#i just really love hualian and see a lot of things in them that I see in myself as a queer young person just trying to find a balance

[clandestine-poet]

For context, before anything else, I myself am a lesbian.

Alright. So I don't quite know how to explain it, but Hualian really just has lesbian vibes. At least to me.

Being a lesbian is a lot of: "You girls must be such good friends!" "Do your boyfriends know you're here?" "How come I never see you two apart?" "Haha, two girls kissing? They must be best friends."

And look. Listen.

Hualian is constantly having people be like "You two must be such great friends!" from most of the other heavenly officials (until later on).

Xie Lian and San Lang at Puqi Village getting the "where's your wives?" every .5 seconds.

Xie Lian is constantly asked/talked about with "where's YOUR crimson rain sought flower?" or "If you are here, Crimson Rain is not far behind".

THEY KISS SO MUCH AND MOSTLY GET LOUDLY TOLD "there's other ways to exchange spiritual power!"

Also, there's something inherently powerful about a queer couple.

Being queer creates a space outside the norm. That unites us so much.

And it just feels like Hualian are the most lesbian-coded gay man couple I have seen in a long, long time.

[mikaela-the-slut-expert]

( Sorry for any writing mistakes, I don't speak English! )

Hello, it's me again! How are you? I was reading some of your Tgcf stories and I had an idea! ✨

I would like to request an Fluff Imagine (?), where (m/n) is married to Xie Lian and Hua Cheng, and has extremely beautiful long white hair!

The three of them were strolling through the ghost kingdom and Hua Cheng sees a beautiful bouquet of roses. He thinks it would look really nice on our hair, since the red would stand out against the white.

(M/n) and Xie Lian were looking at some things in another stall, when Hua Cheng arrives with a beautiful bouquet of roses. When (m/n) asks "what is this?", Hua Cheng just responds: "secret".

When they get home, Hua Cheng asks Xie Lian to help him put the roses in our hair. And it's a really cute moment between the three of them! 💗💗

I hope you have a great day! And I wanted to say that I love your stories! 🗣️💗💗

Roses

HuaLian x M!reader

You, Xie Lian, and Hua Cheng have been married for a while.

It's a loving relationship

But if there was one thing they love most about your physical appearance it had to be your hair

Long, white, pretty locs. That reminded them of the snow.

They think it's gorgeous.

Xie Lian and Hua Cheng spend a lot of time playing, braiding and running their fingers through your hair.

They're like obsessed with it

Well while stroking through ghost city, you and Xie Lian are busy looking at a stall with jewelry in it.

Hua Cheng on the other hand is busy buying some beautiful red roses.

He thinks they'd look gorgeous in your hair.

And it's like putting a piece of him on you.

So when the three of you meet back up and start walking home you're staring at the bouquet in his hands

"What's that for San Lang?"

"You'll see it's a secret baobei"

And you do find out.

When you get home Hua Cheng sits you down on the bed and starts trimming the roses stems and placing them in your hair.

Xie Lian helps too, careful to remove the thorns so it doesn't prick you

Once they're finished your hair has many roses in them, and it does look good.

The dark red popping from your white hair.

Hua Cheng is never wrong and he knew you'd be a vision like this.

[habizuh-studios]

me gushing about tgcf for... idek-

Haha, don't ask why i'm making this post when I'm basically dead, BUT- TGCF is honestly was got me into the danmei fandom. Two of my friends were gushing about it so in order to not feel left out i watched the donghua and it was the BEST DECISION OF MY LIFE not only because the donghua was actually so beautifully animated and the story was so captivating, but also because i watched it in dub and got to see howard wang. Which was great, obviously. unfortunately, i spoiled a LOT. And i mean A LOT of stuff after finishing season 1. I spoiled the ghost city arc, the 800 year wait, and some of Xie Lian's trauma before even starting season 2. And i didn't even have to wait that long for it- some people were waiting over 2 years!! which is crazy to me. The character designs are so intricate and beautiful in all mediums, including the audio drama (which is actually my favorite art out of all of 'em), which HOW?!??!?!? ITS AN AUDIO DRAMA?!?!??! i ended up buying all the books, despite spoiling myself a TON. And i don't regret it at all- i even convinced myself (not really myself, but my dead bank account) to buy the special edition of TGCF!! The official art is gorgeous, the pop-up is gorgeous, the books\ mark is gorgeous, and- despite all the spoilers, after i got used to the writing style it was honestly A BLAST. I finished all the books in less than 2 weeks. I stayed up late reading them- and my favorite part was finishing a book so i could jump to the next one. And my greatest surprise was i didn't even spoil ALL of it to myself! The instigator of the war between xianle and yong'an (if ykyk, hint: family) was such a surprise to me i had to put the book down for a good second before reading it again! xie lians occasional sassiness was honestly really in character, but still a surprise. I have seen some who didnt like tgcf because of the character arcs and hualian- which is fine, but as long as you have the right expectations going into the book, you will not be disappointed. Xie Lian is honestly my favorite. Sue me for being basic, but i love him. Even before knowing all the trauma, i loved him. (Followed closely are Ruoye and Feng Xin, so i guess you can guess my type which i immediately attach to, haha) anyway, in case you weren't looking for my life story, then here: watch the donghua of tgcf, then read all the books, no spoilers. Trust me. Spoilers ruined some of the emotional moments for me yet i still felt empathy for all the characters, which is kind of hard to do. (it hurts, dream on, there is no banquet that does not come to an end). then consume the fan content. Literally all of it. We are the most blessed fandom in history. You may look up some things to expect for tgcf, because i believe the theme is actually quite different from mxtx's other works! I still love wwx tho ;) ----- PS: I also love the parallels. I'll talk about one since this post is so long already, but here- I absolutely love the quotes. A lot of times, popular quotes are remembered when Hua Cheng is saying them, but when you read the books, you realize he's just parroting what xie lian has said... im biased and this isnt for everyone, and obviously his tone and context are wayy different + he has great quotes on his own- but I think it shows his love for him. or maybe i just love Xie Lian, haha.

[overshelter]

REVIEW: Heaven Official's Blessing

WARNING: Contains numerous SPOILERS, so CAUTION!

<< REFERS TO THE UNREVISED VERSION >> This is the author's third work and also her longest. TGCF, unlike SV which seems to focus more on the emotional and MDZS which focuses more on themes such as forgiveness and overcoming, seems to pay more attention to the feelings and relationships between the characters. The fact that the MC, Xie Lian, has lived for just over 800 years is definitely not something that can be easily overcome. Having lived, felt and related to numerous types of people over such a long period of time, it's completely natural that he would end up making extremely difficult decisions or be driven to almost irreparable psychological damage. In fact, I still find it incredible and truly admirable how he managed to overcome and move on even in the midst of many things. Even if there were moments in the current timeline when you can see that some of those wounds were merely treated, but never truly and completely healed. Most of his relationships in the beginning are completely in ruins, and don't seem to have any chance of recovery. But even with all that, he has still managed, not to mend, but to patch up many wounds that have emerged over the years. The other characters were also written and developed in a very human way, which was an unparalleled point of attraction in my opinion. What really stuck with me was that no one in this story can be described as entirely good or evil. Everyone walks a fine line between these two sides, fighting and doing the best they can for themselves, their loved ones and for a hope of happiness. All their decisions, actions and emotions are extremely relatable if you simply put yourself in their shoes without having any kind of prejudice in mind. They show that we can all reach a point of no return if we are pushed to the limit. Moving on, another crucial point in this story is undoubtedly the romance. It was developed in a very sweet way. So sweet that you end up melting with every interaction. HuaLian really is that fairytale couple, who have an enviable and perfect love, with a true sense of eternity. It's completely impossible to look at them and not feel like you're floating or have that warm feeling in your chest. To tell you the truth, I think they're the couple with the cutest vibe out of the three by this author. I'd say they're like that teenage romance or the taste of first love. That love that burns, that warms you, that won't let you forget it. A gentle love that makes you feel complete and totally welcomed. With this person, you feel like the whole world could turn its back on you and everything would still be fine. Because that person, that person alone is enough. That person you know and feel will never, ever abandon you and will always be there for you, supporting you no matter what. That's how HuaLian makes you feel. That's how they are. A simple, sweet and engaging definition of the word love. TGCF is also a very good story in terms of holding your attention. There are lots of things happening all the time, well-developed schemes, backstories to be discovered, new characters and a whole range of extremely attractive contexts that you can't take your eyes off. Everything was very well written and crafted, with nothing that seemed tedious or unnecessary throughout. MXTX, for me, is an author with a real talent for writing. Everything is very captivating and can hit you hard if you choose to give it a chance. Well, I'll stop here, as I feel I have nothing more to say. I hope you give this baby a try!

