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#i don't see a good way around it but it still sucks
mayasikeu · 3 days
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Hi I wanted to request enhypen x fan like nda kind of thing
so sorry for taking ages on this ive been really busy 🫶
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"You really shouldn't be here, Y/n," Jake said.
You swallowed hard, "I know."
He pinned you to the wall, closing the gap between you two. "Do you have any idea what could happen if anyone finds out?"
"That's why I signed the NDA, Jake."
"Still, how can I trust you?"
Your pulse quickened as he stepped closer, his presence overwhelming you as his tantalising breath fired you up. "You can Jake," you whispered. "I would never do anything to hurt you."
He reached out, his fingers brushing against your cheek gently. You shivered under his touch. "Why are you really here, Y/n?"
You closed your eyes, savouring the feel of his skin on yours. "Because I couldn't stop thinking about you."
Jake cupped your face in his hands, "You're playing with fire, you know that, right?"
"I don't care."
His lips twisted into a playful smirk. "You should."
You leaned towards him, your body beginning to ache for more. "Maybe. But I can't help it. I've wanted this for so long."
He let out a slow breath. His eyes never left yours as he stared at you lovingly, his gaze overflowing with sincerity and affection. "You have no idea how dangerous this is."
You lifted a hand to his chest, feeling the steady thump of his heartbeat beneath your palm. "Your eyes are telling me otherwise."
"Alright then. If that's how you want it."
Suddenly, you felt a pang of disappointment, but it quickly vanished as he stepped back, reaching for the hem of his shirt.
"Take it off," he ordered.
He groaned as he watched you take your shirt off, a sound that sent a thrill of adrenaline through your spine. "Now the bra."
You did as he asked, unhooking the lacy bra before tossing it on the carpet. "Good girl," he murmured, stepping forward again.
This time, when he reached for you, you didn't hesitate. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him close, and kissed him.
You whimpered against his lips. His tongue slipped past your lips, exploring your mouth hungrily. You met his thrusts eagerly and clutched onto him, afraid he might disappear if you let go. It all felt so surreal. Never in a million years would you have ever imagined yourself in such a situation with your bias.
He broke the kiss with a groan, his forehead resting against yours. "God, baby, you drive me fucking crazy," he panted.
His expression turned serious. "Are you sure about this?"
You nodded immediately, “Absolutely."
Jake's hands moved lower, unzipping your jeans and sliding them down your legs. He knelt before you, his face inches from your throbbing heat.
"You're already wet for me," he teased. With that, he pulled down your panties, exposing your glistening pussy.
You moaned as Jake's tongue flicked on your clit. He licked and sucked on your sweet bud. His fingers delved into your tight hole as he made out with your cunt.
"Oh, Jake... I'm gonna cum!" you cried out, your orgasm beginning to build up.
Jake didn't stop, his tongue and fingers working in perfect harmony. You threw your head all the way back as you came on his tongue. “You taste fucking amazing.” he hummed, licking all of your juices like a puppy.
"Get on your knees," he commanded, his voice suddenly cold and authoritative.
You obeyed instantly, sinking to your knees before him.
"Undo my belt," he ordered.
You tugged at the belt, your fingers shaking with excitement.
He exhaled sharply, his breathing heavy. "Now pull my pants down."
You did as he instructed, sliding the fabric down until they pooled at his feet.
"Like what you see?" he taunted, his voice dripping with arrogance.
You nodded, unable to tear your gaze away from his large cock. "You’re just as big as I imagined."
He smirked, reaching down to grasp your chin. "Good. Because you're going to show me just how much you like it."
He released your chin, his hand moving to stroke himself. "Suck it."
Your breath hitched, a thrill coursing through your veins. You hesitated only a moment before reaching out, wrapping your fingers around his veiny shaft. He let out a hiss of pleasure, his eyes closing as you began to stroke him.
"That's it baby," he encouraged. "Now put me in your mouth."
You complied, opening your mouth and taking the tip of him inside. He groaned, his hips jerking forward involuntarily.
You swirled your tongue around the head, tasting his salty pre-cum all over your tastebuds. Jake's hands tangled in your hair, guiding your movements as you deep-throated him, taking him all the way to the back of your throat effortlessly.
"Oh fuck," he cursed, his fingers untangling to rest on the back of your head. "You're killing me, Y/n."
He slowly fucked his dick into your mouth as he let out soft moans with every thrust. You gagged slightly, the sensation both uncomfortable and exhilarating.
He pulled back, his eyes blazing with desire. "On the bed, now," he rasped.
Jake entered you in one deep thrust, burying himself in your cunt. You gasped as Jake began to move, his cock massaging your G spot with precision. He pounded into you, his balls slapping against your ass relentlessly.
Your body trembled with pleasure, back arching off his bed as the room became filled with his name. He fucked you slow and sensually, wanting to enjoy the feeling of you clenching around him for as long as you both could take it.
"Fuck, that's it," Jake groaned. "You're gonna make me cum."
"Cum for me, baby," he grunted, his own release building.
Your body tightened around Jake's cock as you climaxed, your pussy milking his cock. Jake roared as he emptied his load deep inside of you, his hot cum mixing with your juices.
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ahgasegotarmy116 · 2 days
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Just Take It | Jeon Jungkook | Part 7
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Summary: Your friend "date" with Jungkook is interesting but thankfully the events from this morning don't prevent you from having a good time. Pairing: Inexperienced f!reader x Best Friend's Dad Jungkook (20 year age gap) Word Count: 3.8K (I'm sorry it's short but I wanted to get it out since it's been way too long) Warnings: No real warnings other than slightly jealous and possessive Jungkook (but we all know that's a good warning 🤭) a/n: It's been fucking four months I'm so sorry 😭 It's been so hard for me to update my series recently since my attention span literally sucks right now so one shots have been a lot easier to get out but hopefully some of you guys are still around to read this story 🥲 p.s. the last third of this isn't edited at all so please ignore any nonsense 😅
After Jungkook and I finally agree on an outfit for me to wear we head off to whatever mysterious location he's taking us to. 
"You gonna pout all the way there?" he teases, pointing out my crossed arms and legs and the fact that I haven't spoken to him since we left. "I told you I hate surprises" I grumble, the feeling of the unknown making me uncomfortable. 
"You've gotta live a little Darling" he teases and goes back to driving. He hands me his phone that's plugged into the aux as a sign for me to put on a playlist and that brings up my mood right away. He chuckles when he sees me put on my favorite song since he knows that music always lifts my spirits.
"You're never gonna get tired of this song are you?" he sighs, this being the twelfth time he's asked. "Nope" I answer, popping the 'p' at the end. "This song came out when you were two years old" he chuckles, trying to clue me in but I don't pay any mind to it. "All the more reason to like it!" I argue back and he shakes his head.
"Perfect Man by Shinhwa is a masterpiece and I will accept no arguments" I say, making my statement on the matter final. 
There's a quiet air that's hung between us for a couple moments before when both bust out laughing. "I swear we never fail to have the same conversation every time I play this song" I point out and he smiles.
"That's because I love watching you defend something with your whole being. It's cute" he says and my throat gets dry. 
This being the first semi flirty comment he's thrown at me since everything happened. Well, besides commenting on how I look because who wants to be told nothing after putting on a cute outfit, even when he's the one who's chosen it. 
His comments have been nothing but respectful so there's no harm in letting him do as he pleases but it's just making this whole friends ordeal a lot harder.
~~~~~~
As we pull up to the place he had kept a secret from me I realize why he had me wear this specific outfit since from the looks of it we've come to some sort of ropes course. 
"I've never been to one of these" I say, marveling at the zip lines, ropes, ladders and pulley systems that are strewn about this forested area.
"Do you wanna give it a try? We can always just go to the restaurant they have here but I thought I would still offer it since I told you I had something fun planned for us" he offers, leaving the choice up to me but I nod my head immediately, really wanting to try it out. 
"Yeah?" he chuckles when he sees my excitement grow. "Yes! Come on let's go!" I say, grabbing his hand and trying to drag him along.
"Wait a second Bunny" he chuckles, holding me back and I watch him as he opens the trunk and grabs a big hoodie for me to wear. "So we don't mess up that pretty little top you're wearing" he says and the playfulness around the statement making my heart skip a beat. 
