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#i still care for her tho n want the best for her
noxtivagus · 2 years
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time to rest c:
#🌙.rambles#i am done w my assignments for the week#i have a lot next week too tho so imma work on that after i rest >.>#yk aside from this one long time friend of mine#that makes me feel like i'm never listened to or appreciated#i love her but god it feels so draining talking to her at times#i love helping her but. it hurts bcs sometimes i just feel like i'm being used bcs i'm your dependable n reliable bestie 🥹#i still care for her tho n want the best for her#but she's the type of friend that#hmmm i think it's with the way she manages her energy#she's not really much of a writwr#or open with communicating#so at times it's hard to tell if they actually care about me or am just grateful for the help i give#since she's usually the youngest she usually ends up following what others do#ah i'm worried bcs she's the kind of person that . avoids stuff T_T#she doesn't really accept help from others n she's v sensitive to criticism#n the person she talks most w her rn. he definitely likes her but i'm worried bcs they seem to hold each other to#a higher than realistic standard. a bit unhealthy but#i've realized she has a pattern of idolizing things. she doesn't acknowledge their faults#i care n love her still since she's a friend but#wah i dislike it when ppl don't acknowledge mistakes ;; lack of self-awareness is definitely a red flag for me so 🫠#wait j wnded up rambling n went off track#i write. so much in my notes#wah i still feel v sick rn ;w; i was playing ffxiv for a bit but maybe i'll actually rest now#she's really mostly the only friend i have rn that greatly drains me#bcs she mostly takes but doesn't really give. for years. it gets tiring#sigh i dislike convos where it feels rather shallow. but she's still my friend#it's so tiring. everyone grows at their own pace tho. i just wish i knew more similar-minded ppl
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coco-loco-nut · 3 months
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Father’s Day
pairing: max verstappen x reader
summary: max is dating an international star
a/n: i literally had this idea last night and had to write a short blurb, i promise i am writing other stuff tho 🫶
masterlist
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y/username happy father’s day, daddy. i love you and your big…
maxverstappen1 anything to share with me?
y/username not pregnant, just letting everyone know how turned on you get me
maxverstappen1 love you too, schat
user12 anyone else not getting it, like she is so hot and he is 😬
y/username you know that one barbie scene with the rock? that’s my maxie. also if you think he’s ugly, that’s fine, more of him for me 😍
user98 Y/N BARBIE FAN CONFIRMED
y/username priority 1: old barbie movies priority 2: max
user3 ON THE MAIN?
user33 PR monster got her, I really wanna know what she was about to say
recordlabel we don’t… we actually want bleach for our eyes
redbullracing we will share our bleach if you send us demos of her next album 👀
charlesleclerc Go on, finish the sentence, I dare you.
y/username his big heart, ego, ass, trophy case, therapy bill from childhood trauma, i could keep going on but i don’t want to make you feel emasculated
user62 okay, but like how did he bag her?
y/username he has incredible rizz, and look at him🤤
“Happy Father’s Day, Maxie,” you grin as Max lays on you lap, looking up at you with his beautiful blue eyes.
“You aren’t pregnant, Schat,” he laughs, your fingertips gently scratching his scalp.
“We could change that, get some practice in for after the wedding?” you watch his eyes widen as he quickly sits up.
“Practice makes perfect, why don’t we practice now?” Max suggests, picking you up and carrying you to the bedroom.
Your wedding is small, only some close friends and family in attendance. The ceremony takes place in your backyard, no reception beyond a dinner afterwards.
Despite both your respective fame levels, you didn’t want anyone knowing of the marriage. Fans still thought you were dating, so when you got a positive pregnancy test, you were extra careful.
Max was grateful that you had a private recording studio in the house, for when you needed to drop the album. You didn’t mean to choose the surprise drop date to be at the end of your pregnancy, nor Father’s Day, but life worked in funny ways.
“Happy Father’s Day, Maxie,” you softly say, handing the little bundle off to Max.
“This is the best present, he’s beautiful,” Max hold back tears as he holds his son close to his chest.
“I’m not sure if I will be able to top this next year,” you laugh a little, your tiredness making an apparent after a long labor.
“You should take a nap, I’ll be okay with him,” Max runs a hand though your sweaty hair. To him, you’ve never looked more perfect.
“I have one thing to do first,” you yawn, pulling out your phone. Max slides into the hospital bed beside you, you immediately nestle into him, his warmth enveloping you.
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y/username SURPRISE! midnight rain is out now! I hope you enjoy this as much as I did writing it for the past four years. There is so much in my life that happened, so enjoy my journey through heartbreak, love, and growth. I want to quickly thank Max and my team for making this possible 💙
user1 AHHH this is so good, but didn’t she and Max break up? Why is she thanking him?
user3 dude, i think they are married, did you listen to everything else
user4 yeah, she had some songs about marriage, but she hasn’t been at any races since last year
user10 did y’all see the statement saying there won’t be a tour for the album?? crying in the club
user11 Okay, but Robin?? secret child??
maxverstappen1 endlessly proud of you, schatje
user5 we get it bro, she wrote Dress and The Alchemy about you
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maxverstappen1 our little robin decided to hatch 💙
danielricciardo So happy for you and Y/n, mate. Big day for the Verstappen family, can’t wait to hold the little guy!
y/username he will love his Uncle Danny
y/username he’s perfect, just like his daddy
redbullracing what a gift for father’s day! sending our gift to you 💙
user42 guys, y/n’s song credits changed…
user21 OMG MAX AND Y/N ARE MARRIED AND THEY HAVE A KID???
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ambrosiagoldfish · 5 months
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Adam x third spouse part 3 I’m begging pookie ❤️
like a time skip to when Charlie appeared and proposed the idea
Benifit of the doubt Pt.4
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Adam x 3rd Spouse! Reader
Warnings: General Adam TW’s, a little bit sad for a moment but it’s ok. Gn! Reader! honestly that’s about it I think?? Wow this is the first time it’s been this short in this series.
Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.
Request Box: Open
Word Count: 4617~
A/n: So… it’s been almost 2 months… whoops. In all seriousness though I’m sorry it’s been so long. I’ve just not been in the mood to write and a lot of stuff has been happening (which is finally over) and I’m glad I could finally post this. I was also, if I’m honest, nervous to post this, cause I’m not sure if everyone’s ready for the direction of the story. But I have made it clear that I wanted to do a time skip to the show at somepoint and decided to do it now! If you enjoy this, please let me know cause I’m really nervous about (Not my words of affirmation love language coming out-) ALSO to the requester, I know you said part 3, but I used it for part 4. I got your request as I was making part 3 soooo my bad. Hope you don’t mind tho <3 this will be the last part before the angsty finale (and maybe an epilogue)
Reblogs are always appreciated!
Anyways this was NOT beta read unfortunately, I tried to get as many errors out during the writing process so hopefully it’s fine. Also, there’s probably some words I might have wanted to italicize or make bold that aren’t, but I’m too tired to care honestly.
Tags: @tired-of-life-86 @nervoussystemss @qopia @lovelyemily @hcneyiced @v3r41ynn @ghostdoodlen @nxptvne-13 @ximenavc-che @edgyfluff @ericityyy @diffidentphantom @faimmm @slasher-whore69 @1-randomized @ozzersauce @fanlovedlt @alientee (if I forgot someone or you want to be added just tell me !!)
Days turned to weeks, to months, to years. Until eventually an eon had passed. An entirety filled to the brim with an indescribable happiness and love, threatening to spill over at any given moment. You loved Adam and Adam loved you.
To say it was all happiness would be a lie, there were some moments of sadness and pain, but all relationships were like that, even ones that lasted for eternity. You both always bounced back, apologize and moved on with a stronger bond than before. And you loved every second of it.
A lot has changed in these last few eons. Adam formed a band and is now the most popular guitarist in all of heaven. You both made new friends, some got into heaven while others were made there. Emily was one of these people to you, she looked up to you for being older than her. You’ve existed for almost all of human existence so, of course she’d look up to you.
Adam had also made new friends, his band members, some officials in heaven, but someone he’s grown close to recently was Lute. You're really happy about his friendship with Lute. She seems like a strong and loyal friend, someone that can keep him grounded while still encouraging him to be more himself. Overall, you really liked her.
How they became friends though is something… less tasteful for you. All the way back when Heaven and Hell had their first meeting on what to do with the surplus of sinners in hell causing an uprising. Neither side came to an agreement in the end, you do feel partially to blame for that, but you still stand by what you did.
You never returned to any of the follow up meetings
But Adam did, surprisingly to you. In the end, you were called to talk with Sera and Adam. You were told of the agreement between Heaven and Hell, about the yearly “cleanse” that Adam and his “Exorcists” would have to commit. At first you were shocked, sure, you didn’t have the best experience with sinners and especially with the rulers of hell, but was death really necessary? You didn’t know what to say, and Adam clearly saw this.
“Babe, you alright?” He puts his hand on your shoulder rubbing his thumb in circles. You place your hand on his.
“Yeah it’s just a lot to take in. Are we sure it has to be done… that way?”
Sera looked down in pain “they’re… uprising and are becoming to much of a threat to heaven.”
You sighed as Adam took you in his arms. Adam was fully aware that you don’t share the same sentiment towards sinners as he does. His hatred towards the unholy souls down in hell was brought about by events that you simply cannot understand. Which he is thankful for, he never would want you to experience what he did.
“If there isn’t anything else we can do then… I guess we have no choice. But I don’t want to… kill anyone, even if they are sinners.”
Adam holds you closer “You won’t have to,” you smile at him, the now familiar flickering of his LED mask meeting your gaze before softly frown “you ok?”
You nod, “yeah, just…I wish there was another way.”
-
That was it. Adam would take his exorcists down to hell to kill as many sinners as they could each year. Adam knew you didn’t want him to talk about it , he kept it as separate as he could from your life. You did have to attend meetings regarding it, as one of the very few people to know about it, that was your duty.
You were fine with having that part of the job. You weren't sure if you could kill someone, sinner or not. So, for the countless years to follow, you played your part with every new extermination, attending meetings to deal with the repercussions of each cleanse.
Adam would also have to attend the occasional meeting. Which is exactly what today was. Sera had called you both in to talk.
“Thank you both for coming. I have to inform you that you will be attending a meeting tomorrow.”
Adam groaned “What! Again? This is like the 4th fuckin’ one this week! Ugh fine! Where is it this time? halo city? Cherub towne” Adam’s voice mocked the locations you’ve both been sent to countless times with a high pitched voice. Even you have to admit that the meetings could drag a bit.
Sera's face turned into a slight grimace as she looks away from you both, she sighs and continues “The meeting will be in… hell.”
“What!” Both your voices raise in shock
“Sera, you know I don’t want to go down there again!”
“Why can’t you just send the other fucking dipshits who know about-“ Adam crossed his arms defiantly
“Stop,” Sera raises her hand toward you both “no one wants to go there, and I know you both especially don’t.” She pauses “But you both are the only available angels who know of the cleanse that aren't busy. Please… I understand your disdain but heaven’s business comes first.”
“Who are we even gonna be talking to -Wait a damn minute- Don’t fucking tell me we have to talk to him.”
“I'm sorry…” You all sat in silence for a moment before Sera begins to speak again, “But you both won’t have to worry about physically being there, we have prepared holograms for you, so neither of you would be in any danger.”
“I'll have an Angel escort you to the ‘meeting’ room tomorrow, please, get some rest. I’m sure you both have had a long day.”
With that, you and Adam went home, you were definitely not feeling well about the meeting, but the fact you wouldn’t actually be there calms your nerves a bit. You had to be a little honest with yourself, hell wasn’t really the issue for you, it was more so the people. Lucifer for one, that made you feel uneasy.
The next morning, you and Adam got ready, you had to motivate him a little. He was clearly not excited for this meeting like you. The entire way there he held you close, even though nothing could have hurt you it made him feel better knowing how close you were.
On the way there, you also got Adam some ribs, his favorite. You thought it would help his nerves a bit. Turns out, Lute was the one Sera assigned to escort you both there. That also made you both a little calmer knowing a mutual friend would be there.
The three of you waited in the ‘meeting’ room for a while, about an hour. At first you thought the meeting might had been canceled or moved and you just weren't told. But then, Lute walked up to you both.
“Sir! The Seraphim has told me to inform you that there’s been a change in plans!”
“What? The fucks that mean?” Adam said stuffing a rib into his LED mouth
“Lucifer won’t be attending the meeting, instead… his Daughter will be here in his stead.” Lute’s mask showed a continuous frown and stern expression as she spoke.
“Daughter?” Your voice shook a little. This was news to you, as long as you’ve existed you had never heard he had a daughter while in hell. You look over to Adam to see His LED eyes were wide in shock but his mask turned into a smile as he sighed.
“Phew boy, we sure dodged a big ass bullet, huh Sweetcheeks?” He laughed as his arm pulled you closer. The whole thing caused you to join in. Suddenly your nerves felt a lot better than before.
“When should she be arriving, Lute?”
“Within the hour.”
-
Adam scarfed down another plate of ribs as you all wait for the “princess of hell” to arrive. The entire time you just had to wonder what kind of person she’d be. The daughter of Lucifer and Lilith. The more you thought about it, the more bizarre it seemed.
But suddenly your thoughts were interrupted by the sliding doors opening to the meeting room and a girl steps in, asking if anyone is there.
“She can’t see us?”
“Yeah, Sera gave me a long ass lector on how this stuff works before we got here. Let’s see here…” Adam pushes a button causing a click to sound out as he says “Sup!”
The girl jumps back and falls to the floor, shocked by Adam’s sudden appearance in the room. She introduces herself as Charlie. Adam offers her to shake his hand, only for it to go through.
“Ha! I fuckin’ got you! Did you fucking see that? Good shit.”
You let out a slight laugh, as you sit and watch the meeting happen. Well, you say “meeting” but nothing about it seemed very professional. Adam for the last hour (you honestly wasn’t sure at this point) had been talking about the most random of things.
You or Lute occasionally shakening your head yes or no while listening to him, while Charlie seemed quite tired already. Not that you could blame her, people who weren’t used to Adam’s banter definitely weren’t cut out for it. But You love every word that comes out of his mouth.
Eventually Adam decides that it’s time to get into what you all came here for. Pulling out a bunch of papers, Charlie begins explaining her solution to hell’s overpopulation. You were only really half listening at first, at least before she mentioned that her solution could stop the extermination which peaked your interest.
She explains her “Hazbin Hotel” and its purpose to rehabilitate sinners, you wanted to hear more of it but Adam cut her off.
The meeting didn’t really go that well, At least for Charlie. But the whole thing left quite the impression on you. The idea of ending the extermination was stuck in your head for so long, and now you had someone who had an alternative.
“Adam, are you sure that it couldn’t have worked?”
Adam looks at you in surprise “What? Do you think that shitshow could have actually worked?” He laughed as he placed a hand on your back. “Don’t even pay it any mind, alright Babe?”
“I know, it’s just… you know I don't like the extermination. So another way to lessen the population of hell should at least be looked into.” Your voice was soft enough to barely hear.
Adam’s gaze softened but he didn’t say another word, only wrapping his wing around you pulling you closer. You lean towards him, snuggling into his soft robe. No matter how much you wanted to ignore it, you couldn’t. You needed to do something, anything.
So that night, after Adam fell asleep, you asked to talk with Sera. Leaving a note for Adam saying you went to buy something just in case he woke up.
“What is troubling you?” Sera’s voice was clear and concise.
You looked toward the ground, your nerves feeling tighter than ever, as you struggled with how to put your words together. “You're aware of all that happened in the meeting with Lucifer’s Daughter, right?”
Sera nods her head “of course, all meetings are documented about as they happen.” She tilts her head slightly “What about it?”
“Well!” You steel yourself before continuing “I would like permission to observe Charlie Morningstar’s ‘Hazbin Hotel’”
Sera’s eyes widen, breaking her calm demeanor before giving a firm “No”
“But-“
“It’s too dangerous for you to be there, Adam wouldn’t want that anyways”
“He would listen if it was an order from you!” Your eyes felt watery but you continued “Please Sera… I know you don’t want the extermination to continue. Just let me do this!”
Sera looked away from you, her feelings evident on her face, any mask now down. ‘Just a little more’ you thought
“Sera, I promise you, I’ll be careful! We don’t even have to fully support them yet, just let me observe them. It would be devastating if so many souls parish if we failed to seek all options!” You beg
Sera sighed, shakingly “…I’ll see what I can do.”
Your eyes gleamed up at the tall woman “Sera, thank you, thank you!” You wanted to hug her but out of courtesy, you advised against it.
Sera tells you that she can’t guarantee anything but she will try as she sends you home to rest.
-
A few days past after that and you haven’t heard anything from Sera. It was a little worrying and felt like a bad sign to you. That was, until you were informed by Sera that your request was accepted!
“But.” Sera stops you before you can celebrate “You're only there to keep track of the progress and to make sure nothing is happening under our noses” You nod your head in understanding
“Also…” she pauses “If anything involving this hotel happens, you will have to take full responsibility, understood?”
You nod again “yes I understand. Have you… told Adam yet?”
She shakes her head
“Ok… can you… not tell him it was my idea, please. I don’t think he’d agree if he knew.”
Sera sighs before nodding her head “Very well, I’ll tell him after you leave”
“Thank you.”
-
You return home, when you got back Adam was already gone, Sera must have already called him to the office. You dreaded when he got back. You didn’t want to see him upset, it hurt you to know how worried he was for you.
A few hours later, Adam comes through the door in a panic. He stomps up to you and pulls you into a warm and intense embrace.
“Don’t go down there. I need you here with me” his voice hitches as his wings wrap around you both, curling you both into a warm and feathery ball.
“Adam…” you paused, was this really the best thing to do? No, It had to be. If this goes well, not only will the extermination stop but Adam wouldn’t have to go down to hell ever again.
“Adam, you know I can’t go against Sera’s orders.” You kiss his cheek “and I won’t be gone forever, I’m only supposed to be there till the next cleanse. Not to mention, I’ll always come back to see you.”
Adam grumbled a little “I know, I just… don’t like you being in the same place that bastard is, and in his brat’s stupid hotel! ”
You laugh softly “Adam…” grabbing his hand, you put yours in it, showing off the gold ring on your finger “I’ll never forget my promise. You know that, right?”
Adam looks at the ring, the gold wrapped around your finger with a perfectly snug fit. Everytime he looked at it was just a reminder of your love for him. That promise was something he could never forget. He slowly raises your hand to his LED mask, kissing the back of it. “Of course not.”
“Good. I promise I’ll be fine, ok?”
He nods. Hand in hand, you slowly lead you both to the bed. The both of you lay next to each other, your bodies linked together like knots. You slwoly remove his helmet from his head, laying it on the nightstand.
Your hands move up his body before landing on his face, cupping his cheeks before pulling him to a kiss before snuggling into his chest.
-
Finally it was Time for you to leave. Sera allowed you to create portals back to heaven in case anything happened and you were in need of assistance. Adam walked you to the front gate.
“Ok, do you have everything? You didn’t forget that fucking angelic dagger I had Lute get for you right-“
You shush him “Adam, I told you I’ll be fine!”
He’s sighs “Damn it- I know that but just make sure to text me while your there ok-
You kiss him deeply “Adam. I know, you’ve told me a hundred times.” You smile as you cup his face “I love you”
He sighs “Love you too Sweetcheeks”
With one final kiss, you give Adam a tight hug before waving goodbye as you went through the flaming portal. As you went through, you take a second to look at your surroundings. In front of you was a tall building. You take a few steps back to see LED lights of a sign flashing the words ‘Hazbin Hotel’
You let out a sigh of relief. You had been a tad bit worried you’d spawn somewhere random and you’d have to find the building yourself. But it seems heaven at least spared you of that.
The red skies of hell were quite different from the pristine blue ones of heaven. Even though you just got here, you could already hear the sounds of screams and explosions in the distance. How welcoming.
You steel yourself and with three hard knocks to the door, you wait for someone to open it. Muffled Scurrying sounds of footsteps approach the door before it creaks open revealing the young blond woman in the doorframe, Charlie Morningstar.
“Hi! I’m-“
The door is slammed shut, Before opening again
“Be not afraid-“
It shuts again…
Well, this may be a bit harder than you initially anticipated. You go to knock again only for it to open once more. This time, the door doesn’t close again, instead the girl mutters a quick “Hi” before going quiet.
“Hello! I didn’t mean to scare you!” You give a small laugh before continuing “I believe we met a couple days ago?” You bring your hand towards her for a shake, to which she reciprocates.
“During the meeting with.. Adam? Right?” She grimaced when she mentioned Adam, which you decided to ignore, you simply smiled and nodded. ”but I don’t believe I caught your name?”
You tell her about yourself, about how your there to stay and monitor any progress the hotel may have. You made sure to pronounce ‘may.’ While you were hoping for this idea to show some kind of positive results, even you weren’t sure if it’d would work.
“Charlie? who’s at the door- WhatHolyShit-“ a woman with a red X over her eye suddenly shouts in surprise. You look over at her, She looked very familiar…
“Wait, you are-“
“Vaggie! Charlie’s sinner girlfriend! And you are?!” The woman known as Vaggie, highlighted the word sinner while performing a “be quiet” gesture with her hand. Your eyes widen a little at the ex-Angel in front of you but you simply smile a nod “I’m Y/n, I don’t believe we’ve met, yes?”
Look, lying is the last thing you’d want to do as a citizen of heaven but you figured that it would be fine if it was to protect someone. Vaggie nodded, her face scrunched up in a tense look.
“You feeling ok Vaggie? You’re looking a little… red?”
“I’m fine! *ahem*, Hun, how about you give them a tour of the hotel.”
Charlie gasped “Yes that's perfect, you may as well get acquainted with everyone if you’re going to be here more often!”
Charlie ran off, telling you “this way! This way!” Over and over. Before you went to follow her, you leaned toward Vaggie and said a quick “Relax, I won’t tell anyone.”
She lets out a sigh before muttering “Thank you”
You both follow Charlie as she shows you the various rooms in the hotel before leading you back to the hotel’s lobby and lounge area.
“Hey! Hello everyone!” Charlie’s voice picked up a little “I’d like to introduce you to our uh… new staff member?” You nod in agreement with the title. The room in front of you was shrouded in looks of both horror and amazement.
“What the hell’s an angel doin’ here?” A lanky spider demon spoke up first
“It’sss an ambush! seek Cover!!” The Snake demon shouted, seemingly grabbing an army helmet from thin air before taking a deep dive behind the couch.
“No Pentious-” She sighs “they’re here to monitor the hotel! Heaven sent them to scout any potential progress the hotel will have”
“It’s nice to meet you all” you look at the people in front of you, to say it was a colorful cast would be an understatement.
“These two are our current tenants of the hotel! Angel dust and Sir Pentious!”
