#i know i know. different flamingos are different shades of pink

[synthaphone]

oh yeah- here's what shiny flamigo would look like if I was in charge

[spidernuggets]

hi hiii love ur stuff, may i req hcs about jason dating a super femme girly girl, like wears mKeup, wears bows in her hair, gets her nails done n stuff etc? Also being a civillian, im ngl i feel like he’d be super protective, but i just think it would be so cute and he’d be the scary gaurd dog bf lmaoo

been waiting for a request forEVAH

Jason Todd x GirlyFem!Reader HCs

I feel like he'd date a very girly girl who is a hoarder and does not keep things in place. Like you have a shit ton of different types of mascara, concealer, pink eyeshadow. And when Jaspn mentions why you have so much pink eyeshadow, you claim that it's one shade for different occasions.

You also have a huge collection of accessories

Hair accessories, rings, bracelets, earrings

And with all these collections, you tend to lose them all.

"Jason!! Where's my pink bow!!" "You mean this one?" "Jason- No! That's Flamingo pink! I'm looking for Lemonade pink!"

He would help you choose what nail design to pick from when you get your nail done. You like your nails a little longer than average, but Jason's worried that they would easily break, bht you assure him that you're used to them.

In the end, he chooses red and pink nails (to have your nails match with his colour too 🤭🤭), with white pearls and heart charms.

You tell him he can come back later because you'd think that he would hate to wait around for your nails to get done. But Jason is an absolute sucker for you. You can have like a 5 hour nail appointment and he'd still wait with you.

You like wearing short skirts, and you always wear shorts underneath just in case, but Jason is so paranoid. He doesn't want others to look at you. He always thinks he's overreacting, but that doesn't stop him from walking close behind you while the two of you are out.

Even though you have so many accessories, every birthday, anniversary, Christmas, and such, Jason would always gift you with a more expensive piece of jewellery. Like for your anniversary, Jason gifted you a Swarovski necklace that had pink roses around it. And you never take it off unless you're showering our plan to head out in a crowded place and you'd be scared of losing it.

I think girly reader would wear very graphic makeup. Like pink hearts and white sparkles everywhere or butterfly wings on the outer corner of your eyes. When you're unsure of a makeup look you wanna do, you'd ask Jason to be your model. He'd groan and let you try your makeup on him, but he makes you swear you won't tell any of his siblings.

And when your face lights up, thinking that the makeup look on him was perfect, you rush out to do it on yourself, and he thinks if your face looks like that every time you just put makeup on him, then it's worth it.

Sometimes, when you go clubbing with your friends, you'd assure Jason that you'd be fine on your own, but the both of you have a worried feeling in your guts. So when you leave, you're kind of hoping Jason is following you. And obviously he is.

So when some big, strange, older man comes to try to feel you up, you shove him away, telling him you have a boyfriend. But him being stronger than you, he continues to push.

Luckily, your bigger and stronger boyfriend comes to help you, reminding the weirdo that you have a boyfriend. Jason doesn't need to say mire because the man is running away like a scared dog.

Your friends swoon over Jason, but you don't need to worry about being jealous because you already know how much Jason is devoted to you.

Since he's already there with you, why not enjoy yourself with him while you're both at the club?

You'd ask Jason if you can have matching nails with him. It didn't need to be acrylic nails. You just wanted the colours to match . And unfortunately for Jason, he could never say no to you.

So he glares at his siblings, especially his brothers, when they try to question his choices of colours painted on his nails.

Whenever the two of you are together at home, watching a movie or something, he loves to have you sit on his lap, especially when you're wearing a skirt, wink wink.

You try to match outfits with him without him knowing. He noticed, of course. So he's wearing his iconic brown leather jacket, you're wearing your light pink leather jacket.

You'd teach Jason how to style hair, so every now and again, you'd ask him to do your hair for you, obviously decorating it with a bow.

Eventually, when Jason tells you about his alter ego, Red Hood, you think he's the coolest and bravest man alive, in comparison to Jason's initial idea of how you'd react. He'd think that you'd drop him, leaving him on his own.

But when you meet some of Jason's female friends and colleagues, you get jealous that they're more skilled, brave, and closer to Jason's occupation than you'd ever be. Especially when you find out that some of them, like Rose Wilson and Artemis Grace, used to have some sort of romantic relationship with him.

So, for the first time in a while, you start to doubt your position in your relationship. You start wearing darker clothes, darker eyeshadow. Hell, you stopped wearing bows for a while!!

Jason quickly notices this and asks worryingly why the drastic change in appearance.

And when you confess it's to be similar to his exes, he takes the black leather jacket off you, takes a bow laying nearby (there's always at least one or two bows lying around wherever you are) and places it in you hair, giving you a soft kiss on the lips.

He assures you that he doesn't need you to be or look like them.

Because it was you who he fell in love with.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This turned into a half oneshot for a hot second.

[twistedwonderlandshenanigans]

December Drabbles

Prompt 20: Feast Characters: FloRid (Floyd + Riddle) ------------------------------------------------------------- Riddle took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down. He and Floyd had been working up to this. Actually, everyone had kind of been helping in their own ways. Trying to unlearn following rules had proved more than difficult, and more than one mental breakdown. He couldn't handle it. It was a little embarrassing honestly, he didn't want to be this way, but years of fear of falling short of expectation made it impossible to relax his standards. It had been Floyd's wording that had helped but things in a new perspective, a more manageable pill to swallow so to speak. Rules were only made because one person in authority was scared of the consequences if they were not followed. Sure, when he was a little kid, the only exposure to authority he'd ever really had had been from his mother. Then Floyd posed the question, if Riddle had some way of babysitting a younger version of himself, if he truly wouldn't give himself the freedom he wished he had. While breaking a few rules would be painful, giving himself one day where he didn't have to worry.....there was no way he would deny a child of that, even if it was himself. Thus a breakthrough had been made, where "small" rules were not broken, but modified to be less constricting to start. During finals week, Riddle allowed students to bring their own coffee if they had made it themselves, but he didn't have it served at their Unbirthday party - Cater had been especially appreciative of that. His grades even showed it, as the caffeine had proven to help him concentrate while studying. Ace and Deuce managed to get Riddle to stay at the table he finished his lunch at by asking for tutoring assistance - meaning Riddle was too distracted to get up by the time fifteen minutes had passed. The next Unbirthday they had, Trey had invited Che'nya - so much for not bringing a cat to a formal event, but how was Riddle supposed to turn him away?

Some rules still were strict. There were to be NO chestnut tarts at Unbirthday parties still. And flamingo caretakers still had to wear pink. Croquet must not be played after 5:00pm.

But the point was, he was he was getting better. He had grown a lot in a very short time, and the people closest to him had done a good job of acknowledging the effort that went into that, even Floyd. Especially Floyd. So when Floyd had asked if Riddle would be ok with him pushing his boundaries a bit, he had agreed, albeit hesitantly and a little nervously. Against his better judgement, he decided to leave himself in Floyd's hands, knowing full well any questions he asked would only be met with 'wait and see.'

He had waited. Now, in front of him he could see a wide spread of foods, the smell making his mouth water. He could only assume that this was what Christmas dinner looked like at everyone else's homes. Every dish prepared with love from his boyfriend, who had slid into the booth beside him. Floyd gave him the slightest nod, letting him know he could start serving himself.

Floyd watched rather disdainfully, though he tried to hide it, as his boyfriend mouthed the amount of calories he was estimating was in each serving of food he put on his plate. He watched as Riddle struggled to make a decision between two dishes, before gently taking the serving spoon from him and serving him a portion of each, likely larger than he was planning on having. As if the slightly panicked and angry look from his goldfishie wasn't enough, Floyd also took the liberty of swapping his heaping plate with Riddle's, though he had been cautious enough in plating to not let any of the different foods touch.

Riddle looked up at him, his entire face a light shade of pink, his brows downturned, but not angry, just upset and confused. A small pout formed on his lips as he glared up at Floyd a little.

"You know I can't eat this. This serving size is too much, and far exceeds my calorie count for the day- maybe even the week! If I were to consume this I'd-"

"Be just fine. Well, maybe not all of it, wouldn't want you to get a stomach ache, but if you ate until you were genuinely satisfied, you would be fine. You would actually be healthier than the plan your mother made you follow. Ignoring when you're hungry ain't healthy. Your body has just gotten used to burning what little you keep in reserves. You've been malnourished for a long time Riddle. You've been lied to for a long time, and conditioned to think that countin' every morsel is what's gonna keep you strong and well, but it ain't. I know you can't give that up right away. I'm not gonna ask you to do that. But just for today, just for right now....I'm askin' you to try eating whatever you want, and as much as you want. It's just you 'n I here, nobody else has to know. Please? Please, I just wanna see you try...." Floyd's expressions varied greatly during his rant, but by the end, his mismatched eyes pleaded with Riddle's stormy ones.

Riddle had to look away. While he knew, at this point, everything Floyd was saying was true, it didn't make it any easier to hear. He felt tears sting the corners of his eyes before he buried his face in his hands, sobbing softly.

Floyd instantly regretted asking something so big of him so soon, reaching around his shoulders to pull him into a hug. What he didn't expect was for Riddle to panic, forego the cutlery and take a fistful of food from the nearest dish and shove it in his own mouth in an almost barbaric manner. He was sniffling, fat tears rolling down his cheeks and his face a light red, but Floyd couldn't do anything but watch as Riddle went on his own rampage through the food he had prepared for him.

Eventually Riddle slowed down, letting Floyd rub his back gently as he wiped at his mouth with his sleeve, then whined slightly when he realized the mess he made on his clothing. Floyd couldn't help but chuckle a little, using some magic to clean his boyfriend off as he pulled him into his lap, nuzzling into his hair as Riddle finally finished the last bite of food he had.

Riddle gasped as he sobbed a bit, leaning into Floyd. "Thank you.....I-I've never....I d-don't know what-...." Riddle took another moment to recollect his thoughts as Floyd just rocked with him gently, tucking his hair away from his face and cleaning him off where he needed it. Riddle shivered a bit, accepted the glass of water Floyd gave him and took a few deep breaths to calm down as he relaxed against him more.

"Thank you....for doing all this for me...and making me feel safe....even if it was just for a few minutes where I could let go of all the fear I had...it was very liberating...and delicious." He laughed, strained and tired as he snuggled into Floyd more.

Floyd giggled a bit and pushed away the half eaten food to put away later as he kissed Riddle's temple.

"Anytime goldfishie....I love youuuu." He bumped his head affectionately against the redhead.

He very quietly mumbled back before he fell asleep, "I love you too,"

[chickensarentcheap]

Sneak Peek :)

It's really messy, but oh well lol. I know some still appreciate seeing things :)

@tragiclyhip @secretaryunpaid @youflickedtooharddamnit @themaradwrites @munstysmind @ninjasawakenedmystar @thebejeweledwatercat @asirensrage @kmc1989 @karimac and anyone and everyone else who reads/supports

“Look! Look! Look!” Millie squeals from her spot at the dining table;  the top covered end to end in various Lego pieces.   Kneeling  on her chair, she holds aloft a separate baggy of building bricks;  her long, slender frame clad in a purple bathing suit, its front adorned by a lone brilliant pink flamingo,  and both arms covered in multicoloured bead bracelets.  “Where do you think these go?”

“Open it up,” Tyler suggests, as he stands across the table in only a pair of camo board shorts; his own hair damp and sticking up in several different directions, eyes covered by a pair of aviator shades.  The lack of a shirt gives a clear view of the now-healing bruises that mar his back and shoulders and crawl down the rear of both biceps. “We’ll figure it out.”

“You can’t do that.” Yaz heaves an exasperated sigh.  “That’s not how it’s done. You need to plan.  Figure out where you want to start first.  You can’t just jump into it and hope for the best.”

Tyler frowns.  “I think you’re taking this way too seriously. It’s Lego. It's a toy. For kids.”

“Lego isn’t just for kids.  Adults invest a lot of money in this. A lot of time. A lot…”

“Adults that don’t have sex lives, you mean. Because if they had them, they wouldn’t be so caught up in this kind of thing.”

“Adults who enjoy their hobbies. Who are into the finer things in life. Who…”

“Finer things in life? They’re plastic bricks.”

“These aren’t just any old Lego sets. These are intricate pieces of art. Some of these kits cost into the thousands.  People have whole rooms dedicated to the ones they’ve put together; replicas of the Eiffel Tower, the Roman Coliseum, the Titanic.”

“I don’t care about any of that,” Millie declares.  “I just want to build shit!”

Tyler nods in his daughter’s direction. “What she said.”

[jackalfurbyposting]

Furbies I Would Love to Have One Day:

(Or: My favorite furbies I found while browsing ebay and the furby wiki)

(images mostly from the first search engine results & the furby wiki)

1: A jester furby!

I mean, come on... They are oh so adorable!! The checker pattern, the pompoms, the magenta feet...But unfortunately I don't think I'll ever be able to have one since they're so ridiculously expensive 😔 Whilst getting a picture for this post I saw one going for over $600

2: Slightly more attainable, the Valentine's day Furby!

I lovveeee Valentine's Day themed stuff (despite likely being arospec but cough cough we dont need to talk about that.)

I also just really love pink . Look at this cutie pie!! I love the brown eyes on it since it's like chocolate... The green looks really good too! Green + pink my favorite color scheme ever...

3: The Flamingo Furby!