"I could've brought my own" I say but he shakes his head in protest. "It's easier this way so you don't have to worry about it getting dirty, now arms up" he says and I furrow my brow. "Jungkook I can put it on myself" I laugh but he doesn't find it amusing. "I know, arms up" he orders and I do as he says, laughing at the no doubt comical sight of him struggling with it. 
"You know now that I think about it it's a lot easier to take your clothes off than it is to put them on" he casually says, making me wack him in the arm once the hoodie is on properly. "Friends Jungkook. Or I can go back to calling you Mr. Jeon" I say with an arched brow and he chuckles. "Friends" he agrees and closes the trunk.
"So can we go now?" I ask, glancing over at the course before looking back to him for approval. "Yes Bunny go ahead" he says, giving me the go ahead and following after me as I make a bee line for the equipment room. 
"Hi!" I say excitedly to the guy at the counter when it's my turn to check us in. "Hey, first time?" he chuckles, me looking around at everything with a childlike wonder in my eyes. "Yeah! I honestly didn't even know a place like this existed around here" I admit, Jungkook again taking me to a place I had never been before. 
I guess he really is determined to take all of my firsts. 
"Well I hope you'll come around more often then, there's a whole lot more to experience than just these ropes" he says and in my awestruck state I don't notice the suggestive tone behind his wording. 
"You find something you like?" he asks, my sight going past him and looking at all the harnesses. "I have a friend that's coming in a second so do you think you could get us two?" I ask while pointing at them. 
"Sure, is your friend as pretty as you are?" he asks and before I can even think of a response someone is interrupting our conversation. "I would think so" I hear a deep voice say behind me, his hand placed on my hip in a slight possessive manner making my breath hitch. 
The boy's eyes widen a bit, looking at the dynamic between the two of us and doesn't exactly know what to make of it and decides to go find harnesses for the both of us. 
"What was that?" I ask, whipping around and glaring up at him. "What? We agree to be friends for a little while and suddenly you're ready to jump ship?" Jungkook says, crossing his arms and watching as the boy not so casually glances over at us. 
"He was just being friendly" I scoff, knowing for a fact that he wasn't but playing into this oblivious act I had accidentally fallen into. "Right...friendly" he says in a monotone, not wanting to get into a senseless argument and taking the high road. I don't miss the way his hand balls into a fist for a second before relaxing it once I've decided to drag him over to look at the little souvenirs they have in the shop. 
"Alright here's a harness for you, and one for you sir." the employee says, a flirtatious tone in his voice when he addresses me and a more strict and professional voice when he addresses Jungkook. 
"Did you want some help putting that on?" the boy asks, clearly just taking it as a chance to get closer to me since Jungkook's slight display of possessiveness of me wasn't a big enough clue that we may...or may not be together. "Oh no that's okay, I'm sure you've got other things to do" I deny, stepping into it on my own and in true y/n fashion I end up tripping over one of the straps. 
"Careful Darling" Jungkook says, steadying me on my feet and when I look back over at the boy he's awkwardly frozen with his arms out, having intended to help me but decided against it since he was smart enough to realize that it might not be the smartest idea. 
I look between the boy and Jungkook and see how Jungkook hasn't stopped glaring at him no matter how uncomfortable the boy is. "Looks like you've got other customers to help" Jungkook says, nodding towards the people at the counter, clearly looking to check in just as we did. 
"Right, well let me know if you need anything" he responds, his focus completely on me as he relays his message. "I will" Jungkook jumps in and the boy nervously glances between the two of us before heading over to the counter and helping the group of four that just came in. 
"Was that really necessary?" I ask, my arms crossed over my chest as Jungkook tightens the harness on me, making sure I won't need any 'help' with it later. "He was trying way too hard and he clearly couldn't get a clue about us" he says, his glare still prevalent in his direction. 
"Jungkook there isn't an 'us' right now okay" I say and he sighs. "Keep on telling yourself that" he mumbles quite enough that I couldn't make it out when another crowd comes in. "What was that?" I ask but he quickly brushes it off and herds me out of the store before it gets even more crowded. 
As we wait for the group to now gather in the waiting area outside neither of us have spoken a word to each other, stealing glances every so often since we just can't help it. We're attracted to each other and from my point of view I don't think that's gonna change anytime soon. 
"Alright everyone can I get you all gathered over here?" that same guy from inside the shop calls out and we all do as he says with Jungkook cursing under his breath. "Fucking fantastic, he's our leader" he grumbles but I grab him by the arm and drag him so we can catch up with the group. 
"Come on I thought you said this was supposed to be fun" I say and he sighs, collecting himself and slowly changing his attitude. "Alright I'm sorry Darling" he says, not dragging his feet or sulking anymore and putting that nonsensical jealously out of his head...at least for right now. 
"Alright welcome welcome everyone to BranchBound Adventures! How's everyone doing today?" he asks and we all let out cheers of excitement but what I don't notice is the way that Jungkook looks at me with a soft smile when he realizes again how much I'm loving this already. He takes a mental note to bring me here again soon so he can watch that same childlike excitement bloom again. 
"Excellent, looks like we've got a fun group here today! Well my name is Jayson and this is Kimberly and we're gonna be your BranchBound Buddies, sound good?" he says and I can't ignore the way Jungkook snorts at the title they've been given but it's only loud enough for me to hear thankfully. 
"Behave!" I scold, not wanting to turn this into some sort of immaturity contest when he knows damn well he's a grown ass adult and he should not be acting like this. He holds his hands up in surrender when he sees my glare but can't help but smirk at the fact that Jayson as we've recently found out his name is watching our exchange. 
As the day goes by and we're close to the end of our little ropes course adventure Jayson decides it's now or never and decides to make another move. 
"You've done a great job today! Didn't know you would be so good with ropes" he says, not hiding the fact that he's probably imagining using these ropes on me in a completely different context. "Yeah I didn't know I would be either" I chuckle and look over and see Jungkook glaring daggers into Jayson's forehead while he hooks me up to the zip line.
"Did you want to go nice and slow or fast?" he asks, his eyes drinking me in but I don't pay him any mind as I just watch the way that Jungkook is reacting to our exchange. "Y/n?" Jayson asks, breaking me out of the trance I had been lost in, thinking about what Jungkook would do to me after this if we were together. 
"Sorry what?" I ask and I can tell that he's pretty much starting to get the memo at this point. "Nothing, just tuck your legs in close to you if you want to go faster" he explains and I nod my head and wait while Jungkook gets hooked up to the other line thats parallel to mine. 
"Wanna race?" I challenge him since I know he would never back down from one. "What do I get if I win?" he says with a smirk.
"Whatever you want..." I say nervously and I have a feeling I'm going to regret that. "...but I want ice cream if I win!" I say to wipe away the tension but he brings it right back with his claim if he wins.
"I want a kiss" he says and when he clearly sees the way that I'm gearing up to protest a simple cock of his brow silences that. "You said that I could have anything I want right?" he asks I sigh and nod, my energy to go back on my word dissipating. 
It's just one kiss right?
"Deal" I agree and he can't hold back the smile and vote of confidence it gives him. "Get ready to lose" he says and before I have a chance to argue back Kimberly is counting us off and in my semi scattered state Jungkook takes off before me giving him a ten second head-start. 
"No fair!" I call after him when I'm finally able to catch up and he let's out a hearty laugh. "You're the one who proposed this whole race Bunny" he says making me look away, 'his timing with that nickname is always impeccable', I think to myself as I hide my blush.
"Hurry up!" I hear him call out as he is suddenly a lot further down the line than I am. "Hey!" I laugh, deciding to put that thought away to not sour my mood and just focus on there here and now. 
Once I finally get to the end Jungkook has already gotten unhooked from the zip line and is standing victorious waiting to claim his prize. 
"You only won because you're taller than me" I grumble as if I'm actually upset that he won when in fact the thought of him putting in effort just to kiss me make my heart beat faster. "I thought smaller things were supposed to be more aerodynamic" he teases in response but I huff and stand in front of him, clearly waiting for him to claim his reward. 
"I didn't say when I was going to kiss you" he teases and walks away and back toward the shop where we had first come from since our time is up. "Hey!" I protest again, not liking the slight embarrassment he caused me. 
