#i need the second issue to come out RN

[madaramail]

this artstyle is so. spiderboba

[feelslikegold]

while I understand what this person is saying….the difference in how their partners are treated makes no sense to me lmao. I have seen the other partners (some who might argue are just as if not more private than josh’s) be included in fic??? with tabs kept on all of them to the point where fans even notice *instagram comments* left from them???? it’s so funny that only josh gets this kind of treatment when every other relationship (hannah doesn’t count) is obsessed over by fans…..

we don’t know for sure what jenny was to danny and yet why do I still see people casually mentioning her and posting about what she’s up to when her socials were private too while she was with him????? she was clearly very private and yet……?? people obsessed over talking about them…..

respecting their privacies should be happening, but respect all of them? the same? 😭 josh’s partner is treated like a curse if he’s mentioned which is pretty respectful ig, but why are there tiktoks of other partners along to the sound of “she’s getting that dick” like it’s just SO so fucking weird to me that this fandom does not respect women no matter what and has also treated josh so oddly when he came out 😭

[nonuggetshere]

GOD I HAD AN IDEA AS I WAS FALLING ASLEEP TODAY

About FaaF naturally

A sad one, TW fir near child death and harm

Involves Xero's attempt at an assassination, or it could be literally just any guard controlled by the Radiance

PK and WL need to talk about something private, and WL looks at the tiny vessel tagging along by her wyrm's side

"Should it be here?"

"It wouldn't understand anything anyway."

"Still, it's...a little..."

He sighs lightly, "Yeah, I get where you're coming from... Vessel, come here."

He kneels down and orders them to sit by the door and wait for them while they talk, says he'll come pick them up once they're done and not to move, then the two go to talk on the balcony and close the door behind them

At some point, Xero/the guard bursts in and attacks PK in the middle of the conversation, managing to take them by surprise and so gets one good swing in before PK darts away and retaliates, pinning them down with soul blades, though he has to keep his wife from killing them on the spot - he doesn't want to be so hasty, knowing they're infected and not themself. He pulls out the sword from his chest and that's when they realise, it's covered in void...

Child harm/near death TW beyond this point

After a moment of shock White Lady, who's closest to the doors, runs out and all her husband can hear is a horrified, heartbroken scream. He feels nauseous, his stomach twisting into knots and feeling like his heart is in his throat as he runs out after her. He sees her in tears, cradling a tiny bundle soaked in void. There's- there's so much void. It covers the floor where he left their child vessel and soaks through his lady's shawl and clothes as she cradles them in her arms.

For a moment he's paralysed, before he just snaps. He flies back onto the balcony, screaming at the possessed guard that he'll kill her, he'll make her pay for this, and he slays them in his rage (something he'll regret and feel ashamed of later), still hitting and screaming at Her well after the possessed person is dead and she can't hear him anymore.

He collapses, panting, near tears, and just gets himself up and stumbles out the door and towards the two, he wants to see how bad it is for himself.

Flower survives, but just barely. They had multiple stab wounds and lost their left arm, if not for their parents immediately healing them they'd be dead. They're barely older than 5, still so very little and defenceless, PK is horrified at how could anyone hurt a baby this young and helpless (hypocrite), even if they're not alive.

They're still on bed rest because that was so much damage and their mother doesn't leave their side and their father only leaves when necessary. They still don't realise Flower's alive and they know they shouldn't be so attached but it still feels like their baby and they can't just leave them. WL spends the entire day by their side, gently stroking their hair and horns with her now permanently void stained hands and softly coos and sings to them

Of course, they quickly realise they ARE alive because no way in hell a toddler is getting this hurt and NOT crying and screaming the second they wake up <3

Which just makes this situation so much worse

[mysteriouslybluepirate]

Hi

Yeah, I've seen the 1 min 30 Izzy teaser. I've seen it many times. I'm choosing to not go crazy on here because the second I do, I will abandon my WIP, and spend all day going in mental loops.

I'm just stuck on feelings of- 'damn we were right' (happy) and 'oh, damn, we were right' (devastated).

[ace-with--a-mace]

please keep my family in your thoughts and prayers (my uncles health condition deteriorated and we gotta go to ny to visit him, my mom also having to actually talk to her dad for the first time in 20 years and fix her daddy issues, i have to moderate screaming matches w my grandpa and mom and also im meeting up w the guy i crushed heavily on who liked me in the few days we're staying there)

[vitiateoriginator]

Before, my datemate and I were considering adopting a second cat once we move into our new apartment but now we're thinking about getting a dog instead 👀

[prettyflyforawhitelie]

Hi I love your work so far, do you think you could do headcannons for all the different characters of the main Hazbin Hotel cast when their lover comes to them injured? Like how they would treat you and then how they would deal with the person who harmed you. I would love to see this ahhhh 😫

Ahh of course! I love this, thanks for the request! I hope you like it!

Trope: Hazbin Hotel x Injured!reader

Characters: Alastor, Charlie, Vaggie, Angeldust, Husk, Sir Pentious, Lucifer

Warnings: Physical violence, mention of death, injured reader, blood.

author's note: hey guys! this is my first time doing one of these, and I'm still getting better, so forgive me if its a bit shabby. If you have any requests, feel free to send them in! I'm in a creative buzz rn lol. Enjoy!

🦌📻Alastor📻🦌:

The day that your attacker decides to hurt you is the day that they decide to die. Messing with the Radio Demon’s plaything is about the last thing you want to do. 

Alastor often sent his shadows to follow you into town when he couldnt be with you, so the second you were attacked, Alastor could sense that something was wrong. 

By the time his shadows had carried you back to the hotel, your attacker had already escaped, but luckily, his shadows saw everything.

When he rushed down to see you, he seemed rather indifferent at first. He carried you up to his room, immediately conjuring several healing ointments to heal you quickly.

He laid you in his bed, in which you almost immediately fell asleep.

He hears the whispers of his shadows, and gains all of the information he needs out of them. 

With a single snap of his finger, the issue was taken care of. Rumor has it that the screams of your attackers' seemingly “random” death could be heard about 3 rings down. 

While waiting for you to wake, Alastor conjures two steaming bowls of his mother’s jambalaya. Placing one on the side table next to you, he sits down next to your sleeping body and lightly grazes your head, singing soothing songs until you wake up.  

😈🗝️Charlie🗝️😈:

Would of course be so very angry at whoever did this, but her first priority would be healing you up and making sure that you’re absolutely 100% okay and comfortable. 

Would set you up in her bed and assure that you have anything at all that would make you feel more comfortable. Tea? Yup. Ice pack? Already got it. Cuddles? Of course!

Would definitely let you cuddle with Razzle and Dazzle for as long as you needed.

She would try her best to talk to you and figure out what happened - to figure out who did this to you.

As you told her, she seemed surprisingly… calm? She simply thanked you for telling her and left the room. 

Though Charlie doesn't seem like a particularly violent person… She can get protective over the people she loves. So, let's just say she got that issue taken care of real quick. How stupid to mess with the Morningstar family. 

🪽⚔️Vaggie⚔️🪽:

Anybody in her vicinity needs to watch out when she hears that her love is hurt. 

Like, seriously, heads will roll. But not before she checks on you to evaluate how badly she needs to fuck up the person who did this to you. 

When she sees you, bruised and bloody, she can't help but hold you so tight and cry, scolding you for getting yourself into a bad situation without her there to protect you.

Vaggie knows what it feels like to be beaten and dumped on the side of the street like garbage. She could never forgive herself if she allowed that to happen to anybody else, let alone the genuine love of her life. 

When she asks for the person who did this, you can only give her a vague description. That’s alright though, she will use her former exterminator skills to scan all of Hell and find the person who dared to do this to you. She will not leave this alone until she serves you justice. 

🕷️💖Angeldust💖🕷️:

Coming home from the studio to find you in his room, crying and bruised, he immediately drops whatever he’s doing and comforts you in the biggest hug ever. 

Angel has plenty of experience with being abused and left to fend for himself, so he doesn't immediately resort to asking questions. No, that’s not what you need right now. You just need to know that you’re loved, beautiful, and that this does nothing to affect your worth or value as a person.

He carries you from the floor to his bed, covering you in blankets and laying next to you with Fat Nuggets. 

“It’s okay baby. You can cry, it's okay.” he whispers as you sob into his chest.

He allows you to initiate the conversation of what happened, not wanting to push you past your limits. 

Once he finds out what happened, he knows what he has to do. He waits until you fall asleep, and heads down to the club where your attacker happens to frequent. For once, being a famous pornstar will actually serve in his favor. He tempts your attacker to follow him, and immediately beats him to an absolute pulp. 

He allows the person to live, saying “I am only letting you live so you can know how it feels. You ever try this shit again, and I will find you. Except that time, you wont leave here looking so… whole.”

♥️♦️Husk♦️♥️:

Husk is used to all the residents of the hotel bitching and moaning to him about all of their issues. With Charlie coming to him and oftentimes crying about the many failures of the hotel, tears were no foreign sight to him.

But coming from the kitchen to the bar and seeing you there, looking an absolute mess, was different. 

