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#i hope this helps and i wish the best for you <33
fagtainsparklez · 2 years
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I'm honestly kinda scared to start watching mianite cause associative memories with a bad person but I do really want to get into it so any advice?
i’m not the best at this but here’s what i got!! if anyone has anything to add, feel free!
take your time. don’t force yourself into more than you can handle, and there’s absolutely no shame in taking breaks or stopping for as long as you need to to recuperate.
you don’t have to watch everything! in season 1 especially, shorter episodes can be skipped and the story will basically remain the same. important lore tends to go on in the longer episodes, with the shorter ones being either extremely lore-light or having none at all, and just consisting of the ccs goofing off
even then, you don’t even have to watch everything, either. i know people that only ever watched season 1, or people that only watched season 2, or dropped off somewhere along the line. all are valid experiences! don’t push yourself to more than you’re comfortable with, and if that comfort level only happens to be a certain season/part, that’s completely okay!
i’m not sure if this would help necessarily, but if it’s any easier, there’s also recaps [link] on individual days/episodes, as well as the main story in general.
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koolades-world · 5 months
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Hey! I love your work. Can you do the demon brothers with an mc that goes quiet when they're talked over? Also, I hope exams went well!
hi!! thank you for the wait! also, thank you for the well wishes! I did pretty good :3
I will absolutely write this for you! enjoy!!
Mc that goes quiet when talked over
Lucifer
he's very quick to notice you've gone silent, considering he's always paying attention to you
will silence who ever spoke over you, on purpose or not, and make sure you continue what you were saying
if you look dejected or upset in any way, they will have to apologize to you, especially if it was one of his brothers
after all, everything you say is precious to him <33
Mammon
gonna be honest, it might have been him that spoke over you...
not on purpose of course, even if it's just a one on one conversation
once he realizes, he pauses mid sentence and asks you to repeat what you said
he shyly apologizes and carefully listens to you until it inevitably happens again
Levi
not one to say anything in the moment but will feel guilty about not doing anything
if you don't manage to get out what you were trying to say during that conversation, he tries his best to remember to ask about what you wanted to say later because he knows what that feels like
if you do, he will apologize later for not helping you out
either way, it ends in kisses and a levi puddle
Satan
ever the gentleman, he looks at you first to see how you're feeling, and if you want to continue
if you do, he'll make room for you in the conversation
if you don't, he will find a way to bring up the topic again so you can continue what you wanted to say naturally
and if you're near each other, he'll hold your hand to show you he cares
Asmo
def the "they asked for no pickles" type man
WILL interrupt the interrupter to ensure you get your words in while being semi polite and semi passive agressive
also will make the interrupter listen carefully to what you said
and if they don't! he's kicking them out of the conversation because he won't tolerate that kind of behavior
Beel
he's the mvp who turns to you and asks you to continue what you were saying despite the main conversation
he keeps his full attention on you and tries to engage to show he's listening
if it's pertinent to the main conversation, he waits for an opening to announce that you have something to say
he makes sure everyone listens to you like the sweetheart he is
Belphie
he's another one that will so interrupt the interrupter but in a much less friendly cute way than Asmo
he will straight tell them to shut up
his brothers will usually be huffy but comply, but if it's not one of them, he will make them listen
anyone who doesn't listen will be seeing him later in their nightmares
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pinchofhoney · 8 months
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broken promises, part three
« part one | part two | part three (the last one)
coriolanus snow x fem!reader
word count: 3.4k
warning: angst, we used to be close but people can go from people you know to people you don't, mention of helping in the rebellion
summary: In Snow's world, only one thing mattered more than his family's reputation—you. But that was before he met Lucy Gray.
a/n: so,, this is the end of this little story of a heartbreak. thank you for sticking with it<33 for more coriolanus content, feel free to drop by my inbox where you can leave your ideas for the next oneshots!!
pages that may interest you: masterlist ♡ taglist ♡ who i write for
taglist: @metalarmsandmanbuns @mavkaorlova @strangegril002 @thathoefromcollage
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gif is not mine, credit to the owner
You'd be lying if you pretended not to be invested in the 10th Hunger Games. With Academy students participating this year, you had no choice but to follow the competition's every twist and turn, but even if it had been different, you'd have still tuned in from your home's television screen.
Despite the heated exchanges and angry words directed at Coriolanus, your best wishes were always with him. You genuinely hoped for nothing but the best for him, believing he'd achieve the deserved success he'd strived for and reach his craved scholarship, a gateway to boundless opportunities. In your heart, you rooted for Lucy Gray Baird's victory, as that seemed to be the only path leading to Coriolanus's dreams coming true.
Seeing Coriolanus each day in his perfectly fitted Academy uniform, hiding behind a facade of indifference that he never pull off around anyone outside his inner circle, playing the part of the model student, brought you pain. He gave off the impression that your past relationship had left no mark on him, leaving you in the dark about his true emotions and what was going on within his mind for the first time.
You were aware that everyone in your class had picked up on the shift between you and Coriolanus, though they tactfully avoided discussing it openly. You appreciated their silent understanding; no one was prying, and it allowed you to avoid discussing the painful change that had taken place. You didn't owe anyone an explanation, but it was easier to bear the weight of the situation when it remained unspoken. It stung to know that some girl from the District now held a more important place in your boyfriend's heart than you, someone he had known since childhood and shared the darkest moments of his life with.
The breakup with Coriolanus hit you like someone’s death. When you returned to the family penthouse, tears flowed endlessly from your eyes, and you couldn't seem to stop them. The persistent crying left you dehydrated, lying on your bed, cocooned in a blanket, your eyes red and swollen, and a pounding headache. The idea of consuming even a morsel of food felt impossible, and every inch of your room was a constant reminder of the moments you had shared with Coriolanus.
At times, you really wanted to approach him, to take the blame, to apologize for reacting hastily and to tell him that you should have let him handle things. But he treated you as if you were transparent. He had to feel your gaze on him, yet he chose to act as if you didn't exist, focusing all his attention on the Arena's broadcast screens, eagerly awaiting Lucy Gray's appearance.
As soon as the victory of the tribute from the Twelfth District became evident, you leaped to your feet, a genuine smile lighting up your face. Joining in the cheers and applause of your friends, you felt an urge to rush towards Coriolanus, but the memory of his distant gaze held you back. You knew you were no longer part of his happiness, no longer someone he wanted to share joy with.
With a lump in your throat, you discreetly cleared it, glancing around at other students. They seemed too absorbed in their own celebrations to notice your abrupt outburst. And so, you continued clapping, though the enthusiasm had waned, and the smile on your lips had dimmed.
You watched as Festus and a few other students hoisted Coriolanus onto a chair and paraded him around the podium and when they eventually placed him back on the ground, he turned his gaze toward you for the first time since your break up.
It was a brief look, lacking the joy in his eyes from seconds ago, but tinged with sense of satisfaction. It was a satisfaction born from the unexpected outcome, a result opposite to your wish for him to lose.
Afterward, all the students were directed into the dining hall to celebrate Coriolanus's victory with cake and posca.
And no longer after, the boy simply disappeared, slipping away from the festivities.
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As the final echoes of the Games' noisy cheers faded away, an unsettling silence descended upon the Capitol, and your mind was left in a whirlwind of questions and concern. The explanation provided by the Academy for Coriolanus's sudden departure to one of the districts, where he was enlisting for as a Peacekeeper, seemed like an ill-fitting puzzle piece in his life.
You knew Coriolanus better than most, his ambitions, his dreams, his unrelenting pursuit of victory. This decision, so out of character, scratched at the corners of your consciousness like an itch you couldn't quite reach. The nagging sense that something was amiss and missing from the narrative was an ever-present companion, casting a shadow over your thoughts.
But the mystery didn't end with his sudden departure. The day following the Games' conclusion, it was as if someone had meticulously wiped away any trace of the event's existence. Records, footage, and even the very name Lucy Gray Baird were methodically excised from history's pages. The thoroughness of this situation left you in a state of bewildered disbelief. The memories and echoes of the Games, once so vivid, now seemed to have been cast into a gap of forgotten time.
Your mind was a whirlwind of questions, each one clamoring for answers, but you knew that the truth was hidden beyond your reach. In all of these Capitol secrets, you had no choice but to accept the narrative spun by Doctor Gaul and Dean Highbottom, even if it left you feeling like a mere puppet, dancing to their tune.
You just clung to the belief that Coriolanus was out there, safe, and somehow untouched by the Capitol's ominous machinations. You didn't know the real reason for his leaving, but thoughts of his comfort were your only solace.
You longed to see him again, not only because of the warmth of his presence, but also because of the secrets he could hold. Yet, deep down, you knew that even if he were to find his way back to the heart of Panem, you would likely be the last person on his list to seek out.
On a day that was just like any other, as the Capitol went about its business, you found yourself outside your penthouse. It was just another moment in your everyday routine, all you wanted was to go for a walk, enjoying the last few days before university starts, unaware of things that were about to happen.
You were lost in thought, just looking around the familiar place when suddenly, someone stepped into view and your heart stopped for what seemed like a split second. It was Coriolanus, no doubt about it, but he had changed more than you could have imagined. He used to have those distinctive curls, but now, his hair was much shorter. His whole presence felt more reserved. Even the way he carried himself seemed different from what you were used to. Something about his aura had shifted, and it was not the same energy you once knew, not even the one he usually projected to others. It was a subtle change, but it was there.
Upon realizing that he was heading towards your shared building, a mix of emotions surged within you. Surprise and happiness due to the sight of the person you had missed so intensely warred with the memories of his abrupt departure, and the months of estrangement.
As he drew closer, you couldn't help but hope for a friendly reunion. You wanted to forget the past and bridge the distance that had grown between the two of you, but the Coriolanus who now stood before you was colder, more distant than ever before.
His eyes, which once held warmth and familiarity when they met yours, now seemed to pass right through you, leaving you with an unsettling sense that the Coriolanus you once knew had changed into a stranger.
“Coryo?” you cautiously greeted him as he drew closer, employing the affectionate diminutive form of his name. “I didn't expect to meet you here.”
Your friendly approach fell upon a wall of silence, an awkward pause hanging heavily between you. The air seemed thick with unresolved tension, and you questioned whether you should have simply pretended not to notice him.
“Dean Highbottom mentioned that you departed for Twelve to join the Peacekeepers,” you continued, attempting to engage him in conversation. Your gaze remained intent on his, even as his bored expression showed little sign of interest. This was undoubtedly one of the most awkward moments of your life, and the hope of a warm reunion was fading with each passing second.
You couldn't help but inquire further, “Was it because of Lucy Gray?”
Upon the mention of the tribute girl's name, a subtle shift occurred in Coriolanus's demeanor. He raised his head slightly, his gaze narrowing and his jaw clenching. The unexpected reaction baffled you, and a crease of confusion formed between your brows as you tried to comprehend his change in demeanor.
“Lucy Gray is gone,” he stated, his words dripping with coldness and arrogance, once again underscoring the transformation in his character. The warmth and compassion that had once defined your interactions now felt like distant memories, leaving you in the stark shadow of your shared past.
“Gone?” you repeated. His statement was quite confusing, and you struggled to grasp its meaning.
Without offering any clarification, he continued his stride towards the building's entrance, as if your presence had become irrelevant to him. Desperate for answers that had slipped away form you for far too long, you reached out and gently grasped the sleeve of his shirt to stop him.
“Coryo, wait,” you begged, looking into his eyes for a flicker of the person you used to know. The frigid stare he returned sent a chill through your spine, but your curiosity pushed you forward. “What happened? After... well, after you disappeared.”
His gaze dipped to where your fingers held on to his shirt, and the tension between you grew palpable. When you finally let go, his eyes met yours once more, and he spoke in a voice that held a hint of gentleness. “Do you really want to know what happened?” he asked, tilting his head to the side. He maintained his distance, standing tall and appearing to gaze down at you.
You didn't particularly like this version of Coriolanus, but at the same time you couldn't back down now; you had yearned for this moment for months.
In response to his question, you offered a simple nod, a silent invitation for him to share. The silence hung between you, heavy and full of unspoken emotions. Coriolanus glanced around, checking for any unwelcome listeners nearby, before answering.
“I've been through a living hell,” he responded curtly, leaving a trail of unresolved questions lingering in the air, but before you could voice these unspoken thoughts, he continued.
“I was forced to follow relentless orders each day, enduring the scorching sun that left burns on my skin, and the agony of taking three lives,” he recounted, as if each experience weighed equally on his conscience. “And those damn songbirds... they're a nightmare. They can drive you to the brink of insanity.”
You sought answers in his eyes, searching for any glimmer of the person you had known, but what you found was far from the warmth and compassion you remembered. It was as if something within him had been replaced by a hint of disdain.
“She betrayed me,” he continued, his voice carrying the weight of bitter disappointment, before you had time to sort out the chaos in your head. “Just when I thought I could escape it all and start a new life without constantly looking over my shoulder, she chose to abandon me.”
“What do you mean, Coryo?” you questioned, your forehead creased with worry as you gazed into his eyes.
“I killed Sejanus Plinth,” he confessed. Your lips parted in shock, and without realizing it, you instinctively moved a step away, creating a physical gap between you and someone who had once been an open book. Now, it felt as though you knew nothing about him.
You had heard rumors of Sejanus Plinth's death, but the details were murky. The nature of Coriolanus and Sejanus's relationship had always been a subject of speculation, leaving people to wonder whether they were genuine friends or just collagues. Coriolanus had occasionally expressed his frustration with Sejanus to you, but you had never imagined he would go as far as to take such a drastic step.
Coriolanus seemed oblivious to your reaction, his words continuing in a torrent of frustration. “But he deserved it. He could have listened to me and followed the rules for once. Instead, he chose to be a rebel, wanting to play the savior of the districts. That's how rebels end up,” his words were like shards of ice, driven by a wrath you had never seen in him before.
“I killed people who threatened her. I killed those who could be dangerous to Lucy Gray,” Coriolanus murmured. You gazed into his empty eyes as he continued and a sense of dread creeped over you. “And in return, she betrayed me, willing to see me suffer the same fate as Sejanus,” he said with a heavy sigh, shaking his head. “I couldn't let that happen. I couldn't risk being caught when I was mere hours away from leaving this wretched district.”
Your world seemed to crumble under the weight of his shocking confession. The inhumanity of his actions left you speechless, but Coriolanus appeared unaffected by your stunned silence.
He took a step closer, diminishing the gap between you, and you fought the urge to move back or look away from his piercing eyes.
“I'll make them all pay for it,” he declared with a small, unsettling smirk tugging at his lips. There was something in that expression that scared you, and now you were sure the boy standing in front of you was not the Coriolanus you had grown up with. “Every last one of them,” he added, presumably referring to the district residents with disdain.
With those words hanging in the air, he turned and disappeared behind the door of the apartment building, leaving you in a state of confusion and fear.
Many times, as you lay in bed at night, you often found yourself imagining the chance to see Coriolanus again. You wished that somehow, things could go back to the way they used to be, and that the warmth you once shared might return. But, the version of the man you just had a chance to look in the eyes filled you with nothing but fear now.
He seemed colder than his very name.
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64 YEARS LATER
The underground room was dimly lit, the soft glow of a single overhead bulb casting elongated shadows on the faces gathered around the table. Maps, documents, and a tactical board cluttered the space, a visual representation of the Rebellion's intricate plans. The tension in the room was palpable, and when you walked in with a woman who bore a striking resemblance to a tiger in her appearance, the rebels shared uncertain, questioning looks.
Katniss, her unmistakable braided hair and fierce gaze, was the first to break the silence. Her voice cut through the tension like a blade, “Why are you doing this?”
Her eyes bore into yours with a mix of curiosity and concern, and you felt a dozen pairs of eyes in the room fixate on you. “Risking your life to help us take down Snow?”
You inhaled a quivering breath when the memories and thoughts weighing heavily upon your chest. In your mind, a series of images flashed – a time when Snow had been had been a very different person. You paused for a moment, your thoughts returning to the Coriolanus you had once been so familiar with. The recollection painted a vivid picture of Coryo as you remembered him: his charming smile, which he had once reserved solely for you, and his distinctive, curly hair.
“I'm doing this,” you began, your voice tinged with pain and longing, “because I used to know him very well.” You deliberately used the diminutive form of his name that had once been so familiar to you, “Coryo. We were close, once.”
The room fell silent, and a myriad of emotions passed over the faces of those assembled. Your words seemed to have caught them off guard, and you could sense their curiosity and concern.
“We were in a relationship, but he's not the person I once loved anymore. This Snow, the one we're fighting against now, is a monster. He's not the Coryo I knew. He deserves the worst.”
Peeta, who sat beside Katniss, let out a sigh, and his eyes held a profound understanding. His gaze, a clear blue in the dim light, softened as he looked at you.
“Sometimes people change,” Peeta said, his voice gentle. “I've seen it happen before.”
Katniss's expression hardened with resolve, her determination unwavering. “He's going to regret everything he has done in his life,” she said.
As Katniss's words hung in the air, you felt a wave of knotty emotions churning within you. Your gaze drifted downward to the shelter's dirt floor, where the tears welled up in your eyes, threatening to overflow. For years, you had yearned for justice to be served to Coriolanus, for him to face the consequences of his oppressive rule over Panem. It had been a sincere desire, one that had simmered in your heart, yet now, with the Rebellion's cause so close to success, you found yourself grappling with a bewildering conflict.
Coriolanus had long disregarded you, deeming you unworthy of his attention and companionship. He had tear your connection, but it didn't mean that you had forgotten the feelings you had once for him.
It was his treatment of those who still loved him, the suffering of his cousin Tigris, who had been a close friend of yours, that weighed on your heart. She had selflessly helped Coriolanus throughout the war, supported him during his first mentorship and long after, but his attitude toward her changed with each passing year, and you couldn't understand why.
Over the years, Coriolanus had allowed the Hunger Games to evolve into something even more grotesque and brutal, making even bigger spectacle out of the tributes' deaths. It had been a source of disgust, a reflection of his growing cruelty. You were repulsed by the Capitol, sickened by Snow's insatiable thirst for power and the desire to see him removed from his seat of authority had been a driving force.
Yet, something within you was blocking your resolve, sowing seeds of doubt and uncertainty. The conflict within your heart was a huge storm, with one part pulling you toward the rebellion and the other tethered to a past that still held the remains of the Coriolanus you had once known, loved, and miss.
But that boy from your youth was a distant memory, swallowed by the Coriolanus who had emerged over the years, especially during his time in the Twelfth District shortly after his victory in the Games.
You raised your eyes to meet Katniss's, and in that moment, your mind drifted to Lucy Gray Baird, an ironic twist of fate that wasn't lost on you.
As Katniss observed your internal struggle, her sharp instincts sensed that there was more to your hesitancy than met the eye. She furrowed her brows, her gaze unwavering, and asked, “Is there something else you would like to share?”
Peeta, who had been observing you quietly, echoed her concern with a compassionate look in his eyes. His gentle tone conveyed understanding as he said, “You can talk to us, you know. We've all had our reasons for joining this fight.”
Your throat felt constricted, and you struggled to find your voice amidst the chaos of emotions. With a hurried swallow and a deep breath to steady yourself, you cleared your throat and shook your head. You offered a smile, though it felt forced and inadequate for the gravity of the moment, as you moved closer to the table filled with scattered papers.
“So what’s the plan?” you asked, attempting to shift the focus away from you. Your eyes darted around the faces of those gathered around the tabletop, eager to immerse yourself in the cause, to be part of the solution to the crisis at hand.
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asonorouslullaby · 7 months
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In The Shadows
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Purge Alternate Universe
Yandere - Gojo Satoru x Reader x Geto Suguru
A/N - Okayyyy I've been working on this for like a week and it's the longest I've ever written for one thing, I had a shoulder injury which is mostly healed up now during the week which hindered my progress a little because I originally really wanted this to get out nearer Halloween time, but oh well TT at least its here now right? Lmao, but I hope you guys enjoy it, I tried my best and lowkey kind of hate it, I wished I could've done more or something, but if you have any ideas around this for a possible part 2 let me knoww, although no promises ;) Consider this a massive thank you story, I now have over 100 followers and the likes and reblogs and comments, you guys, I'm crying, I love you all so much <333333 I love interacting with you guys and your comments on my stories or in my inbox <3333 you all make my day ilysm <3 :( AND IM SORRY I COULDNT HELP IT, they're kind of really mean so its more harsh yandere than the soft you all wanted :( I couldn't help myself its a purge AU TT, but I promise ill make something softer in the future <33 sorry this is so long omfg, but let me know your thoughts pretty please &lt;3 and if you actually read all of this ily
summary - Another purge night is here and you think your safe and sound, but let your guard down and you'll find yourself bound.
warnings - purge, mentions of 'off screen' murder, actual 'off screen' murder, kind of gore but reader doesn't see it, blood, rope, reader gets tied up, gags?, tape over readers mouth, they're actually kind of really mean lol, especially Geto, descriptions of panic, anxiety, overthinking, stalker situation kind of, swearing, crying, brief hair pulling, if there's any more let me know ml <3
genre - Oneshot
wc - 7.2k
~spelling and grammar fixed already~
Edit - the top photo 6/11/23
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The tip tapping of fingers on keys echoed around the silent room. The occasional footfalls of people around her walking up and down. Picking up books to further aid their studying would slip past the music playing in her ears when they were loud enough.
Every time she would hear someone being a little too loud for the library they were in she would glance up and shoot a half-hearted glare their way.
They’d never see her but it was the thought that counted. A barely audible sigh escapes her as she brings a hand up to massage her cold fingertips into the throbbing skin at her temple. 
Nervous nibbling was occupying her teeth and lips, chewing away the flesh and creating tender spots her tongue would soon soothe. 
She’d been staring at the same empty document for two hours now. No more than two sentences she was able to come up with before she’d erase them in a fit of frustration.
Abandoned textbooks lay closed behind her laptop, she’d deemed them no use around thirty minutes in, but she couldn't bring herself to get up and search for better ones. 
She was antsy, not able to focus on her assignment due in a week's time. Her brain was all fogged up, too many thoughts going through her mind and yet she's not able to focus on a single one.
The purge was tonight. March 21st. And it was currently 1pm. 
Why did she even bother to come to the library in the first place? Was she hoping to distract herself even just a little bit before she had to hunker herself down in her dorm for twelve hours? 
Maybe. Yes.
Was it working? Absolutely not.
She was too skittish. Overthinking everything that had the potential of happening later and things that have previously happened. 
‘Someone's not going to come and try to kill me just because I forgot to return their pen that one time, right?’ 
The amusing, albeit a little dark, thought did make the corner of her lips twitch just the smallest amount. 
Taking off her headphones after stopping her music, she closes down her laptop and starts to move it into her bag. 
She spares a quick glance around the few tables next to hers as she stands with the library's books in her arms. Her eyes locked with a man sitting roughly two tables down. Slumped back in his seat.
Gojo Satoru. Bright white and fluffy hair paired with a set of dazzling blue eyes. The ones currently peeking over the tops of his round shades that had slid down his nose as he tucked his head down slightly. 
Sitting in front of him and abstracting her view of Gojo only slightly is who she assumed was Geto Suguru. Two peas in a pod and never seen without the other. The long black and silky strands of hair tied up in a half up bun was a giveaway to who he was as well.
Both of them were originally from Tokyo, Japan. Coming over to America over five years ago. Or at least that's what she’s heard from around the place, not knowing them personally. They were the most popular boys in school when she had joined a little over a year ago and they still held the title strong.
She doesn’t think she's ever really interacted with them. At Least not on any kind of personal level. Sure, maybe from a few friends of friends or passing each other in the hallway and being polite to her upperclassmen, but nothing all that memorable. 
Which is why this prolonged eye contact is sending a very noticeable shiver down her spine. The smallest twitch of a smirk on his face and she was breaking eye contact, gulping down the pooled saliva in her mouth as she turned around and hastily made her way in between the towering bookshelves.
Leaving the library after stacking the books she’d previously taken back on the shelves, she hastily makes her way down the long corridors. Keeping her head down, her hands clutched tight on the strap of her bag. She passes very few people in the hallway.
Even after pushing through the doors and trekking her way to the dorms at the end of the path, there were very few people loitering around outside. Some of the people she passed looked like they could be stoned, not that she could really blame them. Some looked a little too relaxed and happy and some were just trying to get to their destination as quickly as possible. Like her.
As the doors came into view, and then the stairs, she slowly began to relax, her fast pace lessening up. Successfully getting to the safest place she could for when the purge would start. 
It was also a massive relief that her two good friends would be staying with her during the twelve hours of horror. Last time she was by herself there had been multiple scares throughout the night. Nothing too big but something she didn’t think she could handle alone again. 
Reaching her door on the third floor she fiddles with her keys for a few seconds before her door clicks open and she pushes her way inside. Closing the door and locking it again for good measure. 
It was 1:43 pm.
A few minutes after she had arrived back at her dorm did she realize she still needed to pick up some food items. Being a broke student meant she had essentially nothing in her cupboards or her fridge. And if she was ‘hosting for the purge’ this year, it meant she had to stock up at least a little bit. 
‘Imagine trying to hide from a killer and your stomach growls, I think I would just die on the spot.’ She thinks, the smallest smile gracing her face. Humour is usually her way to cope in situations like these. It’s either that or panicking and she’d rather try to save that for the main event.
With a heavy sigh and hesitation weighing her limbs down, she slowly puts her shoes and jacket back on. She can make this quick. In and out. Easy peasy. 
With a quick jump while shaking her limbs out to get rid of her last minute hesitation, she quickly opens her door and steps out before shutting it behind her. No going back now. Locking the door behind her, she starts making her way back down the stairs and out the doors, walking in the direction of the food store. 
Her nerves were still playing up though, eyes darting this way and that as if trying to find a reason for her to panic. ‘It’s okay, the purge hasn’t started yet, all those things are still illegal.’ Is what she keeps telling herself while taking a deep breath. But the fact they won’t be in a few hours was still cause for some panic. 
Arriving at the store, she wizzes around, collecting any good looking snack and throwing it in her basket before hastily paying and leaving. The heavy plastic carrier bag hanging from her fingers gave her reason to think she went a bit overboard. 
Her quickened steps and accelerated breathing were all she could hear for a while. Her walk back to her dorm was supposed to be a quiet one, less and less people were loitering around meaning less and less noises to distract her. 
Especially from the new set of footsteps that have appeared behind her.
As soon as her mind clocked the extra set of footsteps there, it went into overdrive. ‘Who is that? Are they following me? No, you're being delusional, they're just trying to get back home. But are they? They just appeared out of nowhere. Are they going to try and kidnap me? Rape me? Stuff me in a van? Drag me down a dark alleyway and murder me?’
Her mind was racing, steps quickening and breathing silenced under the new threat. ‘Oh god, what if they’re stalking me? Waiting until the purge starts to come and slaughter me? They’re going to kill me. They’re going to kill me. What should I do? What should I do? What should I do?’
And then they were gone. 
It barely registered in her mind that the fast paced footsteps from behind her had vanished. A sharp breath escaped her before her head whipped around on a desperate whim. No one. Not a soul on the path behind her. 
Her shoulders sank with relief and a watery laugh broke free from her trembling lips. ‘I’m losing my mind.’ She thought. Even though that feeling in her gut had faded, it never fully disappeared. Her racing heart never slowed and neither did her footsteps. 
Y/n hurried back to her dorm, almost running through the doors and up the stairs to fumble with her keys and quickly burst in. Double checking she locked the door behind her, and then checking every other lock on her third story apartment. Only when she had made sure they were all secure could she finally relax. 
Her body shivering and hands shaking from the after effects of adrenaline. Her breathing is still a little shaky as she pulls a bunch of pillows and blankets into her tiny living room. Pushing her chair and sofa away to make more space as she lays everything out as neat as she could, making the floor a comfy space for her and her two friends to crash for the purge. 
She empties the snacks from out of the plastic bag and piles them in a nice little corner near the TV. A small stack of movies there for when they’re all waiting for the purge to start. Some cards in a pack were also placed there. 
The three of them are wanting to be as quiet as possible while the purge is going on. Everything locked, curtains drawn, lights off, TV with no volume and only subtitles, quiet games to play in case they got bored, etc. 
They weren’t taking any chances. It was doubtful anything would happen, since nothing really ever did in the dorms. No student here would go as far as murdering somebody, everyone mostly stayed inside, not wanting to risk anything. She only knew of a few people that have snuck out before to rob a few stores, or do some petty revenge like smashing someone's car without getting into trouble.
But overall, it was best to remain quiet. They didn’t want to get murdered because the TV was turned up too loudly and attracted some wrong attention. 
It was 5:15 pm.
This is the time her friends arrived. Knocking some made up code on the slab of wood before messaging just for good measure that it was really them outside. 
After unlocking the door and letting her two good friends inside her dorm she swiftly closes and locks it again. Relieved greetings transpire as well as nervous whispers about the purge and some small gossip of who they think would actually go out this year and who are likely to stay inside. 
The three of them start to make their way around her dorm, closing all the curtains and double checking the locks on all the windows and doors. Especially the balcony and front door. 
After they’ve secured the apartment, they turn off all the necessary lights, flicking on a few electrical lanterns and setting them up around the living room, but away from the windows. They’ve left one lantern in the bathroom and one in her bedroom, both turned off, just in case of emergencies.  
The three of them settle in a spread out pile on the blankets she put down in the living room. Some snacks are passed around already and a movie is slotted into the TV, playing as background noise mostly while they talk.
Erica, a sassy but kind of dumb girl, with choppy shoulder length hair that had been bleached and dyed a light green. She's donned in a crop top and sweatpants, comfy.