"Oh come on you'll be okay" he teases as he takes his harness off and then helps me out of mine after. "Whatever" I huff and something behind me catches his eye and before I'm able to turn around he's knocking me off my feet and giving me a rather over exaggerated kiss if you ask me to the point that people are whistling and hyping us up.
I hit on his chest when I'm finally running out of air and he carefully puts me back on my feet and when I catch the sight of Jayson staring at us with an unreadable expression on his face I know now why he did that. 
"You're insufferable" I huff and fix my rumbled clothes from his breathless kiss but he doesn't seem bothered in the slightest. "Interesting response after receiving a kiss that made you blush but I'll take it" he shrugs and we both head back into the gift shop for the last time so Jungkook can no doubt flaunt the fact that from Jayson's point of view we're together. 
Honestly I could care less and I won't deny that it was hot as fuck watching him get angry with the very minimal interactions Jayson and I had but I won't let him have that satisfaction. "Didn't realize you were so insecure" I taunt and make sure his eyes are on me before I look over to where Jayson is still clearly watching us and give him a flirty wave goodbye with Jungkook hurrying to usher me out. 
"I wouldn't be insecure if you were mine already so until then you'll have to be patient with me" he says through gritted teeth, a reaction I was hoping for from that little stunt I pulled. "I can manage" I say and walk off towards the only restaurant here where I'm sure he was planning on taking me and when he follows me and has a hand placed low on my waist to guide me there my suspicions are confirmed. 
"Reservation for Jeon" he says to the host at the front desk and while he looks for it Jungkook's demeanor is a little softer, that soft maturity coming back from having us in a controlled and relaxed environment. "Right this way Mr and Mrs. Jeon" the host says and I practically choke on air at that, the title mistakenly given to me sending my heart into overdrive. 
"Don't worry she's fine, come on Honey" Jungkook reassures the waiter as Jungkook encourages me along to follow him to our table. 
Once we're seated our waiter comes by immediately to bring us water since I had clearly caused enough of a spectacle to garner a hurried solution for my coughing fit. He gives us our menus as well soon after and leaves us be, allowing me some more space to compose myself. 
Jungkook can't hide the smile he's had since my reaction had started and has turn slightly smug at seeing the blush it had caused me. "Shut up" I grumble and take another gulp of water having traded his glass for mind since I had practically drank mine in one go after that. 
"I didn't say anything" he chuckles leaving me glaring at him. "But your face did" I say after having put my almost empty glass back down on the table. "Oh yeah? And what is it saying now?" he asks, leaning forward as if he was giving me a better look at it. 
"It's saying that you're enjoying the fact that I'm still squirming over the thought of being called Mrs. Jeon" I say and he sits back, proud of my intuition. "Impressive Bunny. Better get used to it though" he says cockily and I narrow my eye at him and scoff. 
"You're pretty confident for someone I technically haven't agreed to date" I say but his smirk widens before throwing out a playful 'Yet' and our waiter is back at our table before I have a chance to argue back. 
After the waiter has taken our order and a little while after is bringing out our food our conversations have gone back to what had been seen as normal for us. A slight flirty edge to his words which I not so subtly glare at in response always making him chuckle but it's getting harder and harder for me to want to do that.
Why should I scold him? It's not like I don't want him too...
As we finish up the day with the ice cream I technically did not earn we start to make our way back to his car where he opens the door for me and make it a point to put on my seatbelt so I can still enjoy the cone I'm almost finished with. 
"Thanks Dad" I tease after he's buckled me in like a child and I'm granted a sarcastic smile in return only making me smile harder. He closes the door and gets in on his side and soon we're on our way back to the house...
~~~~~
The ride back is quiet, comfortable but quiet with the only sound being the hum of my playlist coming through the speaker and the gusts of cool air coming through the vents but it's soon broken by the question he's been wanting to ask. 
"Did you have fun?" it's a simple question but I know thoughts of what had happened earlier today are coming back to him as we get closer and closer to the house. "I did, a lot actually. You're not too shabby at planning dates" I confirm and he glances over with a smirk. 
"I thought this wasn't a date?" he counters and I chuckle. "It wasn't until you kissed me" I say and he shakes his head. "A kiss equals a date, got it" he says quietly, tucking that information into his back pocket and I can't help but smile as I see a soft one still rests on his lips. 
~~~~
When we finally pull into the driveway and he turns off the engine I hold onto his arm for a second, asking him to stay in the car for a second so he does and sits back and keeps his eyes on me, waiting for what I have to say.
The thing is is that I don't know what to say, I don't even know why I asked him to stay in here but he just watches me fondly, not rushing anything and waiting patiently for me. 
"I don't think we can be friends" I say, looking down at my lap so I can't see the expression he has on his face. "What do you mean by that Bunny?" he asks, that nickname making my heart skip a beat like it does every time and I shake my head, still looking down at my lap. "I mean, I don't wanna be friends" I say hoping he'll understand and when he lifts my chin I expect him to ask me to explain what I mean but instead I'm met with his lips on mine.
They're not full of passion or lust or anything of the sort. Just pure longing and understanding, understanding of the want to go about things at my own pace, an understanding that he's okay with going slow and that's all I need. 
"We can go slow" he says after we've broken the kiss, audibly confirming what he had physically displayed and I bite back a smile and nod before placing a soft kiss on his lips. 
"Thank you" I whisper and he pulls away to get a better look at me. "Whatever for?" he asks in such a cute way I can't help but laugh. "For not forcing me or making me feel bad about my indecision" I say and he smiles and cups my face, brushing his thumb along my cheekbone, a sad smile on his face at the thought of what I might've gone through with Jared that would require that sense of relief from his actions. 
"I'm sorry about this morning" I say even softer this time and he nods, "I know" and those two words bring me comfort in ways that he couldn't understand even if I told him.
I was scared shitless that I had messed things up, that I had done something that could've damaged us beyond repair but his words and actions from today told me nothing of the sort. 
His maturity shows that he knows what he wants and I want to open up and show him that in return...but I just hope I won't regret it.
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captain-joongz · 21 hours
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You know how Hongjoong has those fucking gorgeous thick thighs? Yeah I wanna leave marks on them so bad. Fuck hickeys on the neck, I want to give him hickeys on his thighs grrrrr
(If you write anything sub hongjoong please, idc what type but I dont read dom member ever cus it gives me the ick)
oooh anon you don't even know how much i understand you. do you remember when Hongjoong wore that striped crop top and light blue jeans? those pictures had me going crazy for his thighs and ass for days. our captain is just so well built~
and i'm definitely not opposed to writing sub!idols, it's a nice change for me and i am a switch (tho i mostly lean towards sub, but sometimes i get dominant streaks - especially with joong, hwa and yoongi, those guys drive me insane)
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warnings: subby joong, marking, edging, begging, riding, unprotected sex
i go absolutely crazy for marks, so i fully understand your plight, and joongie just has such beautiful thighs and stomach, made for you to mark up as you please. i know i wouldn't be able to help myself
and whether we're talking about idol!joong or any other au, we know that our captain is just a helpless workaholic that will spend entire days working, dragging himself home just to sleep a few hours and then go right back to his job, and that puts a lot of strain on his psyche, so every now and then he needs a good caring for, a reminder that he can let go and someone will give him everything that he needs
that's where you come in, always ready to indulge your boyfriend and help him destress - and one of your favourite ways to do this is to have him all marked up writhing in pleasure under you, begging you for more and crying with how good he feels
his thighs are so strong and beautiful, and the honey-toned skin bruises so prettily, darkens to deep purple, and he responds even better when you take your teeth to his skin, leaving bite marks nicely encircling the dark dark bruises. but what's even better is how he tenses and jerks and jumps with every sharp prick of pain at a new mark made, whines and whimpers slipping out of his lips effortlessly
you always love to see how his eyes grow more and more hazy as he surrenders himself completely to the pleasure, giving up the reins and letting himself be carried by the flow. when he's really tired he always turns so sweet and pliant, all needy and teary-eyed, whimpering anytime your travelling hands brush over his perked up sensitive nipples or when your mean fingers dig into the bruised skin to draw out the burn
and even with his pretty cock all hard and red, wet and smattered in precum, you ignore it in favour of sucking and biting more spots into his abs - you're never satisfied until he's all covered in your spit and love, until there are tear tracks on his cheeks and drool slipping out the corner of his mouth without you even touching him where he wants it the most, cause that's when he's begging for you the sweetest
he'd want to cum so bad, and he wouldn't be shy to ask for it, countless whiney "please, please, please!" spilling out of his mouth, hands gripping into the bedding because he wouldn't dare displease you by touching where he's not supposed to
and when he was desperate, teary and marked up enough, you'd finally relent. the moment you finally sunk down on his cock would have him choking on his spit and moans, body tensing as he fought not to cum - he knew you wouldn't be happy about it, he still needed to earn your permission
whether you'd ride him quick and rough or slow and sensual would probably be up to your mood, but if he was really tired and just needing a release, you'd find it in yourself to take it easy on him, languidly rolling your hips on him and clenching your cunt around him to drive him closer to that peak
and he'd look so fucking beautiful under you like that, pretty tears tracking down his face, eyes hazy and mouth slack in pleasure, head thrown back, tits all bitten up. he'd be a vision, your vision, and you'd want nothing more than finally give him what he so desperately needed
after all, he'd been such a good boy for you, begged so prettily for you and worked so hard so he could spoil you, he deserved everything - and you'd tell him as much, smothering him in praises that would make him cry and whimper even more - he wanted nothing more than to be your good boy
"please, please, let me cum, i've been so good" he'd cry endlessly, and finally when you were also close you'd let him, allowing him to spill himself into you while you rode both your orgasms out. he'd cum with the most melodious relieved moans and then ragdoll into the sheets, completely sated and spent
and after wiping him clean, watching him slip in and out of content sleep and whispering more praises about how he pleased you so well, you'd finally settle in, pulling Hongjoong into your chest and petting his hair as he slipped off into the most comfortable sleep he had in a while
he could always count on you to give him just what he needed
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our second ask, phew this one was so fun to write! everybody needs a little subby joong in their life, god just how much i want to spoil him and pamper him <3
hard hours continue!! don't be shy and come submit your own fantasies!
