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#i like reading my thoughts back to myself which is like. kind of weird
m00ngbin · 8 months
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I feel like barf and I spent a bunch of time stress studying for a bunch of exams that are two months to a year away so I can't say that my commentary is going to be spectacular and everything that these next two chapters deserve but by god I'm going to try and that's all that I really need to do anyways
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pepprs · 1 year
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misery despair suffering etc etc
#purrs#delete later#two thoughts about separate things both causing the despair. thought / thing number 1 which i think ive talked abt on here many times before#but im saying it again: i am not good at being a friend in the ways my friends need me to be a friend. and in the ways friendship is thought#of societally i guess. i isolate myself constantly. i pull away from the opportunity to get closer with people i don’t know as well. i don’t#text back and then when im finally ready it’s been so egregiously long since it was appropriate for me to respond or reciprocate or#whatever it is i am so crushed by guilt and shame and embarrassment that i can’t bring myself to do it. i have so many unread messages and i#wont even let myself open them. and ive been like this for years. and i hurt someone very badly many years ago by being that way. and it was#more complicated than that but sometimes i remember it and how i acted and how i treated them. and i wonder sometimes if they check up on me#and i don’t want to be immature or weird or whatever for talking about it or wondering that openly. but if you do read this and you know who#you are: i am so sorry. i meant whst i said that i would never stop wishing you well and hoping the very best for you. and i hope you have#all of that and more. and im so sorry for not being brave enough to communicate with you or stick around. i really really am. and im sorry#to all the other people i have hurt by pulling away and shutting down and shrinking inside myself and not talking. ik it’s weird to post#that instead of just telling people directly but it’s the guilt. i am fully aware of how many people / groups of people i owe things to /#for but also just… miss. a lot. and want to talk to even though i won’t let myself. i don’t know why im like this and i don’t know how to#stop. but im sorry im not a good friend or even acquaintance or community member. and im talking to everyone now i guess including anyone#reading this bc god knows how many asks and messages i have on here. im sorry. i want to be a better friend. but i also never have spoons. a#and i also want to stay spoonless and cocooned on myself forever and never come out. and i hate that. i want to be a friend. i want to be#kind and giving and loving and generous in the ways you all have been with me. i want to hang out with people and send messages and be there#to lift people up and celebrate with them. but all i can muster is tapping like on social media and it’s horrific. i have gifts to make and#hello / checking in messages to reply to and roleplay starters to post and i just can’t do it right now and im scared i’ll never be able to#again. but it’s a self fulfilling prophecy. if i say i can’t do it then iwont. it’s not enougu to just be aware of it i have to act on it#and change it. but im exhausted and hurting right now and i have been for years and i need to heal first but what if this is healing.#idk. i rambled on that for much longer than i thought i would so nowim gonna say the second thing in a separate post. and it’ll be weird to#post about that in light of this and it’ll be weird to post this at all. but its been weighing on me so heavily today and i don’t want#anyone to think im ignoring them or not aware of being like this or whatever. and posting into the void is easier than telling individual#people to your faces even though i know it’s cowardly. im really truly sorry. i will try to get better once i have the strength to try.#actually yeah no not gonna say the second thing yet. it would be weird to say it now. this needs to sit a little first
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sherbetyy · 11 months
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i feel like. i want to ramble a bit i guess. about things people don’t really care about but i’m a usually a silly billy on the blog so i don’t want to break that vibe so i don’t know.
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viulus · 9 months
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Finally tried out Ghost Trick tonight
#vu's posts#i downloaded a bunch of demos for interesting-looking games to my switch last month#and that was one of them... it's weird because despite being a long-time ace attorney fan i never thought to check this game out#but honestly? so far it's really good. and no joke i kept saying 'oh yeah i can *see* the shu takumi writing style here'#i really enjoyed great ace attorney (which he also wrote) a year and a half back so i think i'll really enjoy this too#i also tried out... spiritfarer... hyrule warriors... and octopath traveler 2. couldn't get into any of them honestly.#SF falls into the 'cozy' game genre... and i fucking hate that genre. it's so boring.#i could talk about my disdain for that genre as a whole some more 🤢 but i will spare everyone reading this.#hyrule warriors was a letdown because... i guess i just dislike that style of gameplay?#this was my first time trying a dynasty warriors-type game... and i had a feeling that i wouldn't like it. it's a shame i was right though#and as for octopath traveler... i think i'm willing to give it more of a chance? but at the same time...#It's a turn-based jrpg. and between p5 and pokemon i'm kind of burnt out on that genre#i want to give it another chance because i might actually really enjoy the writing... but idk if i can tolerate the jrpg gameplay 😬#OH#i also started on alan wake and death's door last month... so far so good on both.#AW is one of those games that my bslur 1 was OBSESSED with when i was younger. so that's been my connection to it for years#never thought that i'd care about it at all but.. yeah it's actually pretty good so far#death's door is hella fun so far... it was slow at first but i'm really enjoying myself with it now#but yeah. i'm gonna go to bed now... que tenga una buena noche 👋
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isabelguerra · 2 years
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i dont have an actual name for it but depressed college au is probably one of my favorites. i dont really care for the adults in paranatural and thinking about how the activity club/others might grow up and continue their lives is so much more interesting to me
#i started reading this comic when i was 15? i think? and now im recently 23. i cant really say i relate or want to relate to 12 year olds an#y more. and yeah i prefer a lot more nuance and complexity when crafting+ reading stories#but when your protags are 12. well. yeah pass#pnats adults are fine but the kids are the ones i have any actual emotional interest or compulsion towards#so when i write something that might be less 'yippee whimsical wacky adventures' and the options are spender and zarei. again theyre fine bu#t i dont really care enough about spender and zarei#but i still want to write about adults you know. BEING 12 was hard enough you could not PAY me to go back into that headspace#honestly thats actually why most of wizard au takes place in their later school years#like you know those aged up mob psycho 100 aus. where mob is like a fireman and ritsu is an english major and theyre not exactly having epic#adventures anymore but theyre coming into themselves etc. god. thats the stuff 2 me#i used to hate aged up aus as a teenager bc i thought it was the author/artists excuse to put kids in weird situations. and idk considering#it was 2015. yeah fair. but i do think i get it now. teenage years are hard and theres a certain part of that hardness that i love. things#like growing up [from a 17yo perspective] and people you love going to college and trying to find yourself and dealing w friends and fear#for the future. THOSE are the kind of teen stories i like reading about. but when you start getting tired and mellowing out and things that#come with the end of college and grad school and growing up [from a 22yos perspective] is similar. but its more somber. youre older now#when the protagonists become people. thats what i like#wizard au is fun as a huge intense magical adventure project but depressed college au is just like. where i can project.#drinking an entire pack of mikes hard lemonade by myself and lying on the floor talking to friends about how im scared and pushing myself#towards a career that i love but dont know i can achieve. friends leaving. getting an apartment for the first time. and the second and#the third. that feels better when i can sit down and go 'okay. someday isabel will do this too. i might not understand. my friends might not#understand. nobody could understand and i could be alone. but max woke up with a hangover today and i know what that feels like' etc#idk just feels better. taking your favorite characters with you while you go through things. by which i mean#'taking my favorite characters and making them go through things'#you want them to be safe and happy and having fun. i want them to feel fear. we both know what we want from fiction and treasure each#depressed college au#dcau
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prettycottagequeer · 6 months
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ok maybe I'm a little late to this BUT I'm gonna do a to-do list motivation thingy because I've had the worst two weeks since I started college :)
SO these I should start on asap:
50 I make the snack I really want but I haven't had the motivation to make
100 I clean my dorm. another thing I've been meaning to do for a week
150 I do the presentation about mid-victorian fashion I've been putting off (due Monday)
200 I start memorizing the monologue that was due a week ago (now due Tuesday)
these can wait longer:
300 I spend time outside. It's so nice but I'm getting stuck scrolling because I feel like shit. vicious cycle ect
500 I start setting a better weekend routine (aka getting up before noon)
1k I start working out again. I was doing a routine to get more masc and build muscle and I liked it but life hit me like Crowley driving the Bentley and I've missed like 3 weeks
2k I buy my first binder. I've been coping with sports bras for almost a year now and I haven't been able to justify spending $50+ on a binder even though I know I'd love it and use it everyday.
Do I tag people? I don't know but I'm going to. @the-globe-theatre-maggot @weirdly-specific-but-ok @howmanyholesinswisscheese
here's just some context if you want to read, feel free to skip. some of this I've talked about in the maggot server, some I haven't, but I really just need a place for this to go that's out of my head. tw homophobia, transphobia, car crash(??)
How I Have Been Run Over By The Bentley Going 90 In Central London What Feels Like 50 Times In The Last Two Weeks
I'm going to college about 4 hours away from my parents, and it's been really nice. They.. suck, to say the least. transphobic/homophobic ect, super traditional conservative catholic, racist, all of it. so i tried to move somewhere where I wouldn't have to think about them and I could be myself and do what I can to be happy. March 1st was the start of my spring break, which meant going home because the dorms close. I was already not excited, but I was prepared. the problem with being away from home is I forget just how bad they are. My optimism gets the better of me and I think maybe this time they'll be better. so I decided to not hide my septum piercing.
that was a mistake. it starts a whole fight where they say we know you're trans, you're actually a girl and you always will be, we have the bones argument, they think I'm being influenced by demons or something (if only they knew about crowley) because I want to change my name, and they tell me that going on t will completely ruin my body and give me cancer and other things. They're also mad about my dyed hair, septum, and general style, and say I'm setting a terrible example for my (5) younger siblings and make it a point to tell me just how much of a disappointment I am. I think I'm pretty cute and fun but y'know, whatever. very fun time. I lie so much, don't give them any more details about my identity, and say I'm not planning to go on t to save my ass. which is all on instinct which makes me feel worse because if I'm really trans I should be able to stand up for that, right? maybe I'm faking the dysphoria.
the next morning I wake up really sick, and spend the rest of the week sick and feeling like shit because I'm home and back in the same place and situation I was a year ago that I thought I escaped. at one point I pretty much lose my voice but also kind of get gender euphoria from it. it's weird.
On Friday it's time for me to drive back 4 hours to school, and I make it about 3/4 of the way when google maps takes me on a random gravel road and I crash my car, really crash my car, like sideways-in-a-ditch-windows-broken-crawling-up-out-the-door crash it in the middle of nowhere. (I was fully paying attention to the road, it was raining and super slick) I call my parents because I have no one else to call and I sit in a Subway for 3 hours while they drive to get my car. when they get there they're (understandably) really mad, and they tell me that I'm not mature enough to be going to school so far away and I need to get my shit together and stop depending on them. which. is probably true. but made me feel even more stupid about the fact that I crashed my car. I get back to school and I'm still Very Sick with no energy or motivation to do anything. So I've spent the last week trying to get better and honestly to do anything. it hasn't really worked. I'm a lot better health-wise (Not emotionally), still sick but I have a lot of work due, so I really need a push to get started
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daydreams-after-dark · 3 months
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Good things come in small packages
Part 1 | Part 2
Pairing: Mini Han x fem reader
Synopsis: One year ago you purchased a ‘miniature companion’ named Hannie. He’s the size of a Ken doll but alive and horny. But something unexpected happens on your one year anniversary.
Word count: approx 2k
A/n: Hey!!! It's finally here! My Mini Han oneshot (posted in a couple of instalments because I get too excited to share). The idea for Mini Han was born through a conversation with my girl @noellllslut (we always have the most unhinged thoughts). Then I wrote a little "imagining" here (which I’ve incorporated into this fic anyway, so you don’t have to read), which then sparked quite a bit curiosity amongst you sweet/filthy readers. Questions came, and I felt compelled to explore more of this theme.
I hope you enjoy this little fic. It's sweet and smutty, and as I kept writing, I fell in love with our dear y/n and Mini Hannie. I want one for myself tbh.
CW below the cut
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CW: supernatural themes, oral sex, sexual acts, sexual themes, voyeurism
You've had your miniature human, Hannie, for almost a year?! You realize, sitting at your work desk as you look at your desktop calendar. You smile and make a note to organize a celebration for just the two of you, and to buy a cheesecake for dessert. Hannie loves cheesecake. Your smile grows. He always manages to get it all over him, then wants to get it all over you so he can lick it off you.
One year this coming weekend. It feels like time has flown, yet at the same time it feels like he’s been part of your life forever. Your heart bursts as you think back to how it all came to be.
You had been lonely. You'd broken up with your long term boyfriend and was feeling sad one night. So you went online to doom scroll, and online shop. You expected you'd end up down a rabbit hole of cat memes and be $500 down in shoe purchases, but instead an ad appeared on your screen.
"Miniature human companions" it said, with images of very attractive men. Miniature men. Were they human? Couldn't be. Were they robots? Probably. They must be really expensive to make which is why they are so small, you'd decided.
You were intrigued, so you researched the company, finding that this new type of 'companion' utilizes cutting edge technology that simulates actual human behavior and bodily functions.
By 4am you'd chosen your companion. His name was Han. He was adorable and attractive, with fluffy black hair and pouty lips, and from the personality trait notes, he sounded like a lot of fun.
"Pay Now". You can still remember the feeling of excitement that ran through you as hit the button to complete your purchase.
When he arrived, he came in a box with air holes, which you found kind of weird considering he didn't actually breathe oxygen. You set the box on your kitchen table, took a deep breath and lifted the lid. You gasped as you peered inside.
A little man, about the size of a Ken doll, sat on a blanket eating miniature crisps out of a miniature chip bag.
"Oh hello!" he looked up at you. "Are you my Noona?" he waved excitedly.
Holy fucking shit. You almost fainted as you stumbled to sit down on a dining chair.
You knew he was meant to talk, but he just seemed so real as he chewed his food then licked the seasoning off his lips like he could actually taste it. His little chest moved with his breath, like he was really breathing. Could he do everything a human can do? You wondered.
"My name’s Hannie." He said standing up and brushing the crumbs off his trousers.
"Um...I-I'm Y/n..." you stuttered, trying to process what you were witnessing,
"You're really pretty, Y/n." He beamed up at you with a gummy grin.
You prepared him a little space of his own, with a makeshift bed, clothing that you had also ordered from the company you purchased him from, and bought a set of Barbie sized cups, plates and furniture. You even bought him a Barbie Dreamhouse to live in, but he preferred to just climb up your full sized furniture and use that.
You studied the information manual that came with him and learned that he could in fact, experience life just as a human did. He needed to eat, sleep, wash, poop. Oh and he could get erections and ejaculate. Wow!
Over the next weeks and months you'd gotten yourselves into a routine, and became really close. He was your best friend. You did everything together, mostly staying at home. You assumed he was some sort of AI, and that's why you got along so well, but the longer he was with you, the more his own interests came to the surface. Like singing and Anime.
He helped you bake, often getting himself covered in flour and other ingredients. You'd watch movies together. Most nights you'd lay on the couch and he'd lay face down on your chest while you watched your favorites. Sometimes you'd feel him get hard against the curve of your breast, and you'd think inappropriate thoughts about him. You'd grow wet between your legs and wish he was able to touch you.
He loved it when you’d brush his hair with a tiny little hairbrush and sit him on your benchtop in the bathroom when you’re getting ready for the day. You know he loved it when you forgot he was there one time and you took a shower in front of him. He got so hard watching you soap up your body.
Sometimes you'd take him out on a picnic somewhere secluded near the ocean so he could freely move about the picnic blanket without fear of being seen. Or he'd sneak into your work bag and scare the shit out of you when you were working.
In the early days, you'd occasionally go on dates with actual men. Mostly to take your mind of your growing feelings for Hannie. You'd bring them home and fuck them in your bed, knowing he was somewhere watching, listening. You'd imagine him getting hard from your noises, and it made you moan even louder just picturing it. You'd imagine it was Hannie inside you too, pounding hard into your cunt, and making you come on his cock.
He was distant with you in the days after. He’d sit around sulking and pouting.
"What's wrong, Hannie?" You asked him after he’d ignored you for three days.
"Noona... it's just…I get so jealous of them." He burst into tears. "I want to do things like that to you. I want to the be the one who makes you come." He sobbed.
Things changed after that. You no longer went out with other men, and you and your miniature companion began to explore a more physical, more sexual, relationship.
From letting you see each other naked, to mutual masturbation, to eventually touching each other and making each other come.
You soon learned that even though Hannie is small, he is extremely talented with his mouth, and he can make you come harder than anyone had ever before.
One morning he noticed that you were still asleep, and very naked. The way you were laying, legs splayed out looked so inviting to him. You’d kicked your blanket off at some point. He couldn’t help himself.
You woke up to a sensation between your legs, and when you looked down you saw him kneeling between your your legs, using his arms to push your pussy lips open and doing his very best to lap at your clit.
“Hannie?” You whimpered. He stopped for a moment to stand up and wave at you, the entire front of his body dripping with your arousal. “I’ve just found my favorite thing to do!” He said enthusiastically and then he was back to being buried against your pussy.
These days, at night time he’ll climb up onto your chest while you’re lying in bed watching videos on your phone. He still loves to nestle against the bulge of your breasts, especially if you’re in a loose satin camisole, and he’ll slide himself under the fabric.
“What do you want to watch, Hannie?” You’ll ask him.
“Porn!” He’ll answer excitedly. The phone is like a giant screen to him and it’s never long before you feel him shimmying his clothes off and rubbing his little swollen erection against your skin.
He’s such a desperate little thing that you let him do whatever he needs to get himself off. Often, he’ll rub his cock along your bottom lip while he humps your tits, or he’ll scramble to suck on your nipple. He does his best to stretch his mouth around it, while he grinds against you and cumming on your soft skin. Then he’ll pass out right there. Poor little tyke gets himself tired.
Some of the kinkier things he gets you to do include tying him up and edging him until his cock becomes so painfully red and engorged that he’s crying. His naked body is delicious to look at, and you love to run the pad of your index finger over his muscles. He’s perfectly toned, his skin honey brown, and his cock is mouth-wateringly big for his frame.
He’s rendered helpless as you stroke your finger gently up and down his body. Then, using the tip of your tongue, you lick his cock carefully whilst shoving your pinky finger into his mouth.
There are times when you’ll dress up in lingerie covered in buckles and straps and he’ll climb up your body like he’s doing some kind of adventure hike. He gets so sweaty and very hard as he explores the terrain of your body.
He really is the perfect companion.
You are broken from your thoughts by your alarm signaling it's time to go home from work, and you hurry home to see your Hannie.
_____________
"Fuck! Hannie! Please... need to come...need one more...please. Don't stop." You pant. It's later that evening, and you're on the verge of your third orgasm with Hannie between your thighs sucking expertly on your clit. He's got your lips spread open as far as he can manage, and he's grinding against your core seeking his own release. Inside your pussy you've got your vibrator egg on full intensity. "Yes!!! Yes...coming!!!" You cry as you arch off the bed as you come all over him.
He quickly climbs up your body, almost slipping off because he’s covered in so much of your cream, and kneels on your chest to pump his cock until he’s spurting cum onto your tongue.
“Tastes so good, Hannie.” You show him your empty tongue, but he’s already collapsed across your body.
You clean him up and put him in his striped pajamas, before you both nestle into bed. You’re used to him sleeping on the pillow next to you now, although it took you a while to stop worrying you’d roll on him in the night.
“Noona? Did you know that tomorrow it’ll be one year since I came here?” He says sleepily.
You roll onto your side and smile. “Yes, actually I do, honey. Have a think about what you’d like to do to celebrate, okay. Anything you want."
He nods. “Yeah, I’ll think about it. But just so you know, it’ll involve me being buried in your pussy.”
—��——-
Han laid back on the pillow. What would he like to do to celebrate? He’d love to celebrate by being inside you. Properly. Fully.
He wishes he could do the things he'd seen those men you’d do to you all those months ago. To pin your legs up and fuck you so hard the bed would shake. He takes his mind back to when he’d hide on your shelf and watch, fucking into his hand and holding back tears of despair.
What would it be like to bend you over and fuck you from behind? What would it even be like to fuck you at all? He wants to know so bad.
But he does have a special relationship with you, he supposes. Not every guy has to stretch his mouth around a nipple or clit like he has to. Can those men be covered head to toe in your juices? Or lay completely across the bulge of your boob. No. They can’t. Only he can.
He pouts to himself.
He knows he’s got it good, you are his everything. But as he lays on the pillow next you and closes his eyes, he wonders if he’s enough for you? Could you give up real men forever, with real sized cocks that can stretch you out and fill you deep? Would you be okay with never having a boyfriend you could take out in public, or take to family events, or be seen with?
Could you settle for him? A miniature version of a man?
He sighs. "Goodnight, Noona. Love you." He whispers as he leans over and gives your giant lips a kiss.
"Goodnight, my sweet Hannie. I love you too." you reply sleepily.
As he drifts off to sleep he wishes what he always wishes. That he could be human sized and be with you like a proper human.
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The morning sun peeks through your window, landing on your face and causing you to stir. You groan and try to stretch, but a heaviness across your middle keeps you in place. You peer down to find a man's arm wrapped around you, snuggling you tight.
Fear courses through your body, and you scream as you fling the arm off and jump out bed. You grab your lamp, ready to hit the intruder.
"Noona?" The man lifts his head, his dark locks falling around his face.
Your eyes almost pop out of your head when you see the confused look on his face. "Hannie!?" You choke, hands poised to strike.
"Noona? What are you doing?" he peers down at the pillow his head had been resting on, and then down the bed toward his feet. "Why is your bed so small?"
"Hannie?" You whisper, lowering the lamp, letting it drop to the floor.
"Why is everything so small? Wait. Why am I naked? Noona, have you been playing with me in my sleep?" He looks up at you confused and worried. "Noona, why are you looking at me like that?"
His eyes land on his pajamas, torn to shreds next to him. He picks up the scrap of fabric that was his pajama top, and his eyes widen. "Why are my clothes so tiny?"
"Hannie," you take in the man before you, naked and taking up most of the bed. "You're big."
To be continued…
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@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itsseohannbin @weareapackofstrays @3rachasdomesticbanana @palindrome969 @xxkissesforchanniexx @chuuchuu1224 @fun-fanfics @rhonnie23 @jisunglyricist @strayywayy @armystay89 @igetcarriedawaywithyou @mylittleponeypinkrosieposie @kyunchoni @justforreaders @melochacco @scenuniverse @oddracha @ismokeeweed @galaxycatdrawz @jiminssluttyminx @teddy-stay @kayleefriedchicken @imperfectlyperfectprincess1
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schattenhonig · 5 months
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The A in LGBTQIA+ doesn't stand for aspec because they're not repressed!
(please read the disclaimer at the end of this post)
Ummm, excuse me? Would you mind telling me what your definition of repression is, then?
Because I feel repressed when a doctor asks me about my sex life, and if I say I have none, it gets marked down as a symptom without being asked if I suffer from it.
I feel repressed when my gyn tells me I can't get a hysterectomy yet despite losing so much blood on every period that I need to take iron supplements all the time, because I could change my mind about not wanting children (which is a whole other post, I know, but it's most likely linked to sex).
I feel repressed if I can't use dating apps or platforms because my sexuality doesn't even exist there, and the one time I tried, I got called names because I didn't want to meet for because it was clear where this date would go, despite my explicit "what I'm looking for".
I feel repressed when I think about how recently a paragraph was finally abolished in my country that considered sex a vital part of a marriage, basically entitling the spouses to having sex with their partner (both gender neutral, because entitling people to having sex with somebody else by law is wrong. It's basically a rape permission).
I feel repressed when I can't watch any film or show without it being about love and/or sex, no matter if it fits the narrative and furthers the plot.
I feel repressed when I plot my own stories and automatically put a romantic couple in there as main characters, even though I have no idea why this would be important for the plot. Not even my own stories, my own thoughts are mine.
I felt repressed when I was asked accusingly in a relationship if I wasn't missing something before I even knew asexuality as a spectrum was a thing, and having to lie about this being a side effect of my medication instead of genuinely not feeling attracted to someone in this way.
I feel repressed when I can't tell people I'm not sexually attracted to them because they will take this personally no matter how well I explain myself.
I feel repressed when everywhere I look there's advertising relying on naked skin, suggestive posing and objectification. Why are expensive cars still presented by women considered beautiful and tempting? It's not like that's necessary to convince people of spending so much money on a thing that gets you from A to B. Couches with women in smart dresses and high heels. That's not what a normal person looks like on a couch. But the worst is a truck in the town where I live: it's from a small fruit and vegetable stand, so whenever I see it, it comes from the warehouse, delivering groceries. On it is a woman clad in very little, presenting fruit. I'm sorry, but why? Does a misogynistic picture convince you of the necessity to avoid scurvy?
I feel repressed when I tell people and get the answer "you just haven't found the right person yet", because there are two possible assumptions from that point: I'm either not trying hard enough (so it's basically my own fault) or something about me is not right, appalling even (which circles back to I'm not trying hard enough or frames me as a victim of my genetics, upbringing or circumstances to be pitied).
Do not tell me how I feel. Do not try to tell me everything is fine and I shouldn't complain or ask for acknowledgement if everywhere I look, I'm reminded of how odd, how weird and how not normal I am. How much it inconveniences you to even acknowledge my existence, let alone respect any of my traits, views and choices.
And while I can only write from my own asexual point of view, I wrote this with all kinds of flavours of aspec in mind, so I'm explicitly including aromantics, aroace people and every shade of the spectrum in this. Not all my examples may apply to you, but I hope you can find something to relate to.
ETA: please feel free to add your own experiences of repression!
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bvidzsoo · 4 months
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Above the world
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Author: bvidzsoo
Pairing: Jeong Yunho x female reader
🕸️Warning: cursing, mentions of murder and robbery, wounds, slightly suggestive 🕸️Word count: 25.6k 🕸️Rating: nc-17 🕸️Genre: Spiderman!AU, Marvel & DC references, superheroes!AU, strangers to lovers!AU, highschool!AU 🕸️Summary: Moving to a new city due to your mother's psychotic ex-fiancé, you thought the past wouldn't catch up with you, but it does. You're an outcast at your new highschool until a tall and dorky guy approaches you and decides to be your friend. Oh, and did I mention there's also this weird superhero kinda guy in the city who calls himself Spiderman? And why does he kind of remind you of your new friend?
A/N: Lovelies, it's finally here!! I've been planning to write this story for at least two months now, I just didn't have the time for it, but it's here at last! Few things I'd like to quickly point out: 1. I hope the humor I used isn't a miss as once again I wanted to explore something new and used a different writing style, 2. they are in highschool but it's not cringe, I promise (I haven't written a highschool setting in ages lol), 3. I used some terms that are skateboard related and so, I'll leave a little glossary of what those mean below! ^^ (I hope I managed to describe these well) (I hate the fact that I didn't incorporate the famous "hold on tight spider-monkey" line, but it is what it is lol) Sorry if there are any mistakes, I do proofread but it's super late rn and my brain might not pick up on all the mistakes! :') Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoy this little (not so little) story, and your feedback is always super welcome, they inspire me to write even more lol! divider
⎊ (I have an Iron Man!Mingi oneshot, if you're interested! ^^)
🕸️360: a complete skateboard and body rotation performed either frontside or backside 🕸️180: a half skateboard and body rotation performed either frontside or backside 🕸️alley-oop: an aerial transition trick in which the skater moves his body sideways in the opposite direction of the rotating movement 🕸️backside: a trick or turn executed with the skater's back facing the ramp coping or the obstacle 🕸️alley-oop backside 50-50 grind 🕸️540 backside 🕸️airwalk: an aerial trick in which the skater grabs the nose of the board, kicks the feet out while in the air, and then quickly back on when he's about to land it 🕸️ollie: a trick in which the skater uses his or her feet to pull the skateboard up into the air 🕸️backside nose slip 🕸️frontside boneless 🕸️Casper Flip: a trick in which the skater performs a half-flip and then uses the back foot to grab the tail and whip it
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            Despite the unfamiliarity of the dimly lit street, there was something very comforting and—quite familiar—about this new place. Perhaps I couldn’t call it home just yet—given that it’s barely my second day here—but there was something cozy about the wet ground shimmering underneath the glimmering streetlamps that did little to nothing to light up all corners of the—otherwise—dark street. Not many are out at this hour, and it’s not because it’s too late, it’s the fact that my mother and I managed to find ourselves—barely— a modest little house, in probably one of the dodgiest parts of this, new, promising, and quite huge city. I wouldn’t call it the slums—I’ve seen worse places compared to this one—but the eerily empty street could make anyone run back inside their house upon nightfall. And, well, I get it—if it weren’t for my favourite music blasting through my wired—probably from the Stone Age—earphones, I probably would’ve found myself scurrying back home as well. But for once, I didn’t mind the cool breeze of air that’s settled upon the city after the rain that came out of nowhere. It was autumn, but the leaves haven’t started falling down just yet. It was the perfect timing for me to join my new high-school, not that there was ever a good timing, per se, I always thought a newcomer would remain just that—a newcomer. And while I didn’t have had to move towns in quite a while now, I still remembered what kind of treatment would be waiting for me tomorrow.
The new girl in school. Everyone would be eager tomorrow to get to know me, to talk to me, to try and befriend me. And me—well, I had nothing against all that—but deep down I just really wished to remain unseen, and most importantly, unbothered. I have never considered myself a very sociable person, and later than sooner, people would realize that and they would finally leave me alone. I don’t have many friends for this exact reason, and the one I do have moved to Spain a long time ago, our phones now the only way to keep in touch—my mother finally saw the important of me being on my phone so often. But it was fine, I didn’t mind the distance, however, there were days when I wished we could hang out, go on small trips, enjoy each other’s company. Nayoung had promised to visit soon, but we both knew she was too busy with her life over in Spain for that to happen anytime soon, and I didn’t have it in myself to pester her about the promise she made.
The neighbourhood my mother and I had moved to wasn’t too far from the heart of the city—and while one would expect it to be lively and bright, it was anything but that—even during the daytime. People seemed to avoid making eye contact and they hung their heads low around here, barely muttering even as much as a greeting if you crossed paths with them down the wide street, even if they were your neighbours. The houses, too, seemed to be silent at all times, no little children screaming and laughing or playing outside, no rowdy teenagers blasting music and getting yelled at for not doing their homework. It was odd, but it was only temporal—well, that is if my mother manages to land herself a better paying job so that we can move away from here. These houses were closely pressed up against each other, back gardens rather—inexistent. Our house just so happened to be neighbouring a huge building—offices, someone had told us—but for what business, we didn’t know. And probably wouldn’t want to know.
I’ve seen some roughed-up people come and go from the beaten-up building. The narrow alleyway just so happened to be a dead-end between our house and this building, and my mother had been debating whether she should place bars outside on my window as it just so happened to be facing this small alleyway. It wasn’t as dark as one would expect it to be, but a barely lit-up streetlamp did a shitty job at fully illuminating it.
I bobbed my head to the music, humming—hopefully—quietly to myself as I skipped down the road, almost splashing myself in the process as I failed to notice a rather deep looking puddle. I chuckled as I narrowly missed it and threw the plastic bag over my right shoulder—completely forgetting I had eggs in there. With an alarmed expression, I scrambled to hold the plastic bag normally and peeked inside, letting out a sigh in relief upon seeing that the eggs were completely fine, not one cracked. I knew my mother would make me walk back to the small convenience store—which was probably about to close up—and I really just wanted to watch my anime—the one I had seen about five hundred times, but who cares?! Some people tend to cling to that what brings them the most comfort, and this anime was like that for me. However, just as the chorus of the song blasted through my earphones, I cleared my throat, ready to mouth the lyrics as I remained alone on the street, when I felt a harsh tug on my right arm. And when I didn’t react to it straight away, I was pushed forward, stumbling through a puddle and splashing my new white Vans.
