by him on the group chat as it flooded with congratulating messages made his heart fill with regret— would he be the one getting married to you soon if he had knocked on your door first that night?

“Congratulations, man! I just received the invitation to your wedding, but I won’t be able to make it; I have to attend a very important schedule in Japan that day.” Jeongin lied, he was free for that entire month actually, he just... wasn't sure if he could stand the sight of you saying “I do.” to another man— to someone that wasn’t him.

“Thank you, we both appreciate it! However, is there no way you can move that schedule to another day? You know we’d love to see you at our wedding— plus, I thought it was implied that you were going to be my best man.” Chan mumbled, and Jeongin immediately regret his words, “If you can’t, that’s… fine, I guess, but it’s such an important day for the both of us and—”

“I’ll see what I can do, Hyung.” the younger one interrupted, his friend’s sad tone making him slump back on his living room couch as he held back tears.

Getting over you was much more difficult than he could’ve ever anticipated, but missing such an important milestone in the lives of his favorite people in the entire world? That should’ve never even been an option.

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— pink = unable to tag!

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chrollohearttags · 1 year

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𝖗𝖊𝖛𝖊𝖗𝖇 • 𝖊. 𝖏𝖆𝖊𝖌𝖊𝖗: chapter four

synopsis: after a successful performance at Rolling Loud, (y/n) is approached by a member of the talent agency with a proposition that she can’t refuse. Because of this, she finds herself sacrificing her prior plans with EJ. Where she fears that she’s pushed the rapper away. But passing time and building tensions cause the pair to reveal their true feelings that they never got to reveal in person.

prev chapter >>> next chapter

cw: language, mentions of alcohol and weed, sexual themes, phone sex, masturbation, dirty talk

wc: 7.4k

📝: I know you guys have been waiting patiently on this one and I promise I’m not tired of it or anything, full fic chapters just take a bit more time and I didn’t want to rush or half ass it. So I hope y’all enjoy.

“And what would you say if I told you I wanted you just as bad..would you hold it against me?” “When I want to fuck the shit out of you? Not at all..”

“What exactly do you have in mind?..”

the first words to fly from (y/n)’s mouth amid this mystery man’s proposition. True enough, he may have been a representative on behalf of your talent agency but you didn’t know him from a hole in the ground. And why come here of all places? Wouldn’t this be better suited for an office. Still, you’d hear him out for the hell of it. “We want you to star in one of our artist’s new music videos. He begins rolling out his album this week and he’ll be dropping the lead single. We figured what better way to get people talking than to have a rising star like you alongside him.”

what should have been a compliment seemed a bit backhanded in your eyes. Naturally, it made sense to have someone popular as yourself next to him to garner attention but you couldn’t help but think that he was picturing you as more of a controversy piece than anything. Homie hopping through different rappers was not a good look. leaning against the doorway, you’d furrow your brow a bit, folding your arms as well. He could sense that you were a little hesitant of the idea but he was sure he’d sell you on the idea eventually.“I’ll be honest, that performance tonight was incredible. What you did out there was beyond words. It’s only been an hour and the internet is going crazy. You’re a big deal, miss (l/n)..I wouldn’t take it lightly. In fact, he specifically requested you.”

for a moment, you’d sit with his words and just ponder on what he meant. Naturally, you were a bit skeptical that this mysterious man just approached you out of nowhere and asked to be in a music video. The problem wasn’t exactly the offer itself as you were deeply flattered but rather the fact that it was only being extended to you..“No offense, Mr. Smith, but I wasn’t the only one on that stage tonight. My girls were equally as amazing so where is their video shoot?” Truthfully, he couldn’t argue with you there and he understood why it came off a bit shady but there was another part he hadn’t told you. Merely chuckling, Erwin leaned over against a nearby stand. “I agree, everyone has done so wonderful. But simply put..you’re our client and the group as a collective, is not. Truth is, we want to get the ball rolling on this as soon as tomorrow morning. The second he’s done here, he’ll be boarding a flight and headed to L.A and we hope you’ll join him. The way I see it, the more the merrier so if the other lovely ladies would like to tag along and star in the shoot, we’d be happy to have them. Whether you decide to invite everyone or do it on your own..you only have an hour to make your decision. We know it’s sudden notice so we’ll pay you quite amicably..twice as much as the club gig plus full expenses covered. We want to ensure you’re taken care of. So, does that sound like a deal?” after hearing those terms, your mind was all but made up! You had made a pretty good grip off of that club appearance plus the brand deals that followed after so to double that..you were game. Looking up at him, (y/n) flashed the big time executive a smile and assured him that not only would you be there but you’d have the rest of the crew with you. with that, the two of you parted ways for the time being. Leaving you to make a couple calls and get things in order. you couldn’t believe you had been presented with something like this and that this artist had requested you personally! It felt like such a huge honor. Although, it did beg the question….

who the hell was the rapper you’d be working with?! He never told you that part. Surely, it couldn’t have been EJ because he definitely would’ve said something or asked you himself. Which still left a handful of artists signed to them that could be performing tonight. Speaking of, the one person’s set you wanted to see was up next so you’d shoot a text to your group chat, telling all of them to call you immediately and that it was important.

hopefully, they'll answer on time and you could make a break back to the hotel to get packed and board that flight in less than an hour. You had never been on such a tight schedule but it was a sign of things to come you supposed.

maybe you were finally about to ascend into that next level. That your star would be rising a lot sooner than you thought. Now was no time for contemplation anyways. You had to go get this money!

a few moments later, your phone would begin ringing and it was Niesha calling. A complete shocker that she was the one to pick up. But it’s when you swiped over and the video connected, that you’d be greeted by all of their drunken, smiling faces. “(Y/NNNN), hey bookie. What’s wrong?” Niesha, slightly slurring her words as loud music and lights thumped behind her in the background. It seemed like they were having a good time and you hated to disturb that but this was important.

“Hey, listen. I know it’s soon but can y’all make it to the hotel in an hour? I just got us a good ass gig. They said they’ll fly us out—“

however, before you could finish your little rundown, you were interrupted by the sounds of faint groaning. “C’monnn, (y/n). We just got done working. Take a break for a little bit. You’re gonna run yourself in the ground, baby.”

now normally, your best friend never led you astray or gave you some dumb advice but with this much riding on it, you were not trying to hear that bullshit! “Y’all, I’m serious. The man from my talent agency just offered me a spot in a music video and said that if we can all be there, we can all be in it.”

even though you were speaking, there was no way she or anyone else was hearing you. Nor did they care to, honestly..that’s when the more level headed member Brianne jumped in and sounded off. It just wasn’t with the result you expected.

“(Y/N), listen..can’t believe I’m saying this but Niesha’s right. We need a break. You’ve been working real hard and so have we. It’s Rolling Loud weekend. It’s some good parties, go enjoy them and enjoy yourself. It can wait.”

“No, Bri. This can’t wait! Y’all, please. I’m trying to get us paid. You know imma break bread with y’all first.”

that’s when you’d see those pink curls step back into frame and that you were about to get unfiltered advice from the one who always gave it to you straight..

“(Y/N), baby. I’m sorry. I’m sure it’s cool and a legit offer and all but we have three performances in the next month that you have us booked for. You gotta give yourself some time to rest and have fun. Bitch, life is too short to be working all the time. What good is some money if you ain’t here to spend it?” She had a good point and you hated it..but still…you had to take the chance!

“Nieshaaaa, don’t do this.”

“I’m not doing nothing. You know I’m right..”

just then, you’d see another person enter the frame and they were calling for Niesha..pulling her into a bunch of kisses and gently grabbing her waist when they did. “I’ve been looking for you.” And she looked thrilled to see them too. It was the blonde dude from earlier and it was safe to assume she had been doing more than ‘talking’ to him.

“Girl, as you can see I’m kinda busy. Imma call you later, bitch. Byeee.”

before you could stop her, she’d disconnect the line and you were left looking dumbfounded…that was utterly pointless. There was no way you’d get them all corralled and of coherent mind in an hour. As they were right now, they’d do nothing but give Pole Assassins and yourself a bad rap.

letting out a deep sigh, you’d regroup and cut to plan b; taking this gig solo! You wanted to share this with them but you couldn’t beg four grown women to act right. Besides, they had been going hard and you admittedly had been pushing them so maybe they had earned a break, even if you didn’t want one.

just then, your never ending train of thought was derailed by the sounds of loud screaming and chants. Along with that same voice that had you swooning not too long ago.

“Rolling Loud, make some fucking noise!”

EJ’s set had already begun and you didn’t want to miss a single second. It was very rare that he’d even make an appearance and judging by the volume of those shrieks, everyone shared the same sentiment. Rushing over to a nearby tv screen streaming the performance, you’d see him moving across, hype as ever and completely in his element.

one of his newest singles that had been making its rounds was his first track and of course, you knew every word. He left you in awe every single time. That’s when another realization crossed your mind and crushed you all the same…

the two of you had plans! Plans to hang out and hopefully get to know one another better..something you had been looking forward to but obviously, work came first. You couldn’t just abandon such a big opportunity for a man, not even someone as famous as him.

not only would it just be utterly stupid but you’d be a grade A hypocrite as well. Soon, your smile began to fade and the excitement you felt listening to his voice faded to white noise. Right now, sticking around wasn’t an option. You’d only further hurt your own feelings, thinking about someone who was nothing more than an acquaintance to you and time was getting shorter. This was far more important.

taking one final glance back at the screen, you’d then shoot off to grab your things. You could make it back to the hotel in about ten minutes, get your things packed and meet them in the lobby before time was even up. You wanted to show the agency you were serious about building your brand. Anything else would have to wait..

“I’m sorry, EJ. I’m sure you, of all people, understand what it’s like. I’m sure we’ll kick it again soon but right now, I gotta go.”

══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿════✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°

12:35am, departing from Miami International Airport

Just as Mr. Smith had promised, you found yourself boarding the steps of the private Boeing 747 jet a little after midnight. For a while, you’d be saying goodbye to Miami and headed to the second infamous Sunshine State.

what awaited you was a mystery, as it’d be your first time doing a music video. Not only that but starring in one as well. All of these huge opportunities are coming your way and yet, you couldn’t help but feel a bit of anxiety and guilt. You knew that it was of no fault of your own that your girls chose to stay behind but you weren’t the type to switch up on the people you started with just because of a little bit of money. But now wasn’t the time to sit and contemplate your decisions. You had to go into work mode and get your mind right. Once you made it to the top step and onto the mahogany carpets of the plane, you were greeted by two faces you had only seen in pictures and friendly gestures. “So you did make it..man, I’m so glad.”

it was none other than rapper Prince Cee, aka Connie Springer. He, along with the man sitting across from him, Onya The God, were both a part of the same collective as EJ and were super talented. You were a fan of their whole group and couldn’t believe that it was him requesting that you be in his video. Although you hadn’t been formally introduced, neither of them had a problem standing up to greet you with a giant hug. Dressed in all of their designer clothes, chains swinging from around their necks and smelling like Baccarat cologne, you couldn’t help but shudder a bit..was this man and his whole crew this fine?!

“Well don’t be a stranger, lil mama. Go ahead and get comfortable, we got a long flight and I know you probably tired.” and he’d be correct. After being in seven inch stilettos for nearly an hour, twirling nearly twenty feet in the air, exhausted would be an understatement. How your girls had the energy to go party after performing, was insane. But you’d accept Onya’s offer and take the third seat across from them. You had only been on a few planes in your lifetime but this was nothing like you had ever seen. Red leather seats that resembled sofas, foot rests, silver buckets housing unopened bottles of champagne and a spread of delicacies that they were more than happy to share. just then, you’d hear the pilot signaling for takeoff and you’d feel the plane began to lift up.

“Yeah. I appreciate you guys inviting me for this..I honestly can’t believe it.”

“Ain’t no problem, baby. You was our first pick when they asked us. We know it was a little bit late to but we happy you decided to come.”

Connie, who was in the midst of opening some champagne, poured you all a glass once the fluid fizzled out. After such a successful performance and the beginning of his album rollout, he was going to enjoy this tiny break and celebrate to his heart's content. Just for the occasion, he had been given a new chain that was currently laced around his neck.

meanwhile, you sat cross legged away from the two gentlemen, taking a bite of some snacks before engaging in the conversation. “What about your homegirls though? They didn’t want to come?”

to which you’d simply shake your head as you sipped your drink. “They had something else they were working on so they couldn’t make it.” Not wanting to let these strangers in on their laxed attitude and refusal to show. You didn’t hold it against them. If they wanted to rest and play, that was fine by you. But nothing was going to stop your grind.

“That’s too bad. Would’ve loved to had the whole crew but we gone have fun, promise. If it’s anything we can do to make you feel comfortable or make it easier, just let us know. We wanna take care of you.”

if it were one thing you were incredibly grateful for, it was these guys’ kind hospitality. You were admittedly a little scared to take this leap alone but you didn’t have to be so closed off. They were like coworkers; employed under the exact same talent agency as yourself but to them?

“Yeah, we like family now!” Connie, who had raised his glass to propose a toast on behalf of yourself, their performance and the pending success of the album. Prompting both you and Onya to follow suit. You were so excited for what was to come. There was a nine hour trek to California so it was best to become friendly.

the three of you eventually began talking, drinking, listening to music and just having a good time. They were both so respectful and nice. Complete opposite of what the media portrayed of their personas. They asked about your pole dancing, told you how crazy you guys’ dance went and that they’d love to have you on stage with them some time. it made you feel so much better about things and that you felt as if you made the right decision. However, it wasn’t until he brought up a mutual acquaintance that the guilt kicked right back in.

it was when you asked about what type of concept he was going for in the shoot and what to expect that it came about..

“Well we just wanted this shit to look like one big party..cameos from all our friends…have some pretty women slide through. Just have fun. We even tried to get EJ in it but his ass don’t even know how to just relax and play.”

EJ! The same EJ you had just stood up without so much as a word! How the hell could you have forgotten that he had just invited you out.

taking a hard swallow, (y/n) tossed the remainder of your champagne down your throat and kept your eyes focused on the two of them, so as not to appear nervous. You were incredibly frustrated with yourself right now. “EJ was going to be in the video?”

“That’s what we had planned. We asked him to get on this flight with us and come out but he said he had something more important to do. That he had plans tonight and tomorrow.”

right then, your heart damn near sank..you were almost certain said plans were hanging out with you and selfishly, you just abandoned them to chase a dollar. Could’ve at least had the courtesy to apologize but with you all thirty thousand feet in the air, you doubted any correspondence would make it through to him at this altitude.

the best you could do was perform some damage control when you landed and try to apologize. But with someone like him, excuses probably didn’t mean much. He struck you as the type of person who was very strict in his boundaries and you had once, maybe twice as best to do him dirt before dismissing you altogether.

“I’m telling you, that man don’t know nothing but work. Only way he’ll pop out at a club is if they pay him. He won’t do parties, it’s always serious with his ass.” Connie expressed as he rubbed the back of his neck, seemingly uncomfortable with his friend’s behavior.

“Is it that bad?” Pretending to be oblivious to his behavior, even though you witnessed and heard it from his mouth firsthand. Chuckling as you took a bite of a strawberry.

“He wouldn’t even let me record on the first day because I showed up five minutes late and he hated the song! Kicked me out and told me don’t come back until I had something better.”

now you couldn’t help but laugh a bit because he himself had told you that he didn’t play when it came to recording and producing for people. He hated having his time wasted and he said from his own admission: “I won’t put my name on some bullshit. I refuse. Waste my time with some dumbass song and I’ll put you out.”

it would take only one conversation to realize how much of a no nonsense person he was. So it came as no surprise that he didn’t want to participate in this. As to why he didn’t want to go to his little friend’s get together and why he preferred to chill with one person. Which made you feel all the more worse because he looked so excited to hang out.

“Don’t worry, he’s not as bad as you think. He’s actually pretty cool when you get to know him. He just stays to himself and don’t really be with all the drama. Would be nice to see his ass relax though. Be making me fucking nervous..gone fuck around and have a heart attack before he turns thirty.”

Onya, shaking his head as he drank the remainder of his glass. It seemed that these dudes cared deeply for Eren, as your friends did for you. When they told you to take it easy, they meant it from a place of love. Not of laziness..maybe when you got back to Miami, you’d take some time off and possibly get a rain check for your ‘date’. That’s if he’d even talk to you again!

for now, you’d enjoy the venture through the skies and the remainder of your long night.

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meanwhile, a blacked out sedan transporting the Grammy award winning rapper was slowly peeling from the parking lot of the arena when it was bum rushed by a bunch of rabid fangirls. “We love you, EJ!” “Marry me!” Could be heard from behind the glass as Eren attempted to ignore it. This was all but inevitable every time he made a public appearance. Hence why he preferred to stay home! He had just finished up his surprise headline performance and it was every bit of the amazing experience everyone knew it would be.

he had ‘crashed’ his friends’ performance, coming out during him and Prince Cee’s joint song..only to steal the show and finish out the night with a few of his own tracks.

somehow, it always ended like this. Him chasing women off with a stick and not being interested in the slightest. “You’re a lucky man, Mr. Jaeger. Not many people can say they have women chasing them down the street.” Currently, he was sitting spread legged in his seat, nonchalantly igniting his blunt as his assistant chimed off.

he wasn’t concerned about them at all. Half of them just hopeless groupies; probably married or had a man and was hoping he’d snatch them up instead. It wasn’t uncommon for artists to hook up with fans but he’d never do such a thing and cross that boundary. Besides, he didn’t want something everyone else could have.

“Mhm. If you say so.” He really wasn’t in the mood to entertain anyone right now. Except the one person he had invited out..yet, when he left, there was no sign of (y/n) anywhere. He assumed that you’d be waiting for him backstage or in his dressing room. Perhaps it was wishful thinking of a dynamic that didn’t really exist between you two like that.

maybe he had been a bit too forward with inviting you to kick it with him..seeing that he was visibly annoyed, his faithful assistant Floch tried to change the subject.

“So Mr. Springer has already left to shoot his video, he told me that he wished you would’ve joined them but he knew you’d probably decline..” as he was rambling, Eren just peered down at his phone, mindlessly scrolling at nothing..hoping he’d get a response from the one person he wanted to hear from. Not paying him any attention until he said something that piqued the artist’s interest.

“They left with some girl who’s supposed to be the lead. She was stunning too..I seen Mr. Smith from the talent agency talking to her. I think she was one of those pole dancer girls from earlier.” Just then, his head rose up slowly and he’d shoot him a glare.

“What did you say?” And by his tone, Floch became terrified because he wasn’t sure if he had something wrong.

“I—uh, just saw Mr. Smith talking to her. Apparently Mr. Springer asked her to be in his video so she left.”

“What’s her name? The redhead suddenly shifted in his seat; he had to think about it for a moment but just then it clicked as he recalled seeing a name inscribed on the back of her jacket.

“(Y-y/n)..I believe.”

just then, he felt a feeling that had never registered with him before..was this sadness? Jealousy?…less known over a woman?! He barely even knew this chick and here he was getting possessive and upset that she left to go be in a music video with one of his friends.

and he knew Floch wasn’t saying any of this to be condescending or funny because he had no idea about the little bond that had formed or the rumors that were circulating. He was a true professional to his core and made it his mission to stay out of his boss’ private affairs.

however, Eren was losing his mind a little. On one hand, if he became irate, it’d give away the fact that he had developed a bit of a crush on the influencer. On the other, he couldn’t believe that Connie would ask for you specifically, especially when he was somewhat aware of what went down.