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divider from @cafekitsune
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blueishspace · 1 day
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Looped Sun 15
Loop #451
Mumbo wasn't sure about trying out Double Life, especially in a null loop like this one...but Grian had asked and he wasn't able to say no. So there he was, ready to see how this would go down.
TangoTek was blown up by a creeper.
Solidaritygaming died.
Mumbo didn't expect Tango to die the same way so he had to assume they were unawake this time around. It had been a while since they looped together now that he tought about it. Oh well.
Skizz: Hey man!
Mumbo: O-oh! You are here too?
Skizz: Sure thing!
Mumbo: O-oh...have you found your soulmate yet mate?
Skizz: No, have you?
Mumbo: ... Not really. Do you think...?
Skizz: No hurt in checking! Come on dude, punch me!
Mumbo: Oh pants! Uh... here you go?
Turns out they were soulmates, guess it made sense since the other pairs seemed to be the same.
Mumbo: I see skeletons!
Skizz: I'm on them!
Mumbo: Try not to die please?
Skizz: What's up!? What's up!?
Mumbo: O-oh I'll help!! Wait for me!
Well, they didn't win...not that he expected them to. It was lots of fun though.
Loop #453
Pearl had loved her first Avatar the last airbender loop, Katara had been a great teacher and she still used waterbending often... She didn't like this specific Avatar loop though, mostly because she was stuck as a fish.She got it of course, moon spirit, PearleascentMoon, sge wasn't stupid... but still being a fish in small small pond while swimming in literal circles is mind numbing.
Then of course came the general who tried to kill her, which was rude by the way, and she had to deal with him...fortunately chaos magic still worked as a fish.
Loop #457
Grian: And that's Uno.
Jimmy: No! No! You can't let him win.
Tango: I got nothing...
Mumbo: M-me neither. Scott?
Scott: ...Pearl? ... I'm sorry, +4.
Pearl: Don't worry mate, I got you. +4.
Grian: What!? Noo! Pearl why!?!
Jimmy: And It's my turn!
Grian: Ok, what if we traded?
Pearl: Go on.
Grian: I'll give you one of the red properties so you can get the monopoly if you give me that one.
Pearl: So you can get a monopoly too?
Grian: It's a win-win.
Pearl: ... Sure. Here you go.
Grian: I hate this. I hate life.
Mumbo: O-oh!
Scott: Look at the bright side.
Grian: What bright side?
Scott: Jimmy is sucking so bad.
Grian: You what, you are right. The game of life is my favorite now.
Jimmy: Wha- hey.
Tango: I mea ... He's not lyificating.
Jimmy: Rancher, you too? Betrayal!
Mumbo: Oh ...ok... Before blank all we had was blank.
Pearl: Ooh a double.
Scott: I have an idea but I also hate it.
Jimmy: I ...don't like this game...
Tango: Well, here goes nothing.
Mumbo: Ok let's see... Before s-sexy pillow fights all we had was gladiator fights? I don't get it...
Pearl: Yeah that was just boring.
Grian: Listen, I had 0. Absolutely 0 good cards.
Jimmy: I like this one a lot better.
Grian: Timmy ... Timmy this is not a game, It's Mumbo's tarot card.
Jimmy: I stand with what I said. So what did I get?
Mumbo: Oh! That's the... that's the fool.
Jimmy: Nice! ... What does it mean?
Mumbo: Youth... and luck...it depends.
Loop #459 (part 1)
Jimmy: Uh, were are we?
Tango: It looks like a dungeon entrance?
Jimmy: Well, I got that.
Scott: Oh fuck I know what loop this is. This is bad.
Tango: You do?
Scott: This is fear and hunger.
Jimmy: ... Oh...I heard about it. The very non pg one?
Tango: Are the two of you going to share.
Scott: This... We can do this, It's not a null loop or anything. It should be doable.
Scott: It's...really dark. Darker then the game.
Tango: I can have my flame hair on, it might help.
Jimmy: Or I could do the sun incantation? Make my hair glow.
Scott: No, no. You need to sing for it to work, we can't risk your throat getting tired too early on.
Jimmy: ...Alright.
Tango: Aren't you like a god of order Scott? Can't you do anything to help?
Scott: Not really, my divinity here is really diminished for some reason. Probably the influence of the old gods.
Jimmy: Wait I hear a voice!
Tango: Uh!? Where!?
Jimmy: It's...
Jimmy enveloped himself with a thin layer of Listener magic.
Jimmy: That way!
Tango: What-
Scott: Since when are you a Listener?
Jimmy: Pretty early on in my loops, it happens sometimes. Oh, I hear it again. It sounds young!
Tango: A door?
Jimmy: We obviously need to get to other side!
Scott: Let me try something.
And in a flash of blue Scott is gone... A few seconds later the door opens with Scott behind it.
Scott: The tesseract still works.
Jimmy: Is that a little girl?
Tango: Why is she in a cage? Scott?
Scott: ... It's complicated...just help me get her out.
Tango: The cage doesn't look too hard to breakificate. Just pull a bit and uh... It's harder then it looks. I'm going to melt it-
Scott: And risk molten metal getting on the girl?
Tango: Point... I'll just use an axe.
Jimmy: Hello there! Who are you?
Girl: ...
Jimmy: Right uh... I'll introduce myself first if you want.
Girl: ...
Jimmy: Right, I'm Jimmy, that's Tango and that is Scott.
Girl: ...
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angelsrcute · 13 hours
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You said dom reader is okay so I am LAYING MY BRAINROT ON THE TABLE—
I'd like to respectfully request Overblot Boys (sans Riddle) being dominated by the reader (preferably afab & gn, there's so much submissive fem reader stuff out there & I want rep as a dom-leaning vers).
Those poor boys all need some therapizing & to get out of their own heads so bad— so what's a better way of doing so than taking charge and making them forget how to speak by pleasuring them? Sure, they can be defiant; and they can deal with a firm hand correcting them. But good boys who admit they need help & ask for it can be rewarded with fucking until they're empty and fuzzy-headed. ^^
The only one I had a semi-specific scenario in mind for was Jamil— him being blindfolded while being sucked off. His attempt at trying to regain control leads to him getting a smack on the ass & tied up so the reader can mark his pretty torso with hickies that they press on while cooing to him & edging him until he yields.
