#i love raising eggs im ngl

[prof-polaris]

I found this weird egg while on a walk I don't have any room for it so you can have it (Sets down a eevee egg)

oh!!

I've raised an eevee egg before, so no problems here!

I'll put it with Solaire so it keeps warm, first mission for the boy

[hatsukeii]

hi hatssun!! congrats on 900 followers!!

i would love to be on the guitar and bass with kageyama! i heard someone say "takes one to know one" in my in-ear monitor and prefer my “pining” guitar pick ;) thank you <3

nice! the band you've joined is...

lessons in love / bsf!kageyama tobio x reader

genre(s): angst in between bouts of fluff but this will be a very sweet fic methinks, lowkey found family, subtle but definitely pining, learning to love and learning to live!!!

warning(s): family issues smh, blood because kageyama is reckless and upset ngl, a smidge of depression/implied self-harm + suicidal ideation so pls be cautious! im basing those things off of what i've felt before so im trying not to romanticise it iykwim

wc: ~1.7k

your first gig is at… a waste yard?!

setlist:

🎵踊り子, vaundy

🎵lonely rhapsody, fuji kaze

🎵fake plastic trees, radiohead

Life leads Kageyama Tobio to a wasteland.

His feet kick at soda cans as he treks through mountains of thrown out televisions, yellowed mattresses, emptied beer bottles with the edges smashed open. His hand holds a baseball bat, yours carry along a skateboard. Leaves and paper crunch beneath your board as you jam it into the sooty ground ahead of a worn down Corvette. Once, a long time ago, it must have been the priceless possession of some young, fiery man. Now, it ages with him, alone and rusting through trials of life.

"The car? You sure?"

"Go on. Tell it what you want to." You egg him on, smacking your board into the ground once, twice. Tobio tosses the bat and catches it by the hilt, but his steps are shaky, careful as he approaches the hunk of metal. He raises it by his side, and slams it into the sideview mirror until it comes clean off with a snap. You watch him, hands pressing your board firm into the ground. Tobio is silent, even as he hammers and slashes and plows relentlessly into the rusted metal body of an unloved, unwanted Corvette. You imagine every crack in the car's windows carrying a little weight for him.

"I can't stand it here anymore."

Tobio gives the windshield one final blow, before the entire thing collapses into the cockpit of the car in chunks and shimmers of foggy glass. Frowning, his hands grab onto the frame, palms sinking into jagged shards of smashed window. He'll patch them up for volleyball, he thinks, but for now, he would rather watch them bleed for tonight. His feet push off the bumper, hands pushing further into the glass as he swings himself onto the roof of the car. He lies his head down on his bloodied palms, hair poking into fresh wounds. You sigh, tossing your unused skateboard to the side, and push yourself onto the trunk of the car, standing over Tobio's head.

"You're actually insane, you know? Dragging me out here so I can assault a car." He stares at the sky. The moon cowers behind grey clouds tonight, billions of stars following suit. The only star he sees is hovering above his face, but he's too busy trying not to wince at the stench of his blood oozing into his hair.

"Takes one to know one, Tobio. You fucked it up real good."

He sits up, pushing himself to the side and leaving bloody handprints on the off-white roof of the car. You press your hand onto the cool metal , swinging one leg over. Your boot lands on Tobio's stomach, and he doubles over before falling limp again. A second leg follows up, slinging itself onto the first. His eyes flicker from the sky to your seated figure, legs sprawled across his body, a fallen star in a barren wasteland. If his palms weren't bloodied and battered tonight, he'd lift you back up into the sky and away from the abyss that is himself. You deserve at least that much.

"Need to get away from here." He mumbles into the air, wisps of cold puffing from his mouth.

Your legs shift, one bent for your boot to rest between his legs, the other lying comfortably across his knee. Swallowing thickly, he lolls his head to the side, the corner of his eye catching the way your hair falls loose from behind your ear when you turn to look at him. If his hands weren't stinging like hell behind his head, he would push it back to see you properly. His eyes train onto nothing in particular, melancholic. Tired. You click your tongue and reach over to pinch his earlobe, a pinch that tells him, hey, I'm still here. You're still here. We can stay forever if you'd like. Once an odd quirk of yours turned a habit that seems to ground Tobio every time he feels the dull ache. You've done it so much that he's memorised the swirls etched into the pads of your fingers just by the feeling of them pressed against his ears.

"Hey, y/n."

"Yeah?"

"Do you think I have it in me to live?"

You gasp, feigning hurt as your hand shoots up to your chest. Yet in your mind, you do not want to talk about this, because you have no answer for him. So, you hope that Tobio laughs at you. He doesn't. Instead, he pushes himself upright on his elbows, palms facing the air. The blood has dried and clotted now, streaks of reddish-brown slashing across the pale skin of his hands.

"Live?"

"Yeah, like really live."

He stops to think, eyes rolling to stare at the blank sky, devoid of stellar or lunar presence. His eyes dart around to draw into the clouds, two people sitting atop a Corvette that has expended its time, legs tangled betwen each other, minds connected by brain waves unseen by each other, but so very present nevertheless. Two minds so detached from the rest of the world, from fighting parents that storm into different rooms at midnight, from the horrors that have made their marks in their chests, their heads, their ears, their eyes too. Two wandering souls that bumped into each other on a school rooftop by chance one day, one learning to live, the other living as if tomorrow was not guaranteed.

"I'm still alive, for what it's worth. What makes you think you can't?"

Tobio looks back to you, and it's almost like he's back on that school rooftop a year ago. The rooftop where the wind howls and whistles, no matter how low he crouches behind the barriers to breathe. The rooftop where you pinched his ear for the first time, and he didn't even know your name. Now, he knows where you head to when nights of muffled screaming from downstairs become ringing in your ears, and how you like your breakfast on the mornings that you jog to his house when dewdrops form on leaves at dusk, usually after sleeping through the night in a Corvette at a waste disposal. You know the recurring nightmare that plagues his waking dreams, the one where his toss hits an empty court, his teammates huddled outside the lines, and the anxiety that eats at his very being, fear that he will never really learn how to live freely, to spread his wings and take off.

"I have nothing but volleyball. I don't know if anyone really cares for me outside of that. Except you, probably. Which is weird already."

"What's so weird about that? I think I love you anyways." You freeze at your casual confession, holding your breath. Then you decide that it's not worth it, and breathe out. Tobio stares, the thought of what you have just said being true is inconceivable. Heavy breaths line the silent air, your chests heave at the same pace, and he thinks that maybe your bodies are connected in some capacity too.

"You think?"

"Don't exactly have a good reference to go by now, do I?"

Tobio can't bring himself to nod. The idea that you've chosen to consider loving him, of all people, is frightening. The prospect of you choosing to stay in this abyss alongside him, refusing to go back amongst the stars, where you belong, is gut wrenching. Why? Why stay here? All he knows is volleyball. He can't even figure out how he wants to exist. There's so much waiting ahead for you, beyond the dysfunctional family, and the wasteland, and the Corvette. A youth of dancing on top of cars, and watching planes fly by from grassy fields, and chats of last night's dinner instead of last night's nightmare. So much that he knows someone else could give you, maybe even better than he can. You puff your cheeks, and blow a raspberry at his silence, before he finally breaks it.

"Why me?"

"Why not?"

"Because I'm awful?"

"You're just learning to live, like everyone else. That doesn't make you awful. That doesn't stop me from loving you either."

"You've gotta stop saying that, man." You raise your eyebrow at his request, heart sinking to your stomach.

"What, that I love you? Does that scare you?" He shakes his head, and you only just notice the faint pink that lines his cheeks. The clouds above thin out, the glow of the moon is diffused, but finally there nevertheless. His bloodied palm tucks the fallen strands of hair behind your ear, tracing over the curve tentatively. He wants to learn you all over again.

"It scares me. But it excites me. It excites me to like, no end." His fingers ghost across your neck, gliding over your pulse. This feels like the real thing, he wonders if you know when you smile back at him.

"Good. That's what it feels like to live."

You reach for his hand, feeling the cuts and gashes in his palm when you press your own to his. He links his fingers with yours, and sets your hands back on the cold metal of the Corvette. Then, he pushes forward to you, pressing his lips against yours for just a second. This tastes like the real thing, and Tobio hopes that by the way you pull him back in, you know it too. His other hand snakes around to your back, pushing you impossibly close to him. You don't let him go until your lungs are shrivelled discs, begging for air. And even then, you hold his forehead against yours, and breathe against his lips, cupid's bows still touching. His eyes are lidded, staring at the puffs of white that don't stop coming from your mouths.

"Yeah, I think I love you too." His confession sends shivers down your spine, shivers that are caught by his hand on your back, his fingers against yours on the roof of a car, and his lips on yours again.

Life leads Kageyama Tobio to a wasteland. Love leads him into the night sky, right beside you instead.

author's note:

this is an apology and a fulfilment of a promise for ave because yeah ushijima HURT you but im about to pull you back out of it bb<3 have yourself a wonderful angsty fluff pining hurt/comfort found family learning to live learning to love fic i love you also i hope it's angsty enough because i think i went the found family route a little too much so it's not explicitly sad but it's more like melancholic iykwim

off topic but i haven't gone so heavy on like mental turmoil in my writing since forever but i hope that what i've written here is realistic(?) i personally have dealt with most things i wrote here so im not worried about being weird and romanticising awful things but i need to like just clarify LOL

anyways tags!!

@chuuya-brainrot @hiraethwa @catsoupki @staraxiaa @fiannee @akaakeis @4ngelfries @wyrcan @kuroppiii @bailey-reeds

interested in joining a band? come on over to the build-a-band 900 !!

[bubblesxo]

i dont know if you will see this but i am a big fan of your g!bruce meets the batfam!!!! I literally have tumblr just for this series (and now that I’ve tried it im beginning to love it ngl) . Annyywaayy ive just read the new chapter and it’s so good!?? Like i am really excited for the next chapter!!!

Oh and I haven’t watched gotham ( im planning too ) but i sometimes mix the twins????? Like your explanations are good dont get me wrong but yk when your reading and you need to check which ones which? Yeah … and like i want to fix that idk how .do i just like memorize the twins personalitys??

also in this au is theres 2 jokers??????? I saw you once mention Jerome(?) being revived or something

ps .im that great at English sorry .

oh wow wow wow thank you so so much!! i'm really glad that you're enjoying my story so much! it really means a lot to me. <33 i think your english is good! but if you need/want me to clarify anything i say here, just let me know and i'll try to rephrase it for you!

okay, so in the Gotham tv show (this has spoilers for all 5 seasons, so read on if you're okay with that) the way that they approached writing the joker was actually really up in the air in the beginning. this is because they didn't have the rights to use the name "joker," and so fox (the company that made the show) planned on making a bunch of smaller characters in the show as a kind of easter egg as people who could be the joker or who resemble him in some way.

this changed when cameron monaghan (the actor for both jerome and jeremiah) guest starred in s1e16 "the blind fortune teller." in it, the character of jerome is introduced as a 17/18 year old boy who travels with the circus with his mother, who is a snake dancer. he is meant to be one of the aforementioned joker-like characters in the show and wasn't actually supposed to be included again after that episode, if i am not mistaken.

however, the viewers LOVED his performance and jerome came back in season two as a member of the maniax, a group of arkham inmates who were broken out of the asylum. i won't go too into detail about the actual plot, but in seasons two, three, and four, jerome shows up in at least a few different episodes with very memorable storylines each time.

it isn't until season four of the show that jeremiah is even revealed at all! jeremiah and jerome are identical twin brothers, however, jeremiah has been in hiding for years under the fake name "xander wilde" in an attempt to escape jerome, who wants to get revenge on him for lying to their mother about what he (jerome) did when they were children. basically, jeremiah lied to their mother (lila, who jerome is revealed to have killed in 1x16) that jerome tried to kill him, causing jeremiah to be sent away and be adopted by rich people and get to go to a well-funded private school where he could live out his best life as a child prodigy (which was jeremiah's end goal to this), whereas jerome was left behind in the circus that they lived at (haly's circus, the same one that dick grayson later was raised in before being adopted by bruce). during this time, jerome was horrifically abused by his mother, his uncle, and his mother's many romantic partners. this eventually caused him to crack, which creates the character we see in the show.

here's an easy way to remember the difference in their personalities:

in the standard american deck of cards, there are two jokers: one that is black and white and one that is in color. in this analogy, jeremiah is the black and white joker and jerome is the one in color.

this is jerome:

he's got a *very* boisterous personality. he's outgoing and charismatic and, of course, severely messed up in the head. he *enjoys* the pain he causes people and does it with little to no reservations. he thinks things through less thoroughly than jeremiah but jerome always has a plan and is actually quite smart. i couldn't do him the disservice of calling him the dumb twin, despite some points about jeremiah that i'll get back to later.

anyway, jerome has a grand plan for all of gotham: he believes that, fundamentally, everyone in the world is like him and is also at least a bit crazy inside. he wants everyone to tap into their inner selves and let themselves run free / go crazy. he successfully ensnares huge hoards of gothamites with his persuasive way of speaking and interesting flare to his words. he amasses a large cult following, all of whom are very similar to him in the sense that they all demonstrate similar signs of instability.

here's some more gifs of him.

jerome kind of invented the iconic "HAHAHA" signature joker laugh in the gotham universe, even though he isn't the one who goes on to become "mr. j" (gotham's version of the joker) in the end (that's jeremiah, though i have a lot to say about that).

jerome's always smiling, a genuinely creepy smile that throws people off at first but can be really scary once you know what you're looking at. he single handedly turns gotham into a madhouse on multiple occasions and is the one who basically spread the "crazy" to the general population (for short: genpop).

he's a classic cult leader in the sense that he can mesmerize a whole room with his magnetic presence but also will ruthlessly cut down any of his followers if they so much as upset him (or even if they're just being annoying or could have a greater purpose, like when he stabbed a follower in the gut to take their blood to draw a frowney-face on bruce).

that reminds me, another important thing to know about jerome is that he has an iconic stapled-on face! this is because he died once (in season two, though he came back to life for season three onwards) and one of his followers tried to revive him using some insider medical knowledge from doctor hugo strange (who is just... a whole thing. ew.). he thinks that he failed at doing this and steals jerome's face so that he can wear it on television in an attempt to control jerome's followers (spoiler: this doesn't work).

however, it turns out that jerome *was* revived from this, and he's pretty upset that some dude stole his face! so he uses a staple gun to re-attach it after he gets it back (and kills the guy who did it). his face is later punched off by jim gordon but reattached more properly during his time at arkham afterward (the carnival scene happened in season 3 and jerome came back with a kind-of healed face in season 4).

here's some gifs with jerome's messed up face!

jerome is the colorful joker because he's very much expressive. he lets out every single emotion he feels---unless he's trying to deceive someone, at which point he is a phenomenal liar. (in season 1 when we are first introduced to him, he almost successfully gets away with the murder of his own mother.)

jerome is funny and laughs a lot and is *loud.* he's also absolutely insane and incredibly cruel, as well as impulsive, but he's able to curb his instincts if he feels like he can pull off a big plan.

jerome is a showman by nature. he's a product of the circus and it *shows.* everything he does is like an act, something that is acknowledged by many people in the show.

he's a funky lil dude. totally crazy, but kind of adorable at times.

he's also SEVERELY traumatized from his horrible past and has huge trust issues.

so, yeah. jerome is colors! remember that.

unfortunately, pookie died in season 4 and doesn't seem to have been revived this time </3

now, onto his twin brother jeremiah!

jeremiah is, at least at first, presented to be the complete opposite of jerome. he's calm, collected, and seemingly sane---at least at first. bruce trusts him at first and he even befriends him for a period of time before jeremiah betrays him.

jeremiah is a genius engineer, and, when looking into his past, we can assume that he was a child prodigy. he worked with thomas wayne before he died and designed the wayne plaza building under the aforementioned alias "xander wilde." he also locked himself in an underground maze for ~6 years (i believe?) and never went outside, instead sending his proxy (ecco) out to act in his place during business transactions.

