#i cant wait to eat actual food again

[c10v3r]

my coping mechanism is drawing women kissing /SILLY

[vanyelle]

Oh, Senshi in my head, what do I eat while on a liquid/soft food diet that's still nutritionally balanced?

[tianhai03]

some dante doodles that i havent put up here yet

[svnmouth]

I think getting a hysterectomy would either help with my migraine issues or just give me different problems but I wont be able to know until next year minimum and even then I dont know if I can do a second surgery so soon. the way that birth control just utterly and completely fucks you over when youre starting it, when youre on it, and when youre getting off it is so. Idk if its even worth it to change my birth control if Im gonna get a hystrectomy in the vague soonish future even if I feel like absolute dogshit for an entire month for 1/3rd of the year.

[local-magpie]

it is genuinely homophobic how often i need to put food into my body to avoid feeling Absolutely Fucking Horrendous. it's barely past 4pm, i ate lunch late, WHY do i feel like i am literally in the process of dying. i hate this

[tittysuckersworld]

yknow whats fucked up when ypu have an unidentified illness that has inconsistent triggers and has left you half bedridden for months? that no one tells you when your seemingly getting better? its that every waking moment after will be filled with anxiety. it will be filled with more questions and charts and behaviors with things acting up that make no sence and a constant dread of "what if the worst times ive had happen again? what if i somehow get really worse again and have to be home in pain mostly for another month? why cant the doctors just have given me an explanation?". anyways im normal hi :>

[mbat]

not looking forward to christmas anymore

[kyluff]

— ↺ ‘When He Eat The Cookie He Got Good Form’

✎ luffy + zoro + sanji x reader !

✦ summary ➠ one piece men eating you out blurbs

✦ warnings ➠ nsfw, cunnilingus, swearing, almost getting caught

✦ note ➠ 3000+ LIKES ON MY CLINGY GOJO POST?!? thats actually insane, I’m so happy thank you for all the support 😨🫶

✪ Monkey D. Luffy

— You felt shaking, hands were on you and vigorously pushing and pulling you. Your eyes weren’t open yet, they couldn’t, you were just sleeping a few seconds ago and now you were being rudely awaken. Keeping your eyes closed, you called out for your boyfriend.

“What, what is it Luffy?” You sighed, shoving your face further in the blanket, trying to go back to the time when you were still sound asleep. “It’s still nighttime, go back to bed.”

He whined out, nuzzling his face in your neck. “But I’m hungry.”

Of course he is, you shook your head in annoyance. “That’s what you woke me up for? Wait and eat in the morning like the rest of us.”

Luffy licked your cheek, leaving heavy and warm breaths on it. He always was so impatient when he wanted something, especially when hunger was what he wanted. “But I cant.”

You were shocked, you really shouldn’t be though, he was obsessed with food to point where it was slightly unhealthy. You forcefully shoved his face away from you, making him fall on his side of the bed. “Well too bad, now go to sleep.”

“I can’t, not when I’m so hungry.” He huffed out, sounding defeated by his own words, at least it seemed like he was done with this stunt. But you felt bad a little bit, if he was so hungry that he couldn’t even sleep, then that’s an issue.

“If you’re really that hungry go to the kitchen.” That was the final thing you were going to say, now you were for real going to sleep.

You felt him shuffling beside you and the bed swaying from his movement. It melt like he was moving down the bed, making it to the foot of it. You ignored him, just wanting this to be over.

He disappeared under to covers for a minute, lifting your leg and placing himself between them. “Why would I go to the kitchen? My foods already right here.”

For the first time that night your eyes fluttered open, taking a moment to adjust to the environment. You reached in the dark for the light, turning it on and removing the cloth that separated the two of you, bLuffy was there, resting his cheek on your thigh. He had a lazy and goofy smile on his face like he always did, but his eyes were different. His eyes stared into your soul, hunger definitely evident in his gaze.

“Oh,” That’s all you could say, you had just been waken and had to face this. “You’re that type of hungry.”

The man between your limbs nodded eagerly, relieved that you had finally understood him. He had awoken in the middle of the night and the feeling washed over him, he couldn’t sleep after that, he needed you.

“Well, eat then.” That’s all it took for him rip off your shorts and underwear, revealing you to him. You could never deny your boyfriend, even if it was so late, not when he looked so longingly up at you.

He delve in instantly, not being able to wait any longer. His mouth was wide open against your folds, sucking and nudging them how ever he wished. Luffy didn’t focus on anywhere in particular when he ate you out, he liked to pay attention to every part of you down there, making it a messy operation, your juices spread across his face and everywhere on your thighs.

“Oh-h, so good.” This session Luffy seemed to really want it, he was licking so aggressively and tugged harshly at your lips. You weren’t complaining, the pleasure was almost unbearable.

It wasn’t till he placed a bite on your clit that you felt the beginnings of your end. He’s never done this before, but the new found trick brought you dangerously close to your climax.

“Do it again!” You pleaded, wanting to feel that same sensation from before. And he listened, using his canine to squish your bud, he lapped at the same spot to soothe it. You came undone, Luffy crawled up your body and dropped onto your chest, you noticed he had a soft grin on his face.

“You really were hungry, huh?” Your fingers started playing and twirling mindlessly with his hair.

“Mhm.” He hummed, closing his eyes from the comfort he received at the mercy of your hands. You too shut your eyes, being able to sleep again.

✪ Roronoa Zoro

— If there was one thing you knew about your boyfriend, it was how much he liked eating pussy. He’d eat it from the back, he’d eat it in sixty nine, he’d eat in the shower. He would literally do it anywhere at anytime. A position he hadn’t tried though was you sitting on his face.

So right now, he decided that you were going to sit on his face, but you were having some difficulty with that. You hovered over his awaiting mouth, using the headboard of the bed to hold yourself up.

“Sit on my face already.” He wrapped his buff arms around your thighs, attempting to pull you down on his face.

“Z-Zoro, don’t you think I’ll be to heavy?” You quivered, not letting him win the tug of war you were having.

“Don’t care,” The greened haired man loosened his grip, letting you raise slightly. “Just want to taste you.”

You bit your lip, thinking about how desperate his expression looked, you could tell he really wanted this and who were you to deny? You reluctantly lowered yourself closer to his face, making sure not to have your whole weight on him.

His lips chased yours, coming up to meet your dripping core where it was above him. He slowly made out with it, messily sucking and slurping. He quickly shook his face in your heat, spreading the juices he has created.

“Fucking come here.” His words were muffled against your skin as he forced you to fully sit down on his face. Your cheeked flushed in embarrassment, worrying if you were to much for your boyfriend to bare. You tried to get off, but the strong arms on your legs kept you in place.

“Zoro!” You whimpered, grasp tightening on the wooden frame.

He only carried on, now comfortable with the position you were in, nice and snug to his face. His tongue worked quick and tight circles on your bud, not stopping until he heard a moan rip from your vocal cords.

You glanced down on him through your droopy eyes, he was also looking up at you. His eyes always stood out to you, they were always stern and fierce, staring right through you.

He kept eye contact with you as he face moved deeper into you, his nose becoming smaller in size. Your stomach did flips in response, contracting as you felt tingling down there.

He smiled into you, he could see how much you liked sitting on his face, and to think on how you were so against it before.

His grin became bigger as he noticed how close you were, this might be the quickest he’s ever made you come.

Picking up his pace, he pushed you over the edge until you came undone onto his smushed face. “How do you like the new position now?”

✪ Vinsmoke Sanji

— You were becoming very annoyed at your boyfriends current antics, he’s been at it for what it felt like hours now. You sat on a chair in the kitchen, attempting to enjoy the beautiful meal that Sanji had prepared for you. That task was almost impossible though, due to the man that was positioned at your feet in front your chair.

