#i deleted my twitter app because it was making me anxious

[buffetsoo]

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[am-i-the-asshole-official]

WIBTA if i cut off someone reaching out for help on tumblr? i am a very anxious person. ive been on tumblr a very long time because most all other social media terrifies me as someone who grew up with the wild west internet a decade past (im in my late 20s) so i feel sometimes with how reckless and spurractic people can be online in chatroom and especially clearly public platforms where any stranger, malicious or otherwise can just archive your digital presence for personal use.

more recently as someone who has been here during the pornban and as an asexual really enjoyed the quiet with no drama farming and a slow pace to talk about more unique political topics in a measured way it is something im strangely nostalgic for and a great example of my sensibilities to people when they insist that i use other platforms like discord or twitter or whatever clone for these services comes out of the old guard introducing feature creep to copy everyone else or any other indi "were the anti corporate version" of the endless scroll apps. i just dont want it. tumblr is special because im desktop only, been here for years, and i have kept track of every single change made so i have manually adjusted the change through hacks to evade every bad decision on here and make my set up look identical to how it was in 2010. so let it be understood that i tend to be a loney person because of this stubbornness. web 3.0 is too dangerous to people with addictive tendencies that my adhd brings out and my need to wear my heart on my sleeve. so i hope i defended my personality type enough to show why someone like me would see a post about some horrible abuses they have fell victim to who also share alot of the marginalized status as me and writing depressive things in the replys of others posts as to attention seek about it.

i directly interact with this person, not only to check if they are real (but wow, modern chat bots make this part horrifying for me. we really cant ever know for sure what is real anymore. trying to find warmth on the internet feels impossible now a days) i have multiple conversations at this point both venting and just casually shooting the shit. but the begging for me to constantly repost their paypal makes me so nervous in a way that i feel so guilty for because it reminds me of all the scams that get associated with this kind of ebegging and the reminder that capitalism takes away all warmth from human interaction to make them purely transnational and conditional. but then it just has been escalating where im so scared that now its not enough that im reposing on my 8 follower, all mutual blog, they are asking me to share it on other socials. accounts i do not have i have a flip phone and a laptop and i am tinkering with a windows 7 tower that will never be connected to the internet so i can always have software sit perfectly in its time capsule for when i need it. i do not have a way to help this person outside of what i learned from collage psyche classes. a part of me is so scared to just abruptly cut them off and just delete my entire account like i tend to do often on tumblr for a multitude of reasons, its a part of what lets people survive being here this long but i worry that would crush them if i did that, i dont want to make them feel more hopeless and unwanted then they already talk about. but i am text on the internet through a screen. i can only do so much. so would i be the asshole if i just deleted my account with a "i hope you hang in there, the world is a harsh place but keep moving" to cut someone so similar to me who is struggling out of my life?

What are these acronyms?

[blacksaintlaurentboots]

The world is such an overwhelming, dark & sad place right now so I deleted my twitter app (maybe instagram soon?) off my phone because It’s making me so sad/a little anxious to constantly be getting notified of terrible, traumatic events as they’re happening in real time. Not to mention just the endless scrolling trap it’s so easy to fall into & the overconsumption of other people’s lives/opinions/thoughts. I can’t wait to delete all my social media and have no one know anything about me ever!

[jimimn]

i thank e.m. for one thing and one thing only: for solidifying my hate in men and rich people. he completely fcked an app just because he wanted to throw a temper tantrum. it's not fair to those people who worked on twitter for so long just to get thrown out of the door 2 weeks after he bought it. so many people have lost their jobs and for what. honestly i don't think twitter will shut down permanently. maybe they will shut it down temporarly when they need to figure out things but i don't think he will just push the big red delete button on it.

on the other hand, i'm a little scared of people coming here. and this might be a selfish approach, because i know tumblr has been dying and the lack of people are bad for both the site and ccs. but i got so used to the way tumblr is. and at least to me, army twitter is so different. they have a different idk culture? and the community can be very toxic and it makes me anxious, but i have never felt that on tumblr. i usually just go to twitter for translations(!!! so important), updates, cute pictures & edits, maybe scroll through a discourse or two. twitter is great for that, it's faster than tumblr, runs smoother than tumblr. and it might be selfish but i don't want people to come here and try to change this place into army twitter pt. 2. i've already seen posts mocking the streaming culture (and voting) part, and yeah... we don't need that here. i love the fandom, but sometimes they are very very exhausting. i feel like i will block a lot of people - something i rarely do.

everything you said 💯 we're just vibing here and having a good time i dont want that to be ruined sue me 😭 and abt that man. im just so. so many people lost their jobs. just bc of his big ego like 😭 and you're right, i dont think it'll shut down permanently either but then who knows 😭 these are dark times there is no denying fjfkjfflfkflflf

[rationalisms]

