Tumgik
#i found most of them but the videos for the first 3 just Do Not work
gibbearish · 4 months
Text
btw its interesting the way james tries to imply that like. well the videos that have plagiarism are the ones our dumb stupid annoying patrons requested about bad topics that didnt deserve to have the effort put in to covering them well so basically its fine. like obv thats interesting on its own but moreso the fact that he doesnt actually /say/ it, or like. give a list of the videos hes referring to, just says "those videos are very clear on which ones they were" i think as a nod meaning like "yknow the ones everyones talking about". unless what hes meaning is that like they put a note in certain videos saying "this video was requested by a patron, we here at james somertom incorporated do not espouse these views" which seems unlikely to me. idk methinks maybe it's because there is indeed a lot more than people think and with all the buzz he's not sure which ones have been discovered yet or not, so putting down a solid list that missed some would look like he was still hiding things whereas putting down a fully sourced list would be admitting to wayyyy more than anyone's found yet
#which is ironic too bc if he genuinely did want to prove he understood what he did wrong and that hed changed thatd be the way to do it#yknow like a full list of every single source including ones no one has found on their own or /can/ find anymore would a) be taking full#responsibility and b) make people less likely to always be like 'youre still hiding something'#which in turn makes me super think hes still hiding a lot of somethings#also cant go without stating that the 'request a video topic' thing was only for $100/month patrons after 3 months on that tier#like fucker these people gave you THREE HUNDRED DOLLARS AT LEAST and youre trying to blame it on them??????#no one forced you to make 'let patrons pick video topics' a reward dude like. hello????????#shit dude even hbombs highest tier ($10 for anyone wondering bc he doesnt see his audience as a money machine lmao)#just says you can vote in polls about future topics#like that makes complete sense to me as a version of this‚ the most dedicated audience members get a say in the future of the#channel while the creator still gets overall control of the direction#also 'patrons who gave me fuckloads of money asked me to make videos on topics i didnt like so i plagiarized those' is i think uhhh#worse than just 'i plagiarize everything without remorse' frankly?#like at least with the second youre just a general shitbag but the first where youre a shitbag specifically to the people#majorly financially supporting you rather than just like. be an adult and say 'hm i dont feel like that topic really works for the channel‚#do you have any other ideas?'#or dare i say even perhaps yknow. doing what other youtubers do in similar situations and find ways to tie that subject#to what they usually talk about is just. wild#course that last one would take actual creativity and aint that just the crux of the issue#james somerton#or i say cannot go without stating i should say cannot go without restating kwnrkabdkwbrn
21 notes · View notes
yeoldenews · 3 months
Text
A Guide to Historically Accurate Regency-Era Names
Tumblr media
I recently received a message from a historical romance writer asking if I knew any good resources for finding historically accurate Regency-era names for their characters.
Not knowing any off the top of my head, I dug around online a bit and found there really isn’t much out there. The vast majority of search results were Buzzfeed-style listicles which range from accurate-adjacent to really, really, really bad.
I did find a few blog posts with fairly decent name lists, but noticed that even these have very little indication as to each name’s relative popularity as those statistical breakdowns really don't exist.
I began writing up a response with this information, but then I (being a research addict who was currently snowed in after a blizzard) thought hey - if there aren’t any good resources out there why not make one myself?
As I lacked any compiled data to work from, I had to do my own data wrangling on this project. Due to this fact, I limited the scope to what I thought would be the most useful for writers who focus on this era, namely - people of a marriageable age living in the wealthiest areas of London.
So with this in mind - I went through period records and compiled the names of 25,000 couples who were married in the City of Westminster (which includes Mayfair, St. James and Hyde Park) between 1804 to 1821.
So let’s see what all that data tells us…
To begin - I think it’s hard for us in the modern world with our wide and varied abundance of first names to conceive of just how POPULAR popular names of the past were.
If you were to take a modern sample of 25-year-old (born in 1998) American women, the most common name would be Emily with 1.35% of the total population. If you were to add the next four most popular names (Hannah, Samantha, Sarah and Ashley) these top five names would bring you to 5.5% of the total population. (source: Social Security Administration)
If you were to do the same survey in Regency London - the most common name would be Mary with 19.2% of the population. Add the next four most popular names (Elizabeth, Ann, Sarah and Jane) and with just 5 names you would have covered 62% of all women.
To hit 62% of the population in the modern survey it would take the top 400 names.
The top five Regency men’s names (John, William, Thomas, James and George) have nearly identical statistics as the women’s names.
I struggled for the better part of a week with how to present my findings, as a big list in alphabetical order really fails to get across the popularity factor and also isn’t the most tumblr-compatible format. And then my YouTube homepage recommended a random video of someone ranking all the books they’d read last year - and so I present…
The Regency Name Popularity Tier List
The Tiers
S+ - 10% of the population or greater. There is no modern equivalent to this level of popularity. 52% of the population had one of these 7 names.
S - 2-10%. There is still no modern equivalent to this level of popularity. Names in this percentage range in the past have included Mary and William in the 1880s and Jennifer in the late 1970s (topped out at 4%).
A - 1-2%. The top five modern names usually fall in this range. Kids with these names would probably include their last initial in class to avoid confusion. (1998 examples: Emily, Sarah, Ashley, Michael, Christopher, Brandon.)
B - .3-1%. Very common names. Would fall in the top 50 modern names. You would most likely know at least 1 person with these names. (1998 examples: Jessica, Megan, Allison, Justin, Ryan, Eric)
C - .17-.3%. Common names. Would fall in the modern top 100. You would probably know someone with these names, or at least know of them. (1998 examples: Chloe, Grace, Vanessa, Sean, Spencer, Seth)
D - .06-.17%. Less common names. In the modern top 250. You may not personally know someone with these names, but you’re aware of them. (1998 examples: Faith, Cassidy, Summer, Griffin, Dustin, Colby)
E - .02-.06%. Uncommon names. You’re aware these are names, but they are not common. Unusual enough they may be remarked upon. (1998 examples: Calista, Skye, Precious, Fabian, Justice, Lorenzo)
F - .01-.02%. Rare names. You may have heard of these names, but you probably don’t know anyone with one. Extremely unusual, and would likely be remarked upon. (1998 examples: Emerald, Lourdes, Serenity, Dario, Tavian, Adonis)
G - Very rare names. There are only a handful of people with these names in the entire country. You’ve never met anyone with this name.
H - Virtually non-existent. Names that theoretically could have existed in the Regency period (their original source pre-dates the early 19th century) but I found fewer than five (and often no) period examples of them being used in Regency England. (Example names taken from romance novels and online Regency name lists.)
Just to once again reinforce how POPULAR popular names were before we get to the tier lists - statistically, in a ballroom of 100 people in Regency London: 80 would have names from tiers S+/S. An additional 15 people would have names from tiers A/B and C. 4 of the remaining 5 would have names from D/E. Only one would have a name from below tier E.
Women's Names
S+ Mary, Elizabeth, Ann, Sarah      
S - Jane, Mary Ann+, Hannah, Susannah, Margaret, Catherine, Martha, Charlotte, Maria
A - Frances, Harriet, Sophia, Eleanor, Rebecca
B - Alice, Amelia, Bridget~, Caroline, Eliza, Esther, Isabella, Louisa, Lucy, Lydia, Phoebe, Rachel, Susan
C - Ellen, Fanny*, Grace, Henrietta, Hester, Jemima, Matilda, Priscilla
D - Abigail, Agnes, Amy, Augusta, Barbara, Betsy*, Betty*, Cecilia, Christiana, Clarissa, Deborah, Diana, Dinah, Dorothy, Emily, Emma, Georgiana, Helen, Janet^, Joanna, Johanna, Judith, Julia, Kezia, Kitty*, Letitia, Nancy*, Ruth, Winifred>
E - Arabella, Celia, Charity, Clara, Cordelia, Dorcas, Eve, Georgina, Honor, Honora, Jennet^, Jessie*^, Joan, Joyce, Juliana, Juliet, Lavinia, Leah, Margery, Marian, Marianne, Marie, Mercy, Miriam, Naomi, Patience, Penelope, Philadelphia, Phillis, Prudence, Rhoda, Rosanna, Rose, Rosetta, Rosina, Sabina, Selina, Sylvia, Theodosia, Theresa
F - (selected) Alicia, Bethia, Euphemia, Frederica, Helena, Leonora, Mariana, Millicent, Mirah, Olivia, Philippa, Rosamund, Sybella, Tabitha, Temperance, Theophila, Thomasin, Tryphena, Ursula, Virtue, Wilhelmina
G - (selected) Adelaide, Alethia, Angelina, Cassandra, Cherry, Constance, Delilah, Dorinda, Drusilla, Eva, Happy, Jessica, Josephine, Laura, Minerva, Octavia, Parthenia, Theodora, Violet, Zipporah
H - Alberta, Alexandra, Amber, Ashley, Calliope, Calpurnia, Chloe, Cressida, Cynthia, Daisy, Daphne, Elaine, Eloise, Estella, Lilian, Lilias, Francesca, Gabriella, Genevieve, Gwendoline, Hermione, Hyacinth, Inez, Iris, Kathleen, Madeline, Maude, Melody, Portia, Seabright, Seraphina, Sienna, Verity
Men's Names
S+ John, William, Thomas
S - James, George, Joseph, Richard, Robert, Charles, Henry, Edward, Samuel
A - Benjamin, (Mother’s/Grandmother’s maiden name used as first name)#
B - Alexander^, Andrew, Daniel, David>, Edmund, Francis, Frederick, Isaac, Matthew, Michael, Patrick~, Peter, Philip, Stephen, Timothy
C - Abraham, Anthony, Christopher, Hugh>, Jeremiah, Jonathan, Nathaniel, Walter
D - Adam, Arthur, Bartholomew, Cornelius, Dennis, Evan>, Jacob, Job, Josiah, Joshua, Lawrence, Lewis, Luke, Mark, Martin, Moses, Nicholas, Owen>, Paul, Ralph, Simon
E - Aaron, Alfred, Allen, Ambrose, Amos, Archibald, Augustin, Augustus, Barnard, Barney, Bernard, Bryan, Caleb, Christian, Clement, Colin, Duncan^, Ebenezer, Edwin, Emanuel, Felix, Gabriel, Gerard, Gilbert, Giles, Griffith, Harry*, Herbert, Humphrey, Israel, Jabez, Jesse, Joel, Jonas, Lancelot, Matthias, Maurice, Miles, Oliver, Rees, Reuben, Roger, Rowland, Solomon, Theophilus, Valentine, Zachariah
F - (selected) Abel, Barnabus, Benedict, Connor, Elijah, Ernest, Gideon, Godfrey, Gregory, Hector, Horace, Horatio, Isaiah, Jasper, Levi, Marmaduke, Noah, Percival, Shadrach, Vincent
G - (selected) Albion, Darius, Christmas, Cleophas, Enoch, Ethelbert, Gavin, Griffin, Hercules, Hugo, Innocent, Justin, Maximilian, Methuselah, Peregrine, Phineas, Roland, Sebastian, Sylvester, Theodore, Titus, Zephaniah
H - Albinus, Americus, Cassian, Dominic, Eric, Milo, Rollo, Trevor, Tristan, Waldo, Xavier
# Men were sometimes given a family surname (most often their mother's or grandmother's maiden name) as their first name - the most famous example of this being Fitzwilliam Darcy. If you were to combine all surname-based first names as a single 'name' this is where the practice would rank.
*Rank as a given name, not a nickname
+If you count Mary Ann as a separate name from Mary - Mary would remain in S+ even without the Mary Anns included
~Primarily used by people of Irish descent
^Primarily used by people of Scottish descent
>Primarily used by people of Welsh descent
I was going to continue on and write about why Regency-era first names were so uniform, discuss historically accurate surnames, nicknames, and include a little guide to finding 'unique' names that are still historically accurate - but this post is already very, very long, so that will have to wait for a later date.
If anyone has any questions/comments/clarifications in the meantime feel free to message me.
Methodology notes: All data is from marriage records covering six parishes in the City of Westminster between 1804 and 1821. The total sample size was 50,950 individuals.
I chose marriage records rather than births/baptisms as I wanted to focus on individuals who were adults during the Regency era rather than newborns. I think many people make the mistake when researching historical names by using baby name data for the year their story takes place rather than 20 to 30 years prior, and I wanted to avoid that. If you are writing a story that takes place in 1930 you don’t want to research the top names for 1930, you need to be looking at 1910 or earlier if you are naming adult characters.
I combined (for my own sanity) names that are pronounced identically but have minor spelling differences: i.e. the data for Catherine also includes Catharines and Katherines, Susannah includes Susannas, Phoebe includes Phebes, etc.
The compound 'Mother's/Grandmother's maiden name used as first name' designation is an educated guesstimate based on what I recognized as known surnames, as I do not hate myself enough to go through 25,000+ individuals and confirm their mother's maiden names. So if the tally includes any individuals who just happened to be named Fitzroy/Hastings/Townsend/etc. because their parents liked the sound of it and not due to any familial relations - my bad.
I did a small comparative survey of 5,000 individuals in several rural communities in Rutland and Staffordshire (chosen because they had the cleanest data I could find and I was lazy) to see if there were any significant differences between urban and rural naming practices and found the results to be very similar. The most noticeable difference I observed was that the S+ tier names were even MORE popular in rural areas than in London. In Rutland between 1810 and 1820 Elizabeths comprised 21.4% of all brides vs. 15.3% in the London survey. All other S+ names also saw increases of between 1% and 6%. I also observed that the rural communities I surveyed saw a small, but noticeable and fairly consistent, increase in the use of names with Biblical origins.
Sources of the records I used for my survey: 
Ancestry.com. England & Wales Marriages, 1538-1988 [database on-line].
Ancestry.com. Westminster, London, England, Church of England Marriages and Banns, 1754-1935 [database on-line].
10K notes · View notes
vivwritesfics · 11 days
Text
Max Verstappen Shirt
The fans and fellow wags don't like it when she wears the same out fit to a Grand Prix. She doesn't much care
Tumblr media
There were quite a few things Max liked about dating an ordinary girl. 1) she had no idea who he was. 2) she had no idea who his friends were. 3) she didn't expect anything from him.
Max could get takeout for them while they watched a movie and she would be happy. He didn't have to take her out to fancy, overpriced restaurants. He didn't have to take her out shopping for a new outfit every time they left the apartment.
Now, Max would have done all if this I'd she asked. But she didn’t ask. She appreciated him the way he was.
It was a little while into their relationship before Max took her to her first Grand Prix. Her outfit was cute and extremely weather appropriate. A cute top and a cute pair of jeans. Max walked her through the paddock with his hand on the small of her back.
When Max won, he ran over to his team, jumping into their arms. And then he was taking his helmet off, replaced it with his hat and walked over to her, kissing her slowly. (It was captured on video, and circulated the Internet for weeks. Every time it came across her feed, she couldn't stop herself from sending it to Max).
At the next Grand Prix she dressed as well as she could. The jeans were the same, but the top was different. Her outfit was both complimented and criticised online.
Not that she saw the criticism. No, all she saw was the video of Max kissing her after his win. Of her wrapping her arms so tight around him as she peppered kisses all over his face beforing giving him maybe the most memorable kiss of his life.
She knew Max had money. She was aware of it every time she flew in his private jet. Every time she stayed in his Monaco apartment. Every time he drove her in his cars. She knew he had money, but she didn't want him buying her stuff.
No, that wasn't the reason she was with him. She wasn't there because he was an F1 driver, because he could buy her everything she ever wanted. She was there because he was a cute, slightly dorky guy that she wanted to spend every waking minute with.
She remembered the first time she wore the same thing twice to a Grand Prix. The outfit was so cute, but it didn't matter how cute it was.
So far, all of the other wags had been so lovely to her. They were kind, but she hadn't been around long enough to really be friends with any of them.
It was Daniels girlfriend that pulled her to one side before the race. The two had spent the most time together out of any of the wags she had met so far (aided by Maxs friendship with Daniel).
"Hey Love," she said, wearing a charming smile as she wrapped her arms around her. "I love the top. Have I seen it before?" Daniels girlfriend asked.
Y/N couldn't help but grin as she looked down at her top. "Thanks!" She grinned. "Found it really cheap, wore it to Monaco," she said.
Daniels girlfriend sucked in a breath. "Well, as a general rule, Wags don't wear the same outfit to two grand prix," she said, her hand on her shoulder. "Not unless they really have to."
The way she said it, she was clearly implying something. But she wasn't the only person thinking it. There were people online saying the same thing.
"Well, nice catching up," Daniels girlfriend said and walked away, leaving her alone.
She couldn't bring herself to look dejected as she walked back to the Red Bull garage. Unlike other Wags, she didn't have the funds for a new outfit every race. Max would have been only too happy to buy her a new outfit for every Grand Prix if she asked.
But she wouldn't ask.
"What's up?" Asked Max as she walked towards him with an unintentional pout on her lips.
She quickly replaced the pout with when she looked up at him. "Nothing," she said. "Just hold me."
Doubt and all kinds of negative feelings consumed her. But she was a fighter and she needed to do something about it.
There are incredible things you can find on Etsy, like This Shirt Right Here. She bought herself one. No, she bought herself five. The first time she turned up wearing one, it was iconic. The second time she went to a Grand Prix wearing one, it was still iconic.
If the wags and the fans had a problem with her wearing the same thing to each Grand Prix, they could suck her dick.
1K notes · View notes
thexsilentxwordsmith · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Dad!Simon Riley x Fem!reader
Simon Riley: Girl Dad
From the request here ; pic screenshot from this video
“Can I come in now?” you ask, popping your head into the nursery as Simon finishes getting your 3 month old daughter Anna ready for the day. 
She wriggles in his grasp, babbling away as he mutters in a hushed tone to her about keeping still for daddy.
"Ya think this is funny yeah," he teases her, tickling her chubby tummy before trying to wrangle one of her legs in his grasp.
It’s like music to his soul the way the happy talking sounds she makes touches his heart and it only makes him want to do whatever he can so that she will keep making them for him. That’s why it always takes longer than usual to get her dressed when he does it.
You crane your neck trying to sneak a peak, but his voice stops you. “Not yet,” he says and moves his body to block your view. 
He doesn’t want you to see before he’s ready. The outfit is one he picked up the other night on a whim, the moment he saw it he knew Anna had to have it for today, and he wants to get it all on to give the full effect. He finishes straightening her up and tucks her body sitting up in the crook of his arm. She is content as can be being snuggled at the side of his chest, happily clapping her little hands together as they turn to face you. 
“Well?” he asks, brow furrowed and body slightly tense as he waits for your critique. “How'd we do?”
You match your daughter’s vibrant smile as you see the outfit Simon’s bought all on his own: a bright yellow corduroy romper with frill capped sleeves, little socks with suns on them, and a big yellow bow to match. Your heart swells full of emotion at the sight; it’s just an outfit, sure, but it really means so much more than the sum of its parts. You know just how far Simon has come in his journey with her and it truly warms your heart to see him so smitten with the little babe this way.  
When she first came home, there wasn’t a moment when Simon wasn’t on edge around her, nervous that somehow, someway, he would end up hurting her. She seemed so small to him in those first days, so incredibly delicate as she lay sleeping in her bassinet like the most perfect doll, that he was certain that someone as rough around the edges as him would never be able to be near her without breaking her and that was something he was not willing to risk.
She is his gift, his light, a treasure that came from out of all the years of heartache and hardship and he would never let anything bad ever happen to her.
It took some time and a lot of encouragement on your part, but finally Simon found his confidence and never looked back. Any chance now that he can get he is holding her, changing her, feeding her; anything and everything he can do to show her his love by his actions alone. And whether he gives himself the credit for it or not, he is doing a marvelous job.
