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#i can completely see why people dont like her but i still do... its such a tragic story about someone who never let anyone in and
seariii · 5 months
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i know everyone is really mad at kotoko, but i’ve been thinking a bit about why she ended up like this
I have a friend who has a really similar mindset to kotoko, so i'm kinda familiarized with how it works. as i've said before, she really sees everything in black and white, and while she originally said she would forgive those who did the same as her (basically amane, and fuuta to some extent), after her t1 inno verdict, her ideals got reinforced, well, more like radicalized and pushed them a step further, losing her original self/mindset in the process
every time i talk to this friend about kotoko, they really do see themselves in kotoko, and with everything currently going on (and them going to therapy and trying to be a better person, and just getting bad looks from others when they talk) has made them notice how some stuff isn't that good or how it's frowned upon. my friend has a black and white sense of justice, and when i told them about how kotoko would’ve harm amane, they went “it's good to know she wouldn't spare the child” (i know, messed up). their context to that is, we all know how children can be some of the most horrible people in earth, innocence can be seen as beautiful, but it can also be terrifying. their argument is that when children commit a crime, they're not trial respectively to what they committed, a child who killed someone doesn't get the same repercussions as an adult who killed someone. 
having said that, that mindset comes from a place of black and white morals, of difficulties during childhood, of seeing how people arent brought to justice and of how one suffers so much but no one cares. this friend struggles with empathy and struggles to understand others in general. the main difference they have with kotoko is that they try, that they were put in situations where they had to face reality and other people 
i believe kotoko must’ve went through something that in the end pushed her to this belief system. “it doesnt excuse what she did” i know, but i still think if she have had someone to guide her towards the right path, someone who she actually connected with and showed her why her actions and beliefs were harmful, this wouldn't have ended like this… 
now here, im not asking people to forgive her, i actually think that a guilty verdict this trial would be really good for her and hopefully would force her to face reality in some way
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nightfallsystem · 23 days
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u guys ever think about killing urself for everyone elses sake.
just so people wont have to go thru the annoyance of talking to me or the disgust of seeing my face so they can be happier by talking to their other friends instead of me so they dont have to deal with my actual fucking stupidity
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dylandrhodes · 2 years
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#ppl are so so critical of this season#like it wasnt perfect no#but i think its still a fantastic show#it highlights the values of friendship and bravery#i dont know why people wanted? or expected other characters to die such as steve/robin/nancy etc#max’s ‘death’ had the right impact it gives something for the kids to fight for- to get her back#opens a link to her and venca? theres lots of potential there#and how brave she was to do that to save her friends/town#and the way that highlighted her relationship with lucas such a powrful scene#and i hated eddies death ok sobbing but again it kinda made sense i hate to say it#like he died saving dustin and keeping the bats from the others#he chose to be brave and not hide and go out fighting#and ultimately it would have been hard to do much wirh his character if he lived right? he would have been arrested for those deaths#and he died helping get revenge for Chrissy#it was heartbreaking but also the emotion the ending of the season needed#idk i just am seeing so so much hate#but i feel like its positioned to give us a lot more in season 5#also i loved el’s progression this season#understanding completely what she can do and where she came from/that ahe created the upside down essentially#anyway lol dont hate me for this yall#there are def parts that could have been done better/needed better writing but#i also really love this show and think it gave us a lot considering the high stakes ending#im excited for the last 2 eps in season 5
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confusedsiewmai · 2 months
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almalvo · 10 months
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About An Official Spiderverse Artist...
Please do not just scroll past this post; read it.
If you guys follow me on twitter, you probably already know.
But if you dont or still want to read this anyway - here you go:
I aint big, but I got a growing platform that I see as important for me to use as a force for things that matter.
So here I am.
And I got something to say about a certain "artist".
There are so many fucked up people who call themselves artists who are so heavily worshipped by us who both get and or dont get outed in the world for things they do and for their general piss-poor behaviours and persons.
Im here to talk about one in particular (and certainly wont be the last).
There is an artist that basically EVERYONE here has seen art from before, printed in the official Sony artbooks too.
If you have seen this:
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Then you have seen this artist before.
His name is Alberto Mielgo. He goes by @/pinkman_himself on twitter.
He is a HUGE part of the art direction and stylisation of the spiderverse movies, if that isnt already obvious. Because he was the former original art director of Into The Spiderverse.
Yes. Former.
Cuz he got "mYsTeRiOuSlY fiReD" from Sony 2 years into pre-production and completely removed from the project.
You may have also seen this character before:
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Yes. THAT asian character from Netflix's Love Death + Robots, from the episode "The Witness".
Familiar? Yeah. Because this episode was also made by the same guy, Mielgo.
I aint going to talk about what happens in that episode and hesitate to encourage anyone to watch it - cuz all it basically is is a megalo-misogynistic, assault "glorified for the sake of aRtT", racially fetishised showcase of this crazy makeup/haired bdsm stereotyped asian girl sex worker who essentially gets murdered over and over and over after running for her life completely naked through the city for all of us to see for some fucking reason.
BUt yeah anyways, you can see it in the first pic, but Ill put it here to show more clearly - this here is NOT the character from LDR. But I can understand why you might think so:
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Yeah. You read that name in the bottom right corner correctly. This is Peni Parker. His concept art of Peni Parker. A 13 YEAR OLD CHILD. Lookin suspiciously like and dressed as the adult person from LDR with ALSO the crazy hair, make up - WITH AN O-RING CHOKER AND BALL-GAG LIPSTICK (BDSM).
13. year. old. child.
This man only sees east asian women this way.
He likes them crazy, sexy, broken--
and young.
Cuz this man also wrote this on a now-deleted post on his website:
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Yeah. He, this whole ass middle-aged white cishet male spaniard thirstin for kids since he was 18 for 12 year old girls.
Cuz 12 year old girls are a fuckin "KNOCK OUT" when they grow up, when they ripen up into adulthood, to this man Alberto Mielgo, aka @/pinkman_himself, this creature.
And if auctioning NFTs isnt bad enough (cuz yes, ofc he does that too - its literally the first option on his website) -
His entire fucking portfolio is of drawing women he had sex with.
His fucking PROFESSIONAL PORTFOLIO is all of painting and drawing women in very compromising, questionable ways of the VERY SAME WOMEN HE HAD SLEPT WITH THROUGH HIS LIFE.
They look as creepy as they are.
But the scariest part?
While I myself had only just found out about this some days ago as of writing this, some of us have known about this man and his antics for years.
And he keeps getting greenlit by the industry, over and over and over; winning awards, getting respected, praised, admired, even by fellow at-home artists like many of you out there if you dont already do so.
And nothing will happen to him cuz he is a white cishet male artist who has money and a following and connections and influence and power.
So yeah.
I just wanted to talk about a certain official Spiderverse artist to just let yall know there are freaks everywhere, and that no matter how small it is, it's people like me and you who need to do what we can to keep up awareness and warn our communities and protect our most vulnerable.
My suggestion is to take heed of what I said, ask questions about everything you will ever see again from anyone around you, no less the industry, THINK for once, and actually give a fuck.
Keep away.
Do not support this man.
But the decision is ultimately yours.
Stay awake, yall.
-------
(His face, publicly available as his imdb profile):
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scary.
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astarionancuntnin · 3 months
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listen, obviously i love astarion for multiple reasons, but ironically when i first started the game i wasnt interested in him, at all. i was fully commited to finding karlach and dating her bc of what i had seen online about her. i had barely heard or seen anything about him other than him being "the flirty vampire" and i was like eh okay
i ended up keeping him in my party cause his remarks were hilarious and i really vibed with his energy. and then he started opening up and you get to see how the whole overconfidence and flirting was an act, he starts talking about cazador and what he went through and how determinate he is to take him down. he keeps mentioning how he cannot wait to get rid of his master and how satisfied hes going to be, and hes smiling just thinking about it
then we learn about the ritual and theres this sudden spark in him, hes convinced that its the answer to his problems, he gets tunnel vision on the ritual, and if you romance him he also thinks its the only way he can assure not only his own safety, but also yours.
