#i gotta stop writing at midnight i swear lmao

[heart-of-the-morningstar]

Corruption fic - Last preview

Ok, last preview for this fic! Again, no active warnings here but I promise the finished product will be very fun~ ;)

When you regained consciousness, you felt the familiar pounding in your head after a heavy night of drinking. Begrudgingly you dragged yourself out of you bed and forced your way to your bathroom for a much needed shower. You realized when you glanced towards the mirror that you never changed out of your clothes from yesterday. In fact, you don't even remember how you got back to your room last night, Everything was such a blur, and it hurt to think with the major headache you were experiencing at the moment. The last thing you could recall was falling off the bar stool, the pain you felt in your shoulder was enough of a reminder. Once you stepped in the hot shower, you felt a little better, but only a little bit. You tried to rack your brain for answers, trying to remember exactly what happened after you fell. You ran your fingers through your hair, letting the water soak your aching body. But in doing so, something had clicked. That motion had unlocked a foggy memory. Your hair. Someone had run their hands through your hair last night, but you couldn't for the life of you remember who. It was gentle, soft, tender. But who would do that?

After a few minutes, you stepped out of the shower and threw on one of the sundresses you had hanging in your closet. You really didn't feel like putting a ton of effort into your clothing choices today. Hopefully Charlie would forgive you for skipping out on her planned activity today and let you recover. You realized after that initially thought that you didn't even know what time is was. Chances were you had already missed it. With a groan, you plopped down back onto the mattress, your hair still damp.

"What's the matter with me," you asked yourself. "How do I expect to be redeemed when all I do is sabotage my chances by getting wasted every night?" Your headache persisted as you laid in your bed, you almost wanted to cry from the pain. But then, you heard a soft knocking at your door. Charlie, you thought. More than likely she was checking in on you to make sure you were alright. "I'll be there in a second!" you called out. The volume of your own voice didn't help your hangover in the slightest. You grabbed one of the small pillows off your bed for comfort and trudged your way to your door. "I'm really sorry I slept in Charlie," you spoke as you turned the door handle, "it was a...really rough night for me and I-" you stopped completely once you opened the door fully. Charlie, in fact, was not the one who had knocked.

"Yeah, you really did get put through the ringer last night, didn't you?" Lucifer smiled at you. The pillow you held fell to the floor with a soft thud.

“Oh, I-I’m so sorry, sir!” You stuttered. “I-I thought you were Charlie! Did-Did she send you?”

Lucifer looked at you with a puzzled stare. “Uhh, no, no she didn’t. I told her what happened last night and let her know I’d check in on you like I promised.”

“Promised?” you asked, but Lucifer didn’t seem to hear you.

“And you don’t have to refer to me as “sir,” my dear, “Lucifer” is just fine! I mean, you used my name just fine last night!”

Your heart stopped. “L-Last night? Oh no…what…what happened last night?”

Lucifer gawked at your question. “Wait, do you not remember anything?” You shook your head timidly. “Oh dear…well, nothing bad happened, I promise! What’s the last thing you can remember doing?”

You looked down at the floor sheepishly, embarrassed to admit the real answer. “The last thing I can remember is falling off the bar stool and…landing on my face…”

Lucifer stood there and pondered for a few seconds before speaking again. “Do you mind if I come in?”

“Oh, umm, yeah, y-you can come in,” you agreed. You picked up the pillow you had dropped and opened the door for Lucifer to saunter in. “I’m sorry I look like a mess right now, I-I just got out of the shower and my hair isn’t completely dry yet and-”

“Hey, hey, it’s alright!” Lucifer interrupted. “You don’t need to apologize. You look lovely, in any case.”

You brought the pillow in your hands up to your face in an attempt to hide your blush. “T-Thank you,” your muffled voice came through the pillow. "I-If you want, you can sit down on my b-ahh fuck!" One hand came up to your forehead when you felt your head pounding from the pressure that's been building since you woke up. This was definitely one of your worst hangovers to date.

"Oh! Are you alright?" Lucifer asked, his voice laced with deep concern.

"My head..." you choked out. You made your way over to your bed, crawling up to the top and cradling the pillow in your arms "Hangovers are never really kind to me."

Lucifer frowned, seating himself down on the edge of your mattress next to you. You felt your face flare up again when you looked up at his worried expression. "Can I help you? I can alleviate the pain. You only need ask."

"Y-you can?"

"Sure! Angelic power and all that." His hand hovered just above your forehead. "May I?"

"Yes," you breathed. With that, you felt his soft hand make contact with your aching head. You felt a warm tingling sensation emanating from his touch. It didn't hurt nor was it unpleasant, it was healing. Without thinking, you leaned further into his touch, letting the warmth spread throughout your entire body. Your headache slowly began to fade away along with the fogginess that had been plaguing you since you woke up. As his touch lingered, you realized you were able to think more clearly than before, memories from last night started to become clearer and clearer. You remembered Lucifer had come to your rescue after you'd fallen. You remembered Alastor had shown up to mock you in your drunken stupor, only for Lucifer to step in and defend you. You remember sobbing with Lucifer while he comforted you. Then you remembered...

You shot straight up, your heart racing a million miles a second, with Lucifer throwing his hand back in surprise. "What? What happened? Did I hurt you?" Lucifer asked in a panic.

"I'm..." you began, "I'm starting to remember things from last night." You clutched the pillow tight to your chest, refusing to look in the fallen angel's direction. "Please tell me I didn't actually lay down in your lap..."

"Uhh, well...," You could tell from his response that that's exactly what had happened.

"Oh my God, I'm so sorry!" you apologized. "I shouldn't have done that! I-I know I drank way too much last night, I should have stopped, I didn't realize that-"

Lucifer's hand immediately flew to your shoulder in an attempt to get you to stop you from completely spiraling. "Darling, you don't need to apologize for that! You weren't feeling great so you just, ya know, used me as a pillow. And besides, it's not like I disliked it either."

"W-What?!" you nearly shrieked. Another realization had hit you just then. "You! You were the one that was playing with my hair! That's the only thing I could remember when I woke up!" You buried your face in the pillow once more. "If I said anything embarrassing..."

You heard Lucifer swallow hard. "I guess uhh, it depends on your definition of the word."

"Oh God, please no..." you pleaded. "What did I say?"

Lucifer held up his hand again as an offering, a weary smile on his face. "I can help you to remember, if you wish."

[easingintostillness]

i don't always get why, but i take my epiphanies seriously. like, truly extremely seriously.

as in, if one night sudden realizations and revelations hit me hard, like "oh fuck, i fell in love!" next thing you know, i'm most definitely never coming back from that.

looking back, i think my epiphanies are the ones responsible for all the ~ends~ of my long term relationships. it's never these huge serious fights, built up resentments that exploded, or anything dramatic, it's a subtle out-of-nowhere midnight "enlightenment"—like, "holy shit, i understand everything now! this relationship has died long ago! we no longer grow with each other! we need to stop!" lmao. i don't know how to explain it, but yeah, more or less like that. it's almost like pulling the lever of a railway that redirect the trajectory of the train. one day i just feel like pulling the lever because i simply no longer see my life going to the prior direction. like, "wowie, i finally come to a realization that it is not where i see i'm going! and i know where i wanna go instead now!" i did mention i had the tendency to get stuck on something for some time, but boy, the feeling of pulling that lever, when it happens; nothing feels more powerful than that, i swear. it's almost like, let's say, you've been doing life on autopilot simply because you've grown accustomed to your routines, your comforts, and little did you realize that you've lost track of your destination. but then one night, it hits you: "bro, turns out i wanna go to Bali, i gotta jump off ship right now!" or something like that, lmao, i don't know. this is 6am, i have zero brain cell writing this. moral of the story: don't underestimate your midnight epiphanies. it leads you to somewhere better. always. those prophet stories about gaining some "wahyu" this is it guys, it's fucking real.

[fandomlit]

dare (fundy x reader)

requested by anon “Hi I love your works, may I request 54 and 69 for the prompt requests? With cc!Fundy where maybe they’re in a long distance relationship and they meet up finally (planned or one surprises the other) and just, fluff lmao i’m very soft rn”

summary fundy is very confused when you call him for a game of truth or dare. with the help of his friends, he finally gets the point: you’re at his door.

warning swearing, tooth rotting fluff

im ending my writing prompts,, feel free to rq before they’re gone

gif cred belongs to @khuantru

“things are going well with y/n then, fundy?” wilbur questioned with a grin. a group of them had been goofing off on the origin smp, most of them streaming, when the topic of you came up.

“oh, yeah,” fundy grinned, thinking of the conversation he had with you just hours before. “long distance is hard for anyone, but..” he shrugged. “she makes it easier, i think.”

“aww!” niki cooed. 

“yeah,” fundy blushed with another chuckle. “i never thought i’d ever know what it felt like to look at someone and smile for no reason.”

“aw, fundy!”

“that’s so sweet!”

fundy grinned before finally looking over at his stream. “chat- im not a simp!”

they all continued to stream as per usual, moving about the smp and joking around. they had just held an impromptu meeting in the pub when fundy’s phone began to ring.

“hold on, guys,” fundy spoke. “im getting a call.”

“you’re actually gonna take it?”

fundy raised his phone to his ear. “hi, baby.” his friends laughed. “no, im not busy.”

“what-!”

then fundy’s eyebrow furrowed, giving his camera a skeptical look. “y/n.. what?” they couldn’t hear your voice on the other line as fundy began to laugh. “im not playing truth or dare!”

as his friends began to laugh and question him, fundy put his phone on speaker, exposing your giggly voice speaking, “no, please! please, just a quick game!”

“you can’t even see me!” fundy argued with a laugh. “what-what’s the point?”

“you’d know if you’d play!”

“i want to see how this goes, i don’t know about anyone else,” ranboo spoke, and the others on the call immediately chimed in with their agreements. fundy wasn’t sure if you could hear them over his sigh.

“okay, fine,” he ceded. “i pick truth.”

“no, that’s lame!”

fundy threw his hands up while everyone continued laughing, including you. “okay dare!”

“i dare you to go to your front door right now.” fundy gave the phone another weird look.

“why would i do that?” he scoffed. “it’s nearly midnight! i could catch a cold!”

“it’s a dare, babe, you gotta do it!” you laughed.

“i don’t wanna!”

“fundy, go to your door!” wilbur nudged.

“don’t encourage this behavior!” fundy snickered over your begging.

“fundy!” niki called, surprising most with the change from her usually soft voice. “go see your partner!” fundy furrowed his brow for a moment before the pieces clicked into space. he looked to his phone in surprise.

“are you outside my house right now?”

“im so cold, please let me in,” you finally cracked with a laugh. his friends cheered and laughed as fundy finally threw off his headphones and ran out of the room.

he had never unlocked his front door and swung it open faster. his heart stopped at just the sight of you with snow speckling your h/c locks. you brushed some out of your face with a grin as fundy just stared at you in shock, his jaw dropped as he took in your winter attire.

“hi,” you giggled at him, and the lack of static accompanying your voice was what finally convinced him that this wasn’t a dream. he finally engulfed you in a tight hug.

“holy shit, you’re real,” he mumbled into your hair as your face buried into his chest. you laughed, your grip around him just as deadly.

“i am,” you assured with a hum. “i can’t believe you are, too.”

fundy finally pulled away from you, enough so that he could gaze into your excited eyes. his heart was pounding his chest just as the sight of your smile so close to him. he kept his arms securely around your waist. “this is a dream.” you laughed, and the way you threw your head back was so beautiful to him that he couldn’t help but grin, “you’re a dream.”

“im real,” you assured, shaking him as best as you could with your arms hanging around his neck. 

he just shook his head. then he licked his lips with a more mischievous thought. “.. can i test?”

fundy reveled in the way your cheeks heated, though you gave him a happy nod of confirmation. “yes, you can.” fundy’s hands slipped up to cup your face as his lips came to press against yours. the feeling was heaven; your gentle lips moving against his, so warm and soft in contrast to the cold, netherlands air around your passionate pair.

you were both grinning when you finally pulled away, foreheads resting against each other. “how long have you been planning this?” fundy asked you quietly.

“three months,” you breathed with a giggle. “it was difficult to keep a secret.”

“yeah, you suck at keeping secrets,” fundy teased and you laughed again, leaning up ever so slightly to brush your nose endearingly against his. “my stream’s probably dying to see you.”

“oh my god, you’re streaming?!”

[not-me-simping-for-blasty]

y’all i cant stop thinking about this,,, i absolutely cannot stop thinking about it

so i present y’all with sum.....

✨sleepy bakugou hcs✨

- Q U I E T boy. ik ik ur like “bakugou? quiet? in the same sentence?”,, but here’s what im here to tell u,, it’s more likely then u think. mostly bc being snarky/angry all day has to be so exhAUSTING, so when bakugou crashes he crashes

-pls he’ll go from perfectly alert, sitting up ram-rod straight on the couch next to you, to slumping into the cushions with half-lidded eyes in all of 2.5 seconds

-like, he’ll ask u about ur day, right? and as soon s u answer he’ll lean back, close his eyes and just sit there and listen quietly to you speak,, little “mhm”’s and “you fuckin’ tell ‘em”’s are the only sign he’s listening (he is listening tho. bakugou almost never forgets anything u tell him,, even when he’s half asleep)

-oh my god and u cannot tell me this man doesn’t fight sleep. he does. every time. pls n he’s just fluttering his eyes, rubbing at them and trying to stay awake so he can hear you talk. and ur always like “you know, it’s okay, you can sleep. there’s always tomorrow.” n he’s just “no. finish the fuckin’ story. ‘m listenin’.”

-pls and one of the only fandom-wide bakugou hcs i whole-heartedly agree with is that he’s a cuddler. he is. 100% a physical guy at heart but only rlly allows himself to be behind closed doors (read: when it’s bedtime)

-so when he’s tired he’s very much a clinger. arms around your waist and hands slipping under your shirt. not even in like a 🥴 way, he’s not trying to start anything, bakugou just likes skin contact. probably likes how soft ur skin is against his calloused hands

-pls n he’s so blunt. i mean, he is all the time, but especially when he’s sleepy bc all the excess bite drains out of his voice. will 100% seriously just look at you and just flatly say “No.” when u tell him you’ve gotta get up

-ur like “hey, gotta brush my teeth first. then we can fall asleep.” n bakugou is like “No.” and ur like, “no, really. i feel gross.” n he’s just like “No.”

-100% will dig his face into your neck and just kinda doze. like, won’t fall fully asleep, but he’ll fade in and out and when he occasionally mumbles u can always feel it against ur skin

-probably feels like he somehow runs even ?hotter? when he’s tired. like, he always feels warmer than the average person, but when he’s sleepy man’s is literally radiating warmth

-probably doesn’t kiss you on the lips very much,, bc he’s wants to be fully awake for that and give you the effort you deserve,, but he will kiss your palm if u cradle his face. probably turns his head to the side rlly languidly, and still somehow blushes when he presses his lips to ur hand. (soft affection just flusters him, okay, especially on the rare occasion when he’s the one giving it instead of recieving)

-sleepy!bakugou is also probably the only bakugou who will let you fuss over him. like, every other time u even try he’ll bat your hands away and shrug u off, but when he’s tired he doesn’t fight it. he’ll let you ask your questions and fuss over his wounds and kiss his bruises without complaint

-pls don’t bring it up in the morning tho. it’ll embarrass him and it’ll be a very long time before he lets u fuss over him again

-and i mean, y’all have seen the gif, bakugou is big spoon. he is. almost every single time,,, but i also think he links ur hands together while doing so. so instead of an arm over ur waist,, he’ll sit it a little higher, just below ur ribs, so that when he pulls u in he can hold ur hand that’s tucked up by ur chest

-and on like, the off chance that he’s not big spoon,, mans is just laying directly on top of you. like, head on ur chest, one leg in between yours. only very occasionally tho

-pls he probably looks at you with such unguarded affection. usually he’ll try to hide it, but if everything is calm and quiet, late at night, bakugou will let it slip. his eyes are always half-lidded as he stares at you, tracking your moments intently, blinking slowly

-oo n tell me this man doesn’t talk in his sleep. he does. full sentences with swears. it’ll be like midnight and u feel his lips against ur bare shoulder, and when u listen he’s just “fuckin- i said stop. i’ll smoke you. Fuckin’ bitch.”