“..I see.” nodding his head and glaring aimlessly from the window. Letting a smirk crack across his lips eventually..hell, all he could do now was charge it to the game and go on about his business. No time to be jealous or get in his feelings. Instead… “Hey Floch. Set me up a flight to Atlanta. First thing in the morning.” For now, he had to get you off his mind and he knew just the way how.

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page break and time skip

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“Beautiful! Love it, guys.” the voice of the video director echoed through a megaphone at studio set six. You all had just finished out the remainder of the music video you were shooting. Things were wrapping up and it was yet another task you could check off your goal list. Saying you were the star of a music video was going to be huge.

“Aye, (y/n). That was perfect. Thank you so much, beautiful.” “Yeah, you did your thing, ma. We appreciate you.”

the two gentlemen you had attended with came over and greeted you with giant hugs as a show of their gratitude. It had been a few days since you touched down in Los Angeles and it was nothing like you had pictured. Then again, you were here partaking in work rather than leisure. You were behind studio walls instead of walking Rodeo so naturally, it all looked different. But it wasn’t all too bad.

plus, with the hefty paycheck that Mr. Smith had deposited to you, you had no complaints!

“No, thank you both for inviting me. This has been so much fun and I can’t thank you enough for the opportunity.”

needless to say, the shoot was a success. It involved a pool party, riding a motorcycle and you even dancing on Prince Cee’s lap. And you couldn’t lie..it had been a hell of a long time since you’d had a man grip your waist like that so you enjoyed that part a little too much! It’d be a shock for sure when it was finally released to the world to see yourself being felt up by him.

but this was just business and nothing beyond it. People do that all the time. Once they finish all the editing, it’d be released later this week, along with two new songs from the duo and you were so excited for both of them. You had no doubt that his album would be a huge hit. You were truly rooting for them.

“It’s all good. Like we said, we family now and you did us a big favor. Let us take you to dinner tonight and show you around. I know you said you ain’t never been out here before so we gotta take you to one of the best spots out here.”

“I’d really like that, y’all. Thank you so much.”

with that, plans for the evening had been set in motion. It would be nice to actually get out and enjoy LA before you had to leave..and who knew the next time you’d be able to visit? It was around seven at night over here on the west coast and you couldn’t help but wonder how your girls were spending their night. You had heard from them earlier in the form of a FaceTime call..all of them congratulating you on the video and saying they couldn’t wait to see it. meanwhile, they had been partying nonstop. Sailing on yachts, going to clubs and Niesha was being pampered by her little producer boyfriend. You were truly happy for them and loved to see their smiles.

but you also couldn’t help but to think about how a certain someone was doing. The second you touched down, you sent Eren a text apologizing for standing him up. Explaining that it wasn’t intentional but you had a job come up and if he were still interested in hanging out once you got back to Florida, you’d love to.

however, it went unanswered and you felt terrible. He wasn’t like everyone else nowadays. You couldn’t go stalk his social media or see what he was up to because he was so tight lipped about his life. Which you couldn’t fault him for at all but it didn’t stop you from worrying. You guys were constantly texting and even talked on the phone. Per your last conversation, you seemed fairly close but maybe he was mad at you. Someone like him didn’t put too much stake in people so you were probably not even on his mind now.

which sucked to think about…because he was a lot of fun. He made you laugh and not to mention, his playful flirting invoked feelings in you that hadn’t ever been there with anyone else. You saw his comments he had left on your last video from Rolling Loud and it made you laugh a little. “👀 damn.” Because the two of you knew it was a troll but everyone else was scrambling to make him out to be a simp.

“Alright, everyone! Thanks so much for your hard work. We’ll see you all next time.”

with that, the entire crew gave themselves a round of applause and proceeded to clear out of the set room. You’d probably head back to your hotel, get changed and grab a late night dinner at one of these lofty, upscale restaurants with the two guys. However, nothing could have prepared you for what was really about to take place when you made it back to your room and retired for the evening. Things were about to get much more heated than you expected.

two hours later…

it was nearly ten o'clock when you finally made it back to the Chateau Marmont; one of the city’s finest resorts and where you had been resting these past few days. It was beautiful..rich with history and decor. It was an absolute haven and although you were enjoying all of the amenities it had to offer, you were most looking forward to being swaddled up in the comfortable bed. Having settled in for the evening, (y/n) began removing your makeup and getting ready for bed. Connie and Onya were nice enough to treat you to a five star dinner, letting you order whatever you wanted and being all around gentlemen.

but it was as you were putting your hair up that you’d see your phone ringing and it was a FaceTime call.. “..at this time of night?” Questioning as you went to accept the call with a furrowed brow and confused expression on your face. Still, you were more than happy to see it!

“Eren..what a nice surprise!”

“I could say the same. Didn’t think you’d pick up, honestly.”

on the other end was the one person you had been hoping to hear from. It’d be nearing a little after one am on the east coast so he must’ve really wanted to talk to you. As always, he was facing a blunt, taking the roll between his pretty lips and lying in bed, shirtless. He had that exhausted drawl and deep tone that you’d heard the first time around. “Well I was just getting ready for bed. Just got back from dinner so I’m ready to lay down.”

smirking at your response before blowing another cloud from that spliff. You hated how attractive he made everything look! Including the facial hair he was starting to grow out and his long locks cascading around his face. However, you couldn’t help but feel a bit of guilt..you just disappeared on the man without so much as a word the other night and here you were pretending nothing had happened!

“I don’t blame you. How’s LA?” The words felt condescending because of your own conscious eating away at you. You ended up confessing that you took the flight in your text and that you were sorry but maybe he hadn’t forgiven you for that. A pang in the pit of your stomach resonated and you were growing nervous. “It’s pretty nice. Can’t complain, honestly.” “I’m glad to hear that.” His words trailing off as he lazily eyed you up and down yet again. He always did have a habit of doing so when you were in his view. As sexy as you were, he couldn’t help it.

eventually, you couldn’t take the tension and addressed the elephant for yourself. “Yeah..listen, I’m sorry about the other day. I didn’t mean to dip on you like that. They just asked me so quick that I—“but your explanation was quickly halted by a hand into the camera. Truth was, he didn’t care. You didn’t owe him any sort of answer. He was not your man nor was he the one paying your bills so that bag came first. He understood that better than anyone..

“Why are you telling me? I’m not mad at you, mama. You did what you had to do.”

widening your gaze, you’d be taken aback by his reaction. Most guys would’ve been feeling a way or swearing that you were on some sneaky shit..even if you weren’t dating! Hence why you strayed from relationships. But this man was much different! “You’re not upset?…but I— “but you what? Done your job?”

when he put it that way, he made you realize how silly it sounded. Leaning up into the camera as you walked back to your bed, Eren glared directly at you. “I’ll be honest..had you picked hanging out with me over something like this, I probably would’ve never spoken to you again and I’m being serious. Besides, you did the little bald bastard a favor so don’t feel bad.”

still, his statement was so matter of fact that you couldn’t help but laugh a little! “Wait? Why not?” But the answer was simple. It was such a pet peeve, among many other ticks of his when women would rather cling on to him for a come up, rather than make her own way. And vice versa. That’s why he fucked with you so heavily. He saw your work ethic and it was so sexy. It was so attractive how you maneuvered and handled your business. Also, he knew your homegirls were back in Miami partying with his best friend so the fact that you made this trip alone was commendable.

in fact, he was glad you did so he could finally get the one on one time he had been craving..he would’ve never been able to do so with four other women running around. What you didn’t know, was that he too had made a little trip himself: to Atlanta to help out with another friend’s project. Who was ironically beefing with the man who you had just shot a video with! It was amusing to him because the disagreement wasn’t even serious and having to record these two idiots throwing slams at each other in a track over something so trivial was hilarious.

that and he was a bit salty with Connie for nabbing you away. Especially when he had some things he wanted to say to you..preferably in person but it’d have to do right here..

“Well you know me..I gotta get mines. But I promise the second I’m back in Dade, imma come see you. I might take a little break so I’m gonna need you to help me relax.”

hearing you say those words invoked something in him..feelings he had been all but trying to conceal. But there was no need. It was obvious that tensions were boiling over between you two and there were only so many subtle innuendos you could throw before someone got the hint…

inhaling once more, Eren laid back against his pillows, raising the phone a bit and you were angled to where your head (and exposed chest) were sitting upright; amply cupped in that tank top you had on. (Y/N) was hoping to play it coy because you didn’t want to appear as easy but hearing his voice again and having these talks..you couldn’t help but to feel some level of intimacy. It was a bit forward for just a friendship but it wasn’t as if you two were even remotely close to a relationship either.

so what exactly was this?…why did you feel so comfortable with him? Why did you want to be more open than you already were….

you’d have your answer shortly when the topic got a bit more escalated. “Shit, you’re not by yourself. I mean, I’m up in Atlanta at the moment but for sure..I got you, gorgeous. We’ll have to link.” That tone causing tingles up your spine again. Truthfully, you had been drinking a bit and having pent up, unreleased feelings were getting to you.

moving a hand down to your stomach, you’d toil with the thin material as he watched you through the camera. Eventually watching his own disappear downward. It was crazy how much sexual frustration and attraction the two of you were harboring right now. Yet, neither of you wanted to make the first move! Was it respect? Shame? Worry that the other might not view you the same afterwards? Still, he had to go for it because he had been waiting days to see that pretty face again and it didn’t help when you posed the question:

“..I’m down. So what you tryna do?” Almost as if you two were playing a game of chess and you had just set the pieces in motion for him to make his move. Almost as if you were hoping he’d take the bait and initiate this intimate moment.

“What you mean?”

“When I get back. What you got in mind?”

furrowing your brow and biting at that lower lip so gently, (y/n) waited patiently for what he had to say. And it’d be an unexpected answer. Peering over his shoulder once as to not make sure anyone was around, Eren stared back at you; glazed, glossed over green eyes barely even open but he was looking right through you and knew what you both needed.

“I mean, if we being real..we don’t even have to wait. Cause I’ll tell you what I want right now.” Closed mouths didn’t get fed in his opinion. It was obvious that you weren’t scared or acting all innocent so why should he? Why should he hold back on how he felt about you? So another man could come swoop you away when he obviously wanted you so bad? Hell no. Instead, he’d make certain that even though you were miles and states apart, EJ the Don would be the only one on your mind for days to come!

“Talk to me then.” Slickly setting the stage for him to get his sentiments off of his chest. “Tell me what’s on your mind, sweetheart..”

his lips cracked into a faint smile at the mention of the moniker, licking his tongue around them before he focused on you again. “I already told you, baby. I don’t do rumors and I don’t bite my tongue..”

you hadn’t felt anything like this before. Someone who wasn’t afraid to tell you exactly what he wanted. “What if we quit all the playing and did what was on both of our minds?..cause I’ve been thinking ‘bout you like crazy..” the more he spoke, the more you craved this man. The urge to say the hell with morals and touch yourself to the sound of his sexy voice. Which was the exact goal!

“And what would you say if I told you I wanted you just as bad..would you hold it against me?” “When I want to fuck the shit out of you? Not at all..”

just then, a pang would catch in the pit of your stomach and you’d begin to part your legs slightly. That alcohol was working its way through your body and going straight to your pussy so if that’s what he was on, you’d meet him right there!

not to mention that he got out of his head when he was high so he wasn’t responsible for what he said right now. Both of your views were jolting a bit as you shifted around in the sheets; (y/n) massaging your own breasts as you popped them from your shirt and Eren grasping at his covered crotch, that wouldn’t stay that way though because when you began whispering those sweet nothings to him through that speaker, you’d have this man acting out of character and coming out of his clothes. And vice versa..

“Then I guess I can tell you that I wanted to fuck on you the first night. That I would’ve let you get this pussy if you asked for it..” moaning softly into the mic whilst letting your idle hands scale your bare skin. Those thin panties hanging at your waistline by now…and your fingers dancing across that aching clit and slippery folds.

you proceeded to tell him all the things you wanted him to do when you made it back into town. Including letting him eat you out until you came all over his face, how you wanted to look him in his eyes while you suck it slow and even rub up on his chest while you rode him. All of which had him jerking himself off from the other end. When he readjusted the camera, you could see his fingers cradled around his swollen cock and to no surprise, he was big! Longer and thicker than anyone you had ever seen..thinking about all of that being inside of you had you frothing in more ways than one. And when you’d see him pump that pre-ejaculsting tip appear in your view as he swiped it with his thumb..(y/n) sank your fingers inside of that tightness. Putting it in the perfect position for him to watch you finger yourself. but you weren’t alone. Having come completely undone, Eren let out a gently grunt, even laughing because you were exactly the type of woman he had been waiting for! A freak in private but about her business in public? Perfect..and now it was his turn for confessions.

“Shit…damn, baby. Well since we’re being honest. I’m fucking you on sight. Putting my tongue all over that pretty body…I swear I’m giving you all this dick..” finding yourself whimpering at his words as you closed your eyes and imagined the scenario. He talked you through it so well and you just knew things would be even better had you been in his bed. “You look so good playing with that pussy..you that wet for me?” Teasing as he heard your sweet cries and sloshing wetness. It was so sloppy; dripping with arousal, all due to thoughts of him.

“Y-yeah..this all you.”

“And those titties..they’re so fucking pretty. God, I want you so bad.”

admitting through heavy huffs as his pumping grew faster. The two of you went back and forth, exchanging filthy words and freaky thoughts until neither of you could stand the swelling pressure any longer. “F-fuck! Imma come..” letting out from behind those hotel room walls and hoping no one heard him yelping like a little bitch, Eren raised his back from the mattress as he stroked himself into a mind numbing climax.

but just as he released everywhere, you followed shortly behind with your own squirt soaking those fingers and the sheets. Having full blown fucked yourself to tears! Needless to say, it had been a while since you’d came so it was a lot to come down from. The orgasms ripped though both of your bodies and left you trembling. Unashamed and unabashedly reveling in that afterglow together. But once your favorites met yet again, he’d give you that warming smile and the realization hit as to what just happened.

both of you having exponentially increased your own highs. And not wanting to come down anytime soon. “I swear you’re trouble..goddamn.” But it was him that had awoken that sultry side. Making you act in ways that you never would have normally…and he’d keep it happening until neither of you could even stand anymore stimulation and nearly fell asleep. Having steamy, nasty phone sex for nearly an hour. It was an insane experience! Disheveled and discombobulated, you guys eventually had to hang up and get some rest. “Goodnight..sweet dreams.” Giving him a kiss into the camera. “Trust me, imma sleep very well..” Eren’s lids half shut and dimmed in pure bliss as he returned your peck.

once you both disconnected and bid adieu, (y/n) sat with those feelings and thoughts as you glared up at the ceiling. Who knew how this would lead up and where this left you two but one thing was for certain: things would never be the same!

.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*:｡.･*: .･*:｡.･*:｡.･

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luvth0t · 2 years

Text

ACQUAINTED ━ L.N

🕊 2k celebration 🕊

based off ‘acquainted’ by the weeknd

in which lando struggles to come to terms with his feelings for you due to his own and his friend’s better judgement, but his lust is too hard to ignore and you are too hard to quit.

warnings; lotta smut, confusing reader, max f is a reader hater :(, some angst, some fluff, the whole lot, swearing, mentions of alcohol, unprotected sex, oral, mentions of face fucking, mutual masturbation, phone sex, facetime sex, praise, degradation

baby you’re no good; cause they warned me ‘bout your type girl, i’ve been ducking left and right

baby you’re no good; think i fell for you, i fell for you, i fell for you

“i’m fucked.” lando muttered out in disbelief, legs spread and hands in his lap, wrapped around the beer bottle he was using to try take his mind off your figure in front of him. he wasn’t even a fan of alcohol, showed how desperate he had become.

it wasn’t even working. the crowd around him, the blonde sat opposite him, the pulsing music; no distraction was great enough.

“in too deep?” max chuckled from beside him, nudging his side as his eyes followed his gaze, although he didn’t need to look to know who his best mate was talking about.

lando only nodded, beer bottle coming up to his lips although he made no move to take a sip it as he let out a breath. every inch of him was aching to touch you, stand behind your swaying hips, have you in his grasp again.

“it’s the alcohol talking mate,” max dismissed, patting him on the shoulder supportively, lando still not sparing him a second glance as he now shook his head in certainty. lando knew damn well it wasn’t the alcohol, because the alcohol was meant to be getting you off his mind.

max raised an eyebrow at this, his lack of words, lack of acknowledgment. he really wasn’t joking huh.

“she’s no good for you i told you this,” max huffed out - losing sight of his joking tone, and this was what got lando’s attention on him, narrowed eyes sent his way in your defence.

“you barely know her.” lando was quick to huff, and max wanted to roll his eyes. he resisted though, also stopped himself from groaning as he realised just how far lando had fallen.

“what and you do?” max challenged, not backing down and it was lando’s turn to roll his eyes. well aware his best friend had his best interest at heart, he didn’t need another lecture about who to spend his time with.

“yes.” lando quickly assured, eyes falling back onto your care-free frame, lost in the music as you happily enjoyed yourself with a friend or two.

he knew you well enough. knew that you had a thing for his hands. knew where to curl his fingers inside of you to make you see stars. knew your favourite way to be fucked was from behind. knew where to kiss on your neck to get your breathing heavier.

“she wants a fuck. that’s it.” max couldn’t help but be brutally honest as he rested back in his seat, as if he was telling lando he wouldn’t be discussing it further. as if he had made the conclusion that couldn’t be denied.

but lando wasn’t accepting that.

“you’re full of shit.” lando tried to shrug it off, shaking his head. “and so what if she does? maybe that’s all i want too.” lando was quick to point out, taking a swing of his drink now to avoid any slip ups.

because he didn’t want that too. he wanted more from you. all of you.

“we both know that’s not true.” max scoffed, and lando didn’t bother replying. max wasn’t going to see where he was coming from, and lando definitely wasn’t going to take any of his advice.

he could look after himself.

it was almost on cue that you came sauntering over, and all plans of ignoring and avoiding you tonight had been forgotten ━ the mischievous smile and sparkle in your eyes having lando almost squirming in his seat in anticipation. the fact your eyes were on him excited him.

“this how you plan to spend your night?” you questioned playfully once your reached the table, oblivious to being the topic of conversation as you leant against the side of the booth lightly, only having eyes on the mclaren driver below you.

“he doesn’t dance.” max spoke up before lando could, the brit rolling his eyes again at his friends antics. ready to intervene and apologise for his rudeness which you had been on the receiving end of one too many times.

but your smile only grew, your eyes hadn’t left lando and it made his stomach flip. how unbothered you were, it should scare him. but god did it entice him more.

“i’ll teach you.” you grinned, ignoring max completely as your hand came to grab the wrist of the driver ━ tugging him to his feet with little resistance. “might get lucky.” you winked with a small giggle.

lando’s body was in autopilot the moment you touched him, drink placed down onto the table and arm quite happily draping over your shoulder, words exciting him as he raised a brow.

it was quite typical actually, because within 20 minutes he had your legs over his shoulders, thighs beside his head as his tongue explored your cunt while your fingers tugged on his hair, locked away in the bathroom.

“m’ gonna cum,” you whined ━ hips bucking against his mouth, never one to last long when he ate you out. he was godly with his tongue and you were obsessed, not as much as him though.

who would’ve thought lando could get off so easily by getting someone off, but with you that was certainly the case. getting a taste of you, hearing you moan and praise his efforts as he brought you to tears from pleasure had him hard and aching in his jeans.

