#i got a little petty here but im literally so mad

[surrowndedbylights]

Now that my country (finally) decided to vote for marriage and adoption equality, I have to share my thoughts because I've been keeping them for too long.

This is going to be a long post so if you want to see more it's under the cut.

This has been such a huge debate for a while now, and I was always so mad about it. If you are lgbtq+ and have been in a similar situation, you probably know how it feels, but if you're not, I'll try to explain. Having literally everyone talking about my life and my rights, when they don't even have the slightest knowledge of what queer people have gone through in order to have equal rights around the world and it seemed so crazy to them that we would want it too. Even the church had an opinion when it has literally NOTHING to do with them. We are talking about political decisions about civil marriage. Your opinion is very much not needed, especially if its aim is to spread hatred towards a community that has suffered so much and the last thing we want is people with zero knowledge going around and preaching that we don't deserve to exist and have our basic human rights. We have the government to decide about laws and stuff, this is not theocracy for fuck's sake. There were also a lot of politicians talking shit about us, as if we are some kind of animals, but since they are part of the parliament, I was prepared for it and sucked it up.

Children adoption has also been on the table in these past months, and of course, everyone would have an opinion about it too. Basically, the only thing they could say to justify their bigotry was "You'll ruin the traditional family." I mean, if their perception of a 'traditional' family is couples who have children just because they can have them, but end up neglecting, abusing or abandoning them, then yes, I would very gladly ruin it. If there are families who abandon their kids in institutions, then there should also be families who are willing to take said kids in, no matter if they are gay or straight. And gay people don't have many choices. They can't reproduce like straight couples do. So, when a couple is relying on adoption to start their own family, then why would they not have that option? "Children need a mother and a father!" Children need someone who can take proper care of them and give them love. There are kids that grew up in such families, and they are no different than kids with straight parents. There are also those who grow up with only one parent, and they still turn out fine. It doesn't have to do with genders. You are just being homophobic. And no, they are not going to become gay because of that. Most of us grew up in straight environments, and yet we are not straight. But even if they do turn out to be queer, then they will know that their parents accept them and they won't have to spend their teenage years pretending to be someone else because they are afraid to be kicked out and whatnot.

I'm tired of everyone having a say in what I do. Queer people are not pawns in some game. To some, it may seem shocking, but we are still humans who have needs and rights. The fact that this was such a huge topic when it should go without saying. There are people who had to move to another country in order to marry their partners. We watched for so long, happy married couples in other countries. We were anxiously waiting for this decision to be made because we want to have equality. But, of course, according to some people, we are just sick and entitled and want to take over the world and destroy it. If you really believe this, then I'm sorry you're sad since yesterday. Learn how to get over it now 😘

[hannah-shipper-banana]

I, personally, will NOT tolerate any Ally Dawson slander. That’s my bby girl.

How can you say Austin cared more about her than she did for him? Girlie was most definitely in love.

Just for that, here are some things Ally did for him…

Season 1

. She forgave him for stealing her song.

.She literally forgave him for humiliating her on live TV AND agreed to be his songwriter even though they were literally like 14 years old.

. She fricking WROTE most of his songs for him despite the fact that she had a JOB and school and a life! She also went through a lot writing said songs.

. Everyone (especially Austin) was being a massive dick to her for not having a song despite that fact that she had a life of her own and a store to run and whatnot. That got me so mad. Poor girl was literally getting pressured by everyone.

. She encouraged Austin to do good things so that Tilly couldn’t get any bad footage of him.

.She attempted to perform,despite the fact that she had stage fright, so that Tilly would stop posing embarrassing footage of him. Even when he told her she didn’t have to go through with it, she still tried. (He eventually did it for her but its the thought that counts)

.Ally gave him Dougie the dolphin.

. She defended him and told him to hide when everyone thought Austin was the Mall thief. Home girl fully stood up to a whole mob by herself.

. She helped him overcome his fear of umbrellas.

. She forgave him for ‘accidentally’ playing her song on the radio and went through with his plan of Trish pretending to be her.

. She helped him get with Cassidy by writing him a song. (Yh the first one was bad but that’s literally what he told her to write. Heartbeat was a banger tho)

. SHE FRICKING GAVE UP THE CHANCE TO GO TO AN ELITE MUSIC SCHOOL (WITH A FULL SCHOLARSHIP) SO THAT SHE COULD CONTINUE TO WRITE SONGS FOR HIM! AND HE WASN’T EVEN THAT BIG YET!

Season 2

. She performed with him (despite the fact that she had stage fright) by pretending to be Taylor Swift.

. She bungee jumped off a bridge with him (yh it was to cover up her lie but…) so that he could make a good impression with the magazine editor.

. Ally was fully ready to accept her punishment from her dad so that Trish and Dez could buy Austin more time so he can run home before his parents get home (yh he still got in trouble but that was only because the fan page alerted his parents, he would’ve gotten away with it) Yes I know Austin was selfless this whole episode but Im trying to prove a point here ok? Also can I just say it was so obvious they liked each other from this episode

.She helped him plan a date FOR ANOTHER GIRL despite the fact that she started having feelings for him. And she pulled out all the stops too because she knew he liked Kira

. She could’ve outed him then and there to Kira that they kissed but she literally just walked away.

. Ally wasn’t petty or mad when she thought he chose Kira over her. She was accepting.

. Ally still wrote a song about him even though she was a little mad at him. (He then serenades her and wins her back with said song)

.Ally still offered to write him a song (the only time she could was 4am) despite having her own career to focus on, and he declined. And at the last minute offered to give him one of hers but he though they were too girly.

. Home girl was ready to give up her song (the most personal one she’s ever written) to Kira, so that Kira could consider asking Jimmy to sign Austin again. (Kira is a literal sweetheart and let Ally sing it herself but…) Also Austin was fully ready to let Ally take his place at Starr Records but Ally wasn’t having that either.

. Ally gave him his own songbook to write his music in.

. Ally wanted him to enjoy his youth, so convinced him to stay on the basketball team despite what Jimmy said.

. She helped him makeover his idol Jackson Lowe and get him back into stardom

. She forgave him for meeting with another songwriter despite the fact that he was being a drama queen and she had more of a right to be mad at him.

. She was ready to give up making her debut album just so that she could go on tour with him but Trish had to convince her not to.

Season 3

. Ally fully came just to see them (mainly him) despite that she was working on her own music. Even if she saw him for 3 days she was ready to drop everything to see him.

. She decided to stay on tour with him because she missed him too much and didn’t want to miss his first tour. He begged her to stay and she did.

.She distracted the tour guide and the press on numerous occasions so that he can escape with the silver shoes and not get in trouble.

. Ally fully adopted an ALIAS and risked losing her record deal, just so she could continue to write songs for him. Even when she had second thoughts, Austin convinced her to go through with it and she did.

.She then stood up to her FUCKING BOSS and risked losing her record deal because she refused to stop writing songs for him. She was not going down without a fight.

. She helped him with his Physics project and even made the paper plane for him. (He didn’t end up using it but he would’ve gotten an A if he did)

. Ally was the one who helped Austin overcome his stage fright and basically the one who pulled him out of his funk.

.Ally was such a supportive wifey that episode. Firstly she tried to hide the magazines with the bad review on Austin so he wouldn’t be hurt. Then she always convinced him to look at it positively. Then she became Swag Master Ally to pull him out of his funk.

.Then she gave him the ultimate pep talk which convinced him to perform in front of the critic.

.And of course she was his safety net when he was performing so he wouldn’t get nervous. He couldn’t take his eyes off of her.

.She knew something was off about Dwayne and started to investigate which led her to seeing that he was obsessed with Austin. She then came up with the plan to distract the butler so they all could escape.

. Ally helps him convince Dwayne Wade he wrote the song so he could stop being obsessed with him.

.She convinced him to go to prom and enjoy himself with Piper even though she still had feelings for him and she knew Austin was hesitant to leave her alone.

. Ally (and Trish and Dez) helped him escape Brooke.

. She (with everyone else, but especially her) didn’t want her dad to sell Sonic Boom because its where they had the most memories (its also where she grew up) and hatched a plan to convince her dad not to go through with the sale. (This is more everyone’s doing but still)

. Ally broke up with him (she really didn’t want to) because she didn’t want Austin to lose his record deal. And we all know how that turned out.

Season 4

. Ally gave up going on her tour so that she could stay in Miami with him for senior year because she knew she was gonna miss him.

.She (with Trish and Dez) begged him not to go to military school.

. She was the one who came up with the Music Factory idea so Austin wouldn’t have to work at his parents’ store forever, and he could get to do what he loves.

. She pushed him to do better in his exam so he could graduate with them

.She still made the giant pancake for him even tho he lost the bet, because she loves him and wanted to give him something for believing in her (🥹)

. Ally stayed up all night baking the 6 tier wedding cake he wanted but she really didn’t need to because everything was already done. She felt guilty that she didn’t help out more and wanted to make it up to him. (She even got cake all over her trying to get it to school)

. This isnt a point really but can I just say Ally was the only one who figured out that Flermy was Austin right away. Home girl knows her man when she sees him.

.Ally forgave him (and Trish) for not believing that she could pull off the performance at the awards show.

. Ally convinces him not to get in his head too much about his first performance since the break. She kept telling him not to listen to the fortune teller so that he wont get anxious.

.She tried to get him to think positively no matter how many things were going wrong. She even tried to lie when something the the fortune teller came true, so that he wouldn’t think what the teller told him would be true too. (That was a mouthful). Girlie was stressed for him this entire episode.

