#i love the way other queer people express love

[howlsofbloodhounds]

So glad someone else sees the weirdness of people being gross about fem body nightmare it always comes off as somewhat fetishy too bc they reduce him to just being hot

Yes! Absolutely. Seeing the weirdness not only in how nightmare is treated, but also how killer is treated! If he supposedly respects his boss, then why the hell is he drooling over him and treating him vastly different just because nightmare has tits now?

I also see this a lot with female killer or feminine killer—female killer always has huge breasts and small waist and it hardly seems like killer. Even when it’s just normal killer wanting to dress or express himself more feminine, it makes me uncomfortable when it’s done in an overly sexual manner for no reasons?

And of course nightmare and killer are adults, so there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being attracted to them or writing/drawing them in adult situations with eachother or others, it’s just that it feels very fetishized and hyper sexualized to have characters drooling over nightmare when hes just existing and also has breasts.

Even with killer as he is now, vastly hypersexualized as a character for not even any real reason either. He only flirted like once or twice in his canon drawings, clearly as a joke even and mostly because people asked rahafwabas to draw those things with killer, and yet it somehow became his entire character. Not to mention how people took “flirty” and “romantic” and immediately went “lustful creepy pervert.”

To the point where people just cant seem to let these aspects of killer’s character be just that; aspects, something interesting and fun, but not his whole entire character.

Don’t yall find it interesting to explore how a character who views themselves as emotionless and is dissociated from themselves and their actions most of the time navigates things like physical intimacy?

Especially when this character has very likely not felt any kind or comforting touch that wasn’t just a way to keep him further manipulated and controlled? How his experiences with abuse and torture and control have become so normalized it taints every aspect of his life, from the ideas of consent to the idea of boundaries.

Can he even feel much sensation that is too gentle, would it send him reeling in discomfort and disgust at first. would he hate how his body reacts even if it’s something that feels good—wouldn’t he feel viscerally unsettled if someone could provoke bodily reactions like flushing cheeks or a beating “soul beat” or even genuine arousal from him.

wouldn’t he think with contempt if his body reacts positively or negatively to receiving comfort. wouldnt he try to find a way to maintain control and detachment because too much stimulation or stress or feeling threatened or trapped or controlled or afraid for his safety and life could trigger higher stages and he lashes out and literally could kill his partner(s) because his mind mistakes the situation for something else. wouldn’t he need a level of either trust or control to willingly engage in something that feels deeply threatening.

Anyway i got off topic, but you’re absolutely correct. I love female or feminine Sanses, especially with the apple twins, and i don’t think there should be any need to hyper sexualize and fetishize the female body. (especially if these feminine/fem presenting or female bodies also happen to be trans/queer bodies; such as with transfem dream.)

like just let nightmare exists as nightmare, regardless of if he happens to have breasts or not—and don’t have his subordinates drooling all over him and behaving super strange just cause nightmares got boobs now.

(and I also don’t wanna see any situation where nightmare who usually doesn’t have boobs has boobs one day and the gang make a big deal about it, since nightmare is a shapeshifter and all. he could realistically just decide he wants boobs one day and the gang could just go “interesting. Anyway..” and hardly even that.

unless it’s to like, ask for today’s pronouns or something, i don’t see no need to comment on the breasts unless in the context of, nightmare is engaging in intimacy with their partner(s) or something. a context where it would make sense. Anyway just be normal about female/fem killer and nightmare please.)

[void-star]

I may be aroace, but I'm queer first and above all.

If you spot somebody on tunglr dot com talkin shit about how they're a sex-repulsed ace or romance-repulsed aro and some nonsense in fiction or fandom is oppressing them, they are essentially using their personal disgust to censor and control other people the same way people try to do that shit with dark/heavy/taboo fiction.

I am uninterested in sexual relationships with other people. I can have some strong, aversive reactions to people making romantic or sexual advances towards me. I carry a lot of heart break about amatonormativity and the social notions and expectations of relationships. And I'm also a fully grown adult living in a world that expects dual-income households at minimum.

I'm not upset about the presence of romance plots or sex scenes (personally, I love them, but I want them to be better written so that they are part of the character study). I don't want aroace representation in the form of characters who are never desired romantically or sexually, or who come out only when they are rejecting someone's advances and then never brought up again.

Like the sex scenes and romance plots, I want them to have depth and exploration and fullness.

And that fact alone is starting to feel incredibly isolating and alienating as some of ya'll drag this further and further off a stupid ass cliff.

[uncanny-tranny]

How do you set boundaries with ppl about attraction. I’m a binary trans man and I prefer people who aren’t lesbians and/or people who are exclusively attracted to non-men attracted to me, but I feel awkward telling people to not be attracted to me

I think part of it is making it clear what your identity is, honestly. And I'll be honest, it can feel weird to know certain people are attracted to you, I totally get that. However, I'd definitely encourage you to try not to look too deeply into it. Attraction is weird, it can manifest in weird ways, and sometimes it isn't even necessary that the person attracted to you will... do anything about it.