“Oh, come on, man!” I snapped, frowning down at my, now, dirty shoes, “I just got these yesterday!”
As I turned and went to pull out the earphone from my left ear, I was met with a sight that I wasn’t exactly expecting. Well, to be fair, I thought a kid or an asshole had run into me on purpose, but—having a metal gun almost pressing into my forehead certainly wasn’t what I was expecting—what a way to greet your new neighbour on their second day of living here!
“Empty your pockets!” The tall man, dressed in all black—typical—hissed as I managed to pull out both of my earphones while moving slowly, “And give me everything that’s pricey.”
Well, jokes on him, I didn’t have anything pricey on myself…well, except for my phone, “I don’t really have that many pockets, man.”
I pulled my cardigan’s pockets out, showing the robber that I really had nothing inside, “Look, man, if you think you are broke?! Just look at me! You are really out here trying to rob a broke high-school student—”
“Shut up!” The man snapped, and I froze as the barrel of his gun was now forcefully pressing against my forehead. Uh, yeah, if there’s one thing I totally suck at—well, it’s shutting the hell up when needed, “Give me your rings! Now!”
My eyebrows furrowed and I looked down at my hands, scowling as I realized I was wearing all of my favourite rings. Like hell was I giving them to this dude!
“Honestly, I got these from some antique shop for the cheapest price ever,” I huffed, raising the plastic bag between us and trying to ignore the way my heartbeat picked up when the man’s eyes narrowed, gun pressing just a little bit harder against my cold skin—okay, I have started sweating, “But you can totally take this bag! Like, man, it’s all yours, really! I’m not even hungry anymore! My mom’s hot dogs can wait for another day, you can have it, man.”
“What the fuc—” But before the man could even finish his sentence, he was gone. Like—gone. Whisked away, or some shit. I stood there, dumbfounded, mouth gaping and blinking at nothing. I swear, the man was in front of me a second ago and now he’s—not anymore? I gulped, squeezing the plastic bag to my chest—disregarding the fact that I could crack the eggs—and slowly looked around, now finally acknowledging the fact that I was really panicking. What do you mean I was being threatened a second ago at gunpoint and now that motherfucker disappeared into thin air?! Did I inhale something sketchy when I passed those two dudes in front of the convenience store? Was I hallucinating now? Has the trauma induced by my mother’s ex finally caught up to me, ready to torment me? Am I going to—the soft thump in front of me made me freeze as I slowly moved my eyes from the sky towards where I heard the sound come from and—yeah, I screamed.
“Hey, hey, wait!” Whatever that thing was called out, making my eyes widen as I accidentally stumbled back, certainly about to fall into a puddle, but—a web shot out towards me from that thing’s wrist and caught me mid-air, gently stabilizing me, “Hey, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m not here to hurt you! I just—saved you, actually.”
The sound—well, voice—coming from underneath that thing’s—man’s—mask was boyish and a little bit distorted, but I could hear its—his—tone very well, still. It was soft and sounded rather concerned. Having realized that I was still gaping towards this—something—with my heart practically in my throat, I closed my mouth and blinked furiously, trying to clear my head as I shook my body in case this was a dream—it seemed like the perfect moment to wake up, before it could turn even weirder.
“Okay,” The masked thing—man, guy, whatever—mused, clearly sounding amused now, “I’ve never seen anyone react like that to Spiderman, actually.”
“A spider what?” I asked confused, eyebrows furrowing as I held onto the bag even tighter. For a moment, there was complete—awkward—silence.
“Spiderman?” The person sounded unsure as they scratched their nape, its mask blinking. I jumped, allowing my eyes to fully take in this—creature?! Why did it look like a real man if they called themselves a Spiderman?! As if all that wasn’t enough, the person was tall enough to loom over my form in its red and blue glory, the costume moulding against their lean and—softly—muscular body, looking like a second skin, almost. The design was intricate, and I could swear it looked like it had some actual web sewed into it. All in all, the outlook was quite cool, it’s just that it was confusing to look at…him? I mean, the person did look like a man, alright—a fine one, on top of that—and they did call themselves a man, so.
“Are you going to—morph into a spider or some shit?” I found myself asking, sounding less mortified than I felt on the inside. That was good, no? I mean…this creature still hadn’t attacked me or killed me, so we were getting somewhere, right?
“Morph into a spider—” And then the creature—man—was laughing hard and loudly, doubling over as its body shook, hitting its knees with its hands, making me narrow my eyes at them. Nothing about what I had asked was funny. I was genuinely confused. Was this some kind of prank? Would I end up going viral all over the internet? Where were the cameras?
“I’m not Antman.”
“Antman doesn’t turn into an ant.” I deadpanned, the stranger in front of me raising up to their full height again, quieting down. I swear to God, I could just about slightly see their lips pursed, but the mask did a good job at concealing every feature of the stranger’s.
“Yeah, you’re actually right.” The stranger seemed to agree with me, and if I had to take a guess, he was probably smiling underneath his mask, “So, if Antman doesn’t turn into an actual ant, do you think Spiderman will turn into an actual spider?”
“Where are we? At school?” I deadpanned sarcastically, eyebrows furrowing as I just realized the web this creature had shot towards me to stop me from falling into the puddle was still clinging to my forearm. Ew.
“Right, I’m—oh.” The stranger cut themselves off as something on their left arm started buzzing, quiet beeping catching my attention as I looked towards his wrist, at which the weirdo was blinking down at now—well, their mask was, “Sorry, duty calls, them bad boys are asking for it again. Are you far from home?”
“No, I live right down the street.” I found myself answering whatsoever, the fear of getting murdered miraculously gone despite this weird encounter.
“Cool, then hurry home before it gets later and more dangerous.” The stranger’s voice was friendly, and I watched as they bent their knees a few times, looking like they were about to launch themselves away.
“Wait—” I quickly said, biting my lower lip when the masked man turned his head towards me, “where’s the guy that was threatening me?”
The stranger just shrugged his shoulders once, and I could hear the smile in his voice, “Don’t worry about him, he won’t bother you again anytime soon.”
“Oh, okay.” I whispered, eyes widened once the stranger shot another web from their wrist, this one quite long as it latched onto the side of an abandoned factory. Wow, just how was that possible? Wouldn’t it break? No, wait, it was able to hold me without breaking, so it certainly wouldn’t break under this man’s weight—isn’t that impressive?!
“Hey,” Snapped out of my thoughts, I was surprised to find the man crouched down, funnily resembling a frog, “I’m glad I found you at the right time, but try to be more careful next time, I’m afraid I won’t be always around to save you.”
I gulped and nodded, feeling my cheeks tinge red a little, “Thanks…Spiderman?”
The person chuckled, soft and a little deep, somehow the voice modulator unable to properly mask the sound, and then—as quickly as he had appeared in front of my eyes out of thin air—he was gone just like that too. I whipped my head up with my mouth falling open, watching in awe as the man swung around from building to building, making it seem like nothing. He had some mad trust in those webs of his, I could never. My fear of heights simply would make me too terrified to frail around like that, so high up in the sky. One misstep and—well, you’re dead.
The loud barks of a dog coming from a house down the street made me jump, and I realized I should’ve long made my way home. Couldn’t have my mother worrying about me so soon, and so, heeding the advice of this…Spiderman, I hurried the rest of the way back home, reminding myself to look up this mystery—hero?
            Well, school turned out to be the complete opposite of my expectations. The ambush I was waiting for as I walked through the large front doors—well, it never happened. People swarming towards me, desperate to meet and greet the new girl—that, also didn’t happen. Perhaps I misjudged the situation at first, after all, not all people were so eager to make new friends, but to not have at least one single person approach me was—simply put, odd. Well, it was odd until I found out the reason as to why everyone seemed to steer clear from my path, avert their eyes—or even going to the length of staring at the ground while they walked past me—or why I heard whispers behind my back everywhere I went. They’ve heard what my ‘step-father’ had done. By now, everyone knew why my mother and I had to move to a new city, yet nobody bothered enough to hear the full story—or at least wait before judging me. He wasn’t even my step-father, actually, my mother never got to marry him with how he’s now locked up in federal prison, rotting away in a cell.
“Did you hear her father stabbed the man one hundred times?”
“Do you think she’s also a psychopath?”
“She does look like one, if you ask me.”
“Who even allowed her to enrol in our school?!”
“Wait, what if she carries a knife on her like her father did?!”
“Do you think her father brought her out with himself to hunt for his prey together?”
Were some of the absurd whispers I managed to catch during the four hours that I’ve been at my new school, and these questions just kept getting more hilarious and deranged each time I heard them.
“Yes, and he made sure to teach me how to smell a weakling, too.” I had smirked, just barely turning my head, to look at the blonde girl in line behind me as we were waiting for our turn to pick up our food, “Usually blondies like you are easy to lure in, sweetheart. Less yapping and paying more attention to your surroundings might save you next time from saying something embarrassing about said person standing right next to you.”
The blonde’s eyes had almost bulged out of her eye sockets just as it was our turn to pick up our food for the day, and then I was off to find a table that was still empty as I knew no one would want to sit next to me. Thankfully, the canteen of the high-school was spacious enough.
And after that, not much happened other than people unabashedly staring my way and whispering, the teachers being either very nice or acting uncaring towards me. And by the middle of the day, I was finally ready to head home, but I had yet to power through two more classes. And if that didn’t sound excruciating enough, the loud laughter suddenly dying down as a group of girls passed by me, certainly brought a sour taste into my mouth. I couldn’t help myself as I played into the rumours and hissed at the girls, making them scramble off in a frenzy. I chuckled, and quite quickly almost choked on my own spit as someone had started to chuckle behind me, scaring the living daylights out of me. I had—foolishly—assumed I was alone in the hallway, wanting to pick up a few books from my locker before I would head to my next class. I had zero intentions to pay attention in my last two classes, reading some manga will do for the time being.
“You’re not helping yourself by feeding into these people’s delusions.” The same voice that had chuckled spoke up as I whirled around, totally not expecting to see the loomingly tall guy from my classes, leaned against the lockers, a dashing smile on his face. Fuck. Did he have to be so handsome?
“Speaking to the ‘daughter’ of a criminal? How daring,” I whispered, faking a deranged smile as I grabbed something out of my pocket, “Aren’t you afraid you might be my next victim? Considering the fact that these stupid kids at school seem to think I’ve killed—fifteen people already?!”
And to that morbid ‘joke’, I certainly didn’t expect my cute—and handsome—classmate to burst out laughing. His puffy cheeks had a natural rosiness to them and I couldn’t fight the smile on my lips as I noticed the tips of his ears had turned slightly red as well. He laughed with his whole mouth, hand shielding it and oh—his fingers were nice. Long. Well—my classmate looked down at my hand, still laughing, as I held a plastic fork oh so menacingly and threateningly, pointed towards his chest.
“Why do you have a plastic fork in your jacket?” My classmate asked amused, narrowing his eyes teasingly, “Were you waiting all day long just to do that?”
“No!” I exclaimed mortified, hiding the plastic fork behind my back. God, this is now really embarrassing, “I just—I was wearing this jacket when my mom and I were moving in. I bought some food and this fork, apparently, and then completely forgot about it and left it in my pocket.”
I could swear I heard my classmate mutter a ‘cute’ before he straightened up, dusting his seemingly completely spotless jeans. Oh, God, okay, he’s tall tall. I gulped as I slightly had to look up at him, feeling so completely little despite having a quite decent height for a girl—not that there’s anything wrong with any type of heights.
“I meant to greet you during our lunch break, but my friends wouldn’t let me leave,” My classmate spoke up while scratching the back of his head, looking sheepish. I had to force my eyes to move up to his face from his hands, only to have my stomach doing weird flips. Oh, hell no, I was not about to have a crush on someone—let alone my classmate—the very first day I get to my new high-school. But the guy wore washed out blue jeans, looking a little baggy, and he had a white, probably, t-shirt peeking out from underneath his green long-sleeved blouse, a jersey with our school’s logo thrown over it. And the blue and white bandana around his greyish-greenish—and blueish in certain lightning—hair certainly pulled his outfit together, making him look really good. And despite considering myself someone who is almost always well dressed, I felt quite plain looking right now. Absentmindedly, I started playing with one of my many rings that I was wearing, “My name is Jeong Yunho, by the way.”
Right, Jeong Yunho. I’ve caught his name from the teachers and a few classmates already. I smiled, nodding a little, “Yeah, I’ve heard your name a few times this morning. I’m Kang Y/N.”
“It’s nice to officially meet you, then, Y/N.” I chuckled and shook his extended hand, totally trying not to gape at how big it was and how awfully well it enveloped around mine. Plus, his hand was way too hot, almost to the point it was burning my freezing hand.
“You too.” I found myself answering, but not quite present as I tried to pull my hand out of Yunho’s before I would start gushing about his fingers. God, when have I turned into this person? Yeah, I had a thing for hands, fingers, and rings, sue me—but never have I had it this badly for someone I just met.
“So,” Yunho said cheerily, clapping his hands together as I pushed mine inside my jacket’s pockets, “Do you want me to show you around school? I know a few good hiding spots for when you’re in the mood to skip classes.”
“Aren’t we supposed to be in class right now, though?” I asked confused, looking down the empty hallway. The bell had rung a good ten minutes ago, but I had figured the teacher’s would be lenient with me today as I was new and—didn’t actually know my way around school just yet.
“Nah,” Yunho chuckled, his features really boyish and—cute—damn it, “I spoke to the teacher, it was his idea to ask me to show you around, actually. You’ll find Mr. Kim a rather odd man, but he’s cool and really smart.”
“Oh, okay,” I muttered, pursing my lips as I opened my locker to put away my books as I didn’t need them anymore, “but for the record, that guy everyone is talking about, isn’t my father. We’re not related, not even a little bit. He’s a psycho and I’m glad he’s locked up for life.”
I didn’t mean to sound so—rough, but I hated the fact that everybody so quickly assumed things about me that weren’t even true. Yeah, I didn’t exactly want to be bothered and make new friends, but one or two people would’ve been still nice if they did approach me.
“Yeah, I don’t exactly care,” Yunho said with a casual shrug, giving me a small smile that made his cheeks puff out a little bit, “call it a spidey sense, but I think you’re a really nice person.”
My eyes narrowed as I huffed quietly, crossing my arms in front of my chest as Yunho grinned, looking ready to finally show me around, “Speaking of spiders, who the fuck is this Spiderman?”
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            If there was one thing in the world that I would find no matter where I was—that was a skatepark. No matter how much I love watching anime and reading mangas, skateboarding just so happens to be a little higher up on the scarce list of my likes and dislikes. And after having cruised around my neighbourhood, narrowly avoiding the masses as I refused to step down off my skateboard, I finally found a skatepark. It wasn’t too packed, which was really awesome—I never actually liked it when it was full of rowdy kids wanting to show off—and it was in walking—or riding—distance from the neighbourhood I live in. At least the people around here look a little bit friendlier than the ones back on my street, my mother would finally have something to be happy about. She hates our new place—understandably so—and is restlessly looking for a new job, to the point that I had to shut her laptop off last night for her and send her to bed. Who is being the responsible adult now, huh, mom?
Today was my third day at school and—well, it could have been worse, to be fair. My peers still looked at me like I had two heads—or was carrying a knife on me—they still whispered made up shit about me—of course, they did, it was barely my third day—but somehow having Yunho around slightly helped? Yeah, Yunho—well, he is quite adamant on being my friend despite me very obviously ruining his perfect reputation. It wasn’t hard to notice just how popular this dude actually is at school. Everyone greets him in the hallways, people flock to him every few minutes, and he’s always smiling and making small talk with everyone. He does have his closer-knit friend group—who very obviously are not fond of me—yet he still somehow makes it seem like he’s friends with absolutely everyone. I wounder if he’s ever had an enemy in his life before—less likely, to be fair. With a face and personality like his, I don’t think anyone would have the guts to hate that guy.
But putting thoughts of Yunho aside and sending a quick text to my mother to inform her about my whereabouts, I placed my phone back in the back pocket of my jeans, and took off towards the slope. My skateboard glided smoothly along the ground as I passed by a few other skaters, the sky darkening soon as evening was slowly approaching. A group of guys were huddled together and watching something on their phones as I did a 360, grinning as they cast glances my way after the little trick I pulled. I wasn’t a big trick master, never too bothered to actually learn the ones that were more dangerous, however the few tricks I did know were pretty cool and nicely executed. Arriving to the slope, I stepped my left foot off the skateboard and looked down, watching a few skaters glide down and do tricks. The slope wasn’t too high nor too big, I had no problem going down it. So, stepping back onto my skateboard, I kicked off and grinned as my heart started pumping faster, the familiar rush of adrenaline coursing through my bloodstream. I had tied my hair in a low ponytail, not keen of having it whipped in my face by the wind.
I grinned as my path was clear, making it possible for me to do a kickflip, my skateboard lifting and turning as I raised my knees high up, letting out a quiet huff as the moment was soon over and my feet were planted on my skateboard again, the speed and force enough to help me glide up on the other end of the slope. A guy and girl were at the top, both clapping casually as I grinned, doing a 180 turn before stepping off my skateboard.
“Nice one.” The girl praised and I bowed my head slightly, grinning.
“Thanks, you’re pretty cool yourself too.” I complimented her, having seen her do an ‘alley-oop backside 50-50 grind’. The girl grinned and did a mock salute before she was off the slope, in no time doing a 540 backside, making the guys—and myself—cheer for her. She had some nice skills; I had to give it to her. The girl grinned as she came to a stop at the top of the other end of the slope, shooting thumbs up towards us. I chuckled and walked to the side, taking a seat as my legs dangled off the slope. I had been riding around for more than half an hour, I could use a break right now. Besides, taking in my ‘competitors’ was always a smart move. And I mean, maybe I could make some friends too here? That girl seems pretty cool and the tricks she knows are awesome. I watched her do an ‘airwalk’, then ‘ollied’ off the side of the slope as she was headed towards a ledge grind, where she went for a ‘backside nose slip’. I placed my hands underneath my thighs as another guy went barrelling down the other end of the slope, doing a 50-50 grind as he came up on the side I was sitting at, before heading for a smaller ramp, nailing a ‘frontside boneless’. I pursed my lips and nodded, appreciating his technique as the bigger crowd of boys now kicked off too, weaving through the smaller ramps, doing tricks as one of them was headed for the slope. He grinned as he kicked off his skateboard, picking up speed as he went from one side to the other, winking at me as he did a 50-50 grind, making me snort. But he wasn’t done trying to impress the people who were watching him, and he daringly went ahead and did a ‘Casper Flip’, my eyes widening at how smoothly he nailed it. That was a trick I have tried to learn one too many times, but in the end my legs just got jumbled together—and not having enough patience—I just gave up on it.
The guy did another kickflip and then he was off towards his friends, who were loudly cheering him on, patting his back. I chuckled and looked around, noticing it was golden hour. It was beautiful, the sun coated everything in orange, reflecting off the windows of the tall buildings surrounding the park. I smiled and grabbed my phone, snapping a few pictures off it before I realized it was getting really late now and I still had to finish my Geography homework. So, just as I stood up, suddenly loud cheers erupted all around me, making me look around curiously. But there wasn’t anyone performing any cool or hard tricks, so I looked on confused, up until I saw someone pointing upwards. And as I looked up too, squinting as the golden hue of the sunlight was harsh to the bare eyes, I noticed something swinging from building to building. Red and blue and webs. Ah, Spiderman. I chuckled as I glanced at the kids in the park again, noticing the awe and excitement as they waved and pointed at the—hero?
“Spiderman!” A younger looking girl cried out, waving so hard her arm threatened to fall off any minute now, her phone in her hand, no doubt recording Spiderman. But the guy was too high-up to hear anyone call out for him. I grabbed my skateboard and placed my phone back in my pocket before I was off the slope, doing a few ollies and kickflips in the process, skirting around the mini-ramps, opting to just casually stroll out of the park. I pushed my hands in my pockets and allowed the skateboard to roll at an acceptable speed, smiling at the cool girl when she waved at me, noticing that I was on my way out. However, as my attention was on her, I failed to notice a guy rolling towards me rather quickly, in the midst of doing an airwalk, completely oblivious to me as he grinned at the camera his friend had pointed towards him. And when I finally turned my head to look ahead, it was too late as the guy and my skateboards crashed together, making me cry out in surprise. In no time was I tumbling towards the cold ground, bracing myself for the impact, thinking I would end up with scrapped elbows—if nothing anything worse.
But the impact never came and I stood frozen, hearing whispers around me and the other guy’s moans of pain. My eyebrows furrowed as I slowly opened one eye, mouth falling completely open as Yunho stood leaning over me, one strong arm holding me up around my middle, my body inches away from the ground. His eyes searched my face for a second before a huge smile stretched onto his lips, chuckling at my befuddlement as my heart continued to race. Since when was Yunho at the skatepark? And how did I fail to notice him? And why was I blushing so hard as he helped me stand up straight?
“Oh—uh—hi.” I muttered, feeling flustered as Yunho didn’t release me despite me being back on my two feet, “Thanks, that’s—impressive. Uh—since when were you at the park?”
Yunho chuckled and averted his eyes, his ears reddening suspiciously as he released me at last, “Just now—I mean, I was around. At the back, uh, I—I was passing by when I saw someone I knew in here and—are you okay?”
“It’s not me you have to be worried about.” I said with a grimace, pointing at the other guy that was now sitting on the ground, clutching his elbow to his chest.
“Hey, are you okay?” Yunho sounded worried as he walked over, crouching down.
“Yeah, I don’t think it’s broken.” The guy said and Yunho pursed his lips, looking alright with his answer, however, he still went and helped him off the ground, muttering something to the guy as he nodded and grabbed his skateboard before going off.
“What’d you say to him?” I asked curiously, looking up at Yunho with my eyebrows raised. He cleared his throat and ran his long fingers through his hair, the redness from his ears spreading to his neck now.
“That he should go to the doctor, it might not be broken but you know…a smaller rupture or something might still have happened.” Yunho explained and I hummed, looking around as I didn’t know what to say or do. The kids were slowly going home, the skatepark emptying, streetlamps illuminating the streets as the sun was gone now. It was time for me to head home.
“I have to—”
“Would you like to—”
Yunho and I looked at each other with our eyes wide, both a little embarrassed for speaking over the other. I could feel my face heat up and I looked down at the ground, stepping on the heel of my skateboard in order to hold it up, to have something to distract myself with.
“Sorry, you go first.” Yunho said, voice quiet as a car honked loudly as it narrowly avoided another one that just stopped without putting the hazard lights on.
“Oh,” I licked my lips before looking up at Yunho, for a second captured by his chocolate brown eyes. His silver-greenish-bluish hair was out of his eyes today, swept back a little messily with a middle part at his forehead, strands wavier than yesterday or the day before. It softened his features in a sweet way, “No, uhm, were you going to ask me something?”
“Yeah, I—” Yunho took his bottom lip between his teeth, hesitating for a second, “Would you like to grab something from the convenience store? Soda or anything else…”
I pursed my lips, calculating in my head whether I had enough money on me to go spend it at the convenience store, however, Yunho mistook my silence as a refusal, his cheeks instantly inflaming hot pink, “You don’t have to! I’m sorry, that was too much, I—I know we just met a few days ago, but—”
“I’d like to go, Yunho.” I cut his panicked ramble off, smiling at him amused. Yunho gaped for a second longer at me, but then he shut his mouth and chuckled, rubbing the back of his head. Why did he have to look so cute whenever he did that?
“Oh, cool, there’s a store right across the street.” Yunho pointed behind me, making me look back. Huh, I haven’t even noticed the convenience store before, but perhaps that’s because the windows were dusted up and there were no signs indicating that it was still in function, “Oh, it looks dodgy from the outside but they even have arcade games inside! I really like that place.”
“Sure, let’s go then.” I shrugged and offered Yunho a wide smile, taking off towards the exit of the park, “But I can’t stay for long, my mother will be worried about me no matter how many texts I send that I’m fine.”
Yunho’s chuckle mirrored mine behind me, and I pushed the gate open, stepping aside and holding the door open for Yunho. He thanked me and walked ahead, waiting for me at the crossroad. It took me a second to notice his cardigan, which was blue and super fluffy, and its hood had ears. It looked cute—why was everything cute about this guy? I quickly averted my eyes off Yunho when he turned to check that I was still keeping up with him—walking behind him, since his legs are too long and I can’t keep up with him—slowing down a little when he noticed I was struggling to hold my skateboard and also keep up his pace.
“Do you want me to carry that for you?” He asked with a smile, pointing at the skateboard.
“Ah, no, I got this.” I grinned, giving him a thumps-up, making Yunho chuckle as he quickly turned his head, muttering something to himself. As we arrived in front of the store, Yunho pushed the door open for me this time and stepped aside, ushering me inside. The place was actually well lit and there was a nice vanilla scent wafting through the air. I smiled as the clerk greeted us, beckoning us further inside. The walls were a neon yellow and fridge after fridge lined up against it, a few tables stern across in the middle of the space. It wasn’t a huge store, just enough for about ten people to fit inside. But the arcade Yunho talked about was nowhere to be seen.
“So, where’s that arcade at, huh?” I teased as I followed Yunho to a fridge, his grin so wide it stretched across his whole face. He sneaked a glance my way before turning towards a door I assumed were the toilets, and pointed one long finger at it.
“Beyond that door.” He answered and the opened the fridge, grabbing one strawberry milk for himself. I hummed and pursed my lips as I looked through the window of the fridges, trying to decide what I was craving. And chocolate milk was the winner as I grinned while grabbing it out of the fridge. The music wasn’t too loud inside the store, just the right volume if you wanted to have a conversation without bothering others or getting overheard. Yunho stood by the front desk, apparently conversing with the clerk, the two huddled close together. I narrowed my eyes at the two as I approached, propping my skateboard up against the sturdy wood of the front desk. The clerk cleared his throat upon noticing me and pulled back, plastering a generic smile on his face. His sharp eyes weren’t the friendliest, but he didn’t seem malicious.
“What’d you get?” Yunho asked as he looked down at me, still leaning against the front desk, arms crossed and resting on the wooden table. I placed my chocolate milk next to his strawberry one and smiled.
“Chocolate milk, haven’t had it in a really long time.” Well—does one consider three days ago a long time ago? Because I do, certainly. Yunho hummed and then faced the clerk again, nudging his head in the direction of our items.
“Think you can put them on my tab, Joong?” Yunho’s grin held mischief as he snickered in the clerk’s direction, who’s eyes narrowed.
“This isn’t a bar, Yunho, no, I can’t put it on your tab.” The clerk’s voice held exasperation as he heaved a long sigh, “You still haven’t paid for your last purchase—”
“Hey! I thought we had an agreement about that one!” Yunho exclaimed, looking offended as the clerk just rolled his eyes and crossed his arms in front of his chest.
“Fine, but next time you are paying for every item you have bought from me and haven’t paid for yet this month.” Yunho giggled—actually giggled and something in my stomach coiled at the warm and cute sound of it—as he grabbed our strawberry and chocolate milks, winking at the clerk.
“I won’t be coming around too soon, then, Joong.” The clerk just rolled his eyes again and grabbed for his phone from his hoodie’s pocket.
“We’ll see about that spider—I mean—spidey obsessed dude.” I laughed a little at the clerk’s words, however it quickly died down when I saw the way Yunho froze and the clerk’s eyes widened just a fraction. Sensing the sudden weird tension in the air, I cleared my throat and grabbed my chocolate milk out of Yunho’s hand.
“Thank you for your generosity—” I raised my eyebrows, not feeling it adequate to call the clerk by the nickname Yunho did.
“Hongjoong,” It was Yunho who answered though, the clerk seemed a little uncomfortable all of a sudden, “He’s a good friend of mine, so don’t worry about it.”
“Good friend of mine,” Hongjoong, the clerk, mocked with a grimace, “We’ve known each other since they day you were born, you idiot.”
“Hey, so what?!” Yunho stuck his tongue out, and before I could thank Hongjoong properly for letting me have a free strawberry milk, Yunho was gripping my arm and pulling me towards the table furthest from the front desk. In a haste, I grabbed my skateboard and grinned at Hongjoong, bowing my head a little as he blinked before offering me the smallest smile I’ve ever seen. Well, what a colourful personality this shorter guy had.
Yunho was seemingly eager to reach our table as he had plopped down into a seat just as we got to it, excitedly opening his strawberry milk, making me chuckle. I placed my own chocolate milk on the table, not noticing how close it was to the edge as I placed my skateboard on the floor, and then shrugged my jacket off. It was warm enough inside to get rid of it, and so, as I went to put my jacket on the back of my chair, I accidentally knocked my hand into my chocolate milk, sending it towards the ground. However, as I gasped and went to reach for it, Yunho’s hand was already extended, small carton held securely in his big hand. I blinked, staring at Yunho for a second before I placed the jacket on the back of the chair and took a seat opposite him.
“Thanks.” I muttered as he extended the chocolate milk towards me, only just now noticing that the nail on his left ring finger was painted a dark blue. I tried to fight the blush that threatened to bloom on my cheeks as our fingers touched, eyes trained onto the table and subsequently on Yunho’s hands as they were both resting on top of it. He wore a few black rings and his whole outfit was casual wear once again, yet it looked really well put together. As I fiddled with the lid of my chocolate milk, I tried to ignore how hot Yunho’s hand felt again, and blamed it on the fact that my hands were always cold, “You’ve got some really nice reflexes, Yunho.”
My eyebrows raised as Yunho choked on his strawberry milk, coughing a little as he hit his chest a few times, struggling to regulate his breaths again. Well—I suppose I must have said something wrong, then? However, I failed to understand what exactly that I said was—well, wrong or triggering.
“Yeah, sorry,” Yunho cleared his throat at last, chugging half of his strawberry milk down, “thank you, I—uh, I’ve always been, uh, fast?”
“Is that a question?” I asked with a chuckle, pushing the little straw inside the little bottle before I took a small sip.
“No! I—” Yunho smacked his lips together, ears red once again, “I do have good reflexes, you’re right. Not many people notice.”
“I mean,” I chuckled, smiling at him, “that’s weird since it’s so obvious.”
“It is?” Yunho asked confused, scratching the back of his head.
“A little bit.” I whispered, averting my eyes as I became shy under Yunho’s watchful gaze. He was a tiny bit intimidating, but overall, really nice—and cute, damn it.
“So,” Yunho cleared his throat, keen on changing the subject, “How do you like it here?”
I shrugged, placing my hands on the table as I started playing with my rings, “I haven’t even been here for a week yet, but—it’s fine? I suppose—I mean, it could be a lot worse.”
“Don’t like where you live?” When my eyebrows furrowed, Yunho seemed to choke a little on his strawberry milk again, “I mean—the neighbourhood! Or like—your neighbours or—something.”
“Yeah,” I chuckled, finding it a little endearing how easily flustered Yunho got. In school we couldn’t talk for long as his friends would always interrupt us, boisterous and loud for no reason, “You are quite spot on with that, what gave you the hint?”
