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lawva-girl · 3 months

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Historically.. We don't mix. pt. 2

Law x fem!Reader, College AU

Pt. 1

Notes: Sorry i took forever, i kinda forgot i even posted this... HERES PT 2!!! let me know about any ponderances or possibly any errors... i dont have a beta reader or anything.. ALSO i could not come up with a nickname for reader..... so in the chat rooms i put "Y:" for "You". PLEASE tell me suggestions i will go back and fix it :D

WC: 2526

Back at the dorm that Law and Bepo shared, there was no chatter. Law was simply laying in bed with his laptop open to 5 tabs, one for each of the classes he was taking. He was taking all history classes this semester, since his counselor told him to. He would definitely miss the bio information but he did like history. Scrolling through each class, he breezed through all of the syllabus quizzes. Once he felt satisfied, it was onto checking his email, with one catching his attention.

“DIRE!! MAKE AN APPOINTMENT OR TEXT ME ITS EMERGENT!” The email title felt like a scam but he knew it was not, in fact it was a daily burden. The man who had sent it, his counselor and adoptive father, always communicated like this. After opening the email, he found himself irritated again, Cora had only wanted to remind him that classes start today.

“How would I not know?” Law muttered to himself. Reading through the email, then deciding he had been too neglectful of the man Law opened up their chat.

L: I know it was the first day, I got to my first two classes on time. C: Good!!! I miss you! <3 C: Any new friends?! C: Do you like your professors?? I hand picked them :D L: Hand picked? You are making me socialize on purpose. C: Not true! Nico Robin is the smartest! She already had her masters by the time most have an associates! L: The classes are fine. Bepo made a friend, her name is Perona. C: Oh! Mihawk’s kid! Good to know she’s here! Is his step-daughter here too? Maybe y/n? L: Yes. C: Oh! I heard she’s similar to you! Maybe you two can be friends or something? L: How long did you have to think to come up with this plan of yours? C: No idea what you are talking about…. L: Cora. C: … C: Anyways, have you gotten all the textbooks you need? C: I want to make sure you find them all! C: It's my job, you know. L: I still have two more classes to go to tomorrow, but i’ll be fine. L: Thanks. C: Anything for you! We should meet for lunch soon! I can make you salmon rice balls! Like when you were still a baby… remember? You loved my cooking! L: I did not. You should not be in a kitchen alone, Ill meet you on friday at 11. L: Don’t start until i'm there. Please. C: Okay !!!!! C: I'll see you then law! C: Cant wait ! C: Sleep tight <3<3<3

Law closed his laptop, relaxing his shoulders. He glanced over and Bepo was already asleep. He kicked off his blanket and got up to go to the bathroom. After he finished his business, washing his hands like any good bio major, he strolled to the microwave area. He had only wanted water but he saw the picture of him holding a letter, standing next to Cora. Staring at it, he wondered why the giant had wanted him to socialize so much. It’s not like he never sees human faces, or stays inside all day everyday. He just liked being alone when he could, no one to ask him stupid questions.

After finishing his water, Law went back to bed.

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The two went through the rest of the week, meeting each other an embarrassing amount of times. Neither one had any reason to talk to the other, so they didn’t. Until Wednesday rolled around, and they were back in Nico Robin’s class.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Someone has it out for me. I know it for sure” You wrote in your journal, along with the date and class name. Looking at Law, like you had these past two days, made you realize it more.

“I have pissed off whatever god actually exists and they want me to repent. There is no way that all four of my classes are naturally shared with Trafalgar.” You finish scribbling away in your journal, just in time.

“Okay, pass forward the paper I handed out to you. This was just a fun assignment to see what areas we, as a class, are most interested in.” She spoke smoothly, with an even tone. It was almost like she didn’t care, or like she had done this 20 times.

You heard some of your classmates groan and while you agreed, you thought it was inappropriate to voice that. Tapping a pen on the paper of your journal idly, you waited for more instructions. Even though your classmates weren't raised well, your father had done a fine job with you. You were nice, respectful, studious. Sure you are shy but it's not like it mattered.