Once again . pink. I chose this image because it looks like it's scheming.... Wonderful beast. Another one that's marvelous with every eye color . 10/10 creature I love these things !!

4: The autumn/witch Furby!

The little hat??? Is so cute ??? Just . Adorable I love it so much. I prefer winter and spring(we're getting to spring wink wink) as seasons, but autumn does have some pretty impeccable vibes . Especially on a furby.

5: Angel furby!

This probably should have been higher on the list next to the jester bc i was like. Vaguely organizing them from like. Most expensive/hard to get to easiest but i forgot 🙏

Anyways if you know me atall you know that I. Love. Angels. To a concerning degree. And the purple eyes ? Best design choice ever ?? Looks fantastic?? Really otherworldly while still being cute. Obsessed.

6: Spring time furby! (Baby or adult)

The light purple is just so nice... It reminds me of the lilacs that bloom in a bunch of different shades of purple at my grandparents' house during the spring, which makes it extra sweet looking to me! It's kind of confusing with the baby version that apparently wasn't special addition- but yaknow what it's cute so it's ok.

7: Lime Green Baby!

I cannot express to you how much I love this cutie... little keylime pie lookin ass. Adorable. Also green is my favorite color so-

8: Sunny Baby!!

Look at how delightful this creature is! This is the one I'm most likely getting soonish- I absolutely adore the sunny babies! They are just one of the cutest things on beautiful planet earth to me. I'm so dedicated to getting one of these sweethearts once I move I already have a list of name ideas... (Any suggestions would be welcome!)

Before I move on to the last two furbs, here are some honorable mentions:

Confetti, Clown, Primary, Mint Green, Red wolf, and wizard.

9: Strawberry Milk furby!

Honestly I'd be happy with any of the 2005 furbies (the adult ones, not the babies... those were the only actually scary furbies lmao). They're all pretty pricey, but I think someday I'll be able to find at least one- I'd be satisfied with that. Also i really like this one specifically bc it reminds me of vanilla ice cream with red velvet chunks in it.

10: Funky Purple Furby!

Last but definitely not least!

Again- I'd be happy with any of the '05 furbs, but something about the green and purple here is so charming to me . This will probably stay a dream though, since the funky ones are even more expensive than the regular ones.

And that's all of my dream furbies!! It was mostly just an excuse to talk about the ones I like, i doubt I'll ever get my hands on most of them- but I had a lot of fun making this!

Anyway if anyone ever wants to talk about furbies or show off theirs you are absolutely more than welcome to dm me I will be over the moon!!

🩷 have a lovely day/night !!

[shortcrust]

Hello! I just want to say that I've long admired your writing style and am always so thrilled to see something new you post no matter the fandom! I was curious what your thoughts are on the expanded universe of your keep with me forward fic - do Eddie and Steve ever move back and closer to Robin and the kids? What does their life end up looking like!

Hello! First I would like to say that I cannot thank you enough for such a kind, thoughtful and generous compliment; I am so, so touched! Genuinely, I've been beaming for hours. I really enjoyed writing keep with me forward and I have a little festive surprise coming later this week, because I like to think it's a warm verse that suits this time of year, maybe. So hopefully you enjoy that!

As for where they end up! I think that in a couple of years the government eventually says, hey, you’re out the woods and not our problem any more, and Eddie says, great, thanks, I’m taking the house in the divorce. Maybe they stick around Waterloo for a bit longer; they like it, and they have friends there, and they’ve finally fixed the hot water. Eddie’s made manager and the pub stays the same only there’s music every weekend, just local kids with their angry new bands or aging dads with their old guitars from their old angry teenage bands. He only plays himself when they can’t get anyone else on the tiny stage, because he has someone else to sing to now. They learn to talk to each other, too. In the wintertime Steve learns how to put snow tyres on a school bus. 

I imagine that eventually they move. It’s sad to leave the pink house. (It’s still pink, even though they’ve repainted it several times, each a different shade - peach, watermelon, taffy and flamingo.) They’ve got good memories there. But the memories are friends sat on the floor, or evenings in the low light together, or burning food onto the kitchen equipment, and all of those can travel. The whole point of Waterloo wasn’t that Waterloo was unique, or special, but that unique and special things can grow wherever if you love them. 

So yes - maybe the next house is blue, and it’s down the road from where Robin’s sticking around UChicago to do a graduate thesis on 18th Century wind instruments. Maybe it’s yellow, right where DC meets Maryland, and they’re only renting there because Nancy’s doing a whole piece on the election and she can’t afford it on her own. I particularly like the one where it’s whitewash, a careful distance from Cambridge, MA, and sure Steve only collects a drunk Suzie from outside a nightclub at 2am the one (memorable) time, but in his eyes that’s more than enough for the whole place to be worth it. But maybe it’s just brick and has an awning and a downstairs bedroom for Wayne and it’s back in Hawkins, where they always seem to end up anyway so why not cut out the middle man. I think that wherever they go, afterwards, they know that you can make a home anywhere, with the right person, and also with - and within - yourself. 

[peppermintquartz]

Eames finds himself extraordinarily nervous at the prospect of diving into Hannibal Lecter's mind.

He wasn't kidding when he told Arthur to stay out of it. The first time they were there and he took on the guise of Will Graham, Lecter recognized the wrongness of the dream too quickly for someone who isn't trained in the field. Add to that fact is Lecter's former profession as a psychiatrist and a surgeon, both requiring deep focus and understanding of people. Lecter doesn't only know how to fix people's minds and bodies, he knows how to break them too, if the notes they have on him are accurate.

They're now in sunny Miami, the Florida heat pressing down on them like a thick, damp quilt. Arthur, bless him, is still in his shirt and vest, but at least he's shed his jacket and put on his shades (Armani, very understated gunmetal silver frames with dark gray lenses). Meanwhile Eames has pulled on an obnoxiously loud shirt, bright green with pink flamingos holding piña coladas, over his white tank top. Arthur tells him to sit in the back seat and stay there with the PASIV. Eames tries his best Midwestern accent and Arthur stifles a chuckle, which means it's perfectly terrible.

Anyone observing them (there are two agents in a different vehicle which neither Eames nor Arthur acknowledge) will see a criminal of some standing with his underling or bodyguard pretending to be a harmless tourist with a hired driver. They make their way to Coconut Grove, Google Maps guiding them to the address of one Dr Frederick Chilton.

The person who opens the door eyes Eames suspiciously until he greets her in Spanish, and then they have a quick conversation while Arthur waits for the agents following them clears the house.

"Ignatia is Chilton's caregiver; his bodyguards are David and Phil - ¿Quién es ese de allí? - that's David. Gracias, señorita, muchas gracias." Eames takes off his ugly shirt and pulls on a paisley shirt that is, thankfully, less neon. "Chilton's expecting us but he tires quickly, and we must not shake hands with him as he's still recovering from skin graft surgery."

They've read up on his condition on the flight over so both men hide their shock well upon seeing Chilton in person. The man is a patchwork of skin tones, from head to presumably toes, and it is a testament to his will to live that keeps him still breathing.

"I hear," says Chilton once introductions are made, "that you. Have caught. Just half of. The Murder Husbands." He breathes hard, his face twitching with the effort, and goes on. "Will Graham. Will try to break him. Out."

"We know that is a risk, which is why we're trying to catch him first. Is there anything you can tell us about them?" Arthur asks. He keeps his eyes on Chilton's face, as if he's not so mutilated that the mere sight of him will give a child enough trauma for a lifetime.

Eames is trying to commit the garbled manner of speech to memory; the skin grafts will be hard to forge, especially since he'll have to make sure they don't shift about in a dream. It's easier to look at the wretched man by thinking of him as a challenge than as a victim.

Chilton makes a wet, gurgling sound; Ignatia pats him gently on the back. It's laughter, Eames realizes.

"This. Is all fun. And games. To them." Chilton inhales sharply again. "He's already. Watching you. Becoming you. And he'll know. Know you. Better than. Anyone else. Even yourself." Chilton gasps; they all pretend not to hear the rattling wheeze as he fights to keep breathing.

Finally Chilton relaxes. "Those bastards. Have their own plans. Will Graham will find. A way. To push you. Or. The one you care. Most about. To the wolves." What's left of his mouth chatters and twitches. "All to see. What you would do. And then. He'll use that. To break you."

"Will Graham is deeply empathetic."

"Doesn't. Make him. A good man." Chilton's left hand flops up to point at himself. See? See?

Eames thanks Chilton for his time and leads Arthur out with a hand at his elbow. They will need to find a secure location to discuss matters. However, as Eames leaves Chilton's place, he feels as though unfriendly eyes are on him, all the way to the car, all the way driving back to Midtown, all the way to the hotel room where it's clear it's just him and Arthur.

What will Will Graham do?

[r4inwing-pride-parade]

The Golden Seafarer crew (so far)

Aaah yes! the Golden Seafarer! one of the shiniest vessels in the world, its crew is small but strong, pillaging other ships for gold and always looking for action.

-Koi (she/he/gem/coin) Night/Sand/Sky trybrid

The captain! a treasure obsessed but honorable dragon. She is cocky and loud and will do anything for her crew. Gem is surprisingly good at solving arguments and mediating which helps to keep her crew together.

Has the smallest twinge of nightwing powers, knows when the vibes are off

She looks like a Koi fish! light sandy scales with splotches of black and red. He has a black sclera and jewels, a LOT of them, coin always makes sure the jewels wont impede her flying though. 

Rapscallion’s ‘rival’ and absolute bestie, Separate from the Gilded Skyline but still looks out for them, he likes them a lot and the family they’ve got. 

-Flamingo (he/they/it) Sea/Silk hybrid

The muscle! is in charge of combat, lighting and sail making. He made the sails of the ship and due to his silk glowing the sails also glow! Koi adores it. Scales are different shades of pink, has sikwing wings and antennae so doesn't get near water. Has white and black scales along its face aswell as glowing markings. 

Extremely good at close quarter combat with no weapons, often using his silk and skill to immobilize opponents. He believes in the practice of honest one on one duels and if you challenge them they will not turn you down, and they will always keep their word.

It is Petal’s parent and always makes sure to visit, Petal is like the light of it’s life. And constantly makes silk things for her like blankets and bandanas

They’re very cheery! and very social, but he is TOO proud and too loud sometimes so that can always lead to altercations. He is Koi’s best friend and they are ride or die, they’ll do anything for each other.

-Knifepoint (he/him) Sand/Night hybrid

Quiet, reserved and bad at talking, unless he’s talking about metalwork or something he’s equally passionate about. Extremely serious and to the point despite his age (sometimes he feels like the only adult onboard). Despite being serious and a genius basically he is still young so he makes plenty of mistakes. 

A descendant of a volcano night wing, has no powers but there is a toxin in his bite he can use to make things decay faster (he is not aware of this) Has a poison barb but not a dark sclera. Scales are black with a purple undertone and he has purple eyes, has white scales at his claws and snout. 

The brains! He is all about weapons and metal. He constantly wears these metal claws and carries metal disks to defend himself. Probably used to be an assassin, is slowly learning to mellow out. 

Will probably add more characters! I still need quite a bunch of them, feel free to suggest. Big thanks to @thatonerainbowicewing fae’s really cool and basically inspired all this :]

[lilithloves-you]

I kinda wanna do this because glitchys doing it and I feel like I should post more. So credit to glitchy

(Expect mine are probably just gonna be randomly 💀)

So

Welcome to

Liliths Funfact of the day!

So

Uhm,

How do I start this?

Shit glitchy is better at this

Did you know that flamingos can be different shades of pink based on their diet? Yep! Flamingo chicks are usually born gray, but I bet you thought they were just one shade of pink but, Feather color varies with species, ranging from pale pink to crimson or vermilion. Caribbean flamingos have the brightest coloration: crimson or vermilion. The Chilean flamingo is pale pink. Though it can be rare, flamingos can also be black! Although this is rare it can be caused by a genetic condition called melanism, which causes excessive pigment to darken feathers. This is usually found in hawks and ducks but in rare cases it can be found in flamingos. So far only one of these colored flamingos in Israel in 2014!

