#i still dont have a name but I live the idea of Matt making a big deceleration of love only for Elektra to go “no.”

[hiitspath]

I want to write a fic where Matt gets rejected by both Peter and Elektra, after he declares his love for Elektra. The problem is Elektra is such a hard character to grasp for me cause I haven't read much about her. Are there any recommended readings I should do to get a better understanding of her character?

[thecynthh]

end game - M.S

synopsis - through matt and y/n’s life both of them never thought they would be hooking up, but what happens when everyone finds out about them and it blows up in their face.

2.6k words

notes - IM NOT HATING ON MADI I JUST NEEDED SOMEONE TO USE FOR STORY PURPOSES. (im her biggest fan dont cancel me)

(synopsis for a new series that i’m working on is featured)

this is for @annamcdonalds67 contest!! i saw the post and saw how many taylor swift songs were there and this was one of my favourite ones out there and i got insanely inspired. please share some love to anna as well bc she deserves it for organizing this !

warnings - smut->angst, small matt sub, riding, oral (fem receiving), childhood best friends to fwb to lovers, badboy!matt x goodgirl!reader

for lacysturniolo and her amazing work and dedication to her fans, i’ll look up to you, forever and always

-

matt barely made it through the door before his arms were strangling me in a death inducing kiss. in my whole 17, almost 18, years of life i never expected in my life did i think my childhood best friend would be the one crushing me with his lips. we���ve both dated around but through it all we ended up here.

“fuck, matt” the breathy name escapes from my mouth feeling him move down to my neck leaving stinging hickeys with his talented mouth. “god im glad your parents aren’t here, don’t think my good kid image would keep up if they heard you.”

“you’re so inappropriate matt” my eyes roll listening to him rub in how much my parents love matt. “come on, i don’t like the idea of you fucking me on any other surface than in my room especially in my parents house.”

“whatever you say princess,” the small smirk he’s always had since he was 12 still looms over me as i lead him towards the grand staircase. he followed very close behind me keeping his arms and mouth on my neck.

it doesn’t take long till he’s holding my arms above my head with his fingers intertwined with mine. “matt, fuck, please can you just fuck me now.”

“you don’t get to be impatient, you called.”

“and you came.”

“you are about to as well.” i wanted to wipe that smirk clean off his face if his body didn’t feel so right pressed up against mine.

we haven’t told anyone about us yet, not even nick or chris. we both knew it would only make things worse, and i was alright with keeping it a secret. i’ve spent enough of my closeted and innocent. I'm a teenager, teens are supposed to do this type of thing. teens may hook up but maybe not with their childhood best friends

his mouth trailed down from my neck, to my sternum, all the down to between my thighs before he yanked my legs down to come closer to the edge of the bed.

3RD PERSON POV

matt’s hands never seem to have left y/n's body, exploring every last inch of her body. her arms, legs and heart were his. matt spends no time wasted connecting his lips to her clothed heat, within seconds she’s shimming her pants and underwear off.

there was a small knock on the door with an awaiting friend, madi was there to meet up with y/n to pick up the homework she had missed that day. without an answer from the door, madi looks around the house through windows and cracks in the blinds.

only seeing a light shown through from the living room, she wanders off to the balcony and fire escape on the side of the house. it was only a flight of stairs and a half till madi was on par with the balcony, it was a short climb till she was onto the balcony. the only thing blocking madi and the couple was a transparent creme coloured cloth with embroidered rose accents.

y/n’s loud moans escaped flooding her bedroom, escaped through the window. the curtains sway giving madi an opening to see matt fully down on her friend and her enjoying it. madi’s mouth gapes open as ashe slides her phone out of her pocket.

the camera app opens quickly as she swipes to record.

the small blip of her phone pipes up as she capturns the full scene on camera, the summer sunset gave a yellow glow to the recording. matt rips off his shirt with one arm dipping right back to y/n’s core.

madi’s only thought was to share it to her best friend, nick. little did she know nick wasn’t the only one she sent it to, but her homework group. madi continued to record through the small slit of the window.

science 4 group

madi 🩷

* view one attachment *

HOLY SHIT LOOK MATT AT Y/N’S HOUSE!!!!

Y/N’S POV

“matt, matt, matt” the release came to me in an instant. “come on baby girl, you did so well. you ready?” the sound of his belt come undone only made me hotter. before another word could be exchanged i grab his shoulder pulling him down to the bed rolling on top of him.

“i’ll ride you till your dick is limp and your begging me to stop.” matt’s reaction only made me feel even more aroused. “anything for you baby,” matt said copying my tone of voice.

stationing my legs on either side of his i bend down to kiss him, pressing my pebbled nipples onto his bare skin, slowly grinding down onto his raging hard on.

his whines only intensify the burning seer of his skin touching mine. my hand follows in suit with my hips feeling every last vein of his dick through his boxers. “a-ah!” matt whines due to me pressing my finger into his slit.

pushing his boxers down his dick springs out slapping against his happy trail. “please please please y/n please.”

“please what, pretty boy?” i mock feeling the surge of power flow through me.

“please fuck me,” he whimpered out. for such a bad boy exterior, he sure doesn’t act like it now.

without waiting another second for him to say something else i sink down onto his throbbing dick feeling him fill me up so well. “mhhm, matty you feel so good.”

“ugh, only for you b-baby.” matt’s barely keeping it together, while i bounce up and down on his cock. speeding up every second. i begin to grind onto his pelvis as i slam down onto him with his body slightly grazing my clit in the best way possible.

“matty, im a-about to c-cum. do it with me.” his hands sneak onto my love handles as i lean up against him again, he attaches his mouth to my nipple that was dangling in front of him. his hips snap up and down, pushing insanely deep inside me. “m-matt!” a loud pornographic moan comes out of my mouth feeling the knot in my stomach break, feeling a huge relief. he follows soon after letting out a guttural grunt.

i roll down beside him, both of our deep breaths fill the room. “fuck, oh my god.” i breathed out, heaving my chest. i turn to face him, putting my hand against his chest and my head onto the arm that was stretched out near me. my curtains move and sway with the blow of my fan as i see a shadow fall off of my window, it must've just been an animal.

“i don’t think i can walk,” i confess feeling him look over to me. my hand travels to feel his scruff that he’s been growing out the past few weeks, it’s never gotten that long but it’s still very apparent. “hmm, lemme take care of you okay? we can even get mcdonald’s, im fine driving out to the further one if you're scared of people to see us.” he combs his hand through my hair, tugging a little relieving some heat and pressure my head has collected.

he pushes himself up and goes to the bathroom, turning on the shower and coming back to retrieve me.

-

this whole day it felt like people were staring at me left and right, i haven’t even been in the building for more than 20 minutes and i’ve had three people quickly lose eye contact with me when they were the one staring first.

i haven’t matt yet but i was really hoping we would be able to meet up at our usual spot, im snapped out of my trances feeling someone's hand on my shoulder squeezing it a little. i jump a little whipping my head towards the rest of the hands body, thank goodness it’s just nick. “babes, we gotta talk.” he said in a monotone voice, “why what’s up?”

“just give me a second, stop moving.” i listen to him and stop in my tracks seeing nothing wrong with today but the staring. “okay now what happened last night,” nick said now holding me down with both hands.

“well if you must know, my parents are out of town, like you knew and i stayed home studying before going out for mcdonald’s.” the lie slipped out from my mouth with ease hoping to keep matt and my secret a secret for a little longer.

“okay then maybe it isnt that serious…” nick trailed off, his shoulders were very visibly tense, not letting off since he caught up to me. “what are you talking about? but come on lemme at least go to my locker.” he reluctantly let’s go knowing i’m stronger than him.

“y/n wait– just know i have no clue if its true or if it's even you.” he says following in suit with me. “nick, still no clue what you are talking about.” my locker lock clicks a few times before i'm able to get it open.

a large barrage of papers fall out of my locker all having the same image pasted on them. my mouth drops open as i turn my head to nick. he picks one up from the top of my locker, unfolding it and making a sour face to it. “what? what is it?”

he slowly hands it to me, folding it back up before i get ahold of it.

my heart dropped.

it was a grainy picture of me riding matt last night, his hands on my hips and my face looking at him with pure lust. it was taken through my window and luckily you couldn’t see much of matt’s face and next to none of mine. but people knew, everyone knew it was me.

picking up a few other copies, some of them have the words slut and whore written on them in large words. if they printed a picture it must’ve been everywhere online, i cannot stand being here another minute.

stuffing a couple copies into my bag i storm out of the building feeling tears stinging my eyes, y/n how could you let this happen? what’s going to happen when harvard finds out about this? there goes your life, your friends, your boyfriend and your future. quadruple kill.

i sit in my car and just drive, drive to the only place that’ll bring me any kind of peace at this time. it was only a 3 minute drive from the school to the large forest that surrounded the school. i parked my car on the slightly wet gravel, hearing the crunch of the rocks beneath the tires.

i walked and walked till the trees seemed to clear a bit, the grass was wet and squished under my shoes. brunette hair peaks from behind a tree, it was like the picture was being painted in front of me this whole time. matt came here too, he came to where we met the first time.

he stumbled into the forest after getting chased by a couple of guys once he tried to start a fight.

something brushed by the bushes alerting me, a boy in an oversized hoodie over his stained red white tee. jeans scuffed and a little dirty as he flops down on the grass in front of me. i can hear him panting as his chest rose and fell with deep breaths.

he tilts his head to finally see me, i still sit there frozen with my book in hand slowly reaching for my keys being cautious incase he tries to go for me next. “i see, you know. im not gonna hurt you. i would never hit a girl.” his words are slow and very unconvincing. “do you talk? he asked, glancing at me again. he finally sat up and came closer to me, my hand clutches the house keys even harder as he steps plop in front of me.

his body collides with the tree as he sits next to me, his sweet and salty cologne fills my senses, feeling it cloud my thoughts. he takes the book from my hands and closes it looking around at it.

“everything has changed by cynthia atlan, we crave love so much we would trade anything for it, including ourselves. caleb and cam grew up together, had their first kiss together but still haven’t thought about getting together. when highschool life takes a horrible turn the two become separated and distant, caleb doesn’t wanna let cam go but life takes turns and loops. how are they able to navigate hormones, relationships and life? sounds like a hoot.” his sarcastic voice says otherwise.

“this caleb guy doesn’t sound like he really deserved her huh…” he flips through the pages quickly glancing at a couple words per page.

“well, i guess i should go, but i’ll see you around here i hope.” his smile beamed brightly as he pushed himself up and looked back at me.

“hm, maybe” it comes out almost as a whisper. his face lights up as he takes my words as an accomplishment. “yeah, i’ll see you around here, tomorrow.”

he never gave me my book back before he left and i didn’t even realise it. i guess that’s one way to make me come back

“matt?” i get out between choked sobs. i didn’t even need to see his red eyes and face to tell he’s also been crying.

he peered over to where i was looking up and down before attempting to wipe away his tears and sadness. i didn’t think twice before joining him.

his brown hair is tousled by him running his hand through it many times and his tear stained eyes tell more than what he wished.

“y/n i-i’m so s-sorry.” his tears spilt once more making any effort of wiping them away futile. he wrapped his arms around something and hugged it tight. it was my book he stole from me when we first met. “i’m so so so fucking sorry i’m such an idiot.”

“matt, please it wasn’t your fault. but i am terrified, i don’t want to ever go back to school.” my voice cracks while trying to get through that sentence. matt doesn’t even utter another word before he tugs me into him, straddling him as he wraps his arms around me in a tight hug.

“i’m so sorry y/n, i didn’t wanna face anyone after i left. when i walked in everyone was applauding and people shook my hand, i had no clue why until chris and nick texted me about it.”

his pure sincerity makes me suffocate him a little more not wanting anyone else around but him. he puts a hand around my cheek guiding it to him to kiss, i get a good look of his equally dishevelled face.

��we are so fucked.” i giggle a little thinking about how much a shit show this will be when we get back.

“is this what they mean in everything has changed that high school life would take a bad turn? because i’m happy to go through it if it means we get our happy ending. you’re my end, end game.”

“yes matt, this is everything. we are the happy ending. we are end game” my quivering lips connect with his.

[strniohoeee]

hii can u please write a matt fic where reader is a singer(shes his gf already) and she had a show one day so when she performed he was there and like the choreography for one of the dances was very slutty(kinda like vigilante shit live performance by taylor swift)and then the night they are at home and they’re in bed matts like “u looked so fucking hot today doing that dance” and one thing leads to another and smutty smut smut happens totally fine if u dont like this idea love u💕

Remedy

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: Y/N is a singer and after a seductive performance Matt is left feeling some type of way. Will he act on these urges??🌑

Warnings⚠️: SMUTTTTT. Mirror sex, slight choking, matt being a little slutttt, and that’s about all. Enjoyyyy teehee🤭

Song for the imagine: Novacane- Frank Ocean

⚠️This is an 18+ imagine, so minors do not interact, or do??⚠️

But there's no drug around

Quite like what I found in you, you

I loved singing and I was so fortunate enough to be Matt’s girlfriend because he knew people and was able to get me gigs. I was so fucking thankful for him because without him I would still be singing in my room and posting it to YouTube.