“For the tenth time, Sanji, the answer is no.” You huffed out, stabbing another piece of food with your fork.

“Please, Y/n! Just one taste!” He begged, smushing his blushing face against your exposed knee. You had decided to wear a skirt today as it was very warm outside, it seemed to have an affect on the blonde man.

“I’m trying to eat, can’t you wait until I’m at least finished?” You wiggled your leg, trying to shake the man attached to your knee off of you.

His grasp became harder, slowing your movements until they stopped totally. His face moved closer, it reached the hem of your skirt where he brought his fingers to fidget with it softly. “I can’t wait, need it right now.”

Normally you wouldn’t put up such a fuss, but you were in the kitchen, anyone could walk in whenever they wanted. “Sanji, what if someone came in? Like if Luffy got hungry and ran in, what then?”

“I’ll be quick, promise.” He started laying quick kisses on your thighs, his eyes still looked at you from below waiting for your response.

You thought about it for a moment, sighing in defeat. “You promise?” He nodded eagerly, eyes filled with lust as he glanced up at you. You nodded your head in agreement, once you gave him the go ahead he immediately flipped your skirt and dived straight in, head disappearing under the flowy material.

At first he kissed you through the cloth that separated him from your bare pussy, his breath was warm when it fanned onto you. He pulled your underwear off, revealing everything to him.

For some reason unknown to you as you couldn’t see Sanji because of your bottoms he paused in his tracks, not going further.

“You said you’d be fast, get on with it and eat me out already.” You gave him time to resume his prior actions but when he refused and stayed in his place, you threw the skirt up off his head. “What are yo-”

“Just admiring my pretty girl.” Anyone would assume that he was referring to you, but you knew what he was talking about and it wasn’t your face. It was your cunt.

“Shut up.” You forced his face into your core, you couldn’t look at him any longer, just thinking about his words made a wave of heat form in your lower stomach.

Your boyfriend didn’t protest, starting to lick long strips up your slit, sucking on your bud when he reached it at the end. He repeatedly did this until he felt your juices slipping everywhere, now your hole was ready for his tongue. He slipped it inside, letting it slowly slide in to its full length.

You whimpered in response, hands flying to his yellow hair. “Keep going.”

He listened to your pleads, swirling his muscle around in circles before pulling out and searching upwards for your buzzing clit. You felt his lips wrap around it, applying suction on it, during all of this the tip of his tongue poked through his lips and flicked at your bud.

“So close, Sanji!” Your legs enclosed on his torso, trapping him. His actions became faster, suction harder and flicking harsher. It was all too much for your aching cunt, your climax was nearing.

Just as you were about to let go, you heard a voice coming from outside the door. “Sanji! I’m hungry when it food going to be ready!?”

“Have some patience Luffy, you pig!” He pulled away to yell at the pirate captain, stuffing his face back in like nothing had happened.

“Sanj-ji he’s going to walk in here!” You felt tears sting your eyes at the stressful situation that had a chance to occur, but the tears were also present in your eyes due to the fact that the feeling from before was back again.

The cook didn’t respond, eating you out the same as before the interruption. You panted, pawing at his locks as you came on Sanjis mouth.

He quickly licked it all up, placing your panties back on and flattened out your skirt to normal just in time before the energetic black haired boy came barreling through the kitchen doors.

[diordeer]

౨ৎ PAPER RINGS

“i like shiny things, but i’d marry you with paper rings, you're the one i want. i hate accidents except when we went from friends to this” - taylor swift (smau)

contains: charlie bushnell x tennis player!reader, face claim is emma raducanu

description: dior and walker being my plot movers for ever, im eating all these sporty reader requests, i love it! Ugh and i have my food tech practical exam tmrw im actually terrified ive practised all my dishes but not within the time frame!

requested by: anonymous

Liked by walker.scobell, yn.ln and others

dior.n.goodjohn charlie’s so excited to see yn the match

tagged iamcharliebushnell, walker.scobell

View all comments

user1 STOP BC WHYS THAT SO CUTE

yn.ln 🫣🫣

↳ dior.n.goodjohn omg @iamcharliebushnell

↳ iamcharliebushnell dont put me on the spot like this!!

↳ walker.scobell hes obsessed with u yn

↳ yn.ln this will be my motivation not to mess up then 😋

↳ iamcharliebushnell omg

↳ dior.n.goodjohn MANS NOT EVEN TRYING TO ACT COOL AROUND HER

↳ user3 YN AND CHARLIE?!

↳ aryansimhadri apparently!!

user2 omg i’ll be there too! fingers crossed i see u guys

↳ dior.n.goodjohn all u will see is charlie smiling and blushing at yn

↳ iamcharliebushnell STOP

user4 oh to have charlie have a crush on me

user5 i cant wait to see yn omg shes gonna do SO GOOD like she BETTER win

↳ iamcharliebushnell !!

Liked by iamcharliebushnell, sydney_sweeney and others

yn.ln WHAT WHAT WHAT?! still in complete denial?!

View all comments.

user1 DENIAL? U EARNT THAT GIRL NO DENIAL IS NECESSARY!!

user2 OH MY GOD THIS WAS SO GOOD

user3 well done ur amazing!!!

iamcharliebushnell u were SO INCREDIBLE!!

↳ yn.ln awhh 🤭

↳ dior.n.goodjohn hes at it again!

↳ walker.scobell confirm or denial he was ur motivation?

↳ yn.ln will say neither, keeping my dignity

↳ walker.scobell so thats a yes

↳ user4 omgg!! her and charlie are so cute

↳ user5 i BEG they get together

user6 gal beat everyone and looked good while doing it

[liked by iamcharliebushnell]

↳ user7 LMAO CHARLIE LIKED

↳ user6 omg!!

user8 shes literally my inspiration

↳ yn.ln omg 😖 i love you

Liked by dior.n.goodjohn, walker.scobell and others

iamcharliebushnell post pizza!!

View all comments

user1 what was that 😀

dior.n.goodjohn your welcome 😘

↳ user2 this is definitely about her post at yns tennis match!!!

↳ user3 wow who would’ve guessed!!

user5 IS THIS YN OMG?!

user4 yum yum yum

↳ yn.ln indeed

↳ user4 SO IT IS U?

↳ yn.ln oopsie

user6 maybe i should start getting my friends to embarrass me in my crushes comment sections, if it works this well

user7 the hug… i cant 😖😖🫶

↳ user8 they are what i want

walker.scobell booo shes way out of ur league!!

↳ leahsavajeffries let him live ☹️

user9 why does like everyone in the percy jackson cast get pizzas all the time

↳ dior.n.goodjohn its convinient 🤷‍♀️

↳ aryansimhadri its yummy!

taglist: @lostinhisworld @lizziesfirstwife @auttumnsayshi @silkenthusiasts @taygrls @kidkrowk @kanojous @niktwazny303 @m00ng4z3r @highfidelities @b0ok-lover @vamplyle @xyzstar @urmomsgirlfriend1

[victorianbatman]

More ATLA/LOK Incorrect quotes

GN reader, unless stated otherwise

Bolin, propping his feet on the table: So, I heard you like bad boys?

Y/n: What? No.

Bolin, taking his feet off the table: Oh thank God, that felt terrible.

-

Lin: Whats this?

Y/n, hugging her: Affection.

Lin: Disgusting.

Lin:…

Lin: Do it again.

-

Bolin: Wow, your legs look amazing in those pants!

Y/n: You should see me without them.

Bolin: Without.. legs?

-

Sokka: What did you make for Y/n?

Zuko, staring at the burnt food: Regret.

-

Korra, holding kettle: Coffee or tea?

Y/n: Tea.

Korra: Wrong! Its coffee.

-

Bolin, talking about y/n: My crush isn’t picking up on any of my hints.

Mako: What hints have you given them?

Bolin: I think about them.. a lot.

