#i only clown in my private circus thanks

[myosotisa]

sometimes you see someone with a headcanon that is the complete opposite of yours and you think "wow imagine having the worst take of all time" and then you keep scrolling

in this strategy, we acknowledge 2 things:

you're allowed to be a little bit of a dramatic bitch if you wanna

#1 is only allowed if you keep that shit to yourself and/or privately discussed with a treasured friend

[conchcronch]

Little Rabbit

Sir Crocodile x You

It’s been weeks since he’s paid you an ounce of attention. You had done everything you could think of, except one thing. You knew interrupting their meeting was going to be met with a punishment, but at least you’d have him all to yourself.

A/N: I do not know where this came from, am I a Crocodile simp now 🤷‍♀️

Kinks included: Daddy kink, impact play, slight exibitionism

You could hear the sound of the clown’s whining through the heavy doors that separated you from the boardroom. Rarely did meetings need to be hosted anywhere besides the new Guild ship, but Crocodile claimed he needed a break from the gaudy circus-inspired interior so he offered up his own ship. The three of them had been hold up there since before you were awake, having rolled over to find the other side of the bed empty and cool to the touch. You had been milling around the doors, hoping they could at the very least call for a break so you could see him but as the hours stretched on you grew impatient.

Over the past few weeks he had been so caught up in his guild work that you had barely been able to see him, you were lucky if you were able to even get a few words in before he went to bed. Sometimes you even followed him to your shared bedroom, in hopes you could bother him for the quickest of quickies. But every time he would just pull you against his bare chest and fall asleep, barely a word spoken between you two. You understood he was tired, you were conscious that he had been working extremely long hours but it seemed as though you weren’t even there. And you intended to end that here and now.

You had put on an outfit you knew he was partial to, a black silky dress the fell to your mid thigh. It had black lace along the hem, neckline and the narrow straps, it was the simplest dress you owned but something about the way the fabric hugged your wide hips always made him go crazy. You had paired it with simple black boots that sat just below your knee, a gold SC could be seen on the back of the heel but other then that they were plain. You had gone to his private bar and poured him a glass of his favourite scotch in a crystal glass, along with a glass and bottle of red wine you knew would be up to Mihawk’s standards. For the clown you brought water, hoping the two would allow the poor thing to actually drink it.

With a deep breath you pushed opened the heavy door, feeling heat begin to radiate from between your legs as soon as you saw Crocodile, who’s head whipped to look at who had the audacity to interrupt. All eyes were on you, their conversation pausing as they took you in. “I know you’re busy, but I thought I’d bring you all something to drink to tide you over until dinner is ready.” You walked first to Mihawk’s side, setting the glass down in front of him and slowly pouring the wine for him, turning the bottle as you did so to avoid it dripping when you filled the glass halfway. You could feel the other two’s eyes scan over your body when you faced Mihawk, who’s eyes were shamelessly running up and down your form. “Thank you my dear, you’re so thoughtful.” His hand caught yours as you placed the bottle on the table, bringing your hand to his lips, his gaze averting from you to Crocodile’s. “You’ve got yourself quite the woman, Crocodile.” His lips moved against your hand in a way your body could hardly handle, finally allowing your hand to slip from his when the man across the table cleared his throat.

“I also brought Buggy water, but I can just put that here.” You placed the water next to Mihawk, hazarding a look at the clown who’s head sat at the end of the table, a prominent bump above his eyes and his blue tangled tresses surrounding him. You could tell he wanted to thank you, but he kept his mouth shut, only giving you a small nod so you knew he was grateful.

You picked up the glass you had left at the head of the table, walking around so you could place it on Crocdile’s right side, making sure to bend over the table as you slid the glass across the wooden surface. You knew if he tried he could easily see the hint of your purple panties, you picked them specifically to match the vest he was currently wearing, the white lace on the sems perfectly mimicking the piping that accented his outfit. “Can I bring anything else for any of you?” You couldn’t resist touching him, your hand running from his shoulder to behind his neck where you tried to card your fingers through the hair at the base of his neck before he fidgeted, his sign for you to get your hands away. With a huff you pulled your hand away, drawing your attention back to the other two men at the table.

“I’m quite alright, but thank you little rabbit.” Mihawk’s eyes held yours, the yellow rings of his iris making it difficult to tear your gaze away, but when you felt a hand on the back of your thigh your eyes moved without question to the man next to you.

“S-sir” Slipped from your lips in a breathy tone, half startled from the unexpected touch so close to where you needed him most. You looked at him, his brow knit together in irritation. “Can I bring you anything to eat?” He shook his head, blowing a cloud of smoke at you. He moved in his chair, bringing his leg to drape over his knee and god you wanted to sit in his lap, to feel his wide chest against your back, his hook running along your inner thigh, his fingers grazing over your covered core.

“No, go away, we have more work to do.” You wanted to fight it, argue that you had some use in this meeting, you knew that would at best be met with a laugh but that was unlikely. You wanted to kiss him, to leave a lipstick stain on his cheek that could be a silent reminder that you’d be waiting for him, but you knew that would be a mistake. So you walked out, pulling the doors closed behind you, only catching the cold words of Crocodile saying “Shut up” to something Mihawk must have said but you had missed.

You were yet to know whether your plan was a success so you made your way to his office, closing the door behind you and flicking on the dim light. You curled up in the green velvet loveseat he bought specifically for you. He always liked you having a place in his rooms, somewhere that you can stay when he wants you to be near him but still be able to get work done. You picked up the book you had left there from the last night you had tried to stay up late enough to see him, not knowing he was going to go straight to bed. Tonight wouldn’t be like that, you were determined to see him, the throbbing between your legs demanded it.

Just when you were thinking you were going to go find a different set of four walls to stare at, your book barely holding your attention anymore, you heard the sound of pristine dress shoes click against the wood floorboards. You froze, your book clutched in your hands to make it seem like you were reading and not just counting down the seconds until you hoped his meeting wrapped up. The door opened and there he was. You had to push the moan down that tried to bubble up just at the sight of him, it would have shown just how down bad you really were. As he closed the door his eyes landed on you and you tried desperately to act like you didn’t notice. He didn’t say anything to you right away, walking around his desk and sitting down with a new stack of papers he must have brought from the meeting. “You think you’re real clever don’t you?” He dug through his desk drawer before pulling out his monogrammed fountain pen, beginning to sign document after document, only stopping occasionally to read over whatever was written on it.

“I was just trying to be hospitable.” You peaked over the top of your book, noticing how his eyebrow twitched.

“You’re well on your way to a punishment if you keep that up.”

“I didn’t do anything wrong.” You push yourself upright from the way you naturally slouched, stretching your legs out, the heels of your bare feet digging into the velvet, having taken your boots and knee highs off shortly after settling in to read. A deep chuckle falls from his lips, his shoulder shaking as he scrawls his signature on another dotted line.

“I can practically smell how wet you are from over here, but I’m not going to do anything about it until you can list off exactly what you did wrong.” The way in which he speaks to you is reminiscent of how someone might relay the weather, not as though he’s giving you instructions that only dampen your panties more.

“M-Maybe I’ll just go find Mihawk and see if he’ll help me. I am his rabbit after all.” Crocodile scoffed at your attempt to be smug, watching as you coyly crossed your ankles bringing his gaze down your pale legs to your freshly manicured toes before crawling back up to your face that you try to cover with your book that you’re clearly not actually reading. “Or maybe I’ll ask Buggy.” You allowed your eyes to flick up from the pages just in time to see the large man crunch his cigar between his molars.

“Go ahead, you’ll just come crying back to me when they can’t make you cum.” He shrugged, thumbing through the remaining papers in his pile of yet to be signed documents. The conversation died, you tried to go back to your book and he went back to his work. The sound of his ballpoint pen scratching against the paper was the only sound that filled the room. With every piece of paper he moved from his right to his left you hoped he would turn his attention to you, but he never did. You rub your thighs together looking for any kind of pressure to ease the pulsing between your legs but nothing seems to help.

”I-I shouldn’t have interrupted your meeting.” The only sign that he heard you was a short hum that you knew as an affirmative sound.

“That’s one.”

“But you’ve been in meetings all month, I thought if you had the meeting here I could come see you more, I miss you.”

“No, your cunt misses me.” You had to clench your teeth together to stop the moan from pushing out of your parted lips at the mention of your cunt which was begging to be touched.

“So what if my cunt missed you, is that not enough?”

“Your cunt misses me the second I pull out, if I came to you every time she missed me, I’d get nothing done.” The way he spoke to you, spoke about you, never failed to make your cheeks burn but as the room fell silent again, and even the smell of his cigar, a habit that a few months ago you found disgusting now makes the throb between your legs excruciating. “I shouldn’t have bent over the table in front of you.” Your words were barely loud enough for him to hear but you knew he did. You hoped that that would be enough to appease him, enough to get him to give into you but you knew by the curt nod it wasn’t.

“There’s more to the list then that, but you’re doing better.”

“This isn’t fair.” You weren’t proud of the whiny tone your voice took on, but it had been weeks since you had sex, even longer since you had touched yourself, and this was pushing you beyond your limit.

“Quit your whining, I’ve told you what you need to do to get what you want, it’s not my fault you refuse to follow basic instructions.”

“I don’t know what else I did!”

“That’s not my problem.” You could hear the irritation that was bleeding into his tone, his eyebrows knit together as he ground what little of the cigar that was left between his teeth.

“Are you mad he kissed my hand? Mad that he called me his rabbit?” You tossed your book down by your feet, swinging your legs forward so they dangled just off the ground. “Mad that I brought Buggy water, or was it just the simple fact that I was there that bothered you so much?”

“I’m not playing this game with you, if you think those are the things you did wrong then just say that.” You let out a frustrated groan as you dug the heels of your palm into your eyes. You push yourself up to your feet, walking over to his desk and standing there waiting for him to notice you. He knows you’re there, you know he does, but his lack of acknowledgement makes you want to slam your hands on his desk in anger. “Please.” You whine.

“I’ve told you what you have to do, I’m not in the mood to make compromises.”

“Can I make it up to you?”

“You can’t make up for something if you don’t know what that something is.” You wanted to leave, to turn on your heel and slam his office door behind you. You wanted to march up to your shared bedroom, shove your face into his pillow and finger fuck yourself enough times that the throbbing between your legs is replaced by the prickle of overstimulation, but you knew if you did that you would be facing an even worse punishment then this.

“Please Sir.” You watched as he slammed his hook in the desk, his gaze finally meeting yours, his dark eyes somehow even darker.

“There it is again.”

“I-I thought you liked it when I cal-“

“Enough.” He interrupted you, pushing himself to his feet finally. “First you allow him to touch you, to kiss you. Then you throw yourself at me in the middle of a meeting, when I’ve explicitly told you to never do that. You acted like a slut in front of my colleagues, you invade my office without permission, flaunting your greedy little cunt to me while I’m trying to work and now you have the audacity to beg.” He pulled the butt of his cigar out from between his teeth, stubbing it out in the ash tray on his desk. “I thought you were finally trained, then out of nowhere you act out like this.” He walked around the heavy oak desk, pausing only to drape his gray fur coat over the back of his chair before continuing around to tower over you. You try to take a step back, to put some distance between you two, reminded of the sheer power he wields over you, but he’s quick to hold you in place with his hook. “And now, after all that whining you finally get my attention and what, you try to back away from me?” He shakes his head at you, clicking his tongue disapprovingly. “You know what’s coming, don’t you?” He doesn’t fight the wicked smile that spreads over his wide mouth as you shake your head, eyes wide. “Come now baby girl, it hasn’t been that long since I’ve had to punish you, you must remember”

“I-I don’t remember, really.” That was a lie, you knew exactly what was coming but you were living for this game you were playing. His aroma wrapped around you like vice, encompassing you completely in his colegn and the smell of his cigar, making your head swim.

“I guess I’ll have to remind you then, won’t I?” With a quick movement he shoved you into the densely cushioned high back of the loveseat. You quickly knocked your book on the ground, making sure it wasn’t going to get in the way of whatever was coming next. “I suppose no matter how well you train a bitch, she’ll eventually bite the hand that feeds her.” He made his way over to you, taking his time. He holds out his hand to you, palm upturned, his signal that he wanted you to remove his cufflink, a task that proved more difficult for him then he would ever admit.

You reach out, using both hands to guide the cufflink out from the French cuff before placing the small piece of gold that was shaped to into a crocodile head with tiny emerald eyes into his hand before rolling his sleeve up just above his elbow. When you were done you sat back on the chair, rubbing your thighs together as you waited for your next instructions. He brought a hand to your cheek and you braced for a swift smack, but it never came. Instead he cupped your cheek, his thumb running over your top lip, smearing the light pink lipstick onto your skin. You parted your lips, hoping he’d press his thick thumb into your mouth, but instead he slipped his hand down your face to your neck. His gaze fell to watch his hand tug gently at the golden chain that adorned your neck, it had been the first gift he gave you, something he insisted you wear at all times. It was simple, nothing overly complex or flashy, a buckle closure chainmail style gold necklace that sat at the base of your neck. Something that he often would idolly tug at, tightening the chain around your neck before releasing it. “Over the arm of the couch.” The words fell out of his mouth while he ran his hand over your neckline, the rough pads of his fingers following the fabric of your dress, toying with the thin strap before finally pulling away and stepping back.

You stood, stepping around Crocodile and laying over the arm of your loveseat. There was enough cushioning on it that it wasn’t overly uncomfortable but you knew the position wasn’t the punishment. He grabbed the hem of your dress, pulling it up and over you so it pooled just below the back of your bra, leaving your thighs, ass and lower back completely exposed. You knew when you heard the deep chuckle that he had noticed just how soaked your panties were, the sheer purple fabric leaving very little to the imagination even in the most pristine conditions, but you were confident that they were so wet the fabric was entirely see through. “Did you wear this outfit just to tempt me?” He ran a hand up the back of your thigh, grabbing the meat of your ass roughly.

“Y-yes.” You mumbled, face pressed into the velvet.

“What about these?” You felt the cool metal of his hook press right against your folds, the slick gathered there making the cool temperature of his golden hook even more noticeable. When you opened your mouth to speak, all you could do was moan, finally feeling his touch where you needed it the most.

“Yes, just for you.” He hummed approvingly, pulling his hook away from you with only a mild whine.

“Because you dressed so nicely for me, I’m feeling generous.” He ran his hand up over your ass and to your lower back, the pressure making your back arch more before he returned to your butt, grabbing the fat there. “I’m going to tell you all the things you did that pissed me off.”

“T-thank you, daddy.” He groaned at the name, you knew that was his favourite, always had been.

“And maybe next time, you’ll remember this and won’t do it again.” You nodded.

You heard the sound before you felt the sting of the first hit. The slap sound was loud enough to make you jump but he held you in place with his heavy hook that was pressing down on the small of your back. “That one’s for interrupting us.” This time you were ready for the impact, but that didn’t make it hurt any less. “And that one’s for letting him touch you.” You yelped when his hand met your cheek again, the burn apparent even when his hand disappeared between hits. “And letting him kiss you.” You wanted to correct him, he kissed your hand, but you knew that would only anger him more. “This one is for touching me like that in front of my colleagues.” That one hurt. A long high pitched moan slipped from your lips as your fingers tried to find purchase on the velvet fabric beneath you. “Another for showing me these slutty panties when you knew I couldn’t touch them.” You’re sure your ass is beat red at this point, but the way he would rub a circle on the abused spot in between smacks fanned the flames of your arousal. “And this one, this one baby girl is for calling me Sir in front of them.” That one was the hardest by far, your body tensing from the impact, a yelp falling from your lips. “Do you know how hard hearing you say that made me?” He moved slightly, allowing himself to lean over you, his hook gone from your lower back and replaced with his arm hooking underneath your waist, his hand dangerously close to your cunt.

“I’m so sorry daddy, I just- I missed you so much.” Your eyes were welling with tears from the spanking but you could almost feel his erection against you.

“I know you did baby girl, I’ve missed you too. But you can’t interrupt me when I’m working.” He moved your hair to the side so he could press sloppy kisses along your shoulders. The moment his lips were on you you were a moaning mess. “You looked so pretty when you came into the room, in my favourite dress, all done up pretty for me.” You nodded “you know how much I love when you have your hair down.” Finally you felt it, his covered erection as he humped against your raised ass. “And the boots,” he groaned into the crook of your neck. “Next time you come into my office, I want you in nothing but those boots and your necklace.”

“Anything for you, daddy.” That sentance was incredibly difficult to get out between the flow of moans. “C-can you please fuck me?”

“I wish I could, baby girl.”

“Why can’t you?” You brokenly half sobbed.

“I have work to finish.” You could feel him begin to pull away, as though he just remembered the stack of paper he abandoned in order to punish you. He stood up, making sure to look at the bright red that adorned your ass before adjusting himself in his dress pants. You forced yourself off the arm of the couch, rubbing at the soon-to-be bruise that would be across your stomach, your dress falling back down as you straightened. He was walking back around his desk before you had a chance to touch him, knowing that if you could rope him into a kiss that work wasn’t going to get done tonight.

He sat heavily in his desk chair, picking his pen up against and reading over the paper he had in front of him. You stood next to the couch, balling the hem of your dress in your fists as you tried to decide what to do next. “Is it that bad?” He sighed, looking up at you while he snipped the end of fresh cigar before holding it between his teeth to light it. You nodded, rubbing your thighs together to emphasize your point. “Come here.” He pushed his chair back a bit as you walked around the desk. “You’re going to have to entertain yourself while I finish this up.” You nodded, noticing how he angled his leg out from under his desk. You knew what he was offering. At this point you were so desperate you would have taken anything, you’d hoped for his cock but you would have been content with his hook, but yet, you were left with his thigh. But you could make it work.

You straddled his thigh, grabbing his dress pants as much as you could as you rutted against him slowly, getting closer to him until you could rest your head on his shoulder. You couldn’t stop the breathy moan that slipped through your parted lips. The feeling of having anything rubbed against your folds felt heavenly, even if it was just his slender thigh clad in expressive dress pants. The smell of him was intoxicating, leaned your head against his shoulder, your arms wrapped around his bicep, thankful for his hooked hand that supported you as you rutted against him, moans and breathy whines flowing out of your mouth as easily as your slick had gathered. “How’s that feel, baby girl?” You knew it was taking all the willpower he had to keep working and not to just sit and watch you hump his leg in desperation.

“G-good, it’s good.” You pinched your eyes closed trying to focus on the high that seemed to be alluding you.

“Only good?”

“I can think of a few other things that would feel better.” You were surprised you even managed to get that sentence out between your breathy moans.

“Oh yeah, why don’t you tell me some?” You should have known he was going to say that. You could hear him scribbling his signature on paper after paper, not taking as much time to review whatever it was before signing it.

“Your fingers, your hook-“ his hook slipped from your hip and ran along your bare thigh, prematurely ending your sentence with a surprised moan. “Your your tongue, god, your face.” Something halfway between an uh huh and a groan came from beside you as you humped against his thigh, your nails digging into his arm as you tried to steady yourself now that his hook was running up and down your thigh. “Your cock.”

“Thought you almost forgot that one.” He let out a low chuckle before you heard his pen hit the desk followed by the feeling of his hand on your head. “Take that dress off, give me something to watch.” He leaned back in his chair as you pulled the silk garment over your head, tossing it beside you. Your bra was next to follow, quickly joining the dress on the ground. You looked up at him, your eyes meeting his grey ones as he puffed out a cloud of smoke from the side of his mouth. “I think you’ve worked hard enough to get a little reward.” You were nodding before he was even done his sentance. “Stand up for me” Your legs were a bit shakey when you stood up off his thigh but when he offered you his hook for support it was much easier to move from his thigh to stand between his spread legs. “Let’s get these off, shall we?” He grabbed your panties and yanked them down your legs, impatience clear in his movements. You stepped out of them, kicking them in the vague direction of the rest of your clothes before you leaned into his large chest. You pulled the cigar from his mouth, placing it on the ash tray before wrapping your hands around his neck and carding them through in his longer hair.

Your lips were on his and all seemed right in the world again. It was crazy to think that you didn’t remember the last time the two of you had shared a passionate kiss like this. The silk of his vest was a nice contrast to the heat your body was radiating as his hand slid down and between your legs. “Do you know how badly I wanted to just slip my fingers between your legs when you interrupted our meeting?” His first finger slipped right in, no resistance, nothing, as though your body was begging for him. You could feel his ring slip inside, your slick gathering along the golden band. “I wanted you to stand there and take it, maybe even bend over the table so I could see your greedy little hole swallow my fingers.” He guided your head onto his shoulder, your nails digging into his neck and shoulder as you moaned against him. “Would you have liked that? If Mihawk and the clown watched you get finger fucked by me?” You nodded before a strangled yes was able to slip out. He pressed another thick finger into your hole, the squelching sound they were making as he fucked into you was bordering on pornographic, and your stream of moans wasn’t helping that image either. “Maybe they’re still here, should I call them in to watch how I can make you beg?” You shook your head, unable to get the word out. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt you so wet.” He whispered into your hair, pressing a kiss to your neck.

His thick fingers were fucking into you, the slapping was becoming louder, if that was even possible. “You’ve lasted longer than I expected.”

“You h-haven’t said I can c-u-um yet.”

“There’s my well trained girl. Are you close?” You answer him with a broken sob, and normally he would make you work for it, make you beg. But he takes pity on you, his own erection becoming irritating so in interest of progressing the night he huskily whispers “Cum for me, baby girl.” And you do. A crashing wave of pleasure washes over you. You’re sure that if he hadn’t been holding you upright you could have crumbled at his feet. His fingers kept moving instead of you, slowing down but not ready to pull out yet. When he finally does, nudging his shoulder to get your attention as he licks the digits, knowing how much you like to see him taste you in any capacity. Your eyes are glued to how his tongue moves, and he’s very aware of that fact. “Do you wanna taste yourself?” You nodded, opening your mouth so he could push his fingers inside.

The taste of your own arousal filled your mouth, and at the same time the fingers in your mouth were forcing you to your knees, pushing down with enough force on your tongue to get the message across.

You could smell his musk before your fingers were able to work the button of his pants open. As you fumbled with deft fingers you looked up at him, his big hand running through your hair, a cascade of smoke flowing from his mouth. “What I wouldn’t do to have you sit between my legs like this every guild meeting.” When his pants were open you quickly drew his cock and balls from inside, a motion that had become quite practiced after knowing Crocodile as long as you had.

With one hand wrapped around the girthy base, you pull it forward enough that you could lick a long strip to his engorged head before encircling it with your lips. “I think you can fit more of me between those pretty lips, don’t you?” The hand that was on your head started pushing you down, inch by inch you got closer to his well kept dark curls. When you got just over half of him down your throat you could feel your body begin to reject the intrusion, drool spilling from your mouth in amounts you found disgusting but he found thrilling. He knew if you ever stopped allowing yourself to be pushed down anymore you were at your limit. Instead of pushing he grabbed a fistful of your hair and pulled you off his cock.

Your chin and lips were covered in shiny spit, your lipstick smeared and your eyeliner smudged from your tears. To him, there were few times you looked better than this. “I think you’re out of practice.” You nodded, your mind clouded by your arousal. “Let’s try again, shall we?” Again you nodded, resting your hands on either thigh, noticing the wet spot on his left thigh from where you had ground against him.

A knock at the door seemed to startle both of you, but lucky for you, Crocodile was great at problem solving, specifically when it came to how he can keep his cock in your mouth. He ushered you under his desk, pulling his chair in close so you weren’t visible. “It’s me.” A voice you instantly recognized as Mihawk’s came from the other side of the door with a second knock, if you hadn’t been as close to Crocodile you would I have missed the groan that he quickly muffled with a cough.

“Yeah yeah, come in.” The cigar was back between his teeth, the pen in his hand, as though Mihawk had just walked in on him actually working. You could hear the door open, and quiet footsteps towards you.

“Did you have a chance to look everything over?”

“Yeah, just finished.” With your limited space you couldn’t move up high enough on your knees to swallow him entirely, so you were stuck just mouthing at his shaft, licking at the drips of pre cum as they slid down from his head.

“Thank you, I didn’t realize how much it was until after the meeting.” Crocodile hummed. “Unfortunately, I have more.” You heard more paper being put down on the oak desk and a groan of irritation from the man who’s cock you wanted to choke on. There was a silence that hung in the air and you couldn’t tell what was happening, which drove you crazy. “I think you should host more of our meetings, it was a much needed change of scenery from the atrocious ship that carries our flag.” Crocodile scoffs, and you can’t tell if it’s to cover up a pleasurable sound or if it was the real reaction to the sentence. You wondered if Mihawk could pick up on the smell of sex, to you it was all you could smell.

“Why don’t we go to your ship if the only reason is a change of pace?”

“Because, unfortunately I don’t have an attractive little rabbit to bring me wine at the drop of a hat. So I believe I prefer it here”

“Too bad I don’t have a little rabbit to bring you wine either, a shame really.” You could practically picture his face, an eyebrow cocked, cigar held tightly between his teeth, his nose scrunched in disgust at the thought of Mihawk giving his property such a ill suited pet name. You continued to leave sloppy kisses to the underside of his cock, occasionally running your tongue along the crest just under his head, noticing the way it bobbed when you did.

“Where is she, I’d hate to leave without showing her how grateful I was for that wine to get me through a rather dull meeting.”