[taihua]

tgcf=bad writing (based on that reblog THIS ISNT HATE IM JUST GENUINELY CURIOUS I REALLY LOVE U)

Allow me to elaborate! It's my favorite book so I say this with all the love in my heart for the story and characters, but--

She needed an editor: there are large sections of the book that could have been cut without changing the plot. Like Hua Cheng trying on different outfits during the Brocade Immortal arc... I know fans like this scene, but it's obvious word-padding that doesn't contribute to the story or even contribute anything significant to Hualian's relationship development. See also the endless chapters leading up to Mount Tonglu. Bloated cast and characters not contributing anything significant (why were Banyue and Pei Xiu there except to address the fact that MXTX forgot about them after book 1???) and honestly, there's a lot of boring filler around this point in the novel. Reduce and cut.

Another thing that needed editing: loose ends not being tied up. The Brocade Immortal arc is a disaster, difficult to follow, and has no lasting impact besides Ling Wen being in jail for maybe two pages. It's never explained who created Cuocuo and why and Mu Qing's involvement is handwaved even though his explanation doesn't make sense. Xie Lian puts Banyue in a jar and forgets about her for an entire arc.

The descriptions are severely lacking compared to other danmei novels. I'm not a fan of 2ha but I'm reading it anyway because I love the way the author describes the scenery, the food, the clothes, the architecture... Thousand Autumns also has some of the most beautiful passages describing the cultivation techniques. I'm sure some of this has to do with the translation teams, but TGCF also doesn't really give much to work with? The descriptions of the Ghost City are good, but the rest of the book is just kind of like. "Xie Lian was in a room. He looked around and there was a table." versus other writers who are giving us sentences like "The celadon tea set gave an aroma of jasmine where it sat on top of the mahogany table and when he picked up the teacup, it was cool against his palm." Good descriptive writing engages five senses and I don't feel that TGCF does that successfully. What do we know about heaven except that the palaces are golden?

Anyway, what she does do successfully is making an interesting world with memorable characters, even if most of them don't get the attention they deserve, and she's great with dialogue and humor. Plus the romance is good; it's not rushed and it's believable that Hualian like each other (which you'd think would be a given in romance novels, but some of the ones I've been reading lately don't bother to establish that lmao).

tldr version: too many words that aren't giving us the right info :,I

[lanchang]

i see "hualian invented love" so often & every time im like these are the standards you're setting? either unattainably high (not all of us can be ghosties AND sculptors!!) or kind of a weird low bar depending on your point of view

trueeeeeeeeeeee yeah on the surface they have some interactions i really like and i do enjoy elements of the devotion and hc's ride or die nature can be charming when hes not being immature about it but theres not much underneath that it is just fantasy wish fulfillment and in that sense i really do get it like yeah it would be pretty awesome if a hot guy showed up and you liked hanging out with him and he already knew all the dark things about you that you were ashamed of but he loved you anyway and would defend you against anything. but also then you find out youre his entire reason for living and thinks you can do no wrong. and maybe youre like okay cool but also he doesnt really have anything else that he cares about so you never really feel like hes choosing you over anything else it kind of feels more like he has no choice at all..... and if you love him back i feel like eventually that would make you kind of sad like i wouldnt actually want that and in reality its a lot of pressure being someone's only or most significant relationship even if you really love them. also yeah they dont really ever develop or change theres a vague question of what hc's intentions are but xl isnt ever really worried about that and then they get together. its cute! but instead of them really going through anything together i feel like the backstory reveals take the place of any character development they go through because of each other. and yes hc actually does a lot because of xl but thats in the past and xl didnt know about any of it so idk its not very satisfying to me like oh it already happened.... and theres nothing from hc's point of view which could really have helped a lot. i guess it's nice that hc never loses faith and hope in xl but it might have been better if he did and then found it again. thats kind of what happens to xl and its way more interesting and its the heart of the story!!! yeah as a romance theyre fun and cute i do like them and i think they make sense in their context but there's a lot left to be desired

[wangxianficrecs]

❤️a warm coal in the hearth of our hearts by eccentrick

❤️a warm coal in the hearth of our hearts

by eccentrick

T, 46k, WWX & Hualian

Summary: No one truly likes a pitiful beggar; maybe they'll get a bit more money the first few days, but that quickly dries up. People like to see success stories, like to see the unfortunate dregs of society have smiles on their thin faces, and feel like they've helped in the long run. If you stay small, you'll only become smaller and blend in with the trash. Wei Ying is a good, smart boy. So he smiles and giggles and jokes. Most days he still goes hungry. Wei Ying is an orphan who fights to survive alone on the streets. But, sometimes, the streets give back just as it takes. (Complete, and will be updated as it is edited).

Mojo's comments: Ah, I loved this one so much! Widdle Wei Ying (about 5 years old) is absolutely precious and also terribly, terribly pitiful, doing his best to survive in the streets on his own. He eventually finds an abandoned old shrine where he can hunker down, and tries to pray to the god of it, but doesn't know how, and can't read his name, so no prayers actually get transmitted. He does manage to make some friends, though, one of whom is a very kind and gentle man who just says to call him Hua Xie. (Later in the story, little Wei Ying will bemoan, 'Do all grownups lie about their names and have more than one?') Wei Ying has been hurt a lot, by now, and takes a while to learn to trust his new friend. But the friend is kind, and takes things very slowly, and doesn't even introduce him to his husband for a long time. I was just. Really invested in this story. I pulled it all around me like a fuzzy blanket and gorged. It was everything I wanted. There are 5 parts to the story so far (most of them one shots based around Part 1, while Part 4 is a brief look in on baby Lan Wangji) and a 6th work is in progress. Lovely, lovely! It is so satisfying to see all of these wounded, flawed and loving grownups take a single look at Wei Ying and go, Yes, this one; we will love and protect him until our last breath. (The story is set more in the TGCF world, since that's where all the adults are. I think you'll enjoy the story fine not knowing much about them, since it's post-canon for that story. I have only seen the portion that's on Netflix (and read some fics), and knew nothing at all about Shi Qingxuan, and that didn't even slow me down.)

tgcf crossover, tgcf, found family, fluff and angst, humor, hurt/comfort, disabled character, ableism, implied/referenced child abuse, non-yunmeng wei wuxian, hualian, child wei wuxian, homeless wei wuxian, domestic, hurt wei wuxian, pov wei wuxian, pov multiple, accidental baby acquisition, @ecccentrick

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for this hard-working author if you like – or think others might like – this story.)