Don, a friendly giant, very kind in nature but also a little muscly. He has short black hair and a sculpted jawline. He also came in sweatpants and a baggy white T-shirt, also comfy.
Her two very good, and only, friends here. They’re in a few of her classes and all regularly hang out together. 
“So,” Erica begins after her mouthful of powdered donut. “Who do you think is going to actually purge tonight? Like, actually actually. My moneys on them two hotties in my class.” She finishes, wiggling her eyebrows..
Don hums around his half empty soda can. “Yeah, honestly I wouldn't be surprised if they did.”
Y/n pipes up, “Wait who?” sitting up against the sofa behind her, getting comfy like she's about to hear the gossip of a lifetime.
“Oh, Em, G! You haven’t heard of it? You’ve seriously been, like, living under a rock or something.” Erica says jokingly. Picking apart pieces of her donut and eating them. 
Don perks up too. “Really? You haven't?” Y/n shakes her head in denial as Don shrugs. “I get it, it’s mostly stayed in our class, hasn’t spread much further than that.” He says before crawling forward and rummaging around for more snacks.
“So get a load of this right!” Erica sits up too after finishing her donut. Waving her hands excitedly as she tells her latest gossip. “You know them two really hot upperclassmen right?” She draws out her ‘really’ and waits patiently at the end of her sentence for the other girl's confirmation. 
When she nods in slight confusion, Erica continues, “There were some major rumours in class that the two of them were late this one day because they were beating someone up. And I don't mean like a few slaps or hair pulling, I mean punches. You know?”
Y/n nods again, this time with furrowed brows and Erica continues, “At first, I didn’t believe it, obviously. But then, the two of them came into class and I swear there were blood stains on their clothes. Blood stains! Not to mention all the plasters and bandages all over their hands! I just had to believe it then! Wouldn’t you?”
After the end of her long rant she slumps back against the front of the sofa and mumbles incoherently to herself shaking her head while pouting.
Don, who had been listening silently, pipes up, “It was true, I was actually there for once.”
Y/n’s eyebrows raise in disbelief at what she had just heard. Fighting, here? She couldn’t help but to doubt it, if only just a little. Stuff like that has never happened here. Or at least while she had been here. It was just unheard of.
And for an attack so vicious to result in blood being drawn, then there must have been somewhat of a good reason for it. That was the conclusion she came to.
“I mean, there had to have been a good reason for it.” Y/n says, “They’re pretty nice people aren't they? It is Gojo and Geto were talking about here, right? They’re really popular here too.” Her eyes darted between her two friends, looking for more answers on this unexpected juicy gossip.
Erica sighs wistfully, “No, it got shut down pretty quick, which I guess is why so little people have heard about it. God, would I pay to see them fight though. Their muscles must have looked amazing.” 
They stop talking about it after that, Don getting distracted by the snacks and whining about how she didn’t get his favourite. Erica smacking him with a few pillows and complaining how he’s getting in the way of her movie she was barely even watching. 
Their playful banter did little to distract from her inner turmoil. A small shiver went down her spine again. The memory from earlier in the library resurfacing in her mind. Gojo staring her down, the creepy walk back from the shops and now learning the two had at the very least helped in injuring someone.
It could just be because it was purge day, but everything was beginning to creep her out and she was overthinking again. ‘What if he wants to attack me next? What if all of those things were connected and someone really was following me home? What if he wants to kill me? What if both of them want to kill me? Have I ever done anything to offend them? I haven’t, have I?’ She knew these were far fetched and ridiculous, but she couldn’t help but think of them anyway.
Her spiralling thoughts were halted when a stray pillow smacked her in the face. “Oops, haha, sorry.” Erica sheepishly apologized, bringing her hand up to smooth down Y/n’s ruffled hair. Don was laughing in the background.  
Y/n was stunned for a few seconds before replying, “Oh, don’t worry. How about we put something else on? This movie is kind of boring.” crawling across the piles of pillows and blankets to reach the stack of movies.
This caught the other two’s attention, eagerly rushing to the stack as well to try and get first pick. Arguing for a few more minutes before settling on a movie they all loved. Snuggling back into their original positions.
This was how the next few hours went before the announcement appeared.
It was 6:59 pm.
At exactly 7 on the dot, the TV went black before turning blue, the government announcing the commencement of the purge. Big bold letters and ‘Emergency Broadcast System’ and ‘This is not a test’ were displayed on the screen.
They were all quiet as it played out. The mood quickly turned sombre.
“Weapons of class 4 and lower have been authorized for use during the Purge. All other weapons are restricted.”
Don gulped.
“Government officials of ranking 10 have been granted immunity from the Purge and shall not be harmed.”
Erica huffed.
“Commencing at the siren, any and all crime, including murder, will be legal for 12 continuous hours.” 
Y/n shivered.
“Police, fire, and emergency medical services will be unavailable until tomorrow morning at 7 am when The Purge concludes.”
She released a shaky breath. The announcement ends with “...A nation reborn.” before stopping. The screen turned black again.
No one moves or says anything. Each of them were frozen in an array of emotions. Fear being the most prominent. 
The silence stretched on for minutes. Eerie in its wake, not even being able to hear other people in their dorm rooms like she normally would.
Eventually, after releasing another shaky breath and rearranging herself with trembling limbs, they all snap back into the present. 
Don coughs and Erica shuffles awkwardly. 
“Cards, anyone?” Y/n meekly speaks up. The other two nod as they sit in a small circle. 
It was 7:36 pm.
This was when the first explosion of some kind was heard by them. Each of them froze in the middle of playing their mostly silent game of cards. The noise was distant, but the impact remained.
A scream from a few doors down echoed in the silent space.
They waited with baited breath for any follow up, but when nothing happened, they slowly relaxed. Each of them assumed it was the explosion that must have scared someone. Sometimes it’s better to think of the positive, rather than what that scream could have been for.
A few minutes later a siren bellows in the distance, a few car alarms wail.
Nothing too bad, but knowing that it could mean someone was being murdered out there didn’t give them any ease.
It was 8:02 pm. 
This is when the banging starts. Y/n thinks it could be a few doors down again. Erica thinks it’s below them and Don thinks it’s above them. 
Wherever it was, it was concerning. 
Erica releases a small nervous chuckle. “Maybe someone is just having a good time?” A fake smile plastered on her face to try and mask her worry. Even she didn’t believe her little theory. Not during a time like this, during The Purge.
It was a few minutes later, after they had quietly resumed their game, that footsteps were heard.
Clacking down the hallway. 
1, 2.
1, 2. 
1, 2. 
1, 2. 
They were walking at a leisurely pace. Taking their time. Strolling down the hallway and getting closer and closer.
All three of them looked towards the door, as if someone were to burst in at any moment.
The footsteps slow before coming to a stop. Right outside her door.
The three of them hold their breath, bodies flinching when a light knock rings out into the open space.
Complete silence.
Another knock.
None of them had even noticed the earlier noises had stopped, too focused on the potential threat now right outside the door. Seemingly wanting someone to open up.
Three pairs of eyes dart between each other. Silent questions trying to push their way out without being heard. A few panicked half shrugs and furrowed brows with downturned lips later, another knock rings out.
This time it was a little louder.
Barely audible whisperings of ‘you go’, ‘no you’, ‘fuck no’, ‘who even is it?’ cut through the silence. No one wanted to ask the question. To even speak a hint of it lest it result in it coming true.
Eventually after a solid minute of panicked, almost silent, squabbling later. A frustrated and frightened Erica pushed herself up. Taking a very obvious deep breath. Eyes closed and silently mumbling to herself before taking a few steps over to the front door.
She tried to be as quiet as she could but each step sounded like it weighed a ton. Every creek and every wobble made to sound the loudest. 
Very quietly bracing her hands upon the door, she leant up on her tiptoes. Peeking into the peephole positioned in the centre of the door.
The two left in the pile of blankets still. Not wanting to even breathe in fear of disturbing whatever was happening in front of them.
A sudden screech of pure panic and fear tore from Erica’s throat. Flailing before landing with a harsh thud on the floor beneath her. Scrambling backwards on her hands and feet, keeping her eyes on the door the entire time.
The two startle and immediately jump up, laboured breathing hindering their lungs from the sudden scare.
“What the fuck? Erica what happened? What was that?” Don frantically whispered. His eyes were also locked on the door. 
Y/n also whispered to her, “Who was that? Erica?” her eyes locked onto her friend, not able to bring herself to look at the door yet.
“It was.. Oh god.. The peep..” Erica wheezed out. The fright took too much out of her with her frantic gasps for air.
A sudden bang echoed into the room. A few more followed before they all realized it was coming from the front door. 
Erica screeched and threw herself back into a standing position, rushing for the kitchen and grabbing any sharp knife her eyes first laid on.
Don stood frozen in fear. Not able to move or barely breathe from the looks of it.
Y/n wasn’t any better herself. Downright terrified. This was her dorm. Her dorm. Which means whoever was outside, was looking for her.
The banging persisted, the person on the other side seemingly determined to get in. This proved correct when the handle started turning whichever way it could. 
She didn’t even realize, terror clouding her senses because when she looked back to her two friends, Don had collapsed into himself, wheezing with little air entering his lungs amidst his panic. Erica was cornered in the kitchen, sobbing, tears flooding her cheeks and ruining her mascara she had in place.
The persistent banging stopped for a second. The faint sound of another pair of footsteps approached from the hallway outside. Muffled talking pursued but it was hard to make anything out, between her pounding heart, Erica’s sobs and the slab of wood in the way, didn’t make for easy hearing.
For Y/n, it seemed there was one second of complete silence. No sobbing, no voices, no distant alarms or explosions, no racing heart, no wheezing lungs. Before chaos sprung onto them.
Suddenly the people outside, because there was another person now, resumed banging on the door. But it didn’t seem like they were ‘just knocking’ anymore. No.
They were trying to break the door down. 
She could see it from the way the door groaned and creaked under the relentless kicking. She couldn't quite tell if they were using their feet, or an object, or whatever. 
All that mattered was that they were trying to get in. And they were going to succeed.
“Move! Hide! We need to hide!” She whisper-yelled. Rushing to Don and tugging on his arm to try and get him to move. He stared at her for a few seconds before his brain caught up, registering what was happening around him. The real danger he was in right now.
“Hide.. Oh god..” He panted, sprinting for the bathroom, the first place his eyes had landed on.
With Don now searching for a place to hide, she ran her way to Erica. Still trying to be as quiet as she could, in the little hopes that they would think she wasn’t here.
“Erica, we need to hide! They’re getting in!” She frantically whispered to her hyperventilating friend. Trying to shake her shoulders, even resorting to lightly slapping her face to try and get her attention. She was desperate.
“Please!” The sound of splintering caught both of their attention. Heads whipping towards the door starting to cave. She wasn’t all that surprised, that slab of wood was a shitty excuse for a door anyway.
Erica suddenly sprung up and dove for the piles of blankets in the living room. Trying to bury herself amongst them, taking the knife with her.
And now that all her friends had been taken care of, she ran for her bedroom. Trying her best not to stumble and fall in the dark hallway. 
As soon as her door came into sight, she gently opened it, gunning for her wardrobe tucked into the corner of the room. Not even looking towards the turned off lantern, she didn’t need them knowing her hiding spot from something so obvious. 
It was already messy anyway, so in her frazzled brain she didn’t bother caring where she tossed piles of clothes and shoes in her room.. They’d hopefully think it was like that in the first place.
After quickly clearing a space big enough for her to curl into, she did just that. Situating herself just right, back pressed against the side of the wardrobe, knees tucked to her chest and pressed against the boxes in front of her. She was sitting on old shirts she hadn’t seen for months.
Hearing the door breaking even further, she grabbed any clothes within her reach and threw them over herself. Shutting the door when she was mostly covered, she could have sworn she could hear laughter coming from the hallway.
A loud crash and splintering tore through the air. She knew it was her front door. And now they were inside. 
Her hands slowly went up to cup around her mouth, trying to muffle her breathing as much as she could. Her body froze. Even when she already began to feel muscle cramps settling in, she dared not move. She forced herself to breathe slowly. Every inhale a struggle along with a reminder that she was still alive at this very moment. Even if she was convinced she wouldn’t be for much longer. 
The thought brought tears to her eyes. The original shock wears from her body and settles into something akin to despair. 
Her throat started clamping up, muscles seizing and throbbing with the need to cry. 
It was the thudding of footsteps that shook her out of it. Snapping her half way back into a nightmarish reality. 
She gulped. Closing her eyes and straining her ears for any information they were willing to receive.
Just as she thought. Two pairs of footsteps. 
With every thud of a shoe or a spike in their muffled talking, her body would tremble. 
It remained like this for a few more minutes. The footsteps or talking occasionally pausing. 
It was during one of these silences, where a different sound was heard. She couldn’t identify the exact sounds, just ones of commotion. They were still all muffled. And then she heard muffled yelling. 
It sounded so dulled, between the walls and layers of wood and clothes, she could barely make out anything, her ears straining for any hint as to what was happening. Being left in the dark like this, literally and figuratively, was terrifying her. 
And then this horrible, awful noise carried its way between the cracks in the wardrobe. Crunching. Cracking. Stomps. 
That muffled yelling from before kept getting cut off. Eventually dwindling down into a barely audible groan. Those thuds never seemed to stop either. Never ending, crunching, cracking, and now wet thuds. 
Her brain was trying its hardest to process, to catch up with the information that it has been provided with. 
More footsteps, only one pair, accompanied with muffled laughter. And a more distinct sound traveling through the air. 
A scream.
Even more laughter, hurried footsteps and pleas of ‘no’, ‘please’, ‘don’ts’. 
It was now, with the wet stomps still in the background, her screeching friend, that eager laugh, that her brain had finally caught up.
She was going to be sick.
They’re hurting them. Killing them.
Her friends.
Her body moved out of its own violation. Shaky hands and feet kicking and pushing their way out of the pile of clothes. Wardrobe door swinging open with a creak.
She collapsed out of it. Slumped on the floor, dry heaving. Her lungs not seeming to take enough air in but yet holding in too much. She couldn’t function. Fear overwhelmed every part of her. As well as grief. 
Her ears were ringing and she was left gasping, drool dripping onto the hard floor beneath her as a result of her attempted vomiting. Eyes wide open, blurry when she tapped back into her mind. 
Tears, clouding her vision and dripping audibly on the floorboards below her. 
In the distance she could hear muffled talking. Two men, she could make out more clearly. Not only that, but squelching, wet, gooey noises seemed to mingle in the air. Gurgling was the next before silence.
A minute passed, maybe two before the footsteps started up again. Those goddamn footsteps. 
1.. 2.
1.. 2.
1.. 2.
But they were slower than before. Steady. Taking their time. 
And getting closer.
Her instincts kick in, blinking profusely to try and clear her eyes from the tears, looking up and darting around before landing on the space under her bed.
She wouldn’t have enough time to fix her spot back in the wardrobe. She couldn’t run past them, not even in her best state which she certainly wasn’t in right now. She had considered her bedroom window as an option, but it was locked, which would take time to open. Not even mentioning the fact she was on the third floor, so jumping out would break at least something important. They would be quick to notice as well, and if they came for her, it was likely they would decide to chase her down.
Under her bed seemed to be her best option at the moment, and she was running out of time. Scrambling as quietly as she could, she slid herself directly under her bed, trying to center herself in the middle of it, tucking herself into a tight ball.
The footsteps stopped right outside her bedroom door, she had enough sense to shut it on her way in, thank god. But that clearly wouldn’t be enough to stop them. 
Almost as if the person was teasing her, they slowly clicked the door open. The distinct creak she had grown accustomed to over the months making itself known. 
Her muscles are tense, tightening in the presence of her predators. 
In the dark space from under her bed and in her room, it was obvious when the light from inside the hallway started spilling in the more the door got pushed open. In the vague depths of her mind it registered that they must’ve either turned the hall lights on, had taken one of her lanterns,  or were carrying one of their own.
Her lungs were burning with the effort to keep her body running with the little air she was allowing them to have, all for the sake of trying to keep quiet.
It was all too silent once again, only for a second or two before the second pair of footsteps came towards her. A lot more hasty compared to the other ones. 
Her breath silently hitched, the new person pushed their way into the room, stepping past their company before a thunk was heard. The sound forced her body to startle, jolting her muscles and kick starting her trembling again. An uncontrollable reaction to the fear she was under, the unrelenting motions causing a deep ache in her ribs.
The sound of rustling was now heard. It seemed they were looking for something. ‘They’re going to kill me. They’re digging around for a weapon to stab me with, to bash my head in, to murder me like they did my friends. I’m dead. I’m dead, I’mdeadI’mdeadI’mdead-’
Her racing thoughts consuming her fear riddled mind failed in picking up the sound of the other pair of footsteps slowly creeping round to the end of her bed. 
The person paused, silently crouching down low before a pair of hands reached under.
The sudden tight grip on her ankles followed up by the sudden pull had her screeching. Pure terror flooding her veins. She had been yanked out from under her bed, lying sprawled on the floor and gazing up at the towering man stationed above her. 
Her lungs burned, seizing up before a sickening scream escaped her. Fuelled by genuine, unrestrained horror. 
They had found her.
One of her lanterns they had brought in illuminated his face in a haunting light. The darkened shadows stretching and contorting behind him to create the most grim image for her mind to paint. Not that it was far off.
A foot standing on either side of her hips, straddling her if it wasn’t for his standing position. Hands nestled comfortably back in his trouser pockets now they had done the job of retrieving her. A comfortable looking long-sleeved shirt adorned his figure. Dark splatters starting from the bottom of his shoes and creeping their way up his legs, tapering off into a few spots that painted one of his cheeks.
An easy smile softly ingrained on his face, followed by gentle looking eyes peering down at her if it wasn’t for the malicious spiral she found herself paralyzed in. Dark locks of hair extended down his back, past where she could see from her position, with the top layers sectioned off and tied back into a bun.
His mouth opened and he spoke. “Well, well. Look what I’ve caught for us Satoru.”
Satoru. The other man must be Satoru Gojo, and this was Suguru. Suguru Geto. The most popular guys she knew, the supposedly kindest. And then staring in the library, the walk back from the shops, the gossip her most likely dead friend had told her.
Her body suddenly felt like it was pumped full of adrenaline. Pushing herself up as fast as she could, using the bed as support all the while stumbling over her numb riddled legs. She took off, running towards the open door she so desperately wanted to pass through. 
A sudden arm snatched her from around her waist and she screeched. Pure instinct driving her at this point as she scratched and kicked and flailed in his, Satoru Gojo’s, hold.
The sound of something dropping before his other arm came round, collecting both her wrists in one hand of his. His grip tightened the more she fought. Her body pressed tight against his, her back to his front. His head situated itself on her shoulder, tucking over and pressing his cheek to hers even while she cried and panted and kicked.
She could feel his grin pressing against the side of her face. “Such a pretty little thing we have here. Can’t let her get away so easily now, can we? Not after all the trouble we’ve gone through.” The last part practically whispered into her ear as she turned her face as far away as possible from him. 
A little laugh boasted out from Geto. “Of course not.” He strolled over to them, bending down to pick up what Gojo had dropped in order to restrain her.
Rope.
Fucking rope.
The moment her eyes zoned in and processed what Geto was unravelling in his hands she tried to fight back even harder. Eyes flooding with tears that spilled down her cheeks. Short mumblings of ‘no’ being repeated over and over while becoming louder until she was yelling. 
“Please don’t do this! Let me go! Please, please.. Stop!” She shrieked while sobbing, convinced they were going to kill her or torture her or something horrible like that.
Gojo walked the two of them to the edge of her bed before forcefully pushing her down, manhandling her onto her front and bending her arms to rest pressing against her back.  
She sobbed into her ruffled sheets as she felt Geto fastening the rope tight around her wrists, the rough material digging into and pinching the sensitive skin. Raw and red marks already forming amidst her struggle. 
Her legs still hung off the bed, trying their best to kick and hopefully injure one or both of them, but she knew it was a losing battle. None of her landing blows made them falter in any way.
When her wrists were successfully restrained Geto kept them pressed to the small of her back while Gojo let go and reached down to grab her ankles. Pulling them up and bending her legs at the knees while they both worked in finishing the task of tying her up.
When they finally stepped back to admire the work they’d successfully done, Y/n deflated. Tears soaking into her bed in which she rested on top of. Her lungs still burned, having never stopped. The hogtied position she had been forced into leaving her nothing to work with in terms of escaping. Not that she could think clearly anyway. The distress she was under proved too much.
“Oh, Shh Sh Sh… There, there, sweet thing. Settle down for us now. We aren’t going to kill you.” Cooed, who she could only guess right now was Gojo.
Geto reached forward from his position of kneeling on the bed, gentle soothing pets stroking her hair. Her sobbing tapering off into hiccupped breathing even while flinching with every touch. “There you go, good girl. See that wasn’t so hard now, was it?”
He pulled away from her, stepping down off the bed and heading towards the previously discarded bag on the floor Y/n hadn’t noticed before..
Y/n slowly turned her head round, no longer pressed into her sheets. Her eyes were red and bloodshot, swollen from all the crying she’d been doing. Little hiccups and groans left her while her lungs tried to recover. She’d given up struggling right now, it had done nothing but cause her pain as the rope dug and squeezed the skin of her wrists and ankles. 
Gojo piped up from behind her, only now feeling the heat from his legs pressing into hers causing her to flinch. “You know, this would’ve gone a whole lot easier if you had just let us in sweetheart.” She could practically hear the smug smile in his voice. “Look at where you are now, tied up all pretty for us. Ripe for the taking.” He pressed closer to her at that, voice practically dripping with need. 
She whined in fear and started squirming at his words. Panic flooding her senses again for just a second before a sharp tug to her hair had her yelping, halting her movements.
“I thought I told you to quit that.” Geto was back to kneeling on the bed in front of her, his hand gripping tight onto her hair, eyes narrowed. 
Her bottom lip trembled, breaths picking up with every second he glared down at her. 
“Don’t be so mean, Sugu.” Gojo said, a teasing lilt in his voice. 
Geto glanced back at him before humming and letting go of his harsh grip, her scalp burning in turn. “I suppose you’re right. She’ll have plenty of time to learn when we take her back home.”
Gojo hummed and she felt him leaning away from her, hearing him crouch down and fiddle with something from the bag as well. 
“Back home?..” She stuttered, voice hoarse and throat dry.
Geto looked back down at her, amusement painting his face. “Yes. Home.”
“Where..” She started, face formed in a twist of concern and confusion. “Please.. I.. Just let me go. I won’t- I won’t tell anyone, I’ll- I’ll leave you alone, I’ll do anything, please..” She gasped out, tears gathered freshly in her eyes again, voice cracking every few seconds. 
An amused eyebrow raised with the hint of a smirk at the corner of his mouth was all she got as a response. 
Gojo had come back, reaching round and fastening a strip of duct tape around her mouth in a sudden flurry of movement. Giving her no time to process what he had done until after he had done it. 
She cried out, the sound muffled thanks to the tape, worried eyes darting around in panic as she tried squirming again for the third time. 
Gojo pressed up behind her once again. “You’re not going anywhere, sweet pea! You’re ours now. We’ve had you picked out for a long time now.” The joy in his voice didn’t fail to put her on edge, his words doing their part in helping the tears gathered in her waterline to finally spill down her cheeks. Wetting the tape situated over her lips.
“He’s right.” Geto replied. Bringing one of his hands up to show what he had collected from the bag a few moments ago. The mobile phone in his hands glowed brightly in the dark room, the lamp from before having been moved, the light now dim.
“We’ll bring you back with us soon enough, but we still have a few more hours to kill before that. And why waste them.” Gojo said, the grin in his voice unsettling her, keeping her frozen in fear.
An easy smile pulled at Geto’s cheeks at that, head tilting to the side to gaze down at their pretty prey. 
“Well what are you waiting for then, Satoru?”
A pause. Smile pulling into a predatory grin.
“Have at it.”
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joelalorian · 3 months
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Fall Into Me
dbf!Joel x f!reader
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The first TLOU fic I ever read was a dbf!Joel story and it left an indelible mark on my soul. Unfortunately, I never bookmarked it so I have no idea which one it was. It's only natural that I had to try my hand at one at some point. So, here we are.
Summary: Joel is hanging on by a thread as a single father to a tenacious 10-year-old Sarah. Feeling like he's drowning, like the world is about to spit him out, he needs some help before he breaks in half. At your dad's insistence, you show up in his life and change everything.
Story is inspired by the song Fall Into Me by Forest Blakk. Chapter titles will be lyrics from the song.
Word Count: 4.1k
Series Warnings: Mature to start, but will ultimately be Explicit, under 18 take a hike. No outbreak AU. There will be angst, drama, fluff, humor, romance, smut... basically, the works. Age gap of about 9 years (Reader 24/25, Joel 33/34). No use of y/n. Reader has a nickname from her dad, which will be explained at some point.
Dividers by the wonderful @saradika-graphics
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
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Chapter One: The Day That I Met You
If you asked him over a decade ago where he’d be now, Joel Miller would not have placed himself as a single father to a tenacious pre-teen desperately trying to keep things afloat. He spent too many hours in the week working to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table. He would be lost without the help of his brother and the few friends he had. He had no social life to speak of and could not for the life of him remember the last time he went on an actual date.
No, back then, Joel thought he’d be living the good life in ten years’ time – traveling, going out with the boys, maybe have a girlfriend or wife. Basically, just getting to do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. Don’t get him wrong, though. He was still living a good life; it just was a different sort of good than what he hoped for back in the day.
He loved his daughter with every fiber of his being. Sarah was the best damn thing that ever happened to him, his entire world, and he wouldn’t change the past ten years for anything. He bent over backwards doing whatever it took to make his little girl feel cared for, happy, and loved. He just wished there was a little energy left for something for himself at the end of the day.
Joel Miller was drained. Mentally, physically, and emotionally.
He awoke with a groan as the bright sunlight broke through the gap in his curtains. It was Saturday – his birthday – and he hoped to sleep in, at least a little. Between the brightness of the morning and the stifled sounds of clanging pans and voices carrying up the stairs from his kitchen, sleeping in was not happening.
He hauled himself out of bed with a groan worthy of a man twenty years his senior and stretched out his limbs to ease the achiness in his bare back and chest from too much manual labor. Throwing on a pair of well-worn sleep pants and a faded tee shirt, Joel slipped from his bedroom and down the stairs. He moved rather quietly for a man of his size, stealing a moment to lean against the entryway into the kitchen and watch as Sarah and Tommy worked together making breakfast.
The counters were a mess of spilled pancake mix, eggshells, and… was that coffee dripping over the edge and onto the floor? It was a toss-up on who made the bigger mess, his ten-year-old daughter, or his grown ass brother. Still, Joel could not stop the smile spreading across his face as he watched them laughing and teasing each other. That, right there, was the reason he worked so hard, why the loneliness was worth it.
When Tommy flipped the stovetop off, Sarah turned to find her dad smiling goofily at them. “Happy Birthday, Dad!” she exclaimed, launching herself at his chest. Her lanky arms wrapped around his neck as he lifted her off the ground in a big bear hug.
“Thanks, baby girl,” Joel replied, pressing his lips to her forehead in a quick kiss before he settled her feet on the ground.
“We made you breakfast!” Sarah declared, gesturing toward the disaster zone formerly known as his kitchen.
“I see that,” he chuckled, voice still slightly rough with sleep.
Tommy turned with a smirk, hands grasping two plates filled with bacon, eggs, and pancakes. “Take a seat, brother. Let us take care of you on your birthday.” Placing the food on the small dining table, Tommy roughly patted his brother’s shoulders. “Don’t worry ‘bout the mess, I’m on cleanup duty after we eat.”
“We expectin’ company? That’s a helluva lot of food,” Joel grumbled. He needed coffee, stat.
“Yeah, JB is comin’ over to see ya before heading to the airport. His daughter finished grad school over the summer and is moving back home.” Tommy set more food and a full mug of dark roast coffee in front of his brother. The scent alone made Joel perk up a little.
The Millers hadn’t met you yet, having only become friends with your dad through work after you’d already left for college on the east coast. Your dad had a good decade on Joel, but he and the Miller brothers got on like a forest fire from what he told you. With visits home always short and rushed, busy catching up with family and your own friends, there was never time for your dad to introduce you all. Now you were coming home for good and would have plentiful opportunities for spending time with your dad and his friends.
“Speak of the devil,” Tommy muttered as the doorbell rang. Sarah bounded to the door to greet your dad with a hug. In many ways, the girl reminded him of you when you were young, and it always brought a smile to his face.
“There he is! The man of the hour. Happy Birthday, buddy!” Your dad, John, or JB as the Millers called him, ruffled Joel’s already mussed hair, leaving a few locks standing straight up in further disarray. Pulling a 12-pack of beer from behind his back, your dad set it on the table in front of Joel, topped with a little red bow. “I gotcha a lil’ something to celebrate.”
“Good man,” Joel replied with a chuckle. “Have a seat and help me eat all this. Tommy just told me your lil’ girl is coming home, finally.”
Your dad’s face lit up even more at the mention of you coming home. “She’s not so little anymore, but I sure am glad she’s moving back here. Said she had enough of the east coast, but I think she just missed her ol’ man.” After wolfing down some food, he added, “Think we could host a small barbecue here this coming weekend to celebrate? Your backyard is way nicer than mine and you got the pool and all.”
“Not to mention that fancy ass grill,” Tommy chimed in.
Swallowing a long sip of his morning go juice, Joel nodded. “Of course. Invite whoever you want. I’m looking forward to finally meeting your daughter.”
“Me too!” Sarah added. She heard a lot about you from your dad and hoped you were as cool in person as he made you out to be.
