#i mean i dont think he does it all the time. its occasional. he smokes two and a half cigarettes a month

[puzzlekinq]

a typical edward meal is like 4 ibuprofen a pack of fruit gummies and half a cigarette. his favorite recipe

[hanasnx]

(if this makes u uncomfy in any way plz ignore)

idk if mj exists in SW ‘verse, but like—sex with ani while ur both high as kite?? BIG YES (from me at least).

esp cause!! it would probably heighten ani’s force sensitivity?? like he’s feeling high and tingling and extra touch sensitive and all of a sudden you’re touching him and he’s getting a rush of emotions, floating, hungry, hot, i love you i want you.

and you. you look like heaven, like every sin he’s ever indulged in, all flushed and glowy and smiley, touching him with a fluttery touch.

ani needs you when he’s high cause there’s something almost spiritual, almost heaven scent and hell touched, about the rush of you he gets in every way.

as a former pothead i think i've gotta set some records straight. long post about marijuana + fucking + anakin under the cut <3

warnings: marijuana, negative + positive for anakin experience with marjuana

when i was smoking enough for a circle and then playing whatever videogame was in my ps for 20 hours a day, i can say that it did nothing but make me hungry, my attention span elongated, and my anxiety non-existent. i wasn't interested in fucking, i was mostly into wasting away while naked. it didn't do much (that i can remember) for my sense of touch.

i do know that when i did fuck while high, it wasn't a remarkable experience because i don't remember any of it. nor did it make me horny or add to the sensation. those kinds of effects were from an entirely different drug that i did that i dont feel like putting the trigger warnings for so i wont talk about it

pot is definitely good for mellowing out, chilling, and fucking really casual. and i mean really casual. that's my experience with it anyway i have no idea if its diff for other ppl, im sure ppl who arent demisexual and have higher sex drives than me can say different who knows.

for anakin, i can see him smoking and fucking. definitely. in very specific circumstances. let me lay those out for you:

he smokes very occasionally for spirituality reasons. he does it respectfully, with great care. a big stickler about it. he wants to emphasize to himself it's not for recreational or social reasons. the jedi discourage drugs that cloud your judgment. marijuana is frowned upon to rely on for things like calming yourself or meditating because you should be able to do that alone. however, it's not frowned upon to partake in it every once in a while. it's all about new experiences and as long as you treat it with respect, it's alright. anakin treats it with the utmost respect.

he does not care to be under the influence of something. being high or drunk is a very rare form for him indeed. he gets very uncomfortable when on something, and especially uncomfortable being reliant on something, so when he is smoking he does it alone most of the time. he does not like being disillusioned, and he certainly does not like the idea of someone's no-nonsense idea of him being shattered.

he's led a ceremony with younger people of the order. taught them how to partake, how to roll, how to use it mindfully. and if someone is having a negative first experience, they had too much or it does not agree with them and it gets into their heads, he knows how to calm them.

when he smokes with you, it might be a rare moment of rebellion. a "i'm an adult, i can smoke a little weed." moment. and even with that notion, his darkness may catch up to him. the guilt of using it under different circumstances than usual may put him in a bad place, memories he pushes back into the reaches of his mind creep up. his past with tatooine, the tusken massacre, etc. he gets paranoid, those doubts you couldn't love a monster like him get the better of him. it gets in his way. and you're there to lead him back to the present. like op said, "you look like heaven" he'd hone in on you. tunnel vision.

anakin's way of calming himself is often self pleasure. and so since youre here, and willing and able, he might use you to guide him back to the present in a more physical way. he can't think if he's inside you, all he can do is chase his orgasm. he's tingly, he's got those nerves in the pit of his stomach, he's trying to ground himself using you and at the same time fuck you out of this world. however, with marijuana you're both slowed, and clumsy. the love-making wouldn't be coherent, or poised, but it'd be enjoyable. less concerned about what you must look like, and more cuddly. more shallow thrusts, and humping ruts, and sloppy kisses and no dialogue.

[doodle-do-wop]

Kesler and Juline where cannonly childhood lovers, I think Juline had a temper and a hard time controlling her ability, and that Kesler was her alchemy tutor and wears dorky glasses similar to Milo Thatch. 

Do you have any Kesline headcannons thoughts anything at all

I’m working on a kesline teen fic and you have posted about them like three times in the last month which is more than most people do, yes there is a slight possibility of any of your head cannons ending up in the fic if they fit

Hi ya!

I have so so many headcanons

Elves show affection with loved ones (best friends, family, lovers, etc) by pressing foreheads together. The longer it lasts, the deeper the affections are.

Friends and family will do it for about the same duration as a normal hug

Lovers and friendships that are beyond love will obviously last longer.

Also I love childhood lover trope and that is canon now, Shannon is wrong. They were childhood lovers. Juline nearly failed her mid-term so badly due to her somewhat newly manifested Froster abilities being affected by her emotions making the beakers freeze over. It was a whole thing.

Kesler and Juline had known each other for years, like years!

Kesler fell first, Juline phased through the entire planet falling for him

Juline has had a fascination with human stuff for ages. Kesler just thinks it's funky but if Juline's blabbering about floppy disks he doesn't care what a 'computer' is, she's talking and he's listening.

Juline has constantly cold hands, Kesler holds them to keep her warm

Kesler likes baking, its like alchemy but you can add as many tart berries as you want, say less

Eda makes awesome pastries, Juline makes...interesting soups

will you survive? Will you need an elixir? Is it moving or is it just the smoke giving you hallucinations?

Jokes aside, Juline likes making soups that dont look appealing but taste amazing

its a prank and a good meal

They like to dance occasionally to some of their favorites (human music included) and will drag the kids into mini dance parties (this does mean Dex can dance, i eat canon for breakfast)

(once again ignoring canon) Kesler has slightly more rounded ears than most elves, Juline's are pretty pointed

they've cried over Gnomeo and Juliette (they're just like them fr)

Juline used to be shorter up until their third year of Foxfire, the girl shot up like a goblin i swear

Like how Dex shot up in Nightfal (i think) Juline was just tall

Random Juline and Kesler Firefox hc under cut, I was too proud of them to let them stay in the drafts shelf

Juline

peak annoying little sister

youngest of three

her and Eda are the only ones who kept in touch

their eldest sibling has always been distant so there was never really a connection between Juline and them

her and Eda shared a room up until their second level of Foxfire, they were just that attached to the hip

neither of her parents are Frosters, her mom is a Conjure like Eda but her dad is a Guster

Eda is older by just two years meaning she manifested first with Juline buzzing to manifest next, hoping to either be like Eda or a Guster, maybe even a Hydrokenic or maybe one of her great great grand somethings will do her a solid and-

she manifested as a Froster

she was not happy about it

kept freezing everything, left little frosty footprints everywhere, brought the room temperature down constantly no matter how wrapped up in cloaks and tunics she was

tying this into your headcanon of Kesler being her Alchemy tutor, Juline nearly flunked her alchemy midterm, scraping by the skin of her teeth

she had been docked major points for frosting some of her tools and even putting out the fire she needed multiple times due to nerves

Now onto Kesler

- as the youngest of his family, Kesler has at least three people telling him what to do at all times

- and none of them could agree

- he and his siblings were born more or less close in age (if you count close as 4-8 years)

- his youngest older sister was in Foxfire along with Kesler which means whenever Kesler had any trouble in class she was right there to both brag, and help (it was her job to be both unhelpful and very helpful, it's sibling law)

- Kesler got his love and knack for Alchemy from his grandfather who wasn't too shabby himself but Kesler was a natural

- he loves his siblings but hanging out with his grandfather doing random alchemy experiments was just their thing

- Kesler was terrible with Elementalism so much so his sister would occasionally take the long route to her classes to check on him in the Healing Room

- you could tell if Kesler Dizznee was within twenty feet of you if you could hear the tell tale sound of glass rattling in a bag

- he was in the same class year as Juline (I ignore canon) so when Juline Dizznee needed a tutor guess who was signed up as the sacrificial lamb

[hearteyedbunny]

what if i take questions from this ask game and answer them about arty bc i just want to :)

What is their biggest regret?

i mean this...is obvious. but...even though it isnt his fault, he regrets allowing his family to enter that vault. he blames himself for a long time, wondering what he couldve done differently to prevent it, even tho there was nothing anyone could do :(

Who (or what) are they emotionally closest to?

Danse is the obvious answer, but Art is also very close with Nick and Preston. i suppose i could count Hancock too, but they are just kind of casual friends who get drunk together sometimes. i think Art considers Nick a kind of...father figure, of some sort. Nick was the first person to really be empathetic and helpful towards his situation with his family, and ever since then he's confided in Nick and considered him a very very close friend, despite Danse's disapproval.

also dogmeat, of COURSE. Art loves that dog SO much. he was sad when he joined up with the BOS and found out he couldn't bring dogmeat with him, so he leaves him with Nick until after blind betrayal, when Art can bring dogmeat with him and danse to red rocket :))

How do they feel about physical touch / affection?

it depends who it is. if its someone he isnt close to, even if theyre an acquaintance, then no he doesnt want to be touched at all. he tends to guard himself from others...but if you get close to him and he considers you a friend then he will gladly accept a hug or casual touches. Nick probably pats him on the back or lightly grips his shoulder sometimes, and Art appreciates that. and of course he and danse are very touchy, but Art probably initiates most of it since he feels so safe with danse

What faction(s) do they despise?

HAHA, the brotherhood. he hates being a part of it. he hates the rigid rules, the military-esque way of life, their bigoted beliefs, and their self righteousness. he thought he left that all behind when he left the military back in his own time. ive said it before but hes only a part of the BOS because he knows he'll be protected while hes with them, they provide him food, water, shelter, etc. and they allow him to investigate the institute and take it down. being exiled from them sucked, but at least he doesnt have to answer to anyone anymore.

What are their thoughts on chems and alcohol?

big thumbs up babey!!!!! for real tho i think at first he tends to use chems and alcohol (especially alcohol) as a way to cope when he first gets out of the vault. he doesnt know what else to do, really, or how to handle his emotions and his grief. it never becomes a problem, as he eventually breaks out of the habit, but everyone aboard the prydwen was used to seeing him drunk and shambling about a lot of the time.

after BB he still drinks occasionally, but danse makes sure to keep an eye on him and make sure it never gets out of hand :)

and i dont know if this counts but he does smoke cigarettes as well. i think hes been doing that since before the war. pre-war he was probably trying to kick the habit, and he was doing pretty well until uhh.........[gestures to everything]. hes trying tho.