“How did I know you'd choose something yellow?” you laugh as Simon glares at you, trying not to crack that fake tough facade. 
It is becoming a pattern for him to choose yellow things when it comes to Anna. When she came home from the hospital a few months ago in that yellow onesie, it was like a flip and been switched and that was it; that was her hue from then on. It is strange, Simon never really had a favorite color before that special day and then suddenly yellow was never the same. Now he cannot imagine his life without it.
His face breaks into a smile as he shakes his head, not ready to admit that he is becoming predictable. “Come on, did I do it right or not? Just want to be sure it looks fine on her. We got a big day and I want it ta be perfect.”
Your face brightens as you look her over again. “She looks adorable, Simon,” you reply cheerfully. “You did good, baby. I think you’re really getting the hang of this dad thing.”
Looking down at her in his grasp, he beams with a sense of accomplishment and his tense shoulders ease. Parenting is not something Simon ever thought he could be good at, he never thought he would be the one with the chance at having a family, but each day he is making strides in the right direction to becoming the dad he desperately wants to be.  
“Are you sure you’ll be okay on your own today?” you ask as you watch Simon place a delicate kiss to the top of Anna’s small, wispy-haired head. “Cause I can stay if you need me to. All I gotta do is make a call and let them know I can’t go.”
Simon shakes his head and reaches for you with his free arm, pulling you by the wrist until you step close enough that he can wrap his arm around your hip to pull you against him opposite your daughter. “Ya worry too damn much, sweetheart,” he says as his hand finds your cheek, his thumb stroking across the soft skin before he is leaning his face in towards yours. 
His full lips catch you in their tender embrace, a kiss that is full of emotion, and in an instant your eyes flutter closed as you relinquish yourself to him. You let all those worries fall away as the gentle touch of his lips, the heat from his breath, the passion flowing through his kiss calms your mind. He conveys so much without ever speaking a single word and in a flash you are put at ease.
Slowly he breaks away, already missing your taste the moment your lips part. Eyes still shut, he rests his forehead against yours, rocking all three of you back and forth a moment as he enjoys the feeling of having his entire life resting comfortably in his arms. You both open your eyes after a time and look down at Anna babbling away to herself, before looking back at each other. This is all still new and unchartered territory, so the both of you are working to figure it all out, but so far it has been anything except bad. 
“I promise, I got ‘er. We’re gonna be just fine,” he says quietly. “Isn’t that right, princess?”
At the sound of his voice Anna turns her face to find his and it lights up as it always does whenever her favorite person talks to her. She even employs her recently-learned skill of giggling happily to punctuate that she agrees with whatever it was she was just asked, even though she doesn’t understand a word of it.  
Simon kisses your forehead to be sure the worry is completely gone. “It’s just a couple hours on base and then we’ll be home the rest of tha day,” he says. “Besides, might be nice to show her off to the guys. She does look real pretty today.” 
“That she does,” you agree as you quickly check the clock on your phone and with a kiss to your baby and one more for Simon you are gone, leaving the pair alone.
Simon gets to work double checking everything in his backpack that he has to bring for her: extra diapers, wipes, bottles, toys, anything he could need while he is out. It’s in his nature, years of military training has come in handy as he is prepared for it all. Satisfied, he turns back to the baby at his side. “Alright princess,” he says, “ready to go see where your dad spends all his time when he ain’t at home?”
The moment he’s walking on base, black backpack filled with essentials strapped to his back, tiny baby girl dressed in bright clothes tucked in his arms, he’s drawing curious stares from everyone he passes. This is the first time she has gone to base with him, so of course people are going to be inquisitive about things. How can they not? Simon looks like… well, Simon: intense, stoic, intimidating. Even in just his black t-shirt and jeans, with his lightweight balaclava on, he is still an imposing figure. Never one to be shy per se, Simon still does not like the attention on him, but since he is with his little angel he doesn’t care. He is proud to show off the best damn thing he has ever helped to create.
The contrast between him and his daughter he knows is jarring and Simon laughs to himself at how absurd this must look for someone like him with such a coarse demeanor to be handling such a precious, sweet thing. Who would have thought that the scary skull-masked military officer would have a family of his own? It is a shock he is sure. 
“Seems we’re gonna be the talk ‘round ‘ere today, princess,” he says as he looks down at Anna, secure in his grasp as they continue on towards his office.
She is too busy looking everywhere her little head can turn to be bothered by anything. Being out and about with her father, seeing things she’s never seen before, which is pretty much everything, has her interested and engaged with the sights around her. Those small brown eyes, the ones that are a carbon copy of his, stare on as she silently takes everything in.
He makes it to his office and gets set up, grabbing everything that he needs in one tight spot as he sits Anna up in his lap with a toy for her to play with. She is content for a while as he goes through paperwork, occasionally he gives her a tickle or readjusts her on his thigh, something to show that he hasn’t forgotten she’s there with him. 
Barely an hour has passed before Anna begins to whine and fuss and Simon knows what that means: she’s hungry. He grabs the prepped bottle out of the bag and walks to the small microwave in the corner of the room, warming it and testing it on his wrist before he moves back to his desk and sits back down in his chair, cradling her in his arms against his chest as he places the nipple of the bottle in her mouth.
“There ya are, luv,” he comforts her until she settles into him, “I gotcha. Daddy didn’t forget.”
Unknown to Simon, there is an unexpected guest that has just appeared near his office door, though before the person can even knock to announce themselves, they are caught by surprise at the sight before them. Johnny, who’s come to deliver something from Price, stops right in his tracks and stares at the scene before him.
He stands there, watching as Simon tenderly holds this little infant in his arms, quietly rocking back and forth as she drinks her bottle. Every now and again he speaks to her softly, the skin around his eyes tightening to indicate there is a smile underneath the mask. There is an ease to his movements as if he knows exactly what he is doing and it genuinely shocks the young sergeant. Who could have ever guessed that this would be something Simon would be such a natural at?
As Anna is finishing the bottle, Simon looks up as he feels a pair of eyes on him to see Johnny standing there, obscured by the doorframe, silently watching. He sets the empty bottle down on his desk and moves Anna to sit upright on his thigh, leaning her against the crook of his arm so that he can pat and rub her back until she burps. 
“Can I help ya, Mactavish?” Simon’s distinct voice calls out, catching Johnny off-guard as he realizes he’s been caught staring.
“Sorry, L.T.” Johnny stutters out as he hurriedly steps inside the office, remembering why he is here in the first place, and sets some papers upon his desk. “Price sent these; says he needs ya to look ‘em over.”
Simon nods in understanding, his hand still rubbing the baby’s back. “Will do,” he agrees, thinking this will be the end of the interaction, but Johnny still lingers. “Anything else?”
“I heard ‘round base that ya had your little one here today. Had to come see if it was true fer myself,” Johnny admits with guilt. 
“Well, ya could meet ‘er if ya like, ‘stead a standin’ there just starin’.”  Simon nods his head down at the baby. “Johnny, this is Anna.”
The sergeant observes her as she begins to coo, her eyes catching the tattoos along Simon’s muscular arm, her petite fingers tapping and poking along the lines and patterns with delight as she loves to do when he holds her like this. She’s so engrossed that she hasn’t realized there is another person in the room yet.
Johnny clears his throat. “Didn’t mean ta stare, ya know. It’s just a surprise ta see she’s actually real, I guess.”
The original members of the 141 know about Anna, it wasn’t something that Simon could hide once she was about to make her way into the world, but it’s a bit jarring for the Scot to see someone that he had previously known to be so toughened by the world change so drastically. Anyone who gets close enough can see it in the lieutenant’s soft gaze: he adores the little girl and that is… interesting, to say the least.
Simon chuckles at the clear surprise in Johnny’s voice as Anna is still playing with his arm. “Bit absurd, innit Johnny?” he questions while watching her with a prideful twinkle in those brown eyes as she giggles. “Me with a kid? Doesn’t seem possible, does it?” 
“Ya seem a natural ta me,” the Scot admits in awe of how easily he makes it seem, as if he was given some secret knowledge that made him know exactly what to do and how to do it. “Then again I don’t know the first thing ‘bout babies. Wouldn’t even know where ta start.”
Simon is reminded about how when he first found out he was going to be a dad he had started reading all the books, researching all the things like a good, capable soldier would, but how all of that prep was nothing in the end as the moment she came into the world everything was turned on its head. It’s not like in the books, it’s so much better and it is days like today that make it worth all the worry and fear and anxiety he had to break through to get here.
“Easier than ya think,” Simon replies with a chuckle as he moves Anna around facing forward now. “Once ya get the hang of it.”
“Don’t tell my girl that,” Johnny laughs back. “Can’t afford one right now.”
Anna’s attention is stirred away from Simon’s tattoos and towards the other man standing in the room with them. She looks up at Johnny in awe, not having much experience with others outside of Simon and you, but Johnny shoots her his classic smile and he has her giggling again in a flash. 
“Well hey there Anna, nice ta meet ya,” he introduces himself before turning back to Simon. “I think she likes me.”
“It's your hair she's eyein’,” Simon points out, following her eye line.
Sure enough as soon as Johnny runs his hands over the mohawk cut into his hair her eyes light up. “Can she touch it?” he asks Simon and he nods in agreement.
Johnny falls to one knee in front of the little girl, leans his head down, and lets her put her hand in it. Her short, chubby fingers pull the strands as she laughs, the short, spiky pieces pricking her fingertips. She pulls away quickly before bringing her hand back in again, a sort of game that she repeats a few more times before Johnny gets back to his feet. 
“He’s a funny one, ain’t he, princess?” Simon questions his little one as he strokes his thumb around the smile that fills her tiny, round cheeks. “Ya like him, yeah?”
She coos, her little lips forming an ‘o’ so that she sounds like a dove. That’s the closest to a yes as they are going to get. 
“I sure ‘ope ya do, seein’ as I’m your dad’s best friend,” Johnny picks, looking to Simon to see his reaction. 
He rolls his eyes at the statement, but stays silent and doesn’t correct him. Instead Simon opts to end the conversation there, needing to get finished here anyway so that he can get back home. As much as Johnny’s company isn’t as grating as it first was, he is ready to spend some alone time with the baby before you get back. “Well, if ya don’t mind, I need to get back to it. Say goodbye Anna.”
Johnny agrees, though his mouth twitches like he wants to ask a question, but ultimately decides not to ask it in the end. He turns to leave, but Simon guesses at what he is wanting and calls out behind him so that he stops. 
“And ya can tell the others they can come see ‘er if they want,” Simon assures, “I know they’re probably itchin’ to get a glimpse of her too. That’s why they sent ya, yeah? See if I was up for company?”
Johnny turns around and nods his head. Fuck, they’ve been caught. “Will do, L.T.” he says. “Can ya blame us though? She’s pretty damn cute.”
And with that he turns back around. As Johnny leaves the office with the sounds of Simon and Anna at his back, he can’t help but smile to himself at seeing his friend finally have a bit of happiness; if anyone deserves it, it is Simon. Wait till the others see just how much things around here are going to change.
1K notes · View notes
dumbseee · 11 months
Text
insecurity.
f1 au/fic: in which, lando and y/n have been dating for a few months, but fans are still talking about y/n’s past relationship. making lando feel insecure and questioning y/n’s feelings for him.
lando norris x singer!reader
(fc: jess alexander)
note: english isn’t my first language so excuse me for the mistakes this might have xx ALSO it’s the first time that i’m actually writing something so i hope it’s not too bad lmao. thank you for reading my aus btw <3
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell, danielricciardo and 2 799 009 others.
y/n: happy birthday to my sun, you’re such a beautiful soul, i’m so proud to call you mine. i love you to the moon and back and promise to always love you.
_
landonorris: i love you more baby
danielricciardo: we’re at practice and he’s crying btw
fan1: they’re so absjdkdoldel
fan2: mama y papa
fan3: he always smile so brightly when he’s looking at her :(
fan4: i’m sorry but i can’t help but think about y/n’s ex… on the same day last year she was posting pictures of him
fan5: @.fan4 don’t do that… it’s about lando, not her ex
fan6: am i tripping or she also used to call her ex, her « sun »??
fan7: @.fan6 WHAT
fan8: @.fan6 no she didn’t?
Tumblr media Tumblr media
_
lando sighed and threw his phone on his bed. of course he saw all the tweets about you and your stupid ex, how could he ignore them when it was all over the internet. people were speculating about if he was a rebound or a toy for you. lando was hurt, he always thought that you were way out of his league anyways so he should’ve seen it coming, right? you were an amazing and worldwide known singer, with your angelic voice and heartbreaking lyrics. you sang with your heart which made anyone who was listening to you, fall in love immediately.
that’s what happened with lando. he was always a big fan of yours, singing your songs on top of his lungs at parties, and following every single news about you, he even went to your concerts. one day, he went viral for singing your song on the radio with his engineer, he also happened to have made it to p3, which he said was because you were his lucky charm. the video was published online and went viral, you saw it and immediately found it adorable. the rest was history.
when you guys hard launched your relationship to the world, the big majority was happy for you two, happy to see you smile and happy to see that lando managed to get his crush. but a small minority saw that relationship as a rebound for you, saying horrible things about how you never loved lando and how you would dump him in a few months to go back to your one true love, your ex.
lando saw it all. and he hated it.
"lando? are you okay?" you asked, when you went to check in on him. he was supposed to bring a few blankets so you guys could watch a movie together. but he was taking way too much time so you went to see if he was okay.
"do you love me y/n?" he asked you, and the sadness in his eyes almost made you cry. lando’s eyes was what you loved the most about him, with his smile of course, but his gorgeous green eyes were full of emotions, you could drown in them and feel every little thing he was feeling just by looking at him.
"what are you talking about? of course i love you lando." you say, taking his hand in yours and softly kissing his knuckles. you saw him close his eyes and sigh deeply. you pushed him on the bed and sat next to him. "what happened?"
"it’s stupid, don’t worry about it." he finally looked up at you and faked a smile but it didn’t fool you.
"lando. tell me." you were still holding his hand and with your free hand you started to caress his cheek. he closed his eyes again and melted against your touch.
"your fans are still talking about your past relationship and how i’m nothing but a rebound to you." he said it in such a low tone you almost didn’t hear him. but sadly you heard his words and you could feel your heart shatter at how your fans words affected him. "i know that you guys stayed together for a while, and i know that you wrote good songs about him, i listened to them all, but… if you still love him you can-…"
"lando norris." you said in a serious tone, which startled him. "how am i supposed to love anyone else when you stole my heart and refuse to give it back?" his eyes lit up a little by your words. "and i literally wrote 56 songs about how much i love you so you better listen to them all once again and never doubt my feelings for you ever again, boy."
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, charlottesiine and 6 808 009 others.
y/n: ‘you are in love’ is officially out ;) little gift from me to you sweet lan <3
_
maxfewtrell: lando listened to it and locked himself in the bathroom to cry
landonorris: @.maxfewtrell FAKE NEWS
danielricciardo: i wish someone would write 57 songs about me…
heidiberger_: @.danielricciardo excuse me? (great song btw y/n!)
liked by y/n.
fan1: ZKSKSLXPODOSOZ
fan2: y/n making haters eat their words with one song: queen behaviour
fan3: i hope haters will stop hating on lando now how can you say that y/n is using him as a rebound
fan4: CALL 911 IM ON THE VERGE OF DEATH
fan5: y/n writing a love song for lando on his birthday :(
fan6: i love them so much pls
fan7: that whole drama about her ex was so dumb, they broke up for a reason and y/n also wrote songs about how awful he was to her towards the end of their relationship, why do you guys want her to go back to that dog?
liked by y/n.
3K notes · View notes
hannieehaee · 4 days
Text
18+ / mdi
Tumblr media Tumblr media
content: newbf!vernon, based off this quote, appearance from some svt members, afab reader, smut(?), suggestive, etc.
wc: 1848
a/n: this is such an odd premise but it caught my attention so yeah<3
masterlist
"i dont get the joke," seungkwan cocked his head to the side in a questioning manner.
"yeah, april fool's was last month?," added joshua.
"there's no joke. we're dating."
even as you and vernon found yourselves cuddled up on the couch, – in a manner only a couple would intertwine with each other – your friends seemed unimpressed by the mere suggestion of the two of you dating.
"so you've been besties for twelve years and suddenly you're dating? no warning, no nothing? not very believable", answered mingyu, staring at you in nothing short of annoyance.
"why is this so surprising? you guys knew that i had a crush on her," argued vernon, feeling a bit annoyed at the way all his friends were currently staring him down. meanwhile, you appeared to be completely chill as you nuzzled into his side, watching videos on his phone and ignoring the conversation altogether.
"i just don't buy it."
"yeah, i don't get the joke, but i'm not falling for it."
"she's out of your league anyway."
seungkwan, seungcheol and jeonghan all expressed their sentiments to vernon as he groaned in frustration, unable to understand why it was so difficult to accept that he had finally grown the balls to ask you out. alas, he gave up as his friends grew distracted by something else, opting to go back to watching cat videos with you on his phone.
this was a brand new change in your dynamic, so maybe it'd be hard to grasp at first. but it was fine. vernon didn't need his friends to acknowledge his relationship in order to make it real. he'd simply continue to love on you like he'd been doing since you accepted to be his girlfriend, damning any denials from his friends.
~
acting unaffected by his friends' constant refutals of his new relationship proved to be harder than vernon had first anticipated. they'd gone above and beyond to attempt and disprove your relationship, claiming that it simply didn't make any sense.
any time you posted a picture with vernon it'd get spammed with comments from all twelve boys declaring the falsehood of your relationship.
jeonghanieyoon: booo 🍅
joshuacoustic: drop the fake bf and date me instead 😘
dk_is_dokyeom: ok u guys are starting to look believable 🧐
sometimes they'd even respond to vernon's stories about you and slide in his dms just to call him a dumbass for attempting to make this 'a thing' when it was clear you two were lying.
from: pledisboos - stop being a coward and ask her out for real
from: feat.dino - clearly fake. try harder next time!
in retrospect, maybe vernon only had himself to blame for this. after years of liking you, he never once gave any indication of attempting to leave the friendzone. his friends had all given up on hyping him up to confess to you years ago, leaving his crush as a dormant subject of conversation. it was quite sudden how you and vernon ended up together, and your dynamic hadnt changed too much, so your upgrade from friends to lovers was likely not noticeable to the naked eye.
however, this did not excuse the damned booing vernon had to endure any time the two of you walked into a room hand-in-hand. it also did not excuse jeonghan and mingyu's continuous flirting with you – they were doing it to prove a point, they said. and the most frustrating aspect of it all was how nonchalant you were about it all, always giggling along with his friends and never backing vernon up when he'd try and argue with them.
this was quite out of character for vernon. his demeanor had always been extremely chill and laid back, never one to be bothered by any outside forces (much less his dumb friends). you, however, were not helping manners in any way. you found the whole situation funny, telling vernon not to stress over it as you giggled over how passionate both vernon and his friends were about such a benign subject.
so, vernon gave up. he guessed that since you found the running gag about your 'fake' relationship amusing rather than frustrating (as he did), then he would just leave it alone. he was never one for pda anyways, so attempting to prove his relationship to his friends was kind of like beating a dead horse.
what vernon forgot to consider, however, was how nosy his friends were.
when it was time for all fourteen of you to spend the week at mingyu's beach house, he had let his guard down far too much, leading to a situation he'd like to consider both a win and a loss.
despite the sheer size of the beach house, housing fourteen people proved to be quite a difficult task, meaning that roommates were a must. with six rooms, everyone was separated into twos, with two rooms containing one extra roommate each. you and vernon always paired up together with no questions asked, except this time you were teased and mocked as you settled into your rooms, all while they assigned you chan as an extra roommate with the sarcastic intent of him keeping an eye on the two of you – "just want to make sure you don't get down to any funny business," had sad dokyeom in a mocking tone.
it was quite common for everyone but vernon to go out and play some badminton or basketball during these types of outings. he just wasnt a sports guy, and he was well loved despite his lack of participation. you'd occasionally join the guys, but would mostly hang back with vernon, which was what happened this time around. usually, you'd simply lounge around and watch a movie, but now that you were finally together, vernon decided to make better use of your alone time.