“Oh, I,” Yunho gestured around, shrugging a little, “figured since you were at the skatepark. It’s not that big nor very equipped. Others would want to go the central one, close to the big mall.”
“There’s one there too?” I quirked up in interest, “I have missed riding around, so I wasn’t in a search for a skatepark necessarily, you see, I came across this one randomly. And I’m glad I did, because I saw some really cool tricks the others were doing.”
“How long have you been skating for?” Yunho asked in interest, leaning forward, chin resting on his intertwined hands.
“Uhm,” I hummed, looking up towards the ceiling as I tried to count the years, “Ten, maybe? But I only ever skated for fun.”
“It’s a pretty cool skill and hobby to have.” Yunho grinned, eyes falling onto my skateboard as I placed my right leg on top of it, smiling at his compliment, “And I’ve also noticed that you like reading?”
“Oh,” I flushed a little, biting the straw of my chocolate milk before I took a gulp, “yeah, I really like reading—mangas.”
“Really?!” Yunho exclaimed, shouting over the smooth melody playing from the radio. I sneaked a glance towards Hongjoong, and quite frankly, wasn’t surprised to see him watching Yunho with narrowed eyes, it almost made me chuckle at how oblivious—or uncaring—Yunho was towards Hongjoong’s apparent annoyance with him.
“Really.” I chuckled, raising my eyebrows, “Why are you so excited, you also like mangas?”
“Oh, well, not me—not that I have anything against them! They are like super cool and such!” Yunho rambled on, averting his eyes as I tried to fight my amused grin off my face, “Mangas are cool, is what I’m trying to say, however, it’s my best friend that really likes them.”
“Hongjoong?” I asked interested, happy to have something to talk about with Hongjoong since I would be returning to this store as it was straight across the skatepark.
“Mingi, actually.” Yunho muttered, slumping back in his seat, “You know, our classmate.”
“Oh, Song Mingi?” Meaning, the guy that’s been staring daggers at me anytime Yunho even as much as came in my vicinity? I figured this Mingi guy wasn’t a huge a fan of me, not that I could do anything about it, really. If some people wanted to believe the rumours, I couldn’t do anything about that.
“Him, yeah,” Yunho muttered, pursing his lips, “I promise he’s not a douche even if he acts like it at times—”
“All the time.” I added with a chuckle, making Yunho look away.
“He’ll warm up to you.” He tried to cheer me up, but I just shrugged.
“And if he doesn’t, it’s fine, Yunho.” I reassured him with another smile, “It’s not like we can like everyone.”
“True, but—now that you two have something in common he will give in to you, trust me.” Yunho looked quite convinced and I just chuckled as I nodded once, taking some more sips of my chocolate milk.
“So, if Mingi and I like reading mangas, what do you like, Yunho?” I raised my eyebrows, definitely ignoring the way my heartrate picked up when an abashed smile stretched onto Yunho’s lips and he looked up through his lashes at me.
“Video games, like, a lot.” There was an excited glint in Yunho’s eyes as he ran his fingers through his hair, “I eat and breathe video games.”
I giggled and nodded as Yunho went on a short rant about his favourite video games and which were best to play if you were a beginner—like me—and which were more challenging and not too nerve-wrecking as he apparently had a problem of controlling his rage when playing video games. Which seemed so unnatural of Yunho, who was always calm and sweet, nice, and helpful to everyone. Not that I had known him for long, but the more time I spent with him, the quicker I realized that he truly is the way he portrays himself to be. I laughed as Yunho retold a story of him being so mad at losing a game that he scared his dog, which then jumped off the bed and got tangled in the wires, and almost completely destroyed Yunho’s TV. Well, I suppose Yunho learned not to rage in front of his dog after that day—if he wanted to keep his TV intact.
We had both long finished our respective drinks and as I had glanced down at my phone, I realized it was late—my mother would whoop my ass for staying out for so long. Hongjoong didn’t look too happy either as Yunho and I got ready to leave, and I threw an apologetic smile at him as Yunho stayed back for a few minutes. I stood in front of the store, waiting for Yunho, just enjoying the chilly air as the wind blew through the streets of the city.
“Okay, let’s go.” Yunho said once he joined me outside, smiling.
“Where do you live?” I asked, pushing my hands in the pockets of my jacket.
“Around.” Yunho’s answer was short and then he motioned down the sidewalk, “Let’s go, I’ll walk you home.”
“You don’t have to!” I squeaked, growing embarrassed all of a sudden, “I don’t want to bother you. It’s already late, your parents must be worried.”
“They certainly aren’t,” Yunho chuckled, leaning down to be eye level with me, “they are out on a date tonight and they aren’t coming back until late into the night. So, let’s go.”
“Oh,” I muttered, biting my bottom lip and before I could grab my skateboard, it was already in Yunho’s hands as he skipped down the sidewalk happily. I chuckled and followed after him, having to jog to actually catch up with his long strides, “You know, Yunho, not everyone was blessed with long legs like yours.”
Yunho’s ears turned red again as he instantly slowed down, scratching his nape, “Right, sorry. Sometimes I forget I’m tall and like—super quick too.”
“You’re like the Flash or something.” I teased with a chuckle, however, Yunho’s eyebrows furrowed and he was suddenly pouting.
“The Flash?” He asked, sounding almost offended, “He’s not even that cool, Y/N.”
“Is he not?” I deadpanned, raising my eyebrows at Yunho.
“He really isn’t.” Yunho huffed, cheeks puffing out even more, making him look adorable despite him sulking.
“Well then, who do you think is cool, Yunho?” I asked, genuinely interested about his opinion.
“Spiderman, of course!” He exclaimed as if that were obvious, making me scoff.
“You don’t even know who the guy is.” I muttered, as we stopped at a red light.
“Do you know who the Flash is?” Yunho’s eyes narrowed as he stared down at me, and I huffed.
“Well, no, but—I don’t know, I’m new to the city. I don’t know anything about Spiderman, of course I’m biased towards someone else.” I ended up explaining my reasoning and Yunho just hummed as the red light turned green and we crossed the road.
“Well, let me help you out, then.” Yunho grinned and suddenly grabbed my jacket, steering me away from a lamppost. I chuckled in embarrassment and thanked him quietly before he could continue talking, “So, Spiderman is like—super cool, you know? He helps the city whenever something really bad happens. He like—you know—he makes order. Puts bad people in jail and saves innocent civilians. Also! He doesn’t just save people, he helps old people cross the road, rescues poor animals living on the streets, even feeds pigeons! And I’ve seen him once cleaning the windows of a really high building since everybody else refused to go up that high. And he takes pictures with children, you know? Shows up at the city’s fair and has never once turned down an invitation from the mayor to represent the good force of the city alongside with the cops, of course.”
As Yunho took a deep breath, having rushed all that out in one breath, I couldn’t help but burst out laughing, having to press a hand against my mouth to muffle the sounds. I’ve never seen Yunho as passionate about something—except for video games—before, and as hilarious he looked with his eyebrows furrowed and lips pouting every few seconds—fuck, he was just as cute—so cute in fact, that I nearly tripped over nothing, but he was too lost in his excitement to notice, thankfully. Having slightly calmed down my heart, I glanced at Yunho, amused to see him clutching my skateboard against his chest, giving me a small glare.
“I’m sorry,” I said with a chuckle, clearing my throat, “You just sound an awful lot like you have a crush on Spiderman.”
Yunho scoffed, but he couldn’t fight the smile off his lips anymore, “Everyone has a crush on Spiderman, don’t you too?”
“I don’t know him well enough to have a crush on him just yet.” Yunho’s eyes narrowed for a split second.
“Yet, you say?”
“Yet, I say.”
And then I watched as Yunho turned the corner, skipping a few steps ahead as he led the way down my street, headed towards my house. I don’t think I remember having told him about where I live?
            Yunho’s generosity seemed to be endless—and perhaps I was already starting to get used to, which, wasn’t exactly smart on my part. Yes, he was tall, handsome, boyish, and super cute with a personality of gold, but—was I sure my mother and I would actually settle down here? Was it really smart to start crushing on my classmate? Who I’m sure everyone in this damned high-school has a crush on, because he’s really just that nice and that sweet. Teachers love him, his peers admire him and want to be around him all the time, his friends are protective of him and—don’t like me, that’s now one hundred percent sure. Why? Well, because, I was just as baffled as they were this morning when upon entering the classroom, Yunho was out of his seat, completely abandoning the conversation he was having with San in order to approach me. I—of course, like a deer caught in headlights—froze in my spot, thus blocking the entrance to the classroom—making a guy almost run into me as he was on his phone, not paying attention to what was happening in front of him. But Yunho didn’t seem to mind my momentary shock as he grinned from ear to ear, his hair very fluffy as it was even wavier than yesterday, his outfit making me gulp before I managed to compose myself and force a smile onto my lips. He wore grey tech pants with a white shirt—top two butting undone—and a grey cardigan over it and—oh, he wore a fucking silver necklace at the base of his throat, that paired with his black rings for sure made me forget what planet Earth is for a second—or two—who knows, my brain wasn’t processing well at the moment.
And to render me even more speechless, Yunho draped an arm around my shoulders and completely nonchalantly veered me towards his friends. Choi San and Song Mingi. I saw the look on their faces—a mixture of surprise and well, disgust—but San was quick to mask it with a cordial smile, while Mingi—well, he didn’t, not that I expected him to do so. And then before either could say something, Yunho announced that he’d be sitting with me in our English literature class, making me stare at him in surprise—mirroring San and Mingi’s baffled expressions. Why did I have a feeling that right now I was their number one enemy? And then, to try and appease them, I bowed and muttered a quiet ‘sorry’, before Yunho was already walking us to my usual seat, making me lick my lips as I tried to ignore the sudden nerves engulfing my whole body. And what was worse, was the fact that I could feel Mingi’s glare boring into the back of my mind during the whole class, making me scared to look back when the teacher announced that we’d have to do a project with our seatmate. Which—to my delight, but poor overreactive heart—made Yunho so excited he almost knocked over my water bottle as he started animatedly explaining which book we should choose and why. Before the bell could even ring, Mingi was out the door with a loud scoff, and San was rolling his eyes as he slowly approached us, muttering something about Mingi overreacting—again.
Currently, however, we were in the canteen, trays in our hands full of food as Mingi lead the way, his form just as tall as Yunho’s, but shoulders a little broader than Yunho’s. Not that I have paid extra close attention to Yunho’s form or anything—you know. San and Yunho were having a heated debate whether the Yorkshire Terrier or Bull Terrier was cutest, making San whine about not wanting a puppy anymore because of Yunho—which was actually hilarious to hear as I saw zero to no similarities between the two breeds, except the fact that both were named Terriers.
“Just get a cat, oh, my God, San.” Mingi snapped loudly as he slammed his tray down against a table—smaller in size than the others and more at the back of the canteen—looking up with a small glare at San, “Can you two not argue for one second?”
“What’s got your panties in a twist today, Ming?” San chuckled, raising an eyebrow as I felt a little awkward while Yunho took a seat across from Mingi. San went to sit next to Yunho, and for a second, I considered excusing myself and just sitting by myself rather than having to sit next to Mingi knowing he’d rather die—or something—than sit next to me. But, to my rescue, Yunho cleared his throat and looked at San expectantly, who quickly got the memo and chuckled, “Right.”
Then he moved to sit next to Mingi and I gulped as I took my seat next to Yunho, feeling like I was intruding—which I probably was and as if Mingi had the same train of thought, he directed a quick glare at me.
“Didn’t know we’d have to mingle with others today, is all.” He answered San’s previous question and I gulped as I looked down, placing my hands in my lap.
“Okay, Mingi.” Yunho snapped, his tone harsh—and it was surprising, I’ve never heard him speak like that before, “We’re allowed to make new friends, are we not?”
Mingi scoffed and then stuffed his mouth with a spoonful of rice, “Yeah, with people who aren’t criminals.”
“Mingi, that’s enough.” It was San talking now, face hardened and eyebrows furrowed before he looked at me, expression softening, “We don’t even know her.”
“I’m sorry, I’ll just go.” I said with a sigh, about to grab my tray when suddenly Yunho’s hand grabbed mine, eyebrows furrowed as he looked down at me.
“You’re not going anywhere,” He said, sounding quite authoritative and determined to keep me there, “Let’s play a game where we ignore Mingi, how’s that sound?”
“I don’t—”
“Oh, I really like the sound of that.” San said with a mischievous chuckle as he nudged Mingi in the side, making him roll his eyes before he wordlessly dug into his meal, going completely silent, “And at the same time I don’t like the sound of silence, so—how do you like it here, Y/N?”
I struggled to not choke on the spoonful of soup I had just taken into my mouth, a little surprised that one of Yunho’s best friends’ was addressing me directly, “Oh, I, uhm—it’s fine. I mean…the kids are nice here. Sort of.” The last part I only added in a quiet mutter, but Mingi heard it and chuckled, giving me a smirk that felt a little bit malicious. However, his expression quickly changed as he yelped, jumping in his seat before fixating his glare onto Yunho, eyes narrowing, but Yunho just continued eating like nothing happened.
“Yeah, we…weren’t the nicest, sorry about that.” San’s cheeks tinged pink as he lowered his head a little, “I was raised to know better than to judge someone so easily, so, I’d like to apologise.”
My eyes widened when San raised his head, eyes shining with sincerity and regret. I suddenly felt awkward—well, my day certainly was taking a turn for the—better? I couldn’t tell just yet. I chuckled, shaking my head as I tried to play off San’s apology, it wasn’t that big of a deal, really, “Don’t worry about it, I get it. But for the record—I have zero DNA that ties me to that evil fucker, in fact, I played the biggest part in his case as I had been victim to his—abuse.”
A tense silence fell upon the table and suddenly I gulped, feeling terrible for trauma dumping so much on these three guys. Well, if they thought they could end up liking me up until a few seconds ago, the certainly wouldn’t think so anymore. What a way to ruin something going well for myself for once. I cleared my throat, and averted my eyes when Mingi raised his head, his eyebrows were furrowed, eyes taking me in intensely. Yunho’s body emitted a lot of warmth next to me all of a sudden, and he sighed loudly, shooting a very displeased look towards his two friends, “I’m sorry, we didn’t mean to force you to share anything you didn’t want—”
“I wanted you to know, though.” I found myself saying, biting my bottom lip nervously, “I don’t exactly care what the rumours say about me, but I feel angry when I hear people associate me with that monster. He’s a terrible man and he deserves to be locked up somewhere far away from society. He’s not my father and he would’ve never been, even if my mother did end up marrying him.”
“You’re really mature for someone our age.” San commented, lips stretched into a warm and friendly smile, “Not that we aren’t mature! Actually! I am the most mature one in our friend group, you know—”
“Like hell you are.” Mingi muttered before he averted his eyes, going back to eating his lunch.
“I am always the responsible one, looking out for these two idiots—” But San ignored Mingi and then pointed at the two tall best friends, “These two are always wreaking havoc, especially Yunho! He’s all sweet and so kind, but he’s really just hiding his mischievous side. One time, in eight grade, he broke our homeroom teacher car’s windshield and—”
“Okay, enough oversharing, San!” Yunho exclaimed alarmed, crossing his arms in front of his chest in an ‘X’ manner, making me laugh as I looked at him then back at San, who had his lips pursed and eyes narrowed.
“Remember Mingi, when he stole that manga for you from the corner bookstore?” San smirked, nudging Mingi lightly, who had a frighteningly similar smirk to San’s crossing his features as he looked up.
“Oh, I do. And remember when he absolutely destroyed Mrs. Kwan’s garden while riding his bike?”
“Enough, okay?!” Yunho exclaimed, his neck, ears, and cheeks flushed a deep red, eyebrows furrowed. I pressed a palm against my mouth, trying to muffle my bubbling laughter, but when San and Mingi simultaneously wiggled their eyebrows at Yunho, I couldn’t hold it back anymore. I burst out laughing, slowly San—and surprisingly—Mingi joined us too while Yunho sulked, leaning back in his chair, arms crossed in front of his chest.
“It’s not funny!” He exclaimed, grabbing a chicken wing with his hand and biting into it, staring off to the side.
“Oh, this guy was an absolute rascal when we were younger.” Mingi said, still laughing as he threw a pickle towards Yunho, who frowned at him and quickly ate it. I chuckled, amused by the three. Okay, if they weren’t glaring and sending me displeased looks, San and Mingi could be really cool guys.
“Now I see why you’re so obsessed with Spiderman.” I said with a chuckle, grinning at Yunho as I turned my head to look at him. His cheeks were still red and his lips jutting out, he looked so adorable it was hard to hold myself back from squishing his cheeks. San’s laughter, however, very slowly died down and Mingi—surprisingly—choked on the bite he just took of his meal, having to grab his water bottle and drink in order soothe his coughs, “He’s everything you weren’t. Having him as a role model might turn you into a better man.”
“Hey!” Yunho scoffed, playfully pushing my shoulder, sending a very non-threatening glare at me, “Spiderman is just simply cool, okay? I don’t have a crush on him or anything, I just—are you saying I’m not a good person?”
“What?!” I asked alarmed, completely oblivious to the amused glances San and Mingi were exchanging between each other as Yunho narrowed his eyes at me, “I never said that! You’re—cool.”
“Like Spiderman.” Yunho added with a wink and I scoffed, going back to eating my—now—cold soup.
“I see you are acquittanced with Spiderman, then.” San mused, finally eating his meal as well, it must’ve gone cold by now. I nodded as I finished eating my soup, sneaking glances at Yunho as his attention suddenly was on the TV mounted on the wall a few feet away. His eyebrows were furrowed and so, I looked to see what was bothering him, only to be met with a pretty bad looking bank robbery. A dozen of police cars were in front of the bank and—oh, no, an armed man held someone at gunpoint. The sound was muted, but I could guess that the armed man was holding an innocent by-passer. It brought a sour taste into my mouth as I averted my eyes, skin crawling a little at the memory of my mother’s ex doing something similar, yet so much worse. Mingi and San seemed to notice Yunho’s shift in mood and both turned to look at the TV, sighing when they saw what Yunho was looking at.
“I swear to God,” Mingi started muttering, turning his head away, “There’s always something fucked up happening every other day in this city…”
“I know,” San muttered, crestfallen, “I can’t count how many times my parents planned on moving away somewhere safer.”
I gulped, hoping my mother wouldn’t want to do the same. We’ve barely been here for five days, but—I started liking it here. There was something about this place that wasn’t as awful as I initially expected it to be. Did Yunho play a part in that to make me think so?
“Hey, I—I have to go to the washroom, don’t wait for me.” Yunho sounded nervous as he scrambled out of his seat, gulping as he paused for a second, “I’ll see you all in class.”
“Are you okay?” I found myself asking before Yunho could rush off.
“Yeah, don’t worry about me!” His smile seemed forced and my eyebrows furrowed as he hurried away, towards the exit of the canteen, sprinting out of sight. My eyes went back to the TV just in time to see everyone crouched down as the armed man, no doubt, fired some shots.
“Hey, you don’t have to look at that.” San offered, voice soft, “We can change seats, if you want.”
“Oh—no, thank you.” My cheeks turned red as I averted my eyes, offering San a small smile, “And uh—thanks for letting me sit with you guys, I know you don’t like me much.”
“Well, we’ve got all year to get to know each other, right, Mingi?” San threw a pointed look at his best friend and I was surprised to find him humming absentmindedly, pushing around his food.
“He always does this,” Mingi sighed, sounding worried, “disappears randomly whenever something bad is happening in the city.”
“Yunho?” I found myself asking in a whisper, but neither heard me.
“I told you so many times you’re reading too much into it, he just probably needs to take a dump or something—” San paused, cheeks flushing as he eyed me, but I acted like I didn’t hear what he had just said. Boys will be boys, I guess, “Anyways, break ends in fifteen, let’s finish up.”
So then, Yunho disappears often? Is that what Mingi was alluding to? But where to? And why only when something bad is happening in the city?
“Yeah, whatever.” Mingi muttered, pushing his tray of food away, knocking it into Yunho’s. He eyed his best friend’s tray and then sighed, leaning back in his chair as his eyes went back to the TV. And because I couldn’t help myself, I looked back too and—there he was, Spiderman. Saving the day, apparently. I guess he really is a hero.
“Hey, Y/N,” San spoke up again, mouth stuffed with food, cheeks puffed out, “I’ve seen you reading manga in class. Mingi likes it too, did you know?”
My eyes widened as I turned my head back towards the two boys sitting across me and chuckled, a little embarrassed, I wasn’t a good liar, “Oh, I, uh, nope. I didn’t know. Wow, that’s so…cool!”
Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed for a second, looking suspicious, “Yeah, cool.”
“Yup, cool.” I chuckled and then shut up because I didn’t want to further embarrass myself.
            And after we went to class, with Mingi sitting in the back with a rather gruff classmate of ours and San at the front with a guy I haven’t yet met, I got soon lost in my thoughts, eyes fixated on a vacant spot. Yunho’s usual spot. He hadn’t returned to class; half an hour had passed since he had gone to the washroom—that is if I actually believed he was at the washroom. It was less likely, but then again, why would he lie? And just as if my thoughts were synchronized with Yunho’s actions, the door was flung open and there he was, breathless, as he made his way inside.
“Sorry for being late!” He apologizes, plastering on a sheepish smile, “I—got caught up?”
The teacher narrowed her eyes for a second before muttering something and ushering Yunho towards his spot. I kept my eyes on him, taking him in as his clothes looked a little dishevelled and—was that a faint bruise on his cheek? But before I could dwell more about it, Yunho—probably having sensed my insistent stare—turned his head and smiled widely, his wavy hair falling in his chocolate brown eyes. My heart skipped a beat—stupid heart! And then, Yunho waved quickly and turned around before the teacher could chastise him for that too. God, why did he have to be so damn cute all the time?!
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            The first week in the big, new, city was slightly unnerving and overall, a very new feeling, however, despite that, I found myself enjoying it once I got accustomed to my surroundings. Of course, my mom won’t let me out after six o’clock in the afternoon due to the unsafety of the neighbourhood we live in, but the skatepark just two blocks down certainly is a nice stress reliever. School wasn’t too bad by the second week either, less people paid attention to me and whispered about me when I passed them in the hallways, and—besides the fact that Yunho seems to never want to stay away from me for too long—which is freaking cute and certainly so very bad as I have the fattest crush on him—by now, even San and Mingi have started warming up to me. Of course, Mingi still remains his unimpressed and emotionless self—unless Yunho is there with us—but I did manage to make him crack a smile here and there—mostly when we are talking about our favourite mangas and such. San, on the other hand, is a completely different story. After Yunho left me with him and Mingi in the canteen—you know, when he mysteriously disappeared for half an hour while there was a bank robbery going on—ever since then, San has been very happy each time the boys would hang out with me. And what was even more surprising, is that he sought out my company when he was on his own—mostly bored—and so very eager to tell me every and each cool story he manages to remember about Yunho, or himself, sometimes even Mingi. San is actually quite good at diffusing the tension created by Mingi, and he is even better at talking for hours on end without realising that Yunho—and I—have gotten tired of hearing his voice so often. But do not misunderstand, Yunho absolutely adores San, and I also happen to quite like him. He’s sweet, but fierce and unapologetically honest. Much like Mingi, which makes me think they are Yunho’s closest friends because he is too nice for his own good and would get taken advantage of if it weren’t for the two hounding him like some sort of guardians or something.  
As I clutched my phone in my left hand, rolling a pencil around in my right one, I froze for a second as I heard footsteps outside of my room, down the hallway. My door was closed as I was studying—well, actually, it’s just an excuse to be able to be on my phone without my mother seeing me every time she passes by my room. However, I halted my movements as shuffling came from right outside my door, and I panickedly tried to hide my phone underneath the two textbooks and three notebooks I had laying on my desk, pretending to be super confused about the equation I had to solve, as I started pouting just as my mother opened my door.
“Hey,” She called with a smile, making me put on my best clueless act, “how’s studying going?”
“Ugh, I hate maths.” I groaned and threw my pencil on the desk as I leaned back in my seat, “Can’t I just go to the skatepark? Please, mom.”
“Honey,” My mother chuckled, leaning against the doorway with an amused grin on her lips, “that skatepark isn’t going anywhere, however, if you fail your maths class…you might have to transfer to a new school—”
“No!” I didn’t mean to shout as I shoot up straight in my chair, blushing furiously as my mother raised her eyebrows at me. God dammit, this stupid crush I have on Yunho has me acting up—even though changing high-schools does sound awful. I’ve barely been at this one for two weeks, I can’t be changing schools so soon.
“Well, if you don’t want to fail, you know what to do.” My mother said with a chuckle as I tried to hide my blush. My eyes widened when my phone started buzzing underneath all the notebooks and textbooks. God, Yunho, texting back right now isn’t the smartest idea! But of course, he can’t know that my mother is standing in my doorway, under the impression that her daughter it studying her ass off, “Dinner’s ready in an hour.”
“Cool, I’ll join you once I’ve finished this exercise.” I shot my mom a quick smile, trying not to grimace as my phone buzzed again.
“Sure,” She snorted and pushed off the doorway, gripping the doorknob as she stepped out in the hallway, “giving me your phone would make you more productive, though.”
“What phone?” I forced on a grin that showed off all my teeth, making my mother shake her head at me as she left the room, closing my door behind her. I slumped in my chair and reached for my phone, clumsily pulling it out from underneath all of my things while creating a mess—nothing new—my room is always a mess, especially my desk. But as I went to check the messages Yunho had sent, there was a soft tapping against my window, and when I turned my head to look outside—I almost screamed.
I managed to just barely muffle it by pressing my hand against my gaping mouth as freaking Spiderman hung upside down outside my window, head tilted to the side. I took a second to digest the fact that the spider, but human like, creature was right there, waving at me and no doubt smiling as I saw the mask move underneath where his mouth is. I huffed and stood, patting my chest as my heart raced furiously against my ribcage, having been scared shitless by this Spiderman guy. I unlocked the window and pushed it upwards, opening it up for him. I watched as the web string he had hung on broke as he did a flip, landing on his two long feet. I froze a little as Spiderman leaned in, resting both elbows in the windowsill, placing his chin on his palm.
“Hi.” His voice was slightly altered again, and I cleared my throat, aware that I was wearing my worst possible clothes. I wasn’t expecting visitors—let alone Spiderman, “You look like you saw a ghost or something.”
“Well, yeah,” I scoffed, smoothing down my hair, “not a ghost, but a man that calls himself a spider. Ringing the front door next time would be less heart attack inducing, Mr. Spiderman.”
I didn’t expect the dude to laugh loudly, and my eyes widened as I reached forward, pressing my hand against his masked mouth to muffle the sounds he made—if my mother hears him, she’ll come to investigate, and I’m pretty sure she won’t be too happy to find a masked man in a full body costume outside my window, claiming to be some sort of hero of the city or something. My mother has never liked these superhero kind of things.
“Yeah, don’t call me Mr. Spiderman, please, it’s really cringey.” The spidey boy shivered and I chuckled, raising my eyebrows at him.
“Why? Aren’t you a man? Why would you call yourself Spiderman if you’re not a man?” The guy remained silent for a second before he started giggling, the voice modulator not doing a very good job at altering his voice. And for a second—but just for a second—I thought it sounded like Yunho’s giggles.
“I’m a man, well…almost a man.” Spiderman paused and I gave him a confused look, “I’m only eighteen, so not quite a man just yet.”
“You’re eighteen?!” I exclaimed, glancing back to make sure my mother wouldn’t come in like a bulldozer.
“Too old for you?” Spiderman asked with a chuckle, and I narrowed my eyes at him. I swear I can hear the smirk in his voice.
“You’re the same age as me, dipshit.” I scoffed, leaning away from the window.
“Well, that’s certainly a special way to express your gratitude to the man that’s saved you once.” I bit my bottom lip, averting my eyes from the guy that was standing outside my window.
“So, do you stalk every person you manage to save?” I instead asked, trying to dodge the fact that I should be apologising for the not so nice thing I called him.
“I’m not stalking you.” He chuckled, and then pushed himself away from the windowsill, “I’m just here to make sure you’re okay—and that you’re doing your maths homework—”
“Hey!” My eyes widened as I quickly glanced at my desk, “Were you eavesdropping too?”
“Maybe?” Spiderman sounded almost embarrassed as he scratched the back of his neck, and I narrowed my eyes at him as I scoffed.
“Well, spidey boy, as you can see, I am doing just fine.” I raised my arms and did a mocking twirl for him, then placed my hands on my hips as I gave him a deadpanned look, “Anything else that I can satisfy your creepy needs with?”
“I’m not creepy!” He exclaimed quickly, making me scoff, “Okay, fine, whatever. Coming to your window maybe wasn’t very smart, but I—uh, well, do you trust me?”
“No?” My eyebrows furrowed as I looked at him as if he were crazy. Spiderman heaved a loud and long sigh and then extended a hand towards me, through the open window. I crooked an eyebrow at him curiously.
“I want to show you something.” His voice was soft, the voice modulator failed to do its job again, and I found his voice to be—soothing, warm. I gulped, crossing my arms in front of my chest, “I promise you’re safe with me. I saved you once, and I’ll do it as many times I have to.”
“That very weirdly sounds like it could be a love confession, Spiderman.” I said mockingly, but found my legs carrying me closer towards him. I glanced down at my phone to check the clock, and was surprised to see that in half an hour it would be six, “My curfew is at six, though, because of the neighbourhood and my mother not trusting the people yadda-yadda-yadda, so, we have to be back before six.”
“Yeah, that’s totally cool!” Spiderman clapped his hands together, sounding very excited. I chuckled and threw my phone on my bed, chewing my on my bottom lip when I realized I still haven’t texted Yunho back. I shouldn’t make him wait— “Are you coming, then?”
I looked back at Spiderman and took a deep breath—I’m sure Yunho will understand why I didn’t text back right away, I mean, I’m literally about to be kidnapped by Spiderman or whatever—okay, I do hope it’s not actually a kidnapping.
“Where are we going?” I asked as I accepted his extended hand, finding his costume soft to the touch. The white stripes that created the illusion of web on his costume were rougher to the touch, and I tried not to stumble as I climbed through my window, closing it so it wouldn’t look like I had climbed through it. Not that it would matter, if my mother comes inside my room while I’m not here, she’ll call the police in milliseconds.
“It’s a surprise.” Spiderman said cheekily, and his weird black eye winked at me, making me give him a disgusted look, “What?”
“Your eyes are—freaky.” I muttered as I released his hand, patting my clothes down. I adjusted the flannel shirt around my shoulders as they threatened to slip down them.
“You’re full of surprises, Y/N—” Spiderman froze and I did too as we stood staring at each other in silence. Well, I have never told him my name before. Just like I hadn’t told Yunho where I lived when he walked me home the first time from the skatepark.
“It seems like you’re full of surprises too, Spiderman.” I pursed my lips and he cleared his throat, scratching his nape, no doubt feeling awkward.
“Anyways, let’s go.” He extended his hand once again and I chewed on my bottom lip as I weighted my options. To be fair, there’s only two outcomes to this if I leave with him right now. One, he shows me this super awesome surprise, and it’ll be a memory to hold onto. Two, he fucking murders me.
