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#i havent felt so elated in so long
saturn-garden · 10 months
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KISSINGER IS DEAD SOMEONE GET THE CRABS IT IS TIME TO RAVE
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devourable · 1 year
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† church boy
[ sfw | tw : religion (not named but heavily implied), sacrilege, potential religious trauma? as well as general yandere content but it’s v tame ]
male yandere x gender neutral reader! only pronoun used for reader is ‘you’. i havent written like this in a very long time so i apologize if this is bad ;_;
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abraham lived a simple life for the majority of his 21 years on this planet. he was born and raised in a religious household, the only son of a wealthy pastor, surrounded by typical bible-thumping folk who taught him that *** was above everything, above him, above the things he loved, and putting anything (or anyone) above his faith would surely result in his damnation. and his whole life, he believed that.
that was… until you entered his life.
it happened at a fundraiser he was volunteering at. it was any other day for the boy, handing out advertisements and chatting with everyone that came and went. an average, mundane event for him where he’d talk about the same things he did every day, smile, wave, everything that was expected of him.
after the last person in his line had left, he looked down to begin organizing his things so he could join the rest of the party. when he was shadowed by someone stepping in front of him again, he expected to see a familiar face — maybe someone that might’ve forgotten something? but when he looked up…
abraham’s breath caught in his throat. he swore the earth had stopped spinning the second your eyes locked.
whether if you were there because you shared the same religion, was dragged there by a friend/family member, or simply because there was free food, he had no clue - but it didn't matter. your looks, the way you moved, the sound of your voice — why was it all so... enchanting?
he couldn’t help the slight stutter in his words as he hastily offered you a pamphlet, quickly introducing himself and inquiring about you. what was your name? were you new to the church? why haven’t you met before?
the soft laugh you emitted as you spoke and the feeling of your skin grazing his felt like fire. and your name... oh, the poor boy didn’t even realize it, but he couldn’t help it — within moments of knowing you, he had grown totally enamored!
abraham found himself hovering by your side for the rest of the event. he was awkward, you’d quickly realize, but it was in that sort of sweet, inexperienced way. he was desperate to know you, to get closer to you, hoping that maybe if he could understand you, he’d figure out how to quell these intense feelings that had built within him — but to you and everyone else, he was simply making sure a new face wasn’t alone during the event. he was just being a good little pastor’s boy! that’s what he told himself too, over and over again.
he was being good by making you laugh. he was being good by giving you his number. and it was good that he grew elated by the idea of getting to see you again after this. he was a good person, so what if he was neglecting his duties to be around you? he did what he was supposed to all the time, surely he could be forgiven just this once.
right?
his obsession with you didn’t take long to blossom after that first meeting. you started to infiltrate every part of his life in one way or another. his prayers became tangled up with thoughts of you. rather than reading the bible, he’d reread the texts between the two of you while he waited for you to respond to them. when he went to church, he found himself scanning the pews in hopes of spotting you among the congregation rather than finding a seat right away. when service began, he couldn’t focus on the preaching taking place because he was too busy thinking of ways to see you again.
despite the utter adoration abraham had grown to feel for you.. at some point, for the first time in his life, he couldn’t help but wonder — was he becoming sinful? was he growing gluttonous for your attention? he couldn’t have been, he had been so devout his entire life! it was fine for him to miss a few services to see you as long as he made up for it later…
he couldn’t tell if you were an angel, as heaven-sent as he felt you to be, or if you were the embodiment of temptation, pulling him away from his faith and beckoning him to sin. were you both? could you be both? with the progression of his obsession with you, his conflicted feelings about his relationship with his faith grew alongside it.
maybe you just weren’t any good for him.
but your name and god seemed to always come up at the same time…
so maybe, it was a sign that he had someone new to worship.
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its-avalon-08 · 2 months
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hearts intertwined (hamilton x sister! driver!rosberg) p17
chapter 17: enemies and crashes
series masterlist avaspeaks - im sooo sorry i havent updated this series in so long. anyway here is pt17!
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It was race day at last. Over the past few weeks Nico and Lewis had become more civil and friendly. Lewis and Y/N had their fair share of moments where they felt as if they were the only ones who existed, hiding behind a facade of nonchalance, the two often sneaked in looks where they would just appreciate one another.
The air crackled with anticipation as the lights flickered off at the start of the race. Y/N, her adrenaline surging, shot off the line, her Red Bull a blur of crimson against the asphalt. To her surprise, she managed to slip past Max, taking the lead into the first corner.
Lewis, watching from his Mercedes, gritted his teeth. He knew he had to reclaim the lead, but Y/N was driving like a possessed woman, her every move calculated and aggressive.
The race was a battle of wits, with Y/N and Lewis trading places at every opportunity. The crowd roared, the tension palpable. Then came the pit stops. Y/N's crew executed a flawless pit stop, sending her back onto the track just behind Lewis.
The two cars emerged from the pit lane neck and neck, a battle royale brewing. Y/N, her eyes locked on Lewis's rear wing, pushed her car to the limit. She was inches away from his bumper, their cars a blur of color.
"Lewis, defensive driving!" his race engineer, Bono, barked through the radio.
"She's trying to take me out!" Lewis retorted, his voice laced with frustration.
Y/N's radio crackled with Liam's voice. "Y/N, focus! This is a dangerous maneuver!"
"I don't give a fuck!" she shouted back, her voice filled with adrenaline. "I'm winning this race! This is not slipping away from me."
Lewis was furious and shouted into his radio, "What the fuck is she doing right now? This will end both our races."
The tension between them reached boiling point as they approached a high-speed corner. Y/N made a daring move, clipping Lewis's front wing. Lewis's car spun out, crashing into the barriers. Nico gasped in shock of how all this had played out. "FUCK FUCK FUCK, What the fuck was that man? No I'm fucking done." Lewis shouted over radio. "Lewis are you okay?" Bono asked anxious. "Im fucking fine. No sorry Bono, I'm- I'm just shocked sorry everyone." Lewis responded. The crowd gasped as flames erupted from the wreckage.
Y/N's heart pounded in her chest. Fuck, fuck, fuck what had she done? But she kept her focus, determined to finish the race. She crossed the finish line, the checkered flag a blur of victory.
As she climbed out of the car, her team swarmed her with congratulations. She was elated, her adrenaline still pumping. The win was sweet, but the way she had achieved it left a bitter taste in her mouth.
She spotted Lewis being helped out of the wreckage, his face a mask of anger. She looked away, guilt gnawing at her conscience. But deep down, a part of her felt a strange sense of satisfaction. She had won, and she had beaten Lewis at his own game.
The post-race celebrations were muted, the shadow of the crash hanging over the paddock. Y/N avoided Lewis's gaze, her heart pounding with a mixture of triumph and remorse.
Lewis, meanwhile, stood alone, his face a mask of fury. He watched as Y/N celebrated with her team, a pang of jealousy piercing through his anger. He had lost the race, but more importantly, he had lost something else – respect for Y/N.
The night stretched ahead, a long and lonely one for both of them. The victory had come at a price, and the consequences would linger long after the champagne had dried.
The post-race press conference was a tense affair. Y/N had already given her interview, her victory still ringing in her ears. Now it was Lewis's turn to face the music.
The first few questions were standard fare, about the race conditions and his car's performance. But then, it happened.
"Lewis," a reporter began, a mischievous glint in her eye, "there was a particularly aggressive move from Y/N on lap twenty-three. Can you comment on that?"
Lewis's face hardened. His jaw clenched, and his eyes flashed with anger. "Aggressive? That was reckless," he spat out, his voice low and dangerous. "She took me out of the race. That's not racing, that's dangerous."
The room fell silent, the tension palpable. The reporter pressed on. "Y/N has a reputation for being a fierce competitor. Do you think that crossed the line today?"
Lewis leaned forward, his eyes boring into the reporter's. "I don't think she cares about lines," he growled. "All she cares about is winning, at any cost."
The room was electric. Y/N, watching the interview from her team's hospitality suite, felt a cold dread wash over her. She had known her move was risky, but Lewis was a fierce driver too. Why was he acting like he hasn't done this often? He did it to Nico more than once.
The reporter pressed further, but Lewis had retreated into a shell of fury. His answers were curt, his tone clipped. It was clear that the incident had left a bitter taste in his mouth, and he wasn't afraid to let everyone know.
As the interview ended, Lewis stormed out of the room, his face a mask of anger. The world could see the animosity between the two drivers, and the rivalry had taken a dangerous turn.
--
The paddock was abuzz with post-race analysis. Y/N, still riding the high of her victory, was surrounded by her team, their laughter and congratulations a welcome antidote to the tension that had gripped the race.
Then, she saw him. Lewis was standing alone, a solitary figure amidst the bustling crowd. Their eyes met, a silent battleground of unspoken words and simmering emotions.
Mustering her courage, Y/N walked towards him. The closer she got, the more she could see the anger etched on his face. It was a stark contrast to the usual composed demeanor he was known for.
"Lewis," she began, her voice barely a whisper.
He turned to face her, his eyes cold and distant. "Y/N," he replied, the words dripping with frost.
The silence that followed was heavy, laden with the unspoken accusations and recriminations.
"I won," Y/N stated simply, her voice steady.
Lewis scoffed. "By taking me out."
"It was a racing incident," Y/N retorted, her voice rising slightly. "You should know better than anyone what it's like to be on the receiving end of a tough move."
Lewis's jaw clenched. "But you took it too far," he countered. "You could have caused a serious accident."
Y/N looked at him, her eyes challenging. "Racing is dangerous, Lewis. That's the risk we take. I made a calculated move, and it paid off."
A bitter laugh escaped his lips. "Calculated? Or desperate?"
Y/N's anger flared. "Desperate? I was in the lead! You were trying to overtake me on the inside. I had to defend my position."
Lewis took a step closer, his voice low and menacing. "I would never do that to you, Y/N. Never."
The words hung in the air, a stark contrast to the fierce competition they had displayed on the track. Y/N felt a pang of guilt, but she quickly pushed it aside. She wasn't going to apologize for winning.
"But you've done it to people before Lewis. You did it to my brother. Don't act like you're a great saint, because truly you. are. not. Actions speak louder than words, Lewis," she replied coldly. "You'll just have to learn to accept it. We were racing, I was faster, I won. That's that"
With that, she turned and walked away, leaving Lewis alone with his thoughts. Lewis spoke up, "You're making enemies Y/N. And regardless of what I have done, I would have never dared to risk your life." Saying so he walked away. The victory tasted bittersweet, the adrenaline rush replaced by a growing sense of unease.
Y/N was swarmed by Max, who finished P2, her brother, Christian and more, all congratulating her. But she felt a metallic taste in her mouth. Was it guilt or something far more dangerous?
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inktoony · 26 days
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I havent actually written in ages and havent watched emh in ages either so sorry if Habit is out of character. Everything is within my own AU.
Fresh Air
This is NOT shipping in any way.
Characters: Habit, Eyeless Jack
-▪︎-▪︎-
It was always nice to get some fresh air. Most of the time anyways.
The bunker wasn't bad, since it was only Jack, Tim, Brian, and now Toby. Though, Jack had his own reservations about Slender making a literal kid a proxy. Regardless, at least he doesn't need to teach the kid everything. Tim is doing that just fine.
Cooped up in a tree, his long legs tangled from a particularly thick branch, Jack could only hear the silence noises of the night.
After maybe 20 minutes, there was a rustle nearby, and then another. A soft scampering up the tree he's in.
Likely a squirrel, though it's rare that wild animals approached him. Always had a weird vibe about him, which sucked since he would want a pet one day.
A soft click left his tongue, and the world seems anew. Everything around him, patches within silhouettes, variations of red, green and blue.
He turned his head, and with another click, was met with a deep red near his face. He almost fell off the damn branch, utterly startled.
Whatever it was, its ears pinned back and it backed away. But it always pointed at him, no matter what.
He knew what it was.