Why speak to people and risk being embarrassed if they don’t want to talk to you?

“Okay, as I said before this class is based in groups and communication. Please tell one person about what you studied for this assignment.” Robin had said before sitting at her desk with a book in hand.

Suddenly everyone was talking but you and one other person.

“My assignment is on the Five years war. I chose it because of a coin flip, I found the sources in the library database.” Already you were irritated. Another interaction with the man who had no manners.

“Hello. That is how you start a conversation, who raised you? Anyways, my assignment is on the First Crusade. I chose it because it was the first war I thought of-” “Really? The first? Liar.” He interrupted you, of course a man like him would.

You squinted at him, before responding with “Not lying, I was watching a documentary on the pope a day before class, which made me think of all the holy wars. It's not polite to interrupt people.”

“Okay. I think we have discussed enough.” “Fine.” You scoffed at him mentally, before turning back to face the front of the room.

“Okay now, I want someone to tell me about their partner's work! This is worth participation, as a friendly reminder.” She smiled eerily

You did not raise your hand, in fact you looked away. If you were called on you would end up having to lie, since stupid Trafalgar didn’t tell you anything about his assignment.

“Okay, randomly generated, we will have Mr. Trafalgar, Mr. Reyes, and Ms. Churchill. In that order please.” “My partner researched the First Crusade, she told me that she learned about the context of the war. Specifically Pope Urban the second’s motivations for launching the crusade, who was mainly following the lead of the Byzantine emperor. She also learned about the cost of the war, not only economically but also what it did for the Pope’s approval rating.” Incredible. He pulled all that from his ass? Wasn’t he a double major? How long ago did he even learn that? How was he able to say it so confidently? He is actually smart?! Hold on, he could’ve seen the same documentary you did and just so happened to remember important stuff. But even then, he didn’t even hesitate, he was so confident, even with a professor like Nico Robin.

“Very good, point earned. Mr. Reyes?”

As he relaxed into his chair, you couldn’t help but stare. His hair was sticking out, a bit unruly from his beanie. It was white with weird black spots on it, maybe a statement about faux animal fur? Could he be vegetarian or something? Maybe he likes to hunt? His sideburns went right into his weird facial hair, “should be shaved” was scribbled into your journal, along with “spots?” and of course “T is smart?”. You saw his black hair under his beanie and thought of your father, who would never slouch like the man in front of you was.

“Okay good to hear. This wraps up our class for today, I’ll see you all on monday.”

You started gathering your things, excited to go back to Perona. She promised she would have your favorite food ready for you as soon as your class ended. It was a little weird, but you two always were close.

“Are you always the last to leave?” The sudden voice pulled you from your thoughts, and made you drop your pencil case. No pencils escaped but the case clunked right under whoever had just shocked you. Law, with no expression on his face, immediately thought of his giant adoptive father; who was extremely clumsy.

“No. Are you stalking me? I feel like the campus police or a trusted adult should know about this.” You looked up at him, not reaching for your case at all.

“I’m not, somehow, we have the exact same class schedule. With the exception of my online class.” “That's crazy buddy… Will you grab my case?”

“You can’t get it yourself?” He scoffed and folded his arms.

“I think the reason why I dropped it should be the one to get it for me, no?” You thought he looked childish, folding his arms like he just got told to go to his room.

“Fine.” He reached down, grabbing the case and placing it on your desk, “even though you were closer to the floor… I'm sorry.” He looked away as he said it. Once again you thought he was childish.

You found yourself staring again. This time you noticed his hands, the word ‘death’ tattooed on his fingers, and the heart on the back of his hand. Shocked to say the least.

“Holy shit.” Huh? You said that outloud? Maybe you weren’t nice.

You looked up to see Law’s face, somewhere between shock and disgust.

“Oh uh.. I meant, holy shit your tattoos are cool. They look like they hurt.” Maybe you saved it, you really did mean it in admiration.