as seen here, jeremiah seems to be the complete opposite of showboat jerome:

when we first meet jeremiah, we are told that he is totally sane, but we can later see that this is not the complete truth.

i'll use jeremiah's project as a metaphor for this. jeremiah was building a set of generators which could make energy harvesting and usage much less expensive and much more bio-friendly (if i remember correctly). bruce promised to fund his project and jeremiah accepts his offer quickly.

after jerome dies in season 4 after kidnapping bruce and jeremiah, he left behind a concoction of chemicals that seemingly make jeremiah go insane. this is a play on joker toxin / joker venom from the greater dc universe.

however, after jeremiah reveals his new self

he says that the spray did not actually change who he actually is, but just gave him an altered appearance. there are a lot of fan theories about this, but the general consensus is that the spray likely lowered his inhibitions, which gave him the kick needed to reveal his true self.

even his complexion resembles the joker he corresponds with: black and white. he is the black and white joker because he isn't as expressive, is way more calculated, and is more cruel and less happy. even his skin is paper white.

here's some gifs of what he looks like after those "slight cosmetic changes" :

that looks a lot more like the joker we know and love today, right? bleach-pale skin, red painted lips, green hair. he's instantly recognizable as the stereotypical joker now.

remember when i mentioned the generators? let's go back to them. the entire time that the generators have been around, they've also been perfectly functional as powerful bombs. their ability to be used as bombs does not undermine the fact that they can also be used as generators, and both of these things were true at the same time *for the entire time they have existed.*

it is in this way that jeremiah's paradoxical nature has always existed. jeremiah is crafty, cunning, and absolutely vicious. he has no care or concern for human life in general and will sacrifice most people in his life if it means that he will get what he wants in the end.

this is shown both before and after the joker toxin in how he lied about jerome when they were children (which caused jerome to be heavily abused) and in how jeremiah willingly killed one of his most devoted and beloved followers, who was being ransomed, just because someone put him on hold and it was personally easier for him to just kill him than sit on hold on the phone for a while. (he also has a vicious streak, though, because he immediately moved the demolition of the bombs up to immediately once he was out of the blast zone because those people inconvenienced him.)

something that's important to realize about jeremiah is that he has an issue with being called crazy. jerome does, too, but he eventually comes to accept the term, almost like he's reclaiming it, but jeremiah is *violently* against it. that's one of the things that set him off in the previously mentioned interaction.

both jeremiah and jerome are obsessed with bruce, though in different ways. jeremiah sees bruce first as his best friend and later as the "brother [he] could never have, that jerome could never be." jerome just sees bruce as a particularly entertaining and interesting kid who he enjoyed tormenting who he would eventually kill.

anyway, despite jeremiah being crazy (or, depending on who you ask, just less inhibited) he is still crazy smart and calculating. he thinks through everything before he does it and his master plans seem like they go on forever with 10000 parts to them and backups and contingencies galore.

the only time that jeremiah ever really seems to break out of this is when he's fighting with bruce. while he still does have a greater point to make or something he's trying to accomplish, he thinks through things less with him and shows his impulsive and rash side a bit more, which is interesting because jerome showed his thoughtful and contemplative side when faced with the obstacle that is bruce thomas wayne. i love parallels and contrasts, especially in these two characters! i just love writing about twins, they're always so interesting.

some important things about their relationship to one another:

even though jerome kidnapped jeremiah and seemingly strapped a bomb to his neck (after breaking into his house and telling him that he would kill him), jerome doesn't seem to actually want jeremiah to die. instead, as we later find out, he wants jeremiah to unleash his true self and carry on his legacy of chaos and cruelty in gotham for him after his death. this is why he left behind the laughing gas for him.

(the fact that jerome thought to do all of that shows that he really was a smart character and that he truly did understand the world around him well. he knew exactly what would happen in the event of his death, i.e. bruce offering to fund jeremiah's work and jeremiah accepting, as is shown when jerome has the joker venom in a present box which claims to be sent from wayne enterprises.)

jeremiah *hates* to be compared to jerome in any way, as he thinks of himself as "the face of true sanity." he actually has an entire notebook full of jerome's ideas, which he says he will outdo and perfect, thus defeating his brother in the end, which i don't know if i agree with, but whatever.

i think that it's because of the reputation that jerome got at the circus. jeremiah wanted people to think of him as better than jerome and as the perfect child, which he succeeded at. to him, jerome is synonymous with crazy, which i've already mentioned that he hates to be called.

okay, just one more part to talk about. the infamous, much anticipated Mr. J!!!

in the series finale, it is revealed that jeremiah, after falling into a vat of acid, is horribly disfigured and pretends to be in a vegetative state for the whole ten years that bruce is on his quest to improve himself before becoming batman. he does this as a way of waiting for bruce to come back to gotham so he can continue to be obsessed with him.

however, though this is jeremiah, it seems that he has actually gone through immense mental trauma sometime during this time (perhaps during his fall into a vat of chemicals), which has caused him to sort of lose his sense of self. he once says that there was "another me" [another him] once, which is, of course, referring to jerome. this implies that jeremiah sees jerome as an extension of himself, almost, and almost makes it seem as if mr. j is a whole different entity of his own.

hopefully this clears everything up a bit for you!! let me know if you have any questions or want to know anything specific about the characters and i will be glad to oblige!

thank you once again for being so kind as to leave this ask!! it really made my day. thank you for enjoying my fic, i hope it continues to live up to expectations. i have a lot of fun things planned (and i am very happy that you decided to look into these characters more, because they are actually extremely important to the plot as we get more into the actual story!). <33

[melancholysway]

TMNT Bop or Flop

Feel free to join me in this bc I'm bored af and im trying to start all the requests i have :")

this is also a slight smash or pass bc I'm bored also- however I'm not doing it with TMNT 2012- that's just wrong LMAO or rise TMNT- self-explanatory. 2003/Bayverse/2007 is fair game though yall!

TMNT 2003

Leonardo

Ngl... a bit of a flop but a bop lowkey .

I liked him when he was starting to be more carefree and not so into the whole being perfect and leader thing ...

if this was smash or pass... SMASH IDC

Idk yall something about this Leo makes me happy in a weird way, so maybe half bop half flop? a blop?

Raphael

MAJOR BOP ALERT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ah yes a man who loves animals I'm here for it

I also really love his accent in this wtf .

He's a bop b/c he fought blind once, GTFOHHHHH!! and he ain't afraid of SHIT!

pass btw if this was smash or pass, he seems like a cool friend to have tho!

Donatello

BOP! His sassiness hasn't peaked in this version but it's very much there . 2003 Donnie is actually so sweet yall. Plus, his voice is very nice to listen to! I would love for him to read me a long book aloud as a bedtime story <3

smashbtw

Michelangelo

the man makes a mean scrambled egg according to Raph, but I make it better. FLOP.

I can't put my finger on it, but I just didn't enjoy this Mikey as much as I did in other versions. He made me wanna punch him sometimes . Also would notttt shutup about being the battle nexus champion like boy if you don't shut yo ass up-

pass pass pass pass btw

TMNT 2007

Leonardo

MAJOR. FUCKING. FLOP.

I don't care what yall mfs say, he was way too mf serious, and even said he was better than Raph??? I don't know exactly what he dealt with during that training in South America, but it changed him man.

He tried too fucking quick to bring the team back together, and that's why him and Raph had a falling out and a big fight. Raph knew it was wrong of Leo to try and waltz in again in their lives and be Fix-It-Felix bro.

sidenote: Mega SMASH. That "come to daddy" quote????? He knew wtf he was doin with that. He's too mf fine to be actin the way he was actin in this movie LMAO- I still really enjoy this Leo though, if they made a sequel like it was intended, I would probably change it to a bop, but I need more scenes of 2007 Leo/ this design of Leo to do this !

Raphael

Do I even have to say it????

BOP. BOP BOP BOP! BOP BOP BOP TO THE MF TOP YALL!

By far my FAVORITE Raph in the entire franchise! I love it, he's at his peak rebellion, and even made a name for himself fighting crime, I love it.

I also LIVE for his Brooklyn accent. I also hc if we got more screentime of him in the sequel, he'd be the most chill turtle. I believe there's a deleted scene of him talking to Leo at the end of the movie, and his tone/mannerisms were very mellow. 2007!Raph is mad chill

Also gave 2007 Leo a run for his money bro-

SIDENOTE: SMASHHHHHH! HULK SMASH IDC CALL ME WILD BUT IDC . Whoever designed him needs a raise. His eyes??? gtofh.

Donatello

Ngl...a slight flop?

he's not as sassy in this version, and I love me some sassy Donnie.

Like Leo, I really wish he got more screentime, I do love him challenging Raph in the beginning of the movie though :) Go Donnie go!

There's a deleted scene of Donnie and Splinter, it's called "let him eat cake" on youtube I believe- he would've been a bop if they kept that scene in! I feel like there was a lack of Donnie scenes in this- but I like that this movie was focused on Raph so I can't complain.

In a deleted scene it reveals Donatello loves money, he's also a flop bc he takes Mikey's money away so he can't buy dumb shit for the lair, at least let the man keep more than a $5 ya know?

ahem...smash.

Michelangelo

BOP! surprised? don't be.

he's a single mom that works one job who loves his brothers and never stops

with gentle hands and a heart of a fighter

he's a survivor <3

i also feel bad that he gets beat up by kids :( he really be providing for his family fr fr. He really out and about making his coin as a turtle in a turtle suit. he also started his own business??? got his own slogan, and is a kids party host??? like okay support small business xoxo

erm...pass btw, I just cannot see Mikey that way yall.

TMNT 2012

Leonardo

BIGGEST BOP OF THE CENTURY! This version of Leonardo is my all time favorite. He even beats Rise Leo by a few! I can't explain it, but this Leonardo- the first one we see that's more upbeat and not so serious, I loved it! They gave him interests other than training or being a leader- they gave him a love for a show he devotes his time to! be fuckin fr.

Also played tea time with some random ass lil girl, it was so cute. I loved to see Leo be put in situations where he's just being him.

So yes this is very biased but idc, he's my fave. One thing about 2012 Leo he gon get to the bag no matter what.

He also literally SLAYED Shredder and brought his head! OFF WITH HIS HEAD!!!

Raphael

Do I need to say anything?

Bop, wanna know why?

HIS ONE-LINERS. He's so in tune with his sarcasm and wits that it's so satisfying to hear some sarcastic shit come out his mouth.

May even be a bit sassy, he has no time for bullshit. will beat some ass- and is the best pet dad.

no bc when he was being a foster dad to Chompy??? my heart. my fucking heart yall.

Also the fact that he named him Chompy Picasso? PLS.

Donatello

Bop guys!

Lowkey gets bullied by Raph but makes up for it by making him look dumb at times.

SASSIER. VERY SASSY. WIll point out his brothers (Raph/Mikey's) stupidity.

Plus his gap is so cute

Also, he's a bop because he made fucking RETRO MUTAGEN. If I'm not mistaken, 2012 Donnie is the first one of his installments to make a retro mutagen.

Okay maybe Mikey mixed a chemical or two and was the original creator of the retro mutagen, but Donnie was able to make copies of it after finding out how Mikey made it.

Michelangelo

BOP BOP BOP

He might be my favorite Mikey! I really like 2007 Mikey bc his comedic timing was on point, but this Mikey! Oh my god his timing is fucking terrible and I love it.

he's also the reason why his brothers aren't in the stomachs of those big-ass wasps, he's underrated! When he applies himself, he's unstoppable fr.

Also, he's an animal lover like Raph! He also really cares for Ice Cream Kitty (IC Kitty is also one of my fave characters for some reason they're sooo cute!)

BAYVERSE TMNT

Leonardo

Hear me out.

Blop.

I know, why isn't he just a bop or why isn't he just a flop? I honestly couldn't decide. I found that he wasn't the most memorable in this version, but he did certain things that I remembered. He also has cute blue eyes so that's why he's a blop.

I didn't like the way he talked to Raph in the second movie bro, he was such a bitch, then acted mad shocked that Raph went out and tried to get the ooze himself. he also benched tf out of Raph and Mikey just because Raph called him out on his shit.

Okay I'm changing it- he's a blop but VERY close to being a flop because of that.

all this being said...pass.

Raphael

He's mad chill. A fuckin Bop. Honestly, all Raph's are bops, but this one especially. He knits yall. KNITS. Raph KNITS. I never thought I'd see the day.

Also a Vin Diesel stan, I love that for him.

They also gave him a fear of heights...or erm...skydiving, which I thought was kinda cute! Big bad Raph is scared of a plane dive!

P.S- smashy smash. he's truly a sweetheart yall.

Donatello

I actually really like his design! Love the glasses on him fr fr!

This Donnie is a blop though...sorry guys.

He was very nerdy in this one, but I'm so used to Donnie being a sass king that it didn't feel normal.

I wish they gave him more substance than just the genius of the team, if this makes any sense. Same with 2007!Donnie.

Blop positive: he's the only turtle to curse in the movie! he also snorts. it's cute.

Sadly...pass.

but, if they made him sassy as FUCK- ALL MIGHT DEKU SMASH.

Michelangelo

BOPPITY BOP

he's mad cool i dont see anything wrong with him. He's just a bro.

i dont have much to say about bayverse Mikey for some reason, so I'll leave it at this.

He also calls April "Angelcakes" which I think is cute yall-

Pass btw

RISE!TMNT

Leonardo

Final boss level BOP BRO. I love love love this Leo! He's amazing. I have no complaints fr.

Total asshole in the lair olympics but I loved every second of it LMFAO

also his granny disguise to spy on April??? 10/10 great style. It's nice to see Leo not be the leader for once, I truly see what he could be when he doesn't carry the burden of the leader.

Raphael

Okay, I'm used to hothead/soft Raph, but this Raph?! MF BOP! HE'S FINALLY GETTING THE UNOFFICIAL LEADERSHIP ROLE HE DESERVES.

He's a big mf softie, and I love it! I love his design, everything! No complaints about this Raph, he finally is able to show his leadership skills!

spoiler all rise! turtles are bops bc its so nice to see them written differently than their usual stereotypes.

Donatello

I absolutely adore this version of Donnie! His lines are absolutely top tier bro.

HIS RAP IN MYSTIC LIBRARY??? GTFOH. I also really loved his rivalry with Leo in the olympics btw .

He has so many golden moments that this is exactly why hes a BOP! BOP OF THE MF UNIVERSE.

He's also unintentionally funny, his computer password??? yeah bro he's funny.

Michelangelo

BOP. I finally feel like Mikey isn't the butt of the joke anymore. All boys are funny in this series in their own way, and they're all shown being a little dumb so I love that LMAO

I love that Mikey is still childish, but it seems to do toned down as his brothers are equally childish in some way

We don't rely on Mikey for comedic relief, we can rely on him to be sporadic and chaotic though! i love this version of Mikey, this one is my favorite. Point blank my fave!