“Hey!”
And that's what you hate to hear.
“Habit.” Jack answered.
“Sure am! Come on down, buddy, I ain't rescuing you from there.” Habit was clearly elated to see the guy.
Jack couldn't be further from that. And didn't move.
“Get down.” Habit repeated, on the verge of yelling if he had to repeat himself again. Jack listened immediately.
“Good” and the ‘friend’ voice returned.
Habit was eager to invade Jack's space, though the host Habit was using barely reached his shoulder. 
“This is proxy territory.” Jack knew better not to be outwardly hostile, but he wasn't going to be nice either.
“What, you think I don't know that? I don't give a shit about the lanky freak” Habit paused, and a grin appeared on his face. “Well, I care about this lanky freak.” He gave Jack a light shove, meaning to be playful but it just gave the taller guy a spike in heartbeat. “The wind might blow you away if you aren't careful!”
“What do you,, want?” Jack asked simply, not reacting to his joke. Habit took offense, but he got the picture.
“You know what I want.”
“The answer is still no.”
Habit frowned, his tone turning sour. “And you're not gonna be useful to him forever. That demon schtick has the downside of eating human meat” 
Habit circled him, like a predator. With a hand on Jack's shoulder, one he definitely had to reach his arm for, he sighed. “I'm not going to do that, buddy. I could probably reverse that little curse or something of yours! Don't you want that?”
 He gave him a little shake. “You be my little guy, I sometimes take over your body to ruin all relationships, as if you have any to begin with, have a few human right violations, and you get to live a normal life! Even if I cant take away the cannibalism thing, I can at least eat for you. I've done it before, I don't mind doing it for a while just to get a proper guy on my side”
“No” Jack said without hesitation.
After all that talk, Habit was just left with another rejection. He huffed, shoving Jack forward and his heat signature walking off, the dog-rabbit thing following behind. 
Once they both left, Jack felt a relief to hear a familiar static once again.
His heart was racing, and he needed to clench at his own hoodie to ground himself. He slowly turned, being met with a silhouette of static before he even clicked his tongue, taller than himself.
It offered a hand, and he took it. 
That was enough fresh air for the night.
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im so down bad rn
God the way they literally say ANYTHING to me just has me over here kicking my feet and giggling like a girl who got her crush to go with her to prom. They plague my mind at literally every moment throughout the day and THEY WERE IN MY DREAMS THE LAST FEW NIGHTS! Goodness i just want them to talk about anything that goes on in their silly little mind, and tell me about it. god they just rant about the shit their into and it has me in a literal fucking chokehold and makes me wanna commit vehicular manslaughter against orphans in the most loving way.
Me and them have been playing on VrChat together the past few days and its been so long since i genuinely felt this way about someone. They made me laugh so hard i sounded like a dying dolphin and holy shit i havent laughed like that IN TWO YEARS. They make mr so inexplicably happy whenever i get a notification from them on discord or instagram and the fact that [Runa] makes me so eager to get up in the morning and get ready is such a lovely feeling to have again. God, we havent known eachother or been dating for that long but just the thought of being able to call them mine makes me burst with elation and want to cry positively.
The way that they were so excited when a reference to Jurassic Park was made in The Tenth Floor: Part 2 filled my heart with so much joy i felt like i was going to explode. I just sat there with the dorkiest smile staring at their avatar, unable to do anything but agree with them as they got all happy. Good god, im positive this is love. Not the fake highschool love you do to get over someone, but one where you cherish the other person so much that it burns you to their core whenever they do anything and you just have to stop and admire their cute little goofy antics.
We have matching avatars in VrChat too which literally just adds fuel to the fire which is known as my heart in this case. The fact that they even wanted to spend time like that with me makes my heart ache. Everytime they reference something i told them in the past makes my knees feel like jello and my words get stuck in my throat. Nobody has ever made me feel this passionate about them before, and goodness gracious it kills me. Im on the edge of my seat whenever they start talking, and i never ever ever want that to change. One day i swear i will drive to their fucking house, despite living in different states, with as many gifts as i can possibly muster to bring. Ill give them my heart and soul.
But when I say this, I mean it fully. I would do anything for them. I want to have those childishly cheesy dates people envy. I would take them to every beautiful place and i severely want to make them feel so special about themself. If they were feeling sad i would bend over backwards just to get them feeling better, no matter the price. Goodness, i really really really just want the best for them. They deserve the world.
Me and them mainly talk on discord and the conversations we have fill my heart with so much admiration it kills me. One day I felt like I was dying mentally, and despite it being a big anniversary for them and their friend, they still checked in on me and wanted to make sure I was fine. Whenever we play games they make me freeze with how intelligent they are, and it makes me melt inside and i love that so much. Im literally crying as i write this because they make me feel so connected to this world. Ive always been disconnected and being able to feel complete again makes me so damn happy.
They never shame me for anything I say, and only tease lightly. We fit so well together, and I truly hope they feel that too. You make me so so happy, i genuinely hope you know that. Youve brightened up my life and im so thankful for that my nerdy tall ass hot sauce packet.
I love you so much Runa <3
- A.H.
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cffeeluv · 2 years
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Hello :)) its my birthday today! Can i ask a little fanfic abt foxybro Michael afton taking out his s/o on a date fluff?
Take ur time and thank u :)))
hi !! and happy bday!!!! (i hope i havent missed it 🥹) i hope u had a great day!!! & yes ofc ! this is too cute 🤍(both are 18)
no reader gender mentioned <3
today was your birthday, and whilst you never really bothered with them before, this year was some what different, it was the first birthday you had in which you had a boyfriend - michael. you woke up in the morning to a phone flooded with texts from your friends and family, but you immediately opened michaels first, just out of sheer habit.
“happy birthday my love! i have a surprise for you later, be ready for 7 x”
you read the message over and over, your face heating up and butterflies erupting in your stomach, you had no idea what it could be, but you were beyond excited to be spending time with your boyfriend.
6.30 rolled around, you felt as if the day had dragged in because you couldn’t wait to see michael. during the day your birthday was spent with your close family, and whilst you loved spending time with them, you only had one person in your mind. you were now getting ready in your room waiting for michael to come and pick you up, feeling sick with nerves but in the best possible way. you weren’t sure what to wear, so you played it safe with something you were comfortable in, but still fancy enough for a special occasion. you were ready with 5 minutes to spare, looking at yourself in the mirror pondering if you looked okay. michael pulled up outside, beeping the horn of his car to alert you he was outside. you wasted absolutely no time in bolting out the front door, shouting a half hearted “goodbye” to your parents, not letting them get in the way to stop and ask 100 questions.
you got into michaels car, the smell of his cologne overpowered your nostrils, not that you ever had a problem with this, to you it felt like home. yourself and michael looked at one another, with massive smiles painted on your faces.
“you look beautiful” he said, leaning in to plant a soft kiss on your cheek. “i have something for you”. he reaches to the backseats and pulls through a gift bag, placing it on your lap. you clasped your hands, resting them against your chest. “michael you didn’t need to” you stated, your heart full of love. you dug through the bag and pulled out a box, you glanced over to him before opening it. it was a simple silver necklace, but when you lifted it out the box, you had clocked that your and michael’s initials had been put on the delicate chain.
“i bought the charms myself, it was a pain trying to get them on and make them stay” he joked. “happy birthday my love”. you were beyond elated. you thanked him over and over, kissing him and pulling him into the tightest hug you could possible give, you absolutely loved it, infact, that was an understatement, you couldn’t find the words. you handed the necklace to michael and turned around, lifting your hair up and signalling for him to put it on. “beautiful” michael said kissing you once more before starting the car and driving off.
you had no idea where he was taking you, it wasn’t too long of a journey, but he pulled into a restaurant you weren’t too familiar with. you both entered the restaurant and the waiter greeted you both at the door, after checking the reservation the waiter led you both to the table. it was decorated with tiny rose petals and candles, it was in a secluded part of the restaurant, so it was just the both of you to spend time with one another. “oh, michael” you began “this is perfect” you felt as if you could cry out of happiness, you had never experienced something like this before, and you were so happy to be spending it with michael. michael shook his head “you deserve the world”
i hope this is okay anon 🥹! i hope you had a fabulous day 💓
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ohheyitsokay · 3 years
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Hi lovely Elle! Congratulations on your milestone, my friend! I’m so excited for you; your writing is always absolutely immaculate and makes my heart sing, and your compassion and integrity shine through every single thing you produce. I can’t wait to see what you create next! For the celebration, may I please request something with my favourite, Rex? For the soulmate AU, I’d be happy with whichever one you feel works best (I don’t know very much about them sorry 🙈) thank you my love and congrats again! x
hello my dear! such high praise, especially from someone as lovely and talented as you! I definitely used this as an excuse to watch videos of Rex being... Rex, since I havent written him before 😌 and obviously now I'm swooning so
I hope you enjoy!
warnings: cannon-typical angst / violence, yearning, fluff, elle writing yet another new character
<<
soulmate requests / follower celebration
>>
Clones did get to see colors. Not really, anyway, just the muted, modulated ones their buckets provided - not the ones that brought grown men to their knees.
The ones that made elation run through a person's veins and completion paint the world in light.
The soulmate colors.
Clones didnt get to see them, because clones weren't supposed have soulmates. Why would they? Their very existence was specifically curated not to encourage them to find themselves, not to go on adventures, or develop dreams, and certainly not to fall in love.
Still, when he stood at the corner of the mess hall, and watched his brothers quarrel and laugh, with their uncontrollable hair and skin spattered with scars, Rex wondered.
Because the more time he spent, the more he saw new painted patterns and heard annoying inside jokes, the more he thought somewhere in all those calculations, they got it wrong. They were individuals, they went on adventures, and had different dreams.
So, like scuffs collecting on shiny plastoid armor, a new determination scratched a mark somewhere deep inside him. If his brothers could be and do all that they already had? Love, even, was not quite so unrealistic.
He didnt talk about colors much - none of them did, and he of all people rarely had the time. But he thought about them more than he should, ached for them during quiet nights alone in his bunk.
The feeling was frusterating, something unreasonable to share, impossible to explain, so as time flew on, he learned to bury it. It felt like a lifetime ago when he learned to guard his mind and control his thoughts around his jedi generals. Still, there was a time when he - his friend and jedi - had been distracted, gazing into his certain someone's eyes, that Rex had watched. And just for a moment, his mind had slipped.
Another scratch in his chest, wanting - wanting - what? Just someone to look at, to really see, and... someone who would see him, too. That's all he wanted. It was a selfish thought, hot and fierce, seering his careful facade, branding another scuff before he could shake it away.
-
When he first saw you, even through his aging helmet, you were the most beautiful thing he had ever seen.
You were walking, talking to someone, not relevant to his mission, but important and he wanted to walk after you, to be the one you were talking to, but... then you were gone.
Someone else asked who you were and he felt suddenly possessive, a strange feeling immediately followed by confusion. It was an illogical response, by all accounts, you had never even met before.
And then someone else answered - a trusted friend of Senator Amidala's, and he felt relief, that he hadn't been forced to choose looking foolish by asking or the much worse option: not knowing.
And it was another illogical response.
Weeks went by, stealing glimpses of you floating through the hall, and pondering his responses in his meager free time. Was there a reason he wanted to smooth the line between your brows? Or have his arm be the one you tucked your hands into as you climbed the stairs in your heavy robes?
There shouldnt have been. But when you appeared in front of him, your lovely eyes wide and thoughtful, here shouldnt have been a reason his brain short circuited, either. But it did - images of you appeared before him: you kissing his cheek lashes fluttering as you made him promise to stay alive, your head against his chest plate as your breaths thickened with peace and his own were full of pride. You, gasping his name as your hands grasped desperately against his skin, holding onto him as he took you for his and his alone.
Rex had never been quite so dysfunctional in his entire life. But before he could collect himself, you ducked your head and ran.