.She was the main one convincing him not to believe the negative prediction from the fortune teller.

.She tries to help him get out of the glass box.

. Ally lets the Austin impersonator stay in the music factory as Austin is coaching him. (Despite him making mess and making noise)

. Ally forgives him for losing her library book and lying about it (it almost didn’t allow her to graduate but she fixed that)

. ALLY GIVES AUSTIN HER SONGBOOK AS A GOODBYE PRESENT. Everyone knows her songbook is her firstborn child (sorry Ava). The songbook was basically her personal diary and contained all their memories she would’ve written down.

. Not to mention that the songbook had pre written songs in it so his career could continue while she was at school.

. Ally admits that she continued to write songs about him even though they were broken up.

. They sing a song she wrote about him, and that’s the performance that gets them back together.

. She agrees to officially become a musical duo with him. (Im now realizing this is yet another parallel to the pilot)

Just because Austin was more open with his love (and more dramatic) it doesn’t mean that Ally loved him any less.

Anyone with eyes can see that they’re both just as in love (and obsessed) with the other.

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

[chuplayswithfire]

Im sorry about this i need to rant. I thought things were getting better but Izzy stan Twitter is at it again with their whining, truth bending and self-victimising.

'Do you like OMFD but wish the queer disabled hero didnt die?' IZZY IS NOT THE HERO OF THIS SHOW!!!!! He is at best a reformed antagonist. What an insult to the other disabled characters, and what about the actual heroes of the show??

'We've been betrayed by straight man writing queer stories'. First of all, way to dismiss the other writers. Also, its not his fault you project your personal traumas and mental health on a fictional character on a show with death in the title.

'GB's ending is comphet (?????) because 'we only need eachother' and theyre breaking away from their queer community' ED HAS BEEN WANTING TO LEAVE PIRACY SINCE LAST SEASON!!! also, its progress that Stede was able to resist basic flattery. And David made it clear that they still have work to do. This one truly broke my brain.

Im just sick of all this. Izzy stans have been coddled for the past week, being told its ok to grieve, but theyve crossed multiple lines. I do wish some things had been more explicit in this finale, only because David overestimated the maturity and media literacy of some people.

Sorry for this but i needed to talk to people here. Its beyond annoyance at this point. Im angry and sick of petty crybabies actively working to poison what we've built.

go off anon my inbox is open to your ranting let the rage flow through you [insert palpatine dot gif] but ngl the best thing you can do is just block liberally. block everyone. block left, right, center. do not be merciful. do not hold back. block until the ceiling comes down!!

because like, some of these fans have spent the last 18 months convincing themselves that their little guy was of equal importance to the main characters, the secret third protagonist, and he just got put in a box.

🎶izzy's in a box 🎶izzy's in a box🎶izzy's in a box🎶

izzy was never a hero of this show. he was a villain and then a side character on a rushed arc to redemption for the specific purpose of making him into the kind of man who could apologize to ed for being a shit. but that's hard to swallow for people who were convinced he was always right, so. also let's be honest: they don't give a shit about the other disabled people on this show. a bunch of them were trying to figure out a way for it to be wee john who was killed, and kristian is actually a queer disabled actor. they're just mad it was their little guy who they latched onto.

also yeah like four of the writers are nonbinary people of color, and there's definitely more queer writers on the team, but somehow this was totally the decision of a straight white guy. alright folks come on now to quote your idol pack it in.

gentlebeard's ending is them deciding to give their relationship a go in a more relaxed and sedate environment than the high stress locale of a pirate ship. their friends ARE going to come see them again. just because they don't all live together in the same frat house i mean ship doesn't mean they're suddenly forever alone. also there is nothing comphet about shacking up with your gay lover in a soon to be literal loveshack.

but like you can't expect these folks to care about ed or stede or gentlebeard or anything that doesn't center their white man of choice. the only thing you can do is block because anyone still throwing a fit a week later is simply not worth it.

no need to apologize anon. return to my inbox whenever.

[sergeifyodorov]

calle, mikko and eichel for the send me a character ask thing >:)

hehehe taylorrrr <33

i confess im terrible at remembering my first impressions so thats gonna be the least filled out part but lets get INTO it

FIRST IMPRESSIONS

Cale: “Everyone has been talking about this man’s rosy cheeks and -- wow, he really does have rosy cheeks”

Mikko: [vague absorption of names you hear when you’re watching a game but you don’t know what’s going on][oh yeah that mikko rantanen guy is an av]

Eichel: “The guy who’s kind of bitchy”/ lbr it was mceichel slashfic

IMPRESSION NOW

Cale: Sweet little rosy-cheeked milkmaid of a babygirl. That hair looks like a baby bird. Dude is a nerd, and probably going to be the Avs’ next captain. That Conn Smythe run was memorable as hell, and I’ll always remember him as a playoff performer, even though the Avs are literally all hurt. Except Mikko.

Mikko: HART 2023 WINNER IN MY MIND. For some reason to me (ngl, my opinion on the Avs is “favourable but I don’t think about them”) he is the only Av who played the whole season -- he carried the entire fucking team through that early-season hell where everyone was really really hurt, as opposed to only mostly hurt like they were in the back half (plus Natemac was back). All this has cemented to me that he is an underappreciated big beautiful blonde moose of a man. Great tits as well if i have to be honest.

Eichel: My bitch wife. Mad respect for being apparently the only hockey out there who knows how to take care of his body (i see u going right down the tunnel when somethings wrong instead of trying to tough it out on the bench. Yesssssss). Robbed of the Smythe. People keep trying to say that he’s not better than McDavid -- this is obvious, but that’s not the point! Also I think it’s funny that that attitude (read: self-respect) has caused people (sabres fans) to note him as a locker-room cancer. It turned out that it made him a playoff performer instead. Not that I want VGK to win more Cups (for purely petty reasons, namely that my leafies should win out), but I do look forward to seeing him tear up the playoffs from here to kingdom come. Also, he’s not objectively handsome but i want him carnally.

FAVOURITE MOMENT

Cale: Just watching him skate/man the power-play. His edges are gorgeous, he’s really in the top tier of pure skaters out there. Also the Stroopwaffel Incident

Mikko: Hm. Probably that one media where they had Avs do the heart hand thing and he didn’t understand it? Himbo supreme. Just so large, and so beefy, and so stupid

Eichel: Do I really have to say it?

IDEA FOR STORY

Cale: He is the barmaid that the cowboy (natemac?) sees when he enters the mysterious Old West town’s saloon for the first time. He’s got this sort of quiet demeanour that everyone knows not to mess with, because he’s smart as a whip and he’ll get you if you don’t know what’s good for you. Maybe it turns out he’s also the rival gunslinger and we can have this Dark Cale against nate. (and then they kiss)

Mikko: Equal parts romcom boyfriend and werewolfcore. Werewolf boyfriend. I’m sure there are no paranormal romances with a plot that can be established in this manner

Eichel: I’m still on the mceichel train I prommy but I admit the eichel section in scheherazade was really quite fun… I’d like to stay a little bit in that universe, only not plunking auston in just having him already be there. The eichelston teammates to ex-teammates to teammates again to lovers. They could be gossipy haters together. They could kiss under the moonlight. 

UNPOPULAR OPINION

Cale: I think this new failgirl era (questionable concussion treatment) is a dangerous trajectory for him. We’ve already seen many, many NHLers with promising careers interrupted or cut short by concussion mismanagement, and Cale is one of the best and brightest of the younger generation. I’d hate to see him go down the path of someone like Kariya.

Mikko: HART 2023 WINNER IN MY MIND!!!

Eichel: I’m not sure if eichelthirsting is unpopular or not (or if any of my opinions are unpopular really), but that is what i’m going to say. I saw pictures of him post-Cup with his shorts rolled up all the way and that leg exposed to get the Cup tattoo, and. Awooga. 

FAV RELATIONSHIP

Cale: Cale x a good nights sleep, cale x stroopwaffel. I think natecale is probably a pleasing one, just because they’re both Canadian Weirdguys, but i’m going to be honest I haven’t read many Cale fics. (Yes, to anyone who might b reading, this IS an opportunity to drop your fic recs in here. Id love em)

Mikko: Arsirane, I don’t have time for messing around

Eichel: McEichel, just because of that juicy juicy Narrative. They don’t have any personal beef with each other, but if you lock them in a room I bet they’d complain to one another so much about the media that they’d start spontaneously kissing. 

FAV HEADCANON

Cale: ex-emo kid. We’ve all seen that one photo of him with the bad black hair dye job, whether it’s real or not. I would just like to state that I also believe he can bust out I Write Sins Not Tragedies on the karaoke machine if he is JUST this side of drunk and horny enough.

Mikko: Reportedly funny, but probably the kind of funny where about half the time he doesn’t realize that what he’s said is hilarious, but everyone else laughs at it anyway (he doesn’t mind this. It’s a point of pride)

Eichel: im gonna vote him Most Likely To Kiss His Teammates Platonically On The Mouth 2k23

[aztarion]

Happy Valentine’s Day, lovely person 🌹

It’s been wonderful to see your art! I really love how you draw Mason and your style in general and am looking forward to seeing more of your art!

Here’s a romance-themed OC question for any OC(s) of your choosing (no pressure to answer on Valentine’s day itself, or at all):

What combination of random objects would your OC use to describe their LI? What do they represent? Bonus question: What would their LI use to describe them?