Bolin: And sometimes I think about talking to them.

-

Y/n: Mako?

Mako: What?

Y/n: Are you asleep?

Mako: Who the fuck did you think said ‘what’?

-

Y/n, waking up: Am I dead?

[Sees Asami next to them]

Y/n: Is this heaven?

Korra, bangs on door: Open up, fuckers its me Korra

Y/n, tearing up: I always knew I’d end up in hell.

-

Lin: Having trouble figuring out who knows Korra the best?

Asami: Its me!

Bolin: Its me!

Mako: Its me!

Y/n:..

Y/n: It’s probably not me.

-

Y/n: Time for plan G.

Mako: Wait- don’t you mean plan B?

Y/n: No we did plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over C because of some technical difficulties.

Asami: What about plan D?

Y/n: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.

Bolin: And plan E?

Y/n: Im hoping not to use it, I die in plan E.

Korra: I like plan E.

-

Y/n: What the fuck? People actually tell their crushes they like them?

Mako: Well, what do you do?

Y/n: I die? Pfft- What kinda question..

-

Y/n: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and it died.

Y/n: Then I started thinking. It was just trying to get food.

Y/n: Like, what if I went to the fridge to get something to eat and it slammed the door on me and broke my neck?

Y/n: Howw would I feel?

Mako: Are you ok?

-

Bolin: What does ‘take out’ mean?

Mako: Food.

Asami: Dating.

Korra: Murder.

Y/n: IT COULD MEAN ALL THREE IF YOURE NOT A FUCKING COWARD!

-

Korra: You’re a little obsessed with yourself aren’t you?

Y/n: Well if im not who else is gonna be?

-

[Y/n, throws bread at turtleducks]

Y/n: Do not forget this act of altruism. If I am ever in trouble, I expect you and your brethren to come to my aid. Do not forget.

-

Y/n: You’re the love of my life, I’d do anything for you.

Asami: I want you to take care of yourself and get enough sleep.

Y/n: Absolutely not.

-

Asami: My boyfriend is too tall to kiss, what should I do?

Korra: Punch him in the gut, then when he leans down kiss him.

Bolin: Tackle him

Y/n: Dump him, be with me.

Lin, passing by: Kick him in the shin.

Mako: Please don’t do any of those.

-

[Korra, sneaks into house at 2 am]

Mako, turns in swivel chair: Care to explain where you were?

Korra: Uhh.. I was out with Y/n.

Y/n, also turns around in another swivel chair: Care to- [chair wont stop turning] Mako- I cant stop the chair-

-

Bolin, after making Y/n mad: You wont hit me, I have witnesses.

Y/n: Mako. Asami. Turn around.

[Both Mako and Asmai turn around]

Bolin, scared: M-Mako? Asami?

-

Y/n: So whats Zukos type?

Sokka: Y/c eyes, kind, oblivious, good sense of humour, turtleduck lover.

Y/n: Damn, sounds kind of like me. Too bad we’re just friends though.

Sokka: Did I mention oblivious?

Y/n: Yeah why?

Sokka: Just making sure.

[nmn-yty]

— ๋࣭ ⭑࿐ sweet tooth ｡o♡⋆˚｡⋆.

pairing: kim leehan x reader

summary: leehan teases you while you eat sweets＾＾

tags: 「SFW! fluff! uh... that's it | referring to members by real names e.g. donghyun, sanghyuk (it felt right) | kissing and cuddling from ur sweet crush leehan | reader has no gender! leehan loves everyone~」

word count: 1.4k

a/n: this is my first story on tumblr but im not new to writing stories online! (cough cough my abandoned wattpad cough cough) i decided to write this bc... i cant stop thinking abt leehan hjsjdkhw he's so dreamy... anyways,,, (also my first time writing in 3rd pov so... pls be kind><) i hope you enjoy!

+ stylized lowercase, missing punctuation (not done on purpose), and minimal to no revisions

"can i have a stick?"

there's no way he would actually play this game with you, right? he has his own food sat on the arm rest of the end of your couch. you sit on the opposite end, facing towards him with a pocky stick half eaten in your hand.

"look at how many snacks you have, no way, these are mine!" you say as you finish the stick.

he took your comment harshly, as he started to flash his puppy dog eyes at you accompanied with a pouty frown.

what kim donghyun didnt realize was moments like these are one of the many things you liked most about him. the way his face is perfect in every emotion. how you melt everytime he smiles and shuts his eyes from laughing. the way he constantly pushes up his big glasses because he's really overdue for an eye checkup. how his hair is always the perfect length and the way it bounces, even when he takes the smallest steps... and his perfect puffy lips that pout out when he doesn't get his way.

"can i just have one, please!"

you thought he could never annoy you, but you're reaching your limit. you stare at him and chomp down another stick in seconds.

"mmmh! this chocolate tastes so good."

you closed your eyes in delight, showing donghyun he's really missing out on the snack.

your eyes widened at his sudden movement. he uses his pointer and thumb to lift your chin up, "and what would you do if i took a stick from your mouth?"

you can feel a light wave of pink start to appear on your face. you look away from his gaze, anything to not look embarrassing in front of your crush.

"there's no way you would do that," you can feel the box of pocky shake in your hand as donghyun grabs a piece from the bag.

"how about from my mouth instead?" he says as he lets go of your chin and places the stick in his mouth. he gives a slight smirk as he wiggles the stick slightly in between his teeth, waiting for you to respond.

was he flirting with you? this whole scenario seemed like a dream, how could he be teasing you so much at this time? did he get intel from your other friends? sanghyuk and jaehyun do tend to be chatty so it wouldn't be a surprise if they accidentally slipped your secret to donghyun.

he stopped your spiraling thoughts when he inched closer to you on your end of the couch. you were touching knees at this point. he got so close that the chocolate end of the stick was right in front of your lips. moving back any further would result in you folding your legs up to your chest, pressed against the arm of the couch in an uncomfortable position.

your body moved before your mind did. you quickly took a small bite of the stick in order to create more distance between you and him. the stick split perfectly down the middle. you never craved and hated chocolate so much in your life before.

you finally locked eyes with him again, only to find him eating the rest of the stick, smiling at the way he could easily make you flustered. the boys definitely told him something, there's no way.

he reached into your box again to grab another stick, this time he pointed the uncoated side of the stick to your mouth.

"ahhh," he said, wanting you to open your mouth, "my turn!"

you gave in once again, holding the stick lightly between your teeth, making it easy to move around. donghyun moved in close to the chocolate end, about to take a bite, but you had other plans. you quickly moved the stick to the side, making him open his eyes wide, shocked at your playfulness. he moved fast to try and catch the stick, but he wasn't faster than the movement from your mouth. it started to get more and more funny seeing him try to catch the stick. you both started to giggle and smile at the fun game at hand. the fun ended though when he finally caught the stick, and he was even closer to your face than expected.

there was about 3 inches of space between you two left, and the distance made you freeze. you can feel yourself burning up again. what were his intentions with you? was he teasing you because he was bored? or did he actually receive some knowledge about you liking him and this is him reciprocating?

your mind went blank when you saw him continue. he inched closer and closer to you, nibbling the stick until he was right in your face. you couldn't take it anymore. there had to have been at most a centimeter left of the stick, because you leaned in to catch the end of the stick and you felt your lips crashing harshly into his. you gave him a small, but impactful peck, and moved away quickly to see his reaction. he cupped his hand over his mouth, way to make the first kiss one you'd never forget.

"so youre the one who got to steal the first kiss, huh? you didn't have to give me a bruise though.."

"you wanted to kiss me first?"

