#i never post doodles this rough anymore

[krmayertalks]

Elsens, getting high on Soylent sugar, which is making them hallucinate the ghosts of the souls in their drugs. All of this is too much for a single mind, they discorporate into smoke.

but they’re real cute while they’re doing it, so

[kj-munch]

new pfp new mee babyyy trying to remind myself that this is MY account i can do what i want with it . disconnecting myself from the madcom theme, ill still be drawing it ofc but like i mentioned on another post a weekish back i want to allow myself to post non madcom art too. hoping to start drawing more frequently again soon

[kuroowo]

Post break-up HCs

- Gojo x Reader x Geto

Genre - Angst, Hurt/No comfort, Exes, No-Curses AU

Masterlist

The relationship was hurting you more than you could bear. It reached one too many dead ends and faced with your final straw, you decided to let go of their hands and leave them watching your back.

At first, Geto & Gojo didn’t and couldn’t accept it & were trying to reason with you at every chance they could get. No matter the time or place or event, if you were there, you would spot them and their mile long reasons why. Over time though, Gojo was the first to accept the reality of your relationship whereas Geto was a bit more stubborn in believing that this was just a very rough patch the three of you were going through.

However, after awhile, Gojo and Geto seemed fine. Outwardly, that is. To the rest of the world, it’s as if they’ve moved on relatively easy (for such a sweet looking and long standing relationship) and it was like you never really made that much of an impact on them. But to the keen eyed, it was terribly obvious how in love they still are and how they can’t seem to let go no matter how much time passes.

Note - I personally think in a world without curses and it’s looming threats, Geto & Gojo would be more open (in many senses/aspects). I’d also like to think that you complete them. IMO they’re both individuals with a strong sense of independence and freedom, but their communication could be better and sometimes they need to be grounded. I think you bring that to the table and it makes everything work so smoothly that the three of you can’t be anything but soulmates. At least, that’s what STSG believed. It’s what they still believe, even after you left them.

Gojo, who can’t let go because he associates much too many things with you and the memories of you.

Every little thing, whether useless or useful or in passing or significant or eye catching, it doesn’t matter — every single thing reminds him of you. A little trinket he spots during his travels, a cute dessert spot he could’ve dragged you to, places you would’ve loved to visit, Megumi’s pets you loved to pet and spoil, kikufuku, little doodles, coffee shops, certain accessories, anime shows and merchandises, & etc. etc. (Gojo still accidentally buys a number of things meant for you, and he doesn’t ever bother to return them)

It physically pains him to a stop the first few weeks because when he turns to his side, it’s not you and Geto anymore. It’s just Geto and the sorrows you left behind. (He accidentally texts you the first few weeks because he was still in a little bit of denial. He blamed it on habits, but even that he knew was blatant denial)

It didn’t help either that during the first month, he wouldn’t stop talking about you. Nearly every conversation, nearly every passing comment, Gojo would not miss the opportunity to relate it to you somehow. Nanami tapped out at day 6, Shoko tapped out at week 2.5 (surprisingly long, he thinks), and Haibara, sweet Haibara, still listens to him to this day. It’s not very often anymore. He’s learned some semblance of self-control (he thinks you’d be proud and also because his pride wouldn’t let him do it much anymore), but on days where he can’t seem to shake your hold on his heart, he goes to Haibara. (He can’t go to Geto because the first and last time it happened, they got into a fight and then tried to call you after. He couldn’t tell if the constant ringing haunts him or elates him, since that means you didn’t block him)

Note - I would like to think that Gojo in a No-Curses AU would be more open to talking about his feelings/being vulnerable/being open to his close confidants to some degree because well, the weight of the literal world doesn’t rest on his shoulders. He doesn’t exactly cry to them, he more so just… talks about you. Nanami could be drinking an Americano and Gojo would tell him that you liked yours in a certain way, as if he was telling him about the weather outside. As time passes, he talks less about you, but on days he can’t seem to shake off the heavy feelings, he’d talk about his memories of you & what he knew about you.

Geto, who can’t let go because he’s still in the belief that you’d turn around and come back to them, to him.

Geto can’t fully accept the reality of you leaving them, so his fractured heart feeds him with grand ideas of you knocking on their door, with tears in your eyes and flowers in your hand, begging for them to take you back. That you had a lapse in judgement and went through a period of craziness that convinced you that you didn’t need them. You’d apologise, sincerely and earnestly, and with open arms he would snark at you, but kiss you almost urgently in the same desperate breath.

He longs for such, more than he would ever be willing to admit. So he puts on a brave, nonchalant face. Smiling and chuckling, touched with a twinge of tension, and goes about his days being branded as someone you left.

An ex who still yearns for you deep down, and it manifests terribly in his dreams. (Sometimes, Suguru would wake up with tears staining his cheeks, but he’d refuse to acknowledge it)

An ex who used to tease you about the silly Sanrio plasters you used to buy for yourself, but now has a drawer full of them. One by one, he’d pay for them whenever it catches his eyes. One by one, stored in a space you used to occupy. Untouched and waiting to be used.

An ex who still keeps the knickknacks you gifted him. Handmade and one of kind, “Like you.”, you used to tell him. His heart still flutters. He keeps them packed and hidden in a compact box, sealed with memories tainted in quiet regrets and dried out anguish. His favourite will always be the two little clay dolls you made. One’s a snow white dragon with ugly bulging blue eyes in the shade of Gojo’s and the other’s a black matching pair with tiny purple irises in the shade of his. You promised him you’d make a version of yourself so the three of you could match like those lovesick couples you always made fun of, but you never got around to it. 3 weeks later you were gone, and a year later he’s still waiting.

Note - I think Geto would take it really hard in the lonesome comfort of his own presence. Keeping every single thought, tear, and hopes locked in his big, brittle heart.

It doesn’t do well on them that you share mutual friends either. It makes them want to be petty and hurtful, make you see what else you could lose, but when they catch your smiles and laughter in their peripherals, it simmers their bastard urges and quiets them down into pitiful longing.

It’s even worse when the kids ask about you because they didn’t know how to tell them that it was a lot of their fault why you left them.

Megumi, who loved you most out of all of the children, took it the hardest and it made Gojo & Geto hurt in different ways. But surprisingly, Megumi was also the fastest to bounce back once he realised that you breaking up with them doesn’t mean you’ll stop interacting with him too. “Don’t be silly, Megumi. You have my number and new address, just call or text or visit whenever. Nothing much is changing between us, y’know? Unless you wanna get rid of me?”, you can’t help but tease him when he pouts at you. Gojo & Geto couldn’t have been more jealous (and maybe even a little resentful) of Megumi.

Mimiko & Nanako had a mix of emotions. They were anxious, thinking maybe it was their fault somehow. They were young, they were angry, and they were hurting on behalf of their beloved dad(s). They were in denial, you had made so many promises with each other already. They were tearful. They miss seeing you everyday. They miss your head pats. They miss your praises. They miss your comfort. They miss you. (They tag along with Megumi when he goes to visit you. The ache in Geto’s heart twofolds each time.)

Tsumiki was the oldest one out of the 4 and has divorced parents and separated co-parents. She knew the protocols and how to still maintain your relationship with each other, but it didn’t mean that she didn’t felt sadden by your departure and change in relationship dynamics.

(STSG tried using the kids as a reason to make you stay too. Nanami gave them the good ol’stink eye for this)

Gojo & Geto are still together, but they don’t entertain the idea of a third anymore. (They won’t admit it, but no one could ever take your place. And truth be told, they’re still holding out hopes for you to come back to them)

[drachenmagier]

Hi! Saw your post about commissioners using AI as a skeevy way to get cheap fully-rendered art from artists (thank you for spreading the info btw! Deeply concerning the ways these AI programs are being used to make an already difficult field of work even harder 🥲).

But it also got me thinking a bit about TOS's and pricing your work, particularly commercial work... I'm in the process of preparing to open up for commissions for the first time in years myself, and was wondering if you had any advice/resources for putting together a professional looking TOS and figuring out how to handle commercial licensing? I know this stuff tends to be super regional, but it's so hard to find consistent information online on the topics 😞

I can only tell you how I handle it. :) For normal commissions, do feel free to copy whichever part of my TOS you think will work for you from my private commission info. If you're not Swiss, the last line on the page won't be usable. 

A lot of doing art and illustration commissions is trial and error. I know it was for me. Tons of mistakes and hopefully not repeating them. 

For pricing, a friend told me two things that stuck with me and helped deciding on prices since then. 

First thing she told me is that exclusive rights for a simple caricature for a newspaper go for USD 800.- and up. Mind ya, she said that YEARS ago. And prices change. But if a simple black and white doodle goes for USD 800.-, don't sell exclusive rights to your full colour A4+ artwork for less. 

If in doubt, don't sell your exclusive rights at all. Most clients don't need them and if someone tells you they will give you USD 25.- and a voucher for -10% off their own product for it, tell them to fuck off.

People will try. And you will learn to say no. 

The second important pricing tip I got from said friend: decide on a price that makes it easy for you to let go. If you regret having sold it, the price was not high enough.

Most companies have their own contracts and their own price lists. It helps if you are able to adjust your work to their budget and deadline. 

Read the contracts carefully, don't skim anything, only sign them when you understand them. Especially US-contracts have a lot of complicated looking clauses in them, like the Indemnification clause. If they tell you that a clause is just there and you don't need to understand it, you can sign the contract as it is: run. 

Most clients won't actually need or even want exclusive rights, simple print licenses will be enough for them. A rough over-the-thumb minimum pay would be around CHF 200.- to 250.- per work day. 

I will add a third point here:

If you really want something to exist and be a part of it, then do it. Have fun. We mostly regret the things we never tried and never did. And if you only do things for the money and don't get paid, it leaves you with nothing (my thanks to Neil Gaiman and his commencement speech "Make Good Art").

Some of my most amazing commissions were orders from people who couldn't pay a lot, but were awesome individuals with fantastic ideas. And I don't regret a second of the work I put into those commissions. But THAT is your decision. And purely yours. Don't let people tell you what to be exited about. 

Maybe the thing you will be exited about is a kid that wants to pay you three shiny rocks for a drawing of their super hero princess cat wizard. 

And you will make it the fucking best super hero princess cat wizard for one of the rocks, because you don't want the kid to have no shiny rocks anymore~. <3 

[thewizardlywyrm]

I recently started watching Drak Pack and I am OBSESSED. I sincerely wish I’d had this show as a kid, monsters and Hanna-Barbera cartoons were my absolute jam growing up, and this show has been getting me through some really rough times.  I thought I would do something I normally don’t anymore, which is post the lineart while I wait for time to work on colouring! I’m in a really long work gauntlet currently and haven’t had enough time off to work on anything beyond a bit of doodling if and when I get breaks. I’m excited to have a bit of time off eventually to colour ( and finish the companion Dr. Dred drawing as well as a few other ideas rotating in my head for this show )!  I love these silly lads! Genuinely really love their designs and personalities, and wish there had been more episodes. I’d be wary of a reboot- this show absolutely must never be revived as anything gritty or grimdark; it needs to be campy, silly and all-ages-friendly or it would lose its heart. 

Anyway! Monster special interest, meet campy cartoons interest! It’s a match made in Transylvania!

[innerslumber]

So...I've started drawing again. It's rough as all hell but the last few months while sick with pneumonia, I was stuck on my couch a lot and trying to sleep upright. Most nights it was unsuccessful and my brain was too scrambled to read or write, so I'd doodle.

During my teenage and college years, I wrote and drew a fair bit. Went to a ton of anime conventions and haunted the artists alley. But then school, work, family, LIFE just kept coming at me and then 20+ years went by with no creative outlet.

It didn't help that I've had people in my life that constantly discouraged it. That writing and drawing was frivolous and a waste of time. And as the years went by, the harder it was to think I could do it again. It was just easier to tell myself I got more important things to do.

But by some weird happenstance, I fell back into fandom a few years ago and picked up writing again. Now, I am the first person to say that my writing isn't like...earth shatteringly good or anything of that caliber. But that wasn't the point. I just wanted to create again and have fun with my new friends. I write at a glacial pace but at the end of the day, it feels nice to do it again when the inspiration strikes.

Art feels...different. It's incredibly intimidating lol. I know SO MANY INCREDIBLE artists and I've watched them apply themselves for years and I just...I don't know lol. The imposter syndrome is wicked hard. I could never call myself an artist, especially after such a long hiatus.

But a friend recently reminded me that art can literally be a doodle on a post-it note. I don't have to compare myself to others and undermine myself, too scared to even start. And the other day, another friend said I never have to post anything if I don't want to. As long as I'm happy and having fun, that's the whole point.

Creating anything, by word or art, can be so hard. So time consuming. But I'm going to keep trying at both. Right now I'm still figuring things out, especially because I'm trying to make art digitally and I've only done that a few times.

Life is still incredibly busy and hard...and I've been conditioned for years that to enjoy myself was being selfish. Having my abusive husband scream at me that I was a "bad mom and a bad wife" for having a writing hobby and that my online friends and I were "trash" for writing about "men fucking each other" was really demoralizing. I'd wait until when everyone was asleep to write on my phone in the dark. But at the end, I still ended up deleting and leaving behind so much because of his vitriol.

But that isn't my reality anymore. If I have time, I can write when I want to. I can draw when I want to. I don't have to look over my shoulder that I'll get caught doing something that isn't anything to be punished over.

And my art is all over the place but that's okay! I'm experimenting and trying new things. There isn't any high stakes. And I can allow myself to just enjoy it. Maybe I might even post it lol!

[caelanglang]

"I've been very insecure about my work lately"

Nooooo! That's not allowed!

I'm kidding, but I just wanted to drop in and say that you're one of my favourite artists on here. Your style is so captivating, the colours are so pretty, and I especially love when you intersperse your art with text or poetry... you have a serious knack for artistic use of space. Every work of yours feels like there's a story to it, even if it's just a doodle.