There are definitely ways to set that boundary that can be... crass, I suppose. I'd encourage you not to do so, such as antagonizing people solely for being attracted to you. I find that simply causes more conflict and heartache for both parties. Now, if the person is trying to force you into a relationship, that's one thing, and I'm not talking about that.

I think a simple, "I'm very flattered, but I'm a trans guy, and I'm not really comfortable or ready for a relationship like that" can do wonders. Like, I totally get where you're coming from, but I want to emphasize that many times, people attracted to you aren't doing it inherently in bad faith. Attraction is something you can't really prevent or stop. You can make it clear what interactions you want, but it doesn't invalidate your manhood if somebody is attracted to you, y'know? That's something they don't have power to do, and I think knowing that can make it easier to say to yourself, "they might be attracted to me and that doesn't change anything about who I am."

I hope this makes sense. If somebody doesn't respect who you are after that, then that is on them, not you. You aren't required to explain yourself further. You aren't required to reciprocate if somebody expresses attraction.

[fitzrove]

tag rambles

[unidentifiedprimate]

sex scenes are literally so boring to me. characters start having sex and it's like... great, how much precious runtime is this going to waste? i would get exactly the same information from one second as i would from three minutes of this.

there are a billion other, more interesting ways for characters to exhibit love:

a light touch on the arm. making someone's drink exactly how they like it before they ask. the unique shorthand people use when they know each other well. one character subconsciously mimicking the speech or mannerisms of the other. lighting up when the other person is happy. simply acting more relaxed - speaking smoother, gesturing bigger - in the presence of that specific person and not anyone else. so so many tiny gestures, tiny expressions, that all mean i love you i love you i love you.

[skrunksthatwunk]

pulled aside by my father to watch a homophobic k&p sketch and just had to sit there like 😬 and then when i explained it was homophobic he was like "i fear for your sense of humor". christ alive

[typicalnoise]

god i love women so so so so so so much

[drchucktingle]

this was a comment on one of my post from a recent live event. it was photos of joyful queer buckaroos celebrating together and proving love is real through creation, community, and a trot of love. most important I AM LITERALLY IN PHOTO AS A REAL FLESH AND BLOOD HUMAN

it got me thinking about how DEEP AND VICIOUS the irony poisoning of these early internet communities goes. the way buds like this cannot fathom someone just being a sincere person unrelated to their OWN old days of cynical posting. it is fascinating, and i will admit, sad too

despite a DECADE of work, countless live events, 350 tinglers written well before large language models were a thing, there are still people who cannot imagine someone like me could exist. it is a strange place to be. not just part of me, but my entire EXISTENCE is often gatekept

it is easy to say ‘well chuck your art IS strange’ but honestly i think it is more than that. magical realism is common. there are stories about dinosaurs and bigfeet and unicorns. this scoundrel reaction is about two unspoken things: my art is neurodivergent, and my art is queer

heres the thing: I WILL BE FINE. what concerns me is not an issue of MYSELF, it is a concern for the other young outsider buckaroos who see comments like this one and think ‘is that what they will say if i express MY unique way? will i be dehumanized like this at every turn?'

i will be honest, i cannot say that WONT happen, but i CAN say this: for as deep as this irony poisoning goes, it is slowly dying. the way i was treated at the start of my career is LIGHTYEARS DIFFERENT from the way i am treated now. there is a massive shift towards sincerity

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY. to young artists trotting up, the things that i am harassed over and doubted for and made fun of for are NOT tangental to what has made me successful, THEY ARE LITERALLY THE SAME THINGS THAT HAVE MADE ME SUCCESSFUL. YES I AM STRANGE, WHAT OF IT?

the things that you tuck away for fear of a review that says ‘there is a PROBLEM with this art because it has always been done another way’ THOSE ARE YOUR SUPERPOWERS. the gatekeepers want you to tuck those parts of yourself away because THEY TUCKED AWAY THOSE PART OF THEMSELVES

never forget that your unique way is PURE UNFILTERED 100 PERCENT ROCKET FUEL. it will stick out (maybe, if you are lucky, scoundrels will even say that someone like you could never actually be real), but sticking out isnt so bad when you are waving the flag of love.

in fact, when youre waving the flag of love, sticking out is pretty dang cool. what are flags for, after all? LOVE IS REAL BUCKAROOS. thank you for reading, and if you enjoyed this long post then please consider preordering BURY YOUR GAYS.