"wasn't it obvious?"

you rubbed your thumb on his bottom lip signaling that you were sorry. you looked into his eyes again, both of your minds seemingly thinking the same things.

he placed his hand on your cheek to move your face back to his, meeting his lips once again. this time it was more passionate and slow. you both took your time feeling each crevice of each other's mouth. it started to get a little sloppy, you both couldn't believe this was actually happening, so the kiss turned into a rush of passion being exchanged. it was almost like this was the last kiss you both were going to experience, so you had to make it count. you finally got to feel his soft lips on yours, playing with his tongue as he moved your body closer to his. he started to let out little vocal breaths along with the existing panting from the both of you. hearing how much he was enjoying himself drove you to insanity. was he really as shy and aloof as you thought he always was? or does he know exactly what he wants and he's very good at hiding this side of himself from you?

you were the first one to pull away, a small line of saliva connected your lips, and you quickly pecked him to become disconnected. you stared at him in disbelief, trying to regain a normal heartbeat but light pants still filled the air.

"come here," donghyun propped one of his arms on the top of the couch, motioning for you to move next to him so you two could cuddle.

"did we really just kiss each other again?" you wanted to hear more affirmations from his mouth instead of the fantasy in your mind.

"yes darling, we just kissed."

darling? that pet name made your heartbeat rise up again, causing you to bury your face into his chest.

he started to hum quietly and pet your head softly, you dont know how much of this you can take. it felt like at any moment you were going to melt into a puddle. you started to calm down after a while, moving your arms around him, to hold him tight and never let go of this moment.

you heard a strange ruffled noise coming from the side of you, his arm around you acting like a shield to prevent you from looking. you heard tiny chomps of a familiar stick coming from his mouth. you collected yourself and looked up at his face, only to see a half eaten pocky stick in his mouth. once he locked eyes with you, he quickly ate the stick whole to try and hide the evidence.

you smiled and started to tease him again, "i told you those are my snacks!"

you tried to grab the box from him, but he was familiar with the game you showed him not too long ago. he moved very fast, and catching the box from his hands felt impossible. you both started to giggle again, wishing this perfect moment could last forever.

© nmn-yty ★

[wonkawinka]

we’ll meet again

“we’ll meet again… don’t know where, don’t know when…”

alastor x angel!daughter!reader

CHAPTER TWO: smile like you mean it!

— — CHAPTER THREE: weak ankles!

warnings/notes: EPISODE 6 SPOILERS! not proof read, no use of y/n, used she/her pronouns, reader is on the fem side, maybe vaggie x reader and maybe emily x reader if you squint but its all platonic

chère- french for dear

remercier dieu- french for thank god

court reporter- someone who transcribes everything said during a court meeting

wc: 2336

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

ROLLER skates. flashy lights. bursting colors. street jazz at every corner. twists and turns.

NEW ORLEANS had it all. all you could need in your heart. soft, live jazz rung through the tiny diner that everyone got their morning coffee from. skating through the diner, you tipped your hat from one couple to another. there was the occasional (and by occasional you mean somewhat often) jerk who flirts with you, a teenager, but you brush it off.

ever since the stock market crash of 1929, people have been living off the hook ‘round these parts. you were lucky enough to snag a job, let alone have a father that's able to put food on the table for you.

the bell of the door rings exactly at 9:01 am, you don’t even need to turn around to check who it is.

“good mornin’ ladies! fine morning today, isn’t it?” alastor’s voice rang through the diner, sound waves bouncing the walls and into your ears. his presence was certainly not something anyone would miss. your coworkers nodded in agreement, saying their tiny welcomes, the occasional giggle for one of them.

pouring out straight black coffee into a medium sized cup, you skated towards the counter and slipped your dad a napkin and his cup.

“mornin’ papa.” you said with a smile, taking his coins and filing it into the register.

“good morning, my dear!” he said with his chipper smile, one that made the men grumble and ladies swoon, but it just made you happy to see your father happy. “day treating you well, i hope.”

he took the coffee and took a sip. a sound of satisfaction left his lips “perfection! you know me so well, chère.”

“pa, you drink the blackest coffee on earth. it’s not hard to mess up, dontcha think?”

“ah, don’t sass me now, little miss. i’ll have you know this is the best coffee i’ve had since yesterday mornin’!”

“i made that coffee yesterday morning.”

“hmmm, did you now? seems i dont remember…” he grinned teasingly, pushing up his glasses in ‘thought’.

“yeah, course ya’ dont, ya old man.” teasing back, slipping him a slice of pie “i know you didnt eat, pops, cant have ya flopping dead during your morning show. who knows, maybe the cannibal will getcha. then i’ll have to take over the show.”

he smirked at her words, ha, if only she knew.

“well, aren’t you the sweetest little thing?” he said, taking the to-go box from her hands.

“well, you raised me, so you tell me.” you smiled brightly

his laughter rang through the diner, and soon yours as their vocals mixed together in a medley of sounds. they nearly mixed together perfectly. nearly.

some people looked at you weirdly, but you both never really minded. everyone in town knew you were his daughter and everyone in town knew he was your father. the talk of the town, especially when people found out your father of all people adopted you all those years ago.

he smiled at you wholeheartedly, something you only get to receive from him. “thats my girl.” his hand cupped your face, thumb brushing against the skin.

you placed your hand on top of his and smiled. “love ya’, pa.”

“love you more, my dear.”

you patted his hand, signing him to let go. “now shoo, before you’re actually late. you got an audience waiting for you all ‘round the area. can’t have them sitting for too long, hm?”

with a tip of his head, he bidded you and the ladies of the diner farewell, grabbing his coffee and pie, slipping out the door.

one of your coworkers called out your name “hunny, you better help a girl out! is your fatha’ up for grabs?” she giggled, winking at you.

“oh hush, lonnie! that's my dad..!”

——————— PRESENT.

“OH, don’t worry, it’s really not that hard! you just flip the book and let them in! see? simple.” st. peter directed you to the golden podium of the pearly white gates.

“are you sure i’m even allowed to do this? look.. i’m happy to help. i just don’t wantcha to get in trouble with the Seraphims.” you floated down onto the podium, scanning the big book of entries.

“it wouldn’t be for long! thank you so much, by the way. you really are heaven’s little helper, huh?” he elbowed you and gave that big smile he had. it was almost blinding. literally.

“haha, yeahhh… if you say so.” you turned and flipped through the pages for what seemed to endlessly go on.

“who names their kid breakfast?”

“now, now, we dont go and judge what those humans name their offspring!” he placed his two hands on your shoulders in reassurance. you cock an eyebrow at his word choice, but next thing you know hes already flying off to do who knows what. ‘saintly duties.’

“huh.” you continued to flip through the pages to examine the very odd name choices, nodding at some and… skipping through others.

minutes, maybe even hours went by until sudden echoes from down the golden pathway filled your ears. they shoot up in reaction to the newfound sound.

“uhhh, heelloooo? helloooo!” the blonde hair girl called out

“hiya!,” you call out , “how may i help ya’? well, getting into heaven i guess, huh?” you laughed at yourself, watching the girl’s nerves calm down a bit. behind her was a recognizable individual. you know, it nearly looked like vagg—

“OH— uh, uh, uh— hello! my name is charlie morningstar. heh.”

“alright, lets see…” you flipped through the alphabetized record only to find every name known to man BUT a charlie morningstar.

panic fills your core when you cant find it, scanning the page over and over and over again to no avail.

“uhhhh, you see, slight problem, hun...” you start, throwing in a name to ease her name. “i, uhm, can’t find your name… but you know! the trek all the way to the uh, other place, is a long way. maybe i can like… sneak ya’ in—”

“OH, no, no, THAT won’t be necessary. uh— see, my dad got me this meeting, so maybe try lucifer… morningstar..”

THAT CERTAINLY RANG A BELL.

“OH, uh.. uhuh.” you nod “i see.” you nod quicker. your eyes darted to the gray haired girl who looked at you with the same tense expression.