Anyways, that's all! I know how rough these kinds of patches can be, and I know that just hearing other people like your art often isn't quite enough to overcome it, but I hope this at least helps you to get back to looking at your art and feeling happy with it again. There's no rush, so take your time. :)

aaaaaaa Story!!!! I've seen your lovely notes and kind words following me for a long time now and it just means so so much to me (ToT) sometimes when I post something here I would wonder if you've seen it, that's how much I've remembered you lol (wait I hope this doesn't pressure you or anything ><;;)

your sweet comments give me a lot of strength to keep going ;-; I sometimes remember your comments on my spacing and expressions and it makes me more aware of the decisions I make while drawing! I don't know how to say it properly but y'all's words are also pushing me and making me improve!! :D I really really really appreciate it !!

I was honestly debating if I should shut down all my accounts at some point and just. never post online anymore lol. BUT!! It's literally all you kind souls showering me with so much appreciation that keeps me here. And I hope that you know that :)) Thank you so much for your kind words aaaaaaaaa

Now I'm more eager to get my shizzles together and post something hhhhhhh

ps. spoiler. i am. working on another prose/art bsd piece so stay tuned!! >:)

[silvernmoonshipping-is-love]

PLEASE READ before commenting/following.

As you can see I used to have an AU based on the famous FnF mods of these two boys and doodled for it. I came to love this AU as I created it during a rough time and helped me cope ever so slightly and was interested in these creations and happy to explain and show. Yet I never posted them until now. How come?

You see, I didn't have good experience with the FnF fandom, especially related to these mods due to being an original Creepypasta fan and not the mods, which in turn caused me to feel unsafe and uncomfortable in the community.

Not long after I created this AU and hoped for more content for them, especially Lost Silver, I spiraled down the hateful and toxic side of it. To the point I wanted nothing to do with the fandom or the mods anymore, and had to scrapped my once beloved AU. It worsened my mood to the point of hiatuses and even almost growing distain for all I've created. I wasn't happy anymore, I wasn't having fun anymore, they almost made me feel  dislike towards my art, my writing, my ship, all that brought me joy. And even almost ruined my fave character and who used to be, and still kinda is, a huge comfort to me, Lost Silver himself. Obviously this probably sounds dramatic, and those weren't the only reasons for my anxieties or breaks, but it added a lot, I had to scrap or cancel a lot. And I think it's important to inform about.

Now don't get me wrong, I don't intent to gatekeep or say none of you can like the mods or have to know his original story to be valid. If it brings you joy instead, more power to you, we're all just fan trash in different ways.

I am aware that those people that made it so hard and no longer fun for me anymore, that made me feel like dump for way too long; even now I am nervous or doubting and no longer just happy about everything I have; I know they're surely just a a vocal minority of toxicity like every fandom, hell, I'm in the Creepypasta fandom, I know about such things too. But if this fandom made me feel more accepted, made me feel safer, then I can't return to the FnF community anymore. I can't face that anymore.

I wish to distance myself, I'm not a FnF account and never will be, I'm a Creepypasta account first and foremore. So to anyone finding this post, don't expect more, you will NOT find the content you want or are looking for.

However I'm posting these drawings, because despite everything and the bad memories or such, I still hold some place in my heart for them and the AU, but you will not get any info about it publicly anymore, these will be the one and only pieces to be shown. Plus I kinda wanna rub it into my paranoia's face over getting so worked up, lol.

Please be respectful and understand, don't ask for more content on these, don't follow for FnF content, I do not wish to interact with it anymore. And thank you to you all who stayed and supported anyways, even due to this drama and thus leading to my many breaks.

[the-rookinator-3000]

saw the post you made a couple hours ago about human penguin interpretations and i'm curious. how would you go about it? i've been thinking about doing some myself as well :-) (you don't have to make sketches or drawings or anything descriptions are just fine too)

(all the links lead to posts on tumblr!!!)

actually i have drawn human rookie and jpg! although they are basically just. chibi doodles thats mostly a rough outline

(and human lorna too but like shes outdated and ugly and i dont draw noses like that anymore)

BUT there are interpretations that artists have made that i also very much agree with

like this rookie one that i think about every single day of my entire life 24/7 and i am absolutely incredibly obsessed with! ALSO THIS POST TOO I KNOW ITS THE SAME ARTISIT BRUURBDNFIFNDNEKR UT BT FFKFKDHSN

and this gary! i dunno.. i just like old man gary.... hes balding :]

there are some aspects of these designs that ppl might not agree with, like rookie being a poc and gary being a . balding old man but honestly i love them!!! but i also rlly like other interpretations regardless of what i personally prefer !!!

ALSO A FUN FACT U PROBABLY ALREADY KNOW cuz im never gonna have this opportunity to ramble abt my fav human designs: jet pack guy is implied to be black!! its mostly a personal opinion by the club penguin team and definitely not "word of god" info but its a commonly shared one by the community and even some members of the club penguin team themselves!! yea!!! as you can see im very normal about human club penguin designs

[xx-1c1cl35-n-t34r5-xx]

Post detention comfort

Katsuki Bakugo x reader fluff

GEN! reader

TW: swearing, Bakugo being Bakugo, shouting, trash TV, Mina Aishido (brief appearance), heavy metal

There you sat, on the couch in the middle of the common room. You weren’t doing much, just doodling and practicing some sketches as something blasted from your earphones. You turned the music down a bit, not too much but just enough that you could lightly hear the scratches you made on the coarse paper.

You were alone in the dorms. Everyone else had gone out, either to hang out, go to a club or extra-studies. With the exception of two people; You were, as always, choosing to stay inside. You never liked going out all too much.

He however, was stuck in detention. He walked in, stomping over to the couch. He dropped his bag on the floor as he slumped next to you; taking a headphone out, you asked, “So… How was it?”

“Shit. Don’t fucking ask anymore questions,” He rashly spoke out, and before you even had a chance to open your mouth again, he was already angrily ranting, “They made me fuckin’ sit in silence. For basically three whole ass hours. Then I had to write an apology letter. AND THEN MR AIZAWA FUCKING CRITIQUED THE GOD DAMNED APOLOGY LETTER I DIDN’T EVEN WANNA FUCKING WRITE!” 

You giggle lightly, covering your mouth. He slumped back into his seat. He was sooo pissed over what, a 15 minute detention for being “too rough” in training. Granted, it was with you and you could’ve spoken out, but you knew with how Mr Aizawa knew of Katsuki’s reputation, he would’ve thought you were trying to just not get him to be pissed at you.

You gave Katsuki an earbud. He nodded along to the tune; one of the few things you bonded with in the beginning was your music taste, bands like Slipknot, Lorna shore, System of a down, Korn, even more emotional bands like pierce the veil. He leaned on your shoulder looking at what you were drawing - it wasn’t much, only a few hand and pose studies - and congratulated you. You gave him a small peck on the cheek and stood up, setting your drawing stuff down and walking into the kitchen. He followed you. It was funny sometimes, you would walk into another room and, without fail, he’d tail right behind you. He liked to give this tough and mean persona so much, but it was nice just how much he liked being around you. Sure it wasn’t much of a persona, that was actually him. But it was nice to see him let down his walls and spend time with you. It got upped to 10 when he had tough days like these, even the smallest thing could tick him off and you managed to calm him down, even getting sappy moments like thes-

“Are you wearing fucking lip gloss? MY WHOLE CHEEKS FUCKING SHINY AND STICKY YOU BITCH!” he cut your thought process. Of course he had to ruin the moment.

“You know what else makes your cheek shiny and sticky?” you remarked back, shit-eating grin staining your usually dead-eyed stare.

“No, NO. I’m not fucking JOKING here. How the ever living FUCK do I get this off?” He stressed as he walked up to you, and you grabbed a wet wipe and wiped his cheek with it. He muttered a small thanks and you smiled back. You grabbed some chips and sat back down, noticing he’d turned on a show on TV. Another funny thing about him? He LOVES trash TV, things like the kardashians, the bachelor, anything like that. And what he loved about watching them with you? You watched along with him, even jokingly (and sometimes genuinely) getting invested in the material. He stole a couple chips from you, and inched closer. By the time the episode was over, you two were so close that if someone were to walk in, they'd think you were one person.

You both debated whether or not to watch another episode, and came to the conclusion that the answer is almost always yes. It was peaceful. Just you two, the chips had long finished but none of you could bother to step away from each other's warmth to grab more. It was now long dark, winter was often like that. But with just the light illuminating the whole room, it felt like this was all that mattered. 

The next episode went automatically, as did the very much expected shriek from a familiar voice.

“OMG are you two watching the bachelor?? OHHH is this a date night??” Mina shrieked, then quickly coming in between both of you, lowering her voice so low it was practically only a breath, “We’re not interrupting anything, are we?”

Bakugo was quick to almost shout at her, but you interjected rapidly, “No, not at all Mina, feel free to join in! You’ve watched this episode already, I think. If you don’t mind that then feel free.”

You heard a short huff from Katsuki. Soon, almost the whole class had gathered together to watch. And with that many people, you felt it getting late. You snuck of, getting ready for bed and as you laid down, you texted Katsuki,

----------------------------------------------- today ---------------------------------------------------

You:

Imma head to beddy byes.

Gn

KatsuCurry:

kk

gn too.

OH SHIT ITS LIKE 10PM

Y TF DIDNT U TELL ME

YK MY SCHEDULE

You:

didnt notice lulz + skill issue + L + ratio

jkjk but rlly i didnt notice

anyways, good night <3

KatsuCurry:

ughh fine.

good night to you too

You:

YOU DIDNT GIVE ME A HEART BACK

do you not love me anymore? /j

:,(

KatsuCurry:

<3

there

happy? 

You:

yh 

gn! 

:) 

KatsuCurry:

:) 

You turned your phone off, putting it on charge. You grinned like you were mad, as your tired eyes fluttered shut and you sunk into the comfort of your bed.

[kateweathermachine2]

Days 29-31 of my snarky sarcastic side speaking quotes from my page-a-day calendar!!

The calendar is taking quotes from the @ unspirational Instagram account by Elan Gale.

Jan. 29:

“You should hear what Mondays say about YOU.”

Jan. 30:

“Yes, I’m late.

No, I don’t care.”

Jan. 31:

“Never trust a person who smiles the same in every picture.”

Decided to still post this on Sunday even though this was technically finished in the middle of the week. And man, what a rough week it has been. But it’ll get better next week (I hope).

As I mentioned in the last post, I’ve decided to make these daily doodles a solo January thing to better focus on school and all my other responsibilities. If a calendar doodle strikes my fancy in the future, I’ll likely make it and post it here, but they won’t be a regular weekly thing anymore. (Not to mention I’m running out of different general poses to use =^=)

This was fun though! I got to draw many snarky faces.

[aro-laurance-zvahl]

hey now, don't beat yourself up about "unfinished" work. sometimes the purpose of writing is to shake your emotions out, or to test a new style, or to write the one specific scene you've been daydreaming about. 500 words is still a lot (trust, I did nano and thinking "I still have 500 words.." is daunting). no love, however brief, is wasted.

for a prompt, you never said if you wanted it fandom specific? so I think it could be fun to try and write smth in second person. you could do it in a, outsiders perspective looking in to whatever fandom situation you want. also, don't feel pressured to post it. sometimes our writing is just for us (though of course if you want to, I'm not holding you back!) :]

It has been. A bit of a rough week. Which made these 500 words take longer than my usual, but they shall not be wasted. Since I first followed you back in your Sanders Sides days, I figured I might well cobble together something SaSi. It’s from this LAMP soulmate AU I have, inspired by a fic I read years ago but when I reread it it just didn’t scratch the itch. It’s a mess of an AU, so many branching paths and no consistent timeline and probably at least 10k words of mess scattered around my drafts and 1k of them are probably the same words pasted into different draft where the situation goes a different direction. I have fun with it though, and I really like it which felt appropriate for this ask as well.

So without further ado, enjoy 537 words of Remy’s inner turmoil.

—

You are fourteen years old, sitting with your best friend in his room. You’re pretending not to notice, but you can tell he’s looking at how the writing appears on your arm. You know he’s still mourning the fact his writing doesn’t appear on it anymore, and so are you.

Not that you don’t like your soulmate, he’s nice and his doodles are getting better, and you feel it in your bones you’ll love him when you see him, but you don’t think it’ll stop the weird grief you have about Virgil. He’s been your best friend since you were six, and for over two years he was your soulmate too. Until he wasn’t.

Looking back, maybe it was predictable. You two were kids, arms filled with possible soulmates that fate was still lining up perfectly. Nearly all of them would fade, and one day, for you, they did. You were left with one, like everyone figured would happen. You had already met your soulmate, you two would barely remember a day without that bond. Except the one wasn’t Virgil, and it could not have happened at a worse time.

You don’t think you could ever forgive fate for the shambles she left Virgil in, even if your soulmate is a god on earth. He lost so much that year because of stupid fate and you know he’s never been able to recover, so why should you love fate? You know she’s not kind, maybe she has been to you since that time but you’ve seen the cruel nature she harbors. You had to watch her break your best friend before either of you knew long division.

You take a deep breath. He just got back from the hospital, it’s not the time to go on one of your anger induced ramblings about fate. They make him sad anyway, and you’re supposed to be here to cheer him up. You try to focus back on the game in front of you, but your arm itches and you know it’s because fate is sinking her claws along the new markings, urging you to look and look and look.

You give in to her demands, sparing a quick glance down to relieve the hives like feeling dancing across your arm. It’s nothing important, just a few words asking you to remind him to ask for more stickers, you couldn’t even respond if you really needed to anyway. The itching fades as quickly as it began though, and you wonder how Virgil manages to never look at his own if you cave after moments? His soulmates are chatty too, from what you have gathered from the small things he says about them.

It’s most definitely not the time to ask though, so you once again adjust your grip on the controller in your hand and focus your vision back onto the game in front of you. It really sucks you have to finish the game for him, but he doesn’t want to wait the couple months for his cast to come off to see the end and you know he’d do it for you. You’ve been dying to talk about it with him anyway, and that is definitely a safe and happy subject.

[jungkxook]

—pour up. (m)

⟶ pairing: jungkook x reader x taehyung

⟶ genre: fuckboy!jungkook / fuckboy!taehyung + smut  

⟶ words: 14,048 (idk how it’s literally just smut)

⟶ rating: 18+

⟶ summary: sleeping with both notorious frat boys kim taehyung and jeon jungkook doesn’t sound so bad ━ especially when you’re drunk and faded.

