Back on my: Holotuber Jedi Youngling - OC Thoughts >.>
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You think folks debate at first? Shtick or Real Thing? Like? No... no WAY could that be one of those Mysterious Mystic Space Cult Kids. No WAY. They would NEVER let their kid be unsupervised on the Net.
But like... (and since I'm a She, gonna use She, but realistically could be any pronouns here) she LOOKS like she's recording from a...? Is that a closet? This one looks like a vent. THIS video is definitely some sort of maintenance area. So she's definitely sneaking...
Ooooh! Thaaaat's a Jedi! REAL FUCKING JEDI. Just dropped down silently behind her. Arms crossed. Mouse droids be snitching. BUSTED.
:T
"Uuuuuuh, h-heeey, Master Uvalii. Fancy seeing YOU here!"
"Yes. Quite interesting isn't it? Since you should not be able to access this area at all, much less to achieve holonet access. Of which we are both aware you are expressly Forbidden To DO unsupervised."
".........I can explain?"
"Please. Do."
*feed ends, chat goes fucking NUTS*
Like? Oh SHIT. Baby Jedi in troooouble. But also? Oh no! What's gonna happen?! Are they gonna be okay?! S-should they TELL somebody? What do Jedi do to kids who disobey them? Does anyone actually KNOW? What DO any of us know about them!? Someone find their Com Code! MA! MA, I need you to yell at space monks! An adorable CHILD MIGHT BE AT STAKE!!! D:>
Even coming BACK on? For a supervised feed? Going "no, I'm just in trouble. Have to right paragraphs and meditate on 'why I felt the need to do this' (even though I KNOW why, not that they'll LISTEN. They just hope I'll meditate until I come to an answer they LIKE)" under the offscreen supervision of a teacher or Creche master?
Whole ass Net gonna be like "youngling! Blink Twice if they're holding you hostage! We can afford bounty hunters! We got a group pot thing going already!!! Aaaaaaaa-!"
Like? *waves at the camera and chat* she TOLD you. They don't believe you. This is part of WHY she wants to do what she's doing. Palpatine's and his Master's machinations have been building for a while. Eroding trust. The Jedi have become strange, dangerous, semi-mythical cryptids with magic powers we must HOPE are benevolent.
Not people.
Why would they expect some unfeeling, magical, sword-wielding space legend to be patient or kind to children? To even have the capacity? We are said to kidnap children and be unfeeling. Can not reach enough people to show otherwise. To reveal the mundanity of our lives. The traditions. The norms.
Food, children, laughter.
The Common Good.
And like? She obviously isn't gonna name Sith-ly NAMES. Not on CAMERA. But her lil "why I wanna play the tooka game and chat about lunch" speech? Convincing. Calms chat down. Still in trouble, mind you. But... provided it's SUPERVISED? And they work out some sort of effective moderation? Alright.
It's a matter of SAFETY, youngling. And no matter HOW much good you wish to do? They will NOT be sacrificing children to achieve it. That is NOT the Jedi way. There are plenty of old masters who would live nothing more then to ramble all day into cameras, if only to here themselves talk. (Oh? Good to know. Guest speakers pog?)
Like? Imagine making a game. Have a "mystical sage" character you TOTALLY BASED of Jedi in it. And your feed gets? Flooded with XD reactions in response to some smol bby streamer playing it? You go to check it out. Cause you're kinda a big deal on your planet. And?
Oh No™
That tiny streamer? Is a tiny JEDI streamer. Who is sitting there, in the stills, going O.o like "Wut." And the next still? Her lil friends are pulled in. The next? A teenager. The NEXT. An adult. The one after THAT. A few adults looking over her shoulder. Then a CROWD. All deeply, deeply confused looking.
The comments are DYING. Howling with laughter. The Jedi were so earnest. Trying to identify which Era you must be referencing. Which sect. But the head dress... cultural, maybe? It doesn't fit with the features though. Could be adopted. A hint at, I believe the term was, "lore"? No, no, those are DEFINITELY padawan beads! But so MANY? In THAT order?
They aren't even connected to a braid! And he's supposed to be a Master, right? But, wait. Perhaps it's meant to suggest he is a Padawan of the Force itself? A student of life? No, that wouldn't make sense! Stolen? It could suggest he has TAKEN the beads? Is regurgitating stolen texts without true understanding? Much like wearing bead he did not EARN?
They keep going and going. Ripping your character design to SHREDS. Picking it apart. Not even meanly! They are genuinely confused. AND IT ONLY MAKES THE CHAT LAUGH HARDER. Because it devolves into a MARATHON, after the game has been paused, of chat spamming different character names? For the Jedi to go "???" Over.