Masterlist

[m1ckeyb3rry]

HAHAHAH imagine the first chapter of pursuit starts with “I wanna be the very best that no one ever was, to rizz then is my real test, to date them is my causeeeee” LMFAOO

LMAOO you forgetting but you also being the one to make his team sends me (i would so do this) ASH AND CHARIZARD I love that dynamic that would be so funny imagine it’s just lazy on lazy hate crimes like “no bitch you move and do it” “no im sleeping”

Even before remembering the setting I thought Charles matched the YIPPEE vibe well LOL WAIT RINS IS FUNNY HAHSAHAHAH “yippee.” NAGIS EGO LEAVING HIM LIKE HIS SOUL IS ASCENDING TO ANOTHER PLANE HE LOOKED ETHEREAL

LMAOOO Karasu has beef with her now yes whenever you have doodles do show!! Obv no pressure to make any LOL I just love seeing the crumbs

Wait lowk Barou yayoi spinoff this angst…/hj barous and karasus>>> on that note I had to remember that reader doesn’t inherit the Barou last name because when I looked at the funeral graphic I was like wait do we need to distinguish which one and then I remembered the whole cousin thing and also how cousins don’t always share the same last name but anyways NOOOSHSJS IM CRYING JN MY FEELS “my ex sending my brother the love he could never give me” goodbye (lowk the move from romantic to platonic love makes this even deeper bruh I wasn’t planning on sobbing rn)

DAYCARE WORKWR KARASU WAITTTT esp if his talonflsme has flame body (if I get pokemon teams wrong do correct me because I think the team listing got buried somewhere and I have bad memory as we’ve established) lowk I like this idea too it’s like he’s proving himself to yayoi but not limiting himself to just the gym leader like breaking the mold yk…..just makes him more extraordinary (in his terms LMAO) like proving himself without needing to be gym leader…..im ngl I jumped to far and read “he cooks eggs” and I was like he does WHAT but anyways

OH LMFAOAO I somehow thought there was a specific meme so I looked it up to no avail but REAL and LMAOOOO DOOFENSHMIRTZ(spelling??? Idk man)

HAHAH no it’s ok they can take the slander (i always find it really funny how even Nagi himself is like this shorty…in ref to Isagi HAHA and ig by implication Reo since he doesn’t really disagree when Nagi calls Isagi that) THE BIG HANDS imagine they do that thing where you measure hand sizes oh god but also one slap from them and you’re stepping into your grave LMFAO (they would never but ykwim)

STOP MIRAVERSE MUKTIVERSE (im abbreviating this to MVMV/MMV) actually goes too hard it all fits too well within the pokemon au SHSHSH white butterfly Hiori and reader him waiting at the safari zone in the house she described raising the pokemon she listed from her childhood dreams bye…now instead of white butterflies white butterfree/beautifly (I can’t lie im a beautifly enthusiast so id pick that over butterfree but wtv floats your boast yk just needs to be a butterfly)

IM GONNA SHIT MYSELF THE TABIEITA ONE IS TOO FUNNY but IVE SEEN THE SAE ONE LMAOAOA finally accurate rep of him omg wait I’m gonna go stalk this artist more I didn’t realize they drew tabieita

LMAOO me rn thinking I’ve said one too many LMAOs and tossing in LOL and HAHAHA (I lowk hate hahaha because it HAS to be in caps or else it looks passive aggressive unless I do like four “ha”s or more but that looks excessive ughhhhhh) in too deep we’re entering my LMAO keyboard smash zone now (I’ve sometimes sandwiched sentences with LMAO too) but enough about my LMAOs

LMFAOAOOOOOOOOO IM DEADDDDD imagine we’ve been talking about peregrine this entire time and I’m just like “WOW she knows all the details about the whole plot does she know the author??” Isagis life is too boring he needs angst to spice it up fr wait I love how Isagi kinda projects Barou into reader and struggles with his loss/disappearance you made him like 10x more interesting in like two seconds damn….QHESTIONING IF THE WRONG ONE GOT TO LIVE omg that goes HARD I love complex feelings like this go off!!! Barou’s death fr doing numbers on everyone like talk about catastrophe of a lifetime (wait side note but this almost kinda parallels MLP and how the mane six get their cutie marks like one event tied them together forever and ig in this case it’s Barou’s death?? SHSHSHS don’t ask me why I made this connection)

Karasu bfb about to be the household Karasu fic trust but no fr there’s no way I’d be able to tell from reading the request prompted fics like if we weren’t talking I would’ve just thought you liked a bunch of characters LMAOO

WAIT WHAT I HAVENT STUDJED YET I paused writing this and scrambled to check ok thank god it’s not up quite yet I need to type faster omfg but RAGGHHH POKEMON THEME LETS GOOO wait on that note would you prefer to write something for a fav or not or are there any characters you aren’t as inclined to write for atm because if so I’ll keep it in mind while deciding because I’m indecisive so (imagine I say Isagi /j I wouldn’t prefer that anyways) good thing I’m in my chronically online hours rn and saw this

- KARASU ANON that wasn’t supposed to be all caps but I’m too lazy to fix it now oops

HELPPPP THE NOT THE THEME SONG (AIKU'S VERSION) SDLKFJHSLDKJ i'm crying omg there needs to be an aiku spinoff that's just him and his arbok spreading rizz and pokémon knowledge HAHAHA

LMAOO besides arcanine whimsicott and reuniclus i feel like nagi's team is kinda irrelevant in terms of our discussions...goodra does get mentions every now and again plus it's SO nagi that i remember that one but rip clefable and snorlax forever second place HAHA that's the exact vibe i was imagining or like reader throws out her gyarados in a battle so nagi whips out snorlax for some reason and snorlax is just sleeping meanwhile nagi's like "BRO IT'S Y/N WE HAVE TO LOCK IN" but snorlax does NOT gaf FKLJHKLSF

all of the foreign/professional players knowing one another is so fun tbh reader in that au definitely would team up with charles to bully kaiser when they play bm so he def fits!! or imagine rin has to get internet culture lessons from shidou and charles so he can keep up with reader's references but he's so unenthusiastic about it so he brings zero energy to the table (his first choice in tutors was karasu but he can't ask karasu for help because karasu's his biggest opp since reader likes him/is friends with him)

KARASU HAS INSANE BEEF WITH EVERYONE IN THE CORE FOUR i actually can't decide why he'd have beef with tullia because she's...not unproblematic necessarily but too focused on bullying otoya to do anything to karasu HAHAH maybe he has beef with her because she beat him in a battle when they first met (four baby birds vs a fully grown lanturn is not a great combo) and he never gets over it (it's mostly like a joke grudge he holds ofc but he would be the one)

no because i've been thinking about barou x yayoi (baroi?? shoyoi?? i'd say barasu but that could get confusing as a ship name because of tabito)...they kind of give mrs l/n x toji vibes from pomegranate ink but opposite!! okay but yk how we have reader and co and it's reader + tullia + karasu + otoya well imagine barou's group was himself, yayoi (who had to do on field training before her parents gave her the gym), isagi, and then aiku occasionally dropping in (aiku serving more of a manshine trio vibe than anything tbh) KLSJFDS the angst there goes INSANE okay wait lowkey isagi and yayoi reunion could go crazy maybe they haven't spoken since barou left because they don't know what to say to each other and isagi's avoiding her because barou told him about his illness but not yayoi and the guilt of that is crushing to isagi (love triangle dare i say?? yayosagi canon because barou's gone??????)

yess he has a talonflame w flame body that's actually where i got the idea of him and the birds looking after (NOT cooking) the eggs!! honestly i think it would be cute too like after beating yayoi and getting her badge as well as being at reader's side when she takes down team x he realizes he doesn't NEED to prove anything to anyone ykwim?? like as long as he's happy it's okay if people consider his existence "mediocre" (because i'm sure people would find it crazy that he goes to be a daycare worker/owner when he could very easily be a league official) because nothing lese really matters...character growth/development we love to see it

HAHAH no there's no specific meme unfortunately but the doofenshmirtz cracked me up so ofc i had to share (lowkey i can imagine otoya in that fit SDJFHSDL)

no because reo calls bachira a banged freak those two are BOTH evil reo is just more outwardly nice so nobody knows what insults he has brewing in him LMAOOO omg isagi is like one of the shortest in bllk besides kurona and kiyora so ig calling him shorty isn't necessarily off the mark (chigiri's a little taller than him but that one low quality panel of the manshine trio where chigiri looks tiny next to reo and nagi cracks me up HAHA)...nah because if i ever got to compare hand sizes with karasu or barou i would BUST i feel like barou wouldn't even understand what it so he's just like "uh ok" if you ask but you KNOW karasu is 100% aware of it he'd be so smug too LMAOOO once again in the words of isagi "this guy...is a villain!" or wtvr he said

MIRAVERSE MULTIVERSE IS REAL wait kalos doesn't have beautifly (they have butterfree) imagine the beautifly when they were kids was just one of yayoi's many gym pokémon that happened to be out and about BUT once he gets the safari zone hiori puts in a special request to have beautifly placed there because of that specific meeting SLDFKJD too many possibilities fr

THE SAE ONE HAD ME CACKLING THE WAY HE PASSES CHIGIRI TOO truly the sae the world needs...the tabieita one was so silly but so them HAHA sadly i am typing this from my laptop (hence the zero emojis too) so no tik tok this time around but next time trust i will lock in (call me nagi battling reader fr) and send smth!!

PLS i always throw in either an LMAOO or a HAHAH or a key smash to break up my trains of thought or the classic...or the !! and ?? because i feel like normal punctuation makes it feel sm more formal like a business professional email or smth when we're literally just besties giggling and chatting yk

I'M CRYING THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT i was like didn't i show you the drafts of earlier chapters did you think i just pulled those out of my ass??? haven't you seen my masterlist before?? but anyways i get what you were saying now HAHA

no because i have this vivid vision of isagi snapping and going full on-field on reader and she gets upset/starts crying (bonus points if karasu pulls up to comfort her #notthestepbrotherbutthebrotherthatsteppedup) and he immediately feels so bad that he starts apologizing but he just knows barou wouldn't have lost his temper in that situation (barou especially pursuit barou strikes me as someone who gets irritated super quickly but rarely if ever GENUINELY angry) and he already has a complex because he could never beat noel noa hence why he's an elite four candidate whereas barou was supposed to be the next champion so he's basically isagi but better (throw in some yayoi picking barou over him [not that isagi ever confessed he just assumed yayoi would want barou so he didn't say anything and surprise she ended up going for barou]) and yet isagi's the one who's left and barou's gone

PLS not the main six that's literally reader and co + manshine trio (otoya is spike the dragon) truly though barou's death/disappearance leads to so so much happening like it's insane how that one event changed the entire government...mr mikage and the government would've gotten away with their nonsense for much longer if barou literally just didn't leave for his journey or told his family he was ill and came home for his final days SLKDFJLSH ofc they still would've been exposed by the mutiny plot that the gym leaders and elite four members made but considering that plan wasn't meant to be executed for a WHILE who knows if it actually would've been effective or if they would've just murked noel noa and threatened the others into submission

KARASU BFB TAKE OVER REAL AND TRUE and okayy that's good HAHA sometimes i end up liking a character after i write for them too which is another can of worms (like kiyora i barely cared about him besides acknowledging that he was pretty pre-wicked game but now i fw him!! he's not a top top fav but he's cool)

LMAOO BRO YOU CAN'T STUDY YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHICH TYPES ARE WHICH TROPE YET HAHAHAHA and no i don't really have a preference for any character!! whatever strikes your fancy...almost hoping someone requests isagi so i can redeem myself and actually write something long for him /hj...i'm limiting the slots to twelve (two full teams) this time because i want to have time to be able to write pursuit and the oaeu and the other requests i still have to do (EEK) but i have no idea who if anyone will actually join so don't stress too much about getting in on time i'll make sure you get a spot (imagine that one drake audio that's like "don't worry...daddy's home") just make sure to send the request in a separate ask so i can respond to it w just the story hehe...anyways i fell asleep instead of posting the completed event so i will be finishing up the post and getting it out now hopefully!!

[thinkingisadangerouspastime]

hi! i really like your posts and recently i came across some anti kataang arguments and i would like to see your opinion on that (if you want to answer because you must be very tired of answering those lol)

“i remember perfectly aang forcing himself into katara. not only once, but a lot of times. in that talk they were having during the play it was one of the moments aang was intrusive”

“i saw people saying that katara was jealous of aang with that kids in kyoshi island, which she obviously was not. she was annoyed at them”

“kataang had no development. it feels like a ship made out of nowhere”

“aang is completely obsessed with the idea of katara being his. proof is that episode were the guru tells him he has to let go of her and he choses to break the connection. it’s like: look what i did for you, you should stay with me. aang learning to let go would have been a evolution for his character”

“making them stay together in the end just because aang is the protagonist and has to stay with the girl is boring and adds nothing to the plot”

“he spend years after a girl that never felt the same for him”

hi anon! im very flattered you like my posts 🥰💛 and you’re not wrong that sometimes it gets a lil tiring addressing anti kataang arguments, but that’s because 90% of them are the same foolish rhetoric dressed up in a different costume, lol. i finally have some free time, so i’ll take a stab at these for you!

“i remember perfectly aang forcing himself into katara. not only once, but a lot of times. in that talk they were having during the play it was one of the moments aang was intrusive”

not gonna lie, this particular “argument” made me crack up laughing because they “remember perfectly… lots of times” but can only name one instance 😂 like i am on the floor, because trying to get away with that in a formal essay would earn them nothing more than a goose egg. you need evidence to support a claim, which this “claim” has none of. i mean,, when does aang force himself onto katara?? when katara initiates every cheek kiss they share?? when they are mutual participants in several shared hugs?? don’t get me started on DOBS - the Now or Never Kiss that falls under literally requires reciprocation from both parties, lol. but regarding the ever-so-infamous EIP episode they bring up:

This post talks specifically about EIP and the play’s portrayal of Aang and Katara (and how it cannot be used to define their relationship). This post explains the true source of Katara’s conflict in turning down Aang (i.e. the war itself and the risks the war presents for both of them) and why the EIP kiss did not “ruin” Kataang’s relationship. This post explains how the EIP kiss was resolved through narrative parallels. This post explains how the EIP kiss is so often blown out of proportion. This post explains how Aang did not “threaten” Katara in EIP (with some excellent commentary in the notes, too).

the fact of the matter is that yes, aang overstepped a boundary with katara there. no one has ever contested that because to do so would be to disregard canon, and here’s the thing about kataang shippers: we love atla canon. it gave us everything we wanted and more. (imo, that’s what anti kataangers don’t understand.) the EIP episode can be interpreted as a “low point” for many reasons, but the primary “takeaway” is that the play performed was imperialist propaganda that preyed on the gaang’s insecurities and demeaned them (much to the pleasure of the Fire Nation audience), which had negative consequences, one of which was aang kissing katara largely out of desperation. no one has ever excused that! thus, what i think isn’t clicking with anti kataangers is that aang and katara’s miscommunication in EIP is not a representation of their relationship being doomed to fail. aang made a mistake and immediately backed off without question or hesitation. katara has time to make her own decision and chooses to forgive him. doesn’t it strip more of katara’s agency away to conclude that katara could never ever ever forgive her best friend for a single mistake that - comparatively - could have been a whole lot worse?

(im just saying.)

“i saw people saying that katara was jealous of aang with that kids in kyoshi island, which she obviously was not. she was annoyed at them”

honestly, i have a question for whoever came up with this jfksjdasks. okay, yes, she was annoyed. that’s a given based on her exasperated eye rolls and sighs. but why was katara annoyed with them, hmm?

here’s my thing about katara’s feelings in this ep: jealousy and annoyance are not inherently the same, it’s true. a person can be annoyed without being jealous (obviously). as such, there are essentially two possible interpretations that have validity, although one in my opinion has greater weight in canon:

1. yes, it is possible to interpret katara’s annoyance that episode as being solely related to their delays on kyoshi island. one can reasonably argue that katara’s romantic feelings for aang were not as strong so early in the series (it’s only episode 4, after all, although lbr - she was Looking at aang’s tattoos in episode 1 lmao), and therefore the primary reason she was annoyed at the fangirls is because they were one of the causes extending their stay on the island when katara felt they needed to leave. it’s a fair interpretation.