⟶ warnings: mentions of drug/alcohol use, essentially pwp lol, threesome, double penetration, voyeurism, messy rough sex, multiple orgasms, overstimulation, dry humping, manhandling, doggy style, riding (sort of?), fingering, oral sex (f and m receiving), face riding, face fucking, deepthroating, breast play, slight begging (mostly oc making jungkook beg hehe), brief name calling, dirty talking, unprotected sex, creampie

⟶ note: this is a repost of a fic from my old blog! also shout out to miss jlin @bratkook​ for being the sweetest and for liking this trashy fic of mine, and a happy early birthday present to @onherwings​ miss juno, the resident taekook lover!! 💛

also the accompanying song to this fic is pour up by dean!

There were times when you were sober where you were persistent about never being in a five foot radius of a frat boy, much less strip yourself of your dignity long enough to sleep with one.

Your appalling disgust and immense irritation of the male species that were frat boys kept you well in tune to your rule ━ until you’re far past the point of drunk and faded. Only then, when your bloodstream is laced with alcohol and your mind is nothing but a hazy cloud of smoke, you shrink into a shameless hypocrite and favour the appeal of a simple hook up. But you have needs too; it isn’t entirely your fault. Kim Taehyung offers you exactly that, with the promise to then act as if nothing happens the very next day so that the two of you can revert to despising one another out in public.

You act as if no one knows about your flings with ultimate frat boy Taehyung almost every weekend, as if they’re just as oblivious as you, but damn near the whole school knows and most certainly the rest of the boys in Beta Tau Sigma, or as Taehyung puts it, his brothers. It’s a useless cycle of bicker, avoid, drink, sex, and repeat, ever since you joined the school as a freshman and the sophomore boy took an interest in you. He’s charming in all the right ways and good looking but his smooth appeal was almost too good to be true and, past his “kind” smiles, you could make him out to be arrogant, vain, and cocky. Maybe you would have given him an actual chance had it not been for his snarkiness but all your brain could truly handle was his dick for a few hours a week.

Unsurprisingly, you always end up crashing at Beta Tau Sigma after one of their raging parties that results in your hook ups with Taehyung; surprisingly, Taehyung is miraculously into pillow talk post-sex and so he doesn’t entirely mind if you stay the night. But, by morning, when the alcohol has all but turned into a terrible hangover, he can hardly care less if you stay or not.

Usually, you wake up on your own, courtesy of past sober you setting an alarm on your phone to make sure you wake up earlier than all the other walkers of shame and anyone else in Beta Tau Sigma. Ideally, it was to help guarantee that no one would ever see you or judge you for stooping low enough to sleep with a fuckboy but you don’t know how well that’s working out for you anymore, if you’re being honest.

That’s why, early one fateful Sunday morning after a night of fun with Taehyung, you awaken with a start to the shrill Marimba tone that rips through the silence of the room and causes you to literally jump out of bed and crash onto the floor. You groan at the sharp pain that shoots up your spine and accompanies your groggy mind as your eyes flicker open only to be greeted with a blinding light that is the sun as it filters through the shut curtains. Littered on the ground are clothes, your clothes, beer bottles, red solo cups, discarded bed sheets, a singular condom wrapper (you thank your past selves for at least being sober enough to remember to use one), and your cell phone.

“Turn that shit off, for fuck sakes,” he grovels.

His hangover, and the early morning, makes his already deep voice even rougher, huskier, and you blame your disoriented mind for thinking he sounds even remotely sexy. He doesn’t bother to lift his head from his pillow or to find where you are in the room, the messy longer-than-usual curls of his hair flopping into his lashes as he flips onto his back. Other bodily remnants remain from the night before, from the mellowing ache between your legs left in the wake of his dick sufficiently railing you to the bite marks on his neck that you had so graciously bestowed him.

Now, you roll your eyes at him instead but dive for your phone nearby and tap the snooze button before it wakes the entire house and rouses the army of fuckboys from the dead.

“Good morning to you too,” You remark. “Is that better, princess?”

“Much.”

You push yourself to your feet and stretch, the stiff joints in your body popping and cracking, before searching for your clothes. You’re certain Taehyung has fallen back asleep as you dig around through the clutter to find your belongings but what else is new? It’s a routine the two of you have come to know well, and one that neither of you mind. You spot some sort of lacy material hidden underneath a few of Taehyung’s dirty laundry laying on the floor and reach for it thinking it’s yours. You’re only mildly disturbed to find that it isn’t yours at all ━ though you’re more concerned about the hygienic purposes of touching some other girl’s thong than you are about the blatant fact Taehyung sleeps with more girls than just you (a fact you swear you could care less for).

“Jesus Christ, your room is a disaster,” You scoff now.

“You could clean it,” Taehyung suggests sluggishly. Now, he’s awake, pretty and hooded eyes fluttering open to find you nearby. He props his hand behind his head to lift his gaze a little higher.

You snort, tossing the underwear away. “You never cease to━”

“Amaze you?”

“Repel me more than when I see the collection of thongs you have hidden in your room,” You correct. Fortunately, you spot your own underwear nearby and scoop it up, quickly slipping into them.

“Aw, baby, is that a bit of jealousy I hear?” Taehyung asks. He runs a hand through his dishevelled dark locks and shoots you a drowsy smirk. “You know you’re my one and only. I can always count on you when I want good head.”

“Please, flatter me some more, Tae,” You quip dryly.

As you hastily slide into your stiff shirt and jeans next and turn to face him, combing your fingers through your hair, Taehyung seems to take your words to heart and tries again. “You look like shit.”

You feign a voluntarily loud and overly dramatic moan. “Ugh, you really do know how to treat a girl━” Your cut off by a shameless snort from Taehyung before you continue on, “You know, you don’t exactly look the hottest right now either.”

“I beg to differ,” he replies nonchalantly. Technically, he isn’t lying, but you refuse to feed his ego any more.

“As if.”

“Funny,” he hums. “Could’ve sworn last night you were calling me hot when you were begging for my dick.”

You don’t bother to reply. Instead, you shake your head as you rub your tired face, uttering, “I need a coffee.”

“You could stay,” he offers. “I can make you one.”

“You don’t even know how to boil water,” You retort. “But thanks for the gesture. Try not to throw up on yourself today, okay?”

Taehyung mumbles something in response but then he’s already flipping over onto his side to fall back asleep again. You grab your bag from the floor and slip into your shoes before tiptoeing out of the room.

The Beta house is just as much a disaster as Taehyung’s room is and you find yourself stepping over more bottles, cups, empty pizza boxes, and hungover passed out people with phallic images doodled on their faces. The sun filters into the ever grand mansion and only illuminates the chaos the frat boys put it through. Everyone is thankfully still asleep as you head downstairs but, as you sneak past the kitchen, you notice two figures rummaging about, boisterous unabashed laughter filling the house that somehow hasn’t woken the others yet.

Jeon Jungkook stands before you with Park Jimin, both fellow Beta brothers, though Jungkook is in the same year as you. They, like most other Beta boys (and especially Taehyung), are well known on campus but Jungkook is perhaps even worse than Taehyung. Now, he’s adorned in only low hanging gray sweatpants that show off the ripples of his toned chest and the happy trail that threatens for your eyes to follow it. He holds a bowl of cereal close to him with the same arm decorated on every inch with tattoos, a snapback pushing his messy hair up and away from his forehead. The best part (and you mean that not at all) ━ or the worst ━ is the fact that he stands on a hoverboard, as if walking is too much for him to handle at nine in the morning. Jimin isn’t far off wearing the same attire, only his look is paired with the fuckboy-essential-starter-pack of socks and Adidas slides, and he’s at least actually using his legs to walk.

“Morning,” Jungkook smirks. “Time for the walk of shame?”

You have to retain a sigh. “I’m surprised you’re up, Jeon. I was sure you were gone past the point of saving last night.”

“A couple of shots do nothing for me,” Jungkook replies, shovelling a spoonful of cereal into his mouth. “I was pretty much sober.”

At this, you sit back on your heels and look him once over skeptically. “You kept trying to hook up with me, called your dick Jungcock, threw up in one of the vases, and then passed out in the bathtub. I wouldn’t have exactly called you sober.”

The smirk remains on Jungkook’s face. If anything, he seems more so amused and it pisses you off. Jimin bursts into a fit of laughter and shakes his head.

“Always a pleasure seeing you, Y/N,” he greets. “Hey, are you coming to the party going down at Lambdas house after exams? It’s pretty exclusive but you and your friends are all invited by courtesy of us.”

“Ugh, I can’t even think about going to another party right now. How do you Beta whores do it?” You grovel. “Besides, why would we come if we know you’re going to be there?”

“‘Cause Tae’s going and you’re probably gonna wanna suck his dick,” Jungkook suggests snidely.

“I was gonna say the free booze,” Jimin offers instead. “Man, you know the Lambdas. They’re all rich pretentious sons of country club owners. They hardly throw parties but, when they do, you know it’s going to be wild. I wouldn’t miss it if I were you.”

“Well,” You say, “thanks for the invitation but we’ll see. Maybe if we have a pre-game where I can get drunk enough to handle your faces and the Lambda boys together.”

“I’ve always said you’re more fun when you’re drunk,” Jungkook hums pensively. Your eyes narrow into a glare and you’re fortunate Jimin is there to block your path from tackling Jungkook.

“Okay, whatever,” You grumble. “I’m out of here. I think if I stay here any longer, I’ll lose all my brain cells.”

Jimin chuckles but hardly seems bothered by your comment. He waves you off as he slips out of the kitchen to retreat into another room, leaving you alone with Jungkook.

“Can I get you anything before you go?” he asks. There’s a cheeky tone laced in his words that makes you blatantly aware he’s trying to suggest something more, like his dick.

“Absolutely not,” You wave him off. “See you around, Jungidiot.”

He grins and shoves another spoonful into his mouth. “Hey, maybe next Saturday you can think about blowing me instead of Tae, yeah?”

He’s met with you jamming your middle finger in his face and it only seems to entertain him further. As you march out of their home, slamming the door behind you, you have one discernable thought amongst your hangover and that is that you’ll definitely need to have that pre-game before you have the audacity to even see Jungkook, or any of the Beta boys for that matter, at the Lambdas.

That Saturday, you find yourself at the Lambdas house party.

So maybe you had sort of been lying when you said you weren’t so sure of going to it, but the thought was tempting enough and you aren’t one to pass up on a good party, especially when it’s after weeks of headaches and stressing over studying and exams.

Mid-terms come and go and when you finally finish writing your last paper, all you want to do is let loose and party and get dicked down by Taehyung. The Lambdas, despite their pretentious behaviour, looks to be very promising ━ but only after you down a few shots beforehand and have a beer while you’re getting ready. You’re not exactly as drunk or as tipsy as you would have prefered but it still gives you a nice enough buzz that makes you warm and lets the adrenaline pump in your veins and excites you even more for the party. The house you rent is off campus but it’s close to Beta’s and Taehyung offers to give you guys a lift to the Lambdas who are a fifteen minute walk away (but you know Taehyung will do anything to not walk anywhere his penny board can’t take him ━ and it’s not even Taehyung who is driving but his friend, Jin).

You can hear the party at Lambdas before you’re even there. The thump of bass coming from the house isn’t hard to miss, especially not with the way it seems to rattle the ground the closer you get. The house is crammed full to capacity and people have already begun to spill onto the lawn by the time you have arrived. A potent waft of alcohol and weed fill your senses and it is all you could really make out in the rambunctious party. You can hardly hear yourself think, let alone what others are saying to you. Yet, you still found a way to have fun almost instantly, drifting away from the guys to party with your friends.

Most of the night is a blur and a haze of confusion but you can remember drinking and drinking some more until you’re sufficiently smashed. You can’t quite recall where you had lost your friends, though you suspect it was after the intense game of beer pong you were suckered into in which you were certain there were no winners or losers as it was just an excuse to drink even more. It’s nearing 1 a.m. when you finally bump into a familiar face, pulling you back from the unruly party and the adrenaline rush coursing through your veins.

You’ve just slipped outside for some fresh air, perched on the front porch, when you notice Jimin is passed out on the lawn below. The other stragglers gathered outside barely take note of him but maybe that’s because he had chosen to faceplant in the shadows under the porch, tucked safely away from the rest of the party. Just before you can even think to walk over to him and make sure he’s still alive, the front door of the house swings wide open and a frenzied Taehyung bursts outside, shortly followed by an equally dumbfounded Jungkook.

“Where the fuck is he?” Taehyung hisses.

“I don’t know,” Jungkook sighs, disgruntled, “but leave it to him to run off and disappear.”

“Looking for someone?”

The two boys startle at your voice. They whirl around to find you taking a sip of the drink in your hand, as if only just noticing your presence. You hadn’t seen them since you parted ways a handful of hours ago in the party, though you’re fairly certain they’re just as smashed as you.

“Ah, babe!” Taehyung beams wolfishly. “What a pleasure seeing you out here. Uh, you wouldn’t happen to have seen where Jimin went, would you?”

You nod in the direction of the sleeping boy down below. “He’s there. He’s passed out cold, though. What the hell did you do to him?”

“Nothing,” Jungkook says. He grimaces as he hastily follows Taehyung down onto the lawn to stand near Jimin, and you in tow. “Jimin just likes to get out of hand. What should we do, Tae? We can’t just leave him here and Luna’s going to be pissed if she sees him like this.”

Taehyung stares down at Jimin miserably, thinking momentarily. “Well, Luna’s looking for him so we might as well drop him off at her dorm. He can deal with her when he’s sober.”

There’s a brief moment where you spot Jungkook seriously considering this though, as if leaving Jimin on the lawn of a frat house is a safer option than returning him to his girlfriend. Ultimately, he caves and you watch as Taehyung nudges Jimin awake (and by nudge, you mean he slaps the boy across the face) before pulling a very disoriented Jimin to his feet and slinging one of his arms over Taehyung’s neck.

“Fuck, he’s heavy,” Taehyung huffs. “Give me a hand, Jungkook.”

Jungkook nods, stepping forward to take Jimin’s other arm and hook it around his own neck. The two boys seem to be struggling carrying most of Jimin’s body weight, though they’re carrying mostly dead weight as Jimin continues to drift in and out of consciousness.