“What the-What the fuck happened?” he yells. When you flinch, he knows that something happened.

When you explain to him what happened, he immediately needs a description of the attacker. He takes possibly the largest shot you've ever seen and storms out of the hotel.

He wishes that he could do more to protect you. Back when he was an overlord, he had power beyond anybody's imagination. He could've snapped a finger and your attacker would simply disintegrate (but not before he tortured him a bit first). But now that Alastor owned his soul, his powers were limited. 

You know what wasn't limited on husk, though? His pure physical strength.  

He immediately finds the guy walking on the street adjacent to the hotel (dumb, right?) and absolutely obliterates him. 

As the attacker is begging for his life, he just keeps hitting, blind with rage and love for you.

When he wants back into the hotel bloody and exasperated, he sits in the stool next to you and wraps you with one of his wings. 

“It’s all okay now. I’m here” he says as you lean on his shoulder, so ready to go to bed. 

🐍⚙️Sir Pentious⚙️🐍:

Sir Pentious always loved coming to your room to show you his many zany inventions. Normally you welcome him in with open arms, a sweet smile on your face, but today was different.

When he knocked on your door, he was met with absolute silence, which isn't normal for you. When he listened a bit closer, though, he could hear your small sniffles. He trusted his gut and slowly opened the door, fully ready to be denied entry.

Instead, you looked at him shyly, turning away and crying. He could've sworn that he saw a… black eye?

He took this opportunity to come and sit next to you on your floor, placing his arm around you and letting you lean your head on his shoulder. 

When he noticed that you were calming down a bit, he asked you what was wrong.

You explained that while you were engaged in a turf war, some ruffian beat you up, and badly. The girl you had momentarily teamed up with had left you behind, and you were left to trek back to the hotel on your own, barely able to walk. 

You could see something change in his eyes. 

He curled his tail around you, his cool skin calming your nerves. He assured you that he was here now, and nothing like this would ever happen to you again. He then swiftly called his egg bois to entertain and comfort you while he prepared his airship. The idiot that did this to you was going to pay, and not just in turf.

😈🐣Lucifer🐣😈:

Bursting into Lucifer’s room, the only thing you could mutter is “Help” as you fell into his arms. 

He frantically carried you to a chair and tried to assess your injuries. Man, someone fucked you up, and badly. Too bad he would kill them before they could brag about their success. 

He rushed to find ANYTHING that could help you. Bandages, ice, your favorite food, a rubber duck, ANYTHING. 

When he finds you absolutely passed out asleep in the chair, he gently moves you to his bed and tries his best not to stir you. 

As he sits watching you, thinking of your beautiful smile (and how he’ll brutally kill the person who did this to you), he observes your features with great detail. 

When you wake up, you smile. Lucifer must have gone, but sitting on your table is a bowl of soup and… is that a rubber duck that looks like you?

[weirdmageddon]

i posted this on twitter also but it’s still eating at me. i’m so fucking embarrassed to be jewish rn. i dont want to be associated with this ongoing bullshit from israel. why do we need our own state. theyre just making every jew across the globe look bad in general even though many of us are conflicted about zionism and the legitimacy of israel as a state

people have hated jews throughout history for no fuckin reason but now israel exists but now its like. GIVING people reasons to hate us as a group. note that i DON’T conflate zionism with jewishness, but a lot of people in the world don’t know the difference because theyre uninformed and been dripfed cultural antisemitic tropes their whole life and that’s the scary part is them falsely putting two and two together. like what the fuck israel stop youre just putting fuel on the fire for people around the world to hate an entire group of historically persecuted people if youre being this shitty with your insane colonialism and apartheid like……I Want No Fuckin Part Of This. you’re spelling our own doom. you cant just swoop in and go “mine now” and then oppress the people you took land from under a regime without my blood boiling at the injustice no matter WHO you are. even if my lineage is tied to you. so when news outlets support israel it doesn’t feel like they have the best interest of jews as a people in mind. it’s in the interest of a zionist ethnostate and whatever that christian zionism belief is about the jewish people returning to the holy land as prerequisite for the second coming of jesus. its not like they care about us as a dispersed ethnocultural group, it’s all for that religious narrative that a bunch of people in the US are backing.

saying you want all jews to die is antisemitic. beating someone up because they’re jewish and no other reason without knowing their views is antisemitic. criticizing human rights violations perpetrated by israel and the belief that one group deserves more rights another is not antisemitic. and the fact that israel has the ability to pull that antisemitism card in response to criticisms of the violations they commit because their state is the “jewish homeland” drives me fucking insane. take fucking accountability for your actions. and yes, there do exist full-on anti-jewish groups in the middle east that go beyond hatred of israel’s policies and existence as a state and i’m tired of people pretending there aren’t in fear of appearing to seem like they support the state of israel. on the other side of things many people overestimate this by fearmongering and saying EVERY arab is out to get jews worldwide, telling people like me “they want YOU dead”. this is not the belief every person in the middle east and it really rubs me the wrong way that people group millions of individuals into all-encompassing lumps like this. many people there do understand nuance of this political situation.

even if i have that “right of return” by israeli law or whatever, i don’t feel obliged to it; it does not register as fair. why do i have a “right of return” when i’ve never even been there in the first place while palestinians who have homes there can’t return to them? what’s the basis for that? substituting objective reality with an imaginary reality? i don’t think like that. i can hypothetically come and go whenever i please but palestinians are severely limited in mobility? what makes me more entitled to that land than the people who lived there for centuries? nothing that comes from natural law thats for sure. it’s all artificial and inflated.

but at the same time i also dont want to be the target of antisemitism and caught in the fray just for being ethnically jewish. once people start calling for the genocide of entire groups we’ve got issues (and you better believe this absolutely applies to the palestinian victims in gaza too), because people who dissent to the violence perpetrated by the loudest are caught in there with the people who are perpetrating the violence. lack of nuance. people conflating israel and its zionist apartheid policies with jewish ethnicity and culture worldwide. other people conflating being terrorist anti-jew with muslims worldwide (like that 6-year old palestinian-american boy that was just stabbed to death in chicago). scary times man. but as a jew i can’t just opt out of this if it’s how i was born as. i don’t have control over that. but i can control what i think and what my beliefs are

[erwinsvow]

i’m lime green jello rn… need some jealous shy!reader and rafe

rafe had said he invited some other friends. you thought it would be a quiet gathering, just topper and kelce like usual, playing their games and discussing whatever it was your boyfriend talked about with his friends over beers.

you didn't do so well with big crowds, something rafe knew already, but you were getting used to hanging out with the three of them together. you got along with them well, and they didn't seem to mind your quietness like you worried they would.

in the car ride over, rafe told you some other people might be coming. you had tensed up immediately. your first thought was wondering if you could handle being around new people, your second if you could make it through the night like you had originally wanted to.

you knew it was stupid, it always felt that way. and normally rafe was so understanding about your personality, so accommodating. you felt guilty even bringing it up tonight, not wanting to burden him with your issues. sucking it up, you went inside, thinking you could make it work.

you did for most of the night. after rafe left to try and sell like he always did, you talked with kelce and topper on the couch, eating pretzels while they went through beers, introducing yourself to one or two people who came to say hi to them.

you didn't do well away from rafe in situations like this. yes, it was fucked up, that you were so reliant on your boyfriend. you knew it and didn't care anymore, craning your neck to see where he'd gone off to.

"he's over there, princess," kelce comments, gesturing to the far corner of the room. the nickname made you feel clammy and embarrassed—it only felt right coming out of rafe's mouth. you turn to look, watching rafe talk with a pretty girl, leaning in close to say something, the girl smiling and laughing.

in that moment, everything went silent except the sound of your heart thumping in your ears. she was pretty, with an aura of self-assurance that you so profoundly lacked. she didn't seem painfully shy or skittish, she didn't seem like talking to a stranger made her face burn and shoulders shake. she talked to your boyfriend like she knew him, like they were close.

jealousy rakes over you, painting your features green with envy. first, that rafe was talking to this girl so closely, that he had forgotten about you on the couch with his friends. second, that this girl seemed like the epitome of everything you wanted to be—surefooted, confident, pretty enough that she knew it without someone having to remind her all the time.

"who's that?" you ask, though it comes out shaky.

"uh, i think that girl he used to date-" topper starts, but kelce kicks him in the shin. "ow, what the fuck?"

kelce shakes his head, motioning with his eyes to your figure, eyes fixated on your boyfriend and the girl.

"oh, um, the girl he used to hang with. yes, hang out with. that's right," topper corrects with a cough.

it all seems like background noise. you get up, leaving the boys on the couch and heading towards rafe without a second thought. when he sees you, he smiles, opening his arms to bring you in. you don't lean in though, like you always do.

"hey, kid. this is my friend sofia."

"hi," you say, smiling at the pretty girl. "nice to meet you." you turn to rafe, talking so quietly he has to lean in. he brings an arm around your back, bringing you a few feet away.

"hm?"

"can you take me home, please?"

"y'just got here. what's up?" you hesitate for a moment, faltering. then you glance back at rafe's friend, looking at the two of you, her gaze on rafe.

