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valentinahogdahlholm · 16 days ago

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Camera obscura

I like a light, and him next to me. Leg pressing against mine, Breath in my neck.

The security of destiny in the laid-back posture, echoing through the voice. My camera obscura.

Desperation in voice reflected in grip. So hard it draws blood. And yet I never let go, Dug deeper until it met bone. Healed like so. And it became part of my body, Like pyrola I stared at the sun, laid quietly in the grass through the night while the twinflowers danced over me.

His hands gripping their hands.

Where I laid on my back, Followed every proclamation. Promised to become a celestial body.

II: Yesterday my friend said she to a guy that she didn't want to be a feminist cunt. I don't dare to say no to the boy who took my hand on the bus.

Can't afford to drop the halo, last piece of the celestial body The blood ran, but I never became holy.

When I stare at the sky I see his face, shining new constalation. A darkness in the eyes which I try to ignore. That which grew from the body that would belong to the sky. Openings glisten, but are snuffed out by a sheet.

Imperfect, unfinished artwork.

Despire every cut being perfectly planned after aincient measures of perfection. Bleed from the deep cuts in my forgotten body.

So I scream and the tears run, But all I muster are these smoothed over words which I hope will say what I can never, looking into my creator's eyes. Fear on my chest, mare which rises from me. And in these words, in this light, she is a person. Of the same material as the newest constalation.

Jag satt som ett ljus, och han bredvid

Hans ben tryckte mot mitt.

Andedräkten mot nacken,

Ödets säkerhet i den bakåtlutade hållningen, ekad i rösten. Min camera obscura.

Desperation i rösten speglade greppet, Så hårt att det drog blod från min hand, Och ändå lät jag dem aldrig släppa taget. De grävde sig djupare tills de mötte ben, Läkte samman så. Och det desperata greppet blev del av kroppen. Som pyrolan stirrade jag mot månen, låg tyst i gräset genom natten medan linneorna dansade över mig,

Hans händer hårt greppande de glada leden,.

Där jag låg på rygg, Följde varje budord, Lovad att bli en himlakropp.

II: Igår sade min bästa vän till en kille att hon inte vill vara en feministfitta. Jag vågar inte säga ifrån till killen som tog min hand på bussen.

Råd att tapa glorian, sista biten av den himmelska kroppen. Blodet rann, men aldrig blev jag helig.

När jag stirrar mot himmelen ser jag hans ansikte, skinande ny stjärnbild. Ett mörker i ögonen jag försöker ignorera, Det som växte fram ur den kropp som skulle bli himmelens Öppningar som skiner, men hävs av ett lakan.

Konstnärens imperfekt, ofärdiga verk.

Trots att varje rispa var perfekt planerad efter antika mästares mått. Blöder ur de öppna såren som lämnas i min bortglömda kropp.

Så jag skriker och tårarna rinner, Men allt som kommer fram är dessa lignande tillrättalagda orden som jag hoppas ska säga vad detär jag aldrig förmår när jag ser min spegelbild i min skapares ögon. Skräcken på bröstet, maran som ur mig stiger. Och i dessa ord, i detta ljus står hon framför en människa., Av samma material som den nyaste helgade himlakroppen.

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beylinine · 2 months ago

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looks like someone was 360 behind the back no-scoped in the 17th century. and you know what? its only going to get worse

Arthur James Kirkland headcanons

There will be no intermission and I will try to be normal. Relating to EN and his relationships and general person ig. History words will be used just fyi i gotta make use of this degree i can taste it already. Will I bring up the fact that I'm studying history everytime I ramble about hetalia? Yes, anyways.

Was Arthur’s life ever truly peaceful? Well no. personifications never know peace ToT:

I sorta mentioned this in (this) ramble on personhood, but oh my god, when he was a 'preteen' to 'early adult' he really was 360 behind the back no-scoped throughout the late 16th to early 19th centuries (which inspired my drawings)

He did go out and explore during the 16th century (and a bit during the 18th cen.) but between the reign of James I (left pic) and Will & Mary (right pic),,,just,, yikes. but puberty does that to all of us.