-probably dreams a lot. which means he twitches and flutters his eyelashes and jerks randomly between different stages of sleep

-oh my god and bc i can’t stop myself here’s a list of actions (that u do) that i just know would put bakugou right tf to sleep

1.) playing with his hair. more specifically tho,, gently brushing the hair back from around his ears and forehead

2.) massaging his arms. u cannot tell me this man’s arms aren’t sore,, i mean,, have u seen his quirk?? the recoil/strain is severe. so when he comes home from a tough mission, where he over-exerted himself like always, bakugou’s arms are literally a coiled mess of knots. but all u gotta do is start working at them and then he is an absolute puddle under your fingers

3.) braiding your hair in front of him. i cant explain this one i just kno he’s the type to sit there and watch u do it, and he just finds the methodical aspect of it so calming and almost hypnotic to watch

4.) giving him any sort of warm drink. no, literally, he’s a simple dude. all it takes is a warm drink and somewhere soft to lay n he’s ready to pass tf out

-oh my god and hear me out, if ur a pro-hero too,, and y’all are coming back from a mission at night??? pls he’d actually be so cute for once

-i’m talking very much him nearly falling asleep in the shower and then dragging you to bed with him. and he’s falling asleep, just on the verge of it, and he’ll just “did good today, dumbass. fuckin’ killed ‘em real good. looked hot.” and then he’s dead to the world. completely unconcious

—/—

haha here’s a shameless dump of fluff bc as much as i write about him being a little asshole,, bakugou is also a sweetie. sometimes. mostly when he keeps his mouth shut

also lmao,, i’ve been cleaning out my drafts/asks today,, can u guys tell?? ahahaha soz for what probably feels like an absolute spam of content but i simply cannot stop

[miss--aura]

Saw your requests were open! I too love Fatgum so maybe an +18 plus scenario with some angst? Like maybe you were good friends but now both are stuck in limbo after sleeping with each other one night. Confused about what they are. Sorry if I'm not making sense.

Stuck In between

Pairing: Taishiro Toyomitsu x Reader

Warnings: angst, bad smut because I had a headache while writing the ending, idk what to put for warnings, banana milk sucks

Requested by: ness-is-a-vanillabean

On a serious note I decided I don't know how to wrote angst or if this counts as angst lmao.

It was a spur of the moment decision, at least that's what you kept telling yourself. You were drunk, and let your lust get the better of you and now you didn't know what to do.

You shouldn't have let Midnight convince you to go, you shouldn't have taken the wine glass offered to you. It was all just some big mistake that you made, and it landed you where you are now.

You haven't left your house in a week and you certainly havent been checking any messages on your phone. Luckily you could work from home, but you couldnt hide forever.

"God, I'm so stupid!" Slamming your head on your desk with a groan, tears forming in your eyes as you choke out a sob.

No matter how hard you tried it kept replaying in your head. The way his eyes seemed to drink you up, his hands caressing every inch of your body, the way he filled you up hitting the spots that made you forget your name.

Part of you didn't regret it at all, getting out all of the lust filled emotions was such a nice release to something you've been holding onto for god knows how long.

Yet, you couldnt look back on the memory in a fond light. Because in the end, you said I love you. You said I love you to your bestfriend, and now you couldn't even talk to him.

He'd called you at least 15 times a day since then, over 200 messages being left unread. You just had to go and be selfish, didn't you? Ruin the one good thing you had in your life.

You wondered how he was doing, not that you'd ask. But at the same time, you were his bestfriend and you confessed your love to him in a drunken haze and haven't spoken to him since.

All the ways you could've confessed, you had to go and do it when you were drunk out of your mind and being pounded into a mattress. Going back to work at the agency would be a nightmare now.

One week left until you actually had to go back to the agency. Meaning one week to figure out how to avoid Taishiro for the rest of your life. Did you want to avoid him? No, but you'd rather avoid him than own up to your own emotions.

Picking your head up off the desk you decide to actually do something productive for once. You needed groceries anyways and right now was the perfect time to do so, considering Taishiro would be patrolling the other side of town.

You quickly freshen up and head out the door, the grocery store being only a few blocks away so you could manage walking there and back.

It was a short walk, being about 15 minutes give or take a few. Now that you were scanning shelves you realized how long it had really been since you've seen, well, another human.

It almost made you laugh, how seeing really people made you feel better about the situation your in. Sucking in your cheeks you put a small case of banana milk into your cart.

Taishiro didn't really care for it, but it was almost a comfort item for you. He always said it just tasted like a banana, and it'd cost less to buy regular bananas instead. Though you'd disagree everytime he brought it up.

Sure, it tasted like bananas, but it is banana milk so whatever. Plus it came in cute boxes with a straw and who were you to deny something that looked so cute.

Making it to checkout, you place your items on the counter. Allowing the cashier to do their job while you let your eyes wander around the store.

It wasn't big, but it had a comforting feel. Maybe it was because you'd been feeling down, or maybe it was the way you'd been here so many times that the familiarity was comforting to you.

Never the less you give a small smile to the cashier, finishing the rest of your items as you pay. Fishing the bags into your arms as you start the short journey back to your home.

"Need help carrying those bags?" The voice made you freeze in place. There was no way this was happening, he wasn't supposed to be here. He was on duty, right?

"Listen we need to talk, you can't keep ignoring me."

"I don't wanna talk right now, aren't you on duty anyway? I have to go put these away." You start walking off, hurrying to get away.

"I'm a hero, I help people in need. You aren't feeling like yourself which means it's my place to help. Is it not?"

"I said I don't want to talk, I said something I didn't mean, and I have to face the consequences for that. Okay?"

"So you don't love me?" You swear you could hear the hurt in his voice, but you told yourself you were hearing things. You can't ruin this anymore than you already have.

You can't bring yourself to respond, quickening your pace as your eyes fill with tears. Trying to blink them away only causing them to slide down your face. Not that you bother to wipe them because you know Taishiro is still watching you walk away.

He doesn't like you like that, he's a pro hero, you're just an office lady. That's what you have to remember. Whatever you thought you had, was just you trying to convince yourself that something could happen.

It didn't matter if you wanted to run into his arms, nothing would change. You'd be the hopeless romantic who had feelings for a hero who didn't have time to waste on a relationship.

"Y/n wait! Stop walking so fast I can't keep up!" Taishiro's voiced filled through your ears, your heart melting at the sound. But for once, your head was in control. Head over heart, that's what your mom always said.

"Go away 'shiro." It came out more broken than you wanted it to and you knew he could see right through you as much as you wanted to hide away from your feelings your feet plant themselves no longer letting you move further.

Two arms wrapping around your waist in the tightest hug you've ever experienced. Stealing the air from your lungs as a small whine of pain escapes your lips.

"Y/n, listen to me. You can't keep avoiding me. I've been worried sick about you, can't you tell? I thought I was dreaming when you told me you loved me but just as soon as that happened you dissapeared. Please Y/n talk to me."

You shook your head more tears streaming down your cheeks as you tried to speak without sounding like you were dying. Though it felt like you were.

"You don't love me 'shiro, I gotta get over you but whenever you're near me it makes it so hard. No matter how hard I try I keep falling harder."

"Who said I don't love you? Angelcake, you never asked me if I loved you. Look at you, what is there not to love about you? When you said you loved me I'd never been more happy in my entire life. So please, stop running away from me, I hate not being with you."

"'shiro..."

"Shh, let's get you home, I wanna show you how much I love you."

Arriving at your house, you force the key into the door as quick as you can manage. Taishiro taking notice to how desperate you were to enter.

Pushing the door open you realize how messy your house was, an awkward smile spreading across your face as you let him in. "Please excuse the mess, it's not usually like this I've just been having a hard time recently."

"As if it's any worse than mine, besides I'm not here to judge you." He grins placing his hand in yours and leading you to your bedroom. Seeing as he'd been here enough to know the lay out of your house.

Just as soon as you were in your room, he was all over you. Kissing you with so much passion you thought you were dreaming by the way he seemed to be bleeding out lust.

Taishiro opted to use his normal form in moments like this, his fat body not working when it came to the more intimate moments. Not that you loved him any less in any form.

You whine into the kiss, your body on fire from the arousal building up within you. Clawing at your close to get them off, desperate to have Taishiro's hands be on your bare skin.

"Someones needy, aren't they?"

"'shiro, please I want you. I've been waiting for this."

He hums, giving you a small nod as his hands sneak up your shirt. Helping you strip out of your clothes before falling suite with his own.

His hands grope your breasts squeezing lightly to get a reaction out of you. Which you give through a small moan. The noise is just enough to get him going though.

Spreading your legs and holding them open with his knees he slides his fingers over your folds, getting a grasp for how wet you were for him.

The more he teased the more you squirmed under him, small begs passing through your lips. Begging for him to hurry up.

"Taishiro, please stop teasing me I cant wait anymore~"

He only smiles in response, placing his cock at your entrance. Having done this just a week ago he was more than ready to plunge into the depth. Slowly thrusting into you allowing you to adjust.

You whine out his name, back slightly arching off the bed in ecstasy. Clenching around him your eyes clouded with list at the sensual yet familiar feeling of him filling you up.

He thrusts harder, finding a sweet rhythmatic pace that made the both of you feel good. Not too fast, but not too slow either. The perfect momentum between the two of you.

Leaning down to kiss you, he finds himself smiling like a little kid, happier than ever to be with you in this moment.

"'m close baby, where do you want my cum?"

"Anywhere, I dont care."

Satisfied with that response he thrusts into you a few more times before pulling out and letting his cum cover your lower abdomen.

"I told you I loved you babe, is that enough to prove it?"

"More than I could have ever asked for."

[jujutsu-headcanons]

Yes to Yuji wrecking Mahito! Just so much yes my boy needs to avenge those wrongfully killed!

See I wanted Geto to be on my shit list (as I'm not normally a bad guy lover) but I swear he wore me down reading the manga. Plus he's just so pretty he makes my brain all static noises 😳 Not to mention that backstory between him and Gojo like YES give me all the drama I need buried drama 🤩

Totally agree on the Mai thing. See I wanted to hate Todo too bc of well him beating on Megumi but the moment him and Yuji were just like "Big Dumb Meat Heads" together I threw that out the window! Those two together are *chefs kiss* Absolutely stupendous I never get tired of them 👌👌👌

Mai on the other hand is just crawling more and more under my skin. Like why you gotta be like that gurl? You wanna go in the crusty corner with Mahito? Cuz you gotta crusty attitude that needs fixing like yesterday 😐

Literary brain tells me it wants more drama/character growth between Megumi and Toji. But my useless overly big heart wants to punch Toji and protect Megumi at all costs bc he just showed up on the screen like the kool aid man and burst right into my heart and I shan't forgive Megumi for that but now I will die for him so ¯\_( ツ)_/¯

But I'm not the only one who lowkey fantasizes about self inserty type day dreams??? Like every day all day I got my thoughts flowing into 500 different lil oneshots I'm too chicken to post anywhere bc I havent written anything in a while and I feel I'm rusty. But your idea! YOUR IDEA WOO BOI- I'm not even a Gojo fanatic (like I adore him but my heart dick thudded elsewhere RIP) but that scene you described of straddling him just to rip his blindfold off in the heat of an arguement that's clearly deadly to either party- Just to see him on the brink of tears fighting back every emotion to slate his composure to cocky/uncaring. Only to have it obviously failing, and the metaphorical reality around you both crumbling along with Gojo's emotional state- Oh God I would read that crap outta something like that. It fills me with the angst and I thrive on it daily *heavy breathing* You should think about posting more of your original content too! Self inserty or not bc that sounds down right brilliant on so many levels

💛anon

Bro I can't help but feel had for Gojo. That shit must have hurted. Like he looked so calm and collected when it all happened but was he really? His best friend potential lover went feral and murdered an entire village AND his family then he tried to kill his first years once and now AGAIN what is happening. Did you see the look on Gojo's face when Yaga told him he went rogue? That was a face of hurt and betrayal he couldn't even begin to understand at the young age of... What was it, 17? 18? He was practically a little itty bitty baby compared to now. I haven't read the prequel yet don't laugh at me but I've heard it hurts so much worse having to face Getou back then AND now. Stupid brain worms, stop fucking around.

I wanted to hate Todo too hut before he even turned good I couldn't. I have a thing for big buff boys who have zero brains and too much brawns I'm looking at you Metal Bat, Captain Ōbi I just wanna adopt/marry them because in all reality they're trying their best. I'm really glad Todo exists and has his big brother delusion because honestly I think that's something Yuji needs, especially in the current arc. Yuji needs as much support as he can get.

PFFFT CRUST CORNER I cannot with you omg they do need to sit on the time out chair for s bit and think about what they've done lmaooo

DID YOU CALL TOJI ZENIN- FUSHIGURO THE FUCKING KOOL AID MAN AHAHAHHHSH oh my god i hate this so fucking much or were you calling Megumi the koolaid man bc really each one is absurd n e wayz I dunno bro I rlly can't wait until Megs wakes up post Shibuya arc and actually has time to process what the fuck happened to him back then. I really want to know if he can connect the dots by himself and realize holy shit that was the source of my daddy issues right there in the flesh and how he reacts to him being a curse and all that. There's so many ways that can go too it's scary to think about.

Low key unrelated but I have a theory that Gojo can see everything from his little cube prison and knows what's going on. Its probably because of the six eyes, or because he's just fucking Gojo, or even because Geto seems kinda sadistic and would do something like that. But I can imagine him watching Megs and Toji fight and it absolutely destroying him. For starters, Gojo killed him .... Right? Wtf is he doing back? What? Second don't commit suicide in front of your kid oh my god Toji what (I'm probably just salty because of a past experience, but also, calm down Toji oh my god) and third I can see it hurting Gojo because in a way it feels like he's been trying to protect Megumi. Its obvious Gojo has this attachment to Megumi, and maybe it's because they've known each other so long, but I don't think Gojo is prepared to deal with the aftermath. Does he have to tell him, if Megs doesn't put the pieces together? Will he have to knock some sense into him to actually tell him? Because he DID try to tell Megs once before and he avoided it like the plague. Its also gotta hurt when you feel like someone's dad and you witness them have a bad interaction with their other dad.

Throw in his daughter being on the brink of death, his other son being emotionally demolished, his second year kids lost in the void and not even his void, his best friend locked him in a box, his other best friend exploded, etc. I think Gojo I pretty distraught even if he doesn't show it

Bro okay my brain is riddled with ideas like this and 90% of them are always angst. Idk where tf they come from half the time but they exist and I hate it. They're always self inserts too.

So I actually read this ask last night, but due to personal reasons I didn't reply to it now, and I actually started experimenting writing out this scenario. I had to stop when I wrote the line "Approximately one year after the first finger was consumed, Itadori Yūji was formally executed. At three minutes to midnight, Sukuna Ryomen was expelled from his body, destroying the vessel along with it. The executioner was none other than the teenager's teacher and mentor Gojo Satoru. When Y/N awoke to this news, they attacked on sight."

Oh god I made myself so sad with that line

And i do really want to post some of my fics, like I did with Nobara Meeting Sukuna For The First Time. However, I only posted that because it was short and simple lmao it was basically just a meme I didn't even run it though grammarly like I do with the headcanons.

I like sticking to the headcanons as of right now because I feel like grammar didn't exist when I make those. I can spell things wrong and leave off punctuation and word then like I'm a third grader just learning English and no one will laugh lmao. Fanfics kinda stress me out because i want them to be perfect. I also have a hard time with fight scenes and transitioning and it's s mess.

I REALLY want to write out my Guardian Angel! Junpei AU because I think it's so cute. Just the idea that this boy is assigned to fight against fate and the higher ups and keep Yuji alive despite him being an idiot and a target is cute to me. Like I just canon him being the plantonic equivalent of in love with this boy and he feels like he rlly owes it to Yuji for trying to save him it's the LEAST he can do. Plus I need the mental imagine if Junpei annoying reader-chan into finding Yuji because "they play a pivotal role in Yuji's future" just for the "pivotal role" to literally be playing therapist and just being there for him and being a medium between Junpei and Yuji because guardian angels aren't allowed to reveal themselves to the person they're guarding but also/// he might risk his wings being stripped just to talk to Yuji one more time////

Okay I'm going to stop now

But yea, maybe if I have time and create little mini works like Nobara Meeting Sukuna For the First Time I'll def post them! I'll work on casually making them longer and soon I'll be confident to posts longer ones. But until then I hope just the headcanons at alright ;-;

[rynhaswritersblock]

gross (hc) | p.p.

summary: chaotic mess in which you pull a Dumb Bitch Move and write a song for peter while relying on the hope that he never sees it

warnings: i've already cussed. that speaks for itself ALSO FLUFF THIS IS VERY CUTE IM PROUD OF IT

+ + +

- HEADCANON TIMEEEEEEEEEEEE

- yeahyeah!!