“let go baby,” he breathed out, words just coherent as he barely let up on his efforts with his tongue, his fingers definitely leaving bruises on your soft skin as you rested against the mirror, cumming only a few moments later.

lando was sure to never miss the sight, few moments where he could convince himself you were his, all of you. the way your face contorted in pleasure and your eyes fluttered shut ━ dressed bunched up at your waist; yeah he was in too deep.

“fuck, always so good,” you whimpered as you brought your head back up to look down at him through hooded eyes, watching as he licked you clean ━ a smug smirk being sent your way before he stood up properly, hands moving to rest on top of your thighs now.

“needy tonight,” he pointed out as his large hands gave your thighs a squeeze, unable to ignore the fact it had been you that initiated everything; coincidentally the night he had intended on avoiding you.

you let out a small breath as you shrugged at his words, sitting up straight so you could touch him in some capacity, hands spreading over his shoulders.

“missed you.” you confessed with no shame, small smirk tugging on your lips now as you looked up at him. and the words had his hopes up too high, well aware you didn’t miss him like he missed you, but he still found it flattering. “haven’t stopped thinking about you inside me,” you sighed out; voice sounding whiny again as you leaned forward once more.

your lips barely brushed against his and he was letting out another deep breath, resisting the urge to ruin you right here on the spot. his lust shadowing the disappointment of you only missing him in bed.

“yeah?” lando asked in confirmation, hands sliding up your thighs now ━ eyes flickering to your lips desperately, his cocky grin definitely half fake but he was running with it, taking pride in your need for him in somewhat.

“mhm,” you nodded; hands locking behind his neck as his head ducked down to settle in the crook of your neck, pressing open mouth kisses on the skin.

you let out a sigh of content at the feeling, only encouraging him before his hands started to spread your legs again; that’s when you stopped him.

“not here,” you quickly spoke up ━ pressing your hands onto his chest, and he was quick to stop his actions, head lifting once more to look at you in question.

“no?” he spoke in slight confusion, only because it had never stopped the pair of you before. the sex between the pair of you happened in public settings more often than private.

first time he met you was at the british grand prix, where you ended up on your knees in his drivers room. club bathrooms, random rooms in mutual friends houses; he was rarely in the uk these days so when he was you were limited on time together.

“let’s go back to yours,” you suggested, and he was in no way going to say no when you were looking up at him with big eyes and pawing at his chest, although he was still slightly confused.

“might cum in my pants by the time we get there love,” he teased playfully; unaware if you were being serious ━ not wanting to give away the fact that having you in his bed here, not that it was his actual home, excited him.

you had giggled, the sound like music to his ears as you shook your head. “i won’t be able to walk out of this club if you fuck me here.” you told him, full intentions of spending all night with him. after he had been away for weeks you wanted nothing more.

there was too much to catch up on.

he couldn’t argue with that, and leaving the club with his arm around your waist felt anything but wrong; even with max’s disapproving glance burning into the back of his head.

he felt almost proud to be taking you home, not that he expected you to hang around in the morning. you were all over each other in the back of the cab, lando barely being able to mutter out his address before your lips were on his.

like drunken teenagers as you got out the car, sheepish ‘thank you’s’ before heading straight into his place.

lando had no issues as you two slowly but surely made your way to his room, clothes being discarded along the way ━ a trail leading straight to the bed, shoes were kicked off in a rush at the front door, his hands had peeled your dress off as you passed the kitchen ━ your hands managing to remove his shirt only moments later.

he’d almost lost control in the hallway, having you against the wall and your thighs squeezing around his knee he had used to spread your legs; he wanted to fuck you right there.

but following after you was no issue as you unclasped your bra and ran off to what you hoped was his room, laying back on the bed which could only be his.

he was a few steps behind, both your laughter ringing out the hall and his room before he caught sight of you. on his sheets, bottom lip between your teeth; he almost stopped breathing at the sight.

it was clear that your panties were soaked, your eyes practically pleading with him to join you, your body curving on his bed perfectly.

“are you going to fuck me or keep staring?” you smirked, sitting up slightly, propping yourself on your hands as you quirked an eyebrow ━ mouth almost watering at the sight of him there shirtless. tanned abdomen and chest, you wanted nothing more than to get your hands on him.

he had rolled his eyes, pretending as if he hadn’t been shamelessly staring as he joined you on the bed ━ settling between your legs as he crawled up towards you.

“should i make you beg for it?” the driver hummed out as his lips hovered over yours, clearly seeing yours curve upwards into a small smile as your hand moved to rake through his curls. “considering how desperate you already seem,” he pointed out ━ pushing you back so you were laying down fully.

it was ironic, lando was well aware he was the desperate one. despite you making all the moves tonight, he could not get any more needy for you and all of your attention.

“you’d like that wouldn’t you,” you shot right back, hand running up his arm which was holding himself up, nails scratching over his bicep lightly as you ensured to not break eye contact. “you’re taking too long.” you grinned, pushing him off of you and moving to straddle him instead.

lando easily could’ve held his ground, but having you climb on top of him was no reason to fight back ━ his hands folding behind his head as you made quick work in tugging his pants down.

he watched with parted lips as you jacked him off a couple times before you were sinking down onto his cock, the groan he let out almost sounding out the gasp that left your lips.

“there you go baby, show me how much you missed me,” lando rasped as you began to move your hips up and down, happily watching as your head fell back.

he was in awe, your tits bouncing as you did, your mouth wide open as your eyes fluttered shut ━ holding onto his torso as you moved, the whines and moans you made had him wanting to stay quiet, wanting to hear every noise you made.

“fuck━ so big,” you whined, still unable to adjust fully to his size which stretched you out, despite the amount of times having slept with him.

lando only hummed, allowing you to do the work and set the pace despite the urge to guide your hips with his hands, instead moving them to rest on your thighs.

he couldn’t help the cocky grin on his face, and it only grew when you lifted your head ━ looking down at him with a deep breath, a lazy smile being sent his way.

lando couldn’t comprehend the feeling, every time your eyes met his he felt his stomach drop. it wasn’t lust either, he couldn’t describe the feeling and he didn’t want to because it terrified him.

distracting himself was easy though when you pushed your hair over your shoulder and leaned down to kiss him once more.

like usual the night was incredible, hours spent going at it. he knew there was never room for disappointment when inside of you. but he felt almost stupid when the highlight was falling asleep with you still beside him.

waking up he was surprised once more, eyes opening as they adjusted to the light, his arm quickly raising to shield them ━ knocking your frame on the way.

you were still here. of course you were. ha. take that max.

he was suddenly wide awake, eyes shifting onto you, your hair sprawled over his bare chest ━ curled up into his side, legs tangled with his. his arm had been around you, which he only now realised as you shifted and mumbled incoherent words.

“m’ sorry,” you mumbled, half asleep but well aware you were practically clinging to the driver. it hadn’t gotten to this stage, cuddled up in bed alongside him. the morning after.

lando felt panic when you tried to shift away, acting without thinking as his arm was quick to return to where it had been for most of the night; around you, pulling you back to his side.

“don’t apologise,” he whispered ━ shamelessly admiring you, your eyes still shut he didn’t have room to care if you knew he was staring or not. not when your lips curved upwards at his words, watching as you got comfortable once again and let out a hum of content.

lando couldn’t help but smile either, a false sense of hope as you laid in his arms. max’s words were still ringing in his mind; all his doubts about you. he wasn’t alone either, many of his friends had subtly told him you wouldn’t ever want more with him. that you could not handle his lifestyle.

but right now lando felt like sending them all photo of his current position with the middle finger, a small but certain step to prove them wrong.

lando made the most of the silence, while you slowly waked up. well he was unsure actually, but he didn’t care if you were fast asleep still or not. he could stay like this all day.

“you didn’t tell me you were here,” your words came out soft, moving onto your stomach so you could look up at him, chin propped on his chest. he was confused, eyes focusing back down on you, admiring your current state.

always admiring you, in your little dresses in the club, skirts and blazers in the paddock, your even shorter skirts when you all went to play golf; but this one was his favourite. tired eyes, messy hair and swollen lips, marks from his finger tips decorating your neck, matching ones sure to be left all over the rest of your body only being covered by the sheets.

“hm?” lando hummed out, realising he hadn’t processed nor answered your question ━ fingers absentmindedly running through your hair. he would’ve felt guilty, but the giggle you let out had him smiling sheepishly.

fuck. there it was again. that feeling. as if a light had flashed in the room, a quick hit to the heart and stomach from such little sounds and actions.

god what were you doing to him.

“you didn’t tell me you were back,” you repeated; raising an eyebrow this time, although the question would seem accusing it wasn’t ━ softly spoken as your fingers traced on his skin.

lando realised what you meant, reminded once more of how screwed he was. he hadn’t texted you he was in england like he had every other time, hadn’t called for a necessary reunion ━ having every intention to avoid you.

lasted three days, but here he was and he was not one bit mad about it. only thing that angered him was that he even listened or gave into the doubts that was being put in his head by his mates.

“i didn’t know you wanted me to tell you,” was the only thing lando could come up with, cringing immediately at what he was saying; seeming to lose all train of thought with you peering up at him.

he watched as you laughed, not at all phased by his statement which he regretted, unsure how you’d take it ━ he didn’t want you to think he wasn’t keen.

he was so keen. he was realising it more and more every moment, especially right now. he wanted to find himself here every day, you tucked under his arm ━ he wanted to keep you here, never let you go.

“i want you to tell me.” you replied through a smirk, rolling your eyes ━ speaking as if you were pointing out the obvious, which had him internally cursing himself once more. but then the realisation and confession that you wanted to know when he was in the uk dawned on him.

your giggle rang through his ears again when he failed to reply, his cheeks heating. fuck sake. he was making a fool of himself.

“am i reading this wrong?” you hummed out, raising an eyebrow as your fingers brushed over his jaw. you didn’t even sound concerned, confident that you weren’t ━ well aware lando was hooked on you.

it showed. you were not one bit bothered by his silence or lack of reassurance, your expectant eyes telling him you already knew where he was at. but still he was eager to reassure you.

“no, no,” he rushed out ━ busying himself with his fingers which were running up and down your back, a sheepish smile forming on his face as you grinned. “i’ll tell you… when i’m here.” the brit tried to conclude, a nod for certainty to go with it.

there it was again, your laugh. that feeling again, a smile forming on his face and he couldn’t do anything about it.

“only if you want to,” you winked ━ leaning up and pressing a short kiss to his lips, and if he wasn’t confused enough he was then left to watch as you wiggled out of his grasp and lifted to your feet.

he wanted to. he wanted everything.

you got me putting time in, time in; nobody got me feeling this way,

you probably think i’m lying, lying; i’m used to bitches comin’ right way

“what do you mean you’re here?” max’s voice rang through the sound system of lando’s car, sounding way too suspicious and confused for his own liking.

“they want me at the factory for a couple days.” lando lied swiftly, hands working around the steering wheel as he kept his eyes on the road. “was thinking we could do some quadrant stuff too,” he added ━ in an attempt to shift max’s focus onto something they could both happily talk about.

but the unsatisfied hum his best friend let out showed lando he wasn’t at all convinced.

“you couldn’t have gone to the factory a couple weeks ago?” max was quick to sass, unable to wrap his head around the fact that he was here again. he had a pretty good idea as to why though.

“no.” lando was too quick to reply, sounding incredibly defensive. because he was lying, he could’ve gone two weeks ago. he wasn’t needed now. he volunteered to come.

“this has nothing to do with a certain━” max started to ask, and lando rolled his eyes the moment he figured out what max was asking. what he was implying.

“no.” he repeated, speaking through a huff ━ lying through his teeth once more.

okay maybe being back here was something to do with you, maybe he wanted to see you again without waiting a month or two. maybe he was sick of just having casual sex when it was convenient.

“where are you right now?” max was blunt, ignoring his denial which he didn’t believe for a second.

lando stayed quiet, the sound of indicator filling the silence as he turned down your street; almost feeling guilty as he did so. he had no reason to feel guilty however, he had no reason to listen to max and his pointless advice.

“seeing… friends,” lando trailed off ━ his lie more a method of stalling, not even bothering in trying to sound convincing as your apartment complex came into view; suddenly he was eager to get max off his phone.

“my god lando,” max breathed out in disappointment, lando rolling his eyes again ━ refraining from defending himself.

max didn’t know shit.

“i gotta go,” lando ignored, parking up out front and already his mind was elsewhere. on you; getting you under his fingertips again, having your pretty eyes on him again.

everything seemed to be about you these days.

“you’re flying from country to country for a hookup?” it was max’s turn to ignore lando’s words, but all it did was hurry lando up in ending the call, words going in one ear and out the other.

“see you later,” lando spoke happily before hanging up ━ a breath of relief let out afterwards before he was climbing out the car.

he checked his phone for your flat number once more which you had sent in the text, and he was on his way up in no time. he felt weird, excited and somewhat terrified.

max’s words now lingering. okay he definitely was going to extreme lengths to see you, but how else were things meant to progress?

time had never moved so slow as he rang the bell, standing there felt like forever considering he wasn’t sure if this was even your place. he had never felt so anxious, like a teenager in high school again.

but then you opened the door, grin on your face and suddenly he felt fine. of course he did; you seemed to make everything fine. everything feel better than it ever had before.

“why are you here?” you practically beamed, no hesitation in throwing your arms around him as you brought him in for a hug ━ tugging him inside. you were ecstatic from the moment he texted you a few hours ago saying he was in town.

“wanted to see you,” lando couldn’t help but admit as his arms wrapped around your waist ━ being met with a flattered smile before you pressed your lips against his, surprising him in the best way possible.

just a hookup. yeah right.

“liar,” you scoffed as you pulled away ━ in no way believing he was here for you, but you’d take his company while he was here, arms remaining linked around his neck as you watched him raised his eyebrows.

“i’m not lying.” lando laughed, almost hesitant with his words but he couldn’t bring himself to lie, even if he should; unsure if he was being too forward but considering your greeting this was just fine.

you were happy to see him.

you studied his face for a few moments, realising he was being serious ━ another laugh leaving your lips as you shook your head.

“you’re here in england so i can suck your dick?” you confirmed playfully, still expressing doubt as you guided the pair of you to the hallway, not getting far as your back hit the wall ━ bringing him with you to keep him close.

lando couldn’t deny the small ache in his chest from your assumption he only wanted to fuck, but he played it off ━ eyes rolling in a joking manner as he scoffed, hands resting comfortably on your waist. having you against the wall wasn’t the worst way for this to go.

“you should cut yourself some credit - there’s more to you than your mouth.” lando hummed teasingly, opting for the safer bet instead of opening the bottle of his feelings, which could easily pour out at any moment.

“mhm,” you nodded unconvinced ━ laughing once more before you were pulling him down for another kiss, lips meeting his roughly. you too had missed him, missed kissing him, touching him ━ feeling him. tasting him again was long overdue, despite time apart only getting shorter.

lando was well and truly sold on the fact he had made the right decision on coming all this way, choosing to spend his precious time here for you, the moment your lips were on his and your hands were in his hair.

he couldn’t get enough, hands tightening on your waist before sliding underneath your shirt, embracing the contact of your bare skin which shivered under his touch.

“i better make your trip worth it then hm?” you breathed out after a few moments, hand moving down to palm over his jeans causing the driver to take a sharp breath, eyes stuck on yours which were looking up at him innocently.

there was no time for him to speak, not when you were already crouching down, hands trailing to his belt as you got comfortable on your knees; smiling all the while of course.

“won’t be hard to do that princess,” lando mumbled under his breath as his head titled back when you freed his already hardening cock.

he was right, always right. you had made the trip well and truly worth it. the first night alone was more than enough, able to fuck you in your own home.

he found himself wanting to be able to say he made love to you in your own home; which absolutely terrified the driver because when has he ever wanted to make love? but he shrugged that thought off as quickly as it came.

waking up in bed with you, cuddled up to him once more had him grinning like an idiot. almost getting ahead of himself ━ but he put himself back in his place. he knew this was still just sex. the lack of conversation before hand made that clear. but he could do with just sex for now.

“i should head off; don’t want to be in your way,” lando had yawned after half an hour of cuddling and small talk, more so about the night before.

he had done a terrible impression of you screaming his name, which should’ve made you kick him out the bed although instead it had you in a fit of laughter.

“i’m not doing anything,” you had reassured him, which had him getting excited all over again. but he still felt like he was intruding. the lingering doubt that being here for you was too much, even though he could fine many excuses as to why he was in his home country.

“yeah but━” lando had started to excuse, but you had interrupted him, already knowing where he was going.

you read him better than you’d think, his overthinking was quite clear. you however saw it all as fun. lando was fun. talking to him, sleeping with him, cuddling with him, hanging out with your group of friends, hanging out alone; any situation so far has been fun.

no need to think any more of it.

“you’re here for me? right?” you smirked, moving to shift on top of him, the sheets clouding around the pair of you as you sat up a bit ━ thighs either side of his stomach, decorated by his large hands.

“well━ my other friends and family too,” lando added ━ avoiding your question because he had grown to regret his admission in the heat of the moment last night. you hadn’t seem to have forgot however.

“right.” you grinned, hands resting on his chest as you leaned down towards him. “but you have nowhere to be?” you reiterated, looking at him in expectance.

lando nodded his head, biting his tongue and pride; not that he had much when it came to you. although once more it all seemed worth it when your smile only grew.

“so stay.” you concluded simply, lips connecting with his before he could give you an answer.

because you knew. you knew if you told him to stay, he would.

i’ll keep on touchin’ on your body, i’ll keep on touchin’ on your body,

to say that we’re in love is dangerous, but girl i’m so glad we’re acquainted

three days in england was easily the best decision lando had ever made.

three days spent wrapped up with you, spent with your in all sorts of ways. while the sex had been incredible, had him feeling like he was living in some sort of paradise; the fact you two were eating meals together, shopped together; did normal things together. he couldn’t have asked for more.

it wasn’t weird, it didn’t feel weird. you two had built a friendship over the months through your mutual friends and nights together, but this drastic step to many hours together out of nowhere felt incredibly natural.

as if you two had been dating for months, as if you were a happy couple. as if lando didn’t need to disappear for four weeks in a couple days, as if you weren’t terrified of commitment.

it felt normal. it felt great. it was everything lando thought he wanted, and confirmed his thoughts in his feelings for you.

you didn’t question it, the circumstances unspoken of as he spent two which would now be three nights at yours ━ why question something that felt perfect?

lando had been questioned however, by max of course. who else. but he was incredibly proud to wake up both days, and tell max ‘yes i am still here,’ practically grinning ear to ear as he proved his friend wrong. as he proved his own doubts wrong; this was more than just sex.

you knew it as well. but unlike lando, you didn’t want to address that yet. while lando had slowly come to the realisation of his feelings for you, his want for more; you’d been suppressing those needs.

you knew damn well lando could satisfy you in one night, in this case three nights; but satisfy you every day? it wasn’t possible, not with who he is and what he does.

“you wanna cum again hm?” lando rasped as his hips snapped against your ass, your eyes rolling back as you gripped onto the kitchen counter tightly ━ the cool surface acting as refuge for your overheated body.

the pesto pasta over near the stove was long forgotten, it stood no chance when the brit’s hands began to wonder as he stood behind you while you tried to prepare some dinner.

not too long later and you’re bent over the counter, his shirt bunched up at your waist and your panties at your ankles, his name bouncing off the walls once more today.