-
There were conversations Rex had never indulged before, at the bar, or between his brothers whenever they had a moment. Conversations about love and colors and... soulmates. And it had seemed selfish to listen, selfish to participate, like it would only add to his ache, and steal from his duty. Until you.
Each time he turned to see you watching him, before your eyes would widen guiltily and you'd turn your head in embarrassment, his resolve slipped away. He was already indulging, by stealing his own glances at you, and through the intentness at which he listened beyond your educated opinions for your laugh.
And when you tripped, walking quickly through a corridor opposite of him, and grabbed his arm, holding him like he could keep you steady, it snapped.
Then those conversations became like water - they were everywhere and he craved them like he needed it to survive.
"What, really?" As always, he tried to seem only politely interested.
"Honest, we only talk for a bit -"
"And admittedly he'd been drinking, but -"
"Yeah, they seemed in love. Way more than just fucking, he was acting stupid and happy."
"It was nice, you know? A vod looking like a normal dude -"
"- kept kissing and -"
" - talking about colors - "
Rex nodded and slipped away.
After long missions, his muscles would ache with scrapes and bruises, but he always told the shinies it prepared himself for the next one. He was done collecting aches - he wanted it. Soulmates or not, he wanted you.
-
The opportunity came sooner than expected, in long moments after a meeting had dissolved sooner than expected.
The two of you were left alone looking over a projection, and the convenience spurred his bravery.
"You do well, with all those idiots." Brave, certainly, but smooth? Not as much. You looked surprised and pleased at his praise, and pride shot through him.
"Thank you, I..." You glanced at him, and he watched your eyes trace over his marks, along the lines of his armor and then into his visor. Hands fiddling with a little dark grey pendant around your neck, you seemed like you were building courage.
"I'm sorry I've been avoiding you."
His head tilted. You had been avoiding... him? Him, specifically? Maybe Rex shouldve felt upset, but the definitive proof that you knew who he was, lit his whole body on fire.
"Why have you been avoiding me?"
"You're so admirable! And capable and," you turned away, shoulders raising a bit as you confessed - "and there's something about you that's just..."
He'd never wanted someone to finish a sentence more. It seemed impossible how much he ached for you, how right you seemed for him, how it seemed like maybe you agreed, but he had defied a world of impossibilities.
"I didnt want to seem too eager," your voice was but a whisper. Hope fueled his heat, filling his armor until it felt too much to bear.
Pulling off his helmet, Rex reached for you, saying, "You couldn't -" before his words cut off.
You looking him face to face and his whole world changed in a single moment.
"- Mesh'la."
The pendant was... a color that matched the way rain felt, and the paint on his armour, brighter than he'd thought. You were his.
And you were wearing it, looking like a dream, staring at him like you'd never seen a man like him before. And... you hadnt.
As he grabbed your hands, and your fingers fit inbetween his own, Rex knew you hadn't. Because he as in color, and he was yours.
<<
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angelicmichael · 4 years
Text
Hoax - Prologue
Michael Langdon x Mallory
Summary: After failing to kill murder house Michael; Mallory must travel back in time to Sojourn era to try again. However; she finds to her horrific discovery that jumping through time repeatedly does not come without its consequences.
Words: 3.0k+
Warnings: Death, They both almost die (or do die) so.. a lot of describing wounds and nearly dying and that jazz ✌🏻, major wounds, lowkey a dark fic, Mallory discusses wanting to kill Michael and finds celebrates it??, angst, Mallory goes and sees his dead body, blood
A/N: this takes place right after Mallory drives away from Michael in the finale btw!! I literally didnt intend on making it this dark but it just happened LOL. I feel like most of the dark stuff is vague so.. it should still be chill. This is the first time ive written millory/character x character so please go easy on me!! I also tried to follow canon and stay accurate to details the best I could but knowing me I probably fucked up somehow LMAO but enjoy 💖💖 major plot twist is coming in the next chapter btw! Also Mallorys thots are italicized.
As soon as Mallory drove away; she knew nearly immeadietly that it was too good to be true. Things could never be this fucking easy.
She felt a pit in her stomach almost instantaneously once she was in the year 2015; Even though she couldnt decipher if the anxiety was a warning or something else.. She continued on with the dark destiny she was put on this earth to fulfull.. to kill the antichrist.
Even though she was fully aware of this; and had come to terms with what she had to do - she learned the hard way that it didnt seem to make things easier at all; like how she dreamed it would. Although, even now as she continued to speed away from the infamous 'murder house', the drop in her stomach seemed to only grow; along with her self doubt.
Was he really dead??
Did I really do it??
She knew that the answer to both of those questions should be yes; but the longer she remained driving in her car, getting farther and farther away from where the incident had occured.. she knew something was wrong.
Mallory suddenly jolted the steering wheel into a sharp left; continuing to turn it until she was doing U-Turn.. She couldnt help but to feel completly bewildered at her own actions - never doing something so impulsive, like going back to a crime scene let alone commit murder, in her life.
Although Mallory felt a bit disgusted with her recent previous actions; she couldnt help but imagine how disgusted she would feel with herself if she didnt pull this off. She mulled over the previous thoughts she had had about this moment and how dreamed it would feel; she thought she would feel joy, elated, and at peace but.. instead she still felt as if she was being suffocated by his presence.
He wasnt gone. Not yet.
She pressed her foot down on the gas, she knew she hadn't gone too far away from Michael's residence yet it seemed as if it was a millenia away. The task she was supposed to complete was starting to seem more and more increasingly impossible the less distance was put between them.
If running him over with a car three times wasnt enough to kill him, whose to say anything else would? What if Constance had brought him inside?? What if she was still out there with him?? Mourning?
Mallory wasnt a monster; she wasnt going to tear away a dying boy from his grandmother in his (hopefully) final moments, even if he was the antichrist.
She felt as if she was a total loss for what to do; which made her grow sick to her stomach because she knew that was a cruel form of denial. She was destined for this moment; every moment thus far had led up to this.. so why did she feel like such a failure? Her thoughts grew more foggy and distant with panic; her throat became entirely dry as she slowed the car down. The murder house now in view; the first thing she noticed.
The red bricks and stained glass windows shined brightly in the sun. The house, which Mallory was sure typically looked beautiful, radiated a terrifying aura.. even more so this time versus when she was here only a mere minutes ago. The expanse and exterior of the house was intimidating; it held a certain danger to it that she couldnt pinpoint her finger on where the source came from.. it certainly was not Michael. Mallory knew that even if he wasnt dead; his powers would fade out for atleast a few minutes from being so wounded.
Mallory stopped the car once she saw Michael's dead body; which still resided in the middle of the road. Her feelings of panic and nausea only amplified once she saw his body -  her gaze lingering upon it. She approached him with no hesitation; she could nearly feel that he was gone.. his spirit momentarily missing.. somewhere else.
She studied him carefully and nearly pitifully as she crouched down to kneel next to his body. His body was littered and splattered with bright red wounds. His pants looked as if they were dip dyed in red paint; His once pale skin along with the majority of his clothes was covered in a bright red splatter. Long, dark red lacerations decorated his face. His mouth was still agape; his once white teeth were coated in the same shade of red his clothes were.
Even though he looked absolutely horrible; Mallory still felt absolutely no remorse for the antichrist. Knowing what he would become, and his sick ways of manipulation deserved no mercy. However, knowing only seconds ago he was nothing but a mere bloody, suffering child.. she couldnt help but to not fight the tears she felt budding at her eyes; letting one slide down her cheek before quickly wiping it away - she knew it was naive to assume she wasnt being watched.
Mallory wasnt stupid - she knew her powers and what she was capable of, like the back of her hand by now. The past few months practically consisted of her testing and expanding on her limits... She knew that healing Michael in this exact moment wasnt out of the question. In fact, it almost seemed to be more difficult to restrain herself from healing him.. but she knew better.
He deserves to fucking suffer. He deserved to rot in his personal hell; wherever that may be.
She couldnt help but to nearly laugh at the thought that he finally got what was fucking coming to him.
Mallory could feel herself shaking with how close she was to Michael now. She couldnt stand how he made her feel when they were this close - almost touching.
She now was kneeling next to his body on the concrete, her knees aching from the rough surface but she couldnt go just yet. Not when she still had no fucking clue where to go from here.
The world seemed as if it came to stand still; nothing seemed like it existed outside of the small bubble that Mallory felt her and Michael were suddenly trapped in.. The birds stopped singing, no cars happened to drive by.. everything just stopped.
All the spirits and souls that Mallory could feel that were trapped within the grounds of the house, didnt bother to make a appearance either. But she knew they were still there... she could still feel their eyes on her. Watching; waiting.
The sun's warmth, which normally Mallory chose to bask in, was starting to make her itch. She could feel her skin start to moisten with sweat.. Instinctively she knew that her sudden newfound state of being uncomfortable was her cue to leave... To go where though? She wasnt sure.
Why am I still here? If everything had happened correctly; if I really killed him.. then why havent I woken up yet??
Mallory continued to stare at him grimly; not quite brave enough to speak but still managing to maintain the courage to sit by him and look at the damage she caused. The most jarring feature of Michael's current appearance would be his eyes. Mallory couldnt help but to stare at them; and it certainly wasnt because they were beautiful.
His once vibrant, sky blue, irises were now starting to look oddly dull. A faint, milky white color looked as if it were painted over them instead.
His skin was now a bruised white; Mallory shakily extended out her hand - pressing the back of her knuckles softly to his forearm. She wanted to see how cold his body was; and when she made contact - she pulled her hand back so fast as if it had been burned. She hissed, the coolness of his skin stunned her. She stared at his body intensely - shocked that she even dared to touch him, let alone even stick around for this long. 
The sounds Michael started to make is what finally drove Mallory to wake up out her near trance she found herself amidst in and to realize the reality of the situation. After minutes of silence and stillness, and sure death, Michael's chest finally started to move. The amount at which his chest moved was nearly minuscule at first; but he was recovering rather quickly.. too fucking quickly for Mallorys liking.
It was almost sickly ironic how Mallorys chest started to move faster and faster as soon as Michael's did; she couldn't help but to feel entirely panicked. The rest of her emotions; her thoughts; her feelings; everything that used to make up her was now fleeting.. rapidly leaving until as she could focus on was the oxygen briskly escaping her.
She watched the color from his skin start to return; the off putting stark whiteness leaving and a very subtle pink gracing his skin tone. More noticeably; she observed how the color in his lips and eyes returned back.. almost appearing normal.
She unconsciously found herself rising; panic still occupying all of her senses. She quickly unfolded her legs and steadied herself as she stood up.. One thought and one thought only rang through her mind like a sick mantra..
I need to get the fuck out of here.
Mallory tried to gasp as she suddenly felt her throat grow incredibly dry; she let out a desperate dry cough. Her eyes started to tear up unwillingly as she felt a enormous amount of self doubt suddenly surge into the core of her being - the feeling slipping momentarily into her soul.
The world around her began to spin and melt away simultaneously; until she felt her physical body melt away from Michael and the Murder House incredibly rapidly before she could even fully process what was happening.
She felt the harsh coldness of the bath tub water for a split second before she emerged; the black water engulfing her as she stayed partially concealed within the water. Immeadietly she found herself gasping and gagging on her tongue from not being able to breath possibly fast enough... The next thing she felt was otherworldly pain. She felt so much fucking pain.
Mallory gripped the edge of the bathtub until her fingertips turned white and her nails threatened to split. She stayed like that for a moment; spitting and gasping, trying to find a way to consume as much oxygen as possible while managing the nearly unimaginable pain. Her entire body throbbed but her eyes felt a different pain; a sickly stinging.
Keeping her posture and preventing herself from slipping entirely back into the black water was a fucking mission in itself, she quickly learned. She didnt even bother to pretend to be quiet.. Her breaths and groans were far too loud to even begin to ignore.
Is Michael still alive?  Where is Myrtle?