[spaceagebachelorstan]

rtc headcannons because ive fallen deep into this musical

noel drinks from wine glasses and exclusively wine glasses

ocean has a fringe/bangs but doesnt know how to grow them out so she just pins them up with headbands

ricky has so many badges its a problem at this point. just buckets upon buckets of badges.

i am making them all autistic bcs im autistic and i need more autistic characters damnit

ocean has a special interest in politics and literary analysis

noel has a special interest in france, poetry media analysis

sometimes they discuss different films and books together and yes they get very heated over their wildly differing interpretations

ricky (obviously) has a special interest in space and cats, but also video games.

constance has a special interest in autism itself, flower language and art history

penny (be aware i have not seen legoland yet so take this with a pinch of salt) has a special interest in animals and mythology

mischa has a special interest in horror and rap, as well as linguistics

noel speaks pretty good french. he uses duolingo but he hates the notifications because they annoy him at the most random times

ricky uses all pronouns, no preference. and by all, i mean ALL. you could bring out the boink/boinkself pronouns and shed be chill with it

constance really likes hot chocolate with cinnamon and two shots of caramel in it

penny has mild heterochromia. one eye is green and the other is a darker green with a brown rim

ricky has an aac, but they all know at least basic sign language. theyre still learning

ocean stims by bouncing on her tiptoes. one time she fell over in the middle of a big speech because she tipped forward. she was fine but very embarrassed. noel was no help

noel's mother is from a french-speaking provenance/precinct (i think thats what theyre called)

mischa owns two hats, but flips them inside out so it looks like he owns more

noel has tried white wine. he doesnt want to admit it but he absolutely despises it

penny has textural issues with anything slimy. she tried a facemask once and almost broke the wall from slamming so far backwards into it.

mischa has talia's number memorised, but still keeps a litle slip of paper in his phone case with her number on it

ocean colour codes EVERYTHING. if even a single colour is out of place on anything she will spend ages trying to fix it

everything noel owns is very low contrast, and most of it is some variation of dark, desaturated reds and blues or monochrome

ricky owns a pair of purple cat ears

ocean isn't one for sweet things but adores chocolate oranges.

most of the time they all eat lunch together in the choir room

penny is a vegetarian bcs she doesnt like the texture of meat, ricky is a vegetarian because hes allergic to red meat

when ocean found out noel works at taco bell she spent a week going up to him at work just because. she still goes occasionally. noel dies inside a little bit more each time

noel actually managed to convince some other kid to day the second line in the nativity play. hes still proud of that one

mischa really likes rasberries

ricky loves to sleep in hammocks, but its a pain getting in and out of them so they dont do it often

noel's mother owns a lot of old french dvds which is how noel got into them

constance is very good at playing instruments, like harmonicas and flutes.

noel used to buy those fake sweet cigarettes all the time and pretend he actually smoked. he didnt like the flavour though. too chalky

mischa really likes palma violets.

penny doesn't watch movies often, but when she does she asks a lot of questions

noel really likes dramas, but he doesn't say so that often

for a bonding activity they all made bracelets for eachother, but none of them knew how. they picked who theyd make the bracelet for out of a hat. ocean researched before hand and made a nice flower chain for penny. penny made a green singlet with star beads for ricky. ricky made a red bracelet with "bad egg yt" on it for mischa. mischa made a purple and white bracelet for constance. constance made a black and red bracelet with a rose charm on it for noel. noel made an orange and blue bracelet with a shell charm and the word "lake" on it for ocean

penny wears hers and constantly fiddles with it. ocean keeps hers despite being annoyed by the word. mischa wears his often, but its slightly small so hes very careful to make sure it doesnt snap. noel keeps his on his bedside. ricky wrapped his around one of his crutches. constance wears hers often as well, and keeps it in a small box specifically for the bracelet.

noel stims by rubbing his fingers and fixing his collar

ricky has made an entire map of the solar system zolar is on. zey made it on a giant piece of a1 paper and hung it by his bed

ocean is scared of boats. the irony is not lost on anyone. however noel is also scared of boats, so he doenst make jokes

penny eats paper sometimes. not often, but often enough to concern the choir. she prefers plain and hates tissue paper

noel owns a large notebook for his favourite pieces of poetry/writing to be written in. it has a large design of roses and skulls on the front and is on a fancy textured cover. he keeps it in pristine condition and has shown exactly two people that it even exists. his mother and mischa

mischa sends noel song clips to review and noel sends him poetry snippets

constance and penny spend evenings at the cafe together, they do their homework there and they talk for hours once shes finished

penny and ocean are actually pretty close, those two and constance sit together in most lessons and convince the teacher to put them in a three for pair activities.

noel knows talia is real and they're actually friends. mischa is glad they get along and someone else believes shes real.

this led noel to learning some ukranian and talia learning some english to avoid the hells of google translate

ocean began learning french to spite noel but actually quite likes the language

constance really likes the count of monte cristo

mischa canmot finish books for the life of him. he begins reading, gets bored and remembers twelve weeks later he even knew of the book

there is a singular shitty library in uranium in st. cassians. its old and decrepit but the librarian is nice.

ocean volunteers after hours in the library on thursdays and fridays

ricky and penny watch animal documentaries together. they also spend a lot of timw with rickys cats. penny loves them

noel has tried that french whipped cream hot chocolate and loves it

ricky doesbt like throwing away her clothes so they sew the holes up with penny and ass little patches on them.

constance and penny read together and penny likes to help constance in the cafe with things like sweeping and clearing tables

mischa and ricky are bros. they watch sci fi together, and tend to watch a lot of scifi horror

noel and ocean hate eachother in the "you are genuinely so insufferable. i never want to talk to you, no, i dont even want to see you again. of course we're still on for saturday i'll meet you at ten, see you there" kind of way

penny dyed her hair blonde and noel dyes his hair black. his natural hair is a pretty dark brown but he likes his dark dark.

the choir hang out every saturday. they do things like hang at the cafe or go to the mall.

in an everyone survives au, none of them like cars that much after the rollercoaster

post canon penny hosts memorials and told talia about what happened. she was devastated, but penny felt she needed to know. she also managed to stop taco bell from making the hungry hombre meal

noel cannot stand fast food after working at taco bell because hes seen how its made.

noel is friends with a coworker, a woman in her late thirties who knew his mother briefly in highschool.

ocean cannot handle spice at all. she can barely hold her own against the lowest spice rating on a nandos menue

ricky talks to noel about zolar and all xeir ideas for it. noel is fascinated by just how detailed and extravagent it all it, so he ignores the sexy cat people

ricky convinced the rest of the choir to watch cats. there is now a mandatory background check before each movie on movie nights

ocean wears a lot of yellow and blue

because of oceans oarents, she has very limited internet access, so she normally uses a laptop her parents dont know about, courtesy of constance, at the cafe

constance writes fics on ao3. not often, but she does. shes pretty good at it ngl

noel's mother actually gave him the monique wig

when asked for a self portrait noel gives two- one of monique and one of him, often side by side

will probbaly do more later, maybe focused more on shipping and identity bcs i wanna make one on that

[quickunfinished]

Oblivion

Sometimes when i wake from daydreaming everyone is gone. Like everyone just vanishes. Il be in class and one second the crowded lecture hall is loud, but i loose myself in my thoughts and im suddenly alone.

Its not just that too, every time this happens everything seems open almost. Like one time i was daydreaming in class like i mentioned earlier and the next second everyone was gone. Just vanished.

The lights were dark and the only light was creeping in through the windows, and the hallway lights were on too, so I decided to get up and start following them.

My shools hallway cant control which specific lights go on and off, so it was strange to see specific lights go on, lighting a path for me to go along. To the right, down the hall, up the stairs, past the 3rd floor bathroom, and out the roof exit.

Ive never been to the roof, but i imagine its flat, with occasional outcroppings with airconditioning units, vents, etc, and i imagine the sunset must be stellar up there. I used to love the sunset before my daydreams started. Everytime the sun started to set it always felt like there was a demon behind me, always just out of sight, leering with an invisible hatred. And as the sun sets in these dreams i always get more afraid.

I start to feel the demon take over, my feet walk on their own, my hands pull out a cigarette i didnt have before and lay it in my mouth. Eventually im always just on the edge of the danger. One choice away from oblivion.

This time it was different. I didnt expect the demon to look like me. In old media demons were always naked, with fire and brimstone. In modern media they always had suits and ties, with eyeshadow. In yesterdays trance a man who looked exactly like me joined me on the edge.

I can feel the hatred lying behind his eyes. A veritable pot of suffering and rage, directed at anything and everything which can be discribed as having wronged him, or even nothing at all. Even if he is polite he is not kind, there simply isnt an ounce of joy, laughter, or anything positive behind those eyes. The only thing behind those eyes is pure hatred.

"Need a light friend?" He says as he lights my ciggarette without asking. He pulls out one of his own and lights that too, the flame crackles and hisses, and the heat radiates back at me, warming my face against the cool breeze.

He takes a puff and says "so what the fuck are we doing here then? Why are we here?"

Im quiet for a minute. "Im not so sure myself. I suppose i got here myself. One foot before the other." I say, before taking a long drag of my ciggarette. The light flares up, and the tar filled smoke fills my lungs.

"You had it good you know" the man says "you fucked it all up yourself."

"I know that" i say "i tried my best though, that has to count for something right?

"Hell does that matter?" He asks in a way that makes me think hes not asking, hes dismissing. I take another long drag of my ciggarette as he continues "Its the consequences of your actions which count, and the consequences of the things you have done vastly outweigh any good youve done"

The sun is getting lower and the sky is a brilliant blood orange. I say "i threw every fiber of my soul behind recovery. That has to mean something." I look down at the ground below, my feet dangle off the edge as i do.

"It means you failed, and you created more suffering in the world." He says. I take a 3rd drag, as the ciggarette shortens. "You out all that mental torture, all that anguish into making pitiful gains. And for what? So you could fail again and create more suffering? Shameful"

I take another drag. The ciggarette is down to just the filter now. The man gets up and walks back inside from the roof. "Theres an easy way to fix all of this. You would prevent so much suffering, and you are responsible for the actions you dont take."

Then i woke up. Back in class, like nothing ever happened. This is the farthest one of those dreams have ever gotten and ive had a pitt in my stomach ever since then.

Hes right too. I know he is. And i feel myself almost marked for slaughter, living on borrowed time. I dont want to die, but he has a convincing argument for joining oblivion.

[silverrstarrr]

◇Headcanons of modern AU of Eren.

Warning: weed, drugs, nsfw(this comes when he hit high-school/university)

Primary school-Middle school ‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• Im sorry but Eren seems like the kid who was musty as hell.

• The kids around him would ask, "who's musty bro?" And then they'll sniff everyone and say its Eren. But I mean, they're only kids and they're not so big on hygiene.

• When people would accused him of being the one who's musty, he'll be so pissed off and get defensive. "what the HELL?! I'm not the one who stinks.😡"  just imagine how aggressive he sounds.

• Eren later on realizes he stinks and doesn't want to be made fun- starts putting on deodorant, yk yk.

• In middle school, he was pretty popular but he didn't know it. Despite his little anger issues at times, he's really sweet and outgoing and pleaseee don't get me started on his little smileeee. Most likely girls fell for his smile.

• Most likely he used to the term "the boys 🥶❗🤙" during middle school as well 😭 Especially when like girls wanted to hang out with him or he'll tell his mom this when she wanted him to do something.

• He really liked hanging out with Mikasa and Armin. I feel as if they would go to parks and find things, bugs, watch animals etc. Mikasa would tag along as a supervisor lmao.

OKAY TIME FOR HIGH SCHOOL EREN

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• During his freshman year, he was not popular at all. I feel as if he stayed with Mikasa and Armin a lot- he didn't really talk to a lot of people. Cause yk, freshman new people new things but Jean and the others(I feel like Connie and sasha would be popular for being stupid asf 😭)  kinda got them popular

• Later on he gets really popular and a bunch of girls start talking to him. I feel as if he's a flirt but doesn't realize it until he sees you all flustered or smiling a lot.

• Most definitely he started smoking in his Junior year of high school.

• Eren would smoke weed, vape, hit blunts, I don't think he's the type to eat edibles a lot. But maybe there's a test, he'll pop one right before. He would do gravity bings blunts and glass bongs and he would roll his blunts himself and occasionally buy them wrapped.Most people knows he smokes. He's not the best with keeping it down-low, especially when he's smoking with Jean.

• His smoke circle? Most definitely, Jean, Connie, Reiner, Annie, and Armin. Mikasa would just be there yk.

• Eren is greedy with his weed, it depends on the person for him to share. Most likely he'll share with you ;)

• Eren most DEFINITELY flirts with you when he's high, he'll get really close to your face and would be smiling like an idiot- flattering you with compliments.

• Jean finds this annoying and would flirt with you before Eren could(just to piss him off).