The snake slithered slowly from behind the couch up to you, while the Spider demon remained rested on the couch
“Oh… *ahem* Excuse me dear! I am Sir. Pentious! Formally known as ‘the Architect of destruction’!” He laughs, a slight hiss sounding in his voice.
He offers a handshake which you accept. To which you immediately regret. ‘ Slimey’ you thought, before wiping your, now wet hand on your clothes.
The spider demon, who you now know as Angel Dust, just gives a wave with one of his 4 arms.
“And-“ Charlie extends the word as she quickly walk to a bar by the entrance “this is the recreational area, run by our Bartender, Husk!”
The winged bartender seemed entirely uninterested in your presence or even Charlie’s. The most you got was a small glance before he takes a swig of his alcohol and walks off.
“He’s not the most… social guy in hell” she awkwardly laughs before moving on to the next person. “And this is Nifty, our one and only maid at the hotel! Nifty say hi.”
The short woman scurried moved around you, her eye quickly looking at every every nook and cranny of you as she moved. She made numerous attempts to touch and grab various things on you, your clothes, wings, and eventually she tried to climb up you to get to your halo. That’s when you finally grabbed her in place “you're a… fast one, huh? Nice to meet you!”
“And last but not least! This is Alastor, the hotel’s executive producer and our first -and only- overlord sponsor!”
Immediately, you could tell there was something off about Alastor. The entire aura he gave off was as if he was restraining something completely and utterly ungodly. The static that surrounded him was just one of many whispers you could hear from his soul.
“Hello! It’s quite a pleasure to meet someone of your… holy status!” He offers a hand to which you, hesitantly, shake. “And what do we owe the pleasure for your service?”
“They’re going to be here to keep track of the progress of the hotel…” Charlie paused “you know I’m starting to sound like a broken record- here, it’s late, how about we all get some sleep and we can talk about it in the morning!”
“Fine by me, I am waaay too sober to be having social interaction this late” Angel picks himself up and stretches “I’m gonna hit the hay”
“Here I’ll show you to your room!” Charlie smiles “We -obviously- didn’t have time to make your own so I hope you don’t mind using one of the guest rooms” she laughs
She and Vaggie walks you to your new room before leaving you be, The room was nothing more than just your average hotel room. Of course it did have its differences, a multitude of… eyes seem to be on the wall, staring at you. Well, that’s not the least alarming.
You place your stuff down and begin unpacking, you mostly just brought the basics. Clothes, hygiene stuff, your phone, and, most importantly, a framed photo of Adam.
You sat the photo on your nightstand, angling it just right so that it would always be visible to you. As you do so, you think about the memory the photo brings, you took it on one of the first dates you went on with Adam. It was a relatively tame date, you and Adam, having a picnic by a lake at night. You brought candles so you both weren’t completely in the dark, and you just loved the way he looked, his golden eyes watching the water. The dim candle light illuminating his face with a warm golden shade. Adam hates photos of him with his mask off but… You just had to keep that moment in time forever.
*Ding* *Ding* *Ding*
Speak of the- well, you know the rest. The bright light from the phone comes with the notification sound displaying Adam in bold letters. You smile as you read his messages.
Dixkmaster69
Heyy Sweetcheeks, it’s been a bit since you left
You there??
Fucking answer
You let out a small laugh at Adam’s barrage of messages. He’s not used to you being away from him for more than a day, huh? Not that you could blame him, this is honestly nothing compared to how you feel each year he has to do the extermination.
Sweetcheeks
Hey love
Everything’s fine, I’m ok.
Aside from not having you with me :’(
Dixkmaster69
Fucking finally
You know you don’t have to do this
If I bitch enough to Sera I can get you back by tomorrow
Sweetcheeks
Please don’t, Sera already has enough on her plate.
I promise I’m going to be fine
I’ll be back before you know it.
Dixkmaster69
I know
This shit just worries me
Gonna miss hearing your sexy ass voice at night too ;)
You blush at the message before sighing. Whenever you or Adam approached a topic that made him uncomfortable, he would always try to change the subject to something that made him feel better. You knew why, Adam’s someone who rarely talked about his feelings, even after all these eons together that was something he hadn’t changed. You knew exactly what he needed, even if he didn’t explicitly tell you.
Sweetcheeks
I already miss yours too <3
Do you want to help me fall asleep with that heavenly voice of yours on the phone?
Dixkmaster69
Whatever you want Sweetcheeks <3
You smile when, almost immediately, Adam begins calling your phone. You click the lights off before You make your way in your new bed, not even bothering to change out of the clothes you’ve been wearing. You grab the cover and pull it over you and tapping the answer button.
“Sup”
You yawn “Hey handsome, I missed your voice”
You hear his voice hitch before he caused on “Of course you did, no one has a better voice than the dick master. But uh, yours is a close second”
You’re let out a tired giggle, “such a charmer, you. How’s your day been huh?”
“Oh! don’t even get me started on that- Lute took me to get some ribs to ‘calm my nerves’ or some shit and they had me, ME, wait in line for like 15 minutes! The fucking audacity!”
You smile to yourself as Adam tells you about his day, the sound of his voice was like a sweet lullaby to your ears and you couldn’t get enough of it. But eventually…
“And then when I got home, I couldn’t find my damn charger and it took me like 40 fuckin’ minutes to realize it was under our bed, do you have any idea of how it keeps getting there?” He waits for you to respond only to be met with silence. “Uh bitch, I’m talking to you.”
More silence… well no, actually if Adam focused on listening, he could hear the faint sound of your snoring from the phone. Adam sighs,”Long day, huh?”
Adam lays back in your shared bed, getting comfortable. He sets the phone beside him, plugging it in while keeping it on speaker. He yawns, “Goodnight Sweetheart, can’t wait to see you again”
Slowly, the soft sounds of both yours and Adam’s snores filled each others rooms, a distant, but intimate connection. Even in slumber, you couldn’t stop thinking of your handsome and caring soulmate.
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cashmoneyyysstuff · 8 months
Note
So, that deja vu fic got me thinking.. and what if katsuki has a childhood friend (obvi friends w deku too) where he is always trying to impress her and class 1-a notices or ( if you’d like them older ) the agency notices and starts betting on when he’ll confess to her. turns out, she actually confesses first and everyone is happy (and slightly disappointed… nobody got their money) 😋😋
Also, when i saw the notification “@cashmoneyyysstuff started following you” i have never hit a follow back button so fast 😭🫶
Remember you’re amazing, take care of yourself, drink water, stay safe, and know that you are loved ❤️
WAAAA @itzjustj-1000 this is soo cute ! especially since katsuki being a loser n tryin to impress us instead of just confessing is honestly adorable. ALSO ALSO ur LITERALLY THE SWEETEST !! ur the loveliest it's a given i had to follow u !! i tried to honour ur request as best i could, i hope you like it ! also say it w me yall: WEEWOOO WEEWOOO CHILDHOODFRIENDS TO LOVERS ALEEEEEERRTTT (yall r forcing my hand atp (not that im complaining tho))
fem reader, katsuki is a whipped little loser, katsuki likes getting praised by reader but acts like he doesn't challenge (fails miserably), kaminari n sero are little shits, m*neta (he doesn't say anything creepy don't worry <3) everyone is in their 2nd year in this one. lemme know if i missed something else !
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for as long as izuku midoriya could remember, you and kacchan have always been a packaged deal.
deku remembers all the way back in primary school, how kacchan would bend over backwards to impress you, spending his days trying to win your praise like he was collecting it. whether it be showing off how good his reading skills were, or showing off his newly acquired quirk to you at any given chance. (away from the eyes of the teachers, of course)
or even with silly things. like the time he showed you how long he could hold his breath underwater. it didn't matter, as long as he could show it off to you, he would.
deku remembers how pride would fill his childhood friends face, cheeks practically glowing and a smile basically reaching his ears. a simple "woooah, you're so cool kacchan !" had the boastful blonde giddy for the entire day, chest puffed out as he walked ahead of everyone, with you right next to him, of course. (you were the only one worthy enough to stand by his side after all)
and though he spent his time trying to win your praise, he also needed your attention constantly. katsuki constantly demanded your attention. he's the only one who's allowed to sit next to you in class, you're always the one he picks first when it's time to pick teams to play dodgeball. he's your partner for every project and you're the one who walks beside him when you and your friends go venture out in the woods to go out on your adventures. and even though they would usually take place in the park, katsuki always claimed he'd be the one to protect you if anything were to happen.
as kids, deku was probably the only one who noticed how hard katsuki tried to impress you.
and he's probably the only one to notice how he still does it now.
"sooo...kacchan totally has a thing for yn, agreed ?"
"mhm. definitely."
"yup."
"'m suprised you just noticed that now, kaminari...actually i'm not really suprised." jirou drawled, twirling one of her earphone jacks around her finger.
okay, so apparently he isn't the only one who noticed.
kaminari pouts "i noticed ! i noticed, like, ages ago !" he huffs into his folded elbows on the desk " i just wanted to see if you guys did !"
"you'd be stupid to miss it." sero cuts in smoothly. their grouchy homeroom teacher somehow ended up absent, leading to an impromptu free period. which in turn caused for loads of gossip he had somehow gotten roped into. kirishima, kaminari and sero were talking about you and katsuki, happily chatting off about something they couldn't hear from where they were sitting.
"maaaannn, bakugou's way too lucky, scoring such a pretty girl. what's he got that i don't ?!" kaminari whines. kirishima shushes him lightly, afraid to rouse the attention of a certain blonde they just so happened to be talking about
"now that i think about it.." sero wondered, leaning onto kirishima's shoulder "midoriya, you guys are childhood friends, right ? have they always been..." he cuts himself off, pointing over at you both with his chin for midoriya to look back. ".. like that ?"
you're chatting about something that's apparently funny or exciting, with katsuki listening along attentively, his head resting in his palm like he's admiring you. his full focus entirely on you, as it usually was.
you're using your hands a lot while you're talking and deku recognizes it as the thing you do when you've gotten to the juicy part of the conversation, deku almost wishes he could listen in, then remembers it's not good to be nosy and shakes the thought away. every once in a while katsuki interjects with a subtle smirk on his face and his remarks have you either giggling or playfully pouting at him unable to hide your smile. the playfulness in his heavy lidded red eyes remains at any reaction you give him, though. kacchan's worked on his poker face over the years but it seems he can't control himself when it comes to you.
izuku realizes he's been openly staring for too long and quickly turns back to look at sero who raises an eyebrow, awaiting a response.
izuku chuckles to himself "yeah, pretty much." he hums, playing around with the ends of his tie as he speaks.
"oooouu~" kaminari sings, suddenly lifting his head up from where it was hidden into his shoulder with a sudden burst of energy, startling kirishima. "juicy details about kacchan, i'm in !"
"i don't know if it's exactly 'juicy'" izuku sweatdropped, chuckling awkwardly. "but kacchan and yn have always been really close. when we were younger, kacchan would always be seeking out yn's attention. he'd be really possesive..or protective over her, i guess ?—it was all pretty harmless though." he recounted, smiling softly at his childhood memories nostalgically pouring into his mind.
both kirishima and sero let out quiet hums when he finishes while denki simply pouts "s'not as juicy as i thought it would be" he huffs petulantly, receiving a knock on his head from jirou who hisses a "he told you that, idiot"
kirishima places his head into the palm of his hands and sighs dreamingly "man, that's so cute. bakugou's been a major softie for yn for so long.." he clenches his fist and izuku thinks he sees a little tear in his eye "so manly !" he exclaims through his sharp teeth.
"yeah, i don't know if 'manly' is the word i'd use to describe someone who's been whipped for so long and still doesn't have the balls to confess" sero ribbed, snickering to himself with denki joining in shortly after.
"hey, don't be assholes !" jirou shot "i think it's kinda cute y'know ? not really..manly..but—cute." she said.
"how much you wanna bet he's not gonna confess until graduation?" kaminari challenged.
"wouldn't put it past 'im." a voice suddenly chimes in. the five of them all turn their heads left, right then down at the voice that came from none other than mineta, who had somehow wormed his way into the conversation.
"and what the hell do you think you're doing sneaking into our conversation, freak" jirou sneers, glaring down at mineta who had already dragged his chair over, including himself into the group.
mineta decides to ignore jirou as he places his arms onto the desk seriously like he's imitating some type of mafia don. " bakugou's never gonna confess any time soon, he's too much of a pussy" he waves off nonchalantly "i bet he won't even have done it by the time we've finished school ! "
" and i bet you wouldn't say that to his face !" kaminari guffaws and the purple haired boy sputters. izuku can't hold back his grin as he watches them bicker.
" kacchan's always been pretty..sure of himself" he settles "i don't think it'd take him that long to confess" he guessed, pressing his thumb onto his chin "though maybe the fact that he's so sure of himself could hold him back.."
ah, there he goes again.. the rest of them thought as they watch midoriya babble on and on into theory land.
denki suddenly slams his fists on the desks, startling everyone. he sucks in a breath "alright ! i bet a thousand yen and the entirety of my lunch box that bakugou won't confess by the end of this year !" he exclaims, not too loud but loud enough so everyone in the group could hear him.
"oooouu~ what're we betting on ?" mina chimes in, suddenly appearing behing jirou and in turn startling her. she flashes her a little glare causing the pink haired girl to offer a weak apology and a hug.
"kaminari just bet a thousand yen and his lunch that bakugou won't confess to yn by the end of this year" sero smirked, clearly enjoying the drama
" ou, that sounds fun ! lemme join in too !" the pink skinned girl pleaded giving her best puppy eye and pout combo.
"sure ! just don't come cryin' to me when you lose" kaminari agrees, playfully jabbing at his friend.
"this is so stupid. i'm not betting money on this.."jirou scoffs rubbing at her temple. "c'moooonnn, don't be chicken, jirou ! " denki whines
"mhmm, c'moonn jirou give into peer pressure !" mina joins in, wrapping her arms around the purple haired girl and swaying her side to side.
jirou groans before finally conceding "..five hundred yen. that's all you're getting from me." she concludes sourly crossing her arms.
" i'm gonna go with kaminari's and say his balls won't drop 'till graduation" sero says simply, smirking almost mischieviously at the display of sudden chaos. he looks a little too pleased, izuku sweatdrops.
"i'm not betting on my bro, that's so unmanly." kirishima refused " i say just let them go at their own pace" he finishes, receiving a nasty look from his chaotic classmates.
needless to say kirishima gave in to peer pressure soon after, offering a modest 1,100 yen by this summer for his friend to confess.
"well i stand on what i said, i don't think he has the balls to say it at all. and i put that on all the money in my pockets ! " mineta proudly spoke.
"how much is that, like, one fruit roll-up ?" mina deadpanned, not missing a beat causing the group to erupt in laughter. mineta's objection's falling on deaf ears.
meanwhile, katsuki notices you've stopped talking all of a sudden. it takes him by surprise as you were so into it a minute ago. "what's up ?" he asks. his question snaps you out of your trance and you jump slightly, turning back to look at him "oh , nothing ! they just seem to be having fun " you gasp, a smile crawling up on your face as you look back at your friends having a good time.
katsuki on the other hand has a slight pout forming on his face, displeased at how his loud mouthed friends distracted you from your conversation. and from him he thinks, but that makes him feel like a snot nosed little kid again and his expression turns even more sour.
"tch. the fuck are those losers so loud for" he grumbles under his breath. you catch it though, and you giggle. his eyes brighten and his brows unfurrow the slightest bit when he hears it.
"don't be such a buzzkill katsu, s'not their fault you're no fun." you jest, chuckling to yourself when he scowls at you.
"fuck off ! m'not a buzzkill" he rolls his eyes, huffing indignantly "an' i'm plenty of fun" he finishes grumpily. you laugh a little more, covering your mouth with your hand when you catch a peak of him narrowing his eyes at you making fun of him. he simply rolls his eyes and sighs, shaking his head. he'll let it slide, he always does with you.
"right, right. my apologies, sir dynamight" you chuckle, bowing slightly at him, he huffs out a laugh "that's sir lord explosion murder god dynamight to you" he snorts. you throw your head back and laugh and katsuki feels the same pride he used to feel when he'd found something cool to show you back when you were brats. his stomach feels fuzzy and his head feels clouded the way it used to when you'd offer him your big, bright sparkly eyes and a "you're so cool kacchan !"
god, it never failed to remind him how much of a whipped loser he was for you.
and unfortunately still is.
you scoot your chair a little closer to his and katsuki has to use all of his might not to blush at the sudden proximity, as miniscule as the distance between you both was to begin with.
"well okay then, sir lord explosion murder god dynamight" you say rapidly, laughing to yourself. katsuki let's out a breathy chuckle, it's cute. he's cute. " i'm sure it doesn't mean much, but i at least think you’re plenty fun to be around"
katsuki feels his heart skip a beat too many.
you whisper, like it's a secret. you're in your own little corner while all your classmates are chatting away yet you say this to him like it's something between you and him. batting your eyelashes up at him. god, it's like you're out to kill him and honestly katsuki thinks for a second he wouldn't mind dying by your hand.
he's such a whipped loser.
he can't think straight. you're sitting so close to him, you're lips are glossy from that lip gloss you always have on you. you smell nice, katsuki feels like a creep for smelling you like you aren't a breath away from him.
"yeah, well.." he utters lowly. he licks his lips, feeling himself grow dizzy as he watches you watch the movement intensely and swallows. his adam's apple bobs and he can feel himself blushing like an idiot. " i don't think you're all that bad either" the end of his sentence comes out a little breathy, he barely realizes he's speaking. like his body is deciding for him, he doesn't mind much.
you give him a sweet little smile and your eyes shine like stars and you look up at him like he's everything, like he's the coolest. he wants you to look at him like this all the time.
you suddenly lean in and kiss him, right next to his lips, just at the corner. it lasts for about 0.3 seconds but katsuki feel his entire body exploding from the inside like he's let off his quirk onto himself.
"i take it back actually" you start "you're super cool to be around, kacchan." you whisper bashfully. katsuki huffs out a little laugh once his heart had stabilized itself a little bit, a small smile growing on his face—
" AW MAN? WHAT THE HELL ?!"
you both turn to the sound of your electric classmate, sporting a little pout on his face. proceeding to get dog-piled on by your other classmates surrounding him, causing him to let out whines and moans of complaint.
"i-ignore him !" mina waves off nervously "just keep doin' what you were doin !— i mean, we weren't watching or anything !" she splutters.
"nice one." jirou deadpanned sarcastically, rolling her eyes. "look, we don't mean to pry or anything, but who kissed who first ?"
at that, katsuki's cheeks flare up, turning a damn near violent shade of pink. he's about to yell obscenties at his classmates, about to tell them it's none of their business when-
" i did !" you giggle, a cat-like grin on your face
"you sneaky fuckin minx-" katsuki growls, shoving his index fingers into your sides and you let out a squeal mixed with a giggle. you're quickly drowned out by your classmates releasing a group groan, with sero and kaminari yelling and booing at katsuki, who in turn starts threathing them, his hands crackling and popping.
you don't exactly know what's happening, but you can't help but feel extremely joyful and happy.
"soo.." mineta starts "since i said bakugou wouldn't confess first doesn't that technically mean i-"
" IN YOUR DREAMS ! "
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acourtofwhatthefuck · 10 months
Text
Practice On Me — Part Fourteen — Azriel x Reader
Summary: Reader is readying herself for the ball. Hot Daddy Fin™️ opens up to her a little and shares some worrying truths (and then some). Azriel and Reader reunite, body and soul.
Word Count: 8.2k
Warnings: Adult content, 18+, NSFW, minors dni.
Tried my best with this part but sorry if it's a bit iffy! This girlie is ill as FUCK. Still hope you enjoy, tho, loves!
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“You know, I have to admit, I was dubious at first.”
Mor is knelt at your feet, and you think this might be the closest you ever come to having a goddess on her knees before you. A strange part of you wants her to snap out and sink her teeth into your thigh, leave a bright red mark on the skin — but alas, her attention is fully on the hem of your gown.
“My uncle, love him though I do, is a calculated bastard.” She pushes to her feet, straightening out the fabric. “But I think he actually enjoys your company.”
“He does.” Roza pitches in from her place on the couch. “I know Fin. Y/N has him eating out of the palm of her hand.”
Though she smiles, her tone is laced with clear concern. Not because she cares about Fin, but because she cares about you. Doesn’t want you to forget that this is the High Lord of the Night Court you’re meddling with.
“Males are vapid and predictable, every last one of them.” You shrug your tense shoulders. “Throw them a few pretty smiles and they’ll do anything for you.”
Mor steps back, a low whistle leaving her. “Forget the males. I’ll do anything for you.”
Her eyes rake over your gown. So do Roza’s. And you…you want to crawl out of your skin and hide.
You’ve never owned a beautiful gown like this, never been able to afford one. The couple of dresses you do keep amongst your clothes are plain ones that just about do for special occasions. What hangs off your body now is…a work of art.
Almost feels like sacrilege for the beautiful fabric to touch your marred skin.
It’s sheer, showing off more than you’ve ever before dared to, and yet there’s a modesty, an elegance, to the many whorls and swirls made up entirely of little blue jewels and pearls and beads. It gives the gown a weight that makes it cling to you, and it outlines a body that…that quite frankly, you’d never considered beautiful until this very moment.
A body that commands the garment, and not the other way round. That makes you feel like far more than just another mistreated, unfavoured Illyrian female that will one day be lost to history.
This gown makes you think: I do not need the wings I have spent my life longing for.
It makes you think: There is nothing more beautiful than a good spirit and soul, and I have both.
It makes you think: Never again will anyone — friend or family or foe — make you feel less than worthy. Less than deserving. Less than strong.
You have always had strength. And this dress somehow amplifies it. Will amplify it to a room full of people who will see, through that sheer fabric, your scars, your lack of wings, and they may pity you, or not pity you at all, or may even laugh.
But you will still be beautiful.
Movement has you realising that tears have blurred your eyes. You swipe them away, and Mor is smiling at you, and Roza looks like she’s a little choked up, too.
“You are so godsdamned gorgeous.” Mor says earnestly. “Every last inch of you.”
Indeed, you glance over your shoulder at the mirror behind you, your gaze immediately finding your scars sitting brutal and undeniable beneath the sheer fabric. You don’t hurriedly force your gaze away like you have done your whole life, don’t try to avoid them.
You just…look. Look at what has been a part of you for so long, now.
“…Mor?” Roza says quietly. “Can you…give Y/N and I a moment?”
“Of course.” Mor agrees. “Time for me to find a snack.”
The stunning blonde squeezes your hand as she strolls past, and as she leaves the room, the door is pulled shut behind her.
Roza rises from her seat, making her way over to you. And as she stops before you, her hands move up to cup your face.