“please,” you whined ━ only managing to speak when his hand tangled in your hair, tugging you up and causing your back to hit his chest as he held you against him; his lips finding home on your neck quickly.

you felt him chuckle against your skin, pounding into you mercilessly, sure to his that spot inside of you every time, your eyes fluttering shut as your body bounced with every thrust.

“greedy little slut, still wanting more,” he commented in a taunt, the words going straight to the heat between your thighs, well and truly on your way to what would be your fifth orgasm of the day. you weren’t even aware you could cum so much but hey, here you were.

“lando,” you whimpered ━ hand gripping onto his arm that had snakes around your waist, his fingers finding your over sensitive clit as you struggled to form sentences.

you were practically cock drunk at this point, and he was loving every moment. the way your body was reacting to every move, overwhelmed with pleasure before you were suddenly cumming again with little warning, all control lost.

“oh fuck, good girl,” lando groaned as you squeezed around him, cumming inside you only moments later. he was sure to hold you in place, well aware that your body felt limp in his arms.

the small pants and breaths are all that could be heard, slowly coming down from your high before he slipped out of you ━ carefully turning you around so you could lean back against the counter.

you sent him a lazy smile, like always, hands still holding onto his arms for support as his shirt fell back down your body, sitting at your thighs ━ which were slightly shaking.

“i might just order some dinner,” you breathed out with a small grin ━ lando chuckling before nodding along in agreement, eyes having not left you.

that feeling again, although this time it wasn’t a short burst or a quick hit, it was lingering ━ staying in his chest, seeing you in his shirt, sex dazed eyes and a tired smile. hearing you talk about something as simple as ordering dinner for the pair of you.

it felt as if he couldn’t breathe, he wanted to speak; tell you how he felt. he’s never had the urge to tell you how’s he felt yet, not like does right now. but he couldn’t find words, just staring at you pathetically.

you didn’t seem to mind, quite content in the silence before you let out a small hum, snapping him from his thoughts and causing him to part his lips.

he was about to speak, give an explanation for his silence; tell you everything he wants to. but you beat him to it.

“i need to sit down, come on,” you grinned ━ hand grasping around his wrist before you were tugging him to the couch, lando taking those moments to shake himself out of his thoughts. talk himself out of the idea in his head that could ruin things.

but he was greedy. as you pulled him down to the couch, sitting next to each other as you reached for the tv remote, his eyes still stuck on you ━ you were so memorising, almost had him in a trance.

no. he wanted to tell you how he felt. he needed to, it would eat him alive if he didn’t.

“you still want pasta?” you asked him, leaning into his side, semi against his chest so he could see your phone as you opened up the uber eats app ━ snapping him and his hazy mind from their thoughts once more.

“i’m easy, whatever you want,” lando hummed out, in no way would he be able to decide what he wants for dinner, that was the least concerning decision he had to make in these next few moments.

his arm had moved to wrap around you, holding you delicately as you flicked through your phone; the tv acting as background noise as lando fell into heavy thought again.

he wondered if you were aware of his thinking, if you could feel how tense he was underneath you; mind going into a craze as he though of all the possibilities of asking a few simple questions, or saying a few simple things.

“this has been nice,” lando spoke up ━ and once more was he cringing internally, unable to figure out how that was what he came up with. why those were the words that left his mouth.

this has been nice? yeah no shit.

“it has,” you smiled sweetly, offering him a glance off your phone before you were back to focusing on dinner. lando bit his tongue, he could leave it at that. last chance to abort.

“should do it more often,” he hummed out, pressing a short kiss to the top of your head, as if the smell of your hair could ease his racing heart. he was easing into it, still room to abandon ship.

he could just see you smile again, but he could definitely feel you snuggle up closer ━ adjusting your body so you were touching more of him, his arm tightening around your frame.

“you’d get sick of me,” you laughed, eyes remaining ahead of you. you weren’t naive, you could sense where this was going. you knew what lando was thinking, had an inkling of what he wanted to say.

he didn’t want to laugh about this. didn’t want to get playful right now. but you did, in hopes to steer this conversation away from a dreadful ‘what are we?’ situation.

“not possible,” lando sighed out, no shame in his honesty as he tensed up slightly again, watching you carefully to see how you’d react. you only scoffed and laughed, and suddenly he had the need to reassure you again.

not that you expressed need for his reassurance, but he couldn’t help it. he selfishly wanted you to know how he felt.

“could be like this all the time you know?” lando spat it out, voice barely above a whisper as his fingers ran through your hair, almost as a distraction for himself.

your few moments of silence terrified him, he wasn’t naive too. he noticed how you slightly tensed in his hold, how your finger stopped scrolling for a split second on your phone; he felt his stomach drop, he wondered if you did too with how sudden it happened.

“sounds nice… but it couldn’t,” you replied, not looking back at him this time, but not paying attention to your phone in hand now ━ just mindlessly scrolling to look busy, unaware of the many restaurants passing on your screen.

your reply confused the mclaren driver, his eyebrows furrowing ━ not stopping any of his movements either, unable to decided whether to be disheartened or not by your response. sounds nice?

“what do you mean?” he hummed out, sounding genuinely curious because he was. why couldn’t it be like this all the time? he sure as hell could picture it, has been for a while now.

you turned to face him now, wanting to check if he was being serious. and that disheartened, your look of confusion leaving him dumbfounded as he desperately tried to work out why you thought this wasn’t possible.

“you’re hardly here lando,” you mumbled, almost as if you were scared to admit it out loud. as if the fact he was rarely in london upset you, because it did.

you would’ve considered things developing with the driver a long time ago if it wasn’t for his job, but you knew the moment you met him that he was the friend who would only make it to some catch ups. only be at some birthdays. only go on some golf trips. some night outs. he was the one who was always gone, always away.

safe to say you shut the door on anything serious with him a long time ago, well tried to.

“that doesn’t matter,” the brit shrugged, eyes pouring into yours as he looked for any signs of easy persuasion. “i can spend more time here. you can come to monaco, come to a race or two,” lando rambled out, a light hearted laugh afterwards as he realised the weight of his words.

only saying it out loud made him realise how much that would be asking of you, how that much travelling wasn’t normal for everyone. it wasn’t normal for you, that was clear by the sympathetic smile and look you had just gave him, which made him want to throw up.

“it wouldn’t work.” you told him, hand moving to cup his cheek lightly, showing him you knew the weight of your words. you were completely aware of the stab to the heart you had just delivered.

hearing you so convinced, so certain ━ as if you had considered it, already experienced it. he was quick to get on the defensive.

“okay but if you just think about it━” lando began to excuse, unable to accept the fact that it wouldn’t work, or even consider it. he could make it work. he would make it work, you never know until you try at least.

“i have.” you cut him short, raising your eyebrows as you let out a small sigh, noticing the way his face faltered, a frown twitching at his lips. “i’ve thought about it lando, it wouldn’t work.” you mumbled out, a rare admission and insight to your feelings.

it was bittersweet. lando wanting to revel and focus in on the fact that you had thought about it, you had pictured something more with him ━ your mind too had run with the good thing you two had created here.

but you hadn’t come to the same conclusion as him, you hadn’t been as hopeful as him. how could be change that?

“this works though.” you were quick to speak again, hands moving to rest on his chest, offering a hopeful smile. “why change anything when this is fine,” you shrugged out ━ almost sounding desperate.

lando stayed quiet, studying your face, for once being able to read you. it was quite clear what you wanted, what you were suggesting. for things to not change, to pretend this conversation never happened.

“is it fine?” lando asked, pursing his lips ━ more so questioning himself. while it was great, he wasn’t sure he could knowingly go through with it, knowing it would never amount to more.

but then he considered the other option; none of you, nothing at all. maybe this was fine then.

“you said yourself this was nice,” you tried to reason ━ well aware this wasn’t fair. well aware you were asking him to push back his feelings, not even giving him a chance to say what he wanted.

because you knew if he did, if he told you all the things you wanted to here you may fold. give into temptation which would only hurt ten times more when it all comes crumbling down.

distance was not your thing. and with lando it would only be distance, never an escape from time apart. never a solution or answer, you couldn’t commit to that.

“yeah…” lando trailed off, unsure what else to say as his hand moved to brush some hair out of your face, pursing his lips as he struggled to come to terms with the obvious he had been avoiding.

“nothing has to change.” you hummed out, hopeful once more ━ moving to sit up a bit straighter, practically climbing on his lap as your smaller hands moved to cup his face. “just see how this goes… for a bit longer,” you shrugged, biting down on the inside of your cheek.

stalling. that’s what you were doing. he knew it too, knew that you had shut off the idea of anything evolving completely, knew that this was going to be the start of something painful.

but he couldn’t say no to you. you couldn’t deny himself of any of you, so he nodded ━ small smile on his face as he did so.

“yeah okay.” lando compromised, and he felt the breath of relief you let out, watching as you visibly relaxed in front of him while he felt anything but.

like always there was an easy distraction, it was you leaning forward; pressing your lips to his in what was like usual a lust lead kiss. but it was good enough to numb the dulling pain he was sure to experience later on, taking the easy option of kissing back.

i got you touchin’ on your body, i got you touchin’ your body,

i know you’d rather be complacent, but girl i’m so glad we’re acquainted

lando wasn’t necessarily regretting agreeing to keeping things the same, but he wasn’t loving it either.

the fact he refused to tell max about the conversation spoke for itself, he wasn’t proud. he wanted more, that hadn’t changed. but now he had no false hope to hold onto.

he still had you. when he visited england, he’d end up in bed with you one way or another. you’d be sure to convince him to stay the night, he’d wake up with his cock in your mouth and be persuaded to stay for a few hours of the morning as well.

but god it only got harder leaving every time. knowing damn well when he went away you were still here, busying yourself with other guys, not waiting to offer him praise or comfort depending on his weekend, not on standby if he had a shitty day.

the knowledge that he couldn’t have more with you only made him crave it more, not settle for less. so stupidly, instead of cutting his time short in the UK he was still putting time in, making excuses to come see you ━ even though it was pointless.

nothing changed.

sex was still great. the few moments of affection afterwards were too. but you showed no signs of opening up or changing your mind, and he felt stupid for thinking you may.

you got his hopes up every now and then however. a bit more passion behind your words or kisses every now and then, clinging to him a little tighter in the club when out with friends; or a sense of desperation in your tone in getting him to stay the night.

it was as if you picked up on when lando was starting to get distant, when he was finally making the first step in getting over you.

he didn’t text you one time, to say he was in town again. it didn’t work last time and it didn’t work this time either, running into him at the grocery store of all places.

he hadn’t even been grocery shopping for years, but he was convinced it was the last place he would see you. regardless he did, you were unbothered on the surface as always.

jokes about not telling you he was here, flirtatious glances and suddenly you were riding him in the front seat of his mclaren with steamed up windows.

he was hooked again, came back a week later just to spend a few more nights with you once more. a never ending cycle of convincing himself to get over you, just to end up on top of you again and again.

he would’ve hoped the long periods of time apart would help, that the triple headers meaning a month away would make him have no choice but to forget about you.

but it didn’t. because visiting you again was still the first thing on his mind, planning a trip to his home country was always in motion and it was oh so frustrating, because he was so aware of how self-destructive all of this was.

although then you reached out while he was away. something new, a text congratulating him on a good qualifying performance.

it excited him too much, but rightfully so as a phone call followed. he was surprised it was just a friendly conversation, a catch up; flirting sure, but it didn’t turn sexual.

then it happened again, not every week he was away; but every now and then you’d call ━ one time drunk, he remembers that one vividly.

“lando!” you practically yelled, the driver who was tucked into bed flinching as he quickly removed the phone from his ear as he chuckled out. “lando?” you repeated.

“yes i’m here,” lando hummed, identifying the sound of girls giggling in the background, the wind clear ━ heels clicking against what he could only guess was pavement.

“shhh, i’m trying to hear him,” he heard you hiss, incoherent words and mumbles clarifying his suspicions that you had been drinking, that and the over enthusiastic tone you were speaking in. “sorry. i was talking about you so decided to call,” you hummed, the distant chatter fading out.

he quirked a brow at that, a breathy laugh leaving his own lips at your honesty. although the internal confusion was only continuing to grow, how you could be so honest and open about your thoughts with him yet so closed off at the same time.

“good things i hope.” lando had hummed out, hand tangling through his curls as your laughter rang through the speakers again.

“mostly,” you mused ━ before you let out a gasp, the sound of your feet scuffing on the ground relatively clear before you weee laughing again. “oops,” you mumbled, lando shaking his head as you spoke to yourself about almost tripping.

anyone else calling him at this hour when he was ready to sleep would annoy him, but hearing you shit talk and drunkenly giggle was more than fine; just because it was you.

“when will you be here again?” your questioned, a dramatic sigh following as the chatter in the background grew louder, before growing quiet again ━ you walking off your friends as he let out a small laugh.

“another month. at least.” lando muttered out, sounding more than disappointed in himself. he wanted to give you a different answer, to prove you wrong and have distance not be an issue. but he couldn’t, he was well and truly out of reach.

the alcohol running in your veins made hiding your disappointment impossible, another drastic sigh leaving your lips as you nodded ━ not that he could see you.

“not any sooner?” you mumbled out quietly, sounding way too upset for lando’s liking, although selfishly the fact you cared warmed his heart ━ his inability to reassure you made him realise maybe you were right.

this wouldn’t work, it was hard enough how things were.

“unfortunately not, no.” he spoke just as quietly ━ letting out a deep breath, refraining from giving you any loving reassurance because you were drunk. who knew if you actually cared when he was back or not, the alcohol could be doing the speaking.

“i miss you.” another hit to the heart, lando almost wincing at your confession, unable to convince himself you actually meant it ━ but he wanted to believe it. but that also came with the realisation that he was the reason you sounded so upset; which was hard to come to terms with.

or maybe you did miss him, just not in the way he missed you.

“miss you too,” lando spoke positively this time, a raise in volume and octave, deciding to not egg on your upsetting mood. not fair to get you to reveal things while under the influence. “but i’ll be back before you know it.”

you mumbled incoherent words once more, then the voice of a friend came through and lando was sat there listening to a drunken conversation for a few moments, attempting to overthink everything you had just said.

“i’ve gotta go,” you slurred ━ sounding more cheerful now, and lando was both relieved and upset. because while he didn’t wish for you to be down about him being gone, it was quite the ego boost. “i’ll speak to you later okay, don’t be afraid to call me too ya know,” was your parting words, giggling at your own statement before hanging up.

he had not taken too much from that call, having learnt his lesson from holding onto small glimpses of hope ━ but he did start calling you more often.

he realised you were right, you didn’t have to be the one to make all the first moves. he shouldn’t be so scared of crossing any lines, not when you dance all over them without a care in the world it seemed.

so the phone calls were more regular, not too in depth or long ━ just small talk, catch ups; made up for the lack of conversation that occurs when you see each other in person.

he had gotten used to it now, your name lighting up on his phone screen, enough so he didn’t feel like a giddy kid who was getting a text from their crush.

“you’re up early,” lando spoke as he sat up in bed, time zones meaning he was about to fall asleep, and you should’ve been asleep, about to wake up.

“haven’t slept actually,” your tired voice filled his ears; his eyes shifting to the clock on the bedside of his hotel room, managing to make a rough estimation of the time back in england, 4am.

“night out?” lando yawned, hearing you rustle around in your bed sheets, a hum leaving your lips as you shook your head; not that he could see you.

“no, well i went out for dinner. haven’t been drinking though,” you told him with a blunt laugh, lando’s chuckle tuning into yours before it trailed off into a comfortable silence.

lando wasn’t too sure what to say, considering you had called him. and the pair of you had spoke earlier in the day, allowing him to fill you in on how he’s spent the first couple of days of the race weekend.

“you left your shirt here by the way, found it while cleaning,” you soon spoke up, lando nodding ━ not at all surprised as he let out a small hum of recognition.

“which one?” he asked, not at all that interested because he couldn’t care less what he had left at yours. he wouldn’t be surprised to find a bra or two of yours laying around his apart in the UK.

“it’s like blue━ i’ll take a photo,” you spoke out, movement and rustling of sheets filling the speaker as lando assumed you were going to grab the shirt, which didn’t seem at all necessary.

lando had chuckled again, mumbling about how it didn’t really matter what shirt it was ━ then the photo came through, the sharp breath he took as he opened the photo causing you to giggle, making lando realise your words were somewhat calculated.

that was his shirt. except it was on your body, you kneeling on the bed ━ a mirror selfie, and while it could easily be seen as innocent his eyes were immediately drawn to your nipples pointing through the material. and where the shirt ended on your thighs, having most certainly been pulled up to rest higher up on your skin.

“that’s definitely mine.” lando muttered out, eyes still glued to the photo in front of him, admiring shamelessly of you in his clothes ━ the background noise of you climbing back into bed hardly noticed by him.

“you should come get it.” you huffed out, attempting to play dumb to avoid recognising the fact that lando wouldn’t be seeing you anytime soon for a couple weeks.

“soon.” lando sighed at the reminder he couldn’t grant your wishes, now more than ever wanting nothing more than to rock up on your door step.

you seemed to be missing him more than you had let on though, the small whine that left your lips causing lando’s jaw to clench, the sound way too familiar to the brit. immediate flashbacks to the way you would squirm and whine underneath him.

“i’m going fucking crazy without you,” you spoke through frustration, voice above a whisper; he could practically see your pouting lips as you spoke, adjusting in his bed as the room suddenly felt ten times hotter.

focusing on your needy tone to your words was the better option than focusing on the meaning behind them.

“yeah?” lando asked in confirmation, still having not exited the picture you had sent him. focusing in on your face now, the sparkle in your eyes was picked up enough by the camera, he knew the look all too well and it excited him.

“mhm,” you confirmed, moving in your sheets once more. “need you. wanna feel you,” your quiet admission was not missed by his ears, biting down on the inside of his cheek as he quickly pictured you in your bed, needy for him ━ missing him.

he wasn’t aware you felt such a way, while it wouldn’t have been hard to work out he seems to assume the worst when it comes to you now, to avoid any disappointment.

“that why you called me love?” lando spoke out, only now pressing back onto the phone call screen, a hum of thought escaping his throat. “that why you can’t sleep? thinking of me?”

“yeah,” you admitted, no time for lando to fear he was being to forward. “thinking of your fingers especially. mine don’t compare,” you pretty much whined again, and lando almost groaned, now stuck with the image of you touching yourself in his head.

“you can’t just say those things,” lando muttered out through gritted teeth, mind well and truly in the gutter now, hand moving to adjust his sweatpants which suddenly felt way too tight.

“wish you were here,” you ignored, another sigh leaving your lips; and the movement of the sheets once more had him wondering just what you were doing.

“what would you want me to do if i was there baby?” the driver asked, genuine curiosity to his question although he had a few good ideas of the answer you’d give.

another small whine escaped your lips, cheeks flushing yet you had no hesitation in telling him just what you had been thinking about.

“would want you to go down on me,” you whispered, speaking through a breath. “miss your tongue so fucking much, wanna have your head between my thighs.” you elaborated, and your neediness for him had the driver squirming.

“would want to suck you off first though.” you were quick to speak again, lando shutting his eyes to deal with the heat rising on his body from your filthy words. “wanna have your cock down my throat again, let you fuck my face till i’m crying,”

lando grunted at that, images he hadn’t seen for too long flashing in his mind again. it didn’t take much for you to turn him on, he had realised that quite some time ago. but his patience had already run thin, your words and his own memory not proving enough.