“It was painful, but worth it. Bearable at times.” He looked at his hand and held it up between the two of you. Shocked that he held it up for display, you raised your eyebrows. Staring at the tattoo, you were about to reach out and hold his hand closer so you could get a better look at the line work. Then your thoughts were interrupted.

“I know we aren’t on the best terms, but you heard the professor. I think it would be a good idea to bite the bullet and partner up.” He said it so matter-of-factly you almost agreed without realizing you were lost.

“Huh? Partner?” you blinked up at him. “Of course you weren’t paying attention. The collaborative presentation that you and another student must present on the 18th?” He sounded annoyed, but his face wasn’t telling.

“Yes! Sorry I got lost in my thoughts, we might as well partner up. I don’t have anyone else in mind, so I can stick with you.” You finished packing, finally, and stood up. Swinging your bag onto your back, you held out your hand towards him.

“Okay… What is that for?” He nodded down to your hand.

“Give me your phone. I’ll put my email in. We can make a google slide and share it that way.”

He paused, with a semi frown on his face then gave up. He put his phone in your hand, and watched intently as you typed in something. Then you returned his phone, much to his delight.

“Bye then. Just do 5 slides on the First Crusade or whatever other war the pope has started.” He put both of his hands in his pocket as he casually strolled out, leaving you to the room.

“Hey! We should at least pretend you won't be a dick this whole time! Don’t boss me around!” You realized that you had said that just a bit too loud for the circumstances. Maybe you weren’t nice.

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Y: Okay! I just left class, do you have my salmon nigiri? Y: You won't believe how good I was today. P: WHST P: who are you? P: The y/n i know would never ever say that. P: Yes i do have it ready :) Y: I had to partner up with Him :/ Y: The strength Y: Also he has finger tattoos? Y: What the fuck. P: You didn’t see them before? Y: Sir traffy has been through it P: I wonder if hes like some ex-gang member? P: That is such a gang member thing to get tattooed P: Why aren’t you responding? P: Helllllooooooo P: y/n P: y/n P: ….

“Rona! You are literally crazy. I was walking over here, that's why I wasn’t responding.” You closed the door behind you, making sure to lock it.

“Anyways! I’ve never seen you have such a strong reaction! To a guy no less, did he like to recite everything in the declaration of independence?” Perona called out to you while you entered and took off your shoes.

You walked over to the kitchen, where she wasdoing some dishes. Tossing your bag on the couch, then taking a seat at the bar that was connected to the kitchen. “If he did that I would’ve proposed on the spot… He just is kinda smart? It’s freaky! One second he’s brushing me off and not wanting to talk to me at all, the next he's explaining the cause of the First Crusade? Well… Kinda.” Perona turned with two plates in hand, and took a seat next to you. She placed the plate of sushi in front of you, “Well honestly i'm not surprised… Bepo says he is always studying.”

“You talk about him with Bepo? Perona…” you made a disappointed face at her as you pulled your plate closer to you. “Noooo it’s all kosher! Bepo just offers up info about everyone he knows. I think he just doesn’t have a filter or whatever.”

“Yeah…” you took a piece of nigiri and dipped it, then ate it. As you chewed and swallowed you thought of your dad, “Do you think your dad would come visit us here?”

“Hmmm only if your dad forced him to. I can picture it now ‘don’t you miss our girls?’ ‘Yes.’ ‘Then lets go! You pay and ill bring the beer!’ ‘beer isn’t allowed on a plane shanks’ or something like that…” Perona tried her best but didn’t really get the overall attitude of your dads. You decided not to comment and just take another bite.

“Do I get to know why you asked?” Perona said, food in her mouth.

“Traffy, as you call him, has hair as dark as Mihawk’s. It made me think of him today…”

“Sigmund Frued would have a lot to say to you right now.” “No he wouldn't, he’s dead.”

“Not for long…” “What the fuck?” You both burst out in laughter at the same time, something you had only ever done with your sister.