T...that's not? What? How does he even EAT in those robes? And those ones don't seem very non-humanoid friendly. Is he FLOATING HIS SWORD WITH THE FORCE? WHY!? Just keep it on your belt!!!
And? Now every game developer in the galaxy is PARANOID AF. Either make their mystics Very Obviously NOT Jedi rip offs... or shoot a "if I pay you $20 will you consult on something real quick" email. It's just... just easier man. Last guy got laughed into oblivion. Oof.
They can bill it as "Realism" or something. See guys? WE do or reasearch! Give us your credits!
Oh YEAH? Says the growing fan base of this Funky Lil Monk Child. Then put you game where your communication organs are. Send her the game, you cowards.
Do It.
Cut to "oh no, guys! The sorta-jedi died! What? Next objective? No. No we gotta give him a funeral! Oh good, we ca-BURY HIM?! What!? No!!! I could understand if he was from a race that held beliefs that bodies must be returned to the soil from whence they came, but this guy is a SORTA-JEDI! Absolutely NOT!"
"Let's cut down some trees. WE are building him a PYRE. Never ran one of these, but I can look it up. Gimme a moment. Okay. Draaaaag, him on to it. Where's his weapon. There! Thanks chat! On it goes too. Okay. Looking it up..... got it. Ahem...!"
*hold funeral for the sage character by burning his body*
*mods are IMMEDIATELY created to change the "burial" scene to a "Funeral pyre" with somber music*
Just? I can not let go? Of how the subtle shift would spread? Not in shining senatorial halls, but in class rooms and living rooms, dingy pubs and long hyperdrive flights? Anywhere boredom might be found and "hey check this out" might spread? Where someone else, might overhear and get curious?
Lik?? Imagine being the bounty hunter, who fuckin HATES Jedi, thinks they're sanctimonious BASTARDS, hearing someone snort laugh. Just... just fucking CHOKE on their cheep beer. Oh? Now everyone's interested. What's funny?
It's a teeny, tiny, lil jedi youngling. Playing that new Bounty 5 game. Unrealistic as hell. But they are going "I am a MASTER of stealth. A LEGEND of the hunt. You will not see me. I am sneaky. So, so, sneeeeakyyyyy!" As they concentrate on sneaking through back alleys.
Only for their character to fall RIGHT of a ledge, bounce against three buildings, smash into a parked Speeder, and roll right into a cut scene. Where they are call the "greatest bounty hunter of all time".
They look so incredulous.
"Are you SURE? Cause I'm fairly certain that phrase alone is banned for the trouble it causes, near most Bounty outposts. Could be the concussion talking though!"
They are? A sarcastic lil SHIT. Roast EVERYTHING. Know a surprising number of them. Given that they gave the Duros support character a modded in hat. Named him Definitely-Not-Cad. The fake look mustache REALLY sells it. Yeah, Bane. Clearly not you. YOU don't have a mustaches. *watches as she unleashes the Not Cad Bane like a highly tactical meat thresher on legs* brutal lil shit. They like her.
Granted, it's only BECAUSE it's not real she does so.
But I just? Have so many ideas? Spam the Galaxy with "this is who we are. We are people. Develop bonds with us. Care about us. KNOW us." Because the Sith can not possibly kill us all. Can not stop truth, so widely spread. Light dies, when you smother it in closed hands, hidden away in dark and long forgotten places. When you let fear dictate your actions.
It thrives in the open. With people. With the chance to SPREAD. Grow. Bloom.
It's about talking and caring. Being heard. What better place? Then on the screen in their pocket?
@babbling-babull @hypewinter @hdgnj @legitimatesatanspawn @spidori @spidori
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TW: vent
I hate not having any control over my own life. I hate not being allowed to choose what I wear, what I do, and what I control. I hate being told to do the dishes everytime the sink is full, I hate being the family therapist, I hate not being allowed to relax without being shamed for it.
I tell my sisters no to something that will make a mess if I don't watch them closely, then being forced to give it to them anyways by THEIR father and still have to clean up THEIR mess.
I hate having to do the dishes when their are other people in the house who can do it, then being told the way I do it is wrong.
I hate being threatened to have my hair ripped out of my skull if I don't do what I'm told.
I hate being told I look TOO good in something by my mother and then those pants or that shirt get taken from me and put in my moms drawer.
I hate being told that only skanks wear cropped tops and not to walk around in only a bra and some shorts when I'm hot because my dad (step-dad) is in the house, or he has friends over that he could bring them in, but my mom wears crop tops, and she walks around in the store, at other peoples houses and other PUBLIC places in just a bra.