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and when you finally win the fight, you have to save him from himself. hes desperate, completely blinded by the power he could potentially have. if he has this power, hes never going to be vulnerable, no one will abuse him ever again.
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he is willing to lose himself to make sure he never gets hurt like this. even with high approval, if you dont succeed a persuasion roll or refuse to help him, he either turns against you or leaves your party. in his eyes, at this moment, you are the one who turned against him.
if you suceed the persuasion roll, he agrees that he can be better than cazador, and before stabbing him repeatedly, mentions (again) how hes going to enjoy this
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only to break down right after. even though its something hes been wanting to do for centuries, all the suffering hes been through came crumbling down after it was done. cazador is dead, hes the one who killed him, he finally got his revenge, and yet he feels this emptiness.
its done, why do i not feel better?
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if you saved him, he talks to you later and admits how he wasn't himself, how thankful he is that you helped him out and most of all, you believed in him. you saved him by believing he could be more than what he saw in himself.
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if you talk to him after completing dame aylin's quest in act 3 (after killing cazador), he mentions how he expected her to rejoice after defeating yet another person who intended to enslave her, but shes just tired. hes comparing her reaction to his own experience after freeing himself from his abuser
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and after karlach's reaction to killing gortash, he brings up the fact that theres "no justice in this world". contrary to what he believed earlier in the game, its not only him thats been wronged for several years. even though in the end they all got to get rid of the people who ruined their lives, they are still hurting.
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hes realising that killing your abuser, although it seemed like the simple, satisying solution of finally having your revenge from years of trauma, might free you, but it will not fix you. they're dead, but you still have to live with what they've done to you.
he is my roman empire
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n0ct0urn1quet · 2 years
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pov talking shit abt my sister in vc when my door is ever so slightly open and she probably heard me so now im all embarrassed to go out into the living room out of fear that she'll be like "so what were u talking about in there"
#i want to move out so bad !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hate it here#peppr i kno ur gonna b online in 2 seconds i am having thoughts and i WILL make a gaypos in a second im just ohgh. OUghhg!#thers a lot of things i did not say in the vc but only because if i said too much my sister 100% woulda came i n n said something but'#anyways i just . oh i am so frustrated. its not kyle he isnt doing anything its just theres people in my House at all Times Now#and after living on our own for over a year my mom n i were used to it just being me n her and me being home alone all the time#but now theres people here and its genuinely fuicking with my mental state!!!!!!!!!!!!!! so much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#its stressful. its just very very stressful#genuinely i kind of want to come n visit u just for a chance to get out of the hosue i Never Leave The House Anymore Ever#but like kitty seems to be doing . better. kitten's still a bitch n he hisses at kitty a lot but kitty seems to be doing alrite which#makes me feel moer comfy about coming to potentially see u sometime but idk it all depends on my mom and....#its. expensive! we may not be able to rly afford it honestly. but my moms making plans t go visit my brother like This Week so idk#maybe something could work out . but idk man#my mom has been moody late ly bc of rob and also because of russ (shes talking to him aain. i dont know why but i can tell that he#has a completely negative affect on her so idk why she's still trying to fucking make things work out. bc its not gonna fucking work out)#but its just . yeah. moms in a bad mood all the time and i dont think shes' gotten more than like3 hours of sleep a night so. great!#thank you robynne for making us go practically fucking broke i hope you move out soon but i fully expect you to be here til next summer.#fucking grow up lmao#anyways! sure hope she doesnt see this but if she does like the last vent i made about her on my other tumblr a few years back : sorry !#anyways im gonna gaypos now <3 i prommy im in a good mood rn i am just . oh she is just frustrating i want to move out SO bad
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jacaerysgf · 3 months
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Forgettable date
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r.q: Can I request a sweet smut modern aemond x fem reader where they were both so busy that they forgot about valentines day so aemond surprises reader with a romantic dinner and they end up just skipping dinner for some steamy bedroom time and in the middle of it, aemond whispers to reader "you're mine" and that was his way of proposing to reader, thank youu
w.c: 1.1k
c.w: office worker!reader, fluff, sweet aemond, aemonds job is left ambiguous, smut, oral (f!receiving), p in v, not proofread.
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You were so swamped with work you had no concept of time, you were sure it was february as you had to pay your rent on the first of every month but if someone asked you what day it was you would have no clue. Same goes for your boyfriend of three years aemond, despite the fact the two of you dont work in the same field your schedules just so happen to both be so packed all the time.
as the rest of your coworkers began to pack up their stuff for the day you sat at your desk still fiverously typing away at your computer, you had a presentation in a couple days and report due tomorrow afternoon so you had decided to stay overtime.
some of your coworkers had come over to talk to you as they were wrapping up for today.
“you got any plans after work?”
“no.”
one of them gasps, “what do you mean? he didnt plan anything?”
you furrow your brows but dont turn to look at them, “what do you mean? he?”
“your boyfriend? or did you guys break up or something?” you turn to her at the mention of him and tilt your head, “why would he have planned something?”
one of them laughs while the one your looking at shakes her head and sighs, “do you really not know? its valentines day.”
“no…” you turn towards your computer, looking at the date and gasping, “oh my god. i had no idea.”
“did you guys not talk this morning?”
“we did but neither of us mentioned anything.”
“maybe hes planning on surprising you later.”
you groan and run your hands along your face. what if he was and you had nothing prepared? shit you didnt even have a gift for him.
your coworkers laugh and wish you good luck before they leave.
you have an internal debate before deciding to pull out your phone to text him.
‘aemond oh my god happy valentines day it completely slipped my mind im so sorry.’
you anxiously bite your nails as you wait for him to respond. youre tempted to lock your phone shut as you notice the three bubbles pop up.
‘oh is it valentines day? i had no idea. im so sorry baby ive been swamped with work happy valentines day my love. im about to get off for the day, ill see you once you get home. love you ❤️’
you let out a sigh of relief at him admitting that he had no clue either. most people would assume that he was just saying that to make you feel better but you knew aemond wasnt like that and he wouldn't hold it against you.
‘i cant wait to see you my love. im going to be staying for a bit longer to wrap up.’
You notice he reads the next then decide that you’ll pick up some baked goods on the way home as a gift and hope that you dont stay too long as you turn off your phone and get back to work.
an hour and a half later with a box of a variety of backed goods in hand turning the key to your shared apartment with aemond. youre immediately hit with the smell of your favor meal and a smile graces your face. he knows you love it when he cooks.
“im in the dining room my love.”
you walk in and you gasp at the sight of the set up table set with flowers and candles with your favorite meal plated out.
you feel hands wrap around your waist from behind you and a kiss placed on your cheek.
“aemond..”
“happy valentines day my love.”
he lets go and take the bag out of you hands, “you picked this up?”
“on my way home. grabbed your favorite.”
he hums and walks back over to you after he places the bag on the table.
he grabs your cheeks and gives you, “how was work?” he mumbles as he continues to kiss you, “it was good, report done,” you pause for a moment as he begins to kiss down your jaw and sigh, “presentation almost done.”
he begins to trail kisses down your neck, stopping to suck on it.
“you?”
he hums, “fine.”
hes not much of a talker, especially not when hes busy leaving hickeys over your next.
“aemond the food.”
“fuck the food. i have a meal right in front of me.”
you squeal as he lifts you up bridal style and carries you upstairs to you bedroom. “youre so ridiculous aemond.”
you yelp when he tosses you on the bed and makes his way on top of you, kissing you deeply.
he pulls away from you grabs his shirt from the back of his neck and rips it off before he goes back to kissing you.
you moan against his lips and he pulls away from you hand moving down to your waist to take off your pants, your underwear sliding along with them.
“aemond.” you whine as he begins to kiss down your stomach.