“I can pass the message along to her.” You had begun nipping at his heavy balls, your hand working his shaft without getting too close to the head, worried you might bump against the table and give yourself away.

“I’d prefer to see her myself.”

“I’m sure you would, but she’s busy.” You could hear the smirk on his face and the air grew thick with silent again. You assumed Mihawk was scanning the room, eventually noticing the pile of clothes next to Crocodile’s desk, piecing everything together rapidly. You wished you could see his expression, see how his ringed eyes widened for half a second before bringing his expression back to placid.

“I suppose I’ll leave you to it then.” The quiet footsteps retreated to the door before you heard the door close again.

Crocodile pushed his chair from the desk, giving you enough room to crawl out from your spot. Before he could try to speak you were swallowing his cock just how you had tried to before being shoved under the desk. You had barely been at it for 5 minutes and your jaw was already starting to get sore but you couldn’t stop. You stroked whatever you couldn't fit into your mouth, which was progressively getting less and less but you were interrupted by his hand pulling you up by your hair. “I don’t plan on wasting my seed in your mouth.” Which was his way of saying you were doing too good of a job.

“Did he know?” Your voice was a bit gravelly but as he pulled you upright by your hair he smiled.

“Would you like it if he had?” Your lack of an answer was all he needed. “Should I call him back to watch?” He pulled the cigar from his mouth, putting it in his ashtray again before standing up. “Get on the desk, princess. I’m gonna’ make it all up to you.” You leaned back against the edge of the desk, struggling slightly for a second before you were able to scoot back further, spreading your legs as you leaned back, being mindful of the newest stack of papers.

He dragged his hook up your stomach, circling your nipples with the curved part of his hook watching with a smirk at how you arched into his touch, catching your lip between your teeth to try and hold back your whines. He slowly stroked his cock with his other hand, watching how your chest rose and fell quickly as you tried to catch your breath but with no luck. “I bet you wish he could see you now, hm?” You tried to look away from him but he was quick to guide your face back towards him with his hook. “I bet you got so wet when he called you his little rabbit.” You shook your head weakly. “Would you prefer to be splayed out on his desk?” You shook your head again, more sure this time. “No?” His hook slid down your body again, the curved back sliding between your folds as you bucked up to chase the pressure.

“I don’t want to be with him.”

“Who do you want to be with?”

“You.” He hummed, his grip on his cock tightened and his strokes slowed to a near stop.

“And who’s cock do you want?”

“Your’s.”

“Show me how wet you are.” Holding yourself as steady as you could on one elbow you used your other hand to dive between your folds. If it was anyone else, you’d be embarrassed by how wet you were, your slick pooling around your worked open entrance, but you know Crocodile found you the most attractive when you were splayed open and sopping wet. You finger fucked your self for a second, trying to gather as much slick as you could before pulling your digits out, separating them so Crocodile could see your arousal webbed between them. “And who got you this wet?”

“You.” You were getting annoyed with his questions, you gaze struggling to meet his instead of looking down at his cock.

“Oh I’m sorry, am I bothering you?” There was irritation in his inflection, he took pressing into your chest to push you down flat against the desk.

“I-I just w-want you to fuck me.” He dragged his burning hot cock along your folds, watching it glide with extreamly ease through your slick but never pushing against your entrance, much to your frustration.

“You know giving me attitude isn’t how you get what you want, unless what you’re hoping for is more neglect.” He continued rubbing his cock between your folds, the sight of his size compared to you never ceased to concern you, despite having been fucked by him countless times you always had the concern of what if it doesn’t fit?

“Daddy please.” His hook slid down your body, wrapping around your left thigh to pull it open even more, pulling your foot up to perch on the edge of the desk for leverage. His other hand abandoned his cock to grab your right thigh and press it against your chest, giving him more control over you as he pressed his cock into you finally.

The stretch always burned, whether you hadn’t had sex in weeks or less than 24. For all Crocodile is, ruthless, greedy, cruel, he was extremely conscious of his size in comparison to yours. When you bared your teeth at the stretch he leaned over you, pausing halfway inside of you as he pressed a kiss to your forehead, shushing you. “You’re doing so good for me, just relax.” His voice was quiet, this tone was one reserved only for you.

“It’s b-been so long it hurt-s.” You pinched your eyes closed, feeling tears prick at the corners.

“I know princess, I know. Just relax and I’ll go real slow, we have all the time in the world.” His hand slipped between the two of you, rubbing gentle circles on your clit in hopes of getting you more wet and distracting you from the discomfort. “You’re such a good girl for daddy.” He pressed his hips into you again, slowly. You could feel every inch of him bully its way into your body until his head was pressed against your cervix, finally fully inside. “Look how good you’re doing, how’s that feel?” His forehead was pushed against your’s, his eyes glued to your expression, waiting for you to open your eyes. You could smell his smoke on his breath mixed with his expensive scent, you could feel his warm breath puff out over your face as you slowly opened your eyes. The first thing you saw was his scar, stretched over the bridge of his nose, then you finally met his grey eyes that were glued to you. “How’s it feel?” He repeated, this time a bit more stern.

“It’s getting better.” he hummed in acknowledgment.

“Suppose I should do something to distract you, what do you think?” You nodded, your doe eyes making him want to ravage you but he forced himself to hold back, admitting to himself that it had, in fact, been quite a while since you two had had sex and he knew his size was a struggle for someone half his size. “Lean back for me, baby girl.” He straightened up enough to prompt you to lay back, your hands out at your sides waiting for his next move.

With his cock still nestled inside your tight walls he leaned forward again, lips pressing kisses from your belly button to your clavicle, before branching off and trailing kisses to your nipple. You expected him to run his tongue over the hard bud, to tease you until you were writhing on the desk, but instead he sucked on it, drawing cries from your lips. He could feel you relax around him and all he wanted to do was throw your legs over his shoulders and fuck you so hard he would have to carry you everywhere with him. But he resisted. Upon instinct, hands grabbed his head keeping him close to your chest as he suckled. Your fingers carded through his slicked back hair, something you rarely ever got to do, especially not during sex. But you had been such a good girl, he would let you have this one.

“D-daddy I think-“ You got caught off by him pulling his cock out, not entirely but enough that a high pitched gasp slipped from your lips and cut your sentence off prematurely.

”What was that?” He released your nipple and pulled away from your skin, your arms opting to move to his neck rather than letting him go completely.

“I need you t-to move, p-please.” He obligated, slowly thrusting back into you, hoping you weren’t still uncomfortable but taking it slow on the off chance you were.

“How’s that feel, princess” You took a deep breath, your head lolling backwards.

”Feels so good, daddy, so good.”

“Doesn’t hurt anymore?” You shook your head, your arms slipping from around his neck as he stood up straight, pulling one of your legs over his shoulder, the other dangling limply off the desk. ”Good, now I want you to do something for me.” He leisurely fucked you, enjoying how your walls no longer resisted his intrusion.

“Anything.”

“I want you to be as loud as you want, let that pesky Mihawk know whose cock you want.” You loved when he was possessive of you, you wouldn’t have been all that surprised if he called Mihawk in to watch him fuck you, and frankly, you wouldn’t have protested that in the least. ”Think you can handle that?” You nodded, a breathy yes the only thing you could really manage. The small part of your brain that wasn’t lost in the pleasure of Crocodile’s cock finally fucking into you wondered if Mihawk really was still around, if he actually would hear you. But that part of your brain wasn’t able to function for much longer once you were put into a mating press.

Your moans flowered from your open mouth like the sound of rushing water from a river. He always tried to muffle his own sound, pressing his face into your neck when he felt his own peak rapidly approaching. “Fuck princess, never felt a cunt like yours.” The desk was shaking from his strength, the stack of papers beside you was beginning to shift.

“Croc-co, fuck it f-feels so good!” You wrapped your arms around his wide back, digging your nails into the expensive silk back of his vest. He was past the point of his toying, unable to put together a sentence the only sounds coming out of his mouth were animalistic grunts into your neck.

“Gonna’ fill you up so good, do you want that baby girl, do you want me to fill that greedy little cunt of yours?” You tried to speak but every time you opened your mouth all that came out were a slew of moans. His hand slid down your thigh and found its way to your clit, his thumb rubbing it in uneven circles as his cock pressed against your cervix repeatedly. “Are you going to cum?” He lifted his head from your neck so he could see you, see your cock drunk expression as you nodded. “Ask me for it.”

“D-daddy daddy please, please let me cum, I wanna cum around your cock!” Your words were sloppy and punctuated by moans but it seemed to appease him. His thrusts changed, his pace uneven and the force was enough to knock the stack of papers off the desk, not their either of you noticed.

He came first but the feeling of warmth that spread through you as he pressed the pad of his thumb against your clit was enough to force you over the edge seconds after. Your back arched off the table, your toes pointed and tensed around his shoulders. There was no doubt in your mind that if Mihawk were still aboard he was extremely aware of what was going on in this office.

Crocodile’s thrusts slowed until eventually he stilled. You were trying to catch your breath but it seemed impossible, especially with the weight of his entire body on top of you. You wanted to move, to pull your legs off his shoulders but you didn’t want to risk him getting up and going back to work. He didn’t stay on top of you for long, eventually straightening up and looking you up and down, all while his cock was still nestled between your walls.

He reached for his cigar, bringing it to his lips and pulling hard on it, hoping some of the embers would flare to life again. He guided your legs off his shoulders, pressing a kiss to your ankles as he did so. As he pulled his cock from your cunt slowly, he watched as his cum began to work its way out of you. Idolly as he stood over you, cigar in his mouth he ran his big fingers in the milky liquid that was cascading from your fucked hole, almost trying to push it back into you.

You still were out of it, your hips bucking from overstimulation anytime he grazed your clit. “Do you feel better, baby?” He wiped his fingers on your thigh before cupping your cheek, pulling your unfocused gaze to him. You blinked a few times, trying to unblur your eyes as you nodded.

“I think I may need you to carry me to bed.” He chuckled, stepping away from you for the first time since you had come over to his desk. He picked up your discarded clothes before returning to his spot between your legs, taking a second to stuff his cock back into his slacks and do them up again. Carefully and with great care he guided you into a sitting position and helped you pull your dress over your head, leaving your panties, bra and socks on his desk before picking you up bridal style. You leaned against his chest as he carried you out of the office, the steady sound of his heartbeat lulling you to sleep.

Sleep that you were quickly pulled from. “I take it the second stack of papers has yet to be looked at?” You heard the faint sound of a wine glass being placed on the board room table as you passed by the open doors. Crocodile paused in the doorway, turning to look at him for a second before smirking,

“Let me put my little rabbit to bed then I’ll go look at them.”

[ideas-4-stories]

We need a break from the angst

Cross guild romance: during the time between leaving Shanks and running his own crew, Buggy actually did work in the circus for a bit. He wasn't a clown though - he had a sort of fire dance routine (I imagine it being like this tiktok https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8fD7Rkn/). That was also where he really got into chemistry and his Muggy Balls; he was in charge of his prop so he learned how to make the flame ball himself. Fast forward and it's been a long time since he had that act but he still enjoys practicing it every now and then. It makes him feel more confident and in control. One day Crocodile and Mihawk are looking for Buggy because of a problem with one of the recent bounties. They find him in a tent on the outskirts of Buggy Town doing his routine and. Wow. The power he seems to possess as he performs is certainly a sight. They forget what they were originally going to discuss and instead start to brainstorm ways to get Buggy to give them a private performance after which they can show him just how much they enjoyed the show (*wink wink*).

Just. Buggy being incredibly confident, capable, and skilled when performing and Croc and Hawk realizing that when Buggy's doing what he loves where he belongs (in the spotlight) he's a sight they want to keep for their eyes only.

Thanks for the break of angst, I love fluff way more than angst. Buggy being amazing at Fire Dancing!!! Hell YEAH!!!!!!

I love the headcanon that he's really good at almost everything with circus acts. Now I'm thinking after the dance is done he does that think with the fire breathers. Making the flame larger before putting them out and packing it all up. Before he thinks Mihawk and Crocodile realizes that he's gone and start to have a fit.

Didn't they have a private show just now? 😆 Well then again Buggy didn't know they were there. And of course, Buggy's amazing while performing. He's flashy like that... I could never with my stage fright even if I love acting. It's truly a horrible combination for me.

Anyway more not Buggy, because this ask ain't for me!

I have an idea of what Buggy did before going back to being a pirate. I mean after his captain being murdered basically in front of him while people are screaming and cheering for his death and the betrayal Shanks did. Which I get from Buggy PoV, that Shanks basically spit on Roger's name and broke his promises to Buggy. I understand why Buggy is pissed off at Shanks and why he wouldn't want to be a pirate for a while.

[theoddcatlady]

Instructions on How to Become a Clown

Found this journal in an old storage locker I had taken possession of. It’s dated in the summer of 1985, and the pages are curled, smelling faintly of popcorn. As for the contents… well, go ahead and start reading.

June 1

Infiltrating Funtasia’s Dreamscape Circus was easier than I thought it was going to be. All I did was walk up to the ringmaster and he called me Petey, scolded me for showing up a day late, handed me a uniform, and told me to start mucking the animal cages. Whoever this Petey was, I’ll apologize at a later time for taking his job. I can just say I was confused since my real name is close enough to ‘Petey’.

This has to be where Janice Meyers ended up. The circus was in town the weekend she disappeared, and the friend of hers I interviewed said she had decided to go back on Saturday night. Her parents did admit there was an argument that night about their daughter’s grades, but insisted that Janice would never have run away of her own free will. But then again, fifteen year olds aren’t known for their soundest decisions.

Most circuses that have fallen into my line of investigation are closed communities- any outside questioning is shut off. I’ll have to spend a few days assuring these people I’m just like any of them. I just have to last long enough to determine if any of these people are Janice.

June 5

This is the easiest investigation I’ve ever had to conduct. Not only have the circus people been more than welcoming, I think I’ve figured out which one of the clowns is Janice.

Running away with the circus was a childhood dream of mine, and it seems she’s one of the people who pursued that dream. She says her name is Jenny, but her face shape is similar enough to to Janice’s. I just need to catch her out of make up- she goes everywhere with her face painted white and red hearts painted on her cheeks, so I’ve been yet to see if she has that beauty mark on her cheek. I’d like to catch her alone too, but she always hangs out with the fellow teenagers. It even appears she has a boyfriend, one of the acrobats named James.

What happened seemed straightforward at least. Girl falls in love with a boy, runs off to be with him, it’s the oldest story in the book. Once I confirm her identity, I’ll let her parents know posthaste. After, of course, I find the nearest police station and let them know that one of the clowns is a runaway girl.

June 8

Today was the first performance I was lucky enough to catch. This may be the most fun job I’ve taken in a long time. Most of the time, being a private investigator means I’m following unfaithful spouses or checking to see if someone’s scamming their insurance. Those drain at your sanity after a few years.

Today the ringmaster, Jacob Tanner, pulled me aside and told me to take a seat with the rest of the guests. I’ve worked hard, I deserve a breather.

The performances here are fantastic. The clowns are hilarious, the acrobats are graceful, and the animals are as gentle as your average pet dog or cat. Thanks to working here, I get free snacks too. I don’t know how it’s special, but the pink lemonade here is to die for. I’d drink it all day if my stomach wouldn’t explode.

Everything went off without a hitch, we’ll be on the road in the morning. I imagine I’ll confirm if Janice is Jenny for once and for all now that she’ll no doubt be out of costume. Such a shame too. I think she’s really enjoying her time here. But she is a child, and she needs to go back home.

June 15

Janice is Jenny. I caught her out of make up before she went on for her act, and she has the beauty mark. But there’s something stopping me from letting the police know.

There was an accident that happened tonight.

The act unfolded as normal, least I figure as much. A strongman named Louis Wicker was the base of a stack of clowns, at the top was young Janice. Five people stacked on one another, it was an unbelievable sight.

So unbelievable that it felt like a dream when Louis stumbled and the clown on his shoulders lost his balance. They all came crashing down like bowling pins. It certainly was not part of the act, judging by Janice’s terrified scream as she plummeted to the ground. I heard something crack and her body went limp.

A comical looking mini ambulance was driven out by more clowns as the ringmaster assured us all that everything was fine. The fake clown doctors tossed the clowns that were knocked unconscious by the fall into the ambulance with as much care as you’d throw a bag of flour. The conscious clowns and Louis were escorted off to the side.

I’ve tried to find the injured clowns after the performance, but they’re gone. I don’t know where they’re being kept. After a fall like that the extent of their injuries must be horrific. Tomorrow I’m going to the police to report this incident, as I didn’t see any real ambulances or any sign they were taken to a proper hospital. And without a doubt, Janice needs emergency care.

June 16

Now I’m just confused.

Janice is fine. Somehow completely, totally fine, as are the rest of the clowns and Louis. I saw her this morning at breakfast, just as energetic and happy as ever. She and James were sharing a plate of muffins and a bag of cotton candy… yes, for breakfast. Teenagers, what can you do. I’m not any better, I’m having pink lemonade with every meal, between them too. I may have to ask for the recipe, it’s genuinely the best lemonade I’ve ever had.

I did manage to question Janice about the fall and she brushed it off, saying that the clowns here have taken worse falls and bounced back even quicker. She mostly felt bad for Louis, she confided, as he blamed himself.

Something’s not right here. I’m going to stick around for a bit longer, as Janice is in perfectly good health and in no immediate danger. James seems like a solid boy, as does the other friends she’s picked up while she’s been here. We’re pulling into another town tonight.

June 18

We’re leaving tonight. We’re not spending the whole week here.

I’ve gotten quite used to the schedule already, especially because my job’s quite easy now that my muscles have adapted to the labor. So last night when I was roused and ordered to get the animals ready for travel, I was more than a little confused.

I managed to hitch a ride with James, Janice, and a juggler named Charlie. I grabbed a seat in front seat of the cab of their truck with Janice and Charlie. James was in the backseat with a girl I’d never seen before.

Teenager, not much older than Janice, with a blanket over her shoulders and face puffy and red with tears. I think she’s another runaway. James was very gentle with her, giving her water and pink lemonade to drink while stroking her hair. I’ve never met such a sensitive teenage boy, I can see why Janice is so taken with him.

Speaking of which- she’s not exactly happy with this new development. Ah, young love, truly so fickle. This might work out though, if Janice just wants to leave, then I’ll simply reveal my identity and take her home to her parents. It’s not like they can hold us here.

June 19

The kids spent their time coming up with a new name for the girl in the truck. Whatever her name was previously, she doesn’t want anything to do with it anymore. I don’t know much about her backstory, only that she was in a bad place and needed to get out.

After many ideas and more than a little bickering, James suggested the name Dixie, and that’s the name she’s going with. I think it’s rather cute, and it certainly suits her. Janice is managing to be polite, but I can already tell she’s seething with jealousy.

Something about that performance gone wrong is still nagging at me, and there is the fact that Dixie is likely another runaway child. But unlike Janice, I don’t think Dixie has a good home to return to, with parents that worry about her safety. She’s tense, flinches at loud voices and is constantly apologizing for just taking up space.

You won’t find me reporting her. That’s not my concern. My concern is Janice and no one else.

June 22

Last night’s show went well, Dixie’s yet to perform but according to James she’s currently training. Janice is sulky but refuses to tell James what’s on her mind, at least as far as I know. I think my plan of just waiting it out is actually going to pay off.

But then again, maybe I should spend more time second guessing my judgment.

It was after the show, I was heading back to the truck when I heard what I knew could only be one thing- drunk show goers. This wouldn’t be such a problem, except I was taking a shortcut through where the animals were kept after the show.

I made haste to the source and sure enough, these three idiots were sticking their hands in the cage, just for moments at a time to taunt the tigress that was in there. Obviously Lovely Belle, or just ‘Belle’ for short, was less than impressed.

I broke into a run when I saw that one of the idiots actually managed to get the cage door to unlock. It swung open and Belle trotted out, her ears pressed flat against her head as she growled. I expected one of the idiots to become mincemeat as I saw her raise her paw.

Only Charlie seemingly appeared out of nowhere and body slammed her target out of the way, saving him from his deserved fate of being a cat toy. The tiger raked its claws down Charlie’s back and he screeched before he tumbled to the ground, huddling into a little ball.

His yellow clown suit was soaked in blood by the time I got there. The idiots bolted, screaming their heads off, while Belle flopped down on the ground and licked clean her claws. In the dark it was nearly impossible to see how bad the wounds were, and before I could get him into the light the fellow circus people flooded around Charlie. Someone threw a blanket on him and the Wicker Brothers gathered him up and carried him into a trailer. Of course I told someone to call an ambulance, and I was assured that he’d be given proper medical care.

This morning though, Charlie’s back to… well, being Charlie. Little bastard put a tack on my seat and I didn’t notice it until I’d sat my full weight on it. He’s acting like nothing happened last night and assured me that it looked far worse than it was. He even demonstrated by taking off his shirt and gesturing to his back, which had only a few bandages on it- nothing like what you’d need if you were attacked by a tiger.

I keep telling myself that I really must have overreacted last night, that my brain is exaggerating the details. But as many times as I run the incident over and over again in my head… the more I’m certain that there’s no way in hell that Charlie should be okay right now.

June 25

Well, it finally happened. I’m taking Janice home.

I was talking with the clearly sullen girl, being as subtle as I could about her going home, when Dixie emerged from a tent. I’d not seen her since she was given her new name, I was starting to wonder where the girl had gotten off to, and here she was. She had pinned her hair up into twin pigtails and although her clown make up made her look like she was crying, she was clearly grinning from ear to ear. Dixie had become a clown, and I think that is the life that will suit her the best.

Charlie gaped like a fish and even James seemed taken off guard. “Already?” he croaked out, staring at the girl.

Dixie nodded and spun around. “I’m one of the clowns! Put away your frowns! I’ve taken them all, no more will I fall, for I am a clown!” she said before cartwheeling over to the table and using the flower pinned to her sweater to squirt me in the face with what smelled like really strong rose perfume.

Charlie clapped while James sprung to his feet, picking Dixie up and spinning her around and around. It might have gone a little over my head, but the three seemed really happy… until Janice slammed her fist into the table.

The girl had gone red with rage, getting to her feet and screaming, “Liar! Liar! It takes weeks to become a clown! You’re a fraud! A fake! A phony! Everything about you, from your name to… to you, is so disgusting and fake!”

It was so awkward. I desperately tried not to cringe, but I don’t think I quite managed. Dixie was surprised for a moment, before her bottom lip trembled. Now those tears going down her cheeks were real as she began to sob. Charlie got up to try to comfort her but she took off, running right back into the tent she had been training in.

James watched Dixie go before turning to Janice. To his credit, he seemed mostly calm, but his fists were balled up so tightly I was afraid I’d have to get between the lovebirds to prevent a brawl. He just gestured her to follow him and the pair went off.

I did my best to attempt to listen in on the argument, but I only got bits and pieces- enough to know that James called Janice for being way out of line and that although he really cared about her, he wasn’t really feeling the spark anymore. Janice accused him of leading her on and called Dixie a lot of names I won’t be writing down, as I don’t care for putting those kinds of words to paper, and she was the one that ended up trying to knock James’ block off. That’s when I intervened and separated the fighting teenagers.

While James blew off some steam with the knife throwers, I laid my cards on the table- I told Janice everything, that her parents sent me to find her, that they were really worried, and that it was time for her to come home. Maybe it’s a bit low to spring this offer on her when she was so emotionally raw, but it was my chance. And it worked.

We’ll be leaving Saturday night. One more performance, and then we’ll go when everyone’s packing up to go. I will miss my time at the circus. But I’m glad I’m going home.

June 30?

Everything’s fucked.

I don’t know what went wrong. Let me start from the beginning. Just in case I don’t make it out of here. Or maybe if I do. I’m so fucked.

Leaving went off without a hitch. Janice left a note for James, telling him goodbye and good luck with Dixie, and we took off in my car. No one even noticed we left, at least at the time. I wish someone did, someone stopped us before we went too far.

The drive was smooth, Janice badmouthed Dixie which I mostly ignored, I was already mentally making plans for how I was going to relax in the upcoming weeks… and then the cramps started.

It was just small twinges in my stomach at first. I figured my circus diet was finally catching up with me. I may have been in the best shape of my life, but you can only eat corndogs and circus peanuts for so long before something gives.

Janice rubbed her neck, muttering about being sore. The last thing I said was that I was pretty sure that the ibuprofen was in the glovebox when my gut erupted in pain. I nearly doubled over, going stiff as I wrapped a hand around my middle. I couldn’t speak, the pain was so bad. I tried to tell Janice that I needed to pull over because I was going to be sick, but the moment I opened my mouth all I could do was scream.

I looked up to see Janice’s face had gone white. Blood first only dripped from her nose, then it began to pour, spouting red all over the front of her shirt and the dashboard. I heard a snap, a crackle, and Janice’s arm was bent in three different ways, white shards of bone stabbing out of her skin.

I jerked the steering wheel and we went into the ditch, I banged my head off the dash but at least we had stopped. I bit my tongue and tried to unbuckle myself but the damn buckle locked, so I was just struggling uselessly while Janice’s body continued to break.

She cried, slumping against the car door as I heard more snaps and pops. Her leg twisted the wrong way around. The way she’d flinch made me think of when I saw someone trying to nurse broken ribs. Any twitch or movement looked agonizing.

