#i havent been that satisfied on food for like

[nikosasaki]

desperately looking for a good tweet/twitter thread template who can help a friend out

[lettuce-seize-the-day]

feeling really weirdly homesick rn

[athanasius-symposium-of-writings]

Heartbeat

This header is from this post i havent stopped staring at by @/askmatthias (pls check him out omg omg omg it so good pls you gotta look at it gives me life actively)

In honor of Matthias coming home (in five days) and me begging for his s tier skin -hands you a fic- bby pls come home i need you in need you

Rated Explicit | Warning: vampirism

The clashing of swords drew his attention innocently, when it was quiet he did not know the scene would change to see you putting back on your shirt and the Lord of the Desaulnier manor fixing his hair.

“Your lamb is here.” The man is shirtless and holding a foil-fencing sword in each hand. Matthias never directly interacted with the mysterious noble but almost everyone says he is a cold standoff individual, Aesop though never spoke ill of him.

“At least pretend to be a gracious host, Joseph!” Snapping at him while he puts the foil-fencing swords back on the sword racks. The click of the vampire lord's tongue is loud. He is intimidating, beautiful as a woman but graceful as a man, Matthias stares then stops the second the other notices.

“Be sure to do what we talked about, (Name).” His hand is on your lower back and his lips are on your shoulder as he pulls back your shirt. It is personal, and though you are intimate with most of those who live in this manor, what he sees is some more to it.

From what you told him about vampires by nature are creatures who bend to the whims of desire, a beast that hungers endlessly. Some can control it while others become enslaved by it.

“Yes, monsieur.” You turn your head as he places two more kisses before slipping away. “Good night.” It is strange hearing you speak with a much more gentle tone. You are gentle, especially with Emil, Andrew, and Aesop. You can be kind, you can be firm, and you adjust to the needs of the individual.

“Evening.” Lord Desaulnier says before turning around and heading towards the door the puppeteer stands in front of.

Matthias moves aside not wishing to touch him unintentionally, his eye glancing and catching the cold glance of piercing red eyes. That made the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

The door is closed behind him and now you are alone with the vampire fledgling.

“Don't mind him,” Speaking up when alone with the new arrival, “He is the same way with Emil too.” Emil is the man who is always lingering in your shadow. One might say shy but Matthias believes he is cautious. The only man to sleep in your room, and honestly sleep there.

“I see.” His gaze is elsewhere as you finish dressing, “Training this late?”

“Joseph needed to clear his mind for a bit,” You turn around now once more wearing your shirt, “You're up late. Can't sleep?”

Matthias shakes his head, “... I got hungry.” Though he ate a few hours ago, his gut still ached for more.

“Alright,” Taking his hand, “Let's go to your room.”

“Wait, why my room?” He was going to head to the kitchen.

“To feed, unless you want to bite me here?” Titling your head to the side slightly curiously.

“No,” Clearing his throat, “No, I mean… Are you sure?” It has been some time since he fed on you, he still fears he may hurt you.

“Of course. You need a direct source before you can solely use the blood vials and blood wine.”

You learned during your time with Joseph that there are ways to satisfy the beast of hunger. Solid foods like red meats from animals help maintain and hold weight. Bloodwine to calm the body. Blood vials to store and immediately drink if one is not feeding on enough blood— However, blood in storage can clot over time.

Direct blood drinking though has its uses but rarely is anyone willing like you, and rarely do most vampires know how to drink enough without killing anyone.

"Come on, the sooner you feed the less likely you will hurt me.”

The puppet named Louis is in another room locked in a case. This is done by Matthias Czernin's specifications, yet, he still checks the locks on the door. The door is across from his room and sandwiched between Edgar's room and Frederick's room. Both are pure-blood vampires who were given invitations by Joseph.

Matthias rarely sees his neighbors, thankfully. You did that purposely so he does not feel like he must interact with everyone immediately.

You wish he would personalize his room… A bed, a workbench for his puppeteering equipment, and a wardrobe. Nothing more.

“(Name).” Having you sit on the bed with your back to him, “Can you… May you lower your shirt?”

You lower it until it rests on your forearms, and you lean your head to the side exposing your neck. His hands are restless, unsure of what to do. “Hold my shoulders to keep me steady.” He holds you, gentle at first but he grips harder when his fangs latch onto your neck.

The sting from fangs piercing skin is not something you can grow used to, it hurts a tad less but the pain is still there. But the pain never lingers as pain turns to pleasure, your body swaying as he drinks from you. You know your limits and the more he feeds the closer you are to reaching it.