After dinner it was off to bed, except you weren’t actually sleeping. Your laptop was open on your lap, on the google slides page. The document was created, named, and shared to Traffy. It wasn’t the most well-mannered thing, but you decided that nicknames meant you’re friends. Your sister desperately wanted you to have friends, and this would make her think you had them. You didn’t like the deception, if you could call it that, but it's not like you were gonna go out and get real friends.

You started typing away, filling out 3 slides with information and pictures before deciding to get actual sleep.

#trafalgar law x reader #law x reader #one piece x reader #law x y/n #reader insert #trafalgar d law x reader #trafalgar law #one piece #law #college AU

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kisbunzies · 11 months

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More silly tf2 headcanons because i know more about them than valve does.

Sniper is practically nocturnal. You wont see him all day but you will find him sitting on the couch in base with snacks and a movie going like it 3am , no shoes or shirt despite it being February and his camper being parked like a mile.away acting like its totally normal. Will literally nap anywhere during the after noon dont be surprised if one day you find him hanging upside down like a vampire.

Speaking of which this mans goes everywhere shirtless and shoeless . gas station ? Shirtless and shoe less . walmart ? Shirtless and shoeless .middle of winter ? Maybe he's got socks on. They have to yell at him to get dressed or atleast put on sunscreen so he doesn't get crustier than he already is.

Pyro's really good at open flame cooking , bonfire grill gas stove flambae torch they can make anything as long as it requires fire. Also pyros mexican and atleast half of their "strange noises" are just them mumbling to themselves in spanish.

Heavy likes cozy stuff , he's struggled enough if he wants hot cocoa and a knitted blanket he can have hot cocoa and a knitted blanket. Owns the fuzziest pair of bear slippers known to man. Also i feel like he's a salmon guy idk maybe he rlly is just a bear but guy.

Saxton hale likes men.

Scout if so painfully straight. And i dont mean straight as in sexuality i mean straight as in pure fucking aura. Ms pauling comes out as a lesbian and he says "oh shit i like girls too we should date" sees heavy and medic kiss and his brain doesn't acknowledge it. This is true even is scout likes dudes he's the 1970's equivalent of those guys nowadays who wear nothing but nike and use the word gyat unironically and im tired of pretending like he isn't.

Ms pauling wants to be a merc so bad she thinks that its so cool but her mom told her murders for boys so she's just the administrators assistant/hj

Demoman has the most curly , bouncy , volumous gorgeous hair under than beanie. He keeps it in cornrows most of the time but when he does wear his hair out its a sight to behold.

Engineer makes the corniest , most dad like jokes known to man , its literally horrible they all groan so loud whenever he does but he thinks its hilarious.

Sniper , scout , pyro and soldier are all sour gummy worm addicts to the point that their stash takes up and entire shelf in the base pantry. Go through a costco bag a week.

The local costco dreads their presence , engineer and sniper and in the outdoors section, medics necromancing the chickens , pyros was the one roasting those chickens before they got necromanced, they managed to lose heavy somehow , scout managed to convince spy to get into a toilet paper fort they made and now their introuble with management, soldiers ordering a forth of july cake despite it being october and demomans buying premade meal kits for dinner for him.and his mom over the week. Pyro saved him a necromanced rotisserie chicken. And yes sniper still isn't wearing a shirt or shoes they've given up.

Spy had eyebags and grey hair , misses when was young and spry , is a little jealous of medic managing to have a full head of dark hair.

Medics ethnically jewish. He gets his black market organs kosher .

And finally out of all the mercs soldier goes to.medic the most for actual injuries , scout goes the most for.minors , engineers got the most perscriptions including hearing aids and stuff for pyro he picks up , sniper never goes to the doctor and medic has to drag him in . spies the worse when it comes to appointments (doesn't like any part of him being seen and despit having spy training still doesn't like.needles) and medic favorite patient is heavy for obvious reasons

#tf2 #tf2 engineer #scout tf2 #spy tf2 #demoman tf2 #tf2 scout #engineer tf2 #heavy tf2 #medic tf2 #pyro tf2 #sniper tf2 #tf2 headcanons #headcanon #lake's rambles

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ashton-sano · 1 year

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Food Wars! Shokugeki no Souma in: Going Grocery Shopping

(Char. Involved: Sōma Yukihira, Akira Hayama, Takumi Aldini, Eishi Tsukasa)

(Thank you so much for 40 notes! Here's another one for you guys. Sorry i couldn't do a short story for these but take some headcanons my dears.)