I took a tiny step forward and slipped my hand slowly in his, just now noticing how long and thin his fingers were as they were covered by the red fabric of his costume. I truly hope to God the second option I have in mind doesn’t come to fruition. I might be dead as fuck, but my mother will make sure to kill me twice!
“So, uhm, you, uh, have to hold onto me.” Spiderman was suddenly stammering all over himself, and I narrowed my eyes as I stepped a little closer, allowing this spider boy to sloth his fingers through mine, “Yeah, you have to come a lot closer, actually.”
“Does this usually work?” I asked, stepping in front of him, barely a few inches between us. Jesus Christ, this dude is super tall?! I have to crane my neck to look up at him; his height scarily reminds me of Yunho’s. Not that I have had the chance to stand this close to Yunho before, but his and Mingi’s heights can be quite intimidating at times—especially if Mingi is glaring at you, looking like he wishes your soul would perish right in front of his very eyes. Not cool, nor fun!
“What’s supposed to work?” Spiderman asked, sounding confused.
“Well, this is how you pick up girls, no?” I raised my eyebrows, and I swear to God, Spiderman sputtered for a second.
“No! I—I’ve never done this before!” A small pause, and then more stammering, “I mean—I have! Like, wait, not picking up girls—I’m not doing this to pick you up! However, the thing I’m about to do, yeah, I do it every time I have the suit on. It would be concerning if I didn’t, actually.”
“I’m confused.” I muttered, staring at Spiderman’s broad chest. Jesus, this guy is well doted, alright.
“Whatever, just—hold onto me, tightly.” My eyebrows furrowed as I looked up at Spiderman, only to find him already looking down at me. I sighed and took a second to figure out how to hold onto him while also keeping my distance, and so, I grabbed his shoulders with both hands, gripping it tightly. Spiderman didn’t move just yet, but then I felt his left arm around my middle, pulling me into his body. I tensed and tried to ignore the way my heart started beating fast, a little bit surprised by how warm spidey boy felt against my own body.
And then, without zero fucking preparation, Spiderman released—better said, shot—web from his right wrist—God, I really hope this dude doesn’t actually release these things from his body—and I followed with my eyes the trajectory of the web. And then, I gulped, mouth falling open quickly as Spiderman tested the durability of the web by tugging on it a few times, and then, he threw me a quick glance before he jumped. He jumped up and then—he never fucking made it back to the ground. We didn’t make it back to the ground! I gasped loudly as Spiderman’s arm tightened even more around my middle, our bodies swinging in the fucking air.
And to be fair, if spider boy loses his hearing, it’s not my fault. I didn’t even realize I had started shrieking as Spiderman shot another web from his wrist—ew—the one currently holding us snapping in two, falling to the ground. Consequently, we were free-falling in the air for a second, until our bodies were violently yanked forward again, Spiderman’s web finding the wall of another building. And I was still shrieking—right into his ear—to make matters better.
Spiderman’s hearing after our little escapade? Positively gone.
But hearing his quiet giggle somehow helped in making me shut up after another long minute of me screaming my ass off, heart hammering wildly against my chest. This was not fun! I wanted to go back home! I wanted to—oh, no. I instantly felt nauseous as I made the grave mistake of looking down past Spiderman’s shoulders, coming to the realization that we were up in the air—high up in the air! And I have Acrophobia! I squeaked like a helpless mouse as suddenly I started sweating profusely, fingers digging into Spiderman’s shoulders until I found my arms slipping further up, circling his neck as I clung onto him tightly, our bodies pressed together almost painfully tight. My hands shook as I forced my legs to raise and wrap around his waist, hooking them together behind his ass, squeezing the living shit out of his hips with my thighs. This wasn’t fun! I wasn’t enjoying this! I really really don’t like this surprise and I want to go home right now! On the ground! On my feet! Where it’s safe and I won’t be falling to my death—oh God, stop thinking about that right now!
“I have Acrophobia, you dipshit!” I found myself screaming over the wind blowing in our faces, the sounds of the city underneath us loud and making me squeeze my eyes shut as freaking birds started flying next to us. What the fuck!?
“Oh, fuck.” I heard Spiderman hiss to himself and I wanted to say, ‘yeah, oh fuck, you idiot!’, but I was frozen from fear, and couldn’t help but scream as the feeling of falling down returned, fingers—probably painfully—digging into the back of Spiderman’s head. I hope I yank on his baby hair strong enough to have him squirming in pain—wait, maybe that’s not so smart while we’re literally swinging around above the city and clinging onto some magic web or something! For a second, there was the feeling of free falling again, and then—nothing. The wind wasn’t blowing in our faces anymore, and we weren’t swinging left to right anymore either. Everything stood still around us, cars honking loudly underneath us, and rap music blasting from somewhere—we weren’t dead, right?!
I came to realize my breathing was ragged—now that we were stationary and I could actually think—and that my arms and hands were shaking uncontrollably, my whole body flushed against Spiderman’s as if I wished to become one with him. If that’s what keeps me alive while we swing above the city, we better morph into one person or something! I was too scared to open my eyes, and my muscles tensed even more when I felt two big hands run up and down my back.
“Hey, we’ve landed. You’re not in the air anymore, Y/N.” Spiderman spoke softly, and I felt him turn his head, but I only lowered mine and pressed it against his suited neck. I heard him release a small gasp as I gulped hard, trying to calm my nerves, and fight off a panic attack, “I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were scared of heights.”
“I need a second.” I found my voice as I croaked that out, trying to flex my fingers as they started cramping by how hard I was holding onto Spiderman.
“I can give you three more, if that’s what you need.” I felt Spiderman’s fingers tangle into my untamed hair as he tried to smooth down the wild strands, and I felt my cheeks flush. God, that’s embarrassing now.
“What I need—” I snapped, managing to detach myself from his neck finally, “is to kick your loser ass!”
And then I pried myself off his body and pulled my right fist back to swing it at his bicep. However, to my dismay, he didn’t even as much as flinch, only snorted, “I’ll break your nose if you laugh at me again! I literally have a phobia of heights and you go on and take me on a swing or whatever above the freaking city?! I’m going home—you’ve got to be kidding me.”
But finally taking a look around, realising the whereabouts of our location, I realized Spiderman landed us on a rooftop of a freaking tall building. I swung my fist at his chest this time, “Hey, hey, sorry, I didn’t know! Stop hitting me, Y/N, it tickles—”
“Tickles?!” I exclaimed and gave him a furious look as Spiderman awkwardly scrapped at his nape, angling his head downwards, “I just told you I almost died in your arms, and you tell me my punches tickle?!”
“No, no,” Spiderman suddenly rolled back his shoulders, clutching the bicep I’ve punched a minute ago, “your punches are so strong it could take down even Dr Octopus! I can’t feel my arm anymore.”
“Take down who?” My eyebrows furrowed as I stared at Spiderman, watching his fake act of being hurt as he clutched his arm as if it was about to fall off. Now he was just plainly mocking me.
“Nevermind—I’m sorry, I should have asked if you had a fear of heights first, before I took you here.” Spiderman mumbled as he scratched the back of his head, shuffling on his feet.
“Yeah, uhm, so, what are we doing here?” I asked as I circled my arms around my middle.
“Well, I wanted to show you the view but that’s not possible anymore.” He answered with a sigh, and he sounded quite defeated. I licked my lips and made sure to keep my eyes on the rooftop’s ground instead of looking around. I would pass out surely, and my hands are still trembling, my heart beating fast.
“Is this spot significant or something?” I mumbled as I kicked at nothing in particular.
“Yeah, when I’m stressed or worried, I come here to clear my mind.” Spiderman answered, walking to the edge of the rooftop. My heart did a somersault until I remembered literally nothing can happen to him, he sticks to things like a real spider—freaky.
“So, what’s got your stressed or worried right now?” I found myself asking as I crouched down, a little nauseated when Spiderman leaned over the edge, staring down at the bustling city underneath us. The people on the streets, the honking cars and music coming from down the street created a disturbing cacophony up here, but down there, it never sounded this messy.
“Nothing, I just wished to show you this place.”
“Why?” I asked as I looked up, finding him already looking at me. His eyes blinked, a feature of his mask I wished he didn’t have. It was weird, I didn’t like it.
“No particular reason.” Spiderman answered after he cleared his throat, however it didn’t sound sincere. He averted his eyes as he turned around and sat down on the ledge, swinging his legs over. I inhaled sharply, palms balling up into fists at his actions. I had to remind himself that he literally can’t die even if the wind pushes him over. Me—on the other hand—can and would one hundred percent die. And so, I found myself on my knees and hands as I slowly crawled towards him, trying to regulate my breaths as my heart started hammering in my chest again. As Spiderman heard movement, he tuned his head abruptly.
“What are you doing?” He sounded amused as he asked, looking down at me with his freaky blinking black mask eyes.
“I’m joining you without actually joining you.” I muttered as I reached the ledge, thankfully the brick wall reached up to one’s waist and I couldn’t see down as I sat down, turning my back to the ledge, and leaning against the cold structure. Spiderman’s eyes remained on me as I hugged my knees to my chest before I looked up at him, “Well, I’m sure the view is pretty.”
“Yeah, it is.” He whispered; eyes boring into mine. I gulped, something stirring in my stomach. I seriously am not about to develop a stupid crush on Spiderman too, right?! That would be freaking embarrassing. I already have a crush on Yunho and it’s more than enough—in fact, it’s fucking mortifying, because how am I supposed to act normal when I’m around him, and all I want to do is get lost in his beautiful chocolate brown eyes and listen to his soft voice all day long while demanding him to engulf me in his warm arms, swallow me up against his broad chest?! I have to stop thinking about Yunho right now—or whenever I feel my mind slipping into delusion land.
“So, Spiderman, what’s your story?” I raised my eyebrows at him, chuckling as Yunho came to mind again despite my efforts, “I have a friend who’s in love with you—”
“He’s not—” Spiderman cleared his throat, patting his chest, “Sorry, you were saying?”
“Right,” I narrowed my eyes at the guy and he swiftly turned his head away, looking down at the city, “so, I have this friend who really likes you—even has a Spiderman phone case—and I’m just curious to hear your story. You know, from someone who’s not a die-hard fan and sugarcoats things.”
“There’s no big story, to be honest.” Spiderman shrugged, fiddling with his fingers in his lap—Yunho often does that when he’s nervous, “I try to keep the order in the city and help the innocent, and those in need. It took the police some time until they started trusting me and liking me, but things aren’t as chaotic as they were before.”
“But, wait.” My eyebrows furrowed as I crossed my arms in front of my chest, “If you’re eighteen now, for how long have you been Spiderman? Assuming that you weren’t born like this…?”
“It’s almost scary how much you know about me.” Spiderman teased and I huffed, rolling my eyes, “I’ve been Spiderman ever since I turned sixteen.”
“Wow.” I muttered, looking back up at the guy. He’s been putting his life on the line for two years now, that’s really selfless. Perhaps I can see why Yunho admires him so much, “Are you ever scared? That you’ll get really hurt or something. Does anyone know your real identity?”
“Yes, I do get scared, and yes, the guy who I grew up with knows about my identity.” The guy answered, placing his hands on both sides of his thighs as he started swinging his legs, “I can’t tell many people though, and that was really hard at the beginning. I hate lying, can’t lie well either if I’m being honest, and it just feels wrong to keep secrets from the people closest to me. However, it ensures their safety, so, at the same time I don’t mind keeping it from them.”
“For an eighteen-year-old dude,” I chuckled, leaning my head back against the brick wall, “you are quite mature.”
“Well, when you chase and fight criminals daily, you are forced to mature early.”
“Did you want to become like this? Turn into Spiderman?”
“No, my high-school was visiting a lab and a spider that was genetically mutated bit me.” Spiderman’s voice was quiet, and he sighed loudly soon after, “In case you’re wondering, I don’t regret it. I love being Spiderman even if at times I have to bring sacrifices.”
“Yeah, that’s unpleasant.” I muttered, resting my chin on my knees. I knew what it meant to bring sacrifices for those you loved, and it almost always wasn’t by your choice, but something you just had to do. Ugh, not me suddenly turning bitter and nostalgic. Spiderman coughed shortly, and I felt fingers in my hair. I tensed for a second, but then his long fingers were out of my hair the following second.
“You had a bug in your hair.” Spiderman explained and I hummed, turning my head to rest my right cheek on my knees so that I could look up at him, “What about you, Y/N, what’s your story?”
I chuckled, averting my eyes as I pursed my lips, “It’s not as noble as yours, that’s for sure, spidey boy.”
“I don’t mind.”
“Well, there’s just my mom and I around, and we’ve moved to the city two weeks ago.” I sighed, closing my eyes as the evening breeze picked up, it wasn’t warm, but at least it wasn’t too cold just yet, “My father abandoned us a month before I was born, so my mom raised me up all alone with her mother’s help sometimes. She had her fair share of questionable partners, but they were never as evil as her last ex-fiancé.
“The guy was a criminal, he murdered three people and then tried to blame it on being so crazily in love with my mother that he wasn’t completely sane anymore. It was fucking comical; I hate that piece of shit. He’s threatened me numerous times and would throw me around the house when mom wasn’t around, saying how I’d end up six feet under if I didn’t keep my mouth shut about it.
“He never liked me for some reason, always claimed my mom focused more on me than on him—the fucking idiot. He has hit me a few times, and once my mother finally noticed, she tried to leave him, but he threatened to kill us. It was crazy, absolute madness, trying to get away from him—until the police came knocking on our door one night, claiming that they were there to arrest my mom’s ex for murder. The whole town was freaking shook, us included.”
Well, and that’s on trauma dumping, I guess. But he asked, after all, and I just told Mr. Spidey my story. It felt nice letting someone know about my past, however, it didn’t exactly feel right that I said all that to a stranger. I always thought Yunho would be the first person to find out about the whole story behind our recent move.
I gulped, feeling slightly guilty for having told all that to Spiderman, and I jumped when I felt fingers touching my cheek. I blinked my eyes open, finding Spiderman on his knees as he was leaned over, down towards me, fingers gently pressing against my cheek, “Nothing like that will ever again happen to you, Y/N, I promise. As long as I live, I promise to protect you.”
My eyebrows furrowed as I raised my head up from my knees, Spiderman’s warm hand cupping my face, “You don’t even know me, Spiderman.”
“I know enough.” He whispered and I gulped, heart beating fast as we gazed into each other’s eyes, his black mask unblinking for once. My lips parted and I shivered as the breeze turned stronger, Spiderman’s thumb gently rubbing my chin. It felt like I couldn’t look away, like the gap was slowly closing between us—until an alarm went off blaring, making both of us jump. Spiderman was up on his feet in a second, looking down at his wrist watch.
“Well, your curfew starts in ten minutes.” His voice was a little hoarse and he quickly cleared his throat, “We should head back if we don’t want your mom freaking out.”
“I’m not swinging around in your arms above the city again, Spidey!” I snapped, giving him a pointed glare as he jumped off the ledge, crouching down in front of me.
“The closest station is a five-minute walk away from here and the bus won’t come for another ten minutes. If I count correctly, that’s past your curfew, and there’s no direct bus to your neighbourhood from here.” Spiderman sounded smug as I narrowed my eyes at him.
“Where even are we?”
“The east end of the city—”
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” I groaned, squeezing my eyes shut. That’s a fourteen-minute ride by bus! My mom is so going to kill me tonight.
“Just hold on tight, and I promise not to drop you—”
“That’s not funny!” I snapped as I shakily stood, glaring at Spiderman. But he just chuckled, clearly amused.
“You were like a koala when we came here, it was cute.”
“Shut up.” I grumbled, trying to ignore the way my cheeks flushed when Spiderman opened his arms for me. This is the first and last time he carries me around the city like this.
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            Spiderman didn’t show up again at my window to whisk me away for a—swing? —maybe he was just too embarrassed to show his face again. Well, masked face. Admittedly, there’s been only three days since I was visited by the superhero, randomly on a Tuesday afternoon, and trust for me to brag all about it to Yunho. Not that I was mocking him—maybe a little bit—about getting to meet his superhero in person before he did, it’s just that it was funny seeing his reactions as I retold everything to him. He seemed to be even more excited when he heard it in person, as I had called him the second I got home from the outing. Now, school was finally over and I could go home and sleep. The city was buzzing with life last night and the police raided our street around midnight, talk about a man having escaped form an asylum spread around fast. Apparently, the man had been hiding in the basement of one of my neighbour’s houses’. Creepy. Spiderman, surprisingly, didn’t show up, but I suppose it wasn’t necessarily an emergency as it wasn’t a very dangerous person. Besides, I think Spiderman also needs his beauty sleep—like us, mere mortals do.
I stretched as we walked through the gates of the high-school, greeting the groundkeeper as he shot us a look since San was cackling loudly as he watched a video on his phone, volume cranked up to the maximum. Mingi had his arm thrown around Yunho’s shoulders, lips pursed as he watched some younger girls run past them while giggling and shooting them stares.
“Do you think Bomi will finally ask me out?” Mingi mused quietly, turning his head to stare at the long-haired girl that had just passed by with her friends.
“Don’t know, have you finally spoken to each other?” Yunho raised his eyebrows at his best friend, expertly grabbing the strap of my backpack as he halted my steps, yanking me backwards and out of the way of a speeding bike.
“Jesus.” I hissed, clutching my skateboard to my chest, “What an idiot—”
“Hey, watch it, you!” San shouted after the guy, who was already at the end of the street, “You could run over someone!”
“Nice reflexes.” Mingi teased, and detached himself from his friend at last. I gulped and turned to thank Yunho; my cheeks flushed pink. Well, that was embarrassing, but it could’ve ended a lot worse.
“Thank you.”
“No problem.” Yunho’s smile was soft and warm, and I gulped, averting my eyes quickly. But fucking hell, Mingi and I made eye contact, and he narrowed his eyes at me. That dude is onto something and I don’t like how easily he can see right through me.
“We haven’t spoken to each other yet…” Mingi casually continued the conversation he was having with Yunho, deep voice trailing off.
San chuckled amused, finally stopping the video on his phone as he raised his head, “Well, then, what are you expecting? She won’t ask you out if you don’t talk to her—wait, why are you sure she’s into you? She could be into me, or even Yunho.”
I pursed my lips, totally not feeling jealous over the fact that other living people could have a crush on Yunho! And let’s be real, who the hell wouldn’t have a crush on freaking Yunho?! He’s basically—perfect!
“You underestimate my awesomeness, San.” Mingi huffed, crossing his arms in front of his chest, “And she’s not into you, you’re too short.”
“Hey, I’m not short!” San exclaimed offended, then looked at me with round eyes, “I’m not short, right?!”
“Of course not.” I chuckled, smiling at him, “It’s Mingi who’s too tall.”
“Says the midget.” Mingi scoffed, throwing me a glare. Will this dude ever like me?
“Okay, let’s stop shaming each other for our heights—or anything else, actually.” Yunho, always the peacemaker, grinned as he squeezed Mingi’s shoulder once, and then draped his long arm around my own shoulders, making my heart somersault in my chest.
“We’ll talk about this more later,” San said, eyes narrowed, “I have to catch my bus now, see ya!”
And with a wave, he ran off, totally in the complete opposite of where his bus stop was. I watched on as he caught up with a guy from our class, I have finally learned his name—Jung Wooyoung—and the two hugged briefly as San grabbed the guy’s arm and started yanking him towards the metro station. Yeah, they certainly weren’t headed home.
“Are you coming over?” I focused back on the two tall best friends, Mingi’s voice quiet as he looked at Yunho. I knew the offer didn’t stand for me as well, Mingi would never invite me over to his place.
“Not today.” Yunho had an apologetic look on his face, and then he squeezed my shoulder, “I’ve got something else to do.”
“Asshole,” Mingi whispered with a pout as a black car pulled up next to us, “see you two tomorrow, then.”
“Stop being so dramatic, you know I love you.” Yunho managed to ruffle Mingi’s hair before he got in the car, making Mingi scoff as a smile blossomed on his face.
“Yeah, whatever, love you too.” And then he opened the door and sat inside, but he didn’t close the door until the threw me a look that made me gulp. What did I do to make this guy dislike me so much?! At this point, I have given up, there’s no point in trying to decipher the riddle that Song Mingi is.
Suddenly, super aware that Yunho and I were alone now as the black car drove off, I gulped and clutched my skateboard just a little tighter. I took a peek at Yunho, and he was already looking down at me with a small smile, “So, do you want to go home right away?”
“Depends, why?” I asked quietly, praying to God my face wouldn’t turn into a tomato as Yunho slightly leaned down, closer to my face.
“There’s a really nice park not even ten minutes away from here, wanna go?” Of course, I want to go, Jeong Yunho.
“Sure.” I nodded, smiling back at him, face burning. Great, only a blind man would be oblivious to the fat-ass crush I have on Yunho at this point! It’s so embarrassing, but I can’t help it when he looks so—cute!
“See that convenience store there?” He turned his head and pointed at the store, which was just down the road. I nodded, and looked at him with a questioning gaze, “Race you there!”
And before I could fully register what he said, Yunho released me and took off in a sprint towards the convenience store. My mouth opened in surprise and I blinked, finally somehow realizing we were competing to see who gets there first. But with Yunho having a head start, I grinned and dropped my skateboard onto the ground. I quickly pushed off and gained more speed as I manoeuvred between the people on the sidewalk, grinning from ear to ear as I started gaining on Yunho. He’s really fast, but it shouldn’t be so surprising as I have seen him in P.E. class already, and he’s one of the best athletes I know. He’s agile and super-fast, he has good reflexes, and is a total team player. The guys love picking him in their team when they are playing football. I giggled as I came up just behind Yunho, pushing harder as my foot hit the pavement, the wind whipping my hair in my face for a second as the store came into view. We were almost there. I did an ollie to jump over the top of a drain, managing to come up a little ahead of Yunho. I laughed as I rolled forward, just barely making it to the convenience store first. I did a small spin and then set my foot down, coming to a stop as Yunho reached me. He was breathing hard as he leaned over, placing his hands on his knees. I grinned at him, and gripped the foot of my skateboard, reaching out to ruffle his fluffy greyish-greenish-blueish hair. I have never done that before, and for a second, I panicked, but Yunho didn’t react badly to my action, he just smiled and shook his head.
“I didn’t think I’d lose.” He said with a laugh and then stood up straight, running his long fingers through his hair. He wore more rings today, and one looked suspiciously like a ring I have seen Mingi wear before.
“You can’t win at everything, Yunho.” I stuck my tongue out playfully before I turned to walk inside the convenience store, “I’ve never met a more competitive person than you are.”
“Sorry, I can’t help it,” Yunho chuckled as he followed closely behind me, looking at the shelves as we went down the snack aisle, “But you can’t say it wasn’t fun.”
“It was.” I looked over my shoulder with a grin as Yunho grabbed some potato chips off a high shelf, “But next time give me a warning, I only got lucky because I had my skateboard with me. You didn’t play fairly.”
Yunho chuckled and I grabbed some salty crackers, “Sometimes we need the element of surprise, Y/N, in order to excel.”
“Aha, so now you’re saying you knew I would win if you didn’t warn me first?” I raised an eyebrow at him, making Yunho chuckle as he grabbed my shoulder and veered me towards the fridges in the back.
“I knew you’d win.” He muttered and I tried not to blush—again—as I opened the fridge and grabbed some Sprite, while Yunho grabbed a larger bottle of water, leaning over me to retrieve it and—yeah, I tried not to pass out as I felt his breath hit the top of my head, his warmth radiating off him due to our closeness. However, the moment was over as quickly as it came.
Thankfully, I still had the money my mother gave me last week, otherwise it’d be really embarrassing to have Yunho buy something for me again. Well, technically, last time neither one of us paid for it at Hongjoong’s store, but still. I didn’t want him paying for my things, I’d feel like I owe it to him now.
We approached the front desk and the clerk looked very bored and done with us as he gave us a glare—similar to Mingi’s, and it made snort quietly—as he scanned our items. I had pulled the money out of the front pocket of my backpack as the clerk told us our total, and I was totally handing him the amount I had to pay for, when Yunho pushed my wrist to the side and placed the whole sum on the counter. I opened my mouth to clearly argue with him, but he grabbed our items and grinned so widely I feared it would be the reason why I’d go blind—and not from the fact that I’ve been trying to look into the sun for ages now without squinting my eyes, not too smart, but I never claimed to be smart. I muttered a goodbye to the clerk as Yunho pushed the door open for me and stepped outside to make enough space for me to pass through the narrow doorway.
“Let me carry my things.” I said as the door closed behind us, but Yunho just shook his head.
“You have to carry your skateboard, don’t fret about it.” My eyebrows furrowed as he took off towards the park he had mention, I could see it from here. It was just a little up ahead of us, to the right, between three buildings.
“I’ll give you my part of the sum when we have sat down.” I said as I tried to keep up with his long strides—damn his long legs, God has favourites, and as much as Yunho is one of his favourites, I certainly am not.
“Nah, you don’t have to.” Yunho grinned, and I noticed a gummy worm hanging out from the corner of his mouth.
“Yes, I do.” I huffed, walking towards the gate of the park, “And where’d you get that gummy from?”
“From here.” And he pointed at the pocket of his suit jacket—who the hell wears a suit jacket to school, good lord it’s so hot when Yunho wears it, I seriously had trouble focusing all day long because of it. I reached my hand out and stole a gummy worm from his pocket, giggling as I made disgusting slurping noises as I put it in my mouth, and sucked it in in one go. Yunho’s eyebrows raised before he burst out into deep giggles, throwing his head back a little—and I choked, almost. I coughed as the gummy worm almost managed to slip down my throat, but I saved it somehow last minute. Eating gummy worms around Jeong Yunho is dangerous, noted.
“Why was that kind of cute?” Yunho asked with a chuckle as he chose a spot to sit, underneath a tall tree, offering us enough shade from the, now, not so hot sun. I placed my skateboard down, and followed Yunho as he plopped down, the sound of his butt colliding with the grass making me snort. He looked up at me with a pout and then grabbed my arm and pulled me down, almost making me fall into his freaking lap. It didn’t even take a second for my cheeks to turn pink, and I threw Yunho a small glare as I regained my balance and sat down next to him, mirroring his position. Our backs were leaning against the tree, legs splayed out long in front of us as I took my crackers and Sprite from Yunho.
“What was cute?” I asked as I opened the bag of crackers, desperate to wash away the extra sweet taste that remained in my mouth due to the gummy worm.
“You,” Yunho muttered, opening his water bottle, “and the sound you made. You’re funny.”
“I didn’t think you’d find me acting like an Ogre cute, but thank you, I guess.” My comment made Yunho laugh hard again as he threw his head back, prompting me to giggle along. His laughter was contagious, and I realized my stomach was coiling tightly—and not due to the sweets and unhealthy food I have digested so far today. It was because of Yunho, and because all I want to do right now is to lean up and press a kiss against his cheek. God dammit.
“You’d make a cute Ogre.” Yunho mused once he had calmed down, then took a sip of his water.
“Please,” I playfully rolled my eyes, popping another salty cracker into my mouth, “you’d be totally into the green swamp monster I’d turn into. Fiona’s got nothing on me.”
“Not the way I thought you’d find this out about me, but—” Yunho paused for dramatic effect, and I raised my eyebrows at him, “I’m totally into Fiona, have been since I was little.”
“Oh, my God!” I cackled, shielding my mouth with my hand as I still haven’t chewed all the crackers, “Yunho! That’s just—you have to explain yourself now!”
“Why, don’t tell me you never had a crush on a fictional character!?” Yunho exclaimed, sounding exasperated as he bumped his shoulder against mine. I licked my lips and tried not to burst out laughing at the memory of who I’ve always had a crush on when I was younger.
“Okay…” I took a deep breath and turned my head to face Yunho, “Have you ever heard about the cartoon ‘W.I.T.C.H.’?”
“Yeah, Hongjoong really liked it while we were growing up,” Yunho said with a chuckle, “He’d make us watch it every evening when they played it on the TV, I think he was into Cornelia.”
“Well, Cornelia is a good, and hot, choice to have a crush on, indeed.” I pursed my lips and offered my bag of crackers to Yunho, who took one with a small grin, “I mean, I was totally into Caleb, but—”
“Really? Caleb?” Yunho asked surprised, narrowing his eyes, “I thought you’re more of a Matt girl.”
“Well, I’m actual neither a Caleb nor Matt girl, Yunho.” I giggled, leaning in closer as if I was telling a secret, “You see, I always found myself blushing a little bit too hard when Lord Cedric was on the screen—”
“No way!” Yunho exclaimed, eyes turning round as he looked shocked, “The snake guy?!”
“Well, don’t look at me like that after admitting you’re into Fiona!” I exclaimed back with a laugh, making Yunho look at me like I was crazy.
“Fiona was a princess who decided to turn into an Ogre to stay with the love of her life, meanwhile, Lord Cedric was obsessed with his king, he could into a snake, and he once ate someone, Y/N!” I bit my bottom lip, trying not to laugh at how passionate Yunho was all of a sudden.
“Each to its own, I guess.” I said nonchalantly with a shrug, making Yunho’s initial shock turn into amusement as he started laughing once again. I’ve never heard him laugh so much before, and I found myself smiling at him as his ears turned slightly rosy, eyes screwed shut as his shoulders shook from laughter. He looked completely and absolutely beautiful, and my heart was hammering against my ribcage, threating to fall out of my ass at any given moment. Oh, God, I’m so screwed.
“I swear to God, you and Mingi are cut from the same cloth. He’s also into weird humanlike creatures or something.” Yunho said once he had calmed down, and I quickly turned my head away when he looked at me, feeling like he caught me staring and admiring him.
“Not you shaming both Mingi and I for having silly childhood crushes.” I said with a pout, throwing a cracker into my mouth.
“Mingi still crushes on characters like those, though.” I chuckled, glancing at Yunho from the corner of my eyes, finding him looking at me with a small smile on his lips, cheeks flushed. God, he’s not blushing, right?! Why would he blush, it must be the sun. Yup, certainly the sun!
“I’ll tell him you made fun of him behind his back.” I teased as Yunho grabbed a cracker, leaning his head back against the tree.
“I fear it won’t phase him; San makes fun of him daily for it.” Yunho said, sounding amused. I chuckled and copied Yunho as I leaned my head back against the tree too, suddenly becoming aware of how close we were sitting next to each other. Our shoulders and thighs were pressed together, and Yunho’s elbow was softly poking into my stomach. I bit my lower lip and allowed the comfortable silence to settle upon us, watching the people that passed by the park. The traffic wasn’t so bad here, and there was a bus stop straight across the park. A sports car, with a super loud engine drove past, the sound making me wince for a second. And as I watched a mother with her two children open the gate of the park, I felt a hand in my hair, fingers twirling a longer strand. My heart stilled for a second, knowing well that it was Yunho, and I took a peek at him.
“Oh,” He suddenly retracted his hand, looking away embarrassed, “sorry, there was uh—something in your hair. A bug.”
Funny, Spiderman did that too.
“Thanks.” I offered him a small smile and watched as he scratched the back of his head awkwardly, funny how that now reminded me of Spiderman too, “I hate bugs.”
“I’m not afraid of them.” Yunho said as he finally looked me in the eyes, his ears, however, still slightly red.