- you guys i cannot stop saying "yeahyeah" i do not know why i just... it's a part of me now

- i think i got it from bigballerclaire on tiktok LMAO

- ANYWAYS

- BY THE WAY THIS IMAGINE IS KINDA A REVERSE ONE OF "camera"

- speaking of, why the Fuck did i call that one "camera". that's the most boring name??? did i forget to change it before publishing????? i need to go change that name (so if you can't find an imagine called camera by the time you're reading this IT'S BECAUSE I CHANGED THE NAME LMAO)

- OKAY! LETSGETIT

- so it's late at night

- like midnight or something

- and ur in ur FEELS okay?

- (we all know that feeling when you've been reading fanfic for like hours and then it's one am and you finally look away from your screen and stare at the ceiling and you're like. holy fuck. and then your brain drifts and ur like I WANT PETER RN!!!!!!!!!)

- yeah that type of FEELS

- and guess who's a musical genius in this imagine?

- bitch it ain't me!

- it's YOU!

- YEAHYEAH!

- so you're like a hella songwriter

- think joshua bassett and olivia rodrigo on instagram iykyk

- keep an eye out (for selener.. jkjk) for olivia's song later in this imagine

- so OBVIOUSLY you're like::

- i need to get out my feelings

- i like writing songs

- ... 0_0

- To The Journal!

- so basically YOU WRITE A SONG

- ABOUT PETER

- BECAUSE HE'S YOUR BEST FRIEND AND YOU'RE IN LOVE WITH HIM AND CAN'T HANDLE ALL THE PENT UP EMOTION YOU'RE FEELING

- YEAH

- okay so i am stealing this song from olivia rodrigo because it deadass fits PERFECTLY

- this song goes SO HARD

- pro tip if you play guitar/uke the chords are on ultimate guitar it's VERY FUN TO PLAY

- anyways i most DEFINITELY recommend listening to this song while reading this because like...

- ??????????????

- yeah you get it

- i'm putting the lyrics in because i Feel Like It and it Adds To the Imagine

- i don't think i'm capable of writing a sentence without randomly capitalizing shit good god

- so HERE ARE THE LYRICS

Not long ago when I saw you there With your brown eyed grin and your messy hair And every girl at the party was looking at you I wonder what I'd say if I knew back then That the brown eyed boy'd be my best friend And the one I'd give my heart to (ooh, ooh, ooh) Now everything reminds me of you Your pictures framed all over my room And if I hate someone you'll hate them too As long as I'm your darling angel I don't need anything in the world 'Cause I feel like the luckiest every second that I'm your girl I wanna do everything with you Take the highs, I'll take the lows I'll keep you close Give you the most, oh baby I like you so much it's kinda gross Yeah, I like you so much it's kinda gross

- thank u genius.com da Real Plug

- so YEAH

- you've got those lyrics scribbled in ur notebook

- WHICH BTW

- this is one of those shitty cliches where she WritesSongs! and carries her journal with her everywhere because it's Special!

- and ur stupid cause ur like "im just writing this for myself! to get out my feelings! he will Never see this Haha!"

...

- so obviously

- you can see where this is going

- some SHIT about to go down

- you and peter are at the library doing homework because yeah(yeah)

- and you finish all your work so you just decide to get out your journal and start doodling bc.. like fuck it why not

- and then peter's stomach growls

- this bitch and his fucking Metabolism get the fuck out

- you look over at him and he just looks at you like 0_0

- IM LITERALLY LAUGHING AS I WRITE THIS RN WHY IS IT SO FUNNY TO ME

- you're like Fine Okay Bitch i'll Get You A Snack

- so you get ur wallet and peter already knows what you're doing because this aint the first time

"what do you want, pete"

"a snickers, please"

- he says it all innocently and like imsosorryigetobnoxiouslyhungryeverytimewehangoutipromiseillpayyouback

- cause he's BABIE

- is it babey or babie. i forget. oh well

- you nod and go to the vending machines to get his snickers (and one for you too because snickers go HARD damn i want one rn)

- MEANWHILE

- ha

- peter's trying not to focus on the fact that your journal is Lit Rally (literally) sitting Right There

- it's like bro relax i am literally just Vibing

- cause you keep that lil shit CLOSE TO UR HEART

- AINT NOBODY GONNA LOOK THROUGH YOUR JOURNAL

- until today

- yeah

- he keeps eyeing the front lobby doors by the vending machines

- and just slowly pulls the journal to him and starts quickly flipping through it like a madman

- gotta go FAST

- i'm about to pee my pants i crack myself up sometimes

- it's mainly just little doodles and random notes and thoughts and stuff

- peter sees a drawing of spiderman and Deadass goes "awe" OUT LOUD

- a few people look at him and his face gets all hot (Hot Hot! Hot Chocolate!)

- rt if you agree that the polar express has SUCH weird vibes

- that movie is a fever dream ANYWAYS

- and THEN

- ladies and gents this is the moment you've waited for

- (OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH stomp. stomp stomp. OHHHHHHHHHHH!)

- i need to rewatch the greatest showman OKAY

- PETER GETS TO THE PAGE WHERE YOU WROTE THE SONG ABOUT HIM

- HIS GODDAMN NAME IS LITERALLY AT THE TOP OF THIS PAGE THIS IS LITERALLY THE TITLE:

a song about peter because i'm fed up right now

(and then the lyrics right underneath ofc)

- moment of silence

- peter just stares at the page like 0_0

- but the inside of his head is like AHHHHHHHHHHFDNGDFKJGNEKLFNFDJBVDJHF

- then he gets all warm inside he's like holyshitholyshitholyshity/nlikesmetoofuckfuckfuckyeahyeah!

- and then he hears footsteps

- Oh No!

- he looks up and the look on your face is just

- 🅱eter what the Fuck are you doing

"you wrote a song about me?"

graphic design is my passion

- anyways you just stand there for a second before shaking your head

"nope"

"but it says my name right h-"

"different peter"

- peter squints at you like are you sure wait really and you sit down, sliding him his snickers

- you Refuse to look at him so you're just like Staring Off as you take a bite out of your snickers a bit too aggressively

- peter clears his throat and you finally look over

- the Second you meet his eyes you just BREAK and lean forward, burying your face into the crook of his neck with an awkward laugh

- peter lets out his Signature Boyish Laugh (the sound you hear when you enter heaven) and he wraps his arms around you

"it's not gross"

"what?"

"your song says, and i quote 'i like you so much it's kinda gross' and what i'm saying is that it's not gross"

"i hate you"

"but i was just about to tell you that i like you too!"

+ + +

cuties

i swear i either write an imagine in like two hours or a whole ass week there is no in between

anyways i want this to happen to me

[turtle-steverogers]

Hero Complex

lmao hi IM BACK i wrote a fic pfffff it’s kind Shit cuz i started writing at midnight and now its 2:40 am so excuse the BAD WRITING dajfdslkfjalsdkfs

warnings: fire, mentions of death (kinda graphic ish, sad), crying

ship: ralbert

word count: 2762

-

Earlier

“Just- don’t try to be a hero, dumbass.”

Albert’s fingers freeze on the top button of his uniform, eyes darting up to study Race’s face.  He bites back a sigh, something weighing down on his chest as the fear in his boyfriend’s eyes grows.  

“That’s the whole point of my job,” He says softly, “But I’ll be careful.”

Race nods, wordlessly handing him his helmet.  Albert takes it, drawing in a deep breath to steady his hands.  Queso lifts his head from his paws, looking at the two of them questioningly before padding across the room and nudging Albert’s knee.  He lets out the breath he’d been holding and bends over the slightest bit to scratch behind Queso’s ears.  No matter how many calls his squadron responded to, his nerves still managed to run high.

“That’s all I ask,” Race responds, gently tilting Albert’s jaw and kissing him intently.  Albert presses back, heart kicking double time as adrenaline starts to overcome him.  He pulls back, the need to move overtaking him.  

“I gotta go,” He says, shifting the helmet onto his head, “I’ll be home later…”

The unspoken, ‘hopefully’, rings loudly in the air.  Albert really hates this part of the job.

Race nods, dropping his hand from Albert’s face and squeezing his bicep briefly, “Go.  Be safe.  I love you.”

Albert smiles, but it feels strained, “I love you, too.”

Now

“Dasilva, get that room on the right!  Some kid’s in there!”

Albert swears under his breath, shooting a quick nod to Finch as he hurries past him, carrying an infant in one arm and shielding a young looking mother with the other.  He grimaces, adjusting the mask on his face as the building gives the second unsettling creak in as many minutes.  

In the three years that he’s worked for the FDNY, he’d never seen a building fire this destructive.  Details were still being investigated, but from what had been gathered, an apparent fireball had formed on the 14th floor, engulfing the top four floors of the building and spreading quickly to the lower levels.  The casualty count was already tragically high, but between the first responders and following squadrons showing up to the scene, the fatality rate was going down.  

That didn’t make it any less gut-wrenching.  

Albert crosses to the apartment Finch had pointed him to and easily knocked the handle off the door.  He knocked once, calling a loud warning into the room before shouldering the door, which gave way easily thanks to the heat. 

In the corner of the room, a young boy sat cowering against the wall, arms wrapped protectively around an even younger girl.  Panicked breaths were coming vehemently from the pair and as Albert gets nearer to them, he can see the tear tracks that cut through the soot.  He crouches down, trying to seem nonthreatening.

“Are your parents here?” He asks, raising his voice over the roaring flames.

The little boy lets out a sob, pointing a trembling hand to the room adjacent to them.  Albert glances to the side, nausea rolling in his stomach as he takes in the flames licking under the closed door.  Whoever is in there, sure isn’t getting out.  

“Okay,” Albert takes a deep breath, turning back to the siblings, “I need you both to take your shirts and pull them over your mouths and noses, okay?”

He waits for them to do so, then scoops them both up easily, ensuring that they have secure grips on his shoulders, before moving swiftly out of the room.  The building lets out another threatening creak and Albert falters, trying to map out the safest route in his head.  He settles on running to the stairs on the southside of the building, opposite of where the fireball had started.

Five excruciating minutes later, Albert is able to exit the building, immediately seeking out some paramedics and dumping the kids in their care.  He turns back around, taking a deep breath before running back towards the building.

“People still up there?” Spot, another commissioner, calls.

“I don’t know!” Albert calls back, “But we can’t risk leaving anyone!”

“This building’s ‘boutta go down, man!” Spot shouts, jogging up to him.

“I don’t care,” Albert says, firmly, tightening the strap on his helmet, “If I can even get one more person out, that’s one more life saved.”

“Alright,” Spot concedes, “But I’m coming with you.”

Albert nods, steeling himself.

“Don’t try to be a hero…”

Race’s words echo in his head and he bites his lip, casting a hurried glance in the direction of their apartment complex, across the Brooklyn Bridge.

“Sorry, Racer,” He murmurs, hesitating for a short moment before running back into the building.

-

A recently opened beer bottle sits forgotten on the table as Race paces anxiously in front of the TV, a cigarette dangling loosely from his lips.  He’s not entirely sure why he’s smoking.  The thing that usually eases his worries only worsening the sick feeling in his stomach as smoke rolls over his tongue, parallel to the cloud of smoke he’s watching climb higher and higher from the building until it billows off-screen.

This routine is familiar, but it never gets easier.  Letting Albert go will never fucking get easier.  It feels like he’s dumping him into the jaws of death, fire biting at his ankles every time he leaves through their apartment door.  

But he does let him go, allowing himself to grow sick with worry as he immediately searches for whatever information he can find, usually settling on the local news and popping open a beer or lighting a cigarette.  Maybe both.  More often than not, they remain unfinished.

He lets out a frustrated hum, stubbing his half-smoked cigarette out in the ashtray they keep on the coffee table.  He forces himself to sit down and drags a sweaty hand down his face.  Albert had been gone for a good two hours by now, but the fire doesn’t look like it’s getting any closer to being put out.  If any, it looks worse.

Every time a firefighter passes by the camera, Race’s stomach does a violent flip.  He can’t really tell who’s who underneath their face shields and helmets, but it doesn’t stop him from trying to differentiate them.  

Once, the news caught a clip of a firefighter being wheeled into the back of an ambulance looking very much not alive and Race had been violently sick for an hour before Albert came home and assured him that it was not him and he was okay.

That had been a bad fucking night.

Suddenly, the face of the reporter on screen morphs into one of sheer terror and the camera shifts sideways to show the building, crumbling in on itself.  There’s a moment where no one seems to react and Race scrambles to unmute the channel.  Screams ring through the speaker as the reporter and the cameraman run for shelter.  

Race feels his eyes go wide, but he can’t look away.  Somewhere to his left, Queso lets out a whimper, but he can’t find it in himself to look.  A second later, he feels Queso hop up next to him on the couch cushions and settle his weight against his side.

A million frantic thoughts crowd Race’s mind, eventually settling on the horrible debate of whether Albert is in the building or not.  Part of him wants to believe that he got away in time, but logic tells him that the idiot was probably in the building until the last second, searching for straggling survivors.  Fucking dumb shit.  Always has to be a fucking hero.

Sometimes he really hates Albert’s lack of self-preservation over others.

Scratch that.

He always hates it.

He runs his hand through his hair, pulling it almost painfully as his chest tightens.  Taking a deep breath, he presses his knuckles to his eyes, trying to stave off the oncoming panic attack.  He has to stay calm.  If Albert is alive and got out of there unharmed, he’s going to need Race to be a rock for him tonight.

Race takes another deep breath, letting it out slower this time as the vice that previously gripped his lungs loosens a bit.  He can do this.  He just needs to be patient.

He watches the news for another few minutes, picking at his cuticles distractedly as shots of firefighters and paramedics work to reign in the newly charged chaos.  Then, he clicks off the TV, heaves himself off the couch and begins to prepare for Albert’s (hopeful) return back home.

He puts some more food and water in Queso’s bowls, then crosses to the bathroom to take a quick shower.  The water is too hot and he drops the bar of soap three times before he can steady his hands enough to use it.  

He dresses himself mechanically, then digs through their dresser for Albert’s favorite pair of briefs, sweatpants, and a hoodie, setting them neatly on the end of the bed.  As an afterthought, he grabs a fresh towel and washcloth from the closet and sets them on the toilet in the bathroom.  

It’s doubtful that Albert will want to eat much of anything if- no, when he gets home, but Race busies himself in throwing together a quick pasta primavera nonetheless.  If anything, the cooking helps to settle his own nerves a bit.

Another hour passes and Race has managed to finish cooking, eat a little, and clean up the kitchen, all the while forcing down the ever-growing wave of dread.

He’s starting to run out of distracting things to do, so he picks up the book he’s been reading and settles on the couch, eyes scanning the pages, but not comprehending a thing.  

45 minutes later, the front door unlocks and opens.

Race is off the couch before it can swing back closed.

Albert doesn’t look at Race as he hangs his helmet on it’s hook, but Race can already tell that it’s going to be a rough night.  Despite the gear protecting every inch of Albert’s body, his face and hair are covered in a thick layer of ash.  He’s still dressed in his turnout pants, but his uniform top has seemingly been abandoned at some point on his return home.  The sharp tense of his shoulder has rendered his movements stiff and Race watches in carefully masked concern as he tugs off his boots.  

Once they’re dutifully lined by the door, Albert straightens up, looking at Race for the first time, a dull, haunted look in his eyes.

For a moment, Race is scared that he’s going to breakdown then and there, but Albert only clears his throat and croaks, “I need to shower.”

Queso is lingering by the kitchen entrance, but he seems to sense that his company would not be very well received right now.  Race nods at Albert, bending down to pluck one of Queso’s toys from the ground and tossing it in the direction of the kitchen.  He hears the slow patter of Queso’s paws on the tile and sees him pad out of the room in his peripheral.

“Let’s get you out of those pants before you do anything else,” Race says in a measured voice, working to sound easy, but firm.

It’s a testament to how fucked up Albert must be feeling that he doesn’t make a dirty joke at that.

Albert barely moves as Race unbuttons his turnout pants and eases them down his hips.  His gaze is unwavering as he stares blankly across the room.  Race can hear his slightly erratic breathing and it seems as if the adrenaline has yet to wear off.

“Lift up for a sec, love,” Race says, tapping at Albert’s socked feet and waiting for him to lift his legs one by one, allowing for Race to fully remove his pants.

“You can go shower now,” Race says, standing back up, “do you need me to come with you?”

Albert shakes his head, “No, I’m-I’m good.”