LETS TROT

[genderqueerdykes]

the point of my masculinity and male positivity posts are to underline that masculinity and manhood are seen as a threat or in direct opposition to queerness, and that often times in order to be seen as queer you have to be partially or wholly feminine or gender neutral, or express your manhood in a feminine or gender neutral way in order to no longer be threatening, invasive, or a problem.

it is very difficult to exist in queer spaces as a hyper masculine person & a man. you're made to feel like you need to walk a tight rope feeling like you're inherently out of place, as if you existing and being masculine or a man in queer spaces makes others uncomfortable inherently.. just know that when i make positivity posts it is to remind us all that masculinity/manhood and queerness are not opposites and that you do not have to be a feminine man or masc person to be viewed/seen/heard as queer.

chasing men, masculine people, and masculinity out of queer spaces isn't helping anyone currently and won't help anyone down the line. please accept masc enbies, butches, bears, and masculine trans men with the same kindness, love, and passion that you do neutral and feminine people. that's the point when i make these kinds of posts. thank u

[giritina]

I think a lot of people who get into discourse about it/itself pronouns or other niche queer expressions of the self like neopronouns miss that these things are supposed to be subversive. They see someone saying to call them pup and think that person must not see the absurdity. They see someone going by it and think they are unaware that that sounds derogatory. Like these actions would not have meaning if they were normal and not absurd or unsettling. The person using its doesn't need you to insist that that pronoun is never derogatory in its defense... I'd be shocked if it wasn't choosing that pronoun because it sympathizes and loves and lives in the space of the derogatory. Some of us are maligned and strange and freakish. Some of us are unable to escape being identified as other. We all find our way of navigating that life, some people are not going to choose to do it in your way. When they choose those pronouns they're asking you to participate in humanizing the derided. I think that's a great thing to be invited into

[happypotato48]

This Is A Gay Asian Rant About BL Comments Made By Some Queer Westerners I See Sometimes.

So you know of those gays (usually white) that made dumb tiktok dancing to list of countries that legalized same sex marriage and list of countries that discriminate against LGBTQIA+ poeple as a way to say something racist. yeah i kinda got the same vibes from some comments regard how asian BL is homophobic just cause they don't live up to queer western standard. look, i'm not saying that some BLs and their creators don't deserve criticism regard how they capitalized/exploited queerness for an easy cash grab.

But people need to understand that Asian countries despite recent progress are still very much culturally conservatives. so when people says that thai bl is homophobic and all the characters looks like bunch of straight guys, which is true for some olders thai BLs i'm not gonna denied that. but after all this time and newer BLs generally being very queer and most of creators being out queer themself and poeple still making these comments, i'm annoyed.

And don't get me start on the actors. you don't know them! why are you making assumption and calling them queerbaiter just cause they acts in bl. like maybe they're straight, maybe they're not but what they're definitely doing is making queer content for you know, queer people here. so when you made halfass comments about their sexuality what do you think that made other queer people who still in the closet feels. and when you add the nationality to that, "these thai bl pair are this and that, this korean actor is so ungrateful for his bl past", etc. when our societies are still very much still in progress regard LGBTQIA+ acceptance. it make us living here feels fucking awful like somehow we're lesser queer than people in the west just cause we don't have citibank at pride or some shit.

And the shittiest in my humbled opinion are comments regard censored chinese bls. people do know like, that the creators making these bls are risking their livelihoods for this. that these shows getting make at all are miracles. yes it sucked that they're censored but they're still very much queer shows making by queer people who want to express thier queerness despite the chinese government being the chinese government. when people dimissing these shows as not belonging in queer media, you're also dimissing their creators and audiences as not belonging in the community.

Look what i want to say is that we're trying our best over here, and maybe our best are not up to your liking. the ways we talk and express our queerness maybe still can be perceived as problematic by western queer standard. but these media are our house and you're the guests. for people aren't shitty we appreciated that you're here engaging and loving our media, this is your home too and you're welcome in it. i can speak for myself that i very much love being here on tumblr and interacting with people from all over the world who love BL. but for people who are being shitty sometimes about asian bl.

YOU'RE THE GUESTS, BEHAVE!

[cosmicconversations]

Lilith in the Signs

I have to say that I find many Lilith sign descriptions to be… overly dramatic. Depicting so many of these placements like they make you some dark demoness of seduction who possesses someone’s soul. Very exaggerated stuff. I think the only people who might identify with that have Lilith very strongly placed in their chart and, even then, it’s still a bit much.

Lilith is not all about sex or even darkness. It definitely can be these things. But, it is more so about an inner power that you have the potential to embrace. It can be sexual because sex has a very powerful impact on others. It can be dark because if you suppress your power, it becomes your shadow self and has a destructive impact. Lilith is meant to be brought into the light yet we might have to confront fears or anxieties or insecurities to do so.