^But when I walk around OUR house, I'm asking for it
I hate wanting my hair cut, and eventually getting to the point where I want to cut it myself, but I can't. Wanna know why? Cause I'll get my ass beat for doing something I've been BEGGING my mom to do for the past year or so.
i hate being told the hair cut I want is too short, or too boy like, or it doesn't match my face, that it'll make me look ugly.
I hate being expected to let my mother rant to me, but get scolded if I try talking about my feeling with her.
I hate telling my mom things I wanna do, then her tell me no and that I have to do something because she had to.
I hate being told not to let people see me cry, not to let people see me weak, not to let them think I'm weak, then being told I should cry more, and let my feelings out when my dog gets killed.
I hate having to fake my tears so that my mom thinks I'm alright.
I hate that every time I sit down I'm automatically not doing anything, that I'm always so lazy, that I don't do anything.
I hate being the one who has to talk myself out of panic attacks, then when I tell my mom, she just tells me not to let myself.
"Why are you putting yourself the panic attack? Why are you letting it beat you?" She says
But god forbid if one of my sisters start having a panic attack. And I get it, their 5 and 7, yes worry about them, but I'm 15, I want my mom to about me like that.
I hate feeling like I have to fight my feelings.
I hate wanting to be a man just so I can feel some kind of control, and I still don't feel like I can control anything.
I hate the way my step-father has made me hate men, but I still want their love.
I hate feeling like I need to fight for love.
I hate the empty "I love you"'s that come out of my mom, and stepdads mouths.
I hate the fact that I still love my mom, despite the things she's put me through.
I hate feeling like I'm never enough, like if I'm of no use to anyone, then why should they love or care about me?
I hate feeling like everyone expects so highly of me, and then are significantly disappointed when they actually get to know me.
I hate not feeling much of anything besides anxiety, fear, and anger.
I hate feeling smaller than everyone else.
I hate having to create different personas for every person I meet, just so I can be liked.
I hate not being allowed to be myself.
I hate feeling like crap everytime I'm not comfortable with doing something, because if I'm of no use to you, why should you care for/about me?
I hate not being able to focus on one project, and then feeling terrible because I never finished something.
I hate feeling sorry for others more than I do myself.
I hate not knowing when my next meal will be.
I hate being shamed for not eating because "we have plenty of food."
I hate having issues with certain textures of food, and having to go hungry because I don't like what my mom fixed.
I hate not liking certain tastes, then being forced to eat it, because I'm tired of starving myself.
I hate feeling like I'm bothering everyone else because of my feelings.
I hate feeling bad for snapping at my sisters, when they didn't even do anything wrong.
I hate being shamed for how little I eat, and how much I sleep.
I hate how I never get a break.
I hate getting shamed for taking a break.
I hate how my mom and step dad don't care about my hobbies unless it makes money that they can emotionally manipulate me into giving them.
I hate feeling like I can't trust anyone.
I hate losing weight, but still looking fat.
I hate wishing I had more things wrong with me, just so I feel like I have a reason to complain.
But most importantly...
I hate myself
And I'm sorry if you actually read all of this. You shouldn't have to listen to some stranger that you don't even truly know on the internet. Because you don't know me, no one knows me. They know a carefully designed version of me that was made just for them.
@puppet200 @purpleeggyboi @th3-r4t-48 @zeroisreallygood @im-a-simp898 @luciluck2046 @evry1h8s-me @aflairforthemelodramaticc @caretaleandotherstuff
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Red Line | CL - LH
WC: 5K
Charles Leclerc x reader, Lewis Hamilton x reader
Summery;(REQUESTED) You have had feelings for Charles for years, your best friend. When he fails to return your feelings and a new Ferrari driver joins the team, he shows you attention and care. It is less complicated.
Warning: angst?
AN: i debated who she should end up with, but he's my number 1 driver, and I'm WEAK for him.
Masterlist
Charles Masterlist
Lewis Masterlist
You have been working at Scuderia Ferrari since 2018, you started as an intern under the engineering team, you quickly became a permanent engineer for Charles in 2019 and have continued to develop and grow as the time went on. Maybe it's because you joined the same year Charles did, or it's because you were one of his first engineers when he started working for the red team, but the two of you have grown so close to each other. You consider Charles to be one of the closest people to you, during work hours and out of work hours. You see each other a lot even in the off-season. Charles values your opinion and cares a lot about it, he also considers you one of his close friends. Whenever you’re in the paddock you're always close by, he can depend on you. He prides himself in knowing you, he knows your coffee order, your favourite food, your dreams and hopes, he knows it all.