AND HAPPY belated VALENTINES TO YOU 🥹

im sorry i didnt get to this earlier, i was waiting to be more awake but im literally getting worse LOL. but it made me so happy ;_; thank you thank you thank you, for being far too kind abt my art 😭 im so fuckingglad i finally got a tablet during my crazy ass wayhaven renaissance because there could not be a sweeter group of people to share stuff with 🫂♥️

for the oc ask… well i just gotta do dev/mason theyre in my minds microwave 24/7 rn (hope the ceiling fan falls on them btw)

some of this is a bit more association than true description of character bc i could go on forever listing stuff for both of them.. but for dev w mason it would be two big things at their current standstill:

- marlboro reds; her favourite — she is in the middle of quitting smoking in book 1 so him constantly lighting up with her cigs of choice, as well as just being rude and grating on her already thin nerves, drove her barking mad insane. by book 2 she is floundering hard and asks for one after he shows up at the station. when he says no and that she’s supposed to be quitting she gets a bit pissed and makes him put out smokes anytime thereafter out of pettiness. also reds…… strong, numbingly intense, addictive, etc. sums up the early stages of their arrangement :D

- definitely the wolf cub from the carnival game! deva is hugely sentimental (to a concerning degree — she is a hoarder yay disaster apartment option) though would never admit to it. she still keeps raggedy decades old stuffed animals from when rook was around that she just cannot say goodbye to 🤦‍♀️ and she refuses to let herself get attached to mason on any meaningful emotional level so those budding feelings in book 3 kind of manifest on the wolf cub without her realizing it (i was so glad there’s a little part abt the detective saving their carnival prize after the apartment gets flooded because Very Deva, that thang is her whole support network) (plus when mason inevitably bails during the night she has smth to cuddle because objects dont leave no sir . Rebecca get this girl a therapist)

- and one smaller thing im still playing w is red jasper crystal 🙇🏻‍♀️

maybe she sees them in the crystal store. I colour pick from these when i draw him LOL

for mason wrt deva — not an object but just straight up chaos tbh. at where they are in book 3 i imagine every time he sees the detective his brain is going question mark question mark. and hes definitely not sentimental in the way Dev is that certain objects would have any sort of emotional stir in reminding him of her. mason definitely goes more on how she makes him feel; really fucking good, really fucking confused, really fucking messy (like her apartment which he HAAAAATES), and on a few occasions now… weirdly serene. cant make sense of it; doesnt even understand why hes bothering TRYING to make sense of it but here he is and it’s happening and it has never happened before and THAT is probably the best way he could encapsulate her at this point in their relationship… other than, yknow, encapsulating in other ways 🫢

ty so much for sending this and sorry for sleepy rambling!!!! AND COME OFF ANON LET ME DRAW SMTH FOR YOU♥️♥️♥️

[0xo]

tw abuse & transmisogyny tho

it is kind of nuts that on the flipside of having incredible trans relationships, i've also been treated like dirt by former partners who happened to be transfem, and it like... sucks. hard. to feel a little bit unable to talk about how they treated me for fear of people interpreting that as me not loving or respecting trans women.

like. idk. especially one ex in particular. having my life threatened and being emotionally/physically/financially abused really really really sucked. especially because i loved her a lot and still really, really care about her. it took literally years for me to tell the full story to our mutual close friends because. i didn't want them to cut her out of our community. like "exile abusers" blah blah blah but she NEEDED friends and support, she was also going through a hard time, the last thing she needed was for every local friend she had to drop her or talk shit about her. even if she did really really mean things to me. i still want her to be happy.

it was hard telling k about what actually happened because he was so mad, not at me but at her, asked why i didn't tell the whole story sooner, all that. and all i could say was that i was afraid she would get more hurt. i didn't want her to be isolated. and i asked him, if you knew what she'd done, would you have been so nice that day when she showed up and scared the hell out of me? and he said no, i would've understood why you were so scared, i would've told her to leave. and i said EXACTLY, she wasn't in a state to leave, she needed a soft place to land. even if it meant she broke a promise to me. don't you get it? i didn't want her to end up dead. i still had an obligation to her to try and keep her safe.

i don't know. like. there is no such thing as a perfect abuse victim and you don't have to forgive your abuser or try to make things easier for them or protect their reputation from the truth of what they did. i just. couldn't let it all blow up immediately, right? i could only tell the truth after she was in another place, a better mental state, with more support that wasn't connected to here or our mutual friends.

and it's weird because we're still kind of friends, sort of. and i still care a lot about her. she has so so so many good traits, she's talented and beautiful and smart, and. i didn't want the way she treated me to get in the way of her recovering and having a good life. i want to believe it was all a really really big mistake, that she didn't mean it, that it was just the drugs and the sobriety attempts talking. and pushing and threatening. like yes take responsibility for how you act but also, maybe, that wasn't really her. maybe she's really actually a great person and we were just in a really difficult situation. i know that's not realistic but god i hope maybe she didn't mean it.

idk. abuse makes you feel absolutely insane sometimes. five years later im still grappling with that. the gender layers just make it more complicated because i never wanted to be that asshole who ruins the life of a trans woman over petty stuff. but it. wasn't petty stuff, and i know that and i have witnesses, it was genuinely bad. and i still couldn't/can't bring myself to write her off as a terrible person. because i really and truly don't think she is one. i believe she's changed and i believe she's better and i believe she's got the potential to do amazing things.

and i'm not looking for brownie points by saying all this, i'm not trying to paint myself as a saint for the act of still treating her like a human. i was never perfect. and i don't want to hold it over her head, okay? that's not what this is about. i am not a wonderful person for trying to forgive her. i am just trying to minimize the damage for both of us.

i'm just. still processing. and i think the way i had to handle it kind of complicates things. i've had people accuse me of "protecting abusers" because i don't really publicly talk much about what she did, i don't "warn" people about her. but. it's not necessarily anyone's business? they're not entitled to know the details of one of the worst periods of my life just so they can get some sick glee out of regurgitating it, using it as a reason to alienate her... using my pain as social currency. it's not their business. especially if she's changed her behavior? she doesn't treat her wife like she treated me, thank god. and if i'd gone out to crucify her... i don't think she would've gotten better. she may have hurt me but i don't want to hurt her in return. she doesn't deserve that. i didn't deserve cruelty from her and she doesn't deserve cruelty from me.

i'm not looking for validation that i've done the "right thing." i'm not sure there is a "right thing" to do coming out of all that. i just need to talk about it a little bit. because maybe other people who've survived shit situations need to hear that it's okay to have complicated feelings.

but her changing for the better doesn't. erase. what happened or how it affected me. the flashbacks and nightmares and general fear and anxiety. the added layer onto my pre-existing ptsd. it's difficult to process and talk about. it's affected the way i relate to people and my ability to trust. (i'm forever grateful that my current girlfriend saw what was happening and stepped in to protect me... sometimes i only really feel safe when i'm with her, because i know she's not going to hurt me or let anyone else hurt me. i can actually relax when she's around. she's safe.)

and idk, i guess the thing is, i could've let that experience turn me bitter towards trans women. i could've blasted my ex publicly and tried to ruin her life, and i probably could've succeeded at it. but. i never wanted that. i needed to be away from her, and she shouldn't have done those things, but i was never willing to turn it into a witch hunt. and it was a trans woman who came to protect me when i thought i was going to be murdered! it was my trans fem partners that helped me get out and get safe. i owe them my life. they didn't have to help me but they did.

so it's confusing to me that some people are so transmisogynistic because... what, a trans woman was a little rude to you on the internet? she called you out on your transmisogyny??? you feel personally emotionally attacked or some shit?

like. please get real. you're just hateful. not to be like "oh i got over a horrible experience so you should shut up," but. i lived through hell, i was abused by a trans woman, and i still don't have a nasty attitude about trans women in general. so i think some of you should shut the fuck up. trans women have every right to be angry and snarky when you treat them like shit!!!

i think it's just. difficult. to watch people act like fuckheads. i deeply, deeply love and respect the trans women in my life - including the ones who hurt me. and some of these assholes are throwing hissy fits about jokes and well-deserved criticisms of how they treat/talk about trans women. like. just admit you don't like trans women specifically. don't pretend you're being attacked. i know what being attacked is and, i gotta say, it's NOT that!

wishing people would view other people, especially trans women, as Real Actual Humans and not just a collection of their worst moments. it's so dehumanizing and so blatant and i'm sick of it

[lindszeppelin]

okay so yesterday the twitter hive got into a frenzy over V posting *checks notes* ...for posting.... *double checks notes from confusion* .....darla the dog that Austin left with her when he went to go film for Elvis.

no but fr they're heated over it. they are also assuming she was shading him with a post she reposted to her story about not giving things energy but like..that literally could be nothing but a regular post. ppl were saying things like "she never deserved him" and just really being whiny little bitches about it. personally, i don't really like V but saying something like that about a relationship you weren't in and know actually nothing about is wild, no!? it's giving unhealthy levels of parasocial relationship. they don't even like her— how did anyone see her STORY? when i thought to try and offer a different perspective i just figured it was for nought bc it doesn't seem like any of them would listen to reason. i don't give a shit she still has the dog...clearly he doesn't care. shouldn't they be more mad at that then anything? "it was his MOTHERS dog!!1!!11" yeah and they were together for a decade, i'm sure he just thinks Darla was in better hands with V🤷🏽‍♀️, especially once he started doing the press tour/award campaign run for Elvis–he was barely home ever! i don't get the anger, it's petty and misplaced and immature and (maybe even naive?) to think she's(V) evil or some sort of horrible person for this one act. let me reiterate: they were together for a decade!!! im sure after his mother passed they took care of the dog together for the majority of their relationship so in my eyes, Darla is as every bit Austin's as she is V's.