Janice looked at me once last time.

“Help me-”

Her neck abruptly snapped to the side, her eyes rolled back, and just like that Janice Meyers was dead.

I finally got loose from the goddamn seatbuckle and threw open the car door, stumbling out as it felt like something was trying to rip its way out of my gut. I collapsed on my hands and knees, the world spinning around me before I heard an audible gurgle from my stomach.

I vomited all over the ground beneath me before I collapsed. The world spun circles around me, round and round like a carousel, and all I could really remember before it all went black was that my vomit was bright pink and smelled of lemonade.

I woke up here. I don’t know where I am. The cement walls hang with circus posters from years past, stretching back to the 1920’s.The lights are sometimes on. They’re usually off. I’m hurrying my writing because I don’t know when they’ll turn off again. Curtains hang from the ceiling, dirty, old, and I swear they change positions whenever the lights come back on. I don’t know. I can’t be sure.

They beat me. Charlie, James. For being teenagers they’re much stronger than they look. James was the instigator, Charlie mostly just shoved me back whenever I tried to make for the door. I think James was supposed to use this paddle the entire time, but he dropped it in favor of his fists, and he didn’t hold back. The lights went on and off, on and off, I must have lost unconsciousness by the time they left. I can’t find the door anymore. I don’t know if it was even there to begin with.

What did I get into

why is Janice dead

what have I done

. . .

I can’t tell if it’s night or day. I found the door again, it was just hiding behind the blue curtain. It’s locked, and I can’t make it budge when I throw myself against it, it must be locked from the outside. I need to conserve my strength.

There’s no food offered. Just fucking. Bottles of pink lemonade lined by the door. They’re mocking me. I’m not going to drink it. It might be poisoned anyway.

I have to get out of here and I can’t brute force it. I have to wait until the door opens again.

. . .

Throat’s so dry. No one’s come through the door.

They’ve left me to die down here haven’t they? Because of the car accident. That’s had to be what happened. A body doesn’t crumple. I must have swerved to avoid something and crashed the car. I’m sorry James. If you read this after I die I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt Janice. I swear. You may have not been in love with Janice but I know she meant a lot to you. I’m sorry to you too Charlie.

Please let me out of here.

. . .

The lemonade’s so refreshing. I had to drink it. It’s so hot in here. There’s no ventilation. I need to keep writing. I don’t know why they didn’t take my journal but it might be my only way to stay sane.

I can’t remember the accident still. I can’t tell if there was one or if really something else did happen in that car. All I recall is Janice’s body looking like a trainwreck.

They have to come in sooner or later. That’s when I can escape.

. . .

No escape. They made the door go away again.

It was James. And Jacob Tanner. And someone else. A magician, maybe? The door disappeared, they were there, and they began my training.

Jacob said they need someone to take Janice’s place. They’re down a clown now, and since it was my fault because I took her too far from the circus, they want me to become a clown.

No shit I told them no. I’m not going to be a fucking clown. I’m a detective. I told them that. Which in response James put a stupid hat on my head and declared me a clown detective before laughing like he told the best joke in the world.

This ‘training’ is just an excuse to torture me. They hand me balls to juggle, whenever I refuse to juggle or dropped them I’d get cuffed in the back of the head or whacked with a paddle. The last time I dropped to the ground I closed my eyes for just a second before I woke back up and everyone was gone.

I keep checking behind every curtain. I can’t find the door. All four walls are blank. I don’t know how but they made the door go away.

They left me a bag of popcorn too. It’s stale as fuck but I needed to eat something.

. . .

I keep begging for their forgiveness. I’ve stopped fighting back. I just want to go home. I won’t tell a soul. No one would believe me anyway.

They just hand me a knife and tell me if I don’t hit the bullseye this time they’re going to break my fingers.

. . .

Am I really alone in here?

Sometimes I think the curtains are hiding someone. I keep sweeping them out of the way, but there’s no one there when I do it. Maybe it’s like the door that keeps disappearing.

When I’m trained, I see them talk to this person sometimes. They turn their head and ask something, I can’t ever really hear it, but they call this person the ringmaster… even Jacob calls him the Ringmaster. I flipped back to check my memory, James is the ringmaster… or maybe he isn’t?

I don’t know anymore. My brain is swimming. They keep calling me Petey. My name is Paul. I’m Paul. Not… not Petey.

Or maybe not Paul anymore. Maybe not.

. . .

The Ringmaster has always been here. Behind the only curtain that’s never torn, she’s watching me. I can’t see her except for her silhouette, where she lounges to overlook my training. I’m too scared to move it, now that I see this room for what it really is.

I’m in a tent. I’m in a circus tent, and my face is smeared with white paint that I don’t think I put on. I’m not sure. I didn’t put in my journal that I put it on. I definitely didn’t keep this stupid detective hat on.

I’m now back in the cement room, but it only looks like that. I know the truth.

I need to pull back her curtain.

. . .

Dixie came to visit me.

She’s such a sweet girl. She yelled at James and told him to be nice to me. She cradled my head and soothed me while I cried in her arms. I told her I wanted to go home, that my name isn’t Petey and it won’t be Petey, and that I won’t be a clown detective.

She told me a story of a girl who no one loved. That no one saw as a girl, but as a thing. An embarrassment, an inconvenience. And how she had climbed to the tippy top of a tall building, all to end her life when she saw the circus lights. She figured, why not spend the last few hours she had on earth at a place that was truly happy?

She told me… that the circus wanted her, and it wants me too. It’s always wanted me. It’s why it let me in. Nothing was accidental.

Dixie left me with a cup of pink lemonade and a spam sandwich with the crusts cut off. The nostalgic taste made me cry.

The curtain needs to go. I need to know why the circus wants me.

Please tell me why I have to stay.

. . .

ha ha

ha ha

well the time has come

to go where the air smells like popcorn and bubblegum

where the tents reach the sky

and we no longer need to cry

this is how I have become a clown

this is how you become a clown

come to the circus that’s here in town

when all you’ve known has burned down

there you will meet an Acrobat, a Juggler, and a Crying Girl

they’ll help you give it a whirl

you’ll be given pink lemonade and all sorts of delights

you’ll begin your training that very night

be sure not to sob when it hurts

you’re just getting your just desserts

to be a clown is to be forever

as long as the circus endeavors

pull back the curtain and meet the Ringmaster

A beauty with skin of alabaster

with cheeks redder than apples candied

she smiles at you and offers you a glass, brandied

you take it, you don’t say no to a woman like that

once you sip, she will give your head a pat

“You’re alone in the world, aren’t you?”

She’ll say, knowing that it’s true

you’ll nod, you don’t attempt to deny

that all this time you’ve just stood by

this world has not been kind

to those who don’t fit into average humankind

“You’ve always been one of us,” she told me

“That girl who died was too carefree,

She never understood what it meant to be a clown

how you should build up, not cut down

that in this circus you’ll never feel harm

that here, you’re always meant to charm

but once you leave, you will be pained

from that, you cannot be unchained

sad that Janice had to die

but come now, you have had your cry

it’s time for you to smile

you have finally passed your trial!

It’s time to become a clown

to your knees and bow down

you are now one of mine

in fact, you have become one of my bloodline!”

I knelt before my Ringmaster, taking her hand

this circus is a family that will never disband

and just like that I’ve become a clown

never again to frown

I hope that you’ll see these tents one day

and come on through the doorway

if you want to become a clown, here’s a tip

get some pink lemonade, have a sip

run away with the circus

and like that, you’ll be one of us!

Ha ha

ha ha

never again to frown

I have become a clown

ha ha ha

ha hah ha hahaha

hahaahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaaa

[hellsdoll]

𝐆𝐄𝐓 FUCKED UP AND DO ᶠᵁᶜᴷᴱᴰ ᵁᴾ SHIT!

「 ＨＥＬＬ＇Ｓ DOLL, SATAN'S 🇵​🇪​🇷​🇫​🇪​🇨​🇹​ LITTLE 𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐋. 」 [ #HELLSDOLL. ] * this is an extremely private and highly selective 🇧​🇦​🇧​🇾​ 🇫​🇮​🇷​🇪​🇫​🇱​🇾​ ( VERA-ELLEN WILSON ) of 𝑅𝒪𝐵 𝒵𝒪𝑀𝐵𝐼𝐸'𝒮 FIREFLY TRILOGY.

taking both influence from music and films. due to the nature of this blog / series i WON'T be following first unless it's another fellow horror / slasher rp blog. otherwise, you'll have to follow me first. i know horror isn't for everyone, therefore i'll keep from following first any blogs not in the horror rpc. 21+ only. [ carrd ] wip.

affiliates: @wrenchist / @mandelavictim / @inhabets * CAPT SPAULDING: @hellsclown

TEMP RULES HERE. please read.

01. i think it's crucial that off the bat i list triggers that may / will be seen here on this blog: CLOWNS / CIRCUS THEMES, SATANIC IMAGERY / RITUALS, TORTURE, VULGAR LANGUAGE, KNIVES, GUNS, GORE, NUDITY, ALCOHOL and MURDER. everything will be tagged accordingly, always. if there is something i missed, let me know! some of these are just listed to be safe.

02. THIS BLOG IS STRICTLY 21+ ONLY. if i see someone follow me with either no age listed or it's under 21? I'm going to block immediately. this is for my own comfort, thank you.

03. as i stated above: if you're not in the horror/slasher rpc then i won't be following you first. i don't want to make anyone uncomfy as i know horror isn't everyone's cup of tea. always feel free to follow me if you're not in the horror/slasher rpc, but just know i won't be doing it first.

04. i'm extremely crossover and original character friendly! so long as you have a rules / brief about then we're golden! i love hearing people ramble about their muses btw.

05. we're here to have fun, i'm busy out of the rpc so i don't stress myself when it comes to writing AS THIS IS A SIMPLE HOBBY FOR ME. be nice to another, i've got no patience for hate of any kind.

[yanderes-galore]

Ooooh another funtime foxy enjoyer!

Can I request headcanons for him? 👉👈

Sure! I'd love to! Funtime Foxy will be depicted as male in this concept. I will also be using the UCN Personality as I thought it made more sense for his usual functionality. If you want the more reclusive persona from the original game let me know.

Animatronic or android/human, does not matter for this concept. Also, no dead kids, but it mentions Funtime Foxy's ability to lure people towards him. I had some trouble with this, hope the concept does something for you 😓

Yandere! Funtime Foxy Concept

Pairing: Romantic/Platonic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Yandere behavior, Kidnapping, Narcissism, Manipulation, Implied death/injury (?)

- Using the UCN persona of Funtime Foxy, he's narcissistic and strict when it comes to his shows in Funtime Auditorium.

- He sounds like a ring master, performing a variety of entertainment for whoever comes to his shows.

- Meeting Funtime Foxy, as how I usually write all my FNAF fics so far, you can either be a guest or a STAFF worker.

- "You're a new face...and right on time! Welcome to the show!"

- The bot even gets irritable when people don't come to his shows.

- To the point he follows others around to rope them into watching his shows.

- You're included, no matter what you're doing.

- "Why didn't you come see my show? ...busy? Nonsense! Everything else can wait. Come! I insist...."

- This Foxy feels all attention should be on him.

- If the bot is somehow fixated on you, it's an absolute must to keep your eyes on him.

- He was originally programmed with that in mind, anyways.

- I've done the STAFF concept for a bit, let's focus specifically on a darling who's a customer.

- As the bot performs, everything goes according to the program.

- You come to Circus Baby's Pizza World as it had opened recently in your area.

- The robots were impressively built.

- They had a robotic clown, robotic dancers, and a fox-based ringmaster.

- "Come one, come all! The show's about to begin!"

- The slightly distorted voice of the ringmaster calls, yellow eyes soon fixing on you.

- You were watching from a distance, debating what robot to watch next.

- "You, there!"

- The voice beckons, you point to yourself in confusion.

- "Yes, you! Come along! You may regret missing my show!"

- Feeling called out you silently scurry over to watch the bot's performance.

- Foxy first introduces himself before performing a variety of tricks.

- The act was clearly meant to be more towards children than your age group, but you didn't mind.

- After the show ends, the crowd disperses to pursue other things to watch.

- You simply sit nearby and eat the rather...dull tasting pizza.

- Maybe things didn't seem that fun because this was a place meant for children, after all.

- "Why do you look so down?"

- The familiar voice of the performer booms.

- You're startled, looking over to see the bot staring at you.

- The robotic tail flicks as he tilts his head.

- "Ah...Um... I just feel out of place here-?"

- "Out of place? Did you come here alone?"

- You refuse to answer, the bot's ears drooping to mimic a sad expression.

- "Oh dear, someone isn't having fun, huh?"

- You go to get up, the ringmaster stopping you.

- "It'll be some time until my next show, but how's this, I'll make a performance just for you!"

- You're stunned.

- "Meaning...?"

- "A private show, just for you!"

- You shake your head.

- "No thanks, erm, Foxy."

- Quickly you speed walk away from the bot.

- Said bot's eyes only watch your movements when you leave the area.

- It felt...irritating to not have your attention towards him.

- To not like his shows....

- His protocol told him not to care, but his actions ignored it.

- The fox-based robot wanted all eyes on him.

- Including yours.

- As the day went on, you were about to head out.

- You've seen all the performances here....

- It was time to head home and....

- "Help!"

- You stop by the door, turning around.

- Was that a child...?

- "Help! It's dark!"

- You should just leave....

- "I can't see...everything hurts!"

- Sighing you decide to make sure everything is okay.

- From what you know of it's almost closing time... maybe someone lost their child?

- You guilted yourself into helping, wandering towards the calls for help.

- They were right...it was dark.

- ...Until yellow eyes filled your vision.

- "There you are! You're just in time for my special performance~"

- No one could hear your muffled screams....

[attemptinghaikyuu]

Joking About Dating A Friend But They Take You Seriously

A/n: woohoo, we’re doing another one babbyyy! I’ll never get tired of these sorts of situations honestly <3

G/n reader

Team Captains (most of them~)

Kuroo Tetsurou

He was walking behind you, about to tap your shoulder, witty conversation starter at the tip of his tongue one he totally hadn’t prepared a day beforehand, only to be hit with you saying “Wow, look at you! A fantastic boyfriend i have indeed.”

Reals back, all thoughts flying out of his head

All internal excitement dissipates as panic and dread take its place

You had introduced Kuroo to the guy you were calling your boyfriend, saying you were only friends and yet…

How come he didn’t know? Him and you were close to each other, right? Had he been so deep into your smiles and pretty eyes that he had misread everything? Maybe he had made up the little signs that meant you felt the same

It was probably his feelings making him a lovesick fool

That thought stuck with him the most because that made him pretty delusional if he got everything this mixed up

He has so many questions rattling in his brain, pinning him down, that he doesn’t realize you’ve turned around and are staring at him

It takes your hand waving back and forth in front of him to startle him out of his trance

His panic doubles, voice strained

“Ahh, hey there kitten. What’s new?”

It’s missing his usual excitement and he sounds strangled, you notice right away that he’s also turned away from you

“Tets are you all good? Are you sick, I could get you some medicine if you aren’t feeling well?”

“What no, I’m not- you don’t have to do any of that, I’m better than I could ever be.” He chuckles and he knows he’s not being convincing in the slightest

“Huh, I’ll get the truth out of you in a sec, I’m gonna say bye to my friend and then we can go, okay?”

“Don’t you mean boyfriend.” It comes out before he can stop himself

The bitter tone is so obvious he’s tempted to bolt, maybe start over as a circus clown

He’s positive he could pull that wig off

Your voice is laced with laughter when you ask if he really does need to go see a doctor

“And what boyfriend?” You pause, smile growing. “Are you talking about yourself or what?”

Now he’s flustered and confused. It’s not like you didn’t talk like that with him but you had a boyfriend now didn’t you or was that..?

“WAIT EARLIER YOU-

He takes a deep breath, he could be wrong, he needs to stay calm

“We’re, we’re you just kidding around when you said your friend was, well ya know?”

You laugh again and explain, slightly embarrassed by the mishap, that yes you were kidding around

He feels all of his confidence come back and asks the question that leads to you two finally dating

“If that’s the case and the spot really isn’t taken, how about I become your boyfriend?”

Bokuto Koutaro

He. Is. Crushed.

Everyone around him can feel the tense atmosphere and looking at his face is like a punch to the gut with his heartbroken eyes, he’s staring at you like you’ve died instead of said you loved your girlfriend

All bokuto had wanted was to give you a quick hug before he headed off to practice

Instead he has to deal with the weight of knowing you’re with someone else, that and the realization that he needs to put away his own feelings so he doesn’t ruin your relationship with the person you love

He had known he liked you for quite awhile, it was hard figuring out a time he should confess or whether that would make you uncomfortable

He’s glad he never tried anything since it saved him from the possibility of making things hard for you, seeing as how you would’ve had to let your friend down

Bokuto looks at you closely, there’s a grin on your face as you stare at her and if you’re happy then he can live with this

That’s what he firmly thinks

And so pulling himself up with a smile, he walks over to you with a solidly convincing amount of energy

He talks excitedly and almost exactly like he would normally

What he’s saying doesn’t sit right with you though

His words are depressing and he looks like he’s forcing himself to talk like this

You stop him in the middle of a joke, that wasn’t all that funny with the sad way it was being told, and ask if he’s okay

His smile gets even bigger, and now you can see it’s clearly fake as he gives you some excuse about training being harder on him lately

You decide to wait and give him a little space, you assume he’ll walk off to volleyball practice, and later you’ll be able to talk with him about whatever’s going on

When he keeps talking and it becomes clear he’s not moving, stalling for time, you ask if you can talk alone with him

“Bo, is um, did something happen? You’re upset aren’t you?” You question him cautiously

“Nope! I’m just glad I get to talk with you, it’s not something I’ll be able to do as often since you have to spend time with your girlfriend and all!”

His smile finally slips as what he said hits you both

You’re quick in explaining the mistake now that you know what’s eating away at him

He can’t believe his luck when he hears you say it was just a joke, it’s too good to be true

But he doesn’t care, he’s just happy

Doesn’t even let himself process it all before he’s asking you to please, think about dating him

You’re both glad his smile is back to normal when you say you’d love to

Kita Shinsuke

Keeps it together like the seemingly impassive and parent friend that he is

Hurts so much more then he wants to admit

Doesn’t want to believe what he just heard but if you say that you have a partner, than those are the facts and he can’t change anything

But shit, does he wish he could

He’s standing right next to you, a step away and if he took it you would be pressed against his side

That’s an impossible reality, a fantasy he needs to put to rest now that he knows your feelings for someone else

That step however, is ungraciously closed when you trip backward from what appears to be your partner moving their foot as you had moved forward, resulting in you falling onto Kita

Instantly flustered by it and is feeling so betrayed by his body when he automatically puts an arm around you to keep you upright

He tries to be respectful as he removes himself from your side, it isn’t right for him to be that close to you, he’ll just have to push down the disappointment he feels from the lack of contact

“Kita-kun! I’m really sorry about that, my friend” you give a pointed glare towards the person of your affection. “accidentally knocked me into you.”

He gives a small smile at you, slightly unsure as to why you would address your partner as just your friend

If he’s being truthful, he doesn’t want to think about it anymore and that’s why he allows himself to shrug off the strange event

He acts like he always does in the next couple days, though the aggressive lilt in his voice that appears at any mistake he spots, gives away his frustration

His feelings are boiling over the surface and he realizes he needs to find a way to get over this

The best way to do that, he concludes, is to tell you his feelings so he can take the rejection and move on

A resolution that he puts into motion the next time he’s with you

He does it simply and tries to make it as small and meaningless as possible

“Thanks for listening to this, I know it must be difficult to deal with.”

You’re speechless and Kita wishes this could be easier but he steels himself for what’s about to come next

“I- Kita, I know you’re not and I apologize in advance, but are you a dumbass?” You’re expression is both mortified and happy and he really doesn’t know what’s happening

“I like you. I was messing around with my friend and I promise you, I will never be doing that again.”

Oh, Kita is so relieved and the first thing he does when you become official is pull you in for a hug

And he’s gonna keep pulling you in for hugs :3

Ushijima Wakatoshi

His surprise is on full display and he ends up staring at you so intensely you automatically come up to ask him what was wrong

Isn’t sure how to put into words how he feels at the moment

You are your own person, so he shouldn’t feel any right to being the one to call you his partner

Yet he can’t stop the disappointment from filling every part of him

Ushijima wants to be mature about this though, If you think that girl is good enough for you then he will live with the heartache

So he shakes his head and comes up with a small excuse for his behavior

He seems normal to most in the following week, quite and stoic, more silent around you than he’s probably ever been but nothing really out of place per say

However his annoyance with your girlfriend only grows when he sees that you are not being treated how most would in a romantic relationship

He’s had enough when he hears her tell you about this pretty girl she saw the other day

She’s all casual and smiles when she says it too

Walks over, taps your shoulder, and asks if you can talk in private

It wasn’t right and he was 100% calm when he explained why he thought you weren’t being treated right

And he definitely wasn’t a little jealous and using the way your girlfriend was acting as a way to see if he could prove he could treat you better

Okay, so maybe he wasn’t being completely rational when he was making his points as to why you should maybe, just possibly reconsider the whole dating your girlfriend thing

But the fact that she hadn’t held your hand was very important and he needed you to know that

He needed you to know that you shouldn’t have to listen to the one you cared for like that, speak of another person they found good looking, especially when the most attractive one was you

Ushijima doesn’t know how to take your silence when he finishes, and you seem… embarrassed?

Had he gone too far? Over stepped a boundary in his jealousy?

He was considering an apology for his rash behavior when you spoke up, though it was more appropriate to call it spoke down with the way you had your head lowered and voice quiet

“Toshi, did you mean all that?”

He’s not sure where this is going, he responds honestly regardless

“Yes, I meant it and I’m sorry if I insulted you.” He doesn’t apologize for insulting your girlfriend tho~

“Then you should probably know that I was only playing around when I said I was dating my friend. We’re not together.” You finally look into his eyes. “I’m pretty single and uh, if you really wanna help me in my dating problems you could date me, that’d fix them all.”

The slightest blush appears on his cheeks and when he reply’s with his yes, it’s almost like a happy sigh

He makes sure to show you how much he loves you everyday, he’s also still slightly bitter around your friend <3

Terushima Yuuji

Freaking out

He is having a hardcore internal screaming sesh

Walks away from you so he can pretend he didn’t just hear that

Also wants to make sure you don’t see him panicking

He finds a place where he’s alone, a field outside the gym he had been in, that is till he’d heard you talk to your boyfriend

Who was apparently, very entertaining if the way you had been laughing was any indication

Stands there, blank for a few seconds

Is so set on not crying over something like this because he knows that you’re amazing and shouldn’t be so surprised over you dating some other dude

He should go back inside and act like he always does, or maybe not since you are with your boyfriend

He’s being stupid, acting this overworked

It’s what he tells himself but he can feel a couple tears slip down his cheeks and there’s a sob bubbling up in his chest against his will

This didn’t feel fair

He wants to do something, he just doesn’t know what

Pretending he’s fine would be a good option if he could stop crying

It’s not looking feasible at the moment however

Takes a shaky breath and is coming to the decision he should leave you alone for now when he hears his name

Someone’s calling him, someone who absolutely cannot see him right now

He starts sprinting, but the thing about crying is that it’s pretty exhausting and before he knows it he’s gasping for breath, too slow to move out of your reach

“Terushima! Why would you-

You stare at his tear stained face, concern pulling your features into a deep frown and he desperately wishes he wasn’t the cause of it

“Hey, what’s wrong?” You ask the question softly, making it all hurt a little more

His eyes are closed when he replies. “Nothing you need to worry your pretty head with.”

“Whatever it is I won’t judge and if you want advice or someone to just listen I’m listening.”

“You, it’s really not..” he breaks. “Are you really with that guy?”

It’s none of his business, why’d he have to ask that?

Understanding lights up your face, and with the new information having connected the dots you move closer to him

“I’m not. He and I were joking, so please don’t cry.” He feels a hand wipe a stray tear from his face

“Would you maybe wanna go out sometime,” you laugh a little. “I hope I didn’t completely misread this, if I did I suppose we’d be matching.. and I wouldn’t mind so much if that was the case.”

He answers by grabbing your hand.

“That answer shouldn’t have been so cute, I’ll forgive you by taking you up on that date though.”

[natromanxoff]

25 - Just Chatting...

Hello one and all.

