#i have not seen my therapist in over a month and i dont wanna get a new one and i wanna cry and everythign is going BASdddlyyyy

[lovelyrockstar]

i love to draw ocs during school while having a shit ass day. makes me feel good. but???? im still having a shit ass day and i still feel bad????? jot like. "oh i did something now i feel bad" like "oh i feel terrible physically and mentally and im scared whats gonna happen next"

venting in tags a little bit kind of ihhuuh

[dw-writes]

Once Bitten, Twice Angry - Miguel O'Hara x Anti Hero!Reader

So. This isnt planned to be a fic - in fact Im writing it on my phone (which is something I NEVER do). But the idea came to me today and its itching the inside of my skull so I decided to write it down. Its silly - just an thought experiment to get the Across the Spiderverse brain worms out.

This isnt intended to be a romantic fic, either. At the point of writing this author blurb, i dont even know how Miguel fits into it beyond the main idea of him being venomous.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy! Let me know what you think

This isnt edited, and was typed out pretty quickly on a phone. I apologize ;;

WARNINGS: Swearing; Violence

"I bet you're wondering what I'm doing here." The bank robber - his name was Ryan, you remembered, and he was a pretty decent guy, just down on his luck too many times - nodded and mumbled behind the collect of irridecent that coated his mouth. You propped your foot on the side of another robber - Julian, Julius, Juli-something, he never really talked that much to you - as he tried to squirm towards his fallen weapon. "It's weird, right?" you mused, "One day, I'm the Black Cat, Nueva York's greatest burglar, the next I'm--" you cut yourself off as you hooked a foot around Juli-such-and-such's hip and tossed him across the bank floor. He released a muffled shout.

"Okay, so, what do you think of Moon Weaver?" you asked, "Too much?"

"Ain't there a Moon Knight?" someone in the bank quipped.

You twisted around, snapping your fingers down on your new, and very much stolen, web shooter. The man crumbled back against a cabinet. He was a banker, and annoying during robberies.

"I didn't ask you? I still don't know if you're gonna be saved by me yet," you replied. You turned back to Ryan. "No Moon Weaver?" you asked.

He shook his head.

"Damn," you sighed, "Anyway, I was telling this to my therapist up on the seventh floor - you should see her by the way, she's great - and we were going over how this started, but since you so rudely interrupted my therapy session, you get to hear it." You crouched in front of him. "Don't worry, you're not gonna remember a thing anyway. I'll make sure of it."

Ryan didn't reply.

You stood back up. "So, let's start at the beginning." You waved your hand as you paced away to another bank robber, kneeling to scoop up his limp ankle. "Remember that heist I was doing a few months ago? Priceless heirloom, lots of money, you know how it is. I was on the job, like normal, when that fucking Spiderman shows up." You dropped the man's ankle and crouched in front of Ryan again. "Have you ever seen him without his mask? He's kinda hot, but in that infuriating "I really wanna punch you" kinda way?"

Ryan merely stared at you. He wasn't a very good audience.

You huffed. "Anyway. He showed up, we did the whole song and dance - the chase, the quips, the obvious flirting with a good layer of sexual tension - and I give him the slip." You frowned at your own memory of that night, planting your fists on your hips. "Except, I didn't. He caught me around the corner, and we went down, grappling. I think I hit him a little too hard in a place that I shouldn't've - that's rude in a fight, you know - because he yelled and suddenly bit my shoulder." You turned back around. "He bit me! Like a four year old!"

You thought Ryan mumbled something that sounded like, "Seriously?" but it was too hard to make out.

So, you replied with, "Yeah! And I went home, and I started feeling weird." Then, you crouched again, your fingers dancing over your knees. "And you know how we all kinda know that he's a weird little freak that's, like, part spider, or werewolf, or vampire, or something freaky? Yeah, I think whatever it is gave me powers," you whispered.

Ryan's eyes went wide.

You shrugged and stood, cupping your fingers around his head. "Yeah, it was weird. And now, here we are!" Your fingers tickled as a surge of electricity arched away from them and through his skull. "Not that you'll remember it," you mumbled.

The robber thrashed as you stepped away, then slumped to the ground. You watch him for a moment, frowning, waiting to make sure he was still breathing. When he groaned, you stepped back.

Then, you snapped your fingers, turning around to face the whole group of thieves you had piled in a corner. "Oh, what about Night Spider? That's pretty cool!" you asked.

"It's pretty," came a delayed reply. You looked over your shoulder. It was a customer, one of the few that was still curled up on the floor.

You smiled, and bowed at the waist. "Why thank you," you preened, standing, and waving your arm towards the door, "What're you all still waiting around here for? Get outta here!" You watched as the customers scrambled to their feet. "And tell the cops it was Night Spider that helped you!" You backed away, eyeing an exit you normally took to escape a bank with a similar layout. "Not Spiderman."

You bolted as the cops rushed into the building.

Miguel watched from atop the roof across the street, an annoyed scowl etched deep into his face. He knew he shouldn't have bitten you that night - but how could he have known you'd have such a reaction?!

And now, you went from being a pain in his side to a fucking problem.

He pinched the bridge of his nose and groaned, swearing under his breath.

Lyla would never let him live it down.

[cody-apexart]

Day 10

So i talked to my therapist and another Vietnamese person at the cultural meet up a couple days ago about the abortion horror movie-- they havn't seen it, but it sounds like its less about the topic of abortion and more about the Vietnamese culture and different religious view points around death, killing things, and karma. interesting ! anyway, I cried in therapy and then bought myself some yanyans and soju on the walk home. so fun to get a lil treat! like i felt good when i left, did some good thought exercises, or visualization therapy, whatever you wanna call it, but as i walked through the privately owned waterfront development that I had watched the sunset in the night before, back across the bridge to my side of the canal I was rly like 'holy shit fuck this world.' In NY i work in the building associated with Domino Park in Williamsburg, part of my salary is funded directly by the developers. This is a job I wouldn't be able to have in my own neighborhood, because if i was taking payment from the developers causing displacement in my own neighborhood, i think a lot of the people i advocate and organize with would stop fucking with me or taking me seriously. I feel pretty bad about it, like why is it okay I work a job in Williamsburg, where i dont live, that I would never work in my hometown of Flushing? That is to say that making me go to therapy in the private waterfront mega development is like a cruel joke. like, the first thing i clocked when I came here was these six huge towers on the other side of the canal, and now u send me to cry about my feelings there?? maybe i'm a little too sensitive to the impacts of luxury waterfront development, because as you may be able to tell, advocacy around displacement and waterfront development actually consumes all my free time. also btw, the therapist confirmed the waterfront access is privately owned, as I assumed. Every time i cross over the canal it takes all my energy to not climb down this ladder under the bridge. I need to keep reminding myself i am a stranger in a strange land and should probs not trespass. but if i were in my own neighborhood, i wouldn't think twice.

the motorbike food tour tonight was fun. in my art practice i give a lot of tours, but always forget i'm a tour guide, until i tell someone about what I do and they're like "so you're a tour guide?" Me and my student tour guide vibed about the pains of touring people around. it was a fun experience, and funny to see how him and his other tour guide co-workers kinda just circle around each other with diff tourists throughout the evening-- all the tours start at the same time and go to the same places. he said they go to the same places every night, he's been eating the same food with tourist 3-4 times a week every week for 3 months since hes had this job. if i were a local i would probably find this method of touring incredibly annoying. He took me to the Thích Quảng Đức statue commemorating the monk that burned alive in the street advocating for religious freedom. He noted that the photos of the event that were distributed globally in the 1960's edit out the gas canister because it makes it look more profound and like he acted alone. You can see the bad 1960's photoshop blur in the left side of the image under the car tier. super interesting note on propaganda. Im glad I didn't come here without a guide, i would not have known that. I asked if this act of protest was effective, and if it worked to get what the Buddhist community wanted-- he said it got global eyes on the issue due to the distribution of the images. I mentioned to him that an american guy burned himself alive on the supreme court steps because of climate change last year, he was very surprised that there was basically no media coverage of that and he had not heard about it.

The tour groups kept circling around one another when we arrived at a public housing complex. we were basically walking through the projects taking photos, like honestly not a nice thing to be making a spectacle out of the people living in public housing projects. all these tour groups climbed 2-3 flights of stairs and walk around these peoples front doors, it happens every night. super obnoxious tbh. perhaps regrettably, I couldn't help but snap some pics, the lanterns were still up from the tet holiday, and the lighting was just right. These types of developments are what the book im reading is about, titled "building socialism: the afterlife of east german architecture in urban vietnam". I shared a photo of the cover before, these buildings look almost identical.