2. a different and stronger interpretation, in my opinion, is that katara’s irritation was a product of both annoyance at their extended stay and jealousy of the fangirls’ obsession with aang. because here’s the thing about jealousy: it doesn’t have to be some extreme, exaggerated emotion/reaction! when katara gets jealous of on ji in book 3, she makes a single comment about aang and on ji dancing together. when aang gets jealous of jet in book 2 (because of sokka’s teasing), he, too, makes a single comment (i.e. that it would be a bad idea for katara to kiss jet). i bring these two moments up because they explicitly demonstrate within atla canon that reactions of jealousy do not have to be dramatique and outrageous, à la zuko throwing ruon-jian across the room in book 3, lmao. jealousy can be simple! kept to oneself! as such, katara’s disgruntled manner in that episode - which, might i add, is largely if not only shown in reaction to aang with the fangirls - can certainly be interpreted as a quieter form of jealousy akin to several other moments within canon.

more than that, however, if the writers did not at all want jealousy to be an interpretation on the table… why on earth would they have bothered to mention jealousy as a possibility? here’s the relevant excerpt from the episode transcript:

Koko: [Stomps her foot in annoyance and puts her hands on her hips, while another girl happily waves at Aang; irritated.] What’s taking you so long, Aangy?

Cut back to Aang and Katara; the former enthusiastically waves back at his awaiting fangirls, while the latter raises an eyebrow at the scene.

Katara: [Slightly mocking.] Aangy…

Aang: [Enthusiastically.] Just a second, Koko!

Katara: [Sarcastic.] “Simple monk,” huh? [Annoyed.] I thought you promised me that this Avatar stuff wouldn’t go to your head.

Aang: It didn’t. You know what I think? You just don’t want to come because you’re jealous.

Katara: [Close-up; angrily.] Jealous? [More high pitched voice.] Of what?

Cut to a broader shot. Aang moves back slightly, when an irritated Katara resumes to ferociously stuff the basket with more fruits.

Aang: Jealous that we’re having so much fun without you.

Katara: [Irritated.] That’s ridiculous.

(sidebar, but can i just say that seeing “ferociously stuff” to describe putting fruits away is arguably the funniest thing i’ve ever read sjkdhsjalks)

to me, this excerpt alone all but proves katara’s irritation is a mixture of annoyance at the girls’ (and aang’s) behavior/their delayed departure and jealousy regarding how the fangirls’ fawn over aang. katara clearly demonstrates frustration at aang’s seeming lack of concern for their time crunch and how he’s letting his status get to his head (and remember, y’all: this is very early book 1 aang, he’s barely begun to truly reconcile what it means to be the avatar and the last airbender, which is understandable and a-okay! can’t have growth if he doesn’t start somewhere!). that checks out. but next thing you know, katara’s reaction proceeds to dramatically heighten when aang teases the idea of jealousy to her. again: why include this moment if jealousy was never on the table whatsoever as an interpretation for her feelings of irritation? why make katara’s response intensify so strongly if she’s not jealous even a little bit?

in sum, while i don’t think katara’s aggravation is solely fueled by jealousy, the episode itself points to jealousy as at least a part of it. simple!

“kataang had no development. it feels like a ship made out of nowhere”

this take screams willful ignorance, like did they even watch the whole show?? it’s not worth addressing over and over, ngl.

This post and this post explain how Katara’s feelings for Aang develop throughout the series. This post explains how Aang consistently supported Katara throughout the series. This post demonstrates how Kataang is literally ingrained in every episode.

“aang is completely obsessed with the idea of katara being his. proof is that episode were [sic] the guru tells him he has to let go of her and he choses [sic] to break the connection. it’s like: look what i did for you, you should stay with me. aang learning to let go would have been a evolution for his character”

“completely obsessed” h e l p i weep for the lack of brain cells 😭 it is so hard to just say “kataang isn’t my cup of tea” and go?? seriously?? i thought we were past making stuff up to support shipping agendas. lord help us. real quick:

This post explains how Aang never acted like he was “entitled” to Katara’s affections. This post explains how Katara and Aang do not “idolize” each other. This post and this post talk about Aang’s chakra being blocked and unblocked, and how it had to do with fear, not attachment. This post talks about Aang and the Avatar State, explicitly discussing “The Crossroads of Destiny” and the notion of attachment/letting Katara go.

okay, let’s take this claim one sentence at a time:

“the guru tells him [aang] he has to let go of her [katara] and he choses [sic] to break the connection.”

first of all. FIRST OF ALL. can you imagine the hellfire that would have rained down if aang hadn’t chosen to go rescue katara? here is a piece of the episode transcript:

… Right before he is able to completely open the final chakra and master the Avatar State, however, he hears a shriek from Katara and sees a vision of her in chains. At this, he jumps out of the energy sphere and runs away from the Avatar Spirit. The energy bridge that leads him there slowly vanishes behind him until it catches up and falls from underneath him, causing his image to plummet toward Earth. This cuts his connection to the Avatar State, which forces him back to reality.

Aang: Katara’s in danger! I have to go! [Prepares to exit.]

Pathik: No, Aang! By choosing attachment, you have locked the chakra! If you leave now, you won’t be able to go into the Avatar State at all!

Aang hesitates but leaves anyway, leaving Pathik concerned and disappointed.

aang chose to leave because katara was in danger. if he had chosen to stay,, dear god. the vitriol that would have been thrown around. “aang doesn’t really love katara! he chose not to save her!” “aang is so selfish and greedy! he chose power over love!” it’s literally a catch-22. damned if he does leave, damned if he doesn’t leave. #fandomlogic

anyways, yes, sure, aang chose to leave, which at the time broke the connection. he was indeed in avatar state limbo for a Hot Minute. whoop de do.

“it’s like: look what i did for you, you should stay with me.”

logical fallacy: ad hominem, hasty generalization, ∴ not worth our time 💛

“aang learning to let go would have been a [sic] evolution for his character”

i have amazing news for those who perpetuate this take. aang did let her go! he would not have been able to enter the avatar state in COD if he hadn’t! point blank, it is utterly untrue to pretend aang did not “let go” of his attachment to katara. now, im not going to get into the concept of “attachment” here and what it truly meant for aang to have “let katara go” in the book 2 finale (if it was good, bad, etc. etc.). there is a lot of material to work with there that would require like,, an entire post to dig into, if not more. the fact of the matter is that aang did let katara go, and the proof is that he successfully entered the avatar state before azula killed him. the above claim thus sits in complete contradiction to canon and is a moot point.

“making them stay together in the end just because aang is the protagonist and has to stay with the girl is boring and adds nothing to the plot”

“making them stay together” again, is it so hard for someone to just say “kataang isn’t my thing, im gonna stick to fanon pairings, but y’all have fun” i mean that really, really does not seem so difficult to me! also, “making” is a hilarious word to use just because,, atla is a work of fiction. in that respect, the writers “made” everything happen. you cannot escape their sphere of control.

anyways. that’s just funny to me lmao

but no, aang and katara did not get together in a romantic fashion just because aang was the lead male protagonist and katara was the lead female protagonist. i refer back to these posts from earlier:

This post and this post explain how Katara’s feelings for Aang develop throughout the series. This post explains how Aang consistently supported Katara throughout the series. This post demonstrates how Kataang is literally ingrained in every episode.

aang and katara got together because their relationship had been developed since episode 1, duh. reducing their relationship to “lead guy + lead girl” completely disregards the legwork done and the foundation laid for their romantic partnership. like, all someone has to do is rewatch the show 😂 and i hate to break it to whoever created that take, but to say kataang “adds nothing to the plot” again ignores how their relationship is one of the two most important in the show (the other being aang and zuko’s relationship as narrative foils). it is not a cheap coincidence that kataang embodies multiple complementary themes/motifs of atla: push and pull, yin and yang, air and water, oma and shu, etc. etc. their relationship adds emotional depth! how is that not relevant to the plot! atla is a show where just about every relationship is important in some regard (this post touches upon how aang alone transforms all of his friends - think of the bigger picture, then, and how every other dynamic weaves in a crucial thread to create the beautiful tapestry we call atla!).

my point is that kataang is relevant to the plot the way every relationship in atla is, whether or not someone ships/enjoys them. you cannot have a good show without having intimate relationships (emotionally, i mean). can you imagine if someone said zuko and iroh’s relationship wasn’t relevant to the plot?? there is a reason it is such a powerful moment when iroh and zuko reunite in the finale. similarly, there is a reason yue’s sacrifice and sokka’s consequential (and lasting) grief is so poignant. there is a reason it is so heartbreaking when katara and sokka have to leave behind their father at the beginning of tsr. to tie back to kataang, there is a reason it is so hard to watch katara dismiss aang in that same episode. there is a reason so many people are moved when katara pulls aang out of the avatar state when appa is stolen. there is a reason emotional reactions are incited during atla and it is because these relationships are so important!! i don’t care if someone thinks kataang is “boring” - that’s their opinion, they have a right to it. but to insist their relationship wasn’t relevant to the plot? to the story? when in fact it was a key component from episode 1?

are you kidding me?

“he spend years after a girl that never felt the same for him”

“years” lol doesn’t atla take place over the course of a year at most? pretty sure this person didn’t even watch the show 😂 for a third time, i refer to these posts:

This post and this post explain how Katara’s feelings for Aang develop throughout the series. This post explains how Aang consistently supported Katara throughout the series. This post demonstrates how Kataang is literally ingrained in every episode.

i hope i addressed these (nonsensical) arguments to your satisfaction, anon! a lot of them are the same tried-and-failed anti kataang arguments, smh. not to incite new discourse lmao, but it’d be nice if there was at least some variety 😂 thank you again for your kind words, my friend! 💛

[weirdochick56]

Mr. Evans II- Chris Evans AU Chapter Eleven

Teacher!Chris Evans x Student!Reader

Warnings: Explicit language. SMUT. DIRTY DIRTINESS.

Disclaimers: I don’t condone relationships of this kind, this is for entertainment purposes only. Please be gentle on my word-porn.

Word Count: 5, 347 words

A/N: This shit got dirty REAL quick. As I was writing it, I was so fucking confused by what my fingers were typing lmfaoooo. Also this story is nearly coming to an end and IDK what the hell im gonna do after. PLEASE stay safe and healthy y’all! 

Read Chapter Ten here!!

***

(gif isn’t mine!)

You take a long gulp of the bottle.

“It’s like I’m stuck, you know?” You say looking off into the water. “Like I don’t know how to exist or move forward or hell, even back.”

Noah, the guy you’d met at the pool, nods in understanding, taking a sip from the bottle. “Yeah. I get that, but your situation is hella complicated. I get why.”

“I guess I just have never felt one hundred percent in it, you know? Like I could never fully let myself be happy because at any moment that shit could burn down. I’ve always felt like someone was out to get us, like all the fucking odds were stacked against us,” you mumble, shivering when a breeze swishes past the dark night.

It’s been a while since you had met Noah and he was a pretty cool dude. You just clicked- it was just like that with some people you know? You just get along from the get-go. You got to talking, slowly downing the bottle in the process of course and the more time ticked by, the more your tongues loosened.

You didn’t like to play into stereotypes or anything, but you were almost entirely sure Noah wasn’t one-hundred percent straight. But maybe that was just you.

You were at a healthy buzz right now but that wasn’t gonna last long at the rate you were chugging from the bottle.

“You wanna be with him?”

You sigh, hating that there wasn’t even a little doubt in your mind or heart at the question. “I do. But I don’t know how to go about it, you know? It’s all just so jumbled for me.”

Noah releases a little sigh, laying down on the cold gravel. “I know right? It’s like you love someone so much but you also know that being with them could be dangerous, no only to you but to the life you’ve built around yourselves individually. So it’s hard between choosing everyone else or your own selfish ass.”

You glance at him, raising your brows. “From personal experience?”

He laughs but it’s a bit strained- dry. “Yeah. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m not exactly uh- straight.”

“What?! I had no idea!” You mock gasp.

“Shut up.” He laughs, slapping your arm playfully. “Yeah well, he’s actually the most beautiful human being I’ve ever met. But we’re keeping it on the dL. Neither of our parents is exactly supportive. Mine are still a bit touchy even though they’re starting to tolerate the fact that their son is gay and his- well they have no idea. If they did that situation would go awry real quick.”

You sigh, laying your head drunkenly on his shoulder. “Aw, I’m so sorry Nini.”

He laughs, casually wrapping an arm around you. “Oh? Is that my new nickname?”

You nod. “Yep.”

“You know something, Nini?” You suddenly mumble in a slur.

“What?”

“You’re not selfish for loving him- whoever he is. You’re brave.”

“Yeah? And why do you say that?” He hums.

You take the bottle from his grasp, taking a long drink. When you’re done, you sluggishly wipe your lips.

“Because I’m a fucking coward,” you mumble shakily. “I’m so fucking scared of feeling. I just shut down like a robot,” you confess, quietly chuckling. “I numb myself so that I don’t have to face the reality of it all. You face that shit head-on. You’re staying and fighting for your love. That’s super admirable.”

Noah rubs your arm comfortingly. “Thanks.”

You nod, swishing your feet in the water. “It’s true. I wish I could just be with him.”

“Then be with him,” Noah says, simply.

Just like that. As if it were that straightforward.

“It’s not that easy. There’s so many things to consider.“

“Let me ask you a question,” he quickly quips. “Do you love him? Like really truly love him?”

You swallow harshly, gripping the bottle tightly in your hands. “With every fiber in my body.”

Noah nods firmly. “Then that’s it. And listen, I’m going to be honest because it sounds like everyone in your life has been lying to you and telling you basically all you need is love to make it work. It’s not. Relationships are hard fucking work. Especially if it’s one people will have a variety of feelings on. It takes effort, time, sacrifice and you know where all that comes from?”

“Where?” You pout drunkenly.

“From you. You have to be sure you want it you have to be willing to stay and fight. But you also need love. Without love, there’s nothing. If you’re sure you want to be with him, if you think your love is worth it, then I say go for it. It doesn’t have to be this huge announcement either. It’s your relationship- it’s there for no one else but you two. If you feel comfortable later on, then do sure you can tell people.”

You ponder on his words drinking more tequila, before finally speaking in a defeated tone. “I’m scared.”

He shrugs. “Life is really just one big risk you either choose to take or not. Plus, it’s like I told you; relationships are hard work. You have to keep working at it. Even when it gets hard.” He licks his lips. “He gave an ultimatum and from what you told me, you’re not going to be here for much longer. So not to pressure you or anything, but if there was ever a time to act this feels like it’s it.”

Maybe he’s right.

*

Needless to say, by the time Noah walks you home, you’re both absolutely hammered. You make sure to call him a taxi because it was late at night and you also make him promise to text you once he got there.

After he’s gone words keep ringing around in your head over and over and over again. And so do Margo’s. In fact, you felt like you were flying on a cloud of thoughts all whirling and detaching and stringing together back again.

You start replaying everything in your head- your whole relationship. From the start to now. Like a movie.

And your heart breaks even more because you realize right there and then that at some point, the movie suddenly stops.

The movie stops.

It hits you that you’ll have no idea how it ends. What’ll happen with you two. Where you’ll end up.

For some odd fucking reason, it makes you feel sick to your stomach to think about it that way, and your skin crawls. If you let him go, you’ll never him know how the movie ends... the thought tortures you slowly to sleep as it goes round and round in your noggin, pounding you with unbearable guilt and anxious thoughts.

When you do fall asleep, though, you have a strange dream that night. Or more like you have a nightmare.

You’re standing in your room and it’s just like it was when you went to sleep that night, except that on the other side, the usual long hallway isn’t there anymore. There’s only darkness.

Your anxiety kicks up because you know what the darkness is without even touching it.

It’s the not-knowing. The pitch-black emptiness which you’re expected to walk into blind. Fucking alone.

You start hyperventilating when the pressure to walk into it becomes too much, thrashing harshly against the invisible force pushing you into it. Screaming, salty tears, kicking...

It’s all too much. Your breathing is labored and your skin burns with hot tears.

And then suddenly and like a warm blanket- two muscular arms wrap around you from behind, tugging you into a hard chest.

Chris, your mind instantly whispers.

He easily tugs you back towards the room, hugging you to his front tightly.