... can you tell I've been repressed lately? Lmao-
WALK EM LIKE A DOG. 𝝑𝝔
૮𐔌ྀི ´ ཀ ྀི 𐦯ྀིა 𝐍-𝐬𝐟𝐰 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 !! ; Sub!Leona, Jamil and Azul (separate) + Dom!F!Reader ➜ cws: Brat taming, nipple play, biting, blindfold use, gag use, spanking (once), restraints (Jamil), mommy kink, crying, use of strap on, praising (Azul), leash and collar use, cunnilingus, praising, hair pulling (Leona). ᡴꪫ‎
꒰ † ੭ — Part 1; I absolutely loved writing for this idea! Though I'm still wondering about what to write for the rest, don't mind if it's late, haha! <3
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❝ 𝐉𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋 ❞ — 🪦
This man is definitely a brat, always running his big mouth off. So to make him behave you blindfolded him and put a cloth around his mouth, good, now he will finally shut up. You leave trails of kisses down his neck, biting and sucking on his sensitive spot. You kneel down and stroke his cock a few times before taking it in your mouth.
God, it felt so good, he could feel your eyes were on him— his back arching as he gripped the sheets. His moans were muffled by the gag, he tried to pull away but you held him, landing a smack on his ass. “Behave, if you want to cum, you'd have to be a good boy.” You spat out, smiling at his state. You continued what you were doing, pressing kisses on his cock and edging him! When are you even gonna let the poor boy cum!? Atleast he's listening to you like a good boy after being tied up because of his bratty attitude. <3
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❝ 𝐀𝐙𝐔𝐋 ❞ — 🪦
He'd be such a pathetic crying mess, your good little boy! Just shower him with praises and kisses while you thrust inside his hole with your strap-on and he's already fucked dumb. He can only focus on how good it feels, maybe being weak isn't so bad, if he gets to be in your arms. You'd wipe away his tears and tell him he's the best.
Worship his body, play with his sensitive little nipples, leave love bites on his skin— he loves it all, he'd show them off with no shame if he wanted to. He'd definitely be ashamed about the noises he's making so he buries his head between the pillow as you fuck him. Maybe this guy also has a mommy kink! <3
“Gonna cum for mommy, yeah? Let yourself go, my baby.”
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❝ 𝐋𝐄𝐎𝐍𝐀 ❞ — 🪦
He'd never admit he likes you dominating him, people are supposed to bow down before him— He is the king, isn't he? But no, you're currently sitting on the bed while holding the leash attached to his collar. How degrading. He can't believe he enjoys it!
His tongue darted out, lapping up your sweet juices. Your fingers tangling itself in his hair as you pull his head back, “How about you beg and maybe I'll end your punishment? Fair deal, right?”
He doesn't meet your eyes but whispers something you can't hear, “What was that, sweetie? You're always so loud, what's wrong, hm?” You try not to laugh at the pathetic man in front of you, you can see his ears turning red as he speaks louder, “P-Please let me pleasure you—”
“Good pup, go ahead.” You watch as he eagerly dives back, you grip his hair tighter as you feel your orgasm coming. You pull him closer and cum in his mouth, he licks you clean. You let go of his hair, letting him catch his breath, “Well done, now, let's reward you for being good for me, shall we?” <3
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zxxccx · 3 days
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Don't Take Too Long
This is a work of fiction. All characters are 18+. Contains male fart fetish, piss, and scat content.
Senior year was almost over. We were all looking forward to being done with high school and the end was in sight. We just had a few more random assignments left, finals, and then graduation. I was sitting in class one day and went to get my homework out of my backpack. After looking for a bit, I realized I didn't have it and must have left it in my locker. So, I got up and asked the teacher for the hall pass so that I could get it. As I was walking out of the classroom, one of my classmates named Josh called out to me. Josh was your typical gym bro and had a big ass. I turned to see what he wanted and he said, “Don't take too long, I have to take a massive dump.” I looked at him with a mix of confusion and disgust. After a few seconds, his friend Joe who was sitting behind him said, “What are you wanting for? You heard him, hurry up!” And with that I left and tried put that weird interaction out of my mind. Why did jocks think that poop and fart jokes are so funny?
My high school was actually a small campus with multiple buildings on it. Of course, given how life works, my locker was in a completely different building than the one my class was in. So, it took me a while to get to my locker, get my homework, and walk back. And let's be honest, I was a senior in high school so it's not like I was exactly in a rush to get back to class. When I did get back to the classroom, I was surprised to see Josh standing outside, almost like he was waiting for me. “I thought I told you not to take too long. You think it's funny for me to me have to sit there and hold it in while I wait for you to get back with the hall pass? You're lucky the teacher’s chill and let me out anyway.” I didn't think I had done anything wrong, but wanting to avoid conflict I apologized anyway. Apparently that wasn't good enough for Josh though because he told me sorry wasn't going to cut it and that he thought I needed to be taught a lesson. He told me to follow him and then grabbed my arm and started leading me down the hallway. I tried to say something but he told me to shut up and said that if I tried to make a scene I'd regret it. He was significantly stronger than me so I figured it was in my best interest to listen.
Finally, Josh pulled me into the bathroom. I was very confused at this point but, before I could ask what was going on, Josh shoved to the ground and forced me to lie on my back on the grimey bathroom floor. I went to sit up and tell him off, but he held me down, spun around, and sat his ass on my face. This made me try to protest even harder (even though my protests were heavily muffled by his ass), but Josh reacted by simply ripping a nasty fart on my face. It smelled absolutely disgusting and made me gag. All of the sudden, I heard the bathroom door open. I started freaking out because I didn't want anyone to see me like this, but it turned out to just be Joe. Based on his reaction, him and Josh both found my current position to be hilarious. “Damn, can't believe we're actually gonna fucking do this to him. It's gonna be so nasty!”, Joe said.
I had no idea what he was talking about, but I wasn't kept in the dark for long. While still sitting on my face, Josh explained their plan: “I was pretty pissed when you took your fucking time coming back with the hall pass after I told you I needed to shit. So, Joe and I got to talking and we decided you needed to learn the error of your ways.” Josh paused for a second, pulled down the back of his shorts and boxers, and slammed his bare ass down on my face. I was caught completely off guard by this and unwittingly took a breath in through my nose. His ass smelled awful. He continued, “Now I'm sure you're already having a rough time down there, but I don't think you realize how much it sucks to be you right now. Ya see, I haven't taken my dump yet and you're in a pretty unfortunate spot. I was originally just planning to shit on your face and leave you to deal with that, but then Joe said it would be even better if I shat in your mouth and made you eat it. I thought that was the most disgusting thing I'd ever heard, but I decided it was too good of an opportunity to pass up on. If we're doing this to teach you a lesson, might as well make sure it sticks. But in all seriousness, there are two reasons we're gonna do this to you. First, it'll be fucking hilarious and will probably scar you for life, and second…because we can.”
I was horrified. There's no way I would let this happen. I started squirming as much as I could to try to get away. They both found this hilarious. I was no match for Josh's body weight though and only succeeded in tiring myself out and making myself sniff Josh's rank ass more. I decided I had to try to scream for help. Unfortunately, that idea ended up working against me. Not only was I not able to get any meaningful noise out from under Josh's ass, but the minute I opened my mouth, he spread his cheeks and firmly pressed has asshole down over my mouth. This resulted in my mouth being locked open by his body weight with my lips sealed around his hole. I felt like my skull was going to crack from the pressure. “Bad move buddy”, Josh said with a laugh. He punctuated that thought with a massive fart that echoed in my mouth. I gagged and started to struggle again. “If you thought that was bad, you're really not going to like what's coming”, he added, ”Hope you're hungry, because I'm about to burst!” Him and Joe started laughing again. He ripped a few more farts into my mouth and I felt like my taste buds were going to burn off. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I began to accept my fate.
Then, it happened, I felt Josh's asshole start to expand. “Here it comes”, he said while grunting. He continued to push and a large turd started to slide into my mouth. Nothing could have prepared me for the taste when it first touched my tongue. It was absolutely rancid - very bitter and slimy with earthy notes as well. I thought I was going to be sick, but Josh kept pushing and next thing I know I felt the log start to slide down my throat. “Look you can see his throat bulging. This is awesome!”, Joe said. He sounded thrilled. As the turd slid further down my throat, Josh and Joey continued to talk and crack jokes at my expense. Meanwhile, I was being completely defiled and the two of them could care less. Finally, after another minute of pushing, the end of the turd came out of Josh's ass. Most of it was already down my throat, but part of it was still in my mouth.