He pointed out the water tower and then we left.

[tranquil1es]

you knew my entire life story. you knew all the trauma and the pain, the abandonment, my biggest fears. you took advantage of it. you met me when i was vulnerable. became my therapist. i trusted you. it just clicked from the very first moment. which it never does for me, with anyone. we grew really close. learned more and more about esch other throughout time. i should have seen new years as the biggest warning sign of them all. intentionally playing with my feeligs. just for fun. hurting me. just for fun. just seeing how far you could go. not because you actually wanted to, bit just for fun. i forgave. ypu betrayed my trust really badly and my trust in you was higher than in anyone else, but i forgave you. and after meeting on my birthday, the love bombing started. i didnt even realize it. i was oblivious to it. this is how its supposed to be, no? i shouldve payed closer attention to the weeks afterwards. how your entire behavior changed. i shouldve payed more attention to the details over time when we were friends. having had a phase where you play with girls feelings for fun for your own amusement just to drop them afterwards. but that was long in the past right? i mean, you promised that, and your promises hold value, right? i was a delusional little puppy following along anything. wouldve done anything for you, wouldve done anything you asked for. didnt ask for anything back in return. busy? oh yea, i get that, your days are packed. energy‘s low. busy again? no problem, i told you, no need to feel bad about it!!

„theres gonna be more time from now on“

im so happy, so excited

„sorry i dont really feel like doing anything today, im too mentally drained“

„oh okay, no problem!“

„we can play a game of val or 2 before bed“

„oh my god YES ofcourse im omw“

„today ill be pretty busy so i wont be messaging much“

„and thats okay, have a lovely day anyways and just update me whenever!“

„im gonna be off school all day tomorrow“

„omg yay“

„oh but i forgot to tell you, i want that day all to myself. phone on dnd, no family, no friends, no you, just me“

„oh okay, just let me know whenever you feel better“

„i got my shift plan for next month and can manage to come visit again next month!!“

„already?“

„i mean, yea, its gonna have been over a month by then and i have the financial needs, quality time irl and seeing each other regularly is very important no“

„im gonma be very busy around that time and wont have much time to spend with you, id rather we prolong it till april or may when im more free“

„but i just wanna see you, i dont mind only actually seeing you for maybe 2 hours a day while youre home before bed, i dont mind youll be exhausted, i dont need much i wont be a bother, i just wanna ve there, its so much better than waiting months when you live hours away and the means are there“

„i promise i wont be a bother, ill sit there quietly and just eat dinner next to you and leave you be when you feel too exhausted, i just wanna see you“

„you do realize once you go back home youll get allll of my freetime, right? when doing my assignments i want to sit on call with you just so we can enjoy esch others company“

„video calls, ill set everything up for it“ yet the only one who turned on their cam every single time was me

its weird how the moment you broke up you suddenly had all the time in the world to queue as many games as you want and do whatever

[emonaculate]

Streamer Eren Headcanon pt 2

`❥ AU: Modern!AU

`❥ Genre: Fluff

`❥ Pairing: Streamer!Eren x Black!Reader

`❥ Warnings Include: Profanity, Established relationship, Eren is a dork

`❥ Author Note: You guys loved the first one so much I decided to do it again. Sorry if it isn't as good as the first one, I'm working on other projects at the same time

Eren met you during college and was instantly smitten

You were a foreign student studying abroad

He spent months trying to learn English just to properly talk to you

You finally cave in and go on dates with him because slfkssrlw how could you not when he's that sweet

Having said that, when you're frustrated whilst he streams, to check on you he'll switch over to English.

"Hey pretty girl whats wrong?"

"I can't find the letters for my cross word."

"....Aha lemme see."

He is trying his hardest not to laugh at your cute little scrunched up face as he helps you find the word.

During his charity streams, by popular vote, he lets you do his make up

Despite the stream being 24 hrs long people continue to watch because the interactions are too cute.

" 'Ren stay still."

"It feels moist."

"Never say that again."

"Wait. Babe. I want the thingy on my eyes."

"Thingy?"

"Yeah the sharp shit and the stuff on my lashes."

"Its called wing liner and mascara, Eren."

"Yeah that shit."

"Don't swear. Kids are watching."

"Man fuck them-"

"Yeager."

"....Ahem... sorry."

He is definitely the baddest bitch after you finish <3

Kept the make up on even after the stream finished

He may be a COD player but he does not have toxic masculinity

LOVES how he looks when pampered and whilst he'll never go out of his way to do make up or use your products; if you ever offer he's down

"What that's shit on your face?"

"It's an Indian face mask."

"It looks like throw up."

"Do you wanna try it?"

"Yes."

Once talked shit about braids not hurting that bad.

So the only natural solution was to make a bet

You styled his beautiful long hair into nice and neat cornrows (if you can't braid, take him to the africans)

He couldn't even sit through the procedure, literally got up and left midway through

"Fuck no. I like pain as much as the next guy but hell no."

"Aw baby what wrong? I thought it wasn't that bad."

Went on stream the next day to talk about the experience and why he wouldn't wish that on anyone.

Everyone can tell that your relationship is serious when you accidentally broke his PS5

Like he gets absolutely livid and wants to do nothing more than yell at you

But after seeing your teary eyed expression and your broken apologies in German

He just accepts it and steps completely out of the room to keep from blowing up on you.

It takes a few days and even though you feel completely like shit, you dont bother him

He finally comes around and just holds you tightly

No words or anything

His gesture is enough to let you know he forgives you.

He gets a new one immediately and is more careful when it comes to letting you mess with alone though lmao

Decides to do the little draw my life video and moves people to tears without trying

He thought his trauma was normal pfft

While that gets to people, what really affects his audience is when he get to how you make him feel

"If I can describe Y/n with one word, I'd have to say sunshine. You know that feeling when you've seen nothing but depressing rainstorms for months at a time but just that one day, the sun pokes out and shows that the world isn't so gloomy and bad. It's actually quite beautiful. The sun manages to make those sad raindrops look like diamonds. Thats Y/n to me. She makes the days where I feel at my worst better in every way. "

Eren suffers from a couple mental illnesses which is why he donates to their respected charities

He suffers from ADHD, Depression, and Anger issues.

Now you can't just magically make all of his issues go away but you being around does soothe him in a special way

Not many people can do that and LOTS have tried

But you just manage to get him in ways he cant explain

Even the videos with all of his friends involved, his focus on you

Fans can tell when you guys are not together during streams

Eren's temper is a lot shorter and he pops off quickly.

And of course he just so happens to play "getting over it"

This is one of those times he gets cancelled

Coochie-manz63: wow ur trash

"You're literally someone who hides behind a fucking screen to talk shit but I know if I was in front of you; there would be no exchange because if you so much looked at me wrong, I would have beaten your ass into fucking next year, you dyslexic fucking waste of space. Learn how to goddamn spell before you try to talk shit again."

IloveYEAGGGGER23: Damn..

You ended up being the one to clean up his mess, yet again

"Eren is very sorry for his actions, He understands how his words can be hurtful to others.. Right babe?"

"Huh? Oh um yeah.. My bad ig."

After the apology video, you give Eren one of your famous lectures.

"Eren you can't treat others like that just because you get a little upset. Remember what your therapist said about controlling your temper. You can't just do it when I'm around, you have to do it all the time.

Now Eren loves you to pieces but your lectures just do not help his ADHD mind.

So to shut you up, he does the only thing he knows how

Takes your breath and thoughts away with his passionate kisses.

His pattern is always the same

He pretends to listen, nodding occasionally, stands up and moves closer to you.

Grabs your jaw gently and tips your head back before capturing your lips into a sheering kiss that always leaves you breathless

"What were we talking about?"

"We were just going to get some food."

You're just as weak for Eren as he is for you <3

[koigoldfish]

「 JUJUTSU KAISEN CHARACTERS AS FRANK JAMES’ MBTI COMEDY SKETCHES : AT THE THERAPIST 」

⤷ . AUTHOR’S NOTE: i actually have assignments to do but i like procrastinating. it was kind of hard doing this one. anyway, here’s a cup of türk kahvesi~

⤷ . WARNING(S): check my pinned before following me :)

GOJOU SATORU: “i’m telling you, i don’t belong in therapy. i’m just here to figure out how to deal with all the nutjobs in my life who actually need it.”

