#i should be more disappointed in myself really

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

In response to the Mile High Job post, I hate that Parker implies that poor flight attendant slept her way to a promotion/better shift. Her day is super weird but her cat is fine and her life is saved. That rumor, however, might stick and that didn't really feel like Leverage to me.

Agreed!

The thing with Leverage is that it's a show from the late 2000s; it feels contemporary, but actually it is a bit dated. And, like all shows, it had some problematic elements, which get a bit more Obviously Problematic as time goes by (I am just waiting for someone to write a lengthy call-out post in 5 years' time and for the Discourse to start.) For example, Tumblr loves to declare that Leverage has a "canon" throuple, but if anyone read that and then watched the show they would be profoundly disappointed - while it's a fantastic ship with a great many shippy instances, Elliot has a lot of onscreen No Homo moments, and frequently is shown sleeping with random women (I personally read him as aromantic). Similarly, there are two big relationships in that show: Nate/Sophie, and Parker/Hardison. And we all wax lyrical about the brilliance of Parker/Hardison and how healthy it is, and for good reason; but we gloss over how unbearably "I hate my wife/father I cannot click the book" Boomer humour Nate/Sophie is.

(He literally calls her a shrew in one episode. She throws a tantrum and sulks if he doesn't remember the exact details of how/where they met. She's stereotypically 'romantic' and he's stereotypically 'cynical' and she has to Save Him From Himself, and he self-deprecatingly says he should just know when to stop arguing because she's always right. Like... it is a grubby and uncomfortable dynamic; but, it's also aimed at a different segment of the audience that is older than me, and that's okay, actually. It just means I don't much care for the ship myself.)

Anyway, this is one other such instance. Clearly someone in the writers' room thought that was a funny joke, and not enough people disagreed, and so in it went. What's nice is that Sandi McCree, who plays the other flight attendant that stays on the plane, actually kind of saves that joke for me with her performance. When Parker first boards and declares that her co-worker is not coming in, McCree looks disgruntled at the sudden change to her staff list when she wasn't informed; she's annoyed at management. Then Parker makes the sleeping-with-pilots comment, and McCree looks disgusted and furious -

An expression she then pulls at Parker every time she sees her for the rest of the episode, even when Parker is technically not doing anything particularly weird. It's not necessarily intentional on McCree's part (Parker IS very weird in this episode, so it very much can be a response to that), but to me it means you can read it as "This woman is absolutely furious at the lateral sexism of this white girl because We Love And Support Each Other On This Plane." So, for me, between that and the aforementioned revelations of the day (the plane was brought down by the domestic terrorists of a Fortune 500 company, but saved by... a few unexplained Official People who snuck aboard??? And the other flight attendant was made to miss the plane after all under mysterious circumstances and was not promoted??? What???), I don't think Sandi McCree's character wouldn't put those pieces together.

[springgirlshowers]

Let Me Show You

Summary: You haven’t been feeling very pretty lately, Joost decides to prove you wrong, and he won’t let you finish until you admit that you are.

CW: negative self talk/self image, tiny bit of crying, body worship, teasing, praise, so much foreplay, fingering, cunnilingus, edging, orgasm denial, overstimulation, i use google translate for dutch (im sorry 😭)

WC: 2827

A/N: i wassss gonna wait to post this, but i couldn’t help myself it feels wrong to keep the world waiting </33 challenge: take a shot every time the word “kiss” is said in this fic

You hadn’t been feeling well at all today.

Not in the sick with the flu sort of well, more of just not feeling well with yourself. Not feeling content with yourself.

It started in the morning, when you stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror. Joost was already gone, needing to stop by Teuns to clean up a few songs.

You leaned forwards in the mirror, analyzing your face. Feeling disappointed at it, for some reason, it felt like every single tiny little flaw was extremely noticeable. Every blemish, every bump, every pore, it all felt so much more noticeable.

You pushed at the apple of your cheeks, then leaning away from the mirror to look at your body.

You turned to the side, looking at your stomach and squeezing the flesh. Dropping your arms weakly as you continued to stare at yourself.

You felt ugly. You hated it. You wanted to crawl out of your own body.

Since that was impossible, you threw on a matching pair of gray sweats. Then curling yourself into a ball under the sheets. Hiding away from the world.

About three hours later, you heard the door unlock and the sound of shoes being kicked off. Joost called out your name, stopping once he saw the sight of your back and head on the bed, the rest of you covered up by the duvet.

He knew you were awake, it was only a few minutes after 3PM.

He walked over to your side of the bed, sitting on the edge and smiling at you as he stroked your hair. He could already tell from the look on your face that you were upset.

“Hey, what’s going on?” He spoke softly, eyebrows knit together in concern.

“Nothing, I’m just a bit tired.” You shrugged, Joost let out a breath through his nose, seeing straight through your lie.

Joost was your lover, of course he knew the difference between a tired expression versus a gloomy expression on your face.

“I know it’s not that, schat. Something’s bothering you.” Your eyes darted away for a second, you were trying to decide if you should keep up this act of just being “tired” or be honest.

“It’s really nothing, Joost.”

“You keeping whatever it is bottled up is only gonna make it worse, liefje. Trust me, I would know.” Joost tutted, rubbing your thigh.

He was right, you would know as well. You’ve told him the same thing before when he’d be upset about something.

"I just..." You sighed as you sat up, already feeling embarrassed about your upcoming confession. "I haven't been feeling very pretty lately." Joosts face turned into an immediate frown.

"How? What's not pretty about you?" He sounded almost insulted, insulted by the fact you would think so negatively about you.

"My face looks wrong. My body looks wrong. I’ve got a tummy on me. I don't know. I don’t know how to explain it exactly, I just don't feel attractive." You sighed, dragging your hands down your face.

“We all have a tummy. I’ve got a tummy.” He poked his stomach, smiling looking at it and then back up at you.

You shook your head as an amused smile spread on your face, you pulled the duvet off the rest of your body due to the heat becoming uncomfortable.

“You know what I mean, Joost.” You silently groaned and put your face into your hands.

“I do. But I don’t care.” Joosts voice was smooth as he removed your hands from your face, your eyes were already watering, he let out a sympathetic hum.

“You might not think it. But you’re the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen.”

You knew Joost was telling the truth. Anytime he would look at you, he felt like he was looking at an a real life angel sent by God himself.

You were just too far deep in the rabbit hole of your negative self talk.

Tears began to slip from your eyes and you turned your head away, Joost still had his hands cupped lightly around your face.