“let me take care of you tonight.”
he licks a strip up your slit and uses his hands to grip your waist and presses you down as he continues to lick at you. your heads reach down and grip at his hair pressing him closer. you can feel him laugh against you which leads you to moan out loud, “aemond.”
“let me take care of you.” he repeats and wraps his lips around your clit sucking on it leading you to throw your head back onto your pillow.
he doesn't let up even when he can tell youre close and youre begging him to slow down he keeps up his pace until hes finished licking up every drop of your cum after you had finished and kisses his way back up and smiles at you.
“happy?”
“ill be happy after you fuck me.”
“you're never sated my love.”
in a rush you both take off the rest of your clothes and he reaches over to grab a condom out your bedside table before you reach out and grab his wrist.
he looks over at you with a confused look, “if you dont want continue.”
“thats not it i just,, maybe we dont need it tonight.”
hes face turns smug as he grabs the hand you had wrapped around his wrist to kiss it.
“i love you.”
“i love you to-” youre interrupted by him pushing into you and you moan gripping onto his shoulders and bringing yourself into the crook of his neck.
“fuck you always feel so good my love.”
you cant respond as he begins to thrust into you. his hands lock with yours and his lips are right against your ear.
“youre mine.”
you moan, “say it.”
“im yours aemond im yours.”
you dont notice as he reaches over into the bedside table and grabs a tiny black box.
“then marry me.”
you feel like you're in a daze as he continues to thrust and shows you a stunning ring inside the box.
“what?”
“marry me.”
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actualbird · 10 months
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who in the nxx yells “THERE’S A BUG” and who removes the bug, and how?
HELP HAHAHAKHVFAHSF THIS IS A LOVELY PROMPT, THANK U FOR THIS!!!
those who yell "THERES A BUG": marius and mc
now im not saying both of them are particularly squeamish, no no, they can definitely keep it cool when the situation Calls For It. that being said, seeing a bug in the nxx meeting room on a slow day isnt exactly the most high stakes of situations, so the most High Stakes Element remains to be whatever bug they see
mc just doesnt like bugs, theyre creepy theyre crawly and she doesnt trust anything that can dart out of her line of vision in the blink of an eye
marius also doesnt like bugs and because of his upbringing, he did not get to see very many of them growing up. which means every time he Did see a Bug Intruder, it's like a Category 5 Drama Moment
the moment they see the bug, theyre announcing it LOUDLY to everybody else in the room while also getting up to stand on some chairs
those who dont yell "THERES A BUG" but does look at the bug and track its every movement while sitting still like a statue hoping the bug doesnt notice him, as if bugs operate on some kind of t-rex knowledge: artem
let's rewind a bit. before marius and mc saw the bug, artem saw it first. and he just
didnt say anything about it
artem.....Also Does Not Like Bugs. but he also also doesnt like being loud about things he doesnt like so he just Sits There, so still you'd think he fucking died, and he hopes the bug mistakes him for some kind of inanimate man-shaped furniture and avoids him due to sheer disinterest
it doesnt avoid him.
it probably crawls or flies very close to him a few times the only thing that stops him from screaming "THERES A BUG" is his self-control thats as hard as cast-iron skillet
it's fine though because marius and mc spot it and sound the alarm
(thank god)
those who remove the bug: luke and vyn
luke and vyn are the ones who will both 1) be completely unbothered by the bug and 2) have to bring it out
the reason for luke is obvious, he's had wilderness survival training and probably had to eat bugs like in an episode of Man VS Wild to survive on an uninhabited island, so hes REALLY past any squeamishness with bugs. in fact, if mc said the word, luke would grab the bug and crush it with his bare hands
and vyn is a gardener!!! bugs are APLENTY in the garden, so he sees them not as malevolent but as important creatures in a healthy ecosystem. the bug probably got in from vyn's garden, actually, since nxx hq is on his property
and thus
The Timeline Of Events When a Bug Appears In The NXX HQ Meeting Room
bug: //crawls in
artem: //sees it, soul leaves his body for a bit and he petrifies himself as a defense mechanism
mc: why did artem go so still
marius: i dont know, maybe hes rebooting?
mc: dont be mean!
marius: im not being mea---FUCK
mc: what?
marius: THERES A BUG
mc: theres a wha---THERES A BUG
marius and mc: //immediately moving to stand on the couch
artem: //still Not Moving, hoping that mc and marius' sudden movements attract it
bug: //flexes wings open and closed
mc: NNNNO NO NO NO
marius: STOP DOING THAT MOTHERFUCKER
mc: NONONNONONONNNONONNOONONOONOO
marius: AAAAAAAAAA
vyn and luke, coming back in from where they were in the file room: ???
mc: THERES A BUG THERES A BUG
luke: oh. do you want me to kill it?
mc: NO!!
marius: YES!!!!!!
artem: i havent moved in 20 minutes
mc: JUST BRING IT OUT
luke: dead or alive?
mc: ALIVE
marius: DEAD
vyn, while they were all conversing: //gently coaxes the bug onto his palm and lets it out through the window
vyn's rationale here was that luke was doing a great job at handling (i.e. distracting) the People, so he went ahead and took care of the Bug. the bug will not be returning to the nxx meeting room because it was quite cold with no soil and also VERY loud
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coolprettyleo · 3 months
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know its for the better - begin again au ☆
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wc: 1.8k
tw: drinking. angst. family angst. kinda fluff. slut shaming. I think I got them all
ryan leonard x hughes sister au
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
ryan and frankie walked down one of the busiest streets in boston; frankie hoping to find inspiration and ryan trying the make sure she doesn't kill her self doing so.
he couldn't understand why she was so reckless with her life? she was very loved and important to so many people. i mean he knew he loved her when he first met her. why couldn't she see how amazing she was?
"I have my fake with me, plus the bouncer adores me so i think i can so get you in" she says acting annoyed but secretly happy. even though she wanted to act like ryan coming along with her was a drag, it wasn't. she liked having him here. it made her feel seen.
"frankie, i still dont think this is the way to solve things" he says to her as they get in line to go into frankies favorite bar.
"not everything has to be solved it just has to be dealt with, and this is how im dealing with it" she said with an eye roll.
ryan opened his mouth to say something but stopped when her phone when off. he sees her screen light up with a Group FaceTime call; her brothers. but to his surprise she declines?
"spam call" she waves him off after she sees ryan eye her skeptically.
"you didn't tell them yet?" he said after a moment.
ryan knew her too well.
"nope" she says popping the 'p'. "and I dont plan on it anytime soon" she adds.
"so you just plan to lie to them for the rest of your life?"
"its not lying, its avoiding. I dont lie" she said not looking at him.
"I think you’re scared to tell them because you know once you tell them. It’ll be real" he says looking at her with a challenging look.
"ryan. this is real life right now, your not dreaming" she says sarcastically, wiggling her fingers in his face.
she was so cute. even if she was being a pain in the ass.
they got to the front of the line, where the bouncer was and frankie was quick to whisper something into the bouncers ear. the bouncer eyes running up and down ryan, before ultimately deciding to lift the rope and letting them through.
"I dont think I want to know what you told him" he said to her as she pulled him by his shirt collar. something that he found to drive him crazy.
"dont be dirty, I just told him you were my gay friend. so dont get with any girls tonight please. he'll know im lying"
your the only girl I want.
"im here to watch you, not to get with girls and party" he says seriously as she orders them drinks.
"no. if im going to let you follow me around like a puppy tonight your going to party with me mr. leonard." she says handing him the drink throwing him these eyes. eyes that have gotten her everything she's ever wanted. those eyes. eyes that made ryan want to complete every wish she's ever wished.
"if I take this shot with you, you have to listen to me, tonight. I know you like to run away. so dont"
"okay! yay!" she says as she pinky promises him.
__
frankies hallway filled with giggles as ryan said another dad joke. she kept her promise and didn’t run away. it was one a.m. and it had honestly been the earliest she came back from a night out. and to her surprise she was only tipsy. ryan had actually kept her good company all night.