Joel’s mind started spinning upon hearing his daughter’s excitement. With her school hours being so different from his typical work hours, he was spending a small fortune on after school care for Sarah. She was still too young for him to leave home alone, especially on those days where he’s stuck late at a job. He was barely scraping by as it was and couldn’t really afford the cost of after school programs. Perhaps…
“JB, ya think your daughter would mind watching Sarah during the week while she’s home. Drop off and pick up from school and keeping her company ‘til I get home from work? I could pay her – it wouldn’t be much, but better than nothin’, I imagine.” He watched Sarah’s eyes light up at the suggestion and knew it was a good choice.
“I’m sure she’d love to. She wasn’t planning on finding a real job until after the holidays, so I know she’ll be free during the day,” your dad replied. “I’ll talk to her about it on the ride back from the airport and let you know.”
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Three suitcases and a carry-on bag. That’s all you had left from six and a half years of pursuing higher education in North Carolina. You sold or gave away anything that did not fit into your luggage or hold sentimental value of your time away. Now, you were moving back home to save some money before you had to start chipping away at the mountain of student loan debt you accrued.
You loved learning, always have, but you were relieved to be done with school. Equipped with a bachelor’s degree in earth sciences and a master’s in education, you felt like a real adult ready to take the world of middle school by storm… well, starting after the new year, maybe. For now, you needed several months of limited to no responsibility to recoup your mental and physical energy. That last couple years of school really burned you out. Not to mention the last-minute rejection of a teaching position you thought was in the bag…
Anyway, you were better off leaving North Carolina behind and returning to Austin. You missed your dad something fierce and his particular brand of caring for you was exactly what your weary soul needed. It was you and him against the world, just like when you were a kid.
You flight was smooth and uneventful, yet you were relieved to deboard the plane. Something about being stuck in a tin can at the mercy of someone else’s ability to keep the thing from plummeting to the ground really aggravated your anxiety. Flying was something you would never enjoy; it was merely a means to an end when you wanted to travel long distances.
The journey to baggage claim was a slog with the crowd of passengers all heading to the same place. You were wondering how you’d wrangle three large suitcases by yourself when you caught sight of your dad. His broad smile took over his face when he spotted you, rushing over to sweep you up in a big bear hug.
“Hey Spud, how was the flight?” he asked as you waited for the baggage carousel to begin moving. “Looks like it was a full plane.”
“It was, but the flight was good. I’m really glad to be home.”
“Me, too, kid.”
You settled into a comfortable silence, watching various pieces of luggage pass by on the carousel. Your bags were scattered, and you had to wait several cycles to get all of them. Your dad lugged the final suitcase over the carousel with a grunt. “Jesus, what you got in this one? Bricks? A body?”
“That one has my gaming system and half a closet full of clothes,” you replied with a laugh.
Before long, everything was loaded into your dad’s truck, and you were heading back towards town. The radio hummed at a low volume as you both chatted about everything and nothing all at once.
“Hey, so I know you said you weren’t looking for full-time work until after the new year, but I have a proposition for you.” Your dad’s eyes stayed focused on the road, and you merely quirked a brow waiting for him to continue. “My buddy Joel – you know the one I told you about? Well, his daughter is ten and he needs some help with the school run and after school care. Our work hours aren’t exactly the same as elementary school, you know?”
You nodded, remembering all the times your dad spoke to you about Joel, as well as his daughter and brother. Despite never meeting them, you felt like you already knew their whole life story. “So, he’s looking for a nanny or something? I could do that. It would keep me from getting lazy while I navigate getting my Texas teaching certificate.”
Your dad grinned, one hand patting your leg. “I was hoping you’d say that. Joel will pay you, of course, but just… don’t expect much. It ain’t easy for him being a single dad trying to keep everything afloat.”
Again, you nodded, a soft smile creasing your lips. You knew all too well how challenging it could be for single parents, having grown up with just you and your dad. Much like what your dad told you about Joel’s experience with the mother of his child, your mom split when you were barely a toddler. Things weren’t always sunshine and roses, but your dad sure did his best to make sure you had a great life. Honestly, you wouldn’t trade it for the world, that life with your dad. You had a feeling it was much the same for Joel and his daughter.
“I’m happy to help, even if he doesn’t pay me. I’m sure his daughter will enjoy having a female influence in her life if nothing else. What’s her name again? Sarah?”
Your dad’s eyes twinkled with pride. “Yup, that’s it. I’m proud of the woman you’ve become, Spud.”
A mist of tears prickled your eyes as you mumbled out a “Thanks, dad.” After a beat, you added, “Must you keep up with that nickname?”
“Of course. You’ll always be my little Spud,” he laughed as you rolled your eyes. “Oh, by the way, we’re going to the Millers on Saturday for your welcome home party.”
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“What’s all this?” Joel questioned as Tommy and Sarah placed a heavy, wrapped package on the table before him along with a few smaller presents. The remains of a birthday cake sat nearby, having been delightfully devoured by the Millers while celebrating Joel’s birthday.
“Just a little somethin’ from me and Sarah,” Tommy replied, a boyish grin alighting his handsome features.
Joel gazed between them with curiosity. Not big on celebrating his own aging, he rarely got big gifts. “You wanna help me open this, nugget?” Sarah’s eyes lit up, small hands reaching to tear the wrapping paper into shreds. It only took a few moments for the contents to be revealed, leaving Joel confused at the modern contraption sitting in front of him. “What am I supposed to do with this?”
“You play video games on it, dumbass.” Tommy harumphed as he began a diatribe on the features of the gaming system – he had one just like it at his place and it provided hours of entertainment when he didn’t feel like going out. “I figured it would be a good hobby for you since you never want to join me in going out.”
“Huh,” Joel grunted in return, brows furrowed as he read the instructions on how to setup up the machine. His attention was diverted by Sarah shoving the smaller parcels into his lap.
“Here, dad! These go with it.” Together, they tore into the wrapping paper to find several video games, a few of which were family friendly. The final gift was a spare controller for the gaming system so he and Sarah could play together.
Despite still being unsure that the gift was a good fit for him, Joel was grateful to Tommy for the effort. “This is too much, man. You shouldn’t spend this kind of money on me, Tommy.”
His brother waved him off. “I found a great deal and you never get anything for yourself, brother. You deserve something to indulge in. Believe me, you’ll have fun with this.”
The rest of the evening was spent with Tommy setting up the system and showing the father-daughter duo how to play some of the games he picked out. The living room filled with lots of laughter and teasing, and Joel found himself really getting into the fun of the video games.
After tucking Sarah into bed, Tommy showed Joel a game that was too violent for the little girl but entertaining for the men. The game was set in Washington DC which had been ravaged by a brutal pandemic and the main character was part of a group of agents fighting off nefarious gangs trying to take over the city. Joel caught onto the gameplay quickly and the two men found themselves building the loadout for Joel’s character, taking out bad guys, and chatting well into the night.
At two in the morning, the pair looked at each other with bleary, red-rimmed eyes and finally called it a night. Joel directed Tommy to crash in the spare room as he shuffled off to bed upstairs.
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It didn’t take you long to get settled into your dad’s house. It wasn’t the home you grew up in and you only visited a few times after he bought it. After years living away on your own, you thought it would be an adjustment being under his roof again, but it wasn’t. He understood the need for personal space and never hovered unless you were hurt or sick. He gave you the downstairs bedroom – it was the largest in the house, with an ensuite bath and huge walk-in closet.
“Dad, no! Why in the world is this not your room?” you questioned when he placed your bags on the brand-new, king size bed he had delivered the week prior.
“Hell no, Spud. What do I need all this space for? I like the upstairs rooms better – the light is all wrong in this one anyway.”
You looked around, holding in a giggle. The room faced south, giving you just the right amount of natural light all day. That’s what your dad didn’t like. He preferred to live like a bat in a cave with blackout curtains and limited lighting.
“Alright, well, I love it. The natural light is perfect for me. I can actually put some plants on the windowsills. Thank you!” You kissed his cheek as he left you to get settled.
You spent the week rearranging the bedroom how you wanted it, setting up your gaming system, and putting all your clothes into the walk-in closet. Your dad hadn’t done much with the room other than furnish it, so you made a few trips to the store to get a bathroom set, floor lamps, and wall décor to make the room your own.
Before you knew it, Saturday morning dawned bright and warm. The day of your welcome home gathering arrived, and you would finally get to meet the Millers. An excited energy had you moving about your space in a flurry, tidying up and getting ready early. You’d seen some photos of the Millers that your dad sent you – Sarah was adorable with her dark, springy curls, and Joel… Joel was handsome, in a broody, overworked kind of way, with dark, riotous curls and big, warm chocolate eyes. Kind eyes, you called them.
“Hey Spud, you ready?” your dad called from the kitchen as you put the finishing touches on your hair. It was pinned up, leaving the smooth skin of your neck bare. The sundress you picked hugged your curves in just the right way, falling just at your knees in a flow of lightweight material. In early October, Austin was still hot, and you hoped the Millers’ yard was shaded.
“Bring a swimsuit! They have a pool!” he yelled as you grabbed the last of your things. Turning back to your closet, you grabbed a dark green one-piece suitable for family-friendly swimming and tucked it into your bag.
“I’m ready!”
Your dad smiled at the sight of you. “Let’s go then. We’re heading over early so you can officially meet the Millers and we’ll help them setup before everyone else arrives.”
“Sounds good. Who all’s coming anyway?” Your eyes widened as your dad rattled off a list of people he invited, including his work buddies and some of his and Joel’s neighbors. He would have invited some of your old friends from high school, but you all lost touch over the years. The party was turning out bigger than you thought. Your heart swelled with how happy your dad was to have you home for good.
The Millers lived in the same neighborhood, only a few blocks away, so close you could have walked if not for the scorching sun. The drive took only a few minutes before your dad pulled into the driveway of a two-story home similar to your dad’s, with simple landscaping and two wooden rocking chairs on the wide porch. Lovely and quaint, the house made you more curious about the people who lived there.
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“Dayum! Get a load a JB’s daughter, Joel,” Tommy called from the living room, leaning over the couch to look out the front window. “She’s smokin’ hot!”
“Dammit, Tommy. Stop spying on ‘em,” Joel growled, sneaking a peek over his brother’s shoulder to do a little hypocritical spying of his own. Breath caught in his throat at the sight of you and he couldn’t break his gaze away, even as JB led you toward the front door.
“What was that about spyin’, brother?” Tommy teased, practically dragging Joel away from the window as a knock sounded against the door. “Don’t worry, I’ll get it.”
Tommy opened the heavy wooden door revealing the pair of you standing there, matching bright eyes and wide grins greeting him. “Well, hello there, beautiful. I’m Tommy.” Reaching a hand toward you, Tommy completely ignored JB, who just scowled at him.
“Nice to meet you, Tommy,” you replied, offering him your hand and name in return. Joel’s scowl matched your dad’s expression as Tommy held your hand for several beats too long.
“Back off, Tommy,” your dad grunted, swatting at the younger Miller brother. “This here is Tommy’s brother, Joel. The one who actually owns this house and the better Miller, if you ask me.”
“Ain’t no one askin’ you, old man,” Tommy’s smart mouth shot back at your dad.
Joel ignored both men, eyes like dark pools as he gazed at you, awed at how small and delicate your hand felt in his. “Howdy, darlin’,” his voice rumbled from his chest. “Come on in. There’s someone else lookin’ forward to meeting you.”
Leading the way through the kitchen into the backyard, Joel felt the heat of your gaze burning his back. Were you checking him out? There was no way. You were beautiful and likely in your early twenties. He felt ancient, though he was only in his early thirties, the hard labor of construction work having taken its toll on him.
“Hi Dad!” a young, sweet voice called from a small swing set where a precious little girl entertained herself. “Who’s this?”
Joel introduced you to his daughter, leaving the two of you to get acquainted as your dad called him away.
“You were away at college?” Sarah questioned, motioning for you to take a seat on the swing next to hers.
“I was,” you replied. “But I’m back for good now.”
“That’s good. What grade did you get to? I’m in fourth grade.”
You thought about it a moment. “I guess it would be 18th grade. But you stop counting grade numbers after 12th and start using different words to describe what year you’re in during college.”
Sarah listened raptly while you explained the different terms, what you studied in school, and what kind of job you were hoping to get.
“You want to be a teacher?” she asked, awed.
“I do! I want to teach middle grade science.”
“I love science! Maybe you could be my teacher when I get to sixth grade!”
Joel returned with your dad and Tommy in tow to find you and Sarah having a blast. The little girl sat in your lap as you kicked your feet out, swinging as high as you could, singing some camp song you remembered from your youth.
“See? Told ya she’d love to spend time with Sarah,” your dad said to Joel. He couldn’t tear his gaze away, staring at the two of you with a glazed look in his dark eyes.
Shaking himself off, Joel turned to your dad. “Guess I better work out some details with her.” He stepped over to the swing set, taking a seat on the empty swing and hoping to the heavens above that it held his weight. He struggled internally on how to start the conversation and was just about to blurt something out when his amazing daughter saved the day.
“Dad! She wants to be a teacher! A science teacher! Isn’t that cool? Did you ask her about watching me yet? I think she’d love to.” Sarah rambled on excitedly, amusing you and Joel. Turning to you before Joel could chime in, Sarah turned to you with baby cow eyes, adding, “You would love to, right?”
How could you ever resist that look? No one could. Both you and Joel were powerless as you nodded, and the offer became official. Cell numbers were exchanged and before you knew it, you had a job starting Monday.
Hours later, slightly drunk on spiked fruit punch and buzzing with energy, you thanked Joel for hosting the barbecue and giving you a job. You kissed his stubbled cheek, forcing thoughts of how attractive he was as far down as they could go. You could not develop a crush on your boss. “I’ll see you Monday morning, bright and early!” you declared before following your dad through the front door.
TBC
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callme-holly · 2 months
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Hello!! Maybe you could write headcannons with the gang that have a s/o who’s getting picked on? Thank you!!
𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐚𝐧𝐠 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐒/𝐎 𝐖𝐡𝐨’𝐬 𝐆𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐏𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐎𝐧
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𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 - I go back to school in like 2 days... yay, im so thrilled... Also I'm so sorry this took be so long to get to, my inbox is crazy right now but I swear I will get to everyone eventually !! Anyways, hope ya'll enjoy and as always my asks are still open for requests!!
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 - 864 words
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 - mentions of being jumped and fighting, that's it
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Darry Curtis - 
If Darry found out you were getting picked on by someone, he would go mental
Like he’d be pissed
He’d instantly want to know who it is who’s giving you trouble 
If it’s the socs bothering you you best believe he’s walking everywhere with you 
His concern would go through the roof 
Darry doesn’t strike me as a typically violent person but if whoever is bothering you decides to jump you/cause you any physical harm, you best believe he’s starting something 
If you’re upset, please let him take care of you, it’ll help calm him down somewhat
Sodapop Curtis - 
If Soda finds out someone’s giving you trouble, he’ll instantly feel guilty
He takes it as his job to look after you and by someone hurting you either physically or verbally, he can’t help but feel like he’s let you down a little
He’ll get Steve to track down whoever it is who’s picking on you; you won’t have to worry about them anymore <33
He’ll cuddle with you for ages to try and make you feel better (although it’s mainly to help reassure himself that you’re okay) 
Much like Darry, Soda will walk you everywhere
This boy will not risk leaving your side and if anyone so much as looks your way, he’s giving them a dirty look and pulling you in the opposite direction 
Ponyboy Curtis - 
Pony will feel horrible and a little annoyed when you tell him you’re getting picked on
If it’s the socs giving you trouble, he’s mad
He’ll walk you to and from places and will try to comfort you best he can
If it’s kids from school, he’s got your back 
Pony will defend your case no matter what and if someone so much as says anything about you, he’s shutting them down with some smart comment real fast
And if you get jumped? Oh boy, he feels awful 
He knows what it’s like to get jumped first hand and he’d never wish it upon anyone
He’d get Dallas to have a “word” with whoever it is bothering you and chances are, you won’t see them again after that 
Johnny Cade - 
Johnny gets so upset when he hears that someone is picking on you but he also gets really angry 
Like, you don’t deserve anything bad that comes to you and he will do anything to protect you
I feel like people really down-play his character like, come on ya’ll, he literally stabbed someone to protect his friend 
If he sees someone giving you grief, he’s standing up for you 
He wouldn’t start a fight, no, but he’s definitely let them know what's up
If you get jumped, he’d comfort you in a heartbeat <33 
You two have got the whole gang backing you both up, so there really isn’t anything to worry about when you’re with Johnny 
Dallas Winston - 
Oh, Dallas… 
When he finds out you’re being picked on, he’s asking for names, appearances, addresses - you name it, this boy wants it
He will fight for you and he will make sure that whoever it is that’s bothering you, learns their lesson
And if you get jumped? He’s arranging a rumble and dragging in the Shepard gang to back him up
He’d walk you everywhere, and I mean everywhere
If you think he’s leaving your side for even a second, you’ve got another thing coming 
He’s got an arm around your waist, your shoulders, his hand in your back pocket and if anyone so much as talks to you, he’s standing behind you, glaring them down
He’s defending you in a heartbeat, no matter who the person is that's giving you grief 
Needless to say, nobody messes with Dallas Winston’s girl, and he’s willing to let everyone know just that 
Steve Randle
Much like Dallas, Steve is asking for names almost instantly 
He will not hesitate to fight someone for you
He gets so defensive on your behalf and will become insanely protective over you
If someone has said or done something to you that really bothered you, he’s comforting you and going after the person in a heartbeat
You’re his number one priority and he wants you to be happy at all times 
You think he’s leaving your side? Nope, no chance
He’s gonna be one step behind you at all times and if he catches anyone giving you problems, they’re in for a rough time 
I’m telling you, he’s shooting everyone dirty ass looks 
If someone so much as says “hello” to you, Steve will be coming up behind you 
“this person giving you trouble, babe?” 
He’s just looking out for you 
Two-bit Mathews - 
The second you tell Two-but you’re being picked on, he’s smothering you with love
He’s not letting you go at all 
He doesn’t want anyone making you think you’re worth less than you are 
Secretly, he’s super pissed that someone would even think to mess with you and if he sees them, he won’t hesitate to confront them 
He’s taking you everywhere you need to go, no complaints <3 
If you get jumped, he will not hesitate to help fix you up before tracking down whoever hurt you
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𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲 𝐨����𝐞𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐬!!
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dappermouth · 1 year
Note
How are the prints of your art so freaking beautiful? I have three of your 24x36 prints and they're the best looking pieces in my whole collection and I wish I could get my art (digital) to look half as good in a large print but I just can't figure it out. Is there some special trick to it or just your own brand of magic? Love you and your work <33
Oh thank you! I do have some tips!
If you're looking to get crispness at scale, I think the most important factor is the size of your art. I work on big canvases, at least 8000px on the shortest side. This requires your computer to be haunted by a powerful ghost, but painting at that scale results in a finished file that you can print at large sizes (posters, wall tapestries, etc) and it'll look fantastic. As a rule of thumb, figure out the largest dimensions you want to print at before you start painting, and set up your canvas to that size at 300dpi.
Select paper stock with your artwork in mind — matte and semi-matte papers are much preferred for darker art like mine. And possibly for all art, all the time. Brightly colored art can work on glossy paper but idk, I don't like glossy prints in general. Too shiny? I feel like a bird would come grab it out of my hand? on reflection this may be a personal problem
If you're making prints at home, look suspiciously at your printer while it prints. Keep it self-conscious, keep it on its A-game. Don't let it pull one over on you.
I hope that's helpful somehow! There's a ton of other stuff but I'm already rambling. A lot of it is still mysterious to me also, don't be discouraged if it takes some trial and error!
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localkiss · 2 months
Text
Screaming for attention!
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manipulative brothers best friend re4!leon kennedy x fem!reader
cw: DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT!! Mentions of past grooming by leon, age gap(~8 yrs), manipulation, guilt, dirty talk, p in v, afab reader, noncon creampie, slight anal/talks of anal, codependency, slapping, daddy kink, pet names, depressed thoughts in the beginning, chubby/thicker reader, manhandling, praise kink, degradation kink, talks of pregnancy (just a bit), oral (f receiving), virginity talk, controlling leon, obsessed leon, slight size kink if u squint!
note: hhh... read the warning lol before you comment. I was going to put more of leon being so fucking weird but erm, decided not to. not proof read btw!! but i do want to say i am a victim of SA and i used to heavily think about him and wished that he went further. lol idc what people say, i still struggle thinking like that, but ik it's wrong. so yes that's what this fic is loosely based on -_-
wc: 3.1k! tags: @rigorwhoring, @argreion, @xoxostarlet, @fairry1 bc I love u all :33!
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Maybe it's for the best. No more surprises. This is nothing new. All you can hear is deafening silence, swallowing you up in a warm cocoon, suffocating you like a million years of guilt and thousands of weights on your throat and chest. 
You can't help but wish he had done more. Maybe he would've if he could see your thoughts. Maybe he would've stayed.
But those sleeping pills really did a number on your body. You tried to overdose on everything you could, even your antidepressants. Yeah, it was dumb. But it was all just killing you from the inside anyway. 
All you can do now is just sob violently into your pillows. Claw at the sheets and at your scalp, so pathetically. No wonder he chose you. So fucking easy to manipulate, to knead into someone he can use. No wonder he said he only loved you like a friend after he finally got caught in the act.
Whatever it was that he said, you can't remember exactly. You just tuned him out. White noise oozing into your eardrums like water does when you stand underneath the showerhead. He didn't apologize. Didn't explain. Didn't even try to. All you did was cry and plead for him to stay. 
"Please don't leave me, Leon. Please, I can't live without you! I love you! Please!" You sobbed into the phone because, yeah, he broke up with you over text. It's not like you guys were even in a relationship. The age gap was too big and illegal to even be considered a real relationship. 
You knew he was so much older than you. Liked it. Knew it was wrong, yet went forward with it. He should've stopped it. Should've. But he didn't, though. 
You still love him deep down in your heart. He was your first love. First 'boyfriend'. First person to grope your body. You asked for a kiss, and he pressed his chapped lips against your forehead. He asked you for ass pictures, and you gladly sent them. Giggling happily whenever he complimented you and your body.
He's still your ideal type. A cuddly, tall, muscular brunette. 
You wish you could stop yourself from comparing every guy to him or hoping they won't end up like him. Using you and throwing you away as soon as they got what they wanted. 
But, now that you're legal, he reached out to you. Said some nonsense to try and get back into your heart. You didn't even care what he said. Just wanted to feel alive, to feel loved, and to be loved again. Even if it meant being loved by your abuser, you would let him drag you through hell and back if it meant he would love you like he did in the past. If it meant you could feel happy, free, and weightless again, you would march into hell with him.  
As messed up as you are, you would do anything to make him stay. So that you can feel full again. Happy again.
"Wish you would've taken all of my firsts," you pouted as he pulled away from your lips. Swollen and red, so pretty.  
Leon grinned and raised an eyebrow at your statement. "Really, baby girl? Damn," he bites on his lower lip, and his thumb brushes across the apples of your cheeks. 
Taking in the way you look different but still the same as you were years ago, just a bit fuller in your hips, thighs, and stomach, he remembers when he gripped your thigh with both of his hands. Couldn't even manage to grab ahold of all of the fat. A few inches away from completely grabbing your thigh with both hands. 
Now, he probably couldn't even make it so that there were a few inches between his hands; it would be a bit of a distance. That's how much you've grown width-wise. Length wise, you haven't really grown much. 
"Yeah, daddy," you preen under his attention, shifting your weight from your heels to your toes, and back down flat on the floor. "I mean it." 
He lets out a soft chuckle, and his calloused hands softly grab onto your shoulders, rubbing small circles into the fabric of your shirt. "Wish I could've taken all of your first too, baby. I know I would've made it all special for you. For my special girl." Leon coos, his head dipping down to lick into your mouth.
Hot spit trickles down the back of your throat and onto your chin. Making you squeeze your doughy thighs together, moaning as his hands squeeze down to your ass. Pressing you up against his built body. His hard-on throbbing against the confines of his skinny jeans, onto your soft, pudgy tummy.
He groans as you tug at the hair on the back of his head. Pulling back and squishing your cheeks together, and then tapping your face as you try to press your lips on his. His blue eyes darken as you moan when his hand makes contact with your face. 
"Fuck," he grips onto your chin, forcing your mouth open to let a wad of spit hit the edge of your tongue, letting it slide down into your tummy. "Daddy knew you'd like that. I've got a slutty little princess, huh?" 
It's a rhetorical question, but you answer with a few quick nods.
"Yeah, daddy, I'm your slutty little princess." Always so quick to repeat what he said. What he drilled into your brain years ago obviously holds up. You still want to make him happy, even if he ruined you for anyone else. Ruined you for life.
The corners of his lips quirk upwards, his hands giving your ass a quick squeeze before he pushes you down into the bed. He climbs on top of you like a hungry animal, licking his lips at the sight of his prey.
A whine escapes from your throat at the sight. He's gotten even more attractive and bigger, and it's making your brain all mushy. Shooting directly down to your core, feeling it gush out slick onto the gussets of your panties. 
You lick your lips and wrap your legs around his hips. "Please, Leon." 
He lets out a low growl, his veiny forearms coming up by the sides of your head. Firmly planting them on the mattress as he rocks his hips into yours. His bangs fall into your face as he teasingly grazes his lips against yours. Panting hotly against your lips. 
"Relax, baby," is all he says before he moves his mouth, making a wet trail from the corner of your lips down to your jawline. 
"Let me love you." Leon murmurs into your skin as he sucks a hickey underneath your ear, making you gasp and squirm beneath him. 
You become pliable, easy to bend, and easy to please. Brain too foggy to clearly think straight. Leon's marking up your neck like you'll try to run away from him. It's like you're his property now. God, you've always been his, ever since that fateful day, right?
Just a few words, and he can do whatever he wants with your body. Maybe one day you'll let him take your first time with your other hole. Who knows. 
"So pretty, fuck," his tongue dips between the valley of your breasts, hands grasping at your shirt to push it up, exposing you to his hungry eyes. His knee slots between your thighs, making you squeak and squeeze his leg involuntarily. Pressing your tits together to swipe his tongue across your perky nipples. 
Bathing your tits in his spit, he suckles on them like a madman. Enjoying the way you mewl and gasp, using his teeth to draw out more noises from you. Obsessed with every single part of you, even the not-so-pretty parts. He has you mapped out in his mind, his sweet, supple princess. 
"Has anyone ever eaten you out?" Kissing your areolas, soothing the small bite marks he left. He looks up at you through his eyelashes, brows furrowed in concentration. He's doting on you like it's the last time he'll ever see you again. 
"No," you say, pressing your lips together in a flat line. Feeling your stomach tighten up with butterflies and hints of nausea. 
Leon likes that. So much so that he smiles into your stomach, softly gnawing on the pudge around your belly button, earning some soft squeals and pats to try and push him away. He wants to make you crumble under him, submit to him, and never leave. Never want another man. Always comparing someone to him, wishing they did it like him. He wants to plague your mind and control you from the inside out. 
He wants to tie you up in his bedroom and never let you leave. Live your own life? No. Leon wants to drill it into your brain and body that he owns you, no thoughts about anything else but him and his body. 
He pulls down your shorts and panties in one go, watching the string of your arousal stick to the gussets of your panties. His large hands pry open your legs, pushing them up to your chest and holding them down with his weight. 
"Remember this," he spits onto your pussy, watching it swim down to your holes. Squeezing your legs when you squirm a little too much for his taste, deciding to spit once more to make sure you'll have his DNA in you for the next couple of days. 
Pressing chaste kisses on your clit because he knows it'll make your mind go all fuzzy and only think of Leon, Leon, Leon. And how good he's making you feel. Nobody else but him.
He dips his tongue between your folds and begins to languidly make out with it. Thrusting his tongue and swirling it upwards as his upper lip continues to make contact with your clit. Drawing out all sorts of pathetically cute noises from you. 
Wishing he was recording this so he could show it to his friends and brag about how he has molded you to be his perfect girl. You're not a woman until he fucks a baby into you. 
"You like that?" He suckles on your clit and gently bites down on it. Watching the way your face crinkles up and how you squeeze your eyes shut. Everything you do amuses him. 
"Daddy, mmh... god, yes!" You grasp the sheets as you feel a warm, fuzzy feeling in your lower abdomen. Toes curling as Leon fucks his tongue into your drippy hole. 
He shakes his head, pressing his nose into your sensitive bundle of nerves, trying to get you to cum quickly. 
Your hands desperately try to reach for Leon for comfort as you stumble into an orgasm. "Daddy... Mmphh—fuck!" 
Legs kicking out and vibrating as he coaxes you through your orgasm. Slowly swiping his tongue through your folds to slurp up all of your cum, he presses soft kisses all around your pussy. "Such a good girl," he sighs. 
Leon spreads your legs, kissing his way up to your face. He licks his way into your mouth, forcing you to taste yourself on his tongue and gulp down some of his saliva. "So easy." He puts his hand on your neck, lightly applying pressure as he goes back in for more kisses. Make sure you never leave this cloudy state of mind, so he can do whatever he pleases with you. 
"Maybe I can even eat you out here," he says, letting his hand wander down to your asshole and lightly tracing the rim of it. Feeling you tense up brings a sly smile to his face. "No? Okay. Maybe next time." He chuckles and pulls back to unbuckle his jeans. 
Slowly undoing his belt and putting it next to you on the bed. Unzipping his fly as he makes direct eye contact with you the entire time. He makes you gulp nervously as he finally pushes his jeans down his muscular thighs.
Your eyes immediately jump to his hard-on. How does he even keep that thing in there? It's begging to be freed, and quite frankly, you want to run away out of nerves, not believing his cock can even fit inside of you! What the fuck did Leon even eat for it to even have grown that big and thick?