“I’m sorry. You know I don’t look pretty when I cry.” You sniffled, wiping away tears with the back of your hand. “My face gets all pink and blotchy.”

Joost gently turned your face back to him, taking in all your beautiful features.

“I love your face. Even if it’s all pink and blotchy.” His words got a small laugh out of you, he grinned .

“You really think so?” You asked, voice still shaky.

“I know so.” He wiped away another tear from your cheek with his thumb. This was cliché, but you loved it. You loved him.

“I can prove it to you, if you want?” Joost raised his brows, you knew exactly what he was suggesting. You nodded happily.

He quickly put his lips against yours, kissing so passionately. So sweetly.

“I wanna make a deal, ja?” Joost said in between kisses. You nodded.

“I’m gonna show you how beautiful you are.” He kisses the corner of your mouth. “I’m going to tell you, show you until you know it’s true.” He kisses the other side. “And then…you’re gonna tell me how pretty you are, then I’ll make you cum. Ja?”

“Joost..” You mumbled out, flustered already.

“You okay with that deal?” He kissed your lips gently, brushing some hair out your face.

“Okay. Okay. We have a deal.” You giggled, eyes closing.

“Good.” He smiled, the type of smile that made you feel like you could melt straight into the sheets. He kissed you one more time before moving his lips along your jaw.

He moved his hand, rubbing his thumb softly over your bottom lip.

“You know how much I love your lips.” He ran his mouth along your jaw, before moving to hover his face over yours.

“And your nose. This cute little nose.” He gave you a peck just on the tip of your nose, tapping it after and making a little boop! noise.

His antics got a small sniffle and laugh out of you. God, he was so silly. So unserious in such an intimate moment like this. You loved it. It made your nervousness fade away.

He moved to kiss both your eyelids next, so silly.

“Your eyes, I could stare into them all day if you didn’t think it was so creepy.” He chuckled. “Zo mooi. Ik zie je gezicht in mijn dromen.” He whispered, quickly moving his mouth to your neck. Your breath hitched as he placed sloppy kisses all over it.

His mouth ran over that sweet spot that made you let out a soft whimper, you could feel his smirk against your skin.

“Mijn mooie meisje.” His breath against your neck tickled, making you inch away from it.

His hands began to slide underneath your baggy sweatshirt, sliding up and down before going up one last time and bringing your sweatshirt with him.

He soon did the same with your sweatpants as he moved his lips along your collarbones, you lifted your lips to help remove them. He tossed them on the floor, along with your top.

He pulled away from your skin to look at you in complete awe. You were a bit embarrassed due to your extremely plain underwear, you didn’t bother to put on a bra this morning. If you knew you’d be getting intimate today, you would’ve worn something nicer.

Yet Joost didn’t care, his face didn’t care at all. Still staring at you like you were a dream come true. You were.

“Can’t believe you’d want to hide such a gorgeous body like this.” He grazed his fingers down your arm, grabbing your hand and lifting it up to your mouth, kissing your knuckles.

Your hands came up unconsciously to conceal your chest. Joost didn’t let this happen. He intertwined his hands with each of yours, holding them against the mattress.

“Aw, no hiding. I wanna see these pretty tits of yours.” You bit your lip and turned your head away, surprised at his explicit words.

He quickly brought his lips to your chest, kissing all over it. Between the valley of your breasts, above and below them. Finally placing his mouth on one of them.

A sharp gasp let out of you, Joost chuckled against you. Sucking and nipping at your breast, leaving red and purpling hickies.

He took your nipple into his mouth, making you squirm and arch your back slightly, he moved one hand to your other breast. Squeezing and playing with it for a little before switching his mouths attention to that one.

He didn’t need words to tell you how much he loved your tits. The messy kisses from his mouth were enough.

He ignored the way his dick was hardening in his pants at the sounds of your whimpers and breaths of pleasure. This evening, he was focusing on you, and you only.

He trailed his lips down, stopping at your stomach. He dragged his hands down, sliding them to the sides of your waist and squeezing, making you shiver.

“You know how much I love your tummy. I can’t count the amount of times I’ve fallen asleep when I lay my head on it.” He pressed a kiss just below your bellybutton. “Such a cute stomach, I don’t get how you could be so embarrassed of such a beautiful tummy like this.”

You weren’t sure how your stomach could be beautiful. But then you remembered all the times you thought the same about Joosts, going insane over the sight of it.

“All day all I do is want to hold you. I dream about it when I’m away. Did you know that?” He looked up at you, he looked like a goddamn dream.

You shook your head and he gave you a dramatic pout.

“No? I guess I should’ve told you sooner.” He moved his hands and squeezed your hips, another giggle escaped you.

He trailed small, slow, pecks above the waistband of your underwear. Soon hooking his fingers underneath and pulling them down your legs. Kissing your thighs as he did so.

He parted your legs with gentle hands, letting out a coo of adoration at the sight of you. You blushed and bit your finger, turning your head to the side.

He brought a tattooed hand back up to the side of your face, turning your gaze back to him as his thumb smoothed over your cheek.

He smiled at you with a face of pure infatuation. Not needing words to say how he felt about you once again.

He leaned down, eloping his lips around yours as you brought your head up from the pillow, pushing into the kiss.

A finger came up to your clit, gathering your wetness, you let a shaky breath into his mouth.

“It’s okay.” He smiled. Making a beeline of kisses all the way down until his mouth stopped right above your clit.

He held onto your thighs, bringing them up and squeezing the plush of them in his hands, bending your legs.

“Oh, so soft. I’d live in between your legs if you let me.”

“Naughty boy.” You giggled.

“Just being truthful.” He shrugged, he watched in adoration as he rubbed his middle finger in between your folds, his finger already covered in your slick. “Prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen.” He cooed.

He carefully inserted his finger inside you, staring at your face with a smile, watching how your mouth parted, eyes fluttering.

He came back up as his finger slowly pushed in and out, watching your face up close as he inserted a second finger.

“You ready to tell me what you are? Hm?” You tried your best to look at him as you let out a whiny moan. Which was your way of saying “Not really.”

“No? Then I should stop here, ja?” His fingers slowly began to pull out.

“Nononono. Pleasepleaseplease.” You breathed out, grabbing his hand to keep it from fully pulling away. He let out a defeated sigh.

“You’re lucky you’re so stunning. I’ll let you get away with it for now.” He kissed your cheek.

You let go of his wrist as his fingers began to pick up their pace once again, your eyes fluttering shut and mouth parting will small gasps.