────────────────────────

ZENIN MAI: “i tried that breathing exercise and it worked for a second, but i still ended up punching a hole in the wall. so overall, pretty useless suggestion if you ask me.”

────────────────────────

ITADORI YUUJI: “are you sure you wanna hear about this? seriously, it’s sad. [ takes a box of tissue and gives it to the therapist ] just stop me if i start bumming you out too much, okay?”

────────────────────────

MEI MEI: “okay, so how many sessions do you think it’ll be until you fix all of my psychological problems? because i’d really like to get this done and over with by the end of the month.”

────────────────────────

NANAMI KENTO: “before we get started, i’ve just gotta say, your paperwork process here is so repetitive. i answered the same question on like, five different documents. you’ve really gotta streamline.”

────────────────────────

KUGISAKI NOBARA: “the problem is not me over-functioning. the problem is all the idiots around me under-functioning.”

────────────────────────

NAOYA ZENIN: “i’m joking when i say that ‘life is excruciating exercise in futile misery and that i can’t stand humanity’. get a sense of humour, jeez.”

────────────────────────

IEIRI SHOKO: “i know we only have 50 minutes, but i have a lot of ground to cover. so, i wrote everything down in my notes app. [ takes out phone and begins scrolling ] let me just give you a quick rundown. all right, there’s the weird dream i had on tuesday night. it’s gonna be uncomfortable so i apologise in advance.”

────────────────────────

RYOMEN SUKUNA: “look, i’m only here because my girlfriend says i won’t “open up”, whatever that means. sounds like some hippy shit to me.”

────────────────────────

MIWA KASUMI: “i suppose it all started in third grade, when i lost a tooth, and put it under my pillow without telling my parents. in the morning, the tooth was still there, and there was no money to be found. since then, the very fabric of reality has become worn and frayed, like an old cardigan sweater in the back of the closet.”

────────────────────────

FUSHIGURO TOJI: “i’m trying to find the beauty in life. but like, have you seen life? it sucks.”

────────────────────────

ZENIN MAKI: “whoa, whoa, whoa, don’t ask me what i think i should do. just give me the right answer, and tell me what to do!”

────────────────────────

PANDA: “okay, i know he doesn’t come across as great in that story, but please dont blame all my problems on my dad. yaga is a really nice man, and he’s trying his best, okay?”

────────────────────────

NISHIMIYA MOMO: “how does that make me feel? oh, you know, actually i saved the perfect meme for this. hold on one second [ takes out her phone but couldn’t find the meme in the end ] crap, i can’t find it. it was good, but it was like … it’s gone, you had to be there.”

────────────────────────

TOUDOU AOI: “i am not spending money to fill a void, okay? yes, this shirt was 90 dollars but it was 75% off. it would’ve been irresponsible to not buy it. plus, it made me happy.”

────────────────────────

IJICHI KIYOTAKA: “i’m not depressed. could a depressed person get up, go to work, and deal with everyone else’s problems, all day, every day, until you’re nearly crushed by the collective weight of it all? i don’t think so.”

reblogs are appreciated! ✦

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Soulmarks, Part 9

First part

Previous

~~~

She breathed out as she broke Mr. Pigeon’s whistle for the 21st time.

“God, when will Hawkmoth show up again? We haven’t seen him in ages,” complained Marinette as she caught the butterfly. She waved it off vaguely.

“It’s almost like he doesn’t want us to beat him,” complained Adrien, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Right?”

Tim laughed over the comms. “Sucks that you guys can’t track the butterflies.”

The heroes looked at each other in silence for a long time.

“You… you have tried to track the akumas, right?”

“Well…” Began Adrien.

“About that…” Continued Marinette.

Tim sighed.

~

He looked up from the computer as she took a seat beside him and raised his eyebrows slightly. “Hey.”

“Hi,” she mumbled, sipping at her coffee cup. She started pulling up tabs on a different screen.

He gave a grin. “You didn’t get me any?”

“Dick said you’re cut off.”

He sighed. Man, he’d been hoping that she hadn’t known. Now how was he supposed to stay up when he’d been expressly told to go to sleep?

“I don’t get that. You drink more than me. You should be banned, too.”

She shrugged. “I can portal out and get some if I want. You can’t. You’re easier to control.”

Damn it. That made sense.

He rested his head back against the chair and crossed his arms. “This is stupid.”

“Mmm,” she hummed, still clicking away at the computer.

He huffed at her apparent disinterest in his struggles. He looked at her screen to see what had captivated her attention and raised his eyebrows. “If you needed a map of Gotham you could’ve just looked it up on your phone.”

“Not what I was doing.” She sighed. “I’m trying to figure out where Joker would be hiding. He’s super white. You’d think someone’d see him by now and post him on twitter.”

He shook his head. “Not if he killed everyone he saw.”

“But he hasn’t done that. There hasn’t been any major shootings, no mysterious missing camera footage, nothing.” She crumpled the now empty coffee cup in her hands. “It’s like he just... disappeared.”

He scooted his wheely chair closer to her and frowned as he looked at the files she was searching through over her shoulder. She was, shockingly, right. Not only had Joker not been implicated for any crimes, the city had been devoid of pretty much everything major since he’d been gone. No bank robberies, no shoutouts, nothing. It was as if every major criminal had agreed to take the month off.

“Gotham is too quiet,” he whispered.

She nodded grimly.

~

Marinette sighed lightly as she stepped into the Batcave and found Tim zombie-ing around. She caught his arm before he could bring another cup of coffee to his lips.

“When was the last time you slept?”

He mumbled something that might have been ‘never’.

She shook her head. “I know finding Joker is important, but you have to sleep more.”

He groaned.

She tried to pull the mug away from him.

He didn’t let go, hooking his legs around his swivel chair. She pulled again and cursed when this only succeeded in making him roll a few centimeters.

She narrowed her eyes and started dragging him around the Batcave by his mug. Eventually he’d have to give up or his body would give out. She could wait. She was hopped up on caffeine and it was only midday in France. She could outlast him.

Dick walked in, twirling his escrima sticks like batons. He stopped short as he spotted the heroine dragging her soulmate around the Batcave while he hung off of her.

“Uh…?”

“DONT YOU FUCKING JUDGE ME, DICK.”

He raised his hands in a kind of ‘okay, damn, don’t hurt me’ fashion and started backing away slowly.

“Diiiiiick, help meeeeeeee,” begged Tim.

Dick hesitated, his eyes flickering between both of them, before he apparently decided that it would be better to just fall to his doom than choose a side. He hopped over the nearest railing and disappeared.

Marinette blinked. “Did he just… die...?”

“I’m fine!” He yelled from somewhere in the cave.

“Oooookaaaaay… what is wrong with this family?” She whispered.

“One day you’ll be one of us, so you’re insulting future you right now,” Tim teased quietly, only to whine as she managed to finally kick the chair away from him.

She hooked his arm around her shoulders and bore most of his weight as she began dragging him up to his room. “Who says we’re going to get married?”

“Hopefully you, one day, but if you don’t there’s no way Bruce wouldn’t adopt you.”

She rolled her eyes. “You need to sleep.”

“No…”

“Yes.”

She pushed open the door to his room and raised her eyebrows at the spotlessness. She had expected it to be covered in a fine layer of dust with how little he used it, but she supposed that Alfred would never let the mansion fall into even slight disrepair.

He sighed and attempted to lean away from her. She probably would have actually fallen if she hadn’t been prepared for some kind of retaliation but, as it was, she still ended up having to grab the doorframe to stop them from hitting the floor.

He pouted. “I don’t wanna sleep.”

“Okay, fine, give me one good reason why I shouldn’t make you sleep,” she said, dropping him on the bed.

She crossed her arms over her chest as he considered the question.

He couldn’t seem to meet her eyes as he mumbled his answer: “Nightmares.”

Marinette had been prepared to immediately shut him down, her mouth halfway open, but then she snapped it shut.

That was actually a very good reason. Huh.

What was she supposed to say? She wasn’t his therapist! She was fourteen! Give her a break!

She watched him pull his pillow to his chest and bury his face in it. There was a tiny pang in her chest.

Even if she wasn’t his therapist, she still wanted to help…

She hesitantly sat down on the edge of the bed and took his hand. He stiffened slightly and looked up at her with a tiny, somewhat confused, frown playing across his lips. She gave him an awkward smile in return.

“You’re going to pass out no matter what, but… I’ll stay here and make sure you don’t have any nightmares, okay? I promise.”

He squeezed her hand a little bit to say he understood and settled into the blankets. After a bit, he gave a short laugh.

“What’s so funny?”

“You say ‘okay’ a lot when you don’t know what to do,” he teased quietly.

She blinked. “Oka --?”

He cut her off with his laughter and her face reddened.

“That’s it! I’m leaving!” She joked, only to feel his grip tighten on her hand. 

“Don’t go. Please.”

She looked at his wide eyes and felt herself blush harder. “I was kidding, I made a promise. Besides, I don’t think you’d sleep if I left.”

His grip slackened a little bit.

“Actually… my body kinda gave up when I laid down here and now it won’t let me get up.”

She nodded slightly. “Yeah, they do that when you do something stupid and then lay down. They’re pretty good at making sure you don’t overexert yourself.”

He huffed. “Stupid human limitations.”

Marinette grinned and ran her thumb along the back of his hand. “Awful, really.”

He gave a short hum of agreement before closing his eyes. After a bit, she felt his grip slacken on her hand.

She pulled the blanket over him properly and pressed a kiss to his forehead.

Tim smiled in his sleep.