“I’ve got you, sweetheart. I’m here. I’ll always be here.”

And in that moment of terror, with his familiar scent and soothing voice and tight embrace, he’s safety. He’s warmth and familiarity.

...he’s home. Your home.

You just lay there with him, holding each other.

The next image flashes by instantly and suddenly the darkness is back. But this time you don’t panic...because Chris is right there with you, holding your hand. And for some reason, you know -you’re one-thousand present sure- he won’t let go.

He rubs his thumb softly over your thumb, looking at you with those alluring blue eyes of his, that soft yet capturing gaze that made you feel all fuzzy.

“It’s okay, sweetheart. I’ve got you. I’m here. I’ll always be here.” He repeats his earlier sentence.

You wipe happy tears. “I’ve got you too.”

He smiles adoringly down at you, smile lines crinkling endearingly at the corners. “I know.”

And without a second’s thought you plunge straight into the darkness.

You gasp loudly, sitting straight up in bed. Your heart races, thumping harshly against your rib cage as beads of sweat trod carefully down your temple and side of your face.

Click.

Something in you suddenly clicks and it all becomes clear. 

Was that all that was needed for realization to hit you? A single moment? A single split second in which the fog clears? A split-second where your vision suddenly elevates and the whole landscape is all there? The whole picture is laid out before you? 

It’s early in the morning and you wince when the bright light of an early day hits you in the face, flopping over in bed.

You reach for your phone on the nightstand, quickly unlocking it before checking your contacts. You have a new text message. You click on it.

Hey, Hermosa. I got home okay. Thanks for the taxi, lol.

You smile gently, typing back.

Yeah np, Nini. Thanks for the advice. Needed it.

Your phone buzzes.

Ngl, kinda shocked we still remember that. Lmfao. Ur welcome tho.

You groan softly into your pillow when your head starts aggressively throbbing.

Sobriety sucks butt.

*

“Honey, are you okay?”

Your dad and Kennedy watch you as you haphazardly stuff your face with bacon and eggs then gulf it all down like a dog- brows raised and jaws slack.

Downing your warm coffee in one go, you get up, pushing the chair back with a loud screech and almost trip running over to the sink to put your dishes inside.

“Yes. I’m good. There’s just something urgent I have to go take care of,” you rush out, leaning down over them and giving each a chaste kiss on the cheek.

“I love you guys!” You yell, already half outside and still pulling on one of your sneakers as you clumsily hopped around.

You slam the door shut, running off as soon as you finish putting on the shoe.

Your head pounds inside your skull even having downed three aspirins and having a warm shower and your breakfast swishes inside your stomach with your harsh sprinting but you don’t stop.

Not until you reach his house.

You don’t think. Just feel. Feel how right this was. You’re done being scared of loving who you love. You had what you had and it was what it was, but what you had was him.

Chris.

All this time, he said you were his light. You were his angel.

But really he was your light. He was your angel.

You needed him just as much as he needed you- if not more.

Fuck everyone else.

This was yours. He was yours and you were his and you were done fighting it. Officially.

You had the realization that before, you’d always been just the tiniest bit reluctant. You subconscious put up your own walls to protect your heart, never fully allowing yourself to work on your relationship, never fully giving your energy to it.

But not anymore. No more walls. Just you. Just you, your love and a foundation for a fresh start.

You were exhausted- not of life or him or of the curveballs it keeps throwing your way. You’re tired of fighting yourself.

That’s the real fight you’ve been having this whole time. With yourself. You’re your own damn enemy. And isn’t that fucking tiring?

But you’re done. 

Knocking loudly on the door, your chest inflated with so many emotions and with adrenaline pumping through your veins, you tug at your short shorts, hating that this was the first thing you saw and threw on.

Unfortunately, the next thing you saw was a short ass crop top so you were basically running around in your underwear.

You freeze out the nerves as soon as they start to set in when footsteps pad your way. None of that.

When Chris opens the door, you nearly fall over.

He gives you a once-over, his hair messy, and dark bags under his eyes. “Sweetheart what-“

You stare at him for a few seconds as does he, eyes wide and lips parted.

“Chris,” you breathe.

But you catch yourself and before you know it, you’re spilling all your damn beans right on his front porch.

You needed to. You had to get this off your chest or you would go absolutely insane.

“Chris before you say anything, I just want to apologize. I’ve been a huge fucking hypocrite. But I realize my mistakes and I-“ you laugh incredulously, looking at him. “I just want to be with you,” you mumble meekly, your voice low. 

Not because you didn’t mean it, but because you were terrified of his reaction. 

His eyes soften and he opens his mouth to speak, but you cut him off. 

“No, stop. I just need to finish what I have to say, okay? You were right. You scare me. What we have scares me. But I’m not willing to let you go just because I’m scared. I-” you swallow tears back down. “Being scared isn’t an excuse to let you go. God, I’ve never felt emptier in my life than these past few weeks. Not even when I was gone for two years. At least then I knew I was faraway from you. That I was somewhat safe from all these...feelings.” You gulp. “But being here-“ you shake your head. “Knowing that you’re just a few blocks away- I just want you to hold me, to make love to me, to love me in the way only you know how to.” You chuckle breathlessly. “God, I am so in love with you. Y-you complete me. You make me better- you’re the best fucking person I know. And I know I’ve been an asshole to you, or well let’s be honest we both have, but I guess mostly me- um anyway. I just- I’m here to stay.” You sigh softly, letting the words roll of your tongue like a vow. 

“I’m here to stay,” you repeat softly but firmer this time, swallowing thickly at the sweet after taste.

You’re panting by the time you’re done, both thanks to the running and the little speech you just gave, but your gaze never leaves his. Not for the whole five minutes, he just stands there, looking at you with glimmering eyes.

“Chris?” You whisper.

“Say that again,” he breathes.

“Say what?” You frown.

“Tell me you love me again,” he mumbles, a single tear sliding down his cheek.

You smile a little, looking him in the eye. “I love you. I love you. I love you,” you repeat breathlessly. “I’m here to stay- if you’ll let me that is,” you add on in a clumsy, sheepish way.

He smirks, instantly yanking you into a hug. His arm wraps around your waist and head and your arms slither their way around his broad back. You melt into him, half with delight and half with relief. 

The embrace says all the things you weren’t strong enough to say, it was passionate, warm, loving, fierce. You slid into eachother like to puzzle pieces. Like you were meant to be there- in eachother’s arms. 

Chris holds you tighter to him, using your trembling body, which you hadn’t even noticed was shaking, as an excuse you stuff his nose into your hair and press your chest to his.

“I missed you,” he breathed into you- easy as air. A breath he’d been holding for far too long and needed to release.

A breath that, once uttered, made you instantly freeze. 

You slowly parted away from him so you could properly peer into his eyes and because you have no idea how much being back with him was going to be for you emotionally. 

“I’m sorry,” you mumble, tears sprouting from your eyes. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was just scared. I’m always scared.” 

He shakes his head at you, pressing a light kiss to your forehead. “I get it, sweetheart. I was scared too. But we’re here now, that’s all that matters.”

He holds his arms out again, but catches himself before wrapping them around you and pulling you to him entirely, the question clear in his eyes; was this okay?

This embrace wasn’t like the one a few moments ago, this one was cautious because you were walking new ground. A ground that was undiscovered but all the same exciting. 

A ground that was the foundation for a new path to happiness. A new beginning. 

You simply nod in response, too tired to try to fight your need for his warmth off.

He wastes no time pulling you to his chest- nice and tight and you instantly hug him back, loving the feeling of safety and warmth you felt there.

You realize that no matter where you go or who you’re with, nothing will ever feel like being in his arms. Nothing will ever feel like home. Not like him.

His hold tightens on you- like he’s afraid of letting you go and you tighten your own hold to signify your own heightened emotions. 

The buzzing in your skin, the racing of your heart, the flush of your face, the fluttering of your tummy- all the emotions that made you feel like there was endless hope and warmth and good in the world- you missed it all. 

You listen to his slightly accelerated heartbeat and nestle your head against his chest. “So we fight?”

He heaves a heavy exhale. “We fight.”

You lick your dry lips, taking a deep breath. “Okay.”

He pushes you back slightly, brows raised. “Really?”

You can’t help but smirk a little bit. “I think I still have a little bit more fight left in me.”

*

You shift in his arms, resting your head on his chest an adjusting the leg you’d hastily thrown over his waist.

After your talk, you’d agreed that a little alone time was in order. So you threw yourselves onto his bed and did what anyone in your position -with unspent sexual frustration and endless simmering desire between your souls- would do and cuddled.

“Sweetheart,” he begins, twirling another strand of your hair in between his fingers.

“Hmm?” you mumble drowsily, drawing a new pattern on his chest with your fingertips.

“Do you love me?”

You pause, brows furrowing. Leaning up on your elbow, you peer down at him. “What?”

He smiles a little. “You heard me.”

“Why do you ask?” You blush bright red.

He chuckles, brushing a hand against your cheek. “Well, I’m not like you, angel. I actually need to hear the words. Again,” he adds cheekily.

You stare at him blankly for a few seconds, contemplating his face. He was perfect. Even the small dips or indents on his skin. Every sharp and soft line, every curve and dip and area of soft flesh.

Beneath you, his muscles strained against his soft pajamas and his warmth surpassed layers of skin and clothing in order to deep into your bones, warming you entirely.

But that wasn’t what made him beautiful. No. 

It was the fact that he was such a dork when it came to Charlotte Brontë and Bram Stroker even when he tried to hide it. It was the fact that for years he put aside his own pain to focus on the futures of his students. The pain of losing his wife.

It was that he looked at you like you were his beginning and his end and everything in between. It was the fact that he was unwilling to relent to everyone and everything telling him he couldn’t have you and that he was willing to forgive you. 

It was that he was still here. Still fighting even when everything could be lost.

He wasn’t just perfect. He was authentic. And he was beautiful just the way he was.

You finally nod, whispering lightly. “I do. I love you more than anything in the world.”

You’ve never meant anything more in your life. And it didn’t matter what would happen next because you’d be together when it happen and you’d take it on together. You’d always have eachother.

He beams adoringly, running his hands through his hair.

You instantly raise a brow. “What?”

He frowns at you. “What?”

You chuckle, a tiny smirk tugging at your lips. “Something’s wrong. What is it?”

“Wrong? Nothing is wrong. Why does something have to be wrong?”

You instantly smile, patting his cheek as you hook your leg over him tighter in order to get more comfortable. “You just ran a hand through your hair; something’s definitely wrong,” you say as if it’s obvious before softening. “C’mon talk to me.”

He looks into your questioning eyes for exactly three seconds before breaking. “Dammit, why do your eyes have to be so big and…shiny? I can never lie to them,” he mumbles under his breath.  

You laugh pressing a little kiss to his stubbled cheek. “It’s my secret superpower. Now; spill.”

He sighs, looking down at his hands. “Nothing I guess I’m kind of second-guessing now. N-not of us o-or anything!” He rushes to explain immediately after. “Just-” he sighs again, looking back down. “I dunno. I feel like I’ve been pressuring you. What if this isn’t what you really want?” He gazes into your eyes, concern swimming in his deep pools. “Is it?”

Unable to hold back a snicker you grin lightly at him. “I just gave you an entire speech about how much I want to be with you and you’re questioning it? Bit late, don’t you think?” You joke lightly.

He deadpans. “Y/n.” 

You sigh. “Yes, it is what I want. No backing out this time.” You hold out your pinky with a tiny giggle. “Pinky promise?”

He raises a brow at the small finger, scoffing at the notion. “Angel, I’m a masculine manly-man do you really think that I’m gonna pinky promise you? No.”

You wiggle your pinky with a tiny pout. “C’mon!” 

 He sternly peers down at you (again for exactly three seconds) before breaking down once more, half-heartedly linking your pinky with his and grumbling for a second time about how your eyes were “unfairly adorable”.

You laugh tightening your finger on his, as you gaze into each other’s eyes tenderly. “I pinky promise to always be with you. No matter what.”

He smiles softly, repeating your words back to you with the tenderest look in his eye. “I pinky promise to always be with you. No matter what.”

When you take your pinkie back, he rolls his eyes, chuckling. “I can’t believe you made me do that. I hate you.”

Lightly shoving his shoulder, you place a soft peck on his cheek. “You know you love me. Plus, c’mon, I came looking for you here, I can’t leave without at least a pinky promise.” 

He smirks, wiggling his brows suggestively. “You do realize this means I won, right?”

“Won?” 

He nods enthusiastically. “Yeah. This time, you came for me. So I won.”

You snort. “Asshole.”

He chuckles as you suddenly grow serious.

“You know, I hate that you know me better than I know myself. I can never hide from you,” you whisper as he grips your face with his hand.

“You don’t have to,” he says sincerely, looking directly at you. His dark gaze pierced your soul and your breath hitches, forming a huge lump on your throat. “Not from me. Not ever.”

You shiver under his touch, leaning into him. You bite your lip as you gaze at him from under your lashes. “What if what I’m trying to hide is ugly?” You husk.

He simply smiles, like what you’re saying is utterly impossible. “Then you don’t try to hide it. I want to see it all. Because you know what? In the end, I know it’s all going to be beautiful.”

You can’t keep the damn goofy smile from tugging at your lips as you softly kiss his nose. “You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” you breathe. “I love you so fucking much.”

He pecks your cheek lightly in response, resting his forehead on yours. 

“Who are we without scars, without stories to tell? Your flaws make you who you are, angel. And I’ve fallen in love with you. All of you.”

You smile softly at him, your heart thumping loudly inside your chest. “You make me all crazy, you know that?” you mumble.

He laughs, closing the distance between you two and brushing his lashes against yours. “I’m sorry.”

You giggle against his lips, softly moving yours against them as you peer into his darkened eyes and wide blown pupils. “No, you’re not.”

He rubs his thumb across your cheekbone tenderly, tracing your skin like he was afraid you’d break if he pressed too hard or rubbed too much.

“You’re right- I’m not,” he breathes hotly against your skin, playing with your lower lip.

You press your nose to his, pressure building in your chest as you slowly begin straddling him. “Do you want me?”

His other hands grips your other cheek, gaze pinning yours down with ease. “All the damn time,” he responds without hesitation, voice growing deeper and more primitive.

You smirk down at him, forgetting entirely about everything and everyone else.

“Really?”

He looks at you incredulously. “Are you serious? How do you not know what you do to me, sweetheart?”

“No, as a matter of fact, I don’t. What do I do to you, Chris?”

Your pussy begins pulsating rhythmically, panties damp at the implication.

He inhales sharply, clamping down on that plump lip. “Shit sweetheart. You want details?”

He seemed startled but turned on all the same.

You bite your lip, feeling your nipples harden under the soft fabric of the shirt and nearly let a moan slip when it rubs against the sensitive nubs as you move.

“Yes. I want you to tell me exactly how much you want me. I want you to tell me how you’ve imagined me before. What you’d do to me if you’re given the chance,” you rasp all in one breath.

As you speak, you grind your down hips on his, enjoying the much-needed friction it created in your sensitive spot.

He clenches his jaw, eyes ablaze with that fire you missed so much.

“Careful sweetheart,” he grits out through clenched teeth, hands dropping to your ass and hips. “If you get too close I might burn you.”

You look him in the eye, knowing damn well your own unquenchable fire was swaying sensually back and forth in your eyes. You wanted him—bad. In fact, you fucking needed him. You needed him like you needed air to breathe. Fuck, you ached for the feeling of his cock inside you, claiming you as his. Because damn you were his.

“Then burn me,” you say with full intent.

His eyes snap shut, fingers digging into your flesh.

“Jesus Christ, Y/n. If we don’t stop right now I can’t promise I won’t fuck you ‘til you’re screaming.”

Your pussy instantly grows wet at his words, pulsating far more aggressively than before as you move your hips faster.

“Fuck Chris. Have you dreamed about me?” You pant.