“Did you know,” she murmurs, “that I’ve always thought you were one of the prettiest females in all of Windhaven?” A soft scoff leaves you, but before you can glance down, she’s holding your face firmly. “I mean that — even when Azriel brought you to the cottage that very first time, and you were covered in dirt and mud, your hair all knotted, a leaf or two in there — you thanked me for feeding you, and you gave me a smile that was just like…sunshine. Such a rare thing in Windhaven. I remember thinking, this girl deserves to smile like that, always.”
A single tear spills down your cheek, and Roza wipes it away. She definitely looks like she might start bawling, too — a rare thing for her.
“I know you were never given much of a chance to feel worthy.” She whispers. “Your mother abandoning you…your father taking your wings…they were the two people who were supposed to love you more than anyone, and they broke you and left you broken.”
“You put me back together.” A lump in your throat fractures your words. “You and Rhys and Azriel and Cassian. Your love—”
“My little dove, you put yourself back together. We just loved you through it. I just want you to know that…I just want you to remember, the next time you feel worthless, that you are beautiful, and you have always been beautiful. You’re strong, and spirited, and determined. You have a resolve like no other I have ever seen, and you can do anything — which is why I know you will achieve whatever it is you’re planning with Fin.”
Only then does your gaze drop. “I only wish to appeal myself to him enough that he’ll value my opinion — that this Fenlaros business cannot go ahead. But I still feel awful…he’s your mate.”
“Gods, in the loosest definition, Y/N.” Her hands move to yours, then, liking them together. “Believe me when I say that if it weren’t for my children, I’d never see that male again. I think you know that I do not hold him in high regard.”
“I do know. But I respect you and care about you more than anyone in the world. And if you feel even a shred of discomfort about what I’m doing, I’ll stop. I’ll find another way—”
“The only discomfort I feel,” she squeezes your hands gently, “is at the thought of any harm coming to you. But I’ll feel that way through everything you do in life, because I love you. I also feel awe, because you’re brave and brilliant, and you’re doing what’s right. What I will teach this little girl,” she places your hands on her swollen belly, “to do — to stand up against what is wrong, and do so without a lick of shame.”
“I’ll protect her with my life, you know — the babe. I’ll love her unconditionally.”
“And she will love you, my dove, just as I do. So,” she steps back, eyes your dress again. A smile curves her lips. “Do whatever it is you have to do, Y/N, to change Fin’s mind — you have my full support. I only ask three things of you.”
Your expression softens. Anything — you’d do anything for her. “Of course, Roz.”
“First, don’t get caught with your scheming.” She says. “And second — you may feel like murdering Fin. Gods, believe me, I get it. But please do refrain. He’s my children’s father, after all, and Rhys isn’t ready to be High Lord just yet.”
You breathe a laugh, dipping your chin. “No murder. Got it. And the third thing?”
Roza steps up to you, her fingers finding the beautiful, jewelled material that clings to you like a second skin. She smiles.
“Go to that ball,” her fierce eyes meet yours, “and show everybody there that your father didn’t take one bit of beauty away from you.”
✧: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚
You pace the length of your room. Back and forth, back and forth. You’re restless tonight.
Day after day is swept behind you like the snow that blankets the mountains. Time is a racing thing. Starfall is fast approaching, and thus, so is the ball. But you still feel as though you can’t get a good read on Fin’s thoughts.
No matter how many dinners you share with him, how many walks through the city streets you take together, the shows you watch in the Rainbow…he does not offer you the candidness with which he spoke through that very first conversation in his study. Any attempts to talk about Tathaln, about Fenlaros, are promptly diverted. He wants to talk about you — wants to know you.
It feels like the opportunity to stop this shit show in its tracks is slipping through your fingers, and you can’t grab hold of it, pull it back.
So instead of sleeping, you think, and you pace, and you—
Gods, you just want to see Azriel.
How much space, you wonder, is enough space? You have respected his needs, have kept to Velaris, given him time to confront his innermost thoughts and feelings. But you don’t know how long he needs, and right now…right now, all you want is to see him. Look into his eyes. Hear that soft, quiet voice telling you that everything will be okay.
You need to know if he’s made a decision about Fenlaros. You’ve tried not to think about it, not to dwell on the possibility that he could choose to run from his feelings over embracing them. But the longer the silence stretches on…the more you find that hole in your heart gaping, threatening to swallow you whole.
You pace more and more, up and down in time to the ticking of the clock. It’s a wonder you haven’t worn a track through the carpet. You don’t know why you’re suddenly so antsy, but perhaps if you could just talk to Az, some of your worries could be allayed—
Before your thoughts can catch up with your body, you’re tearing through the drawers in the desk, scrambling for paper, a pen. Practically throw yourself into the chair. A letter — a letter will do the trick—
But you don’t know what to write.
You stare at the blank parchment like the words will simply appear by your willing. They don’t.
A love letter? No, no, not a love letter. Just a letter to…to remind him that you are still here. That you are reason to stay in Windhaven, and you think you could be reason enough.
Azriel… you picture him as you crawl his name. His honey-golden eyes and his silken hair. The sharp bone structure that could slice through paper, the full lips. The memory of how those lips feel is fading, and you want — need — it back. Your pen pauses, hovers at the parchment, and those lips are all you can think of, the urgency with which you crave them.
Azriel, you write again, I want to see you. I need you, too—
A soft knock lands on the door, and the pen clatters against the desk where you drop it.
The clock has just timed three in the morning — the knock is an unexpected obtrusion in the dead of night. One that makes you anxious.
But a second knock comes, and you shove the parchment and pen back into the drawer, scrambling to your feet. Perhaps it’s Roza — the more the pregnancy progresses, it’s not unusual for her to wake up in the night with need for something. You hurry over and tug it open.
Fin stands on the other side, looking…unkempt. His hair is mussed, like he’s been dragging his fingers through it. The first few buttons on his shirt have been undone, and a glimpse of a fine, chiselled chest peeks out. The sleeves are rolled up to his elbows. He looks as though he hasn’t been to bed.
He drinks in the sight of you in your nightgown, bathed in the room’s glow. He swallows. “Forgive me, I…I saw your light on. Thought you might be having trouble sleeping again.”
You incline your head. “I was.” You admit. “…And you?”
“Too much in my head to even attempt it.”
You’re not sure what to reply with, how to help. Fin watches you closely like…like he needs to. Like gazing at you brings him comfort.
You are treading a very, very dangerous path. But you shift on your feet and ask him, “Would you like to come in?”
A tiny nudge of a smile pulls one side of his mouth up. “I was actually wondering if you’d allow me to take you somewhere.”
Your eyes widen a little. The surprise isn’t for show, and it seems to please him. “Right now?”
“The City of Starlight doesn’t sleep. Ever.”
A fact you’ve learned all too well during your stay here. There’s always some sort of activity, something going on that sends a constant pulsing through the city streets. For some reason, you hadn’t imagined Fin to be a participant in the night life.
“It’s somewhere I go when I can’t sleep.” He explains, as though you’ve spoken your thoughts loud and clear. “I think you’d like it. And from one insomniac to another, I…I would be honoured to share it with you.”
How can you possibly say no to that? For all Fin is mysterious, for all he keeps his cards tightly pressed against his chest, you truly believe that he finds a strange sort of solidarity in this one affliction that burdens you both. You may have wildly different reasons for pacing your room at night — and you’re not sure he’ll ever tell you his — but when the world is too quiet and thoughts are too loud…there’s comfort in knowing that somebody else is staring down those early hours, also.
It almost makes him seem…normal.
And perhaps that’s why you offer him a dazzling smile that isn’t entirely disingenuous. “From one insomniac to another,” you say, “I’d love to come with you.
The way his eyes light up makes you wonder if you’ve played your role, appealed yourself to him, a little too well. “Then I’ll wait here while you get dressed.”
You incline your head. “I’ll just be a moment.”
He waits patiently as you change from your nightgown into warm clothes that will shield you from the freezing night air. With no indication of where you might be going, a sweater and breeches and boots seems like the safest bet. You sweep your hair out of your face and shrug the weariness from your bones. When you emerge from the room, Fin’s gaze traces you like you’ve donned an evening gown and not the thickest layers you could fine.
“I find you so very intriguing.” He comments unexpectedly, and you’re not sure what he means.
You plaster a smile on your face, all the same. “Where are we going, Lord of the Night?”
Heat stokes his hickory eyes, and he looks as though he’s actually trying to tamp down on a broad smile. “It’s a surprise.”
You hold a hand out. He takes it. “Then surprise me.”
✧: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚
 “Tilt your head up.” The instruction comes from close behind you. Near enough that a warm breath tickles the back of your neck. You dutifully obey. “Now, open your eyes.”
Your eyelids flutter open slowly, cautiously. What you’re met with has your next breath catching in your throat.
A dome of starlight arcs high above you. The twinkling jewels in the sky feel almost close enough to reach out and touch, and they shine brilliantly through the glass roof, an occasional transient one cartwheeling its way past in pursuit of another place.
You can only stare. Gape. Your feet move forward a couple of steps, but your face remains tilted upwards.
You were in this building only a couple of evenings before, but it had been so packed, then, so filled with music and chatter and laughter and activity, that you hadn’t noticed what sat above your head. You’d been far too enamoured with the performers, their poetic verses and fluid dances, the tragic climax that had brought you to tears.
Now, the largest theatre in Velaris’s rainbow is empty and bathed in darkness, broken only by silvery moonlight. You and Fin are the only two here. And standing on the gargantuan stage, a mass of empty, folded seats staring back at you, you have the perfect view of the night sky that gives a performance all of its own above you.
There are soft footsteps, and Fin is also stepping forward, stopping at your side. “In over nine centuries, I’ve never tired of that sight,”
You shake your head, a little dazed. You’re lost for words. “I can see why.”
“There is so much unexpected, so much chaos and burden, in being High Lord. But no matter what I may face, what choices I make, and what reactions they receive…there will always be the night sky and its stars.”
Only then do you remove your gaze from the domed glass ceiling — to drink him in and wonder how many layers deep his true heart lies. This male who is as cunning and cruel as he is handsome and charming. How many dimensions does he have that you’ve never stopped to consider?
“I know it doesn’t exactly support the imagine of a calculated High Lord who shouldn’t be crossed.” Fin says, staring had at the surface of the stage whilst a wry smile graces his lips. “Sneaking off to an empty theatre in the dead of night when sleep evades me. But I find…peace here.”
You eye the ginormous building around you, dipped in shimmering moonlight and the shadows of twinkling stars. All those empty seats, the vacant orchestra pit, the stage that has trapped so many beautiful voices and words, guided so many dances and echoed so much beautiful music. There’s a haunting loneliness to the desolation. And you can’t help wondering if…if Fin relates to that, somehow.
When you snap out of your thoughts, you find he’s moved again. Now, he sits on the very edge of the stage, legs hanging down and palms bracing him. He stares out at the rows and rows of red velvet seats, not one of them disturbed by a spectator.
You’re moving before you tell yourself to. Sitting at his side and tucking your legs beneath you. You spend a short time in still silence, but the heaviness of the High Lord’s thoughts seems to spread to every corner of the building.
“When you brought me here the other night,” you angle yourself towards him, “it was my first time in a theatre — ever. I never saw a show before.”
A very slight frown pinches Fin’s features.  He seems to consider that. “One of my flaws, Y/N, I have to admit, is that I often forget that there’s a world outside of my privilege. That people lack where I never will.” He tugs his bottom lip between his teeth. “Roza was right to take Rhysand to Windhaven. He’s grown with a humility that I very much do not have.”
You snort softly. “I spend a lot of time with your son, My Lord. I assure you he’s just as capable of arrogance. I’ve kicked his ass a good few times because of it.”
A quiet laugh rasps from him. “Somehow, I don’t doubt that.” He pauses, and then his elbow is gently nudging you. “I told you, anyway — it’s Fin. I consider us to be friends. Don’t you?”
In some ways, you really do. Ans what a lying, using, devious little friend you are.
Especially as you scoot closer to him. And you’re softening your features and staring openly at him.
You don’t miss the way his gaze falls to your lips.
“I do.” You say, and he lifts his eyes to yours again. “And as your friend, I’d like to know what weighs so heavily on your mind tonight.”
His mile falters. And you don’t want to lose him, to let the moment slip away from you. You quickly grab his hand before he can tense up.
“I want you to talk to me…” You make your voice soft as butter, sweet as honey. “I like talking to you, Fin.”
There’s a beat. A tense one. And then his body is loosening, relaxing, his eyes becoming infinitely warmer.
His hand wraps around yours, the pad of his thumb tracing your nail. “I like talking to you, too.” He admits, and pauses again. “…War is…a great likelihood, Y/N.”
It’s your turn to go still, then, to tense up. Icy cold surprise bolts through you. That…isn’t what you were expecting.
“War?” You breathe, your mind already conjuring images of your friends on a battlefield. “With whom? When?”
“I do not know when. It could be in a year’s time; it could be in a decade. That all depends on how long it takes for humans to rise up and rally against our kind.”
“Humans?”
“There has been more and more pushback, in recent years, from humans. Humans who are enslaved by our kind and are sick of it. More and more of them are beginning to stand up against it, to protest how they’re forced to live. They’re willing to go to war over it. I don’t know when or where, but they will. In years to come, they will.”
“As they should.” You sit up straight. Perhaps it’s the wrong thing to say, but you don’t care. “They should revolt. I think it’s barbarous, the way our kind treat them. Their purpose is not to serve us. They have just as much right to live freely as we do.”
You mean it, mean it with your whole heart. You know what it’s like to be used for somebody’s personal gain, what it’s like to have freedom always lurking just out of reach. And you’ve heard about the treatment of enslaved humans. Most would rather die that live under the cruelty of their fae masters. That the practice hasn’t been outlawed utterly sickens you.
Fin says nothing for a while. His hand continues to hold yours. His eyes drink you down with a muted intensity. Like this is the first time he’s ever really taken you in.
“I agree.” He murmurs, much to your surprise. “And when war comes — and it will, and I’m preparing for it — when war comes, I will fight alongside the humans. To liberate them.”
You look at him, then — a male who has lived for almost a millennia, but doesn’t look a day over forty. Who is so universally feared, who carries a reputation for things you can’t even bear to consider. You will not fool yourself into believing that the darkness hides an inner light, or that the cruelty is a front. He is not soft and he is not kind.
But perhaps he’s not totally bad, either. That he would put himself in the firing line for the liberation of innocent humans…it has to speak somewhat to his character.
It almost makes you regret your scheming, your manipulating.
Before you can muster a response, the High Lord is leaning closer. Your body tenses as his face stops inches away from yours.
“You need not be afraid of me, Y/N.” He whispers. “I find you…magnificent. I like that you don’t filter yourself in front of me, that you’re not afraid to speak your true thoughts and feelings.  You…you are an asset. Worth so much more than you’ve ever been given credit for.”
Your gaze dips, cheeks burning at the compliment. “I don’t know about that—”
“I mean it.” His finger hooks under your chin, soothing the skin there. “Magnificent.” He repeats, and he’s leaning in closer, closer, until his lips are coasting your flushed cheek. The kiss he presses there is cold in contrast, but you have no chance to react as his mouth brushes its way to the shell of your ear and lingers there. “Absolutely brilliant. And do you know what?”
“…What?”
“After the ball is over,” his breath tickles your ear, “I’m going to bring you back here, to this stage. And those stars above our heads will watch as I strip you bare and fuck you hard enough to shake the building.”
It takes every morsel of your resolve not to start at the words. You release a shaky breath — one that makes you seem eager, responsive. It’s convincing enough that you don’t think you’d be out of place up here on this stage.
Thankfully, you don’t have to drag words from your spinning thoughts. Fin lets go, and he pulls back, rising to his feet.
“But until then,” he holds a hand out for you, “there is much to be done. Starting with you and I getting a good night’s sleep.”
You wear a mild smile as you allow him to pull you up. “A girl can dream.”
“And so can a High Lord.”
You don’t say much else to each other as he tugs you close and spirits you back to his palace. You are both pensive, and you are both tired.
But when he bids you goodnight outside your bedroom and strolls off to his own, sleep seems further away than ever. You’re thinking too much at once. Humans. War. Fin. Azriel.
You still desperately want to see Az, talk to him.
You dig back into the drawer, meaning to retrieve the letter you’d started to write.
But your hand merely knocks against wood, and the letter is gone.
✧: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚✧・゚: *✧・゚
You’re tempted — to write another letter, or note, or…whatever. You don’t even know what became of the first, unfinished one, whether it made its way to Azriel or not.
But days pass, and you…you begin to lose your nerve a little. Perhaps it’s better to live in ignorance for as long as possible than know, either way, what Azriel is thinking. Choosing. Can’t help feeling that the more time pedals on without a word…the worse the outcome will be.
Distractions help. But tonight, it would seem, there are none. And it’s strange, because everything around you is bathed in luxury, in excellence, but you find yourself missing the stripped back simplicity of Windhaven. The crumbling cottages, the mead hall, the rough-and-tumble way of life. There’s always something happening in that harrowing place, something to keep you occupied. As you stare down an evening in a huge, mostly empty palace, you’re actually struck by your longing for it. Both Roza and Fin are busy. Mor is away. Only the mountains and the distant sounds of the city are your companions tonight.
And once again, your thoughts take you to Azriel.
You think maybe this need for him is getting out of hand. And maybe it’s just the sugar-sweet things that Fin has been speaking into your ear, the knowledge that deep down, there’s only one person you want to make such promises to you—
No. It’s not just that. Not just a pathetic influence of suggestive words. It’s a need.
You need Azriel.
Your closest friend. Your safety blanket. The male who saved you and brought you into the fold of a loving, supportive unit. You stared down awkward adolescence together, faced such trying times by each other’s sides.
And you need him.
Your heart, your body, your skin, is hot and heavy with it. Restless. Like the craving is pulling you apart from the inside.
You need to do something, anything, to occupy yourself; take a late-night stroll, read a book. Anything to stop you from staring at the ceiling and being eaten alive by the fire that scorches your veins.
You’re so desperate to get moving that you don’t bother to grab a jacket — just shove your feet into your shoes. A spring mildness has blanketed the city, anyway. You’ll be fine. You just need to move—
But you yank your bedroom door open, and Azriel is on the other side.
His beauty punches you straight in the gut.
He’s a vision, stood there in casual clothing, a note — your note — clutched in his hand. He takes in the sight of you just as hurriedly.
“What are you doing here,” you breathe.
He opens his mouth. Closes it. His eyes rove you again, and he swallows. “I got your note.” He answers. “I wanted to see you, too, and…the High Lord summoned Rhys, Cass and I here…to warn us to be on our best behaviour at the ball.”
You can’t say anything. Can’t speak. You just gawk like a godsdamned fool.
A strange concoction of a frown and a laugh comes from Az. “I…snuck away after…to come here—”
Before you even know what you’re doing, your hand is bunching in the front of Azriel’s shirt, and you’re dragging him into the room with all your strength. He looks bewildered as you shove the door shut behind him.
“Az, have you lost your mind?” You round on him. “If Fin knew you’d come to my room—”
“He isn’t here.” He cuts you off. “Cass went straight back to Windhaven, and Rhys knew I wanted to see you, so…he’s currently having quality family time with Roza and his father in the city.”
There’s a lot to unpack. But all your mind wants to zero in on is that one little sentence — Rhys knew I wanted to see you.
Pathetic, how your entire stomach flips.
“…You call him Fin?”
It takes a moment for your mind to catch up enough to understand Azriel’s question.
“We’ve been living under the same roof.” You shrug slowly. “I…guess he got tired of me using his title.”
Az stares at you, assessing. You’re not sure what he’s looking for, but you fidget under the intensity of his gaze.
“What is it?” You ask him.
“I’m worried about you. I know he’s taking you to the ball. I don’t want you playing his games.”
You purse your lips. “…That why you snuck here to my room, Az? To give me a warning—”
“I came here because you said you wanted to see me, and I want to see you, too.”
So open — for him. So straightforward that for a beat, you’re not sure how to react.
But then you’re moving, and so is he, and your bodies slam together in a tight, long-awaited embrace. Feeling his arms wrap around you is…everything. Everything you’ve missed and longed for. Everything you will ever long for. Whatever happens…Azriel is the only thing you’ll need, when all is said and done.
And that’s why you’re suddenly crying, clinging to him.
On instinct, Azriel’s arms tighten around you. He moves a hand up to cradle the back of your head, and he whispers, “Y/N…”
“Please don’t leave Windhaven.” The words choke out of you. “Please, Az, just…don’t go to Fenlaros. Please—”
“Y/N. Look at me.”
Tears and all, you do. You remain as close to him as you possibly can as you lift your head to meet his eyes.
You don’t know how you know, but you do — from that one, heavy stare, you can tell that things have changed. That he has changed. He looks like the same, stunning male that you’ve always admired, but something else sits on his face.
Emotion.
Determination.
Fire.
He opens his mouth. Takes a slow, shuddering breath that you feel through every inch of your body. And then he says, with utter clarity, “I’m not going anywhere.”
You almost break all over again. But he keeps talking, keeps sharing.
“I love you. No — I’m in love with you. I love you more than I can put into words. I want you and only you, and I’m not leaving you. The only reason I would ever walk out of that camp is if you were by my side, and we were leaving together.”
You are…weightless. Boneless. Held up only by Azriel’s arms. A tear rolls down your cheek, and you allow it to fall to the carpet.
“My handling of my feelings,” Az stares down at you, “has been one huge fuck up. I loved you long before you offer to let me practice intimacy on you. Experiencing those things with you…the things you made me feel…only brought those feelings to the surface. And instead of facing them as I should have done, I hid behind Kaeda to avoid them. But it was never about Kaeda. It was always you. It will always be you. And I’m scared, Y/N, I’m fucking terrified. But I’m done running. Done hiding.”
Silence sweeps into the room on swift wings, and you are suddenly incapable of thought, and of somehow turning it into words. Without Azriel’s voice to distract you, you’re aware of the tremors that wrack through his body. As though this is the scariest thing in the world to him, and he’s trying to hold strong against it.
It probably is.
He studies you closely. Croaks out, “Please say something.”
And perhaps it’s giving him the wrong impression entirely, but you’re stepping out of his arms and putting space between you. You just…need to gather your thoughts. To remember how to speak.
“I…” You blink. “I handled it badly, too.”
“It doesn’t matter—”
“I made selfish choices. I…I acted out of jealousy because I wanted you, but you and Kaeda were…”
He shakes his head resolutely. “What I told you before was true. I never touched Kaeda like that. Even before I found out about all that Fenlaros shit, I think I knew that I wouldn’t. That I couldn’t.”
A fact that breaks your heart. Your eyes fill with tears again. “But I still did. Cass and I—”
“Cassian was there for you when I should have been, and I had no right — none — to react the way that I did. If anyone did anything wrong that night, it was me. But what you and Cass did…it does not matter. Not one bit.”