and it's very obvious they are ASSUMING she was shading him rather than idk looking the other way(or never looking in her direction in the first place bc they do not like her anyway so why disrupt your own peace and happiness for THIS?) and pretending like she doesn't exist. or simply being levelheaded and logically thinking. i have to routinely pull myself back farther away from fandoms in general bc honestly i've never really been too deep into them for this exact reason— ppl just get a tad bit too creepy and weird for me. and this moment is making me wanna leave entirely..it's almost making want to like her again too out of spite for those ppl(almost, babes, almost lmao). it's just...icky to me is all. anyway, all this to say: thoughts? lol.

i don't like vanessa for many reasons, but the shippers will always think that she's shading him for no reason. this bitch is married, like...she has MOVED ON from austin in all kinds of regards. and like i said before, people will interpret things in their own personal way and that can be a curse. from my perspective, that quote vanessa shared TO ME read as "okay guys hang it up, i have moved on and everything is okay. let's just move on from this narrative".

also idk about the discourse surrounding darla and stuff but listen, if austin was perfectly fine leaving darla with vanessa after all this time then cool. he trusts her with his mother's dog. i mean clearly vanessa loves darla and i see the pics she posts with darla. cole seems to be a good surrogate dog dad to darla too from what i can tell. so...there is no problem here.

[luna7822]

remember when a majority of deep cut """"f^^s"""" used to be really chill until a whole ass year had passed before unfortunately being so divisive and hateful cuz some fictional character didnt need to win 24/7 to ne anywhere near """"pearl 2,0"""" or some shit as if its literally just the most cliche thing ever and therefore made frye 5t4n5 even worse and delusional beyond belief than they already are since theyre now completely greedy even AFTER they won like once or twice now if u were to count japan victories too as if both resulta from diff countries still matter?

me too ;-;

even if i didnt start playing splatoon 3 until i got the game a while after i got my switch in christmas of 2022 i feel as tho i wish ppl were better than this and that times would actually be more simpler for once when no1 hated shiver for just simply existing and taking Ws, no1 was begging frye to win 24/7 in the most dumb way possible and therefore taking everything too srsly for no reason whatsoever, and no1 was being an idiot and actively hating the game for no reason too cuz its unfortunate how awful ppl became ever since a harmless go to greeting splatfest happened or some shit like that since it just pisses me off when i feel like ALL deep cut members dont even deserve any kind of backlash or overpraise at all and that they really deserve to be treated like equals for once without some1 throwing pitchforks at shiver and/or big mam for even dare winning only once or twice cuz i hate how these sad indivduals have fallen over the past year tbh when they cant even treat them all with respect for once just as they deserve ;-;

dont get me wrong idc if frye won like once or twice or that the part where she wom again was kinda wholesome too in a sense but im saying this as some1 who thankfully didnt talked abt her 24/7 in the most boring way possible since its in all honesty the frye f^^base thats REALLY at fault here for not only overreacting everytime she just doesnt win as if she doesnt have to do it all the damn time since i feel like it would honestly get tiring if she did but also the fact that i dont appreciate how theyve been unneccessarily harassing any shiver/big man fans at all and also any1 who doesnt pick fryes team 24/7 since these ppl in all honesty are just very petty, overly obsessed with their dumb fantasies for a character that doesnt have to be perfect all the damn time, and hell even going as far to throw a huge ass tyrate over """"""unfair"""""" results screens as well when they cant even do any real math to know how it works besides stacks cuz i think they somehow have some favoratism problem with somehow wanting the same damn idol to win 24/7 cuz even then i barely understand their thought process at all when its literally just complete utter nonsense and also why i despise frye 5t4n5 in the first place for just overall being incredibly delusional and having the most pathetic behavior during turf wars and splatfests too and also why i hope that they lose so badly since they need to understand that their fav is not even anywhere near """"little miss perfect""""" at all and that they should just accept taking Ls for once like a normal human being should as if thats what they should be doing rn instead of getting mad over the most minor ass shit ever

no wonder why most of the oth fanbase is literally chill compared to most of the dc one anyways cuz i srsly think that frye 5t4n5 need to just chill tf out for once and overall just stfu for more than 5 fucking minutes when this ridiculious behavior of theirs has gone off for far too long atp and that i feel like we (ie ppl that are actually normal in a literal sense) should actually do smth abt this for once when the next splatfest happens instead of just letting them be even more pathetically stupid in nature than they already are since i just really want revenge against them so fucking badly u have no idea and i just hope that whenever big man and/or shiver has smth that i can agree with like usual next splatfest then u bet that ill be damn sure to get my revenge against those so called """""frye f^^s""""" one way or another since they really dont deserve anything anymore and ik not every f^^ of fryes is like this but its really rare to see any actual normal frye f^^s that arent miserable for no reason 24/7 tbh when even if i would be on like aliens, milk chocolate, wisdom or whatever without havimg to be on the same team 24/7 then i still wont tolerate their sad behavior at all when theyre in all honesty the reason why no1 cant be normal and have a good time for once unless ur from the japan side of things that i wish was just as chill as here in murica tbh and that its literally fryes f^^base thats THE problem and only the problem when most of the assholes there are unfortunately too problematic to even do anything fun and enjoyable anymore and therefore the reason why ppl need to just step up their game, take Ls like a normal person would/embrace losing, and just treat ALL deep cut members like equals for once without any dumbshit toxicity abt a harmless group of idols that barely did anything wrong other than existing in a fictional squid/octo game series thats meant to be played for fun whatsoever ;-;

basically reason number who knows anymore as to why i think theres no need for any hatred or unneccessary overpraise towards shiver, frye, and big man when ALL of them should be treated like a normal friendly silly trio of bandits for once instead of doing some unneccessary war abt them over quite literally the most ridiculious ass shit ever to the point where its literally no secret as to why most off the hook fans act better than those idiots do anyways if u dont count any idiots who treat shiver and pearl like """"guys"""" for no reason despite being lesbians as if its literally a GIRL ONLY thing and nothing more when it doesnt need to be anymore complicated than shit has already been for a long ass while now unfortunately ;-;

and overall i just hate most of the sploon f^^base in general for being so unneccessarily divded over the funni squid/octo game that in all honesty should be played for the sake of having fun and actually enjoying it for once instead of yelling abt stupid shit that doesnt fucking matter 24/7

this has been another episode of lunas rambles and shit and i hope that nobody throws shades at me over an actual harmless goddamn opinion for once and actually be fucking normal abt it for once istggggggg

[incarnateirony]

It appears the terfling (to their own self-blind damage) blowing cult and "dangerous trans man rebranded" dogwhistles instead of "trans man always existed on this name outside of your creepy fandom personas" is now incredibly offended by videogames. (see 2014 and earlier links lmfao)

Genuinely the little terfling just refuses to give up and is unable to detect their definitional psychotic and obsessive behavior. One attack after the next, one dogwhistle after the next, now screaming to Run Away From Video Games. Lemme guess, they make people violent?

Even more alarming is that people are enabling the clearly unwell and fixated behavior, and rather, joining in on it due to their own unwell fixated behaviors and agendas, blowing the dogwhistles with, clutching their pearls in unison, because they got server banned 2 yrs back.

2 weeks of nonstop fixation from this terfling in training. 2 weeks. and they'll go BUT IM TRANS I CHANGED NAME, great, so you're a traitor that's still blowing terf dogwhistles for petty social games that literally refuses to get off my dick.

Max, I don't know how to tell you, but your obsession is definitional psychosis. You'll lash back and froth and bite but at the end of the day, I've been trying to ignore you, and you literally refuse to let go. This is the DSM definition of MHI. Get help.

Like either get help or buy me dinner, because if you're gonna ride my dick this hard over your own issues, I better get something out of it. But mostly, I suggest getting the psychological help you and yours need to let go of your grudges and malices and buttburns.

It's time to process.

Your friends got banned. For being dicks. Rightfully. To protect server members. You then doxxed me and people I cared about, or supported, encouraged, and spread the results of people that did. You then ratcheted up a psycho level hate campaign, because you didn't like the truth, and are still pretending you can't see the finale is what I told you 2 years ago. Now, you're screaming terf dogwhistles left and right, parroting bog standard comically visible fascist rhetoric in your squealing, and going so far as to pearl clutch about FRIENDS PLAYING VIDEOGAMES.

You HAVE to understand that this behavior IS. NOT. WELL. Much less psycho fixating on someone's personal account you and yours chose to hunt down to begin with, and are now making nonstop hysterical terf sounds in the background that it exists, because LIKE fascists, you want to exterminate those you choose to dehumanize. We are not allowed to exist. You will hunt, you will attack, you will lie and libel, you will scream, and you will reach for every straw you can grasp even while you watch your weeks upon weeks of effort do *literally nothing*.

You don't care that it does nothing. You know you do nothing. You're mad you do nothing and I do Things, that's why you and your friends are so goddamn salty about being banned. You are here for the attention and taking out the anger that is a direct result of you and your friends own actions on someone that was more successful than you. End of story. Get over it. See a shrink. Jesus fuck.

You lost. The server, the show, and frankly the social media universe you're playing your games in and now muted on accounts like [redacted while insanely laughing]. Guys it's over.