[akatsuki-shin]

Hi, @akatsuki-shin thanks so much for sharing your wonderful fanfics. I love to read them...🤩

I found your blog, cause I saw a lot of your JJK posts. Then I realized that you're also the author of quite a lot my favorite fanfics (sorry for being late in realizing it)....

Wow, now that you mentioned it, one of my twitter moot also like to post paralell between SatoSugu and HuaLian, somehow I felt it's not quite fit to their dynamics, and you worded them perfectly....

After reading your previous ask, do you mind if I ask you danmei questions? Can I ask your top 5 (or top 3) favorite characters from 'X'? And why you loved them? And your top 5 (or top 3) favorite moments from the novel? Thanks if you want to answer and sorry for the long ask....

'X' can be Qiang Jianjiu, Can Ci Pin or Mo Du, feel free to pick either one that you want to answer....

Aaaahhh thank you so much for reading my fics! 🥺 Hopefully I can post in the future for you to read hahaha

Yeah, I mean, for a ship to be similar to SatoSugu, I think one of them has to at least give off that Mom vibe like Suguru. Ngl, if Gojo were to marry Geto, he's not only going to get himself a wife but a Mom, as well, because he can be pretty childish and unhinged while Geto is there to make sure he doesn't run off somewhere. 😂

For your question, I'll go with Qiang Jinjiu.

My favorite character is definitely Shen Lanzhou. He's so pretty and smart. If he weren't so sickly, he would've been super strong when it comes to fighting. I love the fact that despite him often being looked down due to his looks and status, he ends becoming the most fearsome character in the story. Like, if you slight Ce'an, you may get off with just a few punches from him, but if you slight Lanzhou, you'll probably disappear that very same day. 😂

Next one is Xiao Ce'an. I love to see his change from wanting to kill Lanzhou on first sight then ended up becoming the most dedicated and loyal lover as the story progressed. Considering how precious Lanzhou is to me, I kinda share Ce'an's adoration for him and it just makes me happy to see him trying to spoil Lanzhou in every way.

For the third place, I'm not sure if I should say Papa Xiao Fangxu or Qi Zhuyin. They both definitely have a special place in my heart because of how strong and cool they are. Maybe I'll put Papa Xiao on 3rd and General Qi on 4th because I really love how we can see Xiao Fangxu's personality in Ce'an, especially with the way they both love and adore their partner. Qi Zhuyin is super awesome, though. Despite everyone's doubt on her as a woman, she proved to be a great and strong general (I think her troops are the most crucial there because she leads, like, 300thousand soldiers or something?).

I think it's pretty weird to put this one as a favorite character, but for some reason, I really love Ce'an's horse, Lang Tao Xue Jin. This horse always has the coolest description whenever it shows up and it's so funny when CeZhou had sex that night while riding the horse. The poor thing, LMAO. Also love Meng the gyrfalcon. I love them both. <3

As for my favorite moment, my number one is definitely when Ce'an resurrects the Libei Armored Cavalry after his father's death, that battle when they caught the Scorpions off-guard bytheir weapons and tactics upgrade in winter and pushes them all down to the Chasi Sink Hole. What I love the most about QJJ is how cinematic the battle scenes are and that one, followed by how Lanzhou desperately jumps into the sink hole to chase after Ce'an like a scene straight out of his nightmare is so uuurrgggghhhhhh 😭😭😭

Next one is the huge decisive battle with Hassen. Like, man, I didn't think I sleep at all until I finished that entire arc until Ce'an came and finished Hassen for good. From the very start when the invasion has just begun, to when the old commander (Yin Chang?) sacrificed himself outside the gate, when Fei Sheng rode all the way to lit the tower, when Tantai Hu came with reinforcement, and when Ce'an shot his arrow right before Hassen killed Lanzhou. I truly have no words; that must be the coolest battle scene I've read in my whole life.

The third one goes back a bit further to the earlier part when Lanzhou lets Ce'an go and locks him out of the city gate, so he could confront the guy who killed his teacher (Han Cheng, I think). But then Fei Sheng opened the gate for him and let Ce'an brought Lanzhou with him. That was so intense and the following hurt/comfort scene is just heartbreaking aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

I'm not sure what to put as my fourth and fifth favorite scenes because there are so many interesting scenes throughout the story. I do remember two scenes that I still remember to this day.

One is when Qi Zhuyin's vice commander(?) sincerely told her that even if nobody were to remember her after this, then he would be the one to always light a candle for her, and after his death he would make sure his children continue to do the same. Qi Zhuyin really deserved that recognition after all her struggles and this show of sincere loyalty really just strikes me in my weakest point hhhhhhhhh

The other one is when Lu Yizhi came to visit Lanzhou to see what kind of man his brother-in-law has fallen in love with, but Lanzhou has no idea about it at all. And then at the end, Fei Sheng inadvertently opened the gift Lu Yizhi left for Lanzhou and went "mother of god it's a dowry" or something. xD

[pinkandhobiqueen]

I need modern hualian adopting little Wei Ying abo au, but like. With main families as the most influential people in China, smth like chaebol in Korea (like, the Jins could be taking care of the jewelry business, because they;re rich, so they can have a bunch of mines with gold and diamonds all around the world and the Nies could be producing things for the military, like guns and stuff)

And Hua Cheng is this new, young money guy, whose hella successful. He's taking care of the whole "underworld", like mafia and stuff, maybe he killed his ex boss or smth, and he opened new, big company, whose making cars and technology or he opened a bunch of clubs and casinos, smth like that. And Xie Lian is an ex model, fashion designer, he inherited his company from his parents and it's really, really popular and successful

So to the main plot, Hualian can't have kids, they tried countless times and Xie Lian miscarried a lot of times, and he's in the hospital and Hua Cheng met little A-Ying in there, whose parents just died in a car accident. And they both instantly have a connection and so hualian adopts this little kid (background, before the last miscarriage, they made a deal with eo, that if it won't work out, they will adopt) so A-Ying is like they miracle baby and a few weeks later he's theirs and happy and a new heir to their companies

And it would end with Wangxian of course. Like. I can see that, maybe they're in the same school, falling in love and just being happy. And some angst there's too. Oh, and Wei Ying is a model for his dad's company! And a painter! And he likes to draw some of his own fashion designs! And his golden boy, whatever he tries he nails it and so he can play instruments and hey loves sport. And he's totally a badass, so maybe boxing or smth. And he has a motorcycle! But he's bad at cooking obviously and some other "omega stuff", like cleaning, being always nice and respectful (excuse me, have you met his father?) and polite and silent etc.

And so like. I can see a few scenes. Like, all of the big families gave max. 5 years till Hua Cheng's company fall and boom, it was like 20 years and he became even more powerful (and rich) than all of them together so they want him in their little circle and he's like "nah, I don't need you for anything, I don't want your little noses in my business" and they met in like their usual, favorite gentleman's club to "talk" and then San Lang's like "nope, bye, but the drinks on me", because his owns that club apparently (which they didn't know about) and so they talk with the barman and he's like " yeah, the new boss is more scary, but he treats us right and if you want some business with him, I suggest to go through his husband. What do you mean you don't know who that is, I believe your suits are of his project")

And another one! So they have dinner at Hualians summer house and all of them with the wives and the kids go there and E-ming's a dog (Tibetan mastiff), A-Ying's dog (because he loves them, he was there when he's biological parents died and there was a dog who stayed with him the whole time, before the rescue team arrieved) and it was his first request when he moved in with Hualian, and Hua Cheng was like "you know what, that's a great idea. My little onega son's gotta have the best and most scary fucking guardian when we can't see him when he's in the other fucking room, I'm fucking on it". And Wei Ying and Xie Lian have pet snakes! White Ruoye and Black Chenching!