It's been a long time since I graced these pages and, believe it or not, nothing much has been happening in my life, apart from the odd soiree or two. Winter has finally left us and spring has sprung, and it's nice to see the sun again. Let's start by wishing my old mate a happy birthday and I hope you all had a little drinkie for him, I know I did. In fact I got legless, he would have been proud of me. Whenever we were in London there was always a party at Fred's on his birthday, be it a handful of friends, or one where he invited half of Britain, but which ever one it was there was always a good time to be had and a lot of chaos. One year he actually took over Pikes Hotel in Ibiza and chartered a private plane to fly his friends in. Roger and myself were already on the island recording some of his solo stuff so we didn't have far to travel to the bash. When I say we were working, it's kind of true as we spent a lot of time on his boat "Ga Ga" whizzing around having lunch and fun. The party was held outside around the swimming pool, now is that an invite for trouble or what? There were hundreds of balloons hanging from every available fixture, and of course there is always an idiot that thinks he's a clown. This particular clown, who will remain nameless, decided it would be funny to light one of the balloons, and needless to say the whole lot went up in flames. Phoebe and Crystal to the rescue. We had to get this "fire" off the wooden rafters before the whole hotel went up in smoke, so we were pulling bits of string while burning rubber was dripping down on us. I was so traumatised by the whole event I had to have another drink ....... a lame excuse I know, but hey, it's my story. Back to the pool. Edwin Shirley, of trucking fame and also an all round good guy after a few too many, decided to have a swim, so he removed his clothing and was flapping around the pool when some daft countess told him to get dressed and behave himself. Wrong move lady. Edwin was not impressed by his telling off and threw her in, and she was even less impressed with that and started ranting and raving, much to the amusement to the rest of the party hounds. She left with her tail between her legs and didn't look at all glamorous in her soaking wet dress, running makeup and failed hairdo. We continued till mid morning and went straight to the airport and caught a flight home. Thanks F for the great parties and good times, you will never be forgotten.

I still get asked a lot if I'm gonna write the "Real" story about Queen. Well the answer is no, and the reason is that the guys gave me a great job and a great life and I have far to much respect for them, their wives/girlfriends, children and families to tell the world what we got up to in private. I feel that is our business and ours alone. Most of us are all in relationships and telling tales could make life awkward for a few people, band and crew alike. I'm sure at some point in time someone from the organisation will write a book, have 5 minutes of fame and make a quick buck, but it sure as hell won't be me, and I'll still be able to sleep at night and when I see the guys I will still be free to say, "Wanna beer MATE."

I've had a few questions asked me that I'm gonna answer quickly.

First off is "Do you have any stories about Freddies cats? (ripping furniture etc.)" Here's a good reply, No. So moving right along, "Of all the famous people you've met, who impressed you the most?" Tricky one this. After years in this "Biz" they all become "Just normal people," and some become good pals, but on one occasion I was in Paul McCartneys studio and I was handed his violin bass and I was sitting there holding it when someone said, "Paul is left handed, hold it like he would." When I turned it around, still taped in the cutout was the Beatles set list from their days in Hamburg, now that impressed me.

Deaky and myself were the only two reggae lovers in the outfit, and Bob Marley turned up to see the show at Madison Square Gardens. Strange choice of show for Bob, but he loved Another one bites the dust, and he happened to be in New York on a stopover on his way to Germany for laser treatment. Show time and our intro tape was playing, and someone told JD that Bob was in the audience, so he cranked his bass up and played "Lively up yourself" over the tape. This was very possibly the last time Marley ever heard this played as he died shortly after. I didn't get to meet him, but I did get to meet Tyrone Downie, Bobs keyboard player in the Wailers, and Tyrone and myself got up to all sorts of mischief that night. RT on the other hand hates reggae music, but I did manage to drag him to the Circus Krone in Munich to see Peter Tosh. I loved it, he hated it. I look at this as payback because years before he insisted that I went to Hammersmith Odeon to see Laurie Anderson, of O Superman fame. This show he loved, but I put it alongside Cher as one of the worst concerts I have ever seen. Needless to say I have also met a couple of stars that I didn't see eye to eye with. Like the American rock star we encountered in a club one night, and he was such a pain I had to take him into the toilets to have a quiet word with him. He finally got the message so I released my hand from around his neck and let him drop back down to the ground. To finish this segment I wanna tell you something that Bev Bevan said. Bev was the drummer with ELO, and them and us were touring the US at the same time, and as it turned out, staying in the same hotel in one city. Roger and myself were leaving the hotel and waiting for the elevator. When the doors opened Bev was in there and him and RT said their hellos. Rog then said, "Bev, this is Crystal, he looks after me." Bev turned to me, shook my hand and said, "Pleased to meet you. If it wasn't for guys like you, guys like us wouldn't be where we are today." He didn't need to say that, and was genuine when he did. I wasn't impressed with meeting him, but he is certainly in my top ten of nicest people I have ever meet.

Over the last few months I've spent a lot of time in the Chatroom, and I highly recommend it to you all as it can be a bit of a laugh. For anyone who has never visited the room please remember a couple of things, if you come in and start swearing you will be kicked out. I know, it happens to me all the time. Also don't come in and start going on about knowing axemen and murderers and other such garbage, cause that also warrants a kicking. Some buffoon from Ireland, who went by the name of "Death" turned up with an attitude and was going on about how f***ing awesome Queen were at Slane Castle. He was not known by anyone in there so I asked him to watch his language. He said he was the Grim Reaper and could do and say what he liked, so I told him otherwise and he was most put out when I kicked him. What a fool. A while ago there was some prat who called himself F***queen, good name eh! Anyway, he/she/it was picking on a lovely young lady called Raisa, and was saying some awful things to her and completely freaked her out, so I went to her defence and FQ turned the attention my way. As far as I'm concerned it's only letters on a screen and it didn't phase me at all, but at least he/she/it gave up on Raisa. In all fairness to FQ, whoever you may be, he/she left a message on the Bulletin Board saying sorry to Raisa and myself and would never do it again. So FQ, from the both of us, thanks for the apology, we accept it. What other weirdos have we had? Well, there was a brightspark who decided it would be funny to use the nickname QueenRshite, another bad move from this person who was honoured with a ban.

While in there I've seen a lot of friendships made, and a couple that have fallen apart. I got a private message one evening from a very drunk girl who, how shall we phrase this, offered me her body and wanted to do all sorts of naughty things to me, I thanked her and declined...must be getting old or something. I have also witnessed relationships being made and, usually there is a lot of humour involved, but needless to say some arguments do occur. I have also seen some of the daftest things said. One guy was so convinced that one of the regulars was either Deaky or she was chatting with him in private that he actually started tracking her every move on the net. He also told me about some highly illegal activities he was up to concerning the band. I wouldn't have thought I was the best person to tell such stuff to, and needless to say I had a go at him. Just to add to his stupidity he's been recently boasting about his affair with an underage girl, and I reckon if he had any more sense he would be half witted. Having mentioned all the twits I'd like to say a quick hello to all the regulars, White Queen and Killer Queen, the lovely girls Blue Rock and Rannnnnnni, SQJan, Mayflower and her boys, Farookh (aka Leroy Brown) MarshMallow, the three Tigers - Babe, Lily and Stripes and the mighty Falc, also to all the rest who I haven't mentioned by name, you know who you are. I'd also like to say hi to Daddy Cool who is the singer in the Dutch cover band Miracle, and Dad, if you never make it as a singer you could make a great career from being a stand up comedian. Finally an extra special hello to the gorgeous MTB, who is about to make an honest man of me ;)

Before I go I'm sure I don't need to remind anyone of a certain date in November that is engraved in all of our minds. And I know that a lot of you will be heading to Garden Lodge to leave flowers. I don't wanna preach and tell you what to do, and I know flowers are a nice gesture, but they do die and the only people to really benefit from this is the florist. This year lets all give a donation, no matter how small, to Aids research, this way the cash will be used to try and stamp out this awful disease. If you really wanna leave flowers, buy a smaller, cheaper bunch and donate the balance of what you would have spent to these charities. It's been said a million times before but it is true, Every penny counts.

As always, Loadsa Love.

Crystal

[ladyyatexel]

Here is the YuGiOh State of Things, I guess? If you want to know what I have consumed and what I like.

Duel Monsters: In my heart, this is the only one that's actually Yu-Gi-Oh, haha. The others are just like, shows named whatever their subtitle is. I saw some of the dubbed anime in highschool, but mostly read the manga. When I decided to come back to this franchise this year, the manga is where I went. I also watched a decent amount of the anime before deciding it wasn't worth it to keep going because they fucked over Ryou Bakura, haha. I watched enough to know I love Bakura's voice as Rica Matsumoto and the 'Passionate Duelist' music cue. Also love Bakura voice in "Season 0", which I have also not seen all of, but I read the maaaanga, so it's enough, pretty much. My feelings and things I like and how I see them in this are all based on subtitled Japanese episodes and reading the translated manga.

My favorites are Ryou Bakura and Malik Ishtar, can you fucking believe it? I know this must be a shock. I think this has... probably been elaborated on or demonstrated enough that I don't need to go into detail about this. I also really like Ryuji Otogi. Mai is also very good. Yugi is sweet and good, actually.

And then this collection of spinoff nonsense. I did not ever want to watch any of these. I decided to watch one a few months ago because it was just fun to talk to the group of people I was hanging out with and they were talking about good boys dealing with trauma, and uh, that's a thing I like, so I said, fine, I'll watch one (1) spinoff. I chose ...

Arc V: Baby's first spinoff. (This sentence has foreshadowing in it. See if you can guess what it was.) I fucking love the first theme song. I listen to that daily. A thing I also love is this protagonist. I love tomato clown boy Yuya Sakaki. I feel more fond of him as a character than I almost ever feel for protagonists of a show? I'm a 'not fully developed side character' kinda bitch usually. The ending to this one was a hot mess, and I had a lot of Concerns and Questions about the ultimate fate and okayness of the counterpart Yu kids and bracelet girls, but I loved Yuya's tour of significant dueling. I found the duels so much more entertaining in this than any other anime versions of duels I'd had to sit through because Yuya spends all of his running around and bouncing off walls rather than standing yelling at the guy across the way. Also liked his top hat bow tie wearing circus animal monsters.

But speaking of monsters, holy fuck I love Sora Shiunin. The cute stuff that turns out to be just nightmares? Toys and violence? Unhinged desperate motivations that turn into real character development?? Sincere friendship with main male and female characters?? Fucking hell, I love Sora. Sora Sora Sora SORA.

I purchased keychains of Sora and Yuya. Did not expect to care about spinoff media at all, let alone enough to make A Purchase. So that's something.

ALSO GIRLS! They were real characters! For a while, Yuzu was doing more protagonist plot duty than Yuya, and she has her own duels and motivations that aren't jokes. I really liked her, actually, and I was shocked to find myself able to enjoy multiple girls in a franchise that is Bad At Them.

ALSO DENNIS. I FUCKING LOVE DENNIS. I can't believe his name is fucking Dennis, but I LOVE HIM.

I really enjoyed watching this and found myself missing the characters when I was done watching - which I liveblogged on a Discord server. I was real funny, thanks.

Then I got asked when I was gonna liveblog another one, with people pitching the ones they wanted to see me watch and comment on. Some shit happened on the public server I did all this on and I didn't want to liveblog there again, so I moved it to a private one. Where I have been going through...

GX: I'm early in the final season. I suffer from this show suffering from straddling the line between 'these are fucking cards' and 'this is magic that can kill you.' It feels more absurd than the original because it's still trying to operate in both real and fantasy world and it's kinda mostly not working for me because of it. i admittedly had a friend steer me over the episodes that weren't plot and were just 6000 year long duels. Me yelling about how much it is struggling between 'real life cards' and 'incomprehensible magic' aside, I had a really good time with the third season. Felt sad they thought they needed to bring in an entire new cast, though. Even as I loved some of those characters.

I liked a lot of the Yubel stuff? But I felt like a lot of it was needlessly drawn out and then it concluded too quickly? I don't know how I feel about it all, but I loved the effect of the voice drifting between styles/genders.

Did you know there are two plot-important and extremely capable awesome black guys with great looking natural hair shapes in Yu-Gi-Oh? Yeah, I didn't either. (Can't imagine why...) But they are both fantastic, so fucking shout outs to Kenzan and O'Brien, I love them.

I think my favorite is Manjoume. Which only happened after they sent him to the north pole and rolled him in garbage. Once he became proper trash, I loved him. Wish they'd let him keep the entirely trash monster deck from that one episode. Fucking dragons are so boring, blaaaaah

Shocking how much more I liked Judai once Johan showed up. Seems like he really needed what Johan had to offer. I like them as a pair very much. I like Johan's monsters as much as I really don't like Judai's, haha.

Anyway, I haven't finished that. I was not having fun in Season 2 (my friends were assuring me it would be worth it), but I really enjoyed Season 3. Dunno how we're feeling about Season 4. But I'm not nearly so motivated to watch it? That might mean nothing.

While I was doing THIS, the other spinoff people had been begging me to liveblog was...

ZeXal: I kinda... don't like this one. We have watched most of the first half. I've been watching it with my friends on Discord, and so it's kinda fun to watch with running commentary, but the only characters I really like are not showing up often or being really developed. I'm bored, I don't like the protagonist or his monsters, I'm not finding characters I care about. Tron's family is the most interesting thing going on. I'm missing something that is making the rest of my group go nuts with love about this one. I don't think I'd still be watching if it wasn't the group watch project.

I like III and IV and Tron and like, most of Shark. Actively can't stand the female characters, who just yell in distress and/or hit people out of nowhere in an overblown display of jealousy. I'm so tired of that shit. Kinda why I stopped watching a lot of this sort of thing ages ago.

Anyway, much like GX, I'm told the second half of this show is just OMG SO MUCH BETTER, so perhaps my feelings will change.

I don't want to watch 5Ds. I hated the motorcycle parts of Arc V, I don't want to see any more of that.

Sevens is full of characters too young, designs and a style I don't like. So Vrains is the only left that is a possibility. It's actually the one I wanted to watch based on the first pitches from the Discord server after my Arc V liveblogging, and I really love Arc V, so I'm curious if the ones that sounded appealing to me alone will continue to be the ones I enjoy the most. WE WILL PROBABLY SEE. LE SIGH.

But there you go, that's what I have seen and what I have enjoyed.

[ellana-ravenwood]

“Can you be my dad’s girlfriend, please ?” - Bruce Wayne x Fem!Reader (x Batkids)

I was just thinking about the kids’ experience in school, being both part of the Wayne family and everything it brings AND a vigilante...and this story just came to be. I hope you will like it : 

Fair warning : this is very long. I hope you will not find it boring. The subject interested me, and I wanted to write a slow burn story for ages. And here we are.  

My master list : @ella-ravenwood-archives

__________________________________________________

                                                      ******

DICK.

"Are you sure about this, Dick ?"

"Yeah, I am.”

The boy looked sure of himself alright, but Bruce couldn’t help and be a little worried, faced with the building’s decrepitude, and the general state of the neighborhood. Of course, he himself would never care about that, but this didn’t concern him per se.

It wasn’t about his safety, but Dick’s.

Bruce Wayne could wish to change Gotham all he wanted, do everything in his power to make living in this city better, and hope for progress...He wasn’t an idiot.

He knew his work just started, and that most of the city was still very much unsafe. And Dick went through so much already...

Was enrolling him in this school the right choice ?

“You know, Gotham Academy is currently the best rated school in the city ? And it’s closer to the Manor, not by much, but still...It’s also closer from Wayne Tower, just in case.”

Dick frowned, and Bruce could see that he was going to say something before he could truly think about it. His little ward was very impulsive, at times. And sure enough, Bruce was right, as Dick turned to him and started vehemently :

"It's full of phonies and not payed enough frustrated teachers who are mean to kids because they were born rich ! I mean, some of those kids totally deserve it, being phonies and all, but there’s many that are just normal nice kids with rich parents ! I can’t learn with a teacher who hates teaching. And the phonies are getting to me now, mocking me because I was in the circus...And it’s harder to fit in when you go home and are not in the boarding school part ? Most of them are in boarding school, and were jealous I could go home. And I don't care about the "prestige" everyone was always talking about. I don’t go to school to appear better than I am, I go there to learn !”

There’s a short silence, during which Bruce feels a pang of guilt in his heart.

Other kids were mocking him ? The teachers weren’t nice ? Why did Dick wait three months into the school year to tell him he wasn’t feeling well in that environment ? Was he not feeling comfortable enough around him yet ? It has only been six months since he started to live with him, after all..

Bruce tried his best to make him feel at home at the Manor, but it proved, at times, to be more difficult than anything he ever did in his life.

And this was coming from a man who went to train all over the world for years, enduring impossible trials after impossible trials. None of his training though, prepared him to raise a kid. Thanks god Alfred was always there to help him out when he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do.

And the more he thought of it, the more Bruce realized that putting Dick in the fanciest school of the City might not have been the best move...

“Do-Do you um, care about the prestige ?"

Dick asks, breaking the silence, looking up at Bruce shyly.

It was clear in the little boy’s eyes, he was very worried about what Bruce was thinking right now. And that the short silence after his passionate diatribe made him nervous. Because...Maybe Bruce would disagree with him ?

Maybe knowing the reason Dick wanted to change from private school to a "normal" public school in would make him angry ? Offend him ?

After all, Gotham Academy was very much like the school Bruce went to as a youngster (said school blew up a few years prior after an “accidental” gaz leak).

Looking at the boy’s almost panicked face, Bruce reassured him quickly :

"Of course not chum. I want you to be happy and feel comfortable in whatever school you choose. If you want to go to this one, then you're going to this one. I was just making sure everything was truly ok with you."

"Well it is ! I have friends here, people that came to-to the circus, you know ? Kids I met during intermissions and all that.  Back in the other school, people, and not just the kids, the teachers too, made fun of me because I was in a circus ! Always talking about how I probably was uneducated and all. Bruce, They kept saying I was a clown when I was an acrobat !"

Once again, Bruce felt his heart tightening in guilt and sadness. Three months. The kid waited THREE MONTHS, enduring mockeries and not feeling well, before saying something ! And he only said said something after Bruce kinda forced him to talk about his feelings...

Which had been a very laborious process. Dick was a stubborn child, and Bruce wasn’t really the best person when it came to the concept of “opening up”. Eventually though, he finally got an answer out of the kid.

It wasn’t going well at school, which is why he was being angrier and angrier, and lashed out even more often than when his...The subject of parents was sort of taboo, right now.

Nonetheless, Bruce observed a clear improvement in Dick’s mood and behavior over the Summer. Being with him made the boy more cheerful, and like his entire world still had some sense. Like he wasn’t all alone. When Bruce thought back to his own childhood, and the months after his parents’ death, he truly realized how much Alfred helped him go through everything.

And he wanted to be that person for Dick. It succeeded, as the boy opened up more and more, and was starting to smile again. Be snarky and sassy, too, which Bruce could definitely do without (or not).

When school started however, he went back to a morose like attitude and it didn’t take a genius to understand something must be up..

And here they were, in front of a completely normal school in the Otisburg District, Uptown Gotham. Not the worst neighborhood, most definitely not the best.  

Dick said he knew people that went to this school, and that’s why he chose it. And today was his first day. Even though he was a rather extroverted child, Bruce could tell he was nervous.

Made sense, it’s not easy, being the “new kid”.

Laying his hands on the boy’s shoulders, Bruce gave them a light squeeze he hoped felt reassuring, and said :

“Well, buddy. Should we go in ?”

************

This was one of the most stressful day of your life.

No. Second most stressful day. The worst one was most definitely about a week after you graduated college, all cheerful and happy about the prospect to start teaching ! You were riddled with enthusiasm and willingness to change the World, give kids a chance annnnnnnd...realized that day finding a teacher’s position where you wanted was difficult.

Because of sentimental reasons, you did not want to leave Gotham. This city had been your home all your life, and you just couldn’t envision yourself teaching anywhere else.

The city was big, but there wasn’t that many schools, in the end. Or at least, not enough teacher jobs available. None at all, in fact. Well, in the schools you wanted to work at.

There was work in the few private schools all around the city, but you didn’t want to be a teacher in such a place.

You grew up in a bad neighborhood of Gotham (which wasn’t telling much, since most neighborhood in Gotham were “bad” at the time), and you were certain that it was only thanks to the best sixth grade teacher you’ve ever had that you didn’t turn bad.

Out there, in the street of GC, it was so easy for kids from disadvantages families to fall into petty crimes. There wasn’t really a lot of prospect for those kids, with no money to continue their studies and nowhere to really go.

Eventually, a lot of petty crimes turn into organize crimes and...Well, you were sure that one of Gotham’s root problem was their bad public schools.

You swore to yourself that when you’d become an actual teacher and have your own class, you’d advocate a lot to the city council to have a bigger budget, and give a real chance to kids from the lower neighborhoods !

But right now, after three months of not being able to find any steady work in the area you wanted (only short subbing times), and almost accepting a position at Gotham Academy...You finally found a job (well, at least you think you did) and were waiting nervously in front of the principal’s office for him to give you a class !

You didn’t know yet which one you’d get, and it made you extremely nervous ! The entire ordeal was settled really fast, and just enhanced your stress because you had barely any time to prepare. And since you didn’t know which class you’d have, you prepared for any grade you could have in an elementary school (because yes, you were an elementary school teacher. You were sure that trying to lead kids the right way had to start from an early age, as so many of them, in Gotham, just quit school before the age of 15...).

The day before today, you received a call from a panicked principal in the Otisburg district, talking about one of his main teacher quitting after she got mugged for the 7th time that month (it was particularly hard for her because she was originally from Metropolis, so not used to all this violence...), and he was in desperate need to find someone to fill her spot ! The principal’s words particularly resonated within you, since she was saying that those kids, given their circumstances, couldn’t afford to miss a few days of school.

It could have terrible consequences. Which is why she called you (you remember perfectly well that principal, and couldn’t help, when she hung up the phone, to feel utterly giddy because...she was running one of the school you wanted to go the most to !).

But then you realized she didn’t tell you which class the quitting teacher had, or if the spot would be “regular” of if it was yet another subbing time for you...

And here you were, waiting in front of her door, stressing the hell out. And oh my god WHY did you came an hour earlier ?! It just enhanced your stress. 

Next to you, there was a trash can full of the espresso you got from the machine in the empty teachers’ room. All this caffeine running through your blood system surely didn’t help you relax.

You were about to take yet another walk around the school to try and release some tension when...

**********

“Can we get ramen for dinner ?”

“I’m not against it chum, but I believe we’ll hurt Alfred’s feelings if we come back for the fourth night in a row with take away.”

“Oh. Right. Then maybe he can make ramen ?”

“I’m sure he’d learn for you.”

“Can you call him so he’ll do it for tonight ? I really want ramen. I miss it..”

“Dick, we ate ramen the past four nights.”

“But it’s so good ! Pleaaaaaase Bruce please please please ask hiiiiiim ?!”

“Alright alright alright. I’ll call him after the meeting ok ?”

“YES !”

Half-standing half-sitting, as you were about to leave for yet another walk, you noticed two persons coming your way, and caught a little part of their conversation.

A man and a boy, probably his son. The little one was jumping up in the air, fist bumping the nothingness, clearly happy about the prospect to eat “ramen”. As they both came closer to you, you realized that...

“Ah, mister Wayne ! I see you’re here too, Miss (Y/L/N), good good. Perfect timing.”

You jump in the air, surprised by the sudden appearance of the principal. Was she a ninja or something, to open her door so stealthily and just appear out of thin air ?! 

The thought made you smile, because honestly, in Gotham City ? It was a possibility that the principal of this little school was an assassin of some sort...You stopped your mind from inventing stories about a famous ninja acting as an elderly school principal as a cover, and being one of the most prolific hitman of Gotham at night, and turned to her.  

Why was it, that your imagination always ran the wildest at the worst moments ? Right now, you were about  to have your first briefing at your first teacher job ever, in the company of the famous Bruce Wayne, and you were thinking about ninjas and whatnot ! WHY ?!  

You smile awkwardly at her, and walk into her office, wondering now why a man like Bruce Wayne was here. 

According to TV and diverse newspaper, he was a few years older than you, and after everyone thought he died long ago, came back out of nowhere to take his place back in the city’s life just a few months ago. 

Why was he here ?

Wasn’t he supposed to be a billionaire who was gonna “turn Gotham around” ? A rush of excitement suddenly filled you. Was he-Was he getting interested in helping schools out ?! 

************ 

That little boy who was with Bruce Wayne, it was “Richard Grayson”. You read his story in the paper, what terrible tragedy...Made worst by the fact it was the only news going around in Gotham for quite a while. 

Turned out though, the papers and other media missed one hell of a headline... Their beloved Bruce Wayne adopted the kid ! And no one talked about it ! Your guts were telling you that the reason why this was kept a secret was the man himself. You didn’t know him, but he most definitely seemed like the kind of person who would make sure no further stories about a poor defenseless little boy would surface all around the city. 

“So as I was saying, perfect timing ! I thought, mister Wayne, a man of your stature might want to meet your son’s teacher first ? Well here she is ! Miss (Y/N/L) ! She’s starting at our school today too, and will teach the third graders.” 

Bruce cleared his throat, and looked at you worriedly. Wow, rude. You didn’t quite know why, but your guts were telling you again this Bruce guy wasn’t very convinced about you right now. 

“Um, how old is miss (Y/N/L) ?”

You raise an eyebrow, and answer before the principal can : 

“Miss (Y/N/L) is 23, almost 24. Why, is that a problem ?”

“Um, no no. I mean...Maybe. I was under the impression Dick was going to be in the class of someone who had a lot of experience being a teacher ?” 

WOW ! RUDE ! You turned an outraged face to him, and he avoids your eyes. The little one though, “Dick”, looks at you apologetically and elbows his gardian in the ribs. 

“Can I ask you something mister Wayne ? Do people tell you the same thing when they realize you’re about my age and are raising a child right now ?” 

Bruce turns to you, and...Oh you hit the bullseye. 

“I think I have every right to ask about your experience, as I’m about to leave my child in your care.”  He says coldly, and oh you just want to punch him. You knew he got the analogy, and maybe you were a bit out of line but come on, he was too.