Think of Lilith as the sister of Uranus and Pluto. She is formidable and daunting like Pluto and also defiant and rebellious like Uranus. In order to embrace our Lilith, we have to go against the grain of convention and societal conditioning. And some of this involves the patriarchy. It’s my theory that Lilith tends to be more visibly expressed in women and queer people. Straight maleness has historically set the status quo, on mental and relational and sexual levels. Anything that goes against that is seen as dangerous.

Lilith embodies that danger, which is why it can be liberating or thrilling for women and queer people to embrace their Lilith yet terrifying and uncomfortable for straight men (so they often project her on to a wife or girlfriend or women altogether). Even certain queer men could struggle to tap into Lilith if they have unaddressed inner misogyny. Actually, any one could, of any gender or identity. Lilith is a feminine force that demands respect.

As the original femme fatale, is Lilith bad or is she just drawn that way? Maybe if we learn to see this chart placement with more nuance and less theatrics, we can understand her true expression in our lives. You could say it’s “dark feminine” energy but a better way to put it would be “wild feminine”. The yin expression that can’t be suppressed or controlled.

Keep reading for the Lilith sign descriptions

Lilith in Aries: Learning how to accept your rage. It’s okay (and healthy) to get mad and to stand up for yourself. Putting yourself first without guilt or fear. Totally embracing your high sex drive, which could mean doing it ALL the time with a partner (who is compatible enough to keep up) or having a very active sex life while single. Being very upfront about what you want sexually. Not caring about what is considered masculine or feminine. Embodying or being drawn to feminine energy that is very athletic and aggressive and assertive. Not being afraid of rubbing people the wrong way by winning, including anyone who you date. Feeling completely comfortable with being single and focusing on yourself

Lilith in Taurus: Having an unapologetic drive to make money and lead a comfortable life. Embracing your love of nice things, without caring about being seen as shallow or materialistic. Wanting stability in all respects and not seeing that as “boring”. Total comfort in your body, sensuality and physical pleasures. Being greedy, in a good way, when it comes to sex: more foreplay, more orgasms, doing it all day or all night. Embodying or attracting feminine energy that is either very artsy and earthy or very luxe and glam. Idealizing an Old Hollywood feminine aesthetic, like Marilyn Monroe or Elizabeth Taylor. Never settling for less than you are worth, no matter who it angers or disappoints

Lilith in Gemini: Accepting that you have an inner “evil twin” and letting that other self or alter ego loose on a regular basis. Finding the fun in a certain amount of pot-stirring or shade-throwing. They can call you a lot of things but they can’t call you boring! Possibly exploring or embracing bisexuality/pansexuality. A huge emphasis on keeping one’s sex life fresh and interesting. A major tease: knowing how to flirt and entice then withhold or switch up. Exuding or being drawn to feminine energy that is mischievous, witty and smarter than they let on. Either being androgynous or acting overly feminine as a clever ruse to hide how shrewd you are. Being the kind of chaotic and smart-ass presence people either love or hate

Lilith in Cancer: Breaking the generational curses on your mother/maternal parent’s side of the family. Having a fierce mother figure yet being unafraid to stand up to her or set boundaries. Accepting all of your emotions and moods, no matter how messy they are. Using sex as a way to emotionally connect instead of avoiding that vulnerability. Potential crying or emotional release during/after sex. Exuding or drawing in feminine energy that is soft and emotionally available yet has a ferocious side. Embracing your “mama bear” energy (regardless of gender). Willing to destroy whoever messes with your loved ones. Being called crazy or gaslit for your valid emotions but owning and expressing them anyway

Lilith in Leo: Having fierce/formidable children who teach you how to be more authentic or stand in your power. Learning how to not be so worried about being “appropriate” and express yourself spontaneously. Expressing your talent or your light unapologetically, no matter who is threatened by it. Embracing a healthy amount of ego. Being told you’re not talented or special but proving them wrong. Seeing sex as a grand expression of passion and fun. Fully enjoying the validation of being sexually desired. Embodying or attracting feminine energy that is vibrant, sexy, fun, and charismatic. Admiring famous feminine figures and adopting their mindset for greater confidence. Seeking your own form of stardom or the spotlight and not feeling like there’s anything wrong with that

Lilith in Virgo: Accepting the part of you that is critical or judgmental and channeling it toward useful or productive things. Holding yourself and others fully accountable instead of allowing excuses for poor behavior. Building your daily schedule around sex or making it a reliable routine. Developing a slew of special sexual techniques to enhance the experience (for you and for them). Expressing or being drawn to feminine energy that is humble, helpful, intelligent yet very no-nonsense. Learning to reject the idea of being or having the “perfect” feminine person. Working for others yet still not taking anyone’s shit. Knowing when people are judging you for petty or unimportant reasons and not letting it affect you