“Aren’t you a cool guy, Jeong Yunho?” I winked playfully and Yunho chuckled before we became silent again. I popped another cracker into my mouth and then offered the bag to Yunho, who took some more, and funnily stuffed his mouth full of them. I chuckled and proceeded to eat some more too, placing my left hand on my thigh as I tried to enjoy this peaceful moment. I’ve never had this back in my hometown. I didn’t have many people to hang out with, and the ones I did hang out with were always the bad type of kids, kids who wanted to break the rules and bother others. It was nice to finally embrace the tranquillity, and just simply exist without ruining others fun. Many people didn’t like me back in my hometown due to me associating myself with those rascals.
Lost in my thoughts, I failed to notice that something was softly poking my hand, the feeling just barely there, like the ghost of a touch. I watched the two children play around, climb into the smaller trees and wave at their mother as they laughed. When the light touch became more insistent, I flipped my hand around, thinking it was just an ant or something that I could flick away, but instead, I felt warm fingertips just barely trace the lines of my palm. I gulped and tried not to tense up as I looked down, eyes falling on Yunho’s hand as his long fingers pushed a little more decisively against my palm. I blinked and looked up at Yunho, but he was looking down at our hands, lips parted as if he was in a trance. I was curious—I had to know—so without thinking much, I gently intertwined our fingers, and waited. For something to happen, anything. But other than a tiny smile appearing on Yunho’s lips and his grip turning slightly firmer, nothing happened. Well, nothing besides the frightening feeling of my heart exploding out of my chest, and my cheeks burning so much you could probably fry a steak on it or something. I didn’t know where to put this exactly, what to think of it, but the seemingly trance Yunho was in, was broken the second loud sirens rung and police cars were suddenly wheezing down the street, the loud noise disturbing the tranquil atmosphere that had settled around us. Yunho became instantly tense as his head snapped up, eyes focused up ahead as he untangled his hand from mine, grabbing his backpack. I watched him curiously as he took his phone and opened it up, eyebrows furrowing deeply.
“I—I, uh, I have to go.” My eyebrows furrowed as I watched Yunho scramble up, leaving his water and potato chips on the ground, “My mom just texted me; something came up—I have to go.”
“Is everything alright?” I asked worried, watching Yunho bounce on his feet as he looked one second away from sprinting off.
“Yeah, it’s—everything’s okay, I just really have to go right now.” He finally looked at me, chewing on his bottom lip, looking like he was hesitating, “Don’t wait for me, your bus will come in ten minutes. Get home safely, text me when you do.”
“Oh, okay, uhm, you take care too.” But Yunho ran off before I could even finish my sentence, and I watched impressed as he jumped over the fence—which wasn’t very tall, but I wouldn’t have been able to do that surely—and then he was sprinting down the sidewalk, apologising to people as he had to push them out of his way.
Huh, that was weird and another interesting coincidence. I couldn’t help but think back to Mingi mentioning Yunho’s disappearances whenever something major and bad was happening in the city. Certainly, they were mere coincidences.
            But Yunho never quite texted back yesterday, and it would be a lie if I say I didn’t worry about him. His departure from the park was sudden, and his absence conjured up all sorts of thoughts in my mind. It was strange and very unlike Yunho. When I was on the bus, headed to school and completely sleepy and almost out of it, I was scrolling through Tik Tok, trying to awaken myself a little bit after I have texted San to inquire information about Yunho. He reassured me that there were days when Yunho would go low on contact, but he was completely fine, and that usually he spent his time with family when he wouldn’t text back. I could understand that, but it still worried me. Just as I was about to exit the app, I came across a crappy video on my for your page that depicted many police cars and even more officers as they had someone surrounded. And then, the superhero, the one that always saves the day around here, Spiderman swooped in and all you could see was his web flying around, and a man getting strapped to a pole until a gunshot rang out followed by a loud cry of pain, and then the video cut off. My eyebrows furrowed as I let it replay again, chewing on my bottom lip nervously. Who got hurt? You couldn’t see it in the video, and I couldn’t help but think that it was Spiderman. Without thinking much, I sent the video to San and asked if he knew anything. The reply, unsurprisingly, came fast, and he said that Spiderman got injured yesterday as one of the criminal’s managed to escape. He got shot in his left leg. I cringed at the thought, and then put my phone away having arrived to the high-school. I certainly wasn’t in the mood nor headspace to attend any of my classes today, but at least I’d get to see Yunho, and make sure that he’s okay.
Except that, very uncharacteristically to Yunho, he showed up a little late to our first class, and he even looked quite dishevelled with dark bags under his eyes. He looked like he didn’t have a good night’s sleep and—I almost failed to notice the slight limp he had in his left leg. Huh, I wonder if anything happened, or have I started seeing things now? However, I didn’t get many chances to ask Yunho about it as he seemed to be always busy talking to our teachers, or to everyone else in the hallways, barely paying attention to San, Mingi, or even me. It was strange, but San said it was completely normal behaviour coming from Yunho, and that he’d do this from time to time when he felt pressured. Apparently, Yunho rarely opens up to his best friends as he hates bothering others with his issues. But I wanted to know what was bothering him. He wouldn’t be a bother to me. But I couldn’t do that as he only sat for us for five minutes in the canteen during our lunch break, and then rushed off saying he had something to take care of. But after that, he never returned to classes. My texts also went unanswered, and by the evening, I was positively nervous and stressed out of my mind by the fact that I didn’t know what was wrong. I even debated on asking San for Yunho’s home address to pay him a quick visit in order to make sure that he was indeed okay. Even my mom noticed how absentminded and worried I was during dinner, but didn’t pester me much when I lied that the teachers were stressing me out with upcoming tests—which maybe wasn’t too smart as she told me I should study even more. Ugh.
Currently, we have finished having dinner and I have tied the trash bag together to take the trash out. I slipped on my outdoor shoes swiftly and unlocked the front door, my mom’s series playing loudly in the living room as she giggled at whatever was said. The air was chilly outside and the single long-sleeved blouse and joggers I was wearing did an awful job at keeping me warm, so, I quickly skipped down the stairs and went to the small alley between our house and the building. That’s where the big trash bins were, by the tall fence. It was dark outside, so I tried to be quick as I dragged the trash bag after me, shivering due to the cold. I huffed loudly, smog leaving my mouth, as I rounded the corner and gave the short alleyway a quick check that it was empty before I hurried down, opening the big trash bin. I threw the bag inside and let it shut loudly afterwards. I rubbed my arms up and down as I turned around and walked back down the alleyway, gasping loudly as a silhouette appeared right around the corner. It was hunched over slightly and breathing loudly, groaning too. God, I fucking hate this neighbourhood, why do I always have to encounter random drunk people or even worse—criminals!? But I really had to head back inside the house—climbing through my window wasn’t an option as it was locked—and I willed myself to just run past them and back inside the safety of my house. However, just as I made it under the streetlamp, I paused. The red and blue suit was torn at the chest, and Spiderman seemed to be struggling to stand up straight.
“Oh, my God!” I whispered, approaching him, “What happened to you?!”
“Oh, Y/N.” He muttered, groaning again as he tried to stand up tall.
“Stop that,” I hissed, eyebrows furrowing as I tried to inspect his wound, but it wasn’t visible through the gash on the suit, “Come on.”
Spiderman only resisted for a second as I placed his arm around my shoulders, offering him support as he leaned against my much smaller frame. He was heavy, but I was determined, and the front porch was barely a few steps away, “What are you doing?”
“Taking you inside my house, think you can keep quiet until we reach my room?” I looked up at Spiderman, who gulped as we reached the front steps.
“Yeah.” He whispered and I let out a small sigh, taking one step at a time as we ascended the stairs. I pushed the door open carefully and walked us inside, pausing in the hallway to make sure my mother was still in the living room, watching her series. I looked at Spiderman and signalled to him to remain quiet as I lead us down the hallway, headed for my room. I opened the door and helped him towards my bed, on which he fell down quite unceremoniously, groaning loudly.
“Okay, you still have to keep quiet.” I said with a frown, glancing behind me, “I’ll be back in a second with a medical kit.”
Spiderman nodded and I swiftly left my room, pulling the door shut until it was only slightly ajar, and sneaked back down the hallway. I opened the front door again and closed it louder, locking it up, “Mom, I’m going to bed now! I’m really sleepy.”
“Alright, sweet dreams, honey.” She threw a flying kiss my way as she glanced back and I smiled, catching it playfully before I was off, headed for the bathroom. I took the medical kit from underneath the small cupboard we had in there, and then I was back inside my room, closing and locking the door after myself.
“Alright,” I whispered, looking at Spiderman and trying not to panic as I noticed blood seeping through his suit, “how do we do this?”
“Uh,” He groaned again, sitting up lightly, “you can patch me up through the costume.”
“I can?” I muttered confused as I walked closer, placing the kit down by the bed as I crouched down. I leaned closer to his chest and carefully touched the costume, not too surprised to find it not peeling off his body, “I can’t, Spiderman, the costume literally clings to your body.”
“Oh, that’s not good.” He mused, scratching his nape, “I have to take it off, then.”
“Oh—like—the whole costume?” My voice was squeaky all of a sudden, and I averted my eyes as I felt myself blush lightly.
“Uh, yeah.” Spiderman whispered and I gulped, trying not to freak out. Yeah, this is cool and totally okay, nothing too sensational. I’m just helping a wounded guy, no biggie, it’s not like I’m going to see him naked! He must have underwear on, right?!
“I think I accidentally took some of my mom’s exe’s clothes with me when I was packing, let me check.” And I stood up and hurried over to my closet, finding the sweatpants and t-shirt that I had in mind.
“Great.” Spiderman grumbled and I rolled my eyes.
“Hey, you don’t get to be picky when you’re about to bleed out on my bed!” I hissed, trying to control my tone and not raise my voice out of fear of alerting my mom.
“Right, sorry.” Spiderman muttered and I approached him again.
“How do we take the suit off?” I asked, eyebrows furrowed. I’ve never seen something like this before, so I have no idea what superheroes do in this case.
“There’s a zipper on the back.” He explained and I nodded, going to the side of the bed to be able to see Spiderman’s back.
“Will—will the mask come off too?” I asked in a whisper as I hesitated to touch the zipper.
“No, don’t worry.” Spiderman answered and I huffed, gripping the zipper and carefully undoing it. It went all the way down to his lower back, and I blinked a few times as I tried to ignore the smooth skin underneath the suit.
“Uh, right, I assume you can undress yourself the rest of the way?” I asked as I stepped back, averting my eyes as my cheeks were burning.
“Yeah, one second.” Spiderman huffed and he carefully stood, groaning quietly. I closed my eyes and shrivelled around, not too keen of staring at him while he changes out of his costume. I might see something I don’t want to, and that’s not cool. I listened closely as he shuffled around, groaned a few times, and then plopped back down on the bed, “Okay, I have changed.”
“Great—” I gasped as my eyes fell on his exposed torso, eyes widening at the big gash running across his chest, “Shouldn’t you be in the hospital right now?!”
Spiderman chuckled, and my eyebrows furrowed more as I went back to my previous position in front of him. I kneeled and took the medical kit, opening it up.
“If we clean the wound, it’ll take around two to three hours to heal by itself.” He said, tone reassuring as I grabbed some gauze and rubbing alcohol, “I’ll be fine, don’t worry.”
“So, then, did you get shot yesterday?” I asked, pouring rubbing alcohol on the gauze before I looked up, “I saw the videos.”
The sight of having Spiderman in nothing but sweatpants and his mask, sitting on my is bed certainly—a sight to behold. Perhaps if he wasn’t hurt at the moment, I’d be gaping at his well-defined physique, his lean muscles, the faint abs on his stomach, his wide shoulder and broad chest—focus, woman!
“Yeah, I did get shot.” Spiderman said, and I hoped he’d ignore the way I tried not to thirst over his body. I’m such a horrible person right now, kill me.
“This will hurt, I assume.” I warned as I leaned up and gently pressed the gauze against the edge of the gash, making Spiderman hiss, “Sorry, I did warn you though.”
“I know, don’t worry.” He chuckled and I noticed his hands balling up the blanket as he gulped loudly the lower my hand slipped on the gash, trying to clean the wound as carefully but thoroughly as possible.
“Is your leg fine, then?” I asked, trying to avert his attention from the pain. Spiderman hummed, low in his chest, almost rumbling under my touch. I gulped and tried to focus—this is so not the moment to even think to fantasize about this superhero dude!
“It’s a bit still sore, the bullet went in deep, but it healed up by noon.” He explained and I hummed, for some reason finding it weird that Yunho seemed to be limping this morning, and that he disappeared around noon. Certainly, I was playing along to Mingi’s delusions and suspicions about Yunho at this point, and I don’t even spend that much time with Mingi. It’s ridiculous. How could Yunho be Spiderman? But then again…is it really that unbelievable? It could be anyone, for God’s sake, even me! Well, obviously not me, but you know what I mean!
“I’m glad that’s healed.” I muttered, getting to the other end of the gash finally, “Are you sure this one doesn’t need stitches, it looks to be deep, Mr. Spidey.”
Spiderman chuckled, and I felt his hand wrap around my wrist as I dabbed the gauze against the wound again. I froze, eyes widening a little at the familiarity of the touch. Yunho’s hands are always warm and quite big, his fingers long. I bit my bottom lip as I looked down at Spiderman’s hand, noticing the marks that looked like they were left by rings. Yunho would also have marks left by rings on his fingers on days he didn’t feel like wearing them. I gulped and then looked up; Spiderman’s freaky black masked eyes unblinking as he looked down at me.
“It won’t need stitches, Y/N.” He whispered, and a tingle ran down my spine, making me gulp down nothing in particular, having to clear my throat as I averted my eyes, gently pulling my hand back. Spiderman released his grip on me instantly and followed me with his eyes as I threw the bloody gauze back inside the medical kit until I’d throw it away. I then stood, rubbing my hands together as I didn’t know what to do next.
“I, uh—is that enough?” I asked, motioning towards the clean gash now, averting my eyes from his torso when they threatened to run all over it again.
“Yes, thank you.” Spiderman muttered, and I could hear the smile in his voice, “You’re an angel.”
Oh, fuck. My cheeks flushed instantly and I pulled my hair behind my ears as I cleared my throat again, looking past Spiderman, at my poster covered wall, “Right, yeah, uh—do you need anything else?”
“A little time to recover would be nice if I’m not bothering you too much.” Spiderman said, voice sounding hopeful.
“It’s fine, my mom won’t bother us as she thinks I’ve gone to bed.” I explained, placing my hands behind my back awkwardly, “Uhm, you said it takes two to three hours to heal, do you think this one will heal that fast if the wound made by the gun didn’t?”
Spiderman shrugged, and I watched as he finally took the white t-shirt I have given him in his hands, “It’ll certainly take longer than that, sometime around the early morning hours I should be fine.”
“Then stay.” I blurted out before I could actually think about what I was proposing. Spiderman froze for a second as he was about to wear the t-shirt, “I mean, you’re hurt and it’s dangerous outside, even Spiderman deserves to rest and be safe, no?”
He poked his masked head through the t-shirt, “Well, yes, but—”
“Then sleep here.” I motioned at the bed he was sitting on, “I will go to my mom and tell her I had a really bad nightmare, and that I wish to sleep next to her.”
“I don’t want to bother you, though.”
“Hey, Spidey, it’s totally cool.” I chuckled, showing him my thumbs up, “I’ll have so much fun retelling all this to Yunho, you know, my friend who’s obsessed with you. He’ll be dying that I got to patch you up and house you for a night.”
I giggled as I went to collect my phone from my desk, slipping it in my pocket. I should probably take some pyjamas with me and the medical kit as well. I walked to my closet as Spiderman watched me, and I opened the door to pick out my most favourite pyjamas to sleep in tonight. I closed the door and turned, smiling to myself…until I looked up. Until I found Spiderman gone and Yunho standing in his place. Red mask with the freaky black blinking eyes was clutched in his left hand, and his greyish-greenish-bluish hair was all messed up and dishevelled. My mouth dropped open as my pyjamas fell from my hands, and I found myself leaning back against my closet door.
“Yun—Yunho?!” I snapped; eyes wide open. This certainly must be a trick of the light or something, “There’s no fucking way you’re fucking Spiderman, Jeong Yunho!”
“But I actually am.” I watched Spiderman—no—Yunho scratch the back of his head awkwardly, averting his eyes, “This is not how I wanted to tell you.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me.” I huffed, eyebrows furrowing as I pushed myself off the closet, “It was you all along?!”
“Yeah, there’s just one Spiderman—”
“Yunho!” I hissed and walked up to him hurriedly, eyebrows furrowing, “Are you crazy?! You could’ve been so much more badly hurt! And your—your leg, you got shot yesterday, oh my God, I’m not crazy! I—I kept noticing similarities between you and Spiderman—like the constant head scratching and like—your physiques were similar—and I saw you limping this morning! I can’t believe you’re actually him, what?! And you have everyone fooled too, like—do you know Mingi is suspicious of you? I thought I was crazy for thinking you are similar to Spiderman after hanging out with Mingi, but, oh, my god, if he finds out he’ll be so mad, Yunho! And—the childhood friend—it’s Hongjoong you were talking about, isn’t it?! Oh, my God, I also told you everything about the reason why I moved here, and meanwhile I’m glad I won’t have to tell you again, I felt shitty for dumping all that on Spiderman, and it turns out it’s you—”
My eyes widened as my words got muffled, stolen away, as Yunho’s extra warm lips were pressing against mine. I froze, my whole body locking up as he leaned down even more, slotting his lips perfectly against mine. Oh, my fucking God, Yunho is kissing me?! My ultimate crush is absolutely kissing me right now?! And he also happens to be Spiderman?! What in the—I closed my eyes and pushed up on my tip toes, circling my arms around Yunho’s neck as I pulled him down closer, still careful of his wounded chest. Yunho was eager as he gently, experimentally, pressed his lips firmer against mine, his hands settling on my hips as he pulled me a little bit closer. I allowed his lips to slip between mine, gently sucking on his upper lip as I felt Yunho’s left-hand slip to the middle of my back, embracing me as he flushed me against himself. The position was a little bit uncomfortable as I had to crane my neck up and back, trying to keep my balance on my tip toes too, but it was worth it as I felt Yunho’s embrace completely engulf me, pull me into himself, wrap me up in a warm and safe cocoon. I didn’t dare breathe as our lips found a gentle and soft rhythm, Yunho, always the careful sweetheart that he is, didn’t want to hurry the kiss as he gently sucked on my lower lip, making the breath hitch in the back of my throat. I was slowly getting lightheaded, but I didn’t want to pull back just yet. Yunho, however, did slightly pull back, only to press thousands of little kisses against my lips, making me giggle quietly as his lips pulled into the widest smile I have ever seen on him.
“You’re so beautiful and cute.” I found myself whispering against his lips, eyes fluttering open. Yunho’s neck and ears were red, and I finally didn’t have to control myself as I cupped his cheeks and gently squeezed them, making him chuckle adorably, “God, I could squish your cheeks all day long. You’re so adorable.”
“You’re stealing all my lines, angel.” Well, now it was my turn to blush like crazy as I released Yunho’s cheeks and pressed my face into his neck, chuckling, “For the record, before you accuse me of it, I’m not narcissistic.”
I giggled against the hot skin of his neck, and pressed a swift kiss against the flushed flesh, he smelled like honey, “It’s quite important to be your own biggest fan, Spiderman.”
“You’ll forever tease me about it, won’t you?” Yunho asked with a chuckle as he pressed a kiss against the top of my head.
“Definitely.” I pulled back to look up at him with a grin, “But I promise to keep your secret. I’m sure Hongjoong would be more pissed than you if I said anything to anyone.”
“Oh, he definitely would be.” Yunho chuckled, and brushed a strand of hair off my forehead.
“Mingi will be really mad too once he finds out, you know.” I said with a pout, “He’s already very suspicious.”
“I know, I have noticed.” Yunho sighed as my arms slipped from his shoulders to his middle, “I plan on telling him soon, but the timing needs to be perfect.”
“Like with me?” I teased as I wriggled my eyebrows at him, and he chuckled. He draped his arms around my shoulders, and leaned down again.
“Well, I quite like the outcome of it, so I can’t complain.”
“Huh, have you been waiting long to kiss me?” It was only meant to be teasing, but the way Yunho flushed again, I knew I was right. And it made me blush too as I shook my head at him, “Well, same here, if I’m being frank. I think I’ve had a crush on you since the first day we met…”
“Well,” Yunho took a deep breath and leaned so close his warm breath hit my lips, “I know I fell in love with you the very day you moved to the city, angel. I was passing through the neighbourhood as Spiderman and saw you bringing the boxes inside while you were belting out those high notes of the song you were listening to.”
“That’s so embarrassing!” I grimaced, shaking my head at Yunho.
“No, it’s actually really adorable. You can’t fathom how often you gave me cute aggression, but I had to hold myself back.” I looked down flustered, knowing the feeling way too well.
“Well, Spiderman, it’s a pleasure to officially meet you.” I winked as I looked in Yunho’s warm chocolate brown eyes, grinning from ear to ear.
“Y/N, would you like to be Spiderman and Yunho’s girlfriend?” I chuckled, pressing a quick kiss against Yunho’s lips.
“Don’t refer to yourself in third person, it’s cringey.” I whispered, feeling just a little bit shy as I bit my bottom lip, “But yes, I would really like to be Spiderman and Yunho’s girlfriend.”
“Great, because Spiderman and Yunho also really want to be your boyfriend.” Yunho whispered back, engulfing me in a bear hug, making me feel safe, like nobody else ever has.
Bro, I can’t believe I just bagged both Spiderman and my crush in one go.
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fuckyeahgoodomens · 6 months
Text
Neil talking about the responses to Good Omens Season 2 - from the Neil Gaiman interview with Brian Levine for The Gould Standard (x,x)
BL: The audience that you have built is a very passionately engaged audience. They, frankly, they love you. And one of the reasons they love you is that you fit into what I think of as one of two great divisions in art. There's, or in writing, um, there is: I'm entertained, I'm amused. I may be even enchanted; and then there's this hits me at a visceral level. You understand me as no one else does. You have touched something very central to my experience. And it seems to me that Much of your writing, maybe all of your writing, actually reaches your audience at that latter level. You know. I would say in the former category, sort of my quintessential and beloved example would be P. G. Woodhouse. He amuses me, but I don't feel like he's revealed my inner self at a very deep level. Um, were you aware that you were going to be able to achieve that? Um, that this is something... was it a startling thing when people began coming up to you, who'd read your work and said, this means so much to me?
Neil: Yeah. It was huge. And it wasn't expected. I... if I had a mountaintop I was heading towards, it was gonna be P. G. Woodhouse. Um, I wanted to be a proficient entertainer with a clear prose style who could tell stories. Um, it probably wasn't until Sandman that I found... I started to realize that in order for a story to work, I had to show too much. In order for a story to resonate, in order for a story to matter, I had to let it matter too much. And, and I remember the first people who would start coming up to me and saying, um, you, you know, your, your Sandman comics got me through the death of a loved one. Your death character got me through my child's death, through my parent's death, through my partner's death, through my friend's death. Um, and that left me kind of amazed. I'm like, well, I didn't write it to do that. I wrote it to feed my children. I wrote it to satisfy myself. I wrote it because nobody else had ever written it. And if I didn't write it, it wouldn't be written, but I don't think I wrote it to give you what you've taken from it. And I spent really about 20, 25 years feeling awkward about that. And then my father died, in March 2009, and never got to cry about it. Never... I, you know, I've, I've got on a plane and I went to the UK and dealt with the funeral stuff and organized all of that stuff and came back and go toff the plane and went and did Stephen Colbert's Colbert Report and wearing the funeral suit because and that was all I had with me and carried on. And then, somewhere in the middle of summer, I was reading a friend's script. They'd sent me a script and said, can you look this over? And I'm reading it, and on page 20, the lead character meets somebody, and on page 26 maybe, she's dead, and I burst into tears. And I'm bawling. I am sobbing. It is coming out of me in giant racking waves. And I realized that it's everything that I'd been, hadn't let myself feel, or hadn't been able, hadn't stopped enough to let myself feel, was suddenly being given permission to feel by the death of a fictional person who I'd met six pages earlier, ia script. And I thought that... and it was huge for me, and I thought, okay, that's that thing that people are talking about sometimes, when they come tome and they say, you, you did this. So right now, I'm in this weird, wonderful place where I think a lot of people in Good Omens Season 2 thought they were signing up for the P.G. Woodhouse, and didn't know that, no, no, no, you've, you've signed up for the whole thing. You've signed up for the feelings. You've signed up for the emotions. I... it is my job to make you care and to make you feel and to feel things you haven't felt before. And which meant that the first week or so after Good Omens came out, I was getting angry, furious, deeply upset messages on every possible social medium telling me that I had betrayed people, and it was awful, and they couldn't stop crying, and why would I do that to them, and did I hate them? And they hated me. And then a weird sort of phenomenon happened as people would watch the show again. And again. And now they started to know, okay, this is where it's gonna go, this is what's gonna happen, this is how it works. And they started realizing that they were actually feeling things, and that was good. And that they were caring about two people who don't exist. You know, I made them up, and then and Terry Pratchett made them up, and then, um, David Tennant and Michael Sheen gave them life, and then they get to walk around on a screen and you know they don't exist, but you can cry for them, you can love them, they can make you laugh, they can make you exult, and most important of all, they can make you care. And the number of people who are now writing to me, saying, 'This was so important to me. This has changed my life. This makes me feel like I belong. This makes me feel like I can cope. And it's let me sort of find myself. P. S. I hope you get to do Season Three.' is, is huge.
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xanasaurusrex · 9 months
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hi, i love how you write, could you please write some clarisse x daughter of hephaestus drabble? like some love triangle kind hephaestus, aphrodite and ares, but the sapphic version with ares and hephaestus, please ♡
clarisse and hephaestus!daughter hiding their relationship clarisse la rue x hephaestus!daughter!reader a/n: hi!! thank you sm for reading my other stuff, and yes ofc! so this was originally meant to be a drabble, but as you can see from the word count i got carried away. i had an idea and then i just kept writing it, and i couldn't stop. honestly clarisse x hephaestus!daughter is a favorite pairing of mine i love ares children with hephaestus children! ok thanks sm for requesting, i hope i did your request justice! warnings: enemies to lovers, weird transition from enemies to lovers, making out, mentions of getting stabbed, mention of weapons, secret relationship wc: 2k+
a child of ares and a child of hephaestus getting together isn't impossible, and also definitely not unheard of, but it's also definitely not common.
ares kids and hephaestus kids have a sort of natural rivalry that they're sort of inducted into from the second they're claimed.
since hephaestus is married to aphrodite, and yet aphrodite is having a longstanding affair with ares, hephaestus kids tend to not trust ares kids very much.
that was how it was for clarisse and y/n for quite a while.
their relationship was as hostile as any other relationship between a hephaestus kid and an ares kid, but they just felt drawn to each other. there was just something there that they couldn't deny.
everything changed the day they first kissed. they had gotten into an argument after clarisse claimed that the armor that y/n had made for her was faulty.
y/n claimed this was 100% untrue, because she had made it herself, and she didn't half-ass armor making.
it was late in the day, early evening. y/n had finished her dinner early, since there was a sword that she had to have finished within the next two days, the production of which she was still very behind on.
clarisse had caught up with her and cornered her in the forge, and started making the angry accusations.
"the straps are loose, and the whole thing almost fell off me while i was getting stabbed at. i call that faulty, y/n," clarisse sneered.
y/n scowled at clarisse. "then you must've knocked them loose or something, because i know for a fact that i fastened on those straps myself, and they were not loose," there was a fierceness in her voice that would've made anyone else fall back, but only made clarisse get further in her face.
"they were loose, and i almost died because of it!" clarisse snapped back.
y/n rolled her eyes as she went to put her mallet back from pounding down on the metal to create the sword shape. "come on, clarisse, stop being so dramatic. you were in the sword practice area, you wouldn't have died,"
"you don't know that!"
"yes i do!"
the two paused their arguing and stared at each other. there had always been something electric between the two of them, that was something nobody was able to deny, not even the two of them.
after a few seconds of the stare down, clarisse surged forward, her feet stomping loudly on the ground of the forge as she pushed y/n up against the wall. her nostrils were flaring, and her eyes were full of fire.
and as much as she hated it, clarisse couldn't help but look down at y/n's lips.
they looked so deliciously kissable, and yet they were pulled into a sneer at clarisse. she did everything she could to banish the temptation to kiss y/n right now, because that was so not what was going to happen.
"get... off me," y/n breathed out, panting heavily. her teeth were clenched, and her eyes closed tightly, as if warding off unwelcome thoughts.
clarisse could understand the feeling.
clarisse didn't move. the two of them stayed where they were, eyes flicking between their lips and back up to the other's eyes.
eventually y/n closed her eyes again, tigher this time, saying, "clarisse, you need to get off me and leave or something is going to happen,"
clarisse stayed where she was.
the two of them continued to stare at each other for a few seconds, their breaths speeding up and hitting each other in the face, hot and harsh.
everything changed within the span of about two seconds.
surprisingly, it was y/n who surged forward first, her hands grabbing onto clarisse's face and pulling it close to hers, their lips making contact.
the second their lips touched, they both knew that their relationship would never be the same again. they weren't exactly sure how, because there was a good chance that they would just act like this never happened.
but right there, in the moment, they wanted to enjoy it as much as they could.
clarisse's hands found themselves snaking around y/n's waist, holding her tight and pulling the two of them closer together. y/n moved her hands from cradling clarisse's face to wrapping her arms around her neck.
the air in the camp forge felt hotter than y/n had ever experienced it being, and she knew it had nothing to do with the fires raging in the hearths, and much more to do with the daughter of ares, who was currently pressed up against her, kissing her with so much fervor it was making her dizzy.
they both pulled away for a millisecond with the intention of getting some air before going back in, both of them feeling hungry for the other, when of course, an interruption struck.
"y/n!" a voice called from the distance.
they both shoved away from each other dramatically, y/n accidentally banging her hip as she tried to jump backwards, unaware that she was as far back as she could go. they made eye contact for a few more seconds, staring into each other's eyes with the kind of intensity that would even make the gods quiver.
"y/n!" the voice called out again, causing y/n to avert her eyes from clarisse, being worried that if she looked at her for even a second more, she wouldn't be able to look away.
when the voice finally entered the forge, it was revealed to be one of her siblings, looking for her for advice on something to do with a weapon they made.
when y/n's brother entered the forge, he could immediately feel the tension in the space. he shrank unto himself, noticing that clarisse, the widely known volatile daughter of ares, and his older sister, who had a rather funny look on her face. come to think of it, clarisse had the same funny look on her face. like they'd been caught doing something they shouldn't have, but that couldn't be. he couldn't even fathom a thing they would be doing together that would be wrong.
he then saw clarisse's caught expression morph into one of anger. she snapped to get y/n's attention, before saying with as much conviction as she could muster, "just make sure the next armor isn't faulty. i would prefer not to die, and even if i did, i'm sure you don't want it to be your fault,"
and even though this was clarisse who was talking, there was less conviction in her voice than she had hoped. in fact, it almost sounded a little weak. like she was out of breath. which she most definitely was not. no way did a simple kiss rob her of her breath.