You were about to answer something, and was ready to get fired before you even started school as you knew you were going to put the richest man in Gotham back to his place, when the principal said : 

“I can assure you miss (Y/L/N) is the person we need ! When she came to leave her curriculum vitae a few months ago, I just had hired Miss Hick, who quit. Poor woman, she was from Metropolis, you know ?” 

Both you and Bruce nod knowingly. The principal continues : 

“In any case, I almost regretted that I hired Miss Hick when I saw miss (Y/L/N). Let me tell you mister Wayne, I can assure you that she’s really the person this school needs ! She came out top of her class from school, and clearly has the passion to teach ! She might not have a lot of experience yet, but I think both the kids and her can grow a lot because of this. I’m a very gutsy person you know ? I can have a “feel” of people, know what they’re worth...It’s the part of me that was raised in the Bowery, you know ? Well in any case, from all the things I know about her, and the many letters of recommendations I had from schools where she had internships or subbed, she’s the perfect person for the job. And you, mister Wayne, I feel like you’re a reasonable man...Give her a chance, will you ?” 

************

Well, this was interesting.

Sure, your first impression of Bruce Wayne wasn’t very good, but you had to admit that the way he seemed worry about his ward kinda warmed your heart. 

It wasn’t very nice, to be questioned about your ability because you were young. But you could understand where he was coming from. And you kinda started to feel guilty about lashing out, and talking about his own legitimacy to raise a child. 

Since when was hurting someone because they hurt you the right solution ? You knew better... 

“I’m sorry.” 

Oh ? Haha. You both talk at the same time, as you close the door to the principal’s office, raising your heads to look at each others. 

You were both clearly feeling ashamed, and were looking down at the floor, when you decided to apologize. At the same time. And so you both start to laugh. Under the gaze of little Dick, who is most likely thinking : “What the Hell ? Adults are so weird.”, given his confused expression. 

“I’m very sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude or anything. It’s very unlike me, I assure you. It’s just, I want Dick to...Be alright.” 

He says, smiling shyly at you. And you can’t help but thinks this is probably not a look people are used to see on Bruce Wayne’s face. 

“No no no, I’m the one who is sorry. Your concern was totally receivable, and I didn’t really help my case by being an as-um,  very immature right afterward.”

“Well, let’s start all over, alright ? I’m Bruce Wayne. And this is my ward, Dick. He’s going to be your student this year.”

“I’m (Y/N) (Y/L/N), I’m um...Going to be your ward’s teacher.” 

“Well, a pleasure to meet you miss (Y/N/L). I’m sure we’ll see a lot of each others, in this coming years.” 

He tells you with a charming smile. And you try to pack in your brain all the rumors about him being a womanizer, to try and take away how attractive he is. How handsome, sure. But also how his voice is deep and soft to the ear, and how he genuinely seemed to care about his kid in that short meeting...You almost forget his rudeness. Well. He did apologize.  

“Pleasure to meet you too, and I’m sure we will.” 

Bruce shook your hand, and crouched down to be at Dick’s eye level. He put a hand on his head and said : 

“Well chum, see you tonight ?” 

“Yup !” 

There’s a short silence, and you can see Bruce wants to say more but is searching for his words. Finally, he says : 

“Are you going to be ok ?” 

The boy smiles widely, and nods enthusiastically. Bruce gives him a worried smile, and after ruffling his hair stands up, and leaves. But not without turning around one last time, as he’s about to disappear at the corner of the corridor, and waving at his boy. Dick waves back, and puts his thumbs up. 

Everything was going to be ok ! 

************

Nothing was going to be ok ! 

What was Dick doing ? He should’ve said to Bruce he was really scared and worried about starting everything over in this new school ! He was pretty sure that if he had, Bruce would’ve taken him with him to work, and give him time to not be afraid anymore. 

Bruce was like that. Always caring about his feelings first. He would probably homeschool him if he wanted...but that’s not what Dick wanted. Although he was thinking about it right now.

He did want to go to a normal school. And see the friends he made while in the circus. And have good teachers (this miss (Y/N/L) sounded great). But it was still scary ? 

Dick could act as if he was confident and outgoing all he wanted, he was still an eight (almost nine) year old boy who was about to be thrown into an unknown environment. Not very reassuring. He was thinking...

“I’m nervous too, you know.” 

“Huh ?”

“This is the first class i’m going to teach as an actual teacher, and not just a substitue teacher. It’s very nerve wracking. I’m also about to meet a whole lot of new people, that’s always a bit scary, right ?”

“Right.” 

The boy answers, feeling his nervousness slowly fading away, as you smile at him reassuringly. It kind of reminds him of how Bruce would talk about his own problems to relate to his, which always helped him understand things more. 

It helped him greatly, when he thought about his parents, and Bruce told him about his...

“Let’s make a deal. If I feel like I’m going to freak out, I’ll say “banana”, and you’ll make a diversion so I can escape ok ? And if you feel like you’re about to freak out, ask me if you can have some bananas and I’ll make something up so you can go in the corridor to regain some countenance ok ?” 

“...Bananas ?” 

“Ok, ok banana maybe isn’t the right word. What about...”

Oh god, the kid was most definitely thinking you were crazy, right ? You were trying to find a way to actually make him feel comfortable, and tell him it was ok if today become too overwhelming and he needed to take a break from all this novelty. Oh geez if you couldn’t make one child feel ok, could you even hold a full classroom ?! 

“What about saying we need to go to the bathroom ? Everyone needs to go to the bathroom at one point.” 

“Oh, brilliant idea Dick ! So, if we both feel like things are too much, our escape plan will be the bathroom...ok ?” 

“Ok !” 

The boy answers excitedly, and you feel a sudden wave of relief. Ok. Good. Mission accomplished. He was clearly not feeling as nervous anymore. And you ? Well, this little victory calmed you down quite a bit as well. 

Still though, as you pushed the door to your classroom and was met with all your new students, you felt like saying you needed to go to the bathroom right away... 

************

When Dick came home that night, he wore the widest smile Bruce saw him wear for a long time. And oh, oh he was so excited to talk about what he did that day.

************

“Miss (Y/L/N), Miss (Y/L/N) !” 

Dick calls you across the corridor, as the rest of the children exit the school to go home. It’s the end of today’s lessons, and you’re exhausted. You can’t wait to go home, but you never really mind doing some extra hours to answer a kid’s question. 

Especially when said kid is Dick Grayson. 

Of course, you’re not playing favorites in your class, oh no no no you would never...But you liked that kid. 

Dick walks to you, and waits a few minutes for the corridor to empty out. And then he looks up at you, and as if it was the most evident question in the World, he says : 

“Can you be my dad’s girlfriend ?” 

For the first time in ages, you can feel your face growing hotter, all the way up to your ears. You spit the coffee you were drinking, and you turn to the little boy who just asked you the cutest question ever, that also made you highly uncomfortable.  

“Um uh I um uh...What ?” 

You totally blank. You. The person who spend her entire days answering kids’ questions, no matter how weird and kinda useless. And here you were. Completely unable to say anything. 

“Can you be my dad’s girlfriend ?” 

There another short pause, where you just stare at the boy and he stares back, not flinching one bit. And then there’s a sudden light in his eyes, as if he just understood something, and adds : 

“Please ?” 

And it kind of melts your heart, how he thinks you weren’t answering because he wasn’t being polite. Trying to choose your words carefully, you say : 

“What brought this up ?” 

You knew that asking their thought process first, could help you greatly understand a child. 

“Well, you’re great and pretty and nice and the best teacher I ever had and he needs to be taken care of. You take great care of us !” 

“Dick, your dad isn’t a child anymore..” 

You smile at all the compliments the boy gave you. How sweet and innocent. You also smile at him calling Bruce his “dad”. 

As the school year unfolded, you saw a shift in Dick’s behavior. A good shift. He opened up more and more, and it was obvious he was slowly finding a new family again, without forgetting the one he lost. 

You actually thought Bruce’s approach to tell him he could call him whatever he wanted, and that Dick’s parents would probably just want for him to be happy, and would be happy themselves he wasn’t alone...Was very cute. 

You talked about it with him in a parent/teacher meeting. Of course, you had said meeting with all “your” kids’ parents. Not just Bruce. Um. 

“I know he isn’t ! Though believe me he acts like one sometimes. But I’m saying that because...I think he’s lonely ? And sad ? Sometimes it feels like he’s just not with us you know ? I don’t know how to explain it, I don’t have the words to...” 

Oh but you see exactly what Dick means. You noticed it too. Sometimes, Bruce, when he thought no one was looking, had this melancholic look in his eyes, as if lost in his own dark world indeed. 

Not that you saw Bruce THAT often. I mean, just like you saw the other students’ parents really. After all, the school this year really worked on involving the parents more. You and the principal really had the same ideas, and you thought that getting the parents right into the student’s school life was vital for a good development. 

“Dick, you know you can’t just become someone’s girlfriend like that ?” 

“Sure you can ! I asked Rose McDowell yesterday if she’d be my girlfriend, and she said yes ! It’s simple, you have to ask and then you’re in love.” 

You smile at how sweet this child simplified vision of love is, and say : 

“Adults are complicated, Dick. We can’t just fall in love by asking someone if they want to be our girlfriend or boyfriend. We have to go on dates, and know each others, and such things ?” 

“But miss, you know my dad. If you’re not sure about something, ask me ! I know everything about him, and if I don’t, then Alfred must know !” 

Again, you smile at how easy that little boy seems to find solutions to any problems. And oh you wished it was that simple. 

“This isn’t how it works, Dick. You have to have feelings for each others, too.” 

“Well, I know he likes you !” 

You feel your heart jump in your chest, and a rush of excitement...Until you realize. “Simplified answers and solutions”. And thinking he loves little Rose. Dick clearly does not know what “likes” truly mean, and might mix up friendship feelings with love. 

After all, it was true you and Bruce got along. Strictly in a...teacher/parent kind of relationship of course. Let’s just say Bruce Wayne agreed with your kind of teaching. Not every parents saw eye to eye with your “fun” methods and such. 

So in the eye of a kid, agreeing with each others might seem like this “like” feeling. But really, there was NO way a man like Bruce Wayne would be interested in someone like you. 

You saw the models he dated at charity balls and other galas. It never lasted long, and he had much less flings since he officially adopted Dick, but you still saw how they looked and such. Why, when he had such options, would he go for a plain elementary teacher like you ? 

“Dick, I don’t think he likes me in the way boyfriends like their girlfriends, do you understand what I mean ?” 

“There’s more than one way to like a person !?” 

The boy seemed blown away by that, and you can’t help but smile once again his innocence :

“Of course there is. You don’t like Bruce the same way you like Rose, right ? Or your friend Harry ?” 

Quick connections seem to be made in his little head, and he nods slowly. But oh horror, his shoulders flop down dejectedly, and he looks sad now. You don’t have time to try and find a way to make him understand everything is alright as he says : 

“So you don’t like him ? I mean, like like him ?” 

Smart boy. He understood fast that there were indeed a difference between love and friendship. Or at least, he understood the concept of it. You smile and you say : 

“No buddy, no I don’t like like him.” 

It’s a blatant lie, but sometimes, for a child’s own good, a lie is the best solution. 

Because even if by some miracle Bruce Wayne “liked liked” you, he was still one of your student’s parent. When you were in college, one of your teacher hammered in your head that it was highly unethical to date a student’s parent, and this principle just stuck in there. 

No. No way. You could never date Bruce Wayne. Because even if he liked you back (back ?) the fact was, he’d forever be one of your student’s parent, even the day Dick would go to the next grade...

************

Dick moves on to the fourth grade, and it’s quite painful to let go of this very first class you’ve ever taught. Those kids that help you grow as a teacher, as you lead them on the path of knowledge. 

For an entire year, you all learned from each others, and it’s with a heavy heart you see those children moving on to the next class, as you welcome new kids yourself. 

Wow. You didn’t think it would be that hard. But it really is. Even more so because you know, no matter the impact you had on those kids’ life, they’re bound to forget you one day...It was a sad thought, but one you wrongfully thought would be true. 

Actual truth was, you shaped a lot of those children’s lives and they’d forever be grateful that you never gave up on them. 

And as a new year starts, and your class is full of unfamiliar faces, you have to face the fact that this is what being a teacher is. 

************

For the next few years, you don’t really see him. Briefly in the school’s corridor as he goes to a parent/teacher meeting or something of the like. Or in the principal’s office, after he made yet another large donation for the school (since his son enrolled in a “normal” school, Bruce got very involved in the education system in Gotham and donated a lot of money to a lot of schools in rough neighborhoods, unknowingly accomplishing your lifelong dream). 

But you don’t see him as much as when Dick was in your class. 

Which makes sense...Why would you keep seeing Bruce Wayne ? 

You saw him often because you were the kind of teacher to involve the parent a lot. You saw him when Dick decided to make an expose on him, and dragged him in his classroom (it was very funny to see the famed Bruce Wayne awkwardly standing in front of a bunch of kids). You saw him when you had to talk about Dick’s progress or problems. You...Well, you saw him like every other parent. Nothing special was going on. 

And now, as you don’t have his kid as a student anymore, of course you see him less. 

But sometimes, sometimes when you finish work and walk back to your car, he waves at you from his own car (he always made sure to pick his son up) and smiles, and honestly...It’s enough for you. 

************

This sort of non-relationship goes on for a very long time. Where you quickly see each others in hallways, waving at each others in the parking lot, and catching up with quick conversations that are always the same : 

“Hello Mister Wayne.” 

“Hello Miss (Y/L/N).” 

“How are you today ?” 

“Fantastic, and you ?” 

“Great. Well, I have to go to my class.” 

“Yes, I have to go to. It was nice seeing you.” 

“You too.”

Hundreds and hundreds of short conversations, that started to mean a lot to you, even more so since Dick was almost going to graduate primary school and..Oh god. 

You had a crush on Bruce Wayne. 

Then again, in Gotham city, with how much he appeared on TV and such, a lot of people had a crush on Bruce Wayne. 

But you…well, he was handsome, nice, funny, but most of all, he cared so much about this little boy he adopted, that…how could you resist really ? You rationalized everything by thinking that you liked him so much only because of how much he cared for Dick (who wasn’t even your student anymore !). 

Of course. People caring about "your" kids, about their education and all, always kinda made you melt. Even more so when they were single parent ! 

Yes. Yes you didn't really liked Bruce Wayne. You didn't really have a crush on him. You just…Admired how well he took care of that kid that suddenly appeared in his life. Hell, he seemed to take care of him better than the parents who had their own children since birth…It was something. 

Of course, you were sure their "butler", Alfred Pennyworth, that you met a few times, was for something in all this. Still. It was very sweet. And impressive. And all those feelings gave you the impression you had a crush on him...but you really don’t, right ? 

No. No you don’t. Oh, but here he comes, you know he has a meeting with Dick’s 6th grade teacher and... 

“Hello, Miss (Y/N/L).”

“Hello, Mister Wayne.” 

The same conversation. 

Over and over again. 

And it always ends on large smiles being exchanged, and a short pause, as if neither of you truly want to leave...

************

Dick graduated sixth grade and you stopped seeing Bruce Wayne. 

It made you oddly sad, but then again...That’s how life went, right ? It was time to move on from your silly crush that lasted those past three years. 

************

JASON.

Another year passes, and you’re slowly getting over Bruce Wayne. Your heart doesn’t beat as fast when you see him on TV, and you started to date men there and there, when you felt like you wanted to be with someone. 

After his graduation, you didn’t see Dick again, which confirmed your theory that no matter the impact you had on a child, when they moved on...They moved on. 

The truth was, Dick never forgot you, and wish he would have had the time to go back to his old school. But middle school was harder and more demanding than elementary school, and with his nightly activities...

But he never forgot the first teacher he had that made him feel like he could do anything. And that was always understanding, and adapted her way of teaching for every single kids in the class.

But that, you did not know. And you thought you had moved on, too. Until you saw him again. At the exact same place you met. In front of the principal office. 

“Mister Wayne ?!” 

“Miss (Y/L/N) !” 

He says with a warm smile, his hands on the shoulders of a little boy that couldn’t be older than ten or eleven. And you understand that he adopted again, and realize that yup, you still have a crush on Bruce Wayne. 

************

After Dick's debacle at Gotham Academy, how much he hated it and such…Bruce figured that with Jason, he'd just let him choose. 

So he went and took brochures from each school, and brought them back to the Manor for Jason to take a look at. Alfred had a little tear at the corner of his eye, when he witnessed his master going all around Gotham just to pick up infos on every single school so his kid could choose…

It was particularly refreshing that since Young Master Dick left, Bruce felt lonely. 

Even more so given the conditions they parted at the time…ah but that was another story, and the butler had no doubt in his mind that Dick would come around, forgive his father and vice versa. After all, young Master Dick was a teenager now (not since very long), he had to rebel at some point, and it did some good to Bruce to have someone disagreeing with his methods and making him reconsider things…But again, that was another story.

For now, everything was about Bruce going well out of his way to make sure Jason would be comfortable.

"You can go wherever you want."

"Really ?"

"Yes, you're the boss. Choose where you want to go."

Jason's face brightened, and Bruce couldn't help but smile at him. 

That little boy clearly had so few choices in his life…Oh god, Bruce hoped that suddenly having so many choices wouldn't overwhelm him ! 

But the boy was carefully studying brochures one by one, putting them away in three different piles. Bruce wondered for a second why, when the kid looked at him and understood his silent question :

"This pile is for the "big no no never", this one is for the "maybe", and this one is for "good ones""

Ah. Made sense. Organized little feller.

This went on for a few minutes until he picked up one brochure and exclaimed :

"Hey that's my old school !"

Bruce turned to look at what school Jason was pointing to. Oh. 

Oh. 

Wow. 

It was Dick's old school, too. 

The one in a not so nice neighborhood that he wanted to go to because friends he made while at the circus went there. And it used to be Jason's  ? Well. It made sense. Also, fate had funny ways sometimes.

“And do you want to go back there ?” 

“Well I only went one year there, but I think I still know people who are still there...It might be nice, to already know a few people ?” 

“So this one ?”

“I think so, yes. This one. I have a good feeling about it !” 

Bruce smiled, and...Did that mean he would see you again ? 

************

“This is my son, Jason.” 

He says proudly, hands holding reassuringly the boy’s shoulders. 

Oh yes, yes you vaguely remember reading an article about how Bruce Wayne adopted a new kid, after his older son went away in boarding school (which always made you feel odd, Dick didn’t sound like the boarding school type of kid ? Ah, but he must’ve been about 14 or 15 now, right ? Maybe his teen years weren’t going as smoothly as his childhood...). 

Wondering if you should ask how Dick is, or if it was maybe too personal given the circumstances, you turn to look at Jason and...

"Hey I remember you. You used to come to this school right ? In a few class below the one I teach currently, and then one day you disappeared !"

"You-You remember me ?"

"I always notice children that seem a little-"

"Odd ?"

"No, not odd. Sad. It was obvious something didn't go well in your household. I’ve been teaching long enough to...notice you guys. When you disappeared I asked you teacher and she told me you turned bad. There was no infos on where you lived so I couldn't go and see…I'm very glad you, in fact, turned the opposite of bad !"

"You…would've try to find me ?"

"Of course ! "Turning bad" is something too easily accepted in Gotham ! If you don't give up on a child, who might not have an ideal family environment, then they have a better chance ! Of course it doesn't always work, I did have a lot of failure…but a few hold on, and those few matters !"

Jason’s mind was blown away. He stopped going to school when his mom overdosed...He was 8, and suddenly had to fend off for himself, as no one cared to know what happened to the “son of that junkie on the third floor”. 

He survived as he could, by committing petty crimes and dangerous stunts. Until Bruce found him (or rather, until Jason stole the Batmobile’s tires and got caught). 

And here he was, having a home again for the first time in ever, and faced with a woman that genuinely was concerned about him, but didn’t have the means to help. 

And what would’ve happened if she had ? Well, Jason was glad she didn’t. She seemed nice, but he wouldn’t trade his new dad for the world. 

Bruce was his hero. And he loved him dearly. Why would he want any other parent now ? He had one that, in his eyes, was perfect for him. 

“So, you know him ?” 

Bruce was looking at you with eyes full of interests. The little speech you made about going out of your way to make sure every kids you encountered was ok...moved him. It stirred something in his heart. Something good. 

Something that felt nice. 

“Well, not per se. But I saw him around, like I said. It’s very nice to properly meet you, Jason.” 

“Likewise, Miss...”

“(Y/N/L).” 

You answer with a smile, and Jason finds himself wishing you’ll be his teacher, for this first year back to school in a while. 

“It’s unfortunate that Jason here, is entering fifth grade. He will not have you as a teacher...” 

“Fifth grade ? Well what a coincidence. I’ve been teaching that class for the past two years, to break the routine, you know ? There’s a lot to learn in fifth grade, it’s a pivotal year for kids, so I’m glad I was transferred to that class ! And I’m double glad because that mean we’ll see a  lot of each others, Jason.” 

And you smile at him, making him blush because he’s still not used to people being nice to him like that... 

Bruce smiles too, but not for the same reasons. So you’re teaching fifth grade now huh ? Well. That means you’ll see a whole lot of HIM too...

************

Young Jason Todd. 

Brilliant child. 

Promising. You were sure he would have a very VERY bright future ! It wouldn’t surprise you if he was the one to take on Wayne Enterprise, he was THAT smart. Yes. Bright future in coming for sure (um...). 

More studious than Dick was. More attentive, too. Dick could sometimes be the class clown, and get distracted. But Jason ? Jason was listening carefully, drinking your every words, and oh it was so nice to have a student like him in your class ? 

Even more so when you knew that he could’ve turned very bad if Bruce didn’t adopt him...Ah damn. This just enhanced exponentially your crush on Bruce. 

************

It’s like it’s a redo of when Dick was your student. 

Once again, you see a lot of Bruce Wayne (and are comforted that this will go on for at least one year afterward, until Jason graduated). But since his son is your student again, he’s often at the school. 

Working with the principal to help financially, and participating greatly in Jason’s school life. 

And the crush continued, although you were pretty sure he just saw you as his kid’s teacher...Then again, why would he see you any differently ? 

************

“YEAAAAH GO GIANNNNNNTS !!” 

Jason screams at the top of his lungs, standing up on his chair in the massive Knightsdome Sporting Complex, watching with attention the baseball match unfolding in front of his eyes. 

For his birthday, the boy asked to go to a game with his dad, and here he was, with Bruce...at a game. Not any game. The game of the year ! 

And he was so excited and hyped, that Bruce didn’t regret one bit taking the day off from Wayne Enterprise to be able to come with him here. 

And that’s when he sees you. 

You’re a few row down, on the left, and you’re...Talking with a guy. 

Who was that guy ?

The dude kisses your cheek and Bruce’s heart tighten. Probably your boyfriend.

Something escaped him though...Why was seeing his kid’s teacher with her boyfriend made him feel so melancholic ? Why did it hurt his heart ? 

And then the answer came as easily as Jason screaming in happiness as his favorite team just scored a point...He had a crush on you. 

He was pretty sure he had a crush on you ever since he met you, when it was Dick’s first day. And all this year he was your student, and the moments you shared with him...The moments you shared ? What was he saying ?! You didn’t share any moments. You were just his son’s teacher ! 

It was normal to have meetings and such. And then, it was just courtoisie to say hello after that, when Dick was still in the school. Right ? No matter if he wasn’t as close to any other of Dick’s teachers...If he wasn’t as involved. They weren’t like you and...

This was stupid. You were his kid’s teacher. He couldn’t have a crush on you. 

Ah but now you smile, and throw an arm around that guy’s shoulder, looking happy and. It dampens Bruce’s mood greatly. Why ? Why does he feel so blue ? This is suppose to be a great moment with his son, why are his eyes fixed on you and...

“DAD DAD !! DID YOU SEE THAT DAD !!!???? THIS WAS AWESOME !!” 

Dad. This is the first time Jason calls him dad. And Bruce focuses back on the boy, lying about having seen “that”, and looking at his son enthusiastically jumping up and down his chair in excitement. Cute boy. 

************

“Thanks for those killer seats, sis’.” 

“No problem, I’m enjoying it too haha. Happy birthday, dumbass !” 

You say, putting your arm around your younger brother’s shoulders, while enjoying seeing the Giants kicking Metropolis’ team’s ass. 

Aaaah, you loved baseball.

************

“AH YES GOOO GIANNNNTS.” 

Jason was still screaming, holding a stray ball Bruce caught for him above his head in a sign of victory. They were walking up the path to Wayne Manor’s entrance now, but Jason’s excitement still hadn’t gone down. 

He was still jumping all around, talking about how cool everything was, and how much he loved the stray ball Bruce caught, and how he hoped he’ll get it signed one day, and how much he loved his new Giants t-shirt, and his new giants cap, and his new Giants baseball pants, and his new Giants shoes, and how he wished he could wear all of it to school and...

“Hey, why don’t you ask miss (Y/N/L) to be your girlfriend ?” 

The sudden question takes him by surprise and he stops mid-way up the stairs to the entrance, and stare at his son. 

“What ?” 

Jason talked so much and so fast, the past hour, that Bruce didn’t catch everything he talked about, and most certainly missed how they arrived on this subject ?