“Matthias,” A groan from him as his arms wrapped around you keeping you in place, “Matthias, enough.” You might have to stop him and your hand reaches behind you to touch his face.

This makes him stop feeding, his mouth off your skin, tongue licking the residue of blood seeping out of the bitemark.

“You did good.” Praising him as you turn around when his arms let go of you, “Feeling better?”

A nod, he looks away, “You should put your shirt back on.” If he can blush then he has enough blood in his system.

“It's just my chest.” Teasing him, “You have seen me naked before.”

Once! By mistake because Naib Subedar and Norton are too daring for their own good!

“Do you not want to look at me?”

“I do.” A desperate tone, “But…”

“But?”

“More.” He tries to find the words, “I would want more.” His hands on his lap gripping the fabric of his pants.

You fully turn and take his hand placing it on your chest, the center where he can feel your steady heartbeat. You push forward against it until you are close enough to smell your blood on his lips.

“(Name).” Do not tease him, please do not be cruel.

“Matthias.”

The bed creaks with movement, the shared uneven breathing, the moans and groans of pleasure. The room for the first time seems more lively than it has in months.

You move your hips, rocking them forward and back, grinding slowly on his lap. There is no rush, you want him to experience this slow and steady for right now. You hold onto his back, his hands holding your thighs from underneath. His mouth meshed with yours, the puppeteer cannot get enough of kissing you.

He is not the best kisser as he has no experience in this but he learns along the way by copying your movements. Everywhere you touch it is like his body cannot help yearning for more, the voices for once are silent, and gazing up at you is like looking upon a god.

You would never take such a compliment, you never believe yourself above others whether physically or mentally. Everyone is an equal and you give only what others give you.

He wishes you would not. Wish you had met him first… Saved him. Though he knows it took a lot to get you to this current gentle state. The violence he heard Aesop was the first, he spoke only once about the large photograph of you in one of the rooms in the manor. The you who knew only blood and steel, a far cry to the person he has in bed with him.

When you both are exhausted, laying on the bed covered in the thin coat of sweat with his cum inside of you and you cum on his all over his now cock. His hand is on his chest, there is no heartbeat but he swears he can feel it racing. His eyes close as you pet his messy hair, his head on your chest with his ear above your racing heart.

You speak to him, asking him if he is okay or if he needs anything.

“You,” Clinging to you, “Can you stay?” Emil is probably going to be in a bad mood tomorrow when he wakes up to you not beside him. For some reason that makes Matthias happy.

“Yes, I can.” Smiling sheepishly, “As long as you want.”

[bkglovergirl]

hi! could i request a hawks x male/depressed reader? reader struggles to eat/get out of bed, mostly non verbal + struggles with executive dysfunction:) been having a rough time lately being stuck in a depressive episode and keigo really keeps me going LMAO

pls don’t feel pressured to write this if you don’t feel comfortable/able! <3

I hope you feel better! And of course, I’ll do it! I get it completely lol

╭₊˚๑Keigo Takami(Hawks) X Depressive reader﹕☁️₊˚

TW: eating struggles, Depressive habits 

Anyone feeling like this just know it gets better and I hope this helps!

Word Count; 1.1k words

 ִֶָ 𓂃⊹

For the past two weeks, maybe more—honestly, who is counting—you have been lying in bed. You've barely gotten up to go to the bathroom and eat. It’s not like you are sleeping. No, you are quite literally just lying in bed doing nothing. The energy it takes to grab your phone or even charge it is a lot, and the last time you checked, it was five percent. You know what caused this yet being in bed is causing more stress but you just can’t get up. Work, training, and studying. You are so behind on both yet you refuse to sit up and at least open a book. 

“Baby?” You don’t know when this man went here, but he’s kneeling down in front of you. You glance at him, and he looks worried. God, you hate when he’s worried, especially when it involves you. “It’s been four weeks, You gotta get up.” So he’s keeping count, great. You use the energy you have to turn and face away from him but he quickly stops you. “Come on, talk to me at least what’s going on?” You just stare at him. He sighs and walks out of the bedroom. You bring the blankets over your head and let out a little sigh. He just walked out, he’s so over this and over you, you think. You don’t know how long you were under the blanket for overthinking but the heat is getting to much so you kick the blanket off you and you smell… food? It smells good but also nauseating, Your stomach growls and you realize you havent ate in a while. Keigo waddles back into the room, holding a try with pasta and water, he walks to the side of the bed you arent rotting on and slowly places the try on his lap. “Come on baby, sit up and eat.” You slowly sit up and rest your back on the headboard. He grabs the bowel and hands it to you, You take it and stare at it. “What’s wrong? Isnt this your comfort food?” You nod but still just stare at it. “You gotta speak to me baby, I can only know so much… are you nauseous?” You nod. “It’s because you havent ate, take a bite a promise youll feel better.” Keigo debates in his head a bit before grabbing the fork and bringing it up to your mouth. You take a bite and slowly chew, you let out a satisfied sigh and grab the fork from him and start eating. “Slow down!” he laughs.