~~~

Next part

Taglist

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[mingot-studios]

Things currently polluting my mind (will be added to as i think of things)

 How bad the Star vs. Finale was, and weather i should even bother trying to watch the show again at this point

The fact that the next JoJolion chapter is coming out soon and I STILL haven’t read 107 with my mom even though I’ve already read it

Not being caught up on One Piece and having 0 IDEA of whats happening at this poin as well starting to flaws with the series (racism, transphobia, and homophobia) that i knew was there but chose to ignore and weather it should hinder my relationship with the series. Also wanting to murder Oda for demoting Franky to ‘Pervy Grandma’ (srsly wtf oda)

Upset Infinity Train was cancelled even though i never watched it, and wonder why the fans cry for it to come is suddenly not happening?

The fact i’m going to be returning to in person schooling which is my personal HELL

my brother leaving for college upstate (Me and my brother have never really been that close, we fight alot but I cant imagine life without him)

The fact that my procrastination has gotten so bad that I nearly had to retake PE, World History, and English

The Owl House coming back on the 12th but i had downloaded the first 2 episodes but haven’t watched them and debating if i should, also having a meltdown  over Disney screwing the show over and having its third be 3 or 4 (i cant remember) 44-minute specials

The fact that me and brother STILL haven’t finished our Yume 2kki Let’s Play

I haven’t been watching anime regularly with my mom

I haven’t posted anything to my DeviantArt or YouTube in months

I have so much energy right now but no outlets

I still haven’t tried out my drawing pad i got for my birthday last year

I have so many drawing ideas but my spiral sketchpad is filled up and I have yet to get a new one

Ive many intricit and detailed story ideas that i know im gonna forget if i dont write them down bu due my procrastination i haven’t done so im prolly gonna lose everything

The fact Thurston Waffles hasn’t posted anything since late April as well as the fact that he’s got Kidney problems

So many ideas for videos but I only have WindowsMovieMaker and the HumbleBundle my mom got me idk YEARS ago won’t install

I’m gonna be 17 at the end of September, which i only have until next June before I graduate High school, have to give up my Chromebook, start thinking about college and getting a job, possibly moving out and living on my own, the knowledge that my parents are in their late 50′s and early 60′s so hey might be gone sooner than most parents and I dont know how to function without my parents doing everything for me

These weird tingles ive been getting in my body for he pas couple days

The fact that im not gonna a kid soon and im gonna have to grow and stop doing whatever i want whenever i want and i’m gonna never accomplish my dream of creating a successful cartoon and will probably end up at a dead end job I HATE just to make ends meet and eventually dying alone because I dont wanna be in a relationship or have kids

Everything is too overwhelming. The light, the sound, my thoughts, its all too much. I wanna curl up into a tiny ball and disappear from this awful experience called life

Capitalism

i hate being so passionately when i’m upset, everyone else is calm but i have meltdowns and freaks outs over things i shouldn’t even care about or are miniscule (Comes with being autistic i guess)

I have 0 patience and i hate it

I’m starting to regress back to being a childish brat after all the progress i’ve made

i’m constantly surrounded by either criticism or praise that contradict each other so i dont know what to believe about myself

the fact that i have so many great story ideas but i cant write a cohernt thought with proper grammer or sytax or spelling o save my life, nor the art skill or the patience or the tech to draw comics

i haven seen my therapist in days and i need help but i know im not actually gonna change 

having gender panic

I have no in person friends and ive forgotten how to interact with people

ive become a noodle limbed nerd

Ive gotten super skinny

I want someone o break through my shell and help me change bu I know thats just a fantasy and im the only one who can do that but im too lazy to put effort into it

everything i used to enjoy suddenly feels tedious monotonous repetitive and uninteresting

I feel trapped and scraed 

The fact after being bulied so much the only way i can really assert myself is to get violent and angry because they would want me breakdown and cry

I have this image in my head of who i want to be; And badass that people including adults, are scared of and know not to fuck with me or they’ll get hurt (Basically Jotaro, bu I’ve had this image since before i even knew what jojo was) And the fact I KNOW that i’s a pointless endever and that i only dig my own grave when i get mad but its like ingrained Branded into my my psyche so im always going to larp that vision of myself but not get anywhere and only regress further

I want to address my problems and change but I never do and stay static and regress

I cant take crticisim even though i know its true

The reason im so scared of writing fanfiction is because i know its gonna be a mess despite what i think is a great story and people will end up mocking it and what little self confidence i have will shatter

Star Vs wasted potential

the fact that I dont know where to take the whole “Rubi dies at the  end of he first season but comes back o life except she’s not actually she’s just a walking meat sack containing an anchint eldritch god that will, sooner or later, burst out of her and destroy her body, and she’s fighting for control of her ow body due to Skarlotus trying to devor her soul and Data’s medience is only delaying the inevitable” storyline of my concept cartoon, The Crypto Club

I have an AMAZING idea for an Invader Zim storyline that has fascism, rascism, mass genocide, child soldiers, political intrigue, propaganda, baiscally space hitler and more (okay that came out sound REALLY bad, but NONE of it painted as good!) It also involves Zim and Dib coming together to stop an even bigger threat and there is a really ironic ending that brings my OC GA83′s story full circle

[irishvampireboy]

Okay this episode was, so fucking good. Like fuck man!!!

Sam and Bucks fight kmart cap A+++ good fight boys ya done good

Sam and Isaiah talking about his trauma and what was done to him, terribly sad and emotional both fellas knocked that scene so far out of the park

Bucky fuckin with Zemo's head and handing him over to the Dora (and getting his nickname back from Ayo AND calling in a favor for Sam) 100% good shit

Sam fixin the nets with his nephews and callin in favors from his community, and having them respond IN FULL cuz that community is full of love and support

Bucky showing up and just "boom moved your shit for you you're welcome" and sam AND sarah being like 👀👀👀

Bucky and Sarah being ADORABLE and sam being GRUMPY ABOUT IT = the best thing I've ever seen

"I'm right handed"

THE ENTIRE BOAT FIXING MONTAGE

Sam "making" bucky stay, and him waking up on the couch to see Sarah's boys play fighting with the sheild, and being happy, my heart was happy

Sarah telling them both to get off the boat cuz they're fuckin shit up now, and both of them being like, Yes ma'am absolutely, have a wonderful day

THEY'RE TRAINING TOGETHER (very lightly....FOR NOW)

Sam being a better fucking therapist in ONE GODDAMN CONVERSATION than six months with his actual doctor 🙃🙃🙃 (but Bucky being so grateful and IMMEDIATELY telling sam the truth about his nightmares cuz he TRUSTS him 😌😌😌)

THEY HELD HANDS FOR SO LONG LIKE BOYS WAS THAT NECESSARY??? I MEAN I THINK IT WAS BUT LIKE.... DAMN OKAY

Them parting ways, both smiling, with Bucky's promise to be there whenever sam calls. Bless.

Sam and Sarah's talk about keeping the boat, because it's their past, and they want to keep it alive, i love them!!!!!! SO MUCH!!

SAM'S TRAINING MONTAGE (((I AM LOOKING RESPECTFULLY))) the boys chasing him and the yelled "get him AJ" was so damn cute

What the FUCK is Sharon up to??? I dont even wanna speculate cuz i wanna be surprised!!!!