Leon sees the cogwheels turning in your head as he steps out of his pants. With each step he takes, it bounces against the slightly stained, striped fabric. "Baby, don't be so nervous. It'll be alright." His voice is soothing and convincing, almost hypnotic in the way it makes your body buzz and your mind go blank. 
It is a bit terrifying to think about the effect he honestly has on you, your mind, body, and soul. 
"Are you on the pill?" He asks, although he already knows the answer. 
"No, I'm not." You mumble shyly. Embarrassed to not be on some sort of birth control.
Leon reaches down for his wallet and pulls out a condom. "Good thing I always come prepared, huh?" Chuckles as he pulls down his briefs, stepping out of them as he tears open the condom packaging. He slipped it on his drippy and flushed tip, sliding all the way down to the base. 
Slowly kneeling on the bed to lead his dick to your hole. Sliding through your folds to gather more fluids to make the first push easier on you. 
"Ready?" He grunts as he teases you by tapping himself on your swollen clit. 
"Uhuh, 'm ready," you whine as he slowly eases himself into your pussy. 
Moaning as you helplessly flutter and tighten around his shaft. Watching your face carefully as you scrunch and tense up. Stopping halfway and grabbing ahold of your hand, his other one grips the fat of your hip so tight it'll leave a bruise the next day. 
"Almost there, baby girl, doing so well for me," he presses a soft kiss to your forehead as he drives more of himself deep inside of you.
You look down at your stomach and tighten around him as you notice the bulge from his cock being so big and deep inside of you. His tip is brushing against the opening of your womb.
"Nnh, Leon, too big," you gasp as he rolls his hips against yours. Legs squeezing against his waist as he slowly starts to thrust shallowly.
"Baby, relax. Can barely pull out of you," Leon rasps in your ear, sending chills down your spine as you try to force yourself to relax around him. 
"Mnmph, sorry, Daddy. Please—" you pout, squeezing his hand tightly. Trying to signal for him to start pounding your needy cunt already.
He nibbles on your earlobe, slowly shifting his hips to thrust in and out of you properly. Soft plap, plap, plap, of his body hitting yours, making sure that he hits your g-spot. 
You swallow a whine as he lets go of your hip to lazily rub his thumb on your swollen little button. Hearing the way your breath hitches and seeing the slight curve in your spine makes all his administrations worth it. Slowly speeding up his movements as he squeezes your hand, groaning low in his throat when you clench around him tightly like a vice. 
"Tight cunt all f'me," he thrusts harder and harder, making it difficult to keep quiet. Soft punched-out cries leave your lips alongside Daddy, Daddy, Daddy's. "Fuck, daddy's gonna make you cum so hard around his cock, might even make you scream." 
Leon slowly pushes your legs up, putting you into a mating press as he drives himself deeper into you. Fucking into your womb, which craves his thick cum. Ecstatic with the idea of 'accidentally' slipping the condom off and cumming deep in your womb. Get you pregnant and finally be his woman. 
"God, wanna get you pregnant so bad, baby," he pants, bangs falling into your face with each harsh thrust. "Would take care of you and the baby. Mmhh shit—would suck the milk outta your fat leaky tits." 
Drools into your mouth as he kisses you with fervor, teeth clashing as his dick continues to fill up your sloppy pussy. 
"Leon, please, 'm so close," you hiccup as he vigorously rubs your clit in tight circles. Your legs brush up against his head as you feel that familiar warm coil in your stomach. 
"Cum for me princess." Leon's eyes darken; pupil's swallowing up his iris as he watches you unfold before him. Because of him. 
Your body tenses up and convulses with each swipe of his thumb on your sensitive nerves. Letting out a silent scream, your eyes close tightly as you try to hold onto Leon as best as you can, feeling his hot breath on your kissed, swollen lips. His fat cock is hitting all the right spots, almost painfully good as he fucks you deeply. Constantly pressing up against your womb, making your toes curl. 
Slowly rutting through your orgasm, he feels his own start to creep up on him. "Fuck, hold on, baby. Gonna pull out for a sec," he pants, pulls out of your heat, and discreetly pulls off the condom, letting it fall on his jeans. 
He quickly puts it back in before you can notice, giving you a spine-chilling smile. Giving you a few pecks on your lips and on your forehead as he uses you like a fleshlight now. 
Letting out soft whimpers and moans, he puts his head on your shoulder. The sounds of sex are his favorite sounds. Your crying is his favorite sound in the entire world. Nothing can top you crying out for him while moaning like a total slut. 
"So fucking hot, Jesus Christ," he groans, hips rabbiting into your pussy. Your insides are so warm and so wet, he feels like it's the first time he's going raw ever. Orgasm on the fence with each thrust. That and you're making all these noises, it's hard for him to concentrate on not cumming so fast. 
"G'nna cum, babe, holy fuck—" He lifts his head off of your shoulder and kisses you feverishly, spitting deep into your throat. Putting his forehead on yours, his nose touches yours as he grunts, pumping his cum into your pussy. Sticky white ropes straight into your womb. 
Panting and whimpering as his cock slowly ruts into your messy cunt. "Fuck... So good," he chuckles lightheartedly. 
Your pussy quivers around his shaft as it softens up. It feels so hot and sticky, and your mind is too fuzzy to even process that he came inside. A dumbfounded smile plastered on your flushed pink face makes his heart swell up. 
"Such a good girl. My good girl, right?" Leon nuzzles his nose against yours. Driving the fact that you'll always be his. Even if you move across the country, he'll always follow. Always in your shadow. 
"Uhuh," you respond shyly, giggling at the affection he's giving you. His eyes soften up, and you take in his face. The light stubble, small acne scars, and the way his hair is fading from dirty blonde to brown. "always, daddy." 
367 notes · View notes
transmascaraa · 4 months
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🥞 I woke up this morning with this idea
imagine Gaming with a reader who smiles very rarely, too rarely 🥞
bf!gaming headcannons!
he finally decided to confront you about it, and tried to help you...
bf!gaming x gn!reader
author's note: well i hope you had a great morning because I LOVE THIS IDEA. i really hope you like it cuz i genuinely think it's a great idea💗 thanks for requesting, have a good day anon, i hope the reader smiles reading this, especially if you're like the reader<3
"see? i told you i could make you smile..."
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-you rarely ever smiled
-in fact, too rarely
-and your boyfriend had noticed it, but didn't want to push you about it, he didn't want to make you feel as if you were forced to smile
-so he made a bet with himself
-he can make you smile.
-well, easier said than done, simply.
-but he'll try.
-he'll do his best.
-he can do it.
-you were sitting on the couch, reading some boring fantasy book.
-and he sat next to you, putting his hand on yours.
-"hey, my love... take a break, will you? for me? i want to... ask you something." he asked, eyes deeply looking into yours.
-"oh, okay. sure." you place a bookmark on page 147, closed it, and put it on the table.
-"okay... so..." he started fidgeting with his fingers, looking down at the floor.
-"what was your question?" you reminded him, taking a sip from the glass of water that was on the table.
-he slowly looked back up, straight into your eyes.
-he can do this.
-"so... basically... you know how you like- never smile?" he asked, frowning a bit.
-"what do you mean "never"? i do smile. it's just... very rare. i just... don't. it takes too much effort... smiling." you answered him, neutral expression on your face.
-he sighed.
-how could he help?
-well, he has an idea that might work.
-"can i... try to make you smile? because... i'm concerned about you..." he said worriedly.
-"do your best." you replied, taking another sip of water before turning towards him fully.
-"thank you." and just like that, he put his hands on your cheeks.
-"you're adorable, y'know that?" he started.
-nothing.
-"i wish i could see you smile again, yeah?" he continued.
-nothing again.
-"you're really cute, has anyone ever told you that? especially when you smile?" he's not giving up.
-still nothing...
-it made you happy to hear that, yes, but you just... didn't smile.
-"i love you more than anything, okay, little lion?" he tilted his head, but the frown never left his face.
-you didn't move an inch.
-he's not losing hope yet.
-then, he thought about something...
-"are you ticklish?" he bluntly asked, the frown finally leaving his face.
-"uhm... i guess?..." you answered, a bit embarrassed...
-you saw his smile.
-his hopeful smile.
-suddenly, he started tickling you.
-everywhere.
-your belly, your neck, your waist, everywhere.
-you were laughing.
-truly.
-the two of you ended up having a tickling battle, not stopping for a second, until gaming stopped first.
-you were smiling at him.
-he was smiling so brightly back at you.
-"i love you, smiley face." he said.
-"i love you too, idiot..." you said, rolling your eyes.
-but you couldn't stop the smile on your face.
-he made you smile, even if it meant for one day, he did it.
-he did it.
~~~~~
i hope this is what you wanted anon<33
i hope you liked it nonetheless tho🫶
i loved the request and just the idea of it all is just so adorable i swear
306 notes · View notes
koiir · 24 days
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SWEETEST LOVER
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Blue lock boys who are the BEST lovers ( I’m bias) Relationships with them { not proofread }
ᡣ𐭩 •。ꪆৎ ˚⋅ Chigiri, hiori, reo, isagi, kurona
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CHIGIRI H.
Chigiri is the definition of “best friend and partner” he’s rather open to you (having known for years) and also being the person who’s the best boyfriend you can could ask for.
The advice he gives is one of harsh criticism yet the most truthful, many would be surprised by how blunt he can be with you although it shows in how he cares and truly only wants the best for you. If opening your eyes with a hard truth will help then he will take that route.
Although of course, he isn’t heartless. He comforts you with a warm smile, heart beating at how attentive he becomes with you. Giving you the princess treatment one would die for. He knows comfort can differ in various ways, so he will always try and communicate on what you need.
I feel as though chigiri struggles with communication concerning his wants, so he tries to grow in order to be the best version of himself he can give you. Yet there will be moments where this can “problem” can arise and he will always realize his faults.
Other than that, his knack for his wellbeing swells into you as well. Hair is rather important for the guy, so when he comes to you with a grin about a new hair secret, expect a days worth of hair care. The two of you are seen as rather “gossipers” yet you two just find anything and everything interesting. Really, anything with chigiri can turn into an interesting conversation. Thus making him an amazing boyfriend and best friend in one<33 ( I could go on about him but I’ll save that for later)
HIORI Y.
SO UNDERRATED I LUV HIORI. Ugh he’s the sweetest I mean cmonnn…
With his already calm and polite demeanor, falling in love with him is that of a warm spring that flourishes into a bond greater than words can say.
A quick learner, can easily pick up your moods and will give it his all for you! Very much a giver and will cherish whatever you give him, hiori becomes emotional seeing how much you give to him, already viewing your love the best thing he could every ask for.
From his childhood, he was told he was loved, although feeling it would come and go. Yet when you come into the picture, it’s as if he experiences the feeling of being loved for the first time ever. His past one of hallow that now with you, it beams with hope and joy, making him the more doting on you with showing how much he truly cherishes what you have given to him.
The type of guy who would let you drag him anywhere, as his face is filled with adoration for you, soft smile evident as he lets your body take the lead as he follows you to no end. Out and about, would definitely rub your wrist gently before crossing the street whispering a faint “be careful” that causes your heart to race in seconds.
Can’t forgot how he would definitely, want you to game with him. Even if you don’t he finds a way for you to be near or engage with him. Whether that be you seated next to him or him lying across you, the peace hiori has in being close to you is infinite. A safe space he never wishes to let go of.
Seems squishy (don’t ask)
ISAGI Y.
GREEN FLAG I REPEAT ULTIMATE GREEN FLAG. Might be bias but cmon it’s isagi
The boyfriend who literally will do ANYTHING you wish for (as long as it’s reasonable ofc) Follows you around like a lovesick puppy as he comments on places he thinks you would like or you two should go to. Will love to get stuff where it compliments the other, almost as if something that matches.
He once asked you what you were going to wear and showed up with a similar color combo, mind you he bought you two the same shoes for days where you want to match.
The kind of guy who will hold eye contact whenever you talk, even if you can’t hold it with him because of how intense his gaze is. He will continue looking at you as id you’re all he can stare at. How can someone make you flustered without anything at all?? That’s isagi for you
Isagi is someone you admire, someone you learn from even as you two grow in the relationship. His kind heart giving you the courage to try new things as he supports you all the way, words of encouragement making a hue of light shine in your life.
Overall, a loving caring guy who always has your back and a cutie
BACHIRA M.
Bachira just like anyone has his…quirks. Although nothing severe to the point of destruction or hurting you. If anything he’s the most loyal and treats you with such care, fearing that one day you might perish or realize he’s not so called normal.
His insecurities one that you know from the beginning, tending the wounds he has held from years of the past. His reluctance to thank you with the best he can give you, his affection and loyalty to you one of scarce of losing you. He can’t fathom this, you with him. Together. So it’s only natural he wishes to show you what others cannot see.
There’s never a dull moment with him, his vibrant persona melting into you as you intoxicate in the newfound confidence he gives you. Bachira is the type to move you out of your comfort zone, making a break to see you in a new light that he’s lucky enough to see and be the cause for.
His affection spreads throughout every aspect, in public he resembles a dog that clings onto its owner that holds eyes filled with adoration.
His warm hands allowing for yours to bask in his warmth, feeling more as he squeezes yours and grins from ear to ear viewing your flushed expression. “There’s that face I adore oh so much!”
Eyes wander to your figure as bachira sees the shiver in your figure, cold winds swirling around causing you to feel the cold sensation of the winds. His embrace eternal, fitting like a puzzle as he snuggles up behind you swaying your bodies side to side. The norm would be teasing words, yet for now he embraces the delight with you in his arms.
Ah bachira
KURONA R.
Cutest boy I mean cmon he has shark teeth
No matter the time being, kurona can’t fathom that you’re truly his, his mornings being filled with a lovesick smile at the thought of you.
His teeth hold many stories, the most memorable being how insecure he is because of them, smile showing less due to this fact. But the day you tell him to smile, hands on his cheeks as you gaze into his eyes, the crack in his lips breaking as he smiles at you softly.
It’s only natural for kurona to want to be the reasons for your smiles, indulging in what will make your smile come to fruition so he can also gift you with his smile.
His adoration for sharks weaves into you, no matter what he makes a correlation between you. Expect matching trinkets of any shark related item. Plushies that greet you in a pair that hold eachother, his lips spilling the words of “look, it’s us”
What may come to a surprise is his ability to make you swoon with his words, maybe not directly, but on paper. The reassurance kurona needs is spilled onto messages late at night, showing his vulnerability on text because he cannot bear with how you might respond. He knows you would comfort him, although he knows his heart will experience speed to limits unknown.
So when morning dew comes and you wake up with his messages, your heart grows fond seeing just how much the boy wants you to know, his heart is all yours and he wishes to hold it for the eternity to come.
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a/n; MONTHSS of not posting anything…prob cause I’m almost out of school and have inspo
edit; guys I’m sorry reo wasn’t added my ass was just tired after writing for bachira😞
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whorekneecentral · 8 months
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merry smutmas series
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hi besties!! since I'm skipping out on kinktober this year, I figured I wouldn’t be fair for me to leave you guys without some sort of holiday treat so here we go again. 
I won’t be able to fit everyone into this series cause with would have taken me forever so between classes and other fics, I’ve been working on this since august lmao. I hope y’all enjoy these as much as I enjoyed writing it &lt;33 // massive thank you to @oconso for the banners and to @themandaloriansdiaries for all the help plotting and for listening to my complaining <3
running from: November 1st to December 31st - every Tuesday, Thursday and on the weekends
tagged under: merry smutmas xoxo 
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November 1st: Sebastian Vettel - Sticky Fingers 
Your husband spends his first Christmas at home since his retirement and he went a little.. a lot over board. 
November 4th: Trent Alexander Arnold - As Red As My Stockings 
Trent’s crush on the pretty physio is well known amongst the players. They make sure to help him fulfil one last Christmas wish before you all head home for the holidays.
November 5th: Pato O’Ward - Snow Storms 
Your boyfriend insists the roads are fine to drive despite the massive incoming snow storm; as someone who grew up in cold weather, you knew better. yet, there you were stuck on the side of the road with him in the snow. 
November 7th: Ruben Dias - Miss Me, Miss Me
Your brother holds his annual Christmas party and you’re forced to spend the afternoon with the one person you had been avoiding all season but tis’ the season you guess. (stones!reader)
November 9th: Pierre Gasly - Cocoa
You have your boyfriend drive all around the city until you find the one thing you were looking for. When you finally find it, you decide you want something else. 
November 11th: Ben Chilwell - Snowflakes On The Glass 
Ben insists on having a snowball fight when he wakes up to the massive snowfall but you want nothing more than to stay in bed. 
November 12th: Kimi Raikkonen - Only The Best For You 
Kimi spends the holidays with his old friends. He doesn’t forget you; bringing you exactly what you had been wishing for and you make sure to thank him.. properly. (dad’s best friend!kimi) 
November 14th: Lucas Paquetá - Spin Me Around 
Lucas busts out the champagne and the streamers to celebrate the new years in your new place. 
November 16th: Yuki Tsunoda - Sous Chef 
Yuki finds himself more fascinated by the woman cooking than the food on his plate for once. (chef!reader) 
November 18th: Erling Haaland - Christmas On The Farm 
Erling takes you home to spend the holidays at the Haaland Family Farm and you two end up being the only ones there. 
November 19th: Lance Stroll - Old Friends 
Lance gets an invitation to an old teammate’s place to ring in the new year but he finds himself too distracted by someone in particular to care about the ball dropping (vettel!reader)
November 21st: Jude Bellingham - Ugliest Sweater Wins
Jude is invited to Luka’s Christmas party, an ugly Christmas sweater party to be exact. It took a bit of convincing but you got him to go. 
November 23rd: Daniel Ricciardo - The Flash Of The Camera 
You enlist Daniel to help you with your Christmas gift for him. 
November 25th: John Stones - Black Out 
Your boyfriend blows a fuse with the Christmas lights and you’re stuck in the dark, but you find a way to make the best of it. 
November 26th: Fernando Alonso - Your Pick 
Fernando enlists the help of a certain someone to get his Christmas shopping done but the list is oddly familiar (pr officer!reader)  
November 28th: Kostas Tsimikas - The Smell Of The Holidays 
You over baked for your niece’s holiday bake sale so you do the neighbourly thing and share with your neighbour, Kostas and his two puppies.
November 30th: Toto Wolff - Winter Wonderland 
Your husband skips out on Christmas every year due to work but this year, he ends up in London. You make it your mission to introduce him to some holiday fun.
December 2nd: Christian Pulisic - Ho Ho Hoe
You find a pair of Christmas boxers in Christian’s drawers and decide to tease him about it. 
December 3rd: Mick Schumacher - Merry Ruff-mas 
Angie goes missing the day before Christmas and Mick finds her at the neighbouring ranch, wrapped up with ribbon and bows. 
December 5th: Jordan Henderson - Shivers
Jordan comes in after shovelling the driveway and keeps trying to love on you. You tell him that you can feel how cold he is but he makes sure to show you what cold really feels like. 
December 7th: Lewis Hamilton - Tis’ The Season 
An old friend finds his way to you front door and no matter how much you try to get rid of him, you can’t. 
December 9th: Dominik Szoboszlai - Come Home 
The two of you are separated over the holidays and you’re missing each other a little too much to keep this going. 
December 10th: Charles Leclerc - The Night Before Christmas 
A massive snow storm delays Charles’ flight home for the holidays and you both begin to give up hope but a Christmas miracle occurs.
December 12th: Virgil Van Dijk - Holiday Greetings 
You send your old friend a Christmas card every year and when he sees that a certain someone was no longer in the picture, he pays you a long overdue visit. 
December 14th: Mark Webber - A New Term 
You send your professor an email over the winter break and the man wonders why you’re still working, urging you to come out and relax like everyone else. (Professor!Webber) 
December 16th: Thiago Alcantara - Bubbles 
You find yourself aching from all the holiday prep and your husband being the good man that he was, makes sure you’re feeling okay after a long day. 
December 17th: Jenson Button - A Sandy Christmas 
Jenson takes you on a dream vacation over the holidays but still makes sure you’ve got a gift to open come Christmas morning. (Sugar Daddy!Jenson) 
December 19th: Kylian Mbappe - Family’s Growing 
Kylian finds himself swooning over how good you are with his niece and nephew, the thought of having a family with you spins around his head. 
December 21st: Carlos Sainz Jr - Traditions 
Coming back from Christmas with your family, the two of you return to Spain to celebrate new years with his family and all their traditions. 
December 23rd: Andy Robertson - Mistletoe Means Kisses 
The overpowering smell of mistletoe hits you when you walk into he house, your husband came up with his own plan while you were out. 
December 24th: George Russell - A New Tradition 
You and George spend your first Christmas together and you mash together the traditions from both of your families. 
December 26th: Jack Grealish - Always Around 
A wild new years night out leaves you bumping the same person over and over again. 
December 28th: Esteban Ocon - The Gift Of Giving 
Esteban takes a liking to the barista that works at the cafe near his place. He finally works up the courage to ask her out in time for the holidays. 
December 30th: Sergio Ramos - Secret Santa 
The players and the staff play secret Santa every year; they write a letter, toss in a box and everyone picks. Sergio some how lands on the person he’s always had a soft spot for. 
December 31st: Max Verstappen - Time Is Running Out 
Max wasn’t one for resolutions but as the clock counts down the hours to new years, he finds himself running to resolve the biggest resolution on his list; you. 
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Note
Hii can you write az saying something he doesn't mean and making reader cry and then comforting her? Or the classic flinching during argument? I just really love hurt/comfort loll
Thank you and I hope you have a good day!! <33
OH I LOVE THESE TROPES! Your wish is my command!
Warnings: Cussing, Yelling, somebody almost getting stabbed.
Reckless
"You can't keep doing that shit y/n!" Azriel yells. "Well, what the fuck was I supposed to do Azriel? Just let them corner my older sisters?" You yell. You were supposed to only stay with Nest and Feyre while they were in the library, but you had risked your life, distracting them so Nesta and Feyre could go get help while you led the Hybern Intel down, down, down into the library, and that's when you had met your new best friend, Bryaxis(which is beside the point). Azriel was horrified to find out that you were down there, by yourself, with no one to protect you. But you were always like that. Doing reckless things with your new immortality.
"You were supposed to find a way out, y/n. You put yourself in these situations and it pisses me off!" He steps close to you wings flaring; eyes filled with icy rage. "You cannot keep being so fucking dumb and reckless!" He shouts.
You flinch at the insult, tears filling your eyes. "You whimper and a sob spills from your lips "I-I'm so sorry Azriel." Azriel's eyes widen. "No, no I'm sorry. I'm so sorry angel, I didn't-" He tries to pull you against his chest, but you shove him away. Azriel's heart breaks as he sees you sob, mentally kicking himself for hurting you.
"I was scared. So, so scared to lose you." He whispers. You look at him. "I didn't mean to say that you're dumb, y/n. You are so smart, the most beautiful fae I have ever seen. And the fact that I insulted you just now kills me. I am so sorry." He says. "It's fine." You whisper. "Now please come and hug me. I don't want to be apart anymore." Azriel nods and starts to walk over, but you rush over, impatient to be in his arms. He kisses the top of your head as he rocks you back and forth, sort of like a slow dance moment. "I love you Azriel." You say and look up at him, adoration filling your eyes. Azriel leans down to give you a sweet kiss. "I love you so much angel, you have no idea how long I've been waiting for you." He says. "Well, it's a good thing I came along!" You say cheerfully and kiss his cheek.
A/N: Okay! Three in one day! Y'all keep coming with the request, it's helping me be motivated and keep me out of the funk in my head. Keep requesting from the list, but also give me some other characters so I don't get bored and back into my procrastination mood. Love y'all, be safe!
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glearyyyne · 2 months
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deja vu
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Part 2
Synopsis: Since some things are precious but invisible to the eye, we forget them as life passes by. In which child Satoru forgot the promise he made to you as he grew up trying to fit into the expectations thrown at him, everything is fine until he began to dream about those moments he forgot, and he began to investigate what he forgot.
Word Count: 5,567 words
Warning: Imaginary friends, I don't know if this is angst anymore since it has a happy ending.
Note: Happy Birthday to me! (ᗒᗨᗕ) the title came from tomorrow x together's new song! go ahead and stream minisode 3. This is best to read while listening to deja vu! This was to be like long ass story but I'll just make a part 2 if everyone wants too. Have fun reading! <33.
_____________________________________________________________
Stomp stomp
Satoru stopped running when he made it to the garden of his household, he ran away again from his lesson just to have fun. 
As Satoru stood on the pile of leaves, he carefully stomped out the melody of the Morse code, hoping to summon the person he had met in the garden. Each rhythmic stomp carried a message, a secret code only they shared.
"Satoru!" The voice called out, and he excitedly turned his head around to see you and the fennec fox that you weirdly named "Tomorrow.”
Upon seeing you, Satoru’s eyes lit up before he tried to rush towards you but instead, he tripped and landed right on his face. 
He groans in pain with tears threatening to spill but you come towards him, kneeling and helping him to stand up.
He started seeing you after his 7th birthday. When he was wandering around alone in the garden that was like a maze, he saw you sitting prettily as you gently petted that fox. 
You looked just around his age at that time, but he couldn't believe whether you were real or not since you looked like an angel to his eyes from how bright you were. 
It was as if you were not a human being at all…
When you accidentally made eye contact with Satoru, that's how you two began to meet in secret.
"Are you okay?" you asked with a concerned look as Satoru brushed it off, telling you he was fine, even though there was clear evidence of blood running down his nose.
Despite his attempt to hide it, you could see the pain in his eyes. 
Gently, you reached out and wiped away the blood with a handkerchief you always carried with you. Satoru winced slightly but tried to hide it with a weak smile.
"You really should be more careful, Satoru," you scolded softly, your voice filled with worry. "Let's get you cleaned up."
You led him to a nearby bench and carefully dabbed at his nose with the handkerchief, trying to stop the bleeding. 
The fennec fox, Tomorrow, nuzzled against Satoru's leg as if offering comfort in its own way.
As you tend to him, Satoru couldn't help but feel a sense of warmth and safety wash over him. Being with you and Tomorrow always made him forget his troubles, even if just for a little while.
As Satoru sat there with you by his side, tending to his injury, he couldn't help but wish that this moment could last forever. 
He wished he could stay like this with you, with Tomorrow following you two around, offering silent companionship.
Despite the pain in his nose, Satoru felt a sense of peace and contentment wash over him. 
Being with you made him forget about the stresses and worries of his everyday life as the heir to the Gojo clan. It was moments like these that he cherished the most, moments of simple happiness and quiet friendship.
As you finished cleaning up his nose, Satoru looked up at you with gratitude in his eyes. "Thank you," he said softly, his voice filled with sincerity. 
"I don't know what I would do without you.” He added.
You gave him a light-hearted chuckle as you told him it's nothing, as long as his nose is fine. 
With a playful grin, you booped his nose gently, causing him to wince and whine as it still pained him even from a gentle touch.
"I'm sorry," you said with a sympathetic smile, realizing your mistake. "I didn't mean to make it hurt more."
Satoru shook his head, a small smile playing on his lips despite the discomfort. "It's okay," he assured you. "I'll survive."
You and Satoru shared a moment of laughter, finding solace in each other's company even in the midst of a small mishap. As Tomorrow nestled closer to both of you, the bond between the three of you felt stronger than ever.
As Satoru began to tell you about his day, you sat there listening attentively, giving him a genuine reaction to each detail he shared. 
You laughed at his humorous anecdotes, frowned at his frustrations, and smiled at his moments of joy.
Lost in conversation, neither of you noticed the passage of time or the maid beginning to appear in the garden. 
Satoru was completely engrossed in sharing his experiences with you, finding comfort in your presence and the ease with which he could confide in you.
While Satoru was still engrossed in telling his story, he was abruptly pulled on his wrist. Startled, he turned to face his personal maid, who had a frantic look on her face.
"Gojo-sama, who were you talking to?!" she asked, breathing heavily. 
Satoru was confused. "Huh? I was talking to-" He turned his head to face you and Tomorrow, eager to show you to the maid, but to his surprise, the two of you weren't there.
Huh?
Confusion clouded Satoru's expression as he scanned the garden, but there was no sign of you or Tomorrow. 
His heart sank as he realized that you and the fennec fox had vanished without a trace, leaving him standing there, alone with his bewildered maid.
The maid sighed in disappointment, her frustration evident as she scolded him. 
"I'm disappointed in you, Gojo-sama, for running away from your lecture and being here alone! How would your father react if he knew this?!" Her voice carried a mix of concern and fear, knowing the consequences of Satoru's actions if his father found out about his whereabouts while escaping an important lesson.
Satoru felt a pang of guilt as he realized the trouble he could be in if his father discovered his disobedience. 
He lowered his gaze, feeling ashamed for causing his maid such distress.
"I'm sorry," he murmured softly, his voice barely above a whisper. "I didn't mean to worry anyone. I'll go back to my lesson now."
With a heavy heart, Satoru followed his maid back to the house, his mind filled with thoughts of you and Tomorrow, wondering where you had disappeared and if he would ever see you again.
The next day, Satoru returned to the garden, finding himself standing in the same spot where he had met you before. Hesitant at first, he debated whether to do the Morse code to summon you, but he shook off his doubts and began stomping his feet in the pile of leaves, creating the familiar rhythm.
Just as he finished, he heard your voice calling out his name. Startled, Satoru turned around to see you standing there, nervous but with a glimmer of hope in your eyes. Tomorrow hung on your shoulder, adding to the surreal scene.