"i didn't come here to watch you talk to some other girl all night." rafe blinks, a little taken aback. in all the months he's known you, he doesn't think you've ever said something so sharp to him.

"excuse me?" he thinks you'll apologize like you always do.

"you heard me," you reply, crossing your arms. "can you take me home or should i walk?" even with your attitude, the question is asked politely, or so he thought. "if you're so busy with her, i'll walk."

rafe laughs, and your eyes get watery. it would be one thing if he understood your feelings once you said it, but he laughed. you turn away, when rafe grabs your arm and keeps you close to him, bringing you further away from the crowd of people.

"what, kid? you jealous, hm? is that what this is?" tears spill down your face before you can stop them, an angry retort bubbling up. it dies in your throat before you can get it out. "she is a friend, s'all. you got that?" rafe brings his knuckles to your temple, tapping softly.

"you didn't tell me about her, and topper said she's your ex girlfriend-"

"he's got a big fuckin' mouth. we went out once. one time. haven't seen her since."

"you invited her-"

"i invited two people, she came with them. now, you want me to leave with you?"

you feel another tear spilling down. you don't rafe to leave the fun for you. he brings his hand to your face, wiping it away.

"we can go right now. don't care. not here for her or anyone else, here for you. got that?" you nod, leaning into his touch. an apology lingers on your touch, but you refrain, still a little angry.

you grab rafe by the collar of his shirt, pulling it in towards you and into a kiss. you stay like that for minutes, not letting go while you make out, catching the attention of others around you. when you let go, his shirt is wrinkled and his lips are red.

"okay, let's go." he follows you out, laughing to himself.

"jealous. you're cute, kid."

[sweet-as-an-angel]

Hii, I was wondering if you could possibly write about what kind of p*rn you think Ghost and König like? (And other characters if you want! )it’s just been floating around my head for days and you’re one of my favorite writers. If not, that’s totally fine! 💛💛💛

MW2 and Their P0rn Preferences

Warnings: 18+, Heavy Mentions of P0rn0graphy (none shown), Mention of Poor Mental Health, P0rn w/ Feelings, P0rn w/o Feelings, BDSM, Knife Play, Breeding Kink, Historical P0rn, Mention of Hardcore Lesbian P0rn, Mentions of Masturbation, University Lecturer/Student Relationship, Body Worship, Daddy Kink, Sadism, Mentions of Torture P0rn, Mention of Sex Tape,  Mention of Insecurity, Mention of Alcohol, No Pronouns used for Reader except ‘You’, Profanity, etc.

A/N: Tysm, Anon <3 ! Also, I’ve changed any mentions of the subject material to p0rn as to skirt around any potential censorship issues.

Ghost:

Given the absolute S T A T E of this man’s mental health, I think he secretly watches p0rn for the plot.

No, really. I mean he genuinely watches p0rn for the storyline; though not just any storyline.

It has to have feeling, romance. Love.

Though he’d never, ever, EVER admit it, he watches it to fill an emotional void in his life rather than a sexual one (ejaculation is just a bonus - he sees it as more of a duty to his body’s needs rather than his personal ones).

Definitely favours p0rn where it features a couple who have reunited after a long stretch of time and…well, have at it.

He found that there’s a startling lack of this in the men’s category, though, so he goes and finds it in the women’s because p0rn there is a lot softer, much more sensual, and doesn’t feel as creepy.

Ghost isn’t a fan of typical straight p0rnography; he thinks it’s too violent and unrealistic.

Instead, he watches ones where the couple aren’t just fucking or having sex - they’re making love.

And, really, beneath all the death and decay and bloodshed his life has become buried under, Ghost wants what those couples have.

Maybe if he knows you and likes you, he’ll jack off to the thought of you in those situations with him - absolutely even more so if you’re his partner.

Ghost would NEVER divulge the actual p0rnography he consumes - not even to Soap.

Whenever the guys back at Base would try and draw the truth out of him - Johnny especially - he’d tell them to “Pipe the fuck down” and “Get back to work.”

However, if he were a little loose-lipped via the aid of booze, he’ll cast the 141 a false line.

And when Johnny comes asking him what his preferences are again, Ghost won’t even cast him a second glance as the lie spills between his lips as he, Simon Riley, with all the conviction of a man accused of a false crime, says “Hardcore lesbian.”

And nobody will think to even question it.

König:

If he’s in a dom mood, something hardcore, though nothing outright sadistic; especially if he’s just returned from a mission.

Instead it’ll be, at most, some bondage, maybe some marking here and there - really nothing too wild.

He saves that for when he’s with you.

On the contrary, if he’s feeling a little raw from his time away but still needs to relieve himself, he’ll watch something similar to Ghost in that whatever he chooses to jank himself off to has to have a storyline. And love.

Though, his may be just a smidge more softcore than Ghost’s in that maybe the more dominantly perceived of the couple bottoms on occasion, or there just isn’t as much sex in favour of a richer storyline.

Most of the time, König actually never makes it to the stage of jacking off because he’s so invested in where the protagonists’ relationship is going and starts getting emotional.

This happens if you’re away and not within his immediate vicinity because he can only think of yours and his relationship.

98% of the time, he gets to the end of the video, realises he’s gone half limp, and just decides to go and watch a rom-com instead.

But don’t be fooled.

The second you arrive home, he’ll be on you like a blanket.

And he is not letting you go until both your needs are met.

Soap:

Something conventional yet with a distinct Johnny twist to it.

I can see him reading Playboy mags, for one, though this is more to get himself hard rather than to alleviate himself with.

He goes for something stronger when he wants to get himself off.

Definitely into the whole jealousy/possessiveness trope, so anything where one of the leads gets jealous for one reason or another and just destroys their partner afterwards is his type of media.

Johnny strikes me as a switch with top lean, so he’s much more likely to put himself in the position of the dominant lead instead of the lead receiving punishment.

Soap definitely gets off on some degree of dumbification - more so that, when the dom lead is almost through with their partner, said partner is just a heaving, whimpering, cum-soaked mess beneath them.

That, and body worship.

Soap wants to see a loving relationship wherein the leads truly love each other and find each other physically attractive (reflecting Johnny’s relationship with you), so to see one or the other in these on-screen relationships tell the other what they love about them gets him a little hot under the collar (though the collar may have been long discarded).

That’s the home stretch that gets Johnny off.

He also watches p0rn to improve, in a way.

Occasionally, he gets a little insecure that there may come a day where he can’t meet your needs, so he uses p0rn as a training ground to make sure he’s at the top of his game.

And many practice sessions with you too, of course.

Price:

University professor x Student.

Change my mind.

No clue what brought this on in him; I feel like this may have just been something he experimented with one bored evening and found that it worked, so he just kept consuming it. Or, it phased into his psyche after being so high in the chain of command for so long.

Either way, he usually can only get off to being in a position of dominance and power.

Though, he does have other preferences when it comes to how he asserts this dominance.

Sometimes he’ll watch historic p0rn (stay with me on this) where there’s a couple in the 40’s - one of whom is a soldier, the other the caretaker of their shared house -  who are able to return to each other.

And then they…well, what couples who’ve been separated by war and worry usually do in these circumstances.

I feel like Price may have a preference for the couple being straight, but only for the aspect of one of them being a traditional housewife who the soldier wants to start a family with.

Pretty wholesome concept. Pretty unwholesome execution.

Price isn’t a fan of violent p0rnography, so it’s pretty ordinary and vanilla, but it satiates his breeding kink.

And my god, does this man have a breeding kink.

Not that anyone else on Base knows that.

They know literally nothing about his sexual preferences, and, given he’s their superior, they rarely push the issue when he shuts it down.

Alejandro:

Slow and sensual wins the race.

Man loves a good story – especially if it starts with an argument and one of the leads having to comfort the other by…making it up to them.

Alejandro’s an intense, romantic man, so it would stand to reason that his p0rnographic preferences would match his personality.

Definitely into body worship and praising, both giving and receiving.

The top lead has to be attentive to the sub lead’s needs, to the point that there are slivers of tears running down their cheeks because they feel so good.

Alejandro also has an unintentional preference for edging.

He won’t let himself finish until the sub lead has first; out of habit more than anything else.

If you walk in on him watching it, he’ll be absolutely shameless.

Will beckon you over with a dashing smile and say something to the effect of: “Mi amor, come here. My lap is lonely without you in it.”

Only uses p0rn as a last resort; so if you’re asleep, or away, or just don’t feel like having sex that night, Alejandro will excuse himself and do his business in the next room.

Nothing compares to you, though; these encounters with nameless couples on a screen cannot hold a candle’s light to the flaming glory of euphoria Alejandro feels whenever he is near you, never mind inside you.

And he reminds you of this daily.

Man’s a nymphomaniac, what can I say /j.

Gaz:

For him, it changes.

He’s the youngest in the 141 so he’s more likely than the rest to experiment (the least likely being Price because he’s found his genre lol).

So, really, it is very difficult to pin down his preferences.

However, I will say he takes a liking to p0rn that is very much unexpected.

I mean Hollywood-tier movie twists and turns that would have any outside observer assume that Gaz was just watching an action film the perfect cover.