Mallorys lungs seemed to return to normal capacity after a while, her gasping decreased until she was utterly and completely quiet. She arose from the water as quietly as she possibly could, biting her lip to prevent making any additional noise from the sudden cold air she felt against her body.. stinging and torturous..
Her eyes still ached, bringing her hands instinctively to her eyes to stop the pain - she realized ones of her hands was still balled into a fist.. holding onto something.
Was that.. is that MICHAELS hair??
Mallory stared at the once curly, perfectly golden strands of hair that lie in her balled up fist in complete horror - it was now a dark red from the blood that had washed off her skin and into the water.
There was no way this was HIS hair. It had to be someone elses; anyone elses! She refused to believe that she was holding onto anything that belonged or had to do with Michael... complete disgust and delirium rendered her from thinking that.
Her first instinct was to drop the hair; but something told her to keep holding onto the lock, it would only serve her well in the future.
Her vision was inky with blood; dark red clouding her vision and making her feel even more impaired and utterly hopeless then she already felt.. even with the large wound still gaping and bleeding from her stomach. Her stomach wound made her entire body ache, trying to stay conscious was a fight within itself.
It happened again. I failed.
She wasnt sure if she was just being cynical or if her thoughts were even to be trusted anymore when she was in this state.. she only knew she wanted this horrible nightmare to be fucking over with already. She wanted to wake up in Robichauxs and see her sisters; Misty, Madison, Queenie, Zoe and more than anyone.. Cordelia... Oh fuck.
Cordelia... She was still dead.. because of me.
Mallory blinked slowly a few times; taking her free hand and wiping as much blood away from her face and eyes as she could - just enough so she could fully take in her surroundings.
If she could feel her stomach; she was sure she would feel it drop because as much as she looked, she saw no one. Absolutely no one. Tears slipped down her cheeks but they werent bloody anymore. She knew she was completely fucked; he had her cornered.
Well not literally anyways. He still managed to lurk somewhere within the vast empty walls of Outpost Three; most likely looking for her.. but he had to know she was fatally wounded.. right? 
That's when out of the thick silenceness, she heard the first sign of life. Loud; but distant heavy footsteps.
Michael.
She knew she was fucked right away. She could almost feel his spirit itself within Hawthorne; the feeling slowly flowing to her until it forced her to be frozen. Petrified, still sopping wet and with some left over blood dripping off her chin - she knew what she had to do.. and she only had seconds to do it. Mallory knew he was approaching closer and closer the longer she stood docile in the bathtub.. like a idiot.
She took deep, heavy breaths. Fully; for the first time, cherishing the feeling of oxygen in her lungs - knowing that she very well might not make it out alive. Preforming time travel once alone was a enormous feat; but she had already done it twice.. but three times?
The thought simultaneously scared and excited her; she continued take deep breaths before relaxing. Closing her eyes and focusing; searching for a moment in Michael's history to go back too.
There had to be another time Michael was weak besides when he was with Constance at the murder house.. Another time that he felt abandoned.. lost.. confused..
She swallowed as she felt and focused on the soft strands of hair that she held onto; trying to search desperately for the answer that she needed as she took the next step and plunged herself under the water, first barely managing to weakly whisper, "tempus infinituum".
The water tore at her skin as she felt herself letting go from the past reality... slowly yet rapidly her senses seemed to all melt away at once before she was floating- until nothing.
Suddenly Mallory opened her eyes, blinking as she kept calm as she adjusted to her new surroundings.. an open, nearly empty forest was what welcomed her as she slowly spun around.
The smell of pine leaves and the heavy scent of the forest consumed her senses. She first felt calm and at peace; the forest was beautiful. She almost felt tempted to forget about what she came here to do and to lose herself within the sea of greenery but.. something was terribly wrong.
More so; someone was here.
Mallory first stood still; puzzled as to why she was now standing in a vacant forest with pine needles at her feet.
She didnt dare say a word out loud, just in case, but she knew she was waiting for something before she dared to take a step.. she was waiting for a sign. She didnt bat a eye when she felt a soft, warm breeze tousle her hair forward. She felt it continue to crash against her body - almost like soft waves crashing upon rocks. She felt it on her warm skin; her skin getting goosebumps as she knew what this meant. She was getting her sign.
This is it. Is he here?
Mallory giggled at the mere thought; the anticipation and glee of imagining how this nightmare perhaps could be over in the near future was making her experience true euphoria.
She began to walk through the forest; passing several trees as she searched for what she was yearning for. The breeze was far gone by now but she knew to keep going; to keep looking. She looked at the forest landscape that lie ahead of her; a sea of moss and blended greens and blues. The forest didnt have the same magic it typically held though; something was missing.
It was because she was getting closer to him.
Mallory had to suppress a scream as she suddenly felt herself step on something that wasnt the forest floor. She felt a painful shiver run directly down her spine, almost as if someone was running a blade down her back. She was becoming consumed with panic once more; and with the sudden realization what was happening.. What this meant.
It was pure reflex which caused her to take a step back; even before she had the opportunity to look down and confirm her suspicions, she knew exactly what she had stepped on. A body.
She quickly looked down at what she had stepped on - not able to take the anonymity of the individual any longer.. and of course..
I fucking knew it.
She recognized who it was immeadietly, curly blonde hair that was mangled with dirt and a typical black outfit.. it was too easy to guess the identity of the body. He was face down, his body sprawled out unnaturally and in a uncomfortable manner..
It was once again; Michael Langdon.
Taglist: @mina672 @michaellangdonstanaccount @langdonsexual @jimmason @blakewaterxx @dark-mei-rose @9layerdevilfoodcake @prophecy-is-inevitable @matildaofoz @beautyiswithinchaos @frenchlangdon @beyond-repentance @lizzy-claire-fandom
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Text
The night Sherlock returns to John, is the same night Sherlock returns to 221B, alone.
Sherlock hadn't realized that things would be so different. It was a perfectly logical prediction that he'd waltz right back into crime-fighting and John would make a beeline to follow him. Nevertheless, he sat in his chair, in the faint glow of his lamp, feeling melancholic, just like he used to.
"But so much has changed, hasn't it?", Sherlock observed, his thoughts now continuing themselves aloud, "John definitely has. He seemed to give not a care in the world about our- MY case... The volcanic temper, that's not new. A short fuse fit for a short man... I suppose I have hurt him though."
Utilizing his mind palace, Sherlock replays the moment he first saw John again. Grisly moustache, nervous ticks, an uncharacteristic mundanity with him. And yet, though unfamiliar he appeared, Sherlock recognized him immediately as his dear friend. The person who stayed with him when all others had turned away. The soldier who protected him without a moment's hesitation. The doctor who repaired his, well, "behavioral slip-ups". The man who gave out a kindness unlike any he'd had ever seen. Such a strong heart, yet so vulnerable and afraid-
His stream of consciousness came to an abrupt halt when he noticed his quickened heart beat. His cheeks were significantly warmer than they were minutes ago.
It took but two seconds. Two seconds for it all to come crashing into him.
"No... no... he's my friend. A good friend. It's always the two of us, nothing has changed!"
His heart drummed louder.
"No. Nonono.... I-I couldnt have... Not me!", Sherlock scoffed airily, "I havent!... have i?..."
Intrusive images of John's smile seeped through into his brain and his heart thundered even louder and even harder.
"... please, it cant be...", the frightened man pleaded, to everything and nothing at all at the same time.
Confused, he delved deep into his mind palace to show himself the proof he needed that this wasn't what he feared it was. He flipped through their first day as flatmates, all their cases, their fights. Jennifer Wilson, Soo Lin Yow, Carl Powers, Irene Adler, Henry Knight. But those memories were... contaminated... they were different. John was different. All at once he seemed so loyal and caring, and sensitive and brave. Sherlock lost control of his mental slideshow and was now trapped inside his head with the very thing he'd been railing against his entire life...
"No... please! I couldnt have... I-"
Before his very eyes, his life in this flat flew. John's first laugh with him, his relentless compliments, his unwavering loyalty. His eerie smile when he's angry, his witty sarcasm, his sensitive manner. John has saved his life countless times and for once in his life, Sherlock hadn't the good sense to comprehend it.
But, this sensation, wasnt actually unfamiliar at all. It seemed as though his body recognized these palpitations of the heart. As if his body caught on quicker than Sherlock did that...
In shattering horror, with no defences left to lay, he uttered brokenly into the silence.
"I've fallen in love with him"
And not only that, but he appeared to have loved him long before now. This wasnt right, he isnt one to harbor feelings for someone, especially not romantically. He must stay above it all. He should know better. Love is only a catalyst the heart uses to destroy itself, like a candle that only exists to burn. Love was weakness.
Why, then, did he feel so light? His every muscle was relaxed, as though a gigantic stone had been sitting on his shoulders, and only now removed. Why was he smiling? He really shouldn't be. Sherlock fell for the simplist trick in the book. He had allowed himself to fall victim to everything he had despised. But he was in a world in which John existed. What wasnt there to be elated about?
Now that the inevitability sunk in, he became carried away by thoughts of him and John in a relationship, growing old together, loving each other, the way other human beings did. If Sherlock had made himself so vulnerable, who's to stop John from also exposing his emotions for him in return? If love was weak, they could be weak together (Is THAT what love felt like?). They could both exist together, feeding their silly indulgences in each other, sharing the universe in a wholly different light than before!
"I must tell him... I... I must tell him!", Sherlock chanted excitedly.
Springing up out of the chair, his hand came into contact with the doorknob and he froze.
John is engaged.
John and Mary are getting married.
A single tear sat in his eye, despite Sherlock's need for a little dignity. He sat back down in his chair, glaring at the missed chance he spent running around London and yelling and solving crimes and being so, oh so blind! Another tear fell, this time he didnt bother to stop it.
"I'm too late."
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lemonietrinket · 4 years
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Dreams Come True ||| Johnny x MakeupArtist!Reader
summary: johnny is kind to all the members of staff, and so you believe that he thinks no differently of you genre: fluff, tiny bit of angst but you have to squint, some more heated elements its john warning(s): slightly more inferred heated elements than i usually make, but otherwise none word count: 2189  song(s): ambience an: sorry anon for the wait! this really wasnt supposed to be long, i literally wrote it in my drabble format, and throughout it genuinely felt like it was only 1k words but... yeah. im not changing the format tho no sir. i havent the patience lmao
fem!reader
~~~
the beat of the bass bounced from wall to wall, thumping over the air at the stage and all the way through to the small room you and easily twenty others were mulling around in. a long time ago, the inability to see around the throngs of people—no matter if you knew them or not—would have unnerved you. but now, despite the way you had to curl over the counter of a vanity to make space for the other stylists, you felt at home. because even with your back to the wall, the vibrations running their unnatural fingers along your spine, the gentle smile of an even gentler giant was mere inches from your own, and it left you no option but to be enthralled by nothing but him.
he was grinning despite your repetitive comments asking him not to, as you extended the brush towards his cheeks—probably because you’d said them through small giggles of your own. it wasn’t your fault that his jokes were funny. he had the comedic timing of a god, teasing the others in such a way that it was impossible not to smile... right? he was too gorgeous to block out, but there was no way in hell you would admit that. 
“what?” he enquired teasingly, eyebrows raising beneath the fluttering fingers of the hair stylist stood behind him.
you rolled your eyes, applying more colour to your brush just so you had an excuse to avoid his gaze. you knew full well he stared at people intentionally to make them nervous. you had no idea why he did it to you though. it made you take longer with his make-up and you were already falling behind—you didn’t even have to glance at the clock to know, the fact that you were working at the same time as another stylist was enough. you prayed the smooth breeze from the window was enough to cool the blush off your face as you attempted to focus upon your work, smoothing the rouge across his skin. but it was inevitable that he would capture your attention once again, and he did so with spending barely any effort. his chin tilted upwards for you to get a better view of your canvas, leaving you able to make sure everything was blended properly, but also very nearly unable to breathe.
johnny, the only man you were practically assigned to now after you’d proven your skills during a comeback late last year, was known for caring for the staff. holding doors, giving them space, sitting down so they can reach easier because it was his responsibility that he was a damn tree. since you were practically his personal make-up artist, it was thus no surprise that you were the focus of his caring nature. however, even you were beginning to question how far his gestures went. like now—now was one of those times.