“i think there may have been a, um..” you put your hands together “mishap… but i am SURE it is a just BIG misunderstanding, haha!”

a mighty voice called out to you, one that could shake all of heaven’s foundation.

“remercier dieu…” you say, quite literally.

“don’t worry, we can take it from here.” sera’s voice reassured, the normal call smile present on her face. you bowed your head in respect which she kindly returns.

behind her was an excited emily which shot you an ecstatic wave. her smile was about to explode with happiness which only grew more as she approached charlie, the princess of hell.

st. peter pops out of nowhere and of course, starts singing his welcome song.

see, you didnt think it was bad, it was quite good, but hearing it over and over again for the past century really takes a toll on your ears.

after his musical number, em is basically ready to explode into a pile of rainbows and sparkles. “oh, oh! i gotta show you! the zoo, the petting zoo, the aquarium, the- the EVERYTHING!”

her and charlie jump for joy as they start running off.

“oh come on, do we need to ru— yEUP okay.” you’re dragged along the crossfire, em tugging on your wrist.

you catch a glimpse of adam and lute. they did not seem… very ecstatic.

hm.

“em. emily. emmy. e.” you bring her to the stop. her happiness was contagious, a sickness, her happiness basically flooding into your veins.

“i know you’re excited, sugar,” you start, “but maybe, i show them their room first. how's that sound?”

with some reluctance, emily allows you to guide the two girls to their temporary room.

“here, let me get that—” with an easy spell you learned, you pick up their bags weightlessly.

“follow me, i’ll show ya your room.”

— — — — — — — — — — — —

on the way there, you’re bombarded with questions from the princess. not that you were complaining of course, you found it quite endearing.

“wow, your sprinkles have RAINBOWS in them?!”

“yup, those are just rainbow sprinkles,” you chuckle lightly at her innocent excitement, “so.. about this hazbin hotel you were talkin’ about, mrs. morningstar…”

“oh, please, call me charlie!”

“charlie,” you smiled ,”i really do love the idea. quite innovative! you have my support. do you already have people staying?”

“oh, we only have.. two residents. but we do have lovelt staff! we have a maid.. nifty, she’s harmless, most of the time.. and a bar-tender, husker, he’s great, grumpy, but great! vaggie, my lovely girlfriend keeps the hotel safe,” she smiles brightly at her partner, “oh, and our host, alastor! he’s uh.. the radio demon, BUT HE MEANS WELL! i think.”

the name rung in your mind, bouncing off the walls and causing them to shoot jolts through your head. it was like a migraine, but worse. radio demon. it was strikingly familiar resemblance to your father (father?), but who knows! there are probably many alastors that loved radio.

“i see,” you nod, “well i wish you luck on the growth of your hotel.” you opened the entrance of there room and landed their bags perfectly in the corner.

“wow, okay, i LOVE heaven! everythings so clean and nice! AHH, and emilys going to bring me to a zoo where everythings fluffy and soft!” you zone out the rest of their conversation before charlie bids her goodbye.

“safe travels, charlie.” you bow your head in respect, earning a giggle from the princess.

“thank you sososososo much for your help! heh, alright SEE YOU LATER!”

silence filled the room.

“vaggie.” you started, not bothering to around and fully face her. “knew that was you, cant hide from me under all that hair. looks good, though.”

“uhhhhhhhhhhh—” she says your name in a frantic manner, causing you to cock your eyebrow “ah, fuck, i can’t think of an excuse.”

“look, vaggie, i dont know.” you sigh “you disappear for your ‘yearly outing’ to god knows where then you go missing for years, now you come back to be dating lucifer’s daughter.”

“i know, i’m so—“

“no no, don’t apologize. i get it. im happy for ya, vags, but damn, years. i dont know what you do on that one day, but adam and lute didnt seem very happy when they saw ya today.” pinching the bridge of your nose, you turned to her.

“look, adam tried recruiting me to god knows what when you went missing. said i got good aim or something. im just telling ya to be smart. i got no idea what he was trying to do with me, so im telling ya’ to not give in to that prick. i’ll be at todays meeting; i work as the court reporter.”

she pondered your statement for a bit, snapping out of her thoughts once you handed her the room key. you offered her a smile, which she hesitantly returned.

“ah, come on, smile like you mean it! though a smile may not mean everything, you’re never fully dressed without one.” that phrase rang in vaggie’s ears. that was oddly familiar.

a little too familiar.

it was your time to bid farewell, but before you did, she called out to you.

“thank you.”

“ah, don’t mention it. we’re friends, arent we?”

and with that you shut the door.

— — — — — — — — — — —

SCRIBBLING. writing. swirls of ink as you titled the paper in preparation. COURT ISSUE 36789127. it made you think, whos counting all these issues?

“WHAT’S UUUP, BA-BY!” the annoying ring of adam’s voice filled the court room. he was like a toddler, ironic as he is the oldest human soul known to mankind. he was mankind. a sick joke for it too.

every little thing he said you were required to write down, even if it was a dumb, immature response.

“we are gathered here today to determine whether or not a soul in Hell, can be redeemed into heavenly realm by the means of this Hazbin Hotel… Princess Morningstar?”

the blonde takes a stand and clears her throat,

“Webster’s Dictionary defined redemption as—”

you scribbled that down.

“..incredible progress..”

scribble.

“… the porn demon …!”

scribble.

“well, if you know so much, what do you think it takes to get into Heaven?”

that puts a halt in the discussion, causing you to lift your head and wait for an answer. she had a point. how did you get here in the first place?

a copy of adam’s terms were presented to your table: act selfless, don’t steal, stick it to the man.

well damn, if those were the terms, even your father (father?) would be in heaven, right now.

evidence was presented, words have been thrown, objections were made. the endless back and forth of right and wrong being thrown around the courtroom. not even the written word could convey the thick tension lathering the walls of the heavenly court.

all the evidence weights to charlie’s side, and yet, the judges say otherwise.

“wait, none of you know what gets someone into Heaven?”

this sparks a musical entrance from emily which you would say was surprising, but you would be lying to yourself.

good thing i took band and choir you thought. perfect pitch came in handy as you noted every chord and pitch in your work.

at this point, you were ready to combust. it was clear who won but the rulers of heaven seemed adamant to keep it from happening. it was suspicious, ironic even.

“..don’t you care, sera…”

scribble.

“..just because someone was dead..”

scribble.

“he blew the shot like the cocks in his…”

scribble.

“..come down and exterminate you..”

your quill snaps in half as you look up from your paper. extermination.

murder.

genocide.

from heaven itself.

[toreigh]

CAN I REQUEST SUB! KEN WITH W PRAISE KINK PLEASE 🙏 ur amazing ily

Those eyes | ken!ryan x reader

summary: Set in the real world, you take Ken to the fair for the first time. Having a little too much fun, things get.. A little out of hand in the House Of Mirrors. Need I say more, someone ends up on their knees. Also loosely based off the song Those Eyes- New West. MINORS DNI.

pairings: ken!ryan x reader

word count: 1,719

warnings/notes: SMUT! p in v, cursing, spitting, unprotected sex, creampie, praise kink, oral (m receiving), sub dynamics. ken is obsessed with you, but what’s new?

“Ready?” You said.

“So ready.” He replied smiling.

You took Kens hand leading him to the Ferris Wheel. You had come here last week with Gloria and she showed you everything there is to a fair.

"C'mon you're gonna like this one a lot." You said smiling.

Bringing Ken to the fair made him act like a kid again. He was pointing at what you two should do next, smiling ear to ear. He also said he would win you a pink teddy bear.

You were just admiring the view. Both of the views actually. All the lights down below, and Ken. The perfect taper of his jaw, the way his eyes look. He was all yours.

After getting off you took him to a couple more rides before he insisted on winning you the pink teddy from earlier.