"did you hear the rumor about butter" he says while leaning against the wall as she looks for her keys in her purse.
"ryan shutup please" she said laughing.
"okay. I wouldn't want to spread it anyways!"
"oh god" she said as she looked at him with so much adoration. she didn’t realize how much she needed someone to care and to show they cared. the way ryan did.
“thank you ryan” she said seriously. and a thought couldn’t help but bloom over her mood as she realized what was most likely going to happen.
“anytime pretty” he said as starred into the eyes that make him want to do flips off rooftops.
“I know drew is your teammate and everything, but like please dont be a stranger”
“im sorry?” ryan was confused to what she was trying to say.
is she drunk?
“like im saying since i won’t be around as much anymore and you guys are probably going to wanna be respectful to drew and stuff, just dont be a stranger. so please if you, will, and gabe ever see me just dont be afraid to talk to me. i’ll always be nice.”
ryan couldn’t belive his ears. she thought they were all just going to stop talking to her?
“franks. just because my teammate is an asshole doesn’t mean we dont care about you. you are a person who is easy to love and unbelievably smart. and im sorry drew couldn’t see that. you dont deserve that at all” he said looking into her eyes as Frankie’s eyes couldn’t help but water.
this was the nicest thing a guy has ever told her.
“you really think so” she whispered just realizing how close they were standing next to one another. he smelt like what frankie would call a comfort smell. and as she looked at him she just wanted to trace every one of his freckles while he told her everything that’s ever happened to him.
“I do” he said. luckily for ryan. this wouldn’t be the only time in years to come he would say this to frankie. they both leaned in as frankie stood on her tiptoes and kissed him. a kiss that made her stomach do flips. a kiss that made his stomach do flips.
ryan couldn’t help but wrap his arms around her waist as she wrapped her arms around her shoulders and bring him closer. the kiss felt like they’ve searched for one another their whole lives. it felt right. time stood still.
ryan pulled away first as he realized they were both tipsy and she was probably more tipsy then him. the insecurity of she was going to act like nothing happened tomorrow creeped up on him.
“what’s wrong” she said with a hand on his cheek. her heart dropping when he pulled away.
“im sorry, i shouldn’t. we shouldn’t. we’ll talk tomorrow, go inside frankie” he said stepping away from her.
“did I do something?” she said feeling her heart drop.
“no- its just- i don’t want you to wake up tmrw and regret this, i want it to actually mean something and I dont want to be just another guy to add to your roster” he says not knowing that made frankie feel like shit.
I mean she knows herself she's the type of person to have a good time. but the fact he just thought she was going to play him? is that what drew thought when she was getting with him.
maybe thats the reason he never opened up to me
“dont worry your far from it now ryan!. have a good life” she said opening her door.
“frankie i didn’t mean it like that-“
he couldn’t even explain himself because the door had already slammed in his face.
frankie didn’t know why ryan saying that hurt her so much but it did. he basically just called her a whore in her mind and she wanted to run into her room and scream into pillow. but of course her life never went her way.
standing inside were two out of her three brothers looking like they wanted to strangle her.
“where the hell have you been” luke yelled. as jack got off the phone with whoever he was talking to. mumbling something about how frankie just walked in.
frankie was actually speechless. she never thought her brothers would make the trip to boston to see why the hell she was ignoring them.
“out of all the irresponsible things you’ve done in your life , this has to be the worst. mom was so close to calling the cops. she’s on her way with dad. we thought you were dead!” jack scolds her as she takes off her coat.
"thats a little dramatic"
"no! it isn't. we gave you space but then imagine our surprise when your coach calls and says you quit!" luke counters back. "if your having a manic episode or whatever they call it, tell us. we'll help you" Luke adds in a gentler tone.
frankie wanted to do nothing but run away as she just starred at them. the fear she had been running away since she quit was standing in her living room and they were standing their angry.
"does mom and dad know" she said after a long silence.
"yes. we all have. we've been waiting for you to own up to it and tell us though" jack answered.
"is everyone mad at me" she said as her eyes filled up with tears.
"im mad that you've had us worried sick. I mean I had to resort to asking rutger and gavin to ask their world jrs teammates if they've seen my own sister" Luke said with a scolding look. one that looked scarily similar to her mothers.
"dont listen to him, I dont know why you were s scared to just tell us. its not going to change anything between us" jack said as he walked over to his little sister and gave her a hug.
frankie didn't like hugs. she felt so awkward with them but in that moment she wanted nothing but to sob into her older brothers arms like she once did when the other girls at school were making fun of her because she played hockey and didn't do dance or cheer like the rest of them. she needed her family.
"cmon Luke" she said opening her arm out to her brother who stood of to the side. Luke accepting because he could never stay mad at his little sister.
"just dont ever do this again. if you want attention go find yourself a lover or something" Luke said laughing as they pulled away.
"hey! none of that" jack said not thinking anyone was ever going to be good enough for his sister.
"dont worry jack, I need a break from boys" she said with a sigh as she remembered what happened with ryan about ten minutes ago.
"dont talk to us about your boy problems thats why you have Quinn" jack said gagging.
"quinn also wants you to call him" jack said as he started walking to her guest bedroom.
"you good?" Luke said as he started settling into her couch and noticed her sister looked as if her mind was far else where.
how do I tell him I ruined my reputation. everyone thinks im a slut.
"I dont know"
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fipindustries · 19 days
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bojack horse bad again
you know, i was thinking back to this show again, i watched three seasons of it and that was all that i could tomach and you know what? no.
i dont accept it
i dont care, it was a bad show, it was an objectively bad show and i dont accept that everyone else decided that it was good, i dont care, it was a bad show and im going to tell you why.
emotional terrorism
maybe im a simpleton but i am someone who cares quite a lot about catharsis in my stories. this show refused to grant that, adamantly and violently. im not saying i need a happy ending, i am more than capable of enjoying bittersweet or even tragic stories, but i need a sense of completeness, some satisfaction, some release, some sense that things matter or meant something. this show insisted on refusing to give that. all this show was interested in was get an emotional reaction out of you. it was the emotional equivalent of a jump scare. it was convinced that if it made you feel bad enough people would confuse that with beeing powerful and deep. you could get the same reaction by walking up to someone on the street and kicking them in the nuts. and it would take about as much subtlety or artistry.
2. writer led rather than animator led
you could tell this was one of those shows that were made on the writer's room, not by storyboarders or artists, by "comedians". by people with english degrees. so many scenes of characters just standing around and talking. so many "jokes" that were clearly meant to be funny as something you read on a piece of paper or on a tweet and chuckle as you read it but as animation it just gave limp, stagnant scenes. so much dialog that were references and quips and puns and fast witticisms of the type you come up in the shower when thinking of clever comebacks.
there were so many fucking scenes where everything would stop and a character would launch on some stupid profound monologue about life and philosophy and psychology and relationships. it was like the writers were trying on for size paragraphs of their future memoirs or self help books. so much dialog that was begging for an award for writing. so many "mic drop" moments that were designed to be quoted. i find that the best writing is not the one that you can just quote out of context as a cool pithy phrase. a lot of the best writing ive seen in my life is meaningless when devoid of context, is inextricable of the scene and indeed of the entire story surrounding it but in here i can almost see the seams where the writers look at the camera waiting to see if you are impressed
3. inconsistent tone
this show wanted to eat its cake and then still have it. there are stories that manage to deftly weave in and out of comedic moments into serious moments. everything everywhere all at once does an amazing job jumping from the stupidest, most childish jokes into the most profound commentary about human nature, sometimes doing both at the same time and it worked, one didint cheapen the other.
in here though, it wanted to both have a completly absurd world with the stupidest characters ever and then somehow make us care for it all as if the show hadnt shot itself in the foot. it wanted us to see caroline being in love with what is clearly three children in a trenchcoat and then take her seriously as an adult, to treat any forther relationship drama she has as if it werent completly farcical.