You’re pivoting on the spot, turning your back to him, before you can crumble entirely. He really means it. Really does not hate you for the choice you made, even though it hurt him.
“Y/N,” Az’s voice shakes behind you. “Please…look at me.”
Now you’re confronted with the situation, part of you wants to run — to hide.
But Az is being open. Honest. No matter how hard, how terrifying it is for him…he’s here. He’s trying.
And so you’ll try, too. And you think you might be shaking just as much as he is as you turn back to him.
The two of you stare at each other. Feel the situation out with your gazes alone.
Azriel is the one to break the extended silence.
“You said you need me.” He eyes you. He’s visibly trembling all over, and it has nothing to do with the chill in the room. Trembling like he’s trying to hold himself together against the weight of the situation.
“…Yes.” You swallow. “I do, Az…I think I’ve always needed you.”
“So show me.”
You pause. Blink, your eyes blown wide. “What?”
“Show me how you need me.” He steps closer, and though he’s shaking, he outreaches a hand and find yours. “Show me how to give you what you need.”
Your fingers brush his, and you’re forcing a lump down your throat. Drinking him in. He…he’s exquisite. “You mean…”
“I mean,” the gap is closed between your bodies, and his heat is reaching you, “I don’t want to practice. I want it all…everything…with you. I want you to take me. Only you—”
You’re surging forward with so much pent-up need that when your lips collide with Azriel’s, it almost knocks you both to the floor.
But Azriel’s arms are banding around you, and he’s a pillar against you, kissing you back with just as much heat.
You don’t know which of you makes what move. Your hands are all over him, and his are all over you, and he’s walking you backwards and groaning as the kiss deepens.
You find the hem of his tunic, dip your hands under, fingertips skating warm skin that shudders beneath your touch. “Can I take this off?” You murmur, and he swallows your words greedily.
“All of it — take it all.”
And so you do. There is no method to it. You’re a woman starved and crazed as you tear at his clothing, not caring about where it ends up, so long as it’s no longer on him. More and more tan skin is exposed, more muscles, more scars. And when he kicks out of his boots and breeches and his underwear is the only remaining barrier, you’re reaching for him, for the hardness that’s pushing through the dark grey fabric and taunting you.
But Azriel reaches out an arm to gently stop you. His hand brushes your cheek, and his eyes are pure hunger as he says, “Your turn.”
And it hits you just then that up in until this point, Azriel has never seen you naked — in this capacity, anyway. There have been plenty of non-sexual circumstances over the years in which you’ve gotten a glimpse of each other, but not like this. Even when he began practicing on you, you never took your clothes off.
And you’re fucking nervous. Even more so under the press of his gaze. He looks like he may combust as you slowly move your hands to your shirt and tug the front laces loose. You pull the hem out from where it was tucked into your breeches.
The fabric parts enough that it more or less slides off you and pools on the floor. You do not meet the heavy stare that watches you so closely. You may lose your nerve if you do.
But when the last few items of clothing are off and kicked away from you, and you’re left entirely bare, you hear a sharp intake of breath. Curiosity gets the better of you. You lift your gaze and resist the urge to fold your arms over your chest.
Azriel is staring at you like…like nobody ever has before.
Like you are the rare rays of sunlight that break through the grey landscape of Windhaven. Like the world around you was forged from your own two hands.
Like you’re beautiful, and worthy, and unruined.
“…What is it?” You clear your throat, shifting on the spot.
Azriel shakes out of a daze and takes a single step closer to you. “You are…” His throat bobs, “You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.”
You almost laugh. Almost. But something stops you.
The sincerity in his tone, his eyes. The realisation that he truly means that.
Your eyes travel from his face, down his sculpted chest and stomach. The firm, toned legs and what sits beneath him. You’ve seen plenty of his body naked. But…not all at once.
You think the air might be punched from your lungs.
He’s hard as a rock — from looking at you. The tip of his cock is already leaking moisture. His wings flare proudly at his back.
“So beautiful.” He cups your jaw, guiding your eyes back up to his.
There’s nothing else you can say, in that moment, than the words that tumble from your lips.
“I love you,” you whisper.
Emotion crosses his face, and both hands are gripping your cheeks. He kisses you deeply; so deeply that it steals your breath.
And then he pulls away, and he’s repeating his earlier words, his forehead pressed to yours. “Show me — show me what you need. No games, just…you and me.”
No games, indeed. You cannot wait any longer.
You rise on the tips of your toes and claim his mouth with yours, and you’re guiding him back, back, until his legs are hitting the bed and he’s gladly falling onto it. He sprawls out, watching as you climb over him. As your hand caresses his stomach and moves down.
And when your fingertips brush the head of his cock, a deep, delicious noises rumbles in his throat.
You mop the moisture up with your palm, using it to slick the length of him and slide your hand up and down. He hisses between his teeth, hips jerking, hands bunching within the covers on your bed.
“No games,” he repeats through gritted teeth. “This is about both of us.”
And you know that, and you’re not patient enough, anyway, for foreplay right now.
It dawns on you that there will plenty of time for that.
He is not leaving Windhaven — not leaving you.
You will have experiences together beyond this one night.
And with that very fact warming your heart and making it set to burst, you place your legs either side of his body and stare down at him. His cock brushes against your centre, and he can feel how wet you already are for him. His eyes travel down.
You watch, and you ask him, quietly, “You’re sure about this?”
His gaze flicks up immediately. “I’ve never been surer about anything in my life.” He reaches out a trembling hand and brushes a strand of hair out of your face. “That doesn’t mean I’m not nervous — gods, I really fucking am. So scared. I just…want to do it right. To be good for you.”
The sentiment almost brings tears to your eyes. “You couldn’t do it wrong if you tried, Az. Do you trust me?”
“With my whole heart.” He sits up a little — angles himself closer to you. “And I love you with my whole heart, too.”
And that’s all either of you need, isn’t it? Love and trust. The need that exits between you. Everything that is just…yours and Azriel’s relationship in its entirety.
Your eyes remain locked with his as you gently reach down and position his cock at your entrance. He breathes shakily. Doesn’t look away from you once.
Not as you slide down onto him just a little. You pause at the first feel of your walls stretching to accommodate him. A pleasured frown furrows his brow. A moment passes, two, and then you slide down further.
More and more. Sinking onto him. Pausing. Adjusting. With every inch of his huge length that disappears inside you, you feel like every one of your nerve endings is struck by lightning. Azriel’s head lolls back, and he makes a soft noise.
“You’re okay?” You check, hovering over him.
“You feel—” He chokes on his words. “Fuck.”
It’s the encouragement you need to sink the rest of the way onto him. The last few inches slide into you quick, thanks to the slickness that soaks your folds, and then he’s pushed into the hilt and hitting a spot so deep inside you that you can’t stifle the noise that breaks from your throat.
“Did I hurt you?” Azriel gasps, and you can only shake your head. He seems to study your face for confirmation, before he’s pushing up to kiss you.
And you kiss him back. For a moment, that’s all either of you do.
But when he’s losing himself in your mouth, his tongue dancing around yours, seemingly distracted by your kiss…only then do you lift your hips and sink down onto him again. And then you’re falling into a slow, steady rhythm.
Azriel is gasping again, his mouth moving from yours to press kisses to your jaw, your neck, your collarbones — your breasts. As you rock slowly against him, the walls of your pussy squeezing him, coaxing him, he buries his face into your chest and explores you, lips and tongue paying attention to your nipples, teeth grazing with a gentleness that’s almost heartbreaking.
“So beautiful.” He whispers, and the hands that are sitting on your hips travel up your back — up to the scars that live in the place of your stolen wings. “Gods, Y/N, you’re everything.”
You moan, rocking harder on him and wrapping your arms around his neck. You just…want to hold him to you, to feel him against you. It’s like it all comes crashing down on you that he very easily could have left.
But he didn’t. He won’t. He is here and so are you. He is yours and you are his.
“Talk to me,” you breathe, raking your nails down his arms. “Tell me how you feel.”
“So good — feels so good with you wrapped around me.”
“Yeah?” You lean down, brush a kiss to his lips. “You like being inside me?”
“There is — fuck — there is no one, Y/N, that I want to do this with, besides you.” His mouth slants over yours, and he whispers two words — take me — before he’s giving himself to your kiss.
He’s so big, so deep. And the blood in your veins feels like molten lava as the pace picks up, as his trembling begins to subside, and he grows more confident. His groans are loud, and his hands roam over your body before finally landing on your hips. Fingertips dig into your flesh with a dizzying bite, and he’s rocking you, encouraging you to take him. To fuck him.
This is not practice. This is two bolts of lighting striking in the same place. The friction between your bodies is perfect, like nothing else you’ve ever felt. The pleasure may just finish you yet. It’s electric. Addictive. You want to feel like this forever, with him.
And more pleasure floods you as in one swift move, he flips you over — takes you entirely by surprise. You’re landing on your back, and he’s hovering over you. He stills as he stares down at you.
“This is perfect.” He says, dipping down to kiss you again. It makes him move inside you suddenly, and the different angle has you both gasping into each other’s mouths. “Gods.”
“Fuck me, Az.” You moan. “Just like that.”
What starts out slow quickly builds in pace. The roll of Azriel’s hips become thrusts — and the moans, the cries, the words that leave you, all guide them to be deeper, harder. You think you could stay like this forever, with him buried inside of you, wringing pleasure from every corner of your body. It snakes through your veins and zips up your spine, and when his hand travels down and his fingers find your clit, you fucking explode.
You cry out, bucking up from the bed as your orgasm hits you full force. Azriel fucks you through it, and his groans are growing louder, more desperate, as the walls of your cunt clench around him. He breathes out a fractured, desperate noise, leaning down to brush his lips over yours as he fucks into you harder.
“I can’t last much longer.” He chokes around his pleasure, pressing quick, nipping kisses to your mouth. “I can’t—”
“Come for me.” You gasp, locking your legs around his waist. “Come inside me.”
The noise that your words coax from him is downright sinful. He grabs your hips in his hands, slants his mouth over yours. He slams into you again, again, again, and then he’s roaring his pleasure with enough force to shake the bed, and you feel every rope of come that he spills into you.
You’re trembling. Or maybe that’s him. Or both of you. Both slick with sweat, and both shaking, and both unable to hold yourselves up any longer.
Azriel collapses beside you, his body still tangled with yours. He buries his face into the crook of your neck, his heavy breaths heating your skin. You sink a trembling hand into the strands of his hair.
“That was—” His voice hitches, “I can’t…can’t put it into words.”
Neither can you. It’s all you can do to nod as you catch your breath.
“Thank you.” A kiss is pressed against your neck. Another. Az’s arm drapes over your chest, and he moves his mouth to yours. “Thank you.”
Still void of words, you settle on kissing him. Deep. Slow. Unhurried. Your hand cups his cheek, and your tongue strokes into his mouth. Lays out a litany of sentiments that you’re currently incapable of verbalising.
It feels like you kiss each other forever. But then you’re pulling back, pressing your foreheads together. And you stare into Azriel’s eyes as you tell him once again, “I love you.”
Emotion floods his eyes, and he holds you as close to him as he possible can, murmuring onto your mouth, “I love you, too. I think I always have.”
You know you always have. You tuck yourself into his side, content to feel his skin against yours. The rest of the world floats away. There is nothing and no one but you and him. Your Azriel.
Your eyes are growing heavy when he brushes his lips against your forehead, and he whispers the words you’ve needed to hear for so, so long.
“Whatever happens, Y/N,” another kiss joins the first, “you and I will face it together.”
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pom tags: @dream-alittlebiggerdarling @sirenpearldust @queercodedcharacter @azriels-shadowsinger @ruler-of-hades @demi03 @magicaldragonlady @abrielletargaryen @ralsieq @v3lv3tf0x @achase2002 @feyretopia @hayrunnwr @don’t-feed-the-hipsters @brekkershadowsinger @piceous21 @bloodicka @acourtofinkandpapyrus @riri-is-agirlie @siriusement @4valyries @socmono @azriels-mate123 @acourtofbatboydreams @katherinearcheron @nesemi @lupinswolfsbanes @dreaming-unafraid @dxnniiix @cyrygher @liddyr03 @lmllsl @nightless @teenageeggscissorslawyer @brighterthanlonelythoughts @blitz-fall @maybefoxysouls @mschanand1erbong @juiceboxreads @bangtanbecks @florencemtrash @hyemishii @obixix @thenovarose @meshellexplosionmurder @angzlxna @lissy31xoxo-blog @supernatural99 @positivewitch @art3-m1ss @milfhunter-pdx @bbuckysbeardd @coralseacourt @towhateverend87 @sspookz @bird-on-the-wire33 @morrie-rose @megwan @catscanteleport @sevikas-whore @thickthighs-sadeyes @hihelloitsbooktimeppl
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aniesvision · 4 months
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sometimes (matt sturniolo x bff!reader)
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warnings: dirty jokes, making out, oral, p in v, no use of y/n, just smut idk how to describe it (?) sorry if I'm missing something
a/n: hi! english is not my first language, but I really hope you like it and if anything's wrong please let me know 💜 also this is kinda long!!
synopsis: when Matt sees his best friend's boobs accidentally and he can't stop thinking about it afterwards.
🪻🪻🪻
I was finishing my shower and night routine, the bathroom door half open as I slide my long t-shirt on, deciding on not wearing a bra for better comfort.
-Hey, we're about to go to Burger King, do you... -I hear Matt's voice getting louder as he gets closer to the bathroom, mindlessly pushing the door open to see me, just to accidentally be surprised by the sight of my bare breasts. -Oh, shit, sorry.
I laugh, not really caring. He was a close friend and it was an accident, and honestly it was just my boobs.
-What were you gonna ask? -I get out of the bathroom, now fully dressed, throwing my wet hair back and out of my shirt.
-I don't... remember. -He keeps staring at the wall, cheeks slightly red in embarrassment.
I smile, taking a few steps closer to him and gently rubbing his arm with my hand.
-It's fine, Matt, not a big deal, I promise. -I try to make him less awkward, which kind of works since he looked at me again and smiled, nodding.
-Nice piercings tho. -He giggles, making me laugh and shake my head in disbelief with his comment.
Suddenly more footsteps could be heard and Chris' face appeared, he was clearly annoyed.
-What's taking so long? -He asks, looking at his brother for an answer.
This makes Matt remember his question, what he meant to do when he walked all the way over the bathroom.
-Oh, yeah, uh, do you wanna go to BK? -He asks, making me giggle a bit and nod.
-Why didn't you ask her when you got here?. -Chris asks, confused, crossing his arms and looking between me and Matt.
I could see Matt's cheeks turning red once more, making me laugh and tap his shoulder playfully, passing through him and Chris while I responded.
-He was freaking out 'cause he accidentally saw my boobs. -I explain, shrugging and taking a turn to reach the stairs to the garage.
Chris looks at Matt with his mouth shaped like an 'O' and eyes widen in shock.
-What the fuck? Did you really? -He asks his brother, letting his arms fall to his sides.
-Yeah. -Matt replies, shyly, putting his hands in his pockets.
-How did they look like? -Chris asks, again, with a playful smirk and clear curiosity. But also, to tease Matt about it. He wasn't gonna let his brother forget this moment ever happened.
-Alright, c'mon dude. -He shakes his head, pushing Chris down the stairs as his brother just laughed.
During the way in, me and Nick talked about Billie's new album and some other songs we liked.
Chris entertained himself with the songs playing, since he had aux, and Matt focused on driving most of the time.
(3rd person)
Matt was constantly fighting his thoughts, the scene of him walking in on you and accidentally seeing your boobs, the way they looked so firm, with the piercings decorating your nipples. He couldn't lie to himself, it was the most beautiful pair of boobs he has ever seen, and he was intrigued.
He didn't let things get awkward between them, still making jokes and talking normally to her, the words "she's still your best friend" repeating in his mind like a mantra.
Fortunately, Chris didn't mention what happened, which could be a good, but also bad thing.
If he wasn't talking about it now, means he's going to trap Matt into talking later, and Matt didn't really wanted to share details on how you looked. One because he respects you, two because he knows that if he speaks his brother might wanna take a look too and he's not infatuated about the idea of Chris also being able to see them, three because he knows you for months and you never seemed to care about this stuff, at least you didn't seem to care whenever you were around them, probably because you trusted them, and he didn't want to lose your trust. Or you.
The not so healthy dinner got to an end and you were all on your way back to their house.
You were never picky when it was time to choose whose room you were going to crash in, always leaving it to the boys to decide. And Matt was quick to ask you to stay in his tonight.
Half of his mind scared of Chris asking you to stay with him, the other half scared of sharing a bed with you after what happened. And the thoughts that would go through Chris's mind, considering he knows what happened too, only makes it worse.
But you accepted it. And you didn't really mind, you love all three of them and already did shared a bed with all of them anyways.
You all say your goodnights, Nick's climbing the stairs to his room to edit a video that should be out tomorrow, Chris hugging you with a smirk that only Matt could see, making sure to kiss your cheek and yell "don't make too much noise, kids!" before disappearing.
Matt rolls his eyes at his brother's tease, pulling you by the hand with him to his room.
First it wasn't so different from all the times you've spend with him in his room. You've talked about life, games, songs, a new show you guys were both watching. There was a quick brake to brush your teeths and other night routine things, and you were now both back on his bed.
You were sitting cross-legged on the left side of his bed, plugging the charge to your phone, and he was sitting with his legs spread, mindlessly scrolling through his tiktok. The silence was comfortable, and you take a deep tired breath before letting yourself rest your head on his shoulder and watch some videos with him.
(end of 3rd person)
-Feeling sleepy yet? -He asks, with a cute smile, looking down at me and locking his screen, placing his phone on his nightstand.
-Just a bit. -I smile back, sitting upright and covering my legs with the blanket.
He lays beside me, gesturing me to do the same, so I do, and now we're both sideways facing each other.
(3rd person again)
Matt couldn't shake his thoughts away. Even now, after knowing it was possible to just act friendly and pretend nothing happened, something inside him almost screamed. It was like a gigantic need that he was battling against, the urge to just ask her to see them again. To see those, unfortunately for him, perfect boobs once more. As friends, of course. He wouldn't do anything, just stare.
He didn't say anything, how could he? But the way his eyes looked at her, so confused yet intrigued. She knows him well, something was going on in his mind and she could tell.
-What's up? -She asks, placing one hand under her head, looking at him intently.
-Nothing. -He lies, smiling, trying to forget his own mind.
But he couldn't fool her.
-You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. -She's quick to announce, gently pressing her free hand on his arm to comfort him.
She didn't want him to feel pressured or like he needed to say what was bothering him if he didn't want to share.
There's a moment when he tries to make it all seem like he was just tired, turning on the tv and off the lights. The background noise and illumination making his heart beat faster, he knows he can't just simply ignore everything, or ignore her. So, when they were almost about to just go to sleep and not even speak about it, he sighs.
-Are you sure you didn't mind what happened? I feel guilty. -He finally speaks his mind, making her head turn to look at him with a small assuring smile.
-I don't mind at all, Matt, you don't need to feel guilty, it wasn't your intention, I get it. And I mean, it was just some boobs, you probably saw lots of them throughout your life. -She shrugs, really seeming like she didn't care.
It only fuels his courage to get more into it.
-Not that many, but with piercings was a first. -He decides to keep the mood light, just on top of the friendly barrier.
-And what did you think? -She asks, with a playful smirk, finding it amusing how he was slowly starting to feel more comfortable to talk about it.
Of course she wanted to talk things through, but didn't want to be the first mentioning it.
-Looks hot. -He shrugs, like it was oh so easy for him to let these words come out his mouth.
The sound of her laughter makes him even more confident, it shows him that yes it's okay for them to talk about it, and even to make some flirtatious comments. It was almost like he forgot they're close friends with all the embarrassment from earlier.
-Well, I appreciate it. It must look good if it hurts so bad to do it. -She carelessly shove her hand under her long t-shirt, cupping one of her boobs to feel the jewelry there.
His eyes follow her hand, and for a second he wishes it was his hand there instead. It was like he couldn't stop those unfriendly thoughs. Even knowing they're just friends and he shouldn't see her like that, it was hard not to.
-When did you get them? -His question was somehow innocent, he wanted to keep the conversation going.
-Almost a year ago I guess. -She starts playing with the jewelry, moving it side to side, Matt's eyes following it, containing his body from shoving her hand away and doing it himself.
-Does it hurt when you move it? -He lifts his eyes to hers, making sure he wasn't being caught staring at her boobs.
-Nah, nothing hurts anymore, it's all good. At first it was weird, and honestly I think it's all about looks, from all I've heard it doesn't taste the best. But I mean, it does probably taste like metal, what the fuck do anyone expect?
She rambles, giggling after her small vent, her eyes finding Matt's. He had a tiny smirk on his lips, and a know-it-all face like he was about to say she just said the most obvious thing ever. But he doesn't. Instead, he decides to taste the water.
-I mean, probably yeah, but I wouldn't mind the metal taste.
His words caught her by surprise, her eyes widening just the slightest bit.
-Oh, really?
He was scared of crossing the limits. But she was also giving him open doors to flirt with her. Matt was trying to keep things slow and friendly, with a little bit of flirting, but he wasn't exactly prepared to see where things would go from here. Although, he wouldn't and couldn't stop himself. Not now, when his dick is already starting to grow hard.
His only response was to look at her with a shrug, his way of confirming it without seeming so desperate.
-Well, alright, I mean, if you ever wanna try it...
She doesn't waste any time giving him one more extremely open door, a fucking gigantic wall of opportunity. She also made it look like it wasn't a big deal, but she was clearly offering him to change things in their friendship. And he would be insanely crazy to turn it down.
-Just to know if I like it, right? -Matt smirks grow, and the way she bites her lips and nods is all he needs to cross that line.
(end of 3rd person)
Matt moves his hand to the side of my body, pulling me closer. He keeps us just mere inches apart, our breathing mixing together. He keeps his eyes on mine, his hand gently caressing my waist, before slowly lowering it to the hem of my t-shirt.
We were almost having a telepathic conversation, his eyes asking for permission and a quick nod of my head encouraging him to slide his fingers under my shirt. The coldness of his fingertips contrasting with my warm skin makes me fold my lips to prevent myself from sighning loudly.
He starts to slowly explore my skin, his fingers curiously roaming around the new territory. Matt finally makes his move by slightly brushing his fingertip on my nipple. He feels the cold jewelry, how hard my nipples were, how the piercing could easily slide side to side.
I had to close my eyes when his gaze felt too intense and I let myself sigh when I feel his hand squeezing my breasts. It only makes it easier for him to keep it going and feel free to do more.
Matt quickly take control and push me backwards on the bed, hovering over me, keeping him up by his forearm next to my face while his other hand keeps squeezing and playing with my boobs.