The moment Charles joined the team, you just clicked, your connection instant and so effortless. You both don't have to overthink it... at the start at least.
On long days, feeling the effect of the jetlag, when you'd almost drop from how tired you are, Charles always brings you coffee for a boost. On days where you're both in Maranello, he'd always offers you a ride back to the small house you have in Italy, he always insists that it's on his way but both of you know that it wasn't. He's always been patient and calm, and that made him a good listener. On plane rides when only the two of you are awake he'd just happily sit down and listen to you vent, his patience seemingly endless.
Even the fans picked up on the bond between the two of you, some speculating you're a couple. Thankfully it wasn't a big thing or it would have affected your job, but every now and then you both get those kinds of comments. And maybe you just had the smallest hopes that you were an actual couple, those feelings you have slowly ate at you every day. You were in love with Charles, the intensity of your feelings scared you. You can never tell him what you're feeling with the fear of ruining the perfect balance of your friendship. And even though he treats you in a way a partner would on a lot of occasions, he acts completely oblivious to it, as if everything he does with you he does for everyone else.
On a late evening, as you looked over the latest numbers and data, Charles came seemingly out of nowhere with two cups of coffee in hand.
"Long night, huh?" He said, offering you the coffee, you smiled, grateful for his gesture.
"Thanks." You take a sip and sigh in content. "You always know when I need the caffeine boost."
Charles leans on the desk beside you and grins. "It's the perk of knowing you so well, how are my numbers?"
"Not good." You tease him, Charles leans over to see what you're looking at. "They're saying you're too nice."
Charles laughs and rolls his eyes. "I'll try to be less nice then, maybe I'll start with you."
"Come on now, I was just joking." You pout at him and he smiles.
"How long until you finish up?" Charles asks and you hum.
"Not long, I'm just finishing up." You tell him, and he nods but doesn't move.
"Do you need a ride?" Charles asks, his eyes not straying from you. "I'm heading out."
"You're staying on the other side of town." You raise an eyebrow, those words you say to him every time.
"It's no trouble, besides it's an excuse to spend more time with my favourite person on the team." Your heart skips a beat at his words and you can't fight the smile.
"Alright, I'll take you up on that."
Those kinds of things your mind wanders to, especially on those sleepless nights while you're lying in bed. Your mind always goes back to the little moments that you shared, the moments that got your heart to flutter, the lingering glances, the causal touches, and the shared laughter. You cherish those moments, holding them close to you like precious and delicate Chinas. But there was always doubt. Did he actually feel the same way? Will he ever feel the same way? Or are you just destined to always be his friend?
Your thoughts all came to a halt when the room buzzed, by the new arrival. The room was alight with anticipation as Lewis Hamilton walked in, his presence commanding attention. His move to Ferrari is sensational, the talk of the paddock all of last year. The move turned F1 upside down. Lewis greeted everyone with a practised charm, a smile on his face, he wanted to seem genuine, he wanted to not come across as a big headed driver and just to get to know everyone he works with, to create a harmonious and smooth working place. Lewis met everyone's gaze as he greeted them, but when his eyes met yours, something shifted.
"Hey there." Lewis said, approaching you with a smile. "You must be the genius behind these impressive numbers."
You laughed, feeling slightly flustered. "I'm not too sure about the genius part, but I try my best. Welcome to Ferrari, Lewis."
"Thanks, it's great to be here." Lewis said and looked around the room before his eyes settled back on you. "I've heard a lot about you, mind if I pick your brain a bit?"
"Not at all, what do you want to know?"
And so you and Lewis stood talking for a bit, before he was whisked away to continue his tour and meet the rest of the workers. But as his presence became permanent in the factory you found yourself spending a lot of time with him. He often sought you out and at first it was just to understand all the data and how the new car will function and he had ideas that he wanted to see if it could be implemented or not. Your conversations flowed easily, from the team, to the car to your role it all went and flowed easily. And you found yourself thinking more about Lewis and looking forward to your time together.
Lewis had a knack of lightening the mood and making everything seem so effortless. It's a trait that you appreciate. It was refreshing.
One afternoon, you were reviewing data together. Lewis leaned over your shoulder, his proximity causing you to lose focus for a moment.
"So what's the secret sauce here?" He asked his tone playful, it was as if he had no idea what he was doing, as if his proximity was not having any effect on you.
"If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret then, would it?" You laughed, nudging him lightly.
"Fair point, but come on, give me something." Lewis smiled at vou. "I promise I won't tell anyone.”
"Alright, alright." You said after rolling your eyes, your smile showed that you're actually okay with it. "It's all in optimising the balance between speed and control, especially in the corners. We've been finetuning it for months."