Oh and also TORRES TORRES TORRES he's adorable and helpful and sweet and Sam's "keep 'em" about the wings i almost screamed!!!!!!

Also, karli i love you but you gotta chill baby girl, you don't wanna hurt those people. She's turning but i still like her a lot. It might be the freckles, i find them very endearing and also distracting cuz i love freckles, but still, DONT BLOW PEOPLE UP

I think was definitely my fave ep so far!!!!

[mocksyoucondescendingly]

.

[iwakurodai]

Angel || Richie Tozier

hello! if this one isn’t good then you can leave me. I haven’t had a good streak with writing in so long. The ending is probably really bad but be gentle, I didn’t know how to continue this let alone end it so the ending seems a bit rushed/way too short! Anyways! I hope you enjoy this imagine to kick off my return to eggytozier

soulmate au where you feel the  pain of your destined lover but dont get the wounds/bruises. 

requested? nah, just had an idea

warnings? suicide, car wrecks, knives, cursing, death, dead parents, pain, blood, soulmates, bad endings, homophobic slur, and missing children

pairing? Richie Tozier x reader, and a bit of platonic!bill x reader

You met your soulmate when you were only five. 

Walking into preschool--hand gripped so very tightly onto your parent’s finger--you stopped at the door way as they spoke to your new teacher. Looking around, your eyes watch the kids chasing each other and knocking stuff over. Your eyes met a small boy that was playing alone, pretending to make food at the play kitchen way across the room. You were about to leave your parents when the teacher kneeled in front of you, distracting you and you forgot about the boy as she introduced herself to you. 

Farther along in the day, at recess, you were about to join the boy from before on the swing set until he jumped off and landed wrong. You felt nothing but searing pain in your ankle and you fell to the ground, sobbing, unaware of the boy screeching just a couple yards from you. You found out who he was when you both were carried to the nurses office by the teachers monitoring you. 

His name was Taylor James. He was a little blonde boy who spoke a little too quiet and laughed a little too loud. He had a strong interest in cooking after growing up with a chef as a father. He had a stutter and a lisp but you didn’t see the problem.

You two were only five, but since that point of meeting, you two were inseparable. 

As years went by, your parents and his became best friends. Taking mementos of you two to look back on when you got married. You two grew up together, not hiding a single thing. Well, it was hard to hide something when you both could feel something was wrong. 

Taylor was as quiet as he was in preschool and he was just as sensitive. Which caused him to become an easy target for bullying. You despised the bullies. Every time you saw them you couldn’t help but shout insults and jokes, hoping that they would feel what they did to Taylor. You knew that it wasn’t right but you didn’t care. All that mattered was Taylor being happy. 

But, you would never have been prepared for when the accident happened. 

You were 10, only five years were spent with Taylor. He was on his way to your house for Easter. You were helping your mother color some eggs when you suddenly dropped to the floor, screaming as if you were being murdered. Tears came out of your eyes like a river, you were barely breathing. A screech coming out of your mouth whenever you could get it out until nothing would come out. 

You felt as if your soul had been ripped in two, holding onto each other with thin strings. Your body was cold, freezing to the touch. Your nails digging into your arms but you didn’t feel a single thing. Your whole mind and body were numb, other than the feeling of your whole being, being put through a paper shredder. 

It wasn’t until you were sitting against your mother chest, still sobbing, that your dad came home. He had tears in his eyes, his hands were shaking. 

Your dad was coming home from buying some candy for you and Taylor when he saw a familiar car fly, headfirst, into a semi truck. He pulled over and ran to the scene, pulling out a phone and calling 911. He was telling the operator where he was when he was stopped cold at the sight of Mr. and Mrs. James, barely even recognizable. Your dad checked the back and was horrified to see little Taylor with a piece of shrapnel lodged into his chest. 

Your dad fled, rushing to you as he realized what would happen. He had only read about soulmates dying, but never did he think he--or anyone he knew--would witness it himself. You didn’t feel a thing of the crash. Taylor died on impact. But the feeling of your other half being ripped from life had scarred you to the core. 

You went silent, your mouth never opened other than to eat and drink. The trauma of losing someone so close to you had scraped your ability to find the use in talking. Your parents became scared, signing you up for a therapist. 

You were only with that therapist for barely half a year before they decided that a change of scenery was better for your health. With that suggestion, you and your family packed up and left your hometown. Driving as far as the family’s minivan could take you. 

Which was the small, secluded town of Derry, Maine. 

You didn’t go to school until the next year, your parents making sure that all the teachers knew of your problem and wouldn’t force you to do anything. 

You weren’t mad or sad or even happy that you had moved. You were just... surviving. You didn’t feel like you needed to feel anything, so you didn’t. In the short year of learning at Derry Middle School, you didn’t make any friends and only gained the attention of Greta Bowie. She took advantage of every time you were alone to bully you. She wanted to tip you over the edge and cause a breakdown. She had found out about your soulmate dying and was making up different scenarios of what could have happened. 

“Your little soulmate killed himself because you’re such a fucking disgrace of a human he didn’t want to be with you, didn’t he?” 

You pretended to not hear it. 

You also gained the attention of a kid named Bill Denbrough. He had a stutter and it reminded you, almost too much, of Taylor. He tried his best to make you comfortable: helping you with work when you seemed to not understand, giving you tips about avoiding Greta and Henry Bowers (who you hadn’t met but made a note of staying away from), and even inviting you to hang out with his friends. You always denied, you didn’t wanna damper their fun. 

Bill always shrugged, though, promising to make plans to hang out alone. You always gave him a small smile in response and a pat on the shoulder. You were scared of getting close to him. 

It was only a month after meeting Bill that you felt something strange. 

You were walking down the hallway, being called to the counselor’s office for your daily meeting, when you felt a strong sense of pain in your stomach. As if you’d been punched. You froze in the middle of the hallway, your mind racing with possibilities. 

Taylor? No, you thought, he’s definitely dead. You saw his body in the morgue, in the open casket with his family. He was gone. 

Was there a chance that you had gotten a new one? You hadn’t seen anything about gaining a new soulmate after the death of another, but it also wasn’t common to find yours at such a young age, like you. 

You got knocked out of your thoughts--literally--when you felt a punch to your face. You dipped your head down, covering your left eye as you head starts to pound fiercely against your eye. Your vision started to blur with tears, a ringing in your ears. You clench your eyes shut, forcing yourself to take a breath and get to the counselor’s office before you started to investigate more. 

You asked the counselor about having a new soulmate when you met with her again, of course by writing it down. She pulled out a dirty notebook and flipped a couple pages before reaching her desired spot. 

She read to you that soulmates who lose their other half so suddenly and unexpectedly have a chance to gain a new one. It happens so rarely that there had been only two ever cases about it. The universe had a plan, they always planned ahead of time. The universe had a backup when they knew a soulmate was going to die unexpectedly. Meaning that in rare cases, people would be born without a soulmate until they were needed.  

When she asked about the sudden curiosity, the bell rang. You ran out of the office and into the crowded halls, to the cafeteria--which you commonly avoided. But, today, you wanted to see Bill. You could see how much mysteries sparked the kid’s interest and you needed help. 

You found him pretty easily, he was with his friends. You knew them from Bill pointing them out in the yearbook when he was showing you Henry Bowers. You barely knew their names but that was the least of your concerns. You scrambled in your backpack, finding a piece of paper and a pen. You scrawled the words “I need your help” on it before throwing the pen in your bag and striding up to Bill, confidently. 

Ignoring his friends that were silenced with confusion, you shoved the paper in Bill’s face. He grabbed it carefully, reading it slowly. 

“Damn Bill, since when did you know the hot new girl?” A kid with glasses exclaimed, smiling at your determined face. “Hi, hotstuff, I’m Richie Tozier, but you can call me your boyfriend!” Richie shoves his hand in your direction. You glance at his hand and then at his face, scrunching your brows together and tilting your head. 

“C-c’mon, (Y/N), we-we can go to th-the libr-library,” Bill says, cutting off your introduction to Richie. “I’ll see you-you guys af-after school!” He exclaims, grabbing your wrist and leading you away from his friends. 

“What the fuck?”

“Why can’t we go?”

“What just happened?”

Bill ignores the three and you two make it out of the loud cafeteria and through the halls until you both finally get to the small school library. 