“You sure?” 

Albert nods, “Yeah, just- yeah, I’m good.

“Okay,” Race smiles a little, trying to look encouraging, “Shout if you need me, though.”

Albert nods again and makes a stiff beeline for the bathroom.  A few minutes later, Race hears the shower turn on.  He crosses to their bedroom to find that Albert took the clothes he’d set out in with him.

He smiles a little more genuinely as he crawls into bed.  Rolling onto his side, he busies himself with his phone while he waits for Albert to finish up, turning up the brightness to keep himself awake.  Albert was bound to take a while in the shower tonight.  He always does after missions.

A half hour later, he hears the bathroom door open and close and a moment later, the bed behind him dips as Albert joins him under the covers.  Race clicks off his phone and sets it on his bedside table, shifting onto his back as Albert settles into his arms.

“Want me to keep the lights on or off?” He asks quietly, pressing a little kiss into Albert’s now clean hair.  It’s still a little wet and smells strongly like the coconut shampoo he likes to use.

Albert nestles closer, pressing his nose to Race’s neck, “Off, please.”

Race extracts his arm momentarily to flip off the lamp switch, then draws Albert in protectively.  The silence between them stretches on for what could be hours, but Race knows Albert is still awake.

This is also part of the routine.  If Albert wants to talk, he will, but if he’d rather just lie quietly and process, Race wasn’t going to push him.

But he’d stay up with him either way.  There’s no way in hell he’d leave him to handle this alone in any capacity.

Eventually, the silence is broken by a soft whimper, then a short sniffle and Race feels Albert tuck his face further into his collarbone.  He feels his heart break in his chest, but he wills himself to remain steady as he tightens his hold on Albert.

A moment later, Albert begins to cry in earnest and Race presses a firm kiss to the crown of his head, shushing him.  

“I’ve got you,” He murmurs as Albert fists his hand in his nightshirt, holding on like a lifeline, “I’m here and I’ve got you.”

“There-there was a little girl on a fire escape,” Albert hiccups, “and she was screaming for her mom and I was about to go back in to get her, Race, I was about to go get her!  But the building…” he trails off, an awful keening noise sounding from his throat.

Race blinks back his own tears, rubbing a hand up and down Albert’s back, “You did what you could, baby.”

Albert shakes his head, “But it-it wasn’t enough.” His words are stilted- broken- and his breathing is harsh and heaving.

Race maneuvers them so they’re lying side to side, facing each other.  He cradles Albert’s head with one hand and rests the palm of his other hand on his cheek, brushing away his tears with the pad of his thumb.

“It wasn’t your fault,” He whispers firmly, “There’s nothing else you could have done.  You can’t save everyone.”

Albert closes his eyes, biting his lower lip hard enough to draw blood as he tries to take slower breaths.

“I wish I could,” Albert says after a lingering pause, “It’s fucked up.”

“It is,” Race says, “But you helped a lot of people get out of there today, you did a lot, Albert.”

Albert doesn’t answer, just tucks himself closer to Race, breathing in his warmth.  

“Rest, baby,” Race mutters, knowing that neither of them are really going to sleep that night, “I’ve got you, you can relax now.”

Albert lets out a shaky sigh and Race feels his heart grow heavier still.  The concern, grief, and anger at the world for plaguing Albert with the fucked up trauma that accompanies his job are indiscernible from one another.  He wishes more than anything that he could take away his pain, but he also knows that’s as naive as wishing he’d quit.

The most he can do is be there for him, even if there’s nothing he could say to truly make it better.

But he can be there and maybe that’ll be enough.

“I love you,” He breathes, lacing their hands together, “I’m here.”

Albert squeezes his hand, “I know,” he pauses, “I love you, too.”

And for a second, things are a little okay.

-

yeah, so im still alive!

anyway

thanks for reading, chiefs

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[cilliansaccent]

The Peaky Designer - Cillian Fanfic, Chapter 6

Hello, welcome back. Below is the next instalment of my fanfiction!

Leave a like or a comment if you liked it, or if I can do anything better! Please, it would mean the world and to understand if anyone is enjoying my writing. Also, sharing/reblogging would be even better.

PLEASE READ:

I will not be including Cillian’s family as it’s kinda weird since he has children lmao. Just a mention of his parents and a previous lover.

I will indicate in a chapter if there is smut in the beginning and before the actual scene!!

I will add trigger warnings if there is any!!

There is a variety of levels of swearing during a chapter, I will not hold back, everyone swears.

The timestamp for the Fic is now 2016 and onwards!! 

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Background: Gabrijela Babic is a Croatian girl from Sydney, Australia. She is born in the year 1991 on the 24th of December. She studies a Fashion degree in a University with a major in Game Design as well. Her teacher in the fashion designer class managed to nail an Internship on the set of Peaky Blinders with the shows very own Costume Designer, Allison McCosh. There, she travels to London for under a year to learn how to be one, working alongside the actors as well the man she admires, Cillian Murphy. But, her platonic feelings for the man begins to grow into something more, and she wonders whether she should pursue them or let him go for fear of her strict parents and her three older brothers…

Characters:

Swantje Paulina as Gabrijela Babic (swalina on Instagram)

Cillian Murphy

Word Count: 2,507

!!Warnings!!: Smut at the end. 

Date: March 2016

Chapter Name: It’s Only a One Night Thing

Brief Chapter Outline: Gabrijela heads out for a birthday party with Logan before it ends on a very pleasurable note... 

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From Wednesday onwards, it was crazy. She had never worked so fast nor so busy. Her work back at home she was a full-time sales assistant in a lingerie store, and it wasn't as busy like how she worked here. 

To be honest, she wasn't sure if she was cut out for this type of stressful work. She was exhausted by the afternoon, and she hadn't been able to meet with Cillian much as filming became more intense and scenes had to be adjusted or changed. 

Lunchtime began to be whenever you had the chance to stop and eat, so she had alway's prepared herself the morning coming in. Though Logan managed to catch her during her breaks and they hung out a lot, even after when the day was over she had invited him into her apartment and started on watching Supernatural. 

It was quite nice, being with Logan. They watched well into the night, and both had fallen asleep on the couch with empty bowls from the chips or popcorn she had made for them. Gabrijela felt comfortable around the man, and they didn't shy away from talking about their desires and their life achievements. 

They both had the same issues of trying to impress their strict as hell parents and their decisions on what to do with their life would be a forever damnation, according to Logan's mother and father. 

She giggled at that, and he as well. 

Came Friday evening, Gabrijela was allowed to go home early. But she wanted to find Cillian before she left to see how he was going. 

He was walking off set and she caught his arm gently, "Hi!" She smiled. 

"Hey, Gab. Long-time no sees," They moved out of the way. 

"Indeed." She laughed softly, "I wanted to see how you were going." She asked. 

"Good! Good, never better. But a tad little tired but I'm used to this." He said, pulling off his cap and tucking it into his coat's pocket. 

Another reason why she hadn't seen him much was that they had moved to another city at some point during the week, and then it wasn't any time to talk to him. 

"I see. But you're doing a fantastic job, Cillian." She nodded, eyes shining with admiration. 

"Thank you. You seem like you are going somewhere?" He asked noticing the bag. Cillian had also felt sad he hadn't been able to catch up with her much nor see her, her presence always made him feel good and happy. 

"Yeah. Allison let me off early today, said I deserved a bit of an early mark." She giggled. "I wanted to tell you that in case you got worried if I wasn't around later." 

"Oh thank you for telling me that. Appreciate it." He also appreciated her kindness and her genuine self. She had always brought him coffee in the morning, or his favourite sandwich for later in the day. It was the little things she did for him that made him like her even more. 

"But call me later, okay?" She gripped his gloved hand. 

"Always. Hey, before you go, did you want to go to dinner tomorrow maybe? Or we could go to a gig or..." He offered as he trailed off. 

She pouted, "I'd love to but I'm going to Logan's birthday tomorrow night. How about Sunday?" She asked. 

"Party? Huh, okay. Yeah, we can do Sunday then. I'll call you tomorrow again for the details." He said, "Where are you going for the party?" 

"Uh, it's somewhere near Trafalgar Square it seems. I forgot the exact place." She shrugged. 

"You be safe, hm? Don't want you getting into any trouble." He pulled her into a hug and she wrapped her arms around him. 

He was so warm and smelled so fucking good. She couldn't help but bury her face into his neck a little. "I will, I promise." She murmured, he squeezed her gently. 

They pulled away and she kissed his cheek lightly and turned to walk away. 

Cillian placed a hand on his cheek, his smile growing. This girl was rubbing off on him and he couldn't help but become worried about her. He remembered what happened last time he took her out and he wasn't to close with the Logan boy she talked about. Or did he know about his circle. 

But Cillian couldn't fret over her too much or it would seem like he was overpowering her. But he would keep an eye out on her. 

Cillian headed off to get ready for the next scene. 

Saturday Night...

Gabrijela had her hair in a high ponytail. Her chosen outfit for tonight was a black mini skirt with a black long sleeve mesh top with golden stars. She had a simple bra for it. 

She was putting make-up on when her phone rang, she pressed the answer button without looking, "Hello?" 

"Hey Gabrijela," Cillian replied. 

"Oh hi, Cilly." She felt her heart jump. It always did when she talked to him. 

"How are you?" He asked it sounded like he was driving somewhere. 

"I'm alright. Getting ready." She said as she applied her eyeliner on. 

"Oh that's right, you're going out tonight." He mused. "Excited?" 

"I guess so. It's not my first time clubbing, but a first in London." She smiled as she concentrated on putting on her fake eyelashes. 

"You sure you don't want me to come?" He kidded. 

She let out a heavy sigh, "Cillian, I'm gonna punch you when I see you next." 

"Joking! God, don't get so antsy." He mocked, but she could hear the smile in his voice. 

"It's up to you if you want to come, it doesn't bother me. But I don't know about Logan." She said casually. She kinda hoped he would come. 

"Nah. I'm gonna have a night into myself, have some red wine, listen to music and have some cheese." He said with relief. "Been a long week." 

"It has. And you deserve it. Besides, we'll have tomorrow together. I can't wait to see Bath." She said with clear enthusiasm. 

"Good. It's a beautiful town." He said, "You'll definitely love it." 

She saw a message said that Logan was walking down, "Hey I gotta go. I have to get dressed." She said as she added finishing touches to her face. 

"Okay. I'll see you tomorrow, have fun." He said and hung up. 

Gabrijela changed into her outfit, sprayed on her favourite Tommy Girl perfume and pulled up her thigh high heeled boots. 

She grabbed her jacket and her sparkly bag and headed down when Logan called her he was here. 

Logan was dressed in a casual but nice outfit, black jeans and a tucked-in blue with a mixture of a green, red and white floral patterned shirt. His black hair was combed back and curled at the nape of his neck. 

He whistled when he saw Gabrijela, "Wow." He said as they embraced, "You are so fucking gorgeous." 

She laughed, "Thanks man, you look dashing as well." She nodded as she checked him out as he did a little turn with wide arms. 

"One sexy Scottish boy on the menu. Ready to mingle." He flashed a perfect smile. 

She blushed and he called an Uber, a couple of minutes later they piled in and off they went to the club. 

The club was underground and the music was electric, pumping a hard beat. People danced, some grinding against each other no matter who it was. 

Just like home, she thought with a slight shake of her head. She was used to this type of things, as the majority of the young people in clubs, they're looking for a quick fuck. 

Gabrijela had never had a 'quick fuck' with anyone, guy or girl. Just foreplay and that was where she drew the line. She couldn't think of someone being buried within her, especially when she had thoughts that drifted back to her ex. 

Her parents still to this day didn't know the mental abuse she endured through the prick, not even her best friend nor her friends knew about it. Gab worked her way through the pain after the messy break-up, she took counsel on her own and in secret. It helped to ease off the shit of her shoulders, but still, she would remember the dark nights. 

Silence was not the key but she didn't want to dwell on it now, or ever. She was a free girl and she would find someone who would love her as she was, appreciate her body and her emotions. 

Sitting with the group of friends Logan had invited, the drinks began to slide through. She chatted and laughed with the ones around and even danced with the girls. 

Tonight was good, she agreed, no one seemed to brush up against her or pester her. Everyone was in their own world and in their own groups, having the time of their life. 

More drinks, shots, anything. 

Then it was time to move on, the rules here were not as strict as in Australia so by midnight they had gone to four different pubs. Gabrijela had taken easy on the drinks but she could feel the alcohol messing with her head a little. 

Logan had watched her all night and wouldn't leave her side. In their last pub of the night, they were all over each other. Their lips in a heated lock of tongue and teeth. 

Cillian had been in the same club with a few of his mates, drinking and chatting about home. He had seen Gabrijela enter with the group, and had to watch her suck face with the damn Set Designer. He couldn't help but feel a pang of jealously wash through him. He thought back to when he had his fingers inside her, the way her lips felt on his and the sounds he managed to drag out. 

Now Logan would have to hear those very sounds, and Cillian did not like that. 

But what could he do about it? He wasn't going to go there and break them up, for what? Because he was annoyed that Gabrijela may end up in bed with the boy and not him? 

Logan's hand went up her skirt, and Cillian picked up that thrust of her chest. He knew the boy found her treasure. 

Gabrijela pulled back and whispered something to him and his smirk grew as they got up. Logan parted ways with his group and left the pub with an arm around his- around Gabrijela. Cillian's heart squeezed. 

She was young, and she was to be with someone her age. Someone who wasn't going to be an old man in a few years, who wouldn't be able to keep up with her needs. 

But he couldn't help but feel jealous. 

Back in the Apartment...

They laid on the bed, Logan above her and holding her close as he touched her breasts and played with her pink, hard nipples. 

Her soft moans filled the air and he kissed her neck, "Gabe." He murmured and helped her pull off his shirt. 

Gabrijela admired the hard planes of his stomach, letting her fingers brush down his chiselled chest and to his belt buckle. 

Was Logan going to be the one to break her drought of proper sex? She hoped so, he was like a Greek God of some sort.

Well, Scottish God. 

She giggled, "Fuck you're so hot." She moaned as she undid his belt. 

"And so are you." He murmured, his long fingers yanked off her top, and then her bra. Better access now. 

"I want you." She moaned as his fingers flicked her nipples. 

"I'm all yours, beautiful." He said as his jeans joined the clothing on the floor. 

They helped each other undress whatever remaining clothing they had, and she was now laid on the bed, bare. 

His dark blue eyes roved over her body, Gabrijela was not entirely skinny. She had some curve and thickness to her body. But it made her all the most beautiful. 

Gab looked down his god-like body and the huge, thick cock that wanted some attention. "Lay on your back." She said to him. 

He nodded and did so as she moved between his legs. With a hand, she gripped him, with her other she began to touch herself. 

"Oh... Gab..." He sucked in a breath as she began to pump him slowly. She gripped him tight enough that it felt like he was inside something. His eyes shot to what she was doing between her legs and he let out a loud groan. 

She moved her hand faster, "Logan, you are so big. Holy fuck." She pushed two fingers in herself and moaned. 

"Mhm. I hope I can fit in ya." He chuckled breathlessly. 

She smiled, "Of course you will." She said, "But I want you to cum first when I do this." She leaned down and took him into her mouth. 

She sucked lightly on his head and she saw his fingers curl into her bedsheets. She began to take him right to the base. He was deep in her throat. 

"Holy fuck." He gasped, "No one- Oh fuck!" He couldn't talk as she bobbed her head. 

Her mouth was warm and tight, and she took him like a pro. Logan was close already, he was sensitive when he was drunk. 

Gabrijela fingered herself fast, moaning loudly around his shaft. She only pulled back to breathe before she went back to sucking him off. She went faster, eyes shut and for some reason she imagined Cillian. 

Logan let out a cry, his hand in her hair as he came inside her mouth. His load was thick and heavy before she gagged and came as well. 

She pulled back hastily, a bit of his cum leaking down her chin. "Logan." She pulled out her fingers and brought them to his lips so he could taste. 

"I want to ride you now." She said, moving to straddle his hips. 

"Ride me all night long." He said and held her hips. 

But she had paused above him, his cock in her hand and poised to go in. Her heart hammered in her chest, she suddenly felt... Unsure. The whole situation wasn't right despite how clouded her mind was. 

"Gabrijela?" Logan's gruff voice brought her back to reality, "You alright?" 

She looked at him, concern was in his eyes. She could see he was not going to hurt her, there was no malice in his eyes. She could do this. She was going to do this. She can. Screw that fucker. 