If you don't want the rest of your friends to meet the same silenced fate, maybe you should all shut the fuck up pronto.

I told you. I am the one that controls the fog. Parse that how you want in the context of this post, and start coping hard, get out of the cheeto dust and go see a therapist.

[notessek]

absolute minor vent on my sideblog of sideblogs bc it literally. is so insignificant. and yet. vent. and its got so little to do with this sideblog but i dont want it on main lmao

this is all exclusively irl to be clear. but i get so frustrated talking to people abt dnd - although other things to but its really evident when abt dnd - because it turns any conversation one sided. like i do enjoy hearing about peoples dnd adventures and their experiences w dnd, and i invite them! i ask! but it never turns reciprocal. and when i try and add in my own thoughts it makes me look selfish for interrupting, and i often dont get to say my 2nd sentence that would link my part back to the conversation. and this sounds sooo specific but thats because it is!!! this exact conversational framework has happened so much!!! and its just. disheartening.

like i know my prose is a bit too purple, and i know i often dont feel heard by my peers, which is why i very much make the active effort in my friendships to let people talk about the things they love. to let people wax lyrical about their dnd characters or their fanfic or their favourite indie musician on bandcamp, because when the hell else in life do you get to talk about that? i don’t!! so i want to give people that oppotunity!! and i love hearing about what other people are passionate about!! literally its one of my favourite things. but i just wish sometimes that maybe i could say more than a silly 1 liner joke and people would see that platform for what it was. and offer me the chance to talk about my dnd character or my fanfic or my weird specific petty problem that i never get to talk about. idk man on one hand i literally invite this behaviour and then get mad thats its not about me. but on the other hand this happens every single fucking day of my life and i very much worry that people think i’m callow or shallow or selfish because i didn’t share my weird stories. but it would be worse to have done so!! and be rude!! idk. the pandemic laid waste to my social ability and im not being facetious here lmao. i just wish i knew how to make conversations more reciprocal without reneging my invitation to share.

anyway i have had this conversation so many times over the last 2 months where i mention i play dnd, and i find out all the other people’s thoughts about dnd but no one even knows that i play a cleric- like, the first thing i say about playing dnd - because we didn’t get that far into my dnd experience. and it’s fine, it’s petty, im not foaming at the mouth about it. all of these conversations were fun and good and i hope the other people thought so too. i just know a lot about how other people play or want to play dnd (or insert any topic here, bc this really is recurring) but no one wants to hear my opinion. and it just kinda sucks a bit.

cant stress enough: this is a non-issue, i dont care too much, this is a vent of the highest order. nothing matters with genuine sincerity or gravity. venting for the sake of venting.

[drunkjaked]

i saw a tik tok somewhere here on tumblr a couple days ago and i’m not sure if i saw it here or not but u seem rlly sweet so i’m gonna send u my thoughts about it!

anyways the tik tok was a compilation of clips of jake when he was angry and he was so HOT hjshjshjshjs so now i can’t get angry sex with jake out of my head 😵‍💫 he’s hot in general but like, angry jake is a million times hotter imo

so imagine you’re in public with him and you decide to tease him a little. at first you’re just doing small things that he doesn’t really catch on to (or so you think), like “accidentally” rubbing your ass against his dick when you squeeze past him to get something, leaning down so he can see down your shirt, etc.

but then this guy comes over and asks for your number and basically starts talking to you / flirting with you and when jake notices, he just clenches his jaw and waits for you to come back to him after telling the guy you have a boyfriend. but you keep talking to him and that pisses jake off. he immediately ends your outing and drags you back to the car opening your door and pushing you in kind of harshly (but not enough to actually hurt you or make you upset).

the ride home he’s a little petty― not telling you what’s wrong, not looking at you, not touching you, not even acknowledging your presence. when you get home he opens your door for you and pulls you out. as soon as you’re in the house, he’s for you pinned against the wall.

“you think it’s funny to tease me all day?”

“n-no i―”

“you like flirting with other guys in front of me? you think that’ll get you what you want? you know all you have to do is ask and yet here you are acting like a whore instead of telling me what you want from me.”

“that’s not what i―”

but he doesn’t let you finish talking. he gives you that look that you know means shut up and then takes you back to your bedroom.

“i’m gonna touch you and you don’t get to cum until i say so.”

you just whine and sit on the bed, legs spread for him. he starts fingering you and even though you want more, you know that if you say anything about it, it’ll only make things worse for you the rest of the night. so you stay silent.

and just as you’re about to cum, he pulls his fingers out and the knot in your stomach disappears along with your orgasm.

i just know he’d edge you until you felt like you couldn’t take it anymore. and then he’d overstimulate you until you have nothing left in you to give.

and afterwards he’d say sorry for being so rough but warn you that if you ever did anything like what you did that day again you’d get the same punishment or worse.

oops this got hella long i’m so sorry 💀

also could i maybe be 🐝 anon ?

hey omg someone did send an ask w the link to that so u might have seen it over here :)) and of course u can be 🐝 anon!

THIS IS LITERALLY SO SO FUCKING GOOD I HOPE U NEVER STOP SENDING ME LONG ASKS LIKE THIS??

jake would get so mad and lose his patience so quick, also smth abt being shoved into the car by angry jake is just 😵‍💫😵‍💫 wow need it AND WHORE YES JAKE SAY IT AGAIN!

“but he doesn't let you finish talking. he gives you that look that you know means shut up and then takes you back to your bedroom” ???? I CAN SEE THIS SO CLEARLY IN MY HEAD IM FREAKING OUT OH WOW PLEASE IM SO GLAD YOU SENT THIS OH MY FUCKGIGN FUCK????

🐝 anon u are a literary genius, i bow before u and kiss the ground u walk on 🧎 so glad to have u here + i hope u have a good rest of ur day!!

[iamtheempress]

Leaving a Bad Relationship, Hometown 1200 miles away

TW Emotionally Abusive Relationship (ex Fiance)

Hi if you know me well you know part or all of my current situation that led me to post this here.

I have been in a long standing relationship with my boyfriend for 6 years, he and i were a good match despite our geography and the fact we originally met online before becoming exclusive to one another.

4 years ago i took the leap and jumped into the next phase of our relationship and drove myself who was madly in love and reeling over the idea that my homestate kept me in a rut i couldnt escape, down from Connecticut to Arkansas to meet and eventually live with him; little did i know the storm i had incoming on the horizon.

I want to preface first all of the parts here that need to be made apparent so buckle in if you want to understand why the fuck im here and leaving as soon as possible.

As normal couples, we had minor arguements here and there in our apartment and they were if anything, petty, forgettable and to any other person easy to overcome as a unit. Come 2020 we started becoming closer and closer due to covid literally keeping us together in the same apartment, and our jobs being considered essential. Since 2020 i worked from home and since had no issue in it and i can stay with my new puppy who would soon become my best friend and emotional support animal.

My job became predomidantly all work from home so it was more than convienient, i was in favor of it because he used my car to get from home to work because BOTH of his trucks were inoperable and unpredictable. I would get groceries and other stuff delivered throughout the start of covid and still do to this day and with aid and discounts from my company.

Towards the end of 2020 he did something thag blew me away and made me the happiest woman in that moment on the planet.

He proposed to me.

2021. I being the newly proposed to fiance was more than elated to flaunt my proposal, made pinterest boards, looked up and down on Etsy for dresses and other little odds and ends for a wedding as one would do when they are absolutely in love and excited and ready to get started in prepping for a big day i never thought id see. I took care of this ring like it was my life line. Everyone in my one discord server and beyond knew i loved him and in my eyes he was mister perfect... never spoke a bad word about him.. ever...

Things  took a turn at one point.. during 2021 and then gradually startef to get worse when arguements, started by him that didnt really have any sort of reason as to WHY he was mad.. and his explanations were incredibly vague and from there i couldnt fix my problems.. so i started walking on eggshells and paying attention.. to everything... he became a hair trigger in terms of things to get angry at. And got worse. Much worse. Blaming me for everything and anything possible.

Claiming the reasons for how he talks to me were a fault of my own and if i want to continue living the life i dreamed w him, i need to stop what im doing thats making him so angry with me.

Again, no clarification just "if you paid attention youd know."

If there were times where anyone could be a fly on the wall in September on to now youd tell me to "GET OUT"  it wasnt a matter of what i was doing was bad, i just didnt know what the hell it was... and i was made out to be horrible and "the worst" because "i just dont see how bad i really am".

In late November i get a call from him i dreaded.

He wanted to call off the engagement. with some minor back and forth and of course my panic attacks rising and soon regular migraines.. i started to panic and i became scared and reserved, li.. the next day he tells me during an arguement the reason he broke it off is because

"i was too pushy to get married."

You read that right. I was too pushy because i looked up venues and dresses and how much everything would cost.. and made harmleas jokes about going to the courthouse to get married..

Thats the straw that broke the camels back and the end of us as i knew it because his whole personality did a full fucking 180..

He became cold and bitter to me... he wouldnt lift a finger to help me around the apartment, wouldnt pay any bills.. would COMPLAIN if i asked for money othet then rent or the cheap cheap electric bill... he wouldnt talk to me for days on end and if so it was short.. rude.. and cruel.

Everything about him prior wasnt affectionate but this was worse and it wasnt getting better.. he wouldnt address me as hun anymore.. hed address me as "woman" or "fatty" id go to sleep crying hating myself for letting it get to this and eventually blamed myself for us becoming boyfriend and girlfriend again instead of being his fiance..