 𓂃⊹

After you ate Keigo had walked out to go clean up and wash the dishes, he had left the cup of water you without knowing avoided. You were just staring at it. Slowly but surly you grab it and start drinking it, the coldness felt nice and you ended up chugging it until there was only ice left. Keigo walked back in and quickly noticed the glass empty, he smiled looking at you and you smile back. He goes to the side of the bed you are on and picks you up, surprised you gasp and wrap your arms around his neck. “It’s alright baby.” 

He brings you into the bathroom and the smell of the room hits you admittedly. Keigo had lit a Vanillia candle and it rest right near the sink. Next you notice the bath he set up, filled with bubbles and your hair products, face products and soup all set up. Keigo sets you down slowly and you look at him, “Hands up.” you listen and he takes off your shirt. You blush and cover yourself quickly. “It’s okay baby, youre beautiful.” slowly you put your arms down. “Do you want help with your shorts?” You shake your head ‘no’ and take them off yourself. “Alright baby hop in.” He takes off his shirt and you get into the tub, sitting down. Keigo runs out of the bathroom quickly and runs back in holding a cup? “Almost forgot!” You smile.

Keigo kneels down besides the tub and fills the cup full of water, “alright tilt your head back and close your eyes.” You listen and he wets your hair. When he thinks he got it wet enough, he grabs your shampoo and massages it into your hair. “Don’t fall asleep on me.” You giggle as he washes the shampoo out of your hair. He repeates and does the same thing with the conditioner, you fight back the sleep. “All done, now turns and face me.” you listen and he grabs your face cleanser, you watch as he puts some in his hands and rubs it on our face slowly, “what is I give you a soap mustache?” You shake your head no and he laughs, he wets a face cloth and gets all the soap off your face. With the same facecloth he rinceses it and puts your body soup on it, he slowly washes your body and you can’t help but avoid looking at him. “Oh don’t do that.” he whines and you look at him. Smiling he gives you a quick kiss.

 𓂃⊹

You stand there shivering in a towel as Keigo runs back into the bathroom with a fresh new pair of clothes for you. “Do you want me to do it?” You shake your head ‘no’ and get yourself dressed, Keigo takes this as a win. He knows you have the energy and strength to walk back into the bed but he picks you up and beings you into the bedroom and softly puts you on the bed. He goes and grabs your brush and sits behind you, he carefully brushes your hair making sure not to hurt you. 

“M’sorry…”

“Shh don’t apologize baby.” he kisses the top of your head. “I know everything is a lot right now, and I should have stepped away from work sooner and helped you.”

“It’s okay.”

“It’s not, I thought you just needed time but I ignored you for to long. Just know i’m here baby and I’ll aways be here.” He puts down your hair brush and pulls you onto him, he combs his fingers through your hair. 

“You don’t hate me right..?”

“Of course not baby! Don’t make me laugh! Stuff get’s stressful I understand. I Love you and this won’t change that.”

“I love you so much.” You turn and hug him tightly.

[puppyeared]

i think the reason why im so drawn to spirit tracks and pkmn scarvi is that having the legendary/princess as a companion rather than a goal that marks the games completion makes me feel satisfied the way i would after helping a friend

my brother always teases me about how I still havent finished botw after almost 7 years bc "id rather be out picking flowers" which i wont say is untrue. and yes i know Zeldas been holding off ganon for 100 years, yes i can get some sort of idea what her relationship with link was like by recalling memories and going through her diary. ive always loved botw for its unique storytelling and setting which makes it stand out, because it lets you get to know who you're saving.

but because theyre memories, it only works if theres something for the player to investigate that already happened. its retroactive (but effective nonetheless)

on the other hand, spirit tracks does something similar but instead of having the player try to piece together memories and interpret them as a spectator, you actually have an opportunity to get to know zelda yourself by talking to her and working together. besides making it a gameplay mechanic, giving the player control over how they interact with zelda makes it so much more personable.

and I find that making the goal feel personal instead of an obligation gives me more of a reason to work towards it. I know what kind of person botw zelda was but as the player, shes still very much a stranger to me. but spirit tracks zelda? thats my friend!!!! she invited me to go to the beach after we get her body back!!! i dont want to whip her to make her move faster thats mean :(

you know how hostage negotiators are trained to introduce themselves and get to know the person theyre negotiating with because its harder to hurt someone when you know what their favorite food is? its kinda like that, because it feels like im helping a friend than being told or led to do smth

and although i havent played scarvi myself, i feel an attachment to koraidon and miraidon even just watching playthrough clips because its like!! thats my weird scaly dog!! it loves sandwiches and we're friends!!! you know!!!!!!