He looks up at you through heavy-lidded eyes, dick stirring in his pants. “Almost every night,” he admits without shame or hell- even embarrassment.

Than only makes you more flushed.

You lick your dry lips, his eyes following the movement. “Yeah? And what am I wearing?”

He closes his eyes, hands traveling down to your thighs before rising gradually up to your waist, pushing fabric out of the way. You tremble beneath his fingertips and he uses the chance to guide your movements against him, his long fingers setting a rhythm for you to move to.

He hisses with pleasure. “Y-you’re wearing my t-shirt. Only with panties underneath.”

You inhale deeply, chest rising but not falling just yet at the vivid image. “Mhm,” you hum softly. “And where are we?”

“My bedroom. You’re sprawled out on my bed, sleeping.”

You bite your lip. “Are you hard yet?”

“Hell yes,” he breathes, digging his nails into your ass. “I can see your ass from here. All of that for me,” he moans softly against your chest as he adjusts you and his grip on you so your tits are closer to his face.

You arch back at the sensation of having his hard cock rubbing against you from beneath his pants.

“You’re moving around in your sleep and I’m getting harder because you look so damn innocent but sexy all at once. Like you’re just asking me to ruin you.”

You moan against him, accidentally brushing your nipple against his lips in the frenzy of your dry humping.

You freeze for a second, letting the sensation sink into your cells, warming them with electrifying bliss before moaning louder when Chris lightly opens his mouth to take one of them in over the thin material of the shirt.

Your mouth falls open at the sensation and your finger rake through his hair, tugging on the strands harshly as he gently suckles on the sensitive bud, rolling his tongue around it with expert sensuality.

His eyes meet yours as he does this and neither of your looks away as he flicks his tongue back and forth, causing your whole body to nearly overload with bliss.

“Fuck Chris,” you mewl, digging out nails into his scalp.

He stops sucking, using his finger to play with them instead. Your mouth falls open in a choked-up scream as he continues narrating his dirty dream for you.

“Even from there I can see how soft your skin is. How perfect your tits are and how good they’d fit in my hands. It’s torture until I walk over to you and grab one of your ankles gently in my hands…”

“Yes?” Your breath hitches as he hits a sensitive spot.

“And the other one too. Then I slowly part them. I don’t want to wake you yet. Not like that.”

You bite your lip, holding back a moan.

“When I’ve completely opened your legs, I slowly crawl up your body, kissing your legs as I go. When I reach your inner thighs, I slowly lift my shirt up….” he trails off, his thumb softly grazing your sensitive nub.

Your head flies back at the sudden jolt of pleasure it sends up your spine. “Shit Chris,” you groan.

“I start leaving open-mouthed kisses all over your soft skin. You’re shifting in your sleep, growing wetter, but you still haven’t woken up. Finally, I kiss your pussy.”

At the words coming out of his sinfully soft mouth, you feel your stomach clench, mouth capturing a silent scream and swallowing it back down.

He keeps you moving against him, his fingers gripping your thigh and his thumb working soft circles into your now soaked panties.

You gyrate into his hand rhythmically, fully concentrated in how good he felt.

“Uh-huh,” you finally grit out.

He continues speaking, voice strained and tone nearly drowned out entirely by animalistic frenzy. “You slowly peel your eyes open as I’ve begun flicking my tongue over your clit back and forth.” He copies the motion he describes with his thumb, smirking viciously when you nearly fall over him.

“I’ve been doing it over your sheer lace underwear this whole time, but when you are finally awake, your smell and your taste become too much for me to handle. You intoxicate all my senses sweetheart. I just want you on my tongue. I want you to ride my face until you cum in my mouth.”

And that’s all he needs to add to his jerky thumb movements for you to cum. Hard.

As if he can sense that you’ve reached a climax, he watches you with hunger, drinking in the sight of you coming all for him. “That’s right, sweetheart. Cum for me. All for me. Fuck, Y/n.”

You convulse, cursing like a damn sailor into his mouth. “Fuuuuck Chris!”

When you’re done, you slouch against him.

He hugs you to him and the rumble of his laughter travels through you, causing your sensitive insides to tremble. “You okay, sweetheart?”

You lift your head carefully. “Yes.”

He smiles. “Good. Y/n?”

“Yeah?”

“I want to make love to you.”

“Oh.”

Read Chapter Twelve here!!

***

The flashbacks to Mr. Evans I are real. Omfg. 

I’m literally in love with him.

A special thanks to:

@star-spangled-steve

@tomoyaevaans

@pepsicola-is-my-brand-man​

@whereeverythingisbetter​

@fallenoutofrose

@plutonium-m

@beepbeepromanoff

@faithmichaluk

@sincerelytlh

@tomshelbystits

@kind-sober-fullydressed

@emmarogers222

@sashimi-cat

@zofty15

@gemgemswift

@fafulous

@chljmntgy

@thatssograce

@leclerc-stan

@colddsalsa

@evansislife

@chris-butt

@captainchrisstan

@marvels-gurl

@davestridersrightnipple

@agirlcanstilldream

@notbexmader

@ib-ebe

@byrogers

@theangrylizard

@oh-hey-janina

@mannatgalhotra​

And My forevers!

@jessikared97​

@ladyofletters67​

@lilypalmer1987​

@sammykb1994​

@tomshelbystits​

[vynnyal]

Throwing random thoughts, headcanons, and a variety of pasta at the wall (but only those having to do with vessels and/or their biology this time): The Thrilling Third Installment™

...aka pretending i can be dark and dramatic jskhdfd

Thk's larger form is not the standard, but the exception. Thk was cited as being "raised and trained to prime form", which people take to mean pk assisted in the vessel's natural growth. However, that conclusion leaves a lot of unanswered questions, most important of which being “then what about Ghost?” In short, I think that train of thought is backwards. Vessels can't grow- they are ageless, and immortal. We know this due to Ghost, despite living as long if not longer than thk, being completely unchanged over the years. The only thing pk trained into "prime form" was thk’s mind and fighting prowess. Their body... well, I think it was mutated. Most likely either directly by pk, or ordered by him- and with the shenanigans happening over in the sanctum, I wouldn't be surprised if Soul was involved, too. In any case, it was in no means natural. Vessels are corpses reanimated by void; neither corpses nor void tend to make drastic changes on their own all that often. Whether pk predicted the vessel’s “issues” and intended to manually “upgrade” them from the beginning, it's hard to say. But... yeah. Unless Ghost goes out of their way to make themselves grow- if its even possible, now that pk is gone- its fairly safe to say, they never will.

...with that in mind, we are promptly gonna ignore that for the rest of this post lmaooo

Grown-up vessels wouldn't look like thk; while they are described as being raised into "prime form"... prime form, to whom? Rather than looking like an idealized pk soldier, it sounds much more fitting that they’d have an entirely different, natural adult form. Consider: their cloaks being longer and fuller, perhaps filling out into something with a more practical use to their “species”. Better yet, they could even grow up to be more beast-like. Feral vessels, YEhaW

The black egg temple is cited as being "built to sustain [vessels]", yet it can't be their lifespan that is sustained. Rather, it seems the egg is specifically designed to keep the radiance from tearing thk apart, physically and/or mentally. Ngl its p obvious, but worth noting.

Sorta-au where Ghost’s shade has 8 eyes, and/or is generally all-around more cryptid-looking.

@ the sharpshadow charm and the strange, 6-eyed creature their shade turns into: kudos to this post, they bring up something super interesting- the creature not only resembles the Shade Lord, but the lord outright becomes it during the Embrace the Void cutscene.

makes me respect the ol’ civilization a whole lot more if a single charm can turn a baby shade into a baby lord.

The concept of finding ghosts unconscious body, laying next to a corpse, while they battle in their dreams. Alt: when ghost enters the dream realm, their shade leaves their shell... And protects their body from harm.

If steel soul mode is taken as canon, just how did ghost and the shade meet? Alt: Ghost may never have “met” it at all, as it technically doesn’t exist in that mode- instead, its more of a metaphor than an actual entity.

What the vessels looked like- or were supposed to look like- before the void. Alt: a story following a child, alive and untouched, that somehow managed to be spared. They could even have a gender. Alt alt: the void intentionally spared them for some purpose, or even out of simple kindness- or at least, something that resembles kindness.

Re: the shade inexplicably having a nail: all the vessel's swords are crafted from “will-bearing rock”- of which i’ve come to lovingly call living stone- and as such, are of void themselves. That's how the shade seems to conjure up its own copy; it merely shapes it, from the ground, using void. And, while more of a stretch, Ghost’s nail being some sort of living stone/pale ore alloy could explain just how Ghost can do seemingly pretty crazy things with an otherwise ordinary nail. Better, while 100% a baseless hc, its material might actually enable Ghost to build it up and modify it to suite their size as they grow older. finally, a logical reason adult Ghost has an adult-sized nail-claymore. hdsfghjfghdsjf

On that same thought: Ghost outright invented the "art" of manipulating- or creating- living stone to make their nail. ...gimme a sec. The other escaped vessels have nails, too, right? Either meaning they also discovered this ability... or that theres some legitimate ground for the “vessel gang” hc. Or, yanno, i’m reading too much into Ari’s sprites but sHHhh

How did all the vessels know to race to the top? They seemed to be falling merely because they had just been born and had literal, actual baby strength; yet not only did they inexplicably risk everything competing to the top, they somehow knew death was waiting if they lost. Alt: pk just, bringing a fucking megaphone and telling them like a sports announcer.

What if Ghost made it, and instead of falling, they managed to joined thk at the lip? What would pk do? Push them off the edge??? Or just adopt them both?? Oh fuck au where they're raised as twin sacrifices. Or worse yet, they’re raised unequally, and one is trained only as an afterthought. As a backup.

Alternatively, pk keeps all the vessels au, only a few years later when they're grown. Pk now has a literal army of pure knights. Radiance is fucked.

Hm. If vessels were fully coherent entities from the moment of birth, why was there a crib in the white palace? Did... did they use it? I have a feeling team cherry made that asset before the abyss scene lmaooo alt: they did, uh, use the crib. Cue a very awkward scene of thk, clearly not a normal baby, staring at wl with like... idk, the poofy baby hat and pacifier. I can’t tell if the image is more funny or more sad rn shdfgfjsdgg

The og notes that inspired this post, in case my rambling makes more sense (and w/o the awful comic hjsfgjsdfhj): Oh oh OH i GET it now. The void is all about "will" and whatnot, right? And shades are "fragments of a lingering will"- will, like the one you leave after your death, but instead of inheritance its the vessels' desires...last regrets.... DAMN team cherry, that symbolism is clever as heck. That took me a while. Kinda funny how a will is, technically, a person's last regrets Like I knew they were last regrets but I didn't understand WHY. Duh, it's because they're literally Made Of Will. They are the vessel's "wills". I'm so stupid.

Ghost, walking thru the abyss, getting increasingly fed up / freaked out, ducking into a crack in the wall. They follow the crack into the Scream Chamber, pause, then exhale in relief that this was EXACTLY what they needed.

Ghost's shade rolling up its void-sleeves like “fuck it, ima defeat thk myself”

Why was thk's sword there? Was its pedestal decayed? Did it fall from their body? Was it place there as an afterthought, or hurriedly? alt: taking thk's sword before freeing them, but doing the mom thing like you're grounding them hdhfjchjch

I can’t believe it just occured to me now, but... as objectivley stupid as the vessel’s test was, Ghost... technically came in second place. What if that whole scene was a metaphor? Because really, it’s just too silly to take seriously. To do so isn’t too far fetched, either; many other elements in the game’s story are better taken as symbolic or metaphorical, anyways. Take the PoP cutscene- while it could’ve been a literal moment, where they just happened to find themselves standing around and took the moment to appreciate each other... imo it makes much more sense to read it as the concept of their faint ~forbidden love~ and parental pride itself. Or, better yet, the scene at the end of the 4th pantheon. Sorry, but I severely doubt that was an actual event. What I’m trying to get at is the significance of “second place” in the cutscene. My brain is too fried to chase down any other possible connections to this theme rn (if thats even what the theme is), but even without proof, the theory smooths out a few interesting tidbits related to just how Ghost could tough it out when all others failed. All except for #1, anyway. Either way I’m just happy to take this as an excuse to pretend that cutscene didn’t literally happen because like, l m a o

The story of a small group of vessels as they work together to escape hallownest. (aka the aforementioned vessel gang hc... im sure theres a more formal name but you get the idea). Its impossible to tell how long it took them to discover that near-invisible hole, the last exit remaining after the king ordered the abyss to be sealed up. Once they did, however, the remaining vessels were quick to make a desperate scramble to escape- only for the entrance to suddenly crumble shut, far, far too soon. The remaining 8 slowly made their way through deepnest, their numbers quickly dwindling as the jouney started to take its toll. The group was nearly wiped out by those terrible, spiney-legged creatures that used their own kinship against them. Only three finally escaped the deep, yet only two made it through the basin- the third, largest sibling, left to fight alone againt a hopeless battle, just to buy the others time. It was in greenpath, so close yet so far to their goal, that the second succumbed to the infection. It was a mercy killing, that nail through the heart. The last, after all of that, finally made their way to the very precipice of howling cliffs, hesitating for just a moment to gaze out upon the still-fresh ruins of hallownest. But only for a moment, before Ghost jumps down to begin their journey beyond this wretched place.

A vessel running from its shade as it tirelessly pursues them, the vessel refusing to put it to rest.

tw: suicide, + personal on main

Ugh ugh ugh ugh Either thk was fully conscious and in terrible pain for all those years... or they couldn’t feel anything at all. The former is horrible, but imagining thk waking up, chained, unable to do anything but wait for Ghost to heed their call? Did they turn their nail on themselves to help Ghost, end the pain, or some awful mix of both? For someone who has personally dealt with close friends and family that struggled with suicide themselves, hollowknight is one of the worst horror stories I've ever seen. And the fact that the story is so personal, so open to interpretation? The fact that each character is so genuine yet vague enough to be read completely differently to someone else’s biases? Its why hollow knight- the game, and the character- will forever be one of the most powerful stories to me.

in short, good LORD THIS GAME IS SO FUCKING SAD

[museofzero]

Ngl I can honestly see my fallout 4 character (Lavender, lav for short) just like, raising a baby deathclaw from an egg. Like she finds a deathclaw egg next to a dead deathclaw and deciding on her own to take it in and then loudly announcing to her settlement. That she will be raising this Deathclaw egg while Nick and Preston are trying to convince her not to like “holy shit Lav, please,,, for the love of the atom bomb don’t do this,, oh my lord you’re so stupid”

all while Hancock and Deacon are just like, “FUCK YEAH LETS RAISE A DEATHCLAW” and “IM GOING TO NAME IS FLUFFY” while the others are yelling at them, “DON’T ENCOURAGE THEM” and Dogmeat’s just highly confused by everything but rolling with it. and then like, she ends up actually raising it and you just see this women, with a sniper rifle, and leader of the Minutemen, just chilling and some raider goes to fuck with her settlement and like all they see is this big ass hulking Deathclaw charging at them and yeeting them into the atmosphere.

But like the Deathclaw is totally a mamma’s boy and is just like

“Are you proud mom?? I protected the settlement mom!! Are you proud??”

And Lav’s just like “yes I am very proud.” Like she loves everyone equally but it’s very obvious that she picks favorites (cough cough Dogmeat and her deathclaw). Like this women takes everything in, no matter what. Like by now, everyone just a knows Lav as not the General of the Minutemen, no no no, But as “I tame every creature don’t fuck with me” women.

[blxckdamask]

Trashcan’s Fic Rec: July ‘19

i know this is really late but i was busy so i couldnt really get this done. an yway,,, yall know the drill by now,, this has a bunch of bnha (mostly bkdk) and some rairpairs aswell as some drarry, odaat and b99.