He did take a fancy to skydiving p0rn once (just people doing it in the air while they’re skydiving - don’t ask how).

But when the crippling reality of how that would work logistically crossed Gaz’s 500 IQ mind, he lost his passion for it.

Let’s just say, whipping your ween out at that altitude with that much pressure against you while falling at a solid 130 mph is more likely to result in the appendage being taken by the wind than anything else.

Aside from that, Gaz has the widest range of tastes in the 141 since he experiments the most.

He has found he has the strongest preference for threesomes.

Only because he’s kind of fascinated by the concept and how much coordination it would take to execute the whole operation.

It genuinely actually started when he couldn’t get to sleep one night and had to go online to read up on the logistics – how these throuples worked and the statistics associated with them.

And now, here we are; crippling p0rn addiction.

/j

I am actually joking; Gaz doesn’t even jack off the most out of the 141.

Graves:

Threesomes, orgies, gangbangs - you name it, he’ll enjoy it.

Superiority complex; he needs to feel in control over as many people as possible.

As most CEOs do.

As such, anything where the lead is in control is his go-to, though he won’t watch straight-up torture p0rn.

However, the lead is typically disproportionately stronger than the co-lead, so you can take that to mean that Graves watches generic p0rn targeted towards the male mass market; so usually something rough with a storyline so flimsy and thin that the terrible acting is made ever more transparent. Apparent.

Graves looks to p0rn only to fulfil himself; if he wants to feel loved or worshipped he’ll just go to you.

When you’re unavailable, however, he’ll just jerk off to the infinite stream of p0rn he has.

Or, considering how rich he is, he’ll get you to make a sex tape with him and just watch that.

Man’s got the money to make it happen; he ain’t janking it to a 144p video of low-quality blocks doing it.

Into body worship (as previously mentioned).

Also really into foreplay.

His favourite’s a kidnapping scenario. No clue why, I didn’t wanna ask. But I get the distinct impression it has to do, yet again, with his superiority complex.

(Daddy Kink Enjoyer; don’t tell him I told you that).

Valeria:

H A R D C O R E  P O R N

Seriously, the amount of sheer sadism and violence it takes to get her off is concerning.

It comes with the territory; you run a cartel, you lose a bit of humanity; it’s the way of the world.

If you’re not around, Valeria will take to watching some of the most toe-curling, gut-wrenching p0rn you’ve never seen.

I’m talking hard BDSM, knife play, blood play - you name it; if it’s violent, Valeria will most likely have gotten off to it.

Has gotten off to security footage of her torture sessions with her victims before now.

However, she isn’t like that with you (unless you want her to be).

If you prefer her to be more gentle, she’ll simply just go and watch p0rn to satiate her more adventurous needs, saving her soft, loving, tender side for you and you alone.

But, if you want to experiment, Valeria will put all that she has acquired through torturing and p0rn consumption and take you on a one-way trip to pound town.

Big fan of lesbian p0rn, regardless of whether she’s actively in a relationship with a woman or not.

For this specific genre, she loves seeing women in strap-ons.

Just does something to her (call it feminism).

Also a big fan of heavy bondage, marking and intimidation.

She simply enjoys dominion over everyone, regardless of gender, identity – it doesn’t matter to her.

And you are no different.

However, she’d never actually hurt you - not in ways you didn’t want her to.

Because, at the end of the day, she loves you more than life itself and would buy the stars to see them sparkle in your smiling eyes.

Rodolfo:

Accidentally clicked on a pop-up for a free iPad once and it was all over from there.

I'm kidding (mostly).

Rudy doesn't jack off very often, what with his work and physical training taking up so much of his time.

As such, his tastes aren't fully developed as of yet, so he's still at the stage where seeing two people sat on the same sofa is too much for him.

Jkjk. But not too far off the mark.

Rudy will watch whatever's popular at the time, but only because he doesn't know what else he likes, and so doesn't actively go searching for it.

He can't stand bad acting.

He understands that it comes with the territory of consuming p0rn, but he doesn't see it as an excuse to be lax when it comes to the believability of the story and the acting.

When he eventually gets sick and tired of it, he'll just go and read an erotic novel.

Has become somewhat of a connoisseur of the erotic book genre; he has favourite authors, authors he wouldn't touch with a barge pole, preferred genres, etc.

His favourite genre at the moment is friends to enemies to lovers reconciliation novels.

Just loves how, no matter how bad things may seem during the book, everything comes together at the end :-).

Everyone gets a happy ending, everything is resolved.

Secretly, he actually enjoys these novels for the story rather than the sexual content.

Please protect him, he's so wholesome <3.

Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously :-)

Masterlist Masterlist [Continued] Masterpost Modern Warfare AI Masterlist

AO3 Wattpad

[mncxbe]

Absbsjskajnshajks idk if you’re taking more requests rn, but if it’s not an issue could I possibly request a part two of that fic you posted about reader having a cat ability which means that they’re sometimes in heat??😭😭 maybe with Tetchō and Jouno (only if you feel like it)

Yes of course and my requests are always open although it may take a while to write them♡ Also added Dazai to this one I hope you like it.

1.50♡ p2

𝑫𝒂𝒛𝒂𝒊, 𝑻𝒆𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒖, 𝑱ō𝒏𝒐 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: itty-bitty smut♡/ fluff??

°☆○ 1.50♡ ~ part 1

𝑫𝒂𝒛𝒂𝒊

this smug bastard takes advantage of your state in the most subtle ways; lingering touches, flirtatious smiles and passionate kisses

at work he teases you more than usually, describing all the sinful things he'd do to you if you were in a more private setting👀 really just gets you all riled up for nothing

but when you two get home he acts like a completely different person

"What, bella? do you need something from me?" he always asks with a smirk on his face "Maybe some assistance with your little... situation?"

doesn't lay a finger on you until you practically beg him (nicely); it's not like he'll ever admit it but hearing your desperate pleas really boosts his ego

he does his best to help you in other ways too. he'll do more chores around the house and write your reports at work if you really can't handle them. overall he's a good guy♡

Dazai was lounging around the office, wasting time and avoiding his chores; since you had been sent on a mission, your boyfriend didn't had much else to do. He had his headphones on and was listening to some funky song when you suddenly walked behind him.

Leaning over his frame, you swiftly hooked a finger beneath one of the speakers and lifted it.

"Boo" you whispered lowly, your hot breath sending a shiver down his spine.

"Ah bella here you are. How's my pretty girl doing?" He tried to get up from the couch but you pressed further on his back.

"Bella... Come on let me get up and give you a kiss. I missed you" he whined

"Oh trust me baby. I want way more than a kiss" you said in a teasing voice.

In a matter of seconds, Dazai was back on his feet and had you pinned down on the couch, a mocking smile on his face.

"You're that desperate for me, bella? You've only been gone for a couple of hours. You really can't spend that little time without my touch?"

Your gaze darted around the room, hoping that no one could witness the position you were in.

"I'm in heat, Dazai." you confessed quietly.

"What was that? I didn't quite catch it?"

"I said..." you began, rosy petal blooming on your cheeks "I said that I'm in heat, Osamu. Because of my ability"

"And what does that have to do with me, huh?" he tauned, lips hovering just above the shell of your ear. "Do you perhaps want me to have my way with you here? In the office?"

Your body quivered slightly at the sound of his low voice, making him giggle.

"Get up, bella. And go finish your job so we can leave early."

You nodded your head in agreement before straightening yourself. As you were making your way back to your desk, your boyfriend called out to you:

"Oh and bella?"

"Yes?" you asked sweetly

"Don't forget to ask Kunikida for a free day tomorrow. You'll be needing it after tonight" he replied with a wink, causing your blush to deepen.

𝑱ō𝒏𝒐

you don't have to tell him that you're in heat, he can smell your arousal

just like Dazai, this man gives you the most condescending smile and shamelessly teases you throughout the day

if you work someplace else he'll send you texts to check up on you and gently remind you that he'll provide any help you need once he gets home

but if you're part of the Hunting Dogs good luck. he's all over you all day, making snarky remarks about your "condition"

Jōno also likes to hear you beg; hearing your thumping heartbeat and sweet voice when you tell him how much you crave him really turns him on

will cook breakfast for you if you're too tired in the morning

Jōno woke up with warm sunshine on his face and your sleeping figure next to him. This hour and a half before work, when you'd both wake up and cuddled for a while then have breakfast together was among his most cherished moments.

Usually you'd wake up just minutes after him, turning to face him with a wide smile on your face as you sleepily uttered a "Good morning Sai" and showered him with kisses. Except you didn't do that today.

Jōno knew by the accelerated rhythm of your heart that you were awake, but you were not moving an inch.

"Darling? Is there something wrong?" he asked softly, placing his hand on your waist.

You quickly shook your head as you curled up in a fetal position "No, I'm good, I'm okay". Your voice was shaky and low, as if you were pain.

"Baby please, if you're hurt or not feeling well then please-"

And then it hit him; a strong, intoxicating scent coming from your body. A cocky smirk rose to his lips when he finally understood the cause of your distress.