Lilith in Libra: Knowing that you can be a kind and thoughtful person without being pushed around or taken advantage of. Having major “I’m really nice but don’t fuck with me” energy. Using your beauty or charm to get ahead in life, without worrying if it makes you vain or one-dimensional. Embracing your sex appeal and the effect you have on your preferred sex. Being a very giving sexual partner but demanding the same treatment in return. Embodying or attracting feminine energy that is very beautiful, graceful, artistic and engaging. Either an open love of “girly” things, no matter what others think, or secretly loving feminine pursuits/things and learning to be unapologetic about it. Knowing what you will not put up with in relationships and being unafraid to be alone. Becoming a good partner to yourself first

Lilith in Scorpio: Not being ashamed of your intensity or your dark side, even if others find it intimidating or off-putting. Taking your power back and not letting anyone rob you of it again. Accepting your potential to be obsessive or go to extremes and finding the right outlet for it. Embracing your raw sexual energy and the magnetism/power it brings. Seeing sex as a very transformative and very intimate experience (for both people). Expressing or gravitating toward feminine energy that is deep, alluring, enigmatic and powerful. Seeing the feminine principle as something terrifying or intoxicating (or both). Trusting your intuition when you detect insincerity, manipulation or hidden motives in others, no matter what they say. Surviving toxic or abusive situations/connections and learning how to avoid them. Embracing your esoteric or occult interests and gifts, even if others judge you or call it “evil”

Lilith in Sagittarius: Being the one in the room who isn’t afraid to speak the truth or call things out. Fighting back against anyone who tries to restrict your freedom and independence. Enduring religious trauma that makes you unafraid to call out the hypocrisy or bigotry of organized religion. Sexually liberating yourself in whatever way you see fit. An adventurous attitude toward sex and willingness to experience many different sexual things. Exuding or attracting fiery, free, bigger-than-life feminine energy. Seeing feminine figures as positive/uplifting influences. Going against the expectations of your culture (whether it’s your nationality or ethnicity). Disowning the place you come from, running away and not looking back. A refusal to “settle down” traditionally or slow down as you get older

Lilith in Capricorn: Prioritizing your career first and making sacrifices in order to succeed that others may not understand. Establishing an image and reputation according to your approval, not anyone else’s. Refusing to emulate your dad or paternal parent’s example and success (or lack thereof). “Disobeying” your father figure as you get older. Only respecting authority figures who are worth respecting and disregarding those who aren’t. Exploring dynamics of domination and submission via sex. Working through an equal amount of sexual compulsion and suppression. Exuding or attracting feminine energy that is very “girl boss” (regardless of gender). Defying or fighting gender norms in your career field. An image or legacy as a barrier breaker

Lilith in Aquarius: Learning how to detach from a need for social validation or approval. Feeling cool and confident even when you’re treated like a weirdo, an outcast or unacceptable. Refusing to be made to feel less than because you’re a woman or a person of color or in the queer community. Having friends that are considered controversial or polarizing or being judged in this way by those in your friends’ lives. Either a strong sexual pull toward odd people or being the one with unconventional allure. Having either a really wild or very clinical approach to sex. Seems very much like one gender but feels the total opposite on the inside. Embodies or draws in a very feminist energy in a defiant or activist way. Achieving popularity and social goodwill in spite of being aloof or unsociable or erratic on a regular basis

Lilith in Pisces: Refusing to accept the boring and limiting aspects of life. Knowing you have the power to create your reality, even if this seems delusional to others. Using the path of art or spirituality to reject a traditional lifestyle. Having ten different personalities and not being afraid of expressing them all. Not needing to have a fixed sense of self and being a chameleon instead. Making art that allows you to express your hidden sexual desires. Living out your sexual fantasies via role playing. A love of porn or fan fiction or other forms of erotica. Embodying or attracting feminine energy that is either ethereal and magical or siren-like. Having a lot of ambivalent and confusing feelings about the feminine principle. Being at peace with others’ projections on you and seeing the insecurity or unhappiness that causes it. Only needing to be truly understood by a select few

(Lilith in the houses descriptions coming soon!)

[rivetgoth]