Josh told me to swallow it, because there was more to come. I didn't know if I'd be able to bring myself to do that but then, as if he was reading my mind, Joe told me that if I puked they'd make me eat that too. Seeing no other options, I forced myself to swallow the turd. Josh and Joe were elated by this. Josh continued to take his dump as if I were just a toilet. Apparently he wasn't joking when he said he had to take a massive dump. Over the course of what felt like ten minutes, he forced two more sizable turds down my throat followed by one smaller one. My stomach felt really full with all his shit. Then, to add insult to injury, he told me he wouldn't get up until I licked his asshole clean which resulted in my tongue getting up close and personal with his shit once again. When I finally thought it was over, Josh had one more surprise in store. He told me he was feeling generous and wanted to help wash the taste out of my mouth. He then pulled out his dick, aimed it at my mouth, and told me I better open up if I didn't want to go around smelling like piss the rest of the day. His piss was acrid and unpleasant, but nowhere near as bad as his shit.
Josh finally got up and I just laid there. I couldn't bring myself to move. I was relieved that this ordeal was finally over. That relief was short lived though when I looked up and saw Joe holding his phone with the camera pointing at me. He had filmed the whole thing! They both found it funny how horrified I was. After capturing my reaction Joe put his phone away. I went to sit up and beg him to delete the video, but he pushed me back down. “Who said you're done?”, he asked. “Lunch didn't agree with me today and Josh shouldn't be the only one who gets to have fun. Hope you saved room for dessert!” I started freaking out again, but he was easily able to hold me in place and I eventually ended up with him sitting his bare ass down on my face. I wasn't about to let them put me through that again, so I refused to open my mouth. A swift hit to my nuts took care of that though, and once again I found myself in a familiar position filled with dread.
Like Joe said, whatever he had for lunch was not sitting well with him. This resulted in his dump being a lot less solid than Josh’s. He began with some wet farts before I was presented with a mouthful of mush. The texture alone made me gag and the taste made me wish I didn't have taste buds. After making me swallow that, I was presented with two more mouthfuls that were pretty similar to the first. Joe's “grand finale” really took the cake though and made me regret thinking things couldn't get any worse. His final push filled my mouth to the brim with liquid diarrhea. It almost overflowed, but the seal between his asshole and my mouth was too tight. Realizing what just happened, Joe burst out laughing and then told me not to swallow under threat of Josh standing full weight on my balls. As much as I wanted to get the disgusting liquid out of my mouth, I did as I was told. Joe, then ordered me to swish his shit around like it was mouthwash and really take in the flavor. I didn't want to, but Josh starting to put pressure on my balls with his foot helped persuade me. I hated every second of it until they finally let me swallow. Joe also made me lick his asshole clean, but didn't give me the “courtesy” of rinsing out my mouth with piss like Josh did.
After he stood up, before pulling up his pants, Joe said they should see how good I did at cleaning his asshole. He picked up the homework I had dropped and wiped his ass with it. When he was done, it had a large streak of shit on it. “Whelp, guess someone's getting a zero. Hopefully you'll do a better job next time”, he said. He crumpled up the homework and threw it in the trash. As I got up, I shuddered at the idea of there being a next time. I wanted to run into the nearest stall and puke or at the very least rinse my mouth out with water from the sink, but the two of them where insistent that it was important for me to savor the flavor and fully digest their loads. They made me walk back to class with them and I was surprised that the teacher didn't question the fact that we all came back together or were gone for so long. When asked about my homework, I didn't want to give Josh and Joe an excuse to torture me more, so I just said I couldn't find it.
Fortunately, the two of them actually left me alone for the rest of the school year and never forced me to go through that again. I guess they had their fun and were done with me. They still did manage to get one more blow in though. One night, I got a text from an unknown number telling me that I had been gifted a video from a pay-per-view porn site. I initially thought it was spam, but curiosity got the better of me and I clicked the link. I was completely shocked to see it was the video of Josh using me as a toilet. His face was blurred and his and Joe's voices were altered, but it was still clear exactly what was happening. It was awful seeing myself in that position and having to relive the moment. But the biggest surprise came at the end of the video. When Josh finally got up, my face wasn't blurred and when I begged Joe to stop filming my voice wasn't altered. I felt a pit in my stomach and started to cry. I couldn't believe that this was out there. I looked at the profile that uploaded it and saw they had a second video available for purchase. Based on the thumbnail, I could tell it was my shitty experience with Joe.
All of the sudden, my phone rang. It was the unknown number. Nervously, I picked up. It was Joe. He asked me if I liked the video. I begged him to take both videos down, but he said not a chance. He also told me that if I ever told anyone about what him and Josh did to me, he would make sure everyone I knew saw the videos. He ended the call by telling me that he hopes I never forget the experience and that if I ever wanted to taste his shit again, all I have to do is call. I cried myself to sleep that night. I was glad when graduation came, because it meant that I didn't have to see Josh and Joe every day anymore since I went to a different college than them. But when I was home during breaks, if I ran into either of them while I was out, they would give me knowing grins and brag about how much money they made from the videos they posted. That combined with recurring nightmares in which I was back in that bathroom with them meant that the experience was a constant presence in the back of my mind. I would always remember what had happened and I would never forget the vile taste.
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stargazerdaisy · 7 months
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This week in Random Daisy Health Things:
Got my ADHD referral letter, so now I need to get an appointment with someone to evaluate (read: diagnose) me.
Found out I'm allergic to two new things in my household. Sorry kids, can't use that laundry detergent anymore. And booooo, that handmade candle was so pretty and smelled so nice.
Would very much like new face skin. The acne is The Worst.
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makiswirl · 3 months
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can i just say. and this is probably a niche hill to die on. that i am so gobsmacked every time someone vaguely hints at the idea that jotaro doesn't care meaningfully for the other crusaders, usually particularly kakyoin and joseph, when those two actually tend to be the ones he reacts to being hurt the hardest
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like he cares for his loved ones!!!! that literally plays into his character motives in every single part he shows up in!!! stop lying to me!!!!!!!