I open my eyes to see him in a position I've never seen before. One of my best friends on top of me, squeezing my boobs. He notices my gaze and smiles, leaning down to press gentle kisses on my neck.
It was hard to keep the loud sighs from leaving, my head immediately tilting to give him more access. It didn't take long until he was lifting my t-shirt up my chest and attacking my nipples with his mouth, a loud surprised gasp escaping my lips.
He swirled his tongue around my nipple, licked it and sucked it lightly. My hand goes to his hair, pulling him closer as I throw my head back with eyes closed and lips parted.
He keeps the assault on my nipples, leaving red and purple marks on the valley of my boobs. Matt was clearly taking his time, enjoying it. He uses his fingers to pinch my right nipple while he kitty licked the other one, eliciting a low moan from my lips.
His lips keeps pleasuring me, making me look down at him when he starts to lower his kisses to the hem of my sweatpants. I prop myself on my elbows, not knowing what to say after all that, but he doesn't wait for me, slowly slipping my pants down my ankles, giving me time to stop him if I wanted to. But I didn't.
Matt starts kissing my thighs, my breathing getting heavier with each kiss. He leaves open mouth kisses on my inner thighs, his fingers sliding under the sides of my panties, gently pushing them down.
-Fuck, you're so beautiful.
His voice was low and hoarse, making me immediately clench around nothing and bite my lips. He leans his head enough to be in the middle of my thighs, and his tongue licks a stripe from my entrance to my clit, a shaky moan escaping my lips.
I let myself lay backwards again, one of my hands gripping the sheets and the other finding it's way back to his hair.
Matt eats me out like a starved men, moving his head and feeling every single detail and spot of my pussy with his tongue. His hands are on each of my thighs, keeping me still for him. Just the sight of him in between my legs, eating me out, was enough to make me wetter.
He for sure knows what he's doing.
My moans get louder, and I can't even stop them from coming when he's this good. He tongue fucks me, sliding one of his hands down my stomach and pushing my skin up with his thumb to kitty lick my clit.
-Matt, fuck, keep going. -I moan, my eyes rolling back.
I can feel his smirk when he moves his hand under his chin and slide one finger in, continuing his movements. My knuckles are white gripping the sheets, the tug on his hair tightened and I pull him even closer, my hips bucking and rolling against his face.
-Shit, Matt! -I moan his name loudly when I feel the familiar knot on my stomach starting to form.
He increases his pace, determined to make me finish, and with my persistent moans it was easy to see that I was close. It doesn't take long for the knot to snap and I release all over his face, my juices dripping down his chin.
He rides out my orgasm, pulling his face away and looking up at me before pushing his finger out. He licks his finger clean and hovers over me again, my chest rising and falling rapidly and my half lidded eyes meeting his.
He smiles, wiping my juices out his chin with the top of his hand, his eyes looking down to my lips. I wrap my arms around his neck, pulling him into a kiss. I could feel my own taste on his tongue.
My hands are quick to lift his shirt, the fabric soon discarded with my own clothes on the floor. Feeling his skin so close to mine was so different, yet so good. His pants were next on the floor and my hand was fast to palm his bulge. He was big, I could feel it over his boxers, it would be painful to fit.
When we were both fully naked, I let myself stare down his body. His lips curved into a smile, his hand stroking his shaft a few times before teasing my folds with his tip.
-Are you sure? -He asks, in a low voice, not stopping the teasing for a second.
-A hundred percent sure. -I nod, feeling him slide his tip in.
I gasp in pleasure and surprise, my eyes closing to focus on adjusting when he pushs all of him at once.
-Fuck, so tight. -He whispers, burying his head on my shoulder.
-Tell me when to move. -Matt's voice is quiet, like he was battling not to thrust unless I was comfortable enough.
I take my time to adjust, shifting under him to find the best position. When I finally feel ready, I give him the permission to move and he does. And god it feels so good.
He begins to bite a few hickeys on my neck, one of his arms keeping him up and the other pulling my leg up to thrust deeper. His hand was on my thigh, keeping my leg up, and my hands were leaving bruises on his back.
His thrusts were fast and deep, hitting all the right places. He pulls away from my neck just to kiss me again, a slow and sloppy kiss that didn't match the pace of his thrusts, but made everything feel better.
-Touch yourself, sweetheart. -He orders, still with his lips against mine.
My heart skips a beat with how hot it was to hear him saying that, and I easily comply, moving one hand to rub circles on my clit.
My moans are swallowed by his kiss, the sensitivity and intensity of the situation making another orgasm build up my stomach.
-Matt, fuck, I... -I cut the kiss to warn him, his eyes finding mine.
-Go on, cum all over my cock for me.
His dirty words were enough to make me climax once more. A loud moan of his name hanging from my lips, encouraging Matt to fuck me harder and faster to ride my orgasm and reach his own.
-Fuck, where do you want me? -He asks, his voice desperate and shaky.
-In me. -I whisper, immediately feeling his hot seed filling me up.
Our foreheads were together, both of us catching our breaths. He slowly pulls out and collapses on the bed beside me. I whine when I feel our mixed cums dripping down my shaky legs.
-I'll get us cleaned. -He announced, standing and reaching for a towel.
He cleaned himself, then cleaned me up and helped me wear my clothes again, pressing a quick kiss on my forehead.
-Do you need anything? Water? Need to pee? -He asks, looking at me with attention, and I smile with the way he was so caring.
-I'll go pee, can you get us some water in the meantime?
He nods and we do exactly what we said. It's just when we lay down together again that I realize what we just did. Matt looks at me quietly, pushing a strand of hair out off my face and behind my ear.
-Matt... -I call his attention, witch he immediately granted.
-Yes, sweetheart?
-We fucked. -I tilt my head a bit, confused with my own choice of words, but he only laughed and nodded.
-Yeah, we did. -His hand slide down my waist, pulling me closer to him.
-And... uh, now what?
I went straight to the point, although my words weren't exactly good to show what I was implying. It would be okay if he said it was just it and we're just friends, but I kind of didn't want it to be just an one time thing.
-I don't know.
He also seemed confused, not sure where this would lead us.
-Are we just going to ignore it and pretend it didn't happen, or we're going to acknowledge it but keep things friendly from now on, or we'll be able to do it again someday?
I ask, and he smiles cutely, pressing a quick peck on my lips.
-I don't want to just ignore it. I'm not sure if I'll be able to keep things friendly after that, only if that's what you want, but if your willing to I'd rather continuing fucking you sometimes.
He laughs, and I couldn't help but giggle too.
-You're an idiot. But, yeah, I'd actually like that.
-Oh, so you want me to keep fucking you. -He smirks, squeezing my waist, and I laugh at him.
-Shut up, Matt. Only sometimes. -I roll my eyes, and he pulls me into another kiss.
-I'm good with that.
a/n: omg this is TERRIFYING how do you guys post this kind of stuff so normally 😭 it was fun to write but it's so scary to post, I really hope it's at least understandable lol
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tan1shere · 4 months
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Bent Over
Ellie williams x female reader !
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A/n: YES ANOTHER AM SONG INSPIRED FIC !! but I was listening to teddy picker and the lyrics are just 🤌🏻 and I ofc had to do this with Els cuz she fits Arctic Monkeys the best
Summary: you have to go out for a small family dinner with your girlfriend, Joel, Maria, and Tommy.
Warnings: smut ! Mdni. Bratty reader ? The reader just doesn't give up on trying to tease Ellie. Soft dom Ellie yall !!! 🥰 (I'm so obsessed with soft doms oh my) sub reader, oral (r receiving) swearing ?? Orgasm denial - think that's it <3
Masterlist
You wouldn't consider yourself a very fancy person, but considering you and Ellie had only been going out for 4 months, it was probably about time you met some of her family. The flowy black dress that hug your curves was gorgeous, you had to admit but you weren't use to it at all. Even tho this was Ellies family she still wanted to dress right. She had a lovely suit on. Its one thing you loved about her, how comfortable she was. It's not that you didn't feel comfortable in this dress, you loved it. You hardly got to wear them. You just felt a little unusual. "You look-" Ellie couldn't find the correct words. Beautiful, gorgeous, stunning? She wanted to use them all quite frankly.
"Els you look even prettier." You say sweetly, going over, fixing her tie and her hair just a little. "Youre perfect." She blurts out. And thats all it took to ease all those nerves in you. You had made a plan not to drink too much tonight either. Lightweight was an understatement, one drink and you were gone. So you had to be careful you couldn't fuck this up. Especially when you could get a bit intense when you were drunk, even a little bratty. So it was a must that you didn't do that infront of them.
You and Ellie had arrived to the restaurant not too long after. Seeing, Joel, Tommy, and Maria already there and seated. "Sorry if we are a bit late." Ellie says apologetically, hugging Joel first. "We were just early kiddo, no need to be sorry." He says hugging back. "Well guys, this is my girlfriend, Y/n." She says motioning for you to go over. You give them a smile, giving each a polite hug. "It's nice to finally meet you." Maria smiles. "It's nice to meet you all too." You begin to sit down looking at the menu. "Ellie wouldn't stop braggin 'bout you, didn't even know if you were real." Tommy states, to which Ellie kicks his foot under the table. "Ow-" "But it's so good to finally meet you hun." Joel gives a kind smile. You return it but your attention turns to Ellies you could tell she wanted this to go smoothly.
The drinks were coming around, and it's not like you weren't going to have atleast one. Ellies mistake, which she was going to do was monitor it. When she soon saw how fast you were drinking on your second one her eyes widened, grabbing it and setting it down. "Slow down there babe." She whispers slightly, then giving you quite the look. You blink slightly, hadn't even realized the pace you were going at. Oops. "So Y/n, how long have you been living here." Maria asks, to which your beginning tipsy self, didn't hear. "Ehem." Ellie coughs out, bringing you to reality again. "Oh- pardon, uhm since I was about 2." You smile at her. "And have you always lived around here?" Tommy pipes up. "It differs, I haven't lived around here my whole life but different areas." You go for another sip of your drink.
That feeling started to creep up on you, and you hadn't really shown it. Making Ellie oblivious. But you had no control over your next move. Your hand moves to hers that's resting on her thigh, you go to grab it placing it on yours instead. Normal right? Until you smirk slightly. Your hand moves up, and up- "Ellie?" Joel inquires as she suddenly chokes slightly on her food. "Im good I'm good." She gives him a reassuring smile. "But you're not. - Y/n. Stop it." Ellie whispers in your ear, trying to get you to stop drinking anymore, you knew you'd hate yourself tomorrow. She looks at you, her whispering got lower. You just shrug. "Don't." She mouths. But that only made you want to do it more.
Next move was to put your own hand on her thigh, it flexes as soon as she feels it. She lets out an annoyed breath. "How's everyone's food?" Tommy then asks. "I love mine." You say in the most sickly sweet voice. This makes Ellie bite her cheek. "A word?" She begins to get up, grabbing your hand. "Excuse me, you guys. I forgot to ask her something before we left." They all nod. "Alright babygirl, take your time." Joel gives a sweet smile yet again.
"What the hell are you doing." She speaks, all too calmly for your liking, figuring she'd be more pissed off. You knew that's not how Ellie was. She never had to yell to get you to shut up. "Huh?" You think. "I dunno." You smile at her. "You just look so good Els." She scoffs slightly. "Behave." She goes to walk away. "Well maybe you should've kept an eye out." Her movements still, she doesn't say a word. Uh oh. You shut up for a second til her head turns. "Hey baby?" You hum. "Dont be surprised when you get bent over."
Your hands scramble to grip the couch. "I-" She tuts. "Nuh uh, you started this pretty girl. Why don't we just finish it." You go to sit back up but that was clearly no use. "This is basically your fault." You speak, voice muffled by the cushion. Her laugh echoes throughout your guys living room. "Oh, baby, baby baby. I wasn't the one making a fool of myself was I? Hmm?" You stay silent, unable to find the words, as you feel her hand come in between your thighs. Your mouth hangs open slightly. They squeeze together, making her hum. "I told you, but you were dying for it-" "No, i-" her finger slips inside your underwear, slipping into your entrance making you shut right up. "What was that?" Her tone was soft, but her intentions were definitely the opposite. "Nothing, I swear." You let your eyes shut, letting out a slight moan as her finger goes deeper.
"That's what I thought." Then all of a sudden her finger was gone. And just like that, she had you wrapped around her finger. You curse at yourself but it turned you on more how easily she could shut you up. It was hot nonetheless. You sit up, facing her now. Grabbing onto her collar and bringing her in for a kiss. Falling backwards her hands land beside your head, keeping her upright. The kiss got more heated by the second. You slowly begin to grind up into her, knowing she can't resist you. "God you're foul." She smirks against your lips. It only transfers to your lips, but wider. "Know you love me." She just shakes her head, that smirk never leaving.
Her hands pin yours above your head so effortlessly, keeping that kiss going. Until she moves to your neck, then lower. Reaching your cleavage. Her soft fingers go for the straps of your dress and pull them off your shoulders. They move down to the bottom, getting a good grip and tugging it off you. Your nipples harden at the cool air. Ellie bites her lip slightly. "This should be fun." That confused you tons. But oh boy were you not ready for what she had in store.
"Ellie.." You breathe out as you arch your back. "Hmm?" She was antagonizing you. The need to cum had been relentless and she denied it everytime. You were overstimulated to the max, making her enjoy eating you out for the longest time. "Do you know how much-" Suck. "I fucking love you and-" Suck. "This God damn pussy." Your head falls back at her words, her movements. "Ellie just please!" Your begging voice only turned Ellie on more. Her face comes into view. She gives you a fake pout. "But my baby, why should I?" Her smirk was evident and she was awful at hiding it. "Please Ellie just let me cum please." You finally felt slight tears at how desperately you craved it.
Bingo. "Alright, ok. I suppose-" You sit up so fast giving her a look. But it subsides as she almost pulls off all together. Your eyes turn pleading. "You can cum baby, I promise." And Ellie never, broke a promise. You let out a breath of relief as her tongue gets back to work. "F-fuck!" You scream out as you felt your most likely 4th orgasm of that night. But finally she was going to give you that relief. And God did her tongue do absolute wonders. She knew how to get you squirming. "Come on baby, I got you. Let go."
Your breathing was increasing, moans, whimpers were all that could be heard. "Ellie-" You gasp as you feel her fingers enter you. "You're so tight. Fuck." Her words only encourage you more. "Fuck, Ellie!" She hums against you, and youre seeing stars. "There you go good girl, cum on my tongue. Just like that." Your eyes flutter close as you finally do so. Feeling so worn out as you slowly come down from your high. There was some silence as she sat back up. "Gotta say. You were the yummiest thing I had tonight." She smirks down at your tired figure. You let out a dry laugh, having no energy but still finding her funny.
"I love you."
"I love you too, Els."
997 notes · View notes
asapeveryday · 5 months
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SHOCK FACTOR★彡 PART 3
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Previous. Next.
Pairing: Paige Bueckers x Rival!Reader
Warnings: swearing, suggestive jokes/language, tension
Summary: having Paige’s number means she can bother you whenever she wants, but maybe a night out with her isn’t a bother at all.
A/n: enjoy guys 😇lmk what you think of this one
YOU
is this paige?
???
Has anyone else given you their number since you got here?
YOU
no…
PAIGE
Aight, so who else would it be then? 🤘🏼
YOU
i should’ve thrown out that napkin tbh!🙂
PAIGE
Ignoring that. How’s the hangover?
YOU
it’s ok. getting coffee helped ig
PAIGE
Having another night out might help too…if u fw that
YOU
with you? id rather die then “fw that” 🙏
PAIGE
Ok rot in ya hotel room see if I care 🤷🏼‍♀️
Seen.
PAIGE
Actually nvm I feel bad for ur miserable ass. U shud fr go out and see what Connecticut has to offer. Ever been to Gianni’s?
YOU
no i haven’t, I’ve only been here for like two days. is it italian food?
PAIGE
Only the best in town 😉 u shud def go
YOU
ugh I would but i have to see if elaine can take me cus my teammates are busy
PAIGE
I could take u if u want?
YOU
typing…
YOU CAN FEEL yourself getting socially drained as you text her, at least that’s what you tell yourself. Paige is infuriating and arrogant, which comes with the deadly additions of charisma and the ability to keep you on edge with every word spoken, or even typed.
You’d always known of this, even before your game with her that day. A player like Paige can be hard to come across; perfectly capable, talented and independent yet somehow the best team player out there, sharing passes she can without a doubt make. Why? Because she doesn’t need to prove anything.
It often bothered you, especially since you constantly needed to prove yourself during the start of your college career. You took every shot you could get your hands on, and she gave shots away like candy whilst still having a huge reputation as a player. Obviously it went deeper than that, but the simple fact just stuck to your brain.
You can’t help but recall her face, inches from yours attempting to pry your ball from your grasp. Like she was deserving, like it was hers for the taking. She had made a similar face on the panel where she dissed you soon afterwards, and then again while watching you at the bar, and just before writing her number on the napkin. You wondered if she was making that face right now as she texts you.
PAIGE
I could take u if u want?
The text is simple but it summons some sort of unique feeling in you. Paige Bueckers is offering to pick you up in her car, on her night off, and take you to a restaurant. And you, for whatever reason, are considering saying yes.
Sighing to yourself, you weigh your options. Option one: you sit around your hotel alone till your teammates come back, most probably drunk from a bar since it’s a Saturday. Option two: you ask Elaine to take you out once again, even though you’re probably gonna see her the whole week you’re here. Option three: you let the girl who shit-talked you at a post game conference take you out for dinner.
YOU
i guess i should go out. DONT act like ur doing me a favour tho….n if I don’t have fun i’m blocking u.
PAIGE
Drop the addy. I’ll come by in an hour
Seen.
After hurriedly pulling yourself together, taking an Advil, checking out the restaurant’s Instagram and getting ready you can’t help but find your heart steadily hammering inside of you. Paige is coming to your hotel. You’re gonna be in her car. She’s taking you to her favourite restaurant. This has to be the most peculiar thing that has happened all year.
-
The car ride is significantly better then you expected it would be. Paige adamantly seems to prevent any room for awkward silence to seep through, commenting on your outfit and filling the vehicle with music that makes the interior buzz from the volume. She has a free look on her face, chair reclined more then you’d dare if you were in the drivers seat, hair blowing in her face from the windows being down.
“I’m surprised you’re driving me out.” You say, finally airing what was on your mind.
Paige shrugs. “Didn’t feel like drinking today. Plus, I’m in the mood to be generous and show you what Storrs has.”
“If someone told me I’d be hanging out with Paige Bueckers like a week ago, I think I’d be fucking appalled. Or disgusted. Or both.” You laugh.
She chuckles, glancing at you sneakily. “You swear a lot, don’t you?”
“Awe my bad.” You pout, giving her a fake-concerned look. “Forgot you can’t handle a little language.”
“I can handle it,” she grumbles. “I just think cursing is better for specific situations.”
“Like what?”
Paige wets her lips almost sheepishly, but she keeps her eyes straight on the road. “Like sex.”
A beat passes before you respond “Sorry I couldn’t savour a couple words for you and your little kink.”
She looks over at you now, and you meet her gaze as equally as you can. She just lets out a smile, shaking her head to herself as she pulls into the parking lot. You try to ignore the elevator-sinking feeling in your stomach from her words as you get out from the car.
The restaurant is beautiful. It’s cozy, ambient and well decorated. Not too fancy and not too full, just perfect. You’re seated in a more secluded area, per Paige’s request. She orders for you, insisting she knows exactly what to get for the best possible experience.
The food is good, and you don’t feel the need to hide it from Paige, who visibly grows at your praise for the place she picked out.
“So, are you jus in Connecticut for Elaine?” She says.
“Not really.” You reply. “Me and some of the others are just doing a little East Coast road-trip. I wasn’t really interested in coming to Storrs, but it made sense to come by and see her.”
“For a whole week?” She raises her eyebrow. “Seems like you’re close.”
“I was only gonna stay in Storrs for a couple days, then go to Hartford but the girls seem to like it here.” You shrug. “They think it’s cute, being a small town and all, but it’s pretty boring if you’re not a student.”
“It’s better if you’re with fun people.” She smiles.
“I hope you don’t think you’re fun.”
“Compared to Elaine I definitely am.” Paige scoffs.
You can’t help but feel a little more hostility than humour in her tone.
“Do you guys know each other?” You ask, as sly and innocent as you can muster. Paige seems hesitant.
“Nah.” She finally decides. “I mean, we’ve talked before. Ion know her personally.”
“It’s kinda funny, she said she doesn’t pay much attention to you but I think she might have a little crush.” You laugh.
Paige visibly stiffens at this, which catches you by surprise.
In a split second she regains her calm, unbothered composure. “What has she said?”
“Not much.” You shrug. “Just seems a little interested.”
Paige’s jaw clenches for a moment, and you’re not surprised when she changes the subject. “How many people have been on your case since I posted that picture of us from the bar on my story?”
“God, so many.” You laugh, shaking your head. “You?”
“You don’t even wanna know.” She scoffs. “Not sure why everyone was so crazy bout it though, s’not like we were beefing for real.”
“Right!” You say, happy she seems to be on the same page. “It was just some petty crap. I guess people just really were hoping there would be some rivalry.”
You think for a moment, before saying. “Maybe we should keep this drama thing up. Might be fun.”
“It’s a lil too late for that,” Paige shakes her head with a slight smile. “remember how KK and Ice were on live yesterday at the coffee shop? Yeah, we kinda were in the background at some point. People saw us talking.”
“You’re joking.”
“Dead serious. There are edits and everything.”
You rest your head in your hands, elbows on the table, lessening the proximity between you and her. “I only get into these weird ass situations when I interact with you, Paige.”
She sits up in her seat, blue eyes quickly looking you up and down. “Yet you’re still here.”
“Girl’s gotta have fun.” You shrug. Her foot hits yours under the table, her eyebrow raised as if challenging you. You have a sudden thought of going under the table and letting your hands unzip her cargo pants, but instead you just kick her back.
“Wanna go?” She asks. You don’t want to go back to the hotel, and she seems to pick up on it. “The area we’re in is nice. We can walk around a bit.”
You smile and nod. “Split the bill?”
“Fuck no.” She shoots you a look, pulling out her credit card from the back of her phone.
“You cursed!” You exclaim, to which she scoffs.
“I said it’s alright in specific situations.”
Now it’s your turn to scoff. “Well we’re not having sex, are we?”
The way her eyelashes flutter at your question gives you jitters. “Aight, stop talking.” She finally manages to respond. You just send her a look that you hope makes her nervous.
-
“You’re not funny.” She grumbles, attempting to grab your phone from you.
“Back off, Bueckers! I’m serious.” You laugh, sidestepping her with your phone above your head. The street was empty and the lights were on, putting the two of you in a yellow glow against the night. You’d been walking around the neighbourhood, observing houses and learning a bit about Storrs for the past hour.