Before they can leave you offer to help though you don’t know what you can really do so you suspect your inebriated mind just wanted to go with them for the hell of it. Luna’s place isn’t far. It’s a ten minute walk from Lambda’s, but in that ten minutes, none of you talk about anything of real importance except for chuckle and laugh about things that happened at the party.

Eventually you make it to Luna’s, who answers the door angrily after you knock on it as if you’ve disrupted her slumber and frowns when she sees Jimin’s current state. At least she has the decency to thank the three of you. When she shuts the door behind her, the three of you turn to look at one another, almost clueless.

“So, what now?” Taehyung asks. “Head back to the party?”

The thought of making the ten minute walk back to the party in your drunken mind seems like an eternity. That, mixed with the way your feet scream in agony from the heels you’re wearing, you begin to pout and shake your head.

“I can’t walk anymore,” You whine, words drunkenly slurring together. “I’d be fine just sitting here.”

Jungkook’s nose scrunches as he looks at you once over. “How drunk are you?”

“I don’t know.”

“Well, how about we just go back to our place?” Taehyung asks. His arm slides around your waist then, tugging you close to his side. If one thing is for certain, the boy tends to get more handsy the more drunk he is, and you never seem to mind. “I’ve got a fresh bowl we can hit and we can drink there and just chill?”

You and Jungkook consider Taehyung’s offer fleetingly and, to you, it seems much more appealing.

“Sign me up,” You say. “The Lambdas were a bit too over the top for my liking. There’s only so much I can handle.”

Jungkook shrugs and nods in agreement. “Then I guess I’m going with you guys.”

The five minute walk to Beta is short and soon you’re inside the eerily empty house and climbing the steps to Taehyung’s room but not before the three of you raid their cabinets for any type of liquor. Eventually, you’re all lounging in Taehyung’s room, some type of music playing in the background as the three of you pass around a bottle of whisky and the bong Taehyung had promised he had, giggling at each other.

By 2 a.m., you are smashed and faded but blissfully so.

Taehyung and Jungkook are not too far off. It’s Taehyung who comes up with the idea to play strip poker, though with a twist. His version of the game includes: taking a shot anytime one of you loses a round along with either stripping an article of clothing or being allowed to pass it and get dared to do something else, though each person only has three passes.

Jungkook loses the first round, shedding only his jacket. Taehyung and you lose the second round; you decide to strip out of your own cardigan while Taehyung flicks off his hat. Jungkook and Taehyung lose the third round and both kick off their shoes. The game progresses slowly, with the three of you coming up with “clever” loopholes out of the rules, like stripping one sock one round and then another sock the next and all of you are too drunk to really protest. Eventually, the game winds up with Taehyung and Jungkook both in their pants and you still wearing both your shirt and jeans. Both the boys have used one of their passes and are still losing which, you will admit, boosts your confidence ever so slightly especially when you have such a nice view in front of you.

Both boys are toned, with certified gym rat Jungkook’s abs a bit more chiseled, and you know that sober you would cringe at how hard you seem to be drooling over them. Jungkook must notice because he shoots you a wink that has you squirming in your seat.

“Like what you see?” he asks.

“N-No,” You say shortly. “Shut up and go. It’s your turn.”

You end up losing that round, unfortunately, but you have no qualms with stripping out of your jeans and kicking them to the side. The next round, you lose again, except you decide to use one of your passes which has both boys groaning in defeat.

“Remember,” You coo, “play nice boys.”

The two exchange a look and you wait patiently, taking your shot of whisky in the meantime as Taehyung chides you on encouragingly with a cheeky, “Pour up, baby girl.”

You down the shot in one gulp, wincing as it burns down your throat, then chase it quickly with the drink you had stolen from their kitchen. A drowsy smirk tugs at Taehyung’s lips as he takes another rip from the bong, breathing out a cloud of smoke as he hums insouciantly, “I’ve got your dare.”

There’s a split moment where he makes eye contact with you and pushes his hair out of his eyes.

“Come here and kiss me.”

Had you been sober, you might have rolled your eyes at his simple yet assertive dare but, instead, you can’t help but snicker as you lean across to him from your seat on the floor and pull him down for a not so graceful kiss. His whisky coated tongue instantly collides with yours in an open mouthed frenzy that’s full of teeth clashing and wet sounds but it’s hot, too hot, even as Taehyung pulls you closer to him with his hand grasping at your chin. You instinctively react, teeth nipping at his lower lip as you suck hard, momentarily forgetting about Jungkook sitting in the room.

A moan emits from you as your fingers thread through his hair. Jungkook is left to watch but his eyes stay locked on your figure and the way you cave so easily to Taehyung, the way your mouth moves against his. He can’t seem to tear his eyes away from your position on your hands and knees, or the way you arch your back in an attempt to get closer to Taehyung, and he certainly can’t seem to look away from the tempting curve of your ass jutting in his direction. All Jungkook suddenly wants is for you to be kissing him the same way you’re kissing Taehyung.

You’re only interrupted when he finds the nerve to clear his throat after a few moments. “Nah, it’s alright, I’ll just sit here. Do you guys want me to leave?”

He’s being sarcastic, of course, and when you and Taehyung part to look at the boy, he’s scowling. The two of you chuckle lightly but don’t respond, though you remember the game you’re still playing. Taehyung kisses you one last time before you settle back onto the floor, a sheepish giggle bubbling in your chest. Taehyung loses the next round and he decides to strip down into his underwear though he hasn’t lost yet (the goal is nudity and neither of your drunk selves have enough dignity left to give up before then).

The round after that, you lose again. You decide, once more, to use another one of your passes and the two boys pause, thinking of a dare for you as you take a shot (which, you have realized, only get harder to take as time passes).

“I have one,” Taehyung says at long last.

“Bro,” Jungkook groans, “if you just wanna fuck, let me know. I’ll leave. I don’t think I can sit here and watch you dare her to suck your face again.”

Taehyung laughs and shakes his head. “Easy there. I was just gonna suggest that you━” he points at you before nodding toward Jungkook, “give him a lap dance.”

“A what?” Jungkook’s jaw drops open, his eyes widening. “M-Me?”

You glance up at Taehyung, quirking an eyebrow. “Him?”

Taehyung erupts into another fit of laughter but he’s the only one who finds the situation hilarious because you and Jungkook continue to sit there, dumbfounded. When Taehyung calms himself down, he wipes his eyes and shakes his head.

“Are you seriously telling me you haven’t been noticing?” he asks.

“Noticing what?”

“The way Jungkook keeps eye-fucking you,” Taehyung says simply.

Jungkook gaps. “The fuck? I haven’t.”

“Jungkook, you’re not exactly sly,” Taehyung says. “He’s been doing it the whole night, babe. It’s not the first time he’s done it, too. I just figured we could do him a little favour.”

Your turn to look up at Jungkook and purse your lips. He’s seated in Taehyung’s desk chair and has a frown painted on his face. It’s not like it comes as a surprise to you because he’s constantly trying to flirt with you even when you’re sober but his sudden flustered appearance puzzles you slightly. You’ll admit the idea is ludicrous, but Jungkook is undeniably hot, and grinding on his dick sounds more than wonderful to you in your current state. Either way, you stand to your feet.

“I’ll do it,” You say. “Why not?”

“Wh-What?” Jungkook yelps. “You will?”

“Yeah,” You flash him a pearly smirk. “What? Is confident Jungkookie finally shy?”

At the mention of the taunting nickname, he straightens up in his seat and scowls. “No. I’m just surprised you gave in so easily. You must really like me, huh?”

“Keep dreaming, Jeon,” You retort.

The music is still playing in the background as you slink towards Jungkook’s seated figure. Meanwhile, Taehyung is watching with an amused look on his face and sits back, clearly enjoying the view as he tells you that you have three minutes. As you approach Jungkook, he leans back in his seat and watches you with dark eyes. Jungkook’s eyes sweep over your figure, from the way you muse your hands through your messy hair, your tight tank top with one strap falling down your shoulder, your lacy and scantily clad underwear, and your smooth legs. He gulps at the sight and shifts in his seat.

As soon as you’re standing in front of him, you whirl around so that your back is to him and jutt your butt out just enough to catch his attention as you sway your hips to the music. Your hands ghost up your sides just faintly enough so that chills run down your spine and you lock eyes with Taehyung for a split second to see him grinning. You sit back on Jungkook’s lap and his breath hitches in his throat suddenly. He hates to admit how easily you’re driving him crazy and as soon as you are but he takes the time to enjoy the dance anyway, eyes staying trained on your ass as you grind against him in agonizingly slow circles and right against his dick nestled against his thigh. He can’t help it when a moan emits from him.

“Fucking hell,” he grunts, raking his hands through his hair. You snicker at his reaction, craning your neck to look behind at him.

“Enjoying yourself, Kookie?”

“N-No,” he rasps. This is a lie, of course. “Turn around.”

His command only humours you but you don’t disobey. You get up for a second to spin around and face him before climbing back onto his lap, swinging one leg over his. Before you drop your hips completely on him, you’re rocking them back and forth against the thin air, your hands snaking around his neck. His hands suddenly find purchase on your waist and he yanks you down onto him with a sudden neediness that surprises you, though you don’t complain. You continue to grind against his lap and you can’t help your greedy self when your hands reach out to run up and down his toned chest. He shivers at your slightest touch, his jaw clenched, but he keeps his gaze focused on your eyes, as if challenging you for more. Behind you, Taehyung is taking another hit from the bong and laughs lightly at Jungkook’s reactions.

“Let him touch you,” Taehyung says.

You expect Jungkook to listen to Taehyung and reach out to grab onto you but he hesitates, his hands remaining at your hips. So, instead, you take his hands in yours and begin pulling them up, sliding them along your midriff and up to your chest. You don’t even flinch as you let him cup your boobs over your clothes and you watch him slyly as he gulps.

“Is this the first time you’ve actually touched a girl, Jungkook?” You quip. “You’re gawking at my boobs like it is. Not gonna wet yourself, hm?”

“Fuck off,” he growls, though there’s no malice in his voice.

Instead, he focuses his attention on your breasts and the weight of them in his palm. They’re soft and supple and he squeezes them firmly, jiggles the flesh as he fondles at you blatantly. He hates to admit it but he feels as if he’s going to combust at any second, repressing the sudden urge to tear off your shirt and burrow his head in your chest, your boobs in his mouth. He doesn’t know whether the soft moan that slips from your parted pink lips is intentional to mess with him or because you had been getting carried away yourself. Either way, Jungkook’s certain it’s the hottest thing he’s heard in a while, the hottest thing he’s seen in a while, and he hates how his sudden erection forms, how embarrassing it must be. When you feel his hardened length start to poke at your thigh, you look down at him past your lashes and smirk.

“Are you hard already, Kookie?” You giggle.

Taehyung roars with laughter abruptly and the outburst only makes Jungkook redden.

“I━I━” he stammers helplessly.

You shake your head at him and then purposely press your hips a little more firmly against his, gripping at his shoulders now. You’re challenging him now too, and he doesn’t know what you have in mind but you’re wickedly set on making him cum in his pants before Taehyung stops you.

“Time’s up,” he says.

Jungkook almost groans out loud in frustration when you pull away and step off of his lap. He’s embarrassingly hard now but his drunk self doesn’t try very hard to hide it. Taehyung’s stare is settled on Jungkook as you walk back to your seat but, before you can even sit down, Taehyung is beckoning you over.

“Come here, babe,” he hums. You look at him curiously but move in his direction. “What do you say we help Jungkook with his problem, huh?”

“Help? How?” You question.

“Come sit,” Taehyung gestures to his thigh.

Jungkook watches with silent seething jealousy as you take a seat on Taehyung’s thigh and then he’s kissing you, pressing his lips against your neck. You react almost instantly, your head craning to allow him more access and your eyes clamp shut, your mouth hanging open in delight.

“Tae━” You mewl, tugging at his hair, as if to prompt him wordlessly about Jungkook’s presence. But when does it become too much? Every action seems to keep building and building, that you know where the night surely must be heading; that you crave it.

Taehyung’s tongue swirls at your neck, his lips sucking on the sensitive skin, before he peeks one eye open to look at Jungkook.

“Look at him,” Taehyung hums against you. “Look at how jealous he is right now. Look at how bad he wants to be me right now.”

You take a moment to register his words, your head spinning. You struggle to find Jungkook as Taehyung continues to ravish your neck. Jungkook’s stare is hard, his jaw clenched; his hands are balled into tight fists that let you see the bulging veins in his arms. Is he jealous? Angry?

Taehyung suddenly bites down onto your neck and you gasp in surprise, leaning against his chest. His nimble fingers find the hem of your shirt which he lifts and discards on the floor with ease. Next to come off is your bra. You don’t realize your torso is bare until a slight breeze hits your breasts and perks your nipples and Taehyung reaches up to cup the soft tissue in his large hands and Jungkook can’t look away because, fuck, touching you is all he really wants to do.

“Do you see him staring now?” Taehyung asks. “Do you see how desperate he is for you? Look at how bad he wants to touch you right now, baby girl. Will you let him?”

You’re still staring at Jungkook as Taehyung speaks and note how fast Jungkook’s demeanour has changed. He looks helpless, his erection more prominent in his straining jeans which he shamelessly palms at to feel some sort of relief.

“Better yet,” Taehyung hums, averting your attention back to him. He’s sliding one of his hands down your front and in between your legs, pushing your thighs apart. His digits come in contact with your clothed pussy and the sudden touch, light and feathery, makes you jump and gasp. You hadn’t been aware of how wet you had been until he touched you just then and the coil in your stomach only tightens with each passing second. “Will you let him play with you?”

It takes you a second to respond, though that isn’t because you’re struggling to decide. The thought entices you far more than you ever believed it could. Taehyung is suddenly rubbing his fingers against your clothed clit in so very slow circles that it suddenly has you tripping over your own thoughts. You’re biting hard onto your lower lip as you force yourself to nod hastily.

“Do you want him to?” Taehyung asks.

“Fuck, yes,” You whine. “Mmm, Tae━”

Taehyung shifts you in his lap so that your back is pressed against his chest, leaning all your weight against him. It’s hard to focus as one of his hands fondles one of your breasts while his other presses figure eights onto your clit. You’re on full display for Jungkook now, though his eyes fall to the wet spot that forms on your pretty little underwear as your arousal leaks from you.