"See, now I'm learning something, you really are the genius everyone says you are." You blushed and shrugged, brushing off the compliment.
"It's a team effort."
"Yeah, but each team has its MVP." He said and his eyes locked with yours for a moment longer than necessary.
One dqy, you were in the garage with Charles, adjusting some settings to his car, when Lewis came a playful grin on his face.
"Hey, engineer extraordinaire, got a moment?" Lewis asked, his eyes filled with mischief.
"What's up, Lewis?" You looked up at him already amused.
"I've got a serious question for you, it's about strategy." Lewis leaned next to you, his eyes going to Charles with the playful look on his face. Charles watched the interaction with intrigue, he of course noticed how close you and Lewis became, but he never actually saw you interact.
"Go on."
"Pineapple on pizza, yes or no?" This was not what you expected at all, Charles was even surprised, but where you laughed he did not.
"Really? That's your serious question?"
"Absolutely, it's crucial information." He said laughing along with you.
"Well, if you must know, I'm a pro-pineapple." You shrugged, throwing your hands up. "Controversial, I know."
"I knew I loved you for a reason, you've got good taste." Lewis winked at you before he patted Charles's shoulder and left you back to what you were doing.
"That's it?" You asked after the older driver.
"Yeah." With a wave of his hand over his shoulder he was out of sight. You shook your head and went back to what you were doing before he came in with a smile on your face.
"Huh." Charles mutters frowning, things are changing, and it's making him feel some type of way, he has no idea what to feel about it.
As your relationship grew and your banter continued, you found yourself looking forward to these light-hearted moments. Lewis had a way of making the most mundane topics entertaining. He was effortlessly funny, and his humour was a refreshing change from the intense atmosphere of the garage.
One evening, after a particularly long day, you found yourselves alone in the garage. You were finishing up some data analysis when Lewis wandered over, two bottles of water in hand. You got dejavu, as your mind flashed to when Charles would get you coffee and drive you home whenever you had long days.
“Thought you might need this.” He said, handing you one.
“Thanks, Lewis, you’re a lifesaver.”
He took a seat next to her, watching her work. “You know, you’ve got this incredible focus. It’s impressive.”
You smiled, a little flustered by the compliment. “It’s part of the job.”
“Still, it’s something, I’ve been meaning to ask, how did you end up here? With Ferrari, I mean.”
You paused, considering how to condense years of passion and hard work into a few sentences. “I’ve always loved racing. Grew up watching it with my family. I studied engineering because I wanted to be part of this world, and Ferrari… well, it’s the dream, isn’t it?”
“It really is, and you’re amazing at what you do. The team’s lucky to have you.” Lewis nodded, genuinely believing his words.
“Thanks, Lewis. That means a lot.” You felt a blush creep up your cheeks.
As the days turned into weeks and the weeks turned to months, you noticed more about Lewis. His dedication to his craft, the way he treated everyone on the team with respect, and his infectious enthusiasm. He was different from what you had expected, and you found yourself drawn to him in ways you hadn’t anticipated.
There was a particular day that stood out. You had a meeting scheduled and as you waited for it to begin, you were both early. Lewis started telling a story about an adventure he had on a race weekend in Japan.
“So there I was, completely lost in Tokyo, and none of my apps were working. I couldn’t read the signs, and I was pretty sure I was going to end up on the news as the driver who went missing in the middle of a city. Then, out of nowhere, this old lady comes up to me and starts speaking perfect English, asking if I needed help. Turns out she used to live in London. She got me back to my hotel, and we still exchange Christmas cards.”
“Only you, Lewis. Only you.” You laughed, shaking your head.
“What can I say? Adventure finds me.” He said with a wink.
It was in these moments that you started to notice his attractiveness, not just physically, though he was undeniably handsome, but in the way he carried himself, the kindness in his eyes, and the warmth of his smile. He made you laugh, made you feel seen and appreciated. It was a stark contrast to the complicated, often unspoken dynamics you had with Charles.
As time went on the lines between her professional and personal life began to blur once more, but with a new Ferrari driver. You and Lewis continued to grow closer, your bond solidifying with each shared laugh and meaningful conversation. Yet, with each passing day, the tension between you and Charles grew more.
One morning, as you arrived at the garage, Charles was waiting for you, his usual easygoing demeanour replaced with a more serious expression. Something that you picked on instantly, you can read Charles easily.
“Hey.” He greeted, handing you a cup of your favourite coffee. “Got a minute?”
“Sure, thanks for the coffee” You replied, knowing that something big is about to drop. “What’s up?”