• If you're a beginner, he'll purposely give you a fat ass blunt and laugh his ass while he sees you cough for 5 minutes.

• OR he'll give you an edible(that has a high dosage) and watch you complain about it not hitting. "Eren, are you sure this works? I don't rea—" bam it hits and you end up tripping up the stairs while eren is just Busting up laughing cause he's high asf too.

• Maybe you're experienced? Eren would smoke with you alllll the time. Or he'll invite you to smoke with Armin and them.

• He blows smoke in your face.

• He's the type of get horny when he smokes, so he may get touchy with you. But doesn't get any further cause, I mean PEOPLE ARE AROUND?? LOOL.

UNIVERSITY EREN.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• Still smokes. I forgot to mention this but I dont think Eren is that smart? Don't get me wrong, when he puts his mind to it- work hard, he can get things done and pretty well. But he doesn't get things right on the first try/time like Armin and Mikasa does. He'll need a little bit more explaining to.

• Some how got into the same university with the rest of the gang

• HE GOES TO PARTIESSS, LIKE PARTIESSS.

• He's not a light drinker but I feel as if he'll be too busy making out with girls than putting his lips on a red cup, drinking up.

• Most of the time, he'll approach you if he never seen you before. Or maybe he's seen you once or twice on campus and wants to slide in ykk.

• When you guys meet, most likely he's slightly high.

• You guys hit off automatically, he's just naturally charming and he's attractive.

• Maybe after when you guys get to know each other more, he'll ask to come over to your dorm.

• This can 1 or 2 ways, y'all just have fun or you guys make out and fuck.

• Half of the time when he comes over, he' smoking in your dorm.  Of course he asks if he cans but you allow him to.

• As I said before, when he's high- he's hella touchy and horny. So be prepare for him coming up behind you, grabbing your waist and kissing all over your neck. Leaving small hickies here and there.

• He most definitely convinced you to get LD lights.

• Eren thinks it sets the mood and plus he likes it when he smokes(most likely they're on red duhh).

• He also plays music in the back as he's smoking in your room. It's not too loud, you guys are able to hear each other talk at least. (He'll play chill RnB, or chase Atlantic, blackbear, Brent faiyaz, Travis Scott, Don Tolliver. But I see him listening to chase Atlantic mostly. )

• Depends on if you smoke or not, Eren would make out with you with smoke in his mouth. He thinks its hot and it is

• Eren would like for you to sit on his lap, (facing him or not)

• His hand slips under your shirt and start playing with your breasts. In response you start grinding against his cock, which he'll end up moaning in your ear and BOOYYY WOULD THAT GET YOU HYPED UP.

• 9/10 you'll end up topping him because he gets needy.

• When he's coming down from his high, he wants to cuddle with you or have your fingers running through his hair. He'll get bitchy if you stop.

SORRY IF THIS IS SO LONG, I LOVE THIS MAN TOO MUCH.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

Bonus:

• You know how LD lights bring in bugs right? You'll be yelling for him to kill it and he does but what he does next?😭 he'll grab a tissue clean it up the corpse and chase you around with the dead bug.

• for me, I know my ass would run and be yelling for him to stop and most likely he'll mock you: "eren stooopp"

[partangel]

As I have never before met a person who actually uses a pipe to smoke—may I ask, what drew you to using one?

i have started smoking pretty soon as a teenager (if only rarely) but i am not a heavy smoker at all, a pack of cigarettes lasts me two to three weeks and my rolling tobacco lasts me well over 2 months. to answer truthfully, which is not the same as answering in cool manner, i have always associated the smell of tobacco to simple, better times. my mother hasn't smoked since i was a child, but i remember fondly as a kid the times, which many consider gross, of indoor smoking in public spaces like shopping malls. some of the happiest memories i have of my childhood are definitely of going to the shopping mall to grab something to eat, with my mother and her best friend, when they were still both living wildly their late 20s, and smoked while having their coffee and mini-sized chocolates. my mother is now strongly disgusted by cigarettes and does not know of my habit.

the same way i have kept these fond memories of my mother and associate smoking cigarettes with happier times, i will always keep the fond memories of watching the lord of the rings series, as a child, and looking up to the figure of gandalf. that is a fairly easy sentiment to relate to, i think. for me, gandalf was the all knowing whimsical wizard with a niche, his fireworks show. i looked up immensely to the way he carried himself: always full of valour, with the saviness that only he has. ultimately i think that, as someone who has always wished to be wiser and kinder and able to help others, gandalf was the ultimate sage. so... when one of his first appearences in the movies is with a long pipe between his teeth, smoking amicably, while riding a wagon... only to be followed by more pipe smoking in which the smoke is manipulated into shapes and circles... well, its only natural it caused such an impression on me. i did not even know, at the time, that pipe smoking was made with tobacco, i had no idea about anything! i guess i just thought, man... when i grow up i hope to have a big pointy hat and a white beard and the biggest pipe in the world!

i guess that sentiment has never left me: of wanting to replicate a little the figure of gandalf in my own life and manners, of being a little wiser! it is only a little bit awkward to admit it to the general public... but children are definitely the most impressable and i think that my smoking habits are generally very well explained by it. this probably sounds a little off, but i do not mean it badly, particularly because i am not addicted to smoking and i dont think i will ever develop that addiction - for me its just a relaxing, occasional activity!

and i can also share that pipe smoking is not easy at all! im saying this because, as i am still learning to properly smoke one, i have discovered that pipe smokers in general do not appeal to me at all! so your question is actually very curious... all the youtube videos i have seen are of men with the american flag on the background with military objects and i hate it so much. i have seen one recently that promptly told the camera that "women cannot smoke a pipe because they dont know how to be quiet, therefore they dont know how to appreciate it truly". it saddens me deeply that the pipe niche is so right-wing male dominated. when i think of pipe smoking i think of gandalf the grey, not some unpleasant, clearly brain lacking fool. if i did not have this long lasting impression from the lord of the rings, and i had seen the type of community that is associated to it, i think my stand on pipe smoking would probably be very different from what it is now! its definitely very interesting the way perceptions are molded.

alas, pipe smoking is still something i am finding my ground on... i am in no way close to the ability displayed by ian mckellen. but i will... probably without the help of internet pipe smokers, though. onwards to making pipe smoking a savvy wizard activity, i say!

[rosyerim]

bad boy au | na jaemin

na jaemin, the notorious playboy of his school

literally flirts his way out of trouble

his english teacher caught his cheating during his test and what did jaemin do? wink and slide the paper up his sleeves

“ah you must be mistaken i would never cheat on a test! esp w a teacher as pretty as you ♥ ~(◠‿◕✿)”

cue the teacher blushin and letting him off and jeno laughing at him getting caught

part of the dreamie squad obviously 

the whole group of them are absolute hearthrobs

but jaemin is like the leader ever since mark graduated ot7(╥﹏╥)o

whenever he walks down the hall or into class, guaranteed the students are squealing and highkey blushing

i mean who isn’t, jaemin is a god???

he’s also known for playing around w girls and boys

its never too serious as jaemin always cuts it off when if they say i love you

homeboy isn’t about that committed life

which sucks for the ppl he has a thing with

because he treats them so good

always taking them out on the cutest dates, to the newest cafe, the aquarium, the ice cream shop even simple dates in the park!!

 pulling out their chair for them, holding the door open for them all that gentleman ish!!

but they always want more from jaemin

jaemin is known to be affectionate w his own friends but he’s never done any pda with his flings

which confuses them bc??does jaemin like me?? 

the answer is; no

despite what he says while flirting he rarely means any of it, he just likes the reactions he gets like,

when he compliments them and they turn red

or he holds their hand and they get all shy

but he loses interest in them as quickly as he gets it and is quick to cut it off

which does make him a bit of an asshole in that sense

but he does it in such a nice way they can’t get mad

he also dyes his hair so!!much!! 

how hasn’t it fallen out yet!!!

also kind of a stoner

psa; dont do drugs kids if ur underage!! this is just an au!!!

he likes to get faded behind the abandoned carnival the dreamies have dubbed as their hangout

its rlly just a closed down amusement park thats rlly old and they just spray painted DREAM on everything they could find but the dreamies love the eerie feeling they get in ther and like to pretend they own it

AND theirs no cops around so they can do what they like

which usually means getting crossfaded or having the occasional bonfire/party but most of the time they just get a truckload of candy and challenge each other on pokemon w their nintendos lol

he also likes the feeling of his surroundings being numb and always ends up falling asleep after he finishes a blunt

which leaves a sleepy and clingy jaemin stuck w the rest of the dreamies

jaemin doesn’t let himself smoke around his flings as he doesn’t trust them nearly as much as his boys

lowkey has trust issues

but once he gets his daily dose of coffee, like 3000 shots of espresso he is A W A K E

the dreamies are the worst for almost getting in trouble

when it gets dark they usually hop on their bikes, grab two bottles of spray paint each, and go on into their neighbourhood, whilst playing obnixous dubstep from their speakers

and cause total chaos 

they always leave dogs barking and house lights turning on in their wake as they cycle like mad men down the empty streets, streaking the road with luminous pinks and greens

they get the biggest thrill out of being chased by the local police

whenever the hear the telltale siren they all whoop and laugh in unison, shouting out bets on who will get caught first chenle and who’ll get back to the hangout first renjun

it’s dangerous but they get a real kick out of it and always make sure to tweet about and post it on ig

overall jaemin is jus your average bad boy who likes causing havoc

but who doesn’t like havoc?? 

you, my dear reader :))

you had just moved house and into a completely new neighborhood

 it was your fifth day in your new home and you missed your old area a lottt

and you were highkey bitter bc you didn’t want to move but your parents made you >:((

so sunday night rolls around and you were chilling in bed, watching some dumb yt video when all of sudden in the distance you heard,,,thumping,,,

like really ugly but rhythmic thumping,,,

and it was getting louder and closer to your house

so you being all investigative, throw on your hoodie and waddle on downstairs and open your front door, the porch light turning on automatically

and what you saw was a sight

there were a group of boys cycling up and down your street, attempting to do tricks like wheelies???and shit

but as they did their tricks they were spraying the ground so they left a lot of squiggly lines as they turned and jumped

you didn’t mind that, you thought it was actually kind of pretty

but what wasn’t pretty was that hideous music

you were pretty sure they were playing that im blue dabdeeda song but a dubstepped remix version 

and god it was awful

but you kinda assumed they must have gona tone deaf bc they were screeching the lyrics to the tops of the voices and one tall kid was trying to freestyle to it

yeah, they were a sight

 you noticed none of the neighours had come outside which meant this was a normal occurrence??

oh no, you were not having this

without a second thought you shoved your feet into your uggs by the door and stomped your little butt over to the group of screaming boys

one of the boys who was on his phone on his bike, noticed you storming towards them and quickly hit another guy next to him and so on

until all their attention was on you

all six of them 

if it were your old neighbourhood you would have been flustered at their attention on you and they were good looking and you were wearing an,,,odd attire

but you didn’t care

once you reached them you just crossed your arms

“whose playing the music?”

they kinda looked at you as if you spoke another language

until you arched an eyebrow and the tall kid from earlier raised his hand, holding his phone 

“uh,,, i am,,, i’m jisung,,,”

you marched over to him and swiped his phone, ignoring the laughing from one of the boys, scrolling thru his horrible choice of songs

then one of them tapped you on ur shoulder

“so like,,who are you? whats your deal sis?”

you noted he had quite an ugly bowlcut that was also bright red and you just rolled your eyes, before typing in a decent song in jisungs phone

another kid stepped forward and tried to look menacing as he stood up slightly taller in front of you

“like haechan asked,,what’s your deal? do you know who we are?”

you scoffed and clicked on the song, feeling satisfied as frank oceans song ivy played through the speaker

“frankly i don’t care who you guys are but your taste in music is shit and you all sound obnoxious”

homeboy who tried to seem tough was lowkey shook

and haechan just laughed really sarcastically 

“our music taste is shit? your outfit is a mess” 

your outfit was literally a large hoodie and uggs but like??your mom bought them and u liked them!!