Omg you discord post is exactly what I’ve been thinking as well. I’ve joined it for fandoms and school groups and irl community stuff and each and every time I get so anxious that I end up going ghost. Speaking specifically on fandom though, I recently deleted my account and the app (love being #free) because the one to one feel of involvement is A Lot. I love screaming into the void and shooting off a stupid post way too much so having to think through everything I say is anxiety like I don’t actually want to feel like I’m in a chat room? Idk but it’s the same with twitter, I use it to crack some jokes but the extra sense of familiarity that seems to come with frequent interactions overwhelms me and everyone else just seems to be okay with it. I realize that’s a box of a social anxiety thing in general though. Anyway not that you asked bit this is why I don’t think I’ll ever leave tumblr it caters so perfectly to the hermit in me lol

oh bud i completely feel you, it's an absolute nightmare for people with any amount of social anxiety. pretty much the only reason i use discord is for ttrpg organizational purposes, and for the one movie watching/music league group chat with my group of friends; any servers i've joined that are bigger than that i go through the exact same process every time: agonize over what to say for several days because everyone else already seems incredibly familiar with each other in a way that's so deeply terrifying and intimidating and then eventually just leaving again. which sux! i wanna Take Part In Stuff and meet people who share my interests but i'm a big ball of anxiety and that setting is my nightmare... so i definitely get you. and good on you for deciding that you're no longer getting anything out of it and pulling the plug! it can be hard especially with how much it's assumed that you have certain social media and FOMO and alla dat, so i'm glad you were able to draw a line and i hope it helps make you feel more comfortable.

i don't mind twitter as much because it feels more passive in a lot of ways. like, engagement can just be a driveby fav or even if you do reply or someone replies to you there's an inherent built-in acceptance of delay in response or even just like. Acknowledgement By Fav Can Be Enough. which imo is definitely not the atmosphere for discord at least ime. but it's still not great for fandom stuff for a ton of other reasons including the complete lack of archiving. and honestly, i abandoned my public twitter for my locked down private one for a multitude of reasons and the anxiety around having to keep up some sort of Public Persona is definitely part of it, so i absolutely understand you on that level as well.

tumblr has its own issues obviously, but like you i never felt the same sense of pressure or dread here. a big part of that is obviously the whole reblog system in itself, in that it's totally fine and even encouraged to just, idk , silently curate pretty pictures for a bit and at most commenting in the tags when you have something to say or w/e, but also being able to do the whole shooting random thoughts into the void whenever you want to instead. it's also much, much easier to curate my experience here than anywhere else lol. much more robust blacklisting functions available (albeit reliant on third party extensions) and if you didn't choose to put something on your dash then tumblr won't for the most part force it on you. so that for sure helps.

idk, i don't have the solution! because like, yes in many ways discord and twitter are suboptimal for fandom stuff but in many ways it's also down to the fact that i do obviously have pretty severe anxiety around these things and struggle with it immensely in a way that a lot of people obviously don't. which sucks but isn't their problem.

i still think we should all move to dreamwidth though. if enough of us hermits congregate there other people eventually have to follow, right? that's how we all ended up on tumblr in the first place :x

[0li0s]

I wish Tumblr had a way to hide how many notes a post has. Like just for the user looking at their or others' posts. Instagram has this as an option (or did at some point). Artfol does it as a feature. You have to look into a metrics page yourself to see them. Visible metrics contribute significantly to negative experience on apps/sites for me.

My mental health when using Twitter undeniably tanked when views were made publicly visible on all posts. As consciously stupid as it is, I became overly concerned with the View-Like ratio. I never looked at view metric intentionally prior to this, because I knew how I'd get knowing it: anxious, depressed, and demotivated. (Incidentally, that's the same reason I would not want to know when or how I'll die. It's Forbidden Knowledge for a reason.) BUT I DIGRESS. This isn't just a Views problem. All metrics contribute to the comparison impulse, and dammit, I'm tired of people just telling me to #stop thinking about my metrics. That's like telling someone having a panic attack to just calm down: Far easier said than done.

It is not a coincidence that the only apps that don't make me immediately want to delete my account when I open them are Artfol and Discord: the two apps that do not have metrics as a major aspect of their use. Instagram was better with Like counts turned off. Turns out when you aren't having that stuff shoved in your face, you don't really think about them! Wow!

So that's my hot take for the month. I think all social media apps and sites should have an option to hide metrics.

[hualian-blessing]

hi, bella here again. ive migrated here like 3 months ago because of the first tommy neg in twitter which was fucking stupid. and i wanna like talk about how shitty twitter is once again.

i used to be like a semi-big fan account back in twitter before i got hacked so i would see like tons of shit in my tl and let me say, it was so shit that when i made a new account, i just stopped posting in it. i only look at twitter for stream updates, lore updates, fan contents, mcc updates and funny shit. and im very glad that i did it because look at the mess twitter is.

they trended tommy neg for days yet when he does a lore stream and joined in vc in wilbur's stream (4/4 sbi finally we have been fed), the same people who made tommy anxious and almost got him to the point of a panic attack suddenly kissed the ground he walked upon. like what the fuck? yall are just bandwagoning at this point if yall harassed a cc that is the same age as me then suddenly start supporting him and pretend that the shitstorm that happened a few prior moments ago didn't happened? what the fuck man.

then when the tommy neg ended, they started the quackity neg just because they misinterpreted the words said by quackity? and how they thought he's making fun of those who got sa/sh when all he did was raised his voice high and being serious about the issue at hand? seriously, the 5 year olds should touch grass-no should lie down and sleep on the grass cuz at this point, they'll look more stupid than an average person. don't get me started with the disgusting hate towards the sleepy and techno community in twitter. it's fucking stupid to insult and blocked those who were in the said two communities without the consideration that maybe they're not stupid to fall for cheap threads or found comfort in the ccs.

tl:dr stop, twitter just stop. delete yourself. remove the app from the internet. go camping or travel abroad to those who do such childish and cruel things to ccs who are still humans like us.