He moved his mouth back to your chest, sucking at your tits, leaving little lovebites, you knew you’d be covered in red and purple marks by tomorrow.

He continued that same pattern of kissing trailing down until he reached your cunt.

“Cmon liefje, I need you to tell me how beautiful you are.” He rubbed his head against your thigh.

You shook your head as you bit down on your lip, eyes squeezing shut, you were already close to an orgasm.

“Hm, if you’re not gonna tell me, then I guess we’ll stop here.” He shrugged, puffing out his bottom lip as he removed his fingers from you.

“No!” You whined out at the sudden emptiness, cunt clenching around nothing. “Joost, you’re being mean.” You whined, hips squirming.

“Mm, I’m being fair. You tell me you’re pretty and I will let you cum.” He flicked a finger quickly against your clit, he grinned at the way your body jerked.

“Just admit what we both know is true.” He said in a sing-song voice. You rolled your eyes, frustrated.

“If you just tell me then I’ll give you want you want, liefje.” He teased again.

“Fine. I’m pretty.” You mumbled, you saw the way Joosts face perked up.

“Speak up schatje, I cannot hear you.” He could hear you, but he wanted to hear you loud and clear.

“I’m pretty.” You said, much louder this time.

“How pretty?” He cocked his head in a mocking manner, resting it against the plush of your thigh as his fingers slowly increased their speed.

Was he really doing this? Bastard.

“Really pretty. Fuck- I’m really pretty.” You said through shaky breaths.

“Ja, keep going.” He encouraged, licking a stripe up your cunt as his fingers pumped into you, and you whined again, he loved how flustered you looked.

He was eating you out like a man starved, his tongue deep and swirling circles around your clit, you weren’t even sure you’d be able to speak any coherent words.

“I’m pretty. God, fuck- I’m really pretty, Joost.” Your back began to arch off the bed, your hand reaching down to grip his hair as he hummed against your core.

“I’m so pretty, Joost. So so pretty, please. I’m beautiful, god. Fuck. Please, I’m pretty.” You begged, repeating it like it was a mantra. This was exactly Joosts goal.

“Dat klopt.” He pulled away from you to praise, his breath fanning against your cunt before he attached his lips back to it, beginning to suck on your clit.

Joost held onto your hips to still them. Your legs began to shake and the moans leaving you were borderline pornographic, loud and dramatic. But they were real, not forced.

“Joost, please, Joost. I’m pretty. Please can I cum? Please?” You begged, tears forming in your eyes. All the teasing before this made you so sensitive.

“Go ahead.” The vibration of his voice added to the pleasure, his fingers curled inside you, hitting that sweet spot.

Finally, finally you were cumming. The waves of your orgasm crashing over you, the intensity making the tears in your eyes fall and trail down the sides of your face. Joost continued as you rode through the aftershock, squealing and crying out as your grip on his hair tightened. He moaned against your dripping core.

He finally pulled away once your moans became raspy and you were squirming around. His chin covered in your wetness while he had the most prideful cheesy grin on his face.

“Mijn prachtige meisje. You did so good. So good for me.” He whispered against your skin, pressing small kisses all around your pussy and onto your thighs. Your body twitched with each peck, already overstimulated from all the teasing he did.

He crawled back up to hover over you, wiping the tears that fell with a gentle hand. A saccharine smile on his face to match the saccharine kiss he gave you next. You were still so shaky and out of breath, eyes droopy as you looked at him.

“Feel any better?” He ran his fingers through your hair, scratching at your head, you leaned into his touch.

“Yeah…actually. Yeah.” You gave him a puzzled smile, not expecting this to actually work.

“See. I knew you’d try for me.” He smooched your forehead.

“I’m really sweaty, I need a bath.” You laughed, still breathless.

“I’ll run you one.” He sighed playfully, knowing that your words were a request.

“Will you carry me?” He let out another chuckle, shaking his head in amusement before scooping you up bridal style.

“I can never say no to you.”

[weirdsht]

Disillusioned 17 . Heterogeneity (2)

a/n: my body's crashing but midterms are ending soon so hopefully I'll be able to sleep

tags: implications of torture (squint really hard to see it), yandere-ish if you squint, Cale is unconscious again

English isn’t my first language so there will be grammatical errors

Pls don't repost my work anywhere without my permission

Constructive criticisms and any kind of interaction are more than welcome

Requests are currently closed but my ask are still open (read pinned)

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_____ was walking down in the halls just outside Cale’s room. With nothing better to do after talking to Rosalyn, they decided to go out and help Pendrick heal injured soldiers outside. 

However, not 10 steps in and a certain red-haired man is shoving them back into the room they came from.

“What are you doing out? You should be lying down.”

Surprisingly enough, it’s Choi Han who spoke up and not Cale.

“Even if you heal fast there’s no way a wound that severe has fully closed up.”

The swordmaster had a look of disapproval on his face and _____’s poor heart just dropped. Never in their life had they seen Choi Han this disappointed with them.

“What did you even do yesterday? We still don’t know what happened.”

Cale tucked the healer in bed tightly as if they didn’t wake up just half an hour ago. _____ tried to get back up again but thought against it when they saw how the golden dragon was guarding the door with Choi Han guarding the end of the bed.

“I really don’t need to rest more, I swear my wound is almost healed.”

“Almost healed is different from fully healed. You will stay in this bed until we go back to the underground villa. I won’t take no for an answer.”

That shut _____ up.

However, the silence did not last long.

“Start explaining what the hell happened yesterday. Choi Han told you that you told him about how you discovered something.”

Cale sat at the end of the bed. Meanwhile, Eruhaben moved to sit on the couch with Choi Han taking over his place to stand at the door.

“Huh? Oh yes, it was also back when you guys went to Paerun Kingdom.”

The healer forgot for a moment about what they did yesterday. Mind too clouded by the things they talked about with Rosalyn earlier.

“My powers work like a transfer right? Oh right, Eruhaben-nim didn’t know, I’m sorry. So usually I would absorb someone’s wounds or whatever and then I would give and multiply my vitality right?”

Eruhaben started wondering how he got surrounded by so many unlucky people before his death. However, no one in the room knew about his thoughts.

“It got me wondering if I can do the opposite. You know, transfer and multiply my wound and then get their vitality or something along those lines.”

“Huuu”

Cale couldn’t help but sigh and pinch the bridge of his nose.

“You do know that this wasn’t what Ron meant when he told you to create something of your own, right?”

“It wasn’t? But isn’t it still a good idea.”

“_____-nim… that’s not…”

Choi Han started wondering why his serving two self-sacrificial young masters. Just like with the gold dragon, no one else knew about his thoughts.