And about the world building, the main families are very traditional and closed off (like Lans for example) and so they're like "fuck Omega rights" and then there's Xie Lian, who owns his own fashion company and is doing charity and he's very loved and influential (and a badass) and they're like "woah, how can his alpha allow him that" and when they meet they're son whose like "so you think I;m as pretty as my dad? Woah, thank you for the complement, but I'm adopted". And of course Jin Guangyao wants to have some connection with them so he's like "I know that my wife promised her bestie that our children will marry, but hear me out-"

And of course as soon as they adopted little A-Ying they changed his surname and destroyed all of the records that he was in that accident, so no one would ask him questions in the future, so he won't have to relive the trauma again, so the Jiangs don't know that Wei Ying is Wei Ying, because he's Hua Ying now and yeah. And I hadn't decide yet if I want to do Jiang Fengmian dirty, but maybe he wanted the little omega son of his ex right hand man to marry his own son but yeah, I don't know. Maybe. But for sure, Jiang Fengmian and Lady Ziyuan married just because they slept with eo and she became pregnant young. And I don't know what to do about the Wens, but I want Wen Ning and Wen Qing to be Wei Ying's besties, like. Yeah

Like, you don't understand, I have this in my head and I can't stop thinking about it and I want to read it so bad, but there's no modern aus with hualian adopting Wei Wuxian and I'm so desperate that I would write it myself, but I don't have this much time and skils, please someone competent do it. I wish fics could just appear themselves when we think about them

[accio-victuuri]

Novel Rec: Cherry Blossoms Upon a Wintry Sword

Synopsis:

Lin Rufei was the youngest son of the head of the Kunlun Sect. The disciples of Kunlun had been the sharpest among those in Jianghu, and were revered as legends among men. But Lin Rufei had a problem. If he so much as tripped, he would need to lay in bed for three days.

As Lin Rufei thought about whether he could salvage something from his ill health or not, he realized that a mysterious … phenomenon had happened to his body.

Author : Xī Zǐxù | NU LINK | Novel English Translation | RAW

I’ll be honest. I picked this up because a lot of the comments were saying the dynamic reminded them of Dianxia and Hua Cheng. So as someone who is absolutely in love with the novel TGCF and the characters— I had to see what this is. Plus the fact that it wasn’t long gave me the push to start reading it. I was pleasantly surprised by all the things this story gave me. This is exactly the kind of story that made me fall in love with reading in the first place. Why I continue to do so because I know there is one out there that’s just waiting to be discovered, enjoyed and appreciated.

I can see why people compared the pairing in TGCF and this but I have to say that Lin Rufei and Gu Xuandu have their own unique story. It’s beautiful and tragic. I think this kind of theme is common to novels in this genre and that’s why we enjoy it.

I’ll try to keep spoilers to a minimum and just mention general themes and warnings. ❎

It starts off fairytale/storybook-esque and I was intrigued. The translator did a very good job in telling the story because it came off almost whimsical at some point. If you like that kind of tone then you will like this. It’s about a weak prince living up in the mountains with his brothers who love him very much and protect him. He looks out from his window, seeing the Cherry Blossom tree he’s very fond of and he hopes it blooms. One day, a mysterious ghost appears before him and the two set off on an adventure. It’s a solid premise and you can sense there is some mystery and secret identity going on between the two.

Not even halfway in, I already had questions:

1.) Why Gu Xuandu is a ghost and only makes himself appear before Lin Rufei. Will he get stronger and have a corporeal body at some point or is he really from another world.

2. ) What is LRF’s power. It looks like he wasn’t weak to begin with and how can he regain it.

3. ) Past relationship between LRF & GXD.

4. ) Who is the Heavenly Ruler.

Aside from that mystery and the relationship between the MC & ML, I’m so impressed with how well written the side characters are. I normally don’t get attached to side-plots and all but this one flowed well. Even if it lasts for like 4-5 chapters, it feels enough. There is one that just left me so heartbroken and I still think about it sometimes— that’s how good it is. I’ve said it’s like a fairytale but it’s not the type that’s for kids. If you usually read novels like this then I think you have a higher tolerance for dark themes. But if you are new to this then be careful. There are no warnings per chapter so yeah. Tho I have say the unpleasant parts of it are not just there for the shock factor.

There is one ‘plot’ here towards the end that I wish was long, even just 4 chapters maybe so I can see how they did a certain task. I would love to read more about LRF & GXD’s journey on that. This is because GXD is a “ghost” character here he doesn’t appear as much as a normal ML would so I wanted more of him.

The relationship between Lin Rufei x Gu Xuandu reminds me of pairings i love like Hualian, and maybe, this is why people compare them. It’s a love that waits. A love that knows sacrifice. It transcends. Towards the last few chapters I wanted to cry because I want them to be happy. They deserve it so much. Their dynamic is also lovely especially when GXD teases LRF.

So there, I hope this story gets more readers because it’s truly a special one. 🌸

[kae-karo]

diff anon here, but similar to the last question cause i'm curious lol, how do you feel about bakudeku? as a romantic pairing that is, but also in general tbh

ahh hi hello dear!! fantastic question!! for context (x - on bktd)

i adore bkdk!!!! they are like. i mean don't get me wrong as much as i love every other pairing i've written for and plenty that i haven't, i feel like bkdk is one of those ships that's so canon-coded that i almost don't feel like i want to write for them? which is like a Thing for me generally, the canon ships in actual queer media (ie wangxian, hualian, victor and yuuri, etc) are just sort of like. what else do i have to say abt them idk? like i enjoy and appreciate what canon had to say abt them so i feel like i don't have much to add myself

anyway!!! lskdfjlsdf that's a lot of how i feel abt bkdk? like, am i aware it's not actually a canon romantic relationship? sure yeah ofc lmao but also like? their stories revolve so heavily around each other that they are critical to each others' arcs and development as characters, and while i have written a few things abt them (mostly before some of the apology/reconciliation stuff was out), i really feel like canon is saying a lot of what i personally would say abt them with regards to any kind of relationship

fr like whether they kiss or not in canon they are undeniably critical to each other, canonically would die for each other (sorry bkg dw i'm sure u will wake up soon) and would lowkey kill for each other lmao like i love them deeply as characters and how intertwined they are it's really a very intriguing dynamic that makes their canon interactions feel as poignant as if they were like. in a romantic relationship? not out of any downplaying of a platonic relationship between them just like. they are the most important person in each others lives i think, y'know?

ANYWAY lmao all of that to say that i really do love bkdk, i think they are like fundamentally the idea of 'you make me want to be better, both as a person and in what we're both striving to become'. i think they have that particular appeal of like. there is so much history between them, have they ever even known a life without knowing each other? and that becomes like such a deep and consuming sort of vibe that really colors all their interactions. like, who knows them better than they know each other? it's a really fun flavor to dig into when i'm in the mood, and overall makes for a really fun dynamic to see in canon as well!!

tyty for the ask dear!! <3

[liesonthefloordramatically]

you know that I continue to be feral for news of hualian fake dating and also I'll tell it right this time I swear.... but if you'd prefer a different one, oldseph character study?

(ask game over here)

Rowan, you are very sweet, so, guess what, you get snippets of all three.