[sunshineseung]

sooo my unanswered asks from months ago have been making me very anxious because i feel bad answering new asks without acknowledging the old ones, so i just deleted all my asks (mostly asks from MONTHSSSS ago) and i’m sorry if you really really really wanted me to answer them but they were just making me scared of logging onto the app oops.

if you have any NEW asks to send me (that hopefully will be answered very soon!!!) then pls send them. my favorite thing currently is links to twitter porn with just a member’s name attached lol so go absolutely ham with the nsfw/dirty asks. okay thanks :)

[covermeinclouds]

i never talk about anything i do in my life outside the internet properly online because it's not really essential. so, here is a realistic life update:

3 weeks ago, i started working out. i saw this post about consistency over motivation. if you try to look for motivation every time you plan on doing anything, you won't get anywhere. motivation doesn't appear daily. consistency is something we produce and don't wait to be produced. i stuck by that. i work out everyday at 8am even when i'm tired and in pain.

adjusted my eating habits because it would be useless for me to workout and not eat well.

writing on my journal again even if i never know what to write about just so i could fit something more into my routine

physically pushing myself out of horrible ruts

planned out my budget for the whole year and following it without getting anxious (but of course, anxiety over money never leaves)

getting into new hobbies without thinking of getting better at it at all i just want to do something else besides stare at a screen all day

buying things for my room! fucking finally. this one i love doing. i put a pin on fixing the room when we moved in and gave myself time to "adjust." finally after a year, i got to doing that and i didn't realize how fun it actually is??? shopping for your bedroom????

all i've been doing to substitute my habit of 'eating when i'm bored' is reading the books i have that i haven't read. it also helps when i want to stay away from my phone.

deleted the twitter app and only getting on it when i turn my laptop on is such an experience for me.

whenever i feel the urge of self destruction, i write it all down. i still have the craving to ruin one's self. but once you start writing everything down, you kinda get lost in it and it sorta helps. it keeps your emotions in order. makes you know where to start.

really, just shadow work everyday when i can.

selling clothes i know i won't use again just to earn money to spend and not to save because everything i earn from work, i want to save.

been trying to book an appointment at the dfa to get my passport renewed before it expires this year but it feels IMPOSSIBLE to book on the website. already panicking about govt ids. i decided i need more than 2.

you know that phase you go through as a teenager when you're just pissed off and easily annoyed at everything? i never went through that. i'm going through that right now.

recently just got regularized in the company i work in!! i can BREATHE now. FUCK. this is the first job i actually did not half ass cause i truly wanted to keep this one. so im super happy about this

finished 2 books in a week. that's A LOT FOR ME considering my attention span.

i'm still taking melatonin to sleep unfortunately. one habit from my anxiety ridden year that i can't seem to get rid of. i've been taking melatonin every night since october 2020. i try to not be so dependent but i think we are way past that. the good thing about this is that i don't wake up groggy when i have to log in for work. i wake up like 15 minutes before my shift.

i have nothing else to share

[tarantulas4davey]

Can I ask about the alternative face reveal hcs? I know Tumblr screwed you over the last time but if you still would like to share, I’d still be interested!

i’ve been having a day but this i can do !! one batch of anxious albert coming right up 🛎

prepare to feel race’s unending rage right along with him cause it’s very justified

so chances are someone recognized race from a distance

definitely didn’t approach him or albert would’ve put his sunglasses on and ducked away to hide cause he’s a dork

the boys were probably being cute and couple-y and this person was like “hey that’s race! so that must be red” cause,,,,, 1+1 is 2, yk

and because he has no idea anyone’s recognized him, let alone has a camera on him, you can totally see albert’s face in the pictures this person took

and they post it EVERYWHERE

(this person is definitely not a fan cause idc if they’re fictional there will be no race and red stan slander in this house, they’re perfect)

albert’s face connected to his handle is all over every social media - hell, there’s even articles written about it - by dinner time

which is, of course, when they first see it

well

race does, but albert can immediately tell something is up cause race looks beyond furious and in serious danger of pitching his phone as hard as he can into a wall or something

so albert, as one does, asks him what’s wrong, and gets up to see what’s making race so angry

albert grabs the phone from his hand (to save it, of course) and time seems to just stop

cause he’s looking at,,,, well him, on the screen, posted publically for everyone to see

to put it kindly, panic is setting in

his chest is burning, and somewhere in the back of his mind he registers he should probably breathe, but he can’t cause feels like a vice is slowly closing around his rib cage and no matter how hard he tries he can’t get a breath in

he can feel the lump in his throat rise and his eyes fill but he tries to push the tears down cause this can’t be happening there’s nothing to panic about cause thatphotocantbefuckingrealohmygod

he feels race stand up next to him and put his hands on albert’s shoulders trying to coax him into breathing, but it’s like he’s watching it happen to someone else

race finally reaches down and places albert hand against his chest just over his heart, exaggerating his breathing and asking albert to mimic him

it takes a moment, but the thump of race’s heart under his hand grounds him enough to let him drag an uneven breath in, then another and another

his chest stops burning and he can actually hear the hushed but comforting words race is babbling out in a rush cause he’s always terrified when albert panics like this

race, still clutching albert’s hand to his chest like he needs it as much as albert does, grabs albert’s phone out of his pocket