“Why don’t you ask miss (Y/N/L) to be your girlfriend ?” 

“That’s...I..You...She...We...I...”

It’s the first time Jason sees his father stutter, and he realizes he must’ve stroke a cord with that question. He smiles slyly and adds : 

“Oh you thought about it huh ?” 

He got up a few stairs ahead of his dad so he could be at his level, and nudged him with his shoulder knowingly, being absolutely obnoxious. 

“What are you talking about ? She’s your teacher, we can’t !” 

There’s a short silence, during which Jason loses his smirk that is replaced by a confused expression and, as simple as that, he asks : 

“Why ? You like her, no ?” 

Yes. Yes he did...But it was more complicated than that. And she apparently had a boyfriend ! Bruce didn’t feel like ruining the day trying to explain his conflicted feelings to his son, and so he said : 

“Because she’s your teacher, and that’s that.” 

************

Three years after Jason isn’t your student anymore, you hear about his death. In the worst way possible. Through the TV, as you’re preparing dinner. 

And it shatters you. You’ve always liked Jason a lot, he was so bright, he was supposed to have a successful future !! 

He died during the Joker’s terrorist attack, apparently, along with a few other people. And it was the most tragic day of your life... 

You don’t see Bruce for years, after that.

************

After Jason’s death, you vowed your entire life to teaching, even more than before. It became vitale to you, that future generations would make this city better, would give it some sort of sense. 

Because in which world was it normal for a 15 years old boy to die because yet another psycho was roaming the streets ? 

Jason fuels even more your wish to make this city a more bearable place to live in, and you work more than ever towards this goal, creating the “Jason Todd school foundation”, a name barely in homage to the student who inspired this entire action. In homage of a student who particularly touched your heart, and represented in himself why there was a desperate need to improve the education in Gotham City.

Your non-profit charity works harder than any other, to improve schools in Gotham, and give a better chance to this kids. 

One of your biggest donator is a certain Bruce Wayne, but you still don’t see him anymore.

************

TIM.

It’s only when he sees you talking to one of your students, right there, at the end of the hallway, that he realizes how much he missed you. 

Two years passed since...Since his life completely changed. Since everything was painted in black again. And yet, yet it feels like it was yesterday he saw your smile. 

He heard your voice. 

He saw you care for “your” children. 

It’s like a small ray of sunshine in his heart, as he finally sees you again. After Jason...After what happened, he felt like he couldn’t face you. Like he couldn’t face one of the only person in the world that cared greatly about that boy. 

And so he avoided you. But Destiny brought him back in your path, and as you notice him, and a natural smile spreads across your face...He realizes how much he missed you. 

In his hand, he squeezes Tim’s hand a little tighter, and the boy looks up at his dad curiously. What got into him ?  

The other small ray of sunshine in his dark and dry heart, his new son, is about to asks him what’s up, when he sees how his dad is looking at that woman, at the end of the hallway. 

Timothy Drake-Wayne has always been the smartest little boy around, and he immediately understands what is going on...

************

"So you can choose chum. Either school. This is Gotham Academy, the "best" one but it really has that reputation because…money. And then that's the one Dick and…Dick went to. He liked it very much, the facilities are not as nice, but the teachers are passionate."

Bruce doesn’t mention Jason, even though Tim is pretty sure Jason too, went to that school. But he knows it’s a delicate subject, so he does not mention it.

"Where did he go ? Why wasn't he in Gotham Academy ?"

"He couldn't get along with people."

"…Dick ? Our Dick ? Not getting along with people ?"

Tim was properly shocked. 

"He can get mad very fast, you know ? Remember when you beat him at Smash Bros ?

"Oh yeah…He broke the controller. I just thought it was an occasional thing ! He really likes smash bros"

"It's not that occasional. He can get very angry very fast. And the kids in Gotham Academy weren't very nice to him, so he got angry often. It was also not long after his parents…”

"Oh. I get it…Well, I want to go where Dick went !"

Bruce’s heart tighten at the mere idea to see you again. 

Was he ready to face you, after ignoring you for two years ? After Jason stopped being your student, the boy still went to see you, as you really changed his life. He wanted to be a teacher, too, so he often came and observe...Which meant you saw a lot of Bruce too. 

And Bruce felt like he owed you an explanation. About how Jason...But he couldn’t. He couldn’t face you. He just couldn’t.

Something in him made him sure that if he would talk to you, he’d break down. He’d tell you everything. Everything. 

And he just couldn’t do that. 

************

Tim hated school. For the past two years, he got away from not going by falsifying a paper where he forged his parents’ signature saying he was now homeschooled. The truth was, his parents never really paid attention to what he was doing, and since he hated school...

He might as well not go, and do other things of his days. Like discovering who the Batman was !  

And he did, he did found out ! Shortly after that, and after stubbornly going to Wayne Manor days after days so Bruce would train him, he lost his parents ...And got adopted by the Batman himself. 

It was strange, because Bruce paid a lot of attention to what he was doing. Actually, he was borderline overprotective sometimes...Of course, Tim knew it was because of the Robin-he-wasn’t-allowed-to-talk-about. 

Jason Todd. The brother that he’ll never know. Only Dick, talked to him about that (after Jason’s death, Dick came back to the Manor to support Bruce, and enrolled in a high school downtown, where he was a senior). Bruce never mentioned him, but Tim saw him spend hours standing in front of Jason’s old suit, and staring at it...

But that was another story. That nonetheless explained why Bruce was being particularly protective of him (like, he still held his hand when they were walking in the streets and stuffs like that, even though Tim was 9 now !). 

In any way, Tim still hated school, and it’s full of “don’t wanna” and dreading the boring hours he’d spend in class learning things he already knew, that he dragged his feet across the corridor to go to his first class.

Dick told him about the teacher, apparently he had him in third grade. Great. A third grade teacher teaching fifth grader. Wow. He would learn sooooo much. 

************

This was the first time in his life Tim actually liked school. Sure, you were teaching a lot of things he already knew but the methods you were using, with games and fun things so they’d remember better, was amazing ! 

It didn’t feel like school, yet as the end of the day drew near, Tim realized he actually learned a lot of things ! WOW ! And for the first time in his life, Tim couldn’t wait for the next day. 

You too, couldn’t wait for the next day, as it was going to be the first teacher/student conference, and you’d see your forbidden crush, Bruce Wayne. 

************

“So, are you going to take miss (Y/L/N) on a date ?” 

“What ?” 

Bruce and Tim were in one of the car, driving back home, when Tim just jumped right into it. 

“Pleaaase, all this chit chat you guys had was unbearable. You talked so much about nothing.” 

“We were talking about your latest test, chum.” 

“Right. For the first two seconds. Then you made up excuses to keep talking.” 

“Well, you sure have a great imagination. Miss (Y/L/N) said so herself.” 

“Oh really dad, we’re really going to go that way ? You’re going to deny it ?” 

“Tim, we were just talking about you. That’s it. Just like any parents and teachers.” 

“...Riiiiiight.” 

Obviously, the boy wasn’t convinced. However, he dropped the subject, too surprised by the fact his father’s face was slowly turning bright red. 

************

Cassandra.

“This is my new sister Cass !” 

Tim says enthusiastically, smiling widely at you. 

“She’s older than me, but she um...isn’t from this country, so never went really to school so that’s why she’s in your class and I’m in sixth grade ! She’s very nice ! She’s coming here because I’m here too ! She wanted to be where I was ! She’s my sister !” 

“Cass” looks at you curiously, a bit of shyness in her eyes too, and when you raise a hand to shake hers, she flinches back. 

It doesn’t take you long to recognize all the signs of a child that was beaten by her parents, and a rush of anger climbs inside you. 

Tim, after he introduced his sister, rushes to his own class, and you’re left with Cass as the rest of your students come in. 

She goes from one foot to the other, unsure of what she’s supposed to do in this first day of school, and it’s obvious...it really is, her first day of school.

And already, you think of a plan to make her feel welcome. To make her feel like it’s ok if she doesn’t get everything right away, or if she isn’t at the same level than others. 

You quickly realizes she does not speak much, most likely because she wasn’t really taught to. It breaks your heart, and you do everything in your power to adapt your class for her. To give her that extra support. 

And in that case, isn’t about having a favorite or not, it’s about being there for kids who need it. It’s your entire life’s work up until now. 

Cass incarnates exactly why you became a teacher. 

**********

“You. Like her.” 

Cass says simply, touching her father’s chest, and then pointing at you, who’s currently helping a few kids finishing last minutes decoration for the school play. 

Bruce turns to you, looking longingly at you as you smile to the kids, and help Tim put his hat on properly (he was playing President Lincoln..). Of course, just as he was looking at you, you had to take care of his kids. 

His feelings for you were always stronger, when he saw you with one of his children. You’ve always been such a great teacher, caring so much for them. 

Of course, you cared about all your students. More often than not, you went out of your way to make sure a kid had enough food, or was treated properly. Went out of your way to go after children who stopped coming to class, dragging them back in. 

How could he not like you ? 

He turns to Cass now. His only daughter. His sweet, sweet daughter. How could he lie to her ? It is impossible. 

And so, for the first time since, years ago at a certain baseball game, he realized he had a crush on you (that might’ve turned into something more now), he says aloud : 

“Yes. Yes, I do.” 

Cass smiles sadly, because she understands he’ll never act upon his feelings for multiple reasons. And she understands her precious “Miss (Y/N/L)” won’t either... 

************

It’s interesting, how your relationship evolved, in almost ten years. From when Dick first became your student, to when Cass left your class for the last time. 

Nowadays, you actually became friends, mainly because Bruce became one of the board member of your Charity. 

You had to admit this was going beyond a simple teacher/parent relationship (as if it hadn’t been that way for years). But...but you’d never cross a certain line

Neither of you would admit your feelings. You’d simply stare at each others from a far, and look away when the other turned their head toward you. 

You started to call each others by your first names, but it just made sense. 

You were friends now. Nothing more. Even if Cass wasn’t your student anymore, neither were any of his other kids...Things could still not go further. 

That’s simply how things were. 

He did not want to drag you in his life, and felt like it was inappropriate to date his kids’ teacher (even if technically you weren’t anymore, you were still “Miss (Y/N/L)” to all of them). And the media would crush you... 

As for you, in your head, those kids, even if the oldest one was going on his twenties, were still your students. And you had a strong ethic..

************

DAMIAN.

“I don’t see why I have to go to this...public school, father” 

At the word “public”, Damian shivered slightly and Bruce couldn’t help but roll his eyes. Oh, how he wished his boy wouldn’t have inherited his dramatic side...

"Your brothers and sister loved this school."

"Don't call them that please, they're not my-"

"You're my son. They're my children too. You're their brother. End of story."

There’s a short silence, where Damian scoffs. He breaks his stubborn silence, realizing his father wasn’t going to budge, and adds : 

“Yes well like I said, they weren’t use to a high standard of living. Mother hired the best private tutors and such. If they’re satisfied with mediocrity then good for them.”

“Well, here’s another reason to go to this school. Detach yourself from this type of life, isn’t that what you want to do ? Plus I think it would do you nicely to be a little more humble.”

“Humble ? My life is anything but humble !”

“Except for the fact that now, you’re going to a normal public school in a not so nice neighborhood in Gotham”

At those words, Damian’s eyes widen. Did his father just...make a joke ? Oh the smirk on his face was undeniable, he just mocked him !

“Hey, I-”

“Bruce ! Ah, and you must be Damian ?”

You say, as you see the both of them. Damian scoffs, and you take the conclusion that yes, it must be him. 

Bruce talked to you on the phone about his youngest son, who recently came into his life after...A lot of complications. He didn’t really tell you what happened, but you understood he dated a woman long ago and she had a son, and hid him from him. Which outraged you. But also was none of your business...

In any case, he talked to you about Damian. He had been raised in very high society, and warned you a little about him. But oh, you did not believe a child needed warnings. No matter what, you’d find a way to properly teach that boy. A method that would suit him. Like you did for all of your students (and man did you already had some tough cookies in your classes). 

************

Damian looked at his father, and then at you, and how you smiled at each others stupidly. And frowned. You left to ask something to the principal, and Damian turned to his father, saying :

“Mm. Are you sure you put me in this school to teach me how to be humble, or did you just want to see that teacher again ?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, boy.”

But Damian was not stupid, he could clearly see how his father’s eyes were lingering behind you, and how you smiled at him.

It made him sick.

************

You held Damian back at the end of a class, to talk about his latest test. 

He had made no mistake, and punctuated the entire thing with personal comments such as : “a baby would know this” and other “I could answer this one in Japanese” (and proceeding to write his entire answer in kanjis) etc etc...Which made you think that obviously, that kid did not want to be here. 

And most definitely could jump further into his studies, if he thought this class was much too easy. You had the occasion to see his tests and his attention in class, and it was clear the “high society” from which he came from educated him very very well. 

With an unimpressed look, Damian picked his stuffs up and went to your desk. You showed him his test, and said : 

“It has come to my attentions, thanks to your very...Smooth comments, that this class is probably not up to your level. I was thinking maybe we could see to have you skip a grade or two. Would that be something you want ?” 

He shrugs, still not looking very concern, and you sigh. In three months in your class, Damian hadn’t opened up at all. He was most definitely one tough cookie to crack...You sigh, and say : 

“I’ll talk to your father about it.”

“Useless, he won’t accept.”

“Really ? Why ?”

“He thinks I need to learn how to be humble.”

“Ah. And what do you think ?”

“Why would I hide how good I am at things ?”

“Ah but Damian, being humble isn’t about hiding that you’re good, but accepting and knowing there’s always room for improvement.”

You say with a smile, and it...does something to him. 

It’s not that your words have a particular impact on him, he heard Alfred or his “siblings” telling this kind of things hundred of times. 

But there’s something in your face that makes him flinch. Moves something inside him. It’s like...It’s like you genuinely care. 

Damian never really saw anyone looking at him with this expression. Clearly wanting to breach the gap, to make a jump and truly want the best for him. 

Of course, his father really tried to bond with him, but they still didn’t get each others at all. And with his siblings ? Tt, he had no siblings. With the others, he always tried to be better (without always succeeding), and it frustrated them. With reasons. 

So he never saw that particular smile, that particular expression. A genuine and hopeful smile. Someone not judging him in the least, and ready to give him a chance, even after he spend the last three months being horrible to them...

Damian couldn’t understand why you were looking at him like that. Why you had so much hope for him, why you didn’t give up already, why...Why ? 

Why were you smiling at him, while he made all the effort in the world to make you understand he did not want to be here ? 

Why ? 

He couldn’t understand. He hated not understanding.

And it made him...sick ?

************

Why did it make him sick again ? After a few more months of school, he couldn’t remember the reason. 

Classes were...Pleasant to him, when you were teaching them. He found himself wanting to listen. Wanting to participate. Wanting to talk. 

You had a way of approaching subjects that made everything fun, that made everyone wanting to learn more. 

Why did he dislike you so much at first ? Probably because he wasn’t used to someone genuinely caring about his well-being ? He had been surrounded by fakes and people trying to kill him since his birth, it was difficult to believe there were some good people on Earth. 

Bruce, just like how he noticed Cass’ speech improve after a few months in your class, noticed his son opening up more and more. 

He was still quite introverted, and sometimes acted like a brat...but he was also just a ten years old boy. He couldn’t be perfect. 

There was no doubt in Bruce’s mind that the way Damian slowly changed his mind and changed for the better, came in big part thanks to your class. It also, of course, came from the fact he had amazing children who weren’t about to let Damian get away with treating them as if they weren’t part of the family. 

Instead of getting mad at him though, they just involved him more in their lives, wether he wanted to or not (something they most definitely picked up from your class, where you always made sure everyone was included, and had a “non judgement zone” installed). And slowly but surely, he got used to it. 

He got used to say they were his brothers and sister. That they were a family. He got used to bicker over siblings stuffs, but not to hate them anymore just because they existed. 

He was raised to be like that. Individualist, and taught to crush anyone he deemed a threat. For him, the children his father adopted were a great threat, they could steal his legacy...But slowly, he realized all he had been taught was rotten. 

It took time, of course. And patience. 

But the fact no one was willing to give up on him made him feel things. For the first time in his life, he felt what that “love” thing was, and what being actually cared for felt like. 

A mix of a healthy family environment (and an escape to kick ass at night, and release some frustration), and a good school environment, and slowly but surely, Damian really did improve.

Of course, the change came from him. He was the one wanting to change, wanting to be part of something...But he most definitely had great help along the way. 

Everything culminated the day he had to do an expose for his class, and chose Tim as his subject. 

Of course, Tim knew nothing about it. Damian had come to see him as his brother, and would often boast to his friends at school how great his siblings were...but he’d never tell them to their face. 

Only you knew, how greatly he admired his big brother Tim. He talked a lot about how Tim was only 16 and already managing a lot of things at their father’s enterprise, and he couldn’t help but digress to brag about his other siblings too, who were all very successful. 

And no one in his family would ever have known, if it wasn’t for you who called Bruce to tell him about this absolutely beautiful expose Damian did about his siblings...It made you almost tear up. Even more so when he talked about “the brother he never met”, Jason (who was alive at the time, and back in the family, but the public still thought he was dead...however Damian couldn’t help but talk and brag about him too, even if he had to use the past tense. He would realize only later, how insensitive it could be to have done that in front of you, who still hadn’t gotten over his death...). 

You told everything to Bruce, and it almost sounded like you talked about your own son. It did all kind of things to Bruce’s heart. Nothing he said alout, though. 

************

Damian was going to graduate from elementary school when it happened. 

It was the first full blown charity ball you held for your “Jason Todd school foundation”, and...You had no illusion. 

If people came to your little event it was because Bruce Wayne was here too.

It had been, nonetheless, a rather pleasant evening. You caught up with Dick, Tim and Cass (and was painfully reminded of Jason’s absence), and what they were doing currently. Tim and Cass were still in high school, and Dick had recently decided to join the police school. Didn’t surprise you much. 

Yes. It was a rather pleasant evening. 

Except for the fact your heart kept getting stabbed over and over again every time you saw Bruce with his date, a Russian model that was probably one of the most beautiful woman you ever saw. 

How could you compete against that ? ...Not that you’d want to compete. 

You do your best to avoid them all night long, even though you see him look for you, trying over and over again to come and talk to you. 

You just can’t do it. You can’t look at him in the eyes while he has such a gorgeous woman at his arm. And so, not very discreetly, you avoid him like the plague, always finding a way to put people between you and him, or escaping to the ladies’ bathrooms. 

Until she corners you.

You were fairly certain she noticed Bruce wanting to talk to you, and had gotten jealous that he therefor paid less attention to her. Oh but if only she knew you and Bruce were just friends...

She’s able to finally talk to you as he went to get some drinks, and before even saying hello or anything, she asks, with a clearly exaggeratted Russian accent (you heard her talk with a barely noticeable accent before) : 

“You’re the one who throw all this right ? Good party. Are you alone tonight though ? I thought it was custom for people who organized this kind of things to be accompanied.” 

She says, with an infuriating fake smile. And that’s the moment Bruce choses to come back, so you can’t even be snarky or anything. You don’t want Bruce to think anything bad about you, so you say : 

“Well, I’m here for the children. So no, I didn’t bring a date. I was too busy trying to appeal to people to invest in our new educative programs.” 

The Russian model looks you up and down and say, the condescendence clear in her voice : 

“Oh, is that why you’re alone ?” 

And here we go, yet another knife in the heart. Reminding you that beyond those impossible feelings you have for Bruce, you also take every hours of your day and use it towards your “educative cause”, virtually having no real social life. And wow. Outch. “Alone”. Touché. 

You don’t see Bruce frowning at his “date”, and you awkwardly smile before slipping away, finding an excuse to do so. 

“(Y/N) wait I wanted to...”

You hear him say something, but you already jumped in the middle of a bunch of people and joined their conversation, effectively blocking Bruce’s way to you. 

You really, really didn’t want to talk to him, even more so if that woman was at his arm. 

************

The night comes to an end, and you’re utterly satisfied of it. 

You managed (thanks to Bruce mainly), to find founding for all your projects, and had a nice nights full of passionate talk about education and such. 

You had the opportunity to hang out with ex-students of yours, that made great things of themselves. Not just Dick, Tim, Cass and Damian. It was kind of a given, they’d do great, mainly because of their father’s fortune (although those kids were geniuses). But kids from the worst neighborhood in Gotham that benefited from all your actions. 

You felt very proud, and shed many tears. More than once, you thought about Jason, and how you dedicated all this success to him. How you wished this would lead Gotham on a more peaceful path, and things like what happened to Jason would never happen again. 

The wound of his loss was still fresh, and as the evening was coming to an end, and people leaving, you took a little break and went out on the balcony to take a breath of fresh air. 

************

It was only ten minutes into your isolating time that he finally found you. 

And you were beautiful, there, your elbows on the bannister, looking out at the night lights of Gotham City. 

“Great night, huh ?” 

You jump a bit in the air, surprised, and turn to him. 

No Russian model around, coast clear ? 

“Yeah. Yeah it was good. We have enough fundings to rebuild a hundred schools haha. Just with your donation, we could’ve achieved all our project. Thank you, Bruce.”

“Well, it’s for a good cause.” 

“Still, many do not think or care about it.” 

“You know I agree with you about the importance of good education..” 

Yes. Yes you know. You’ve had many passionate conversations about the future of Gotham, and what you wished it would become. 

Both of you had the same ideas and ideals. Both of you wanted to see Gotham thriving and peaceful. With happy inhabitants that wouldn’t be afraid anymore. 

The Batman helped a lot, for sure, but it was to the people to do the rest. By making the environment everyone was growing in a better place. 

And it started...With schools. 

Yes. Bruce always agreed with your point of view, and was the first to believe in you. 

“You did great, you know. None of this projects would exist without you.” 

“I just...gave people ideas. Nothing too big.” 

“Nothing too big ? (Y/N), you singlehandedly change Gotham’s entire educative field, making every schools better.” 

“Well, I didn’t do it alone.” 

You turn to him, and smile. 

Sure, maybe you initiated a lot of things. Maybe it’s your own experience and such that molded the entire charity and such. But without Bruce Wayne ? And his wonderful kids ? You’re not sure you would’ve gone too far. 

Dick is the one that gave you the self-confidence you needed by having to be strong to help him out, Jason was the one who pushed you to finally take a step forward, Tim and his novel ideas always made you want to improve, Cass and her will to fight and learn inspired you greatly in inventing new methods to help out kids with specific needs, and Damian showed you everyone could change for the better, no matter what. 

Wether you liked it or not, the Waynes really had a huge impact on your life. 

And as you turned to Bruce, somehow, you saw he was thinking something similar...In his eyes, you could see how grateful he was, and how much you changed and helped his kids. 

He smiles. 

You smile. 

Neither of you want to add anything. Everything goes through your eyes. 

Thanksfullness. Gratefulness. Pride. Contentment. 

It’s interesting, how for so many years, your fate and theirs was linked, in more ways than you could imagine. 

To the point that now, Bruce couldn’t imagine a life without you, and vice versa. 

You really were, great friends...

The word hurts, and you look away, unable to hold his gaze. 

Friends. 

His calloused fingers brush your cheek, you you’re so surprised you turn back to him and...No. No he can’t. You can’t. 

You know this look. 

And if you’re being honest with yourself, you’ve known for a while. 

Which is why you were frustrated with him bringing dates everywhere, him still being kind of a playboy (even though his kids gave him an excuse to tame it down). Frustrated with those feelings too because...

Because both of you knew you shared it. 

Both of you knew...Probably since a long time. 

Not that you nor him would ever act upon it, because then, it could change everything, and in a very bad way. 

Plus, you can’t date a student’s parent. You have a very strict ethic.

And he can’t bring you into his world. 

Frustration. 

You both know. 

But you’ll never do anything about it. 

And then...

...

...

...

...

...

He kisses you.

He kisses you and it’s like those past twelve years of pining for him suddenly fly away. Like you’re 23 again, fresh out of college, about to teach your first class ever, and you see him. About your age. And he has a ward...A son.

You talk for a few minutes, you fight, you apologize, it clicks. And then he leaves, and for a year, you help his son grow. After that, you don’t see him for a while...Until he comes back, with another adoptive son.

Jason. And then Tim. Cassandra. Finally, now, Damian.

All those years walking a parallel line to his, acting as if his kids aren’t your favorite in your class (because “you don’t play favorite, that’d go against my entire work ethic !”). Acting as if you don’t make up a lot of parent/teachers conferences just to see him (because you didn’t really need that much...). Acting as if it didn’t hurt you the most when his kids moved on, and you stopped seeing them...and him.

He kisses you and it’s like you’re 23 again. Acting right away on your feelings. Not being afraid.

Afraid of what ?

He’s one of your student’s father. It’s not ethical. He’s also rich and handsome, so out of your league. And it’s unrationnal, you don’t see him that often.

Afraid of what ?

Rejection. Loneliness. Knowing exactly what you want but never doing anything to achieve it. Regrets. ...

12 years vanish, as he kisses you.

You’re 23 again, and...and...And you can’t do this !

He’s one of your student’s parent ! He’s THE Bruce Wayne !

The sudden bliss you felt as his lips met yours vanishes too, and it’s like a cold bucket of water dumped on your head as you realize...

You can’t do this.

Now, or 12 years ago, it’s the same situation.

You can’t do this.