(it most definitely did)
y/n stumbled through walking her younger brother through what he had asked, only half focusing on his questions and giving half-thought out answers. she knew she was going to regret that when he tried to forge whatever it was he was wanting to create the next day, but at the moment, y/n couldn't find it in herself to care.
she had just kissed clarisse la rue, and she was sure it had been the best kiss of her life. granted, there hadn't been many, but she couldn't imagine another kiss topping the one she had just experienced.
there was only one problem.
the best kiss of her life had been with... who it had been with.
the next week was particularly awkward between the two. the usual animosity that had come to be expected at camp half blood between an ares child and a hephaestus child was absent between the two, and instead they avoided each other at all costs.
y/n spent most of her time in the forge, crafting anything but the specific style of armor that she knew clarisse favored, and instead found herself self-consciously forging beautiful spears that, despite the expert craftsmanship, she knew would never rival the spear that clarisse's father had given her.
her siblings were becoming increasingly worried about her, since she hardly ever left the forge. when she did, she seemed preoccupied, and irritated about something. they had asked what was going on, but she had refused to disclose anything.
similarly, clarisse was doing everything she could to keep y/n out of her head as well.
she hardly ever left the training fields. she was singing dummies with her magical spear left and right, day and night. specifically the first day after the kiss, people would see clarisse violently taking down whole fleets of dummies within seconds, and were hesitant to train that particular day.
clarisse took more breaks than y/n did, mostly because she wasn't able to spend every waking moment at the training areas, partially because her body wouldn't allow it, and also the harpies that patrolled the camp at night weren't particularly fond of it. if clarisse had the energy to fight them off, she might've attempted it, but considering she spent most of her days training her body in an attempt to train her mind away from thinking about y/n, all that she could really do was sleep.
over time, though, the two of them were forced together in certain situations.
since they were both the heads of their respective cabins, whenever the counselors of each cabin were needed, they needed to be in the same room, and they had to be accustomed to that.
they were also shoved together quite a lot when their campers got into tousles, which happened quite often considering the animosity that was practically drilled into their heads from the second they were claimed and put in their right cabins.
to say that their relationship was complicated would be a gross understatement.
there was something that drew the two together, often finding themselves in situations that could rarely be explained.
like the time about a month after the forge incident (that neither of them had told anyone about) when they both went to the bathroom at the same time unknowingly, and found themselves mere centimeters from each other.
"do you ever think about it?" clarisse asked. it occurred to her that she had no memory of getting this close to y/n, but she wasn't really complaining.
before the kiss they at least interacted. it was mostly negative, with the two yelling at each other or complaining about the other for whatever reason, but they were near each other quite often due to this. after the kiss, and after the two started avoiding each other like a damn hellhound, that clarisse was really missing her company.
she was starting to think that maybe she had only ever bickered with y/n to get the scraps of her attention that she was desperate for.
there were times when this sounded like a completely logical explanation, and there were also times when clarisse had this thought and she forced herself to banish it, telling herself that she didn't need y/n's attention. why would she? they had never been friends, had never even really been acquaintances.
and yet, throughout a lot of clarisse's life, y/n had been one of the only constants.
the first day clarisse showed up at camp half blood, she was there, welcoming her. though clarisse had been rather hostile to her that day, which now that she thinks about it, may have been what caused their more intense rivalry, y/n still insisted on showing her around the camp, showing her all of her personal favorite spots.
"think about what?" the sound of y/n's voice broke clarisse from her trance, and brought her back to the present.
clarisse blinked once, and then y/n was in focus again. clarisse sharply inhaled at really seeing y/n up close, seeing all the intricate details of her face.
she was sure she had never seen anything so beautiful.
"the kiss," clarisse clarified. her fingers, as if with a mind of their own, began seeking out y/n's fingers. "because i do," she murmured. the tips of their pointer fingers touched, and it was as if electricity zinged up their spines. "i don't really want to," clarisse admitted, her head turning to the side as she did everything she could to avoid looking y/n in the eyes. "but i do. i can't help it."
y/n cleared her throat, utterly shocked at clarisse's admission "sometimes... sometimes i think about it, too," she confessed. "o-occasionally,"
the two were silent for a few seconds, before clarisse finally gathered up the courage to look y/n in the eye again. the eye contact was searing, and intense, and before they knew it, the two were leaning closer to each other.
there was no denying it anymore, since they had both admitted it.
they didn't know what happened, when it happened, or even why it happened, but there was something between them. something that was magnetic and uncontrollable... and somewhat addicting.
they were milliseconds away from kissing. their lips were just barely grazing, when the sound of voices startled the two apart.
as electric as the two of them felt around each other, they both knew that this was the sort of situation they didn't want to be caught in.
this need to not be caught like this was only furthered when it was a group of aphrodite girls that walked into the bathroom, looking at the two of them curiously, instantly clocking how close the two were standing. they obviously noted the taut tension in the room, and clarisse and y/n watched as the girls' eyes flitted between the two of them, their previous conversation having come to a halt.
clarisse, so fast y/n wasn't sure she hadn't just disappeared into thin air, turned around and slammed the stall door behind her, locking it with a heavy click.
y/n was left there with a shocked expression on her face, staring at the aphrodite girls, looking a lot like a deer caught in headlights.
she hesitated for only a second more before pushing past them and leaving the bathroom all together. she felt slightly guilty about leaving clarisse in there, but she was the one who had abandoned her first, so she didn't feel too bad about it.
after this, everything changed for clarisse and y/n.
they started meeting up in secret to spend time with each other away from camp. this spending time with each other consisted of talking together, laughing together, and yes... kissing.
it took a while for them to become official, but when they did, they both found themselves happier than they had been in a while.
it was noticeable, too. almost everyone at camp, chiron and mr. d included, that the two were acting... happier.
there was just something in the air around the two of them. whenever they were close to each other, it felt like the air became electric. no one could really place what was happening, since y/n. and clarisse had decided to keep their relationship a secret... at least for the start.
it was a complicated decision they made. people often forget that camp half blood is a large collection of teenagers. and teenagers like to gossip.
it's not exactly uncommon for two demigods to get together, and then everyone has something to say about it, which puts a strain on the new relationship.
it was y/n who suggested the idea.
"i just think... i want to enjoy this," she said while twirling a strand of clarisse's hair around her finger. she adjusted herself where her back was leaned against the rough bark of the tree in the woods at camp. clarisse was laying down as well, with her head in y/n's lap. "i mean, you've seen what happens. everybody has their own opinion, and then they get into fights and then they break up," y/n took a deep breath. "i really don't want that to happen to us,"
clarisse was quiet for a minute, her eyes flitting around at the trees and leaves and branches above her head. "okay," she said. "i don't want that to happen to us either. i want to enjoy us," she said.
y/n smiled, leaning down to give her a kiss on the forehead. she started to lean back up, but clarisse kept hold of her cheeks and pulled her down for a kiss on the lips. they both smiled into it, giggling slightly, enjoying being the teenage girls that they are.
so there they sat, enjoying each other's presence. enjoying being in love, although they hadn't said those three large words quite yet, but they would before long.
because the gods knew that these two were hopelessly in love with each other, and were going to be together for quite a while.
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ceilidho · 2 months
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This is in no way of hating but i want to know why do you enjoy writing noncon/rape? When I first downloaded tumblr which was couple of months ago i was surprised by the amount of noncon fics here. I eventually came to enjoy them which makes me question myself. Whenever i read a noncon fic and enjoy it i feel like im betraying women who actually went through those traumatic events. Plus I actually don't really like dark romance books? I love cod dead dove and that is mainly because i really love the characters and the authors are so talented. I rambled so much and i hope you don't get this in the wrong way i don't mean to hate AT ALL i love the stuff you write. Maybe i shouldn't think too much and let myself enjoy what im reading lol
first of all, no worries! i wasn't sure about your tone/intentions at first, but by the end i was totally fine with the question.
i actually don't mind talking about this stuff - i just sometimes avoid it on main because i prefer chatting about it privately.
second, i'm no psychologist or sociologist, so i probably won't be able to give you the most satisfactory answer, but i think there are a lot of different reasons. i can only name a few. one thing i should mention right off the bat is that rape fantasies are very normal (and this is true whether you're a survivor of SA or not) and writing/reading fiction can be a safe way to process those thoughts/feelings.
one of prevailing reasons is, of course, that many survivors of SA use noncon/dubcon literature/art as a way of processing their experiences and taking ownership of their trauma.
and look, people are going to go back and forth on this point (i've seen it all before - many people refuse to believe that engaging with noncon lit/art is helpful, and in fairness, it's NOT helpful for everyone because every person is different), but at the end of the day, if a survivor tells you "writing/reading this was helpful in my recovery" then that's that!
additionally, for many women and non-binary folk (i can only speak as a cis woman, but i'm sure this is a shared lived experience across many different people), we're also taught from a very young age to suppress our sexual desires / that being open about our sexuality is morally reprehensible and shameful. and a lot of people carry that shame for years, impacting them well into adulthood. so dubcon/noncon fantasies can be a way of being able to enjoy sexual scenarios where you don't have to be the initiator, thus taking away some of the emotional weight and shame.
plus, at the end of the day (and im sure many people will disagree with this take, it's something that i'm still figuring out myself), there is a kind of weird underlying consent implicit in dark fics. like, you might be reading a fic or novel that's ostensibly noncon, but you're also actively seeking out that literature (hopefully it's not just sprung on you - i do very much agree with tagging to the fullest extent and my lukewarm take is that I think all books, even traditionally published ones, should come with content/trigger warnings too).
there are a medley of reasons why someone might write or read dark fiction/dark romance. again, i'm just one person and i can only speak from my own experience!
i think at the end of the day, the important thing to realize is that fiction is fake, and as long as the writer appropriately tags their work and ensures that the audience is aware of what they're getting into when they start reading, they're not coercing the reader into something they aren't prepared for.
and it's totally fine if you have limits (like, you can read and enjoy dubcon, but not noncon) or can't engage with the material at all, but it's also unfair to say that it reflects someone's real life values - the same way that we don't say that the people who enjoy crime fiction must love murder.
and the last thing i want to say because this got a bit out of hand lol, is that, yes, for some people dark fiction is genuinely harmful, whether or not they're a survivor. it's not for everyone and that's completely fine and i'm aware of that, which is why i agree that you should tag as much as possible (even if you feel like you're overdoing it sometimes), but someone else's discomfort doesn't give them the right to tell you how to process your own emotions/experiences/desires/etc.
as long as no one's getting hurt, there's no issue as far as i'm concerned. and sorry but, no one's getting hurt by reading a fic or a novel unless the author didn't give proper content warnings - if you "forgot" to read the tags or read anyway DESPITE being warned, im sorry but that's life.
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𝒫𝒶𝓇𝒶𝓁𝓁ℯ𝓁 𝒫ℯ𝓇𝒸ℯ𝓅𝓉𝒾ℴ𝓃𝓈
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Here we finally have my janny x reader request that has morphed into this massive… thing (and yes I did not have a name for it until yesterday 😅). I tried to make Jake as subby as possible but he ended up just turning out to be a sweet little bean. Sorry if the ending seems rushed, I was kicking myself to wrap this up so I can post and you know I’m bad at endings. Please read all the warnings because there’s a lot going on here…
Pairings: Jake Kiszka X Danny Wagner X plus size fem!reader *includes slash
Warnings: 18+ only! Not for the faint of heart! Lots of adult content including: some angst, some jealousy, drinking and smoking, body insecurity, lots and lots of smut including: oral m&f receiving, fingering m&f receiving, squirting, some protected and unprotected sex, anal rimming, cum swapping, double penetration, threesome, college AU
Word count: 12k!
“So, what are you going to do?” You asked as you laid on your back sideways on top of the neatly made bed with your long hair hanging over the edge of the tiny mattress. You’d never met a boy who liked to make their bed, especially not a college boy, but Jake had always been the meticulous type. Even his textbooks were in a tidy row across the desk he sat at now as he tried to focus on his homework and talk to you at the same time.
“I don’t know, we can always just go together. Everyone already thinks we’re dating anyways” he replied without looking up from his page, like he hadn’t given it enough thought to be concerned at all.
“Maybe that’s why you can’t get a date,” you offered with a click of your tongue. “Am I cock blocking you Jakey?”
“I assure you, that you are not” he finally let his eyes flicker over to you, giving you a pointed look that you knew after all the years being best friends meant please change the subject.
You ignored him, as did a best friend, and continued on as you stared up at his ceiling. “I don’t know why you want to go to this stupid frat party anyways, you hate jocks”.
“I don’t want to go to this party” he corrected you after scribbling something into his notebook. “Josh wants me to. And besides they’re not all jocks, some of them are pretty cool guys”.
“Right…” you trailed off for a bit. Of course it was Josh’s doing to have Jake at this party, it was his own fraternity anyways.
“That’s why you should come too. Maybe you will meet someone there” he offered.
“Meet someone?” You scorned the idea. “At a couples party at a fraternity? What’s the deal with that anyways?”
“I don’t know, it is kind of weird” he shrugged, “I already told Josh I’m not finding a date so if he wants me to come then he can figure it out”.
“I think you should try to find someone. I haven’t seen you date anyone since Meghan broke up with you last fall semester. But to be honest that’s what you get for dating a girl named Meghan”.
Jake sighed, admitting defeat and putting his pencil down so he could turn in his chair and face you. “I’m not looking for a date”.
You quirked a brow at him, seeing him upside down from where you laid. “Why are you so against it? There’s really no one you’re interested in?”
Even from this angle, you could read Jake’s face easy as he read those complicated biology textbooks. “Wait! You are interested in someone aren’t you!”
“Will you leave it alone already?” He groaned, “and get your feet off of my wall, you’re going to leave dirty foot marks all over it”.
You grabbed one of your legs that had been propped up against the Sheetrock and looked at the sole of your foot. “They’re not dirty. Come have a look and tell me who it is you’re crushing after. I can’t believe you’ve been holding out on me”.
Jake did join you on the bed, but only so he could wrestle your legs down which ultimately ended up in you with your head facing the end of the bed now and Jake on top ticking you into submission. You used to hate being tickled, didn’t like the feeling of others touching you around your midsection like that, but after so many years of being close with Jake it didn’t bother you to be a little more physically intimate with him.
That's why you’d ultimately asked him to be your first. It was the summer before you both joined college, neither of you had been with anyone before and it felt like the time was right to make that step with someone you trusted. Jake had always been there for you, and you him, and losing your virginity together had meant the world to you even though you both agreed to just stay friends.
Since then you’d slept together once more, at the first college party you went to, both getting drunk off your asses and falling into bed together in a fit of giggles. There wasn’t anyone you trusted more than Jake, and you hoped he felt the same way about you, which is why you wanted to know his secret.
“Are you going to tell me who it is or not?” You pushed at his shoulders, though not very hard because you actually didn’t really mind him being close. “Why can’t you just invite them to the party?”
“Because they’re already going to be there” Jake let slip, though he quickly tried to cover it up by tickling you again.
Just when you were sure you were about to knee him in the side if he didn’t stop, a quick light knock came at his bedroom door followed by the sound of it opening.
“Hey Jake-” Danny was abruptly cut off as he accidentally walked in on Jake scrambling to get off of you, both of you looking disheveled even though you were completely innocent.
You quickly pulled your shirt down from where it had risen up as Jake’s fingers poked and teased, hiding your stomach before Danny could get a look.
“Sorry” Danny quickly tried to turn around and leave but Jake jumped from the bed and grabbed his arm.
“No no it’s alright” Danny turned back around and you sat up as you watched Jake fix his hair back into place. “What’s up?”
“I was just going to ask if you could give me a ride to the party tomorrow night. I’ve got a study group in the afternoon and Josh will already be at the house setting up”.
“Yeah, of course” Jake easily agreed without a second’s hesitation.
You looked up at the two of them, debating on whether you should stay out of it, but ultimately decided being mean today was more fun. “You know, Jake hasn’t even gotten a date for that party yet”.
“Shut up! Yes I have!” He lied as he glanced over his shoulder at you, his face turning beat red.
“Oh, don’t worry about it” Danny replied, “I’m just taking a girl from my study group. She’s gonna meet me there. A lot of the guys are just bringing random girls as dates anyways”.
“Hmm, why make it a couples party at all then?” You questioned. Since Danny was in the fraternity too, you figured he would have more of an idea, but he just shrugged.
“Don’t know, I just show up when and where I’m supposed to be at this point”.
“So, meet here at 8 then?” Jake butt back in, not trying to hurry Danny out of his room, but also not wanting you to spill any more of his information.
“Sounds great” Danny nodded and when he left the room Jake exhaled slowly. When he shut the door again you could see the light blush that filled his cheeks, and he fidgeted with his hands as he paced across his room in a way you’d only seen him do a few times before, when he was really nervous.
You looked back at the closed door, then back at the state of your friend, and started to put two and two together. “Oh my god” you muttered, breaking him from his trance as his eyes flicked over to you. “It’s Danny isn’t it? You like Danny?”
“Shush!” He ran back over to the bed, worried that if the man in question was still in the hallway he’d hear you.
“Why didn’t you tell me!” You whispered harshly, grabbing his hands and pulling him back into the bed next to you.
“It just happened” he tried to explain, but you knew better. Jake didn’t get this way about someone overnight. “I mean I’ve always liked him obviously, but before he was just my kid brother’s friend, but here recently I don’t know…”
He trailed off, like he didn’t know how to explain the feelings that had been mixing together in his mind. “I get it” you spoke for him, “Danny’s hot. He’s always been a nice guy, and a great friend to Sam, but we’ve grown up now and he has too”.
He agreed it made sense. You had all found yourselves in college, Jake had discovered his love for marine biology and was studying to get into a program for next summer. Josh, well Josh had always been a theater kid, but in high school it was more of a clique, in college he could take it seriously.
You had bloomed in your years here, coming out of your shell as the quirky shy girl that hung around boys because you didn’t feel like you fit in with the teenage girls who cared more about hair and nails than the books or other ‘nerdy’ things you found interesting.
It wasn’t like you didn’t crave that sisterhood the girls in your year had. You liked makeup and dressing up, but even then looking at the other girl’s, thinner, with smoother hair and more expensive clothes, you never felt their equal. Being around society’s definition of pretty had made you doubt your own beauty, but having moved away from your small hometown and met so many more people, expanded your horizons a little, you were able to take a step back and realize that you were your own definition of pretty and that was truly all that mattered.
“Well,” you pulled his hand into your lap, giving it a light squeeze, “what can I do to help?”
One thing you didn’t tell Jake was that you too had a bit of a crush on Danny. You understood what Jake meant by always liking him. Since you grew up being best friends with Jake, and Danny grew up being best friends with his brother, your paths were always crossing.
From a young age you felt butterflies in your stomach when he was in the same room, lost your words when he’d talk one on one with you, even daydreamed a time or two about what it would be like to confess your feelings, but you were sure he didn’t like you that way. You had never bothered Jake with telling him about your crush either, because you felt like it would never happen. Especially now, Danny seemed out of your league. So you pushed your own heart aside for Jake, and hatched a plan to bring the two of them together.
“Hey! You’re coming too?” Danny asked when the three of you all prepared to load up into Jake’s car with the extra keg Josh had text him last minute to bring.
“Yeah, I’m his date” you made air quotation marks with your hands making Jake roll his eyes as he tried and failed to load the keg into the trunk.
“Let me help you with that” Danny came behind Jake, placing one of his hands on top of Jake’s and the other a little spaced apart so they could lift it up.
“Great team work guys!” You called from behind, giving two thumbs up and an awkward smile. Your hands fell back to your sides when they both stared blankly at you, your palms clapping against the tight black jeans covering your thighs. “Right, well I’ll take the backseat, Danny you got shotgun”.
“Oh no that’s alright! You sit up front with Jake” Danny tried to argue, but you were already popping open the door and climbing inside.
Sliding into the middle seat, you leaned over the center console. “Your hair has gotten long Danny”.
“You think?” He chuckled as you played with a ringlet that sat at shoulder length.
“Yeah, Jake was just telling me that he really likes the way you’re doing it now. That must be a tedious routine”.
Danny glanced over at Jake, who kept his eyes trained on the road for more than one reason. “I can umm, give you some pointers if you want?”
Jake’s shoulders dropped and his grip on the steering wheel tightened. Of course Danny didn’t mean to insinuate that Jake needed some pointers. He just wanted to be nice and he had learned a thing or two about hair care.
“Is Sam coming to this party?” You questioned next, trying to keep the short drive over to campus filled with conversation.
“No, he’s got a shift he couldn’t get out of. Plus he didn’t really want to come anyways”. Danny answered.
That’s good, you thought to yourself. So you wouldn’t have to deal with trying to steal Danny away from Sam, just whoever this girl he had invited as his date. Shouldn’t be too hard.
When you arrived Jake and Danny carried the keg inside. You were a little late since Danny’s study session had gone longer than he expected, but neither you or Jake minded since most of the party was already a few drinks in and having a good time. Which meant less awkward social interactions if everyone was already a little tipsy.
“M’lady” Danny offered you the first plastic cup that was filled with beer once the keg had been successfully tapped, something you were surprised you enjoyed watching since Danny was actually really good at it.
Sometimes you forgot Danny was in the same fraternity as Josh was, just because he seemed a little more down to earth and easygoing than what you pictured a frat guy being, but seeing him like this, bag pulled backwards over his dark curls and making himself right at home, was really putting it into perspective for you.
Danny started to pour another drink for Jake next, but you quickly snatched that cup from his hands too. “Nope, I’m driving back so these are my only drinks, but I see shots over there for you two”.
Danny followed your line of sight through the kitchen to the opening for the dining room where a rowdy bunch were lining up little clear plastic shot glasses and pouring them full with a variety of bottles scattered all over the table.
Once the group had taken their shots, they cleared the room and you stepped up next, placing your beers onto the table to free your hands. “Alright, pick your poison!”
You shuffled around the bottles, the light plinking sound of glass filling the room as you tried to remember any of the fancy shots you’d learned to make the summer you turned twenty-one, bar-backing at a restaurant with a few of the girls you’d met at the university. “Unless you’d rather have what Jake’s having?”
“Oh? You know what Jake likes?” Danny moved aside and let you continue your search just as your eye caught the perfect bottle.
The man in question was waiting against the wall, arms crossed over his chest and an amused smirk on his face. Despite the small hick up in the car he was enjoying watching you attempt to get Danny worked up- and if he had already had something to drink then maybe he wouldn’t feel so guilty about staring at your ass as you leaned over the edge of the table to reach the large skinny bottle all the way in the back.
“Yep, Jake likes it tall,” you lined up two of the little plastic glasses right next to each other and started to pour the clear liquid in both, all the way to the very top as you continued to speak, “smooth”, you only spilled the tiniest amount when switching over to the next one, “and sexy”.
Danny raised a brow as he took his shot from the table, careful not to make a mess though it was nearly impossible with how close to the lip the fill was. Jake pushed off the wall and moved between you and Danny, taking his own.
“Cheers” you retrieved one of your cups and held it up. The two boys mirrored your movement then both turned to each other as they knocked the alcohol back. You tilted your cup to your lips too, chugging the rest of the beer down in one go.
“Tequila?” Danny pointed to the bottle you had poured from, still tasting the burn on his tongue. “I thought you liked bourbon?”
“Don’t tell me she knows me better than you do” Jake taunted. He picked up the tequila and filled both of their glasses up again, not quite to the top this time. “Bourbon is for when you’re being a gentleman. Tequila is for when you’re up to no good”.
Danny took his second shot and wiped his mouth dry with the back of his hand. He didn’t often take two shots back to back, but it was a party and he was with friends, so he figured it wouldn’t hurt to have a little extra this time.
“Come on” you playfully grabbed Danny’s hand and started to pull him towards the sound of the rest of the party. “Let’s see how long we can keep you from your date”.
A good half an hour passed and you were nearly done with your last cup of beer before the three of you were ever interrupted. Josh stole Jake away first, and then Danny’s date finally seemed to care that he was here now that it was just the two of you standing around and chatting.
He had pointed her out nearly as soon as you arrived. She was a gorgeous girl with fair skin, dark auburn hair pulled into a tidy high ponytail, and she was wearing a tight dress that showed off her slender frame. Up until now she had been socializing with a group of guys from the fraternity, no doubt thriving on all the attention they gave her, but currently she was approaching Danny with a deceitful smile like she hadn’t just been ignoring him.
“Hey, glad you could make it” he greeted her as well as introducing you as one of his close friends.
“Nice to meet you” she turned her smile to you and you nod your head slightly with a strained “yeah, you too”.
You weren’t trying to be bitchy to her, but it was hard to not lose a little self confidence when standing next to someone who seemed so perfect in comparison, and that it pissed you off. Danny mentioned that she looked good and she played it off with a giggle, agreeing that he usually only saw her in sweats at study group, not dressed up like this. They looked like they would make a good couple, and it worried you that maybe Danny’s attention might’ve been caught elsewhere before you could help Jake make his move.
“So who was that guy standing with you earlier?” She asked Danny. So she had noticed them earlier.
“Jake?” Danny replied in question, unless she was talking about Josh for the brief moment he was there Jake had to be the one she was referring to.
“Is he part of the fraternity?” She glanced around the room, searching through the faces of party goers but coming up empty.
“No, his brother Josh is though. They’re around here somewhere”.
“Do you think you could introduce me? He’s really cute”.
Now you had every right to be possessive over Jake, even if you weren’t dating, and your anger flared up at her bold request. She was supposed to be Danny’s date and here she was asking him to introduce her to another guy?
Before you could open your mouth to say something to her that you would probably regret, Danny calmly and politely declined with a curt “he’s not available”.
It was curious to you that he’d chosen that excuse. Danny was close to Jake, he knew Jake was single, but it sounded like he didn’t want her making a move on him just as much as you didn’t.
“Oh” she sounded a little taken back by his short answer, like maybe she wasn’t accustomed to being rejected, but quickly pulled her smile back on and continued talking with Danny like it hadn’t even happened.
With your beer now gone and your nerves already shot, you leaned over to Danny. “I’m going to go find a bathroom, do you know where I can find one more private?”
“Yeah, just around the corner there” he nodded towards the opposite end of the packed living room, “take the stairs, if anyone tries to stop you just say I sent you up”.
“Thanks”. You slipped away, checking to make sure Danny was still talking to his date and not watching you make a wrong turn to go and find Jake.
When you found Jake you quickly grabbed his hand and pulled him away from his chatty other half. Though he was glad you’d come to save him, he warily asked where you were going as he followed you up the stairs. You got some funny looks from the few who did see the two of you sneaking off, but thankfully no one tried to stop you.
“I’m going to talk to Danny. Get a feel of the situation” you explained as you found an empty room you could set them up in. “Give me like fifteen minutes then head back up here, okay?”
“I don’t know…” he began, looking around the random room. It was just an additional sitting area, smaller than the living room downstairs, with a few lounge chairs and a collection of gaming consoles hooked up to the obnoxiously large flatscreen. Exactly what you’d expect in a house where a bunch of college guys lived.
“Trust me?” You asked.
Jake faced you again, and nodded his head. “Yeah, I trust you”.
“Great!” You leaned over and placed a quick kiss to his cheek. “Hopefully the next time we’re in here someone will be getting kissed on the lips”.
Jake smiled and shook his head before going off to find somewhere to entertain himself during the wait.
“Danny, can I talk to you for a sec?” you leaned against the bannister of the staircase as he walked by, two drinks in hand. One for himself, and the other you assumed was for his date.
“Sure” he easily agreed, and handed one of the drinks off to a random stranger before following you back up the stairs.
You hoped this would be the last time you’d have to climb these damn stairs as you led him to the room you’d decided on earlier. “I wanted to ask you something”. Though you were unfamiliar with the house, only having just found this room earlier, Danny was well accustomed to roaming around here and knew exactly where you were heading.
“I wanted to ask you something too” he revealed, moving to set his drink down on the ledge of a fireplace inside.
“Oh,” you stood your ground as he approached you, and for some reason your heart started to beat wildly in your chest. It was dark in the room, neither having bothered to find a light switch, but the large open windows let enough moonlight in that he was completely visible. He was cast in an ethereal blue glow just like how you’d imagined him sometimes in your daydreams. “You go first”. You pushed, trying to sort out your thoughts and focus on why you were here in the first place, for Jake.
“I’ve been picking up some… signals tonight, I wanted to make sure I wasn’t just reading into things”.
So your plan had been working, you let a smile slip. “No, no, you’re right we have been trying to get your attention”.
“If it’s my attention you want, you have it” he continued, coming to stand right in front of you.
“Well,” you nibbled on your lip, somehow nervous when before you’d been nothing but confident. “Someone likes you, and I wanted to see how you felt about it first”.
“Someone likes me?” He raised his brows with a light taunting chuckle, “and who would that be?”
Before you could answer him, clarify that it was Jake that you had brought him here for, Danny bridged the gap between you, letting one hand rest on your hip and the other cupping your face as he pulled you into a kiss.
You didn’t let your eyes close, and though every fiber in your body screamed at you to kiss him back, you were still as a statue. Danny pulled away and searched your expression for an answer to your hesitancy, and behind him you saw something that made your heart drop into your stomach. Jake had come just like you’d asked, and he’d seen Danny kiss you.
When Jake saw that you had noticed him, he quickly turned and fled, falling back into the dark before you had the chance to say something other than “Jake!”
“What’s wrong?” Danny asked, concerned that the bewildered look on your face was his fault for moving too quickly.
“I’m sorry,” you instantly apologized, though you really hadn’t done anything wrong on purpose, a reflex that still clung to you after years of feeling insignificant. “This is wrong Danny, I can’t”.
You tried to escape, run after Jake and plead for him to forgive you, but Danny caught your arm. “Wait! I don’t understand. I thought you said you liked me?” He was more confused than ever, not having seen Jake, though by your call of his name he gathered he had something to do with it. “Are you and Jake together?”
Your brows furrowed in frustration. You didn’t want to lie to Danny, but you didn’t want to betray your best friend's trust, and the truth seemed more complicated now than it ever had been before. “No, we’re not together. Not right now at least. It’s just Jake, he’s the one that likes you. I brought you up here to meet him”.
“Oh…” Danny’s hand that lingered on your arm dropped to his side as he tried to process the information you’d given him. One question still remained at the front of his mind though. “So you don’t like me then?”
“I-” your throat clenched before you could form the words you knew you needed to say. You needed to tell him no, you didn’t like him for the sake of your friendship, but instead what came out was. “I do, Danny”.
“I can’t though,” you quickly continued, trying to make up for confessing with rationalization. “Jake means the world to me, I could never do anything to hurt him. So I need to find him, please, I need to tell him this was all just some huge misunderstanding”.
“I don’t want it to be a misunderstanding though” Danny pleaded. “I like Jake” he wasn’t afraid to tell you that, and honestly if Jake had still been here right now he’d tell him too. “But I like you too. I just never said anything because I thought you were with him. I mean even if you guys say you’re not together, everyone can see the chemistry there”.
“What are you saying Danny?”
“I’m saying I like both of you” he couldn’t help the anxious huff and smile as he admit what he’d held a secret for so long. “I’ve thought about being with both of you before, I just didn’t know either of you were into me like that”.
“With both of us?” Your voice came out in a doubtful tone, though the idea was already causing butterflies in the pit of your stomach.
“Is that okay? To like both of you?” He sounded apprehensive of himself now, his shoulders slumping like he was shrinking in on himself.