Tonight I actually had a show for this talent show type of thing in town. It was a pretty big event, but also a talent show designed by people who are looking to scout out the next Ariana Grande. I was super grateful that Matt was able to pull some strings and get me in. I wasn’t sure that I wanted to be this huge famous singer, but to catch the eyes of people who could make me famous, and just get my name out there a little more did sound appealing.

I was super excited to perform this set because I was able to get a few backup dancers and come up with a seductive and powerful dance. I actually was so excited to step outside of my comfort zone and perform something totally different.

Currently I was getting ready with my backup dancers waiting to be called next, and I was so fucking nervous I mean I never did anything like this, and to have Matt, Chris and Nick all watching formed a pit in my stomach.

Not to mention this was my first time dancing on stage in front of a bunch of people in heels….. I was so fucking scared. We wore black blazers with black lingerie under, fishnet stockings and red heels. This was all so new to me I felt like throwing up. I’ve never worn anything like this publically. But I decided to shake it off, and get ready.

My group and I were the last ones on stage, and we decided they would walk out first, and then me. I looked onto the stage and saw the props being set up, black chairs where we would basically be doing lap dances on. God why did I want to throw up so much? I think it was the fact that Matt and his brothers were front row…

They called out my name, and my girls walked out first sitting the chairs with their legs crossed. I took one last deep breath before walking out and standing sitting in my chair. Suddenly the lights when up on us, and the song started playing

“I bust the windows out your car, and no it didn’t mend my broken heart” I sang out looking up

“I’ll probably always have these ugly scars, but right now. i don’t care about that part” I sang slowly getting up from my chair

I kept singing as I slowly unbuttoned my blazer. Earning cheers from the crowd

I slowly walked to my chair standing behind it “You see you can’t just play with peoples feelings” I sang as I seductively ran my hand down the front of the chair

“Tell them you love them, and don’t mean it” I sang walking to the front of chair

Slowly I turned around bending over slightly to show my ass as I sat down on the chair, giving my back to the crowd.

“You’ll probably say that it was juvenile, but I think that I deserve to smile” I sang running my hand through my hair

Two of my backup dancers came over helping me out of my blazer. Allowing my half naked body to be on display

I leaned back showcasing my neck and half covered breast to the crowd

“I bust the windows out your car, You know I did cause i left my mark” I sang slowly coming back up

I turned over continuing to sing as I ran my hands over my body, spreading my legs and leaning forward. Locking eyes with Matt in the crowd

My backup dancers came over to me running their hands all over my body as I rolled my neck back as I sang.

As I sang we started to dance swaying our bodies, grabbing onto each other. They circled me before getting down on their knees raking their hands up my legs and to my ass

“You could never feel how I felt that day. Until that happens baby you don’t know pain” I sang as we did our next move which was laying on the floor with our legs spread open, and then putting our right left over the left and turning us over. Lifting our ass off the floor slowly as I continued to sing.

“You broke my heart, so I broke your car” I sang slowly getting up and running my hands up my body

“You caused me pain, so I did the same” I sang as we swayed our hips to the beat

We were nearing the end of the performance, and I never felt more powerful than now.

As I sang the last part I seductively walked over to my chair sitting down, and one of my dancers came over sitting on my lap as I ran my hands up her body.

“Now watch, I bust the windows out your car” I sang before the song ended

Everyone was standing up cheering and clapping and whistling at us. We all got up bowing and waving at everyone blowing kisses before we ran off stage.

“HOLY SHIT THAT WAS AMAZING GUYS” I said to my girls

“Dude we fucking killed it” they said as we tried to catch our breath

“I’m so proud of you guys for killing it tonight” I said pulling them into a group hug

We all changed into our regular clothes, saying our goodbyes and heading out. I met Matt and his brothers outside.

“Babyyyyy you fucking did amazing holy shit” Matt said smiling at me and pulling me in for a hug

“Thank you baby” I said kissing him

“Y/N you fucking ate that shit up, I would’ve never thought you were like that” Nick said hugging me too

“I was so nervous I didn’t think I had that in me either” I said laughing

“Yeah I almost felt like I wasn’t supposed to see some of those moves” Chris said laughing and hugging me

“Stoppp thank you guys” I said laughing

We headed out to have a celebratory dinner before heading back home.

When we got back to the triplets house I decided to shower and change into some pajamas before heading to Matt’s bed.

“Thank you for coming tonight” I said to Matt as I snuggled up to him

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world” he said winking at me

“You’re too good to me” I said kissing him

“My sexy girlfriend singing and dancing, how could I not be front row” he said smiling into the kiss

“You’re making me blush” I said smacking his chest playfully

“That dance was so fucking hot, and that outfit whewww could’ve sworn I got hard” he said in a whisper

“Oh yeah?” I asked smirking at him

“Might have to buy you more lingerie and fishnets now” he said licking his lips

“You dirty boy” I said to him

He glanced at me before pulling me in to smash our lips together. A heated kiss full of tongue and clashing teeth. So needy and hungry….fuck I needed Matt now

He pulled me on top of him, deepening our kiss as he ran his hands down my back and to my ass, gripping.

“God you drive me crazy” he said pulling away and running his tongue along his teeth

“I need you like now” I said running my fingers along his face

“Me too” he said his pupil dilated

I lifted up pulling my shirt off exposing my chest to Matt as I leaned forward smashing our lips together again. Running my hands up Matt’s shirt causing him to shiver.

I moved my kisses to his jawline, and then down to his neck. Peppering kisses down his neck causing him to moan

“Feeling good Matty?” I asked looking up at him

“Always” he said breathlessly

Matt lifted up to remove his shirt

“I love your tattooed arm” I said running my hands along his arm looking over at him to see him already staring at me

“Yeah?” He asked his chest rising up and down

“So so hot…maybe you can fuck me with your arm around my neck” I said winking at him

His eyes widen before his cheeks redden a bit.

I lean back down as I kiss him again, our chests touching making my skin burn and my heart flutter with desire.

I slid off of Matt to take my underwear off, he took off his pajama pants as well along with his underwear. When I looked over to him he was looking over at the mirror that’s diagonal from his bed.

I smirked, and looked at him

“Want to fuck me infront of the mirror pretty boy?” I asked

“If you want me to” he said looking over at me

“I want nothing more” I said

He pulled me back on top of him continuing to kiss him

I slowly started to grind on his dick allowing my arousal to cover him

“Mmm keep doing that and I’ll cum” he said looking down in between us

I moaned at his words and the feeling of his thick cock hitting my clit. I shuddered around him

“Gonna let me fuck that pretty pussy go yours?” He asked running his hands up my body

“Please” I mewled out

Matt lifted up slowly allowing me to fall back as he leaned over, wrapping his hand around my neck as he kissed me. Using that same same hand to turn my head as he kissed down my neck to my chest and down the valley of my breasts

From the valley of my breast he licked his way up back to my mouth where we made out

“I can’t hold out any longer” he said pulling

“Fuck me Matt” I croaked out

Matt lifted me up and brought me to the corner of his bed facing towards the mirror

“You get to watch me fuck you dumb” he said running his hand down my back and smacking my ass

“Oh Matt” I moaned out

He massaged my ass looking into my eyes through the mirror. He licked his lips before bringing his dick to my entrance slowly sliding into me

I let my mouth fall open as I gripped the sheets. Matt stretched me out so good everytime we fucked it made my head dizzy.

“So tight” he said bottoming out as he let his head roll back

“Fuck Matt you feel so good” I moaned out

Slowly he started to thrust into me, deep and harder. Our moans filling the room as he fucked into me

Matt gripped my waist as he fucked me causing me to fall more limp into the bed as I watched him in the mirror.

Matt’s mouth was hung open as he grunted into me, looking over at me in the mirror as his cold eyes laid on mine. Causing me to clench down on him, my stomach burning with arousal

“Shitttttt” I moaned out gripping the sheets harder

Matt kept pounding into me as he smacked my ass occasionally. I was just watching him as moans and pants fell out. My mouth hung up as I started to drool on the sheets.

“Am I fucking you dumb?” He asked licking his lips

“Y-Yes” I moaned out shutting my eyes as he started to drill into me even faster

Matt lifted me up by my hair causing me to gasp

“Look at yourself, making a mess on my cock” he said whispering into my ear as he looked into my eyes through the mirror

“Fuck Matt” I moaned out letting my head fall forward slightly as my mouth hung open

Matt pulled me back wrapping his tattooed arm around my neck as he pounded into me

“MATTT” I moaned out at the new feeling

“I’m giving you your wishes” he grunted out

His dick hitting all the right places, and I was pure puddy in his arms

“I get to watch you take my cock like a good slut and your perfect tits bounce in the mirror” he said grabbing my right breast and squeezing

“I’m going to cum” I moaned out letting my head fall forward slightly

“Me too baby, come on give it to me. I’m begging for it pretty girl” he said into my ear

Matt’s hips were snapping into me in such a delicious way, my mouth fell slack and I started to drool on his arm.

“Drooling on me now are we? Am I fucking you that good?” He asked biting his lip

“Fuck Matt…YES YES SO GOOD” I moaned out as he brought his other hand down to rub my clit

“Come on baby cum on my cock” he said rubbing faster

“Fuckkkkk” I moaned out started to quiver against him

“Give it to me I know you can” he said

“I- I’m- I’m gonna cum” I stuttered out

My mouth fell slack as I clenched down onto Matt. My orgasm washing over me as I shook on Matt’s cock. My thighs shaking and giving out on me

“Fuck Matt oh my god” I said breathing heavily as I looked at him through the mirror

“I’m gonna cum baby” he said moaning into my ear

He let me lean forward as he pulled out stroking his dick before letting his jaw fall slack. His lower abdomen began to quiver as he came on my ass

“Fuckkk y/n” he moaned out as he shuddered

He looked at me through the mirror trying to catch his breath.

“You look so fucking sexy like this” he said licking his lips

“Fuck Matt I love you so much” I said blissed out

“I love you so much too” he said

Matt got off the bed grabbing a warm towel and cleaning me up. Before helping me off the bed.

“Let’s shower” he said helping me to his bathroom

Matt and I showered, and then got out. We decided to have a snack before heading back to his room to watch a movie. We eventually dozed off in each others arms.

The End

I know I said I wasn’t in the mood to write,but suddenly I got in the mood. So I hope you enjoyed this one. As much as I did🤭🖤🖤

-J💅🏽

[ivysturnss]

Transition -Sturniolo Triplets

Summary:Where the triplets come back home and have some news waiting for them.

Warnings: FLUFF!!! Usual swearing , mentions of surgery , crying ,questioning ur gender and I think that's it.

Pairing: older bro!triplets x ftm!reader

A/N: reader is 17 in this and I'm sorry if its bad I thought of this on the spot

Nick Matt Chris MaryLou You

------------------------------

You was currently sat up on the kitchen counter with my mom infront of u calming u down whilst small tears run down ur cheeks "What if they don't accept me!" "Buddy look at me please" you wipe ur nose with a tissue your mom had given u a few minutes prior then drifting ur eyes to look at her. "Are you listening to yourself right now , one of your brothers is gay and they accepted him ur not any different sweetie!" "I am though , nick hasn't changed he just likes boys but ive changed completely I haven't seen them in 9 months and the last time they saw me I was their little sister with long curly hair and braces." you say slightly raising ur voice and tears were now flowing heavily.

It was true the last time u had seen ur triplet brothers u had curly brown hair what hung just past ur chest , braces with pink bands , nails did but very short what u was forced to have done by ur best friend. None of ur friends and family knew at the time but just before ur brothers had came 9 and a half months ago u was questioning ur gender , long nights spent scrolling through tiktok and Pinterest looking at hairstyles for boys , male clothing just anything "boyish" in general and that's when it dawned on you. Im trans! You took inspiration from matts anxiety journal to make your own journal but instead of it being for anxiety you named it "Transition Journal". Any spare time you had you would write down ur thoughts , ways to tell ur family, name ideas and in the end it was full to the brim. It was a mix of a scrapbook and a diary it had photos cut out of outfits and where to buy the clothes and accessories from written next to it aswell as haircuts cut out so when u came out and got ur hair done you could show the barber what u wanted.

"No one else in the family views u any different so I highly doubt they will but if they dont they are getting the next flight back to la and never coming back in this house!" This makes you let out a little laugh and smile "That's not very nice you can't just kick them out like that" " I suppose that is a bit mean but whatever it takes to have u happy!" "Thanks , I'm so tired after all this crying so I'm going to get out of this and take a nap but can u text me when they are here and where they are in the house?" "Of course I can I'll also tell them not to go in your room have a good nap!"

3 hours and 15 minutes later

Your pov:

I wake up from my nap and automatically hear shouting and laughter downstairs so without even checking my phone I know my brothers are home , I sit up against my headboard and grab my phone and reply to a few of my friends who messaged me before checking my moms message.

Mom

-Hey buddy , we are all sat in the living room but we are watching a film so they are distracted so if you want a drink you will be able to get to the kitchen if you move quick enough.