4. ugly animation
it continued the blight that is take over adult animation by doing that disgusting repugnant paper puppet rigged interpolated quasi flash animation that only gives you stiff poses and movements and incredibly boring shots of characters standing in 3/4 perspective in front of the camera. it dull and flat and clunky and ugly, and the character designs were ugly. the noses were ugly and the mouths were ugly and the hairs were ugly and the eyes were ugly. it was all ugly. the backgrounds were fucking ugly and the colors were ugly and it was an ugly show to look at. unbearably so. and even the obligatory "weird" stylized scenes put in to shake things off and try to pretend that it was visually interesting (for like one scene per season) were also fucking ugly.
5. it had not interesting point to make
all it could do was insist and belavor and extemporize about how this one guy sucks and also most people kind of suck but specifically this one guy really sucks and he is not going to get better, or maybe he will? eh maybe, but not really, because he sucks. and we are going to make you like him because we are the writers and we are going to make him relatable and charismatic and sympathetic but actually no he sucks, you fell for it! and what does it say about you that you almost kind of liked him eh????. season after season of him, and in case you almost found anything redeemable about him, we are going to make him even worse, painfully unsubtly so, we are going to make him look at the camera and say that he sucks, because that is the level of nuance we think you can handle, dear viewer. this is called "self aware writing" and its postmodern and meta, which means its clever.
i fucking hate this show and the more i think about it the angrier it makes me, and what makes me more angriest of all is that people like it. its popular. it won awards i think. its largely recognized as a good show and its not! it sucks and its bad and if you like it you are stupid.
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destructive-path · 5 months
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Patrol Partner Protection Syndrome - E.W.
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summary: Ellies habit of going above and beyond her duties as a patrol partner causes you to question her motives.
tags: patrol partner!ellie, slight innocent! reader, ellie is older than you in this, swearing, a kiss is shared at the end, no smut in this one folks just good ol fashion yearning :)
a/n: as usual i wrote this very spur of the moment and its not proofread but you love me anyways so j shut up and enjoy
“Yep, that sounds like a classic case of the 3PS.”
“3PS? That sounds like a fucking star wars character.”
A loud laugh leaves Jesses lips at your remark furthering your frustration visibly before Dina smacks him on the shoulder gently.
“Patrol partner protection syndrome.” Dina says plainly.
“What the hell is that?”
“Its why Ellie threatened that guy that was flirting with you at the bison last night.”
The look on your face is still riddled with confusion. Dina sighs deeply, your innocence was always something that was a little difficult for others to adjust to. Explaining certain topics always took a little longer when it came to you.
“Sometimes, when two people get paired up on patrol they begin to…how should I say this? Okay look. Usually in a pair theres one person who feels a strong obligation to protect the other. It doesnt always have to be the stronger person per say. On patrol you and this one person go through some serious shit together. You both become more and more venerable the more you put your trust in them and let them protect you, aaand sometimes the lines blur between them protecting you to keep you alive and them protecting you because they think they are meant to. All the time.”
You slowly begin to understand.
“Its what happened with me and Jesse…Tommy and Maria too.”
“Wait but you’re all couples.”
Jesse and Dina look at each other then look at you. A grin fights its way on both their faces, then your eyes grow wide.
“Oh my god….OH? MY GOD? Are you saying Ellie likes me?”
They both burst out into laughter, once again making you feel extremely embarrassed. You cross your arms in frustration and slump further in your chair.
“Hey. Hey hey. Im not saying she HAS a crush on you, because thats not my place to assume how she feels completely.”
“Buut she did mention her heart beats faster anytime you smile at her, and thats like pretty gay.”
“JESSE.”
Jesse throws his hands up in defense, then shoots you a sympathetic look.
“Sorry! Look am I wrong? You two would be great together. Plus i’m sick of hearing about you every time Ellie comes over.”
“JESSE!”
“What? WHAT?”
“Your killing them.”
You felt exhausted. Ellie had feelings for you? She consoled in her best friends about your smile? This changes everything. How were you supposed to see her casually or for patrol, knowing what you knew now.
“Jesus im losing it.”
“Well, do you feel anything for Ellie?”
You thought about it for a moment.
“I-I dont know. I mean I like having her around. She always makes me feel comfortable…safe. I really like when she cooks for me or plays me songs on her guitar. She always looks so cool when she plays, and her voice is sooo pretty. I mean shes also really pretty too. Well not pretty…more like-“
As you search for the right word to describe Ellie you notice the way the couple looks at you. Like you just said something incredibly obvious and extremely oblivious to you. Then it sinks in.
“Oh my god I like Ellie.”
They both nod in unison.
“I gotta go.” You shoot up and grab your bag then rush out Dina and Jesses place, not bothering to say your goodbyes. You only had one thing in mind.
Ellie.
As you run as fast as your legs can muster, you think about the events of last night that led you to Dinas and Jesses inquiring them for advice.
It was all very trivial and cliche. You had been dancing at the Tipsy Bison after a few shots of whiskey, on your own. The usual gang was there minding their own except for Ellie. She always had her eyes on you whenever your presence was near. Glass in hand as she leaned on the bar watching while you spun around the room. Ellie couldn’t bring herself to join you, so she settled for being an audience member. She always admired your outgoing nature, never concerned on what others think of you. As Ellie thought about other attributes you had that made her fall for you, someone else had decided to take it upon them to impede on your dance party of one.
Some man tall in height but skinny in stature stood uncomfortably close to you. Uncomfortable for Ellie that is. The grip had tightened on her glass so that if she clenched any harder it would break. The sight of the mans arm slithering around your waist and pulling you close had Ellie swallowing the rest of the contents of her drink and slamming the glass on the bar counter and making her way over to you both.
“Ellie-“ Dina tried to stop her due to the angry nature of the glass hitting the wood making a sound loud enough to pull the couple away from whatever they were having, but its no good.
“Save it.” Ellie snaps, then makes her way over to you. As she advances closer she can tell you weren’t one hundred percent comfortable with this random mans advances on you. She knew you were too nice, too innocent to understand that his intentions were not pure and that you didnt have the strength to push him away. But Ellie sure did.
“Thats enough of that.” Ellie says as she rips the mans arms off of you and grabs your wrists to pull you away from him.
“Woah woah who the fuck are you?”
“Im Ellie, and we are leaving.”
“I think they can make that decision for themselves huh?”
Ellie looks at you with a deep frustration. One you had never seen in those eyes before. Not even on patrol, this was something by different. If you weren’t so tipsy you could swear it was laced with a heavy amount of possession.
“Ellie.” you slur slightly.
“We are leaving. Now.” Before the man can protest you were being pulled out the door and into the cold jackson night.
The walk back to your place was silent. Ellies grip on your wrist had morphed into a waffling hand hold sometime after you exited the Tipsy Bison. The warmth of her fingers intertwined with yours made you heat up inside, blushing extremely prominently due to the alcohol running through your system.
When you had finally reached your door Ellie pulls you face to face with her. Hand still together. She uses her free hand to push some loose strands of off your face to see you better. A soft smile twitches on her lips for a moment then she finally speaks.
“Go inside and go to bed, you’re drunk.” Its not the farewell you hoped for, but it’s soft. Ellie utters the words with care in her own way. You can’t help but stare at her through lidded puppy eyes and nod slowly.
You turn to unlock the door then turn back around.
“Goodnight Ellie.” You whisper in a way that makes her heart ache.
“Goodnight.”
It’s only when she turns around to walk away does she finally let go of your hand.
“Ellie? Ellie please open up I know you’re in there.”
After knocking for what felt like forever you were finally graced with the sounds of locks being undone. You take a step back and watch the door swing open revealing a slightly disheveled looking Ellie. Still she renders you speechless for a moment her appearance making you shy, as it always has.
“What’s up?” She says genuinely concerned. You see her face soften when she realized the interruption of her personal time was you. The difference making you blush.
“I-Can I come in?”