"Satoru," you spoke softly, the sound of his name sending a wave of relief through him. Without hesitation, he rushed towards you, a smile spreading across his face.
"You came back," he said, his voice filled with joy and gratitude. "I was afraid I wouldn't see you again.”
Satoru added, "Since you suddenly vanished yesterday when my maid was scolding me," his tone carrying a hint of hurt. You gently held his shoulder, trying to reassure him.
"I'm sorry about it, but if you know about it, I don't know about the consequences I'll face," you explained, your words tinged with concern. Satoru's interest was piqued by your cryptic statement, and he looked at you with curiosity.
"What do you mean?" he asked, his brows furrowing slightly. He couldn't help but wonder what consequences you were referring to and why you had disappeared so suddenly the day before.
You brushed it off, telling him it's nothing he should be worrying about. Satoru was confused as to why you couldn't tell him, but he kept quiet. All he wanted to do was spend time with you and Tomorrow, relishing in the moment of companionship and friendship.
Though a part of him was curious about the secrets you held, he decided not to press further. Instead, he focused on the present, cherishing the time he had with you and the fennec fox. As he watched Tomorrow playfully scampering around, a smile formed on Satoru's lips, grateful for the simple joys your presence brought him.
On his 10th birthday, Satoru came across the garden, but there was no joy in his body. He mechanically performed the usual Morse code, his heart heavy with burdens he couldn't quite articulate. When you called his name, he turned around to see you smiling at him, Tomorrow perched on your shoulder as usual.
However, your smile faltered as you sensed Satoru's unusual demeanor. Concern etched across your face as you approached him cautiously.
"Satoru, is everything alright?" you asked gently, your voice filled with genuine care. Satoru hesitated for a moment, unsure of how to express the turmoil he was feeling inside.
"I came here to tell you that I will stop coming here," Satoru replied, his voice tinged with sadness. Your face showed an expression of hurt and a small "oh" escaped your lips. Satoru scratched his nape nervously.
"Satoru, will you promise me?" you asked, your voice soft but filled with emotion.
"Promise about what?" he asked, confused by your request.
"Promise me that you will meet us again and you won't forget the Morse code we created and also mine and Tomorrow's name," you told him with a smile, even though it hurt you deeply.
Satoru thought it wasn't that hard as he agreed, "I promise," he said with a smile. You smiled back, though a tinge of sadness lingered in your eyes, as he walked away to head inside his clan household. You stood there, staring at the ground, hiding the fact that you had a gift for him hidden behind your feet.
As Satoru disappeared from view, you let out a sigh, feeling a mix of emotions swirling inside you. 
With a heavy heart, you bent down and retrieved the gift you had prepared for him, clutching it tightly in your hands.
Despite the pain of saying goodbye, you knew it was for the best. Holding onto the hope that someday, somehow, you and Satoru would meet again. 
With a determined smile, you tucked the gift away, silently vowing to cherish the memories you shared and to keep your promise to never forget.
But that promise slowly faded away as Satoru grew older, the memories of his childhood slipping through his fingers like grains of sand. 
Immersed in his duties as the heir of the Gojo clan, he became consumed by the weight of expectations and obligations.
As the years passed, the garden and the special moments he shared with you and Tomorrow became distant echoes in his mind, overshadowed by the demands of his position. 
Slowly but surely, the memories began to blur, the Morse code becoming nothing more than a forgotten melody, and your name fading into the depths of his consciousness.
Despite his best efforts to hold on, Satoru found himself unable to recall the promise he had made to you that day. 
It was as if a veil had been drawn over his past, shrouding it in a haze of forgetfulness.
With each passing day, the gap between Satoru's present and his cherished memories of the past widened, leaving him feeling lost and disconnected from the innocence and joy of his childhood. 
As he continued to fulfill his duties as the heir of the Gojo clan, the promise he had once made to never forget slipped further and further from his grasp, lost to the passage of time.
**
Satoru woke up abruptly, his breaths coming in ragged gasps. 
His hand instinctively went to his forehead, feeling the dampness of sweat, and then to his eyes, where he could still feel the lingering dampness of tears. 
He realized he had been crying in his sleep.
What the hell is that dream?
Confusion and unease settled over him as he tried to make sense of the emotions that had stirred within him. 
His heart felt heavy, weighed down by a sadness he couldn't quite place. Was it a dream that had brought him to tears, or was it something deeper, something he couldn't quite grasp?
As he lay there in the darkness, the remnants of his dream slipping away like smoke, Satoru couldn't shake the feeling of emptiness that lingered within him. 
Despite the warmth of his surroundings, he felt an inexplicable chill in his bones, as if something precious had been lost to him forever.
Satoru lay back again, his mind still lingering on the vivid dream. Who was that young girl in his dream? He swore he had never met them before. With a sigh, he glanced at his clock and realized he was awake earlier than usual. 
Feeling restless, Satoru got up and headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth. As he stood in front of the mirror, he couldn't shake the feeling of unease that had settled over him. The memory of the dream lingered in the back of his mind, elusive yet haunting. 
Despite his attempts to push it aside, Satoru found himself lost in thought, pondering the significance of the dream and the emotions it had stirred within him. 
He is itching to know that person.
But as he rinsed his mouth and splashed water on his face, he resolved to put it behind him and focus on the day ahead. With a determined expression, he left the bathroom, ready to face whatever challenges awaited him.
At Tokyo Metropolitan Curse Technical College, Shoko and Geto stared at Satoru as if they had seen a ghost. "You're early, wow," Shoko said, amused, while Geto remarked, "You look like shit, dude."
Satoru groaned at them for being annoying. "Knock it off, you two!" he told them frustratedly as he rubbed his forehead, already feeling a headache coming on.
Both Shoko and Geto sat down in front of him after grabbing chairs. "Was it some girl?" Geto asked teasingly.
"I'll punch you in the face," Satoru told him annoyingly, clearly not in the mood for their jokes.
Shoko giggled at the exchange. "So it is a girl!" she said happily, her eyes sparkling with mischief.
Satoru sighed heavily, covering his face with his arm at the desk in an attempt to ignore Shoko and Geto's antics. 
The two glanced at each other before shrugging and engaging in another conversation, leaving Satoru to his thoughts.
His mind began to wander, trying to unravel the mystery of the dream that had left him feeling unsettled. 
Did he really forget something? 
The thought gnawed at him, but his childhood memories were a blur, a part of his past that he often avoided digging into.
As Shoko and Geto's voices faded into the background, Satoru couldn't shake the feeling that there was something he was missing, something important that he had left behind in the depths of his memories. 
But as much as he tried to push the thought away, it lingered like a shadow, taunting him with its mysterious presence.
Even though it bugged Satoru, he continued his day like he usually did.
**
Satoru woke up in the middle of a field on a hill. Looking around, he found the surroundings peaceful, but confusion flooded his mind as he tried to comprehend how he had ended up there. Just as he was about to shout for someone, he heard a squeak.
His head swiftly turned to see a fox? But it didn't look like a normal fox; its color didn't match the foxes he knew. Perhaps it was a specific type of fox? 
He felt that this was the fox in his other dream.
The fox stared at him with an unreadable expression before turning around and running away down the mountain.
Satoru's eyes widened, and before he knew it, his feet unconsciously began to run, trying to chase after the mysterious fox.
As Satoru made it to the top of the hill where the fox had led him, he stared down to see someone's back facing him. They knelt in front of the fox, giving it a chin rub, to which the fox responded with evident happiness. 
Satoru was about to call out to the person, but to his horror, he found that his voice wouldn't come out. 
Panic surged through him as he tried to walk forward, only to find himself stumbling and falling through darkness. 
The sensation of falling seemed endless, and Satoru's mind raced with confusion and fear. 
What was happening? 
Where was he going? 
And who was that person with the fox? 
**
Satoru woke up again, this time to the sound of his alarm blaring. He sat up straight, turning off the alarm abruptly as he rubbed his eyes. 
The remnants of the dream lingered in his mind, leaving him feeling unsettled.
"Ah, my head," Satoru muttered, rubbing his temples in an attempt to alleviate the headache that had crept in. 
The vividness of the dream left him feeling disoriented as if it had a deeper significance that he couldn't quite grasp.
Satoru thought back to the person he had seen in his dream, trying to recall their features. He couldn't shake the feeling that the person was just around his age. 
Could it be that person and the fox were the ones from his dream?
Sighing, Satoru stood up and went about his usual routine, pushing the strange dream to the back of his mind for the time being. 
But the nagging feeling that there was something more to it lingered, leaving him unsettled as he went about his day.
**
Satoru called out to Shoko, who was smoking in the hallway. "Mhm?" she replied, blowing out a puff of smoke.
"Let me guess, did you and Suguru make another bet?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. Satoru shook his head, a serious expression on his face.
He leaned against the wall, contemplating his thoughts for a moment before speaking again. "What would you do if you had a dream that felt so real?" he asked, his voice tinged with uncertainty. 
Shoko took another drag of her cigarette before responding. 
"Well, I guess it depends on the dream. But if it felt real, I'd probably try to figure out why it felt that way. Dreams can sometimes be a reflection of our subconscious thoughts and feelings, you know?" she replied, her tone thoughtful.
"But all dreams are just made up?" Satoru asked, his brow furrowing in confusion.
Shoko shrugged, taking another puff of her cigarette. "Well, believe what you want. I already gave you my answer to that question of yours," she said cryptically, leaving Satoru to ponder her words.
Satoru tried to question her further, but Shoko began to feel annoyed. She rolled her eyes and sighed heavily, her patience wearing thin.
"Look, Satoru, I don't have time for your quarter-life crisis," she snapped, her irritation visible. "If you keep bothering me with these questions, I swear I'll kill you."
Despite her threatening tone, Shoko knew she wasn't strong enough to actually harm Satoru. 
It was more of an empty threat born out of frustration than anything else.
Satoru huffed in frustration as he walked away from Shoko, deciding to ask Geto the same question. 
However, his attempt didn't go as planned, as Geto's patience wore thin much quicker than expected.
As Satoru began to ask his question, Geto's annoyance boiled over, and he almost ended up getting beaten up by Geto for the umpteenth time for annoying him with his constant questions. 
Satoru quickly retreated, realizing that perhaps he needed to find the answers to his questions on his own.
**
Satoru woke up, finding himself back in his clan household's garden. 
It was a maze-like garden, designed to intrigue and challenge visitors. His eyes were drawn to a glowing circle, its color matching his own eyes. 
As it began to move inside the maze, Satoru felt a curious pull, compelling him to follow the mysterious object.
With cautious steps, he navigated through the intricate pathways of the maze, the hedges towering above him like walls of greenery. 
The glowing circle led him deeper into the maze, its light casting eerie shadows on the foliage.
Despite the uncertainty swirling in his mind, Satoru felt a sense of determination driving him forward. He had to find out what this glowing object was and why it had led him here. With each twist and turn of the maze, he moved closer to unraveling the mysteries hidden within.
As soon as Satoru took a turn in the maze, he slowed to a stop when he saw the same fox whining at the back of a glowing young girl. 
The girl was crying and digging into the ground, pushing something that resembled a letter. Satoru's interest was piqued by the unusual scene unfolding before him.
As the girl turned around, Satoru thought he would be able to see their face. 
However, instead of a clear view, their face seemed to glow, obscuring his vision and making it harder for him to see their features. 
They carried and hugged the fox tightly, tears streaming down her face, while the fox whined softly as if trying to comfort them in return.
A sense of empathy washed over Satoru as he watched the heartbreaking scene. He felt compelled to approach and offer his help, but he hesitated, unsure of how to intervene in such a mysterious and otherworldly situation.
Satoru's mouth unconsciously opened, but once again, his voice failed to emerge. His hand shot up to his neck, gripping it tightly in confusion. 
He felt a surge of panic as he wondered if he had suddenly become mute.
Frantically, Satoru tried to speak, but no sound escaped his lips. The realization that something strange was happening washed over him, leaving him feeling helpless.
The young girl stopped crying and stood up, still carrying the fox in her arms before suddenly running away. 
Satoru's eyes widened in surprise as he instinctively followed them, breaking into a run. However, he couldn't seem to move forward. 
Instead, he felt as if an invisible force was pulling him backward, preventing him from reaching the girl and the fox.
Confusion clouded Satoru's mind as he struggled against the unseen barrier, his heart pounding with frustration and urgency. But no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't break free. 
As he continued to struggle, his vision suddenly went dark.
**
Satoru woke up again, finding himself back in his dorm room. He sat up straight, blankly staring at the wall, lost in thought. Was this moment real or just another dream? 
To confirm, he pinched himself and winced as he felt the pain, concluding that he was not dreaming at this moment.
Sighing in relief, Satoru tried speaking and was reassured by the sound of his own voice. 
He got out of bed and headed to the bathroom. As he looked into the mirror, he winced at the sight of his reflection. 
His face appeared ruined from his messed-up sleeping schedule, with prominent bags under his eyes indicating how little sleep he had been getting. 
As Satoru brushed his teeth, the memory of the garden dream flooded his mind.
He paused, toothbrush in hand, trying to recall the details of the dream. The image of the young girl burying something in the ground lingered in his thoughts.
"Maybe what the young girl buried was real," Satoru mused aloud to himself. 
The idea took root in his mind, and he felt a sudden determination to find out the truth. Without hesitation, he made a decision.
"I should find out," he resolved, determination firm in his voice.
After brushing his teeth, Satoru quickly made up his mind to head back to his clan. He decided to ditch school in order to find the mystery of what the young girl had buried in the ground.
**
The maid spoke in a happy tone, "I'm so glad you came to visit, Gojo-sama," her voice filled with genuine warmth. She had been with Satoru during his childhood and had seen him grow up.
Satoru smiled back at her as they walked down the hallway together. "Well, I just had something to take care of here," he told her, keeping his purpose for returning to the clan grounds vague for now. 
He didn't want to raise any suspicions about his sudden visit. 
"You were just this small back then," the maid said, a fond smile on her face as she reminisced. She placed her hand on her waist, indicating Satoru's small height from his childhood days. 
"You always ran away during lecture time because you had to go to the garden all the time," she chuckled, the memory bringing amusement to her voice.
Satoru froze on his spot, his mind intrigued by her words. "W-what do you mean?" he asked, his voice itching to know the answer.
"I mean you always had these imaginary friends," the maid explained gently, her tone understanding. "We saw that coming since you were a child. Maybe it was because you didn't have any other kids to play with at the time."
“You were always intrigued by the fennec fox or even those morse codes that you always show me.” She added
Satoru's eyes widened as the memories slowly started to come back to him. 
The mention of the fennec fox and the morse code stirred something deep within him, unlocking fragments of his forgotten childhood.
"You should go ahead," Satoru told the maid, his mind consumed with the memories flooding back to him.
"But I thought you wanted to eat some food?" she asked, confused by his sudden change of plans.
"I just had to get something first from my room. I'll join later," Satoru reassured her, his tone urgent as he made his way towards his room.
The maid was about to protest, but before she could say anything, Satoru vanished, using his teleportation ability to make a quick escape. 
She sighed and shook her head, accustomed to his unpredictable behavior, before heading to the kitchen to carry on with her tasks.
Satoru appeared in front of the garden, his determination driving him forward. He focused on remembering the path, trying his best to recall every twist and turn. 
With each step, he made a conscious effort to scan the ground, searching for any signs of disturbance that might indicate something had been dug up.
As he navigated through the maze, Satoru kept an observation eye on his surroundings, his senses heightened with anticipation. 
Every corner turned, every dead end reached, brought him closer to uncovering the truth behind the mysterious events that had unfolded in his dreams.
Satoru found a patch of dirt with growing grass, noticing how oddly dented it appeared. 
Suspicion sparked in his mind, prompting him to dig into the soil using his bare hands.
"The gardener must not have noticed this. I guess they barely come to this part of the maze," Satoru muttered to himself as he continued to dig, determined to uncover whatever lay hidden beneath the surface.
Satoru's hand quickly grabbed the dirty paper, unfolding it with trembling fingers. His eyes widened in astonishment when he recognized the familiar handwriting—it was the letter he had made.
The realization sent a shiver down his spine as he struggled to comprehend how it had ended up buried in the garden. 
Dear Future Me,
Hi! I hope you're having a good day! Remember that time when we met [Reader's name] and Tomorrow in the garden? It was super cool! We made a secret code together, just for us!
If you ever forget it, don't worry! It's
 - --- -- --- .-. .-. --- .-- ! It's from Tomorrow, the fennec fox's name! Isn't that awesome?
I hope you always remember our fun times and our secret code, even when you're all grown up!
From,
Your 7-Year-Old Self! (⁠☆⁠▽⁠☆⁠)
Satoru's world seemed to come to a halt as he read the letter, flooded with memories of the day he had written it with you by his side. 
He remembered the joy of creating the secret code together, the excitement of writing the letter to his future self. It felt like a precious capsule of time, frozen in his memory forever.
[Reader’s name] and Tomorrow…
Quickly, he folded the paper and hid it inside his pocket, wanting to keep it safe and close to him. 
With a final glance at the spot where he had found the letter, Satoru carefully replaced the dirt, covering any trace of his discovery. 
As he made his way back, he felt a sense of urgency, not wanting the maid to worry about his absence.
After spending the day at the clan, Satoru returned to his dorm, feeling a sense of peace wash over him. 
As he prepared for bed, he made sure to take a moment to memorize the Morse code, repeating it over and over in his mind until it became second nature.
With the Morse code firmly ingrained in his memory, Satoru climbed into bed, ready to embrace whatever dreams may come. 
As he drifted off to sleep, he held onto the hope that he would find answers and perhaps even more memories waiting for him in the realm of dreams.
**
Satoru woke up on the hill, greeted by the sight of the fall season around him. 
He scanned his surroundings, hoping to catch a glimpse of Tomorrow and you, but they were nowhere to be found. Determined, he searched for a pile of leaves, his heart pounding with anticipation.
When he finally found one, he took a deep breath, steeling himself for what lay ahead. 
With steady determination, he began to stomp his feet onto the leaves, creating the sound of the morse code echoing through the quiet air.
With each rhythmic beat, Satoru felt nervous while hoping this morse code still worked. 
He continued the morse code, trusting that somehow, it would lead him to see you again.
After Satoru finished the code, he waited anxiously for the familiar voice to call out to him, but seconds turned into minutes, and there was only silence.
Disappointment weighed heavy in his heart as he stared up at the sky, feeling a sense of hopelessness wash over him.
Just when he was about to give up, he felt a gentle nudge at his ankle. 
Startled, he looked down to see the fennec fox, Tomorrow, rubbing its head against him, squealing and smiling in its own unique way.
"Tomorrow," Satoru whispered, his eyes widening in disbelief and wonder. In that moment, a spark of hope ignited within him once more.
Satoru was about to kneel and pet Tomorrow when he heard someone call out to the fennec fox. 
Tomorrow's ears perked up, and with a joyful squeal, it darted toward the person, leaving Satoru momentarily stunned.
Turning quickly, Satoru's eyes widened as he saw you, someone he had been longing to see again, standing before him. 
You knelt down and held out your hand, welcoming Tomorrow as it leaped onto your arm and perched on your shoulder, just like old times.
As you turned your gaze towards Satoru, your eyes slowly widened in surprise. "Satoru," you said, your voice filled with astonishment.
"You still-" Satoru began, but you cut him off.
"What took you so long?" you asked him. 
Satoru was surprised by your words. "You still remember me?" he asked incredulously, pointing to himself.
"Of course. I've never stopped waiting for you," you replied with a smile, your eyes filled with warmth and sincerity. 
Tomorrow whined softly, and you chuckled, giving the fennec fox a gentle chin rub as if you understood its whines.
"I mean, we never stopped waiting for you," you corrected yourself, including Tomorrow in your response to ensure they weren't left out.
Satoru couldn't help but unconsciously smile at the sight of you two together. He observed the both of you for a moment, taking in the changes since the last time he had seen you. 
You looked more mature now, but still carried that familiar warmth in your eyes. Tomorrow remained the same playful fox, bringing a sense of familiarity and comfort to the moment.
"I'm sorry if I forgot our promise. You can punch me all you want," Satoru said, spreading his arms wide, and preparing himself for the certain punch he’ll face. 
However, instead of a punch, he was taken aback as you stepped forward and enveloped him in a warm hug.
Tomorrow, sensing the affection, jumped down from your shoulder and rubbed its head against Satoru's ankle, offering its own form of comfort and forgiveness. 
In that embrace, Satoru felt a wave of gratitude and relief wash over him, knowing that despite his forgetfulness, the bond between you all remained strong.
"What matters right now is that you're here," you told him, your voice soft and filled with warmth as you continued to hold him in the embrace. 
Satoru felt a sense of peace wash over him as he slowly wrapped his arms around your back, returning the hug with equal sincerity.
"I won't forget you. Ever. I really promise," Satoru whispered, his words sincere and heartfelt, leaving you giggling softly in response. 
At that moment, surrounded by the presence of each other and the playful affection of Tomorrow, Satoru felt a sense of reassurance that some bonds were truly unbreakable, no matter the passage of time.
He might just not want to wake up anymore.
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radiantteacup · 11 months
Note
Hi omg I absolutely NEED Tighnari using his vision in bed like omggg. Like using vines to tie you up or smith like that omg I saw this request somewhere else so I hope you don’t mind me using it too <3 u ofc don’t have to do it, but I just wanna say I LOVE your writing style <33
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𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐘 𝐎𝐅 𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐄!
✧.* misuse of vision, vaginal penetration, unprotected sex, bondage with vines, hickies, fingering, climaxing, over stim? dirty talk
༊*·˚ Tighnari wants to get freaky using his vision. <3
˗ˏˋFeaturing ´ˎ˗ Tighnari
˗ˏˋA/n ´ˎ˗ Thank you I appreciate you sm! This is such a good idea! He has the perfect vision for this! I really hope you like this, it ended up way longer than I initially thought it would be lol. <3
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Tighnari would probably be hesitant to use his vision on you at first. He's not so bold as to lie and say he's never imagined it before, having you all tied up and vulnerable for him, but he still finds the thought rather..perverted.
Convincing him doesn't take much effort however, a few kisses to his neck as you whisper how hot it would be in his ear will do, really.
And when he's admiring the way the thick green vines spread apart your plump thighs, with your wrists restrained above your head, he can't help but wish he'd done this sooner.
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You can't help the way your face grows hot as his lidded eyes stare at your exposed body. Sure, you suggested this, practically jumped his bones just to convince him, but this is still embarrassing.
"'Nari c'mon, stop staring a'me."
You whined, putting on your best pout when his eyes flicker up to your face. When your eyes meet his own you can feel your breath leave your chest, suddenly feeling small under his almost predatory gaze.
Silence permeates the room for a few second, tension building thickly as he stares you.
Then, wordlessly, he crawls onto the bed in front of you. His hands slide across the expanse of your thick thighs, however his eyes are focused on the gem hidden between them.
You whine again, desperately wanting more with no way to get it. Your back is pressed against the headboard of the bed, your wrists bound above your head, and your legs pinned to either side of the bed. You're completely bare before him, a fact you're now all too aware of.
This position is precarious for many reasons, someone walking in on the two of you is really just the tip of the iceberg, but perhaps that's part of the fun. The erotic risk and secure trust held behind the play.
You feel him lean in, his nude chest pressing against your own. The feeling of him beginning to nip down your throat makes you shudder, something that only eggs him on.
You feel his calloused hands slide beneath your thighs, pulling them to rest on top of his own. Then he slots his lithe body against yours, allowing you to feel the way his heavy cock presses against your cunt.
You moan quietly, the thick tip of his cock pressing against your needy hole.
Tighnari is still nipping his way across your exposed neck and shoulders, leaving dozens of marks, licking over each new bruise as he goes when you feel his hand slip between your bodies. You barely register the feeling of his touch before he's slipping two well-manicured fingers into your hot cunt.
His pace is fast, intense, as he pries you open to prepare you for his fat cock. You can't help but moan as jolts of acute pleasure shoot through your pliant body. And you almost cum when his skilled thumb begins rubbing tight circles on your clit, making you throw your head back at the overwhelming pleasure.
You tug at your leafy restraints, nails digging into the green flesh as your brain begs you to cling to Tighnari when you cum.
" 'Nari, 'Nari please! M'gonna cum-fuck, please!"
Your body jerks as you come undone on his talented fingers, thighs twitching when he pulls away, slipping his fingers into his mouth to lick off your sweet essence.
You whimper at the sight, drool slipping from the edge of your plump lips as you try to recompose yourself for what's to come.
You can feel the way your stomach flips when he licks his plump lips before he leans back into you. You can see his vision glow from where it lays on the dresser beside his bed, then you're being flipped around, your chest is now pressed into a pillow below you, your wrists bound together in front of your face. Your legs are held apart by vines that cling to you by your ankles, keeping you vulnerable for the horny man behind you.
"Fuck baby, you look so damn good like this."
So pretty when you're weak and defenseless against him. The thought alone has pre-cum dripping from his pretty pink tip.
You whine, peeking over your shoulder to try to see him, and boy is it a sight to see; his fluffy ears are pressed to his head, his face bright red, and his eyes, fuck his eyes, they're half-lidded and watery, filled with a ravenous hunger.
When he notices your awe-struck face staring at him, he lets out an embarrassed growl, his palm pressing into the back of your head, pressing your face into the pillow beneath you.
Unable to restrain himself any further, he presses his body against your own, further pining you into the mattress as he pushes his thick cock into your inviting little pussy, the intense warmth leaving him panting against your spine.
"Fuck baby-your so fuckin' tight f'me."
You whine, lashes fluttering as your body works to accommodate the welcome intrusion.
"Nari, you're so fuckin' big."
You feel your breath catch in your throat when he starts to gently thrust into your gummy cunt. Tears stinging your waterline as your fingers cling to the green vines the keep you restrained.
The feeling of you clenching around him leaves him throwing all caution to the wind, beginning to ram his fat cock into you at an intense pace.
"Haa! Fuck- so good!"
Your eyes roll to the back of your skull as the loud sound of skin slapping and your moans fills his hut. You can hear the way he begins to forget himself, whiney groans and grunts slipping from between his slightly chapped lips.
His nails dig into the fat of your hips, finding purchase in your soft skin as he rails you from behind. He almost loses his mind when he sees the thick ring of your cream wound around the base of his cock, his own eyes rolling back.
Your climax hits you like a freight train, sending you spiraling in the intense pleasure. You feel two of Tighnari's fingers slip into your mouth, pressing down on your tongue in an attempt to quiet some of your louder moans, you're still in the forest after all, however he doesn't last much longer than you.
You can feel his nose press into your spine as thick ropes of his hot cum fill you up. You moan, the feeling grounding you back in reality.
However, before you can really come back to your senses, you can feel the vines shifting, bending you into a different position for the green-haired man.
He was insatiable now, and you knew you'd be in for a long night.
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winterrrnight · 10 months
Note
congratulations on 100! i love your works and i’m very excited for your future ones 💘
could i please get a before the coffee gets cold; rafe with number 11?
ahhh thank you sooo much!! <33 you've been so supportive throughout it all and that just means the whole world to me 🫶🏻🫶🏻 this fic, it's so different than what I usually write, so it's definitely experimental. I'm nervous about what kind of feedback it will receive, so I really hope you like this!
I can't get enough
PAIRING: soft!rafe cameron x gn!reader
SUMMARY: Rafe simply cannot get enough of you.
WARNINGS: intimate moments between reader and Rafe, but they aren't written with a sexual intent, fluff (kinda tooth rotting fluff 🫢)
EDITH SPEAKS: this is either very well written and one of my best, or it's so cringey and horrible that all it's traces should be removed from the internet. which one do you think this is 😃
PROMPTS REQUESTED: "I know I've kissed you like, 10 times, but just like another 10, please."
100 followers celebration (now closed) || navigation
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The moonlight shines in through the curtains, cascading a sliver glow throughout the entire room. You're lying on the bed with Rafe sitting in your lap, as he leans in to press kisses against your lips. For a moment, his lips linger on yours for more than just a few seconds, and you feel his heavy breathing mixing with yours, your limbs entangled with his.
You gently pull back and hold his face in your hands, softly brushing his hair out of his eyes. He closes his eyes at your warm touch, just feeling your hands trace his skin.
Rafe holds one of your hands in his and presses a kiss to your palm, slowly kissing up your arm and reaching your shoulder. You giggle when you feel his hair tickle your cheeks. He now reaches where he had started: your lips.
With swollen lips and a heavy heart, you pull Rafe back from you. He looks at you with a pout.
"What?" You giggle at his cute expression.
"I just want to keep on kissing you right now, you just look so kiss-able," he says softly. You gently intertwine your hand with his, your gaze never leaving his.
"I don't think that's a word," you mumble, your other hand moving to his hair and your fingers instantly twirling the strands of his silky hair.
"Let me just. . ." he whispers, attaching his lips back to yours and you smile into the kiss, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him closer. You take in the taste of the apple pie he had just less than an hour ago, his own sweet taste mixing with that of the pie to create a symphony of a sugary mess.
When you both feel yourself running out of breathe, Rafe pulls back again and just looks at you. Your hand now rests against his waist, and with a gentle push, you help him get off your lap. He lays next to you, and you instantly lay your head on top of his chest, your fingers tracing shapes onto his bare skin.
Even in this silence, Rafe's lips just cannot leave your skin. He's pressing butterfly kisses to your forehead and cheeks constantly, whispering little sweet nothings to you with each kiss.
"You're my everything, you know that right?"
"I cannot think of living a life without you."
"You and me, forever and always."
"I love you so much, I'll do anything for you."
You let your eyes flutter shut as you feel heat rush to your cheeks on hearing these words. His relaxed voice creates a calm aura around you, all your body muscles relaxing immediately.