You

-Alright I'll come down now please keep them distracted

read

I put my socks back on and fix my hair a bit before grabbing my phone and putting it in my pocket then quietly making my way to the stairs. I get halfway down and look to my side to see them all engrossed on the tv so I make a run for it running down the stairs and into the kitchen. I open the fridge and take out one of my Arizonas and slowly walking into the living room. When I reach the couch i sit down beside Chris casually taking a sip of my drink placing it on the small wooden table next to his pepsi. "There you are how was ur nap flo?" he asks still not taking his eyes of the tv but hearing him call u your dead name just felt weird the last time u was called it was a few months ago by a substitute in school but that wouldn't happen anymore as u had just graduated. I didn't answer him as technically he was speaking to no one and this makes him look at me , his head hadn't even turned half way before he quickly stands up Infront of me "What the fuck are u standing up for!" All i do was stare back at him as my body just froze there was two ways this could go he could either hug me and support me or could shout at me and leave and i wasn't sure what was happening. Matt and nick look over at me and do the exact same thing as chris and stand either side of him and because none of them where speaking i decide to.

End of ur pov

"I um.. I transitioned" your voice came out quietly but loud enough for everyone to hear. Your parents thought it was best for u to have this moment alone so they got up and walked into the kitchen shutting the door behind them. "We can see that, when did this happen" he asks in a soft tone but still in shock. It was pretty obvious to those around u that you wasn't a girl anymore u had short hair, a light stubble , you looked more masculine and u was currently wearing black and blue plaid pj bottoms with a vintage tee u had thrifted a few days ago. "Before u came the last time I was questioning it and I made a entire notebook full of things I still have it if u wanna see but anyway I told mom and dad like a month or 2 after u left and it just went from there I guess." "And why did u not tell us sooner?" "Well I wanted to tell u guys in person so that's why I waited till u came back and that's what I'm doing now". The 3 just nod and sit on the floor infront of u "Do you have a name like a name u want to be called from now on?" Matt asks putting on of his hands on ur knee comfortingly "Yeah I do actually , it's Finn but mom and dad call me buddy aswell!" "Good choice bud I like that name". "Do you think you'd ever get surgery?" "Well we looked into it and I'm at the right age as u have to be 16 and I'm 17 but we want to wait a bit before I do as we just wanna go day by day and not jump into it all at once y'know!". Matt looks over at nick and nick just nods knowing what he was going to say "Finn I don't wanna sound rude but who do u like?" "What do u mean who do I like?" "What's ur sexuality like I'm straight so is Chris and Justin but nicks gay so what are u?". I take a deep breath knowing this question was coming and try to hold back the tears but that doesn't happen. Nick is fast to move and sits beside u pulling u into a hug. "You don't have to tell us right now if u don't want to we can wait." "Mhm we will wait as long as u want us to wait" "No ill tell u" you sit back up but take nicks hand and he rubs his thumb against the back of ur hand. "As you now know I'm trans so ur probably thinking I like girls but I don't I still like boys". "Thank you for sharing this with us we are proud of you" "Just so you know we love you even more" "I love you guys aswell" "Guys do you know what this calls for?" "If I'm thinking what ur thinking I'm totally down" "Celebratory McDonald's?" "DUHHH". Nick and Chris run off to the car whilst matt stays back with you. "How about u get that notebook of urs and we can look at it whilst having our McDonald's." You nod and run up stairs to get the notebook whilst matt goes to the car.

35 minutes later

You was all sat in the McDonald's parking lot finishing up ur food and going through ur notebook. "Whys there a photo of my head? Chris questions pointing at the photo "It's because this is one of haircut pages and I liked ur hair back then so I was going to get it but I didn't in the end." "I think you would suit it you should definitely try it one time". "Hold on this is a very important question." "What is it?" "Do u watch RuPaul?" "I love that shit I watch it all the time" "MATT DRIVE US HOME RIGHT NOW ME AND FINN A STAYING UP ALL NIGHT AND BINGE WATCHING RUPAUL START THAT ENGINE!" the car erupts into laughter as matt starts the car to drive you guys home.

@6ix9inewiturmom @nicksbf @thenickgirl @soontosturniolo @delilahsturniolo @dirtylittleheart333 @pvssychicken @nicksbestie @talulahinthestars @nicksgirlfriend @schlutt4matty @obsessionsarenotfortheweak @zariyam @little-bisexual-intern @toysizee @sturniolowh-0-re @sturnobsessedwh0re @vanteguccir @mattthemunchsbiggestfan @delimeats-000 @sturnfannn @slutforsturnioloss @evie-sturns

[steifel]

HERE TO ASK YOU ABOUT UR TRANS JOHNNY AND SODA HEADCANONS 🫡

I may have gone a little over bord with these

TW: self harm, suicidal thoughts, transphobia, gender dysphoria, talks of body parts. Everything is very minor but please protect your peace

Sodapop

-first off She cam out to Johnny first on accident Darry had taken Pony to the doctors so nobody was home Soda wanted to test a theory. She was dancing around the house in a mini skirt and a stuffed bra Johnny walked into the house and was like "you wanna talk about this? You don't have to"

-soda literally broke down telling Johnny everything

-poor Johnny has no idea how to comfort people but he just sat there listening and understanding

-she told Pony next they were laying in bed one night and the conversation went like this

S: hay Pone? You know how Johnny was born a girl but hes really a boy?

P: mhm

S: well sometimes i feel like i might be your sister even though ive always kind of been your brother

P: *pulling Soda into a big hug* ok

S: thats it just ok

P: um okay.... I love you?

S: love you too pony

-she told Darry next and he required a lot more information than ponyboy did.

-how long have you known

- she/her?

-who all knows

-is your name still Sodapop

-how do you feel

-do you want me to help you tell anyone

-is there anything i can do to help you?

-after Darry got all the information he needed he just hugged his sister and said "i always wanted a little sister"

-she told Steve next

-he was actually kind of excited

-after she told Steve she started living as a girl 100% of the time

-Twobit and Dally were super confused but they eventually figured it out

-Soda is a woman of extremes she is ether so eurphoric shes ontop of the world or so dysphoric that she can barely get out of bed

-her bad dysphoria days just about kill Steve

-he knows that she's the most beautiful girl in the world and it hurts him that she doesn't know that

-when she's dysphoric he always gives her one of his long shirts to wear and then holds her in bed as long as she needs just telling her shes beautiful and playing with her hair.

-when she's super euphoric you bet your ass Steve is gonna take her out and show her off (if anyone says anything bad they get jumped)

-if/when she goes on E she wears push up bras every day and that makes Steve go crazy

-if you think Soda was hot as a guy than you'll think shes a goddess as a girl

-Steve feels so lucky

-its not all fun and games though

-she gets jumped a lot

-the socs can be very vilont with her

-she tends to silently cry herself to sleep a lot

-her and Johnny get really close

-they actually trade pre transition cloths

-johnny teaches her all of the "girl" stuff he learned in childhood and she teaches him the "guy" stuff

-believe me when i tell you that Soda is a MASTER at tucking

-she wears super tight pants and skirts

-Soda is suuuuper fem

-she loves doing her hair and makeup

-this pisses pony off because she takes forever to get ready in the mornings

-the one bathroom thing starts to become a problem now that Soda takes an hour to get ready

Johnny

-was absolutely terrified to come out to the gang

- he put it off for a long time

-came out to Dall first

-and he only came out at this point because Dally could tell something was bothering his little buddy

"So you gonna tell me whats wrong or am i gonna have to guess?"

-dall was genuinely so mad. Not because he's trans but because Johnny had the gaul to ask if Dally hated him now

-when he told Pony he had a shit ton of questions

-this is mostly the reason Pony didn't have a lot of questions when Soda came out

-johnny is one of those lucky bastards that naturally looks masculine so he passes almost immediately

-he never gets out of his baggy clothes and flanels phase (me projecting)

-every single member of the gang makes him take his binder off after 8 hours

"Comon Dall just a little while longer? Please"

"Jonnycakes we can do this the easy way or the hard way now it dont matter to me but i gotta fealing you're not gonna like the hard way"

-eventually Johnny starts to feel more comfortable around the gang without it

-if he's in public though he doesn't give a fuck what dallys "hard way" is he will be wearing that binder

-while Soda usually experiences her transness through euphoria Johnny usually experiences his through disphoria

Another TW for SH and Suicidal thoughts ill let you know when it ends

-he has a tendency towards SH

-one time dally found him attempting to give himself top surgery and he had actually gotten pretty far

-Dally was horrified he's no stranger to blood and violence but it was really bad

-Johnnys gotten a lot better but there was one point where they hid all the knives and did there best to have somebody with him at all times

-Darry has had to grab his hands and hold him super tight before

-Dally had a really hard time sleeping during this time he made Johnny stay with him and he just watches Johnny sleep.

-Dally was just terrified he was gonna lose Johnny over something as stupid as how the world sees him

Major TW over

-on major dysphoria days he really just wants to be left alone.

-he mainly just sleeps on those days

-the whole gang tries to help but sometimes you just have to feel your feels you know

-he cries because of it sometimes and that just makes the dysphoria worse which makes him cry more (me too me too)

-Johnny absolutely loves it when the boys roughhouse with him cause it makes him feel like they really see him as a guy

Ok i feel like if i keep talking about Johnny im ether gonna start crying or just spill every bit of information about my transness. anyway i hope you enjoyed

[hermanunworthy]

!DNDADS S2 EP38 SPOILERS!

i cant believe its already time for another episode. so scared about this one i have no idea whats gonna happen. lets go!

- WHY IS BETH BRITISH

- LITTLE CAESARS I WORK THERE omg me reference in dndads

- THE JOKES IN THE INTRO ARE SO GOOD

- TAYLOR SWIFT A KILLER AT HEART.

- taylor considers scary his close friend awww

- MATT STOP IT W THE BITTERSWEET LINC FACTS ABOUT HIS RELATIONSHIP W HIS DADS!!! IM SAD

- NORMAL IS A HEELYS KID love that. oh my god just imagine the school mascot just rolling through the halls thats kinda terrifying actually

- I BETTER ACTUALLY SEE BETH IN HEELYS AND FREDDIE IN HIGH HEELS AT THE LIVE SHOW

- im sorry. i just went to the discord to talk about this^ but then saw SUCH A CRAZY SPOILER

- NOOO THE SCARY FACT

- ITS STARTING. MY STOMACH HURTS IM NERVY

- TEAM LOVE WE CAN DO THIS. WE CAN DO THIS (im biting my nails nervously)

- WHY IS MATT ASKING ABOUT THE MARRIAGE RN

- OH FUCK SCARY DOESNT KNOW ABOUT THE MARRIAGE HELPP

- NAT 20??? MY JAW FUCKING DROPPED

- TEAM LOVE LETS FUCKING GOOOOO (im miserable about lincoln and grant)

- oh god sparrow what could u possibly say rn to try to make this better.

- LARK COULDVE KILLED LINC???

- will mentioning batman is making me wonder where hermie is. im insane

- "i dont want a dad!" WAAAAAA 😭

- i KNEW this whole start of the episode would be awkward as hell lmao

- gothcleats....

- HEMRIE AND NICKY!!!! HERMIE AND NICKY!!!!! i actually screamed my bad

- NICKY AS THE LEADER LETS FUCKING GOOOO

- scary applogizing???

- going back to the church of the doodler oh god this is happening

- THE CATBUS!!! THE PUSSYWAGON!!!! YESSS

- anthony w the cat facts so cute

- i cant BELIEVE how far along in the season we are. this is insane. oh my god

- GRANT BROUGHT THE BABY MONITERS :[

- oh the mayor finally has a name now!

- WILLYS IN THERE GODDD

- im so nervous WHATS GONNA HAPPEN

- CAN SOMEONE PLZ DO FANART OF THE STAINED GLASS WINDOW

- STFU WILLY!!!!

- ME WHEN BLUE AND RED SYMBOLISM -deranged yttd fan

- YES FUCKING KILL HIM!!!!

- FOR ONCE. FOR ONCE. NORMAL IS CHOOSING VIOLENCE AND HATE OVER LOVE AND FORGIVENESS. DESERVED.

- CAN WILLY FUCKING PROJECT DAMAGE TO HIM TO OTHER PEOPLE??? THATS FUUUUUCKED MAN

- NO. NO. WILLY DID NOT...... WILLY IS TAYLORS STEPDAD NOW. WTF.

- WILLY IS A STEPDAD NOW. I AM GOING TO THROW UP.

- NOOOOOO I HATE THIS SO BAD THIS IS THE WORSTTTT I HATE WILLY STAMPLER

- im still biting my nails im SO SCARED

- SCARY TRYING TO SCARE WILLY RON STYLE YESSSS

- *HERMIE*S GONNA TRY TO GRAPPLE WILLY????

- NICKY COMPLETELY FUCKING UP THE PLAN LMAOOO

- 10 MINUTES LEFT.... HOW ARE THEY GONNA PULL THROUGH

- 11:11 the teens are gonna pull through!!

- SCARYS IN THE CHAIR OH GOD OH GOD

- THE DOODLER IS FREE. ITS THERE. OH MY LORDY LORD

- THIS IS GONNA BE THE MOST IMPORTANT DICE ROLL OF THE WHOLE SEASON. FUUUUCK

- i have it paused. i swear. to FUCKING god. if its a 1.