“my mess of an outfit is worth more than that tragic cheap dye job you got ontop of your scalp smh”

haechan just gaped at you while the boys tried to hide their snickers 

you were about to leave before another one of them stepped forward, stretching out his hand

“yo you’re kinda funny, i’m renjun!” 

u just stared at his hand 

“yeah cool i dont care, bye”

ohhhh cold

you had stalked off from them ignroing their oooo savages behind you, ready to slip back into bed highkey proud of yourself 

BUT

not so fast

suddenly your met with a really smiley face with pink hair

he grabs your hand and kisses the back of it giving you his usual, heart stopping smile

“i don’t think i’ve seen you before...i’m jaemin and its very nice to meet you (◕‿-)“

but you are not liking his large ass smile

you rip your hand back and just arch your eyebrow again at him

“are you all actually deaf? I am y/n, and I do not care! goodnight!” 

and off you storm, this time actually making it to your door

you spare one more glance at them as you’re closing it 

and the group are almost crying bc they’re laughing so hard at jaemin whose looking over at you 

and he just winks at as u slam the door shut 

damn reader, ur wildt

once you’re back in your room you hear the group disappearing down the street, smiling as you hear frank ocean’s voice float away slowly

you peak out your window to see if they’re all gone but what you see leaves your mouth gaping

there in a mix of luminous pink and greens, spelled out in capitals is

TILL NEXT TIME Y/N ♥

there was gona b a next time??? oh no poor you ;)

[pa-panda-heroes]

Is it alright to request Bakugo, Todoroki, & Kirishima finding out that their usually well put together s/o secretly smokes (only to cope with stressful stuff like a rough home life) but now that she’s with them she tries to quit but then a bad mission happens & they walk in as she’s shakily holding a cig? Happy ending pls. Sorry if it’s complicated recovery isn’t linear & ive been feeling bad just thinking abt going back to it.

Sweetheart, please don’t apologize! I understand, okay? No judgements whatsoever. I’m really sorry you’ve not been feeling well, but keep fighting, love. You can do it!! You got this!! I’m so proud of you for taking this giant step for your health <3 and so are the boys :> I put it under a cut because it’s long ^^

Katsuki, Shouto, and Eijirou with a s/o who’s trying to quit smoking (Scenarios)

Warning: slight mentions of relapse, smoking

Katsuki:

He knew. He knew you’d had a particularly bad day handling an awful situation - the kind of job any hero (maybe even Katsuki himself) would pass off onto a rookie so as to avoid having to deal with it. He knew you’d been trying your hardest to quit smoking. He knew you only picked it up as a way to cope. He knew it was hard. He knew it all. He was right there with you.

Yet it didn’t break his heart any less when he got home from his own hero shift to see you trembling and holding your head with both hands, an unlit cigarette nestled between your shaky fingers. A lighter lay on the coffee table in front of you, seemingly forgotten but not really. Your sniffling was loud, and it pained Katsuki to hear it, as if with each sniffle the hand around his heart squeezed tighter and tighter.

“Y/n.” He doesn’t say or do much else, and neither do you. It’s quiet, save for your sniffling and occasional hiccups. Katsuki sighs, not out of frustration, not out of pity, and certainly not out of anger. Well, maybe there was a hint of anger, but it was not aimed at you. It was aimed at whosoever pushed the put-together, organized you to this habit which was giving you a run for its money. Quietly, he moves to sit next your trembling form, wrapped in the plush blanket you got him for his birthday last year. It smelled like him. No smoke, no ashes. Him.

“Just take deep breaths,” he says quietly, afraid to spook you, as he slowly brings up his arm to wrap around your shoulders and bring you close. You’re rigid. Stiff. And so unlike yourself. “Don’t feel bad, y/n. Stuff like this... it’s hard. There’s no such thing as perfection when it comes to recovery. No one gets it right on the first try.” It’s hard, rewiring your brain not to crave a certain substance, or anything else, really. Katsuki hasn’t dealt with this firsthand, but as a hero he’s seen enough to know no one gets it right on the first try; sometimes people slip up.

“People slip up. And that’s fine,” he continued softly. “They just need to push themselves back up and fight back even harder. I’m so fucking proud of you, alright? And you - you’re tough as hell, you know that?” He stops, as if to gauge your reaction. And react you do. You bury your head in his chest, dropping your hands to your lap without a word. Saying something is too much right now. The cigarette is still between your fingers, but Katsuki gently takes it from you and tosses it onto the table.

“Maybe you don’t realize it, but you are.” Katsuki pats your shoulder furthest from him, leaning down to whisper at you. “You’d have to be, to put up with me and my bullshit,” he jokes with a pinch to your cheek, and finally you chuckle with a wee grin. “No, seriously! I always leave the toilet seat up, I scream at the TV, I never put my laundry right into the hamper, and I always forget to wash dishes... I’m kinda hard to live with.”

“You also kick in your sleep,” you quip with a giggle, voice tiny and meek yet full of love and spunk.

“Ah hell, do I? See, the list goes on and on.”

You shake your head wistfully, your grin growing by the second, but then it leaves you for something sweeter, something quieter. “Thank you for helping me quit, Katsuki.” The gentle lilt in your voice is music to his ears, though he wouldn’t outright admit it.

He huffs at you playfully. “Aw, shaddup. With everything you put up with from me, I’d say we’re even.” He almost seems bashful at your thanking him. Maybe he is.

“No, not quite. You also walk around naked at the worst possible times.”

“Oh. Yeah. Sorry.”

You turn to look up at him, eyes gleaming - and not from tears. “My friend really didn’t need to see you walking around in your All Might boxers.”

He shrugs it off. “She should’ve knocked. And you shouldn’t have bought them as a gag gift, babe.” Katsuki flicks your nose gently, leaving you to you wrinkle it and recoil from him.

“Jerk!”

Shouto:

Damn paperwork.

His back hurt, his eyes burned, and his wrist was currently cramping.

Yet it was better than everything you dealt with on patrol earlier. He wasn’t sure how you made it back in one piece like you did.

With a yawn he decided that’s it, a break is most certainly due. So he’d go looking for you, maybe even just five minutes together would make him a new man. But he couldn’t find you. Oh. Shouto wasn’t panicked by any means, but he was in a hurry to find you. He knew if even after one relapse, no matter how short-lived, you would beat yourself up about it better than you do villains. Even if there was no need to. Relapse happens sometimes.

Finally, he found you in the alleyway behind the agency. And he found the cigarette. It was lit, snug between your lips and slowly developing ash. Your hand was so shaky, Shouto was worried something was medically wrong for a second before he realized himself. He called out to you, a hand reached out as he approached. You jumped in your skin, head jerking his way, one lone tear trail on your cheek. “Y/n, please put that out.”

You wipe your nose with the back of your hand unceremoniously, but it didn’t bother him. “I’m sorry,” you breathe. “It’s just- it’s hard. I feel like I’m trying to put myself back together, but I’m missing a piece. Does that make sense?”

Shouto looks at you gently. “It doesn’t matter if it makes sense to me,” he says clearly. “As long as you understand it and talk about what you’re feeling, I’m happy. Why don’t you tell me more about what you’re feeling right now? It helped last time.”

“Overwhelmed. I’m overwhelmed as fuck.” You suck in a breath and bring your fingers to your lips to pick at them rather than take a drag.

“There’s nothing wrong with that. Being a hero is hard work.” He’s being supportive. He understands; he’s a hero, too.

“With everything at home when I started... and being a hero...” your voice breaks, “pushing one down for the sake of the other and trying to hold myself together and quit... it sucks, Shouto.”

Your love’s eyebrows pull upward with worry. “I’m sorry, love. You always do your best, you do so well.”

You glance at him with tears in your eyes before dropping the cigarette to the ground and stomping it out with a drawn out sigh. That... actually felt nice. It hurt, too, but it was nice.

“I know I’ve said this before, but I want you to talk to me when you’re craving, okay?” Shouto’s hands grab yours, thumbs rubbing the back of your hand soothingly and slowly. “It doesn’t matter where I am or what I’m doing. I want you to talk to me. I want to help.”

You nod quickly, unable to form words as tears well up and your lips fight against you to grimace. You wipe at your eyes with your free hand, sniffling all the while. You choke out a quiet “thank you,” and swallow thickly, only for Shouto to lean toward you and plant a kiss to your forehead before pulling you in for a warm hug in the cool alley.

“Dont thank me,” he whispers, squeezing you tight for emphasis. “It’s only natural I want to help you. I love you. All of you. No matter what.”

You nestle your cheek to his shoulder. “Even if I fuck up?”

“Are you kidding? Of course, y/n. I’ll always be so proud of you for fighting on.”

Eijirou:

“Hey, y/n-“

You blink at him, cigarette between your lips and lighter in your shaky hand. Your eyes are puffy and your cheeks are red. The flame of the lighter licked the cigarette but did not light it, and then suddenly died out as you pulled your thumb off the plate below the wheel. You reached up and closed the window of the bathroom before sitting back down on the side of the tub with your hands in your lap. “Please don’t be mad...”

The grin he wore just before he saw the cigarette faded. “Hey, I’m not mad.”

“I had a really bad day and... I dunno.” You looked down at your hands and the lighter and cigarette within them. “I just needed one. Just one. To deal with it.”

“But...” He hesitated, worried he’d come off too chiding. “Remember? ‘Just one’ turns into two, then three...”

You nod. “I know, I know, but...” Your sniffle hits his ears and it’s hard to hear.

“I’m not mad, or trying to be mean... I’m just worried.” Eijirou scratches the back of his head almost awkwardly. “Why don’t we go for a walk, yeah? Get some fresh air, too?”

You didn’t feel like it, but agree anyway. Eijirou doesn’t take you anywhere in particular, just walking and turning here and there when he felt like it, your hand in his all the while. You’re quiet the entire time, but he speaks enough for the both of you, talking about everything he sees or whatever a certain sight seems to remind him of. His hand squeezes yours every so often, as if to remind you that you don’t need to say anything, as long as you let him do this, let him distract you, let him help you - how ever you want to word it.

But suddenly he stops and turns to you, red eyes bright and gleaming. “Can I ask something selfish of you?” It’s sudden and unlike him to ask something like this.

You’re taken aback, but nod anyway.

“Any time you get the urge, any time you catch yourself reaching for a cigarette, will you promise me you’ll get out and take a walk?” Eijirou’s voice is quiet and soothing, yet you pick up concern. “Or just get up and walk around if you’d rather not go out. Please? Even if I’m not around...?”

You smile at him, his expression immediately relaxing upon seeing it. “Promise.”

“Good! I don’t know how well distraction would work, but maybe it’ll help.” He shrugs and continues walking again, pulling you with him. He had a point. Some fresh air did feel nice, and hearing the birds chirping as you walked by a small park was relaxing. That, mixed with the warm and kind hand of your lover, seemed to wash away the awful day you’d experienced. It was so soothing, you wondered why you hadn’t thought of this sooner.

With a sweet sigh, the tension in your shoulders dies downs an you relax, finally, for the first time in a while. This was Eijirou’s doing, certainly. This walk would only be half as pleasant without him, but you promised. Push comes to shove, you could go out for a coffee or snack break on your walk to keep yourself occupied.

“Hey, Eijirou.”

His hand squeezes yours before he turns to look at you. “Hm?”

“Thank you.”