"are you sure we should be doing this?", you pulled away with a heavy breath, tilting your head back so vernon's lips could trail down your neck.
"it's fine, baby. they're all busy. they don't even believe we're dating, so they probably just think we're watching a movie," he explained as his hands attempted to get you to sit on his lap.
you didn't seem to need convincing as you slid over onto his lap, allowing his hands to guide your hips against his own. even through the pajamas you were wearing, he was sure you could feel his hardness under you.
"fuck, you're so fucking warm," he murmured as his hands went under your shirt, feeling up your warm skin and throwing it off in the process.
his lips went back to yours, groaning against you as your hips sped up against his own. easily frustrated, he laid you down, bringing down his pants and boxers to his mid thigh and leaving you in just your panties, adjusting his hardness so it'd grind itself perfectly against your clothed folds. the wetness seeping from your panties drove him insane with desire, but he couldn't stop grinding into you, growing easily obsessed with the stimulation. his lips had made their way back to your own, groaning endlessly against them while your hands pulled at his hair in a way that made his eyes cross.
"hmm, nonnie ..." you'd murmur every so often, making his resolve break little by little.
"fuck, is this okay, baby? just- wanna make you cum like this. i'll fuck you, i promise. just feel so fucking good like this," he groaned as you licked into his mouth, refusing to entertain any amount of separation.
eventually he reached down to your tits, tonguing at them like a starved man in search of his next meal. he was shameless in his desire for you, having wanted you for far too long and finally having you all to himself. no other thought occupied his mind at the moment. the touch and sight of your pretty body under his own was all his brain had the capacity of entertaining.
which was how neither of you noticed the boy suddenly intruding the scene, screaming in absolute shock at the nasty sight in front of him.
"oh my god?! you weren't lying?!"
what was even more unfortunate was how chan's yelling immediately alerted the rest of the members (or at least the nosier ones), leading to the door being filled by about seven spectators within seconds.
the only fortunate thing about the situation had been how fast vernon's protective instincts over you took over, covering you up with a blanket the moment he saw chan enter the room, preventing all the nosy men from having a peek at the nudity only vernon was allowed to see (and apparently chan too, as vernon had not noticed his presence until after the fact).
however, even as he covered you up, he left himself completely bare, having to take on all their shocked commentary whilst fully nude, barely able to pull up his boxers a few moments into their intrusion.
"no way, you're actually dating?!"
"either that or they took this joke a little far ..."
"man, channie's gonna be jacking off to this for ages."
"how the fuck did you score her??"
"do you guys want a third?"
these were only a few of the comments thrown at you and vernon within the first twenty seconds of the guys' presence in your room. however, to vernon it felt like a whole hour of scrutiny before he finally shook the shock off and began yelling at them to leave.
"get the fuck out! and never look at my girlfriend again!", he got up and began pushing them out as a few of them giggled at his anger whilst some others remained in shock at the situation.
in the meantime, you had pulled up the blanket over your head as you sat crisscross on the bed, likely too bashful to face the situation until your friends took their leave.
once vernon closed and locked the door, grabbing a pillow and throwing it outside for chan (who would not be allowed back in, by the way), vernon sped to your side, uncovering you, fully worried that you might be mad or petrified at what had just happened. to his surprise, you began laughing the moment you first made eye contact, causing vernon to furrow his eyebrows in question.
"baby, what the fuck? you find this funny?", he wasn't mad, but more so extremely confused.
"you got want you wanted, nonnie. there's no way to deny we're dating now," you grinned, crawling to sit on his lap again.
"god, i take it back. i'll never be able to fuck you again in peace. i was just about to cum, too."
"'was'?", you asked, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and leaning in closer, "you don't wanna anymore?", you tilted your head in fake curiosity.
"i mean-"
"they already know we're fucking. might as well have fun with it. right, nonnie?", you grinned.
chuckling at you, he couldn't help but agree with your horny logic. his boner was still half-there anyways.
"c'mere, baby."
966 notes · View notes
steviewashere · 5 months
Text
Kiss and Tell
(Can be found on ao3)
Steddie WC: 2,279 Tags: Post Season 4, Steve Harrington Has Auditory Processing Disorder, Eddie Munson Loves to Talk, Minor Angst, Mostly Fluff, Queer Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington Has a Bisexual Awakening, But He Already Knows (Sort of), First Kiss, Lots of Kissing
Based on this post that I made. Happy reading! <3
-------- Steve has a staring problem. He knows this. He's been told this. And it's not something he can help or fix or find an alternative for. This is just what he knows.
It's something he's tried to maintain since he was a little boy. And, on that same note, is something he picked up while being a boy in a room with two adults who were fast talkers and big negotiators and all-in on the nature of their careers. But his parents certainly hate that he has a staring problem. Which, that's not unusual, most people hate that he does. Because he doesn't look them in the eyes for more than thirty seconds at a time. And even if he does, he doesn't hear a single thing they said, politely asking they start over, and feeling hurt when they just scoff as loud as possible and walk away from the conversation all together.
The audio just doesn't process. Never has. Probably never will.
He listens to music, but doesn't understand any meaning. He talks over the phone, but must have all other sound blocked out and the curtains shut and his eyes closed to imagine what the words look like leaving the other person's mouth. He argues, but loses track of the original point of the argument—when he laughs instead of apologizes.
And it would be fine—if—he wasn't close to losing his life every year. Where he has to listen to everybody and the important tiny details and the plans and the reasons for what they're doing. Which leads him to danger. Which gives him a bruised face. Which makes the listening even harder, once the concussion leaves and he's just got the leftover damage of his quirkiness.
It would be fine—if—he wasn't made to feel so stupid for what he must do. The jabs and the constant reminders and the...yeah, his sob story.
But there was Tommy Hagan and Carol Perkins, who he could keep up with. Because they'd talk about the same things over and over, until he could practically relay all the information, pulled straight from the deep crevices of his brain, and it ends up that they had forgotten, rather than him.
And there was Nancy Wheeler, who was polite enough to repeat things. Who had flash cards and a soft, focusing voice. It was easy to write off looking at her lips. "Eyes up here, Steve," she'd say. "Sorry," he'd respond sheepishly, "getting lost." And he'd chuckle and she'd giggle and then they'd kiss a little and he wouldn't be reminded that he's just a little weird. That, maybe, he just isn't normal.
Robin Buckley makes things easy-ish. She talks fast. And a lot. And she never looks him in the eyes, unless she's asking for a very serious favor, or he has something on his face, or she just feels the need (she claims it's that she hasn't looked in a while, but he shrugs her off every time). (If he can get away with staring at her lips, then she can get away with never looking him in the eyes.) He's mentioned, though, that he has a hard time following her sometimes. That he needs the words repeated a few times. Explained the lip thing, with a tense voice and a quake in his chest and his fingers tapping at the sides of his thighs. And, for a brief moment, he had felt like a creep. Like one of those weirdos that preys on the idea of women kissing. And he wanted to open up Family Video's register, shove his head inside, and sort himself out into the container of fives. But she shrugged, said "Okay," and went back on some ramble, to which he was immediately drawn to her mouth. And saw her repeat the name, Vickie, at least twenty times. He grinned and then when the store was empty, he leaned across the counter and teasingly said, "You have a big fat crush on Vickie, don't you?" To say that he was proud of her sputtering is an understatement.
Now, Dustin and the others were harder to get through. Because they moved at their own pace. And they don't really stop to add him to the conversation. He gets it, to an extent. He knows that he's not really all that intrigued in what they enjoy. (Even if he really leans into the conversation when they mention Sherlock Holmes or Dracula or Star Wars or, even, Star Trek. And he pretends to not be interested in their science fair projects. Or the one time he caught them huddled around a Sports Illustrated, in which he fought the urge to chat their ears off about both baseball and basketball statistics.) But there's a point in the conversations where he's made to feel a little dumb; even if he was staring where they were speaking, but they always grow frustrated, a huff of air released, when they notice he's not "paying attention" (translation: looking them in the eyes. "Because, Steve, it's just talking etiquette!" Dustin had shouted once).
He loves all of them anyway. Even if he misses words. And he loses track of what they were saying. He just wishes they were a little bit more forgivable about it at the end of the day.
Then, Eddie Munson is walking along side him in an alternate universe. He's peeled the vest off his back and chucked it at Steve. And they're talking. Jealous of one another, but talking. But, Eddie's voice goes soft and quiet, his eyes pointing towards Nancy's back.
Steve is looking at Nancy, words fading into the background. And it's not a moment of realization. Or a moment of longing. Yearning, what say you. No—it's one of his moments in which he's "listening," but not processing. So he looks back. And for a mere second, Eddie's eyes are big where Steve stares. Big and wet and curious. Big and wet and persuasive. Big and wet and not at all his lips and Steve is still not listening.
But his lips. Well, Steve's seen lips. These are pretty. They're pink. Chapped and bitten and plush appearing. Mesmerizing. Stretching over Eddie's sharp teeth, exposing dimples and smile lines, making his recent stubble more noticeable than it's ever been before. But his lips are pretty.
Like girls lips, Steve muses. Not really taking in what that means. Because Eddie's saying something about true love. And—shit—okay. Steve can get behind an act of true love. He can get behind sharing denim and coating Eddie's clothes in blood and staring down his lips and—god, his eyes, Steve can't help but notice once more.
Eddie's like a vulnerable cow. With pretty lips, he has to point out. Or a baby deer. With such pretty lips. And he's talking and Steve's finally listening. But it's not just processing. No, Steve's intrigued, interested even. He tilts his head like a curious puppy. Leaning in. Eddie's breath ghosts the tip of his nose. And, sure, it's a little rank. But weirdly sweet. Warm where Steve is otherwise cold. Warm in places Steve's never considered to feel warm in, but he's willing to give in, to wrap up in whatever Eddie has to say. If it all means more of him.
So, it makes sense that after all that they go through, Steve finds himself in Eddie's orbit. As a friend. As a trauma bond. As everything Eddie needs him to be.
He sits on the Munson's couch. On the cushion that dips a little too low. The lights orange and dim and casting beautiful streaks of almost candle light on Eddie's soft, beautiful features. Highlighting where his nose is the most bulbous. His pronounced Cupid's bow. The outer edges of his irises, golden and honey against the off-white of his scleras.
Eddie talks like Robin does. Excited. A lot. Fast. But his voice is soft, focused on the information—like Nancy's. It's teasing, like Dustin's. Soft, though. So gentle. Murmured. Which makes sense, if Steve were to stop and think about it for just a moment. With how late it is. With the little amount of weed they smoked. And it all just fits, with how slow and careful Eddie's lips move. As if testing the words. As if searching for what he means.
But, god, Steve is following along. Of course he is. Hanging onto each one of Eddie's words.
"So, the cashier at the record store got all apprehensive about selling me this tape. Which, I guess makes sense because it's a special edition. Comes with a photo card or whatever, but like—Come on, y'know? If he wanted it so bad, he should'a bought it the moment it dropped. Not my fault he slacks on not just his job, but also his opportunities," Eddie rambles. And, that's right, he's complaining about the music store encounter he had today. Trying to buy some album for some band. Steve got lost part of the way through, so he's not sure who exactly Eddie was getting a tape for. The style of music. But he has most of the information. He just—
Has to squint harder.
So, Steve leans in. As casual as he possibly can. And narrows his eyes at Eddie's lips. The word pretty comes to mind again. Because of course it does. And he can't pull his eyes away, no matter how hard he tries. For some reason, the tips of his fingers tingle a little. Wanting to reach out. Trace his lower lip, right where it sticks out, just above the divot of his chin. Would it be soft, he asks himself. Does he wear chapstick? Steve sighs softly. I wish I could...taste it. His eyes widen, just the tiniest bit. But he ignores that in favor of whatever Eddie is saying. If only he could make it out. He leans impossibly closer.
And there it is again. The soft puffs of warm air. On the tip of his nose. His own lips. Tickling his stubble. Eddie's breath smells like weed and strawberry Tab; a little bit of Kraft macaroni and cheese. Maybe the smallest trace of pepper—
"Uh, Steve?" Eddie nervously calls out. But gets no response. Steve is only a couple inches away from his face. Eyes hooded. Glassy. Zeroed in on Eddie's lips. He's not talking. Doesn't even give a hum. Just...keeps staring.
Eddie sucks in a breath. Eyes darting over Steve's face. He doesn't talk again, hoping maybe Steve will stop. But, nope. In fact, the only thing Eddie gets as acknowledgement for the fact he's stopped talking, is that Steve pouts. Upset. As if his lips no longer moving is some great catastrophe to Steve, some tragedy, some misfortune.
And, Eddie, the awful wreck that he is, can only assume that this means one thing.
Steve wants a kiss. And is, maybe, too chicken shit to close the gap.
So, with no other option. And definitely not wanting to get away from the heated, stirring, calm mask of Steve's face—Eddie presses his mouth against Steve's. Hesitantly smushing their lips together. Dragging his lower lip against Steve's soft scowling one.
And he pulls away. Because Steve isn't doing anything in response.
No, in fact, Steve is extremely expressive now.
Wide eyes. Mouth opened into a silent "Oh." His cheeks are flushed. And as quick as it came upon him, whatever realization that was, fades. Like a cartoon character, Steve's face melts into one of pure infatuation. Mouth lilting. His posture slouching. Eyes going soft against the extreme red of his face.
"Do that again," Steve whispers.
Eddie obliges. And he obliges. And he keeps obliging until they're under a cool top sheet, skin slick with sweat and eyes piercing one another's mouths.
That's when, in the silent air of Eddie's tiny bedroom, Steve admits the greatest thing in the world. "I don't really process when people are talking unless I'm looking at their mouth. I have to read their lips. I didn't—I wasn't trying to kiss you at first, but—" And the motherfucker giggles. "If that's all it took..." Then he's kissing Eddie again. Like it's the last thing he'll ever get to do. And Eddie thinks, If I die from running out of breath doing this, then I've done everything in my life correctly.
So, sure, Steve has a huge staring problem. And he doesn't really listen. And it's something he'll never fix, even if there's a way to.
But he finds that his technique—the thing he's crafted since he was a little boy—no longer works. At least, not on Eddie. Because suddenly, looking at his gorgeous pink lips makes Steve only able to think about one thing: Kissing. And he can't follow along unless he fulfills that want.
Eddie could be in the middle of a deep, all inclusive description of his recent trap in the campaign he's crafting. He could be singing. He could be complaining about some movie he rented. But that doesn't matter. Because he stops talking the moment Steve leans in and kisses him. Kisses like he needs it to live.
And though he rolls his eyes. Huffs a breath. Smirks and barrels on. There's that giddiness, that love pooling in Eddie' heart. Just knowing the effect he has on Steve. And the way he's affected, too, when Steve just whispers, "Sorry, I got lost again. Start over?"
He obliges. And he keeps obliging. And his lips are usually swollen by the time he's finally done rambling.
Steve stares. Eddie talks. And it's the combination of a lifetime.
--------
❤️
951 notes · View notes
lilacsinjuly · 7 months
Text
゚.*・。゚☆ KINKTOBER 2023 ☆゚.*・。゚
➸ DAY THREE: BREAK-IN.
゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*
summary: During yet another fight with your boyfriend, you hear strange noises coming within your new apartment - but don't worry, it's just toji fushiguro breaking and entering to steal your things and fuck your brains out.
CW: fem reader, breaking in, mentions of a toxic relationship, cheating, your boyfriend's a dickhead who cheated first, that doesn't mean i condone cheating tho, mirror sex, fingering, p in v, perv toji, he steals ur underwear, age gap, reader is like early twenties and toji is late thirties, 'slut', 'princess', 'sweetheart', toji takes a video of you and sends it to your boyfriend, i might have forgotten something so please let me know.
word count: 4.9k
likes, comments and reposts are deeply appreciated! <3 enjoy.
masterlist
゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*・。゚゚.*
You lay in the bed of your new apartment in nothing but your boyfriend’s shirt as you texted mindlessly on your phone, not paying any attention to whatever was going on around you but, why would that matter? You were in the comforts of your own apartment and your own room, right? Wrong.
If you hadn’t been paying attention to your boyfriend starting, yet another, argument over text, you might have heard the rustling of items behind your walls.
In your defence, there was a lack of movement or footsteps to be heard. The way Toji moved was inaudibly and stealthily, looking for anything that may be of a rich value.
Unfortunately for him, you had just moved in, so most of your belongings were in boxes, making it significantly harder for him to silently rummage through.
Toji wandered about your apartment purposefully, stumbling upon a framed picture of you and your boyfriend. On one hand, you were smiling gleefully, looking at your boyfriend as though he had galaxies packed away in his eyes. On the other, however, he was looking away, an expression of boredom painted on his face.
Toji couldn’t help but scoff, if he had pulled someone as hot as you, he’d be the one taking the pictures and having them be the first pieces of decor he hung in his apartment, smiling genuinely and showing you off proudly.
Stupidly, he had the amazing idea of knocking the picture frame off the mantle it stood on and ‘accidentally’ stamping on it. Truthfully, he had zero reason to do that. The only things he knew about you was what he had found out pre-breaking into your home, you could’ve been the misery of your relationship causing your boyfriend to appear so unhappy.
Yet, from the way your eyes sparkled to innocently and full of a need to prove yourself, he could immediately tell that wasn’t the truth.
Upon hearing your confused footsteps reaching your bedroom door, Toji panicked and darted for your bathroom.
Dumb thing. He thought. Who in their right mind’s first instinct when they hear a possible intruder is to step outside to check it out, completely defenceless, and without bringing your phone?
You looked around your apartment warily, creaking your door open a touch aiming to see if anyone was outside. “Hello?”
No reply.
Noticing the fallen picture frame, you sighed, walking out to put it back in its place before heading back to your room with relief painted on your face.
Toji let out a breath of ease, relaxing after hearing your door slam shut but not taking any chances of leaving the bathroom so soon. 
Looking around, he noticed your washing basket and smirked. A pair of lacy, pink panties sat at the top of the pile, practically begging for him to shove them into his pocket - and who was he to refuse? His dick twitched in his pants, yet he paid no attention as he pressed his ear against the door aiming to hear whether you were still out there.
Once he was positive that you were back in your room, he grabbed his bag and gently pushed the door open.
It was strange, he’d only ever seen a dull picture that depicted your sad relationship of you, yet he couldn’t get the image of you out of his mind, specifically, the image of you bouncing on his cock endlessly and wrapping your lips around his dick. He’d hardly heard your voice, yet he could hear your moans so perfectly. He was perfectly able to picture your body in such lewd, shameless positions even though you had no idea he existed.
Toji was a man driven by two things, his heart which yearned for wealth and fortune, and his dick which yearned for women like you.
He tried to push away his disgusting thoughts, yet they were overwhelming. He scolded himself mentally, who fantasises over a woman they’ve never locked eyes with? Toji felt truly pathetic. 
Over in your room, you sniffled painfully, reading the recent messages from your boyfriend, who was blaming you for the fact that he had cheated. Despite this, you were still wasting all your effort apologising. Eventually, he would want you back, once he was bored with the girl he had cheated with, however, you still cared for him nevertheless. 