[the-s1lly-corner]

I’m baaaaack!!

Oh I’ve missed your writing, I just got dragged off due to some stuff irl and having a mini hyper fixation on Eddie Munson-

How are you dear? 🥺 everything okay? Drinking water and eating food? I hope you are!

Would love to see if you could possibly do hcs of all the different ways LJ would comfort you and show you how much he loves you as well as how he’d react to his s/o having gift giving and physical touch be her main love languages!

- 🩶 Anon

Laughing Jack comforting a reader who has gift giving/touch as a love language!

i have one other request in the inbox asides this one but i think imma save it for later since im!! tired.. im doing okay-ish? ups and downs, i will admit the past few weeks i havent been feeling right/like myself but im sure its just a funk or something.. gotta drink more water, though </3 hope you enjoy this anon!

jack is very very clingy himself, like in an emotional sense but also a physical sense... if it were efficient he would wrap himself around you and not let go but unfortunately a lot of things in life would get inconvenienced

a majority of that clinginess comes from his abandonment issues, with only a portion just being a part of his personality

very verbal in wanting to keep you around, and while he may not out right say or ask it, i think sometimes he needs some reassurance from you that youre not going to be going anywhere

will take any chance he can to sling his arm around you, usually just draping it over your shoulders lazily while you guys hang around one another

i dont think hes opposed to hand holding, either.. he has very large hands and theyre warm... sharp claws, though

if anything you might have to ask him to give you space because he wants to spent a lot of his free time with you (and hes got a lot of free time if youre the one in possession of that little box of his); i think sometimes he can get a little overwhelming/overstimulating... i love him but personally i think he could be a little much every now and then

loves leaving you notes, usually leaves some candy with them. typically leaves them in places where he knows you'll find them, like by your keys or at the front door... likes leaving them when he knows youre about to leave for work or any other outing... will still leave them if hes the one leaving for something, although its rare that he needs to head out for something and admittedly i cant think of anything he would need to do/get done that would require him to leave briefly

looooooooooves showering you in affection, especially if you guys are in a romantic relationship; peppers you in kisses and snuggles into your cheek.. hugs, lots of hugs. will take any chance he can get to snake his arms around you. please cuddle him

so i think its safe to say that the physical touch bit is more than satisfied, on both ends

as for gift giving, i gotta say my brain is a little melted so i can tell whos giving and whos receiving, so lets do both!

if youre the one giving gifts to jack hes going to be totally over the moon...! a present? for HIM? is it christmas? is it his birthday? ...i dont.. think he has a birthday, actually... but that aside i think he would adore nearly anything you give him since hes totally obsessed with you. likely keeps it within close reach, be it in his own space, his box, or even in his hair since that functions as a means of storage in my silly hc!!

if hes the one giving gifts i think he would try to slink around to figure out what you like.. if its something more than candy then maybe... this would be one of those rare chances where he leaves the house for something, making sure not to be seen of course. which is easy when he can turn into a puff of smoke at will. honestly knowing him hes probably not going to be able to hold himself back from the gifts, so prepare to wake up to a whole pile of them in the morning... might try his hand at wrapping them but due to his claws theres some holes and slashes... but its the thought that counts..!

though if he needs to hide anything for occasions like birthdays hes not going to be able to keep it a secret... if he doesnt blurt it out hes going to be really antsy and keep checking where ever hes hiding the gifts to see if theyve been found or tampered yet

adding this in because i forgot comforting the reader!! right before i was about to hit post!!

if youre feeling anxious about him leaving or being upset with you i think he would reassure you to the best of his ability

tries to keep the mood light, likely cracks jokes while hes holding your hands... might be slightly rocking your hands back and forth or side to side

looks like the type to kiss tears away... though hes gonna have the be careful about it given that cone nose of his... though him attempting to be gentle while keeping his determination to pepper your face with pecks might be enough to crack a smile from you

literally will not leave you alone until youre smiling

[michu-writes]