Hualian fake dating: I feel like pretty much every bit from this that's viewable is in fact something you have already seen, but here we go anyway. At least half of this fic is Hua Cheng Going Through It because he's in a fake dating fic while Xie Lian has the entire TV Tropes page for fake dating pulled up in his mind at all times. I love Xie Lian and I love writing him from an outside perspective even more. He's so frickin' weird.

“I’m sorry if I’m prying,” Xie Lian says, not breaking eye contact, “but...I know what it’s like to be lonely.  I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.”  He smiles, a half-hearted, lopsided jerk of his mouth.  Xie Lian smiles so much, but so often his smiles are there to make him look harmless–a quiet, gentle, ever-smiling trash collector.  Someone easy to overlook.  Someone not worth the effort.   “I’m sorry that gege is lonely,” Hua Cheng says, because it’s easier than addressing the rest of it. Xie Lian’s gaze drops again.  “I’m not lonely anymore,” he says, and maybe there’s real happiness behind his small smile this time.  “I have you, don’t I?” Hua Cheng’s throat works, but no words come out. “And Shi Qingxuan,” Xie Lian continues, oblivious to Hua Cheng’s floundering.  “And Fu Yao and Nan Feng.  And Lang Ying and Ban Yue!  I have so many new friends.” “Good,” Hua Cheng says, far too fervently.  “Everyone should love gege.” Xie Lian looks up again, that strangely penetrating gaze.  “Mm,” he says, and then very quickly changes tacks.  “And you have your beloved.” Hua Cheng’s too aware of the proprietor furiously wiping the table behind them long after it should have been spotless.  “You are my beloved,” he says, and if his voice trembles, he can blame it on stage fright. There’s no blush this time, strangely–just Xie Lian watching him, just Xie Lian’s thoughts hidden behind his unreadable face.  Then, an apologetic smile–and Hua Cheng can see the performance now, the moment when Xie Lian chooses to make himself small and harmless.  “Right,” Xie Lian says.  “Ah, where is my head tonight?”

I'll tell it right this time I swear: the premise of this fic is simply "can I craft a fic that is custom-engineered in a lab to make Rowan lose it." (Slightly more serious explanation: it's a fic about grief and memory and iterative storytelling. there's a lot going on here, don't worry about it.)

You don't answer. You haven’t had to explain yourself to anyone yet. Lucy understood--or she understood enough not to ask. You were grateful, at the time, too scraped raw by Gyro’s loss to even be able to imagine retelling it. Maybe that’s why there are no words when you reach for them. Maybe you just haven’t had enough practice sketching the hole Gyro left behind. (Maybe it’s none of their fucking business.)

Oldseph fic: fun fact: I think I started this one before I started writing linear time is fake. when I say it takes forever for the words to coalesce I am really not kidding. the number of things in this one that are me going "I've connected the dots" about things that literally no one cares about is wild, but please have the opening of the fic (complete with my incomplete sentence because this is how my process works).

The morning after they’ve made it back to Japan, Joseph rolls out of bed (literally rolls, because the bed is on the floor, which is insane and he hates) with a crick in his neck.  It’s not surprising--as his grandson loves reminding him, he is old, and the bed is on the floor for some unfathomable reason and plane rides have always wreaked havoc on his body, even when he hasn’t literally wrecked them. If you kept up with your hamon practice, this wouldn’t happen, a voice inside his head nags, and he stubbornly ignores it, as he always does.  He could [whatever], but hard work and routine are near the top of the list of things Joseph can do without.  Still, sometimes hamon can be useful, especially when he needs to get a crick out of his neck. Joseph makes sure his posture is more or less correct.  He takes a deep breath.  For a moment, it feels like all his blood is running backward through his veins, and then a moment later the pain spreads from his chest to his torso all the way to his fingers and toes.  It’s indescribable--like liquid fire, like his skin is going to blister and slough off.  Joseph’s breathing stutters, his energy shuddering out of his grasp, and just as suddenly as it started, it’s over, and he just feels like he’s been sunburned from the inside out. The morning after they’ve made it back to Japan, Joseph discovers that being pumped full of vampire blood has some unintended consequences.

[birbfeeder2artisticboogaloo]

Getting to Know Your BL Mutuals

rules: answer the questions and tag some people. include the tag ‘g2ky BL mutuals 2022’ on your post so we can find everyone’s answer.

thank u very much to @yanwushi for tagging meeee 💚💚💚

What have been BLs that took you by surprise this year?

thousand autumns, 千秋!! my buddy talked me into watching the donghua, and i LOVED it!! really can't recommend it enough!! i even live-blogged it, that's how much fun i was having 🤣 genuinely it was SO GREAT, i really hope there'll be another season somedayyy aaaa 🥺

What have been BLs that you felt a bit disappointed with this year?

.......pls don't hate me. but. i don't really like mdzs or cql ;A; i WANTED to like it, u lot. I WANTED TO LOVE IT. i even bought the first volume of mdzs!!! I TRIED TO LOVE IT. but. alas. it just.....didn't suit 😔 cql and mdzs are both REALLY well done and there was so much LOVE put into them both!! i enjoyed reading and watching them, even if i didn't like the stories they told. in the end, i think it's just my own personal preferences that left me feeling cold afterward lol. so no hate to cql/mdzs fans!! ur fanart is gorgeous!! if i don't reblog it, it's just that i don't care for a lot of the characters or pairings lol 🤣

What has been your favorite BL this year?

heaven official's blessing, 天官赐福 !!!! i am OBSESSED. i am obsessed. word of honour, 山河令 is a close second!! but i really couldn't do without EITHER of them ;A;

Favorite BL/GL couples (not just of 2022)

fengqing!!!! fengqing are my fav but i love hualian too!!! ALSO RONGYE. rongye my beloved ;A; i love wenzhou and hanwenzhou (listennn i know that's THREE ppl but. i like them all ok. i just think they're neat 🥺) and i have recently been converted to yanshen!!! so we will probably be seeing more of that soonish-lyyyy...... >:3c

If you had to suggest a BL for someone what would it be?

definitely word of honour, 山河令. it's got to be my favourite bl drama of ALL TIME ;A; i've watched it twice thru to the end, and a few random episodes just on their own several times as well. literally CANNOT recommend it enough. it's brilliant. nothing has ever made me feel the things that woh made me feel ;A;

What’s your non-BL favorite this year?

i was really enjoying 'who rules the world?' a lot!! ....then i stopped watching bc i thought they would be taking my sweet feng chang away from me ;A; BUT i have since been informed that it's worth watching the series thru to the end!!! so i intend to do so!! SOMEDAY!!! 💪😤

i shall tag a few ppl!! but there's no obligation to play if u don't feel like it, so please don't worry 😊 !!

@sugarbabywenkexing @rainsfalling @minnarr @orchisailsa @stargrit and and and ANYONE ELSE who wants to!!!!! join us, friends!!!! one of us, ONE OF US >:3

[typicalopposite]

Well, hey there!

Welcome to my completely all over the place — that started out just as a Destiel but morphed into this multi fandom posting, self and others creations promoting, show/movie reacting, sometimes random personal life ranting — blog!

There’s a lot going on here.

Here you will find posts about my fandoms... which are as follows… going in order of how strong of a grip the hyper-fixation has on me at the moment.