“Yes, I know… Rosalyn-unnie already scolded me about it. I’m really sorry, I won’t do it again.”

“And what exactly are you sorry for?”

Cale’s gaze looked as though he was ready to get disappointed by whatever the healer was about to say.

“No really, I know what I did wrong this time. I’ll try not to put myself in danger next time. I’m really sorry for worrying everyone, I know I acted rashly.”

“Try?”

Eruhaben’s voice rang out for the first time since they got inside the room.

“I mean it’s a good ability… I was just unlucky this time because that half-dragon got away before I could steal some vitality… Plus, wouldn’t it be super helpful? Like imagine I have just a tiny cut but when I transfer it to the enemy it can become a lethal wound.”

While Cale is glad _____ is more lively and doesn’t act like a puppet anymore, he's not happy about this newfound stubbornness. Where did the healer even learn it from? But just like the other two men, no one else knew about his thoughts.

The commander doesn’t want to restrict the healer’s movements or freedom. Not only would it be annoying to have to constantly look after them, but it would be similar to how they used to live when they were with the Perduellios.

But at the same time, this discovery is dangerous when left alone.

“Haaa, you’ll only use that ability when it’s an emergency or when I allow you to. Unnecessarily use that power again and see if Beacrox will prepare any more desserts for you.”

Not Beacrox’s desserts, _____ loves those.

The crestfallen healer only nodded in agreement. But honestly, they don’t fully understand why everyone is acting as though they have no self-preservation. It’s not like they won’t heal. Did everyone miss the part when _____ said they can absorb another person’s vitality?

If there’s someone in their group who has no self-preservation it’s gotta be Cale, not them.

True to Cale’s words _____ didn’t get to help out in anything for the remaining time they were in Caro Kingdom. Every attempt of theirs would get shut down by everyone. The healer thought it would get better after they fully healed.

Yes and No

After resting for a bit in the super rock villa, _____ has been allowed to go back to their regular duties. However, Cale stuck the healer to him like glue. From war battles to stealthy operations to more battles. From the Caro Kingdom to the Roan Kingdom to the Western Continent to the Empire. No matter where Cale went _____ is with him. 

Well, not like _____ has a problem with it so they just let it be.

Plus they know that if they want, they can ask Cale anytime to leave them in Leeb-An City or the underground villa.

But they didn’t because just as it eases Cale’s mind to have the healer with him (not that he’d admit it), _____’s mind is also at ease whenever they are with Cale.

Or so it was.

If _____ hated Adin and the White Star before, they loathe them now.

"I-I don't understand, his body is completely fine. I have also replenished his energy however he won't wake up."

It’s been more than a week since the day Cale fainted. Yet he still showed no signs of waking up. To some extent, the healer could tell that the redhead’s body needed rest from overexerting.

But almost two weeks?

Who wouldn’t worry?

The only silver lining to all this is that it gave the Medicus some time to ponder about their feelings. Gave them time to think as to how they’d handle this garden called love whose flowers are blooming more and more in _____’s heart every day.

Ultimately they have decided to not do anything.

What _____ has concluded these days is that the form of love they want to give is support. For them that's what love is, supporting your loved ones even if he's unaware of their feelings. Being there whenever he needs them and expecting nothing in return.

And that’s exactly what the healer did.

They helped in any way they could. From healing the injured to helping with the paperwork. Sometimes Rosalyn and Raon had to remind _____ that they must rest, that they were overworking themself, and that the matters of the empire could wait until they got some rest.

_____ tries their best to listen. However, they would be seen doing the same thing again two days later.

“Cale seems to have like-minded people around him. Are you also not interested in a noble title?”

Alberu and  _____ are sitting across from each other. Both working on their own pile of paperwork.

“Under no circumstances was I ever interested in such things Your Highness. However more than that, I believe it would be unfair for our citizens if the Perduellio’s rise again when they got such a light sentence.”

The crown prince nodded in understanding. As someone who is always thinking about what’s best for the kingdom and its citizens, he could tell where the healer is coming from.

However, there’s a mistake in what _____ said.

A light sentence? That’s far from the truth.

Even thinking about what happened to that family sends a shiver down the quarter Dark Elf’s spine.

The official statement for what happened to the Perduellios is that the entire family have been stripped of their title and all their assets have been seized by the crown. As far as everyone knows they are now somewhere living as peasants.

But isn’t it weird that no one has seen them?

Cale has been… looking after them, for the lack of a better word. Alberu may not know the full story but he surely knows the extent of the young master’s anger.

He low-key wishes he could erase from his mind the condition of that cell and its inhabitants.

“However Medicus-nim, are you aware that you can’t live in hiding forever?”

Alberu pushes his other thoughts away. Why bother dwelling on them when only he, Cale, Tasha, and Beacrox know what happened? For now, he’ll focus on this paperwork and his conversation with the healer.

“Very much so your highness. I have lived my entire life hiding. What is a few years more?”

_____ paused for a second to take a second look at the document they are currently reading.

“However your Highness, the same thing cannot be said for you. This is prime time for you and the other Dark Elves.”

Alberu lets out a hearty laugh at that.

“Of course Medicus-nim. Yet you got one thing wrong. This is also a prime time for you. Worry not as I will surely allow you to live as Roan Kingdom’s Medicus once more. Consider it as my reward for putting up with a certain redhead.”

_____ tried to deny it. Tried to say that they did not need such things. Nonetheless, Alberu did not relent. He and Cale had already agreed that they would let this poor healer live out their life after being used like a tool since childhood.

Plus the blonde is seriously getting tired of Cale ranting about how suffocated _____ is having to wear a mask all the time even if they don’t complain.

"It's fine to be greedy sometimes you know? Sometimes it's all right to take whatever it is you want."

Alberu did not look at _____ as he spoke. Instead, he's looking at the unconscious commander on the luxurious bed.

_____, who understood what the crown prince meant, felt embarrassed. Their face turned into a light hue of pink as they thought of a retort.

However, Alberu did not let them do so. He simply motioned over to the healer with his glance before continuing the paperwork in his hands. _____ followed suit, and soon the room was filled with silence again, the only exceptions being the rustling of papers and their pens scribbling.

bonus-ish: sometimes I can't help but comment while I'm wrting lol

[azrielsshadows42]

A Court of Scales and Fire VI

A/n: The story should start to speed up from here, umm, but I have found myself in a bit of a predicament, I have no idea how to introduce Everest to the other characters, so if you guys have any ideas, please don't be afraid to let me know.