"Perfectly fine." She said with a dazzling smile and pushed him into her. 

They both let out a moan as he sat up and wrapped his arms around her. 

She did what she wanted to do and rode him all night with him finishing it off with him on top. 

They both fell asleep in a tangle of arms and legs well into the early mornings. 

[givemequeen]

Directors comentsry for i want to hold your hand part one 🥰

ok So

it all starter with a request but i wrote like 6k or 10k words (Something (my fic) is QUAKING) 

so im like “lets just make this a series” and it was very like in the moment because i dont want to write fics without having them planned anymore (what i did with every single other fic lmao) and i already have this Paul x Lennon!reader (John’s sister) fic so i was kinda like “erm maybe not, i already have a fic plus i want to write everything before posting so...” but then ig i said fuck it and did it anyways

SO

“...You had known them as kids back in Liverpool and it was Paul who had helped you get your current job so you could say you were friends...” idk i kinda wanted them to know each since they were kids but im not going to be going with that as my main idea, y’know?

“...Another plus was George, he was by far the cutest member (and person alive) and you would be lying if you said you didn’t like him...” he is the sexiest and most handsome man to ever live, i will fight you on this (Paul u up there too. and u Ringo and John and John D, Roger and Brian and Freddie you sexy motherfucker. sorry got carried away)

“...He smiled brightly at you and you nearly melted right there. You kindly smiled back remembering you had to keep this strictly professional. // George frowned at the smile you gave. For him, it looked like you didn’t want to talk to him...” ok so i wanted an awkward smile where you are like ‘erm ok’ like this:

“...So this tour was it, you two were going to have to sleep on the same bed...” dont fucking come at me. you bitches know u like this scenario.

“...It was going to be in Scotland, it was their 4th tour...” i googled their tours, fucking sue me

“...and you always insisted on going a couple days earlier to the first stop just so you could ‘settle’ in. No one knew why but they all suspected it was so you could sightsee...” i wanted them to be in the same hotel room for more than just one night, y’know?

“...Another mystery is why they were out here past midnight, shouldn’t they be home?... // ...The reception was empty considering it was long past midnight...” i wanted it to be really late so when you/yn/the reader called the receptionist for a new room or extra bed they wouldn’t pick up, since it’s late 

“...They had been fighting non-stop. They seemed to have ganged up against George which made you feel sad, he was the youngest after all.You turned away from the receptionist who was getting the keys and looked at the boys. They were slapping each other like teenage girls. “Will you four just fucking shut it and stop fighting!” you snapped as quietly as you could...” ok so for the fighting i wanted them to be like using their hands, y’know? like turning their heads to the side and moving their hands really quickly, it’s hard to explain ig

“...Brian always got a room on a different floor. He said the boys annoyed him enough as it is, he didn’t want them knocking on his door at 3 in the morning because they forgot their toothbrush. You waved goodbye to the last sane person, Brian, as he got off the elevator...” can you even blame him for doing that and me for writing this?

“...The door closed and the bickering started again. “Fucking stop!” you snapped as you ran your hand through your hair. “What the fuck is going on now?” you asked as you turned to face them. They hurriedly straighten up and kept their hand to themselves...” i like swearing

“...“George wants to say something-” Ringo started.“No, I don’t!” George complained “Then I’ll say it!” John said with a smirk. “No, you won’t!” the younger man reach over Paul to try and hit John but you were too quick. You slapped his hand away and he pulled it back, dramatically kissing it and soothing it. “Ouch!”...” i was kinda like going back and forward between the two guys, y’know?

“...“Oops, gotta go!” Paul said before rushing off. // “My mum’s calling,” John added as he joined Paul in escaping. // “Left the oven on.” Ringo shrugged his shoulders and they all shut the door of their rooms...” i honestly find this fucking hilarious so thanks

“...went over to room 548...” this number means something but i just dont know what. idk maybe i asked siri? IDK MAN

“... George sighed at your response thinking you were disgusted by him.“Is there a problem?” he asked finally having enough. // “What? Of course, there is, only one bed! The hotel must have made a mistake.” you said with a small chuckle as you avoided his gaze...” poor Geo, well back at it again with the awkwardness

“...You walked over to the phone and dialled the reception’s number. It ringed a couple of times before you realised they wouldn’t pick up. With another sigh, you sat down on the bed and fell back...” see? midnight

“...“I don’t mind sharing yn… I’ll go sleep with Ringo or someone if it bothers you.” George said as he picked up his coat...” ‘if it bothers you’ see? Geo thinks you/she/the reader/yn hates him, booya #writingskillzs

“...You sat up rather quickly and shook your head.“What- No, it’s fine, really.”...” desperate bitch

“...He smiled at you but it quickly disappeared when you smiled back. It seemed forced, like you didn’t even want to look at him...” // “Do you hate me?” George finally asked, he leaned against a dressed and looked at you. //“Hate you? No! Why would I?”“I dunno, you smile weird at me.” //“I’m just shy,” you said while blushing and tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. // “Same here,” he said with a little laugh, you joined in and locked eyes with him...” boom what i wanted, to make it seem like yn hates him but in reality yn is just awkward, yknow?

“...The alarm clock beeped signalling a new hour, it was 1am. You sighed and slapped your thighs in a ‘let’s-get-going’ way...” i want to add the thigh slapping thing a lot but when i do its like weird so thats why i added “in a ‘let’s-get-going’ way.”

“...As soon as the door opened your jaw dropped. Luckily George was looking down so he didn’t catch you staring at his body. His towel was wrapped around his waist exposing his toned stomach and chest...” i wrote this just because of that photo of Geo with a hat and his t-shirt slightly raised

“...“Left,” you said finally looking up at him. He was sat on a table that was against the wall...” i sleep left lmao

“...Due to your insomnia, you stayed up with your eyes glued to the roof. You drummed your fingers over your hand that rested on top of your stomach. George stirred in his sleep causing you to turn to him. You huffed in annoyance wishing you could be the one sleeping. Thinking it might change something, you turned on your side so your back face George...” LMAO ME oh wait i wrote this, shit i forgot for a sec. anyway, i move a lot so yeah

“...You felt the bed move, George must be moving again. Suddenly an arm flopped over your body. Your breath hitched but he only moved closer to you. George pulled you close so his body was pressed against yours. After a couple of seconds you relaxed, he was so warm it made you sleepy and his scent lingered around you. You took a deep breath in, he smelled like cigarettes, aftershave and, well, George...” this is the end fuckers, fluffy shit ay?

OK IDK IF THIS IS WHAT YALL WANTED BUT ITS WHAT YALL GET (why do i even say yall-) SO :)

[sybariticnomad]

BNHA Prompts I want to read/write

>Ghibli AUs- literally any of them would be great but especially Princess Mononoke rn

>Rival School Gang AU- Bakusquad gang vs Dekusquad gang. Don't fuck with Uraraka bc she’ll wreck you w a smile. also Deku totally is one of those people who angry cries. Drama ensue when canon villains are really just out of town school gang that tries to take over their town and squads gotta unite whether they like it or nah. Featuring all might, Aizawa, and co as concerned teachers, detectives and whatnot that just wanna see these kids safe and sound

>Uraraka grew up on wrong side of the tracks AU- doesn’t necessarily have to be completely au, just that Uraraka growing up poor incorporating some of the less glamorous parts of being poor so she’s seen shit and done shit and wants to do good for the world now so no one else has to go through what she went through. I just want this to be a part of her character background so bad. Just scenes with her encountering villains or smalltime gangs and being like “dude we were neighbors I went through the same shit you did fam. Don't do this.”

>Uraraka using her anti-gravity quirk to do what hulk did to Loki in the first avengers movie and everyone being fuckin SHOOK. (can you tell who one of my main faves is yet? lol)

>A fic about ua kids literally being that, Kids. Shenanigans, Movie nights to binge the Rocky series only to end up too pumped to sleep so they all start training like crazy(Bakubro included), youtube channels, Todoroki secretly being messy af and joining the Tea Party where the ladies plus Todoroki spill tea and throw shade EVERYWHERE (all the best news comes from there), Bakugo growing and awkwardly trying to show his appreciation for his classmates and also awkwardly trying to mend his relationship with Deku (teen angst at it’s best and Deku is unsure of how to handle it but Uraraka and Kirishima help the dumbasses), Mina and Uraraka explore their sexuality together bc fuck you if they aint bisexual queens at the very least, Uraraka being one of the few willing to back talk Bakugo so she passive aggressively gives him nicknames like he gives her until he starts calling people by their names(like sweetie bc his sweat smells like burnt caramel, he calls her peaches sometimes bc of her country accent and a couple of other things if ya know what I mean) and eventually the whole class gets in on the nicknaming stuff and Bakugo is Sick Of People Stealing His Shit, Urarakas twang and Todoroki’s education in modern slang because explaining to him what being messy means and spilling tea is funny af (he starts using it all the time in a super awkward way “I believe that this situation calls for some messy retaliation” with long deadpan stares), how many of these kids can't wink and just give you long awkward blinks, teacher appreciation day gifts that get all the way out of hand (Aizawa gets the benign noise cancelling headphones and death wish coffee and then someone sends him a bottle of tequila and he wants to know which fucking child got a hold of alcohol to both admonish and thank them. Poor all might gets all the medicine, who’s idea was it to give present mic a loud mic and youtube channel why he’s already too loud please make it stop), someone gives Bakugo spicy chocolate cookies for valentines day and he doesn't want the sentiment but hot damn those cookies are fucking delicious, the kids get into American music because present mic recommends it to help with learning English and that's all fine and dandy until the kids start hosting death matches with Denzel curry’s Ultimate as the match song and wow how many of these songs have so much profanity please stop (just because you’re swearing in English kids doesn't mean some people still won’t know you’re swearing), Sex Ed Class for the kids (wow what trauma, what drama, Aizawa you are not giving the sex ed seminar they will get too scared. you will monitor Midnight as she gives the lesson. All might go have a cup of tea and try not to think of the kids having sex because golly they’re all still wee babes), Teachers shipping students and other staff lounge gossip, Spin the bottle truth or dare where the dare is always make out with the people you want to fight, Momo is cleaning out her closet and giving away clothes so please let the mad fight over who can get more clothes from her giveaway ensue(Uraraka is poor and on a mission, who know when she’ll be able to get clothes as nice as these again? she might enlist the help of some of her guy friends and she might also float all the clothes she wants to the ceiling out of reach of anyone else), BNHA girls using snapchat and momo’s closet to recreate Beyonce music videos and killing it (I really just want to see 7/11, the suck on my balls shtick, and Sorry because it’s a whole lotta friends hangin out and being sassy), WHO LET THESE KIDS WATCH South Park.  y’know. Shit like that. Wow this bullet point got way out of hand.

>Night Vale AU 1- Fuck you it’s Tododeku. Todoroki is obviously Carlos with his perfect hair and perfect teeth. Uraraka is totally dana, Deku is of course Cecil, Aizawa might be station management? Might be old man Jenkins. Whatever it is I'm here for it. 

>Night Vale AU 2-Alternatively its the cast of bnha just in the wtnv universe and their day to day lives dealing with night vales weirdness. do as you please.

>Underground Fighting/Fight Club AU- What It Says On The Tin. BNHA kids doing illegal underground fighting stuff and do with it what you will. 

>Oresama Teacher AU- I know I keep being super aggresive but still fuck you I think mafuyu and Uraraka would be able to flip flop each other or alternatively, mafuyu is urarakas grandmother and she taught Uraraka all the ways of badassery minus the fighting stuff bc she old

>Fantasy AU where for once Uraraka actually is the badass witch and not just the confused amnesiac- also What It Says On the Tin. Bitch can kick some ass.

>Adventure Time AU- For shits and giggles bc I said so I suppose. I think the bnha characters in that universe would be funny af with just the right dash of angst/drama.

>Assassination classroom au- what it says on the tin. 

>The Myth Of Hades and Persephone AU- featuring your chosen bnha ship. Imma leave mine out of it because the one I would prefer to put in would probably yield a lot of hate and I don't want my preferred ship to get in the way of anyone ignoring these prompts and not writing them? idk imma leave mine out but y'all get it.

More to be added at a later date bye lmao

[almostviki]

pursed

mmmmmm hello ya’ll. shit’s been wild. um this is 1-2 days late for this exchange (let’s see if this goes up after midnight or not) so I’m incredibly sorry to @swlotakulady34 34 on tumblr for the delay! anyway this is a shortened version of the original concept because i could not get the ending to work out the way i wanted it to so i just cut out the whole thing lmao. the editing’s a bit jank and i swear i’ll fix it later and also probably addd a sequel bc this is mad unfinished and weirdly enough, i feel like this doesn’t even actually answer ur prompt that well because i’m so bad at writing fluff but anyway here’s ur hurt/comfort fic i hope you like it and that everyone else does too!

Title: pursed

Genre: Angst (I really tried to make it fluffy but it wasn’t working out)

Word count: 3,184

Summary: The situation is this: Logan and Patton have been dating for two years and three months when they meet Virgil and Roman. Six months later, Patton asks Logan permission to date them, and Logan reluctantly agrees. Two months after that, the nightmares start again.

Or: Logan is insecure and bad at communicating his needs. 

Ao3 Link!

   Patton shoved his wallet and phone in his back pocket and bustled around the kitchen, searching for his keys.

   "I don't know if I'm going to stay the night," he said. "I'll text you later if it looks like I'm staying."

   "Alright." Logan was stirring soup in a pot, eyes fixed determinedly on the individual bubbles rising and popping, the surface of the water rising and falling as steam expanded, and tried to suppress the feeling of his own hot gas rising in his chest. This wasn't Patton's first time visiting Roman and Virgil's apartment. He went there with enough frequency that he had a small stash of his own clothes at their place, a fact which unsettled Logan in a way he didn't want to analyze. 

   "If I stay, I'll be back tomorrow morning, so we can go to lunch before your calculus class because isn't your test tomorrow?"

   "Yes. It's at eleven."

   "I'll be back by ten, then." Patton stopped rushing around in time to shoot Logan a reassuring smile. "You'll do great though. I know you will."

   Logan knew, too. If there was one class he wasn't worried about failing, it was mathematics. He returned Patton's smile with one of his own and turned off the heat on the pot.  

   "Don't worry if you're late," he said, taking in deep breaths to disguise the unsureness of the words. "I'll understand if you'd spend the morning with them."

   "No, I'll be on time. You're still important to me, Logan. I said we're having lunch together and we are." Patton sighed, running his hands through his hair.  "I don't get the feeling that you're comfortable with this. Do you need me here tonight? Maybe I shouldn't go."

   Logan was either very good at controlling his facial features or he had grown too tired to emote regardless, because he didn't think any of the truth of Patton's words showed on his face.  

   "You didn't manipulate my actions, Patton. I want you to go on this date because it would make you happy. As your boyfriend, it's part of my job to support you."

   "But I don't want you to think I'm not putting you first. I'm going to call them and cancel."

   Logan grabbed Patton's wrist before he could reach behind him to get his phone. "No, you won't. I'm not an egocentric child. I can handle having my boyfriend go on dates and I can handle spending the night alone. Don't alter your plans because of me."

   "Logan, I just-" Patton stopped mid-sentence, searching Logan's eyes for answers. "Are you sure you're okay?"

   "We're okay," Logan said, and if Patton noticed he didn't answer the question he didn't get the opportunity to pry. Logan turned Patton by the shoulders and pushed him in the direction of the door. "Enjoy yourself. Tell Virgil I said hello."

   "What about Roman?"

   "I have nothing to say to him."

   Patton cracked a smile and kissed Logan gently on the cheek. "Be nice. I love you. See you in the morning." He picked up his backpack from the door and was gone.

   Logan waited fifteen minutes for Patton to forget something and burst back into the apartment before releasing the breath he'd been holding. He wanted so badly to throw his mixing spoon across the room, to dump out the pot on the stove onto the tiled kitchen floor and let the broth spread over the kitchen like a violently expanding oil slick, to turn the burner back on and place his hands directly on top and wait until his skin was charred and his hands and head were finally numb to pain.  Logan hadn't been lying; he wanted Patton to go on dates with other people. He wanted Patton to be happy. He just hadn't known making Patton happy would hurt so bad, feel so isolating. The apartment had never felt emptier. There were still bubbles popping on the surface of the broth, but it felt colder than it had just moments ago. If he tasted it, Logan was sure it would be bland.  

   Dimly, Logan wondered what Patton was eating for dinner. Probably something sweet with Virgil's fingerprints on it. It made Logan want to throw up.