“y/n,” he began, and you immediately caught onto that tone of mischief he always had when he was about to try and catch you off guard.
you sighed, biting your lip to try and remain serious in the face of what you knew would inevitably follow. “yes, john?”
he took that as his cue. “do you mind making my lips a little more red?”
glancing away from his eyes before you could get trapped in them, you stared intently at your handiwork instead. regarding his lips, you felt your eyes narrow. they were plenty bright enough, exactly how you’d done last time. ‘you sneak,’ you thought, ‘does he just find joy out of other people’s embarrassment?’ though you had to question yourself if you were really embarrassed, as a part of you was perfectly happy to bask in the opportunity of touching his plush lips. they were so full and soft that you couldn’t help but let your thoughts wander whenever you looked at them. 
when you peered up, searching for the clock on the wall, you caught the hair stylist’s stare. she’d slowed her ministrations, and was now eyeing you blankly. only below the surface was there a glint of warning.  you quickly glanced away, only to accidentally to meet johnny face on. he’d cocked his head on one side, brow creased in that way that threw your heart in a loop. 
“pretty please?”
caught up in his handsome features you could feel the heat rising to your face once again. as much as you willed it away, deep down you knew it was no use. you cursed at yourself in your head, why do you take everything he says so seriously. there’s no way you actually mean anything more to him than just friendly coworker. 
you swallowed with a nod, letting your fingers run aimlessly through your kit while you focused primarily on thinking about something else. dwelling on the impossible would do nothing but lower your mood and you knew that. still, it didn’t mean the tiny spools of daydreams didn’t occasionally slip through. they left you dazed when you came back to the real world, as if their tiny pinpricks of imaginary light grew to the size of blinding headlights in the pitch of night. upon your return you found that your gaze had barely left him at all—as soon as your eyes trickled away, they absently fled right back to him. a circumstance that he always looked so damn happy about. dreams don’t come true, y/n.
you hadn’t registered that the hair stylist had stalked away until johnny spoke up and his words left you fumbling in the mix of your own crush and the fear that someone had overheard.
“you look so cute when you’re focused,” he’d said, grin a hair-width from a knowing smirk, eyes curved in that gentle enticement. it was as if he wanted you to fall. had you not been reeling you perhaps would have scowled. you already had fallen, you didn’t need him to turn up the anti any more than he head—otherwise there would come a stutter that your heart didn’t recover from.   
“sh-shut up,” you stammered, trying to hide the jump of your heartbeat behind a smile. but as his plush lips parted into a chuckle, your mind just trundled straight back to the dreamscape it always visited when you thought of them. 
truly, no one would blame you, because kissing a man like that would be one of the true wonders of the world. the flashes of a possible time, where your lips melded with his and he held you close and safe, away from the rest of the world, where no crowd could ever hurt you, were tantalising to say the least. you bravely gulped them down. 
it would not last however, as johnny was on a mission, it seemed, to make you blush as much as possible. so much for feeling calm.
when you poised your hand by his lips again, he merely insisted, “how can i? with someone like you right here... i just can’t help myself.”
you very nearly choked on those threads of dreams as well as the corniness, whilst he underlined all his words with a sweet smile. the one that made you want to cup his cheeks and feel the gravity of such a person before you. 
you shook your head, to abandon the thoughts as well as shake him off. he’s just trying to make you laugh. “bleghh, now shush,” you managed, praying he’d take your simple response as a sign to quit.
alas, your poor heart, he did not.
“what? do you not believe me?” you didn’t peer up and instead took advantage of the tiny pause to brush more scarlet around the corner of his lips. it was short-lived however, as they then opened in exaggerated surprise, and you only just managed to pull away before you accidentally painted a faded gash across his chin. “you don’t believe me!” 
“i don’t know what you’re talking about, johnny,” you uttered, hesitantly peeking over at the clock to see the minute hand way too close to the hour for your liking.
he sighed, and had you actually regarded the entirety of his expression, you would have spotted how saddened he looked. “you don’t...? ah, y/n, how could you not realise just how beautiful you are?”
“johnny...” you tapered off. you had expected to come out in more of a warning tone, but with the seconds ticking by at an alarming rate, the elation at his words combined with the nerves and irritation at how you couldn’t do your job all combined to make it sound a lot more emotionless than its nature truly was.
“with your gorgeous smile, pretty eyes, adorable laugh, impeccable fashion sense...” he paused and you could have sworn his breath hitched in his throat, “really, it’s enough to ruin even the strongest of people around here, i w—”
in a desperate attempt to get your job done, without a single thought you raised your hand to grip his chin gently between your thumb and finger. and instantly, all the words he had been suddenly desperate to ramble in that moment were stolen off his tongue, the flirty smirk stilled. 
for a few seconds you were stunned too, before the two minute call rose throughout the room like a game of chinese whispers. in a moment of sheer reflex, you attended to a minuscule patch of faded vermilion and further highlighted an extra line of shadow that in all honesty didn’t need renovation, all while your head span as you interrogated yourself and the world on as to what the hell johnny was playing at. 
“there you’re done.” 
your hand jumped away as if shocked by static, and you began to clean up your cramped workspace. you didn’t give a final look over your masterpiece, you knew the man could pull off pretty much anything thrown at, or in this case upon him. but he didn’t respond, and it was the uncharacteristic silence that brought out just enough confidence within you to turn your head towards him once again. 
you find his honey eyes wide and a small and silent gasp upon those very lips that had said all those confident, sly things. his fingers were tentatively brushing against where yours had been, as if tracing the petals of a rose.
“i-i would know,” he finished out of the blue, expression still in his stupor.
“sorry?”
johnny’s pout was truly something to behold, and it was now different now. as the light in his eyes softened, he murmured just loud enough to be heard only by you over the chatter of staff and bandmates alike, “weren’t you listening?”
tracing backwards through the amalgamation of chaos that had been the past five minutes felt like it would take hours. somehow though, as in the peculiar nature of all thoughts and memories, you managed to trace back just far enough, for enough to fall into place piece by piece. and as soon as a part of the jigsaw was revealed, the wider picture came into focus. despite your own sheer disbelief.
“i... ruined you?” 
he laughed sheepishly then, hand finally moving from his jaw to the back of his neck, the consideration of not ruining his hair style clearly skipping his mind. “well... in all the best terms of the word, yeah.”
silence filled the space between you, leaving the ruckus beyond to only grow and seep into your ears, like the cold of autumn through a forgotten window when the music stopped playing. instinct drew you forward then, as if it were pulling upon strings of fate. your hand twitched in your lap, ready to lift and hold him again, and it was as if both of you forgot where you were—johnny moved forwards in his seat much like you did. 
but then came the frantic yell from the doorway. “johnny, what are you doing?! you’re on stage in literally thirty seconds—!”
the man swept to his feet, making sure to draw his face as close to your ear as he could get away with under the suspicious eyes of the staff surrounding you. you would argue that there was no way that could ever be construed as meaningless, but in the moment there was no way you could care. 
“you’ll help me get this all off, right? after?” he asked, before he leant back. 
you had offered him nothing but a smile, but he knew the gleam in your eyes. it was one of intrigue, one of excitement. with a final glance down to your lips, your crush strode off and out of the room, leaving you with a dozen pairs of eyes all focused intently on you and the bright grin on your face. 
you cleared your throat, covering your mouth with the back of your hand as you nodded an apology to them, you hadn’t meant to make him late after all. but nothing could quell the joy that pulsed through your veins, and so you excused yourself for a small break outside to gather your breath in the cool night air. 
maybe dreams do come true after all. 
~~~
an: i dont like this. not one bit. i really struggled to write it bc creativity hates me so im really sorry :((  i hope ill edit it soon, for the benefit of everyone :/
also... im aware that the ambience isnt specific to the scenario right here, but—as much as i love the idea of the videos og scenario—this is the closest thing i could find to what i was after :(( please imagine more chatter with it 
also can you tell i know nothing about makeup? ha
Masterlist
~~~
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sylv-atica · 4 years
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My Thoughts on Tsumugu Logic
So hey this is totally a spoiler so get away if you dont want to be spoiled.
Tsumugu Logic totally played me as they lock the murder mystery part aka the chapter 9 and so on. I was completely fooled up till i realized i havent see the whole "Tsumugu drowning" at the very beginning of the story. Though the surprise was nice, the story didnt feel as compelling as Tasokare Hotel for me, the pacing felt strange i guess... like all of the sudden the genre changed and stuff get dumped at the last few portion of the game... but it was intended by the author as they want to write something "different" from their usual work. Less fantasy, gruesome morbid stuff yada yada yada....
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Characters wise, i really like Tsumugu and Sosei. Tsumugu is energetic, high-tension, hyper kinda guy. He's a ball of energy and he's plenty cute as he beamed from time to time but he has strong character and very true to his conviction. His choice not to forgive the murderer even though he had loved her for a long time. He could assess the situations and keep a cool head if needed to. Tbh he's a cool dude.
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On the other hand, Sosei is the capable (except for housekeeping) smart, cool as cucumber dude and was written with the concept of "someone who can laugh at Oosoto and Neko narcissism regarding destiny". He's snarky and I really love his pouty sprites hahahaha. I love how the game explore Sosei and Koyo relationship and I really enjoyed chapter 8. Wish he had more screentime tbh.
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Then onwards to our main villain: Kotoko. I did dread that Kotoko might be the killer when "climbing the railing" stuff was shown in the investigation of the 2nd murder. I didnt really like her as i thought she was iffy right from the start, but especially moreso when she was involved with Mirae (chap 6). Her advice, for me, didnt sound so nice as if she was disregarding Miraes effort... so i was just irked so bad at that point...
Never really been suspicious of her before that certain point in the investigation, but i didnt expect her to be a uhh psycho??? But hey... you know when Tsumugu pushed her head down and scared her by pretending to stab her with a knife, hahaha.... i felt elated... i know its strange, but it was satisfying to see after all the shitshow...
Her motive was understandable but i guess she irked me too much to earn my sympathy.... I do like Yu, tbh i really like him even though his screen time is almost nonexistent and we only knew Yu from the chat section (which was not him but Kotoko all along). He's a cutie sure but he also a nice friend that tsumugu made in highschool... I was ridiculously surprised when it was revealed that he died, much like Tsumugu.
I think that there are more story about the highchool day on the special stories but i dont think ill ever buy it... its not as expensive as the Tasokare Hotel one but it would still strike a blow on my wallet... I wanna see Tsumugu and Yu highschool day, and i wanna see Sosei and Koyo too :((
Long story short: I enjoyed this game and it surprised me from time to time. Tsumugu Logic just like any ESC-APE game has memorable and interesting characters. The story didnt felt as episodic as Tasokare Hotel but it felt less integrated for me as the whole murder and black club stuff was randomly thrown towards the end ot the game without any prior foreshadowing (which was completely intended by the author)... Probably because I played Tasokare Hotel first that i cant help but liking it better but Tsumugu Logic still worth the try for an escape game or visual novel fans.