Your throat was tired from all the crying, so you decided to exhaustively move out of bed to grab a drink, your feet were light on the floor, hardly making a sound - and hardly warning Toji of your upcoming presence.
By the time he had realised you were coming, your door was half way coming and you had already caught a glimpse of his broad, noticeable figure. 
When Toji’s cold eyes met your fearful ones, his heart began to pound with swarms of different emotions. Firstly, he felt annoyed with himself for not noticing that you were coming until it was too late. He also felt nervous that he had fucked up the robbery, yet confident that he could twist himself out of the situation he had put himself in. 
Yet, there was another part of him that caused his heart to stop, not with annoyance or nervousness, but with an infatuation with the fearful look in your teared up eyes. An obsession with the way your thighs looked from peeking out under your shirt. He couldn’t take his eyes off you - you looked so much better than the photo on the mantle. 
You were frozen in your space. Your mind was flooded with questions. How didn’t you hear him? How long has he been here for? Did he knock the photograph down? Why couldn’t you take your traitorous eyes off his body which looked as though it had been sculpted by gods? Why on Earth was there that familiar ache in between your legs when you looked at him? 
Realistically, the best thing to do in this scenario when you’re defenceless facing a man who could, most likely, take you out with only a finger, would be to scream. However, your throat had gone even more dry than before and you felt like you couldn’t use your voice - even if you wanted to.
Of course you wanted to, a man had just broken into your apartment and was carrying a bag full of what was probably your stuff, judging by the open boxes you were certain you had taped shut. Also, even despite your initial lustful thoughts, you were committed to your boyfriend 
Your boyfriend who hadn’t picked up his phone in a while, even though you were mid-trying to sort things out between the two of you and salvage whatever was left of your relationship, probably because he was having sex with the same woman you were arguing about. 
Both of you just stared at each other for a while, trying to find words.
You were the first to speak up. “You need to leave, my boyfriend will be here soon and I swear to god he’ll beat the shit out of you.” You attempted to intimidate.
Toji only tilted his head at you with a false look of comfort etched onto his features as he concealed his smile at how cute you were when you were trying to scare him off. “Hm, you’re boyfriend, huh?” He started making his way over to you at a leisurely pace. “He got nothin’ to do with how puffy your eyes look? Or why you’ve spent the entire time I’ve been here cryin’?”
His bold, yet truthful, assumptions startled you, and caused some sort of realisation to stir inside your mind. Now, you didn’t want to think negatively of your boyfriend. He used to be so sweet until his kind words turned bitter and his cute jealousy turned controlling and hypocritical, considering he’d sleep with whoever’s eyes would linger.
“I’m not gonna hurt you, princess, not like this so-called boyfriend of yours.”
Trying to keep your composure was the last thing on your mind. “You don’t know anything about me and my boyfriend, and don’t call me that.” You snapped at him, trying to defend your horrible excuse of a boyfriend, even if his words provided you with a sense of disturbing comfort. Toji only laughed and rolled his eyes. 
Testing his luck, he got closer and closer to you. “You’re right, I don’t. All I do know, is that if i was your boyfriend, I wouldn’t leave you alone in a new apartment in this shithole of a city to spend your entire night crying whilst ‘m off fuckin’ some other girl. I mean, that’s what he’s doing, right? Haven’t heard your phone go off in a while.”
You realised that this current moment, where a potentially dangerous man was standing in front of you ready to possibly kill you at any moment, was probably not an appropriate time to rethink every moment you ever spent with your boyfriend and to contemplate whether waiting for him to reply was the best thing for you. However, when even a potentially dangerous man can recognise the present toxicity of your relationship, it’s difficult not to. 
Even so, you couldn’t let your vulnerability slip through any cracks. Now, you were quite certain he wasn’t going to hurt you. In a strange way, he made you feel protected and that scared you slightly. Yet, the way he spoke to you, it gave you a sense of security you had never felt with your boyfriend.
“I’m not gonna hurt you, princess, not like this so-called boyfriend of yours.”
Truly, you believed him. Perhaps that's why you let your guard down.
“If you were my boyfriend, hm?” You tilted your head up at him, a seemingly innocent smile playing on your lips. “You don’t even know me, yet you’re already fantasising about being my boyfriend. Plus, I don’t even know your name.” 
This surprised Toji, though, he wasn’t going to deny that your newfound confidence was incredibly alluring. He took a couple more steps towards you without even knowing, like he was already caught in your trap. However, he already understood that he was addicted to you without even a single taste.
Toji replied with a curt, cold laugh. “It’s Toji, and you’re talking a lot for a woman who’s flirting with a criminal yet doesn’t even have the guts to break-up with her boyfriend.”
Neither of you had realised the close proximity between your bodies until the final syllable fell from Toji’s lips. You felt suffocated, yet not trapped. You couldn’t find your breath but in this moment, it was the last thing you needed when his lips were right there.
“Yet here you are, breaking into my house, clearly desperate to fuck me, and getting so pissed off at the sight of my boyfriend you broke the picture of us.” You deduced. “That is what happened, right?”
His lips twitched but the rest of his face remained stoic, refusing to portray any hidden emotion he was feeling.
“You’re just a pervy old man desperate for some pussy. The sight of me smiling with my boyfriend pissed you off that much, hm? And yet, I’m the slut flirting with a criminal.” 
Toji had you up against the wall in a matter of seconds, his hand wrapped around your throat, not hard enough to hurt but hard enough to send the right signals.
“You proud of yourself, princess? Yeah? You enjoy riling me up, tryna get a reaction out of me?” Your lips were parted in a silent moan before they morphed into a victorious smirk. Toji barked out a humourless laugh. “Of course you do, this is the reaction you wanted, wasn’t it. You’re a fuckin’ slut princess, a bratty little girl begging to be put in her place. Now, you listen to me, okay? Go and wait for me in your room. You take off that shirt as well, alright?”
His grip on you loosened and he took a few short paces back. You nodded, and his sharp eyes followed you as you walked into your room and waited for him patiently, sitting on the edge of your bed.
Toji’s mind was plagued with second thoughts.
On one hand, he knew he had to fuck you the moment he saw you. He was plagued with infatuation and lewd thoughts of all the positions he’d see you in. On the other, this was not what he came here to do. It benefitted him little to fuck you mid-robbery instead of doing what he came here to do and making money off it. 
Pacing around your apartment, it took him no more than ten seconds to shove those thoughts away, knowing that you were waiting patiently for him in nothing but your underwear. He scolded himself mentally for getting distracted, dragging a hand frustratedly down his face, before opening your door and leaning against the doorframe. He smirked, taking your figure in and ran his tongue across his lips before beginning to make his way up to you.
You were sitting on the edge of your bed, your legs pressed together tightly due to the guilt swarming your entire body. You had a boyfriend, what were you doing sat half-naked in front of a man who had just broken into your house.
Toji walked up to you, his footsteps suddenly audible and heavy on your ears. The sound was intimidating, you felt like you couldn’t breathe in the moments that he was walking up to you. Each time the sound of his boots hit the ground, you heard the sound of shouting at you to get out and beg for your boyfriend’s forgiveness for even thinking of committing such a sinful act.
…Yet, your boyfriend had never made the feeling in between your legs so intense. And Toji knew this. 
“Your boyfriend don’t make you feel good enough, sweetheart? You gotta fuck a stranger who broke into your house instead?” He cooed, in a wicked and cunning way, like he tried to sound gentle, yet you could only hear the disgusting and lustful thoughts that were rotting his mind.
Nevertheless, you shook your head. You had admitted to the man that broke into your home that your boyfriend can’t even make you come. Feeling disgusted with yourself, you lowered your head in shame.
Disappointed, Toji tutted in disapproval, taking his index finger and placing it under your chin, raising your head to meet his displeased eyes.
“You keep your eyes on mine. You got that, sweetheart?” He chastised. His thumb parted your lips and he slipped it into your mouth, you complied, sucking gently as you nodded at his request, staring up at him with wide, lust-filled eyes.
Toji couldn’t believe his luck. How on Earth had he managed to conveniently break into your house? The moment his eyes met yours, his entire life, everything he had worked hard for, everything he cared about suddenly meant nothing. And now, as he watched you take his thumb into your mouth and sucked it whilst keeping eye contact, just like he had asked, he felt this obsession of his magnify by hundreds. He had no clue how he’d ever move on after this - but maybe he didn’t have to.
Just the thought of your (future) ex-boyfriend fumbling so hard made him want to laugh but also kill him for breaking your precious heart. Yet, there was no need to worry, as Toji was here to stitch it back up again and keep it for himself. How could someone be so stupid as to fuck up their chance with you? It confused him, pissed him off, yet excited him all at the same time.
Moving away from you, Toji went to sit in front of your headboard. He signalled for you to come over to him, to which you obeyed with little hesitation.
That's when Toji noticed the conveniently placed mirror in front of your bed. His reflection stared back at him, watching the smirk that invaded his face.
For the most part, your room was bland and messy, having just moved in. Toji couldn’t have thanked you enough for having put up your mirror right in time for him to fuck the life out of you infront of it.
“You put that shit there on purpose? Wanted to watch me fuck ya brains out, princess?” He questioned.
You were on all fours in front of him, one of your soft, smaller hands placed gently over his muscled thigh. Looking up at him, you smirked. You sat up so that you were now on your knees before shrugging at him with the sole purpose of winding him up. He rolled his eyes at you for what felt the one millionth time that night, yet that didn’t stop the genuine smile taking over his features.
He flipped you over with ease, so that you were sitting in between his legs and staring at him through the reflection of the mirror. 
Biting your bottom lip, Toji looked at you with eyes devoid of any signs of warmth or amiability, and yet all you could think to do was press your thighs together.
Toji began to kiss down your neck and towards your shoulder, before he got to the strap of your bra. “I don’t think we need this, do we princess?”
A soft moan fell from your lips at the feeling of his voice mumbling against your skin. His hand began to trail further down your body, and as he reached the hem of your panties, he snapped the fabric against your hip. “Or these.” He continued with that same, low voice that reverberated through your skin and sent your mind into a questionable, clouded state. You shook your head in agreement, and lifted your hips up to assist him as he took them off you, tossing them to the side before proceeding to do the same with your bra.
Neither of you wanted to wait any longer, both of you just as desperate as the other to feel one another.  “Can I touch you, princess?” He asked, though he could feel himself shaking from holding back. 
You could only spew out a mixture of yeses and his name whilst you nodded profusely, desperate for him to please you. And who was he to deny you? Not even a man with more dignity, respect and self restraint than him could say no to someone like you. 
Spreading your legs apart, he muttered lowly, “Fuck, princess, look at this pussy, all wet f’me.” You could see him smirking in the reflection of the mirror. Toji released his hold on your legs and grabbed your arms instead, replacing where his hands were previously with your own. “You keep your legs up and spread for me, okay? If they close, I won't be happy, sweetheart. You got that?”
You nodded, keeping your hands on the back of your legs, keeping them open for him. One of his hands snaked around and held onto yours, in order to make sure you didn’t close them. The other, however, ran up and down the fat of your thigh.
It moved across your stomach and past your breasts at a slow, torturous pace. Your pussy was aching and begging for him, for any kind of stimulation yet he carried on with a sinister smirk. Once he had reached your face, he cradled it gently, causing you to look up at him. He captured your lips into a slow kiss, used only as a distraction as the hand over yours moved towards your pussy before he broke away and dipped a harsh finger into your hole. You gasped at the unexpected sensation, so he took the opportunity to shove two of his thick fingers into your mouth.
Gagging slightly at the penetration, you looked up at him with blurry eyes. Your tongue moved around his fingers causing his dick to twitch in his pants. His face morphed into one of fascination and obsession. He couldn’t believe you were letting him fuck you and he’d be damned if he was going to let you go.
Removing his fingers from both your mouth and your pussy, he took the saliva coated fingers and ran them through your, already soaking cunt. You let out an alluring moan as your hips bucked up into his fingers. His other hand, went back to its previous position of helping you keep your legs spread open and up for him.
His fingers dragged through your folds and lightly grazed over your clit resulting in a whimper falling from your lips. “Please put them in.” You asked, voice shaky and whining, not far above a whisper.
“Well, seeing as though you asked so nicely, princess.” The tone of his voice was dripping with sarcasm and laced with mischief.
At once, he shoved two fingers deep inside your aching hole. The unexpectancy of him putting two in caused you to attempt to close your legs whilst you thrashed in his hold, moaning pathetically when he began to pump them slowly. 
Taking his spare hand, he slapped your thigh harshly. “The fuck did I tell ya about closing your fucking legs, princess?” 
Opening out your legs again, muttering a weak apology, Toji decided that he could no longer trust you to keep them open. Using both of his arms, he kept your legs spread as his fingers were still knuckle-deep inside of your hole. 
Now, when you stared up into the mirror, you could see both of Toji’s arms separating your legs from ever touching as one of his hands was preoccupied with bullying your hole and the other was toying with your clit. “Much better, ain’t it princess?” he laughed, his hands relentlessly bringing you closer to your orgasm. “Now, keep these pretty little eyes right on where I'm playing with ya cunt, understand? If you disappoint me again, I won’t be as nice.”
“Mkay Toji, I promise.” Your eyes stared into his, watching his scarred lip curl into a satisfied smile.
“Good girl, now let me play with this slutty pussy of yours.”
He began to kiss down your neck, yet his wicked eyes never left yours. Not even as he began sucking bruises onto your skin, claiming you as his own.
His fingers thrust themselves into you at a relentless pace, desperate to pull your orgasm from you and to make you feel the way he felt from just looking at you.
You couldn’t stop moaning in his hold. The feeling of his thick, long fingers plunging in and out of your aching cunt, reaching places you hadn’t ever been able to reach on your own, sent you spiralling, unable to think about anything other than his quick and skilled fingers hitting your sweet spot over and over again.
Toji was in a trance as he watched his fingers pump into you and he wanted nothing more than to watch you cum on his fingers. 
His speed was unforgiving and otherworldly. Never had you felt so full and pleasured just from someone’s fingers, but then again, you had only ever been with your boyfriend who couldn’t even make you come with his dick.
Everything was too much. His thumb on your clit sending sparks through your entire body, his fingers thrusting deep inside of you, the sight of your pussy dripping and his strong arms between your legs in the reflection of the mirror. You couldn’t focus or breathe. It felt so amazing.
Soon, you were coming all over his fingers, your hips lifting in the air as you bucked up into his hand whilst you dripped over your sheets and his hand. You were ninety percent sure you’d never be able to go back to any other man or just your own hand after having a taste of his.
All guilt and regret left your body as you moaned and writhed in his grip.
Toji cursed as he watched your face contort with pleasure and your pussy clench around his fingers. If his cock wasn’t aching to be freed, he was positive he’d finger you like that for the rest of the night.
You collapsed, exhausted, in his arms. As you tried to catch your breath, Toji brought his own fingers to his lips and groaned as he tasted you. “Fuck, princess, I’m gonna have to eat ya out another time, cause fuck do you taste good, but I really need to fuck you right now.”
You laughed, still breathless. “You planning on coming back then?”
“Sweetheart, I don’t plan on leaving you for a moment. You’re mine now, you got that princess?”
Before you could answer, he captures your lips in a kiss, but judging from the approving moan you let out against his lips, you had no issue with being his.
Toji grabbed your hips and lifted you over his lap so that you were now straddling him. 
Quickly, you removed his shirt and he was fast to take off his pants as well so that he sat underneath you as naked and vulnerable as you were.
Your eyes couldn’t remove themselves from his dick. It was so incredibly long, veiny and thick. The biggest you had ever seen. You were nervous to have him inside of you, but any fear was overshadowed by the immense desire to have him fuck you.
Despite you being on top, Toji had every bit of control. His hands were strong as they gripped securely onto your hips, grinding you against the tip of his dick. You whimpered slightly as your clit grazed his tip, still slightly overstimulated from your previous orgasm. However, this didn’t stop him from shoving his tip inside, causing you to whine slightly and moan out his name.
Slowly, he began to sheath his entire dick inside of you. Your hands reached for his hair and tugged gently. 
Once he was fully inside of you, he wasted no time in picking up the pace until he was bouncing on his cock at an unbearable speed. 
You felt completely fucked dumb as he bounced you up and down on his dick, your head unable to support itself so you buried it in his shoulder. Your moans and words were fragmented yet loud, unable to keep up with his pace.
Unexpectedly, your phone began to go off, and you both immediately knew who it was. Toji had stopped pummeling his cock in and out of you, causing you to push yourself up to look him in the eye.
“Jus’ ignore it, Toji. I don’t care ‘bout him anymore, just want your dick, please-”
Without warning, Toji flipped you both over. Now, you were underneath him with your leg propped up and his dick back inside of you. His entire demeanour had shifted, as though he had something more to prove despite having said it all already.
Grabbing your phone, he forced you to open it. He was still as he read the messages your soon-to-be ex was sending. His tongue rolled over his teeth in frustration and annoyance, before suddenly he opened up your camera and began to plunge his dick into you at a seemingly faster speed than before with your camera pointed at where his dick met your pussy.
He was only recording for a few seconds before he hit send, silenced your phone and shoved it back onto your bedside table.
You were too fucked-out to argue even if you wanted to. A small fraction of you felt some sort of satisfaction knowing you had gotten your revenge.
The other part of you was simply too focused on the feeling of his dick hitting that same spot within you relentlessly. 
Your leg was thrown over his shoulder, allowing him to bury himself far deeper than before. “Sh-shit! You feel tha, sweetheart? Feel me all deep inside of you, hm?”
You could barely form a coherent response other than a loud whine followed by: “So fuckin deep, Toji!”
His hair was sticking to his forehead as he stared at you through half lidded eyes. He adored this expression on your face and he adored the fact that he was the one causing it even more, so much so, that he was so close to falling off the edge.
“Gonna cum, princess.”
All it took was the feeling of you coming around his cock, your tight pussy squeezing him even tighter, sucking him in and reluctant to let him go, for him to pull out and finish over your chest, covering you in his cum.
This time, it was his phone that he grabbed from his trouser pockets from the side of your bed that he snapped a photo with, before he collapsed next to you.
Both of you were heaving, struggling to find your breaths.
Strenuously, you reached over to grab your phone from the bedside table.
23 new messages.
You looked over at Toji, exasperated. “You just had to send him a video, didn’t you.”
Typing a quick I don’t want to be with you anymore message before hitting the block button, you dropped your phone somewhere carelessly before turning to face his smug expression.
“If it wasn’t for me, he’d be the one fuckin’ you right now, princess, so I think a ‘thank you’ is in order.”
Laughing, you replied. “If it wasn’t for you breaking into my apartment, you mean. Oh, and by the way, I want my stuff back. Including my underwear that I saw in your pocket.”
For the first time, Toji’s face showed an expression that wasn’t cold and disdainful as he laughed at your remark.
note: this shit is almost 5k omg and i dont even like toji. toji hater until the day i die however i'd pay to suck him off.
1K notes · View notes
xensilverquill · 9 months
Text
Amigurumi/Crochet Toy 101 + Resources
Tumblr media
Noticed a couple folks in my tags mentioning that they wanted to learn or wished they knew how to crochet amigurumi. So here's a quick and dirty little how-to guide with resources I threw together? Hope it helps!
Tools + Materials
Crochet is one of those hobbies that is actually relatively cheap to get into. Here is a basic list of what you'll need to get started. You can find most of these at any craft store or even Walmart.
(1) Yarn (Required)
Yarns come in a variety of weights (sizes) and fibers. I recommend a soft, worsted weight acrylic yarn (indicated by a number "4" and "medium" on the yarn label) for your first few projects.  