I feel like part of what’s kinda wild to me about the weird “born in the wrong generation but in an alternative 80s punk goth queer way” crowd that idolizes this nonexistent 80s that was like a goth alt GNC queer safehaven is that without fail every time I actually talk to older goths or other older alt people or even just older queer or nonwhite people who were actually there in the 80s they’re IMMEDIATELY like “oh you were NOT missing out hahaha.” Like at best the coolest things they’ll talk about is getting to see some OG alt bands live in their prime or getting to see a cool movie in theatres, that IS genuinely cool, like major jealousy to anyone who got to actually witness Skinny Puppy or Ministry live in the 80s ykwim, but literally ALL of these people will then immediately start talking about how much people sucked, how much mainstream culture sucked, etc. It was literally Reagan-era AIDS crisis. Dystopian literature took off for a reason. Racism was a massive society-wide issue. War on drugs was in full swing. Even just the insanely racialized pushback against disco during that time is of note tbh. Massive brand commercialization was getting worse and worse. Whenever I talk to gay people from that era they express so much relief about how much the world has improved since then. I was talking to an older woman in her 50s who’s been in the goth scene since the 80s who was saying that back in the day if she went out dressed in her goth clothes she was called a faggot on the street. I remember her jokingly being like “well at least they were saying it to me and not actual gay people I guess haha…” There are aspects of 80s culture, especially 80s subculture and counterculture, that I really really enjoy, obviously, and certain sentiments surrounding big art trends of the time that I love, but it’s just kind of ridiculous to me that YEARS after collectively mercilessly mocking the trend of white girls saying they miss the 50s while ignoring the fact that Stonewall and the civil rights movement hadn’t happened yet, no-fault divorce didn’t exist, and lobotomies were still acceptable, I’m seeing posts nearly daily on this site that are like “well if I had been born in the 80s art would be good and music would be good and there’d be a queer alt community for me, but instead I was born in the tiktok poser generation 💔” like girl I’m sorry but you ARE the tiktok poser. Get offline and go FIND your community. Your issue is not that you were born in the wrong generation, you literally just do not know how to find modern underground subculture. Because it is underground.

[sp0o0kylights]

Indie horror filmmaker Eddie Munson, high off his first big (underground but notable) success, knows the movers and shakers of the film world have their eyes on him. 

They're just waiting to see if he was a one hit wonder before they open all the doors he's been trying to kick down. 

His next upcoming film is his chance, his shot at finally making it. Of being like Rob Zombie and the other creators he looks up to that masterfully blended metal and horror. 

This is his golden ticket. 

The project starts off smooth. His last success has greased the wheels, and things fall into place faster than ever before. 

He's got the best idea for this insane haunted house story, a true "mazes in mazes" type of deal with a queer twist. A real look at how a place can haunt a person just as easily as a ghost can.

 Everything's going swimmingly--until one of his leads drops out the day they're due to start shooting.

No call no show's, and later, Eddie will find out the guy got a last second call back to be a contestant on one of those Love Island bullshit romance gigs (and laugh his ass off when the main love interest takes one look at Billy Hargrove and goes on a five minute rant about ugly mullets on national television) but right now? 

He's fucked. 

He's called in every favor he has for this film. Maxed out every credit card he owns, tapped every contact, got on his hands and knees and begged his rising star journalist best bud to help him market it. (Which Nancy agreed too, for way less cash than she should have.) 

 Eddie can't get anyone on the phone, much less find a replacement actor and the amazing place they rented, that is so dark and wonderfully eerie, is booked out the rest of the year as an AirBnB. 

If he doesn't film now, he loses it all.

Cue the other lead, unknown theater actor Steve Harrington, watching his hair pulling, tire kicking, 'cursing and hopping while holding a toe' mental breakdown and asks why Eddie himself doesn't act in it. 

"Just go full Kevin Smith man. Act and direct." He says, with an easy grin. 

Jeff, Eddie's tried and true videographer, trades glances with Gareth and Grant (Eddie's long used special effects and makeup team, who double for about twelve other jobs because they're also his best friends and they're all in this together, make or break.)

"We don't really have a lot of other options." Gareth hedges. "You're already using me and Grant as background characters." 

Eddie, hands fluttering around his face as though trying to wave away this entire situation, squeezes his eyes shut and lets out a pained hiss. 

"Fine, fine!" He announces with the air of a man running towards a fire. "Fuck it, this is our one shot and so help me I will be shooting it!" 

Steve politely hides a laugh with a cough. 

"Chuckle all you want big boy, I'm going to tragically romance you so hard people will forget both of our characters actually live." Eddie snarls.

Steve, the handsome bastard, just winks.  "Looking forward to it." 

Eddie blushes, but hides it with a surge of frantic energy, conveyed by lots of yelling and moving and getting the ball rolling. 

Two days later, Steve would give the performance of a lifetime down on his knees, covered in a literal pound of fake gore, booty shorts and nothing else as he sobbed about how a lover could become a home. His hands clawed at Eddie's jeans before resting a tear stained face on a slim leg as he bent his body towards Eddie like it hurt to be away from him. 

Eddie would later receive equal praise in his own acting during the scene, with the world and every reporter in it asking how he conveyed an otherworldly panic so beautifully throughout Steve's performance. What was he thinking, to evoke those expressions on his face? 

The way his own pale hand, unmarred by blood and acting as a metaphor for the plot, would come to stroke Steve's cheeks.

Eventually he'd come up with a smooth polished answer that cheekily pleased his audience, but nothing would ever come close to the truth. 