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july-19th-club · 4 years
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my gender thing si like. my gender thing is like. okay im thinking about this and its like.................i dont really/can’t really socially transition because i would have to move away from every one and every thing i know to do it successfully (not because some people wouldnt accept it because SOME would . not my family but some other people maybe) but because i can’t handle the stress and anxiety that would come with making a major life change that could be dangerous like that. im just not. i just couldn’t. it would be just meltdown after meltdown i couldn’t do it. so i can’t socially do it and i can’t medically either because a) can’t afford it b) don’t like gross body stuff & try to think about it as little as possible c) medical anything even normal medical stuff is such a hassle it ALSO gives me anxiety basically i am too anxious to ever transition because i would have a heart attack or something idk............................ii am . like what if i am literally just some guy i have been asking myself that question for the past YEAR or more and havent brought it up even on here which is pretty much the only location where it wouldn’t rock a boat ive spent years keeping steady. because if i’m not ready i dont want to. get anything started. and im NOT in a place in my life where i can be ready in any location but an online community where the stakes are very low. i do everything slowly. i always have i can’t go too fast or i shut down. but what if im not a woman EVER. what if ive never been one because i really never felt like one i just felt like it was this thing i just sort of DID. not WAS. and i don’t MIND being one really it’s just like playing a character and i’m pretty good at it it feels normal but it doesn’t feel. satisfying. i can’t even say it doesn’t feel NATURAL when ‘perceived womanhood’ has been my default state for twenty-six years but im even judging how im sitting on the couch right at this moment because if i want mascness so bad why don’t i always display it? in the solitary comfort of my own home can’t i just sit and lie and talk how i want and it means whatever i want it to mean? which is FINE. but it’s not because like. i gotta prove it to myself or nobody else will ever believe it you know? and even though it’s so low-stakes on here to just wop an extra name and pronouns into the ring it feels so big. and i know you can go back if you turn out to be wrong. i know that. but ive spent years feeling the most satisfaction and elation in my own experience of ‘gender’ whatever that is when i was pretending not to be a girl. or pretending not to be a woman. and i only say ‘pretending’ because they were always SPECIFIC people. because it’s easier to put on a button-up and some boots and think about like. charley parkhurst or somebody and . idk channel that than try to be Me But I’m Definitely A Man. didn’t feel real enough . so i don’t know maybe i’m not that far down the masc spectrum after all and i’m just really attached to some kind of playacting i don’t KNOW . i do know that i get very disappointed when someone i assume is a trans man turns out not to be one in a work of fiction, but that’s such a stupid litmus test. like that’s not how you figure out if you’re trans, right? this is very long god bless you if you read all of it idek what im saying i just.........................did want to say it though.
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that-trash08 · 4 years
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Backstage - Ch.2
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Heres the link if you havent read the first one: Part 1
Title: Backstage
Type: Angst to Fluff
Pairings: Analogical, past Prinxiety, Prinxiety
TW: Swearing, heartbreak(lemme know if there's anything else I should add)
Notes: Pink is both Roman and Virgil(keep reading to find out ;3), anything that {looks like this} is a character's thoughts
Summary: He thought they were inseparable. They both couldn't stand being away from each other. Guess Virgil had different ideas. One day Virgil had a little chat with Roman and it went south. Roman didn't take the news well and avoided Virgil for a while. As Roman was breaking, Virgil found light at the end of the dark tunnel, Logan. He and Virgil got together. And they were so happy. And Roman now has to watch from the side, feeling ever so hopeless that Virgil will change his mind.
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Previously: ...As Roman was shattering, Virgil asked, "Hey lo, can I talk to you? Alone?" Logan nodded and they went into the kitchen. Virgil knew this moment wasn't right, but he couldn't hold back any longer. He was going to confess to Logan and hope for the best.
---
Virgil and Logan walked into the kitchen. Virgil sat himself up on the counter and Logan leaned against the counter next to him. "So," Logan started, "What is it you needed to tell me?" Virgil started to play with his hands as his anxiety increased a little. {Okay, you got this! You can do this, just spot it out and hope for the best...but what about Roman? God this could hurt him more...GAH, WHY ARE FELLINGS SO DIFFICULT TO DEAL WITH-} "You good there, Virgil? If it's something personal please, take all the time you need. I'll wait until you're ready to speak" Virgil was struggling to respond.
"Oh uh....yeah, sorry. I'm good...I'm just trying to get my thoughts together.." He thought about how he wanted to approach the topic, and with a heavy gulp, he spoke. "O-okay, so...I know this is sort of a wrong time but I just...I've been thinking recently and I..." the words fired in his throat. "I uh- I-I-" Logan raised a brow. {CODE RED! WHAT'RE YOU DOING MAN?! YOU'RE BLOWING IT!!! JUST SPIT IT OUT GOD DAMMIT!!} Shutting his eyes tightly, Virgil blurted out, "I LIKE YOU!" There was a moment of silence before any of them spoke.
"You...do.." Logan paused for a moment. "Do you mean it?"
"I, yeah..Yeah, of course I mean it! Why wouldn't I?" Virgil could of sworn he saw literal sparkles in Logan's eyes. A wide smile spread across Logan's face as he picked Virgil up off the counter top and spun him around. Virgil was a little surprised at first but both broke into smiles and giggles. Logan eventually put Virgil down and both were out of breath. They took a moment to regain their breath, and then Logan was the first to speak.
"I know I'm not great in the feelings department, but I feel so elated right now. I've felt the same way for quite a while now and I've never known how to say so. Especially since you were with Roman for so long-" He cut himself off. "Speaking of, aren't you two still together?"
Virgil sighed. "As of today, no... that's why if he seems off for while, that's the reason as to why. I just...I don't know. I felt like there was something missing...I felt like that thing missing was with you. I didn't want to lead him on and just hurt him more, so I did what I thought was the right thing...." Logan took a moment to process the information. "I see.. Well I understand, and if there's anything I can help you with, if gladly be there for you." He gave a soft smile. Virgil shared that same smile.
"And you say you're not good with emotions." Logan just shrugged.
"I'm better with some emotional things than others, I guess." After a fee more moments of chatting, they went back to the living room and sat next to each other.
"Ooh, what's going on here?" Patton teased, giving Logan and Virgil a knowing look. Both Logan and Virgil went to Patton for help with how they felt, and Patton did his best to give them the best advise he could. Virgil stuck his tongue out playfully while Logan just rolled his eyes. Patton gave a small giggle and congratulated them.
---
Over the span of days, to weeks, to months, Roman has been more and more down. Virgil was the love of his life. He put all his time and effort into their relationship, just fornit all to go down the drain. It killed him every time when he'd see Virgil cuddling with Logan on the couch, or when they'd hold hands under the table at dinner. He tried to deflect his pain any time someone asked him, "Are you okay?" He'd lie and say he was fine, but he wasn't. He just wasn't. He'd commonly think, {How do I erase you voice, your smile, and our memories? I loved you, I thought we were meant to be! This isn't fair, I still need you! I promise, I'll do better, just please, come back....please...} One night, it was really late, and everyone had gone to their rooms except for Logan and Virgil. They were going to have a movie night, just the two of them. Virgil was going to get a few things from his room when he heard Roman singing in his room. He decided to stand outside and listen, just to hear what he was singing.
Mercy, why you gotta show up, looking so good just to hurt me? Why you wanna stop this whole damn world from turning?
Mercy, why you hanging on so tight if this ain't working? Why you wanna stop this flame if its still burning? Cuz it's still burning...
So if you're gonna break my heart, just break it. And if you're gonna shot, then take it, take it! And if you've made up you're mind, then make it, make this fast...
If you ever loved me.... he paused and shakely sung the part. Have mercy...
Virgil put a hand over his mouth as tears sprung to his eyes. He heard Roman pick up again and kept listening.
If you go out tonight and get drunk and lonely...
Wind up home alone, please don't call me, and say you miss me...no...
Virgil quietly sung along to the next part as he heard Roman let loose. Roman didn't care for who heard him. He was hurting, and he needed to let it out.
If you're gonna break my heart, just break it! And if you're gonna take you're shot, then take it, take it! And if you've made up you're mind, then make it, make this fast...
If you ever loved me.... Have mercy!
As Roman continues to sing, Virgil can hear the shakiness in his voice. It's so painful to hear him like this... he thought. Roman started to whisper sing the next part:
If you're gonna break my heart, just break it... If you're gonna take your shot, take it...Take it,
Woah, if you're gonna break my heart, just break it. And if you're gnna take your shot, then take it, take it! And if you've made up your mind, then make it, make this fast...
If you ever loved me...mmm...
Roman paused, taking a break to collect himself. He was in so much hurt and pain he didn't know how to describe it.
If you ever loved me...have mercy...
Oh, have mercy...oh,have mercy...
Roman refused to sing the last line, so very quietly, Virgil finished it for him.
...Have mercy...
Virgil quickly and quietly went to his room to grab the needed materials and went downstairs to Logan. He put everything down on the floor and curled up next to Logan, starting to cry into his chest. "Stardust, what's wrong? What happened?" Virgil just shook his head and mumbled, "later..." Logan wrapped his arms around Virgil protectively, not wanting to ever let go. Logan quickly got up and got the blankets and remote, turning on the movie and making a protective cocoon around Virgil, holding him in his arms. They both fell asleep there, cuddled together.
---
In the middle of the night, Roman grew hungry and needed something, anything. He sighed and went downstairs, making sure to be quiet on the stairs to not wake anyone. To no surprise, he saw Virgil cuddled up to Logan on the couch. He made made his way to the kitchen and grabbed a jar of crofters. Was it their last jar? Yes, but he'd go out and get more in the morning. Or afternoon, whichever time he felt like going at. He grabbed a spoon as well and went upstairs. At the same moment, Virgil slowly woke up and got a glimpse at Roman. His gut twisted in all kinds of ways and he clung to Logan a little tighter.
In the Morning
Virgil woke up at morning and stretched and yawned. He went to say good morning to Logan but was met with the smell of breakfast. He followed his nose to the kitchen, where he saw Logan making breakfast. Virgil noticed there was some sort of secret hidden in his eyes, he just couldn't tell what it was. "Good morning, Stardust! I made you your favorite, pancakes with strawberries on the side." Logan gave a little smile and handed Virgil his plate. Virgil tried to give Logan a kiss on the cheek to thank him, but he shied away from it. Virgil didn't understand. He'd done it so many other times, why was this time different?
"Thank you, my moon shine. I appreciate this."Logan nodded and pulled out a seat for Virgil. Virgil sat down and Logan scooted his chair in. After Virgil was situated, he tool his seat at the table. Breakfast was quieter than usual. After eating, Virgil broke the silence.
"Logan, is there something wrong? You've been acting weird the whole morning..?
"How so?" Logan shot back.
"It's just...you seem conflicted about something. I sense there's something you need to say, but you don't know how to say it."
Logan looked confused. "It's nothing like that at all stardust. I was just thinking about last night. You came downstairs with tears in your eyes, ready to bust at any second. When I tried asking what was wrong, you just pushed the question away and held on a little tighter. I sensed it when Roman came down the stairs, cause you held on to me tighter. So what did he do to make you so upset?" Logan asked. {Shit, he's really worried, isn't he?} Virgil thought. He took a deep breath and explained everything. How he heard Roman singing, an only wanted to stick around to hear what song it was, but ended up staying until the very end. He mentioned how hurt Roman sounded, how he was barely able to keep himself together singing. As he ranted, he let his heart take over and accidentally admitted he missed Roman, and how even though he found the piece he was looking for, every other piece felt missing. Logan listened to it all and processed. Logan took in a small breath and started to speak. He couldn't believe what he was about to say.
---
Over the past couple of weeks, Logan started to notice the longing look whenever Virgil saw Roman. How apologetic he looked. How if Roman were to ask him to come back, he'd gently put him down and go back to Roman. Logan's been thinking about this for a while, and he thinks this is the right thing to do for the both of them.
---
"Look V, this has been in my mind for a while now, and I think it's time we part ways.. I don't want to hold you back and keep you waiting when there's someone who needs you right now. And don't worry about me, alright? I'm being completely honest when I say this, I'll be alright." He blushes a little bit and rubs the back of his neck with one hand. "I knew this might have happened within these past few weeks, and there's someone in mind I think I've, how do you say it? 'I think I've fallen for?'" Both of them giggled a little bit.
"You're sure you want to do this Lo?" Virgil asked. Logan reached out for Virgil's hand.