BNHA Fics:

{bakudeku}

Roadmap of Our Lives by erza_mikazuki | 4k | 1/1| nsfw | emotional sex | body worship | scars | fluffy smut is my shit ngl

When Izuku's insecurities about his scarred body hit him full throttle, Katsuki is there to show Izuku just how beautiful scars can be.

4 AM Inquiry by SecretKiwi | 3k | 1/1 | established relationship | marriage proposal | fluff | this fic is how im tryna be 

Katsuki's reflection above the sink stared back. Eyes still drowsy with a hint of a shadow beneath them. Hair more of a mess than he would prefer, but he was plenty awake now.

All because of Deku.

~

Katsuki reflects at 4 am.

Happy Pride by PrinceTriscuit | 2k | 1/1 | getting together | gay fluff | coming out | wholesome 

Pride has always had a special place in Midoriya Izuku's heart.

Love For a Friend by Jessica14 | 2k | 1/1 | magic au | ghost izuku | protective bakugou | angst with a happy ending | idk how to summarize the tags just read it its so fucking good

"I trusted you and you had me murdered!” Midoriya wailed, anguished. Bakugou twitched focusing on the spell that made him capture Midoriya's soul.

“Shut up! You got yourself killed!”

“I didn't! You said you had my back and I thought you had it! But you didn't! Kacchan! My body!” Midoriya cried as he watched Bakugou lug his limp body through the forest.

This is what happens when Bakugou tries to become best friends with Midoriya again.

Say It Again by bkdkwritingsdump | 2k | 1/1 | angst | quirk mishap | angry izuku | established relationship | guilty bakugou 

Katsuki doesn't know what's wrong with Izuku. Is he mad? What is he mad about? What did Katsuki do!? All he knows is that he can't let Izuku break up with him. Not while they're still keeping their relationship a secret.

Or

Izuku forces Katsuki to apologize for everything he's ever done to hurt him.

Best Friends by artindistress | 13k | 2/2 | fem!deku | best friends au | getting together | minor izuchako | fluff | friends to lovers | this shit is so fluffy im in love

Bakugou and Midoriya have been best friends since... well, since either of them could remember. But both harbor unspoken feelings for the other, will this be an end to their friendship?

Foster-Mates by bkdkwritingsdump | 32k | 15/15 | hybrids au | cat!katsuki & dog!izuku | getting together | tw past abuse | tw self harm | angst | angst with a happy ending | eventual nsfw 

Izuku, a dog hybrid, has lived with his owner Toshinori, a retired hybrid psychologist, his whole life. He takes on some of the shelter’s most difficult cases as fosters, and so Izuku has learned to be the best foster-mate possible for scared and abused hybrids. At first, Katsuki, a cat hybrid who’s been kept in a tiny apartment nearly his whole life, seems just like any of the other awful cases they’ve seen, but somehow, Izuku and him grow a lot closer than usual over the course of his stay. Eventually, the question becomes: could he stay forever?

bellflowers by vannral | 15k | 4/4 | hanahaki disease au | getting together angst | angst with a happy ending | unrequited love (kinda) | eventual fluff

“Izuku knows what the Hanahaki does. He knows what his options are, and sure, they aren’t great. In fact, they’re pretty horrible. The list is short and daunting. There are still flower petals on his pillow."

In which Izuku has Hanahaki Disease, and Katsuki's furious.

TFW Your Roommate Brings a Baby Home by Hotshott (Artemystic) | 5k | 1/1 | friends to lovers | fluffy fluff | baby used as a plot device | this is just pure fluff guys its great 

And you're crushing on him, and he's just so cute, and the baby's cute, and what's a guy to do, anyway?

family dinners by luciimariiellii | 1k | 1/1 | family fluff | friends to lovers | pining for days | this is so cute i love 

Ever since they were little, Izuku and Katsuki’s families have had family dinners. It’s just them and their parents, and that’s fine. Until more people get dragged in. (And try to set Izuku and Katsuki up.)

for twinstars week day four - family

{todobaku}

cold, hot and so damn soft by orphan_account | 7k | 1/1 | established relationship | light angst | fluff | romance 

It started from a normal evening to a small argument that made them go on vacation that made Katsuki realize that he wanted something more from Shouto.

The Shitty Parents Squad (series) by YinYangZodiac | 8 works | 15k | tw child abuse | tw domestic abuse | caring characters | ooc kinda | this is very soft but very sad and im so in love with this series 

Bakugou, Denki, Midoriya, Momo and Todoroki all end up in a McDonald's one early morning. A suggestion of a movie and a credit card reveal later and the teens are off to spend the day together.

They all know that it's Todoroki's father's credit card, but none of them care.

Eyes Aren't Always Windows To The Soul by Alienqueen42, TheLibrarian9 | 1k | 1/1 | deaf!bakugou & blind!todoroki | emotional hurt/comfort | heavy angst | light fluff | getting together 

Bakugo and Todoroki both find themselves living together with disabilities, helping each other get by. In doing so, they fall in love.

{rairpairs & other ships} 

staring into our bright future by wonduhhwoman | kacchako | 9k | 1/1 | quirk mishap | future and present uraraka swap bodies | established relationship | developing relationship | fluff 

“You haven’t changed at all, have ya?” he observed, pinching her cheek affectionately.

Ochako batted his hand away from her cheeks for the second time that morning, wondering if he had a thing for them. “That doesn’t even make any sense, Bakugou. I’m from the past. Of course I haven’t changed.”

“Makes perfect sense,” Bakugou countered, closing his teeth around a bite of eggs. “You were doing this same shit yesterday morning.”

-

My entry for the day 2 prompt of Kacchako week: otherworldly.

Five Times his Service Dog helps Shinsou and One Time Bakugou does by SupaKawaiiDesu | bakushin | 7k |1/1 | tw panic attacks and disorders | hoh!bakugou | fluff | college au | strangers to friends to lovers | fluff | light angst | fluffy shit we fuckin stan this rairpair

Bakugou watches with something akin to affection when Shinsou starts playing with his dog until she jumps all around him and is barking excitedly. He has never seen the both of them so content before. The Sergeant is always so concentrated at College grounds, either that or she’s calm but still looking out for him. Bakugou has seen them during lectures, at lunch at their usual table, during their ways to Bakugou’s dorm and to Shinsou’s apartment off campus, he has seen them through their late-night-skyping sessions and in countless pictures on Sergeant Barkowitz’ Instagram. He has seen their best but not their worst, and that makes Bakugou wonder if he’ll ever be such a great companion to Shinsou like the Sergeant is.

A Hero's Goodbye by Gentle_Love_9 | erasermic | 1k | 1/1 | death fic | major angst | somehow fluffy as well?? | bitches i cried so fuckin hard when i read this omf

"Shouta could have never imagined reaching this point in his life. He honestly expected to die at some point when he was younger, alone somewhere in an alleyway, killed in action during his hero work maybe."

Instead he's in a warm hospital bed and surrounded by some of the people he cares most about.

On These Unsteady Legs by Spider_Lilly | erasermic | 4k | 1/1 | shinsou and eri centric | hurt/comfort | angst with a happy ending

Shinsou Hitoshi had never had a family before, and he refuses to screw it up. But when a villain attacks him and his new little sister, he may have lost the only family he's ever had.

We love and respect Bakugou in this house (series)  by Bakudont_be_weird | bakudabi | 5 works | 54k | tw rape/non-con | abo | alpha!dabi & omega!bakugou | very nsfw | stockholm syndrome | mpreg | fucked up fluff | angst with somewhat of a happy ending ig | ngl this ship is suppose to be fucked up and problematic but this series is really fucking good if you're into fucked up fics

Bakugou never wanted to be mated. Especially not to a villain but it didn't look like he had any choice in the matter. The only question now was: will he ever escape?

OR,

The author loves Bakugou and loves to make him suffer so Dabi kidnaps him and forces our favourite blasty boy to become his mate. It goes from bad to good to bad and back to good.

Days in a Crucible by doop_doop | bakuiida | 40k | 9/9 | kidnapping | emotional hurt/comfort | getting together | developing relationship | acquaintances to lovers | mentions of past todobaku | ptsd

While working together as pro heroes, Iida, Bakugou and Todoroki are taken captive. The situation is strange: none of their Quirks work, and they aren’t tortured or killed – in fact, they never see their captors. There is nothing to do but wait.

Things are tense between the three of them, but Iida finds the situation bringing him closer to Bakugou than he thought possible. But who knows how this will change things between when they get out…

Pet Names by BluePlanetTrash | bakuiida | 4k | 2/? | quirk mishap | ooc | flufffffffff | overuse of petnames | #LetBakugouBeSweet2k19 | iida calls bakugou sugar and thats all that matters

Quirk: Infatuation - The user of this quirk affects two people by touching them at the same time, they then fall into a state of infatuation with each other; they could be affected by this for up to a week.

Iida and Bakugou get affected by an infatuation quirk that makes them be sweet to each other. So sweet, that it could give you cavities. Warning: This story will contain an excessive amount of pet names, hence the title.

Other Fandoms Fics: 

Portrait of a Young Girl by trishjames | drarry | 8k | 1/1 | established relationship | trans!teddy | internalised homophobia | family feels | light angst with a happy ending

Recently married, Harry and Draco are tasked with raising a four-year old Teddy, whose emerging gender identity brings up an array of questions, fears, and revelations for them when they realise that Teddy might be transgender.

Over the Moon and Up the Duff by hdmpregmod | drarry | 4k | 1/1 | established relationship | mpreg | fluff | harry is a little shit

When Draco learns he's pregnant again, he blames his husband. Harry, however, couldn't be happier.

Boyfriends From College by Impossibly_Izzy | peraltiago | 1k | 1/1 | bi!jake | established peraltiago | jake dated schneider and john mulaney | self discovery 

Jake dated two guys in college, but doesn't realise until he introduces one of them to Amy.

broken compass, still moving forward by confessionofaking | odaat (no pairing) | 1k | 1/1 | trans!schneider | coming out | misunderstandings | trans schneider stans come get yalls juice

The family learns a secret about Schneider

lemongrass and sleep, apple juice and peach by riverblujay | odaat (no pairings) | transgirl!alex | self discovery | coming out | syd is a great friend 

alex said the far scarier sentence that at the same time was more comforting than anything the teenager had ever heard before. “she,” alex mumbled under his- no, her- breath, voice beginning to choke up, “was sitting on her bed, in her room. her,” he- she, she- sighed and spoke just a little louder, just a little surer. “her name is alex, and she’s a girl.” alex smiled to herself, so small it was probably barely considered one. she didn’t care; she finally felt whole.

or: in another world, elena isn't the only alvarez daughter (but it takes alex some time to figure that out)

[zanguntsu]

Do you have any ideas for pokemon teams for orihime or tatsuki? I'm thinking Orihime would at least have an Audino

anon? anon i love you and now i can never shut up about pokemon. thank you for this

orihime team! i Have considered it and i associate her with fairy and normal types most of all! she tends to be more of a support character so her team seems like it would have A Lot of buffs and can heal themselves!

audino- I really like audino for her because audino is such a nurturing pokemon and it’s the chansey/blissey of the unova region! plus it mega evolves so she can have that for More power. it’s also a very empathetic pokemon i feel, since it can read heartbeats so having that kind of pokemon seems nice!

Blissey- blissey is in the same vein as audino but blissey is a giant tank! like i’m pretty sure it has one of the highest hp stat in the game and it works with her defense side! i almost considered chansey because i have fond memories of pissing people off with my toxic stall chansey sjskdj but i feel like she would have a tank that can constantly heal is good! it’s eggs are pure happiness!

Mimikyuu- i love mimikyu because spooky babey and the whole premise behind it is that it envies the popularity of pikachu and i feel like orihime would really sympathize with it because she knows what its like to compare yourself to another person.

togekiss- it’s because im really fond of the togepi line and it’s just a babey. it is babey and i love it. plus she’s such a big caring type that i feel like she would raise it from the egg like uhh misty. it brings blessings and kindess which i thing is something orihime would like in a pokemon

ribombee- ribombee looks so nice and it’s an excellent support pokemon that has a move that damages and heals depending who you use it on! it reminds me of the shun shun rikka fairies in appearance tbh and it looks like a cute fairy! i was split between ribombee and comfey but i ribombee has more damage output than comfey.

alolan raichu- alolan raichu is such a fun pokemon, like it’s just raichu but with more fluff and surfboard and i feel like she would really enjoy an alolan raichu because it just activates serotonin and because she’s a fun person who probably really likes that aspect of raichu!

tatsuki is a more headstrong battle-oriented person, so i feel like she gravitates to pure power types so i associate her with fighting and dragon types! she seems to be the competitive type and is just a powerhouse trainer!

Kommo-o- its a dragon fighting type, how could i not add it! kommo-o is fierce and it’s the psuedo-legendary of alola region and im really fond of this pokemon because it’s built to be a bit like a sweeper (although every psudeolegendary is tbh) and it’s just a nice pokemon that can counter its main weakness, ice and dragon, and i just associate her with kommo-o in general sjwjjd

Gallade- im love gallade because i just love the aesthetics, especially of it’s mega evolution aesthetics so this is the pokemon that she can mega evolve because it’s just a gallant pokemon who fights savagely to protect, which makes me think about the one time tatsuki punched ichigo because he wouldn’t tell her about orihime. it’s a Knight and it fits tatsuki.

Charizard- charizard because flying and fire which reminds me of the lost potential of dragon type (w/o mega evolution), just like tatsuki and that kubo is a coward. it likes strong opponents and is just Big Powerhouse and i feel like those type of pokemon suit tatsuki. plus fire type is just a tatsuki type ngl and it’s overall aesthetic fits her because it’s more of the traditional dragon sjwjdjkd

Sawk- *starts sweating* okay it’s partly because they both do karate but sawk is is a very focused and disciplined pokemon who practices a lot, which i feel like would go well for someone like tatsuki who takes pride in her status as the 2nd strongest girl in japan so she would want a pokemon that can go work with her

talonflame- talonflame is a very speedy pokemon and attack heavy pokemon! i used talonflame before and its really good because it has some nice moves (and gale wings, one of my favorite abilities!). Like it’s a very good competitive pokemon and i believe its uber tier unless im wrong and i feel like she would want to maximize its potential from a normal flying to a fire flying.

jolteon-since her team is mainly fighting i feel like an electric type would be extremely useful to her since that gets rid of those pesky flying types ™ and it’s just overall a good pokemon, like it isn’t slow and it has some good attacks! like since she’s competitive, it’s just not a good idea to leave three team members with one huge weakness against a type and the other two pokemon being able to resist but not deal with it as effectively as say an electric type against flying.

[punksqueer]

answer ALL of the crayola questions bitch I dare u 👀

CHALLENGE ACCEPTED, SON

Macaroni and Cheese: What makes you think of your childhood?honestly?? the smell of old spice products, dark cloud 2 (game), red hot chili peppers and sublime music

Spring Green: How do you relax when you’re stressed?I mean idk if I’d call this relaxing, but: chain smoke, destroy my fingers (oops), listen to music, use fidget toys, and go for a long-ass powerwalk

Asparagus: What’s an unpopular opinion you have?hamburger helper is absolutely disgusting.

Bittersweet: Has someone you loved ever hurt you?YEP

Eggplant: Explain your url and avatar.url: inspired by punks not dead and being dead insideavatar: me edgily using a cool snapchat filter when i was working at a motorbike shop

Outer Space: Do you ever feel like you’re an outcast from others?aha yes

Cotton Candy: What is your favorite dessert?b r o w n i e s

Freckle: Do you have any marks on your skin? How do you feel about them?many!! i have a stitch scar on my right hand middle finger from a garden shear accident, stretch marks, self harm scars, random scars from being a kid who wasn’t afraid to climb and occasionally fall out of trees n such, roughing around, uhhh, cat scratch scars from trying to bathe a cat who really didnt want to be bathed. also, acne scars. and once, i was 9 and dropped a large, heavy glass bowl on my foot. it permanently split the nail down one of my big toes down the middle. I like them all, really

Shocking Pink: Is there a trait that you have that others don’t expect from you?probably hyperempathy and kindness because of how I look

Robin’s Egg Blue: If you were an animal, which one do you think would you be?100% a possum

Granny Smith Apple: What’s something everyone else likes that you don’t?hamburger helper, apparently.