“Give me your phone, I know you ain’t deleting those.” She huffs, grabbing for your phone. You try to escape her grasp but she’s got longer limbs, so eventually your phone is in her pocket and she’s wearing a proud look on her face.
It’s nice to walk in the quiet of evening, her beside you. You have no idea where you are but you can’t help but trust she can get you back to the car in no time. Not just yet though.
You turn to look at Paige almost shamelessly. There’s just so much to observe with her. Her confident posture, toothy smile, sleek straightened blonde hair, even the baggy cargo pants and sweater. She always looked good, it never failed to annoy you.
“Either your pants are too tight or crazy baggy.” You note. She just raises her eyebrow.
“Sounds like you just want me to take my pants off at this point.”
“Wouldn’t mind a little show.” You reply almost instantly, shocking yourself at the surge of confidence. She doesn’t seem taken aback, in fact she’s intrigued.
“Is that your usual routine? Have a meal out then have a meal at home?”
“Maybe it is.” You shrug. “I never object to a wine n dine.”
“And what exactly would you object to?”
“Cocky girls who think they’re the shit.” You say, turning your head to face her. You don’t mean to target her, but she simply smiles.
“Is it really being cocky if I can back it up though?” Paige asks quietly. You’re not walking anymore, stuck in place on an empty path between buildings. She’s closing in on you until your back hits a brick wall. The way Paige is staring down at you, hands in her pockets, lip between her teeth. It’s nothing you’d object to, ever.
“I won’t believe it till I see it.” You mutter, holding her eye. The air is tense in a new way that you haven’t felt with her since you first met in the bar. Her face is entrancing.
Paige’s hands lift your jaw upwards, and she leans into your ear. “You might not see it,” she mumbles, breath hot against your skin. “But you’ll definitely feel it.”
When she pulls back from your ear she stays hovering just above you, hands chastely holding your head up. You’re in the perfect position to kiss, and you can’t stop your eyes from darting between her electric stare to her lush, pink lips.
You can literally feel her breath on your mouth when a piercing ring cuts through the moment. It’s coming from her pocket, and she pulls out your phone. Paige’s face twists as she reads the screen. “It’s Elaine.”
“Just- just decline it.” You rush out, not caring how desperate you sound. You can feel how wet you are, and the lack of heat against you is blaring.
“She texted you too.” Paige scoffs. “She’s waiting for you at your hotel.”
You don’t even know what to say. Paige’s face is expressionless. You’re disappointed, but there’s no point in begging. Nothing really happened.
“Let’s get you home.” She says, starting to walk back from where you came. “Shouldn’t keep her waiting.” Her tone is dripping with toxicity. It makes you shiver.
623 notes · View notes
jakesangel · 4 months
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jake helping you w heavy periods -requested
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heavy periods isn't something funny. cramp pains on the lower side of your belly, so heavy they will even spread to your lower back and thighs. on the worst days, the discomfort even interferes in daily activities. but since dating jake he wouldnt leave you alone in this : being with jake, means being supported 100% at all times. at first he didn't get it tho : seeing you suddenly in pain and in some kind of mood he wasn't used to it, he would freaked out, thinking your mad at him. are you okay, baby ? did i do something wrong ? he'd pout to you, not understanding at first on your sudden change. after explaining him you current condition, he'd be relived to know you aren't mad at him but he'll still be sad to be helpless. he would be extra cuddly, rubbing your skin where he thinks would help you, or kissing those places. he would also be more soft on you, understanding that your mood swings are coming from your hormones n you are'nt purely mad at him
after that jake would never be unprepared again. he had bought heat pack for you lower body pains, snacks, pads or tampon of different size, n kept all of those in a designed place for you in his bedroom. jake would never leave his angel in pain alone, so either you're at his dorm or your own place, he will come to you w those product to help. you also don't need him to tell him when you get your periods, as he would track them thanks to phone apps. he won't tell you tho, he will just be extra caring on those days, leaving you comforting and supportive text messages and bringing you your favorite food and snacks on those days. he would even buy you a special plushie, he'd ask you to hug when he isn't there for you, dressing it w your fav shirt of his and spraying his perfume on it.
but one the days he is finishes his schedule earlier, he will come to you, without forgetting to bring the products he bought especially for those days. he would text you before coming over , telling you that he will use the emergency keys of your apartment. once arrived, he will super soft for you : he would become your legs and your arms, holding you in his arm, bridal style, because you are his princess, if you need to go to the toilet. he wouldn't hold you without making you laugh, dramatically playing like a knight, trying to make you forget about your current pain. i'm afraid that won't be possible, princess y/n, he'd say taking your body in his, me as your knight in armor, wouldn't less such princess use her feet in such situation, he would add, taking you to your bathroom. he would also make sure to keep the heat pack, warm on your body and his hands soothing your lower back, soothing you.
if your cramps are terrible, he would pout at your sight, feeling helpless is an awful feeling form him specially where youre the one in need of help. he will remain by your side tho, actively looking for pills against periods pains n would bring them along your snacks. he would then kiss you as a reward to be this strong for taking the médecine but also enduring this pain every month. you're so strong baby, i could never do it, hed say kissing your temple. or if your mood isn't the best, he will endure them and not make you feel invalid. oh baby why are you crying, he'd hold your face w both of his hands holding your cheeks, the movie is this munch for you right now, no ? he would then add, swiping away your tears. lets put something less emotional, m'okay baby ?, he'd finish, softly kissing you, adorationn spreading out of his body.
notes : hai anon here is ur request >< i wasnt so sure of what you wanted so i tried to stay general, tho i hope it still pleases you >< please lemme kno in the inbox !! i also hope youre done w ur periods <3
@imaluckygirl @luvj4key @stwrjvke @goldenretrieverjakezgirlbaby @jaeyunpinkyring @pockettwinzz @jwsdoll @heeheeswifey
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cheesesoda · 1 year
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resident evil men as parents!
a/n: i had this idea randomly so i wanted to write some headcanons 💪 lmk if you wanna see the girls as parents! (i might edit these headcanons and add more later too)
cw: slight mention of smoking and alcohol
genre: fluff, headcanons/blurb
______________________________________________
leon kennedy
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leon is a girl dad!
cried when she was born
from when she was born until age 1 he would just go into her room at night and watch her sleep
he spoils her fr
youll come home late from work (well past her bedtime)
there they are making ice cream sundaes in the kitchen
he participates in tea parties and he enjoys it
he tells even MORE dad jokes now
very protective
tries to drink less after his daughter is born
chris redfield
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chris is a girl and boy dad!
i think he has 1 boy (older) and 1 girl (younger)
like him and claire
was in awe when his kids were born
“oh my god she/he’s so small”
auntie claire babysits all the time
teaches his son to play football
honestly i think he’d be protective of his daughter but not as much as the others because he would teach her self defense from a young age
ethan winters
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ethan is a girl dad! (which we already knew)
we already know what hes like as a dad but i’ll still write a bit for him
100% cried so hard when his daughter was born
best husband and father
definitely bought every brand of diapers because he didnt know what to get
hes very affectionate and caring to his daughter
i don’t see him as the type of dad to kill any guy who speaks to her once shes older
if someone breaks her heart tho mans just might kill
albert wesker
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wesker is a boy dad!
very calm when he was born
not very affectionate
he does care he just doesn’t show it very well
luis sera
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luis is a girl and boy dad!
i think he’d have 2 or 3 kids
if he had 2 kids, he’d have 1 girl (older) and 1 boy (younger)
if he had 3 kids, he’d have 2 girls (oldest & youngest) and 1 boy (middle)
definitely sets a very high bar for how his daughter/s should be treated
teaches his son to be a gentleman definitely
loves all his kids so much
smokes less after his kids are born and would rather die than expose them to cigarette smoke especially when they’re babies
carlos oliveira
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carlos is a girl and boy dad!
you cannot tell me this man does not want a village of children
he would probably have 4 kids
i think he’d have 3 boys and 1 girl
has the biggest soft spot for his kids
he’s very non-toxic masculine with his sons
he always tells them he loves them, hugs them, etc.
he also has tea parties with his daughter
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noxtivagus · 2 years
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woah i. wrote a lot.
#to me friend ^^ yk the. that one. i ended up writing several paragraphs . I'M RLLY GLAD W MYSELF WAHHH 😭😭#there's sm i don't know yet though but i managed to. say at least a lot of what i've been meaning to say for a long time#i think i managed it maturely !!!! i reached out i'm so happy.#i want the best for my friend. n. yeah there's so much communication lacking but for now i think she needs space for herself#hopefully. sometime when all four of us r free we can. be direct w each other? yeah.#i'm. actually. mostly proud of how i'm handling this. hdfkajsdkfl wish i cld do so much more but..#yeah. this isn't enough. but i've taken a step at least. know i cld still do better but.#there's. rlly a lot i want to say. but. i think when we're all not quite as busy i'll try to yk. set a time where we can all talk#irl hopefully. hdjafsldf i rlly hope my words reached out to her tho :c#wish i cld still do more but i have my limits too n though i rlly try my best to be kind bcs i really mean it unconditionally#i have my boundaries.#i can't emphasize enough just how important it is to be able to do things for your own self so you can apply it to the rest of the world.#so.. i'll. say it outright here. i can't handle this on my own. all four of us have to put effort in it.#so. this seems a bit clearer at least. thankfully. aghhh i wrote a lot but i want to comfort her more directly too#i want to do. so much for each person in life i think i need to set more boundaries for myself or i'll get overwhelmed#n then it's not like every friendship has to have everything yk? but.#hdjaflsdfs no bcs for this. specifically rn. i care a lot for her she's one of my best friends after all n. for nearly 7 years#i know at least one of the things i rlly need in those sort of close friendships is. yk we can open up to each other n be honest#being honest at least. when it comes to venting i know i can just do that more on social media or. online friends#like when i say online friends btw 😭 i basically consider them irl friends n i value them very very much but#for the sake of. yk. we don't know each other irl irl so just difference in label. not the value n meaning it has for me.#so. yeah w ^^ we don't rlly share similar beliefs n views which is honestly pretty draining for me#so at the very least. hopefully sometime this/next month we can at least be direct abt that? to communicate so we can understand#i can understand ppl well enough like. uh. i'm good at piecing things tgther but there's so much gaps without direct communication#i can't guess all the time. but yk one thing abt myself that i'm. at least happy w is that. yk. i. can open up when needed#okay like it's hard when i have to do it directly to another person for my own sake but in this context w my friend. yes i can. 👍#that said though oh dear other than this. friend stuff rn there's also more i'm worried abt bcs. school. assignments. yeah#which i'll be able to do but i'm still a bit. stressed. n then for prom 10 per table but we're only 9 n we're all stags 😭😭#wanted at least to have my ^^ friend w me bcs. despite these stuff yk we're still friends :c but she's going w a partner yeah#n then there's more personal stuff too.. there's. a lot. too much to write. but i'll manage.
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iikatsukii · 2 years
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Too Late.
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synopsis: they loved you when it was too late. 
pairings: sully family x daughter/sister!reader, neteyam x twin!reader, neytiri x daughter! Reader, jake x daughter!reader
warnings: mentions of death, attempted suicide, suicidal thoughts(?), swearing, familial issues. 
word count: 3.6k
a/n: would yall believe me if i said i wrote this while listening to pussy talk by city girls LMFAOOOOO p.s. Happy valentines day (THE RED TEXT IS "FESTIVE" im trynna get into the valentines day spirit :D). I wish i could've given yall part two of illicit love instead of this but i'm not done with it </3. ALMOST THO!!! (gif creds: @world-of-pandora)
(p.s. part two is out now!!)
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it was never supposed to end like this. jake's mouth felt bitter. his whole body shook as he let out the most heart-stopping scream when his eyes landed on his eldest daughter. you, neteyam's twin, lay lifeless in his arms. your father cried because he never got to tell you he was proud of you, or that he loved you, or that you didn't need to compare to your brother to still be considered his baby girl. 
it wasn't always like this, though. 
you and neteyam were always happy and playing around together when you were younger. still, as you two grew older, neteyam took on olo'eyktan training and became his father's perfect warrior. where does that leave you? mo'at had chosen kiri to pursue tsahik training because of her apparent connection to eywa. so where does that leave you? lo'ak took on the role of the troublemaker, and tuk, of course, is just the baby of the family. so where does that leave you?
you're lo'ak's babysitter. making sure the boy doesn't get into trouble, but with your lack of training due to your father training your brother more than you, you weren't really the best babysitter. honestly, it was more lo'ak protecting than you protecting him. he kept you from losing balance while in high places, saved you when you fell into the rapids and flew you home when you forgot your way as if you had not lived in this forest your whole life. 
you felt like a burden on your family. 
nothing you ever did was right. 
you went hunting? cool, but you didn't bring back enough for the whole family, so now neteyam and lo'ak have to go out and find more food for everyone else. 
you bead a necklace for your friend? great, but you messed up the pattern she asked for, so she brought it to kiri so she could remake it.
tuk wanted to go play with you? of course! but now she has a sprained ankle from falling into the river while you were looking at flowers a few feet away.
and every time, somehow, some way, your family always managed to say something that felt like a blade stabbed through your heart.
"next time, y/n, just leave the hunting to neteyam and i. at least we know the right amount to bring back." it was lo'ak before he and your twin had to go hunting for more food for dinner a few weeks ago.
"you know, sister, your jewelry hasn't been the same recently. i've had sooo many of your friends coming back to me saying you messed up the pattern they asked for. just try and pay more attention when you're beading." kiri said as you walked into your home. she was re-beading the necklace you gave to your best friend yesterday. 
the one she told you was perfect and that she loved it.
"how could you leave your sister unattended like that y/n she could've been killed?! why can't you be like neteyam? you’re twins, for crying out loud, y/n. do you not care for your sister's well-being?" your father scolded you outside your grandmother's hut. you could hear her cries inside the tent, along with your mother's gentle words of comfort, as she tried to calm her youngest daughter down. 
you were being compared to your twin for the millionth time in your life, and as used to this as you should be, it still hurt just as bad as the first time your father had said it. 
"she only sprained her ankle. it was an accident sempu–" you tried to defend yourself, but you were cut off. 
"NO. it is, sir. do you understand me?" jake yelled at you. in your 18 years, your father had never raised his voice at you, let alone for you calling him 'sempu.' he used to love it when you called him because you were his ite and he was your sempu. but right now, to him, you were just someone who had hurt his child and nothing more than that. you hang your head, eyes falling to the floor in front of you as you didn't want your father to see you cry. 
"sorry, sir." was all you said before walking away. you don't know where you walked, but you found yourself at the abandoned shack. you knew this area was forbidden, so when you realized where you were, you immediately crouched. you were just gonna walk back because your father would kill you if he found out you were over here, but then you heard voices. you looked through the bush to see a group of 3 or 4 avatars. you knew you couldn't escape now, so you pressed on the collar of your neck.
"sempu– sorry. sir, i need help, i wasn't paying attention to where i was walking, and i can hear avatars speaking english and–" your father cut you off.
"where are you?" he, your mother, and your two brothers were patrolling around your land's territories when they heard you through their earpieces. 
you let out a heavy sigh, praying to eywa that he wouldn't chew your ass up for being here, before pressing the button again and saying, 
"i'm at the abandoned shac–AHH! OWW, LET GO, YOU ASSHOLE!!" you couldn't finish as one of the avatars found your hiding spot, grabbing you by your queue.
thankfully your family had heard enough. your twin telling his father he knew a shortcut, they all flew as fast as they could to you. honestly, this was their last straw. everyone was fed up with you constantly making things hard for everyone.
your mother, though, was worried. you were caught by those skydemons all by yourself. who knew what they would do to you?
as you waited for your family, you were roughly held by your queue as they poked and prodded at you like they had never seen a native before. 
"let me see your hands." the man with a buzzcut spoke. 
"why don't you look at my feet instead?" you said. they all gave you a confused look until you kicked quaritch right in his face. you don't know how, but it caused the avatar behind you to loosen his grip, so you tried to make a break for it.
unluckily for you, the female avatar grabbed your arm, pulling you back into her form. she gripped you by your neck, unaware that she had pressed the button on your communicator. you hissed at her. the man you had kicked was only laughing as he wiped the blood dripping from his nose. "she must be one of his. she's defiant. grab her hands, let me see." he said
the avatar behind you grabbed your hands, holding them both out. 
"hm… four fingers. maybe she's not one of his." were they gonna let you go? wishful thinking.
"fine. she may not be one of his but if one of their people go missing they're bound to come for her. keep her." his words made your heart sank. were they gonna take you? away from everything? your home? your family? if you could even call it that. 
but then you thought about it. you really can't call it that. you don't remember the last happy memory you had with someone, anyone, in your family. it clicked to you that it had been about 10 minutes since you had radioed your father, and he wasn't here yet. were they even coming for you? you knew it was a stupid question. they weren't coming for you. why would they when this was the easiest way to get rid of the weak link of the family? it's not like your blood would be on their hands, and their life would be way better without you.
"they're not gonna come for me. i have no family. you killed my family in the last war, you dickhead." you lied to the man you had kicked earlier. 
hearing you say this confused your family. what were you talking about?
"dammit you're an orphan? i didn't know the na'vi had any of those. then what do we do with her. she's useless. nobody will notice she's gone." the woman behind you asked her superior. 
"hmm.. i have a better idea. kill her. use her as a warning to the sullys. this is what we're capable of now. it'll be a threat. give us jake sully and nobody else will die. but this one… this one is our lab rat. we're gonna make you bleed out nice and slow little one." he said as he grabbed his pistol off his waist, pressing it below your jaw. the nickname made you internally gag, but you held your ground. 
these people had no real idea how tired you really were. you were exhausted. you were ready for life with eywa. you wanted your deity to hold you close, keep you warm, and protect you from the harsh real world. the world that your parents didn't adequately prepare you for. the world that you were ready to leave. 
"kill me," you said as you grabbed quaritch's wrist and moved his gun from under your jaw to right above your heart. "and make it quick. nobody will come for me anyways," you said in a monotone voice.
the avatars all looked at you in awe. they had never once seen a na'vi so willing to give up their life. the natives they had all met were vicious, hissing and armed, always ready to kill. but you. you were the opposite.
you were fed up and ready to die. but not for your people. for your own inner peace. 
"no," quaritch said, putting his gun down. that shocked everyone. like he shocked his soldiers and your family, who had been listening the whole time. they were trying to get to you as fast as possible.
hearing how you really felt was a wake-up call for your family. and when they heard bullets moving within the chamber of quaritch's pistol, they all flew their ikrans as fast as possible, weaving through trees and around mountains, trying to get to you.
you looked at the man like he had just betrayed you. 
"DO IT, YOU COWARD! FUCKING DO IT! NOBODY WILL COME FOR ME!! THEY DON'T CARE!! THEY DON'T FUCKING CARE!!" you don't know what came over you, but you tried to wrestle quaritch's pistol out of his hands. your family was only 2 clicks away and could hear you struggling. everyone landed at the same time. the sullys, excluding tuk and kiri, who had stayed with mo'at, caught quaritch's attention, which distracted him enough for you to pull the gun from his grip. 
you distanced yourself from everyone, and looking around, you realized you were surrounded by everyone. your family and these random avatar people. everyone could read you. you were a ticking time bomb and the only person in control of the trigger was you. one of the avatars took a step forward slowly, but you saw him move and point the gun at him. it didn't stop him from moving, but you heard screams of protest when you pointed the gun at your own head. that's when everyone froze. the avatars. your family. nature. time. eywa. you. everything was frozen.
"babygirl…" the nickname made you snap your neck to the man who was the root of your problems. 
"NO! no, you do not get to call me that. if i can't call you ma sempu, don't bother referring to me as your daughter." you said. your energy was depleted, and you knew you would only be able to stand here for a couple more minutes before you opened your own doors and walked to your great-mother. jake tried to take a step closer to you, which only caused you to tense up and pull on the trigger a little bit. everyone immediately backed up, your mother hissing at you through her tears. "MA ITE, PUT THE GUN DOWN," she screamed at you.
"sa'nok…" you whimpered, not even being able to look her in the eyes. 
"sa'nu… i can't" you sobbed. you could barely breathe and your tears were coming down in waterfalls at this point. you couldn't see anything clearly. your tears had blurred your vision. 
you knew your mom loved you. she and tuk were the only ones in the family who had never uttered a harsh word in your direction. though she was busy taking care of tuk, so it wasn't like you got much attention from them either. but there's no way you would blame her or tuk for that. if anything, you're sorry that you have to leave them, but this world isn't for you. you turned on your heels, looking at the man whose gun you took.
"you are a coward. you should've pulled the goddamn trigger. you're fucking pathetic. are you happy now? now everyone here gets to experience what they've waited so long for." nobody had ever heard you speak to anyone like that. honestly, they couldn't tell if your words were directed at quaritch or yourself. 
you inhaled, looking up at the eclipse, your bioluminescent freckles glowing brighter than they ever had in the nighttime as tears cascaded down your face. 
"goodbye," you said as you squeezed the trigger, hearing a loud bang and tons of screaming. you felt no pain, though. you opened your eyes, not realizing you had closed them, and looked around. you noticed your pistol was stuck in the tree in front of you with an arrow clean through it. you turned to your twin with hate in your eyes. he lowered his bow as he read your expression. 
"now you wanna save me?" your voice was weak but filled with venom. 
"why didn't you save me when you noticed i stopped hanging out with you guys? hm? why didn't you teach me when i was younger? huh? why didn't you talk to me other than when you were chewing my ass out for something that was A FUCKING ACCIDENT, GODAMMIT. WHY?!" you felt like your tears were endless. 
"WHY DIDN'T YOU LOVE ME?! ANSWER ME YOU FUCKERS!! WHY DON'T YOU LOVE ME?!" you screamed your frustrations at your father and brothers. none of them could look you in your eyes, save for your mother. "you only want to save me because you know how much i don't want to be saved anymore but it's too goddamn late," you said.
you turned to the female avatar who was holding you from before. you noticed her gun earlier and hoped you looked threatening enough for her to use it as you ran in her direction. she didn't know what to do. she didn't know you were a barely trained warrior or that you wouldn't have put a scratch on her. she didn't know you were harmless. all she knew was that you were a native, and the natives were hostile. 
so she pulled her gun out and fired two shots into your chest.
the momentum of the bullet was enough to stop you from running. you felt the searing pain start to blossom in your chest area. falling to your knees, your eyes met the woman who had shot you. you looked at her shirt, reading her name. it was a funny name to you, but you didn't care. she had fulfilled your wish without even knowing it. so you used your last breath to speak.