Sōma Yukihira

-Usually you cant take him anywhere because he causes an issue in which you have to be asked to leave (much to your despair)

-The grocery store is probably the only place you two can go without much problems

-May or may not be sneaking ingredients that werent on your list into the shopping cart

"Oh? What do you mean there werent any Rice crackers and Salmon in the cart before? I'm certain you put them in."

-Will asked to be pushed in the cart around the aisles

-If he ever gets lost, find him in the Frozen Dessert aisle, he loves it there for whatever reason

"C'mon Babeeee. Just one more tub of Ice cream.....Yes i know we already have 4 tubs already. Your point is?"

-However if you were shopping for a food war/cooking practice, he'd be very helpful

-Recommending ingredients, telling you the best flavor combinations from his experience, and slipping in a few personal items

-Overall, hes a massive child in the store so please hold his hand so he doesn't run off

Akira Hayama

-A rollercoaster of emotions

-Its like stepping into a whole other world when you food shop with him

-He tends to find the items in the store "Sub par" and "Second rate" but always picks the best ones with his well trained sense of smell

"Why bother buying from these cheap stores when i have fresh spices and blends at home?"

-He'd swear he hates shopping with you but secretly enjoys the time he spends with you (Good luck getting him to admit it though)

-May subtly tease and feign ignorance when you need help reaching something at a higher shelf

"Hm? Cant you reach it on your own from down there?” -pause- “Whats that look on your face for?"

-On rare occasions, he'll hold your hand when you go together

-He swears its just so that you dont get lost but you know better

-To be honest, its just less of a arduous task if you just go by yourself

Takumi Aldini

-One of the most normal ones on this list if we're being honest

-Its just a calming and sweet time through and through

-He's usually the one to ask you to go with him but will flush when you ask why

"Dont be silly, I just thought you'd want to pick up some things for your upcoming food war, thats all."

-Will never leave you on your own in the store since he loves spending time with you more than he'll admit (his face gives him away)

-He'll push the cart and carry your bags like a gentleman

"How could you even say that, Il mio amore? As if id let you carry them when you already paid."

-An absolute god at picking vegatables for some reason

-His background in the restaurant business definitely plays a part

-In the top 3 (And not three) guys you should always bring when you're shopping

(New!) Eishi Tsukasa

-A walking beige flag when it comes to shopping

-You either love it or want to rip every single hair from your body with tweezers

-Hes not loud or causing a disturbance but hes micro managing and nitpickjng everything

"Thats the one you chose?" "Uhp, I wouldnt go with that one."

-Its better to just let him do everything because he'll make you feel stupid no matter what move you make (even though thats not his intention)

-He means well but lets be honest, you just arent on the same page very often in terms of shopping

"I apologize dear but you know im particular. I dont mean to hover."

-If you have no filter and tell him to cut it out, he'll immeidiently draw back into himself at your blantant rejection

-His more awkward side will show and he will mumble endless strings of apologies

-Just be ready to put up with this weird snowflake

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bridgyrose · 3 months

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Weiss sat down and wiped away a little sweat from her brow. “You both can go. Its still a bit too warm for me to go out right now. Just… dont be out too long, alright?”

“We’ll be back soon,” Penny answered as she followed Ruby out the door.

Weiss smiled a bit as the door shut, standing up and rushing to the kitchen. Knowing Ruby, she’d be out for a walk with Penny long enough for cookies to be baked, but she needed more than that. Today, she was ready to take a step she’d been too nervous to take before and she needed everything to be perfect.

And to start, she needed to make sure dinner was ready by the time the two came back. Or at least ready enough for Ruby to sit down and focus on something other than her next mission or weapon maintenance. And to start: a meal she could look forward to.