The Untamed (WangXian of course, with a side of XiCheng)

Supernatural (Destiel… duh ☺���)

Heaven Official's Blessing/Tian Guan Ci Fu (Hualian... although I do enjoy FengQing and BeefLeaf as well)

Stranger Things (Steddie)

Shameless (Gallavich)

Our Flag Means Death (GentleBeard)

Good Omens (Ineffable Husbands)

The Musketeers (Portamis… or Flort if you’ve seen the reaction posts… and I’m also not opposed to Annamis or just platonic based fics of this show)

Starsky & Hutch (they don't have a fandom accepted ship name but I will call them Hutsky and (or) Starch anyway because they are canon names and I love them)]

The Witcher (Jeraskier. I have barely even watched this show and this ship has on my soul is unfair, unjust, and should really just be illegal)

Lucifer (Deckerstar... but I say this begrudgingly because Percifer -- as brief as it was in the show -- owns my heart)

Dark Angel (No ships really, but I'm also only a couple eps into the second season)

Other fandoms I'm less active in, or not active in at all but enjoy

Doctor Who (eventually I plan to kick this one back up into the actively active category)

Once Upon A Time

NCIS (McNozzo)

Psych (Shassie, but I like Shules...is it Shules... see not active)

Criminal Minds

etc etc etc... You see, like I said, there's a lot going on here!

Here you will also find links to my fics...

I'm on AO3 and FFNET

Here you will find a lot -- and I mean A LOT -- of posts about or in collaboration with @scripted-downfall aka Wench.

Here you will find reaction posts to shows, and if you are interested in that sort of thing we have a main blog for it right HERE

Here you will find selfish promo's for the discord I help run, and the one I created ( Raised for Perdition and the odd side of fandom) not saying you should totally join them but you should totally join them... cause they have been pretty dead lately...

Here you will find that sometimes life gets really annoying and I just need an outlet to vent about it and it has absolutely NOTHING to do with fandom at all.

Here you will find I am into many many manyyyy types of fics/art (almost all the things there is to be into) angst, fix its, mutul pining, abo, AU's, long chapter fics, short one shots, and mpreg are among the top.

One thing you wont find here is hate, or tolerance for hate. I can't promise there will never be fandom negativity, that feels almost impossible to try to avoid, and I am only human! I dislike plenty and want to talk about it. But just vile blatant unreasonable and unnecessary hate is not welcome here! Also Hurt/no comfort and MCD because... just why?!

[unforth]

Today I'm Thinking About...

...well, actually I've been thinking about this one for the last few days. We're on family vacation and I'm exhausted but whenever I get a minute and a little brain power I've been thinking about...

Hualian fantasy/soulmates AU, WARNINGS: manipulation, abuse, non-con, torture, kidnapping, permanent injury (read as: Jun Wu is involved, note that this starts as Jun Wu/Xie Lian)

(read more)

Xie Lian is living a rather pampered upper class life in fantasy ancient China (no cultivation and whatnot, folks are just rich/wealthy/possibly royalty, I haven't thought that part through that much), dreaming of his future life, what his soulmate might be like, all that loveliness, when everything goes wrong: he's abducted. Xie Lian never sees the person (he assumes man, because penis, though it's not like he was in a position to confirm their gender); they always wear white robes and a crying/laughing mask - even when they're hurting him and hurting him and hurting him, even when they've got him pinned down and are using his body while he screams and cries and begs them to stop, even when they are finally captured and Xie Lian is finally rescued.

And, oddly, from that rescue comes what he thinks (at the time) is a good enough turn to make the agony worth it, because he no sooner is saved when it turns out the leader of his rescuers is his soulmate. He's a handsome, dignified older man who shares the mark that Xie Lian must have manifested while he was unconscious - a curious pattern on each of their necks, shaded a color of blue so bright it seems to glow, especially in low light.

At first, Xie Lian is extremely happy with this match. Jun Wu is gentle with him, nursing him through his recovery, protecting him, soothing him when he has nightmares, holding him when he can't sleep, really he's a perfect, attentive, sweet husband. And Xie Lian, as vulnerable as he feels post-attack, is content to be doted upon.

Even when it means he doesn't really...go anywhere...ever...anymore. (It's better to stay home anyway - it's safer than in the outside world, where any stranger could be duplicitous.)

Even when his friends distance themselves and he's left with a social circle composed solely of his husband. (And if he misses Feng Xin and Mu Qing, well...he's tried to outreach to them, and they always make excuses, and then don't come, and...well, if they don't want to see him, that's okay. He won't force them. Even if their absence hurts.)

Even when sometimes Jun Wu pressures him into doing things he'd prefer not to. (After everything Jun Wu has done for Xie Lian, how ungrateful would he be if he wasn't willing to bend to give his husband the few things Jun Wu wants?)

Even when...

...and it's after several years of this that Xie Lian starts to notice that there are a lot of "even whens" and that there are a lot of times when Xie Lian gives and gets nothing back and that Mu Qing and Feng Xin seem interested in seeing him until the moment they meet Jun Wu's eyes and that Xie Lian is bored and...and...and...

...he's unhappy.

There. He's admitted it to himself. He's really unhappy, lonely, hurting, and yes, he loves Jun Wu, but he doesn't love how controlling he's become, doesn't love how their relationship has shifted over the years. Or maybe...maybe it's that Xie Lian has changed, and their relationship hasn't. Xie Lian doesn't need to be coddled any longer, doesn't want to be coddled any longer, and yet...

But after several attempts to broach the topic with Jun Wu, Xie Lian has gotten absolutely no where. Jun Wu won't hear him, and Xie Lian can't bring himself to be louder, more direct, more assertive.

Finally, after considering the problem alone for a long time, after failing at every attempt to force a change in how Jun Wu perceives him and treats him, Xie Lian hits on an idea.

What if, he suggests to his husband one day, Xie Lian started practicing martial arts again? He used to be an adept, but his wounds had left him unable to continue, and he'd never resumed the practice because...he wasn't even sure why anymore. And he wants to. He misses it. And it'd be some time with people who aren't Jun Wu, to go some place that isn't home, to interact as himself instead of as an appendage of his husband.

Well, maybe Xie Lian can't think why he didn't resume martial arts, but Jun Wu is full of reasons he thinks Xie Lian shouldn't. "It's too dangerous!" "I can't protect you when you're there!" "What if you get hurt?" "You know no amount of martial skill protected you from Bai Wuxiang..."

And five years ago, two years ago, last year, even a few months ago, Xie Lian might have left it at that. But he's stronger now, more confident in himself, more healed (and didn't he heal because of Jun Wu? Isn't he being awful, using all that goodness and energy Jun Wu poured into helping him recover and using it to make demands that will make Jun Wu unhappy?) and he wants to get out of the house, and so he puts his foot down. Insists. It won't be dangerous! It's his old training hall! Feng Xin and Mu Qing will be there, and so will other family guards and old friends. It'll be fine.

And, finally, with the air of one indulging a child, Jun Wu permits it: a few incense time a day, a few days a week, Jun Wu will escort Xie Lian to study martial arts again.

It's not enough, and far less than Xie Lian wanted, but at least it's something, and he can always do additional training at home. At first, Jun Wu not only escorts him but also stays the whole time, and everyone except the shizun avoids him, but after a few weeks it's more time than Jun Wu can spare, and Xie Lian has been careful - and it aches to feel how cautious he's being - and toed the line so that Jun Wu will have no reason to think anything untoward will happen while Xie Lian is there.

And so, finally, after so many years, Xie Lian has a few hours to himself, outside their shared house, and it's glorious. He'd recognized his displeasure, but the depths of it don't become apparent to him until he's alone and sparring with Feng Xin and he feels like he's come back to life. And his friends...at first their cautious, but slowly they become more personable again, and when they talk to him about what drove them away...