("Eddie I've known you since grade school." Jeff said that night, a scant few hours after they'd wrapped. "You can act man, but not like that." 

Eddie made a wild "shut up" gesture, looking frantically over his shoulder before admitting; "You saw how close his face was to the prince of darkness!? I was seconds away from popping a boner next to his lips, in front of the 4K camera!” 

Eddie bounced into Jeff’s face so he could hiss: “He fucking had his chin on my thigh, Jeff, and I am only a man. A mere mortal!" 

"So we're gonna unpack all of that later." Jeff said finally, when he'd managed to get his mouth working and Eddie back out of his personal space. "But dude, we've talked about you calling your dick the prince of darkness." 

Eddie flipped him off.) 

One year later and critics named Corroded the best horror film of the year, praising the camera work, practical effects, and how there wasn't a soul alive who was surprised to hear Eddie and Steve were dating after their explosive on screen chemistry.

No one ever quite understood the prince of darkness jokes or why Steve mentioning it made Eddie blush, but that was a secret to find out later. 

Today on WIP’s I have no intention of writing, indie horror movie AU!

[rowenablade]

Okay. I’m going to wait to do a second watch before I articulate most of my other feelings here, but I want to address one thing.

I’m seeing a lot of posts like, “I related to Izzy because I am also queer and older/disabled/depressed. By killing him off, the writers are saying that I deserve to die.”

Guys.

I’m not saying your feelings aren’t valid. I totally understand grieving a character that you relate to. But speaking as a writer, I just want to point out that trying to write with the shadow of “what is the absolute worst and most harmful way a reader can interpret this” will smother your ability to create. Twisting yourself in knots, trying to think up the worst-faith takes possible and scotch-guarding all your writing decisions against them is exhausting to the point of making you just not want to write anymore.

And we’ve seen the writers deliberately choose not to do this in Season 1. Remember all those terrible “Izzy is racist” takes that the writers and cast seemed completely blindsided by? That happened because the writers and directors and actors weren’t going over every scene with a fine tooth comb, ferreting out every shot or line of dialogue or micro expression that could possibly be interpreted as racist, and scrubbing it off. Because there comes a point where your story is what it needs to be, and you have to accept that some people will interpret it in ways you didn’t intend them to. And if you can’t accept that, you’ll never find the courage to put your work out there.

The point of diverse casts and writing teams isn’t to achieve a state of, “Nothing bad ever happens to a character from a marginalized demographic ever again.” It’s to achieve a status quo of these types of characters just being people in the world of the story. Not symbols, not representation boxes to tick, not tokens that you can point to so that you can say, “Here, we acknowledged this type of person exists, now where’s our woke points?”

OFMD is full of characters of color, queer characters, older characters, characters of differing body types. And in stories, things happen to characters. Some fall in love. Some make the same mistakes over and over. Some turn into birds. Some die.

Izzy’s character represents a lot of things, but he does not represent every older, disabled fan or fan who has struggled with suicide, any more than Jim represents all genderqueer fans, or Olu represents all black fans. That’s not how the writers were handling him. They were handling him like a character, because that’s what you have to do.

Again, I understand being sad. I am so, so fucking sad. But this idea of, “Any time something bad happens to a character I relate to means that the writer thinks I deserve these bad things to happen to me,” will poison everything you engage with eventually. Because stories are full of things happening to characters, and they won’t all be good things. And the more representation we get, the more often bad things will happen to characters we relate to.

But good things will happen too.

Queer couples get married. Disabled women run off with their favorite husbands. Middle-aged characters change careers. A multiracial polycule finds a home at sea. A fat man covered in tattoos stars in a drag show and all his friends cheer. All these things happened in the same show as Izzy’s death. This is what this world is.

Anyway. I know emotions are running high and I’ll probably get blocked or unfollowed by a few people for this. But I’m just trying to find my peace where I can, and if anyone else finds this useful, cheers.

[deconstructthesoup]

I've been thinking a little bit about how the Cat King expresses his affection, and specifically, how the fandom interprets it.

There's some people who see how he interacts with Edwin and think "oh my god, he's such a simp, Edwin really has this sexy catboy wrapped around his little finger," and there's some people who see how he interacts with Edwin and think "yowza, learn to take a hint, he's not interested in you and your fuckboy fur coat," which, y'know, are both valid. I love the Cat King, but he's clearly not a fan of boundaries---outside of his own, of course.

Which... is the point, isn't it? Because here's the thing---we all like to analyze the Cat King as if he's human, but... he's not.

He's a cat. And that's how cats are.

Let's look back at his first interaction with Edwin. Our sassy Edwardian boy has used magic on one of his cats, and he's pissed, because cats are protective over what they consider "theirs---" and seeing as he's the Cat King, all of the cats in Port Townsend are his. He's bitchy and rude, cutting Edwin off when he tries to explain himself, and doesn't exactly seem like he's a merciful guy.