Fashion historians please dont come for me regarding the outfits i tried ToT. But on the topic, while he would be out sailing the seas he enjoyed having his hair messy and natural, brushing it slightly imo for royal occasions. But as he had to grow and learn more, he began 'dyeing' his hair with different powders (i cant explain but google can sos ToT) as blonde hair was seen as a more 'feminine' hair colour and Arthur was a growing into a 'man' so he wanted to appear as such (especially when you think of his older brother, the dark haired Alasdair) Green eyes were also seen as odd (i think?) but cant do anything about that lol.

-Lots of burnt hair when the brothers would attempt to curl their hair for royal occasions oop

As the personifications are their own persons, with their own emotions and beliefs and whatnot, that can sometimes get clouded with the intent of the 'boss'. So do all his brothers 'hate' him? I don't truly think so, but since they have all had long complicated histories as themselves and as nations, the reality in their minds get murky. But when Arthur was a 'boy & teen' and was having to fight his older brothers? Oh yeah, he was crying whenever he could 😭 Like to believe that as the older brothers, Alasdair (🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿) and Dylan (🏴󠁧󠁢󠁷󠁬󠁳󠁿) did feel bad in some way seeing as they had to go years fighting and personally ignoring their baby brother.

Pre-roman Britain brother relationships my beloved. Little infant Arthur (based on The Beautiful World Christmas episode where they showed little FRA and tiny ENG wrapped up in a blanket)

and I say pre-roman because the Romans built a wall between England and Scotland and tried to build a ditch between Wales and England (that wasnt done until Anglo-Saxon times (which is when I believe Arthur managed to at least stand on his own two feet and talk yee old english), Offa's Dyke for those interested), brothers were definitely not happy about that (canon cue the brothers sending little Arthur curses and birds to attack him).

and pre-Norman because France doesn't start appearing around Arthur until Arthur is slightly older. Dylan took care the little nugget, a bit reluctant of letting humans coddle the 'baby'. Get that baby practicing magic ASAP (stayc girls its going down).

Speaking of Anglo-Saxon times, vikings! Vikings invaded different parts of the British Isles. So you would think there's bad vibes between Norway and Denmark and the British bros, but we don't see that in the show (some in the comics over blockades i think). If anything, Norway and England are friends that bond over magic (Christmas 2011 comics), All this to say some of the behaviour the personifications demonstrate are deliberately their own (i just wanted to say that FRA is just a big douche).

I know i said earlier that Arthur didnt leave England much during the reign of the Stuarts, but I believe he would sometimes just have enough and try to runaway onto new world ships and eventually was officially sent more often in the early 1700s

More on Arthur's relationship with his older brothers Dylan and Alasdair!

Based on geography alone, Arthur spent more time with Dylan. Even when the humans would try to separate them, they would find ways to meet by the marches (areas between ENG & WAL) or in Northern ENG whenever Alasdair had time to meet.

ENG and WAL were not "united" until the 15th century and SCT joined two centuries later, so it wasnt until then that the brothers were allowed to officially meet or gather (and then civil war breaks out, take a shot everything i mention it)

I like to think the brothers had a place in each of their nations where they could go get away from the humans and just live together (and that continues to this day, they yearn for the mountains; it was mentioned in the Hetalia Collezione profile that Arthur just wants nothing to happen -a phone that doesnt ring and a newspaper with no news or smth- like omg,,, he wants that grass so effing bad)

Real brotherly relationships through and through, the bants, the fights, just lads being bros. i love the family relationships hetalia has ToT <3

This is where I ramble about Arthur's relationship with Alfred and Matthew sit down yall:

Going off to see his younger brothers was a relief for Arthur from the national and international chaos he had over his 'late teen to early adult' years

Being the youngest after so many years, this was his chance to raise others, it would work out gr- (i was then shot 47 times)