“I-” you stumbled over your words again, feeling your face flush when you really allowed yourself to think about it. “Yes, that’s okay with me, but Jake…” you were afraid to agree to it now. Though you claimed to know Jake better than anyone else, except maybe his own twin, you didn’t want to speak for him on this matter. Especially not after you’d just seemingly broken his trust.
“I know” Danny wrapped his arms around your shoulders and pulled you into a tight, all encompassing hug. “Let’s go find him and clear this up”.
The two of you found Jake outside, sitting on a bench with Josh who was the only one to regard your presence when you joined them on the patio. Jake had a joint perched between his fingers, the cherry lighting up as he took a drag and exhaled slowly.
“I’m going to go back inside, it’s a little chilly out here” Josh mentioned as he stood and nodded in your direction before turning back to his brother. “If you need anything just let me know okay?”
Jake was silent, taking another inhale then letting his hand settle against the armrest so the ashes would fall to the ground instead of in his lap.
“What did he tell you?” You whispered as Josh passed by.
“Nothing. He just pulled me out here and demanded I light one up for him. He’s lucky I was saving that one for after the party”.
“He’s going to be alright” Danny assured him, and Josh left you to work it out amongst yourselves.
Danny moved to take Josh’s place next to Jake on the bench, but between the two of them there wasn’t much room left to sit. You stayed off to the side, mostly keeping your distance in case Jake really was as upset with you as you knew you deserved to be.
“Hey there Jake” Danny began softly, trying to win him over with honey before jumping into the explanation for what he’d seen upstairs. “Can we talk?”
“Bout what?” Jake nearly croaked out, his voice half shot from the smoke, but you could tell it was also because he was holding back his emotions.
Your eyes prickled for him, but you dried them quickly with your hand. He hadn’t yelled at you yet, cursed the both of you and ran you off the patio, so there was hope yet he’d hear you out. No doubt the accompaniment of the weed was helping keep him calm.
Danny took his hat off and placed it on his knee, running his fingers through the tangles at the crown of his head a few times before leaning back on the bench. “Remember that summer when we all went to the beach? We rented this huge house with like six rooms. Sam brought this girl he’d only been seeing for like two weeks and it pissed everyone off because it was just supposed to be a family trip”.
Your heart went sore as you easily remembered the trip Danny was referring to, having been so excited to be invited and considered a part of the family just like Danny was. It was a short vacation over the Labor Day weekend which meant the beach was so busy, but that didn’t stop you from having the best time of your life.
“She ended up being a really nice girl” Jake mentioned, “Sam’s an idiot for letting that one go”.
“I agree with you there” Danny chuckled, not in too much of a hurry to get to the point of bringing up this story. “You two were inseparable that weekend” he glanced over at you, trying to encourage you to come closer. You did, inching forwards until Jake’s eyes flickered over and you halted like a deer ready to run from a sniper in the woods and his piercing gaze.
It felt like so long ago, even though in the grand scheme of your relationship over the years not much time had really passed between then and now. You weren’t sure how much everyone knew about you and Jake around that time, didn’t really care about what details he did or didn’t get into with his brothers, but the night before leaving was the party you had both gotten really drunk at and slept together for the second and last time. In the morning you were so terrified Jake would put some distance between you, even debated not taking the trip with them all together so he wouldn’t have to feel awkward about what had happened, but Jake clung to you the entire time.
That weekend was probably the closest you and Jake had ever come to being a legitimate couple. Every chance you got he was at your side, holding your hand, even giving you good night kisses. And yet when you got back home, back to school and work and reality, things just went back to normal.
“I remember one night, after spending all day at the beach Sam and Josh went to bed early but we stayed up to watch a movie together. You fell asleep first and I tried to get her to bed, but she wouldn’t leave you alone. So I got your blanket from your bed and she cuddled up next to you on the couch”.
Though Jake wasn’t speaking much, his face showed that he remembered the night. He remembered waking up early in the morning with you underneath his arm on the couch, not knowing how either of you had ended up that way and with a blanket too. Now he knew he had Danny to thank for that.
“I went to bed so envious that night. I mean I have Sam, and I’ve dated my fair share, but I don’t think I’ve ever come close to having what you two have”.
Jake let his eyes finally meet yours now, and he could tell you were still on the brink of tears. His brows furrowed, he didn’t want to see you upset but he was still a little hurt, and waiting for Danny to get to the part where he would be telling him he wanted you for himself. That’s what made this so difficult, because not only was his crush being taken away but he felt like he was going to lose you too.
“So tonight,” Danny continued and Jake took one last hit off his joint in preparation, “I know there might’ve been some misunderstandings, and I just want to clear the air. I don’t know what I can offer that you don’t already have, but I’d very much like to, if there’s room for me, stay with both of you”.
“With her?” Jake asked, trying to clarify what he thought Danny meant.
“With her,” Danny repeated, but took Jake’s free hand in his own, “and you”.
Danny didn’t want to make it sound like the two of you had decided this without him, you both wanted Jake to come to a conclusion on his own, hoping on bated breath that he would agree as well.
He thought about it for a moment, honestly not having even considered this was an option when he’d seen the kiss upstairs. He automatically assumed Danny wasn’t into him that way, and there was still a part of him that doubted whether Danny was doing this truly to be with him too or if it was just a ploy to get to you. Danny had never been the deceitful type though, so he chose to believe he really did want this, and Jake wanted it too.
Even though it had been so long since there had been sexual intimacy between you two, Jake never stopped wanting you. It was hard sometimes when you came over and laid on his bed like it was your own, let your guard down and made yourself comfortable and easy for the taking. All he’d have to do would be to crawl into bed with you and he knew things would easily progress from there, but you had never expressed any real desire to be anything more than friends. So held himself back, looked for reprieve in others like Meghan, but no one ever compared. Until the crush on Danny developed.
“I think…” he trailed off for a moment as he turned his hand over in Danny’s and laced their fingers together. “I’d like that too”.
Danny let out a relieved laugh, so glad his little story time actually worked because he’d had no back up plan other than to both beg him for forgiveness. “Thank fucking god. Can I kiss you too then?” He thought it would be a good thing to ask this time, just so he didn’t put anyone in a bad spot again.
Jake glanced back over at you, and you couldn’t contain the smile that came when you nodded your head. He turned back around and Danny was already pressing their lips together. At first you felt out of place watching them share this intimate moment, their first kiss, but soon Danny was breaking away and asking you to come closer again.
Jake stood first, taking your hands and leading them to wrap your arms around his neck. “Are you sure you’re okay with this?”
You answered him with your own kiss, tasting the remnants of weed on his mouth and feeling your head spin like he was your high. Danny waited patiently for Jake to finish kissing you back before he joined from behind him.
With his added height, he was able to lean over Jake’s shoulder and reach your lips with his own, then after a few moments he used his finger underneath his chin to bring Jake’s face back and they connected again right in front of you.
Things were heating up quickly and you could feel the ache between your legs start to set in. “Boys, do we umm, want to take this party somewhere else?”
Danny, having been momentarily lost in kissing Jake, looked at you with glossed over eyes before quickly agreeing.
“I think we should find Josh and tell him we’re leaving first, so he knows we’re alright” Jake added.
“Right, I don’t need him interrupting later to check in on you” Danny brushed Jake’s hair over to the side and places a kiss on your hands before pulling away. “Not that you’ll be available to answer any phone calls”.
“Is that right?” Jake cocked an eyebrow, his hands still gripping into your hips like he never wanted to let go again.
Now that everyone was back on the same page again, your flirtatious side was coming out again so you joined in on the banter. “What do you have in store for us Danny?”
“Why don’t we hurry up and you can both find out for yourselves?”
The three of you found Josh in the dining room with a group that was lining up their next round of shots. He looked like he was still in full swing at the party, and standing right next to him was none other than Danny’s date.
“Josh, we’re leaving” Jake quickly announced to his brother, more than ready to get heading home.
“Wait! Already?” Josh complained, shot in hand and a pout on his face. He studied all of your faces, trying to determine without asking if whatever was wrong earlier had been resolved, but then he clocked Jake’s hand around your own. “Well, be safe getting home. Don’t wait up for me”.
“Wasn’t planning on it” Jake replied with a smirk and between him and Josh they both knew what that meant.
You started to follow him out the way you had come in earlier, from the back door in the kitchen, but you slowed Jake down when you noticed Danny was lingering behind.
“Will you be alright to get home?” He asked his date who looked like she had probably had one too many drinks since you left her downstairs.
“Yeah, I’ll make sure she’s safe” Josh put Danny to ease, just like Danny had for him outside.
“You’re leaving with her?” She asked Danny as she poured another shot straight into her plastic cup. “Why don’t you stay with me?”
“I’m leaving with both of them” Danny corrected, taking the cup to knock back the contents for her before tossing it into the trash can. “See you around sometime”.
He left her with the same shocked expression on her face as he had given her earlier when saying Jake was unavailable. It made sense now why he had shot her down so quickly, because Danny was willing to share you with him but no one else.
Even if you had two beers at the party, everything that had happened had sobered you up enough to drive back to the rental Jake and his brothers shared. The ride was quick, but the tension that built in the air between the three of you grew exponentially the closer you got to the destination. By the time the car was parked back in the driveway Jake was busting out of the back seat and hurrying over to the door to unlock it with his set of keys.
“You think Sam will be home soon?” You questioned when you and Danny joined him.
“If he is, then he will be in for a treat” Danny chuckled as he wrapped his hands around your waist and pressed your back to his front. With just the pair of tight jeans between the two of you, his excitement was already evident by the way his half erection pressed into your ass.
Jake got the door open and before you knew it he was pulling you from Danny’s hold and relieving you of your shirt as his lips crashed back into yours. Danny made sure the door was shut and locked back up before returning behind you and placing kisses all over your bare shoulders. His fingers found the clasp of your bra, then they pulled at your straps until the piece was slipping from your chest and joining your shirt on the floor.
Pressed between the two of them you felt your knees start to shake from arousal. You could feel both of them growing harder and you gained Jake’s attention by reaching down to cup him over his pants.
He moaned against your mouth and Danny hummed against your neck in approval. “You want to make Jake feel good first? I think we owe him that after earlier”.
You bit your lip as you started to unbutton Jake’s pants next, smiling at the way his face flushed when you started to pull them down past the swell of his ass. “Take these off Jakey” you requested and he obediently helped pull his legs free as you lowered yourself in front of him.
Jake was standing face to face with Danny now that you were on your knees between them, his blush only growing brighter as Danny removed his hat again and pulled his shirt off as well. His focus was quickly taken away though when you pulled the waistband of his boxers down and took him out with your hand.
“You want her mouth?” Danny asked as he watched you stroke him slowly from base to tip. Jake nodded his head, afraid to open his mouth and hear whatever lewd moans that would no doubt come spilling out.
“Tell her” Danny instructed, as he reached forward and grabbed Jake’s hand. He retrieved the black elastic Jake wore around his finger, usually for his own long strands when they became unruly enough to warrant being pulled into a bun, but Danny used it to gather your hair up from your face and tie it back in a low ponytail. “She’s waiting”.
“Fuck,” Jake panted, already growing frenzied from just Danny standing there watching you jerk him off. “I want your mouth” he admit, looking down right in time to see you smiling and giving him a kiss on the underside of his over sensitive head. He was unable to fight back the whine that did surface when you licked him next, all the way from his balls and up his shaft until you were wrapping your lips all the way around him.
Though this was the first time you had given Jake head, it wasn’t by any means your first rodeo, so you wasted no time pulling out all the stops trying to get a rise out of Jake as much as you were putting on a show for Danny.
“Damn, I didn’t know she was so good at that” Danny commented, his own hand palming himself through his jeans for a bit of relief.
“Me neither” Jake replied, his voice getting caught at the top of his throat when you took him all the way down yours and held him there.
Unable to stand by and watch any longer, Danny dropped down to his knees next to you and pulled on your pony tail until you were popping off Jake with tears starting to well in your eyes. Even with saliva still smeared across your face, Danny hungrily attacked your lips with his own, making sure Jake could see the way he tugged at your ponytail again to tilt your head back and slip his tongue inside.
Jake, though he admired the way you both kissed so passionately, interrupted by taking a hold of Danny by his chin and turning him towards his still wet cock. Danny opened his mouth without even the slightest hesitation and took Jake in, his eyes fluttering closed as he hollowed out his checks and sucked hard enough that Jake was tossing his head back and crying out.
You whimpered at the sight, feeling the way your panties soaked through and you squeezed your thighs together. Somehow Jake managed to register your tiny sounds, and he decided it was time to move to the bedroom before he got too lost in what was happening and you guys really did put on a show for Sam when he returned. So he tapped Danny’s shoulder and leaned down to help pick you up off the floor.
“How exactly are we going to do this?” You questioned with a giggle as the three of you stood each of you half dressed in front of Jake’s tiny bed.
“We’ll make it work” Danny answered and started to unbuckle his belt so he could rid himself of his own jeans. Jake followed suit by finally taking his shirt off, the both of them throwing their clothes somewhere in the corner of the room.
You had seen both of them shirtless plenty of times but it never ceased to amaze you how beautiful they both were, especially now as Danny ran his hand across Jake’s chest and they kissed again. Unfortunately it reminded you of your own toplessness, and you suddenly grew hyper aware of your body as you wrapped your arms around your chest.
“What’s the matter?” Danny asked, stepping away from Jake for a moment to come to your side.
“Nothing,” you shrugged your shoulders, but your hands gripped tightly into your upper arms, feeling the way they were squishy compared to his nicely toned upper body.
Jake instantly knew what you were thinking, he knew the way you struggled with body image issues in high school, and even still now though you had really grown out of it and learned to love the shape of your body no matter what anyone else said about it. “You’re so beautiful” he offered, hoping his reassurance would put your mind at ease.
“I know” you replied, giving him a soft smile in return. He had been so patient and endearing with you during your first time. When you were so scared to let him see you like this. It was definitely part of the reason your confidence blossomed into what it was today.
Danny had never seen you before though, and those old nerves were starting to resurface again. “I never knew you liked me like this” you said, looking up at Danny. “Never thought you found me attractive”.
Danny’s brows furrowed like he was offended you ever had that notion in the first place. “I have always thought you were attractive. You are a beautiful person on the inside and the outside”. He placed his hands on your shoulders, gently until he knew you were accepting of his touch and then he started to rub up and down your arms.
“Now,” his voice turned soft once more when you loosened your grip and let your arms fall to your sides again, “do you want to lay down on the bed so we can both prove to you just how sexy we think you are?”
You climbed onto the bed and sat in the middle, waiting for one or both of them to join you, but Danny already had something in mind. He walked back over to Jake, moving past him to pull the chair out from his desk and position it facing the bed. “Your turn to watch”.
With Jake sitting, Danny returned to you, easing you down onto your back as he hovered above you. “I’ve been thinking about this for so long, now that it’s actually happening I almost can’t believe it’s real”.
“I’ve thought about it too Danny” you reached around his shoulders, tangling your fingers in the thickness of his hair at the base of his neck.
“Tell me, what have you thought about?”
“About you touching me” you murmured, a sort of quiet calm falling over the room as you and Danny shared your moment.
He let his hands smooth up your thighs, giving them a squeeze and you a smirk “like this?”
“No, somewhere else”. Next he traveled up your hips, and you fought the flinch and recoil that came to you when his hands found their way across your stomach.
“Relax sweetheart” he cooed, making sure he was looking you in the eyes for any indication you truly wanted him to stop. “It’s just skin, soft and beautiful”.
You took his hands in yours and guided them further upwards until he was grabbing at your breasts. “Here” you breathed out, “touch me here”.
Having your chest fondled wasn’t usually on the top of your list of my favorite acts in the bedroom, but when Danny pinched your nipples between his fingers you let out a moan and arched your back. “Can I suck on them?” He asked, and you eagerly nodded. It was a combination of cold and warm, first the coolness of his wet tongue against the air as he licked over the hardened buds. Then warm when he pulled them into his mouth.
You moaned again, but the whimper you heard didn’t come from you. Looking to the side you saw Jake, still sitting patiently in his chair and stroking himself softly.
“Mmhmm, look over here” Danny popped off your breast to call your attention back. “It’s just me and you right now”.
You sighed contently as he went back to sucking on the other side, both of your nipples lathered up in spit and slightly aching from how hard they were.
Danny sat back up, his fingers playing with the button on your jeans. “Let’s take these off now”. You helped by lifting your hips, and he easily pulled them down your legs and off your body despite how hard they’d been to squeeze into before the party.
He leaned down again and placed a kiss on your lower tummy, then your hip. You could feel how wet you were already, and there was no way with his face so close to your center he couldn’t tell as well. “These too?” He framed his request into a question this time, his teeth nipping and pulling at the waistband of the thong you’d chosen to wear tonight. For the sake of no panty lines of course, not because you ever expected tonight would end with Danny using his teeth to peel them down.
You hooked your thumbs into the straps and quickly pulled them all the way down, Danny having to pull away again so you could get your legs free, then you were finally spread completely bare before him.
Danny settled between your thighs, urging you to bring your legs up and spread them wider so he could get a better look. “Fuck Jake, she’s perfect everywhere isn’t she?”
“I know” Jake answered, almost smugly as he’d had the pleasure of being in Danny’s exact position once before.
“So you two have had some fun already then?” Danny shook his head in faux disbelief, resolving himself that he wasn’t going to waste his chance to outdo the other man. So he dove in, his tongue finding every sensitive place you had to offer him and lapping at your juices until you were a shaking moaning mess. His tongue settled on your clit, slowing down a little to not overstimulate you so quickly as he positioned two fingers at your entrance.
“Danny, please” you bucked your hips into his face, searching for more.
Without having to ask again, Danny plunged his fingers deep inside you, increasing the pressure with his tongue in the same step, and within minutes you were spiraling towards your peak. Danny gripped your thigh with his free hand, and continued to pump his fingers in and out of you until your orgasm came washing over your entire body and you were drenching his mouth in your release. He re-emerged from between your legs with an amused smile, wiping his face clean with the back of his clean hand. “Have you ever squirt before?”
“No?” You giggled nervously, thinking maybe he was joking because of how aroused you were, but he was entirely serious. “I don’t know if I can”.
“Do you want to try?”
You sheepishly agreed, not knowing how this was going to go, but willing to try because you trusted him. Both of them.
“Jake, come over here” Danny stood from the bed and called him over. Jake jumped at the chance to get to him again, connection their lips again and tasting you on Danny. “Go, hold her, make her feel comfortable”.
Jake joined you on the bed, crawling around until he was behind you. Danny grabbed your hips and pulled you down until your ass was nearly hanging off the edge of the mattress and Jake let you use his legs as a pillow.
“You mind if we make a little mess?” Danny grinned as he got back between your legs from the floor, confident as ever he was going to absolutely rock your world.
“Fuck no” Jake answered him. “You ready sweetheart?” He had tucked himself back into his boxers, but you could still see the tent in the fabric when you turned to nuzzle your nose into the fold where his thigh met his hips. You tried to nip and mouth at his erection, but he placed a hand on your cheek. “Not yet, Danny’s gonna make you cum first then we can get back to that”.
“Relax for me” Danny, slid his fingers in again, and from this angle he was able to reach deep inside to the point you were arching your back again and reaching up to find somewhere on Jake to grip tightly. He held one hand, and the other grabbed a fist full of the back of his boxers.
Still recovering from your first high, it didn’t take Danny long to get you back to the edge with his mouth, but once you started to feel that tightening in your stomach, he pulled his mouth away and pressed down on your lower tummy as his fingers started to curl inside you.
“Oh my god!” You cried out, tightening your grips on Jake to the point you might’ve been hurting him, but your mind was too far gone to care.
“Right there beautiful, that’s it” Danny coaxed you closer to climax again. “Does it feel good?”
You were squirming, unable to control the way your body shook. “I feel too good” you whimpered, afraid you were reaching overstimulation now.
“Don’t fight it” Danny continued working his fingers, his thumb reaching around and pressing against your clit. That was all you needed to break, your second orgasm gushing from you without warning. He pulled his fingers out quickly and circled them around your clit again until you were clamping your things shut around his hand.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck, okay!”
“I think she needs a little break” Jake told Danny, watching the way your chest rose and fell as you tried to catch your breath. “Don’t want to break her so early in the night”.
“I think you might be right” Danny agreed. He found a piece of stray clothing to clean his hands off with, and your legs a little bit, then helped pull you back upright. “You alright?” He asked, smoothing the hairs that had pulled free from your now messy ponytail.
“Mind if Jake and I play a little now?”
You nodded and gave him a kiss, whispering into his ear before pulling away. “Don’t go easy on him”.
“Wasn’t planning on it” he chuckled back, chasing your lips with his until you were scooting back on the bed and finding somewhere to rest for a moment.
Danny moved to take your place, sitting on the edge of the bed before pulling Jake into his lap. “Are you having a good time?” He asked as he peppered kisses across Jake’s chest.
“Hmm, I am” Jake replied, catching your eyes from behind Danny’s shoulder and giving you a warm smile. “Are you?”
“I’m surprised I’m still holding it together right now honestly. I never thought I’d really get to hold you like this”.
Danny nearly went back on his word when Jake started to grind his hips down into Danny’s lap, giving them both a little of the friction they craved. “I want you to do a lot more than just hold me Danny”.
“Oh?” Danny took hold of Jake’s hips and started to rut upwards to meet him halfway causing Jake to whimper again and sigh. “Tell me what you want then”.
Jake closed his eyes and pursed his lips as his grinding sped up. It wasn’t enough, but it felt good enough to keep chasing the sensation. At least until Danny abruptly stopped him. “Come on Jake, you’re going to tell me what you want or I’m going to go back to that gorgeous girl over there. She was so good for me”.
Jake opened his eyes again and he searched for you, finding you propped up against his pillows and watching intently. Though neither of you were new to being with each other, having Danny here, another man was, and he worried for a moment what you might think of him if he were to be absolutely honest.
“Don’t be shy now Jakey” you called to him, knowing exactly how he was feeling in this moment. “Tell him what you want. We’re both here for you”.
“I want you to fuck me Danny” Jake finally pleaded, before hiding his face in the crook of Danny’s neck.
He felt Danny’s chest rumble when he laughed, and Danny ran his hands up Jake’s spine to sooth him. “How’s that sound beautiful girl? You want to take turns fucking him?”
That was a rhetorical question, who wouldn’t want that? You let your hand come to rest between your legs now, your fingers running through your folds and gathering up the slick from your new found arousal.
Jake stood up tentatively, then moved over to his dresser where he opened the top drawer and retrieved a bottle of lube and a couple of condoms. When he turned around Danny had already rid himself of his last shred of clothing, and the two of you were both waiting for him to return.
The next few movements were a blur of kisses and soft touches, then before you knew if Danny had Jake fully naked as well and shamefully on his hands and knees in front of you.
“Jake’s such a good boy isn’t he?” Danny teased as he grabbed his ass and gave it a squeeze before spreading him apart and spitting on his hole. “Let’s see how far we can push him”.
Jake turned his face into the sheets to hide his groaning as Danny’s fingers circled his entrance, massaging the muscle and getting him used to the touch until he started to press the first one inside.
“That’s it Jakey, his fingers feel good don’t they?” You sweet talked him through it as you rubbed his back and played with his hair. You let Danny take his time stretching him for a while before moving to his side and kissing at his shoulders.
“Can I?” You asked as Danny’s patience was cut between you reaching around to palm at his length and Jake moaning for more. He pulled his fingers free and moved aside, allowing you room to reach Jake, but instead of replacing his fingers with yours you leaned over and slipped your tongue right inside him as far as it would go.
Jake yelped and tilted his hips back, not expecting to feel your mouth, but so thankful for it as you fucked your tongue in and out. While you had Jake distracted Danny took the opportunity to roll one of the condoms on and lather himself up with lube. Though he had yet to be touched very much, just a few strokes with the lube in his hand was all he needed to know he was going to have to take this very slowly if he was going to last longer than a few minutes.
“Why don’t you go lay underneath him?” Danny asked after tapping your shoulder. You wiped your mouth and followed suit, laying back down onto the pillows and letting Jake climb on top of you and take a familiar place between your legs. Jake was still nervous, but at least this way he was able to look into your eyes and find some peace there.
“I dream about this all the time” Jake whispered as he kissed at your neck, his tip already nudging against your bundle of nerves and making you clench around nothing, waiting for him to be inside you again. “No ones ever been more perfect than you”.
“Then what are you waiting for” you asked, rocking your hips in motion with him.
Jake got into position first, slipping inside with ease and pushing all the way in before he bottomed out and pausing to wait for Danny. He wasn’t far behind, using one hand to push on Jake’s shoulders and get him to lower himself a little more while the other lined himself up.
You watched as Jake’s eyes pinched shut, brows furrowed, and his jaw went slack for a moment, his body and mind trying to wrap around all the sensations of being buried inside you and penetrated all at once. “I think he’s good now” you let Danny know he was in the clear to start moving when Jake’s expression softened and he looked at you again with all the adoration in the world. Danny took his cue, slowly building a steady pace until he was snapping his hips into Jake and the force was causing him to push further into you.
His arms were starting to shake on either side of you, strained from holding himself steady in position so that no one slipped out of place. All you wanted was for him to be comfortable, the same way he had gone above and beyond to make sure you enjoyed your first time, so you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and pulled him down into a hug letting him rest his cheek against your chest.
Danny leaned forward with him, getting an even better angle so that now he was nudging right up against that spot inside Jake that made him inhale sharply and an uncontrollable moan forced its way out his throat.
“Ahhh fuck!” He cried out, wrapping his arms underneath yours and squeezing you tight. “I can’t, I’m gonna cum”.
“Me too” you chimed, no doubt your fluttering around him part of the reason he was so close. “Danny?”
“Yeah I’m right there. Who wants it? You or Jake?” He answered, his thrusts already slowing speed and growing sloppy.
“Come here, we can share” you replied and Danny quickly pulled himself from Jake before ripping off the condom. He had enough stamina left in him to make it upright with both feet on the floor, standing beside you on the bed and pumping himself towards his finish.
Jake sat back up and started thrusting in you again, chasing his own high until he watched as you took Danny in your hand and guided him to your mouth. All at once Danny and Jake were both filling you and your orgasm came wracking through your body at the feeling of warmth washing all over.
Just as you said, when Danny stepped away first, you sat up with Jake and pushed your lips to his, swapping Danny’s load back and forth a few times until it was pretty evenly distributed and you both swallowed with a dazed smile.
“You two are the hottest couple I’ve ever fucking met” Danny gasped out, wiping the bit of sweat that had accumulated on his chest with his thumb.
“The three of us are the hottest couple” you corrected him, beckoning him over to share a few more kisses before you all managed to puzzle yourselves together on the bed and blissfully fall asleep.
You woke up to a quiet sound. It wasn’t too early, but you were still tired enough to want to fall back asleep until you figured out what exactly it was you were hearing. When you opened your eyes, your back was against the wall and you were practically laying on top of Danny who was on his back but with his head turned away. Jake was on his side, curled up to Danny as well and they were kissing deeply, their tongues fighting for dominance over the other before Jake finally gave in and melted into submission.
“Someone’s awake” Danny paused their early make out session to announce your return to consciousness.
Jake reached over Danny’s chest and grabbed your hand, pulling you toward him until you were resituated between them, you front to Danny and your back to Jake. Danny captured your lips with his, kissing you just like he had Jake only seconds ago while Jake’s hands roamed all over your body.
“How do you feel?” Danny asked, clearly trying to gauge whether or not you were up for a round two so soon like they very clearly were.
“Never been better” you smiled, your voice catching when Jake’s hand snaked between your thighs to see if you were wet. Of course you were, you’d woken up naked in bed with not one, but both of them. Last night felt like a dream, but the dull ache in your core when Jake delved his fingers in reminded you that it was very much real.
“Jake was just telling me about how good you feel” Danny smiled as he watched your face contort into that of pure pleasure when he added his fingers to the mix, circling them around your clit. “Want to feel you so bad”.
“You want me to keep going?” Jake asked as he pumped his fingers in and out of you, “or do you want Danny to fill you up?”
Your head was spinning from all the possibilities of how this could play out, but when it came down to it, only one thing truly mattered to you. “I want you both. Please”.
“That’s a good girl” Danny kissed your forehead and pulled your leg up around his hip just as Jake retreated his hand only to move around to your backside. He used your slick to press his finger inside, then another until you were moaning and clawing at Danny’s shoulders.
Danny reached between your bodies and guided himself through your folds, and then Jake was there too spitting into his palm for a little extra lubrication so he could ease himself behind. Once Jake was finally situated, Danny thrust in and you cried out from how good it felt to be so full and connected with both of them.
They both started to move and all you could do was just lay there and take it, let them both use you to reach their own finish as you were sure your climax was already budding deep in your stomach.
The room was filled with the sounds of your combined moans and thrusting until everyone came to a halt at the sound of a door slamming shut from across the hallway. Sam, or Josh if he’d somehow made it home instead of sleeping at the fraternity house.
“Please don’t start fucking again!” Sam hollered grumpily. You guessed he had gotten back sometime last night, but in the heat of everything no one had noticed.
“He will get over it” Danny shrugged and you couldn’t help but giggle at how absurd it was, but also you didn’t want to stop right now either.
As quietly as you could, the three of you finished what you were in the middle of. Well they finished with you in the middle, crashing into your orgasm with blinding force.
“I need a shower, desperately” you announced after pulling yourself free from the tangle of limbs. “And to brush my teeth”.
“Your toothbrush is still in the bathroom” Jake replied, sitting up and examining the mess that really was made between last night and this morning. “You go ahead and we will clean up a bit”.
After your shower, you left the bathroom feeling like a new woman, wearing one of Danny’s many shirts that he’d left over here and a pair of Jake’s boxers. Your mouth minty fresh with Jake’s toothpaste.
Jake and Danny still needed to shower, so you left the bedroom to find something to eat in the kitchen, but as you rounded the corner from the hallway to the living room you nearly ran into Sam.
“Oh hey Sam!” You tried to sound excited to see him, and you usually were, though you were thoroughly embarrassed it was under these circumstances. “I’m sorry about last night”.
“It’s alright” he sighed, “I’m just glad Danny will finally shut up about being obsessed with you two”.
“He told you?” You asked, but it wasn’t really that surprising considering how close they were. Then you thought for a moment, sure you were in Danny’s shirt but you were in Jake’s room. How did Sam add that up so quickly? “Wait, how did you know Danny was with us?”
Sam’s eyes shifted over to the floor of the living room where a pile of mixed clothes had been forgotten. “Those are Jake’s pants, that’s Danny’s hat and shirt, I’m assuming that’s your shirt”.
Your face lit up in even more embarrassment. So Sam had known since the second he got home what exactly was going on.
“Next time give me a warning okay? I’ll go crash with Josh or something” he pat you on the shoulder and continued back down the hallway to his own bedroom where you heard the door shut gently closed behind him this time.
You gathered up the clothes and tossed them into Jake’s room before heading back to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee while waiting for the others to finish getting cleaned up. Danny joined you first, pressing up against you from behind and stealing a bite of the toast you had just made.
“God I’m starving. Please tell me they have something other than just bread”.
“There’s some eggs in the fridge I can fry” you giggled, pushing your ass back up against him as he grinned down at you devilishly. “So Sam knows”.