Dandelion: What’s a pet peeve of yours?when people are rudely dismissive of others’ feelings

Atomic Tangerine: What gets you motivated to do a difficult task? 3 cups of coffee and smokeWisteria: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?body hair, scars, piercings, and tattoos

Candy Apple: How do you think others view you?weird, awkward, or intimidating probably

Plum: Are you insecure about anything?me teeth, me lisp, and me awkward stance when around others

Sky Blue: Where do you feel the most at home?my college, my grandma’s, n my hometown (also, the forest ngl)

Tickle Me Pink: How do you try to cheer others up when they’re sad?memes, talkin’ it out, lettin them rant

Wild Strawberry: Do you care what others think about you?no often, but yes, sometimes

Glossy Grape: Recommend something to your followers.honestly, check out gravity falls if you’ve never watched it before

World Wide Web Yellow: What was the last thing you looked up?how to renew a passport

Shadow Blue: Do you have a darker side to you that most people are unaware of?i mean, idk what classifies as a darker side?? like does that mean kinky or something?? other than that, the only thing I got is that while majority of the time I’m outwardly chill and often un-bothered, there are few times in which (IRL) I completely lose my shit after being pushed too far and will be completely consumed by rage that has been built up for too long. verbal arguments, yelling, slamming things. I have a lot of repressed anger

Electric Lime: What genre of music do you listen to?punk, rock, grunge, that kind of stuff. though I listen to a lot of different things, I don’t feel like listing them all. really, im fine with anything except country

Night Owl: Describe a very interesting dream that you had.I recently dreamt that I broke my fucking phone and i was so upsetti

Cornflower: What do you think about the most?crippling anxiety, depression, what to do with and about my life, worries about politics, mental health, and financial struggles ¯\_(ツ)_/ ¯

Grasshopper Green: Describe the area where you live.quiet, family neighbourhood, close to a park and a soccer field, farmland in behind the housing

Misty Moss: Is there anything you regret?(in high school) staying at home and refusing to go out with friends, on dates, or on class trips (and other trips) that would have been fun (and paid for/taken care of) because I felt that I did not deserve them.

Tiny Toad Brown: Do you find beauty in something that people consider to be ugly or undesirable?that’s a hard yes. I frequently point out the beauty I see in people and things alike that other people dont

Sunny Side Up: Do you like waking up in the mornings, or would you rather sleep in?when Depression ™: sleepwhen not depression: E A R L Y

Kitten Gray: Do you have any pets? If so, describe them. 2 whole hairy bois raised from feral kittens I found outside, and a ball python

Rose Dust: Describe your aesthetic in five words or less.queer punk

Timberwolf: Do you give second chances when somebody has wronged you?oh fuck, I give people far too many chances

Freshly Squeezed: What excites you?FOOD, ANIMALS, THE FAIR

Firefly Red: What gives you purpose?ny existence is a “fuck you” to everyone who ever said I couldn’t.

Tiny Teapot Tan: Do you consider yourself to be attractive/cute?fuck yeah m8 im hot as fuck

Rain Drop Blue: Describe the weather outside.THERE BE A STORM BREWIN’

Sweet Pea Green: Do you have/want children?want.

Pussywillow: Do you like being around others, or do you like being alone?both??

Jack ‘O’ Lantern Orange: What’s your biggest fear and why? abandonment, dying alone

Baby Bunny Pink: Do you look young for your age, or do you look older than you are?I dunno really

Mystic Maroon: What confuses you, and why?people just, getting jobs and being able to work with like, no problem doing it?? like, ??? my anxiety, my crippling fear that I will inevitably fuck something up, my inability to take verbal criticism in social situations by people I dont know

Cosmic Cobalt: What’s your zodiac sign, and do you think it’s accurate?Aquarius, and yes.

Petal Pink: Describe your fashion sense as well as what you’re wearing right now.honestly my fashion sense is wild, and blue cargo shorts that came from mum’s work (she works at a provincial park) and ripped, grey tank top

Mountain Meadow: Do you like taking care of others, or do you prefer being care of?B O T H

Fuzzy Duckling Yellow: Is there something from childhood that you haven’t outgrown?sleeping with the stuffed animal my dad got me one Christmas when I was like 9

Brussel Sproutlet: Do you have any unhealthy habits?nail biting, picking at my fingers, chewing my lip, smoking, biting my oral piercings, not remembering to eat or drink solely because I simply forget and can’t feel that I’m hungry or thirsty

Razzle Dazzle Rose: Describe an ideal date.a nice lil cafe, or sittin by the fire and watching stars. alternatively, going for a drive to god knows where

Periwinkle: What’s something ordinary that has personal meaning to you?the handmade cards my friends and fam have given me for special occasions. like, it really means a lot when someone gives me something they’ve made

Mauvelous: Do you think you deserve a better life than you have now?eh, debatable?? I mean I certainly deserve to be able to afford basic needs and medications and such

Blueberry Blue: Do you get sad easily?y e a h

Purple Mountains Majesty: How does someone earn your respect?by literally just being someone who isnt and asshole honestly

[janzz]

day 3: its 3:47am on day 4 and i forgot to write my daily post

really really really trying hard to make this a habit (just for april)

so fail but lol

here’s my post for today

i went to a yoga class tonight in santa clara and it was the yogi’s first time and she was so good omg!

not quite as good as my fave instructor of all time (the bae lauren at moxie yoga in sf)

but yeah kimberly at corepower santa clara square might make me a regular!

(which honestly is super great because i went to class with norma and it was awful LOL)  (she played like hardcore edm at a chill class??) (to be fair it was also a level 2 class and i was struggling a little and kimberly’s class was a level 1....)

(oh i went to whole foods in the same plaza right after and ngl im starting to really enjoy just physically being in those fancy ass supermarkets.  i went to a new to me nob hill after orangetheory surprisingly also in santa clara ----theyre just nice and clean and beautiful.  however spending $45 to get way less stuff than a 99 ranch or something still feels way wrong.  i got bananas cashew milk chia seed refill 18 brown eggs (anthony likes the brown ones idk) natural deodorant (cause native has been sucking hard) ginger tofu mushrooms orange juice fancy sprouted bread shredded cheese actually ok when i list that all out its a decent amount for whole foods.  the stuff is just smaller yknow like the presliced white mushrooms were $1 for easily like 3 or so oz less)

anyway i find this funny because when i started dating anthony in 2015 he would go to nob hill markets and always claim it was his favorite market (because the chicken he would buy from there would never go bad etc).  i thought he was like idk rich af -- to be fair he went to stanford 2x and has his masters and is 2 years older so yeah he is definitely more privileged than me.  like i didnt have a preference for cage free brown eggs like i never had the money to spend the extra $1 or 2 on that shit when i was slaving at starbucks AND a second office job.

its really weird how money changes your life.  its 2019 and i finally hit the 100k 6 figure mark.  it’s honestly been a STRUGGLE to get here, but i’ve learned a lot along the way -- primarily that you HAVE to negotiate and generally just get paid more to improve your life.  anyway yeah money doesn’t solve problems but it generally reduces  your mental calories and makes things way more convenient.

before when i was poorer, i would have to go out of my way to make sure i was getting the cheapest shell gasoline in the area (still gotta have standards and not give into that arco bullshit).  i would never go into whole foods or places like that because my dollar had to stretch further.  whenever i would go out with friends before i’d have to be SUPER mindful of what i ordered and i would be EXTRA annoyed when you go out in a group and when splitting venmo people wouldnt pay the extra gratuity and i’d factor in me covering it because as a barista and server its bs when ppl dont tip well

now -- idgaf if i go out to eat a lot or splurge when im out w friends.  dropping $50-$100 randomly cause something is on clearance at lululemon is not a big deal.  im not anal about my boyfriend and i splitting everything exactly 5050 down the middle cause meh whatever i dont need to be given money back for like the minimal difference.  if whole foods is convenient for me to go to after a workout ill go in without batting an eyelash.  

it is weird tho being poor and then having money -- like ill go to lululemon but absolutely CANNOT buy anything full price.  i still like watching movies but 99% of the time go on discount days cause spending $20 when i could spend $9 feels wrong.  whenever i do basic things with my boyfriend, like going to the grocery store or mall, i’m most definitely the most cost conscious -- checking against the value per oz, whereas he just picks whatever and gives no thoughts to it (i think he makes like 240k a year thereabouts, definitely more than double but i dont know the specifics).  i drive a 2015 toyota corolla le he drives a nicer but still affordable more luxury sedan hyundai sonata souped up with seat warmers navigation and he’s installed a dash cam and stuff.  my car is definitely a commuter car that’s just one level up from the s basic model.  when i htink about buying a new car i dont know if i could buy a lexus but yet i sometimes think about getting a tesla instead of a prius

another weird one is getting mad at myself for leaving reusable grocery bags LITERALLY in the trunk and then having to pay the $0.10 per bag.  I’ve easily spent at least $15 on bags prob.  Before i would be kicking myself hard cause i’d need to pinch pennies.  another thing that ive noticed makes me feel “rich” is i can sustain my craft coffee/boba habit just fine and not give a fuck.  before i got more mindful of it i htink my my coffee boba budget was like $100 a month.  ive always loved craft coffee, but it has to be RIGHT if i was gonna spend $6.  when i was living w my parents in san diego going to a new coffee shop and driving up to encinitas or whatever was like THE trip. now i get philz off my mobile app whenever i head out of class or if im feeling like it and its not that special

but yeah, im not rich by any means but it was huge to go from like $16 an hour at my office job/$15.70?? w/ benefits I think that was my starbucks shift supervisor rate/annual salaries of 20k ish to $39k at a law firm in downtown sac (grossly underpaid but at least rent was only $300 at a family friends) back to the law firm job up to $70k.  there i got a raise at the same job from 70 to 80k and then 80k to 86.

THEN cause i was privileged enough to have been able to save money making more when i hated my job i just up and quit (i think i had like no more than 5k in savings at the time --it wouldve been more but i spent 3k on prk/lasik).  anyway yeah i was lucky af and got a new job in a month -- and the offer for this job was 100k base, 10k bonus, some amount of stock (i still suck at this stuff) and a stupid amount of perks like $1000 gym reimbursement and basically free health insurance -- if i annualize all my pay+perks, assuming i get my full bonus, its prob like 120k.

so i have like 5x ed my income in 4 years since graduating from college.

the crazy part is people that were more privileged than me STARTED at 100k as new grads, including 401ks and what not.  im lucky becuase i started mine back when i was 18 at starbucks.

income inequality and access to knowledge/resources has become something ive become more aware about and passionate about over time.  me and my boyfriend clashed a lot earlier i think because we literally were in different planes of our lives and income levels.  we’ve been together 3 years, but have known each other for 4.  we broke up for 1 year in between -- and yeah ngl had i never improved myself or actually reached my income/earning potential we likely would not have gotten back together.  additionally him supporting me when we got back together raised me out of not the poverty level but yeah we met and i made 39k.  i took the plunge and moved out to sf for myself and lets be real for him too and made 70k which was a huge jump.  and in a short 15 months or so i jumped again to 100k base.

im never gonna make as much as he does (men/women blah we can get into that) but yeah even having access to money adjacently is so powerful.  anthony never outright gave me money and im too much of a hardass independent person that ive NEVER borrowed money from him, never intend to.  i really vehemently despise the idea of free loading but because of him just being around yeah my life has been improved.  

when we met in 2015 in our young 20s we were in our have fun phase.  i was too poor to have gone to thiings like coachella or out to a concert.  he got me into music and made it easy for me to experience because he’d buy the ticket, drinks, pick me up and pay for sf parking.  i would likely get dinner ahead of time or something small and generally we would switch so if he got tickets one time i’d get them next.  but he ALWAYS paid for drinks and lets be real the occasional not drinks :P he had introduced me to music in such a way that i was willing to drop $800 or so on coachella + car camping + take pto days even when we were broken up 10ish months or whatever it was the first time we dated but if you think about it he likely dropped at least 1k on me during those 10 months without batting an eye lash.  i made 39k at the time working in downtown sacramento and he made 90k base (maybe 115k total comp) living in SF.

despite just basic things like me being immature for 23 -- a big reason i think we broke up at the time was the income level inequality.  it was both our first jobs out of school (first job out of stanford grad for him, he immediately got his masters out of undergrad).  i did a round of uc davis, community, uc davis.  

he told me he was breaking up with me because when we met i had originally wanted to be a lawyer and then didnt end up pursuing that path and he saw it as a lack of ambition/drive.  what he didnt see was general growing up and not having access to lawyers as i grew up, just me working at this really top tier A+ law firm and feeling out of place as an asian woman working with rich WASPs.  me wearing pencil skirts and having major impostor syndrome.  what he did end up seeing was an insecure version of myself in our relationship with me bending over backwards to make him happy.

when i moved to sf and made 70k it definitely was a huge ego boost to make that additional 30k, but to be real, here in sf and paying more rent than i was in sac and SD/just general living being expensive 70k wasnt that much.  what it did for my confidence though was priceless (i was an ea to a ceo at a tech startup).  i really grew into myself and was more confident in my abilities -- and honestly a lot of that was just getting older and knowing that i was good at things, bad at certain things and i wasnt going through my quarterlife/post grad crisis anymore.  

then those raises to 80k and 86k made me more ballsy.  these things were obvi practiced with anthony as i had a partner to discuss and practice with/an educated thought partner.  at this time anthony was making $150k base or so (after realizing he had been grossly underpaid as a PM for the 90k initial salary)

all of this set me up to basically make my position what it is now AND for it to be 100k.  tbh im a glorified low level coordinator at a big company.  i honest to goodness for the first three months probably worked a total of 2ish hours a day? this role should probably max out at 90k.  and by max out i mean this role likely shouldve started at 75k with incremental raises to get to 90 in like 3 years.  i STARTED at 100 and can likely if i play my cards right be promoted to a program manager in a year (or less).  that’ll prob bump me to a base of 120 or so if i’m aggressive.

i always shitted on sf when i moved here because i hate the tech bros, the elitist ppl, the vcs who think theyre out here changing the world but seriously being surrounded by people that went to ivy leagues or the UC’s that were better than mine have honestly, like my boyfriend, just uplifted my status.  something as small as casual lunch time conversation being more intellectual makes a huge difference for me re: how stimulated i feel and how much more energized ive become because of ppl around me.  i def still have impostor syndrome all the time but its been so much growth from 23 to 27.

30s should be great because ill be well into my career by then and making even more and closing the gap even more w my boyfriend.  its funny too cause hes 29 now AND FINALLY getting that postgrad quarter life crisis.  his privilege was able to offset him to have this crisis later on in life where he made more money and could make smarter choices.  privilege really is the thing that keeps on giving and im grateful to have started poor and really appreciate it.  as i make more money i also care more and more to give back.  if i ever do run for office in my 50s or whatever im gonna push for more access to education and arts.  i had an interest in this as an undergrad but couldnt pursue it because itd be a lifetime of poverty, but yeah who knows.

dang this went long but it is really interesting when i think about money and how much its effected me.  im lucky i was able to raise myself out of the level my immigrant parents brought me and my sister to.  them moving out of the philippines was the best thing that ever happened to me.  the second is them fronting the bill for my university education.  the privilege i have is extremely special and important and i want to honor their sacrifices because im sitting on a 100k because of decades of hard work and frugality on their ends.

im fucking lucky.

we gotta pass on the resources and uplift those around us if we are fortunate.  

...another rant altogether but i wish the leadership in the United States thought the same way. 

(end: 4:36am, why do i do this to myself)