He led her to a quieter corner of the garage, away from the prying eyes and ears of your colleagues. “I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something. It’s... about Lewis.”
You sighed inwardly, bracing yourself. “What about him?”
“I’ve noticed you two have been spending a lot of time together.” Charles ran a hand through his hair, a habit you knew indicated he was stressed.
“Yes, we have. He’s new and has a lot of questions. We’ve become friends.” You nodded, keeping your voice steady.
“Friends?” Charles echoed, a hint of scepticism in his voice. “It seems like more than that.”
“Charles, we are friends.” You looked him in the eye, his stare was unwavering, you’ve never hidden anything from Charles, it wasn’t in your nature. You blinked a few times before you continued, your voice dropping a little. “I may have feelings for him and I’m pretty sure he feels the same.
His jaw tightened, and he looked away for a moment before speaking again. “I just don’t want to see you get hurt. He’s got a reputation, you know.”
“Lewis has been nothing but kind and respectful to me.” You countered. “I appreciate your concern, Charles, but I can handle this.”
“Alright. Just... be careful, okay?” He sighed, his shoulders slumping slightly.
“I will.” You promised, feeling a mix of relief and guilt as you walked away.
That evening, after another successful session, Lewis invited you out for dinner. As you sat in a cosy restaurant, the conversation flowed easily, and you found yourself relaxing in his presence.
“You look like you’ve got a lot on your mind,” Lewis observed, his eyes searching your face.
“Just the usual stress of the job.” You smiled, waving him off. “Nothing I can’t handle.”
“Anything I can help with?” It takes you a moment to answer before you decide to confide in him,
“It’s Charles. He’s... concerned about us spending time together, he thinks I might get hurt.”
Lewis’s expression softened. “I understand where he’s coming from, but I want you to know, I’m serious about this. About us.”
“I know.” You said, reaching out to squeeze his hand, fighting the blush from forming on your cheeks. “I just need to figure out how to manage everything.”
Charles sat alone in his hotel room, the dim light casting long shadows on the walls. The conversation with you earlier played over and over in his mind. He had always thought your friendship was special, but seeing you with Lewis had stirred something deep within him, something he couldn’t ignore any longer.
His phone buzzed on the nightstand, a new message from you: “Thank you for understanding, Charles. It means a lot to me.”
He stared at the words, feeling a pang of longing and regret. How had he not seen it before? The way his heart quickened whenever you laughed, the comfort he felt in your presence, the jealousy that gnawed at him every time he saw you with Lewis, it all pointed to one undeniable truth. He was in love with you.
Memories flooded his mind: the late-night conversations, the shared glances across the garage, the way you always seemed to know what he needed without him having to ask. He had taken it all for granted, thinking it was simply the bond of close friendship. But now, faced with the reality of losing you to someone else, he realised just how much you meant to him.
Charles leaned back against the headboard, running a hand through his hair. How could he have been so blind? He had always been there for you, and you for him, but he had never allowed himself to consider the possibility of something more. Now, it seems, it might be too late.
On track after that, Charles found it hard to focus. His mind was clouded with thoughts of you, of what he needed to do. He watched you from a distance, your interactions with Lewis emphasising the urgency of his situation. He couldn’t stand by and watch you slip away without at least telling you how he felt. And from then on tension between him and Lewis started to mount.
One afternoon, as the team prepared for a crucial race weekend, the tension between Charles and Lewis came to a head. They were in the garage, going over the final preparations, when Charles finally voiced his frustration.
“Lewis, can we talk?” Charles asked, his tone clipped.
“Sure.” Lewis replied, sensing the underlying tension, and he had a pretty good idea why Charles wanted to talk to him.
They stepped outside, away from the hustle of the garage. Charles turned to face him, his eyes blazing. “What are your intentions with y/n?”
“My intentions? I care about her, Charles.” Lewis raised an eyebrow, taken aback by the directness. “Isn’t that obvious?”
“She means a lot to me.” Charles clenched his fists, struggling to keep his emotions in check. “I don’t want to see her hurt.”
“And you think I do?” Lewis shot back, his voice rising. “I’ve been nothing but honest with her. What about you, Charles? Have you told her how you feel?”
Charles was silent, the truth hanging heavily between them. He hadn’t, and now he feared it might be too late. It seemed that even Lewis knew about his feelings even before he did. Charles gave Lewis a nod and left him abruptly.
His feelings weren’t just affecting his relationship with you, and with Lewis but it started to be felt by the team as well, and it wouldn’t be long before the fans started to spot it as well.
Inside the garage, you could sense the growing tension between the two men. It was affecting the team’s morale, and you knew you had to do something. So you approached Charles.