Tumblr media
Image
(2) Crochet Hook (Required)
These come in a lot of sizes and styles, and what size you'll use will depend on your yarn weight and how tight you want your stitches to be. I'd recommend buying just one hook to start with rather than a larger set. Metal hooks with ergonomic rubber handles are easiest for beginners (and on your wrists longterm, lol). A 5.0 MM/Size H or a 4.50 MM/Size G works best for making amigurumi with worsted weight yarn.
Tumblr media
(3) Polyfil/Stuffing (Required)
For stuffing your project.
Tumblr media
(4) Yarn Needle (Required)
Most crochet projects require sewing to one degree or another. Yarn needles are distinguished from regular sewing needles by their larger size, larger eye, and blunter tip. Yarn needles may be straight, or they may be angled at the tip (i.e. a darning yarn needle).
Tumblr media
(5) Scissors (Required)
Any sharp, medium-sized pair of scissors will do for cutting your yarn.
Tumblr media
(6) Sewing Pins (Recommended)
For holding parts in place as you sew them on.
Tumblr media
(7) Stitch Marker (Recommended)
Many amigurumi projects are worked in rows of continuous rounds, and stitch markers can be used to mark the beginning or end of these rounds. They can also be used to mark areas of interest in your project or to secure your project to keep it from becoming accidentally unraveled. I strongly reccomend getting split ring ones. Scrap pieces of yarn also work in a pinch as stitch markers.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
(8) Counter (Recommended)
For keeping track of your rows as you work a pattern.
Tumblr media
(9) Safety Eyes (Recommended)
Most amigurumi will require eyes of some sort. Safety eyes (you can find these in various sizes in the doll section of any craft store) will give your project a polished look, but you can also use buttons, felt, or even embroider the eye details on your amigurumi.
Tumblr media
(10) Stuffing Stick (Recommended)
For getting your stuffing into hard-to-reach spots. A chopstick or wooden skewer works very well for this.
Tumblr media
Basic Crochet Stitches + Amigurumi Techniques
Most crochet patterns are built from a few basic stitches. Before attempting any larger project, I recommend getting comfortable with these stitches by making a few small, flat pot holders out of each basic stitch. A lot of crochet is pure muscle memory and practice, and this is a great way to start.
There are also a few techniques specific to making amirugumi that will be helpful for you to know. You can find any number of free videos/tutorials online. Below are links to a few videos that I found helpful when I was learning to crochet.
Tumblr media
Image
How to Make a Slip Knot
Single Crochet (+ Starting Chain and How to Count Stitches)
Half Double Crochet
Double Crochet
Triple Crochet
How to Keep Starting Chain from Twisting
Magic Ring
Ultimate Finish
Invisible Finish
Invisible Decrease
Beginner Amigurumi Patterns
These were the first three patterns I learned in the process of teaching myself how to make amigurumi. I recommend working them in the order they are listed. The first two links have step-by-step instructional videos and will help ease you into learning to read amigurumi patterns. All of these patterns are free, and there are many more free patterns out there as well. Have fun!
Amigurumi Ball
Amigurumi Whale
Amigurumi Stegosaurus
3K notes · View notes
sexlapis · 4 months
Note
i know requests are closed and im sorry but i need this so i dont forget 💖 actor!toji looking at edits on live and hes like “so yall see me like this” and the fans go wild
actor!toji on live!
okay i’ll make an exception once.
𝜗𝜚 actor!toji (x implied gn!reader)
sfw, crack, tiktok (bc that’s it’s own warning), suggestive, horny toji fans, toji has reading glasses, petnames (‘kid’) he’s a little rude but when is he not :), old man toji <3
〆(・∀・) : me after not writing abt actor toji for like a month 😊🤗
masterlists
actor toji masterlist
Tumblr media
*
“hey, everybody,” toji said, waving to camera as if he didn’t fumble and struggle in front of his fans for the past ten minutes trying to get his phone to stand up securely. he looks cute, dressed in a navy blue hoodie with nothing underneath and his dark hair was a messy mop atop his head.
now he just sits in his chair at his dining room table, watching the viewer count rise and rise to absolutely ridiculous numbers.
“fourty thousan-fifty thou-sixty thousand?! didn’t know i had so many fans..jesus christ…”
honestly, toji had no idea what he was doing and he was a tiny bit nervous. this was his first ever “live” (something that he did not know even existed until you told him) and he had no idea how to entertain his fans or what they really wanted. but they seem pleased with him just staring at the camera in confusion and admiring his handsome face.
toji proceeds to read some of the comments in the rapid moving chat of chaos. here, starts the beginning of his own demise.
many comments are sweet, kind, praising him for his talent and acting skills, some were just spamming their country flags and names, a rare male fan is asking to see his guns collection, others asking about his upcoming projects but the majority of them are…not exactly PG in the slightest.
toji’s eyes could bulge out of damn skull at some of the explicitly and complete shamelessness of his fans. he knew they found him attractive, but this was a whole other level of depravity.
“what the fuck…” toji whispers in awe, mouth agape as his eyes scan through the chat, his eyes being fed with the most desperate and thirsty comments he has even read, “you guys are sumthin’ else…”
his one sentence just pours fuel on the, already blazing and large, fire, the chat moving so fast that is starts to lag.
“why’d i even speak..”
he actually takes time to read each comment that he can see (and stomach) and one of them catches his eye.
“watch your edits on tiktok? i have edits? what’s an edit?”
the chat blows up even more, commenters begging and begging him to watch these…edits.
“alright, alright, i’ll watch these “edits”,” toji says to the camera, before pulling out another phone, one that is clearly quite old, jagged edges and a cracked camera, a raggedy phone case and just overall not in the best condition it could be in.
“‘what is that ancient ass device’ eh? this is my main phone,” he replies to a comment, showing his phone to the camera to his fans can see, “‘s fine, works perfectly. and it’s not “ancient”. it’s actually a nokia. pft, dumbass kids.”
toji can feel himself being flamed in the chat. even more so when he pulls out his reading glasses.
“yeah, ‘m fuckin’ old. jesus.”
he squints, scrolling on his beaten up phone with his index finger, “y’know, ion even really use tiktok, i only got it so _____ can send me videos of whatever the fuck. i swear, that kid sends me a million videos per day..” toji sighs, smiling at the thought of you, “ahh, they’re just so dumb.”
toji, after a long time of searching through trial and error and directions from his fans, eventually finds the search page of tiktok.
“alright, what’d i type in then? just ‘toji’? ‘toji fushiguro’?” he looks for answers in the chat, but find himself getting frustrated at the lack of actual responses to his question. he tuts, “i’m just gonna search ‘toji fushiguro edits’ and see what happens.”
he does just that and the results are…very interesting.
right in front of his very eyes are miles and miles of edits of himself, created by his fans, their depravity exposed for him to see, some of who were probably watching him at this very moment.
“jeeeeesus christ. ‘dunno what i even expected, honestly,” he scrolls through them, audios changing constantly as he does so, his eyes wide and wondering, “i’m actually impressed…”
toji pressed on one, and he watches it, the edit flashing in the reflection of his glasses as he watches. his open mouth slowly turns into a smirk of amusement and all out disbelief, the audio of the video being something about… ‘needing someone older’?
“so you guys see me like this?” he asked, expression incredulous and he breathes out a small chuckle, “buncha little fuckin’ freaks.”
the chat seems to like that. a lot.
his chat is once again flooded with comments from hell…hell for people driven purely by lust, that is.
toji huffs, “how old is this person anyway?”
he seemingly clicks on the account and reads their username. well, almost.
“‘tojis little cu-woah!” he almost drops his phone out of his hand, jaw on the floor, “how old are you! sixteen?! toji looks to the camera, eyebrows furrowed before slamming his phone on the table and pointing at his fans through the screen, “go do your homework! and be in bed by nine. actually, no scratch that, eight! christ…sixteen years old, oh my god…”
he continues to mutter to himself, completely baffled at how some of his fans are so young and just so…out of their minds. his skin crawls at the thought of a sixteen year old liking him in such a way.
toji shivers, “god, where are your parents?” he questions and continues to search through the edits, before finding one that looks safe, innocent and PG.
he was proven wrong however, when the audio was a woman rapping about being put in full nelsons-
“okay, that’s enough!” he slams his phone down again on the table, “i’ve seen enough,” and then he reaches for the camera, not even caring about his viewers. he mutters a, “crazy fuckin’ kids” before abruptly ending his “live” and going to take a nap.
*
the next day, you have sent him over ten videos on tiktok, all of them being edits of him from the day of the live, most of them containing the clip of when he called his fans, quote, a “buncha little fuckin’ freaks” unquote.
toji sighs at them, secretly entertained that you must be watching these deviant edits of him too.
*
Tumblr media
〆(・∀・) : no i have not forgotten abt actor toji
taglist: @tiredslepz | @hayatslife | @shxyxyxxxx | @snowprincesa1 | @laylasbunbunny | @mimiemie | @ncentic | @rosesored | @imover-18 | @gintokhi | @suzuperstarr | @lostgxrlblog | @jallie10 | @nnsav | @bunnyx-sakura | @bubbabobabubbles | @ladytamayolover | @keiva1000 | @morgyyyyyyy | @studiecoherence | @earth2fae | ce-namonreads | @ib4ryuguji | @hisjaegerist | @basiloverthyme | @sweet-kiwi | @sayitowshi | @iovemytoru | @thecompletechaosmaster | @sugutoad | @inumakiiz | @uzxotic | @1meshugge1 | @kunikuzushisbeloved (sorry some could not be tagged for some reason </3)
868 notes · View notes
satoruhour · 9 months
Note
if you haven’t done it yet! aftercare with gojo?
a/n: oh i just HAD to write this thank u for the prompt mirah <3
warnings: unprotected sex, creampie / breeding kink but it’s described as briefly as possible
Tumblr media
he used to think aftercare was sort of boring? i feel it’s because he never really found the right person so he usually does the bare minimum, cleaning his partner up, getting them water and making them feel comfortable
but he always felt empty inside after they fall asleep, always keeping his distance no matter what
that was until he got together with you and he feels like he’s been missing out on so much
i have a headcanon he’s so unused to affection that his partner will be the one to introduce aftercare to him
like foreplay, aftercare can anything you want it to be!
and he laughs at your comment, fingers shaking from how much he liked you when you sink into his side with the tv droning on at the back
gojo loves all forms of aftercare but i feel he would love a few minutes of cuddling and skin to skin contact before you actually clean up
always has a packet of wet tissues on the bedside table and a glass of sweet sweet tea
it’s kinda gross bc of how sweet it is and if you have a sweet tooth too then good for you
but otherwise it’s insanely sweet, and he uses his cursed energy to heat up the tea!!! waow
but if you dont want hot tea then u gotta drink lukewarm tea sorry
he always carries you. dont try to fight him but he loves to take care of you after sex. loves to wash ur hair and body and you’ll do it back to him :)
sometimes it escalates to another round but most times he likes the two of you in the quietness of the bathroom and just the swooshes of the water
he doesn’t prefer the bathtub or shower more but he’ll pick what you like and go along with it
if you still have energy he likes to watch random youtube videos like cat memes or funny videos (the ones he picks are not exactly funny however…)
you two rarely watch movies bc they’re really long but if you do you’re usually the one to fall asleep bc gojo is naturally replenishing himself with his technique. and also he likes to watch you sleep
creep
he takes photos of you when you’re asleep in his arms and he shows it to you the next day but one day youre suggesting to him that maybe he can fall asleep first
and when he stops his CT it’s like … woah. he falls asleep so soundly in your arms that it’s adorable and now he’s more open to being tucked under your arms to succumb to sleep first
that time also allows you to say your confessions softly and to admire him without any teasing
this time is very soft and delicate and intimate and satoru thinks it’s his favourite, but then again every moment with you is a blessing ♡
the air is thick and musky with sex, skin laced with tear stains while gojo continues to rock into you long after you’ve cummed, moans and pants leaving your mouth with whispers of satoru’s name. the kisses he litters there makes your skin tingle before he’s releasing in you, and it’s thick, filling you up while his lips meet yours passionately, muttering confessions with a smile.
“baby…” gojo pokes your cheek, your expression close to pure bliss from the orgasm that he’s a little worried but he knows you’re being dramatic. it’s something you picked up from him. “you okay?”
your eyes crack open a bit as your hands make their way to his cheeks, feeling the fat of his cheeks fill up your hands when he smiles. with a free hand, his hand engulfs yours, planting a kiss to it and the smile-turned-grin he gives you is blinding before he decides it’s been too long that he’s kissed you.
slipping out of you, he pulls you closer with an arm while the other brushes the sweat-filled hair from your forehead, lips capturing yours softly. you move together, languid and slow and satoru cannot stop smiling as he pulls away, drunk on you.
“let’s get you clean, hm?” gojo plants one more peck on you after twenty minutes; twenty minutes of talking in whispers and kissing (satoru’s doing). he waits for your outstretched arms, hooking his own under your neck and knees just as you plead for him to carry you. “such a big baby.”
you giggle, mumbling a soft yeah before pecking his cheek, holding his stare so full of ardent love that your heart feels like it might actually stop — it almost does when you feel the cold water from the shower head hit your back and you jump with a yelp.
satoru laughs, “my bad, heater wasn’t on.”
“bastard.”
“you certainly don’t think i’m one by how much you were screaming my name just n—”
you groan as his giggles only increase in volume, swooping you up easily before it falls silent and it’s only the sound of the shower filling your ears.
soon, the night is calm, something that isn’t the case usually with gojo, but you’ve casted such a deep spell on the strongest — the weakest when with you — that all he can do is watch your content face and humming voice with a silent love, fingers gliding through his white locks with shampoo and suds.
recently, satoru finds that he’s starting to smell more and more like you.
Tumblr media
i have chronic loving-gojo-satoru-like-an-clinically-insane-person disease
2K notes · View notes
whumptober · 2 years
Text
Whumptober 2022
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Welcome to Whumptober 2022, in its fifth year of running!
To those of you who participated last year, welcome back! To everyone new, WELCOME!
Please make sure to read the Event Info carefully, as most of your questions will be answered there already. For everything else, you are welcome to come to our ask box or ask questions in our Discord server here.
This year’s AO3 Collection can be found here.
With that being said, we’re very excited to see the community come together once more and be a wild, chaotic bunch of creators and consumers of whump. Go wild with the prompts, and support your fellow creators, see what juicy whump they’ve created too! We wish you all the fun!
(All 31 Themes + Prompts, Event Information and FAQs are posted below the cut!)
Whumptober 2022 Prompt List
No. 1 A LITTLE OUT OF THE ORDINARY
Adverse Effects | Unconventional Restraints | "This wasn't supposed to happen"
No. 2 NOWHERE TO RUN
Cornered | Caged | Confrontation
No. 3 A HAIR’S BREADTH FROM DEATH
Gun to Temple | “Say goodbye.” | Impaled
No. 4 DEAD ON YOUR FEET
Hidden Injury | Waking Up Disoriented | Can’t Pass Out
No. 5 EVERY WHUMPEE’S NEEDS
Blood Loss | Running Out of Air | Hyperthermia
No. 6 PROOF OF LIFE
Ransom Video | “I’ve got a pulse” | Screams from Across the Hall
No. 7 THE WAY YOU SHAKE AND SHIVER
Shaking Hands | Seizures | Silent Panic Attack
No. 8 EVERYTHING HURTS AND I’M DYING
Stomach Pain | Head Trauma | Back from the Dead
No. 9 THE VERY NOISY NIGHT
Sleeping in Shifts | Tossing and Turning | Caught in a Storm
No. 10 POOR UNFORTUNATE SOULS
Taser | Whipping | Waterboarding
No. 11 “911, WHAT’S YOUR EMERGENCY?”
Sloppy Bandages | Self-Done First Aid | Makeshift Splint
No. 12 WHAT COULD GO WRONG?
“Mayday, mayday!” | Cave In | Rusty Nail
No. 13 CAN’T MAKE AN OMELETTE WITHOUT BREAKING A FEW LEGS
Fracture | Dislocation | “Are you here to break me out?”
No. 14 DIE A HERO OR LIVE LONG ENOUGH TO BECOME A VILLAIN
Desperate Measures | Failed escape | “I’ll be right behind you.”
No. 15 EMOTIONAL DAMAGE
Lies | New Scars | Breathing through the Pain
No. 16 NO WAY OUT
Mind Control | Paralytic Drugs | “No one’s coming.”
No. 17 HANGING BY A THREAT
Breaking Point | Stress Positions | Reluctant Caretaker
No. 18 LET’S BREAK THE ICE
"Just get it over with." |  Treading Water | "Take my Coat"
No. 19 ENOUGH IS ENOUGH
Knees Buckling | Repeatedly Passing Out | Head Lolling
No. 20 IT’S BEEN A LONG DAY
Going into Shock | Fetal Position | Prisoner Trade
No. 21 FAMOUS LAST WORDS
Coughing up Blood | “You’re safe now.” | “Take me instead.”
No. 22 PICK YOUR POISON
Toxic | Withdrawal | Allergic Reaction
No. 23 AT THE END OF THEIR ROPE
Forced to Kneel | Tied to a Table | “Hold them down.”
No. 24 FIGHT, FLIGHT OR FREEZE
Blood Covered Hands | Catatonic | “I don’t want to do this anymore.”
No. 25 SILENCE IS GOLDEN
Lost Voice | Duct Tape | “You better start talking.”
No. 26 NO ONE LEFT BEHIND
Separated | Rope Burns | “Why did you save me?”
No. 27 PUSHED TO THE LIMIT
Muffled Screams | Stumbling | Magical Exhaustion
No. 28 IT'S JUST THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG
Anger Born of Worry | Punching the Wall | Headache
No. 29 WHAT DOESN'T KILL ME…
Sleep Deprivation | Defiance | “Better me than you.”
No. 30 NOTE TO SELF: DON'T GET KIDNAPPED
Manhandled | Hair Grabbing | “Please don’t touch me.”
Alternative Prompts List
No. 31 A LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL
Comfort | Bedside Vigil | “You can rest now.”
Ringing Ears
Whimpering
Dazed and Confused
Touch Starved
Ambushed
Sensory Overload
Protective
Made to Watch
Quicksand
Adrenaline Crash
Stabbed
Carried to Safety
Crutches
Emergency Blanket
Tears
Event Info & Rules
~ Please read our extensive event info posts before sending us an ask - A link can be found at the end of this post. ~
WHUMPTOBER is a month-long, prompt-based creation challenge (think: Inktober, but whumpier). There are 31 official themes this year - one for each day of the month - which can be used, skipped, or combined in any way you’d like. They are meant to serve as inspiration without being taken literally (e.g. you don’t have to include the exact wording of prompts into your work). Feel free to run rampant on interpretation. For example, if the prompt is “bee”, you can create something about bees, about yellow and black striped baseball bats or bees on bandaids. It’s up to you.
Additionally, there are 3 prompts for each theme.  These are optional suggestions and can be used in conjunction with the theme, or as options/alternatives.  We want to give everyone as much creative freedom as possible, as well as increase event accessibility for folks with triggers and squicks.
Creators can PRODUCE work in any media they choose, including but not limited to: writing, visual artwork, photo/video/audio edits, paper crafts and elaborate recommendation lists (not just a list of links). Creators can PARTICIPATE as much or as little as they want (i.e. you don’t have to do ALL the prompts if you don’t want to) and prompts can be used in any order. They are also free to use even after the event ends.