He gives you a toothy, closed-eye grin. “O’ course, sweetheart!”

[transhoverfish]

I had this question in my mind for few days now but.. how many AUs have you made up for both Subnautica games?

I'm really curious because I started writing down all the ones that ever came on my mind (I have twelve now) - I wrote them into a Word document and some even have a description

I mean like the medieval, college.. any kind of au

hmmm actually i don't have that many? wait no nevermind. i just counted there's at least 8 counting survivors KABDKABFOHA

ANYWAYS here's a brief rundown of all my aus! once again long post so its under a read more. because by brief i mean at least a paragraph per au because im bad at being brief.

survivors

so this is the au im currently writing for! degasi lives, avery lives, various aurora crew live and they save the planet from the kharra a few times and raise some sea emp babies. big found family and some literal just family. some murder on the side too but that's not important found family only. probably the only one of this list that's ever to be properly written and finished.

melon and the coconut + dreamland

avery/bart centrenic au, partly based on an alteration of survivors where only they live. bart lives in his own fantasy of different outcomes to events, dreaming of something else. avery grows distant and bitter with bart's unwillingness to accept what's happened, and starts to blame him for everything. eventually the two drift apart so much that they barely interact, and avery leaves bart's base to build his own. bart never goes after him, and avery never purposely looks for him again. i got obsessed with glass animals + specifically these two songs so i daydreamed an au up. saddest out of all these i think :(

keen au

its keen sole survivor au babey!! according to 🌟realism🌟 most ppl don't live if they pass out for longer than like an hour (that does not include sitting in a small area w a fire and smoke for 3+ hours) so ryley uhhh Dies. keen doesn't go back to the aurora w/ yu and ends up being the only survivor. bc im a sucker for bart lives that might be a thing, perhaps not, it depends on my mood half way through.

ghost au

main plot of game with only on the crater, but everyone else is a ghost now and haunt ryley. ghosts can see ryley, ryley can see ghosts, ghosts cannot see each other, although they can occasionally hear each other if the people in question were close before they died. mostly just subnautica but ryley befriends dead people.

horror au

survivors but like….. mutations with WAY WORSE consequences and all the effects of the kharra that i forgot about. did you know the kharra causes aggression? because i did not. its mentioned in like 1 log and i totally forgot. living in complete isolation for 10 years and believing everyone you know is dead, and blaming yourself for the future deaths u know are coming? being able to hear a goddamn mile around you at all times while still having mostly the same normal human eardrums? being able to stop yours and others hearts AT ANY TIME WITH NO CONTROL OVER THIS AT ALL?

these powers fuck them up a lot more in this variation. also ocean scary. but mostly mutations and kharra and everything messes up everything for everyone.

paul fucking dies au

everything's the same up until the landslide at the first island base, where the degasi were inside when that giant boulder crashed into it. bart and marg escape but paul dies. whoops! never thought too hard about this one but marg probably makes all decisions, they explore further, maybe meet sea mama?? and stop the aurora + sunbeam from crashing?? hmmmm. but yeah just paul dies faster.

degasi in arctic au

the entire degasi ends up floating out to sector zero and marg is not alone! bart adopts preston. that is literally all i've thought about in this au, the base premise of it and bart adopts a dog.

evil bart au

bart….. but no longer Baby. bart is now Feral and Rabid. kind of a bad title bc hes not like, intentionally evil, but he makes some fucked up decisions and ppl die. basically the very original plot of survivors where bart gets obsessed with finding sea mama and curing the planet that Nothing Will Stop Him. destroys precursor stuff to stop the others from interacting w it and finding out anything, specifically lets micah and beatrix die bc they spoke out about him too much, probably lets danby die instead of helping him, probably partly responsible for paul's death similar to the very first degasi logs. havent thought about it in a long while so i dont remember much about it other than bart was evil. not rlly an au as opposed to a strange character choice for him that i ended up not liking, so prob the only one on here ill def never write out but hey figured id list it anyways

and i think that's all?? all of the ones i could remember or bothered to write down at least lol. got me a big list!!! :o

[theelliottsmiths]

Could you please liveblog The Making of Rosenrot and Mein Herz Brennt.

Okay I'm gonna do Rosenrot here and then make a separate one for MHB, scheduled so nobody gets a massive wall of text I uh. Assume you pop around to check if I've answered stuff occasionally and this isn't a two ships passing in the night deal. I might schedule this one for like midday tomorrow to increase specifically your chance of seeing it as it's 00:27 BST here currently.

I have probably already done one but here's the thing, it's my favourite making of and it's been a while.

Right at the beginning chess piece Richard lurking in the sunrise smoking. Very cute, still despise the hat. Nodding roughly in time? Fun, though I'm curious as to what he was actually nodding for. To look cool? It didn't work

Oli suits the lurking in a habit thing

Paul looks so so sleepy and it's kind of adorable.

I lose it a little every time he says 'shave off my sideburns I don't know if monks have sideburns' as if he doesn't have earrings. I think he just likes it, it seems like it was the fashion to shave the sideburns and a little extra in the DDR alt scene?

Hnnnn the little noises he makes when he's getting the hood put on my HEART

On the hill just before they're shooting it sounds like Zoran is backwards somehow

Like usual, only some of the boys are allowed to look good. Schneider and Till? Beautiful. Flake and Richard. Very silly. Oli and Paul are fine.

Flakes little beanie. Tills little grin. Richard looking deeply uncomfortable. Suspicious, even. Oli masterfully blending into the background

Schneider is somehow actually more suspicious even than Richard. He has a very suspicious face in general when he's Present.

Nobody can resist fuzzy Till when he says But I wanna make friends too :( Even melted Zorans heart

I want. To rub his soft and fuzzy little head. It's so spherical.

There's something about them seating Till and Paul so they look the same size that I just really enjoy

Richard: shouldnt we have knives??

Zoran: no, you're monks! He does.

Richard: we don't kill him? :/

Paul: we burn him...

Richard, in an intrigued and distinctly positive voice: we burn him?

Flake is smiling at him it's so sweet I love to be reminded that they all love each other

I like the way Richard says 'like the inquisition?'. No real reason, just sounds nice.

Is 'in prinzip'(?) A common phrase in general or is it a Zoran thing? He says it a lot.

I'm only five minutes in this is going to be so long mobile tumblr doesn't let me add an under the cut I'm so sorry

When he talks to other Germans Paul's accent is so detectable. I adore it, it's like the bubble writing teenaged girls use on posters.

The chainsaw. I always forget the chainsaw. Paul being Paul, it's the most fitting choice. Chaos gremlin.

SCHNEIDER AND THE PUPPY

Richard looming over the children in the seesaw like the grim reaper waiting for one to fall off and crack their head on something hard

Olis sleeve wine is genuinely the funniest thing any of them have ever done. He has a penchant for doing robot movements and it's gotten to a point where I wonder if he's an android. A factory runaway because he was slightly faulty and about to be switched off. He ended up staying with Richard and Schneider because Richard understood and schneider didn't notice.

'dont bother asking me any questions, enough questions have already been asked' he says in his little beanie. Owns my heart. If the film thing is remotely true I want to know what Richard thinks, being so into films himself. He's smirking a tiny bit

God, he looks uncomfortable about the kiss.

Hey so anyway what is that guy doing behind him? Cleaning? Because he's using a paintbrush to do it and now I'm questioning whether most of the whipping was real...

I mean, later on you can physically see a welt forming in Paul's shoulder and they're all clearly in a bit of pain but that doesn't mean it's all real... Unless he's, like, painting on some ointment?

I adore this whole chunk of till practicing the murder scene, he's so... Disarming. Like hi yes I'm large and have a knife but you see, I'm actually small and silly look at my fuzzy head I'm v v approachable see my goofy pointy tooth smile? And my high voice and nice accent

Why is Zoran dressed as a monk too

You go here, and i—oop—make like this and then I get the knife and *stab sound*. I hit two, three times

Have you ever really payed attention to the way he makes his T sounds? It makes sense that it's different to the standard because teeth but this

Schneider looks so much like a plague doctor... Kinda into that.

I don't like that Zoran doesn't use Cătălinas name

Richards hair refuses to lie flat. The smoke floating up and then clicking into a straight line always catches my attention

Flake avoiding eye contact is, as the kids say, a major mood. Did he not understand Zoran or was he ignoring him til Oli got his attention? Was he already going deaf in one ear by that point? He looks like, and I mean this in the most loving way, a Muppet when he's looking directly at her. I think it was purposeful

Till giggling when Zoran tickles him with the rose. I do not understand why he says their relationship is ambiguous when they're... in bed together.

Hhhhhh god till looks so good in the flagellation lesson though. Soft sweet chumby boy. I like how visible his scar is.

Paul is always so into the violence and chaos isn't he? I like that he's singing the song but specifically it's the guitars, not the melody. And then theres Flake, the amateur masochist. The sudden camera eye contact always gets me.

A thing I really love about the whole self flagellation thing is that Paul is right there with till the entire time. He hurts himself almost as much as till does, he's there assisting when till is experimenting (sidenote...he does look good though huh), he's across the way where they can see each other in the circle (Richard is directly across which, I don't know, I feel like it's intentional). It seems like he's supporting him. Also that he's just a chaos gremlin and likes to be where the action is.

I've gone into so much detail about their whipping styles in the past

Schneider must be really relieved they didn't really use any of the clips during the whipping where he looks like a sock. He does not look mean he looks like a sock puppet with no hand I'm sorry but it's true

I do like the way Schneider and Paul talk about it though. They got a lot from the experience, it seems. I'd like to hear their thoughts on it now.

'Till, don't defend yourself!' ...the wriggling is cute

Flake and Richard having a little smile :) but Oli and Schneider, deadly serious.

Richard and Till... Should wrestle. Between this and Haifisch it's clear it'd be beneficial. Mein Teil does not count, it should be one on one.

I wish I knew what Till says as he gets up, I'm assuming hes joking about Richard beating him up?

Richard and paul are so careful beating him up. Paul especially is very careful to just softly jostle him. Also, the softest ear pinch

Oli: grinning, happy with their work

Paul: looking serious, not enjoying it at all

Richard: 😬, not remotely a fan, experiencing physical pain just seeing it

Oli heads off Paul's complaints perfectly, it's so practiced. He must have to do it regularly, Paul complains just for the fun of it.

-17° and he has Till topless on his back. Unnecessary. Its so cold the screen doesn't work.

I like to think they tried to drag him not-on his back

I just... I really Like Rosenrot and the making of.

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

Life After Snowpiercer: Still Alive

Summery- Curtis (hints of You) makes his way through the cars, and reaches the end to find a surprise waiting for him. Violence. 

If you want to read the story Curtis told Nam, read it here- Past Horrors

Word Count- 2967

Chapter 3 / Masterlist

“OPEN IT, OPEN THE FUCKING GATE!”

Curtis stood at the final gate, the final mother fucking gate, his palms slapping at it, his boots ramming into it, and his rage, all that rage from the past 17 years, and more recently the two days it took him to fight his way here, so many lives, gone. His revolution had become a blood bath, Gilliam executed, Grey stabbed, Tonya shot, You… well he couldnt even let himself go there, not yet. Edgar, well fuck Edgar he betrayed, having left him laying among the rest, setting out right after the battle of the tunnel, leaving the majority of people behind to care for the dead and wounded. There was no time to stall.  