Weiss scrambled around the kitchen to look for Ruby’s cookbook, nearly causing a few glasses to fall out of the cupboard. Once she found it, she flipped to the page for the strawberry cookies that Ruby liked and searched for all the ingredients she needed. And while she wasnt too familiar with baking, she at least knew enough from watching Ruby that it was a science and that as long as she followed the instructions, she would be fine.

She set the oven to preheat and mixed the ingredients into two bowls, separating the dry and wet ingredients as instructed. Once she was sure she hadnt been missing anything, she mixed the two together and waited for the oven to finish preheating.

Weiss once again found herself flipping through cookbook pages, looking for anything that resembled a main course. Cookies, tarts, brownies… enough sweet recipes to fill a bakery lined each page as she continued to look through. Finally, she came across a page that was torn and crusted with some old batter along the edges.

A smile crossed her lips as she spoke to herself. “Fried fish? I think I can handle this.”

She started by getting a pot on the stove, filling it with a cup of oil and let it heat up to 425 degrees. Then, she looked through the fridge for the salmon that Ruby had come back with a few days previous, relaxing when she found it still wrapped up in newspaper from the market.

Weiss then placed it on the counter and paused when she read the next step. Filet fish. She quickly pulled out her scroll, not quite sure what the recipe wanted her to do. After watching several videos, she found a knife that looked like the fish knife the videos used. She placed a hand on the fish and slowly and carefully cut through it to try to mimic how the videos showed her how to filet a fish. Though, it didnt take long for her to lose control of the knife and cut the fish unevenly. She sighed and tried to salvage as much as she could, putting chunks of fish onto a cutting board and doing her best to make them as even as possible.

Next came the batter. She added a couple cups of flour, a teaspoon of sugar, and a pinch of salt into a bowl and mixed. Next was to add twelve ounces of beer. It took her a little longer than she cared to admit with finding the beer, almost mistaking it for soda.

Once the beer was mixed in, she took chunks of the fish and added them into the batter, making sure every piece was well covered before tossing it into the hot oil. The oven went off and she nearly dropped a piece of battered fish on the ground, not expecting the chime to be so loud. Still, she finished putting the fish into the hot oil and started to get the cookies into the oven.

As everything started to cook, Weiss flipped through the cookbook again, slowing down as she passed through a few of the recipes. It was almost like she was catching a better glimpse into the woman she loved, who Ruby was outside of huntressing. A blush crossed her cheeks at the thought of calling Ruby someone she loved. Still, this was the step that she wanted to take. And she knew that Penny felt the same about Ruby and wanted her in their relationship just as much.

She smiled as she started to smell the fish, turning them in the oil with a pair of chopsticks to make sure the fish cooked evenly. Then, she started some rice and vegetables to have along with the fish, wanting to make sure she had a full meal ready.

“We’re back,” Ruby called out as she walked back into the apartment. “And the fish smells good.”

“I hope it tastes as good as it looks,” Weiss said as she finished getting the rice cooking. “Would you like to help? Its my first time doing any of this and I’m still not quite sure what I’m doing.”

Penny smiled and pushed Ruby forward a bit. “Go on, maybe it will give you something to talk about.”

“S-sure,” Ruby said with a blush as she made her way to the kitchen. “What would you like me to do?”

“Could you keep an eye on the fish?” Weiss relaxed a bit as she checked on the cookies by opening the oven door, only to stop when she felt Ruby’s hand on hers. “I’m just checking on them.”

“Its better to check while the door’s closed. There’s a light you can turn on to see into the oven.”

Weiss blushed a bit as she felt Ruby press up against her to turn on the oven light. “You know, I could get used to this.”

“Used to this?” Ruby asked.

“You helping me cook and… being here with me.” Weiss took Ruby’s hand for a moment and smiled at her. “You’ve been close to Penny and I for a while now and… we’d like for you to be with us.”

“If you are willing to,” Penny chimed in.

Ruby slowly nodded. “I’d… I’d like it.”