"You're in heat, aren't you?"

You suddenly turned to face him with a pleading look on your face. "Yea..."

"Well then we must do something about that" he teased, his hand sliding to your thigh. "Would be a shame to let you go to work like this."

Your boyfriend expected you to protest just like you normally did when he initiated such things in the morning, but today you were so compliant. You scooted closer to him, leaning into his touch; eyes glazed in lust.

"Well aren't you needy today, princess?" he inquired playfully. He gently pushed you onto your back and spread your legs, the tips of his fingers skimming along your clothed slit.

"You're so wet already, princess. I can feel it through your clothes" The little moan that left your lips when his lithe digits slid beneath the wristband of your yoga shorts reverberated through Jōno's entire body.

With a swift tug at your pants and underwear he had you undressed, thumb lazily circling your clit. His hot breath fanned against your parted lips.

"Sai, gimme more~" you babbled out, fiercely seizing his wrist as you guided his fingers to your entrance.

Your boyfriend only smiled at your desperate attempt, ceasing his ministrations. "Take what you're given, sweetie. Or I won't give you anything at all" he purred, teeth grazing the shell of your ear.

You immediately complied with his order and released his arm. "Good girl. See, it wasn't that hard, was it?"

Suddenly, he plunged two of his fingers into you; stretching your leaking hole. A ragged moan escaped your parted lips as your nails dug into his forearm, causing your boyfriend to smirk. Your sinful sounds were like music to his ears, clouding his mind with lust. There was nothing he loved more than coaxing those delicious moans and whimpers out of you.

His digits pumped in and out of you at a steady pace; his thumb resuming its circular motions on your puffy clit.

"God baby I'm so close" you uttered in a ragged voice, thighs instinctively squeezing together.

Just as you felt the familiar heat pooling in your core, Jōno removed his hand from your underwear.

"Won't you look at that, love. We gotta go to work or we'll be late." he said tauntingly. You let out a loud hiss at the loss of touch.

"Sai, don't you dare leave me like this-" you cried out but it was too late. Your boyfriend was already on his way to the bathroom.

The rest of the morning was spent in silence hence you decided to punish your partner for teasing you. Of course, you were aware of how much Jōno enjoyed himself; a scornful laughter escaping his lips whenever you dodged his touch and kisses.

"I'm gonna head out, love. Good luck at work!" he voiced before leaving, but you didn't reply. A few seconds after you heard the door of your shared apartment close with a thud.

You spent most of the day in a state of utter annoyance and frustration, not being able to focus on any task you were given. All you wanted was for your partner to take care of your needs but instead he treated you like a plaything, leaving you brimming with pent-up desires.

Around 2 p.m, your phone chimed, announcing that you just received a text from Jōno. A rosy blush rose to your cheeks as your eyes scanned the glowing screen:

'Hi princess, I hope you're doing well at work. I know you're yearning for my touch but I promise I won't leave you unsatisfied tonight. Just be my good little girl and wait a few more hours. I know you can do it♡"

It's safe to say that that night, your boyfriend kept his promise.

𝑻𝒆𝒄𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒖

my sweet angel he's the most caring person ever istg. he's a bit confused when you tell him that you're in heat since he doesn't really know how that affects him??

but once you explain that you'll need him he blushes so hard; but he takes it well

Tecchou take princess treatment to another level during this time. You get to relax after work while he does all the chores and cooks food

he prepares baths for you or spontaneously buys you a bouquet of roses♡ he's really sweet

you're never left unsatisfied in bed, like never. he has an incredible stamina and a never ending need to please you

The setting sun painted the blue sky of Yokohama in shades of purple, red and ochre, a warm light glowing through the high ceiling windows of the building. Tecchou was compiling his last report for the day when you peeked your head through the open doors of his office.

"Hi Hiro. Got a minute?" you beamed, lips curling into an impish smile.

"Of course, darling. Come inside."

Your sweet boyfriend didn't suspect anything as you closed the door and walked up to him, hips swaying gracefully. You positioned yourself on his lap, snaking your arms around his neck.

"So Hiro. How soon can we go home?"

"Soon. I just need to finish the paperwork." he replied, pointing at the half written page with his black fountain pen.

You pushed your lower lip forward into a pout, impatiently swinging your legs. "Ok but how soon is soon?"

Without taking his eyes off of the report, your boyfriend shrugged. "In a few minutes but... if I may ask, why are you so eager to get home, darling?"

"Oh, well" you said in a honeyed voice "I don't know if I ever told you this but because of my cat-shifting ability I sometimes experience heats"

"And?" he pressed, utterly unaware of what you were implying. His slender fingers were gingerly caressing your hips, making you shift uncomfortably in his lap.

"What I'm saying is that I'm horny, Hiro. And I need you to fuck me."

Your boyfriend's eyes shot open and he droppen the pen, little droplets of ink splattering the pearly sheet; the grip he had on your hip also tightened.

Pleased with his reaction, you ran one hand down his chest, slightly tugging at the buttons of his vest. "But of course we don't need to be home for that. There's plenty of space here" you added, patting his wooden desk.

Upon hearing your daring proposal, Tecchou's face turned a light shade of pink. "I mean... We're at the office my love but I promise I'll take care of you at home, ok?"

You give him a small nod and a peck on the cheek before hopping off his lap. "I'll be waiting for you in the car. Hurry up"

As you walked towards the door you could hear a sudden rustling of paper as your boyfriend haphazardly attempted to finish his work. He caught up with you just as you were exiting the building; of course, you didn't fail to notice his ragged breath. He'd probably ran down the stairs. You let out a soft chuckle as you noticed this.

"So, darling. Is there anything else I can do for you besides, you know...?" he asked sweetly "I mean, how does this affect you?"

"Well, I tend to lack in energy levels and I have a terrible attention span. I was actually thinking about taking a week off work 'till I feel better."

"I see..." After thinking for a few moments, Tecchou grabbed both of your hand and spoke in a solemn voice "Then I will do my best to do as many chores around the house. I'll cook dinner for us too so don't worry about it. Just focus on feeling better, ok?"

The look on his face was of pure devotion and determination; causing warmth to pool in your core.

You rose to the tips of your toes and cupped his face with your warm hands before pressing your lips on his. The kiss was tender and loving at first, but you soon found one of your hands entangled in his coffee-coloured locks as soft moans rolled off your lips. He swiftly scooped you up and made his way to your car.

Your boyfriend placed you in the backseat before taking off his cape and discarding it on the passanger's seat.

"Wait, Hiro. What are you doing?"

His skilled fingers quickly undid the buttons of his vest and he slid it off his shoulders, leaving him only in his tank top which showed his toned arms. All this time his hungry gaze was locked with yours, making you shiver with anticipation.

"Well darling. I guess you're not the only who's eager tonight" he said before joining you in the rear seat; hurriedly closing the door behind him.

[littlewigglers]

Okay I’ve never asked on tumblr but I just found your page and I’m OBSESSED!!! I want to get/make a Vivarium/bioterrarium for millipedes and isopods and I can’t WAIT!! Please please if you have any advice at all, I’d love to hear it! Where to get supplies, the buggies themselves, how to handle them, what do you do if they get sick, how much space to they need for how many there are, etc? Your buggy babies are so cute!!

First off thank you! I love all my little guys as well <3

I ramble kinda a lot so I'll put this under a read more.

For advice I'm still very much a novice when it comes to keeping but I'll tell you what I can!

For tanks I got my glass ones second hand or ones made my the store I buy used to buy my millipedes from, you'd be surprised how cheap you can get a nice big one! For Acrylic THESE are the ones I've had the best luck with not warping BUT they sometimes have kinda blurry parts on the plastic, but still I'd say good for the price if you can't afford glass. I tape up some of the ventilation holes to keep more moisture in.

For soil that ISN'T bought from a specialist stores(Sometimes I can't afford it) I use Peat free compost, paired with leaves and rot wood I buy off ebay stores that sell bug/reptile products, I mix them together with some water and leave them in a tub for 1 week to soften up the leaves. Some people go out and get their own leaves and wood but I'm not really in an area to do that so I can't give advice on that. It's important to keep it moist BUT NOT WET!

Heat mat! You want one to put on the SIDE of the tank and not under it, just one would be enough. I have a timer plug for mine so they're on a few hours a day on and off all day. If you REALLY wanna spoil them then I've seen a few people use reptile headlamps.

For moss and plants I again just buy it off ebay in sheets and give it a cheap over to make sure there are no hitchhikers on it before I put it in the tank. It needs watered and looked after for a while for it to take to the tank. Carpet moss is mostly for looks while sphagnum moss is used to keep moisture in areas and should be water/sprayed often. I have a little fern plant in my tank rn they seem to leave alone. I know a lot of people use fake plants as well for decor!

You should make a point to put a little temp and humidity monitor in your set-ups as well. The special reptile ones can be expensive so I just but the little ones you put in rooms and have had no issues with them.

Don't forget to give them hides! Cork wood/bark or coconut shells are nice and cheap. You can also use man made items just make sure they can handle the moisture and aren't made of anything toxic to your new friends. Also give them little sticks and things to climb up on. Just make sure the lid is secured so they can't escape.