You look at him to see him already looking at you, a gentle smile on his lips.
"I know I've kissed you like, 10 times, but just like another 10, please," he says, his hand resting against your cheek. You press a kiss to his bare chest and shift yourself in his lap.
"I think you've kissed me a lot more than just 10 times," you giggle, "but yes, kiss me some more. Please." His lips are pulled in the biggest grin and it doesn't even take him a second to pull you so close to him, his arms wrapped tightly around you as he wishes to never let you go.
↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-
TAGLIST: @runningfrom2am @ragingsammie @maybankslover @totalswag @madelynie @chenslucy @ietss @elle-mp3 @viawritesstuff
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hanniluvi · 11 months
Text
LOVING YOU FROM A DISTANCE — HEE FIC.
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“one day, i will stop falling in love with you…”
S ☆ — Heeseung has liked you for ages, too long for him to even recall how. Sure, he should be confessing now, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t, especially if you have a boyfriend. So how is he going to tell you his feelings in only a span of a year before he leaves?
2 LOVERS? — best-friend!heeseung x best-friend!fem!reader
GENRE — high school au, bsfs to lovers to ???, he fell first, she fell harder (+ sort of right person, wrong time), angst, fluff
WARNINGS — brief mentions of insecurities (abt looks, way they act, etc), some people may be shitty …
FEATURING — beomgyu from txt, sunghoon from enhypen
WORD COUNT — 18K+ (18379)
SOPH — giving angst another try 🙏 and with lyfad being the one with the most votes on that poll, this is the fic you guys chose! you let me know if you chose the correct one 😊 (sona don’t speak u dont count u lyfad HATER 🤬🤬🤬) . also i looped the playlist i linked when writing so you know the playlist really hit 😜 anyways i hope you enjoy <33 !
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ONE.
You looked at him, your gaze filled with admiration for Heeseung’s abilities. He had remained seated, skillfully plucking the guitar strings and producing a soft chord. As he glanced up, he smiled upon seeing your awestruck expression. You couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride for having such a talented best friend.
Whether it was academics, sports, or any other endeavor he pursued, he seemed to effortlessly excel in everything he did. His dedication and determination were inspiring, as he never settled for mediocrity. Being around him sparked motivation within you, urging you to push your limits and strive for greatness.
"Dang, you're good. I never knew you could play!" you exclaimed as he finished playing the guitar.
Heeseung smiled and put the guitar down beside him. "You know me; I'm always good at everything, but I don't mean to boast," he said. “You really don't know your best friend, do you?"
"Seriously, you're good at everything. It's hard to keep up with you," you joked, thinking about all the skills he possessed. "I wish I could play like you."
"It's not that difficult to learn. You're a quick learner," he reassured.
Eagerly, you suggested, "Could you teach me?"
"Sure, why not?" he agreed with a smile.
Excited about the opportunity to learn from Heeseung, you both decided to take some time for a quick guitar lesson. You sat right beside him, preparing to learn a few tips.
"Alright, let's start with the basics," Heeseung said, holding the guitar and showing you how to hold it properly. He hands you his guitar, allowing you to copy what he does.
You watched attentively, eager to learn everything you could. "Like this?" you asked, mimicking his hand position.
“Exactly, just position that slightly a bit more towards this way,” he scoots closer to you, propping the item correctly in your hand. “You’re doing great!”
"Now, let's learn how to strum the strings." He demonstrated a gentle strumming motion. "Try it yourself." He hands you the pick, watching over you as you try it out.
You nervously held the guitar and attempted to replicate his strumming. The sound was a bit off, but you kept trying.
Heeseung smiled reassuringly. "You’re doing great! Perfect for a first timer."
He patiently taught you the chords, giving you the encouragement and guidance that you needed. Even if you fumbled a bit, you gradually started improving the sounds. "Wow, that sounds much better now!" you exclaimed, surprised by your progress.
Heeseung chuckled. "See? You're a fast learner. Just keep practicing, and you'll be playing like a pro in no time."
"I just have to teach you a few more basic chords before I can teach you a song," Heeseung said, reaching over to take the guitar from your hands. However, before he could proceed, the door swung open, revealing Beomgyu. He greeted you both with a warm smile.
"You know," Beomgyu chimed in cheerfully, "if you really wanted to learn guitar, you should've asked me." He plopped down beside you, extending a hand towards Heeseung. "Hand me that guitar, Hee."
You exchanged surprised glances, amazed by the unexpected turn of events. Handing the guitar over to Beomgyu, you watched as he effortlessly adjusted his posture and strummed a few chords.
"I've been playing for a while now," Beomgyu continued, "and I'd love to share what I've learned with you."
"You know how to play guitar too?" you asked Beomgyu in surprise.
"Of course I do. Your boyfriend knows a thing or two," Beomgyu replied cheesily, earning a giggle from you. As the playful banter continued, Heeseung couldn't help but feel a twinge of discomfort, sensing himself becoming the third wheel. However, it wasn't an entirely unfamiliar situation.
Gradually distancing himself from the two of you, Heeseung settled into a corner, observing your interaction. He wore a gentle smile, occasionally chuckling at your playful mistakes and Beomgyu's teasing scolds.
In that moment, Heeseung couldn't deny the bittersweet longing within him. He wished he could be more than just your best friend; he wished for something more.
In the corner, Heeseung's heart felt conflicted as he watched your interaction with Beomgyu. Part of him wished he could be the one making you laugh and sharing those playful moments together. He couldn't help but wonder what it would be like if he were the one holding the guitar, strumming strings that would make your heart skip a beat.
He tried shaking the thoughts away, just as he easily did when he first found out you and Beomgyu were dating. But it was getting more difficult to accept it, rather than easily moving on as he should. Even if he’s happy for you, deep down, there’s still that silent hope that one day the stars will align and you will see him in a different light. But until then, he continued to cherish every moment spent with you, treasuring the friendship that was the foundation of it all.
And so, with a mixture of emotions, Heeseung chose to stay in that corner, watching over you and Beomgyu, silently wishing for your happiness, even if it meant his own heart had to endure a subtle ache in the process.
What else could he possibly do?
All he knows is that he must finally share something he's been keeping inside for a while. He knows he has to do it soon, before it becomes too late, even if the odds aren't in his favor. And he needs to know when it is the right time to do so.
TWO.
"Man, can you believe it's our final year already?" You exclaim, intertwining your arm with Beomgyu's as Heeseung quietly trails behind.
"I know, right? We've made so many unforgettable memories here," Beomgyu replies, his hair tousled by the wind.
"Definitely. This school will always hold a special place in our hearts," you say, noticing Heeseung's lack of response. "Come on, Heeseung, don't lag behind like that." You pause, grabbing his arm and pulling him closer to you. Heeseung cracks a smile, now walking beside you as you keep your hand on his arm, ensuring he doesn't get left behind.
Heeseung can't help but notice that if you continue to act this way, it becomes increasingly difficult for him to let go of his feelings for you. Instead of feeling numb or unaffected, he experiences a strange, growing sensation in his gut that intensifies with each passing day. Every little gesture or interaction from you brings a blush to his cheeks, causing his face to turn pink. As much as he wishes and wants to keep feeling these things, he can’t enjoy them for too long. All because of your relationship with Beomgyu, his other best friend.
Trios often come with their own set of complications, and deep down, Heeseung silently disagrees with the idea of it working out for you three. Being in a trio, especially when two friends are in a romantic relationship, usually leaves the third person feeling like an outsider. However, you and Beomgyu are unaware of Heeseung's hidden feelings. Heeseung was adept at concealing his true feelings.
Heeseung can vividly recall the day when Beomgyu asked you out and witnessed the joy that lit up your face upon accepting. He saw the radiant smile you directed towards Beomgyu, and in that moment, Heeseung had no choice but to smile back, despite the confusion and mixed emotions swirling within him.
He wondered why he couldn't be the one to bring that smile to your face, just like Beomgyu did effortlessly. Ever since that day, Heeseung has been pretending to be genuinely happy for you and Beomgyu, even though it weighs heavily on his conscience.
Heeseung carries a sense of guilt for pretending to be a supportive friend. Deep down, he yearns for something more, but he also grapples with the realization that his desires may never be fulfilled.
As time went on, Heeseung couldn't shake the feeling that he and Beomgyu were growing apart, and he believed that you were the cause of their distance. In his eyes, you became a huge barrier, separating him from Beomgyu. The bond they once shared seemed to weaken, overshadowed by the presence of your relationship.
Heeseung was convinced that Beomgyu knew of his crush on you. He remembers Beomgyu's comments whenever he gets caught looking at you with adoring eyes or speaking more softly when you are around. However, Heeseung had consistently denied any romantic feelings to Beomgyu, perhaps leading Beomgyu to pursue a relationship with you. Heeseung couldn't help but wonder if things would have been different if he hadn't denied his true emotions.
Heeseung wondered if it was his fault for giving up his chance. Perhaps he had been too hesitant, fearing the potential consequences of confessing his feelings to a longtime best friend. Heeseung couldn't deny that, if it were you, he would gladly accept his confession in an instant. However, he remained uncertain about your response. The fear of rejection and the possibility of jeopardizing the bond you shared kept him hesitant and apprehensive.
It was definitely his fault—at least that’s what Heeseung thought.
"Bye, Gyu!" you called out before heading off to your first period. Thankfully, Heeseung shared most of his classes with you, which he was grateful for.
"Bye, cutie!" Beomgyu playfully messed up his hair and quickly darted away before you could yell at him. It made Heeseung feel a bit uncomfortable, as he found it gross, but if he were the one saying those words to you, it would be a different story.
Heeseung knew he should try to suppress these feelings, but it was easier said than done.
"Come on, Heeseung, let's grab seats near the window." You pulled him along by the sleeve, leading him into the classroom. He couldn't help but smile at your enthusiasm, allowing you to take the lead.
How could he simply stop falling for you?
"Why don't we sit there?" Heeseung suggested, pointing to the two desks at the back of the classroom. You glanced around, noticing they were the only available seats left.
"It's a bit far," you remarked, but nonetheless, you walked over to the desks with Heeseung.
"Don't worry; if we take any notes, you can always look at mine," Heeseung reassured you with a smile.
As you settled into your seats, Heeseung pulled out his notebook and pen, ready for the class to begin.
"I hope it's an interesting class today," you said, glancing around the room.
Heeseung chuckled softly. "Well, I can’t say the same. With you by my side, any class becomes more enjoyable."
You laughed at Heeseung’s remark, giving him a glance. "You always know how to make me smile, Heeseung."
Heeseung's heart skipped a beat, but he quickly composed himself. "I'm glad to hear that. It's important to make each other happy, right?"
You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips. You playfully teased Heeseung, "Definitely. Geez, where did you learn these words from? Beomgyu?"
What a way to ruin the mood.
The mention of Beomgyu's name brought a slight pang to Heeseung's heart. It seemed like no matter the conversation, Beomgyu's name would always find its way into the mix. He couldn't help but wonder why it couldn't just be the two of you, free from the presence of his best friend. Was it wrong for him to feel a sense of dread whenever Beomgyu's name was mentioned?
"Nope," Heeseung replied with a forced smile, hoping to mask the feelings swirling within him. He didn't want to burden you with his internal struggles, especially when you seemed to be oblivious to any underlying tension.
You took his response at face value, assuming that everything was fine. Unaware of the mixed emotions he was suppressing, you continued to talk with him, leaving Heeseung to grapple with his unspoken feelings.
Heeseung knew deep down that he would forever be seen as just a friend in your eyes. Despite this painful realization, he couldn't bring himself to reveal the truth and risk losing the precious bond you both shared.
Each passing day, he endured the ache in his heart, all while putting on a facade of unwavering support and friendship. It was the least he could do for you to see you happy with Beomgyu. He didn't want to disrupt the harmony that existed between you and risk causing any rifts.
Even though it pained him with each passing day.
Is it bad to always wish for more?
THREE.
"Class is so boring," you whispered to Heeseung, unable to hide your lack of interest in the lecture. The monotony of the school routine had already set in, and it felt like another uneventful week.
"I know, right?" Heeseung replied, resting his head on his hand. He couldn't afford to let himself get too bored, knowing that you would probably ask him for notes once you snapped out of your drowsiness. He slid his notebook closer to you, diligently jotting down everything the teacher was saying.
"Thank you, Hee," you whispered, grateful for his assistance as you gazed absentmindedly out the window. You couldn't have asked for a better seatmate.
Heeseung hummed in response, stealing a glance at you and breaking into a warm smile.
Heeseung continued writing, his focus momentarily interrupted by the sensation of a cold marker tracing along his resting arm. He glanced over to find you grinning mischievously and drawing random doodles on his skin.
A soft chuckle escaped his lips as he pointed at one of the drawings. "What the hell is that?" he teased, referring to the lopsided smiley face you had sketched. You joined in his laughter, defending your artistic skills.
"Hey, don't judge my smiley faces! You were moving too much, so it ended up like that!" You playfully protested, pretending to be offended by his critique.
"Sure, sure. I could definitely do better. Give me the marker," Heeseung teased, reaching out to take the marker from you.
"No way!" you exclaimed, pulling it away from his reach. "Oh, come on! Let me show you my superior doodling skills," he pleaded, a mischievous glint in his eyes.
You playfully shook your head, resisting his attempts to snatch the marker from your grasp. "Sorry, but I don't think the world is ready for your 'superior' doodling skills," you teased, a smirk dancing on your lips.
Heeseung feigned a hurt expression, dramatically clutching his chest. "Ouch, that hurts! My artistic abilities are being underestimated here," he replied, mock offense evident in his tone.
You laughed, enjoying the playful banter between the two of you. It was moments like these that made you appreciate Heeseung's presence even more. He always knew how to bring a smile to your face, even in the midst of a dull classroom.
"Here, let me give it a try," Heeseung insisted, determined to draw something special. You relented, finally surrendering the marker to his hands. He gently took hold of your wrist, bringing your arm closer to him, and focused on creating the perfect smiley face.
As he meticulously crafted the drawing, his brows furrowed in concentration. However, despite his efforts, the smiley face seemed to take on a similar drooped appearance to the one you had drawn on him earlier. Heeseung's disappointment was evident on his face.
"Look—" he began to say, but you quickly interjected with a laugh, not letting him finish. You found it amusing that the smiley face turned out nearly identical to yours.
"See! I told you, it's the same for everyone!" you exclaimed, chuckling at the matching doodle he had created on your arm.
"It might be the marker's fault," Heeseung suggested, trying to find an explanation.
"Fault or not, at least we have these adorable matching doodles now," you replied, a warm smile gracing your lips. You moved your arm closer to his, comparing the two smiley faces side by side.
“They’re actually pretty cute,” Heeseung said with a smile, his eyes reflecting genuine warmth. He couldn’t help but find the simplicity of the smiley-face drawings charming.
"They definitely are," you agreed, admiring the simple yet endearing drawings. For a brief moment, it felt like there was nothing else in the world except the two of you, sharing a genuine connection.
“Oh right—Beomgyu’s basketball game is next week; are you coming?” You asked as the question finally popped into your head.
There was a basketball game already. Heeseung frowned, quickly regaining composure, so you didn’t notice. He didn't want you to notice the twinge of disappointment he felt deep inside. In that instant, Heeseung couldn't help but be reminded of the unspoken truth between you.
No matter how much he cared for you, Beomgyu would always hold a special place in your heart as your boyfriend. Heeseung, on the other hand, would forever remain in the background, a loyal friend with unrequited feelings.
He had grown accustomed to being the one in the background, supporting you both silently. But in moments like these, the contrast between his hidden feelings and the reality of your relationship with Beomgyu became more apparent, casting a shadow over his heart. It was a reminder that no matter how much he wished for something more, he would always be the one left behind, watching from afar.
As much as he wanted to be happy for Beomgyu and support your relationship, it was hard not to feel a tinge of sadness and longing. But Heeseung knew he had to hide those emotions to preserve the friendship that meant so much to him.
With a sigh, Heeseung forced a smile and added, "I'm sure it'll be a great game. I'll be there to cheer Beomgyu on." Deep down, however, he couldn't help but wish for a different outcome, knowing it was a distant dream.
You nodded, sensing a shift in Heeseung's demeanor, but you didn't press any further. It seemed like your words passed through him, as if he were lost in his own thoughts. The sound of the bell ringing didn't even register for him, further emphasizing his distant state of mind.
Concern crossed your face as you gently touched his arm, trying to bring him back to the present. "Heeseung, are you okay? You seem a bit off today."
He blinked, refocusing his attention on you, and mustered a small smile. "Yeah, sorry about that. I just got lost in my thoughts. I'm fine, really."
Though his words reassured you, a lingering worry remained. It was unlike Heeseung to be so absent-minded. As you both gathered your belongings and prepared to leave the classroom, you couldn't shake the feeling that something was bothering him—something he wasn't willing to share just yet.
"Let's meet at our usual spot, alright? I'm sure Gyu's already waiting," you said, getting ready to leave the classroom while Heeseung was still packing up.
Of course he'd be waiting.
"Yeah, see you guys later," Heeseung replied, attempting to sound cheerful, which elicited a faint smile from you.
Putting away his pencil case, Heeseung glanced at the oddly drawn smiley face and the random doodles you had playfully sketched on him. It brought a genuine smile to his face. However, as he let out a heavy sigh, he gathered his belongings and exited the classroom, making his way towards the usual meeting spot.
In his heart, Heeseung held onto the hope that his sincere smiles and friendly gestures would be enough to conceal his true feelings, at least for the time being. As he walked towards the rendezvous point, a bittersweet smile lingered on his lips. He knew he could still bring a small measure of happiness to your life, even if it couldn't be in the way he longed for.
Yes, he could do that, he reassured himself, even though deep down he couldn't help but wonder how long he could keep up the facade.
He shouldn’t have any trouble doing so, right?
FOUR.
It was the day. The day for Beomgyu’s basketball game, the one you’ve been worried about. Heeseung doesn’t understand why your boyfriend was a good player anyway.
“You think I should make a sign?” you asked, seeking Heeseung’s opinion.
“Depends on how big it’s going to be,” he replied, maintaining his nonchalant demeanor.
“I don’t know, maybe just like a small banner that says, ‘BEOMGYU ACE!’ It has a nice ring to it, don’t you think so?” You said, already excitedly planning how you would like to decorate it.
Hearing you use the term “Ace” for others always felt a bit weird to him. He’d listen to it very often now when you went to compliment Beomgyu. He couldn’t help but reminisce about the times you’d called him that—a little joke between you two. But it seemed like things had changed, and he had to accept it.
Although the word “Ace” seems to suit him better. You should’ve just made a sign for him instead, but he couldn’t bring himself to voice that desire. How would he do that anyway?
You didn’t know the slight wince that crossed Heeseung’s face as his back was turned towards you. He forced a small smile when he turned around, focusing on being a supportive friend.
“Yeah, I think that would be nice,” Heeseung finally said, breaking the brief silence. “I’m sure he’d love it.”
Heeseung would’ve liked it. A lot.
So there he was, listening attentively and giving you suggestions on how to decorate it. After all, it was Beomgyu’s important day, and you two had to do something to support him.
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When you two arrived, the excitement was noticeable in the air. Heeseung found himself amidst a sea of people, sitting on the bleachers with you.
“I’m already nervous,” You say to Heeseung, not being able to shake off the feeling. You weren’t playing; Beomgyu was, but you couldn’t help it.
“I’m sure Beomgyu will do great; he always has,” Heeseung reassures you, grabbing the water bottle next to him. “Here, this might help you a bit.”
You took the water, taking anxious sips. Heeseung was right; Beomgyu was, without a doubt, a fantastic player. His basketball skills were undeniably impressive, and it was one of the qualities that initially drew you closer to him.
As the game was about to begin, the atmosphere in the gymnasium became charged with excitement. The sound of enthusiastic cheers and rhythmic clapping of hands filled the air. Heeseung and you stood up, joining the crowd in cheering for Beomgyu’s team.
When Beomgyu’s team made their entrance, you couldn’t contain your excitement. The radiant energy exuded by the team was palpable, and you eagerly searched for Beomgyu among his teammates. Your face lit up when your eyes locked with his, and you couldn't help but let out a squeal of delight. "Beomgyu!" you called out, your voice filled with admiration and support. He noticed you in the crowd and grinned, waving back at you with a mixture of pride and determination.
As Beomgyu's gaze met Heeseung's, a moment of acknowledgment passed between them. Beomgyu raised his hand and waved at Heeseung, a genuine smile gracing his face. Heeseung reciprocates the gesture, waving back with equal warmth, momentarily pushing aside his internal struggles.
As the referee blew the whistle and the game began, Beomgyu's determination was apparent in his every move. You could tell that Beomgyu was motivated to perform well in the game, not just for himself but also for you. The desire to impress and make you proud shone in his eyes as he prepared to take the court. It was evident that he wanted to demonstrate his skills and prove himself as a capable athlete, all while knowing that your eyes would be on him throughout the game.
Beomgyu's basketball skills were undeniably impressive, and it was one of the qualities that initially drew you toward him. His agility, precision, and finesse on the court were captivating to watch. You admired his dedication and natural talent, which made him stand out among his peers. It was no wonder that you were attracted to him, as his basketball prowess added to his overall appeal.
Heeseung, although standing beside you, couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions. He masked his true feelings with a supportive smile, even though inside, it hurt him to witness the connection between you and Beomgyu growing stronger. He couldn't deny the talent and effort Beomgyu put into the game, but a part of him longed for your attention to shift toward him.
Every now and then, Heeseung's eyes would unconsciously drift to you. He watched as you cheered, your voice filled with genuine enthusiasm. Your laughter and smiles were contagious, spreading joy to those around you. He couldn't help but feel a mix of happiness and sadness, knowing that he wasn't the one who could evoke those reactions from you.
Seeing you smile and cheer for your boyfriend, Heeseung couldn't help but feel a pang of longing deep within his chest. What was so different between him and Beomgyu? Is it because Beomgyu was more good-looking? Did he have the features that could make anyone fall for him and not him?
His thoughts were slowly eating him alive, as if they were gnawing on his skin. He quickly pushed those thoughts aside, reminding himself to focus on supporting his friends.
As the game reached its climax, Beomgyu's team secured a victory, and the crowd erupted into cheers and applause. Heeseung clapped enthusiastically, sharing in the jubilant atmosphere. He couldn't deny the pride he felt for his friend's achievement.
After the game, filled with excitement, you and Heeseung approached Beomgyu. The elation on your faces was palpable, but unbeknownst to you, Heeseung was grappling with inner turmoil.
"You did amazing!" you exclaimed, extending your arms for a congratulatory hug from Beomgyu. He reciprocated with a wide smile, wrapping his arms around you and lifting you off the ground, twirling you in a moment of pure joy.
Your infectious laughter echoed through the air, enveloping the scene. It was as if Heeseung blended into the background, a side character of your happiness, while his own heartache intensified.
Heeseung mustered a smile, trying to suppress the gnawing emptiness he felt inside. Is it okay for him to feel this way?
“I saw your signs; they made me play even better today,” Beomgyu giggled. Heeseung smiled, glad it helped him, even if it did just a bit.
He congratulated Beomgyu once again, his words filled with genuine admiration despite the turmoil within him. Deep down, he wanted to be the one who could sweep you off your feet, revel in the joy of your laughter, and share those intimate moments with you.
"Let's eat out!" you suggested enthusiastically once Beomgyu put you down from the twirl.
"I would love to, but maybe next time? Coach told me there's going to be a team dinner, and I don't want to miss that," Beomgyu explained with a slight pout.
Weird. Heeseung found it weird. Beomgyu rarely attended team dinners, despite being the ace player. The coach would always have to persuade him to join. Nevertheless, Heeseung pushed the thought aside and chimed in, "Aw, well, next time then?"
Beomgyu nodded in agreement, causing your frown to fade as you understood his commitment. "Alright, Gyu, make sure you eat plenty, okay? I'll go home with Hee."
As you turned to leave, Heeseung caught a fleeting glimpse of an indiscernible expression on Beomgyu's face. It was a mix of emotions that left Heeseung questioning his own perception. Was he imagining things, or was there something more to Beomgyu's look?
Maybe he was too tired from that game.
FIVE.
As Beomgyu's schedule became increasingly packed with various commitments, Heeseung couldn't help but notice how you sought comfort and companionship from him. While he enjoyed being there for you, a twinge of insecurity crept into his thoughts; sometimes he wondered if he was just a backup when Beomgyu wasn't available. However, he considered you his priority, so he let go of those thoughts.
"You won't believe what Beomgyu did today!" you exclaimed, frustration evident in your voice. You plopped right next to him, making him take off his headphones.
Heeseung tilted his head, giving you his full attention. "What happened?"
"He completely forgot about our plans again," you sighed, exasperated. "We were supposed to go to the movies, but he got caught up with his friends and didn't even bother to let me know. I checked his story, and he’s having fun with them. It's like I'm not even a priority."
Heeseung frowned sympathetically. "I'm sorry to hear that. It must be really frustrating."
You nodded, grateful for his understanding. "Yeah, it is. I mean, I know he's busy, but it hurts when he constantly lets me down. Sometimes I feel like I'm just a second option."
And that’s what he feels whenever you hang out with Beomgyu. The feeling of being considered the second-best option for such a long time weighed heavily on him. He wondered if you could truly comprehend his perspective and the emotions he grappled with every day.
"I understand more than you know," he replied softly, his voice tinged with a hint of vulnerability. "Sometimes, it can be really tough feeling like you're not the first choice. But please remember, you're incredible, and anyone would be lucky to have you as their priority."
You’d definitely be lucky, but he wouldn’t be. He considered you his number one, but did you? Definitely not.
"You know, Heeseung, sometimes I just don't understand Beomgyu." You sighed, frustration evident in your voice. "He can be so oblivious to my needs and feelings. It's like he's always caught up in his own world."
Heeseung nodded sympathetically, his gaze fixed on you. "I get it. Relationships can be complicated, and it's normal to have ups and downs. But remember, communication is key. Have you talked to him about how you feel?"
You sighed again, running a hand through your hair. "I've tried, but sometimes it feels like he doesn't really listen or take my concerns seriously. It's frustrating."
Heeseung's expression softened, and he reached out to place a comforting hand on your shoulder. "I understand how important it is to feel heard and understood. If you ever need someone to talk to, you know I'm here for you, right? Your happiness matters to me."
A small smile formed on your face as you looked at Heeseung. "Thank you, Heeseung. I'm really grateful to have you as my friend. You always know how to make me feel better."
Heeseung smiled back, his eyes filled with a mix of fondness and longing. "That's what friends are for, right? I'll always be here for you, no matter what."
Just friends, nothing more.
Heeseung, wanting to alleviate your disappointment, mustered the courage to offer a solution. "Hey, if you don't want those movie tickets to go to waste, I could go with you instead. We can make it a fun outing, just the two of us." He tried his best to sound cheerful, hoping to turn the situation around and spend quality time with you, even if it meant setting aside his own feelings.
You looked at Heeseung, surprise evident in your eyes. "Really? You'd go with me?"
Heeseung nodded, a small smile tugging at his lips. "Of course. I wouldn't want those tickets to go to waste, and besides, it'll be fun. We can grab some snacks, enjoy the movie, and have a great time together."
A mixture of gratitude and excitement washed over you as you realized you wouldn't have to miss out on the movie after all. "Thank you, Heeseung. That means a lot to me. I'm really looking forward to it."
Heeseung's smile widened, but deep inside, he couldn't help but wish it was more than just a friendly outing. Nevertheless, he pushed those thoughts aside, determined to make the most of the time he would spend with you.
It was time. Heeseung stood outside the theater, waiting for you to join him. He couldn't help but feel a mix of nervousness and anticipation. It was just a movie outing with a friend, but it felt significant to him.
As you approached, Heeseung's heart skipped a beat. You looked stunning, a smile lighting up your face as you greeted him. "Hey, Heeseung! Sorry for keeping you waiting."
Heeseung shook his head, a warm smile on his lips. "No worries at all. I'm glad you made it. Shall we go in?"
You nodded eagerly, and together you entered the theater. "I'll grab our tickets, and you can take care of the snacks," you suggested, prompting a nod from Heeseung before he headed towards the snack counter. He contemplated whether to get two small bags of popcorn or opt for a large bucket. Eventually, he settled on the large one, partly for its convenience in carrying, but deep down, he couldn't help but hope for subtle moments when your hands would touch while reaching for the popcorn.
Returning to you with his arms full of snacks, Heeseung couldn't hide his satisfied grin. You looked at the amount of snacks in awe, surprised he had gotten so much. Heeseung chuckled, realizing he might have gone a little overboard with the snacks. "Yeah, I might have gotten carried away with the popcorn. But hey, we won't go hungry during the movie!"
You giggled and took a handful of gummy worms, popping one into your mouth. "I appreciate your enthusiasm for snacks. You know me too well, Heeseung."
Heeseung couldn't help but feel a surge of happiness at your words. He loved how easily you could share these simple moments together. As you settled into your seats, Heeseung couldn't help but steal glances at you. The dimmed lights added a certain glow to your features, and he found himself captivated by your presence.
As the lights dimmed and the film started, you settled into your seats, passing the snacks between you. During the movie, there were moments when your hands brushed against each other while reaching for the snacks, bringing a subtle thrill to Heeseung.
You both shared a lighthearted laugh, enjoying the anticipation of the movie ahead. Throughout the movie, Heeseung laughed at the funny scenes, sharing popcorn and exchanging comments with you. He enjoyed the easy conversation, the shared moments of laughter, and the shared snacks. It felt comfortable and familiar, yet a part of him longed for something more.