He insisted from then to not say anything to our families to avoid the fall out and save face.

I agreed.. cuz i thought wed bounce back.

We havent and wont.

Needless to say after 5 months of realization and dispondency from what i assumed was my happily ever after is my waking nightmare, where im being picked on and bullied openly in xbox parties and keeping it silent when infront of people who love and care avout me. Im suffering and i got no relief or sympathy, and treated as "a mistake" "the worst"  and a multitude of other names and hurtful comments towards me as a person, a woman, and his ex fiance...

Theres plenty of other things i can say but honestly if you need proof i have 2 years of texts he and i shared as proof..

As of writing this i broke up with him 4/15 of this year..

He has admitted to me as of 5/8/22 he uas told me the reason why he treated me the way he did, since his personality shift from absolutely abhorrent and heartless to caring and kind was so drastic. His reasoning still shakes the foundation of what i know to be on the level of reasonable. Im quoting him here

After i asked him why he was the way he was for 6 months he said he wanted to "sever any and all relationships he had with friends, family, and me in order to 'disapear because no one will care about him'" and that he "gave up on that ever happening with me because i will still care" he never took into account how badly this would affect me mentally and socially as a person.

So as i post this today i have one request from yall who made it this far.. if you can help me during this time it would be appreciated.. i am going to be driving cross country with aid of my grandfather and as you know gas is pricey.. on top of that i have to pay my share of fees for the eviction pay and with me leaving in june and the date for eviction being in July.. i need help.. i have to pack my companion dog with me and several items ive accumulated over the years.. i never would have asked if my situation wasnt dicey and money consuming.. i will absolutely post an update when i am on my way home.

Im going to be going home May 29th

I dont have time to make a GoFund Me but ill literally update my post  when im home safe.

My paypal is @SuperSEmpress

Venmo @Carlie-Cannone

Thank you so much for listening in my time of need. I love yall.

~ Empress

[katsukiibby]

Argument after Argument

warnings - angst with happy ending, unprotected sex, breeding, shower sex, established relationship

another stupid argument, over what ? forgetting to pick up grocery. if it weren’t for the highschool reunion the two of you were attending tonight, you’d be at home sleeping at a distance from each other in your shared king sized bed.

at first, tsukishima didn’t even want to be in the same room as you. it took a lot of convincing but he eventually agreed just to shut you up.

he looked nice, really really nice. you couldn’t help but think he did this on purpose. he would usually never dress this nice for a silly gathering. then again, you gave him the same treatment. you dressed your absolute best, not even caring if you where over dressed.

you were expecting more of an reaction. he barley glanced at you and gave you a simple ‘you look nice’. when he saw the way you scoffed and huffed out your nose when you saw him, he was satisfied. all he wanted was an reaction.

“are you ready yet ?” he rushed you. you simply rolled your eyes and walked out the door.

you hated when it got like this. both of you had too much pride to admit that the other is right or to apologize.

you waited for him to open the car door like he always does. he doesn’t seem like the type but after 4 years together, you’ve realized he does small romantic acts instead of verbal romance. the little things he did made you so happy, it put a soft smile on your face thinking about it.

that was all washed away when he walked up to the car and got into the driver’s seat, leaving you standing outside of the car. “are you getting in or what ?” he spat. his tone was so harsh.

the drive was silent. thick tension sat in the air. you were turned towards the window and he was focused on the road. you thanked god when you pulled up to the school. you’re hoping you can loosen up tonight.

you both walked in and were instantly met by old friends. from what you heard, your old bestfriend, shoyo hinata became a volleyball player for a pro team. you were extremely devastated that you didn’t keep in touch but nows the chance to reconnect.

just as you were serving yourself a drink you hear a familiar voice. “hi ______ !”

it’s was tadashi. you never really talked to him at school, in fact you recall properly meeting him a bit after you and tsukishima got together back in college. “hey tadashi, it’s good to see you !” you brought him into a hug. “u-uh you too !” he replied with a small blush on his face. “kei should be around here somewhere.” you told him. he nodded and walked off, telling you to enjoy yourself and blah blah blah.

about 4 cups of rum punch later, you were having the time of your life. shoyo showed up an hour ago so the two of you were catching up. (well it was mostly you rambling about your day to day life while you were pretty drunk.)

you hadn’t seen tsukishima this whole time, and honestly you didn’t mind, you needed a break from him. the gathering was coming to an end and you were far from sober. you knew how to handle yourself, so it wasn’t like you were embarrassing yourself or anything, but you definitely needed help from shoyo with walking.

“let’s go find tsukishima and get you home.” he said as he put your arm around his shoulder to help you balance. “just use my phone and call him.” you slurred out.

he got your phone and attempted to open it with your old password from your first year of high school. a small smile appeared on his face when it worked.

he went to contacts and searched for tsukishima. he called him and handed you the phone.

“______ where are you ? it’s time to go.”

“hey kei, im outside the cafeteria.”

“ok im coming.” he scoffed

“thank yo-” he hung up before you could finish. you started frowning and shoyo noticed.

“everything will be fine ______” he said rubbing your back. you didn’t want to cry. you didn’t want to waste your tears on a petty disagreement. you got up and hugged shoyo, thanking him.

right on cue, tsukishima pulled up just in time to see you hugging hinata. he honked and told you to get in the car. you said your goodbyes to shoyo and got in the car. once again, awkward silence.

“so did you have a good time ?” you tried to break the tension. “it was fine. and you ? seems like you had your fair share of fun” he responded in a judging tone.

“yeah i did. it was nice to reconnect.” you said, trying to not have a snarky response. “seems like you did more than reconnect.” he said lowly. you looked at him confused “what do you mean by that.”

“well you were practically throwing yourself at hinata.” he said with a scoff.

your eyes widened in disbelief. did he just accuse you of ‘throwing yourself’ at your best friend.

“how was i “throwing myself at him” ?! we were literally just talking the whole time !”

“i saw how you were touching him, hugging him, laughing at everything he said. surely he wasn’t that funny.” he chuckled, keeping his eyes on the road.

“are you that fucking insecure ? god, i wasn’t touching him in any way and i was hugging him because he felt bad for me. the way you were talking to me was so fucking harsh.” your voice began to shake, not from sadness but anger.

“all i said was that i was coming to pick you up. how’s that harsh ?” he raised his voice.

“you hung up before i could even get two fucking words out.” you yelled.

“it’s not that big of a deal.” he rolled his eyes

“yeah but this isn’t the first time you’ve done this.”

“you’re always so mad for no reason.” he responded

you didn’t say anything after that. you both just sat in silence until you arrived home.

after arriving home, you both went up to your room. it was completely silent and the air was full of anger and tension.

you got in the shower, you had to cool off. argument after argument. you were afraid for what was next. tears started to well up in your eyes and next thing you knew they were falling.

he could here your soft sobs over the shower water falling. he didn’t mean to react that way. he was just so angry. he was angry at himself for letting this get so big. he was angry because you could leave him at any moment.

it startled you when he walked into the bathroom. “are you ok ?” he asked softly. it was silent for only a second until you replied with mhm.

“i-i’m sorry.” he said lowly. that was something he very rarely says so you were pretty speechless.

it took a few seconds for you to respond “i’m sorry too.” with a small voice.

“i just don’t want to lose you.” he continued with a shaky voice. “you’re not gonna lose me kei, we just need to.. work things out.” you replied. you heard a soft ok before the door opened.

“wait..” you said loud enough for him to hear. “can you come in here.. with me ?” you asked nervously.

“are you sure ?” he confirmed carefully. an ‘mhm’ can be heard over the noise from the shower.

he slowly undressed, already somewhat turned on from your request. you two haven’t been intimate in weeks due to the arguing. a few kisses here and there but nothing more. just being able to see your body again was making him excited.

he peeled the shower curtains back an stepped in, already admiring your body. you on the other hand took no time to begin to pull him to your height to kiss him. passionate and hungry for more. he tasted so sweet. his lips felt so soft, and his tongue was so warm as he slowly slipped it in your mouth.

he walked forward until your back hit the wall. he was holding your cheek so softly, kissing you so softly, as if. he was afraid he’d break you. he never wants to hurt you the way he did tonight. he wants to be more careful with what he says and does.

he began to trail kisses down your neck. he was teasing you. he knew the exact spot you loved oh-so much, but he’s going anywhere but there.

as soon as he made contact with the skin in between your ear and collarbone, you whimpered. oh god, he missed the way you’d whimper for him. he missed how your body aches for him in the most obvious ways.

you trace your hand down his chest, to his stomach, to his dick and you began to jerk him off. oh how he loved when you’d jerk him off. when you two first got together he refused to jerk himself off because “you do it better”.

he groaned against your neck. you loved that sound. the sound of him struggling to catch his breath, all because of you.

“sh-shit i’m about to cum.” he said slack jawed. “go ahead.” you breathed out.

after a few more pumps, he moaned out loud, releasing his cum for you and only you.

he caught his breath for a second and began to kiss you briefly before turning you around so that the front of your body is pressed against the wall.

he aligned his cock to your pussy, that was already dripping wet. he slowly entered, causing you to let out a dragged moan. he went painfully slow “please kei, f-faster” you whined.

he obeyed as he picked up the pace. his mouth was to your ear, so just hearing his moans were pushing you over.

he slid in and out quickly, causing you to struggle to stand. he took notice and held you up by wrapping his arm around your waist.

a line of swears were heard along with water hitting the two of you and skin slapping.