“Charles, we need to talk.” You nodded to the side for him to follow her.
“What’s on your mind?” He asked once you stood in a quiet corner.
You took a deep breath, gathering your thoughts. “This... thing between you and Lewis, it needs to stop. It’s affecting the team.”
“I know.” He admitted, his voice unsteady. “I just... I can’t stand the thought of losing you.”
“You’re not losing me,” You said gently, giving him one of your smiles that always calmed him down, but it seemed like it wasn’t working at this moment. “But you need to understand that I have feelings for Lewis. And I need you to respect that.”
“I’m trying. But it’s hard.” Charles looked at you, his eyes filled with a mixture of pain and longing.
“I know it is.” You replied, placing a hand on his arm and his heart skipped a beat. “But we’ll get through this. We always do, as friends.”
This sent a bang to his heart, how many times he’s called you a friend not knowing the effect it had on you, it seemed like now he knows.
”What?” You asked, seeing the look on his face. “You have something you want to tell me.”
”I-uh…” Charles trailed off, his confidence suddenly gone.
”Charles, just say it.”
Charles took a deep breath, trying to steady his racing heart. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and there’s something I need to tell you. Something I should have said a long time ago, and maybe this is not the right time but I can’t hold it in any longer.”
“Okay. What is it?” Your heart started beating fast in your chest.
“I’m in love with you.” He blurted out, the words rushing out in a torrent of emotion. “I have been for a long time. I just... I didn’t realise it until now. Seeing you with Lewis made me see what I’ve been too afraid to acknowledge. I don’t want to lose you, not like this.”
“Charles... I...” Your eyes widened in shock and confusion, those words you’ve longed to hear for years, and here he is saying them to you, but… it’s a bit late. This just complicated everything.
“I know this is sudden,” He continued, his voice trembling slightly. “And I know you have feelings for Lewis. But I had to tell you. I couldn’t keep it to myself any longer. You mean everything to me, and I can’t stand the thought of not trying.”
You were silent for a long moment, your gaze dropping to the ground as you processed his words. When you finally looked up, your eyes were filled with a mix of sadness and uncertainty.
“Charles, I... I don’t know what to say.” You admitted. “This is a lot to take in. I care about you so much, but I also have feelings for Lewis. I’m- I'm just so confused right now.”
“I understand.” He said softly. “I’m not asking for an answer right now. I just needed you to know how I feel. Whatever you decide, I’ll respect it. But I couldn’t let you go without telling you the truth.”
“I need some time to figure this out.” Your emotions were everywhere and you couldn’t make sense of them.
“Take all the time you need.” He replied, his voice gentle. “I’ll be here, no matter what.”
As you walked away, Charles felt a strange sense of relief mingled with apprehension. He had laid his heart bare, and now the rest was up to you. All he could do was hope that, in the end, you would see that he was the one who truly loved her, that with all your shared memories spent together you’d choose him, and that it wasn’t too late.
As you walked away, you couldn’t help but feel the weight of the situation pressing down on you. Your mind is spinning, the weight of his confession pressing heavily on your heart. As much as you had longed to hear those words from him, the timing felt like a cruel twist of fate. You needed clarity, and the only person who could help you find it was Lewis.
So that evening, you went to Lewis’s hotel room. The city lights outside cast a warm glow, creating an intimate atmosphere. Lewis welcomed you in with a gentle smile, sensing the turmoil in your eyes.
“Hey.” He said softly, leading you to the sofa. “You look like you’ve had a rough day.”
You nodded, your emotions still raw from your earlier conversation with Charles. “I need to talk to you about something important.”
“What’s going on?” Lewis sat beside you, frowning.
“Charles confessed his feelings to me today.” You took a deep breath. “He told me he’s in love with me.”
“I see.” He knew about his feelings, but he didn’t think Charles actually had it in him to confess. “ And how do you feel about that?”
“It’s complicated.” You admitted, your voice trembling. “I’ve had feelings for Charles for a long time. I thought he only saw me as a friend, so I never said anything. But now...”
“I understand.” Lewis nodded, his gaze never leaving yours. “This must be really confusing for you.”
“It is.” Your voice barely above a whisper. “But the thing is, I’ve been waiting for Charles to notice me for years. And while I was waiting, I met you. You’ve been so kind, so genuine, and… I couldn’t help but start to have feelings for you.”
“I care about you a lot.” Lewis reached out, taking your hand in his. “More than I’ve cared about anyone in a long time. But I don’t want to be with you if your heart is somewhere else. You deserve to be happy, whatever that means for you.”