#kiki.txt#jjba#i'm going to ramble in tags actually. excuse me#ok. rereading sdc and so confused at the general perception of jotaro and his friends/family. he's not NEARLY as flat or as dickish#i understand that the anime (particularly the dub) tends to slander him but even then he still clearly cares for them! i'm confused#i also understand that a lot of people dig against jotaro and kakyoin as a dynamic because 'they're popular' and that generally disliking#popular things across media is a thing that i've seen consistently everywhere but the discredit to them simply as a DUO and not even as a#pairing is so..... odd..... like they're considered to be a duo that clicks for a reason. i enjoyed them even before i got into the fandom#every time i see someone say jotaro is overrated/dull i take a shot and assume they're an anime-only or only read the manga like once btw#joseph and jotaro also have a neat dynamic and they obviously both love and care for each other. like they're not going to go around loudly#or anything but literally the entirety of the lovers and the prelude to the dio fight IS jotaro being worked up over joseph getting hurt#equally i don't know if it translates to the anime as much but joseph is VERY complimentary when it comes to jotaro. like he sings his#praises so often and reminds everyone that he's his grandson so frequently (d'arby the gamer is a good example of this). either way it's so#peculiar....... there's not enough avdol and jotaro content btw (also in canon) because jotaro obviously looks up to him and avdol jokes#around with him on the occasion they interact after their intro which doesn't start very well. it's very cute#i do think an important thing to note about jotaro's character is how he acts AFTER his intro because he's so drastically different. early#jotaro and later jotaro aren't the same character and i do not mean this in a character development way. excluding the jail incident he's#completely different and probably shouldn't really be taken into account (especially considering the amount of slapstick in araki's intros)#and i think that's really???? what people center on for his character? Which sucks balls bad!#anyways. i could ramble more about this if asked i have so much to say but sigh. jotaro cares so much for his friends and family he's not a#flat fully cold asshole character regardless of whether you watch the anime or ova or read the manga. you just have poor media literacy#i wouldn't recommend watching solely the anime for his character though. the dub also changes a lot so it's... questionable#i love the anime and it's still important for him though. also adds neat stuff. i need to stop myself. i have many thoughts on the matter#jotaro kujo#joseph joestar#noriaki kakyoin#adding in case anyone sees: i am not saying that he is perfect about this. in fact he is very ass about it with jolyne and holly and that's#very important. he also is in fact an asshole sometimes. NOT as much as you guys are making him though!#please don't get me started on how much of a dick etc people make kakyoin to veer away from the 'woobified' characterizations of him#in fact i think that's bad if not worse because it CLAIMS to be in character. hes a prim asshole at times but not that angry or dishevelled
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daily-whistlepaw · 6 months
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daily whistlepaw until ah becomes PoV day 1167
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I think I finally understand how people feel when around a crush, can't say I enjoy it
#warrior cats#whistlepaw#windclan#medicine cat apprentice#this isn't my first crush lol but this one has had me feel the strongest of feelings (and might be my first genuine crush lol)#the fact I have been building up A Lot of stress for the entire week probably didn't help.#and the fact my stomach hurt is also probably at least partially to explain by the fact I barely ate last night#but MAN seeing my (latest) crush in such a pretty dress and then go on stage and play (a goddess!!!!!!! she's a goddess)#(I already bought tickets to go see the full thing; I will die but I will die happy (I hope))#but yeah I struggled for a good 2 hours to fall asleep and also had stomach weirdness happening the next morning#man it was not fun#(and then she came to sit next to me during class and I had to play it cool (I was too deranged on sleep deprivation to really care about#being my typical brand of weird but I do sometimes feel like an idiot around her and feel guilty because then I fear that she finds me#annoying and will hate me and I will fail this again (losing a friendship over a crush once was not that fun lol) and Traumas don't help#either at all so uh I'm just trying to spend time with her I just always feel a bit worried that I'm annoying her and it's consuming my bra#I do also still feel a little guilty about having this crush; internalized homophobia/issues around sexuality are hard to shake off#and while it's very normal and stuff I never dare to go the entire way when my brain conjures fantasies that are a little too risqué#I just feel guilty man I know I shouldn't but still it fucking sucks in my brain#and god talking about this in therapy would be a mess#I might have to eventually but I don't wanna#anyways; wild vent in the tags aside; yay a whis!
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Hrmm... Revising my game and I feel like there's still sooo much writing left to do, for something that probably won't even amount to much, so.. I do want to narrow my focus more (especially given my health problems seeming to get worse/less energy the past few years), but I'm not sure how would be best to...
I currently have 5 characters as the Main ones with full planned questlines and such, with each character having 6 quests you can do for them. But I haven't really started the writing for the 5th main character. So then I was thinking, if I were going to write 6 full quests worth of content anyway... is it better to allocate that time on just doing a Complete 6 Quests for ONE single character, OR would it be better to do something like.. choose THREE side characters and do 2 quests for each of them? So that people have a wider variety to interact with and sort of sample around (of course with the idea that, once the first version of the game is released, IF people actually care about it enough to make it worth the effort, I would then add additional content to complete those 3 characters stories as well)
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SO... If you were playing an interactive fiction sort of game centered around talking to & doing quests for a cast of characters (like there's no larger plot, more it's just about interacting with people, every character kind of has a self contained story, the focus is just learning about them and the world and exploring the area) --- Which would you rather have?
(and of course it would be stated up front which characters have only partial questlines, so people don't expect them to have full quests like the others and then get disappointed, or etc. etc.)
Basically, is it better to just focus in specifically on having one fully complete questline? Or for there to be a few stories that are not complete yet, but have more initial options available?
#I guess I just feel weird about investing too much into characters if possibly nobody will like them. so the idea of being able to sample#around a wider variety opens up the option of like 'hey even if neither of these 4 are your favorite - you have 3 other options soon too!'#or whatever. BUT I also am very anti-the trend of releasing half finished games or shit like that where people preorder and then#the game sucks on actual release and isn't fully playable or good until 5 updates later#HOWEVER.. those are giant companies with hundreds of employees and millions in funding. I feel like it's different for someone#if they're just like ''hey I am getting zero money for this and doing it entirely on my own in my free time and before I do like 50+ hours#of work on top of the 100+ hours of work that I already did - I would like maybe to at least see some proof#people are interested in this - so I'm releasing the game with like a small amount of the originally intended content removed#that I still have planned out and hope to add later and the game is still entirely done and completely functional#except for just a few quests I might add later.. sorry'' etc. etc. ??? like I think that's different. but maybe some people dont see#it that way and would still be like 'grrr.. how dare there be unfinished options..>:V" idk#And the nature of the quests is such that it's not weird to have it be partial like.. again.there's no major plot. it's not like the quests#are leading up to some dramatic thing and having them half done would make it feel like a cliffhanger. It's meant to be very casual just#chilling and doing little tasks and such. And last thing to clarify I guess - by 'side character' I don't mean taking some unimportant bac#ground character and forcing them to have quests. I mean like.. originally the game had 8 full characters and I thought that was#too much so I cut it down to 5. So I still had everything planned for all the side characters too. Id' just be like.. re-giving them#quests and focuses that were already planned from the beginning but that I got rid of.. former main characters banished to the side lol..#ANYWAY... hrmm... hard to decide... It's just so niche I think. I feel more and more like I should just get it to a 'proof#of concept' state and get it out there to interest check rather than invest in it soooo much for nothing. Because I really do not have the#tastes other people do or interact with games or have interest in things in the same way. A lot of the stuff that I love (slow. character#focused things with basicaly no action or plot where its' just about getting to explore a world and learn about#people in a casual low stakes setting but ALSO not romance) I think people find very boring so... lol...#This year as I try to pick the project back up again after abandoning it for like 3 years I keep looking at stuff and going.. ough...#yeah... cut this maybe.. I should cut that too.. I should make them a side character.. remove this.. blah blah..#Though I did ADD a journal and inventory system and other things that like People Expect Games To Have so.. maybe#that will count for something.. hey..you can collect items.. it's not just 'talking to elves for 600 hours simulator'.. are you#entertained yet? lol.... When I was making my other tiny game for that pet website and I gave it to the play testers and someone was like#''it should have achievements so I feel I'm working towards something concrete'' I was literally so blindsided like..??... people WANT that#in games..? is the goal not simply to wander aimlessly &fixate on world/character lore& make your own silly pointless personal goals? I did#do them though because it IS fun to make up little achievement names and such but.. i fear i am out of touch so bad lol..