When uploading Whumptober content to your blog, be sure to tag the with:
#whumptober2022 …..(the event tag)
#no.1, #no.2, #no.3, …..(theme number)
#bruises, #stabbing,  …..(the theme or specific prompt you chose)
#fandom or #OC, … (ironman, originalcontent, oc …)
#medium …..(gifs, fic, podcast, art, etc.)
#teeth, #etc …..(trigger warnings & any additional tags. Keep in mind not to add “tw” in front but only use the word/trigger itself, because tumblr sucks)
#nsfwhump …..(only for nsfw content)
#your own tags go here
PLEASE BE DILIGENT WITH YOUR TAGGING. Only properly tagged posts are considered for archiving on the official @whumptober-archive blog. They must be tagged in the order above. An elaborate post about our tagging system can be found [here]
Unfortunately, due to the sheer number of participants in recent years, we cannot guarantee your work will be archived. A random selection of properly tagged posts from all genres will be reblogged each day.
Whumpers who produce content for 31 total theme days are considered event completionists and will be tagged in a masterpost at the end of the month. A form will be published at the beginning of November asking you to tell us, if you completed. This is based on trust and we will not check this.
Questions not addressed in one of our many event info posts can be directed to this blog. We will not answer any questions that have been answered in the FAQs or rules already.
Frequently Asked Questions
Q. Is [specific anything] allowed?
When in doubt: JUST DO IT!
Q. Do I have to do all 31 days?
Participate as much or little as you like! Just be sure to tag your posts properly (ex. #no.14, #underpressure). If you post works for 31 total theme days you will become a completionist. But apart from that, there are no repercussions if you don’t fill prompts for each day.
Q. Can I post early/late?
Yes, you can post whenever you want. We will only reblog posts during October, but you can use our prompts all year round. The day you post will only affect your probability of being reblogged.
Q. Will you reblog my post?
Due to the sheer number of content posted during Whumptober we can’t promise to reblog every single post. We will make a random selection trying to capture a wide variety of content. The following will increase your chances at being reblogged:
tag your post properly
post within 2-3 days of the theme you want to fill: if you fill the prompt for Day 1 your chances of being reblogged during October 1st to 3rd are highest and will go towards zero afterwards.
Q. What if I don’t understand a theme?
Send us an ask! We’re happy to help with wild, unhelpful clarifications or brainstorming. That being said, the themes are entirely up for interpretation :) Don’t take them too literally. For example: You can be choking on a cherry, someone else can choke you or you could be choked up on emotions, etc.
Q. What kind of content can I make? Can it be NSFW?
This is a MIXED MEDIA event! You can write fic, post meta, doodle or paint, create a gifset or photo edit, link a song, or get crafty with video - anything goes. As for NSFW, make what you like, we just hope that you’ll tag your work accordingly so that others participating in the event can stay safe :)
Q. Can I combine Whumptober with other creation challenges?
Absolutely! That’s like shooting two whumpees with one bullet :)
Q. Can I upload/repost my Whumptober content to other social media platforms?
Of course! You can post your own content wherever you like (or you can opt to not publish it at all). Additionally we’ve created an AO3 Collection to archive any fics posted there. It can be accessed here. The tumblr blog @whumptober-archive is the official archive, so please respect the boundaries of any closeted whumpers in your social circle :)
Q. Can I use prompts to write a new chapter for an existing fic?
Yes.
Q. An existing fic I am currently writing contains many of the Whumptober prompts, can I use it?
If you are actively writing this fic at the moment with the Whumptober prompts in mind, yes. If it just conveniently checks the boxes, then please don’t. You can, however, add new chapters using one or more of the prompts.
Q. What kind of characters can I write for?
Fandom characters, OC characters, human, furry, alien, cyborg, whoever you like to whump.
Q. Can I use a prompt multiple times?
Yes,  but it only counts once
Q. If I’m not comfortable with one day’s prompts can I use a prompt of a different day as a substitute and still be a completionist?
No, you can’t exchange prompts for different days. However, if all four prompts of a specific day make you uncomfortable, we have created an alternate prompts list that you can draw from. You can exchange any prompt with these, but please make sure not to use them twice.
Q. Where can I post my work?
Post where and how you want. You don’t have to (cross)post it to Tumblr or at all. Just keep in mind if it’s not on Tumblr we will not be able to add it to the blog archive.
Q. Can I start posting early?
You can, but this is an October event and wouldn’t it be more fun with everyone doing it at the same time? That being said, you can post early, but we won’t be reblogging any work predating October 1st.
Q. Do I have to finish a fic I started/can I post WIP’s?
Yes you can post WIPs. And you’re not obligated to finish it in October for it to count towards being a completionist.  
Q. Is co-writing allowed?
Yes, absolutely, and it would count towards being a completionist for both/all of you :)
Q. Do I have to create 31 standalone pieces to be considered a completionist or can I write one continuous story?
One continuous story is fine.  The challenge is to write something for 31 prompts. If that’s spread over 31 fics or just one, you are still considered a completionist. (The same goes for every other media you choose.)
Q. Is there a min/max limit on word count?
There is no limit.
Q. Can I combine prompts? Is there a limit on how many?
No limit and combine as many as you’d like.
Q. Is a hc/angst focus ok?
Of course!
Q. What’s considered nsfw?
See this post
Q. What is whump?
See this post
Q. My interpretation of the prompt isn’t whumpy at all, does that count?
No, sorry, but keep in mind that whump [see definition] is something very nuanced and different for everyone and emotional whump/angst is just as much part of it, as is physical whump and torture. So before you dismiss your idea, think about this.
Q. Can I start working on the prompts before October?
Absolutely! That’s why we posted the prompts a month in advance. We recognise how difficult it can be creating for 31 days in “real time” so feel free to start writing early!
Q. How do I tag triggers?
Just tag the word, ex. emeto
Q. Do I have to use your tags?
If you want your work archived on the blog, then yes. If not, feel free to use whatever tags you want.  
Q. Does combining prompts count towards completion?
Yes
Q. Can we @ you?
Yes but we mostly rely on the #whumptober2022 tag
Q. Is there anything we are absolutely not allowed to write?
There are no rules, but please make sure to properly tag your trigger warnings. And keep in mind Tumblr’s policies if you are posting it here (or the policies for whatever site you use).
Q. Where can I go for brainstorming help?
Here on Discord or come into our ask box :)
Q. My characters are minors, is that ok?
Yes, but as with everything else, tags are your best friend.
Q. Can I cross post on other blogs?
Yes, multiple platforms and blogs are perfectly acceptable. You can also post different works to different accounts under different names, without posting them everywhere at once.
Note: This is a creation challenge, please don’t repost your old work under our tags (unless it’s been changed or edited for the event).
Thanks for reading, and happy whumping!
9K notes · View notes
ventismacchiato · 9 months
Text
41 behind the lens — truth or drink !
scaramouche x g!n reader
you and scara get asked to go on the youtube talk show ‘truth or drink’, where you ask eachother a series of questions. if one of you decides not to answer you must take a shot instead.
Tumblr media
welcome to truth or drink! celebrity couples will ask each other a set of random questions. they can either answer the question or take a shot!
Scara immediately starts pouring himself a shot.
You: we haven’t even started yet!
how long have you both been together?
Scara: about five years
You: five long years
Scara: go fuck yourself?
how did you both get together? did you two secretly pretend to hate each other online? everyone is dying to know!
You start reaching for the bottle but Scara yanks it away from you.
Scara: go on, answer it baby
You: do i have to?
Scara: if you don’t then i will
You: fine. basically i fell for scara before i knew he was a popular streamer, he was just a classmate from my photography class. the day after our first date is when i found out he was the balladeer.
Scara: and you continued to date me and not tell me you were my mortal enemy!
You: he’s still petty about this as you can see
when did he find out you were stardust?
You: a month later i think? after we went to paris for twitch con?
Scara: i need a drink just listening to this
worst thing you both experienced after doing your face reveal years ago?
Scara: no more alone time, i couldn’t even go for a walk without people recognizing me
You: also college was so weird after, i remember professors would play my videos after and ask if that was me. like obviously it is?
Scara: also so many photos, couldn’t even go to a public bathroom without people trying to photograph my dick
You: thankfully it’s died down since then
how often do you guys have sex?
Scara: it used to be every other day
You: but then we got real people jobs like acting and directing and now it’s less
Scara: a shame
most public place you’ve have sex?
You and Scara both share a look.
You: okay, i’ll divulge one place that’s not too bad. his trailer on his most recent project
Scara silently takes a shot.
have you ever considered breaking up?
This time it’s your turn to take the bottle away from Scara.
Scara: i wasn’t serious about it, but i have thought about it
You: tell them how many times
Scara: not my fault i have commitment issues!
have you ever cheated on one another?
Scara: they cheated on me with my alter ego
You: I TOLD YOU EVENTUALLY DIDN’T I?
what’s something about eachother the media wouldn’t believe?
You: he is so clingy, but it’s so cute
Scara: i am not
You: you’re literally playing with my foot right now
Scara: fuck off, and nobody would believe how kinky you are
You: i think you mean how kinky you are
Scara: and you’re into it so what does that say about you?
You: pour me a shot
how many sexual partners have you had?
Scara stares off to the side to count in his head.
Scara: 20?
You: the way you don’t even know
Scara: before you i just had a lot of one night stands, i was a whore
You: you still are
Scara: you’re into it
You: …unlike him i will be taking a shot for this one
have you talked about marriage?
You: tell them what you told me
Scara: marriage is a social construct, why do i have to host a big event and get down on one knee to prove i want to be with someone for the rest of my life? yn already knows i love them and now i have to get a ring and do paperwork too? society sucks
You: he’s insane, but we have talked about it
Scara: they will be proposing though
You: he’s such a princess
if you were allowed one pass, who would you sleep with?
You: wait, out of people we know?
Scara: Hm…say it on three
You: okay…1…2…3
You and Scara: Kazuha
Scara: honestly, i think he and Heizou would be down
something romantic your partner does?
You: honestly he has a lot…a recent one i found out about was when Scara buys me flowers he always keeps one for himself, so when it dies he knows when to get me a new bouquet
Scara: okay
You: awe look, he’s all shy now
how many kids do you both want if any?
Scara: i like kids but i want zero of my own
You: he compared it to a dog
Scara: that makes me sound bad! i said it’s like a dog because other people’s dogs are cute but if i had my own i would accidentally kill it
You: my blood line ends with me
if your partner was in a coma, how long would you wait for them?
Scara: a good year, maybe two if i feel like it
You: THAT’S IT?
Scara: …yeah?
You: offended you won’t wait an eternity for me and never fall in love again
Scara: my water bill will finally be normal again without you
You: such a romantic you are
how often do you two get into arguments? and what about?
You: not as much as we used to, we’re better at finding solutions and communicating
Scara: it’s usually about how busy we are due to work
You: yeah sometimes we go weeks without seeing eachother and it makes him cranky
Scara: one time they ran towards me at an airport
You: it was romantic!
Scara: i had to drop my coffee to catch you
something about marriage that scares you?
Scara pours himself a shot.
You: hey, tell me!
Scara: no thanks
You: Please?
Scara: …fine. just scared you’ll get bored eventually or realize i’m not the one
You: i’ll ever get bored of you!
Scara: we’ll see
has anyone flirted with you during a project? any fellow actors or directors?
You: sometimes people hit on him right in front of me
Scara: you’re no better, people hit on you more. literally just last week—[censored]
You: can you guys bleep that so nobody loses their job!
first impression of each other?
You: i thought he was the cutest boy in class
Scara: you’re fun to listen to
You: i talked a lot during our college days didn’t i?
Scara: you still do
You: wow…
Scara: didnt say i disliked it, idiot
one thing you would change about the other?
Scara: nothing
You: okay i feel bad about my answer
Scara: fuck you?
You: i was going to say i wish you were less of a workaholic!
Scara: i can try
how do your parents feel about your relationship?
Scara: thanks for watching, make sure to like and subscribe and comment down below-
You: sore topic as you can see
last one before we let you two go, something you love about eachother?
You: he’s going to take a shot
Scara slowly puts the bottle back down.
You: told ya
Scara: theres so many fucking people watching me right now
You: fine, i’ll go first. i like how he shows his love for me in different ways like a lot of people think hes really cold but once he gets comfortable he can be the loudest and sweetest person in the room
Scara: thanks i guess
You: look how red he is
Scara: do you want to die?
You: okay, my turn!
Scara: i like…how you make me feel safe
You: you’re so cute
Scara: die
You: i love you too
Tumblr media
behind the lens !
masterlist — prev | next
author’s notes — i thought this wud be silly so hope u enjoyed 🙏 almost free 😭😭
synopsis — you, better known as STARDUST, and BALLADEER have always been in competition for the top streamer spot on twitch, which is especially impressive since the two of you have never shown your faces. you’ve never been on good terms, constantly one-upping each other in matches and getting into petty arguments on twitter, causing your fans to also dislike each other. that’s until BALLADEER does a face reveal that breaks the internet with his good looks…which makes you realize it’s the same guy you went on a date with last night. the type of date that made you crave to see him again. the only problem was he didn’t know you were STARDUST and he was way different behind the lens than he portrayed himself online to you. should you keep your identity a secret to salvage the relationship or just let him go?
taglist is closed — @captainzep @elysiumarchieve @plinkuro @sakkakuu-squared @eliqusgenma @vuvulia @kunikuzushiit @ins4nebish @stxrgxzxr @lilacponds @uma-umie @mitsukifilms @caesars-bubbles @wheneverthesunrise @its-like-twilight @kazuhalvrr @erosdevil @thenightsflower @p1utto @noodleshark420 @lxry-chxn @court-jester-stuff @lauragalliart @veyu002 @kaeyas-eyepatch-69 @leathernourishingshoepolish @courtneydefender @drunkwithfever @exhaustedcommunist @vincanzu @ainlaw @ovaliz @kitsuvil @whatamidoing89 @celestair @kunihaver @kazioli @xiaosoneandonly @cridtiins @cherrybeomgyu @asukahiriko @moon-320 @orionicchaos @cartierfiles [1/3]
2K notes · View notes
scented-morker · 9 months
Text
Enha when their actress partner films with a hot actor
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
jealous boyfriend enha! established relationship, actress reader, 1164 words, requested!!
Tumblr media
Heeseung
He pretends he's not phased at all
He knows you love him obviously, you spend like four hours a week crying and telling him how pretty he is and how much he means to you
But that was before he knew it was THE Song Kang
"Baby, he's literally the prettiest person ever!"
"You think he's prettier than me?" You pout
"Don't ask questions you don't want to know the answer to"
Homeboy is SWEATING watching you guys film
Literally saying a hallelujah when there's no romance between your characters
But when you come back and tell him he was right that it was the prettiest person ever he gets mad about it
LIKE YOU SAID IT FIRST ???!
But he wants to be the only boy you think is pretty 😔
Won't let you escape his grasp for the next week
Jay
Listen he likes to act all confident, but deep down he is a little bit insecure about his looks
So when you tell him you're filming with one of the actors who made "worlds most beautiful" list
😐 he is not impressed
On the outside he's all "oh that's cool"
But on the inside he's screaming crying throwing up
Wears the outfits he knows make you weak the whole week leading up to it
I'm talking turtle necks, rolled sleeves, rings, all of it 😵‍💫
His masterplan is working, and you get so affectionate you don't even want to leave him to film
He lowkey feels so silly about being jealous when on a film break you bring your costar over and introduce him to "the love of my life Jay"
Jake
Literally SO POUTY
"Noooo, baby do you haveee to??"
Acts like it's the worst thing to ever happen
"What if you just quit your job as an actress?? I can take care of you!! I'll pay for everything!! You'll never have to work again!"
"Jake, I like my job"
"But I thought you LOVED me!"
Insists on going with you to set (also leaves a hickey on you that your makeup artist is very mad about 😭)
You have to ignore him the whole time you're filming because you know he's making those injured puppy dog eyes and you just can't handle it
He literally is hanging out with the actor during one of his breaks tho so ???
He's all "yeah bro you're awesome" so you think it's all good now
But then you go over to them and he gives you the most mind melting, earth shattering, blush inducing kiss ever right in front of your coworker
You will never recover
Sunghoon
Tells you he's more attractive than the other guy 🤪
You tell him because you want to be open and warn him
But he's all "okay and? He's not better than me, why should I be worried?"
You're like wow my boyfriend is so mature and cool
But you realize very quickly that he is, indeed, worried
"Hey y/n, be honest. Do you prefer blondes or brunettes?"
"Hey y/n, do you think idols or actors would make better husbands?"
"Hey y/n, do you think onscreen chemistry ever transfers off screen?"
"I prefer whatever color is currently on your head, you over anyone of any profession, and I wouldn't know because I don't need to worry about that seeing as how I'm in a very happy relationship."
He grumbles at your answers, mad you caught on
He's not one for pda but he does bring you a bouquet and your favorite drink to the film sight <3
Sunoo
The guy was one of his favorite actors!!
He was so so excited for you to work with him, until he found out he was your love interest 😐
"YOURE GONNA KISS ANOTHER MAN?!?"
"Sun, he's married." 😒
"YEAH UNTIL HE FALLS IN LOVE WITH YOU AND GETS A DIVORCE!"
He boycotts the actors other shows 😭 whenever you guys hang out and watch dramas together he'll turn it off if the guy comes on screen
Eventually gives up on drama nights and makes you watch a bunch of enhypen performance videos instead
"Wahhh he's so handsome! Even more handsome then that actor, don't you think?"
"Yes Sun, you're way more handsome."
He's fishing for compliments but you don't care, willing to give him all the reassurances you have
You think he's gotten over it by the time filming comes up
But lo and behold... he's sent you an entire coffee truck with pictures of the two of you and messages about your relationship 😭
Jungwon
He wants SO BADLY to be okay with it 🥹
He was so supportive, celebrating with you when you first got the role and now coming to every filming that you have
Except he's noticed the slowly developing love story between you and the hottest guy on the show
So when you get the script for episode ten and read it to him he knows it's coming
"Oh, so you're like... gonna kiss someone else?"
You literally want to burst into tears, he's so precious and he looks like a little sad cat and just- 😭😭😭
"Yeah, but we've both been very open that we have partners! His girlfriend is on set all the time too! And you can totally be there when we film it!"
He shudders, "I'm not sure I want to"
But he goes anyway, and you introduce him to your costars partner
So now they're standing together, making small talk and looking away every time they say action
"I'm gonna need a drink," she mumbled after her boyfriend has to get his makeup fixed because of your lipstick on him
"Yeah, me too"
Riki
Listen, he is your number one fan
He’s seen every episode and won’t let you read him the script because he wants to find out with everyone else
He checks Twitter about it all the time too
So when soompi reports that there’s a new, very attractive guy on set— he sees it immediately
“Hey ynie~ can I come to filming with you?”
You’re so suprised, because he never wants to come with you
“Really? You’re not freaking out about it being spoiled for you?”
“I just want to be with you 🤷🏻‍♀️” he says it so nonchalantly like you’re not literally turning into mush because of it
“Okay!”
So fast forward, your hair and makeup is done, costume on, and you’re finally getting ready to film
You’re on set while the scene before you is shooting, and your boyfriend lets out a gasp
“Who is that shirtless man over there?”
You look over and shrug, explaining the new character
“Why is he shirtless??” Man is so fixated on this
“He’s always like that.”
“WHAT?”
There’s been a shirtless actor walking around you all days of the week and you hadn’t said anything
Steps up the pda immediately, holding your hand during off times and loudly cheering for you during shooting
By the end EVERYONE knew you were dating
3K notes · View notes
jaylaxies · 6 months
Text
KINKTOBER DAY 22 — HAND KINK
Tumblr media
PAIRING: jeno x fem!reader
GENRE/CW: smut, roommate au, fingering, praising, usage of nicknames.