Weiss blushed and gently leaned against Ruby. “Then maybe we can make this our first dinner date.”

“As long as you dont let me burn the food,” Ruby said as she started to spoon the fish out of the oil. “The fish are done.”

“Right.” Weiss turned the oven light off and started to focus on the rice and veggies, taking a few glances at Ruby. “But with you here, I’m sure everything will be perfect.”

#rwby #ruby rose #rwby ruby rose #weiss schnee #penny polendina #drabbles #frosen steel #ruby x weiss x penny

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definitelynotshouting · 5 months

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The salmon swam in a slow, lazy circle.

It would drift up, close to the shoreline, then turn, and batter once more against the world border. Sand and seagrass would stir in its wake, before settling, and the cycle would begin anew.

Grian could do nothing but watch it.

Wasn’t much else to do.

Up, shoreline, down, border.

It seemed cruel, to let this happen. To watch this salmon swim in its tiny pool of water- trapped in a loop it can’t escape.

It had been just upstream, a few days ago. It had hovered just outside the world border, before slipping inside- seemingly without even realising what it was getting itself into.

Without even realising it had doomed itself, with that one, fatal mistake.

The salmon suddenly switched, changed its path, and started looping in the opposite direction.

Down, border, up, shoreline.

Maybe it’s lonely. It’s been stuck in that section of the pool for a while, after all. Alone.

Maybe it’s hungry. Grian can’t imagine there’s much in the way of food down there. Yesterday, he gave it some bread crumbs. He only has two loaves left, now- acacia biomes never had the best land for farming.

Maybe it’s scared of Grian. He had been watching it for a good few hours today. He would be scared, too, in its place. Confused. Bewildered. Overwhelmed. Panicked.

Because it was so free, just a couple days ago. It could swim as far as it wanted up and down the riverbank, with all of its fishy friends. Now it was trapped. Alone.

Naïve little fish.

Has it even realised that its freedom is gone? That now it’s stuck here- forever powerless, under the scrutiny of a creature that won’t give it pity?

Has it even realised that despite all of its suffering, it will never gain anything?

…

Grian does not bother naming the salmon. In a few days, he will run out of bread, and the wheat will not have grown.

The salmon will be cooked crudely in a furnace, with sticks used as fuel- and Grian will ration its remains until the next crop harvest.

Then he’ll ration those crops until the next poor victim wanders in.

And then the cycle will begin anew.

///

uhh same anon as the one that sent in that other snippet (minecraft soundtrack headcanon). assuming i actually remembered to send in the other one.

i dont know?? what i ate?? to write this?? like am i cooking or is it just almost 1am and i need to Go To Bed.

in my mind the parrallels and forshadowing and implications are all on a corkboard being tied together with red string. the dots, ive connected them. its been salmon all along

THIS HITS ANON I TRULY LOVE THESE SNIPPETS.... insanely flattered to be receiving them for hunger au 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 it really is all about those repeating cycles, huh. Smth smth the cycle of not only violence but also loneliness and isolation. And theres something so haunting about the idea that his hunger started even before he became a Watcher

#shouting speaks #asks #hunger au #fic for me #OHOHO SO GOOD #I LOVE ITTTTT #grian #hermitcraft #evo smp #evo watchers #fic recs #txt

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nerdyneko265 · 3 months

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In honour of the last dungeon meshi Thursday (I know it’s Wednesday, shut up)

Minecraft cooking!

Where I go through the mob bestiary and treat it like a cook book.

Chicken, cow, pig, goat, rabbit, horse, wolf, sheep, cat, cod, salmon, tropical fish, llama- you know what these are, you don’t need me to explain. Both Laios and I are bored, moving on.

Villagers, pillagers, piglins- don’t eat people. I know piglins are half pig but listen. DONT EAT PEOPLE! You know the orcs? This is the same thing.

All zombies ever- technically edible. We’ve all eaten rotten flesh. Senshi would not be proud of us, it’s not very nutritious. Also, cannibalism.