“i love you, kei. i love you. i love you.” you repeated as you felt yourself reaching your high. that absolutely pushed tsukishima over. he moaned loudly in you ear as his pace slowed down.

he milked his cock in you, and you took all of it happily. “i love you too, _____” he replied out of breath.

“let’s finish the shower.” you said with a weary smile.

[katsumiiii]

When they’re mad at you

Katsuki Bakugou x gn! poc reader

Eijirou Kirishima x gn! poc reader

Denki Kaminari x gn! poc reader

Katsuki Bakugou

katsuki and mad go hand in hand

whenever you see his ass he’s always mad about something

and if he’s not...

well either you’re dreaming or he’s sleep

either way he’d probably still be mad tbh

but let’s say you got him actually upset

like ACTUALLY pissed

whew chile I pray for everyone in that room

so you and katsuki were in the common room arguing

both of y’all are throwing jabs below the belt bc you guys are petty af

“you think you can be a hero with that shitty attitude?”

“at least I have a strong fucking quirk, I don’t even know how your ass got in this school. fucking extra.”

anyways, you’re not showing it but katsuki is low key hurting your feelings

ofc you aren’t gonna let him know that

soooo you say something slightly outta pocket

“right so my quirk is ass, but aren’t you the one who got kidnapped....twice? oh alright.”

the look in his eyes is heartbreaking

and although he tries to hide it, it’s pretty obvious that you hurt him

“you know what, fuck off. if you come anywhere near me ill fucking kill you.”

and he stomps off

now everyone’s looking at you like you fucked up

“oh so he can be an asshole to me, but when im one back it’s an issue?? you know what mind y’all fucking business.”

now you’re even more upset bc everyone was taking his side

you hide out in your room for a while, thinking about everything

you then realize that what you said was triffling

“damnit!”

you try everything to get him to talk to you again

but he won’t even acknowledge your  existence

everytime you try to go up and talk to him he acts like you’re not even there

“katsuki listen, can I-”

“shitty hair, come one let’s go fucking work out or some shit.”

okaayyyy guess you have to try again

“babe I know you’re pissed but-”

“DEKU!! BRING YOUR ASS OVER HERE!”

oh, so he’d rather talk to Izuku

the disrespect

but you know you fucked up so you don’t stop trying

and eventually get him to talk to you again

“katsuki please, just fucking talk to me.”

“the fuck do you want?”

you’re elated, I mean he’s never fully ignored you before

plus you miss the cuddles, and food

especially the food

“im sorry babe, I was pissed at the stuff you were saying and I wanted to hit you where it hurt. I made you some hot ramen to let you know I’m really sorry.”

he looked you up and down, his face in that same goofy ass sneer

“tch, fine I forgive you or whatever. but im not eating this shit. it doesn’t even look edible.”

“are you crazy?! the packets are good as fuck babe.”

“YOU BOUGHT ME THE SHITTY PACKET?!”

Eijirou Kirishima

what the fuck did you do to possibly make this boy mad?

I mean seriously

you really had to fuck up in order for him to even be remotely pissed

I don’t wanna talk about it

but we gon talk about it OKAY

so you was in the kitchen searching for something to drink

at the top of the fridge, you see a bottle of cranberry juice right next to kirishima’s premium crimson riot protein powder

so being the smart bitch you are, you decide to climb up on top of the counter top to get your cranberry juice

“fuck why is it up so high?”

you stick your tongue out in concentration trying to get your juice

and finally you grab it

while also knocking over kirishima’s premium crimson riot protein powder

“oh shit.”

“Y/N?! ARE YOU OKAY? WHAT WAS THAT NOISE?!”

your baby walking in with his hair down looking all confused

he then looks down at the floor, noticing the powder pooling into the cracks of the tile

he looks at you

you look at him

he looks back down at the floor

then right back at you

“heyyyyy babyyyy.”

“what the fuck?”

he bites his lip in agitation, trying not to yell

“I spent hours in line for that babe.”

“I know....sorry?”

he literally could not look at you, so he turned around and left

“fuck! great job Y/N.....least I got my cranberry juice.”

the next couple of days he was visibly different

unresponsive, not as smiley

“he’s really mad at me over some stupid protein powder....”

bakugou would not stop staring you down

mentally telling you to fix this shit or he would skin you alive

yeah not gonna happen

so you trot your ass to the store

sighing at the long ass line in front of you

“fucking god.”

eventually you manage to get the powder, placing it in his room for when he gets back from training

the next day kirishima runs over to you, kissing you repeatedly on the face

“THANK YOU BABE!! IT WAS MANLY OF YOU TO FIX YOUR MISTAKE!”

“you’re welcome baby.”

“but how’d you manage to get 6 bottles?”

“I had to fight a couple bitches.”

Denki Kaminari

yeah he literally cannot stay mad at you

like at all

and there’s no POSSIBLE way you could even REMOTELY make him angry at you for a long period of time

he’s not petty like bakugou

he’d be mad for like 1 hour and then come back asking for cuddles

what he’s mad over is probably dumb af anyways

okay so you and denki were hanging out in his room

watching reality tv

bc that’s how y’all bond

and during the show the two main girls were arguing over some dumb shit that ppl on reality tv always do

and denki ofc wants to say his little two cents

“no way, she’s totally wrong for that. don’t you think babe?”

“no, I would’ve done the same shit.”

he’s very much betrayed

looks at you like you’re crazy

slowly gets up from the bed

inching closer and closer towards the door

“are you actually upset? you asked for my opinion.”

“yeah but you were supposed to agree with me!”

you roll your eyes bc atp you’re not even taking him seriously

“Y/NNN, im really mad at youuu.”

“yeah ok.”

“FINE THEN! DON’T TALK TO ME!”

“okay.”

he stomps away, his lips curled into a pout

meanwhile you continue to watch your show

he looks back every once in a while to see if you were coming after him

“IM LEAVING FOR REAL NOW!”

“okay.”

“GOING INTO THE ELEVATOR!!”

“yep.”

“NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN!!”

“cool.”

he’s definitely like 10 feet away from your door

you gave him about 30 minutes, deciding that you were sick of reality tv, switching over to a scary movie instead

you see denki’s head peep over the doorframe

“is that the conjuring?”

“yes.”

“mhm I guess I’m not mad at you anymore.”

“what an honor.”

taglist: @mypimpademia @blackweebtrash @xetou @sisifromthed @her-majesty-kiara @moxie-elle @angiebug101 @myhoodacademia @notfiveweenieskids @lilsparkyswife

—please let me know if I missed anyone, and if you would like to be added to the taglist just shoot me a message!

[jolapeno]

Stood Up + Salads

Diego Hargreeves x Fem!Reader Words: 1.5k AN: Set with a S1 Diego but not S1 or S2 storyline. For a friend, you know who you are.

He didn’t need to look up when the door goes, he knows it’s you. Because when it rains, it pours.

Diego wonders if he should be more upset about his father, rather than being upset he’s had to see the others. Only for him to take his frustration out on you, consciously or not.

The fact you allow the door to meet the frame with such a loud thud is enough of a signal to him that you’re pissed.

Diego takes a second, thinking of his next steps as he swipes his tongue over his teeth, staring at the punching bag, as if it’s going to provide any answers on what he should do. How he could get out of this. Because if he plays this wrong, which he will, it’s going to spiral. Becoming so much worse than it already is.

A whole lot fucking worse.

And it’s already bad.

Hitting the bag once, twice and then thrice, he pays attention to your footsteps nearing. Not turning, not needing to see if your arms are folded, lips pursed and giving him one of you signature dead expressions. He knows you will be, because Diego fucking knows you and you know him.

And he hates it.

He despises that you know about his tick. About his family. About his upbringing, talent and everything else in between. He hates that you suggested calling off the meal before he did, and he hates himself for agreeing to go even if he knew he wouldn’t attend.

Because he’s decided he hates being happy.

He likes being miserable, likes fighting petty crime without anyone to come home to.

“Asshole.”

Rolling his head, he casts his eyes over you. Finding you exactly as he’s imagined. The only—slight—difference is the look in your eyes.

Sadness. A look which doesn’t suit you. One which stands out to him, because he’s seen it so rarely.

It swirls in your eyes, mixing with your usual shade, darkening them as they pin him to his spot. Or try to.

Letting his hands fall to his sides, he lets out a sigh before he can help himself. And the glare you send him is enough to force him to turn to face you.

When it comes to you, he isn’t sure if he hates how close you are to him physically or metaphorically; not sure if he dislikes it more that he wants to kiss you or let you love him.

“Hello to you too.”

Your lips twitch into a smirk. “You don’t deserve a hello.”

“Touché.”

“Surprised you know that word.”

“Under all this, I’m clever y’know?”

“Are you?” you snap, and you roll your lips together.

Those painted plump lips that’s kissed every inch of him. That he’s woke up dreaming about and gone to sleep pressed against.

“You’re angry—“

“Oh, I’m past angry, Hargreeves,” you says, tapping your foot on the gym floor. “I was angry when I was on my second glass, wondering where you were. I was fuming when I left, embarrassed and ready to hunt you down. Now, now I’m almost murderous.”

He hasn’t been called his surname in sometime. Hasn’t found himself in hot waters, with you at least, in sometime. Even angry, he feels your eyes rake down his frame, following a bead of sweat which falls from his neck down his chest and stomach.

Pulling the gloves undone with his teeth, snaps your eyes back up. And he finds himself smirking at you and his own foolishness simultaneously.