- THE DOODLERS GONNA SPEAK OH MY LORD

- YESSSSSSSSS LOVE WINS!!!!!!!

[splishsplashyouropinionistrash]

We’re back, bitches!

You will never escape me.

It’s time, once again, for AFTG Hot Takes, the show where I just say whatever the fuck pops into my head.

Today’s topic: Kevin Day and his romantic interests.

Now, okay, I’ve discussed this a bit in previous posts. I’m not going to go too far in depth for the two ships I’ve talked about already.

Please, for the love of god, these are just my opinions. I’m literally just a teenager on the internet. It’s not that deep, you don’t need to write a ten paragraph essay on why grooming is okay (although tbf that made my night. Still waiting on a reply, bb)

With that out of the way, let’s get into it.

I’ll be honest, I’m not a fan of most Kevin ships. I only like two of them, so we’ll save those for last.

1. First up we’ve got Kevandriel, Kevneil, and Kevandrew (pls dont @ me, i’m not 100% on those names)

I hate it. Despise it. Just so bad. Ew.

I made a whole post on why I have Kevandriel, read it if you want. 

Kevandrew (Kevin/Andrew) just doesn’t make any sense. Their personalities don’t mesh at all. Kevin doesn’t take no for an answer, which is something that is so important for Andrew.

Kevneil (Kevin/Neil) is one I just don’t like because, as we all know, I am a petty bitch. I don’t have a reason for disliking it, really. It just... idk, gives me the ick.

2. Moving on, Kevin and Thea.

I made a post regarding this one too, check it out (or don’t).

I don’t feel like rehashing all of that tho, honestly. (but pls feel free to read the reblogs, some were v good and others just made me cackle. Still looking at you, grooming guy)

3. Now, onto the ones I haven’t discussed. We’ll go with Kevjean first.

So, I mean... it’s not impossible that this actually happened in cannon, however. Just judging by the reactions these two had to each other once Jean was out of the Nest, them sustaining a healthy relationship would be nearly impossible.

Also, I am a diehard Jerjean fan (thanks gus_47, I blame you and the masterpiece that is Hoax for this) so I just... can’t bring myself to picture Jean with anyone else.

4. Kevin and Jeremy!

Listen, I don’t hate this one. I simply adore those fun lil fics where Kev is tripping over himself cause he’s in love with Jeremy (looking at you, quicksand). They’re so fun! But, Jerjean owns my soul (again, thank you Hoax) so it’s gonna have to be a no from me.

5. Kevin and Matt

I’ll be real with you, I didn’t know this existed until yesterday, and I am shocked.

I haven’t stopped to think about it much, and I probably won’t, because Dan. I just- that is her husband, excuse you.

6. Kevallison (Kevin/Allison)

I don’t mind this one, honestly. I sorta get it, tbf. 

HOWEVER.

Diehard Renison fan. Enough said.

And now, at last, we come to the two Kevin ships that I can (and do!!) suport whole-heartedly.

7. Kevaaron !! (Kevin/Aaron)

Listen, I just love their personalities. I love the idea of these two assholes healing together. Simply adore.

Before you say it (you know who you are, and yes I’m still salty ab this) I. Don’t. Ship. It. Because. I. Want. Andrew. And. Kevin. Together. ffs, people. What kind of person do you think I am? 

8. Kevin and... (drumroll please)

Himself!

I am 100% in support of aroace Kevin living his best life with his friends and family.  

I mean, it’s lovely. Spectacular. 10/10, adore it.

Okay okay I’m done (for now)

Let me know what other hot takes you’d like to hear!

And as always, if you disagree with anything I’ve said, fight me! I mean that, i love a bit of lighthearted discourse. (unless your opinions are truly heinous, in which case I will verbally punch you in the trachea.)

Blah blah hitman, blah blah death threats

[thepiratefish]

An eddsworld AU I made Up!

I've decided to call This Au Hero Monster Au HmAu for short.

In this Au, everything is basically the same But Tord Causes Tom to turn into his monster form.

He turns into there monster form after being hit by One of the rockets and he Throws a Harpoon into the Rocket instead of using a harpoon gun after Crawling out of the ruble.

When he sees Edd and Matt he sees they are Shocked and slightly scared of them This makes Tom feel betrayed Both because there scared of him and They were considering joining tord [They dont join him]

Eduardo also knowns Tord is the red Leader possibly becuase of his wanted poster or ect And tries to tell Tom that Tord's probably trying to manipulate them. Tom dosent think this at first becuase in this Au Tom and Tord are freinds but More like rivals also.

Tom did leave like in the End video and bought his house but instead of Edd and Matt living with him Eduardo Jon and mark end up being his roomates becuase they asked him if he was okay and tried to help them Edd and Matt did try to help them but only awhile after.

Jon did not Die in this Au but they did gain Ghost powers because of the radioactive satellite dish on the roof Eduardo still has some of there powers but They can only fly and use Some power beams that shoot out like bullets And mark ended up being extremely Persuasive and could convince -Almost- everyone not everybody.

Matt didn't gain any powers because Edd gained there powers when the Radioactive beam Shot out Hitting him and not Tom or Matt Mark and Jon got affected becuase they were In the house The satellite dish was on. Edd dose have powers still but there Much weaker He can hover but he can't Fly up to the side backwards or forwards They can only fly down Or just hover [kinda like feather fall] He can also use the ice powers they have but it can only cool others down or Freeze small areas of water.

Anyways This Has been My idea on an Eddsworld Au If any eddworld fan would like to try something with this Please put my name in the tag so people know I made the Au atleast and i also came up with this idea when practicing editing so i will post that id people want to see it :)

[wonderlandmind4]

Okay, I’m FINALLY home from work. It’s 6pm and I’m finally able to watch She Hulk. (it was when I started watching) LETS GO.

🚨MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD🚨

…did I absolutely miss something? Was that “female lawyer of the year” nom in an earlier episode? Did they just sneak that in? Am I crazy? (Edit: I just forgot because I’m dumb)

Oh fuck. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG I’m fucking, I’m panting, I’m, did I just run a marathon!? Matt just fucking comes WALTZING THE FUCK IN MAKING BLIND JOKES IMMEDIATELY I CANT I FUCCKING CANT OMG WHY AM I SO GIDDY I HAVE TEARS IN MY EYES WHY CANTI BREATHE

Gotta calm down to watch the rest of the episode *paperbagging it* my heart is racing. I’m sweating. Fuck. I had to pause and rewatch the seven 3 times

Omg the Sovokia Accors have been appealed!? Fuck yes! As in like completely gone? No more? Thank fuck. (Which I’m assuming that’s 100% Marvel confirming this Matt and NMUC Matt are the same Matt. Right? )

Omg he’s so fucking smug! MATT stop showcasing your own abilities in public as yourself! 😂😂😂

I looovvveeeee watching Matt lawyer it up!

I honestly wasn’t expecting to have that reaction…I couldn’t fucking BREATHEEEEE

…he’s such a smug beautiful snarky son of a bitch. I love this devil asshole

”we” “WE” MATT SAID WE!!!! That was as close to a Foggy name drop as possible, I’ll take it

…..who’s calling you Matthew???? Also……super secret because his phone wasn’t set up for the robotic voice Id 🤔 so that was definitely his DD phone and clearly upgraded to a smart phone instead of a burner

God, I fucking missed that smile, that crinkly eyed happy smile

“We’re all feeling this right? It’s not just me?” Oh Jen, HONEY, you have no idea how many people are combusting right now. I love Jen so much

…..bro that cgi was *ahem* could use some alot work during that fight scene…BUT I DONT CARE BECAUSE MMAATTTTT. (I really hope they don’t use a lot of cgi for the new DD show)

Matt was so tiny next to her 😂

She just ripped his helmet off omg, pick him just like an empty bottle of mustard

Was that…oh my fucking they used the original Daredevil music!!!! 😭

….that charming little fuck…oh I am loving this side of Matt so much

It was a mini hallway fight scene!!! 👏🏼👏🏼They’re GIVING it us aren’t they!? 😭

I HAVE NO ONE TO FREAK OUT TO ABOUT THIS!!!

Okay…okay…okayokayokay….the suit was still super menacing even with the gold because the light reflected off the horns and yeah…all of that was hot. (The fighting was better too)

…FUCK YESSSSS JENNIFER!!!!! YES GIRL GET IT!!! Fuck that devil for all of our sakes! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 I am LIVING for this!!! He was kissing her in the suit! HE WAS KISSING HER IN THE SUIT *dies* (lol at trying to figure out how to to get Matt out of the suit in the first place)

(Hey, um @pastafossa ….. this is reminding me a lot of TRT 🤔😂)

Daredevil casually doing the walk of shame! 😂

We get Matt and Nikki looking hot as fuck in this episode? My Bisexual heart is too fragile for this

Where’s Pug. Oh nvm. I found him!

Not that asshole filming Jen on top of stealing her blood. And not the other asshole biding on a Dora Milaje spear 😡🤬

Are we honestly going to blame Jennifer tearing down the screen as she was CLEARLY recorded without her knowledge!? I’ll fight them for you Jen! No one messes with you!

Listen. Best episode. I said what I said. And holy shit, I am LIVING right now! Matt was just sooo…I’m gonna say awesome and himself just a happier “in a better place” version of himself. He reminded me of college!Matt, happy and giddy and that stupid beautiful smirk of his. That smug, charming, quipping beautiful beautiful devil man. And his abilities!? That was perfect! Le sigh.

I missed him.

And this makes me…..cautiously optimistic about the Daredevil Born Again series.

…..Jen letting us know how absolutely satisfied Matt left her…

[iknaenmal]

Got tagged by @nintendont2502 :]

Hot or cold shower - hot because if I step into something just a little bit colder than the place I was before I will automatically freeze ��

Texting or calling - TEXTING OF COURSE I'm so awkward when I have to talk to someone oughg

Earbuds or headphones - headphones yeaaahhh!!!! I dont like earbuds because they hurt my poor little ears most of the time :| I got some which didn't, so I use them because I can't bring my headphones around sadly

Paperback or hardcover - i loooove hardcover books SO MUCH they're so cool and also they don't fold and break!!! I hate it when a book's paperback folds

Matte or gel - I literally have no idea what these mean

Twelve hour of twenty four hour clock - Twelve hour! It's more intuitive I think and I don't have to do maths everytime I look at it :] Oh yeah but only if the clock tells you if it's pm or am because otherwise it gets confusing

Sci fi or horror - sci fi because I never watched a horror movie iirc (my sister won't let me because she has nightmares) and also because my dad loves them and I watched so many Sci fi movies with him they grew on me

Blue or green - OUHG. okay I love green, especially light green. I mean there's nothing wrong with dark green I just generally prefer light tones for some reason. But blue has got SO MANY great and awesome shades oughgh I love blue too so I'm going to choose that one

Sunsets or sunrises - I think ive watched so many sunrises theyre not so cool anymore. I mean they're still really cool!! When going to school I see it sometimes and I always go "OOOOHH" but idk. Also sunstets' colors are prettier I think :0

Tulips or orchids - OOH I LOVE ORCHIDS ! ! they have really fun shapes and colors and they're very pretty I think!!! Tulips are great too but they dont have shapes as fun as the orchids imo

Candlelight or moonlight - Candlelights because theyre very warm and very pretty and they have kind of orange light and im the number one fan of orange, warm lights :DD

Pen or pencil - PENCIL I hate writing + drawing with pen >:| I can't erase stuff and it's hard and it also makes my handwriting even worse when I use a pen !!! Sadly we have to use pens at school and if we use pencils in exams that's an automatic fail so I need to get used to them asap

Pandas or koalas - I know they're overrated but 😔 I love pandas they're like bears in pajamas ouuhghg I love koalas though!!! Theyre very cute :]]

Gold or silver: silver is very very pretty yeahh!!! Even the name is pretty wow...... I love using silver crayons and stuff it gets shiny but not TOO shiny and that is important I think

Sneakers or boots - boots are really cool and warm but I never use anything that are not sneakers ! I just have a single pair of them every time so I just use them until they're torn apart ahahaah..

Denim or leather jacket - neither 😐

Pink or purple - OKAY I love pink its a very great color I think and it's also REALLY fun to work with but ooooh purple my beloved <3 it might actually be one of my fave colors

Chocolate or sour candy - OH im a chocolate lover

Drive in cinema or theatre - I've never been to a drive in cinema and it honestly seems so cool but! I love threatres theyre great and I love watching things in a huge screen yeahh :D

Deodorant or perfume - I HATE PERFUMES OUGH OUGH OUGH perfumes go away leave me alone

Pastel blue or earth tones - godd this ones hard ! As I said before I looove blue !!!! But earth tones are SO great and cool I love them a lot oooh

Lemonade or fruit juice - HELL YEAH FRUIT JUICE LOVERS RISE !!! I love fruit juice........ except orange juice. But I might be choosing this option partly because the last time I had lemonade was when i was like. Five or something so i don't remember how it tastes :p

Past or future - I'm not too sure what it means, I might just mean where you'd prefer to time travel but either way I'd choose future so yeah ! Like, I wouldn't go back to the past and live there, because it would end up being repetitive and the future would be more unexpected! Maybe what happens in the future is worse than what happened in the past, but you can't know that because you don't know what will happen, whereas in the past you know. And about time travel, I wouldn't go back to the past because im 100% sure I'd end up fucking the timeline up 😔

Aaaaand idk how many people I have to tag but here are some :]

@kindledrose @lemonylimetime @potatoisanartist @eowynnsstuffnthings @selenesaysstuff !! (You can just not do it if you don't want to ofc :]])

[shhh-no-ones-home]

heavy cross to bear* matt Murdock x reader

+++++++++ Request @juniebugg: reader and Matt are in a very serious relationship (could be married) but then when reader actually sees Elektra, whom she already knew about but has never seen because she was "dead," she gets really insecure and tells matt that he deserves better or something and he reassures her. Angst and smut"

hopefully its not too ooc this is my first MM smut so i hope you like! and thanks again for the request!!