race’s voice is still soft when he asks if albert is ok, and although he still looks vaguely disbelieving when al nods his head numbly, he presses a kiss to albert’s cheek and sends him off towards their room

he takes all of 10 minutes to issue a tweet from the chaotic red twitter saying “in light of the recent total invasion of privacy, red will be offline for a bit. i hope all of you understand. message me if you have any questions. -race”

the tweet from his own twitter is,,,,,,, much less tame (not to mention the instagram story live where he explains everything and also rants a bit more)

it’s an 8 post thread of pure rage-fueled ranting, and every word of it is justified

race also manages to get the original posts taken down, but by then it’s spread like wildfire and been saved and screenshot and reposted a thousand times over and it’s really no use anyway

when he walks back into their bedroom, albert is sitting up, still in his regular clothes, staring blankly at the wall

race coaxes him into pajamas and just,,,, holds him? there’s not much he can do other than just be there (which race hates, btw. he likes to be able to solve problems, and it upsets him he can’t solve this one, especially cause albert is hurting because of it.)

albert is completely offline for over a month and a half. he deleted all the apps off his phone the next morning.

it’s a random tuesday when he decides to redownload twitter and see what’s going on. the level of support STILL happening over on twitter for him makes him genuinely smile, and he replies to a few of the nicest or funniest ones

he basically tells everyone “i’m not officially back yet, but i’m not completely gone anymore. streams and videos, will take a bit of time, but i’ll be around :)”

fans are,,,, enthusiastically excited, to put it mildly

they loose their fuckin minds

(the simps have already doubled and he’s already read at least 50 tweets about how “hot” he is. he doesn’t know what to do with that, honestly)

he mostly just starts cropping up in race’s videos little by little

and then he starts streaming on twitch, just to test the waters

then he releases the same video he releases in the original face reveal (albeit with a bit more anxiety and a lot more general vibes of race yelling not to invade their privacy like that again from behind the camera)

then the face cams and cute twitch moments start

and it takes longer for him to be,,,,, ok? and comfortable? in front of the camera, but the dynamic settles in pretty quickly and we get our happy boi back :,)

so,,,,, i did it! not a super big fan of it and i still prefer the official version i posted BUT it was really fun and i hope you like it :))

also, angst is NOT my strong suit so i hope it’s not too terrible, i did my best ✨

thank you for the idea lovely <33

[twopoppies]

hi Gina. in relation to the anon who’s been feeling anxious, i kinda relate but for me is more like an unhealthy obsession. i can distance myself quite well from the drama/toxicity that exists sometimes - not on twitter tho, i had to delete the app because in there is just... too. much. but in here it’s easy since there’s not too much to handle and everyone’s much more mature minded. i do feel like my life evolves around louis and harry a lot tho, and that shouldn’t frustrate me as much as it does. it’s a feeling that never goes away, even when i’m not thinking about them, i am thinking about them... if that makes sense. they’re literally my comfort. i find myself wanting my day to end just so i can sit on my bed watching old interviews or videos or read fanfiction. and it feels like a guilty pleasure... because it’s a weird habit and i feel guilty about it :(

Hi darling. I don’t know that you need to feel guilty about it, and it doesn’t sound like a “weird” habit. Besides, we all do quirky things. It’s normal to be weird. LOL. 

I know that HL and aspects of fandom are a great comfort to many people. I think that’s wonderful. It sounds as though you’re having difficulty limiting how much time you spend her, and maybe are having a hard time doing other things with your free time. As I said to the other anon, I honestly think taking mental health breaks is important, and useful. 

Maybe give some thought as to what you get out of fandom, and see if you can give that to yourself in other ways. I think putting yourself first is needed––ultimately, you want your life to revolve around you, not an obsession with what’s going on in the lives of a pair of celebrities. You know? 

Anyway, just take care of yourself. Fandom will still be here. HL will still be here. But you’ll have shown yourself that you don’t need this to have a happy day. ❤️

[blueeyedgeorgie]

Controlling My Friend’s Phone-A.E

“ can u write either Alex or Will's gf going on Callux's channel to take part with the "controlling my best friend's phone for an hour" series, and he totally messes with her, but at the end it turns out he finds cute messages between them or smthing?“