"thank you, z-dog" you slumped over on your side, as everything started to go slow. your vision was starting to darken, and you let it consume you, not wanting to fight for your life anymore. 
cue the screams and cries from your family and the fleeing steps of the rda soldiers. your chest stopped rising and falling, and your breathing had ceased. your family surrounded your body, trying to stop your bleeding and preserve the life that had already left your body. still, you had been shot twice, and both bullets had exit wounds. it was no use. nearby, na'vi had heard the screams of distress and had called over some hunters and scouts to investigate the scene since they knew the area was near the forbidden old shack.
the hunters and scouts arrived at the scene armed and ready to defend their people, but what they were met with was the last thing they expected to see. the eldest sully daughter was lying on the floor, motionless, with two bullet holes in her chest and her blood sinking into the forest floor. her family leaned over her body, screaming and crying for her to be okay and to return to them. they whispered how sorry they were. they whispered to her how if she came back, they would treat her right, teach her, hang out with her, and love her like they were supposed to. but it's too late.
nobody knew how to react. the eldest sully daughter had died, and nobody but her family knew what had happened. 
“ma ite, oel ngati kameie. i see you. i'm sorry, i'm so so sorry. you don't have to be your brother. being you was just fine." your father cried as he cradled your head. brushing your hair away from your face, getting blood on your cheek since his hands were covered in it. 
neteyam and lo'ak were each holding one of your hands. they cried as they watched their tears pool in your palm and then fall off the edge to drip into the soil below your body. they couldn't believe they treated you like anything less than their sister. they treated you like you were a stranger, a burden to deal with. and now that you were gone, they could not tell you how sorry they were for how they treated you.
neytiri was inconsolable. her firstborn daughter had just died in front of her eyes. willingly. she wanted this. her own daughter wanted to take her life. and she couldn't do anything to stop it. how could she not know? how did you go 18 years hurting in silence? how did she not know you needed to be saved? 
"ma ite. my baby. ma y/n." neytiri's heart shattered when she saw those bullets go through your chest. she cried over your body for what felt like hours, but it was only a few minutes until the male healers came so they could carry you to the healing tents to prepare you for your burial ritual. 
as jake pulled his mate from your body, she started to push against him trying to get him to let go of her so she could return to her daughter. 
eventually, jake lets go, unable to keep his mate from her child. he joined her and just asked the healers to give your family a minute with you. 
they just nodded in understanding, leaving your family to grieve. 
two pairs of footsteps rushed towards the clearing, where the family mourned one of their own. 
kiri and tuk had heard the news and came as fast as they could. tuk screamed, running up to you and curling herself into your chest as she sobbed into your neck. she didn't care if she was getting blood all over herself. you were her older sister, and she didn't even get to say goodbye. she felt nothing but sadness and loss. tuk felt terrible because the last time she had seen you was earlier when you brought her back from the stream because she had sprained your ankle. and now you were lying on the forest floor dead? how did this happen?
"HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?! SISTER, PLEASE!!" kiri begged you to wake up as she placed herself where her father was earlier. she rested your head in her lap, looking into your lifeless yellow eyes. you were her elder sister. as much as you didn't know, kiri looked up to you. she knew how hard you tried for the family, and though it wasn't your fault that you would mess up a necklace every once and a while, she couldn't help but feel guilty for the words she said to you in those moments. she knew she could've should've been nicer about it. 
when it was finally time for the healers to take your body, once again, neytiri tried to fight against them. this time everyone in the family had to hold her back as the healer walked you away in a leaf big enough to cover your entire body from the eyes of those around you. once you were gone from her view, neytiri fell to the floor again, sobbing into the ground, 
"GREAT MOTHER, WHY?!!" their mother's screams felt like a knife in their hearts. the sully family felt nothing but guilt and grief upon your death. nobody got closure because there is no closure for this kind of thing. they were the reason you wanted to die, and now that you got what you wanted, they had to live with that guilt. 
you were high in being held in eywa's embrace as you cried. looking down on your family. you did not regret your decision, but you just had one question for your deity. 
"did they really love me, great mother." eywa heaved a sigh before answering you. 
"my ite, your mother and youngest sister loved you everyday, they were just very poor at showing it i'm afraid." you nodded your head, asking a follow-up question, 
"what about the others?" you knew by her face that you wouldn't like the answer, but it was too late. the question was asked. and the answer is precisely the reason why you did what you did.
"they loved you just a little bit too late, my child."
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star-girl69 · 8 months
Text
Your Girl
Clarisse La Rue x Fem!Demigod!Reader
—-
synopsis: late at night, you and clarisse get to know one another.
a/n: ykw i dont even know what i write anymore just enjoy it i truly just listen to the wind oh my god
Your Girl - Lana Del Rey (Unreleased)
warnings: im sorry im obsessed w the nightmare trope, friends to lovers MEYOW, HURT COMFORT, clarisse just wants to KISS, light tension, very light and fluffy tho…. not a lot of angst tbh, POSSESSIVE CLARISSE I SCREAMED, mutual pining YESSSSS, they’re in love but they don’t think the other could be in love w them, clarisse knows what she wants and sets out to get it, monsters- again it’s a drakon bc i’m evil, mentions of death, swearing, mentions of weapons, weed and smoking, substance abuse idk if it’s addiction my health teacher would be so disappointed, shotgunning weed, idk what’s happening honestly we’re all along for the ride, tell me if i missed anything!!
—-
You don’t know where Clarisse gets it from, but she has good weed.
They’re these perfectly little rolled blunts, with some sort of amazing concoction inside- you can’t even be bothered to care that it’s bad for you. Not when it makes you feel so good, not when it makes everything else fade away.
So, that’s why you’re here now. Sitting in the woods, leaning against a rock covered in moss, staring up at the stars. Sometimes you talk, sometimes you’re just here next to each other. But tonight, you think you took one too many hits, so you’re feeling a little sentimental.
“I would fucking die without you, Clarisse.”
She snorts. “Yeah, probably.”
“No, no, not just like- because you’re so strong, and stuff, but because of this fucking weed. I can’t sleep without it, y’know.”
She hums.
“And, like, you need sleep to live, or else your brain will like eat itself, or something ridiculous. Did you know that?”
She looks at you, mouth curved into an unimpressed smile, eyebrows raised. “I didn’t, and I care so much. Thanks for telling me, leech.”
“That’s mean,” you huff.
“Then stop leeching off of me and stealing my weed.”
Clarisse always looks so pretty in the moonlight. You would never admit that to anyone, but in the dark when your head is all hazy- you know she’s pretty. She’s beautiful, if you’re being honest, but she’s also your dealer- you can’t risk upsetting her. But still, sometimes you’re not sure how she isn’t a daughter of Aphrodite.
But you know better than anyone else that she gets everything from Ares, like she’s a carbon copy of him.
She gets her precision, her strength, her tactical mind, her rolling storm of emotions from him.
Except, there’s a softness in her. Only here, in the moonlight. You don’t know if it’s you or the weed, but you like to think it’s you. You like to think that Clarisse likes you as much as you like her, not just tolerates you for your mediocre company.
She’s sitting with one foot planted onto the ground, hair pulled back all messy, her arm balancing on her knee. The joint is held out conveniently towards you, lazily in between her fingers, so you flip yourself onto your stomach and reach out with open lips.
She smiles and flips the joint around, placing it onto your lips. Your close your eyes and your mouth, breathing in deeply. Gods, does it taste horrible, but you love it too much.
You pull back and breathe out the smoke.
“You love me, and my weed-stealing tendencies.”
“Uh, yeah, okay,” she rolls her eyes.
—-
Clarisse probably trains more than any other demigod at camp. Thirty minutes after dinner, like clockwork, you can find her heading to the field where all the sparring dummies live.
Clarisse is probably your only true friend at camp. You stick to yourself for the most part, hang out with your siblings, but besides for that it’s Clarisse. And she’s the same way. She hangs out with her siblings, and then you. Of course- everyone at Camp knows her name and her ruthless reputation.
You’re unknown, she’s known. She’s the best fighter you’ve ever seen, you’re mediocre, compared to her. She helps you at every turn, you’re the one getting helped by her. She’s mean to everyone, and you’re kind to whoever happens upon you.
You force each other to bring out the other sides of yourself no one gets to see. Clarisse gets to be soft, you get to be loud and annoying. You’re friends, but you both get something out of it.
She’s your friend, your dealer, your savior.
If the first day you came to camp, running through the woods with a drakon hot on your heels and your mouth split open into a scream- maybe Clarisse and her siblings wouldn’t have turned around and noticed the drakon.
Of course, Clarisse was the one who actually killed it, and she was the one who hoisted you up from where you had collapsed, breathing heavily. She was the one who actually made sure you weren’t hurt while your satyr protector panicked about having to face the Cloven Council.
She was the one who found you in the middle of the night, that drakon hissing in your ear, she was the one who gave you the claw she had pried from it’s dead body, she was the one who told you it was dead and nothing could hurt you in Camp.
“Clarisse!” you call, running towards her. Most campers like to wind down after dinner, so the field is empty.
“Leech,” she says when you reach her, leaning her spear against a dummy and stretching her arms above her head.
You always come everyday. You ask her the same question.
“Do you have it?”
She digs under her armor, pulling out the small cloth containing the blunt. “You would probably go insane if I didn’t.”
You feel calmer just looking at it. You smile sheepishly up at her.
“You know I can’t sleep without it, Clarisse.”
She looks away, stuffing it back under her armor, against her stomach.
“Maybe you should try and skip one night.”
You scoff. “I don’t feel like pulling an all-nighter, Clarisse.”
She nods, but her face is riddled with concern. “Okay, angel,” she mutters, so low you can barely hear it. But you do. You hear her call you angel, and you turn away instead of slamming your lips into hers.
—-
After that first night, you slept with that claw tight into your hand. And it was fine. You still had the occasional nightmare, but every demigod had those. But the older you got, the more monsters you learned about, the more comfortable you got with being a demigod- the more the nightmares came. Knowing the drakon was dead didn’t help, and the nightmares got worse and worse until Clarisse found you again one night.
You had drifted apart from her. She had her life and you had hers, but ever since you’ve been bonded by the nights.
She wrapped her arms around you and let you cry, mumbling about how she was the strongest demigod at camp, and there was the barrier, and nothing would ever get through to you.
She was soft in that moment. And you could tell she regretted it, because she ignored you for the next few days until one of her siblings pushed you to the ground. She appeared out of nowhere and grabbed his shirt, yelling that if he ever touched you again, she’d fucking kill him.
While he sputtered and asked why she cared about some stupid weak girl, she helped you up and said: “She’s my girl.”
And since that day 3 months ago, you’ve always been her girl. Neither of you really knew what that meant, except you liked being around each other and you liked this transaction. Clarisse liked owning something. You liked belonging to someone.
That’s what this entire friendship is about- convenience.
So, that’s why Clarisse being concerned about you makes you feel weird. You care about Clarisse, she cares about you- but only enough that she doesn’t want to see you hurt by someone else. But who is she to stop you when you’re the one hurting yourself?
You arrive at the rock in the forest, fingers twisting together. Clarisse is already there, lighter and blunt set out on the ground, polishing her spear.
“Hey,” she says, looking down.
“Hi.”
You sit down, eager to get your hands on the weed and forget about the way Clarisse’s concern confuses you.
You stare at your shaking hand.
Gods, are you really that nervous?
Clarisse’s eyes are sharp, she notices everything, she processes it much faster than you can ever dream to. It’s why she’s so quick in battle. She’s a well oiled machine and you’re the one job she’s assigned to do- she knows you by heart after all these nights.
Her spear is pushed off her lap. “Why are you shaking?” she says, voice low and raspy, her hand cupping yours.
“Low blood sugar,” you lie. “I’ll grab a snack before I go to bed.”
She says nothing, but you watch her hesitate as she grabs the blunt and the lighter from the ground, you watch her hesitate again as she goes to light it. But she lights it, she sticks it in between her fingers and holds it out to you.
“C’mere,” she mutters, and you lean forward and let her place the blunt on your parted lips. You breathe in, only for a few seconds, and you could go for a lot longer.
“I wasn’t done,” you huff as she takes her own drag.
“My weed,” she shrugs. “I decide how much you get.”
“You’re a bitch.”
She laughs. She laughs and it makes your stomach twist in such a good way you can’t feel like this anymore, you can’t remember what she does to you, what she called you.
You reach out blindly for the blunt, biting your lip as you practically climb on top of her.
“Clarisse!” you yell, but she seems to find your desperation hilarious, holding the blunt out as far as she can. “I fucking hate you, oh my Gods.”
“Okay, okay, fine,” she says, pushing you off of her. You realize you’re laying on your stomach in between her legs, one hand planted to the ground around her leg, the other reaching out.
She leans back and takes another drag. You roll your eyes and move to attack her, but she’s too fast, sitting up and holding your hand down, her other hand grabbing your chin. She breathes out the smoke right into your lips that are parted in shock, smiling as you stare right into her amused eyes.
She leans back while you sit there stupidly on top of her, blowing out the smoke. “That- that’s- I hate you, did I mention that?”
“You did,” she muses. “But we both know you’re lying.”
You look at her, at her wide smile, at the look in her eyes. You want nothing more than to be her girl- her girl in the way that she’ll kiss your head, tell you about all the things you’ll never do, she’ll lay down with you in a bed of soft pillows. Her girl in the way the reason she’s soft in the moonlight isn’t the weed, it’s because of you. Her girl in the way you can run to her, the way you do now, but with the added connotation of love.
You grab the joint, and she lets you, watching intently as you breathe in and blow out the smoke. She has no right to be worried over you. Not when you’re the one making the choice to waste away your youth. And especially when you’re not her girl- not in the way you want to be.
—-
“I was beginning to think you wouldn’t come,” she hums.
You sit back against the rock. Normally, you would have been here 20 minutes ago.
You didn’t catch her after dinner, and you stayed firmly in your bed until it all got to be too much. You’re terrified of sleeping, of the nightmares that will come- but for some reason, the weed just puts you at such ease that you don’t have any nightmares.
You didn’t want to be near Clarisse tonight. Not after yesterday, not after the way she’s been making you feel, and the fact that you know she could never really like you. Why would she? You are the stupid weak girl who gets pushed over. You run from drakon’s and can’t even sleep because of nightmares.
Clarisse is fiercely protective of those she loves, but you’re too much work.
You wanted to go one night. One night without the weed, and prove to her and yourself that you don’t need it. You’re not that weak.
But you couldn’t.
You sit down, she looks at your tense shoulders and doesn’t tease you, just hands you the blunt. You mumble something of a thank you, looking up at the stars, shoulders relaxing after a few more breaths.
“I, uh, I tried to skip. Tonight, I mean. I tried not to come.” It’s embarrassing to admit this. You’re so scared of the nightmares that even if it’s a placebo effect, you come back to this clearing every night.
“But you couldn’t?” she asks.
“I couldn’t,” you affirm, staring at the ground.
“Well, you can’t just go cold turkey, dummy. You have to wean yourself off of it. Do you not remember, like, any of those nicotine patch ads?” she laughs. “You’ve got a good memory, you remember.”
“Shut up, meanie,” you mumble, raising the joint to your lips. She stops you.
“Ah-ah. Starts now. Make it a good one, ‘cause that’s your last, baby.”
“Fine,” you mumble, ignoring the butterflies in your stomach. You breathe in for a long time, tempted to go a little longer, but Clarisse reaches over and pinches your cheek. “Okay!” you yell, throwing the joint back to her.
She laughs and raises it to her own lips, taking in another long drag before putting it out.
You look at her, silent question in the air. She shrugs.
“Been meaning to slow down for a while, why not do it together?”
“Yeah,” you hum, looking back towards the stars. “Oh, hey, Ares is out tonight.” She looks over.
“Yeah,” she muses. “Fuckin’ Ares.”
“It’s still beautiful,” you say, stars in your eyes. “You have to think about it the way mortals do. They don’t know the Gods put them up there- they think it’s just some random spotting of stars, they think they made patterns out of it. Isn’t that beautiful? To make patterns and people out of stars? To look for humanity where there is none?”
“I never thought about it like that,” Clarisse says.
“Aren’t they beautiful?” you ask. You can feel her eyes on you.
“Yeah,” she affirms. “Beautiful.”
—-
The next two weeks goes by the same. You don’t catch Clarisse after dinner, but you come every night, you smoke a little less, she teases you and gets closer to you. She gets bolder and bolder and you get shyer and shyer.
You still feel like too much. If she just lets you prove this to her and to yourself, the maybe you can lean against the rock with her and flirt back.
—-
You meet Clarisse by the rock. She’s still standing, waiting for you. She takes the last of the blunt you’ve been using for the last few days and lights it, taking one small drag before she flips it around and holds it out to you.
“C’mon,” she guides. “Not too much, I’ll stop you.”
You feel kind of like a baby as Clarisse puts the joint on her lips, fingertips against your face to steady her hand. You breathe in for just a second, tempted for more, but she takes it away. You look up at her, fingers twisted together.
“Clarisse, I don’t know if this is a good idea.”
She leaves the blunt to blow out in the wind in the natural dip of the rock, your own little ashtray at the top. Of course, Clarisse will come and collect it the next morning- you don’t want to upset the nymphs and satyrs in the forest.
“It’s a good idea,” she affirms. “Don’t worry, okay?”
You’re scared. You remember being chased by the drakon even now, you remember it’s snarls, you remember it’s claws moving through the air. You remember your heart pumping in your ears, you remember the stones in your stomach that were supposed to be fear.
You feel like Kronos, but what you swallowed wouldn’t just sit idly inside of you- no, your fear would rip through your stomach and your skin and burst out of you in an explosion of blood, like some sick joke of a firework.
She grabs your wrists. Clarisse is soft, here, in the moonlight.
“Hey, it’s okay. I-I was thinking, I didn’t know if you were gonna be okay, but why don’t you sleep in my cabin?”
You shift on your feet. “Clar, no, I can’t ask you to do that. What if we get caught? And I-I- it’s embarrassing, what if your siblings see? What if they tell everyone?”
Clarisse rolls her eyes and tugs you closer from where you had subconsciously started to drift away.
“They already think we’re dating, anyways. Besides, Y/N, no one cares. Most of my siblings have secrets anyways,” she smiles.
“Wh- we’re dating? They think- why?”
Her face is deadpan. “‘Cause you’re my girl.”
You pull back. “Clarisse.”
“What?” she says, slightly incredulous. “You are. You’re about the only person I can tolerate at this camp. I hope you know that. I know I can be horrible, but really, I… care about you a lot.”
You look in her eyes. There’s no lies, no insincerity.
“I know, Clarisse. And I… I appreciate it so much. You’re, like, my only friend,” you smile.
She smiles back but it’s tight. “Friend, yeah.”
You put your arms around her neck and hug her. It’s the first time you’ve ever really hugged her, and her arms wrap tight around your waist. Her mouth presses against your hair. You let yourself be her girl in this moment.
Clarisse is your best friend. She cares about you. Of course she helps you with this. She’s your best friend. Of course you let her.
—-
You do follow Clarisse back to the Ares cabin, back to her bed- and she points to one of her siblings you can’t see in the dark, but there are two figures in the bed. She smiles and you stifle a laugh.
You know better than anyone else that big bad Ares kids are like a marshmallow on the inside. They act all tough, and they are pretty tough, but there’s a soft spot inside of them only unlocked by one person with the right key.
You notice her sibling has their arm around the other person. You wonder if Clarisse will wrap her arm around you like that too.
Clarisse climbs into her bed, opening the covers for you. The beds at Camp are twin sized, but you can fit two people on them if you’re close together. You don’t hesitate, not anymore, not when you have one chance to pretend you’re really hers.
You lay on your side, facing her, hands tucked up by your chest. Her eyes meet yours, she brushes her curls out of her face.
“Good?” she asks. You nod, breathing out.
“‘M fine,” you say.
She rubs your arm, cold from the dark night. “Just relax, okay? Just close your eyes, Y/N.”
You do, you close your eyes, but you’re so fucking terrified you can’t.
“Clarisse,” you breathe, a plead. For what, you don’t know. You want a million things from her in this moment. It’s not fair of you to ask her, you know this, but it doesn’t stop you from asking.
Your breath comes fast, your nails dig into your palms, but you keep your eyes screwed shut like sleep will just magically hit you like a train.
“It’s okay,” Clarisse says, firm. “Why are you so scared?” she whispers.
“They’re so real,” you whisper, your voice breaking.
“They’re not.”
She wraps her arms around you so tight you feel like she’s crushing you. But it keeps you in the moment. If you focus on the way her skin feels against yours, on the way her thumb brushes your shoulder blade, her fingertips scratching the back of your scalp.
If you focus, if you imagine all the thing you and her will never do, if you imagine being her girl, then you can fall asleep.
You dream of her lips pressing against your head, her voice in your ear, calling you her angel.
—-
You wake up, Clarisse still wrapped around you, and slowly detangle yourself. Drool pools at the corner of her lips, and you have to bite back a giggle as you slip out of the blankets and into the warm riding sun.
She looks just as pretty in the sunlight as she does in the moonlight. You feel like a lover slipping out of a bed of secrets. But you’re not. You’re just a friend slipping out of a bed of rumors.
She looks so peaceful, you can’t help but wonder if she always sleeps like this- or if having you next to her had the same effect on her sleep as it did to yours.
—-
There’s a loud knock at your cabin door.
There’s only you and a few of your siblings in here, putting the final touches on their outfits for the day, grabbing the last items they need. One of your younger siblings open the door, and you look around the pillars- maybe it’s a counselor doing some sort of inspection? You take a glance around your bunk- but it’s all clean.
Your eyes meet hers.
“Out,” she says, roughly. She looks at you so intently you almost wonder if she’s talking to you. But when you siblings stand there in shock, she looks away. “Well? I said get out, dummies.”
They exchange looks with you, but eventually shuffle out, not wanting to risk Clarisse and her wrath.
She shuts the door behind your last sibling.
“Being tough has it perks, huh?” she smiles, leaning against the door. Your shirt isn’t even pulled on properly, one of your bra straps is already falling down your shoulder from the act of putting your shirt on, and you’re staring at her with your mouth wide open.
She looks you up and down.
“C-Clarisse, what-?”
She walks over to you, frown etched onto her face.
“I woke up and you weren’t there.”
“Oh,” you say. “I… I thought you would have wanted me gone-”
“Don’t care. If you’re going to sleep with me then you need to wake me up and tell me you’re leaving.”
She rolls her eyes at your confusion. She sits on your bed and then gestures animatedly for you to sit down.
“Did you not sleep well?” she fusses. “What’s up with you this morning?”
“I slept great, Clarisse, it’s just- why are you here?”
“To tell you that you can’t leave,” she deadpans. “I mean, you spend all night shaking in my arms, terrified, and then I wake up and you’re not there? I almost killed someone. You’re lucky I decided to check here first, Y/N.”
She laughs. She laughs like it’s so funny.
“Why?” you ask.