[1000dactyls]

usually, when someone thinks of linked universe, they don’t think about katy perry. however, her hit song “last friday night” is actually a perfect linked universe song, as each verse of the song corresponds to a link’s adventure and individual struggles. despite its peppy beat, in this essay i will prove how “last friday night” is actually a song made for linked universe, a legend of zelda au created by tumblr user jojo56830.

the opening segment of “last friday night” corresponds with the link of breath of the wild, nicknamed wild. the singer describes the act of waking up:

There's a stranger in my bed / There's a pounding in my head / Glitter all over the room / Pink flamingos in the pool

wild, who struggles with his failure of defeating ganon 100 years ago in breath of the wild, cannot reconcile his “past self” with who he is. he, too, also wakes up in a bed in a weak state, as he starts the game with only three hearts. the last two lyrics also describe the landscape of breath of the wild, which is strange but wondrous as well.

the next verse corresponds with warriors, the link from hyrule warriors. as the singer continues (warning for mentioned alcohol):

I smell like a minibar / DJ's passed out in the yard / Barbies on the barbecue / This a hickey or a bruise?

the second and third lyric can be interpreted as the many people who arrive from different timelines to warriors’ hyrule, one of the problems he confronts in the war of eras. moreover, the last line also references cia’s obsession with warriors, as while she is an enemy in the game, she is also in love with him. thus it makes sense if she gave him a wound that is either one made from violence or from her obsession with him.

continuing in the song, we get the lyrics:

Pictures of last night ended up online / I'm screwed, oh, well / It's a blacked out blur, but I'm pretty sure it ruled / Damn

this verse goes to sky, as his legacy as the chosen hero—or in this case, “pictures”—end up influencing the rest of the legend of zelda series. he himself feels immense guilt toward the situation, which would align with the “i’m screwed” lyric. the “blacked out blur” also references his tendency to sleep, due to his reoccurring nightmares of the imprisoned, so the chance to sleep properly “rules.”

skipping a section of the chorus, we end up getting to the titular portion of the song:

Last Friday night / Yeah, I think we broke the law / Always say we're gonna stop, whoa / This Friday night, do it all again / But this Friday night, do it all again

this applies to the entire legend of zelda franchise, as the hero must bend the rules sometimes in order to complete his quest: sneaking into gerudo town, kidnapping the princess, etc. moreover, the cycle repeats, despite everyone’s efforts; “this Friday night, do it all again” would imply the beginning of the cycle once more.

now in the second set of verses, the singer talks about the issues they have with recalling the night before:

Trying to connect the dots / Don't know what to tell my boss / Think the city towed my car / Chandelier is on the floor

this verse applies perfectly to twilight, as he struggles to figure out the mystery of the hero’s shade/midna’s identity/why he is in hyrule castle’s dungeon. “don’t know what to tell my boss” can also reference his struggle to confess that he is the wolf to the villagers of ordon, or how to tell time that he is the hero’s shade. the third lyric also references time and twilight’s familial connection through epona: if time is the city and “took” epona, then twilight follows back his origins to lon lon ranch.

continuing on, we also get to the verse which describes the hero of legend’s adventures:

Ripped my favorite party dress / Warrant's out for my arrest / Think I need a ginger ale / That was such an epic fail

legend, who has gone on a fashion adventure in the game “triforce heroes” as well as having different sets of protective tunics, is also the only link who is technically wearing a “dress.” he is also the only one who has a plausible warrant for his arrest, as he kidnaps the princess in a link to the past; he also has a bad relationship with the hyrule knights. “think i need a ginger ale” would describe legend’s averse nature to going on another big quest, given how tired he is of all the ordeals he’s gone through, and “that was such an epic fail” could reference his biggest guilt: Koholint, which he failed to save the inhabitants.

we get another repeat verse in the song at this point. this one describes hyrule, as:

Pictures of last night ended up online / I'm screwed, oh, well / It's a blacked out blur, but I'm pretty sure it ruled / Damn

the first two lyrics describe his dilemma in zelda 2, where if he sheds any blood, ganon’s minions will be able to resurrect him. this is only due to hyrule’s previous adventure, aka “pictures of last night”, and he is “screwed” because of this. further, “blacked out blur” could reference either his origins in zelda 1 (getting the sword from the cave) or waking up the zelda in the second game. not only that, but this verse is also a pun; “pretty sure it ruled” can reference his hero’s title, and that he is also implied to become the future king of hyrule in zelda 2 by fulfilling the prophecy of waking aurora up.

as previously stated, the chorus applies overall to the adventures of link the hero and the continuous reincarnation cycle that occurs throughout the games. now we arrive at the bridge, where the singers chant “T.G.I.F” six times. this is a reference to four, as there are four letters for the four parts of him. moreover, much of four’s adventures revolve putting a stop to someone’s evil schemes, such as vaati. thus the “thank goodness it’s Friday” chant, or “TGIF”, would represent the end of vaati’s shenanigans.

this is the end of individual verses which apply to specific links of linked universe; however, every instance of “Think we kissed, but I forgot” in the chorus is time talking about Malon. the “I forgot” references his past relationship to her in ocarina of time, while the “think we kissed” refers to their current relationship.

so while our minds may not initially jump to Katy Perry when we think of linked universe, we shouldn’t be too hasty to rule her songs out. as “last friday night” has proven to be incredibly applicable to linked universe and describing each link’s individual struggle, thus explaining why it is the perfect song for linked universe.

[yandere-wishes]

Riddle’s Love Letter

My dearest (Y/N) (L/N) of Ramshackle dorm,

I am the head of the Heartslabyul dormitory, haling from the noble house of Rosehearts. I've dedicated my entire life to serving under the honorary memory of the Queen of Hearts and following her every rule. With every breath, I take I am to make both her majesty the queen and house Rosehearts proud.

And yet you, a magicless roughen, have hindered my goals.

Every single noon at tea time, I find my treacherous mind wandering over to you, instead of reciting the queen's rules by memory. At night when I'm to check the grades and progress of my dormmates, my focus is shifted to some fleeting moment in the hallways when your hand brushed mine for a millisecond.

What sort of accursed white rabbit are you? Distracting me from my duties and responsibilities.

You are just like that monstrous rabbit in the old legends, the one that leads curious, rebellious little girls down rabbit holes. The one that causes mischief and destruction where ever it goes. THE ONE THAT BREAKS EVERY SINGLE RULE THAT IS PLACED IN IT'S PATH.

YOU ARE A HEX (L/N)!

One that I just can't bring myself to annihilate.

Oh, how I dream of my magical collars wrapping around that delicate neck of yours, watching the life drain from your face, those meticulous calculating eyes losing their shine and closing forevermore.

See? Even in slumber, you do not leave my thoughts, never can I escape your dreadful presence.

Even in class, my last sanctuary of sanity you still haunt me. As the professors drown on about the day's lesson (I've fallen so far behind that it's bone-chilling to think about.) I simply sit there and picture swords cutting open your writs. Relishing as your blood spills over the white rose bushes painting them a perfect red. I do wonder -more so than I should-  what shade of red your blood is. Is it as dark as the skin of a poison apple? Or a bright as cherry frosting on a tart? In small fits of hysteria, I tend to imagine your blood to be as pink as the flamingos, I always let out a maddening laugh at that thought.

You have made it so I can not return to any of my yesterdays, for you see I was a different person than. Don't get me wrong, before you came about I knew very well who I was! I was Riddle Rosehearts perfect of Heartslabyul! But now, well I'm not entirely sure anymore, I think I've changed a few times since then. And you, so-called perfect, of the Ramshackle dorm are the cause of my madness!

Is it impossible to get you out of my head? I do believe it is, although sometimes in the dead of night my mind forges planes to end you, toss your body in a river and forget you ever existed. It's good advice, although I'm reluctant to follow it. I just can't bear the thought of never seeing that cute face of yours or hearing the heart-thumping sound of your laughter.

YOU ARE DRIVING ME MAD (Y/N)!

I've wondered down the rabbit hole!

Gotten lost in the queen's rose maze!

I'm at a fork in the path and have no idea which way to turn!

Or maybe, deep down I've always know which way to go. Go left, left for love, is this madness even called love?

Maybe it's best for everyone if I just put you on trial. Your crime? Stealing the dorm leader's heart!

And I find you GUILTY!

A sentence punishable by public beheading!

Although since you aren't aware of the rules I'll simply condemn you to house arrest inside the Heartslabyul dorm. Do not worry, since I'm nobility I have manners, I could never let a young lady stay unguarded amongst all these men, so I'll permit you to stay in my private room.

The trial will take place tomorrow, a half quarter before tea time. Don't be late! Although knowing you, you most likely will be. No matter I'll send Ace and Deuce to fetch you.

Tarts and tea will be provided as usual.

❤️Sincerely ~ Riddle Rosehearts❤️

P.S

You'll stay with me forever, even if forever may just be one second.

[13uswntimagines]

Prank Your Way Into My Heart (Alex Morgan x Reader)

Request: @Androgynousmoneyflowervoid: Alex Morgan is mean because she is scared of her feelings for the reader and reader thinks Alex hates her. Reader confronts Alex and they get into a fight and Alex tells the reader that she had feelings for her.

Pranks were a massive part of the USWNT culture. You had known that going in. You had accepted that you were most likely going to be the target of many of the team’s shenanigans because everyone liked to pick on the newbie. The baby, the rookie of the team as they had taken to calling you. To your surprise, the team had pretty much welcomed you with open arms. Krashlyn immediately taking you under their wing, and the youngins accepting you into their group with little fuss. 

Everyone seemed to like you. Everyone except Alex. It was like she had made it her personal duty to make your life a living hell. You took the first few pranks on the chin, smiling along with the rest of the team when you walked into your shared room after practice to find it plastered with sticky notes. Or when you woke up for practice only to be trapped in your bed by thousands of cups half-filled with water. Or when she had saran wrapped all of the pieces of your soccer kit. 

The pranks had been harmless, and in the beginning, you thought that it was just a tradition for a singular veteran to mess with their rookie, but then the pranks didn’t stop. You didn’t mind at first. You might have even secretly enjoyed the way Alex’s dimples looked after one of her tricks on you. Or how her cackle filled the room. You hadn’t minded being the butt of the joke if you got to hear that giggle. She was fucking gorgeous, and you may have had a tiny (massive) crush on the forward since before you even joined the team. The problem though was that the pranks hadn’t stopped. No, they seemed to be getting worse, and today you were truly not in the mood to deal with this shit. 

Team practice hadn’t gone well for you. You just couldn’t seem to get into a rhythm. You were groggy from being woken up at 3 am by your roommate Alex’s brilliant idea to dump ice water on you, and your sleepiness made it laughably easy for Emily to defend all of your attacks on goal. Your passes were sloppy and not even Lindsey’s jokes could lift your grumpy mood. You were incredibly relieved when Vlatko called practice and released you to all go change in the locker room. All you wanted to was to get back to the hotel and go to sleep. 

You ripped your soaked tank top over your head, tossing it on the bench beside you, and began digging through your bag in search of your favorite sweatshirt in hopes that it would provide some of the comfort that you were desperately craving. You groaned when you realized that it was missing. You dropped the bag, whipping around and glaring at the blue-eyed woman who was already smirking at you from across the room. 

“Ok, where the fuck is my shirt?” You growled, marching over to Alex. Her Cheshire cat-like smile widened at your rage, her eyes shining in the most hypnotizing way. 

“Why are you asking me, rookie?” She shrugged, bringing both of her hands up behind her head and stretching out her legs. God, she was enjoying the way your abs flexed with each annoyed breath you took. 

“Because you’re the only one who can’t seem to stop messing with my stuff,” You spat back, pointing your finger in her face. Her eyes left yours and shifted to the way your bicep was put on display with each angry jab of your finger. 

“What can’t take a joke?” She laughed, wiggling her eyebrows, proud that she could get this far under your skin. Sure there were more… pleasurable ways, but your adorable angry face made her hesitant to stop. That and the fact that you were almost 10 years younger than her. If she couldn’t have you the way that she wanted, well, this was a good substitute. 

“Not when I’m the only one who’s getting messed with,” You scowled, taking a step closer to the woman with each word until your finger is planted firmly in her chest. You try not to think about how her heart feels hammering against your finger, or how good she smells. You’re supposed to be angry, outraged. 

“Slow down kid. Why don’t you go shower first? By the time you get out, I’m sure your clothes will have turned up,” Ashlyn intervenes, appearing out of nowhere to wrap an arm around your middle and pull you away from Alex, who looks more amused than afraid. You weren’t known for being a hothead, but none of the girls had ever seen you get so pissed off. 

“No. Last time I showered in the locker room, someone dumped ice on me, and the time before that she doused my favorite sweats in paint. All I want is my shirt so I can get on the freaking bus,” You snarled, shoving your self-appointed team mom’s arm away from you. Alex didn’t want you here, that much was obvious. But you were here none the less and didn’t understand why she couldn’t just leave you the fuck alone. 

“I told you that I don’t have it,” She smirked, showing off her dimples as she raised her hands in innocence. She really didn’t have it, not anymore. It wasn’t her fault that you were generous enough to… donate it to a few of the kids who had snuck into the stadium to watch the practice. You lunged at the woman, the angry words coming out of your mouth as garbled gibberish, only to be stopped again by Ashlyn’s arm. 

“Alright, I think that’s enough. Take mine, and go get on the bus, and you stay away from her,” Ali said, with authority, stepping in between your very angry form and Alex’s laughing body. You struggled for a few more seconds, the team watching as frustrated tears left your eyes before you finally went limp. You shrugged Ashlyn’s arm off, pulling on the shirt Tobin offered you and huffed out the door. 

The room was silent, most of your team shocked by your outburst. You were usually like a little ray of sunshine, always smiling and laughing. They had never seen you so angry. Alex’s eyes were glazed over, staring into space. Who the fuck gave you the right to look so hot and adorable at the same time when you were pissed?

“You know, I think you’d have better luck if you just told her how you felt instead of acting like a middle school boy,” Kelley said after a few minutes, settling down beside the star forward and pulling her out of her thoughts. She sighed. She didn’t like that she had hurt you, but finally admitting her feelings for you was too terrifying to even consider. Yes, she was acting like a child, but having you this way was better than having you avoid her because she freaked you out. Was it healthy to push you away to avoid rejection? No. But if she never told you how she felt, then you could never turn her down. 

“But she’s so cute when she’s mad, and have you seen those abs,” Alex murmured, biting her lip. Kelley shook her head. How oblivious could two people be? The two of you were always sharing longing glances, and you kept trying to be Alex’s friend, despite her horrible treatment of you. You both stared at each other like lovesick puppies, and she was tired of you getting hurt. 