Word Count: 4161 And I know nobody cares but, my character count for this (Including spaces) was exactly 22222

Warnings: Swearing, Eris hate from the ic (Inner Circle), protective Cassian, Eris is a bit of a prick, snakes, over-thinking

Dividers by @tsunami-of-tears

Italics = thoughts

Bold = Draconic

Both = Telepathic communication (Colour will vary)

Y/n's Pov

I stood there a little stunned at how blunt Eris had been. That's ridiculous, you'll stay in Autumn, track them down and then I shall assist in getting them back to Elethairia. I was expecting more of a back and forth you know, like I don't trust you! You don't have a choice! My Court, my rules! My mission, my inhibitions, I'm going there with or without your permission Fire newt! Then we'd have a few rounds insulting each other, Cassian would cheer me on and eventually I'd have to get all up in his face like Listen jerk face, I don't care who you are, I've got a duty to fulfil, and you're not gonna stop me! Then, like a total badass, I would walk out onto the pavilion, Everest would fly into view in slow motion behind me, so it looked like I was the one with wings at the right angle, I'd jump of, land on Everests back and we'd ride to Autumn against the sunset.

I may have taken some creative liberties with that last part, but it would've been really cool if that did happen. While I was busy imagining how the interaction should have gone, everyone was looking at me. "Sorry, did you say something? I zoned out" Disappointed Azriel noises "Y/n" My focus went to Rhysand as he spoke to me, his expression was solemn. Who the fuck died in the five seconds I disassociated? "It's your choice, whether you choose to stay in Autumn or not" Oh, I did

It took me a second to realise they actually wanted me to give an answer, while they were all looking at me which I think is a little inconsiderate, who can make a decision with that much pressure? 1, 2, 3, 4 Fi-, five pairs of eyes just waiting for your response. Granted Amren wasn't actually looking at me, but her presence is intimidating. She should honestly count as three pairs of eyes all on her own.

On to more serious matters, I do need to decide if I stay there or not, staying there would be more convenient for me, and them, no one would have to winnow me there and back, but from my training I know that the main Autumn building is the forest house, which the majority of it is underground and is heavily guarded thanks to the former High lord's paranoia, perhaps that had changed since Eris ascended the throne, but I don't exactly feel like taking my chances with him. Being underground meant no windows that Everest could use to sneak in.

Ev, what do you think?

I think we need to find them and get home, I'll stay out of trouble See, I want to believe her, really, I do, but she doesn't have the best track record.

You know that Fire Newt is a High Lord, right? Specifically, the High Lord of the place we need to be in, meaning you can't do anything to him for attacking me despite the proximity. Judging by her grumbling lack of commentary, I could tell that was exactly what she had planned to do.

Fine. I promise I will not bite, scratch, hunt, or burn him. Nor will I drop him off a cliff, because according to your stupid high fae laws, that somehow counts as me killing him, even though gravity is clearly at fault, making it natural causes. She knows that's not how it works, but Everest has been adamant that cliff dropping should not count as murder ever since I explained to her that someone buying the last salmon while we were there to buy some doesn't count as stealing.

"I'll stay in Autumn" I could see Cassian tense in the corner of my eye. Rhysand and Feyre looked to each other, communicating through their bond. They locked eyes with me simultaneously which was a little unnerving, Rhysand was still unsure about me but I could tell that despite her mates worries, Feyre believed that I was telling the truth by the look in her steely eyes as she said to me "Be careful, he's dangerous, sleep with one eye open"

I began to wonder if I'd just made a deal with the devil. What exactly had Eris done to make them all react this way? Even Azriel hiding in his shadow puddle tensed at the High Lords offer. I got the feeling that he didn't like me very much, neither did Rhysand which both made sense, but I just felt like Azriel's dislike for me ran deeper.

Despite this, he still didn't like the idea of me going to Autumn and that raised my guard more than anything. "I'll send word to Eris, in the meantime, you should start preparing" There was a strange ominousness to his words that crawled up my spine. What the hell am I getting myself into?

-Time skip, 2 days-

Each member of the inner circle had come to me to give some kind of warning or bit of advice, all of it ran along the lines of, be careful, he's dangerous. Other than Cassian of course, whose advice was "if he tries anything, fuck him up and come here, we'll create an alibi for you" And while that plan would be ineffective, it was funny and soothed some of my anxiety knowing I could count on him if shit went south.

Today I would be willowed to Autumn. Oh, during the two days of preparations I learned it's called winnowing, not willowing and I have been saying it in my head wrong the entire time. I personally prefer my version, but I digress.

Everest was not particularly pleased with this development and demanded that I wear something she could hide in to avoid having to take a trip more than halfway across the continent. I wore a fur coat that was a little baggy on me for her to slip in, she hid around my neck with her tail curling around the top of my arm.

Rhysand walked in with Feyre on his arm, both dressed impeccably in distinctly Night Court attire. "Are you ready?" His voice was deeper than usual, just slightly, already slipping on the mask to speak to Eris. "As ready as I can be"

Rhysand would obviously be taking us there, Feyre was coming for diplomatic reasons, which as far as I've observed meant that Feyre told Rhysand she wanted to go as well, and he was all too happy to hang the stars for her. After about an hour-long argument, it was decided that Cassian could join for, as he so stoically put it 'my protection'. As if the sparring we'd done the past two days, and my years of training and experience wasn't enough.

Rhysand winnowed us there in the blink of an eye, and it was only as I felt Everest's claws dig into my shoulder that I wondered if he could sense her with his magic. I had put on a glamour to mask her magical signature, but I was unfamiliar with winnowing, would he feel her presence? It seemed either all my worries were for naught, or he was a good actor, for once we reached Autumn, he made no comment.

We all approached the entrance as one, I could see Fire Newt and another fae standing there. The High Lord was looking at my coat as if it had offended him and panic struck through me at the thought that he might sense her.

"High Lord Eris, General Madoc" Rhysand greeted them cooly, Feyre standing by his side mimicking his almost bored expression while Cassian stood like he thought the leaves were out to get him.

Eris greeted his fellow High Lord and Feyre, but pointedly ignored Cassian and I. The tension hung thick in the air as silence broke out, I almost flinched when Cassian shifted his footing making the leaves crunch. Everest moved, accidently tickling my neck and I masked it as a shiver, though thankfully Rhysand had chosen to break the spell that had befallen us.