"Yeah, I'm sure." They both smiled and stood up, both giving each other a hug. After a bit they both let go. "Alright, go talk to him.. he needs you." Virgil gave him a gentle smile and quickly make his way to the stairs. He dashed up the stairs and made his way to Roman's room. He brought his hand up to the door, hesitating to knock. His hand hovered in the same position for a few minutes. {C'mon Virge, just knock! He'll..he'll answer the door, and you and Roman can talk things out and it'll be fine..yeah, everything will be fine..} he thought. He tried a few times to knock, but kept hesitating. {But wait, what if he won't listen to you? What if he hates you and doesn't even want to talk to you? What if he won't even give you the time of day to explain yourself and shuts you out and never speaks to you again and everything goes into a downward spiral and everyone will hate you for what you did?! } Virgil started to panic, his thoughts getting worse by the second. Before he could even second guess himself, he knocked on the door and waited for a response. He heard shuffling from the other side of the door and was surprised Roman actually opened the door.
Roman was surprised to see Virgil at his door. "Virgil..?" Roman asked. Before Roman could say anything more, Virgil spoke up.
"Roman, listen. I am so, so, so so sorry for everything. I didn't want to tell you at the time cause I was struggling to tell you how I felt on the day of the breakup, but I felt like there was a singular piece missing to my puzzle. I thought that maybe it was with Logan and at the time, it was. But then I realized that once I found the missing piece, it's like someone knocked the puzzle off the table and all the pieces went everywhere, loosing most of the pieces. I tried for awhile to hide it and be happy with Logan, but I just...I saw the way you'd look at us. I saw hurt and jelousy in your gaze. I get if you want to be mad at be right now, or you don't want to talk for a while, but Roman," Virgil paused. "Please promise once the cloid in yoyr heas is gone, you'll come back to me. I promise I won't leave again..I'll stay till the end of time..just please, come back to me..." Both of them stood in silence. Roman was shocked for what came out of Virgil's mouth. But that feeling quickly became happiness and he met Virgil's lips with his own. He wrapped his arms around the others waist. Virgil was surprised at first, but melted into it and wrapped his arms around the back of Roman's neck. They soon pulled away and Roman held on to Virgil tightly, never wanting to let go. In that moment, it was just the two of them. It felt right in that moment. So right. So perfect.
---
As the weeks went by, Roman's mood began to increase. At first, Virgil gave Roman his space, letting Roman get adjusted to the new fact that they were together again and he was no longer "backstage." At night, there were times where Roman woke up to not having Virgil there, and would sometimes forget that their relationship was once more. But he'd quickly remember and text Virgil. After a while though, the two grew closer again, and everything was back to almost normal. The next years for them were going to be amazing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Oh. My. God. After 20 million eons, it is finally here! I had so much fun writing this, but like I mentioned a few posts back, there was a lot of family shit getting in the way and it made me feel less motivated to do anything. I actually had this all written before and there were going to be other parts, but my dumb self accidently deleted it and so I had to restart. Then more family shit started to pop off and....yeah. Honestly, this came out way better than what I orginaly had. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed backstage! If there are any prompts or anything you'd like me or write let me know! I'd be glad to make them, I have a lot of fun writing this stuff. Alrighty, be safe guys, live you all so much!!❤
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madisonrooney · 5 years
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oof is it...sappy that im getting Emotional over graduation
like it hasnt felt real until like...now bc im not even sure when im gonna be done with my finals cuz i have to wait and see if my prof has notes on my script. i very well might not even be done until AFTER graduation (and believe me im livid about that)
but still like we have a school wide celebration tomorrow so its really Hitting and like part of me has been telling myself “you dont need to be proud of yourself and neither does anyone else, you finished school its not that hard” but like...school itself has only been so hard (overall, at least. some parts have def been very hard). but like...ive been having to deal with my mental health struggles and shit on top of it. i was only so stable at the end of high school but i managed to move out, live entirely by myself, and take care of myself with varying degrees of success. sure my sleeping and eating schedules havent been perfect but hey im here and im healthy relatively speaking. i also left the only home id ever known and entered somewhere where i hardly knew anyone (not that i had many friends in my hometown) and like i honestly fucking flourished. ive made SO many friends and my social skills have improved immensely. thats partially cuz there are like...better people here but still. i feel like my career has kind of plateaued bc ive been rethinking it but everything else in my life has skyrocketed since i finished college (as in just like the way i live my life and all the events i go to and stuff. like i finished high school loving dove cameron from afar and i finished college with her recognizing me and being elated to see me at every event? thats a success to me).
so like yah i made it. when i was 14, i didnt even know if id live this long. ik im not the only one to say that but its true.
not to mention how the school system is like...the source of most of my mental health issues. i dont feel like getting into that now but to be free from that after more than a decade of it making me miserable? you have no idea how excited i am. honestly you could give me an awful job and id probably take it over school at this point. this is FAR more than just “meh school sucks” it has seriously ruined my life in so many ways and its always felt like it would never end (and the fact that my final is technically due after graduation is kind of prolonging it but still. even if idk when thats ending it WILL end and soon).
so yah. yay me.
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iamsonyeondone · 6 years
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heir!svt // boo seungkwan
♥ fluffy!
♥ 3k words
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this cutie full of sass and just overflowing love is the heir to his mother’s infamous jeju tangerine company
yeah people might think, oh thats nothing
but hoo boi they’re the no. 1 selling jeju tangerines in korea
because they’re so sweet just like the boo family :O
and sometimes they even import their goods worldwide, ITS THAT GOOD
back to our boo
he may seem pretty eccentric, especially when he’s around seokmin or soonyoung, but he’s also a sweetheart who takes care of his juniors and friends
like he will always remind them of their worth and sometimes get really clingy
but of course his sassy side is one of the many reasons that people love him too!!
they find it funny whenever he goes on a savage strike and literally drag anYone
like he doesnt care who your parents are, he will drag you down to hell
but everyone knows he doesnt mean it half the time, but when he actually does, it will bring shivers down your spine
since his well-loved among the students, he’s literally friends with everyone
especially the younger ones because he like to feel like an older brother and feels proud when his juniors look up to him
this is so soft fk
but he also has his moments where he wants to be taken care of too so he simply just joins his closest group of friends aka the big bunch of thirteen boys
people wonder how the heck they seem so close when all of them could form a class
anyWays, onto you
so theres two groups of people when it comes to seungkwan
1) you’re friends with him or 2) youre not
lucky you, you drop in the first category because if you dont, you’re just a sad outcast who doesnt like the cutest squishy boy
but even if you were friends with him, you werent as close to the extent where you guys hang out often
its the little greetings you guys say to each other in the hallways that keeps this acquaintance going
and its not like youre scared of him or anything
in fact its a little bit more than that
you’ve always admired him for being such a positive light in Pledis High along with his friends
and he’s someone that you aspire to be like - to be fearless and firm in yourself as well as be a pillar of strength for everyone else around
but you’re just that shy student who stammers during presentations because being in the center of attention scares the living heck out of you
he’s practically your aspiration
and its pretty difficult to get close to someone who has 46389392 other people to choose from to hang out with
but thats just you overthinking it because seungkwan has been wondering if he should just ask you to join him for lunch
on the other hand, seungkwan sees you as someone who works diligently behind the scenes
yeah sure you might not be able to lead people in a group project or voice out your opinions
but you do research like a mad scientist and quietly lead the group to an A for a project by leaving notes for improvement in their files
hell yeah he sees you, he sees potential in everyone
but its also because he thinks you’re pretty cute when you get so into the textbook that you’re literally inches away from kissing the pages
but he threatened vernon not to tell you that because he cant just mAke A MoVe
he wants to get to know you more first, about your favourite colour or what you think about when you daydream in class or how your brain manages to store so much information about general facts
most of the random facts you remember is from snapple bottles but no one needs to know that
so yeah maybe boo seungkwan is a little bit Whipped™ for you h a h a a little bit???
like every other day when seungkwan passes by your class, he sees you in your seat scribbling on your notes with furrowed eyebrows and your bottom lip between your teeth
and you just tugged on his heartstrings because how can someone look this good while doing something so,,, normal
and vernon has to snap him out of it
“dUde you’re really not making this crush thing any less subtle,”
and seungkwan nearly wants to hold him in a chokehold and make him regret his words
but when he takes another glance at you, you’re staring back and he’s quickly covering up his slightly blushed cheeks with a little wave
while you shot a shy smile towards him and waved back
and that simple action of yours just saved vernon from being suffocated
which also makes seungkwan say fuck it and ask you to join him for lunch or a study session after school that day
he wasn’t able to catch you at lunch that day, probably because you felt more comfortable in the quiet and cool library of the school
so when he sees you preparing your things to leave the school, he jogs right after you and nearly slams himself into your locker door
“hi! yn right?” he asks you, as if he’s never repeated your name in his mind every time he sees you
“y-yeah, what’s up?” you inquired back, zipping up your backpack and closing the locker door shut
“i was thinking, if you had the time, if you could join me on a study session today,”
and as much as you want to confirm his words, the way he looks at you with the hopeful sparkle in his eyes confirmed itself
boo seungkwan was asking you to hang out, and he chose you out of everyone else
“oh,, im free but i have a curfew so i hope you dont mind if we dont stay out too long,” you mustered every ounce of courage you had as you slung your bag over your shoulder
“great!! i know just the right place for us to study at,” he smiles, taking the spot next to you as he guide the both of you out of school
throughout the walk to the study spot seungkwan had planned, he had been talking about the stories about his friends and the way they have been annoyingly him lately - but of course they did it out of affection
“they say i pout alot when i get angry but i dont pout that much >:((” 
and as he whined about the statement, his lips indeed formed into a big sad pout just as his friends had said
as you tried to hold back the giggle, that is until he brows began going up and down in frustration like a rollercoaster
and that was the trigger 
you burst out laughing, covering your mouth even though it was too late to cover up
while he looked back at you with a confused look - although his chest felt entirely different
the way your eyes turned into crescent moons when you smiled really wide as well as the way your voice sounded harmonious to him
“i’m so sorry,, it’s just that,, your friends are totally right. look at you!!” you attempted to catch your breath while you held your phone to him, the front camera had indeed showed him the pouty face his friends had mentoned
“even you too??? but its not that bad right?” seungkwan looks back at you with pitiful puppy eyes and a part of you melts at the adorable sight
“no its not bad!! its actually pretty cute,” you reassured him, still recovering from your laughing fit
cute?? did you just call boo seungkwan cute??
he’s smile starts to radiate and his cheeks turn bright red from being flustered
but you were too busy chuckling at the accidental selfie he had taken on your phone
before he could even mention the compliment, the both of you had reached the cafe, swinging the door gently as you entered first while he followed behind you
you guys grabbed a spot by the corner, it being one of the best place, as recommended by seungkwan himself
“i’ll order the drinks and you can start studying first,” he shoots you a kind smile before sliding out from his chair
“oh yeah, what would you like?” he inquired, quickly giving him your normal order before he went to the counter
the place was beyond amazing and you werent sure how you havent seen it before when the shop had been placed near the school
the calm and soothing ambient given by the soft jazz playing in the speakers and the bright light illuminating the place was not glaring either
as you began flipping through your notes and your textbooks, seungkwan arrives with a tray of your drinks as well as slice of cake on a plate
“we didn’t order cake but the owner of the shop gave it to us on the house. maybe its because i’ve become a regular,” he chuckled, rubbing the nape of his neck after he had placed the tray to the side
“really?? ah we should thank them,” you turned towards the cashier where a man with circular glasses had a smile plastered on his face
and is that a,,, thumbs up?? did he just mouthed ‘good luck’?