“I’m sure she’d willingly show them to you if you asked, rather than destroy her property,” Kelley grumbled, and the rest of the room snorted. Just because the two of you were oblivious to each other didn’t mean the rest of the team followed suit. If they could just convince Alex to get over her hesitance due to the age issue, or the fear of rejection, then the entire team dynamic would be better off. They really needed to get rid of the sexual tension that followed the two of you as it was always a bit distracting.

“Hm…” Alex hummed back noncommittally. Why would you pick her over someone like Mal, or Emily or any one of the other youngins you were always hanging with? In her mind you wouldn’t, and why would she need to tell you about her feelings if the plan was already set into place for her to see your abs again. The team shared worried looks, knowing what Alex’s demeanor meant, they could only hope that it wasn’t as bad as the time she had turned all of your t-shirts into crop tops.  

*****

They would find out exactly what she had done not even two hours later. Most of the team was gathered in the conference room munching on whatever food the staff had put out for them. They hoped that excitement for the day was done, but Alex’s smirk and the bouncing of her leg told them that it wasn’t.

You had avoided everyone when you arrived at the hotel, longing for a hot shower and a good nap before you had to deal with the fallout of your outburst. Everything had been going fine until you caught a glance at yourself in the steamy mirror. Your normal Y/H/C was far from its normal shade. 

“What the actual fuck Alex,” You yelled, slamming open the dining-room door, and storming up the women in question. She took in your very angry, very wet form staring down at her clad in nothing but a sports bra and some basketball shorts. She could only assume that you had seen your hair before you had the chance to put on a shirt. 

“How do you know that it was me?” She smiled up innocently at you, biting her lip at the fact that your abs (which just happened to have little water droplets dripping down them) were mere inches from her face. 

“Because who the fuck else would think dying my hair pink was a good idea, and you’re the only one that had the other key to our room” You spat, clacking your teeth and lifting a strand of the hair in question.

“Well, you did say that you needed to liven it up a little bit,” She shrugged. Maybe it was more of the fact that she had thought you would look better in pink, the same shade of pink as her favorite pre-wrap. At least she hadn’t been wrong. 

“That’s not what I meant and you know it,” You glowered, running a frustrated hand through you now ruined hair. You had wanted to do something cool, like different shades of blue and teal, but now you looked like a fucking flamingo. 

“Mmm, did I?” She challenged and her interest peaking as you turned your glare to the floor. It seemed that all Alex wanted was to humiliate you in front of the world, and now she had gotten her wish. You shook your head, it was fine when the pranks were kept within the team, but this was so much farther beyond that. There would be no way for you to hide this from the media, and you weren’t looking forward to their mean comments. 

“You know what, I don’t know what your fucking problem is with me, but I’m sick of you fucking picking on me,” You growled, channeling your frustration and raising to your full height. She may never feel the way you felt about her, but that didn’t give her the right to be an asshole.  

“I don’t have a problem,” She denied, but the gloating smile on her face told you differently. 

“I’d beg to differ. What did I ever do to you to make you fucking hate me?” You finally broke, unable to hold back your frustrated tears any longer. You opened your mouth to speak, but no words would come out. Your fingers tugged roughly at your hair. 

“I don’t hate you Y/n,” Alex said softly, her joyful demeanor crumbling, her shoulders slumping. She hadn’t meant to push this far, it had just been so hard to stop. 

“Do you just think I’m not good enough? I swear that I won’t bring the team down. I can get-” You started to ramble, your tears making it very difficult to understand what you were saying. You were so caught up in your thoughts that you failed to notice the soft hands gripping your shoulders or the fact that Alex’s face was getting very close to your own. 

Her lips touched yours midway through your self deprecating rant, your eyes growing wide when her soft flesh touched your own, before slamming shut and remembering that it was probably a good idea to kiss her back. And you did. Your lips moved in harmony, a symphony of fireworks exploding behind your eyes.

You had dreamed of this moment for as long as you would remember, praying that one day you would finally be given the chance to fight for the woman’s heart. You had all but given up hope that she felt the way you did, but with her tongue gently probing your bottom lip, you couldn’t help the butterflies that filled your chest. Her hands migrated from your shoulders to the baby hairs at the back of your neck, pulling your closer, while yours found the curve of her hips. 

Air became an issue within seconds, and you reluctantly pulled away, taking in large gulping breaths, and instead of taking a step back, Alex followed you, connecting your foreheads. 

“What?” You asked breathlessly, trying to ignore both the loud wolf whistles of your teammates and the heat from your blushing cheeks. 

“I’m was being an ass, and I’m sorry,” “It’s just, I didn’t know how to tell you. You’re just so young, and to be honest, the way you make me feel scares the crap out of me,” She confessed, and you could see the honesty and insecurity in her bright blue eyes. You placed a sweet kiss on her lips, realizing that you were slowly becoming addicted to them. 

“So you thought it was better to push me away then to tell me that you liked me?” It was your turn to smirk at her. 

“It’s not an excuse. I’m so sorry that I hurt you, and if you hated me, I would understand,” She mumbled, leaning peck your lips this time, and you huffed. 

“I don’t hate you. I’ve actually had a crush on you for the longest time…” You giggled, pinching the skin that was exposed by her shirt riding up. You would never admit it, but you had plastered your walls with posters of the women’s national team growing up, and you may or may not have had a propensity doodle your favorite players number all over all of your notebooks. 

“Hmm,” Alex hummed against your lips, wondering exactly how long ‘the longest time’ was, and thanking her lucky stars that she hadn’t entirely fucked up her chances with you. 

“Does this mean you’ll stop messing with me,” You whined, pulling away from her face and burying your nose in her neck. 

“As long as I don’t have to steal your stuff anymore to see those abs,” She giggled at your adorableness, running her hands through your newly pink hair. You sighed in contentment into her neck. 

“Why don’t you buy me dinner first,” You muttered sarcastically raising your eyebrow and, leaning back to finally look her in the eyes. 

“I think that can be arranged,” She shot you a wide smile, her cheeks turning blood red when your teammates started cheering again, bantering about how you two finally got your shit together. 

“I can’t believe Alex basically pranked her way into your pants,’ Kelley snorted after a few minutes, and you couldn’t help the cackle that left your lips. You were smooth, but no one was smoother than Alex. Hopefully, she could woo you as well as she could prank you.

[bebepac]

Seeing Double

This is chapter 7 of Just the Way You Are.  To catch up on what you’ve missed please click:  Just the Way You Are Masterlist

Original Post date: 2/24/2021

The Book:  Prerfect Match x TRR

Pairing:  Hayden and Kai /  TRR MC is single-ish

Word Count: 3192

Warnings:  Profanity

Summary: More of Hayden and Liam’s friendship is revealed.  Liam and Riley have breakfast together for the first time... alone.  The squad goes out to dinner.  

Taylor, Sal, Jaiden, and Nico are my own characters.  All others belong to Pixelberry.  

A/N: Working on giving my masterlist a face lift, here’s one of fruits of my labor.  I hope you like it.    I really don’t have a song for this one, so i’m not even going to bother picking one.  

A/2:  In this AU Jaiden is not the older brother, he is the younger brother.  Jason and Ren Brooks after failing to conceive adopted twin girls and seven years later.  Jaiden arrived!

“You have an identical twin sister?”  

“Yes.”

“Why didn’t you mention that?”  

“She’s my sister, and we share the same face.  That's it. Do you mention your sibling that doesn’t?”  

“No.. but…”

“People get so drawn into the fact that we look alike, that they don’t realize that we’re still  completely different people with different personalities.  Yes we share a face… but that’s where the similarities end. People really start asking ten thousand questions when you say, you have an identical twin."

Riley laughed in her direction.

"Being that she's giving you the finger right now, looks like the two of you really hit it off. Come on let's smooth this over. I promise her bark is worse than her bite."

Riley grabbed his hand pulling him over to meet her sister. All Liam could think is that Riley was holding his hand.

Taylor immediately rolled her eyes.

"C’mon Tay be nice.”

“Why? He has corny jokes Riley. My God!!! They’re horrible.”

“You’re just a comedy snob because Max is a comedian.”  

She smirked at Riley. Riley smirked back identically.

“Liam is a nice guy Taylor, if you give him a chance. I gave Maxwell a chance.”  

“I’m engaged to Maxwell. Are you trying to get engaged to him Riley?”

Liam let out a surprised cough.

“In case you don’t speak in cough, that means no Ri.”

“That means, we just started hanging out and you’re trying to throw us down the aisle Taylor, overbearing much?”    

Riley raised her eyebrow, crossing her arms over her arms over her chest.  Riley tapped her foot impatiently.  

“Finnnnneeeeeee!!!!  You win.  Okay, You win.  Don’t do that thing like Mom does it drives me crazy."

Taylor took a sip of her coffee like she was taking a shot and then smiled sweetly at Liam.

"Hi Liam, I'm Taylor, Riley's sister. Nice to meet you."

Liam was impressed.

"That's all I ask. Thank you Taylor."

She saluted Riley. "Okay Mom."

"Come on Liam." She grabbed his hand again pulling him away from her.

They went to sit at a table away from Taylor. Liam was  relieved. Though he thought Riley had the situation handled with her sister.

"Sorry I am late. Chance told me at the last second, he couldn't make it then I had to throw something on."

Riley smiled, so did Liam.

He glanced at Riley. If this was her just throwing clothes on, his heart ached to see what she looked like when really tried to look nice.

Riley looked amazing. Her hair and makeup were done. She was wearing a blue retro dress with pink flamingos on it, and her signature pink flip flops.  Riley looked beautiful.

"Well if you rushed, Riley, I can't tell. I think you look beautiful."

Riley smiled biting her lip and her cheeks turned pink. She glanced down at the menu.

Riley was blushing!

"You make sure you let Chance know, I'm sad I couldn't hang out with him today. But I'm glad you're here Riley."

They ordered their food. Another Greek omelet for Riley. Liam ordered a different breakfast sampler.

When the food came he noticed as he ate Riley kept glancing at his plate.  

“Want to try some?”  Liam asked.  

“No.. I’m fine.”  Riley said hesitantly.  They continued talking.  It almost felt like a date to Liam.  

When he glanced up, Riley was eyeing his plate again.

“Riley, you're giving my food the look of lust.”  He slid his plate over to Riley.  

“Well if you insist.”   She said, taking a forkful of  eggs, chopped potatoes, cheese, and sausage breakfast casserole.

“That is soooo good.”

“Maybe you should get it the next time you have breakfast here….with me…”  

“I’d like that.”  Riley’s cheeks turned a darker shade of pink.  “Us to have breakfast again, and the breakfast casserole is a good idea too.”

“Alright.”  Liam’s smile brightened even more.  

Taylor watched her sister.  She hadn’t seen someone make Riley smile like that in a long time.   Maybe she was finally trying to let someone in.   Taylor was going to give this Liam guy a chance, if he could make her smile like that.  She hadn’t seen her smile that much since Nico.  

“See you at work sis.  See you around Liam.”  

“It’s been interesting meeting you Taylor.”  

Taylor smiled.  “You know what,  I like him a little more now.  He’s honest.”  

Hayden poured a cup of coffee.  Hayden didn’t dislike anything.  But he found that there were some flavorings he added to his coffee he enjoyed more than others.  

“Hey Hayden!”

“What’s up Liam?”

“Nothing much, how are you?”

“I’m really good.”  

Liam put his lunch bag in the fridge.

“I just want to thank you.”  

“For what?”  Hayden asked.

“For setting me up with Riley.  It might not go anywhere, but I feel like I have a chance.  We might have a chance. And I really like being around her.”  

“I thought you two would be a good match for each other.  You two have the same look in your eyes.  The one you try to hide.”  

“And what look is that Hayden?”  

“Pain.  I think the two of you could help each other heal.”  

“You can see that in the both of us?”  

“You don’t have to tell me about what happened to you Liam.  Or you can, when you feel like you’re ready to.  Just know you have a friend if you ever need to talk.”

Liam was humbled by Hayden's words. Regardless of what Hayden was or wasn't,  Liam knew one thing. Hayden is a true friend. No one could convince him otherwise.

"Thank you Hayden."

Liam had heard horror stories about the matches.  Especially the one that tried to kill the president.  People that knew what Hayden was, stayed away from him in the office.  Others were intrigued.  All still kept their distance.

Hayden was alone at work a lot, until Liam decided to sit with him one day at lunch.

“Mind if I sit with you?”  Liam asked that day.

“Sure, I guess my days of hoarding seats are now over.”

Both Hayden and Liam laughed.

Liam liked Hayden immediately.  They talked about everything. Hayden finally asked the question that was on his mind.

“Why did you sit with me?”  

“You looked like you needed a friend.  I need one too.”  

“Jai, do you have your wallet?”  

“Riley you’re worse than Mom.”  

“Well if you want to have a drink, they’re going to card you.  No one will believe my baby faced brother is twenty one without seeing your license.”

She pinched Jaiden's cheek.

"God you are Mom!!!!"

"And don’t be afraid to talk, Jai.  You cared about him too.”  

“Okay Riley.”  

When they arrived at The Ruby Apple, they were the first to arrive.

“Sal, can we get our usual booth?”  

“Sure sweetheart, it only seems like yesterday was the last time all you all were here together.”

Riley slid into the booth  glancing at all the pictures on the wall.  The Ruby Apple had been one of Nico’s favorite places, and their group of friends were regulars there.  They had their own booth.  And there it was, a picture of the group together celebrating Nico’s birthday, the last one he had with the group.   Nico had put on two birthday hats on his chest, and looked like Madonna when she wore that  cone bra in her music video.