"I expect updates on any progress, and we will be back in a week to ensure Y/n's well-being, there will be consequences if she is harmed here" The threat in his voice was clear. Just like that, they were gone, and I was left with Fire Newt. I should probably start calling him Eris in my head, otherwise I might call him 'Fire Newt' out loud, which I don't really wanna do. Actually, yes I do, but not while I need to be on his good side, I can call him that to his face when I'm back home.

The silence was becoming awkward as I waited for him to say something. "There is a room waiting for you. You are to settle in then join me at dinner so we can discuss a course of action" His words were clipped, as if I was making him late for something.

Eris turned swiftly, his coat flaring out behind him, but Madoc stayed in place, so I wasn't sure if I should stay, or follow. I was about to ask but small dainty footsteps sounded from inside. A lesser fae with a furred orange tail appeared in the doorway shyly, her head was bowed, and her dress was covered in stains. "This is Daphne, she will show you to your room, if you need anything, she will bring it to you"

She gave me a small smile and then started walking down the hall to a grand staircase. The entire floor was carpeted in red with golden embroidery, torches lined the walls giving it that homey glow, like candles. The walls were a dark spruce colour, and every door was had intricate engravings of different things, trees mostly, but some were of the woodland creatures like foxes, squirrels, and swans, it was beautiful but also, eerily quiet.

The entire way I had seen not a single other fae, the loudest sound was my foot falls, it felt like I'd stepped into a vacuum so nothing could be heard. Daphne stopped in front of a door with an autumn leaf, she opened it, motioning inside.

The room was furnished nicely, it had a four-poster bed with entirely too many pillows and a blanket draped over the bottom, it was so so soft. The room did in fact have a window, tinted with red, orange and yellow, giving the evening light that shone through a few extra tones. It was smaller than my room in night, I was actually a little thankful for that, it didn't seem as hollow. There was a desk with an obnoxiously fancy quill in ridiculously expensive ink and a velvet chair lay before it. A little gaudy in my opinion but was certainly better than what I was expecting.

I had honestly forgotten that Daphne was in the room until she cleared her throat softly. "Is there anything you need?"

"No, no everything is perfect, thank you, Daphne." She nodded her head politely and left the room on silent feet, closing the door behind her. Not even the hinges made a noise in this place. As soon as the door had closed, Everest wriggled out of the coat, immediately exploring the room, the thing that interested her the most was the ornate lamp, carved in the shape of a tree with more tinted glass as a covering to act as leaves that sat on the bedside table.

Everest landed on it, her claws making a soft clink as she did. She lay down, absorbing the heat it radiated, her scales slowly shifted colour, melding to the shades of the lamp until she looked like she was part of it. Show off

Everest's only response was a happy, satisfied purr as the lamp warmed her stomach. I looked around some more, opening the cupboards and drawers. Autumn clothes both male and female were there, ready to be worn. The dresser contained a small assortment of jewellery and clips. A brush made of acacia laid neatly on the right side, a comb on the left.

It was not long before a knock landed on the door. "Lady Y/n, I have been sent to tell you that it is an hour before you are expected to be at the dining hall, your servant will show you the way when the time arrives." My servant? Does he mean Daphne? Was she really expected to be my servant? Her hesitant demeanour made sense now.

I don't know about you, but I'm hungry, and I highly doubt I'm invited to dinner, I'll have to catch my own food, again.

You realise you're a dragon, right? You're supposed to catch your own food.

Everest growled at that. You realise you're a fae, right? You're supposed to be my food.

You don't like the taste of fae, you prefer other meats, but you'd rather eat exotic fruits if given the choice. I shot back.

Just shut up and primp, you have a prince to seduce. She teased. I saw the way he looked at you.

So did I, he looked like he wanted me dead. He's a High Lord, not a prince, and I'm not going to be seducing anyone. It didn't matter what retort I gave, she had already dived out the window, blending in with her surroundings and closed her end of the bond.

I didn't have time to question Everest's where she found that particular line of thought, I had to figure out what I was going to wear to dinner. After going in circles for a good five minutes, I knocked on Everests walls.

I need your help to pick out an outfit I heard her long, drawn out, suffering sigh reverberate through our connection.

Fine, go ahead.

I don't know whether I should wear Night court clothes, Autumn court clothes, or my armour.

...Does it matter?

Of course it does! They may have an alliance, but it is strenuous at best, so wearing Night court attire might be disrespectful. If I wear Autumn court clothing, there might be a traditional way to wear certain things, and wearing it wrong could be offensive, or worse, he could think I'm trying to mock them. But if I wear my armour, it could be seen as a threat. Now do you understand my predicament?

No, not in the slightest, you're such an over thinker, making everything so unnecessarily complicated She closed her side of the bond again, more firmly this time. Cassian was right, courtier work sucks.

I was about to start undressing myself when I got the feeling I was being watched. A tingling sensation from my upper back travelled up my neck, down my arms and to the tips of my fingers. I recognised that feeling, a smile broke out on my face as I opened the window. "Night Shade!" My two snakes, Night and Shade, named after the plant their venom was made of, slithered inside. "By the mother, I've missed you guys, my arms don't look like they're mine without you there." I offered both my hands to them, and they climbed up, crossing over each other behind my head, before coiling themselves around my arms, once again merging with my skin to become tattoos.

I'll wear Night court attire, that's what they like best, and they've had to travel a long way to get here. I knew that technically, they're not alive, they don't need food or water, they don't tire, and they don't have minds of their own, they're made entirely out of magic, but I'd made personalities for them in my head, and based on that, they preferred Night court clothes, it matches their scales.

Eris's Pov-when Y/n arrived in Autumn

I stood outside the forest house beside Madoc, the past two days could not have gone by any slower. I had gotten a response from Rhysand a mere hour after my proposal, what in the name of the Mother could she have needed to pack that required two DAYS to do it?

It was early evening now, the sun had just started to set causing soft shadows to be cast across the ground like blankets. Rhysand winnowed in with Feyre on his arm, both dressed like they were going to a sophisticated event instead of a three minute drop off. Had to give it to them, they had style, though it was dulled by the company they kept, the brute followed along slightly behind the witch, looking around like he expected an ambush.

I knew Rhysand made sure there was space to walk up to him as a power move, so that they could take their bloody time strolling up to the doors with bored expressions to grate on my nerves, and any other time, it would have, but right now, I was very thankful for the few moments it afforded me.

The witch wore a fur coat, white and grey with flecks of black, I assumed it was to fight off the Autumn wind, and she looked beautiful, but it didn't suit her, it gave her skin an ashen tone that I did not like. There were much better alternatives for warmth, like me, for example, I could warm her much quicker and much more effectively than that poor attempt at comfort.