Hours before in horror he watched the front enders slaughter his people in the television screen,among a car full of children singing praises to the almighty Wilford, the saviour. The armed men entered the gate and were lost from sight. Curtis just felt that all of you were gunned down without a care. No…. He almost broke right then and there, he could see them entering the last car, the one where he supposedly had you kept safe. His breathing picked up, his chest tightened and black stars swarmed in his vision. Then the tv crackled the noises of gunshots and flares of white could be seen coming out of the darkest gateway, all of it so grainy on the screen, but it was picture clear for him. No bodies could be seen, but the way his whole being just shattered into a million biting glass edges, slicing unseen wounds through his mind, he lost you, he couldnt keep you safe after all. Tonya smacked his face. “Curtis snap out of it, you have to lead us”

How can I? Shes gone, they shot her. His mind pieced together an image of your body crumbled in the middle of the aisle, bright red blossoming around you like a opening flower across your back, your hand outreaching for the darkness that might have hid you. Your eyes, the ones hes seen laughing, crying and loving, glassed over sightless, that part that was a persons soul, the spark that brought them life in there eyes, gone. Gone, could it really be? Curtis, she was doomed the day she chose you, and you kept her anyways. Monster. You killed her.

Suddenly Tonya came into his vision again, and beyond her, Minister Mason crumbled on her knees, her rat like face, with those beady eyes and oversized false teeth saying his name “Curtis, I can help you!” The heavy weight of the gun in his palm had a purpose, and it felt FUCKING GOOD just then. Without even a moment in between her words and him registering what the fuck she was pleading for, he marched over and right to her forehead the muzzle settled, her eyes rolling up to look at it in fear, the yellowish whites of her eyes brimming with tears, pupils focused on the muzzle indenting against her forehead. “Curtis pleeease, I beg you!”

His expression, was that of a man who no longer gave a shit what happened to him, his finger squeezed and that bullet, with a little satisfaction for him, drilled through her brain, a splatter of red grazing the entire area. A wipe of his hand across his face, he turned back towards the gate, Nam already working on it. Switching to a new cartridge, he told those still remaining. “We go forward” And just as he came to the gate, Nam got it to swing open, and now this man became the darkest part of himself he could possibly be, the compassion he would show his fellow kind was simply gone. There was no hestitation in his actions. If anyone crossed his path, they were met with cold killing rage.

Now at the final gate, that god damn signature W holding him back from Wilford. Nam tried to stall Curtis, refusing to open that final one for reasons Curtis couldnt understand. His daughter Yona, moaned on a pile of coats, drugged and drunk beyond rational thought, the child was a pitiful sight indeed. “Open the gate Nam, now. Is this what you want?” Curtis emptied his pockets of the kronoles, flinging them at the ex security intel “Take it! Open the fucking gate now!” 

In a moment of weariness, Curtis stumbled to the floor, leaning back against the frame work staring at the door. Nam took some pity on the man and tossed him a smoke “Fucker better enjoy it, its the last one.” What the hell, Curtis thought, and he lit it, taking a stale drag of nicotine he hadnt experienced since he was 16 at a party. Finally he started talking, telling Nam all about how the beginning of his life on the train went. Inside his mind though, was a totally different conversation, his way of saying goodbye he supposed although numb at this point to everything, he could still sense the pain it was causing, vibrating in waves from him. 

“Hey handsome” Your hands would slide up his chest and circle around his neck. “Almost at the end of the line”

“Appears so Baby” Another drag of smoke escaping from him. 

“I guess were lucky we got this far right? I knew you would Curtis” Plucking his smoke from his lips and taking an inhale, washing the two of you in a billowing nicotine haze. 

“Leave it to you babygirl to find the bright side here.” He chuckled, seeing you now rise to the balls of your feet to kiss him, hell even imaginary your kisses could score a fire to settle in him. How he wished it was real. That you were here, fuck he missed you it was an ache in his chest.”I dont think Im going to be returning… “ His voice drifted off softly. 

“Oh handsome, you know I will find you again, another lifetime. You dont think this is truly the end of us?” 

“No? it seems like it” 

“Handsome, this is just one of many. I love you and we will see each other again. Now go do what you came to do.” you winked and returned the camel between his lips. Stepping away and leaving him alone once more.

Curtis lifted his gaze, asking one last final time. “Open the gate, please” Nam again shook his head, going off in how they MIGHT survive outside of the train, that the snow was melting, there was no need to stay. 

“What are you fucking nuts? go out there and freeze. Leave all these people here, no. Open the GOD DAMN MOTHER FUCKING DOOR” 

Then like the gate just knew, it clicked open and a flash of yellow stepped out, Nam shot backwards and in Claudes hand was a pistol. Composed as ever, she looked at Curtis. “Wilford will see you now.” 

He simply spared a glance at Nam, whom Yona was wailing and shaking to bring back to her, and he pushed up, and into the room, all cold steel metal and blue glows, along one wall was a kitchen gallery, all dark masculine looking wood work and at the table in the car, sat an older man with intense blue eyes, staring at Curtis while frying his steak, smirking. “Curtis! Lets take a look at you.” Wilford almost sounded joyful, impressed? “You did a mans work coming all the way up here, did you know its been years since anyones walked the entire length of this train. How about you sit down, lets chat.” Claude nudged him towards the seat. With contempt he obliged, sitting down. “Would you believe Ive never been to the tail section?”

Curtis spat out “why the hell not, we to dirty for you in the tail section?”

“You think the engine isnt without its own complications Curtis?” Wilford turned from frying his steak for half a second, fixing Curtis with a look of disappointment. “It gets awful noisy up here, and not many to talk to.” 

Who the fuck does he think he is? Noisy? Trying living with a thousand people in a iron box. “Right, you got steaks, room, and that whore will bring you whatever you want.”

“Curtis, everyone has there preordained position. And everyone is in there place…” Pointing at him with the greasy spatula, the steak starting to smoke and sizzle on the stove top. “Except you.” Turning back he flipped the steaks on a plate. 

“Yea, thats what people with the best place say to those in the worst place. There is not one soul who wouldnt willingly trade places with you.” Damn straight Baby, your voice encouraged him. 

“Would you?” Wilford questioned, seasoning his steak, how in the hell do seasons still exist? Perhaps you werent always the best voice of reasoning. 

“Fuck you” Curtis spat at him with hatred and disgust. 

Wilford sighed, as if exasperated with him. “Curtis, were all stuck on this train, and its a enclosed ecosystem with a fragile balance. Med rare?” Breaking his line of thought, Curtis ignored the question entirely, which Wilford paid no heed to. “population must be kept in balance, everything rigidly maintained. Now there are times… we have to take more drastic measures.” Wilford brought the steaks over, setting one perfectly cooked one in front of Curtis. “we simply dont have time to let natural selection take over, we all would be overcrowded on this train, starving. Remember starving Curtis? It took us a while to get the protein blocks going. I am truly sorry about that.” Wilford cut a bite of his steak and chewed between the rest of his words. “So we occasionally stir the pot to speak. Get things moving… The cast out of the seven, The McGregor Riots, and this one… My new favorite. The Great Curtis Revolution. Nice ring to it, right? The kids will love it” He winked one icy blue eye at Curtis as if it was a big joke between them. “I mean who was to expect you to come through with torches through the  Yekaterina tunnel? Pure genius, nothing like Gilliam or I expected” 

Curtis snapped his head a bit and confusion clouded his face He didnt just say that. “What?”

“Now come on, dont tell me you didnt know, Gilliam and I?” Giving an amused chuckle at Curtis confusion. “Front end and Tail end, we work together Curtis, he was more then a partner, he was my friend.”

“Bullshit, I dont believe you” Curtis stated, there was no way Gilliam was friends with Wilford, the hours the two of them had spent together discussing how to get here. 

A grin crossed Wilfords face “well our plan was that the rebellion was to end at the tunnel. Kill off most of you, send the rest back. Curtis, why do you think Gilliam conditioned you to be the leader after McGregor? Sadly, it was supposed to be your hurrah. Your going out like in that old movie…. Braveheart? Going out in a fight. Your name was to give the remaining tail enders hope. So Gilliam gave you everything you could want back there. No one messed with you, got to keep the pretty girl, no one shamed you for keeping both your hands. Wasnt it nice, be able to hold her with both.” Dont you dare listen to him baby, we chose each other, Your voice echoed and stressed.  A sickness washed over Curtis as these words, Wilford seemed none the wiser over what his words were doing, or he simply didnt care. “Gilliam said you were smart, but he could control you. Sadly he didnt.” Wilford wiped his mouth and tossed the napkin down, not even eating half the steak. “And why he had to pay the price. Im going to miss my friend, our long nightly chats.”

Still in disbelief over the news, Gilliam had been a mentor to him, a father when he needed advice. All those years, and he just fueled Curtis rage for this moment. No one knew that the traitorous snake was the man they all pledged there allegiance to. 

“But your little stunt, well it took out more of the front end then I had hoped, but what fun, right? Its okay, you tail enders throw off brats pretty quickly, we will recover. Theres really just one last thing to do.” Picking up a phone, he pressed a button and waited for an answer. “How many you got left back there?” He listened and looked at Claude “We still at 75 percent?” she gave a nod and he returned to whomever was on the phone “Kill off 75 percent…. actually you know what? In celebration of our 18th year, keep 18 extra alive. Thank you” 

Before he hung up, the barely there sound of gunfire blasted from the phone, and Curtis sprang to his feet. “YOU SON OF A BITCH!” Claude gave off one warning shot, which ricochet the bullet around the room, causing them all to duck momentarily. “God damn it Claude! Mind the engine.” Turning to Curtis who was straightening himself out and at this point ready to get this fucken over with. “God damn high strung woman, cant do nothing with them when they get to that point.” Wilford muttered to himself, going up the steps to check on the cylinders circling. Curtis followed him up, preparing to end this now. Wilford pulling out his own pistol from his robes, he cocked it at Curtis.”Mind your next move son. I got a proposition for ya, you might want to consider.” 

Curtis merely paused cause of the gun pointing at his chest, basic human instinct still riding out his anger. Clenching his jaw, the twitch ticking in tandem, Wilford motioned him forward. “Listen, I like you, you got spunk, You get the job done. I already have a predecessor, but I need someone who can take over Minister Masons place since you disposed of her. About time someone did, I couldnt stand that woman. At the time, she was my finest choice though. You carry out what I need done, I know you have it in you.” Sliding the gun back into his robe when it seemed Curtis was no longer about to attack him. “Once in a while you dispose of some unnecessary lives we no longer have use for, do some intimidation to out of control groups. I will let you stay up front, even bring your girl up here.”

“Shes still alive?” Curtis croaked, the haze of your name clouding his senses, could it be true, was there actually hope?

“What? Of course shes still alive Curtis. First shes a woman, I wouldnt have my men kill off any women her age unless she was unfit to bear children. Even if you werent in the picture I would have her brought up here, resupply the front end. Shes a pretty thing, make someone a good wife. We need to continue the supply after all. Second, shes yours and Gilliam made it clear she was necessary to keep you compliant. Why do you think we allowed you two to play house with those orphans? Her little pet project. Why we never collected those kids, yes I knew all about them all along.” Wilford spoke as if he was doing You and Curtis a major favor. The fucken ass. Curtis could just see you now, the roll of your eyes and arms folding over your chest, Child Bearing Wife? Go Fuck Yourself Wilford.

All this information sunk in, Still alive, You were still alive. He could have you back, it was as simple as saying yes at this point. Sinking to his knees, his hands came to his face, relief watering his eyes and a soft sob broke. Wilford circled the man, whispering to him “Imagine it Curtis, life of luxury up here, have your girl back. You wouldnt ever have to live in a cage per say again. Just follow my orders like a good little soldier. Its really that easy. Minister Everett, sounds fitting right? The tail ender who actually made something of himself. Gilliam would want that for you.” Then he walked away, leaving Curtis all alone, choking on another sob, his hand came to his head and brushed his signature beanie off, rubbing his head.  No Curtis, you are here for a reason, echoes of your voice shouted at him.  “And if I say no?” Wilford snorted with disdain at Curtis, rolling his eyes with exasperation. 