Pairing: ImAllexx x Reader

Word Count: 1.7K+

______________

"Y/n, Welcome to the channel," Callum had smiled into the camera. "What's up?" Y/n grinned, giving a wave to the camera. "Not much, besides the fact I'll be controlling your phone for the next hour," Callum looked over to his friend, outreaching a hand, motioning for her to hand over her belonging. "I'm scared," Y/n shook her head, hesitantly pulling out her phone. "Oh, you should be," He smirked, snatching the phone from her. "Alright, time to unlock your phone." "Oh god..." Y/n trailed off, beginning to press in her password. The screen unlocked, revealing all of Y/n's apps. "Twitter time first!" Callum pressed open the blue bird app. "Don't post anything that could put me in a scandal, please," Y/n began to bite at her nails. "Like?" "Nothing, homophobic, trans-phobic, racist, or offensive," Y/n shook her head. "Wow, the bar is so low," Callum let out a laugh. He began to type up a tweet. "Boys, come slide in my DMS. I'm bored." "No! Are you fucking kidding me?" Y/n practically howled, "I'm dating someone!" "Oh, so I shouldn't put the kissy-face?" Callum laughed, being to open the emoji keyboard. "Why did I agree to this?" Y/n shook her head. "I'm putting a kissy face," Callum had pressed the 'post' button, sending the tweet out into the world. "Goddamnit, Callum," Y/n shook her head. "Alright, Instagram time," Callum smirked. "I promise I won't leak your nudes." "Wow," Y/n shook her head, looking at the camera. "Guys, I promise I don't have nudes, I'm not a whore." "Let's put something on your story," Callum smirked, swiping to the left to open the camera. "I'm thinking along the lines of... 'Guess what's coming in nine months?' With maybe a few baby emojis." "Oh god," Y/n shook her head. "I am gonna get into some type of scandal, aren't I?" "Probably," Callum laughed with a nod as he hit the 'post' button again. "What else should we do?" "Up to you, I guess," Y/n bit her lip, watching Callum scroll through her apps. "I'm positive you have George Memeulous's phone number," Callum grinned. "What are you planning?" Y/n raised a brow. "Let's start thirst texting him, why don't we?"  Callum had opened up Y/n's text messages. "Oh, no!" Y/n practically shouted. She got up, walking out of the camera frame. "You're really trying to get me canceled, aren't you?" "Alright, I'm gonna text him," Callum laughed, opening her texts between her and George. "Holy shit, your guys' conversations have been so dry." Callum scrolled through their texts, "Seriously? 'Hey, do you want some food, I'm gonna order some dinner.' You guys are so boring." "You're really going to ruin my friendships, aren't you?" Y/n shook her head as she walked back into the camera frame. "Anyways, time to text him. 'Hey Papi, whatcha up to?' Omgod, this is gonna be fun," Callum let out another laugh. "He's gonna know something's up," Y/n shook her head. "While we wait for him to reply, let's text up the other boys," Callum had pulled up Y/n's texts with Will next. "Lemme think... 'You're so fuckin hot, ditch Mia for me, baby.' I love this so much," Callum smiled, beginning to text Will. "Oh, no! Mia and I are so close! I'm not gonna have any friends after this," Y/n brushed a hand through her hair as she let out a long sigh. "James's turn next!" Callum smirked, "I'm gonna say... 'Can you do me a favor and lemme peg you?' You're gonna have to apologize to everyone after this, Y/n," Callum shook his head. "This hurts me. You've hurt me. How could you do this to me?" Y/n cringed. "You had a week to tell your friends something weird was gonna happen on your texts and social medias," Callum looked over to Y/n. "I'm gonna need bleach after this," Y/n sighed. Y/n's phone buzzed. "Oh, George texted us back!" Callum grinned, reopening Y/n's texts with George. " 'Y/n, are you alright?' Oh, he already knows something's up," Callum shook his head. "I told you he was gonna know something was going on," Y/n bit her lip. "I can fix this. 'I'm okay, but I'd be better if we were together at the moment." Callum smiled, continuing to text the commentary YouTuber. "Let's see, James left you on read!" "I'm not surprised. I'm friends with his girlfriend, I feel horrible," Y/n hid her face in her hands. "We're not gonna poke the bear with James because you're already getting into enough trouble," Callum smiled. "Will still hasn't opened your text yet." "I'm scared," Y/n returned to biting at her nails. "You should be," Callum looked over to her again. "Let's open Twitter again." There had been plenty of DMs sent to Y/n on Twitter with a lot of confused replies to her tweet. "This is absolutely amazing," Callum scrolled through the replies. "I'm gonna tweet something new." "I'm gonna get so fucking canceled," Y/n sighed. "Alright, I'm gonna say... '5 likes and I'll burn ImAllexx's Internet Sensation merch," Callum was already typing. "No, not Alex! You've already done so much, why Alex?" Y/n was freaking out at this point. She was surprised Alex hadn't tried reaching out to her yet over what she was posting and texting to his friends. James should've told him what Y/n texted him by now. As expected, Y/n's phone began to buzz again. Only this time she was being called by her boyfriend, Alex Elmslie.  "No!" Y/n yelled, grabbing onto the roots of her hair, "he knows something's wrong!" "Y/n, I'm gonna pick up. You can't talk though," Callum smirked. "Are you crazy?!" "Hey, I'm controlling your phone for the next thirty minutes," Callum grinned, hitting the green pickup button. "Y/n, are you alright? I'm so confused over your tweets, is this some kind of joke? James also told me you sent a sext to him? What the fuck? Do you have something to tell me? Do you wanna break up?" The more Alex spoke, the more Y/n's heart broke. Alex suffered from anxiety, so she could only imagine how he was feeling right now. Y/n bit her lip, making eye contact with Callum, he only put a finger to his lips, motioning for her to stay quiet. "Y/n, are you there-" Alex had been cut off by Callum hitting the 'end call' button. "That was so mean! He probably thinks I'm cheating on him or something!" Y/n brushed a hand through her hair. Within seconds, Y/n's phone buzzed again. This time she had received a text. It was from Alex. 'Y/n, please talk to me, I know you're there.' "I'm going to end up getting dumped by Alex by the time this is over," Y/n shook her head. "I'm texting back. 'What are you talking about? I am completely normal.' But in all caps," Callum laughed, already typing. "You're so mean!" Y/n's eyes widened. "As Alex texts back, let's look back through your texts with him," Callum smiled, beginning to scroll up. "Oh god, you two really are an adorable pair." Thank you, I guess? I mean, I don't know if we're gonna last after this video," Y/n gave a shrug as she watched Callum. "You two were literally planning a Star Wars movie marathon tonight, now I'm starting to feel shitty," Callum let out a sigh. "Honestly you two seem like such a power couple with these texts." "Thank you, can I have my phone now?" Y/n put out her hand, motioned she wanted her phone back. "I have 15 more minutes left. Now let's look at your photos!" Callum hadn't found anything special. Most photos where just screenshots of random stuff, but finally he found a photo album he really liked. "You have a photo album titled, 'Alex' with a  heart emoji?" Callum grinned, already opening the album. "Oh yeah," Y/n gave a nod, smiling at the tens of photos she had of Alex. There were a decent amount of photos Y/n had taken of Alex. Some of them were funny, most of them were pretty cute. There was a photo of Alex downtown. They had been walking downtown after seeing a movie. As they were waiting to cross the street, Y/n had stolen photo of Alex smiling at her, cars were driving past in the background as the sun was halfway down. There was another photo of Alex, Y/n's hand was placed underneath his chin, squeezing his cheeks together, causing his lips to squish together. Photo after photo, each one had a special memory, it didn't matter if the memory was big or small, they were all important to Y/n. Even though she and Alex had just started dating only a few months back, there were plenty of good memories they shared. Finally, Callum finished gushing over photos, talking about how he thought Y/n and Alex were 'couple goals'. "I guess I can give you your phone back now," Callum gave a shrug as he handed Y/n's phone back to her. "I've got to go and do damage control now," Y/n sighed, already opening Twitter to delete the tweets Callum posted. "Good luck with that," Callum smiled. Callum began the outro as Y/n was texted her friends her apologies. She felt bad that Cal had texted weird shit to her friend's. 'Hey, Alex. I'm sorry about everything. I was filming a video on Callux's channel where he stole my phone for the past hour, none of that was me, I promise. I love you too much to be like that.' Within seconds, Alex had begun to type back. 'It's alright, Y/n. I'm just happy none of that was you. I love you too. Are we still on for a movie marathon tonight?' Y/n smiled at the text she received. Thank god Alex wasn't gonna hold this against her. 'Of course, I'll call you when I get in my car.' 'Okay.' Y/n placed her phone in her back pocket as Callum finished up his outro for the video. "And if you're curious where you can find Y/n, I'll be leaving a link in the description to her YouTube channel," he smiled to the camera. Y/n gave a wave, a smile appeared on her face. "This video made me anxious for an hour," Y/n spoke up. "Anyways, I'll see you guys next time!" With that, the camera was turned off.