“So, what di-did you need h-hel-help with?” Bill asks, sitting down on a chair. You sit next to him, opening your bag and scrambling for a random notebook. You find one and hurry, rushing out an explanation. When you finish, Bill slides towards him and scans it quickly, mouthing the words as he reads. He looks back to you once he finishes, he was shocked. 

He’s never heard of the whole gaining new soulmates thing and he didn’t know what to do. But he wanted to help his friend. “Wh-What do you wa-want me to do? How can I-how c-can I help?” You smile in relief, reaching over and hugging him tightly. 

Bill grins widely, hugging you back. It was only the start to a whole new adventure and he was excited to help you figure it out. 

You back up from him, blushing in embarrassment before turning back to your notebook and writing something more. 

‘Do you have any ideas? All I’ve got is asking around if there’s been a fight.’

Bill hums, racking his brain for ideas. Biting his lip, he looks over at you to see you tapping your pencil on the notebook. “M-Maybe we can my friends i-if they’ve heard of-of any fights re-recently? R-Richie surely knows, i-i-if not then we can ask the r-r-redhead, Beverly, from History c-class.” You nod, accepting the idea. 

“Okay, I-I have to go. I’ll meet-meet up with you by the b-bike rack and w-we-we can b-brainst-storm more on the w-way home. Y-You live near the sy-synag-synagogue, right?” After seeing you nod, he smiles. “O-Okay, I’ll w-wa-walk you home. R-R-Remember, by the b-bike rack!” Bill says, leaving you to think to yourself. 

I’m scared that if we don’t find my soulmate, I’ll lose them before I could get to know them. You thought to yourself, playing with your pencil. I don’t wanna know that they’re going through pain and I’m not doing anything to help. 

But, you didn’t know you were going to have to halt the investigation because less than a month later, Bill’s little brother ended up missing. 

You became close to Bill throughout his grieving. You related to him in a way. You both lost someone close to you, for you it might’ve been more painful in the sense of your soul ripping in two, but he lost his little brother. And he thought it was his own fault. 

Bill came to you to vent about Georgie. He went through all the stages of grief in front of you. And you were there to help him through it all. 

Being close to Bill also meant you became good friends with his. Stan Uris, Eddie Kaspbrak, and Richie Tozier became a constant in your routine. They didn’t pressure you to speak but they made light hearted jokes about it. You weren’t ever offended, you laughed with them. Richie made the most jokes though. He couldn’t go an hour without shooting a flirty comment at you with a wink. You found it adorably annoying.

Eddie and you became close too. After a freakout with Eddie not trusting any other boys with his extra inhaler, you stepped up and held it for him. You keep it in your bag at all times and when you didn't have your bag, you had it tucked in your pocket. He had a respect for you for putting up with Richie and not managing to smack him. You always shook your head and chuckled at his disbelief. 

Stan and you only became close after you found him crying with bruises up and down his arms. You helped him up and led him into your home, holding an ice pack to the worst of them all. Stan had been beaten by Henry Bowers and you caught him after he had ran far enough away to lose them. He gained the smallest crush on you after that, but you didn’t have know that. 

You didn’t ever bring up the possibility of having another soulmate to the boys. You didn’t want to stress Bill with his search for Georgie and you didn’t want the other three to ask questions about your first. Though, Richie loved to pester you. 

Richie loved to make jokes about being your soulmate, about how you never bring up soulmates because he was already in front of you. You always brushed it off and rolled your eyes at him. But, one day, the jokes seemed to be a reality. 

You were walking home from your therapist appointment when you felt something hit the back of your head. You reached up and rubbed at it, groaning about how your soulmate must be in wrestling club with how much fighting he did. As you came across Mr. Keene’s pharmacy to pick up your prescription, you glance down the alleyway. 

You almost didn’t catch it but you did a double take and saw Richie struggling against the brick wall as a platinum blonde boy holds him there. 

“Let go of me, bleach bottle! I got shit to do!” Richie exclaims, groaning as he tries to pull away from the kid holding him down. You step closer, hiding behind the wall as you watch. You knew you should help, but something was stopping you. 

“No, you don’t, trashmouth, not anymore.” You watch as a kid with a blonde mullet stalks towards Richie with something in his hand. “I’m gonna teach you to keep your mouth shut, faggot,” He snarls, clicking a button and showing off the glint of the knife. You gasp quietly, slipping away from the wall to try and stop him. You recognized the mullet from Bill pointing it out in the yearbook. Henry Bowers. 

Richie, for once, was shocked silent. His eyes watching as the knife practically glared at him. He swallows thickly as Henry brings the knife close to his face. “You better be happy to welcome a new stamp, Buck Teeth,” Henry mutters, poking the tip of the knife into Richie’s cheek and dragging it slowly across his skin. Richie’s eyes screw shut, gritting his teeth to stop himself from yelling. 

You gasp loudly, eyes widening as you spin to press your back to the brick wall. Your hand reaching to press against your cheek, feeling the knife dig into you but not showing any wound. Heat seemed to lick at your cheek, stinging and causing your eyes to water. Taking a couple deep breaths, you press a hand to your chest to calm your heart beat. 

“What the fuck was that?” Henry whispers to Victor who shrugs. “Well go fucking check, dipshit!” Victor jumps, letting go to Richie, who falls to the ground. He didn’t dare to get up, knowing that if he did Henry would just find a way to injure him more brutally. 

You tense, glancing around before rushing into the store you were hiding in front of. You watched at the bleach blonde looked everywhere before freezing and rushing back to the alleyway. You waited a couple seconds before leaving the store and glancing back where Richie was. 

Richie was pushing himself up, holding his cheek with a frown on his face. Henry and the other one, nowhere to be seen. You deem it safe enough to bolt into the alleyway and to Richie who looked up with fright in his eyes before relaxing at the sight of you. 

“Hey, dollface! What’s up?” He exclaims, smiling at you while still holding his cheek. He acted like nothing had happened. You stop in front of him and look at him incredulously. Blood was starting to drip from his fingers. “What? Oh, you mean this?” Richie asks, noting your shock. “It’s just a scratch, my dear, no need to worry!” You shake your head, grabbing Richie’s wrist and taking it from his face. 

He sucks in a breath, not liking how the cold air felt in his new wound. He didn’t notice how you winced as well. “Yea, okay. Might need a band aid, maybe? Say, where you headed?” Richie asks, suddenly losing interest in the still burning wound. You roll your eyes, pulling him along with you to Keene’s to pick up some supplies. 

“Do you think Mama (L/N) will freak about me bleeding out on your kitchen table?” You scoff at Richie’s words, dabbing a wet washcloth on his cheek to clean the blood from around the fresh band aid. “What? You don’t think so? You know your mom loves me, angel!” You freeze at the nickname. 

It was new—different from the other pet names he’s given you. You roll your eyes, brushing it off as him just finding a magazine that mentioned it. 

“You like that one? I made it up on my own!” Richie exclaims, smiling brightly at your reddening face. “Yea, cause you are like an angel. Maybe that’s why you don’t talk, cause if you do then none of us will be able to handle your beautiful voice and we’d all die because our heart burst from it!” Richie over exaggerates, springing up from the kitchen chair and laughing at your little jump. You chuckle a bit before turning around and cleaning up the mess you made. 

“Hey, (y/n)?” Richie asks, suddenly quiet and serious. You raise an eyebrow, turning on your heel and tilting your head at him in question. “Have you found your soulmate yet?” He mumbles, shocking you. 

You didn’t know if you should tell him. Yea, you were very happy you found your second soulmate but you didn’t know if you should tell him or let him figure it out himself. 

“You don’t have to answer, I was just wondering. Because, I’m scared I don’t have one,” Richie confesses. You sit down next to him, slowly, growing confused. “That or my soulmate is extremely careful because the last time I felt pain from them was…” Richie stops to think. “Have I ever felt pain from them before?” You sigh, looking down and grinding your teeth. 

You’ve been overly cautious about hurting yourself over things. You didn’t want to put your soulmate through something painful, it hurt you to see that you were the cause. But you needed to do something. You knew Richie was your soulmate, you just had to find the courage to show him. 

“It’s whatever. I can deal with not having one! It’s not like I need one or something!” Richie laughs, pushing away his true feelings. He stands up, rubbing his hands over pants before starting towards the door. You start to panic, not wanting him to leave on a sad note. You rack your brain, filing through the things you could do to make him stay. But there was really only one choice as there was nothing around you to help you.. “I should probably go, I was supposed to meet Eddie at the park—“

“W-Wait.” 