“Im giving you the deal of a life time and you dont want to take it? Fine, I guess I will have her killed Curtis, marched right up here and you can watch her die, or bring her up here and give her away to someone else? You can watch another man have her. Is that a better option. Its either you do this or you die and shes mine.” He gave a shrug. “The choice of your fates is in your hands.” Wilford was no fool, he knew how to work Curtis, already he could see the mans shoulders sink in a sign of defeat. Claude was perched near the gate entrance when it opened, a glance over her shoulder widened her smile, and she stepped aside. “Ahhh, I was wondering where my predecessor had gone off to, its about time you arrived. I was just telling Curtis all about what we set up for him.”

Curtis looked over his shoulder and the familiarity of the man struck him hard, it was like looking at you, your features in this young man was so prominent, he croaked out in disbelief. 

“Matt?!” 

Yes, your brother was still alive, healthy and alive. Dressed in a fine suit, well groomed, the young man smirked at Curtis. “Long time Curtis, good to see you again.”

@what-is-your-plan-today​ @jtargaryen18​ @curtisbbq​ @p8tn0lish​

[marshmallowprotection]

Yes more custom mcs I'm off my artist block and now theres no stopping me from doing this

mJust a warning, this custom mc is…uh, triggery to say the least.

Triggers: Abuse, suicide, abusive relationships, depression, overall things like that (+Rika being manipulative) 

I can understand if you dont want to look at this, its not that heavy in terms of descriptiveness, its just mentions and stuff, excluding when its described of this mc being locked in a small dark closet without food for hours…and when her brother murders her father after he murders her other five sisters…;-;

This is also a match up request (im sorry, i know, this is like the third i have sent, i just like hearing other peoples ideas and stuff and whilst im thinking this  mc might be able to go with saeran…i dunno, saeran needs a rock and she needs a rock, idk if they can be rocks for each other, idk just with their trauma they might end up just hurting each other, plus uh suit saeran times…eek. that would just trigger her REALLY  badly considering its so similar to the “locked in closet without food in the dark” thing. since. during suit times. if following ray’s route. she would be locked in her room without food for two-ish(?) days…;-;)

Also yes unfinished sketch of her ^ kind of went with a lolita/victorian style for her, since Mint Eye gives lolita/victorian style fantasy vibes (Magenta is LITERALLY a castle, like, come on Rika, did you have to make it so obvious?). 

Full Name: Sayaka Yamato

International Age: 21 (AS) 22 (OS)

Korean Age: 22 (AS) 23 (OS)

Nicknames: Madi (Yoosung, Zen, Jaehee)

Koko (By Seven)

Blood Type: AB+

Sexual Orientation: Heterosexual

Marital Status: Single [Shipped With ???]; Has a Unrequited(?) Crush On Ray; Has Had A Previous Relationship

Ethnicity: Japanese

Nationality: South Korea

Religion: Shinto

Birthdate: May 6th, 1994

Zodiac: Taurus

Height: 5′0 ft (152 cm)

Weight: 95 lbs (43 kgs)

Status: Alive (All Routes Except V’s)

Deceased (V’s Route)

Occupation: Affiliated With Mint Eye 

Hobbies: Playing The Violin, Gardening With Ray Occasionally, Singing, Dancing

Likes: Flowers, Music, Dancing, Being Praised By The Savior, Ray, Baking, The Ocean, Flower Crowns, The Sun, Long Hot Showers

Dislikes: The Dark (Severe Phobia), Being Called “Darling” (Trauma Related), Ice Skating, Small Rooms (E.g. the size of a small closet; Trauma Related), Crowds, Smoking, Alcohol, The Unknown, Being Alone With Her Intrusive Thoughts

Affiliations: Mint Eye

Relatives: Father (Deceased)

Mother (Deceased)

5 Older Half-Sisters (Deceased)

Older Half-Brother

Background: Sayaka is a girl from Japan who moved to South Korea with her older brother when she was 14. Sayaka was born the youngest of 7 siblings, 6 girls (including herself) and one boy, who was the eldest. Her and her siblings were all born into a abusive household, their mother being a woman who slept around, making all of her children half siblings, and the one man who was there, the father (Sayaka does not think of him as her father) of the eldest child, sexually abused his daughters, whilst the mother sexually abused the only son. Sayaka’s childhood home reeked of alcohol and smoke, and whenever she misbehaved even a little, she was locked inside one of the smallest closets of the house for hours on end, without food. When she was 14 her “father” seemed to have snapped (he was already mentally fucked up, its not like he suddenly became this way), murdering her 5 sisters in front of her eyes, and then her mother, and before he could kill her, her brother (who was apprehended him, took his knife, and killed him. Her older brother then took her and ran as far away as he could, eventually managing to move her and him to South Korea where they started a new life. When Sayaka was 19, she met a man (who was 5 years her senior) who she fell in love with and moved in with him. However, once again, Sayaka was abused, mostly sexually, however. Due to her boyfriend always calling her “Darling” and due to the abuse she underwent, her main PTSD trigger is whenever she hears the word “Darling” or is called such. One day, Sayaka meets Rika by chance in a park when on a walk with her boyfriend, and Rika eventually manages to separate the two. What follows is Rika forcibly making Sayaka break up with her boyfriend, and Rika making Sayakaa trust her by telling her about her own experience with sexual abuse. Sayaka eventually becomes part of Mint Eye, becoming one of Rika’s “favorites” as she likes to say in a sort of bragging tone. Many could mistaken Sayaka being in love with Rika because of how much she seems to fawn over her, when in reality Sayaka love lies with Ray. Sayaka and Ray met in the gardens of Mint Eye whilst Sayaka was watering a Lily of The Valley, and ended up slowly becoming friends because of their shared love of flowers and gardening. Sayaka ended up developing a crush on Ray since he was her first friend and the first man (besides her half-brother, who she honestly never was very close to due to him working all the time to support him and her) to not hurt her in some way. 

In V’s route, when Rika chooses to destroy Magenta, Sayaka decides to stay in Magenta. This was in search of suicide, and also to stay with Ray. She dies in the explosion whilst shielding Ray from most of the blast. 

I match you with... 

Zen!

You’re the kind of person that’s desperate to find a sense of peace in your life and you’ve never known what it feels like to live in peace. You’re haunted by the past and what those demons mean to you. It’s hard to cope but you’ve kept on living because that seems like the right thing to do... you’re lost, for the lack of a better word. 

Nobody’s ever put you first or given you the chance to see that you are worth loving and you have a life with meaning. If my brain didn’t scream, Zen, I’d be inclined to agree with you on the Ray front. It’s simply because you seem like you need someone that will hold your hand and remind you that you’re beautiful and that you never deserved to go through what you did. He would be very soft and sincere with you, not pushing you once he realized that you were the type to feel skittish and unsure of yourself around others. He just wants to see you smile and laugh, so expect him to extend his hand to you when you aren’t sure what it is you want. 

I think he’d love your style and your way of presenting yourself to the world. He can appreciates someone who seems to thrive in their style and what makes them happy. He’s always complimenting you and reminding you that he thinks the world of you at the end of the day.

[mccarricks]

( brittany o’grady / demi woman ) WESLEY McCARRICK is 23 years old and is a SENIOR at thales university. SHE is majoring in FILM and is known for being THE MAVERICK as THEY can be HUMOROUS and OPEN-MINDED as well as DITZY and IMPULSIVE. every time i see HER/THEM, THEY remind me of PURPLE SKY IN THE DESERT, SKATING AS FAST AS YOU CAN TO FEEL THE WIND ON YOU, A JOKE TOLD WITH A TOOTHY GRIN.

hero’s back w character no. 2 and yet......

full name: wesley ‘wes’ elaine mccarrick

birthdate: february 2, 1997

age: 23

gender: demi woman

pronouns: she/her/they/them

zodiac: aquarius

nationality: american

ethnicity: black (louisiana creole) and white (irish)

hometown: santa fe, nm

languages: english, intermediate spanish

family:

theodore mccarrick, father

elaine barlow, mother

ruby mccarrick, older brother

delphine mccarrick, older sister

sherri barlow, maternal grandmother

many cousins

orientation: bisexual biromantic, pref. towards women/nb people but will date men

religion: agnostic

height: 5 ft 4 in

distinguishing features: eyebrows, hair, lips

character inspo: ilana wexler (broad city), harley quinn (dc comics), phoebe buffay (friends), prob more

𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊𝐆𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃

TRIGGERS: divorce, mentions of crime, drug and alcohol use

the youngest child of ted and elaine mccarrick, wes was a kid who is full of life. she’s the kind of kid who did things to make you smile, and it usually worked. she was warm and inviting, a little naive, but she had a strong support system.

her parents divorce when she’s six, she doesn’t quite understand it but her dad moves out, and her grandma and multiple cousins move in. it’s a lively household, between her mom, who works as a nurse, and her siblings, and her cousins, it was never really quiet and there was never a lot of room.

despite the split, her parents maintain that their children have a relationship with both of them, and truthfully, wes is a daddy’s girl. she and her dad were cut from the same cloth, happy go lucky, fun loving, a bit silly, he’s the one who introduces her to movies. it’s their thing, watching and critiquing them together, and it’s not whatever is in theatres either. they went for all times of filmmaking, new wave, surrealist, and more.

it really stuck with wes, who herself had begun making movies, mostly horror/fantasy/scifi stuff with her friends-- she writes and directs and occasionally, she’ll don a costume and star in them. they’re silly little things, but her family always sat down for her “premieres.”

her formative years are marked with plenty of things, sports, deaths of distant family members, a cousin or two who gets caught in the wrong crowd and ends up in jail, and throughout this, wes remains a rock for her family.

she’s in high school, and she gets into the eclectic crowd, the outcasts, the weirdos, the ones who smoked under the bridge, and partied out in an abandoned trailer near the desert. these freaks were her freaks. they accepted her with open arms, as she them.  

she chooses thales because she always wants to see the east coast, and frankly, as much as she loves her family, she wants to be free of them. and they have a fantastic film program. so!

she meets steven in their first film class together, and they’re fast friends, despite her usual weariness of YET another film bro, steven proves to be a good egg. so she thinks. she finds out through him talking that he might not be the most faithful to his girlfriend, and as much as she doesn’t like meddling, she thinks it’s only right to let clarissa, who she doesn’t really know well, know. however, before there’s a chance, everything happens-- now she’s stuck wondering if she should reveal the truth, or let sleeping dogs lie.

nana is different, nana and her dated her sophomore year, nana’s freshman year. it wasn’t serious. but they were fond of each other. they eventually break up, but they stay friendly, waving to each other in the halls, chatting at parties.

both the disappearance and the murder is weird for wes, who by all accounts, isn’t great at dealing with bad shit. she prefers to laugh about things. laugh about everything. because if she doesn’t laugh, she’ll cry.

𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘

wes is a mess, a free-spirit, a walking contradiction. she’s very independent minded, the kind of person who does things without thinking so much about the consequences, this leads her into trouble sometimes. like nicking something from a convenience store, or stealing a stop sign as a prank. she’s definitely the kind to goof off and not exactly dedicate her full attention to something. and while she’s in genuinely good spirits on most occasions, she has a staunch ‘no asshole’ policy. the type to defend the underdogs, and go after bullies. she’ll punch you with a smile on her face, and yet it ends up being more unnerving than you realize. she’s a bit of a ditz, as well, never the best at school, but can talk your ear off about the going ons of the world. she’s a lovable dumbass, for sure, and loyal to a tee once you get her as a friend.