🐉 K, so...... I never played Omori, but I wanna give you something to write, so how about just general dating headcanons with Hero and Kel? You can do them separately or as a poly ship, either way, is fine. Hope that satisfies you and you'll have fun writing this. Love you! <3

A/N: I KNOW YOU HAVENT PLAYED OMORI AND HAVE LITTLE TO NO KNOWLEDGE ABT IT BUT THIS MADE ME CACKLE

Kel and Hero are brothers so- no poly headcanons ofc BUT SEPERATELY I WILL DO!!! Thank you for requesting dear anon <3

Hero

Malewife? Manwhore? You're lucky to have him as a boyfriend. He's one of the (only) most respectful cis men out there, no joke /j.

He'll shower you with kisses and bring food to your bed !!!!! Hero loves cuddling with you too after a long day of studying just to clear his mind. You both would also cook or bake something together!!! Doesn't matter if you're good or bad at it, because you'll always succeed as long as Herj is with you el oh el.

You guys met in Faraway town a few weeks before he was gonna leave for college at the park. You noticed he looked lonely and uneasy in a way, so you decided to talk to him. He stated he just needed some fresh air and so did you!! You guys eventually became friends and found out you were both gonna attend in the same college, so that is great!

Unfortunately, you guys didn't end up in the same dorm but you both still visited each other at anytime you could!! You still saw each other all around the campus but still yeyeyeye. Anyways he had a little hard time opening up to you,,, but he did tell you about Mari eventually. You felt really bad and awful for him, that must be a really really hard thing to go through at such a young age. You told him everything was gonna be fine and she's in a much better place now. After that you both pretty much got closer and the story goes on!!!

After like a year or two of being buds to good buds to best buds, you finally confessed and he surprisingly felt the same way!! Kel and his dad pretty much knew the whole time, but his mom kept denying it and saying "they're just best friends……."

But when you and Hero came back home from college, he asked if you wanted to meet his family face to face (because you have only been able to video chat with them whenever you were hanging out with Hero in your dorms) and you gladly said yeah. Everyone welcomed you as family and was happy for both of you. Kel May or may not have been like "Ew romance" but that's just how he is. His mom though was like "Oh!" and just needed a moment to process because she never thought Hero would get a s/o anytime soon. But she greeted you and was very nice so no worries!!!

One time you were visiting Hero and you both had to babysit Sally because everyone else was away. He was just done making lunch and was about to tell you until he saw you on the couch. He couldn't help but shed a tear of how cute and gentle you were with Sally, he instantly knew you'd be an awesome parent if you wanted to!!!

You were a bit worried about why he was crying but he quickly said you were just adorable when you were all cuddled up with his little sister. Sally was all fast asleep beside you while you snuggled her up close to your chest as you were watching TV with a blanket.

10/10 boyfriend, would recommend.

Kel

This kinda depends of how much energy you got because if you're like leaning more into the calm and relaxed type, you'll just watch him being a complete idiot in awe. He likes it because he knows your don't mind his chaotic nature (most of the time). But if you match his energy, oh god. Everything will go down hill. You'll both at least commit 5 crimes in a day. It might be really fun, but you both need someone to stop you. Like Hero perhaps.

You have known each other for a long time ever since the whole gang even formed. You both were best friends and was the only people who didn't close off which you both can agree were greatful for. You would invite him to do something to keep his mind off of things for a bit after Mari's death, and all the stress and worries about Hero. It helped and he just couldn't stop thanking you. His parents adores you for trying your best. Kel also helps you too in many different ways, you guys have each other.

When Sunny finally left his house to hangout with Kel before he moved away, they both invited you to tag along, in which you gladly agreed on. Sunny noticed the tension between you two and pointed it out. Let's just say you were both a red burning mess after that.

Sunny was kinda the one who egged Kel on to confess to confess to you because of the obvious crush, so thanks to him.

Kel usually asks Hero for relationship advices. He would also ask his dad, but they're always so long and dumb in his opinion.

He !!! Loves !!!!! Going out !!!!!! On dates !!!!!! You guys can also stay inside. His favorite dates are maybe going on a stroll at night or a movie night. During the strolls, you guys just just look at the night sky and admire the stars and moon while holding hands and rant about your favorite things ! During the movie nights, you just lay on the sofa with snacks in the table, a blanket covering the two who was all cuddled up, probably watching some horror or action movie.

Kel loves to creep up on you and scare you when you're not looking, he finds your reaction hilarious.