What am I thinking? I thought the strange thoughts had ended in Night, this needs to stop, now. I greeted Rhysand and Feyre, ignoring her and the brute, I accepted his demand for updates and barely registered his threat as I noticed the witch shiver in my peripheral vision and chose to be ignorant of the way my hand twitched toward her, convincing myself it meant nothing.

Rhysand and his company left, it was just me, her, and Madoc. I stared at her, wondering if it was too late to send her back, call it off, anything so that she wasn't staying near me, making me act a fool.

"There is a room waiting for you. You are to settle in then join me at dinner so we can discuss a course of action" I tried to keep my voice professional, like how I talked amongst other High Lords, but it came out too curt, too harsh. Anything I said would just fuck things up further, as I had apparently lost all control of my vocal cords, so I left, striding quickly to my bedchambers.

My pace slowed once I reached my door, it was engraved with two baying hounds and a small acorn in each corner. I slipped inside, feeling like an imposter in my own home. I leaned against the door breathing deeply, trying desperately to get my thoughts in order.

Once my heart was beating at regular speeds I got up and started shuffling through my armoire (Fancy French word for a closet). I spent the better part of thirty minutes pulling out different cloaks and shirts, laying them flat against me to see what would look best to Y/n. Not that that mattered of course, I wasn't trying to impress her, merely appealing to my audience.

Madoc knocked on my door, reminding me that I had an hour left to get ready. I had chosen a dark under shirt with gold buttons, but I had yet to choose what should go over it. I considered the one with golden fire embroidery but decided against it, thinking it might make me seem juvenile, flaunting my abilities about, she knows very well what they are. Wearing the celebratory one would be entirely too flashy for a dinner, so I ultimately decided less was more, choosing one of my simpler over coats but no less elegant.

I finished prepping myself, making sure there was not a hair out of place. Madoc greeted me at the door to the dining room, and we walked inside. A smaller table had been moved in, seeing as it would just be the three of us, I didn't want the Lords bombarding her with irrelevant questions, many of them were firmly stuck in their ways and would scoff at the idea that a female could be useful beyond cleaning and child rearing. I took a seat at the head of the table, Madoc to my left, and a seat for the witch was left open on the other end. The room felt very empty without a large table to fill it. Traditional Autumn foods filled the table as she drew near, the massive arched doors swung open slowly.

Once she entered, the torches flared, the distance made her look small, details blurred, but I could still clearly see that her outfit originated from Night, my jaw tightened at the sight. I could see matching snake tattoos coiled around her arms, the rest of their bodies hidden beneath her dress. They reminded me of the snake under the mountain that had seemingly come from nowhere and bitten me, it sent a creeping feeling up my spine to my neck where the serpent had sunk its fangs into.

As she got closer, this dress admittedly suited her much better than that dreadful coat, aided by the firelight, her skin now looked warm instead of ashen. "High Lord, General" We both nodded back to her, and I motioned toward the empty seat. Once she was seated, she folded her hands over her lap, waiting for permission to begin eating. "Please, help yourself"

I tried desperately to ignore it, but I couldn't help but take notice of what she did and did not select. The mashed potatoes and roast beef along with the tangy coleslaw made it to her plate, but not the steamed broccoli or baked gem squash. She prefers savoury food. We eat in silence, it was a little awkward but not terribly tense, once finished I sought more information.

"Exactly what weapons are these people smuggling from Elethairia?" She looked up at me and our eyes locked for the first time tonight, it sent tingles through my traitorous body and my heartbeat picked up.

"They've been smuggling all sorts of weapons for centuries, but what we are concerned about is the newest ones, a type of stone that can store magical energy, problem is, some of them don't have a limit, but the more magic stored inside, the more unstable it is."

"How come you are only concerned about it now?" It seemed suspicious that this was suddenly a problem, why hadn't anything been done about it before?

"Like I said, they've been doing this for centuries, they've gained experience and size, they have more than one base of operations and apparently the guy who runs it is scary enough that they'd rather live a life in prison or die than talk. It feels like fighting a hydra, you stop one and two more show up."

Depending on how many they have, it could be extremely dangerous, people are still recovering from under the mountain and Hybern's war, having explosions everywhere will make this worse, the court can't handle much more, Beron really did a number on these people. If only I'd been stronger, gotten rid of him sooner, stopped the tyranny so fae could hope again, stop fighting each other for the scraps Beron dangled in front of them. This is my fault, and I will fix this.

"I plan to find the shipment, and bring it back to Elethairia where they can be activated in a safe place so that no one can use them"

"What about the fae responsible, what is to happen with them? Are they supposed to go free?"

"They can be dealt with later, the main priority are the explosives" My face hardened. She was planning to leave them here where they could harm Autumn civilians while she ran off and played hero?

"I promise, once we have the opals out of their hands, I can come back and assist with arresting them, but they've already desolated one of our larger towns, almost five thousand died, I think you can see why this takes precedence. You can decide how they are to be punished seeing as this is all taking place in your territory."

Yes, begrudgingly, I could see why obtaining the stones was more important than obtaining the people, and the sooner one happened, the sooner the other could follow. I nodded showing that I understood. "Will you be needing anything else?"

"No, all good, everything is ready, and I'll be out of your way as soon as possible" My heart clenched and tugged at my insides to do or say something to prevent it. I found that I once again had no control over the words coming out of my mouth.

"Perfect, we can start first thing tomorrow" She froze, and even Madoc looked to me in question

"I'm sorry, we?" Too late to turn back now.

"Yes, We"

ok, hope that was good, but I have a question, do you guys like that I colour code the mind speak dialogue? I originally did it cause I noticed I had a lot of unseparated dialogue, and it might get confusing, but I now realise it also might be distracting.

Taglist: @imma-too-many-fandoms @rcarbo1

A/n: Did anyone get the game of thrones reference right at the beginning?

[kimtaegis]

I’m feeling quite sad about how much the active bts fandom on tumblr has shrunk and/ or how selective the community has become regarding content interaction. I’ve heard people pointing out a clique-building here lately, and while I’m well aware of closer mutual circles existing – and I can only speak on behalf of my friend group here – these pretty much develop naturally when there’s just no one else who reacts, reblogs from and talks to you anymore except for these handful of people. I don’t like that some people perceive these “cliques” as “exclusive”, for example to content creators only. that’s bullshit; it’s certainly not great to have only other cc’s support your work because they personally know how much time and effort it takes. also, knowing how lovely most of these people are, you’d get immediately followed back and showered with love too as soon as you’d even show a speckle of kindness on a regular basis, regardless of whether you make gifs yourself or not. ccs dedicating sets to each other isn’t a sign of exclusivity, but rather us holding onto and appreciating people who still give us at least some motivation to create and post in the first place anymore, because there’s quite literally no one else left by now.