  He was sticking his chest into Riley’s face, and everyone was laughing.  Everyone filed in, that was in town.  Drake, Max, Taylor, Liv, Bert, Savannah, and Kai.

“Where’s Hayden?”  

“He decided he would stay in tonight.”  

"He knew he was welcome right?"

"Oh of course Ri, he knew."

“Sal, can we…..”

“Loaded nachos for the table and your first round?”  

“Yes.”  

“Let me see Super Boy’s id.”  

Taylor laughed.  “That’s funny.”  

Jaiden handed over his driver’s license.  

“I’ll have my waitress bring your stuff over."

A few minutes later a young woman walked over to the table.  Jaiden sat up straight.

Riley raised an eyebrow.  

“Mia!!”  Kai screeched.  “What are you doing here?”

“Working, I pull some shifts here when we’re not on the food truck to make a little extra money.”

Jaiden kept staring at her.  She smiled at him.   She passed out the shots.  It was Nico’s favorite.  Baby Guinness.

“It looks like I have one extra.  I’m sorry, I’ll take it back.”  

“No leave it.  There was supposed to be one more.”  Riley said with a sad look in her eyes.  

Mia left the shot.  “I’ll be back in a few with your loaded nachos for the table.”

“Let’s do this.”  Drake commented. “Everyone hold your glasses up.  Only for you would I drink this weak ass shot for, because you know I’m a whiskey man.  And because of that, I know you are smiling down on all of us.  We fuckin’ miss you, and love you Nico KH. Cheers.”

Everyone clinked glasses and  downed their drinks.

“That’s not weak!”  Jaiden coughed.  

“Says the twenty-one year old that’s had more cough syrup in his life, than actual liquor.”

“Taylor God! He’s your brother, why do you have to be so ruthless?”  Bert laughed.

“You act like you just met me.  You  know this about me. My sensor is perpetually broken.”

She slid by Jaiden.  “I’ll be right back.”

Sal stopped her.

"Riley, I'm so sorry about the number of shots, I wasn't thinking."

"It's alright Sal."

Riley went into the bathroom to compose herself a little bit.  She wiped her eyes and touched up her makeup.  She felt it a victory she hadn't cried today. She sighed walking out of the bathroom when she saw him.

Liam was sitting in a booth alone, reading a book. Not a kindle, an actual book.  Riley smiled. She didn't know why she found it so endearing that he was reading an actual book, and chuckling to himself.

"Liam?"

He looked up at her.

"Hey!"

"What are you reading?"

"It's called The Greek Meet. It's absolutely hilarious."

"Isn't that a movie?"

"It is, but oftentimes the books are always better than the movie versions. The author was consulted on this one, it's pretty close to the book."

"Good deal! Are you alone Liam?"

"Yeah, but I'm fine Riley." He smiled at her.

"Liam…."

"I'm used to it." He reassured her.

His words stung Riley's heart.

"What happened to you Liam?"

"I was sick a lot as a kid.  I spent a lot of time alone in a hospital room."

"Come sit with us Liam."

He shook his head no.

"It's okay Riley. I'm fine really."

"Please?"

He glanced up at her.

"If you insist."

Liam followed Riley over to the big booth full of people.

"Who's this clown?"  Drake asked.

"Drake don't be a Taylor."

Everyone at the table laughed at Jaiden's comment.

"I resent that. And from all people, my little brother. Really Jai?"

"It's what we do. Broken sensors and sarcasm is a love language we're sure."

Drake and Taylor  high fived each other.

Riley introduced Liam to the table as her friend.  He sat next to Riley and across from Kai.

Mia showed up with another round of drinks.

"This one is on Sal! Hey about time you showed up! You missed the first round.  Just in time for the second."

"Excuse me?" Liam looked confused.

Mia passed out the shots.

"You said there was supposed to be one more. This is him right?"

Oh God. Liam thought as he looked at Riley. They were here for Nico.

Riley stammered.  No one knew what to say.

Riley's face fell.

"Yeah! I'm always late. You know me." Liam said with a smile at Riley.

"Great! I'll be back with your Nachos."

Drake gave Liam a nod of approval.  He had earned respect at the table.

"Come on then let's do this before the damn alcohol evaporates. You too Liam."

Everyone held up their drinks.

“You know we got more people in this booth this year without your big ass head in the way?  We still miss you though. Happy birthday in heaven.”  

Everyone drank their shots.

“Softie, your emotions… “  Maxwell nudged Taylor.

“I am NOT SOFT!!!”  You know this about me Max."

“So how was it?”

“Not terrible. Actually, I liked it.”  

Mia came back with the huge plates of Nachos.

“Yasssssssssssss!!!” Maxwell screamed.

Riley looked at Liam.  “Thanks.” she whispered to him.  

He winked at her.  “No problem.”  

Mia refilled the waters on the table.  

“Can I get a coke?”  Jaiden blushed at Mia.

“Sure sweetie, I got ya.”  

“Somebody’s got a crush on the cute waitress.”  

“She’s nineteen.”  

“How do you know that Kai?”  Riley asked.

“She runs my favorite food truck with her dad.  You saw the cute shirts.  Pops on the Go.  That’s Pop’s daughter Mia.”  

“She’s even made her uniform a little spunky.  She stands out from all the other waitresses.

“And not to mention her pink chuck taylors.”  

“Her what?”  Jaiden asked.

“Jaiden her shoes.”  

“They’re converse.”  

“You’re so young. But you know what we’re going to help you.  We’re feeling inspired.  I feel like Nico would help you out. Nico KH was a great wingman. We’re going to be your wing people tonight.”  

“Kai you’re up.”   Drake said.

“Here’s your coke.”   . “Thank you.”  Jaiden’s cheeks were bright red.

“Hey Mia?”  

“Yeah Kai?”

“Between Pops and here, how in the world do you have time for a social life?”

Mia laughed.  “What social life?  The most social I am right now, has media behind it, or talking to my customers.”  

“You mean to tell me as adorable as you are, you’re not seeing anyone currently?”  

“No, not right now.”  

Kai glanced at Jaiden and winked.  

“Can I get you guy’s dinner orders going?”

She paused.  Jaiden was just staring at her in awe saying nothing.  

Riley hit him.  “Jai, she wants your food order!!!”

“OH!!! Can you come back to me, I’m not sure yet.”  

Taylor made the sound of someone crashing and burning.

“You’re going to hell Taylor.” Drake said.

“With the way you drink whiskey, Drake, you're gonna be there first. You can save me a seat in the lake of fire.”  

By the time it was Jaiden’s turn to order he still looked indecisive.

“What’s your favorite thing on the menu?”

“My favorite is the tofu burger with carrot fries.”  

Drake made vomit sounds.

“Seriously?”  Jaiden asked.  Yeah he wasn’t going to attempt that one for a girl.

“Um no.  Get the Monster bacon burger with loaded fries.”  

“That sounds really good.”  

They enjoyed their dinner.

Mia passed out all the checks.

Riley grabbed Jaiden’s.  

“I owe you dinner.”  

She took his.  She smiled when she opened it.  

“You might want this though.”  

On a little separate piece of paper was Mia’s phone number.  

Jaiden smiled when he looked at the digits written on the piece of paper.  

He picked up his phone.

Drake snatched the paper away.

“Don’t you text her yet!!!!!!”

“Don’t play games with her.”  Savannah  said.  All the women at the table nodded.

“He’s not supposed to text right away. Makes him look over eager.”  

“Um he is eager.  Let’s be real.”  

“Are you staying with me tonight Jai?”

“Do you mind?”  

“Nope, you’re a little wobbly, you’re coming home with me.”

“If that isn’t the pot calling the kettle black.  You too Riley.”  

“I can walk you guys back if you want.”  

“Thank you Liam that would be great.”

Liam waited for Riley and Jaiden outside.  

Drake approached him.

“You know that was really nice what you did for her earlier in there.  None of us knew what to say without hurting her.”  

“Not a big deal,  I was only trying to help make an awkward situation… less awkward you know?”

“Riley is like a sister to me.  She’s been through a lot.  If you break her heart, I will break your face. Am I clear?”  

Liam swallowed thickly.  “Crystal.”  

Drake slapped Liam on the back when Riley came up.

"Nice seeing you Liam. Remember what I said!"

Liam, Riley, and Jaiden started walking to Riley's apartment in silence.

"My feet hurt." Riley grumbled.

"C'mon Ri."

Jaiden crouched in front of her.

She hopped onto his back.  After a few blocks Jaiden’s pace really slowed.

Jaiden grumbled. "I'm not going to make it."

He put Riley down on a park bench.

"My feet still hurt.”

"Do you trust me?" Liam inquired.

"Within reason, why?"

"This is why."

Liam effortlessly picked Riley up carrying her over the threshold.

Riley wrapped her arms around Liam's neck.

"I feel like a princess." Riley giggled still a little tipsy.

"No Riley, you're a Queen."

"Queen Riley. That's pretty nice."

Riley rested her head on Liam's chest, hearing his heart beat steady in his chest. It lulled Riley right to sleep.

Liam tried to pass some knowledge on to Riley’s younger brother.

"You know Jaiden, I agree with the ladies about Mia. If you want to get to know her better, text her. Don't wait. She seems like a really sweet girl."

"Is Riley snoring?"

Liam glanced down at Riley again. Her head was nestled right next to his heart.

"She's out like a light."

"You like my sister don't you?"

"What's not to like? She's amazing!"

"Riley is not going to forget him, Liam."

"I'm not asking her to. I'm just hoping she will open her heart to me."

"It's the same thing."

"It isn't. I know I can't replace him. There is a part of her heart that will always be his because of the way she lost him. I'm not asking her for that. I don't want that part of her. What I do want is the chance to make her happy, her to give me a chance to. And we could find a happy place together, her and I ."

He glanced at Riley. She snorted, waking herself up. Jaiden was laughing, Liam was trying hard not to. He just thought she was so damn cute.

"Was I snoring?"

"No, not at all Riley, you just breathe heavy."

"Where's your key? We're at your place."

Liam put Riley down at her door. Riley fished in her purse for her keys.

“Want to say hi to your buddy?”  Riley asked.  

Hell ya I do!”

Chance ran up to Liam once they got inside the apartment.

“He really likes you a lot.”  

“Yeah no one else matters when Liam is around.  Don’t forget who feeds you every day twice a day Chance.”  

“I think it’s forgotten.”  Liam chuckled.  

Liam saw Jaiden get excited as he looked at his phone.

"Mia just texted me back!"

"I'm so glad you didn't listen to Drake."

"Yeah I listened to Liam."

"What about your sisters or all the other women at the table."

"I am the great and powerful Li. Wise beyond his years. " he said with a wink.

Riley rolled her eyes.

The next morning Riley woke up with a headache.  

“Ri! Where’s your sugar?”  Jaiden called through the door.  

“In the sugar bowl on the table.”

Riley groaned grabbing her head.

“Ugh.. Baby Guinness, you are not my friend.”  

Riley settled back into bed and closed her eyes.  She heard a soft mumble and the bed settled next to her.  

Riley opened her eyes.  She rolled over finding Liam sleeping in the bed next to her shirtless.  

What the Fuck.

@dcbbw​​    @queenjilian​​       @jessiembruno​​       @bbrandy2002​​       @khoicesbyk​​      @janezillow​​     @sillypapermango​​      @gkittylove99​​ @gabesmommie1130​​      @mom2000aggie​​      @lovablegranny​​      @jared2612​​

@shewillreadyou​      @zoehanji​        @queenwalton​     @mrsdrakewalkerblog​       @hopefulmoonobject​     @hopelessromanticmonie​      @kingliamandriley​      @batgirlassociationofgothamcity​    @iaminlovewithtrr      @iam-the-kind-and-thoughtful​​       @ladyangel70​​      @twinkleallnight​​      @kat-tia801​​       @caseyvalentineramsey​​     @thequeenchoices​​     @yourmajesty09​​      @amandablink​​      @secretaryunpaid​​   @sfb123​​      @neotericthemis​​    @royalromancer​​      @sweatyrysconnoisseur​​ @nala-raines​

[redwinterroses]

(hope the first ask arrived okay, im keeping a close eye on tumblr being weird)

Endermen Gendermen

so almost everybody has heard the big common theory about the origin of Endermen by now, and this won't be much different from it, there's just some added flavor (i haven't watched any of the matpat theories btw)

there was someone once, who invented the magic that powers spawners and nether portals, and someone who made the end portal frames and went through for the first time

were they players? maybe, maybe not. they certainly couldnt have been too different, everything they left behind isnt too different from what players create after all. and maybe they were players, and some of them stayed and are still here and never changed much at all (or maybe they're just that slightest bit Off, because they're pretending, but they don't fit in at all, not anymore)

but that doesn't matter, because this is about the ones who went through the portal and travelled the End, and those who decided to stay there and explore and settle down and live. whoever they were, they knew about magic the players now don't, magic that is black and purple... just like the Void in the End. (but not like the end portal frames, which are yellow and green like a certain new monster that's not quite yet in the game, curiously enough) So its save to assume they observed the End and the Void that's woven through it like nowhere else, and they learnt how to make something from nothing and put spawners into the world. But the Void is dangerous, and it warps and twists anything in contact with it for too long. Everything native to the dimension has adapted, but whoever the newcomers were had not yet

flamingos aren't born pink, they eat shrimp full of red pigment which seeps into them and changes the colors of their feathers. whoever the endermen originally were couldn't teleport, but live on a diet of chorus fruit for long enough and their magic will seep in. and so will the Void itself, coloring what touches it too much a deep black over time, and finally making eyes grow purple and magenta. who knows how gravity works in the End with its floating islands, if it works at all. but weird gravity affects anatomy, stretches and compresses limbs into thin sticks. (the only thing left to remind of their origins are the pearls, which are once again a certain interesting shade of green)

the mob behavior and apparent lack of sentience is a different tale entirely. at some point, too much curiosity turned into hubris and became their downfall. they messed with too much of the Void's magic, let it seep too much into their bodies and minds. There were other beings out there who were much more powerful, maybe even made of the Void itself. And one of the Enderdragons, or many of them, one day decided these people made of Void are all too easy to control (be it as an army of foot soldiers, food that delivers itself or as a way to stop them from hunting the dragons for ship decorations)

an actual clearly defined classification of Endermen as a type of mob is straight up impossible due to this complex origin. can you call something that was almost a player once a simple mob? especially when some still try to communicate, some even show signs of being able to learn your language? (i imagine taxonomy in minecraft as a special kind of hell all thanks to endermen and endermen alone, screwing up any system someone tries to come up with)

did these people build the End Cities? they certainly had a hand in it, along with the others that used to live in the End. Especially in introducing the concept of "boats" and being the reason why there's diamond gear and enchantments in the End, despite the place lacking everything required for the creation of these things

oh yeah and of course, "ender" is a very old name for the Void! Enderdragon, Endermen, Eyes of Ender, Enderpearls? who knows about that weirdly green stuff, im waiting for 1.18 for that (the eyes of ender sure are an interesting key, with one part of it being carried by the ones who first used them and the other being created from parts of a mob that does not naturally exist anywhere, only spawning from strange blocks created with the colors of the Void)

thats all for now because in my timezone its the middle of the friggin night, up next in a few hours: End Avians, Elytra and a few more obvious mcyt references

Okay, I am in love with the concept of the Void itself being what changes and warps things in the end.