* - you asked for smut and that really is all this is lol, little bit of story. 

Song: wasted time by skid row

tag list: @cynic-spirit @juniebugg

+++++++++

i sat at the table sipping coffee and thinking. it was almost nine at night and i knew i should be getting ready for bed but my body wasn't quite ready to move yet. when matt disappeared into our bedroom i figured he'd be changing into daredevil for the millionth time but when he emerged in his pajamas i was a little surprised. and then it hit me. maybe he knew. hell, he always knew.

but maybe it was just that something was off, that i needed him to say it again, to stay with me and make sure i knew. but then there was her. she had showed up out of nowhere and took me off guard more than anything else up until now. one more doubt at the forefront of my mind. that i didnt believe him when he said he loved me despite being married for a year, despite having dated for three before hand, and despite everything he has done to keep me safe. because he loved her first and it felt like the biggest lie ive ever been told. even after a couple days of sitting on it and hoping it would go away. still it was there. in the back of my mind:

"matt i dont know if i can do this anymore."

his head tilted to the side and he looked confused.

"do what?"

he asked almost worried, moving slowly to the table and sitting.

"this, us. i just- you deserve so much more, so much better than- well, than me."

he was quick to scoot his chair closer to my own, his hand coming to rest on mine.

"hey, dont even say that. what would make you think i would want anyone but you?"

now he absolutely sounded worried.

"i saw her matt."

"saw who?"

i shook my head.

"that woman, your ex. you said she was gone."

"elektra?"

he sounded a little broken.

"shes something else ill give her that much. i see why you like her."

he swallowed hard.

"elektra is dead."

i shook my head.

"then why was she here? looking for you. saying your name with such... god i dont even know how to explain it. matthew."

i repeated it exactly as she had said it and it felt wrong. like i was acting. saying someone elses emotions and intentions. they were no longer mine. or at least it seemed like it. There was a long silence and I just stared at him.

"She was here?"

There was hope in his voice and I figured that was it. It made me angrier than it probably should've and my only response was to stand and walk away. I got half way across the living room before he caught my arm.

"Y/n, that doesn't matter. I-"

He swallowed hard and I tried to study his face.

"You mean more to me than anything. Yes I love, loved, her but I married you. I chose you. I want nothing more than to be with you. For better or for worse remember?"

He bargained and I sighed heavily.

"How can I be sure you mean that? What if she comes back? again."

He shook his head, taking both my hands in his and stepping closer to me.

"Let me prove it to you. If she really is back then it doesn't matter. I'm with you, I love you, and I'll always chose you."

I closed my eyes, feeling him get closer and closer until his forehead was against my own.

"We belong together."

He whispered before kissing me gently.

"I only want you."

He kept just as quiet, kissing next to my mouth once, then twice, making his way across my cheek and to my jaw.

"Matt."

I breathed out and he paused. I licked my lips lightly before opening my eyes and looking at him. He really did seem like he meant it. He was trying so hard to keep it together.

"I can't lose you."

He sounded so broken.

"Do it."

He drew his brows and I brought my hand up to touch his face gently. We were still so close I could feel his breath fanning my neck.

"Show me you mean it."

I said softly and his Expression changed.

"I love you so much."

He said before kissing me harshly, releasing my hands and pressing his fingertips into my hips. I hummed against him as he walked us backwards. We stumbled along as he pulled my shirt up, tossing it to the floor.

"Matt."

I moaned, pulling his shirt up next. It was gone in a second and he was back, kissing me and moving quickly to get my pants down. His hands roamed my body just as much as mine roamed his. I traced my fingers slowly up his torso, grazing over his scars before wrapping my arms around his neck. I gasped when he picked me up. There was a soft laugh that escaped him and I was relieved to see him smile even if it was just a second. He knew it would take some convincing and he was right. I needed to know he meant it. That Elektra wasn't gonna be a problem.

"I need you."

He whispered again, laying me gently on the bed and situating himself between my legs.

"I need you to know how much I mean it."

He kissed my jaw slowly, then down my neck and across my collar bone.

"Prove it."

I challenged, my breath hitching in my throat as he ripped my bra open from the front, his lips grazing my nipple before taking it into his mouth. He hummed against me, his finger tips down my torso and into my panties.

"Matt."

I moaned, dropping my head back as he ran his finger up me and against my clit. i closed my eyes, pushing my head back into the bed as he stroked me, kissing his way back up to my exposed neck.

"i love you."

he repeated against the heat of my skin. when he resituated i could feel how hard he was already.

"i need you."

i breathed out, pressing my hips up into him as he continued to finger me.

"matt."

i whined, him removing his hand long enough to pull my panties down. i looked up to him with lust blown eyes, watching him intently as he got rid of his boxers.

"youre still okay with this?"

he asked and i nodded quickly, pulling his face to mine and kissing him deeply.

"please."

i moaned, inhaling deeply before he kissed me again, pushing his hips into mine. my breath caught in my throat as he pushed all the way into me, catching my bottom lip between his teeth as my mouth hung open.

"i wanna hear you."

he said softly.

"feel you."

he moaned against my shoulder, dropping his head to the crook of my neck as he placed his large palm over my heart. it was already banging at my rib cage begging to be let out but i could have swore it did when he started moving. he pulled out of me slowly before slamming back into me and i moaned so loudly i was surprised at myself. and then he did it again and again, getting a good rhythm. it was long, and hard. nothing like our nights prior, even on his worst of days when he's frustrated and in need of release. no this was different. purposeful.

"matt."

i held onto him for dear life, pressing my fingertips into his shoulder blades as he continued to pound into me in long drawn out strokes.

"tell me. tell me what you want."

he grunted out, trying to sound as steady as possible.

"i want you. god i only want you!"

i cried out as he thrusted upward harshly. then he did it again and i saw stars, my mouth falling open as i moaned.

"thats my girl."

he praised, trailing his hand down my torso and pressing his finger in circles against my clit.

"youre almost there."

he coaxed, building me up. i could feel the tightness building, pressing my hips up to meet him as he kept his pace.

"im so close."

i panted, pressing my finger tips harder into his bicep as i gripped onto him.

"do it, do it for me, let go."

he said softly and i snapped. my orgasm racked through my body and my vision went blurry. i was breathing hard as he rode out my high, still chasing his own.

"im almost there."

he said, squeezing his eyes shut. he moved to pull out but i wrapped my legs tightly around his waist.

"y/n?"

he asked surprised and i leaned up to kiss him.

"just do it."

i said, pressing a hard kiss to his neck. he kept going, knuckles going white against the bedsheets as he came in me with a loud groan.

"oh my god."

he panted, slowing his thrusts.

"i love you oh my god."

he said, dropping to his forearms, trying not to put his full weight on top of me. my legs were still wrapped tightly around his torso as we both calmed down.

"i love you too matty."

i said softly, feeling him nuzzle his nose against my neck. it made me giggle a little bit and i could feel him smiling against my skin before kissing it gently.

"you have no idea how relieved i am to hear that. youre the only one for me. always will be."

i sighed softly in content, kissing his forehead and dropping my legs.

"im sorry i doubted you. i just. i need a reminder every once in a while i guess."

he kissed my chest before pulling out of me and dropping to the bed beside me.

"i will give you as many reminders as you need, as long as we both shall live."

he said, taking my hand in his and kissing the back of it.

"thank you matt. thank you for everything. especially knocking some sense into me."

he raised a brow, a half smirk on his face and i immediately wondered what was going through that mind of his.

"after tonight sense might not be the only thing i knocked into you."

i couldnt help but laugh, him matching it as i rolled onto his chest.

"i know you want nothing more than to tell the father we're finally starting that catholic family with lots and lots of beautiful babies but i still have my iud."

he let out a short laugh sigh before i kissed him quickly.

"but that doesnt mean i couldnt be persuaded into getting it taken out."

he raised an intrigued brow.

"oh?"

i laughed lightly.

"ill think about it. right now i just wanna live in this moment with you."

i said the last bit through a yawn, resting my head against his chest and hearing his heartbeat.

"i love you."

he whispered, earning a hum from me as i dozed off.

[organic-guacamole]

episode 209 spoilers below

I'm so late today but here it is

I love EJ, he's finally learning to be happy. I'm so proud.

Ms Jenn = every boomer during zoom calls, like jeez yes we can hear you stop shouting at me.

LOVE THE SUBTLE JOKE ABOUT QUARANTINE "these dark times" "you mean spring break?"

ah yes, remember when we thought covid was just gonna give us a longer spring break? good times

SEBLOS

damn the passive aggressiveness from Carlos and the absolutely over it tone from seb✋

CASWELL COUSINS!!!!! THEY'RE THE BEST!!!!

we needed more if this kind of goofiness for the first part of season 2 that only such an iconic duo can provide.

old old movies-

is it even that old, or is Nini being a gen alpha rn-

i choose to imagine EJ being scared of the movie and hiding in Ashlyn's shoulder while she keeps a straight face and then EJ pretending to be tough afterwards

aww redlyn are soulmates.... yknow, if gingers had souls

(please ignore me)

y'all saw how EJ's face *lit up* when Gina logged on? how dare you tell me he doesn't like her

ofc she's no damsel in distress, she's Gina porter, she's amazing.

so do we think she'd be the type to just glare at suspicious people? or bark at them

do they not know that Rini broke up? or is Ms Jenn just wanting Nini to suffer through her heartbreak to make her a better actress....

speaking of, why is Nini in the call? she's not in the show anymore. Unless she is, even after the rose and the song got cut, which would be so unfair to all those that auditioned properly before she even came back but whatever, she's the main character I get it 🙄

big red is a hero honestly, Nini better thank him for changing the subject like that

I can't-

i won't work you over the break-

this woman would 100% work her kids 24/7 if it was legal and idk how to feel about it.

YES GINA USE THAT CHARM

QUEEN

FRENCH QUEEN

SHE LEARNT FROM THE BEST (antoine obvi)

smh the airport lady, eavesdropping on Gina's call.

The way she was so happy to answer EJ's call, "eej"

I love them your honour.

EJ WITH PAINTED NAILS YES PLEASE

great now we need to see Gina, Ashlyn and EJ having a complete spa day and EJ getting really into it and Gina and Ashlyn take pictures of him when he's laying down in a robe with a mask and cucumbers on his eyes.

finally we get to see Gina's side of portwell

the way she considered it as flirting, this is the sign she asked for in episode 6 come onnnnn

no is Asher/jack really doing tiktok dances in an airport-

Ricky is me. I am burrito.

oh Lynne, sweetie, I'm sorry but the blonde hair is not it

is that even the same lady or-

THE BEAN

THE CHICAGO BEAN

THE BIG OLD METAL BEAN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CITY 😭

jetlag is my go to excuse for anything... I haven't travelled in 2 years.

"welcome to the Lynne and Mike gossip show. where we talk about our depressed son that we both neglect in certain ways! And now a word from our sponsor, Nord VPN..."

SO MANY CANDLES

WHAT DEMON IS LYNNE TRYING TO SUMMON IN HIS ROOM-

is Nina becoming social media obsessed EJ from season 1? AND SHE LIED ABOUT HAVING SONGS TOO PLEASE WHY ARW THEY RECYCLING THE SAME PLOT-

Gina smiling at the picture of her family on Instagram makes me so happy, idek why.

EJ's nails are so pretty, we needed to see it more (unless he had it on for the rest of the episode and I just.... didn't notice🧍🏽‍♀️)

oh not the tiktok kid✋

yes ma'am end this strange mans whole tiktok career

sir take a hint and leave

GINA NO DONT SAY YOUR LAST NAME HE COULD BE A HUMAN TRAFFICKER

Ricky, walking in style✨

weird kid, ok then Lynne, can't you see he's this close to the edge?

not all your fault baby Ricky, Nini sucks a bit more

RICKY YOU DIDN'T COME DOWN HARD ON THE SONG-

YOU ASKED WHAT IT WAS ABOUT AND SHE SHUT YOU DOWN-

PLEASE DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF

ok but the deleting comment thing was very bad

still don't know if I like Jack honestly

hmmm so Nini's calling herself Nini instead of Nina in her little egg seat, while trying to write a song without inspiration.... Nini, honey, Ricky was your muse, he inspired you to write all those songs, even if it wasn't good for the relationship.

that doesn't mean you gotta get back with him, or that you can't write a song that not about him butttt it'll take some time

the rainbow sticker in her box and her rainbow shirt-

anyways wbk she's not totally straight

Jack are you a criminal?

quick, Gina, check his ankle for a tracker

THE YES AND PRACTICE STRIKES AGAIN

the way Gina wasn't into it in episode 6 but she's used the technique twice now

stole her grandma's Pomeranian-

Jack where the hell did you pull that out from-

the fake crying killed me, that looks like so much fun though

anyone wanna raid a first class lounge with me?

wait so is jack not gonna go in with her?

wouldn't he go in too? help look for the credit card? SO CONFUSED

the first class lounge guy was so into the drama though, watch his face when they start arguing 😭

sorry to break this to you Kourtney, but you haven't even blocked the second act yet soooo...

take that as you will

I love how all of them are totally dissing the dance off

that's the most realistic part of this show tbh

shouldn't Nini have asked how she knew....since the start? why is the fact that her best friend has knowledge of a North high secret now dawning on her...