“fucking hell darling,” lando breathed out, quick to press the facetime button without any thought, his hand running through his curls once. “answer it.” he practically grumbled.

moments later the facetime call connected, lando sitting up straight on the headboard as you came into frame, it clear you were laying in bed.

still in his shirt, flushed cheeks and a sheepish smile, lip red from chewing on it. lando couldn’t help but smirk, tongue wetting his bottom lip as he took in the sight of you.

“you’re not making this any easier you know?” lando question, his free hand having moved to rest over his hard on which was aching for some attention, but his full focus was on you.

he watched as you sheepishly smiled once more, bottom lip rolling through your teeth as you adjusted in the bed, catching sight of you pushing your sheets off of you.

“two weeks is too long,” you huffed out, taking in his heated state as well. you could see his intense stare, the way his attention hadn’t left the phone, and just a look at him had you ready to beg for him.

“you gotta make do baby,” lando spoke, acting as if he too wasn’t struggling. the insight into you being the one suffering was almost enjoyable, so convinced he was alone in spending every damn day thinking of you and reuniting once more. “touch yourself for me yeah? i’ll help you out hm, tell you what to do.” lando spoke, accent thick as ever.

“please,” you nodded quickly, looking relieved at his words as you were quick to trail your hand down to your thighs, pushing lando’s shirt up and out of your way.

lando had smiled ever so slightly at the plea, before seeing you sweep into action he became aware he wanted a view of it all, quick to interrupt you.

“put your phone down, so i can see all of you.” he instructed, wave of confidence washing over him as he raised an eyebrow; and you weren’t going to object.

your eyes scanning the bed as you tried to figure out the best way to do this, deciding on sitting up a little bit so you were leaning against the head board. you moved one of your pillows in front of you, before propping your phone against it.

lando almost moaned at the sight once more, wanting nothing more than to reach through the phone and spread your legs himself.

“good girl, spread your legs for me,” he spoke clearly, and even now that your face was some distance away from the camera he could still see your red cheeks.

you listened however, no shame in spreading your legs and revealing your exposed cunt ━ his shirt the only thing dressing your body. lando didn’t think he could get any more riled up but he was wrong.

“fuck princess,” he mumbled out, taking another deep breath; resisting the urge of taking a photo, although he was sure this would be engraved in his memory. “can see how wet you are from here, fucking soaked,” he commented, and you could only nod.

“told you i was thinking of you,” you reminded him as if he had forgot, biting down on your tongue at the compromised position. yet having your legs spread for him on facetime didn’t feel wrong, you were loving every moment of it.

“play with your clit for me hm, close your eyes and pretend it’s me.” lando instructed once more, causing you to feel the heat rise up your neck once more from his explicit words.

you obliged however, fingers quickly finding your clit, spreading a bit of your wetness first before rubbing a couple of light and small circles. your head fell back, eyes fluttering shut as you thought of lando being there instead.

“doesn’t feel the same,” you whimpered out, lando only humming out in reply however. his erection was painful at this point, his hand already having slipped under the waistband of his sweats to wrap around his cock, lazily jacking off to the beautiful sight.

he was still focusing on only you however, wanting to get you off in any way he could without touching you.

“fuck you look so pretty like this, legs spread just for me,” the driver praised, and his voice alone made your touch feel all that better as a small moan escaped your lips. “go a little faster baby, just for a bit.”

you didn’t hesitate to do as he said, eyes opening just so you could see him on the phone, making out that he was watching you intently.

“please lando,” you whined ━ unsure what you were asking for, maybe more; because this wasn’t enough. nothing had been enough since he last left your apartment. nothing was enough anymore, unless it was him.

“go on, finger yourself then ━ always so needy for more,” lando teased, seeing you eager in bed was not new but you always had some patience for when lando wanted to take his time, so he was slightly surprised to see you so desperate.

he watched as you slid a finger inside your entrance with ease, gasping slightly at the feeling as your eyes fluttered shut again ━ his hand still working his cock as he watch every move you made.

“not been getting fucked like you deserved huh? gotta spread your legs like a slut for me, just to get off?” lando’s voice was ringing in your ears, whining at his words once more as you were quick to nod in agreement, finger moving in and out of you didn’t feel near as good as his praise and taunts.

“haven’t━ haven’t been fucked at all,” you moaned out. “waiting for you,” you rushed out as you moaned once more, struggling to get your words out as you slid another finger inside yourself.

lando thought he was numb to the feeling of affection with you but he was wrong, even in the list driven moment he was flustered and flattered by your words, false sense of hope almost sneaking back in.

“should’ve done this sooner then love,” lando grumbled, a moan of his own slipping out as he jacked off to the sight of you and your fingers. “would drop anything to see you like this, making a mess all over your fingers,” his words continued to spill out.

“curl your fingers pretty girl, try find that spot hm,” lando practically coo’d, knowing your body better than you did. because you blindly listened, moans continuing to fall from your lips as your fingers moved in and out of your pussy.

you tried finding the spot that made you see stars, the spot lando managed to find every damn time, whimpering and whining as you failed a couple times before you finally did so ━ fingers curling perfectly that for a moment it did feel like lando was here between your legs.

“oh fuck,” you moaned out, lando moaning again as he kept lazily getting off. you heard him let out a hum of approval, even a small chuckle although it was tuned out as your pleasure built.

“there you go baby,” he was practically grinning, paying attention as your legs started to shake; adoring the way your back was arching. his shirt had never looked so good, and god he was looking forward to fucking you in it the moment he lands back on his home soil.

“i’m close,” you whimpered out ━ almost amazed how your orgasm could be approaching so quickly, when you had struggled to get near the past couple of days. lando had a hold over your body and it was only getting harder to ignore.

“want you to wait a bit,” lando breathed out, paying just a little more mind to his own hand. “want to keep watching you yeah, be a good girl and keep playing with your cunt for me,”

you whined at that, again, always bloody whining for him, but you couldn’t say no. eager to please, obsessed with the idea as you nodded quickly, a shaky breath following as you listened to his words.

“fucking obsessed with all your pretty sounds,” lando’s praise continued, only having you moan out again, struggling to keep your shaking legs still, fingers and arm already tiring; practically panting before you removed your fingers, opting to rub your clit instead.

lando was watching you through hooded eyes, every moan and twitch of your body driving him insane as his hand sped up, his own high fast approaching as he let out a grunt or too.

“want to cum?” his questioned had your eyes opening, focusing back on your phone as you nodded quickly.

“please, please, please,” you didn’t have to be told to beg for it, whimpering out your pleas as you rubbed your clit quickly, hoping he didn’t plan on denying you of an orgasm as he had before. those nights were always fun but you don’t think you had it in you tonight.

“cum for me love,” was all you needed to hear, eyes fluttering shut once more as you moaned his name, your release one long awaited but felt so good, body shaking as you came.

the brit came too only a few moments later, the sight of your shaking body enough to send him over the edge, watching as you came all over your fingers as he came in his hand, his moans no match to your loud ones.

it took a few moments to catch your breath before you were sitting up properly once more and having ahold of your phone again, your cheeks flushed from your tired body, and a little bit of embarrassment.

“did you cum?” you mumbled out sheepishly, earning a chuckle from the driver which had a small smile growing on your own features, your breaths still heavy.

“yeah.” lando summed up pretty quickly, and you were almost disappointed that you missed out on that sight ━ way too caught up in your own pleasure to pay attention to anything other than his words.

there was silence again. comfortable silence of course, never awkward as you caught your breath. lando was just looking at you in awe, like he always did. both thinking back on what he had just witnessed and admiring your current beauty.

“alright you go get cleaned up and get some sleep yeah?” lando soon spoke out, raising an eyebrow ━ and the concern in his voice had you smiling like an idiot.

you nodded blindly once more, fuck he could tell you to do anything and you would. you couldn’t ignore your feelings anymore.

maybe it was the post orgasm haze that had you thinking such away. or maybe you had just spent roo much time apart that you realised you couldn’t keep settling less, regardless ━ you were speaking up about it.

“wait.” you quickly spoke up, realising he was about to go. “i can’t keep doing this.” you rushed out, watching as the brit’s eyes furrowed in confusion. then a flash of slight panic and hurt.

you can’t do this? you’re going to tell him this after phone sex? after having him thinking you only wanted him?

“as in, pretending this isn’t…” you quickly realised he had misinterpreted your words; wanting to clarify quickly although instead you just stumbled over them, unable to get your thoughts together.

“i want to make this work.” you finally got it out, biting down on your bottom lip, watching as lando’s eyebrows raised in surprise.

he had smiled, unable to stop the genuine reaction, feeling as if his whole world just lit up in front of him. but he was quick to reason with himself, always used to talking himself out of believing any of your words.

“you do?” the driver asked out quietly, and you only nodded with a small hum of confirmation, looking so certain in your words yet it still didn’t have him convinced.

he still thought you were too good to be true.

“why don’t we talk about this when you’ve had some sleep yeah?” lando suggested, your face instantly dropping. your turn to stress, your turn to overthink.

had he changed his mind? could you blame him if he had? you’re the reason the situation was so complicated.

“yeah… okay,” you hesitantly agreed, nodding as you watched him give you a sympathetic smile. quickly sending you into a pit of regret, feeling incredibly stupid for speaking up.

“call me when you wake up okay?” lando asked, not oblivious to the way your mood had dropped. “then you can elaborate on the whole waiting for me and making this work thing, yeah?” he was grinning again, sounding oh so smug which had you smiling as you now rolled your eyes.

somewhat relieved, realising he just wanted to talk about it properly; he wasn’t avoiding the conversation. not like you had.

he just wanted to make sure you were meaning what you were saying.

“don’t ruin it.” you grumbled out, although the smile was still plastered on your face as he chuckled once more.

a mumble of goodbyes and good nights before you were hanging up, leaving the pair of you with a stupid giddy feeling.

and for the first time ever, lando was confident that his false hope may not be false. that maybe, just maybe, he could have all of you.

━

a/n; idk how i feel about this but here u go i hope u enjoy ━ as usual she’s unedited so standby on the errors lol, anyways i’m excited to get these 2k celebration fics rolling heheh

they’re not gonna be daily, but they should be coming out quicker than usual!! feel free to leave any song by the weeknd and a driver as a suggestion if u want heheh

as always feedback is loved and adored, ty for the continuous support on my fics i love u all sm <333

#f1 smut #lando norris smut #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #x reader #f1 #smut #lando norris x reader #lando norris #lando norris fic #lando norris angst #lando norris imagine #f1 fic #f1 angst #f1 fluff

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sweetkpopmusings · 1 year

Text

vernon best friend headcanons <3

a/n: i love vernon so much platonically (and non-platonically) and i needed some serotonin at 2 am so here we are :,-) also pics not mine ofc!

content: fluff | wc: 0.8k | warnings: none! | pairing: bestfriend!vernon x gn!reader | requests: open

definitely the ride-or-die type of best friend

it doesn’t matter if you met when you were younger or as adults — once he knew how much you two clicked, he became one of your most loyal and loving supporters

but i think he shows it in the silliest ways

like you tell him a bad joke, and, when you look at him for a reaction, he says “shutup, stupid” but with the softest smile on his face

he will NOT give in by laughing but you know he loves it

he is such a silly little guy himself

so y’all are frequently doing dumb shit together

not just the texting only in memes (which happens frequently since you both have developed a shared collection of reaction pics/gifs)

but you’ll both just be talking and suddenly you’re acting out this whole bit you came up with on the spot about a shirt that’s made of the shamwow

even if you don’t think of yourself as a funny person, you become a comedic genius in the presence of vernon

jokes aside, your friendship is a source of calm

he’s the type of friend you turn to for solace on your most stressful days

even if he sometimes doesn’t know how to properly react (homeboy froze up the first time he saw you cry but he only got awkward because he felt so sad seeing you so sad :-( what a sweet angel) he ALWAYS makes you feel comforted

and he’s always willing to learn more about what you need in terms of support because he always wants to be the best friend he can be !

it goes the same for you too — while it takes a lot for him to get vulnerable, when he builds that trust with you, you cherish it by gaining the tools needed to support him

and he’s so grateful for it like his heart swells with joy whenever he leans on you in hard times because he’s so lucky to have you as a rock

speaking of rock

“black eye” is the proof i needed for my argument that vernon is in his angsty / emo / pop punk phase

so he’s totally the bestie who will jam out to pop punk with you (if you’re into it! i’m very into it and i would give everything i have to listen to neck deep with vernon like i'm being so serious rn)

in fact, he is the bestie who will jam out with you to your favorite music any time anywhere

he LOVES collaborative playlists that you two make together

and yes these sometimes become super niche and specific

but whether you’re listening to your “top shower songs” playlist or your “standing in the back corner of a gas station deciding on which drink to buy so you can use their bathroom” playlist, this is one of vernon’s best ways to appreciate and celebrate your friendship

he thinks the best way to know each other is through sharing music and all the other things you like/enjoy, and that’s how you learned a lot about each other in the beginning of your friendship

you of course meet the rest of seventeen and vernon has so much pride every time one of the members comments on how cool/funny/smart/etc you are

because he’s like YEAH that’s MY best friend right there!!!!!!!!

will be so down to take cool af photos of you

even if he needs some coaching on what your best angles / preferred poses are he is taking down copious notes so he can nail it every time

i can’t believe how long this is getting jfc i guess i really want vernon to be my buddy

he loves to just vibe with you

since you two are on the same wavelength most of the time, he thinks it’s the most fun to get food and chill at home watching movies, tv, or youtube together

like whatever you’re in the mood for you’ll do and it’ll be a great time because you’re together

he also strikes me as the type of best friend who likes being friends with your other friends

he doesn’t need to be super close with them, but he wants to make sure you are able to have him in a group setting too because he knows your other friends are important to you

i think he also loves mimicking you

like if you say something he thinks is interesting/funny he will immediately repeat it

whenever he tells stories that involve you, he impersonates you perfectly (this is also true when he is telling a story about you to you)

it’s just another way he shows how much he pays attention to you and loves you

overall he’s such a fun guy to be around and whenever you’re together it’s carefree and comfortable and secure

he is ALWAYS by your side because he knows you’ll do the same for him

and he is ALWAYS ready to make fun of you for the same reason

someone please give me a vernon tysm

#seventeen #seventeen headcanons #bestfriend!seventeen #seventeen imagines #svt #vernon #hansol #seventeen vernon #seventeen fluff #seventeen x reader #vernon x reader #hansol x reader #vernon fluff #svt hansol #svt headcanons #svt vernon #seventeen au #svt au #sweetkpopmusings

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heavyhitterheaux · 1 year

Text

Ghost in the Machine (collab with @harlowsbby 😘💕)

AN: Yall not ready for this lol 😘💕

Synopsis: Jack has been promising you to make you his girlfriend for several months. However, it all comes crashing down around you when you find out he wanted to have you and someone else instead

Pairing: Jack Harlow x Reader

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

Lately you felt like your mind was on autopilot and you just wanted any and every distraction that came your way, after everything that went down with Jack, you were throwing yourself in any and everything. You just needed something to get your mind off the fact that he was no good for you and what he did was his doing not your own. He made his bed and now it was time for him to lay in it.

Broken promises after broken promises and you had reached your breaking point.

He was a charmer

A smooth talker

He could be reading a grocery list, and it would make you intrigued

“Baby, just a little while longer. I promise.”

“You keep saying that, but it’s already been seven months. I’m starting to think that you don’t want to be with me at all.”

“Y/N, come on now. You know that you’re the only person that’s on my mind all the time.”

“I’m tired of going to events with you and we can’t even act like we’re together. I mean technically we aren’t, but…”

“I promise it will all be worth it. Everyone is going to know about us when the time is right. I just ask you to be patient with me.”

In the back of your mind you knew that you probably should not have agreed to this, but of course you did anyway.

Not realizing the shit storm that would be coming right around the corner.

“Okay.” You said as you smiled up at him and he leaned down to kiss you.

“There’s that smile that I love so much on my pretty girl.”

Urban being Jack’s best friend honestly thought that you were a rebound after Jack got out of his long term relationship. However, the way he talked about you made him think otherwise. When Jack wasn’t focusing on his music, at events, or performing, the entire conversation always circled back towards you.

Urban thought that you were perfect for him and would be a breath of fresh air from the toxic relationship that he had previously been in. You were sweet, kind, considerate, and honestly a fun person to be around. If Urban had met you first, he would have definitely made you his girlfriend and not be stringing you along like Jack was doing.

Even though the conversation always circled back to you, it also circled back to his toxic ex-girlfriend Vanessa. They had been in a whirlwind of a relationship for three years and Urban had been so happy when they broke up. Time and time again he would tell Jack how she wasn’t good for him and needed to find someone that wanted to be with him because of who he was as a person and not because of his famous status.

You still remember the first time you actually met Jack.

You were a huge fan and had been since Loose dropped and would finally be able to go to one of his club appearances.

From the moment he hit the stage, his eyes locked on you and it had been that way ever since.

And since you didn’t want to go by yourself, of course you dragged Ella with you.

“He’s totally looking at you, there is no way he isn’t.” Ella has been your best friend since diapers and she tended to have this habit of being delusional.

“There is no way he was looking at me Ella like let’s be serious here.”

“Fine don’t believe me but all I’m saying is every time he looks over here he’s looking at you.”

Jack was in the middle of performing Sundown when he looked your way again and sent you a wink

“See! I’m not crazy, he just winked at you.”

“Oh hush” you told Ella playfully

After the show the two of you began to walk back towards your car when you noticed a black suv driving behind the two of you slowly.

“Is that car following us?” Ella asked

“I was just about to say the same thing, should we run?” She nodded her head yes quickly but before the two of you were able to run someone had yelled from the suv.

“I promise I’m not going to kidnap you, I just wanted to get your number.” Looking behind you your mouth almost flew open seeing it was Jack.

“You want my number? But why” he laughed “Because you’re beautiful”

You regretted that day you ever gave him your number if you knew the emotional rollercoaster you’d he on back then you wouldn’t have ever given him your number or have him a chance to ever play you.

You and Urban had gotten close from the time that you had met Jack and since he was doing a few interviews and had a full day ahead of him, Urban decided to take it upon himself to keep you company.

The two of you were currently sharing a large plate of nachos at one of the most popular Mexican restaurants in the city and you were sharing with Urban what classes that you wanted to take in the spring in order for you to be able to get your degree faster.

“Y/N, that sounds like a lot. When are you going to sleep?”

“I’ll be fine, Urb. It’s only one semester.”

“Only one semester my ass. You pulled the same shit last spring and you slept for like 2 hours in your car every day for almost 5 months because your schedule was so full. You CANNOT do that again. Jack flipped his shit when I told him about that.”

“Yeah, that definitely was not a pleasant conversation.” You said while adding more sour cream to the plate in front of you. Jack was concerned that you had barely been sleeping, but it had been worth it in the end when you had gotten straight A’s.

“And of course he was like why didn’t you tell me?! And I was like I only found out when I went to get her to bring her to the video shoot that day otherwise I wouldn’t have known either.”

“Aww, Urby is worried about me!”

“Ehh, I guess I do worry sometimes. You’re good for Jack and I want to see my best friend happy. He couldn’t have dropped Vanessa fast enough.”

“That’s his ex?” You curiously asked and Urban nodded.

“It's weird that he never mentioned her to me.”

“Why should he mention his ex to a girl who is a million times better?”

“Stop, Urban!” You said while shying away from him.

“I call it like I see it. They were…. not good for each other. But you two are.”

Just then Urban got a call from Jack on his phone and quickly answered it putting it on speaker.