As the credits rolled and the lights came up, you turned to Heeseung with a satisfied smile. "That movie was amazing! Thanks for the snacks, Heeseung. You always know how to make things more enjoyable."
Heeseung smiled warmly at you, feeling a sense of contentment. "I'm glad you liked it. It was my pleasure, really."
Leaving the theater, you walked side by side, engaged in lively conversation about the movie. Heeseung couldn't help but think about how wonderful it would be if these outings were more than just friendly gestures. But for now, he cherished every moment spent with you, silently hoping that one day the line between friendship and something more would blur.
"My Uber is about to arrive," you announced, glancing at your phone to check for updates.
"Alright," Heeseung nodded briskly.
"I'll see you tomorrow, okay? Thank you so much for keeping me company today." You expressed your gratitude, a genuine smile lighting up your face as you waved goodbye.
Heeseung waved back, watching you as you walked away. The chilly air nipped at his cheeks, but a warmth spread through his being. It wasn't just the physical warmth he sought, but the warmth that came from being in your presence, even for a short while.
As he strolled along with his hands tucked in his pockets, he couldn't help but reflect on the day's events. The shared laughter, the moments of closeness, and the genuine connection he felt with you brought a sense of fulfillment that transcended the wintry weather. He couldn't deny the happiness that blossomed within him, fueling his hope for a future where he could be more than just a friend in your life.
With each step, Heeseung carried the flickering flame of his feelings, knowing that one day he would have to summon the courage to illuminate the truth and reveal the depths of his affection and desire. Until then, he treasured the memories made and the moments shared, cherishing the warmth that enveloped him as he embarked on his journey towards an uncertain but hopeful tomorrow.
All he could do was hope. And that hope was ignited just because of today.
SIX.
Five months into the school year, the weird nature of your relationship with Beomgyu continued. The on-again, off-again pattern left you feeling confused and hurt. Sometimes he would be present, acting as if nothing had happened, only to suddenly vanish without a warning. It was a rollercoaster of emotions that took its toll on your heart.
Throughout it all, Heeseung stood by your side, silently witnessing your pain. He despised seeing you upset, especially over someone who claimed to be your lover. He wanted to be the one who could bring you stability and happiness—the person you could rely on without fear of abandonment.
"I don't understand why he keeps doing this to you," Heeseung expressed with a mix of frustration and concern. "You deserve so much better—someone who will treat you with the love and respect you deserve."
You looked up at Heeseung, grateful for his unwavering support. "I don't know, Hee. I keep holding onto the hope that things will change and that he'll finally commit and be there for me. But it's exhausting."
Heeseung reached out, gently rubbing his hand on your back. “You know, it’s okay to reconsider your relationship with him.”
As tears welled up in your eyes and you buried your face in your knees, you confessed, "I know, Hee. Love doesn't just vanish easily. Despite everything, I still have feelings for him. You know, I still love him."
Heeseung's heart shattered, resonating with your pain, though you remained unaware of his own hidden emotions.
“Yeah…love doesn’t disappear easily, no matter the obstacle someone could face,” he replied, forcing a bitter smile, careful to conceal his own feelings that mirrored yours.
Heeseung's words caught you off guard, and you looked up at him, wiping away your tears. "What do you mean?"
Heeseung hesitated for a moment, choosing his words carefully. "I mean, sometimes we hold onto love even when it hurts us, even when we know deep down that it may not be the best thing for us. It's difficult to let go, especially when our hearts are involved."
You furrowed your brows, trying to understand his cryptic message. "Are you...talking about me and Beomgyu?"
Don’t slip up, Heeseung.
Heeseung sighed, his gaze filled with empathy. "I'm just saying that sometimes we need to prioritize our own happiness and well-being. Love should bring us joy and fulfillment, not constant pain and uncertainty."
Why was his love for you hurting him instead?
You nodded slowly, the weight of his words sinking in. "I guess you're right. It's just hard to let go of something that meant so much to me."
Whew, he escaped that easily.
Tears welled up in your eyes once again, but this time they were tears of gratitude. "Thank you, Heeseung. Thank you for being there for me and helping me see things more clearly."
Heeseung gave you a warm smile, his heartache masked by genuine concern. "Anytime, YN. I'll always be here for you, supporting you every step of the way. Just please talk to him.”
“I’ll try.” You see him offering a hug, which you gladly accept. You felt comfortable in his embrace, feeling the tension in your body disappear.
You felt better, while someone else watched you two in anger.
It was Beomgyu. Why? He doesn’t even know.
Beomgyu hurriedly approached, his hand reaching out to grab your arm.
"What the heck, Gyu?" you exclaimed, caught off guard by his sudden action.
"Let's have a conversation," he said urgently.
"Out of nowhere?" you questioned, puzzled by his timing.
"Isn't that what you've been asking for?" Beomgyu retorted, his voice tinged with frustration.
Yeah, but after five fucking months?” You scoffed, not believing the words coming out of his mouth.
“Now, I've been distant, and I apologize for that. I've been trying to figure things out, but it's not fair to you. I don't want to string you along if I'm not sure about us anymore."
A mix of frustration and sadness welled up within you. "So, what are you saying? Are you breaking up with me?"
Beomgyu sighed, his gaze falling to the ground. "I... I don't know. I’m not saying that. I need some time to think and to sort through my feelings. That’s why I keep telling you to talk to me." Frustration starts to get to him, still keeping his grip on your arm.
Heeseung, who had been standing nearby, watching the tense exchange, couldn't bear to see you in pain. He stepped forward, placing a comforting hand on your back. "Hey, it's going to be okay," he reassured softly, his voice filled with empathy.
"Hey, let's step away from this for a moment," he urged gently, trying to diffuse the situation.
Beomgyu's eyes narrowed, his anger turning towards Heeseung. "What's your problem? Stay out of this!" He snapped, his voice laced with frustration.
Heeseung stood his ground, his voice steady. "I care about her, and I can't stand by and watch her get hurt. We both want what's best for her, don't we?"
Beomgyu clenched his fists, his expression filled with defiance. "Don't act like you know what's best for her. She's my girlfriend, not yours!"
Heeseung's gaze hardened, his protective instincts kicking in. "What’s wrong with you? It's not about me or you. It's about her happiness, and right now, she's hurting. So, I'm going to make sure she's okay."
Beomgyu's face hardened, a stubborn determination replacing his previous uncertainty. He loosened his grip, gritting his teeth. "Fine, but this isn't over. We'll talk, just not now."
As Beomgyu walked away, leaving you and Heeseung behind, the weight of the situation settled heavily on you. But with Heeseung by your side, offering his unwavering support, you found a glimmer of strength amidst the pain.
With determination in his eyes, Heeseung gently tried to guide your mind away from the heated argument, leading you to a quieter and more peaceful space where he could offer you the comfort and support you needed.
“You okay?” Heeseung asked, looking at your not-okay state.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” You said, lying straight through your teeth. You were not fine; how could you be?
“It’s okay; just be honest with me,” Heeseung said, sitting beside you.
Be honest. It's ironic for him to be saying such a thing. Was he being honest with you? Definitely not, but he argues that it’s for the greater good.
“I don’t think me and Beomgyu are going to work out,” you sighed, running your hand through your hair. “I think it’s over.”
“Oh,” Heeseung says, the only word slipping out of his mouth.
Heeseung's heart ached with conflicting emotions. He questioned his own motives, wondering why he still felt compelled to pursue you despite knowing that you loved Beomgyu so deeply. The weight of seeing you sad and torn between two people crushed him, as he couldn't bear the thought of causing you any more pain.
"Why am I even doing this?" Heeseung thought to himself, doubt lingering in his mind. "What's the point of chasing someone who will soon be my best friend's ex and still has feelings for him?"
Yet, as he contemplated these questions, he couldn't ignore the fact that you were his best friend, someone he cared deeply about. The bond you shared was special, and he cherished every moment spent together. It was that connection that made him question if he should listen to his doubts or follow his heart.
Heeseung wrestled with his conflicting feelings, torn between his desire for your happiness and his own emotional well-being. The uncertainty gnawed at him, leaving him uncertain of the path he should take.
Would he rather be a supporting character or a second love interest that gets pushed away?
The answer was clear. Maybe it was time to question his doubts—his doubts about pursuing you.
Maybe.
SEVEN.
"You're telling me you two got back together again?" Heeseung asked, trying to hide his disappointed tone.
He had hoped that things would have changed, that you would have realized your worth and moved on from the tiring relationship with Beomgyu. But hearing that you had reconnected with him only deepened his disappointment.
Heeseung's heart sank as he braced himself for the answer, knowing that it would confirm his fears. Yet he couldn't help but hope for a different outcome—a chance for him to finally express his true feelings for you.
"Yeah, we worked things out," you replied, oblivious to the underlying emotions in Heeseung's voice. “He apologized and got me gifts.”
Heeseung forced a smile, though it didn't quite reach his eyes. "I'm glad to hear that," he said, his voice sounding a bit strained.
You looked at him, sensing something was off. "Hee, are you okay?"
Heeseung quickly composed himself and nodded. "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just... surprised, I guess. But if you're happy, that's what matters."
You reached out and touched his arm, concern evident in your eyes. "Thanks, Hee. You're such a good best friend."
Best friend. The words echoed in Heeseung's mind, causing a wave of frustration and longing. He despised how effortlessly those two words rolled off your tongue, unaware of the impact they had on him. It felt like a constant reminder of the boundary he could never cross and the role he would forever play in your life.
Heeseung yearned for a time when he could fully embrace being your best friend without the conflicting emotions that accompanied it. He wished he could accept his title and find contentment in it, but his heart yearned for more. The desire to be more than just a friend consumed him, even as he fought against it.
Every time he heard those words, a mixture of hope and pain washed over him. He longed for a day when he could call you more than just a friend, when he could openly express his true feelings without fear of jeopardizing the precious bond you shared.
"Yeah, your best friend," Heeseung replied through gritted teeth, his tone laced with a mix of bitterness and resignation. He tried his best to mask his true feelings and make it seem like he was content with being just that. But inside, his heart ached with unspoken longing and unfulfilled desires.
He will just continue what he’s best at. So he played the part, pretending that being your best friend was enough, even when it tore him apart inside. He swallowed his own yearnings, hiding them beneath a facade of acceptance, all the while silently hoping that one day you would see him in a different light.
"You want to go to the party tonight?" You asked, attempting to shift the mood and bring a spark of excitement into the conversation.
"What party?" Heeseung inquired, his tone slightly disinterested.
"You know, Mark's party. I heard his parents left for work again," you explained, hoping to pique his interest.
Heeseung hesitated for a moment before responding, "I'll think about it."
"Come on, it's our final year! Let's loosen up a bit and have some fun," you urged, hoping to persuade him to join in on the festivities.
Heeseung looked at you with a mix of uncertainty and longing. He wanted to be there for you, to make you happy, but the idea of attending a party where he might have to witness you with someone else was a painful thought. Nevertheless, he couldn't bear to let you down.
"Alright, I'll go," he finally agreed, mustering a smile despite the conflicting emotions swirling within him. "Let's make it a memorable night."
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"Hey Heeseung, are you ready—" Sunghoon's voice interrupted Heeseung's frantic search as he opened the door. Sunghoon's eyes widened at the sight of the chaotic scene in Heeseung's room. Clothes were strewn all over the place, making it nearly impossible to find a suitable outfit.
"Heeseung, what the hell?" Sunghoon exclaimed, bewildered by the mess.
Heeseung sighed, feeling a mix of frustration and self-doubt. "I don't know, Sunghoon. I just... I want to find the right outfit, you know? Something that makes me feel good and confident."
Sunghoon shook his head, a knowing smile playing on his lips. "You're overthinking it, Heeseung. Trust me, you always look great, no matter what you wear. Just pick something and let's go have some fun."
"Who are you trying to impress?" Sunghoon chuckled, enjoying the sight of his friend's newfound determination.
You. He was trying to impress you tonight. Heeseung hesitated for a moment, the truth lingering on the tip of his tongue. But he couldn't bring himself to admit it, not even to his closest friend. "No one," he replied, trying to play it off casually.
Sunghoon raised an eyebrow, seeing through Heeseung's response. "You're a big liar," he teased. "But fine, I'll help you out. Let's find you something that will turn heads."
As they sifted through the clothes together, Sunghoon offered suggestions and shared his fashion expertise. Heeseung appreciated his friend's support and the distraction it provided from his own conflicted feelings. Deep down, he knew that impressing you shouldn't be his main priority, but he couldn't help but want to stand out in your eyes.
After a few moments of searching, he pulled out a well-fitting black button-down shirt. Its sleek design and subtle pattern added a touch of sophistication.
He paired the shirt with dark black jeans that hugged his frame just right, emphasizing his slender figure. The jeans were slightly distressed, giving off a cool and effortless vibe. Heeseung knew they were one of your favorite pairs, and he hoped you would notice.
To complete the ensemble, he opted for a pair of black shoes that added a simple touch to the overall look. They were comfortable yet stylish, striking the perfect balance between casual and put-together.
As Heeseung looked at himself in the mirror, he couldn't help but feel a surge of confidence. The outfit accentuated his best features, highlighting his charm and charisma. He knew he looked good, and he hoped it would catch your attention.
As they finally settled on an outfit, Heeseung looked at himself in the mirror, feeling a newfound sense of confidence. Sunghoon grinned, giving him a thumbs up. "Looking good, Heeseung. Now let's go and make some memories tonight."
Heeseung nodded, appreciating Sunghoon's friendship more than ever. "Thanks, Sunghoon. I don't know what I'd do without you."
Sunghoon shrugged with a playful smirk on his face. "Hey, that's what best friends are for, right?” Sunghoon and Heeseung walk out, walking side by side, getting ready to go to Mark’s house.
And as expected, Heeseung stepped into the vibrant atmosphere of the party, immediately engulfed by the pulsating beats of the music and the contagious energy of the crowd. The room was filled with colorful lights, illuminating the main room, where people were already showing off their moves.
He glanced towards the backyard, where Mark's large swimming pool became the center of attention. Laughter and splashing sounds filled the air as people cannonballed into the water or lounged on inflatable floats, enjoying the refreshing respite from the heat.
The party was in full swing, with friends mingling, sharing laughter, and creating memories. Heeseung navigated through the lively crowd, feeling a mix of excitement and curiosity. He wondered if you were already there, enjoying the festivities and embracing the carefree spirit of the night. As they continued walking, they spotted Mark, who soon noticed their presence.
"Hey, look who decided to grace us with his presence!" Mark exclaimed, pulling Heeseung into a friendly hug. "I didn't expect you to show up, man."
Sunghoon chuckled, joining in the teasing. "Yeah, I thought Heeseung was allergic to parties or something."
Heeseung shrugged, feigning nonchalance. "Well, you know how it is. It's senior year; I've got to make some memories."
Deep down, he knew he was lying. The real reason he had decided to come was you. Only your presence could have convinced him to step out of his comfort zone and immerse himself in the party atmosphere. But he wasn't ready to share that truth just yet.
Sunghoon chuckled, nudging Heeseung playfully. "Yeah, right. We all know there's a secret motive behind your sudden interest in parties."
Heeseung shrugged, trying to play it cool. "Maybe I just wanted to let loose and have some fun."
Mark grinned, oblivious to the unspoken tension. "Well, you came to the right place! Let's make some unforgettable memories tonight!"
As the music thumped in the background and the laughter of partygoers filled the air, Heeseung's gaze scanned the crowd, hoping to catch a glimpse of you. He couldn't help but wonder how the night would unfold and if fate would bring them closer or keep them apart. But for now, he pushed those thoughts aside, determined to enjoy the moment and make the most of the night ahead.
As Heeseung scanned the room, his gaze landed on you, and time seemed to stand still. You were in the midst of a joyous conversation, your laughter filling the air. In that moment, it felt like the entire party faded into the background, and there was only you, illuminated by the soft glow of the lights. He couldn't help but be captivated by your beauty, his breath catching in his chest.
Your smile reached your eyes, and the sight of it sent warmth surging through Heeseung's veins. He felt a mix of emotions stirring within him—admiration, longing, and an unspoken desire. In that instant, he couldn't deny the strong pull he felt towards you and the way your presence had the power to brighten his world.
Heeseung's heart skipped a beat as he took a step closer, drawn to you like a magnet. However, he quickly reminded himself to maintain his composure. Tonight was about having fun, not revealing the depth of his feelings. With a subtle smile, he made his way towards you, ready to just see you up close. He left Sunghoon with his group of friends, walking towards you.
"Hey Hee," you replied, your smile growing wider as you took in his appearance. Something about him seemed different tonight, and you couldn't help but notice how attractive he looked. His hair fell casually over his forehead, giving him a slightly tousled yet effortlessly stylish look. The partially unbuttoned shirt revealed a glimpse of his collarbone, adding to his overall appeal. As he settled down beside you, you couldn't help but appreciate his presence, though a voice in your head scolded you for even thinking about your best friend in such terms.
You shook off the fleeting thought, reminding yourself of your friendship. It was only natural to notice when someone you cared about looked good, right?
"You look great," Heeseung complimented, his words barely audible over the blaring music.
"Hm?" you tried to respond, straining to hear him amidst the noise.
Seeing your confusion, Heeseung leaned closer, his lips almost brushing against your ear as he whispered, "You look pretty tonight."
His words sent an unexpected shiver down your spine, and you couldn't help but feel a rush of warmth spread through your body. This wasn't the usual Heeseung you knew. There was something different about him tonight—a newfound confidence that intrigued and captivated you.
Lost for words, you simply smiled in response, appreciating the unexpected compliment. “You too,” you whispered in his ear, gaining a grin from Heeseung. He’s glad he looks great tonight; nobody else’s opinion matters now but yours.
"Where's Beomgyu?" Heeseung couldn't help but inquire, his curiosity getting the better of him as he searched the crowded party for any sign of his friend.
"He's off with his own friends. We decided to go our separate ways for the night," you replied with a hint of disappointment in your voice.
"Why?" Heeseung pressed further, genuinely wanting to understand the dynamics between you and Beomgyu.
You shrugged, a mixture of frustration and resignation evident on your face. "I don't know. He's got some friends he wants to impress, I guess."
Heeseung's heart sank a little at your response, knowing that you deserved better than being left behind for others. At that moment, an idea crossed his mind, and he mustered up the courage to offer it.
"Well, if he's not around, I can keep you company for the night," he suggested, his voice laced with a mix of sincerity and a hint of nervousness. Deep down, he hoped that you would accept his offer and give him a chance to show you a different kind of friendship—one that was unwavering and genuine.
You looked at Heeseung, surprised by his offer. A part of you wanted to decline, fearing that it could complicate your friendship. But another part of you, one that craved his unwavering presence, couldn't help but consider the idea.
A smile played on your lips as you nodded. "I'd love that, Hee. It's always a good time with you."
Heeseung's face lit up with a mixture of relief and joy. He couldn't hide the happiness that swelled within him at your acceptance. For a moment, he forgot about his own unrequited feelings, focusing instead on making sure you had a memorable night.
As the night unfolded, you and Heeseung found yourselves engaged in lively conversations, laughter, and shared moments that reinforced the deep bond between you. Heeseung went out of his way to ensure you felt valued and appreciated, his unwavering support evident in every word and action.
You couldn't help but notice how different Heeseung was tonight—more confident, more present. And you found yourself seeing him in a new light, appreciating the depth of his friendship and the genuine care he had for you.
As the party continued, you found yourself losing track of time, completely immersed in the connection you shared with Heeseung. The music blared in the background, but it seemed distant compared to the warmth and comfort you found in each other's presence.
Eventually, the night began to wind down, and the party started to thin out. You and Heeseung found a quieter corner where you could talk without shouting over the music. The atmosphere became more intimate, and the energy between you grew palpable.
You and Heeseung found a tranquil spot outside, settling down on the grass and gazing up at the starry sky. The twinkling stars illuminated the darkness, creating a serene backdrop for your conversation.
A peaceful silence enveloped the two of you, offering a respite from the blaring music that still echoed from the party house. The ambiance felt both calm and tinged with a hint of melancholy, causing Heeseung's thoughts to revolve around you. Concern for your well-being mingled with his own personal worries, making him feel an unexpected surge of boldness.
Under the night sky, as the gentle breeze swept through, Heeseung found himself captivated by the moment. The weight of his emotions and the intensity of his connection with you compelled him to embrace the vulnerability of the present.
Heeseung's gaze shifted from the stars to your face, his eyes filled with a mix of tenderness and determination. It was as if the night had emboldened him to confront the unspoken feelings that had long resided within his heart.
"I love you," Heeseung confessed, his voice carrying a mix of apprehension and sincerity.
Your eyes widened in surprise, caught off guard by his sudden declaration. Initially, you brushed it off as his casual sentimentality, assuming he was merely in one of those cheesy yet cringe-worthy moods. After all, it was dark outside, and the night had a way of making people more introspective and sentimental.
For Heeseung, it was a rare opportunity to release the weight of his emotions. It was the only moment he could unburden himself, knowing that you wouldn't suspect anything beyond a platonic exchange. It was his chance to express his true feelings without you realizing the depth of his affection.
You smiled, patting him gently on the back and reciprocating his words with a lighthearted tone. "I love you too, Heeseung."
But within Heeseung, a bittersweet sensation lingered. Why did your response feel so effortless, devoid of any romantic intentions? Why did those words, which he had longed to hear, now taste somewhat bitter?
He had always imagined that such sweet words, exchanged between two people in love, would bring joy and contentment. But instead, they evoked a sense of unease within him—a mixture of guilt and confusion.
"Are you okay, Hee?" you asked, concern evident in your voice.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry," Heeseung replied, offering a small smile to conceal the turmoil he felt inside. It was another lie slipping effortlessly from his lips, mirroring the ease with which you had spoken those words to him.
At that moment, Heeseung realized that you both shared something in common. The ability to utter those words without fully grasping their weight or the impact they carried. And perhaps, in that shared understanding, he found solace, alleviating some of the guilt that had consumed him.
EIGHT.
"It's been six months. College application responses are starting to come back, and it's making this whole month nerve-wracking," you confessed to Heeseung, your voice filled with anxiety. Once again, Beomgyu wasn't present, despite his promises. At this point, you had learned not to get your hopes up anymore.
"I'm sure your dream school will accept you. Results come out today, right?" Heeseung reassured you, trying to offer you some comfort.
"Yeah, for some schools. But I'm nervous about us not being able to get into the same school," you admitted, your worry palpable.
Heeseung shared the same fear. The thought of being separated from you, especially during such a crucial time in your lives, weighed heavily on his mind. Yet he never wanted to sever ties with you. You had made a promise to always stick together, no matter what obstacles you faced.
"Well, we're all going to pursue different professions, aren't we?" Heeseung reasoned, hoping to ease your concerns.
"I guess... God, it's almost time," you muttered, feeling the tension build as the moment of truth approached.
"Do you want to check alone?" you asked, contemplating whether you should face the results on your own.
"We can check our emails together to see if we get a response back," Heeseung suggested, offering to share the moment with you.
"That sounds good. Let's sit outside," you agreed, seeking solace in the open air.
"Heeseung, it's telling me to check my portal. Oh my god!" you exclaimed, feeling a surge of panic as you settled down.
Heeseung, who hadn't received any notification, calmly replied, "Oh, I didn't get anything yet. Just go check."
Nervously, you took a deep breath, your palms sweaty and your legs trembling. This was your dream school, and the anticipation was almost unbearable.
"Okay, I'm logging in," you announced, mustering the courage to face the outcome.
You entered your login information, your heart pounding with each key pressed. Heeseung watched you intently, sharing your anxiety even though his own fate was yet to be revealed.
As the webpage loaded, time seemed to slow down. The anticipation was palpable as you navigated to the admissions section. Your eyes scanned the screen, searching for the decisive message that would determine your future.
And there it was—a notification in bold letters, your heart skipping a beat. You clicked on it, and a mixture of relief and joy washed over you as you read the words: "Congratulations! You have been accepted to your dream school."
Tears of happiness welled up in your eyes, and you turned to Heeseung, beaming with excitement. "Heeseung, I got in! I can't believe it!"
Heeseung's face lit up with a genuine smile as he watched you get all excited.
"That's amazing! I knew you would make it. Congratulations!" He exclaimed, pulling you into a tight hug.
"I can't believe it! I got in!" you exclaimed, your eyes gleaming with joy.
“That was all you, YN! I’m so proud of you!” Heeseung beamed, a proud smile spreading across his face.
You couldn't contain your excitement, and a wide grin adorned your face. "Thank you, Heeseung! I'm so grateful for your support throughout this journey."
As the realization of your achievement settled in, you couldn't wait to share the news with your parents. Their pride and joy would only amplify the happiness you were feeling at that moment.
Curiosity filled the air as you turned to Heeseung, eager to know the outcome of his own college application. "Have you received your results yet?"
Heeseung shook his head with a hint of anticipation. "Not yet, but I'm staying hopeful. Now, let's focus on celebrating your success. How about we grab a meal together? It's my treat for your incredible achievement."
Your heart swelled with gratitude, touched by Heeseung's gesture. "That sounds wonderful, Hee! Thank you for always being there for me. I couldn't have done it without you."
As you entered your favorite restaurant, a sense of comfort washed over you. The familiar surroundings and inviting aromas instantly put you at ease. You settled into a cozy booth, ready to indulge in a well-deserved celebration.
Heeseung's words resonated with warmth as he encouraged you: "Order whatever you want, YN. Today is your day, and I want to treat you."
A smile played on your lips, appreciating his generosity and thoughtfulness. "Thank you, Heeseung. You're too kind."
Glancing at the menu, your eyes danced over the delectable options. From savory dishes to mouthwatering desserts, it was a tantalizing array of choices. You couldn't resist the temptation of your all-time favorite dish: savory pasta with creamy sauce and succulent grilled chicken.
"I think I'll go with the pasta," you declared, excitement bubbling in your voice.
Heeseung nodded, his own eyes scanning the menu. "Great choice! I'll have the same.”
While you excused yourself to use the bathroom, Heeseung's attention was drawn to the familiar chime of his phone. He retrieved it from his pocket and glanced at the screen, his heart skipping a beat when he saw the email notification. Curiosity piqued, he opened the email, his eyes scanning the contents anxiously.
As he read the message, a mix of emotions washed over him. The update from one of his chosen schools had arrived, bringing a surge of anticipation and nervousness. He couldn't help but feel a knot forming in his stomach, wondering what awaited him in that email.
With bated breath, he absorbed the words on the screen, his eyes darting across the lines. Time seemed to stand still as he processed the information, his heart pounding in his chest. As the realization sank in, Heeseung's eyes widened with a mix of astonishment and elation. He had been accepted into his dream school, the very place he had yearned to be since he was young. It was an incredible achievement, the culmination of years of hard work and dedication.
However, alongside his joy, a tinge of bittersweetness crept into his heart. The realization hit him that the school he had been accepted to was located in a different country, far away from where you would be pursuing your studies. The paths that once seemed intertwined were now diverging, leading in separate directions.
Heeseung couldn't help but feel a sense of longing and a pang of sadness at the prospect of being physically apart from you. The thought of not sharing the same campus, the same classes, and the same experiences together weighed heavily on his mind.
His mind raced with conflicting thoughts and emotions. On one hand, he was ecstatic about his acceptance and the opportunities that awaited him at his dream school. On the other hand, he grappled with the uncertainty of maintaining your close bond and the fear of growing distant due to the physical distance between you.
Is he just going to have to love you from a distance? Taking a deep breath, Heeseung reminded himself that change was a natural part of life. Sometimes, pursuing one's dreams meant making difficult choices and embracing new chapters, even if it meant temporary separation from loved ones. He knew deep down that both of you had your own unique paths to follow and that growth and new experiences awaited each of you.
As you returned to the table, his eyes met yours, and he mustered a smile, although a hint of sadness lingered behind it. He wanted to cherish every moment and every shared memory and support you in your own journey, even if it meant being physically apart.
As Heeseung observed your radiant smile, he couldn't bring himself to dampen your spirits on such a momentous day. It was your special day, and he wanted nothing more than to see you happy and free from worries. The thought of tears staining your cheeks again, especially after the pain you had endured over Beomgyu, tore at his heart.
He wrestled with his own emotions, torn between the desire to be by your side and the yearning to pursue his own dreams. It was a difficult decision to make, as his departure was never his intention. He had never wanted to leave you or add another departure to the list of loved ones who had left your side. Yet he knew deep down that he couldn't simply give up on his dream.
The opportunity that awaited him at his dream school was something he had longed for and worked tirelessly to achieve. It was a chance to grow, to learn, and to become the best version of himself. Heeseung understood that sacrificing his dream would only breed resentment and regret in the long run.
However, that didn't mean he would abandon you or sever the bond you shared. He made a silent promise to himself that, despite the physical distance, he would always be there for you, supporting you in every way possible.
Now, every time Heeseung catches a glimpse of you smiling, his heart will be torn into pieces. It was a painful reminder that he would soon no longer see you give him that smile. If Beomgyu wasn’t such a piece of trash, he would have something less to worry about.
NINE.
As Heeseung crossed off each day on his calendar with a red marker, a wave of sadness washed over him. It was a constant ache in his heart, a reminder of the remaining days he was going to be able to see you in person.
Whenever you visited and asked about his college acceptances, he would conceal his true feelings and claim that he was simply counting down the days until graduation. The lies weighed heavily on him, but he had become accustomed to masking his emotions from you.
You, on the other hand, were genuinely thrilled for him, believing that he would attend a school near yours. Even if you ended up at different schools, you were confident that your friendship would remain intact, envisioning moments where you could still crash at his place and keep in touch.