Logan and Patton met in freshman year, when both of their respective roommates dropped out and they were forced to room together second semester. Logan's previous roommate tended to keep to himself, and they mostly only exchanged greetings when coming or going. Patton was decidedly the opposite of that. He was a dance major, and somehow his four-hour practices never depleted his boundless supply of energy. Logan sometimes thought Patton managed to put extra hours into his day, because he was in a borderline excessive amount of clubs and weekend expos but still managed to keep up with his schoolwork and find time to laze around the dorm doing nothing. He was also too nice. He would go out for food and bring Logan something as well and then not let Logan pay him back.  

   "I just noticed you haven't left the room except to go to class," he said, holding out the bag. "Gotta keep your energy up if you want all that studying to mean anything."

   Logan bit back a question about how he could possibly know that when Patton himself had hardly set foot in their dorm since sunrise, but he accepted the food graciously and ate it all, just to please him. He pretends he doesn't notice how their fingers brush in the handoff, or how bright Patton's eyes look when Logan takes anything he gives him.

   Three weeks before the end of term, after a dozen more food runs and late nights, Patton set down Logan's coffee with a smile and turned to head to practice.

   "Hey, Patton," Logan said, unable to contain it anymore.  

   "Yeah?" Patton said, stopping midstep.

   "You know you don't have to buy me coffee, right? The coffee shop is down the street, and we also have a coffeemaker in our dorm, so it's a waste of money."

   "Yes, but the coffeemaker doesn't make it the way you like it," Patton pointed out. "So I take the liberty of getting you something you want."

   "But I never asked you to do that."

   "I want to," Patton said, uncharacteristically tired. "Don't you get it Logan? I want to do things for you."

   Logan didn't know how to handle to excessive emotion in Patton's voice, so he just swallowed and nodded, and Patton breathed out heavily and went to practice.  

   Four days later, Logan set a banana smoothie hesitantly on Patton's desk when he returned from his morning calculus class.

   "If we are expressing affection through the exchange of food," Logan said, trying not to sound as nervous as he felt. "Then I would like to, um, reciprocate."

   Patton blinked up at him, but then his smile stretched so wide Logan worried he'd be blinded.  

   "Thank you, Logan," Patton said. He picked up the smoothie and took a sip.  

   They were good for two years before it all came crashing down.  

   "We need to talk," Patton said one day as they were eating dinner on the couch. He'd made spaghetti, which he only does on days he wants to eat with chopsticks, despite Logan telling him numerous times that these are "not that kind of noodle". Logan froze, then set his pasta down and turned to Patton.

   "Is something bothering you?"

   The look on Patton's face was one of apprehension, and even though Logan has seen Patton nervous over the smallest of things, this fear sits deeper in Logan's gut because it's him Patton is scared of. Logan feels dirty and guilty in equal measure.  

   "I have a crush on Virgil and Roman," Patton finally said

   Logan looked at him for a minute, processing the words over and over and still not able to find the correct meaning.  

   "What?"

   "I have for a while now." Patton didn't look at him; his eyes flit across his food, the TV remote, the door, anywhere but Logan's face. "I thought it would go away but...it didn't." He must've caught Logan's rapidly closing expression in the corner of his eye because he was quick to reassure. "I didn't act on it. I wouldn't do that to you. But I can't hide it anymore so...I just wanted you to know."    

   Logan blinked, feeling as if the piece of his brain that's supposed to tell him how to react to this has atrophied in his skull. "Are you polyamorous?"

   Patton shifted uncomfortably. "Can't say I've put a lot of thought into it. I've only been panicking about this for a week or two."

   "What were...what do you want to do about it?"

   Patton's hands dug into his sweater. "I won't do anything about it if you don't want me to."

   What a cop-out.

   Logan had met Roman and Virgil. He didn't dislike them, but he also didn't know them that well. They were Patton's friends, not his. Now he wished he'd gone out more with them, that he'd accepted Patton's invitations to see movies and get pizza, because maybe then he wouldn't have such a twisted, dark-faced image of both of them. His entire being trembled with a foreign and ugly emotion. Patton, for his part, didn't react. He waited, still and silent, for Logan to push back down his frightening emotions and take a deep breath.

   "Thank you for your honesty," he said, "but I need time." His voice sounded painfully formal with how tight it was but if he let a single shred of feeling into his voice he would self-destruct.

   "Of course," Patton said, nodding quickly. "Whatever you need." And it occurred to Logan that Patton thought he'd be angry, thought they might break up over this, but the thought of breaking up with Patton, of living without him, is too bizarre to even consider.  

   "I'm not upset," he said softly. "But this is a lot to process."

   "I understand." Patton matched his volume and tone. He always was a good energy-matcher, great at reading moods and adjusting his own behavior to complement Logan's. Not that this skill comes into play often; Logan made it a habit to always remain as neutral as possible.

   "I love you," Logan tried, and the soft smile Patton gave him evaporates some weight from his chest.  

   "I love you, too."

   And just like that, the decision was already made.

   Roman was loud and brash and stuck too stubbornly to unfounded opinions.  In the beginning it grated on Logan's nerves like nothing else. Logan tried to at least be cordial, to not make this harder than it had to be, but he didn't exactly know what the protocol is for interacting with the people your boyfriend is dating. Roman is taller and louder than Logan and has more arrogance in his pinkie finger than Logan has encountered in the sum total of his life. Patton was enamored by him. Roman's boyfriend, however, was a polar opposite. He was slightly shorter and ganglier than Roman, sometimes looking as if he was swimming in his hoodies and sweaters. He trailed behind Roman quietly most times, but when he had something to say, all he has to do is touch Roman's arm and he'd fall silent, giving Virgil his full attention. Their dynamic is tight, solid like the floors under Logan's feet or the walls around him, and just watching them together, feeding off each other in a perfect loop, made Logan feel immensely off-balance.  

   Logan's phone dinged with a text message from Patton, telling Logan he made it to Virgil and Roman's apartment safely. All the energy in Logan's body went towards sending an affirmative response. He dished out the soup he made for dinner and sat on the couch, letting the hot bowl warm his numb hands. He didn't want to eat, or study, or do anything. Most distinctly, he wanted to not feel like he's being abandoned for no good reason at all.  

   It was only six-thirty but he put his bowl in the fridge and went to bed.

   At midnight, he woke up with a scream on the edge of his lips, sheets damp with sweat. He wasn't crying or shaking or digging his nails into his skin, so it could be worse, all things considered. He can still hear the taunts in the corner of his mind, see the disappointed frown burned into his retinas. Patton's voice echoed in his ears, a mockery of his true tone, yet the words are incisions in Logan's skin, whispers of clingy, indecisive, possessive. It might've been five minutes before he found the strength to get up. It might've been an hour. Logan's grasp on time tends to get a little shaky at times like this.

   As quietly as he can, he stripped from his sweat-soaked clothes and showered, trying not to scrape his skin raw with the stress of his fingernails. and even though the water is scalding he still has gooseflesh on his arms. He didn't cry though. Patton has some kind of sixth sense for when Logan is crying and Logan definitely doesn't want Patton to find him now, definitely doesn't want Patton to ask him what's wrong with those honest eyes of his that make Logan feel guilty for having secrets. So he doesn't cry. He doesn't go back to sleep either. Instead, he walked to their small bookcase and took everything off of it and reorganized it. Up until that point, it was organized by color, but seeing the blocks of red and purple made him sick to his stomach. In the morning Patton would see it, and he'd know that Logan didn't get any sleep, but at right then Logan's biggest concern was quelling the stress building in his chest. He put them in alphabetical order, the correct order, he convinced himself, but then doubted himself and sorted them by date of publication. By the time the sun has risen, his hands had stopped shaking and his heart wasn't beating out of his chest anymore, but he felt as if he'd been awake for much longer than one night.

   He's no stranger to nightmares. He used to get night terrors all the time as a kid. He'd wake up screaming and crying, with no air in his lungs and fire crawling up his skin. He hardly remembered the dreams then but he remembered the unadulterated panic that followed, and his mother would grab him in her arms and soothe him softly until he wasn't shaking and his heart wasn't beating out of his chest.

   Over time the night terrors lessened into ordinary nightmares, which meant he didn't wake up screaming like he was dying, but on the downside, he remembered these dreams. Formless, plotless, sometimes just swatches of color on a blank background mixing and crashing themselves into a crime scene. When he was nine he woke up and vomited on the floor of his bedroom, hair practically standing on end. That was when his mother's patience ran out.

   "Clean up your mess," she said without emotion. "You really should get a handle on this, Logan. Whatever is troubling you, fix it."

   So Logan cleaned up his own vomit and threw his clothes in the wash and sat on his bed, afraid of going to sleep for fear of waking up again worse than before. He dragged himself out of bed and padded to the living room, where his parents kept a giant bookshelf that was mostly decorative, but the books on it were definitely real. He picked out a random book on sociology and started reading, even though he didn't understand over half of the words in it. As long as he was avoiding sleep, he might as well do something useful with his time.

   Nothing helped. Not village remedies of teas and meditation, not medicines, not simply staying awake until he thought he was too tired to dream. His psychiatrist told him at age thirteen that he was internalizing too many of his feelings and they were now manifesting in a negative light. Logan didn't see how that could be possible. How could he be internalizing feelings when his mother always said he didn't have any?

   Now in his dreams, his mother's pursed lips were replaced by Patton's narrowed eyes, her silent judgment overshadowed by Roman's biting tone and Virgil standing with his hood up, face hidden to shadows. Instead of birthdays, he fears disappointing math tests and home-cooked meals with no one at the table with him. The only thing that stays constant is a door that slams over and over again, a thousand times in his lifetime, and absence of countless figures followed by Patton walking out the door, leaving him and his smoothies behind, telling Logan that he'd always liked the other two better anyway.  

   His fingers itch to call Patton. Logan throws the phone across the room. He's not going to call Patton because Patton is staying the night at Virgil and Roman's apartment and Logan doesn't want to ruin that, and anyway if he calls Patton he'll probably wake up the others and then they'll be asking after him, their fake worry indiscernible to the naked eye from their truthful concern. If he calls Patton he'll be admitting that he's weak, that he can't handle himself, that even though he's twenty years old he still has night terrors that leave him too scared to move or think and then Patton will leave him because he's been wasting his time.

   Even worse: Patton won't be mad. He'll come home and wrap Logan up like his mom used to do before things went bad. Logan will tell him what he's scared of and Patton will reassure him that he's making things up, that he doesn't love Logan any less now that he's also dating two other people, And then Logan will cry, not because he's relieved but because he's nervous and biding his time for the escape. Because it took two years for him to realize how fragile everything is around him.

   He won't call Patton because whether his boyfriend picks up the phone or not shouldn't wreck him the way it will either way.

   Patton makes it home by 9:30 and finds Logan on the couch.

   "You look tired," he said, immediately concerned. "Did you even sleep?"

   "I've been up a while revising," Logan says, and Patton's lips form a thin line. They look just like they do in Logan's dreams.

   "Okay," Patton says, unconvinced. "You'd tell me if something was wrong, right?

   "Of course," Logan says, and crossed out another equation on his notes. "But I assure you I"m in perfect condition. How were Roman and Virgil?"

   Patton's eyes light up as he begins to talk, and Logan thinks of boiling soup, closes his eyes, and holds his tongue between his teeth with all the control he can muster.

[ilegnangeli]

Random May Thought #1

I think I may have forgotten how to properly write an entry on Tumblr. Much features have changed since I last posted here. If it weren’t for Instagram’s connect to Tumblr feature, I wouldn’t have updated this blog in years. Last I posted was a picture of my penmanship in Mandarin. I was still a student in China back then. And well now, I am back to the mothership.

Two years ago, COVID-19 didn’t exist. Oh wait, it did, they just hadn’t named it yet or they haven’t discovered it yet (I actually remember they used to call it nCoV). Two years ago, I was still lying in my bed in my spacious dorm room probably wondering why time flew so fast. Two years ago, I was a completely different person. I had plans two years later, you know. Plans that got soiled. I didn’t think I would still be here. I should be experiencing spring elsewhere and yet I’m basking in the scorching heat of summer in the Republic of the Philippines. Not that I’m complaining. Alright, fine, I am.

Life has been pretty tough lately. I think I wrote the same thing in one of my book reviews in Goodreads. After reading that book by Paul Kalanithi, I became more aware of how finite life is. I’ve always loved books that sorta ended in tragedies (maybe it’s the masochist in me lmao). But reading a memoir of someone who suffered a similar fate to those fictional characters I’ve read before, reading through his personal struggle made me think about how life—at the end of it all—is truly fragile.

I also read through my old entries in here. I laughed at some. I smiled at some. I sorta became sad after reading some entries. But I’m glad I wrote. Now, I’m feeling like continuing this thing I do often when I’m overwhelmed by life: writing. There’s a sense of bittersweetness to reading your old diary or journal entries for the world to see. Two nights ago, I dug through my old notebooks and read some of my written entries in there. Ten, nine, eight years ago versions of me who loved writing and sharing her thoughts on pages of now worn-out notebooks. Again, I’m glad I wrote.

Writing is probably something I’m not really best at but I’m good at. And suffice to say, I enjoy it. I love writing and it’s probably going to be the end of me. Funny how going back home, here in the mountains of Rizal, transforms me into a sentimental freak. The life in the city is probably the most ideal, future-focused lifestyle but the old soul in me will always go back and try to rekindle the sad and happy memories of the past.

Right now, I’m sat at the end of my bed. With a laptop. Typing these random thoughts. I see my piano on the left. I see my bookshelves right in front of me. And I see my luggage, to my right, that I haven’t used since I got back from China (I didn’t use this for my trip to Japan, I used a smaller one lmao).

I leafed through the pages of my old planner. It was the planner I used for my final year in university. I saw this “Dream Board” that I ever so creatively put together using cutouts from magazines, stickers, and sticky notes. I wrote there that I would make films, music, and literature. Funny how those “dreams” became reality. One by one. I also remember listing down the places I’d always wanted to visit in that planner. I remember writing all the countries that I would, one day, visit. And by some weird miracle, I’ve ticked off so many of those places. Well, except Amsterdam (because damn, the Netherlands is so far away). But don’t worry self, we’ll get there. Eventually. Lmao.

My dream board was extended to the next page where I listed down so many things that I would save up for. Teenage me would be proud of herself because ten years later, she has owned that John Green book collection (she now even has at least three versions of each book John Green has published, I know that’s ridiculous but please stop judging me lol), she has also owned two MacBooks (an Air in 2015 and a Pro in 2020), she has bought a digital piano (God, I srsly am in love with this piano, teenage me would cry out of joy I swear), and she has travelled to a lot of her dream destinations and countries. Teenage me would be so proud of who she has become. I seriously sighed as I typed that last line.

Ten years. Feels like an entire lifetime ago. I didn’t think life would be this fast-paced. I mean, thanks technology but boohoo because here I am, somehow struggling, asking myself every single day, hour, minute why adulting has to be this difficult. I sorta blame my teenage self because, she wished for this moment. She wished to fast-forward to my yuppy self. But then again, who am I to complain, THAT WAS ME ten years ago. Bitch, you did not. Lmao.

Earlier this afternoon, it’s nighttime as I type this, I spoke with one of my co-workers. We haven’t known each other that very long. But it feels like we’ve known each other forever. She’s a Libra, just like me. She’s a 92-liner, too. Oh the joy! And she’s a psych major, I envy her. Sometimes I still wonder why I didn’t take that path in university. Accountancy was shit and as much as I loved my Sintang Paaralan, I just didn’t want to be there anymore for personal reasons. You’d know, if you ever met me in person, I’ll tell you. Wow, am I really that good at moving on? Anyway, being a communication major is and was a great experience. I hate competitions but I joined so many competitions in that field and lost some but you gotta win some, right? So I did. Thank you for the wonderful experiences, Piyu.

Whoa, I didn’t think I’d be writing this long. But I’m not done yet. So as I was saying, I spoke with her. She isn’t just a colleague to me now but more like a best friend. I never thought I would meet someone my age who spoke the same language as me before her. I’m a nerd. If that isn’t already obvious. And if being caught by our director talking about Sigmund Freud and Maria Montessori isn’t enough proof, then I guess let’s talk about global warming, greenhouse effect, and the melting polar caps. I like talking about ideas, phenomenas, and books. Crucify me! #ReasonsWhyImStillSingle

I’d been praying about something recently. And I only got that clarity when I finally spoke to her about it. We’ve been on this topic for about a month now. And occasionally we like to make fun of this topic. But I guess, when something isn’t really meant for you, God will make a way for it to not, you know, find its way to you. Thank you, LORD.