Richie freezes, a hand reaching towards the door. He spins on his heel slowly, his eyes wide and his jaw dropped. “Did you just—“ He cuts himself off as you start to walk closer to him. You nod. Your voice was hoarse, as it hadn't been used in more than a year. And you stuttered, you weren’t exactly used to talking anymore. 

“I—“

“Y-Your soulmate,” You confess, biting the inside of your cheek and watching him carefully. Richie’s face drops. He chuckles lowly, sounding betrayed. 

“Don’t try, angel. I don’t want you to fake being my soulmate just to make me happy,” You roll your eyes as Richie looks up at you with sad eyes. “You deserve to be with your actual soul—“ As Richie talks, you lift your arm and grab a lump of your skin in between two fingers, and squeeze. 

“Oh, fuc—“ Richie exclaims, jerking his arm to his chest quickly. He looks at you with confusion, his face screwed with disbelief. 

“You’re—“ He didn’t have to finish his words as you nod in confirmation. Richie laughs, relief seeping through. “Shit,” He breathes, bringing you in for a tight hug. “You’re actually my soulmate. Holy fuck!” Richie rambles, a grin gracing his features. 

You giggle, wrapping your arms around him and holding him close. You got a second chance, you didn’t wanna screw it up. You decided to put off telling him about Taylor. Richie’s smiling face was way too precious to be put down by your past. 

“Wait! I gotta tell Stan! He’s gonna shit himself!”

[cheaper-by-the-half-dozen]

on Im sitting here bored and waiting for time to pass.  I cant go to bed until like midnight because I forgot to take my morning pills and didnt take them until noon.  I have to take them 12 hours apart so it looks like a late night for me, at least I can sleep in tomorrow.  Because of my previous manic episode November/December they added Zyprexa.  I started seeing things...crumbs growing legs and walking across my table or moles on my body turning to bugs and burrowing into my skin.  Yikes that is fucking hard.  My doctor wants me to keep taking it, shes saying the reason I am seeing things is because I am extremely triggered from Delilahs death.  I mean shes not wrong.  Delilah my two month old niece died a month ago tomorrow. I miss her.  I miss my brother.  He is so broken.  I never got to hold Delilah I never got to meet her because of the pandemic.  Her death came 2 weeks after the death of my moms husband.  (Not my abuser).  My therapist thinks its normal that I am having such an intense reaction to all this.  I dont know yall, this sucks though. My legs are on fire.  I decided this year to use lent as my own little time to challenge the fuck outta myself.  So I am following the low carb/high fat plan on itrackbites and I am walking 5 miles every day during lent.  I am also completely off facebook for the next 40 days.  Theres other things like an unpacking challenge and declutter challenge.  I am on day 3 of 5 miles per day and my legs hurt so bad.  I know I should take a rest day but I told myself I would do it every day so I dont really wanna break it.  If my legs hurt too much tomorrow I will decide then.  Until that decision is made I am popping pain relievers (advil) and telling myself ‘no pain no gain’ or whatever that saying is.

Jeff and I started a new little date night thing.  Its more of a family night thing but its mostly just for him and I. We started the Marvel franchise in timeline order.  We have watched Captain America, Captain Marvel and today we watched Ironman.  Jeff has seen all of them, I havent.  Captain America and Captain Marvel were new.  I loved Captain Marvel.  I still think Captain America is overrated lol.  Idk why.

I downloaded the Peanut app and have met two friends!  One is an hour away and doesnt drive or anything so I am not really sure how much we will hang out.  The other one lives behinds the boys’ elementary school.  I am really excited to actually hang out and see if we click as well in real life as do in text.  She seems awesome.  I feel like once Covid is over we will know a couple people.  We will see. My sister and I made plans for our families to spend Easter together.  My niece (the one who was paralyzed in the accident) is at an incredibly high rate for death due to Covid due to her injuries.  Finn is high risk/immunocompromised.  We both spend all our time in social isolation (no one in or out, grocery deliveries)  We get together a couple times a year after we take covid tests.  We havent seen her since mid-january and I miss her and my nieces and nephews (and her husband) terribly.  So they are gonna come spend Easter weekend here and its Santanna’s birthday on Easter.  I am excited.  She has 5 living children and my 6, it turns out to be a fun time.  I will have a huge Easter Egg hunt and goodies bags for the kids to be given to them on Friday night.  So, I have that to look forward to.

My brother started dialysis last week.  My heart breaks for him.  He is in high spirits and my mom says hes really making progress as far as learning the machines.  I am so, so proud of her and the work she is doing for him.  She buried her husband and her granddaughter and was told her sons kidneys were in total failure and he needed dialysis in a fucking month dude.  She stands facing the storm unwavering.  My mom and I have our issues but I cannot help but look at her and think maybe, maybe I got my strength for her and the long line of Elliot women who came before her.

Not really sure what else to put here y’all.  I really would like to get back to using tumblr as a place to brain dump but its probably still really fucking toxic so.

[throwing-summers-at-the-walls]

Hello again ☺️Yes, that would have been really cool! I already read two of your recomnendations and i love them so thank you again for sharing! I can understand you being unsure of your writing but i bet there are people who will love it. Judging from how you answer your asks and how much you love John i have no doubt that i would love it. But if you dont wanna post it anywhere i would completely understand too. (1)

Im glad i came around to like Root cause otherwise it would have been hard to watch season 4 & 5 cause she appears a lot. I think part of it is cause i watched it witch my family and my dad loves her so i started to like her more too (you know who you love sth cause someone else loves it?) and then eventually i liked her to. Shaw i loved from day one and i loved her sibling energy with John. The John and Shaw dynamic was one of my favorites. I love their teasing and their chaotic energy (2)

As for Shoot i think its kinda cool that the writers just went with it cause of the chemistry and i like Shoot a lot. John and Harold would be amazing too (i mean whats better than one queer couple? Two queer couples!) And there are some parallels between the ships so there was room for both of them. Eventhough Harold and Grace is cute too. And i feel John has chemistry with almost everyone (not always romantic chemistry but also platonic chemistry if thats a Thing 😂) and (3)

in Addition to rinch i also really liked John with Zoe. The only one he had zero chemistry with was the theraphist imo. That ship was just weird. I wish they would have used that time for more Rinch scenes instead. -- yes someone who agrees about the happy end! I dont understand people who wish for a sad end. Like John is my fave character ever and i just want him to be happy with his newfound odd family and maybe someday adopt a cute baby with Harold or become an uncle or idk just be happy (4)

But in my Imagination he didnt die and someday he and Harold retired and started their quieter Happy life with Bear. --- yeah poi Reddit loves the later seasons and hates the first and i noticed they can get a bit mean with people who dont agree (thats why i only read and never write anything). Also said you could skip most of S1 which is just sad cause its a great season 😔 i will accept that i lost validity (is this even a Word?) for liking Root 😂 also yea 4x20 is the ep with the carter hallucinations so check it out. But a warning: Root appears :D sorry this ask got so long, but i just love talking to you and i always look forward to your replies :)

Hi !! Happy to see you're back :)

Glad you liked my recs ! I think there's quite an amount of fics with suicidal John out there actually. Not that surprising since it's canon.

I appreciate your support ! In the long run idk if it's healthy for me. Like a few months ago I fell back into ace attorney and I read a lot of fics about Miles being suicidal and it affected me negatively. Sometimes I purposefully seek out suicide fics. And it may not be the most healthy thing to do. So I'm not sure about that fic. Bc I do wanna write it, but idk if it'd be healthy, as catharsis, or unhealthy, as rumination. I mean I've been writing that body horror fic with some projection of my body issues and it's fine. But yeah I'm pretty sure that if I ever finish it I think I'll post it – after all I posted a fic in which John jumped off a bridge a long while ago before I got suicidal (foreshadowing my own life here lmao). I also wanna try to work on my other wips

Yeah I see, that's understandable. Ngl Root makes me not motivated to get to these seasons during my rewatch (which technically wouldn't be a rewatch). It's wild how I feel nothing for Shaw (she do be kinda hot tho,,,, muscles,,,,,) but I think it's mostly bc I wasn't that interested in her back then and it's been so long since I watched the show I don't remember shit about her. She'd be able to grow on me I think. Yeah I've seen a lot of posts about that "mayhem twins" dynamic around here it does sound cool. Also it's refreshing to have a male/female relationship that isn't turned into a forced romance. But I'll always have a soft spot for S1 and its four core characters.