“How badly do you want him to?” Taehyung asks.

“So badly,” You whimper.

This catches Jungkook’s attention and he leans forward in his seat. Taehyung smirks against you and then he’s moving, withdrawing his hand from between your thighs to hook around the waistband of your underwear. He gives it a quick tug and you fumble to lift your hips so he can pull the useless fabric down your legs. Once it pools at your feet, you kick it off to the side and then Taehyung’s hand returns between your thighs.

“Spread your legs,” he says.

You do as you’re told, pushing your thighs apart but then instinctively squeezing them shut when Taehyung continues to press his fingers against your clit. The sudden stimulation is too much for you and your face begins to heat up so Taehyung uses the chance to push your legs apart for you. He hitches one of your thighs over his own as if to anchor you in place and it works.

“Can you stay like that for me, baby?” Taehyung drawls. “Look at Jungkook for me.”

You nod, your throat dry as you lift your gaze to lock eyes once more with Jungkook. You find the boy gawking at your sex and you moan suddenly. His head snaps up to stare at you with a sudden blazing determination and lust in his eyes before they fall once more to your pussy, admiring the way it pulsates each time Taehyung swipes at your clit or tweaks at your nipples. But the best part? The best part is just how wet you are, your clear juices coating Taehyung’s fingers, spilling onto yours and Taehyung’s thighs with the passing seconds, and suddenly Jungkook is hungry for you. But what he doesn’t know is how you suddenly imagine Jungkook in Taehyung’s place, sat beneath you poised daintily on his lap, his fingers pressing against you.

You twist on top of Taehyung, your own hand reaching up to grasp at your other breast, pinching at the nipple tightly. A delighted moan fumbles from your lips. “Jungkook━ Fuck━”

“It’s nice, yeah?” Taehyung asks aloud to the other boy. “She’s pretty, hm?”

Jungkook nods eagerly and then groans. “She’s dripping. Fuck, it’s so hot.”

Your face burns at his words but you don’t have enough wits to think of a snarky retort like usual.

Taehyung chuckles. “Why don’t you come here then and touch her? Taste her? Is that okay, baby?”

When you realize Taehyung is asking you, you nod eagerly. “Shit, please━ Jungkook, wanna feel you━”

At your request, Jungkook practically tumbles out of his seat. As soon as he’s standing on his feet, the realization seems to hit him and he takes his time, walking to you slowly. His gaze sweeps over your exposed body and he licks his lips, his eyes suddenly darkening. Taehyung doesn’t stop touching you or marking your neck his even as Jungkook walks closer and it hits you in that moment what exactly you’re doing and who you’re with ━ and you fucking love it. Jungkook kneels down in front of you and Taehyung nods in encouragement.

“She’s impatient and feisty,” Taehyung informs. “But that makes her fun to tease.”

“I know how to pleasure a girl,” Jungkook quips.

“But you don’t know how to pleasure Y/N,” Taehyung replies. “You’re too cocky, Jungkookie, and she doesn’t like that. You need to take your time with her and you don’t do that often with girls, do you?”

Jungkook doesn’t respond but, judging by his face, you assume Taehyung is right.

“What do you want me to do?” Jungkook asks. He’s staring at your face now and only your face. His intense stare makes you squirm on Taehyung’s lap, and makes you suck your lower lip between your teeth.

“Touch me,” You rasp. “Touch me, please, Jungkook.”

God, how he loves hearing you moan his name. But the anticipation is killing you. You’ve felt Taehyung’s fingers plenty of time; you’ve never felt Jungkook’s, and the abrupt need seems to grow more intense with each passing second.

“You heard her, Jungkookie,” Taehyung says. He draws his hand away from your heat and kisses your neck softly. “Go on. Touch her. Be gentle, go slow.”

Jungkook is shaking with excitement ━ or maybe it’s just the weed and alcohol in his bloodstream ━ but he eyes you carefully, gnawing down on his lower lip. He reaches out at a tedious pace and hesitates, his fingers hovering over your core. Taehyung is watching with eager eyes whilst planting open mouthed kisses along your shoulders, neck, and jawline. Jungkook finally presses his fingers against your pussy and your reaction is immediate. You toss your head back against Taehyung’s shoulder and jutt your hips forward.

“Nnngh, fuck, Kook━” You whimper. “M-More━ Wanna feel more━”

Jungkook takes that as a good sign and follows after Taehyung, rubbing circles into your clit slowly. He feels just how wet you are, his fingers coating with your cum as they move with ease past your folds, and it’s enough to let the wave of glee wash over him again.

“See? Look how much she loves it already,” Taehyung says. “Keep going.”

Jungkook doesn’t need to be told twice. As he rubs his fingers over your clit, his other hand comes up in a greedy fashion. He can’t stop himself from slipping a finger past your folds and it takes all you can not to moan out loud but you give up on the prospect of remaining quiet when it feels so good to have both boys on you.

“Let him know how you feel, baby,” Taehyung purs. “How he’s making you feel.”

You struggle to find your voice momentarily, too caught up with the lust and desire but then a cry of delight falls from your lips. “Fuck, ah, Jungkook! That feels s-so good━”

Jungkook’s head snaps up to look at you in pure disbelief.

“Holy shit, that’s so fucking hot,” he huffs. “I never thought you’d moan my name and now you’re so wet and tight and for me━”

“And me,” Taehyung admonishes offhandedly.

Jungkook doesn’t reply but that’s mostly because he’s suddenly fixated on curling his finger inside of you and watching your every reaction. Your hips jut forward and you cry out, panting at the blissful feeling but it isn’t enough. You need more, and you need more now. As if Taehyung can read your mind, he chimes in again, disrupting yours and Jungkook’s reverie.

“Why don’t you have a taste of her?” he asks. “You won’t regret it.”

Jungkook’s eyes light up and he watches as you nod eagerly, desperate pleas coming from your mouth. Jungkook lowers himself down between your thighs and you wait with bated breath before he’s licking a clean stripe against your folds with his flattened tongue. The sudden slippery warmth has your body writhing in pleasure.

“Jungkook━” You cry out. “Oh my god━”

Jungkook grins. Then he’s licking at you again, tasting your sweet succulence, and groans into your hot core.

“Shit,” Jungkook huffs. “You taste amazing.”

He nibbles down slightly on your clit without warning and tugs. You instantly jerk into his mouth, a strangled moan ripping from your throat that sounds something like a scold of his name and a desperate plea for more. “Jungkook!”

Taehyung snickers against your neck and you can feel Jungkook’s lips curl into a taunting smirk between your thighs. Jungkook’s finger still curls deep within you as his tongue returns to lapping at your clit and you can feel his nose brushing against you the deeper he burrows into you. Meanwhile, Taehyung is continuing to ravish your neck, his hands tweaking at your nipples. The onslaught of senses is so much for you that you nearly scream when Jungkook’s tongue dips into your heat so suddenly to accompany his finger. He laps at you hungrily and you gasp, your breath stuttering as your hands come down to tug hard in his raven locks, your hips bucking forward and into his mouth. It feels fantastic, too incredible for you to put into words, as you feel the wetness of his tongue lap at your walls and suddenly you’re aware of just how susceptible you are to both of the boys near you.

“Fuck, don’t stop, Jungkook,” You moan.

“Now who’s the needy one?” Jungkook coos against your cunt. “Gonna cum on my tongue?”

“P-Please━ Want it so badly, Kook━”

He smacks his lips against you, taking as much as he can of you into his mouth and sucking hard until all you hear are the lewd wet sounds of his tongue and finger working miracles against you. You’re clutching his hair so tight, pushing him closer into your heat but he doesn’t relent. One of his hands comes up to hold onto your waist, to push you firmly back onto Taehyung’s lap and closer into Jungkook’s mouth. You can feel Taehyung’s budding erection poking against your thigh and it’s enough to make you flustered once more.

In an attempt to help Taehyung, you find yourself grinding not only into Jungkook’s mouth but onto Taehyung’s lap, earning a growl into your neck. Taehyung’s free hand comes up to your chin which he grabs roughly. He forces you to look at him and then he’s smashing his lips onto yours in a heated fashion for an entirely ungraceful kiss. It’s needy and hot, completely open mouthed as your tongues mingle in the air and as Taehyung sucks on your lower lip. Yet you tear your gaze from Taehyung to look down at Jungkook as he buries himself further into your pussy, his nose nuzzling against your clit. You’re dripping by now and you can see your own juices smear onto his lips, dribble down to his chin, and it’s the hottest thing you could ever imagine seeing. He doesn’t seem to care as it spills down his neck and suddenly the mere sight has you squirming again. You part from Taehyung’s mouth with a wet pop that rings in your ears and moan.

“Fuck━ nghn, I━I━ think I’m close,” You whimper.

“Fuuck, yes,” Jungkook growls against you.

“Let it go, baby,” Taehyung hums, nibbling at your ear. “Cum for him, for us.”

Jungkook’s pace quickens, pumping his finger faster in you and sucking at your clit until you have no more strength to hold off. Your hands fumble in his hair, trying desperately to pull him closer, and you hate how badly you want your sweet release already. It doesn’t help when Taehyung twists your body ever so slightly so that he can lean down to your breasts and catch one of your nipples between his teeth. His tongue swishes back and forth against the perked bud and you whimper again, the coil in your stomach tightening and loosening.

You’re so close now and Jungkook can hear it, can feel it, can taste it. You don’t have much longer after that before your orgasm is hitting you hard.

“I’m gonna━” You reach out to grasp at Jungkook’s hair, tugging at the roots. “Fuck, Jungkook━”

You cry out suddenly, the coil in your stomach springing apart. Jungkook moans into your pussy as you cum, pulsating around his tongue and finger and dripping into his mouth. You’re reduced to nothing but a whimpering, writhing mess against Taehyung as you buck back and forth into Jungkook’s mouth to ride out your high. Taehyung pulls apart from you to rub circles into your hips and the seemingly gentle move somehow soothes the intense wave of pleasure into something much sweeter. Fire burns at your core and flicks outward until your whole body is warm and numb and then you collapse against Taehyung’s chest, panting hard. Jungkook drinks up every last bit of you and you begin to cringe at the oversensitivity before you gain some of your wits again. You push his head away hastily and this time he relents.

“Did all your little happy wet dreams finally come true, Jeon?” You snicker languidly.

The boy sits back on his knees and looks up at you, locking gazes with yours. You can finally see his face, his tousled black hair, his swollen red lips, and chin, all of which are covered in your perfect sheen. He licks at his lips and wipes at his chin and neck where his tongue can’t reach and he does all of this without breaking eye contact with you. A small smirk forms on his face and suddenly you’re filled with an intense need for payback.

“Yeah, you act confident now but you seemed to enjoy it when you were riding my face,” Jungkook says. You roll your eyes, about to reply before he adds, “So, you’re welcome.”

“You’re impossible,” You huff, pushing yourself off of Taehyung’s lap.

“Where do you think you’re going, baby?” Taehyung mewls behind you. “We still need you.”

“Oh, I know,” You quip. You reach down to grab onto Jungkook’s chin, forcing him to look up at you. “But it’s my turn, don’t you think, Tae?”

Taehyung chuckles and nods in agreement. Jungkook, however, hardly looks bothered, though he seems a little taken aback by your sudden assertiveness when you begin pulling him up to his feet before pushing him back onto the bed. Taehyung scoots over so that the three of you can fit comfortably on his bed and then you’re moving, crawling over to Jungkook on your hands and knees.

“Are you trying to intimidate me?” Jungkook asks. “Because this is sexier than it is scary.”

You’re hovering over his crotch when he speaks, your greedy hands reaching forward to brush against his hard dick straining in his jeans. He nearly jolts in his seat at the sudden touch and you and Taehyung giggle again.

“Mmm, baby, teach him a lesson,” Taehyung hums. “Suck him off nice and slow but don’t let him cum.”

“Not unless he begs for it,” You say wickedly.

Taehyung stifles a chuckle. “I told you she’s feisty, Jungkookie.”

The younger boy is eyeing you carefully as you busy yourself by undoing the belt buckle on his jeans. He acts unimpressed, unfazed, as you unbutton his jeans and began sliding them off his legs, but you can see the needy and impatient glint in his eyes. Your eyes fall immediately to the ever present straining bulge in his boxers and you gulp in response, licking your lips. You can’t help yourself when you reach out to brush your fingers faintly along his length. He jolts in his seat and grits his teeth, shooting you a hard glare.

“Are you seriously going to tease me?” Jungkook grumbles. “We can skip all of that, y’know━”

“It’s payback, Jeon,” You hum, running your fingers down his dick and then back up again. “Where’s the fun in it if I skip all of the teasing?”

“You know,” Taehyung murmurs from beside you. He’s reclining back, watching you with intense eyes and is completely shameless about his prominent erection contained by his boxers. “I’m surprised the idiot hasn’t referred to his dick yet as Jungcock.”

You giggle, an all too innocent and sweet sound for the way you’re palming at Jungkook’s dick. Jungkook, who is apparently having a rather difficult time keeping up with his surroundings while your fingers continue to work against him, scoffs. His eyebrows knit together as he throws a beady glare at the older boy.

“You’re ruining the mood,” he grunts.

Taehyung clicks his tongue against his teeth, a smirk tugging at his luscious lips. “Of course. I digress.”

You turn your attention back to Jungkook who’s staring down at your hand with parted lips and a crease in his brows. Without warning, you grasp him through his boxers and he groans suddenly, bucking forward. The desperation of his situation only seems to increase in severity when you peel back the elastic band of his boxers and slide them off his legs, finally freeing his dick which springs out from it’s confines. He’s much bigger than you expected, his tip angry and red, leaking with pearly beads that dribble down his length and the bulging veins that line it.

“You’re staring again,” Jungkook hums when he notices you pause, your eyes wide. “Sure you don’t like what you see?”

You shake yourself from your daze and frown. “Shut up.”

The boy starts to chuckle at your flustered expression but yelps when you clasp your fingers around the base of his cock. A beautiful moan falls from his lips and excites you even more. You start pumping him slowly, guiding your hands up and down his length in careful and measured motions, wiping your thumb across his tip each time you reach it. Jungkook shudders in your touch, his teeth coming down to gnaw hard on his lower lip. His eyes are glued to your hands working against him, his face scrunching up in pure euphoria.