You watched as he scored perfectly, winning it with ease. He handed it to you proudly.

"Thank you, my perfect boy." You praised. His cheeks flushing a bright shade of pink.

"Let's go there's a food you just have to try." You said pulling him in the directions of funnel cakes. Bear in one hand Kens hand in the other.

Once you got it Ken was walking towards a table trying to eat it on the way, and got a little bit of whipped cream on his nose. It made you giggle and when he asked what was up you just took a picture, showing it to him. Causing him to give you the same mark, and you two broke out laughing in the middle of the crowd, and no one else knew why.

Sitting down you fed each other the funnel cake like a couple on their wedding night. You had the most fun possible. By the end of it you were food drunk, and gave this devastating smile. Well honestly he thought everything you did was perfect.

"Cmon there's one more thing we have to try before it closes." You said taking his hand. The House of Mirrors.

Being one of the last people in line you had to use the restroom so you told Ken to wait there of course. He didn't really protest.

He did get a little worried when he had to enter without you, but oh would you be back.

It takes all of five minutes before he's lost though. A few minutes pass by with nothing but his own reflection. Off in the distance Ken hears faint shuffling sounds. Ken can feel his heart rate increasing.

"Kennyy!" You call out knowing he's close. You let out a small giggle as he lets out a relaxing sigh.

Thats when he sees you dressed in that white and pink outfit he couldn't get enough of.

"Stop it" He bites out, as its still only your reflection.

"Are you alone Kenny?" You ask.

"Obviously," He breathes. Trying to pin point your reflection still. He honestly gives up waiting for you to find him.

When he suddenly feels hot breath on his back, sending shivers down his spine. You press your front to his back snaking your arms around his slutty waist.

"Thats such a good boy." You mutter.

He spins around looking down at you ready to respond when you crash your lips to his. He can't get enough of you, his hands finding your waist rubbing up and down. He sucks your bottom lip into his mouth. Your like a drug he cant recover from at this point. He pulls away only for you kiss him again deepening the slutty kiss.

You suck his bottom lip into your mouth, making his cock throb and he suddenly remembers what its like for you to have your hot little mouth around his cock. He moans involuntarily at the sensation.

You can taste the arousal at this point kissing him like its the last thing you'll ever do.

"Wait B just wait," He said sounding on edge. "what if someone catches us, really?" He finishes

"Mmm is someone scared? That's the fun of it Kenny." You said rubbing your bottom lip.

You spin him around to look at himself standing behind him you wrap your arms around him.

"Do you know what I love about The House of Mirrors?" You asked.

"What?" He said meeting your eyes in the mirror.

"I can see how perfect you are," you say creeping your hand lower "from every" your hand grazes over the most masculine part of him. "single, angle." You say squeezing him through his jeans causing him to involuntarily buck into your slight grip.

You slip off his jean jacket, reaching for the hem shirt you look at him for permission, he simply nods for an answer. Breathing heavily though his nose. You undress him slowly earning shivers down his cool skin.

Once he's fully undressed you step back getting a good look at his tanned, toned frame.

"You have to undress to." He said feeling very exposed.

"Well Kenny if you want that, you're gonna have to do it." You say twirling your hair around your finger.

He gives you the same respect. Slowly undressing you.

"Your soaked B." He said looking up at you as he pulls your pink panties down your thighs.

"Only for you, can't help it baby." You say in a seductive tone.

When he's done he stands back up looking down at you.

You give a smile that almost brings him to his knees.

Now it's show time. You kiss him on the lips then under the jawline, slowly creeping lower. Peppering kisses all over. You make sure to take it extra slow on the V-line. Making him let of inpatient whimpers, you know he's not proud of.

Finally wrapping your little hand around the base he lets out a frustrated sigh. You kiss his angry red lip adorning a bead of arousal.

"The perfect fucking cock." You praise looking up at him through your lashes as his cock twitches getting harder at the praise.

You finally let your tongue come out teasing his tip, wrapping your lips around the tip finally. You make sure to set a devastatingly slow pace.

His hips struggle to stay still after a while, you pick up the pace teasing the underside of his head. You see him struggling to hold back and know he's close. His hands find your hair, not to guide you or force you anywhere, but purely because he needs something to hold onto.

Only when you felt him twitch in your mouth did you pull of with a audible pop.

Leaving him whimpering with need and his cock twitching with want.

Right before he spoke you cut him off. "But I want your cum inside me."

"You asked so nicely." He said taking your hand and helping you up.

You turned towards the mirror running the tip through your slick folds. You didn't even need foreplay just him.

He finally pushed in and you both gasped at the feeling. You felt so full, and your warm slick cunt was clenching him so, so good. He started to move slowly.

Starting to move fast you could feel him hitting your G-spot.

"Fucking me, so, good." You moaned out each word punctuated by a thrust. His cheeks always flushed it turned him on, his praisee kink through the roof.

Fluttering around you knees got week as you started to go down to the cool glass floor and he followed.

Then he leaned back, scooting his legs underneath you, and he placed you solidly on his lap. Your knees were arched, sitting on the lower of his stomach as he tucked a hand behind, keeping the other one on your clit.

He stroked you hard now. Four fingers abused your swollen area as he fucked up into you. You started to moan from the sudden stimulation as he watched you with grave interest in the mirror. Your head tilted back onto his shoulder, but no he wanted you to watch.

“Look at yourself while you come. Watch yourself come on my cock.” He said into your ear making you whimper and look up at him.

You felt your tummy tighten and build. It all felt like too much as you started to squirm. That unfamiliar knot unraveled at a speed so intense that stars prickled in your eyes. Everything turned black. Pitch black. So dark that you believed you passed out for seconds.

You came in a way you’d never done before. Your orgasm squirted out. Hips and dick covered in juices. Because he held you down on his dick as you came, he always did.

“Look at you, you’ve made a mess of us.” He said smirking at you, and caressing your boob. You whimpered leaning forward as his dick fell out, he whimpered at the loss of heat.

You turned around pushing him back so his back hit the cool glass. You finally got on top again wasting no time riding him hard. He began to moan he was so close again.

You kissed kiss swollen lips, before pulling back and whispering in his ear.

"C'mon gotta give it to me, that perfect cock always fucking me so good." You said as you felt him get impossibly harder and buck his hips.

"Give it to me my perfect boy." You said sweetly.

You stuck two fingers into his mouth pulling his bottom lip down and spit, and he swallowed it.

You kissed his lips praising him, sliding your tongue in his open mouth. You kissed him until he came inside you feeling warmth pool in your tummy. Kissing him till he couldn't kiss you back head thrown back in pleasure. His big hands slowly lifted you up because he was so sensative.

He helped you get dressed pulling your pink panties back up and using two fingers to push him cum inside. Pulling your shirt over your head he stood kissing your forehead.

After you gave him the same respect pulling his jean jacket on you could see him watching you in the mirror.

"What 'cha looking at." You said giggling.

"I just... cant get enough of you."

[arisuraxz]

Twinkling Watermelon (pt.2)

summary: you fell in love with beomgyu first, but he fell harder.

warning: cursing

taglist: @eclipse-777 (lmk if you want to be tagged!)

im actually happy writing this JIHSUIYGSIHI but hope u enjoy!1!!!

if you havent read part 1, look at my page!

beomgyu was holding you, and running, rushing to the hospital. beomgyu was actually worried because a guy has to take care of a girl, right?

and this is how it started. Beomgyu at the time beomgyu now has a crush on you. Blushing hard. As soon as he went to the hospital, he shouted.

"nurse! help! this girl collapsed! help!"

the nurse ran up to beomgyu, to take care of you, so they put you into a rolling hospital bed, and took you into a room.

🪢

an hour later, you still haven't woken up. the nurses talking to beomgyu, saying something.