For food I just use kitchen scraps like carrot peel, cucumber, apples and melon, give them a cuttlefish bone and some dried tiny shrimps in small amounts once a week or so, but you can also use fish flacks instead. But remember! Leaf litter and rot wood is meant to be their main diet for most species.

For the millipedes I would recommend Ivory millipedes as a good starter one, they're lovely in colour and are often up top, hardy as well, and usually you can get them captive bred which I've had much higher survival rates with vs wild caught. For each species you'll have to look up their needs yourself though, there isn't a 100% catch all set up for all species. Woodlice/isopods I'd suggest dairy cows as they're lovely and also very easy to get a hold of. I will say species of Armadillidium(roly poly/pill bugs) are my fave and I'm very biased and want 500 of them.

For handling just be gentle! I wear gloves in a lot of my videos but that because I've incredibly sensitive skin and can't stand soil under my nails. The worse they can do to you is them staining your skin(not all species), or give you a little nibble. Make sure if you're handling to wash your hands off BUT be careful what hand soaps you use! Wash hands after as well some can be toxic to bugs from what I've heard.

For tank size hmm that's hard, usually you want soil as deep as their body but that can be hard, 10-15cm is what I aim for my BIG boys and 7-10cm for my others, deeper is better but sometimes you'll also just never see them again! You'll want a tank at least a few times longer than your pets body or at least big enough for them to filly stretch out in if you get really big millipedes like giants and a 120cm tank is just kinda unrealistic haha.

I do not have a lot of advice for if they get sick sadly, it's kinda of hard to tell honestly and usually when you can it's too late. I would just say don't beat yourself up too much if some pass away sometimes bugs just do that especially if you don't know their history.

Where to get them depends on where you're from and what you want. A ton of reptile/specialist stores will have wild caught which isn't great but they will have the largest range of species and usually also sell all the stuff you need to tank care of them. Ebay is where I've gotten most of my captive bred and I just message people if I've questions about their bugs there.

I think that's everything I can think of,

Again I'm a big novice when it comes to bugs, @onenicebugperday and @crevicedwelling likely know way more than me, though idk if they're open to questions but they likely already have a lot of info on their blogs.

[whyse7vn]

BREAK -

[ot7 x reader]

PEACE AND LOVE 😁💗

8 participants - 8 online

———————————

jk: guys i’m lost ☹️

jimin: like emotionally??

tae: or sexually?

jk: woah um

idk anymore

jin: probably psychologically

yoongi: what’s new?

namjoon: jungkook you are in your kitchen

y/n: can confirm he is in the kitchen.

yoongi: loser

jin: what’s with the punctuation lmao

jk: woah i am in our kitchen

how did i get here

good morning guys ^0^

jin: it’s 7pm?

y/n: he’s hungover.

jk: yeah T-T

jimin: not surprised drank jin’s body weight in alcohol yesterday

jk: there was a lot going on :((

yoongi: so you result to alcoholism?

namjoon: it’s better than resulting to violence!!!

y/n: hoseok can’t relate.

hobi: i said i’m sorry 😓

jin: jimin i’ve thought about it and i really think you’re projecting when it comes to this weight thing

jimin: project a vegetable

jin: project a cure for the body issues you CEARLY have

namjoon: guys

jk: ants playing ddr in my head rn

i’m so upset

also how do i take about a loan?

i want a loan

namjoon: jungkook you do not need a loan

jk: ok

i’m sorry

namjoon: jungkook you better not be crying right now

jk: i’m not crying

y/n: he is crying

but that is not important rn.

can we talk about yesterday because what the fuck?

tae: YESSS i’ve been waiting for this

whoever wants the video of hobi punching the shit out of jaehyun you have to me pay at least 4k

namjoon: what is wrong with you

tae: if you want it with sound i have to charge extra

tae changed the gc name to “HOBI GOT HANDS”

y/n: not funny.

namjoon: taehyung please

jin: can’t believe hobi fr punched him

yoongi: i can

hobi: y/n you still mad??

jin: she’s using punctuation

she’s furious ☠️

jimin: sHe’S fUrIoUs 🤓☝🏼

who tf says that

jin: OHMYGOD GET OF MY DICK FOR ONE SECOND I’M BEGGING

jimin: sHe’S fUrIoUs 🤓☝🏼

tae: is she fast too lmao

y/n: shut the fuck up taehyung

tae: okay!

y/n: my boyfriend is fine btw

if any of you actually care

yoongi: don’t

hobi: i’m sorry

y/n: you laughed after you made him bleed

yoongi: didn’t you laugh too lol??

y/n: OKAY I DID A LITTLE

but that’s before i realised hoseok hit him for real

jin: you can hit someone for fake?

tae: you can watch her smile fall after the second punch in the video it’s really funny actually!!!!!!!

y/n: didnt i tell you to shut the fuck up?

tae: you did

i’m sorry

shutting up

like rn ong 🙏🏼

🤐

jin: ?

jimin: it means on god

jin: stop talking to me

jimin: sorry just making sure you got it

slang sure has changed since 1781!!!

jin: 1781????????

jk: omg that’s that one hamilton song

hobi: there is no hamilton song called 1781

jimin: are we talking about the 1975

tae: the what

hobi: aren’t they white?

tae: they????

jimin: HAMILTONS WHITE????

yoongi: the real one is

jimin: there’s a fake hamilton??

tae: hamilton a they/them?

namjoon: you can’t say that

y/n: why are we talking about hamilton?

tae: why can’t i say that?

am i pissing off the feminists? ☠️☠️☠️

namjoon: this has nothing to do with feminism

jin: i’m a feminist

tae: did my they/them hamilton question offend you??

jin: tf does that even mean

jimin: born in 1066 doesn’t even know what pronouns are

jin: fuck you and ur proverbs

y/n: he literally said pronouns

tae: i’m a prosexhaver

yoongi: you have stds

hobi: personally i would like to shoot taehyung

jk: sex haver????

jin: virgin

y/n: he makes me sick

jimin: oh i HATE him

namjoon: deep breaths

tae: ???

wtf

why did you all just turn on me like that?

guys are you jealous of my sex having abilities?

everyone be honest now

y/n: you clearly don’t know what shutting the fuck up includes

tae: ok i’m sorry

never speaking again starting in like

an hour

i promise

y/n: how about now

tae: 30 mins?

y/n: kys

tae: stop flirting omg 🤭

yoongi: idiot

jk: WAIT OMG?

HOBI FR PUNCHED JAEHYUN??/! ö

jin: you were literally there??

jk: I THOUGHT THAT WAS A DREAM

OHMYGOD

LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

HEHEHE

OMG HOBI THATS CRAZY

UR CRAZY

hobi: i’m not crazy

jimin: like crazy

y/n: you think it’s funny??

jk: NO

no

absolutely not wtf

????????

hoseok why would you do that?

that’s so messed up

shame on you really

shame on you

jimin: ur pathetic actually

namjoon: anyways hobi it was wrong of you to result to violence just because you were jealous

please apologise

y/n please accept his apology you know hobi wouldn’t never want to upset you on purpose he loves and cares for you deeply

kiss and make up guys

you don’t want to fuck up our group dynamic do you???

no?

didn’t think so!!

wow would you look at that we are all friends again

smooth like butter 🧈 💛

dynamite 🧨

borahae in this bangtan shit for life 💜💜

y/n: kys

jk: KISS???????????

jin: hobi was jealous?

hobi: NO?????????

yoongi: interesting

jimin: yeah that’s crazy

hobi: I WASN’T I SWEAR

namjoon: you weren’t???

oh

my fault

hobi: yeah your fault

maybe ur just projecting lol

jimin: yeah calling bullshit

if you didn’t punch him out of jealously

what did you punch him for???

tae: it’s cuz he was like feeling her up right in front of our faces right??

have he no respect?

jk: respect no he have?

tae: stop

jk: sorry

tae: actually nvm you were agreeing with me

agree some more

jk: i agree some more

tae: see?

jk: see??

tae: what a nasty pervert freak of a man

namjoon: look in a mirror

jimin: that’s crazy because i wasn’t talking you

tae: right joon shut the hell up

jk: zip it

jimin: you as in YOU taehyung and jungkook

i was talking to hobi not you guys

jk: oh

tae: we talk for hobi

hobi: no you don’t

tae: we ARE hobi

jk: i’m not hobi

or am i?????

ohmgod am i???

yoongi: ur all so annoying

y/n: ok hoseok wasn’t jealous are you stupid??

why would he be jealous?????

hobi: right!

i was drunk

jin: i swear you didn’t drink last night??

hobi: ur not helping?

jimin: i’m telling you it’s bullshit

tae: ok now let’s talk about how that was coolest thing hobi’s ever done in his life should of tagged me in fr fr

i would of gone crazy no joke 💯💯

we would of got him so bad hobi

#dreamteam 😍

namjoon: taehyung

tae: what?

i’m just saying

y/n: say one more thing

tae: i’m sorry

sorry

SORRY 😢

jimin: so the plot thickens!!