“Mmm, fuck,” he grunts, his head lolling back. “Stop teasing me and go faster.”

You don’t listen. If anything, you slow your pace and it has him so frustrated that he lets an involuntary whimper escape him. He bucks into your clenched hand, practically begging for more but remains quiet, safe for his heavy panting.

“You heard her, Kook,” Taehyung says. “Beg for her.”

“There’s no way I’m begging,” Jungkook hisses through gritted teeth. “Never. I never have and never will.”

“Bullshit,” You scoff. You fondle at his balls with your other hand and he moans again. Your hand comes to a complete halt all of a sudden, interrupting Jungkook as he is about to speak. Before he can protest, you lean down and lick at his tip, swirling your tongue around him once to taste his saltiness. His hips rut forward into you but you pull back almost immediately and find Jungkook gaping. You meet his desperate eyes for a steady gaze. “Beg. Just once, Jungkookie.”

Jungkook’s stare wavers as you run your fingers along his tip, squeezing slightly. He tries to compose himself, to remain calm, but when you are relentless, he caves very easily. He only gives in when you kiss the base of his cock. And those eyes ━ fuck, the way your eyes turn so wide and already look so fucked out. How could he resist you?

“Fuck, fuck, okay,” he gasps. “I need more, baby, please. Ah, please━ You feel so fucking good.”

His needy pleas satisfy you and your lips curl into a devious grin. You lower yourself on him suddenly, licking a clean stripe up his length and he moans loudly. You enclose your mouth around his tip and suck, earning a small growl from him as he pushes his hips forward for more. In the next second, you sink your mouth down his length, taking as much of him as you can.

“Fuck!” he moans abruptly. “Ahh, shit, that feels amazing, baby.”

You hollow out your cheeks as you pull your head up and then back down, starting at an even pace that has him moaning and writhing beneath you. He feels much bigger in your mouth but you don’t mind even when he bucks himself into you unexpectedly and hits the back of your throat. The action makes you gag around him and, in return, he curses at the way it feels.

“K-Keep doing that,” he mumbles. “Please, fuck, just like that.”

His fingers thread in your hair and he pulls you down greedily on him but you don’t refuse.

“Can you do it, baby girl?” Taehyung questions. His hand finds his way on your back where he rubs gentle circles into your skin. “Can you take all of him in your mouth?”

You nod carefully around Jungkook’s hardened length.

“Good girl,” Taehyung smirks. “Go slow.”

You follow his orders, sinking gradually onto Jungkook until you feel the tip of him hitting the back of your throat. You gag once more but, instead of pulling back, you shut your eyes and take a few deep breaths in through your nose. In, out, in, out, and then you swallow. Jungkook’s reaction is sudden and intense. He bucks into your mouth unwillingly and moans even louder, his fingers clutching at your roots.

“That’s it, baby,” Taehyung hums and his sudden presence is comforting.

“A-Again,” Jungkook stammers. “Again, please━ holy shit, you feel amazing.”

You swallow again and then a third and each time you can feel yourself sinking lower onto him. Tears prickle at your eyes as your nose is suddenly pressed against his lower abdomen but his reactions are well worth it and so you continue.

“You’re doing so well, baby,” Taehyung says, planting a chaste kiss against your shoulder. “You deserve some more attention, hm?”

His fingers slowly rub circles down your back, his lips following your arch and has you shivering beneath him, before stopping at the dip just above your ass. He’s kneeling behind you now, his fingers massaging into your thighs. You sigh against Jungkook when you feel Taehyung’s fingers continue their trek to your ass, rubbing you carefully. You, in response, push your hips back, waiting for more.

“You’re still so wet, baby,” Taehyung says. “I bet you’d come with one touch of my finger.”

With Jungkook buried hilt deep inside your mouth, you’re hardly prepared for when Taehyung slips his fingers underneath to your folds. It’s embarrassing to admit how right he is. You react instantly, moaning around Jungkook and jutting your hips back for more. The simple vibration has Jungkook groaning, his hips bucking forward. You hadn’t even been aware of just how wet you are before Taehyung pointed it out but then you can feel it, pulsing out of you and dripping down the top of your inner thighs.

“But you need more, don’t you?” Taehyung asks. “How about my cock? Will you let me fuck you, baby girl?”

You nod eagerly, the simple question exciting you even more. Taehyung chuckles and leans down to press a kiss to the arch of your back.

“But you’ll have to be good and keep pleasuring Jungkook too, okay?” Taehyung says.

You hum in response and swallow around Jungkook as if to tell both boys that you have no plans on stopping. Jungkook twitches inside you and scrunches his eyes shut.

“Fuck, Taehyung,” he grumbles. “Hurry up. Any time you touch her, she swallows. It feels so good.”

Taehyung snickers but he takes his time. He runs his fingers up and down your folds until you’re moaning needily against Jungkook. You look over your shoulder to see Taehyung’s fingers wrapped around his own hardened and pulsating erection, pumping himself a few times as he stares at you carefully. He positions himself behind you and takes the chance to run his tip and length along your folds. You whimper suddenly, hoping your desperate noises will spur him on.

“You want more, baby?” Taehyung asks.

You hum again, your voice muffled and hoarse.

“Okay,” he sighs. “Only because you’ve been so good.”

You have no time to brace yourself from the sudden impact of feelings. He doesn’t do much except for push himself into you, past your folds. It’s only just the tip and yet your heart jolts in your chest, the coil in your stomach tightens. It feels so good to finally have something of larger girth in you that you gap, simultaneously sinking down further onto Jungkook. The two boys grunt above you, both of them panting hard.

“You feel so good, baby,” Taehyung mumbles. “Fuck, you’re so wet.”

He leans down to press a kiss against your shoulder, his other hand coming up to rest on the dip of your lower back to guide you. He slowly, so very slowly, pushes himself into you, inch by inch, so you can feel the way he stretches you open, feel the way he buries into you. Your leaking arousal only proves to be of an advantage, letting him easily push into you without any trouble. Your fingers grip the bed sheets beneath you in an ironclad grip and you squeak when he’s finally buried hilt deep within you. You nearly gag around Jungkook again, who’s still panting and writhing above you, but the way Taehyung’s tongue marks patterns into your shoulder comforts you. You whine against Jungkook, pushing your hips back for more and the simplicity of your action has Taehyung’s breath hitching in his throat.

“So warm,” he grunts and then sighs against your back. “You always feel so amazing.”

He still hasn’t moved and you’re beginning to grow impatient, distraught over the feeling of him rock hard inside you but unmoving. You debate pulling apart from Jungkook to yell at Taehyung but you assume he can understand your haste judging by the way your body writhes beneath him, your fingers clench into fists. He pulls out in one languid movement, his breath stuttering, until only his tip is left before he pushes himself back in, equally as slow. He sets at a steady, easy pace that, at the very least, lets you grasp onto some sensible thoughts and pushes you to keep pleasing Jungkook. Jungkook can’t take it anymore; he starts rutting his hips up into your mouth with gritted teeth. It’s a hot, erotic mess of mingled moans and groans but you never want it to stop ━ in fact, you want more.

“You like that, baby?” Taehyung grunts.

You nod hurriedly, humming in response.

“Ah, fuck━” Taehyung groans. “Want it harder?”

You nod once more, this time eagerly. When Taehyung pulls back one more time, he slams himself back into you without any warning and you jerk forward, sinking down onto Jungkook. The younger boy moans, his head lolling back as his fingers twisting in your hair. You don’t expect Taehyung to do the same thing again, pull out slowly and then push himself back in with more force, but he does, and he repeats the action again and again until he abandons it for a whole new pace. Soon, he’s thrusting into you hard and fast but always making sure his hips reconnect with yours before pulling out so you can feel him practically in your throat.

“Like being fucked like this?” Taehyung asks. “You like being used like a little slut?”

His thrusts are relentless suddenly, jerking your body and back and forth until he’s fucking you in a way that has you sucking off Jungkook just right so that you hardly have to put in any effort. Although his hard thrusts feel amazing, each time you’re pushed forward, you sink further down onto Jungkook unwillingly and that, paired with the way Jungkook frantically fucks himself into your mouth, you nearly gag each time as he hits the back of your throat, drool pooling at your lips and dribbling down your chin. Tears prick at your eyes from the feeling and it’s too pleasing to quit, to pull away from Jungkook just yet. Jungkook’s staring down at you when he notices your scrunched up face. You’re surprised when his hand finds your cheek, his thumb brushing reassuringly into your cheekbone.

“You’re doing so━ ah, fuck━ so well, baby,” he rasps.

You can taste the saltiness of precum on the tip of your tongue and you wonder how close he is. You have no qualms in finishing him off then and there but soon the pleasure you’re receiving from Taehyung becomes too much. Soon, he’s hitting you at an angle that shakes something in you. You pull apart from Jungkook with a loud pop, saliva and cum coating his length and your lips, and a gasp wretches from your throat.

“Fuck!” You cry hoarsely. “Ah, T-Taehyung!”

You’re too weak to push yourself up and end up burying your head in Jungkook’s lower abdomen, feeling the heat consume you. You’re near numb, senseless, as you let Taehyung ravish your body, fuck you hard into the mattress and Jungkook. It’s a frantic build up, an intense wave of emotions that you seem to pass through, and you can hardly bring yourself to react. All you can hear is the sound of moaning and skin against skin and the heat seems to make its way up to your head, making you warm and fuzzy. Jungkook gently pulls at your face, lifting you up and bringing you to him so that he can smash his lips onto yours and all you can taste is bitter liquor, you, and him, but that doesn’t stop him from sucking on your lower lip even when you pull apart to moan and gasp.

“T-Tae,” You sob. “Fuck, Tae, I━I’m c━close━”

“Cum for me, baby girl,” he murmurs. “Let me hear you.”

You shake your head frantically at the sensitive sting between your legs still raw from your orgasm from Jungkook, shutting your eyes. Taehyung’s hands find their way onto your hips and he pulls you down his length until you’re balls deep and pauses. He lifts your hips and you can feel him twitch inside you that it even makes your own thighs tremble and shake. You’re sure you’ll collapse on him if he doesn’t hold onto you and he must realize this too because he grips your hips tight to continue thrusting into you. Soon you’re tumbling towards your high. Taehyung’s pumps are frantic, growing sloppy with each passing second, as he pushes you to yours and his high. The coil snaps in your stomach again and you’re in a moment of freefall where you’re stunned by the wave of pleasure. Then, Taehyung is bringing you back down to reality with his hard thrusts, the way he moans, and the lewd wet sounds of him pumping himself into you.

“Ah, T-Tae━” You whimper. “So good, fuck━”

His name falls from your lips in a repeated mantra. You crumble beneath him, collapsing entirely against Jungkook, who’s brushing your hair away from your face. You’re shaking with each touch, your walls pulsing around Taehyung and clenching hard. He moans and curses behind you and you know he must be close to his high because he, too, is fumbling for it. His thrusts are even more hasty and soon he’s reaching his climax. His moans increase in volume and his thrusts become sloppier until he finally pulls his cock from your walls and nearly collapses against your back.

With his hand clenched tightly around his shaft, he jerks himself off until he’s releasing onto your back in white hot spurts. He’s panting hard, sweat coating his forehead, but he takes the time to press chaste kisses along your back and shoulders as the two of you attempt to calm your shrill hearts. It’s silent in the room for a moment despite your panting breaths. Taehyung takes a moment to grab his discarded shirt and wipe at the mess he’s made before he collapses next to you at long last with a huff of air. You moan wearily, rolling off of Jungkook to lay on your back between the two.

“God, you’re amazing,” Taehyung sighs.

You giggle up at the boy and lean towards him to kiss. His fingers rake in your hair and a few silent seconds pass before you’re nearly back to an even breathing pace. That’s when you notice Jungkook, his hand gripped tightly around his still painfully hard dick.

“Jungkook,” You pur his name, catching his attention. “What are you doing?”

“What does it look like?” he quips.

“It’s your turn,” Taehyung points out. Jungkook glances at Taehyung and then down at you, quirking an eyebrow.

“W-Well, I just thought━” Jungkook stammers. “I just thought you’ve had enough. It’s okay, you don’t have to.”

“I call bullshit again,” You scoff.

“Baby girl,” Taehyung hums, “do you want Jungkookie to fuck you?”

You nod eagerly but Jungkook doesn’t seem too convinced, or maybe he’s hesitant. Taehyung’s eyeing him closely, curiously, before he gaps. He bursts out into a fit of chuckles, earning both yours and Jungkook’s attention.

“Shit, of course,” Taehyung grins. “He’s probably gonna let go the minute he’s in you. You’re close, hm?”

“Only because she’s already been down on me,” Jungkook grumbles.

“You know that’s not it,” Taehyung replies. “You’ve been wanting this forever.”

Jungkook’s eyes suddenly darken as he glares at the older boy. “Taehyung.”

“Wait, what?” You ask, turning to gawk at both.

“Jungkook has a little crush on you,” Taehyung smirks. “This is all he’s ever wanted. I bet he’ll bust a nut the second he fucks you and he’s embarrassed.”

You gasp as you turn to face Jungkook who looks entirely disgruntled but you’re more shocked about the fact that Jungkook likes you than anything else. Jungkook, notoriously arrogant fuckboy, who’s seemingly made it his mission to give you a headache every waking moment by trying to flirt with you. And maybe you’ve always sort of known it; maybe you’ve always sort of felt the same.

“That’s not true!” Jungkook protests. “I━I━ Well, Tae hardly finishes when he’s with another girl. He’s jacked off to the thought of you before, too━”

Taehyung starts. “Fuck off━”

You’re stuck between the bickering boys, staring up at both of them with a dumbfounded expression. Before either boy can strangle the other, you’re speaking up and interrupting them.

“I don’t mind,” You say. “I’m just… surprised.”

Both boys are silent now, aggravated probably, and you giggle. You reach up to rake your fingers in Taehyung’s hair and then look up at Jungkook, using your other hand to grab onto his chin once more and force him to face you.

“Come here, you idiot,” You drawl. “I want you to fuck me. Wanna feel your dick.”