Skeletons- I guess you could make a soup stock. But they’re better for fertilizer.

Vex and allays- ghosts. I don’t think we can make sorbet here either. I don’t think they work like that.

Bats- very small, not much meat. Hard to find and catch. But if you’re in a cave and in a pinch or just curious, sure why not

Puffer fish- cook very carefully. Probably just better for potions. But you can eat puffer fish, your chef just needs to be trained in how to cook it.

Mooshroom- now we’re talking. Beef, but with mushrooms. Comes with mushroom soup too. Usually raised for soup rather than meat, but still a good source of meat that’s pre seasoned.

Squid- mmmmm calamari… Laios enemy… also good for squid ink. I hear it goes well with pasta.

Cave Spider- venomous, could technically remove the poison like with puffer fish and boil the spider but I dont know. Small but have spawners, so you’ve have a steady supply

Spider- not venomous, and bigger. So I guess you could. Probably taste like giant scorpion since they’re both arachnids.

*dont eat spider eyes, they’re poisonous

Endermen- for personal reasons, I will not be eating endermen. They don’t even want to fight unless you antagonize them. More importantly, don’t eat endermen, it’ll probably fuck you up. They’re built for the end and full of chorus fruit. They’re also so skinny, not much to eat there. Ender pearls have a chance of giving you a parasite. And will probably teleport your stomach out of your body. You could try but it’s probably like jerky and you’ll see god.

Incidentally, I think chorus fruit tastes like vanilla

Polar bear- probably very tough meat. Very gamey. Beware though, they eat people too

Iron golem- that’s a robot. Don’t eat metal. DONT EAT REDSTONE! ITS RADIO ACTIVE.

Snow golem- probably makes good ice cream. Don’t eat it. Let it make ice cream. It’s just snow after all. It would just taste like water.

Blaze- it’s more of a spirit than an animal. Good for potion making, probably not tasty. A central core surrounded by rods, maybe that core has some meat on it, probably tastes a little spicy.

Striders- why? Why would you eat these poor babies? What did they ever do to you? They’re probably reptiles, so you could definitely eat them but could you live with that knowledge?

Elder guardian- really old puffer fish. Cut carefully for good sushi. But it’s such a hassel, you’re better off having a puffer fish. Plus, they’re endangered, so like, come on.

Guardian- jokes on you, it’s hollow on the inside. Check the mob bestiary, they have no internal organs. Could probably get some meat from the outer flesh but that’s also the spikes, so beware.

Ender mite- remember those parasites from ender pearls? This is them. Could def cook them though. They’re fair sized and full on meat. You’re probably be tripping balls though.

Ghast- like a squid, but balloon. They are filled with gas, to allow them to fly. So much like a dragon, likely have a gas sac that could contain gases that could ignite, be careful. But sky octopus. Lots of meat.

Magma cube- slime but spicy. Magma cream is probably yummy. We know it’s ok to ingest because it’s in potions, so I think it should be ok to eat. Just wait got it to cool a little

Slime- senshi has recipes for these buggers.

Shulker- I can only assume it tastes like living armour. It’s definitely a mussel

Silverfish- it’s a bug, it’s big, enjoy.

Wither skeleton and the wither- please, for the love of all that is holy, DO NOT EAT THE WITHER! THIS IS HOW WE GET THE PLAGUE! YOURE GOING TO GET WITHERING AND DIE!

Sniffer- I know they’re really big, I know they’re probably full of meat and they have eggs, but look at their little faces. Could you really eat them?

The Ender dragon- I mean, you beat her, might as well I guess. Apparently dragon is delicious. But also, probably full of the end, probably going to fuck yup up a bit

And now, for the big one

Creeper- as we all know, creeper skin feels like dry, crunchy leaves. It’s a moss monster with a tnt block inside. So, if you carefully cut around the explosive, you now have a very dangerous vegetable. Thick “meat”, might make a good salad.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk

#ignore the neko #Minecraft #had a thought and had to rant for a while #the redstone bit is specifically for etho and mumbo #dungeon meshi #sort of

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