WC: 0.9k words
WARNING: 18+ content, minors dni
A/N: hihi, angels! here i have soft dom!jeno as requested by my lovee @lunalovesstories! i hope you like it :3 all likes, comments, reblogs and feedbacks are highly appreciated! iloveyou all <33
✎ kinktober masterlist
Tumblr media
“You’re staring, babe.”
His deep, soothing voice was enough to snap you out of your daydream, suddenly hyper aware of your surroundings, and well, your eyes which were fixated on his fingers. 
Lee Jeno was your roommate, and it was normal for you guys to sit down and have a chat, or give each other company occasionally, yet you had never been invited to sit down next to him to do what, watch him play video games? 
The offer was sweet, considering you were bored out of your mind and had nothing better to do at the given moment, yet your whole perspective regarding the situation changed when you realized that you’ll be watching Jeno work his fingers on the keyboard to kill off the enemies. 
Now, the idea of staring at someone’s hands must sound creepy per se, however you weren’t at fault or to be blamed for staring when Jeno had such long and slender fingers. You were rendered speechless when you first encountered the said man in a sleeveless tank top, his muscles prominent, which was also the day when you realized just how buff he is. That same day, he helped you carry the groceries inside the apartment—the veins on his arms more prominent than ever. 
The realization of the fact that he had pretty hands only encouraged your mind to get indulged in the most lewd thoughts of him having his fingers buried deep in your cunt. It had you wondering just how heavenly it would feel if he’d let you suck on his fingers, if he’d pinch your nipples for being naughty and staring, if he’d wrap his fingers around your neck in a gentle squeeze. 
Jeno can’t lie, he’s noticed your stare on his hands quite a few times now, yet he hadn’t ever bothered to point it out before, until today that is, mostly because he found it cute how you had completely zoned out while your eyes were still on the keyboard. 
You panicked, wondering if he thought that you were crazy for staring, yet you only found him smiling at you with a gentle gaze, his fingers coming to caress your cheek, your heartbeat rising up at the feeling of his soft thumb pads on your skin. 
“You like them, hm?” He asked, voice deep and soft. 
You found yourself gulping and saying no mindlessly to prevent any more embarrassment, to which he chuckled, “is that so?” 
“Jeno,” you didn’t mean it to come out as a whine but it did, especially when his thumb brushed your lip, your mouth parting open on its own accord, mind fuzzy already. 
He only pulled you closer effortlessly, making you sit on his lap with a gasp, holding your waist and continuing his actions. You couldn’t help it, not when his fingers were resting on your lips, so you simply opened your mouth further, your tongue gliding along his skin before you started sucking on them. 
He looked at you, mesmerized. Firstly because he didn’t expect his roommate to be interested in him. Secondly, because you looked so beautiful just sucking on his fingers, your lips glistening with the saliva. 
“So fucking pretty,” he muttered under his breath, his other hand parting your legs, massaging your inner thighs, which was convenient for him as you had worn a skirt. 
The cool metal of his rings juxtaposed the warmth of your skin, and you fully gave up trying to conceal your moans when he started rubbing your pussy over the panties, setting your mouth free to hear your pretty noises as you hid your face in his neck. 
“Still don’t like it, baby?” He whispered, cupping your cheek with his free hand to make you look up at him. 
“I do,” you breathed out, “I really do,” you confirmed, making him pull you in a sweet kiss, your knees weak with how effortlessly he got rid of your panties before stuffing you full of his fingers, your back arching with the sudden stretch. 
“That’s it, baby. You’re taking it so well,” he praised, pressing butterfly kisses all over your neck, as you held on to his arm for support, squirming and shaking with how good he made you feel, thrusting his fingers and abruptly picking up the pace when you started rolling your hips to meet his two digits, clenching uncontrollably while doing so. 
“Shh, baby. Calm down,” he whispered, pecking the side of your lip when you felt yourself breathing hard, “take a deep breath, yeah?” He kissed you all over your face. 
It felt too good, the unadulterated pleasure which had your nipples hardened, a tear escaping your eyes, which he kissed away, wrapping his arms around you to squeeze and fondle your tits, veins visible on his hands as he did so. 
“Go ahead, princess. Make a mess on my fingers,” he holds you gently, helping you reach your climax, patting your folds softly, pushing the wet fingers in your mouth to clean him up, “that’s my good girl,” he whispered, hugging you close to him which made you smile. 
You couldn’t believe that your roommate had you falling apart on his fingers, and praising you through it all.
All you knew was you didn’t want it to stop, and neither did Jeno because soon, he was picking you up and helping you get on the bed, pulling his T-shirt up and removing it before he got on top of you with a smirk, “are you ready, princess?”
It was going to be a long night. 
Tumblr media
THANK YOU FOR READING!
permanent taglist: @jaeminvore @macaroonff @ajayke-reads @jaysbiceps @lunalovesstories @jayzdaze @deobitifull @celeste-hoon @mari-oclock @kpoprhia @ikeuizm @woniebae
@lalalalawon @blessedcursd @skzenhalove @heesuncore @seuomo @kyurizeu @haechan-nahceah @tobiosbbyghorl @jezzebear @jaehoonii @itsgivingitalian @bunhoons @hyacandoit @luvswonyoung @ma-riiii
kinktober taglist: @glitterssim @kaykay11sworld @sfsrm-blog @certifiedmoa @luvkpopp @lanawyi @heerinnie @ablackbtsstan @mesopret @electrobutterfly @cupidsmoons @erehkinnie30 @mulit05ho3st4n
bold ones couldn’t be tagged!
taglist open! send an ask or comment to be added!
Tumblr media
© jaylaxies | tumblr
1K notes · View notes
holllandtrash · 9 months
Text
haunted | daniel ricciardo
Tumblr media
pairing: daniel ricciardo x driver!reader (part 2 to fragile line)
Can't breathe whenever you're gone Can't turn back now, I'm haunted
you're racing. daniel isn't, but he's not gone either, is he? word count: 7.6k (im so sorry) warnings/tags: angst really, more incorrect f2 stats but whatever, time jumps again, platonic love all around, not as big of a rollercoaster as part 1 but just wait till part 3 lol
Tumblr media
“Do you know?”
“Do I know what?” You asked, wondering why that was the first thing your teammate said when you opened the door to your flat. 
Lando didn’t even bother with a ‘hey, how was your day, what’s up’, he was just straight to the point, only you had no idea what the point was. 
He was still on a high after coming in second place the other day, so you let the impoliteness slide. Usually Lando didn’t look like a mix between a sweaty mess and a confused child, but you assumed he was like this because whatever was on his mind was important.
“You haven’t- did you-” Lando stammered over his words. “When’s the last time you checked your phone?”
You felt around in your pockets and glanced over your shoulder with a bit of a shrug. If you were being honest, you hadn’t looked at your phone in a few hours. Your morning was spent training and running errands now that you had some time and were home for a little while before the next race. You were still carrying a lot of energy after your successful finish in Silverstone that sitting still and scrolling through your phone was the last thing you wanted to be doing right now.
“Can you just find your phone, please?” Lando asked, because he didn’t want to be the person to break the news. He came over to talk to you, to walk you through it, to be someone to vent to if you needed it, but the last thing he wanted was to be the one to say it. 
It took a minute, but you found it in your bedroom, the screen lighting up and vibrating with each notification. As you walked back towards Lando, you scrolled through them all, trying to see which was the most important. 
Eventually, you landed on one from the official F1 app.
Daniel Ricciardo Replaces Nyck de Vries
Daniel Ricciardo was returning to the grid.
Daniel was coming back. 
But did he ever really leave in the first place?
You hadn’t spoken to him since that day in Monaco, almost a year ago now. The day your relationship fell apart, crumbling to pieces around you. 
You thought maybe, maybe, he’d call you before the next race or at least try to find you somewhere in the paddock to have a civil conversation but that didn’t happen. 
Of course, neither of you had time for a conversation anyway.
Daniel released his video 24 hours before media day in Belgium, announcing he would be leaving the team. It broke your heart watching it in your hotel room, knowing he was only a few floors up and probably struggled to record it. You could picture him retaking it a few times, just to get the words right, his tone right. He didn’t want to paint McLaren as being at fault for this decision, even if that was the case. 
If you weren’t the driver who was set to replace him, you would have been there in that room giving him encouraging nods and telling him to just speak to the fans. You would have been there when his head fell back against the wall in defeat, eyes closed as the weight of his unknown future crashed down on him. You would have crawled onto his lap and held him, telling him that another team was going to be desperate for him. 
Instead you were in your own room, watching the video like the millions of other followers he had. The only difference was, none of those followers asked themselves if they were to blame. 
It was just you, wiping the corner of your eyes and asking yourself if this was your fault. 
Surely when your news dropped, people would start pointing fingers, people would talk. 
Daniel Ricciardo trained her, they would say. He helped her get to this point and now she’s taking his seat. 
They’d throw assumptions into the wind about how this was probably your plan all along. 
It wasn’t, of course. Your plan was to get a seat in Formula 1 and see Daniel as friendly competition when you stepped onto the grid. You wanted to keep the support system alive when you moved up, knowing you had someone watching your back when you climbed out of the car. You wanted to be able to go home with him at the end of the night on Sunday and watch the race back with him, playfully critiquing each other's moves and ideally celebrating your victories, together.
You never wanted to leave him without a seat. 
But part of you must have known he wasn’t driving next year, right? You never brought up the contract, he never talked about leaving, nor did he talk about potentially moving to another team, which seemed like something you’d talk to your partner about. 
Daniel said nothing. You said nothing. And in the back of your head you knew he wasn’t signed to another team, you just didn’t want to accept it. 
You didn’t want to admit that part of that was your fault. 
Zak Brown put you in the worst position possible. He was giving you the chance to make your dream a reality, but in doing so, you were losing the one person who shared that dream with you. 
It shouldn’t have been hard to put on a smile during that post-race interview in Spa. You finished second, your hot streak had continued despite the turmoil your heart was going through. So not only was the adrenaline pumping through your veins from the podium, but McLaren had decided that morning was the perfect time to announce you were replacing Daniel. 
They didn’t word it like that, though. They just stated that you were to race for McLaren for 2023. No mention of Daniel, even if that was all anyone had questions about. 
“Second place in Spa, how are you feeling?” The reporter asked as you struggled to get comfortable in the white leather chair, your trophy at your feet. 
You weren’t surprised he, Richard from the official FIA reporting team, jumped directly to you, bypassing any questions for Liam Lawson who finished third. No one had yet to get a comment on your official move to F1, not having any time this morning since the news was announced. 
“It's exciting, it’s good to be back as well,” you nodded, turning to Felipe on your right who nodded as well. “A break is always needed, but there’s really no better feeling than getting back behind the wheel.”
“You’ve never podiumed here before,” Richard pointed out, “There’s quite a difference in performance from last year to this year, we’ve all noticed.” 
“Is there a question in there somewhere?” You laughed, not caring at all if it sounded forced, and you knew it did because Liam raised his hand to mouth to hide his chuckle and tried to play it off like he was just scratching his jaw. 
“Well it’s just no wonder that McLaren has snatched you up for the 2023 season, with how much you’ve shown this year what you’re capable of. Care to comment on that?” 
There it was. The first official request to talk about McLaren. 
“I mean, we’ve all seen the news at this point,” another laugh but this time it was more out of discomfort. 
You looked at Felipe, he nodded again but it was short and encouraging, silently telling you it was okay to take the spotlight even though it was him who had won this race. 
You cleared your throat, thinking about what the PR team from McLaren told you. You’re focused on Prema. McLaren knows this. McLaren is supporting you while you finish your F2 season and by all means, shut down any topic regarding Daniel Ricciardo. 
“Really, I’m just focused on finishing the season off strong with Prema,” you told Richard, feeling your smile start to slip because how could you be excited over that or a trophy when you knew what he was thinking and what the whole world was thinking. 
You prayed he wouldn’t bring it up, but the media world was hell. 
“And Daniel’s departure-
Liam promptly lifted the mic to lips, cutting off Richard before he could finish that thought. “We’ll all miss her, I think that’s safe to say. But maybe it’ll be a bit easier for the rest of us to podium when she’s gone.”
Quiet laughter spread through the audience and you just turned to Liam and mouthed a quick ‘thank you’. He didn’t say anything back, just dropped his head to your shoulder for a second and smiled, playing up the whole we’ll miss her statement. It wasn’t an act, though. Most of the guys you raced with had stopped you at some point this morning sharing their congrats and giving you a hug, telling you that you deserved that spot in F1. 
Even Felipe said it and meant it, and he was on the fast track to win this year, also eyeing a spot in F1. You had a good support system in this series. 
He dropped his head to your other shoulder and your lips fell into a playful pout, raising your hands to the sides of both driver’s faces. It made a cute photo. The F1 social media team really played into the love you had from your competitors. 
You had a lot of support in the paddock, surprisingly, from other drivers. 
Mick found you before his own race started. He was your first teammate during your rookie season in F2, it only made sense he was the first current driver to congratulate you.  
“You deserve it,” Mick told you, arms tightly wrapped around your body as he gave you a comforting embrace that almost compared to the one you were craving from Daniel, but still something was missing. 
Mick’s contract was up at the end of 2022, and no one knew where he was going but he assured you that no matter what, he’d be on your side. 
You sort of interacted with Lando on Sunday after your feature race. When you passed him in the paddock, he held his hand out for a fist bump and gave you a wide smile. The cameras caught it, they caught everything apparently, and it was the first photo you saw on social media when you got to the airport late Sunday evening. 
First of many celebratory fist bumps, McLaren’s caption said. It was a nice photo, truly. 
Too bad the comments were anything but. 
Not McLaren hyping up the fact that Danny’s girlfriend is replacing himIsn’t she only fourth in the driver standings in F2 lol We don’t want her we want the honey badgerEven worse when you think about the fact that they are literally in a relationship and she’s taking his seatNo class from any of them
No one seemed to know that you and Daniel were done, but how would they know? Your relationship was private, your break up would be too. 
Your break up. 
And then it hit you. Right there in the airport. After the adrenaline of a podium had worn off. After the excitement of signing with a new team had passed. After you were finally left alone after being surrounded by your team and drivers and press all day, you broke down. 
It was embarrassing. The only saving grace was the fact that you were sat in the corner of the premium lounge, facing the windows, so at least no one could see you cry. You weren’t quiet though, you knew your faint sobs could be heard from anyone within a 3 metre radius.
And you knew how immature this was, crying in an airport. But when you felt things you felt them with every fibre in your being. You were overjoyed beyond words, shaking when you got first podium in F2, and then feeling that multiplied by fifty when you won in Monaco. 
You were madly in love with Daniel, despite only dating for a year. It wasn’t young love, puppy love, a whirlwind romance, or any of those sappy headlines. You were head over heels, ready to spend your life with the man who lifted you up above the rest of the world. Who not only put you on a pedestal, but made sure other people did too. He was always in your corner, even before you started dating. He loved you long before you even realised you could also love him. 
As an athlete, as a future world championship contender, as a friend, Daniel loved you. 
The day you knew you loved him, you knew you were screwed, you both talked about the risks. 
Fragile line, you called it, walking a tightrope, he joked. There was such a huge margin of error, so many things that could go wrong by falling in love with, not only a driver but the driver who mentored you. 
The media would turn against you. Sponsors would shake their heads. Your future could have been jeopardised. You’d be labelled as a poor role model for girls in motorsport. 
You walked a dangerous and delicate line with Daniel, but you didn’t think it would snap beneath your feet. You never thought you’d be the one to break it. 
So yes, you were full on sobbing in the airport as you waited to board your flight to Amsterdam. 
“Pretty sure podium winners aren’t usually this distraught.”
You heard the British accent and immediately sat up, wiping your eyes and sniffling to at least try and make it seem like you weren’t crying. You turned your head and watched as Lando sat down next to you on the dark blue chair, resting a leg over his knee. 
You didn’t say anything, you just stared at him, worrying that if you did try to talk, all that would come out would be more cries. 
Lando reached into the front pocket of his backpack and pulled out a travel size pack of tissues, tossing them to you without so much as a word. He waited a few minutes as you composed yourself, using some of the tissues and pocketing the rest for later. 
“You okay?” Lando asked, sounding concerned for your well being because he had a point, podium winners aren’t usually this distraught. 
“Am I okay?” You repeated back followed with a playful scoff. “Do I look okay?” 
“You look awful.”
“I feel awful.”
Lando nodded, clearly unsure what to do in this situation. His current teammate, his friend, was leaving at the end of this year and his new teammate, a girl he had barely had 5 conversations with, was having a breakdown in the airport. 
Lando, whether he liked it or not, knew he would be caught in the middle of whatever this mess was for the next few months or so. 
He knew you and Daniel were an item. Daniel told himself shortly after Silverstone, and only because Lando had asked, simply curious.
“You and Y/N,” he started off, hesitantly, seeing the two of you interact much more flirtatiously then you had before. “You two are..” he didn’t know how to word it. 
Daniel just winked, “I’ll tell you when you’re older.”
That pretty much confirmed it. And then when you started showing up in the back of the McLaren garage during race weekends, Lando sort of accepted it, quickly getting used to seeing you around. 
You were always friendly with each other, but your attention was always on Daniel, too. Lando saw the way you were quick to rush to his side after a difficult race. How you were the first one Daniel looked for when he stepped out of the car, eyes searching the sea of orange for you. Lando heard the way Daniel talked about you, the way he praised you, telling everyone who would listen that you deserved a spot in Formula 1. That man had a note saved on his phone of your stats, race wins, qualifying times, records broken, all of it. 
Daniel loved you. Everyone who knew him saw it, and Lando was no exception. 
So one could imagine the uncertainty he felt as he approached you in the airport. Surely you and Daniel weren’t together anymore, right? Or were you somehow going to work through this? Could you work through it? Taking his seat?
Lando, like everyone else, was dying to know. 
“Has he said anything?” You asked him before Lando had a chance to get a word out. That question alone confirmed that you and Daniel weren’t on speaking terms at least.
“About you?” Lando asked and when you nodded, he saw the devastation hit your eyes as he shook his head. “Honestly he wasn’t very talkative today, left right after the post race stuff.”
“How is he?” You then asked. “Has he- is there any word on him finding a seat next year?” You pulled your knees up to your chest, staring hopefully at the British driver. 
It pained Lando to shake his head again, “Not yet, but it’s still pretty early. I’m sure he’ll find a seat.”
You nodded, praying that Lando was right. When you dropped your chin to your knees, averting your eyes when you felt the tears well up again, Lando’s chest grew tight. He felt bad for you. This was a hard position for you to be in. 
“It’s not your fault, you know,” Lando assured you. “Danny’s one of the best there is, but the results just aren’t there. Zak didn’t see any point in continuing if it’ll just end up being more of the same.”
Lando tried to be encouraging, really, and you were thankful for that, but he got the hint after a while that you just didn’t want to talk about it. Before leaving you alone, he gave you his number and told you that if you needed anything, to just reach out. 
You were always friendly with Lando, but that was the start to your friendship.
It was Lando who shared your picture when you claimed first place in Zandvoort, celebrating your success with a cheeky caption stating how he better see you bring the hot streak to McLaren next year. He was the one who interrupted your post-race interview in Monza, spotting you in the paddock being interviewed by Will Buxton. Lando, despite needing to follow his own pre-race schedule, came and draped an arm over your shoulder and playfully interrupted whatever Will was trying to say.
“Look at that,” Will laughed when you struggled to shake Lando’s arm off of you, “Future teammates. Lando, how excited are you to be working with this incredible talent next year?”
“Oh extremely excited,” Lando answered, leaning into the mic gripped between your fingers. “She won’t be able to keep up with me though.”