If only you knew the truth. If only you knew that a significant amount of time would pass before you would see each other again. It would be a separation so prolonged that the risk of forgetting each other lurked in the shadows. Heeseung couldn't fathom the thought of you slipping from his memory, but he wondered if the same held true for you.
Heeseung grappled with the daunting task of how and when to tell you about his upcoming departure. The weight of his secret pressed heavily upon him, and he knew he couldn't keep it hidden forever. But finding the right moment and method to reveal the truth was a challenge he wrestled with daily.
Should he plan a heart-to-heart conversation, choosing a quiet and intimate setting where he could lay bare his feelings? Or perhaps he should seize a spontaneous moment when emotions were running high and honesty seemed more accessible? Heeseung contemplated the various scenarios, each with its own set of risks and uncertainties.
He wanted to find the perfect balance between timing and your emotional state, ensuring that his revelation wouldn't overshadow any important events or milestones in your life. Heeseung wished for a moment when you could both be fully present, where he could express himself openly without the fear of disrupting the joy and happiness you deserve.
But as days turned into weeks, Heeseung's inner turmoil grew. The weight of his secret intensified, and the fear of losing you became more tangible. He knew that he couldn't delay the inevitable forever, yet the right words eluded him.
It was hard. Harder than he had expected.
But that was okay; he still had more time.
But clearly not enough.
TEN.
"I'm nervous," you chuckled, sitting under the familiar shade of the tree with Heeseung. It has become a regular spot for your daily hangouts, despite already spending so much time together every day.
Heeseung grinned, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Why are you nervous? You've never been nervous around me before."
You shrugged, fidgeting with a blade of grass. "I guess it's just this weird mix of excitement and uncertainty. You know, once school ends, everyone is going to be going their own ways."
Heeseung leaned back against the tree trunk, observing you with a gentle gaze. “Yeah, that’s true. But you know, I've always got your back. Even if we get different professions.”
A faint smile crossed your lips as you appreciated his words of comfort. "Thank you, Heeseung. I'm really grateful to have you as my friend. I knew you would stick around."
"I don't know what I did to deserve you," you chuckled, feeling the breeze brush your hair away as you sat on the grass with Heeseung.
What did Heeseung do to deserve you? Heeseung couldn't help but smile at your words, a mix of gratitude and self-doubt swirling within him. He looked at you, the person who had been there for him through thick and thin, the one who had always believed in him and supported him unconditionally.
“I could say the same for you.” Heeseung smiled bitterly, knowing he would soon hurt you, probably more than Beomgyu did.
"Say YN, what if I suddenly left without a word?" Heeseung's voice was filled with a tinge of sadness as he contemplated the question. The weight of his thoughts hung in the air, causing a ripple of unease to pass through you.
"All of a sudden?" You turned to face him, looking into his eyes with genuine concern.
He hesitated, his gaze shifting to the ground. "Yeah. What if?"
"You wouldn't." You stared off into the sky, listening to the birds chirp, as silence enveloped you both.
His heart clenched, feeling the need to break into pieces. Of course he wouldn't, but he had to. He watched as the leaves on the tree above rustled and gently fell, their descent mirroring his swirling emotions. He let out a bitter smile, unable to hide the pain in his eyes.
"Yeah, I wouldn't," he replied, his voice filled with a mixture of resignation and longing.
Your heart skipped a beat, a sudden surge of concern and confusion washing over you. Why did his question and response affect you so deeply? You looked at him, studying his face as the wind tousled his hair, adding a touch of ethereal charm. Your eyes met, and you found yourself momentarily captivated, unable to tear your gaze away.
Heeseung let out a soft laugh, a familiar sound that never failed to warm your heart. You felt a faint blush creeping onto your cheeks, the realization of your own emotions catching you off guard. Could it be possible that you were starting to develop feelings for your best friend? The thought seemed both exhilarating and terrifying, leaving you grappling with a whirlwind of emotions.
But no, you quickly dismissed the idea. It couldn't be. You and Heeseung were best friends and nothing more. The bond you shared was precious, and you were afraid to jeopardize it with romantic complications. It was just a passing moment, a fleeting thought that you would tuck away and bury deep within your heart.
"If you had to, I wouldn't mind. It's not like I could do anything," you continued, your voice tinged with a hint of resignation. "But promise me, Heeseung, promise me that you'll tell me, even if it's just a hypothetical scenario."
Heeseung's heart ached at your words, feeling the weight of your trust and acceptance. How could he break it to you? How could he shatter the harmony of your friendship with the painful truth? He wrestled with his own emotions—a battle between love and self-sacrifice.
"Yeah, of course," he replied, his voice carrying a mixture of longing and sadness. He let out a small sigh, a silent release of the turmoil swirling within him. Heeseung's frustration gnawed at him as he reflected on his missed opportunity to tell you about his impending departure. He couldn't shake the feeling that he had let another chance slip away, leaving him questioning his own hesitation.
"Why is it so hard to tell her?" Heeseung muttered to himself, his voice filled with a mix of disappointment and self-doubt. He knew he had valid reasons for his silence, but the weight of his unspoken truth weighed heavily on his conscience.
As he replayed the scenarios in his mind, he realized that fear had played a significant role in his inability to open up to you. Fear of your reaction, fear of hurting you, and fear of losing the precious bond you shared. It was easier to keep his feelings hidden to spare both of you the pain of saying goodbye.
But now, in the wake of yet another missed opportunity, Heeseung couldn't deny the growing frustration that bubbled within him. He understood that time was slipping away, and with each passing day, the impending separation became more inevitable. The longer he remained silent, the harder it would be to find the right moment to reveal his truth.
He had to let you know.
ELEVEN.
“So you’re telling me that after breaking up with your ex, you started having feelings for your best friend?” Yoon exclaimed over the phone.
You broke up with Beomgyu a week ago, knowing things didn’t work out the way they used to. Since then, you both kept your distance, only seeing each other when you both went to see Heeseung. It was a pain in the ass to see him everywhere, pretending nothing had happened between you two.
“Ugh, don’t say it like that.” You winced, collapsing onto your bed. “As bad as it sounds, yes, I think I did. Ever since that party at Mark’s house.”
“No wonder why Mark’s parties are known to start love,” Yoon said bluntly, not judging you in the slightest. “People have always said that.”
"Please, just stop," you groaned, fully aware of the precarious position you found yourself in. It was undoubtedly a complicated situation.
Despite the awkwardness and confusion, you couldn't deny the undeniable chemistry and connection you shared with Heeseung. It felt like the lines between friendship and something more had blurred, and you were left grappling with newfound emotions and conflicting thoughts.
Yoon's voice softened, understanding the complexity of the situation. "I know it's messy, but sometimes love works in mysterious ways. You can't control who you develop feelings for. Just be honest with yourself and with Heeseung. It may lead to something beautiful."
You sighed, grateful for Yoon's support and advice. “Thanks Yoon, but I don’t want it to be seen like I only said I liked him because I just want to get over him.”
“What if he likes you, though?” Yoon was clearly invested in your love life.
“No way—him liking me? Impossible.” You denied. There was no way he liked you for all these years.
“I have seen the heart eyes he gives you. If you weren’t so smitten with your boyfriend, maybe you would’ve seen that.” Yoon chuckled, amused at how obvious you could be.
"I mean, if he likes you and you like him, shouldn't that be easy?" Yoon remarked, her voice laced with a touch of exasperation.
You let out a playful eye roll in response, fully aware of the complexities surrounding your situation. "Come on, Yoon, my ex was our best friend. It's not that simple."
Yoon pondered for a moment before offering her perspective. "Well, maybe you should just tell him. That way, if you ever do start showing interest, he won't feel like he's intruding or being a homewrecker."
A wave of disbelief washed over you. "Yoon, I'm not planning to hit on him! Besides, I'm pretty sure Heeseung already knows about the breakup. We've been avoiding each other lately."
Yoon raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. "And how sure are you about that?"
You paused, contemplating her question. "I'd say about 80 percent sure."
Yoon shook her head with a mischievous smile. "Not good enough, my friend. You need to be 100 percent certain."
An exasperated sigh escaped your lips as you playfully scolded her. "Oh, come on, Yoon. Can't you just trust me on this?"
Yoon grinned, refusing to back down. "Trust you? I trust you with a lot of things, but matters of the heart? Not so much."
You couldn't help but chuckle, appreciating Yoon's concern and her unwavering honesty. "Well, thanks for your vote of confidence, Yoon. But for now, let's just focus on our friendship drama, okay?"
Yoon nodded, a glint of mischief still evident in her eyes. "Fine, fine. But mark my words, you better figure out the Heeseung situation soon. Otherwise, I might just have to take matters into my own hands."
You playfully scolded Yoon over the phone, both of you laughing. Deep down, you knew Yoon had a point. The tangled web of emotions and unspoken desires between you and Heeseung couldn't be ignored forever. Just not right now.
It just might take a while for you to actually confess.
TWELVE.
Walking home together, you soon arrived at Heeseung's house. "Alright then, bye Hee! I can't stay over today; sorry about that."
Heeseung chuckled, finding your reaction amusing. "Don't worry about it. There's always a next time, right?"
Always a next time.
"Yeah, always," you replied with a smile, turning around to walk back home. As you made your way, your heart pounded in your chest, its rhythm matching the uncertainty and anticipation that filled your mind.
It was the seventh month of school, and the days seemed to be slipping away faster than either of you could have imagined. You were anxious about starting high school and stepping into a new chapter of your life, while Heeseung was burdened by the weight of when and how he should reveal his upcoming leave.
Heeseung fumbled with his keys, hastily unlocking the door to his house. As he stepped inside, he spotted Sunghoon lounging on the couch, munching on a bag of chips while engrossed in a TV show. “Hey, the least you could do is give me a heads-up when you crash at my place,” Heeseung quipped, his tone half-joking.
Sunghoon shrugged, his mouth full of chips. “Well, you always let YN pop up here almost every day. It seems like plain favoritism to me.”
Rolling his eyes, Heeseung tossed his bag next to the couch and made his way to the sink to wash his hands. “Just drop it, will you?”
Sunghoon continued munching, unfazed. “She’s not here today? I thought she was going to help you pack up. She always helps you out with that kind of stuff.”
Heeseung sighed, running the water over his hands. “No, she’s busy today. And well, I was packing, but I still have about two months left.”
Sunghoon chuckled with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Yeah, wait until graduation sneaks up on you and leaves you scrambling to get everything done in time. It’ll be quite the sight to see.”
Heeseung shot his friend a playful glare, water droplets falling from his hands onto the sink. "Thanks for the vote of confidence, Sunghoon. Really uplifting."
Sunghoon laughed, reaching for another handful of chips. "Hey, it's all part of the experience, my friend. But don't worry; I'm sure you'll manage. Be glad we are both going to the same college.”
Heeseung couldn't help but crack a smile, the banter with Sunghoon easing his worries, if only for a moment. "Yeah, yeah, I know.”
Heeseung settled down next to Sunghoon, helping himself to a handful of chips. "You know, I'm still worried," he admitted, his voice tinged with concern.
Sunghoon raised an eyebrow, his curiosity piqued. "Why? What's bothering you now?"
Heeseung sighed, his gaze fixed on the television screen. "I still haven't told YN."
Sunghoon's eyes widened in surprise. "What? You still haven't told her? Why not?"
Heeseung leaned back on the couch, feeling a weight on his shoulders. "I don't know; it just slipped my mind, I guess. I've been so caught up in my own thoughts and worries that I haven't found the right moment to bring it up. It's becoming a problem."
Sunghoon paused for a moment, contemplating his response. "Look, Heeseung, I understand that you want to focus on yourself and your relationship with YN, but keeping something like this from her is not fair to either of you. She deserves to know what's going on, especially if it's something that might impact your future together."
Heeseung nodded, realizing the truth in Sunghoon's words. "You're right. I need to find the right time and place to have that conversation with her. It's just... I'm afraid of how she'll react."
Sunghoon placed a comforting hand on Heeseung's shoulder. "I get it, Hee. It's not easy to have these kinds of conversations, but you owe it to both yourself and YN to be honest and open. Trust in your friendship and the bond you share. She'll understand."
"I'm afraid to tell her in person, though.” Heeseung contemplated Sunghoon's advice, weighing the options in his mind. "You think writing a letter would be better?" he asked, seeking confirmation.
Sunghoon nodded thoughtfully. "Sometimes, putting your thoughts and feelings down on paper can help you express yourself more clearly. It also gives the other person time to process the information without feeling put on the spot. If you feel more comfortable expressing yourself through a letter, then go for it. The most important thing is that you find a way to communicate with YN honestly and openly."
Heeseung sighed, relieved to have Sunghoon's support. "I think you're right. Writing a letter will give me the chance to carefully choose my words and convey everything I want to say. It will also give YN the space to absorb the information and react in her own time."
Sunghoon smiled, his eyes filled with understanding. "I'm here for you, Heeseung. If you ever need someone to talk to or help you through this, I'm just a phone call away."
Heeseung nodded gratefully, appreciating his friend's support. With a renewed sense of purpose, he knew it was time to gather his thoughts and pour his heart out onto paper, hoping that the letter would convey the depth of his emotions and the difficult decision he had to make.
He just hoped he had the time to write about everything he felt.
THIRTEEN.
The two months had swiftly passed, catching Heeseung by surprise. He found himself now adjusting his cap anxiously, eagerly awaiting your arrival. Graduation day had finally arrived, a day he had looked forward to with a mix of excitement and trepidation, knowing that it would mark the beginning of a painful farewell.
Heeseung stood among his classmates, excitement and nervousness buzzing in the air. The graduation ceremony was about to begin, and he couldn't help but feel a mix of emotions coursing through him. The cap on his head felt oddly heavy, as if carrying the weight of the impending farewell.
As he glanced around, his eyes searched for you in the crowd. He knew you would be there, a constant presence throughout his high school journey. But today, it held a bittersweet significance. It marked the beginning of a new chapter in both of your lives, one that would take you on separate paths.
The minutes ticked by, and anticipation grew with each passing second. Heeseung's mind wandered, replaying the memories of your time together. The laughter, the tears, the shared secrets, and the unspoken bond between you. He couldn't help but wonder how things would change after today.
Suddenly, he spotted you in the distance, making your way through the crowd. His heart skipped a beat as you drew closer, your smile lighting up the room. Heeseung's gaze never wavered from you, his emotions swirling within him.
As you approached Heeseung, you noticed the slight tension in his expression. You reached out and gently squeezed his hand, offering him a reassuring smile.
"Hey, Hee, are you ready for this?" You asked, trying to break the tension.
Heeseung looked at you, his gaze filled with a mix of emotions. "Yeah, I am. It's just... bittersweet, you know? Graduation marks the end of an era for us."
You nodded understandingly. "I know what you mean. It's hard to believe that after today, things will change. But hey, we've always managed to stick together through everything. I’m sure we will be able to do that again when we are in college.”
Heeseung's hand held onto yours, his grip growing tighter. He felt a lump form in his throat, and the urge to let his emotions spill over threatened to overcome him. He desperately wished he could make you a promise, but the weight of an impending goodbye weighed heavily on his heart. He turned away, blinking rapidly, hoping to conceal the tears welling up in his eyes.
But you saw right through his facade, your intuition picking up on the hidden emotions he tried to hide. Your heart ached at the sight of his struggle, realizing the depth of his fear and the significance of your connection. The thought of losing someone as dear to you as Heeseung was unfathomable. The bond you shared was precious and irreplaceable. Who would ever wish for that?
Before you could offer your comfort to Heeseung, the commencement speaker took the stage, commanding the attention of the hushed crowd. Your hand remained firmly in his, a simple gesture of support that spoke volumes. Both of you turned your focus towards the front, listening intently to the words being spoken.
The speaker's voice filled the air, carrying a sense of inspiration and reflection. They spoke about the accomplishments of the graduating class, the challenges faced, and the bright futures that lay ahead. It was a moment of celebration and reflection, marking the end of one chapter and the beginning of another.
As the speech continued, you stole a glance at Heeseung, taking in the mixture of emotions on his face. There was pride, tinged with sadness, as if he were already experiencing the weight of parting ways. You squeezed his hand gently, a silent reassurance that you were there beside him.
The speaker's words began to blur into the background as your mind wandered, reflecting on the journey you and Heeseung had taken together. From the countless memories shared to the unspoken understanding between you, your friendship has grown into something truly special.
As you sat there, surrounded by the buzz of graduation, your mind began to wander back to the memories you shared with Heeseung. The moments in class, the times you hung out, the events you attended together—they all flooded back, painting a vivid picture of your time together.
Each memory was intertwined with Heeseung's presence; his infectious smile and laughter were etched into every scene. The way his eyes crinkled into crescents when he laughed—that heavenly sound that never failed to bring warmth to your heart. It was in those moments that you realized something had shifted within you.
Fuck, you fell in deep. A surge of realization washed over you as you came to terms with your feelings. Maybe it wasn't just a passing fondness or friendship. Maybe, deep down, you have always liked Heeseung more than you realize. Perhaps it was hidden beneath the surface, waiting for the right time to reveal itself.
The thought of liking him, not just a little but a lot, was both exhilarating and terrifying. You couldn't deny the flutter of your heart whenever he was near, the way your smile widened when he was happy, or the pang of longing when you were apart. It all makes sense now.
How had you missed it before? Perhaps you had been too caught up in the comfort of your friendship, too afraid to acknowledge the possibility of something more. But now, as the truth unfolded before you, you couldn't ignore the depth of your feelings any longer.
As the ceremony continued, the realization settled within you, filling you with a mix of excitement and nervousness. Graduation marked not only the end of high school but also the beginning of a new chapter in your relationship with Heeseung. The question remained: would you have the courage to explore these newfound feelings and share them with him?
The answer was uncertain, but one thing was clear: the bond you shared with Heeseung was special, and it was worth exploring the possibility of something more. Graduation had become more than just a farewell; it had become a turning point, a chance to embrace the unknown and discover the depth of your connection with Heeseung.
With renewed determination and a sense of anticipation, you turned your attention back to the ceremony. As the crowd erupted into applause and the ceremony reached its climax, you couldn't help but steal a glance at Heeseung. His eyes met yours, and in that moment, you knew that whatever the future held, your feelings would guide you towards a path of truth and authenticity.
As the crowd erupted in cheers and applause, you joined your fellow graduates in turning your tassels, symbolizing the culmination of your high school journey. The air was filled with excitement and joy, and in that moment, everything seemed perfect.
But amidst the celebratory chaos, Heeseung's laughter pierced through the noise, drawing your attention. You turned, and there it was—the smile you adored, the one that never failed to make your heart skip a beat. His eyes met yours, and you couldn't help but feel a surge of emotion well up within you.
There was a tenderness in his gaze and a depth of affection that spoke volumes. It wasn't just your imagination playing tricks on you; he was looking at you with love in his eyes. The realization hit you like a wave, and a mixture of disbelief, hope, and overwhelming emotion washed over you.
Heeseung's tear-filled eyes mirrored your own, as if both of you were sharing an unspoken understanding. Heeseung's tears took you by surprise, and your heart ached at the sight of his distress. Concerned and wanting to offer solace, you closed the distance between you, gently placing a hand on his trembling shoulder.
"Don't cry, Hee," you whispered softly, your voice filled with genuine care. "Please, tell me why you're crying. What's wrong?"
Heeseung took a deep breath, trying to compose himself as he looked into your eyes. His voice quivered as he spoke: “It’s nothing, just us leaving high school.”
“Are you sure?” you asked worriedly, thinking there was more to it.
“I’m sure,” Heeseung whispered, his eyes slightly reddened. He reached out to retrieve something from his seat, clutching an envelope in his trembling hand.
"Promise me you'll wait a week before opening this, okay?" he pleaded.
"A whole week?" you questioned, a hint of impatience in your voice.
"I understand it feels like an eternity, but please trust me," he implored, his voice laced with sincerity.
Heeseung's request piqued your curiosity, and you nodded, agreeing to his peculiar condition. You took the envelope from his hand, holding it delicately between your fingers.
"I promise," you replied softly, your voice filled with a mix of anticipation and uncertainty. "I'll wait a week before opening it."
Heeseung offered you a faint smile, his eyes still glistening with unshed tears. "Thank you, YN. It means a lot to me."
Heeseung extended his arms, inviting you into a warm embrace that felt both comforting and bittersweet. He held you tightly, as if trying to etch the memory of this embrace deep into his being. You reciprocated, wrapping your arms around his waist and matching the rhythm of his heartbeat with your own. In that moment, your connection felt unbreakable, and the world around you faded away.
You two finally graduated from high school and are off to start your new journeys in life.
FOURTEEN.
As each day passed, the presence of the unopened letter weighed heavily on your mind. Despite being occupied with new hobbies and family time, curiosity about its contents lingered in the back of your mind. Heeseung's absence during this time only fueled your anticipation, as you wondered what could be so important that he asked you to wait for a week before opening it. With each passing day, the envelope seemed to stare at you, silently urging you to unravel its mysteries.
After an entire week of anticipation, the time had come to open the letter. Excitement surged through your veins as you hurriedly made your way to your room, a sense of eagerness driving you forward. You located the envelope you had carefully stowed away in your drawer and settled yourself into a seat.
With a mix of excitement and nervousness, you took a deep breath and gently tore open the envelope, savoring the moment of anticipation. The sound of the paper crinkling echoed in the room, and you carefully extracted the contents from within. Your hands trembled slightly as you unfolded the letter, your eyes scanning the words written on the page.
Hi YN ^^ !
This is Heeseung after a week! I hope you waited patiently, just as you always do. I know you keep your promises, so I had faith in you. If you did wait, as I believe you did, thank you so much. Now, let me get straight to the point, as I know you prefer it that way.
First and foremost, I want to apologize. Writing this letter is challenging, but expressing my feelings this way feels easier than doing it in person. You hold a special place in my heart, and I felt it was crucial to share this with you. I trust you would have appreciated that. So…
YN, I like you. More than just a little, it could even be considered love. I have loved you from the very beginning. However, Beomgyu was fortunate enough to be the one by your side, taking away any chance I had. It hurt, but seeing your happiness with him eased some of the pain. Please don't blame yourself, as you had no way of knowing.
All I ever wanted was for you to be happy, even if it meant I would remain in the background. So what if I was just your best friend? It didn't matter, as long as I could see you smile. When he hurt you, it made it even more difficult for me to confess my feelings.
I had intended to tell you earlier, ever since Mark's party. Did you notice the hints of 'I love you'? Because I do, I really do. It was my attempt to confess—it didn’t work out as you didn’t pick up on it.
If feelings weren't already complicated enough, my college situation adds to the frustration. I have been accepted to a different school than yours. I'm sure you're aware of that, but there are some things you don't know. I got into one of my dream schools, but it's located out of state. This means I won't be able to see you ever again. Not for now, at least.
I'm sorry for dropping this news on you suddenly and for not telling you sooner. I didn't know how to, and I despise seeing you sad. Losing Beomgyu made it even harder for me to bring it up. So I kept it to myself, which eventually backfired.
I find it frustrating that I have to express myself through this letter rather than in person. I know I may come to regret this decision, but it's too late to turn back now.
By the time you read this, I will already be at the airport, ready to depart. If you're lucky, you might catch a glimpse of me, although I doubt it. I anticipate being too busy to stay in touch through texts or calls, which only adds to the complexity of my situation. So, I must bid you farewell with these words. Goodbye, YN.
Please remember to keep yourself happy and never let that radiant smile disappear. It pains me to see you without it. And always remember: I will never forget you. That is a promise I will keep. Please don't forget me either, okay?
YN, I'm sorry that we couldn't fulfill our promises. I hope that our paths will cross again in a few years. If you decide to stay here, I will do my best to return to you.
Thank you for everything. Know that I love you, my YN.
— Heeseung, your loser.
As you read the final part of the letter, panic welled up inside you, and your eyes began to well up with tears. He was leaving you? Now?
You couldn't believe that he had shouldered all of this alone for so long. The thought of him suffering in silence while seeing you with your ex filled you with regret.
You berated yourself for not realizing his feelings sooner, but there was no time for self-blame now. Without wasting another second, you rushed downstairs, determined to reach the airport as quickly as possible.
You had to reach him before it was too late.
You had to say goodbye properly, at least.
FIFTEEN.
With a racing heart and a sense of urgency, you dashed out of your house and into the bustling streets. The minutes felt like hours as you navigated through the crowded sidewalks, desperately trying to reach the airport. Your mind was consumed with thoughts of finding Heeseung before it was too late.
The airport loomed in the distance, and you pushed yourself to run faster, your breath becoming ragged. Sweating and panting, you hurried through the entrance, scanning the bustling terminal for any sign of Heeseung. The sea of unfamiliar faces only heightened your anxiety.
Frantically, you approached airport personnel, trying to inquire about departing flights and destinations. Time seemed to slip away, with each passing second intensifying your fear of missing him. You searched for any information that could lead you to Heeseung's departure gate, hoping to catch a glimpse of him before it was too late.
Finally, a helpful staff member directed you to the correct gate. With renewed determination, you weaved through the crowd, your eyes scanning every face, hoping to spot him among the travelers. The sound of boarding announcements echoed through the air, adding to the urgency of your mission.
As you reached the gate, your heart sank as you realized the boarding process was already underway. You desperately looked around, searching for a familiar figure and praying that you hadn't missed him. Time seemed to slow down, and your breath caught in your throat.
And then, just as you were about to lose hope, you spotted him. Heeseung stood near the gate, his gaze fixed on the departure screen. Relief washed over you, and you called out his name, your voice filled with a mix of emotions.
"Heeseung!" you exclaimed, your voice trembling with both relief and urgency.
He turned, a mix of surprise and joy flickering across his face as he saw you. "YN? What are you doing here?" he asked, his voice laced with a mixture of disbelief and hope.
You rushed forward, breathless and overwhelmed. "I couldn't let you leave without saying goodbye," you said, your voice filled with determination. "I had to find you."
A flicker of emotion danced in Heeseung's eyes as he took a step closer. "But I thought... I thought you read my letter."
Tears welled up in your eyes as you shook your head. "I did, but I couldn't just let you go without trying. I can't bear the thought of losing you."
Heeseung's expression softened, and he looked at you, tearing up. “I’m sorry, YN,” he whispered, feeling himself getting closer to you. “I never wanted to leave, but I had to. You’ll find someone better.”
"There's no one else who compares to you. I can't believe it took me this long to realize it, but Heeseung, I like you too, a lot."
"But aren't you still with Beomgyu?"
"No, we actually broke up a while ago. It's just you and me now, Hee. I've had some time to reflect, and I've come to realize that my feelings for you have always been there. I truly mean it. Do you still feel the same way?"
Heeseung felt a surge of relief hearing your response. Part of him wanted to say yes immediately, but another part held him back. He didn't want to rush into anything and risk hurting you. He needed time for himself.
Your words hung in the air, and he looked into your eyes with a mix of emotions. "YN, I appreciate your honesty and the courage it took to tell me how you feel. I do care deeply about you, and that hasn't changed. But with everything going on right now—my college plans, the uncertainty of the future—I want to take some time for myself before committing to a relationship."
Confusion and disappointment clouded your expression. "So, you're saying you don't want to be with me?" You asked, your voice quivering with a tinge of sadness and hurt.
Heeseung reached out, gently cupping your face with his hand. "No, that's not what I'm saying, YN. Please understand that it's not about not wanting to be with you. I do love you very much, but I’m scared the long distance wouldn’t work out for us. I want both of us to be ready for this.”
Tears welled up in your eyes as you processed his words. "I understand, Heeseung. I don't want to push you into something you're not ready for. But please know that my feelings for you are genuine, and I hope that in the future, when the time is right, we can be together."
Heeseung tightened his grip on your hand, a soft smile playing on his lips. "Thank you for your understanding, YN. You mean the world to me.”
Heeseung's voice trembled slightly as he spoke, his eyes fixated on the sign of his imminent departure. "Could we share one last hug before I go?" His words were laced with a bittersweet longing, and you could hear the hint of pain in his voice.
The weight of his impending absence settled heavily upon you, and your heart ached with a mix of emotions. Tears welled up in your eyes as you nodded, and your own voice choked with emotion. "Yes, Hee... one last hug."
Closing the physical gap between you, you stepped forward and wrapped your arms around Heeseung. The embrace was a mixture of comfort and farewell, as if trying to capture the essence of your bond in a single moment.
As you held each other, the weight of impending separation hung in the air. You could feel Heeseung's arms tightening around you, as if he wanted to etch this embrace into his memory. The world around you seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you in that poignant embrace.
His voice cracked with emotion as he whispered, "Thank you for being here with me, even until the very end."
Tears welled up in your eyes, threatening to spill over, as you held onto him just a little tighter. The realization that he would soon be gone made each second feel precious and fleeting.
You found solace in the warmth of the hug and the silent understanding that flowed between you. It was a silent exchange of love, support, and the acknowledgment that distance could never diminish what you shared.
Reluctantly, you released each other, gazing into each other's eyes. The unspoken words and emotions lingered in the air, a testament to the depth of your connection.
As you watched him walk away, the weight of his departure settled on you. But amidst the ache, there was a glimmer of optimism, a belief that this temporary farewell was just a chapter in your story together.
As Heeseung walked away, his mind filled with a whirlwind of emotions, and he felt the need to distract himself from the ache in his heart. Seeking solace in the familiarity of his phone, he decided to clear his inbox before boarding the plane. As he scrolled through his unread emails, one message caught his eye, causing his heart to skip a beat.
His eyes widened in shock as he opened the email, revealing an acceptance letter from your dream school—the very same college that had been his second choice. A mixture of disbelief, astonishment, and a tinge of bitterness washed over him as he read the words on the screen.
Once again, he had a chance he would have taken but missed.
He was too late.
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