“Jack, you good?” Urban asked as the two of you continued to eat your food.

“.... Y/N? Not a chance in hell. She’s a sweet girl and a good fuck and that’s about it. I keep promising her that I’ll make her my girlfriend but she hasn’t gotten a damn clue yet. It’s been seven months and she’s still here so I highly doubt that she’s going anywhere. And she’s so insecure like it’s insane. If she sees me glance at another girl, she’s all up on me. I’m like you not even my girl, so why are you getting so upset? I can never see myself being with her. Compared to Vanessa? She’s a 6 on a good day with Nessa is a 15. Oh and me and Nessa are back together anyway. Have been for three months.”

Urban immediately hung up the phone and looked over at you to see that your eyes were now watering.

“Y/N…. I….”

“Urban, I want to go home. Now.”

“But….”

“I’ll change my flight, whatever I have to do, but I need to go.”

“Maybe there’s an explanation, just hear him out… maybe?” Urban was pleading with you as you gathered your purse and threw money down on the table to pay for the nachos which Urban quickly shoved back towards you.

“There is no explanation, Urb. I heard all that I needed to hear. And let me pay for this!”

“No, I got it. Just… we’ll go back to the hotel and I’ll help you pack your stuff.”

You were a crying mess the entire time while packing and Urban was helping you. He told you that he would go to the airport with you to make sure you got there safely and to text him the moment you landed back home.

“I can’t believe I really fell for this. I’m so stupid.”

“You aren’t stupid!

“Yes I am! He strung me along for seven months just to go back to his ex!”

“Y/N, I’ll talk to him.”

“Forget it, Urban. Tell him to lose my number and to never call me again.”

You had hugged Urban once he had made sure that you had gotten to the airport safely and he watched you until he couldn’t see you anymore.

Your flight was leaving in thirty minutes when Jack had suddenly been blowing up your phone.

Jack- Baby, I can explain

Jack- Come on babe, I didn’t mean anything I said

Jack- You’re the only one for me. She doesn’t mean anything to me

Jack- Babe, please just answer me or call me back

Jack- I love you so much and I’m going to fix this

Taglist:

@harlowsbby

@babyharleezy

@hoodharlow

@stefansalvatoresgf

@jackiehollanderr

@primadxna-girl

@dessmxsworld

@cockslutslurper3000

@raelorns21

@variety-fangirl

@gbaabyyyy

@kamorsstuff

@harlowthot

@sinsandsuccubus

@curlyhairclub

@bootlegroach

@haylexo10

@thinkingaboutjharlow

@fluidsentiment

@charli123456789

@moody4world

@yourstrulymayah

@yana4life

@beanbagbitch

@alinaharlow

@carma-fanficaddict

@minaxcarter

@arination99

@xjup1t3r

@venusvinc

@jacksmoviestar

@jackharloww

@midnight-star47

@minkookie95

@inluvwithladybug

@exoticr0ses

@jharlowsangels

@jackierose902109

@jackmansbabymama

@cmalass

@megawhoree

@softtcurse

@sia2raw

@miniaturehideoutmentality

@hoya122

@nattinatalia

@jackslover12

@skyesthebomb

@jackharlows-world

@louisianalady

@fdl305

@automaticpeachsong

@harlowcomehome

@gassyandsassy1

@babygirlwilly

@amethyst09

@harrycanyonmoonn

@toocriticalharlow

@liv2sworld

@tattered-tales

@sisiking99

@dessxoxsworld

@gillybear17

@jacksdaycare

@iheartharlow

@disaster-rose

@babyvinnie

@evansxchalamet

@chtkmyharlow

@mortirolo

#jack harlow #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow x black reader #jack harlow angst #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow x you

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lizard-on-a-window-pane · 1 year

Text

The Prettiest Star

i started writing this last night but finished it today so it’s kind of both Song-fic Saturday and Smutty Sunday for my 250 Followers Writing Event

Song-fic Saturday 🎶 song: The Prettiest Star by David Bowie

pairing: Sirius Black x plus size! reader

tags / warnings: NSFW (minors do not interact!), smut, angst, fluff, friends to lovers, oral, p in v (unprotected — use condoms y’all, this is fantasy), fem!reader, plus size! reader, reader insecurities about her weight, body positivity, non-magical au (couldn’t have them just apparating out of the rain, right?)

notes: i’m a huge music fan and love Bowie and have been listening to Aladdin Sane a lot because it’s just had its 50th anniversary, so hence the song inspiration (“The Prettiest Star”)

word count: 8.1k (yike, please enjoy)

“Does this look too tight?” you ask Lily as you look at your reflection in your favourite jumper, tugging it down repeatedly. You’ve never been particularly thin, but you’d gained a noticeable amount recently, and it was increasingly making getting dressed the worst part of your day. “It looks fine, Y/N,” she says, a bit dismissively, then catches herself (and the look on your face), and adds, “Really. You look beautiful. Don’t ever let the scale tell you different,” giving you a warm smile. It was the “right” thing to say, perhaps, and you were grateful for what a sweet friend she always was to you, truly, but it didn’t make you feel any better. And… if you were brutally honest, it kind of annoyed you. You couldn’t quite put your finger on why, and the feeling made you feel guilty on top of everything else. After all, she hadn’t done anything wrong; in fact, she was just genuinely trying to help, or perhaps even just genuine in what she said. But somehow, when it came to any comments on your body — especially specifically about your weight, negative or positive, you grew irritable even more than uncomfortable. You felt as if no one understood the mix of self-consciousness and self-confidence that you felt. As if everyone projected either how they felt about themselves or how they assumed all fat people felt onto you. Worse, you felt that you could never express your true feelings to anyone. Even when you tried, things came out muddled, or things you said were directly contradictory — yet equally true. It couldn’t possibly be that no one else felt contradictory things about themselves, about their bodies, could it? Were you just shit at articulating your feelings, or were your feelings that atypical?

You opt to keep the jumper on even though it hugged your chest a bit more tightly than usual. A twinge of regret went through you at the thought that usually winter was your favourite time in terms of fashion in general and your wardrobe specifically. You loved your winter clothes and winter aesthetics overall. You really didn’t want to let a little weight gain get in the way of that, but it had a way of making itself known no matter how much you tried to avoid it.

On cue, it whispers in your head, “You probably only like winter clothes more because they cover more of you. None of those pretty sundresses Lily, Marlene, Mary, or Dorcas wear ever fit you. Not to mention any summer outfit that involves no bra or a visible bralette - not a chance.” You shake your head at yourself, trying to convince yourself that comfort was a complicated thing, that you didn’t have to overanalyze everything in such an accusatory way.

You finish getting ready and head to the pub with Lily to meet the others. Remus and James greet you, and James can’t say enough times how lovely Lily looks. It makes you happy for them, two of your best friends so in love, but you can’t help but feel a little funny, a little longing at the lack of those comments ever made about you.

The thing is, you didn’t dislike yourself. In fact, there were many times you genuinely thought you were beautiful, or that you wouldn’t trade yourself for anyone else. But those thoughts came more easily when you were alone, and not wanting to be anyone else did not include not wanting to be yourself, minus a bit here or there.

You feel a pair of arms come around your middle from behind you, and there’s no time to be freaked out because you immediately know who it is. It’s like a sixth sense. Sure, you recognize his intoxicating smell, can feel and hear the texture of his characteristic leather jacket, but there’s more to it. Before you even consciously register these things or hear him whisper in your ear, you know it’s him. Sirius. Your best friend in the entire world. “Hello, darling girl,” he greets. “How is my finest friend on this finest of evenings?”

“Hi, Siri,” you smile, leaning back into him. “I’m alright; you?” You turn your head up to look at him. “Just alright? Oh, we need to remedy that, love. Urgently.” He looks around a bit, registering your other friends, sharing greetings here and there. “D’you have a drink yet? Let’s go get one, yeah?” he asks, unwinding his arms from his hug but leaving one around your shoulders, where it stays as you walk over to the bar together.

“You’re good then?” you ask again, giggling a bit - sometimes it was as if you couldn’t help it; his presence made you giddy. “Me? Oh, I’m wonderful. I’ve been having the greatest hair day, which is truly saying something, and now I’m with you,” he squeezes your shoulder a bit, “What else could I possibly ask for?”

You roll your eyes, your smile never fading, wrap your arm around his waist, and say, “Two rum and cokes, maybe?” You nod toward the bartender. “You always have better luck getting their attention than I do. It’s like they only see the attractive girls, honestly.”

Comments like these came easily to you when you were around people you trusted. It was strange; they weren’t really intended as self-deprecating. And you weren’t fishing for compliments either, especially not with your closest friends. Part of you wanted to be able to make comments like that freely, to not have to censor your thoughts and feelings when it came to your appearance, thinking that such things really shouldn’t be taboo in the first place, and especially not with people you loved. The other part, well, you weren’t so sure what the other part wanted.

“You’re attractive,” Sirius responds, matter-of-factly, your heart rushing a little at the sound of it. You knew you had feelings for him, had for ages and had no use in denying it, but there was also the lack of pity in his comment. He never treated you as fragile; his voice never took on the tone of a motivational poster. “Maybe not to everyone,” he adds candidly, “but no one is attractive to everyone. And,” he pauses, looking down at you conspiratorially, “a lot of people have shit taste anyway.” He pauses again, considering you intently. Then something shifts in his expression, and he adds, speaking more quickly than before, “I mean, not everyone likes Bowie, for example. Bowie, Y/N, Bowie. Why should we ever put stock in what other people think if some of those people can’t see - or hear or whatever - beauty when it’s right in front of them?”

You grin but shoot back, “You’re attractive to everyone.”

Raising his eyebrows, looking straight into your eyes, he responds, “Does that include you then?” A careless group of girls bumping into you saves you from having to decide how much of a joking tone to put on your response. You didn’t find Sirius attractive. You found Sirius the most beautiful person you’d ever met, in senses that went far beyond his impeccable hair, his striking grey eyes, his pronounced cheekbones.

He holds you closer protectively at the jostling crowd, turns to ask for your drinks, and begins absentmindedly stroking your shoulder as he does so.

“No wonder you always wear this,” he says, pinching your jumper, “It’s so bloody soft.”

You had no idea he ever remembered or even noticed what you wore. Marlene, sure. Marlene was making a statement every time she stepped out of the house. And her face and body punctuated that statement with a big exclamation mark. But you? You hardly ever got that kind of attention. Maybe a “nice shirt” when you wore a particularly fun pattern, but that was about it.

You notice him looking at your torso as he says this and swear his eyes linger on your chest. You’re worrying he can tell it’s tighter than usual, so you tug at the hem, but when he looks quickly away, you try not to make too much of it.

You’re having loads of fun with your friends, swapping stories, sharing shots, occasionally shouting the lyrics to the good songs that come on. You and Sirius — who’s standing next you, his arm perpetually around you, much to the dismay of the many girls and few guys who come flirting — have a habit of turning to each other every time a new song comes on, deciding in unison whether it’s a good or bad one. The very occasional disagreement yields the most fun arguments, always along the lines of “You think this isn’t rubbish? You’re making me question our entire friendship here, love. I don’t know if I can trust you anymore.” (Sirius) or “Oh, come on. This sounds exactly like every other song in the genre but mediocre. Not everything has to be original, but it’d be nice if it weren’t typical and trash.” (You)

Then some new Bowie comes on. And Sirius looks as though he’s just received the greatest news of his life.

Cold fire, you’ve got everything but cold fire / You will be my rest and peace child, rings out Bowie’s electric voice. “Come dance with me!” Sirius bursts at you, hardly asking, dragging you by the hand to where a few (mostly quite drunk) people were dancing. He’s holding both your hands, and you’re moving together organically, falling into a languid rhythm with each other and the song. By the next line, Sirius is singing along, and as he sings with Bowie, “I moved up to take a place… Near you,” he shuffles closer to you seductively, looking nowhere but into your eyes as he places your hand on his shoulder and moves his own to your hip.

He’s theatrical with every lyric, each of which he knows by heart; “So tired,” he swoons; “It’s the sky that makes you feel tried,” he belts looking up toward the ceiling; “It’s a trick to make you see wide,” his eyes come back to yours, open wide and full of mirth; “It can all but break your heart…,” he steps closer to you again; “… In pieces,” he swoons again, this time onto your shoulder, leaning on you and holding you close. You’re too busy laughing both with and at him to be able to sing along yourself.

“Staying back in your memory… Are the movies in the past,” he continues, acting less and dancing smoothly with you, spinning you around and catching you close afterward.

He’s staring into your eyes, his face very close to yours as he sings, much more softly now, swaying slowly more than dancing, “How you moved is all it takes… to sing a song of when I loved… the prettiest star.” His hands squeeze you as he says those last three words.

He gives you another playful spin and goes on, “One day… though it might as well be someday… you and I will rise up all the way… all because of what you are…” Then, for the first time in the whole song, he and Bowie don’t synchronize. As Bowie finishes the line over the speakers, “the prettiest star,” you distinctly hear — and see, since his lips are so close to you after all — Sirius finish, “my prettiest star.”

The rest of the world has all melted away by this point; all that’s left is Sirius; all you can hear is the song, his voice, your frantic heartbeat in your ears. His hand comes to your face, caressing your cheek then resting there.

You have no idea how to react. Sirius flirted with you often. But Sirius flirted with everyone often. It was just a quirk of his personality. And Sirius touched you often. But it was never this gentle, this intimate. You don’t want to get your hopes up. Because as much as — or perhaps because of how much — you love him, you can’t really believe he’d see you that way. You’ve let yourself entertain the idea many times, sure, even suspected from time to time over the years of your friendship that maybe just maybe your desire was mutual, but ultimately, your fears and doubts — doubled every time a girl half your size who could so easily be on any billboard flirted with Sirius — would win out and push those thoughts and feelings down.

Your rhythmic swaying, your prolonged eye contact, your bursting heart and muddled mind continued through the end of the song. Though you knew it must have been about a minute and a half, it had felt like hours, time expanded by both bliss and trepidation, by the time the music changed and you broke apart. As you do, Sirius just watches you, as if searching for something.

You’re fidgeting with the sleeves of your jumper when you whisper, “That was fun,” and give him a quick hug, not letting yourself linger and pulling back before his arms were comfortably around you.

You have plans with Sirius the next day, and as you’re getting ready, you can’t help but remember back to his comment on your jumper last night, more worried at your appearance now that you think he noticed it more than you did before. You’re standing in your room in just your underwear stressing out over what to wear. You’ve put on your best bra, the one that does the most to help your figure without being too uncomfortable, and you’ve made a mess of your knickers drawer looking for a clean pair of high-waisted ones.

There was a time you would’ve avoided looking in the mirror at this stage, but now, you stand in front of it and give yourself a serious look. You suck your stomach in, and pull a bit with your hands on your hips, then let it all go, contemplating the difference. You turn to your profile, admiring the curves of your chest and your arse, but wishing there was less of your thighs immediately after. Arching your back and grabbing your arse, you wonder whether anyone — you close your eyes and admit to yourself: no, not anyone, Sirius — whether Sirius would find this, would find you attractive. As you take a deep breath, you lament how thinking of others’ opinions always made it so much harder to look at yourself with loving eyes. You didn’t hate your body, but your frequent worries that others would brought you down on more days than you wanted to admit.

You put on your favorite jeans, but as you go to choose a top, you remember one you’d borrowed from Lily a few months ago that had looked good. It was quite loose on her and a bit tight on you, but you each pulled it off differently. You ask her for it, and she happily obliges, but when you put it on, a knot turns in your stomach. It’s way too tight. The pattern is stretched; your boobs look huge; it somehow brings out rather than covers the fat on your sides. Taking it off in a hurry, you have to take another long, calming breath to keep tears of frustration at bay.

After finally finding something of yours that worked, giving the top back to Lily with a quick “Thanks, but it didn’t look as good as last time,” and giving yourself too many “final” glances in the mirror, you bundle up as you head into the windy afternoon.

You meet Sirius at the record shop near his flat. You see him before he sees you. He’s browsing the racks, and per usual, he looks effortlessly cool and unreasonably attractive. His long fingers are accentuated by his several silver rings as he flips through the records. He pushes his long hair out of his eyes in a careless gesture, and you’re almost angry at how it falls so perfectly he might as well have just spent an hour in front of a mirror.

You’re approaching him when a cute girl in a hot crop top walks up to him. She steps closer to him than any normal interaction would warrant. “Anything I can help you find, handsome?” she asks, and you wonder whether you’re imagining the twinge of a double meaning in the question. Maybe she’s just a flirty person doing her job. “We have a few special ones in the stock room I could show you…” Nope, not just doing her job. “Thanks, sweetheart, but I’m waiting for someone.” As he looks away from her back toward the records, he catches you in his peripherals. He smiles a beaming smile at you and gestures you over.

“You’re not going to believe what I found,” he begins enthusiastically. You hug; it lingers, and he squeezes you lovingly. “Mm, you smell nice,” he adds, as if it’s a normal thing to say. Is it a normal thing to say? Maybe it is. Maybe you’re overthinking, especially after the moment you shared last night.

“Thanks, new shampoo. What’d you find?” You look toward the records to ease the tension you were probably creating.

“Check this out.” If he noticed any awkwardness, he definitely doesn’t show it. He pulls out a record you had recently had a long conversation about.

“Brilliant!” you react, snatching it from him and turning it over in your hands, reading its contents eagerly.

He chuckles at you, and if you’d been looking at him instead of the record, you might have seen the accompanying adoring look.

“I know. It’s our lucky day.”

You browse around the shop together, chatting easily, both about music and all sorts of random things that came to mind. Talking to Sirius is always easy, always gives you more than the contents of the conversation to hold onto, to fill you up.

You go to pay, and the girl from earlier is working the till. Sirius goes to the loo, so it’s just you and her when you hand her a couple of records to ring up.

“Cool choices.” “Thanks.” “Is that your boyfriend?” she asks, nodding behind her toward the toilets.

“Oh, um,” you stutter. You’re not exactly sure why “no” doesn’t just easily come to your mouth. “I don’t know how you managed it. Lucky bitch,” she half laughs. You’re mortified; you can’t tell for sure, but you think she is trying to be friendly, just in a very strange record-shop-employee, rock and roll kind of way.

Sirius comes back around, and you hope to hell he hasn’t heard anything.

“All good, darling?” he asks, putting his arm around you. This wasn’t unusual for him, the nickname, the contact. But you’re already in an uncomfortable headspace, and your first thought is that you hope he isn’t doing it as an act for her benefit. You don’t even know if he’d heard, and your anxiety is taking over anyway. You keep running the woman’s words over in your head. How had she meant it? Did she mean she couldn’t believe you had managed it? As in specific, chubby, you? Or was she just making girly conversation? Would she have said the same to any woman, no matter how attractive, who had come into the shop with Sirius?

“You alright?” Sirius’s voice breaks you out of your spiraling. You look over at him, and his gaze is gentle but concerned.

“Yeah, fine, sorry,” you reply quickly. “It’s all good,” he smiles comfortingly at you.

Once outside the shop, you debate your next move. Normally on weekends when you’d get records, you’d then go eat, then go to his and listen to some of them, sometimes sharing a blunt, sometimes just getting high on the music.

You’re both looking up into the newly drizzling sky when Sirius says, “How about, we get take-away somewhere close, then just eat at mine? It looks like it’ll get worse soon, but I reckon we can make it before it really starts up.”

“Yeah, great.”

You’ve made it only a few blocks, though, when the rain pours down in sudden torrents.