She told me so many things that made me realize that the person I like right now probably has his reasons why he’s not making the first move. And I understood that. She insisted that my feelings were valid and it was okay for me to feel those things—to think those things. But oh my goodness, I told her, this person is so lucky. Like I swear to God. Because I don’t really “like” guys that often. I don’t feel easily attracted to anyone. So it is by some miracle that I ended up liking this particular human sub-specie (bro, you should feel privileged, too bad you won’t be able to read this). Anyway, It was so clear to me. And I had to move on. Immediately. But what’s weird about it is that I just took a nap. And when I woke up from that nap this afternoon I felt nothing. Like that feeling expired almost immediately. It completely dissipated. So ridiculous, right? I’ve harbored feelings for this person for some time now (it hasn’t been that long to be honest) and I’m just over that feeling now. In an instant, too. I don’t know why. It’s probably one of my talents.

Wow, I really do move on fast. Don’t I? Am I cruel (to myself) that way?

So I had decided to busy myself with work. Plan about my graduate studies. And hope for the best. But for now, I’ll enjoy the rest of my leave from work. I sighed. Again. As I wrote that. My head hurts. I don’t know why. But it does. And I almost typed that in Korean.

On another topic, I’m thinking about compiling all of my literary works in some way. I also feel like commissioning my niece and my older brother to illustrate some of my poems for me. I’ve actually thought about this like a year ago amidst the pandemic. But the lazy ass in me just kept postponing. And I blame myself for procrastinating because all my “plans” haven’t come to fruition. But I’ll get my shit together. Eventually. I need to make this happen. At least before I expire. Lmao.

P.S. I’m tired. I actually stayed up late last night. Or should I say earlier this morning. I video called one of my ex-colleagues. It was also a really nice chat. But I’m not used to staying up late anymore. I’ve burned tons of midnight oil in university. NEVER AGAIN. I’m sleepy to be honest.

P.P.S. Tomorrow’s my elder sister’s birthday. I’m going to post ancient pictures of her on my stories.

[writers-leir]

soulmate!junhui

it’s been forever i know i’m terrible at this,,,,,,,,and i completely got carried away with this it’s like 3k of messiness i’m sorry (ಥ﹏ಥ)

soulmate!junhui where you have a little bit of each other’s personalities floating around inside you + you can feel the other’s emotions

you’re normally the discreet mom friend

so like you pack extra snacks that are “for you” but it’s actually for that one friend who ALWAYS FORGETS THEIR LUNCH

you’re also lowkey like “ew” when they start play flirting with each other and you

but then sometimes you make a sort of 180 and start flirting back and they’re like !?!?!?!?!?!/?

and then 10 seconds later you’re back to normal like what,,,,,,,,was that,,,,,,,,,,,,,

and it’s just so confusing to both you and your friends because they never know what to expect

eventually they get used to it though

the newer friends you make never know which personality is yours and which is your soulmates

but your older friends are always like LOL when you start flirting with them

once during class you sent one of your newer friends a heart when they turned back to ask you for a pencil and they almost fell out of their chair when you winked after

your friends have started to call you out on your “fanservice” as they call it

joking that your soulmate must be an idol

honestly though you just want to meet your soulmate and stop randomly flirting with your friends (and even the cashier that one time you went to get a midnight snack) ((you stopped going by that store at those times))

and even more

your soulmate always seems so,,,,,,,,,,,,,unnaturally happy

you’ll wake up at 3am tired and you’re all ready to go back to sleep but?????????you suddenly get a huge burst of energy and it’s like wow i’ve never been more awake time to go dance

your best friend once found you in one of the dance studios at 2am and they were like WHAT are you doing you have a test in like seven hours

sometimes you’ll feel a little bit bad for your soulmate because you feel like you’re always being negative

but at the same time you can’t help it if your professor gave you three chapters to read for the next day plus a test to study for and a presentation in a different class

junhui doesn’t mind though

he notices that you have those reALLY bad days and he tries extra hard to be super happy and excited because he knows that could pass on to you

although he wishes you could be a bit less,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,”egh” about fanservice because it’s his JOB and he would like to KEEP IT thank you very much

they’ve had to redo a few of their practice videos and edit some of out a few parts from them because he suddenly seemed to hate fanservice

seungcheol joked about him never being able to meet his soulmate because they apparently hate fanservice (so the chances of them going to a fanmeet were minuscule) and junhui’s heart SHATTERed

and it’s frustrating for both of you because you really want to meet each other but,,,,,,,you can’t communicate

sometimes you’ll be able to feel the other’s emotions but other than that you’re both in the dark

one time you tried to send junhui an emotion that was a mix between longing and frustration to see if he could respond to it

but all he got from that was you being sad

and in turn all you got back was him being heartbroken because he thought you were sad and you were like askdjghljkSDGHAKDG NO W AIT i’ve made a huge mistake

it was a mess of emotions for a few minutes until you decided to go against your values and send him love

and he was like KSJAGSKLDGksjhagsd my sOULmate!!!!!!!! just sent me love!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you couldn’t sleep for the next two hours because junhui would NOT stop gushing about it to his friends and you could FEEL HIS EXCITEMENT AND HAPPINESS and maybe you should send him some more love if this is what the result was

ANYWAYS

believe it or not you’re actually a pretty big fan of seventeen

your friends ship you with junhui (oh wow look at that coincidence) because you’re both like the mom friend,,,,,,,and because they think that all the fanservice will be so cute if it’s directed to you

but your bias actually isn’t junhui lmao,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

it’s woozi

(and no it’s not JUST because of that one time he almost killed mingyu with a guitar,,,,,,,,,although that did play a pretty big role)

when your friends and you went to buy the new album and you got seokmin and they got woozi you were like!!!!!!!!!your favorite is seokmin right let’s trade

you love all 13 members equally (honestly who DOESN’T) but woozi holds a special place in your heart

but recently,,,,,,,,you’ve started to notice junhui a little bit more

like there’s SOMETHING about him that catches your attention

maybe,,,,,just maybe it was that one time when you were watching a v live and when soonyoung decided to try and do aegyo and you cringed,,,,,,,,,and you swear you saw junhui cringe too but it went by too fast to really notice anything

but then again most of the other 12 cringed too so you might’ve just been seeing things

and of course one day your friend goes like !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!they’re having a fanmeet we should go!!!!!!!!!!!!

(i actually have no idea how fanmeets go i am sorry,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,)

on the day of though you’re super excited because a chance to meet woozi face to face???? yes

and oh wow how funny is it that junhui and woozi happened to be seated right next to each other,,,,,,,with junhui at the end (((((((((:

your friend is in front of you so you get to see their super excited face when they meet their bias and they’re like,,,,,,,,,,,aksdhgalsjdghiJSDGHASKDG and you’re just like lol what a dork

so you meet each of them and ask them how they’re doing and stuff

(and you manage to hold a decent conversation in english with joshua and vernon!!! how exciting!!!!!)

you get to jihoon and you’re like aksghaskldgdskLHGA why is he so pretty

your friend would have made fun of you right then and there if they wasn’t in the middle of a conversation with junhui

when you get to junhui though you’re still super hyped from meeting your bias

and then suddenly it’s like????????????you have a rush of emotion

and junhui obviously is going through the same experience since he’s your soulmate

but he composes himself and smiles and goes like hi!!!!!!!!!!!! and you’re like w h y is my heart suddenly beating so fast

and like clearly there’s a connection between you two but you’re both still very clueless about being each other’s soulmates

until after the fanmeet and you look in your album and wHO WROTE THEIR NUMBER IN IT

it’s not even like under a specific message from any of the members

it’s frickin right smack on the inside of the back cover

you send it a text like “who are you?”

which results in a slightly paniCKy “who are you????????????” back

and it’s in english so you’re like ??????????? what

and you’re typing back like “did you not write this number in my album what”

you don’t get a reply back until like ten minutes later (and this time it’s in korean)

“i’m junhui. from seventeen”

and at first you’re like LOL nice try buddy

and then they send you a photo and it’s actually junhui with joshua in the background

they attach a message with the photo that says “joshua had my phone just now so that’s why the first message was in english”

but you’re still like no? literally you can find a photo like that anywhere????

and the person sends you a message back that’s like pLS BELIEVE ME

but you’re just like d u d e no

and obviously because it actually is wen junhui and you just DON’T BELIEVE HIM

he has to facetime you

and you’re like aksdjhgkljHDSGASKLGD but okay if you’re that desperate to be proven wrong

but then you see the screen and it’s?????????wen junhui??????????in the flesh??? (not really but like it actually is him)

you fall off your couch because oh m y GOD that was actually wen junhui w H AT

and junhui kind of lets out this horrified scream because all he saw was you disappearing from the screen and then the phone shaking until it landed on the ground,,,,,,,,,and now all he sees is the ceiling of your apartment

and of course joshua’s in the room too so he’s like ?!??!?!??!!?are you ok a y

you finally pick up the phone and you’re like w h a t is this am i dreaming

and joshua sees you too so he’s like oh!!! that’s the person with the super cute bag this afternoon at the fanmeet!!!!!

and junhui’s like yes that is indeed the person,,,,,,,,aka my soulmate

and both you and joshua are like,,,,,,,,,what,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,did he just say,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,?!!?!??!?!?!?!??!?!??

joshua reacts first though and he’s like !!!!!!! i gotta tell the others this is such a great thing yay!!!!!!!! and basically being the angel he is while congratulating junhui and then leaving

and you’re still sitting on the floor like b o y you better not be trying to prank me because i swe a r

but junhui’s just smiling that super cute smile and then he goes “don’t you notice that you don’t feel any more of your soulmate’s emotions??? and honestly i kept giving fans fanservice for like 20 minutes after we met and i never felt the need to cringe”

and you’re like now that you say that,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,you may be right,,,,,,,,,

and of COURSE he’s junhui

so he adds on a little something

“also because i totally felt my heart speeding up when i saw you”

and you’re cringing like OK LET’S STOP THERE but also same

unfortunately he’s an idol so he has stuff to do so he’s like i’ll text you!!!!!!!!!!! we have a break in a few days so we can go on a date then!!!!! and you’re like kasldhjglkGHALSKGD O K THEN

he hangs up right as your friend comes in (and as the rest of seventeen barges into the room)

and you don’t wanna tell your friend anything yet so you make up a dumb excuse about why you were sitting on the ground and they shrug it off like ok

but junhui can’t get away that easily lmao

the members are like !!!!!!!!!!!!!joshua told us that your soulmate is that fan with the really cute bag from the afternoon

and he’s just like yes that is my soulmate :)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

the excitement kind of dies down after like a week of not hearing from him

and you’re starting to believe it was a dream because????????what kind of luck would you have to have to get wen junhui as your soulmate

and then two days later at like 3am your phone starts ringing

and your roommate is like turn that OFF PLEASE i have a lecture in four hours

you decide to leave the room to answer it

and guess who

(((((((((((((:

it’s junhui

and you’re like junHUI WHY would you facetime me i look disgusting

but he’s just like noOoOOooo you look cute especially that little line of drool on the right side of your mouth

and you’re just like IM HANGING UP and he’s like WAIT NO

you notice that he’s outside and you’re like ??????what are you doing outside at 3 in the morning aren’t you gonna get in trouble

and he’s just like LOL i was gonna go pick you up but i totally forgot to ask where you live,,,,,,,,,,so can you please come meet me i’m at the park by the mall

and you’re like??????????????wen junhui that is literally 30 minutes from my apartment

and he looks so heartbroken because he totally did not think about what might happen if you did live far

and you’re just like BUT you know what i don’t have classes tomorrow lemme go get my hoodie real quick

and he’s like noooo!!!!! tell me where you live i’ll go pick you up it’s too dangerous for you to walk alone

and you’re just like junhui p l e a s e you’ll get lost it’s fine i have my keys

he’s still frowning because he,,,,,,,,,,,,really doesn’t want you to be walking such a long distance so late but you’re just like it’s okay!!!!!!!! if it makes you feel better i’ll stay on call with you

he’s still ))))): but ok,,,,,,let’s do that

you get to the park in record time because you ran + took a shortcut

once you get there you see one person sitting on the park bench and he’s wearing a black hoodie and you’re like 90% sure it’s junhui

you tell him to turn his head

and you see the black hoodie person look around and you’re like !!!!!!!!!yes that’s him i see you!!!!!!!!!!!

he’s wearing sunglasses and a mask though and you’re just like junhui,,,,,,,,,,it’s 3am i get that you don’t want to be seen but really,,,,,,,,,,,,,,the sunglasses,,,,,,,,can go,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

you can tell he’s grinning though through the mask and you’re just like what are you grinning at ( ≖.≖)

“i have the cutest soulmate ever askdghasdkljg”

and you’re just like j u N HUI PLEASE

he’d be gushing about how cute you are because you left the apartment wearing your pyjama pants and an oversized hoodie

honestly you probably look like a mess on legs but he’d still be all askdgkjlsDHGASLKDG over you because!!!!!!!!!!!he seriously does have the cutest soulmate

that’s kind of how your first date goes tbh

you just walk around the empty streets chatting

and then when you walk him back he’s like ))))): i should be walking you back ))))): and you’re just like it’s o k i’m gonna take the bus it’s almost 6am anyways

when you get back to your apartment your roommate is like ????????where were you?????????

and you’re just like l m a o i was on a date with my soulmate

and they’re just like !!!!!!!!!!!!!! ʕ •̀ ω •́ ʔ tell me but you’re like LOL no you have a lecture to attend go get ready

junhui messages you soon after saying that he got a 10 minute lecture from seungcheol about staying out so late

and you were like you should have pLANned this better you dork

“i’m your dork though”

“JUNHUI IT’S 6AM”

“(♡ˊ͈ ॢ꒳ ॢˋ͈)♡”

“ily too,,,,,,,,,,,dork”

you’re literally just about to go back to sleep when,,,,,,,,your phone starts ringing,,,,and you’re like wEN junhui please let me sleep;;;;;;;;;

but when you open the message it’s a picture of him with mingyu in the background holding up a peace sign

and the message attached says “i know you’re probably really tired, so i’ll message you later tonight,,,,sleep well!!!!!!! (ps. mingyu says hi & he wants to know where you got your bag bUT YOU DON’T have to reply right now!!!!!) dream about me ( ˘ ³˘)♡”

and you’re just like he’s,,,,,,,,really cute aksdghjalksdfhdaskg and you message him back and say ok and that you’ll call him later in the afternoon and he’s like OK!!!!!but go sleep,,,,i’ll feel bad if you feel tired later ))))))))):

to be very honest junhui might forget to message you sometimes

he tries to call you every night if he has time (or at least send you a message saying he’s alive and well and will call you the next night)

but he does,,,,,,,,forget

and you don’t worry very much because you kNOW he probably just left his phone on the table and went to bother minghao or someone

coincidentally whenever you see him and his groupmates you’re wearing the bag that you wore to the first fanmeet

and every single time mingyu sees it he’s like!!!!!!!!!!!!where did you get it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(you end up buying him one for his birthday and he almost hugged you to death before junhui was like that’s MY soulmate >:( no hugging them to death!!!!!that’s my job)

junhui still flirts with you though

you could be married 10+ years with 3 kids and he’ll still flirt with you

at 80 years he’ll probably still be like “do you have a bandaid? because i scraped my knee falling for you” and you’re just like S T O P

and a lot of times you don’t know if you’re dating junhui or if he’s dating his groupmates

but then you go visit them for movie night or something and they’re all like ewwww get a rOOM and junhui’s like OK and you’re just like wait what no junhui i’m not making out with you with your groupmates in the next room

he’s a super great boyfriend though

LOVES to cuddle okay

he either clings to you and doesn’t let go or waits for you to get clingy to tease you about it

there’s no in between

buys you little things he sees at street markets that reminds him of you

and ALWAYS talks about visiting his family with you and you’re just like i would,,,,,,,,very much like that yes

he sometimes starts planning things super in detail

example: when you said that you’d like to travel around china he literally,,,,,pulled out his phone and started searching for plane tickets and you were like JUNHUI YOU’RE PREPARING FOR A COMEBACK

boy just wants to show you his home country (even if you are from there,,,,,,,he’s gonna be so excited aksdhfaklsdf cute)

he’ll also absolutely LOVE IT if you learned mandarin or cantonese just so he can talk in his mother tongue, he’ll even help you honestly. and if you already speak either? wow look at that junhui’s complete heart eyes whenever you speak it

he has such a huge heart please treasure him a lot;;;;;;;

[miserelysia]

So I watched the Netflix Death Note adaptation...