“I know. And that’s why I need to be honest with you.” Tears welled up in your eyes as you squeezed his hand, it’s all too much for you. “I’ve spent so much time waiting for Charles to return my feelings, and it’s cost me a lot of happiness. I don’t want to waste any more time. I want to give us a chance, Lewis. I want to see where this can go.”
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel pressured.” Lewis’s eyes softened with relief and warmth.
“I’m sure.” You nodded firmly, your decision made. “You’ve shown me what it feels like to be appreciated and cared for. I don’t want to let that go.”
“I’m glad to hear that.” He smiled, a genuine, heartfelt smile that made your heart flutter. “I promise, I’ll do everything I can to make you happy.”
You sat in silence for a moment, the weight of your decision settling between you both. You felt a sense of peace, knowing you had made the right choice for yourself. The future was uncertain, but with Lewis by your side, you felt ready to face it.
After your talk with Lewis, and your decision being made, you were filled with a mix of excitement and apprehension. Being with Lewis felt right, it was easy and your bond just grew stronger every day. He made you laugh, supported your ambitions and treated you with a level of respect and affection, you hadn’t realised you were missing.
But your past with Charles still haunted you, you saw him every day for work and there was a subtle tension over you and it affected the team dynamic. Charles was professional, as always, but there was a distance and coldness to his demeanour that hadn’t been there before. It hurt you to see him struggling, but you knew you had made the right choice. For yourself.
After a race weekend, that was hard and gruelling on you and Lewis and the rest of the team, Lewis took you out to a quiet restaurant. The conversation was light and filled with laughter, a welcome respite from the pressure that is their work.
“Can you believe how many laps we ran today?” Lewis joked, shaking his head. “I thought my arms were going to fall off.”
You laughed, enjoying the ease of your banter. “I was beginning to think they’d made you a permanent fixture on the track.”
As you continued to talk, you felt a warmth spreading through your chest. This was what you had been missing—genuine connection, unburdened by years of unspoken feelings and what-ifs.
Meanwhile, back at the hotel, Charles sat alone in his room once more, he was staring at his phone. He had been avoiding you, unsure of how to navigate your new reality. The thought of you with Lewis was a constant ache in his heart, but he couldn’t deny that you seemed happier. Unable to bear the silence any longer, Charles decided to reach out. He typed out a message, his fingers hovering over the send button before finally pressing it.
Can we talk? I miss our friendship.
Your phone buzzed just as you and Lewis were finishing dessert. You glanced at the screen, your heart sinking slightly at the sight of Charles’s name. Lewis noticed your expression and raised an eyebrow.
“Everything okay?” he asked gently.
You nodded, showing him the message. “It’s from Charles. He wants to talk.”
“Do you want to go see him? It’s okay if you do.” Lewis took your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.
“I think I should.” You said softly. “We need to clear the air.”
Later that evening, you found herself outside Charles’s hotel room, your heart pounding with a mix of anxiety and resolve. You knocked gently, and a moment later, the door opened to reveal Charles’s weary face.
“Hey,” he greeted, stepping aside to let you in.
“Hey.” You replied, taking a seat on the edge of the sofa. “You wanted to talk?”
“I did.” He nodded, closing the door and sitting opposite you. “I’ve been thinking a lot about what I said to you, and I realised I was being unfair. I shouldn’t have put you in that position.”
“Charles, it’s okay.” You said softly. “I’m glad you told me how you feel. But I also needed to be honest with myself. Waiting for you for so long, it was hard. And in that time, I found something real with Lewis.”
“I understand.” He looked down, his expression pained but accepting. “It just took me too long to see what was right in front of me. I don’t want to lose you as a friend, though. You mean too much to me.”
Your heart ached for him, for the years of missed opportunities and unspoken words.
“You won’t lose me, Charles. Our friendship is important to me too. It’ll take some time, but we can find a way to move forward.”
He nodded, a faint smile tugging at his lips. “I’d like that.”
And so the tension began to ease, it took time, but you and Charles found a new rhythm. Your friendship slowly mending as you navigated this new phase of thier relationship. Lewis was a constant source of support, his presence a steady anchor in the shifting tides of her emotions.
And so one race weekend, as the team prepared for another race, you found yourself standing between Lewis and Charles, the three of you chatting easily. There is a new understanding between you.
“Ready for this weekend?” Lewis asked, grinning at you.
You smiled, feeling a sense of contentment you hadn’t felt in a long time. “More than ever.”
Charles chimed in, his eyes warm with genuine affection. “We’ve got this.”
In that moment, surrounded by the people who meant the most to you, you knew you had made the right choices. Your relationships weren’t perfect but it was close to it. Most importantly you are happy.
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