Her eyes grow wide, you hadn’t been inside of her space yet. The vision of you and her in her room alone flashes through her brain. She steps aside and opens the door fully to make room for you to enter.
“Oh yeah of course please come in. Sorry.” She laughs shyly. You make your way into her space and can no longer hold your questions to yourself.
“Sorry its kind of a mess I wasnt really expecting any-“
“Ellie do you like me?” Its silent for a moment before Ellie speaks up.
“Of course I like you kid, you’re my patrol partner.”
“No not in that way I mean, you’re always looking out for me and making me things. Even when we aren’t on patrol! You act like my bodyguard sometimes…”
Ellie knows exactly where to is going. Your confrontation of her actions makes her smile a bit.
“I feel the need to protect you outside of patrol sometimes, sure.” Shes looking right in your eyes, observing the look on your face so she doesn’t say the wrong thing. Right now you look as if you had just been hypnotized eyes devoid of much thought.
“3PS.” You whisper, just loud enough for Ellie to hear. It’s quiet for a moment then an involuntary scoff comes from Ellie as she raises her arm to pinch the bridge of her nose.
“You’ve been talking to fucking Jesse.” She laughs and turns away from you. You watch her in awe of what you felt like Jesse and Dina had prophesied. Was it really that simple? The act of protecting someone equating to love was a thought that made your heart swell.
“Ellie…I like you. Alot. But I need to know if you like like me or if you just like me enough to protect me. Like you would protect Jesse or Dina. Because I thought I just liked you but then I started thinking about your voice-“
“My voice?” Ellie had turned back around and was still while watching this confession spill out of you. Her question driving a step closer to you, the advancement unbeknownst to you due to the rambling of your thoughts.
“Yes your voice, and the way you sing and play guitar for me and how much i like it-”
Another step.
“-and how pretty you sound when you sing-“
Step.
“-and how pretty you look, well- not pretty but-“
With this last step you had only now realized how close she had gotten. Speech dying at the lack of a word to describe Ellies appearance. You were certain there wasn’t a word so great.
“You don’t think i’m pretty?” Shes pouts, lost on your words. The praise of her leaving your lips so easily is something she would soon crave often. Your breath begins to pick up slightly at her question. The look on her face causes you to whimper slightly. A look of hurt adorns her face, exaggerated to make you feel bad for her.
“No.” You protest meekly.
“No?” Ellie shakes her head in offense.
“No! I-I mean…I think you’re very pretty Ellie.” You shakily admit. The words make you feel a wave of embarrassment in this situation. Her proximity not making this confession any easier.
“Yeah?” She questions rising her hands to push your hair out of your face as she did the night before. The feeling of her fingertip makes you lean into her touch, closing your eyes at the soft stroke of her digit on your forehead.
“Mhhm” You nod and sigh simultaneously. As your head falls due to your loss of strength at her touch, she takes your head into her hand and strokes your cheek with her thumb. This delicate action causes your eyes to open slowly meeting Ellies green ones. Everything about her exudes admiration. She cant get enough of how at her disposal you seemed to be in this moment. The sight of you had coaxed out the need to protest admitting her feelings. No longer afraid that you might deny her.
“I..like like you too.” She whispers while staring at your lips, licking her own at the sight of them. The new shine of her lips brings a heat to your cheeks, Ellie notices this and inhales deep. Her confession has you reeling. The sound of her voice as she admits her likeness towards you radiates need. For once you are certain it’s because of you. Ellie needed you. Ellie wanted you.
“Stay with me today. Hmm? Let me show you.” The softness of her request is as comforting as a pillow. You can tell she so desperately wants to rid you of any doubts that Ellie was completely and utterly infatuated with you.
“Show me what?” You ask curious of what she had in store. She licks her lips again. Then brings your face so close that you can feel Ellies breath on your lips as she whispers-
“How much I like you.”
before placing a desperate kiss on your lips.
~
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chrissturnsgirlll222 · 3 months
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second, never first
part seven | part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six
chris x fem!reader
summary - you grew up hating one guy all of high school but suddenly become close friends, but as time goes on feelings develop, only its one sided.
warnings - swearing, use of y/n, BOYS (no smut… for now lol)
word count - 700+??
NOT PROOFREAD
-
sitting next to chris during a scary movie when he is being set up with your best friend is wayy more terrifying than the conjuring let me tell you that. anna may be my best friend but i know what she i capable of and lets just say i cannot let her find out what is going on right now. for the first 30 minutes of the movie it was calm, mini jump scares here and there. each time there was a jump scare i would just jump and cover my eyes. but the movie got progressively scarier and thats how i ended up curled up next to chris with my knees up to my chest, hands over my eyes, head on his chest and his right arm on my back.
since matt and nick were sitting on a different couch i had no one else to turn to and i am a fucking pussy when it comes to scary movies. im a romance girl my favourite movies include kissing and heartfelt confessions not people in chair flipping upside down because of a demon taking over their body.
“are you sure your ok to finish this movie, we can turn it off.” chris whispers looking down at me, “uhhh” i say out loud. “its ok i can finish it.” i say looking at him as he chuckles and rubs my right shoulder.
if the situation was different i would be ecstatic to be cuddled up to chris right now but its wrong. i moved to sit up and chris removes his arm from me and grabs his water bottle off the coffee table and sips on it. the movie finally finishes and i let out the biggest sigh when its done.
“jesus y/n you look scared shitless it wasnt even that bad.” nick says. “dont think i didnt hear you audibly scream like 20 minutes ago.” i snap back. “ok” nick says sarcastically.
i grab my eyes from my purse and start my car, looking out the window to see if it actually started. “your leaving now?” chris asks. “well we have school tomorrow no?” i reply. “oh yeah” he says. “im gonna go grab a water from the fridge if thats ok.” i say “yep go ahead” chris says holding his hand out toward the hallway that leads to the kitchen. as im walking out i hear the boys mumbling.
“matt snap out of it.” i hear chris say in an annoyed tone as i walk back out to the living room. “im gonna take off now and hopefully am able to sleep tonight.” i smile. “ok thanks for coming” matt says, i smile at him and wave them off as i walk out.
-
later that night i got a text from chris
sunday 11:29pm
chris: be prepared for anna tomorrow
y/n: what are you talking about?????
chris: she completely blew up on me when i told her we had a movie night
y/n: did you tell her that your brothers were also included..
chris: yep
chris: she is still pissed
y/n: ok so i guess i will just go fuck myself
ring ring ring
i answer the face time with chris.
“chris what the fuck do you mean shes pissed, like jealous?” i exclaim. i knew this would fucking happen, anna is going to think me and chris are crossing her. “like i mean she thinks were hooking up and im using a movie night with my siblings to cover that up.” he states. “your fucking joking.” i say, “why the fuck doesnt she believe you i mean you guys are practically dating kissing every weekend and she thinks i want you because i set you two up?” i breathe. “ok kid calm down, she just needs reassurance from both of us.” he says shifting in his position on his bed. “you like her why would she believe you would want me in the first place.” i say.
“i dont know kid you tell me.”
-
thanks for reading xx
taglist: @sleepysturnss @blahbel668 @alorsxsturn @w4nnabeurs @junnniiieee07 @waydasims @accio326 @bitchydragonparadise @matthewsturnioloswifey
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zedleaked · 4 months
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[APPARENTLY PEOPLE HERE WANTED TO KNOW THE HUMAN AXIS LORE SO IM JUST GOING TO COPY MY TWITTER POST HERE…] BASIC GIST IS THAT THIS IS JUST A GENERAL HUMAN AU. MONSTERS AND HUMANS SWAPPED. WOWIE!
ANYWAYS READ MORE FOR AXIS
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AXIS ORIGIN IS STILL A BIT FUZZY. HERE HE'S LIKE CHUJIN'S ADOPTED SON [GENDER NEUTRAL],, CATGIRLTRICKSTER ON TWITTER SUGGESTED CHUJIN JUST FINDING YOUNG AXIS IN A PIPE OR SOMETHING AND I THINK THATS REALLY FUNNY... THOUGH HIS ORIGINS WOULD BE VAGUE. IF ASKED HE'D SAY HE DOESN'T REMEMBER.