hobi: there is not plot

there is no jealousy

jin: ok why did you punch him then

hobi: i was drunk i said that already

jin: you DIDN’T drink

guys why is he lying to us

do you not trust us???

come on step into my office hoseok

open up to daddy jin

y/n: ew???

jin: ew?

y/n: that’s what i said

jin: but in spainnnnnn

y/n: stop

jin: 🫰🏻

yoongi: hobi do you want to fuck y/n?

hobi: what

yoongi: answer the question

y/n: yoongi wtf???

namjoon: yoongi please

jk: DO NOT ANSWER DO NOT ANSWER DO NOT ANSWER

hobi: i’m not answering that wtf

jimin: i think we all know his answer anyways

yoongi: yeah

but i want him to say it

tae: waitttt kinky

say it hoseok 😋😋😋

namjoon: can we not rn…

jimin: tae you definitely need to add him to ur stupid little group chat

tae: ummmm

it’s not stupid it’s real actually

jk: real men only!!!

tae: hobi are you a real man?

hobi: what

tae: are you real??

hobi: yeah

jk: say it

hobi: say what?

tae: i’m real

hobi: i’m real?

tae: REAL UGLY

HAHAHA

jk: LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

hobi: u guys are so unfunny it hurts

tae: got you lolz

namjoon: taehyung stop talking

tae: forgive me? 🥺

hobi tried to come for what we stand for

hobi: i literally didn’t???

it was jimin

jin: hey wait what group chat??

let me in what the hell

yoongi: no

jin: ur in the gc too??

yoongi: am i?

jk: he is

tae me joon and yoongi 💓

namjoon: can you stfu.

jin: EVEN JOON??????

let me in or ur all going to hell

y/n: yeah me too wtf??

tae: jin

between me and you

your invite may arrive soon

i’ve seen your eyes wondering as of late

jin: ????

what

yeah ok nvm!

i think i’ll live not being in ur gc

and if this is about what i think it’s about

count me out

jk: aw man :/

tae: wow so many haters in this life

you’ll regret this

you’ll be begging on ur knees to join real soon

y/n: WHAT ABOUT ME HELLO????

jk: hiiiiiii ^_^

y/n: ykw nvm idc

yoongi: you do

y/n: not

yoongi: yeah ok :3

namjoon: there is no group chat

jk: ??? yes there is don’t be silly joon 😂😂

namjoon: OHMYGOD LEARN HOW TO TAKE A FUCKING HINT

can we move on

wtf why am i asking you guys

i’m the leader

we are moving on.

y/n: THIS IS SEGREGATION

jk: ohmygod is this a race thing???

namjoon not again

jimin: LMFAOOOSJDJJK

y/n: i mean i was talking about gender

but this could be a race thing

is this a race thing????

jk: OHMYGOD NAMJOON UR A SEXIST TOO????

i thought that was just jimin

jin: no ur right

jk: oh ok!

jimin: can you stop

i’m NOT a sexist ok

but hobi DID punch jaehyun

hobi: wtf is ur problem

jimin: sorry i needed to put everyone back on track xx

hobi: there is no track

jimin: no there is a track and i put everyone back on it

jk: train track

yoongi: lay on one?

tae: LAYOVER YES

i know that album

it’s really good

indigo flopped

namjoon: shut up shut up shut up shut up

tae: so like gf wyd rn? *kicks feet giggles*

yoongi kicked tae out of “HOBI GOT HANDS!!”

yoongi: not sorry

jk: it’s ok i forgive you

yoongi: shut up

jk: ok

y/n: he told me we should go on a break…

jk: i had a break on my bike once

then it broke

so i had a breakless bike

and i couldn’t brake

so to stop i would just pedal into walls

my bike to this day has no breaks it makes me sad

namjoon: jungkook please just get a new bike

and y/n i’m sorry to hear about your break

jk: ok >.<

y/n: thanks ig

namjoon: wait

??????

break

ur on break

with jaehyun?

y/n: no i’m on a break with fucking usher

jin: A BREAK?????????????

jimin: WOAH WAIT HOLD ON

yoongi: is he fucking stupid???

jk: USHER???

hobi: no jungkook she’s talking about jaehyun

jk: oh

hobi: jaehyun

nct jaehyun your friend jaehyun.

jk: OHMYGOD WAIT WHAT WHATWHENDHDHDJDJD WHAT OHMYGOF OHMSYSH DKEJEJDJG SISHDJXMISSHENDODJDIDUSJEJFJDKDKFNDBDNDMDNDFNFNFNFMMF

jk added tae to “HOBI GOT HANDS!!”

jk: LOOK

tae: hey guys u missed me 😁?

jk: LOOK

tae: looking

jk: LOOKSKKSKSKDKDKDDKK

tae: holy shit

y/n are you ok??

jimin: THIS IS INSANE

y/n: yeah fuck him and fuck his break

yoongi: i’ll break his neck

jin: jungkook get ur friend

jk: JSNDNDNNDJJDJDFJNDJDJDJDJD ahshshxhdnxndnxnd JAJSHDBSBDBXBXNXNXJXJXJZHHXHXBSHSHSHXHZJZJXJXJXJJXJXJJDD SHSNDNDNDNDNXNDJJDXJXJXJX DHXJDJDNDNDNXXNZN

tae: woah

hobi: but are you like actually ok???

y/n: never been better

namjoon: no fr it’s ok if you’re upset

y/n: i’m not upset

jimin: wow

so like

wow

idk how to comfort people namjoon say something

namjoon: there there?

jin: chin up!!!!!

jk: I AM ALSO SINGLE THIS IS SUCH A COINCIDENCE LIKE WE ARE BOTH SINGLE AT THE SAME TIME WOW LIKE YEAH UR ON A HREAK BUT UR BASICALLY SINGLE THATS REALLY CRAZY LIKE HAHA LOL WE ARE SINGLE LOOK AT US TWO SINGLE PEOPLE WHO HAPPEN TO LIVE TOGETHER MAYBE WE SHOULD IDK LIKE HEHEH JSJSJJSJDJ

yoongi: when are we jumping him??

i can leave now

y/n: shut up

yoongi: you coming over?

y/n: no?

yoongi: boo

y/n: i’m going to hobi’s

hobi: you are??

jimin: to fight or fuck??

y/n: shut up

jin: that’s crazy

hobi broke up a happy home

hobi: i’m genuinely so sorry

i didn’t mean to

y/n: wasn’t even ur fault don’t apologise

he was a acting weird for a while

wanted to live in denial but it’s whatever idc!!!!!!!

tae: you clearly do care and that’s ok

y/n: i DON’T

tae: y/n

y/n: taehyung

jimin: ew like why is taehyung being all serious i hate it

tae: cuz this is serious

y/n: it’s not

tae: it’s ok to be upset

y/n: i know and i’m NOT

tae: y/n

y/n: i’m not upset omg????

stop being weird i’m like so ok it’s crazy

jimin: like crazy lolz

jin: that is the second time you’ve made that joke and it was just as unfunny as it was the first time you said it

jimin: why are you keeping tabs on me and what i say get a LIFE

jin: you make me want to kms

jimin: do it

jin: namjoon get him before i get violent

namjoon: guys can you see we have bigger issues going on rn

be serious for once

y/n: i’m fine

there is no serious issue

i’m ok

no tears

no noting

i’m fine ok? ok

tae: y/n

y/n: tae stop

ykw ur pissing me off

ur all pissing me off

y/n left “HOBI GOT HANDS!!”

hobi: oh wow

jin: i didn’t even do anything fr

jimin: i blame tae

yoongi: jaehyun is a bitch

jk: do you think she’ll let me kiss her now?

namjoon: jungkook shut up

tae do NOT message her

and yoongi do not even THINK about leaving your house rn

i think we need to have a group meeting or something

—

sorry this sucks i just needed a reason to get rid of jaehyun so we could move forward LMAO i’m sorry better things coming soon 😁🙏🏽

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @k4ngelz @jmnscutie @sopebubbles-replies @cynicalyoongs @lightningpussy54 @eunthv @gigiiiiislife @lowkeykin

[babyyweebbitch]

König headcannons

y’all, imma start writing for Call of Duty now 💃🏾🕺🏾 i’m currently playing both call of duty modern warfare and MW2 so if i get anything wrong i’m sorry i haven’t finished either 😔💔 i’m sorry i’ve barely been active! life is very fucked rn, but onto big boi könig headcannons

there are times he will come home from a mission or something very sore because he gets thrown around/hit a lot, he will go to you for a massage or a warm bath (you both had a large ass tub installed in one of your bathrooms because of how big he is and he can’t fit in a regular sized tub)

if he decides to go outside without you he will have to have something of yours in his pocket like your bracelet or one of your pins just so he’s comfortable. he once had a panic attack in target and you had to drive up there to finish shopping with him at another target because almost all of the shoppers stared and watched instead of help him

he’s the type to kinda just eat the pickles after he said no pickles on his order because he’s afraid of making the workers mad. you always have to go tell the workers yourself and he kinda pleads with you for 5 minutes not to and that he can eat the pickles or take them off.