Because deep down he’s known this day would come, where you—like most—tired of him. Finding yourself irritated with his ways, of his selfishness and his impulsiveness.

“Let me have it then.”

He throws the gloves to the floor, shifting his weight as he notices the slight narrowing of your eyes. The way your lips twitch, whether a smirk or a smile, he can’t be sure. Usually, there’s less talking when you’re like this; usually you’re already pinned under him or against something. Now, you don’t even look at him like you’d welcome that.

Diego hates you for that too.

Despises that you have gotten under his skin, throwing him off his game. He’s dated. Well, since Patch they’ve not been constant. Real or permanent.

But you, you got to him. He still doesn’t even know how.

You don’t bend as easily, don’t surrender as you should. You fight him, sometimes tooth and fucking nail, and fuck, he doesn’t hate that about you. He loves that. He loves it when you steal the wind from his sail; when you cut him down. You don’t pander to him, you call him out, and he needs that even if he can’t admit it.

He even doesn’t mind that you sooth the insecurity, recognising when enough is enough. Halting anything before it goes too far, leaves too many wounds. You make him want to try to be a little better, even if he fails most days.

“No.”

“No?”

You snort. “No. Because if I rip you a new one, you’ll find some way to say sorry. And, then you’ll kiss me, and I’ll melt, and then you will forget that you’re an asshole.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever forget that.”

Your jaw tenses, almost impossibly so. “For someone in your position, you have a lot of snark.”

“Be careful, you may hurt my feelings.”

Nodding, your lips twist before straightening to an unreadable expression again. “Oh, don’t worry. I’m done.”

His muscles relax.

And his heart stops.

Yet Diego is somehow, not as surprised as he should have been.

Even if he looks at you, staring at your eyes and hoping to see a tease, a jest. He looks hoping you will change your mind, that he hasn’t successfully pushed another person away.

“Took you long en—“

“Im done talking,” you continue, cutting him off. Taking closer steps, slow ones, full of purpose as you dig your eyes into him. “I’m not gonna ask you to do right by me, I’m not gonna ask for an explanation why you decided to stand me up tonight. Hey, you don’t even have to talk to me.”

His forehead creases, flicking his eyes from your eyes to your mouth.

“Because I know why. You want me without the commitment, without the expectations of being a good person. You want a hole to fuck, so here I am, Hargreeves. You’ve got one.”

Fuck.

He stifles a sigh, especially as your finger press into his chest, nail digging down into the skin as you roll your lips and then he has to focus on not groaning. Especially when you bat your eyes lashes and smirk so condescendingly he wonders if you’ve been sent to test him.

“You want to pretend you don’t crave normal, that you don’t deserve it,” you continue, looking up at him, “I’ll play pretend. Hey, I’ll become the best damn actor in your movie you’ll ever know. But, I’m done talking.”

You place your other hand on his, moving his to your hip as you smirk.

“So, lights camera action, baby. Where do you wanna fuck me first?”

He feels your lips ghost over his. His hand clenching around your hip. Everything inside of him telling to just go with it, to not talk, to not burst open in front of you.

To kiss you.

To throw you down on the mats and not talk for hours.

“I-I’m s-sorry.”

“No. No you’re not,” you says, full of sadness, your expression not changing to match your tone. “If you were, you’d have come to dinner. You’d have stabbed your fork into the salad before I’d have told you I want street food.”

You didn’t move, and neither does he. Your hand spreading over his chest, his hand still on your hip.

“You don’t let yourself enjoy anything, because what? Your dad was an asshole and your brother went to the moon?” You ask, head tilted. “Diego, I don’t give a shit if you’re number two, you’re number one for me. But you have to try. You have to try at least ten percent otherwise it’s just me, forcing you to be with me.”

He never feels forced. Not with you.

You’re sometimes the only thing which is good. Which isn’t fucked, tainted or ruined. You’re good, if not a bit too sweary and a bit too good at drinking. But, you’re… nice, and unwilling to let him settle.

“You’re m-my number o-one too.”

“Cool.”

“I mean i-it.”

“Nice.”

“Baby, c'mon?”

You sigh. “What, Diego?”

Diego. He’s Diego again.

He doesn’t smile, even if he wants too.

He doesn’t kiss you, even if he’s fighting every part of himself.

He just stares, using his other hand to cup your cheek. “I am sorry.”

“Salad at a fancy place too good for you?”

He smirked. “Yeah, kinda.”

“Good. Because it’s too fancy for me too.”

“So why we’re we even fucking going, baby?”

“Because,” you say, defiance in your tone, “it’s what normal people do. They don’t meet over a bad game of darts and several beers, and fuck on a boxing ring. They don’t fight a literal mugger with trained assassin-level knife skills a month after beginning to sleep together.”

Your shoulders sink, your expression softening. “They date, at restaurants who charge too much and hold hands across parks. And for a second, one tiny fucking moment, I wanted that for you. I wanted normal, meet-cute type romance before we grabbed whatever was in a cart and we fucked on my new sideboard.”

His thumb brushed over your cheek. “I’d have liked that.”

“You’d have loved that. But—“

“I’m sorry,” he says again, softer, more meaningful, “I’m s-s-sorry. I really am.”

“I’m still mad.”

“That’s okay.”

“You owe me a fancy salad.”

Smirking, he nods. “Baby, I’ll give you a salad bar if you want it.”

“I don’t like salad.”

“No?”

“No.”

Smirking, he cups your cheek with more purpose. “What do you want then, baby?”

He watches your eyes darken. "Oh."

"Oh, indeed. You have a lot of making up to do.”

[soup-du-silence]

Thoughts on the whole FOWL arc, particularly Bradford’s arc and his beef with Scrooge? I felt it wasn’t handled great at all, and I think I sympathized a bit more with Bradford than the writers had intended? I dunno, I just wanted Scrooge to be a bit in the wrong for ONCE and suffer real consequences. Never really bought or understood the show’s idea of family or adventure either, especially the VERY extended family they tried to make in Season 3.

i feel like pcs would have a good answer to this actually but Im personally really fuzzy on the whole bradford thing because ive only seen most of season 3 once and didnt enjoy a lot of it so Im....hm. bradford hates....the nebulous idea of adventure because its inconvenient and expensive? and also personally traumatic? am i understanding that correctly?

and for a while i remember thinking....is bradford going to be a vehicle for exploring why scrooge’s reckless, selfish behavior is terrible for everyone else in the world, why hoarding wealth is wrong, why looting other civilizations is wrong, is there going to be a big heel turn, and we’ll have to reconcile with how watching the show from his point of view has blinded us to the harm he’s causing, and why people like musk and bezos are actual real life villains, and is bradford actually going to be a guy you root for, like poison ivy, wouldnt that be SICK??? wouldnt that be smart and brave and interesting???

and then it not only did none of that, but it leaned extra hard into the nepotism angle, without a hint of irony, and im still totally baffled by it

the bradford thing ended up just being...petty and stupid. like if someone was tasked with writing poison ivy and was like “okay but we cant let her be too relatable, she’s right you know, and people know it, so instead of being an eco terrorist trying to reclaim mother earth from capitalist pigs at any cost, she’s just really mad cus someone overwatered her succulents when she went on vacation as a kid.” You HAD something, it was right there, and you had to dial it back because mickey’s signing your paychecks.

i so, so badly wanted scrooge to be WRONG. he IS wrong. He’s ALWAYS been wrong and thats very often the POINT of his character and I really expected that that would be something we could talk about at least a little in 2017-2021 but apparently not. like i HAVE to believe the crew knows, i follow a lot of them on twitter and I see how they talk about current events so I HAD hoped.

idk.

the family thing really got on my nerves after a while because it became a buzzword for, like, “we havent done a good job of selling you this idea but if we say it often enough then you have to accept it as true.” Especially in regards to webby. i think i brought it up sometime around when moonlander aired, because she kept dropping “family” in a way that didnt feel convincing to me and was really obvious every time it happened. and i had a whole long list of things that made it feel forced, starting with “scrooge literally fucking yells that she’s not family and this doesnt concern her and NEVER apologizes” and includes “wow webby says ‘my family’ about the ducks WAY MORE than anyone else says it about her” and “spending a whole season focused on della reconnecting with her biological family SPECIFICALLY, which webby is understandably and justifiably not a part of, leaving her out by necessity” and “lots of episodes about clan mcduck specifically and the power and importance of that bloodline, which is kind of icky actually, but we’ll just paint it as grand and noble and never mention non-mcducks like Quackmore or Elvira because Scrooge is literally the only one who matters.” 

and its hard to really sell Webby as part of the unit when you’re so obsessed with the bloodlines and heritage of One Man so I guess in that regard it makes sense why they did what they did. if you’re not gonna devote the time to explaining why she is good and why she matters INDEPENDANTLY of how much scrooge lore she has memorized then i guess yeah just slap some of his genes in her and make it fact because while I wanted to believe that she was part of the family, i dont feel like they ever did the hard work of convincing me she was. they just kept saying FAMILY FAMILY FAMILY until i went “god yeah shut up i get it”

like he NEVER FUCKING APOLOGIZED, guys. and she just forgives him before they ever see each other again. How fucking hard would it have been to have them sit down like “i didnt mean it, i was wrong, and if i didnt see you as my family then thats my own fault because you’ve been here under my roof your whole life and i had my head too far up my own cloaca to see what i was missing. that changes now, you’re one of us”

but that would mean admitting he was wrong. and scrooge is never wrong.