“Oh, shit!” he laughingly yells, protecting the records, taking your hand, and sprinting to the nearest protective awning. By the time you make it, you’re both already extremely wet, and the weather is so windy the cover hardly helps in keeping it from getting even worse.

You’re squeezing as close to the wall as possible, standing chest to chest, the records between you, his arm around your waist, your faces close enough for you to see each individual drop as it travels down his face. His eyes match the sky behind him, and you silently marvel at his beauty. He looks up for a second then is overtaken by heartfelt laughter.

“Didn’t quite gauge that one right, I guess,” he chuckles. You’re laughing with him when a particularly strong gust blows freezing water forcefully at you, making you gasp and stiffen.

“Shit,” he laughs. “Let’s make a run for it.” He takes your hand again, and you both jog the few blocks to his flat.

You’re both still giggly when you step inside, leaving a puddle in the doorway where you stand. You take off your shoes and outer layers, but you’re drenched all the way through.

“Bloody hell, it’s freezing,” he amusedly complains, stripping down to only his jeans, leaving his clothes in a pile by the door. He hugs himself and rubs his arms, trying to warm up, and you’re glad your soaked demeanour is already such a mess he probably can’t tell how flustered you are by how attractive — and bare — he is. He reaches over to you and rubs your arms like he had been doing his. “Fuck, you’re freezing too. Come to my room, and I’ll lend you something to wear.” Your giddy mood dissipates immediately. There was no way in hell his clothes would fit you. He was obviously leaner than you, and your hips and thighs hadn’t gotten along well with men’s clothes even in your thinnest of states. He’s halfway to his room already, and you’re frozen by the door. “Y/N?”

You look over. You hope he doesn’t notice your eyes quickly travel his bare torso. “You coming or what?” he keeps on casually. When you get to his room, he’s bringing some towels out of the bathroom and throws you one. You start drying your hair as he rummages in his drawers. “Um,” you start. You sound more nervous than you mean to. He clearly notices because he immediately turns back to look at you to see what’s going on. “What is it?”

You hate worrying him like this, especially over something so stupid. Why did you always have to make things uncomfortable? Or better yet, why couldn’t you just be a girl who would fit in his clothes. “Hey, what is it?” he repeats, gentler this time, coming over to rest his hands on your shoulders. Your self-deprecating, cruel inner monologue is clearly showing more than you’d hope. “You alright, love?” “Yeah, no, I’m fine, sorry,” you try to laugh it off. “Don’t apologise.” It’s gentle, not scolding. “Just talk to me.” His hands continue rubbing your shoulders lovingly. “Just that I think I’m fine like this is all. Don’t worry about finding stuff for me,” you try. “Don’t be ridiculous; you’ll freeze to death. It’s fine; I don’t mind.” He goes back toward his dresser.

Ugh, how do you say “It’s not about your minding, actually. It’s about my stretching and ruining anything you could possibly lend me” without sounding weird and embarrassing?

“Thanks. Um, I’m not quite sure anything of yours would fit me though.” “We’ll find something,” he says relaxedly, opening another drawer. “Here, this one is really warm and comfy, and it’ll definitely fit,” he says, tossing you a sweatshirt. You recognize it, have seen him wearing it before. He only ever wore it while lounging at home, and it was quite big on him, so maybe it would be okay.

“And… uh,” he rummages, “try these. They’re a bit small, but they’re stretchy.” He hands you a pair of sweatpants. You’ve never seen him wear these. They would probably be too big on him. He grabs his towel and some clothes for himself.

“I’ll go change in the living room. Just come out when you’re ready. Grab whatever you want.” His tone is friendly, at ease. Unlike your feelings. You are freaking out. As soon as he closes the door, you strip down to your knickers, which thankfully aren’t very wet, at top speed, thinking you should hurry in case it takes you time to figure out the clothes. You don’t want to take too long and make things awkward. You towel yourself off and slip on the sweatshirt. It fits fine. It isn’t loose like it is on him, but it doesn’t look too weird. And it is indeed warm and comfy. Now for the more concerning part: you try pulling the pants on, a repeating “please, please, please” playing in your head. Fuck. No luck. They stop a bit above your mid-thigh, and there is no way you’d be able to pull them all the way up. You think of putting your jeans back on, but they are drenched, and it would’ve been like trying to get back into a heavy straight-jacket. You start panicking, unsure what to do, already worrying you are taking too long to come out. You look through his drawers, but all his other bottoms look even smaller. You try just wrapping the towel around your hips, but you look quite strange in the mirror.

You’re pacing in his room when he knocks. “Y/N? You alright? No rush, really, just making sure everything’s okay?”

You brace yourself, go to the door, and crack it open, hiding your body behind it, just popping your head around. He’s standing there, his wet hair half tied up, a dry t-shirt and sweats on.

“Um… the sweatpants don’t fit,” you whisper, embarrassed.

“Oh. Uh, that’s okay. Um, how about…,” he looks around, as if bigger pants would magically materialise somewhere in his living room. “Oh, perfect.” What could possibly be perfect right now? “Your favourite blanket is already on the sofa. How about I turn around, and you can just go get under it, and I’ll hang your trousers on my heater.”

You nod timidly, the warmth in your cheeks from your embarrassment blazing even hotter at the thought of how sweet he always is to you.

“Great. Uh, ok,” he chuckles, awkwardly turning around. You scamper to his sofa in your underwear, quickly covering your legs with his big cosy blanket.

“Ok,” you let out softly. He turns around and looks you over. You can’t tell what’s in his eyes as he does so, but there is an intensity there that you’re not used to. He blinks quickly and gives you a strange, strained smile. He disappears into his room, and you hear him sorting your clothes out to dry.

You’re fidgeting with the sleeves of his sweatshirt when he returns.

“You alright? Comfortable?” he asks, seemingly back to normal.

“Yeah, I’m good. Sorry, I didn’t meat to, uh, well, sorry I’m a bit difficult,” you reply a bit awkwardly, not knowing what exactly to apologise for but feeling the need to. “Don’t be ridiculous, love. You have nothing to be sorry for. Really. If you’re okay like this, then we’re all good, right?” You can’t help but worry what will happen as soon as you have to get up. Would you wrap the blanket around yourself like a weirdo? As if reading your thoughts, Sirius goes on playfully, “I’ll wait on you like royalty so you don’t even have to get up.” You make an odd half laugh, half relieved exhale sound in response, and he just chuckles. “Starting with…” he fast walks over to the door, grabs the bag of records and brings it back over to the sofa, sitting next to you but not getting under the same blanket like he usually does. “Which do you want to listen to first?” he asks, bringing them all out to look at together.

As soon as you started discussing it, it’s like waking up from a nightmare, realising all is well and returning to a calm normality. You debate and joke, decide on a record, and he gets up to put it on and make some tea, still chatting casually to you throughout.

When he’s back on the sofa with you, he looks down, smiles, and says, “Looks better on you than on me.” You tug on the sweatshirt self-consciously, smiling shyly at him. You fall into your easy rhythm, listening, talking, laughing, and before you knew it, the whole record’s played. Sirius gets up, walking toward his collection rather than the small stack of new records on the table. He picks one easily, and puts it on. The quirky piano of Bowie’s “Time” begins, and your heart speeds up. You love this album. So does Sirius. But this isn’t the first track. It’s the first track on the B-side, and the next song after this, you remember, is “The Prettiest Star,” the song you and Sirius danced to just last night. He doesn’t say anything until he’s seated next to you again. “I know we usually listen from the beginning, but the B-side is better on this one, and I didn’t feel like being patient.” His tone is playful, but there’s a heaviness to it. He glances away from you and leans toward the table to take a sip of his tea.

“What’s your favourite track?” you ask, smiling. You’ve asked him this question innumerable times over the years, but you’ve never been as excited for his answer as this time, and you have a feeling you know what it’ll be.

“‘The Prettiest Star,’” he replies immediately, looking toward you again. As quickly as he had, he looks away again as he adds, “Because it reminds me of you… even before last night…” After a beat, he ventures a glance toward you, that same searching look from last night taking over his beautiful features.

Unlike last night, you don’t feel panicked — nervous, sure, but more than that, loved. “Last night felt pretty special,” you say. “Yeah?” He seems hopeful. “Yeah, it was.” His voice is serene, like he’s contemplating something utterly peaceful. “It’s funny, though,” you say, and he looks at you, his eyebrow quirked. “It’s really about you, isn’t it? Not me.” You laugh. He looks like he wants to laugh with you, a twinkle in his eye, clearly happy that you are happy, but confusion holds his expression. You explain, “Well, you’re ‘the prettiest star,’ aren’t you? You’re obviously prettier, the prettiest… and the brightest in the night sky in fact… ‘Sirius.’” You say his name with all the love you feel for him.

He leans toward you, taking your hand. He’s smiling, but there’s a sadness to it.

“You might not be named for a star, but you’re my prettiest star, Y/N.” He looks into your eyes. “You’re so beautiful.” His eyes scan your face. “It’s almost too bright to bear sometimes, to be honest, your beauty,” he adds, smiling more vividly now. He brings his other hand to your face, just as he did last night. But this time, his fingertips begin by taking their time tracing your features: your eyebrow first, your nose, your cheekbone, down to your jaw. His thumb grazes your lip, barely touching it but lingering there, before moving to caress you cheek. “You’re so beautiful, my prettiest star,” he repeats, as the song begins in the background.

“Sirius,” you whisper, squeezing his hand.

“Darling girl,” he responds, moving closer to you until your foreheads meet. Your nose nuzzles his, and you stay like this for several seconds. You bring your hand to the crook of his neck, and holding him, you lean forward. The song goes silent, the intro ending, the anticipation built, and right as Bowie’s voice comes in, your lips meet.

Sirius’s hand slips from the side of your face to the back of your head, holding you firmly, leaning into you hungrily. His hand holding yours goes to your waist, pulling you close to him until your chest is flush with his. You wrap your arms around his neck and slip your fingers into his hair.

He moans into your mouth, and you deepen the kiss, pushing his tongue with yours, breaching into his mouth. He lets you, and as you explore him, he pulls your body until you find yourself kneeling on the sofa in front of him, the blanket fallen to the floor.

You pull back momentarily, and he stills his movements, watching you, waiting for your cue for what to do next. His eyes are lidded, his pupils blown, his lips parted, but you know that if you sat back down and told him you just wanted to listen to the record, that’s exactly what he’d do. But that’s not what you want. So, you lean forward and pick up your exploration right where you left it. He groans appreciatively and sucks on your tongue in his mouth, before pulling you on top of him.

You’re straddling him, and you’re so attracted to him you’re drowning in it, but even still, your nerves are there. You feel heavy. Too heavy to be sitting on top of him like this. He keeps his hands on your waist and strokes your back, not venturing any further down, pulling back to look at you. You shift clumsily, trying to put more of your weight on your knees on the sofa, but not being able to without spreading awkwardly wider or ending up lopsided. He holds you firmly, centering you again, hugging you close. “I don’t want you to be uncomfortable,” you whisper, trying to explain what he’s already figured out.

He can’t help the chuckle that escapes him before he says, “Trust me, darling, I’m about as far form uncomfortable as a person can be right now.” He squeezes you lovingly, clearly careful to squeeze all of you and not just any specific place, which might make you uncomfortable. “I’ve been going absolutely mental this whole time just knowing you weren’t wearing anything but your knickers under that blanket.”

“You have?” you ask, surprised, your eyes wide, your voice soft. He giggles again, always adoring, never mocking. “Fuck, how can someone be so adorable and so sexy at the same time?” It baffles you how someone can say the word “sexy” so seriously and not sound silly at all, give it so much confidence that it just sounds so, well, so sexy. He pecks your lips. “You’re going to kill me, woman.” Now you laugh.

“Oh?” “Mm,” he groans affirmatively as he runs his hands up your sides and back and kisses you ardently. He moves to your jaw, kissing languidly down to your ear, where he nips playfully and sucks on your neck another moment before looking into your eyes again and saying, “Fuck, Y/N, tell me you want this too.” A kiss. “I’m desperate for you.” Another kiss. “But only if you want me too.” Another kiss, longer this time. “I want to make you feel good, darling. Fuck, I can make you feel so so good.” Your hips grind down on his at his words, and he throws his head back in a lustful groan, and his hands squeeze you tightly where they hold you. He recovers, stroking your back again and resting his forehead on yours as he asks, “Can I touch you, Y/N? I’ll stop anytime you say so, but I’m dying to worship you.” You kiss him deeply, holding him close, grinding your hips down again. “I want you to touch me, Siri.” At this, his mouth immediately devours yours, and his hands come down to squeeze your arse. He kneads it roughly, pulling you into him with each motion, inadvertently pushing his hips up a bit each time to meet yours. You feel the hard, evident bulge in his pants underneath you, and it turns you on even more to feel wanted in such a visceral way. There is no missing how much his body wants yours, and that surprises but arouses you to no end.

His hands come down to your thighs, and you gasp and stiffen a bit. He stops but leaves his hand there, stroking you cautiously.

“Y/N?” He bumps your nose with his. “I…” You peck his lips. “You really don’t mind my body?” you ask, your voice small.

“Darling,” he breaks a little. “Mind it? I adore it. Can’t you feel what you do to me?” he half jokes, thrusting up into you. You close your eyes and bite your lower lip at the addictive friction. “Y/N. Look at me, love,” he whispers. You do. “I think you are the most gorgeous, sexiest woman in the world. Of course it’s all intertwined with how much I love you, but that just makes it even better. God, you have no idea how much you turn me on.” He kisses you short but hard. “I never want to tell you how to feel, love, but I just wish you knew how beautiful you are, how you are the most beautiful to me.” You kiss him again and become immersed in it fully. Your tongues are dancing with each other, your hips, your hands, moving in tandem with each other, melting into each other in a perfect push and pull.

His hands slip under his sweatshirt, and he whispers, “Can I?” You don’t hesitate, entrusting yourself to him, and detaching yourself from him only enough for him to slip it over your head. His hands come to your breasts, and you hear him say “fuck” again as he kneads them and keeps kissing you. His hands keep massaging as his mouth moves down your jaw wetly. He takes his time moving down your body, sucking your neck, licking across your sternum, kissing delicately down to between your breasts. He buries his face there and moans, and it’s so hot you pull him to you and scratch his scalp where you’re holding him by his hair. He kisses there again then his fingers move to pinch your nipples. He mixes pulling it with massaging your whole breast with one hand, but the other just grips your tit as his mouth wraps around your nipple. His tongue licks around it a few times before he sucks on it, and his groan is drowned out by your pleasured yell.

“Fuck, Sirius,” you say, your voice a rasp.

“Mmm,” he responds, not letting up, switching breasts after sucking a bit harder. Once he’s satisfied (for now) and your nipples are hard and sore, he grips your tits again with his hands and licks into your mouth.

“Fuck, baby, you have the most incredible tits.” He squeezes them. “You have no idea how many times I’ve dreamt of taking your shirt off and touching you.” He goes back down and gives each a quick but delicious suck. “Let’s go to my bed, yeah?” You nod heatedly.

You’re a bit self-conscious as you move to get off of him, more aware of your body beyond the pleasure again though you had been so lost in it just a moment ago you’d forgotten about everything else. Sirius helps you off and up, his hands on your hips, and he pulls you into him as you both stand, making out with you before squeezing your arse as he pulls away to walk to his bedroom. You wrap your arms around yourself as you walk with him, but when you’re standing in front of the bed, he takes each of your hands in his and kisses you while holding them, bringing his body flush with yours. You break the contact to pull on his shirt, and he eagerly obliges, removing it and tossing it aside.

He guides you onto the bed, his body following on top of yours, your mouths connected the whole time. You shuffle up the bed then tug his sweats down when you’re settled. He helps you, shimmying out of them. They get caught on one of his ankles, and you both laugh as he curses and contorts awkwardly to pull them all the way off.

You’re both left only in your underwear as he starts kissing you again, slowly making his way down your body. He spends a lingering amount of time on your tits again as he goes down then keeps kissing down your stomach to the waistband of your knickers. He looks up at you for any hesitation, but you just bite your lip and lift your hips. He smirks in excitement as he pulls your panties off of you. He does it slowly, teasingly, and he licks down your thigh tracing where the fabric passes. Once they’re off, he pushes your knees a bit further apart and starts kissing and licking his way back up. He sucks at the top of your thigh, and it makes a pop as he separates from you.

Kneeling between your legs, massaging your thighs on either side of him, he says, “You drive me mad, Y/N. You’re so fucking delicious, I could spend eternity between these thighs.” You squirm at his graphic words, already exceptionally strung out. He chuckles lowly down at you and kisses you quickly before adjusting himself with his head between your thighs.

“Today really is my lucky day,” he says, face lined up with your cunt. “This is the second time I see you drenched today, and I fucking love being the cause of it this time.” Without further ado, he licks a sopping stripe from your entrance up to your clit. Even this first motion sounds wet. You’re sure you’ve never been so wet in your life.

Sirius buries his face in your cunt, groaning as he licks into you then sucks on your lips. He goes back and forth between sucking on you and fucking you with his tongue. He keeps playing with you until you’re squirming before bringing his mouth directly to your clit. He’d grazed it as he licked you before now, bumped you with his nose, teasing you, but now he gives it his full attention. He’s licking and sucking, moaning all the while like you’re the most delicious thing he’s ever eaten, moving his whole body with the passion of it, and it takes very little more for you to start cumming on his mouth. You make a yelping sound you’ve never made before in your ecstasy, and with your eyes closed, you feel as if the world is a million miles away; all you feel is your body and where it is connected to Sirius’s. He keeps up his motions and fervor until your pleasured squirming turns into overstimulation squirming. He gives you one last lick and suck then shuffles up your body, kissing it intermittently as he does, until he’s face to face with you, smiling a smile you’ve never seen before.

“Hello, darling,” he says, clearly satisfied with himself, kissing you.

“Hi,” you sigh, sounding completely fucked out. He giggles at you and kisses you again.

“Feel good?”

“Mmhhmm.” You stretch underneath him and languidly wrap your arms around him, licking his lips slowly before kissing him again.

“Fuck,” he responds.

“Yes, please.” Your voice is high, blissful. You rut up into him. He chuckles at you and strokes your hairline, kissing your forehead.

“You want to? You’re alright?” “Of course, Siri. I’m brilliant.” “That you are, my love,” he beams at you then pushes his pants off. “My prettiest star,” he says, as he pecks your lips then your nose then lines himself up with your entrance.

His eyes penetrate yours as he pushes into you. You moan in unison, and his mouth lingers just above yours, grazing your lips, your foreheads touching, as he slowly pushes deeper and deeper. When he bottoms out, he kisses you eagerly, stroking his tongue into your mouth as his cock ruts deep inside you. Your hands grip his back. His hands come down to your thighs one at a time, squeezing passionately before pushing your legs up and out, wrapping them around his waist.

Normally, you’d feel self-conscious in this position. Almost bent in half, your stomach protrudes between the two of you. Your thighs are thick at his sides. But the look on his face, the feel of the movements of his body is all love and adoration and ardor.

He kisses you as he thrusts a bit harder, keeping it slow at first but vigorously punctuating each thrust. One of his hands rests beside you, holding him up, but the other stayed on your leg, stroking your thigh and gripping your arse or hip bruisingly with each forceful motion of his hips.

“Fuck, baby,” he rasps, “You’re fucking perfect.” He thrusts hard, a gentle kiss on your forehead contrasting it seductively, then begins picking up his pace. He rests his face in the crook of your neck, nipping and sucking on it as he pounds repeatedly into you.