when he asked you out the first time he was a blushing, shaking mess. you two have been friends since you were kids so you knew how he was and how he didn’t like confrontation at all so you just waited patiently and even told him a few times he can text it to you or something if he couldn’t speak. he eventually got the words out and he was fully expecting you to say no and leave but five years later, you’re still together!

he knows his own strength and being 6’10 and over 230 he’s pretty strong — he once hurt you by accident while playing and he refused to touch you for two weeks, he even hid in the closet for hours after it happened because he was afraid you were mad at him. you explained you weren’t mad at him and that it was just an accident

he speaks to you in german while in public, he only does this when he’s anxious, doesn’t wanna talk to anyone or he just does it for fun

has a bunch of pictures of you in his hidden album so he can look at them while he’s away.

you went to the hospital for about two months for a health issue that needed to be fixed and i swear König was having withdrawals at home without you. he obviously visited you all day but on non visiting days/hours he had withdrawals at home, he hated sleeping in the bed alone and he hated not hearing you somewhere in the house doing something. the house was very silent that two months. when you came back he didn’t leave your side

he likes to mess with you a lot if you’re a lot shorter than him. if you ask him for something he’ll kinds just hold it up in the air out of your reach, but then feels bad after 30 seconds and he stops

he takes Christmas abnormally serious, he decorates the whole house, makes christmas themed things/foods and even gets you both matching ugly sweaters! he got one that said “his elf” “her/his elf” and you both wore it on any gatherings he was willing to go to.

he has lured a cat into the house with cheese three times and now you have three cats — congratulations. he almost did that with a deer but you caught him mid lure and you still him from adopting a deer

has kept the same card you gave him when you were kids, he puts it in his pocket while on any missions so he has something other than pictures to remind him of you and remind him the reason why he’s coming home every time

he secretly likes being little spoon (don’t tell him i told u that)

you’re the only person who has seen his face — not even his closet friends in the military have seen more than his hair and face

he let you wear his gear once and he has millions of pictures of you in his gear because of how big they are on you

he has never wanted to get married before dating you, but now that’s all he can think about, only with you tho! marry him >:(

[astrolavas]

Who do you think Hunter will stay with at the end of the show? Or who do you want him to stay with

tbh out of all the possible future caretakers of hunter, my primary hope for who will adopt him rn rly is camila. y'know, loved all the different possibilities too but…. camila ❤️❤️❤️ like, just. like. that's his MOMMMM

the vision of him living with camila (and luz and vee), going to hexside (cuz obv there's gonna a portal), and having a woodcarving mentorship under the clawthornes' and some mentorship under darius. and then once in a while occassionally staying over at the owl house.... Y'KNOW? so real.

camila's just too perfect of an option, LIKE. he spent months under her care already, he doesn't have even one bad experience with her that could possibly make him doubt and feel bad abt their relationship (no feeling like he needs to prove himself to gain her respect, no complicated past that'd have to be dealt with, no wondering if the care he's shown is genuine, no previous authority issues, no previous hostility etc etc) like camila's been extremely sweet and caring towards him and nothing else since the very start. it makes me sOO... 🤲😔❤️

the very first MOMENT they interact and hunter kneels in front of her out of respect she warmly tells him to never do it again; makes it clear that he doesn't have to be overly formal with her. just offers her kindness, expecting nothing in return. right away.

camila is probably the first adult ever that hunter associates with only warmth and goodness and whom he feels comfortable with from the start, with whom he doesn't have any past grudges or things they'd need to work out, just.. unconditional love. and justttt just just oughhhghh she called him baby. she's been basically treating him like her son already, and she's SUCH a good and supportive mom, to luz, to vee, to hexsquad. she taught him how to sew. she DIVED into FREEZING WATER at an OLD ABANDONED CEMETERY without a second thought in order to save him. JUST!!!!

him wanting to impress her with the spanish. her touching his shoulder and him showing not even an OUNCE of fear, just smiling and knowing she's not going to hurt him. him taking up interest in camila's and manny's old hobby. camila having experience with dealing with grief.. oof. him being happy living in the human realm (wanting to do things in the demon realm as well but having ties to BOTH worlds). even the fact that the entire noceda family is clearly neurodivergent, just like him. even him being an animal enjoyer and camila having a vet clinic, which- he WOULD LOVE to volunteer there in his free time, like?? COME ON.

AND THIS???? okay......

and we KNOW he WANTS to have a permanent family. it's established at the beginning of the episode when he looks sad as others hang up their family drawings. he wants ppl to care abt him, he wants to have a place to call home, wants to feel safe. he cries (from happiness) when luz calls him family.

and camila cares abt all of these kids so much. she was willing to take vee and hexsquad in JUST LIKE THAT. we can even assume her and manny wanted more kids, like just OUGHHGH she wouldn't even have to think twice before taking hunter in permanently. and she most likely knows hunter doesn't have anyone. she's not going to let him just….. go away on his own after everything is over, or make him move out or sth 💀 she'll want to help him, she'll want him to be safe and cared for.

like the only other possibilities for who else hunter could stay with after the show were: darius, eda/the clawthornes, or joint custody. but imo after... he lived under camila's roof for MONTHS, found a place that he feels safe in.. nocedas are just the best and healthiest option for him. after he'd spent MONTHS feeling happy with camila, i don't think it'd be good for him to be thrust into a completely new environment, and.. there's simply no time for his connection with other adults to be properly fleshed out, or to establish that he'd prefer anyone over nocedas.

like, i feel like sth has to happen with darius as well cuz their arc is unfinished, esp since it's been hinted they've grown closer since ASiAS, and there's a lot they could talk abt now re: grief + darius' mentor... so they HAVE to reunite at least. however, in my opinion at this point of the show there'd be just no time to conclude it as a parent-child bond in a satisfactory way. especially because there would be a LOT they'd have to work through first, considering their very complicated past.

like, all these years in the coven, their relationship pre-ASiaS, how darius treated hunter all these years... we know their relationship has progressed positively since ASiAS (even though mostly in the background/subtext) but still, i feel like it'd definitely take a while until hunter felt truly comfortable while living at darius'. he'd probably worry that it's conditional, could even easily fall back into his old coven mentality/habits, would try to make darius proud no matter what, etc. etc. it wouldn't be the healthiest for him. although eventually he would get comfortable, and that concept also had sm potential, but like the journey to that wouldn't be quick, and it'd have to be an arc on its own too. and, again, there is no time for that. rly cheering for a reunion and a talk, maybe even a mentorship of sorts, but considering hunter already has a place he feels fully comfortable in and ppl who consider him family right now, i feel like him ending in a completely new place after all that wouldn't be his #1 preferred option.

same with eda/the clawthornes tbh; it had sooo much potential and he is technically related to them AND is going to find that out soon, so some kinda interaction/development HAS to happen, and he did say he wants to learn how to carve palismen, so a mentorship may also happen... but as for actual adoption mm i don't think anything can come close to how safe and happy and Good he's felt for those months while under camila's care. again, in the future things COULD develop in such way, but considering we have two episodes until we get a conclusion... mmyeah

so................ yeah.

i just have so so so many thoughts abt hunter finding a family and getting to be a teenager and feeling loved and feeling like he has his own place in the world and being safe and allowed to explore his interests and to be himself........ hunter nocedaaaaa oughhghhh 🤲❤️

[itsangelll]

WE NEED A PART 2 ON THE OLDER TOM DATIMG A GIRL WOTH DADDY ISSUES 🫶🏼🫶🏼

A/n: OF COURSE if it’s short I do apologise ENJOY! <3

I’m sorry but LOOK at him his face is just so kissable I swear to god and I think that’s an invitation for me to sit on his lap.

𝐎𝐥𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐨𝐦 𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐝𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐲 𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞𝐬 𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟐 <𝟑

Read at your own risk.

•hmmm I feel like Tom would definitely kick anyone’s ass if they ever came up to close to you

•he’d get jealous very easily like he can not take it when he sees you laughing with another guy or touching another guy he will drag you out of the place so fast

•definitely would have hickeys all over you

•he’d love to see you all dressed up for him “Awh my girl dressed up just for me how cute”. then he would fuck you senseless <3

•if you guys were out he would definitely tease you like running a hand up your thigh, telling you how much of a good girl you are for him

•HE’D GET YOU FLOWERS I KNOW HE WOULD. don’t even argue with me about that one 😀

•you’d seriously get along with the band and they would also try to help you out with personal things.

•his hugs are the best don’t even.

•IMAGINE LIKE IF YOU’VE DONE THE WRONG THING AND HE JUST LIKE FULL ON GIVES YOU A LOOK THEN RUBS HIS THUMB OVER YOUR BOTTOM LIP LIKE GIVE ME THAT RN.

•if he ever met your mum he’d be so sweet to her I know for a fact that Tom would love your mum as well LIKE AWH.

•if you had siblings I know he’d treat them so well he’d have sm love for them

•I bet he could pick you up easily in one second and just showering you with kisses

A/n: I found this in my drafts and i decided to finish it off 😭. There will hopefully be two fanfics coming out soon which I am SO EXCITED for, please keep sending in requests mwah bye cuties <33

Taglist:

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@madzandmore

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