Will always hold your hand or have his arm around your shoulders. He'll also give you random hugs and kisses anywhere at all (unless you don't like pda which is totally fine). He's so sweet and goofy.

[thespacesandsilences]

i gained 5lbs these last two days from an indulgence that snow balled into an aggressive binge

i havent binged like this before which was scary lol. two days ago i hosted a lunch with friends were i made alfredo and after everyone left and my gf was asleep i immediately felt the urge to try this vegan mexican cheese i got. while i was making a grilled cheese i decided since i had already eaten more than i wanted today “why not” just binge on the rest of bread i have so theres no more bread to worry about🙃 so i binged on like 5 slices of bread, then added pepperoni onto my grilled cheese (still excusing it as wanting to get rid of food in my fridge by eating it instead of it going bad) THEN even though i felt how full i was i ate a packet of instant ramen to also “get rid of” all the while i was drinking multiple glasses of alcohol since i already said fuck it to my calories🥲

the next day i told myself i would fast to cancel it out, but i decided breakfast (at noon) couldnt hurt. i ate one black bean burger (160) and one bun (160) with red cabbage (10) and i felt satisfied. after a few hours i felt myself get hungry so i decided id make some miso soup to get rid of my week old tofu and i thought itd be an okay idea to just add half a ramen packet (again, like an idiot, to get rid of the immense food i have since i HATE WASTE). all was well after that until i experienced the worst case of binge urges ive ever had. it genuinely felt like i was high or drunk ive never felt disassociation so strongly. i got up multiple times to eat out of my fridge and each time i made something, sat down, ate it, and as i was chewing the last bite i was already up and looking through my food for something else to gorge on. i could feel just how full i was but it’s like nothing mattered in that moment except for shoveling down anything i could in those 24 hours.

later i needed something from target and i couldnt help but get a pack of two-bite sweets. my stomach was in pain at this point yet i wolfed down 5 in the car alone. then i went to fucking cane’s and thought, just a sandwich that’s all (like i hadnt been eating all day like a pig anyways). the sandwich was GIGANTIC like i dont know why i was surprised in the slightest. and STILL i demolished all of it, in my car of course because of the shame and i knew i had to throw out the trash as soon as possible. that wasnt enough.

i went home and ate another third of the two-bites and genuinely felt sick and uncomfortable for hours.

so yeah, it’s no surprise i gained 5 lbs since i definitely ate well over 8,000 calories those two days alone, so im flipping the switch as best as i can.

[wolfstrong]

ive been so delusional lately i havent beel like in monthhhsss but i actually love being delusional like who cares whats going on I'm just in my mind palace. if i get super delusional i can just picture food i don't have access to and i imagine myself eating it and i swear its almost as satisfying as the real thing. i do this for fun

[oak23]

Since I usually use my dolls to fill up my time, having them packed away has sort of started my poor eating habits again and it's stressing me out cuz it's just so easy to eat as a way to relax and fill up my time. It's only been a day or two but I'm just putting this out there to keep myself accountable.

Idek I havent eaten this poorly since a year or two ago but it's surprising how little fast food actually fills me up or leaves me satisfied and I tend to eat significantly more to feel full again, considering most of my usual meals nowadays are a lot simpler but are smaller portions and leaves me feeling full and has stuff like protein and vitamins lol.

I'm gonna start eating better again but this small dip into stress eating has reminded me why it's practically impossible to lose weight while only eating fast food because I need to eat significantly more of it to feel full, but also the fact the food is significantly higher in calories but is nutritionally void so I'm just setting myself up for a bad time.

[kimsaiakarii]

Deatbeat! Draken x chubby reader

This is a preview of my story feel free to check out on my Watppad @Kazuichis_Simp <3 love you hope you guys enjoy it

'I really wonder how my life went so wrong. I really thought we could live a nice life all three of us'.  I thought to myself looking out the window in the backseat of a taxi. "Miss we are at your destination." the driver said smiling at you. "Thank you, sir.' was all you said as you stepped out the car and into the building.

 "AHEM, are you forgetting something?" the driver says holding his hand out. "Oh yeahhhh" 'Dammit, I forgot my money' "Actually sir I forgot to bring money" I say sheepishly shrugging my shoulders. " The driver just spat at my shoes and driving off saying some inaudible something like "You stupid fat bitch". 

I couldn't care less I'm just here to pick up my daughter from my best friend's house. Pressing the buzzer to let her know I'm here I see a familiar guy with black hair and blue eyes but quickly transition my focus on the door as it unlocks itself.