"We kept inviting you to stuff, but you always declined."

(What invitations? What declinations? Xie Lian saw none of that!)

"You made plans with us and then didn't show up!"

(What plans? When did Xie Lian ever miss an opportunity?)

"Jun Wu said that you..."

And isn't that what it always comes back to? As good as Xie Lian feels when he's at the training hall, he's starting to feel sick and uncomfortable at home, but he knows he can't let on to that - knows that if Jun Wu suspects for an instant that anything is amiss, he won't let Xie Lian go any longer.

And that Xie Lian is that scared of Jun Wu, that cautious of Jun Wu - that Jun Wu is that controlling and has that much power over him - that something so simple can make Xie Lian so happy and be taken away so easy - is the scariest part.

Xie Lian is really, really not okay.

Xie Lian really, really has no idea what to do about it.

As powerful as Jun Wu is? As rich? How could Xie Lian ever break free, and who would ever believe that he even needed to? To those on the outside, it's a fairy tale story, a dream ending, a perfect life. Poor little rich boy, coddled and loved so much he's unhappy? Boo hoo hoo. Mu Qing would probably smack him for even suggesting it, and even if he could get Feng Xin to listen, how could Feng Xin help? He's just a guard - a no one - he wasn't able to save Xie Lian from Bai Wuxiang (when Jun Wu was able to!) and Jun Wu is far more powerful (and dangerous, Xie Lian dares allow himself to think) and basically...it's hopeless.

But.

There is one glimmer of hope, one thing - one person - who keeps Xie Lian going to training, keeps him pretending, keeps him watching the narrow path between to gaping chasms rather than risk losing what little life he's managed to carve for himself.

His name is San Lang.

He's a young disciple at the training center, probably a decade younger than Xie Lian, barely of age, and oh...he's wonderful. Smart, funny, irreverent, and - in some ways best of all - unintimidateable. He's tall, his hair long and shimmery, one eye perpetually covered by bandages that he never explains and that never seem to hinder his martial skills. There's never a moment where he seems in awe of Jun Wu, never a moment when he stops himself from saying exactly what he thinks. He's also a fantastic martial artist, though he seems to be...basically no one aside from that. He's not powerful, not known, and even Mu Qing disdains him as beneath Xie Lian's company. None of that stops Xie Lian from spending time with him, though. Under the guise of teaching, they're together a lot, often one-on-one (or at least, as one-on-one as they can be, a pair sparring in a noisy room full of other people also sparring), and Xie Lian wouldn't trade those few minutes for anything.

What stands out to him most, as he reflects on their developing friendship, is a strange distinction he wonders if he's imagined. In his life, he's had many people who care for him - people who think he needs to be looked after, seen to, catered for - but he's never had anyone before San Lang who cared about him - wanted to hear what he thought, listened to what he said, laughed with him and for him instead of to indulge him. Even his closest friends can't compare, especially not with how strained their relationship is now. Xie Lian can't bring himself to explain that he did none of the things Feng Xin and Mu Qing think he did, can't face their condemnation of himself OR of Jun Wu should they really learn the truth; with San Lang, Xie Lian doesn't need to explain, doesn't need to face any hard truths. He can just...be. No ruined relationships heavy on his shoulders like the crumbling facades of an ancient buildings.

Just Xie Lian.

Just San Lang.

It's really wonderful.

And throws into stark relief how unwonderful Xie Lian's home life is. Especially because - despite early attempts to convince himself otherwise - things with Jun Wu are getting precipitously worse. What little control Xie Lian could exercise over his life is gone now - his ONLY leeway is training. What little attention Jun Wu paid when Xie Lian said "no" about something was gone now. And, weirdest of all, Jun Wu kept...hurting him? No, that wasn't exactly right. Considering how much pain Xie Lian had experienced in his life, calling the weird way Jun Wu kept clawing at Xie Lian's back, especially during sex, "hurting him" was a stretch, but...it DID hurt. And other times, even though he always used to prefer naked intimacy, now Jun Wu often had Xie Lian remain clothed, and he'd reach under Xie Lian's robes and claw at his back while fucking him ruthlessly - once leaving a bleeding rent, even.

But what could Xie Lian say? What could he do? He was trapped.

At least he got to see San Lang a few precious days.

And then he doesn't, because he can't - because Bai Wuxiang has returned. It's haunting glimpses at first, but when Xie Lian tells Jun Wu, Jun Wu tells him he's mistaken - confused - crazy - over-stressed. "Maybe martial arts IS too much for you," Jun Wu allows kindly, but Xie Lian refuses to stop going, refuses to give up himself now that he's carved out an iota of personhood again.

Somehow, he can't escape the feeling that his unwillingness to relent and give up isn't just related to Bai Wuxiang ultimately kidnapping him again - it's why Bai Wuxiang kidnaps him again. Thinking on that, wondering about it, trying to put together the scattered puzzle pieces and small suspicious he has, is his only escape from the renewed parade of awful that is being Bai Wuxiang's prisoner. While his memories of last time paint the experience as brutal, he doesn't think he's underplaying the past when he allows himself that it's even worse this time.

The knives are sharper.

The cuts are deeper.

The rape is rougher.

He hurts all over, and, when he thinks he can't hurt more, when he thinks things can't get worse, when Bai Wuxiang has him chained up, is using his body, is laughing maniacally while tugging at the cuts and whip-slices that criss-cross Xie Lian's back...it gets worse. Because, mid-coitus, Bai Wuxiang takes an heated iron and presses it to Xie Lian's flesh. He can hear the sickening sizzle of his own skin and muscle burning before he feels the excruciating pain, before he shrieks and shrieks and shrieks while Bai Wuxiang laughs and thrusts. It goes on forever, he thinks, before he finally, finally passes out.

And he wakes up at home.

And the same gut-wrenching horror he feels at being with Bai Wuxiang roils his stomach when he opens his eyes to be greeted by Jun Wu.

"I should have listened to you," Jun Wu says mournfully. "I won't make the same mistake again. I can't lose you. No more social events. No more strangers in our lives. No more martial--"

"No!" Xie Lian interrupts. If he loses that, he'll truly have lost everything.

They argue about it for the entire month Xie Lian is healing.

Mu Qing and Feng Xin try to visit three times that Xie Lian is aware of, maybe more that he's not aware of, and Jun Wu drives them away. Xie Lian is increasingly sure that his friends know something is Very Wrong, but there doesn't seem to be anything they can do about it.

Which makes it especially shocking when a deep, achingly familiar voice wakes Xie Lian from a mid-day nap while Jun Wu is off living the life he's completely cut Xie Lian off from.

"Xie Lian?"

It's San Lang.

"You can't be here." Panic has Xie Lian breathing so fast he's light-headed. What will Jun Wu do to San Lang if he finds him there? What will Bai Wuxiang do? What is the relationship between Jun Wu and Bai Wuxiang? Because Xie Lian can no longer believe it's a coincidence, no longer believe it's an accident...he knows Jun Wu too well now. And oh, he fears.

"Where else could I be when you're in danger?"

"Out of danger. Safe. Anywhere but here."

But of course San Lang ignores him, stays - but not in a controlling way, but rather in a gentle and patient one. He soothes Xie Lian, promises that his being there is safe, vows that Jun Wu won't find him or hurt him (as if that's something he could possibly prevent!), and...they talk. At first, it's about nothing, but slowly the topic spins around to what's happened. And while Xie Lian aches to finally pour out everything to someone OTHER than Jun Wu, longs to lay out his convoluted, ludicrous suspicions to San Lang, he doesn't.