Howie is sweet honestly, at least he's trying to help. but I stand with Kourtney, don't take him back just because he sang an amazing song, and is giving you a heads up on what's gonna happen...

KOURTNEY IS ME TRYING TO LEAVE AN ONLINE CLASS

I hate school

ooo Nini's writing a song about bad internet connection 🤩🤩🤩

I never lie, except when I do-

son that is the creepiest thing you could say to a stranger that you've been "helping"

2 truths and a lie👀

he's an Ariana fan 100%

called it.

OLDER BROTHER-

WHAT-

free spirit? damn so brother porter was in that horse movie

so has she been kissed or not?????????

I feel like she's moved more than 15 times though so possibly

but then if she's moved so much, and before east high she never opened up to anyone, she's never been kissed then?? damn

same though Gina so let's be besties please

heartbreak president is a great song title idea, give Nini a call rn

but wait

is the no strings attached feeling thing about her telling Ricky she liked him? she thought she was moving away so she thought it'd be no strings attached???

guys I think I figured it out insert the "I've connected two dots" meme

THE DUKE SWEATSHIRT

IS THAT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S

OMG I LOVE I LOVE

NOT THAT I KNOW OF???

ma'am did you just kill me

yes you did

Lynne and Ricky have such a weird relationship

YES IT DID SUCK

TODD SUCKS

LYNNE SUCKS

yeah I get that you wanted Ricky to like Todd BUT THAT WASN'T THE TIME

right so we already know that Ricky was so desperate to keep Nini cuz he didn't want to be like his parents, and now Lynne's talking about this-

Richard needs a long hug

yes Lynne, it is your fault. thank you for finally admitting it.

YES DYE YOUR HAIR

BLOND HIGHLIGHTS RICKY WILL RISE AGAIN

"sometimes the best, last thing you can do for someone you love, is let them go."

gotta admit I teared up at that point

not me thinking big red was calling ms Jenn cupcake for a hot second-

Carlos please omg, you're at the "beach" and they're leaving for the pool?

also, why not just do the call from the hotel room please omg

"don't ask me"

"Carlos"

OMG WHAT HAPPENED

big red wants the tea

O M G

SEB IS JEALOUS

JEALOUS SEBBY IS MY FAVOURITE THING IDC

I'm surprised ms Jenn knew how to give Nini permission to screenshare tbh

So lily's been stalking the East high kids and spending time editing this video while she's supposedly in an immersion trip.... right

EJ and Ashlyn's picture is so chaotic, what even is happening there

"slacking off" bestie its spring break, obviously they're confident enough that they'll get it done in time so why not focus on your own musical.

jealous seb = sassy seb

please what if those guys Carlos is posing with are his cousins or something and that's why he's so confused about Seb

6 YEAR OLD EJ I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM

Nini saying she's obsessed with her ex, that's not weird at all 👍

I can just tell Matt had a blast harassing Julia with those puppets.

Jack please dont be like that, "yet"

chances are you'll never see eachother again 🥰

(honestly sometimes I really miss those friends I made on trips and stuff when we'd spend the day or week together, only to never see them again....those were the good days though)

Ashlyn and Nini should write more songs..... something better than this one at least

Nini: "im good"

cue the Tia Mowry (please I can't spell) crying gif

oh I forgot Ricky was in the show for a hot second

1. where did Gina get to film this without people being around

2. did she just... randomly change her clothes???

ok but the transition between Carlos and EJ

*chefs kiss*

now everyone shut up, EJ's singing

oh i think I'm pregnant

HIS MUSCLES

YES KOURTNEY

I love how big red and Kourtney went from being "the best friends™" to the couple in season 1, to kinda close themselves and having their own plots

sebby makes me so happy

props to biggies editing skills honestly

PORTWELL BEING SIDE TO SIDE I CANT

AND SEBLOS OMG

big red lives for the drama

"wow" so true Ricky

no he is not cute, stop it

"holding" ok that's kinda cute

yeah EJ's a lucky guy😌

jokes aside, it's not that hard to exchange numbers-

keep in touch if you want

ok I really like Jack now

if he comes back in season 3, maybe have him be LGBTQ+ ?

like the only out characters they have rn are Seb and Carlos and they're like the sterotypes, yk?

I'd love to see jack kinda break the mold

Ricky's breaking my heart

that song just hurts

the only thing

now I don't hate Lynne????????

HOW DARE THEY WRITE IN A PROPER REDEMPTION ARC FOR HER

UGH IM SUPPOSED TO HATE HER FOREVER

I mean I don't live her now but she's good

but honestly

"mom can I show you something"

IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL

THE PICTURE AND EVERYTHING OMG

I'm sobbing please help

Gina saying she's just waiting for the right guy and then EJ coming to the airport to pick her up late at night without her asking, offering to bring her back in the morning so she won't have to Uber, bringing her a granola bar (WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE FORGOT TO PACK) and without expecting anything in return???

ms ma'am you've got a keeper right there

her smile at the end was so heartwarming I really can't.

this episode was great.

it felt really short but I liked it, great character development for Ricky, Lynne and Gina.

Cant wait for next episode to see more of EJ being the ideal boyfriend /hj

[thexfridax]

Wynonna Earp Boss Hopes Syfy Finale Made You Feel 'All the Things' — Plus, Scoop on One Happy Wedding Accident

By Matt Webb Mitovich, tvline.com / April 9 2021, 8:02 PM PDT

The following contains spoilers from the Syfy finale of Wynonna Earp.

After four years of protecting Purgatory with her Peacemaker, Wynonna Earp got to quite literally ride off into the sunset. And she did so while straddling a motorcycle, with Doc Holliday seated behind her.

Mind you, the two almost didn’t wind up together. Following the simply beautiful “WayHaught” wedding, Doc (played by Tim Rozon) was determined to put Purgatory in Charlene’s rear view mirror and get to living life as “just a man,” and Wynonna (Melanie Scrofano) felt compelled to stay put as Purgatory’s protector. But with an empowering nudge from li’l sis Waverly (Dominique Provost-Chalkley), Wynonna caught up to her man and professed her love, after which they decided to travel light, for the first time in a long time, and pay their daughter Alice a visit in MIracles, Montana.

TVLine spoke with series creator Emily Andras about crafting this very fine finale, at least one “happy accident” that wound up stirring many emotions, and more.

TVLINE | The finale has just aired…. What emotions do you hope the fans are feeling at this moment?

Just head-to-toe body warmth, and love, and affection, and wistfulness…. And a little bit of bittersweetness. I feel like joy has to be paired with nostalgia, so I hope they’re feeling all the things. But hopefully not hungover!

TVLINE | At what point over the years did you ever envision Wynonna and Doc riding off into the sunset?

Ahhh! I almost never even let myself envision it, you know? It’s so funny — when you start doing a show, you have all sorts of ideas about what pairings are going to rise to the top, who’s going to end up with whom, and one of the joys of Earp is that so many different things have happened. But those two characters have certainly earned the chance to try to be happy, whatever that means to them. I never knew that I would be allowed to end such a romantic pairing with the woman driving the motorcycle and the guy on the back.

TVLINE | I’m watching that final sequence and it almost feels alien, seeing the two of them head off into what I think of as “the real world.” But I also found that viscerally exciting, to see so much ahead for them.

That’s so lovely, thank you for saying that. I feel like having the world ahead of them and being such an unusual couple, I would love to see what happens next for them. I’m sure there will be lots of crazy sex and crazy arguments and crazy laughter. So, godspeed! Godspeed.

TVLINE | When throwing a season-ending wedding, what is Emily Andras’ marching order? “Above all else, this wedding has to be…”?

It has to honor to all of the characters — and by that, I mean it has to try to find a moment for every special pairing on the show, not just WayHaught. I think it’s important to pay due respect to how far Waverly and Doc have come; she never gave up on him, she always saw a better man in him — and now he gets to be the best man! Nedley (Greg Lawson) and Nicole’s (Kat Barrell) relationship, that paternal/daughter bond is so special, so honoring that was very important.

And at the end of the day, I still think the real love affair of the show is the Earp sisters, so I ended to make sure that that was honored. I really love the parallel with the pilot, where Wynonna came into town against her will and was so hungry to leave but was forced to stay. And now you have Waverly secure enough in how their relationship has evolved, that she knows Wynonna deserves to leave again — because she’ll come back.

More than anything, it was about giving every character a moment of happiness. Even Jeremy (Varun Saranga) becoming deputy chief of Black Badge and maybe finding a new date…. It was all about finding everyone a moment of potential joy, after they’ve gone through so much after four seasons.

TVLINE | Talk about the decision to have empty guest chairs laid out with the names of those who are no longer with us or didn’t make it to the wedding.

That was such a happy accident. We were on-set, it was very much in the middle of the pandemic, and we knew we were going to have a limited number of people for the wedding. But then we put out chairs so you could understand where the aisle was, and they looked really empty. So my incredible director, Paolo Barzman, who also did the pilot, and my art director Trevor Smith, pitched this idea to me. I had sort of joked about, “Wouldn’t it be cool if you had the ghosts of characters past?” In the moment, they said, “What if we hung names on the chairs?” and it was just one of those goosebump moments, like, “That’s brilliant.” So then we have people writing up these cards, rushing them out, and it’s honestly one of my favorite things. Whenever I see that Dolls chair, I just can’t help but feel things.

TVLINE | But Mercedes (Dani Kind), to be clear, is still with us.

She’s just out, like, being her best vampire self. She’s out being an amazing vampire, yeah. I still have that spinoff if you want to help me sell that!

TVLINE | If anything caught me a bit off-guard, it was us getting a song from Rachel (played by Martina Ortiz-Luis).

The thing about Martina is that she is a phenomenal singer. She is the anthem singer for the Toronto Maple Leafs — so she’s quite a star here! — and she was on Pilipinas Got Talent back in the day…. It seemed like a waste to not have someone with such an exceptional voice perform! And what better song to lay over the necessary wedding montage than a WayHaught classic (Fleurie’s “Wildwood”), the song that was playing the first time WayHaught kissed. It’s a bit of an Easter egg for those hardcore WayHaughters!

TVLINE | I don’t think anyone would have ever felt like a “Dark Angel Waverly” detour was missing, if you hadn’t spent time on it the episode prior. Why did you feel it was important to go there during one of the final hours?

The truth of it is that honestly we’ve been balancing the spectre of whether we were going to have a Season 5 or not. When we started breaking Season 4 two years ago, we were looking down the barrel of about 24 episodes, so [when you get half that] you’re like, “What are we going to keep, and what are we going to pitch overboard? What can we live without learning about?” I would argue that this idea of Waverly having a darkness inside of her did have to be highlighted after four seasons. I completely agree that in a perfect world I could have done eight episodes of Dark Angel Waverly, exploring that and seeing it come to pass. But if we ever get more story, I don’t know if Waverly has complete control over that part of herself. I dont think it’s “gone.” If Nicole puts mayo instead of mustard on her sandwich, who knows what’s going to sprout out!

TVLINE | I mean, if only to see what other outfits Dark Waverly has.

As long as she keeps her thigh holster, she’s ready to go.

TVLINE | Looking back at these last few episodes, what are you most proud of?

‘m so proud of this cast. It’s so boring, but God, just to see them grow and thrive and shine…. performing comedy and emotion, seeing their commitment to the show, and the feelings…. It’s just been such a joy to see such an amazing group of people get their due. They really are that wonderful, off-screen as well.

I’m also pretty happy — in this day and age, and despite all the fights the show has been through — that if this is the end, I feel like that’s a pretty nice finale, a pretty good topper on the cake. I feel like the fans will feel like they went on a journey, and they left the characters in an interesting, good place. And look, that’s really rare in TV, to end your story the way you want. How can I be anything but grateful, at the end of the day?

TVLINE | When I was writing my tweet the other morning, I wanted to call it a “very fine finale,” but I worried you’d think I was saying it was only “fine.” But it was a very fine finale!

No, you have to keep me hungry! You get to challenge me, Matt. Listen, I just didn’t want to risk…. I’m the queen of 75 cliffhangers, but I feel like the fans have worked so hard for us, for so many years, that it was more important that they got closure, just in case. But there’s always another demon, there’s always another thing to trigger Dark Angel Waverly. There’s always more story, but at least you have this, no matter what.