 I go down the hallway just to see that the elevator is out of service. 'Fucking great.' I sigh to myself looking up at the stairs. 'Thank you so much (Bff/n) for living on the top floor'. Basically, running and panting up the stairs wishing the burning sensation in your legs would stop, but you didn't you were dedicated I don't know, why you just wanted to hurry up with the stairs.

Standing on top of the stairs panting my ass off and walking to her door. Before I can knock on the door I see (D/n) head poking out the window giggling. "Are you going to let mommy in?" I ask making a funny face at her. "I can't reach the lock mommy" she laughed. 

"(D/n), c'mon my feet hurt". I say adding a bit of exaggeration. Maybe after 5 seconds I hear the door click and I walk in.

no one's Pov  

As Y/n walked in the apartment feeling the AC immediately hitting her skin and plopping on the couch with a satisfied sigh. "I see someone is energized." (bff/n) says carrying a plate of food putting it on the table. "Mmhm I just got done with my shift thank God I'm quitting that bum ass job." (bff/n) looked at you with a very worried expression. "Are you sure, I mean I know they havent been paying you alot but do you have a plan after you quit?" 

You just looked at her with a reassuring smile. "Dont worry I saved my money up aaannnnddd Im moving." You said taking a bite out of whatever was on the plate. "MOVING WHEREEE AND WITHOUTT TELLING MEEE" she exclaimed almost falling over. "HEY SHUT UP WITH ALL THAT RUCKUS OVER THERE!!!!" I heard an old lady yell next door with some banging going with it "SORRY MRS.ANDERSON.......... So anyways about you moving?" 

"Awww (bff/n) dont worry I promise that it isnt that far from here, I wouldnt wanna have (d/n) away from you." I laughed getting up stretching. "Well I'm bout to get outta here Im TIRED." "Well byee y/n make it home safe I love you" "Byee I love you too. Lets go (D/n) say bye to your auntie" (D/n) runs out of literally nowhere and hugged her "aunt" and went outside the door. 

"WAIT, YOUR SHOES ARE UNTIED. I yell going after her only to see her smiling from ear to ear standing by the door. "Moomm, Im ten I know how to tie my shoes im not a baby" she say bending over to tie them. I rolled my eyes and waited for her to be dont so I can finally walk home.

(d/n) Pov 

'I really didnt tie my shoes I think they look dumb like that I like my own style better. whats the worst that could happen?

[milkovski]

joy list :)!!!! tagged by @iero @metalheadmickey @mishervellous @energievie @celestialmickey thank you!!! ☀

(emojis do not relate to the items on the list do not rack your brains trying to relate them fejjehr they’re just summery)

🏄 going on a trip with sibling in august to a long-time dream spot!! plus i havent had a really extended vacation in a while so that’ll be great

🌴 reading yall’s writing :) been a while since i have been into something enough that i want to read fanfiction, and the fandom is big enough that there’s a lot of good fic to choose from

🏊 i will copy kam and say summer fruit. summer fruit supremacy i love you raspberries even though you scare me i love you watermelon i love you strawberries blueberries and cherries even though i ate too many of all of these and got sick of them a while back adfsdf. nothing so satisfying as cutting a mini watermelon in half and eating it with a spoon

🏖️ i got into mcr a while back thanks to kam and it’s a lot of fun!! i’ve listened to the same 4 or so artists (6 or so albums) for the last 7 years so adding a new artist (which constitutes several albums and a completely new genre) has been fun. drawing stuff for mcr is fun too. i want to draw a tshirt design and print it just for me :) (and share with friends if they want it). also october show october show october showwww

🐚 four day weekend coming up 🙏

🌊 i have been enjoying that we live in the golden age of television tv shows are so good lol. i also like this spate of thoughtful media in recent years thats all been about how people should be good to each other

🍹 writing (or like, thinking about writing FSDF) has been fun :) horror au i am looking at you. witsbg i will finish you i promise dhdd bc b

🌻 my other sibling recently moved into a new house (very happy for them) and consequently i get to enjoy it on saturdays (designated sibling hangout day) which is nice (for me, bc its a great house)

🍉 I’ve been indulging in purchases recently which is nice. Clothes and shoes! Food etc.