"mr. choi, for this, you have to sign a paper for y/n," as she passes out the paper to beomgyu.

"oh yeah, ofc, nurse!"

well, beomgyu didnt know what to do. he just thought of 'its just letters all over the paper' in his mind. all he did was just put his signature in the paper.

"thank you!" beomgyu told to the nurse.

so he ran, to check on you, so he went to the room your in, and checked to see if your okay. as he was checking, you woke up. you saw yourself lying down in a rolling hospital bed, looking around, and before you realized you were even in a hospital, you saw beomgyu. you were shocked. you asked yourself in your mind, 'did he take you to the hospita-'

"y/n? are you okay? im so glad you woke up!" he was relieved, he was waiting for 1 hour, and 15 minutes for you to wake up.

huh? you didnt know what was happening, and you finally realized, you were in a hospital.

"beom-beomgyu? what are you doing here?" you said, clueless.

"you dont need to know about that, y/n, are you really okay? you got me worried."

"yeah, im okay, i think im gonna go now" you got out of your bed and went outside, going to your home.

"wait nono, y/n! are you hungry? i can take you to a restaurant and ill pay you!"

wait, what? hes really paying me? we arent even close, or not even friends, but this? Nah, no way.

"no, im not hungry, now leave me alone. my mom will be angry at me." then, your stomach rumbles.

"ehehehhheh!! what do you mean? your hungry! hahahah!!" you realized, so you covered your stomach with your arms and you walked away. and, beomgyu was infront of you again.

"nonononono y/n, im sorry! ill actually pay you! which restaurant do you wanna go? anywhere, y/n! i dont care if its expensive, ill pay you!" he begged, with his puppy eyes, watering.

"fine. lets go to the restaurant there."

so you both went to the restaurant you wanted to go, and he was actually serious. he did pay you. after he paid, you and beomgyu went to the table, waiting for the food. and maybe after twenty minutes. the foods finally here. you both were eating peacefully, and you looked at beomgyu, eating, and damn, he looked so pretty. you were admiring him. beomgyu realized, and as soon as he realized, you went back to eating your food. Beomgyu was blushing, crazy, like, actually crazy. he was blushing so hard, that his legs are swinging and kicking. so he went back to his food, and he was about to tell you something.

"y/n, do you like your food?" he wondered.

"yeah, i do, do you?" you wondered back.

"ofc i do! why? did you think that my food was bad?"

"what? no! im also just wondering" you told to beomgyu.

and you both went back to eating your food.

🪢

you both were walking to your guys home, and around 8pm, and you normally was supposed to be home at 5pm, but you didnt care at all. you didnt want to ruin the moment.

"hey, y/n, since we are going home, ill give you my number. so, if you need any help, contact me. ill be here for you. or, if you cant, please think about me!" while he said that, he showed you his number.

your heart felt like it was about to burst. you were blushing, and beomgyu was too. so you smiled.

"your smiling.." beomgyu looked at you, as he said quietly.

"what did you say?" you asked.

"what, y/n?"

"oh, nevermind."

"well, y/n, please walk home safe! ill see you tomorrow!!" he ran. "tornado!"

you look at him, running. then, you walked home. while you walked home, you were thinking about the scene that happened with you and beomgyu. you were happy. you never been so happy before in your life.

part 3 will be released maybe tomorrow!!! this is okay i was actually blushing while doing this because i was imagining the whole scene lol

hope you enjoyed, ffolks!

[hunterbunter3000]

if theres anything i love more its chaotic sweetheart oml its so fckin funny

i just thought of like during TF 141 missions, meetings or just out of nowhere sweetheart will sometimes say "omg this reminds me of when i got ban from the aquarium in [where ever tf] cause i jumped into the shark tank to pet the sharks" or she hears that they're going to a place like italy or europe for a mission and shes like "im actually ban from like 3 of their museums" or whatever

and the team think shes fucking with them but they find out its true because she has videos and pictures of her doing these things and they're all like : 😦😟😀 huh??

like imagine they're at a zoo or aquarium and shes like "bet me $20 to jump in?" and they're all actively trying to hold her back so she doesn't get banned again 😭 they have her on those backpack leashes when they go out 💀

HAHAHHAHA I CANT

THIS IS SO HER 100000%%%%

She said something unhinged before, but they didn't believe her

(TF 141 watching the american news. Someone was arrested for trying to steal a fish from the same aquarium Sweetheart stole from)

Sweetheart: HA! Oh my god, my brother and I did that once there.

Gaz: Go to the aquarium?

Sweetheart, reminiscing: Yeah, and we went fishing there to catch some sea creatures. We caught this japanese spider crab and started running cause the police and workers started chasing us. But we got away! AND GOD THAT CRAB WAS SO GOOD-- I don't know why people don't eat those more!

🧍‍♀️

AHAHA ...girl please

So they all kinda chuckled at that, but Soap kinda prods at it more because he thought she was making up a story 💀

Soap, smirking: So... you stole a state protected Japanese Spider Crab from an aquarium. Got away with it. And ate it with your kin.

Sweetheart, smiling like a dummy: Yuh huh.

Soap, questioning her thought process: And only your brother?

Sweetheart, nodding: Yup! My mom said that since we had a brother-sister hangout day, he should get food and he did! OH OH WANNA SEE PICTURES?? I HAVE A FULL ALBUM

Soap: Whuh- WOAH YOU WERE TELLING THE TRUTH?!

Alex: WAIT WHAT

Sweetheart: of course I was! You thought I was lying?

Soap and Gaz: YES

Sweetheart: YOU GUYS HAVE MET MY FAMILY THIS SHOULDN'T BE SURPRISING

She was showing them pictures of when she was younger, like 13 years old, with her third older brother. And she was legit fishing in the aquarium with him 💀 she even has a video of her ACTUALLY CATCHING THE CRAB

And then some pictures of her brother boiling it in the back of his pickup truck and eating ALL OF IT (JAPANESE SPIDER CRABS ARE HUGE MIND YOU)

They were like 😨😨🤯 GIRL WHAT THE FUCK KINDA LIFE YOU LIVIN

So they believe the stories she says UNLESS she has pictures (and with every story she does 💀💀)

And omg her being banned in some places-- IN SOME STATES AND OUT OF COUNTRY BECAUSE OF THE UNLUCKY LUCK

Sweetheart, raising her hand: Wait where are we going?

Graves, rolling his eyes: To America.

Sweetheart: Uh huh yeah I got that but which state?

Graves: Ohio?

Sweetheart: Ahhhh okay. I can't go.

Graves, leaning on the table: And why is that, Sergeant Sweetheart?

Sweetheart: Well, Philip Graveyard, I'm banned.

Alex: What, in the facility?

Sweetheart, scratching her cheek: No the whole state.

Soap: WHAT

Ghost: HUH

Sweetheart, shrugging like she's talking about the weather: Yeah. Ohio, Florida, Wyoming, couple of other states, and some out of country.

Sweetheart, whispering: ...Alot out of country, honestly.

They're like what 🧍‍♀️

Soap, in disbelief: wh-why?

Sweetheart: Turns out, going on a plane with matches and a baton can cause a heck of a panic. And...

Sweetheart: ...It's illegal.

Ghost: OF FOCKIN COURSE ITS ILLEGAL

Sweetheart: WELL I KNOW THAT NOW. I WAS SEVENTEEN WHEN THAT HAPPENED

Soap: YOU WERE SEVENTEEN--

She showed pictures obviously.

Price, tired and confused: Why do you take pictures of everything you do.

Sweetheart: For the memories!

Graves, wiping his face: Oh my god...

Sweetheart: And evidence so I don't go to prison.

Soap, under his breath: Good lord

Price has to study on Sweetheart's past, so one: she won't get arrested anytime she goes out and two: so he can learn about this "unlucky luck" that's been happening for centuries in her family

(He still doesn't understand it)

And when they go on vacation together as a team it's a nightmare 💀

Sweetheart: Can't go on that.