TVLINE | And if some network or streamer does ride to the rescue, would there be something that brings Wynonna and Doc back to Purgatory? Or might a Season 5 be without the two of them?

Look, the show is called Wynonna Earp, so you need Wynonna Earp. She’s still the champion, she’s still got the magic gun and the best hair on the show — sorry, everyone else!

There are a couple of unresolved issues. We still have Eve, who we kicked out the the Garden very early in the season, and who can kind of shapeshift; she could take on the appearance of any one of our characters! That would certainly throw a wrench in the works in Purgatory. There are a million different reasons to bring Wynonna back, to help out her sister.

TVLINE | And lastly, was there anything you had to cut or just didn’t have room for, or any returning cast you couldn’t fit in?

Oh, tons. But look, you kind of hit the nail on the head earlier. I’m always striving to be better, and some stuff at the end felt a little rushed, with Dark Angel Waverly. I think if it hadn’t been a pandemic, there would have been more people at that wedding. I would have loved four more episodes to round the bend there. But look, that’s Wynonna Earp, man — perfectly imperfect! So that’s what we did, and what a ride it’s been. The ride of a lifetime for me.

[leahseclipse]

An (un)usual surprise

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Gender neutral Reader

Category: Comfort

Warnings: Adoption, fluFf, onlY flufF

Summary: During the team’s usual dinner party at Rossi’s house, Reader and Spencer both have an exciting surprise to announce to the team.

Requested by @ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff​

A/N: I apologize ksksksksk, i dont know anything about adoption stuff- but here we go, my first gendEr nEutrAl fiC :D

Word count: 2.2 k

You had always appreciated Rossi’s dinner parties, he had been welcoming with you since the first time you had gone here with Spencer; it had been a long week, and since you haven’t been able to see him; he had thought it’d be a great occasion for you to see each other.

It had been two years since you had grown closer to them, they had eventually become family as well; you began to understand why Spencer liked them so much. 

It had taken him a bit of time to get you to introduce you to them, the team had apparently heard rumors of Reid having a partner, but other than that, nothing much; he was quite personal when it came to his private life; and with the job he was doing, he didn’t want anything to happen in case someone would attempt at harming you. 

Although the chances of this scenario happening were quite slim, he still preferred to be careful about it, no matter how many times you would convince him to think of the opposite. 

When he had decided for you to come with him, his coworkers apparently convinced him a bit after he had told, seeing how nervous and excited he seemed earlier in the day. He hadn’t stopped thinking of it: Spencer at thought that it could be the perfect occasion, and that with his work, it wouldn’t have been much sooner; so he had called you the day before; at 11pm, suddenly asking if you wanted to meet his friends, just like that. He hadn’t told you what he had been thinking about, but he probably was afraid that you’d decline because of whatever reason that could refrain you from attending the party. 

His call had surprised you since you were half asleep from the long day you had, but you had nonetheless accepted the invite, since you hadn’t anything planned that day. The next words had been nothing but an ocean of apologies when he had found that he had woken you up, resulting in you trying to get him to calm down as you had assured that it wasn’t much of a big deal. 

Even with your groggy state you didn’t seem much excited, you really were. It had been a while since he had begun talking about them, when they were on cases, at the office, whatever his mind contained, which had made you more and more excited at each of his words whenever you’d ask about them, or when he’d bring them in the conversation, whether you were at his apartment or on the phone.

You often were more on the phone than at your respectives homes because of how much time his work was taking, resulting in the both of you not seeing each other for a week sometimes, you had gotten used to it, even if it had made you a bit sad not to see him. You didn’t want him to know it, he had enough stress from his work, you didn’t need to add much worry than he already had; even if he insisted for you to tell whatever you felt like, even if you were in a bad mood while he was working, he always felt the need to know how you felt, in order to try his best to make you feel better as he couldn’t be with you. 

A year after you met the team, it was between two cases that he had decided to propose to you. He only had a couple days with you before another case would make him busy again. You both were in his apartment, watching whatever was on tv at 9pm. He had pretended to go to your bedroom to grab another blanket for you, but you didn’t find it suspicious, he often acted like this, he wanted to make sure that you weren’t cold, he didn’t want you to have a cold if he happened to be on a case.

When it had been a moment since he left, you decided to turn your head to the direction of the room, not seeing him in sight. Even if you didn’t want to, you slowly got up from the couch, stretching up for a bit, before heading to the room, expecting to see him asleep on your bed. 

But when you had gone into the room, you certainly didn’t expect to see him with a squared box in one of his hands, as his face turned into a worried and stressed mess. He had taken a deep breath when he had seen you, as you stepped further in the room.

Everything happened fast after that; you had jumped into his arms before he could even pronounce the question; but nonetheless, had accepted his proposal. 

You couldn’t have said no to the man you dearly loved, always here to support you, even if he only can talk to you for a minute or so, or sends a text when he’s at work. 

Your normal tv date night had turned out to be more surprising than ever. 

When you had gotten married, a flow of future projects had been included in your daily conversations, including the topic of having a kid.

But the worries about the matter would do nothing but increase on Spencer’s side. 

He kept saying that his genes wouldn’t be genes he’d want his child to ever have, he had been nothing but afraid of the moment the child would be born; his father had left him as a child, nonetheless, he didn’t know what it was like to have a father figure as he only grew up with his mother. 

On your side, you were completely lost on the whole parenthood stuff, and you always felt like you wouldn’t be ready at all to go through nine months, after you had heard other experiences from some friends that had children. 

You both were tied at point 0 on this subject, but as the conversation was brought up on a rainy day at a café; you had proposed an idea.

“Look, I know that we both are lost as hell about the ‘kid matter’, but when you left yesterday I got an idea, but I don’t know if you would be up..”

“Go ahead, I’m all ears.” 

“Well, um...what if we, adopt a kid?” 

“You want to...adopt a kid? I mean, are you sure?”

“Well, I think that would be the best option for both of us. You’ve always been worried about passing your genes to your child, and I’m not really enchanted by the idea of going through nine months so...I thought that would be a good idea that we’d both like, but if you’re not okay with this-”

“No, not at all! I just uh...asked, because if you really wanted the child to be yours or-”

“Biological or not, it will be mine, ours. It won’t change anything whether we’re blood related or not. We’ll love them the same. 

“Do you think we can really do this? I just...wouldn’t want the child to feel unloved, or anything else because I wouldn’t know how to act as a good father since you know, barely had a present father figure in my childhood.”

“You’ll be fine, no, amazing. I know you can do it, you’re amazingly caring, nice and the way you act when you’re with JJ’s kids, you’re made to be a dad, you know how to act with kids, and I’m sure that nothing could go wrong. Look at me, I don’t know anything at all about parenthood, but I do want to have a kid, and in this case, we’re gonna give a chance to a kid that didn’t get to have one.”

“I know, I’m just...afraid.”

“I know you are, I am too. But we can do this, I know we can. “

“Yeah, we can.”

“Hell yeah, we are capable of this.” You said, as you leaned in for a kiss, returned a few seconds after. You both had felt the other smile against the other’s lips to the wonderful journey that would change your lives; in a good way, of course. 

*

Who would have thought that a year later, the journey awaiting the both of you, that had you go through sleepless nights because of stress, planning everything in secret and almost getting caught a few times, would have been the most amazing thing that could have happened? 

You had both fallen in love with a little girl named Clara; she was about five years old, she really was full of joy, liked to talk with people of whatever went through a child’s mind, she really didn’t have any trouble socializing with people she didn’t know. 

But to Spencer and you, she was perfect. You swore that you could have imagined a lifetime of memories when both of your eyes laid on her. 

She also had Spencer’s hair, a detail that you didn’t fail to notice.

She really was everything both of you had wished for, and the love you had been ready to give her since you first heard about her would be unconditional. She wasn’t your biological child, but you would love her as she was, nothing could change that.

The adoption process would be long, but you both were determined to adopt her, no matter what. 

In the meantime, Spencer had decided to bring you to Rossi’s usual dinner parties after both of you happened to be free at the same time for once. You hadn’t told them anything about it, but since the adoption process had seemed to go well, you had thought that it would be a good time to announce the team. 

You had both stopped the car in front of the house, heading in the alley leading to the entrance of the house, as you had entered along with Spencer in the house , welcomed by Emily. 

The rest of the night had gone pretty well, from talking about cases to events that had occured, no one could get bored. 

Towards the end of the night, Emily, JJ, Penelope and Tara had stayed in the living room with Rossi, while Luke, Matt, Derek and Hotch had stayed in the back with you, as both of you had exchanged knowing looks, and without talking to each other, you knew what he meant. 

To your surprise, Derek had both caught you once, first thinking that it just was for whatever reason, but after a few times, your stares had happened to be suspicious. 

“Something tells me the lovebirds have a thing to say to everyone, or is it just me?” Derek had asked Luke, as Matt frowned, looking at you.

“Yeah, they got somethin’.” Matt joined the conversation. 

“Hey y/n, mind telling us? We’re curious now.” Luke asked, tapping your shoulder to bring your attention. 

“We...may have something, yeah.” You said, as you glanced at Spencer.

 “Yeah, we might.” He had answered, as you looked at him; like you wanted him to tell it instead of you. “You were the one that insisted on saying it now, so now you’re doing it.”

“Seriously?”

“Yep, 100%.” 

“You’ve been exchanging looks with him all night, and now you’re shy? Come on y/l/n, go on.” Derek teased. 

“I...okay. We’ve been thinking about it for a while now and uh...we began looking into it, and filing paperwork so...okay,” you said, as you took a deep breath. “ we’re adopting a child.” You announced, as everyone became silent, apparently shocked by the sudden news. 

“But- s-since when? We uh...never heard about it, how come we never found out?” Luke asked, visibly confused about the situation. 

“We wanted it to be a surprise.” You said.

“So, we get to be uncles?!” Luke asked, eyes widening. 

“Yes, you get to be uncles.” Spencer answered, as Luke gave a high five to Derek and Matt.

“So, the kid is gonna be a father.” Hotch stated. 

“Is it a girl or a boy?” Matt asked.

“A girl, her name is Clara.” You answered.

“I don’t know how to react honestly, my mind is telling me to either jump out of joy or cry for an hour; but I’m gonna avoid embarrassing myself and avoid crying even if my whole mind is telling me to do it.” Luke admitted, earning laughs from everyone around.

“You can cry, it’ll stay between us.”

“Nah I’m okay, I’m okay.” Luke said, as it was kind of obvious that he was lying. The conversation had soon been interrupted by the sounds of various voices coming from the girls, and Rossi behind them.

“Are you having a secret party or what?” Emily interrupted. 

“No, they just announced that they adopted a child.”

“Oh, then it’s- WHAT?” She yelled.

“See? That’s us when they announced it.” 

“I- when, how?!”

“It’s been a month since we did it. We just waited for a great occasion to say it.”

“And they hid it from us without us even guessing anything.” Rossi said.

“I guess we’re prolonging the night then?” Emily asked.

“We are.” Spencer and you had both answered.

A lifetime worth of memories awaited the both of you, and you would never regret it if it meant to have someone to look to, give love and watch grow, all of this for nothing but never ending love,

forever.

----------

Taglist; @pinkdiamond1016​ ; 

[samhaininthemembrane]

🎃Welcome!🖤

This is my side blog where I can talk and vent about my disability and neurodivergence, as well as reblog things related to those topics. I will state that I am not an authority on anything discussed here beyond my own lived experience. Please take anything I say with a reasonable grain of salt and remember that I am not a professional.

About Me

My name is Madi/Mati (pronounced Mad-ie/Matt-ie,which in my version of english sounds roughly the same), but you can call me Samhain (pronounced Sau-ihn) or other derivatives of my username if you prefer.

I am 28 years old. If you dont want to interact based on age, keep that in mind!

My pronouns are She/They/He. Feel free to mix them up from time to time!

I am nonbinary with femme leanings because gender is complicated and that's what I've decided is the most accurate description of my lived experience. I mention this specifically because it affects how I live with my disability. I will accept good natured questions about it.

I am queer, and I will say the word queer in reference to myself or the community. I have several different orientations and sometimes it's just too complicated to get into all of them.

I am inclusive and intersectional, as I understand that everything affects everything else in different ways and that a persons life experience can't be compartmentalized like that.

I am a vocal proponent of science based medicine, therapy, and medication as well as a proponent of informal or self diagnosis. I understand that care isnt accessible to everyone and that it's more nuanced than that. Everyone deserves respect and dignity regardless of whether or not they can or want to seek treatment for themselves.

I struggle a lot with memory problems, so it is not uncommon for me to reblog things I've reblogged before, repeat points I've already made, forget to include important tags or image descriptions, and forget to respond to messages for long stretches of time. I appreciate your patience in this regard and do not mind gentle and well intentioned reminders!

My ask box is generally open, and anons are fine! It might take me a bit to answer, but I will do my best to do so! I promise I'm not ignoring you!

What I Have?

First off, I will say that no one is entitled to this information, and I am choosing to make it known because I want to. No one is ever entitled to info you deem private and the idea that you have to prove you're "___ enough" to strangers is, frankly, fucked up. I'm okay with being open about it because I'm an adult and incredibly open about it in my daily life, but you dont have to be.