[marshmallowgoop]

Repostober Day 30 | October 30, 2008

The first episode of Wakfu premiered October 30, 2008! These are a few Wakfu pieces I drew in 2011.

[hamthezombie]

I've been playing Wargrove on the Switch for the past few days and I was kind of waiting for it to become fun and after like 2 or 3 hours I think it's time to accept that this might just not be the game for me.

Which sucks because I love the art, and I love the IDEA of the simplified Fire Emblem-like battles. But it's just not doing it for me.

[justanotherghostwriter]

.

[reploidbuddy]

TIL writer’s burnout is a thing and I recognize myself in the symptoms ;-;

[thefirstknife]

The destiny reddit is an absolute warzone right now. Do yourself a favor and avoid it like the plague

Oh no. I saw a lot of negative comments overall and while I understand where they're coming from, I think at some point, some people should calm down.

I mentioned some of the issues I had with the campaign and I stand by them, I think some of this stuff definitely felt rushed and that we're sorely lacking basic information to understand the plot. But I can get over that if it's fairly reasonable to believe we'll find out eventually (and it is) and if the rest is solid. And to me, the rest is solid.

I know people have issues with strand taking too much time from the campaign, and I get it. But also to me, strand being such a huge part of the story made the campaign feel more personal and invested for US, the Guardian. To me, that was the point. I do wish the campaign was a bit more expansive, perhaps another mission or two would've been perfect imo. An extra mission could've delved into the history of the Veil and what it means. It's a legitimate complaint that I share, but also some people online have been expressing it... rather explosively.

I'd also add a counter to my own complaint; when it comes to the plot about the Veil and the Witness and the Traveler, it's clear that this isn't the end; it's a setup. Everything that happened here we can learn about retroactively in a month or six months or a year. It may suck because it's content for THIS expansion so we want to know now, but it CAN be explained later.

But strand? Strand can't. We have to learn it NOW. We can't get strand and then have a really cool personal discovery quest about mastering it in a month or six or a year. So if they didn't have time to fit another two missions into the campaign, it's fairly obvious what is being cut.

Is it clumsy? Yeah, definitely. I definitely feel like some crucial information has been deliberately cut away and removed, possibly waiting to be delivered during the year to prepare us for The Final Shape. I'm not a fan of that method, I would prefer a solid chunk of lore about the current story to be delivered in the current story. If anything, then for clarity. Especially because the majority of the players will not be waiting around to read 15 lore tabs during the year to figure out what's the Veil. A major expansion should be self-contained.

But for the love of god, some of what I've seen online is basically some players acting like we have E.T. (1982) on our hands. Like, I agree that there's issues and I've spoken about them and I can do it again at any point, but at the end of the day, I had fun and the good stuff was good. Literally my only true complaint is that it feels like a mission or two are missing. Pretty much every problem I have would've been solved with that. But that's an unknown amount of extra time of work so I cannot make a comment whether they could've done that or not. I will assume they couldn't so they didn't. Generally don't like assuming that they did it maliciously because then we go into dev harrassment territory.

[butts-bouncing-on-the-beltway]

I think I've been touchy lately about my feelings of access to/participation in generativity. I've been feeling really overwhelmed lately by how much needs doing and how much disparate but necessary information I'm keeping in my head. I should probably get back into my thought maps for the work on the yard and house, because I think that will make it easier for me to empty my head when I'm not actively trying to work on something.

[camelspit]

succumbing to the demons and dnfing a book for the first time in years 😔

[steakout-05]

i was thinking about how it took me a while to figure out i'm aegosexual (which basically means that there's a disconnect between yourself and being the subject of attraction) and i thought about how much i really dislike and just cannot see myself in slash reader fics. i tend to dislike these fics for multiple reasons, but some of them include that the reader self insert is usually really boring, has no personality outside of being lovey dovey and isn't unhinged enough for certain characters for reasons outside of contrasting personalities for my tastes (like spamton for example, why are you writing a normal protagonist to pair with fuckin spamton of all characters). but another reason is that i literally cannot connect myself to the reader self insert. like i cannot imagine myself in their place at all, it's always another stand-in that i imagine instead and thinking about myself in their place makes me uncomfortable. i can't see myself in their place because i don't see myself as a subject of attraction, and i'm repulsed to that idea. so i imagine someone else instead because that's better to me. and also because of the aforementioned reasons that have more to do with the writing of the self insert, i just cannot imagine myself acting the way the self insert does because I Personally Would Not Fucking Do That™. like i would not be romantically kissing a guy on a date, i would be infodumping about my special interests for 3 hours and then start ranting about how funny cars are while he just smiles and nods lmao

this is why i've never really self-shipped with any character. like i can be attracted to them and be like "i wanna hold his hand/kiss him/do inexplicable things to his psyche", but in reality i could never actually see myself as a subject of attraction by this character, so i'd either ship them with another character i like or imagine a sort of stand-in that has some of my traits and lives out my fantasies but still isn't me. i can fall in love but i can never connect because ew that's gross and weird. watching from the sidelines by reading fics and looking at fanart about characters being shipped with others and being intimate with each other is more my cup of tea.

[systelon]

it feels kind of weird being an artist that mainly draws animal people n anthros & that being the main kind of thing people usually come to my page for, but not being able to relate to like most of the furry community in general (specifically when it comes to art + kind of characters i draw)

[todayisafridaynight]

twitter having 'national girlfriend day' trend tonight is so funny like how did they know i was thinking of masato

[fenniefrost]

I think one of the hardest things in my life is having so much love and respect to others to the best of my ability. And knowing, through painstaking hardship and abuse, that for certain people, no amount of love, care, understanding, or respect towards them will ever make them treat you the same in return. No amount of love or attempts at understanding will be enough for certain people to heal, grow, or change their ways.

There are some people who exist, that no matter how much you give them unconditional love and respect, will still believe they should have the right to hurt you or take your rights away. And honestly, I will never understand. Their attempts to turn me into someone hateful/fearful like them never broke me, and I still believe in the hope that love exists. The only thing that changed was that I love myself enough now to not tolerate them hurting me anymore. And I hope anyone else with a kind heart also finds peace knowing you weren't the problem. You tried your best. And you deserve to be treated with kindness too.