“‘Cause you’re my girl,” she shrugs. “And-”
“Clarisse, what does that mean?”
You know what you want. And you’re not dumb, but you’re the only friend Clarisse really has- what did you have to compare it to? You’ve been thinking about it in your head, rolling it around like a diamond- each side reflects something you want from her. Her love, her protection, her touch, her time, her.
She plays with her fingers. “It means… I like touching you. I like protecting you. I like being near you. I like your voice and your face.”
She stares at you blankly, like she’s recounting a grocery list, waiting for an affirmative “yes, I heard you.” But all you can do is stare in shock, trying to make your brain catch up with your heart- Clarisse likes your face. Clarisse feels the same way you do. You can be her girl, and you’re not too much for her, you’re not just friends.
“Oh, fuck it,” she mumbles. She places her hand on your face and pecks your lips. “That’s what it means, okay? I’m, like, embarrassingly in love with you, if you haven’t noticed.”
Clarisse is so blunt and forward it makes your head spin.
She stares into your eyes, searching them for something other than shock and confusion.
“Okay,” she says. Shuffling back. You can tell she’s hurt and embarrassed, but her face reveals nothing other than faux confidence and indifference. “I’ll go, I guess-”
“Bitch,” you mumble, slamming your lips onto hers.
It feels so overwhelmingly right and fills you with such a calmness that weed could never compare to. If you were dependent on the joints, then one taste and you’re addicted to Clarisse. She kisses you back with just as much ferocity, throwing your arms around her neck, trying to swallow you whole with her mouth as she grabs your neck with one hand, your face with the other.
It’s months of tension and wanting, lips touching through the passing of a joint, all of it coming down to this moment that feels so bad, so sinful- surely the Gods must frown upon loving someone this much. You would never pray to any of them again if it meant Clarisse would keep kissing you like this.
When she finally pulls back, you’re both smiling wide, leaning into her palm, hands playing with the curls at the base of her neck. You feel like a giddy school girl. You feel like a lover discovering something wildly new and unknown, promising to keep it secret, sealing it with a kiss of pure fire.
“That was such a mean way to confess to someone,” you say. “Just bitchy. Brass and blunt- harsh, even.”
“Shut up,” she mumbles, pressing her face against yours.
“Yeah, it’s okay. I know you’re a big softie who drools in her sleep.” She pulls away and glares at you.
“I don’t fucking drool, Y/N. You’re seeing things.”
You fake frown, bringing her closer to you. “Such a horrible thing to say to your girlfriend.”
“My girlfriend?” she breathes, swollen lips parting like she’s aching to kiss you again.
“Your girlfriend,” you affirm, staring straight into her eyes.
You sunk more into becoming a demigod and all it got you was nightmares and a fear of sleeping. But the more you sunk into being her girl, the more you sunk into loving her and being loved.
You don’t know where Clarisse gets her softness from. Certainly not from her father. She didn’t learn to kiss your head from him. She didn’t learn how to hold you, how to call you hers, how to whisper in your ear from Ares.
You don’t know where Clarisse gets her softness from, but it’s good.
—-
SHOUTOUT TO clarisse “cause you’re my girl” la rue LOVE YOUR POSSESSIVE ASS!!!!!!!!
—-
clarisse when y/n smokes weed: oh so pretty……
clarisse when y/n can only fall asleep bc of her arms or her weed: my girl fr……..
clarisse when y/n: oh my wonderful perfect angel
—-
y/n: BITCH
clarisse: YOURE SO HOT FUCK
—-
where did clarisse get her weed from you may ask? me that’s where she got it from i ripped through the fabric of reality to give it to her to make this happen actually and you’re welcome
—-
taglist:
@lvrue @t-wylia @laughingcheese037 @kroumi @urdeadpoet @colezb @rey26 @harmzilla @elliewilliamsbae @amberfreemansburntface @kyuupidwrites @neverwaakeme-up @shark1008 @liballer @heyimadison @nvirskies @pnsteblnme @mar2ss @restellsss @ravisinghs-wife @marsconer @evangelinexo @randomhoex @luvrrish
@sincerely-silk
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sugarplumz100 · 7 days
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I’m thinking about father!Aizawa who actually doesn’t mind that your dating Kirishima
He obviously knew the red headed boy had a thing for you when the boys eyes would always be on you, he’d always eagerly volunteer to partner up with you for assignments or training, the way he’d accidentally forget to erase the heart with Eijiro + Y/n written inside.
Aizawa doesn’t have anything against him, he’s got good moral, he’s respectable, he tries his best, and doesn’t seem like a bad influence…he doesn’t like that his little girl is growing up and going off and attracting attention
But Kirishimas attention…he doesn’t mind too much. He does give him some extra shit tho. That’s his job as a father, he’s got to protect his little girl from these rabid boys
Aizawa does get sad pissed when he sees you two kissing, in the empty halls, behind his back. He doesn’t go up and confront you but he does get upset that you never told him anything about you dating. He also can’t blow his cover, only a few people know about him being your father.
Sooo what other choice does he have then to keep an extra close and stern eye on the both of you. Even though it’s a bit more difficult with the dorm systems and him only seeing you both a few times a day.
Father!Aizawa who does assigned ground members and partners when giving assignments. Aizawa who tries to keep you both far away from each other when training especially in your guys hero costumes. He doesn’t like seeing you both play wrestling once one of you guys wins, or flirting, or that…lingering gaze ewww
He only does this because he cares about you, and he’s slightly upset that you never spoke to him about any of this. What will you do next? Get married without telling him?! Okay maybe that’s an overreaction and maybe Yamada was right when he said to chill out and that your a growing girl with her own autonomy and right to like who you like and pursue.
Aizawa only calms down a little until he see the way Kirishima looks at you, just full of love and admiration. How happy he sees that boy makes you even though you try to hide it because you know your father is watching. How much you both have grown and learned from each other. He can’t stay mad when you final come to him about wanting to introduce your boyfriend.
Thinking about boyfriend!Kirishima who freaks out when he finally meets your father and it’s…Aizawa
Kirishima who gets nervous that Aizawa will be out to get him now that Aizawa knows that he’s dating his daughter
But he still tries to make his best impression even though they already know each other but they don’t know each other in this sense
Kirishima feels relieved once Aizawa finally gives his approval (even if he didn’t kiri would never leave you, he loves you)
Father!Aizawa who 5 years into the future is so happy to walk his precious girl down the aisle. Maybe Kirishima wasn’t a bad pick for you. He wouldn’t want anyone else for his baby.
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If you would like to see more of my work, check out my masterlist I have so pretty big things in the works rn!
MASTERLIST
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judes-hoe · 7 months
Text
Bad Call ~ JB5
Parrings ~ Jude Bellingham x reader
Summary ~ when Jude comes home from the game you let him do whatever he wants to let that anger out
Warnings ~ pure filth
A/N ~ we got fucking robbed tf was the ref thinking I don’t think he knows how to do his job. Sorry this is so bad I tried my best also lemme tag @mentalbaddiex cause I told her I’d make one so I’ll tag her😙
~~~~~~~~~~~
You were happy to see Jude back playing on the pitch, you would have gone to the game but you had to stay home and take care of your new German Shepard puppy. You watched the whole game sitting on the couch with Hunter. When you saw the ref blow the whistle while the ball was mid air you were also furious. You got even more mad when they gave Jude a red card.
You could tell how mad Jude was. You knew when he came home that you’d let him do what he needed to calm down. You took Hunter out to go to the bathroom before going upstairs to sleep knowing Jude won’t be home till tomorrow afternoon. You go up to your room and put Hunter in his cage since he’s just a puppy. Then you get settled in bed laying down and scrolling on your phone, liking everything about what happened at the end of the game.
~~~~
You woke up and got Hunter out his cage before going to the kitchen. You filled his food bowl and made yourself some breakfast. You sat down on the couch eating your breakfast, watching your favorite show. Jude texted you saying he was on his way home so you figured vini was giving him a ride home like he does sometimes.
Around 20 minutes later you hear the door open and slam shut and Hunter barking. “Babyy” Jude called out. “In the living room” you shouted. You watched as he turned the corner and walked over to you, laying on top of you. You start rubbing his back and scratching the back of his head. “I know you’re still angry, I’ll let you take it out on me,” you whispered in his ear. His head shot up and a smirk was displayed on his face.
He got up and picked you up walking to the bedroom. He laid you on the bed and started kissing you roughly. “God im so mad” he said between kisses. “I know baby just take it all out on me,” you said back. He took all your clothes off only leaving your panties on, he took all his off too expect for his boxers. He started kissing down your body until he got to your pussy, he quickly takes off your panties and starts eating you out like it’s his last meal.
He made you cum 2 times with his mouth before he finally came up and kissed you awhile taking his boxers off. He took his cock and lined it up with your entrance before slamming in. He started going as fast and as hard as he could letting his anger out. You in the other hand, your eyes were in the back on your head, you were moan so loud you thought the neighbors would think you’re getting murdered. He leaned down and started kissing you and leaving marks on your neck. You were clawing at his back it probably looked like a cat attacked him.
He had put you in ever position you can think of doggy, cowgirl, anything. You had came about 4 times before the overstimulation got to much and you had to use the safe word. He came about 3 times, but he ran a nice warm bath for you both and after that you both got into bed and he let you baby him a little even tho he just fucked the shit outta you.
Let’s just say you couldn’t really walk for 2 days and Jude had to take care of you.
~~~~~~~~
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Text
— smoke some, drink some, pop one
pairing: vada cavell x fem!reader
warnings: smut, drug use, lesbian sex, cunnilingus, overstimulation, slight roughness, unnecessary euphoria references
summary: you smoke dope. vada admits she has never eaten a girl out before. a practical demonstration ensues
word count: 2.7k
a/n: this was written under the influence of a travis scott song. expect anything. enjoy
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You stare at the clock hanging above the blackboard anxiously, kicking your leg under the desk. The last few minutes of the last period always seem to stretch miles into infinity, and your patience is barely as flexible. The voice of the teacher has long since become background noise, the talk of equations and trigonometry and the finals week and how unprepared you were for it the last thing on your mind.
You pick your phone up for the millionth time to look at the messages still hanging and marked as unseen on your screen, eyes focusing on Vada’s name followed by an emoji of a puppy and a black heart.
‘got us enough to roll one’
‘just one tho’
‘don’t wanna end up like last time’
You chuckle quietly – the sweet memories of you and Vada skinny dipping in a pond at night and then showing up half-naked at Nick’s door are definitely the ones you treasure most, even though you can barely piece them together.
You look out the window, lost in thought. Your teacher asks you a question – and then you're saved by the sound of the bell ringing across the building.
As soon as you hear it you’re up and all but bolting out the door, muttering a quick ‘bye’ to the teacher to maintain your good girl image that, to be honest, has been hanging by a thread ever since the day you started dating Vada.
Not that you really care about their opinion. You just don’t want the principal to call your mother again.
You speed walk through the corridor, try to remember which floor was Vada’s class on, before you’re stopped by a pair of hands wrapping around your waist.
“Hey there pretty girl.”
You squeal in surprise, turning around in your girlfriend’s arms. She’s grinning at you annoyingly, the little shit, but the small dimple on her right cheek makes it impossible to be mad at her.
“Fuck, Vada,” you huff, pinching her shoulder half-heartedly, “I’ve got a weak heart, remember?
She shrugs, leans in to kiss your pout away.
“Sorry. I got out early. Wanted to wait for you since apparently someone's not interested in answering any of my texts anymore.”
You kiss her back, smiling apologetically, “I was too excited to see you, I guess.”
The brunette hums, lacing her fingers with yours, “Where to then?”
You think about inviting her over to your place – it’s closer to school, and your mom is working till late evening, but the rationality clicks quicker. Your mom also happens to work as the district attorney of the town – you’re pretty damn sure she knows what pot smells like, and would be able to smell it hours after you and Vada have fucked beyond the common sense of ventilating the house.
So you do the next best thing, one that won’t get either of you in trouble – you hotbox in your girlfriend’s car. You realize it might soon become the best thing, because it hits so much better.
Vada gets greedy with the joint a few times – you have to remind her it’s puff puff pass, not puff puff kiss your girlfriend so she lets her guard down then puff again.
In a few minutes you’re in her lap and making out with her like it’s your last day on Earth, the two of you giggling into each other’s mouths when you accidentally press the horn with your butt a few times, the honking sound mixing with your laughter.
You can barely make Vada’s face out by the time the last of the joint fizzles out and starts to burn your fingertips, the smoke filling the car up to the brim, but her eyes stand out amidst the choking whiteness, her pupils almost heart-shaped as she watches you with a dopey grin.
When you open the door the smoke drifts up the sky in big clouds, and breathing clear oxygen almost feels weird.
You’re still giggling slightly as Vada fumbles with her pockets to find her keys, your soft lips pressing to the side of her neck in sweet pecks making the process of finding them unnecessarily hard.
She shushes you when you finally step inside, listening for any sounds, before closing the door behind you. As soon as you realize you’re alone in the house, you press your lips against Vada’s impatiently.
“Don’t forget– your shoes,” Vada manages between the kisses, shivering as you slide your hands under her oversized shirt, “I’m serious, you horndog. Mom hates it when the floors are dirty.”
You groan into her lips, pulling away to untie your Jordans, shaking on your unstable legs slightly, and make your way up the stairs into her room. Vada opens the window to let the fresh spring air sweep through the room, hoping it’ll be enough to help the smell of weed wear off your clothes and hair.
“Wanna watch a show?” She asks, gesturing to her laptop as you sit on her bed, crossing your legs.
“Mhm. You’re thinking Euphoria, aren’t you?” You snort, watching as your girlfriend slides next to you, “Because I think we’re pretty much in one.”
“So, like,” Vada trails off, her hands coming to rest on your hips in what she thinks is a subtle movement, “Would that make me Rue, then?”
She plays with a string on your pants, feeling almost embarassed about the corny things she's saying.
“And you – Jules?”
You hum, tilting your head with a coy grin, try and mull her innuendo over in your baked out mind. The comparison does seem familiar – especially with Vada’s puppy love towards you.
“Well, I liked their duo in the first season but... weren’t they, like... extremely toxic later on?”
Vada finally pulls in you to sit on her lap, your thighs bracketing hers, and it’s such close proximity you can count all the pretty freckles scattered across her face. You’d probably get lost at fifty, way too high for mathematics of any kind, even if it’s this romantic.
“You’re right. Fuck Euphoria,” she whispers, her gaze sliding to your lips, and you don’t waste any more time to press your lips to hers.
Kissing Vada has always been something to look forward to – warm and pleasant, makes your stomach flip when she’d bite your bottom lip and lick at your teeth. Kissing Vada whilst being slightly high is an out of this world feeling. Her nose presses into your cheek, and your palms slide to the back of her neck, fingers twirling her silky brown tresses idly.
You pull away for air, and it gets stuck in your throat as the brunette presses a kiss behind your ear, trailing the butterfly smooches down to your pulse point. Her hands are kept busy under your shirt, fingertips tracing up your stomach to your ribs.
“How many times have you ever been eaten out?”
A sudden but... not at all unwelcome question. You lean back on your hands, humming when her plush lips rest against your collarbone, and purse your lips in thought.
“Mm... once or twice. I don’t really keep any notches on my belt, y’know?”
Her hands tighten around your hips, and you chuckle.
“Drinking vinegar, are you now? Don’t worry. You have an opportunity to top them all.”
Vada averts her gaze suddenly. You frown, lean in to cup her face gently.
“What’s wrong?”
The brunette rubs her thumbs over your clothed thighs, then looks back up at you, a small frown on her face.
“I’ve never done this before.”
“You’ve never... fucked anyone?” You're sure that's a lie – she's fucked you before.
“I’ve never given a girl head.”
You hum, reaching to hold her slightly shaky hands, slowly inching them closer to the waistband of your sweatpants, “I can teach you,” you suggest, biting your lip, “Show you what I like. That cool?”
Vada looks almost mesmerized. She nods, her gaze fixed on your pants, and you giggle as she tugs them down your legs, prompting you to slide off her lap to let her do so, the cool outside breeze hitting your warm skin and rising goosebumps in its wake.
“I listened to a podcast the other day,” she begins, “About cunnilingus. The host said the best advice she’s ever gotten was to google wielding techniques.”
You raise your eyebrows in confusion, “Huh?”
Vada reaches for her phone on the bedside table, quickly unlocking it and typing something in the search bar. She selects a random picture and shows you the screen.
There are indeed blueprints of what looks like wielding seams, going from bottom to the top. The arrows are forming different patterns – there are zig-zags, crescents, a circular seam and a ‘figure 8’ seam...
For all the ridiculousness, they do seem... practical.
You smile and grab the phone, turning it off and tossing it somewhere back on the bed.
Of course she would do that – research stuff. It’s so fucking endearing it prompts you to wrap your hands around her neck and press a kiss to her cheek.
“Why not stick to the usual alphabet thing, hm?” You offer, “I can tell which letter I’d love the most.”
You lean in to whisper into her ear huskily, “It’s ‘V’.”
Vada shudders, making you smile. Then her hands grasp at your hips, tugging you closer, and your breath hitches at her sudden assertiveness.
The brunette bends her knees so that she’s level with your center and parts your legs slowly. You curse under your breath – you’re pretty much drenched right through your panties, and if Vada was just slightly more sober, she’d probably tease you about it, too. You’re glad she isn’t.
She leans in closer instead, tongue lolling out and pressing against your clothed cunt, licking a stripe up the smeared wetness there. Her fingers slip under the waistband of your underwear, and you tilt your hips up a bit to help her take it off, the movement causing your heat to press further into her mouth, making you whine.
Your panties are off, and so is Vada’s tongue.
She stares long enough for you to feel a bit conscious about yourself, and you move to close your legs on instinct, but her hands keep them apart. She hooks your ankles over her shoulders, shoots you a warning look. Her dark gaze makes you clench around nothing. The shyness and uncertainty is gone like it wasn’t even there.
You’re not sure if it’s weed, or if you’re being tricked, but this version of Vada is... new. Extremely hot, too.
She lowers herself so that she’s inches away from your pussy, her warm breath fanning your swollen clit – you're so strung up that you’re starting to feel a second heartbeat in between your legs. Vada looks up at you again, making sure you’re watching her as she flattens her tongue along your slit, collecting all the warm slick that leaked out from the moment she had you on her lap. She lets out a satisfied groan, and you sigh, hips buckling to meet her.
Despite all your confidence, you feel yourself crumble at the first touch of your girlfriend’s mouth on you – you’ve always preferred this over any kind of penetration, and Vada’s eagerness to please you doesn’t help.
She withdraws for a moment, and you find yourself missing her immediately.
“Is this okay?” She asks, palms caressing your thighs to soothe you.
“Don’t make me beg.” You breathe with a chuckle.
She laps at your folds, groaning at the saccharine warmth of your arousal coating her tongue – then leans back again, and you’re almost whining before she reaches her thumb to rub at your swollen clit, her breathing heavy as she watches you gush around nothing.
“Baby.” You whine pathetically, your knees coming together to try and push her face into you.
Vada doesn’t seem to be bothered in the slightest, her digit circling your sensitive spot, never taking her eyes away, “Hm?”
“Please,” you murmur, voice stifled by the hot arousal burning in your veins, “Want your mouth, baby. Want to cum on your tongue, please.”
The brunette digs her fingers into the soft flesh of your hips before wrapping her plump lips around your clit, gently sucking, and your thighs tighten around her head at the sudden overwhelmingly good feeling coursing through your body. You almost can’t believe how good it feels – how good Vada is, almost naturally talented at making your toes curl as she mouths at your dripping pussy, keeping a burning grip on your quivering legs. The immense amount of pleasure is so sudden you’re practically sobbing her name, your stomach tensing and hips bucking with each calculated flick of the girl’s tongue. The sheets under you are considerably darker than the rest, a pool of your cum along with the brunette’s spit dampening the area.
You’ve heard that drugs can expand your consciousness, but to such a degree that has you seeing stars as Vada eats you out like it’s her second nature...
Her tongue slips between your walls suddenly, causing you to arch your back into the air, hips rolling into her face. Her tongue continues to lap confidently, going in circles around your entrance. A shaky sigh leaves your lungs, and you have to clench your eyes shut.
“Vada, oh my god,” you breathe shakily, your voice tight and high, feeling you stomach coil, “I'm gonna cum– Fuck, fuck, Vada."
Her lips find your clit again, and that’s what sends you over the edge, your thighs clasping around her head so tight she swears her ears start to ring.
You shiver as the brunette drinks you up hungrily, your legs easing their hold on her, chest heaving with shuddering gasps.
“Oh, Vada. Fuck,” you mutter, resting your forearm over your eyes as you try to calm your speeding heart, “That was so... so good, baby. I think you lied to me. Either that, or you’re... a natural.” You chuckle breathlessly, raising a shaky hand to swipe some stray hairs from your forehead.
Your legs move to unhook themselves from the girl’s shoulders, taking pity on her most likely strained muscles, but Vada’s grip turns bruising on your legs. You’re pushed back further into the pillows suddenly, and before you can let out a single peep in alarm, she’s on you again.
Her hands reach to grasp under your knees, bending your legs up, your pussy spread open for her. She doesn’t relent — her hands hold your thighs as she all but buries her face in your heat, the movements of her tongue harsh. Fast. Merciless.
The sudden aggressiveness makes you let out a broken moan, your hands darting to tread through Vada’s hair, wanting her closer but away at the same time, the painful pleasure too much for your scrambled mush of a brain to handle.
“Oh my god, Vada!”
She leans away for a moment to trace two separate stripes from your entrance up to your clit with the tip of her tongue, and you whine, your foggy mind realizing that she has actually just done the letter thing, before she’s back on you like a hungry beast, jaw hanging open to wrap her mouth around your seizing cunt with an obscene slurping sound.
Your back arches as you cum harder than before, throwing your head back against bed and squeezing your eyes shut, your girlfriend’s name tumbling out of your mouth in an almost pornographic moan. You whine as Vada laps at your center with purpose, licking you clean, before pulling away mercifully.
There’s a cocky wolfish grin on the brunette’s face as she watches you open your eyes slowly, trying to compose yourself.
“How was that for a notch on your belt, hm?”
Shit. If you didn’t just experience the most intense orgasm in your life, you’d scoff at the smugness of her tone.
“I’m gonna be honest... I wasn’t sure I’d be into... that,” you say shakily, “But I guess I am now. Jesus Christ, Vada.”
“Just Vada is fine.” She gently caresses your hips, leans down to kiss your jaw lovingly, “Now...”
Her fingers lift the hem of your shirt up to your chest, blunt nails grazing the flesh under your breasts – she watches them rise and fall with your unsteady breaths.
“How about I salt the earth behind me so that no one ever stands a chance of owning you the way I do?”
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