I'll put this below a read more as to not conjest things too much. 🖤

Known disabilities/neurodivergences:

ADHD (Inattentive Type) - Got diagnosed as a kid but I didnt know it. Didn't get treatment until I was an adult. I have been getting treatment for this, and my mental health toolkit is pretty established. It is still definitely something I struggle with that hinders a lot of aspects of my life, but therapy and meds changed my life.

Spinal Injury - Happened when I was 20 for no reason. Have had surgery that helped with most of it, but still experience effects of it. (Herniation between L4-L5 if you're curious)

Chronic Vestibular Migraines - Started in July of last year, very frequent. Currently seeking treatment for it, but since it's not a super well understood type of migraine, it's hard to treat.

Generalized Anxiety, Depression, and S.A.D. - I lump these all together because they kind of go together. Also I've never known another disabled person who didnt have some variety of this (although most disabled people I know became disabled later in their lives.)

Geographic Tongue and Various Allergies - I have to careful to not make my tongue flare up beyond what is tolerable when I eat, and there is not a time of year when I don't have to take allergy meds. My allergies have never put me in the hospital, but I do get hives, restricted breathing, etc. (Yes, I am aware that Geographic Tongue is an outdated diagnosis, but its easier than explaining the nuance of it).

Dental Issues - I don't know about a specific diagnosis but my teeth are for sure bad.

Mild Scoliosis - Enough that it affects me, not enough to get treatment about it.

General chronic pain and fatigue

Suspected disabilties/neurodivergences (i.e. not formally diagnosed):

Autism - My therapist and I have been talking about it and I'm currently deciding if I want to seek out a formal diagnosis or not, seeing as it's known to be a difficult process. This would be in addition to the ADHD.

Auditory Processing Disorder - it's a pretty common comorbidity with ADHD and I'm pretty sure I have it.

Dyscalcula - never formally diagnosed, but suspicion is there.

Something more than just a migraine disorder, since I have a lot of various issues and the meds I get prescribed for migranes dont work well and have horrible side effects.

Some sort of autoimmune disorder, since I get sick incredibly easily (about one big sickness a season) and it wipes me out every time. I also get skin infections incredibly easily and that's gotta be a thing, right?

[voidcat]

“Where do you think you’re going?”

Characters: Matsukawa Issei/Reader

requested by anon, prompt 9

Warnings: reckless drinking, dont drink the amount you cant handle kids, esp if you’re not supervised by someone you trust

Word Count: 2.3k , this was supposed to bE SHORT, seijoh brainrot........

It’s loud, too loud. If they weren’t in your head, you’re sure you wouldn’t be able to hear your thoughts. Is that what people listen to as music nowadays?

The flashy lights all around and people keep bumping into you, you remember once again why you’re not the party type. Which brings the question: what are you doing at one?

See, the answer to it is quite simple, really. Maybe a little sad too, even pathetic. You’re beyond caring for the night. You’ve gone to a party, can it get any lower than that? What a waste of night, is the only thing you can say to yourself.

Placing the untouched cup in your hand to the counter, you look around to find the bathroom. Exiting the kitchen is a nice first step. The blur of bodies only make your task more difficult. Getting tired of people bumping into you, you start shouldering the ones not moving, crashing into people if they refuse to make way, expecting you to go through the five centimeter long gap.

And at long last, you find what you were looking for. Checking to see no one else is in, you lock the door behind you and turn on the tap. Splashing some cold water to your cheeks, careful not to mess with your make up, you take a look at yourself in the mirror. Why did you let him drag you into this in the first place?

Or better yet, why do you keep following wherever Matsukawa Issei takes you, never saying no, never refusing the puppy looks, always right by his side... why do you keep doing this to yourself? Since when have you gotten so weak towards him, for him?

Exiting the bathroom and spotting him in the distance, you recall earlier today. It was just a usual hangout, nothing special. Typical grabbing a lunch together and procrastinating when the reason you met in the first place was studying. Thirty minutes of silence, finally finding your focus fully on your text book and you jolt up suddenly at the contact you feel by your waist. Looking to your right and seeing his pen hanging by your waist, ready to poke again if necessary, you just rub your side.

“What, Issei?”

“There’s a party tonight, starting around 8. Would you like to go with me?” Oh, this again. Another hopeless party invitation. He never seems to give up, though knowing how much you dislike the parties. One party couldn’t hurt, right? You can’t help but admit to yourself how curious you are to see him at one. So you just shrug. “Sure, pick me up by 7 if we want grab dinner beforehand.”

“Look I know you don’t like the- Wait, really? Are you sure?” The caught off-guard look suits him.

“Yeah, I mean I kept saying no but it’s time I expand my… extra curriculum activities.” He grabs you by the shoulders.

“Who are you and what have you done to (Lastname)? They would never accept an offer from me that easily.” You can’t help but laugh at his dramatic antic. Pushing his hands off you, holding the said hand while you can, you roll your eyes again.

“I am fine. Can’t I be the supportive friend for once?”

“Oh but please! You always are the supportive one.” He says as he wraps you in a big hug. It’s moments like these when you feel your breathe hitched, heart racing and brain imagining a scenario you’ll never get to live.

As you eagerly make your way to him, the figures in your way make way and you see he’s not alone. Some girl talking to him, if eyeing someone like that and touching their muscles nonstop can be count as talking, not to mention leaning over him on a constant. What’s worse is he doesn’t look bothered slightest bit. Can you blame him, though? You’re sure it’s not the first time she has approached him, she hangs around the gym sometimes, walks up to him after their shared classes, she’s clearly interested and makes no effort in hiding it.

She is beautiful, no straight man, or lesbian or bisexual, in their right mind would ignore someone such as her. And yet you can’t help but feel jealous. Jealous that you have no chance of competition, no chance of winning, no such luck in being seen as “‘more than just a friend”. Changing your direction suddenly, you walk back up to the kitchen and grab the first untouched cup you see. Searching for a bottle of alcohol next, you don’t care what it is as long as it is alcohol, you pour it down until your cup is filled to the brim.

Looking outside, you can see them again. Issei smiling and looking as breathtaking as ever, it hurts that the smile is for her. You down the whole cup before you can register what you’re doing. The party is just getting started, you better get into the mood.

After a while it gets fuzzy. You lost count of the drinks you’ve had, the shots you’ve taken too. You’re glad to have eaten before the party at least, the alcohol won’t hit as hard.

Maybe it’s already hit? You’re not sure, you feel warm and bubbly but you still walk just fine. Walking up to people and joining the conversations randomly, leaving as quickly once you’re bored, you walk around and around and around...

It must be late, is it late? You try checking your watch but you can’t make sense of the little circle plastered on your wrist, it seems too tiny.

At some point, you’re singing along to a song you know. And making the most absurd dance moves to it. It doesn’t matter, everyone else around is drunk as hell, looking more ridiculous than you are, moves not even making any sense. It makes all the crashing more understandable, it’s good to just move around and not apologize once. To let some steam off, get loose and do whatever the hell you like.

Except it isn’t as good because one thing you truly want in that moment and you don’t even know the room he is in. Maybe you should have another drink just in case and decide to cross the line from tipsy to drunk. It’d be good to forget about tonight once you wake up.

Making a 180 to go back to the kitchen for another drink, you crash into something warm, someone. Probably a chest. Feeling warm hands on your shoulders adjusting you, to keep your balance, you don’t even look up. Waving your hand in the air, you shout out an apology.

“(Name)? Is that you? I’ve been looking all over for you!” Hearing your name come out of someone’s lips is unexpected, but recognizing the voice makes all the fuzziness go away in a second. You make a mental note to name it the “Issei effect” if you ever come up with a hangover elixir of sorts.

“Hiiii Mattsun.” Hearing yourself speak feels weird, especially if you have no idea if your lips are actually moving. “I’ve been here this whole time! Was about to go get a drink, want some?” You can imagine the worried look on him, so you keep your gaze focused on his tshirt. What was that color called anyway?

“Are you sure you’re alright? We can leave if you wa-“ he stops mid-sentence to examine you from head to toes. “Have you been drinking?”

The tone in his voice indicates, it’s wiser not to answer him. Your mouth decides otherwise. “Maybeee.”

“But you hate alcohol! And you’re a lightweight!”

“Nope!” You pop the ‘p’ as you reply. “Had a change of heart! I like new stuff now! Maybe you don’t know me as well as you thought.” Crossing your arms, you look to your left. “Hah, lightweight!” You mumble.

“I mean it. If you want to leave, we can. When I asked you to come, I didn’t do it so we could get separated. I just wanted to spend some time with my friend.”

Ouch. That word sure hurts. More than the movies and books can even tell. You suddenly feel sick, stomach empty and deadweight.

“M’kay, let’s leave.” You say softly.  Seeing the smile rise like the sun on his face, you can feel butterflies in your stomach. Truly feel it. The term no longer sounds ridiculous when it becomes real for you.

“Okay. Let me just grab by jacket and we’ll be out in a minute. Wait by the door if you want, it’s whiter there.” He says and leaves in a hurry.

Making your way to the door in slow steps, you reach it in no time. When you look back at the apartment, all the people partying seem so irritating to you. It’s hard to believe you were just like them a while ago. Eyes trailing the crowd, you see Issei again, a smile making way to your lips, almost on instinct now.

It dies out before it can bloom.

Because there she is, again, and he is still smiling at her and nodding and talking and suddenly all the hurry he made to find his jacket seems like it was not to make you not wait, but to get to her quickly.

Looking to the hall, you spot a tall boy holding a bottle of what you hope is booze. Grabbing it with a “Sorry, emergency.” You take a big gulp of the bottle. To hell with staying tipsy.

God, is that how plain vodka tastes? The Russians must be out of their minds. And yet, you keep taking gulp after gulp, sip after sip and open the door to escape the suffocating party air.

If Issei wants to find you so badly, he must know how to do it.

Walking a bit and sitting in the pavement, your head drops to your knees, bottle still in one hand. You’re not sure how long it has been since you arrived.

Hearing footsteps coming closer to you and coming to a stop right by your side, you look up to find an angry Issei. Arms crossed, he’s looking down at you, trying to look as mad as he can but worry painted in his eyes. It hurts how well you know him sometimes.

“So?” You make no noise.

“Care to explain?” He’s tapping his foot this time, probably to get your attention. You grunt in response.

“Do Not grunt at me young lady. I am only asking because I am worried, can’t you see!” Voice raised, you realize you’ve never heard him raise his voice, not at you.

“Maybe I don’t want you to worry about me! Or maybe I do but not like this! Have you thought about it?” You snap.

“What’s that supposed to mean?-“ not waiting for him to finish his words, you stand up fast, stumble for a mini second in the process, the bottle gripped tighter, and you start walking away.

“Hey! Where do you think you’re going?” He calls our behind you, walking after you.

“Away from you! Leave me alone Mattsun.” You yell back, quickening your steps. Damn his height and tall legs because he catches up to you in no time and grabs your wrist, trying to stop you from going any further.

You expect a “fine.” And a “no.” And maybe a “stop being so childish and talk to me.” But not a “Why are you calling me that?”

The softness in his voice catches you off guard. You stop and turn to look at him, your wrist already free of his grasp. “Calling you what?”

“You never call me Mattsun. It’s always Issei. Did I do something wrong?” You don’t meet his gaze.

Maybe it’s the hurt in his words, the sadness in his eyes or the alcohol in your blood. When you look up to meet his gaze, you’re certain you see something die. “I don’t want to talk about it.” You gather enough energy to say the words.

“Why now? We’ve never hold back anything from one another.” You turn your head at his words again. This is exactly why you don’t want to talk. Hearing a sigh behind you, he clears his throat. Probably one last try, you’re determined to keep your stance.

“Look, whatever it is, please tell me. Maybe you’re drunk and happen to be the unfiltered honest kind. You may as well not be drunk at all and honestly this is a lot of better. But please give me a reason, an explanation and if it’s so bad or awkward, we won’t talk about it in the morning and pretend we were both drunk. How does that sound?” The offer itself sounds ideal and he, hopeful. You nod your head as you sit down on the pavement, the bottle now in your lap. Following your cue, he sits next to you.

The words are a mumble of incoherent sounds. You can sense him leaning towards you, considering to say your next words loudly, just to irritate him, you decide against it.

“I don’t want you to worry about me as a friend.” You say. He looks confused. Silencing him with your finger before he can say anything, you continue. “I want you to see me in a different light for once. I am sick of the back and forth dance we keep having.”

He stares at you for what feels like forever. Followed by laughter. It only gets louder.

“Stop- Stop that! Are you… laughing at my feelings?” You make no effort in hiding the disappointment in your tone.

“No! It’s just- I- I’ve been thinking of the same thing for too long. I can’t believe we were both so blind.” Words interrupted by occasional chuckles, he seems happy, glowing even. You throw yourself at him, arms around his neck.

He speaks to your head next: “If you hadn’t been drinking, I’d even kiss you right now b-“

“Do it then. I am not drunk.” You whisper to his chest.

He kisses the top of your head. “Tomorrow, I promise. For now, let’s get you home.”