-Ok but honestly, he constantly mentions (in manga panels relating to colonial americas) how being in the new world and being able to take care of his brothers like make food for them, is a stress reliever. He always apologizes for having to be away or having to leave quickly, saying how he knows what its like to be alone (curse you romans)

-And Arthur is just genuinely interested in having a good relationship with his new brothers (see: him looking at Matthew as his own person when they meet and not as just a piece of land with resources, I will talk about this manga chapter until the end of time HWS Chapter 192 my beloved) (also: when Alfred is trying to find Davie's flower and Arthur brings him some from England, even if it had to take a while but again, chaos at home so ToT it all ties back to how things that happened are out of his personal control even when he tried his best to make stuff work out) and he wants to do his best 'raising them' for the scary reality of being what they are after he just had his centuries of chaos

Mentioned this in my last ramble as well, but this genuine connection being then cut in the late 1700s went beyond mental and emotional turmoil, leading to Arthur getting ill and being looked over by Matthew for a bit (leading to Matthew and Alfred having a genuine argument not relating to them as countries, yall i cant do this anymore)

General current person headcanons:

He is an excellent baker, I will die on this hill populated by sheep. All the brothers are, really (can personally only vouch for GB bros, I have not set food in the land of Ire for more than a layover sos ToT) Yorkshire puddings my beloved

Loves to bake pastries and desserts from other places and will send said representation an email/whatsapp asking for recipe ideas (he is so email/whatsapp just like me,,, just like me.)

Yes, Arthur is a London Boy…but before there was London there was Manchestaaa! That man spawned somewhere in (historic) Lancashire, I know it (plus War of the Roses and all that, fun little historical importance tie

He can drive and I would trust him to do so, but definitely prefers public transport (and will complain about it at the same time, proper brit!)

Can he swim? Yes…not very well. He can stay afloat for a few minutes before he begins to panic.

Arthur needs so much therapy but that is not an option so collecting old books and writing as a hobby to cope it is then?

Truly would be a great writer (going off of all the famous English works ofc), but would dabble in painting, knitting and sewing, and music (which, as we all know, he loves to the point of having an electric guitar tattoo on his ass)

Definitely one of those pretentious old music collecting snobs, but enjoys supporting small and local indie-punk rock bands (is loving the Charli renaissance and PinkPantheress era he's so proud)

He is an emotional and sleepy drunk as seen in the comics and show. He will be crying over his past mistakes one minute and snoring over the table the next.

Sports are serious business in the british household. World cup 2022 wales vs england? Oh that was a weekend rager even though the match was during a weekday (based on witnessing the rivalries irl, it was serious yall) Snacks are always a must and even when absolutely hammered, he will clean up as to not deal with it the next day

Would put his phone of selective notifications or Do Not Disturb from time to time until the government comes knocking

Human stuff:

Between 28 to 32 years old. Would have gone to school for English literature and publishing up to Masters, getting a job at a publishing company with the dream of one day being published himself.

Lives the London hustle life in a fancy flat, but is very Montgomery Ricky “you want a garden but you got a balcony” coded as he had grown up in a suburban house with his family and yearns for that quiet life again but believes he needs to be in the city in order to get somewhere.

Unlike in Gangsta AU, the brothers are actually related in my head and heart ToT. All raised by their mummsy. Dylan and Alasdair different dad from Arthur, but its the mom’s side that counts as we all know

loser failure bisexual of course

Cant think of anything else rn, so i’ll end it here by saying he would use reading glasses by like age 25 lol

#hetalia #arthur kirkland #hws england #hetalia england #hetalia headcanons #beyart #beylific #um happy birthday england ig #lowkey hate these drawings LMAO #i lov him god i hate it here #i can never draw #end of statement #lol #just made the horrible realization im lowkey a british historian in the english and welsh sense fml #wait also do yall think he looks like Sealand in that first pic? it wasnt intentional but 😭

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