“i think he wished us good luck for our exams since exam season is coming up,” but when you turn back to face seungkwan, he has his hand motioning back and forth across his neck, mouthing something along the lines of “shh”
“you actually know him?” you inquired, catching his attention as he nearly cracked his neck from turning too fast
“o-oh yeah sure! i come here pretty often remember? besides, we should really start studying before its too late,” he laughed nervously, slipping back into his seat and fetching out his required materials
and hour pasts and the pain in your neck starts to grow from facing your textbook from a weird angle, making you stretch in your seat while it captures his attention
“10 minute break?” he asks with a knowing smile as you nodded a little too enthusiastically, immediately regretting your decision while you held your drink in your hands, taking a few sips every so often
“did you get a lot done? i barely got the english practice questions done,” he sighed, taking a sip from his own cup
“yeah i guess. i managed to finish my english assignment too so i can help you if you want!” 
“reALLy?? ugh you’re a life savior yn. but enough of studies for now, LETS DIG IN,” he excitedly exclaims, placing the sliced cake between the both of you and handing a dainty small fork that matched his
your eyes sparkled in delight when you tasted the light whip cream along with the soft and spongy cake, eliciting giggles from seungkwan as your shoulders danced in elation
“you’re too adorable,” seungkwan complimented you on instinct
and its only when you look at him with wide eyes that he realized his action
“a-ah am i too straightforward?? i’ll stop if its uncomfortable,” 
but that compliment had brought a shy smile to your face, tinting the edges of your ears while you shook your head
you were slightly confused then - was your heart racing because you were with someone you admired, or was it because you began to see him in a different light
in a span of a few hours, seungkwan was more than you had assumed and you really meant that he was more than just an embodiment of positivity and sassiness
you werent sure what words you would exactly use to describe him now that you knew him a little more
but it was definitely not in a way where you saw him as an aspiration any longer
and more on seeing that smile on his face
“yn? yN? are you really sure its ok?” and that cute pout is on his face once again
“y-yeAH its totally fine!! we better finish this cake quick, my curfew is in another hour,” you smiled apologetically before taking another bite
“it’s alright, we can study together again if you want to,” 
and minutes just as fast as the time the both of you had spent together
in a split second, you had arrived at your door - although with many times you had reassured him you would be able to walk home alone, seungkwan wouldnt budge an inch
“i guess i’ll see you at school tomorrow?” he questioned, a small shy smile on his face
and as the both of you waved goodbye and went your separate ways, neither of you could wipe the wide smiles on your faces
days turn into months and a year felt like it had passed in a blink of an eye
so many things had happened during that period of time
without a doubt, you had become one of his closest friends (but others think otherwise when they see you two linking pinkies in the hallways)
and as we all know, all 13 boys came as a package, so it was only a matter of time until you met all 13 of them
it was a chaotic meeting, having to meet all of them at once made remembering names wayy more difficult
but after a while of getting to know them, you had grown accustomed to their personalities
like that one time that the noticeboard fell off the wall for some reason and you immediately thought of mingyu
you turn around and mingyu is standing right beside that noticeboard, with his entire body frozen into place
or like that one time seungkwan was telling about a prank that happened to him and asked if jeonghan was in charge of it and he just goes yEAH AND I GOT MY HAIR DYED BLUE FOR AN ENTIRE WEEK
and seungkwan was relieved that his friends had accepted you as a person
because they can get pretty protective of each other #squadgoAls 
but also because he wouldnt know what to do if they didnt like you when his crush on you is mAssive
it has grown to the point where he’s so close to confessing, but he never knows the right time to do so
on the other hand, you had begun to see him more than just a friend
the way he looked so worried when you had a little papercut on your finger
or when he stopped the other boys from teasing you because he feels this weird sense of anger boiling in the pit of his stomach
its called jealousy but boy has a little bit of a problem seeing it as it is
and anytime seungkwan initiates skinship with you, you feel your body heat up but its not to the point where you feel its overwhelming??
its more like this comfortable warmth that you can never get enough of
the kind of feeling you dont get with anyone else
and that was the moment you had finally accepted the fact that it had grown into a full-fledged Crush
either of you is still oblivious to each others feelings but its wayy to obvious to everyone else that theres something else brewing than ‘just friends’
but your thoughts and doubts get the best of you
because what if seungkwan is just this nice to everyone else?? i mean he did help out most of his juniors with their homework
and its normal seeing him hold hands and hug his other friends
and it kind of has your hopes lowered but it didnt hurt having a harmless crush right??
they come and go anyway
but seungkwan’s crush on you hasnt gone ever since his heart raced at the sight of you with the widest smiles
and he wasn’t planning to ignore it either
as per normal, the both of you walked into the cafe the both of you now frequented together, ordering the same drink but a different kind of cake to try every week
its come to the point where you guys have nearly tried every pastry there was in the cafe
but this time, seungkwan doesnt take out his notes or his pencil case with the matching tangerine keychain which you had gotten for him as a gift while your similar keychain hung on your bag
“what’s wrong?? no assignments this week?” you questioned, debating if you should finish yours alone
“well,,, not quite actually. but i felt like we needed a little break from studying since exams are over,” his eyes remain glued to the cup of iced americano in front of him 
which was weird since he would usually shoot you that warm smile you’ve grown to love so much
“is there anything wrong?” you had held onto his arm instinctively, thinking that maybe he just needed a little push to tell you whats on his mind
“i dont want to scare you or anything, so you dont need to answer back if you dont want to,” he rubbed the nape of his neck, playing nervously with the end of his hair
you nod along for him to continue, letting your hand linger on his while his eyes glanced towards the skin contact
“do you,, see me as anything more than a friend- you really dont have to answer it if it makes you feel-”
“yeah, is there something wrong with it?” you answered with a tiny bit of confidence
meanwhile your feet was bouncing under the table and your cheeks had already turned as bright as the red velvet cupcake between the both of you
and you answer shuts him up quickly
and it had been the first time he had looked back into your eyes ever since the both of you had stepped into the cafe
and they still look as sparkling as ever, if not, even more than you have ever seen them
his lips slowly curled into a bashful grin, accompanying his flushed red cheeks
“then i guess its appropriate to ask if,, if you’d be my,,,lover?” the term rolling off his tongue sends shivers down his spine
but when you bring his hand towards your lips, placing a quick peck, he nearly explodes and shortcircuits
“how could i ever say no?”
a/n: im so soft for seungkwan??? like i would squish his cheeks all day if i could o k also as per usual i’ll proofread this tomorrow morning because i can never get as inspired when it isnt 3 in the morning oops
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chanjisung · 6 years
Text
friends to lovers ➼ woojin
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» ❝ say it again. ❞
chan • woojin • minho • changbin • hyunjin • jisung • felix • seungmin • jeongin
i havent even started yet but im alr soft ; ~ ;
hnnnNNg okay
this cute bear right here
is the sweetest person eveR
will literally do anything to keep a smile on your face
sad bc of a test? d’aaaw dw 
woojin gives the beST hugs
ow my heart is soft
anyway
as everyone knows
he likes you
lmao legit everybody knows
your friend, your schoolmates, your parents, your teachers, the floor, the lockers, the ceiling, everyO N E
except for you
im so predictable and cliche bye
and he’s fine w it bc?? duh??
but if you would ever know
its cool as long as it doesn’t scare you away
plus he isnt really trying to hide it in the first place
you’re just THAT dense
kinda
ish
anyWaY
you both have a platonic relationship
yes
thinking abt woojins cuddles makes my uwuS
hugging here hugging there
kisses you on your temple too!!
“you did well today. now buy me ice cream since you’re so aMaZiNg”
and did i mention the your mom loves woojin
so much
more than you
bc i can imagine my mom loving him more than me smh
and your mom also knows that he likes you?
but thats not a shocker bc ur mom seems to know everything smH
yeah so
one guy likes you
i mean another guy
and in your opinion...
he’s a creep
but like,,just bc he keeps on asking too many questions
he’s actually a good guy but he just cant understand the meaNing of personal space
like legit he’ll text you every timE
“yo, where are you”
or like
“whatchu doin, wanna play a q&a game”
over text
wtf
ur all like, “dude, u aint my bro more less my boyfriend so can you kindly fuck off???”
but u dont actually say it bc ur too kind
bless Your Soul amen
and so one day 
you were walking out of class to meet woojin so you can both walk home already,
the creepy dude suddenly appears at your side
“hm, so y/n, any plans after school?”
out of instinct bc ur oh so honest you said “no not really”
you face palmed mentally bc wow self uR sO quiCk wiTteD
in short you regretted saying no
bc he said “cool! let’s go out for some boba then”
then he proceeded to drag you out by your hand 
and you’re like wtf
dude i did not approve of this proposition yet
so when you reached the lockers where woojin was supposed to meet you
hE wAsNt tHeRe
you mentally cursed him
he was your only chancE
oh woojin has failed you, his beloved best friend
“y/n did you know that this boba place is the beSt-”
you zoned him out bc you didnt really care what he said
all you ever wanted was to go home and play video games with woojin
or just listen to him sing
or just hug him to death
and this creep drags you into this
:((((
you sighed
oh well, atleast you’re getting free boba
you can see that you both were nearing the place
and as you were accepting your fate
someone suddenly grabs your other arm
“y/n! i’ve been looking for you everywhere!”
you turned and see kim freaking woojin there with a smiLe on his cute fes alsjdhn
“woojin!” you legit screamed bc finally! your hero!
the creep gaped at you and woojin
lmfao whatta sight
“umm? we’re on a date excuse me?”
you wanted to laugh and slap him at the same time
bC dUdE wTf A dAtE?
woojinnie here, bless him, flung an arm around your shoulders
he’s still smiling uwu
you’re melting but shh he doesnt need to know
but you could feel him getting agitated
“date? oh, babe i didn’t know you had a study date with him!”
your eyeballs almost popped off your sockets bc 
babe????!!??!
woah woah woah calm down kim woojin calm down
atleast you hope he’s calm bc you’re most certainly not
“o-oh? yeah study date bc his mind can’t process the fact that i have a boyfriend”
there 
you finally said it
and i felT greAt
the creep’s face was red hah!
but as much as you felt great
yo hort was not calm
you looked at woojin but he seemed
~calm~
eeeeEeEEnnnNgG
he wasn’t calm his heart was ready to be free
but yes going back 
the creep’s face is reD
“pfft, fine. your loss, not mine”
then he walked away
yAy bye you lil creep
anyway you and woojin laughed
bc wow yOuR lOsS noT miNe
siGh
after you both calmed down
the words babe and boyfriend came rushing back
cue the creek creek sound bc for the first time since forever 
there was an awkward silence between the two of you
“so, y/n-”
you cant stand the awkwardness so you cut him off “where were you, you loser. you could’ve rescued me from despair if you were by the lockers earlier!”
“well im sorrY, chan borrowed my notes bc he fell asleep in class. again”
“you could’ve just let him endure the pain hmp”
“well i doesnt matter know does it, i saw you go out of the campus earlier so i followed you!”
you looked at him with a pout and you felt your cheeks heat up
bc !!! the boyfriend part !!!
you sighed and decided to tell him the truth
“woojin i like you” you mumbled, barely coherent
but ofC he heard you
he alr had a big smile on his face but still said “say it again, i didn’t hear you”
you glared at him bc you know that he heard it jUst fiNe
“kim woojin, i swear-”
he laughed and kissed you’re forehead 
he placed his arm aroud your shoulders again pulling you close to his side
“im just joking, i like you too”
and ofc you were elAtEd and kissed his cheek
“now why don’t we have a date, since im your boyfriend” he smiled at you
damn i cant unsee his smile my uwus are spilled
your heart went nyooOom 
and you pulled him towards the boba place
“well good. your girlfriend is craving boba”
you both had biG smiles on your faces for the rest of the day
and you could hear all the “FINALLY”s at your school the next day when you went in holding hands
and thats it adios
STOP SLEEPING ON WOOJIN YOU COWARDS
a/n: halloooooo. my loyalty is now shaking bc kim woojin is existiNG. he’s just so cute can i cry? asjbfnckj. anyway here’s woojin’s part of the series! hope you all enjoyed it~
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