And so you softly pushes him away...

“I-I...”

It’s more difficult than you think, to say those words. He looks at you curiously, a fiery passion still lingering in his eyes.

“I can’t.”

You say, and the only thing you can do now, is run. Run as fast as you can.

“Fly you fools”, are the words that come to your mind. You have to leave, far, far away. And now, you have to stop talking to you. 

Because this all thing is unethical. 

You can’t date one of your student’s parent ! Even though none of them are your student anymore...

And Bruce Wayne is so out of your League ! Even though he’s the one who kissed you first...

And this could change everything, after all, he became your best friend, this could ruin everything ! Even though whenever you saw each others with someone else you felt like dying... 

And he’ll surely reject you, you’re just you, a simple elementary teacher, and he’s him, THE bruce Wayne ! Even though he always looked at you as if you were much more than a “simple elementary school teacher”. 

And...

And...

And...

“Why ?” 

He asks. Why ? Why ? Why ? Why can’t you ? 

Because of all the reasons you keep listing in your head. Student’s dad. Rejection. Out of league. Too much. Not enough. Regrets. Friendship. 

Because...because...Why ? 

He knows. Of course he does. 

He knows you love him. 

And deep down, amongst all the insecurities and fear...You know he loves you. 

So, why ? 

You can’t escape this. He knows. You know. You both knew for a while, without ever acting upon it. Why ? 

Fears. 

Stupid ones. 

Why ? 

As if a divine force was bringing you back to him, you get close to his body again, without even noticing yours moving. 

Why not ?

When you think about it, all those years, it’s as if destiny lead you to each others. Bruce Wayne’s children should’ve never end up in a second rate school in a shitty neighborhood...And yet they all did. 

An elementary school teacher really was supposed to have such a huge impact on “her” kids ? Well, you did. 

Two parallel lines. Always going in the same direction, but never quite meeting.

Until a fateful accidental conjoncture. 

Like a good night representing everything you believe in. 

Like tonight. 

So, why ? 

“I can’t.” 

You repeat, but you don’t even believe it yourself. 

“Why ?” 

“Because...Because...”

You can’t remember the reasons anymore. Was it even ever wrong ?  

He leaves you time, makes sure you want this. He takes a step back on the balcony, away from the remnant of people. 

You follow after him.  

Why ? 

Because you love him.

And he catches you in his arms...Why ? 

Because he loves you. 

12 years in the making. 

Of obvious signs ignored...Why ? 

You don’t even remember anymore. And it doesn’t matter.

Why ? 

Because he’s kissing you again. 

Now that he’s sure. Now that you’re not running away for...reasons you can’t recall. Now that he’s sure. Now that you’re sure. 

It seems silly, that you lost so many years...But then again, it’s only now that you’re finally ready. 

Why ? 

Because as you both reflected on what you accomplished, and what the other’s place was in your life, you both came to a logic realization : 

You were in love. 

And so you kiss him back, and it’s like you’re 23 again. 

************

“AH ! Finally !”

Tim exclaims, as he points to his father kissing his favorite teacher ever, Miss (Y/L/N)...No, (Y/N). And although he feels rather content that this is happening, he finds it disgusting. 

“Oh geez they’re really going at it...” 

Damian makes a face, because he also thinks the kiss is gross. However, in his heart, and not about to say it out loud just yet, he was very happy for his father. And for himself, really. 

Cass, a smirk on her face, simply said : 

“Called it.” 

But then Dick, throwing an arm around her shoulder, adds : 

“Oh no little sister. No no no. Eight years old me shall forever remain known as the one that “called it” first ! Hahahaha.”

And indeed, it’s only, over twelve years ago now, when little Dick asked if you could be his dad’s girlfriend, that you allowed your feelings to truly burgeoned. 

Because as long as his kids were ok with you two being an item, really, who cared about anything else ?

_________________________________________________

WELL !! Here we are. I hope you liked it. Thanks very much for reading, and see you soon with a new story :). Hoping this one wasn’t too bad...

As usual, feedbacks, or comments about what you think of the story in general (good or bad, by the way. But please don’t be just mean, if you did not like something try to say why ? We usually all know why we don’t like a thing, so please if you think of something negatively, try to explain why  you did not like it so I can improve next time and not just feel like shit ? Saying something is “bad” and that is it is counterproductive, rude and not very nice...There’s always a way to say things :) ) and reblogs and all are very VERY welcomed. 

[queenofallimagines]

Girl I love your works so much😌❤️❤️ I was wondering if you could do the captains with a black reader and they got colored braids for the first time and there all surprised thanks 😊 -🍵

Thank you!! This request is godteir 👌🏿 also all my favs in one request? Absolutely

Daichi:

- I have only seen 3 episodes and the final chapter of haikyuu but I love him sm

- This mans is sprung

- Daddy Daichi always is your biggest hype man

- Will make sure you are always wearing your bonnet and your edges are laid

- When you show up in purple and pink braids he’s simping

- Like might as well be Tanaka 2.0 lol

- Offers to lay your edges every morning

- Lives to show you off

- Power couple

- Noya: can we get back to practice-

- Daichi: hold on I gotta make sure this pic of them for their finsta

- If you do them in sailor moon buns he will cry

- You’re so cute

Kuroo:

- lmfaoo He’s so extra

- Always doing the most

- “Dam royalty only”

- He knows your a baddie and will tell you and everyone else

- Arms permanently around you

- “Dam chibi-Chan you look good”

- Colored braids will kill him

- ‘Heart eyes motherfucker’

- Takes you out on a date all day just to show you off

- Kenma is tired of hearing about it

- Tetsu: they look so good in red tho!!

- Kenma: sir this is a McDonald’s drive thru

- Lev also thinks you’re cute

- Can’t stop staring tho

- Just entranced how beautiful you look

- “Apparently your skin has been kissed by the sun”

- He’s cocky but a total sweetheart about it

Oikawa:

- lmao welcome to the circus

- My favorite clown

- Will always talk about your drip

- Iwaizumi is exhausted

- Okay but if you get teal braids and wear them to his game

- Hahahahah unless👀👀

- He will cry

- Like full in sobbing

- “Wow they love and support me so much and look good doing it?? 🥵🥵”

- He’s whipped

- “I am once again asking for your hand in marriage”

- “Get rid of all your side hoes and we’ll see”

- You have his full undivided attention

- Y’all both are the baddest

- Just expect his fangirls to simp for you too

Ushijima:

- lmao I’m in love with a brick wall

- He’s not indifferent to how you look but he doesn’t know how to express his feelings

- But you make his heart dance dance revolution

- So when you pop up to practice in purple braids it’s a wrap

- He just shuts down

- Tendou is laughing

- Bluntly unaware

- “What did you do to your hair?”

- “Oh I wanted a change of pace so I got purple.”

- “......you look very attractive.”

- Lol no filter at all

- Side note goshiki is your kid and he thinks you look bomb

- If you’re the manager he will be slightly cocky about it

- “My s/o is cheering for me. Is yours?”

- 💀💀💀 he says anything BC like who is gon beat his ass??

- Not a soul

- In private he will deal out more compliments

- Offers to massage your scalp if your braids are tight enough to pull your hairline back

- Scalp kisses🥺🥺🥺

- He’s such a good boy

Bokuto:

- The ringleader of the circus

- He’s so energetic

- Hope you have the energy to deal

- BC he’s hype all the time

- “You look so good!!”

- Won’t touch your hair BC he knows it’s probably tender but he will help oil your scalp

- “My baby looks so cute with her night hat on🥺🥺”

- Will wake up before you just to make sure it stayed on through the night

- Keji is exhausted from hearing about it

- But when he sees you he’s like “oh I get it now”

- Will kiss you all over your face

- King of love and affection

- Will brag to strangers in the streets LMAO

- “You see my lock screen? It’s my beautiful Melaninated partner?”

- “You ain’t gotta flex on me like that”

- “I literally just breathed bo.”

[nyasha-of-germa-66]

Could you do F K and Let for buggy the clown please and congratulations on 100 followers 💯💯

It’s always a pleasure to write for Buggy, my favorite One Piece character!~ I honestly don’t know what took me so long to finish this... and I’m terribly sorry for the long wait! Hopefully, you meant the SFW alphabet, but if not, please let me know! I’ll gladly write for him again using the NSFW alphabet. I can never get enough of him haha.~ Thank you so much for the request, Anon!~ 😁 

Buggy - SFW Alphabet Letters F, K, L

F = Fight – (Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?)

Buggy is generally a fun-loving guy, and someone has to really piss him off to get him in a fighting mood. With his S/O, however, their fights are likely to revolve around a number of issues including the clown's obsession with treasure, insecurities with his nose, or his habits of running away from terrifying situations (like arguments with his S/O).

He may argue with his S/O or try to explain himself through shouting, but he never insults them or tries to hurt their feelings, only asking for them to understand things from his perspective.

The main reason behind why Buggy runs away is that he often gets emotional during fights with his S/O. He feels guilty about it and cries a little bit only because he's afraid of his S/O leaving him.

Buggy always apologizes first, and he does so with flowers, balloons, and stuffed animals. If his S/O is still a bit upset, he does whatever it takes make them crack a smile. When they accept his apology, he'll pull them into the tightest hug and shower them with light kisses, expressing his gratitude the entire time.

If his S/O is the one who apologizes or asks for forgiveness after a fight, he's struggling to hold back tears. He's held a lot of grudges in his lifetime, but the second that his S/O utters an apology, Buggy will not hesitate to forgive them and offer his own apologies.

He'll promise to never fight with his S/O ever again because of how awful it was being apart from them. Of course, it’s a hard promise to keep but he does whatever it takes to keep another fight from happening, even if it means putting treasures and riches second to his S/O. Treasure is replaceable; his S/O is not.

K = Kiss – (Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?)

Buggy claims to be a fantastic kisser, but the real experience may tell another story. He's not terrible, though. He’s just a little awkward because his nose tends to get in the way, which makes him a bit self-conscious - which then makes him stiff and awkward during the kiss.

His first kiss with his S/O comes about through a bizarre series of events, beginning with multiple failed attempts at him trying to kiss S/O only for someone to interrupt them or for him to chicken out suddenly right before by making up some excuse about needing to take care of captain duties. He definitely beats himself up for all those missed attempts, though.

He eventually decides to make the first kiss romantic for his S/O, so he’ll either surprise them with a bouquet of roses or a thoughtful date. What can go wrong with setting the mood a little bit?

The first kiss with Buggy feels like kissing a mannequin at first since he’s frozen in place, but after giving him a few seconds, he’s slowly moving his lips against his S/O’s. He might break the kiss with a nervous laugh and ask if he’s doing okay, but he really just wants to make the first kiss to be memorable.

Once he gets used to sharing kisses, he turns out to be a pretty good kisser. His lips are always soft, and he’s passionate but gentle. And he just loves it when his makeup lingers on his S/O’s lips, he’s even proud of the red smudges he leaves on their lips.

Buggy enjoys kissing his S/O any chance he can whether it’s first thing in the morning or whenever he’s casually strolling by in which he’ll give them a quick kiss on the cheek. But he especially loves kissing his S/O in front of others like his crew or anyone who looks down on him. It gives him the confidence boost he craves, even more so when his S/O initiates the kiss. 

L = Love Confession – (How would they confess to their s/o?

A confession from Buggy is an experience of a lifetime. Someone who thrives on being flashy and extravagant will definitely make his love confession over-the-top.

The days leading up to his planned confession, he'll bring his crush a wide variety of gifts, ranging from beautiful bouquets to over-sized stuffed animals to valuable treasures that he comes across during his plundering. Sure, he loves his treasure beyond compare, but the delightful feeling he gets from sharing his valuables with the person he adores most causes him to make impulsive decisions.

He'll plan a gourmet dinner at the finest restaurant he knows; he'll have his own crew put on a circus show for his crush; and then he'll take them somewhere private under the stars where beautiful fireworks will be set off in the distance just for them.

During his confession, Buggy is very sweet and sincere as he professes his amorous feelings towards them. Made obvious by his wavering voice and frequent pauses, he's terribly nervous while he's confessing. He doesn't know whether he should take his crush's hands into his own or if he should run away and leap into the ocean to avoid the chance of rejection, yet he maintains his composure and awaits his crush's response with a soft but nervous smile.

When his crush replies by returning their own feelings, Buggy is absolutely ecstatic and shocked at the same time. His body even comes apart thanks to the powers of his Chop-Chop Fruit, which only emphasizes his stunned reaction even more.

He's so giddy and lovestruck after his S/O returns his feelings that it'll last several days where nothing hardly phases him. All he can think about are his S/O's precious words, and to him, nothing else really matters.

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Hello yes, could you elaborate on the Comte wedding event pleease. Crying and fangirling and dying are all acceptable. I missed it and I adore your rambles about Comte? Thank you either way.

!!! I’d be delighted to!! And awww, I’m so glad :D I love to write about him in any capacity, it makes me so happy to know people enjoy it when I do! Tysm for the full license to cry/fangirl/die because lbr it ain’t a Comte event if all three of those things don’t happen .Please don’t worry, I don’t mind talking abt it anyway! 💕💕💕

Okay my fellow Comte stans, you know the drill! I’ll be placing the details of the Wedding Story Event (jpn version) below the cut! Please don’t read if you want to wait for the official translation, and I hope you enjoy if you do take a peak! c:

AIGHT Y’ALL in fair Verona where we lay our scene-- This event begins on a lovely summer day with Comte and MC at a boutique picking out a wedding dress for their upcoming ceremony. As usual, she provides a bit of background as to how we got here. Comte doesn’t have a proposal event (as far as I know) like the other suitors because he actually proposes marriage in his MS. I won’t go too far into details just in case, but they essentially swear their love to each other in a church at night--just the two of them. (I’m not 100% sure, but I think this event takes place on the anniversary of the vow that they shared, what Comte called becoming “a vampire’s bride.” Yes it’s as hot as it sounds AND I LOVED IT). Now, despite their private promise to each other, Comte does specify that he fully intends to have a public wedding whenever she feels comfortable doing that. As such, this event is picking up from there.

With all the nitty gritty settled, it’s time to get to the fun bits. So Comte is weaving in and out of the dresses, trying to find the perfect one for his beloved. MC is equal parts exasperated but amused, and she notes that it reminds her so much of when she first debuted in high society (reference to the beginning of Comte’s MS). Back then, when she agreed to debut, he told her that he would immediately send word to his tailor to make the necessary preparations. It’s a kind of nostalgic moment; she remembers how thorough and excited he was (”I’ll be sure to show off your every charm”), and he’s effusing that energy in the boutique too. Eventually he settles on two of them and requests that they both be prepared, and MC sputters. She’s like Comte???? W H Y we only need one dress???? And he insists that, since it’s a special occasion, there’s no harm in it is there? He also goes on to say that it is in line with her culture’s tradition of “dyeing the bride in the husband’s colors.” MC shoots back that the tradition doesn’t entail several wedding dresses for the bride, but he pays the correction no mind. Y’all. I loved this part because it just emphasizes how much of a LIL SHIT he can be. Like he’s 100% harmless but I was like BOI IF U DON’T--I WILL KISS UR CUTE FACE. YOU STOP THAT.

I find it interesting especially because it remains in line with a trend about Comte that is so arresting for me, something that I find so endearing about him. I’ll note other places in the event I find it, but in this moment he is revealing something critical: for all of his capacity to play with the language and expectations that other people have/use, he only ever uses it for good. Here he’s purely being playful (with a stark note of respect and awareness); he has no intention of overwhelming her or undermining her cultural expectations of what a wedding means. Especially because MC, even in her monologue, isn’t truly upset--she honestly seems to find it adorable and funny more than anything. It’s also clear that Comte is working within her comfort zones. While he would buy the entire damn boutique if she let him, he settles on two because he knows it would stress her out otherwise (MC tends to be p pragmatic, not really about extravagance she is a mood).

And so they make their selection and exit the boutique, and they’re walking arm in arm back to the carriage. Comte laments narrowing it down to only two, but he’s happy they found something nice. MC thanks him for bringing her along, but he says it’s only natural--he wanted to pick out the dress the world would see together, he would never be happy with it otherwise. MC melts (WHO WOULDN’T) and says she’s really looking forward to wearing them, and he’s shook AF. 

(OKAY BUT I NEED TO SCREAM ABOUT THIS. DOES HE UNDERSTAND HOW TOUCHED I AM. DOES HE KNOW. His route hammers home this idea that for Comte, being with someone absolutely means being on the same page. It means being there for each other yes--but it also means making sure the other person feels wanted and included. He could have so easily just picked his favorite and been like “yeah this is what we’re going with.” But not only does he not do that, he refuses the very idea of a ceremony without it. He wants this to mean something for both of them, and he’s more than willing to put in the time and effort to ascertain that. I’M FUCKING TENDER OKAY. HE CARES SO MUCH AND I SOB)

He asks her if there’s anything else that she really, really wants for their wedding, and she thinks it through. It’ll be a reasonably sized wedding, with the men of the mansion in attendance and most of their closer high society friends. They’ve picked out a dress, the venue is set, the people closest to her will be there...she really can’t think of anything else? So she asks him if he has anything he really wants to do for the wedding, and he replies in the negative too, saying that “My only ideal wedding can be one in which I can see you at your most happy." ARE YOU KIDDING ME--Before MC can recover from that, he goes on: "Even now, I'm enjoying the preparations, and I want to do whatever I can for you." MC feels like she can never win against his sweet affection, so she nearly kills him with her answering line: "It’s more than enough. More than anything, being able to swear our love together again--to renew our vow--is the best part of it all." Comte is visibly shocked and is quiet for moment (MAN DOWN!!!!!!!!! VAMPIRE DOWN GET THE DEFIBRILATORS!!!!! LEONARDO PUT THAT LIGHTNING ROD AWAY I SWEAR TO GOD--) before he just replies with a “Is that so :>>>” And translating this nearly killed me [At the sight of his gentle smile, I smile back.] IM GOING TO SCREAM THEY ARE JUST SO TENDER IM SOFTE????????????

As they’re walking, Comte asks MC to tell him about weddings in her time. What were they like? He wants a reference point. She goes on to describe how ceremonies really range from formal to more informal affairs, and gets to a little custom that’s apparently held in Japan. When a groom intends to marry a bride, he will go to the bride’s family to ask for their approval. Comte visibly seems concerned about it, and I’m pretty sure he feels bad denying her that experience; not only did he propose to her without knowing any of that, her family isn’t within range to be able to honor it properly now. Even so, he keeps listening and comments now and again with a great deal of interest, paying close attention. He asks, what happens if the groom is rejected by the family? MC goes on to say that it’s a kind of test of perseverance: the groom is expected to ask/prove himself until he gets an answer in the affirmative. Internally, she notes that such a thing rarely ever happens irl--it’s mostly dramatized in movies and TV shows. She used to dream of how thrilling it might be to have someone do that for her, but it was mostly just a silly little fancy, nothing she was obsessed over. Comte, being a literal fucking legend, senses this emotional shift in milliseconds, and starts musing about something. When she tries to ask what’s up, he’s like not to worry leave everything to me.

PLEASE CUE THE CIRCUS MUSIC. BECAUSE THIS IS ABSOLUTELY GOING TO TURN INTO A CLOWN FEST.

So it cuts to them back home and Comte is asking Sebastian to give MC’s hand in marriage. Sebastian is utterly bEWILDERED and is like “I mean I understand I’m probably the closest relative she has right now but also WHAT!? YOU’RE MY BOSS/LORD I’M YOUR BUTLER FOR CRYING OUT LOUD”. Comte 100% is undaunted by this very normal reaction and insists that class/status has no place in matters like this, and Sebastian and MC are desperately trying to stop him from bowing his head/kneeling. MC notes she never expected him to take it to heart, tells him "Comte, you really don't have to go that far, it's a custom not a duty--" (IT’S SO FUCKING FUNNY????? YOU CAN FEEL THEIR MOUNTING CONCERN AND I CAN’T BELIEVE COMTE WAS STRAIGHT UP JUST “i am not above begging” AND THEY’RE LIKE YOU SHOULD BE YOU SHOULD BE ABOVE BEGGING)

The circus only escalates when Leo comes in LAUGHING HIS ASS OFF "damn...bahahahhahahaaaaa now THIS oughtta be good/interesting." MC (and I simultaneously) start yelling at him and he replies "What? Comte's already ready and willing, why stop him?" For whatever reason, this gives Comte an idea (NEVER A GOOD SIGN) and he’s like you know what? That’s actually perfect, get everybody in here I’m gonna ask them for permission too :D

Several things I want to say about this. 1. COMTE LITERALLY DOES NOT EVEN REACT TO LEO’S MOCKING HE JUST “omg ur face was useful for smth for once this gives me an idea” 2. META TIME. First and foremost, I seriously can’t deal. This man knows MC has nothing because of her traveling through time, no friends or family--he’s always so, so aware of what she’s sacrificing to be with him. It is never outside of his thinking. Not only does this decision solidify her presence as a member of their family (I’m just so UGLY SOBBING about the fact that he does not consider them all ANYTHING LESS--THEY ARE HIS CHIRREN AND HE LOVES THEM AND I’M SOFT) this is also such a brilliant, strategic move on his part. Not only is he doing this to fulfill her younger wishes of having someone be so confident in their love for her that they would insist on it in front of her family/loved ones--his doing this also solidifies her presence as his wife within the mansion from here on. There can be no mistake; this is an unquestionable statement as to how her identity has shifted in meaning, a powerful allusion to his possessive streak. (and WE LOVE THAT FOR US HELL YEAH) 

Furthermore, I continue to be fascinated by the way he keeps subverting traditional or expected forms of supplication. While many could see this as a yielding of his pride (and in some ways he undeniably is) this choice to acknowledge her culture’s customs yields much more valuable dividends for him. 1. MC--notorious for never betraying the things she wants, having trouble asking for anything--is have her dreams fulfilled even if they were just silly little fantasies from when she was young. He’s actively making her happy, and he gets to openly gush about how much he loves her (FOR HIM THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF A WIN-WIN YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND--) 2. This is a way for him to make amends and do proper respect to the marriage customs of her place/time, and that’s infinitely important to him. He’s trying to set a precedent; that even if he ever does make a mistake or neglect something (even if accidental) he will do his utmost to make it right, pride and money be DAMNED. 

While it can be argued that he’s just being silly and over-the-top, when you look closely this is 100% a clever, very mindful approach to their future. While it may partially have been executed on an emotional/excited whim, he is also claiming MC as his own in the most clear and respectful way possible. And tbh that’s the hottest thing I’ve ever seen 

So, after Leo walks in on them everyone else starts filing in one at a time (OKAY YOU CAN’T CONVINCE ME THAT THEY WEREN’T ALL HUDDLED UP TO THE DOOR SQUIRMING TO HEAR WHAT WAS GOING ON AND AT SOME POINT LEO SAID “omfg i gotta see this dumbass bitch on his knees” AND BLEW THEIR COVER/MADE THEM EVEN MORE CURIOUS):

Jeanne: "It's so noisy in here." 

Mozart: "What's going on?"

Comte: "Ah, excellent timing. I want to get permission from everyone."

Vincent: "?????? Did you do something wrong Comte?? What could you possibly need forgiveness for?"

Isaac: "A mistake made/wrongdoing by Comte?...Why am I dreading what it could be..."

Dazai: “Ah yes, yes I see, you are asking for a young lady's hand in marriage” (IM WHEEZING BC EVERYONE ELSE IS SO LOST AND HE'S JUST 100% ON THE BALL KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT'S GOING ON THE NARRATIVE DISSONANCE IM CRYING)

Theo: Young lady??? The hell are you going on about

So things are getting increasingly chaotic and MC is just [jfc this is getting out of hand, Comte they don’t even know what you’re asking them to do]. She tries to explain but falters, and Comte puts an arm around her--signals that he’ll give  them the context. So he tells them "You all know that our wedding day is approaching. As such, I'm asking you all for your approval in taking MC as my bride. No matter what happens, I promise to make her happy forever--for every moment, every second of our time together. Please, forgive my taking her" (WHEN I TELL YOU MY HEAD WAS IN MY HANDS IDK HOW MC DIDN’T DIE ON THE SPOT S I R. SIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) MC: [...Comte...My heart melts at his confession, at his earnest plea. It feels like every single iota of our feelings are infused in every word he speaks, teeming with the love shared between us in overwhelming measure.]

For a little while silence falls until Napoleon speaks up, and honestly? It was so sweet ;-; I tear up every single time: “Forgiven. You know how much I dislike formalities anyway. And besides, who could say no to le Comte?” MC notes that everyone murmurs in agreement and a kind of warmth settles in the room. Arthur notes that MC will be a Comtesse very soon and MC just. I’m going to be a WHAT now (”C-c-comtesse??”). And it’s so FUCKING FUNNY YOU CAN FEEL THE RED EYE EDIT MEME ON COMTE WHEN HE GOES “Oh? Is there anything wrong with that? Everybody said yes, after all :>” MC internally accuses them of ganging up on her, but reveals that more than anything she’s a little overwhelmed by the outpouring of love in the best way:

MC: [Overwhelmed with feeling; touched, a little shy, embarrassed, but also full of joy--my eyes burn at the edges with tears] “I'm glad everyone approves c:”

Comte: Agreed :> your country/homeland has a nice custom. A v important step to inviting my loved one into my life as my wife :>>>>

So it then cuts to them in Comte’s room after the circus and MC thanks him for the sweet confession in front of everyone, tells him how happy it made her. He insists that it was only natural he would, and that it isn’t even enough.