𝐓𝐈𝐃𝐁��𝐓𝐒

horror movie fan! her favorites are some of the oldies, like dracula and  the bride of frankenstein! and some new ones! big fan of jordan peele’s work, as well as ari aster’s! but mostly really advocates for women directors and directors of color!

also does roller derby! she picked this up her first year at thales and fell in love with it, i can’t think of a name for her yet, but she’s a blocker, won’t hesitate to elbow some dick at the bar

kinda a tomboy? she’s always been! she’s rough and tumble and not afraid to get down and dirty with someone, i.e. will join those football games on the quad or crawl through the mud for a scene to shoot

doesn’t know if she wants to be a director/writer or a cinematographer honestly.... she loves the technical aspects of film as much as the making the stories

definition of a bruh girl, says it a whole lot, but also just if you tell her you love her, she’ll just roll her eyes and be like you’re an idiot (which means she loves you too) she’ll be affectionate if she’s close to you

kinda a wh*re oops....... texts multiple girls at a time and doesn’t want to hurt any of their feelings she doesn’t know how she keeps ending up in these situations... also a bisexual disaster

a stoner as well..... always has a massive jar of weed

unclear whether she lives on campus or off campus but if she does live off campus she has a pet turtle named elsa lanchester after the bride of frankenstein actress

a drummer! she’s in a band (name tbd) she started drumming at a young age and found it was a good way to manage her aggression

doesn’t really do well with emotions, so she’ll either be like there, there, or try to make jokes.... she really said kids can you lighten up

walking meme... such a walking meme... doesn’t know so many things she’s like a cute puppy with no thoughts head empty but she’s so fun to be around

life of the party.... nana she came fr ur spot and she took it and she’s not sorry but she does miss u a lot

doesn’t rly feel like she’s allowed to be upset anyways bc some people have it...... way worse.... can u say Imposter syndrome

kind of an enabler...... will be that person to push u to try things but not in a peer pressurey way, more like if u are unsure abt sending a text she says do it

wears fun earrings and socks! think lollipops or gummy bears or found objects like she collects that shit it’s her lifeline

boxes! she’s been boxing since she was abt 12, courtesy of her older brother (who is now a doctor thx ruby) and it’s a good way to exercise and release stress

𝐖𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍𝐒

best friend -- two of a feather, cut from the same cloth, or complete opposites it doesnt matter to her (the abbi to her ilana)

roller derby friends -- she’s p close to the team, margs on her

makeup artist pal -- i think it would be neat fr someone to try and teach her makeup whether its normal or sfx bc she wants to look like a monster or smthn

she’s gullible, u take advantage of that -- u just tell her lies p much and she’s like yeah ok that sounds right

party friends

classmates

fwbs (f/m/nb) -- tbh she might have one or two of these but they literally are the def of pals who bone sometimes... like v good abt being like you good? u dont want more? cool me too

exes (f/m/nb) -- mostly dated women or nb people but def cld have had a guy

she smokes you out -- p much the only reason u hang out w her is bc she has good weed

someone she’s fought -- like fully decked in the face, prob said something that rubbed her the wrong way and it just devolved from there

people who dislike her -- she could definitely be seen as annoying bc shes loud and dorky and funny so ??

breaks someone out of their shell -- p self explanatory, pushes them to have fun, w everything happening shes rly like lifes too short to not take the opportunities around u

cousins! probably on her dad’s side! i figure she has some east coast fam 

anything? truly?

[felicityfiction]

[bulletproof glass part 4] part 3

a/n: its 5am. i needed a study break. this is terrible. im very disappointed in myself but also not sure if i can put anything out thats better. i have failed, please dont hate me :(

god, do they even teach them how to shoot?

san smirks, easily dodging a badly aimed bullet from a poorly hidden sniper. not really a sniper at all, if you ask him. just someone too cowardly to come down and face the action on the ground.

weakness.

in the chaos of a building carpark, there are guns blazing and shouts echoing, the occasional yell of pain or shattering of glass as these terribly trained excuses of henchmen hit a car instead of their intended human target.

it’s music to san’s ears.

to his left, he registers seonghwa, barrelling towards him with a wholehearted intention to get him into a car and to safety, but san is just starting to have fun.

he takes down two guys who have at least a foot on him, but he barely breaks a sweat. adrenaline is pumping through his veins, and he thinks that maybe he doesn’t have to smoke tonight to be able to get high.

this is his drug. san is addicted to the danger of it all. it’s messy and wonderful, a dance that is ingrained into san’s brain and burned into his muscle from years of first hand experience. choi san is talented, and he’s about to show it.

he sees seonghwa veer sharply to his right, and he spares a glance in his direction. just in time to see seonghwa gun down two guys who were surrounding hongjoong, trying to take him down. the leader was to be captured alive, no doubt, to be used as leverage. if his father was here, these guys would be all over him like hyenas to a carcass. but he isn’t, content to let san and seonghwa handle tonight’s minor matters.

he’s mine.

the words thrum in his ears, fuelling his slightly fatigued muscles to keep going until all their enemies were down. he was the next in line to inherit the choi name, and he sure as hell was going to make his name known to everyone in the underground.

and perhaps the child in him still preens under his father’s praise, and he’s greedy for more.

but san is amused by the sight of seonghwa fumbling in his attempt to get to hongjoong, his usual grace lost in his worry. he almost reaches out to hongjoong, then freezes and recoils like hongjoong at shot him. san feels a stab of pity, but also a brief inkling of scorn

this is what affection does to you.

hongjoong had come with few guards, despite knowing that there was a high chance that this deal would go south. perhaps he trusted san more than he let on, or he thought that san had a bigger target on his back, and he would be able to escape unscathed if it came down to it

or, san thinks, maybe he knows someone here will die to protect him.

a hand comes flying out of nowhere, barely missing san’s face, and san whips around faster than lightning. he grabs the wrist, and is about to twist and snap it when he registers the face in front of him. a smile curls onto his face.

“we’re allies here, did you forget? how can it be acceptable to try and take me out?”

“wasn’t trying to take you out. distracted. person shooting. wanted to get your attention.” yunho is speaking in breathless pants, sweat beading on his forehead. he grabs san and tugs, and san finds himself going willingly. he lets himself get pushed behind a pillar, as yunho scans for more aggressive men in black.

there’s a feeling san can’t pinpoint blooming in his chest, and he shoves it away, letting his god awful flirtatious nature come up as a defence.

“so sweet of you, darling. but you look more tired than me. i’d have been perfectly fine, but i appreciate the sentiment.”

yunho doesn’t realise he’s stilll holding san’s wrist, too busy being on the lookout.

“shut up.” he scowls

san sees a brief release of tension in yunho’s shoulders when he spots hongjoong safe, a few meters away surrounded by the remainder of his guards.

“you should go join them, sweetheart. it’s time for you to flee.”

yunho’s eyes snap towards him, and he angrily spits, “we’re not fleeing, you bastard.”

san wants to laugh again, because infruriating yunho is so, so enjoyable. “i didn’t mean anything. they’re all gone, anyway. we won. no point staying around for the cleanup.” he lifts his wrist to yunho’s eyes, and they widen exponentially. yunho drops his wrist and steps back, putting some distance between him and san. san decides he preferred it when yunho was pressed against him.

yunho makes to walk away towards a gesturing hongjoong, but san’s the one to reach out this time.

“thank you, yunho. i appreciate it.” yunho seems surprised by the sincereity that laces san’s words, but he quickly reminds himself that san is more than a proficient liar. he pushes san’s hand off his wrist, suddenly wishing he hadn’t tried to help.

stupid, stupid yunho.

“and don’t worry, baby. you always have my attention.”

and there it is, classic san. can’t have a conversation without dropping some kind of comment that made yunho’s skin crawl. yunho flinches, and walks away. san is staring after him, his lips upturned.

yunho picks his way through the bodies littered on the ground, trying to ignore both the vast amounts of blood, and the way that his ears are burning.

if hongjoong notices how red he is, he presumes that it’s from the physical exertion. he’s scanning yunho for injuries, relieved to find none. regardless, he pushes yunho towards the car, ready to take him away from everything and shelter him as best he can.

he shouldn’t have brought him here in the first place.

hongjoong can’t help the deep tug in his gut that compels him to look around once more before stepping into the car.

seonghwa is rushing towards san, and san is smiling so broadly it disturbs hongjoong. he’s certain that san is a psychopath, or at least someone who enjoys witnessing pain. or maybe he’s so desensitized that this has all become a game for him.

either way, hongjoong darts his eyes down and gets into the car. he pretends that the relief flooding his chest is for himself, for yunho and for his other men. not for the bodyguard of his rival gang leader, who just so happened to perhaps have saved his life.

fuck this.

hongjoong is absolutely fucking screwed.

yunho spends the same car ride trying to forget the deep voice echoing in his ears and the hand around his wrist. he’s all too aware that he was frantically searching for san the entire time the fight was happening, barely registering his members. he should feel guilty, he knows, and he berates himself fiercely.

why yunho, why? he’s a sadistic monster, he could have killed you and called it an accident!

but somehow, yunho can’t bring himself to regret that he threw himself in front of a guy that could very well be holding a gun to his temple in the near future.

yunho is also, absolutely fucking screwed

“he tried to help me, hwa. isn’t that so cute? i could’ve taken all of them blindfolded, but it’s still adorable.”

seonghwa purses his lips, a sharp pang striking a chord in his heart.

san is sitting on his desk, swinging his legs back and forth as he recounts the night to him, nevermind that seonghwa was supposed to be the one delivering the report.

“that’s the first time someone besides me has done that for you, san.” seonghwa says quietly, more to himself than to san. but his charge, his friend, hears it anyway.

“i’m attractive, hwa. what can i say? you tried to play hero too. good job on that, by the way.”

seonghwa flinches at the reminder. it was too close for comfort, the way hongjoong had been a split second from being overpowered, and seonghwa had moved before he had time to think.

“i’m sorry for getting distracted.” he had failed. seonghwa was supposed to protect san, yet he had some kind of messed up tunnel vision and sixth sense that led him to jump to the defence of someone he isn’t even supposed to associate with-

“don’t apologise. i’m a better fighter than you, or him. i didn’t need it.”

i forgive you. i understand. don’t worry, you did the right thing.

that’s how they communicate. with hidden meanings and the hope that the other party understands.

in spite of everything that went down, seonghwa’s frantic about one thing, and one thing above all.

it absolutely terrifies him how choi san is whistling a happy tune from his lips recounting the way jung yunho had tried to press him into a wall for his own safety. san chalks it all up to nothing, but seonghwa sees more. san isn’t just amused, he’s happy.

he’s happy that jung yunho had tried to save him.

it’s mortifying, seeing this unknown emotion on san. seonghwa knows how to deal with an angry san, a drunk san and an indifferent san. seonghwa knows san.

but seonghwa has never seen san care. and it sure as hell feels like san is starting to care.

“would you have done it?” he whispers, and san trails off, narrowing his eyes at him.

“what are you talking about?”

“would you have jumped in front of a gun to save him?” seonghwa bites his lip. please, please say something snarky and cocky and arrogant.

“i’d just shoot the source of danger, hwa. have you lost your touch? can’t protect someone if i’m dead, now can i? remember that next time, i doubt hongjoong would want to see you die in front of him.”

seonghwa’s ears are ringing.

protect someone? san, since when have you ever wanted to protect someone? everyone is disposable to you, no? why him? why now?

but seonghwa swallows all his words, and san continues on his painfully oblivious humming. he can’t even tell that this emotion is new and different. he can’t tell that his mind is drifting to a hand gripping his wrist, and the pressure of another body pressed against his.

word of the day: endearment. maybe san would do good to learn some new vocabulary, so he can put a label to that weird sensation in his chest, and his burning desire to see jung yunho again.

maybe, san would come to his senses. seonghwa can only hope.