Then comes the moment where he whisks Edwin away, and he gets a closer look. The Cat King realizes that he's handsome, he's clearly queer, and that there is something fascinating about him. So he gets closer, he gets intimate, and it's working. Even in the throes of internalized homophobia, Edwin's getting into it, and... the Cat King self-sabotages, slapping a binding spell onto him.

A cat hisses at you when you attempt to reach out your hand and reason with it. It changes its mind, and it comes up to you, purring. And just when you're about to scratch it behind its ears, it freaks out, scratching you on the hand.

Sure, right after that, the Cat King lays out the terms---the binding spell (which, honestly, is actually a pretty fitting punishment given that Edwin used a binding spell on that cat) can be taken off, "and I'm sure we can work something out." That's a line that's probably worked before, and that's a line that probably could've worked, but the damage is done. So the Cat King gets irritated, sneering at Edwin's "old-fashioned sensibilities," and gives him your classic trickster seems-easy-but-is-a-lot-harder-than-it-looks deal. And we don't see him again for a couple episodes... at least, not until Edwin gets that little cat-scratch at the lighthouse.

When a cat scratches your hand, you give it a wide berth. Even if it immediately changes its mind and meows for attention, you don't trust it anymore. So it gets pissy, getting more and more annoyed the more you ignore it, until it gives up and bites you when you won't give it pets.

Now, the Cat King has realized that Edwin's getting close. He's counted almost all the cats, and it won't be long before he completes the task and books it out of town. So, the Cat King starts flirting even more, even going so far as to mimic Monty and Charles if that's what it'll take. When that fails, and when getting Edwin to open up fails, the Cat King lets out a nervous little laugh and tells Edwin that he's way off, when in fact he couldn't be closer.

Once a cat realizes that it likes you, it becomes incredibly needy. It trots along after you, it begs for attention and love, it sits on your laptop and jumps up on the kitchen counter and will attempt to insert itself into any and all activities you might be doing. And while that may be the cat's way of expressing love, there's no denying that it is ignoring all of your personal boundaries and generally getting in the way of you doing anything---other than, of course, paying attention to it.

And then comes the moment in the forest. The Cat King shows up with a fancy chandelier to blow Monty's cover---why now? Because Monty isn't just a romantic threat, he's trying to do something that'll take away Edwin for good. Once the cover's blown, and once Monty storms off, the Cat King uses this as an opportunity---I just saved his life, maybe he'll notice me now---and Edwin snaps, dropping one of the best lines in the whole series.

This is the first time, mind you, that Edwin has really pushed back. He's been resistant before, sure, but he's never said or done anything that indicates that he really wanted this dance to end. And I don't even think the Cat King realized that he was crossing a line, had been crossing a line since he slapped that bracelet on. But when Edwin says that he's not the Cat King's toy to yank around, that he's nothing more than an inconvenience, that's a big old wake-up call for our boy---and of course, he takes it horribly, snarling after Edwin that he'll be stuck in this town if he walks away, that he'll stop playing nice, just fucking NOTICE me already why don't you?

There always comes a time when you're fed up with how invasive your cat's being. Maybe you've just had a bad day, maybe it's genuinely messing up something important that you're doing, but you break out the spray bottle. And how does it respond? With a hiss, with a scamper away, and with a baleful glare over its shoulder. It knows it's done something wrong, but it doesn't fully understand, and it's mad at you.

Afterwards, Edwin gets dragged into hell, and that breaks the charm on the bracelet. And the Cat King's left to think.

There's some conflicting emotions there, of course. He's moodily playing with the bracelet when Esther shows up, showing that he probably does care, but there's still something to be said about how he immediately calls Edwin a "tease" and hates himself for being willing to wait for him if and when he ever returns from Hell (which is very noble of you, Thomas, totally way more of a meaningful gesture than actually going down there to get him back---which, as a self-described eternal being, would probably be easier for you to do than Charles. Just sayin'). But as much as I love to clown on that, the Cat King does die in that scene, and it's only after that that he spills to Esther.

This, I think, is where the Cat King stops acting like a cat, and starts acting human. Because he doesn't go and see Edwin when he gets back---he's realized that he kind of was in the wrong, and he's giving him space. And I'm sure it can't have been fun knowing that Edwin and Charles only got kidnapped by Esther because of information that he let slip.

But when the boys and Crystal (and maybe Jenny) are about to leave, the Cat King visits Edwin to pay his respects to Niko. He gives Edwin a lily, which several people have pointed out is fatal to cats. He's still flirty, sure, but he's more understated now. No more tricks, no more spells. Just him. And that's the version of him that gets that little cheek kiss goodbye.

Because even cats can learn that there's a better way to love.