Jungkook seems taken aback but then his eyes are sweeping down your body and he writhes in his seat. Before he can protest, you’re pulling him down onto you to kiss. It’s passionate and rough but hot altogether as your lips smack against one anothers. Jungkook’s desperate situation seems to hit him again, especially when you snake one of your hands down to his length and wrap your fingers around him to jerk him off. He pulls apart from you, gulping.

“Fuck, okay, okay,” he gasps. “I need to be in you right now, please.”

You and Taehyung smirk as Jungkook shifts around on the bed to kneel between your legs. He pauses, glancing up at you once more and noting the way you bite your lower lip seductively, before finally pushing himself in. He goes slow, but not as gradual as Taehyung. You can still feel him stretching you open and he groans. He seems to slide the rest of the way in with a lewd squelch sound because of just how wet you are and then he’s buried balls deep, fitting so snug within you.

“Holy shit,” he whines. “You weren’t kidding, Tae. She feels amazing.”

Taehyung hums in agreement. “What does she feel like? Let her know, Kookie.”

Jungkook squeezes his eyes shut momentarily to focus. “Wet,” he hisses through gritted teeth. “Warm, tight ━ fuck, so tight.”

He marvels at the feeling, wonders how you can still clench so tightly around him despite being stretched wide by Taehyung. He bows his head to rest in the crook of your neck and moans. His words are enough to spur on your own reaction and you whimper against him.

“Oh, fuck, Jungkook━”

The sensitivity you feel in your core met with his hard cock makes you cringe but simultaneously pleases you and you’re bucking your hips for more. He groans at the feeling, his hands flying down to grip your hips. He’s big, stretching you wide, but you feel anything but pain except for the sharp burning sensation as the intensity of your past orgasms start to hit you. He rolls his hips back and then thrusts into you so hard that you yelp and jerk back on the bed.

“Go easy on her, Jungkook,” Taehyung admonishes. “She’s not a doll.”

“I’m sorry,” Jungkook sighs, nipping at your throat. “You just feel so good, Y/N.”

“I’m okay,” You reassure. You feel his length twitch within you and your head lolls back. “Fuck, I feel more than okay.”

“Can we try something?” Taehyung asks.

He receives two weak nods in response. Jungkook pauses, shifts the two of you until he’s on his back and you’re straddling his hips, his dick never once slipping from your core. The older boy grabs onto you and yanks you onto his hips.

“What do you say we give Y/N the pleasure she deserves?” he asks. He pushes his length past your folds and is rewarded by the sound of your moans as your jaw unhinges. “Think you can handle both of us, baby?”

“Fuck, yes,” You gasp.

Jungkook seems just as enticed by this. He’s careful as he pushes his cock into you and your reaction is explosive. With Taehyung already stretching you wide, you wonder how Jungkook will fit but it’s snug and perfect. You can feel him stretching you further, inch by glorious inch, and he hasn’t even begun moving when your walls clench around the two of them. Taehyung hisses in your ear and Jungkook pauses at once, sputtering for air, giving you time to adjust. When Jungkook pushes himself further into your cunt, rubbing against Taehyung’s cock and your own walls, you can’t help the delicious moan that falls from your lips.

“Oh my god,” You whimper. “Fuck, fuck, that feels so fucking good━”

It’s such a sticky, hot mess, and all you can hear is the sound of guttural moans and grunts. You jut your hips forward, a silent plea for something more. Jungkook’s hand grasps at your ass and then he’s pulling out. He growls suddenly, thrusting his hips forward and the sensation suddenly overwhelms you. As he picks up a pace that leaves you breathless, Taehyung slowly thrusts into you and the pleasure becomes too much. Your hands reach out to grab at anything, fingers digging eagerly into Jungkook’s chest, Taehyung’s sides.

“Oh, fuck,” Jungkook grunts. His face is scrunched in pleasure and concentration, his mouth hanging open.

“You’re doing so well, baby,” Taehyung growls. “You like being stretched wide like this, huh? Such a good girl too. Fuck━”

He’s sweating, but so are you, and all you can hear is the sound of yours and the boys’ moans, the vulgar wet slap with each thrust Jungkook makes. It’s only amplified with each small leisurely thrust Taehyung makes into your throbbing pussy, his dick rubbing against Jungkook’s with each thrust. Your walls tighten around Jungkook and Taehyung as the seconds pass and you know you’re already close to your third orgasm of the night but you try to hold off despite the room spinning. All you can do is lay there for Jungkook to ravish and control, for Taehyung to enjoy, too caught up in the moment. Your breasts bounce wildly with each thrust Jungkook makes and his gaze seems fixated on your chest before flickering down to watch himself disappear inside you each time. Taehyung is raking his fingers through your hair, soothing you through your next climax and it’s close.

“Fuck,” Jungkook hisses, panting hard. “I’m not gonna last.”

You push your hips forward as if to probe him on and he growls.

“No, shit, let me enjoy this, baby,” he whines. “Ah, so tight━”

He’s grumbling to himself, cursing under his breath and you smirk tiredly. Jungkook leans his head down to kiss at your chest, catching one of your nipples in his warm mouth. His tongue swishes back and forth over the perked bud and your chest arches into his face. Your fingers are clutching tight at his hair even as he obeys and adds more force with each thrust, slowly picking up his pace. His mouth widens and he sinks lower on your breast, humming against you in pleasure. Taehyung’s own pace quickens. It’s not as relentless as Jungkook’s but he makes sure to help aid you to your high, ramming his hips into yours until both their cocks slip into a seamless pattern. All you can focus on is the crude wetness, the way their dicks threaten to slip from your hold at how sloppy and wrecked your cunt becomes.

“Ah, yes,” You hiss. “Fuck, yes, yes━ So good, oh my god━ Right there━”

Your voice is cut off by a loud moan. You feel the familiar wave hit you once more and this time you hardly have any strength to fight it off or welcome it.

“I can’t━” You wail suddenly. “Fuck, I can’t━ I’m gonna cum━”

You’re fumbling for words to warn him that you’re close before you’re cuming around them. Their names wrench from your throat in no discernible pattern, accompanied by vulgar curses. Your body writhes between the two boys, your chest arching into his mouth, your legs tightening around Jungkook’s waist.

“You’re doing so well, baby,” Jungkook coos. “Come on, wanna feel you cream all over us━”

Stars form behind your eyelids and explode into galaxies as they swirl down your spine and to the tip of your toes, making them and your fingers curl in delight. Your vision grows blurry and tears stream down your face at the build up of pressure finally being released for the third time and you can’t help it when your mantra turns into delighted sobs and whimpers. You’re clenched so tight that Jungkook feels as if he hardly has any space to move and the confinement of his length has him gasping. He pulls apart from your breast to watch your scrunched up face with hooded eyes. He moans again, and desperately leans down to suck at your jawline.

You’re too spent to keep up with him or Taehyung as he helps you further to your high but you know Jungkook is close when his thrusts become messy, quick spurts. You gasp each time he thrusts up into you until he’s finally cuming.

“Shit,” he hisses. “Gonna cum━ Gonna let us fill you up, baby?”

“Please, please, wanna feel it,” You mewl.

He slams his hips into yours and stills for a moment as he releases into you in one hot wave and emits a beautiful moan of your name. You’re panting hard even as he rides out both your highs with a few more incredibly sloppy pumps before he finally collapses against your chest. The two of you are struggling to catch your breaths, your heart beating in your ears.

The room is silent, blissful, and it takes you a few moments of basking in it before you’ve regained your breath. Your fingers rake in Jungkook’s soft and sweaty hair and you hum in content. His mouth presses a few open mouthed and hot kisses along your neck and jawline before connecting with your own mouth. This time, the kiss is chaste and you smile against his lips before he’s pulling out of you. You moan at the missing feeling of his warmth and the way his own cum leaks from your core, down Taehyung’s cock, and your own thighs.

But Taehyung isn’t done. He thrusts up into you to ride out his own high, pushing Jungkook’s release back into you. His pace is steady, deep, and all you can both do is moan and gasp for air.

“Fuck, Tae,” You rasp tiredly. “Cum for me, baby.”

The boy gasps for air, nearly fumbling behind you to reach his high. “Gonna make this pussy mine. Fuuck━”

When Taehyung finally reaches his own high, it’s in another sticky stream of hot cum, each fluid mingling with the other in a pitiful mess. He pulls his slackened length from you and you whimper at sudden the loss, core and legs aching. As you slide onto the bed between the two tired and breathless boys, Jungkook wipes at your glistening core with a shirt and you sigh in content.

“Why haven’t we done that before?” You gasp, earning a chuckle from both. Jungkook lets out a boisterous laugh and you flick his arm. “If you say anything dumb, we’re never having a round two.”

“Round two?” he asks, wriggling his brows. “You want this to happen again?”

You nod, though you can already start to feel yourself succumb to sleep as it creeps upon you. “What do you think, Tae?”

“I think,” The older boy hums, “that’s your best idea yet.”

Jungkook seems surprised, excited even, and you smile sleepily. Taehyung throws his arm over your waist and pulls your back to his chest, wrapping you in his arms as he slips off to sleep. 

Before you fall asleep that night, you snake your arm up Jungkook’s chest and let your hand rest against his beating heart which you can still feel beating shrilly even long after your messy night together.

You awake to the familiar sound of your alarm.

It’s loud, annoying, and jolts you awake only to toss you into a haze of muddled confusion and an incredibly terrible hangover. Your head throbs and your body aches. Sunlight splashes in from the closed blinds and illuminates your face, making you squint.

“Turn that off, Jesus Christ, Y/N,” Taehyung snaps, his voice muffled and aggravated.

Your mind is too groggy to realize he’s sleeping next to you, too groggy to suddenly remember what happened the night before. Until, of course, you feel your limbs tangled with not only Taehyung’s but another’s. When you crane your neck to look, you see Jeon Jungkook splayed out beside you sleeping peacefully and you gasp.

The events of the night before suddenly flood your mind and everything is hazy up until your wild time with the two boys. Your muddled sober mind alerts your heart and suddenly it’s beating hard and fast in your chest as you register the situation. You’re used to waking up with a naked Taehyung by your side but never were you used to waking up next to a naked Taehyung and Jungkook.

Jungkook stirs in his sleep then and you curse silently, diving for your phone on the floor before realizing your drastic mistake. Your core is still tender and your legs feel so delicate, nearly caving in beneath you as you wobble precariously. Somehow, you manage to grab your phone and tap the snooze button hastily. Taehyung’s still half asleep on his side but Jungkook lays on his back and you’re surprised to see him looking up at you with a quirked eyebrow and a tiny smirk.

“Don’t you dare say anything,” You hiss. “Holy shit, that wasn’t a dream?”

You gnaw on your lower lip and reach down blindly to grab the nearest article of clothing on the floor (one of Taehyung’s shirts) to toss over your bare body. To soothe your aching muscles, you resort to kneeling on the edge of the bed.

“It wasn’t,” Taehyung murmurs.

“Nice to know you think our dicks are dream worthy though,” Jungkook snorts. “So when’s our round two?”

Your promise from the night before dawns on you all too suddenly and, though you feign your usual annoyance for both boys, the potential prospect of another night with the two of them thrills you to no end.  

“I━ I━” You stammer.

“Come back here, baby,” Taehyung muses. “It’s too early to be up right now. You can sleep a bit longer before you pretend you hate the both of us.”

Your eyes flicker down to your phone to check the time: 6 a.m. You can barely walk, let alone function this early in the morning, even without the added stress of your hangover, and sleep seems far too appealing to ignore. Maybe you can stay for a few more hours…

“Fine,” You grumble. You crawl back between them and wiggle around until you’re laying back on the bed. “But you’re making me that cup of coffee when I wake up, Taehyung.”

“Anything else, princess?” Taehyung grins.

“Maybe run me a bath too,” You wince as you settle back against the bed. “Everything hurts.”

“Will do,” Jungkook says. “Gotta do the most to make sure we get that second round. Now, come here━”

The boys snicker and, soon, the three of you have slipped back into a peaceful slumber.

You know that when you wake you’ll profusely deny that the night before and the morning after had ever happened; that you’ll never again find yourself in either Jungkook’s or Taehyung’s bed, much less with the both of them at the same time ━ but you find that you never really listen much to rules anyway.

⟶ All rights reserved to © jungkxook. I do not allow reposting, translating, or any sort of modifying and reuploading of my work.

⟶ Feedback is always appreciated!