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pinktinselmonstrosity · 7 months
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GOOD NEWS the expensive pair of jeans i impulse-bought last week (bc my current jeans make me actually angry to wear) don't fit me, so i can return them and get a refund 😊
#on the one hand YES it would be great to have a pair of jeans that fit me#on the other hand i regretted that purchase financially as soon as i made it and i will be v glad to get the money back#WHY DOES NOWHERE MAKE JEANS THAT FIT ME#they're always just too baggy in places and too tight other places like they're usually too big and too small at the same time#and in that situation u can't just get it in a different size bc then it would still fit weird#these ones fit really well around my hips but were just weirdly baggy in the crotch? WHY#also they're always ALWAYS way too long on me but that's ok i can alter the hem length really easily#i guess the real answer would be to learn how to tailor the tops of jeans to fit me properly#i have been seeing some vids recently on pinterest on how to do that and i'll definitely look into it more#because it PISSES ME OFF TO NO END#the current pair i have are just. SO baggy and not in a cute way like they are definitely too big for me#and i guess i have lost a little weight since i bought them but i think probably they never fit right#and i was just so desperate that i settled#also i kind of made a loose resolution that i would only buy second hand or sustainable clothes from now on#and the vast majority of sustainable jeans do not come in sizes big enough for me#it fucking sucks but fast fashion brands really are the only places you can buy decent plus sized jeans#no 'good quality' denim brands eg levi or wrangler make plus sized jeans and you for sure can't find any second-hand#that's why this pair was expensive (bc the brand is sustainable)#i've ordered from them before and i remember having the same problem and having to return everything so i really should have known better#sustainably making clothes that don't fucking fit me lmao#🧃
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dogearedheart · 4 days
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🏞🏞🏞
#the thing is I'm not proud of many things I've done. It's actually the exact opposite.#I kinda suck most of the time if I'm honest. but getting sober and doing it all on my own...#it's one of the only things I'm proud of when it comes to myself. sure.it's my third attempt but 1 year and 3 months...#it's the longest time I've ever managed to not try and deal with myself in a way that slowly but surely fucked me up in a very different way#I still struggle. some days are easier than others#but I'm still doing it.#being sober doesn't magically solve all my other issues but I don't spiral as much as I used to.#i don't think I'll ever be someone people can be around. which is like i don't blame people. i know how i am and how fucking difficult it is#to deal with that. the fear of abandonment that makes me push people away until they leave. the self-fulfilling prophesy of it all#the way i push and when i get the result i was expecting the immediate pull the fear and irrationality#the emotional disreggulation the self-pity#it's gotten better since i stopped drinking. less frequently and all that... but it's never gone not really#sometimes i think about the what could've beens.#what if my childhood went a little differently. what if my dad was there for me when i needed him. what if i wasn't me.#my ex best friend once told me that I'm to desperate to be saved. that nobody can do that anyway.#I'm not sure if I'd deserve it anyway. i have dreams in which I'm still me still dark and ugly and selfish and cruel at times#but i am trying i like to believe that i am already trying. i am. I'm just scared that it'll never be enough.#I'm not proud of many things but I'm 1 year and 3 months sober#only a few days and it's gonna be 1 year and 4 months#i didn't achieve much in my life but I'm here and i am trying every day i am trying and i hope on day it'll be enough#i hope one day i won't cause pain but build something good#sorry... I've just been thinking about it lately#because it is an achievement and i didn’t let myself be proud of how far I've come#alex talks#I'm still scared that people will look at me differently when they know... sometimes i feel like they can see the my rotten core anyway#to delete
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zemnarihah · 6 months
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my best friend has been very distant w me lately and i asked today if she wanted to hang out and she said she probably couldn't bc it's her brothers birthday but she would let me know if she could and i have her location and i just looked and she's at her boyfriends house rn....
#we have it bc we're roomates so we started sharing locations when we first moved in like in case someone doesn't come home at night or smth#she recently told me that she wants to move out bc she has always wanted to live alone and she can finally afford it. and i asked her#directly like is there an issue because she is so non confrontational so she has never ever mentioned me doing anything that bothers her#and i said please tell me if there's something wrong because it would really suck if there was and i never got a chance to fix it because#you never told me. and she said no it has nothing to do with that i really just feel like it's time for me to live on my own. and a couple#days ago she was like okay i'm next in line for my apartment i'll probably move out in april. and i try to get her to hang out still and#she always has something else going on and i swear every night this week she's been at her boyfriends.#and if i see her around our apartment and try to make conversation at all she's so like short about it and barely responds like will only#give one word answers. i feel like it kind of started when i started dating e but i realized that i was spending less time with her and i#didn't want to be the girl that loses all my friends bc of a boyfriend so i started specifically reaching out to hang out with her and she#says no most of the time and never asks me. like i don't know what else i can do.#i'm like maybe it's bc of her boyfriend? bc they've been on again off again for a long time and previously when they were together it was#really distant with her like i barely saw her EVER. and they were mostly broken up for the past couple years and have been together i think#for a while again... but she knows i don't approve of that relationship and so she would like not say when they were talking again. so maybe#since lately they've been hanging out or dating or WHATEVER she doesn't fucking tell me what's going on with him. maybe that's why.#i literally like try to think of ways it could be my fault and maybe i'm being crazy but i cannot even think to blame myself for more than a#fleeting second bc i'm like. i have ASKED HER directly if there is an issue or something i do that bothers her and she says no. so even if#i'm somehow pissing her off would i ever know to change anything?? i just feel so frustrated bc it's like she's an entirely different person#to me. like this is not the person i know. and i don't know what else i could possibly do like i feel like we need to sit down and have a#conversation about it but what good does that do if she just acts like nothing is wrong. but i don't want to lose my friend i have such a#hard time making friends. i've known her since i was 14 like i can't imagine my life without her. we were the only two in our whole friend#group in high school to get out of the church i still love those other girls but we have so little in common now.
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moe-broey · 2 years
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GET HIS ASS FUCKINGB KILL HIM!!!!!!!!!!!
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savage-rhi · 1 year
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I'm very much a, "fuck yeah and fuck you, I don't need validation! I'm me, cunts!" kinda fella, but sometimes I could use support.
#today i fucked up by reactivating my fb account which i haven't done in 2 yrs just to check on some folks id been sending good thought to#place is depressing everyone is miserable and everything feels fake and my mind is like#LOL this is why we left bitch byeeee#so i deactivated again went to work and idc what anyone says there are folks like me that can and do feel the energy and emotions coming of#people and it can fucking suck especially when so many are disregulated so i got a sensory overload and boss was nice enough to let me take#a bunch of breaks today and even scream in her office cause She Gets It (TM)#the weather is rainy and cold i'm getting so many fibro flares idk how i'm moving anymore#ive missed so many days of work already and it's not even fully winter yet i still have my job and im thankful i have an understanding team#but that doesnt pay the bills im still trying to find a way to pay for that doctor appointment coming up#graduate courses began for college and i think i'm gonna be okay but damn did they throw too much info all at once at me and that made#my adhd brain go WELL SHIT#ive been feeling incredibly lonely and not wanted in so many spaces that im struggling to even communicate with the few that i know do#love me for me and nothing else im trying so so so hard to keep being there for people and to keep loving#people that need it cause i don't ever want another human being to ever feel as miserable and unwanted as i have felt#but im also tired because i feel like thats all anyone ever sees me as just this being that can take their woes away and make them feel#amazing and i love that i can do that and listen to so many traumatic stories and help folks process that trauma my boss and many throughou#life have told me i have a gift for healing people and a vibe to me thats different than most and it feels good being around me but today i#just felt like people keep taking and taking and taking and i dont expect anything back thats not who i am id rather give than receive#but damn it i just wish someone could just give me the biggest hug in the world dont even have to say a thing just hold me and be present#and hold space for me to just feel weightless id cherish that more than anything in the world right now#on a positive note...#my dinosaur vo stuff got traction im getting a new cosplay put together i havent done that in 4 years i got to pet a wild deer i made#a coworker laugh so hard his juice went out his nose and my boss peed a little#im slowly taming another wild flock of turkeys and i got a bag of my favorite takis the guacamole flavor#i got a lot to be thankful for and i acknowledge it#but damn it im tired#thank you for coming to my Ted Talk rant and rave#if you made it this far: you're an incredible human being and i love you#please go treat yo self to something nice and know i love you for you
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computer define underdog
#bluebird.txt#google search how to explode my brain with hammers to reset into a functional normal person#how fucking hadd is it to be perfect it's not that hard. you just have to do everything!#but you can never do everything. sometimes you can't even do one fucking thing.#and time moves forward so quickly. go back i didn't do it right. i need to try again. i can be perfect this time i promise.#and i can't but i can and then i can't again but i can't but i can't BUT ITS NOT THAT HARD#HOW HARD COULD IT POSISBLY FUCKING BE!!!!!!#just do it. it's not hard you can just od it. if's not rhat hRd.#JUST FUCKING DO IT#but you can't. even though it's so fucking easy. look at everyone around you doing it and they don't give half as many shits as you do#you're fighting for your fucking life tryi to come out on top and everyone's on too sipping their drinks complaining that it's a little hot#today#what i would give to feel like it was easy. what i constantly give that never feels like enough#but i will say#one of the nicest things anyone ever said to me#was my professor telling me ghat a grad student told her they wished they'd been like me when they were younger#and another two grad students just last week going out of their ways to tell me i did a good job#when that 'good job' felt so shitty i went to the bathroom to suck in my tears bc my day still wasn't fucking over#life is never over it just keeps going and you get up and you get up and you keep going and it's hard and annoying and i'll never be perfec#and i don't think i'll ever- apart from those brief glimpses people give me of what they truly think- ever see myself. i can only ever see#the mirror#or the inside of my eyes#but i'll never see myself as i am#so maybe i don't have to freak oht?#maybe i should just sleep#time to go listen to vienna and cry more maybe#i'm fine. i'm just tired and lazy and tirada en mi cama and can't reach my journal from here. el oh el.#save me help me. i want to feel peace. i can't wait to be older. i can't wait to find my way.#please.
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