“He was going to find out sooner or later, better it be now” Danny didn’t seem to care much at all as he turned to open the fridge and you bent down to shuffle through their cabinets for a pan and some cooking oil.
“You know, he mentioned something about you being obsessed with us”.
“I may or may not have drunkenly confessed to him one night about how badly I liked you guys”. Danny set the eggs down on the counter with a shrug. “Now, are you going to tell me why you and Jake insisted with everyone that you weren’t together?”
You thought about it for a moment, the simple truth being that the both of you had it in your minds you were just friends, so you stuck to it. “We were just trying to give each other some space to figure out if that was really what we wanted. Though we spend most of our time together, we were missing that extra something to spark that fire. I think you are that spark”.
“Is that eggs?” Jake finally joined the two of you in the kitchen, having taken some extra time to strip his sheets and start a load of laundry.
As soon as Jake was within snatching range Danny grabbed him by the waist and pulled him into a kiss that had you smiling fondly at them when Jake relaxed into it.
“What’s that for?” Jake sheepishly asked, though he wrapped his arms around Danny too.
“Nothing, just some spark” Danny grinned back at you and you shook your head and continued getting some breakfast made for your hungry boys.
Fin.
Tags: @kultavalo @sanguinebats @gracev0609 @lipstickitty @writingcold @musicislove3389 @fleetingjake @milojames16
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charlottesbookclub · 2 months
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ser gwayne hightower fluff alphabet 💚💚
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Summary: just what it says on the tin: fluff alphabet for my boy gwayne (do people still do these anymore? idc I'm doing it bc I love reading them and I thought I'd try writing one myself 😌😌)
Warnings/Tags: gn!reader; spouse!reader; established relationship (marriage); we are all going to have fluff-induced cavities after this, I fear (it's more absolute tooth-rotting fluff, y'all!); let me know if I've missed anything! ☺️
Words: 2985
Author’s Note: I'm meeting with my phd advisor today which is going to be totally fine (she is so super sweet) but my brain decided we were going to have major anxiety about it, and what better way to distract myself than by writing fluff for gwayne!! 🥰💚 I've never done one of these before, but I always enjoyed reading them, so I thought I'd try it myself! ☺️ I like that it lets me explore his character without having the pressure of a plot lol
as always, I hope y'all enjoy and feel free to let me know your thoughts!! ☺️💕
template by: magical-warlock
A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?
Honestly anything. I feel like if it was something you enjoyed, Gwayne would find himself enjoying it too, just because you were happy. But I think like he would really like going on leisurely walks or horse rides together. It’s an activity that allows you to talk and get to know one another, but where you can also explore the beauty of a garden or forest together. I could totally see him bringing a book along and reading it aloud to you under a tree.
B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?
Everything lmao. But your eyes stand out to him, especially when he can read all the things you don’t say out loud in them. I feel like he would also appreciate intellect, common sense, and wit. He is clearly sooooo done with Criston’s weird dumb bullshit, and I think someone who was rational and level-headed but not afraid to crack a joke or two (especially at Criston’s expense lmaooooo) would be really appealing to him.
C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?
My mans would not be much help at first because he’s freaking out too. He wouldn’t want to see you in any kind of distress, especially if he’s not sure where it came from or what’s causing it. I think if it happened more than once and you talked about it and expressed what you needed, he would be more than willing to do whatever you needed from him. My sense is that his first reaction (after the initial freak out) would just be to hold you really tightly and whisper reassurances to you until you were feeling better.
D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?
Given the society that Gwayne lives in, his expectations have kind of been set for him in the sense that his future is pretty much expected to involve marriage and children. And honestly, I get the sense that this isn’t something he’s necessarily opposed to. Especially since he found you and realizes he gets to marry someone he actually loves, he’d be pretty thrilled about the whole prospect. It just doesn’t seem like life on miliary campaign is something he’s super jazzed about, so his ideal future would likely be just settling down with you in Oldtown. 
E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?
I think it’s pretty mixed, especially depending on the context. Again, given the societal expectations placed on him, I do think he might tend to be a little more dominant (especially if he thinks/knows that he’s right about something) but I also don’t think he would ever force you to do something you didn’t want to. He’d also back off on just about any subject if he noticed you were getting upset about it. I also think it really depends on your temperament, since I think he could really go either way depending on what energy you brought to the relationship.
F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?
It would be really hard for him to stay mad at you (and vice versa). Unless it was something truly awful, I just don’t think he could stay upset with you for very long. As we’ve already established, he’s a pretty rational person who seems to value clear communication, so I think “fights” with him would be more like difficult discussions about hard issues rather than an actual fight. This is really nice because then you both get to speak your mind and actually come out with a better understanding of the other person and a stronger relationship because of it.
G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?
I do tend to think that he’s a pretty grateful person, but I think he’s better at showing it than saying it sometimes. Not that he can’t verbalize his gratitude – he totally can – I just think that gestures come more naturally to him (like winning a tourney in your honor, buying you something extravagant, taking you on a nice trip, etc.)
H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?
Yes and no. If there was something he knew that would put you in danger if you knew it, he would not tell you. He would never forgive himself if something happened as a result. Pretty much anything else though, he’ll tell you. He won’t always offer everything, but I think he would have a hard time lying to you or keeping things from you if you asked about them. Depending on what it was, he might tell you a sanitized version of the story because he doesn’t want you to worry, but he’d be as honest as he felt he could be in the moment.
I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helping them overcome personal problems?
I think in any good relationship (romantic, platonic, or otherwise) people change each other for the better. Gwayne is no exception to this, and I think it’s likely that he picks up habits from you (just as you do from him). I can definitely see that if he had you as a confidante to rant about Criston or just to express his worries and doubts about politics, his family, etc. that he might be a little less overtly antagonistic and instead might just smile and nod a little more but internally be like “wait til my s/o hears about this fucking bullshit.” He’d definitely still give Critston attitude tho
J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?
Yes and no. Gwayne is a fairly confident person, and I think he feels pretty comfortable with himself and with his relationship with you for the most part. However, I don’t think he’s immune to jealously, especially if it were to seem like another person was paying you a bit too much attention. In that scenario, I’m sure he’d have some quip at that person’s expense and whisk you away or be very obvious about using your title as his spouse. The one thing that might make him feel truly insecure is if it seemed like you were becoming interested in someone else. But let’s be real, if you get to marry Ser Gwayne Hightower, that’s not fucking happening 
K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?
Oh, he’s definitely a good kisser. I don’t think he was one to have a lot of trysts prior to meeting you (despite his bravado, I think he really values an emotional or intellectual connection to the person he’s with, meaning I don’t think many of the flings he might have had made it all the way to the hook-up stage). But he’s a handsome man who likely had a lot of admirers, and I do think he got a bit of practice with kissing in his youth. He’s absolutely very attentive to what you like, so I think he’s only gotten to be an even better kisser over the course of your relationship. In terms of your first kiss with him, these lyrics from “All My Love” by Noah Kahan are very applicable here: “I leaned in for a kiss thirty feet from where your parents slept / and I looked so confident, babe / I swear, I was scared to death.” Especially early on, I think he really wanted to project this confident and suave vibe that he totally knew what he was doing, but as soon as he realized he was in love with you, he was actually a nervous wreck and desperately did not want to mess it up. 
L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?
re: Gwayne’s penchant for gestures, I have a feeling he had a whole well-written speech planned out (he based it on the dramatic love confessions he read in old ballads). However, despite all his preparation, I think the confession actually ended up just slipping out one time when you were together and he couldn’t keep it in any longer. He probably stumbled over his words and was very embarrassed about it and his face turned bright pink, but it was so adorable and endearing that you actually preferred it to whatever speech he might have had planned.
M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the wedding be like?
As I mentioned above, I think that marriage is pretty much a given for Gwayne considering the realities of the culture in which he lives. He also probably didn’t propose in the traditional sense, since the marriage was likely arranged, but I can absolutely envision him proposing to you privately after the betrothal has been officially announced and after he’s spent enough time with you to realize that he is genuinely in love with you. It would be sort of a love confession/proposal where he basically says “I know you were chosen by others to be my spouse, but I also personally choose you because I love you.” The wedding would be fairly large and befitting of his rank and station, and it’s likely that neither of you would have much choice in how it was conducted. Gwayne definitely likes the idea of a large and fairly public wedding because it’s a way for him to show his pride for both his house and his betrothed.
N icknames - What do they call their s/o?
Very sweet things! Mostly “my dear,” “my love,” and “dearheart,” with a sprinkle of “my darling” mixed in on occasion.
O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious to others? How do they express their feelings?
He gets very love-struck, especially when he’s with you. Spending time with you is like spending time in another world for him, and I do think he becomes a little more uninhibited when he’s around you. If people watch the two of you together, his lovesickness is pretty obvious to anyone who knows him. Even if they speak to just him, they might notice slight changes, like the fact that he talks about you a lot and always finds a way to bring you into the conversation. He’s careful though, and would never reveal the depths of his affection for you to someone who might you it against him or hurt you to get back at him. In terms of expressing feelings, as I mentioned above, I get the sense that he’s one for gestures that demonstrate his feelings. He gets nervous and stumbles over his words more than usual when he tries to verbalize things to you, and that’s an unusual and uncomfortable experience for him at first. The longer you’re together though, the better he gets at it.
P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag about their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?
Because your betrothal and marriage are pretty much public knowledge, Gwayne definitely feels comfortable being upfront about the relationship. And oh he totally brags. He’s very proud to call you his spouse and is not afraid to make sure everyone knows about it. Based on societal and cultural expectations, I don’t think there would be a lot of open PDA (like hugs, kisses on the lips, etc.). But hand kisses?????????? All the fucking time babeyyyyyyy!!!!!!!! So many kisses on the knuckles wherever and whenever – it’s his favorite little gesture of affection
Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.
Mans is a killer shit talker. We know this. He can and will throw shade with the best of them. He wants to know all the drama in your friend circle and will happily judge everyone with you for hours. That one “friend” of yours who turned out to be wildly toxic and conniving? Well he never liked them anyway and he’s got a bulletpointed list of reasons why. You start a conversation with “can I be mean for a moment?” or “you know I love this person, but…” and he is SAT. He’s always on your side and ready to talk absolute shit about anyone who caused you even a minor inconvenience. 
R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?
At the end of the day, he’s something of a hopeless romantic and would do whatever he could to make you happy. There are a lot of times when the cultural and societal realities of the world he lives in prevent him from doing everything he might want, but if it came down to it, he would do almost anything for you. A lot of his romantic gestures are a little cliché, but in the best, most endearing way possible. As he gets to know you though, and as your relationship matures, he’ll probably get a little more creative and do things that are more specific to the two of you.
S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?
Believes in you and supports you 100000% no question. Again though, I think this impulse can be a bit hampered by the social structures in which he lives. He’ll do whatever he can to help you achieve your goals, but there are limits based on birth, status, etc. that you are both cognizant of and which might influence what those goals look like and how far either of you would go to achieve them.
T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice up your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?
We’re talking about Ser “I’d rather stay at a comfy inn than camp out” Gwayne Hightower here – I think he appreciates a level of routine and comfort. There’s so much in his world that is chaotic and out of his control that I think he would really relish having that consistency and stability in his relationship. Not that he would never try anything new – especially if you asked him to – I just think his natural inclination would be to have a comforting routine that works for both of you.
U nderstanding - How well do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?
Considering he picked up on Alicent and Criston’s weird vibes in like 5 seconds, I’d say he’s pretty good at reading people. He definitely makes an effort to get to know you, and can confidently say that he knows you very well at this point. Especially since you’re someone he cares about and spends a lot of time with, he’s quite good at reading your moods and guessing how you’re feeling.
V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is its worth in comparison to other things in their life?
Very important. Again though, there are cultural expectations placed on both of you that may necessitate you and Gwayne placing your relationship further down your list of priorities than you normally would choose to. If it were completely up to him though, his relationship with you would be right up there at the top with his loyalty to his house and his family.
W ild Card - A random fluff headcanon
I talked about this much more extensively in this fic, but the necklace you gave him? He. Does. Not. Take. It. Off. EVER. It’s his little piece of you that he gets to carry everywhere, and he could never ever bear to part with it.
X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?
In private, abso-fucking-lutely! As I mentioned in the PDA section, he’s more retrained in public, but still likes to demonstrate his affection for you via hand kisses. In private though, he loves to cuddle. And honestly, he doesn’t really care where or in what position – curled up in bed, sprawled on a couch, his head in your lap, you tucked against his chest – he just likes to be touching you and knowing that you’re right there next to him, that you’re safe, and that you love him.
Y earning - How do they cope when they’re missing their partner?
It’s a reality he has to face more than he would like, given the exterior expectations placed on him. If he had his way, he would live quietly with you at his family’s property near Oldtown forever. When he has to leave though, he always asks for your favor to take with him, regardless of how long you’ve been together or how many times you’ve bestowed it. As mentioned above, he also always wears the necklace you gave him. Definitely a top tier professional yearner though – he misses you and thinks of you the whole time he’s gone.
Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?
This answer will be pretty similar to the answer for “V” – yes he is, but he also has to be cognizant of outside pressures that might cause him to act in ways that don’t always align with his personal inclinations. He would both die and kill for you though, not that you’re asking him to do either. In fact, you’re usually telling him not to do either of those things.
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beaniegaebie · 7 months
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i don't really have any solid conclusions about this yet but i noticed A Thing in a rewatch and i haven't found it mentioned elsewhere yet so here we go
(apologies for the appalling image quality you're about to see, i can't screenshot easily rn pls bear with)
OKAY so in the scene where crowley confronts gabriel about "shut up and die", something about the arrangement of book stacks caught my eye a little
the majority of the books are angled so that we mostly just see the page edges and not the spines clearly, EXCEPT for a particularly shiny and familiar colour combo right here-
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but nothing too weird going on there, i thought, crowley coloured books in a bookshop so what? right up until i registered crowley's line when we get a closer look-
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hhhhmmmmMMmmmm yes yes "everything just the way you wanted" huh, very interesting considering that we know how much thought goes into props huh
and for most of the shots we get of crowley in this position those freaking books are just quietly nestled right there in the corner-
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look at that god damn framing i fuckin see you, you glorious bastards
so i paused to see if i could figure out what the hell was up with those fuckers and this is when i absolutely lost my mind, your honour
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A and C you say?? in crowley colours???? framed like this?????? localised entirely within your kitchen???
anyway long story short they're two books from an Agatha Christie Crime Collection set (24 volumes, three stories per volume) and guess whats on the mfing front covers I'm-
(its a rant for another post but when paired with this other set of initials spotted in s2 i want to scream actually)
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ANYWAY back to the books, through an absolutely unhinged comparison of the formatting of gold text blobs i reckon the two we have here are:
(on top) The Pale Horse; The Big Four, The Secret Adversary
(on bottom) 4:50 From Paddington, Lord Edgeware Dies, Murder in Mesopotamia
(I'm fairly confident but if anyone has a better image to confirm/correct this pls do)
now here is where I'll need a bunch of help from some Christie-heads out there bc I haven't read any of these and I've only seen the tv adaptation of one of them, so i dont know for sure if these are like A Clue, or A Cool Thing, or if I've just fully brainrotted myself into a fun lil corner here? wa-hoo
but here's some initial stuff that jumped out at me after skimming the basics:
(some of) the titles: Pale Horse/Big Four - death's horse ofc, the four horsemen mayb? the them+adam?? ; Mesopotamia is a very biblical choice bbz ; 4:50 From Paddington- azi likes trains i guess? idk that one's tenuous lmao ; honestly no idea with the other two but Secret Adversary feels a tad ominous
iirc Big Four just has kind of an unusual history, it was initially twelve short stories that she later compiled into one, and it was published fairly soon after christie's mysterious disappearance/reappearance
in Big Four, poirot fakes his death at one point and doesnt even let hastings in on it and I'm hoping sure its totally irrelevant to the ineffable bois
part of the Pale Horse story is a group of assassins that basically try to pass off all their murders as being actually caused by like ✨satanic powers✨ which is interesting
christie knew a fUCkton about poisonings thats why she wrote so many into her work and, while i don't believe the poison coffee theory myself, it sure is an interesting link with how cyanide is associated with almond smell/flavour and that metatron chooses almond syrup in particular
(ALSO random side note that is mostly meaningless but I've worked in a good few uk coffee shops and have never worked anywhere that stocks almond syrup; almond milk yes, hazelnut syrup yes, but never almond syrup...? prob just the places i worked though lmao)
EDIT forgotten point: I've seen some speculation that the bently's plate reading "CURTAIN" could be a reference to poirot's last story, along side that alternate scene of crowley ordering the sherry for "miss marple", its just one too many agatha christie references for my melted brain to handle and I'm SUS
so this is where i run out of idea steam and hand it over to you lot because i have no clue what this could mean, if it even means anything other than a cool set feature
is there something here actually or am i yelling into the void just for fun?
who knows, who cares!
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jsprnt · 5 months
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Americano PT. 8 | Jude Bellingham x Reader
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What happens if two individuals who absolutely despise each other are forced to interact after unforeseen events occur?
A/N: this one is a bit on the shorter side, but I promise next chapter will be juicy! 😉
W/C: 3.086
part seven
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"Wait- why am I actually kind of bitter about this?"
I mumble, looking up at Luis. He turns around, moving his camera away to look at me.
"Bitter about what?" He asks, fidgeting with the settings of the device.
"They literally crap out money- but get a free BMW?" I question, folding my arms.
"Oh, please. Will you stop being such a negative person?"
He gives me a nasty look, his hand coming to grab my arm.
"Or go sit in the car..?" He adds, pointing behind me.
"No, it's too hot to sit in the car.." I complain, adjusting my sleeve.
"Why did you even follow me here in the first place?" He asks, raising his brows.
"I was done with my to-do list and didn't want to stay cooped up in the office.."
Not to mention to avoid the insanely annoying looks I had been receiving ever since those stupid rumors and photos had been out.
"Okay, just stay back and watch then.."
I watch him make cinematic shots of each individual model and car. My patience begins to thin when he's still busy with it twenty minutes later.
I pull my phone out of my pocket to keep myself busy. I carefully scroll through my Instagram explore page, ignoring the thousands of follower requests to my account.
The internet was very quick, so within hours of my face being online, people had found both my full name and social media accounts.
"y/n!"
I freeze, holding my phone against my chest, and turn in the direction the noise came from.
I make immediate eye contact with Valeria, her obnoxiously fake smile burning my eyes instantly.
"Yeah? Anything wrong with the shoot?" I ask, shoving my phone into my pocket.
"No, the players have just arrived- and it's a better look if you're off your phone and look interested."
I fight the urge to snort at her ridiculous comment, and just nod before I lose it.
"Sure, any reason you're here today? It's only for some short clips..”
I watch her take a step forward, a hand reaching up to her hip. She moves her neck in a weird way, staring at me for a moment.
"It's always good to see how my juniors work, and how close they are to the players is really something I like keeping an eye on.."
Oh- surprise, she was here for something stupid!
I was already over her snarky remarks, especially those insinuating a romantic relationship between Jude and me.
The thought only makes me want to gag.
I shiver at the cursed idea, noticing a few players already walking over to check out the new car they chose, and look back at Valeria.
"Well, I'm sure some of the guys really need your presence and knowledge. Please, go and join them.."
I instigate, hoping and wishing she goes to bother Toni instead.
For some reason, he could handle her bullshit really well.
"Oh, don't mind if I do.." She chuckles, immediately turning her back to me and walking away.
I sigh in relief, rubbing my nape to try to release some tension from my body.
I begin walking up to the cars myself, reading off every license plate to see which player got what model.
I stop at the car chosen by Aurélien, observing the details of the 'i4 eDrive35'.
« Très belle, non? » I hear him say. I nod, pursing my lips.
« Le couleur- noir est parfait.. » I compliment, stepping back to get a better view.
I open my mouth to say something else- but I'm startled by a loud car horn, it almost makes my eardrums explode. I shut my eyes tightly, not reacting fast enough to cover my ears properly.
"What the fuck.." I mumble, looking to my left. An obviously aggravated expression on my face, because who the hell thought that was a good idea?
“Jude! Get out of your mom’s car, please!” I exclaim, seeing him stand at the driver’s door.
The man couldn’t even drive, but got to choose a car for himself?
Not even that- he also chose the most expensive model worth more than a hundred thousand euros?
Life is so unfair.
“You’re standing in the way!” He exclaims, walking around to sit in the passenger seat. Another staff member comes over to drive him around the parking lot.
I give him a nasty look, stepping aside and looking back at Aurélien.
“Why don’t you join him?” He suggests, an obvious smirk on his face.
“What? Why would I do that?” I ask, raising my brows and folding my arms defensively.
“You know- nice car and fun drive..” He trails off, glancing at the moving car.
“I would feel like I’m in danger without him even being the driver..” I state, shielding my eyes from the sun with my hand.
He chuckles, as if to mock the fear for my safety. I shrug it off, looking behind me to see where Luis is.
“Come on- get in the car and I’ll get Luis to do a little video..” I usher, walking away to get Luis.
The entire shoot takes us about an hour before we’re finally done. I quickly bid farewell and thank fellow staff members for their hard work before jumping into my car.
I go to start my car, looking up to see where Luis is. I roll my windows down, letting some fresh air into the car, hoping he’ll be here quickly.
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“No- it’s just annoying because I’m trying to do my job properly and I’m getting the craziest stares. Like, does having a conversation with someone mean we’re married with three kids and a chihuahua?!” I exclaim, looking at Amira on FaceTime.
“And you attended his match, and you wore his name on your shirt and spoke to his family and-"
I cut her off with a loud groan, rubbing my eyes in irritation.
“You’re the one who set me up!”
“I thought you already knew it was his shirt! Should I have worn Jude’s while you wore Trent’s?” She defends herself, a smirk forming on her lips.
I shake my head, dropping my pencil on the table.
I had been studying all day and had stopped the instant Amira called me.
“The way I can’t even get mad at anyone about this- ugh..” I complain, shifting in my chair.
“And those follow requests are so annoying..”
I grumble, totally aware of the fact that I had been complaining about literally every single thing and then some.
“Girl, if you set your account on public again and accept those followers..”
“What? I’m going to clout chase being that douche's fake girlfriend?”
“Obviously?”
“I have to take over my dad’s firm one day, and you want me to be known for dating my coworker?”
“Too late-"
I stop paying attention to what she’s saying when the front door opens, my gaze moving to see my dad walking in.
“I’m going to call you back later.” I mutter to Amira, waving at her until she hangs up.
I close my laptop, standing up to walk over to the door.
“Hey, dad- you’re late.” I say, grabbing his laptop bag off of him.
“I had a lot of work to review. Did you have dinner?” He asks, hanging his coat up on the coat rack.
“I had some of the food auntie Carmen made. You?”
“We all had dinner in the office. Everyone has been going home late these days.” He says, washing his hands in the kitchen sink before loosening his tie.
“With what?” I ask, setting his laptop bag on the table, prying into his business.
“Can’t say, but- don’t you think you need to tell me something?” He suddenly asks, turning to me.
I freeze, looking at him with wide eyes.
What the hell would I be hiding from him?
“Uh- no? I’m not sure what you’re talking about?” I state, scratching my nape in confusion.
“Are you sure?” He presses on, coming to hold onto my shoulders.
“I’m sure. What am I supposed to hide from you?” I ask, getting rather defensive, a frown forming in between my brows as I keep staring at him.
He notices my irritation, letting go of my shoulders and holding his hands up in surrender.
“Okay- I understand. Don’t get all angry at me..” He says, smiling.
“I’m not angry- just confused..”
“Forget I asked- How was work? How about you tell me about that instead?”
I purse my lips, looking down at my laptop.
“Alright, the players got new cars, so we had to do a shoot for BMW..” I mutter, fiddling with my notebook.
“You look so down, y/n. What? Are you jealous? I got you your new Audi less than two years ago..”
“What do you mean, dad? I love that car, would not exchange an Audi for a BMW- I have some car knowledge.” I state, my expression changing as I explain to him.
“That’s right! Come to me when you really want to change your car. I’ll call up some people I know.”
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I make my way towards the printer, looking for the documents I had sent over to be copied a couple hours ago. Finding them, I quickly read them through to confirm the pages are complete, until I’m stopped by Hugo.
“Are you ready for El Classico week?” He asks, making a copy of something.
Most people, as in football fans, would say an El Classico is a match you shouldn’t miss. The long-standing rivalry between the two clubs was always interesting to watch, and I would definitely agree a hundred percent-
Only, if it didn’t mean we had to ensure our match posts, interviews, and statements were properly prepared and triple-checked and approved days leading up to the match.
Of course, I loved watching the game- but the way it exhausted literally everyone involved was no fun.
What made it harder was the fact that we had a whole Champions League match to worry about first. To sum it all up, no one was getting sleep for the next two weeks.
“Yeah, just really busy with preparations.” I reply, folding the corner of the documents.
“Good luck, we’ve all been having sleepless nights. It will be worth it in the end- you’ve experienced this before. Just keep on doing what you always do.”
I nod in acknowledgment, smiling at him.
“You’re right, we will put our best foot forward.” I give him a thumbs up, chuckling.
“Good- I’ll see you at lunch. Work hard!” He encourages, patting my shoulder before leaving with his printed papers.
I sigh in relief when he leaves, making my way up to my desk. I place the documents on the table, before running down to the pitch. Having to finish some last-minute recording of the match preparations.
I walk over to the pitch, training is already in full motion, and I notice Luis already there. I look around for any other staff members, only seeing the creepy guy I ran into weeks ago standing across the pitch.
The guy was a walking, real-life jumpscare at this point. I’d only run into him at random moments, and the way he’d look at me had my heart leaping into my throat.
“You’re late.” Luis complains, bringing me out of my thoughts, fiddling with a black cable.
“Did those two minutes kill you?” I ask, sighing, and look at the players who were training.
“Of boredom, yes..” He replies, and I notice the small- very slight compliment in his words. A smile forming on my face as I chuckle.
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“We would’ve been absolutely fucked if Kepa didn’t save that one..” I mutter, insanely stressed, as I eye the scoreboard in the Lluís Companys Olympic Stadium. A temporary stadium FC Barcelona had been using for this season.
“Don’t say that- you have no trust in this team whatsoever..” Luis complains, looking up at me.
“Who will score?” I ask, we loved guessing who would score and assist goals during every match.
“Jude.” He immediately says, not hesitating one bit.
“No- I’m guessing Vinicius..” I say, eyes darting back to my laptop screen.
“I will be right- just watch..”
“It’s his second El Classico and his first in season one. What is he going-” I immediately stop talking when I notice a chance to score, my hands tangle into my shirt as I see how much space there is to score.
I gasp, and my jaw slacks open when Jude scores an absolute screamer, which I’d obviously never admit to him.
“I told you!” Luis screams, celebrating like it’s his birthday. I scoff, secretly happy we were put out of our 0-1 misery, and search for the draft I’m supposed to publish.
A couple minutes pass, it’s almost full time, and extra time is finally announced. The away side is full of Madridistas, all sitting on the edge of their seats until Luca kicks the ball towards Jude and GOAL!
The away side celebrates happily, with another El Classico win in our pocket. I quickly manage and do what I have to do, before we both get up to go back inside.
I was both delighted and annoyed at the fact that we won. Of course, it’s always amazing to win a match like this, especially when we were doing so well this season. Also because it’s Luca’s 500th match, and an assist is pretty amazing to pull off on a day like this.
The only thing making me have bitter feelings was the fact that I had to interview Jude today. Normally, Man Of The Match interviews with him were already horrific to experience. An elaborate interview with him, after I’d been avoiding him like the plague, wasn’t necessarily something I would want to do.
“Can you go first? I’ve got to pee really badly..” I say to Luis, placing my bag down and running towards the restroom. Finishing my business up quickly and washing my hands thoroughly.
I look around me for a bit, knowing that sometimes players would use these restrooms as well. I had heard about instances where the players of the opposite team had raged against our team’s staff members. Which definitely had me watching my back in moments like these.
I had interacted with some players of FC Barcelona, and they hadn’t been disrespectful so far.
Thus, I’m not too fazed when the door to the restroom opens. I look up as a sweaty and tired Ferran Tores walks in.
We make immediate eye contact, and I nod in greeting, shooting him a quick ‘hello' before pulling some paper towels from the dispenser to dry my hands.
He seems to be seething in anger, so I break eye contact, looking away.
“This is a staff bathroom, are you aware of that?”
He suddenly says, water splashing from the faucet as he begins washing his face.
“Sorry?” I question, wondering what he’s getting at.
“Not for girlfriends.” He mutters, turning the faucet off.
My face twists into one of confusion, the words throwing me for a loop. Seems like he notices, and he opens his mouth again.
“You’re Bellingham’s girl, aren’t you? This is the staff restroom.” He enunciates every single word as if I’m a kindergartner, it makes me freeze for a second.
I struggle to stop myself from reacting thoughtlessly, not knowing if I should be crying or laughing.
My hand reaches for my staff badge hanging from my neck, waving it in front of his face.
“Do I look like a girlfriend?” I ask, dropping my badge and stepping out before he can apologize.
Asshole, losing doesn’t give you the right to be so damn rude.
How could I even get rid of these stupid fucking rumors?
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“Okay, smile!” I exclaim, holding Luis’s camera up to take a photo of the squad. With the happiness of winning an El Classico and the celebration of Luca's milestone came a lot of excitement and enthusiasm.
I hold back a chuckle at the sight of Aurélien laying on the floor, instructing some of them to move a bit for a better shot.
We take multiple photos together, staff members taking photos with the squad while I force them to stand in front of the camera.
“y/n, come here, and we’ll take a picture!” Antonio urges, snatching the camera off of me and pushing me to stand in front of the camera.
I feel myself being pushed, until I find myself almost pressing into Jude’s side.
I curse to myself, forcing an awkward smile as I pose next to everyone.
“What? Surely, you don’t think I bite?” Jude whispers, his arm dropping to his side.
“Please, shut up and pose. We still have that interview, so don’t start now..” I mutter between a clenched smile, pretending I’m not fazed.
I hear a soft chuckle, a mocking and breathy ‘sure’ leaving his mouth.
It gives me shivers down my spine, and I fight the urge to step on his shoe, focusing on posing instead.
This will be a long, long interview..
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“You should’ve told me you’re leaving.” I mumble, mouth full of cereal and milk.
“Sorry, been so busy, didn’t even come to mind.” My dad says, walking around the house as he gets ready for work.
“Where is that blue tie I just got?” He shouts from his room.
“I ironed it! It’s in the bottom drawer!” I shout, scrolling through my messages.
“Got it!”
I hum, chugging the leftover milk in my bowl before standing up from the dining table.
“When are you going? Will you be gone for long?” I ask, watching him put the tie on in his bedroom.
“This weekend. It’s a crucial case, so I’ll be back when it’s totally over. Don’t get up to mischief. I know how you get when you’re home alone.” He points, giving me a stern look.
“Yeah, sure, I will plan a house party or two..” I joke, but it doesn’t land as he continues staring me down.
“Okay! I will be a responsible adult and call you or auntie Carmen when something happens..”
“Good, I’m leaving to get to work. Will you be back on time for dinner?” He says, grabbing his paperwork and laptop bag.
“Yeah, can we order in tonight?” I give him a pleading look, walking him out.
“You know I can’t deny my daughter happiness in the form of burgers and fries...”
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