Taglist:

@daddydobrock​

@anyasthoughts​

@multifandom-but​

[angelmichelangelo]

I get that feeling all the time. my relationship with the internet has changed since the start of the year and I fell out with a lot of people because of that, but I think it was a change for the better. I feel less anxious coming on here now because I'm not trying to impress anyone or cater to a specific person, I'm just being me. I know I'm still appreciated here even if I don't really have many friends here anymore, and that's okay. I still very much enjoy the community and supoorting all the content creators here without feeling pressure to make friends or be in a certain group of people, which also has to do with the vibe of tumblr phandom (for me) changing to be less cliquey? if that makes any sense? anyway sorry for rambling I hope you're doing okay ♡

oh god i get this 100% !! it’s one of the main reasons why i left twitter because sometimes it just feels like everyone around you has these big groups of friends and you’re just awkwardly walking around, holding up your posts hoping that maybe one of them will look and care 😅 which might come from some anxiety about high school because that’s exactly how i felt there like all the time lmao

and im gonna be really honest, since i left tumblr and came back, there’s people that haven’t spoken to me. people that stopped interacting with me and yknow what it’s fine because there are people here i do talk to still, it’s just a lot less. and i need to learn how to stop caring about those people, and care about me instead. because i come on here for my own fun (and for people like you, of course lol) and curating your own internet experience is so fucking important because a few months back when i was just. doing stuff for other people - people actually didn’t give a shit in the end lol - it really messed up my mental health, and it’s not worth it when i can easily delete the app and not get myself involved, yknow

but it’s nice, having this smaller circle. because i have friends like you! and that’s all i need to have a good time, but sadly my stupid ass brain just needs to be reminded of that sometimes. i’m someone who craves validation, i’m not gonna pretend i’m not, it’s just who i am, and when someone starts edging away from me, or suddenly decides they don’t like me after all, it hurts, because i put a lot of effort into being liked. which, idk, some people might think that’s sort of pathetic, but it’s just who i am, and something i definitely need to work on.

[purplesurveys]

1157

survey by hxcsingingsk8r

Phone Scavenger Hunt

First off, what phone do you have? I have an iPhone 8.

And what provider do you use? It’s a local one you wouldn’t know about, called Globe.

How long have you had your current phone? I can’t remember if it would be 3 or 4 years this 2021. Either way, it’s definitely been a while and I’ve been itching to upgrade. It’s too early to make such a big purchase, though.

Do you have any cases for it? Describe them. I have a clear case that I bought last year. Before that, I had a pink Otterbox case that I managed to destroy even though Otterbox is normally known for its durability. I just have a very unique ability to wreck everything I’ve ever owned lol.