And with "ender" being another word for the Void -- the irony being that this is how a lot of players choose to get home when they get lost in the End: stow all your gear in an enderchest and then jump into the void. The player-ender, as it were.

(pineappleoracle headcanons, part 2)

[chickensarentcheap]

Never Gonna Be Alone -Chapter 26

Title: Preparations

Warning:  it’s filler.  I figured we needed some cute daddy Tyler. lol

Tagging:  @c-a-v-a-l-r-y​, @innerpaperexpertcloud​, @alievans007​, @miss-smutty​, @tragiclyhip��

“When you met mumma, you guys were working together, right?”

Addie poses the question as she sits atop the kitchen island; legs swinging back and forth as they dangle over the edge, the heels of silver and gold glitter infused jelly sandals lightly thumping against the wood. She insisted on bringing one of her favourite pairs of shoes from home; arguing that she didn’t care that they were ‘out of season’ and that she would wear what she wants, when she wants, and no one could tell her otherwise. In the end they’d gone perfectly with the new ‘Christmas’ dress she’d picked out Bloomingdales; a vibrant yellow concoction with capped sleeves embellished with strips of lace, a sash around the waist that ties in an enormous bow at the back, and an elaborate tulle skirt several layers thick that shimmers in the light. Forgoing all the burgundy, emerald green, and red dresses that had lined the regular priced racks in favour of an outfit from the leftover and highly discounted summer section. It was a hill Esme hadn't been willing to die on; preferring that Addie showcase both her independence in choosing her own outfit, and being proud of her personal style and preferences. And it suits her; as bright and adorable as her personality with just enough ‘no fucks given’ sprinkled on for good measure.

While tiny and seemingly fragile, she can be extremely assertive and adverse to any form of compromise; tenacious to a fault and digging her heels in and sticking to her guns when she feels she’s one hundred right about her stance. Even if there’s mountains of proof to show that she is, in fact, completely wrong. Someone so stubborn and feisty lingering inside that cute, wee package; able to hold her own while out playing with her older siblings and not afraid to get a bloody nose or a fat lip or a black eye. And not deterred in the slightest when she DOES get injured; right back to what she was doing only hours after getting stitches or a cast removed. Not shying away from climbing trees or splashing in mud puddles or helping muck out the goats stalls while wearing clunky rubber boots paired with a Disney princess dress. Very much like her older sister had been at that age; enjoying being physical and active and playing sports and rough housing one minute, then showcasing her more ‘girly side’ the next. Loving trips to the salon with mummy for manis and pedis; enjoying picking her own shade of polish and then getting to sip orange juice from a champagne glass while getting a facial and her hair trimmed. Collecting dolls along with various rocks and shells and beach glass. Superhero figures taking up residence on her bedroom shelves right alongside stuffies of her favourite animals -koalas, sloths, and kangaroos currently at the top of the list- and snow globes from different parts of the world. Her closet filled with not only frilly dresses and sparkly leggings and colourful sweaters emblazoned with unicorns and french bulldogs and flamingos, but old hand me downs from her brothers; ripped and faded jeans and tattered t-shirts and board shorts.

“Right,” Tyler confirms, as he tends to running a brush through her waist length hair; damp from misting it down with a spray bottle in order to easier part it into sections.

It’s a far cry from his old life; his beaten and busted up hands with their multitude of scars and calluses once used to being soaked in blood and caked with dirt. Large and weathered with misshapen knuckles, they’d long ago gotten accustomed to hard, manual labour and the brutality that he’d had to inflict on others; fists that pummelled bodies and faces and fingers that pulled triggers and wrapped around throats and choked the life out of combatants. And while they still get caked in mud from working around the house and they’re still entrusted to load magazines and are capable of taking a gun apart in thirteen seconds flat, they’ve morphed into other uses. Beginning with diapering babies and tending to the impossibly tiny snaps on jumpers, buttons on little sweaters, and zippers on sleepers. Moving on to tying kid sized shoe laces and cleaning and patching up skinned knees and elbows. Advancing to far more difficult hair styling techniques than the simple ponytails he’d began affixing on Millie when she was a toddler; various styles of braids adorned with ribbons, and snapping barrettes and clamping clips into place.

Being a girl dad is unlike anything he’d ever experienced before. The six short years -despite the little time he’d actually been home- he’d spent with Austin had prepared him for raising boys. His son, when healthy, had been extremely active and fearless and full of curiosity and energy; getting as messy and as dirty as possible and loving every second of it. Obsessed with superheroes and sports and always clad in clothing that displayed his favourites; football jerseys and baseball caps and sweats emblazoned with Superman or Batman logos. He had been terrified twelve years ago when the news had come in that Millie was in fact going to be a girl; not only envisioning frilly dresses and a closet full of pink and those ridiculous headbands parents insist on putting on their infants, but thinking back to his own treatment of women. The days when he’d used them for nothing more than sex; random strangers picked up in bars or that he’d meet on the street in whatever city a job sent him to. A failed marriage; putting more of a priority on the military than he did on treating his wife properly. And all he could think about was how having a daughter was somehow a punishment for the bad shit he’d done. A little girl that he’d have to protect from guys like him.

It was hard to get used to; big fingers having to master putting in tiny earrings and tending to impossibly small zippers and buttons , getting comfortable with the amount of pink and purple in their rooms and closets. Eventually graduating into attending tea parties and playing with Barbies and helping make crafts; getting used to paint on his palms and between his fingers and glitter stuck under his nails and in his hair and beard. Determined to be a hands-on father even if its activities are way outside of his comfort zone; gymnastic meets and dance recitals as opposed to lacrosse matches and football games. Being a girl dad isn’t for the weak; having to worry about your little girls’ hearts being broken and if the guys they pick will treat them right and if they themselves will make smart and responsible choices as teenagers. And the hormones; the up and down emotions and the drastic switch from bitchy to overly sensitive. Having a wife go through it once a month is enough. never mind the thought of three other girls. The worry of how he’ll handle not only the emergence of puberty, but if all four female ‘clocks’ decide to sync up. He doesn’t know if he’ll be able to handle THAT; all the women in his life going through the cramps and the moodiness and the demands to be coddled and babied one minute and left the fuck alone the next.

“Does that mean mummy beat up and killed bad guys too?”

“No. She never did any of that stuff. That was my job, not hers.”

“What did she do?”

“She tracked down the bad guys. And where they were doing mean things to good people. Then she told me...or guys like me...where they were so we could go and take care of things.”

“So you could go and kill them?”

“You don’t always have to kill people. Sometimes it’s enough to just rough them up a bit.”

“And other times they fight back and try to hurt you and you have to hurt them first?”

“Pretty much.”

“Have you killed a lot of people?”

“Not that many," he lies. It's actually a staggering amount; the death toll -from his hand alone- in Dhaka putting the count well over three hundred.

“How many is ‘not that many'?’”

“I don’t know, Peanut. I’ve never kept track.”

“But you’ve helped more people than you’ve hurt. That’s what mummy said when I asked if it was true. If Tyler was lying when he told me you kill people for a living.”

“That’s a while ago. That you asked mummy that.”

“I was three. That’s a whole two years ago. But sometimes I think about it. Especially when you go away. I think about you having to kill people.”

“And what do you think WHEN you think about that? About what I sometimes have to do?”

“I dunno know,” Addie shrugs, and then lifts the spray bottle clutched in both hands and holds it towards her face; giggling when she pulls the trigger and catches some of the mist in her mouth.

“Does it bother you? When you think about it? That I’ve killed people? That sometimes I still have to?”

“Why would it bother me?”

“Kind of a hard thing to hear, don’t you think? That daddy has to do stuff like that?”

“It’s your job. It’s what you do. You have to hurt people to save other people. And sometimes, if they try and hurt you first, you have to kill them. Because if you didn’t, they might kill you and then you never come home and we never get to see you again. It’s not THAT hard to hear. I’d rather you kill someone and come home than never see you again.”

“You know,” he plucks the spray bottle from her hands and dampens a section of hair. “You’re pretty smart for only five.”

“Smart like mummy.”

He leans in to press a kiss to her cheek. “Cute like her too.”

“Are you going to get in trouble? For killing people?”

“Who would I get in trouble with?”

“God. Isn’t that one of the things we’re not supposed to do? Kill people?”

“How do you know about that? We don’t talk about that stuff at home.”

“I hear things. At school. Some of the older kids talking. Are you? Going to get in trouble? For killing people?”

“Probably,” he admits. “I’m sure I’ll face some kind of judgement for it. When my time comes.”

“But wouldn’t it be okay ‘cause you only kill bad people? That were hurting good people? Wouldn’t that be allowed? And if you had to kill someone so you could come home to us, wouldn’t that be okay too?”

“I don’t know,” he snags a yellow cloth ribbon off the island and begins braiding a section of hair around it. “I’ve never thought that far ahead about things.”

“It would suck if you got in trouble for helping people. That wouldn’t be fair at all. If you got sent to hell for doing stuff like that. I mean, you were doing something GOOD. You weren’t doing something bad. You HAD to kill evil people to help good people. And to make sure you come home to mummy and us kids. I can’t see you getting in trouble for something like THAT.”

“Doesn’t make much sense to me either. But not a lot does anymore.”

“I’ll be really mad if you get in trouble and sent somewhere different than me. I don’t want us to be in two separate places. I want us to be together. All of us. You and mummy and all us kids. I don’t want us to all be separated. Well, maybe Millie could be. Because she’s mean to me. All the time.”

“Millie is going through some stuff. She’s going to be a teenager soon. A lot of drama leading up to THAT.”

“She says I’m annoying. That she used to really like me when I was a baby and couldn’t do anything. But now I can do lots of stuff and I can talk and she says that pisses her off. That I’m a bratty little sister.”

“You are NOT bratty.”

“Right? That’s what I said. She’s bratty if anything. Am I annoying, daddy? Don’t lie. You can tell me the truth.”

“You are not annoying. If anyone is annoying, it’s Millie.”

“I said THAT too! But she’s mean. She even threatened to cut my hair off. Shave it. Because I couldn’t find my brush and I borrowed hers and she didn’t like that. So you know what I did? While you were gone?”

“What did you do?”

“I took the tops off two Oreo cookies and I ate the middle and then I put in mayonnaise and I put the tops back on and gave them to Millie. I told her I was being a good little sister and bringing her a snack. And she put a whole one in her mouth! She almost puked!”

He can’t help but chuckle. “You actually did that?”

“Yup. It was awesome. I laughed so hard, I almost peed! But then she started chasing me around the house threatening to kill me. Mummy was screaming at her to lighten up, that it was just a joke. And then she told mummy to shut up and Tyler got mad. REALLY mad. He tackled Millie and grabbed her by the hair and pushed her face into the carpet. Then he put her in a figure four leg lock and made her cry.”

“Millie told your mom to shut up?”

“Oooops…” Addie tilts her head back to look at him, a sheepish smile curving her lips. “....I wasn’t supposed to tell you that part.”

“Who told you not to tell me? Millie?”

The five year old shakes her head.

“TJ?”

Another shake, followed by a tiny “No.”

“Addie…”

“It was mummy! She said not to tell you because you’d get pissed off and you didn’t need to. Because she took care of it right when it happened. Well, Tyler did. He was really, really, REALLY mad. She learned her lesson. I’m sure of it. He made her cry. Lots.”

“Did that happen a lot? Millie getting mouthy with your mom?”

“Not really.”

He stares pointedly down at her.

“A few times,” she reluctantly admits. “She said some things that were really mean. To mummy. And she said the F word once, too. Mixed with the B word.”