ALSO NOTE BEFORE I FORGET. AXIS WAS JUST BORN WITH ONE LEG. THERE IS NO LORE REASON TO WHY ITS MISSING, IT IS JUST THE WAY HE IS. CHUJIN MAKES HIM A ROBOTIC LEG SO HE CAN HAVE AN EASIER TIME.
SURE I COULD GIVE A FUCKED REASON AS TO WHY HE DOESNT HAVE IT BUT I DONT FEEL LIKE IT.
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AXIS WOULD BE AN APPRENTICE UNDER CHUJIN SIMILAR TO MARTLET [I NEEDA DRAW MARTLET EVENTUALLY] PLUS IN GAME THERE'S FLAVOR TEXT ABOUT HIM FLIPPING THROUGH THE ROYAL GUARD HANDBOOK IN HIS MIND. HONESTLY. MARTLET AND AXIS BEING FRIENDS THROUGH SHARING THE SAME INTEREST IS SILLY...
HE'D WANT TO TRAIN HIMSELF TO BECOME A ROYAL GUARD OR AT LEAST A PROTECTOR TO PAYBACK CHUJIN FOR TAKING HIM IN. HE'S GOING TO PROTECT HIS FATHER AND HUMANKIND. IT'S HIS BIGGEST GOAL IN LIFE.
STEAMWORKS STILL EXISTS. ITS JUST CHUJIN HADNT BUILT THE AXIS MODELS IN THIS AU BECAUSE. YOU KNOW.
MAYBE HE SAW POTENTIAL IN HUMAN AXIS, SEEING HOW DETERMINED HE IS TO GROW STRONGER AND PROTECT PEOPLE. CHUJIN WOULD WANT HIM TO HONE HIS SKILLS TO BECOME SOMETHING... BIG.
IN A WAY. AXIS WAS A PEEK INTO WHAT HUMANS COULD BECOME AND WHAT THAT COULD DO FOR HUMAN SOCIETY UNDERGROUND.
MEANWHILE AXIS IS ENAMORED BY STEAMWORKS AND JUST CHUJIN'S WORK IN GENERAL. HE REALLY ADMIRES ROBOTS, HE THINKS ABOUT WHAT ITS LIKE IF HE HAD ROBOTIC MODIFICATIONS.
AND LESS LORE RELEVANT BUT HE ALSO HAS CONNECTIONS TO KANAKO TOO! THEY ARE THE SIBLINGS EVER. THOUGH IVE BEEN WONDERING HOW CEROBA NOT KNOWING AXIS IN STEAMWORKS WOULD WORK. IT'D BE KINDA WEIRD FOR CHUJIN TO KEEP A WHOLE ASS CHILD SECRET FROM HER.
THEYVE PROBABLY SEEN EACH OTHER AND NEVER HAD MUCH SIGNIFICANT
INTERACTIONS FOR THEM TO FULLY REMEMBER EACH OTHER. AXIS SPENDS A MAJORITY OF HIS TIME AT STEAMWORKS OR DOING ROYAL GUARD SHIT, AND WHEN HES NOT DOING THAT HES PROBABLY PLAYING WITH KANAKO [WHEN CEROBA ISNT AROUND]
AND WELL. WE HAD TO GET TO THIS PART EVENTUALLY. ONE DAY A MONSTER MAKES ITS WAY INTO THE UNDERGROUND AND STARTED KILLING PEOPLE. DALV [WHO I ALSO NEED TO DRAW] GOT CAUGHT UP IN THE FRAY WHILE PLAYING WITH KANAKO [AND AXIS TOO]. UPON SEEING HIS FRIENDS GET HURT. SOMETHING CLICKS.
AXIS HAD TRAINED UP TO THIS POINT. THIS WAS HIS MOMENT. HE HAD TO SAVE THE PEOPLE FROM THE THREAT IN FRONT OF THEM. INSTINCTS KICK IN AND HE GOES IN TO FIGHT THE MONSTER WHILE DALV TAKES KANAKO TO SAFETY.
THIS MONSTER WAS TOUGH. HE WAS ALMOST KILLED. BUT HE HAD TO PERSEVERE.
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SOMETHING JUST ACTIVATED IN HIS SOUL.
HE FELT A SURGE OF POWER. THE ONLY THING HE KNEW IN THAT MOMENT WAS TO.
GET. RID. OF. THE. THREAT.
IN FRONT OF HIM WAS JUST. A HEADLESS BODY THAT SLOWLY FADED INTO DUST.
THAT... HE DIDNT MEAN TO GO THAT FAR.
SIMILAR TO CLOVER IN GENOCIDE, AXIS HAD RAPIDLY LEVELED UP AND SHOT A POWERFUL ATTACK AT THE MONSTER IN RESPONSE TO ALMOST DYING. HE NEEDED TO KEEP GOING NO MATTER WHAT.
STILL. THE CONSEQUENCES OF HIS ACTIONS LAID HEAVY ON HIM.
HE HAD KILLED A LIVING, BREATHING THING.
SOON AFTER CHUJIN WALKED IN ON THE SCENE COMPLETELY HORRIFIED. AXIS, ASHAMED OF WHAT HE HAD DONE RAN TOWARD STEAMWORKS TO ISOLATE HIMSELF, SIMILAR TO DALV.
SURE, HE HAD SAVED PEOPLE FROM THAT MONSTER BUT DID HE HAVE TO BE SO GRUESOME?
CHUJIN RAN AFTER HIM, TRYING TO GET HIM BACK
CHUJIN FINDS HIM AT STEAMWORKS, WALLOWING IN JUST. EVERY EMOTION.
HE TRIES TO COMFORT HIM THOUGH AXIS IS STILL INSISTENT ON NOT GOING OUT.
THE TWO REACHED THE COMPROMISE THAT: AXIS WOULD GUARD AND PROTECT STEAMWORKS AND THAT CHUJIN WOULD CHECK UP ON HIM EVERY NOW AND THEN.
SO THATS WHAT HE DID. HE STAYED AT STEAMWORKS, WATCHING OVER THE PLACE AND ITS ROBOTS FOR….. AGES.
EVENTUALLY CHUJIN'S CHECK UPS GET MORE SPARSE UNTIL JUST. NOTHING.
AXIS NOTICES TOO THAT LESS AND LESS SCIENTISTS ARE PRESENT AT STEAMWORKS. UNTIL THERE IS NO ONE THERE.
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WHEN ASKED IF HE WAS GOING TO LEAVE
TOO HE SAID
"NO. MY FATHER AND I HAD REACHED THE AGREEMENT THAT I WOULD STAY AND PATROL THIS AREA, AND THAT I WILL DO." THERE WAS NO CONVINCING HIM TO LEAVE. SO THE OTHERS RELUCTANTLY LEFT HIM BE.
DAY BY DAY HE WATCHES STEAMWORKS FLOOD AND DECAY. WHILE HE STAYS THERE TRYING TO KEEP UP THE AGREEMENT BETWEEN HIS FATHER AND HIMSELF.
NO ONE HAD TOLD HIM.
ONE DAY THOUGH HE FINDS THAT STEAMWORKS SUDDENLY ACTIVATES RIGHT BEFORE SEEING A MONSTER ONCE AGAIN.
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OH HE REMEMBERS THE PAST WELL. IN THIS AU IT WAS IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO GET HIS MEMORY ERASED.
WHILE THE EVENTS PLAY OUT MOSTLY THE SAME COMPARED TO NORMAL UTY.