And that it was it. He ruffled his hand through your hair and took off again.
He checked in on you between races, whenever a new headline was trending, whenever someone from social media had the audacity to compare yours and Daniels stats and pin you against each other as if there wasn’t already enough you were struggling with.
Lando didn’t want you to come into the new season already feeling defeated. He was still friends with Daniel, he always would be, but he had a kind heart. He wanted you to know that he wasn’t on anyones ‘side’, but more importantly, he saw you as a driver, as his next teammate. He didn’t see you as Daniel’s ex who was now stealing his seat like half of the world did.
It was also his car that you drove during the practice sessions in Austin and Abu Dhabi. Lando happily stepped aside for you, giving you a supportive pat on the back and strategically blocking your line of sight towards Daniel as he got ready for his sessions as well.
You still hadn’t spoken. You hadn’t even looked at each other. You tried, honestly, to catch his eye but he refused to even glance your way. He was in and out of that car so quick, finding any excuse to leave the garage while you were there.
It hurt. You knew his mind was made up. He was upset, he was hurt, he wanted nothing to do with you and seeing you in his garage sent him spiralling.
All you saw was Daniel turning his back on you, but what you didn’t know was this situation was giving Daniel constant headaches. He couldn’t look at you, the girl he loved, and watch you climb into the McLaren knowing that you’d be doing that throughout the entire next season and he wouldn’t.
All he ever wanted was to see you in a Formula 1 car, but not like this. 
You stood in Lando’s side of the garage during the last race. You wore your McLaren jacket, you had the orange headphones on as stared up at the screen. Your back was towards Daniel’s car, so you missed the way he did actually look at you. It pained him to see how well you blended in with the team, his team. He almost told himself it looked like you belonged there, but he quickly put his helmet on and climbed into his car, gearing up for the race.
He finished 9th. Lando finished 6th. And with that, the season ended.
Daniel was done.
You watched him celebrate with those closest to him. You stood off to the side and thought about how if things were different, you’d be clinging to him, sweaty race suit and all, waiting to congratulate him in your own way back at the hotel. You would tell him you loved him, that he didn’t need McLaren. You’d joke and say that you two could form your own team, because that’s what you should have been till the end, a team. 
But that wasn’t the case anymore. McLaren was your team now.
It was only a matter of days until Daniel spoke to the media about his departure. 
“I can’t speak ill of her,” Daniel said, shifting uncomfortably on the couch. He knew that coming on this podcast that he’d be asked about you and your contract. He was advised against it but the second his working relationship ended with McLaren, he agreed to talk, to share his side.
“But she’s the one who took your seat,” Jaycee so politely pointed out. “As happy as I am to see a female in Formula 1, it’s bittersweet knowing a driver such as yourself is left without a spot.”
Daniel sighed into the mic in front of him, “McLaren handed her her dream on a papaya platter and she grabbed it. I think a lot of drivers would do the same in that scenario.”
“But it stings a little more, doesn’t it?” Greyson, her co-host asked. “Because you two were-
“Friends, yeah,” Daniel interrupted. “Yeah we were close.”
“You mentored her,” Greyson pushed for more of an admittance as to what their relationship was. “You were seen with her and the Prema team during a handful of weekends. She even said you were her mentor.”
Daniel naturally hesitated, “I saw her potential early on and I wanted to help her grow. I really did want to see her in Formula 1, despite what anyone says about the situation she’s an incredible driver.”
“Everyone who follows Formula 1 knows you have a strong connection,” Jaycee said, subtly trying to pry for more as well. “After her Silverstone crash in 2021 you were in her garage. And then you were seen in Monaco together a few weeks later. You two weren’t just friends in the paddock, you worked closely together outside of race weekends too-
“Did your girlfriend take your seat or not?” Greyson blurted out, earning a glare from Jaycee on his left, but he couldn’t hold it in anymore. He wanted to know, the whole world wanted to know what was going on between you and Daniel now that you were signed for McLaren. 
And you had to give props to Daniel, he played it off about as smoothly as he could. 
“McLaren sees more potential in her than me,” he said, still smiling because that’s who he was. A people pleaser, always grinning, always a breath of fresh air. “If they can give her what they promised me, then that’s good for all of them. Do I like how the situation went down? No, but that’s the reality of Formula 1. You’re not safe unless you’re winning and I wasn’t winning.”
“And your relationship-
“She doesn’t need a mentor anymore, does she?” Daniel asked, disregarding any ideas of the two of you dating. “She made it to Formula 1. That was what she wanted. I wish her well.” 
That was the closest thing to confirmation of your break up that anyone would get. 
And the interview ended shortly after that, doing wonders on Spotify and Apple Podcasts. You listened to it also, just waiting for Daniel to say something horrible but of course he didn’t. That wasn’t him. He was the good guy. He was the hero. He got you to Formula 1 and was holding his head up high, wishing you well and thanking McLaren for the last 2 years. 
You wished it ended there, the conversations surrounding you. It should have ended there. 
But fast forward to the awards dinner at the end of the year, just shortly after the last race of the season. 
You sat with your mum at a round table with Felipe and his partner and few other people involved in Formula 2. 
You had finished second in the standings, not first like you had dreamt of, but Felipe told you that first place in the championship would come in F1, don’t worry. 
And you weren’t sure who had made the seating chart, but from where you sat, you could easily see Daniel at his table, only a few metres away from your own. He sat with some of his friends and some people from his personal team. He was also purposely avoiding looking in your direction, knowing that if he did, he’d be making eye contact for the first time in months. 
He’d see your stunning features and bright eyes standing out among the rest. He’d see the low cut, thinly strapped black dress, showing off the collarbones he used to mark with his lips, the trail between your breast and down to your navel that he used to make with his tongue. If he looked at you, he’d think of all the ways the night would have ended if things were different. 
If he looked at you, he’d be reminded that the girl he loved was the one who broke him. He’d be reminded that as hurt as he was by your actions, by taking his seat, he couldn’t forget the memories you made, the moments he shared, the way he used to admire you. 
He didn’t love you anymore, though. He couldn’t. He forced those feelings out, replacing them with regret for ever deciding to help you because if he hadn't helped you, it wouldn’t have been you that took his seat. 
So Daniel looked at the stage, his friends, his food. He didn’t look at you. 
He didn’t even look at you when you walked up to collect your trophy, choosing that moment to be the perfect time to walk up to the open bar. He ordered a few more drinks and a shot on a whim, downing it back before walking to the table, 2 freshly poured glasses of rum and cokes in hand. 
Daniel got drunk that night. He didn’t mean to, but it helped him deal with all he had going on. It was a good way to end the 2022 season, to put it behind him. You, McLaren, all of it. 
Someone should have stopped him when he noticed you about to leave at the end of the night, a white coat draped over your shoulders. That should be my blazer, Daniel thought, thinking of the countless nights he had given you his jacket for warmth. 
You were in the middle of a conversation with someone from Prema when you felt a tug in your arm. When you looked up and saw it was Daniel who was pulling you off to the side, your heart sank. There were no butterflies anymore, just a lot of anxiety and guilt eating you from the inside. 
You could tell he hadn’t thought through what he was going to say. For a split second, his gaze was soft, almost like he thought about congratulating you for a successful season. For a moment, proud Daniel was back and for a moment, you got your hopes up. Maybe this line you broke could be fixed.
It was a bad sign when his eyes grew cold, features hardening along with them. This man, who was all you wanted, stared at you like you were a stranger, and maybe you were now. 
He opened his mouth and the room around you fell dark and quiet. It was your mind playing horrible tricks on you, putting a spotlight in this moment in time so it would haunt your memories after tonight. You knew the earth was still spinning, that people around you were still moving, but you couldn’t trust anything, frozen in this space with Daniel. 
“I hope you’re happy,” Daniel spoke softly, but his words cut through you like a knife. If someone told you that your heart was bleeding, you’d believe it. That’s certainly what it felt like.
He didn’t want you to be happy. He didn’t want you taking his seat. He didn’t want to see you live out his dream. He put on a beautiful charade for the press, but deep down you knew, he saw you as nothing more but a mistake. He no longer wanted you to succeed, despite telling the world he wished you would. 
"Daniel-"
You automatically reached for him and he flinched backwards. It hurt, seeing him react how he was. He didn’t want you touching him, he just wanted to get one more word in, wanted you to know that he was still bitter and would be for a while. 
You stood there and watched him walk away, haunted by the pain and broken trust in his eyes, a look that would become burned into your mind during your restless sleeps. 
And then there was the week where you just didn’t sleep. The week after Daniel’s contract with Red Bull was announced. 
He wasn’t driving with them, but he wasn’t leaving Formula 1 either. 
He’d still be around the paddock during selective race weekends. He’d be there, putting on a show for the fans because everyone loved him. Everyone wanted him on the grid, and if he couldn’t race, at least he was still there in the garage as a reserve driver. 
The same excitement couldn’t be said for you. 
Despite forming a close bond with Lando really early into the pre-season, it helped that he was only two years younger than you, you were not met with open arms and loud cheers. 
You had some supporters, a lot actually, but nothing compared to Daniel’s fans. You were pulled alert and critiqued for every move you made. You could understand the questions that circulated when you didn’t even finish the first race in Bahrain, retiring early because of an engine problem. Did Zak really make the right move by replacing Daniel with you? What could you bring to the team if this was how you started the season?
But it was the talk about what you did off the track that really got to you. You didn’t care if people weren’t a fan of your driving, you knew F1 fans had their favourites and you knew you weren’t everyone’s. 
However social media had a way of spinning everything. You lost count of the ridiculous rumours. Apparently, you were now replacing Daniel with Lando because that playful interview you did talking about red flags in relationships really gave away the fact you were sleeping together. 
Oh you were also sleeping with Mick Schumacher, because you had a thing for reserve drivers, it seemed. And the way he found you after your second race without points again in Saudi Arabia made it so obvious that you were with him. 
And you couldn’t forget about how big of a bitch you were, choosing to not acknowledge Daniel in Australia when you walked past him in the paddock. It was his home race, he was the reason you were even racing, and you couldn’t even stop and give him a smile? 
These rumours were truly getting annoying.
Of course, you couldn’t come out and tell people that Lando was seeing someone because it was so new and private and not your story to tell. No one cared that Mick was your teammate at Prema in 2020 and you guys had always been friends. No one would believe you if you said that you didn’t even see Daniel in the paddock, being too engrossed in your conversation to notice that the Australian was walking past. 
You grew to hate seeing him during race weekends. 
It was a constant reminder of what could have been. 
What if you had waited a year and signed with McLaren then? Would Daniel still hold this hatred towards you if his contract played out like it was supposed to? 
What if you signed with a different team like Williams instead, and someone else replaced Daniel? If Oscar Piastri had taken his spot, would Daniel be this resentful still to see you driving? Or would he happily walk by your side in the paddock, him in Red Bull polo, you in your Williams racing suit? Would he have accompanied you during the race weekends when he didn’t have Red Bull duties?
Was there ever a scenario where he stood in your garage and watched you race? Cheering you on, despite what place you finished? Despite where he was in his own career?
Or was that just a far fetched dream? 
Because let’s face it, if Daniel was still racing this year, it would be hard to support you and focus on his own season. How could he be happy if he DNF’d and you finished in the points? How could you be happy if the media would say that you were only using Daniel to get ahead? 
If you had signed for Williams and Daniel was still replaced, it would be difficult for him to watch you race, to watch you do what he loved. How could he be in your corner when he no longer had a corner of his own to stand in? 
Maybe you were doomed from the start. Fragile line, you said. How true that was. It was always going to snap.
You heard through the grapevine that Daniel had said you taking his seat before his contract was even up was the worst thing you could have possibly done. 
Was that in regards to McLaren? To your relationship? From a sportsmanship standpoint? You had no idea. You just knew Daniel wasn’t impressed that you were racing and he wasn’t.  
You hated seeing him during the few races he attended. You were petrified to run into him in the paddock, in the pit lane, in the hotel for christ sakes, you didn’t want to see him. At one point, you were desperate for even just a smidge of attention from him and now you felt sick whenever you heard he would be in attendance.
You went five races in a row without scoring any points. You could practically hear Daniel’s smug expression when you crossed the finish line each time. He was probably eating this up, knowing you were the one struggling now. 
The only difference was, you didn’t have him to turn to after a shitty run in the McLaren. 
Lando tried to be helpful, but he was struggling too. People called the car a tractor and honestly, so did you and Lando in private. You had a group chat with your personal trainers and the four of you called yourselves the farmers. The jokes made and lighthearted conversations shared were the only silver linings during this depressing start of a season.
Monaco was better, sort of. 
You finished 10th, so at least that was a point under your belt. 
But Daniel was everywhere. 
He loved Monaco, he lived in Monaco, of course it was no surprise he was there that weekend.
You found yourself jogging past his flat the Thursday before the race, and you didn’t do it on purpose but it was the same route you had taken all of those times you had spent days on end at Daniel’s. Sometime he joined you for those morning runs, sometime you’d return and he was making breakfast.
But you came to a stop on the opposite side of the street and stared up at it, recognising his balcony instantly. You saw the plant in the corner that you had given him a few months into your relationship and despite him claiming he wasn’t a plant guy, he managed to keep it alive.
Your heart felt heavy. All you wanted was to knock on his door and be welcomed in with wide arms and that stupid smile of his. You wanted to not feel anxious when you saw him in the paddock. You wanted to not be holding your breath every time you got out of the racecar, wondering what Daniel thought of your run. 
You were simultaneously on edge at all moments while also still dying to make him proud. You didn’t think that would ever go away.
Even during the weekends he wasn’t there, you were looking over your shoulder constantly. Even if you knew that he was on the other side of the world, he was still on your mind. He haunted your thoughts from the moment you walked into the garage to when you got out of the car at the end of the race weekend.
Lando called you out on it that Thursday in Silverstone.
“You’re in your head,” he told you, seeing how your main focus wasn’t racing, it was Daniel. You were unsure what he was referring to though and Lando just rolled his eyes, “Well actually, Daniel’s in your head. And he’s keeping you from being the driver I know you can be.”
That was all he said on the topic. 
And he was right.
You were so worried about Daniel. About what he would think of your races. About trying to avoid him during the weekends he was there. About still trying to make him proud but not too proud where he resented you more for taking his seat. About the hundreds of scenarios that could have happened if you had made a different choice.
Because of all of these thoughts, that seat at McLaren was still very much Daniel’s. You allowed it to be.
You needed to stop telling yourself you took his seat because that’s what it would always be then, his seat. Lando stood up, patting your knee after dropping those few words and you decided right then and there that it was your seat. 
You wouldn’t let Daniel haunt you anymore. 
And qualifying was where this new mentality really showed. 
You were buzzing with energy when your engineer told you that you had gotten P3 and were starting on the second row for tomorrows race. You climbed out of the car in parc ferme and ran directly to Lando. He hugged you, he was proud of you. 
“That’s the driver we all know,” Lando said when he pulled his helmet off. His hand was on your shoulder, both of you were wearing identical smiles of pure joy. “Where the hell has she been all this time?”
You didn’t even have an answer, too excited about what this meant for you, for the team. You post-quali interviews went by in a blur, your hands were shaking the entire time. You blacked out during it, still trying to process the fact that you had finished third in qualifying, but you did remember Lando reaching over at one point and dropping his hand to your knee. It was polite, it didn’t mean anything more than a playful stop shaking you’re making us all look bad, but god did the media run with it. 
You didn’t let anything on social media get to you, telling yourself that you had to stay focused for the race. In fact you even gave your phone to your trainer, Oliver, asking him to take it for the night and to just wake you up in the morning.
And Oliver was a good trainer, he had also become a good friend since you joined McLaren so you trusted him with your phone. 
Which meant he knew your password. 
So when he saw your phone light up that night with a text from Daniel, Oliver panicked. He knew the right thing to do would be to just leave it alone, you’d see it in the morning. You’d see the message. The short but seemingly sweet;
P3, nice job
But a text like that would send you spiralling and you didn't need that before one of the most important races of the season for you, Oliver knew this. He knew you were supposed to be getting over Daniel, he knew how much the Australian just being in the paddock messed with your mind. He knew you had to focus on racing.
There was so much uncertainty with the text. Was this him extending an olive branch? Was he genuine, or was this supposed to be taken with a bit of salt? Oliver could read it both ways. Either Daniel was truly happy for you, or this could be dripping with sarcasm. P3, sure, but remember who’s seat you’re in.
Oliver decided to delete the text. There was no trace of it when he handed the phone back to you the next day. 
Maybe that was for the best, no one knew. 
All you knew was you were starting third today.
All Daniel knew was you had ignored him, and now you were walking right past him down the paddock, side by side with Lando as you talked about today’s race. Daniel turned his head and saw the two of you, drawing his own conclusions. 
Whatever was going through his mind, one thing seemed certain. You didn’t need him anymore. You had the seat, the team, someone new supporting you, why would you still need Daniel?
You went about your day, the same pre-race rituals. Lando checked in more than normal, it was an exciting day for both of you, but he knew he was also a good distraction to keep your mind off of Daniel, he knew you would be struggling to keep from thinking about him. 
“It’s you and me,” Lando told you right before the race. “It’s our day, yeah? We’ve got this.”
Lando was in your corner. You were in his. 
Which meant you were there to celebrate after the race when he took home second place. You had claimed fourth, which was also something to be proud of, and you were, but you were also craving that podium. You could almost taste it, it was so close. 
“Next time,” Lando assured you, having full confidence that you’d be holding the trophy at the following race. He handed you a bottle of champagne, telling you to drink up and enjoy and for once, you did. 
You were happy. You finally felt like you could accomplish something amazing at McLaren, despite the horrible start. Lando had gotten a podium, yours was coming, you could feel it. 
You didn’t think about Daniel at all that night. It was the first night in a long time where you didn’t see his face when you closed your eyes. 
And you would have loved to keep celebrating after that night, to keep the high of Lando's podium and your 4th place finish last until the next race, but all good things must come to an end. 
You stood in front of Lando now, unsure how to take the news about Daniels’ return. Were you allowed to be happy for him? Of course you wanted to see him in a seat, this was the ideal situation, both of you driving this season. What would this mean for the two of you moving forward?
But he had done the exact same thing you had done by replacing a driver before their contract was up.
Daniel made you feel awful about that decision and now here he was, making the exact same one. He was no better than you. He was no hero, he wasn’t the good guy. He was a driver, desperate for a seat, as were you. As was every single person wanting to race in this series. 
You were on the same playing field now.
He was going to be at every single race for the rest of the season, as a competitor on the grid. Something you once dreamt of, both of you dreamt of, was finally coming true. 
But that’s all he would be. A competitor. Another driver. Another car to overtake. You always thought that when this moment came, you’d still be a team when you left the track at the end of the day and that just wasn’t the reality you found yourself in. 
“He’s back,” Lando said, hands shoved in his pockets trying to gauge your reaction. 
Daniel was returning to Formula 1, but you knew he was never actually gone in the first place.
He was in your thoughts, your dreams, your memories, he was everywhere all of the time. Even when you crossed the finish line in Silverstone, there was still a part of you that was wondering if Daniel was watching. As much as you tried to avoid him, your eyes still scanned every single crowd for him.
And now you didn’t need to look anymore. 
part 3 gone
----
taglist: @yunnie-f1 @torossosebs @whatthefuckerr @jspitwall @oconso @tsarinablogs @landowecanbewc @somanyfandomsbruh @christianpulisic10 @storminacloud @sunnytkm23 @formula1mount @azxulaa @icarus-nex @spideyspeaches if i forgot someone im so sorry
1K notes · View notes