You’re gripping him tightly to stay in position, your arms and legs tense around him. You can’t move much, but his movements are enough for the both of you, especially as he brings his knees up a bit to get a new angle. He’s hitting your spot with almost every thrust, and you’re whining in pleasure in time with each. You squeeze hard around him, not just your arms and legs but the soft walls around his cock as well, and he groans animalistically into your skin. His hips stutter in response, but a moment later he’s pounding rhythmically again.

His breathing gets heavier, his muscles tighter, and with a broken gasp, he shifts sideways a bit to snake his hand between you to where you’re connected. He rubs harshly on your clit, not bothering to start slow, clearly aware he doesn’t have time for that. His hips piston even faster; his hand presses harder, and a few seconds later, you feel fit to burst. You let out a yell as you release around him, the most intense orgasm of your life making you see white stars.

“Sirius,” you half yell, half sigh. “I’m gonna cum, baby. Fuck, fuck. Where do you want me to?” he rushes out, his hips still moving fast in and out of you. You tighten your legs around him, and clench your cunt, pulling him into you. “Inside, Siri. Cum in me.” His immediate groan sounds strangled as you feel the warmth of him inside you. The words “cold fire” play in your mind. He thrusts a few more times then goes limp on top of you, panting loudly, kissing your neck and cheek between heavy breaths.

He rolls off but stays close, never fully breaking contact with you, and he wraps his arm around your waist, lightly stroking your back, as you both lie on your sides facing each other. You feel the urge to cover yourself up but resist it, trying to melt into the vulnerability. The utter adoration in his eyes when you look into them helps.

“I love you,” you whisper. He smiles a smile that makes his stormy eyes shine, leans in, and kisses you tenderly.

“And I love you,” he says matter-of-factly, his voice smooth and sappy.

You pause, contemplating, reveling in the joy of the moment but unable to ignore a tug in your stomach. “I’m sorry I was too… I don’t know, scared? to really show you before.”

“Don’t be, darling. I’m sorry I waited so long to really show you too, but I’m even more sorry if I ever made you doubt how much I do, how loved you are.” “You didn’t.” You shake your head then nuzzle his nose with yours. “I just sometimes didn’t understand. It’s confusing, how someone like you can love someone like me so much.” “Darling. It’s the least confusing thing in the world. You’re the most beautiful person I know. In all kinds of ways. And I’ll show you every day you’ll have me; you’ll see it clearly too; I’m sure of it. I’m just worried when you do, you’ll realise the real wonder is you loving me.” He laughs a bit, but you can hear the truth to his concern, his own insecurities surfacing.

You stroke his cheek, kiss him, and say, “We’ll both keep showing each other then. For always.” His smile is subtle, full of love.

He nods, kisses you again, pulls you into his body, and, hugging you close, repeats, “For always.”

P.S. notes: I try to keep my reader character inclusive, and this is a bit more specific than I usually do. I just want to acknowledge that everyone relates to their bodies, especially if they’re bigger, in different ways, and I in no way think of anything I write as a generalized take on being plus sized (or any other experience really). These are just things that I have felt in my life, and it has always meant a lot to me to see and hear stories about bigger characters, both when attention is brought to that specific aspect about them and when it isn’t. So, this is my way of adding to that and to write something for myself in that vein.

#marauders #marauder x reader #sirius black x reader #sirius black #sirius black imagine #sirius black one shot #smut #fluff #angst #friends to lovers #plus size!reader #fem!reader #reader insert #david bowie #ria250 #fanfiction

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i-hear-a-sound · 8 months

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Sort of dumb Drakengard and Nier stuff I find really really interesting

this will be long. and dumb. and probably wrong. under the readmore

This is an image of what the Alien’s ship looks like in Automata. And yes, it most definitely looks like a flower. Interesting thing is, aliens coming down in a ship shaped like a flower is something that sounds really familiar to the lore: of how in Drakengard, the Watchers came down with the Flower. (fact check me if that’s wrong though)

This image is faintly in every in-game cutscene in Drakengard. These are implied to be images from the universe’s altered Bible? (Christianity is the main religion in the game, it’s just altered with things like the Goddess the seals etc). Which, means, if you squint…

this image looks like a dragon impaled on a tower. It’s pixelated as fuck but higher quality images do confirm this. If I find one of those I’ll update it. (something something, timeloop is obvious)

These two scenes have been paralleled to death. Yes, the black box scene in Automata does look somewhat moderately kind of if you squint like the scene in which Caim pacts with Angelus, but let’s focus more on the ladder scene because something has always bugged me about it.

Firstly. The souls themselves. Maybe it’s just me… they look like egg cells? Which, no, I’m not going “Caimangelus had sex, good for them” I’m going “If this is the case, what else are referred to as “eggs” in this game?”

In the original version of the game in Japan, the Seeds of Destruction are not referred to as Seeds. They’re called eggs.

another thing. We get to see what happens when a seed is destroyed in ending C. And for a brief second, it looks like this:

Another thing about this scene. Something I also never noticed was that when he pulls out his soul, Caim’s chest does… this?

I’d gif it if i could but atm I cant, but believe me. Angelus just shoots it out from her mouth he just reaches into his chest like it’s liquid. And again, back to the ending C scene:

What does this imply?

…Jack shit lol I just think it’s interesting. Smiley face.

Accord is an incredibly mysterious character in the world of Drakenier. We know nothing of her origins, who created her, why she is at all, and the most we know is:

There is a lot of her. She was created in the “Kingdom of night”. She was created by “something like humans”. She studies singularities. Her goal is to prevent the fall-down. She’s a boob lover.

Something interesting to note is that, the character of Adam kind of somewhat maybe shares a lot of design parallels with Accord. Not even just in terms of the use of white/cream.

Adam has glasses, a black tie, and on one hand has a glove similar to what Accord has. In the anime he gets the same tattoo of the Cult of the Watcher’s Eve had in the game, and Accord is specifically stated to have taken an interest in the branch involving the cult’s creation.

But what’s weird is that Adam… is a machine. And accord isn’t. At least, she’s not supposed to be? Who knows. I have lots so say about Accord but most of it is just theorizing so I’ll leave that for another day.

But I want to talk about the other twin: Eve.

Weirdly enough, Eve and Brother Nier and to an extent, the Shadowlord, share a lot of similarities as well. Sure there’s the white hair, the fact they’re both siblings of someone, etc etc etc, but something I never noticed was how similar their attacks are. Thank the fucking sadfutago church thing for that one lol.

I mean… just the fact that these two not only share the same English VA, but that in the automata DLC for Replicant, the Shadowlord boss music is replaced by Dependent Weakling. (Fact check that for me too, it’s been a while)

Weird parallels all around.

These… doors. Why are they here?

for context, in a Drakengard level you stumble across just this… room with a couple random, red doors. Some of them are open. Some of them are not. I. Don’t. Know. Why. These. Are. Here.

(I mean I do… I very much do, but again. That’s theory.)

Anyways. Doors are actually mentioned in the game, in the final line for ending C. “A pitiful child shall defy the hands of the gods, and a door will close.”

Hmmm?? Thing to note: the “hands of the gods” are dragons. “A pitiful child shall defy the dragons, and a door will close.”

And to end off this post, a fun fact; before becoming the first intoner, Lady Zero had a different name. Rose.

#drakengard #nier #drakenier #nier automata #nier replicant #drakengard 1 #drakengard 3 #caim #accord #angelus #a2 #eve #adam #lady zero #intoner zero #2b #9s #kaine #AND IF I GOT ANY OF THIS WRONG PLEASE LET ME KNOW. I DONT WANNA BE DUMB AND ILL FIX IT IF I WAS :3

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leonskennedysfavoritewife · 1 year

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Rainy Night- Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Warnings: older!kinda mean!Eddie, recreational drug use, minimal talk of religion, smut, dirty talk.

Patter. Patter. Squelch.

Your shoes stuck into the mud with every pull, which you had to awkwardly combat with force. It was storming, which meant it was nice and loud - keeping your deep-sleeper parents in their beds and from hearing you sneak out of the window and into the shed to get your bike.

You were drenched and trudging up the stairs to Eddie Munson’s trailer- the rain hitting the tin roof loudly. Hopefully he would be able to hear you knock.

You curled up your hand into a fist, and gave a polite but firm knock to the door. You waited with no response. Just as you went to try again, the door swung open.

“The fuck are you doing here?” He asked you, pocketing a joint to his lips. He was wearing a worn out Metallica tee- along with grey baggy sweatpants.

You had heard a lot about Eddie from kids at school, mostly that he was a devil worshipper but you knew better. He was a 26 year old part-time drug dealer and tattoo artist.

Truthfully, you and Eddie were not on ‘showing up unbeknownst to someone’s home at 10 pm in pouring rain’ terms. In fact- Eddie seemed to never pay attention to you when your friends had bought from him, mostly because you were what he despised from his school days. A cheerleader type. A preppy little girl.

“I- I uh. I wanted to buy from you.”

Eddie poked his head out, looking around before grabbing you by the wrist and pulling you inside.

“You biked here in the rain for some weed?” He mumbled with the joint still in his mouth.

“Uh. Yeah. It’s no big deal. Just some rain.”

“Christ. Here, while I get your shit.” He slipped the joint into your lips, your hand barely catching it in time. You took a long puff, convincing enough to seem like you knew what you were doing- but Eddie knew better. You’re innocent- and he also knew better than a pastor’s daughter to have ever done this kinda thing. He was shocked you were even here to begin with.

You exhaled the smoke, a fuzzy feeling enveloping you along with a sting in your throat.

Eddie glanced back at you while he sorted through a mason jar filled with the stuff.

“So, what’s a little church girl like you showing up to my place?”

“I- I wanted to get to know you.” You told him truthfully, fumbling with your hands.

Eddie’s face softened into confusion.

“You’re kidding. Besides, I don’t think daddy would approve of that, you know.”

You played with your hands in front of you, staring up at him.

“You don’t have to pretend to want to be my friend for free weed, you know.”

“That’s not what I wa-“

“Okay. Why do you, a popular, preppy, and downright innocent girl, want to befriend me- an older man- if not to score without paying.”

You sighed, gripping the joint in between your damp lips and pulled your tote bag off of your shoulder. Clutching it, you snatch the zipper open with one hand. You materialized a small cassette that you had plastic-wrapped to keep from getting wet.

“Here.” You insisted, holding it out to Eddie.

“The fuck is that?” He asked.

“It’s a cassette. Arise by Sepultura. I bought it and listened to it over-and-over just so I could remember the songs. It’s yours, though.”

He looked at you, and down to the object in your hand. He took it from you, and pulled the plastic off, tossing it aside on the floor.

“Holy shit. Where did you manage to get this? It just came out and I haven’t been able to find it anywhere.”

“I have my ways.”

Eddie chuckled and went over the to stereo in the living room, popping the music in before turning it up to a decent volume. He was actually moved by your gesture- no girl had made effort to like anything that he did. They normally just wanted a dick appointment.

“Okay. Now that you’ve won me over, what next? Again, I’m sure your holier-than-thou father wouldn’t like you hanging out with me.”

“I don’t care what he thinks.” You took another drag of the joint, giving it back to Eddie.

“I’m 18 and have a job. I can easily get my own place if I wanted.”

Eddie chuckled and then pursed his lips around the well-rolled plant, causing you too stare a little too long at how his mouth looked wrapped around the drug.

“What’s the look for? You’re not going to try and seduce me for the weed, are you? It’s already yours.” He went to the counter, grabbing the baggie and shoving it into your hands.

“Might wanna get home before daddy notices you’re gone.” He moved his hands in a creepy motion at you, trying to make you nervous.

“And if I don’t want to?” You asked him, getting a little bold.

“Oooh, such a bad girl. What’s next, breaking your abstinence?” He eyed you with his slightly bloodshot and hazy eyes.

You squirmed at his prying question.

“How do you know that?” You looked a little pissed off, but more so embarrassed.

“Babydoll, all of you religious girls are usually uptight and don’t want to fuck. That’s just the way it is.” He scoffed, settling himself into the couch nearby.

“What if I’m not like that?” You peeled off your wet sweater, tossing it aside and leaving it on the floor to collect in it’s own water.

Eddie eyed your figure in the tanktop and way-too-short skirt. Sure, you had great boobs and the cold water had your nipples completely showing through- But Eddie was way more into ass and thighs, which yours were amazing. He should know, he’s spent a fair share of time sneaking glances before.

“You’re not fooling anyone, sweetheart. Just because you show up in your little skirt and offer me the best gift I’ve ever received- I’m not fucking you.” He sounded sarcastic but you knew he was serious.

“Okay. Sure. Why not?” You put a hand on your hip, trying to exude confidence.

“Because.” He stood up, putting his face close to yours,

“I’d ruin you.”

You pressed your thighs close together and tried to say something- but your brain had blown a fuse.

“See. Can’t even handle a few words. Let me guess. Your pussy is just aching for me right now?” He laughed, emphasizing the word.

“S-shut up, Munson.”

“Fine.” He had gotten his body way too close to you, and he could feel your warm breath hitching.

“Take your clothes off.” He demanded through gritted teeth.

You hesitantly started to strip the damp clothing away, but when you had your hands hooked around your underwear- he stopped you.

“Not those.”

He rubbed a hand over your hip, leaning in to plant his lips on yours. He liked the way the coconut lipgloss was barely noticeable to his tastebuds- and he could tell you didn’t have any idea what you were actually doing.

Once he felt that you has gotten the rhythm, he waggled his tongue into your mouth, rubbing it against your own. You let out a small moan into his mouth, and his grip on your side tightened. He pulled away.

“Turn around. Lean over and put your hands on the couch.”

“O-okay.” You did as you were told- and Eddie stifled a groan while admiring your ass and the way your black-lace underwear hugged against your bits, leaving nothing to his imagination.

“Where’d you get these? Surely your mommy wouldn’t let you buy such a thing.” He toyed with the fabric.

“I-I got them myself. I had to hide them.”

“Hm. You’re so devious, and here I thought you were a good girl. Are you?”

“Y-yes.” Your nervousness peaked now, you hadn’t known what to expect your first time- but it wasn’t this. (Not that you were complaining).

“Yes what?”

“I-I’m a good girl.”

He smirked to himself while he flipped you for him to climb over your form on the worn couch.

“You know, I like you a lot. And it just so happens that I might go easy on you. I want you to enjoy this fucking I’m about to give you.” He growled into your neck, planting kisses.

You ran your fingers into his hair, subconsciously pulling at it because of how good his trail of kisses felt.

“Fuck. You just want me to go rough on you, don’t you?” His hand traveled under your bra, squeezing your nipple and causing you to let out a small yelp. He slithered his hands to your back, gripping the clasp of your bra.

“You wanna keep going?”

“Y-yes. Please.” Eddie grinned to himself while unclasping the bra and throwing it aside.

He took in the sight of your breasts, silently thanking the god that may or may not exist.

“Fucking beautiful.” He groaned, hand pinching at your nipples. He liked the way you squirmed under him.

He took a hand and slipped it into your underwear, finding your bud and rubbing some of your juices onto it accordingly. He began rubbing soft circles.

You wriggled under him, moaning and still pulling at his hair.

“Fuck babydoll, you like that?”

“Mhm. ‘Feels good.” You tried your hardest to get the words out between your lewd noises.

Eddie pressed a mouth to your nipple, his tongue flicking over it like a lit candle. Your moans started to pick up at his pace, and you felt a strange feeling building up.

“Eddi-“

“Gonna cum, sweet girl?”

“I- uh- yes?” You half moaned/half questioned.

He removed his hand and his mouth from you, and pulled your underwear off- and then his shirt.

You admired his barely-there abs and his faint v-line. It made your face catch fire.

“Don’t worry. I’m not done with you yet, doll. I want you to cum on my cock. Can you do that for me?” He started away at his pants, pulling them completely off.

“Y-yes Eddie.”

“Christ. Say my name like that again and I might just bust right here.”

Eddie continued, removing his boxers. His dick flopped out, hitting against his belly.

You sat up on your elbows.

“Is… Is that going to fit?”

Eddie grinned down at you.

“Maybe. Maybe not. But I’ll make it fit.”

You swallowed your saliva, the situation settling in now.

“Don’t worry, sweet. You’re doing great. You ready?” He asked for your reassurance one more time. It was so unlike him to be sweet like this.

“Y-yes.”

He rubbed his cock against your folds, coating it before slowly slipping into your wet cunt.

You grabbed at Eddie’s back, immediately leaving scratches and moaning uncontrollably.

“Fuck Eddie Fuck! It’s too big!” You whined, writhing under him.

“Shhh, Baby. It’ll adjust. Just give it a second.”

Eddie was all the way in now, and you felt so full.

“Okay. I’m going to start moving now. You okay?”

You nodded, your face nuzzled into his shoulder.

He kissed the side of your head, and lifted his hips just to crash them against you again. The sound of his balls slapping against you is almost deafening.

“Holy fuck!” You moaned, the pain started to subside now but the slight stinging hadn’t yet. Eddie grabbed your legs, throwing them over his shoulders.

“Can’t hide that pretty face this way. I wanna see those expressions when I fuck you senseless.”

You nodded again, feeling more vulnerable now. He looked over you, stuffed full of him. He slammed back into you again.

“Fuck! More Eddie, more!”

Eddie quickened the pace, slapping and gushing sounds filling the room. He put a thumb to your clit, circling as he had done before. Your noises and breathing became all entangled with each other, along with the familiar heat in your belly. Eddie felt you tighten around him.

“That’s it, babydoll. Cum on my cock.”

“Oh my god!” You gritted through your teeth, bucking your hips up, unable to control the release.

Once you had slightly recuperated from your orgasm, Eddie held his hand on your stomach to keep you still. He started pumping in and out of you, slamming hard into your pussy each time. The pace and force sending shockwaves of pleasure through you.

Eddie slipped two fingers of his free hand into your mouth.

“Suck. Now.” You did as you were told, looking up at him.

“Shit. I’ll have to bring you over again so I can see you do that on my cock. That pretty mouth wrapped all around me. You’d like that wouldn’t you?”

“Y-yes Eddie.” Your teeth grazing his fingers.

“I know you would, coming all the way here just to let me fuck your chances of getting into heaven out of you. Such a good girl.”

His words somehow made you wetter than you thought possible, and you honestly didn’t care if any consequences right now.

“I’m gonna- fuck- cum in you, yeah?” He asked, huffing in between words.

“Fuck Eddie! Please fill me!” It sounded jumbled fron the digits in your mouth. And you hadn’t known where the words came from- probably the sex-drunk brain talking- but the way Eddie started moving even faster told you that it had an effect on him.

“Fuck. Fuck. I’m filling you up so good. Take it all.” You felt his dick twitching as he spilled into you. He rolled over, simultaneously pulling out of you and laying you on top of him.

After a moment had passed of the two of you heaving, he patted your back.

“Up.”

You stood, feeling him leak out of you.

“I had a great time doll, honestly. But I got work in the morning and you have school.”

“O-okay.” You felt a little disappointed to leave so soon, but he was right.

You collected all of your clothes- except your panties, unable to find them.

“If you’re looking for those-“ he pulled the underwear from the couch cushions.

“I’ll be keeping these. You can get ‘em when you come back. Maybe.”

“Eddie! I have to bike home! I’m not sitting bare on my bike.” You crossed your arms, thinking you’d be in deep shit if anyone saw you on the way home.

“Too fucking bad.”

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