“She said that ? To your mom?”

Addie chews nervously on her bottom lip. “Yeah, she called her an f-ing B word.”

“What did mummy do?”

“She didn’t get a chance to do anything. Desi freaked out. And he’s really big and he can be really scary when he wants. Like you. Desi told her that she should never, ever talk to her mum like that. And that you’d be really mad if you found out. And that she’d rather deal with him than you. Which is true. Desi might be bigger than you, but you’re definitely tougher. I mean, he doesn’t kill people for a living. You do.”

“Things were pretty bad, huh? While I was gone.”

“A little. Millie went off the reservation. Big time. She’s lucky she’s even breathing. ‘Cause Tyler was ready to kill her. And I don’t blame him. You’re mad, aren’t you. Are you mad, daddy?”

“A bit.”

“You know how I can tell? That you’re mad? Your neck moves. Right here,” she reaches up to press to fingertips against the side of his throat. “Where the bad guy shot you a long time ago.”

“How did you know about that?”

“Mummy told me. I asked her how you got that scar. She said that a long time ago, her and Ovi were in trouble and you had to get them out of a really bad place. And then you made sure they were safe and sound, but a bad guy shot you. In the neck. And that’s why you have the scar there.”

“Did that scare you? Hearing that?”

“A little, I guess. I mean, you could have died, right?”

“I could have, yeah.”

“And then you and mummy never would have gotten married. And had kids. Millie would be the only one to exist. None of us would. So yeah, that part scared me a bit; that the bad guy could have killed and none of us ever would have been born. Did you kill him?”

“Eventually.”

“Mummy said she stayed with you. After it happened. And that she went back to Australia with you and that’s how she ended up there. It’s where you guys got married. And had Millie and me and Kota and Brookie. That we were the ones born there. So we’re REAL Australians, like you. Everyone else is American.”

“Everyone else WAS American. You’re all Australian now.”

“How does that work?”

“A lot of papers you have to fill out. To become a citizen. But you all are. Mummy and I made sure of it.”

“Is mummy an Australian too?”

“By marriage, yeah.”

“It’s a good thing she married you. You’re a lucky guy, daddy. That someone like mummy fell in love with you.”

“I am,” he confirms. “Very lucky. She’s a pretty good mummy, huh?”

“She’s the best mummy EVER. If we could pick our mummies, I’d pick her. Because she’s nice and she gives good cuddles and kisses and she tells the best silly jokes. And she’s super smart and really cute too. And little! Like me!”

“That’s where you get from. Being so cute and wee. You’re just like your mumma.”

Her eyes sparkle as she smiles broadly up at him; the corners and the bridge of her nose crinkle. “And that’s a good thing, yeah?”

“A very good thing,” Dropping a kiss on her forehead, he brushes the tip of his nose against hers; smiling at the way she throws her head back and giggles.

He’s seen her mother do that exact movement and expression a number of times; excitement while on the rides at Disney World with the kids, when she’s had one too many glasses of wine and even his terrible ‘dad jokes’ are suddenly hilarious, when they’ve been on one of their ‘mommy and daddy’ vacations and she’s gotten up the guts to try something new and exciting; emboldened by his encouragement and forever feeling safe and secure as long as he’s by her side. So much of Esme in the tiny little girl in front of him; tenacious and ferociously intelligent and loving deeply and fearlessly. Knowing the darkness and the horrors that exist in the world but not allowing herself to be tarnished by it; always finding ways to smile and laugh and find the beauty in every day.

“What do you think mummy would have done if she didn’t do the job she did?” Addie inquires, when she finally drops her head back down and he’s able to return to tending her hair.

“I don’t know. Teach? Be a nurse? Maybe a doctor?”

“How would you have met her? If she didn’t do her old job?”

“Maybe I would have met her on the beach. In Australia. Maybe she would have come there on a vacation.”

“Maybe. Or maybe you would have gone to where she used to live. In Chicago.”

“She used to live in Colorado. That’s where she was born and where she grew up. Chicago is a totally different place.”

“She used to live by the mountains. When I was in her tummy, you guys lived on a hobby farm. And you had goats and chickens. Mummy says we still own that house.”

“Yup, we do. We rent it out.”

“Can we go there one day? I’d like to see it. I’d like to see where you guys were living when I was in mummy’s belly. Is that where I was made?”

“We’re pretty sure that’s where it happened. Not many other places it could have been.”

“Maybe we can go and visit. And I can see where I was made. That would be fun. I want to see the mountains.”

“Maybe one day.” He finishes up the first braided pigtail, securing it with an impossibly small elastic before turning his attention to the other section of hair.

“If you met mummy a different way, would you have still liked her? Would you have still fallen in love with her?”

“Yup. Why wouldn’t have I? She still would have been mummy. She still would have been the same person. Still would have been the most beautiful girl ever.”

“Do you think she still would have fallen in love with you?”

“I sure as hell hope so. Would sure suck if she didn’t. Your mumma is pretty special, Peanut. She’s the love of my life. Took me until I was thirty five to meet her.”

“You were married before, though. To Austin's mom. You didn’t love her?”

“I did. But not in the way I love your mum. Your mum? That’s who I want to spend the rest of my life with. Grow really, really, REALLY old with. It’s a whole other kind of love. And you know what? It’s not easy to explain. You just know what you feel.”

“Imagine if things were opposite? If you went to Colorado and met mummy instead of her meeting you in Australia and working with you? And then you would have stayed there; where the snow and the mountains are instead of the beach and the ocean. How come you moved? Why didn’t you guys stay? Where the mountains are?”

“Things changed. We weren’t happy there anymore. We needed to get away. Go back to the place where we were the happiest.”

“In Australia?”

“Yup.”

“That’s where I’m happiest too. I love it there. I love how warm it is; the sun and the sand and the water. I like the sound it makes; listening to it when I’m trying to fall asleep. And I like how the beach feels; between my toes and when I let it run through my fingers. And I love my room and my toys and my school and my friends and all the goats and our pigs and our chickens. And Charlie. I love him the most. I love making him peanut butter sandwiches. I’d miss him the most. If we had to leave. We won’t have to leave will we, daddy?”

“I don’t see why we would have to.”

“I don’t ever want to leave Australia. It’s perfect there. It’s where I was born. And where you were born too. We have that in common. We were BOTH born there.”

“Yeah…” he grins, and presses a kiss to the back of her head. “...we were.”

“I mean, we have other stuff in common too. Because you’re my dad and that means you helped make me so that means half of me is half of you. The other half is from mummy. And we both love surfing. And animals. And Vegemite. I LOVE Vegemite. It’s sooooo good.”

“Speaking of Vegemite, was it you that left the Vegemite and Nutella sandwich for Santa?”

Addie giggles. “Maybe…”

“Why would you ever put the two of those together?”

“Tyler made it for his school lunch once and he let me try a bit and it was really good! So I thought Santa might like to try it. Part American, part Australian.”

“You know, that’s pretty genius. And it worked. I tried a bit and it wasn’t bad.”

“Right?! You wouldn’t think it would work, but it does. Somehow. Kind of like you and mummy.”

“What’s THAT supposed to mean?”

“You and mummy are so different. You’re really tall and big and she’s really short and small. Like, you know how mummy is a morning person? She’s always really cheerful and smiley? And you’re not? You’re moody and miserable. A total grump face! And you don’t like to talk until you’ve had your first coffee. With three shots of espresso in it.”

“You notice all that stuff?”

“I notice everything. Mummy says I’m very observant. And that I have really good instincts. Like you. She says ‘cause my tummy tells me if something is right or wrong. And yours does too. You know how else you and mummy are different?”

“How?”

“Mummy talks to everyone! She’s very talky talky. A chatterbox.”

“Geez,” Tyler grins, and tugs playfully at the completed pigtail. “I wonder who ELSE is a chatterbox?”

“She’s a social butterfly. She makes friends everywhere she goes. People like her. Because she’s so bubbly and cute and she makes peoples hearts feel warm because she’s so nice to them. You’re more serious. You don’t talk a lot. At least not to people you don’t know. People are scared of you sometimes. Because how big you are and because you got all the drawings on you and the scars and stuff. They think you’re mean. ‘Cause of all that.”

“And what do you think?”

“I think you’re just daddy. I KNOW you’re not mean. I KNOW you’re a nice guy. I KNOW you give awesome hugs; your arms are big but they feel nice and they wrap all the way around me! If people really paid attention, they’d see that you’re nice. You have soft eyes. They’re blue and they’re pretty and they’re kind. Especially when you smile and they go all crinkly. If people really gave you a chance, they’d see you’re not scary at all. You’re only like that if you HAVE to be. If bad people are near mummy or us kids.”

“Are you ever scared of me?” It’s a recurring thought; if his children ever pick up on the worry and the tension and the fear that comes with his issues. It’s a feat some days; forcing himself out of bed and putting one foot in front of the other. Wanting nothing more than to stay under the covers and surrender to the exhaustion that comes with doing battle with his own mind every day. But his family is his number one priority, whether it’s a good day or a horrible one. And he’ll ‘fake it until he makes it’ as long as his children and his wife know that they’re loved; provided and cared for and made to feel safe and protected.

“Why would I be? Why would I be scared of my daddy?”

“Well, you know what I do for a living. You know what I’ve had to do to people. Does that scare you?”

“Nope. Because that’s just your job. It’s not who you are. When you come home, you’re just daddy. You take us bike riding and hiking and swimming and surfing. And you help us find rocks and shells and you let me sit on your shoulders when we walk on the beach or go into town. And we take naps. On the hammock. I love our naps on the hammock.”

He smiles. “So do I.”

“Sometimes I get a little worried. When you get upset. Or you and mummy argue. I don’t like when you guys argue. I always worry that you’ll hate each other. That you’ll get a divorce. And then you won’t live with us. It makes me sad when I think about that.”

“You don’t need to be sad, Peanut. That’s never going to happen. I’m never going to go and live somewhere else. I’m going to stay right where I am; with you guys and your mumma. And just because we argue? That doesn’t mean we’re going to hate each other. I could NEVER hate your mum. And I’m pretty sure she’d say the same thing about me. We love each other. Very much. Divorce is NOT something you need to think about. But do I ever scare you? Have I ever?”

“I don’t have a reason to be scared of you. Because you love me. You’d never hurt me. I never worry about that. Not even when you yell and your voice gets REALLY loud. I know you’d never do anything mean to me. Just to bad people. And I’m not a person. I’m a GOOD person.”

“You definitely are. You’re a VERY good person. An amazing little person.”

She smiles. “Like mummy.”

“Just like her. More than even I ever realized.”

******

“Addie…” TJ singsongs as he saunters into the kitchen, both hands tucked behind his back. “...what are you doing?”

“Tyler!” She cheerfully greets, and excitedly waves to him with both hands. Her entire face lighting up at the sight of her second favourite male in the house

She’s become extremely close to her oldest brother during her five years on earth; idolizing him and turning to him for help and comfort when daddy is either caught up with one of the other kids, tending to work related matters, or out of the house -and sometimes even the country- all together. And TJ dotes on her in return. Spoiling her and babying her ever since she was an infant and he was always more than willing to help change her diapers and give her feedings. In awe of how tiny she was and how she’d look up at him with so much adoration. He’s the quintessential older brother; patient and loving and ready to kick anyone’s ass that dares messes with her.

“Look at my dress! It’s the one I picked out when I went shopping for mommy. That I kept a secret. Isn’t it awesome?”

“Awesome just like you. It’s really pretty, Ads. Your favourite colour too!”

“Yup! Mummy bought it for me. She said it’s perfect for me. For my personality. It reminds me of Belle’s dress. From Beauty and the Beast.”

“Looks a little like it, I guess. But you know what? It’s even prettier. And you’re more beautiful than Belle. WAY more beautiful.”

“Really?” she gasps, and a noticeable blush creeps into her cheeks, spreading all the way to the tips of her ears. “You really think so?”

“I REALLY think so. Belle has nothing on you. You’re the prettiest princess EVER. Way prettier than ANY of them.”

“Oh goodness!” She clamps both hands over her mouth in embarrassment, then giggles into them. “Like mumma? Just as pretty as her? Mumma is the prettiest EVER.”

“Just a smaller version of her.” TJ leans in close and presses the tip of his nose against hers. “Guess what I have? What you forgot in my room?”

“Adeline!” she cries, when he reveals the item he’d been keeping behind his back. And she snags the doll from him and showers its head and face with kisses as she clutches it tightly to her chest. “Adeline! I’m sorry I forgot you! I didn’t mean to!”

“I kept her safe for you,” TJ says. “So Declan wouldn’t grab her. You know how he likes to get a hold of dolls and torture them. I didn’t want him getting her. She’s way too pretty and I know how much you love her.”

“He’s mean to my dolls! He’s always taking their heads off and putting their arms where their legs should be and crazy shit like that.”

“Hey,” Tyler frowns, and tugs on the half braided pigtail. “What did I say?”

“No bad language. Especially on Christmas Day. I can’t help it though; sometimes it just slips out. If you didn’t swear so much around us kids…”

“That’s it. Throw me under the bus.”

“You swear A LOT, daddy. Especially in the car. When other people don’t drive fast enough or use their blinkers. If mummy knew exactly how much you DO swear around us, she’d be mad. REALLY mad.”

“Your mum has a worse mouth than I do.”