How old were you when you got your first cellphone? I was technically 6, but it was meant to be a present for my 7th birthday. We threw a birthday party a month in advance because my dad had to fly back abroad for work before my actual birthday, but we wanted him to be present at the celebration so we decided throwing a party early was the best route.

What about your first smartphone? [If the answer is different] It was an iPhone 5S.

How old are you now? Dunno what this has to do with the theme of the survey but I am now 22.

Okay, move onto the scavenger hunt part

What is your lock screen picture of? It’s of Kim Seon Ho at a restaurant, lmao.

Home screen? It’s one of the shots from a recent promotional photoshoot Hayley did for Good Dye Young.

How many pictures are thre currently on your phone? This question just made me so anxious hahaha. I have way too many photos; and upon checking, it turns out I currently have 6,266. My god do I need to clean up my camera roll this weekend.

How many videos? I have 227. I have no idea it’s gotten to be this many; I barely use my phone to take videos. I’ll go ahead and delete some of them right now, just to give my phone (and its storage) space to breathe.

What is your most recent picture of? It’s a work thing...I guess I’ll explain it so it can make more sense. So one of our clients has got this Lent campaign going on, and to spread word about it we’ve tapped a handful of food bloggers to try out the offers themselves and post about their experience on social media. Now that we’re in the middle of Holy Week they’ve gone ahead and uploaded their own posts, and I’m in charge of taking screenshots so I can show to the client that the execution had been successful.

And the most recent video? It’s a private vlog. Every Sunday, or at least every other Sunday I take a few minutes to sit down and do a weekly video thing where I talk about my ~mental~ and ~emotional~ status, and it’s basically a way to be in touch with myself and keep track of my progress. Who knows, maybe I’ll actually get to uploading them one day.

Do you have any albums? If so, of what? Yeah. I have one for Cooper, one for Kimi, and a bunch of tiny albums I’ve made where I compiled 4–5 photos of friends to post on their birthdays.

What pictures have you favorited? I have a lot of favorited photos. There’s no required category for me to label them as such.

Do you have any shared albums with friends or family or work? No. I’m not sure if I can do that, or how to do it if it is allowed.

Do you have any alarms set? For what time and for what occasions? I have a bunch of alarms but only because they’re archived into the Clock app and I just haven’t gotten around to deleting them. When I was still new at my work, I used to have alarms set for certain work tasks I have to take note of every week – but now that I’ve gotten into the groove of things, I don’t need the alarms to be reminded about them anymore.

Check your weather app, what is the weather and temperature where you live? It says ‘Mostly Clear’ and shows a temperature of 26ºC.

Do you have the YouTube app? Do you have your own channel? I do have the app and my own account, but I never use it to post videos. It’s nice to have my own channel so that my homepage can be tailored to my interests.

Do you have an email app? Which one do you use? I just have the default Email app that comes with iOS, but I never use it because it’s so wonky. It doesn’t refresh new emails and it takes forever when it does, and it doesn’t always show the full thread of email conversations. If I absolutely need to check my email for something I usually have to pull out my laptop.

Does it say that there is an update available on your phone or any apps? Yes, it reminds me everyday hahaha. I don’t update unless Apple has been planning a big revamp with new features, though; and if the updates are just to address bugs, I disregard the reminders.

Go into your contacts, how many contacts do you have total? It says I have 178.

Name all of your contacts under the letter M: Feels a tad bit invasive, so I’ll just name five people I have under M: Lui, Kim, Patrice, Danika, and Andi.

Name all of your contacts under the letter U: I don’t have anyone under U.

Do you have any contacts that are businesses rather than people? Which ones? No, I don’t really use text to contact businesses. If I wanted to inquire or order from one, I usually head to their social media page.

Go into your notes, how many notes do you have saved? This is another one I have a hoarding problem with lol. My phone says I currently have 561 notes, though I’m fairly certain the biggest chunk of it comes from minutes I’ve taken down from work meetings. It was a whole lot less when I was still in school.

What kinds of things do you save in your notes? Like I said, I use Notes for taking down minutes from meetings. There are also a few surveys on there, from times I didn’t have internet and couldn’t post them on here.

Do you have any voice memos saved? What of? Yep. Some of them were recordings I had to do for journalism classes I was assigned to do voiceovers; some are interviews, also from my journ class; and the rest are of me rambling.

Do you ever use the calculator app? Pretty frequently for work.

Do you ever use the Maps app? Not really. If I needed directions, I would check out Waze for that.

Do you have any health/fitness apps? Which ones? I still have the Nike Training app from the very brief time I wanted to start working out earlier this year.

Do you have the Instacart app? The what now? I’ve never even heard of that.

What about a delivery service like Postmates, Uber Eats, Grubhub, Doordash? I have the McDelivery app for McDonald’s, but I also have other general delivery apps like Grab, Lalamove, and Transportify.

Do you have something like Venmo, Cashapp, or Paypal? I have the Paypal app but I never use it. I also have a couple of e-wallet apps just in case I’d have to use them as a payment method, since some businesses  I purchase from prefer certain ones. Ultimately, though, I use Grab’s mobile wallet the most often.

Do you use Bitmoji? I think I did before? I never used it all that regularly though. Didn’t see the point.

What other keyboards do you use besides English? Any? Filipino, Korean, and Emoji.