Comte: “I am the one...your life, your time as a human being; I'll be taking all of it from you.”

MC: [...Comte? He took my hand with a very serious expression]

Comte: "As I said before, I will make you a vampire someday."

MC: “Don't call it that--a price. I want to live with you too!”

MC notes that while she hasn’t made the leap yet, she knows she’ll be ready for it soon enough. 

Comte: “Thank you. But the last thing I want is to take things from you, I want to do everything I can to make you happy, to make you smile. Whether that means weddings, requests--anything in my power.”

COMTE REALLY SAID "she is entrusting me with her future and that means I have the responsibility of not only ascertaining her happiness, but proving my unwavering devotion to it" AND IM HOLLERING????? LADIES GET YOU A FUCKING MANS. MC finally begins to understand this, and she’s like OMFG is that why you went off so hard this afternoon???? And Comte’s like :>>>> guilty as charged, though I think I'm also just still excited about the wedding too, haha! They hug it out (YESSSSSSS LET ME H O L D) and MC asks him again if there’s anything he wants for the wedding too. Aight y’all I would be irresponsible if I didn’t warn you beforehand, get fucking tissues. I’m still upset abt his answer and I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL. He thinks about it for a bit, before kissing her forehead and saying “I suppose, can you pray for my happiness too? That's enough."

AIGHT IMMA GO BACK TO THE EVENT IN A SECOND BUT I GOTTA SAY. BITCH. BITCH ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME????? COMTE THAT ISN’T OPTIONAL THAT’S A GOD DAMN PREREQUISITE?????????????????? OFC WE WISH FOR YOUR HAPPINESS WHAT THE FUCK??????????????? THE A U D A C I T Y. I’VE NEVER BEEN MORE INSULTED IN ALL MY LIFE. OKAY RANT OVER.

MC is surprised but naturally agrees to it, having wanted that for him even without prompting. She continues to think on it, insisting that she wants to do something for him too. An idea sparks but it only says that she made preparations without telling him anything for now, preparing a tangible sign of her love for the wedding.

The premium end begin here. She’s getting dressed for the wedding, and she’s--as usual--in awe of his perfect selection of accessories/jewelry to go with the gown. She’s about to put on her shoes when she notices something odd, and there’s a knock at the door. Comte enters to ask if she’s ready, and they both freeze and stare at each other. They both sheepishly admit to being completely taken with the sight of the other, and they laugh about it together. Comte tries to ask if she’s ready again, and she assures him that she is--just that she found something unexpected in her shoes.

He explains that the coin is an English six pence. Sebastian told him that they are no longer made in her time, and Comte explains he acquired it about three hundred years ago in England when he was living there (he says that he kept it back then because he liked the design on it). He explains that there is a tradition, that the English would put a six pence in a bride’s left shoe in the hopes of wishing her good fortune and prosperity in her oncoming union. MC has her understandable and customary (JESUS I FORGET HOW OLD THIS MAN IS SOMETIMES) and he places a hand over hers that’s holding the coin when she starts staring at it. 

Comte: "Hey, MC....Time goes by, and various things will continue to change. Among them, it is only vampires who survive without dying or changing."

MC: "Comte..."

Comte: "I used to think that made it--made us--empty. But...I don't think that's the case anymore. I'm proud of being able to keep this undying, unchanging love for you."

[He put the coin back in my left shoe, and offered them to me--gentle as though they were made of glass(Cinderella's)]

MC spends this exchange on the verge of tears, but keeps it together for the wedding. It depicts their loved ones all around them as they walk down the aisle, and skips to the end of the ceremony. The priest tells Comte he may now kiss the bride (WHEN I WAS TRANSLATING IT SAID “KISS YOUR BUSINESS” AND WHEN I TELL YOU I WHEEZED), but just as he’s about to lift her veil--she stops him in his tracks. He’s confused, and says her name, but she reassures him that she just wants to offer him a wedding gift before he lifts it. Hidden in her bouquet are two pins that she had made, and she pins them to his jacket. They were made from preserved flowers, encased in metal to render them undying/everlasting. 

MC: [Me too...I want to wish for your happiness...]

MC: “For you, things might feel fleeting--like they just pass you by, are lost before you can grasp them. But even so, my feelings won't change; just like this preserved/undying flower and the life of a vampire--dedicated to [Comte's real name] in everlasting love."

COMTE.EXE HAS CURRENTLY SHUTDOWN. REBOOTING.

MC notes that his eyes get misty and he leans his forehead against hers.

MC: [Comte's real name]? 

Comte: .................I want to hug you as tight as I possibly can, but I'd hate to ruin the flowers/your gift to me

BITCH WHEN I TELL YOU I SOBBED. WHEN I TELL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 1. I CANT GET OVER THE FACT THAT HER GIFT IS NOT ONLY CANON BUT ITS LITERALLY ON HIS WEDDING SPRITE, HER LOVE IS A VISIBLE MANIFESTATION ON HIS PERSON ALWAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2. THE FACT THAT SHE ONLY ADMITS TO BEING THE HAPPIEST SHE CAN BE WHEN SHE SEES HIM SO HAPPY TOO. THIS IS SO MUCH. SO M U C H

And so Comte lifts her veil and kisses her gently uwu cover ur eyes chirren, the hall erupts in raucous applause and the crowd starts congratulating them!! Comte then encourages everyone to have fun, and the reception takes on the vibe of a kind of social gathering. MC notes that he seems to prefer this level of interaction, just relaxed and everyone chill, and she turns to tell him that it seems like it’ll be fun! Before she can finish her sentence, he kisses her fiercely before leaning back with a sigh, "It's still not enough, but I'll save the rest for later tonight." BITCH!!?!?!??!??!? HOW THE FUCK CAN ANYONE FOCUS ON A STUPID PARTY WHEN YOU SAY SOMETHING LIKE THAT, HELLO???????MC notes: [Everyone from the mansion that saw the kiss made fun of me endlessly, and I hid my face in my bouquet] SAVE HER. Once again, it skips to the end of the reception and they’re now in Comte’s room. (I will blink twice if I think you need tissues BLINKS TWICE) 

Comte: "Yup, perfect." [He places the flower pins I gave him next to THE hourglass in the room, looking pleased HNGNNGNGNNGGNGN MY EYE HOLES ARE SUFFERING

MC: "I'm glad you liked the gift c:" 

Comte: "It is proof of your unchanging love, of course I cherish it :>"

She’s just so happy to see him so delighted with it. He asks how she liked the ceremony, and she gushes about how much she loved it. He hugs her (AWWWWWWWWWWWW) and then he notes that while it was fun to celebrate, all he wants now is time with his wife (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA). He starts kissing her like the world is ending, and she says she needs to get changed--but he doesn’t care, says she’s fine as she is and that he wants her right now.

Aight usually I don’t get into epilogue territory, but honestly, this shit was JUST too good. Now this man made of magic asks MC if she’s wearing her bridal garter (you know, the one that usually comes with the whole bride ensemble in Western tradition). And she’s like ???? Uh, yeah, of course? Why... He says that he saw something interesting at a friend’s wedding reception once upon a time, and explains that the garter is usually removed and thrown to the bachelors (analogous to the bride’s throwing her bouquet, and whoever catches it will be the next to get married). PLEASE NOTE HE IS KISSING HER FOR LIKE 90% OF THIS IT’S AMAZING

MC: "So it's like the bouquet toss?" 

Comte: "Yes. Now then, how did he remove the garter...?”

HE DUCKS DOWN AND SHE’S LIKE COMTE!?!?

Comte: “...Ah yes, the groom removes it with his teeth >:D”

And so this man HAS THE TIME OF HIS LIFE tugging it down slowly under her dress, caressing her legs and loving every part of her. MC’s face is on fire, and she’s torn between being turned on and embarrassed. Eventually he reappears after teasing her MERCILESSLY and admits that he didn’t do it at the reception because he didn’t want anyone else to see her reaction. Blushing, shy, desirous--all of these feelings are his to keep and enjoy. (I!!!!! LOVE!!!!!!!!!! HOW SUBTLY POSSESSIVE HE IS AAAAAAAAAA) MC notes internally that she feels the same way about him, how he only shows this intensely passionate side to her. Comte is uncharacteristically impatient and frenzied that night, and they both go at it.

It skips to midnight where the two are cuddling in the aftermath, just being cute and happy. Comte, the absolute MADLAD is already thinking about how to celebrate next year--and she just giggles at him (he’s a wackadoo but he’s her wackadoo LMFAO MOOD) and he laughs with her. They essentially swear to promise their love over and over in the future, and it just ends on that wholesome note :>>>

Also can I just. The fact that he lived for so long alone, but was always, always paying attention to all of these little things that are done with a person’s loved one ;-; that he would remember his friend doing that at his wedding and be like BROOOOO I WANNA DO THAT IF I EVER GET MARRIED!!!!!!!!!!! I just. It’s so heartbreaking and touching at the same time, I just want to hold him forever ;-; the fact that he doesn’t seem to worry as much about his own happiness, seems absolutely floored that MC would do anything in return. I JUST LOVE HIM WITH EVERYTHING INSIDE OF ME 

THIS IS WHAT PEAK PERFORMANCE LOOKS LIKE

[pyrotrolls]

have i ever shared my headcanon for the subjug church shit?? no here i go 

this got longer than i meant to but theyre not totally solid but firstly

carnival and circus are different!!! 

the carnival is non-religious, actual stage done performances where guests of any caste are welcomed to visit and partake. it can be violent or not, depending on the carnival. These people are carnies, not necessarily clowns, and not always purple.

BUT Circuses are Carnivals that a Church is behind. It’s Carnivals but there’s a religious side to it. Every show someone’s getting sacrificed. Circus has become synonymous to Church, but differ because they are putting on performances but instead of doing it for the audience, they’re doing it for the Messiahs. These are Clowns, and usually everyone is purple blooded.

Church is not as “showy” , it’s private and these have rituals for just themselves in their own halls. not the same juggling kind of nonsense though. more gore. These guys are Subjugs, wrongfully called Clowns. Although they still worship by wearing face paint, you dont see as many colorful variations, and usually the paint is “scarier” looking. basically goth clowns that are violent and don’t do juggling shit. These guys work with the Empire, and believe ONLY purple blooded trolls have been bred for the role of acting as enforcers to the Empire and the Messiahs. 

Circus Church and Plain Church still both worship the Messiahs, but think differently on their approach, where circuses think the Messiahs want flash and style, the Subjugs think its about causing violence/pain in it’s truest form and upholding the Laws as enforcement to the Messiahs will. Believing the Messiah and the Empress work together. And its their job to ensure the status quo is upheld.

While the Circus Church is more Messiahs Focused and doesn’t respect the Empress as an authority figure in their Religion as much. State and Church separate deal. 

Both recognize the Grand High Blood as a direct voice to the Messiahs.

Although the Grand High Blood would consider himself a Subjug, a true believer, and not a performer like Subjugs tend to think of clowns. 

Clown is considered insulting to Subjugs who don’t perform for the Messiahs with “carnival tricks.” But Clown became the popular terminology and more recognized as Circuses took hold and drew more purplebloods to join instead of law enforcement. It was a more colorful “fun” option of worshipping the Messiahs than strict but bloody rules. This started a huge divide in the Church. 

POFEIR’s Church takes the no-clown approach, but ignores the Empire as an authority figure, and doesn’t recognize the Grand High Blood as a direct link to the Messiahs. They believe in caste equality, but think the Messiahs call for blood and violence and war, and in general is basically Fight Club. thanks for coming to my ted talk. Sometimes he calls it a Circus to entice followers, but really despises being called a clown, but a lot of his followers do it because its just the more known term. He doesn’t want to be called a Subjug either, and prefers “Seers” or simply “Followers”

I headcanon there is a lot of different branches to the messiahs though.

[leecravesdeath]

tattoos and tea in the early morning (boboxx)

on ao3 if preferred: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27062932/chapters/66075682

hi! this is the first thing i have written for any fandom since maybe 2016/17. i am 100% aware that this isn’t great but i had fun with it so i guess that’s good enough for me :) hope you enjoy!

summary: Scarlett is out for the night with their friends when they meet Juice in a bar. When a drunk Priyanka proposes they all get tattoos, Scarlett invites her to come along too. 

just to clear it up: Juice is Julia and Lila is Lemon

Scarlett wasn’t sure they believed in love. Sure, they knew it existed, but they had never really experienced it for themself. And right now, if they were being honest, they thought they would probably never feel it. Love wasn’t particularly prevalent in Scarlett’s life; the countless amount of one night stands they’d had was enough proof of that. Of course, it could be argued that, yes, Scarlett had experienced love but having a girl naked in your bed just isn't the same as spending time with friends and family. That was unflawed logic that none of them could really argue with. 

 Everything they thought they knew about love went out of the window in favour of the girl with the funky nickname. Blonde hair that fell just past her shoulders paired with crystal blue eyes and a small smile as she stirred the straw in her drink at the opposite end of the bar. Something about her was just enthralling and Scarlett felt the urge to introduce themself. Julia was new and different, and it was good. The good sort of different that Scarlett knew that they would definitely miss if it left as quick as it came. 

 “Hey,” Scarlett said as they took a seat next to her.

“No cheesy pick-up line?” she asked as they shook their head, “ that’s a shame. I’m a sucker for a bit of stupid.”

Scarlett thought for a moment before responding, “ how’s this one: your lips look lonely. Would they like to meet mine?” 

“oh my gosh! That was awful,” she laughed, “how many times have you used that one?” 

“Never, you’re the first,” they winked as she laughed again. Scarlett would never grow tired of hearing that laugh, even if they only had tonight to listen to it. 

 Scarlett doesn’t know how it happened, but not even thirty minutes after meeting, they had the smaller girl against the bathroom wall of the sweaty club. The two were so focused on one another that they barely registered the door opening and a ditzy yellow-haired girl walking in talking faster than Julia had ever heard anybody speak, “ Pri said we’re going to get tattoos, you in?”

Scarlett looked at the yellow girl in confusion for a moment, their mind still wrapped up in the embarrassed blonde who stood across from them. “Uh yeah sure, you want to come?” they asked, hoping she would agree. Joy and relief washed over them as Julia said yes. In retrospect, Julia was infinitely glad that she had decided to say yes that night, even if she was left with a weird tattoo. 

 After a dramatic number of tears (all from Lila of course), the 5 of them had a reminder of the night permanently etched on their skin. Some of them played it safe, getting something small and cute, but the same couldn’t be said for Kiara and Priyanka who both now had a Quebecois curse word and the current day’s date respectively. Lila got a small lemon in honour of her nickname; Julia got a flamingo drinking a juice box and Scarlett got a tiny clown face due to her love of the circus. Was getting a tattoo in the middle of the night really the best idea? No, of course not.

 As everyone began to disperse and go home, Scarlett worked up the courage to ask her to go home with them. Julia agreed, her voice sounding as sweet as honey and Scarlett knew they would never get sick of hearing it. 

 “Before we go in, how do you feel about dogs?” Scarlet asked as they reached to unlock their apartment. 

 “I love dogs. I have one at home with my roommate!”she exclaimed in excitement. The prospect that Scarlett had a dog was amazing as she was definitely getting more of a cat-lady vibe from them. 

 “Perfect!” Scarlett all but shouted as they let them both into the apartment, their dog sleeping soundly in the corner. 

 They wandered into the kitchen area, telling Julia to make herself at home as they went to boil some water in the kettle to make them some tea. Scarlett wasn’t much of a tea drinker; preferring something with a caffeine boost like coffee but it was far too late for that so chamomile would have to suffice.

 When they re-entered the room, they found Julia browsing over the shelves against the wall that were filled with books, movies and photo frames. Scarlett was usually pretty private about her life, preferring to spend nights away from home rather than bring people back to their apartment. When people did visit, they hid the sentimental items, not wanting their friends to see the vulnerability that they housed. But something about Julia was like a breath of fresh air and Scarlett felt like they were open and exposed, the air mingling inside of them. But for once, they didn’t hate the feeling. 

“That’s my mom and sister at my graduation,” Scarlett told her unprompted as they saw which picture she was looking at. 

 “You look really different without the green in your hair. I almost didn’t recognise you,” Julia joked with a soft look in her eye, “you’re really pretty,” she concluded with a large smile, moving on to look at another picture. 

 “Thanks? You are too,” They complemented, causing a small blush to work its way across her face. 

 “Is that Lemon and Priyanka?” she asked through a giggle as she looked at the picture of the three girls dressed in halloween costumes, Lila looking significantly smaller than the other two as the picture captured her mid-fall. 

 The two of them spoke for hours, conversation varying from what they did for work, hobbies they had all the way to future plans. The chamomile tea that was made earlier in the night now sat forgotten on the coffee table as they slept uncomfortably on the sofa, a soft blanket draped over them both. Scarlett was pleasantly surprised to see Julia still in their home when they woke up only hours later. The smaller girl shifted a little bit before waking up. The sudden movements and quiet noises of discomfort were enough to alert Scarlett’s dog to come rushing over to the sofa where they resided. 

 “Morning,” Scarlett greeted Julia as they gave the dog the attention he so desperately wanted. 

“Good morning,” she responded in an almost questioning tone through a yawn. Julia wasn’t much of a morning person, she much preferred to stay awake until the early hours of the morning and then wake around midday if she didn’t have work. 

She left at around 1 pm, promising to send pictures of her dog. After countless hookups, they chose not to believe people when they say they’ll text later. So Scarlett sat in waters of uncertainty as they waited for a potential message, trying every method possible to distract themself. When the clock hit half past four, a message finally came through from Julia. Attached was around five pictures and an apology for it taking so long. It was safe to say that it was totally worth the wait, each picture being more adorable than the last. But Scarlett would be lying if they said their favourite wasn’t the one with Julia in it too. As they typed a response to Julia, a different notification appeared.

 Priyanka: y’all remember that tiny girl too right?? the one who left with bobo?

 Lemon: yeah i walked in on them in the bathroom together...

Priyanka: ew

[haiqyu]

"I've finally found you."

If you haven't read the first part, it's here >> Part I

Kuroo Tetsurou x F! Reader

Soulmate and Reincarnation au! : one gets flashbacks of their past lives when they reach the age of 10

Angst? Fluff? It's a mess

Warning: suicide mentioned

Sorry for the grammar mistakes and spelling lmao don't read this please 😔 it's embarrassing

"I hate you."

The words spilled out my mouth carelessly. I did mean it. He caused me so much pain and I've been haunted by the torture for years. I deserve to feel hatred towards my soulmate. I've only received beatings after beatings in every dream and flashback. For years, I've been so scared about falling asleep or having flashbacks. Excruciating pain. Sadness. Accused. That's all I felt.

However, why do I regret saying that phrase? I'm only speaking the truth. I blamed it on the soulmate mechanism. I should feel relieved and glad that I get to say this to my soulmate. I should be hating my soulmate. I should feel hatred and anger. Why do I feel the opposite that I should be feeling? Why do I feel regret? Why do I feel love and sympathy for my soulmate? Why do I feel bad?

My tear-filled eyes glanced at his face. He looked sad and hurt. His eyebrows furrowed. His eyes screaming with love and longing. His mouth parted so slightly, small breaths of hot air condensing when exposed to the cold winter air. His hands reached out towards me. He looked like he was ready to run towards me and catch me in his warm arms.

My heart beating quickly, it was trying to tell me to go to him. My heart screamed for the warmth of Kuroo. My heart wanting to be in the arms of the man that I've been with for generations. However, my mind told me to run away as far as possible. Kuroo... Is a bad person. I decided to go against my heart. I immediately turned my back on him. My knees buckled. I took off, with the cold and bitter winter air hitting my frozen face.

"wait! (Y/n)! Fucking-" I heard him yelling from the distance. His voice gets further and softer every second I ran.

I didn't know where my legs were taking me. I just ran. I hope it is far enough not to face the soul mate I just rejected. My face was cold. My lips were cracked. Tears streaming down my face, wetting the white scarf that I tucked snugly around my neck. Mucus were escaping from my nose. I must've looked gross.

My legs carried me to the park near my house, at least I knew where was I. I slowed down and I sat down on an empty bench under the shade. With the cold wood of the bench touching my legs as I sat on it, I shivered. I placed my bag down beside me and took out some tissues to wipe my tears away and blow my nose.

I must've made a scene in school. Now I looked like a fool. A clown. A whole circus. I couldn't face anyone in the school anymore, not even Kuroo. I ran away from my soulmate. Society would look down on me. People would be so disappointed. They don't understand me. They don't understand the pain I went through for years.

I rubbed my puffy red eyes with my cold freezing hands. It was really getting hard to see with my eyes so swollen. I shivered again. The cold was really getting to me. Shifting my bag onto my lap, I hugged it tightly.

I stared into the blue sky. I just looked up for a few minutes. I spaced out. I needed to get my mind off this tragic situation. My eyes wandered around my surroundings. What am I waiting for? Should I go back home? Should I go back to school? So many choices, yet my body doesn't want make a decision and move.

I sighed and I looked down at my feet. I hummed a random tune, with my voice breaking of course. I stopped and stared off into space again. My eyelids were starting to droop down. Cold... Tired... I want to sleep and never wake up... Sleep... Coma...? Footsteps... Black hair... My vision went black.

Kuroo ran after me. He immediately ran after I took off. As a volleyball player, you expected him to catch up with me quickly. However, since he was carrying a bag of volleyballs and his heavy bag, accompanied with his winter outfit, it was hard to ran as quickly as he could normally.

He huffed and managed to catch up by following me. He knew the direction towards the park well as he and Kenma walked around his park to hang out after school several times. He walked around the park, trying to find me. "(Y/n)!" he called out. His footsteps hastened.

He finally spotted my head. He sighed in relief. He brisk walked towards my direction. He lighten his footsteps as he didn't want to scare me away. He also didn't want to chase after me anymore. Slowly walking towards me, he saw me dozing off on the bench.

My head was only supported by my bag. My arms wrapped out it tightly, trying to trap as much heat as possible. He quietly sat beside me, wrapping his warm long arms around my shoulders. My eyes shot open at the sudden weight and I flinched. I immediately noticed the guy that I didn't want to meet beside me.

He quickly grabbed my arms and trapped me on the bench. His head lying on my shoulder. His face at the crook of my neck. His soft and messy hair tickling the sides of my face. He hugged me tighter. "hear me out, babe."

I flushed at his nickname for me. It flowed out from his mouth naturally. It was like he said it to me millions of time before, technically he did but this was the first time we actually met in this life. "stop." "go away." these phrases escaped from my lips multiple times. I tried to push him away, it was useless. After a few seconds of trying, I knew his grip was too tight and I couldn't escape again.

I sighed. It's either I avoid the situation or I face it. I decided to be a big girl now, facing the problem myself and not running away. "o-okay." my voice cracked.

I felt his warm breath on my neck. He rubbed his thumbs on my arm in a circular motion. It was comforting. It felt normal. I felt so loved and warm. But I snapped out of what I was feeling. Be angry, (Y/n).

He started. "I'm... Sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you like that. I didn't know the other side of your story. I was hot tempered. All emperors are hot tempered, by the way. I acted rashly. The concubines accused you for cheating on me. I was foolish enough to believe them. I should've believed you. I missed you a lot. I shouldn't have did that to you." his voice started cracking as he continued his speech.

His lips quivered. A knot formed around his throat, making it harder for him to speak. "I dreamt and i had flashbacks of you being tortured. I was mad at my past self. I was extremely foolish. I had flashbacks about dying a few months after you died. I... Committed suicide. I couldnt bear the pain. I was alone. I regretted everything I've done to you. The flashback of me committing suicide replayed over and over and over. The pain of knowing that you've been tortured due to my selfishness was more overwhelming than the pain I inflicted on myself. I know it's hard for you to forgive me, but please... Give me a chance."

He choked back his tears. I felt his gripped getting tighter and tighter every second. My heart and mind were in a mess. Feeling guilty, I didn't know he had such terrible flashbacks too. I thought I was the only one that had the receiving end of the torture. I regret saying the three words to him. I should've listen to what he was going to say first. I was indeed a fool.

"it's not your fault, (y/n)... It was mine. Please, I beg of you. Please forgive me. I love you... " he cried.

His words pierced through my heart. I couldn't say the sentence back. I didn't know what to do. I couldn't speak as well. A similar knot formed at my throat as well. I just waited a few minutes to pass by, letting him calm down.

I was extremely dizzy. It was so overwhelming. I didn't know what to do that this point. I just don't want to exist. I slowly let go of my bag, grabbing one of his cold hands that was on my other arm. I grabbed his freezing fingers, signalling him I wanted to tell him something.

"I... want you to change my mind. I'm willing to try and love you... Again. " I spoke softly.

His head shot up and he smiled. His eyes brimming with hope and adoration. His smile was so handsome. It really do fit his face well. "thank you, (Y/n). I will make you fall in love with me again." he whispered to me.

We were in our own world. Our own private and safe world, which no one can enter. Little did he know, I lied.

I already fell in love with him from the beginning when I met him.

----

Thank you so much for reading! It felt really rushed but I've tried my best cause I had no time. Haha,,, :')))))))

- jen