AXIS SEEMS MORE HESITANT THAN USUAL. AND PROBABLY MONOLOGUING A LITTLE SIMILAR TO WHAT DALV DOES
BEING A HUMAN. HE POSES LESS OF A THREAT ON HIS OWN. HOWEVER. MY GUY SETS UP HOME ALONE TYPE TRAPS N SHIT TO TRY AND CATCH CLOVER INSTEAD [PART OF HIS ROYAL GUARD TRAINING!!.
ONLY RESORTING TO USING "ROBOTIC MODIFICATIONS" HE HAD FOUND WHEN CLOVER REALLY [ticks] HIM OFF.
AND YES. HE STILL GETS A ROBOT SPOUSE IF A PACIFIST PLAYTHROUGH HAPPENS. HUMAN AXIS IS OBJECTUM. ITS REAL.
SO YEAH THAT IS ALL THE THINGS I THINK.
HOLY SHIT THIS THREAD IS LONG. FEW PEOPLE WILL READ THIS I THINK BUT I STILL WANTED TO GET STUPID AU THOUGHTS OUT. UH. YEAH HOPE THAT IS GOOD OR SMTH.. FEEL FREE TO ASK QUESTIONS 🥺
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calypsolemon · 8 months
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okay let’s try and analyze anthy’s reactions during duels and why she sometimes is just completely still and other times she’s like “utena watch out!!” and other times she’s full on interfering. also how her relationship with utena and vice versa changes during the whole season
Lune you had no clue how much you were asking for when you sent this partway thru our watchthru lmaooo
I think the easiest question to answer here is "why she is completely still sometimes" and well it's that... most of the time she doesn't need to do anything. Anthy has been acting as the rose bride for what is clearly a looong time, and her "job" (her real job, as commanded by Akio, not what she presents to the duelists) essentially amounts to subtly manipulating people into projecting their desires onto her, so they will fight to own her. Usually, by the time they are at the arena clashing swords, Anthy has already done everything she needs to - the pawns are in place so to speak, she only needs to watch them play out their parts.
Beyond that, Anthy is generally emotionally disconnected from what goes on in the duels, despite the fact that they influence who she is going to have to live with. Though some duelists may, on a surface-level, treat Anthy better than others, and that might lead her to attempt to subtly push duels in her favor when she can, she ultimately sees her abuse at the hands of duelists as an inevitability, just another Thursday in the life of the Rose Bride. Therefore, apathy is the default Anthy emotion for any given duel.
So lets talk about the times when she is Very Much Not Apathetic
From the very first duel, she actually does express shock at Utena winning the duel with just a wooden sword. I will be honest, I dont actually put much weight onto this moment. I think its just sort of a natural reaction to someone so uninvested in either Anthy or the power she represents, winning the duel in such a dramatic way. I'm not even sure at this point she's clued in to Utena embodying Dios.
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More notably, we have Miki's duel, which is the first true sign of mid-duel intervention by Anthy. By this point Utena has had an actual moment of "Dios coming down from the castle to possess her," which... depending on your reading means either Anthy, Akio, or both see some sort of potential in Utena. So she blatantly throws the duel for Miki by directly contrasting the idea of protecting her she's purposefully built up till this point.
The most notable reaction from the first arc, though, would be in the second duel against Touga.
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This is after we get one of the only direct confirmations in this arc that Anthy is actually beginning to care for Utena; the scene where she is sitting alone, imagining Utena across from her at the table. In this moment, when Utena is fighting for her princely ideals despite the risk of actual death, Anthy is (for lack of a better term) triggered into recalling when Dios was gravely injured and still attempting to act as prince. And whether it is through the protective instincts of those memories, or just straight up being pulled out of concentration of what she's doing, it causes her to accidentally throw the duel for Touga, by rescinding her power from his sword.
So, we basically have two precedents set for Anthy reacting during duels: She sometimes consciously interferes as a strategic move, and she sometimes has a genuine emotional reaction, usually in relation to her memories of Dios being triggered and/or potential care for Utena. I don't actually think these two things are mutually exclusive, however, and they become muddled as we move into the Black Rose Arc.
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Anthy definitely begins to be a lot more lively during these duels, from interacting with the objects on the tables, to giving Utena's sword the blessing, to yelling for her as she catches her mid-air. Is this because she genuinely cares for or is concerned about Utena? Is projecting Dios onto her? Or is it just because Utena winning is what is necessary for the duels to function? Maybe some combo of all? Who knows
The most notable Black Rose Duel reaction, to me personally, is when Anthy downright demands Utena pull the sword from her against Wakaba. Its very uncharacteristic of her, and I believe its because, despite the Black Rose Duels being something she has a hand in, she may genuinely be concerned for her own life here, as she has built up Wakaba to be actually, murderously jealous of her personally, and Utena is actively refusing to fight.
As we move into the final arcs of the show, we get one of the most blatant Anthy duel disruptions to date:
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The sword of Dios disappears mid-battle, and instead of remembering Dios in the face of fighting against impossible odds, it is now Utena's words of friendship that spur her to jump in front of her, and draw her own sword from her chest. I really think this is one of the most significant mid-duel actions Anthy takes besides the final duel. It shows that Anthy's emotions are no longer being spurred on by simple relation back to Dios, but rather by the genuine care that Utena is showing her. Even if their relationship is about to be mired in turmoil thanks to Akio's interference, it was starting to become something real, and it was also starting to break down Anthy's carefully built walls.
I'm getting eepy and also this is getting long, so I'm going to stop the analysis train there. I could get into the final duel but quite frankly I think thats an essay in and of itself. Anthy's reactions during duels is really a fascinating topic and you could probably go on forever talking about it (just like everything else in this show)
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i met with a good friend yesterday and it was really nice but something is bothering me and i wish it didnt.
so she has started to call herself a „queer feminist“. she kept talking about „queer“ this and „queer“ that and at some point talked about reading a „queer“ book. thats when i interjected and said what does queer mean? this tells me nothing. is it about a trans male experience, about a lesbian woman, this doesnt mean anything (turned out to be about a bisexual woman which is why she related which she probably wouldnt have if it was about a different type of „queer“ person). so i go on saying thats why i find the term useless. she says she finds it a useful umbrella term and i say umbrella for what? she says „what if for example a woman dates a nonbinary person?“ im like well it depends if the person is male or female since sexuality is still based on sex. what do i as a bisexual woman have in common with a straight man who thinks he‘s a woman? i dont see us as part of the same group. and while she wasnt able to explain the usefulness of the term she said she would keep using it. out of principle i guess.
and it frustrates me because she like many other women is an intelligent and reflected woman whose opinion matters to me but she seems to mindlessly parrot whats popular right now which makes me take her opinion on feminism a lot less serious. how are you a feminist but you think one can identify in and out of womanhood? who are womens rights for then? people who identify as women or people who are women? at the end of the day, if you think women can stop being women under certain conditions, i just dont know how you are helping the liberation of women.
i just cant take people seriously who earnestly use nothing terms like „queer“ and „nonbinary“ and who think me an extremist for not pretending the person we both know is a woman is a „nonbinary person“. it doesnt seem like she has thought about why its predominantly women identifying as nonbinary, and what background these people have (we live in a very liberal city and shes doing her masters in a program and at a university that is breathing queer theory). its like a virus, smart women suddenly regurgitating and internalising all this seemingly without ever considering the implications and consequences. and it creates a distance between women like my friend and i who definitely share a value system but i refuse to pretend and just accept.
she doesnt even know theres many lesbian, gay, bisexual and even trans people who dont consider themselves „queer“. „queer“ is its own community and NOT an umbrella term for same sex attracted or gender dysphoric people (who are already not a coherent group). depending who you ask, asexuals and intersex people are also included. which basically makes „queer“ another term for „different“ (which is its original meaning completely lost here because we are in germany and only use queer in this context).
and since we had debates in the past i already know where it will go when we talk about it. she considers me to be extreme anyways so we will start with her wanting to reject my opinion. it will end with her saying „i cant argue with that (my arguments) but i still disagree“ because its so scary to start questioning all that while youre in these super „queer“ environments.
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