Soap, smirking: Why? Awww, Sweetheart are ya scared?

Sweetheart: Nah, I'll get arrested. Restraining orders go craaaaazy stupid in London.

Soap and Gaz:

Gaz: How-- How do you get a restraining order on a ferris wheel...?

And then when they went to a zoo in Scotland (because she's not banned or has any restraining orders there) and this is so iconic

Sweetheart, looking in the cage and smiling: Bet me a twenty to jump in?

Gaz, snaps his neck and has a heart attack: Sweetheart, no--

Horangi, putting his hand on her shoulder: Please don't.

Sweetheart, scoffing playfully: I'm not! Oh my gosh. You actually have to bet me the twenty to actually do the--

König, Pulls out $100 because he wants to see this actually happen:

Sweetheart, looking at his hand:

Everyone looking at König's hand:

Sweetheart, looking up at König with a straight face:

Everyone looking at Sweetheart:

Ten seconds later:

Soap, struggling with Sweetheart: SWEETHEART NO STOP

Horangi, pulling Sweetheart's foot: DONT ACTUALLY JUMP IN THERE

Ghost, trying to push Sweetheart off the cage: GOD DAMMIT KÖNIG WHY DID YOU ACTUALLY GIVE HER MONEY TO DO IT

König: I THOUGHT SHE WAS BLUFFING

Price, pulling on Sweetheart's leg: YOU KNOW SWEETHEART DOESN'T BLUFF WHEN IT COMES TO THIS KIND OF THING

Sweetheart: GIVE ME THAT HUNNID BABAY

That was the last STRAW for price. So he ordered a human leash backpack for Sweetheart 💀

Sweetheart, holding the contraption: What is this?

Price, frowning with his arms crossed: It's a leash.

Sweetheart: Okay?

Price: For you.

Sweetheart:

Sweetheart, dumbfounded: W h a t

Price: When we go out for vacation, you're wearing this.

Sweetheart, brain loading the information she just heard:

Sweetheart: Are you... SERIOUS???

Sweetheart: I'm not some child, Price!

Price: Yet you act like one everytime we go out as a team!

Sweetheart: I'm just having fun!

Price: I DONT SEE HOW HANGING UPSIDE DOWN ON A FUCKIN' LEDGE ON THE EIFFEL FUCKIN' TOWER IS FUN

Sweetheart: THAT WAS ONE TIME

Price: AND ONE TIME TOO MANY

Price: You're wearing it.

And she wears it. Luckily it was in pink and she decorated it with stickers and charms.

Sweetheart, huffing and sitting on the ground with her arms crossed: This sucks cactus balls, man.

Ghost, walking with the leash: Come on, Sweetheart.

Sweetheart, whining: Weeeeeehhhhh...

Sweetheart, getting dragged: OW YOU'RE RUINING MY NEW JEANS AND MY FUCKING ASS-- OKAY OKAY I'LL GET UP

Ghost: Mhm.

[wonyrs]

fluster

enha hyungs x fmr gnr non-idol au, est. relationship warnings food wc 939 + library #

‘ enha hyung as ur 'homies' ! REQ

lee heeseung

" ayyy how u been bro?"

plays along and even replaces his normal petnames with something he'd usually call the members but NEVER you (until now)

um... hello? where is the endearing "why'd u call me that babe 😢☝️?" where is the begging for a kiss? where is the desperate attempts at pda we were hoping to see? this wasn't the plan at all (like... at ALL)

he tries to hide his laugh when u give him the stink eye and keeps up his act

even going as far to pretend like he isn't seeing ur hand inching closer to his and lifts it up to 'brush' the hair from his face

second attempt at holding his hand ended up with him fishing his phone out from his pocket and showing u an extremely!!! hilarious... insta reel.

ur plan has reversed; instead of him dying for ur affection, its now u trying to stop him from treating u like any other person before u physically cannot take it anymore

"ok man. i see how it is man. bye man." this is ur cue to stand up, run away and never look back for ur own emotional sake

if it weren't for heeseung GRIPPING onto ur shirt with the most gobsmacking laugh u've heard coming out his mouth, to the point tears were trsiling down his face from how hard he's laughing

"wait- wait [name]! you started it, come back!"

park jongseong

" how are u doing BABE? how's life BABE? "

mommm [name]'s acting weird again, i think the heat's getting to them

he acts like he can't see ur hand in the air and continues to kiss u right on the lips (but he still moves ur arm down for safety measures)

"what's good, dude?" "baby, who are u talking to? it's only us in this room lol 🤨"

u try again with dapping him up but immediately he turns around and oh so suddenly the wall is soooo interesting

for the whole hour u mess with him and call him 'bro, dude, gang' and shit like that while he just sneakily rolls his eyes and goes on with his day- while most likely wondering what on earth was wrong w u

he'd be in the kitchen washing the dishes while ure trying to hold his hand and have it dap urs up

but is he paying attention?

lmfao no

he goes on with his day since he knows u cant go another hour without his love and so he has nothing to worry about (unless u actually DO go for another hour, then he's actually going to believe something's wrong with u)

eventually u give up and go back to slumping on his back. the months u've spent together gave jay a clear understanding on ur antics and gave him some time to prepare for anything u had up ur sleeve

" tired already? an hour, new record babe. good job"

sim jaeyun

" why are u doing this to me "

the moment u refuse his hug and opt for a more... different greeting, jake malfunctions for a bit

he trys to hug u again but u extremely remain still

whines complains when u keep up the 'homeboy' act

"i swear we acted like a normal couple yesterday, did i make u mad pookie? 😥" sneaks in some of the petnames u absolutely LOATHE just for a reaction

hates when u replace the lovely kiss-and-hug interactions with dapping him up like a BRO

most likely complained to the enha gc abt ur 'unearthly' behaviour (u get his ass on that later) and cries that he might never see the old u again

the urge to drown him in all the love u've kept in since u met up is eating u alive But watching him practically cry over ur feet is helping u out a wee bit

"chat this is absolutely hilarious what are we thinking" "WOW! Hahaha so funny!! Such a kneeslapper! can u stop now 😐."

Hes dead serious when he says this btw Like full on eye contact with furrowed eyebrows, but a small pout is resting on his face

he was fine with the joke at first but then he just got more eager for ur touch as the hours went by

u stare for a bit before engulfing him in the biggest hug ever while peppering his face with an abundance of smooches

"finally! u dont know how long ive waited for this"

park sunghoon

" did u eat something funny? "

just stares. nothing else, just stares

eventually u have to drop ur arm because the silence just got too awkward

was he mad at u? (ofc not) Maybe hoonie just needed to load and take a bit to process the scene in front of him

"i dont think u should be doing this to your boyfriend, babe. it doesn't really fit the loving couple vibe yk 🤖"

even when sunghoon continues to act like everything's normal u keep on persisting with acting like close-bro-friends

... only to be met with the most baffled face ever.

he wonders if ure roleplaying as some character or just genuinely going insane

decides to go along with whatever you're doing and continue the day as normal as it can get

when u get tired of the lack of attention, u drop the act but unconsciously refer to him as bro

muscle memory(ish) fr

"dude can you at least act interested?" "um excuse me? what'd u just call me"

HELLO. where was this dumbfounded hoon when u need him?

ure actually laughing atp because he doesn't even look like he knew what was wrong

the whole time u kept up w the joke, he didn't even look like he cared UNTIL u got tired and talked in ur normal tone

"don't ever say 'dude' in a serious tone like that. scared me, babe."

@ wonyrs 2023

note sorry anon for not taking ur request after like 2 weeks... i've needed some motivation to write SORRY.. also maknae version is next :> requests open!