And I did a liveblog because that’s how I cope with bad adaptations of things I love. It’s pretty long but so was the movie. Also swearing.

HERE WE GO~

- Setting: Seattle. I'd say you already failed, Netflix, but I was prepared for this. And alright, so we have a re-imagining of Deathnote. - Our hero creepily hangs out right behind cheerleader practice and does homework, awesome - also he a nerd who does other people's homework and judges them - cool - chick who smokes and gives him eyes is Mia - and Light doesn't know how to smile - well it really does seem like Ryuk CHOSE him in this version instead of just randomly throwing his Death Note down to earth - why are we all afraid of rain we're in SEATTLE - super awkward, tortured troubled nerdy white boy, gotcha - ...light are you not reading the other rules. that's kind of important. THERE ARE RULES FOR A REASON. - oh shit it's time for willem dafoe's big debue - HI FRIENDDDD - LMAO LIGHT'S SCREAM - I MEAN, RELATABLE BUT - RIDICULOUS - why didn't they just name him Larry ffs "Light" just sounds weird for an American kid - I'm gonna call him Larry - okay let's jump right to DECAPITATION LOL DAMN SON - DAAAMMMMNNNN SON - THAT IS NOT THE KIND OF HORROR I WAS LOOKING FOR IN THIS MOVIE - OMG LARRY U KILLED KENNY - way to trash the classroom Ryuk - what happened to my friendly bored shinigami - he got Americanized(TM) - LARRY YOU GOTTA READ THE WHOLE TERMS & CONDITIONS ON SOMETHING LIKE THIS FFS BOY - i mean granted we don't have the whole terms & conditions because they weren't all written out in the manga - or were they?  i never read them - bUT THEN I WASN'T THE ONE WITH THE POWER TO FUCKING DECAPITATE PEOPLE BY WRITING THEIR NAME DOWN - thank you Ryuk for giving the correct pronunciation of your name - so either Ryuk is lying about the rules of the Death Note, saying it HAS to belong to a human, orrrrrr this is another Adaptation Thing - okay well Larry definitely isn't any Light Yagami but his character is.... pretty realistic for a Troubled White Boy(TM) - just wondering how the heck Larry is gonna be smart enough to avoid detection - also is he going to take a chip and eat it - lol damn how'd you know Antony was at a dinner party, Larry? - AWWWWWW HIS DAD LOVES HIM YAY - okay Ryuk's design is..... okay - LARRY WHY R U BRINGIN IT TO SCHOOL - AND WHY ARE YOU SITTING IN THE BLEACHERS DURING GYM??? - or are you creeping on cheerleaders again boy wtf - "you saw a guy decapitated? damn that's hot" mia what's wrong with u - LMAO YEAH SURE SHOW HER THE DEATH NOTE????? - OKAY - ugggghhhh come on, anyone who TOUCHES the death note can see Ryuk not just the keeper. why change that rule???? you could have so many more amazing "HOLY SHIT AN 8 FOOT TALL DEMON?!?!?!??" scenes - "i have a death god" well i'm glad they're not trying to make everyone say "shinigami" the whole time - "you of all people want to see this" HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT CAN YOU TELL SHE'S A SOCIOPA--okay granted, she did talk about wanting to see Kenny's decapitation - "you snot-nosed little douchebag" that is.... such a tame insult for a guy who's holding a gun to a lady??? - um why was that rogue SWAT truck just driving through at top speed you can't control other people i thought??? - also why did he just fuckin EXPLODE when it hit him like a damn garbage bag damn Netflix - holy shit Mia what's your damage why are you so hype about this - lmaoooo nerdy virgin boyyyyy - no longer a virgin boyyyy - having weird sociopathic sexytimes with his weird sociopathic girlfriendddd - white boy saviour complex is go - AYYYY GOD COMPLEX IS GO - time to get busyyyyyyy KILLING PEOPLE - um did you really target EVERYONE IN A NIGHTCLUB WTF BOI SOME OF THEM WEREN'T EVIL - or are they just saying someone shot up the whole place BUT YOUR VICTIM'S ACTIONS CAN'T RESULT IN SOMEONE ELSE'S DEATH I THOUGHT??? - i do like that L is a black man - why is Watari kinda creepy - AWWWWW GOOD THEY KEPT THE CANDY OBSESSION - "you'd kill him? you'd kill him for me???" omg mia seriously WHAT IS UR DAMAGE - my precious boy L and his rainbow candies - this is all i wanted. quirky L dealing with the police - HE'S PRECIOUSSS - OOOOOHHHHHH BURNNNNNNN"CHILD WEILDING POWER HE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND" - "now i'm rooting for this guy" THANK YOU RYUK, ME TOO - i'm in love i love L I'm rooting for him too - u gonna kill ur dad larry? - "i think you can tell when you're sitting across froma killer like kira" he says to his CLEARLY SOCIOPATHIC SON - mia U HAVE ISSUES WHYYYYYYYYY - r u serious - relationship issues now too - da fuq - how is mia EVEN WORSE OF A PERSON THAN LARRY - HOLY SHIT GIRL - THE ENTIRE DAMN TEAAAMMMMMM - omg larry it was MIA not ryuk - seriously are you serious are you saying it's ryuk are u FUCKING SHITTING ME NO - "just making sure you hadn't died" lmao thanks L for ur concern - "light turner is kira" okay then L, i mean i guess we had to make the conflict go fast but okay - "i don't do check, only checkmate" nice - "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND MEEEEE" lmao larry you aren't light - "you're the one who flew into the sun, I'm just here to make sure you actually burn" I LOVE U, L - U NEED HIS FULL FUCKING NAME NOT JUST WATARI. FUCK YOU DID THE PEOPLE WHO MAKE THIS NOT READ THE DAMN MANGA - I'M SO ANGRY THIS IS SO POINTLESS - L IS SO SAD -MY BOY - BBY - HIS FRIEND IS GONE - lmao this got overdramatic real friggin fast - r u serious MIA IS A MUCH BETTER LIGHT THAN LARRY IS - LIKE THE ORPHANAGE WOULD JUST LEAVE THEIR INFO LYING AROUND???? - AND WHY HAS L NOT REALIZED WHERE LARRY WOULD SENT WATARI IT'S SO OBVIOUS - DA FUQ IS WRONG WITH THESE CHARACTERS - why is there cell reception in that place - why did that guy kill him THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS??? - WHY DID KNOWING WATARI'S FUCKIN NOT EVEN REAL NAME WORK - AND IT WAS POINTLESS - POINTLESS LOW QUALITY BADLY RESEARCHED WRITING - Larry u fuckin idiot you don't deserve to be Light and I need the plot twist to be that the death note was actually mia's all along - "you don't get to feel superior for being a pussy" omg mia - hot damn she killed everyone - HOLY SHIT SHE GONNA KILL HIMMMMMMM - HOLY SHIT - MIA - HOLY SHIT - HOLY SHIT - "now go get my goddamn book" HOLY SHIT - I LOVE THISSSSSSS IT'S WHAT I WANTED ALL ALONG - BADASS GIRL IS A BETTER LIGHT THAN LARRY FOR REAL - L MY PRECIOUS BABY I'M SORRY - ummmmmmm larry you could just burn the page urself u know??? - car chase & foot chase nice added unnecessary drama - Y U HIT L IN THE HEAD RANDOM MAN THAT'S NOT NICE - "NOW GIVE ME MY FUCKING BOOK OKAY" HOLY SHIT MIA - LMAO HE PUT HER NAME IN - LMAO TAKIN DOWN THE WHOLE FUCKIN FERRIS WHEEL - "I TAKE IT BACK" LMAO LARRY U CAN'T - RYUK WHAT THE FUQ - LMAO AND HIS HEART IS GONNA STOP AT MIDNIGHT WHILE HE'S HOLDING HER RIGHT - SUCKS FOR YOU MIA - oh oop no she falls instead - SHE REALLY LIKED THAT BOOK I GUESS??? - BYE KIDS - oh nice image with the flowers exploding - "innocence destroyed~" or w/e guys please she was already a crazy sociopathic monster - R U SERIOUS THE ONE PAGE - THE ONE PAGE WITH HIS NAME - FALLS PERFECTLY INTO THE FLAMES - FOR REAL - WHO IS MYSTERIOUS MAN????? - great yeah just put the death note on his chest and then the nurse can find it - why'd he magically wake up from a coma - why is no one responding to his increased vitals - YEAH U KILLED UR GIRLFRIEND WAY TO GO - i mean she sorta killed herself but - oh wait nope he actually killed her - wow - so that last bit of plotting almost earned you the right to be called Light, Larry - but not quite - anD WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF ENDING IS THAT??!?!?! - I HATE OPEN ENDINGS - LARRY IS ABOUT TO DIE RIGHT - I DECIDED IT. LARRY DIES. - EXCEPT THAT MAKES L A KILLER - BUT L'S CHARACTER HAS ALREADY CHANGED DRASTICALLY SO... - YEAH, LARRY DIES - i mean the other option is that his dad's like "wtf" and locks him up forever - but then American Ryuk just gives the Death Note to someone else and now that Kira is a thing they'll think it's up to them or something??? - who knows - whatever - i'm done with this weird ass convoluted mess. - well the beginning of the credits was cute at least, with the bloopers and the fun times

Okay this wasn't a complete waste of time but they absolutely lost me as an adaptation at the point where Larry was able to control Watari wITHOUT KNOWING HIS FULL DAMN NAME I MEAN COME ON THAT'S WHY HE'S CALLED WATARI. Also constantly screaming "THERE ARE SO MANY RULES" like hey maybe you should take the time to read them Larry wtf is wrong with you. L losing it was interesting but man I miss the calm, 5-steps-ahead-of-each-other cat and mouse of the actual Death Note. I think I'm gonna go watch that now.

[professor-abeloved]

RULES: FINISH THESE 92 STATEMENTS AND TAG 20 PEOPLE.

Got meme’d on tagged by my homie @principal-mc !! thanks bud i love youuuu <3

THE LAST:

1. Drink: c2 lemon 2. Phone call: my mom 3. Text message: my best friend @rpgskill <3 4. Song you listened to:  Mahiwagang Puso from the Encantadia 2005 OST 5. Time you cried: uh, yesterday

HAVE YOU:

6. Dated someone twice: nah  7. Kissed someone and regretted it: nope 8. Been cheated on: hindi 9. Lost someone special: er no 10. Been depressed:  always yeah 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: drunk yes, thrown up no

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. purple!! it’s always been my favorite hehe 13. mint green 14. blue

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: yup both on here and irl! i love you guys!! 16. Fallen out of love: no... i’ve fallen out of my qp feelings tho if that counts? 17. Laughed until you cried: yES oh my god i always tear up if i laugh too hard 18. Found out someone was talking about you: yeah. 19. Met someone who changed you: “everyone you meet changes you for better or for worse… change is continuous and inevitable so this is a given” <- couldn’t have said it better myself @principal-mc 20. Found out who your friends are: yup, i did when they were there for me/tried to be there for me.  21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: dein

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: about 90%? my account is personal kasi. although i do have some friends that i added for ~fb games~ when i was 10... and some people that added me because we have 100+ mutual friends. okay actually, sometimes i randomly add cute people that fb suggests for me to see if they’ll respond and they do!! i find it funny HAHA and then months later i find out they go to a different university or even a different country... 23. Do you have any pets: ish? my family has pet dogs in the province, though we used to have a lot of fish and rabbbits 24. Do you want to change your name: yep! someday i’ll find a way to make the name-changing process easier in the Philippines, I promise. 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: uh had an anxiety attack because there was block drama and i didn’t know what to do when inviting my blockmates out lol 26. What time did you wake up: 12:13 PM 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: posting the amazing art i had commissioned from Millerizo aka Mod Ton from Buhay Kolehiyo!! i’m in love with her art, i swear. 28. Name something you can’t wait for: to fix my damn bank account lol 29. When was the last time you saw your mom: an hour ago? 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: me HAHAHA uh fuck, my hang-ups and flaws i guess 31. What are you listening right now: the television 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: 707′s neighbor Tom? actually wait i think I have a niehgbor named Tom omg 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: “Pixelberry’s writing team” ...actually same, Zee. honestly i’m so disappointed. 34. Most visited Website: Tumblr 35. Mole/s: On my right thigh and left shoulder lmao 36. Mark/s: uh i got a lot of stretchmarks on my thighs and stomach 37. Childhood dream: becoming a superhero. tbh it’s a work in progress, there’s gotta be a radioactive spider here somewhere... 38. Hair color: brown with blond hightlights 39. Long or short hair: short!! 40. Do you have a crush on someone: sighs yes and he doesn’t go to my uni anymore :^( 41. What do you like about yourself: my writing!! 42. Piercings: my ears are pierced 43. Blood type: A positive walang aayaw 44. Nickname: El/L/Elle  you spell it however you want haha 45. Relationship status: single but married to about a billion fictional characters 46. Zodiac: Virgo~ 47. Pronouns: they/them, he/him, she/her it i’m cool with them all since i’m bigender lol 48. Favorite TV Show/s: Steven Universe, Brookline 99, HIMYM, Encantadia (2005 and 2016 huhu i miss it so much) 49. Tattoos: waley 50. Right or left hand: right 51. Surgery: i’m actually gonna have an operation for my wisdom teeth on Thursday haha pls pray for me 52. Hair dyed in different color: er highlights count right? though i do plan to dye it purple 53. Sport: i don’t... do sports though i hope to do arnis or something with swords in the future! 55. Vacation: YES PLEASE. technically im having it right now though we have a project to submit tomorrow 56. Pair of trainers: oh they’re like rubber shoes? i think well yeah i have like 3 pairs

MORE GENERAL:

57. Eating: siomai and cheese sticks! 58. Drinking: c2 pa rin mga ulol 59. I’m about to: start on that letter to pb bc really wtf. 61. Waiting for: him lol charot. actually i am waiting for maxwell to be an LI so?? 62. Want: peace and happiness for the world 63. Get married: um it’s not in my plan but if a future partner wants to and/or if there are tax benefits then sure? 64. Career: student po 65. Hugs or kisses: hugs!! 66. Lips or eyes: eyes eyes baby 67. Shorter or taller: can they be the same height? i’m 5 feet tall so most people are taller than me anyway 68. Older or younger: er older? 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: i only have one weakness, the kryptonite to my superman, the one thing that turns me into a puddle on the floor... biceps 71. Sensitive or loud: tbh both. like i’d say loud but i also need someone sensitive because i’m shit at expressing myself 72. Hook up or relationship: i’m grayro ace buddy so neither. 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: troublemaker lmao. pranksters are cute (as long as the prank doesn’t harm anymore/make them uncomfortable) and yes troublemakers for the oppressive system make my heart go boom <3

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. Kissed a stranger: ew 75. Drank hard liquor: not yet 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: dude i lost my right contact lens during a math review and i kind of stopped wearing them 77. Turned someone down: ...yes. more times than i’d like. 78. Sex in the first date: L O L 79. Broken someone’s heart: i hope to god not 80. Had your heart broken: i wouldn’t know, i don’t have one 81. Been arrested: nah 82. Cried when someone died: yes. 83. Fallen for a friend: uh do QP feelings count as falling? because if so yes.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. Yourself: someday, i hope to 85. Miracles: yup! 86. Love at first sight: no. i believe in attraction at first sight, but not love 87. Santa Claus: yeah, it killed me when i found out my mom was writing those letters to santa. it was funny though because one time i asked who santa was, and they gave me a 9 page research of the origin of santa HAHAHAH 88. Kiss on the first date: uh if i like them enough and if they initiate, maybe 89. Angels: yes zee is an angel <3 all of you reading this are angels too <3

OTHER:

90. Current best friend’s name: kristi 91. Eyecolor: hazel brown/light brown with dark flecks 92. Favorite movie: Ghostbusters 2016!! watched it thrice hehe. oh and i recently watched kubo and the two strings and fell in love <3

Tagging: @quinnskelly @mirasols @mewly/@molliartsie @lanapowellblog @ladyashtonofcordonia @grimdarkpixels @keephollywoodweird/@gunfawkes @hollyashton @jebsplayshss/@spacetravels @sarcasticchoices @andythenerdyfriend @ohmymaxwell​ @kittenmusicals​ @rr-roe-es​ @maxwellbeauxmont​ @mermadeheart​/@pixelberry-pippa​ @danielnelsen @evapaw-of-thunderclan @lifeof314universe @craighsiao and anyone else who wants to do this!!