It's nice if they have chemistry, I didn't feel like they did. Yeah I'm still disappointed that they didn't go for Rinch too. I mean come on their chemistry is so painfully obvious ! I dislike the word queer but mood pls just give me canon Rinch I'm fucking begging hhhhhhh. I'm quite sure the notion of chemistry works with non romantic relationships as well. John is definitely good with people. He looks scary and brooding but he's just a good man who wants to help people ! I love him so much and same he's my fav character of all time !! Also I love seeing him interact with kids he's so good with them. But I also love when he's being an absolute badass. Damn I always forget about Grace gkjdfkjfd I don't have anything against her though, Harold and her are cute together. (Not much into the grace/harold/john OT3 tho, I've seen it around after return 0 but :/ not my thing. But hey good for people who like it.)

I liked John and Zoe too. Even if he had chemistry with Iris it's so cringe, didn't think poi would fall as low as portraying such a relationship between a therapist and a patient. Guess that shows the decrease in quality in the later seasons. Sad they did that shit when as you said they could have showed more Rinch. Like come ooon Rinch is just. Right fucking here. Just make it canon you cowards.

Yeah fuck sad endings (John didn't die obviously) I want my men to be happy and in love and live a good life together with their dog is that too much to ask. Like sometimes I read fics with MCD bc why not but most of the time I just want happiness. Fluffy domestic Rinch is so good ! Gives me so much life. I have a soft spot for married Rinch as well. Also while we're at it let me rec this domestic fluff fic:

Yeah not surprised. And you're right don't waste your time arguing on reddit lol it's not worth it. It baffles me when people say S1 is boring like ??? Where ?? There's literally soooo many eps I love in this season !! 📣📣📣number crunch is the best ep📣📣📣 Glad they stay over on reddit with their last seasons and their shit opinions about S1 smh. Like imagine being a fan of a show and disregarding the season that created the basis of the show and developed characters and relationships. Big brain time uh

I'm quite sure validity is an actual word, and that's how it be if you like root :/ I don't make the rules :/ you're the half valid anon now 😂

Oh well I shall endure root if it's a good ep ^^

It's cool !! I love your long asks !! I hope I didn't get lost in my own reply lmao

[winnies-headcannons]

I wanna tell you guys about my life because it's been bothering me recently.

Tw: suicide, mental hospitals, self harming, running away, stupid teenage love.

So back in middle school I was highly suicidal. I had just broken up with a guy who treated me like trash but I still loved him, everyday I would cry even at school. It got so bad to the point where I stopped going to school. I couldn't be their with him anymore, not while he was in the same building.

So I started self harming, all down my right wrist and thighs. I could barely walk. It wasn't so bad where i had to get it stitched but it was bad. My mom had seen the cuts on my arm and forced me to show here where all i cut. She took me to my therapist/psychiatrist thingy and I agreed to go to the mental hospital because I knew I needed help. Well I faked being okay in the hospital to get out, and it worked.

As soon as I got home I started cutting and distancing myself again I even almost lost privilege to my door but I didnt. I started punching my wall, cutting. Then I ran away from my moms house because she threatened me with another mental hospital. I ran to my aunt's house because she didnt judge me, she actually tried to help me so I got to stay with my grandma because my aunt didn't have room for me.

December 28th around 1 to 2 am in the morning I overdosed on my medication. I was forced to tell me grandma because I kept throwing up, and when I told them all hell broke lose. My cousin even tried to hurt me because I was 'stupid' and 'only thinking about myself' it didnt help that it was my grandpa's birthday.

Well they took me to the regular hospital and had me checked out, well I had to stay over night and they transferred me to another mental hospital. I didnt fake this time though I wanted to get better. I hated feeling this way, my family said it was my fault for being depressed and that i makw myself feel depressed but i didnt. I wanted to be happy.

When I got out the hospital I just went back to cutting and everything. It didnt help, so i decided to change, I changed the way I looked and the way I proceeded things. Yes it helped but what really helped is my online friends, they were their when no ne else was besides a few irl friends. I actually got better

And today I still struggle with depression but I am 8 months clean of self harm and I refuse to let anyone take that away from me.

Just thing all of that because of some stupid boy I met in middle school. Wasn't even a real relationship, but I was with him for 8 months before i decided enough.

Moral of the story, dont let a guy/girl bring you down like that. It's hard to let go but in the end you will look back and think "wow I got through it" seek help, professional help a long with friendly help. Also dont be afraid to dm me because I do know how it feels.

[fujiwaratofushop-archive-blog]

not to be dramatic or anything but jjba, my partner, and my two best friends are the only thing keeping me glued together

and like to continue on i just feel like no matter what i do nothing is correct and everyone hates me/is out to ruin my life and i can only ask those three for assurance so many times

i walk into work and i fear its gonna get out that i work there and was my old self every time someone from school comes in and immediately catastrophize and dissociate to make it through my shift and i fear him coming back in and seeing me and finding a way to harm me again

i hate the fact im going to have to hide who i am yet again but also that even online i dont have any spaces to call my own except my friend server and i always feel im stepping on others toes and that im faking everything i am

its to the point where kin bullshit is the only consistent coping method i have on hand as everything else has been exhausted over years and years

i cant see a psych as none are available for the next 6 months in my town even not under my insurance and no therapists can be seen for 2 so im kinda dying scoob but ill claw my way out i guess

the murmuring is getting slooowly worse and more annoying and i dont wanna break again

[mjalti]

hi ana, two of my closest friends had an argument a few months ago and it resulted into them ending their friendship. i wasn't at all involved in the argument but it happened in our group chat. one of them blamed me for not sticking up for anyone in the argument but i didn't want to interfere bc i felt like it wasn't my place to pick sides. she resented me for it and i stopped talking to her for a few days. when we started talking again, she seemed very distant to me and ...

… she subtly made it clear to me that she didn’t want to see me. i wanted to see her bc i wanted to talk to her about the argument irl bc i personally believe that nothing good comes out of arguing over text. her resentment grew overtime when she found out that i was on good terms with our other friend. to her i was picking sides bc i was still talking to my other friend. my friend was mad at me because i didn’t try harder to make amends with her. she was going through something horrible …… horrible at the time. she had lost her dad a few months prior to the argument. i wanted to be there for her but how can you be there for someone who doesn’t want you to be there? i guess i should’ve tried harder and i do blame myself for that and i feel like an asshole for making these assumptions based on the texts i got from her. i guess what i wanted to ask to you was how do i cope with this guilt that i’m feeling? i let her down when she needed me the most and there’s nothing i can do …. to reverse the damage. i’m really sorry for bothering you with this. i’m dumping all of this on you i know this is too much but i have no one else i can talk to about this.

hey honey. whoooo.a lot to unpack here. first you are absolutely correct that it is better to have a flowing real life conversation than one via text. i dont know you or your friends or anything but it is not out of the question that Dead Father friend feels really unheard and doesnt feel like her grief is SEEN by others, understood by herself, or she is immature & being dealt these situations on top of that. i dont know that she doesnt WANT you there, i just think she might want a different level of intensity to the friendship that she doesnt feel like her friends are providing. now, in terms of your guilt…i think you were right to stay out of it via text. Nothing can be really understood in a text-based argument, but lots can be misinterpreted. i think if you wanted to, you should get together with ur Other friend & ask her about how she feels regarding Dead Father friend & if Dead Father friend’s reaction could just be from grief/etc. if you both want to, then contact the Dead Father friend and you can be like “we know that this has been a really surreal time for you and we just want you to know that we love you even through the arguments & stuff and we wanna support you.” and show up at her place with a care package that has like movies she likes & just watch them together. allow her to set the pace about where she wants to go too.also encourage her to see a therapist during this time bc it is very intense to lose a parent esp if ur close to them. your goal shouldnt be to “erase the damage”, think of relationships to people as more elastic. sometimes we get farther (stretched more) and other times we are very close (relaxed). no matter how far you stretch, you can always make it back to where you were with work. how you work thru the miscommunication is what shows that you value someone in ur life, not that there are NO miscommunications bc arguments are a part of life. at the end of the day… it is not your responsibility to save Dead Father friend from herself. you do have an obligation as a friend to try, to reach out, to love her, but you cannot carry any guilt with you. I wish you all the best 💕