Which social media network apps do you have? Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Tumblr, TikTok, and Snapchat. So I guess I have all the main ones?

If you have Instagram, what is your handle and how many followers? I have a very private one I only use for work. I didn’t want it to have any followers but at present there’s Angela (because she asked to follow it this week) and Bea (idk why).

What do you typically post on the various social media platforms? The only ones I regularly post on are Twitter and Facebook, and on either I share life updates (if there are any) and memes; though on Facebook I have to watch out what kind of memes I share and make sure they aren’t too offensive because I’m friends with relatives, workmates, and media on there lmao. But on Twitter, I basically have no filter.

Do you make TikTok videos? I don’t make any myself, but I do enjoy going through the app.

Do you only add people you know on Facebook? Yes, for the most part. I’ve taken to adding people as long as they’re from UP or my high school even though I’ve never met them as well, but if I sense that they only added me to try and sell me insurance OR try to get me into MLM, then it’s an instant unfriend for me.

Do you have an app that tracks Instagram followers? No, because I don’t need to track my Instagram followers. I’m off the radar as off the radar gets.

Do you have a Snapchat? Yeah, it’s still on my phone just because but I literally never touch it anymore.

Do you ever take selfies with filters? What app's filters do you use? Eh, just before. I don’t really take selfies anymore, period.

Do you use any apps like Depop or Poshmark or Etsy? No. Out of these three I’ve only ever heard of Etsy, too.

What messengers do you use to talk to people? Any besides just texting? I have Messenger to stay in touch with family and friends; Whatsapp and Viber for work; and Telegram just in case my friends want to play games.

Do you have any photo editing apps? Which ones? I have this app called Foodie that has some pretty filters. Otherwise, since I’m not on Instagram anyway I’m never on the lookout for photo editing apps; no one ever filters their photos on Facebook and Twitter lol.

Do you have any games? Which ones? I do have a ton of games on my phone. I never play any of them, but I keep them just in case I get bored enough to start revisiting them. I have word games, drinking games, games similar to Heads Up! where one person will have to guess the word on the screen while the phone is on their forehead, and gimmicky games like 1010! and Candy Crush haha.

Do you have any rideshare apps like Lyft or Uber? I have Grab, which is a rideshare, parcel delivery, food delivery, and online grocery app all in one.

Now go to the actual phone app, whose phone numbers are saved as favorites? I don’t tag any of my contacts as favorites.

Who was your most recent outgoing call to? I can’t recognize the number, so it was probably a Transportify driver that I called to give him directions to my house.

Who was your most recent incoming call from? I also can’t recognize the number, but this time he was most likely a Grab driver.

Who was your most recent missed call from? Again, can’t recognize the number HAHAA

Why did you miss that call? On purpose? Were you sleeping? Busy? My phone is on silent 24/7, so I must have missed it while I was working.

Who is your most recent voicemail from and what's it regarding? We don’t have voicemail in the Philippines.

What was the last thing you Googled or searched on your phone? Candle tunneling and how to fix it.

What music app do you use? Apple Music? Spotify? Something else? I use Spotify, but I also availed of a 3-month trial on Apple Music earlier this year just because. I think it’s supposed to end soon but I have no plans to shift.

What playlists have you made on there? I have playlists called, “robyn discovers kpop,” “winding down,” “angst,” “not my loss,” and my personal favorite, “paramore but fuck you.”

Lastly, what is the most recent song/album you've added to your collection? What Type of X - Jessi.

[muffindaddy]

Personal rant, feel free to scroll past

I always thought I was just bad at being on social media. I was always scared and anxious about posting things. During quarantine I told myself to delete social media apps that were stressing me out, and I'm just realizing that the ones I deleted all had connected me to my family.

I love my family, they are good people, but I've just never felt connected enough to be myself with them. I'm learning that the person that I am will never be good enough for them, and I'll always be disconnected from them in some way.

Ive posted hundreds of memes on Tumblr and twitter knowing they'll be seen by my friends and moots but I posted one thing about BLM on Facebook and I cried because I was so scared what they would think of me.

I want to be open and me about everything but there's this constant pressure to not do that and I've been blaming myself for creating that pressure, but with knowing that I'm not comfortable around my family specifically, maybe it's not my fault.

Idk I just want to leave, hopefully it'll be better once I find my tribe in the world, wherever they are.

TDLR: being open around my family makes me really fucking anxious, especially on social media, and I can't wait to leave my hometown.

[irwinkitten]

As a fellow at risk person, I wholeheartedly agree with your post and the info you have reblogged and thank you for doing it. Can we also spread the word to people that since this is such an anxiety triggering topic for some, it would be helpful if we all tagged our posts on the subject for filtering purposes? I've already deleted Twitter and Facebook off my phone and Tumblr is my go to "take my mind off things" app but it's been harder to do that over the past few days

This is just it. I didn’t realise it was triggering my own anxiety when it came up in conversations to the point that I could feel the panic but could do nothing because it was directly involved if that makes sense? So I know I’m doing the best I can to keep myself safe and hopefully prevent spreading anything else but to see the numbers steadily climb it’s been making me anxious and stressed especially as I’m in a place which is popular for tourists from the most affected countries.

I’ll be tagging future posts with “covoid19” so blacklist it if you do not want to see it but also I’ll be tagging it as coronavirus too. I hope you can enjoy your blogging once more my friend ❤️