🌺 will echo the sentiment thats been “all you people in my phone” :)

🌦️ my cat is lying on my stomach and purring right now :) (had to lift her up temporarily so I could save the draft of this post on my laptop and finish it up on my phone shhdkshd)

I think everyone and their mother has been tagged already (and other usual reasons) so I won’t tag :)

[let--yourself--grow]

UPDATE

hi everyone...

it's been a long journey.. i had ups and downs.. and if im wrightin this is cause a down moment.. well i had a extremely good 2022 year, well a good summer cause i got to my gw but.. in a unhealty way.. i was strict, didnt eat, workout like crazy and we all know, there is a bad come out, when you can't follow the rules, when you gave yourself the "ok" to have a piece of bread or cake or icecream, cause it's not a piece, it's not a small piece, usually ends up with a binge.. since September i have been bad. i didn't follow the rules i havent been strict as i used to be. i miss my old self because she was in control. i know she didn't eat for the whole day cause she had to wear a skirt or a crop top.. but she was beautiful.. i mean she is still beautiful.. but not as it used to be.. now she eats bread, too much cause she can't satisfy herself, she can't say no to chocolate as she used to be, she eats breakfast when she can, but not in a healthy way.. somehow she cannot be satisfied, she does not look at food in a good way, she didnt even before. but before she was goodlooking, she had small boobs, she had small tights, well she didn't like them then, but now when she looks at pictures she cannot see any problem with her body, she was perfect, 45kg is the perfect number, even if the scale was pointing out 48, she was happy with that number, and she was happy cause she knew that she could reach that weight.. well she couldn't.. she start eating like crazy, day after day, and now she cannot look at herself in the mirror, she cannot fit in her favourite pair of black jeans. why would you do that? why did you ruin this journey? why didn't you follow this simple rules? its easy. you are stupid!.

i know i dont fit anymore in those jeans, but i will, not in a unhealty way. i decided i need help. i cant do it by myself. i have tried and this are the results. binging, restrict, , binging... i want to be fine, feel fine in my own skin , in my own body. recovery... i didnt recover from my eating disorder , i restricted so much that i lost moments, food, my period, experiences... but i looked good ,i was good, eating little, being little , i wasnt ashamed of my body as i am now, i loved my body even if i wanted to be smaller.. then why you did get bigger?

[nek-ros]

Oh wait u cant have bread 'cause it makes ur stomach hurt? Man

Um

Can u have like tortilla shells and shit? If yes, make a sandwich/wrap outta that and it should be good enough (I mean to satisfy ur 'I want a sandwich' mood thing)

havent tried eating anything out of tortillas but i feel it should work 🤔

i havent been able to eat bread since getting food poisoning last week. my intestines are nuked skhdksd

[spookfished]

tag meme from @eldritch-elrics thank you :3

Relationship Status:also n/a lol

Favorite Color(s):orange

Favorite Food: this one is always so hard..the butter corn ramen from the ramen place near my house that closed down over covid? i like seafood of all kinds. and fruit in season

Song Stuck in My Head: ifuckingloveyou by big black delta. ive been listening to the daiji revice playlist me n alena and neil made lmfao

Last Thing You Googled: ..risd academic calendar?

Time: it was 7:45am when i started this but i had to go to class so now its 10

Dream Trip: id like to go back to myanmar when things are less um. bad? there? it would be cool to stay there longer so i can get over being sick and maybe try some street food..

Last Thing You Read: problems of translation: onegin in english by nabokov for class lmfao. umm also assorted escapist fanfiction of varying quality

Last Book You Enjoyed Reading: babel by rf kuang!! everybody go read babel by rf kuang

Favorite Thing to Cook/Bake: i miss pryaniki! i havent made panang curry in a while but i think making the paste is really satisfying. ive been thinking wistfully about this really nice fish soup that i made based on this popping tins article.

Favorite Craft to do in Your Freetime: does playing an instrument count as a craft? ive been playing flute for like 8 or 9 years lol. this is what im trying to learn rn! otherwise probably drawing or cooking

Most Niche Dislike: drinking water......that makes me sound really lame though. misinterpretations of cult classic webnovel omniscient readers viewpoint. i used to hate the sound of electric guitars

Opinion on Circuses: cool when theyre not too loud! ive only been once i think a long time ago. yay the spectacle. finn is right though theyre really fun as an aes for games and so on

Do You Have Any Sense of Direction: no :( ive gotten lost for hours before and i also get lost in video games

tagging @aliaoftheknives @cheesey-rice @alakazamlet @moebiusstripmall if you want! also any other mutuals who might feel like it

[faeryarchives]

Thank you for the food! The Azul simp in me is satisfied. Also don't apologize for the lack of posting, life is busy like that, hope your okay now and everythings running somewhat smoothly :)

HIIII omg i am glad you enjoyed the fic ahihi and thank you for the advice 🥺🙏 i just got a summer job with my friends that's why i havent been active lately and i hope you are also doing well and have a nice day 💜