“As if!” Addie scoffs, and he can’t help but smile; easily hearing Esme’s voice and picturing the expression on her face; the corner up her mouth and her nose scrunched up in disgust, eyes slightly narrowed. “Thank you, Tyler!” She curls an arm around her brother’s neck, squeezing as tight as she can. “You’re the best! Thank you for keeping her safe from the Ginger. You’re the best brother EVER! I only trust you with her. And daddy. That’s it. You guys are big and strong and will keep her safe no matter what.”

“What the hell are you wearing?” He addresses his son as the latter moves to the fridge, pausing in the braiding of Addie’s hair to survey TJ’s wardrobe a pair of ill fitting and impossibly baggy jeans, an enormous untucked dress shirt with its sleeves rolled to his elbows, and a loose pink, purple, and grey striped tie.

“Your pants. And one of your shirts.” TJ reaches into the fridge and grabs a carton of chocolate milk and a jug of white. Closing the door with his hip and carrying them to the counter by the sink; pouring a mix of both into a plastic tumblr retrieved from the dish rack and then snagging two straws from the cupboard. “Mum told me to. She said none of my clothes were good enough for Christmas dinner. All my jeans have holes in them and all t-shirts have to do with surfing. We’ve never had to dress up for Christmas dinner before. Why do we have to start now?”

“Your mum’s trying to make things perfect. To avoid drama. With your grandmother.”

“Too late. Grandma brings drama with her. And drops it on everyone else.” He drags a bar stool across the floor and places it in front of his little sister. “Here Ads,” he holds the cup in front of her. “A yellow straw just for you. So you don’t have to share my germs. Let me hold it; so you don’t spill anything on your dress.”

Giving a delighted squeal and a smile of appreciation, she takes a pull from the straw. “I think you look handsome, Tyler. You’re growing up. You’re going to be as big as daddy soon.”

“It’s going to be a while before I’m THAT big. But I’m going to work on it. As soon as I’m allowed, I’m going to lift heavy too and put on ALL kinds of muscle.”

“Then you can go after bad people too. And beat them up and kill them when you have to.”

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” Tyler suggests. “Something tells me mummy might have an issue with that.”

“Why doesn’t mum just tell grandma to get lost?” TJ inquires. “It’s not like they like each other. They never have. They’ve always fought. I remember how they’d get into it at Christmas. When we were still living in Colorado. Grandma would get drunk and she’d pick fights with mum and mum would fight back and cry and then you’d go off on grandma. Is that going to happen this year? ‘Cause it’s been nice and quiet at Christmas. Do we HAVE to listen to grandma's shit?”

“What did I just tell your sister? About the language?”

“She’s five, but she’s right. It IS hard to stop and it does just come out. But do we, dad? Do we really have to put up with her?”

“It’s one night. I think you can manage. If I can grin and bear it, so can you. Suck it up.”

“If she starts in on mum about ANYTHING, I’m going to lose it. That’s my mum. No one talks to my mum like that. I almost taught Jacobi a lesson. For calling mum cute and wanting to ask her out. I’ll teach grandma a lesson too. I’m not afraid of her.”

“If anyone is going to teach her a lesson, it’s going to be me. You stay out of it. Your mum wouldn’t want you getting into it with her. You’re TEN.”

“Doesn’t matter how old I am. That’s MY mum. And no one is going to treat her bad. We’re supposed to protect her, remember? You and I.”

“You’re supposed to be a kid and stay that way as long as you can. I’M supposed to protect your mom. And I think I’ve been pretty damn good at it for the last twelve and a half years. And if your grandma starts? I’ll stop it. You don’t have to worry about that.”

“Why does she hate you so much anyway? Is it still the same crap? How she’s pissed because you stole mum away from her family and moved her all the way to Australia? ‘Cause you got her pregnant before you married her?”

Addie scowls. “Who cares? Lots of people have babies and they aren’t married. And so what if mummy didn’t go back home and she stayed with daddy? She’s an adult. She can do what she wants. And she wanted to be with daddy. None of grandma’s business. I’mma tell her that too. If she starts saying mean things about daddy or mummy. I’mma tell her what for.”

“You’re not going to do a thing,” Tyler informs her. “You’re going to leave all the telling off to me, got it?”

“I don’t like her,” Addie says. “She’s not a nice person. She has a mean smile. And her eyes are empty. They don’t sparkle or anything like that. Are you sure that’s mummy’s mummy? Because when mummy smiles, her eyes sparkle. She LOOKS happy. Grandma? She just looks mean.”

“No one likes her,” TJ grumbles. “Best thing we ever did was get away from her. But IS that why, dad? Is that really why she doesn’t like you? Because she still thinks you stole mum and took her all the way to Australia?”

“It’s a few things.”

“I bet it’s the job too. I bet she really has a problem with THAT.”

“Again…” Addie huffs dramatically. “...who cares? So what if daddy kills people? They’re BAD. They deserve it. He helps good people and sometimes when he’s helping them, he has to kill the bad guys. I don’t see a problem with that. If they try and hurt him or kill him, he HAS to kill them first. So he can come home. To us. And mummy. It only makes sense.”

“If Ads can get it, ANYONE can,” TJ says. “She’s only five. What’s grandma? A hundred? If a five year old can get it…”

“Daddy makes the world a better place because he gets rid of the bad people,” Addie continues, as she takes another sip of the drink her brother offers her. “If we had less bad people, everything would be great. There’d be less wars and less people getting hurt and everyone would love one another and be happy. Daddy’s doing a good thing. By sticking up for people. Like you do. At school. You beat up the bullies when you have to. Remember the older kid that tripped me and shoved my face in the mud? Remember him? He’s in grade eight AND you kicked the crap out of me. Because he picked on me.”

“You’re my sister. It’s my job to protect you.”

“And remember that other guy? On the playground by mummy’s store? The one that pulled my hair and told me I was adopted because I’m small and I don’t look like any of you guys. You freaked out on him and made him apologize and scared him away. He’ll cross the street now if he sees you coming.”

“You can’t let bad people get away with doing bad things,” TJ reasons. “If you don’t stop them, they’ll just keep doing bad stuff.”

“Exactly! So it’s a good thing that daddy goes after the bad guys. Grandma needs to learn. And she needs to learn TODAY. You should tell her, Tyler. You should tell her off. You’re not scared of anyone.”

“Not being scared of anyone or anything is not always a good thing,” Tyler informs her. “If you’re not scared, you don’t take a situation or people seriously. That’s when you get hurt. And you know what? No matter how big of a bad ass you think you are? There’s always a bigger one out there somewhere. Believe me. I’ve learned THAT lesson the hard way.”

“The guy who shot you just got a lucky one in,” TJ reasons. “You were already hurt. You weren’t one hundred percent. Some guy had already shot you, hadn’t he? A sniper?”

“What’s a sniper?” Addie inquires. “Is it like Swipper on Dora? Something like him?”

“We don’t need to talk about that,” Tyler says. “You don’t need to know that stuff. Not until you’re older. WAY older.”

“A sniper’s a guy that hides somewhere and shoots you,” TJ replies. “Somewhere where no one sees him. It’s why they’re so dangerous. You don’t even know where they are. They just shoot you. And they kill you before you even know what happened.”

“But daddy didn’t get killed. If a sniper shot daddy, shouldn’t he be dead?”

Combing his hand through her bangs, Tyler tips his daughter’s head back. “What did I just say? About you not needing to know about this stuff?”

“I’m curious now. Tyler said they hide and shoot people and kill them. How come you didn’t die? If a sniper shot you?”

“I guess he didn’t manage to get a good shot in.”

“It was the other guy that almost killed him,” TJ says, and takes a sip of the concoction in his hand. “The one that got him in the neck. That’s when he almost died. Mum saved him.”

“How? How did mummy save daddy? Daddy…” she swivels around in her stool to face him. “...how did mummy save you? Did she shoot the bad guy back?”

“Mum stuck her fingers in his neck,” TJ says. “To stop the bleeding. Or he would have bled to death.”

Addie’s eyes widen. “She DID?”

“When you’re older, MAYBE I’ll tell you more more about it. But for now…” Tyler places his hands on her shoulders and gently turns her back around. “...you don’t need to know this stuff. And you…” he stares pointedly at his son. “...don’t talk about this around her. She doesn’t need to know about this. She’s a baby still.”

“I’m not a baby!” Addie objects. “I’m five! I can almost ride my bike without training wheels. Babies can’t do that.”

“Just don’t, alright?” He addresses TJ. “Don’t talk about this stuff around her. Because she’s going to repeat all of this and she’s going to repeat it to your mum and that won’t end well. For you OR me.”

“It happened though. I mean, it’s part of how you guys met and got together and ended up getting married and stuff. It’s your history. I don’t see why…”

“I said ENOUGH. No more. Not around her. Got it?” He’s on edge; the mere mention of Dhaka and the incidents on the bridge playing straight into the anxiety and the panic he’d felt the night before; when he’d woken up from the nightmare and been on the verge of losing control and had turned to the fentanyl for relief. And it scares him; how easy it had been to not only access the powerful med, but actually take it. He’d encountered no resistance or hesitation; remorse and guilt not setting in until the following morning when he’d woken up and it had been the first thing on his mind. It’s alarming how quick things can return; an addict’s mind and behaviour.

Nodding, TJ holds his hands up in surrender.

“You’re both going to be nice tonight,” he says, and finishes Addie’s final braid. “To grandma. Because your mum is already stressed out enough and we don’t need to make it worse for her. So if the best you can do is smile and nod, just do that. I’m not asking you to kiss her ass. I’m just asking you to be civil. Can you handle that?”

TJ nods.

“You?” He tugs on one of Addie’s pigtails. “Can you do that? Be civil?”

“Do I have to be near her? Or sit on her lap? ‘Cause I draw the line there.”

“You don’t have to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. Just don’t be a little asshole, alright?”

“Me? I’m Mary Freaking Sunshine, remember? That’s what Grandpa Koen calls me.”

“Well then live up to it and be nice to your grandmother. Smile until your face hurts, got it?”

“What do I get out of it?”

He smirks.

“Mummy says to always negotiate. Never settle for the first offer. Can I sleep in the big bed tonight? For being nice to grandma?”

“No.” Wrapping an arm around her waist, he lifts her off the stool; pressing a kiss to her cheek before setting her on the ground.

She turns to face him. Head cocked to the side and one hand clutching her doll, the other planted firmly on her hip. “Can I have ice cream for my bedtime snack?”

"Maybe."

“Maybe isn’t good enough.”

“You ARE just like your mom, aren’t you.”

“I’ll be nice if I can have ice cream for my bedtime snack and you snuggle with me and draw on my back for half an hour. And that’s after FOUR stories.”

“You're bossy, you know that? Two stories.”

“Three. That’s as low as I’ll go.”

“I will give you two stories, ice cream for your snack, and forty five minutes of snuggling and drawing on your back. Instead of half an hour. We got a deal?”

Her eyes narrow as she considers it; nibbling on her bottom lip and swishing her hips back and forth. “You’re good at this.”

“This isn’t my first rodeo, Peanut. I’ve dealt with tougher than you. What do you say?” He offers a hand. “Deal?”

“Deal!” she agrees, his hand easily swallowing hers as they shake on it.

Grinning, he runs a hand over the top of her head and then drops a kiss on her hair. “You really DO have a lot of your mum in you.”

“Great things come in small packages,” Addie reasons, standing on her tiptoes as he leans down and pecks her lips. “Thank you, daddy!” she chirps. “My hair looks beautiful. You always do it perfect.”

“Pretty hard not to when my subject is so cute. Good thing I married your mum, huh? So I could have a kid as cute as you?”

“You really are a lucky man!” she declares and then cheerfully skips out of the room.

“I hope grandma is on her best behaviour,” TJ says, as he finishes the drink in his hand and then slides off the stool and returns it to its place at the island. “Because if she DOES start on mum, it’s going to be a wild night. I really hope she watches her step.”

“My too, kiddo,” Tyler sighs, and reaches out to tousle his son’s hair. “Me too.”

[cpunkhobie]

Out of the c!bench trio whos fashion do you like the most/ what do you think the bench trio wears?

ranboo wears button ups and sweaters and has a collection of sweater vests because Soft and Warm and Cozy and its fun to pick at the collars of the button up shirts. he has a bunch of different blazers and button ups, like, thats the only thing he wears. different patterned collar shirts take up 87% of his wardrobe. theres just a fucking formal attire white collar button up next to an oversized flamingo hawaiian shirt. how did he get here, he doesnt know, theyre everywhere. tubbo bought him a really nice black button up which is like silky on the inside and is super soft on the outside. its very flexible and easy to move in. tommy tailored it so its the one piece of clothing he has that fits him perfectly. ranboo wears it all the time its the equivalent of that one jacket you can never take off

tommy wears exclusively sweaters, cardigans, and the same 2 interchanging tshirts (one is a plain red short sleeve and the other is the Classic Tommyinnit shirt.) he has a sweatshirt that he stole from wilbur that he used to wear a lot but lately its just been.. sitting in his closet. he also has a zip-up hoodie that puffy got him post-revival. it was the first thing he put on that wasnt the ghost sweater youd get after being revived. its nice, he hung up on his wall

tubbo has a lot of really baggy sweatshirts but his closet is mostly made up of a bunch of misc clothes that hes collected over the years. he wakes up and pretty much just throws on whatever works. i also have no fucking clue how to make a design for him, but i know his wardrobe has a lot of earth tones and every now that just this very nice shade of yellow, pink, red, or blue

i want ranboos tbh