[dethberri]

just a sketch dump

so about 3 years ago, i met this wonderfully kind minat/o rper, whose muse was so endearing that they’d left an impression on me ( and ichigo, truth be told ) and left me wanting ichigo to become bffs with nardo uwu  this also engendered a genuine curiosity that i never acted on solely bc i’m a stubborn little fucker who prefers sticking to what he knows best ( b/leach ), that is until very recently..,,.,. and now it seems i’ve spiraled into nar/uto hell these past few weeks omg

( peter if u are reading this, hi ilu, and thank for you for inadvertently ruining me 3 yrs later slkjsf  you and nep/@tattebaios​ have ruined me, thANKs )

anYWAY, it’s probably weird of me to post fanart from a diff fandom here but hey, my blog + one of my sketches includes my boy so… whatever lol  this goes in order of my first tentative sketch of nar/uto while on the phone to my most recent atrocity  fingerguns

too much kubo influence.,.,,. also idk how to... draw young faces cries

nobody comment on the lack of clothing—i add clothing last okay

i rlly liked this one bc it felt like i was getting the hang of him, but then i lost the data and had to resort to a backup,.,. now it doesn’t look the same anymore so i’ve given up on this one smh 😔

that third rough sketch has now become a massive canvas that’s nowhere near done.  it’s gonna take time i don’t have to finish it.  maybe one day idk

ive binged the movies save for two, and so far, blood priso/n is my favorite, right next to lost towe/r ( almost entirely bc minat/o’s in it tbh ), and despite everyone and their mothers telling me to watch road to ninj/a, i refuse to watch it until i'm emotionally prepared bc:

[9:50 PM] solo: if i watch road to ninj/a, ill cry won't i BC MINATOOOOOO [2:53 AM] boop .: 100%

[3:56 PM] solo: im too scared to watch that one bc ill prob cry like a bitch [4:02 PM] GreenJacket: LJSJDJSJAUD [4:03 PM] solo: MINATOOOOOOOO

also, quick doodle of this dork before bed yesterday

i imagine he’d be a really fucking cool breakdancer and nobody can tell me otherwise; this is canon now bye

[corpsentry]

january: an art retrospective

i did some stuff last month (but it’s a lot of stuff and there’s a photodump + some Serious Fucking Reflection, so it’s all below the cut)

so ok, let’s start with this. here are some heads. each head has a red arrow. that red arrow is what i call the red line of the devil. it’s the slope of the face from the side of the eye to the cheekbone and then down towards the chin. up until like 2 weeks ago, i couldn’t draw it. i couldn’t fucking draw it. i would edit over that part of the face over and over again until i was frustrated and tired and i had a raging homosexual headache and it still never looked right. notice that each head is different. notice that each head looks wrong.

at the start of 2021 i finally admitted to myself, as per the image above, that i was deeply, deeply unhappy with my art. what was the problem? i dunno. but i decided i was going to fix it and i was going to do so via another one scribble a day event wherein for every day of january i would find a photo of a human head, and i would draw it.

january 1st, 2021. i was embarrassed to tweet this even on my private account where like 5 friends and a rock would see it. in retrospect, you can also see all of my bad habits emerging like dicks from a hole in the ground. it’s disproportionate. the brows look flat. the eyes are slanting upwards. the entire drawing looks flat, like this isn’t a 3d person but a caricature of one.

january 2nd, 3rd, 4th:

on the 2nd i decided to start a separate thread for doodles and applied learning. here’s the first set of tests

the rest of the week is kind of uneventful so we’re going to skip those. fast forward to january 11th

this one is especially bad. i am acutely aware, suddenly, that i am not changing anything at all. i’m stressed and miserable about it because i’m still trying to see people as people and trying to draw people that look attractive and proportionate and hot. my friend, leny, reminds me that i need to think about faces in terms of planes. i have a moment. my other friend masha sends me some links to anatomy tutorials. i have another moment.

january 11th. applied sketch

january 13th is when i start the troubleshooting process. the link above drives me mad because i’m pretty happy with the face but then i realize that there’s something very fucking wrong with the shape of the head LOL and then i realize that i’ve never had any idea what the proportion of the face to the rest of the skull is so i grit my teeth and i open a new canvas and i

bald studies. it seemed like the right thing to do. can’t draw heads? ok draw some heads. look at some photographs. i traced each photo but tried to stick to straight lines so that i could replicate the shapes more easily. i broke each face down into shapes. i thought about airplanes

i got really excited. i started doing studies, then applied studies, then stylized studies.

sketches. i’m not sure what’s going on (as always) and it’s very rough, but they look different from the sketches i did on january 2nd. that’s a start

january 16th’s daily study. looks more like a person now. juuuuuust a bit

more applied studies

on the 18th i take a break and go stare at some lips because i don’t understand how the fuck they work. again, i focus on shapes, on volume, on the fact that these things exist in 3d. holy fuck lips exist in 3d. holy fuck we are real

january 19th. i’m working on it.

january 22nd. some sketches + a daily study. it has finally occurred to me that heads can tilt up and down and that things look different accordingly. yes i was not aware of this before. yes i have been drawing for over a decade.

january 23rd. by this point after doing my daily sketch i almost always go back and do an applied study which is basically to say i drew a lot of fucking links. this one looks kind of okay. i’m kind of proud

january 25th. links. trying to make sense of everything i’ve learned

26th, 27th, 28th. daily studies

january 1st. january 31st

The End Of The Photo Dump (dab)

ok NOW i get to talk about what i discovered while studying the shit out of human beings

FIRST OF ALL, there is something precious and magical about drawing shit without the explicit knowledge that you’re going to tweet that shit out to 45 people later. it takes the burden of perception off your shoulders and that does something to you, or at least that’s my theory. i told myself i wouldn’t post any of this stuff until the end of the month (if i wanted to post it at all) and kept everything off my public social media accounts and that meant i could draw ugly as hell without worrying about who would point and laugh, which i absolutely fucking did. a lot of these are fucking trainwrecks. most of these are fucking trainwrecks. why do they look like that?? why??? this doesn’t look like the work of someone who’s allegedly been drawing since they were in kindergarten, does it?????

here’s why: because that person took a huge motherfucking swing at everything they’d ever known about art and spent a month building something new in its place. the abstract explanation is that i grew up on shoujo and weird old anime and my understanding of anatomy was unironically kamichama karin and while i love kamichama karin, when kamichama karin is your rule even if you try to break it, you’re going to end up going nowhere. “you have to know the rules to break them”, yeah? well i didn’t know shit. the abstract explanation is i’ve been miserable about my art for a few years now because i saw other people doing things effortlessly which i couldn’t and instead of going back to the basics, i tried to do what they did (not plagiarism, mind you, i mean i literally tried to copy the red line of the devil i mentioned above because i couldn’t even make that happen) and then i fucking failed.

the simple explanation is this. i had to unlearn everything, and relearn it again (like some kind of new renaissance clown, what the fuck is this?)

take this for example. all my life i’ve drawn faces in the order: eyes, nose, mouth, face shape, head. this works for some people, im aware, but it was something central to how i had always drawn, so i decentralized it. i said fuck you to the old me and changed the order up. now i start with the nose, then the eyes, mouth, the chin line, and the sides of the face. now i force myself to think about the human head as a series of parts interacting with each other instead of a bunch of disparate features which i want to look pretty.

or let’s use this zelda from last year. something about this looked wrong last october, the way something about all of my drawings looked wrong, but i couldn’t pinpoint it for hell the way i couldn’t articulate Any of my feelings about the visual arts. now, looking back, here’s what i see. that nose is sticking out far too much given how she’s not really facing very far away from the camera. that ear at the back shouldn’t be there. her forehead is too big. she doesn’t have a forehead. what the fuck is up with the shape of her head?

so apparently reject modernity embrace tradition has its roots in alt-right terminology and i’m not very horny for the alt-right (you understand), but the spirit survives here. you know sometimes you have to admit that you have no idea what the fuck you’re doing and draw people for 31 days. i’ve spent my whole life drawing stylized people and while again there are artists who have no issue with this, i veered off the track of the Good and the Holy and couldn’t get back on. i had no point of reference because i’d never thought about what an actual human being looks like, so i had no way to fix what i knew in my gut looked wrong but wouldn’t come out better.

this was hard. this was like oikawa tooru swallowing his worthless pride and admitting that ushijima wakatoshi had gotten the best of him for the last time in his high school career, but in haikyuu!! by furudate haruichi oikawa tooru fucks off to argentina and then joins the argentinean national team, and you know what, i think i’ve made it to argentina (not the team just the country). as per the golden rule of dont fucking move until you’re at least two thirds of the way through the month, i only started trying to draw Shit shit on like the 22nd or something, but i was happy with that i created. i am happy with what i’ve done. i’ve posted like 2 things this month that involve people with what i now call ~applied Knowledge~~ and they’re, like, not perfect obviously (perfection is an unattainable ideal), but i’m fucking proud of them. i didn’t spend 5 hours hunched over my laptop adjusting the red line of the devil because it’s not a devil’s line anymore. because i finally sorta get how people work. because i sat down and i said ‘we are not going to fuck with this misery shit anymore’ and then i did that. it’s just a line now.

here are 2 collages tracking my painstakingly carved out progress from january 2nd to february 2nd because i’m a slut for collages

and here’s what i’ve done to my art! the same person drew these but also Not Really! you know! for the first time in a year i don’t immediately hate what i’ve drawn. you know what guys? art is fucking fun. zelda’s forehead doesn’t scare me anymore because i know how foreheads fucking work now, and i don’t know everything, and i’m going to keep troubleshooting stuff as i go (i want to draw a skeleton. like a. i want to draw a goddamn skeleton guys) but i’m honestly and genuinely proud of what i’ve done in the span of a month, and i’m also in disbelief. i started this month-long challenge out as a last ditch effort to make peace with my art because i’ve been tired for a long time and i was ready to kick the bucket on drawing people altogether. i didn’t think anything would happen. nothing’s happened for years. i’ve been miserable for years.

this was the caption for january 1st, 2021. i was super, super fucking embarrassed and it looks like super fucking shit, but you know what, i think i did in fact triumph over the bullshit. surprisingly enough, when you put in consistent effort into something, You Will See Results. didn’t see that coming, did you? i know i didn’t.

this isn’t a success story. it’s a happiness story. i never gave a shit damn about the institute of art or whatever, i was just mad at myself because what i saw in my head didn’t match up with what was on the canvas. and now it’s getting better. now i’m calibrating the compass. now drawing not just backgrounds but also people is exciting to me, and i can stick my links in your face and tell you ‘they hot’. i’m going to keep doing that. i’m going to keep going until i drop off the side of the earth and then spiral towards mars like some kind of fairy, and then i’m going to create something beautiful.

thanks for reading. here’s a pr department link for sticking around until the end

[i-dnt-know-either]

Thinkin bout DinCobb soulmate AUs like:

That one AU where you don’t see color until you make eye contact with your soulmate. Except it has to be direct eye contact, so looking through the visor of a helmet doesn’t count. It’s one of the reasons the Children of the Watch are so adamant about the helmets at all time thing—a soulmate is a weakness, something an enemy can exploit. And so we have Din and Cobb, unknowing soulmates because Din is stuck behind his visor. And then Din wanders back to the marshal after giving Grogu to Luke, lost and just on the edge of broken, and he takes his helmet off because what does it matter anymore and suddenly he realizes that Cobb’s scarf is red and oh no he’s crying again. And Cobb wraps his arms around him and holds him as he falls apart, too busy worrying and caring for this broken man to admire the world around him. It’s only an hour later, when the tears have stopped, that Cobb lets himself think about colors and all he can think about is brown curls and brown eyes and how none of the other colors even matter. And Din is doing the same, deciding that red is his favorite color because it’s Cobb’s color.

Or the one where you have your soulmate’s name tattooed on you somewhere. And Cobb’s been waiting his whole life to meet whoever Din Djarin is, whereas Din is terrified he’ll meet Cobb Vanth at the end of a blaster or see his name first on a bounty puck before he ever hears the person introduce themselves. So when they meet, and Cobb does introduce himself—wrapped in armor that’s not his, maybe-not-quite an enemy—Din isn’t sure what to do. And Din spends the rest of his time with the marshal panicking over what to do. By the time they defeat the krayt dragon, the armor has been properly returned and Cobb is most definitely an ally-maybe-friend, and Din has to make a split second decision on if he’s going to reveal his name—because he has to leave, has to complete his mission, but damn if the marshal doesn’t make him want to stay. And Cobb deserves to know—deserves to know his soulmate is more or less a living suit of beskar, doomed to roam the stars forever. So he tells him, prepares himself for the worst, and is surprised when Cobb just smiles and tells him he’d better plan on staying at least the night then because Cobb’s not about to let him go that easily, not when he just got him. (Putting the rest under a cut cause this post got long)

Or the one where anything you write on your skin shows up on your soulmate. Cobb takes up a habit of always carrying a marker with him—markers last the longest on his skin—and he’ll write down his thoughts throughout the day, tell his soulmate about Mos Pelgo, sometimes he’ll make little doodles if he’s bored. He writes jokes and stories, hoping his soulmate reads them. His skin is bare—he had one single sentence show up in his entire life. “My name is Din Djarin.” Nothing else, and Cobb wonders and wonders. And then the Mandalorian walks into his town, and Cobb takes his marker that night and tells his soulmate about shiny beskar and adorable green children. The next morning Mando acts funny, keeps staring at him when he thinks he’s not looking. It isn’t until a day after they defeat the krayt dragon—and Cobb takes the time to tell that story in detail, taking up the skin on both of his thighs and one of his arms—that words appear, dark ink rippling across his left forearm. “I hope our paths cross again.” Cobb smiles so wide his cheeks hurt. Din becomes a bit more interactive at that point—not much, but he’ll let Cobb know he and the child are safe, where they are, what they’re doing. The sentences are usually short and to the point, but Cobb cherishes every one. He keeps Din up to date on Mos Pelgo, the townspeople, the Tuskens. Wishes him “good night” and “stay safe” every night before he goes to bed, tells him “good morning” and “good luck” when he wakes up. Sometimes he’ll just write Din’s name on his arm, a secret between the two of them, and it sends a thrill through him when his own name appears mirrored on his other arm. And then the messages stop. And Cobb’s terrified, weeks go by until finally a message appears, the handwriting shaky. “We’re safe. Kid is with his people. Can I come home?” And Cobb tells him yes, of course. An unfamiliar ship appears in Mos Pelgo soon after, touches down just long enough for one person to disembark, still beskar wrapped but helmet tucked under his arm. And Cobb opens his arms and welcomes him home.

Or the one where any wounds you take—bruises, scratches, scars—appear on your soulmate. And Din would feel sorry for his soulmate—he’s been through a lot, during training and then as an adult—if he didn’t have so many bruises and cuts and scars from his soulmate too. He can’t help but wonder who they are, what they’re like to have just as many injuries as he does. It isn’t until the star-shaped scar appears and someone tells him what that probably means that he understands. And he feels anger and sorrow and a whole mess of emotions that he can’t do anything about because he doesn’t even know who or where his soulmate is—only that they’re a slave. So Din takes that rage and bottles it up, pushes harder into his training so that if he ever does meet his soulmate he can protect them, free them. By the time he meets Cobb, a lot of the rage has gone out, time and stress wearing down on him. He’s not really thinking about his soulmate when he offers to treat the marshal’s injuries after the fight with the krayt dragon—the marshal had offered the same to him, so it was only fair. They’re back in Mos Pelgo that night, in the marshal’s home, and Cobb has to remove his shirt so Din can get to some nasty bruising around his ribs. And there’s that star-shaped scar, right where Din’s is, and Din isn’t even thinking when he reaches out to touch it. Cobb whips around, anger flaring up in him, and Din scrambles to explain. Cobb doesn’t believe him until Din takes his armor and shirt off and shows the marshal the identical mark on his back. And Cobb is silent, unsteady, and so Din pulls him close and apologizes for all the scars he left on Cobb’s body over the years—there’s a lot, he knows. And Cobb apologizes too, because he’s never been able to back down from a fight, and it’s been a rough life. And they spend hours into the night telling the stories of their scars, tracing over them like roadmaps of their lives.