Instead, he rolls onto his stomach and lifts his robe. San Lang spins around to avoid looking, but Xie Lian explains, "there are no mirrors in the house, and I need you to tell me something. What is on my back? What is there that would cause"--Jun Wu to hide that spot, to claw at it, he doesn't say--"Bai Wuxiang to try to burn it away?"

It takes a little coaxing to convince San Lang to actually look.

But when he does, he freezes, mouth slightly open, eyes wide.

"San Lang?"

"I'll kill him," San Lang vows.

"You mustn't!"

"What else could I possibly do in this situation?"

"What's there San Lang?"

Taking a deep breath, letting it go slowly, San Lang closes his eyes, turns around to show Xie Lian is back, and raises his own robes. Beside his spine, just above the waistband of the loose white underclothes he wears, is a tattoo - a soulmate mark - of a silver butterfly in flight. The ink shimmers when the light hits it, and Xie Lian finds himself reaching for it, barely stops himself before he touches inappropriately.

And it's while he's staring that he releases...that butterfly is in the same place on San Lang's body as the place on Xie Lian's body that Jun Wu kept abusing, that Bai Wuxiang branded over.

For a wild moment, elation floods Xie Lian at the thought that San Lang, San Lang, could be his soulmate! Yes, please, only him, always him, I'll do anything for even a single incense time in his company, I'll do anything for--

Then the elation evaporates, because of course San Lang can't be. Xie Lian already has a soulmate. He already has a tattoo. He already has a--

Dropping his robes once more, San Lang sits on the edge of the bed, his one eye overflowing with kindness and at least a couple tears.

"How could I do anything less to the man who's hurt my soulmate?" he says kindly. "When I was with you, I thought...but I knew it couldn't be, even though I'd manifested the mark. I wanted...I yearned for the impossible. But I misunderstood. It wasn't impossible, and it can be. The proof is there." He gestures at Xie Lian's back.

"What's there?"

"Mostly scar, now," allows San Lang. He reaches out, hesitates, hovers his hand near over Xie Lian's back, doesn't touch until Xie Lian gives a nod of approval. Their first touch outside of a practice ring, and Xie Lian can feel San Lang's hand shaking, revels in the warmth of the trail he traces. Closing his eyes, Xie Lian tries to determine the pattern San Lang is making...

...an oval...

...a second oval...

...a long stick-like shape with rounded ends...

...a butterfly.

"It's still there," San Lang murmurs. "I can still make it out, barely. He tried to destroy it, but he can't. He can't destroy you. He must hate that."

"He must hate me," mutters Xie Lian, and he knows it's true.

Not Bai Wuxiang - if there even ever was such a person as Bai Wuxiang.

Jun Wu.

And Xie Lian tells San Lang everything.

(and...I'm not gonna write more of this right now, in part because I haven't actually gotten further than this in my imaginings, in part because I just kinda don't feel like doing more rn. But I'll keep playing with it and see if I can't give it a satisfying conclusion. Even if I don't, you can assume San Lang is gonna leave barely enough of Jun Wu to fill a thimble, and then he'll give that thimble to Xie Lian and let Xie Lian deal the killing final blow, and that Hualian will ride off together into the sunset.)

[fullmetalpotterhead]

Hi, I am back with some more HuaLian thoughts. I was thinking that one of the reasons Hua Cheng fell for Xie Lian is that he CAN'T be like him, as kind and generous as him. And Xie Lian fell for him for the same reason. I mean, Hua Cheng seems like the kind of person who would not interfere in others' business (I might also low key be projecting here) even to help, even if he COULD try to help. The only time we have seen him truly selfless is when he ripped his eye out at Mt. Tonglu. And in Ghost City (that he built) even if he is feared he is also adored and respected (and there's also the fact that he took in Yin Yu, which happened off screen), so that must mean he cares about his city (though we don't see a lot of instances of that). I think all this, too, is part of why Xie Lian fell for him, that they love each other because they CAN'T be like the other (they wouldn't be who they are otherwise).

I think HC does interfere with others though? It’s just kinda on a case by case basis. He calls himself “unpredictable” and says he does it based on his whims, I have a feeling there’s more to it than that but I can’t exactly nail down what. (Readmore because long)

My very vague sense though is HC is full of rage and needs to fight something and so mostly (but not exclusively) he targets based on a criteria I don’t know how to put into words. Because HC does do a lot of killing, for whatever reason he seems to prefer tyrants. We know when the ghosts in Ghost City have an injustice done against them and use extremely questionable means to get revenge HC backs them and protects them from cultivators.

I don’t think HC is evil, I also don’t think he’s good. I think part of tgcf is the fact that it’s not really that simple. HC does evil things. He is decidedly not a “good person”. He also does good things, he’s loyal to a person he fell for for XL’s ability to show him hope and kindness in a world he thought didn’t have any. Which means HC does value goodness.

The problem I think is that HC comes from a place where most of his early life and even post death was filled with reminder after reminder that people can suck. People can be so cruel. HC didn’t like feeling like there wasn’t any good in the world though, no one would, he tried to end his life because he didn’t want to be in a world this shitty anymore. (Especially with a lot of the cursed child feelings likely playing a factor into telling him it’s his fault).

But even if he had decided to save everyone no matter how shitty after meeting XL I think it would’ve broken him? Like we see in XL how hard it is to try to be the hero all the time and how part of XL’s arc is understanding when to ask for help and when to stop trying to force your help on people who don’t want it.

But HC is intense. It would be so emotionally draining to love and care about everything and everyone without limits the way he feels about XL and I know there’s grey areas and levels of caring for others but I think HC honestly doesn’t have the same ability to detach when he cares about something so I think it is easier for him to do good things ‘on a whim’ or ‘because it was funny’ because otherwise it’s an emotional commitment? This isn’t said well but I have a lot of feelings about it.

Also I personally don’t think there’s anything wrong with being selfish (I don’t think you were saying it in a bad way but), I don’t think it’s incompatible with being good. There is of course being selfish and being SELFISH. Like there’s a difference between XL sinking under the weight of responsibilities and deciding to go back to heaven selfish and QR running over people in the street selfish. But I think being selfless is often dangerous, so I hesitate to use that as part of the criteria for HC doing good (unless maybe you were just talking about his ability to put himself first being something XL was drawn to because he didn’t have?)

But yeah I think do think HC fell for him because XL was beautiful, it’s what made him stop trying to jump. And then he fell for him when XL showed him goodness and hope and trust and held him and said ‘it’s not your fault’. And then he fell again when he saw after 800 years XL was still XL, sharing his food with a stranger and inviting him home and now HC was able to interact with him as peers in XL’s mind. To chat and laugh with him the way he briefly saw XL interact with FX and MQ before. And to get to know the little eccentricities.

Meanwhile I think XL’s progression went like: interesting friend good company for lonely touch starved god. Oh wow good friend is strong and looks kind of hot when he’s arrogant. Repeated shows of loyalty and devotion, HC proving time and time again he is reliable until he makes a spot for himself in XL’s heart.

I do think XL thinks it’s funny that HC will be openly rude, but I don’t think it’s necessarily why XL loves him or that he couldn’t be like that, they have very compatible senses of humor, XL clearly has those thoughts too he’s just been raised with more manners.

I think it’s less that they can’t be like the other and more that (in addition to genuinely enjoying each other’s company) they both remind each other of something they didn’t believe in anymore? XL is HC’s hope/goodness in the world and HC is XL’s forever/stability

Anyways I have no idea how on topic I stayed for that I went into a haze but thanks for the excuse to rant ❤️